#also dont ask me what it was that i read i dont want to think about it ever again

[genopaint]

Week 19 of the Daily Dragon Challenge! Been having a busy May! Which isn't always a bad thing I suppose. But I've been slowing down on my Daily Dragon Duties. Gotta pick it up!!

As always you can follow me on twitter where they’re posted daily

And read more info on each of them below the cut

Daily Dragon #126 - Hothead

Happy 40th anniversary TMNT!! I've been wanting do draw Hothead, or just some TMNT dragon, for a bit now. Soooo, why not take advantage of the anniversary, right?

This is my own design inspired by a few different sources, mainly the action figure and tournament fighters' boxart and his in game sprite. There's a LOT more TMNT dragons than I think you realize, so dont be surprised if I do another one later

Daily Dragon #127 - Marci Midas

This dragon's main interests are: Gold, Golden things, looking richer than everyone else, and ignoring you. Maybe if you ask reeeeaaally nicely and give her presents she'll look in your general direction,

Saw all the really good gold week posts and the idea of like, a dragon that hordes gold wearing a golden bikini came to my mind so I thought I'd try making her. I'm not 100% satisfied with how it came out but I think the concept is hot enough, and she's already finish so- yeah

Anyway happy (late) gold week I suppose, I may try to do other clothing challenge dragons in the future but we'll see how I feel cause I have a hard time keeping up with all of them and I keep wanting to draw the Axel girls in them instead

Daily Dragon #128 - Mirage Wyrm

Those who are lost in large deserts and tundras, when stricken with exhaustion and dehydration, often see Mirage Wyrms approach them. Although they are strange 2D specters, they are physical manifestations and WILL consume you if you're weak

Daily Dragon #129 - Dojo Kanojo Cho

Missed yesterday's dragon and I feel like the perfect dragon for a late day is our boy Dojo! I feel like I don't talk about it nearly enough but I LOVE Xiaolin Showdown so much it's unreal. Don't be surprised if I do another dragon from it

tear down the false idol

Daily Dragon #130 - Naten Shellie Shieldheart

This character was a ton of fun to work on and I'm glad people trust me enough with non-animal characters to design their humanoid ocs lol Thanks for letting me include them in the challenge!

Daily Dragon #131 - Raptor Wyvern

These predators can tear through the air at incredibly high speeds, using their massive claws, they can strike at prey quick and swoops them up before the poor animal even realized what happened

Daily Dragon #132 - Huggogon

Large, kind, and fluffy dragons who just love love! They're very affectionate, love hugging, and are kind to everyone they encounter. Similar to Capybaras, they seemingly have no natural enemies

Quick redraw of a dragon I did at FWA LAST year. Figured it was the perfect chance to reboot them for this challenge! I also love the other two so dont be surprised if they get a redo eventually too

[ganondoodle]

Oh man I saw your totk issues post and I agree 100%!! Those are all things that have really bothered me about playing totk, and things that made playing it not nearly as fun (the dungeons, the shrines, the building, etc).

Especially the map!! When I tell you I was so disappointed by the maps on totk, I was hoping for something new! It really just feels like a modded botw, not an official sequel.

I was wondering what your thoughts are on the concept of “what if they had sent link to the past instead”? So the surface map would feature huge differences in the land forms and buildings that exist, and we’d get to see more ganon whenever he visits Hyrule, or go out to the desert to see Gerudo town, etc.

If they really wanted no sheika tech, they could also just have it being newly built? And you could introduce the new characters and such, etc etc.

(I also think the past champions are such a missed opportunity? If botw is about grief and loneliness, and finding hope in the hopeless, and Totk is about coming together despite that, it could have been really interesting if Link had gone to the past! They could have used the past setting as an eerie reminder to what Link and Zelda had lost when the Calamity struck!)

THAT BEING SAID: I’m not as familiar with the legend of Zelda lore, and haven’t played totk very much! I wanted to know your thoughts on this because you seem to have a lot of story and game mechanic knowledge that could explain why this could be a bad/good idea!

(Plus, your discussions are always super interesting to read, as is your custom totk lore, so I’d love to know what you think🩷)

I’m sorry if you’ve already answered an ask like this! If that’s the case, feel free to point that out and I’ll go through your ask tag if you have one:) I hope you have a great day!⭐️

Hi!

im glad you enjoy my rants, i often feel like im being overly mean but tbh were else could i just rant as much as my heart desires without getting spammed by annoying people (certainly not on twitter lol)

i have talked alot, and i mean ALOT, about totk and my issues with it, both lore and gameplay wise, i dont claim to be an expert on any, though i am an old zelda fan and aspiring gamedev, i really only talk about what i feel about it, what i think about it, and by all means im biased as hell xD

if you dont know yet, the "ganondoodles rants" tag is where all my rants go, so if you are interested in reading more on my totk thoughts thats the way to search (given tumblrs search in blog works ..)

and to answers your question, i have touched on it briefly, sending link back in time before the shiekah tech existed would have been an easy way to excuse how they jsut got .. rid of it, bc they didnt, it literally didnt exist yet- and for reusing the map- though that argument falls a little flat bc ... they coud have already done that in present totk, like i brought up in one of said rants, things like flooding gerudo desert, collapsing death mountain, drying out zoras domain etc, and changing the location of the main populations would have already done alot without having to redo the map in its entirety;

the little changes to map itself really wouldnt that big of a deal if they didnt also send you to the EXACT same locations AND repeat the SAME LOCATIONS AGAIN but in the underground, like thats a fact i have talked about multiple times bc its so illogical in every way, anywhere theres a settlement on the surface theres a bigger mine below, its so stupid, the shrines conenct to a lightroot, the same, again, you dont need to explore bc theres nothing TO explore (its also extra weird bc theres one below taburasa (tarrey town) which .... link literally build with dumsda (hudson) a few years ago .. unless that got retconned too idk wth do i know anymore honestly- AND it makes the sonau extra weird bc why the hell do they have a bigass mine under every settlement ESPECIALLY UNDER GERUDO TOWN like, that just adds to my suspicions towards them)

anyway, link to the past was the point and yes, it could have solved a few issues (mainly shiekah tech and the whole "story" taking place AGAIN in the past completely disconnected from you the player) i personally am not so much a fan of it, but that mostly comes down to me just not liking time travel, i dont like going back in time, i want to play and do things in the here and now, i want to repair the damages of the calamity, find out its origins, maybe fix that too, i love to learn about past stuff too, but that more in text, no literal flashback (unless done well), i want to connect to the past but it also holds alot of mystery that maybe shouldnt be touched upon, some mysteries and unkowns are much more interesting when left as such, i want to THINK about things and come to conclusions that are logical and makes sense in hindsight even if it wasnt clear at the start, i dont want information and what to think about it told to my face over and over like im stupid

after botw i really didnt care much about the past, maybe about the acient hero who alot of people specualted to be of gerudo origin due to its red hair- which also got a monkeys paw curled bc in totk they do sth with but its so stupid and insulting that i do not accept it as canon, say what they want, there are no dog people anywhere in the past nor present botw/totk wtf is that i hate it- and its not even .. why is that the reward for that, it has literally NOTHING TO DO WITH TOTK ITSELF I COULD YELLLL AAAARGH

main point is that really, i wanted to explore the past .. in the present, i hoped to find broken old shiekah structures, old labs and maybe some left over damage and records from when the old king persecuted the shiekah for their tech, i wanted to know where the ancient energy the shiekah used was coming from, what the boss arena in the middle of hyrule castle really was- so many things just discarded and acted like they never happened or mattered; i dont want to travel into the past, i want to discover whats left of it, piece it together, discover dark secrets you can ask no one about bc all that knew about it are long gone- thats what intrigued me about botw, it felt like there was so much left to discover only for totk to throw it all away and just do its own thing .. but not commit to that hard enough either so its neither its own thing nor a sequel-

.. that wasnt really what you wanted to know was it? xD sorry i tend to ramble on if someone seems to give me permission to

to sum it up, i think it COULD work, sending link to the past instead, if done well, but so could canon totk have been, it could have been done well but wasnt for reasons i dont know and tbh even fear bc i worry its sets a dark future ahead of zelda; i personalyl am just not a fan of time travel so i dont have that much to say to it :O

[oursystemblog]

is wishing you could be a system a symptom of being one? i was reading your blog yesterday and i got very very sad, and other system content will often make me sad because i relate to feeling like, in system terms, an original personality/memory holder who is too sad and traumatized to function and doesnt want to front, only its like i always have to be me no matter how much i hate me, and hate existing. so as a result i just dont function really. i relate to stuff you said about shutting down when in too much distress, like going emotionally numb, and i also dissociate a lot. but even when my mind is on something else and im acting different, its not really like switching to a different mode of awareness. i think it might be better if it was. i wish i was an alter so i could go dormant forever. im scared that its too late to completely rehaul how i conceptualize... living, thinking, being, etc... im scared i have to be me forever. im not sure this is a normal or appropriate way to feel... and im sorry for asking something so emotionally loaded too. i dont even know what im asking really... i guess just, if you have any advice, and if you ever felt this way before you realized you were a system, and how you realized. thanks if you answer. sorry

Hi, i wanted to try and write a helpful response however it ended up being Way Longer than i expected to say anything substantial so it's under the cut

I can't really give a 100% certain answer to your question—Symptoms like emotional shutdown and dissociation in response to stress/trauma are also possible without necessarily being a system, ultimately I can't say whether or not you are one (it took me a while to even say whether or not I was one haha). I personally didn't have the experience of wishing i could be a system before i figured it out, but I think I've heard from some other systems that they did experience that; I suppose it's different for everyone.

i'd try to give a more helpful response about how i realized i was a system but i actually don't remember very much about it—I guess I was always aware that I had an "other state" of myself with Very distinctly different mannerisms from my own who was pretty consistently "triggered out" by specific situations (the other state was also aware of themself like "oh, i'm in This Mode again"), and then eventually i thought "that might not be normal actually" and started researching about dissociative disorders some more

Regardless of whether or not you have alters/are an alter, I don't think going dormant would solve the problem, even though I absolutely understand the feeling. While we were still discovering our system we were in a pretty bad place, and when we discovered our own emotion-holder she was very angry and sad—which scared me initially, and i Kind of Wished that she would disappear or that I could just be A Normal Regular Singular Person. A while later I calmed down and realized it was not productive to wish things like that, so I tried talking to her and telling her that it was okay to feel angry, but that things can be better now than in the past and we are capable of healing—treating her with compassion

I think having a conversation with A Literal Part of Myself that held our anger and sadness was helpful, but I also think it's possible to do something similar even if you're not a system—to treat yourself with compassion too, I guess is what I'm getting at here.

I didn't think it would get better, but it did. I mean it took a while and there were ups and downs , but as long as you're still here it is never to late to learn to live again and to recover

Ultimately, everyone's circumstances are different and maybe what helped me doesn't apply the same way to you, but please try to remember that things can get better. Healing is possible, i wish you the best

[sysmedsaresexist]

What you're doing is incredibly brave. We really appreciate the risk you're taking sharing your journey. It's awesome to see someone so vocal and with such reach openly change their stance.

We wanna know some of your thoughts about something you've been saying in all of this, about CDDs being separate from endogenic plurality. Specifically, your thoughts on when the two do meet. Like, endogenic systems that get traumatized and develop CDD symptoms? Or CDD systems that practice headmate creation, and find created headmates working like the rest of their system? Or folks in either category that relate a lot with those in the other?

We're curious because we exist in that in-between; a system with DID due to trauma, but that doesn't view our plurality itself as coming from trauma.

And if you're not at all interested in that area of overlap, or in sharing those thoughts, no worries! Have a great day!

This is a pretty nuanced ask and each mod has a different view on things, so we'll all answer!

Mod Signal: I believe that endogenic plurality and the plurality found in CDD systems works differently, but that intersection you're talking about can exist. The majority of resources for CDD systems involve how to deal with trauma and different alters reactions to it. If an endogenic system goes through some shit and gets trauma later in life, and can get use out of grounding guides, or how to deal with flooding, I say use those guides (and literally anyone can improve their mental health from therapy as long as the therapist. You know. Isn't a cunt.) That being said. There are also endos who are very certain they're endos when they may have.... a bit more trauma than they thought. And that's normal. Incredibly so. But endogenic communities can lead to a bit more harm than good occasionally with those systems if they insist that the system in question isn't or couldn't be a cdd system, or encourages them not to look into resources on how to deal with trauma.

As far as purposefully created alters, they absolutely exist, and I know CDD systems that have created alters with it going ok, and CDD systems who have been *horribly* hurt trying. I've seen some tulpamancy guides out there that made me wince the whole time I've read them. Not because they're cringy, but because any time a CDD system fucks around with purposeful dissociation, it's Incredibly easy to fuck yourself up by accident. Even some guides to meditation can be harmful to systems if you don't go slowly and pay attention to your body (something that's already very, very easy to ignore if your system, like mine, is made of 90% pain holders lol).

It's for that reason that i haven't changed my pinned intro as "endo-neutral". I dont doubt endogenic plurality at all, but I still find a lot of critiques in the way the two communities mix. The labels are fucked anyway lol so. I dont know what label would best fit that stance. The problem does seem to be slowly fixing itself though. I'm happy that a lot of endos are leaning away from terms used by CDD systems. I view these problems for the most part as growing pains that will smooth themselves over as plurality in general becomes more accepted and more research about both sets of systems comes out.

Mod Quill: I’m feel like that’s a great jumping off point for me, someone who is so weird with syscourse that labels don’t fit me. I believe in endogenic plurality, I really do, but I also know this community has done so much harm to CDDs and vice versa. Part of me wants everyone to go to time out corners and think about what they’ve done.

In terms of the overlap between endogenic and CDD systems… I think defining it, at this point, is frankly meaningless, particularly for the reasons Signal stated. There’s so many endogenic systems who are actually CDD systems. On one hand, I want them to be able to access CDD spaces because, well, they have a CDD… but on the other, as someone who’s been horrifically damaged by endogenic spaces, who has spread a lot of misinformation and been fed a lot of misinformation due to those experiences… I’m wary of letting someone like that into a highly fucking traumatized space. (But I also have feelings about CDD spaces in general…)

At the end of the day, I feel like it’s not my place to draw that line. It’s up to each individual and their own system where they draw the line, and so long as it’s in-line with current understandings of CDDs and they don’t speak their personal experiences as if they’re gospel truth for all systems, I have no issues. If someone says they have endogenic DID (as in, they formed DID with absolutely no trauma), it’s not my place to directly confront that person and tell them that’s not possible; but if they shout from the heavens about how people are ignoring the truth, I’m going to post the truth as I know it, with sources to back it up.

The same goes for this overlap. A system who says “Hey, I have created alters, and I’m a DID system, and those things overlap?” Cool! Awesome! That’s actually my type of system. A system who goes, “Therefore, DID systems should split new alters for the benefits it has”? Allow me to traumadump about how my system completely destabilized due to that practice. The overlap is there, but it’s not for me to define for others; not unless they make their experiences universal.

Mod Robo: Oh boy, I have a lot of Thoughts on all of these questions! It's stuff I think about often. I love talking about all the in-betweens and overlaps, and I'd love to hear about your experiences too. Unfortunately, I don't think I can jam all of my thoughts in this post (it's already long enough) so I'll just talk about your first question.

First off, I want to say that I don't think it's all that unusual for someone with a CDD to feel like they've always been plural, even before their CDD. Of course, spiritual beliefs can play a role in that. Let's put spiritual reasonings aside though and look at it from a purely psychological view. It's our belief that all of our alters -- everything that can be them, will become them, etc. -- it's all there from the start. We don't believe that alters come out of a vacuum. All of my alters were born the day our body was born. Many of us did not exist as alters yet, but the foundation for us existed!

To give a personal example: some of us have memories of childhood that predate our existence as alters. These memories predate our knowledge of being a system or having DID. We've wondered how it's possible to have memories that predate our existence as alters. How is it possible for several alters to have these same memories, and feel as if it's their own but also not? How is it possible that we can't really attribute "who" those memories belong to other than just...us? All of us? It didn't fit into the mainstream idea that alters are supposed to be these distinct, clear-cut people sharing a body, with separate memories and no overlap, no utterance of our existence before becoming a separate alter.

Children aren't born with an integrated self. You probably know the whole spiel -- the mind integrates as you get older, blah blah blah. So, in our opinion, we were never not plural. We had an unintegrated mind full of parts as a child, and we grew up into an adult with an unintegrated mind full of parts and eventually a DID diagnosis.

I get that some people don't see themselves as existing before their CDD and that's okay, I understand that. I also relate to that, in a way! It can be weird to consider because you as the alter didn't exist until later on. But you as the brain did, if that makes sense.

All that being said, I believe that "endogenic CDDs" are a completely separate concept from "endogenic systems with CDDs." CDDs are diagnoses -- they have specified symptoms, diagnostic criteria, and treatment. Diagnoses are not people. You are. That's why plurality is such an incredibly personal thing, after all. We're literally talking about your own mind. Your self/selves. Your internal reality. No duh there are gonna be people who conceptualize and talk about it in different ways. Like, I firmly believe that's NEVER going to be clear cut and easy to understand.

OG Dude: First, I have to say, thank you to my mods. Their responses are fantastic, I support all of them. I brought them all in pretty early, and I wouldn't be where I am without them. Their pro/endo patience while I went back and forth, screamed and yelled... I love them. I love that they saw the good in me and decided to help me run this blog.

I agree with all that they said. For clarity sake, I'll give my own thoughts, even if they overlap or repeat.

I've posted from the beginning about how a lot of things that endogenic systems talked about were actually really normal in DID systems. Created alters, characters that take on life, MADD, loving your system, dysfunction in different areas of life, on and on. I think there's more intersection than a lot of people realize, but I really like how Robo talked about personal views. It took a really long time to realize that people defining their experiences in different ways isn't necessarily a bad thing, though it's unfortunate that sometimes this confuses systems that are still learning.

Yelling and screaming isn't going to help, though. There's another ask coming, this one about my thoughts on sophie, that I think will tie into this point and expand on it a lot more, so for now, I'll move on.

I don't have all the answers. I think CDDs are something extremely specific-- I think in a few more years, diagnosis will involve brain scans, biomarkers, and we'll be able to say with a lot more certainty where that line is, and what's different.

For now, I think I've learned that the best thing I can do for myself, and everyone else, endo or CDD, is just keep pumping out information.

A couple users on here are really good examples of these lines. They have CPTSD, PTSD, whatever else they've got going on, but they still hold the belief that their plurality and CPTSD are unrelated. It took a long time to come to terms with balancing respect for that self-determination, and my expectations of technology and the specificity of CDDs (meaning like, specific biomarkers).

In the end, I realized that it boiled down to, "are people getting the help they need?" Because in the end, that's all that matters, and if someone doesn't think they need help, why am I arguing? If someone does, who am I to keep them from resources?

What if that technology doesn't reach the mainstream, what if it's decades before it's refined enough to be financially feasible in diagnosis? What if people come out with the exact same brain structure as someone with DID and still refuse to admit that the plurality is related?

Well, shit, I don't know, but I'm guessing the answer is still going to be, "Don't yell at them, respect their self-determination."

I still firmly believe that plurality and CDDs are different things. I think that treatment for CPTSD and PTSD are different, and many endos without longterm, repetitive trauma in childhood have PTSD, and would benefit more from those spaces and resources than CDD/CPTSD spaces. However, I also admit that a general PTSD space isn't going to be prepared for the complex interplay of plurality and PTSD. All that said, it's not my job to tell someone which they have, my job should be to present information on both to everyone and let people come to their own conclusions.

It's hard, but it's a skill I'm still trying to learn. Seeing more people talk about their experiences is probably the only thing that's going to help make it easier.

[polly-pocket13]

Hiii! i rlly love ur fanfic's and i was wonder if u would write ff Dabi x reader on the base of song "bad idea, right?" by Olivia Rodrigo. Feel free to skip if u feel uncomfortable with this ask

also i thing Dabi is perfect for this, but u can change him to any other character if u dont write for him

lov u 💗

bad idea right?

touya todoroki x fem!reader 

warnings: alcohol, toxic relationship, language, bad english, bad grammar, kind of manhandling  

a/n: First of all, thank you. You are so sweet, and I am sending love to you. The next thing, I love the song and I love the idea. I hope you will enjoy what I created. <3

The music in the club was very loud, so you didn't even notice that you had received a message.

However, you noticed the second message that followed 10 minutes later.

See you tonight? 10:22 pm

Don't ignore me. 10:32 pm 

You just stared at your phone. You haven't heard from him for about two months now. After he ended the relationship four months ago, him and you had regularly sex dates. He texted you, and you went over to him. You fucked and the next morning you left. This scenario repeated over and over again. Then he abruptly stopped texting you and didn't respond to your messages anymore.

You thought that's it.

He shattered your heart once again.

The last two months, you isolated yourself after work at home and cried your eyes out. 

The only things you were doing was working, eating and crying yourself to sleep.

Only today, your friends finally got you out. They forced you to go to the club with them.

“Y/NNNN, IS EVERYTHING ALRIGHT?” your best friend asked and brought you back to reality. 

“I NEED MORE ALCOHOL.” you just answered her and she nodded. “I WILL GET SOME.” she told you and turned away to walk to the bar.

touya, it is bad idea 10:49 pm 

You texted him and instantly got a text as an answerer.

Location📍 10:49 pm

You rolled your eyes and putted your phone away. 

Just in time, your friend arrived with shots. Two seconds later, they were empty. 

“THE NEXT ROUND IS ON ME.” you screamed and went to the bar to get the next round. 

After that, there was another round, and then another round, and so on.

You little brat. I told you to not ignoring me.  11:11pm

Your phone vibrated and you bit your lip. 

You are fucking miss him, and maybe you two just could talk like friends or such sort of thing. 

So you can finally forget him. 

No. 

That's a bad idea, right?

So you ignored his message again. 

Where are you? Are you with someone else? 11:15 pm   Correct me if I am wrong, bur I dont think ths is your business anymore. 11:17 pm  Fuck 11:18pm  Where are you, Y/N? 11:18 pm  Answer your fucking phone, woman. 11:25 pm  Send an Image 11:26 pm  I am busssy tonight. 11:26 pm

He may leave you now alone. 

You sent him a picture of you dancing and some random guy was standing behind you. It looked like you both danced together.

This photo made your friend earlier to post on her Instagram. Now it also has a benefit for you.

You looked at your phone. He left you on read.

You sighed. 

Did you do the wrong thing?

Maybe you both could have reconnected if you just went to him. 

You went to the bathroom and washed your face with cold water. The alcohol makes you feel very sleepy and you acutely just want to go home. You hope the cold water will wake you up a little bit. 

“I knew you lied.” you suddenly heard a very familiar voice behind you. You turned around and saw Dabi who was standing in the door frame and smirked at you.

“This is the lady's restroom. I don't think you should be here. You don't look like a woman to me, Sir.” you said and took a paper towel to dry your face. 

“Stop playing fucking games with me, Brat.” he spit out, and his smirk left his face.

“I am not doing anything with you. I am leaving now the lady's restroom, so I can leave with the cute boy I met today. So if you were so friendly to let me through the door.” you said and walked to the door.

“I told you, stop messing with me.” he said angrily. You rolled your eyes. You wanted to push him away so you could go through the door, but touya grabbed you and pushed you against the wall next to the door.

“What is that for an attitude?” he asked you and stared you directly in your eyes.

This was the first time today you really looked at him and his beautiful blue eyes. Before, you tried to avoid his face and looked most of the time at the floor.

“Touya, please let me go.” you said quietly and tried to get out of his grip.  

“No, you won't go to this little piece of shit. He doesn't deserve you.” he told you and tucked a strand of your hair behind your ear. 

“I know I am an Asshole. But I am an Asshole who missed you. I missed you so much.” he whispers in your ear and your knees started to get weak.

You didn't know what to say.  

What to think.

Your brain just goes “Ahhh” 

Fuck it. 

The next thing you did was kiss him.

Your brain just turned off and there was just touya and you.

[ihatelifesm]

Can you do another S/O is a Dark lord reincarnated but with other Lumine and Archons like Ei, Zhongi, and Nahida? I'm curious what the Archons would think the one they love is the dark lord they destroyed all those years ago reincarnated but they are not aware of their past life.

(Ty for the first request of the day annon! This is mostly angst becuase i was feeling a bit silly but i did a little fluff for nahida TW: SUICIDE, DEATH/EXECUTION)

Sheep in Wolfs clothing

Lumine

•When she found out your past life was the dark lord she was schocked

•Paimon said that you to should break up for the greater good but She thinks she should ask you first

•”I dont know what your talking about! Theres no way!” You responded but lumine didnt believe you

•She thought you were lying so she did what was best for her left you, you tried to reason with lumine but she didnt listen just pushing you away leaving you with your tears on your face

•Finally when she realizes what shes done she doesnt know what to do, she just cut off the person that helped her through her adventures, made her smile, laugh, happy and becuase of her choice your gone now

“Im sorry [NAME]..”

Raiden Ei

•She jumped to conclusions quick, what if you were plotting against her? You were USING her so you can trap the whole world into darkness were you?!

•She confronted you as soon as she found out, when you said you aren’t familiar on what she means she did that believe you

•She had Hatamotos (Inazuma Guards) take you away saying the 5 worfd that broke your heart

“Your execution is tomorrow, traitor”

•You pleaded trying to get her to understand but she would just turn away blinded by her pride

•The day came, you were in front of everyone you were trembling in fear as everyone was booing you throwing things at you, but Raiden didnt care you were the traitor, right?

•Raiden walked up behind you her blade raising into the air

“Any last words?”

“I love you—“

•right agter those words you would fall to the ground, a lifeless body as everyone was cheering and happy! Raiden should be to.. shouldnt she?•

•She was angry at herself, not only she killed the person that LOVED HER she will never feel her touch, her lips against hers, arms rapped around her, hands through her head She realized it was her doing..

“Please [NAME] in another life..forgive me”

Zhongli

•He most likely found out through Xiao or Ganyu so when he did he was conflicted on what to do

•Ganyu said he should keep you close to make sure nothing happens, but Xiao thinks he should banish you

•So zhongli picked, you HAD to go

•He confronted you about it and you said you didnt know, thats what made him want to kick you out more

“You were using this whole time werent you”

•He wasnt going to kick you out just then in there, no.. he was going to make everyone look at you there stares were in disgust, telling at you

“DISGRACE!”

“MONSTER”

“YOU WHORE”

•You walked out of there in shame having no where to go then one place

•Zhongli had thought he had done the right thing for liyue, Yes, he didnt want you, a traitor to put it into darkness again! Well thats what ye thought until he saw your body hanging from a tree lifeless and a tear stained face

“Darling..Oh my sweet sweet darling.. Im so sorry”

Nahida

•She first found out by reading a book, the looks, features.. hair, smile, hands, body all looked the same

•So of course she didnt jump to conclusions and she asked you first you saying you didnt know gave her peace

•She kept that a secret so no one else could harm you but she also reads your mind from time to time but there isnt any indication that you remember anything

“Its ok Dear! Im not mad!”

(Finished!! Hope you enjoyed!)

[okiankeno]

Ofc most people who think damien is a monster are under 25. Their view of morality is skewed. Also can you even explain how he was being passive agressive? Cuz i read all his tweets and dont see it. But i am a stupid autist so what do i know..

Ok, I got two of these asks so I'm going to answer from my POV what I'm seeing. First of all, a shot at my age is very mature for introducing your argument (this is sarcasm). I never said that Damien is a monster. I am not demonizing him. Damien is admittedly one of my favourites on Smosh, and I think as fans, we are allowed to identify when someone you are a fan of does something wrong. I stated in my previous reblog that how he handled his interactions with Zayna was poor. You are putting words in my mouth, but I digress. My long-winded explanation of Damien's interactions being passive-aggressive is under the cut.

I'm going to straight up pull the Google search of 'passive aggressive' here.

Expressing negative feelings indirectly instead of openly talking about them. There are multiple instances of it in the interactions with Zayna and others in my opinion. However, I feel that people have different takes on passive-aggressiveness, so feel free to share with me what you think being passive-aggressive looks like. The points I will describe below are my interpretations of situation.

1) I think the most abundant example of passive-aggressiveness is Damien blocking multiple accounts, escpecially Zayna after he had apologized. Blocking someone implies you do not want to hear or see someone's thoughts on your timeline, literally blocking them out (until you choose to unblock them). He is not open to communicating further with people or does not want to communicate with them at all. I understand how this can be seen as him looking out for himself, but generally, blocking is considered a negative action, thus the action is passive-aggressive. Damien blocked some people on Twitter who have not even interacted with Damien nor even said anything remotely negative about him. Here is one such example:

I call this passive-aggressiveness due to the lack of communication with Damien and the negative context of blocking multiple accounts. It is providing more tension and confusion to others without explaining anything. We see the result of this lack of communication with the Twitter user above as it leaves something to be explained, the other party wondering, "What did I do wrong?" This is especially upsetting in the case of Zayna as reaching an apology with someone should not result in another person blocking another. I will expand on this idea below.

2) In Damien's interactions with Zayna, the passive-aggressiveness is much worse. Anon, I want you to imagine you are in a situation where someone has apologized to you. An apology is reached when one party realizes they have done wrong and acknowledges that the other party is correct in some way. It is an agreement.

Here is an interaction chain between Zayna and Damien, after their initial confrontation. It appears they have reached a common ground or the agreement I aforentioned. Unfortunately, the original reaction from Damien and the original post that Zayna had requested Damien for an apology are deleted, and I do not have that screenshotted, so we will go with what evidence I have here.

First tweet with an apology, third sentence: "While I'll never understand looking to old content to somehow negate the present, I do apologize, plain and simple."

Here, his apology is mixed - there's tension. If he truly understands the need for an apology, why mention the quote I highlighted above? In an apology, would you appreciate it if the other party apologized, but stated that they don't quite understand why they are apologizing? No. I wouldn't be satisfied with that, and you shouldn't either if you are expecting an apology. He could have ended the apology with the first few sentences. To me, it feels like a half-hearted apology given his choice of words in his third and fourth sentences.

Compare the previous apology to the second image on the right. Damien agrees that he is in the wrong here and essentially will learn from his mistakes. This is an apology with no conflict or passive-aggressiveness. There are no conflicting ideas within this tweet, unlike the previous apology on the left.

By this point, it seems that Zayna and Damien have reached a common ground and the conversation is over. This changes with the next tweet Damien sends on the left image:

Here, Zayna is replying to the deleted tweet on the left. I think this, above all, is a good example of Damien being passive aggressive because:

3) it's a direct display of miscommunication, where Damien outlines his unmet expectations of the interaction post-apology. This tweet contains a critique towards Zayna "If that wasn't your goal [depicting Damien as a bad person], your methods confuse me tbh" followed by a positive end note that comes off as strange given his opening statement. It feels like a backhanded compliment. Zayna got what she requested (an apology) but Damien is questioning her methods and even requesting something from her (Damien implies he wants tweets to be deleted after apologizing). And then he wishes her family and herself well? Do you see how this doesn't quite add up?

This could be genuine confusion on Damien's side, but given that both parties before this appeared to have reached a consensus of some sort, I don't think this is the case. Damien prolongs the conflict; he continues the conversation with Zayna, having expectations for what he envisions the resolution of the argument to be. This was not communicated to Zayna as demonstrated in her reply and she is rightfully confused. This is very weird – why is Damien, who has apologized, now provoking Zayna again if the conversation has ended? If Damien wanted to resolve this more directly, he could have also reached out in direct messages rather than continuing this publicly on Twitter just as he states in his tweet.

4) this is more about the dramatic irony of the situation, but I think it is also Damien being passive-aggressive – the 19k followers comment. This really puzzled me. Damien pointing out the follower count of Zayna and stating that she is depicting him as a bad person is exactly what Damien is doing as well by continuing the conversation in the way he did. He adds fuel back to the fire implying this conversation is not over as Zayna did not resolve his apology (... but shouldn't he take responsibility for this issue if he is apologizing for it?) to his liking. Damien has 266k followers on Twitter as of the last time I checked, and (I want to believe this) unknowingly has depicted Zayna in the wrong by exposing his followers to this. Additionally, In a previous tweet, Damien said he would learn from reacting in frustration. I think this again is him doing exactly that, reacting in frustration with this tweet but then deleting the tweet after. His actions are backtracking upon himself.

Now, to address something else but on the same topic: I'm not sure if you are aware, but Zayna has said she received death threats from Damien / Smosh fans. See below.

I bring this up because you mentioned that my view of morality is skewed. At what point in any of the arguments in this post or what I reblogged, have I earned the title of broken moral compass? Again, I have not once stated he is a monster in my posts. This is you interpreting my words, Anon.

I am trying to defend my opinion on how I see that Damien's interactions with Zayna have been handled poorly and that he was passive-aggressive, and it has resulted in this – death threats and a whole lot of controversy on multiple social media platforms. There's a lot of collateral damage that has been done within the Smosh community.

If death threats and Damien needing to take a Twitter break from an this interaction are not a great indication of a situation spiraling out of control as a result of Damien's responses, I'm not sure what else I can tell you, Anon. I hope I have made myself clear.

As a side note, I did not appreciate you coming into my asks, and insulting me without providing any arguments to your cause. If you continue to speak to me in the same manner, come off anon and let me block you (or vice-versa, block me). We will not see eye to eye with each other and never will if we cannot present our words without malice. It will be beneficial for both of us to not aggravate each other.

Before I end my answer, I want to reiterate that I do like Damien (personally less now given the situation at hand, but I digress), and I think you and I share this opinion at least. You are allowed to like something and be disappointed in it in tandem. I want him to come out of his break with a good answer for his actions. I hope he comes out of his Twitter detox with a clear mind and learns from this experience.

Anon(s) that sent this in, I hope that this answers your questions.

[obsob]

making and weaving and loving! like we have done for millennia!!

[lovesickeros]

can.. can I ask for an affectionate reader with characters who aren’t normally like… used to the love? like, not just through words but physical affection like hand-holding, kisses, hugs, all that shebang. probably with a few people like yelan, ei, basically any character that is either cut-off from society or seems socially distant or isolated. 😞

☆ affectionate reader with yelan, ei, & furina

[ 4.2 Archon Quest spoilers ]

× yelan

Varies between how you display your affection, to be honest. Just like being affectionate with people? She's cool with it as long as you don't pop by while she's working (mostly because she'll end up dragging you into it for a bit of fun). I don't think she's all that touchy feely herself, but she'll absolutely get you gifts instead– like pretty knick nacks? She'll make sure to snag any she thinks you might like. Like a good meal? Sure, she'll take you out to one of the restaurants in the city, doesn't matter how expensive. Her treat. If you do prefer physical gifts rather then being taken out, you'll eventually get used to the random unmarked letters and packages showing up where your staying pretty often. It's obvious to know who it came from even if she never signs anything.

Flirty reader, though? Whole nother can of worms and now it's a challenge. The more confident you are the more interested she is. The other acolytes would absolutely seethe at the idea but she has no hesitation at just straight up flirting back– she's as charismatic as they come and she's got a poker face that's basically impenetrable. She'll probably also make a bet to see who cracks first (she always wins, unsurprisingly). Probably won't get dragged into any of her schemes this way but if you ask politely maybe she'll consider it, anyway.

The smell of freshly brewed tea and the clatter of dice across wood was a common sight at the Yanshang Teahouse– less common was the woman secluded in the far corner, her lips pulled into a grin that flashed fangs and a look that would scare off the most confident of men.

She'd normally try to scope out any new blood that'd made the mistake of stepping into her teahouse and was equally stupid enough to accept a gamble against her just for the thrill of it, but she was far too absorbed in the warm body at her side, one of her die clasped tightly in their hand as she guided them through the motions– they had a knack for it, she had to admit. The thought made her preen, the clatter of the die as it rolled across the table giving her that subtle, familiar rush.

Even if she knew exactly where it'd land.

"Six. Hm, maybe you're just lucky," She muses, plucking the die from the table and holding it up to her eye like a prized jewel, "Or maybe you're not as innocent as you'd have us believe." There's a sharp glint in her eyes at the prospect, but everyone else has the sense to keep their heads down and their words to themselves as she tosses the die herself.

"So why don't we find out and make a bet, just between you and me?"

× ei

Varies between Ei and the Shogun, because you'll probably be seeing either as much as the other. Sometimes you gotta really squint to tell who it is sometimes, but you get used to it. Both are fairly similar, though, in that their first instinct (especially in public) is to tense up like you're about to attack them or something. Difference is Ei eventually relaxes after a solid minute of trying to process your sudden affection and, if no one else is around, she might even reciprocate. Just don't tease her for being a little stiff and awkward about it, she's trying. That's what happens when your only company is a robot and uh. Nothing. For like 500 years. She's trying. Raiden, on the other hand, is just about as awkward as you can imagine. She's polite (blunt) about it because Ei is fond of you and also you are. The Creator. But she's not really built to deal with personal relationships and so she doesn't know how to deal with affection.

..Depending on what you do you may or may not blue screen Ei hard enough that she retreats back to PoE

Ei usually isn't fond of sitting still, unless it's to meditate. At least then she goes in with a purpose, something to achieve– but now, she's just focused on trying not to make a fool of herself. Her muscles are starting to ache from how hard she's tensing, though, in an effort to sit as straight and still as possible as their hands glide through her hair, weaving it into a single braid.

She can just barely hear the subtle lilt of their voice as they hum– and though it is soothing, it is also..very distracting. She can't focus long enough to try and meditate, too lost in the gentle rise and fall of their voice and the care they take to braid her hair. If she'd had a heart, she'd sure it'd be beating so wildly against her ribcage they could hear it.

But then it stops– their hands fall back to their sides and their humming falters. She freezes, too, racking her brain for any slights she must have committed. Instead, she is met with a calm, tender touch on the back of her neck, making her inhale sharply.

"Am I making you uncomfortable, Ei? You're so tense.." She has to grit her teeth to stop herself from bowing so low her head presses against the ground, her hands folded in her lap, clenching instinctively. "..No, Divine One." She answers simply, trying to contain the adoration swelling in her chest.

Yet as much as she tries to relax, to ease their worries, she finds that she cannot.

"Hm." That small murmur, a simple sound that nearly made her jump, was the only warning she got before they scooted closer, wrapping their arms around her stomach and resting their chin on her shoulder with a grin she would liken to Miko's, if she dared to make such a comparison. "Really?"

She swears she must've been feverish at the affection, lightheaded and dazed until she thought she might simply perish at the brush of their hands against her own.

Much to her embarrassment, however, she doesn't realize she's instinctively pulled back into Plane of Euthymia until she sees the familiar dull purples engulf her vision once again.

Though only a small solace, it seemed a little..brighter, this time.

× furina

Varies between pre 4.2 and post 4.2 archon quests to be honest.

Pre 4.2 she comes off as very vain– of course the most Divine would see fit to spoil her with affection! She deserves it, and is obviously their favorite! Just don't look too hard because she's terrible at hiding how flustered she actually is. Absolutely goes home right after and screams into her pillow for at least thirty minutes minimum.

Post 4.2 she's a lot more openly bashful and flustered. She's really not used to affection and even the smallest show of it has her folding immediately. Now that she doesn't need to worry about being found out she's a lot more receptive to affection. Cup her cheeks and compliment her and her knees are buckling. Like. Especially weak for compliments and praise (she deserves it. please spoil her).

She swears she must be hallucinating– she had been having trouble sleeping recently. But..no. The visage of the Creator was as real as the sweat beading on her brow as she stared at them for a long, awkward moment. Should..she let them in? But then they'd see the pathetic state she was in, and the last thing she wanted to do was make a fool of herself in front of them-!

Her choice was quickly made for her, anyway, as she let out an undignified squeak of surprise when they suddenly tugged her forward into their chest, enclosing her in a hug.

Her first reaction was to freeze– her second was becoming absolutely flustered, her cheeks flushing a soft pink and her mouth closing and opening as she tried to find her words.

"I– ah..um." She stumbled over her words instead, floundering like a fish out of water. Yet she felt a distinct sense of emptiness wash over her when they finally pulled back, looking a touch sheepish. "Sorry, sorry– you just looked like you needed a hug."

The silence spoke for itself, her shoulders tensing slightly. But the way the concern and affection bled through their voice made her waver, her hands trembling as she let out a shaky breath that almost sounded like a sigh.

"It's..It's fine! Fine, I'm fine." She repeated, trying desperately to ignored the way her voice cracked and how hot her face felt– though it was more an attempt to affirm herself that she was not thinking about how warm they felt, how much she..actually enjoyed the hug. She wasn't thinking about it all! Absolutely not!

..Maybe a little.

"Just warn me next time, please?"

[cloudysfluffs]

tickling your human host is SO unfair

(ns//fw and/or fetish blogs please dni🙏🙏)

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

Do you listen to music? And if you do what artists/genres/songs do you like? ^w^

music! yeah! that sure is a thing i listen to! um. i like a lot of it <3

[the-gayest-sky-kid]

what's your take on odasaku and dazai's idealization of him?

also any takes you want to share about bsd/bsd in general?

(If you don't mind, I'm also interested in your thoughts about verlaine if thats ok 😭) tyty

who's your fave bsd character and whose the character from bsd you want to have more screen time?

i think its another case of projecting onto someone and it fucking things up. like notably how kouyou projects her own feelings abt light & dark onto kyouka. we just dont often see it that way because what oda does is like. stereotypically good? he uses his dying words to push a friend out of the dark. a death motivating others to act and furthering their character development is classic storytelling. you go into bsd knowing dazai is on the "good guys" side (not that the ada are "bad" but obviously reading bsd as a good guys vs bad guys story is. wrong), so clearly it worked out. so you kind of overlook the surrounding events yk? plus dazais own idolization of oda hammers that in. dazai tells atsushi that "He was a friend of mine (...) He’s the reason I quit the Port Mafia and joined the agency. I’d probably still be killing people for the mafia if it wasn’t for him" in dead apple (the lightnovel. im not going to go through pulling up the movie for this fhfhtndj). and so aside from previous bias people are going to take what dazai says at face value. hes thankful oda showed him the "side that saves people" and of course we're going to agree with that. the thing is. again. projection. now i havent actually finished dark era (i am working through it) but a lot of the time it feels like oda is just shoveling off all his feelings about being "someone meant for the darkness" onto dazai when thats something thats not going to be true for. well. anyone really? and his final conversation with dazai is very influenced by that. he says "You told me if you put yourself in a world of violence and bloodshed, you might be able to find a reason to live... (...) You won’t find it (...) You should know that. Whether you’re on the side that takes lives or the side that saves them, nothing beyond your own expectations will happen. Nothing in this world can fill the hole that is your loneliness. You will wander the darkness for eternity". now the thing is this is kind of a fucked up thing to say to an 18 year old with suicidal tendencies, but odas view of dazai makes it seem like a well needed wake up call. he obviously had good intentions. hes trying to "step into that solitude" but because of his flawed view of dazai he kind of. stumbles. dazai up to this point has been clinging onto the hope that he'd find a reason to live by observing the entire human experience. now oda comes along and dazai thinks hes found someone who understands him better than anyone, and oda tells him hes not going to find that. ever. so he should become a better person and make the world a good place. and also he's dying. so dazai, as we've seen, takes these words to heart. so hes not going to find a reason to live but he should also make the world a better place. good cool got that. so i think he gets a bit too comfortable being collateral for a good cause. and hes already convinced hes not going to find anything here, so of course hes not going to find anything. does that make sense.

i dont think ive phrased anything correctly here but like anyway i think with all his other friends around he'll be able to sort things out there. i cant see bsd ending without any sort of resolution for him in this regard yk.

[ganondoodle]

i often really do feel like an .. unwanted part of the fandom, i dont draw beautiful landscapes, i have unpopular but strong opinions im constantly annoying about and rarely change, dont like/dont draw the pretty young popular twinks and hot gurls to fanboi over nor do i turn characters into one, the opposite moreso, draw only one ship no ones heard of really, got little energy to interact with the few people that are nice to me and send me asks so it probably looks like im ignoring everyone and unfortunately but still rarely get so stressed i get overwhelmed and emotional about pehaps seemingly minor things and spiral almost into a breakdown feeling super embarrassed about it afterwards but the damage is already done and i look like a freak or agressive weirdo

[ao3screenshotss]

sometimes i worry about my internet footprint and the fact that it might stop me from getting a job in the future or something (i literally run a blog posting screenshots from fanfics i read) but then i think ‘well damn, if they can find all this information about me then i don’t deserve the job cause i know i wouldn’t put in that much effort to find information on someone’ and i feel better

[sasukeless]

2 If you’re still doing the controversial ask game

hi

2) was sasuke right?

ahh this billion dollar question isn’t it. i feel like this is the top 1 most discussed thing on this app for years, i have read every side of it.

to give #my opinion, im gonna go with yes. but its far more complicated, like most things are with naruto lol. i believe sasuke is right because he sees there’s a flaw in the existing system around him and to finally do something about it the only way to do that it’s to get ride of the system from the root.

now, as much as i agree with sasuke there i don’t agree with the way he tries to do that revolution. i dont mean this in a “oh violence wont be fixed with more violence” bs. i mean this because where sasuke’s goals are born for and how they affect his plans.

when sasuke finishes listening to the kages and it’s coming up with his thoughts, he immediately is bombarded by memories of itachi (itachi only, not his clan) and itachi’s words to him. when he states he will not let the village be destroyed he does it by adding “itachi’s will”. when sasuke is dying in the war arc his only thoughts again are that he doesn’t want to waste what itachi wanted to die. this shows us very clearly that sasuke’s revolution is very influenced by itachi’ wants. a little different, sure but still the same. which makes sense why his goal at vote2 is destroy the last person he loves and bear the hatred of everyone so the villages can have peace between them as long as they focus all on him. and this is quite what itachi did, just on a bigger scale. naruto = uchiha clan. the villages = konoha. sasuke = itachi.

^this is where many people complain that kishimoto had to turn sasuke ooc to make him evil and i can see what they mean but personally i dont view it as such when i look at what sasuke’s arc has always been. i have seen also that they dislike that post reveal sasuke’s character seems to be focus on itachi more than in his clan like in part 1 which i also disagree. itachi has been sasuke’s main influence in his character since day one. even in part 1, sasuke’s hate towards itachi isn’t just because he killed his clan, kishimoto focuses alot in showing itachi and sasuke having a loving relationship. kishimoto is very specific that sasuke’s biggest grief at the end of the day is not the massacre alone but the fact it was itachi who committed it. this is essentially what sets sasuke aside of other characters that lost their family/clans/parents etc. its not only what he lost but by who’s hands he lost it. so his focus has always been in itachi. so i dont think it was only part 2 that sasuke became more driven by itachi than anything else… anyways going back to the topic because im going off the rails (sorry).

sasuke has always had itachi first imo. and sasuke has always been defined by love too so ofc he’s gonna forgive the person he loves even if he doesn’t deserve it, ofc he’s gonna try to achieve that peace his brother “sacrificed” his life for (even if thru different means that he wanted you to). but while i understand and love sasuke’s character, i still think these are all very personal reasons for his revolution plans and thus why it fails.

his revolution plans are also self destructive but he doesn’t care because he still views it as his ultimate duty (again why he was so distraught when he was about to die without doing anything). he wants to become the bearer of all evil, and pain and hatred and wants to be all alone, even tho that is something that has caused alot of his pain in the past, he even talks about possible immortality and its just, well sad. you can tell hes about to sell his own doom because he thinks thats what he has to do to fix everything. he is ready to become a martyr. and forgive me but i view as that as a very tragic

so while i will always view him as being in the right, because when you put him in comparasion to most characters that doesnt realize whats wrong w the shinobi world, he will always come as one of the few that actually isn’t blind (even if its framed as bad for pointing that the system needs to be destroyed), i still dont think his plans are the right ones

[ghostly-cabbage]

I have officially edited and updated my DP fic recommendation document

I've so far only used it for friends but now I'm wondering if any of you guys would be interested...