#all art school did for me was cause a breakdown and for me to lose my joy for creating art

[stickynotestoletters]

may i ask for some poly relationship w larry & sal x male reader hcs?

Ah! Of course! :) Sorry I've been taking so long school is getting to me cause of finals;-;

Warnings: Noncannon compliant (their parents aren't together, no one dies, etc), NSFW (implied teen NSFW otherwise they're out of highschool), no weird cult stuff but they still ghost hunt, more modernish (?) phones and stuff

Sal x Male Reader x Larry hcs

highschool

I think that Sal and Larry would have gotten together before you got there

Like, I say gotten together but the way they started it was literally best friends that were super hornknee and decided to have sex together

They started then developing romantic feelings for each other though

And although the sex dynamic wasn't perfect (refer to my Sal x reader NSFW fic) it was good and they loved each other

It became an on and off thing until they actually worked it out

they talked about it and decided that it was better that they stay friends until they can sort out their own sexual desires and endeavors

Sal didn't even know he could do both as a switch and verse so he wanted to just re-examine his sexual self

And Larry was okay with that

So they decided to date but just without sex for a while

Then you moved to Nockfell their sophomore year

and god were you cool

Sal was the first one to see you in the hallway

It wasn't love at first sight really

He thought you were cool and he wanted to talk to you

Then that same day he told Larry about you during lunch

"I want to talk to him I just don't know how to approach him"

"Oh, well who is it?"

Ngl Larry was kinda jealous about how flustered Sal was getting at the prospect of a new friend but then Sal pointed at you and Larry was like "Oh, okay, I get it."

So Larry just approaches you

It was kinda to tease Sal about how shy he was being

Also kinda because you looked rad as fuck

So Larry approaches you sitting at a table alone

You were actually quite chill

You were happy since no one was approaching you

You guys hit it off and ended up becoming really good friends!

So for the duration of your sophomore year and the summer of your junior year, you guys were really good pals and hung out a lot

Then Larry started developing feelings first

And he was super confused since he knew he still liked Sal, no doubt about it

So he was just super confused and conflicted because he didn’t want to break up with Sal

So during, about the first half, of all of your junior year he kept this to himself and tried to keep himself from feeling for you

Sal on the other hand already accepted his feelings, he realized it later than Larry

And he read yp on what being polygamous meant

So although there was a lot of confusion at first he figured it's no different from people in love triangles

He realizes it a couple weeks after Larry and decides to bring this up to Larry during winter break

The conversation pretty much just went like Sal explaining polyamory to Larry for an hour

They end up deciding to just wait a bit and try to flirt with you individually

you know,

because they don't remember that you don't know they're attracted to you at this point

:)

So basically you think that they're both trying to cheat on each other for the week they're flirting with you

At the end of that week, you tell them to meet you together

And they don't know any better than to meet you

And then you come to them, don't let them explain, and cry because you don't want two of your best friends to cheat on each other like this even though you like them

And then they realize why you're saying this

So although this was not the time they expected to confess to you they told you what they were trying to do

So you just sat there

With these two idiots

and told them "No guys, cause I was literally having a breakdown about losing my two best friends."

And they confess to you

and everything is emotional and raw and you accept

Your guys' dynamic doesn't change because you’re dating now

The only difference is you guys make out together and show lots more pda

although you always bring up what they did when they were trying to give you hints

"We just really wanted to flirt with you okay??? Is it such a crime to want your crush to fall for you???"

"When you guys don't explain you're looking to expand your relationship, yes. Yes, it is Larry."

"He's kind of right babe-"

"SAL-"

Y'all spend a lot of time communicating with each other on stuff like that now

Your senior year goes without any bumps between all of you and you then graduate

College Dynamic

so you and the gang (except Ash, she moves to the city of course) goes and makes a college house

once you all move in together there it's a new routine

You all agreed and talked about the move together and what it would entail

And then you all finally realized how different it was from a monogamous relationship it was

But you all had your learning curves within the relationship

You find out more about their dynamic as a couple

For example, Larry and Sal never liked to fall asleep without you anymore

They had trouble sleeping without you beforehand and the first time you all slept in the same bed together it was just... so... peaceful

They'll spoon and cuddle without you individually (Sal is always the big spoon with Larry)

but they just love falling asleep next to you

They also refuse to do homework without you there

Even if it's just the simplest this they're just gonna need to have you in the room to finish it

Sal likes to make songs about you guys

He records them and edits some but he never lets you two listen to them

"It's just embarrassing if you two were to listen to it. It's like confessing my love for you guys all over again except I can't hide behind the mask."

So until he decides to release his songs online or plays those at gigs he's never going to let you listen to them

Larry likes to paint you guys

His paintings of you before the "disaster confession" were okay, it just looked like he was making a painting of a friend, except for the occasional rose

But now he paints you and draws you two whenever he can

He finds it funny how flustered you and Sal get whenever he makes suggestive paintings or sketches of you two

One time he painted a whole sex portrait of you and Sal together (A 12 by 28 specifically) hung it upright in front of the door to your rooms and didn't tell anyone

So after you and Sal got home that day you were welcomed with Larry lounging on your bed with the giant picture of you fucking Sal next to him

It was definitely beautiful though, even if it's hard to call your nudes beautiful

"Larry Johnson, this painting, as always, masterful. Beautiful craftsmanship but please-" "-we mean this in the most loving way possible Larry-" "-STOP PAINTING OUR NUDES BABE"

He put it away to be hung up in your apartment for when you all move out

Non-College Life

Once you all finish college you guys move into an apartment outside of Nockfell

The minute after you and Sal leave to get food Larry puts up all his private paintings of you guys

It's funny to him

I imagine you guys moving to a really populated city

Somewhere where it's a good place for people wanting to have creative jobs but still close to Nockfell

Maybe not back to New Jersey but probably not as far as New York or LA

you guys do all the cute stuff you never got to in Nockfell together

It's not like the majority of Nockfell was homophobic, mostly just the people who went to the church

But a lot more of them didn't think that polyamory was possible

So now it's easier

It's not like you never experience any polyphobia anymore but it's easier because you're in a more open-minded place

Sal's favorite thing is to go to concerts now

And pride

He also likes coffee house dates too

Larry gets hit on a lot though whenever you guys go out anywhere though

He finds it funny how jealous you both get

Sometimes if he wants Sal to get really mad he'll play along

But most of the time he shuts it down before it begins

Sal gets hit on a lot at concerts the most though

He gets kind of awkward about it, he's not going to edge them on but he gets uncomfortable enough to just not know how to shut them down

Usually, you and Larry will just appear behind him and whisk him away

Larry likes to use it as teasing leverage for a good rough one that night but you usually make sure he's okay with it before Larry does anything

You get hit on the most casually

Here and there but there aren't really specific places

It just sort of happens

You mostly shut them down alone

But occasionally you'll have to go to Sal and Larry if they're persistent

And they'll be mean too

One of the first times you saw Sal and Larry ever legitimately get that mean was when you got hit on in a club and they both just pulled you behind them and absolutely ripped the person a new one

You guys really like to stay at home if you guys have dates though that way everyone feels included

But when you all do go around together it's always specifically for three people you never tell anyone it's a date for dinner reservations, you always make sure you go on rides everyone wants to go on at amusement parks, and hey if worse comes to worst smoking is a group activity (if you have asthma or any other breathing condition Larry makes you edibles if you really wanna do edibles with them)

Starting jobs there are tough and all but you make it off your feet

Sal ends up booking a lot of gigs and Larry's commission request skyrocket when he moves to the city and makes a blog about his art

You all get an apartment with affordable rent and one that allows Gizmo

I hc that Gizmo is an esp but I don't know if that's real

So regardless you'll still be able to have room for him

Sal proposes to both of you

You guys talked about marriage and decided that it would be easier legally to just not get married through a court

So you guys have a friends wedding and Gizmo is the ring bearer

You guys don't get a fancy venue or anything

You guys all just have a city wedding

NSFW

So, the first time you all decide to hook up it's mostly just very communicative rules beforehand

Sal is more comfortable with being fucked than fucking someone else at most times but "It's not like I never want to stick my dick in you two" as he puts it

He also likes background music on most of the time

It's kinda weird if there isn't just a little bit of music

It isn't really bothersome, you guys keep it below 20 at most times

Sal's also super submissive

He liked it rough, make him cry out for you two

A bit of a pillow prince

Especially enjoys being tied up by you two

gags and blindfolds are on the table

Although whenever he does feel up to fucking you and Larry he'll usually end up having you two ride him because he gets to be such a mess with you two unless he's jealous or upset

Usually, when he's upset he's gonna lift you two up and fuck you against the headboard or wherever you two are if he's impatient enough

One time you were chilling with Larry in your bedroom and he was painting over his easel

Sal burst through the door where it slammed back on itself and closed itself

He then tracks his eyes on you

immediately asks you "Can I please fuck you right now"

and as soon as your safe word and consent comes out of your mouth he's holding you down on the bed and fucking into you so hard you can barely breath

Larry doesn't mind it and just continues painting with you moaning and being so pathetic in the background of his music

He kinda finds it funny because before you all got together and he and Larry would angry fuck it never worked out

Sal was just being a brat most of the time because Larry still wouldn't let him fuck him submissively

Speaking of which, Larry's more comfortable with being dominant, he'll bottom but only if he can still be dominant otherwise forget it

Larry's just a rough fucker anyway

He really likes pushing and holding you two up against walls when he fucks you guys

He likes showing off the muscles he got helping his mom with handy work and stuff like that

The first time he did this was to Sal when you were studying in your guy's room

You said you didn't really wanna participate today so they fucked like they would without you

And so they're talking back and forth, teasing each other

and Larry corners him

And just

lifts him up

It looked like he was just lifting a bag of sugar up

Sal seemed weightless as Larry just rocks into him

It was one of the hottest things you'd seen at the time so you joined them

You do that a couple more times but then it just becomes normal and you decide you need to start finishing all those assignments

Larry does that to you one on one as well without Sal but it happens to Sal a lot more spontaneously

Larry though is kinkier than Sal in some respects

He'll try anything at least once "Lisa didn't raise no bitch-"

He's really into breeding and long fucking sessions though

Like, lowkey he has omegaverse fantasies

Not because of the weird stuff just because a lot of the time..... they have breeding written in

He'll never admit to reading any of it but you know he has at least once

Super into dirty talk

And he's really good at it

He also had a praise kink and a degradation kin

He likes degrading you and you telling him thank you and how good he's treating a filthy little brat like you

"What're my filthy little brats good for other than sucking my dick so well. Taking me so well like the dirty little whores you are?"

"Yes sir-" "-we're made for your big cock-" "-thank you for fucking us like this-"

He especially likes breeding you and having Sal suck you off while he does it, he finds your crying cute

And an added bonus is rewarding Sal after for it

You guys talk about long-term consent and all that and decide that it's a good idea, you all trust and love each other so there isn't a problem

lol this kinda went to shit at the end but I still like it enough! Thanks for the Sally Face request I really like this game and the dynamic between a poly reader hc :)

-Laika

[jostystyles]

break more hearts than mine | part 1 | jm & mb

a/n: and here we go! let’s get this story started! I hope you all enjoy this little universe i’ve started to put together. this one is kind of an introduction to the characters and gets the ball rolling. please let me know what you think! all the love as always xx

word count: 1.5k

warnings: mentions of food, swearing, mentions of death angst, fluff. mostly angst

00:45.

00:44.

C’mon J. He thought. Time’s almost up. He loved this feeling though. He could hear the crowd screaming, cheering, banging on the glass. The chirps of the other team and the shout of his teammates. It was all up to him. The clock was running down, and they were tied 2-2. It was the last game of his junior career, before he moved on to college. His teammate, John B, as everyone called him, was skating up as he shouted towards JJ, and passed him the puck. His ears ringing and breathing heavy, He stopped the puck on his stick, and skated like he’d never skate again. This was his signature move. Get the puck, glide, and slap. The JJ special. He flew past the other team's right wing, and as he was headed face first towards the boards, he did it. He shot the puck into the top right corner of the net, and the crowd went wild. The horn blew out, and the buzzer followed not long after. His teammates bombarded him in chants, and he was engulfed in one giant celly. 

(Y/N) was on the edge of her seat. She kept glancing back and forth between the clock and the ice, her eyes never on any player but 44. JJ Maybank. Her best friend, her everything. Everything but the one thing she wanted. The jersey on her back mimicked his. She saw the goal coming, like she usually did. When it hit the back of the net, she jumped out of her seat screaming, and into her friend Gina’s arms. The two girls basked in the thrill of the win for a few minutes before making their way outside, where they’d meet the boys soon after.

“Atta boy Maybank, you fucking tank. What a goal. Perfect send off y’know.” John B said, shaking the blonde’s shoulders. “On the way to greet your girl?” He teased, dragging out the last word. JJ shook his head, smiling. “Very funny JB. She’s not my…. Nah. She’s my girl, but y’know. Not like that.” He played off. 

(Y/N).

Where should he start? They’d been best friends since they could walk, and had been through everything together. They took skating lessons together, before (Y/N) decided hockey just wasn’t her thing. So she took art lessons instead, and became JJ’s biggest fan. They went through thick and thin. John B made his way into the friendship during third grade, when he and JJ got partnered up during practice, and they started causing trouble at school together instead of apart. 

(Y/N) was just always there. She was there when his mom died when they were 10, and when he had to read the letter from her that told him she left her life savings so he could keep playing hockey. She was there when things got bad with his dad, when he finally had to stop playing off that his bruises and cuts were from hockey. She was there when he got a full ride to play hockey, and he cried because he was finally leaving home. 

He was there when she got bullied in middle school for hanging around with boys. He was there when she had breakdowns, and when she fought with her parents for saying she wanted to go to art school. He was there when she got accepted into the school of her dreams, one of the best programs for art. Which, just so happened to be the same school JJ was playing hockey. 

Basically, they’d been through everything together. He could never lose her. She was the only person who made him feel like he could make it, that he wasn’t a fuck up like everyone told him he’d be, and not even hockey could save him. But no, he wasn’t in love with her. He couldn’t be. She was too good for him. Which is why he told himself she was just his best friend, that’s all, and then lost himself in whichever girl threw herself at him that day. 

On the other hand, JJ was (Y/N)’s world. She thinks she had loved him before she knew what love was. But she’d never act on it, because she knew she wasn’t good enough for him. She was just his nerdy best friend who was always covered in paint. So she watched from the sidelines, as he took home a different girl, who was quite literally the opposite of her every night. And each time he did, she felt her heart break just a little more. But she couldn’t give him up. He was like a drug, that no matter how many times she tried to go sober, he’d always find his way back into her veins. 

But hey, you know what they say. Five minutes of pleasure is worth a lifetime of pain. With college approaching faster than ever, she thought maybe something would change. Maybe he’d finally see her in the light she always wanted him too. I mean, it had to be a sign from the universe that they ended up at the same school, right? She hoped so. Putting on the best smile she could fathom, she was met with the shouts of the ocean eyed boy as he swept her up into his arms outside the rink. 

“Ok. You’re sure you have everything? You have all your toiletries? Your clothes? Oh- what about-” 

“Mom, it's okay. I have it all. I’m good. We checked the list 3 times over, remember?” (Y/N) said, laughing softly at her mother’s antics.

“I know. I just want to make sure you’re set. This is the furthest you’ve been from me your whole life. I’m just so proud of you.” Her mom replied, a shake in her voice. 

(Y/N)’s heart swelled. It wasn’t too long ago that she would slam her doors and cry after her mother told her she’d never get anywhere with an art degree. Now, here she was, about to start classes  on her way to be a Creative Director and a freelance artist. She was chasing her passion. 

“How’s JJ? Is he all settled in?” “Yes mom, he moved in last week since they started team building and practicing.”

“Ok, that's nice to hear. I’m just so proud of you. Both of you. I know this is hard for him, but it will be good.” (Y/N)’s mom said. 

“Yeah. I think so too. I don’t think he’ll stay here long. He’ll be on his way to the big leagues before we know it.” (Y/N) said with a smile, thinking back to all the times of sitting under the stars and listening to JJ tell her his dreams of living on an NHL salary, and getting to do what he loves forever. I’ll buy you all the paints you can dream of. The most expensive charcoal pens on the planet, He’d tell her. She wished to know the real meaning behind it. 

Not long after her mom had left, her roommate arrived. Her name was Kiara, an environmental science major from somewhere by the sea. Which was confusing as to why she chose a school that was inland, and in the north. “I needed a change of scenery,” She told (Y/N) “The environment is everywhere, so why not see it all?” They were going to be fast friends. 

JJ was leaving practice, on his way to go see how (Y/N) made out with move in, and before they had to go to some stupid freshman orientation event. He felt a slap on his shoulder, and was met with a pair of brown eyes and a mop of curls. 

“Yo, J! Me, Pope, and Tito were gonna go grab some sushi, you wanna tag along?” The boy said. 

“No thanks Tys, I gotta go meet my friend and see her dorm. Annoy the shit out of her and see if her roommate is hot. You know.” JJ replied. 

Tyson smirked. “Ohhhh I see how it is. Ditching us for your girl already, and we haven’t even met her. You’re whipped dude.” he teased. 

JJ rolled his eyes with a smile. “Whatever Josty. I’ll see you at the student center.”

Making his way towards the dorms, he felt his phone buzz. 

I lost my roommate already. Something about wanting to talk to public safety about the lack of recycling bins. Meet me outside in the quad and we’ll head over together?

Sure thing peach. 

He replied with the stupid nickname he’d been calling her since 6th grade when she dropped her peach slices at the beach. If only he knew how that name affected her. 

Her heart jumping at JJ’s reply, (Y/N) smiled shyly at her screen, before being met with her face in someone's chest, and a smoothie on her shoes. “Oh, shit. I’m so sorry. I’m such a ditz.” the voice to the chest replied, and (Y/N) looked up to meet a striking pair of hazel eyes and dark brown hair, her tummy on fire with a feeling she couldn't quite place.

 “Uh- its, yeah. It’s ok” she stumbled. 

“I’m really sorry again. Let me help you clean up. I’m Mat, by the way. Mat Barzal.”

Yeah, (Y/N) was fucked.

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[snalsupremacy]

2022 events (complete!)

- Disclaimer: These are not all of the events that happened in 2022, just the ones I happen to come across.

-Circus band plays megalovania to the Pope -Tumbrl/IOS mega ban causes tumbrl to create a new language -Tumbrl has become too profitable, unlike CW who hasn't been profitable since 2006 -Italian senate zoom bombed with r34 of Tifa from Final Fantasy -Microsoft bought Activation Blizzard for 70 billion -10th Capybara long bath championship (this isnt much of an notable event but I just found out it exists and now so do you) -Netflix stocks plummet -TOTALLY SPIES REBOOT??? -Green M&M drama GUYS ITS NOT EVEN FEB CAN U CALL DOWN - GREEN M&M DRAMA WAS A DISTRACTION TO CHILD LABOR LAWSUIT??!? -Percy Jackson Disney+ series -Did the cryptoland thing happen this year?

-Maus school ban in Tennessee -The yassification of Pinocchio -Everybody is into Wordle -TikToker getting rejected by prestigious college? Scandalous! -Famous Brazilian podcaster publicly supports the foundation of a Nazi political party - Kirby car. Carby. - Palmeiras ainda não tem mundial :( -super bowl or whatever. Palmeiras was so close I could feel it. -Mitski's Laurell Hell on top 5 bill board??? -Incredibly I made it this far without even mentioning that Russia is trying to invade Ukraine -Petrópolis (RJ, Brazil) flods for the second time, killing hundreds -New yuri on ice official art in 2022, I don't even know what to say -Ukraine is getting evacuated -Kanye West insta breakdown -Arthur ends -Monster High reboot Draculaura's design slaps!! -Russia invades Ukraine -Texas anti-trans law now investigating trans kids' families for child abuse -ITS ME BOY IM THE PS5 SPEAKING TO YOU INSIDE YOUR BRAIN -Cheese belly weed cat started pokemon gen 9 or smth

-Live Slug reaction - THEY ADDED VIKTOR'S RING SHAKING PISSING CRYING -Florida's don't say gay bill - Disney supports don't say gay bill but Disney workers protest and now Disney doesn't -Parents mad at turning red for showing teenage girls periods, which they have, and twitter mad at them showing cringe drawings, which they also have -Purim and Patrick's Day coincidence which leads to a lot of drunks -DROP THE CAR BATTERY -Everybody watching the 8 hour victorius video (??) -Situation in Ukraine keeps getting worse - Gas price skyrocket now that countries is refusing to import russian gasoline -Jaiden animations comes out as aroace -Evergiven anniversary celebration by having the same ship cross the canal -US politician died? -WILL SMITH SLAPS THE SHIT OUT OF CHRIS ROCK ON THE OSCARS also many outfits slapped I am looking (respecfully) at zendaya and timothee chalamet

-Happy april fool's day! Tumbrl did a hole ass click-a-thon with bunch of crabs and even an small text rpg, cool! Also Brick head tumbrl sexymen?? -what happens in April 3rd??? Why is danny phantom everywhere??? Also grammys -R/Place becomes the first virtual active warzone between fandoms. fun! -Sonic 2 hell..... yes (also sonic 3? cant wait!) - LAPD sending in like 100 police men for literally 4 environmental scientists peacefully protesting -Namona re-newed by netflix me thinks - Scart finally gets his accorn as a goodbye to BlueSky studios - Elon Musk tries to buy twitter -Ramadan Easter Pessach combo -Rihanna's boyfrend arrested -Tumbrl blaze drops -MISHA COLLINS COMES OUT AS BISEXUAL -Johnny Depp and Amber Heard lawsuit -Netflix reveals that they lost like 200,00 + 700,00 (from russia) subscribers and expect to lose more -OMG IT WAS A MISUNDERSTANDING MISHA COMES OUT AS STR8 💀💀 -Elon Musk BUYS TWITTER - Oh yeah Morbius - James Corden leaves late late show lets goooo

- GOP draft leak of trying to overrule roe v wade drops while Met Gala is happening -Everyone into Dracula daily -Eurovision week! Veggies and Pussy will be for ever in my heart. - NEW MCR SONG NEW MCR SONG NEW MCR SONG NEW MCR SON -UK GETS SECOND PLACE??? WTF???? Ukraine wins, NOT LATVIA???? WTF???? - Finland joins NATO - holy shit. Avatar 2. its out, its finally out -Still not fully convinced but hxh might return?? -OH OH OH ITS NOT FAKE ITS NOT FAKE HXH WILL RETURN HOLY SHIT SHAKING AND CRYING RN HXH IS COMING BACK GAHSGSAJ -Happy 3rd anniversary to Promare, best t4t anime couple i will not elaborate -Texas elementary school shooting, 21 dead -Guy throws cake at mona lisa - BTS meets with Joe Biden at the White House??? -Pokemon V&S legendary drop

-Back by unpopular demand: morbius in theaters -Berserk is back -Gravity Falls 10 year anniversary! as a present we got the full we'll meet again song and SO MUCH shade from talks alex had about censorship issues -California ruled that in some situations bees can be considered fish so that it can be protected under the endangered species law -That AI machine that can generate images (DALL-E) -Internet Explorer shuts down -Pikachu man ad nightmare fuel - 3 NEW ATLA MOVIES COMING OUT LETS GO -Elon Musk getting sued or smth -Overruled Roe v Wade - Oslo shooting at LGBT club kills 2 and harms 21 more - Technoblade dies of cancer at 23

- Tributes to Technoblade continue such as other streamers and Minecraft itself - Shooting at 4th of July parade at Chicago, 6 dead - Boris Johnson +50-ish ministers resign in like 48 hours - Kazuki Takahashi, creator of Yu Gi Oh, found dead at a beach - Shinzo Abe, Japan's previous prime minister is assassinated during public speech -Argentinian Economy Minister resigns - Luis Echeverria, Mexican ex-president, dies at 100 - Elon Musk pulls out on Twitter deal and Twitter sues him for that -Georgia Guidestones destroyed - José Eduardo dos Santos, Angolan ex-president, dies at 79 - Sri Lanka's economy collapses, protester storm Gotabaya Rajapaksa's (President) house, as well as setting fire to Ranil Wickremesinghe's (PM) house - Finally good news! The James Webb telescope released some images and they are absolutely BEAUTIFUL! - Ivana Trump (Trump's ex wife) dies of yet unknown causes (Update: I think she fell off stairs?) - The Looney Tunes social media managers just confirmed Bugs Bunny and Daffy Duck are a couple???? - Stray is a cat simulator is think? kinda like the goose thing back in like 2018? -Pink sauce that actually kills people -Start Trek actress nichelle nichols dies at 89

- Shakira may be going to prison for Tax Evasion???? - Jo Soares dies at 84 - One of Trump's houses gets raided by the FBI - Bridget from guilty gear confirmed trans! big w! - Serena Williams retires - Olivia Newton-John  dies at 73 - Fan fiction AO3 OTW tiffany election something along those lines idk i dont read - HBO Max Cartoon Network purge

-Florence Pugh arrives at venice film festival while the rest of the cast for Don't Worry Darling does a press interview (?) -Supernatural trending, 3 dead 11 injured - Chris Pine exposed for being and erotica writer and like 5 other things - Dan and Phil posted a video where multiple things are said but mainly notable female celebrity suggested a threesome which is just so funny - Reigen vs Sans finale of the ultimate tumbrl sexyman election interrupted by the death of Queen Elizabeth II - Sans wins bc of he does. Was there even a questions? How tf did reigen even get that high up?? -TRISHA PAYTAS GIVES BIRTH RIGHT AFTER THE QUEEN DIES - TOBY FOX WRITES REIGEN VS SANS FANFICTION WHAT IS GOING ON - Reigen istg he won babygirl awards, anime twink, sexiest anime girl, the nobel peace prize, Dilf, Milf, -Meghan Markle wears the exact same fit as Diana's for the funeral - Harry Styles may or may not spit in Chris Pine's face - SPAMTON SWEEPSTAKES! DONATE AND MAYBE YOU TOO CAN BE A [BIG SHOT] -Iranian police kills woman (Mahsa Amini) over not properly wearing compulsory hijab, causes street riots -New James Webb picture of Saturn! Those pics re-awakening my love for space - 50 twitch dramas one in a row for like 5 days i don't even have the energy to name them all - Huge drama chess involving alleged cheating via anal beads and playing naked to prove wrong what is going on - Brazilian presidential election is like trying to decide between drowning and being on fire - Adam Levine exposed not only for cheating but being catastrophically bad at flirting - Ghost Files! The ghoul boys are back! - Ned from Try Guys cheats on his wife and is consequently gets kicked out of the team - Tumbrl lifts porn ban

- Sacheen Littlefeather dies - Dream face reveal - Bolsonaro and Lula for 2nd term election - Velma canonically lesbian for new Scooby Doo movie - Smth ab She-Hulk I dont have the energy to understand - Mario movie traler release went just as expected: Jack Black sold it and Chris Pratt... is trying his best - SNL parodies the Try Guys video where they announce Ned's leaving by making fun of everyone but ned :/// -Robbie Coltrane (who plays Hagrid in the Harry Potter movies) dies - Minecraft Mob voting! -SNIFFER WINS WHOOO -AO3 reaches 10M works - Markiplier will start an OnlyFans if he beats Joe Rogan in podcasts - Climate activists throw tomatoe soup in Van Gogh's Sunflower - UK PM resigns in 45 days -Elon Musk buys twitter

-Kit Connor forced to come out as Bisexual - Ryan Reynalds joins tumblr on... -The 2 year anniversary of canon destiel - Dracula Daily ends - I think Tommyinnit os on Tumbrl? The poor soul - Chris Evans chosen by People's magazine as the sexiest man alive, good for him! - American midterm elections -Ash from Pokemon finally becomes the very best that no one ever was - Kevin Conroy, famous va for Batman, dies at 66 - Trump announces he will run for 2024 presidential election - Two missiles (allegedly) from Russia hit Polish borders and kills 2 civilians, may cause call for article 5 of NATO - SpaceX launches another rockets i think? - Shane reveals he's a raylo shipper - Pokemon scarlet and violet releases and surprised! Its full of bugs bc its rushes -Breaking news: Sonic frontiers does NOT suck, its not perfect but MAN that means so much to sonic fans - AO3 down - AO3 back up -Jason David Frank, the original green Power Ranger, dies at 49 -Gerar putting their whole he/they pussy into those concert outfits he's been trending for a week now! - I'm so glad more people are talking about Goncharov (1973) is gaining more popularity its literally my favorite mafia film - Colorado shooting at LGBTQ+ club, 5 dead, suspect had already sent bomb threats a year prior and has charges for kidnapping but no one thought that maybe a guy like that should not own a gun :D -The walking dead just ended but most importantly IT WAS RUNNING THIS ENTIRE TIME??? -ARGENTINA LOST TO SAUDI ARABIA LETS GO BRAZIL WE GOT A CHANCE WE GOT THIS VAI BRASIL 100% JESUS VAMO HEXA - VAI BRASIL VAI RICHARLISON FUCK NEYMAR 2 A 0 2 A 0 VAMO HEXA - Argentina won against Mexico i guess :/ - Martin Scorcese acknowledges Goncharov, ending this crazy week of blogging with a bang -Christine McVie, Singer/songwriter of Fleetwood Mac, dies at 79 -Argentina wins again 🙄

-Ye (Kanye West) ruining his career interview by interview - Smth important politically happened in the US Destiel is trending again -US basketball player released from Russian prison in exchange of arms dealer -BRAZIL SPEAK TO ME -Argentina won AGAIN👹 - Elon Musk booed off stage a comedy show - Markiplied drops the OnlyFans and so many people join the site literally broke - Warrior Nun cancelled -JOJOLANDS RELEASE DATE FEB 17TH CANT COME SOON ENOUGH FEB 17TH CANT COME SOON ENOUGH -Argentina wins the world cup :/// I mean better than frnace ig -Messi pic on insta with the trophy beats the egg in most liked image -IM NOT OK ASH AND PIKACHU ARE LEAVING POKEANIME OMG HE MET WITH BUTTERFREE HE'S SAYING GOODBYE TO HIS OLD PALS OMG NO ONE TALK TO ME -BARBIE MOVIE TRAILER YESSS -The Glass Onion: A Knives Out Mystery out on netflix, and it's good! also Blanc canonically gay and is dating hugh grant in the movies? - Greta Thunberg twet burned andrew tate so hard, he made a comeback video which revealed his location, leading to his arrest!! ANDREW TATE ARRESTED!! -Last OOTT of the year ToT -Pelé, greatest soccer player of all time, died at 82 -This is not nearly as big as anything else on this list but this is my list and I get to put out whatever I want. SZIN POSTED NEW HYBRID HEROES EPISODE WOOOOOOOOO -Former pope died -Bolsonaro escapes to US i bet he won't come back to Brazil -Oof! what a year! see you all in 2023!

[kittenofdoomage]

Happy Birthday to my blog, seven years ago today I started out in this strange wilderness and it's only gotten stranger 👍 nearly 700 stories and over 3.3 million words of fanfiction.

I was just going to leave this as a happy birthday blog post but I feel like I've got a few things I need to get off my chest, so this is below the cut, I know not everyone wants to or particularly cares to read it so there's ya choice 🤷‍♀️

There's no big announcements here FYI. I'm just doing what my friends have told me and putting my thoughts down on paper.

Some of you may have noticed I'm not posting anything on Tumblr anymore. The lack of interaction (comments, asks etc.) has just really put me off putting anything on here because it doesn't really feel like anyone either wants to read it or wants me around anymore, and I'm not gonna beg for attention. I'm not surprised, to be honest, my whole life I've been a square peg in a round hole. People just don't want me around - it's not just online. In real life there's exactly one place I feel like no one wants me to leave and that's in my house, with my family. I've just always been an odd person, and there aren't many people who vibe with me, it's cool, I've accepted it. But I'm not gonna be opening myself to that discomfort or pain anymore. My fics are all on Ao3 and I'll continue to post on there, my Tumblr will remain but I can't find the strength to get excited about something and then deal with the crushing feeling that no one wants my work. TBH I barely check Tumblr that much anymore bc I only come on here to check messages (usually from Beka, who knows all of this already but if you're reading this, thank you for listening to me and being patient with my mental breakdowns). My asks are staying off for now (sorry, Heart Anon, I love you, I've no idea who you are but please know you've been a light in my life and I appreciate you so much, and Marie, you have also been a beautiful friend with your daily gifs and hearts) but my PMs are on, just don't expect an answer right away.

I turn 35 tomorrow. It's been playing on my mind a lot, especially since my life expectancy ain't looking too good lol. I don't really have much of a life outside Tumblr. I'm a pretty boring person actually. Writing was the way I expressed myself and I truly enjoyed interacting with people who liked my stories. During the pandemic, it's been a way to keep myself focused and keep from slipping into the dark places we're all too familiar with. But there have been occasions lately where writing has been the cause of a slip into a dark place. And that's not healthy, and I need to work on it. I feel this is the time to stop forcing myself to write, seeing as I can't do much of it with my tiny human home for the school holidays.

My Patrons don't need to worry, I've still got material to share, it's a commitment I intend to honor because really, writing is the only thing I have, the only thing I feel I can do well and I am so, so, so, appreciative of every single person that supports me. I can't have a regular job right now (I hope that will change at some point because I've worked all my life until I got sick and I hate it) but you guys have given me a thread of independence, of dignity, and I value every one of you so much, those who have supported, who continue to support and who do so in the future.

I know this won't get absorbed, because it never does but those of you who read on Tumblr... please share the work you like. Set up a separate blog if you're too embarrassed to share on your main, make a reblogging blog, send asks, whatever, just please tell your author how much you liked what they did. I can assure you, those authors are waiting for it. We work so hard on what we make, what we create, we want you to scream from the rooftops. It doesn't even have to be coherent, we love all the feedback, we crave it (as long as it's not just a demand for part two, even Thor learned to ask for more without being rude about it, everyone else can). Without it, we're like plants without water. We don't feel the want to create anymore. And that's kinda where I'm at now. I don't want to lose my passion for my art but when there's nothing to do it for, sometimes it's out of our hands.

So, that's where I'm at. I'll probably lose followers (though I've already lost 250 in the last two months so that's not a surprise) and if any of my Patrons feel like my statement is unacceptable, that's fine. I don't expect anyone to agree with me. I just wanted to put my feelings down, to be honest with everyone. And I have.

I don't want the list of stories to end at 700. I want to keep creating stories that everyone will enjoy. I really hope things with change, even if not for me, then for the others out there who are on their creative journey.

Much love to everyone, stay safe xxx

(this post will remain untagged so it will not show in searches and I'm not tagging those people who I have spoken to about this and my feelings in general, as they know who they are, and they know they're very special, amazing, and appreciated people to me. I don't particularly care if this gets reblogged or not.)

[scapegrace74-blog]

New Ways of Turning Into Stone

A/N  Another long drive, another Outlander fanfic idea that dropped into my brain out of nowhere, shoving aside the historical AU I have been wrestling with for months.  Here’s the pitch: Claire Beauchamp is a psychiatrist specializing in grief counselling.  Jamie Fraser is referred to her by his sister, who is worried for his well-being after a series of family tragedies.  You can probably guess the rest, but I’m going to write it anyway.   The title is taken from a song by the amazing Phantogram that was playing as the story idea came to me.

After losing my WIP virginity posting Ginger Snap, I’m going out on that limb again and posting this first chapter with only a rough outline mapped out in my head.  You people are a terrible influence!  Also, there will be some trigger warnings on future chapters, so please watch out for those.   And now, on with our show.

Claire Beauchamp glanced down at the leather-bound calendar open on her desk.  The ivory page for Thursday was packed to the margins, each hourly block filled with the name of a patient followed by a series of cuneiform symbols she used to remind herself of the last session, course of treatment, overall progress, all while maintaining strict confidentiality.  Not even Geillis Duncan, her office administrator and very good friend, knew how to decode the script.

Geillis liked to laugh at the old-fashioned day planner, reminding Claire that their practice utilized software that could perform the same function electronically, but she enjoyed the act of physically logging each session.  The solid heft of her Mont Blanc pen in her hand, a medical school graduation gift from her Uncle Lamb.  The scratch and grab of the nub as it bled black ink over virgin paper.  It was a tactile ceremony in a detached world.  Geillis would nod and then tell her she needed to get laid.

Speak of the devil, a sharp rap on her office door was followed by the appearance of her strawberry blonde head. blue eyes alight with mischief.

“Yer two o’clock is here.  Did ye need more time tae finish bolting down tha’ chaff ye call a salad, or can I show him in?”

“It’s kale,” she defended.  “It’s full of anti-oxidants.”

A disdainful scoff was the only response.

“Yes, Geil, please show Mister...” she glanced down at her planner, “...Fraser in, thank you.”

The tiny rectangle contained only a name, which meant this was their first appointment.  Geillis vetted all prospective patients, but Claire preferred to go into the first meeting blind, with no assumptions or pre-conceptions.  

She wondered what misfortune had caused Mr. Fraser to seek out her psychiatric services.  The death of a child, perhaps, or the end of an extra-marital affair.  People grieved for very different reasons and worked through or around that grief with a surprising variety of coping mechanisms.   Most called upon her practice in much the same way they would a breakdown truck when their car’s engine failed.  They simply wanted to get back on the road to happiness.

Despite the degrees and accreditations that decorated her office wall, Claire wasn’t certain such a thing was possible.  In her experience, grief was a phantom limb that never really went away.  The best one could hope for was to learn healthier ways of living with it.  

The sound of Geillis clearing her throat snapped her back to the present.

“Was there something else, Geil?”

“Och, no’ really.  Just, when yer considerin’ how tae thank me later on, remember tha’ my favourite stone is an emerald, that I prefer gold tae silver, but platinum is ne’er amiss.”

“What are you on about, Duncan?”  But her friend had already disappeared back into the reception area, leaving behind only the glow of her Cheshire smile.  Claire was shaking her head, bemused, when another knock rang out, this one considerably heavier than the first.

“Come in,” she called as she looked up.  And up.  And up some more.

The man who now practically filled her office door had to be at least six foot four, with powerful shoulders and a broad torso encased in a blue henley.  His nearly endless legs were likewise muscular, as testified by the stretch of his jeans across each thigh.  As if his physique wasn’t remarkable enough, he had a head of outrageously wavy red hair, worn long enough to graze the tops of his ears and the nape of his neck, but swept back from a high brow by a judicious use of product.  His face was angular in a pleasingly unique way, with a day or two’s growth of beard counter-balancing an almost youthful, earnest appearance.  But his most striking feature by far were his aquamarine eyes that shimmered like a tropical sea.  Eyes that were currently observing her with perplexity.

“Dr. Beauchamp?” a deep Scottish brogue inquired.  He pronounced it as though she were French.

“Yes,” she startled.  “That’s me.  And it’s pronounced Beecham.  Please, come in Mister Fraser.”  She shuffled a few items around her desk needlessly as she tried to compose herself.  Damn Geillis for not giving her a bit more warning that her newest client was some sort of fitness model.

“Thank ye,” he replied.  “An’ it’s pronounced Jamie, if ye please.”   She added wit to the growing list of the man’s attributes.

If anything, he grew even more impressive as he approached.  She could see he was nervous, although hiding it well.  His striking eyes darted about the room, trying to get a sense of his environment.  She indicated the well-upholstered armchair that sat to one side of her desk.

“Have a seat,” she invited.

With a surprising amount of grace for one so tall, he eased into the chair but didn’t lean back.  The fingers of his left hand tapped restlessly against his thigh.  She watched him quietly, waiting for him to speak.  This was a trick she had learned when she first started practicing psychiatry, but in this case it also allowed her to continue her appraisal.  He was, she concluded, the most attractive man she’d ever seen in the flesh.

“No couch,” he finally observed.

“No.  That’s a bit of a Hollywood trope, I’m afraid.  Lying prone in front of a stranger is hardly conducive to feeling at ease.”

He nodded his acceptance of her logic, but was otherwise silent.

“So,” she spoke at last, unable to wait him out, “what caused you to seek out counselling, Jamie?”  His name suited him, she thought as she spoke it for the first time.  Both boyish and imposing at once.

“I didna.  Twas my sister, Jenny, who insisted I see a doctor.”  His mobile mouth twisted into a grimace.  She could imagine the sibling discord that such a demand would have caused.  Whoever this Jenny was, she was made of strong stuff.  Unfortunately for her, a hostile patient would receive no benefit from merely visiting her office.  Counselling was a participatory process, and she could tell from the stubborn set of Jamie’s shoulders that he had no intention of participating.

“I see,” she said carefully.  “Well, it’s your time and your dime, Mr. Fraser.  This session lasts for forty-five minutes, and you’ve not been here for five.  There’s a carafe of hot water on the table over there, if you care for some tea.  Or you’re welcome to just enjoy that comfortable chair for another forty minutes.  I’ll be working on some administrative necessities.”

She turned her chair away from him, but from the corner of her eye she could see his gobsmacked expression.  He had clearly expected her to cajole and manipulate him into co-operating, but that simply wasn’t her style.

“I meant no offence, doctor.  I’m certain ye’re verra good at what ye do.  Tis only... well, Jenny is my older sister, ye ken.  She practically raised me.  And so ofttimes she treats me like a muckle-sized bairn, and no’ a man who’s capable of lookin’ after himself.”

As he spoke, Jamie leaned forward until his elbows rested on his knees, expressive hands gesturing in front of his face.  Hostile to the notion of counselling he might be, but he clearly wanted her to understand it wasn’t a slight.  As a physician, she had been trained to never take a patient’s reactions personally, but it didn’t mean she didn’t appreciate the effort.

“No offence taken, Jamie.  If you don’t need my assistance, I’m happy for you.  That’s one less person hurting in the world.”

“I didna say I wasna hurting.  But I can handle it my own way.  I am handling it, that is,” he hurried to add.

Unable to sit still any longer, he rose and walked over to the small table where she kept an assortment of herbal teas and a tray of Geillis’ homemade biscuits.  Bending over, Jamie set about making himself some; chamomile by the smell of it.  The sound of spoon ringing off porcelain as he stirred in some honey made her smile, reminding her of Lamb and his obsession with the lost art of afternoon tea.

“Can I make ye a cup?”

The question was so unexpected, it took her a moment to process it.  The tea was there as a distraction for her patients, to give them something to do with their bodies as they worked through difficult emotions.  None of them had ever thought to offer her a reprieve as well.

“No, thank you.  I just finished lunch.”

He dipped a shortbread into the steaming tea, then ate it in a single bite.  Instead of sitting back down, he began to browse the framed certificates and photographs along the far wall as he sipped his tea.  With his back turned, her eyes dipped to admire his ass, which filled out his jeans perfectly.  When she caught herself, she gave her head a shake, appalled at her lack of professional detachment.  Maybe Geillis was right.  Maybe she really did need to get laid.

“How long have ye been a doctor?” Jamie asked without turning around.

“Ten years,” she replied.  “But I’ve only been a psychiatrist for the last two.”

It was a dangerous topic, and she blamed his ass for letting the words slip out.  Fortunately, his inquisitiveness took him in an entirely different direction.

“Were ye some kind of prodigy, then? Ye hardly seem old enough tae have yer own practice, let alone fer a decade.  If ye dinna mind me sayin’ so,” he added quickly, as though realizing what he’d just said.

“Not at all.  And you hardly seem young enough to be a, what was it? A muckle-sized bairn?”

As he turned to look her way, she understood the expression ‘shot-gun smile’ for the first time.  It spread across his face like a sunbeam, transforming what was already remarkable into a work of art.  If she hadn’t been sitting, she likely would have stumbled backward from the force of the blow.  Scrambling for something familiar to keep her from making a very grave fool of herself in front of this man, she clasped her clinical training with both hands.

“Are you and your sister close?” 

“Aye, when we’re no’ tryin’ not tae kill the other.  Our Mam died when I was only four, and with Da workin’ dawn til dark on the farm, Jenny was parent, teacher an’ playmate all rolled inta one.”

“You’re not from Edinburgh, then?”  Although what that had to do with his counselling, she hadn’t a clue. 

“Nah, I hail from a wee village in the Highlands ye’ve likely ne’er heard of called Broch Mordha.”  She shook her head to indicate she was indeed unfamiliar with it.  Jamie launched into a detailed description of the place, his hands sculpting the landscape out of thin air.  He obviously cared very deeply for his home, and she felt a twinge of jealousy, having never known that feeling of deep belonging  herself.

“And what brought you to Old Smoky?” she asked as he wound down, her interest piqued.  It was like slamming a lead door on his previously sunny disposition.

“Family obligations.” Said in such a way as to make it clear that no further words would be forthcoming on the topic.  She regretted her nosiness immediately, despite what it revealed about his emotional state.  Jamie was most certainly grieving something, but handling it he was not.

Before she could find a way back to the easy flow of conversation, a chime from her laptop indicated that the session was up.  She couldn’t bear to dismiss him without trying to set things right.

“Listen, Jamie, I understand that you only came here today to humour your sister, but I want you to consider something.  Whether we’re grieving or angry or jealous, or any destabilizing feeling, we’re often the worst surveyors of our own landscape.  Just like you can’t know your place on the sea without referencing the stars, it takes something external to ourselves to measure how far adrift we have become.  Your sister obviously loves you.  Ask yourself, what has she seen in you that prompted her to force you to seek help?”

They parted with cordial but muted goodbyes.  The door closed behind him, leaving Claire to stare at the blank rectangle in her planner that bore his name.  No coded symbols flowed from her pen.  When the door re-opened, it was Geillis, closing it firmly behind her.

“Weel, did I no’ tell ye?  Wee fox, tha’ one.  And he told me he liked my shortbread!”   Geillis said this as though it was some kind of sexual euphemism, which for all Claire knew, it was.

“Yes,” she replied distractedly.  “He’s very nice.”

“Nice!  Nice?  Tha’ man is tae nice what Wagyu is tae beef jerky.  Have ye completely lost yer senses, woman?”  

“Yes, well, he’s a patient, Geillis, as you well know.  And not one I’m likely to see again,” she added, acknowledging out loud what she already knew.

“Oh, no?” Geillis sing-songed.  “Thas’ strange, as he just made an appointment fer the same time next week.”

Claire’s eyes flew to where her friend looked on, smug as could be.

“Yer three o’clock called tae say she was runnin’ five minutes late.  I’ll leave ye tae think about yer... patient.”

Claire picked up her pen, trying to pull together something resembling a professional summary of her first appointment with Jamie.  Her mind replayed their interaction, but all she could remember was the way his eyes crinkled when he was listening attentively, the tidy half-moons of his fingernails, the seam of his jeans as it contoured his thigh, and the cymbal-crash in her chest that accompanied his smile.

Patient, she reminded herself.  Jamie Fraser is your patient. 

[andrew-minyards-bitch]

the foxes as things people have done in my school: a thread 🧵

Neil: traveled three states in the span of a week

Renee: dyed her hair twice!! in the span of three days

Nicky: thinks he’s the happy bright soul but was later told he was the moody I want to k1ll my$31f one

Kevin and Seth: got in a fight in the boys bathroom

Allison: brought three juls to school and got suspended before stepping a foot inside the building

Andrew: slept for two class periods (we only had three days to complete the test) when he should’ve been doing the standardized test and got a pass plus on both language arts and math

Aaron (let’s pretend this was him in 7th grade): took the senior SAT test and got 1570 (1600 is the perfect score btw)

Also Aaron: had a mental breakdown over a pltw grade in the middle of math class when he got a C but confronted the teacher and later found out he forgot to check the box that said he was done with the assignment which was why the teacher didn’t grade it

Seth: cried (like full on “i am losing my shit kind of thing,, pretty sure it was tears of frustration) over the most basic pre algebra formula and the teacher had to sit down and explain for the full class period about negatives and positives in front of a number and how to solve it with an x=…he still didn’t get it

Renee: spat at a whyte boy for harassing her friend in the hallway and proceeded to slam him in the locker

Neil: manipulated the teacher so that Renee wouldn’t get in trouble (spoiler alert Renee was free of all charges)

Kevin: got caught almost hitting Andrew midair with his hand centimeters away from Andrew’s face (it was in like a joking playful matter “ur annoying me so I’m going to pretend to hit u” sort of thing)

Matt: sings off key in gym class and knows it but will not shut his mouth

Kevin: went on a full rant in social studies class about how historians fucked up Achilles’ story and reducing it to a great hero story when the whole point of it was to show that Achilles was still human at the end of the day despite his godly powers

Andrew: proceeded to bully someone for knowing “romeo and juliet” by shakespeare when they grew up in America and called them a “disgrace to the nonexistent live laugh lovers culture”

Andrew: never fucking shuts up about how “Merchant of Venice” is one of the best shakespearean play

Neil: stormed off the classroom and banged the door which caused enough commotion for teachers in surrounding area to check up on the team

Neil: ran a mile in four minutes

Aaron: wrote a hate speech about whyte male gays forgetting for a moment that he too is a gay male who so happens to be whyte (triple homicide)

Andrew: listed all the statistics on why men are the problem in the middle of the hallway DURING passing period because he overheard a random student saying women have it easier

Renee: absolutely dominated all the athletic guys in gym class on arm wrestling,, did not let them live it down

Kevin: knows every country names (and where they are located) and recites them under one minute

Neil: talks about Andrew 24/7 on the bus and got a slushy that was bought from the Speedway store near the school thrown at him

Aaron: memorized the periodic table and everything about Chemistry

[robinrequiems]

Now that you mentioned it, can I have some track star player! Damian and basketball captain! Jon 👀

👀

• Baskebtall November-march, & outdoor track & soccer is March-June. pspspspspsps! I know Jack shit about sports (:

• in freshmen year, damian found himself bored, he had so much built up on energy that he needed to release. damians not a.. team player, so he joined a sport that didn’t really require you to be a team player. track.

• damian could run okay? he could run fast. so it was perfect, so now, as a junior, he was known for winning the school track trophies but Damian wasn’t as well known as jon. captain of the basketball team, a boy cherished by the school for bringing home a trophy for the first time in years. their basketball team was bad, but then, little freshmen jonny joined

• he just joined for fun, he didn’t expect to get in, he also liked played basketball with his brother, so he just tried out. ( that’s what he said at least ) sure, at the start he wasn’t the best player, but then, during their first game? he was playing amazingly. apparently the boys great under pressure

• he slowly rose up in the team and became well known, there was always a girl or two chasing after him in the halls ( jon didn’t really care for them.. he was more interested in the track star )

• jon fell in love with damian. no.. well.. jon had a crush on him since freshmen year. why, you may ask? ..he likes his personality, jon remembers getting lost in the falls as a freshmen and then sophomore Damian going to help him. was he laughing at him? definitely.

• people said damian was rude, jon said otherwise. he may not know damain that well, but he could see kindness in him

• his team members called him a simp. he.. no.. he wasn’t a simp? all he did was defend damian

• people said jon didn’t even know damian, but jon feels like he’s known him for years.. like they were partners or something ( am i hinting at reincarnation and a potential reincarnation arc in this au 👁 or am I hinting at doing a reincarnation au? the world will never know)

• jon believes there’s more to Damian than people think

• Maya is the captain of the girls soccer team, Tai is apart of the basketball team, Kathy is a cheerleader, and billy is a football player

• damian is friends with maya and sorta friends with tai due to club activities ( art ), & an acquaintance of Kathy because Maya is dating kathy ( today is a date I ship kathymaya )

• jon is friends with tai, Kathy ( childhood friends ), Maya ( Kathy’s gf so he knows Kathy’s gf ), & billy

• damian often saw jon in the halls, jon tried to smile at Damian, but damain just ignored them. he didn’t know Jon. stranger danger

• jons last game was coming yo, the championship, damians track season was about to start soon, the school was amped up

• it was the final game and jon was so hyped

Jon: Hey! Damian!

Damian:

Damian: what.

Jon: the um.. my last game.. it’s.. it’s friday.. and I was wondering if.. if you’d go?

Damian: I was already going.

Jon: really!

Damian: yes, tai invited me.

• a slight lie on damians part

• but he briefly heard tai ask Maya if she would come, and Maya normally brought Damian along ( much to his dismay.. )

• jon eyes lit up when he heard the name tai. Damian knows tai. TAI KNOWS DAMIAN

Jon: TAI

Tai: Jesus Christ, jon-

Jon: you know Dam— d a - frick - Damian

Tai: yeah?

Jon: set us up! match make! okay cupid!

Tai: are you sure english is your first language, ‘cause..

Jon; tai!

Tai: why do you even want to go out with him???

Jon: he’s pretty…

Tai: he’s mean

Jon: he is not!

• tai did not know what world jon wad living in

• but. tai was one of jons best friends so, he of course, tried to help:)

Tai: hey, shithead

Damian: oh my god, don’t talk to me

Tai: I need a favor

Damian: no.

Tai: you owe me.

• damian did owe him, tai took him to the er one time when he he fucked his ankle up after doing something stupid

Damian: what.

Tai: I need you to wear the number 3 to the game

Damian: 3– that’s - the boys- jons. why?

Tai: don’t ask.

• so that’s how Damian ended up wearing a shirt with the number 3 on it, Maya laughed at him

• oops. but Damian didn’t really care that much. but him wearing jons stupid number started rumors

• damian didn’t really label his sexuality, jon was openly bi, do that wasn’t the problem. the problem was that they thought they were dating

• damian didn’t like that and found it annoying. you see, damian didn’t really know of jons crush, he didn’t pay enough attention to the boy, it wasn’t like he was in any of his classes anyways.

• ( tai and Damian are sorta actually good friends, they have that insulty friendship and share a lot of classes, Maya is senior, along with Billy, Kathy’s a junior w/ tai n billy )

• damian really didn’t care for jon. at all.. until he actually saw him. the last time he saw jon. he was.. noodle like.

• now? he was not. he didn’t really fully pay attention to jon before. sure he’s saw his smile and face, but oh my god.

Damian: hes hot

Maya: what?

Damian: n.. nothing. Sorry.

• he did not mean to narrate his thoughts there. Damian didn’t care for team sports, but looking at jon play? wow.

• the way jon ran around, he was so. Elegant.

• damian was seriously ogling jon. Damian has never felt more embarrassed. he hates when people focused on his looks and here he was. doing the same. he wanted to commit mass murder. on himself. right now.

• meanwhile, Maya was just trying to watch her girlfriend who was sitting on the bench while Damian was having a mini breakdown on how shallow he was being

• ( told you guys, Damian will always be dramatic in any universe )

Maya: you good there-?

Damian: no.

Maya: great, it’s half time, I’m gonna go say hi to kathy

• he couldn’t believe Maya was leaving him in his misery

• meanwhile, jon was fsngirling. Damian was here. Damian. Wearing his number. Oh shit.

Jon: tai tai tai tai!!!!!!! Thank you thank you thank you!

Tai: yeah yeah, you owe me

• jon played so well that day too, they ended up winning the game. no one knew where jon got that sudden burst of energy when he was beginning to get tired, but he did

• and he got the winning shot

Kathy: geez, jon! good job!

Jon: thank you!

Maya: thought you guys were gonna lose

Tai: thanks Maya

Maya: anytime <3

Jon: I’m gonna say hi to damian, wish me luck!

Maya: luck wished

Tai: don’t combust when he looks at you!

• tai is the best wing man <3

• but anyways damians still in the bleachers, trying to hide from the world

Jon: Damian!

Damian: yes?

Jon: thanks for coming! I think you were my good luck charm

• jon should have not said that out loud, but he did.

• and Damian chose to just: not comment on it.

• a week or something later and it’s damians track meet

• he has started looking forward to jons smiles in the halls, but he still pretends that he never sees it. he learned a few things about jon, how he’s truly a sweetheart, probably the nicest person in the planet— as long as you don’t mess with his friends, and failing English class

• but damian doesn’t have the time to pine, he spends his hours now running, jumping hurdles, jumping, and yadayada.

• he was excited. he was. he was just: wow. he was hyped up, energy was building up in him as anticipation built up for the first meet. It was currently Monday, the first meet will be Wednesday. Three days.

• and in those three days, he was his own enemy. sleep- sleep did not come easily. Not at all. His thoughts kept him up and awake, thinking about the possibilities, it was absolute garbage.

Maya: geez, you look like a zombie

Damian: feel like one

Tai: hey dude did you bring th— ooh yikesss

Damian: shut up.

• damian was 100%my grumpy that day and glared at all passing bystanders

• but jon had began sitting at Damian’s table, along with Tai ( 😡 )

• damians table consisted of Maya, sometimes Kathy, Maps, && Colin. Colin was also apart of the track team

Jon: uh, D- are you okay?

Damian: mmhhhshshshjsnm

• jon and Damian started calling each other by D and J, they don’t know why, it just happened

• jon wanted to go to damians meet, but he didn’t exactly know if Damian would like that? it was.. complicated

• he didn’t even know if him and damian were friends, they barely even saw each other minus the small times in the hallway and lunch

• but he did go to damians track meet, damian would never admit that he liked that Jon was there

[enternalempires]

Downfall of a Liar

This is a Lukanette fic. Some fluff, some angst, a lot of salt and Luka being a King of Revenge. You all get to see the more conniving part of our snake boi. Hope you enjoy! Haven’t figured out how to use links yet but my Ao3 username is the same. Basically,  Lila Rossi has gone too far and Luka Couffaine is going to do something about it. He is, after all, a Couffaine… a little chaos never frightened him.

Marinette came to him on a Friday afternoon with sad eyes and tear-stained cheeks. Her knees were bleeding and her wrists were bruised, hair messy and lip busted. Her dress was ruined with an ugly paint smear and her stockings underneath were ripped.

“I fell down the stairs,” She told him, looking away. “I didn’t mean to. I must’ve fallen into some paint.”

Luka didn’t believe this.

The wobble in her voice and the unsteady way she had stumbled right into his chest when she saw him was not the actions of a girl used to her own clumsy feet. Marinette was a strong girl and he knew how much of a burden was placed onto her shoulders. She did not crack easily and she did not do it over being a klutz or smudged paint. She did not cry over repairable things, over broken nails or washable clothes. She did not come to him looking upset and watery-eyed without feeling one step from breaking.

These were things he knew.

So, after calming her down and getting her to take a shower, offering her clean clothes and a warm bed, and letting the girl he fell in love with fall asleep on his chest to the sound of his heartbeat, he did some digging.

He went to his sister first and found out the real story.

Marinette was in the art workshop, Mrs. Bustier having set up a lesson in there during the last hour of the day, with the other members of the band as she helped Nathan and Marc on their story.

She was honestly just being nice— as Jules explained— then the bitch, his sister’s respective name for Lila, sauntered into the room and started to wail about how Mari was only helping the two co-creators because she wanted the credit for their work.

The girl he fell in love with defended herself, and her friends did the same but with most of the Akuma class— excluding the band members and Nathaniel— having fallen for her tails of woe and amazing, yet false, life experiences, they sided with the liar instead of Mari.

Then, throughout the rest of the class, the bitch found ways to terrorize Marinette (going as far and tripping her and cutting her dress with scissors, dropping her paint onto her, pushing her into things, or slamming different objects onto her wrists) and then blame her for getting in the way.

Juleka and Rose had helped Marinette calm down a little as the girl broke into tears as soon as they were away from the rest of the Akuma class but she just kept panicking— and ran away. They didn’t know where she ended up until he texted them and asked.

Then Luka asked for Alya Cesiare’s phone number and made an unsettling discovery.

Marinette and the blogger were no longer best friends.

And, horrifyingly, she had been accused of being a bully, a liar, and a manipulator. Lila painted his melody in the way that everyone should view her instead.

Finally he created a group chat with a few allies he could trust.

He contacted Adrien Agreste (because even if the boy had been painfully oblivious that Marinette had once been in love with him, he would do anything for his lady), Kagami Tsurigi and her girlfriend and spoiled brat, Chloe Bourgeois, the boyfriends Marc and Nate, and then the rest of his band.

He named it ‘The Marinette Protection Squad’ and, just like that, the war was on its way.

*-*-*

Lila Rossi was waiting in the back of the school by herself when Luka arrived. He found her hidden between one of the walls and a thick oak tree and he didn’t bother to hide himself as he crossed the grounds over to her.

She saw him, surprise lighting her features for a second before it shifted into a— what he would guess, if it wasn't on someone so repulsive— a seductive smile.

“Luka!” She squealed, sauntering up to him and stopping a few feet away. “How are you, sweetheart? It’s been forever since we saw each other, since your last year in Lycee, right?”

“I don’t care,” Luka took a step back, face emotionless as he looked down at her. His eyes gave away nothing as he shoved his hands into his pockets. “You’ve made a lot of people angry, Lila.”

“A-Angry?” She stammered, feigning innocence by putting her hands over her heart with too wide of eyes to be real. “Why would they be angry with me?”

“Because you’re a liar and you hurt the people they care about— you hurt the person I care about.”

“Oh,” Lila straightened her back. “You must be talking about my bully.”

“Your bully?” Luka scoffed, less than amused. “Sure, I’ll play along for a minute. Who is your bully.”

“She’s... s-she is Marinette,” The liar sniffles. “And she says such horrible things about me and they’re not true! She pushes me and, and she rips up my homework and she insults me. Whatever you heard isn’t true, I swear!”

“Are you done?” He sighed out, shrugging his shoulders to make them relax more. “You’re a lying bitch, I get it. I’m not here to let you try to sink your claws under my skin, not that it would work, I’m here to warn you.”

“Warn me about what?” Lila asks, voice going a bit nastier than she probably intended.

What a two-faced bitch.

“That you should watch your back,” He says simply, turning slightly to walk back to his house. “You pushed a lot of people into your enemy list by threatening Marinette and now you’re about to face the consequences. It’s only fair to give you a head’s up.”

“Marinette,” she shrieks, “is nothing but a liar and a horrible person—”

“Marinette Dupain-Cheng, no matter what anyone says, is the kindest person you will ever meet,” Luka snarled, whirling on the sausage-haired girl so fast that she stumbled back, unprepared. “And I’m hers. You hurt the wrong person, you egocentric bitch, and you’re going to pay for it.”

Lila gaped for a second before she forced an innocent look on her face, mouth opening to say something but the musician just continued, eyes hard and narrowed and angry, mouth drawn into a tight line.

He was a generally calm person, he could handle a lot before ever blowing a fuse. Because he was also a Couffaine at heart. He thrived in chaos where others wither and when it came to those he loved, nothing would stop him from protecting them.

Especially when the one he loved and had to defend was the girl he fell in love with.

“She is thoughtful and compassionate and selfless and astounding in how she will push herself to the knife’s edge just to make sure her loved ones are okay. She is a cinnamon roll but the fiercest ally you could ever have. There is no stopping her, there is no convincing her to step down when she’s standing up for something that’s right— when she’s standing up for someone, unless that someone is herself.”

He took a step closer and, well, that must’ve been pretty intimidating because she scrambled to take one back, causing a humorless chuckle to leave his lips.

He was his mother’s son but he had enough of his father in him to leave others terrified.

“And you want to convince me that just because you have the Akuma class, Mlle. Bustier, and M. Damocles so far up your ass that people will hate her? Really? Let me tell you something, sweetheart," He gave a cruel smirk, voice mocking as he repeated what she called him earlier. “This isn’t you and all your puppets against Marinette, it’s now you against the entire school. You might pretend to rule this place but she is the one who everyone looks up to and loves. She’s their sunshine child and leader and she has connections everywhere. She knows people that could make your life a living hell and it is her kindness alone that has spared you in the past. And you should have cut your losses when you had the chance because I, however, am not as kind. You declared war, Mlle. Rossi, do not be surprised when your downfall comes knocking on your door.”

With that and smirking at the ugly glare on her face, Luka saunters away, whistling a happy tune despite how tightly his fists are clenched inside his pockets.

It’s a week later when they make the first move.

Ivan and Rose, because despite her size she puts up one hell of a fight, are Marinette’s bodyguards during school. They prevent her from getting hurt while Mylene, Marc, and Nate make sure to record anything and everything Lila does that’s incriminating towards her reputation. 

Juleka is on sabotage duty during school to make sure any plans backfire onto the bitch while Adrien is the distraction. Both were excellent at their job. Almost scarily good.

Outside of school Kagami and Luka strategize and come up with plans to make sure anything Lila says can be used against her. They organize groups and make sure that Marinette and her family doesn’t get bothered by Lila or any of her followers.

One by one more people in the school help. Marinette’s friends from different classes going from the highest grade level to the first year students at Lycee all jump in when needed— when they overhear a lie and debunk it by pulling up proof or contacting the people involved directly (Marinette isn’t the only one with contacts).

One by one Lila is getting more isolated, one by one she’s losing her power.

And it’s so satisfying to see that Luka goes to sleep laughing.

It’s not even a full month before the Akuma class had fully left Lila’s side, the last to turn was Alya— the reporter so distraught over how she realized she had been treating her former best friend that she had a mental breakdown.

It was a month on the dot when Honeybee and Ryuko got video footage of Lila snatching one of Hawkmoth’s butterflies from the air with a wide grin and a “What can I do for you today, boss?” and it was a week later when her life got ruined.

(Marinette was so overjoyed that the constant terror— in her civilian— life was going away that she kissed Luka until their lungs ached and, just like that, Luka got revenge and a girlfriend in one sweep.

And that girlfriend was very, very grateful for it too. Most nights he went to bed with bruise-kissed lips and a beautiful girl in his arms. Marinette looked happier than she did in years and all the planning and frustration melted away when he saw her wake up with a smile.

He couldn’t protect her when she was fighting an Akuma but he’s proved more than enough times that he could protect her when she goes back to having two left feet.)

First she got expelled from her Lycee for false accusations, thief, bullying, and cheating. 

Then her lies— ever last one of them— were exposed and her mother was informed about what her daughter was up to and even waved her daughter’s diplomatic immunity— being absolutely disgusted with her daughter’s behavior— when the court cases of people suing her for fraudulence, harassment, threats, attempted murder, and acts of terroism.

Last, but not least, Lila was banned from Paris and all the cases stacked up against her were moved to a different court within France so they wouldn’t even have to see her again.

Though they did see her screaming and shrieking and snarling towards Luka as he joyfully waved at her when the bitch was getting dragged to the back of a cop car, “You! You did this! You made this all happen! I’m going to get you back for this, Couffaine, I swear I’m going to get you!”

She seemed absolutely insane, drool going down her chin from how hard she had been yelling, eyes frantic and face flushed and she jerked like a wild animal trying to get out of her cuffs and the officer’s hands that held her back from attacking the young musician.

He was a Couffaine and this chaos made him delighted to witness.

After all, it’s not everyday you get to see the downfall of the bitch who made the love of your life miserable.

Luka just laughed and sent her a cocky wave, “I look forward to it, sweetheart.”

Well… you can’t say she wasn’t warned.

[liviusofpella]

Eastcoast

Pairing: Tyril x MC (Selene)

Word count: 6840

Warnings: cursing, mention of mental illness, mentions of death, mild alcohol usage, implied adult activities 

A/n: I’d like to thank @cashweasel for her amazing modern au Tyril art. I love it very much and I worship it daily. Secondly, it’s a (re)collection of rather short memories (which I hope make sense in the end). Think of it as a pretty music video, lol.

Tag list: @brycesgirl @watatsumi-island​ @ejustlurkshere @ginnyginsposts @cashweasel

To say that they were completely different would be a huge understatement. They were as different as it gets, the binary oppositions in every way. Two very strong, vivid personalities, stubborn and incredibly sure of themselves, who fight tooth and claw and love like crazy. It wasn’t just about differences in their outlooks on life – it started with (and was caused by) where they came from. While Tyril came from a disgustingly rich, enormously big, and incredibly influential family who has been controlling the East Coast’s big money for decades, Selene has spent most of her life in a two-bedroom house in New Haven, living with her brother and grandma, helping with bills, working any part-time jobs she could find, and studying at the local university. Tyril prided himself on having graduated from Harvard Business School, but truth be told, he was just as clueless about life as Selene, who studied at the University of New Haven. For most of his life, Tyril lived with his family in a secluded multimillion-dollar villa in New Jersey, with private everything. Private gym, golf course, pool, screening room, vineyard, stud – everything that would help make an impression on all sorts of business partners.

How did they meet, then? It started with Tyril having enough of his family’s problems and going rogue one day. After a long day of making numerous headlines with a rather childish, irresponsible behaviour in the middle of New York, he visited a newly opened cafe where he was immediately spotted by Selene. She didn’t dare to talk to him for the first two weeks, though.

He was sitting across from her at the cafe, reading something on his phone, alternately sighing and sneering every two minutes. She chuckled when a furry cat jumped on his table, demanding some cuddles. Tyril’s head sprung up, and his intense gaze made her blush. “Sorry, it’s just that… I think he sensed you need a break. You look like you’re about to have a mental breakdown.”

“Are you always so forward with strangers you’ve just met?”

Selene bit her lip because holy shit his voice, and put on her sweetest smile before looking up at him again. “I’ve been watching you for quite some time, so I’d say we’re almost friends.”

“I’m not sure friendship works that way,” Tyril raised his brows, gently pushing the cat away. “Where I’m from it’s called stalking, and you could go to jail for that.” 

“You’d lose an amazing friend,” she shrugged. “And judging from the fact that you spend three hours every day here, you don’t strike me as someone with many friends.”

“What else can you tell?”

Feeling invited by the amusement glittering in his eyes, Selene quickly changed seats and joined him at his table. “You don’t seem to like cats, which is weird considering we’re at a cat cafe.”

“Why are you watching me?” 

“I’m a people-watcher.” Seeing the man’s skepticism and the cat’s growing demand for cuddles, Selene extended her hand and stroked the kitten’s back, immediately drawing his attention. “Many people gossip about you here and considering this expensive watch on your wrist, my guess is that you’re a big shot.”

“Don’t you have a job? Anything better to do?” he mocked, a bit irritated by the accuracy of her observation.

“Don’t you?”

The corner of his lips rose up for a second, making Selene high five herself in her mind. Having eyed her up, he extended his right hand, and Selene immediately covered it with hers. “Tyril.”

“Starfury. East Coast Investment Group.”

“So you knew.”

“No, but how many people with such a name are out there?” Selene smiled at his initial confusion and shook his hand before letting it go. “Selene. No fancy titles, but I won’t object to ‘your majesty.’”

“I won’t call you that.”

“Suit yourself.”

 Tyril was very selective of his friends. He had, to be exact, one friend. The people he was usually seen with were either annoying Harvard colleagues or the annoying business associates. Due to his family’s status, he felt as if he couldn’t trust anyone because he was just a means to an end for them. People always wanted something from him; therefore, he was confused about Selene’s motives for the first few weeks. 

They would always meet at the cafe. It was their safe space, not too intimate, but not too public. Good enough for Selene’s inappropriate jokes and Tyril’s complaining about his family. For some reason, she always managed to cheer him up with the lightness in her behaviour. Always cheery, joking about everything, and absolutely in love with cats. Or anything. To be honest, this girl was ecstatic about a new plant and the rainbow.

“So you’re basically a celebrity,” she summed up, gently stroking the back of a kitten that’s fallen asleep on her chest. Tyril found this view rather endearing though he’d never admit it. 

“Unfortunately.”

“Oh, tell me about it. Living in a castle, graduating from the best schools, and having people serving your every whim? The horror.”

“You forgot having your every move watched, being forced to always bring a guard with you, and receiving threats in the mail before breakfast.”

“Where’s your security, then?”

“Outside.”

Biting the inside of her cheek, Selene nodded. “Alright, you win this round.”

 One scorching-hot August day, having spent an entire night doing research and calculating her expenses, she stormed into the cafe and slumped down across from Tyril. 

“I have an idea,” Selene stated as she took a sip of his yet untouched coffee. 

“Hello to you too,” he snickered, lowering his book, and looked quizzically at his companion. “Did you sleep at night? Because you look—”

“Shut up,” she warned, making Tyril raise his hands defensively. “I want to offer you an adventure of a lifetime.”

“If this is about sneaking you to some stuck-up party again—”

“It’s not. Though you must admit it was fun.”

Amused, Tyril raised his eyebrow, letting Selene continue. “An adventure that we, the simple folks, often dream about. Are you interested?”

“Interested enough to hear the rest of this plan, at least.”

She grinned and quickly tied her hair into a rather messy bun before continuing. “So I’ve been thinking about what you said some time ago—”

“I’ve said many things to you.”

“Alright, new rule: you don’t open your mouth until I’m finished,” she ordered, a bit irritated. Tyril snorted, but obeyed. “We’re going on a road trip. You lose your guards and for a month we sleep in cheap inns, eat cheap food, and visit all those corny places on the East Coast.”

“Absolutely not.”

“I wasn’t finished!”

“I wanted to spare you the trouble,” Tyril shrugged. “Is this all you wanted? If so, I’d like to be left alone.”

“See, that’s why you could use a break! You need to relax!”

“I am relaxed.”

“You’re a terrible liar.”

With a heavy sigh, Tyril pinched the bridge of his nose, making Selene smile. She reached for his book and wrote down her phone number on the last page. “I have to go, but call me when you come to your senses.”

 And just like that, Selene was sure she could throw that idea into the garbage. She was bummed the whole day, but by the time she reached home in the evening, she didn’t care anymore and was set on figuring out something else. Which had to wait until the next day as she hadn’t slept in… many hours. Therefore, it shouldn’t come as a surprise that she was ready to kill after being woken up by a phone call in the middle of the night. The only unknown caller she knew was the one who mocked her for not having any sleep the night before. “Tyril, what the hell?”

“Two weeks.”

“It’s three in the morning, what are you talking about? And why aren’t you sleeping?”

“Why aren’t you?”

“Cause you called me!”

Hearing his tense chuckle, Selene sighed, feeling the tension leave her body. “Can we talk in the morning?”

“Can we leave in the morning?”

Selene frowned and rubbed her eyes before sitting up and switching on the bedside lamp. He sounded distressed and… on edge. “Something happened?” 

A really long minute of tense silence later, Selene cleared her throat. “Alright. Rent a car and meet me at the cafe at 8. Nothing too fancy, nothing that’ll break down in the middle of nowhere.”

“Consider it done.”

Philadelphia

“You wanna talk about what happened in the morning?” Selene encouraged, seeing the worried look on his face. “You sounded… distressed.”

Tyril looked around the busy square, trying his best to compose himself and failing miserably. “Truth be told… I am not spontaneous.”

“You? No way.”

The corners of his lips quirked upon hearing the amusement in her voice. “Laugh all you want, but I’ve never been outside New York on my own.”

“Regretting flaking on your babysitters already?”

“A bit.”

Hearing a muffled laugh, Tyril looked down at Selene and crossed arms on his chest. “You’re awfully serious. But don’t worry, I’ll keep you safe, your majesty. Even though you’re dodging my question.”

Shaking his head resignedly, Tyril smiled. “Alright, jokester, what’s on the agenda today?”

“We start with a coffee and then just… go from there.”

“So no agenda.”

“Nope,” she chuckled. “The most important part is getting to Miami, and having fun on our way there.”

“What’s the probability we’ll run into your stalkers? And most importantly, is my make-up first cover worthy?”

“You’re impossible.”

Grinning, Selene tried to convince Tyril to play footsies with her, though all she managed to do was make him snort. “I’m serious.”

“Most probably they already know we’re here, but we won’t see them,” he shrugged. “Though you might expect to be featured in several articles as my mysterious mistress.”

“Works for me. But I really hope they choose my best photos.”

Tyril observed her with utmost scrupulousness and a bit of amusement while she played with the ice cubes in her iced tea. He couldn’t wrap his head around how easily she accepted this part of his life. She just… didn’t care, whereas many of his so-called friends would hang out with him only to get a chance to be photographed by the paparazzi. It was a nice change. 

“You don’t care? People tend to be ruthless online.”

“That’s why I’m not on the Internet,” she shrugged. “Besides, all I care about is our lovely trip, not other people’s opinion on me.”

Walking side by side through Spruce Street Harbor Park, Selene was telling the story of that one night she got arrested and spent several hours locked up while eating a cotton candy twice the size of her head.

“So you insulted the public authority,” he concluded, side-eyeing her. 

“How was I supposed to know he was an actual cop? It was Halloween!”

“I suppose you could’ve chosen your wording more carefully, nevertheless.”

“I did at first, but he wouldn’t leave me alone, so I told him to fuck off,” she shrugged. “I regret nothing. He was a creep. Oh my—”

Tyril looked to his side and snickered, seeing his friend crouching in the middle of the sidewalk, petting a puppy. “You’re so tiny,” she squeaked, scooping the dog’s tiny body into her arms. “I love you already. Tyril, look!”

“He’s probably lost.”

“Party pooper.”

Selene chuckled and turned her head to the side to avoid the pup’s kisses. In the meantime, Tyril examined the plate on the dog’s collar. “There’s the owner’s number.” 

“You’re absolutely no fun,” she pouted. “Fine, but you’re calling.” 

“Well, this is less than ideal. And a bit cliché,” biting the inside of her chin, Selene examined their hostel room. The only room left was a single room and since it was two in the morning, they didn’t have much of a choice. “FYI, I take up a lot of space in my sleep.”

“I’ll take the cou—”

“Do you see a couch here?” she giggled. “Unless you fancy sleeping on the questionably clean floor, we’re sleeping together. Though I must warn you—if you start snoring, you will wake up on the floor.”

“Fair.”

“Don’t tell me you’re scared of a little storm,” he mocked, seeing Selene shudder with every thunder. In response, she pointed out the middle finger from under the sheets, and he laughed. “We all have flaws, I guess.”

“Excuse you, I’m perfect.”

“There she is.”

Resignedly, Selene sat up and tied her hair messily before turning to Tyril. “What’s your flaw, then?”

“Just one?”

“I don’t want to embarrass you too much.”

Tyril locked his phone and placed it on the nightstand before answering. “I’m… not a fan of open water.”

“A childhood trauma?”

“If you consider watching too many horror movies a childhood trauma.”

Just then, another lighting cut the jet black sky, followed by a series of loud thunders, and Selene cursed under her breath. “The weather app says it’ll pass in an hour or so,” he consoled, though the effect was rather mediocre. “Come here.”

Selene carefully examined his outstretched arm and the comforting look on his face, clearly warring with herself. Until another thunder had struck, that is. After that, she snuggled up closely with her head on his chest and an arm wrapped around his stomach. “To be fair, I’m not a fan of open water too,” she mumbled minutes later, feeling the need to cheer him up a little. Tyril only stroked her arm appreciatively.

Florence

“Well, we’ve been lied to,” Selene sighed, looking outside the window. It was pouring rain, and it didn’t look like it was going to stop anytime soon. 

“By whom?”

“The weather app.”

“You can’t control everything.”

“I’m a diagnosed control freak, so I’ll keep trying.”

With a heavy sigh, Selene slumped down on the edge of the mattress. Involuntarily, her eyes followed a quiet thud coming from the bathroom, currently occupied by Tyril. What she didn’t expect, though, was to find the door ajar and her friend’s ripped abs reflected in the steamy mirror. When she realized he was watching her, her cheeks blushed deep scarlet and her eyes focused on her hands. “The perks of a private gym, huh?”

He’s laughing. Good. Crisis averted. “Are you done? I need the mirror.”

As if on cue, Tyril pushed the door fully open and gestured to the empty half of the counter. “Be my guest.”

Well, fuck. Crisis not averted.

Putting on a brave (and flushed) face, Selene straightened her back and entered the bathroom, avoiding Tyril’s amused gaze with all her might. As if nothing happened, she reached over to her make-up bag and busied herself with covering the signs of tiredness under her eyes, ignoring the heat waves whenever Tyril’s lose-towel-covered hips bumped into hers, or she noticed the smirk on his face as he was shaving his chin. He enjoyed messing with her. For the first time he managed to render her speechless, and he took full advantage of it. 

“What’s the itinerary for today?” he asked before turning away to look for a hairdryer. 

“I wanted to have a nice walk around the city, visit some parks perhaps, but that’s out of the question now,” she shrugged, applying a thin layer of red lipstick. “I’m starving, though, so hurry up.”

Having finished her make-up, Selene sat down on the counter to shamelessly observe his body and the way he clumsily dried his hair. Alright, the way his muscles tightened whenever he was raising his hands. She chuckled, which drew his attention. “You need help?”

“No.”

“Are you sure? I’m pretty good at untangling hair, and it is kind of my fault.”

With a resigned sigh, Tyril handed her a hairbrush. “Just bear in mind that I’d like to keep at least half of my hair. And don’t ever touch anything with sticky fingers again,” he mocked, and Selene gave him a nudge in the ribs.

It was a new sight. Tyril usually wore his hair in a bun, so seeing how long and beautiful it was for the first time was an experience. Being unable to stop herself, she ran her hand through the soft, thick strands, marvelling at how incredibly well it suited his handsome face. So stunning. So out of her league. “Turn around,” she ordered, reaching for a hairbrush. Expensive thing. 

“And entertain me. How was Harvard?”

“Like any other school,” Tyril shrugged, crossing his arms on his chest. “I wasn’t one for partying or even living on the campus.”

“So you were a nerd,” she giggled, gently brushing his jet black, luxuriant hair. “I could’ve foreseen that. Alright then, let me entertain you.”

Selene swallowed at the sight of his bare, muscular back and bit her lip, trying to push all the dirty thoughts out of her head. “During my senior year, I accidentally went on a date with a professor.”

“You’re joking.”

“I wish,” she chuckled, seeing the disbelieving look on Tyril’s face once he turned around. “I wanted to try Tinder and I matched with this guy. We went to dinner, spent some nice time together, and the next day he introduced himself as my new professor during class. It was… an experience.”

“I’m having a hard time believing this,” Tyril admitted, placing his hands on both sides of her on the counter, trapping her with his body. 

“I would show you our texts, but I uninstalled that damned app the second I came back home.”

“How old was he?”

“34.”

“What was the class?”

“Indigenous Canada, at 8 a.m. every Friday. I finished the course with an A.”

Squinting his eyes suspiciously, Tyril searched for any signs of a lie in her eyes, but apparently she was telling the truth, however bizarre it sounded. “Fine.”

“Are you ready to put on some clothes now?” she bickered, admiring the tiny blush appearing on his cheeks. “Not that I mind the view, but the police don't take kindly to flashing.”

“Who are you texting?”

“No one, I’m googling you.”

Surprised, Tyril raised his brow and looked at Selene’s cheerful face, abandoning his milkshake for a second. “Why?”

“I’m looking for some embarrassing stories, but apparently you’re all prim and proper,” she shrugged. “And disgustingly rich, so breakfast’s on you.”

Smirking, Tyril rested his head on a hand as he observed her hilarious reactions. “Holy shit, your family’s hot.”

“Alright, that’s it.”

With a laugh, Tyril gently took the phone out of her hands and laid it on the table. “I guess you were lucky to hit the genetic jackpot. Also, the girl two tables to the left has been ogling you ever since we walked in.”

“Too bad for her, I guess.”

Jacksonville

3:12 a.m. It was still dark outside and rather chilly, though that could’ve been caused by the close proximity of the ocean. While sharing a blanket on the back seat of their rented car, Selene kept nudging Tyril in the ribs whereas he tried to get some well-deserved shut-eye. “Can you stop already?”

“No.”

Selene chuckled, seeing the irritation on his face. “My door won’t open, and I really need to go out, so you either move or let me scramble over—”

“I’m not moving, so do what you must.”

Contented, Selene made her way to the door, making sure to irritate her friend by digging her knee into his thigh and swinging her hair by his face. It worked. “For the love of God, what do you want? Because I have a feeling it’s not just about going out.”

“I want to see the sunrise from the beach.”

“And?”

“I was hoping you could go with me.”

Selene bit her lip, seeing the deadpan look on his face at that moment. Did she have an agenda? Yes. Was she an awful liar? Definitely. So considering she couldn’t lie, being annoying was the only option left to get what she wanted. 

“Will you let me sleep after that?”

“Yes.”

“Then get out,” he sighed, throwing off the blanket. 

“So what is it really about? And why is Miami our destination?”

Selene knew those questions were going to appear in his head eventually. Did she bother to come up with a reliable lie? Of course not. She could feel his burning gaze on her face, even though her eyes were fixed on the horizon, slowly changing colours in front of her eyes as the sun slowly ascended. “It’s dumb.”

“Nothing’s more dumb than your excuses to get me here.”

“Oh, shut up,” she smiled and hid her hands in the pockets of her hoodie. “I guess you won’t believe me if I say I really want to see the Ocean Drive because I’ve played too much GTA as a kid?”

“Of course not.”

“It seems you have a perfectly working bullshitometer when it comes to me,” she sighed but seeing the annoyed frown on his face, gave up. “Fine. I want to visit my mother’s grave. Consider it a part of my therapy.”

Selene expected a snarky remark. Perhaps a sneer and him turning around to go back to sleep. Anything, really, but not a nod and a quiet: “Alright.”

“I was planning on doing that when you were sleeping or something. I won’t drag you into this.”

“You’ll do whatever you want, and I’ll support you no matter what you choose,” Tyril shrugged. 

“Why?”

“You’re my friend, and it’s important to you.”

Selene nodded, having eyed him up carefully, and gave him a tiny smile. “Thank you.”

Miami 

“Any boyfriends? Girlfriends?”

Selene quickly downed her shot and grinned, looking at her perfectly sober companion. “So that’s why you wanted to get me drunk. I’ll let you know, I’m not one for spilling secrets drunkenly. But I’m feeling generous, so we can play a little game, though you only have two questions so choose wisely.” 

She made herself comfortable in the armchair and quickly typed something on her phone before locking it. “I don’t do relationships.”

“Why not?”

“My therapist said I have commitment issues, so won’t argue with her.”

Tyril eyed her cautiously, not even trying to hide his disbelief. “That’s bullshit.”

“I’m not one for relationships, believe it or not. I’m a lot of trouble, and it’s too much for most of the people,” she shrugged. “My turn. Who’s this?”

Tyril looked at her phone and snorted, shaking his head amusedly. “Just read the headline.”

“I did, but I have a hard time believing this is your mistress,” she bit her lip to hide her amusement and threw the phone aside before sitting next to Tyril. “So?”

“My ex-fiancée.”

“You’re kidding. She’s like… Miss Universe or something.”

“Not in the slightest,” he shrugged. “We were engaged for six years.”

“Suddenly I’m seeing you in a completely different light,” she mumbled with surprise painted all over her face, making Tyril chuckle. “So what, you must’ve proposed when you were… 18? 19?” 

“19,” he sighed. “We were definitely too young.”

“Is this why you agreed for this trip?” Selene raised her eyebrow curiously, wrapping her arms around her knees. “To forget?”

“I did.”

Selene nodded.

“Time for a more mundane question: why are you so secretive?”

“I am not.”

“I don’t know anything about you despite your name and some questionable stories,” he crossed his arms but seeing he’s not getting any information from her, resigned. “Fine, keep your secrets.”

“You’re telling me this because you want to share some shameful regrets, or you want me to take you to an actual concert?”

Tyril smirked. “I’m telling you this because you asked.”

“We should do a bucket list with all those plebeian things you’ve never done,” she chuckled and offered her hand. “Give me your phone.”

Once he handed her the device, Selene quickly opened the notes and started typing. “Next, you ever got drunk?”

“Not… exactly.”

“Good thing I came prepared, then,” she grinned, and reached over to the nightstand for an already opened beer. “You finish this, and I continue robbing you out of your bashful secrets.”

Seeing the disgust on his face after the first sip, she laughed mockingly. “Embrace the taste, it’s just the beginning.”

“That’s exactly what I’m afraid of,” he sighed but bravely continued drinking. 

“Soon it won’t matter anyway. Next, perhaps the most important question—you ever watched The Notebook?”

Stop being a loser and go to a concert (I recommend the queen, Rihanna, but I’m not picky. Just make sure it’s a concert, not opera).

Watch the greatest movie ever made (“The Notebook,” in case your drunken mind erased the name of this masterpiece).

Carve a pumpkin! 

Don’t call yourself a citizen of this country until you make some proper s’mores.

Read a book that will make you feel things for once and no, books on economy don’t count (The Perks of Being a Wallflower is a must, and I envy you reading it for the first time).

ORDER JUNK FOOD. And by “junk food” I don’t mean fancy chicken. I mean KFC chicken. 

Go trick-or-treating! Wear a lame costume and force people to give you sweets.

Disney movie night week because I have a feeling your childhood was all about reading Bartleby, the Scrivener and watching the lamest news programs. Also, watch some SNL.

COOK A DINNER. Open YouTube and follow the instructions. It’ll probably be stressful AF, but self-made dinner tastes amazing 😋

Go on a proper date, loser❤️ When you’re ready, ofc. But I have a feeling you haven’t done that in a really long time. 

“Do this, then we’ll reassess,” she summed up, handing him back the phone and raised her eyebrow, seeing the beer bottle empty. “That was fast.”

“I figured I’d rather get over this as soon as possible. It’s awful.”

“It’s passion fruit,” she chuckled. “Rich boys and their refined palates. Choose your next poison, fancy pants. Beer, whiskey, champagne?” Selene looked up from the fridge and smiled, seeing that he’s already a bit tipsy. What a loser. “You know what, forget that. We’re going out.” 

Selene was a good singer, apparently. Not extraordinarily good, but… good enough. Tyril appreciated her solo performances of acceptable pop songs during their car rides, even though sometimes her choice of repertoire was rather childish and headache-worthy. For some reason, she really loved listening to Disney songs and rather vulgar rap songs, which tended to draw attention. Like this one time when they stopped at the red light and a girl in a car next to them rolled down her window and joined in. Or when a group of kids waved at them yelling how much they love that song. 

That night, however, Selene insisted on a karaoke club and while Tyril occupied their table, sipping some questionable alcohol, Selene sang her heart out with newly made friends. Mostly drunk and not half as talented as her, but they had fun. And the thing with Selene was that she had a really beautiful smile and Tyril would do almost anything to see it. 

He watched her as she dominated the stage, shamelessly upstaging her companions. Illuminated by the blue light and shining with the ton of glitter on her body, she looked absolutely stunning, and apparently Tyril wasn’t the only one who thought so.

“Someone asked me on a date. Can you believe it?”

Selene slumped down next to him and took a few deep breaths, visibly exhausted, though with a huge grin on her face. He eyed the small piece of paper with a number that she placed on the table and nodded. “Too bad for them,” she added before ripping the note in half. 

“His voice wasn’t impressive enough?” he asked jokingly and finished his mug. 

“I wouldn’t know, he was hiding somewhere the whole night,” she shrugged. “But I’m here with you, and I don’t ditch my friends for dates. How’s your head?”

“If you expected me to get wasted on one beer, then I have some bad news, love.”

“I didn’t, but that’s your second beer, love.”

Selene expected him to blush and change the subject. It seemed more like him. However, considering the alcohol, their recent heart-to-heart, and the growing something between them, it was not that surprising to see his gaze slip to her lips, though it was enough to make her heart sink for a second. “Wanna make out?”

“Do you?”

“Stop dodging my questions.”

“I do.”

It was a challenge. A dare. Knowing Tyril, Selene supposed he would opt out at the last second, considering they were in a very public place, so she kept egging him on the whole evening. And he took the bait.

Despite him being a great kisser, he was also a bold one. Tyril didn’t play around – he kissed her with all his pent-up desperation and hunger, drawing her close by the neck, and absolutely not caring about their surroundings. Selene smiled mid-kiss – it was enough to draw his attention and ask what’s the matter, but not enough to break the kiss. 

“I think it’s high time to leave this place.”

Pittsburgh

4 p.m.

For the first time in his life, Tyril was drunk-ish. Spilling secrets left and right, giddy, cheery, and so in love. They were sitting on the bed, playing cards, and having a pretty serious heart-to-heart. Again.

“So what was the real reason for this trip?”

“You won’t let this go, will you?” she asked, and in response, Tyril only shrugged and collected Selene’s cards. “I needed a break.”

Tyril furrowed his brows and collected another two cards. “From what?”

Pursing her lips, Selene averted her gaze for a second. Tyril seemed to have sobered up in an instant, and she immediately regretted elaborating on this subject in the first place. “From everything. I told you I’m trouble.”

“And here I thought you couldn’t be even more vague,” he bickered, making Selene sigh, and finally laid the remaining of his cards on the messy pile between them, not feeling in the mood to play anymore. “You can talk to me, you know.”

“My parents weren’t the best caregivers in the world,” she mumbled after a while, suddenly too shy to even look at him. “I don’t want to go into details because I’m in a really good place right now, but… I needed a break from seeing my family every day. Going to therapy, reopening the wounds I never knew I had, and.... You seemed to have similar experiences,” she shrugged her shoulders. “How come you’re drunk, and I’m the one spilling secrets?”

9 p.m.

“What happens tomorrow?”

Tyril met Selene’s eyes in the boudoir’s mirror as she busied herself with finishing her make-up, and crossed his arms on his chest while leaning on the door frame. She’s been wondering the exact same thing since she woke up in the morning. What they had was unique and the further they went, the more forbidden it felt. Selene was aware of what his family must’ve thought of her, and it didn’t bother her, though she worried about Tyril. He was torn between staying true to his family’s tradition and to himself. Their little road trip breathed some life into him, made him truly… happy and careless for those two weeks, but it had to end eventually. Now was the time of serious decision-making. Were they going to remain friends? Or will their roads part?

“How about we worry about this tomorrow?”

Tyril nodded with a smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes and seemed to be the fakest she’s ever seen. Then she returned to putting some blush on her cheeks. Taking the last glance in the mirror, Selene took a deep breath and adopted the approach of fake it till you make it. She forced on a smile, blinked away the tears, and reached for Tyril’s hand. She intended on not letting it go until they had to part tomorrow.

Once they made their way downtown and got in line for the comedy event Selene managed to snatch tickets for, she got… clingy. Though her official version was that she was cold. Not that Tyril minded. With arms wrapped around his waist and head resting on his slowly rising chest, she took the moment in, breathing in his cologne and trying to imprint his touch in her brain. A futile effort, but it brought her some comfort. 

She was never like this. Her heart was the most guarded place in the universe, and yet he managed to steal it, with no effort whatsoever. This trip was supposed to be an escape, an excuse to make him feel better, unburden him and help forget the mess he left in New York. It was a purely friendly thing at first, and now her heart was breaking at the thought of coming home without him. Because as much as she wanted to ask him to stay, she couldn’t, as it would mean flaking out on his own family and everything he worked for his entire life. And as much as she didn’t want to admit it, what they had was just a fling with no right to become anything more.

Feeling a soft kiss on her temple, she snapped back to reality and followed Tyril inside the building once it was the time. During the show, he seemed to be really enjoying himself and at that moment Selene felt that her job was done. Finally, Tyril looked like a twenty-five-year-old, relaxed, and having fun on a Friday night. 

 2:30 a.m.

“I don’t think you realize how many heads you’ve turned tonight,” Tyril admitted as he closed the door and placed the card key on the boudoir. 

“Back at you,” she smiled, stepping out of her heels and taking out her heavy earrings. “There’s still one thing we haven’t done.”

Selene extended her hand and once Tyril caught it, she placed it on the small of her back and rested her left on his forearm. Tyril smiled as realization dawned on him. He promised her a dance. To teach her a dance, to be exact. She might be a decent singer, but when it came to dancing, she was absolutely horrible.

“You better tell me what to do next because I’m completely clueless,” beaming, she looked up at his face just as he instructed and slowly followed his footsteps. 

As he watched her, still full of energy despite the late hour and so beautiful, he thought that it was hard not to fall for this woman. She was the epitome of kindness, with a natural talent for making friends with everyone. Always so positive, cheery, kind. He’s seen her in all the unflattering states: drunk, exhausted, stressed, and heavily disappointed, and he still thought she was the most stunning woman he’s ever seen. 

Then he thought about how much he didn’t want to lose this. He truly considered leaving the business behind just so he could wake up to her every morning and watch her going on with her life, standing by her side, and supporting her every decision. 

Selene smiled shyly and moved closer, carefully examining Tyril’s Greek-God-like symmetric face. The cold tips of her fingers touched his cheek, examining the soft complexion, as her thumb caressed his lower lip. He was mesmerizing. Truly stunning. Hardly ever did she have a chance to take such a close look at him, but when she did, she was stunned. She was so awed, she didn’t even notice the way his breath hitched when he noticed the brown specks in her blue eyes. She knew that at that moment she was breaking her own rules, but her body was aching for his touch ever since his hand accidentally brushed hers.

“You wanna make out?” Tyril quoted her own question with a smile on his face. Selene giggled, wrapping her arms around his neck.

“I’ll do you one better – you wanna bang?”

“I’m scared to think what your marriage proposal would look like,” he mocked, but before she could throw a counter-blow, he kissed her, pulling her body close to his.

 3 a.m.

The rest of that night was restless, as neither of them managed to fall asleep for even a few minutes. Selene lied comfortably in his arms while Tyril took in the feeling of her bare skin on his and her slow, rhythmic heartbeat on his chest. 

She desperately wanted to ask what had he decided, but it was a) none of her business, and b) not the time. So she just stroked his stomach, drawing some nonsensical figures with her fingers. 

“You know you have your own Wikipedia page?”

“Unfortunately.”

“Do you mind elaborating on “turbulent love life?” she giggled, propping her head with a hand. Tyril sighed, but the amusement was clearly visible on his face. “You do look like a massive heartbreaker.”

“Let’s just say that I might’ve taken advantage of my social status as a teenager.” 

“And here I thought you were a perfect example of prim and proper.”

“Everybody makes mistakes.”

“Apparently.” 

5 a.m.

“Tell me one thing about yourself. One memory, if you will.”

“A good one or a bad one?” she asked eventually, throwing his shirt on. Tyril’s hands travelled up and down her bare thighs as she straddled him while his eyes admired her features in the faint, navy-blue light. 

“Whichever you feel like sharing.”

Selene took some time to think it over, constantly distracted by his touch, and eventually averted her gaze.

“I don’t remember most of my childhood,” she confessed, with a gaze fixed on the withering rose bush outside. “My shrink thinks something bad happened and my brain just… revolted and repressed it.”

With a heavy sigh, Selene shrugged and smiled nervously. And that’s when he finally connected the dots. It doesn’t take a psychologist to figure out she must’ve experience serious mistreatment. It was the only logical explanation, considering all she’s told him so far. That’s why she never talked about herself. She was figuring out whom she really was.

“It’s whatever. Can’t miss something you never had, right?”

 6 a.m.

Running her fingers through Tyril’s long hair, Selene wondered whether they would ever meet again. She certainly hoped so, but at the same time she was aware that his lifestyle was completely different from hers. People like him have their life arranged before they’re born, and she couldn’t interfere with that. It was a good adventure, but perhaps too idyllic to last forever. 

“Was it worth it?”

Tyril raised his head from her chest to look her in the eye and see uncertainty written all over her face. “It was.”

“Good.”

“I don’t want this to end.”

“Me neither.”

The mood became quite somber as the sun slowly rose and the realization of the journey’s end finally really dawned on them. Selene kissed his temple once Tyril snuggled up to her again and closed her eyes, enjoying the last minutes in his embrace.

New York 

The eight-hour ride back to New York was dead silent. Selene focused on the road, blocking out everything else, from the radio to her vibrating phone and even Tyril shifting uncomfortably in his seat. She had to stick to a plan. Her emotions didn’t matter.

Tyril, however, warred with himself most of the time. He wanted to respect her decision, but at the same time he could feel his heart physically break, and wanted to be selfish. But he couldn’t force her to stay. They both had things to figure out, and it wasn’t a great time for a relationship. Or whatever it was between them. 

“It doesn’t have to end this way,” he pleaded, taking her hand in his. 

“It does. I told you I don’t do relationships.”

“Selene—”

“We’re still friends. Nothing changes between us,” she smiled reassuringly and cupped his cheek, tenderly stroking it with her thumb. 

Before Tyril could further protest, Selene stood on her toes and silenced him with a kiss. A deep, passionate, tear-tainted kiss, though she wasn’t sure whose tear it was. And as the clock struck 4 p.m., she stepped out of his embrace, looking at him with a soft smile. “It’s time. You have to figure out what you want to do with your life, I need to fix mine.”

He sighed, slowly releasing her from his embrace and took the last look at her. 

“Call me when you do that,” she added quietly, slipping her hand out of his grip. “Then we’ll reassess.”

[z-007]

A Journey of Sadism (mental and physical)

I was born in the 21st of April 1992, in Jableh-Latakia. But, since my father was an employee for Total French company in Syria, I grew up in Damascus. At the age of 4, I was diagnosed with Diabetes type 1. It was very hard for me at the beginning when I was a child, and my mother suffered a lot, giving me insulin injections, which I found painful at that time, and analyzing my blood sugar to inspect what did I eat if the result was soaring sky high. I hated her at the beginning, simply because as a child, I didn’t understand the gravity of the situation. At 8 years old I went to a school that is Sunni Islamic Pre-Historic School in Dummar called -Young Scientists- something that I discovered later on to be ironic. In Syria, If you weren’t good at school, you were cursed, you became like a Boxing Heavybag. They also used Falakas, the art of whipping feet. It didn’t stop at that, simply because parents became part of this process too, using any tool at their disposal in beating their child, chair, water hose, hammer, clothes hanger, electric cables, let alone being slapped on the face in a way that I started feeling my bones were shaking, and my eyes will throw fire, or kicked in your head and started bleeding. All of this, was because my marks in Arabic, mathematics, history and geography were not good except in English. It was the best language to understand for me, and the subject in which I saw myself to be a good student. As a consequence of that, I started losing control and cause trouble to my so-called teachers at that time. Luckily in 2001, I found my sanctuary that took to a completely different world. It was the first time I saw James Bond in GoldenEye. I was so thrilled by the action sequence, the theme of betrayal and everything about it was cool. This was a turning point in my life to become a Bond fan. I also learnt how to sing rap songs like Faint for Linkin Park, and Bleed It Out. And all of my father’s friends who were French, British and Americans were impressed. It was something that I remember with a loving memory to those people. Later I watched the rest of the Bond films and the happiest moment in my life was when I found the complete DVD set in Tartus. Simply because no DVD store in Damascus had the complete set except one who was also our neighbor. The curse of buying films in Syria was that they were badly used CDs at the bloody beginning. It was very rare to have a CD converted from an original DVD. This greatest franchise in the whole world has sealed my internal wounds for not being a good student. Ironically, the mental case of mine came back to me when I was at High School, especially it was a time that determined who I am, luckily it passed with no harm to me, because a single mark changed future to some students .I forgot to mention, that the school principle when I was at the ninth grade, didn’t stop calling my parents and telling them not to spend a single penny on me, because he thought I will never be successful. But I brought a mark that was better than his children’s. In 2010, I became a student of English Literature in Damascus University, I remembered that I was not a bad student at that time with an average of 80 percent. But the Syrian Crisis began in 2011, the press was already screaming for blood and the political unrest escalated to the extent that we had to change residence. This was the bane of my existence to open my eyes and find myself in Latakia. I was simply cursed and hostile, because I didn’t speak like Alawaits, their accent felt like starving dogs, in other words, they bark. They are trivial, shallow minded wankers who had nothing inside their heads except clothes, mobile phones and narrating a fairytale about themselves having sex with girls and a horny 40-year-old women they come across and imagining penetrating their vaginas and sucking their nipples. I registered in Tishreen University at third year, I managed to transfer my documents to that platonic place. The professors didn’t like me, simply for participating in their lectures, and the fact that I spoke French, Spanish and a little bit Russian. As a consequence, I kept failing at University over and over. Moreover, I had different ideas, and University Professors are bigots and snobbish. Their opinion was the only one that matters. The impact of the mentioned earlier, had made my pain started with breakdowns, screaming my head off and security gathering around me like” what happened to you?”. Added to that, emotionally speaking, I had a horse sex drive in that Mohammadian society. Girls dressed in a way that said to male students, “come to me.”. The majority of women at that city showed their breasts, waist, legs, and what attracts me most their feet, especially, high heels, that gave them a very elegant look. For my good fortune, all I had in front of me was Pornographic DVDs and websites, so I kept masturbating from 11:30 pm until 10:00 am from night to daylight. Still wondering, how men attracted them, I didn’t have any idea, and the question kept circulating. I also hated the idea of marriage, especially that I always loved to live my life the way I fathomed. I didn’t like the idea of getting buried alive by being a bloody father and spend the rest of my life with only one Angry Factory, aka, one woman. The psychological problem kept increasing and started with depression; taking anti-depressants for a while and go back to my normal life when soothed down. I kept taking them every now and then. Students were not allowed to know about their mistakes at any cost, this was a University rule. Self-doubt has caused me to go to a neurologist who started doing me brain scans, simply, I just wanted to know why am I that stupid, for failing continuously and still I didn’t get an answer. I was always deprived of sleep, studying my arse off and my professors didn’t care seeing their students DIE and SUFFER in front of them. Everybody panicked from me, always avoided seeing me, treated as unusual man. At that time, due to the fact that I kept taking anti-depressants, they became ineffective and stopped giving me relief. Part of what killed me thousands of time when I’m still alive was realizing that I cannot become an MI6 agent at any cost. I simply wanted to do 1 % of what James Bond did, take notice, that I was not pursuing women, I was looking for action and suspense. I wanted to be stationed in the heart of ISIS or Spectre and operate in the shadows to protect Queen and Country. I didn’t like Hasan Nasrullah, Vladimir Putin who looked like a Bond villain or Ayatollah bloody Khomeini, even Ali Bin Abi Talib himself, and that’s why I was also crucified for being a James Bond fan. Family and friends made a laughing stock out of me. I started dinking excessively, and suicidal thoughts kept recurring to me. They didn’t stop driving me to bring a razor and wound myself to death, it wasn’t the MI6 job that destroyed me the most. It was self-doubt. Doubting my brain efficiency and abilities, and especially that I saw students whom I thought less capable to express themselves in English than I am. My family tried to see the professors in Tishreen University-Latakia, unsuccessfully. I simply couldn’t have any idea what is the main reason I kept failing over and over. How could I develop myself without knowing my mistakes?!!, I later told some people that I wanted to be an MI6 operative, I thought that might sooth my tension, however, it got things worse. I started attacking the professors while giving their lectures orally and physically. I also broke the classroom washbasin, and the entire classroom windows, then security staff gathered around me after 3 minutes, they were about to send me to an unknown destiny, later, everything stopped after the head of the English department told them not to take any action. The last problem I did was with World Literature professor, whose name is Noor AL Araby, she was a real bitch, I remembered studying her syllabus for a month, she told us that Virginia is not required for the exam, and she brought it. As a result of that, I wrote her three pornographic stories on the exam paper. Stories people see in Brazzers and Naughty America (Porn films companies). Everybody got pissed off, the story was about to be dragged from my house to a security branch for torture. Luckily, my uncle who was a Colonel in the Republican Guard he had connection to the President of the University, told the professor to drop out the case, but she was persistent to have my balls for Christmas decoration. She spread what I wrote her on the internet and about to send them to newspapers. My parents begged her not to and we had medical reports that proved that I had neurological and mental case. Then I was suspended from the University for years, from 2016, till now. She did all she could to destroy me to the utmost level. I was happy when I realized she got very agitated. Especially, there were students confirming that exam questions were paradoxical to the things she lectures about.

Suspension Time

At the time I was suspended it was a slow killer for me. Literary, I realized that I was the worst student in the history of the planet. I decided to follow Boxing, I remembered that I was fit enough for the game. I found out that I did well at round bouts on the ring. I could do sparring sessions, shadowboxing…etc. I was able to run at least 10kms per day, 300 sit-ups, 80 press ups and 20 pull-ups. I tried to be a champion but every time I kept persevering, in addition to that my left palm was broken and my right eye was wounded. I got cold and sick, and I realized that I had to spend at least 2 months with vaporizers, fertilizers and strong meds. I kept striving in Boxing with no success. I lost confidence in myself and felt humiliated. I said to myself, why didn’t I choose to work for the Syrian Secret Service, I went to the branches, and when they saw that I was discharged from the military because of diabetes type 1, they asked me to get lost. I was surprised when I found out that my dentist was an officer in the Ariel Intelligence in Syria, I told him the story, he said “this is not your fight, you might think that you can do well in the field, but your enemies are smarter than you, they know how they can take you down and destroy you once and for all. Second, we had people who kill targets, who can do silent killings, detonate and sabotage, whether male, or female, but they have nothing to lose, their parents are killed and very poor, working to make money, and you are a discharged, rich bastard and you want to join us. I’m surprised when you told me that. I was a James Bond fan like you, but believe me my friend, that the real intelligence work will never come up to your expectations. Once the film you watch finishes and the novel ends, go back to reality, what you look for does not exist. I realized that I couldn’t become an asset for MI6, or any spy agency in this world, I felt that I was under surveillance by my country. I knew that they could look at my messages, trace my location any time they wanted. That was not the real problem, suicidal thoughts and self-punishment ideas didn’t leave me. So, I talked to my uncle to send me to the Special Forces, or any Military Barracks to become a martyr, to take the bullets to my chest. I remembered when I drank wine bottle on my own, I told my parents that I wanted to wear a C4 charge belt and blow myself up inside ISIS. They were horrified, then I was unconscious and within minutes, I found myself inside the clinic, after I told my problem to the psychiatrist, about MI6 dream and the doubt that I’m under surveillance. He told my mother that I’m a Psychotic. I was injected with needles and medications that made me feel like cutting my head off. He also sent me to Damascus for electro-therapy (to take electricity directly to my brain). I also became a field of therapy by my Doctor, he was testing medications on me like Invega that made me shake while standing up. Hence, he decided to give me Zeldox 60 mg, second generation anti-psychotic. My only comfort was when I slept. Waking up to life while taking those meds was a curse. I lost my sexual drive (libido), I remember feeling dizzy all the time, I remember calling the doctor every time when I tell him about the side-effects concerning dizziness and loss of sexual drive, he kept telling me that what you say is incorrect and that it didn’t have any symptoms. By miracle, my father brought me lower dosage medication, life changed for me. I knew cat-houses in my city, every money woman I went to for an intercourse, they took a lot of money. They were abusing me. The sluts didn’t make me enjoy the intercourse the way I wanted. They were controlling me as well, and this is why I left them. After I told my psychiatrist that I reduced the dosage, he said that my condition will deteriorate. He confirmed to me that Chemistry in my brain was not right, then I told him to screw himself. Reducing the dosage had an effect as well. I remembered at a certain time that painkillers were like a bag of peanuts for me. And when night came I felt incredible fever in my head. I felt like being boiled alive. And I kept seeing nightmare afterwards, voices telling me that I will pay the price of reducing the medication dosage. Complete terror and horror kept chasing me for a very long time. After recovery, I logged into the James Bond groups on Facebook, they made me trivia to answer, did me a test about the James Bond 24 films from Dr.No 1962 to Spectre 2015. After I answered them all correctly, they called me Agent 00Zein. Made me an admin, and I had many friends from all around the world. In the 5th of October the global James Bond day , I celebrated with millions of the franchise fans. My great father, brought me a modern computer and IPhone X to follow up with these groups.

Nowadays, I’m not looking for immigration, nor women or anything else in this world. I have chosen to help my parents when they grow old, and help them. This is the best way I can pay them back. I decided to watch films about espionage world, read books, imagining the events and enjoy it fully and get my arse back to reality.

This is the only way; I cannot be punished.

I can imagine myself a soldier of 30 Assault Unit in Ian Fleming’s room 39 in WW2, or talking with Sir Alex Younger about my mission in VX or Whitehall. If not Sir Alex Younger, it could be Admiral Miles Messervy, Admiral Hargreaves, Madame Olivia Mansfield, or Lieutenant Colonel Gareth Mallory. And realize that” It was a matter of pride that the 00 Section has been chosen for this test. This painful experience kept coming back sometimes, notwithstanding, I have chosen to take with a pinch of salt, lol.

[mcatra]

Catra works at burger king part 2

AO3

art by quackleroys part 1

As promised, Adora had taken care of everything even though she never asked her to. Adora and Glimmer’s family as well as Sea Hawk’s parents had paid off the damage like it was nothing. In fact a sparkling new window with the Burger King logo appeared installed at her next shift, looking so pristine it almost seemed out of place in the dingy establishment. Rich people were scary. 

Catra had expected the usual beatdown lecture from her regional manager, but to her surprise nothing came. Adora took 100% of the blame and omitted Catra from the narrative, and as much as she hated to admit it she was grateful. No way she could have ever afforded to replace the door when she couldn’t even afford a whole meal at Burger King. 

Not with the $3 she had currently in her account. Right now however, she was pretending to be asleep in the back of the student council room until all of Adora’s annoying prefects left. They were currently having a meeting about the annual swimming preparations.

Usually Catra would be more outspoken to represent the students of her old school, but today she didn't want to speak to anyone. She hadn't heard a lick of an apology from the girls, who had just thrown money at the problem until it went away like it never existed. They probably expected her to thank them, and no way were they getting a thank you for something they caused.

They finished up their meeting, chatting about whether or not they should be allowed to wear bikinis or something as they shuffled out.

‘Is it really okay to just let Vice Captain sleep through the entire meeting?’ Mermista complains, and Catra tenses in annoyance.

‘Shh, don’t wake her. I don’t see you sweeping up glass until midnight from when your boyfriend smashed her workplace door.’ Adora chides, and Catra feels a little bit smug.

‘...Fair point.’

The door clicks shut, and silence settles over the classroom. Catra can hear Adora tiptoe quietly over to her.

She half expects for Adora to shake her awake, but to her surprise she feels fingers carding through her hair.

Catra freezes, trying to keep her breathing even. What was she doing?

The touch is soft, gently pushing her hair back and brushing her scalp.

She lets it go on for a few seconds, before she grabs Adora’s wrist, letting one eye lazily open. The blonde's eyes were wide, like a kid that got caught with her hand in the cookie jar.

‘Stop touching me so familiarly. We’re not friends.’ Catra says, but there's no heat behind her words. She forces herself to get up, fake yawning as she gathers up her books.

Adora's cheeks are pink, her hands bunched up around her skirt. 'Do you have another shift? I’ll come.'

'No one asked you to!' Catra replies, making her way down the now empty corridor. Of course Adora memorized her work schedule. She starts power walking her way to the school doors, hoping to lose Adora on the way.

All she wanted was to finish her shift, get a few hours of study done so she could get the damn scholarship and graduate. It was for her first choice of university, and they were granting a free ride to the top student of their school. If she could just manage that, she could get a degree and finally get a good job. Catra didn't need distractions by her rival, not everyone could effortlessly get full marks on every subject. She had to struggle for it, if she was ever going to get out of this cursed cycle.

‘Are you seriously following me to work?’ Catra says, deadpan. Adora was scurrying after her like a puppy with separation anxiety. She stops walking, watching the blonde trip over herself in her hurry to catch up to her on the street. ‘Dude I’m begging you, please get a life.’

‘Why not? I want some chicken nuggies.’ She says. Catra shoots her a look of disgust.

‘You’re going to get pimples and DIE from all this junk you eat!’ Catra whaps her over the head with her textbook. Adora winces, and almost walks into a lamp post.

‘Aww, are you worried about my health?’ Adora teases. Catra goes to kick her, but the school captain dodges it, her wide grin illuminated by the setting sun.

‘Eat a damn vegetable instead of coming to Burger King everyday! You’ll ruin your perfect figure.’ Catra shoots back, hoping that Adora would care more about maintaining her sculpted body than annoying her everyday. Wait, that wording was kind of-

‘You think I have a perfect figure?’  

The brunette can feel her face heating up, and she knows she’s blushing. She shoves Adora away, turning away so she can’t see her face.

‘Fuck you and your fucking corn-cob abs, stop eating here!!! Unhealthy shite!!’ Catra curses, but Adora just laughs, clutching at her wrists so she can’t hide her furious blushing.

‘Even when you’re angry you can’t stop complimenting me.’ Adora replies, biting back a grin.

‘Don’t make me perma-ban you from the store!’  

--

The day of the swimming carnival finally arrived, colourful flags decorating the outside pool. Hundreds of students were seated on the concrete steps, waiting to compete in the relays, or currently in line to the canteen.

Adora looked good in her one piece swimsuit. It highlighted her muscled back that was currently glistening from the pool water. Her golden hair was damp, curling around the edges. She looked almost ethereal, sparkling in the sunlight.

Meanwhile Catra sat in the bleachers in her ratty t-shirt and shorts watching her, feeling like the embodiment of that one Taylor Swift song. Stupid Adora.

Adora's friends had coordinated their outfits to match their Bright Moon house colours, all pinks and purples. Mermista's house was dressed in blue, while girls from Perfuma's house fawned around the lifeguard on duty. They had even painted their faces with coloured zinc.

How nauseating.

‘You want some hot chips?’ Scorpia asks, plonking herself next to Catra. She nods and scarfs it down, eyes laser focused on Adora’s long legs.

As the day dragged on, they were doing admittedly worse than she would’ve liked. It was proving difficult to get them motivated, and doing 3rd out of 4 houses was not a good look.

‘Scorpia, you’re up for the 100 metre freestyle relay, do not let me down.’ She pats her friend on the shoulder, glaring at the other teams.

‘Aye aye, Cap’n!’ Scorpia grins, doing a mock salute.

Scorpia was against one of their biggest competitors Huntara, another girl from Perfuma’s house. They line up at top of the platforms, and when the whistle blows she dives in.

It’s close, but Scorpia wins by a hair winning the final. Catra grins at her, and Scorpia beams back. Even though Perfuma’s house lost, the blonde was all giddy over Scorpia’s performance.

A voice blares over the loudspeaker.

50 points.

The Horde was now at second place. Catra’s heart starts beating faster, ecstatic. Now they actually had a chance at beating Adora's house! She stands up and swivels around to face her own team.

'Listen up, assholes!' Catra she barks, looking at the sea of mismatched green. Their disinterested eyes blink up at her.

'We're gonna get the most points and we will win!'

She hears a group of boys- Sea Hawks old friends, probably, mutter to themselves.

We?

Why should we try when she won’t even do one race?

I know right. Who even elected her as house captain?

‘Excuse me, what the fuck did you just say?’ Catra growls, marching over to the chad looking teenage boys in her house. Instead of backing down as most people usually did, they glared back at her. The tan one with patches of facial hair named Scurvy stands up to confront her.

‘Miss Vice Captain thinks she’s too good to compete in the relay while we do all the work.’ Scurvy says, and the boys behind him all nod in unison. ‘All of us have already competed and we’re tired.’

‘Uh, does it look like I care? Get back out there so we can beat Adora!’

‘Hell no. We’re boycotting, until you can prove you’re gonna pull your weight.’ He declares, poking a finger at her chest.

By now everyone in the Horde was staring at them, and by their defiant eyes seemed to be agreeing with him. Her position as house captain was slipping.

She slaps his hand away, incensed.

‘What do you think you’re doing, undermining my authority? If I say get back out there, then go! ’

‘Why, too scared to swim? Afraid you’ll lose?’ Scurvy challenges.

Catra grits her teeth. It’s not like she was going to admit to these extras that she was afraid of water. Usually intimidation worked, but they didn’t seem to be backing down either.

As if he sensed her hesitation, Scurvy grabs her arm and his other two friends grab the other. They're surprisingly strong, Catra's arms are like twigs in their grip.

‘Get off me!’ Catra screeches, her pulse speeding up. They start walking her to the deep end of the pool, to the sound of cheering from her house like the traitors they were.

She tries to kick at her captors, but they’re laughing, like it was all a fun game.

Catra feels lightheaded as they approach the edge of the pool. 'Stop it, it's not funny!' She tries again, feeling desperate. Where was the lifeguard when you needed him?

Scurvy gives her a cocky grin, not catching on to her fear. No one seemed to be paying attention to her internal mental breakdown, they had probably thought she was infallible. Unafraid of anything. They swing her back, and then let go.

Catra shrieks as she hits the water, making a loud splash as she falls in. That proved to be a mistake, as she inhales a gallon of water doing so. She splutters and gasps, trying to scramble to the edge but failing. Instead she was sinking, her arms flailing pathetically.

Catra couldn’t breathe, the surface seemed so far away now. She had to be drowning, water rushing through her ears, clawing through nothing. There’s only a rush of bubbles and a pressure on her lungs as they fill up with chlorinated water. People were shouting from above, but it was muffled.

There was a reason why she hated water as much as she did. Their foster mother Shadow Weaver had dunked her head into the bath countless times, holding Catra’s head in place with her sharp nails. She had always said it was to clean her properly, but she knew it was her punishment for just existing in her household. The result of that was her never learning how to swim, and a crippling fear of water.

Catra could feel her legs locking up, paralysing fear coursing through her veins. The more water she inhaled, the more dizzy she got, her limbs feeling heavier than bricks.

Spots appear in her vision, and her lungs finally give out. She had to be on the bottom of the pool by now, but it was strangely calm down here. When she feels her back hit the tile, she blacks out.

--

The next thing she knows is that a warm pair of lips are pressing against her own. They’re soft, and they kind of taste like strawberry chapstick. Her head is still swimming though, like she was still underwater. The person breathes in air into her mouth, and she vaguely comphrends Oh, they’re giving me CPR.

Before she can react, someone practically body slams her chest and she chokes. Before they can do it again she pushes them off her, she was going to throw up. Catra turns to the side and promptly splutters out the entire pool’s worth of water out of her lungs.

She can feel herself being unceremoniously brought back to life, weakly coughing out the last of the offending liquid. Catra can feel herself swaying from side to side, her hands shaking like crazy.

‘Hey!’

The person’s voice is muffled, but soon her ears pop and she can suddenly hear everything again.

‘Catra!’

Everything was too loud, too bright. There were people surrounding them, blurry colours mixing together like the weirdest acid trip she’s never had.

A warm pressure is on her side, and she hazily blinks up at the loud noise in her ear. Blonde hair, a red varsity jacket.

Suddenly she’s panicking for a whole other reason. Everything hits her at full force now, the crowd, the stares, fucking Adora out of all people giving her CPR. Her greatest weakness being exposed in front of everyone. She felt like a kid again when Shadow Weaver frequently tried to drown her bathing her in front of the other orphaned kids as they watched on.

Sweat beads at her forehead, everyone is talking so loudly and her gut is twisting and she can’t breathe.

She couldn’t swim?

What’s wrong with her?

Someone call an ambulance!

‘No-No ambulance-’ Catra stutters, keeling over. Like she could afford a $400 glorified taxi to the damn hospital. She tries to inhale, but it just comes out as rasping.

Catra frantically scrabbles at her throat, leaving long red marks across the wet skin. She can feel hot tears bead in the corners of her eyes, contrasting with how cold the rest of her body felt.

‘Catra!’

It was Adora again. ‘You have to sit up, open up your airways.’ Catra glares at her, but the blonde manhandles her into a better position. She takes in another breath, and to her relief air starts flooding back into her lungs again.

‘Everyone back away, you’re stressing her out.’ Adora commanded the crowd.

'Here, wear this.'  She takes off her jacket and bundles it protectively over Catras shoulders. ADORA is emblazoned on the back in big white letters. Catra looks at it in confusion, until belatedly realizes her drenched shirt stuck to her like a second skin so it was almost see through. She grips the jacket around herself tighter, embarrassed.

The lifeguard and the teachers finally arrive, and she’s carted away from the crowd.

-----

Catra jolts awake to a loud rattling knock on her garage door. She blinks a few times, getting the grit out of her eyes. Since when did she get visitors? The only person who knew where she lived was Scorpia.

The knocking gets louder, more urgent. It vibrates through the concrete walls of the tiny refurbished garage. Catra gets up, still feeling groggy from the fever. Adora’s varsity jacket laid next to her, still smelling vaguely like the blonde mixed with chlorine. Somehow she had made home after the swimming carnival. The last thing she remembered was collapsing onto her mattress after refusing to go to the hospital.

‘Catra? Are you in there?’

What the hell? Is that Adora?

Catra forces herself to stand up, her bare feet pattering across the cold concrete. She kicks a few cardboard boxes out of the way so she can manually roll up the door. The automatic function broke ages ago, and her landlord still hadn’t gotten it fixed.

Why on earth she was letting her worst enemy in her home was beyond her, all of the water that went up her brain must’ve made her stupid.

She only has the strength to lift it halfway, the sunlight blinding her in discomfort.

‘Why the fuck are you here?’ Catra growls, however she must not paint the most intimidating picture. Probably gave the impression of a cracked up ogre in a cave.

Adora laughs a little, as she tries to maneuver her way into the garage. She ducks underneath the roll up door like it’s a game of limbo, and to Catra’s satisfaction she bangs her head on it.

‘I brought soup.’ Adora lifts up a small plastic bag full of ingredients. She looks around nervously for a kitchen, but becomes increasingly distressed as she starts to realize this whole place was only one room.

‘So- uh.’ Adora chokes out, clearly embarrassed. ‘This is...where you live.’

Catra rolls her eyes at her attempt to not insult her living conditions. Her furniture consisted of an old mattress, a sofa from someone's front lawn, a rotting table and chair from the council cleanup, and a tiny mini-fridge and a portable stove she got from the dump, all crammed into the small garage.

It wasn’t too bad, as terrible as it was at least it was her space. The landlord never came to bother her and charged half the amount of current rental homes in the area, so all in all it was a pretty good deal.

‘Not what you were expecting, Princess?’ Catra yawns, scratching her back to return to her bed. ‘Let me guess, Scorpia told you where I lived. God knows why I tell her anything, she can’t keep a secret to save her life.’

Adora nods, placing the groceries on the table. ‘I just wanted to see if you were feeling any better after…’ She flounders, looking extremely out of place in her iron pressed pristine uniform.

‘Take a seat.’ Catra gestures to the sofa. ‘Don’t worry, I got rid of the lice ages ago.’

Adora gives her a look.

‘I’m kidding.’ She wasn’t, but it didn’t look like Adora was gonna sit on it otherwise.

Adora gingerly sits down, avoiding the odd looking stains on the fabric. They sit in silence for a minute, as she drinks in her surroundings.

‘So, the boys who pushed you into the pool got suspended.’ Her school captain says, scratching her little blonde poof on the top of her forehead.

‘Good.’

‘How’s your fever?’

Catra sighs into her blanket, rolling around to glare at the other teenager. ‘Fine. How long are you planning to be here, anyway?’

‘Oh, uh-’ Adora gets up to rummage through the plastic bag she brought. ‘Also I was just gonna stick around to um, make you some soup. I brought meds too!'

She triumphantly brings out some Panadol, only belatedly realizing that there was no tap inside to pour Catra water.

‘There’s a hose outside if you want water. You have to boil it though.’

‘R-right.’ Adora says awkwardly, but makes no move to actually leave to go outside. Instead she picks up the contents of her plastic bag and makes her way to the fridge.

‘Oi, don’t touch my food!’ Catra calls out, annoyed.

Adora pauses, the ingredients that needed to be chilled still in her arms as she opens the fridge door.

‘There’s nothing in here though.’

‘Uh, yes there is. Don’t you see that stack of bread? Managed to convince my manager it was expired, so I got it for free. Don’t go touching it.’ Catra says proudly, smug that she had finessed the Burger King system. ‘Also Lonnie never notices the condiments going missing. You can’t use my ketchup and mustard packets for your stupid soup, you hear?’

‘Catra.’

‘What?’

‘How...how can you live like this? I had no idea it was this bad.’ Adora says, kneeling in front of the mini fridge like she was gonna have a first class breakdown.

Why was she the one getting upset? She wasn’t the one who lived here.

‘Kinda rude thing to say as a houseguest, much.’ Catra scoffs, offended. ‘Sorry for not living in the lap of luxury like you do.’

‘But even applying for welfare, surely the government could-’ Adora objects.

Catra could almost laugh at how naive she sounded. ‘What, so they could catch me and throw me back into the foster care system?’

‘You know what I mean. Even Shadow Weaver’s foster home was better than-’

‘Don’t you dare finish that sentence.’ Catra snaps, her blood suddenly boiling with rage. Just the mere mention of her name brings a flood of memories she didn't want to remember. Adora looks back at her, surprised at the sudden outburst.

‘I’d rather die than go back to Shadow Weaver. You know she used both of us just for welfare money?’ Catra seethes, stalking her way closer to Adora. They’re face to face now, the blonde frozen in place.

‘I..’

Years of resentment start spilling over, and Catra can’t stop.

‘Not like you care, since you were adopted out by a nice rich family with your new sister Glimmer. Must be nice to be picked out with your goody goody nice girl persona and forget all about the people you left behind huh?’ Catra grits her teeth, she’s shaking in rage now.

She still remembers that day when the tall rich lady with the pink and purple hair decided to adopt a child to fill the void in her heart left by her deceased husband.

When she picked Adora, even though she was going to be adopted by Shadow Weaver already as her favourite.

How Catra was left alone with nothing when Adora went with Angella, the abuse increasing tenfold as Shadow Weaver took out her anger at her. No one ever asked to see Catra, with her untrusting eyes and feral mannerisms.  

‘Who would adopt me, right? What a joke. Now you come in here insulting my place when I made it here on my own, with no one to help me?!’

Adora stares at her in shock, speechless. The words hang in the air, like they were a rope choking them both. They look at each other until Catra’s rapid breathing calms down.

‘I..I’m so sorry Catra. I did try to contact you...but you never replied...’ Adora says, throat tight with grief.

Catra rolls her eyes. ‘Like Shadow Weaver personally hand delivers me mail, got it.’

Adora swallows, lip trembling. ‘I really did try to go back, I did. But Shadow Weaver told me you had run away, and I couldn’t find you anywhere no matter how hard I tried. I thought...I thought-’

A tear drops down Adora’s face, and she quickly wipes it away before Catra can react.

‘So when I saw you had transferred to my school, and that you worked at Burger King, it was like a miracle to me. You were here, and you were alive, and I was so, so happy to see you. Even if you hated me coming to your workplace everyday, or that you thought I was only doing it to rub my good fortune in your face... I just missed you so much, I couldn’t help it.’ Adora exhales shakily. Her words seemed genuine, and Catra felt her heart tighten.

More tears spill out, and this time Catra reaches over to cup her face. She can feel her last remanments of her anger dissipate as she thumbs away the hot liquid from Adora’s red cheeks.

‘Why are you the one crying? IIIdiot.’

‘Mmn.’ Adora mumbles, her hand curling around Catra’s. ‘About yesterday. Seeing you go under the water like that, I just couldn’t bear to lose you again. So I found myself here. I'm sorry.’

‘I get it. I seriously get it.’ Catra pushes Adora’s nose up so it resembles a pig. ‘You big stalker.’

Adora wrinkles her nose. ‘I’m glad you know now though. Eating Burger King everyday was awful.’

‘Then don’t eat here!’

‘But I wanted to see you.’ Adora pouts, and Catra rolls her eyes. So clingy.

‘Just you wait. I’ll take first place and get that scholarship so I can finally get out of this dump.’

The blonde smiles, but it slowly turns serious.

‘Catra...I know you don't want any help but it doesn't hurt to accept some? I'll bring food to you- proper food and not mouldy Burger King leftovers.’

The offer sounded tempting, especially to her empty stomach. But Catra forces herself to resist. She had her pride, and she knew better than to rely on Adora as a steady source of help.

‘I’m not gonna rely on you again, you know. I’m not here to fuel your savior complex, or to alleviate your guilt.’

Adora contemplates for a moment. If she thinks too hard she’ll injure her tiny brain, Catra scoffs.

‘If you won’t accept it for free...How about a trade?’

Catra raises an eyebrow, letting go of Adora’s face. ‘What do you want from me? Let me guess, same thing the other dudes who propositioned me for cash?’ She makes a lewd motion with her fingers, and Adora gasps in scandalized shock.

‘N-no! Wait, did you-’

Catra blinks, before realizing the insinuation. ‘Fuck no! I've never done anything with anyone except for-’

They both recall the CPR kiss from the day before, and they look away, faces burning.

After an awkward moment of silence, Adora speaks up.

‘How about we be friends again? That's all I ask for.’

‘Hah?’

‘Also you have to unblock me and allow me to message you!’ Adora says triumphantly, her eyes suddenly burning with intensity. It catches Catra off guard.

‘What the fuck? You see me at school?’

‘And I get to message you everyday.’  

'Once a week.' Catra shoots back.

'Once every 3 days.' Adora says. She's too close, and it's frying Catra's brain.

'Fine!' Dealing with Adora was exhausting. How on earth Glimmer and Bow handled it, was beyond her.

Adora smiles, and it's almost blinding. ‘Great! I’ll start bringing you groceries then! Plus I owe you for the whole door breaking thing.’ She snatches up Catra’s old cracked phone, and starts adding herself as a contact.

‘Wait I forgot about that! Give my number back!’ She tries to swipe for the phone, but Adora lifts it out of reach.  

‘Too late! Friendship is about not tallying about who owes who! It's equal!’

‘If I wasn't sick right now I’d pummel you to the ground.’

‘Nah you wouldn't.’  She was right but she wasn't gonna say that. ‘Come on, let’s take a photo together for my contact pic.’

Adora places her arm around Catra, angling the phone to get a good picture.

The flash blinds Catra, and when they turn to look at the screen it’s a less than flattering image. Catra’s face is scrunched up, while Adora has posed, looking flawlessly photogenic.

‘Ughh, do you have to be perfect at everything?’ Catra complains, ducking underneath her arm. ‘Delete it, I look like I’m having a seizure.’

‘Well I love it.’ Adora smiles, adding Catra’s number into her own phone. She’s looking at the photo fondly, sending it to herself. ‘It’s our first photo together.’

God, did Adora need to be this embarrassing all the time?

‘Yeah yeah, you sap.’ Catra grumbles, but she can’t help but smile too.

Flash .

‘You smiled! You smiled!’ Adora crows, grinning ear to ear from behind her phone camera. ‘And I got it on camera!’

‘I’m going to break your phone!’

This new 'friendship' with Adora was going to kill her.

[myboipotterimagines]

Hesitant - Draco Malfoy

Request: 29, 37, 40 with Draco Malfoy please?😊😊 29: “How is my wife more badass than me?” 37: “Welcome to fatherhood.” 40: “The kids, they ambushed me.”

(A/N: Please don’t hate me, but I didn’t add #40. I couldn’t add it in authentically and didn’t want to drag the story on after the best ending point. I really love this story and would love to do a part two, if that makes it better. :) )

Draco Malfoy never thought that he was going to be a father. For a while, he didn’t even think he would live to be an adult. During your school years, you knew Draco as the snobby rich kid that always got what he wanted. You were hesitant of him, even after Voldemort was killed.

You were one of the students that came back for eighth year. You never got to take your N.E.W.T.S., and you knew future employers would care about your scores. You wanted to become a professor; you felt called to return to Hogwarts and teach the future generation of wizards.

Your first interaction with Draco was in the library. You were huddled away in a corner, studying for a Transfiguration quiz. You had talked to McGonagall at the beginning of the year about your future. She gave you her blessing to take over her position the following year, as she would be Headmistress of the school.

Draco sat down at a table diagonal from where you were seated. He was taking notes out of a copy of the same book you were using. He was having issues, clearly frustrated by something within the pages. “Draco?” The boy looked up at you, tears edging his bottom eyelid. “Can I help?” He nodded, giving you the permission you needed to slip into the seat beside him. You turned the book to find him looking at instructions for how to turn a cat into a cup. “Do you think it hurts them?” he asks, his voice soft, but even. He was on the verge of a breakdown, and you didn’t know how to answer. “I don’t know. I hope not.” Draco nodded, once again. “I’ll ask McGonagall if we can skip that portion of the exam, in case it does.” You gently closed the textbook in front of the boy. “Not a lot of people are in the class. Really, only those who want to become aurors. I assume, you already knew that much, though.”

Draco shook his head. “I don’t want to become an auror.” You sit back. “Alright, what is your dream?” “I want to become a professor. Not of transfiguration, of course. Something I’m good at, like potions or DADA. I’ve gotten pretty good at it from my time on the other side.” He gently laughs, causing you to smile back.

“I haven’t told anyone, but I want to become a Professor, too.” “When we’re both professors, we have to get together and plan our homework assignments out so we don’t assign a ton for the same day. It’s just cruel,” Draco said, motioning to the stack of papers still laid across from him. “One, agreed. Two, it’s easier if you don’t wait until the day they’re due,” you replied after picking one up. “I’ll help.”

                                 __________________________

It was January when you began developing feelings for the Slytherin. Your friendship had grown steadily and you became inseparable. “Guess what,” you said, sitting across from him at dinner. Draco tilted his head. “You know I hate guessing games.” “Just guess!” “You’re pregnant?” You gasp. “How did you guess?” Draco’s face twists in confusion. “Wait, what?” “Of course I’m not pregnant! Did you lose all your brain cells after you bleached your hair or what?” “Hey! My hair is naturally this color,” he states, crossing his arms. “Okay, okay, back to my news. Professor Sprout is retiring, which means I could be head of house next year!” “(Y/N), that is amazing!” Draco said, pulling you into a hug. You slowly pulled away, looking into his eyes. You had never been this close to him. You always saw him as a threat, someone who hated you and your friends. You felt his hand linger at your waist. He was kinder, now, more humane. You could see the person that was underneath the cold exterior. “What are you thinking about?” Draco asked, his voice barely a whisper. “You.” “Why?” he asked, narrowing his brow. “So much has changed this year. I’ve lost friends, family... I didn’t even know who I was for a while. I came back this year to finish off my schooling and it was the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do. When I learned that you were coming back I was angry. I didn’t know why McGonagall would let you come back into this place that you helped ruin. But, I feel different now, so different. Everything I thought about you was wrong, and I’m sorry.”

“Thank you,” Draco said, his voice thick with emotion. “I hated the person that I was, and I am trying so hard to become better. I want a future. I want a family. I want...” Draco paused, considering his words. You held his hand in yours. “Just say it,” you whispered. “You.”

                                  __________________________

Draco proposed within a year.

You sat cross-legged on your bed, turning through pages of worn-out textbooks. Draco sat on the floor below you, brewing a potion that you had never heard of. You were both hired on as professors, Draco as potions and yourself as transfiguration. Harry had taken the position of Defense Against the Dark Arts professor. You were all proud Heads of House, as well.

“What’s that potion supposed to do, again?” you asked, distracting yourself from your lesson plans. “It’s not one you take internally. Basically, you throw it on the ground and fireworks appear directly above wherever the glass shattered. George sent me the instructions.” “George Weasley? I didn’t know you two were close.” “We weren’t until recently. I wanted to right my wrongs and make peace by him. We aren’t quite friends yet, but we’re working on it.” Draco looked up at you from the potion, giving you a small smile. “I think it’s done. Do you want to go try it out with me before I show it to my class?” “It’s almost dinner time. All of the students will be in the courtyard. What if it goes berserk or something?” “Come on, (Y/N), you have to have a little more faith in Georgie and me,” Draco smiles, pulling you off the bed.

You make it to the center of the courtyard, “the perfect place”, as Draco calls it. A crowd had gathered around you to watch the fireworks, including Harry and Headmaster McGonagall. “Draco, if this thing doesn’t work you’re going to be in so much-”. Your eyes meet with Draco’s, who slowly drops down on one knee.

“(Y/F/N), you have brought so much meaning into my life over this past year. You give me inspiration in everything that I do. You are the best thing that has ever happened to me,” Draco says, his voice cracking. “Will you marry me?” “Yes!” you cry, pulling Draco into a kiss. Cheers surround you and fireworks crackle above. “I love you,” you whisper into Draco’s chest. “I love you more.”

                                 __________________________

It took five years for you to become pregnant. After thousands of tears over a singular line, you shed tears for a set of two. You sat on the bathroom floor alone, clutching the pregnancy test in your hand. You had been trying for a baby for three years, and you held the proof of your baby’s life within your hands. After leaving your bathroom, you dropped the pregnancy test into the pocket of Draco’s robes he would be wearing for dinner. You hoped that he would find the test as soon as he put the robe on. It was simple, but that’s what you wanted.

When Draco entered your room, he broke into sobs. You ran to him, wrapping your arms around his shaking body. You gently pulled him to your bed, sitting both of you down. “What happened?” “Hermione asked me to come speak to her History of Magic class about the Battle of Hogwarts. She explained to them about how I was on the side of the Death Eaters. I thought that I had moved on from my past, that I was more than it, but I don’t think I am.” “Draco, you are so much more than your past. I have seen you change and grow. You have become someone that I love and respect, so much. You care for others and you care about others. Hermione wanted you to speak to her students to show that whatever situation you are in, you can always overcome it.” “What if those students never look at me the same? What if they see me as a monster?” he asked, spitting out the last word. “They won’t because they have no reason to.” You stood up, grabbing the pregnancy test from the robes. “They see you as what you are: a good professor, a great husband, and,” you pause, handing Draco the test, “a wonderful father.”

Draco’s hand shook as he took the test from your hand. “You’re pregnant?” he asked, eyes tearful. You could only nod, now crying as well. Draco let out a laugh, pulling you into a hug. “We’re going to be parents.” “Yeah, we are!” you exclaim, now laughing as well.

                                 __________________________

In nine months, you welcomed Scorpius Malfoy into the world.

It had been a long labor and you felt yourself drifting off to sleep, your son barely in your arms. Draco rested his hands on your shoulders, looking down at his child. “I can’t believe you did that,” he said, his voice barely a whisper. You looked up at him and smiled gently. “How is my wife more badass than me?” he laughed, wiping his tears. 

“Do you want to hold him?” Draco nods viciously, holding out his hands. You gently transfer the baby into his arms. “Careful with his head.” You don’t even know if he heard you. As soon as he settled Scorpius into his arms, he was in his own world. You had never seen him so happy. When he finally looked at you, he broke into a wide grin. You smiled back, “Welcome to fatherhood.”

[agentnico]

The Prom (2020) Review

Last musical film I watched was Cats. That is all.

Plot: A troupe of hilariously self-obsessed theatre stars swarm into a small conservative Indiana town in support of a high school girl who wants to take her girlfriend to the prom.

Ah Christmas, the perfect season to enjoy the festivities, where one can go spend time with their families and friends and loved ones, go to the local pub with your mates, have a German sausage at the city Christmas market, sing carols and go to parties, check out the big Christmas releases at the cinema.....oh wait, sorry, that’s me talking about normal Christmas. We are in Christmas 2020 where the holiday isn’t really a holiday and the biggest Grinch of them all - Coronavirus (oh yeah, I said the C word!!) - is here to steal the fun. But hey, at least Netflix has stepped up to provide us with a major merry musical, and following that totally accidental piece of alliteration, I’m gonna talk about it!

Right, anyone here doesn’t like musicals? Anyone? Lets see some hands, come on, don’t be shy? Ah, there you are! Well, to you sweet peeps I have to bid a swift adieu, as you don’t need to read further on into this review. If you don’t like musicals, you are not going to find any enjoyment in The Prom, as it is as musical as musicals can be. It’s over the top, whimsical, colourful, with many cheesy songs and big set pieces, with folks jumping into distinctly choreographed dance sequences without a care in the world. If you’re into that kind of stuff, you guaranteed to find the movie a least bit delightful. It’s in no way ground-breaking for its genre, this musical is not going to reinvent musicals going forth, but there is nothing wrong with staying old school. The movie plays it safe, and rightly so, and you’re left with a jolly show for the end of the year. 

That said, its not perfect. It is a bit too long and certain parts drag quite a bit, and also don’t get invested in too many characters, as you don’t see much of them. Most of the actors are doing a solid job, but they simply aren’t provided with enough screen-time to leave a strong impression. Also, certain things don’t make sense. For example, characters become friends too quickly in this thing. The main high-school girl and Nicole Kidman’s character become besties out of nowhere and during a breakdown the girl confides in Kidman like they are old time buds. Look, I get that getting lost in Nicole Kidman’s eyes is very very easy, but let’s think realistically here. Like, the girl only met Kidman a day ago, and hasn’t even interacted with her much, and all of a sudden she allows Kidman to stay over at her place for a few days like they are childhood besties Tom Sawyer and Huckleberry Finn! Okay, I feel like I may be looking into this too much, but dammit, I like logic and this is not logical! Then again, this is just a silly little musical so maybe I should just be quiet. But no, I shall not be silenced!! I shall nit-pick this thing and you cannot stop me! So, moving on, the film’s main message is about acceptance and love and being true to who you are. Its a good message and I respect the movie for it, but as typical with other Ryan Murphy productions, it becomes too preachy. I totally understand that activism can be important, but when you are bashed over the head with it every single second, you end up feeling like you’re in some seminar rather than what is supposed to be an enjoyable movie. Also, the movie is predictable. If you read the plot, you can guess exactly how things will pan out. There are no surprises there! So save the WOW factor for when you open your Christmas presents instead.

The soundtrack is good. Look, it’s not the best musical I’ve heard, but there are some very catchy tunes here too. “Tonight Belongs to You” and “Love Thy Neigbour” are proper showstoppers, but my favourite one was actually one of the slower numbers. Midway through the film, Keegan Michael-Key (on top form by the way) sings a song about escapism and how the arts and theatre provide a temporary form of freedom and expressionism that cleanse one’s mind from the problems of the real world. It was especially powerful hearing it now, when due to the pandemic so many entertainment venues have been forced to close, causing a lot of them to lose money and go out of business, and as such looking at a future where entertainment and the arts will never be as they were before is scary and frightening. 

Let’s talk about the elephant in the room. No, I’m not insinuating anything about his size, but I am indeed talking about James Corden. Upon release this movie was hit with controversy over the casting choice of James Corden as a gay character. Look, it is a long running debate of whether actors such play roles that are of a different sexuality. In my eyes, I think that any actor has the right to play any role, as long as he provides a quality performance. Personally for me, I think Corden did a good job. Having had experience working on Broadway before, as well as his work on his talk show, he’s got the vocal chords and the showman qualities to play this character to the fullest. And yes, you can assume that he may be offensive with his portrayal of the gay character with the stereotypes, however if you look at the original Broadway performance of The Prom, the character there is played really flamboyantly and campy too. So in my eyes if that is how the character was written, Corden was simply working with what he’s been given. Again though, I myself am not a gay man, so maybe I am missing something here. Nevertheless, I thought James Corden wasn’t bad at all.

All in all, The Prom is an old-school silly musical with a good message and all the sparkle and gloss one can take, and though uneven and rough along the edges, this one can be enjoyed for what it is. 

Overall score: 6/10

[shoshanaxmoore]

SHOSHANA RAY MOORE. fc: zoe kravitz. 30. Female. She’s lived in Silver Lake for 17 years, on and off. Moved to New York when she was 19, then moved back to Silverlake at 25. She is originally from Aberdeen, Washington. She is a DJ at Los Globos and a part-time dog walker. In her downtime she loves to volunteer at the local animal shelter and she also enjoys competing in roller derby competitions and painting portraits of people she met throughout her day. She rents a house on Redcliff Street, and if you see a bunch of stray cats waiting for food outside of her home, no you didn’t. 

BREAKDOWN:

Trigger Warnings: bullying, car accident, death, drug addiction.

Shoshana is born to Fidel and True Moore. She is their second child.

Shoshana is diagnosed with auditory processing disorder, and begins wearing a listening device in school, at the age of 8. Which she ultimately gets bullied for, and she refuses to wear it in high school.

Shoshana and her sister are placed in private school, which was demanded by their father, who wanted his daughters to thrive and gain access to the best kind of education that would benefit his plans for them to later attend ivy league schools.

The Moore’s relocate to Silverlake, California for Fidel’s work and the girls are sent to public school for the first time without realizing it was due to the fact that Fidel took a pay cut for the move.

Shoshana found herself leaning towards a more creative lifestyle, unlike her sister, whom she knew was the favorite one amongst them. Going against her father’s wishes, Shoshana signed up for a music class, as well as an art class. But, she kept her grades up to appease her father and worked a job after school to avoid questions.

A month before graduation, Shoshana’s older sister had been in a horrible car accident in Massachusetts, where she was attending Harvard University.

Unable to live up in the shadow of her sister, Shosh took off for New York, to live with her grandfather, a well-known record producer back in the day, whom she had a wonderful relationship with.

While in New York, Shosh falls into the wrong scene, and with the death of her sister still weighing on her, she finds comfort in late night partying and recreational drug usage. She loses herself.

After years of battling a drug addiction, Shoshana’s grandfather pays for her treatment, and helps her get back onto her feet. She attends therapy, including art therapy and many group sessions of DAA. Her passion for music is reignited and she begins putting together mixes and does a few shows here and there.

Has a short-lived romance with a man she knew for only a few years. He proposes and she denies him for reasons she doesn’t quite understand, but she decides it’s time to move back home to Silverlake.

Becomes a somewhat well-known DJ around Silverlake, but couldn’t seem to branch outside of that. Instead of dwelling on self-doubt, she got a job at Los Globos and continues DJing there to this day.

Receives news that her Grandfather had unexpectedly passed away, but had left her the rest of his inheritance, which she used to buy new DJ equipment and donate to her old high schools music program.

She continues to DJ, but also decided to start a dog walking side gig to make some extra cash. Shoshana also began roller derby as a way to work out any pent-up aggression she may have built up. She continues to paint and sometimes enters local galleries to get her artwork out there.

USEFUL LINKS: 

Basics

Timeline

Established Connections

WANTED CONNECTIONS: 

please message for a connection discussion :) || most will be highly based on actual muse chemistry.

trigger warnings: mention of an almost overdose.

almost fiance: They met in DAA, he was her sponsor and it was kept a secret, up until their breakup. They dated for a good chunk of the year, did have a spat that turned into a short-lived, three day breakup. This relationship was the closest she had ever gotten to anyone and she shared things with him she hadn’t spoken to anyone in years. But, when he got down on one knee to propose, well, scared her. So much so that she denied him and left back home to Silver Lake without an explanation.

step-sibling: Her dad remarried two years ago, and Shoshana gained a new sibling because of it. Because she still mourns her sister at times, she hasn’t been able to bring herself to fully form a relationship with her new found sibling. 

clients: When she’s not djing down at Los Globos, Shoshana is very much busy with running a small dog walking business through the local animal shelter where she volunteers. She lives for animals and it also brings her a sense of peace. So if you have a puppers, she’s in want of walking them. 

best childhood friend: Although she moved away without a word to most of her old friends, after her sister passed away, this friend and Shosh managed to keep in touch throughout the years, and maybe they even went out of their way to visit Shoshana whenever they were able to. If anyone knows Shoshana, it’s them and it left them feeling helpless when they found out about her almost od. Shoshana is now trying her best to make it up to them and never wants to disappoint them ever again.

roller derby squad: Having only joined at the beginning of the year, Shoshana finds herself enjoying the time she’s had, despite all the bruises she’s already endured. And the girls she’s met already have become great friends of hers and they often go out together for drinks or dancing or meet-ups at the local skate park for some light skating.

friends she lost touch with: This was another good friend of hers from high school, but after she left she ceased all communication, causing them to become hurt and confused. After she returned she tried to make amends, but it wasn’t as easy as she thought.

the hook-up: She hasn’t been on the dating scene in some time, but that doesn’t mean she can’t have a good time...sort of. She doesn’t do this often, and it was a poor lack in judgment on her part. However, it wasn’t just once that the two found themselves tangled together. It was nice to feel something other than loneliness for once, and it was even nicer that someone wanted that from her.

the down for anything: In an attempt to always stay busy, Shoshana is in need for someone who is always down for anything. She is always searching for new places to explore or new things to do. She needs someone who is able to meet her before sunrise for an early morning surfing session, or someone who is willing to sign up for pottery classes with her or attend hot yoga or paint nights with her. 

neighbor(s): She lives on Redcliff St., in the house with the matte emerald green door (she needed to spruce up the place). Shoshana is a good neighbor, who always seems to be in her opened garage painting while waving to all who walk by. She’s probably offered a helping hand before, or knocked on your door before to drop off some tomatoes she grew in her garden.

los globos friend: She’s there every other night, I’d imagine djing, so she’s probably seen the same people in there constantly. Maybe yours approached her on multiple occasions to chat or hang out or maybe even offered to break down her set with her, or walk her to her car. She’s happy to see a familiar face in a crowd full of strangers.

friend(s): Those she can either text or call to go see a movie, or come over and help her move furniture around, or just hang out and play a board game with some drinks. 

OTHER:

Very excited to be back here and write again (did have my other trash children here: evie, reeoh and indy once upon a time...). 

I’m all for connections and plotting, if you have me on discord HMU, or shoot me a message here for it and I’ll be HAPPY to give it to you, since Tumblr Messenger can be a real pain sometimes. But yeah, like this and I’ll come find you! :))  

[hwangdol]

l.jn: just shoot your shot

summary: can jeno just be confident in himself? pls? pretty pls? 

pairing: student-athlete!jeno x tutor! (fem) reader

warning: PROCEED WITH CAUTION! GRAMMAR MISTAKES! AND CRACKHEADS! ALSO CURSING! i’m back and i’m not dead so here’s some athlete!jeno that everyone was looking forward too. just a reminder, this is apart of my collab with @huangsren so check out her art-hoe! renjun and childhood-friend! chenle in our dreamies highschool au. i’m not really satisfied with this piece compared to my other two. hopefully, this still slaps. also, there will be for sure a second part to this so yuh. enjoy. 

okay so let’s get this straight lee jeno is THAT guy whose in like all of the sports teams on campus 

basketball, baseball, football, soccer, track and field, cross country, pickleball, etc he’s on them all 

he was deadass about to join the cheerleading team just so he could have the clout of being on all of the teams 

ngl imagine a cheerleader!jeno,,,hell yeah that’s my shit

but he didn’t bc he isn’t as big of a crackhead as one like to think

jeno has the reputation of the silent cold guy, but in actuality is a big FLOOF ball especially with his close friends (aka jaemin) 

he’s well-liked by everyone bc he’s hecka nice once they look pass that cold exterior and he’s realllly hot.

just picture sweaty!jeno after practice using his shirt to wipe off his sweat allowing everyone to have a glimpse of his abs. 

sign me the fuck up

he’s just extremely shy and socially awkward so he doesn’t really know how to interact w people when he meets them for the first time so a lot of people just think he’s that distant, angsty type 

it still shocks a shit ton of people when they find out he’s best friends with the social butterfly/ fboi! jaemin but don’t get him wrong bc he doesn’t go around town breaking hearts left and right like his best buddy does

as much as jeno likes to deny it, he is a ROMANTICIST

way back in freshmen year, jeno was captivated by a teenage romance which he blames ara (from fucq-boi! jaemin au) for roping him into all those barbies and chick-flick movies. 

like his heart flutters at the idea of his significant other wearing his jersey to his games or sharing a milkshake at the local ice cream parlor,,,he wants to give them his hoodie and cuddle on the couch (hopefully watching barbie princess charm school) 

BABY BOY JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED ! 

but he doesn’t want it to be superficial like what jaemin does 

he highly disapproves of jaemin’s casanova ways

jaemin is probably really glad about the bros before hoes rule bc he would have lost jeno a long time ago with all of the girls he goes through 

jeno knows that love is a delicate thing and should be treated seriously which is why he’s so against jaemin’s date and ditch 

and jeno wants to be in a relationship! but he can’t bc he has like NO time for the lovey-dovey highschool bs (also bc he’s highkey scared that he might ruin any relationship he gets himself into)  

the boy has back to back practice from all the sports he decided to take on

on multiple occasions, different practice times interfere with each other and instead of just missing one like he SHOULD, jeno decided to take em both on at the same time

catch him sprinting from the soccer field to the football field back and forth in between break times

one time, basketball and swimming practice collided w each other so jeno thought it was smart to go back and forth from the school’s pool to the gym after he’d finish a 1000M IM set and shot at least 15 3-pointers 

let’s just say he flashed a lot of people, running half-naked with only his drag suit on when he forgot to put on his sweatpants in one of his runs back and forth

art-hoe! renjun never lets him live it down much to his embarrassment 

“remember that one-time jeno displayed his junk to the whole student body? good times, good times” 

cue jeno throwing a pencil at renjun or chasing him down the halls 

jeno’s abs were the talk of the school for at least a whole month and our boi had red cheeks every time he heard someone talk about it 

because of that jeno double-checks, quadruple-checks to make sure that his pants are on before booking it to the gym to shoot hoops 

ALSO 

another reason why a lot of people find jeno so intimidating and hard to approach was bc of the fight that happened between his ex-friend! stoner-boi!haechan sophomore year

no one expected that the calm, seemingly unbothered jeno could throw punches that hard. it was like he transformed into the hulk or something 

except jeno didn’t like the new reputation he gained over a stupid fight with his once close friend. 

there’s one nasty habit that jeno can’t seem to let go of no matter how much jaemin and renjun tell him to fix

the boy holds onto grudges like there’s no tomorrow

there was one time where jaemin had to borrow jeno’s phone for something and he accidentally dropped it

“hey can i borrow your phone to call someone? mine’s dead.” jaemin asked him.

“no, last time i gave it to you, you cracked it” 

“dude! it was one time” 

“say that to my cracked screen” 

“for goodness sake, jeno, i only cracked your screen protector!” 

“still you broke it”

yeah, jaemin never got to use jeno’s phone ever again. 

someone didn’t give back the pencil he lent them? he doesn’t even look in their direction until jaemin nags him enough to just let it go 

which is probably why he and haechan still vehemently hate each other even though renjun and jaemin are ready to go talk things out with haechan 

some part deep down insides knows he should just let it go and actually talk things out with haechan on why he initiated the fight bc haechan was once someone jeno considered as a bro 

and jeno doesn’t give out bro passes as easily 

he just doesn’t know how to approach haechan or if haechan would even be willing to talk it through 

it’s kinda sad how the two of them don’t even look each other in the eye or acknowledged each other existence anymore 

other than that jeno is practically flawless, jk 

as much as he is very enthusiastic in physical education, when it comes to math, science, etc, jeno is basically flunking. like borderline passing in all of his classes 

he was for sure failing math though which is a HUGE problem…bc to stay on any team sport, he CAN’T be failing a class 

which is why jeno was currently spending his free period, in the library, furiously erasing his wrong answer for the problem he tried multiple times to solve. it was the first math problem on the remedial work packet that his math teacher gave him for extra practice. 

even his friend, smartass renjun gave up on helping him and went to go toy around with his telescope, going on a tangent about renjun’s alien conspiracies theories.

if only jeno could have renjun’s genius brain, life would be so much easier

slamming his head on the table, jeno let out a low groan of frustration at whoever decided that it was a good idea to mix number and letters together.  

“dude, can you not?” he heard someone say from next to him. 

he lifted his head to take a peek…and this is where you come in, glaring at him with murder on your mind 

jeno’s just staring at you and the fool does not recognize you at all 

NCT High isn’t a big place either so he would have come across you once or twice, but you were simply a new face to him. 

you, at this point, grew annoyed at the boy who was just shameless staring at you. 

“is there something on my face?” you asked with a raised eyebrow 

slowly he shakes his head ‘no’ 

“keep it down, i’m trying to sleep” you warned him before laying your arms now with your head resting on it, faced away from jeno. 

jeno, who was awe-struck for second at your frank personality, decided that it was time to have another go at the problem and looked at it again

yeah there was no way in hell he was going to be able to solve it, he was too fucking lost 

atm jeno is like .000000001 seconds away from having a mental breakdown because if he doesn’t pass his test this friday he’s going to be benched and if he fails the class then he loses his status of team captain and his spot on the soccer team which he cannot afford to bc it was SENIOR year and he should be living in all of his sports glory right now 

and what if he can’t graduate? he can’t be a super senior like lucas wong like nooo that can definitely not happen

literally, jeno, stop freaking out - sincerely admin minnie

suddenly while he was having an overthinking session, his paper and pencil were taken away from him. he watches as the culprit (you) quickly solve the problems on the piece of paper in record time with wide eyes

letting out a small huff, you gave him back the paper wordlessly before going back to your previous sleeping positions hoping to get back to your precious nap time. your actions leaving jeno’s mouth opened in awe as his eyes glances back and forth between the answer sheets and the ones you provided him, both matching up perfectly with no mistake 

he looks back at your sleeping form and wonders if you’re an actual prodigy like renjun 

but jeno also feels really bad for disturbing your nap so he lets you be and tries to quietly work on the other problems and review how you solved the ones he had trouble on earlier 

except he’s even more confused bc there was more numbers and letters;; no comprendo 

jeno’s brain: ajadkf;dskjhg;ajdsvf;

he contemplates ask you for help or a basic explanation since there was no way that jeno learned how to solve that in class (he did, he just slept through the lecture because he was dead-beat tired after a heavy soccer practice from the night before) 

jeno’s fear of flunking overweighed his social awkwardness so he pokes you gently with his pencil eliciting a grumpy “what do you want, now?” from you

gulping, jeno mumbles a small “can you help me, i don’t understand how you solved this” 

you looked intently at jeno not answering his questions causing the boy to instantly regret asking, but surprisingly you replied 

“what don’t you get?” you rubbed the sleep out of your eyes and shifted towards the male 

“i don’t even know what i don’t know”

i felt that jeno. i felt that. 

he pulls the piece of paper between the two of you and points to a problem that you did with ease 

“oh, so you’re so supposed to…” you launched off into an explanation filled with math terms that adds more to jeno’s confusion 

sensing that jeno still wasn’t understanding, you let out a big sigh 

“sorry, it just doesn’t make sense in my head” jeno admitted shyly

at first, you were gonna say something snappy about how even an eighth-grader could do this problem easily, you held it back because you actually felt bad since jeno was trying so hard

you also weren’t going to deny that lw jeno looked quite cute with that adorable slight pout on his face 

“let’s just take it slow, i’ll explain step by step” 

so you did just that, patiently teaching the methods and theorems to jeno who constantly made that confused noise every time you introduced something new to the table

the two of you worked through five of the worksheets and jeno was actually understanding it! horray! 

you were explaining the last problem to jeno when he stops you with a question that was completely off-topic 

“why are you helping me?” 

it was simple question so you answered it simply. 

“because you looked like you need it.” you shrugged “i was trying to take a nap earlier but it was too loud for me with your constant erasing” 

“sorry” jeno said looking down at his lap, embarrassed that he was a nuisance to you  

you kind felt bad ngl so you quickly reassured him 

“don’t worry about it. you remind me of my idiotic friends, not that you’re an idiot though. actually, no comment.” 

we love a blunt y/n. 

you clicked the pen you were holding and placed it down, “i moved here a couple months ago so i barely know anyone. now that it’s senior year, everyone already has their own friend group so why bother trying to join them?” 

jeno makes another confused noised at your blunt statement. 

you wondered if that particular noise has some type of effect on you due to the fact that you have a sudden urge to explain your situation to the boy you hardly knew for more than the hour

“i used to go to miroh high, but my dad got a transfer here so he decided to enroll me at this school without my say. i left all my friends back there sadly” 

“that sucks,” was all that jeno could say.

damn his inability to socialize like a normal human being. 

you nodded, “yeah, it does, but it’s not that bad. my friends make an effort to come down here most weekend and sometimes i drive up there too.” you turn to look at him and jeno freezes at the sudden eye contact “actually, you remind me of my friend hyunjin. he was kind of a ditz in anything that wasn’t sports” 

“wait, how do you know that i play sports?” jeno asked confused 

“dude, everyone knows that you’re the school’s mvp.” you said as if it’s obvious “you’re not as intimidating as they say you are though.” 

damn it 

he was hoping you had no idea who he was so that could relieve his guilt of not knowing who you were despite being in the same graduating class.

at the same time, he was glad that he seemed to have made a good impression on you  

“don’t worry, i won’t spill your little secret” you gestured to the worksheets which had red pen markings all over it, signs of jeno’s failures. you figured that the school’s star jock didn’t want the school knowing his inability to solve basic 12th-grade math problem 

you reached under the table to grab your backpack, causing jeno to reach a hand out to grasp your wrist 

“wait, where are you going?”

 a part of him was afraid that he was going to forget everything you taught him once you left, but the other part was extremely curious about you and wanted to know more

“i have somewhere to go?” you looked down at his hand and back up at him “you have something else you want to say?” 

sensing that his grip was making you feel uncomfortable, he quickly pulled his hand away. rubbing the back of his neck. he avoids your eyes, opting to stare at your feet instead. 

“this might be a little weird, but can you please tutor me? at least until next week when i have to take my make-or-break test.” jeno plead, embarrassment rushed to his cheeks in the form of a red blush when he realized how desperate he sounded. 

you let out a tiny giggle, totally different from your persona earlier. 

you took his pencil that was laying on the table to scribble something on the corner of his worksheet. patting his shoulder, you quickly left the boy staring at the piece of paper. 

don’t get confused (127) 312-0325 :)

a stupid smile made it’s way onto jeno’s lips as he quickly packed up his things in haste. he practically skips to soccer practice. maybe he even heel-clicked.  

lee jeno is not failing math! 

cute tutor acquired! 

woohoo! 

but also, there’s this weird tingly feeling that jeno has inside. 

he doesn’t know what exactly it was but most likely it’s probably the reason why he was a goofy-ass smile on his face 

“dude, are you okay?” one of his teammates ask after he gets hits in the head with a soccer ball 

jeno, not even fazed by it one bit, just smiles and gives his teammates a big thumbs up 

“coach, i think there’s something wrong with jeno!” 

anyways, that night he’s extremely excited to text you. 

imagine jeno on his bed, laying on his stomach feet up in the air, taking at least an hour to construct a response that doesn’t make him seem lame or a fifty-year-old man like all of his friends say he texts like 

jeno is probably the type of person that texts, with all the correct capitalization and actual punction plus awkward spacing and usage of emojis 

this time he tried to be chill about it

jeno: hey, it’s me, jeno. sorry for bothering you this late at night, but i don’t understand this problem. can you help me pls? 

sent. 

now jeno was currently awaiting your response….however, you don’t reply right away like jeno for some reason expects

he takes the waiting time to scroll through his social media and it’s the usual things he sees every day 

he sees the juniors’ chenle and his weird little friend talking about some sort of prank they’re going to pull, jaemin’s spam post on how he was stuck making prom decorations to fulfill his community service requirements, etc 

however, a sudden post from @/luccasss caught his attention

especially the girl sitting on top of an old blue car with the senior, middle fingers up  

his eyes glance at the caption quickly 

me and my main bitch fucking it up (pc to our little kiddo) 

wait a minute. 

jeno could remember you saying how you didn’t bother making friends w anyone, so what are you doing with the lucas wong? 

now lucas wong doesn’t have that great of a reputation around campus, especially since he was a held back his senior year. he blows off class and jeno has heard that he’s in cahoots with the stoners on campus too 

your account is tagged in the picture and luckily it’s on public, so jeno could secretly and shamefully stalk your page

while looking through your photos, jeno realizes that he really doesn’t know anything about…. you 

tbh he didn’t even know your name until he saw your bio and username. (facepalm @ jeno)

scrolling through your photos, he saw you posing with other boys and girls that he didn’t recognize making him assume that they were your friends from your old school 

his fingers land on a picture where you’re kissing a cheek of ridiculously good looking guy. checking the tag, he sees that it’s a guy whose username was something along the lines of cb_97

imma miss my ddy chan <3!! owo 

as he scrolling through the chan guy’s instagram, jeno becomes more dejected bc maybe he was too deep in his imagination that he got from watching too many dramas with ara 

letting out a sad sigh, jeno clicks his phone off and settles into bed. the more he thinks about it the more he feels insignificant to you which he was. 

for all he knows, he’s just a random kid in the library that you helped with a few math problems 

the next day, jeno walks into school with no pep in his step :( 

and as his certified besties, jaemin and renjun drag him into an empty classroom during lunch prying him to confess what’s got him down in the dumps 

and jeno knows he can’t hide anything from his besties so he just lets it all out 

jaemin, taking a long blink after his bff’s rant to process the newly acquired tea  “wow, bro. you got the feels” 

“exactly,” jeno groans “i only talked to her once! she doesn’t even know me!” 

“she knows you suck at math,” renjun points out 

and jeno threatens to throw a chair at his friend, but jaemin quickly stops him 

“okay, how about you just take it slow? like get to know her and let her get to know you. it could be that you’re just overthinking her kindness for helping you when you were desperate. appreciation is different from admiration” ngl jaemin was kinda-sorta right 

“btw, who is this chick anyway? you haven’t told us who it was” renjun asked, sitting on one of the empty desks  

“y/n, she transferred a couple months ago from miroh” 

renjun abruptly jumps to his feet, “the y/n l/n? the new math teacher’ daughter?” 

“you know her?” jeno quirks an eyebrow 

“dude she’s in my ap calculus class and she has the highest grade, but she never shows up to class,” renjun tells him. “she’s a straight, badass genius” 

jeno feels stupider as renjun continues to list all of your achievements and the art boy makes it seem like all of them were done effortlessly. 

how stupid was he in your eyes when he couldn’t solve regular senior math problems while you were out here solving college-based ones?

now you seem like a person farther and father away from him.

jaemin, his good-ol-buddy knows that jeno is over-analyzing the new information renjun was telling him, and he tries his best to hype is buddy up

“c’mon, you might not be a genius at math but you certainly are on any field, pool, and court. have some confidence!” 

deep down jeno knows that he should listen to his friend and that he should just be more confident in himself, but he can’t shake his feeling of insecurity and doubt 

so the next time he sees you laying on the empty table in the non-fiction section sleeping, he’s a bit more reluctant to approach you. instead, he quietly sits in the seat next to you as he pulls out his practice sheets to work and miserably fail on

except you don’t wake up for a looong time until jeno accidentally sneezes too loud, causing you to awaken

opening your eyes, you see the boy look at you with wide eyes as if he’s done something terribly wrong by waking you up 

“why do you look like i’m about to kill you or something?” you giggled watching as the boy in front of you became very flustered “why didn’t you wake me up when you came here?”

“oh, you look like you were in deep sleep, so i didn’t want to wake you up” 

you stretched your arms out, one hand over your mouth as you let out an inaudible yawn, “don’t worry about it. i’m always sleeping” 

you blamed all of your fatigue on lucas as it was his fault that you were tired out of your mind from the little night adventure he roped both you and a junior named eun (y/n from childhood-friend!chenle’s au) into. 

honestly, if it weren’t for lucas’s annoying ass laugh waking you up from your nap that one day, you probably wouldn’t have befriended the big bumbling bafoon. 

“yeah, but apparently i’m failing the twelfth-grade again bc i’m not allowed to just go to homeroom and p.e. i mean, who wants to learn about FUNCTIONS when you could just be looking up memes in the library?!?” - lucas wong, 2019

despite lucas’s overwhelming personality, you were quite thankful to have him as he reminded you of your old friends back at miroh, it was nice. 

eun was a soft-spoken child that often had to turn to you or lucas (which wasn’t always a good idea) for advice that you both were happy to give to the underclassmen. 

personally, you didn’t care that you only had like two friends, quality over quantity right? 

“earth to jeno?” you waved your hand in front of his face as he stayed unresponsive 

he mumbles something inaudible and points at a problem 

your eyes gloss over it taking in the problem, before quickly grabbing a pen and solving it. you spoke slowly as you explained the step-by-step solution that jeno had to do. 

when you look back at jeno to make sure that he was understanding the content, you noticed how the jock is off in his own universe and not paying attention to you. 

“please don’t make me repeat that again,” you sigh, catching jeno’s attention. you capped the pen and lightly tossed it on the table, proceeding to stretch out your hands above your head. 

“sorry” 

“what’s up with you?” you asked, wondering why the boy who seemed desperate for your help yesterday, was now acting like he could care less. “and don’t give me that stupid, generic “nothing” bullshit.” 

“sorry, football was tough last night,” jeno said quietly, focusing on the problem. 

despite not being involved in the school festivities, you knew that it was well past football season. and that meant that jeno was lying to you. 

there was a slight pang of disappointment, but you pushed it aside. what were you expecting anyway? he probably only saw you as a tutor. 

you weren’t even his friend for fuck’s sake 

“let’s move onto the next problem” you say, quickly changing the subject. 

honestly, the two of you were fucking idiots. smh 

despite there being awkward tension between the two of you, you’re tutoring was actually very very helpful for jeno. he could actually understand what was going on in math class now. 

remember that test he had to take to ensure that he could play for his soccer match? jeno passed that with flying colors thanks to your careful explanations 

even after that test, the two of you kept your tutoring arrangement;;;and maybe jeno was falling even harder for you. 

he couldn’t help it though! the way you run your fingers through your hair or the way you puff out your cheeks when you’re trying to think of a way to explain something to jeno just makes leaves him star-struck. and every time he gets a problem right without your help, the proud smile that you give him makes his heart leap

it wasn’t like you were safe from the love bug either!! 

lee jeno was hard not to like and he was even harder to not fall for. 

the little cute noises that he makes when he’s lost, the way his eyes go wide when he finally understands the problem, and the eye-smile he gives you when he gets a problem right. 

your heart literally went uwu when jeno offered you his hoodie bc the two of you were sitting underneath the ac vent and you were shivering.

when you tried to give it back to him, he just shook his head and said “keep it, just in case you get cold” 

lee jeno was not healthy for your heart. uwu hours 24/7 

but the two of you were stuck in this weird relationship bc the two of you weren’t exactly friends, but also not strictly tutoring. you would share laughs here and there, but then quickly it would dial down and returned back to the math problems

some times when he was texting you, he would send a cute gif to show you that he understood and sometimes you would tell him about something funny/stupid lucas+eun or your other friends did. 

“just ask him out,” lucas tells you bluntly as the both of you chilled on the bleachers during lunch. 

“hard pass” 

“fine, then i’ll do it.” lucas shrugs, eliciting a hard smack from you 

“don’t embarrass me, you asstwat” 

“who said i was asking him out for you? that boy is a fine piece of meat” 

“istg, lucas, i’ll actually gouge your eyes out” you deadpanned. 

but big ol’ oaf lucas doesn't see you as an actual threat. and he reaches out to grab your cheeks causing your face to form into a fish pout 

“can you even reach me?” he teases, shaking around your face

and this the part where you’re pulling lucas into a headlock, oblivious to the fact that jeno was watching your toughy actions from afar

he kicked the soccer ball angrily into the goal causing jaemin to duck with a small shriek to avoid getting his head decapitated by jeno’s fastball 

“dude wtf!” jaemin shouts 

“sorry,” jeno mutters. 

jaemin looks over to where jeno was staring at and saw you and lucas being really handsy with each other. from that distance that the two boys were looking it, it didn’t look like the roughhousing the two of you were actually doing

you pulling his hair to them looked like you were playing around with it  

jaemin’s buddy jeno be looking like a kicked puppy rn, muttering under his breath about his shortcommings

jaemin is bout ready to slap him upside down the head for having no confidence or whateves

“can you stop talking shit about my bestfriend now?” jaemin @ jeno but the boy is on a whole ass rant on why he sucks in comparison to lucas

“of course she doesn’t like me. she has a whole lucas wong and he’s 6′0 ft of handsomeness. he’s fun and exciting, i’m staler than a moldy piece of bread!” 

can jeno just love himself??????? is that to much to ask? 

“i’ll just never be good enough for her. i’m not her type, she can do better than me.” 

cue jaemin intense internal screaming 

one day, jeno was going to your usual sitting spot in the library when he sees lucas chilling with eun—a girl that he’s seen around with his friend chenle. they were both laughing at something on lucas’s phone. 

jeno looks at the sight confused. cause like aren’t you and lucas a thing? like why was this boy looking really chummy with this underclassmen? 

so jeno clears his throat to catch their attention and both of them look at him like “who tf are you?”

“where’s y/n? she’s suppose to be tutoring me” jeno says 

a look of recognition flashes across lucas’s and eun’s at the sound of y/ns name. the younger female whispers something to the senior causing him to clap his hands. 

“oh so you’re, jeno??” lucas says in this voice

and jeno awkwardly nods

“yeah, y/n is skipping school today so she told me to tell you to look over the notes she wrote out for you” lucas pulled out a notebook and handed it to jeno

jeno flips through it carefully, examining the words you wrote in your familiar handwriting; there was also a highlight code system and little side comments to help him

“thanks” jeno about to leave but lucas’s next comments stop him

“you’re lucky that y/n likes you enough to do that for you. she wouldn’t even tell me whats 4x4 when i asked her” lucas slumped into his seat

“that because she thinks you have chronic stupidity” the underclassmen said, giggling

“aren’t you suppose to be on my side you little pipsqueak” lucas says jokily, rubbing her head. 

and jeno is watching the exchange, getting more and more confused

did y/n know that lucas was hanging out w another girl without you?

“did you need something else, jeno?”  eun asked him

jeno is about to say no, but different words left his mouth

“aren’t you dating y/n, lucas?”

there was a silence that lasted for a good minute, both lucas and the underclassmen giving jeno a blank stare….

until lucas bust out into ugly laughter, bent over his seat delirious and eun was also laughing along but not to the same degree.

was it really that funny? jeno be staying confused

it wasn’t until the librarian came to shush the two did they stop laughing

lucas wiped away tears of laughter from his eyes “that was a good one!”

“what do you mean?” jeno asked

“pffft eun would rather date a rabid animal than me,” lucas said “she’s only friends w me bc i forced her to be”

oh! that was news to jeno

“besides, lucas isn't y/n’s type” eun revealed, shocking jeno

oh really now? 

“yeah, you fit her type really well,” lucas stated nonchalantly. 

eun is like BRUH WHY WOULD YOU REVEAL THAT but doesn’t say anything and kicks lucas underneath the table. she could already picture the pure anger once her friend found out that lucas spilled her secret crush that easily. 

robot jeno is just standing there holding the notebook and deep in thought. 

“is he okay?” lucas whispers, looking up and down at jeno. eun shrugs in response 

bOOM jeno zoom zooms away and the two high schoolers shrug at the jocks before returning to looking at dank memes 

jeno basically charges down to the only female he’s friends with for advice, ara. (go read my fucqboi! jaemin for the backstory!) 

conveniently, he finds both his jaemin and ara standing at her locker talking. tbh it looked more like jaemin trying to flirt with ara and her ignoring him. 

but right now his friend’s girl problems were the least of jeno’s concerns! 

so jeno basically hulk yanks jaemin away from ara and has the most serious expression on his face “i need your help, ara” 

“huh?” 

and he drags ara off to a more secluded place to explain his current situation to, ignoring jaemin’s whines

“to be honest with you, i think you need to have more confidence. now that you know that she isn't interested in lucas, why don’t you just take the initiative to confess?” ara says once jeno explained to her every juicy detail of his hopeless love story. 

“because i don’t think that she likes me. there’s nothing special about me. the only things i’m good at are sports and that’s not very interesting!” jeno exclaims “she probably thinks i’m an actual idiot!” 

“jeno, listen, i’m only going to say this once, but please please understand that you’re a very special person, okay? you’re extremely hard-working, nice, and honestly very fun to be around. it would take a fool to not like you, lee jeno.” ara sighed, patting her friend’s shoulder “just shoot your shot. if it doesn’t make it in, it’s okay.” 

but jeno doesn’t like leaving things to chance. he wants to be sure and he hates uncertainty. 

“when you’re competing or playing against someone, you have no idea how the whole game is going to pan out. all you know to do is to try your best and go all out to ensure the very best result so that you can win. liking someone is like that, you just have to go forward and hopefully, you’ll be able to score a home run or a touchdown.”  

that was sum deep shit 

after listening carefully to ara’s words, jeno came to a conclusion

maybe 

just maybe

jeno will take a chance.  

reaching into his pocket, he pulls out his phone and sends a text. 

jeno: can you meet me at neo ice cream later? i have something important to tell you. 

y/n: yeah ofc. i’ll see you at 4 

he had soccer practice today and for the very first time, jeno was skipping practice, his favorite time. the only time where he’s ever fully confident in his abilities, where his stupid insecurities can’t get to him. 

this was more important the temporary self-gratification that jeno gets when he’s able to fly through practice with ease

lee jeno was taking a leap, unsure of where he’ll fall. 

today, he’ll shoot his shot. and hopefully, you’ll catch. 

[little-murmaider]

I'd like to hear your S&T hair cutting thoughts in stay alive! I did it myself recently, going from butt to chin-length, and it felt weird! Not just physically (pushing nonexistent hair out of the way), but I'd always been the Girl With Long Hair, so it was also an identity thing. I chose it myself and it still felt vaguely bad, and if it had been forced I'd have been devastated. I'm a woman, so different societal expectations etc, but I'd like to hear your thoughts about their identity issues.

Thank you so much for asking, anon! I was The Girl With Long Hair in high school and hacked it all off before going to college cause I was attending art school and I thought having shoulder-length hair made me “arty” or whatever.

  Stay Alive opens with Toki and Skwisgaar losing everything: Their status as billionaire rock stars, their sense of security, their friends. They are being hunted by some unknown malevolent force and don’t know who they can trust. They need to keep a low profile if they want to survive. That means (literally) severing the last recognizable connection to their former lives--their hair.  Toki and Skwisgaar have worn their hair long for the better part of a decade. Skwisgaar might have had it long for closer to two decades! The only times we’ve seen them with short hair is during traumatic moments in their childhoods (+Doomstar for Toki but being a homeless teen is pretty traumatic so count it). Now as they’re trying to survive the apocalypse and weather this fresh trauma, they’re constantly confronted with the past trauma they thought they’d long since escaped. When they look in the mirror, they don’t see the adults who rebuilt themselves from the terrible circumstances of their childhoods: They see the children who are still trapped by those circumstances. It’s a mindfuck. And it’s actually much harder for Skwisgaar to reconcile with that. There’s a lot of stuff I thought of after finishing that I would have liked to incorporate into the story. Like, Toki avoids mirrors until his beard fully grows out because it’s too painful to see his reflection, while Skwisgaar obsessively stares at himself every chance he gets. Toki initially reads this as vanity but really Skwisgaar is experiencing severe depersonalization and is desperate to recognize the person staring back at him.  An interesting and underexplored part of Skwisgaar’s character is this idea that he sees himself as only as good as what he’s able to give other people. His entire sense of identity and self-worth is tied up in his ability to play guitar, and now that’s gone. He’s a world-renowned sex god, but his ability to satisfy a partner is gone. Even his ability to be a good son is gone, because his mother is dead, and he’s a son to no one.  All his means of performing goodness are gone. So what’s left? He’s able to push off this identity crisis by throwing everything into keeping Toki alive--another way to perform goodness. But when Toki prods him into talking about the time he spent in Swedish foster care--a horribly traumatic time when he, guess what, also had short hair--he comes completely undone. I’ve said this before, but one of my regrets is not building up to Skwisgaar’s breakdown more. The story is from Toki’s perspective, so of course he sees Skwisgaar as this hyper-competent, unassailable, perfect force of nature. But I wish I’d shown the cracks in that facade.