#also i don’t think the term ‘rockstar’ existed back then

[the-cat-and-the-birdie]

everyone knows Hobie as ‘the punk one’ at HQ and I hc that most people just associate that with the style and music mostly especially cause of the guitar

but Noir has no idea about any of that and only knows the political side

so whenever ppl see Noir they’re like ‘omg ur bf is a rockstar!!’

and Noirs like ‘fella i dont know what the hell that is but let it be known my lover is a comrade first and foremost-‘

[bcyhoods]

BLUSHING🫀 ─── send in a character au and a scenario for a drabble or headcanons !

omg okay I need ur thoughts on fake dating with rockstar!eddie. this is a threat (I’m kidding. mostly)

BYE I NEED. musician!reader annnnnd mean eddie. (well as mean as i was able to convey, it’s barely there im sorry LOLZ)

super cool 100 celebration

fake dating with rockstar!eddie

it is absolutely, entirely a pr stunt at first.

mr. munson’s reputation is a little worse for wear at the moment. his devilish good looks can only get him out of so much trouble

and you’re an up-and-coming artist with a new single that you want to release so badly buuuuuuuuuuut

marketing! you need more outreach, more publicity, so that it can actually sell and so your label doesn’t lose money

and hey, what do ya know? you and eddie are signed to the same label! hey, they have an awesome idea

eddie is dismissive at first. he can’t make eye contact with you for more than two seconds at a time and when you’re alone he looks so grumpy

the first outing is at a diner and you’re trying to ask him questions because you’re gonna be stuck spending time together for who knows how long (and he’s also very attractive. sue you for wanting to get to know him)

“so how’d you get into music :)))”

and he kinda frowns. it’s more like a wince than anything else, like he has a splinter. and he’s like “does it matter? the faster we eat, the faster we can leave.”

and boy, does that set the mood for the rest of the evening. you’re sitting there eating a meal with someone who gives off the impression that they hate you

but as you’re walking out, he’s quick to grab onto your hand and lead the way out. and you’re like ??? until you notice the mob that stands outside

it’s so overwhelming. there’s a sea of paparazzi that you have to fight through, everyone is yelling, the camera flashes are blinding, and eddie is walking way too fast for comfort that your fingers are starting to slip from his grip

he’s glancing back at you and he notices all the lenses being shoved in your face and the really creepy whistles

so he starts shoving, elbowing, shouting expletives — which is really counterintuitive considering the terms of your relationship — in order to wrap an arm around your shoulders and guide you to the car

“are you okay? did any of em touch you? >:(”

and it gives you whiplash because this man was ignoring your existence like 10 minutes ago

i mean you don’t know that it’s because he’s disappointed. first date with somebody that is way out of his league and it’s a damn pr stunt. and you’re kind, and you make good music, but there’s no way you’re actually interested

so he keeps you at arms length because he doesn’t want to get his feelings hurt. after that day, he eases up a little though

he knows more about the industry than you do, so he’s giving you pointers, spilling little secrets

he suggests that they include a sound bite of your voice on the band’s next single and the label is eating it up

whenever you go to parties or events together and you’re wearing something that hugs your figure or shows skin, he is drooling. he cannot focus on anything anybody is saying

it’s really not hard to pretend to be in love with you cough because he’s not pretending cough

he is always touching you. even when you’re alone, his hands are holding yours, his arm is around your shoulders, his thigh is pressing against yours

obviously, he makes a show of it in front of the cameras, pulling you in so close that you’d think someone super glued your sides together. a big smack of his lips against your forehead (forehead kisses are so hard to dismiss because they’re so affectionate)

but when you’re alone, he becomes really gentle? and you didn’t think eddie munson was capable of soft touches but it’s sooooooooo

his hand rests on your lower back whenever you enter a room, it’s very light and timid though, like he doesn’t want to push any boundary. he holds your elbow too

you both think of a really sick “photo bait” that the paps can take pictures of like feeding each other grapes or pouting at each other and you guys laugh and cringe at it

on the inside though you’re both like “wait a minute why do i like this rn”

then the label catches on and they suggest that you guys need to kiss on camera when your single releases

and you’re so nervous because you guys have shared cheek and forehead kisses before, but the lips are a whole new territory

so at the release party, right at midnight, he’s beaming down at you with a smile that looks so real and genuine and his eyes are glowing

but when you lean up to kiss him, he stops you. his hands are holding your jaw and he leans over to whisper in your ear

“i want our first kiss to be in private, because we both want it. not because someone’s taking a picture.”

and your brain goes to mush like ?!?!????!!

and you discover pretty quickly that he really is a damn good kisser

[femmefatalevibe]

Hi! I just wanted to let you know I really love your blog. I turn 24 this month and I am getting a financial advisor for the first time in my life this month. I’m nervous yet really excited, I have a “scarcity mindset” mindset when it comes to money and when I go to treat myself I sometimes believe I don’t deserve it. I believe I deserve nothing but the best in this life and I am the only one responsible for my finances. Is there any way for me to break this mindset and not see money as the enemy?

Hi love! Thank you so much <3 

Happy early birthday, and congratulations on the adult milestone! You sound like a very responsible and self-aware person, which only can serve you. 

The scarcity mindset, especially around money, can be extremely difficult to break away from – especially if you grew up with less money or parents who also felt guilty for spending it. Try to reframe your money mindset with this understanding: Money is a tool that doesn’t hold inherent value but can be leveraged to help you obtain value and valuable opportunities or resources in your life. So, while saving and investing are important to obtain things like peace of mind and security to ensure your basic needs are met (especially in the event you lose a source of income), the purpose of money is to add value to your life. Sometimes, this means being on the frugal side and cutting back on your spending to pay rent, bills, medical insurance, food, electricity, etc. However, there are other times when the most valuable thing you can do for yourself, once your basic needs are met, is to invest in items, services, or experiences that provide growth opportunities in all life arenas and allow you to expand your consciousness/life experiences– therapy, a massage, a new outfit that makes you feel like a rockstar, a great meal with loved ones, a vacation to reset your body and mind. Think about the ROI on these indulgences – better mental health, physical health, and overall fulfillment or sense of well-being. In the long run, these short-term purchases might even help you make more money down the line (e.g. You splurge on that vacation and new outfit now, so you ace the job interview and get an offer that provides a significant raise from your previous position). 

Forgo the black-and-white mindset that money is limited and only exists to be conserved. You need to put your money to work (which can take on many forms) to make it work for you. Once you have your needs and an emergency fund in place, leverage this abundance to invest in other financial opportunities and means that enrich your life. Remember you deserve it. You quite literally owe it to yourself. 

Hope this helps xx 

[felassan]

Dragon Age II and Dragon Age: Inquisition concept art & assets from a 2016 talk/presentation by Matt Rhodes, titled “The World of Concept Art” [watch link & source]

It’s an interesting and insightful talk which I recommend watching, especially if you have an interest in concept art and related things like character design and how it fits into the overall game dev process. It’s also interesting to see a bit about how the DA team’s art direction/process has changed over time between games, and hear a bit about how they’ve been doing things going forwards for the next game.

This is Part 1. [Link to Part 2]

(Some notes on the commentary given on the images and in general in the presentation under the cut due to length.)

On image 2: DAII had a fast, hot production period where decisions were made very quickly. The devs knew that the central hub, Kirkwall, had been a center of an old slavery-based empire in the past, and wanted to have indications of this [in its art direction]. There were going to be giant statues that the PC eventually fought - on the right is the design for the statues as they originally were. In the top left, this is all they had for the location [owing to the intensive prod period]. They also had a general idea that they wanted to have tableaus that came to life, shown in the bottom left.

On image 3: Going back to the design of the giant statues, the beautiful golden clockwork version of the design doesn’t really say ‘tool of an ancient slavery-based empire’, so they took the model and tried to come up with something that had more of the kinds of shapes that get into the back of your head and say things like ‘aggressive, hard, simple’.

On image 4: So here they had started doing concepts trying to find some of the right poses, accessories etc that these things would have. One of the hearts of the internal ‘DA art [direction] codex’ is “gray and pointy”; if they give a concept like this to [then] Art Director Matthew Goldman he instinctively wants to go “Yes! Approve!”, and so has to kind of reign himself in a little bit.

On image 5: This is where they ended up getting to and how the concept art turned out in terms of the model, with some negotiation back and forth. This is an example of how their art direction process now tries to tell a story with the art (i.e. it tries to support the story through art aspects of the setting and the environment). Historically, they would have just thrown the French-looking, Baroque clockwork version of the statue into the game and gone with it. They are getting more and more intentional with this sort of thing.

On this image: This was an internal image made for internal discussion. The characters in it aren’t ones that exist or that became other characters, with the exception of the Warden, who kind of became Blackwall. In this image, they were trying to think about visual separation among members of a group at the most basic level (simple graphic design principles, like different shapes and colors). This image is part of trying to solve the design problem of having 4 different characters on-screen in the party at once in their games - as in, players of course need to be able to easily tell who is doing what and where.

A general comment: At BioWare, the concept artists nowadays involve themselves in the character design process much earlier than they used to. Historically, as in earlier games, the writers would write up a bunch of characters and then concept artists would be brought in to draw them. Through negotiation and back-and-forth they would then come up with something. Nowadays though, the concept artists are involved from Day 1. The writers now write down 2 words to describe a character and the artists do sketches based on that. The writers then will write a sentence and the artists will do more drawings based on that. Then it progresses to a paragraph and drawings based on that and so on. In this way it goes back and forth and they build it up so that the visual aspects and the writeup/content of the character are developed completely in tandem, complimentary to one another. This is their goal. They aren’t quite there yet, but this is what they’re trying to strive for in this area.

On image 6: These are Dorian concepts. His initial 2-word writeup was “rockstar mage”. They had different artists take different swings at him. The middle concept is Matt’s. The third concept is by Casper Konefal. Everyone was very excited about it and so it was then taken up to a more final stage (image 7).

On image 8: Casper is one of Matt’s favorite concept artists because he goes in and lovingly details absolutely everything - all the pieces of jewelry etc. Each ring has a story. This attention and level of detail and thought behind it adds authenticity and verisimilitude. 

On image 9: In game development, there is an effect on character design that can happen during review meetings. The concept/character artist will know what they need visually from a particular character’s design in order to visually tell the story and to help the character support that. Oftentimes, people who aren’t artists don’t have the language to describe this or realize that’s what’s going on in a character’s design, and instead they just see imperfections in the presented faces. What this can lead to is that unintentionally a group review meeting can slowly trim away all the features of a character that make them interesting or distinct. This is why, for many characters across the game industry, if they were shaved and had their facial decorations etc removed, it would be kind of hard to tell many of them apart, as they have all been subjected to this sort of “council sandblasting” process. Casper figured out an idea to help with this; annotating concept drawings with artistic knowledge that artists know intuitively, as has been done here. Artists know, for instance, that certain shapes and angles can allow for certain assumptions about the character to be made (for example, think about Cassandra’s personality and then consider the angular, straight strong lines that make up her face). Annotating like this and then presenting both versions alongside one another helps these aspects of character design be recognized in the review process, and helps characters remain more distinct.

On image 10: They knew that in DAI there was going to be a character who would be with the PC for the whole game - the humble little hermit, non-intrusive, someone quite closed off who the player wouldn’t know much about. “[quote] And at the very end of the game you’d basically find out that he’s Loki himself, or the embodiment of this ancient god that had been tricking you and basically manipulating you the whole time, characterized by a wolf.” And so Nick Thornborrow hung a wolf’s jaw bone off his neck and it was just there in plain sight the whole game. Because this detail was in the drawings at an early stage, it sparked conversations with the audio department, and the audio department could add touches from their end like having wolves howling when he walked into a new area. They could then get all of these different elements and things that could be hinted at, so that when you play the game a second time it’s like ‘They weren’t even hiding it!! It was there the whole time!!’ He loves that.

A general comment: Any one of BioWare’s 3D modelled characters standing in-game talking or animating probably ends up costing them something in the 40,000 - 60,000 dollar range (they calculated this).

A general comment: For DAI, the concept artists also started to get heavily involved in the storytelling side of things at a deeper level, doing things like quick’n’dirty storyboards for the cinematic designers and spending more time with the writers talking about what emotions they were trying to convey at different points and so forth. Since starting doing this, this has become a built-in part of their process.

A comment in the context of giving advice to up-and-coming and student artists, on the subject of how concepts and ideas are naturally thrown out during the process of iterating on ideas etc: “[quote] Right now, the project that I’m working on that I can’t talk about, I have 3 versions of the story in the garbage, and it’s awesome. Because now I’m working on the fourth with our lead writer and it’s so much better than it would have been otherwise and we’re doing it so much earlier so that we can actually change things up.” Said project could be DA4 or something else. (Please remember these comments were made in November 2016. MEA came out in 2017 and DA4 has been rebooted)

[source]

[sendmyresignation]

In Defense of Teenagers:

Ok so. There seems to be a general consensus that Teenagers doesn’t fit on the black parade or that it ruins the trajectory of the album or that the song order of bp needs to be changed to fit the b-sides and drop Teenagers, or it should have just been a single- basically any option other than its inclusion between Sleep and Disenchanted would have been better. now, i’m not here to tell anyone that they’re wrong- i just want to offer an alternative perspective because i truly believe Teenagers is right where it belongs and that its inclusion on that album is, in my opinion, completely necessary to the album’s narrative arc. I want to focus on the way Teenagers builds into the foundation of the Concept Record, the way it bridges the gap between Sleep and Disenchanted so as not to delegitimize Disenchanted’s impact, and the fact that no other available material fits into the struggle the Patient endures at the end of the narrative (sorry this got LONG here’s a read more)

So, before we get into the meat of Teenager’s narrative significance, i wanted to briefly mention the way it makes Black Parade a more cohesive whole in relation to the material it is mimicking. Like Black Parade as an album is structured very differently from Pink Floyd’s The Wall- but it takes a lot of the same beats and recontextualizes them for a new purpose. Both records use war and relationship troubles and school and drugs to create an atmosphere that leads to disillusionment. In The Wall, this is quite literally the protagonist, Pink, building up “bricks in the wall” that isolates him from the rest of society and lead to a downward spiral into cynicism and hate. But Black Parade uses the same tools that The Wall does to say something different- things, specifically the actions you've made or the trauma you've endured, haunts you and makes your life seem insignificant in the face of what happens to you and those regrets are what causes the Patient to fall into a cycle of damnation and cynicism. This is representative of the Patient's descent through the afterlife- each new "layer" of the Patient's exploration is equivalent to a brick in The Wall's metaphor. Additionally, in this new context, this song in particular takes The Wall’s discussions of adolescence and the vice-grip control older generations attempt to force on teens and the disillusionment with the future and retells it from a new perspective- both literally in the fact the song is now more reflective of the 2000s post-9/11 and post-columbine culture, but its also literally from the perspective of the Patient as an adult. Teenagers, as a result, becomes a necessary piece of that puzzle- it is the refraction of Another Brick in the Wall repurposed to mean something new entirely- it’s no longer about kids being forced into complacency by a cruel education system from their own perspective (the children’s choir allows them to speak for themselves) but about the ways in which adults see those kids and why they decide to enact actions similar to those within The Wall. I mean even the imagery used in the song’s music video is purposely almost plagiarizing The Wall- it feeds into a separate analysis of the video and song outside the narrative as well- which i don’t have time right now to get into, its just very interesting that the band is bodily removed from their instruments at the end of the video and the teenagers in the audience have rendered them incapacitated (“they’re looking for a rockstar to kill” anyone?) it's the metaphorical tearing down of the wall from a completely different perspective. Anyway, the work Teenagers does for the narrative is it fits the album into the Concept Record Cinematic Universe- it is a piece that evokes the material it is influenced by to build off of the old to create the new- without it, the connections to The Wall would still be there, sure, but it wouldn’t be as complete- you cannot recontextualize the album without the foundation of Teenagers.

Teenagers is also, at its core, a subtle subversion of genre- using the blueprint of a specific kind of song to center the song within the timeline/narrative. In this case, the same way I Don’t Love You mimics and exaggerates the emotive and plaintive 80s rock ballad, Teenagers twists the classic rock of a bygone era to specifically call back on the stadium rock anthem.  Black Parade, on the whole, does this quite frequently- most of its songs take pre-existing genre cues and subverts them in ways that play off of the expected tapestry of a concept record to create individual sounding songs that seamlessly transition into one another yet remain entirely separate. It maintains their presence as scenes in a larger tapestry- specifically the fabric of the Black Parade being a morality play. This serves two purposes, it allows for this exaggeration of genre to become a motif within the work (see mama, cancer, house of wolves, i don’t love you, wttbp -> they all play with a different, varied song type/structure that is distinct from each other) and it plays off of existing genre-stereotypes in ways that contribute to the songs overall function. I Don’t Love You, for example, undermines the fundamental purposes of sappy power ballads- to express one of the two dualities of love songs: the cheesy unconditional “i will love you forever” types or the plaintive, melancholic end-of-relationship song by instead focusing on the complexity of a not-quite-finished relationship. The ballad then shifts from an expression of love to one of human loss- and the loss is less about the individual speaking, but moreso about what the other character has become - it’s a mourning not for the relationship, but for the person themselves, who they used to be in a way. It shifts from the one-dimensional view of what a ballad can achieve and instead infuses the anger, the resignation, the drama, the transformation- it humanizes a very stock genre full of platitudes and uses our expectations to create something more interesting. Similarly, Teenagers takes a tired genre and utilizes the working mechanisms of its typical song structure to subvert and repurpose those into commentary- its literally a stadium rock song that devolves into a chant. Looking at the loud drumbeat that resonates in your chest, the all together now as a command that lures the listener into singing along, the addition of more chorus vocals at the end like a crowd is shouting along, the screaming and the solo on after another like the song is falling apart a little bit, all of these elements build into a song literally meant to be infectious and replicated by the audience. Herein lies one of the songs many interpretations- humans can be easily influenced by the media they consume, the perspectives they are fed. What happens when the view that we have of adolescence is cloaked in mistrust and violence? This aspect of the song is less about the band reconciling teenagers being moved to committing acts of violence and more in analyzing how an audience can be persuaded into believing the erroneous view of teens as fundamentally destructive- are you not repeating the chorus? do teenagers not “scare the shit out of you”? Obviously the band doesn’t want you to believe this but it does what you to think about why this perspective is so common. It's a cultural subliminal message that is present in songs and tv and books that we simply do not question- it is a chant we cannot help but join in on. Teenagers is a replication of that process, but is clearly just subversive enough (both as a piece of genre and just as a song in general terms) that the listener knows its commentary and not itself propagating that viewpoint. Every song on Black Parade does this kind of “genre-bending” to make a point in some way or another, so it's a significant reason Teenagers fits into the albums cohesion.

But,Teenagers isn’t just important to the album in its sound- it lyrically parallels Disenchanted in a way that effectively moves on from Sleep without losing the album’s emotional momentum. Sleep, conceptually and lyrically, is a very heavy track- its influence from the Dune soundtrack’s Final Dream turn a cinematic, swelling piece of instrumentation into an oppressive blanket of noise that bears down on the listener and the lyrics are referential to the patient believing themselves to be irredeemable and monstrous. It's also inspired directly from Gerard’s vivid and violent night terrors during his stay at the paramour- including a recording of Gerard’s recollection of those dreams, that mentions being choked, seeing loved ones die, burning alive, etc. To transition directly from such a dark, personal subject into a reflective acoustic number about the narrator’s adolescence would be tonally inappropriate and almost laughable- it would stop the progression in its tracks, while also doing a disservice to Disenchanted. Having a break is necessary! And it's even more appropriate for that break to be a song about teenagers considering Disenchanted is so nostalgic. Additionally, Teenagers brings up a really interesting narrative thread about the Patient becoming disenchanted with the youth that then directly transitions into a song about him losing faith in his values and sense of self- they are directly correlated conceptually. Looking deeper, Disenchanted is a punk song. sort of. more specifically, it is the foundation of a punk song that becomes a ballad through narrative framing- it takes punk cliches (running from the cops, the crowds, the imagery of guillotining traitorous rich celebrities) and turns them wistful and sad because the Patient is looking back at something they no longer understand or identify with, it allows the narrative to illustrate how the Patient feels like their life was worthless and didn’t amount to much and they’re just another stupid punk kid who grew up and didn’t achieve anything. and you can’t get to this point from Sleep because it would weaken Disenchanted’s impact, make it seem insignificant and petulant in the face of Sleep’s heavy and grand sorrow. Lyrically, you need Teenagers to bridge the gap between the war metaphors and the visualizations of hell and the all-encompassing nature of cancer in order to redirect the focus to the Patient and limit the scope of the narrative at the end of the album. Teenagers, within the story, then functions as the Patient reflecting on the nature of youth and, in the wake of Mama’s “we all go to hell” rhetoric, comes to the conclusion that teenagers are wholly violent, easily manipulated, and unsympathetic. It's another step in the Patient removing his own agency and viewing his life as predestined at the same time it allows the “plot” to focus back on the more nostalgic and mundane aspects of the patient’s life. Doing so makes Famous Last Words so much more significant because it forces the Patient to reconcile with his past before he can move forward (whether that's living or dying its still applicable). so, Teenagers is very important to the overall “plot” of Black Parade- it is fundamentally necessary for the pieces to fit together.

Another larger aspect of Teenagers' importance is that it introduces the fate versus free will internal debate central to the ending fourth of the record. The song lays the foundation for this thematic idea by being about the fated violence of the youth and how they cannot help but to respond to their world with anger and cruelty. This realization about adolescence by the Patient leads to him perceiving his own youth as destructive and worthless and in following the themes of guilt/regret and damnation it's this violence that began his path to hell or his current state of suffering.  In that vein, Teenagers leads into the idea that your life is predetermined or that there is a destiny that we all have (in the Patient’s case its the absence of a future, or “a lifelong wait for a hospital stay”) and no matter what, you cannot fight that. While Mama gives a blanket statement about how "we all go to hell", Disenchanted centers the Patient's specific destiny by saying his whole life has led up to his illness and, looking further, there is the implication that life before that was retrospectively pointless. So, as previously mentioned, Disenchanted begins, structurally and lyrically, as a punk song- this sort of expression of youthful existence that, in any other song or under another faster instrumentation, would fit on some basement demo from 1986. But it doesn't stay that way, instead it actively subverts the genre it's cliches are lifted from- thinking specifically about “we ran from the cops” and the “roar of the crowd” that is juxtaposed with the change in structure  or theme. Namely, punk songs (speaking generally here) aren’t wistful because there isn't really a sense of legacy in punk music. There's history yes, but most songs are about the immediacy of emotion, not existential questioning. The retrospective nature and the shift into a ballad structure are elements reflective of a change in the main character brought on by the disillusionment present in teenagers from a punk kid to a dying young man looking back on the banality of youth and the hypocrisy, the trauma and the lack of agency. It's so much easier to think that nothing matters and the perspective makes it so much easier to give up.

This build from Teenagers into Disenchanted regarding the Patient's fate allows Famous Last Words to become an even stronger end because it's in direct opposition to that perspective. Famous Last Words is a song that screams fuck fate and fuck the past- the only thing that matters is moving forward. The image of the Patient keeping on whether he’s walking into the afterlife or continuing to stay alive as long as possible becomes something difficult, something he had to fight to achieve - he had to struggle to find a new understanding. That he can't be "afraid to keep living" or "going home" and that these are concrete actions, a use of free will. And that free will is very specifically defiant. Regardless of how you view the Patient's end, he makes the conscious decision to accept the present and move forward. We are not fated to die alone, nor is life worthless. Black Parade proves that the opposite is true, that we must grow to accept the value of life, and it's so much stronger having the Patient actively reject nihilism and apathy. Ultimately, Teenagers introduces the main thread of the final songs and without it, those songs would be narrative incomplete.

So, Teenagers has a valued place on the album sonically and within the narrative whole, that much is clear. But another reason that the album order of Sleep, Teenagers and Disenchanted is important is that none of the other material written for the album comes close to filling its place. In this case, I am going to be specifically talking about the b-sides since the demos are incomplete and we have no idea what the final version would have sounded like (but I would contend they don’t fit either). Beginning with the easiest song to discard from the narrative- My Way Home Is Through You has its moments in the lyrics but it's completely out of place musically- plus the tone is a little too hopeful for this point in the album which does not gel with Disenchanted’s hopelessness. It's also incongruent with the album since Disenchanted is effective as the only “punk” song on a record that plays with and explores genre and having this come before it would ruin the previously mentioned motif of each of the songs being individual and unique in form. Also, it really adds nothing to the fate vs free will theme- meaning its placement would weaken the disenchanted/flw combo ending. Moving forward, Kill All Your Friends seems to fit, considering its cynicism and nostalgia, but the bridge (“you’ll never get me alive, you’ll never take me alive, do what it takes to survive and I'm still here") doesn’t fit the Patient’s slow decent into apathy at all and contradicts Disenchanted’s loss of faith in the idea of living- it's too hopeful and centers survival and resilience in a way that makes it an ineffective substitute for Teenagers as a bridge song. And finally, Heaven Help Us is too religiously centered- it would refocus the fate vs free will discussion in the context of god/angels when that isn’t a theme in the album up to this point (hell is the grounded point of the album- the protagonist has already accepted their fate by Mama- having a reconciliation with a lack of faith or the absence of God seems completely out of left field when its just not an established part of the narrative) Black Parade is actually one of the mcr albums with the least references to god/angels in the heavenly religious sense- more centered around the human struggle against determinism: the usage of damnation is Catholic inspired but divorced from the division of hell vs heaven and is instead about guilt and worthiness and agency. The presence of angels or god or any divinity would simply weaken the narrative by expanding the album's focus outside its own limitations. Also, the Patient isn't ever a martyred figure, if anything he is purposely pathetic. Including any comparison of the Patient to Christ ("give you all the nails you need") or a saint unravels the key feature of the Patient's character: that he is insignificant. His insignificance and his struggles with his past actions make him a character who must find the strength to live through the guilt and pain to prove that everyone is worthy of life. The overarching purpose of Black Parade is emphasizing that no matter what we've done and how dirty we feel, we can move forward and either accept our afterlife or we can find value in being alive. Because of this contradiction, Heaven Help Us destroys the central theme of the entire album if it is included. With all of this in mind, it seems to me that the b-sides are their own nebulous thing- they don’t tonally fit on Black Parade (though I do think they fit together and are interconnected thematically) but any of them would break the flow since they seem angrier and gritter in a way that is noticeably absent and would be at odds with from a lot of Parade’s resignation. They also just do not complete the narrative, they are simple not as good as Teenagers at bringing all the pieces together.

If I still haven’t convinced you, a bonus reason Teenagers is a valuable memeber of the Black Parade tracklist, Ray was the only one who believed in the song- he called it genius (x) so listen to mr chemical romance himself telling you the song is Good and Important :)

anyway now you should, at the very least respect teenagers based on a couple thematic ideas expressed here, if not also understand why it’s imperative to black parade as an album, as well as the narrative itself. <3

[dahniwitchoflight]

man, a lot been happening on the internet lately, talking about content creators and parasocial relationships being a big topic recently

I almost don’t wanna post anything about it, cuz I’m not sure how to avoid any sort of stirring of the pot, but there’s an angle to this situation that I think a lot of people are confused about, and that’s “where does the fault lie when a person gets hurt in a parasocial relationship?”

And people I guess are thinking this is some sort of case of power dynamic’s, but I think thinking of it in these terms is incorrect to be perfectly honest

does a content creator seem to have a lot of sway over someone who’s fallen into a parasocial relationship with them? sure it can seem that way

but is that the content creator’s fault? No, as bad as that sounds to the tumblr crowd

this is NOT the power dynamic between an abusive father and their child, or a skeezy boss and their secretary, or any other real abusive power dynamic where the victim faces some sort of real consequence for not being compliant with the abuser’s wishes

this is the dynamic between a casino and someone with a gambling addiction.

can you argue that the gambling addiction/parasocial relationship wouldn’t exist without the casino/creator existing? sure you can

can you argue that it’s within the interests of the casino/content creator to get customers and fans? absolutely

but can you also say that the problem in the situation here is inherent to the person with the actual addiction problem here? someone who gets too invested in the scenario through their own desires and or addiction problems? That many people can go to a casino or be a fan of a person in a perfectly reasonable healthy amount and never get hurt or encounter any issues? Yeah

Even if you dislike the casino/creator and have hard feelings for putting you into a situation where you believed you were gonna win it all, even though the odds of that happening were never in your favor, and rightfully feel you’ve been victimized by them, the casino/creator existing and doing there thing I really don’t believe is the thing at fault here

I think there’s something to the idea that people who are vulnerable to addictions like gambling and thinking that theyll win the jackpot of millions against impossible odds is not too dissimilar from a singular fan of some content creator thinking, this is it, I’m the one theyll fall in love with over everyone else, against all the odds itll be me

and also whatever prevents them from realizing that the consequences of losing would apply to them as well, other people in the casino might lose all their savings, but it wont happen to me. Other people might get lost in the fantasy and then end up being dumped, but it wont be me

I think the brain juice would see these as very similar situations, and this addiction angle I think explains a lot for how people get into parasocial relationships in the first place and why they feel like it’s so hard to get out 

but people are still free to believe that casino’s/content creators are morally corrupt institutions, just from their nature of the fact that their livelihood depends on people and fans crowding to their type of entertainment

At the end of the day, they cannot control what their fans are going to do, they can’t read the minds of anyone who chooses to come to their establishment, they can’t know at a glance or through conversation who’s going to get addicted and who isn’t, they can only see warnings signs after the fact and then damage control, it’s just a messy reality of life that it happens

There are best practices to prevent these types of things sure but those don’t catch every case and inevitably there are going to be people who fall through the cracks anyway

the correct approach here is to mitigate the addiction problem. that’s the real thing at fault here, not any one person

so to answer the question, where does the fault lie when someone gets hurt in a parasocial relationship?

you might be a victim yes, but not a victim of the casino, as much as it can feel like that, your a victim of an unfortunate affliction

people can be dismissive and yell all they want about alcoholics being drunks, or gamblers having no spine and should just be able to not go to a casino, or people who are overinvested fans should just be able to stop back and not care about a creator so much, but I understand that it’s not that easy

but it still doesn’t make it the fault of whatever you got addicted to, It doesn’t make it anyone’s fault, and the casino/creator has less power over an addicted individual than you think, short of banning them entirely, there isn’t much they can do from their end to mitigate an individual’s behavior, I think that is something some people need to hear, I hope people don’t think I’m callous or believe that people weren’t genuinely hurt by the events that happened to them or something

but the fix to this problem doesn’t lie on the casino’s/creator’s end, it lies in mitigating the addictive disorder in the individual’s in particular’s end

this is purely speaking from someone who runs a blog and has thoughts for a fandom that once upon a time a lot of people seem really invested in, (not so much nowadays lol) 

I cannot control anyone of you, I don’t know any one of you, no matter how much I might try or get close or how close any person out there gets to me, I still can’t predict when I might encounter someone who seems overly starstruck, and in no way do I have the ability to navigate those kinds of relationships properly. I simply do not have that sort of therapeutic training and I think it’s a little bit unreasonable for people to expect that from me, despite how charismatic or not I seem like

I just have indeed had instances where another person got really overinvested in “Dahni Witch of Light”  and wanted to be in my inner circle of socialness and friends and might have been hurt when I declined that, but at the same time, I can’t do anything about that  (thankfully I’m not any sort of real popular LOL and it’s only really happened like once or twice, that I know of, since they made their feelings clear to me in private, but that’s still one or two people that might have gotten hurt)

So what does this all have to do with stuff?

I’ve read all the anecdotes about both Dan Avidan and Vinny Vinesauce, read all the docs, see all these people’s point of view, and yeah it sucks that they got hurt by the circumstances, but all that stuff meant to paint these people in a bad light? did more to me to paint them in a really good light

I saw nothing but people making sure they had the comfort and consent of everything they were involved in, doing best practices when it comes to relationships, talking about their feelings, about their expectations and also doing what they can to protect themselves and their privacy

again the worst things I saw about either of them, is danny building up the fantasy of being with a rockstar a bit too much, egging on any potential parasocial relationship issues that might have already existed, and vinny giving someone HPV (which, is debunked in of itself because that’s not how HPV works in men, even outside of vinny that’s just not how it works.)

the rest of all the stuff I saw esp in the vinny doc, was people not even accusing vinny of saying or doing anything wrong either, but miles and miles of “I assumed he was thinking x” or ”I assumed he was feeling y” and no attempts to communicate with him about any issues they had with him, because they felt awkward doing so, and instead let it fester inside them until they got hurt by it

this is not sexual assault, their mild discomfort about stuff never even happened over sexual topics, just bland things like him over-venting to them sometimes or having lowkey mental issues like being paranoid a little, this is not even being intentionally hurt by someone,  this is being bad at communicating with your partner and letting yourself endure a relationship you weren’t actually happy with, because you didn’t want to get dumped by the person you were invested in

and if you feel like you can’t honestly communicate with your partner, not because of anything they did to you, but because of your own internal conflict over how famous he is, and feeling like you’re forced to endure things you aren’t vibing with in a personal relationship

(mind you, I mean the things they said they endured in the doc which was, they didn’t like when vinny would get ranty about his friends or previous sexual encounters he had that went bad or they got weirded out because they thought he was too paranoid about stuff when they were together....which... okay so like tell him you don’t want to hear about that stuff? communicate your problems to your partner? end of story? you never even attempted that, you never even gave examples of things you thought he would do to you other than dump you if you spoke up...... which, I’m sorry, but that’s not some sort of consequence a victim faces from their abuser.... so you can’t even say he would have had a bad reaction, especially when you give examples of him doing exactly the opposite, apologizing for things that made other people uncomfortable WHEN theyve actually communicated to him that they were uncomfortable with it)

 -Those are signs that you are too overinvested and too parasocially invested with a person to have an honest relationship with them

like, heck these things aren’t even unique to partnerships, you should be able to communicate when anyone around you is making you uncomfortable, even friends, but if you can’t and the only reason you can’t is because of a parasocial investment in that person, that’s not healthy on your end

Danny sure seems to have been a little bit at fault for building up the fantasy of catching feelings for a famous dude when he intended one night stands, is that the best way to have navigated the situation? No probably not, but to a person who doesn’t have a parasocial relationship with him, this behavior would just be disappointing when the fantasy fizzled out, it’s not inherently harmful

after that point, if after the fact a person who had any sort of interaction with them felt hurt by the experience, there honestly is not much more a content creator could have done to mitigate that, in fact Vinesauce I think seems at least more aware of the parasocial thing and tried more strongly to vet the people he was with to not be those kind of people, but again people aren’t mind readers and nothing will ever be foolproof like that, and I guess some people even took him trying to vet that kind of behavior as hurtful in and of itself, (they took him venting about previous parasocial relationships he had and how paranoid and upsetting they were to him, and took it as some sort of threat against them personally, like they were trying to mindgame what exactly he was telling them, assuming he was saying something else that he wasn’t, which, is assumptions that live entirely in their own minds) but I’m just sitting here like, what else could they have done?

I get that people who had sexual relationships with these people could come away feeling really awful about it, feeling manipulated or duped in some way, but what else could have been done to prevent that from happening other than the people in question just, never interacting with anyone? Which is not a realistic solution, and doesn’t fix the problem of the victim in question moving on and getting starstruck by someone else and having it happen it all over again

If these people want to make friends, want to make relationships with anyone, want to have casual sex, want to have any sort of human connection, there unfortunately gonna have to sort the people they encounter into two different groups, people who have parasocial relationships with them and people who don’t, (and this is NOT people are fans of them and people who are not, you can be a fan and not get caught into the parasocial thing) and it is impossible to get this correct in every single individual social experience that theyre gonna have with every single individual human being, regardless if it’s a sexual relationship or not

in conclusion, I really do hope the people who were hurt by all this can truly heal and move on eventually from this, in no way am I trying to lessen their experiences, but I really don’t think other people deserved to be hung from the gallows over this, it’s no one person’s fault, neither the fan’s or the content creator’s, it’s just a messy interpersonal situation

I believe the correct thing to do is spread awareness about the warnings signs that you might be falling into a parasocial relationship, more effort needs to be put into what this looks like, what it feels like, how to avoid it, how to mitigate it, and how to regulate the very real feelings of love and affection someone might have for a person they see all the time in media but don’t have a real connection with, with the understanding of yeah, if you really can’t enter a casino without losing your life savings, a very real conversation needs to be had if you should even be entering these casino’s/watching their content at all

[lofi-tophat]

Let’s talk about the 70s punk scene and HWS England

I sometimes feel that the fandom doesn’t give England’s love for punk/rock music much justice. Some authors usually write about this human AU in which Arthur wants to be a rockstar and some others plainly avoid the topic whatsoever. Which is a pity because I actually believe the whole character has a deep punk reference, specially regarding appearence (might expand on this in another post but basically, for me, England seems like some random bushy browed anime 70s punk guy who suddenly has to put on a suit and attend world meetings, which is both fascinating and hilarious).

So I thought maybe we could dive a bit into very general punk history and then I’d like to share with you some hc regarding England’s involvement with punk culture in general (if you just want to read the hcs just scroll down to the last paragraph with the bullet ponts).

My experience in punk stuff is actually that I’m kind of a metalhead lol. Metalheads and punks had and probably still have a deeply-rooted rivalry. However, punk influenced metal a lot, and metal also influenced punk. So I stumbled upon many punk facts while browsing about my favorite metal bands. 

Take this as historical hetalia... but counterculture historical hetalia :D (which is something we need more in the fandom, btw, I know military history is cool but its also cool how humans expressed themselves through art, fashion and music when they felt the pressure of authority and the frustration of society).

Historical context

Let’s return a bit in time and remember the 60s. The 60s were this blessed time in which people tried to defeat the establishment with peace and love. The hippie movement is from this decade and it influenced a lot on how people thought and behaved. In terms of counterculture, I must say this is a fascinating time in history (I recently discovered psychodelic science and its so incredible what was being talked back then).

Anyways, although a lot of young people were into this discourse of love and peace, some weren’t really that happy about it. In Europe, the post-war situation was sad and a lot of young people either were jobless or had the shittiest jobs you could imagine. Politics were also depressing. This was the origin not only for punk but also for other genres of heavy music, such as metal: People who didn’t want to be all happy and peaceful and had the need to express their frustration and anger, shouting about how society was fucked up. They needed an outlet.

Origins of punk

The origins of punk music are actually not quite clear. In fact, the US and the UK both claim that punk music was born in their country. Funnily enough, my country also claims to be the origin of punk (I’ll leave this mini-doc for you. Sadly, I don’t think this is a correct claim, mainly because their music was in spanish and I doubt that major punk bands took them as reference. Its a cool band tho).

I have to side with americans on this: The arguments for the american origins of punk are quite solid. The Ramones were the first actual punk band out there. They were active since 1974. Their music had all the elements of punk and, chronologically, they were the first ones performing this type of sound.

However, they didn’t have the aesthetic. That actually was a british invention. American punk had still leather jackets, jeans and sneakers. British punk? Well, remember all those ripped pants and shirts you commonly associate with punk? Yes, those were the Sex Pistols all along. They were the ones introducing the attitude and the style. The Pistols had some insane performances and a huge shock-value that can’t be found in early american punk. So you can safely say that your image of what a punk is is based mainly on the Pistols (also, for singing anti-authoritarian lyrics, they actually were managed by some dude who had a fashion shop. So yeah...).

Punk attitude or philosophy or whatever

The reason why I addressed the rockstar thing at the start of the post is because I find it curious. Punk is characterized by the whole Do It Yourself attitude and breaking with the establishment. Anarchism in punk is scandalizing people since there is no authority whatsoever. There wasn’t really any deep philosophy behind all of this, nor any political movement. Punk has nothing to do with a formal anarchist philosophy (which actually exists and has nothing to do with disorder). However, punk is characterized by the anti-establihsment lyrics. Remember, this is all about scandalizing people (which sometimes took great lengths). Presentations from british punk bands were also quite wild those days. They involved a lot of insults, spitting and, of course, pogo.

So, it is obvious that there is this deep concern about turning into a sellout, a pretty common fear in any underground scene. Authenticity was encouraged. Aspiring rockstars really didn’t have much mercy in the community so to speak, at least in this specific period. 

I would also like to add how punk had other aspects beside the music. For example, fanzines were pretty popular in the punk scene in the 70s and a great way to engage with what was going on with bands and music. I remember also this interview of this band in which they remembered how a very high guy decided to recite his poem while the band was playing. So, yeah, literature, illustration, fashion and other stuff were involved in the punk scene too.

British punk was also characterized by a very nihilistic attitude and a total disregard for previous influences. 1977, a song by The Clash, stated:

No Elvis, Beatles, or the Rolling Stones!

Now, for the important stuff: The music. Punk music is all about being simple. Punk musicians aren’t really known for their virtuosity in their instruments, something that actually inspired musicians from a lot of heavy bands later. In fact, the famous Sid Vicious from the Sex Pistols never could learn how to play the bass. So the band disconnected his instrument from the amplifier and he only had to pretend to play. The guy actually tried to learn how to play bass but music wasn’t exactly his talent. He had tons of punk attitude though, and that was the reason why his band didn’t kick him out. 

Vocals are usually shouted, the rythm is fast and the riffs are quite simple. In fact, there is this famous publication on a 1976 british fanzine that stated:

This is a chord

This is another

This is a third

Now form a band

HWS England and the 70s punk scene and onwards 

Thanks to his immortality, it is obvious that England had to experience the 70s in all their glory (what a lucky bastard). Was he there? Hell yes. As I explained before in some of my hc posts, nations represent the population more than their Government, so I really believe that England felt the frustration from that post-wwii decade and he probably also felt pissed about this. Working for the Government must have felt really frustrating during those years. 

In the past, he probably would have tried to take his ship and sail the seas or whatever, but that was not possible in the modern era. I guess that’s how he discovered punk. 

Now, rock existed in England before punk. I mean, the Beatles, duh. So Arthur wouldn’t have been completely ignorant about rock music in general. Contrary to popular belief I don’t imagine him being that much of a beatlemaniac though. Sure he likes them, but the music didn’t resonated with him as much. But boy, that first time he heard the Pink Fairies in 1971 (Yes, this was an actual band, a proto-punk band)? Yeah, he could relate more to that.

More detailed stuff here:

Pubs were crucial for the development of punk music. They were these spaces in which bands could play, a venue to discover new music. Yes, Arthur must have been a regular in a lot of these pubs.

Fanzines probably fascinated Arthur as an outlet for his own writings and silly drawings. He probably created a cringey pseudonym and collaborated with a lot of them. 

Its canon that England likes to critic american movies, and, taking from there, I think he’s the type of guy that has an opinion for everything. So I can imagine him also writing about what bands he enjoyed and what bands sucked.

Yeah, I can also see him being drunk and just reciting a poem while some rock band played behind.

With some ability, and a lil bit of tricks, Arthur could escape normal Government activities and perform with punk bands at nights. People were so into the music that he had no problem passing by.

Some cover art in CDs show Enlgland with a guitar and a bass (yes, not many people remember the bass cover art). So he probably plays both guitar and bass. He also probably plays the drums. Of course, he’s no virtuoso and he only knows the most basic stuff in those three instruments. I can see him being into songwriting tho.

Music equipment:

Guitar: Definetely a Telecaster

Bass: Fender P-bass and I can also see him having a Rickenbacker 4001

All these instruments are full with stickers. Punk instruments look really cool btw. (I wish my bass could look like those I see in certain punk bands)

England’s probably the kind of guy that doesn’t cut his strings at the head of his guitar.

He can actually play guitar/bass and sing at the same time.

England plays bass with a pick (what an asshole, we bassists know picks are not allowed)

Contrary to popular belief, I can see England appreciating good rock music from other countries and supporting them. He probably insists that punk music was born in the UK though.

1977: The Queen was going to celebrate her silver jubilee. And England had no problem with this. He really had none... but he HAD to be in that boat trip with the Sex Pistols. There’s no way he was going to miss that. He later had to explain his abscence that day to his Government officials (Btw, my hc for England’s relationship with his monarchy is “It’s complicated”. I can explain this later. Just remember that he was really pissed those days)

I can see Arthur in general being really involved with the scene. A lot of the stuff they were making actually matches with his canon interests and even personality. So he probably enjoyed those days and felt quite at home. I can even say that, for a long time, he hadn’t felt that kind of connection with his own people.

Although I can see England being attracted by the nihilism in the scene, I think his romanticism protects him from embracing it fully.

England had to live a double-life during this era. Not that it was new for him.

Arthur was pierced several times by some random, drunk teenagers. He doesn’t remember who tho. He was also drunk. Obviously his piercings close really fast, unless he has a permanent jewel in there.

I can actually see England expanding his music taste. Although punk is in his heart, it wouldn’t be strange for me that he’s overall a rock nerd and enjoys other genres, specially those with fast drum beats and heavy riffs. So I can see him having some metal favorites too, having a certain taste for prog rock and even digging into hardcore.

I’m still unsure if England would have been a massive Pistols fan as fanfics usually portray him. I mean, maybe? I would say he is definetely into acts such as the Pink Fairies (I mean, c’mon, its perfect). The Clash and the Damned probably also have a place in his heart.

After the punk scene dried out (the 80s weren’t that great for punk music although it was the birth of even heavier forms of music based on punk), England also was eager about the new genres flourishing during these times based on punk. Acts like folk punk might have had an appeal for him. He’s also fond of the punk-ish bands from the 90s like Green Day.

“Punk will never die!” shouted England while stage diving in some random small concert. He likes to support new bands these days.

The most fascinating thing, maybe in a more poetic sense, is that England’s immortality probably also helps him to keep up a punk spirit as much as his nationhood allows him, instead of aging poorly and angry like a lot of punk musicians... I mean, he aged poorly, but for other reasons lmao.

[blazehedgehog]

You hear about Dan from Game Grumps? What is it about popular Youtubers that they always turn out to be toxic or sex pests? (not saying you're one)

Man, I dunno.

I suppose on some level it’s just, like... “youtuber culture” is still pretty new in the grand scheme of things. Youtube as a platform is only a little over 15 years old and the modern Youtube we know today is hasn’t even been around for a decade. I mean, Pewdiepie’s channel was started in 2010, and his “rise to fame” only really happened in maybe the last seven years. So this is all deeply, deeply in its infancy. There’s a lot of long-long-term structural concepts yet to be figured out.

I think a lot of the people who got famous or are getting famous are probably the weird social outcasts, right. Instead of following the “traditional path” to stardom through TV and movies, they set up in lonely basements and closets and hit it big on a burgeoning platform. Suddenly they have all of this fame and power and they... don’t know how to use it responsibly. Some of these Youtube stars are still technically children by the time they’re millionaires and they made this money thanks to some nebulous parasocial relationship that people have with them. There’s obviously some very warped perspectives coming out of that.

Danny from Game Grumps (different from Dan Ryckert, pictured above) is over 40 years old, mind you, and was famous enough that he went on tours with bands before joining Game Grumps, but I think some of that is still applicable. It’s the rockstar problem, right. Rockstars are in to drugs, and booze, and lead lives of substance abuse, because that kind of thing is everywhere for them. It’s embedded in to the lifestyle to some extent. In order for you to network with certain types of people in that profession, you have to engage in certain kinds of behavior.

Youtubers exist in this hugely weird space where people will “ship” different Youtubers together romantically. Way back during the Jontron days, Game Grumps might be the first place where I actually became aware of this, because there were entire tumblrs dedicated to pairing everyone off. And there were obviously those people out there like, “hey, don’t ship real people” -- but that never stopped anyone.

And now you have these kids out there that are 15 or 16 years old, deep in the weirdness of puberty, ingesting this kind of stuff and asking themselves questions they aren’t in a clear place to answer responsibly. It’s a dangerous, precarious road for anyone to be on.

It creates the perfect storm where broken, predatory dudes feel emboldened to perpetuate abuse with very little effort. Who’s going to stop them? They are invincible celebrities, operating with toxic ideas of normal. So, they try to get away with it, because they’re “just that cool.” It's fame poison.

You also have to consider that maybe Youtube attracts a certain kind of person. The real mega-celebrities bank on all kinds of bad practices because that’s expected for the platform. By that I mean like, real burn-your-bridges kind of stuff, like clickbait tactics, right. Obnoxious thumbnails, sensationalist video titles, and a non-stop output of whatever’s quick, cheap, and gets people to click. Everyone likes to talk about folks like PragerU and Alex Jones and how they twist the truth and amplify hate to boost their viewership, but they’re just playing in to a larger problem that effects all of Youtube. It’s just a lot of the channels that engage in this stuff aren’t pushing a hateful message along with it, so nobody really thinks it’s so bad. But it’s not a healthy ecosystem, and being able to gain big success and popularity in that environment means you have to be okay with a certain kind of deception.

And it’s turning in to this custom-built disaster machine, where anyone with any kind of big time popularity did so by crushing lots of wonderful, undeserving people under their boots. And Youtube, as a company and as a platform, is doing nothing to stop them.

[hideawayintheimaginationworld]

Rachel-eve-puppet here! Changed username! I would die for some fluff with Matt and Spring Jr!

This life was more tiring, boring.

Matt had a 12-kilogram weight named Spring JR strapped to his leg.

An annoying condition, the bear robot, Lefty had that was nonnegotiable; was Matt being present for it. Like he had a choice, Lefty was ready to withdraw everything he had given whenever he wanted.

It was easy to make him happy but also easy to piss him off.

“What are you doing?”

He turned his attention from his laptop, he saw the little bear, Helpy looking at him curiously, he wondered if Lefty had left him here deliberately because he didn’t trust him, he knew Helpy couldn’t force him into things like Lefty but Helpy certainly looked like a tattletale.

“Nothing important to you,” Matt dismissed him, waving his hand in “shoo” gesture, preferring to be left alone.

It appeared Helpy didn’t understand, he just stood still, he watched Matt's hand but stayed still, Matt then repeated the gesture and said “Shoo! Go away!” for good measure.

Helpy didn’t move, but he had seen what Matt was looking at because he stepped forward and closed his laptop screen immediately.

“You're not supposed to be looking at that.”

“Why??” Matt asked him, “You're so worried about your secrets getting out??”

“No, because with the technology you're using, Fazbear Entertainment can track your IP and confirm your identity, and they will make you disappear,” Helpy emphasised the last part with a serious face and a flat tone, something about it was unnerving considering Helpy was like a Care Bear.

“And they will do it quick enough so you can’t talk,” Helpy snapped his finger, “They get suspicious of people who search up that stuff, please reframe from doing so.”

Matt didn’t think about that, Lefty said it would drive him insane and he shouldn’t be looking it up, he didn’t know they could potentially track him to the house.

Helpy clapped his hand together, “Since you aren’t working... how about spending time with your son?”

“I don’t view it as my son.”

“Yes, I think it's weird too, but technically you were the incubator for him, which is technically what a pregnancy is.”

Matt narrowed his eyes.

“Yes, yes I know you hate that term, but the kids only laughed at it for three days then they lost interest... they didn’t laugh at what happened to you, they laughed at the concept of it....” Helpy walked away then turned and said, “So what can you and Springle do?”

“Exist in two different rooms?” Matt suggested sounding hopeful.

“Painting! Ooh, I love painting! Has Spring ever done finger painting?”

“No, that's messy.”

“That's why we have something called outside... I can set it up! You just need to get Spring,” Helpy walked away.

Matt was irritated Helpy didn’t offer to get Spring JR himself, he was capable, he just didn’t want to, or rather Lefty told him he shouldn’t do that.

Spring JR was easy to locate, he was in his toddler bed, half asleep, he immediately perked up when he saw the door open, he looked even more excited to see Matt.

Matt brought him downstairs, Helpy had come out of the kitchen and looked at Matt before walking upstairs, he was probably seeing if Matt was actually holding Spring JR right, Matt once said he'd lift him by his ears and Lefty countered saying if he ever saw him doing that, he'd break his coffee mug and force him to drink coffee out of a bowl.

Helpy came back, pulling a box of things behind him, then lifting it, slowly coming down the stairs, then he stood next to Matt. “Outside,” He said then walked into the kitchen, directly to the door that led outside, he placed down the box, he stood up and pulled the door handle down, opening the door, he shoved it open and turned, pulling the box outside.

It wasn’t much, considering Lefty liked having a peaceful enclosed space outside, it was still nice. They were on the deck that Lefty and Rockstar Foxy built, which was under the shade. The deck had two areas to sit, Helpy walked towards the rounded table with six chairs, bringing the items with him.

Matt followed him, still holding Spring JR, Helpy pulled out one of the chairs, he used it as a step, putting the box on the table, Helpy then turned to Matt, “Come on and sit!”

Matt decided it was less of a pain to just do what he said.

Matt sat down, Spring JR was in his lap, Helpy opened the box and pulled out some items, he then paused, “Probably need to cover the table with something, I'm sure Lefty will hate me if the table gets messy.”

“He'd probably blame me.”

“You know you kind of remind me of a more sour Greg,” Helpy pulled a large grey material square out of the box.

“How exactly?”

“Greg thinks a lot of things are his fault, it isn’t his fault and neither is what happened to you,” Helpy placed down the box so he could put down the material over the table.

“Why did that feel like a lie?” Matt asked him.

“It wasn’t!” Helpy exclaimed shaking his head, “The problem is... I'll be honest Matt, you're kind of unlikeable... but you can improve! Everyone improved...”

“Even Lefty's favourite Alec?”

“Lefty doesn’t have favourites,” Helpy automatically answered pushing the material flat.

“Then why does he spend so much time with him?”

“Alec chooses to.”

“But why?”

Helpy looked up at him, “You haven’t been paying attention?”

Matt was silent.

Helpy sighed and placed down the paint tubes on the table, “Alec was alone, he was scared after what happened to him.”

“He was turned into a teddy bear, right?”

“Not quite, he was body swapped... like in the movie Freaky Friday. Lonely Freddy stole his identity... Alec was too scared to ask for help anyway... but when he was finally discovered, Lefty made a promise to him, that no matter what, he was going to get him back to his body... and well when it was just me, Lefty and Alec, we did everything we could to show him a bad experience doesn’t shape his life,” Helpy looked at the tube of yellow paint like he was checking how much there was before placing it down.

“Lefty never said this,” Helpy continued talking, “But I think he just grew attached to Alec after a while, he was use to seeing him every day, and eventually, Alec was also used to the life he had, I think he was okay as long as Lefty was there.”

“So Alec decided after he got his body back to get up and leave his family?” Matt asked, he knew Alec and Hazel's parents were still alive but they weren’t even mentioned at any point.

“Not quite,” Helpy answered, “It wasn’t easy... his parents never provided him with the emotional care he needed, and Lefty did, Lefty thought just because he was the way he was, it didn’t mean he should be sad... I could tell after everything, Alec was just conflicted, he wanted to stay with Lefty but he didn’t know if he could... it's similar to you, Lefty doesn’t want you to be sad either.”

“I’m not sad.”

“You're angry because you are sad, Lefty doesn't know exactly how to approach you, that was the same for Alec, Greg, Millie, and Devon, Lefty wants to respect distance by not getting in your face but he wants you to remember you can always come to talk to him if you want to, one experience can make or break someone, don’t let this break you.”

“I'm... I’m okay.”

“Doesn’t sound like it, why don’t you express the frustrations with painting?” Helpy suggested, he got up on the table and placed some paper in front of him, he then walked away and took his seat.

“Springy!” Helpy called his attention, “Watch!”

Helpy took a tube of paint and squirted some on the paper, he then placed down his hand, he smeared it over the paper, he then lifted it to show Spring JR, “Fun!”

Spring JR made an “Ooooh” noise, Helpy didn’t seem to care he had gone to the level of a child now.

Helpy nodded, “Yes! Why don’t you paint a lovely picture? What colour do you want? We haven’t got any purple but I can mix it using red and blue!”

“Green! Green!” Spring JR said.

Helpy held up the green tube of paint, “Here! Have fun!”

“He's going to make a mess,” Matt warned him how messy young kids could be.

“Yes, but it'll be a fun mess!” Helpy nodded.

Spring JR seem to test the technique Helpy used, he smeared it almost the same way, he stared for it for a minute then started smacking the paint in the page with his hands, creating an imprint.

Then he moved on, trying his own thing, Matt watched him draw a circle with the green on another piece of paper, he then turned it into a smile by pressing two dots and drawing a curved line.

“Ooh, that's pretty,” Helpy said, “Why don’t you take an interest?”

“Okay then, what are you painting?” Matt asked.

“I'm painting a fox,” Helpy replied.

“Foxes don’t have pink on them,” Matt spoke a matter of fact seeing the fact Helpy was adding pink on.

“They can in painting, reality doesn’t apply!” Helpy replied scratching in some pink over the muzzle of the fox he drew, “Have some fun Matt! Your son enjoys it!”

Matt looked at the colours, he took the pale blue colour, he poured some into the middle of his palm, he spread it over his whole hand, then he pressed it down on a blank page, leaving his handprint, now Helpy couldn’t argue he wasn’t contributing.

Spring looked curious at the handprint.

Then he pressed his own against it.

Matt immediately realised.

The little shit.

“Hey don’t do that! You ruin your own things!”

“No! No! He didn’t! It looks nice!” Helpy immediately said.

Matt's anger immediately burnt out, it was the quickest his anger ever died. Matt looked at the page, seeing his handprint with Spring JR's pressed in the middle, in the end, it was just a little handprint.

Father and Son.

He remembered that day.

Just being uncomfortable.

Now it had come to this day and this lifestyle.

Spring JR turned his head to look up at him, almost like he was waiting for a response.

“Don’t ever change...” Matt said speaking honestly, not looking forward to him being a teenager at some point, at least he was playful at this point and not angry.

Spring JR poked his tongue out, laughed and reached out his hands, Matt forgot about his paint soaked hands until he pressed them against his cheeks.

Well, two can play at that game.

Matt pressed the tip of his nose with one finger, leaving a blue dot on his little black nose.

Helpy watched, intrigued, not making a single sound, he watched the back to back responses, just naturally occurring, it was like Helpy didn’t exist and this was just them, Matt actually having his anger cancelled out by Spring JR existence.

It was a step forward in the right direction.

Helpy took that as a cue to leave and make himself a cup of tea, leaving the father and son alone for a few minutes.

A few minutes of bonding.

[theyreonlynoodlesmike]

HI IM NEW AND I LOVE YOUR STUFF Anyways, would you be willing to do a Non-binary so for the boys (poly or separate, up to you) who's more punk and grunge Alt than got or metal alt? I'm Non-binary and there's just not a lot of stuff (for any fandom not just tlb) that I can actually read as "yep, I'm the reader/yn/self insert". If not that's cool, whatever you feel comfortable with man. ~🐍

Oh, I can totally do this!! I hope you enjoy this fic, and honestly if you ever want to request anything else just specify that you want nonbinary pronouns and you got it!!

Poly!Lost Boys x Nonbinary!S/O

The boys are old. They still remember when pink was considered a more masculine color and when blue was considered more feminine. Gender roles have changed over the past century or so, as have people's expression of their gender identity. The older they've gotten, the more that they've realized how much of a unique experience it is for each person

So, when they meet you, the boys are a little confused. They know that you're different, from them and from other people. You were more punk and alternative, and the only one that resembled your fashion was Marko. He started up a conversation with you by complimenting your pins and patches, and he asked what the homemade pin that said "They/Them" was about. The boys all have a fluid sexuality, but their issue was that they didn't really know where to place you. When you told them you were nonbinary, and weren't meant to fit into any usual definition of masculine or feminine, it started to make a little bit more sense

"Like David Bowie?" Paul asked, and that earned him a quick slap on the back of the head from Dwayne. Luckily, you laughed. You explained that Bowie was more androgynous, and that non-binary was your gender. The boys hummed, but the only one that seemed to really understand was Dwayne. Later that night, he told you that he knew about two-spirit people, and he was the first one to be able to seamlessly shift into using your pronouns

You became friends, and soon something else, with them shortly after meeting them, and the boys really aren't phased by your identity. To them, it's just who you are

David would ask questions from time to time, mainly about how you figured it out, if the name you went by now was your birth name, and if anyone in your life was a little less accepting. You saw the glint in his eyes, and, whether you knew what they were or not, you knew to fudge the details a bit with the last question (unless you wanted certain family members to disappear). While getting used to using your pronouns, he would just say your name a lot instead. He can't mess up if he just says your name, and he likes saying it a lot anyways. He calls you "kitten" as he doesn't think it's a gendered term, and whenever someone asks he just says, "We're dating." Instead of labelling you. He thinks it's a little bit more direct anyways. That way, no one gets confused about what you two are to eachother

Dwayne doesn't ask a lot of questions, mainly because he doesn't want you to think that it's the only interesting thing about you. It's not the center of your personality, and he's not going to treat it like it is. It's just a fact of who you are, like how he has brown hair or his own gender identity. If you do want to talk about it, he's all ears to listen however. He's by far the most knowledgeable on the subject, and it didn't take him any effort to refer to you as your preferred pronouns. Though, he was a little stumped when you started dating. He didn't know how to introduce you or what to call you, and eventually he just asked you. You told him that "princex" worked, as he'd once slipped and had started to call you a gendered variant of the word. He smiles after you tell him, and it's falling out of his lips almost more than your name. He also ended up introducing you as his "significant other" to those that ask

Paul is a chatty boy and he asks the most amount of questions. In fact, a lot of the questions are repeats of ones he's already asked. He's just as accepting as the others, he's just a little confused. Dwayne has to hit him upside the head sometimes just to remind him that there are other things to talk about. But he thinks it's totally rad! He compares you to rockstars all the time, and honestly? It's a little refreshing to see someone be so positive about it. Paul has a tendency to slip up sometimes, just a little bit more than any of the others. He's a motormouth, and usually he'll already be onto the next sentence before he even realizes he's used the wrong pronouns or lumped you in by saying "the boys". Even if you assure him that it's okay, he still layers on the apologies. He ends up calling you "sugar" and he teasingly introduces you as his "lover" to people that ask. It usually earns him a punch in the shoulder, especially with how he says the word suggestively each and every time

Marko thinks it's totally punk that you don't adhere to the binary. He thinks it's very "fuck the system" of you, even if you explain that it's just the way you feel inside. Still, he's ready to learn and, after dating you for awhile, he knows just as much as Dwayne does. He becomes familiar with other genders and communities in the LGBT, and soon you wonder if he knows more than you do. He goes with you to all the LGBT friendly places in Santa Carla, and he wonders out loud how he's never wandered into any of these places. He gets hit on a lot at the local bars, but he'll tug you closer and seamlessly introduce you as his "partner". He likes the term, mainly because it reminds him of "partners in crime". Which, you are. He calls you "babe", as it's perfectly non-gendered and flows out easily

A random person is giving you trouble? They'll totally beat the shit out of them and, maybe, even make them tonight's dinner. God forbid anyone purposely misgenders you. Paul can only grab Marko so fast, and it doesn't help that David is right there besides him

Bathrooms are an issue? Well, as it was the 80s, gender neutral bathrooms didn't really exist unless you wanted to hit a porta-potty. If you do, they'll totally use mind-tricks on the line so you don't have to wait. If you'd prefer to use one of the ones provided on the beach, they'll mind-trick everyone out of it so you can have the entire thing to yourself. No one can bother you if you're alone

The boys will lend you their clothes if you want them, but only if you want them. They're less likely to push just because they know how you dress is a big part of your gender expression, and they'll do their best not to seem too pleased whenever you do borrow something of theirs

Overall, they're very supportive boyfriends and they love you because you're you

[extremelyblackandwhite]

i wanna know what love is - 30

Pairing: rockstar! sebastian stan x writer!reader

Warnings: fluff

A/N: y/n’s exit is definetely inspired by peggy olson. the next chapter is the last one and i’m very emotional. enjoy xx

Last Chapter // Next Chapter

It had been the best first weeks of her life. She had her own little office space, had people who’d come to criticise her work instead of asking her to proof read theirs, people would listen to her, people would even allow her to decide what topic to write. It was her dream come true, somewhere she could grow without being stunted. However, her heart was still broken, she was doing everything to ignore thinking about Sebastian or even hearing about him. She had given her article to Rolling Stone, remembering that she had promised Sebastian to help clean up his imagine, he deserved that at least.

She returned to her flat around night-time, tired yet pleased with today’s work. Y/N opened the door to see her grandfather sat on her coach. Suddenly she regretted giving her mother one of her flat’s keys just in case. He was probably here to tell her that he was right about Sebastian and that she should have gone with who he thought was better for them. In reality, none of them sounded like a good idea right now.

     - Your mother told me you got the New Yorker job. - he started before Y/N could even close the door behind her. - I just wanted to congratulate you on it. I know you always wanted it.

    - I thought you were here to talk about how right you were about Sebastian. 

    - I’m actually here to talk about Sebastian. - he spoke, patting the seat near him. Y/N sighed, it wasn’t like she could kick her grandfather out, she wasn’t heartless. She took a place near him. - Your mother also told me you two aren’t together anymore.

    - You were right about Sebastian, he doesn’t want to be with me. I don’t think he actually ever wanted to be with me.

    - No, darling. I was wrong, I was wrong about him. He is a good man, a good man who loves you. Trust me, I really wanted him to be a bad guy because that meant I could introduce you to someone who could provide to you but the thing is, you don’t need no one to provide to you. You have your own home, you made it on your own. - he held her hands. - I heard him on the phone with the New Yorker back in Maryland asking them to look at your university articles.

    - But he said ... - her mind seemed to shut. It couldn’t be true, she had read the magazine, he had ignored her once they got back to the bus. He’d stopped calling her a day right after she stopped answering him, she’d even heard rumours he was back to his womaniser behaviour. - I read it in the magazine.

    - You’re a writer, not everything writers write is truth. - he patted her on the shoulder. - You don’t need a perfect relationship, those don’t exist, darling. You need a relationship where both parts love each other and push each other to be better. You’ve always pushed everyone around you to be better and by making that call, he’s forcing you to be a better professional. 

    - He’s not the man you want me to bring home.

    - But at the end of the day, he is the man you want to bring home. 

He hadn’t stayed longer but after he left his words were still tattooed on her mind. She had read the words, he hadn’t even tried to explain them to her but on another point of view she had also not tried to get into contact with him, she had been an impulse driven woman scared to get heartbroken again.

She picked her phone from her wallet, going through her contacts and finding Mary’s number. She still talked to her, messaging her ever so often under the rule that Sebastian’s name wouldn’t be mentioned. She pressed the phone symbol, hearing the phone ring until the very familiar voice of the redhead came through. 

   - Look if it isn’t the big shot writer. How are you, lovely?

   - Can I speak with Sebastian? - she said before she lost the courage.

   - Aw, darling. He’s not touring with us anymore, he quit early. 

   - Do you know where I can find him?

   - I don’t know. Fred thinks he might be in Brooklyn but we don’t know exactly where. 

   - Alright, thank you.

   - Wait, you are not gonna skim the entirety of Brooklyn to look for Sebastian. I know you live by the Upper Side which is relatively easy to navigate but Brooklyn isn’t.

   - We’ll I’m gonna try. It can’t be hard. 

Good thing about working for the New Yorker was that she had access to fact checkers who found it very odd that the new kid was already asking for favours but they decided to help her out. There were 10 people with the same name as him and same age range on the Brooklyn area. She quickly got into a taxi which drove her to Brooklyn. She decided to do the rest of the walk on foot as the addresses weren’t too far apart from each other. The first 9 ones had been a disappointment with people who definitely weren’t Sebastian. The final house didn’t even answer leaving her to sit on the sidewalk.

This had all been her fault, if she had been a rational being which she always had pride herself in being none of this would have happened if she had decided to maybe storm into his bedroom and demand an explanation. 

  - Excuse me, darling. - she tilted her head from the floor to see an old woman staring at her. - The second hand shop down the street, back when he was a kid he used to sell a lot of stuff to it, maybe they know where he lives.

  - Thank you. - she gave her a kind smile clutching down her wallet as she walked to the second hand shop. She opened the door, a bell ringing as she entered. A man standing behind the checkout looked at her, he was probably in his mind sixties, busy polishing a hunting knife. Y/N gave him her “I don’t mean harm smile” and walked up to him, eyes particularly fixed on a old beaten up guitar hanged on the wall. It wasn’t exactly something you’d hang there. - Hi, a lady on the street told me you could possibly help me.

  - It depends, sweetheart. - he stopped polishing his knife. - What do you need? 

  - She told me you could possibly tell me where to find Sebastian Stan? - she knew she probably sounded like a crazy fan but she didn’t mind. She was tired, all Y/N wanted to do was to find him so she could try and explain why she acted the way she acted. 

  - It depends, sweetheart. What can you give me? - Y/N sighed, opening her wallet, she only had 30 pounds which she slammed on the ground. - I know where his mum lives. 

She knew Sebastian and his mum weren’t in the best of terms but she could possibly know where his place was. Besides, he had met her family so maybe she could ask his mother about him. The man scribbled an address on a piece of paper, sliding it up to her. 

  - Why do you have that broken up guitar hanged on the wall? - she asked as she looked at the address, making sure she wasn’t being scammed.

  - Belonged to the person you’re looking for, sweetheart. - Y/N’s ears perked up. She should do something nice and she remembered how much he would smile when speaking about that guitar. - 100 dollars.

  - No way, it’s broken up besides I just gave you 30 dollars, that’s all I have.

  - Those are some nice earrings you have there. Real diamonds?

  - The earrings for the guitar and a bag. - Y/N negotiated, bringing her hand to her ears to pull the earrings off, placing them on the balcony. - That’s my last offer.

He shrugged, handing her the guitar on the bag. She placed it over her chest like a cross bag and rushed out of the store. Y/N put the address on her phone and started to walk to Sebastian’s mum’s place. She suddenly despised the fact that she had decided not to change out of her work clothes and looked like an absolute fool.

After a few minutes of walking in the most uncomfortable heels ever created, she reached a small apartment whose door luckily was opened by a man who was already coming in. She entered the lift pressing the 5th floor wondering about what to say to his mother. What was she supposed to say, “Hi I left your son because of my stupid behaviour”? No. 

Anyway, she didn’t have enough time as she found herself knocking on the door which was opened by a woman who had the same eyes as Sebastian’s, she would recognise those eyes everywhere.

  - Hi, darling. You’re alright? - she asked in a very soft and kind tone of voice.

  - I’m sorry to be bothering, I know it’s late. I just ... I really need to speak with Sebastian. Do you know where he is?

  - SEBASTIAN! There’s a girl here for you. - she turned her head to face the inside of the house, calling out for her son, surprising Y/N. Had they finally made up? - Quick, now. 

  - What? - Y/N saw his head peaking through the door. He placed his hand on the door, pushing it wide open, his expression tense. - Wiley, what are you doing here?

  - I need to speak with you. - she pulled on her nail, eyes on her heels as she didn’t dare look at him. 

  - Right, I’m gonna make some tea. - his mother interrupted, sensing the tension between them.

  - C’mon. - Sebastian gestured her to follow him. Y/N followed him through the flat and into what she thought was his bedroom. It was a simple bedroom, too simple for the persona she knew he liked to pretend he was. He scanned her up and down not believing she was here and not knowing what to say. - Where are your earrings?

  - What earrings? - she pushed her hair to cover her ears, taking the guitar from her back and handing it to him. He furrowed his brows, taking from her hands and opening the bag to see his old guitar, a smile stretching on his face. - I’m so sorry. I just, I read ...

  - Did you sell your earrings? - he interrupted her. - Y/N, you shouldn’t have sold you earrings.

  - I just, I needed to apologise to you. I should’ve at least started with you, like a regular girlfriend but then I read that you had said that we weren’t dating and I thought you only wanted to sleep with me and I ...

  - I told them we weren’t dating at the time the picture was taken because I didn’t want them to think you’d gotten the job because you slept with me. I know I acted like an asshole before but I didn’t want to jeopardise your career, I wanted you to be criticised for your writing not because you were with me. 

  - I’m so sorry, Seb. - she looked at the ground. - I feel so stupid. 

  - It’s okay. - he wrapped her arms around her. - I’ve done my fair share of stupid, pretty sure I’ll make even more stupid.

  - Wait! - she tilted her head to stare at him. - You’re forgiving me?

  - Well, yes. You are an heiress. - he chuckled, making her playfully slap his chest. - I love you, Y/N. There is little I won’t forgive you for. 

  - I know it was you who got the New Yorker to read my articles and I’m really grateful. I just have something bothering me.

  - What?

  - Did you sleep with my boss? Because if you did, you have to tell me or it’s gonna be really awkward during the Christmas’ office party. 

  - No. - he laughed, pulling her against him. All he wanted right now was to hold her and make sure she wouldn’t leave. - Me and Helena went to school together. She copied off me once, owed me a favour.

  - So you’re friends with my boss? That is somehow worse.

  - I see you got the job then. - he sat down of his bed, pulling her down with him. - Y/N, marry me. 

  - Yeah, alright. - she chuckled, rolling her eyes. Sebastian placed her down on the mattress, walking over to his bedside and pulling a small blue velvet box. He put himself in front of her, getting down on one knee. - What are you doing?

 - Look, I know that we haven’t been dating for more than a year but I love you. I can’t think of myself with anyone else but you and no one else knows me but you. We don’t need to get married right away, we can even stay engaged for the rest of our lives. I just want to wake up everyday next to you with the hope that one day you’ll give me the pleasure of being my wife. Y/N Wiley, will you please marry this dingus?

 - Did you just call yourself a dingus? - she crotched next to him, staring at him with loving eyes. - Yes, I will marry this dingus.

[howtodownloadgta5installer8]

Grand Theft Auto 5 is re-released on Mobile phone, as well, such as Android as well as IOS. So GTA 5 Android is precisely similar to the PC/Consoles variation, and also the storyline as well as video game mechanics are simply made mobile with the very same gameplay, so it is ideal for the mobile gamers out there. Generally, the adjustments that are made in GTA V mobile is simply the control and also game mechanism. Riding the vehicles appears rather very easy due to the easy control mechanism developed by RAGE specifically for mobile phones.

After each unsafe battle, gamers can stop anywhere to see the views of the city. Each scene in this video game is carefully brightened in terms of the image. So it is not just a disorderly location however additionally consists of much poetic appeal. They when fell short, however after that they found each other as well as the distinction in their characters is what links them to ending up being a group. Since then, they have been associated with numerous significant missions, showing opposition to the federal government and also at the same time ruining other terrifying opponents in the underworld. Therefore, if you are a player who suches as to check out the criminal world.

Whenever a phone is seen on promotions, it constantly has a battery life with one segment missing out on (the battery degree seems at 69%, another referral to the 69 sex position). Nonetheless, personality's phones have unlimited battery life. In older editions of the video game, if the player has twin handguns possessed and also gets a telephone call, Carl will certainly pull out two phones. In the console variations of the video game, the phone can likewise be used as a type of "super handbrake", to immediately quit any lorry, regardless of the speed.

As an example, the police car chase in the game has actually been completely redone, and the financial institution heist goal. The enhanced variation of the game also includes the brand-new moped automobile, which can go across the countryside without excessive problem. The storyline is based on the famous book/poem 'We Are Older' created by William Christner.

As GTA V go back to Xbox's prominent Game Pass from Thursday, it has also been exposed that the game will certainly now be usable on smart phones also. Make an entrance directly right into the activity ofGTA 5 Mobileby downloading the records at this moment! You should merely get snap for Android catch and you're great to go. Try not to squander your time on remote recurring communications or emulators with different designs.

The video game is presently offered for consoles as well as Windows PC. It will be released for PlayStation 5 and also Xbox Collection X in late 2021. There is also an on the internet multiplayer mode where up to 30 gamers check out the open world where each gamer can engage into a cooperative or competitive communication in between themselves. This video game series is very well-known by players and reviewers for it having a flexible story and also packed with activity. This GTA 5 for Android has the very same feature as the COMPUTER variation and PS3/PS4 variation have. The only thing that differs in this variation is you can not play this video game on your android devices in the first-person setting. We are still attempting to make it possible on this variation.

Keep in mind, you'll be play the prominent video game just by means of Heavy steam Web link, which is the electronic distribution service. Superstar additionally stated that although it may shed some "functionality", it will get new functions also. Rockstar explained it as being a modern phone, with Dan Houser claiming that the player will utilize it for points like "accessing the internet",.

The other one is created apples iphone, iPads, as well as various iDevices that are suitabled for boosting the video game. GTA BOOM is the original source for all points Grand Theft Auto. We are the only web site committed to posting day-to-day GTA information and have the largest collection of GTA video game overviews available anywhere. Making use of the invincibility cellular phone cheat codePlease read our FAQ if you experience any concerns using these cheats, or if you have any type of questions.

More information was released on the internet site on 24 August, 6 September, and also 13 September. Superstar Gamings first confirmed the video game's existence on 25 October 2011 in a news on its main internet site as well as Twitter feed. Take-Two Interactive's share cost subsequently raised by 7 per cent. Journalists claimed the announcement ignited substantial anticipation within the gaming industry, which they owed to the series' social value. The game did not meet its original projected March-- May 2013 launch day. By 30 October 2012, advertising posters had spread to the Internet, as well as a listing by the store Video game had actually leaked the projected release date.

Superstar Games made their fortune from this highly popular along with questionable franchise. The whole series redefined the benchmark of open globe video gaming. Grand Theft Auto V is the most up to date entry in the schedule, initially released on PlayStation 3 as well as Xbox 360 in 2013.

If you bought the video game from one more Store, you would certainly need to include the executable data of the game to Heavy steam. The designer did an excellent job on their criteria and pictures. The programmer attempted to keep all the features as well as move the video game to Android phones and also tablet computers without shedding performance. If you have not attempted the video game yet, after that we advise that you do it today. This video game is not a main advancement of Rockstar Gamings. The game is badly enhanced, so it will be difficult to run it on the majority of mobile phones.

These two games are additionally quite prominent till now in the whole Grand Theft Auto collection as a result of a selection of factors. In this modern-day pc gaming age, Graphics decide how effective any type of game is. There is no contrast between the graphics of GTA 5 and GTA San Andreas, GTA 5 features superb and top quality graphics that look much more practical than GTA San Andreas. We understand there is a major distinction in between the release date of both of these video games, yet to be extremely truthful GTA 5 is a clear victor based on facts as well as logic. Thousands of individuals are now able to play this GTA 5 on their Android devices.

If you remember i have posted GTA 5 Lite 100MB variation prior to however this game is various. This video game is created by MikeGaming who has a working YouTube Network. You will reach play Its GTA5 mod apk Mission with nearly all main video game information on it Grand Theft Auto 5 was launched in 2013 as well as is still among one of the most played games, many thanks to its ever growing on-line mode called GTA Online. And also while the game does not have a mobile version, it's really possible to play on your Android phone if you want. The video game very first released on the Xbox 360 as well as PlayStation 3, after that made its means to PC.

We will certainly upgrade brand-new functioning download links immediately. Do not hesitate to ask your any kind of question pertaining to this tutorial with remark area, we will reply you shortly. After seeing lots of passion of Android users in the direction of GTA 5, Rockstar has determined to make this video game feasible to run on Android OS. SO they had developed as well as introduced GTA 5 Apk in beta variation.

Superstar really made it out of the park from the GTA franchise. With the introduction of mobile pc gaming, they have actually additionally launched several ready Android as well as iphone devices. Darrell is a blog owner that suches as to stay on par with the most up to date from the tech and finance world.

The video game invites you with wonderful affection to realize you for quite a long time or even months. If you have ever before play GTA 5 on your Computer after that I don't think there is any need to tell you features of this video game. But you are playing it for the first time after that let you recognize what amazing functions are added in this brand-new video game of Rockstar Gamings.

Yet is is time to take pleasure in GTA V for all Android Gamings enthusiasts. One of the most distinguishing characteristic of GTA 5 APK is an upgraded tale play consisting of 3 differed lead characters. Michael De Santa, an ex-con who escaped being incarcerated and also set himself in a spacious manor where he fights with locating a meaningful way of living. That intro of 3 separate personalities is most definitely something brand-new as we practically have different stories as opposed to one prolonged plot gone for one personality advancement. In this manner the gameplay of download GTA 5 is way extra appealing.

Substantial modifications have actually been made with the rise in the variety of tools modifiers and the capability to take turns. Consequently, you can proactively change guns and highly versatile resources whenever you go anywhere. This video game's new functions make it much more practical and challenging than previous Grand Theft Auto video games. And also like in other video games of this kind, you will be given several choices in terms of clothes, hairstyles, as well as faces.

The story contains weaves, and also it's quite incredible just how the whole video game plays out. I never ever get tired of skyrocketing mobsters, driving about in my personal Lamborghini, and viewing the residential property of the rich as well as famous refute around you-- all while making money for it. First PC variation development started in parallel with PlayStation 3 and also Xbox 360. PC growth later on paved the way as focus shifted to the console releases yet ultimately resumed. Due to the fact that the team had actually prepared a PC version from early on, they made technological choices ahead of time to help with later on advancement, like assistance for 64-bit computing and also DirectX 11.

The web sites declaring to supply you the mobile variation of GTA V are phony. We can only wait for Rockstar Games to ultimately re-release GTA V for mobile phones. Till after that, we can delight in the various other titles they have currently released. To get the full version of the video game, you need to obtain the OBB file along with the information file. The GTA V APK data alone is inadequate to enable you to play and take pleasure in the premium variation of the video game on your smart phone.

The initial point that you were mosting likely to require to do is confirm that your device hardware is established as well as effective enough to run the video game to begin with. If you  would certainly love nothing greater than to have the possibility to play this groundbreaking game on your favored Android gadgets, you're going to require to get your hands on a correct GTA 5 APK. No, the GTA 5 APK is not established by the official GTA engineer. Some game engineers have actually created the mobile APK variation.

However, with the rising passion of players in GTA V, it projects to discover an option to download and install GTA V on smart phones. Before downloading as well as setting up, you need to guarantee that you have actually entirely gotten rid of the previous variation or totally free version of GTA5 from your Android device. If you missed this action, your installation will certainly be stopped working at any moment and also you will not able to set up as well as play the game properly. Pavlovich located that while Superstar designated the team objectives to create songs for, some of their arbitrary creations influenced other missions and also sparked motivation for further rating development. He reviewed a "stem-based" system utilized to make songs fit vibrant video game aspects where the team would certainly make up songs to highlight results gamers could make right away after finishing objectives.

That song is a streamlined version of the GTA I motif's history music. It was also the pager's ringtone in GTA III, as well as remained in the GTA Vice City introduction under the retro Rockstar Gamings logo design. If the gamer switches or discharges weapons after a call, the phone will certainly not disappear on CJ's hand. Switching to other weapons, or entering an auto would after that remove this technique. If Carl has his phone out as well as encounters water being splashed from a Firetruck, chances are that if he is simply completing a conversation as well as is about to put his phone away, he instead will keep it in his hand.

[downloadgtavandroid58]

Grand Theft Auto 5 is re-released on Smart phone, too, such as Android as well as IOS. So GTA 5 Android is precisely comparable to the PC/Consoles variation, and the storyline as well as game mechanics are just made portable with the same gameplay, so it is perfect for the mobile players out there. Basically, the changes that are made in GTA V mobile is simply the control as well as video game device. Riding the automobiles appears rather very easy as a result of the easy control mechanism established by CRAZE especially for smart phones.

After each hazardous battle, gamers can quit anywhere to see the scenery of the city. Each scene in this video game is meticulously polished in regards to the image. So it is not only a disorderly area however also includes much poetic beauty. They once failed, however after that they found each other and also the distinction in their characters is what links them to becoming a team. Since then, they have actually been involved in numerous major objectives, showing resistance to the government and simultaneously damaging other distressing challengers in the underworld. Therefore, if you are a gamer that suches as to discover the criminal world.

Whenever a phone is seen on ads, it constantly has a battery life with one sector missing out on (the battery level appears to be at 69%, an additional reference to the 69 sex setting). However, personality's phones have unlimited battery life. In older versions of the video game, if the gamer has twin handguns possessed as well as gets a call, Carl will take out 2 phones. In the console variations of the video game, the phone can likewise be utilized as a type of "extremely handbrake", to instantly quit any type of vehicle, no matter the rate.

For example, the patrol car chase in the game has actually been completely redone, and also the bank break-in mission. The enhanced version of the video game likewise includes the new moped lorry, which can cross the countryside without excessive trouble. The storyline is based upon the renowned book/poem 'We Are Older' written by William Christner.

As GTA V go back to Xbox's preferred Game Pass from Thursday, it has actually additionally been revealed that the video game will certainly now be playable on mobile phones likewise. Make an entrance directly right into the activity ofGTA 5 Mobileby downloading and install the documents at this moment! You must just get break for Android catch and also you're good to go. Attempt not to waste your time on remote continuous communications or emulators with various layouts.

The video game is currently available for gaming consoles and also Windows COMPUTER. It will be launched for PlayStation 5 and also Xbox Series X in late 2021. There is likewise an on the internet multiplayer mode where up to 30 gamers explore the open world where each player can engage into a participating or affordable interaction between themselves. This game series is extremely well-known by gamers and also reviewers for it having a flexible story as well as loaded with action. This GTA 5 for Android has the very same attribute as the PC variation and also PS3/PS4 variation have. The only thing that differs in this version is you can not play this game on your android tools in the first-person mode. We are still trying to make it feasible on this version.

Bear in mind, you'll be play the preferred game only via Vapor Link, which is the electronic distribution service. Rockstar additionally said that although it may shed some "performance", it will certainly acquire brand-new features also. Rockstar defined it as being a contemporary phone, with Dan Houser saying that the player will certainly use it for things like "accessing the web",.

The various other one is created apples iphone, iPads, and also various iDevices that are fit for boosting the game. GTA BOOM is the initial source for all things Grand Theft Auto. We are the only site devoted to publishing everyday GTA information and also have the biggest collection of GTA game guides readily available anywhere. Using the invincibility cell phone cheat codePlease read our FAQ if you experience any concerns utilizing these cheats, or if you have any type of concerns.

Even more information was launched on the internet site on 24 August, 6 September, as well as 13 September. Superstar Games initially verified the video game's existence on 25 October 2011 in an announcement on its main website and also Twitter feed. Take-Two Interactive's share cost ultimately enhanced by 7 per cent. Journalists said the statement stired up substantial expectancy within the video gaming market, which they owed to the collection' cultural significance. The game did not fulfill its initial forecasted March-- May 2013 release day. By 30 October 2012, marketing posters had spread to the Internet, as well as a listing by the store Game had actually dripped the forecasted release date.

Superstar Games made their ton of money from this highly prominent in addition to debatable franchise. The entire series redefined the standard of open world gaming. Grand Theft Auto V is the current entrance in the schedule, originally introduced on PlayStation 3 and also Xbox 360 in 2013.

If you bought the video game from an additional Store, you would certainly need to add the executable data of the game to Heavy steam. The developer did a wonderful job on their parameters and also images. The programmer attempted to keep all the functions as well as move the video game to Android phones and also tablets without shedding capability. If you have not attempted the video game yet, after that we advise that you do it today. This video game is not a main growth of Superstar Games. The video game is improperly enhanced, so it will certainly be tough to run it on the majority of smart devices.

These two video games are additionally quite prominent till currently in the entire Grand Theft Auto collection due to a range of factors. In this contemporary gaming period, Graphics make a decision how effective any type of game is. There is no comparison in between the graphics of GTA 5 and also GTA San Andreas, GTA 5 functions excellent and top notch graphics that look even more sensible than GTA San Andreas. We understand there is a significant difference between the release day of both of these video games, but to be really honest GTA 5 is a clear winner based upon realities and logic. Hundreds of people are currently able to play this GTA 5 on their Android devices.

If you remember i have published GTA 5 Lite 100MB variation prior to yet this game is various. This video game is developed by MikeGaming who has a working YouTube Network. You will get to play Its GTA5 mod apk Objective with mostly all primary game information on it Grand Theft Auto 5 was released in 2013 as well as is still amongst the most played video games, many thanks to its ever expanding on the internet setting called GTA Online. As well as while the video game doesn't have a mobile variation, it's really feasible to play on your Android phone if you desire. The game first introduced on the Xbox 360 and PlayStation 3, after that made its means to COMPUTER.

We will certainly update new functioning download links immediately. Feel free to ask your any kind of question related to this tutorial via comment section, we will reply you soon. After seeing lots of passion of Android users towards GTA 5, Superstar has actually determined to make this game feasible to operate on Android OS. SO they had developed and launched GTA 5 Apk in beta version.

Superstar in fact made it out of the park from the GTA franchise business. With the arrival of mobile video gaming, they have additionally released many games for Android and also iOS tools. Darrell is a blog owner who likes to stay up to date with the most up to date from the technology and also money globe.

The game welcomes you with wonderful affection to comprehend you for fairly a long time or even months. If you have ever play GTA 5 on your Computer system after that I don't think there is any kind of need to tell you features of this game. Yet you are playing it for the first time then allow you recognize what fantastic functions are included this brand-new game of Superstar Games.

But is is time to take pleasure in GTA V for all Android Gamings fans. One of the most distinguishing characteristic of GTA 5 APK is a revamped story play making up 3 varied protagonists. Michael De Santa, an outlaw that ran away being jailed as well as set himself in a spacious manor where he deals with locating a purposeful lifestyle. That introduction of three separate characters is absolutely something brand-new as we practically have separate storylines as opposed to one extensive plot aimed for one character development. By doing this the gameplay of download GTA 5 is way a lot more interesting.

Considerable adjustments have been made with the increase in the variety of tools modifiers and also the capacity to take turns. Consequently, you can actively switch guns as well as extremely versatile sources whenever you go anywhere. This game's new functions make it much more sensible and also difficult than previous Grand Theft Auto games. And like in various other games of this kind, you will be given numerous alternatives in terms of garments, hairstyles, and also facial expressions.

The storyline teems with twists and turns, and also it's quite remarkable how the entire video game plays out. I never get tired of soaring mobsters, driving about in my individual Lamborghini, and also viewing the property of the abundant as well as famous burn down around you-- all while earning money for it. First COMPUTER variation development started in parallel with PlayStation 3 as well as Xbox 360. COMPUTER growth later paved the way as emphasis shifted to the console releases however ultimately resumed. Since the team had planned a COMPUTER variation from at an early stage, they made technical decisions ahead of time to promote later on growth, like support for 64-bit computer as well as DirectX 11.

The sites asserting to offer you the mobile variation of GTA V are phony. We can only wait for Superstar Gamings to lastly re-release GTA V for mobile devices. Till then, we can take pleasure in the other titles they have currently launched. To get the complete version of the video game, you need to get the OBB documents together with the information documents. The GTA V APK data alone is not enough to permit you to play and also enjoy the premium variation of the video game on your cellphone.

The initial thing that you were going to need to do is confirm that your device hardware is set up as well as powerful sufficient to run the game in the first place. If you 'd enjoy absolutely nothing greater than to have the chance to play this innovative video game on your favorite Android devices, you're going to need to obtain your hands on a proper GTA 5 APK. No, the GTA 5 APK is not created by the main GTA engineer. Some video game designers have actually developed the mobile APK variation.

However, with the increasing interest of players in GTA V, it projects to locate a solution to download and install GTA V on mobile devices. Before downloading as well as mounting, you have to make certain that you have actually totally removed the previous version or cost-free variation of GTA5 from your Android gadget. If you missed this action, your installment will certainly be failed at any time and you will unable to set up and also play the game effectively. Pavlovich discovered that while Rockstar appointed the team objectives to compose songs for, a few of their arbitrary creations influenced various other missions and triggered motivation for further score advancement. He reviewed a "stem-based" system made use of to make music fit vibrant game variables where the group would certainly make up songs to highlight end results players could make quickly after completing objectives.

That song is a simplified variation of the GTA I motif's background songs. It was additionally the pager's ringtone in GTA III, and also remained in the GTA Vice City introductory under the retro Superstar Games logo design. If the gamer changes or fires weapons after a telephone call, the phone will certainly not disappear on CJ's hand. Changing to various other weapons, or entering an auto would certainly then eliminate this technique. If Carl has his phone out and also faces water being sprayed from a Firetruck, possibilities are that if he is just finishing a discussion and also is about to place his phone away, he instead will certainly maintain it in his hand.

[sea-side-scribbles]

Fanfiction: Sympathy For A Downer

Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22737214/chapters/79768111

Chapter 68

Nick walked back through the hallway in a comforting trance that persisted until he stood outside again. It was night now and he shouldn't be outside. He could approach his own statue without his stomach turning. Looking at it for a while, he felt closer to his manager and friend now than he had felt at this place before. Virgil had left so many good memories, he was sure he'd never forget him. “I wish I knew what happened...”, he sighed. “Now I have to get along without you and I don't know...” Nick gulped. “I don't know if I'll find a reason to go on...” He wondered if that was a good thing to say to Virgil and what his manager would've wanted. “If I died in my own bathtub that day...would you've grieved for me or would you've closed the chapter, marked me as a failure and moved on with Birdie as your new star...? You know, whenever I met you and you were so caring to me again, I couldn't believe you were about to leave me...But now I wonder...” He sighed again. “What kind of person am I to ask you that now? I still love you, you know?” Impetuously, Nick wiped his dry eyes. “Good night, Virgil”, he whispered. Down the stairway, he went as slowly as he had ascended. It was like a meditation exercise. He needed a new manager but he couldn't imagine having anyone else but Virgil. At the bottom of the stairs, he took a deep breath. Time to look after his friends.

With the first Bobby he saw, he begged and pleaded, playing drunk and lost, until the tall man took heart and gave him a fireman's lift. The certainty that he would be home soon calmed Nick down. He was half asleep when he heard Constable Hunt's voice. “Mr. Lightbearer! Is he alright?” “Yeah, yeah, only pickled...”, the other Bobby said. Nick felt how he was handed over. Hunt's arms held him soon after. “What are you doing?”, Hunt whispered to him. “What are you doing?” Nick stirred, stretched himself and yawned. His improvised taxi waited until he got his share, then he contentedly walked away. Hunt brought the seemingly sloshed rockstar inside and placed him on the couch. “Are you hurt?”, he asked, not sure if the answer would be useful. “Nu-uh”, Nick slurred. Hunt sighed. The rockstar would've told him if he had an owie, for sure. He'd normally keep on and on about it. Hunt also found no blood on him, so he gave him a pat on the shoulder and went outside again.

Nick waited until the Bobby had closed the front door behind him, before he got up. First, he took a look around in the living room, then the kitchen, wondering where his band was. Did they leave him? Worried, he walked up the stairs. “Hey! Guys, where are you?”, he shouted. He didn't get an answer. They could be asleep, of course. Nick went to their guestrooms and opened the doors, only to see them being empty. When he looked into the last of them and found it empty too, his mood plummeted. And he became anxious. Was this whole project dead? Still, there was the third floor. It's quietness wasn't inviting, but Nick ascended the stairs nonetheless. He had to be sure. It hurt to see the white piano that carved out it's miserable existence in a corner. He had gotten it on a whim. He could play it tolerably, he found, but in the past days he had looked forward for his lover to play it once. His hands fondled the keys. The poor thing. And poor Morrie, he would've liked it.

He went into the party room, where he had his stage. There, he was gobsmacked to come upon his friends, lying on the floor, asleep. The sight brought him to the edge of tears again. Still here, despite everything. Their positions didn't look too comfortable, they must've more or less passed out. The amount of empty bottles on the bar told him a story of probably drowning sorrows in alcohol. Well, who was he to judge them? Solaced, he walked out, down the stairs again and into his bedroom. He noticed how tired he was himself, but he had a little bit of energy left. Opening the drawers in his dresser, he found a blanket and pulled it out. It would have to do. Sneaking back up the stairs, he went to his sleeping friends and lay the blanket over them. With that and the carped underneath them, they should be fine, Nick concluded. Smiling faintly, he went back to his bedroom and crawled onto his bed. He didn't have to wait for long until his fatigue won out over him.

He awoke in bright daylight. Absently, he enjoyed it for a time, thinking it could be a wonderful day. If only he didn't have to live his life right now. More sadly, he eyed the empty space next to him. Then he ran a hand over the sheets where a lovely Downer once had lain. Closing his eyes, he recalled how his body had felt, the smell of his soft hair, his loving smile he'll never see again...The memory brought about more tears. Nick felt very alone. But he still had to save his band and that made him push himself forward. Even though that meant coming to terms with them again. Nick was afraid to talk to Matt again. He was afraid he could've told Brad and Chris everything and had turned them against him too. Chris had seen blood on him. And Brad probably believed Matt anyway since the two were close. And still, he had to go through this. Once again. Nick gulped. When would the begging be finally over? When would they start to believe he really meant it?

He got up and went into the bathroom to take a glance at himself in the mirror. Not too good, he thought. Even if he ignored his red eyes, the mask was dirty, he would have to take his spare one. His wig was blowsed, the shiny strands standing on end. He took his comb, but then hesitated. Didn't they like him more without it? He grabbed the wig and pulled it down, freeing his own uncombed hair. Great. It looked even worse. And now it would hurt. Well, beauty knows no pain, Nick pushed himself further and went through the painful procedure of putting his stubborn hair in order. Even combed, it looked weird with the mask, so it felt easier to take it off. He quickly washed his face and shaved, letting the little bit of fluff stay where his desired moustache was. The mask just didn't stick to the face properly if he kept too much facial hair, so this had to do. Well, it wasn't like he still had reporters in his house... Ready but not really, he left the bathroom. He heard some muffled noise from downstairs that made him assume the others were awake. Nick felt like it was a show he wasn't prepared for. I don't feel alright, Virgil. Can't you cancel this gig?

Going down the stairs, the muffled noise went louder. Instead of multiple voices speaking it was rather just one, the one everybody knew. The telly was most likely on. Jack hopefully had happy news. He hesitated to go into the living room. He felt like he needed caffeine first, but what would he look like, giving a speech about his innocence while holding a coffee mug? Ridiculous, yes. At the doorframe he stopped, looking into Uncle Jack's happy face on screen. There went nothing. “Hey, guys”, he said. “Sssh, I want to hear this...!”, Matt hissed. Nick fell quiet. Brad looked over the armrest to see their meek guitarist. “Norbert”, he said in surprise. “I haven't seen you in years!” “That's Nick, dummy”, Chris corrected him without looking. “Yeah?” He looked closer. Nick tried a smile. “Uh yeah, it's me, Nick...” “Whoa”, Brad commented. “Why can't you guys shut up?”, Matt complained, but he turned around to greet the intruder. “Hey, Nick, come here, you missed half the show.” Nick came closer and the fact that he could sit down next to Matt without receiving a punch staggered him. He noticed they had taken the blanket with them and spread it out over them. Matt suddenly eyed Nick and Nick returned the gaze as innocently as he could. Would Matt remember? His pupils were pint-sized. The result of their staring contest was Matt tossing the edge of the blanket over him and then looking back at the screen. Hardly believing his luck, Nick accepted the warming cover and remained quiet, eyeing his friends that were so amazed by Uncle Jack that they didn't take further notice of their defiant guitarist.  

On the coffee table, biscuits and sandwiches were scattered. They made Nick wonder how much was still left in his fridge. Someone had to take care of that, too. But not now, he decided and helped himself. When he started to move, Chris darted a glance at him. Nick froze in his tracks and looked at his friend. He was surprised to see the other man smile shortly and then turn back to the telly. They laughed out loud about one of Jack's jokes and Nick just watched them, baffled. Eventually, Jack had to say goodbye, but not without announcing the coming up program. Still, when the test card appeared on screen, they complained. “Already?”, Matt moaned. “Aw man, I wish his shows were longer. A couple of hours would be cool.” “Yeah, a day-long special, I'd watch it”, Brad agreed. “I guess poor Jack needs a rest now and then”, Nick tossed in. “Maybe...I just can't stop watching this guy...Hey, you missed half the show”, Matt said. “Any news?”, Nick asked. “News...You missed the Downer jokes.” “Oh...” “What's the difference between a Downer and a bolt?” “Uh...” “You don't hammer a bolt.”  

Nick tried to laugh as good as he could. He had used to laugh at these jokes, too. “That's great, yeah...”, he pretended. “Are you okay?” Matt lifted an eyebrow. “Sure, snug as a bug.” Nick forced a grin. “You took your mask off”, Brad noticed. “That's why I didn't recognize you.” “Well, I...I thought you like me more like that... Matt leaned closer. “Show me your eyes.” Nick turned his head away and reflexively moved to get up, but second later, he had Brad's fingers clutching his arm and pinning him down. “Sssh, Norbert.” Chris got up and walked towards him. Nick gave his friends pleading looks. He did take his Joy, but he didn't know what Blackberry Joy did to his eyes. If it did anything at all. “Looks good to me”, Matt said. “Yeah”, Chris approved. “Except for his not-smiling.” “What's wrong with you, Nicky? Got a bad badge?” “No, I...I feel splendid”, Nick assured them. “Just take another...”, Chris held out his hand to him. A pink pill lay in it. Nick looked at Brad, but the drummer didn't let go. “You'll be fine, just take your Joy.” Nick reluctantly obeyed, taking the pill between two fingers. Three pairs of eyes watched him putting the drug in his mouth and gulping. “There you go...” Matt patted his shoulder, and Brad let go. Nick felt unwell, hiding the pill under his tongue.  

“Have you heard anything from Virgil?”, he asked meekly. “Oh, right, that was in the news you missed”, Matt took it up. “Not even you knew your manager would fuck us over?” “Uhm...” “He went on holiday”, Chris said. “Now.” He shook his head. “Did we stress him out that much?” “I...I guess so...”, Nick stuttered. Brad patted his back. “Now, now, don't lose your head over this. It also means we have more free time.” “Right, we're on holiday now too!,” Chris said as if he looked forward to it. “Uh...what if he's not on holiday?”, Nick brought up. Matt gave him a questioning look. “What do you mean, not on holiday?” “Don't you remember what happened yesterday?” “No, why should we?” “Looked like a good time though”, Chris remarked, probably thinking about the bar they had emptied. “Did we drink him under the table?”, Matt asked. “Is he in a coma now?” They stared at him again.  

“Come on, Norbert, say something. What's up with Virgil?”, Brad urged him. Nick's head span. He waved them off. “Ah...it's nothing...I...I just thought out loud...I'm sorry, I'm a bit out of it this morning.” He wrapped the blanket tighter around himself and fell quiet. Brad shrugged. “Alright.” “Need another?” Matt offered him more Strawberry Joy. Nick hesitated, then he fetched the pill from his friend's hand. He wouldn't pop this either. “Guys, I have an appointment I can't miss, can I trust you to behave while I'm gone?”, he said standing up. They laughed. “We're all respectable Wellies, you know?”, Chris said. “You're the one we have to watch, Nicky.” “Be a good boy, you hear me?”, Matt added. “And put your mask back on”, Brad reminded him. Nick promised everything and went into his bedroom to prepare, spitting out the pink pill. He was eager to leave.  

        Some time later, he dashed into James' arms. The other man held him close, running a hand over Nick's head. It didn't take long until the tears came back. Nick had to cling to their closeness for a long time before he felt good enough to let go. Searching for words, he then eyed the floor. “What is it, Nick?”, his friend asked in a soft tone. “James, I'm at the end of the line! I lost all at once! Arthur left me, Virgil is dead and my band is overdosing on Joy...”, the words poured out. “I can't go on without a manager! I'm a walking chaos already, and now my friends...I need someone to get my life organized, to pay all my bills...this is the end of me! He wrapped his arms around himself. “I'm sorry you spent so much time on me, all for nothing...” James put an arm around him and pressed him gently against his chest. “Now, now, it's not over yet, my golden boy. I know how much Virgil meant to you and I can't easily fix the hole Arthur left in your heart, but believe me, good old James has some more aces up his sleeve.” Nick gave him a wide-eyed look. “You can help me?” James' hand drew little circles on Nick's upper arm. “I think so.” Nick lowered his head again and let it rest on his friend's chest. “Am I dreaming?” “No”, James soft voice assured him. “You're wide awake, and you're with me...” Nick lay his arms around the other man again. “I'm so glad I can trust you...” James smiled. “I'm glad you trust me.” Nick returned the smile and enjoyed to be in his soulmate's arms for some more time.  

“Do you want to stay?”, James went on. Nick thought about it. “I shouldn't leave my friends alone...I'm so afraid something might happen to them too...I have to protect them, even if they'd hate me if they remembered what happened...” “Why would they hate you?” “Because of what I did to Morrie, because of Arthur and because every time someone I love gets killed, I end up in a strange coincidence that makes me look suspicious...It's like the killer is playing with me.” “And your good friends now think you're a murderer?” Nick shook his head. “They're not thinking anything right now! Yesterday, they knew he was dead, but this morning they heard Uncle Jack say Virgil is on holiday and they bought it!” Nick hung his head. “I wonder if I'm the reason why they overdosed. Honestly, I don't know what I would think if I were them...I just wish they'd be back in their senses and on my side...I had been shit to them in the past, but I was never evil.” “I can well believe it,” James affirmed. Nick lit up a bit but it didn't last long. “I wonder if I was evil to Arthur...” James lifted his eyebrows. “Did he lose his trust in you so suddenly?” Nick eyed the floor again. “He found out about Morrie...He figured I wasn't worth it...” His eyes watered again. “It's like you said, I lost them both...Now I wish I told them the truth.” “Do you think they'd have acted differently?” Nick sighed deeply. “I guess Arthur...Arthur would've left me anyway...He...He actually had no time for me in any case...” James gave him a questioning look.  

“All he wanted was to find his lost brother...He said he's in...Germany...The train...” A shadow flashed over he other man's face. For a second, he looked harassed, but it was gone before Nick could really notice it. “I've never seen the train myself”, Nick went on. “I was too old to go, and I didn't want to watch it, so I ran away and hid in a shack to smoke.” Guilt crept into his voice. “You were still very young. You didn't have to watch it. No child...should've experienced this...” James' eyes glazed over, as if he was looking at an image in his mind. “Arthur must've suffered...without Joy...”, Nick whispered. “You couldn't know”, James comforted him. “Your fates simply went into different ways.” Nick pressed his head into the other man's suit, wetting it with tears. “It still hurts...I feel guilty for not telling him the truth, but also, I had no clue who he was...I mean if I knew...If I knew he'd leave me anyway...I wouldn't have...I wouldn't have betrayed Morrie...”, he sobbed. James held him again, stroking him. “See, you're not the only one making mistakes...” “You mean I should forgive Arthur? Well, I do! God, I wish he came back!”, Nick cried. “He'll be happier now”, James said quietly. “And possibly even you too...” Nick was shaken by a crying fit, so James silently walked him into the living room and sat down with him, letting him wet his shoulder and patting his back in return.  

[glutko]

FNaF Bootleg Merch VII: Come Back to Me(xico)

View the previous six parts here.

After a year of inactivity, this series has returned. eBay has finally listed enough bootleg FNaF toys for me to do a new, extra-long entry. And let me tell you, they’re particularly rancid this time. I wasn’t trying to aim for that, but here we are. 

In addition, there may or may not be non-FNaF figures that are only here because they popped up when I searched FNaF on eBay. So look forward to those!

So, without any further delays, let us dive into this rabbit hole once again...

Where do we begin? I know! Let’s talk about the current line of Mexican FNaF bootlegs known as “Five Nights at Freddy Twisted The Twisted Ones”. Why is the name so weird? Well, that’s because it comes from the official label, as seen below:

First off, what the hell is up with the Funtime Freddy/Bonnie figures? They’re Funtime, obviously, but also Nightmares? Or Twisted, due to how bad the figures look? And why are they holding puppets of themselves? Bonnie in particular looks like he tore off Bon-Bon and is holding it in the air like a display of victory.

Nightmare Funtime Foxy’s paint scheme is so bad that I thought his chest cavity was smashed open and his guts were falling out. Only Ennard looks presentable. Good lord. But it doesn’t stop there, friends: there are two more bags in this series. Let’s get some Twisted animatronics up in here!

...On second thought, maybe not. 

From left to right, we’ve got a confused Twisted Foxy with a broken jaw that’s made out of scabs, Stealth Mode Twisted Wolf that wears an ill-fitting tie whilst reciting Hamlet, an easily-impressed Twisted Bonnie who’s trying to copy Wolf, and a Phantom Twisted Freddy who looks absolutely putrid, and not in the way that Scott Cawthon intended. Looks like he was made out of a rotting avocado. Disgusting.

We’re not done yet, though. Let’s take a look at the third and final bag in the Twisted series. And it’s a beauty.

Where do we even begin? The Twisted Puppet with an orange squeezer in its chest that’s clearly a ripped-off fan design? The mutant Springtrap that looks like a cross of Scraptrap and that Salvage fandesign? The 12 oz. Mouse reject Stanley made out of sacks? Or the Twisted Nightmare Chica with peeling paint and a torn bib that says “LETS”? Here’s the answer - none of these, as I don’t want to look at this image anymore.

Here’s a bag of translucent Bendy and the Ink Machine figures that popped up because I searched FNaF on eBay. Yep. Don’t give them to a child, they’ll eat it and die from toxic paint or something.

I know I showed these filthy figures in a previous part, but man, seeing them in a proper display and under normal lighting is so fucked up. Look at Chica, man! That shit is utterly horrifying, and I know it’ll kill me in my dreams tonight. The Bonnie and Puppet aren’t much better, either. Also, why does Foxy have huge shoulder pads? Are they trying to make him look like that buff anime version of him and failing miserably?

Hey... you ever heard the term “half-assed”? Where someone does a lackluster job at something?

This isn’t even quarter-assing it. Did the person who make this have a vague description of Ballora to go off of? “Yeah, there’s this robot girl who looks like a half-naked ballerina. Her face splits into four halves. Also, she wears all-pink, except for her tutu, which is purple and looks like it’s made out of one of those paper ruffs you’d find in a birthday decoration. Get to work.”

Ugh. I need something to take the taste of crap Ballora out of my mouth. I know! Let’s go visit our lovely Rockstar animatronics! I bet they’re doing well this time of year!

Hm. I made fun of figures similar to these in the last part... but these are lower in quality, implying that the bootleggers are ripping off bootleg toys again. That’s right - it’s another case of bootleg Inception!

Speaking of, here are the original figures for you to compare them to, because I am too lazy to come up with my own content. Or maybe these are the bootlegs, I don’t really know. 

I will say this, though - Scrap Baby looks absolutely terrible. On both of them. The face rivals paper Ballora in terms of sheer crapness.

Yaoi Hands Toy Bonnie. Yes. I have no idea what fan design this figure is supposed to be ripping off. I don’t think any FNaF character has a design quite like this. Is this a repaint over an existing non-FNaF figure? Please let me know.

Edit: It’s a figure of Drawkill Toy Bonnie. Huh.

Let’s take a small break from these crap FNaF figures and look at a set that was recommended to me by eBay. Y’all ever heard of Miraculous Ladybug?

The bootleggers have, and dear GOD what the hell is wrong with their EYES. They are wired, man! They’ve taken some bad drugs, and now they’re suffering and paying the price. Also, what’s up with those short chibi things? Are they supposed to be that big and freakish? 

Can we please stop looking at this image? 

Ah, yes, there we go! For our final bootleg set, we have these... figures of the plushies? I don’t really know. 

Why are there two Mangles, one of which appears to be absolutely plastered with blood? What’s wrong with Toy Bonnie’s face - did he have some of the drugs as well? Why does the Puppet look like it’s fallen into a vat of paint stripper? Why does Foxy look like he’s got a vest made of turkey on, as well as fake fingernails for ears? Why are there two Freddys? Why is one of them hiding behind Foxy? Is he shy?

Is... is that Loss on Chica’s bib?

And that’s all I have for now. I must say, I do hope that the bootleggers find out about Help Wanted and Security Breach. Then we’ll have quality Vanny, Glitchtrap, and Glamrock figures to point and laugh at.

[dippedanddripped]

It’s rare that it reaches 100 degrees in the suburbs of Portland, Oregon.

Even rarer still is the presence of an all-gold Dodge Challenger, its reflection giving the appearance of a bejeweled shooting star pulling into the parking lot.

This one also has a vanity license plate – “Sammyy” – that enhances the car’s extraterrestrial appearance.

The Challenger’s occupant exits and joins me at a table. As she takes a seat across from me, a group of 20-somethings not too far away becomes intrigued.

More stares start to accrue from the outdoor mall goers. Next up is a young couple pushing a stroller, followed by the employees at the coffee shop I had just exited.

A minute ago, neither myself nor the table I was at seemed to warrant much, if any, attention.

You can get the sense that “somebody” just entered the premises, even if they’re not quite sure who that somebody is.

I can tell that the attention phases me more than my recently-arrived guest. Despite the now fishbowl-like dynamic between the two of us and the mall-goers, she seems to barely notice.

Then again, when you have more than 2.5 million followers on instagram and nearly half a million more on Tik Tok, being recognized by random passerby doesn’t come as a surprise like it would for most.

Rockstar? No, influencer

I distinctly remember the plethora of classmates I graduated high school with who promised to one day grow up and become “rockstars.”

Unsurprisingly, I haven’t heard from any of those classmates since. What is surprising is how anachronistic the notion of being a “rockstar” has become.

The reality is that “rockstar” should probably be replaced with a new term – ”influencer.” Sure, it’s not quite as catchy, but it’s far more accurate when describing the world’s latest (and perhaps most enviable) celebrity class.

These days, very real rock stars have nothing on the modern day Influencer.

Influencing by the numbers

What little data on the subject tells us is that, in 2016, social media influencing was just under a $2 billion industry ($1.7B, for those with a penchant for exactness).

This figure grew to $3B in 2017, and $4.6B in 2018.

In 2020, estimates tell us that the sector is likely to surpass the $10B mark.

While that may not seem like a lot of money, think of it this way – in a little under 4 years, the size of the influencing industry grew 500%.

Should the industry continue on its current growth trajectory, it will become a $50B industry by 2024.

To put this in perspective, Goldman Sachs estimates that the total value of all recorded music streaming will grow to about $30B by 2030. That means that it will take some years for music to reach just half of what influencing brings in annually.

By some metrics, influencers have become more relevant as celebrities than their musical counterparts. It’s happened quickly; adults who use social media religiously often can’t see it.

But real professional influencers are out there. As a crowd begins forming near our table, I begin to witness firsthand what these ridiculous financial statistics truly mean.

Who is Sammyy02k?

Since 2014, Samantha Krieger has gone by a number of different names. These days, she’s known as Sammyy02k.

Despite her reluctance to do in-person interviews, she’s agreed to be the subject of an Artvoice feature on the rise of social media influence.

And while Krieger can exercise her massive reach with just a few taps of a smartphone, a lot of misinformation about her continues to circulate.

As part of her agreement to the interview, I offer to help clarify the basics about just who exactly she is.

Samantha Krieger, AKA Sammyy02k

Samantha Krieger was born in Portland, Oregon. For some years, she was no different than you or me, working tedious retail jobs and driving a non-gold car.

At Lakeridge high school, she was dealt with taunts from wealthy classmates. It’s likely these experiences would activate whatever latent stardom was already within her.

After graduating from Portland State University in 2014, Krieger had a vision.

She suspected, correctly, that it doesn’t take much to at least get started as an influencer.

You need photos and/or video, sure… but given the prevalence of acceptable cameras on the backs of phones, finding a suitable recording setup was simple.

The second ingredient Krieger inferred was something less tangible – the courage required to be exceptional.

Despite her natural shyness, she had ambitions that extended beyond what she thought her bachelors degree would help achieve. Then, one day, it clicked.

“You could say I decided to become an ‘antisocial social media star.’”

“I did what I wanted to do, and I knew there was going to be a way to make it work for me.”

From 0 to 60 (thousand followers)

Like any new profile, at one point, @Sammyy02k had 0 followers.

Constant content and connection with followers helped drive things quickly, however.

A few hundred followers within a month turned into one thousand, and one thousand turned into tens of thousands in less than a year.

While impressive to most, Krieger knew there was more to be gained.

“Once I hit 50 or 60 thousand, things started to snowball. I hit the gas.”

@Sammyy02k posted more content, becoming more aware of her developing voice with every post.

At 500k followers, the contracts rolled in.

Brand building, Sammyy02k style

Krieger’s first contract of note was in Spring 2018, a lucrative deal with clothing brand Fashion Nova.

Now, instead of developing a brand on her own money and time, Krieger had companies competing against one another for the privilege of paying her to do what she loved.

The Fashion Nova contract was quickly followed by others, and within just a matter of months, Krieger’s lifestyle had changed dramatically.

She quit her last remaining part-time gig and moved into a luxury 2-bedroom apartment in Portland’s famed Pearl District.

With newfound status, however, came the need for significant soul searching.

Overcoming obstacles, digital and personal

Not too long after inking the Fashion Nova deal, Sammyy02k was offered to do a paid appearance at a party in downtown Portland. While there, she got a call from the police.

A gray Dodge Charger registered in her name had crashed into a median in China Town. The driver had fled, and the car was totaled.

Krieger immediately had a suspect in mind: a reckless boyfriend who had started taking advantage of her recently-acquired celebrity status.

Boyfriends weren’t the only concerns that Krieger had to deal with – even some of her own friends had started to become jealous, the relationships turning toxic.

To her friends, Krieger was still known as just “Sam”. People in her circle had difficulty comprehending the controlled entrepreneurism required to run @Sammyy02k.

They’d ask for shoutouts or suggest off-brand posts, not understanding that the Instagram profile required attention to detail and discipline.

Old friends becoming enemies seems like an overplayed Hollywood trope.

For a young adult who now could command thousands of dollars for just a few minutes of work, it was reality.

The type of loneliness that hides in shadows of success began to stretch further and further into Krieger’s personal life. The totalled car was the last straw.

While on the phone with the police at her first paid party appearance, Krieger took a deep breath and decided that staying on her desired path would require serious changes.

“I saw this as an opportunity where I could come back, and make a statement.”

It turned out that ditching the car (and the boyfriend) would be one of her best career decisions yet.

A car is born

A few weeks after the incident, Sammyy02k returned from a luxurious all-paid overseas trip to the Seychelles with a new travel sponsor. Krieger decided that she “needed a new whip.”

By now, Krieger had registered an LLC in her name. Business was coming fast and steady, and it wasn’t uncommon for her to be recognized on the street – not only in Portland, but in Los Angeles and even cities as far away as Kansas City.

Krieger elaborates:

“At this point, I was really stepping into my role as an influencer. This is when I really refined my style, my brand, and my image.”

For you and me, “refining your style” might mean picking up a few shirts from a department store.

To Krieger, it meant buying a brand new custom Dodge Challenger R/T wrapped in metallic gold with scissor-doors, the kind you’ll find on a Lamborghini.

According to Krieger, the car represents the essence of her brand, and the luxury of travel. It’s now one of the most recognized facets of her style.

Sammyy02k all over the world

Sammyy02k’s influence, today, is international.

With sponsorship deals taking her to the Seychelles, Dubai, Abu Dhabi, and beyond, she is now recognized in 4 continents.

She prides herself on showing her fans different places around the world. The path less traveled, the freedom to be everywhere, the luxury lifestyle that many in our always-connected society dream of.

“I feel connected to the road, and traveling to exotic locations”

The opportunities that sudden stardom has afforded her seem almost surreal, even to her. Normalcy is a mirage in the rear view mirror.

Responding to criticism

In mid-2019, Krieger was the main guest on a Portland Fashion Week panel. Already an influencer to influencers, she insisted that whatever secret ingredients success exist come naturally.

During a Q&A, she fielded numerous questions regarding her chosen career path. Not all of the questions were softballs.

Some questioned the materialism and sexuality often used by influencers.

The response was simple:

“Your opinions don’t pay my bills.”

Always on the go

With more followers pouring in every day, Sammyy02k stays busy. She recounts tales of distant travels, and the types of perks that I thought were originally reserved for a few select people who orbited high above in the LA movie industry.

Thirty minutes into the interview, I notice that a distant crowd has accumulated around our table like rings around Saturn.

Krieger barely seems to notice. A reminder goes off on her phone, a notification about another engagement she has back in the city.

After a polite exchange of thank yous and goodbyes, she heads back to her car.

I hear the exhaust note of the Challenger float away from the parking lot as I gather my notes and get up from the table.

As I glance up, the crowd has already dispersed. The only people left pay me no mind as they stare at their phones.