#agree or disagree I'm just turning off reblogs

[dragongirltongue]

I think I just generally hate reversal AUs in general 6ecause they feel far more contrived to make all the characters fit into each other's roles or actually miss where the mirror they want to see the other side of actually exists in the original story.

I do enjoy a good AU but reversals in particular just never vibe right with me, like, if you enjoy them that rules but I just can't.

[mysteriouswolf]

I'm going to start this off with saying it hurts. It fucking hurts. It hurts so, so much, and there's parts of me that still desperately want to look for a way out, to make him not the bad guy, but there isn't one.

Wilbur Soot is a fucking asshole. A piece of absolute trash, and it hurts. Because I've looked up to him for so many years now. He's been such an inspiration and comfort in my life, from dealing with issues I have myself, and giving me all the more reason to stay here. And now he's turned out to be like this. To anyone who's been following what I reblog about him, it's conflicting, because my thoughts seem to change by the minute. But I'm hoping in saying this I can clear my head and make a definite decision.

I will never be supporting Wilbur ever again. No matter how much better he gets, I don't care. What he did was unexcusable, and if you think otherwise, you can fuck off of my blog. His "apology" wasn't an apology, and for the most part all he did was defend himself. The responses from other content creators have pushed me to agree that yes, fuck Wilbur. He's an ass. I think I've stated this a couple times.

What he did to them, especially Niki and Tommy was inexcusable as well from what we know, and since Tommy is going on tour in about a week (if he's still going/up to it) PLEASE no one harass him with questions, or how he feels. Please, just leave him alone. I'm sure it's a lot to process for him too- even more than us.

I've seen some posts saying how we should be angry at other content creators for not speaking out sooner, but some of them have hinted at it/tried. And others haven't known enough, or didn't want to start causing something against him. The same reason Shelby didn't want to say his name. Maybe they couldn't. Please leave them alone.

The last thing I would like to say, is maybe controversial. If you disagree with me, I don't care, this is purely my opinion.

You can still enjoy his character. Your stories, your artwork, all that you've done with it. Don't feel bad about keeping it up, because that's yours now. You've worked so hard on it, and cared for that character so much that it's become far more yours than his. In regards to his music, I know his songs have provided a lot of us with comfort, including me. It's going to be really hard for me to stop listening to something I loved, but I'm going to make the effort- especially with his solo albums. Also, please don't harass the other members of Lovejoy. From what we know, they're lovely people, and if you're going to stop listening to them, great, do that, but don't harass them. Please. And if you do choose to listen to them, there's ways you can listen to music without supporting him- in my opinion covers are the best way to do that, but that one is up to you.

To wrap this up, I'd just like to say...please don't send death threats, or threats in general to anyone involved in this situation- including Wilbur. Leave them alone. Please.

This is subject to change if we get more information, but for now and the foreseeable future, this is my stance. I wish everyone hugs and comfort. This sucks. I'm sorry.

[kwanisms]

🎄 Tales from Camp Holiday Special 04 🎄

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➮ bartender!Jeonghan × fem!Reader wc: 8.1k summary: Jeonghan is at work when someone sits down at his bar on December 24th and turns around to find none other than Y/N sitting before him. genres/themes/au: angst (just at the beginning, I promise), fluff, smut; holiday themes; non idol au, bartender au warnings: adult dialogue, female reader, alcohol consumption, mentions of mental health issues and traumatic past events, sexual content (18+ mdni), see smut warnings under the cut! taglist: @yoonguurt @wonw00t @aikisbbq @enhacolor @duchesskaren @sherituhhh @wonderfulshinee @gaebestie @drunk-on-dk @seokgyuu @salty-for-suga @aaniag @dnylwoo join my taglists: main | TFC: Holiday Special closes when part 7 goes up! Strikethrough means I cannot tag you. MINORS WILL BE BLACKLISTED & BLOCKED. AGELESS BLOGS WILL ALSO BE BLOCKED.

a/n: I think Jeonghan's part was the most gut wrenching for me to write so I'm really excited to write another chance for him and Y/N. A chance for them to start over essentially! Thank you so much for reading! If you like this part, please reblog as it helps spread my stories around! As always, this is a work of fiction and all characters are not reflective of their respective irl counterparts. for entertainment purposes only.

smut warnings: unprotected sex (use protection lol), oral (kinda lol f receiving), fingering (f receiving), dirty talk, dom!Jeonghan, sub!Reader, Jeonghan is pretty pathetic and kind of impatient and he has to hold off from nutting too early 💀 multiple orgasms (f receiving, m receiving), creampie (yum), cumplay, orgasm denial (f receiving), overstimulation (m receiving), sex tape & pictures, and I think that’s all but as usual, if I missed anything, let me know!

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The only thing Jeonghan hated more than his job was his job during the holidays.

Bartending wasn’t the greatest career choice but he did make a decent amount of money and it was only temporary as he finished getting his master’s. He just hated the rush and influx of customers that the holidays always brought. With more customers came more money but it also came with more complaints and more drunken idiocy.

“How was class?” one of his coworkers, Matt,  asked as Jeonghan stepped behind the bar, setting his bag down under the counter. “Exhausting,” Jeonghan replied. “I’m glad the term is over for the holidays.” Jeonghan moved around his coworker and to the terminal to clock in.

“They’re expecting it to be busier tonight,” Matt continued. “Busier than usual?” Jeonghan asked as he turned to look at him. Matt nodded. “The busiest night of the year,” he continued. Jeonghan snorted, shaking his head. “New Year’s Eve would disagree with you.”

Matt let out a chuckle. “According to Jerry, he thinks tonight will be worse than that.” Jeonghan shook his head, glancing over to the door where he saw a line of people waiting to be let in. “He always hopes it’s going to be busier every year,” Jeonghan replied. 

“It’s just wishful thinking.”

An hour later, Jeonghan was mentally cursing himself and wishing he could take his words back as they seemed to have cursed him in his willful denial.

Not only was the club packed but every order that came through the computer was complex with the patrons ordering some of the more complicated menu items. He was partially cursing himself for agreeing to work the night before Christmas Eve shift. He usually had it off to do Holiday stuff in favor of working on Christmas Eve but this year, he agreed to cover Analiese’s shift and she would cover his Christmas Eve one.

It took another couple hours for the flow to die down but Jeonghan was still busy manning the printer, making drinks for all the orders that came through. It was his preferred station, meaning he could just do his work without having to interact much with the customers. Occasionally, he’d have to make a few orders for the patrons at the bar but more often than not, one of the other bartenders would have that covered, allowing Jeonghan to work in peace.

“It’s calmed down a bit,” Matt said as he walked over to use the terminal next to where Jeonghan stood. “I’m going to the bathroom. I’ve had to piss for like two hours. Can you cover the bar for me?” he asked as he started to untie his apron. Jeonghan looked up and nodded. It had been a few minutes since an order came through the printer for him to make.

“Go ahead,” he replied. “I got it.” Matt thanked him and took off, ducking under the open side of the bar and disappearing into the crowd. Jeonghan turned, putting on a fake smile as he greeted the patron closest to him, asking them for their drink order.

Mixing was one of the few skills he’d managed to pick up in his initial round of college; going to house parties and learning which liquors tasted good together as well as the ratios. He honed his skills over a couple years and eventually got his first bartending job at a small hole in the wall. He didn’t get to experiment much with that job as most people ordered wells and beers.

His second bartending job was at an upscale restaurant, mixing drinks like cosmopolitans and manhattans. It allowed him to be a little more creative. It wasn’t until he got to his current job that his creativity really started to flow and he started mixing things together.

Jeonghan finished making a round of drinks for a group of friends gathered around the bar as Matt returned, patting him on the back before grabbing his apron. “Thanks, man,” Matt called over the music as he tied his apron back on and went back to work.

The next couple hours went by as Jeonghan had hoped. The night started getting later, turning into the wee hours of the morning. The club had started to die down, many of the patrons drunkenly stumbling out the front door to find their rides home. Jeonghan was wiping down the counter when he saw movement from the corner of eye.

He glanced up and he was sure his eyes widened comically. His lips parted as he felt his breath suddenly catch. He stood frozen on the spot looking at the person who had just taken a seat at his bar. Someone he hadn’t seen for a long time. Someone he’d just brought up on a camping trip with 12 of his friends. Jeonghan finally found his voice, speaking in a low tone that only two people could hear.

“Y/N?”

You looked back at him, failing to prevent the grin that spread across your face. You hadn’t changed much. You’d matured a bit. You looked much more confident and certain of yourself. You looked incredible. Jeonghan threw a glance at his coworker who was busy making drinks down the bar from him. Jeonghan approached where you sat slowly.

“What’re you doing here?” he asked as he stopped in front of you, holding the towel in both hands tightly. Your smile shifted from amused to sincere in the amount of time it took Jeonghan to blink. “I was in town and decided to drop by one of my favorite places,” you replied. “Although, I didn’t know you worked here,” you added, giving him a once over.

Jeonghan’s cheeks burned. Not from embarrassment exactly. He wasn’t sure why he felt heat spreading across his face and down his neck. What the hell was wrong with him? He was never like this? Was it perhaps because he felt ashamed?

Ashamed of how he left you? Ashamed of never speaking to or seeing you again? Ashamed of leaving you after everything that happened that summer? He couldn’t pick a single reason for feeling this way so he chose to accept all of them at once.

“How long have you worked here?” you asked, pulling his attention from the depths of his thoughts. “Three years,” he answered instantly. “When did you get back in town?” You chuckled softly at his quick response. “Last night,” you answered. Jeonghan noticed Matt starting to approach where he stood and cleared his throat quickly, turning his gaze back on you.

“What can I get you?” he asked, making you look up at him through your lashes. “A Manhattan, please,” you answered, lips threatening to pull into a smirk as you watched Jeonghan get to work, making your drink. He tried not to make too much of a show, making the drink without the flashy movements he normally did to impress patrons and increase his likelihood of getting more tips.

Once he’d finished the drink, he set it on a bar napkin in front of you and watched nervously as you pulled the drink closer. He watched as you picked the glass up and brought it closer to your face, no doubt giving it a sniff before taking a sip and setting it down. “Do you want to open a tab?” Jeonghan asked, quickly beating himself up for his lame question. You shook your head, opening your clutch and pulling out a few bills before handing them to him.

He started to turn away but caught himself when you told him no change, he thanked you, ringing up the drink and cashing it out, putting the change in the tip jar on the back counter by the terminal. He turned back around and started wiping down the counter again, gesturing to Matt to keep his distance.

“So,” he started as you took another sip of your drink. “How long are you in town for?” he asked. You smiled up at him. “A while,” you answered coyly. Jeonghan felt his lips pull into a smirk. “A while, huh?” he asked and you nodded, lifting your glass to take another sip. Jeonghan tried not to watch the way your lips moved or the way you licked them after taking a sip.

“And you’re out this late because…?” he continued, trailing off. “I told you,” you replied. “It’s one of my favorite places.”

The conversation between the two of you continued, briefly interrupted by Jeonghan helping Matt make drinks but the majority of the crowd had disbanded by this point as it was nearing 2 in the morning. The club would be closing soon and for once, Jeonghan found himself wishing for his shift to never end.

He let out what must have been a millionth sigh because you chuckled, looking up at him, chin resting in your hand and your elbow resting on the counter as you stared at him. He’d made a couple more drinks, enjoying your company far too much and watching the way you would pull the cherry garnish off the skewer with just your tongue. He had thought maybe you didn’t realize what you were doing but on the third time, he noticed the way you held his gaze as you did it and he knew you were doing it on purpose.

“Long day?” you asked, tilting your head like a puppy hearing its favorite word. Jeonghan scoffed, shaking his head. “You have no idea. I’m ready to get out of here,” he replied. It was only half true. While his feet did hurt and he was ready to go home, make some ramyeon and enjoy the rest of the night in the comfort of his apartment, he wasn’t quite ready to part ways with you.

“You’ve been at this for a while,” you commented, the smile on your face faltering as you studied his appearance. “The perks of working full time and pursuing a master’s degree,” Jeonghan replied sarcastically. “I live in a state of perpetual exhaustion.”

You reached across the bar, placing your hand over his. “I can tell,” you replied. Jeonghan gave you a tired smile. “Don’t worry,” he replied. “These bags are Gucci,” he added, gesturing to the bags under his eyes from many nights spent doing homework and case work instead of sleeping.

You snorted, pulling your hand away. “Only Gucci?” you asked. “No Chanel?”

It was Jeonghan’s turn to laugh as he shook his head. “Gucci is more affordable,” he replied.

“Oh shut up,” you said with a roll of your eyes. Your smile fell again. “But in all seriousness,” you said softly. “Are you okay?” Jeonghan felt his heart skip a beat, thumping in his chest erratically. “Uh, yeah,” he replied, turning his gaze away. “I’m fine.”

“You just keep sighing,” you explained. “I thought maybe something was bothering you and if so, maybe you’d like to talk about it?” Jeonghan looked back, meeting your curious gaze. “What time are you off?” you asked suddenly, making him almost choke on his own spit.

Before he had a chance to answer, someone else spoke.

“I’m sorry, miss,” Matt suddenly said from beside him, making Jeonghan jump. “Shit, Matt,” he hissed, placing his hand over his chest, feeling his heart pounding. “You nearly scared the life out of me.” Matt chuckled, patting him on the shoulder. “Sorry, man,” he replied before turning to look at you.

“The club’s closing soon.” You nodded with a smile. “Of course,” you replied, picking up your drink and downing the rest of it. Jeonghan turned to Matt, jerking his head as if to say ‘buzz off for a second.’ Matt seemed to understand and walked away to the other end of the bar, leaving Jeonghan to face you alone.

“About what you said before,” he said softly, making you look up as you collected your coat from the back of your barstool. “I really would like to see you while you’re still in town,” he continued, catching you off guard.

“Wow,” you said in faux amazement. “The Yoon Jeonghan wants to see me again?” you asked, making him groan in playful annoyance. “Don’t make a big deal out of it,” he replied, giving you a grin. “I’d like to catch up while I’m not working,” he added. “Okay,” you confirmed with a nod.

“Okay, well what time are you off?” There was that question again.

“You mean tonight?” he asked, looking at you incredulously. You nodded, seemingly unphased.

“Why not? Got plans tomorrow?”

Jeonghan shook his head. “The club’s closed on Christmas,” he explained. “So I’m free all day tomorrow.” You smiled at him warmly. “Then I’ll just wait outside for you?” you asked. Jeonghan’s eyes widened. “It’s probably freezing out there,” he protested. You shook your head.

“Well, I can’t stay in here,” you replied with a chuckle. “I’ll just meet you outside after you get off,” you added, grabbing your clutch only for Jeonghan to reach across the counter and gently take your wrist in his hand. “Wait,” he said quickly. “Let me see if my boss will let you wait in here instead of out in the cold.”

Luckily Jeonghan’s boss was an understanding person and allowed you to stay inside the club as Jeonghan and his co-workers shut down the business. You sat at the bar, watching Jeonghan count his drawer and finish putting in his tips.

“So, where did you have in mind?” he asked suddenly, making you look up from your phone where it sat on the counter, playing a rhythm game. “I thought we could just hit up a pojangmachas around here,” you replied. “Maybe grab some food.” Jeonghan smiled, picking up the money drawer and telling you he’d be right back. He was only gone a few minutes but upon returning, he untied his apron, making sure to take everything from it before stashing it and grabbing his bag from under the counter.

You waited for him to exit the bar, watching as he called a parting to Matt.

Once he joined you at your side, you studied his face at a much closer proximity. “And maybe some soju,” you added, making him look up at you with a confused look on his face. “Soju?” he asked curiously. “Why?” You reached up to run your thumb over the apple of his cheek. It was a simple gesture but one that made his heart skip nonetheless.

“Besides,” you replied, pulling your hand away. “You look like you could use a drink.”

The two of you exited the club, Jeonghan calling goodnight to the bouncers at the doors as he passed. Outside, the temperature had dropped tremendously, a wet sort of chill in the air, one that made his sinuses almost burn from the intensity of the cold. It didn’t take long for the two of you to find a mostly street lined with various food stalls. Most of the stalls had closed up shop as it was now almost 3 in the morning. The only stalls left open were the pojangmachas, covered stalls.

You led Jeonghan over to one of the larger ones, thanking him when he pulled back one of the tent flaps and followed you in.

Inside the tent was much warmer than outside with multiple industrial space heaters placed inside. There were a couple folding tables with folding chairs as well as a cart where a middle-aged woman sat on a bar height chair with a thick cushion. She was reading from some kind of magazine as you approached.

She glanced up at the two of you briefly. “Go ahead and sit down and someone will come by to take your order.” Although her tone was polite, she said it with an air of indifference that screamed ‘I couldn’t care less if you complain.’

You did as she instructed, moving to one of the tables by a space heater and setting your clutch on the table. Jeonghan set his bag on one of the chairs and shrugged off his coat, his eyes moving towards you at the same time. He’d only just noticed what you were wearing and had half a mind to cover you up with his coat.

You were wearing clothes typical of clubbing; high strappy black platform pumps, a fitted silver dress with ruching on the sides and a halter neckline. The back of the dress was open, showing off more skin than Jeonghan thought comfortable, especially in colder temperatures.

You hung your coat on the back of your chair, moving to take a seat. As soon as your butt hit the chair, Jeonghan stood over you, placing his long coat on your lap. “Just in case,” he murmured before taking a seat beside you in an attempt to shield you further from prying eyes.

“What a gentleman,” you replied jokingly. Jeonghan rolled his eyes despite his cheeks starting to heat up again. He didn’t even have time to quip back with some witty comeback before a man with a bored look on his face approached the table.

“What can I get you?”

You glanced at the small menu in Jeonghan’s hands. “Some eomukguk,” you said, glancing up at the man. “And kimbap. What about you?” you asked, looking up at him. Jeonghan let his eyes wander the menu before looking up. “Kimchi-bokkeumbap, please. And some soju,” he replied, looking up at the man who nodded and walked away.

You took the menu from him to look over it closer, allowing Jeonghan the freedom to do with his hands as he pleased. He opted for resting them on the surface of the table, lightly drumming his thumbs on the hard plastic to a beat in his head.

Silence washed over the two of you making Jeonghan want to curl up and hide. He’d never felt so awkward in all his life. “Huh.” he heard you chirp in something akin to mild amusement and curiosity. “Hmm?” he hummed in response, looking at the menu when you showed it to him.

“They have dakkochi with cheese,” you whined, showing him the menu. Jeonghan chuckled as the man returned with a bottle of soju and two glasses. He brought two large bottles of water, setting everything on the table. Jeonghan caught him before he walked away. “Could I add to our order?” he asked to which the man nodded wordlessly.

“Could we get some dakkochi with cheese please?”

The man nodded once more, without speaking, and walked away. Jeonghan turned to find your gaze on him already, your expression unreadable as you studied him. “What?” he asked as he picked up one of the bottles and moved it close to you before opening his. You shook your head, looking down at the bottle and opening it to take a sip.

Jeonghan grabbed the bottle of soju, turning the label to read it before nodding his head.

He offered to pour your shot first and after twisting the cap off, he filled it to the brim, making you grimace. You glanced at him as he poured his own shot, not filling it nearly as much. “You did that on purpose,” you muttered, making him look up an expression of feigned innocence on his face.

“Did what?” he asked. You gestured at your shot glass. “There’s no way I can pick that up without spilling it,” you murmured, noticing the mischievous glint in his eye. “I have no idea what you’re talking about,” he replied, picking up his shot glass and waiting for you to follow.

With a sigh and a roll of your eyes, you very carefully picked up the shot glass. “Bottoms up,” he said before downing the shot with ease. You had a harder time, needing to move carefully so as not to spill any alcohol on you or his coat that was still on your lap.

You managed to swallow all of it, only spilling a tiny bit onto your hand which you quickly licked off and set your glass down. Jeonghan had noticed you licking the alcohol off your hand and his thoughts were suddenly consumed with images of your tongue running along the underside of his--

His thoughts were interrupted as the man returned, carrying the food you both ordered, setting it down on the table and asking if you needed anything else. Jeonghan shook his head, thanking the man who merely nodded and walked away. You smiled at the steaming bowl of eomukguk and immediately reached for a skewer.

Jeonghan started stirring his bokkeumbap, glancing over at your bowl before grabbing one of the small plates and spooning some of the rice onto it. He set it back down in front of you without a word and immediately dug into the dish. Your cheeks burned at the show of affection and thanked him softly.

The two of you ate mostly in silence, sipping on water and downing shots. The first bottle of soju went quickly and another one was brought to your table without you even needing to ask. You were happily munching on your chicken skewers when Jeonghan spoke.

“I never got the chance to apologize,” he started. You looked up at him. “It’s okay,” you replied after swallowing. “No, it’s not okay,” Jeonghan replied, looking back up at you. It was hard to miss the pain in his eyes. He must have held onto the hurt he felt he caused you all those years ago.

You reached across the table just like back in the club to place your hand over his.

“Really, Jeonghan,” you said, saying his name for the first time tonight. It sounded just as heavenly now as it did back then. “I’m okay. At first, yeah, I was upset,” you explained. “But I didn’t stew in it. I picked myself back up and I moved on. And sure, maybe I cried over it a few times but at the end of the day, we both knew that whatever was going on would end. We were young,” you continued.

Hearing the fact that you cried over him, over what he did, made his stomach sink. He moved his hand out from under yours and placed it on top. “I am so sorry,” he started but you shook your head. “It’s in the past,” you reminded him. “Stop living in the past. Focus on what’s happening now.”

Jeonghan met your gaze, your eyes flitted between his, looking back and forth as if searching for something specific in them. Something you hoped to see. Without speaking, Jeonghan raised his hand from the table, cupping your face and sliding his thumb over your cheek.

His heart nearly melted as you leaned into his touch. You were both startled out of your bubble by one of the men at the other table sneezing. It made you jump and Jeonghan pulled his hand back quickly, as if he’d been burned. He coughed a couple times before taking a drink of water.

And as you expected, he changed the subject.

“So, you didn’t tell me exactly how long you plan on staying in town,” he said quietly, glancing up at you.

You looked back at him, swallowing your food before speaking. “Just a while,” you replied. You gestured at the bottle of soju, silently asking if he wanted another shot. He shook his head. “What does that mean?” he asked. “What does a while mean?”

“I dunno,” you said with a shrug. “It means a while?” you added, glancing over at the only other occupied table, making sure they weren’t paying attention before grabbing the bottle of soju and pouring yourself a shot, shushing Jeonghan when he pretended to gasp. You quickly set the bottle down and reached over to slap his arm.

He raised his hand, pretended as if he’d been shot and made a face of extreme pain. You threatened to hit him again, cursing under your breath as he started to whine. You glanced over to see one of the older men at the other table look over his shoulder at you. You bowed your head in a silent apology before looking at Jeonghan who just smiled, laughing maniacally to himself.

“You’re such a menace,” you whispered. Jeonghan swallowed a gulp of water before fixing you with a perplexed stare. “I’m a menace?” he asked. “Look at you,” he added, gesturing at you. You glanced down and back up, shrugging and shaking your head as if to say ‘and?’

Jeonghan scooped up some more bokkeumbap, eyes moving back to meet yours as he opened his mouth slowly and took the bite. You looked away as he made a completely innocent thing mildly suggestive. “See?” you hissed. “Menace!”

Jeonghan covered his mouth as he chuckled before swallowing. “I just like to see you squirm,” he replied softly. “But really,” he continued. “You’re calling me a menace when you’re looking like that?” he asked, glancing up again. You met his gaze, heart skipping. ‘Was he… slut shaming you?’

“Don’t get me wrong,” he started, as if reading your mind. “You look incredible,” he added. “But god does seeing you like that make me want to do things to you.”

You weren’t sure if you were meant to hear the last part and upon glancing at him and finding him staring at you with a smirk on his face, you knew he meant for you to hear him. How did he expect you to respond to such a sexual remark? And more importantly, how did you want to respond?

The heat pooling in your belly spurred your decision to egg him on. See where he would take this.

“Oh yeah?” you asked softly, looking up through your lashes at him. “Like what?”

The smirk on Jeonghan’s face only faltered for a moment before growing. “Shall I tell you?” he asked, leaning forward as he propped his elbow on the table, resting his chin in his hand. He had a sort of dazed smile on his face as he stared at you with those dark eyes.

“Or should I just show you?”

╾───────────────────⭒✧⭒──────────────────╼

How you managed to keep your hands to yourself in the taxi ride back to Jeonghan’s apartment was beyond you. As soon as the elevator doors shut, he was on you in a split second, pinning you against the metal wall of the elevator, hands on your hips as his lips moved fervently against yours.

The doors dinged, announcing the arrival to his floor and Jeonghan all but dragged you out of the lift, steering you down the hall to the door to his apartment. He fumbled with the key, unlocking it after a couple tries, only for you to pull him in, shutting the door behind you.

You stood in front of the door, lips locked, tongues battling for dominance as his hands roamed your body and yours grabbed the lapel of his black wool coat. “Wait,” he murmured, pulling back to look at you, pupils dilated even in the dark room.

“I can’t let this go on without your consent,” he murmured, lips ghosting along your jaw and down the side of your neck. “I’m here, aren’t I?” you asked softly. Jeonghan shook his head, straightening up to stare you down yet again. “No,” he replied.

“I mean, yes. Yes you are here. But I need to hear you say it.”

You rolled your eyes before pulling him closer, lips brushing against his and making him pout when you didn’t kiss him. “I want this,” you muttered, brushing your lips against his again, making him chase your mouth, desperate enough for your kiss that he whined.

“I want you, Yoon Jeonghan.”

Your words had a profound effect on him and he groaned, backing you into the wall beside the front door.

“I’m sorry,” you heard him murmur, his body pressing you against the wall. “I’m so, so sorry.” You shook your head, tugging on his hair to make him pull back and look at you. “Don’t,” you said softly. “Don’t apologize. It doesn’t matter anymore,” you continued, looking up at him with glossy eyes. “You’re here now.” Jeonghan groaned, leaning back in, his lips crashing against yours.

You let out a groan as his hands moved down your body, fumbling to undo your coat. “I’m here,” he repeated, words muffled by your lips. “And I’m not going anywhere.” You shook your head as he failed to unbutton your coat. “Neither am I,” you replied.

Your hands replaced his, undoing the buttons one by one before you shrugged the coat off, letting it fall to the floor, leaving you in just the silver backless dress. Jeonghan grabbed your hips, spinning you away and pushing you against the wall, his hips pressing into your backside.

He slowly started to pull at the tie at the back of your neck, savoring the reactions your body gave him. He paused, lowering his head to press his lips against your shoulder, lips parting as he let his tongue glide over your skin before sinking his teeth into you.

You let out an almost pornographic moan as he bit you, spurring on the rolling of his hips against your ass as he rutted against you. His fingers made quickly work of your halter, untying it before his hands slid down your back to grab your hips, the material of your dress bunching under his hands.

He spun you back around to face him before his hands moved up to where you held the dress up to cover your chest. “Don’t hide from me,” he murmured, leaning in to kiss you, his hands moving to yours and pulling them away. The top of your dress tumbled down, stopping at your waist.

His hands moved up, cupping your now exposed breast, sighing as you arched your back into his touch, your hands tangling in his dark locks. Jeonghan’s hands moved back down, pushing your dress further down as he littered kisses all over your neck and collar.

You allowed the item to fall to the floor, stepping out of it as Jeonghan pulled you from the wall. Your hands slid down his chest, working to undo his slacks and push them down, stumbling over a forgotten shoe and giggling as Jeonghan grabbed your waist to steady you.

“Careful,” he hissed as you stood up straight. “I really don’t want to spend Christmas in the ER.” You leaned into him, pulling him into a kiss. “I’ll be careful,” you promised as you leaned against the back of the couch. You grabbed his shirt, pulling it up over his head and dropping it to the floor to admire his lean body. “You’ve been working out,” you noted as his hands tugged at your shirt, pulling it up over your head as well.

“Well, it’s been a while since we’ve seen each other,” he reminded you. “I’ve been going to the gym for a while.” You giggled as he pulled you up into him, kissing you as his hands settled on your hips. “I don’t think we’re going to make it to the bedroom,” he murmured in between kisses. You shook your head.

“No,” you replied. “We’re not.”

You giggled as Jeonghan leaned forward, making you both tumble over the arm of the couch, him landing on top of you. “You didn’t think this through, did you?” you asked as you tried to scoot under him. He shook his head before pressing his lips against yours.

“When did I ever think anything through?” he asked with a smirk before sliding off you and the couch, moving to kneel in front of it. “Sit up,” he instructed. You scrambled to sit up, giggling as he grabbed your hips, pulling you to the edge of the couch. “Don’t tease,” you whined as he kissed up your stomach slowly.

“I’m not,” he pouted before his hands moved back up to your chest, settling under your breast as he searched your face for any sign of apprehension. When he saw none, he continued. A loud clunk made your head whip around in the direction it came from.

“Eyes on me, angel,” you heard Jeonghan say softly, taking your chin in his hand and turning your head to meet his burning gaze.

“Good girl,” he murmured. You opened your mouth to retort but let out a soft sigh as you felt his tongue lave over your nipple. His hands still on your hips as he nipped at and teased the bud. Your back arched, pressing your chest further against his face making him chuckle against your skin.

You felt one of his hands run up your back as the other stayed on your hip. “Not so mouthy now, are you?” you heard him murmur and looked down to meet his gaze once again. “No but you sure are,” you retorted, making him laugh as he pushed you back. His hands slid down your hips to your thighs, pulling your panties with them.

You lifted your feet as he pulled them off entirely and tossed them aside, hands moving under your hips to pull you closer to his face. “It’s been a while,” he admitted, glancing up at you as you reached down to comb your fingers through his dark tresses. “You never did this before,” you replied. “Not for me, anyway.” Jeonghan cocked his head. “You sure about that?” he asked and you nodded.

“I went down on you,” you reminded him. Jeonghan shrugged, grip tightening as he leaned in. Without another word, you felt his tongue lick slowly and glanced down at him, finding him already looking at you with hooded eyes. “Holy shit,” you gasped, the sight of him alone making your walls clench around nothing.

Jeonghan chuckled more to himself as he broke eye contact to look down at your heat. “Doesn’t take much, does it?” he asked, referencing your already leaking slit. “I barely touch you and your body is ready for something to fill it,” he added, one of his hands moving, fingers tracing around your entrance.

He looked back up, meeting your gaze as he slowly sank his fingers inside you, burying them to the hilt as his lips parted. “So tight,” he muttered, looking back down as he pulled his fingers slowly until just the tips remained. He gingerly pushed them back in, watching as your walls sucked them in.

“So warm,” he added. You groaned as you felt them curl inside you, brushing against the soft spongy spot that had your toes curling. “So wet for me,” he added with a hint of amusement to his voice. Even years later, he was still teasing you the way only he could.

His pace was slow, too slow to build any tension but just enough to give you some friction. He could do this for hours and you knew he could. Even if your previous encounter had been nothing but rushed and the very definition of a quickie.

It was amazing he still managed to tease you like this, working you up so well years later.

Like no time had passed and he was a skilled and practiced lover.

“Shit,” you gasped as Jeonghan’s fingers plunged deeper into your heat. “Don’t stop,” you gasped, your hand in his hair gripping tighter. You wanted to move his face closer, wanting to feel his tongue on you but he held back, reaching up instead to grab your hand and remove it.

“I’d love nothing more than to taste you,” he started. “But ever since you sat at my bar, I’ve wanted to fill this sweet pussy with my cock more.” You groaned as he pulled his fingers from your cunt, leaving you clenching around nothing with a whine.

“You want to be on top or you want me on top?” he asked as he wiped his fingers on the blanket that had fallen to the floor with a mental note to throw that in the washer tomorrow morning.

“Surprise me,” you said with a smirk.

The moment the words left your lips, you regretted them. Jeonghan had you pinned down against the cushions as he guided the head of his cock to your entrance. “Shit,” he cursed, hesitating. “I don’t have a condom on me,” he murmured. “They’re in the bedroom. I could go get one--”

You took his chin in your hand. “Are you clean?” you asked, looking into his eyes. He nodded fervently before asking you the same. You nodded, letting go of his face. “And I’m on the pill. Just do it. Before we lose the moment,” you replied.

Jeonghan said nothing, instead pushing into you, a deep groan leaving his lips as he slid in easily. You let out a whimper, head falling back against the cushion as his cock slowly stretched and filled your walls. The stretch was more than you remembered but it wasn’t painful.

When Jeonghan stopped moving, you heard him whisper a string of curses.

“When I said you were tight, I didn’t realize you were this tight,” he hissed. You hiked your leg higher, allowing him to sink deeper, making him shut up with a moan as his head fell into the crook of your neck. “Shit, okay,” he breathed, his breath hot against your skin, a thin layer of sweat starting to form.

“Can you move already?” you whined, trying to shift your hips but he put his weight down on you. “I’m trying not to cum, stop moving!” he hissed. You whined, body going still under him as you waited for him to regain his composure.

Watching the way his brow furrowed as he held off his own orgasm was kind of cute in a way. You took in the way his hair fell around his face, the ends with a slight curl. The long hair was growing on you.

“Alright,” he finally said, raising his head, sweat beading on his forehead. “I think I’m good.”

You opened your lips to respond but your words faltered as he pulled back and thrust sharply into you, making you gasp as your walls gripped him tightly. “If you keep doing that, I’m not gonna last,” Jeonghan groaned, hips stalling. “We’ve barely even started,” you whined, moving a hand up to brush his hair back.

“I underestimated you,” you heard him whisper as he buried his face in the crook of your neck. “Feels too good,” he added, his breath hot against your skin. “Jeonghan,” you whined impatiently. He groaned as he raised his head. “Fine, fine,” he murmured, pulling out to thrust back slowly, setting a steady pace.

“Fucking hell, Y/N,” he growled. You felt his fingers dig into your thigh, hiking your let up around his waist as he leaned deeper into his thrusts, the sound of skin against skin starting to fill the room. A thin layer of sweat started to cover your body, feeling equal parts sticky and wet.

Jeonghan pulled back to look down at you, his free hand moving to your face. “Don’t hold back,” he muttered, freeing your bottom lip from between your teeth as you had been holding back your moans. “There’s no one around to catch us this time,” he added with a smirk.

You let go, letting out a loud moan as you felt the head of his cock bump the soft spot inside your cunt. “Oh god,” you gasped, one hand moving to grab his arm, squeezing his bicep. Jeonghan took note of your facial expression and the fluttering of your walls and angled his thrusts, aiming for the same spot again and smirking wider as you gasped out again

“Right there, yeah?” he asked, his voice breathless. “Y-yeah,” you mewled, back arching as he hit the same spot repeatedly. “M’gonna cum if you keep doing that,” you whimpered, thighs squeezing his waist. Jeonghan surprised you by stopping completely, your orgasm ebbing away like the tide.

“What the fuck, Jeonghan?” you hissed as he pulled out of you completely. You tried to prop yourself up but squealed as he grabbed your arm, pulling you up and pushing you onto your stomach over the arm of the couch. You had no time to ask what he was up to when you felt him reenter you from behind, setting into a heavy and relentless pace immediately.

Your breath was knocked out of you with each powerful thrust, mewls and moans tumbling from your lips. “Oh, fuck, d-don’t stop,” you moaned, lips parted. Jeonghan growled, wrapping an arm around your chest and pulling your back against his chest.

“I should have had you like this before,” he whispered in your ear. “In my cabin. Not in some half rundown boathouse.” You let out a squeal as you felt Jeonghan’s cock plunge deeper into your cunt. “I shouldn’t have just left--”

“Stop,” you gasped. Jeonghan’s hips slowed. “No, don’t stop that,” you replied quickly. “I meant, stop talking about that.” You let out a moan as he resumed his merciless pace. “Right. We can talk later,” he groaned. “For now…” he trailed off, free hand slipping down between your thighs, fingers finding your clit with ease.

“I want you to cum,” he whispered in your ear. “Cum for me and then I’ll fill you up.”

Your walls clenched around him, your orgasm approaching as he drew you closer and closer with each thrust. “That’s it, come on,” he muttered. “Let go, angel.”

You let out a whine, feeling his hips stutter as you came, walls gripping him tightly. “Fuck, that’s right. Keep going,” he murmured, continuing to fuck you through your climax. “Good girl,” he said softly. You felt his grip relax, sighing in relief as he carefully set you back against the armrest, taking one of your arms and pinning it behind your back.

“Hold on tight,” he continued, his free hand gripping your hip, fingers digging into your flesh.

You didn’t get a word out before he started pounding into you, cries falling from your lips with each drag of his cock against your walls. “Fuck,” he hissed. You felt his cock twitch inside you, his own release drawing closer. “M’not gonna last,” he moaned, his grip on your arm tightening as he held you in place.

“Don’t stop,” you gasped, using your free hand to push yourself back against his thrusts. “Come on,” you continued. “Fucking cum.” Jeonghan let out a growl. “You want me to cum?” he asked. “Want me to cum inside you, claim this pussy as mine?” You nodded fervently. “Yes,” you replied. “Give it to me, please. Want it so bad!”

Your words seemed to do the trick, pushing Jeonghan over the edge as he came with a groan, hips coming to a halt as he buried his cock inside you, releasing deep into your cunt. “Shit!” he hissed. You pushed back, fucking yourself on his cock as he continued to pump you full of his cum.

“Shit, Y/N, stop,” he stammered, body twitching. “Fuck, babe, stop,” he repeated, letting go of your arm and holding your hips still. “Sorry,” you whimpered. “Felt too good.”

Jeonghan let out a breathless chuckle before leaning over your back, pressing a remarkably gentle kiss against your shoulder before pulling back and watching as he pulled his cock free. He leaned back to get a better look, almost smirking deviously as some of his cum started to spill out of you.

“Can I take a picture?” he asked suddenly, making your head snap up. “What?” you asked, looking back over your shoulder at him. “It’s just for me,” he added. “I want to remember this,” he continued, nodding down at your cunt. You contemplated it for a moment before nodding. “Yeah, go ahead.”

You felt him scramble off the couch, walking over to where his pants lay on the floor and pulled the device from his pocket, moving back behind you to presumably take a couple pictures.

You felt his hand on your ass, his thumb spreading your lips before his fingers moved, pushing into your cunt, making you groan. “What’re you doing?” you asked. “Pushing it back in,” he replied. “Some of it spilled out.”

You glanced back, seeing his phone still in his hand. “Are you filming this?” you asked softly and he nodded, tapping on the screen before setting his phone on the coffee table. “Sorry,” he added. “I couldn’t resist.” You caught an eyeful of his cock, standing proudly again.

“You wanna fuck it back into me?” you asked, making him look up to meet your gaze.

“Can I?” he asked, to which you nodded.

“Sure,” you replied. “It’s not like I’m going anywhere any time soon.”

You weren’t sure how you managed to go another two rounds with Jeonghan, each time ending with him filling you with even more of his cum but finally, he tapped out after moving to the bedroom to continue. You chose to hop in the shower, knowing his cum would slip out while you slept.

After cleaning up, you joined him back in bed and passed out.

The next morning, Jeonghan awoke to sunlight pouring into his room through the blinds and blinked himself awake. He rolled over, hand reaching for you but found the space you’d previously occupied empty. His heart skipped a beat, pounding in his chest as he sat up quickly, looking around.

‘Oh no,’ he thought as he scrambled out of bed, throwing off the covers. He was grabbing a clean pair of sweats when the smell of eggs met his nose. He pulled on his pants and walked over to the door that stood slightly ajar, pulling it open and stepping into the hall.

He padded down the hallway and into the living area where he found you, wearing one of his old oversized shirts as you stood at the counter. “Morning,” you said with a smile as you cooked. Jeonghan’s lips pulled into a crooked smile as he moved to sit at the kitchen island, watching you work.

“Why are you smiling at me like that?” you asked as you stirred the contents of the skillet. Jeonghan shook his head, resting his chin in his hand as he watched you. “Nothing,” he murmured. “I could just get used to this.”

“Used to this? What, me cooking?” you asked with a snort. Jeonghan nodded. “And seeing you in my clothes,” he added with a chuckle. You rolled your eyes as you started to plate the food. Jeonghan heard the sound of a key in the lock and internally panicked. You looked up at him with wide eyes.

“I thought you lived alone,” you said as he turned towards the door and watched in horror as the door opened and Seungcheol entered, dropping his bag by the door as he looked up at Jeonghan, excitement on his face. “You’re never going to guess what happened to me last night,” he said as he walked forward.

“We got drinks and then- oh!” Seungcheol started, pausing when he caught sight of you in the kitchen in Jeonghan’s shirt. “Hello!” he added, glancing between you and Jeonghan. “Who is this?” he asked, looking at Jeonghan whose cheeks started to grow warm. He’d been caught, metaphorically, with his pants down and now he was going to have to come clean to his best friend and roommate.

“This,” Jeonghan started, glancing at you and then back at his best friend. “Is Y/N.”

Seungcheol smiled, looking at you before the realization dawned on him and his eyes widened comically. “Oh! Y/N?” he asked, turning to Jeonghan. “Like… the Y/N?” Jeonghan glanced quickly at you, noticing your furrowed brows. “The Y/N?” you asked softly.

Jeonghan forced an awkward smile, turning to you. “How would you like to eat breakfast in bed?” he asked with a pointed look. You glanced between him and Seungcheol. “O-okay,” you said, looking every bit as confused as you sounded. Jeonghan motioned for you to pick up the plates, saying he would follow shortly.

He turned to Seungcheol as you headed for his room.

“Don’t touch the blanket or the couch,” he said quickly. “I have some cleaning to do,” he added, starting for his room before stopping to look back at Seungcheol who made a face of disgust as he looked at the couch. “We’ll talk later,” Jeonghan added, pointing at Seungcheol who nodded.

Back in his room, Jeonghan shut the door and moved to sit beside you on the bed.

“Sorry about that,” he murmured as he took a plate from you and started to dig in, complimenting your cooking skills. You thanked him as you finished your bite and swallowed. “So,” you started, gathering more eggs on your fork. Jeonghan looked up to meet your gaze, a smug smirk on your face.

“The Y/N?” you asked, a hint of amusement in your voice. 

“Just how many people have you told about me?”

ⓘ Graphics made by me. Content and support banners made using a template by cafekitsune. I do not allow reposts, translations, or continuations of my works. All writing and graphics are ©️ kwanisms.

[autolenaphilia]

Having comments and asks off makes my life so peaceful.

Like a lot of people who want to start shit on this site, they just wanna drop some one-liner in the comments or send an harassing ask, because that's the easy way compared to reblogs.

When you reblog something you disagree with a reply, you are expected to provide some substantive rebuttal to the OP, otherwise you might embarrass yourself in front of your followers who might agree with the OP instead of you.

Whereas comments are often one-line zingers, devoid of substance, and that's kinda expected by them. They are so easy to make in comparison. And if you get embarrassed in the "debate", your followers might very well never know.

And asks are great for harassment, because they can feel very personal, since only the person that got them can read them. And asks can be entirely anonymous, which makes them extra risk-free.

Comments and asks are therefore so useful for mobbing campaigns, they are easy to make, and if many people make them, they can give the illusion of substance because of sheer quantity.

And by turning them off, I've kinda stemmed the tide. It sucks that I had to restrict my engagement on the site like this, but the peace i get from it is great. And I imagine a lot of people are fuming about my posts that transandrophobia aren't real, but don't have the werewithal to actually like make a reblog reply to it, which makes them fume even more.

So i get very little disagreement to my posts, despite being a trans woman posting about transfeminism on the internet. The vast majority of reblogs are in agreement with me, which is nice. I've gotten my share of harassment, but I've felt that it's been limited, just by turning off asks and comments, and restricting messages to mutuals. I can go literally months without a negative reblog.

Of course, there is also the fact that I'm right, and that my logic is impeccable, you can't argue against me without looking like a fool. That's probably why so few people try. If you think I'm wrong, just reblog the posts you disagree with and try to rebut them without calling me names, like calling me a terf (i blocked like 2-3 people over that alone). I'll probably be waiting a long time.

[coraniaid]

A random ask if you're up for it: what's a terrible take about the Buffyverse you've seen on tumblr but have not yet publicly kvetched about?

I'll be honest: this question prompted a moment of minor panic on my part because my very first instinct was to say something like "hmm, no, I don't think I've ever seen a bad take about Buffy on here I've not immediately complained about". Which is an admission that, were it accurate, should probably prompt rather more introspection on my part than I'd enjoy.

Thinking about it though, I don't think that is really true. In fact, I probably don't say anything negative about most of the bad Buffy takes I see, either because they're not particularly widespread (I try not to publicly disagree with other people's headcanons or even argue against popular posts if it would be obvious who I was responding to) or because they're about characters who I just don't talk about on here at all (either because I don't find them interesting or because my understanding of them is so at odds with the wider fandom's we'd be talking at cross-purposes).

(Or, sometimes, I don't say anything negative because I'm too busy enthusiastically reblogging the post in question, if we're being brutally honest about what counts as a "bad take".)

One concrete example I don't think falls under those headings and which I don't remember complaining about before is the way people talk about Buffy's speech in Selfless. Now, I'll be honest: I don't really like Selfless that much. It's in the top half of Season 7 episodes for me, possibly even the top third, but that's a pretty low bar. But what I do like a lot are Buffy/Faith parallels, and this episode has a big one in Buffy's speech towards the end of the episode:

At some point someone has to draw the line and that is always going to be me. You get down at me for cutting myself off, but in the end the Slayer is always cut off. There's no mystical guidebook; no all-knowing council. Human rules don't apply. There's only me. I am the law.

Obviously this reminds the audience of Faith's similar speeches in Season 3's Consequences, when she tells Buffy that the two of them are "better" than ordinary humans and then later that "you know I'm right. You know in your gut we don't need the law. We are the law."

We obviously aren't meant to agree with Faith in Consequences. (The fact that she follows this speech up by almost immediately defecting to work for the Mayor, commiting at least one cold-blooded murder, having a sobbing emotional breakdown where she begs somebody to kill her and then turning herself in to be judged and punished by the very human laws she sneered at earlier is something of a clue.)

A lot of people point out the parallel but then try to explain that what Buffy is saying is actually substantially different from Faith, and that Buffy is right while Faith was wrong. in Myth, Metaphor and Morality Mark Field (who I don't think is actually on Tumblr, technically, but who I'm referencing to avoid talking directly about the many people on Tumblr who agree with him) ties this in to the wider themes of Season 7, and describes the difference between Buffy and Faith as being that Faith is trying to avoid responsibility (for accidentally killing Allan Finch) while Buffy is taking responsibility (for doing what has to be done and killing Anyanka).

And yes, Buffy is doing something different to Faith here. She is not trying to say that she doesn't have to be accountable. She is not making excuses for her own mistakes or bad behaviour. She is trying to do (what she perceives as being) the right thing.

But Buffy is wrong as well. She is proved wrong within this episode. She doesn't have to kill Anya: in fact, she fails to kill Anya (indeed, given what we see of vengeance demons in The WIsh and in Older and Far Away I don't believe Buffy could possibly have killed Anya, but I know that vengeance demon lore is even less rigorous than vampire soul lore). The problem of Anya being a vengeance demon is resolved, not by Buffy, but by the people she was giving her speech to. The people who she was arguing didn't have a say.

Buffy is wrong, too, within the show's established lore. There is a mystical guidebook (even if her Watcher didn't have her read it), and there is a Council (even if they're far from all-knowing, Buffy could have been making use of their resources ever since she asserted her importance to them in Checkpoint, but she chose not to do this). And Buffy isn't alone. (At least Faith got the number of Slayers right in her speech!)

And Buffy is also wrong in terms of the wider season arc. Season 7 is not about Buffy saving the day by heroically taking all the world's burdens on to herself and making all the decisions. Her attempts to beat the First this way end disastrously; cutting herself off from her friends and her family and the very the Potentials she's trying to protect.

(Yes, the climatic scene in Empty Places is poorly written, but the season does very deliberately have Buffy fail to establish any sort of rapport or connection with the Potentials and spend less and less time with her friends. Buffy isn't blameless for those relationships falling apart, even if having her friends and sister kick her out of her own house is absurd.)

Instead of being the lone voice of judgment, Buffy beats the First and saves the world by not isolating herself. By working with her friends; by realizing they can do things she can't; by sharing her power with the Potentials (because "my power should be our power"); by reconnecting with Faith; by accepting help from Angel and from Spike; and by realizing that the people who "made up the rules" for Slaying thousands of years ago made a mistake.

The whole point of Chosen is that it is a refutation of the vision of being a Slayer that Buffy outlines in this episode.

Quoting it uncritically as if it sums up who Buffy is as a person is like, well, using Andrew's speech about "the Dark Slayer" to describe Faith. (Which ... oh, yeah, people also do.)

[wsdanon]

hmmm mike and felps bonding perhaps? For wip game?

okay you know what you can have my whole wip for this fic \o/! i'll put it under the cut--it's supposed to end with mike helping felps dye his hair and them talking about things other than just pac but pac is a focal point of this first bit here

(context is: this is a few years after fuga where they've met up again and are on good terms, but it's maybe still a little shaky)

since this is a solid amount of words despite being a wip, reblogs are appreciated \o/

"Would you keep a secret from Pac for me?" Felps asks.

"No." Mike doesn't even need to think about it. "Probably not."

"Hm. Okay." Felps nods to himself, like this is what he expected. "Would you… not tell him something for me, then?"

This makes Mike set down what he was messing with. He turns to Felps. Who looks nervous.

"What do you mean?"

"Like… if he doesn't ask, you don't tell?"

Mike does have to think about this one. He draws his consideration away from where his and Pac's thoughts usually mingle, and Pac sends him a curious feeling, but doesn't prod.

"Sure." He settles on, turning back to his project. "But keep in mind, he'll probably ask."

"Okay."

Felps doesn't say anything else. But he doesn't leave, either. Mike looks up at him again.

"So… were you going to tell me something?" He prods, and Felps sighs defeatedly.

"Yeah, okay." Another sigh. "I really like Pac."

"Well, I'd hope so." Mike frowns. "I thought we were all friends at this point."

"We are." Felps confirms, as he rests his chin on his palm--his elbow propped up on the table. And his expression is troubled, but there's something else to it--a combination Mike sees on Pac frequently. Things click into place. "But I really like Pac."

"Oh, you mean romantically?"

"Yeah." Felps shifts his hand in an attempt to cover his face, but his blush still shines through. Mostly because Mike is looking for it. "I think so."

"Huh. You know, I thought you and Cell were--" Mike cuts himself off as the embarrassment on Felps' face quickly disappears and gives way to disinterested surprise. His eyebrows raise, while his hand shifts again--falling into a thoughtful position. Mike continues, "Well, I guess I'm the last person who should be making those kinds of assumptions, huh?"

"We are kind of like you and Pac." Felps agrees.

But he doesn't sound committed to the idea, so Mike silently disagrees. Besides, no one can be like him and Pac--they literally share a brain.

"So, you and Cell aren't dating, and you like Pac romantically." Mike recaps.

"I think so?"

The question in his response has Mike briefly looking down at his project in despair. He's not getting this done any time soon.

Pac prods at him, confused, and Mike waves him off. He wants to at least try to honour Felps' request, and that means he can't have Pac stumbling across his thoughts right now in an attempt to see if he's okay.

"Why did you come to me for this?" Mike asks. "I'm shit with romance."

"And you think Cell would be better?"

"Okay, good point." Then he frowns. "Wait, hold on. Wasn't Cell exes with some of the guys in prison? JV and Guaxinim, at least, right?"

"Mike," Felps says with a tone that he's about to say something obvious, "I'm not going to tell Cell I'm into his ex."

"Pac and Cell aren't…" He trails off. Even with the link between them now, Mike isn't sure what Pac and Cell are, let alone what they aren't. Which is mostly because their relationship is so confusing Pac himself isn't even sure. "Whatever, that's not the point. I just don't know what you expect me to do."

"Nothing." Felps picks at the peeling paint on the table absently. "I just wanted to tell someone."

Felps seems kind of in despair, too, right now. So, Mike forgives him for interrupting his workflow, and attempts to throw him a bone.

"Look, I'll try and keep this from getting to Pac." Mike offers. "But, like…" He taps at his head.

"Yeah, I get it." Felps smiles at him. "Thanks."

There's a high chance that Felps becomes Pac's crush for the month, and Mike can do a bit of matchmaking. Or, equally as likely, someone else will catch Felps' eye and it won't matter anymore. Either way, Mike would say he only has a month tops to keep his promise.

Which is… manageable. Maybe. He doesn't try to keep things from Pac often.

"If Pac started dating me… would I be dating you, too?" Felps asks, drawing little lines with his finger on the table to demonstrate the connection.

And the honest answer is yeah, probably. For all intents and purposes. But people don't always really like that answer.

"I mean… kinda? If you're okay with that?" Mike shrugs. "I don't know, man, it wouldn't be the same thing."

"That sounds cool."

And he sounds genuine. Mike goes back to his project, but he doesn't get too into it in case Felps wants to continue the conversation.

"Can I paint your nails?" Felps asks.

And, okay, not what he was expecting.

"I'm kind of doing something." Mike says, gesturing to the project. "Maybe, uh… later?"

"I have green."

Felps pulls out a bottle of nail polish, and sets it on the table between them. Mike stares at it. It is indeed green--a nice bright green.

"Okay, sure."

"Nice!"

Mike moves his project to the side, and holds his hands out. Felps' hands are warm. The nail polish isn't.

He's quick in his movements, but focused fully on his task. Mike lets his fingers be moved for better angles, and shakes his hand to dry it when Felps starts on the other.

"So, what are you making?" Felps asks.

"Something to help with the mobility for Pac's prosthesis." He wants to gesture around and explain the mechanics, but he doesn't think Felps would get it, and his nail polish is still too wet for him to feel comfortable touching things. "Once I get this right, I'll probably try to open up shop for custom orders. Then hopefully we won't need to rob banks for more money."

"Aw." Felps pouts. "But robbing banks is fun."

"Weren't you a cop?"

"I was a prison guard." Felps shrugs. "And that was just so I could hang out with Cell after he got arrested."

Mike laughs.

"And then he killed you."

Felps' hands twitch like a mostly contained flinch.

"It wasn't my favourite time with him, no."

"Sorry."

"It's fine."

"It wasn't my favourite time with him, either."

This time Felps laughs.

"No, I guess not."

He finishes up the last nail, and packs the polish away. Mike kind of misses the casual intimacy of it, but shakes his hands out to try and dry the nail polish quicker.

"You know, Pac falls for people pretty easily." Mike says. "If you flirt with him, he'll probably reciprocate."

"Oh, thank you, but I don't really mind." Felps shrugs. "I just like being around him."

"Me too."

--

And this is where I got to \o/ I've had this written up for ages, but I've never had time and motivation to go back and finish it oops. hope you enjoyed!

[noperopesaredope]

Disclaimer: I barely know what I'm talking about. I'm just putting some thoughts out there because I'm honestly confused about some things. These are the words of someone who can barely understand what anyone is saying and also trusts no one on the internet. I've accepted that I am too stupid to understand this conflict and no matter how much research I try to do, I will never understand any of it. Believe me, I have tried. These are the ramblings of a confused idiot who is out of the loop on everything and will never really be in the loop.

You can add your own thoughts or disagree. But don't yell at me for my thoughts. I've tried to educate myself, but that has failed. But I still want to throw some thoughts into the discussion using my limited understand of everything. I will likely be turning off notifications to this post if too many people shout at me for not understand shit or agreeing with them, so probably don't try to change my mind. Just say what you want to say and add your own essays in the reblogs.

~~~~~~~~~

I've been trying not to say too much about the Israel-Palestine conflict (not just Gaza, but in general) since it's so complicated and messy and I'm not informed enough on another country's massive, decades-long conflict for me to feel comfortable commenting on it. However, I have had a little nugget in my brain that has been bothering me for a while now. A common Zionist argument I occasionally see is that Palestinians aren't actually "indigenous" to the region of Israel-Palestine, and that they are invaders. They came from somewhere else to live in that area, and therefore aren't "the true people of Israel." But I find this argument rather silly and a bit hard to believe.

First off, and I'm not even saying this as an argument against Israel, but isn't the whole point of Jewish mythology (mythology is the technical term) that Israel is "the Promised Land?" As in, the end point? The final destination rather than the start? Maybe I'm confused and need to brush up on Jewish mythology, but from what I remember, the Hebrews came from a different region in the Middle East, then migrated to the region where Israel is. Therefore, they didn't exactly "originate" from there either.

It's also kind of hard to believe that there weren't already other people who were living there already. And then Abraham and his family moved to Egypt anyways due to drought, and the Hebrews were there for hundreds of years before coming back to Israel. And by the time they'd come back, a bunch of other ethnic groups had already made their homes in Israel, as people had been doing likely long before Abraham and his family first came to the region.

And even if Abraham and his family originally came from that region, Abraham already lived in civilization. Civilization still existed there, and people were still living there. Abraham was basically part of a different ethnic group before he created the Hebrews. Therefore, the Hebrews would be from Israel, but so would all of the other people already living there who weren't descendants of Abraham.

Whether or not you believe that the region belonged to the Hebrews by the will of God, all those other mfs were still living there first. You can say that you own the land because God said so, but you can't truthfully say that all the people who were there before Abraham was even born are not native to the region.

Even if we're not looking at Biblical accounts, realistically discussing archaeology and patterns throughout history leads us to the conclusion that there was no singular native ethnic group in Israel.

It is well known that Israel has had, like, hundreds of different peoples who have lived there at different points throughout history. It has switched around a lot of times, and has definitely had multiple ethnic groups living there at the same time. It is a region that has historically been diverse, and many have called it home.

On top of that, who is to say that Palestinians aren't actually also natives to that region? I've heard some people say that the Palestinians are decended from Arabs who invaded the region, but is it really true that all of them are of Arab decent? Again, this area is incredibly diverse, and I'm pretty sure it was ethnically diverse even before Israel was founded. It's unlikely that

Also, haven't the Palestinians been living there for thousands of years anyways? Because in that case, I'd say it's questionable to declare a pretty diverse group of Middle Eastern brown folks to not be native to a region they have been living in for hundreds/thousands of years.

Especially when a large number of those who moved to Israel when it was founded (refounded?) back in 1948 were of white European decent. I believe that Israel is still the homeland of the Jewish people, but is a white Jewish person whose family has been living in Europe for hundreds of years really more native to the Middle East than a brown person whose family has been living in Palestine for hundreds of years?

Like, I see these white ass mfs sitting here saying "I belong here more than you" to these brown people who have been there for generations. This statement is not about Jewish folks who have been living in the Middle East for generations, mainly just those of European decent who declare that the land belongs to them more than those who have been there forever.

I still believe that the Hebrews should be considered "indigenous" to Israel, but to say that they are more indigenous seems disingenuous when both groups migrated to the region. No one group has ever been the true native group of that area, and I feel that either side arguing that the other is not native to the region is full of shit.

We don't know who is native to the region. We barely even know if Israelis and Palestinians each are made of singular ethnic groups. So I feel like declaring the "One True Indigenous Group" is pointless and redundant to the discussion. Either both are or neither are. Shut the fuck up.

[yooniesim]

OK so I agree completely with what Rheall said in that post that no one is above anyone in this community and I get the clique is an illusion sentiment. But you have to admit that when the smaller simblrs watch “Bruce the Dolphin” go round and round the same 30 people what are they supposed to think? Or when they watch simblrs with higher notes re-blog only from other simblrs with the same amount of notes.

We tell them to reblog and interact because you know the more popular simblrs are the same as us but I just think maybe sometimes all of us can do better at cultivating this community. It is nice to reblog posts saying everyone here is valid but how many put that sentiment really into practice?

Well except for the black simblr community. Y’all already do this. Whether someone in large or small, young or old, vanilla or alpha (and everything in between) they are welcomed. Replies and asks are answered and smaller simblrs are reblogged and shouted out. The rest of the community could really take some notes.

Sorry I have been in this community for a long time and just had to to get this off my chest. You don’t even need to reply if you don’t want to. Hopefully you are having a great day even with my word vomit!

Yeah, I do agree with this too nonny (which is why I added some additional tags on that post).

I'm not gonna put words in her mouth or anything cos I can't say, but it felt like maybe she was describing some of the better parts of this community? When you don't interact with or just block certain blogs, your time here gets exponentially better in my experience, it becomes a lot closer to the ideal. But that also goes along with what she said about trying your best not to focus on the notes. Because the fact of the matter is, a lot of the really bigger blogs are kind of assholish, and if you really want a lot of notes regularly you gotta kiss tip to stay in their circle (or somewhat adjacent) and not ostracized/hit with the chain block. And the people that really care about notes will stay walking on eggshells to stay there no matter what happens which creates that toxic, clique-like environment imo. This goes for both of the bigger chunks of the community which I tend to separate between cc makers and non-cc makers in my head. That's just how it is and I don't think that's going to change.

In reality, I think making your experience here better is a mix of the two ideas. Following Rheall's advice is a really good idea and I highly encourage it. But also, you do have to be a little picky about who you interact with in the first place. This is why I'd actually encourage talking a lot to people that are smaller rather than trying to aim for people with huge followings. They're more likely to be friendly and willing to encourage you and spread your posts, and you can gain awesome friends that way. They're less likely to be focused on popularity and more likely to say what they really think. Yes, no one here on simblr is better than anyone else, we're all the same- but some people do think they are better than everyone else, sadly. There's some big egos and nasty souls in this community that simply aren't worth getting wrapped up in, even if they treat you nice for a minute or get you some extra notes. I'm not going to say notes don't matter, we all know they do; but what I'm saying is, I'd rather some real genuine comments from my mutuals than a thousand silent reblogs from people that don't give 1 shit about me, you know? Or a reblog from someone that would turn around and blast me with waves of anon hate cos I disagreed with them. It's not worth it.

Instead, you have no choice but to work hard to cultivate your community for yourself. That includes a) what Rheall mentioned, reaching out to others and being kind, and b) blocking those that display the behaviors you mentioned above. Because you can't make the mistake of expecting them to change- they won't. If I see someone only reblogging from the same people & the same 500+ note posts over and over again, ignoring people in the comments and only speaking to the same people, and constantly circlejerking to nauseating amounts, I just block them. If I see a huge creator that only posts their paywalled cc, never interacts, and ignores the people using & gushing over their content, I block them. And what seems like closing a door is actually opening another. Even now, simblr is a big place, and blocking those blogs won't shut you off from the best part of it. It just blocks that behavior from your view and allows other simblrs and subsets of our community to shine.

I think why black simblr is so good at this is the fact that we are a smaller section of the community, relatively. It's more niche and tight-knit, and there's also a variety of tags you can use to find more. And while some of this section is fairly large (I would say more medium size follower wise), you will notice that most of the super big simblrs are not black simblrs. Or at least, don't interact as much with that subset of the community. You also notice this with most of the big cc creators being non-black as well. (I actually think black simblr is often used as a talking point for more notes at best or punching bag at worst for a lot of big simblr, but that's another discussion entirely.) Common niches will always stick together and promote better in simblr, whether that's based on race or by common interests, such as royal simblrs, simblrs that like kpop, etc. Find simblrs that are similar to you, and that can very well be a launching point to being part of a community you didn't even know was there.

I feel like I'm repeating myself a bit, but what I take away from the discussion as a whole, is not that notes don't matter. Not caring about them can be really hard, that's valid and makes perfect sense for all of us. But more that, what you have to do to get them quickly and consistently, what you have to do to stay there, and the toll on your mental health because of it is not worth it. I have interacted with all kinds of simblrs here in my time, big and small, and a lot of what you see at the perceived "top of the top" is just ugly. There's a lot of jealously, resentment, contempt, and burn-out brewing up there, usually built up from sitting in that same place for years. There's a sense of bitter cynicism that leaves a bad taste in your mouth just from being around it. And it's very easy to get sucked into that and the negativity too, I know that myself. Even though some may joke or mock anyone for talking about it and brush it off as being not that deep or whatever, it's true. It's really not a place or mindset you want to be in.

Apologies for word vomiting back at you so badly lol, but I'll try to wrap it up now. I just really think that, while I wish the dynamics of simblr would change as a whole, that just isn't going to happen. The Reblog Debate comes up every half a year and every time everyone says the same thing and the bigger simblrs cat fight with the smaller simblrs and the vague posts fly out by the thousands and nothing changes either way. The only solution is, honestly, to just aim low and find a few good mutuals here and that's it. Anything more, well, that's a pleasant surprise- right?

[inkovert]

Spilled Ink Session 1 discussion -continued

So I just read @freedominique's response to the session 1 prompt and I think you made a ton of good points that I want to discuss further. The post was getting long already so I figured I'd make a fresh post to discuss and reblog to our hearts content.

I'm just going to copy paste some points you put in bold and address them one by one to make this a bit more organized.

The film industry's promise of revenue and attention potentially encourages writers to undermine and neglect exploring the strengths of their own medium to try to better fit the demands of the silver screen.

Nothing to add to this; this was my exact point about the harm of the pipeline. Not necessarily that it exists, but that it could inevitably have negative consequences for the future of literature. My friend just told me something interesting the other day about how Reese Witherspoon gets the future rights to turn your book into a movie or TV show if it ends up as one of her Book Club picks (ofc with the author's agreement). Now, as you've alluded to, it's unlikely that the books she chooses aren't at least of decent quality (though that can be its own separate debate). It seems, as far as I can tell, that Reese is interested in putting forward strong, well-written stories told by female authors and wouldn't choose a book that wasn't (to her) well crafted and could stand on it's own. But I'm more so pointing out this paradigm of the fact that authors may cater to this business model to the detriment of their own medium. Because Reese is making billions off doing this. So what happens when that faceless greedy capitalist figure sees how profitable this pipeline is and doesn't necessarily have the same care or consideration for selecting strong, well-crafted stories? The film industry is simply concerned with whatever sells.

I'm not concerned that novels which resort to stage-direction style writing (to win over the movie industry) will take over the market because I'm sceptical of their appeal

This is where I have to disagree a bit. And I will link this post as sort of a thesis statement of my point (that post also touches on something that will be discussed in a future session so I will try not to get too off the rails). Books of, arguably, not great quality are already being published at high frequency, gaining a ton of traction among readers and in turn being turned into tv shows/movies. Where I will strongly agree with you is that Hollywood isn't entirely to blame and I wasn't trying to imply that. As the post I linked above stated, and as you also stated, the problem starts in the publishing industry and with us. The types of books that are being pushed to the forefront in social media circles fuels what publishing industries choose to pump out to the masses for maximum profit and creates this vicious cycle. Add in another large capitalist corporation such as the film industry to that mix? It only worsens the issue. So my disagreement is simply that the appeal for these low quality stories is already live and present. And that's my worry. That more of these low quality books will be produced and pushed to the forefront for the benefit of these corporations (and the author - Witherspoon Book Club picks are said to sell 700% better than other fiction books and all of them have at least sold 10k copies), thereby diluting the nuanced, introspective craft that is literature.

At the end of the day, we, too, as writers/authors want to make money (I'm talking specifically about writers who want to pursue publishing, which I know isn't every writer's goal). And as much as we love writing and storytelling and bringing worlds and characters to life, when you decide to make writing your full-time job and enter the query trenches where you're being faced with rejection after rejection or poorly selling books, and you see books of objectively not good quality selling better and being embraced by the masses, with those authors getting tv/movie deals and being better compensated*...wouldn't it be tempting to just...pivot and shift your standards a bit to cater to what's working/will help you survive?

Now, I will say that my views on the issue are not all negative (as this whole discourse series is meant to point out - nothing is black and white!). I think @that-chibi-writer brought in a very interesting/refreshing perspective with their response that I really liked and I also alluded to it at the end of my first response. When done well (with a strong story to begin with by an author who cares about the process of storytelling, an author who is heavily involved in the tv show/film making process etc), a book-to-screen adaptation can be magnificent, not only enhancing the way readers experience the story but also "deepen[ing] the actual content of the film industry by making the content richer and more diverse in a lot of different ways." (@that-chibi-writer). Dominique, I think it makes total sense for you to pursue making your book a film/tv show. You don't even have to justify doing that because I'm not making a case that doing so is inherently bad. I know you'd prioritize honoring the medium of literature first over catering to a business, and as you said you want to deepen the reader's experience of your story by not limiting it to just a print format/medium. If that were the motive of every author, I wouldn't have an issue. My issue just stems from the industry (publishing, film, whatever) exploiting the vulnerability of authors (especially debut authors) and making them think they have to write their story a certain way to survive as an author. I just hate that mindset being pumped into the literary scene, and given the current dumpster fire that is the gateway to publishing at the moment (book banning, the booktokification of books etc), I just worry about the effects that may manifest years from now.

*I don't pretend to know what the actual numbers on all of this are. It could very well be that authors who have their shows made into some form of screen adaptation aren't well compensated for that. But they do receive something from it that, in my mind, is priceless - exposure. Gaining an audience, selling book copies, is becoming more and more about exposure and how you market yourself, and a tv show/film is helping you do that on a much larger scale than your own personal social media account.

[cosmicjoke]

I barely know what happened with qafi so I'm not pretending to know better but I'd like to know why did you still put qafi's name in your new post if qafi asked you to not put your answer on their post? I understand that it's frustrating to be asked not to engage if you have something to say about it, but also you have a rather agressive way to answer (which is fine, you do you) and some people come to tumblr to have very casual conversations and don't want it to become a stressful place, while still engaging... You may not agree with them, but you also didn't really say anything to point out what is interesting about their take, just what you think was wrong... like qafi's take was purely bad reading and no interesting thoughts...

Also I'm under the impression that you kinda misread it. Qafi said they were talking about Levi as a narrative tool, while you talk about him much more like a person. Like when you say they were blaming Levi for how things eventually turned out with Eren, I don't think there's any blaming in what they say, they just say that the way the story turned out, Levi's choices ended up not being the ones that spared the more lives but not as in "he made bad choices" but just... "the story turned it that way". Your take is also interesting, I think you both had interesting things to say!

So people know what I was talking about and also because I was pissed. There was also nothing aggressive about my initial answer to them. I was just trying to have a conversation, and they could have simply ignored what I said if they didn’t want to “discuss it”, as they put it. But instead they told me to delete it, all while having no issue with engaging with other posters who disagreed with them. How do you think that looks?

There wasn’t anything I agreed with in qafis post, so I don’t know why I would be obligated to talk about what I found interesting about it. I chose to focus on what they said about Levi personally, and what was motivating him, because that was my largest, central issue with what they said. I could have talked about why I didn’t agree with their take in a broader sense, as in narratively, which I did in further discussion on my own post, if you want to read it. About why singling Levi out in that regard is odd, and also why it’s a moot point they were making, because Eren truly was their only option. There was no other course anyone in the story could have taken with the limited knowledge they had. Calling anyone a “failure” in that context is unfair and needlessly negative. I also think it’s a basic misreading of Levi’s character to say he wanted to “save” people. Levi was well aware that he couldn’t save the lives of the people around him, and he accepted that. Of course he wanted them to live, and did what he could to keep them living, but he also knew it was their choice to sacrifice their lives for a cause and it wasn’t his place to interfere with that choice. So to then use this idea of Levi only fighting to save lives to frame how they thought he was a failure was, I thought, a bad take, because it necessarily paints all of Levi’s actions as misguided or wrong.

Levi wanted to help people. He wanted to support them in whatever ways he could. In that regard, he didn’t fail at all. He helped countless people, and also, subsequently, saved many lives.

If qafi wanted to adddress any of that with me, they could have. But instead they decided to tell me they didn’t only not want to engage with me, but sent me the message they didn’t want my name associated with their post at all. It pissed me off, and yeah, including qafis name on my post was petty of me, I’ll admit it. But I also think they deserved it for being petty themselves to begin with. If you don’t want people engaging with your posts, all you have to do is turn off reblogs. But clearly that wasn't the issue for them, I was. They just didn't want me, specifically, engaging with their post. I’d never had any previous issue with this person, other than them one time accusing me of accusing them of being an eruri, when I’d never even mentioned the term in the post they were referring to, so that was pure bullshit. They constantly commented on my posts, and I never told them they couldn’t, or asked them to remove their replies, and instead always engaged them back. So… I think I had a right to be pissed.

[miralines]

Before I say anything, I just want to inform you that I just randomly came across your post browsing the discourse tag for something else. I don't know who you are nor what's happening with ao3 users here. I don't know if you wanted a deep(ish)dive into someone's thoughts and reasons for choosing fics based on kudos and hits ratio, but 100% ignore if you didn't! Sorry if I am intruding by doing this!

I come from multiple giant fandoms and when there are multiple fic choices with tags and summaries that I like, I do choose to go by kudos and hits ratio. Just to pick which one to check out first. I did notice however, that in smaller fandoms or tags this couldn't be applied because there's not enough fics, so I just read what I'm interested in most.

Why? Kudos signify how enjoyed the fic is to me, because usually the more kudos it has the more talked about it is on other platforms. Why would that be important? It's just that I enjoy exploring content made by others after I'm up to date with a fic. It's really fun to see people talk, theorize, make art and speculate or scream over things that will or did happen. It's giving me an opportunity to find people with similar interests and see what they make overall!

Sometimes though, if fic in a fandom or a tag that's incredibly popular gets hundreds of hits and very few kudos, I choose not to read it. This is based on a few bad experiences I had giving those fics a chance, where something in them made me uncomfortable or hard to read. I don't have any very specific needs when I'm reading fics, I just enjoy reading as a part of enjoying the fandom, so when I see the general readers avoid giving kudos in fandoms where it's very usual to have a lot on fics, I don't want to read that fic for my enjoyment.

I really don't know much about this, I'm sorry! But yeah, I basically use kudos to hits ratio to oriantate myself and avoid something I wouldn't like based on previous correlations I made. I don't know if that's wrong or upsetting for others, but if you find it that way, I would like to know why too and improve! Sorry for any grammatical mistakes I made!

Oh hi anon! I wasn’t expecting anyone to reach out like this, but thank you for taking the time to write out your thoughts! (Also. Please do not feel the need to apologize for grammatical mistakes. I do not believe in ‘correct’ grammar; as long as I understood you, which I did, I think you’re absolutely fine and using language as it’s intended!) (I am. A particular kind of nerd and not policing grammar is something I have Opinions about hence this tangent lmao)

This got terribly long, so I’ve put a tldr above the cut and divided the rest under headers for ease of reading.

Tldr: I see your points with regard to differences between large and small fandoms, and with the specific goal of finding “sub-fandoms” for particular fics. I still disagree that kudos-to-hits ratio is the best way to decide what fics to read, both because it isn’t an accurate metric of engagement and because I dislike the idea of using engagement as the primary metric in the first place. When I use A03, I prefer to sort by what’s recent and use the tags and summary to decide what to read, or to use the (excellent) search function to find what I’m looking for specifically.

I’d also like to note to anyone else reading: I doubt this will be an issue, but if anyone is rude to anon I’m going to turn off reblogs on this post. I know this is something some people feel strongly about, and discussion is fine, but this is absolutely not worth being mean to another human about.

Size of fandom

To begin my more thorough response: This is an interesting perspective– not one I entirely agree with, but I can certainly see how in larger fandoms with a lot more content it would be valuable to be more selective. For context, my main fandom is an obscure storytelling band with under 3k total works on A03, and these days I mostly occupy a niche of that fandom (one specific album) with only 128 works. The largest fandom I’ve been active in currently has 37k works on A03.

I don’t know what your fandoms are, but as some examples of bigger fandoms, Star Trek currently has over 100k works, Supernatural has almost 300k, and Harry Potter has nearly 500k. That is a big difference! I’m currently working on a goal to read every fic in my 128-fic niche (with some exclusion criteria), but in larger fandoms it’s impossible not to be selective. This is all to say– I definitely agree with you that the size of a fandom impacts how a person can and does interact with it.

Fans of fics

Your point about wanting to interact with other fans of a particular fic also makes sense! There was a particular fic series in my largest fandom that had a pretty decent following, and I still have friends from that sub-fandom several years later. If this metric helps you find fics that match your goal of having that experience, I can see how the kudos-to-hits ratio could function as a potentially useful metric, though I still think its usefulness is a bit limited for reasons I’m about to go into.

Kudos-to-hits isn’t accurate

I have two reasons for thinking that kudos-to-hits ratio isn’t the best way to determine what to read. The first is purely numerical. If you’ve been watching this discourse, you’ve probably already seen people discussing how users can only leave a single kudos, but may be responsible for 20-plus hits on a work. This is especially applicable to multichapter works, which in my experience are the fics that are able to develop their own following. If you want to sort fics by engagement, it seems like at the very least, using comments for the ratio is a more accurate measurement.

Using engagement as a metric at all

Secondly, though, I (and I believe, a lot of people) dislike the notion of using engagement as a metric to measure fics in the first place. I think the current discourse is partially due to some regrettable phrasing on the part of the OP of the post I was vaguing– if I recall correctly, they said that they use this metric to determine if a fic is “worth reading”. I think this phrasing was hurtful to a lot of fic writers who may not have large followings or a lot of engagement, but who work very hard on their fics and feel frustrated that this person implied that they aren’t worth reading. I have fics that are personal favorites of mine, but that I haven’t gotten a lot of feedback on.

Of course, this is just part of writing, and it’s an important skill for any writer (of fic or anything else) to learn to handle rejection or just lack of feedback. But I also think that particular post was phrased in a thoughtless way that interacted poorly with pre-existing insecurities (this is part of why I suggested that post was bait– the phrasing seems to me like a perfect storm to make writers upset and defensive, but of course this could also be due to the OP just being a bit careless with their words, and not expecting to have hit quite nerve they did).

There’s an excellent post here on engagement on fics and what a realistic assessment of “successful” engagement metrics are based on professional standards (which includes a stat about how Harry Styles, one of the most popular and successful current celebrities, only gets a 1:30 ratio of likes to views on his social media. I don’t know what ratio you’re using, but iirc the post I was discussing suggested 1:10). Personally, though, I worry about both authors and readers depending too much on statistics, especially in a broader cultural context when it feels like everything is performed, measured, and monetized. Most social media platforms have gone from a place to share with friends to a place to compete for attention and make money and fame off it. There’s a lot of cultural anxiety around that at the moment, which is another reason I think this discussion has gotten so big.

Why I disagree with using engagement

I think this discussion, at its heart, is a debate about what fandom should be, and I feel focusing overmuch on engagement statistics contributes to a fandom culture uncomfortably close to the commercialization of everything else on the internet. I feel that fic should be enjoyed as art (whatever art means) and not as a product. I’m not saying you’re personally approaching fic that way, but unfortunately there does seem to be something of a broader trend towards that, which troubles me.

As a writer, I would hope that when people come across my fic, they give it a chance based on the metatext information I give them in the tags and summary, the quality of my writing, and whether my work matches what the reader is looking for. Judging it based on the numbers feels reductive to me, and makes me feel like nothing about the work or passion I put in matters; just the popularity. My fics aren’t going to be for everyone, and I understand that. If someone comes across my fic and decides they’re not interested, that’s their prerogative. But I hope that potential readers don’t discount my work just because it doesn’t meet a numerical standard that, in my opinion, is extremely arbitrary.

My suggestions for what to do instead

As a reader, I default to sorting by what’s been posted recently, and then using the tags and summary to decide what to read. That’s what those things are designed to be used for, and I think they’re much more informative than the stats. Worst-case scenario, I start reading and then go back to the search. All I’ve lost is a couple minutes.

In large fandoms, this might be an inefficient way to search for fic, and I recognize that. I’d encourage you to try using A03’s (fantastic) search function to find what you’re looking for– you can both include and exclude fandoms, characters, pairings, and tags. I have come across people who don’t realize that A03 has no algorithm, and haven’t realized they need to learn to use the search function. This is understandable, given the state of most of the internet and what these (often young) fans have learned to use before, but I think learning to search and filter is a vital skill to develop. I have no idea if you’re in this boat, anon, but if you are, please check out the search. It is, in my experience, the best way to find what you’re looking for on A03, and can at the very least supplement numbers-based selection.

Conclusion

I don’t think you have a moral responsibility to stop using engagement as a way to determine what you want to read. Frankly, this isn’t that important. I don’t think you even strictly need to stop using kudos as the measure instead of comments, though I think that would be more accurate if you do prefer to sort by engagement. But I do think you could be surprised at the hidden gems you could find if you didn’t limit yourself to only reading fics with high ratios. I don’t know the nature of your bad experiences in the past, and obviously how you use A03 is up to you. But I think there are better ways to decide what to read.

Thank you again for reaching out– you’ve helped me understand the other perspective as well! I really do appreciate your explanation. I hope I’ve been as respectful as you have, and that I’ve helped you understand where writers who share my opinion are coming from. If you’d like to continue talking about this or respond to any of my points, please feel free to shoot me another ask or a message. I hope you’re doing well and that you have a nice day!

[liaromancewriter]

I agree with you one hundred percent and do the same as far as taking people off my tags if they do not interact. And I’m not talking about those who are behind and are getting caught up, but specifically the ones who I see constantly reading and reblogging others but ignoring the tags from me that they asked for. And some I’ve taken off have responded to a taglist update months later and asked to “stay on” when they haven’t been on in a while so they weren’t even tagged in the update, or they asked to be put back on, but then they turned around and did the same thing. I personally find it extremely rude to ask to be on someone’s taglist just to ignore said tags while actively reading and reblogging others. And I’ve seen some people say stuff like “well it only takes a second to activate someone’s tag, it’s not that big of a deal.” It only takes a second to hit the like button, too.

I’d love to know why people do this though and think that it’s okay, and I’d love to know what other writers think as well. Someone should do a poll since they’re anonymous.

💯. I tell my team this all the time: yes, writing an email for someone might take you only 5 minutes, but if 10 other people ask you to write their emails too that's 55 mins you'll never get back.

I know that sometimes we ask to be on a writer's tag list because we liked a particular series or pairing. But then, the style of writing changes or the series ends or we simply aren't into that pairing anymore. Or -- the writer has views we disagree with and cannot reconcile their personality with their art. We're all human, and it's easier to ignore than to confront.

@jerzwriter said it best: it can be awkward to ask someone to remove you from the list outside of the tag list clean-up request. I'd rather people be honest and say, "I'm just not that into you anymore" than ghost me.

So, here's a poll for anyone interested in sharing their anonymous view.

[fizzingwizard]

Today on things I IMMEDIATELY turned off, lol...

But first, props to tumblr for at least making sure we all knew about the change, not just silently adding it and making some random tumblr user release a psa. And for making it customizable/easy to disable.

I get how this could be fun. I hate blaze, but if you've got cash to burn and you really think so-and-so's video of a hamster in a party hat is the funniest thing ever, sure, it's your money, waste it how you want. Better to throw some coins to tumblr for hamsters in party hats than treat us to more mainstream ad content.

Of course, out of all the blazed posts that have ended up on my dash, very few have been hamsters-in-party-hats worthy. Most have just been stuff I didn't care about or something mildly insulting. But maybe the hamsters-in-party-hats crowd just don't have money.

Biggest concern is whether you get to consent first to someone else choosing to blaze your post. Tumblr says if someone blazes our post we'll be informed, and have the option to cancel it. It's an opt out instead of opt in. That's what bugs me. I hate opt out. I'd rather that if someone wanted to blaze my post, I had to definitively say "Yes." What if someone blazes my post and I'm in the hospital and don't see it before it's live? You CAN pull it after, which is great, but why not skip that whole song and dance by requiring people to opt in before the post can go live?

Lol. I don't agree. But we'll see.

Also disagree. Blazing is not the same as reblogging. I can't control what other people reblog which ends up on my dash, but I CAN choose who I follow, and if their content becomes something I'm not interested in, I can unfollow them. Only way out of Blaze is to cough up money for ad-free browsing. A while ago I tried blocking blogs that put blazed posts on my dash, but the blazed posts continued to appear. Maybe that has been fixed, I don't know.

The sticking point really is a matter of consent. I've been on tumblr for ten years. I don't freaking remember most of what I posted back then. There's probably something embarrassing someone who really disliked me could dig up if they wanted to. If this option MUST be opt-out, then I wish at least all posts made before the change were opt-in only. If the approval process before someone is allowed to blaze your post is more robust than I anticipate, I won't mind as much though. Basically just let people have the MAIN say in whether or not their post gets blazed, instead of treating the informing of the OP like it's a courtesy.

Tumblr should keep in mind that a lot of original content here is diary-like, personal, meant for a small group of followers who feel comfortable with each other. It's not a site many people use to make their BRAND. That's ALSO one of the good things about tumblr - I don't sit around worrying about how fake everyone is like I do almost anywhere else. That's why I'm not interested in this feature. I can see it being used for good - blazing a gofundme for someone in need, for example - but I just don't want to wade through even more cringe I didn't ask for on my dash. Sigh.

Anyway, hopefully everyone who doesn't want this opts out without a hitch (for side blogs too).

[danpuff-ao3]

A year ago today, I got myself out of a bad situation. Which calls for celebration, don't you think?

I won't name names or go into heavy detail, because I'm not here to stir drama. I have no interest in inviting conflict into my life, after working so hard to escape it.

But this was a big part of my journey.

I spent a lot of time in one very specific fandom, centered around a BNF. I was overwhelmed, and miserable. People I thought were my friends villainized me. Weaponized my feelings against me. Turned on me, because I didn't agree with them. That space was a BNF echo chamber, and dissent was treason.

I am cursed with loyalty and stubbornness to worrying degrees. I don't let go of anything easily. A Taurus, a Hufflepuff, in the worst of ways. I stayed in a bad situation for a very long time. I put a lot of time and effort trying to mend a problem that no one else saw, let alone wanted to fix.

I had panic attacks often. I would sit at my keyboard trembling with dread. I would sit under my desk and cry. I shed so many tears over these people.

Leaving that space was the hardest thing I ever did. Love and fear stayed my hand many times. But I was pushed well past my breaking point by the end. I left in the early hours of morning, while most people slumbered. I shook the entire time. And when the deed was done, a great weight lifted off my shoulders, and all I felt was relief.

Today is a day of many conflicting emotions. Lingering hurt, and guilt. Lingering thoughts of "what if?" If only I'd done more, tried harder, stayed longer, things might be different. But I choose to focus on pride. Being proud that I found enough self-worth and self-love to leave. Proud that I had the strength to get out, however scary it was, however hard it was. Proud of how far I've come since then.

And today, I think it's important to let you know a few things:

You do not owe creators comments, or any feedback. They're nice to give, but they are not owed.

You do not owe creators adulation, or worship, however skilled they are.

You are not required to agree with everything a skilled or popular creator does, says, thinks or feels. It's good to remember that they are as human as the rest of us.

Other people are not bad or wrong for disagreeing with a creator you like.

Other people are not bad or wrong for not liking a creator you like.

It is not okay to mob, or otherwise attack people in "defense" of your favorite creator.

Fandom was built on love, joy, and fun. If you're more miserable than happy, leave.

No person or community is owed your loyalty. It is okay to walk away from people and spaces that are making you uncomfortable, or are hurting you.

Curate your experience. Block tags, block people, block whatever you need to. Real life is hard enough; fandom shouldn't have to be.

You are just as important as everyone else in fandom. You are just as important as people you see as more talented, more popular, more charming, more whatever you see them as. You are just as important as people with more followers, more friends. You are just as important as big names. You deserve respect, and decency, the same as everyone else.

There is no shame in taking care of yourself. Stop reading. Stop commenting. Stop writing. Stop interacting. Take a break. Never return. Change direction. Set boundaries. Make new friends. Explore new places. Pick up new hobbies. Whatever you need to do. You matter. Taking care of yourself is important, whatever that looks like.

Other people matter, too. Be kind.

Though I'm speaking out a bit, I still live with a lot of fear, which is why reblogs are turned off. My old community is not above dragging people through the mud by name. Since I refuse to stoop to that level, I do ask that if anyone from there finds this, please leave me be. You can continue to talk about me behind my back, that's fine, but I don't want vitriol in my inbox. If you want to reach out and talk and not mention how awful I am, that would be fine.

I worked hard for the peace I have. I hope others can respect that. And I hope anyone that needs the encouragement to stand up for themselves, if anyone needs to be told they can get out, I hope this helps. You don't have to suffer. You don't have to "put up with it." If you feel stuck, if you feel alone, you don't have to be. Fandom is a big place. There are people out there and places out there that are right for you.

If you are in a bad situation, and you need someone to talk to, my inbox is open. Take care of yourselves, please!

[storyofmychoices]

Tiramissyou

[Bryce Lahela x Olivia Hadley Masterlist]

Pairing: Bryce Lahela x Olivia Hadley ; Other Characters: Jackie Varma Book: Open Heart (around book 2) Word Count: <550 Rating/Warning: General (silly fluff) Prompt: @choicesaugustchallenge — tiramisu ; Favorite LI @choicesmonthlychallenge

Synopsis: Bryce visits Olivia at the hospital on his day off and brings her favorite dessert.

He found her in the doctors' lounge. His arm slipped around her waist as she waited by microwave for her lunch.

A smile grew at the familiar touch. Olivia leaned into the warmth of his embrace for a moment before turning to face him. "Not that I mind seeing that face—" She chewed her lower lip, drinking in every ounce of him. "—but I thought you had today off. What are you doing here?"

Bryce held her close, pressing a kiss to her cheek. "I tira-missed-you!" He wagged his brow, a cheeky grin drawing across his face as he revealed a take-out bag from her favorite cafe.

"Ooo!" Her eyes widened in excitement. The back of her fingers wiped across her cheek before shooting out to grab the bag. "I'll take that off your hands!"

"Did you just—" Bryce scoffed and pulled the treat away. "You just wiped off my kiss."

A subtle pink hue filled her cheeks as she looked away. "It was a little wet," Olivia offered quietly.

"Oh, is that so?" He reeled her back in, kissing her face repeatedly, leaving big sloppy kisses everywhere. 

"Bryce!" She giggled and squirmed, trying to get away. "Stop!"

"Okay," he agreed, pressing a gentle kiss on the tip of her nose. "Just one more..." With that, he brushed a kiss on her cheek once more, this time trailing his tongue up her face. 

"BRYCE!" Her blushing cheeks rivaled the color of her fiery hair now. "I can't believe you just did that!" She glanced nervously around the nearly empty lounge.

"Worried we'll make others jealous?" His gaze followed hers as he peered around the lounge until he caught Jackie's eye. "I can share the love!"

"If you even take a step this way, Scalpel Jockey, I will cut you!" She glared back at him.

He snickered, raising a challenging brow. "With what, the plastic knife from the cafeteria?"

Jackie held the white blade in one hand, angling it out toward him. "Don't forget—" she lifted another utensil in her other hand, her lips pulling into a dangerous smirk. "—I have a spork, too!"

"Not a spork!" He held his hands up in mock defeat, a low chuckle rumbling in his chest. "You win this round, Varma!"

Olivia took the opportunity with Bryce distracted to grab the bag. "Thank you very much! I'll be taking this now." She rocked forward on her toes, pressing a light kiss on his cheek. "In case you were wondering, that is what a cheek kiss should be." 

His thumb grazed gently across her cheek, wiping away the remnants of his final kiss. "Agree to disagree." 

Her attempts to hide her growing smile were lost. 

He tucked her hair behind her ears. "I will never tire of seeing that smile."

"With you in my life, how could I be anything but happy?"

Bryce cradled her face, the pair getting lost in each other's gaze as they drifted closer.

From across the lounge, Jackie feigned a gag. "Change of plans. I'm going to stab myself with this spork instead. Anything is better than suffering another second of this."

Olivia's face scrunched as her delight grew into a round of laughter. "To be continued."

I hope you enjoyed this pointless silly drabble! Thank you so much for reading it. I always appreciate all the love and support these two get 💛💛💛

Tags in a reblog, please let me know if you'd like to be added or removed.

[midnight-in-town]

Hi, sorry for troubling you. Actually I need some advice. If you think I’m too much of a nuisance please ignore me. I don't know other country’s history (not that I know much about mine). A few weeks ago I came across a post that the writer had used some historical terms to justify a character’s behavior. It had nearly 100 likes and seemed legit and persuasive like she was very knowledgeable but it sounded off to me. Those were just eliminable comic relief scenes and the character was caricaturistic. A human with a healthy mental state, average IQ, and a little sense of social grace wouldn’t act like that. The writer’s tone was hostile, too and she turned an accuracy question into a moral one. She liked that character so much that didn't even try to hide her anger. Even though the asker was anon she implied that she/he is a sucker for pretty boys and a misogynist. How would she know? I was convinced that something was off and with no hope of getting an answer, I emailed a history website and ask them if she was right, the reply was really surprising. Not just the character and those scenes but many other things are imaginary and her interpretations of those terms and conclusions are false. They told me that even the literature from that era can’t be trusted or used as reliable sources because it’s the nature of fiction to be fanciful and misleading. I sent the email to her adding nothing, assuming she’d feel guilty for implanting false knowledge in fans, but she said she had no time for haters. I don’t know anybody on Tumblr or that fandom, and no one would believe an outsider. They are already satisfied with the lies. If one cares about the truth, one searches for it. Even so, is there anything I should do? Do I have any obligation to do anything? Thank you.

Hey Anon! You are not a nuisance at all :)) although, to be honest, it's hard to give advice when I'm not fully aware of the situation you're asking about.

From my understanding, you disagree with how a blogger justified a character's behavior in a work of fiction, which was done by quoting wrong historical facts, therefore providing false information to other fans, and you're wondering how to rectify it? I hope I understood properly?

To start with, I'm sorry to say that this happens very often in fandoms across the internet.

Browsing through the internet, you will always find people who do not share similar views about characters, theories, world building, romance, authors' inspirations, etc leading to a huge gap amongst fans, depending on who agrees on what.

The reason why that exists is because people aren't always neutral when reading, therefore their opinions and expectations can color the story they read in a certain way, leading to some misconception and bias.

This literally happened in every fandom I know, so the first thing I would advise is to keep in mind that, even with good arguments, you cannot always change the mind of everyone you disagree with, because everyone reads/watches a story through a personal lens.

In other words, pick your battles: what do you accept to disagree on and what do you think is unacceptable misconception? That's for you to decide and to act on, knowing that even with good and reasonable arguments, some people just won't take your side.

Speaking of which, as a second advice: you strongly disagree with the original poster and you really don't want to let it go? Well, act on it !

Friendly reminder that, from the moment you're acquainted with a series and you enjoy it, then you already belong in its fandom. Who cares if you just joined Tumblr or if you just discovered this series? You're as much a fan as anyone else and you have a right to your opinions, just like anyone else.

So, what to do? Open the debate by reblogging the post and explain to the original poster why you disagree with her, by detailing your arguments.

Nowadays, not a lot of people comment or reblog posts anymore to offer additional thoughts: they'd rather hide behind anon mode but anonymity doesn't always allow for an open debate, on the contrary!

Myself as a blogger who receives some anon asks, I can guarantee you that I'm always nicer and more open to discussion if someone comes to me off anon, especially if it's to disagree with something I said. Because I put a blog's name on an idea and it brings a lot more humanity in the discussion. :)

Additionally, some people also think that disagreeing means being disrespectful, but that's not the case at all. You can always peacefully and kindly explain to someone why you disagree with them.

So gear up and be brave ! You disagree and it's important to you to explain why? Well, state your opinion high and loud with your blog's name, like a proud of fan of whatever series or character this is about. And again, even if you don't change their mind, that's okay, at least you stated what you had to say and that's what matters.

Lastly though, a word of caution.

To quote you : "The writer’s tone was hostile, too and she turned an accuracy question into a moral one. She liked that character so much that didn't even try to hide her anger. Even though the asker was anon she implied that she/he is a sucker for pretty boys and a misogynist. How would she know?"

As I was saying above, I think unfortunately anonymity in asks is used way too often and bloggers are from time to time fed up with getting asks or opinions without a name to address directly.

Additionally, a lot of asks are sent without necessarily taking the time beforehand to check whether or not the blogger was open to discussion on different subjects in the first place. Hence the hostile tone in answers from time to time.

Take my blog as an example: after ten years on this site, there are certain subjects that I either won't ever want to discuss or some opinions on some characters that I'm beyond fed up with. So anyone barging into my askbox as an anon on either aspects will end up deleted or blocked or maybe answered with a rather hostile tone, because I already stated my opinion ten, twenty or thirty times.

Sure it's not very nice and it doesn't please me to answer this way if I even answer, but I believe, as far as I'm concerned, that it's stated very plainly and often, enough so that people would know if they bothered to check for a second before sending an ask.

So I understand that the hostile tone and the misogyny allegations that you're describing aren't pleasing, but be sure to check why the hostility exists in the first place: is it really that the original poster is narrow-minded and can't be reasoned with ? Or is it that they are often faced with anons who don't bother acknowledging what she said in the past before asking ? Because that will definitely factor into how open-minded the original poster will be if you go for a debate.

TL;DR You can always disagree and discuss why with anyone in any fandom. However, choose your fights and, mostly, choose your weapons well:

state your opinions with your blog's name, in a reblog or in a comment, and definitely not as an anon, if you want to be taken as seriously as possible

always check beforehand about the blogger you want to debate with, so that you can understand who you're talking to a little bit better

be respectful as you disagree and all will go well

I hope it helps? Sorry if not. Have a good day Anon! ^3^