#also I melodically I love how that line sounds to end the bridge

[wavesoutbeingtossed]

I feel like we as a fandom don’t talk enough about “one single thread of gold tied me to you” 🙃

[girlreviews]

Review #434: Crooked Rain, Crooked Rain, Pavement

I always considered Pavement to be the cool (well?) older brother to The Breeders. Same vibe, same energy. I stand by that. I resisted listening to Pavement very deeply and embracing them for a long time based solely on who it always was pushing them on me: terrible men. I didn’t even realize this until I gave this record a listen all the way through and realized I now associated Pavement with a really good dude friend who shares my love of music, treats me like a sister and tells anyone who will listen that I’m the best kind of friend. I once described his style as “90s goofball” that was half the Seattle grunge-scene and half young Adam Sandler. I stand by that too. He loved it. Anyway, I’d forgotten the original associations and resistance to begin with. I like that your brain can do that: forget, and remember to forget to remember.

Some notes. Silence Kid, to me, sounds like Buddy Holly’s Everyday melodically. I can’t help but hear it and expect it to go a particular direction. Of course it doesn’t, because it’s Pavement and their songs have moments of being twinkly and melodic but ultimately insist on descending into discordant chaos. Their lyrics run more like slam poetry than traditional songs with verses, bridges, and choruses. All the same. When I hear Silence Kid, I hear Buddy Holly and I’ll always wonder if it’s on purpose.

Cut Your Hair is probably the one Pavement song that you do know if you know any, it was their only real bonafide “hit”. It’s got some very radio friendly twangy guitar and oooh-oooh-oooh-oooh-oooh-ooooooohs in it. I have never minded the song but certainly never thought it was anything particularly special. It does have a fun little break in the middle where it all gets a bit silly on the guitar. Honestly for me the best part is the opening line:

“Darlin’ don’t you go and cut your hair

Do you think it’s gonna make him change?”

I’m not sure there are any women out there that haven’t had their hair commandeered by the patriarchy in some way, whether systemically by societal expectations or whether on an individualized, sinister, controlling level within a relationship. That’s not what the song is even about, but it’s a perfectly posed question. I actually realize I have tons of stories about ways that women’s hair has been weaponized in abusive relationships or just how it factors into male aggression generally. Some are my stories and some aren’t mine to share, but I’m too exhausted to get into it anyway. Cut your hair if you want. Grow it long. Dye it purple. Shave your head. Do whatever the fuck you want. Do it because you want to and because you like it. Who gives a shit what the men in the world think of your hair. And no, they won’t change. Also, your hair looks fucking great.

In my listens of Crooked Rain, Crooked Rain I remembered a couple of things. One, it’s really very good. Two, I love a shitty vocalist. Why is that? I don’t know, but there’s really something about a dude that can’t sing all that well but tries anyway. Unfair is one of my favorites. I don’t really spend a lot of time trying to figure out the meaning behind lyrics in Pavement songs, but I get the sense that he’s not a huge fan of whoever it was written about. It does end with him shrieking “trash, trash, trash”, so you know. I suppose it’s possible he is singing about literal garbage but I wouldn’t bet twenty bucks on it.

Gold Soundz is a good example of how Pavement and maybe Stephen Malkmus specifically have this way of making songs that sound like they should be “nice” or “pretty” (in the context of 90s grunge), but if you really listen he’s never all that nice and anything complimentary is always kind of backhanded:

“So drunk in the August sun

And you’re the kinda girl I like

Because you’re empty, and I’m empty

And you can never quarantine the past”

I bet she sure feels special, gee whiz! Feels about as good as when a love interest of mine described me as a “lost, broken, little girl” as if it was some kind of compliment. I’m only one of those things, and it is little. Same guy made me miss almost all of Pavement’s set at a festival a few years ago in favor of seeing literally no one else instead. Trash, trash, trash. I did get to see Spit on a Stranger so that was a consolation.

Fillmore Drive is pretty spectacular. It’s a big old noise that’s trying to be quiet. Most of it is about being tired and needing to sleep. The rest of it I really couldn’t tell you, I genuinely do mean it when I feel exasperated and exhausted trying to decipher their lyrics. I think this is why Pavement stir up such challenging feelings for me in general. I like the music, I like the sounds, I like the songs, I think they’re pretty great. But they also feel like a really brazen depiction of what it’s like to be in a relationship with a particular kind of guy — the tortured artist. They’ll never love you as much as they love their own suffering, and so you too will suffer. Tortured artists don’t just torture themselves you know.

I like his shitty voice and I like their big noise. You know whose I like better? Kim Deal and The Breeders. I yield my time.

[realcrocodiletears]

music i love - five seconds flat (2022)

This album just does something to me that I can’t describe. The way I have developed an emotional, personal attachment to this record is something uncanny for myself. Being familiar with Lizzy McAlpine from her rise to fame on TikTok, and her song “Apple Pie” graciously shown to me by my girlfriend, five seconds flat was a new, breath-taking experience. It builds upon her prodigal composition skills and superb songwriting, while also expanding on her mellow, acoustic, melancholic sound. One we were previously familiar with on her debut record. There is something about five seconds flat that allows it to be melodic and soothing at times, or angry and grungy, or cheery and buoyant. The record is as versatile as it is consistent; Lizzy shows she isn’t afraid of taking risks or going outside of her bubble.

There is a story being told as the track list progresses, and by the pre-concluding track, “chemtrails”, it’s put into its entire perspective. Speaking about the closer, chemtrails, first is important because it symbolizes a type of loss yet to be explored on a the record: death. "chemtrails" is about Lizzy maneuvering life without her late-father, consistent with the theme of the album. Longing and loss are at the heart of the album; it being marketed with theme of skulls, ghosts, and the end of everything. Love is the prevalent theme on five seconds flat; loss of a partner, tragic death of love, the pursuit of love. “all my ghosts” captures this pursuit beautifully, painting an accurate picture of the honeymoon phase, the trauma of heartbreak, and the recklessness that can come with love. There is a lyric that I just love on the 8th track, “ceilings”. The lyric is “and it feels like the start of a movie I’ve seen before”, and it tells us how Lizzy has been here before when falling and love, knowing well how things may end, causing her to hold back from it.  “ceilings” also being the most notable track on the album that projected Lizzy into the mainstream.

Production on five seconds flat also expands on her soft sounding acoustics from her debut record without sacrificing her signature tone, harmonic vocal stacks, or acoustic presence. I absolutely love the way the strings introduce the second chorus of “called you again”, or the funky synth line that takes over the bridge of “erase me”. The mixes are done perfectly to compliment and contrast the grungier moments on “firearm”, or the soothing vocals on “hate to be lame”. Lizzy’s voice manages to compliment the calmer moments with the highs of her range, or fill the mix during punchier chorus lines with the lows. Philip Etherington Ehren Ebbage is credited for the production of this record and he did an outstanding job at transcending the indie, soft-spoken, melodic sound we were used to, to one that improves and expands to a fuller more dynamic tracklist.

As a piece of art, five seconds flat works so well, showcasing lyrically and sonically the highest highs, the lowest lows, and everything in between. It builds personal connections with the listener, giving you a place to cry, scream, shout or whatever. It’s also worth mentioning there is also a whole short film that goes with the tracks on the album. How cool is that? Easily one of my all-time favourites, and my favourite release of 2022. I mean it when I say I would do anything to listen to five seconds flat for the first time again. 

9/10

~ will

[parkers-gal]

fluffy hair

wc: 1.2k (fluff)

tom x ag!reader - tom joins the reader in her interview

"Y/N! It's been awhile!" Zach greeted you through the screen, and you laughed, nodding your head. 

"I miss you guys there, in the studio. How is everything?"

"Good, good. Everything's chill here. What about you? Album release and all that?"

You giggled again, shrugging. "It was fun, low key, and safe."

"Good, glad to hear that. Should we start?"

"Let's, yes." 

"Great. I am so obsessed with this record; we're just gonna go down the line for each song." 

"Got it, sounds like a plan." You laughed, looking behind camera, and Zach took note of it before continuing. 

"Shut up."

"Excuse me?" you laughed at him, and he went wide eyed. 

"Oh! No, no, no, I meant the track, the intro-"

"OH," you laughed again, face palming yourself. "Duh, obviously. Continue."

"Right. It's very... melodic, with what, the strings and everything. And your voice cuts in and just tells all those haters to shut up and- what was the meaning behind that?"

You laughed, looking off camera to Tom for a split second before answering. "Well, I mean. With everything happening, it's hard not to tell people to just like," you put your hands up, palms outward in a stop position. "to just- shut the fuck up, y'know? We're fighting for our lives, all these white, straight old... men."

Zach laughed, nodding, and the conversation continued until you switched subjects to the next song. 

"Thirty-four plus thirty-five," he state with a grin. "Now what's that about." 

You laughed loudly, shaking your head at Tom while he told you a joke. 

"Is someone back there?" Zach cut in with a laugh. "They can join if you'd like."

You looked to Tom before shrugging sheepishly, and he rolled his eyes before plopping next to you on the beanbag. 

"This is Tom, the inspiration."

"Y/N!"

You laughed, looking to the camera. "I'm joking, joking," you kissed his forehead, ruffling his hair. "He's my lovely little boyfriend."

"Mhm," he hummed in satisfaction. 

You went on to answer the question, "Well, when Peter sent some string samples over, I heard this one and it was so pure and sweet and completely.. Disney, if you will. And I was sitting with Scotty and Tom and I was like 'what's the dirtiest thing we can write with this?' and well, we got thirty-four thirty-five."

Zach laughed, "So it's not based on real life?"

You laughed before Michael, the other interviewer, cut in with a comment. 

"I actually didn't know it was about sixty-nine until the outro," he laughed, and so did you. 

"Ah- good, that's good actually. Enjoy it without being told how you're supposed to interpret it."

"Did Tom contribute anything to the song? Let's- let's go in depth with the lyrics and how you came up with them."

You laughed again before answering. "Well, I was working on the first verse with Scotty and I was like 'what the fuck can we put here?' and he- he jokingly said 'gimme them babies' and I was like 'holy shit that's perfect. That's going in. We're not changing that.'" You looked to Tom, whose arm was around your waist. "Tommy came in not long after that and wrote the pre-chorus. He was so intent on putting the 'I been drinking coffee,' part. It ended up being my favorite out of the song. He was in the studio with me when we recorded that, basically telling me how to sing it. It was hilarious and scary how bossy and smart he was about producing a song."

Tom rolled his eyes, kissing your temple. 

"Is that true, Tom?"

Tom blushed as he answered. "Yeah. She had just gotten new string samples and she was super excited about and I just- I wanted to be there, make memories. Especially since, at the time, I wasn't working." 

"Tom what's your favorite track?" 

"I think," he thought for a moment. "Well I like all of them, but I like 'my hair' a lot."

"Also inspired by him," You cut in cheekily, and he eyed you with a playful glare. 

"Did you contribute on a lot of tracks?"

"Oh for sure," Tom nodded. "It was quite an experience; doing music instead of acting. It's so strange to me, but it was amazing fun."

"Which track did you do the most work on."

You laughed, and Tom rolled his eyes. 

"Probably 'nasty.'"

"Oh?"

"Yeah, I was there when she was recording vocals, and I just kept telling her to do it again."

"That's actually," you interrupted with a laugh. "that's actually where that intro line is from. 'This bitch really gon' make me,'" you quoted. "because he kept making me doing it again and again and it was hilarious."

"I want to talk about.. six-thirty."

"Okay," you nodded with a smile. "Good track."

"What does it mean? Like the title?"

"Well on a clock," you were motioning with your hands. "The hands are pointing down at six-thirty."

Both of the interviewers oh'ed loudly, laughing at how they hadn't figured it out. 

"The bridge in there, I love it so much."

"Thank you, thank you."

"Do you think you've found that person you can play video games with at two A.M.?"

You glanced to Tom with a gentle smile, eyes softening too. "Yeah," you looked to the camera. "For sure, I think I have."

To was giddy at your response, subtly pulling you closer into his side and kissing your temple again. 

"Now let's talk about the positions music video."

"Oh this should be fun," Tom commented, and you laughed at him. 

"I'm sure everyone else interpreted the title much differently than you did." 

You laughed, nodding. "Probably."

"How'd you come up with the concept?"

"Oh, obviously the real world. We need people like that in office- like, imagine if that were the Cabinet of the White House? Women and gays and trans and everyone. I think we're in desperate need of a reboot."

Zach laughed, agreeing. "A reboot of the Cabinet. I like it, and you're absolutely right," he looked to the monitor. "At the end there, you were giving a medal to a postal worker."

"Yeah," you clasped your hands together in excitement. "I think the US postal service has definitely taken a huge hit this year. They've suffered a great deal; I think including that in my video was almost essential. They need to be recognized and acknowledged."

"But also like the step stool," Tom cut in with a laugh. "She was too short for the postal worker and they were like 'we don't have higher heels,' so I brought that out."

"You twat," you laughed, grabbing his nose lightly like in a child's game. 

He huffed, laughing, pulling you closer and kissing the tip of your nose in response. 

"Can we talk about my hair before we end this lovely interview?" Zach asked once the two of you settled down. 

"By all means."

"We'll get to those whistles in a moment, but the whole song is so.. intimate. Have you found someone like that? To- to appreciate your hair in all forms and designs?"

You looked at Tom again, and he blushed, already knowing your answer. 

"Yeah, yeah I have. My boyfriend just loves my hair, all styles and colors. It's nice, because I feel like the world doesn't really... see my true hair? But Tommy loves it dearly. It's a special place in my heart for that kind of love." 

Tom smiled, head tilting and eyes crinkling, and you ruffled his chocolate curls. 

"Also though, I really love his hair. Fluffy."

[blueofthesun]

incoming long post of slightly better articulated (yet still waffly) phalaris main album thoughts before i log off and go to bed

schadenfreude is musically quite reminiscent of tiw and/or twom at times, and while not my personal favourite, i think the opener spot is the best place for it. i see it as leading us into the new album while also tying into the previous era. it does still feature the kinds of synth elements that punctuate this album, and those parts in the song (i.e the intro and the bit at approximately 3:30 with the twinkly guitar and the low synth backing kyo’s vocals) are the parts i like the most.

i don’t understand the title choice for the perfume of sins but the song is a right banger and i wish it had been a single instead of ochita. but i guess that’s what you get when you start putting out singles as early as they did for this album. the symphonic bits are amazing. i also finally watched the mv and i love the execution (pun intended...)

at least initially i feel much more drawn to the second half of the album, which i think sounds fantastic and refreshing after the tiw era. songs like utsutsu, bouga wo kurau (which, yes, is technically still first half but closer to the halfway point), mouai ni shosu and otogi remind me a lot of arche and listening to those for the first time i could clearly see why so many arche songs were suddenly thrown into the live set rotation for the new tour lol. i hope they bring out these new songs for live shows soon too.

ochita is the weakest song on the album by far for me. especially with the way they muffled the guitar bridge/breakdown in the album version (i still think that can't have been intentional. but who knows. i don't trust their mixing engineers), but also composition-wise. i can feel quite fond of ochita when in the right mindset because after all this pandemic hell the song already feels nostalgic to me, but on this album, not so much.

hibiki is beautiful and one of the songs that made me get choked up hearing it the first time. the vocal lines on the more melodic tracks really stand out to me on this album and this song is one of the ones where the melody really carries the song.

i expect eddie to grow on me hard. so far i like it fine, but i think it will be a fantastic live song.

otogi really stands out to me as a complete piece, definitely a gem and one of my instant favourites (and not just because it could be an arche song). the instrumentation is so dreamy and the composition is nice and dynamic. the chorus is gorgeous with the harmonies in the background and the powerful low drums. the rhythm section interlude is very cool too. i also feel like this is the best place to mention that i will never not be in awe of kyo’s versatility as a vocalist. this is one of those dir songs that make me go I LOVE THIS BAND SO MUCH AHHH.

when i say i sobbed for the entire nine minutes of listening to kamuy for the first time i am not exaggerating. i was so surprised by the direction this song took since i had not expected it to stay so mellow the whole way through. with dir, you begin to expect a big breakdown or a dramatic switch up in a long song like this, but this one stayed dreamy and melancholic and slightly trippy, keeping the tension in the subtlest most beautiful way possible until the very end, sort of pulling the rug from underneath my feet but in the best way imaginable. also i’m very emotional about the double acoustic guitar. kaoru on acoustic!!!!! we love to see it.

all in all, i like this album a lot more than tiw right off the bat. i promise i will stop with the arche comparisons but the way i felt about the last two tracks in particular vividly reminds me of the way i felt listening to arche for the first time, how awestruck i was. i’m very pleased rn and excited to listen to this album more and discover more about the songs!

[toraashi]

ahem. i present to you: zuzu's song rec list.

trivia love - bts (i had a whole character arc through this song, okay.)

the kids aren't alright - fall out boy (idk why this song brings me so much peace but it does)

chicken wings - samm henshaw (i got a thing for horns, i guess? fuckin' love samm's music though, please do explore his discography!)

freezing - bren joy (MEWWWWZIKKKK, DO YOU HEAR ME)

死ぬのがいいわ - fuiji kaze (smth about this one.. yeah)

heaven is a place in my head - bad suns (so much serotonin, not enough time)

cemetery - coin (these songs in this album remind me of the modern!xiao i conjured in my head.. ugh <3)

okay i'll stop, i'm annoying enough as is 🧍🏽

- zuzu('s love language is music, sorry)

ZUZU okay okay don't even apologize you could never be annoying and i love sharing music like this and i just ascend when people send me music recs so lemme take some time to go through these

it’s kinda long so like... hopefully i wasn’t the one being annoying this time 😭 i love music so much too so i just kinda went all in

1.    okay i love this song so much. i heard it when it came out but it's probably my favorite of the "trivia" solos the rap line did in that era 😭. the piano has a death grip on my heart it's just so romantic and so like happy ugh i will be throwing myself at namjoon's feet

2.    i was obsessed with fall out boy and this entire album when i was 15, but this song has just been so timeless to me especially as an adult now. I love the pre-chorus and the bridge so fucking much especially the line "i just wanna sit around and gaze at my shoes, and let your dirty sadness fill me up just like a balloon," patrick stump just goes in on that line and it just ends me everytime

3.    okay first impression i love the fullness of the singer's voice and the dynamics in the song! like you can hear tires skidding and then that break between the verse and chorus with the dialogue -- it just has so much character and is so easy to listen to like i have a whole image in my mind about the setting and the colors- ugh this is def going into one of my (89) playlists

4.    okay so i haven't heard this song before, but i am listening to it now, and i am obsessed with the vocals + the lyrics. the extended metaphor with the water is just *chef's kiss*. it's so peppy but in such a catchy way! i love the piano from the beginning hiding in the background of the song too. thank you for giving me a gem to listen to on the way to work!

5.    I’m absolutely seeing a theme with the piano base with r&b vibes and i’m loving it so much and i’m loving that i can see what type of music you’ve been listening to lately through these songs. My favorite part after the beat is just the vocal inflections like it’s just so intricate and melodic i love it! there’s also this one repeating part where it just like starts low and goes up (i don’t know enough about singing to tell you exactly which part 😭) but it’s sooo addictive!

6.    i only know a few songs by bad suns (my fav is maybe we’re meant to be alone), but i’ve always loved the like super high energy peppy rock/pop mix. it’s hard to describe but the vocals are very reminiscent of 80s rock and i love that trend in 10s alternative music. This songs gives me just an image of driving down a super flat road in the summer just like sun on your skin, breeze in your hair like just laughing and happiness. but overall i love it and the concept makes me want to write about wonderfully bittersweet things LMAO

7.    okay so i listened to this a few times and i’m obsessed with the bridge i love the melody of it. i don’t know a ton of coin songs, but the ones i do know would literally be so cute with modern!xiao (who i’m obsessed with like xiao actually being able to be happy just 🥺🥺 i want to squish him and make him laugh) but anyway i really enjoyed how this song sounded a little more minimalistic compared to the other coin songs i’ve heard and i liked the concept of the song. existentialism in music is just always so good lmaoo

ANYWAY i hope that wasn’t too much 😭💕 i loved your music but my favorite from the ones i hadn’t heard was probably the chicken wings one! i usually listen to music that’s a little more chill/easy listening and i just liked how dynamic and individualistic that song felt especially with all the spontaneous noises that really created the imagery in my head idk! send more music recs whenever you want i love them 😭💕 

[whitherliliesbloom]

towards a tomorrow

[ ffxivwrite2021 ] ★ [ masterlist ] ★ [ prompt #28 - bow ]

[ illya & kirishimi ] ★ [ 2,062 words ]  ★ [ period drama au ]

for matchi’s period drama au. briefly mentions illyanaud, laurelis and kaye. 

bow-  to bend your head or body forward, especially as a way of showing someone respect or expressing thanks 

kirishimi didn’t care for frilly dresses or etiquette unless it was to make a statement - so she gets lessons from the most ladylike friend she knows

“Gods, shite! How do people breath in this stupid thing?!” 

Amongst the light breeze of the midafternoon wind, the melodic chirping of the songbirds and the sound of water splashing freely from the white marble fountain, Kirishimi’s less than ladylike words pierce through the air as she puffs her chest in with a low grumble and is followed by the soft and gentle bell-like chimes of a younger girl’s giggles a few feet next to her.

“I’m sorry. I don’t think the corset can be loosened any further, I made it as loose as I could for you already.”

“Can I just take it off then?” Kirishimi asks, hopeful even as the shorter lalafellin girl shakes her head calmly with am apologetic frown, her vibrant violent eyes swirling with sympathy.

“I wish you could but... Laurelis designed the dress with your corset in mind.. It just wouldn’t fit if you didn’t-”

“Shite.”

Yet another swear tumbles carelessly out of Kirishimi’s lips, and Illya lets out a soft, barely audible sigh before flashing her taller friend yet another gentle smile.

“How about a short break then? I think you’ll feel a little better if you take a breather.”

“Yes please!”

Without even a seconds’ hesitation, Kirishimi grabs the frame of the hoop skirt beneath her bright orange dress with her hands and marches to the gazebo before slumping down onto the white garden chair and kicking her matching pair of high heels off. She leans down to massage the soles of her feet with a grimace, feeling light indents where the rim of the heels had dug into her feet and wondering if there was going to be blisters forming under her hosiery by the end of the day.

In contrast to the almost unruly way she’d retreated under the shade of the white and purple gazebo, Illya in comparison was the very picture of elegance. With only the tips of her thumb and index finger, the young lady lifts the hem of her frilly lavender dress before climbing the steps up to the gazebo. Despite wearing lacey embroidered heels that seemed like they were even more of a pain to wear than her own, Illya’s balance was perfect, each footstep graceful and deliberate so much that Kirishimi could barely even hear the little tap of her heels against the floor. 

Even the way she sat upon the chair, taking her time to tuck her dress beneath her thighs before sitting herself down and folding her hands neatly upon her lap - it wouldn’t have made Kirishimi felt self-conscious any other time before today. But it was exactly because she was here now, for the exact same reason she’d even agreed to commission an over the top ball gown from Laurelis that she swear to never wear outside of it’s intended use, that she quickly decided to correct her posture. 

The taller woman feels out of place - as she typically does, but especially next to her considerably more demure, ladylike friend. Surrounded by the jewel toned walls of the Skawi mansion, the flawless marble tile paths that circled the garden and practically shined in the sunlight and the bed of delicate spring flowers that filled the air with a light floral fragrance, it would be hard for her not to feel even a tiny bit like a fish out of water.

“Thanks again, Illya. For agreeing to teach me.” Kirishimi opts to speak, breaking the long hanging silence as if in sheepish apology. She knows she isn’t the best student, and so the least she could do was be cooperative and nice to the girl who is graciously lending her her time and efforts. 

“You’re very welcome, Kiri.” With a radiant smile, Illya nods her head, her innocent expression bright and at home with her subtle movements of grace. The birds that sat upon the mansard roofs sing in tandem with the sweetness of Illya’s voice. “I’m honored that you would come to me for lessons about etiquette. Even if it is to...um... break the social construct.”

Mismatched eyes widen in a panic, and the older woman leans forward over the table and raises her voice a tad.

“Hey, I hope you don’t misunderstand me! There’s nothin’ wrong with being prim and proper! I’m not tryin’ to do anythin’ to disrespect you! I just-”

“I know.” Illya speaks, her brilliantly pure white hair fluttering gently in the breeze like a wavy silken veil over her head. “You’re just trying to be you. You have the courage and strength to stand up to people who would try to tell you do otherwise. I like that about you.” With yet another euphonious, soft giggle, Illya raises a hand up to press against her chest. “Besides, you wouldn’t have come to me for a favor if you truly did have malicious intent, would you? The fact that you called Laurelis and I for help means that you trust us.” 

A soft blush rises up to Kiri’s face where speckles of white snow glowed lightly from the heat from her cheeks and the bridge of her nose. Her gloved hand moves up to rub the side of her neck sheepishly, and she cannot help the toothy grin that adorns her face.

“I guess you’re right.” the woman murmurs. “I also... admire you a lot, you know? You’re so sweet, and nice... a bit too nice, honestly. You don’t even get angry when idiots spout lies about you...”

Kirishimi would be lying if she said she didn’t feel an immense amount of admiration for Illya’s ability to stay as calm and collected as she does - even above the seemingly effortless way she’d conduct herself like the society’s perfect definition of a ‘lady’. 

But there wasn’t envy... it wouldn’t be warranted, especially since Kirishimi knew that behind the perfectly immaculate way Illya would hold herself as the young mistress and future heiress of her family name, came a set of troubles and insecurities that she too was struggling with. 

It’s evident by the flicker of melancholy in Illya’s eyes, like a field of delphiniums and hydrangeas that were drooping in the midst of a drizzle of rain and grey storm clouds, even with a forced, stepford smile gracing her delicate and fair features. They were lovely, beautiful even in their imperfect sadness.. but Kiri could not bring herself to feel anything but sorry at the sight of them.

“And I wish I were even half as strong as you. You’re able to stand up for what you want, for who you are... If I had a fraction of the courage that you possessed then perhaps... I could have...” The girl looks down, the silver band that she’d refused to wear hidden deep in the depths of her dress pocket weighing far more heavily than it ever did before. “I could have stopped my uncle from calling for the engagement...”

The Skawi family had well deserved respect from the capital, and with it came a reputation and image they had to uphold. And with their fame, came the inevitable greed from the current head of the family - the man Illya could barely even bring herself to think of as family, the younger brother of the long deceased patriarch, Lachlan Skawi. 

Selling himself and the name of the Skawis wouldn’t be enough for the man - and so he’d sold the dignity of his niece as well by calling for an arranged marriage.. something that Kirishimi knew would not be solved with a few simple social statements and protests. It involved the name of the Skawi family, and worse still, it involved the capital. 

Internally, Kirishimi wonders what Young Master Alphinaud intends to do. Word about mistress Skawi’s engagement to one of the members of the royal bloodlines has spread far and wide by now, and he would undoubtedly be working tirelessly for a way to stop the marriage. 

But if the combined efforts of Laurelis’ family, the Leveilleur household, Hien’s influence as a well respected foreign emissary wasn’t enough to convince Illya’s uncle to call off the engagement, what else could they hope to do?

“You’re stronger than you think you are, Illya.” Kiri reassures, her tone gentler than is usual for her, as is the light, reassuring smile upon her face. “You took the first steps to realize your own dreams, didn’t ya?” 

Kiri gestures to the carnation earring she wore that dangled lightly with gleaming white pearls, and Illya raises a hand up to brush against her ear lightly. The earring was a gift from Master Alphinaud, the man she owes much to... Her mentor, her dearest friend and...

A dust of red rises up to Illya’s cheeks and spreads to the tips of her pointed ears as she nods.

“It’s... It’s thanks to everyone... and especially Master Alphinaud that.. that I finally started to learn medicine. If it weren’t for everyone’s support, I wouldn’t have-...”

Illya holds her tongue, pressing her lips into her fine line as Kiri allows the silence to fester, until she grins at the look of renewed determination upon the young maiden’s face.

No, Kirishimi is right. She certainly may owe much to her friends and loved ones, and she wouldn’t have taken that first steps towards realizing her dream to become a doctor had she not met Alphinaud... but it took great strides of her own too, a strength and new found courage to stand up to the ones who doubted her - one that she felt determined in full to carry on for as long as she needed until her dreams are fulfilled and she can be free from her own social constructs that are weighing her down.

“Once all this is over.. could you teach me how to fence, Kiri?” Illya asks, eliciting a surprised hum from her taller friend. 

“You wanna learn how to fence?” The woman asks... not in dissuation, of course... but in mild disbelief that a girl as sweet and gentle as Illya would be interested in the sport. She’d say yes, of course, regardless of Illya’s reasons. She’d teach Illya whatever she wanted to learn especially since the girl had been kind enough to be teaching her etiquette. But she still cannot help but to be a bit curious.

“I admit I’m not the strongest or physically well built... I’ll probably be a really bad student but-”

With a wave of her hand, Kiri dismisses Illya’s words with a hearty, loud laugh that echoes throughout the garden, warm and bright in the midafternoon sun.

“You’ll be great, I guarantee it. You’re quick on your feet and I think you’re a lot more fit than you give yourself credit for.” If Illya’s ability to function without fault all way in tight corsets and high heels are anything to go by, at least. 

With a bright smile of gratitude, Illya thanks her friend warmly with a bow of her head before standing herself up from the chair, circling around the table and gesturing to the haphazardly abandoned orange heels that laid on their sides next to Kirishimi.

“Let’s continue, Kiri. We still have much to practice for the day!” Illya shrugs her shoulders when Kiri groans, slipping her feet back into her heels before reluctantly standing herself back up. “You remember what I said about the proper way to curtsy is, right?”

To demonstrate, Illya holds the sides of her dress, barely pulling the hem up from the ground and crossing her legs before dipping herself down gracefully like a ballerina... and Kiri could only let out a lazy grumble in protest.

“Can’t we rest for a little while longer? I hate this curtsying shite.”

“The faster we get this part of the lesson done, the faster we can move on to table manners.” Illya’s innocent smile is bright and radiant, belying the little hint of mischief laced under the tone of her knowing voice. “I’ve already asked for the pastries and sweet tea to be prepared, you know? Kaye should be arriving with them any second now.”

“Curtsy? Got it. Left foot behind right???” Mismatched blue and red eyes fly open, and the woman does a full curtsy that elicits yet another light and airy giggle from Illya. 

“It’s the right foot behind your left. Not too quickly, now. Let’s try that again.” 

[angrymoontaeil]

Blades and Quads ~ Liu YangYang

Wc: ~3.6k

Warnings: injury, swearing (like one or two)

Pairing: Yangles

AN: Okay, so like hockey boys are fine af. I also use a lot of Roller Derby terminology so if you want definitions either dm me or I can make another post with the definitions for you all! ALSO!!! Requests are open for both boy and girl groups, and dm if you want to be in the tag list! ❤❤❤

"As of today, we will be sharing the rink with the hockey team," your coach's voice rang throughout the rink, groans and sighs of protest sounded about the team at the announcement, "yes, yes, I know how much you loathe the team. However, they need a place to practice while their rink is being fixed because of their a/c. The team will use our blades and the rink and we will have practice as normal. Now, for today we will work on..."

"So you're telling me, we get to practice while those boys are here?" Your friend, Niki nudged you while leaning in close. Your coach continued to ramble about the practice for today while the two of you whispered in the corner.

"Those boys?" You questioned.

"Yeah, those gods we call the hockey team? I mean, have you seen them?" Niki bounced as she talked and shifted her weight between her skates, obviously excited about the news of the hockey team sharing the team's space for some time.

"Okay! Start some laps then!" Your coach called out and the rest of the team started going around the track lazily, talking and stretching out a bit. You and Niki did the same, catching up with some of your other teammates and chat before the practice started up fully.

"Oh no, oh no, oh no. Look, Y/N, it's them." Niki and the other girls giggled while they all stared at the hoard of boys started to pile into the rink. You stared as well. I mean, they weren't unattractive, they were hockey boys after all. It was just you never particularly liked them. There was really no reason, they just were an itch you were never able to scratch, and it bothered you to no end.

"Hey, Y/N. We are gonna start a scrimmage, do you wanna be on my team?" You turned from the boys and skated backwards to talk to the girls easier. You agreed to team and the group made your way over to where the coach was handing out panties to the designated captains of the two teams. Niki was handed the two panties of your team and you two made it over to the bench where the rest of your team sat talking.

"Alright. So, this is just an easy scrimmage. Just listen to each other and work as a team. Also, if you do not bridge when the pivot says to. I, Niki, will personally make you do laps. Fifteen in three. Do not make me." As much as you loved Niki, her scary side always managed to crack a smile on your face when she threatened the younger kids.

She tossed you the jammer panty and you accepted it with glee. Jamming was your favorite position, it was the release of adrenaline when you have to break through the pack, or when you lapped the other jammer. Maybe it was crowd screaming when you jump the axel, or do a fancy trick that drives them insane. You, and the blockers made your way to the track and you set yourself up behind the jammer line.

"Okay we are keeping it simple today. Hip-checks are allowed, you do not have to slow down to enter the pack either. We do have refs, do keep it legal, people."

You took a deep breath and tugged on your wrist guards and perched on your toe stops.

"FIVE SECONDS!"

Breathe in, and out. In... and out.

Once the whistle blew, you sprinted into the pack doing a mo-hawk in time to go around the inside of the opposing team, and spun back around to sprint through your team. Another short whistle blew signaling that you were the fist to make it through the pack, that the other jammer was stuck by your team's wall.

"Let's go, Y/N!" Niki screamed as you sailed by the bench. You smiled and winked at her before starting crossovers around the turn. This boosted you further as you started them again around the second turn before slowing down a bit with a plow stop before entering the pack once again.

"Yo! Yangles? You with us?" A hand waved in front of the boy. He was focused on you as your strong legs propelled your forward and your shoulder swung with every push. He quickly snapped out of his daze and glared at Lucas who wore a smug grin on his face. "You like what you see?" His cocky smile adorned his features while YangYang rolled his eyes before watching you again. You swiveled away around people as you went through the pack. Your face remained in a smile the whole time, making quick conversations and making quips to the others when you swung your shoulders and swiveled your hips.

Once you broke through the pack, a laugh sprouted through your lips which sounded melodic to YangYang's ears. A huge smile broke out on his face as you lapped around again the track.

"YangYang, let's go!" Sungchan called from the group and waved him over. YangYang looked back in time for you to successfully jump the apex and land perfectly with a shout from you and your teammates. He silently cheered for you before turning to his team and getting ready for practice.

"I have no idea how you can manage to do that," Niki said while she took off her knee pads "I mean, it took me hours just to jump in place without wiping out." You smiled and shook your head, removing your helmet and running your hand over the back of your neck to get rid of the sweat that built up.

"Remind me next practice, we can work on it." She giggled and jumped up from the floor and engulfed you in a tight hug before picking up her bags from the floor and bounding off the track. You finished taking off the rest of your gear in time before you heard shouts and the rolling of wheels on the floor. You didn't bother to look up from your bags to know that the hockey team skated onto the track.

"Hello, Y/N... how are you on this fine evening?" You looked up from your bags and swung them over your shoulders. There stood Haechan and Lucas, both with wide smiles.

"Hello," you dismissed before walking through the two boys and heading towards the exit of the track.

"Y/N!" A huff left your lips but the scowl turned into a bright smile when the voice matched a face in your head. You turned to see Johnny and Doyoung making their way over to you, with a pouting Haechan and a laughing Lucas behind the two. "I saw that jump earlier, that was so cool!" Johnny was the first to reach you and wrapped his arm around you and gave a slight squeeze. Doyoung stopped in front of the two of you and spoke a mile a minute about how the team looked amazing and how your skating abilities improved by a tenfold.

However, although the compliments were rewarding, your focus was on something else. Yangyang skated around the track with ease, quickly stopping and starting up again with a slight swivel of his hips.

"You like what you see?" Johnny quipped, close to your ear. Doyoung stopped talking and looked to where your gaze landed on the lean boy. He whipped his head back to you look and then motioned back to YangYang with a surprised look on his face.

"Him? The captain?" He said, shocked laced in his words.

You rolled your eyes and ducked out from under Johnny's arm. "You have to be kidding me," you said under your breath. The screech of wheels made you stop and look up at the two boys in front of you.

"You have to talk to him now," Doyoung said with his arms crossed over his chest, "I think he likes you as well."

"Who likes who?" Haechan practically shouted from behind you, causing you to turn around quickly and seeing both YangYang and Haechan stood next to each other, latter with a shocked expression, and the other with a slight blush dusting his cheeks. Before any of the boys could continue their current topic, you spun on your heel and exited the track without another word.

The air was cold and bitter to your exposed skin. You threw your gear into the trunk of your car and turned the heat on high when you sat down and locked the doors.

"Like me?" You whispered to yourself, setting your head onto the steering wheel.

Yangyang, the captain of the hockey team - the team you hate - likes you? How? The two of you weren't rivals, nor were you close at all, it was just new information that you never thought was possible. You sighed heavily and pulled out of the parking lot, ready to head straight to bed after you got home.

A scowl formed on your face the moment you stepped into the arena. Voices bounced off the walls of shouts and screams that boiled your blood automatically. Today was one of the days that your team and the hockey team would be skating at the same time, while Niki was was a smiling mess, your face showed the total opposite.

"Cheer up, Y/N! Maybe it won't be that bad," Niki said when the two of you set down your bags and started unpacking your gear. The smile never dropped her features even as she watched some of the boys skate past her with a smile and a wink.

"Bet that it will be," you shot back at her, sliding your elbow pads into place and fastening the velcro snugly. A lot of the other team members were already on the track, some chatted with the hockey players, and others stretched out in separate groups. You watched the swarm of skaters go around smiling and laughing.

"Hey, Y/N!" Chenle, one of your juniors skated over to you with a bright smile. He reached down to you and you gratefully accepted his hand and pulled you up. "How are you? It has been so long!"

After warm ups, both teams split up to work on skills. You were currently watching the younger skaters as they practiced their stops. They giggled at each other when they would fall down and push each other down just to have the other do the same when they got back up again. Out of the corner of your eye, Johnny was making his way over to you. You turned to him and he swung his arm around your shoulders.

"Yangles wants to do a group practice," he said in a low voice. You whipped your head to look at him. A shocked expression adorned your features and Johnny let out a loud laugh. "I mean it. He means it. He wants to do an endurance game to combine the groups." Then it was your time to laugh, tears brimmed your eyes.

"I will just feel bad, I don't want you guys to loose too bad. Poor Haechan won't take it."

"I can't take what?" Speaking of the devil, Haechan appeared to your other side and circled around you and Johnny. "Afraid that I can't take some pussy?"

"I mean we know you can't, but having our teams compete in a game. I can't have you crying on the track now, can we?" You quipped back at the male. He shot a glare at you and dismissed the thought with the wave of his hand.

"You'll be saying that now but just you wait. I am going to have Yangles fuck you." He stopped and smirked, then realized his mistake and started to stutter around waving frantically with wide eyes. "I mean fuck you up, no.. not, not fuck you fuck you. I mean fuck you up like beat you up. No, not that either... I meant he will win against you, not fuck you."

Heat rose to your cheek and you cleared your throat. Johnny tried his best to keep his laughs to a minimum as Haechan continued to blabber on about you not fucking YangYang, and you trying to hide your embarrassment. Quickly, you ducked underneath Johnny's arm and made your way over to where YangYang watched some of his team do skills of hits.

"Hey YangYang," you spoke quietly, the boy turned towards you and immediately his eyes went wide, a small hint of blush sprung up on his cheeks, "I heard you want to play a game with the teams?" He nodded frantically at your words.

"Yeah, I was wondering if you knew one?" His words seemed timid and his eyes never met yours. You smiled at him and motioned him to follow you to the center. When you took a few paces and found that he didn't follow you, you grabbed his hand and met his eyes which widened once again. You tugged the boy into the center and let go of his hand. The warmth left them suddenly and you shivered in the cold, not realizing till now how cold the building was.

You clapped your hands loudly, "Okay, everyone! Gather round, we are planning to play penny tag!" A lot of the kids on your team giggled loudly and shouted their excitements for one of their favorite games. "For those who do not know, these are pennies," Niki skated over to you with a laundry bin full of them. The garments were thin jerseys with faded numbers on them, you were to wear them when scrimmaging for practice to signify teams. "Each person will get one penny. You will skate around trying to grab other's. If you manage to get yours stolen then you must to 10 push-ups and 2 laps before starting again. The one with the most after 20 minutes wins!"

The hockey boys nodded their heads and murmured to themselves about how they were to win, the same with your side. "However!" Your voice rang again, "there will be teams." You turned to Yangyang and gave the flushed boy a smirk. "After the 20 minutes, which ever team has the most will win and make a punishment for the other team."

Both sides seemed to agree and more excited at the news of how the competition would go. You made eye contact with the captain once again and rolled over to his side. You placed a hand on his shoulder and lent in close to his face. The slight flush earlier darkened by many shades at your action and you only chuckled. "Watch your back, captain. It would be a shame if I had to choose a punishment for you," your lowered voice had an obvious affect on YangYang who stood tense with wide eyes when you pulled away to face him. You left him standing there, frozen solid, after a quick wink.

If it was possible, your team had more energy than usual when you passed out the pennies to them. Niki rolled over and talked to you about her 'plan' to seduce the boys and then steal their pennies. However, you watched as YangYang went to every member and handed out the colored pennies to his team. His lean body easily strolled around in his skates as if he was just walking around.

"So, Yangyang?" Niki butted in slyly.

"Never in a million years," you said flatly tearing your eyes away from the boy. You made eye contact with Niki and nodded towards the track where she gracefully stopped and popped out her hips sassily.

"Okay! 20 minutes on the clock, starting now!"

You rolled around peacefully, letting the small kids take a shot of stealing your pennies. By the 15 minute mark, you had already taken out a lot of the hockey team. They obviously were angry by this time apparent by the pout on Haechan's face when he finished his second lap as another person stole his penny.

"Hey..." Lucas stood beside you, keeping an even pace with yours, "can I have one please?" He cupped his hands together and gave you puppy eyes with a pouty lip. You smiled widely and rolled your eyes, suddenly stopping. Lucas stopped and spun around to face you, knees bent and a flame in his eyes, "So, I am not getting one? Fine," He took a step in a lunge before springing after you. A small screech left your lips as you bounded away from the taller.

You were going opposite of the track; when normally you would do crossovers as right over left, you and Lucas were currently gaining speed with left over right crossovers. The giant smile never left your face and a bubbly laugh spilled past your lips. The seconds ticked down the clock as the two of you spun around the track. Just as you picked up your left leg up to do another crossover your skate hit a small object and sent you flying. You threw your hands forwards, relying on the wrist guards to catch your fall. A sharp pain flew up your leg to your hip when you finally hit the ground.

"Shit, Y/N!" Lucas called from behind you. He stopped quickly and fell to your side. He grabbed your arm quickly and you looked up to face him. Concerned was etched in his features as the pain in your ankle increased when you tried to move your lower body to stand up. Lucas was quick to catch you before you fell lower to the ground. "Yangyang!" He called out, the boy was already skating over and landed on the ground by your feet.

"I am going to take your skates off, okay?" His voice was calm but his face said otherwise. He gave a small smile while you shuffled to face him. When he took off your left skate you closed your eyes and waited for him to touch your right leg. When he did, you squeezed your eyes shut and smacked your hand over your mouth to hold a muffled cry. YangYang stopped his motions to look up at your pained expression. "Here," he said suddenly, "let's get off the track." He stood up to move next to your other side and motioned for Lucas to help you up.

Both grabbed your arms and lifted you up to stand on your left foot and lean on YangYang who slowly helped you to the seats by all your equipment. "Stay here," he said before smiling and adding, "I mean, you can't but... you know what I mean." The bright blush from earlier when you flustered him appeared on his cheeks once more before turning around and heading towards his equipment.

You bent down and undid your knee pads and threw your elbow and wrist guards to the side before bending down to remove to try to remove your skate. You undid the bow of your skate before slowly loosening the skate and slipping it off of your foot. You whimpered softly under your breath as you did so. Finally, when the weight of the skate left your ankle, you took a deep sigh of relief.

YangYang stopped in front of you with a box of what seemed to be medical supplies. He sat down by your foot and, with soft touches, propped your foot up on his lap and started to take out some of the supplies from the box.

"Why do you hate the hockey team so much?" The question scared you. You didn't expect to not only be in this predicament but also have the question leave the hockey captain's mouth. You brought your head up to look at YangYang who didn't meet your eyes, instead he focused on your foot. You didn't answer, the words couldn't leave your mouth. You settled for watching the boy start wrapping an ace bandage around your ankle and foot delicately.

"I mean," You stopped for a second, the words were hard to find, "I don't hate..." YangYang looked up from his lap and met your eyes. "I mean I don't hate you, or your members at all, I just... I don't know. You guys always steal the attention away from us. Our team is under funded and not popular enough to get people in, and I just..." The boy finished bandaging your foot and slowly lowered it to the floor. "I just want my team to be happy and have people root for them like they do for you."

YangYang said nothing, his eyes held concern and compassion. He lifted himself from the floor and sat down next to you on the bench. Your hands were engulfed in warmth as he grabbed them and turned you to face him.

"I understand. Having to watch over the team and make sure they are not only happy but work together, it takes a lot." YangYang lifted his hand up and went to reach for your face. He stopped himself and you glanced at his hand, and then his red face. You gave a small nod of your head and when his hand rested on your cheek and brushed over your cheek bone you swear your face was on fire.

"But, I promise that next time I will be the one to root and cheer for you. I will even loose my voice if I have to," His words brought a smile to your face and you nodded with his had still on your cheek. You brought your hands to wrap around his waist and settled your head on his shoulder. YangYang tensed at the action, his hands hovering over your back and a shocked expression plastered on his face.

"AYO! Lovebirds! Stop hugging! I still want to beat the hockey team!!!"

~~~~~

Taglist: 

@t-toodumbtocare​

[mattbflatt-loves-starset]

STARSET and The Right Way to Start an Album

Have you ever listened to a newly released album by your favorite artist, and right after hearing the first song, you can’t help but think “Hot damn, this is gonna be amazing”? That’s because the first song in an album is incredibly significant to drawing an audience in and establishing the tone of what’s to come. If you do it the right way, people will keep listening, vehemently searching for more. Cinematic rock band STARSET has this alluring motion down to a science, while also deviating from the norm ever so slightly. Each of their albums starts with a small, prologue-type song, followed by a track that purely and unequivocally kicks ass. If you don’t feel even the slightest shift in emotion after hearing the start of a STARSET album, then to quote one of my favorite childhood youtubers: “Brush yourself off man, because you are dead.” -videogamedunky Super Mario Odyssey (dunkview), 2017.

In chronological order of release, the very beginning of STARSET’s saga begins with their album Transmissions, and both the prologue track “First Light” and their first full track “Down With The Fallen” released with the album back in 2014. The prologue has a very intense electronic track, with harsh percussion, spoken lines distorted by a radio filter, and a small string orchestra infused with a drum kit forcing the intensity to grow over time. As the texture of the music thickens, our narrator enters and begins talking to the listener, as if they’re revealing a plan. My personal favorite line from this sequence is “Once you had the power to affect monumental change, would you let fear consume? Or would you overcome?” 

STARSET – First Light Lyrics 

First Light 

The prologue ends with a segue straight into “Down With The Fallen”, in which the listener hears only the pulse of a heartbeat monitor and the first melodic idea of the first full track. Within only a minute and 24 seconds, the dark and pervading sinister tone is set, the album begins, and you realize the most striking thing about this group’s music… they’re telling a story.

Starset - Down With the Fallen (audio) 

Following the timeline, the next album to release is Vessels, which came out in early 2017. The first two tracks of this album are the prologue “The Order” and the song “Satellite”, which follow the same formula as Transmissions, but with a much different execution. There are no words in the prologue at all, and no words are needed. In fact, there is only one musical idea that is developed throughout the entire thing. It begins with what sounds like a solo cello, playing a descending minor third. This is repeated over and over again, and the texture thickens in a haunting manner. Muffled radios play in the background, more strings come in which introduce harmonizing parts, the electronic ambience grows, and the volume continues to crescendo into this horror film-esque high string tremolo, which then suddenly drops the listener into “Satellite”. 

The Order 

The first full track of this album has a much different tone than the prologue, moving into a much more up-beat love-themed rock song. It sounds incredible, and the creative decision here is very smart. The music of this album hides the subliminal themes within lyrics and background lore, a nice contrast to how on-the-nose Transmissions is.

Starset - Satellite (Official Audio) 

And finally, their most recent album, DIVISIONS, went back to the blunt storytelling of Transmissions, executed in a way that shows how much they’ve grown as a group. The prologue “A Brief History of the Future” hits hard with machinery, an officer of sorts yelling inaudible things, and then eventually, a narrator. This narrator is much different than the narrators that have said things on previous albums, as his voice is very clear, and his message is jarring. He tells of what society has crumbled into, and how he seeks “to know the truth” of what the real world is and how technology has controlled mankind (trying not to spoil anything here haha). There’s less of a build up during this prologue, and more of a progression, with a story that hooks the listener instantly. It’s clear that the focus of this prologue is the narrative STARSET has been developing over the years, and given how this album pans out, this is both appropriate and a very smart creative decision.

STARSET – A BRIEF HISTORY OF THE FUTURE 

STARSET - A BRIEF HISTORY OF THE FUTURE (Official Audio) 

The first full track DIVISIONS is “MANIFEST”, which is one of the dopest names ever for a rock song. What’s unique about this album is that there is no segue between the prologue and the first track, which is unlike the first two albums. The prologue in this album is much more conclusive, and gives a statement that allows the first track to stand on its own. “MANIFEST”, being one of the most popular tracks on DIVISIONS, goes VERY HARD, with some of the coolest guitar and high string parts I’ve ever heard in a rock song. Lead singer Dustin Bates’s voice shines well on this song, especially during the section right before the final chorus of the song, called the bridge. This section is the crowning jewel of this song, as Dustin’s high full voice singing combined with the INSANE kit part of STARSET drummer Adam Gilbert makes for such an angry, but passion-fueled part of the song. I have isolated this section and listened to it repeatedly many more times than I can count, it is THAT GOOD.

STARSET - MANIFEST (Official Music Video) 

STARSET is one of the best rock bands that are writing and touring today, and the way they start their albums is unlike any other band I’ve ever listened to. The future of this band is bright, and as an avid fan, I cannot WAIT to see what the future holds.

-Mattbflatt

UPDATE: STARSET’s newest album HORIZONS has just been teased! The album was revealed last night and their newest singles “THE BREACH” and “INFECTED” are now available! Take a listen!

STARSET - THE BREACH (Official Music Video) 

STARSET - INFECTED 

STARSET’s Youtube Channel: starsetonline 

Sources/Links (In Order Used):

https://genius.com/Starset-first-light-lyrics 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VW3Zn4c9pVY 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tW_FkaXeSwc 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MlE1srK-Pp0 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mCbdQNGBw9E 

https://genius.com/Starset-a-brief-history-of-the-future-lyrics 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZXng1JE9dmk 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T-sjOGAQQzA 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cWkbUMQ4-88 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pggN6f4h4So 

[tickle-bugs]

Wrestling With Love

Summary: Tahani catches Jason and Eleanor wrestling for the last Hot Pocket and has no idea how to react. Eleanor picks up on her out-of-character awkwardness and decides to help in her own way.

Anon: I love you’re writing! It’s exactly the lightheartedness we need right now! If you’re up for it, could you do one for The Good Place where Eleanor tries to get Tahani to loosen up and let her know that she doesn’t always have to be prim and proper if she doesn’t want to? Growing up in a less than affectionate family, the concept of horseplay and tickling is very foreign to Tahani, and Eleanor is happy to show her that she can be both and elegant lady and a giggling mess whenever she wants

Eleanor skidded into the kitchen, her cactus-print socks slipping frantically across the hardwood. She’d heard the ultimate transgression taking place in her own home, an unfathomable crime that only one man would have the audacity to commit.

“Mendoza.”

“Hi, Eleanor!” Jason waved.

“Unhand the Hot Pocket.” Eleanor pointed an accusatory finger and strode forward. Jason continued to tear open the package. 

“What? Why?”

“Because it’s mine!” 

“But it’s in the kitchen?”

“Exactly. My kitchen. Which means it’s mine.”

“But I don’t see your name on it. Aren’t you supposed to write your name on it?” Jason turned it over in his hands, earnestly searching for Eleanor’s name. She knew he was being genuine, in his sweet, dumb, way, but that was so obviously a challenge. 

“Last chance!” Eleanor made a show of stretching and bouncing around. 

“No.”

“...no?” Eleanor stopped.

“I found it, so it’s mine. Florida rules.” He nodded, as if the rule made sense.

“We’re not in Florida.”

“We’re not?” Jason’s eyes widened and he clutched the Hot Pocket in fear. 

“I—okay. Last last chance. Hand over the Hot Pocket or I’ll be forced to unleash my wrath.” The threat came out more like an elongated sigh as Eleanor pinched the bridge of her nose.

“Let’s wrestle for it! That’s how I used to settle things with Pillboi!”

“Alright, but I have to warn you, I will probably kill you.” Eleanor assumed a vaguely karate-like pose, but it looked more like she had a leg cramp she couldn’t shake off. 

“You may try,” Jason beamed.

“3, 2-”

Eleanor took off, launching herself at Jason with a war cry. He toppled over with an armful of angry, writhing blonde. He maneuvered her beneath him, sprawling over her like a weird throw blanket, and she could feel the air slowly being pushed out of her. A classic move, but no match for an Arizona dirtbag. Eleanor employed her personal favorite technique: poke until the person quits.

She jabbed Jason in the arms and shoulders, delighting in the little grunts of pain he made. One of her pokes caught his ribs and he squeaked, slapping her hand away.

“Oh?” Eleanor smirked, poking him again. A giggle slipped past his lips before he could stop it. 

“Tickling is cheating!” Jason whined, rolling off of her and trying to protect his torso. She followed him, and when a pinch to his side made him laugh outright, she lit up.

“I don’t think so, bud. It’s not my fault you’re ticklish.” She wormed her hands past his arms and wriggled her fingers into his stomach. Jason fell into giggles, kicking his legs, but still held tight to the Hot Pocket. 

That was alright. He’d give it to her eventually. 

“Eleanor!”

“Yes? I’m listening.” She buried her hands under his arms and he squealed, trying to shove her away with one hand. He held the Hot Pocket as far out of her reach as possible, but his arm was shaking, and it was only a matter of time before he handed her the prize. 

“What are you two doing?” Tahani poked her head around the corner before coming to hover in the doorway. 

“I’m absolutely destroying Jason in a tickle fight.” Eleanor grinned down at him, just a smidge drunk with power. 

“Why?” 

“Because I want the last Hot Pocket.” Eleanor furrowed her brow. 

“Couldn’t you talk things out? Reach a diplomatic agreement for both parties?” Tahani flinched when Jason squealed again. Eleanor’s fingers searched for a surrender under his arms, and it was only a matter of time until he gave in. Was the Hot Pocket easily accessible with the way Jason had curled up? Yes, but it was about the moral victory. 

Chidi would be proud. Probably. 

“Tahani, babe, there is no peaceful way to decide who gets the last Hot Pocket. It always ends in blood—or in Jason’s case, laughter.” Eleanor wiggled her fingers in the air over him, giving him another chance to willingly surrender, but he flipped the two of them over and grabbed hold of Eleanor’s knee. 

“Hey! Tahani, hehelp!” 

“Jason, cut it out. Release her at once.” Tahani assumed her ‘stern voice’ and straightened her posture. Jason didn’t even blink in her direction. 

“What’s the magic word?” Jason sang, pinching at Eleanor’s knee like there was no tomorrow. 

“Please?”  Tahani tried. 

“Nope! It’s hot wings.” Jason beamed.

“That’s...two words. It also isn’t much of a password if you just tell me the answer.” Tahani raised an eyebrow. Jason hooked his fingers behind Eleanor’s knee and she kicked, muffling her frantic laughter in her hands. 

“Okay, try and guess the new password.” 

“Is it—Is it hot wings, again?” Tahani chuckled.

“Yep!”

“I’m dying!” Eleanor wheezed, pushing her heels along the floor to scoot away. Hot Pocket forgotten, Jason pulled her back and tickled her stomach, laughing along with her. Jason wiggled his fingers in the air before darting down to squeeze her sides, and growls permeated her next set of giggles at the role-reversal. 

“Do you wanna help?” Jason gently pulled Tahani’s hand until she kneeled next to Eleanor.

“N-No! No helping!” Eleanor pointed a shaky finger at the two of them. Jason rolled his eyes and affixed his hands to her ribs, giggling at the way she would try to curl up. Tahani experimentally ran her nails over Eleanor’s knee and she yelped.

Oh?

Tahani scooted over, brow furrowed in concentration, and hiked Eleanor’s leg into her lap. Her fingers skimmed curiously over the denim, dancing in various swirls and lines to pull the sweetest music from Eleanor. It felt like learning guitar after learning to play piano--you knew all the sounds, but your fingers would trip when met with strings, rather than keys. 

She knew what tickling was, of course, but to enact it? Her only reference points were films and Jason’s guidance. With the way Eleanor was cackling, though, it seemed like she was doing a decent job. 

“Counterattack!” Eleanor squeaked, reaching up to quickly tickle Tahani’s stomach. Tahani made a tiny noise of surprise and flinched away, hands flying to cover her face. When the attack didn’t persist, she slowly peeked through the gaps in her fingers to find Jason and Eleanor staring, wide-eyed. 

“Why are you looking at me like that?” She silently cursed the obvious waver in her voice, but the way her friends were watching her was downright terrifying. She immediately got the sense that no stern voice would get her out of whatever she just stumbled into. 

“My dear, sweet, giraffe. Have you been holding out on me?” Eleanor scooted close with an objectively evil grin. 

“Sorry?”

“You will be.” Eleanor pulled Tahani close, scribbling experimentally at her stomach. Tahani peeped--quite literally peeped--and wrinkled her nose with a smile. 

“For the record, you’re infuriatingly adorable,” Eleanor grinned, wriggling her fingers into Tahani’s sides. She yelped and fell into loud, melodic laughter, eyes wide as if startled by her own volume. Air fled her lungs far faster than she could replenish it, and she snorted around her next batch of giggles. 

“Do that again.” Eleanor’s hands stilled. 

“Absolutely not.”

“Please?” Eleanor looked at her so earnestly that Tahani’s breath caught in her throat. If Kamilah--or worse, her parents--had heard her make a noise like that, she’d be the laughingstock of every event for months afterward. But Eleanor didn’t have the sneer that her family usually wore, only an amused smile and soft, genuine eyes. 

“Even if I wanted to, I can’t just...do it on command.” Tahani averted her eyes, cheeks pink, but she could still feel Eleanor’s piercing gaze on the side of her face. 

“Oh, I can help with that.” Eleanor started up again, much more gentle than she was with Jason, and with each twitch of her fingers she asked an unspoken question. Each pause between scribbles and waves of pokes inquired if Tahani wanted to stop, but...she didn’t. Eleanor’s playful attitude was so contagious that it inspired Tahani to not self-destruct when she snorted again and again, like a giggly, broken record. 

“I wish you’d laugh like this more often,” Eleanor sighed, pained, but she didn’t relent--she just kept giving Tahani little windows to flee. She just gripped Eleanor’s wrists and laughed with reckless abandon. 

“I really shouldn’t--Eleanor!” 

“Why not?”

“I-It isn’t--” Tahani’s voice got stuck on her laughter before her barely-coherent sentence had the chance to leave her mouth. Every time she tried to speak, more giggles and titters floated out of her in place of words. 

“I have no idea what you were gonna say, but the fact that you couldn’t finish means it didn’t matter. Besides, there’s no need for, like, a presidential speech. Normal people laugh, Tahani.”

“I’m not normal!” That wasn’t all that she’d intended to say, but all her coherent thoughts were fighting and losing against another round of snort-filled laughter. 

“Are you kidding? The only thing not normal about you is how cute your laugh is! You sound like a princess! Ignoring how angry that makes me, you are as normal as anyone else.” Eleanor squeezed her sides and Tahani squealed, then groaned. Eleanor couldn’t help but laugh with her. 

“Noooo,” Tahani whined, hiding her face in her hands. 

“Yes. I bet even the Queen of England has snorted once. You can be all snooty-” she dragged out the ‘o’ while poking Tahani’s stomach- “and have fun.”

“I promise that there’s nothing unladylike about making your friends laugh. It’s the only skill on my resume, which makes me a professional, which also means that you have to listen to me.” Eleanor tugged Tahani’s hands away from her face and brushed her hair away from her eyes. 

“Repeat after me. I, Tahani Al-Jamil…” Eleanor raised her right hand. Tahani just watched her with a silly smile until Eleanor rolled her eyes and raised Tahani’s hand for her. 

“I, Tahani Al-Jamil….”

“....have the world’s cutest laugh.” Eleanor beamed. 

“I am not saying that.” Tahani tried to cover her bashfulness with an indignant huff, but the grin on her face undermined her attempts. 

“Well, it’ll be a lot harder to say laughing, but I respect your desire for a challenge.” Eleanor nestled her fingers just behind Tahani’s ears, taking her by surprise. Before she could even hope to fortify her composure, she crumpled into Eleanor’s arms. High-pitched, screamy giggles erupted from her poorly covered face as she tried to turtle her way to safety. 

“Alright, my laugh is c-cute! Cut it out already!” She swatted in the general vicinity of Eleanor’s hands but she missed every time. Eleanor slowed down, smoothing and tucking Tahani’s hair with light fingers just to hear a few more whispers of laughter.

The crinkle of a wrapper shattered the mirth-charged air, and two pairs of eyes turned to watch Jason dispose of the Hot Pocket packaging. The empty Hot Pocket packaging, to be exact. 

“I was hungry.” Jason shrugged, completely oblivious to the murderous look in Eleanor’s eyes. Tahani could feel the simmering rage emanating from her, and if it wasn’t for the familiar way that Eleanor’s fingers were twitching, Tahani would have feared for Jason’s life.

She still did, but it was less likely that Eleanor would have the patience to kill him with laughter versus, well, a stranglehold. 

“Tahani--”

“On it.” Tahani helped Eleanor to her feet. Jason’s eyes widened and he bolted, already giggling, with his friends hot on his heels.

[feverinfeveroutfic]

chapter twenty four: sextape

Ruben's new house overlooked the Bay waters, about a block away from the harbor and within range of Alex's parents' neighborhood. If nothing, Sam could walk in between both of their houses. Her father kept his promise and made up a bed for her in that spare room; the dream catcher was back at her mother's house but she knew that she could sleep well knowing that Alex and his parents weren't too far from there. She lay down on the bed that first time around with her feet up against the wall opposite her and she envisioned Alex right next to her.

It felt so strange given she had reached the middle of her twenties and yet she found herself back home with her parents once more. New York felt like a whole other strange world once again, even with her couch still back there.

“I want my couch,” she muttered under her breath at one point. “I miss my couch.”

Then again, she felt like a teenager again, as if she was given another chance at it. There was a boy who lived down the street from her whom she had traded saliva with before and she was trading in between living with her mother and her father, and yet she still had a place to go with her old friends back home in New York. The sole difference was she had reached twenty four rather than fourteen.

She stayed with Ruben for about a week and then she made the trip down to Catalina on the bus and stayed with Esmé for about another few days before she made yet another trip up to the Bay Area. She knew that she would have to settle on some place at some point given the sheer extent of traveling and her feeling as though that things could be better once again: the bus rides through the Central Valley were rather tedious as well and she wondered how in the world Alex made that seven hour car ride so entertaining for himself the day he picked her up from the side of the road.

At some point, right before her next stay on Catalina and there was a longer stop than usual before the end of the line in San Pedro, she spotted a little art shop near the Santa Monica pier and she stepped off of there before the usual one. She knew she would miss the ride back and thus she ran along the sidewalk to that shop up the block. She held onto the top of that fedora Alex had given her with one hand and the courier bag he and his parents had made for her with the other hand. She was about to walk right into an art shop with the Skolnick name right at her back.

Her old journal had been falling apart at the seams for a time at that point, more so than when she and Alex were up at Glenbrook together. She only had one sheet of paper left anyway: she also took his advice and broke down on some page protectors.

A brand new journal, a new set of pencils, and a new chapter of life all for a small price.

She had to run back to the bus stop but she missed it regardless of anything, however. She knew in her heart that her leaving the bus was more than worth it. She stood there under the protective awning with her new tools tucked away in her courier bag and the fedora high upon the crown of her head, and her sunglasses rested upon the bridge of her nose.

Within time, the next bus came and she finished the trip down to San Pedro and she caught the next boat over to Catalina Island.

She had reached there about half an hour later than she had intended with her mother, but she explained it with a mere showing of her courier bag to Esmé.

Sam stayed there at the house for a full night and then the next day, for most of the morning, she had the house to herself. There was only thing she could do, since Alex hadn't given her his number. She dialed that old familiar number once more and she brought the cordless up to her ear.

“Hello?”

That familiar upstate accent.

“Joey?”

“Oh, hi,” he greeted her with a crackling on his end. “I was just thinking about you.”

“Were you now?”

“I was thinking about—how beautiful you are.”

“You're funny, Joey,” she told him as she twirled a lock of hair around her finger.

“But it's true, though,” he said with a clearing of his throat. “I was thinking about how beautiful you really are. Where are you right now?”

“Catalina. My mom's over in Avalon right now, so I have the whole house to myself at the moment.”

“God, I miss that island. It was so cool there.”

“It really is! I love it here. But you know—I love New York, too.”

“I wish you were here, too...” His voice trailed off.

“Are you drunk?” she asked him.

“No? Why would I be?”

“Because you were that one night when Chuck, Alex, Marla, and I were at your place.”

“I wasn't, though,” he pointed out. “I was more starving than I was drunk off my ass.”

“You smelled like booze, too.”

“Sure, I may have had a drink or two over the course of that day. But I wasn't drunk, though. I was lucid—I'm sure you remember me.”

“Yes, I do. How could I forget, really.”

“Sam, I wasn't drunk. I promise you that I was not drunk.”

“What was in that needle, by the way?”

“The needle I used to inject myself with?”

“Yeah, what was in there?”

There was a prolonged pause, such that Sam moved her head forward and her eyes darted about the floor in front of her.

“Joey? Are you there?”

“Yeah.”

“What was in the syringe, Joey?”

“Black—tar—heroin.”

She raised her eyebrows at that.

“Heroin,” she echoed in a soft voice.

“Black tar. It's extra raw so you get a heftier high from it—I guess it makes you sick, too. I didn't tell you—when we were in Europe—you know, when you, Marla, Belinda, and Aurora were with us—Frankie and I did a little bump of cocaine. I gave it up because it made my nose itch like crazy—he might still be doing it as far as I know, but I did it because it was there. But I tried out black tar because it's hefty in its numbing abilities.”

“Why would you want to numb yourself, though?” she asked him, concerned.

“Because I was in a lot of pain then, Sam. You weren't around to comfort me. I had to comfort myself somehow.”

“Charlie told me that they just wanted you to have a break, though, Joey,” she pointed out. “They just wanted a break, too.”

“Is that all?”

“Yeah. Which means—someone's not telling me the whole truth. I don't know if there was a lack of communication or you had something in mind.”

“I guess I just misheard him,” Joey confessed with a sigh.

“I think you did. That's—why I asked you if you were drunk.”

“I think I was just—in the moment then when he called me at the time.”

“In the moment of what?”

Another pause, albeit one that was even longer as a result of that.

“Joey?” she called out to him. “Joey, are you there?”

He cleared his throat, but he didn't say anything further. Just a soft buzzing noise on his end.

“Joey?”

“Picture me there next to you,” he started in a husky voice, “I've got my pants unbuttoned. I'm coaxing you to come on closer to me.”

She froze right in place. “I'm picturing,” she told him in a low voice.

“Come on closer to me,” he begged her, “come on closer and put your hands down the front of my jeans and touch me there. Touch me there, and I'll return the favor to you.”

“Where?” she asked him.

“Keep your voice down.”

“Where?” she asked him again, that time in a near whisper; Esmé was still out of the house and she was in her room, but she had to do it for him.

“Right below the equator. Right inside that lovely bit of sugar you got there. Just give ya a li'l fingerin'.”

“And what if I don't touch you?”

“You use your mouth on me. Use your mouth and then get on top of me.”

“I ride on top?”

“Yes. Right—on top.”

She thought about the tape that she and Chuck had recorded to send out to Bill. She wondered if he had it with him at that point and the whole entire thought of it made her heart hammer inside of her chest from that point onward.

“Should I top it off with a kiss to you after that?” she asked him as she ran her tongue along her top row of teeth.

“Please,” he insisted, still in a low husky voice. “And then I want you to climb the other way around with me.”

“So you can—”

“Put my tongue inside of you, yeah.”

“Oh, my, Joey—what if I wanted to squeeze your ass, like a couple of ripe oranges?”

“What if you wanted to squeeze my ass?”

“How would you like that?”

“I'd like that very much. I'd probably squeeze yours, too—”

There was a click on his end; she also heard the front door close right behind her.

“Hang on, I'm getting another call,” he told her.

“My mom's home, too.”

“Oh, shit! Yeah, you don't wanna get caught talking like this in front of her. I'll talk to you later, though.”

“Joey?”

“Yeah?”

“I love you,” she said.

“I love you, too. I'm glad my own sour stomach was weak enough to keep me from injecting that horrible, horrible shit, otherwise I never would've heard your voice again.”

She smiled at that, and then the two of them hung up at the same time.

His words stayed with her the whole week she was on Catalina, and even more so when she took the bus ride back up the Valley to the Bay Area. The first thing she did was visit the studio to see how Testament was doing, especially with her father being a part of their team now.

Sam pushed open the front door, which hung slightly ajar, so she could hear Alex plucking his guitar and Chuck laughing at something. Even from outside, she was growing familiar with his guitar tone and the elaborate, melodic way in which he played. She rounded the corner to find him there at the sound board, with that red guitar rested upon his lap and with his hair brushed to where it was rather frizzy and fuzzy and stood every which way.

“Hey, you,” she greeted him.

“Hey!” he greeted back to her, complete with a lopsided little smile. Her gaze wandered over to the sound board, where she spotted a series of tapes there, all which had the words “signed and sealed” inscribed on one side.

“Are you guys done?” she asked him, stunned.

“Yeah, it's all been recorded,” he told her, “well, Greg and Louie's parts are, anyway. Eric and I have to put down the guitar work, and then Chuck has to lay down vocals and then it all goes into mixing and mastering.”

“Don't you guys also have to play the songs together, too?” she asked him.

“Yeah, we do! We do that—in about a month or so, or whenever our residency is up anyways. It's like the last thing we do is perform the songs live in studio.”

She looked about the room around them: no one else in there with them, even with the door to the pool room wide open.

“I keep thinking about our encounter in the pool room,” she said to him in a low voice.

“You know, I don't really have a memory of it,” he confessed. “I mean, I sorta do? But it's rather vague, though. All I remember is feeling you up against my body and the next thing I knew, I woke up and I had that strange hickey on my neck. I never had one of those before, but when I took a better look at it, I thought 'is that what I think it is?' Sure enough it was. Again, my memory is real hazy but I do have somewhat of it, though.”

“And we made a pinky promise to one another that we wouldn't speak about it to anyone, either,” she added.

“I do remember that,” he told her with a raise of his eyebrows. “I remember that pretty clearly.”

“Because you puked it all up.”

“I puked it all up but I was still kind of fuzzy in the head, though. But I do remember that part, though. I remember feeling your finger on me, too.”

“I should tell you that you are quite the kisser,” she told him.

“I think you are, too,” he said with a little squint to his eyes. “I can still taste you. Even after all the water I drank up after the fact, I can still taste you on my tongue.”

“Do you remember what else I told you?” she asked him in a soft voice.

“Something about—me being perfect or something along those line?”

“How I want to protect you from things, especially other women.”

“Women are not things, though, Samantha,” he said in a singsong voice and with a wag of his finger. “You ought to know that. You're a woman yourself.”

“Of course,” she retoreted as she rolled her eyes. “But what I mean is I want to protect you, Alex. I think it might be from you being younger than me.”

“Could be. Or it could be the fact that you're out here in California again and your boyfriend is back in New York still.”

“You were a bit drunk, though,” she pointed out.

“I was drunk and feeling every inch of you all over me, like it's some kinda hallucinogen.”

“I kind of wanna tape your mouth shut now,” she admitted.

“Why?” he chuckled at that.

“Tape over your mouth and give you what for below the equator.”

He raised his eyebrows at that, but she realized that he was looking past her. Sam turned around and there was no one behind her.

“I thought I saw Eric back there,” he said as she turned back around and faced him straight on. “Anyways, you wanna tape me up and give me a little something down south?”

“Yes!”

“Lemme ask you this, Samantha—where did all this come from?”

“Hanging out with you and Chuck and Eric and Greg and Louie. That's what.”

“Nah, I'm sure you were feeling like this with Joey and all those guys back East.”

She eyed the veins in his lanky arms: they seemed much more slender, sinewy, and toned than before, as if he had worked out this whole entire time. She brought her gaze up to his face and those deep eyes that she had seen from a whole mile away from the coast line.

“I'll tell you this, though, Alex,” she told him, “—you are nice and soft. For a strong little guy, you sure have the softest body. Like cuddling with a little teddy bear. Or a little pillow.”

“Hey, I ain't little,” he scoffed with a toss of his black hair and a wag of his finger. “If you and I ever get together at some point again in the future—and things get extra passionate between us—I'll show you what I mean.”

She froze for a second, and then she realized what he was talking about. And then she showed him her tongue.

“You are a dirty little boy, aren't you,” she teased him.

“Again—I ain't little. And I might have to wash anyways—I'll be right back.”

He stood up and slung his guitar off of his shoulder, and then he walked on out of there, and into the next room. Given he said that within junction of itself, she wondered if he was actually going to do just that. She turned to the tapes on the sound board, those completed tapes, already recorded and ready to be pieced together for the new album.

A familiar woman's voice caught her ear right then, and she turned for a look to the door of the pool room. She recognized that jet black hair, which had been cut extra short and flipped about at the back of her head. She had put on a bit of weight from carrying two babies, but her protruding belly told Sam that there was something else now.

“Hey! Aurora!” She was stern.

“Sam!” Aurora's face lit up but Sam's arms folded across her chest took that look of joy away as quickly as it came. Eric and Alex stopped right in their tracks in the doorways right there on either side of them: the room fell silent as a result.

They hadn't spoken since that fateful New Year's Eve, but the wounds were still raw with Sam. Aurora glanced back at Eric, who stood there in the doorway of the pool room; he looked as though he was about to head back in there but he never did. She returned to Sam with a serious look on her face.

“Listen—I feel terrible,” she confessed. “I feel so terrible for what I did, for leaving you and the girls behind. But—I have a family now. It's hard for me to focus sometimes—and it was especially then, too. My brain just—wasn't firing on all cylinders. Really, I feel terrible, Sam. I can't believe I did that to you.”

“I see you already have another bun in the oven,” Sam grumbled; she swore that Aurora just had twins that past summer.

“I do, yes. I'm sure you know—I love my daughters. I love Emile. But I also love you, though. I love you and I miss you. And like I said, I feel terrible.” She paused for a moment. “If you're going to blame anyone, blame me.”

Sam parted her lips to say something but no sound came out. Instead, Aurora lowered her gaze and she turned away. Sam's mind went blank and then she turned to Eric and Alex there in the doorways, and the both of them looked so small at the sight before them. Eric then stepped out of the way to let Marla through: her hair still in that neon green, but she carried a small bundle in her arms.

“Our daughters,” Aurora explained, “Phoebe and Elizabeth—I just brought Phoebe with me. Emile's caring for Elizabeth back home right now. I don't know what this baby'll be next but I'm eager to meet him or her.”

She turned to Marla.

“What were you gonna do?”

“I was just take her outside to the porch,” Marla replied as she nodded to the doorway around Alex. “It's kind of stuffy in here and smells like beer.” Alex himself grimaced at that; he stepped out of her way and Aurora followed suit.

Sam, Alex, and Eric congregated there in the middle of the floor; she then turned to Eric.

“I feel like I haven't seen you in a million years,” she told him. “How are you?”

“I'm good, thank you!”

“We're on a roll lately,” Alex said with a glimmer in his eye.

“Hell yeah, we are, my brother.” Eric bumped his fist, and then Alex returned to the sound board for his guitar; Sam peered out the doorway at the sight of Marla and Aurora taking their seats on the porch. There was a small shrub right there at the rim, one decorated with big hot pink flowers. Sam had seen those flowers all over California, especially all over the southern region of the state.

“I don't like those flowers,” she told Eric in a low voice.

“What, those pink ones?”

“Yeah.”

“Why's that?”

“Those are oleanders. They're poison, Eric.”

“Oh, shit.”

“Yeah, look how close they are to them, too.”

Eric cleared his throat.

“Marla,” he called out. “Marla—”

“Just a second,” she told him off, and she adjusted the bundle in her arms, and then she returned to Aurora. “Anyways—”

“Marla!” Eric insisted.

“Just a second, Eric!” she insisted, and she turned back to Aurora. “What was I saying?”

“MARLA!”

She rotated in the chair and fully faced him with Aurora's daughter cradled in her arms.

“What do you want, Eric?” she demanded.

“Get away from that bush!” Sam declared.

“What, this bush right here?” Marla gestured to the hot pink flowers right behind her.

“Yes, those are oleanders—they're poison,” she advised her.

“Oh, shit—” Marla yanked Phoebe away from there.

“Yeah, go wash—” Sam proclaimed, and she and Eric looked at one another, horrified. Marla hurried off of the porch and headed back inside of the short corridor before them and into the bathroom. Aurora lifted up her chair and inched away from there.

“That was close,” Eric said as he headed back to the pool room.

“For real!” Sam returned to Alex, who had taken his seat there once again and played around with the volume on his guitar. He raised his head and showed her a soft expression.

“I feel like if you go back to New York now,” Alex told her in a low voice, “you'll be seen as a hick.”

“Why's that?”

“Because you're in touch with nature,” he said with a shrug of his shoulders, “I dunno, just something about being in a place like New York and knowing about things like oleanders.”

“That's probably why I loved upstate so much,” she recalled in a soft tone.

“There's also—this is just from what I've seen traveling through there and from touring—like a bluntness with New York, too. You like things that are nice and soft. It's okay, though—my dad tells me that time makes you stronger as it passes along.”

“I'll buy that,” she said, “I definitely feel stronger now than I was five years ago, before I moved to New York in the first place.”

“Don't blame ya,” he told her with a shake of his head and the little gray tuft over his head waved about like a little flag. “Five years—you've been through a lot, Samantha.”

“I really have,” she said in a low voice. “I really genuinely have, Alex.”

Louie strode past them right then with little black gloves on his hands. He gave his hair a slight toss back and showed her a grin.

“Poison garden,” she declared.

“Poison mother fuckin' garden,” he echoed her as part of his greeting and he gave her a bump of the fist.

“I don't know what that means,” Alex confessed, “but poison garden!”

Sam and Louie burst out laughing at that.

“When we were on a road trip together,” she explained to him, “we talked about starting a garden that's consisted of nothing but poison plants.”

Alex froze for a second, and then he burst out laughing, and then he looked on at her with a mortified look on his face.

“Poison plants? Like—deadly nightshade and—”

“Oleanders, too,” Louie added.

“Yeah, we discussed oleanders,” Sam continued, “mainly because they grow like weeds in the south land in particular. But yeah, deadly nightshade, oleanders, strychnine, among others. You can join us if you so wish, Alex.”

“I'd rather have a stake in it, thank you,” he said with a nervous chuckle.

“A stake in poison!” Louie declared. “Right on.”

“A stake in poison and sex tape,” Sam blurted out, to which Alex shushed her, but Louie had already walked away at that point. Marla returned out of the bathroom, still with the bundle in her arms.

"Marla!" Sam called out to her, and she padded closer to the doorway.

"Did Bill ever get the thing?" Marla hesitated for a second and then her face lit up.

"He did, as a matter of fact! Dave called me right before I flew out here and he said 'the eagle has landed.'"

"Hell yeah," Alex declared with a mischievous grin on his face.

"By the way," Sam added, "you look like a mom holding that baby in your arms." She turned to Alex. "Wouldn't you agree, Alex? She looks like a mom."

"Yeah, even with the green hair," he said.

Marla shrugged her shoulders.

"I dunno 'bout that," she confessed. "I've never felt like mommy type like with Aurora back here. But, I'll take that as a compliment, though. Thanks, guys." She showed them a smile before she ducked back onto the porch.

"Speaking of mommies," Alex said under his breath, and Sam took a glimpse over at him.

"What'd you say?" she asked him.

"Nothing." And he continued plucking and messing with the dials.

[shemakesmusic-uk]

Texan-born, Brooklyn-based singer-songwriter and TikTok personality Allison Ponthier makes a splash with 'Cowboy' – it's the enthralling first taste of her upcoming EP. Finding a path away from her conservative upbringing, queer singer-songwriter Allison Ponthier is another artist making country music her own. Taking references from Kacey Musgraves and Orville Peck, Ponthier's take on the genre is high camp and features a kaleidoscopic visual world too. Growing a huge following on TikTok, 'Cowboy' marks the start of a whole new chapter for Ponthier with her debut release with Interscope and Polydor. The track itself references her move from the bible belt to New York City and her journey accepting her sexuality. Warm and inviting 'Cowboy' is cinematic pop with some real heart-on-sleeve confessional songwriting. Complete with a masterful music video that runs like a mini-movie complete with impressive special effects, on reflection, cinematic is an understatement. The video itself is a striking and exciting introduction to this new artist, “I probably watch movies more than I listen to music,” Ponthier says of the video. The clip, directed by Jordan Bahat (Christine and the Queens) adds a whole new cosmic energy to the track and aims to amplify the lyrics' detailed storytelling. As she unveils more of her forthcoming debut EP, Ponthier explains what we can expect from her; “a lot of my songs are about being uncomfortable in your own skin but getting to know yourself better, figuring out who you really are.” [via the Line Of Best Fit]

Miley Cyrus has shared the full video for 'Angels Like You'. The pop rebel returned in 2020 with her excellent album Plastic Hearts, a series of superb empowerment anthems. Album highlight 'Angels Like You' has received the video treatment, shot at the Superbowl in front of an audience of fully vaccinated healthcare workers. Miley has also provided a note for the video describing her feelings of gratitude to these workers. [via Clash]

LA punk four-piece The Paranoyds have dropped a new video for track 'Egg Salad', taken from their album Carnage Bargain which is out now on Suicide Squeeze. The video's director Nicole Stunwyck comments "The video presents the glitzy & glamorous world of a teenage girl who, after accidentally catching a beauty pageant on TV, dreams of her rise to stardom & subsequent downfall... It’s not a commentary on anything but an experimental depiction of my own personal fascination for young tragic starlets alà Valley of The Dolls."

Noga Erez and collaborative partner ROUSSO have shared a fifth compelling new single from forthcoming album KIDS which is set for release on March 26 via City Slang. 'Story' is a snappy, addictive song about how couples relationships are always a relationship between two people’s past and present. "Everyone brings their past experiences to the relationship even if things are great" Erez comments. "Sometimes past situations come in and take over." As with the album's previous singles 'Story' is brought to life with a captivating video, starring Erez and ROUSSO, who also provides vocals on the track. "ROUSSO is my partner in music as well as my partner in life" she explains. "This is the first time we tell a story about our relationship in a song and video. It’s a song about a couple fighting and how, in that situation, sometimes what you hear the other person say is not what they actually said. The making of this video was a 10-day couples therapy session for us. As we rehearsed the pretend fighting and martial arts moves we knew that, at times, one of us would get punched just a little too hard. It was so intense and interesting to live in this world, where our relationship comes alive in the most physical way."

After announcing Detritus with lead outing 'Stories' last month, Sarah Neufeld has unveiled the album's second single 'With Love and Blindness'. Neufeld says of the song and Jason Last-directed video, "The video for 'With Love and Blindness' came together through a long-time collaboration between myself and videographer Jason Last. I knew that Jason and I would work together again on some visual aspect for my third solo release, and it so happened that before I even began recording the album, we were presented with the opportunity to do a mini residence on Corsica with Providenza; an amazing collective with a farm, cultural laboratory, festival and residency program." She continues, "I was doing a short solo tour in Europe in the summer of 2019 in order to re-work some of the pieces from the dance collaboration to begin to find a shape for the album that was to be recorded in the Fall. In the middle of that tour, Jason and I travelled to Corsica for several days (graced once again with a suitcase containing Esteban Cortazar’s unique and beautiful creations). Besides performing in Providenza’s outdoor amphitheater, we were immersed in nature, literally staying in a treehouse perched on the side of a mountain, overlooking the dramatic coastline." Neufeld adds, "I found that the pulse of the landscape resonated with the essence of the music, especially "With Love and Blindness"; a sense of rawness, of sensuality, of a strange gravity intensified by the hypnotic summer heat and the general otherworldliness of the place." [via the Line Of Best Fit]

Molly Burman was brought up around music. At every family event, every party, the soundtrack would resonate with her, providing an education in itself. Both parents were gigging musicians, and she always wanted to follow in their footsteps, to use performance as a means of self-expression. Lockdown brought the time and space to bring these ideas into focus, and she's working to unveil a series of one off singles. Her debut single proper 'Fool Me With Flattery' is out now, a blissfully melodic piece of indie pop with some whip-smart lyricism. There's a tongue in cheek element to her sound that is fantastically endearing, matched by the subtle lo-fi elements of her bedroom pop confection. She comments: "I wrote the song after a long day of feeling overlooked and ignored by some of the guys in my life. I was fed up, angry and used the stereotype of a mansplaining misogynist to let it all out. This song is for anyone who feels belittled and like they’re being made to shrink themselves; be as big as you possibly can, and don’t let anyone fool you with flattery." The video is a hilarious showcase for Molly's offbeat sense of humour. [via Clash]

Punk provocateurs Pussy Riot have unveiled their latest song 'Panic Attack', as well as a music video that features a hologram of singer Nadya Tolokonnikova. This is the final release from Pussy Riot’s new Panic Attack EP, a collection of three linked songs that, for now, can only be streamed as separate singles. The title track features punk guitars underneath a tinkling music box melody, as Tolokonnikova turns anxiety into a sports cheer. “Gimme an A,” she says, “Gimme a T/ Gimme a T/ Gimme an A/ Gimme a C/ Gimme a K/ Okay? Okay.” While upbeat and seemingly cheerful, the synth-punk song comes out of the trauma she experienced in a Russian prison camp. As she explained in a statement, “After serving 2 years in a labor camp, I’m still struggling with mental health issues. Trauma, fear and insecurity never fully go away, causing depression episodes and deep anxiety. ‘PANIC ATTACK’ was born as the result of me staring at the wall for 24 hours in the middle of the pandemic, feeling 100% helpless. I was trying to write something uplifting to encourage people to get through the tough times. But I was just failing and failing. Magically, at the second I allowed myself to be honest and write about despair I was experiencing, I wrote the track in like a half an hour. Depression is a plague of the 21st century, and it tells me that there’s something broken in the way we treat each other. The video ‘PANIC ATTACK’ reflects on objectification of human beings, loneliness, disconnection from the environment that causes us to feel small and powerless. And it’s us who caused it with our own hands – that’s why in the end of the video I’m fighting with my own clone.” The music video for 'Panic Attack' was directed by  Asad J. Malik. He used 106 cameras to capture all angles of Tolokonnikova, then converted that information into a photoreal hologram. Afterwards, Tokyo-based creative technologist Ruben Fro built out landscapes reminiscent of video games through which the virtual Tolokonnikova could frolic. But as the visuals progress, those idyllic settings give way to a hellscape, and the singer faces off against a clone of herself. [via Consequence of Sound]

The wait is finally over. BLACKPINK’s Rosé shines like the star she is with her official solo debut. On Friday, she released two solo songs on her debut single album titled R, 'On the Ground' and 'Gone.' With its deep lyrics, angelic bridge, and Rosé’s high note at the end, 'On the Ground' is an exemplary song for her solo debut. Add the fact that Rosé is credited as a writer for the song, and one can really tell how much time she spent perfecting it for release. The accompanying music video, meanwhile, expands the story of life and growth. Rosé starts off looking lost and trying to find herself amidst all the wildness of life; she eventually encounters past and present versions of herself while searching for answers and purpose. By the end, she finds herself and her path forward, and one can’t help but smile as she sings an explosive outro. [via Teen Vogue]

On Ellise's latest alt-pop concoction the rising pop star gets gothic as 'Feeling Something Bad...' transforms a crush into an obsession. An expert at catastrophising everyday experiences, the LA-based artist has arrived fully formed with not only a consistent and cohesive sound but a striking visual identity too. That's even more clear when you press play on the accompanying video for her latest infectiously catchy track. With the clip directed by Joakim Carlsson we get to see Ellise in her absolute element as she brings "Feeling Something Bad..." to life in a macabre world of its own. “I just love dramatising little everyday feelings in life, so this is my big dramatic ‘I have a crush on you’ song,” Ellise explains – it's a song she wrote about a boy she barely knew. [via the Line Of Best Fit]

With President Biden determined to get the majority of American adults vaccinated by summer, bands are earnestly beginning to look forward to the return of live music. Purity Ring are the latest to announce 2021 tour dates, which they’ve shared alongside the video for their track 'sinew'. The song comes from WOMB, the synth-pop duo’s first album in five years that was released just before the pandemic struck. Directed by Toby Stretch, the clip brings back the abstract graphics and costumes that featured in the 'stardew' music video, continuing the enigmatic story of the domed bicyclist and their sun-headed sidecar companion. [via Consequence of Sound]

Australian Pop Princess, Peach PRC releases the official music video for her debut single 'Josh'. Peach PRC comments on the official 'Josh' visuals, “The music video was inspired by growing up watching the same five infomercials, morning news channels and old movies on my little pink box tv when I was a kid and couldn’t sleep on a school night. The idea was to have “josh” feel just as harassed the more he tries to call. Every creative step along the way was entirely my vision, from writing the music video script, to the lyrics and everything in between. I’m so happy and hope all the girls, gays and theys who dated “josh” will sing along.”

[radramblog]

Radiohead Retrospective Part 4: We’ve got heads on sticks

Your name is Thom Yorke. You’ve just released what is considered one of the best albums of the 90s, if not of all time, and you’ve achieved a level of fame that at least one band member considers akin to the Beatles. Through the release of OK Computer, you’ve proven that even if people are pretty much over Oasis at this point, British rock bands still rule the airwaves. You’re also stressed the fuck out over just about all of this, and having a very hard time accustoming to the life of a celebrity- let alone the usual mental health issues.

What will you do?

Apparently, the answer was to write the fourth album to be as far away from the previous few as possible, seeking influence from IDM groups like Aphex Twin, jazz stuff, and just some bizarro instruments and experimentation and leaving a lot of the “rock” stuff behind. The primary genre listed for Kid A is usually Electronica or Ambient, with various off-kilter rock subgenres lagging behind, crying “you’re still gonna do guitars and stuff, right?”

Well…not as much anymore. But this era of Radiohead, this career-suicidal swerve, still proved monumentally successful, and showed that the band still had it, and that sometimes artistic risks do pay dividends.

A side note: I usually link music videos for the tracks I discuss as part of each post, as you’ll have seen in previous parts of this series. Kid A, however, doesn’t have any singles, and it sure doesn’t have any music videos. So…maybe just listen yourself. I’m probably in over my head here anyway.

I think the first 5 notes of Everything In Its Right Place are some of the most iconic in all of music.

Some personal background- Kid A was the first Radiohead I ever listened to. A particular cool and good mate of mine was a fan in high school, but I’d never listened to them at all, and I trusted his opinion musically, so I went to buy one of their CDs the next time I was at the shop. And for whatever reason, the cheapest one was Kid A at 10 bucks, and I didn’t want to gamble more than that, so that’s the one I got.

So the opening notes of Everything In Its Right Place were the first Radiohead I ever heard. And considering how much I obsessed over this band, in high school and beyond, it’s no surprise that this song is one of my favourites.

Not only did this song introduce me to Radiohead, it was effectively a gateway track for electronic music in general. This was the early 10s, and the majority of what I knew as electronic stuff was the EDM that was drowning the airwaves at the time. I hated that stuff out of principle, because being a hipster like that was definitely a personality. I don’t think I would ever have gotten into Vaporwave, into IDM, or into any electronic music the way I eventually would were it not for Everything In Its Right Place.

Now that I’ve spent 250 words talking about myself and not the actual song, we should probably stop that. Everything In Its Right Place is defined by this steady build of layering vocals and effects onto the relatively calm synth line, distorted vocals and word salad lyrics and manipulated noises growing and getting more chaotic before it just stops- the vocals fade out, the effects drop, and you’re left with the synth line- except it’s been slowly changing itself the whole time, and you don’t realise because you’ve been distracted by everything else at the same time.

It’s worth noting (and I don’t know if this was the case with OK Computer, because I don’t have an original copy of that one) that this was an album without liner notes, without the lyrics in the cover booklet. But at least in this case, the lyrics don’t matter as much as the v i b e. At least, that’s what I think.

On the topic of unintelligible lyrics, Kid A has a title track! I believe literally two Radiohead albums do this, the other being The Bends (though Hail to the Thief and In Rainbows do appear as lyrics). The song itself is an ambient, quiet piece that feels something like a twisted nursery tune- incredibly affected vocals, a syncopated (?) percussion, and a synth (I think???) that…I don’t know how to describe it, but it feels nursery-rhyme-y. If you’ve heard this song a few times, or you know what to listen for, you can piece together the lyrics somewhat- and they are, frankly, kind of unsettling. What is standing in the shadows at the end of your bed, can it please leave? And imagery of the Pied Piper is always either extremely silly or extremely unnerving, with this clearly leaning towards the latter. There’s a lot going on here- especially for a track most probably wouldn’t listen to outside the context of the full album. I know I generally don’t- not the kind of thing I generally am in the mood for.

 We’re at 850+ words, and we’re only up to The National Anthem? Fuuuuck. Well, anyone who wasn’t on board the IDM train can at least appreciate this one more, it’s got an actual bassline. A killer one, at that, that drives the whole track. Well, you know, that and the B R A S S. Seriously, it sounds like they invited a marching band to this bad boy. The combination ends up sounding mostly like controlled chaos, a jazz band traffic jam wound together by that B A S S. But the bass can’t hold it forever, and eventually that shit breaks free and just, it just honks all over the place.

I’m frustratingly running out of things to say about this song I really like, as opposed to the other songs I really liked. Unfortunately, ya boi forgot to take his neurotypicalification pills today, and so I’m getting very distracted. Hopefully, that slightly unhinged nature suits the album somewhat.

The next song, How To Disappear Completely, is a Big Mood with a fun story attached. The main lyrics- I’m not here, this isn’t happening- were allegedly something none other than Michael Stipe from R.E.M. told Thom to help him deal with that massive stage fright that came with Getting Big. Fun trivia aside, this song is gorgeous, luscious with massive strings, an acoustic bend, aethereal vocals, and a background drone running through the thing that makes sure your hair is always a little on end through the thing. It’s a song whose lyrics are an attempt to escape anxiety, whose instrumentation serves more to reinforce it- a calm, melodic piece that builds into nervous swells and threatening strings. A song about fighting your fear, and losing.

Fuck me it’s a bit depressing isn’t it. It’s potentially the most emotionally revealing song the album has- a lot of the lyricism on other tracks is more metaphorical, or subtle, but the meaning in How To Disappear Completely is evident even just from the title. You get lost in the strings and they go from calming, to imposing, to downright menacing (and then back again) in the song’s final minute.

Treefingers, on the other hand, has a lot less to say, and by that I mean it’s an instrumental. A very atmospheric, ambient one, and thereby one I don’t have a lot to say about. I’m not sure I’m particularly good at commenting on regular music, but this kinda thing is a whole different animal. I have no idea how to interact with discussing this. I like it? I will say, that one note right at the end, that echoes for a bit, the one piece of clarity in this muddled, reverbed sphere, feels especially poignant, for reasons I cannot describe.

We go from ambient instrumental to arguable the most rock-song-like track on this album, Optimistic, certified banger that it is. Some might argue that it doesn’t fit here, but like, did they even hear the lyrics? The bridge? It more that deserves its place on one of the best albums around. The little way the guitar scales up during the chorus is excellent, the proggy drums and riffs are glorious, it’s just a very good rock song.

Also this is the first song with the lyric “dinosaurs roaming the earth”, which, aside from being a bit of a non-sequitur, would return two albums later. And I’m really looking forward to that one.

In Limbo is a song I kind of always forget exists until I hear it again. It’s antimemetic, the way the song goes slipping from my mind until I hear those opening notes again. I’m going to be honest, it’s probably because it’s also the most mid song on the album. Far from bad, but it isn’t doing anything that How to Disappear Completely or Optimistic aren’t doing better. If I had to remove any track from this album, it might be this one?

Watch me get fucking lynched from the fandom for that one, if I ever post this to r/Radiohead or whatever. Which I might, though as much as I’d like more people to read my things I’m also extremely anxious about the potential response. Like the album I’m discussing today, I’m terrified of fame.

Incidentally, In Limbo is also the shortest track on the album (Treefingers beats it by 11 seconds), though this isn’t initially obvious online at least, because people keep messing with Motion Picture Soundtrack. But we’re not there yet, hang on.

We go from the forgettable (to me) In Limbo to the utterly mesmerizing Idioteque. Anxious but danceable, confusing but emotive, messy but tightly controlled. I love this fucking song to death. The reason I got the particular Radiohead poster that I did was because it has lyrics from this on it.

I’ve heard that lyrics for this album were largely pulled from a hat, and nowhere is that more clear than here (or maybe Everything In Its Right Place). Despite this, there’s a pretty clear theme in them, a continuation of some of the themes of this and the last albums. A condemnation of wealth and cowardice in the face of ecological disaster. In the form of an apocalypse disco.

What a lot of people don’t know about this track is that it actually samples an extremely old electronic music piece- one written in 1973, on a particularly old computer. The track, mild und leise, is a very interesting track considering its age- I’m reminded of Selected Ambient Works by Aphex Twin- not so much musically, but about how that reason was as influential as it was because it was the first time songs had sounded like that, because it was the first time songs could sound like that- I suppose it’s somewhat similar in that way, if older. These pieces and their composers inexorably linked by the allure of technology, and how that could be used to define new eras in music history- in Radiohead’s case, it certainly defined the next few albums in their lifespan.

Jesus mild und leise is long, it’s still going as I write this. I need to get back to Kid A, man!

Idioteque leads directly into Morning Bell, admittedly another less memorable song. Largely percussion lead, plenty of falsetto, and with a very unsubtle theme if you listen to the lyrics. I recall seeing someone saying that “cut the kids in half” was a really surprising and spooky line, and, yeah, sure, it sort of is, but it’s only particularly bad if you don’t pay attention for the rest of it. It’s about divorce, dude, it’s not subtle.

Or apparently not, according to one interview, but Thom said the interpretation isn’t invalid, so haha still winning baybeeeee.

I think the only part of this I really can’t do without is the outro, because the last minute and a half of this song is really cool. The mumbled lyrics go really well with the rising percussion and eerie effects that end the track.

Our final song is Motion Picture Soundtrack, or, Exit Music (for Walt Disney’s Depression Nap). This and Street Spirit I think are what really cement Radiohead’s reputation for brutal closers, both of them being tragic but hauntingly beautiful in different ways. In this case, it’s the instrumentation- glittering harps attempting the echo 50s Disney. There’s actually a version of this song from the OK Computer era with extremely different instrumentation, piano rather than organ, and no harps (and a third verse that is utterly brutal). Regardless, this is the song they chose to close the apocalypse that Kid A is on- the final lyric being “I will see you in the next life”, as the glittering echoes into the night. Poignant and tragic, but a little hopeful- the next life hopefully won’t have the struggles and pain of this one.

And then, of course, there’s the hidden track. Nicknamed Genchildren by some (that’s just the username of the dude who uploaded it to Napster back in the day), officially known as Untitled, and the true closer to the album. With Spotify slapping it right at the end of Motion Picture Soundtrack, it’s not clear the true nature of this song- it’s actually hidden on the original album, after several minutes of silence, just long enough that you’ve forgotten you left the player running (or you’re still crying from Motion Picture Soundtrack). I don’t think there’s a real word for what this sounds like other than heavenly, and incredibly brief piece I’ve heard compared to the pearly gates. After all, if we end on “I will see you in the next life”, then what can this be but that?

 Thus closes Kid A, a gorgeous and powerful album, yet an insane swerve for any rock band to pull, not just Radiohead. A bold strategy, and yet it paid off for them- Kid A would not only be massively influential, it was also massively successful both critically and commercially- but not to the standard of OK Computer before it. But they obviously weren’t trying to do OK Computer part 2, just as that album was deliberately not The Bends part 2.

Kid A would pretty much get a Part 2, though, less than a year later. And it’s that album we’ll be discussing next week, obviously. Until then.

[worlds-shortest-astronaut]

Take Me Home

Ateez hoe anthem but make it sad and give me feelings. Love how it feels all floaty and mysterious at the start with the backing vocals.

This trend of San starting songs, esp. B-sides, perhaps I’m in love. Yunho’s voice also sounds AMAZING. Love the little high-pitched “oh’s” behind Yeosang’s part.

I find it so weird that the instrumentation doesn’t really change for Mingi’s rap. They take out one of the higher synths but the pulsing synth + drums stays the same which is different from what they usually do. Also i like how lowkey it’s been and then Mingi just comes in all rough and changes up the rhythm.

The drums + that “phhheeeewwww” synth into Seonghwa’s chorus is fun. LOVE how the vocal phrasing Seonghwa and Jongho used in that chorus. 

The 80s/synth wave post-chorus part is so funky and totally new for Ateez. Ha ha Hongjoong please don’t speak to me like that. The little throat clear he did KILLED ME. oh DAMN he went full chill-talking rap for this which is kind of different for him. Love how he managed to keep it kind of intense (and hot?? wtf Hongjoong) without it being fast or loud). 

WE LOVE YUNHO’S LOWER REGISTER. ugh LOW REGISTER SAN is also SO GOOD i’m gonna cry. 

Jongho’s lead-in into the chorus is new and I love it. SEONGHWA SOUNDS SO GOOD. i actually LIKE how repetitive the synth part is in this song - it’s kind of hypnotic. And it allows their voices to stay in this nice, low, chest voice area with tasteful head voice/falsetto. 

Woosang taking the bridge? ICONIC. oh okay San’s SOFT vocals contrasting with YEOSANG”S VERY LOW VOICE A:LKGJA:LDKJG:ALDKGJ

Seonghwa’s belt/chest voice has improved SO MUCH. Okay Jongho doing his high descant bit behind rap line but keeping it SOFT rather than powerful is new and we stan vocal control. 

They added a new higher percussion?? synth in the last chorus. + it’s louder but not overwhelming. “LDKGJ”ADKGJ the SAXOPHONE goodBYE. wish they had introduced slightly different melodic control - the riffing at the end was SO GOOD and I wanted more of that. 

San, Seonghwa and Jongho are really good at capturing the emotion of this song - there’s a LOT of longing and idk how but San’s soft vocals in the bridge + Seonghwa’s chest belt + whatever the FUCK Jongho is doing with his phrasing/head voice really captured that. 

[dreamaze]

wings i read all ur tags !!!! (lucky me being online rn hehe) and i could just agree with you a thousand times over 😭😭😭 like not to be a nerd but this whole thing does stem from the idea in theatre that really happened in the 19th century (male leads/romantic heroes becoming tenors nearly exclusively) and accommodating scores and it just swept over pop music a century later to this day. the idea that tenors > pleasant sound and baritones > bad sound is so ridiculous. (ok nerd time over) and the fact that i still have to wait for bts songs comfortable in tae's range (boy in luv not withstanding and even that pushes it) as well as in his solos is absolutely baffling. i love the way they all distribute lines among each other but it is unbelievable that the usual pattern goes jk's lines > tae's lines when they are not close in range. not to mention that while vmin songs are always sweet, they BOTH talked about how tough it is to sing together. even namjoon mentioned how the rappers have a hard time to adjust to the high vocal line keys (which weren't as high in earlier songs). like in general just let lower voices get their time to shine. very few groups do this (well) but it's 2k21 and we deserve those low notes and beautiful songs for that baritone range too !!!

Al, I went to school for ('classical') music (composition) so these nerd hours are ALWAYS OPEN. And I'm really glad to have someone to discuss it with because it's kinda been plaguing me ever since I started listening to BTS. (I don't listen to much pop music in general, so they were initially a pretty big anomaly for me.) I honestly hadn't thought about how the characterization of tenors as the romantic protagonists in theatre/opera vs. the side roles or antagonists being relegated to lower voice types has manifested in contemporary pop music, but it makes a lot of sense! The dichotomy is so outdated, and the only real bad sound is forcing singers way out of their natural range. (And I have a minor beef with how this also translates to pop singers not developing their chest range because everything is written higher, higher, but I will set that grievance aside for now because part of that is also a genre/style thing.)

this got long so here's a cut to spare everyone else --

I completely agree about the line distributions, and this comes back to the laziness, for lack of a better term, or flat-out indifference in the actual composing process. It should be natural forethought to accommodate your bari's range in the melodic material, rather than always force him to cycle through the same line rotation that the tenors are covering. There are obviously some exceptions in BTS songs (after they moved beyond those early stages of rough belting, which ?? hm, potentially unhealthy for different reasons if not trained properly). Like the ending of Sea is one of the most beautiful and gutting moments to me out of any of their songs. I will also throw out there, before I forget, that the deliberate choice to have Tae sing at the top of his register can be very effective. Specifically, I am thinking of his line 'Kill me softly' in the bridge of Blood Sweat & Tears. It is strained, particularly in that era of recording, but it works because it feels like a conscious choice that both reflects the text and heightens the drama of that moment. But for the most part ... again, it seems like the majority of his assignments are out of convenience to the tenors and to spare the composers the challenge (???) of writing something that is just a little different. And it's not like he would never share lines, because there is overlap between his range and a lower/mid tenor. I suppose the real frustration from me is that with a little bit of creativity and intentionality, this shouldn't be that difficult??

It broke my heart a little when he said that Friends was really challenging for him because I love vmin as a duo. I really wish it was easier for them. I get that the genre is a bit of a limiting factor here because the harmonizing is never going to be that complex. But their parallel octaves in Blue & Grey are SO BEAUTIFUL and showed to me at least that there are ways they can make it work. (Also side note, I think B&G is one of their strongest and most thoughtful instances of line rotation, bless u Tae.) And it's been a little while since I've listened to it, but their Fix You cover was also a fantastic example of how they can all (rap line included!) harmonize comfortably when the key is a little lower. (Rant topic for another time since I'm already rambling too much here: also, why such a hard division between vocal and rap lines?? Give them all good vocal training, it will help their voices grow whether they're singing or rapping! HOBI VOCAL LINE WHEN *ahem* anyway~~~) I love the tenors, I really do, but quite frankly they would benefit just as much from strengthening their lower ends. I think Jimin said parts of B&G were challenging for him because they were so low, but I once listened to his lowest phrase like 10 times in a row because I couldn't get over how striking it sounded. (probably wasn't even the whole phrase, it may have just been the pick-up at 3'02", that's how obsessed I was!! I had to stop myself from doing it again just now.)

I've been rambling a lot and should pipe down now, but I guess I will end with: please, composers, treat your baris more equitably! Also I can't wait for KTH1 because he is finally going to be able to shine in his element without making a tenor cry.

P.S. I am always here for more conversations like this (with anyone!), and to Al specifically, if you ever want to share some theatre recommendations with me, I'd be honored. ♡

[commajade]

first of all good luck with you papers!! and did you do boa's better for the album thing??

THANKSSSS i was so stressed last night i just went to sleep lmaoo....

BETTER BY BOA IS ONE OF THE BEST KPOP ALBUMS OF ALL TIME i really wanna buy a copy actually i would love to have the poster too.... i love that this is actually boa’s take on a comforting album as well as a 20th anniversary celebration and her title track is just “you’re better than this, shape up bitch!” it’s a fucking incredible album it’s right on top of every single trend, the title track better is literally the best of the 2020 retro kpop trend along with criminal and mago. 

1. better - literally such a gorgeous track and the mv is simple and perfect. the choreo is stellar and full of killing points and interesting formations and interactions and there’s so much EASE in how she does it all. vocals stellar. everything is 100% from her smart decisions it’s immaculate zero flaws zero room for improvement. pls watch rian and simeez’s youtube video talking about their process of making the choreo part of it was made in the waiting room for taemin’s music shows for idea they’re literally Working Working. also please watch rian’s dance cover she’s so hot in that jacket i was gonna die. 

2. temptations - this is the big sister to impressionable by taemin lol. god her vocals are incredible in this one. 

3. cloud - it’s just so sweeeeeeet. cafe music, easy listening. her VOICE!!! she does this amazing thing where she doesn’t go with expectations about how to inflect certain notes. she drags out certain notes much longer than you would think while cutting others short in ways that make even a simple song really dynamic and unexpected.

4. honey and diamonds - i love the little downward chromatic sequence in prechorus. this song basically has 2 choruses that are equally amazing???? it's like a pretty simple pop song but ABUNDANT with skill and detail. melodic top line is a masterpiece. and then the classic kpop style beat switch for the bridge. the adlibs she layers over the last chorus... and the sparking synth sounds they layer over the real drums and guitar and bass..

5. all that jazz - sounds like a second gen girl group song and makes me very very happy. love the piano and the smooth brass. and the scatting and beatboxing section at the end is so cool. 

6. little bird - boa wrote and composed this to comfort people and it rly works i love it a lot. the unfiltered drumset sounds are always a way to win me over. the muted brass in the back with the drums makes it feel so triumphant it makes me really emotional! this is like end of the teen movie music. she says everything’s gonna be alright so i gotta believe her.... ALSO THE BASS IS GREAT. and the big adlibs at the end woooow.

7. got me good - sooooo gooooooooood. when the beat comes in and it’s like 80% bass. this song is for dancing it’s so good. addicting chorus. and when the beat stops and her high note comes sooo easy on the ears and then it goes into the chorus again. chef’s kiss.

8. cut me off - AMAZING. the most apathetic break up song “i’m sick and tired of your love” lmaoooo. 

9. l.o.v.e. - I WANNA BE AT A LESBIAN CLUB. it’s the lady gaga side of boa i absolutely love but so mature and retro and fun. it’s such an escapist song rn in this pandemic. 

10. gravity - this one has the uplifting western pop sound i don’t like originally but then it moves into 100% korean ballad territory with the gorgeous piano. i DID listen to it a lot and felt very emotional about it but i like the chorus much more than the verses. the bridge is also amazing. 

11. start over - my only skip on this album.... the production and melodic topline have a lot of interesting aspects but the base of it is 100% U.S. radio pop and i just have an automatic recoil response to it. this could be a new halsey song it could be a new maroon 5 song... they wouldn’t do it with the ease and polished pop perfection of boa tho.