#also hi thank YOU for YOUR support of my work!!! 💛

[ceoofglytchell]

Safe Haven

Summary: While Aemond searches for comfort with Madame Sylvi, the older brother has long chosen you, one of the Madame’s more expensive girls, to be the shoulder he cries on.

Pairing: Aegon II Targaryen x Brothel worker!Reader

Word count: 3127 words

Warnings: hurt/comfort, making out, brief nudity, brief smut, allusions to past smut, mention of sex work, mention of the death of a child, he’s kinda dependent on you, no mention of Y/N

Notes: I just wanted to thank you all for the positive reactions to my first fanfic! I could never have imagined people would actually read and like the stuff I write and I am very grateful for that. Also I would like to thank @danytar for supporting me ever since I started this blog, love ya! Anyways, here’s another one for you! 💛

⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⊰⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅∙∘☽༓☾∘∙•⋅⋅⋅•⋅⋅⊰⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅

“Look, it's the king!”

You looked up from the cup of wine that you had been holding for some time, staring into the dark red liquid, hoping that tonight you would just have to sit there and look pretty for the men coming by to get rid of their loneliness for an hour or so. While you were grateful for your job, as it meant you wouldn’t have to live a miserable life on the dirty streets of King’s Landing, there were times when you wished you were someone else.

A lady from a rich house, a princess, a queen...

However, those were nothing more but daydreams and besides, you didn't really want to carry the burdens of royal life on your shoulders. Not when you had heard for many years how much they plagued a certain silver haired prince who came to you ever since he saw you dancing for some men once in Sylvi's fine establishment. It had been several years ago and at first he had actually only come to you to have someone to drink with. A little later, he had begun to open up to you and then you often dried his tears and held him in your arms whenever his grandfather and mother once again frightened him with the thought that he would have to wear the crown one day.

It had been two weeks since he had last been with you. The poor boy had stumbled into the brothel in the middle of the night, completely drunk, bumped into people and started a fight because he had thought you were taking care of another client, the thought of which he could not stand, which had not been true, as you had simply taken a small break. You had barely run into the room after you had been told he had come when he had already thrown himself directly into your arms and buried his face in your hair while sobbing bitterly.

The very next day, you and many other people had been dragged into the dragon pit to watch Aegon being crowned King of the Seven Kingdoms in front of everyone, and that moment your heart had broken for him, knowing how much he had never wanted that title.

Now, some time later, he was standing in the doorway again, his two friends Martyn and Leon were standing not far behind him and a young man with raven-black hair was also there, but you didn't recognize him and he seemed to be a little unwell. Aegon also seemed drunk, very drunk actually, as he was slurring his words and could hardly walk in a straight line, but when he spotted you on the opposite side of the room, a broad grin formed on his handsome face.

"My love!" he called loudly and stumbled past a couple, who seemed lost in a passionate dance, and ran up a small staircase to where you and some other girls were sitting on the sofas and talking to pass the time. His friends followed him cautiously, knowing how infatuated he was with you.

You quickly placed your golden cup of wine on the side table, stood up and approached him just to make sure he wouldn't trip and embarrass himself in front of all these people. He was the king after all and you knew some who already saw him as weak and incapable of ruling, which you wanted to shield him from. You knew what he had been through recently and it had only been a matter of time before he came back to you.

There was just one small problem... his brother had also come through the doors not too long ago and he had not left yet.

So you had two things to worry about that night: Aegon and not accidentally stumbling over Aemond.

As soon as you got close enough, Aegon wrapped his arms around your smaller frame and held you tightly against him, as if to make sure you wouldn't vanish into thin air. You have been his safe haven for quite some time now, and your mere presence did wonders for his troubled soul, your smile a balm for his heavy heart. Your long, wavy hair smelled of roses, and your body, wrapped in green satin robes, clung to his so perfectly that for a moment he thought you had melted into one. Aegon wanted nothing more than you and your closeness, which was why he had come here that evening. He had wanted to see you.

"I missed you," Aegon murmured into your hair, his fingers digging into the fabric of your robes over your hips to feel your warmth. But he would prefer it if you weren't wearing any clothes at all so he could feel your soft skin under his fingers instead. You didn't even have to do anything together, he just wanted to be close to you.

"I missed you too, Your Grace."

"Don't call me that," he grumbled into your shoulder and instinctively hugged you tighter. He came to you to feel free and forget some of the burdens that weighed on his shoulders, not for you to remind him who he was and that he wasn't supposed to be here. He was supposed to be in the council chambers, talking to his council about the next steps of the war or just doing something, but instead he sought comfort from you - a whore.

"My Darling? Sweetling? Precious?" you joked playfully instead, while stroking his back with your gentle hands. You had used all of these names with him before, but he had never admitted which one was his favorite or whether he found them all to be terrible. However, you always thought he liked them better than some respectful noble title that he didn't want to wear anyway.

One of his friends, Martyn, cleared his throat and patted the young black-haired man on the shoulders, as if to tell his king that there was still something to do before he could devote himself to his own satisfaction.

His head shot up again immediately, which messed up his silver hair a little, which was not a very unusual sight for him, and he put an arm protectively around your waist, while he looked right back at his drinking companions. "Right, right. Dove, we are looking for the madam. This young lad here needs bedding in, gently. I thought she was the perfect choice, don’t you agree?”

Your lover wanted to go with you in the direction of the private rooms, but you managed to hold him back by the arm, whereupon he clumsily bumped back into you in his drunken state, but you were already used to that.

"Madame Sylvi is busy right now."

Aegon opened his mouth to reply, but thank the gods he was a little slower in his movements and reactions at the moment due to the influence of wine.

"However, I know someone else who would treat the boy well." You only had to snap your fingers once and one of the girls you had been sitting with on the sofas earlier came running over and quickly grabbed the boy's hand. She was a little younger than you, pretty, and talented. In your eyes, that was certainly better than interrupting the madam right now, especially considering who she was with in this very moment.

"You heard the woman. Go on, get going. And have fun!" Aegon called after the squire as he was being dragged into one of the back rooms by the whore you had called to help, whereupon he burst into loud, drunken laughter. You just rolled your eyes and shook your head, but a small glint within your gaze revealed how much you truly cared for the king no how much he meant to you.

It wasn't just the sack of gold he gave you after every night, or the sex that was important to you, but rather everything about him. You loved his loud laugh, the way he constantly sought your closeness, his urge to always touch you, you loved his jests just as much as the moments when he showed you how vulnerable and broken he truly was, when he just leaned on your shoulder and cried and you stroked his back and told him how good he was being and that he would always be enough for you. That was what you loved. You loved him.

"And what are we two going to do now?" you asked him, amused, to which he simply grabbed your hand in response and started to pull you along, while he didn't even look back at his friends, since you were everything that mattered to him. You were the only one who could ease his hidden pain.

Since he came here again and again especially for you, he knew his way around here like few other and knew exactly where the little alcoves were where two people could make themselves comfortable, be alone and spend time together. Luckily for the both of you, one at the beginning of the corridor had just become free, so you wouldn't run into a certain other Targaryen. You did not want an argument, not now.

As soon as Aegon had shut the curtain behind you both, he sighed and fell onto the soft mattress while you moved to lit the candles to make the atmosphere a little more pleasant. It smelled of candle wax and fire, but also of various perfumes and other fragrant oils that the previous guests had probably used before they had left again. You already knew that the hour he would spend with you would be either very nice or very heartbreaking. After all, you hadn't seen each other for two weeks and he certainly had much to talk about. You, on the other hand, could mostly only tell him the same stories about overzealous customers and strange preferences that the other women had told you about. Those talks didn't bore him, because he was sure that he would always be happy as long as you were with him.

For a moment you considered taking off your clothes and pulling him into your lap, but you decided against it when you saw that he was just staring into one direction, his good mood evaporating like a pile of ashes in the wind. You knew that look and it was usually never a good sign. He needed you. Now perhaps more than ever.

"Aegon?" you asked carefully and sat down next to him on the white sheets, which were a bit out of order and had stains in some places that you didn't want to think about too long.

"Come here, I need you," the king murmured and tugged at the ends of your robe, whereupon you chuckled and dropped down next to him on the round bed and immediately wrapped your arms around him and buried your head in the crook of his neck.

"I wish I could have been there for you. That night."

You knew the night he lost his son was a difficult subject and probably not what he wanted to talk about, or what he had come to you for, but you couldn't hold that thought back any longer. The other girls had told you how he had all the rat catchers hanged the next day and how hard it had been to watch the little prince's funeral march. You hadn't been there because you had things to do, but you weren't sure you would have watched it voluntarily either, because the regret would probably have eaten you alive.

All the time he spent with you, he could have spent with his children, but he was probably aware of that as well. But the regret didn't change his feelings for you, and you both knew that he would come back again and again and again. Sometimes you really believed he was as dependent on you as he was on dornish wine.

"They wanted Aemond, did you know that? It was supposed to be revenge for Rhaenyra's dead son, but because he wasn't there... because he wasn't there, they murdered my little son in his bed."

His grip on your waist tightened and you knew from his voice alone that he was close to tears, if they weren't already shining in his eyes. You would weep too if your child had been murdered, but you did not have one. A bastard would only hinder you from your work and you didn't want to lose your only source of livelihood, even if the thought of being a mother was one that often crossed your mind.

Especially if he would be the father...

"It's my brother's fault. It's all, all his fault. If it had not been for him, I would be far away from all this in the free cities or gods know where! I would not be king and my boy would still be alive!"

Aegon was sobbing now and you couldn't do anything but wrap your arms around him even more and listen to him speak, because if he didn't tell you, who else would listen to his thoughts? Certainly not his mother, not his brother anymore either, he rarely spoke to his sister-wife anyway and thus he only had you. You were the only one who always listened to him and who was always honest.

He wished he could have married you... You two could have lived a simple, beautiful life far away from King’s Landing, outside of Westeros. But neither of you were granted such a life. He was the king and you were just the whore he loved.

"Don't you have anything to say, love?"

You looked up from his shoulder and leaned over him so you could see his sad amethyst colored eyes and the tear that slowly made its way down his cheek, leaving a trail of wetness behind on his pale skin. You felt a brief urge to brush it away, but instead you let it fall and watched as the tear fell onto the velvet pillow that lay beneath his head, leaving a tiny black stain that would disappear in a matter of minutes. No one would ever know what you and the king did behind the curtain, but you knew that if you happened to be mentioned later on, history would describe you as nothing more than his mere mistress. Perhaps in this case you wanted to be forgotten entirely, for no writing would ever do justice to what you two had together.

The bond that bound you to each other was strong, but no one would ever know about it.

"What can I say, darling? There is nothing I can say except that I am deeply sorry, and I already did."

"Then don't say anything. Show me." As much as he tried to make it sound like a suggestion, it was a command. But you loved him too much to tell him that this was not the right way and that you were not exactly good for him. He wouldn't listen to you anyway. Two days later and he would be at your doorstep again. That's how it had always been and that's how it always would be. You would get gold for your efforts and he would kiss you goodbye and leave.

As always, you obeyed him and connected your lips with his. Two weeks without you had been too much for him. Aegon moaned into the kiss and pulled you closer to him, as close as humanly possible so that he could feel every feminine curve of your body pressed against his even though you were both still wearing your clothes.

Normally this would be the moment when he would turn you onto your back and rip those sheer robes from your body, but this time he did nothing of the sort and gave you full control.

Your tongue found its way into his mouth and you could still taste the heavy wine that was clouding his senses on his own tongue and it was clear that he had probably drunk a lot of before he had set foot in this establishment again, which you couldn't blame him for. If you had been in his place, you would probably have thrown yourself off one of the balconies of the Red Keep long ago, but he was stronger than that.

You kissed him desperately, pouring every emotion you had ever felt for him into that one kiss and he let it happen and he lost himself in it, he lost himself in you.

You managed to numb his senses better than anyone in the known world and perhaps that was another reason why he always found his way back to you in the end. But you let him in every time, which told him that you must feel for him too.

There were moments when he couldn't help but wonder if you were real. Not whether you existed, because he knew very well that you did, no, whether your affection for him was really genuine. Your smile, your laughter, the way you always sought his closeness whenever he was with you, and how gently you treated him all gave him the hope that you actually felt the same as he did, but he would probably never be sure. After all, you never refused his gold. Probably only then would he be sure that it was real.

Your gentle hands slowly brushed his coat from his shoulders and worked on the clasps of his tunic, believing that this was exactly what he wanted, because after all, he hadn't told you anything except that you should show him what you couldn't with words.

A short time later, you were both completely undressed and you moved your hips against his in a way that made his eyes flutter shut and left him gasping for air and groaning your name in pure bliss.

Fucking, alcohol and you were the only things that could distract him from being king or from wondering when the next time would be the stranger's shadow would fall upon his family and who it would be. It just couldn’t be you. If he lost you... he wouldn't know what to do.

Aegon was aware that none of this was good for him and that he should have stopped coming back to you years ago, but when you lay in his arms again a little later, breathing heavily, a light layer of sweat on your body and a happy, radiant smile on your face, he knew that no matter what happened, he would never let you go. You would always be with him, although unfortunately not as his wife, but he couldn't help his feelings and he wouldn't hide them from you.

"I love you," he whispered to you, his hand stroking your side soothingly and his head resting against yours.

"I love you too, Aegon."

⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⊰⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅∙∘☽༓☾∘∙•⋅⋅⋅•⋅⋅⊰⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅

[band--psycho]

Sylus x Reader - A Little Birdie Told Me

Please be kind, reblogs are always welcome and greatly appreciated!

Thank you all for the continued support! I hope you all enjoy this! 💛

Requests are open so if you have any ideas/requests, you're more than welcome to send them over.

I do not give permission for any of my works to be copied or translated onto this site or other platforms!

Thank you the anon who sent in this request, it was such fun to write this!

L&DS Masterlist / Sylus Masterlist / Join My Taglist

Warnings: Jealous Sylus, hints of mature themes towards the end

Sylus was fully expecting to get back home to feathers, metal and blood everywhere; what else was he meant to expect when leaving you and Mephisto together for a prolonged period of time. 

You two didn’t get along. 

Sylus knew this. 

But you owed him, since he looked after the dove you found, just before going away on a work trip. 

Much to his own surprise though, you didn’t argue with him when he asked you to check in on Mephisto; which naturally only made him more suspicious. 

You were planning something. 

He didn’t know what, but the mischievous glint that was showing in your eyes as he left, confirmed his suspicions. 

That’s why he was expecting at least part of his mansion to be somewhat trashed. 

But it wasn’t. 

There were no stray feathers. 

No shards of metal. 

No specks of blood from where Mephisto could have pecked you. 

There was nothing; everything was exactly how he left it. 

And instead of his home  being filled with the sound of yours and Mephistos petty squabbles, something that he’d gotten quite used to recently, his home was silent. 

‘Maybe Luke and Kieran were right,’ he thought to himself, hanging his leather jacket on the coat hook by his front door, thinking back to what the twins had told him a few days ago as he made his way down the hall. 

According to the twins, you and Mephisto were getting along fine; more than fine in fact, according to them you two were almost inseparable, like you were friends. 

But that was a ridiculous thought, you two didn’t get along, you’d both told him that, which is what made the picture he got sent even more puzzling. 

The picture was of you, reading, as you so often do, but this time Mephisto was perched on the arm of the chair next to and your free hand was on his head, petting him.

Was that part of the reason he came back a few days earlier than he’d intended to from his trip?

Yes. 

He needed answers. 

Though it was also because that picture made him realise just how much he hated being away from you and how much he hated that he wasn’t the one being given your attention. 

Granted you could be a pain in the ass at times, sassing him at any given opportunity as well as always pushing him to do the ‘right’ thing…but he’d grown to love those qualities about you. 

You changed him. 

He knew you’d had an affect on him long ago, however it wasn’t until recently whilst he was away from you that he realised two things, 1) How much of an affect you’d truly had on him and 2) How much he’d missed everything about you; your witty and sarcastic remarks, the way your infectious smile could light up a room, the way you hummed  along to whatever song was playing through your headphones as you danced in his kitchen, completely oblivious to his presence. 

Everything. 

And now that he was home, he just wanted to see you. 

Needed to see you. 

That was the whole reason why he asked you to look after Mephisto in the first place, not that he’d ever tell you that. 

He walked into the living room, a soft smile quickly forming on his lips as he saw you fast asleep on the sofa, your body wrapped in the blanket you’d claimed as yours after a few visits, your music blaring into your ears at the loudest possible volume. 

Though Sylus’ smile faltered as he took a few more steps closer to you, allowing him to see his mechanical bird nestled in the crook of your neck, little satisfied coos left his beak as the two of you continued to sleep peacefully. 

Of all the scenarios he thought he’d be walking into, this was the most unexpected; a complete juxtaposition to what he’d assumed he’d be walking into.

He should’ve felt relief in the fact that neither of you had killed the other, but relief was not the emotion he was feeling. 

Jealousy however was. 

The same feeling that he’d tried to push to the side when he saw the picture from the twins

That’s how maddening his feelings were for you, only you could ever make him jealous of Mephisto. 

What had happened whilst he was away?

Had he somehow ended up in an alternate reality where you and Mephisto were friends? 

He shook his head at the absurd thoughts racing around in his head; but what he was seeing was exactly that, absurd. 

He wanted to wake you so he could get some answers, but he couldn’t bring himself to do so, mainly because of how peaceful you looked. 

Mephisto though was different. 

Sylus had no issue in waking him up and thanks to the music you were listening to, you wouldn’t be disturbed by his annoyed caws once he was awoken. 

~~~~~~

Safe to say, Mephisto was very unhappy at being woken up. 

And his grouchiness was naturally directed towards the person who’d disturbed him. 

“All I’m asking is, what suddenly made you two so close?” Sylus asked, pinching the bridge of his nose as he tried to ignore the jealousy remarks the crow was making. 

One thing was immediately clear to Sylus, Mephisto had certainly adopted your sassy retorts to questions. 

“I’m not,” Sylus denied; only to be mocked by the bird in front of him. 

He was becoming as infuriating as you were. 

“Are you two arguing?” You asked, your words catching Sylus off guard; he’d been so busy interrogating Mephisto that he’d been completely oblivious to you waking up or finding them in the study that they were currently standing in. 

“No,” Sylus answered simply, turning around to look at you. 

You were leaning against the doorframe of his study, your eyes meeting his and holding his gaze; it was like you were trying to read his thoughts. 

Thankfully, mind reading was not a skill you possessed. 

Much to Sylus’ dismay though, he didn’t need to answer you, because Mephisto answered for him. 

“Mephisto says you’re lying,” you stated, biting back the triumphant smile that wanted nothing more than to spread across your lips. 

Sylus didn’t know what was more shocking, the fact that she understood the Crow now behind him, or the fact that said crow had betrayed him in such a way. 

“I’m aware of what he said, sweetie,” Sylus pointed out, his voice laced with frustration as he quickly shot a glare at Mephisto. 

He knew you were going to ask why he was lying and just like that, those very words fell from your lips. 

Once again, Mephisto answered before Sylus could even open his mouth to speak; before flying very, very quickly out of the study, leaving you and Sylus alone together. 

“You were jealous?” You asked, taking a few steps closer to Sylus. 

Sylus didn’t want to admit it, but you were annoyingly persistent when you wanted answers. 

So unless he wanted to be continuously asked about Mephistos comment (Which he didn’t) he had no other choice to answer your question honestly.

“Yes,” he admitted, his voice low as you continued walking towards him, only stopping once you were directly infront of him. 

“Why?” You pushed.

He hated to admit that he was jealous; let alone saying the reason why…revealing how much he really craved your attention.

“Because I-” his words trailed off as he began to notice a playful smirk tugging at your lips, the realisation dawning on him in that very moment. 

You already knew why. 

This had all been some elaborate plan to get him to admit his feelings for you. 

“Who told you?” Sylus questioned, watching as your smirk grew.

“Who told me what?” You teased coyly, “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“You’re a terrible liar, sweetie,” he whispered, leaning down slightly so that his lips were brushing over the shell of your ear. 

His words alone were enough to send a shiver down your spine. 

“Who’s idea was this, yours or Mephistos?” He asked, placing a feather light kiss just under your ear. 

“Both,” you breathed out; reveling in the closeness between the two of you. 

“Thought you two didn’t get along?”  He asked quietly. 

Granted, you and Mephisto had your differences, and you didn’t always get along, but recently you’d grown quite accustomed to one another. 

Of course you squabbled, but the same way someone would with a sibling.

You knew Sylus was going to ask you to look after Mephisto, because the crow had told you so in secret.

That’s when the two of you came up with this plan. 

A plan to make Sylus jealous. 

You were never one hundred percent sure of his feelings towards you, you flirted often enough, but some people just had that type of connection, it didn’t mean he felt the same way about you, that you did him. 

“Things changed,” you answered back, your voice just as quiet as his.

“Is it true?” You asked, changing the topic of conversation as you turned your head slightly, so now your lips were inches apart. 

“Is what true?”

“What Mephisto told me about how you feel about me?”

Being this close to him was torture for the both of you; both of you waiting for the other to make the final move and close the little distance that was between you both.

He saw the anxiety creeping in your y/e/c orbs as you waited for him to answer your question. 

But he knew that he could do something better than telling you how he felt, he could show you. 

And with that thought in mind, he closed the distance between your lips. 

It took you a few seconds to actually process what was happening; but once you did you wasted no time in allowing your eyes to flutter shut and melt into the kiss. 

The kiss started off gentle, soft, the two of you clearly processing what was happening; but everything changed when you wrapped your arms around the back of his neck, deepening the kiss.

His hands found a home on your waist, pulling you closer as the kiss intensified.

“Does that answer your question, kitten?” He murmured, pulling away from you slightly. 

“I don’t know, I think I could use some clarification,” you breathlessly chuckled before his lips met yours again, obliging to give you all the clarification you needed. 

Taglist:

@xacatalepsyx @the-slytherin-poet @deathkat657 @book-dragon03 @fangirlsfandomsss @evilldentists @hao-ming-8 @worm-in-a-bug @babygirl-panda19 @tasha-1994 @popcorn-mochi01 @cheesemachine44 @thegalaxysedge22 @inlovewithsylus

[papayadays]

biker girl

⁀➷ summary: oscar x australian bmx!reader - you just won gold, of course your boyfriend is gonna cheer you on

⁀➷ a/n: was watching olympic bmx and felt inspired bc saya was so good and deserved that gold sm (also ignore how i used her brother kai for an oscar substitute 😅)

⁀➷ fc: saya sakakibara!

yourusername

liked by oscarpiastri, ausolympicteam, and 1,385 others

yourusername into the finals at paris! worked hard to get here, and hopefully it’ll pay off 👊

oscarpiastri i’ll be cheering you on from the stands 🧡

-> papayalife tooth rotting 🤧

ausolympicteam bring it home! 🇦🇺

bmxtremey gold medal??

-> strayamate shh don’t jinx it!

mcaussie okay but oscar cheering her on in the stands?

-> oioioi ikr sobbing 😭

f1gossip

liked by oscarpiastri, f1fanz, and 1,927 others

f1gossip Formula 1 driver Oscar Piastri was seen entering the Saint-Quentin-en-Yvelines BMX Stadium decked out in Australian gear ahead of his girlfriend’s Olympic final.

orangemcarmy plsss not oscar liking the post 💀

ausolympicteam thanks for the support! 🫶

pastrypiastri WAG duties fr

-> formuleforza that’s what i thought too lmao

oskoala my favorite aussie driver supporting my favorite aussie olympian

bikelifex her good luck charm

liked by oscarpiastri

oscarpiastri

liked by yourusername, landonorris, and 3,279 others

oscarpiastri my amazing girlfriend, everyone 😌 sweetheart, i’m so proud of you for reaching your dreams and making all of australia proud. you deserve this so much & i love you so much 💛💚

yourusername osc 🥹 i love you too, thank you for supporting me 🧡

-> koalamx i love how they use each other’s colors 🤧

mcmclaren best wag award goes to oscar

landonorris yeah yeah we get it mate (congrats though)

formeuler1 cutest sport power couple

-> rooslife and they’re both aussies!

-> lightsin and they both go to each other’s races!

yourusername

liked by oscarpiastri, mclaren, and 4,629 others

yourusername GOLD!! what a journey! thank you so much for everyone who has supported me along the way, this one’s for you 💕

oscarpiastri 😍

-> yourusername 🥰

-> oscarbmx your honor i love them

mclaren that’s our girl!

-> ausolympicteam 🤨 our girl, you mean?

downunderf1 QUEEN 🙌

aussiegrit nice race out there

-> webbonso pls 😭 i wonder how oscar bribed him to comment that

paris2024 legendary race! 👏

mottocrox we were all cheering for you!

[spideyjimin]

Right time | jjk

⤷ part of the timing series

⏤ pairing: jungkook x female reader 

⏤ genre: parent au, exes to lovers, ceo au, angst, fluff, and smut 

⏤ rating: 18+

⏤ warnings: dilf!jungkook, tattooed!jungkook, nervousness, swearing, mention of sex, sexual tension, teasing, mention of jk being a fuckboy, mention of breakup, mention of heartbreak, mention of death, mention of grief, crying, mention of sadness, dry humping, masturbation, mention of heartbreak, oral sex, penetrative sex, unprotected sex, rough sex, mention of going through a though time, broken hearts, mention of suffering, mention of unhappiness, and heartbreak

⏤ words: 10,724

⏤ summary: following your reunion with jungkook, getting back together seems to be the right thing to do however everything is different. jungkook is a father, running the company you’re working for, and there are still things to be solved. nonetheless, it can’t erase the tremendous physical attraction between you. is it now the right or wrong time?  

⏤ author’s note: this part is finally out! it's been quite some work but it's finally out and all yours! since it's finally posted, I can already let you know that there will be a third part called perfect time. the teaser will be posted tomorrow 😬 i hope you like this part, let me know what you think! thanks a lot for your support & for waiting patiently for this part 💛

To say that Jungkook was nervous was an understatement. He’s going out on a date with you. He’s literally screaming on the inside like a 5-year-old that finally got the candy they were asking for. He’s been waiting for this for years and also, he hasn’t been on a proper date in a while. But he’s very much excited. 

“Hi,” you say as you step outside of the apartment complex. 

A bright smile appears on both of your faces when you see each other. Honestly, having had sex a couple of days ago brought some happiness to your lives. You’ve been feeling more alive than ever, and nothing can erase that feeling. Well, at least, that’s what you thought. 

There are still things left to discuss but right now, you’re both on cloud 9 so you don’t feel the necessity to talk. You simply want to stay in your little cloud a little longer which means that you’ll do everything to stay there. 

“Hi, yn,” Jungkook offers you the bouquet he’s holding in his hands. 

“Thanks for the flowers,” you reply as you take the bouquet. 

Your eyes move from Jungkook to the flower arrangement, it’s a very pretty one. This kind of surprises you since Jungkook never bought you flowers when you dated before but you have to forget about the past. Things are different now as you both are very different people today. 

“Arya helped me choose them,” the smile on his face grows bigger while remembering being in the flower shop with her. 

At first, he was planning to go alone to buy you flowers but then, he was spending the day with his daughter so he brought her up to have her little opinion. Now, she’s staying at her mama’s place for the 3 upcoming days. Jungkook hasn’t mentioned anything about you to Eunji yet but for sure, Arya will mention the bouquet to her mother so he’s very much aware that he’ll have to at least explain something to Eunji. 

“Well, you both have good taste in flowers,” you quickly smell the beautiful bouquet. 

“She’s my daughter so she definitely has good tastes,” he instantaneously answers. 

A little laugh leaves your lips at his words. That’s easy to say when it’s your own daughter, you think but his words also warm your heart. It’s so sweet that he let his daughter assist him in choosing a bouquet of flowers for you. And it’s also extremely sweet how he speaks about her. 

“Your tastes can be very much questionable,” you tease him. 

With surprise, he raises an eyebrow. He definitely wasn’t expecting to hear you say those words but he’s undeniably liking being teased by the woman he loves deeply. 

“If mines are questionable, then yours are dubious,” he doesn’t hesitate to reply, “especially your taste in men,” he adds. 

“For sure, it is because I’m still wondering how on earth I could have fallen for you,” you end up laughing. 

But the truth is how you could have not fallen for him. It’s easy to love him, and it feels even easier to be loved by this man. There are for sure many things to say about your love for him but it’d take you probably days or weeks or even more to list all the reasons you fell hard for him. 

“That’s exactly what I was referring to,” he adds. “Not sure how you fell for me, especially back then.” 

Hearing him saying that inevitably breaks your heart, even if he’s joking. For sure, back then, he wasn’t the best person on earth, he was a fuckboy after all. He was very much known on the campus for being the guy who fucks every girl he meets, and for being a heartbreaker. But he was perfect for you. Beyond that image of fuckboy, he was the sweetest guy you had ever met.  

“Don’t say that,” you gently slap him on the arm. 

“I’m serious, I don’t know what you saw in me when we started dating,” his stare becomes quite sincere.  

Now, your heart is very much broken by his words. This man doesn’t even see how pretty and amazing he is. But beyond that, he’s without any doubt the most brilliant person you’ve ever met. Even back then, what charmed you was his mind and heart. It was never about his looks because if it was for that, you wouldn’t have approached him at all. He was a fuckboy, the kind of guy that you hated. 

“I saw your heart underneath all those walls,” you say before placing your hand on his chest, right above his heart. 

Jungkook places his hand on top of yours. He can’t even express what he’s feeling right now but he’s absolutely sure of one thing, he feels lucky to be with you here and now. His hand caresses yours, both of you with a little smile on your faces. This moment is undeniably heartwarming for the two of you. 

“But you were the only person that I let in,” he whispers. “You’re the only one that got to see who I truly was.” 

At his words, you inevitably squeeze him in your arms for a tight hug, your head pressed against his chest. It surprises him but he holds you back. While hugging you, it reminds him just how much he missed it. When you were together, you used to hug each other a lot. It brought a lot of peace to the two of you, it was a moment where everything would disappear for an instant. It was a moment of pure happiness. 

Just as it is right now.

None of you want this moment to end. This feels extremely good. You hold him even tighter in your arms, you don’t desire to let go of him. You close your eyes to enjoy this moment even more. This is something you also missed deeply. Well, to be honest, you deeply missed Jungkook. Maybe more than you’ll ever admit. 

“I love this,” you whisper very low. 

Jungkook hears it and can’t help but smile even more. He doesn’t say anything, he’s simply enjoying this moment with you. Hopefully, this won’t be a one-time thing. He’s hopeful that you’ll get to do this more often. Because a hug always heals a heart. 

“We should probably get going,” Jungkook says before pressing a gentle kiss on top of your head. 

With a heavy heart, you pull away from the man you love. You walk to his car and he opens the door for you. Feeling like a princess, you enter his priceless car. It’s undoubtedly a very expensive car but as a CEO, he can afford tons of luxurious stuff. Your eyes wander around, admiring this wonderful and expensive car. 

Jungkook jumps in the car seconds after you. His eyes take in the pretty girl sitting on the passenger seat. That’s a sight he never thought he’d get to see and it absolutely warms his softened heart. Hopefully, from now on, this will be a view he’ll see more often. His face turns to the windshield to start driving.  

For the two of you, being here right now brings you back to ten years ago. Your ex-boyfriend would drive you everywhere, it would always be good. Most of the time, you’d sing along to songs he’d chosen but he’d always take the ones you two liked. Some other times, you’d have intense conversations about random topics or yourselves. Tons of talks took place in his previous car, even hard conversations. 

Honestly, you’re feeling a bit nervous. It’s exciting to be with him at the moment however, you’re a bit fearful that an unpleasant topic of conversation will be brought up. Even if you’re on cloud 9, you’re still very much aware that there are a lot of things to be talked about. You broke his heart, that’s not something that can be erased with some conversations and sex. For sure, sex isn’t the answer to his broken heart. 

But right now, you don’t want to think about it, so you brush away any sour thoughts. You’re on a date with him and you should enjoy it as much as you possibly can. This will maybe help you to get to a better place. 

“How have your parents been doing?” he asks, his eyes quickly looking at you. 

Following the kind of ‘closure’ conversation you had at his place, he kept wondering how your parents were doing, especially after the death of one of their children. Even though it’s been 10 years since your sister passed away, it must still be very hard for them. He can only imagine how it feels. He’d stop living if Arya passed away, his life wouldn’t make any sense without her, and his heart would be beyond broken. 

“Now, they are kind of doing better,” you reply. “But losing a child is something that changed them completely, they aren’t the same and I strongly believe they’ll never fully grieve.” 

Your heart breaks as you recall all the times you found your parents crying over your sister. Things haven’t been easy since that tragic day but you’ve always been there for them. They also have been very much present for you. It was hard for all of you because you all lost someone very dear to you. But today, days are better. It’s easier to smile, to enjoy little things in life, and to simply live.      

“I lost a sister and it’s already very awful but losing a child…” you start saying while shaking a bit your head. “I don’t even want to imagine the tremendous void that it leaves in your heart.” 

You haven’t had a child yet so this is a kind of pain that you cannot understand. But she was your sister. It was still a very painful loss and for sure, something you were never prepared to face. However, with time, you started getting used to the constant ache inside your heart. It’s there, all the time, and some days, it destroys you. During those moments, missing her becomes too overwhelming. 

“I’m still very sorry for your loss,” he tells you. 

He quickly glances at you. As your eyes meet, you can tell that he’s extremely sincere. When he breaks contact, you stare at the wonderful night sky. Right now, you’re feeling extremely nostalgic. Being in a car with Jungkook brings you back to when your sister was still alive. After a little outing with your boyfriend, you’d come home and find her reading a book in her bed. That thought alone brings tears to your eyes. 

Before you can even realize it, tears are rolling down your face. Now all you can see is her face with a bright smile while she’s saying some nonsense that she used to say. She used to make you laugh with the silly things she’d say. She was a sunshine. A shining one. But it’s gone now and it will never come back.  

Jungkook immediately stops the car to the side. It breaks his heart to see you like this. Now he’s the one being brought back to ten years ago. Following the passing of your sister, he was the one holding at first. He was the one consoling you when your world fell apart. 

“Hey, yn,” he says before pulling you into his arms, your eyes instantly closing. 

For sure, it’s not comfortable at all but you manage to put your head on his strong arms. At that moment, you let yourself cry. Jungkook presses gentle kisses on top of your head, his left hand caressing your shoulder while his right hand caresses your back. He’s trying as much as he can to soothe you but he feels helpless. Seeing someone he deeply loves devastated always makes him feel powerless.  

Jungkook never meant to cause any pain by asking how your parents were doing but he should have thought better. 

“I’m so sorry,” he whispers in between kisses. 

You hold him tightly while you cry your heart out. This really comes as a surprise for you but it might be due to the fact that seeing your ex-boyfriend has brought back memories from the past. You definitely didn’t think that you’d start crying on your actual first date. You’ve been extremely happy following the very steamy session with your ex and this right now is the exact opposite. 

“Please forgive me for bringing this up,” he adds. 

This is definitely not his fault. It’s no one’s fault, except for the driver that killed your sister. He was completely drunk, was driving on the wrong side of the road, and around a bend, he drove full force into the car your sister was in. Your sister and her boyfriend died instantly. So, to conclude, it’s the driver’s fault. It’ll forever be his fault. 

Slowly, you start to calm down in Jungkook’s arms. They are extremely comforting, just as they were ten years ago. 

“It’s not your fault, Kook,” you say. 

His lips press another gentle kiss on top of your head. 

“We can cancel the date if you don’t feel like it,” he tells you. 

For sure, he wouldn’t feel comfortable going on a date with you when you’re feeling like this. Even if he was excited to spend this time with you, your safety and happiness come first. 

“No,” you reply, “I really want to go to the restaurant.” 

You clean your eyes in an attempt to look presentable but there are no doubts that the makeup you spent hours working on is completely ruined. Probably you ruined everything now. What was supposed to be a cheerful moment has turned into a crying session. 

“You’re sure?” he asks with concern.

“Yep,” you directly say. 

You take a deep breath before sitting correctly on your seat and parting from Jungkook’s strong arms. His eyes scan your face carefully, trying to understand how broken you are. To his surprise, he’s just watching sadness in your eyes. Ten years ago, the only thing he’d see in your eyes was emptiness. To tell the truth, he was expecting to see that in your eyes but there’s just sadness. In some way, it reassures him because emptiness makes him feel helpless. 

Sadness is something he can help you with. He has seen that a lot in Arya’s face and in yours as well. For that, he can do something, he will for sure find a way to cheer you up. He’ll do whatever it takes to remove the sadness he caused in your eyes. 

“You’re absolutely stunning, yn,” he mumbles. 

Your cheeks blush at his words, your eyes are still teary but a small smile still manages to make its way onto your face. 

“How can you find me stunning in this state?” you ask. 

Without any doubt, the mascara runs down your face, your eyes are puffy, your cheeks are red from your cries and also from his compliment, and your hair is a bit messy from your hug. However, you look absolutely wonderful in his eyes. This is the real you, and he wouldn’t want to see anything else than the real you. 

“You’re stunning under any circumstances, yn,” he answers. 

“Don’t say that,” you shyly say. 

“I’m just telling the truth,” 

A little smile appears on his face, he definitely loves to see you acting all shy around him. That’s a sign that he makes you feel something and he loves to see it in the girl that he always loved. 

“Stop saying nonsense and let’s go to the restaurant,” you reply. 

Undoubtedly, if he keeps staring at you like you’re some kind of goddess, you’ll kiss him and probably beg him to fuck you in this car. But that will be a way to forget this awful feeling and you can’t use Jungkook to make you stop thinking about your sister for a brief moment. He doesn’t deserve that, not after all that you made him go through for the past ten years. 

“As you wish, ma’am,” he answers. 

A little laugh escapes your lips while your ex starts the car again. All the way to the restaurant, Jungkook keeps making you laugh, slowly pushing away the sadness you felt earlier. During the entire time, you feel grateful this man even exists. Nobody has ever made you feel this way. 

Once you arrive at the restaurant, Jungkook places his hand on your lower back while walking to your table. A table reserved by him the day before. The restaurant is extremely fancy and is without any doubt very expensive. This is your first time in this type of restaurant. 

The dinner goes well, Jungkook tries to cheer you up all along, an attention that honestly warms your heart. He purposely tries to avoid mentioning the name of your sister, too scared to make you cry once more. He wouldn’t forgive himself if he ruined the date again. 

Spending this time with him was wonderful. He spoke a lot about his daughter Arya, he’s for sure extremely proud of her. From what you got to see and hear, he’s an excellent father to that little girl. They are both lucky to have each other. 

Once you’re done eating and discussing, you leave the restaurant. Jungkook doesn’t let you pay although you really insisted on paying at least a little something. However, he promised to let you pay next time. You know for sure that it will never happen, he’s never going to let you pay anything. 

Right now, you’re both walking to his car. As you're walking, your bodies are very close, his hand brushing against yours, and you’re just dying to hold it and intertwine your fingers with his. During the entire dinner, you were just craving his touch, wanting his warmth to embrace your body. 

“Thanks for the dinner, Kook,” you tell him. 

His face turns to glance at you. A gentle and sincere smile appears on his face but what really catches your attention is the way he’s looking at you. There’s so much affectation and tenderness. No man has ever looked at you the way he’s currently doing. Undoubtedly, he’s the one for you. He always has been.  

“Do you want to do something? Or do you want to go home?” he asks you. 

For a brief moment, you hesitate but you’d love to spend more time with him. You don’t want this moment with him to be over. You simply want this to last forever but it’s not possible. There’s a point in time when you’ll have to go home and sleep. In a couple of hours, this moment will turn into a memory that you’ll cherish deeply but you definitely don’t want it to be a souvenir just yet. 

“Maybe we could do something,” you answer. 

“Would you like to go to my place and have some cocktails?” he asks. “I’ve become quite an expert at preparing them.” 

That definitely surprises you. You can’t imagine him preparing a cocktail but there’s absolutely no doubt that you desire nothing more than to taste one of his cocktail creations. 

“Let’s do that,” you say with a bright smile on your face. 

The drive to his place goes by pretty smoothly. The two of you are in your own world, it’s like nothing ever happened between you. It’s just like you’re back to loving each other. The crushing reality is quite different but none of you wish to face it at this precise moment. It’s quite obvious that one day it will happen and it won’t be a fun moment for both of you. Being purposely ignorant can cause great pain, more than you can dream of. 

Once you arrive at his mansion, he invites you to enter first. Jungkook stays at the entrance, not moving at all. His eyes are devouring you. This is something he never thought he’d ever witness and he feels a mix of emotions. On one side, he’s actually very delighted that it’s happening but on the other side, he’s not very sure this is supposed to happen after all the pain you put him through. 

To him, you’re beautiful in every way. The green dress you’re wearing embraces your body perfectly, letting him see how imperfectly perfect your body is. It’s not the first time that he’s checking you out, he did it quite a lot when you were together. However, this time is different. This time comes after 10 years of no contact. It feels like he shouldn’t be doing it. 

You turn around to look at the man behind you. The way he’s staring at you catches you off guard and takes your breath instantly away. There’s affection and tenderness. With just one stare, a feeling of love grows inside you. This makes it more real that there’s a possibility of trying again. A possibility that warms your heart and scares the hell out of you at the same time. 

“You’re not coming?” you finally ask. 

“Yes, yes,” he agrees while entering and closing the door behind him. 

The precise moment he closes the door, he gets closer to you. A little too close. His eyes stare into yours, your heart starts beating faster as you realize how close you actually are. There’s barely any space between your faces. His eyes quickly look down at your lips, and unwittingly, yours do exactly the same. Suddenly, the tension between you becomes very tense and sexual. 

“Yn,” he whispers as he closes his eyes for a brief moment. 

In a matter of seconds, you both end up in the living room. The same room where you met for the first time his adorable daughter. Honestly, you don’t really know how you arrived there. Jungkook simply grabbed your hand before basically running through his house to the first room. 

Once in the room, your ex doesn’t hesitate, pressing his lips against yours for a fervent kiss. Even if this kiss is the mere result of the extremely high sexual tension between you, it still feels tender. It reminds you of the kisses exchanged while you were together. In the middle of this sensual moment, this kiss warms your heart. 

Your hands find their way to his hair while he kisses you hungrily. His hands are placed on your lower back, slowly pushing you closer to him. This feels like he doesn’t want you to run away from you, even for the slightest bit. For sure, you’re not going anywhere right now. You solely desire to lose yourself in all this lust. Until this flame isn’t consumed, there’s no way you’re leaving this house.  

To be honest, a couple of weeks ago, you would have never imagined kissing your ex-boyfriend again. The breakup wasn’t easy, plus, you were the type of person to be convinced that it’s never a good idea to get back with your ex. But oh lord, this is Jungkook. How can you ever resist this man? 

Jungkook slowly walks backward before sitting on the couch, causing you to sit down on his lap. He desires nothing more than to sense more friction. This action lifts your dress, revealing more of the skin on your legs. He’s yearning to touch you in every possible way but this closeness between your bodies is driving him crazy. The two of you are gasping hard but it clearly doesn’t matter. 

You desire more and more.

As you break the kiss, you quickly unbutton his shirt, revealing his bare skin to your eyes. You enjoy the view, his tattoos in full display just for you. His body is sculpted as a Greek god. His hard work at the gym has definitely paid off. What will forever surprise you is the fact that underneath his perfect suit, his arm is covered in tattoos. It seems so contradictory. But it only makes him even more desirable in your eyes. 

Jungkook glances at you. All that he can see in your eyes is lust. Honestly, it’s all that matters to him right now and it swells his chest with pride. You can’t help but touch his soft skin and he lets you do whatever you want. The CEO of Jeon Industries shivers from the feeling of your fingertips brushing against his skin. Your lips press against his, needing to be completely intoxicated by him. His tongue licks your bottom lip before his teeth grip it, making you moan. As he hears your sweet moan, his dick twitches inside his pants, he’s growing harder underneath you. 

When you open your mouth, Jungkook seizes the opportunity to slip his tongue inside to finally meet yours. A moan leaves your lips at the feeling, and unintentionally, Jungkook flexes his toned thigh underneath you. You feel it in all the right places, making your pussy clench around nothing and it causes you to whine again. 

This unintentional action ends up being a good thing and he can’t help but smirk. His hands move down on your exposed thighs to caress them. Your skin is soft under his palms, his hands feeling so huge on your body. Before doing anything else, Jungkook pulls one of his legs out from under you, making you sit on top of only one leg. As he does so, you adjust yourself on his thigh. Your dress is pushed even higher, Jungkook having now a proper view of your beige panties, your clothed pussy brushing now against his dark pants. 

Both of you know where this is going. Probably it isn’t a good idea but none of you wants to stop it. You’re getting addicted to the other more and more, and the thought of stopping doesn’t even cross your mind. 

“Fuck, yn,” he groans when you start moving your hips against his thigh.  

Jungkook presses his lips on yours for a filthy kiss, his tongue passing past your lips and licking against your own. This feels marvelous, everything about you is addictive, and Jungkook definitely desires to bring this to the next level. Honestly, it is a shared feeling.  

As his tongue plays with yours on your mouth, his hands find their way to your waist and guide your hips as you’re straddling his thigh. A small moan leaves your lips but the man in front of you swallows it directly. He pushes his thigh firmly against your clothed pussy and flexes the muscle once more. 

“I love the way you’re riding my thigh, princess,” he whispers against your lips. “But I need to feel you properly against my thigh.”  

One of his hands slides down on your body and tugs aside the fabric of your panties until your clit is directly pressed against his thigh. A breath falls from your lips as you drag your pussy against his thigh. Jungkook pulls you firmly against his flexed muscle, and once his hands are back on your waist, he quickens the pace of your hips. A trail of moans leaves your mouth, loving the friction of his pants against your pussy. 

“I adore to hear you moan, baby girl,” he whispers in your ear, sending shivers down your spine. 

His tongue licks your ear, a little trick that will bring you closer to the orgasm. A little trick that he learned when you were together. It’s your weakness, and he knows it. Since you’ve been very intimate together, he knows your body by heart and everything he needs to do to bring you down on your knees. However, by doing so, he also brings himself closer to the orgasm. Hearing you moaning and seeing you completely overwhelmed by what he does arouses him a lot. There’s proof of it right now as his length is getting harder and tighter on his pants. He’s definitely about to explode. 

Honestly, even if you would try to speak, you wouldn’t be able to form a proper sentence. Your mind is way too consumed by this blissful moment. You can’t even think properly but damn, you’re enjoying every second.   

“I will touch myself as you keep riding my thigh,” Jungkook says with quite some desperation in his voice. 

Before you can even process what he said, he gently inserts two fingers in your mouth, and with his other hand, he lowers his underwear, allowing his cock to slap against his lower stomach. His cock takes your breath away, standing proud in between your bodies. He’s thick and long, this sight alone gets you wetter.    

You suck on his finger, coating them with your saliva, and that alone snatches a groan out of his pretty swollen lips. A proud smile appears on your face. When he feels that they are soaked enough, he pulls them from your mouth. His fingers hold his cock, covering it with your saliva as they go up and down the length. 

This man is as filthy as he was before. It clearly reminds you of the beginning of your relationship, when you had your first time together. It was explosive because man, he had a lot of experience due to his fuckboy past. For sure, over time, it got even better because you started to discover each other.   

“Fuck,” he mumbles, his head slowly going back at the feeling of his fingers on his length and your clit rubbing against him. “You’re doing this so well, baby girl.”

You bite your bottom lip as you stare deep into his eyes. The intimacy of the eye contact with the friction against your clit makes the wave of pleasure grow intensely inside you, and you know that you won’t last long before that wave hits you hard.  

“Pleasuring yourself on my thigh while I touch myself,” he growls as his hand keeps pumping his cock. “It’s too hot, baby.” Jungkook runs his thumb over the tip of his cock and grips his bottom lip between his teeth. 

He strokes his cock at the same pace at which your hips are working on his thigh, and he also feels like he’s about to cum on his hand. 

“Fuck, baby girl,” he growls as he looks down to watch your throbbing pussy rubbing against his thigh, “you’re doing this perfectly.” 

You put your hand on his shoulder and circle your pussy faster against his thigh. You’re so close. 

“Jk,” you say and his gaze meets yours once again, “I’m so close!” 

The hand resting on your waist goes down and his thumb circles on your clit. It sends you over the edge, the orgasm hitting you hard and you feel it in every part of your body. A guttural moan leaves your mouth and you close your eyes to enjoy the feeling.  The sight of you coming undone makes him come, a deep groan coming from his throat as cum flows on his hand. 

You hide your face in the crook of his neck, completely surprised that you gave in to temptation. Nobody says anything, you’re just both trying to catch your breath and you close your eyes. 

Slowly, you fall asleep in his arms, exhausted from this wonderful night with him. Jungkook feels it but doesn’t say anything, enjoying having you in his arms. This hadn’t happened in years so he enjoys every single second passed with you. As you’re falling deeper, he moves a bit and you groan.

“I’m just putting back my pants, baby,” he whispers in your ear. He does it quickly to not disturb you more. “I’ll put you in my bed, you’ll be better.”

“No,” you mumble half-awake, “I want to stay in your arms.” 

Even though he craves nothing more than to have you in his arms, this position is very uncomfortable for the two of you. It’s best to go to his bed, it’s way more comfortable than his couch. Jungkook stands up, holding you tight in his arms. You mumble some words that he doesn’t understand, making him chuckle. Once in his bedroom, he carefully places you in his bed before lying beside you. He crawls to you, holding you again in his arms. 

“Have you introduced a girlfriend to Arya?” Eunji asks Jungkook. 

A little smile appears on his face. Undoubtedly, Arya has spoken about the flower situation to her mother or maybe she has mentioned the time when she met you at his place. Maybe she even mentioned both.  

“What did she tell you?” Jungkook asks the mother of his daughter. 

Honestly, Jungkook doesn’t even know how to explain this situation to Eunji. You’re not his girlfriend but you’re not a friend as well. You’re in an in-between situation. It’s a situationship like many people may say. 

“Apparently, she met a ‘female’ friend of yours and she helped you choose a bouquet of flowers. A bouquet that I deduced you offered to that said friend,” she tells him. 

“Well,” he starts saying, “I’ve been seeing my ex.”

His mind is brought back to three nights ago when you went on a date. The next day, the two of you went completely wild. You stayed at his place and spent almost the entire day having sex. It was wild but definitely amazing. There’s no doubt that the physical attraction is still very much present. 

“Yn?” she asks. 

Of course, she has heard about you. They’ve been friends for quite some time and he has been very open about his past with you. She knows that you’re the only ex he’d ever see again, that you’re the only ex he ever loved.  

Jungkook simply nods, not knowing what to say to her. Actually, he wants to first see her reaction before adding anything else. Honestly, he’s scared of her reaction, he deeply cares about her and her opinion. At the end of the day, she’s the mother of his daughter, they are linked forever. 

“Jk, are you sure it’s a good idea?” she asks him.

She’s quite concerned about him. Even if she always knew that he still deeply loved you, she constantly prayed that you wouldn’t meet again. She doesn’t want him to be heartbroken once more. He doesn’t deserve it, he has a golden heart she’ll protect at any cost. 

“At this stage, we’re simply talking and hanging out together. Nothing more,” he tells her. 

In a way, she’s happy that Arya told her about all this because now, she’ll keep an eye on her daughter’s father. Also, if he gets heartbroken once more, inevitably it will have an impact on their daughter as well. She’ll see her father constantly sad even if Jungkook tries to hide it and she’ll try to cheer him up.  

“But would you want to try again?” she raises with concern. 

“Honestly, I don’t know,” he starts saying. “I love being with her, talking about the past, and discovering what we have become. For sure, everything is different but it scares and excites me at the same time.” 

Being around you is a blessing for him but when you’re not together in your little bubble, he thinks about the full situation. It’s extremely frightening. There’s some trust that has been broken, and a heart that aches. Also, your lives are totally different. Jungkook is a father, running one of the biggest companies in the country. You’re his employee, you’ve been engaged and you lost your sister. You’re both totally different people now. 

However, this is a situation that he kept dreaming of for the past ten years. Every day, he wished you’d come back. So he believes he can’t throw away this opportunity but if it doesn’t work out, at least, he would have tried. He wouldn’t regret and he’s convinced that he would more easily move on from you.   

“It’s normal, Jk,” she says, “so much time has passed.” 

He couldn’t agree more with her. Ten years is quite a lot and it’s definitely what also scares him. What if in the end, it’s never the right time? What if you are never meant to get back together? All those questions keep haunting him when he’s by himself. Nevertheless, he tries to not overthink. It’s unquestionably not a good idea, especially since he has so much to think about at work.       

“I know,” he answers while running his hand through his hair. “But I don’t want to overthink this situation, let’s take it day by day and we’ll see the outcome.” 

Eunji simply nods. Obviously, he’s not comfortable talking about all this right now. She’s not going to force him, it has to come from him. 

“Just try to be careful with Arya,” she reminds him. “She’s very young and it’s best she isn’t involved in our relationships before we’re secure it’s serious.” 

They established this rule years ago. It has always seemed so easy for Jungkook to respect it since he only had one-night stands but this time around, it appears quite difficult. Arya already met you by accident, she sometimes questions him about you. 

“I’m aware of it, Eunji and I’ll make sure they never meet again,” he answers. 

She smiles, happy that he’ll ensure that her daughter isn’t involved in a heartbreak. Knowing Arya, she’ll also be sad if suddenly she stops seeing you. She can easily get attached to people so it’s always best to provide her with some stability. 

The little girl suddenly appears in the kitchen where both her parents are. She smiles when she sees them, a smile they both return back to her. She’s the person they both love the most, she lights their world in a way they can’t express. This love is what will forever tie them together. They created this wonderful little girl. Jungkook always believed they did a good job when conceiving and educating her. 

“Is mommy eating too tonight?” she asks, looking at them two. 

Before Eunji has the time to answer, Jungkook proceeds to reply to his daughter. 

“Yes, she is,” he says with a bright smile, “We’ll have a little family dinner.” 

Happiness suddenly radiates from Arya’s face. Her mother can’t say no now that Jungkook said she’ll stay. Her daughter’s father trapped her but she won’t complain. She adores it when the three of them spend time together. Those moments are rare however they are always filled with joy. What always warms their heart is seeing how content Arya is. Nothing will ever beat that.   

The entire night, Jungkook completely forgets about you. There’s just him, Eunji, and Arya. This is a moment deeply cherished that will forever stay in his heart. This is a moment that can heal his broken heart. This is a moment where time completely stops. This is a moment where he’s simply proud of the family he built. He’d do everything to protect them at all costs. For sure, this isn’t the kind of family he expected to have but his family is perfect. At the end of the day, both he and Eunji try as hard as they can to make everything work, which is all that really matters. 

At some point, he just looks at them with a big smile on his face. 

Eunji and him never tried to be together. They had a one-night stand that resulted in creating Arya but never have they thought of getting involved romantically. They have always been good friends and amazing co-parents. It’s sometimes not easy but what’s important is that they always find a common ground. 

There are some moments where he wonders how things would have looked like if you remained together. Would he have started his company? Would you have started a family? Would you be married? Would you be happy together? All those questions will forever remain unanswered but he’s very proud of everything he accomplished with this void inside his heart. 

For sure, getting his heart broken made him work hard. So hard that he built the Jeon Empire from scratch. An empire that started with Jeon Industries. An empire that he’ll bequeath to his daughter. This would have probably never existed with you by his side. 

But now that he has it all, will he manage to have the one last thing that he’s always wanted? Or will it be too much for him to handle? 

For the past month, you and Jungkook have been seeing each other quite often. Of course, it’s impossible when he’s with his daughter, which is totally understandable. She comes first and he needs to spend as much time as possible with her. You would never dare to even say anything about it, you actually even encourage him to spend more time with her. Those moments together are what she will forever remember and cherish. 

As you enter the elevator, you notice at the end the man that haunts your dreams. A little smile appears on your face. Without any hesitation, you make your way to the end to be near him. There’s no doubt that you’re not going to be able to say or do anything as there are other employees. But you can be near each other, even for a brief moment. When you get closer to him, he also notices you. Jungkook tries to hide the little smile forming on his face. 

“Miss y/l/n,” he speaks when you’re next to him. 

“Mr. Jeon,” you reply. 

If anyone was truly looking at you, they would notice the way you’re staring at each other. Or should we say, the way you’re devouring each other with your gaze. There’s so much affection and tenderness in his eyes, it immediately warms your heart. Jungkook doesn’t have to say anything, his eyes speak louder than any word he could ever say. Whenever he lands his eyes on you, he always feels loved. Every part of his being feels it. He doesn’t doubt that his feelings are reciprocated. 

Scared to be caught, you look away. Being this close while he’s your boss is kind of a tricky situation. Honestly, you’re truly considering quitting the company. This is becoming way too delicate, you can’t stay in this company while you’re clearly in love with your boss. It’s not about what people would say because honestly, you don’t give a shit about it. It’s just that it can create conflicts of interest. He’s your superior, and your relationship might affect any decision he makes regarding you. And knowing yourself, you’ll always believe that whatever decision he makes will always be considered to help your career. 

Actually, you’ve already prepared your resignation letter. It’s sitting in a drawer of your desk, waiting for the perfect moment to be given to the director of your department, Kim Taehyung. The excuse you’ll give is that working in a massive company such as Jeon Industries caused you more anxiety than expected. Taehyung will for sure be surprised and will probably convince you to stay. You haven’t been here for a year but it’s most likely the best to do. Nobody needs to know the truth but you can’t stay while this love is blossoming. 

Quickly, your eyes gaze at Jungkook once more. It breaks your heart to think that you’ll leave the company any time soon. However, it will be easier for you two. The CEO notices the quick glance you took but he doesn’t do anything. He’s too afraid of what he could do or say in the presence of his other employees. Once you reach the fifth level, you leave the elevator with a heavy heart. You love being near Jungkook, it’s rather hard to be far from him. Your ex watches you walk away from him. Just like you, it’s hard to see you exit the elevator, putting a physical distance between you. 

Pretending that there’s nothing going on between you is extremely hard. This is the other reason pushing you to leave the company. As time passes, you both grow confident that this is the right time for you but one day or another, the other people working here will notice it. It will be even harder to quit then. It’s better to take measures before the inevitable happens. 

The rest of the day goes by quite fast for you but the resignation letter has been a lot more present on your mind. So it has led you to this precise moment. You’re in front of Jungkook’s secretary’s desk, waiting for her to let you inside his office. Your heart is beating extremely fast in your chest, your hands are shaking, and you’re getting very nervous. 

“Miss y/l/n, you can come in,” she says with a little smile while she holds the door. 

You nod before walking in her direction. “Thank you,” you tell her as you pass in front of her. She closes the door behind you, leaving you now alone with the big boss. 

When you enter the massive room, you find Jungkook walking in your direction, clear concern painted on his face. Your eyes scan him, he’s wearing a white shirt with dark blue suit pants. His sleeves are slightly lifted, he was for sure very focused on his work. Now you feel guilty to be bothering him with your shitty thing. He was probably working on something way more important than you, you think.

What you totally ignore is that the company is facing quite a huge problem. An issue that Jungkook is trying to solve but it’s been hard. He was working on it before his secretary announced your presence. 

“Yn,” he speaks, “is everything okay?” 

Jungkook is concerned because never before you came to his office. As soon as his secretary said your name, his heart started racing in his chest, his mind imagining the worst happened to you. 

He gets close to you, his hands grab your face and his eyes scan your face to make sure you’re doing well. He sees something in your eyes that he can’t quite describe. There’s some sadness, that’s undeniable but there’s something else. A something that he can’t quite put his finger on. 

“Everything is fine, Jk,” you tell him with a little smile appearing on your face. 

“No, there’s something otherwise you wouldn’t be here,” he instantly replies back. 

Indubitably, this man knows you, but it doesn’t surprise you. You’ve been spending the last month talking a lot, and you also dated for 2 years in the past. 

“I will give my resignation letter to Mr. Kim tomorrow morning,” you inform him. 

Before quitting, you wanted to inform him personally. You didn’t want him to find it out through Taehyung that you’ll be leaving. Knowing him, he’ll be very angry. 

“Why?” he frowns. 

“Because of all this between us,” you immediately reply. 

Jungkook takes a step back to look at you properly. To be honest, this surprises him a lot. In his mind, you were never going to quit and you would figure out together how to navigate this situation. But he was obviously wrong. 

“I can’t stay here while we flirt together outside work,” you add. “You’re my superior and inevitably, it will be a problem one day. It will be a lot harder to leave at that time so I prefer to do it now.” 

“No,” he answers while turning his back on you. 

“This is my decision, Jungkook, not yours.” 

There’s no way you’re letting this man tell you what to do. Leaving is your decision and he can’t object. Actually doing it will make you quite angry. It's a decision that will benefit you both. Plus, it seems obvious that he can’t leave his company. 

“It’s something we should discuss together before making this kind of decision,” he replies. He doesn’t turn around to look at you. He’s still in shock at what he just heard, it feels unreal to him. 

“We both know you’ll never agree to it or you’ll try to find a solution but the only reasonable solution is me finding a job in another company,” you explain while walking in his direction. 

Jungkook shakes his head. He’s convinced there’s another way but he can’t let you lose this opportunity of working in one of the best companies. He knows how happy you were to join his company, he knows it was your dream because this would be a massive opportunity for you to work with the best people in the industrie. Seeing each other can’t be a barrier to that. 

“Look at you,” you say, “you’re completely refusing it but I have to go, I have to work somewhere else if we want to give a shot at whatever we are doing. I choose you over this job.” 

Maybe it’s not the best decision you’re making because you should never put a man before your dreams. But that man ain’t any man. With Jungkook, you also speak a lot about work and together, you can help each other. Even if you start working for another company, he will give you his input in whatever you’re doing, if you ask it of course. For sure, you wouldn’t be able to tell him what project you’re working on but if you ask him what he thinks of this or that, he’ll gladly help. At the end of the day, you both did the same studies. 

“You can’t do that, you can’t choose me over your career,” he says while finally facing you. 

“But think about it,” you start saying. “If I stay, it will generate a conflict of interest for you. We will both be in an uncomfortable position, I will doubt every decision you make that involves me and you’ll also consider me when making a decision. That’s not right, neither for us nor for the other employees,” you argue. 

Jungkook has already thought about this all but he knows there will be no impact. He’s way too high in the hierarchy and you’re at the bottom. Taehyung is the one making decisions directly involving you, but still there, there’s your manager, Jimin in between you and Taehyung. In any case, Taehyung’s decisions will be made following instructions that he received from Hoseok, the CFO, and that he directly received from Jungkook. There are some people involved in between. His instructions will only be considered for the sake of the company. Nothing more, nothing less. 

“Look, there are Hoseok, Taehyung, and Jimin between us.” It seems so weird to you to hear the first names of your superiors. “My decisions are made for the sake of the company so I don’t see how it can directly affect you and only you. The three of them follow my instructions but they can adapt them. Most of the time my instructions are simply a result that I expect from a specific department but then how the result is obtained doesn’t matter to me,” he explains. 

There’s no need to be a genius to know how a decision can benefit you. 

“You’re quite close to Taehyung because he’s one of the best in his area. If he tells you that I did well, you can seize that opportunity to convince him to promote me as manager or whatever you think of. That can be an unfair treatment because you like me.” 

You wanted to say ‘because you love me’ but that seems a bit too much since you’re not exactly sure of his feelings for you. However, that’s what Jungkook wanted to hear because he still loves you. But it’s better you didn’t say it. 

“You can say whatever you want Jk but I won’t change my mind,” you say. “My decision is made.” 

Well, Jungkook is perfectly aware of it. That’s something that didn’t change about you. Once you’re convinced about something, wrong or right, nobody can change your mind. You’re way too stubborn.

“Well, then I appreciate you informing me before going to Taehyung,” he simply replies. 

There’s for sure some disappointment in his face but deep down, he knows you’re right. In the long run, the situation will be problematic one way or another. But he would have preferred that you gain some more experience in his company before leaving. It would only be beneficial for you. 

“I better be going, Jimin will probably get worried,” you say. 

Jungkook nods. Both of you proceed to get back to work without saying anything else. The rest of the day, you don’t speak or text. There’s like a thin wall of ice that appeared between you, and it’s scaring you both. But since you want to try to get back together, you’ll both pretend that it isn’t there. Almost as if you’re voluntarily closing your eyes because you don’t want to lose each other. 

Since you didn’t like the way yesterday went by, you decide to show up at his place. Before appearing unexpectedly, you made sure that Arya wasn't there. Jungkook has been making sure that you don’t randomly end up meeting Arya. You couldn’t agree more with this decision. 

“Yn?” he says with surprise when he opens the door. 

The man standing in front of you is still wearing his suit. Immediately, you understand that he’s still working. Probably something has happened at work which needs to be solved. 

“Sorry to come up out of the blue, I didn’t mean to bother you,” you start saying. “I just want to have a conversation with you, especially after what happened yesterday.” 

Jungkook nods before letting you inside. As soon as you step inside, he presses his lips against yours. This is very surprising but honestly, it feels absolutely wonderful. Feeling his lips against yours is extremely intoxicating. You’re completely addicted to him. 

“Are you okay?” you whisper against his lips. 

“I just need you, yn,” he mumbles. 

Things have been hard at work for Jungkook. Unfortunately, it has been affecting him in general. Whenever he’s alone, away from you, he wonders if indeed it’s a good idea to try again. He hates himself for thinking that way because he has always wanted to be with you. He never moved on from you. But now that he has you once more, he simply doesn’t know. He’s completely lost. 

Before you can understand, you’re in his bedroom exchanging fervent kisses. You’re both intoxicated by each other, lost in your little bubble. In a matter of seconds, you’re both naked, his head in between your legs, eating you out like a starving man. Your moans quickly echo in his bedroom, his name leaving your lips while Jungkook procures you a lot of pleasure. You have orgasms upon orgasms and it doesn’t stop him at all. It’s pleasantly overwhelming. 

Throughout the time he eats you out, he strokes his cock. Hearing you moaning and feeling your fluids on his face and tongue excite him more than he can explain. It doesn’t take him a long time before he’s hard as a rock. His mind is fully consumed by lust. All he can think of is to fuck you. 

Once he senses that he has tortured you enough, he stands up, placing himself on top of you. There’s no need to talk to understand that he’s going to penetrate you in the next few seconds. On the moment, none of you think of using protection. You’re just completely lost in your burning desire. With no surprise, he penetrates you. It causes an instantly deep moan to leave your throat. Jungkook adores seeing you underneath him in this state. You’re intoxicated by each other. 

Sloppy kisses are exchanged while he fills you up with his little monster. He takes you in every position possible, pushing both your limits. You stop counting the orgasms you have, it’s just too much but in a delicious way. You take all that he gives you until your body gives up. Your body actually starts trembling quite fast after he fills you up. 

After what seemed like an eternity, Jungkook completely explodes inside you. It’s at that precise moment that you realize that you didn’t use any protection. But you’re too lost to say or do anything about it. Your lover stands up, grabbing a tissue to clean his cock. On your end, you stand up to use his bathroom. It’s always recommended to pee right after sex. You never miss doing it even if all your fluids left your body while having intercourse. 

When you come back into the room, you find him sitting on the end of his bed. He looks absolutely devastated. You haven’t seen him that way in years. You run to his side, taking him in your arms. The second he feels your arms wrapped against him, he bursts into tears. You instantly close your eyes since it absolutely crushes you to hear him cry. 

Whilst he cries in your arms, you don’t say anything. You’re simply there for him, trying to comfort him with your simple presence. Seeing such a strong man in this state indicates that he has really reached a low point. This time you’re going to be there for him and help him. This time you’re not going to give up on him. He doesn’t deserve it. He never deserved it the way you treated him in the past. 

“I’m here,” you finally mumble while pressing a kiss on top of his head. 

His hands on top of your arms hold you tighter, almost as if he’s scared you let go of him. But you’re not going anywhere until he hasn’t calmed down. You’re probably even going to spend the night here with him. There’s no way you’re leaving him alone when he’s like this. 

“I’m so lost, yn,” he whispers. “I’m way too lost.” 

It breaks your heart to listen to him saying that. 

“There’s too much going on at Jeon Industries,” he says. “Having you quit the company is also hard because I feel like I’ve failed everywhere with it. I don’t know what to do anymore, I just want to throw it all away and just stay with Arya.” 

You kneel down to see his face. It breaks your heart even more when you see his face ravaged by tears. His weeping eyes find yours. 

“You haven’t failed anything, Jungkook,” you say in an attempt to comfort him, “you actually exceed everywhere.” 

Your thumbs clean the tears running down his cheeks. You don’t wish to see him like this, it’s way too heartbreaking. 

“Remember when you were talking about building your own company?” you ask and he nods straight away. “It was simply a dream back then but you made it happen. All by yourself. It’s even one of the biggest companies in the country. You can be proud of yourself for all that.” 

Even if you weren’t together, you felt so much pride seeing him building his empire. He accomplished more than he ever described to you. Times might sometimes be hard but that’s part of life. It would be boring if we didn't face a little challenge. In the end, it is what makes the taste of victory feel even better. 

“This is a challenging time for Jeon Industries but it’s temporary, you’ll totally overcome it because you’re Jeon Jungkook. The smartest person I’ve ever met.” 

Jungkook places his hand on top of yours. This warms his heart more than he can even express. Being around feels absolutely good. 

“And I’m simply leaving the company so I can be by your side, I’m not going anywhere,” you finish. 

He closes his eyes. His life is falling apart in front of his eyes, everything is out of control. Of his control. The only thing secure is his daughter. All the rest is simply overwhelming. Too overwhelming. He needs a break from the world. Even one from you. 

A week has passed since the crying incident at his place. You’ve been quite concerned with him but he hasn’t been talking much with you. However, for the past few days, you have given him the space that he needs. He’s not going well so you’re not going to force him to open up with you. 

Today, he has invited you to join him in a little park. Seeing that message brought a bright smile to your face because you’ve been excited to be with him. You imagined that he probably prepared a little cute date to just get his mind off work. But strangely, when you reach the park, you find him sitting on a bench, his face looking down at the grass. 

When he hears you getting close, he stands up. He doesn’t smile at all. Actually, you can’t read his face at all. It catches you off guard. This isn’t something you expected to see at all and it doesn’t sound good at all. Instantaneously, your heart starts pounding extremely fast at the same time that your hands start shaking. You’re scared of whatever he might say today. 

“Thanks for coming, yn,” he starts saying. “I truly appreciate it.” 

Jungkook doesn’t move closer, putting a clear distance between you. This man standing in front of you isn’t the man you have been hanging out with lately. This man is barely recognizable. 

“There’s no problem,” you reply.

“As I have told you, I’ve been feeling extremely lost lately,” you nod. “Everything is way too overwhelming for me and I simply don’t know what to do. But I know that having you back in my life is one of the reasons I’m feeling this way,” he explains. “I’ve always wanted you back but I never considered the consequences it would have on me. To be honest, I don’t know how to handle having you in my life again. Everything is different. I’m not the Jungkook you used to know. I used the pain you caused to build this new life. Everything I have today is because of all the suffering you put me through so how can I have you in my life with all this?” 

Tears start running down his face. This is too hard. It’s hard to realize that the person he has ever wanted in his life is the same one who is causing all this pain. The way he’s feeling right now is mainly because of you. Without you, this issue at Jeon Industries would have been solved quickly and wouldn’t have made him cry like a baby. 

“When we’re not together, when I’m not in our bubble, my mind starts wondering a lot. I question all that I have right now and wonder how my life would have been if you had never left me. The only certainty that I have is that nothing would be like this,” he pauses for a couple of seconds. “I keep overthinking everything and it’s driving me completely crazy. I’m currently not happy and this is not possible when I have a daughter to take care of. I have to take care of myself to provide her with the most wonderful life.” 

To hear all those words shatters your heart into a million pieces. 

“I would like to say that I want to date you again, I truly want to. What we have been having, I’ve been dreaming of it for ten years but it’s too much for me right now,” he continues. “We need to put an end to this right now before I simply explode and destroy everything. I don’t want to hurt you or anybody around me, especially my daughter.” 

What you feared most is happening. Jungkook is pushing you away because he’s hurting just like you did ten years ago. However, you’re the person responsible for his suffering. He’s pushing you away because you’re still causing him a lot of pain. 

“I need space and time to heal,” he finalizes. 

For a moment, you simply stare at each other. Jungkook is waiting for an answer from you but you’re not capable of saying anything. This is way too surprising for you but you need time to process every word that he just said. But this breaks you. More than words can say. 

“I’m going, yn,” he says when he notices that you’re not reacting. “Take care,” he says before leaving you. Now, you’re brokenhearted alone in the middle of a park. It seems that in the end, it wasn’t the right time for you and Jungkook.

[superblysubpar]

<- part four | part six -> | series masterlist

chapter summary: Steve and you are working late.

the song: Cinema by Harry Styles

2,236 words | please see masterlist for gen warnings / brief descriptions of injury/blood | my blog is 18+

AN: I cannot believe there’s only four chapters left to share of this! Thanks for being here and your continued support of this story 💛Also, no hate to the peaches smelling community, I love that smell just as much as Steve Harrington, just for the purposes of this fic we hate it, of course.

Hawkins, Indiana - the past

  “Yeah? Well, you’d know all about stupid, Harrington.”

  And then you pushed off, the call of your name drowned out by the wind rushing past your ears. 

  It was quick, you blinked and you were already halfway down, stomach swooping as you dropped lower and lower too fast, the gravel no longer a looming, far off thing, but almost right in front of you. Some part of you registered the shout of your name, still sounding close, which would be impossible, unless-

  His bike was next to yours, his cheeks pink as you risked a glance over and shouted, “What the hell are you-”

  Steve swore, said your name, and then you both hit gravel. Rocks and dirt kicked up and hit your bare legs like little knives slicing through your skin that made you yelp. Your handle bars shook, your grip loosening against your will and that was all it took for the destroyer to take you out. 

  Something stung, something snapped, something really, really hurt, and you were blinking up at the bright blue, cloudless Summer sky, breathing hard as hot tears started to pour out over your cheeks. 

  “St-Steve,” you hiccupped, trying to hold in the real tears that threatened to make you start sobbing and the gravel next to you crunched as he scrambled over and you gasped for a deeper breath, “I…I think I…my ankle hurts.”

  His voice was strained, heated, and tight, “I told you, look, now you’re hurt and…” he stopped though, seeing the tears on your cheeks and how your eyes went wide when they looked up at him. Bright red, and matting his hair down against his skin, a big gash on Steve’s forehead was bleeding. 

  “What?” He blinked at you.

  Your mouth fell open, gesturing to it, “Steve, you don’t feel that? Are you okay?”

  He pressed his fingers to his forehead and winced and your body filled with rage, more tears spilling out of you as you yelled. 

  “Why’d you come after me!”

  Steve blinked at your volume, his lips pulling down in a hard frown as his own voice raised. 

  “You were gonna get hurt so I-”

  “What, you had to get hurt too then?”

  Steve shook his head, looking away from you and gingerly reaching out to prop your leg up on his thigh, bloody knuckles and shredded skin on his palms as he curled his fingers around your calf. He looked up the hill to make sure someone was getting help. He laughed, looking back at you with a cold gaze. 

  “Are you seriously making this a competition, right now? While your ankle is sprained or worse and my head is bleeding? Seriously?”

  “Well, why the hell else would you come after me? You just couldn’t let me be the winner, right Harrington? Couldn’t let the stupid girl show you up in front of all your friends, huh?”

  Steve blinked at you, gaze roaming over your face before he shook his head. 

  “You’re unbelievable, you know that?”

  Hawkins, Indiana - Friday

  Eddie sits across from you in silence, brown eyes blinking rapidly.

  “How are we doing over here?” The waitress asks, refilling your coffee mugs, eying the silent boy.

  “Oh we’re fine. He’s just processing something, can I get a slice of the lemon pie?”

  “Su-“

  “You - can you have what?” Eddie asks, shocked. He waves his hands in the air, his head shakes from side to side, dark brown waves whipping over his face as he loudly declares with a broad gesture of his hands, “Nope. No. You did not share a milkshake with Steve Harrington!”

  “Wanna say it a little louder, I think there’s a few people over in Chicago who only got ever other word!” You hiss at him, leaning forward.

  Eddie laughs, scoffs, into his coffee mug but sets it down before he can even take a sip. He narrows his eyes at you and leans on his folded arms on the table. “Sweetheart, I was sort of joking last night. I thought this would be funny, maybe you’d come around to seeing he’s not as much of an asshole as you’ve convinced yourself he is, but overall, I was gonna sit back and enjoy the show of you two going at it like you always do. You weren’t supposed to fall in love with the guy and make googly eyes and play footsie at the diner!”

  “First of all,” you growl, but then smile as the waitress drops off the pie. You wait till she’s out of ear shot to continue, “The only reason I was at this diner, with Steve, was because of you-“

  “Details,” he waves you off, sipping his coffee with an eye roll.

  “-And I’m not in love with him. I…” you trail off, fork stabbing the pie as you force out, “I hate him.”

  “Okay,” Eddie nods, pursing his lips and squinting his eyes, sarcasm dripping from the word. 

  “I do!” You shout, then glance around and lower your voice. “I do. I hate him. I hate how he flirts with anything that giggles and smells like peaches. I hate how he drums on the counter when he has a song stuck in his head and whistles while he restocks the shelves. I hate how he always manages to have some sort of food on his chin or cheek or lips. I hate that he’s a cocky,” you cut a huge chunk of the pie with the side of your fork as you emphasize, “Stubborn,” you stab the bite, “Winning obsessed, thinks he’s never wrong, jerk.”

  Your eyes close around the bite of the pie, tart lemon and sweet crust on your tongue hard to swallow because he’s right.

  It’s good.

  And as the sour and sweet dessert rolls over your tastebuds, you know you don’t hate him. You don’t hate how he flirts, you hate that it’s with anyone but you. You don’t hate that he drums or whistles, you hate that you don’t always know the song, and it has you wondering what he listens to - or worse, you do know the song, and of course you like it. You hate that when he gets food on his face, you just want to lick it off. You hate that because he’s just as stubborn and winning obsessed as you, you always have someone to challenge you - to make you try harder, do better. 

  Your eyes open to find Eddie staring at you with raised eyebrows and folded hands.

  “How’s that taste of reality pie going over?”

  You groan, hands over your eyes as you speak softly, “I don’t want to like him, Eddie. I don’t. I can’t.”

  “You do,” Eddie corrects just as softly. He pulls at one of your hands, tugging it off of your face so he can look you in the eyes as he asks, “Why can’t you like him? A real reason this time.”

  Your fork picks at the pie crust, lip worried between your teeth as you think of all the reasons you don’t like Steve.

  There aren’t many - not real reasons at least. 

  Eddie sighs, “Look,” he waves his hands in front of him, “I’m not saying you’ve created this personal vendetta against a guy who was twelve and didn’t want to lose face in front of his friends, but,” he leans forward and shrugs, “Steve Harrington is not a twelve year old idiot anymore. And what’s he actually done that’s been so bad?”

  He lets his words sink in and he taps the table after a minute, joking, “Just don’t sleep with the guy till Sunday, for me, please?”

  But that’s it, isn’t it? 

  As Eddie heads over to the counter to pay, the reminder of the bet makes the lemon in your stomach sour, any sweetness overpowered.  

  Maybe it was all just a game to Steve still. Maybe your walls had been genuinely crumbling, but maybe that was just because Steve Harrington had expert precision on delivering his blows to it. 

  You haven’t looked him in the eye the entire shift. 

  It was bad enough, that when you got dropped off by Eddie, you hopped out of his van wearing a cherry red sundress and only gave a short smile to him when he said hi. A ‘fine’ when he asked how your head was. 

  You’d nodded as you slipped the green vest over your dress, intently listening while Robin filled you in on everything the pair accomplished all morning. 

  He worked harder than he has ever for Keith, so you and him wouldn’t have much to do other than deal with the late night shipment arriving. 

  But you found things to do. 

  The front window displays were cleaned, windows thoroughly scrubbed, then reset. The dollar rental bin reorganized, new movies added to fill the gaps. You dusted shelves, you filed paperwork that had already been filed. And every time he tried to ask you a question, to talk, you gave bare minimum answers, keeping your eyes off of him.

  Maybe, last night, you were only wearing his sweatshirt because it was the first thing you saw, a coincidence. Maybe, you were awake when he kissed your cheek, and you really didn’t like it. Maybe…

  Maybe he’s read this entire week completely wrong. 

  Maybe you’re really never going to give him a chance. 

  He swallows, restocking candy, fingers lingering on the M&M’s, desperate for comfort food, to over analyze and annoy Robin about this all night and make her tell him it’s fine. Plenty of fish in the sea. Just keep being yourself. 

  Steve grabs the phone and looks over at you walking down the horror aisle, checking things on a clipboard he’s already checked. 

  “Hey,” he calls out.

  You ignore him.

  He huffs as he leans onto the counter, cradling the phone between his shoulder and ear, watching you as he loudly says, “Yeah, hi, this is Steve Harrington. I’m calling in regards to my manager, maybe you know her?”

  You look up at him for the first time the entire shift, frowning. He keeps going.

  “Yeah, she seems to not have come into work today? This girl who won’t look me in the eyes and barely speaks to me has replaced her and I’d do anything to get the real her back, even if she’s yelling at me about her precious Red Vines.”

  You roll your eyes and walk past the counter, into the back room. 

  Steve frowns at the open door, slamming the phone down as he does. He stomps into the semi-office-semi-break room to find you starting to run the coffee pot through a cleaning cycle.

  “That’s it!” He stands with his hands on his hips as your shoulders jump. “What did I do this time?”

  “What?” You spin to face him, crossing your arms over your dress, which only serves to torture him with the way it emphasizes the low cut of it.  

  “What do you mean what? You know what I’m talking about! You won’t look me in the eye, you won’t talk to me! Baby, what could I have possibly done in the time you were sleeping or before you got here to upset you?”

  “I-“

  Steve steps closer to you, running a hand through his hair, before talking loudly with his hand hitting his palm to emphasize each point, “I worked my ass off all morning to impress you, like an idiot! I-I thought, last night…” He waves his hands around, shaking the thought away as he continues to get closer, to only speak louder, “I deserve the cold shoulder most days, I get it, you hate me, for whatever reason, but after last night, I’d like to think that-“

  “What you deserve, is nothing,” you scoff, taking your own step closer, skin too warm in the badly ventilated back room, skin already sticky with sweat. 

  “Excuse me?” He asks, incredulous. 

  It’s too hot back here. Your chest heaves, he watches a bead of sweat travel down your throat. 

  “You don’t deserve anything just because you did your job, congratulations by the way, on being a normal, functioning human being,” you add sarcastically before continuing, “And you especially don’t deserve anything because you were a little worried about me last night, Harrington!”

  “A little? A little?! Honey, I’ve never been more scared in my life!” He shouts, hands gesturing to your forehead while you have the nerve to scowl harder at his words.

  “Oh, I’m sure, Steve, that a cut to my forehead is the most scared you’ve ever been. It has nothing to do with the big three hundred dollar question hanging in the air does it?!”

  Your bodies are close together, both of you glaring at each other as your voices only get louder. There’s a buzz in the room, a hum, like your bodies are charged, ready to strike. 

  “The bet?! That’s what you’re upset about? When are you going to get it in your stubborn-“

  “I’m not stubborn! You’re stubborn!” 

  Steve scoffs, eyes looking at your lips as the tips of his shoes touch yours, “Seriously? You’re unbelievable, I…I…” 

  “I hate you!” You shove at his chest, blinking rapidly at how close his nose is to yours. 

  He yells, not that angry, “I despise you!”

  “I detes-“

  His lips collide with yours, swallowing the words you don’t really mean. 

  Steve Harrington is kissing you.

  And you’re kissing him back. 

BICFTF Taglist: Thank you for your support 🥰

@ash5monster01 @madaboutjoe @foreverinwanderlust @the-fairy-anon @scarletwitchgf

@curlsincriminology @siriuslysmoking @redbarn1995 @starry--sarah @starksbabie

@taccobelle @angst-lasagna @blckburd @crownofdecit @torntaltos

@sanniegirl1214 @yourmommilf

[thisismeracing]

Super shy | MS47

SOCIAL MEDIA AU

― Pairing: Mick Schumacher x plus size!reader (she/her) ― Warnings: mentions of food, shy!reader, and tooth-rotting fluff. ― Summary: The one where your boyfriend is your biggest fan to the point of turning his account into a fan account or something of the sort. Or, Mick and Yn's relationship through the years. ― A/n: none of the pictures used are mine, they are all from Pinterest and other apps, but the work is and I do not allow it to be published on a different platform. I would appreciate it if those things could be taken into consideration 💛

✷ my masterlist | my taglist | patreon masterlist ✷ you can support my writing by reblogging, leaving a comment(don’t forget to follow me if you like the piece), or buying me a coffee

2020

ynusername

liked by ginaschumacher, jackdoohan, and others

ynusername what a beautiful season! super proud of my blondie :)

view all comments

mickschumacher thank you for being by my side through it all! I love you, pretty ❤️

user2 Yn you're amazing, but coffee with ice and milk is a crime!

collegefriend congrats, mick, the whole class was rooting for you!! 🥳

⤷ collegefriend2 the whole class: our friend group that happens to have seven people in it lol

jackdoohan send me the pics you took 🙏🏻🙏🏻

mickschumacher

liked by maxverstappen1, charles_leclerc, and others

mickschumacher Yes, we decided to adopt! Meet Angie Yln-Schumacher 🐶❤️

view all comments

jackdoohan omg you two look like a fifty years old couple sometimes 🥸

⤷ mickschumacher that sounds so single of you, I might have to ignore 🤨

ginaschumacher omg bring her to the ranch asap!!!!!! (also, you look perfect on this set, yn!!! ❤️❤️❤️)

⤷ ynusername love you, G 💖

user05 can Yn please share her skin care routine with us? home girl is glowing!!!

ynsfriend the shirt omg hahahaha I love you guys sm

username1 Angie is so cute!!

ynusername 🩷🩷🩷

2021

ynusername

liked by estebanocon, ginaschumacher, and others

ynusername went vroom vroom this weekend 💙

view all comments

user03 I am so ready for the paddock pics aaaa

mickschumacher love you, pretty!

⤷ ynusername love you more, blondie <3

oconzinho31 omg so this is his gf?? She’s stunning!!!!

mickschumacher

liked by estebanocon, lewishamilton, and others

mickschumacher had a great week ❤️

view all comments

estebanocon it was nice catching up with you guys

⤷ ferrarifanatic he says as if they weren't together every weekend lol

⤷ schumashoes nah but they were gossiping I'm sure, during the weekend the focus is racing

ynusername 💞💞

lancestroll 🥂🥂

charlesleclown I wanted to be Yn sm. Can you imagine being this pretty and also dating Mick Schumacher?!

2022

ynusername

liked by franciscac.gomes, lilymhe, and others

ynusername 💛 a little throwback time to Angie a year ago

view all comments

ginaschumacher omg I'm so used to seeing Angie that I didn't notice she lost her puppy face

lilymhe 🤍🤍🤍

1directionpaddock all of her dumps are so aesthetic, I'm in love

yukilover Yn you should show your face more, you're so pretty 💘

mickschumacher my princess and my queen ❤️

⤷ ynusername yeah, Angie is our little queen 💗

⤷ mickschumacher you're my queen, silly 😜

mickschumacher

liked by sebastianvettel, carlossainz55, and others

mickschumacher week's dump

view all comments

lancestroll where am I? 🤨

⤷ estebanocon you were gossiping with Yn and Albon

⤷ ynusername as if you weren't gossiping in the last pic huh

⤷ strollingaround LMAO get them, queen!

hamiltontouch can someone make a fan account for Yn clothes? I need all of her sets, they're too perfect!!

lewishamilton ❤️❤️

rbrvettel can we keep seb forever please? :(

ynusername

liked by georgerussell63, lilymhe, and others

ynusername It's the most beautiful time of the year 💚❤️🤍

view all comments

ginaschumacher one more xmas together 🥰

mercmick I WANNA LIVE ON THIS DUMP!

jackdoohan 💚

mickschumacher every time is the most beautiful time of the year as long as I'm with you

⤷ ynusername you're so cheesy

⤷ mickschumacher just for you 😚

monzasainz I wanna cry they're so cute

2023

mickschumacher

liked by lancestroll, danielricciardo, and others

mickschumacher month dump: sza concert, we adopted a sister for Angie, and we're moving to a bigger place 🤍

view all comments

estebanocon now you're a father of two

interlagoshamilton Mick account is actually a fan account for Yn I said what I said 🏃🏾‍♀️🏃🏾‍♀️🏃🏾‍♀️

⤷ tauritsunoda and you’re right, bestie!

happyricciardo I wanna be loved the way Yn is, get flowers, and praises, and have a man obsessed with me the way Mick is with her *crying in single*

hammert1m3 THEY'RE MOVING TO A BIGGER PLACE CUZ NOW THEY HAVE TWO DOGS, AND DKGJDKHJD OMG IM SO HAPPY BUT IM CRYING

ynusername I love you forever, blondie 💗 here to many more years together

⤷ mickschumacher I love you the most, Schatzi

lilymhe 🤎🤎 ily guys!

― ⋆🪩 VOICEMAIL: Hi, besties! I hope you guys like this piece! I wanted to write something fluffly, but didn’t have the biggest idea so I went with just fluff, that’s all there is to the piece, but I hope you like it! 🤍 make sure to let me know your thoughts by reblogging and leaving me an ask!

taglist: @sachaa-ff @ferrariloverr @mickslover @fdl305 @lunnnix @saintslewis @mishaandthebrits @iloveyou3000morgan @smiithys @crimeshowjunkie @carojasmin2204 @chaoticevilbakugo @f1kota @wondergirl101ks @shhhchriss @leclercsluv @karmabyfernando @baby-is-crying @crashingwavesofeuphoria @v1naco @cixrosie @elliegrey2803 @he6rtshaker @therealcap @mehrmonga @thatgibbsygirl @the-depressed-fellow @darleneslane @skepvids @goldenalbon @nichmeddar @buckybarnessweetheart @nzygftoji @fastcarsandshit @scopeiguess @jamie2305 @balekanemohafe @callsign-scully @schumacheer @dearxcherry @princewis

✷ check here my main masterlist | patreon masterlist and my taglist  if you wanna be tagged on my pieces

©thisismeracing do not copy, steal, or translate my work. do not repost on a different media platform.

[kingconia]

i love your works so much 💕💕 u write the characters so well! i was wondering if you could do the housewardens + a mc who listens to heavy rock and metal? or, alternatively, a mc who plays guitar. thank you <3

A/N: Ah, I am very thankful for these words. I decided to mix these two idea for different characters. I hope it is alright.

HOUSEWARDENS WITH MC, WHO IS INTERESTED IN HEAVY MUSIC

Riddle Rosehearts. ❤️

— I have a headcanon that Riddle rarely listens to music, and if he does, it is something classical and organic. Perhaps, lo-fi for studies purposes, too, but rarely;

— When you ask about putting some of your favourite songs for the evening, Riddle has no arguments against it. You are such a lovely and delightful person, surely, you music is just as sweet as–

— Oh, dear. Congratulations, you scared him with the noises of hell, blasting through dynamics...

— Respectfully, he hates your music preferences. And there is no way it will change. However, he tries to be nice about it...

•

”You are looking as if you are having a heart attack,” you comment absentmindedly, putting song on the pause. ”Riddle, I told you, that you shouldn't make yourself listen to it, if—”

”I am fine! I am fine, really,” he quickly reassures you, plastering a nervous smile on his face. ”Please, put it back. I... I really enjoyed this last part, where... Uhm... He screamed.”

You sigh.

Riddle was impossible to deal with.

Leona Kingscholar. 💛

— When you tell Leona that you make your own music, he thinks you play something careful or pop-like. He doesn't like this type of music, but obviously he can endure a little torment for you;

— However as you take a guitar in your hands, Leona is genuinely shocked. Very pleasantly shocked!

— I headcanon Leona listening to heavy rock, too, so, I think that he absolutely loves what you do. He is your fan number one now, and he brags about you to everyone.

— If you also sing, he will use your voice as a lullaby material. ”Y/n, play ’Numb’ by Linkin Park, I want to sleep.”

•

”Guess what?” You ask as you are standing behind sitting Leona, resting elbows on his shoulders.

”Hm? What is it?”

”Headmaster asked me to sing for the Halloween concert,” you smirk proudly.

As emerald eyes lit up slightly—a very rare sight to witness—Leona folds arms on his chest, clearly boasting:

”Of course, he did,” turning his head to your side, he lands a kiss on your cheek. ”That's my star right there!”

You huff, but your cheeks are instantly flushed from his compliment. Why he has to be so embarrassing?

Azul Ashengrotto. 🩵

— I am sorry, but as soon as he finds out about you, being a musician, he will not even care about what type of music it is. From now, you are playing in the Monster Lounge in all your free times—

— But jokes aside, Azul instantly supports you. He doesn't really have an established opinion about heavy metal. Music is music, isn't it?

— Though, if you ask me, I don't think Azul is a big fan of this genre in general. But he is your fan, so it doesn't really matter;

— He will definitely suggest to become your personal manager, because, of course, he would.

•

”So?” You let out a tired, a little rushed breath, looking at your boyfriend expectantly. ”Was it good? Was it bad? Monster Lounge worthy, or?”

There is a strange dreamy smile on Azul's face, with his teeth slightly baring as he rushes to your side:

”My dear, it was an absolute masterpiece. It is not Monster Lounge worthy. It is a world worthy.’

”Azul,” you groan, rolling your eyes tiredly. ”Please, don't lie to me. It is just some silly songs.”

Ignoring your remark, he presses his cheek to yours, announcing with a strange triumph in his voice.

”And that how legends are made.”

You fight an urge to smack him with a guitar. What an idiot.

Kalim Al-Asim. 🧡

— I think Kalim likes hyperpop the most, but overall, he listens everything. So, don't be afraid, he is definitely not a one to judge or say something against your tastes;

— When you crash in his place to hang out, and put your playlist, he is absolutely delighted! He likes every song you show him, and he makes sure to add it on his favourites, too;

— Kalim might or might not ask you for you account in Magicfy, so you both could constantly see what you are listening to, and exchange songs you like;

— And he makes a special playlist for you, with songs he thinks you might like, and never heard before.

•

”Did you like it?” Kalim asks, shifting from one leg to another, almost nervously. ”A few of them were added from Jamil's playlist, but I hadn't seen anything similar in your Magicfy, so—”

”Kali-im,” you are practically throwing yourself on him, wrapping arms around his neck tightly. ”Kalim, you are the best.”

You spent your last night listening through playlist he made—consisting of forty five songs!—and you can't help but feel grateful. Kalim chose every single song so carefully, just to please you.

”I am glad you like it!”

And, surely, everyone knows that the path to someone's heart lays through new and unexplored music!

Vil Schoenheit. 💜

— Your confession that you make music bring a lot of satisfaction to him. He thinks, it is important to have some similar interests, and he loves the idea both of you being invested in this type of art;

— However, Vil had never expected that you are creating rock music. It is not something he listens to, but, he supports your interest nevertheless;

— You are always amazing in his eyes, but if Vil spots some mistake in your work, or just suggestion how to improve your lyrics, he will point it out;

— Just like Azul, invested in making you a star. Buys you expensive technics, connects you with different famous people, who can teach you something useful, and, accidentally, mentions you in front of his colleagues... Oh, he knows what he is doing.

•

”I am so nervous,” you mumble, fixing your hair for the fifth time in a row. ”This concert place is huge. Why it is so huge?”

”Calm down,” Vil sighs, slightly smacking your hands away. ”And keep your hands of your face and hair, I worked too long on them for you ruining it so easily.”

You smile apologetically.

”Don't worry, my twinkle star. The stage is yours—and you got it,” he kisses you on the back of your hand reassuringly, well-aware of how hard it is; to preform for the first time. ”Now go. And when you return, I will make sure to reward you thoroughly.”

As your cheeks heat up, you can't think of anything but a mystery reward you were promised to... Well, Vil definitely knows how to fight with anxiety.

Idia Shroud. 💙

— Idia literally doesn't care what music is playing. He puts random playlists on the background, when he is playing games most of the time. He is not even familiar with the names of songs or musical bands;

— When you ask if you can put your music, Idia literally just shrugs;

— Have zero reaction on your playlist. Might or might not nod occasionally in the beat of song, but that's it;

— But, if his head hurts, he will ask to turn it down. His migraines can't tolerate this kind of loudness, sorry.

•

”Can I put my playlist?” You ask quietly, plopping on the sofa as you enter the room.

”Not today,” Idia sighs, sitting next to you slowly. ”My head hurts, and if I wanted to hear man screaming in this state, I would simply go to the housewarden meeting.”

You chuckle softly, reaching to pat his hair. As your fingers sink in his unruly locks, he mumbles something incoherent, nuzzling in your touch instantly.

”Rest then, darling,” you scratch the skin of his head gently. ”I am here.”

”Thank you...”

Malleus Draconia. 💚

— Malleus is so excited that you asked him to check your music out, that he doesn't even care about such details as this;

— He has a really superficial knowledge about genres and stuff, but since Lilia plays in the group in his free-time, and it is also the heavy stuff, Malleus is not that ignorant;

— But, truth to be told, he would love your songs anyway. It is you, who makes this songs special, not the other way around;

— Just as Leona, he is your most loyal fan, bragging about you everywhere. He likes to sit on your lap, while you work on lyrics and notes, too.

•

”Had you been here for a long time?” You ask with unhidden surprise in your voice.

Malleus is standing in the doorway, leaning on the door frame with his shoulder, arms folded on his chest. He smiles widely as you acknowledge him, stars in eyes becoming even brighter than before.

”It doesn't matter. The image of you working on what you love, these fingers fumbling in strings, fascinates me completely. The time passes without a notice.”

You huff, already being used to this kind of compliments from him.

”Then come and sit with me,” you offer, patting the place next to you. ”I don't mind having you here, after all.”

And that what makes him beam openly.

What a level of trust it is!

[inkblottzz]

Not a traditional request, but I'm curious to see how your art is formed and what your process is. It's so cool that your art is similar to comyet's!! I always wondered what other people in their newer artstyle would look like but they only ever drew Ink. I guess now I have a chance :D

Drink water and i hope you have a good day!!!

this is a really interesting request!! thank you for asking, actually! i like questions like these :-D

i'll start by explaining my personal art process—how i, 12-year-old me started out, and then explain how i got where i am with my art today! buckle up, because this will probably be a lengthy post :-)

The Progression of my Art

my first ever art posted online was at the beginning of 2020, when quarantine first hit. i had always had a knack for art; doodling in class, making OCs, etcetc. however, when i heard about undertale through a friend, that's when i really started to take things serious.

i did all the things kids do when they first find out about undertale—i watched countless comic dubs, animation memes, looked up fanart, etc. i first started my real art journey when i began making fanart for undertale and the AUs. this is why undertale is so special to me, and why i have loved it for so long! it has fueled my creativity for almost five years now.

this is the first fanart i ever had done. i posted it on amino sometime in may.

i was SO so proud of this piece. i showed it to my friends & family, and then decided to show people online! this was my first big milestone as an artist.

as time went on, i improved more and more, creating countless UT AU artworks in my spare time. and it was all because of the people who were kind and supportive of my art! the UTAU amino will always hold a special place in my heart, because of the positive experience i had. the positive feedback i got is what drove me to really want to start improving my skills and become a better artist like the ones i looked up to 💛 this is why it's so important to be kind to beginners. even if their art isn't the best at first, you bet your asses it'll be in the next few years!!

SO! i drew and improved, really just trying to find my own style that i liked. i had always loved ink sans, and that prompted me to look into his creator's artwork around late 2022-early 2023. i followed her instagram, and at first, just admired her work from afar.

then, i tried out replicating her style! this is the first piece i ever drew inspired by mye! i made this last fall, in 2023.

after that, i tried to find my own style some more, leaving the lineless style behind. but, in may of this year—2024—myebi decided to hold a DTIYs, and that's when i decided to replicate her style!

i know, i know, kinda defeats the whole "draw this in your own style" thing... but i had been wanting to try and replicate their style for quite some time, and i saw this as a perfect opportunity to try it out!

this is myebi's OC, aheran, that i drew for the contest !! it isn't exactly like her style, obviously, since i didn't want it to be too similar and weird mye out. however, i did replicate the lineless style, the grain textures, and the shading style as best i could. i also played around with shape language.

this piece was SO fun to do, and i did end up earning an honorable mention!

this was also my first post on instagram. after this, i started to draw all my art in a style inspired off mye's!

How do I draw in Comyet/Myebi's style?

here is where i'll be answering your question: what does my process look like when I'm replicating myebi's style?

i'll try my best to break it down into seperate steps that i usually take!

1. References!

References, references, references! References are the most important thing you need when trying to replicate something specific. I am currently at a point in my style where I do not usually need references, but you bet I used them big time when I first began to replicate mye's style!

Personally, I believe her instagram (@mye_bi) is the best place to get recent refs of her style! It's the social they post most often on. For Undertale specific references, I gathered them from her Tumblr (@/comyet) because her insta doesn't have Undertale related art. You may have to scroll a bit, but you'll find it on her blog!

I also have some niche references from other online sources, but I had to dig quite a bit for them. You don't need to be that thorough lmao

all art by myebi/comyet!

2. Sketching

After I gather references, I start with a sketch! Really, it's just taking a bunch of references and finding things you like/need to replicate in your piece. If there isn't a reference for something you are trying to draw, then the best you can do is guess! I have to make guesses on how Myebi would draw something all the time, because I draw a wide range of different characters. It's all about experimenting and doing your best!

sketch by me, ink reference by @/comyet, error reference by @/loverofpiggies

3. Coloring over the sketch

After I finish the sketch, I go straight over it with all my base colors! I typically do everything on seperate layers, which procreate... hates. I use a lot of layers.

And, to finish off, I really just add details! Lines, textures, shading, etc. I can't quite explain how I do it—I just go off Myebi's style!

Finding the right brushes

I have spent a long time trying to find brushes that best replicate Myebi's style, and the one I linked below is the best I've been able to find! It's the pack I use right now.

I use Weak Pencil 3 for any lineart I do, I use Fine Pencil 2 for color blocking, and Weak Pencil 4 for the grainy textures/shading :-)

The pack does cost a bit of money, but unfortunately, I haven't been able to find a free brush pack that gets the job done quite the same!

and that's all there is to it! i hope this answers your question and gives you some insight on how i make my art :-D

DISCLAIMER: i am not attempting to be a "myebi 2.0" or anything like that. i simply really enjoy how their style looks, and i enjoy drawing in a similar style! i mean absolutely NO ill intent towards mye—she is my biggest inspiration, and i will always have the most amount of respect and admiration for them and her work. 💛

[timetodecidedjo]

The Poolverine Wedding Fic is here ❤️💛

Huge thank you to @avenging-captain for being my beta reader, and just genuinely being so sweet and supportive of my work!

It’s also posted over on my AO3 under I Never Loved A Man (The Way I Love You) by xuaerduobb if you wanna leave some love 🥺

I Never Loved A Man (The Way I Love You)

The air was crisp and filled with the earthy scent of fallen leaves. The sunlight, a vibrant golden amber color, was preparing to set on the day and transition into the evening. Logan felt the cool chill of the wind down his adamantium grafted spine and made a joke in his head about getting cold feet.

It was the evening of his wedding, and minute by minute, it was getting closer and closer to ceremony time. Most of their guests had already arrived and were seated in their mismatched chairs on each side of the aisle, waiting with excitement and anticipation for the happy couple. Everyone looked so nice and dressed up for the occasion, clad in scarves and warm coats to combat the chill of the October air. Logan had decided he wanted to be in full black for the wedding, black suit, black shirt, black tie. His blushing “spouse to be” always said he looked so good in dark colors, minus his iconic yellow suit.

The rolling hills of upstate New York made for such a breathtaking backdrop that Logan couldn’t help but to keep thanking Vanessa over and over for the help finding the perfect venue. Wade had said on so many occasions that it didn’t matter to him where they had the wedding, that he would’ve married Logan Howlett right there in their crummy apartment. Logan knew that he wasn’t kidding, but also knew that Wade deserved to have the perfect day he had always dreamed of.

“Logan, I have the rings, do you have your vows?” Laura asked, pulling Logan back into the present. He nodded and pulled out a folded up piece of paper from his jacket pocket, waving it in front of her. Laura was wearing a floor length black satin dress, gold jewelry and a pair of short heeled nude shoes. Her long hair was pulled back into a messy bun, with a few pieces of hair framing her face. She had a simple makeup look for the day to celebrate her TWO dads.

“You look beautiful, sweetheart,” Logan beamed as he took his daughter’s hand into his own.

She smiled and pulled him into a loving hug, so proud to be a part of their day. She pulled back when Vanessa tapped on her shoulder to alert her that it was almost time, and that everyone needed to get into their positions. Laura gave her father a reassuring smile and followed Vanessa back to the barn on the other side of the lawn where Wade and the rest of the wedding party were waiting.

Logan walked up the aisle to stand at the front of their entire family, smiling and waving at the guests that were there. The sight was so surreal. Never in his 200 years of living did he think that this would be his life, that he would get to experience falling in love and getting married to the person of his dreams.

Wade had asked Colossus to be the officiant for the wedding, and he was there waiting for them at the end of the aisle. Logan reached out to shake the steel man’s cold hand as a thank you again for agreeing to be a part of their special day.

“It is no problem, Logan,” the man made of organic steel replied as he shuffled through the book he needed to read from. “I am very happy for you and Wade.”

Just then, the hired DJ began playing the orchestral music that the bridal party was to walk down the aisle to. Wade had picked a classical version of pov by Ariana Grande, and though Logan was pretty sure he had never heard the song before, he had to admit that it was just as beautiful as the evening had turned out to be. First to come out was Yukio and Ellie, both dressed in similar black dresses to Laura’s. Their floral bouquets were decorated with sunflowers and red roses, a nod to Wade and Logan’s suits.They both had big smiles on their faces as they walked down the aisle to end at their respective spots, Yukio on Wade’s side and Ellie on Logan’s.

Then it was Vanessa and Laura’s turn as the maid of honor and best woman. Vanessa’s long black hair spilled over her shoulder and onto her back, her pale skin contrasting from the black dress she had on. They walked together with their arms linked until they had to separate, Laura standing by her father’s side, and Vanessa waiting for Wade. She looked over at Logan and mouthed, “He can’t wait to see you.”

Next, arguably more the star of the evening than Wade was, Mary Puppins pranced her way down the aisle with a basket of red and yellow flower petals hooked to her back. She ran straight to Logan and hopped up into his arms allowing all of the petals to finally fall out of the basket and onto the ground. She gave Logan quite the stinky kiss before he put her back down where she sat at his feet, like she could finally relax.

At long last, it was time. Logan was about to watch the love of his life walk down the aisle, dressed in his best suit, looking as handsome as ever, and when they’d walk back down said aisle, they’d be husbands. There was a mix of gentle, swirling energy inside of Logan’s abdomen, like his stomach had been doing flips. Before even seeing him, Wade gave him butterflies.

The barn doors opened completely this time, revealing Logan’s future husband and mother in law. Althea, who had been like Wade’s mother figure over the last 10+ years, shuffled her way down the rocky aisle, arguably Wade moreso escorting her. Though she was blind, there had been no one else Wade would’ve wanted to walk with on this special day. It was funny really, because it was kinda like a metaphor, right? Wade, blindly finding his way to the person who would be his soulmate to the altar, the aisle being the time it took for them to get to this day. The writer is hoping that makes sense…

When their eyes met, everyone else faded away, and it was just the two of them. Time had immediately slowed down. The noise, the people, the nerves… it all became a blur as Logan’s full attention shifted to Wade. He could feel his eyes soften and his vision become blurry as they filled with tears. Happy tears. Wade helped Althea to her seat and made his way to the spot next to Logan’s, where he wanted to be for the rest of their lives.

“Hey, Honey Badger,” the merc smiled, looking so incredibly handsome in his all black suit to match. “Or should I say Mr. Logan Howlett-Wilson.”

“Not just yet,” the Wolverine teased, taking his fiance’s hand into his own and kissing it. “I have some things to say to you first.”

They both turned their heads to face Colossus, but stayed in place, hands still intertwined. Wade’s hands were so cold. They always were. Logan made a mental note to send someone for gloves once the ceremony was over.

“Friends and family,” Colossus began, reading from the book in his hands. “We are gathered here today to celebrate the love between these two men, Wade Wilson and Logan Howlett. They are two of my closest friends, and I am so appreciative of their friendship. I have known Wade much longer than I’ve known this Logan, but now I don’t think I could ever know them separately ever again.”

“That’s right,” Wade grinned, still gripping onto Logan’s calloused hands tightly. “I’m not letting you go. Ever.”

Logan shook his head, but couldn’t help but feel a smile creep up onto his face. His cheeks hurt like hell from all the smiling, but it was a good hurt. One of the best hurts he’d felt in a long time.

“It is now time to exchange the vows. Who would like to go first?”

Before Logan could even say Wade, the merc with the mouth was already pulling out the sloppily written notes out of his pocket with one free hand.

“To my Honey Badger, my sweet boy, my Logan:

You know, they say don’t meet your heroes… that most of the time, these idealized versions of people will only set us up for disappointment. People have flaws, imperfections, make mistakes, and sometimes make choices that aren’t always the best. But meeting you, Logan, and getting the chance to fall head over heels, slit my own throat in love with you, has proven all that to be wrong. I did have a glamorized idea of you in my head, and you’ve exceeded it in every way possible. I know that it’s hard for you to see the things that I see in you, but I think I always knew deep down that you were and still are the best Wolverine. You’re the best Logan. Especially for me. I wanna fight with you. I wanna hold you when you’re feeling anxious. I wanna make you breakfast in bed on the weekends, even though I’m always burning the eggs. I wanna make sure you know how loved you are. Most importantly, I wanna make everyone in our apartment building uncomfortable when we’re taking a trip to pound town.”

“You do that already!” Althea called out from her seat in the front row. “The landlord gets at least 10 complaints every week. I know. I’m 7 of them.”

Everyone burst into nervous laughter, except for Althea and Ellie. It wasn’t funny.

Wade looked back down at his vows, and continued on with reciting them, this time not reading from the paper, but looking into Logan’s tired eyes.

“I call you by so many names: Wolvie, Honey Badger, Peanut, Angel Baby, Loverboy, Sweet Cheeks, the list goes on. But you’re also: my protector, my teammate, my best friend, my soulmate. I love you with every cancerous fiber of my being and I’m so excited to spend the rest of eternity with you.”

The emotions that Logan was feeling in that moment, all of them, hit him like a ton of bricks. He was never one to cry or show any emotions really. Other than anger. For so long, it was just anger. But from the moment they had met, Wade was one of the only ones who could ever break down his walls, brick by brick. No matter how hard he tried to hide it, he just couldn’t anymore. One single tear finally fell from his eye and rolled down his cheek. The merc released his grip on Logan’s hand in order to use his thumb to wipe away the wetness. Logan leaned into the touch and smiled softly before pressing a quick kiss onto Wade’s palm.

“Sorry I made you cry, Wolvie,” Wade apologized as he took his hand back and brought it back to Logan’s.

“Wait till you hear his,” Laura whispered with a small smile.

The mutant pulled out his written vows from his jacket pocket and opened them up slowly. This was hard for him. Being vulnerable like this in front of so many people… it was like knocking the wind out of his chest. He felt paralyzed, frozen there in his spot at the altar. Laura pressed a supportive hand to his back, quietly giving him the strength that he needed to say what he needed to say.

“Wade, that day in the bar when you found me drunk, wallowing in my self hatred and filled with so much anger… you literally showed up out of the blue and dragged me back to reality. You reminded me of who I am, who I was always meant to be. You continue to make me a better man every single day, teaching me patience and taking me out of my comfort zone. Wade, you keep me focused on the present and more importantly, our future… and you never make me feel bad about my past. You never stop making me laugh. Even when you’re being the most annoying person on the planet, you’re still making me laugh. You’re the funniest, sweetest, most thoughtful person I’ve ever known. You’re also a bit of a fuckin’ lunatic, but that’s just part of the Wade Wilson charm.”

Again, another laugh from the crowd, even Wade joining in. His eyes were just as glossy as Logan’s were before.

“You do these little things to show me how much you care; things that most people don’t ever see. In the middle of the night when I’m having a bad dream, you help me to wake up and realize that it was nothing but a nightmare. You’re always bringing me back little trinkets from places you travel to for work, and I still have every single one. When we order pizza on the weekends and they put mushrooms on it even though I always tell them not to, you pick them off for me before I ever notice that they’re there. You brought the daughter I never knew I needed into my life, and you love her as much as I do.”

Logan took a small breath so that he could finish his vows, his stomach in knots from all of the emotions running rampant.

“You’re the anchor being of my universe, and I’m so grateful that you made an educated wish two years ago. Our love transcends time and space. It’s a love I never knew I was capable of. It’s a love I never thought I’d ever get to experience. I love you, Wade Wilson.”

Not a dry eye in the house. Classical fucking Logan… swooping in and making a bigger impact on the audience, as always.

“Who has the rings?” Colossus inquired, primarily asking Logan because everyone knew not to allow Wade to keep them in his possession. He could be trusted with getting milk on the way home from a mission or feeding the dog every single night, but when it came to their wedding rings, it was better to be safe than sorry. Laura pulled out a small velvet jewelry bag that contained the rings out of her bouquet and passed it over to Logan. He took the ring he had picked for Wade out of the small bag and placed it onto his ring finger. Being an expert sword fighter, Wade could always keep a steady hand. But now? His body was shaking. He was barely keeping his shit together. It felt like his entire body was vibrating with excitement, anxiety, joy, adoration, desire… Once the ring made its way down his finger, the mutant brought Wade’s hand to his lips to press a kiss onto it.

Logan flipped the small bag over and out plopped the ring Wade had picked out for Logan. It was beautiful. Both rings were. The pair had been specially made out of adamantium and each had one singular garnet gemstone and a yellow sapphire embedded in. Wade had saved up every penny he could to get those rings and did NOT steal them in any way, shape, or form. Got it? Good.

Colossus continued to read from the book he held in his hands, flipping to a particular page.

“These rings represent infinity, signifying your eternal love and bond. It is a visible promise that you are forever devoted to each other through the highs and the lows, the hardships and in prosperity, when the sun shines and when it rains-“

“Hey, big guy,” Wade whispered, giving the steel man his best side eye. “That’s all very sweet, and I love the sentiment, I really do, but I’m dying to kiss this smoking hot, very soon to be completely off the market hunk right here. Finish strong, ‘kay?”

The steel mutant sighed and rubbed his forehead with his palm, closing the book he was reading from in the other.

“I am not really sure if any of this is actually legal due to Logan being from another timeline, but, by the power vested in me by the state of New York, I now pronounce you… married! You may now share a kiss.”

Wade had practically launched himself into Logan in an effort to be as close to him as possible. If body parts happened to rub against each other in the process, that was just good luck. Not for everyone else attending the wedding, but that's neither here nor there. Logan took Wade’s face into his hands and they shared a deep kiss, a familiar warmth consuming both of their mended hearts. It was a kiss that hit both their bodies like a tidal wave, and sent all of their emotions into a frenzy. Every guest broke out in a supportive cheer, and the orchestral music began to play again. When the two men broke away from the kiss, they walked back down the aisle, hand in hand, as newlyweds.

_________

Set against the rustic charm of the old barn on the venue’s property, the wedding reception was this small and cozy atmosphere. There were golden string lights hung up all around the ceiling that gave the inside of the barn just the right amount of glow. It was enough to see one another, but it was dark enough that you could relax and unwind from the evening. Every table was adorned with lanterns and floral arrangements that accompanied the bridal bouquets from the ceremony. There were several fire pits set up outside so that guests could go outside and drink under the stars. The DJ had a steady stream of music pouring out of the speakers, and people were already starting to drink and dance on the makeshift dance floor. It was utterly perfect.

The DJ lowered the volume on the music and started to speak on the microphone.

“I’d like to turn everyone’s attention to the doors at the front of the barn to give a warm welcome to the newlyweds…”

The barn doors opened allowing Logan and Wade to walk in together, hand in hand, all smiles and full of so much joy.

“Please clear the dance floor so these two lovebirds can share their first dance as a married couple.”

The entire barn erupted in applause as the happy couple walked inside and onto the dance floor, people moving out of their way so that they could share their first dance.

Aretha Franklin’s I Never Loved A Man (The Way I Love You) started to play softly from the speakers, the sultry jazz and blues music adding to the coziness of the atmosphere. It was an interesting song choice for sure, but the couple had made quite an interesting pair.

Wade pulled Logan close and wrapped his arms around the older mutant’s waist, the biggest smile permanently fixed onto his face. Logan looked at Wade, his eyes softening, and draped his arms around Wade’s shoulders. They slowly grooved together to the music and took another opportunity to kiss each other, this time a little more risque than it had been back at the ceremony. It was their wedding, damnit, and Wade could NOT be expected to keep his hands or his lips to himself for the rest of the evening.

“You know, I keep waiting to wake up from this dream. This just can’t be my life,” Wade murmured as he danced with his new husband. His husband. His Logan.

“Wow, and you didn’t even say ‘wet dream.’ I’m a little offended. I got all dressed up in this nice suit, let Yukio fix my hair, and you’ve hardly made any inappropriate comments about my ass. I’m even wearing that thong you bought that says ‘eat me.’”

“We’re gonna come back to that last thing, but I’m a married man now. That’s like, major adult-like behavior,” the merc replied back, watching Logan immediately rolling his eyes and laughing at his response.

“Plus, I promised Colossus that I would act appropriately tonight. As soon as he leaves for the mansion though, I’m not gonna stop making inappropriate comments about your ass. I’m gonna say absolutely vulgar and obscene things about it, to be quite honest. And don’t even get me started on the kitty ears you got going on up there,” Wade yapped on, taking his index finger and swirling the little cowlick on top of Logan’s head. “And good choice on the whole monochromatic black look. A callback to 2013’s The Wolverine when you attended Yashida’s funeral? Arguably one of the only good decisions Fox ever made.”

Logan did what he always had to do to get The Merc With a Mouth to shut up and planted another big sloppy kiss onto his lips, successfully getting his message across. Loud and clear. They continued like that for most of the night, swaying together to the music, hands all over one another, drunk off of the bliss they felt just being with each other like this. Married. In love. Soulmates. Forever.

[jade-green-butterfly]

Today...is a very special and important day for me, folks~💝😊Three years ago, a certain special troll became the highlight of my 2020 during rough times and immediately won my heart from the moment I knew he would have his own destiny and journey to find others like him...and his family. Since the first Trolls movie, I have always admired dearly him from afar and the moment I saw him during the Trolls World Tour trailer, my heart literally poured out him and I have truly loved him for just being his wonderful, lovable self ever since~💘🥹 And that certain special troll, is none other than...Cooper~💗🌈✨

I have always been a big fan of him and he’s always been my favourite troll to begin with but every time I see him and hear him, my heart always beats so much for him, making it aflutter and words cannot describe how special he is to me...how he means the whole world to me~💞🌈💗🌈💞I mean...can you blame me? >//w//`< How could I resist and say no to such an adorable face to go with such a darling like him??💖😍💖😍💖 Cooper is more than just the goofball that we all know and love...he’s my goofball and so much more...~🥹The most amazing troll with such talent, a unique voice and a dazzling yet loving royal family to go with him...~🌟Cooper is also the prince of my heart, who deserves all the love and happiness in the world...and I feel so blessed to be the one to give it all to him, along with my heart~🥰💝💝🥰 April 24th 2020 was the day I drew Cooper for the very first time, and when I started shipping myself with him. And together, him and I have remained strong and inseparable ever since!🫶🏻😌💕We’ve had such happy memories together - becoming part of his world and family, sharing one another’s lives and music, even officially marrying and creating our own dear little life together~✨💜💗💚✨And I wish to keep on loving Cooper forevermore~💓😊

Which is why I dedicate this very special piece above (with a textless version too) to us, inspired by one of my favourite scenes in TWT - where King Quincy and Queen Essence were happily together with their twin eggs (before our dear Cooper was cruelly snatched away from them😭) and I wished to capture that tender moment between Cooper and I, with our darling Toby's egg nestled warmly within my hair~🥰 EEEEEEE~!!😍🤩😍I am so, sooooo happy and truly over the moon of how all of this turned out~!💖🥹💖Just how I imagined it, especially Cooper snuggling against me with his neck wrapped around me as we lovingly embrace one another, feeling like the proud parents we are~💜💗💚😚I am also chuffed with the cherry blossoms I drew to make the bed cover look more prettier~🌸 I would like to deeply and gratefully thank many wonderful peeps out there for helping bring my beloved OTP to life, such as my lovely @x-elyssa-x, KaitlinEXE, @gloryraiin, @jaguardorado16, @vampireflowerarts, @zoey-nillesen, @king-trollex-fangirl, @glitchy-witchy1994, @blooeyedtroll, @kittyball23, @angoraram, @yeenstrollart, @asa-de-ouro, @whiteflame-selfship and many more, for all the beautiful commissions, gift art and loving support you have given me over the past four years, and for putting all your fantastic work and effort, and heart and soul into every single one which I absolutely love to this very day~💞🌟💙💜💛💚🌟💞 I can’t thank you all and the rest of the Trolls Fandom enough for how amazing and welcoming you’ve all been to me when I first jumped onto the bandwagon, and I am so happy I did too!💖🤗Thank-you all so much for everything, including all the dear friends I’ve made and all the loving supporters I have gained - bless you all and don’t stop being awesome~!✌🏻🤩✨💕 And finally, thank-you ever so much for everything, Cooper...my cupcake king and sweet jellybean~🩷♛🧁🫂For always being there for me, making me feel such love and happiness I never could imagine~💝🥰🌈I am truly blessed and the luckiest lass alive to such a wonderful darling like you in my life and by my side~💗😇🪽U///w///U

🎊💜♓💗♎💚🎉~Happy 4th Anniversary, Cooper...my beloved prince, my one & only...~ I love you so much with all my heart, more than life itself...and I will keep on loving you so, forevermore and beyond~🎉💜♓💗♎💚🎊

*~Reblogs are also deeply appreciated as well, so please do reblog as well as like! Thank-you kindly!~*

Cooper (c) DreamWorks Trolls/DreamWorks Animation

Trollsona Jussy/Justina Butterfly & Toby/Toby's Egg (c) @jade-green-butterfly​ (Me~!)

[band--psycho]

Sylus x Reader - No Going Back

Main Masterlist / Sylus Masterlist / Join My Taglist

My first Sylus story...Before anyone asks, yes there will be a part 2 to this!

Please be kind; reblogs are always welcome and greatly appreciated!

Thank you all for the continued support and I hope you all enjoy this! 💛

Requests are open so if you have any ideas/requests, you're more than welcome to send them over

I do not give permission for any of my works to be copied or translated onto this site or other platforms

Warnings: Mature themes, mentions of sex , swearing

Sleeping with Sylus was a mistake; at least that’s what you kept telling yourself whenever you felt your memories drifting to him and the night you had spent together not too long ago. 

Sleeping with him was one of the best mistakes you’d made in a long time, but it was a mistake nonetheless; one that you couldn’t risk making again. 

That’s why you’d been ignoring not only his calls, but also Luke and Kierans. 

You needed to put distance between you and the leader of Onychinus; in your mind this was a simple thing to do, you just needed to talk or see him. 

But in reality, this ended up being much harder than you could’ve ever imagined it being. 

You missed him. 

You wanted to talk to him. 

You wanted to be around him. 

You wanted the ‘mistake’ you kept thinking about so often, to happen again. 

You wanted him and being the one purposefully put the distance between the two of you hurt. 

A small sigh left your lips when you saw your phone light up with another incoming call from his number. 

You knew you should just block his number; it would certainly make trying to ignore him easier, but you could never bring yourself to do it. 

For a few seconds, your finger hovered over the flashing green answer button, your heart just longing to hear his voice again even if it was just to hear him say a few words. 

But then  your mind regained control over your emotions, you couldn’t talk to him 

It would just make everything harder.

So you declined the call and tossed your phone onto the couch, in an attempt to avoid any temptation. 

You were going to go out for a walk, in the hopes that it would potentially help you clear your head, but when you opened your door, you were met with the very person you’d been avoiding.

“We need to talk,” Sylus said simply, slipping past you and into your apartment. 

You stood there for a few moments, trying to process what was happening as well as trying to work out what you were going to do. 

You could run? 

But he’d catch you. 

You could stay.

But that came with its own risks.

“I suggest you shut the door, unless you want people to start asking questions,” he continued, snapping you out of your thoughts. 

Run. 

Stay. 

Run..

Stay…

Your heart won the battle. 

You closed the door, trying to persuade yourself that you were only doing this so that no one found out that he was here and not because you wanted to see him. 

You took a deep breath, before turning to look at Sylus, whose rube eyes were fixed on you. 

“You know it’s very rude to ignore phone calls from people,” he pointed out, using his evol to lift my phone from the couch and into his hands. 

Eventhough he hid it well, you could see the hurt in his eyes…that look, that fleeting look of sadness was enough to make you want to break every single rule you’d been giving yourself. 

“You can’t be here,” Y/n said, holding his gaze. 

What if he got caught? 

What if someone found out you two knew each other? 

It was too dangerous for both of you. 

“You’ve been avoiding me, what else was I meant to do?” he asked, raising an eyebrow inquisitively, taking a few steps closer towards you. 

You didn’t answer his question; you didn’t know how to. 

You didn’t know what to say to him. 

So you just remained silent. 

A sigh fell from his lips as he took a few more steps closer to you, all but destroying the distance you knew you needed to keep between each other. 

You went to take a step back, only for your back to collice the front door of your apartment. 

Almost instantly, Sylus took advantage of this opportunity; placing one hand by your waist and the other next to your hand, essentially trapping you between him and the door. 

“Conversations only work if both people are talking sweetie,”

Fuck that nickname. 

Fuck the way it fell from his lips. 

Fuck the way it made your heart skip a beat whenever he used it. 

Fuck him. 

Oh how you wanted to. 

Yo needed to keep your resolve, but that was slowly dwindling away with every moment that passed

“Why?” he asked, his quiet tone making you wonder if he’d really said anything at all, until he repeated himself, “Why have you been avoiding me?” 

There it was again; that flicker of hurt in his eyes that made you want to do nothing more than just reach out and kiss him. 

As you glanced up at him; the words that you’d been pushing to the back of your mind, were somehow suddenly on the tip of your tongue 

You tried so many times to tell yourself that it wasn’t true, to try and push the feelings that you had for Sylus away. 

But it was all a lie. 

You’d fallen for the leader of Onychinus….

You saw Sylus’ eyes narrow in frustration at your continued silence, as another exasperated sigh came from his lips. 

“I’ve been avoiding you,” you started, the sound of your sudden uneasy voice, catching his attention instantly as he waited intently for you to continue.

“Because I’m falling-”

Your admission was cut short as Sylus moved the hand that had been by your head and put it  over your mouth, silencing you. 

He leaned in close, so close that you could feel his breath tickling your skin. 

“Careful, sweetie,” he warned, slowly removing his hand from your mouth before placing it on your jaw, allowing his thumb to run across your bottom lip. 

This is exactly the type of situation you were trying to avoid. 

But you couldn’t bring yourself to pull away from his touch, instead you felt yourself instinctively melting into it. 

“You can’t take those words back once you say them,” he breathed, glancing down at your lips before meeting your eyes again. 

You didn’t want to take those words back. 

You wanted to say them. 

But then a thought raced through your mind; what happened once you did? 

Your internal battle was cut short when Sylus leaned in closer to you. 

What you didn’t know was that Sylus wanted to say those words as much as you did. 

You were staring at him; with those gorgeous y/e/c eyes, not knowing that these last few days had felt like a living hell. 

He needed you, craved you…and not being able to even so much as talk to you, was enough to drive him to the brink of madness. 

And that’s why he was here; risking everything, just to be with you. 

“Touching you was a bad idea,” he smirked, his lips inches away from yours.

“The worst,” you whispered in agreement, feeling how quick your heart was beating inside your chest. 

You knew what you were doing, knew that if you didn’t stop what had already begun to happen, that there would be no going back. 

“We should stop,” you breathed, feeling the last of your resolve completely disappearing. 

“That would be the logical thing to do,” he answered back; his eyes glancing between your lips and eyes again, silently asking for permission to close what little distance was left between you. 

“Fuck it,” you sighed, throwing your arms around the back of his neck before standing on the tips of your roes and crashing your lips onto his.

Tagging some people who might enjoy this:

@xacatalepsyx @book-dragon03 @hiqhkey @fangirlsfandomsss @albert-moriarty-fan @elegantangelenthusiast @worm-in-a-bug @darkphoenix2332 @deathkat657 @xenasolos @tasha-1994 @randomruff @mrs-masen-cullen @okaydokey @the-slytherin-poet @taronyuhunter @reverbsworld @serenitymaria @babygirl-panda19 @themagicafox

[k-s-morgan]

Hi, I don't know how to write this differently... I'm kinda, little bit, very very worried 😅 I don't want to make you feel obligated to answer this, with the electric outages and everything, but please just a little update if you're ok 🩷 Rusáci jsou kundy, přeji ti hodně sil 💛💙 srdečné pozdravy z Česka (Russians are cunts, I wish you strength, теплий привіт з Чехії*)

*I could only think of best wishes in English, which is not the same, so I hope google translated it with the same warm sentiment 😊

Ask from @princessgotham21: Hi Kat, we've not heard from you in a while so I hope you're safe and okay. I don't care about updates, I just genuinely want to know your wellbeing. Sending prayers and love 🤍

Ask from @seiji-amasawa: I’ve been following your stories for years now, and with news headlines about what’s going on in Ukraine has me really nervous for your well being. I hope you and your loved ones are doing well. You’re in my thoughts <3

Ask from @disappearinghills: You haven’t posted in a week, I hope you’re okay love❤️

-----

Hi! I'm finally home and with a steady connection - in fact, while I was gone, my Dad did some techno-magic, so now I'll have the Internet even when there is no power! Seeing all these asks made me so warm and happy, and cared for. Thank you all so much! I really didn't expect the connection to be this bad in the mountains. That place had WiFi, both of my cell operators were accessible, and yet nothing connected properly 99% of time. Not sure how it works. On the other hand, I took a really good rest from the war-related news, air raids, and other stuff. I heard just one explosion at a distance in over 2 weeks.

@jebemtimater7890, ah, I really appreciate your sentiment <3 Дуже дякую за такі чудові слова! It always warms me so much to know that so many people from different countries support Ukraine. Maybe it's the result of my vacation, but I started to feel a little more optimistic about the war than I have in over a year. Not sure it will last long, but it's such a relief to feel like this for now.

I went to the mountains with my Mom, and the place we were staying at had the loveliest cat who instantly realized I'll be more than happy to let her share my bed :D It was very hot for one week, and then it rained non-stop for the next one, so we got all kinds of experiences.

I'll miss the peace and quiet of that place, but being home is also good! I missed my set of silly pets, half of whom didn't immediately recognize me and tried to flee before figuring out who I am :D

The first part of a series of ATLWETD updates will be up in a few hours. I'm doing the last quick read - it probably isn't necessary, I've edited it already, but I can't help it, I always feel like I'll catch some more mistakes/unfortunate turns of phrases.

[backwardsbread]

Hi!! I loved your Hazbin character proposal headcanons for Lucifer, Alastor and Vox! I was wondering if you could do the same for Angel dust x gn! reader and how Angel thinks about the idea of marriage and how he would propose? Thank you love!!❤️

Uhh- ABSOLUTELY I WILL- DONT GOTTA ASK ME TWICE 💛💛

The support in my last two writings was OVERWHELMING- I have a ton of stuff saved in my drafts that I’m finishing up, so more is to come. But I’ll never turn down an opportunity to write more fluffy scenarios.

They heal my soul— ANYWAYS, I hope you enjoy~ I had so much fun writing this- this is my first time writing AngelDust, so bear with me!

AngelDust x GN!Reader

~Marriage proposal~

Warnings‼️: Mentions of past trauma, established relationship, mentions of harassment, working for the V’s, swearing, fluff, Gn!reader, toxic work environment, mentions of Valentino?? I think that’s it?

~Not proofread~

Angel Dust:

The thought of marriage very much unsettled AngelDust.

Sure, on the inside, Angel was a complete sap. He loved pure sentiments, mushy couple clichés, the thought of loving somebody as much as his heart and soul would allow.

It all made Angel’s heart skip.

But in his head, all of that was just fairytales. Stuff he only saw on screen. The real thing was ugly.

Messy, uncomfortable, and painful. Throughout his life and throughout hell, romance didn’t come as pure and joyous.

It came as rough, forceful, and sad. So he threw his hopes and dreams of being swept off his feet to happily ever after out the window.

Besides, it threw off his entire persona of who he was in Hell! His face was on every other build-board, showing off a lewd expression or erotic poses.

It’s who sinners knew him as. AngelDust. The porn demon who fell for Valentino’s tricks.

You were a film assistant, not exactly an actor/actress, but you did more work behind the scenes.

You helped AngelDust with makeup, scripts, costumes (that were absolutely useless in your opinion when most got torn to shreds during filming)

You were there to offer water to him, a rag when needed, overall you were pretty much a silent helping hand. An oddly comforting presence for Angel.

Whenever you would help Angel with production, he would find a sense of relief knowing he wouldn’t be rushed or harassed before working. He could sit in comfortable silence with you or rant about his long day.

You didn’t speak back a lot to Angel, only giving occasional hums of acknowledgement, or quiet directions for helping put on his makeup.

You weren’t trying to be rude or anything, you just knew that Angel needed a listening ear more than anything.

The first time Angel heard you add to his ranting was when Angel was telling a story about Valentino. One of his favorites to tell, when the moth man couldn’t count up the cash Angel had just earned for him, despite it only being three bills.

At the mention of the overlords name you mumbled a quiet, ‘blind moth bitch’ under your breath, that clearly caught Angel off guard, as he stopped his rambling immediately.

The two of you stare at each other for a moment and you fear for a moment that you crossed a boundary. That fear quickly fades when AngelDust bursts out into a fit of belly laughs and snorts.

His laughter was so contagious.

You find yourself giggling, then full on wheezing along with Angel.

You can barely finish his makeup properly that day because of the back and forth banter the two of you engaged in. Constantly in a fit of giggles or telling stories about a certain moth overlord.

Angel and you exchanged numbers after that interaction and the rest was history.

From that moment on you and Angel were texting almost everyday despite if you saw each other.

Texting turned into routine late night phone calls and occasional hang outs outside of work.

Sure, Angel would slip into his flirty persona every so often, but you had a way of bringing who he really was out.

And to Angel, it was scary, but it also felt amazing. To have somebody see him.

But Angel had walls he had built up over years and years that he had worked hard to keep stable and it would take time to tear those down.

It took time to build trust and to know you were there for no ill intent, just to be his friend and enjoy his company.

To be there for who he was and not who he had been made to be.

It was a long process getting Angel to open up to you, for you to tear down the brick walls he had surrounded himself in.

To Angel, it felt like you had done it so easily. It felt like you could see right through him!

Did Angel feel those fuzzy bubbly feelings towards you because of this? Of course he did. Was he 100 percent going to ignore them? Absolutely.

Love isn’t easy, that’s what he always knew. Yet it felt so easy to love you and that slightly terrified him.

He tried to bury his feelings for you. He cared too much about your guys’ friendship to attempt to peruse anything romantic at first.

He appreciated the friendship you guys had too much for that.

So the beginning of what you guys had together was definitely a situationship in my eyes.

Mutual pining at its best baby.

However, gossip was popular in the studio. So if one person finds out about your crush on Angel, or his crush on you, EVERYONE knows.

Once the information gets back to either one of you, depending on who got outed, you guys talk it out and decide to give a relationship a shot.

You guys aren’t really fond on telling other sinners your an item,

(Can you imagine if that information got out to Valentino?? Oh boy-)

But you most definitely aren’t ashamed to be with each other. Angel LOVES romance. He’s a sucker for it.

Cheesy love notes, bouquets of flowers, chocolates, dates, picnics, movie nights, etc.

Any mushy gushy thing on the list is all there babes.

One of Angel’s love languages is quality time. So while you guys aren’t particularly all over each other at the studio, any moment in private together you have is cherished.

Whether it’s sitting in comfortable silence cuddling with you or going out to a club together, spending time with you is important to him.

Regarding Angel’s job, you understand it’s still something he has to do. While you’re not a fan on how he’s treated, he is under a soul binding contract. There was nothing you could really do about that.

Besides, you worked for the V’s as well. It was a sticky situation.

You could only be there for him as he was there for you. Through the ups and downs that the Overlords put you two through, you guys supported each other the best you could.

Now, the thought of marriage to Angel had popped up in his head a few times. It honestly gave him the jitters.

A sort of nervous excitement. Intense anxiety that he couldn’t place in the category of positive or negative.

He knew he loved you of course. More than anything. He’d sell his soul all over again if it were for you.

But in the back of his mind, he couldn’t shake the thought of this all being too good to be true. You were in Hell after all. Couldn’t all be cupcakes and rainbows.

Communication was important in your guys’ relationship, so Angel did bring up this topic to you once or twice.

You could always tell how much it stressed Angel out whenever he brought up the topic, assuming it made him wildly uncomfortable.

You always made sure to reassure him that no matter what, you would be his, even if you didn’t wear a pretty halo on your finger to represent that.

And each time you gave your reassurance, he would cover your face with kisses, showering you in affections for your understandings.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When Angel told you about moving into Charlie Morningstar’s little hotel, you were a bit skeptical. But hey, anything was better than staying with the V’s 24/7.

It was a sort of escape. Of course you didn’t take the Princess’s cause too seriously, but she gave the both of you a place to crash rent free, so you played nice.

Besides, the hotel was a place you and Angel could be more open about your guys’ relationship. It opened a new world you guys didn’t have back at the studio’s in a toxic work environment.

It felt more domestic. It felt comforting. It was more private and intimate for you guys. It felt like the two of you were taking your relationship to the next level.

But moving was a hassle.

Having to haul all of yours and Angel’s belongings into one hotel room seemed impossible and was exhausting.

Especially with Angel’s extensive wardrobe and his pampered pigs lavish lifestyle.

(Seriously, that pig had a bedazzled water bowl)

You had just arrived back at the hotel from grabbing the last of your belongings.

Hauling the box down the hallway, your door feeling like it was getting further away as you dragged your feet down the extensive hallway.

You fish your key out of your pocket while balancing the box against the wall and atop your knee, trying not the drop it.

You fiddle with the lock, slowly turning the key counterclockwise, then pushing down the door handle. You bump the door open with your hip, letting the box crash to the floor with unintended aggression.

Looking around the room, you’re confused when you don’t see your partner right away, he was meant to be at the hotel still. Perhaps he was downstairs and you had missed him.

You close the door but hear the sound of paper crinkling and soft crunching.

Your heart nearly skips a beat when you see Fat Nuggets on your shared bed, eating fresh flowers that were laid there. He’s clearly enjoying himself, not a care in the world as he munched away at the beautiful bouquet that was no doubt meant for you. It had all your favorites arranged beautifully while Fat Nuggets saw it as a free buffet.

You’re quick to wrap your hand around the pigs torso, pulling him back from the bouquet. You grab the greenery with your other hand, lifting it off the bed away from the troublemaker, who was letting out dissatisfied squeals, upset he didn’t get to finish his snack.

You scold the pig, looking at the damage he had done to the gift your lover had gotten you. You frown a bit, feeling bad that it was a bit ruined, but nonetheless, your heart melts at the gesture. Seeing as Angel went out of his way to get you a gift with no special occasion in mind.

The pig squirms in your hand, that’s when you notice something foreign around his neck. Anxiety shoots through you and you’re quick to drop the flowers, trying to coax the pig into allowing you to take off whatever was on him.

Fat Nuggets put up a bit of a fight, annoyed at the sudden tussle you had started with him, but you succeeded in pulling off the piece of twine that was wrapped around his neck. Once it’s off, you release him, mumbling an apology to the pig as he retreats to his plush pet bed.

You sigh, adrenaline high falling as you hold the piece of twine in your hands. You look down at it, assuming it was part the bouquet he was feasting on.

When examining it, you see a piece of silver/gold tied in the middle. You pick up the band, twisting it to look at it from each angle. When it dawns on you what it actually is, you don’t have time to react.

Your lover is now walking into the room, holding a bag of your guys’ favorite takeout in one hand and a gift box in his lower set of arms. His phone is pressed up against his ear with his one free hand and you can hear Cherri’s voice booming from the other side of the phone.

The two of you make eye contact and it becomes an intense staring contest for what feels like the rest of eternity. Cherri’s screaming fading into background noise while Angel’s face contorts into panic as he sees the display in front of him.

Torn flowers, a very grumpy pig in the corner, and ring gripped in your hand as if you were trying to hide the fact that you knew what was happening.

Without breaking his gaze from you, Angel hung up on Cherri. He finally looks away from you, trying to find anything to relieve the tension in the room.

“Soo.. uhh.. how much did Nugs tell ya?”

He asks nervously, sitting down next to you on the bed.

You stare at him dumbfounded for a moment.

Was he making a joke now of all times??

You can’t help but grin and snort, covering your mouth. You smack him lightly before laughing at what he had said. Tension completely melting away by your lovers remark.

Angel relaxes and smiles, adrenaline in his body still running high. He sets down the food he had brought in on the bedside table and the gift box on the ground.

He gently grabs your hand that held the ring tied in with twine, causing your laughter to calm down. You slowly open your hand, revealing the piece of jewelry. Angel slowly takes it from you.

Realization of what is happening dawns on this man WAY too late. He fidgets with the ring, trying to undo the twine from it, his fingers trembling slightly. He swears under his breath while trying to explain himself.

He stumbles over his words, explaining how this subject had been a constant in his mind for a long time now.

He knew you had said you would be fine without a ring, but he wanted to get you something special for staying with him. A symbol on your finger that you would always be his, whether you be near or far.

He didn’t want to be with anyone else. It was you and it was always going to be you.

His proposal was slightly awkward, butchered, and god was it cheesy.

But it didn’t fail to make you emotional. It was so intimate and personal. Despite it not going quite as Angel had planned, it was perfect in your eyes.

If you could have hearts in your eyes, you totally would

Angel fidgeted with the ring, unsure on what to say next. He started to ramble a bit, saying something along the lines of if it was too soon he would totally understand.

Which you respond by quickly plucking the ring away from him, and sliding it onto your finger. He looks at you, blinking a few times before blushing brightly at your acceptance.

You chuckle at his reaction, gently holding one set of his hands, and pressing a gentle kiss against his lips.

Angel melts into you, reciprocating your embrace and cupping up your face in his other set of hands.

You smile, leaning into your lover. Feeling absolutely enveloped by adoration.

Before the two of you can fall too much into each others embrace, you’re interrupted by the sound of curious snorts and snuffs.

The two of you pull away from each other, looking down to see Fat Nuggets with his head in the gift box Angel had brought into the room. His curled tail wagging away excitedly as if the gift was for him.

Angel bolts up, quickly lifting up the pet pig who lets out an alarmed squeal. You can’t help but laugh as Angel scolds Nugs, who had spoiled another surprise your partner had set out for you today.

Yeah.. this was something you could definitely get used to.

[van-yangyin]

Following Custom Content I shared the other day, here is EyeTree Head Set that contain a EyeTree head and Eyes of Tree Accessory for all ages. Hope you enjoy this one! 💗

Short brief when this post is published: I'm currently without pc because it's being repaired since it was failing me, so I leave you this publication that I left prepared. Until I have it back, it's possible that I won't be much on my social medias. When I return I'll answer to your lovely asks and replies. @lea-heartscxiv will probably lend me his, but it will only be for occasional times like posting things we've worked on together or new CC if pc takes too long to repair. Thank you for your patience with me ❤

They look at you, they judge you, they discriminate against you. From a planet far away from Sixam, called Lerighett, reside these tree-headed beings with eyes. They're said to be of many varieties and species, though residents of the hidden lands of Heyadee are one of the most frowned upon for being so perceptive and judgmental. If they have more eyes around them, they may be even more judgmental for being able to see beyond your soul. 👁️🌳

Download under keep reading ↓

If you download my CC it means your agree with my T.O.U (English/Español/日本語).

EyeTree Head

General Info:

13 swatches

Base game compatible

Located on Detail Skin, Forehead

all ages

disable for werewolves (don't show good on them)

all LOD's

All Maps (Diffuse, Normal, Specular)

Mesh and texture made from scratch by me

Custom Thumbnails

Compatible with higher and lower game sliders

Known problems: Some parts of the trunk may go deeper into the skin. Since is placed in Skin Details, Forehead, both packages are shown, no matter the gender, but they're written as Male Frame and Female Frame on thumbnail so that they can be easily recognized. Try to use them properly so they don't look bad unless that is the result you want to achieve.

LOD Information: LOD0: 7232 poly | LOD1: 3615 poly | LOD2: 1806 poly | LOD3: 903 poly

IF YOU LIKE MY WORK PLEASE CONSIDER BECOME A PATREON OR TIP ON KO-FI. ANY HELP IS ALWAYS WELCOMED BUT ALWAYS OPTIONAL. YOU CAN ALSO COMMISSION ME HERE OR FROM TUMBLR, IF YOU WANT ME TO DO SOMETHING SPECIFIC FOR YOU.  THANK YOU FOR YOUR SUPPORT!

※Choose download the one/ones you want the most or only download Merged: "_T-E_Merged" or "_AllMerged" where all the files are together.※

✨DOWNLOAD LINK✨ (Patreon ~ Always free, no adfly) [Same link]

✨DOWNLOAD LINK✨ (SFS ~ Always free, no adfly)

Photo in CAS and in-game photo without shaders:

~⭐️~

Eyes of Tree Accessory

General Info:

1 swatch, since use eye texture

Base game compatible

Located on Detail Skin, Crease

all ages

all LOD's

Mesh made from scratch by me

Custom Thumbnails

LOD Information: LOD0: 2880 poly | LOD1: 1440 poly | LOD2: 720 poly | LOD3: 360 poly

Do you want to know what else I'll be releasing this month and on what day? You can support me on Patreon or Ko-Fi and find out in this posts, here (Patreon) and here (Ko-Fi).

※Choose download the one/ones you want the most or only download Merged: "_T-E_Merged" or "_AllMerged" where all the files are together.※

✨DOWNLOAD LINK✨ (Patreon ~ Always free, no adfly) [Same link]

✨DOWNLOAD LINK✨ (SFS ~ Always free, no adfly)

Photo in CAS:

Compatible with LightHead/EyeHead and without LightHead:

~⭐️~

Btw, do you saw my last CC post? ⬇️

HERE

This CC is made in part in honor of the fucking eyes (the big one and the little ones) of Arc the Lad the Twilight of Spirits, who gave me and Lea a hard time many many years ago to defeat them. They aren't the same, but every time I was doing it I was thinking about them. Has anyone else played this game? I loved it and I love it!

Let me know if you find any problem. 🙏❣️ Also if you use this or any of my CC, feel free to tag me so I can see your sims, it will make me very happy to see it!

👀👉MORE DOWNLOADS

Happy simming! 🍀

💛

🛹 You can find me also on Patreon | Pinterest | Ko-Fi | Blogger (Shared with Lea) | Instagram | X (Twitter) | My F.A.Q. | My T.O.U. | MORE DOWNLOADS 🛹

[theeretblr]

Hi. This is prolly not gonna be seen but n case you do, i wanna thank you! I live in a country where people likeus arent really.....welcome, but youve made me so comfortable in my own self. Without your help and things you do to make positivity spread, especially about matters that are usually (to me)said to be wrong, i have been able to come out to most of my friends and even some of my family(only my sister lol)

Without you i probably would have still been confused , hating the lgbt and hating myself most of all.

So thank you! for the work you do, to make so MANYY people like me feel safer

I am so proud to hear about your journey and I wish you so much luck as you continue onwards! I never thought I would be able to have this level of impact on so many lives. I remember how alone I felt trying to work my own stuff out when I was younger. I had so little representation that I thought I'd have to bury and hide how I felt in order to be "normal".

When there are more people who feel able to be comfortably themselves, then others will see their journey and perhaps gain the confidence to pursue their own self-discovery! Being open and comfortable with yourself helps others do the same, even if you don't know them.

You matter! Take care of yourself, take care of others, you are loved, you are supported, we're here for you all. Be proud to be you! ❤️🧡💛💚💙💜

Also, this is a very useful resource on Coming Out and general LGBTQ+ terminology from the Trevor Project. It's been a while since I shared it here, so here it is again! :)

[dovedewdrop]

The One That Got Away

In another life

I would be your girl / 1.7k

A/N: Hi! Welcome to my first fic! I've been super anxious to put this out but also itching to write something so here we are🤗 I hope you enjoy🩷

Also thank you to one of my besties @gracieispunk for being so supportive always🥹 she truly has a heart of gold and deserves the world💛 Happy 5 months of friendship🫶🏻👹

Warnings: Post-Outbreak. Mean!Joel. Just pure angst tbh. sad vibes.

---

The last time he had kissed you was the morning of the outbreak, long and passionate, his arm slung around your lower back, your hand on his chest. He’d done it to shut you up really, both you and Sarah on his case about how he was working late, on his birthday of all days, but you both knew why he had to, it was the same reason you picked up extra shifts at work too, you had a wedding to plan and weddings weren’t cheap no matter how low-key they were.

Now you sat at your kitchen table in Jackson in the house you shared with Tommy and Maria, your fingertips ghosting across your bottom lip as you reminisced on that morning. Soon those sweet memories that seemed to be coated in an orange hue were contrasted with shades of blue, Joel had changed, he became a man you didn’t recognise, a man who was cold towards you.

You knew deep down that he didn’t blame you for what had happened, but he had to be mad at someone. At first he just withdrew into himself, but it didn’t take long for him to become outwardly mean, you felt pathetic as you followed behind him up dirt paths and across fields and embarrassed when one day he’d stopped in his tracks, drew in a long breath, and muttered, “wish you’d just leave already,” stalking off up the hill and leaving Tommy to comfort you.

So that’s what you did, you and Tommy, you left with no idea where you’d end up and it killed you to turn around at the edge of the woods and see Joel sitting there on his own, snapping sticks in his hand as if it was your heart he was holding.

You wiped your tears away with the back of your hand and downed the rest of your coffee before placing the mug in the sink, grabbing a checked fleece from the hook on your way out the door. The air outside was biting, bringing a rosiness to your cheeks which you didn’t really mind, you’d be out of the cold and in the Bison soon enough. You took note of the patrol coming back in through the gates and smiled at some of the other families as you weaved your way through the crowds of people who had stopped in the streets.

“Tommy!” You stopped dead in your tracks. Tommy was a popular man around here; someone was always looking for him but there was no mistaking whose voice that was. When you turned ever so slightly they were embracing in a hug, it made your heart burst to see them together like that, how they used to be, how Joel used to be. He seemed a lot brighter, full if a bit more life. You scanned the horses and noticed a young girl amongst the patrollers, someone you hadn’t seen before, you wondered if she was his, if he’d met someone new after you, fallen in love again and decided to have another kid, you wondered if he was healed, if she’d healed him. 

When you turned your attention back to them he was already looking at you and for the first time in your life you couldn’t read him, his emotions had always been so strong, when he loved it was with his whole heart and as you came to find out, when he hated, that was with his whole heart too.

You tore your gaze away from his and headed towards the pub, clutching at your chest, you were grateful that you didn’t have to open for another hour as you slumped against the wooden cupboard behind the bar, trying your best to regulate your breathing, eyes closed and head pounding. As you’d finally calmed down and peeled your eyes open you noticed a head full of curls peaking over the bar, Tommy.

“You know he was coming?” You asked, with a slight shake evident in your voice.

“Nah, guys picked him and the girl up whilst out on patrol.” He began rounding the bar to sit on the floor with you.

“Is that his daughter?”

“Don’t think so, haven’t had chance to speak to him properly yet, ‘ad to come check on you.” He nudged your shoulder with his and gave you a sincere smile, one which you returned, he’d always looked out for you and now that Joel was back that wasn’t going to change. “Take the rest of the afternoon off, I’ve got it covered here.” 

“Thanks Tommy,” you pull him into a hug before standing up and heading home. 

You take a hot shower and try to drown out the recurring memories of how Joel fell out of love with you, of how when he looked at you his eyes no longer held warmth, how when you’d touch him he’d flinch and looked away. When you sat at your dresser your eyes fixed on your engagement ring that sat in a wooden box that the carpenter in Jackson had been kind enough to make, it wasn’t incredibly fancy, you weren’t into big sparkly rocks, but the green amethyst stone was the most beautiful thing you’d ever seen, and it made your heart burst to know that he picked it. 

You don’t know how long you’ve been sat at the dresser but when you snap out of your trance you realise you don’t quite know what to do with the rest of your afternoon, perhaps you should’ve carried on with your shift, but you know there’s no arguing with Tommy. Eventually you decide on grabbing a book from the bookshelf and sitting outside on the porch with a cup of coffee. That’s when you see him again, or rather hear him. The door to the Bison swings and he storms out, jacket in hand, boots trudging through the sludgy remnants of snow until he stops in the middle of the street, he looks down and you watch, over the top of your book, as his body lets out a breath he seems to have been holding in for a long time. 

You try to hold your tongue but you’re not about to let him walk around in this town and ignore you. “Get into a fight with Tommy?” you question, placing your book down in your lap and pulling the blanket further up your legs. His head shoots up to look at you, his expression looks pained, like he knew this was coming but would prefer it to not be happening right now. 

“Somethin’ like that,” he grumbles as he slowly walks over to the house, treading lightly both figuratively and literally. 

“Ah, still the same Joel Miller, so elusive and cautious, so stony-faced,” he doesn’t answer you, just looks away to where the girl is talking to some other kids, “of course, he wasn’t always like that,” you mumble, more to yourself than him but he still catches it.

“Don’t” He snaps back.

“Don’t?” You scoff, “that’s rich, what? Can’t handle a bit of shit back?” Again, he doesn’t answer. “That your kid?” You ask, you make sure that you breathe when you ask but really, you’re suffocating inside, you want to fawn over him, you want to hug him and cradle his head in your hand, and you want him to rub soothing circles on your hips like he used to but you’re dealing with an entirely different man now.

“No.” There’s a pause, you notice his eyes flit down to your hands, presumably searching out your ring. “Just tryna get her somewhere.” You nod at his response before silence falls over you both, your eyes drifting over to the kid.

“What’s her name?”

“Ellie.” You nod your head once again. 

You can feel everything bubbling up inside you, emotions and words and if you’re not careful they’ll come bubbling out of you in a way that you can’t control. Every second spent in his presence goads you. “You… got a boyfriend?” he asks cautiously and you roll your eyes.

“Jheez Joel, no, how are ya?” He looks down at his fingers that are resting on the wooden railing, like a little boy that’s just been told off. You don’t even know how to respond, your brain trying to categorise your thoughts and feelings like your mind is a jumble sale. 

“What ya thinking about?” His voice is soft, his eyes feel as though they’re looking into your soul, like they used to do, he was looking at you like he did when you did something he adored, something that reminded him why he loved you so damn much.

When you let out a sigh instead of an answer, he tapped both hands on the railing and pushed himself off, a slight smile that quickly turned into a frown. “See ya around.”

He stopped walking as you began speaking and you were glad his back was to you because here comes the word vomit, 

“ Thinkin about how one day, probably sometime within the next five years, my kids are gonna come runnin up on this porch and my husband is gonna come home from his patrol shift, presumably with you, and he’s gonna tell me about his day and he’ll give that little of a shit that he won’t even notice that I’m not lookin directly at him, I’m lookin past him at you. About how, when I go to tuck my kids in at night I’ll get this stabbing in my chest and this gnawing feeling in my brain telling me that I’m a bad mother because sure, I’ll love them to absolute pieces but part of me can’t help but think I’d love them more if they were your kids. About how I’ll get into bed at night, with my husband who doesn’t so much as utter a “goodnight” to me, instead just rolls over and goes straight to sleep and I’ll cry and mull over what could have been and what I wanted more than anything in the world- until the exhaustion washes over me. Then I’ll wake up the next day and do it all over again. That’s what I’m thinking about Joel.”

He turns to face you at your admission and you can see the tears in his eyes, watching as he forces them out with a blink before wiping a stray one with the back of his flannel. “See ya around,” he repeats.