#and 'what if it was pretty punny'

[cocksley-and-catapult]

wwwhat animal would Hatsune Miku be in the c&c universe

bonus points if you change their name to suit the specific animal

[maretriarch]

the first time i ever saw the word radfem was back when the dancestors were coming out and someone used it to refer to latula/porrim

[ultravioart]

okay crackship time: Peepers and Marvin getting along really well, and eventually Marvin asks how old Peepers is since he's senior to his army, and Peepers thinks he's using silly wordplay, not realizing the Martian empire actually runs on age seniority: P: "Why, I've been 42 since birth." X: "Really! How fascinating." P: "That... was a joke, Marvin." X: "Ah." (silence) P: "Yeesh, relax, (laughs) I'm only 24!" X: "ONLY?! 24 thousand is very young!" P: "Oh, Hah. Hah. Very funny." X: "Do not 'Hah' me! I'm being serious!"

[still-a-morosexual-help]

I'm pretty sure I've said this before but I want to say it again because it won't stop rattling in my brain

So we know Lucifer likes dumb punny dad jokes

And in the manga, where transformed-into-a-sheep-MC can't remember their name, he names them "Zephyr" as a pun/joke because:

1.) at the moment he was thinking of a name a breeze blew in

2.) a breeze blowing was what made Lucifer pick MC for the exchange program in the first place

The game is obviously a different AU from the manga and MC's name totally depends on whatever each individual player picks

However, MC still gets picked for the exchange program because of the wind scattering all the candidates' documents after Lucifer opened a window and picked MC randomly

Anyway, my point being "Zephyr" is an absolutely amazing name and I'm obsessed with the headcanon that game Lucifer (and only Lucifer) uses it as a nickname for MC

[undreaming-fanfiction]

Steve Harrington, Eddie Munson, Robin Buckley and Nancy Wheeler have a well-known channel on YouTube (the name is something horrible and punny that Eddie and Robin made up, way before they blew up - Four Some (just some four guys and gals you perv). They cover pretty much everything - music reviews, various activities like ice skating, pole dancing or sculpting, they do tasting videos, social experiments and much more. Their personalities are so different but somehow that only makes their content more appealing. It doesn't matter if their videos contain Steve and Eddie replicating the famous pottery scene from the Ghost (and Robin's screeches that they ruined a completely fine vase) or Robin testing whether Nancy's vocal range increases proportionately to how many wine glasses she drinks

Gradually they grow their audience and gather a small crew that works with them. Barb Holland does a lot of editing and directing and she is getting recognized for her achievements, just like Gareth Emerson for his work with sound. Everyone in their crew are friends and are supporting each other in growing and promoting their talents.

There is only one person who has always remained a mystery. The person filming them, always hidden behind a camera. Credits always mention Chris C. and the fanbase tries to pry and figure out who they are, they really do, but the group shuts down their attempts almost instantly. "Chris has been instrumental to this channel's success," Eddie says and there is something hard behind his eyes, something that almost never makes it past his laid-back attitude and usual theatrics. "They have decided to stay out of our videos for a reason and we'd like you to respect their decision."

Not everyone drops it, but the four creators assume a united front and eventually, people stop prying. So it comes as a shock when around a year later, a new video drops on the channel. But the face in it is unknown.

"Hi guys," the young woman smiles and she looks so dejected, so scared, but the sound guy Garreth sits next to her and squeezes her hand, grounding her. "I swore I'd never sit in front of a camera again, but...I think it's time. So let me introduce myself. I am Chrissy Cunningham, but you know me as Chris C. And also..." she takes a deep breath, "I am also Chrissy from the Cunningham family channel."

Chrissy goes through it all. She talks about her life with her mother, an obsessive family blogger, who had Chrissy give up all her hobbies, her friends, her privacy from a young age. How her only friend became the school outcast, Eddie, and she had to keep him a secret too - not because she was ashamed, he meant everything to her, but because her mother would steal him too. How she could never have anything of her own, was always on camera, always tested for reactions, always forced to perform and mocked for it at school. How she couldn't handle it anymore and as soon as she was eighteen, she moved in with Eddie and his uncle. How it was only then that she started learning about herself, about who she was and what she wanted to do. "Now that you know who I am, I hope you can look past what I was made to do years ago and see me as...me. Just me."

She and Gareth leave their seats and are replaced with Eddie and Nancy. While Eddie mostly sits quietly, Nancy introduces their newest project that Chrissy suggested - documentaries on dangers of YouTube, TikTok and their insufficient regulations, especially when it comes to family vloggers and loss of privacy. "It might not be everyone's cup of tea, but that is exactly the point", says Nancy and looks directly at the camera. "We're here on camera, showing you parts of our lives that we want to show. But there are many who didn't consent to this, many who are being exploited for views. And on behalf of this chanel, let me address those who think this is okay. We're coming for you."

[withacapitalp]

Root Beer

Happy birthday @stevesbipanic !!! I had an idea for this so long ago, but then your birthday gave me the perfect excuse to write it. I'm so honored we are friends, I am still so shocked about it (Flashback to my OG post about Tumblr royalty liking one of my posts) and I cannot wait to get to spend even more time with you <333

“Remind me again why you always pay for Erica’s ice cream?” Eddie wondered as Steve dug into his wallet and forked over the dollar eighty five required for Erica’s scoop of cotton candy with rainbow sprinkles. 

“It’s reparations for child endangerment,” Erica replied immediately, sticking her tongue out briefly as Steve rolled his eyes. 

Eddie automatically stuck his tongue out right back at her, making her laugh as she skipped off to the other side of the counter and waited for her treat. The kids had asked for a ride to the ice cream shop, but in a rare display of discipline, Steve had refused to pay for any of them except Erica, and, shockingly, no one had complained. They had all pooled their money, ordered three sundaes to split, and were now sitting in the corner digging into their treats. 

“I’ll tell you about it some other time,” Steve promised, keeping his wallet open as he turned towards his boyfriend, “Are you gonna get anything?” 

“Still deciding,” Eddie said, bouncing on his heels. 

The shop was no Scoops Ahoy, but it did have a wide array of different options, all with wonderful punny names. He was currently between getting a ‘Bloody Sundae’, which was a vanilla scoop with cherry syrup and chocolate sprinkles, or a ‘Mint to be’, which was mint chocolate chip with whipped cream and bright green sprinkles. 

Maybe he could get both if he gave Steve the right amount of puppy eyes. That usually worked for other things. Dates, getting to pick the movie they watched at night…..other….things. 

Eddie was still thinking through his strategy as Steve stepped up to order. 

“Can I get a large root beer float with soft serve twist and a cone on the side?” Steve asked, using his customer service voice with a charming smile, making the girl behind the counter twitter and twirl her hair as she rang him up and walked off to make his float. 

Eddie blinked a few times trying to register what Steve had just said, before groaning loudly and pulling a disgusted face. 

“What?” Steve wondered, bewildered by Eddie’s vehement reaction. 

“Root beer,” Eddie said with a grimace, waggling his tongue. 

“What’s wrong with root beer?” 

“It’s so…sweet,” Eddie finally got out, trying and failing to find the exact words to explain his complete disdain for root beer. He had given root beer a real try, multiple attempts and everything, but every time he had spat it out, unable to enjoy the taste. 

“Eddie, I have seen you eat a frosting sandwich,” Steve said in a complete deadpan, giving Eddie a raised brow look, “Just frosting and white bread,”

“Don’t judge my trailer park cuisine, rich boy!” Eddie cried in an overdramatic tone, clutching his chest and shaking his head with his eyes shut tight, “I’m not the one having nasty icky sarsaparilla nonsense, making future kisses completely impossible until you have purged yourself of the disgusting concoction.”

Steve burst into bright loud laughter, lighting up the entire store like he was the goddamn sun. Eddie paused in his diatribe, watching Steve with lovesick eyes as he giggled uncontrollably. 

“Sarsaparilla concoction,” Steve huffed out, continuing to chuckle, “God, I love you, you big dork.”

Oh. 

Oh. 

Both of them paused, staring at each other with wide eyes as they took in what Steve had just let slip out. 

It wasn’t like they didn’t both know. They had been dating for three months, crushing on each other for two before that, and every minute had been pure bliss. There was no doubt that Steve was the love of his life, and Eddie had been pretty sure Steve felt the same. 

Now he knew for a fact, and that was a lot to take in standing in the middle of a subpar ice cream shop. 

“I- um- I,” Steve stopped trying to stutter, giving Eddie a nervous little look, letting his eyes drop to his shoes as he shuffled in place. Eddie’s surprise faded into unbearably warm affection. He reached over and quickly squeezed Steve’s hand, knowing he wasn’t able to do more in public, but wishing he could kiss Steve until they were both drunk and delirious on their love. 

“I’ll have a black raspberry shake with chocolate sprinkles, whipped cream, and hot fudge,” Eddie called out as the cashier walked back over with Steve’s float, delivering it with a flirty little smile. Steve didn't even look at her as he took his ice cream, and she rang them up lightning fast, clearly jilted by his non-response. Eddie couldn't care less, dragging Steve over to their tables and waiting for his order to be called. 

“I love you too, sweetheart,” Eddie said softly as they sat down, the words being overshadowed by the sound of their kids happily screaming at each other. He looked around and risked a quick kiss on the cheek, getting Steve buttered up and happy before he finished his sentence. 

“Even if your taste is trash,” 

[1d1195]

Zipper Extra VII

As much as I love this couple, I struggled to come up with an idea for this so I hope this works.

~3.5k words

“I want it to be perfect,” she whispered.

“For whom, m’love?” He wondered. “For me? You’re there. We could get married in trash bags and be married by an alien,” he reminded her making her smile so gorgeously it made Harry’s heart skip a beat.

Harry was losing his mind again.

There was a ring on her finger and somehow that made her more enticing to the men that saw her in public. At the coffee shop, Harry would look at the different roasts to take home and someone would immediately start chatting with her asking to buy her coffee unaware that Harry was only a few feet away. Of course she stopped them politely, explained her fiancé was right there. “Oh, I didn’t even notice the ring,” the man murmured, further turning Harry green with envy.

When they were at the grocery store, the bagger insisted on lifting her items and offered to take them to her car while Harry headed back to grab something they inevitably forgot. Once more she assured the man that her fiancé was more than capable of doing so. “Hmm...I didn’t see your ring,” he admitted.

Of course they didn’t.

Why would anyone bother to look away from her pretty face for even a second to see if she was happily taken?

It soured Harry’s mood immensely. Naturally, she was kind about it on the ride home. She didn’t speak about it at all, merely held his hand as he drove and gave it a gentle squeeze every couple of minutes. She would tell him all about her ideas for their wedding; how she wanted sunset colors for her bouquet: peach, golden yellow, some light orange colors, sprigs of purple, and rosy pinks. “I think it will offset the blue dresses the girls will wear really nicely,” she explained.

He typically grunted in response still feeling frustrated over how someone blatantly flirted with her. It shouldn’t have surprised him. She was so pretty and so nice. It was a wonder Harry didn’t resort to physical fights. Eventually after a few grunts she would finally ask. “Do you have any ideas of what you want? I’ve been struggling with a seating arrangement plan. I see lots of cool things on Pinterest, but nothing really speaks to me.”

Almost always it worked. Harry would clear his throat, forced to answer her question. He had to forget about the jealousy that filled him because he would rather die than not help his fiancée with whatever it was she wanted. “M’not too sure,” he murmured. “What are the options?” Because he was not going to be one of those men who did nothing to help plan. She went through hundreds of different options and questions. They were pretty agreeable on most fronts.

“Having the seats listed on a mirror is really popular these days. I went to a wedding in college that was on a windowpane and that was cool. I’m really into this thing I saw though it almost looks like a clothesline—little clips hold the cards in place for people to find it.”

Harry could hear the way her voice changed when she talked about the little clothesline. “I like that,” he smiled.

“Yeah? You’re not just saying that?” She always asked.

“No, kitten. Course not,” if he didn’t like it, he would tell her. “I think it’ll be beautiful.”

“I was also thinking about our welcome sign.”

“Hmm?”

Harry knew she was trying to trick him into feeling less jealous the longer she spoke. It worked too. “I’ve been trying to come up with something punny. Finally found ‘you’ve been sentenced to a lifetime of happiness,’” she giggled. Harry snorted and shook his head. “Is that lame?” He glanced at her peripherally as they pulled onto their apartment’s street.

“Not if y’want it, love,” he assured her.

“I know, but I want you—”

“I think it’s adorable,” he pulled into a spot on the street and parked. He turned to her finally, gazing into her soft, pretty eyes. He looked at her lips and brought his hand to her face admiring how warm her skin felt beneath his palm. She was so pretty every moment of the day it was incredible she was all his to admire.

“It’ll have a gavel below the words, and I want it to be decorated with the flowers we pick,” she continued.

“You’ve already made the sale, kitten,” he chuckled, brushed his thumb on her lip.

“I want it to be perfect,” she whispered.

“For whom, m’love?” He wondered. “For me? You’re there. We could get married in trash bags and be married by an alien,” he reminded her making her smile so gorgeously it made Harry’s heart skip a beat.

“Well,” she sighed. “When you put it that way.”

“M’sorry m’a jealous monster,” he whispered quietly.

She blushed below his hand, and she glanced from his uninterrupted gaze. “I don’t think you’re a monster. I don’t think you have anything to be jealous of either.”

He smiled; pressed his lips to her forehead and nodded. “Probably not, but can’t help it,” he shrugged. “M’sorry.”

“I would probably tear a girl’s eyes out if she even looked at you.”

Harry laughed loudly. “I would never make y’jealous, kitten. Ever. But I would love t’see that.”

*

It was going to be a spring wedding. Spring in the loosest sense of the word. It was going to be on the first day of spring but there was no way of knowing if it would be a warm spring day or a holdover of a cold winter day.

It didn’t bother her much planning most of it. Everyone in her life told her a thousand different things that made her anxious and sick of hearing the difference of opinions when the only opinion she cared about was Harry’s.

“I want to show you my dress so bad,” she told him while they snuggled on the couch watching a movie.

He smiled. “I can’t wait t’see it, kitten. Gonna look like an angel,” he kissed the top of her head.

She buried her face into his side. “I don’t know about angel,”

He chuckled. “Course y’will, love. Y’look like an angel every day,” he reminded her.

She laughed, muffled by his ribcage. If she had the ability to tell her younger self she would one day be engaged to Harry Styles she didn’t think there was a world in which she would have believed it. But right beside him, calling her an angel. It seemed like the surest thing to ever bet on.

*

“Mom,” she sighed rubbing her forehead. Harry was walking in the door, a box of cupcakes for tasting. He picked them up after a long day of work. She could see the exhaustion on his face. There were dark circles under his eyes and his hair had that look that he ran his hand through it too many times.

On the table was a giant poster board filled with sticky notes that was supposed to keep them organized in planning but felt like a full-time job some nights.

Her mom was talking in her ear about how her uncle wanted to bring his new girlfriend despite the fact his ex-wife was going to be there, and they did not get along. “Mom, it’s my wedding!” She was practically bubbling with tears. Harry rushed over, missing the counter as he put the box down, which left the cupcakes smeared on the floor in the process. Harry looked at the box like it was the box’s fault but feeling shame that it was his own doing.

Her jaw dropped in shock, unable to believe the chaos that seemed to creep in every moment the closer it got to the wedding. It was only four months away and they had already been planning for so long. While she looked at the ruined cupcakes, she listened to her mom try to reason with her that it was what you were supposed to do at a wedding. They could rearrange everyone when the time came so that everyone was happy.

“Mom, I have to call you back,” she mumbled and hung up without another word. Poor exhausted Harry looked at the cupcakes.

“Fuck, m’sorry, kitten,” he frowned. “I thought y’were going t’cry and I just wanted t’make sure y’didn’t...I can call and ask for another dozen and go get them right now—”

“Can we get married this weekend?” She looked at him nervously. “Please?” She whispered.

His voice felt broken. They had been planning for nearly a year. A wedding that they were grateful to afford because so many could not have the elaborate wedding they were planning. One that had everything they wanted. But even in their own planning, it was their wedding and yet it was still dissolving into anxiety and madness. It was supposed to be in front of all their friends and family. “But what ‘bout—”

“We can do that one too, but I’m going crazy. You’re going crazy,” her voice cracked. “I just want to be your wife. I don’t care about any of this anymore,” she whispered.

“Kitten,” he cooed.

“I know I’m crazy but if one more person asks if they can bring their child after I specifically said no children I’m going to scream,” she sniffled.

“Baby,” he frowned. “Please don’t cry,” he wrapped his arms around her and kissed her forehead. “I know s’overwhelming but I want you t’have—”

“Then please marry me. This weekend,” she repeated into his shirt.

“How on earth could I say no to you?” He asked rhetorically.

*

Angelic was insulting compared to how beautiful she looked. In fact, there wasn’t a word to describe how perfect that dress looked on her. It literally stole Harry’s breath away. “Breathe,” Louis muttered to him as she entered. His voice felt frozen, and he wondered how on earth he was going to get through vows.

Louis was the only person they told. He closed the office down for the night. Told everyone that planned on working on a Saturday evening that they couldn’t. Something about buffing the floors or tenting for fumigation. But really, Louis was going to marry them as a recently registered online-ordained clerk. They were getting married in Harry’s office because that’s where she told Harry she loved him for the first time. She walked the short distance from the door to where Louis and Harry had moved his desk to the side so they could get married in the setting sunlight. There were a few bouquets of flowers that Harry thought would match the theme of their other wedding in a couple short months.

She held a similar bouquet in her hands. Harry thought she looked like an ancient goddess of sunlight and flowers. Her dress was A-line in structure. A plunging neckline with intricate floral lace on the bodice without any sparkle. The floral lace faded into the flowy skirt and against the setting sun, she looked golden against the pure white dress. She was the most precious thing he had ever seen. She was completely right; he was desperate to see her in this dress. Waiting another few months would have been sinful.

“Hi,” Harry smiled as she stood in front of him.

“Hi,” she giggled. “It doesn’t fit right because it still needs to be altered,” she told him and showed off the back that had a similar plunging neckline but against her back. “I stole all our chip clips,” she smiled excitedly. Harry laughed and shaking his head at her and her adorable antics. “And I won’t have my hair like this.”

Harry hadn’t even noticed that she had her hair down naturally as she always wore it. Her makeup was the same as he saw it each day. Yet somehow it was even more beautiful. “I think y’should,” he murmured.

“Oh?” She smiled. Nodding he scanned her up and down unable to believe she was all his. In a few moments she would be his wife for the rest of their lives and beyond. “You look perfect,” she assured him. Harry always looked handsome. He had plenty of suits due to his job, but there was one he had gotten shortly after getting engaged. He never told her but as she scanned the suit, it fit better than all his other ones, it seemed she realized he got a new one just for this day. Like it was made to be on him and look so perfect on him for this moment.

“Are you ready?” Louis asked quietly. It was their evening, and he didn’t want to spoil it or rush it. But Louis also knew that Harry would spend hours ogling her if he let him.

They both nodded eagerly.

Louis went through the basics, the things that were said at every wedding but they were staring at each other, Harry holding her left hand in both of his while her other hand held her bouquet. “Do you want to do your vows now?” Louis asked.

“I forgot mine,” she admitted.

He shrugged. “They don’t have to be the ones we wrote,” he offered.

She took a deep breath. “Okay, Louis, I’m sorry,” she smiled. He winked at her and she turned her gaze back to Harry. “They’re not going to make any sense if I say them off the top of my head,” she warned.

“S’okay,” he assured her. “M’gonna love you no matter what.”

With another deep breath she started. “I’ve been so lucky to know you since we were kids. Thinking back on it, I’m sure I’ve loved you since we were in college. Having our lives intertwined so obviously seems like fate, in hindsight. But I wouldn’t trade a day of our relationship and every path and twist and hiccup it led us to for anything. There are days where I truly don’t want to do anything but be your wife and just...bask in how perfect it is. I lose all sense of identity and it’s not a bad thing. I am so in love with you it makes me,” she sighed, shaking her head, keeping her gaze on his green eyes that looked golden in the sunlight. “I am so happy to marry you. It might be the best thing I’ve ever done. You make me a better person, you make me happy, you make me feel safe,” she blinked away briefly and laughed. “I didn’t...” she sniffled as she thought of the night that Harry was there to save her and kickstart their romantic relationship. Despite how scared she was at the time; she would be forever grateful for Harry finding her and keeping her safe. Always. “Oops,” she swiped at her cheek and Harry chuckled.

“S’okay,” he promised. She sniffled again, a tear rolling down her cheek.

“I think if I admitted it to myself, I always had a crush on you. Ever since we were young,” he reached for that tear and wiped it away. “You make sure I have medicine when I don’t feel well, and you always make sure I eat. You dance with me in the kitchen, and you don’t mind that I’ve been in pajamas for two days on the weekend. You make me feel like the most beautiful girl in the world,” she paused briefly and squeezed his hand like it was part of the promise she was whispering to him (and Louis). “I’m going to have a crush on you for the rest of our lives and I’m so happy we’re here and I love you very much. I always will. And I will always do everything I can to make you happy.”

Louis looked at Harry pointedly. “I can’t wait to hear what she has to say when she has prep time,” Louis smirked.

Harry rolled his eyes as she giggled, which just made his heart feel warmer than he ever thought possible.

He squeezed her hand. “I feel like I’ve said m’vows a hundred times t’you now. When I told you I loved you for the first time, right here. Then when I proposed. M’going to love you with everything in me. Every single day. M’gonna love you more every day. Somehow. I’ll figure it out, I promise,” he smirked making her giggle. “You mean everything t’me,” he promised. “I don’t care ‘bout money, houses, billable hours, or contracts. The second I think of you, it all goes away. You are my entire world. You make me so happy. Even when I don’t want t’be happy. Y’work tremendously hard t’make our lives easier and happier. T’make me happier. No one has ever done that for me before,” he explained. “I admire you more than anyone on this earth,” her eyes welled with tears again.

“M’going to love you and cherish you and take care of you for as long as we live and then wherever this afterlife takes us,” it truly sounded like a vow. “I want this to be the last time you cry, but seems a bit unrealistic,” he chuckled and wiped at her tears again as she giggled tearily through the words. “M'never going t’be responsible for your sadness, kitten. I promise. M’always going t’be responsible for making y’happy. When y’need me, m’going t’be there. Always. I love you more and more every second and I wish I figured it out sooner than I did,” the only nod to the rough start they had in ages. “But m’glad I figured it out now. Glad I get t’see you in this beautiful dress and hear y’tell me that m’worth it,” he whispered.

“You are,” she mouthed unable to speak.

“I love you,” he repeated. “Forever, and ever.”

Louis cleared his throat awkwardly and shook his head. “Didn’t know you could do that,” he muttered and pinched at the corner of his eyes. She laughed tearily, still but Harry couldn’t help but smile. Louis spoke again, more logistics and legalities. Terms and conditions the pair of them were used to hearing.

Harry was certain he said “I do, I do, I do,” about a hundred times when Louis asked making him and his beautiful girl laugh again.

“And do you take Harry Styles to be your husband?” Louis asked.

Her eyebrows pinched together as she looked at the most perfect man she had ever met. She tilted her head at him. “Are you holding your breath?” She whispered.

“Please say ‘I do,’” he mumbled but he was definitely holding his breath.

She giggled. “I do,” she rolled her eyes. “You idiot.”

“Thank you,” he sighed with relief.

Louis snorted. “Just kiss her already,” he chuckled.

Harry dipped her as if they were dancing in the kitchen at home. His hand unclipping one of the chip clips holding her dress in place. She giggled as his lips sealed over hers. “Congratulations, Mrs. Styles,” he murmured against her mouth when he pulled away slightly.

Louis chuckled, grabbing the clip, and heading for the door to sign the marriage certificate.

She kissed him again, the flowers falling to the floor, and she held his face in both her hands. “I love you, Mr. Styles,” she smiled. She looked so beautiful; it made Harry’s heart ache.

“This was an amazing idea, kitten,” he told her standing her upright, and kissing her again.

“I have those every now and then,” she tucked her face into his chest. Another clip fell off her back.

He laughed and kissed her forehead. “Better get y’home so y’don’t flash Louis on our way out,” he suggested.

She smiled. “Well...I actually brought a change of clothes,” she assured him. “And I may have told Louis to leave the floor locked and leave,” she bit the inside of her lip.

Harry felt warm all over. “Oh?” One of his eyebrows quirked up. His expression hooded as he looked her over.

“I think you got a good view of my dress for now, right? You can wait till spring?” She asked, pulling the last two bag clips off the back of her dress. Without them holding it in place, it draped differently on her body making it fall haphazardly around her torso, dangerously close to revealing some of Harry's favorite physical features of hers.

“I’d like to view it on the floor,” his voice was low and hungry in tone as he scanned her.

She smiled. Turning around, she showed off her zipper. "Unzip me."

--

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[oneatlatime]

The Tales of Ba Sing Se PART 1

Once upon a time in Ba Sing Se, the Gaang got Appa back. The end. Please?

This title sounds rather expositiony, but last episode was already a plot/exposition dump, and a rather dark one at that. So who knows? Not me.

Sokka hun I think you're supposed to shave with a blade slightly less substantial than that.

I am fascinated by the hair loopies. I always thought that they were braided in, but they clip in. Does she have a magnet in her braid that they clip in to? A lego type system?

CAT

Toph's morning routine is uncomfortably close to mine.

I know Toph likes being slobby to stick it to the man, but wouldn't it also help with her spatial awareness if she's always sporting a healthy coating of earth? Maybe she can sense where her limbs are better or something?

"Spa day!" "Do I have to?" UNCOMFORTABLY CLOSE GUYS.

That has got to be torture. How would you like a pumice stone to the eyeballs?

Now THAT'S a healthy coating of earth.

You're not usually into that stuff? You got dolled up last episode.

Are there voice acting awards? Because whoever voiced these guys needs one. I have never in my life heard such perfectly distilled middle school clique bitch impression.

That's cathartic.

Katara's smothering/mothering tendencies usually annoy me, but it's a good thing those means girls happened when Katara was around, because this calls for serious hugs. I almost want to say that it's out of character to see Toph not be 100% sure of herself, but I think it adds character instead.

Do you think anyone's ever told Toph before that she's really pretty? Ever?

That's a good hug.

Is this short stories? Like an anthology? TALES of Ba Sing Se. Like day in the life? Ok. I'm going to break this up for ease of reading/writing.

The Tale of Iroh

If Iroh hadn't distinguished himself by making the best tea in the city, he would have come to everyone's attention anyway by single handedly fixing everyone's personal problems.

Bending soccer. Why didn't I think of that?

His voice is funny in this scene. Also isn't honour a fire nation thing?

One of my absolute favourite things about Iroh is that his philosophical side is always balanced out by a practical side. He's always philosophising but he's also always grounded. Sometimes hightailing it is what needs doing. Sometimes your sister is crazy and needs to go down.

You know you're bad at crime when your poor stance actually offends the guy you're mugging.

I also like how Iroh really doesn't moralise. He'll teach this guy what conditions the moonflower likes; he'll teach this guy how to mug better. Knowledge is for sharing, no judgment attached!

Random mugger speedruns Zuko's arc.

So pretty. It's been a while since there's been good pretty.

oh shit

ok

Now I have questions!

The Tale of Aang

Writers take note: You see this sad face? You see what you've done to my boy? You can reverse it with one simple trick! GIVE HIM APPA BACK.

I love this. Can't help Appa, so Aang helps every other animal in Ba Sing Se instead.

I want to know what this is. Monkey panther?

I didn't realise until now how tall platypus bears were.

CABBAGE GUY! HI!

Actual dragonflies. Punny.

I love these. My nomination for cutest atla animal.

I hope that wasn't required agricultural land. Should have put the zoo near the drill instead. That land already looked close to salted.

This was some Toph level bending. Love to see Aang's skills progress.

Turtle seal's got competition for cutest animal.

Just call this portion the petting zoo and it's a win.

The Tale of Sokka

Something I don't talk about enough is Sokka's supernatural skill with that boomerang. The realistic explanation is that he's spent every spare minute since receiving it honing his skills by chucking it at random piles of snow, but I like to think he's a boomerang bender. Actually wouldn't boomerang bending be a manifestation of latent airbending tendencies?

I make this face at lasagne.

I may have to make another Sokka's Stupid Faces post.

There is nothing oaflike about falling out of a window and into a Haiku. He was even polite about it!

Somebody introduce Sokka to flyting.

Forget about being a warrior, Aang needs to end this war yesterday so that Sokka can go be a poet. Warrior poet. He's way too creative to waste on cannon fodder.

Poetry bouncer. The longer I think about that the funnier it gets.

Betrayed by hubris.

A Poetry bouncer. Who comes up with this stuff? How do you come up with that? I keep thinking about a poetry bouncer and I keep giggling.

I'm breaking this post here as I'm reaching the image limit. Part 2 coming immediately!

[depressedhatakekakashi]

Hatake Kakashi

Kakashi is known for being a pretty cool and aloof kind of guy, but in one of the first few chapters we get this gem.

I'm unsure if this is Anime only or appears in the Manga as well, but either way I love me a dorky man (Seriously, i do. I married a punny man, this is right up my ally)

2) When Kakashi noticed Sasuke freaking out in the Land of Waves arc he takes a moment to assure his student that he'll do everything in his power to protect them, including dying if he has to. It's not a necessary thing to say, but Kakashi understands that his kids have been put on a mission way over their heads and they need support. In this instance, he supports Sasuke with a verbal promise. Later on in the same mission, after Zabuza and Haku's death, he supports Naruto by allowing his student to cling to him (holding onto his pant leg) and by supporting him when he calls Zabuza and Haku 'pretty cool'.

3) Just his general cool attitude towards Gai. Kakashi's never closed off to his friend, but he acts relaxed, and in their first few scenes together he can be seen asking Gai to repeat himself, to which Gai responds by talking about how 'cool' Kakashi is. I love this because up until this point, we've seen Kakashi as hyper-aware and although he's aloof he always seems to know what's going on around him. Then in comes Gai and he can play the 'sorry I wasn't paying attention' Card and I personally love that for him.

4) Teaching Sakura the Qi release technique. I know it's off-screen and only mentioned when she uses it, but I love that Kakashi found a moment to teach Sakura something that he didn't teach either of the boys. It highlights his ability to see potential in his students and to teach them useful things (even off screen) that they can make use of later.

5) How he protects his student. whether it's protecting Sasuke from Orochimaru by placing himself between them, protecting Sakura from enemy shinobi by killing them in one easy hit, or even guarding his friend's students as he does when Kakazu tries to attack Ino-Shika-Cho. I love that Kakashi's 'I will protect my precious people' isn't just words. that he really holds true to that and actually does everything he can to try and protect them. I love that he turns and walks away from Tsunade while she's demanding he go on a mission because he needs to go after Naruto and Sasuke. He needs to protect them. I love that he outright ignores Hiruzen's plan to send a letter to Danzo because he knows Tenzo is in danger, and instead he heads into root without any backup and only a plan to rescue someone he calls a friend. I especially love that through all of this, with him always being protective of others, Kakashi fights back-to-back with Gai and allows Gai to protect him. He won't accept protection from his students as a rule, or even from any of his other comrades that we see, but when he's fighting with Gai it's equal forces of protection/willingness to be protected. It's such a nice balance that I love to see.

6) I love that he recognizes Sai needs someone to reach out to him, and he offers that support and encouragement that Sai really hasn't heard from anyone else. and he does it in such a simple way. By saying 'I believe in you' and allowing Sai to hear that he is trusted. That he's relied on.

7) I adore that after years of being a good soldier and even giving up even more of his time to be a Hokage, Kakashi finally gets to just be a dork. I enjoy that he goes on Vacation with Gai and acts like a child. That he takes part in their usual competitions with the same energy (just shown in a much different way) as Gai, and he gets upset when Gai won't admit that he won their game of ping pong, showing that he really does care about their competitions and that he does like winning.

8) I love that he's gentle, even when he doesn't really have time to be. A great example of this is when he finds the Konoha boys laying asleep on the road (after Sakura knocked them out) and he takes a few moments to put them off to the side where they can be more comfortable and just a bit safer. I love that he apologized to them for not sticking around or helping more because he really did have to go, but he still found time to at least make sure they weren't laying in the middle of the dang road.

9. Kamuing away Diedra’s arm. A small moment but a brilliant way to introduce Kamui into the world. I love how Kakashi thinks in this scenario. ‘I have a problem. How do i solve this problem? I know! I’ll rip off his arm!’ Brilliant, beautiful, perfection.

10. (Book only) ramming his face into Gai’s ass in Kakashi Hidan. This poor man has suffered so much and now he must suffer me laughing his ass off. Also, talking up Gai before he swoops in to rescue him and then getting annoyed when Gai starts talking about how he understands what it’s like to have a ‘genius rival’. He was so done and i want to hug him. Actually most of that book has perfect moments. Both of his books did i NEED MORE

11. (Kakashi retsuden) ‘i’m not going to apologize for hiding who i am’ ya? And you’re gonna troll your little fanboy by sending him a book with your face on it as the big admission that yes, you are in fact the Sixth Hokage he looks up to? I love you you shit.

12: lamenting Redaku not having an Onsen because he just wants to soak in the nice warm water. Let my man rest.

13. Accidentally letting his cloth’s brush against the tent and thus waking up all the shinobi he hasn’t already knocked out, all because he got distracted thinking of a proud Iruka.

14: (anime only) forgetting he’s disguised as Sukea and almost giving himself away because Houki gushed about how cool he thinks Lord Sixth is.

15. Everything about kid Kakashi. Arrogance, brattiness, the full energy of an angry kid who has already lost so much and is trying so hard to protect himself from more hurt (only to fail because he genuinely cares). Man, i just want to give him a hug.

16. His arrogance. It Definitely eases a bit as he gets older, but once in a while that arrogance and confidence really shines through and i love it. Example: when he called 50 jonin rank shinobi ‘fifty nobodies’ because they posed absolutely no threat to him. Or how he confidently told Naruto he hadn’t even used his Mangekyo Sharingan against Kakazu because he didn’t feel the threat was big enough for that (straight shot to Kakazu’s pride if he’d been alive to hear that)

17: (Anime only) how he jumped over his desk to grab Iruka’s hand’s when Iruka’s words helped him realize a solution to his problem. This was a KakaIru’s dream moment and just adorable as all heck!

18: how just… dramatic he can be. Need to make an entrance into the chunin exam’s with Sasuke? A sudden appearance with leaves floating around them should do it! Want the enemy to believe they killed you? Throw your whole damned body into it my man or it’s simply not believable. Like seriously, he did not need to be this dramatic with his ‘death’ in the land of waves arc. It was over the top and i love it.

19: (anime only) cutting lightning specificlly to save Gai. It wasb’t a test of strength or ability. Kakashi saw danger and faced down a lightning bolt to protect Gai. One of his precious people. It’s a really sweet moment of him admitting to himself that he cares about Gai and wants to keep him safe, and it’s bad ass to see him slice lighting with his chidori,

20: stopping Kakazu’s lightning with just his hands to protect Team Ten. Shikamaru, Choji and Ino were surprised by Kakashi’s decision to place himself between them and Kakazu’s attack and who can blame them? Man faced a lightning attack head on and stopped it using only his hands. No jutsu’s, no fancy last second plan. Just his hands. It was awesome.

I love a lot about Kakashi, but these are some of my favorite things. Through all of his faults and mistakes, he really is just trying. He wants to be kind, he wants to help, and he knows he's limited in what he can do but damn it he's still going to do his best.

[kairiscorner]

just had an idea 👀👀 okok picture this- the spiderteens making spiderperson!reader do tiktok dances with em but tHHEEEENNN one of em (maybe hobie 🤭🤭) mentions a tiktok dance and they get (more like force) reader to do it with miguel 👀👀👀👀

up to you whatever tiktok dances or trends you want em to do 😌😌

~ 🫐

OMG THAT REMINDS ME OF THE 'MAKING MIGGY DANCE WET THE BED' FIC I MADE ... but i want him to do the 'say so' dance this time :3

(reblogs are greatly appreciated, it helps get my content out there! if you guys like what you see, please reblog it too <:D)

miguel o'hara x spider person!reader doing tiktok dances

"no." "c'mon, please?" "no." "pretty please with a cherry on top?" "with extra sprinkles?" "and a stick of dynamite up your ass?" "no, no, no, and–no."

you grumbled as pavitr frowned and hobie chuckled, wrapping his arm around the boy's shoulder and trying to cheer him up with a 'punny' joke he came up with on the spot. you took miguel's hand as he huffed and looked away from you. "miggy, you can't say no to this! i'll make you do karaoke with me next time if you don't dance with me today." you threatened him as you contorted your face into a pouty look with furrowed eyebrows—mocking him as his grumpy face just even grumpier. he sighed as he yanked his arm out of your grasp. "not like i'll go with you anyway." "then how come we got you to sing 'un poco loco' with peter b on jess' birthday?" "that was part of the itinerary." "you singin wasn't..." you corrected him as miguel pinched his nose bridge—his angry pout looking angrier and angrier, but soon mellowing out into a more peaceful calm as he breathed in and nodded slowly.

"that's all i'm gonna admit, though." he said as he let his guard down gradually, and you took advantage of this and took him by the fingers and dragged him all the way to the front of your phone where the song 'say so' by doja cat was playing. miguel was stuttering and stammering, with gwen and pav whooping, with miles giving miguel a pretty surprised look—and with hobie yelling out a, "c'mon, ya geezer, be fun for once!" miguel sighed as you took your place next to him, with him hiding behind you a little, whispering in your ear, "i am replacing you once this is over." "then we'll keep the dance going on and on and on then, miggy." you teased him as you played the song again, and taught him the dance as the camera was rolling, unbeknownst to him. miguel awkwardly and stiffly followed your movements at first, but eventually getting himself lost in the rhythm as he danced to the beat—ignoring the cheers of the four kids and just admiring how graceful and carefree you seemed while dancing; smiling and laughing when you made mistakes, but keeping the rhythm going nonetheless.

every time you did the punch rolling and focus movements, you always got so close to miguel—bringing your faces a mere few inches apart, always catching him off guard. it brought chuckles to your voice and smiles to your face whenever you'd see the way his eyes'd widen and his pout would get poutier after you pull away. when you did the last part, 'why don't you say so?', you did the hand gestures and body movements so enthusiastically that miguel stepped backwards. and at the end, just to add an element of surprise at the end of your tiktok, you planted a kiss on miguel's nose.

a soft little whimper escaped this man's full, plush lips subconsciously—making you giggle and get flustered, rushing over to stop the video as pav and gwen cheered for you two, with miles giving you both heart hands as hobie kept mouthing 'the big wanker's a red flag, but that was cute,' with a huge smile on his face as miguel looked at you with a stunned expression—not knowing if this was your intention for getting him to dance with you, or if it was all just in the spur of the moment. either way, he couldn't help himself from constantly rubbing the spot on his nose where you gently pecked at him with your soft lips. he might ask you himself next time if there was a new tiktok trend you might wanna try... one that involved some kissing, maybe...

tags !! @miguelswifey04 @hearts4gabri @hisachuu @wreakingmarveloushavok @fictarian @yuridopted0 @simsrandomstuff @luvstarrstruck @popeheywardssecretgf @meeom @arachnoia @melovetitties @fable-library @ophanimgold @smokeywhalee @capnshtfce

[rebelfell]

One last Halloween blurb inspired by @superblysubpar and her unbelievable series We’ll Call it Love. I’m convinced that modern!Eddie would be a punny Halloween guy without fail (assuming he wasn’t dressing up with you 😘) 18+ MDNI

“Wait, you’re a what? I don’t get it.”

Eddie sighed heavily at Jeff’s blank stare as he plopped down his guitar case, the last bit of what all he and the band had to lug into the bar. The opener was on now, which meant they only had maybe thirty minutes before they had to be ready to haul their equipment out on stage and get set up. Four bands were playing at this party tonight, but Corroded Coffin was slated to go on third—which basically meant they were headlining.

Or at least headlining adjacent.

The band, much like the rest of his friends, much like the rest of this damn city, didn’t “get” his costume. So far tonight, he’d been met with nothing but a string of perplexed expressions, furrowed brows and pursed lips and slow blinks as they tried to decipher what he was going for.

At least he had a real costume and hadn’t gone along with the rest of the band’s plan to hit up a Spirit Halloween and overpay for shitty grease paint and rubbery prosthetics. Gareth’s face was streaked green and his hair was slicked back so he looked like something that vaguely resembled a zombie. Or a very, very discounted Elphaba. 

Jeff was just “guy with a knife in his head” and Lloyd was fucking late—which was the exact same costume he wore almost every day.

Eddie’s outfit might have been confusing, but at least it wasn’t boring. And, yeah, maybe it was kind of a reach. But he didn’t think it was that much of a head scratcher.

He’d teased up his hair so it was bigger and more wild than normal, and he’d added a pair of fake wolf ears he had from…a different costume. From a very different party. He’d let his beard grow out until it was short and scruffy and then whitened it with baby powder, which was also gonna be real nice when he started sweating buckets under those stage lights.

For clothes, he’d borrowed Steve’s letterman jacket under which he wore a white dress shirt and a blue tie, and topped it off with square black rimmed glasses. He’d also dappled some brown eyeshadow from Nancy on the backs of his hands to make it look like they were hairy. The effect was pretty impressive, especially coupled with some beige press-on nails he used for claws.

He looked fucking great and it had yet to be acknowledged by anyone. Philistines.

“Whatever, man,” Eddie groaned. “I’m gonna get a beer and maybe you guys will have found some damn culture by the time I get back!”

He pushed through the curtain blocking off the area behind the stage from the rest of the bar and jumped down off the low platform, still calling out to Jeff over his shoulder.

“And text Lloyd, tell him I’m gonna wring his—”

Eddie’s threat dwindled into a grunt as he banged into someone. Hard. So hard that he stumbled and only just barely managed to stay upright. Unfortunately, he couldn’t say the same for his target. They were off to the side of the stage, at least. No chance of being trampled. Most of the crowd was still milling around the bar and only a handful were actually up front already. Probably friends or family members of the band currently screaming their way through a cover of Thriller.

A flurry of shapes and color blurred his vision as he whipped his head around upon colliding with whoever had the bad luck to step in his path. Glass shattered and the sound made him wince as he looked down at the heap of limbs in front of him. Rather nice looking limbs, he noted.

“Fuck, fuck. Are you okay? I’m so sorry—shit.”

He quickly knelt down and scrambled to help the poor girl back on her feet. She was in a shiny red velvet cape draped over a dress with a black satin skirt and Eddie had to tear his eyes away from staring at the expanse of her fishnet-covered thighs revealed by her costume riding up. As she stood, his eyes went wide at the sight of her and not just because she was kiiiiiiind of a total smoke show. In addition to bright eyes and a nice smile, there was a massive gash on her face with blood dribbling down her temple. This was no Spirit Halloween bullshit—this looked real.

Painfully real.

“Oh, shit! Fuck me, did I do that?” he asked, panic rising in his voice.

“Huh? Oh! No, no, not at all!”

She laughed and the sound came out pretty melodious considering she was hemorrhaging. Eddie watched in horror as she reached up a hand and touched it to the gooey looking wound, only to reveal her fingers were sparkling clean when she pulled them away.

“It’s not real, I did it myself,” she said. “I take it as a compliment you thought it was, though.”

“Shit, yeah—you should, sweetheart!” 

He stared blatantly at the wound, partlybecause it was fascinating and partly because he was afraid if he looked in her eyes for too long he might drown in them.

“You did that yourself?” he whistled. “It looks disgusting.”

Her lips twitched slightly as she tried (and failed) not to smirk at him. Eddie pinched the bridge of his nose as he registered what he had just said. Smooth, Munson. Smooth as cottage cheese.

“I, uh, I meant…it’s impressive, you know? It’s really good. That’s no Spirit Halloween bullshit.”

She grinned at that and tilted her head to the side. “Thanks,” she said, a little pride rising in her voice. “I do special effects make-up for a living. I did this as a test for this indie horror flick and I liked how it came out, so I wanted to reuse it.”

“Holy shit,” Eddie breathed. “That’s pretty fucking metal. It looks so real. Can I, uh…”

He trailed off, realizing just a second too late how awkward what he’d been about to ask was. He didn’t know of any hard and fast rule about this, but he kind of figured asking to fondle a perfect stranger's fake wound was verboten by the Miss Manners Guide to Halloween.

This girl didn’t seem phased in the least, though. She smiled again and tipped her chin up, staring boldly into his eyes. “It’s okay,” she said softly. “You can touch it. I won’t bite.”

You won’t, but I sure might.

Eddie had to swallow hard to stop the line from bursting from his lips. He carefully reached out his hand to brush it along her forehead. Ugh, it even felt real. That was sick. He loved it.

Heart hammering in his chest, he traced the shape of the gash with his fingertips and let them trail gently down the side of her face as he followed a rivulet of fake blood that dripped down to her chin. His fingers tingled wherever they met her skin and he was so caught up in the feeling, he forgot for a second he was wearing press-on nails and was now stroking her face with them. Cheeks tinged fiercely pink, he retracted his hand and cleared his throat nervously.

“So you’re…Red Riding Hood?”

“Yeah,” she nodded. “After the wolf got me.”

Eddie chanced a glance down at the rest of her costume, hoping it didn’t look like he was ogling her. He was, a little, but only like 20%.

Okay, 30%.

It appeared she’d taken the basic outfit and accessories from a party store and modified them—adding rips and tears to her clothes, streaking them with dirt and fake blood, even placing a couple twigs in her hair like she’d just been chased through the woods. There was some bruising painted on her and another impressively realistic looking set of claw marks raked across her chest. Her rather lovely chest…

He jerked his head up, cheeks even more flushed after realizing his eyes had lingered just a little too long. She didn’t seem to mind though.

“So…are you here with someone?” she asked with a quick glance around. Her voice was low and heady, there was no mistaking her intentions.

“No, no one,” Eddie said hurriedly. “Just friends, I mean.”

And in probably the worst show of judgment since that double shot of tequila he'd done at Nancy’s, Eddie chose that exact moment to look up and search for his friends in the crowd. It was easy to do, he could see Robin at the bar waiting for a drink. And when he glanced further back, he was pretty sure that was Steve making his way over dressed as…oh no. Oh no, no no.

Ozzy help him, this was gonna be a long night.

Eddie brought his gaze back to Red, his eyes now big and round with worry. “I, ahhh…shit, I have to go?” he said. “I can’t really explain right now. But my band is playing later—are you staying?” 

He prayed to the Halloween gods and all that was unholy she was. She nodded, giving him a little wink that actually made his knees shake. 

“I’ll be here,” she said. “Unless another big bad wolf gets me.”

“Okay…good.” 

Eddie’s voice deepened and he flashed a sly smile, channeling all the wolfish energy he could from his costume. With a decisive nod, he jumped into action, hoping he wouldn’t have to do too much damage control. And concerned as he was, he couldn’t help beaming at the last words called out to him as he made his way through the crowd.

“See you around, Teen Wolf Blitzer!”

[fushitism]

the chemistry in my brain is altered in unspeakable ways whenever i think about Sans.

JUST WHO EXACTLY IS THIS GUY

its so easy, almost too easy, not to take him seriously and its exactly why his character can often be, well, i wouldn't say overlooked, this guy's pretty popular, but his traits tend to be.... diluted?? simplified??? for lack of better words..?

like yeah, he likes ketchup. yeah, he's laid-back n "lazy". yeah, he's a punny guy. yeah, he goes above n beyond for his brother's happiness... but what else?

do we even know much about papyrus? that guy's whole deal deserves a whole separate post!

CAN WE PLEEAAASE RECALL HOW THIS PIECE OF LORE WAS CASUALLY (in true toby fox fashion) SENT TO OUR EMAILS ?? NEVER TO BE ELABORATED UPON EVER AGAIN

why'd sans have to pull a sock incident on us at a time like this </3

PAPYRUS DID NOT MEAN IT SO LITERALLY AND YOU KNOW THAT, SANS, YOU JUST WANTED TO BE A LITTLE SHIT!!!!!!

their life before snowdin.. oh what i'd give to hear all about it...

this got me thinking, though.

we know sans likely has an affinity for quantum physics, temporal complexities and astronomy (though the latter is irrelevant to the point i'll be making)

he can teleport for God's sake why are we so unfazed by that

aaaanywho,

so like his Workshop. the one with the broken machine, yeah. look at what toby's once said abt it

why would they (who i assume r alphys + sans ?) try so hard to fix it? it's not like its the CORE (the machine said to be the source of all power 4 the undergound)

what's so important about this rusty, clanky pile of scrap metal?

....

haha lol, remember this?

remember this (x2)?

there's an abstract them here, and its clear he's not talking abt papyrus, frisk or even the player if we were to try n reach so hard.

could it be he is refereing to those in the picture with him?

if so, they must really mean a lot to him

so let's get this straight:

- we know the skelebros were NEW additions to snowdin

- we know they had an OLD life, the picture at the workshop further proving sans also had a social circle, one beyond frisk's recognition which totally strikes me as odd, given this child has been ambushed by almost all monsters at that point

- sans knows about timelines. sans messes with time and space. it's heavily hinted sans has worked in quantum physics (the book[s] found at his place) and he apparently also has some abandoned, broken machine in his workshop (one of which he's presumably tinkered with)

- as a lost soul (but also in geno), sans demonstrates his intense defeatism and resignation saying this like,

.... is sans trying to go back somewhere? do the skelebros come from a different world? a grassy place? r the residents of said place related to the picture in any way? does sans miss them? were they family? friends? lovers?! whoooooooo!1!!1 when!!! where!!!!! what is going on, toby!!!! PLEASEHWHWUE

[inhale]

but you know what, this is fine. pssssh, we don't need any of these answered, haha! no waaay! because while the UT fandom's in up in flames about such matters, toby's probably out there drawing yet another sans x reigen art piece to dish out when we least expect it (please let it be on my biryhday please let it be on my birthd)

[adobe-outdesign]

Will you review the Maraquan pets? I think Buzz is my favorite based on design, and there are so many really creative/punny ones. Personally, I’ve never liked Wocky.

Maraqua is probably one of Neopets' most distinct lands given that it's, you know, underwater. The idea of making a color that fits with the Atlantis-esq aesthetic just makes logical sense, and the actual designs tend to be pretty cool. I like how there's actual thought put into how [X] Neopet would function if it was adapted to life underwater, with the bubbling pit area vaguely implying it might be a natural mutation (given the amount of "painted" Maraquan pets we see in Maraqua).

Maraquan also didn't do too badly with customization, mostly because they're not compatible with normal clothing anyway so the poses are at least somewhat distinct. That said, it is weird that they changed the poses at all; they already have to have clothing drawn specifically for them, so why force things like fists onto some of them? It's so weird.

Even weirder is the seemingly arbitrary decisions regarding which ones got UC versions; Maraquan Chombys barely changed at all yet somehow got a UC, while Maraquan Zafaras changed drastically but never got a UC. What gives?

(I can't count it on the favorites list because there are too many good still-obtainable Maraquan pets, but shoutout to the unconverted Maraquan Zafara for being one of my favorite Maraquan pets. Shame it's no more.)

Favorite Species:

Gelert: While the unconverted Maraquan Zafara is my all-time favorite Maraquan pet, the Maraquan Gelert is a very close second, and is definitely my fav if we're talking pets that are still obtainable. I love Maraquan pets where the design is just abstract, taking cues from various sea creatures without being a 1:1 parallel of them, and the Gelert is particularly beautiful in this respect. It plays with the Gelert's long ears and tails by making it vaguely eel-ish—adding in a back fin, a few spots, and a lovely green and purple color scheme.

The UC version is particularly gorgeous, having this lovely flow that curves back from the head and leads straight into the curled tail. The converted version is still fine, as it's a fairly accurate recreation all things considered, but the pose is much more awkward (the body suggests an S shape, but the paws and ears are going opposite directions and the chest sticks out too much).

It does, however, at least fix the shading; for some reason the UC Maraquan Gelert has one layer of shading with no highlights or shadows to speak of, which is really weird. (See the above, which is an edit I made years ago that just adds the layers of shading that the actual UC is missing. The lineart should also probably be thinner but I digress.) Anyway, the point is that both are beautiful designs.

Uni: Maraquan Uni are also really beautiful. Similar to a Peophin (arguably too much so, but hey, there's no Maraquan Peophin at the time of writing anyway), they've swapped their legs for a tail and their wings and mane have become fins themselves, with a pretty curved horn and some subtle striping to boot. Even better, the converted version is basically the same as the old art, so there's no difficulty in obtaining one (other than the PB cost, of course).

Lutari: While there are still a lot of great abstract Maraquan designs that I love (Eyrie, Draik, etc.), I have to give a shoutout to the Lutari for being a really great design based off of an obvious animal (in this case, an axolotl). The cream and pink color scheme is lovely, and I love the subtle mottle gradients on its limbs. The multiple sets of ears forming the gills is fantastic, the tail is pretty, the black claws add contrast, and it still reads really clearly as a Lutari despite the animal influence. Really good stuff.

Least Favorite Species:

Kacheek: The Maraquan Kacheek just looks incredibly uncanny to me. The best Maraquan pets are either ambiguous or choose an animal that fits the Neopet, but here they just... took a Kacheek head and slapped it on a goldfish body??? Don't like that at all. The head in isolation isn't terrible and I could see it working on a more Kacheek-ish torso, but this... no. At least it's nicely drawn on a technical level, I suppose?

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

trick or treat! what would you do if the Friend (the doctor one) showed up at your door asking trick or treat

Be pretty weirded out by the time travel I think

Have a punny tattoo

[wonderfulworldofmichaelford]

Psycho Analysis: Syndrome

(WARNING! This analysis contains SPOILERS!)

In one of the earliest episodes of Psycho Analysis, I discussed the villain of Incredibles II, Evelyn Deavor. Evelyn is just a genuinely awful twist villain for not only being completely obvious, but for having a nonsensical and impersonal motive that makes her look like a vindictive idiot. And while there is so much wrong with her, things I detailed in that review (though probably not quite as well as I would now after doing this for a few years), there is one big issue that holds her back, one that no villain in her shoes could avoid: She’s standing in the shadow of a chubby ginger nerd with a Heat Miser hairdo.

Syndrome (real name Buddy Pine) is really something else when it comes to Pixar villains. While not the first to be genuinely, irredeemably evil—Hopper was already right there—he had a lot of things that the grasshopper lacked. For one, we get to see Syndrome’s backstory and how he ended up becoming the way that he is. But more importantly, Syndrome just has a much more stylish presentation that elevates him to being what I consider Pixar’s very best villain.

Motivation/Goals: Over the course of his many, many evil monologues, Syndrome paints a pretty vivid picture of why he is the way he is. It begins with his initial monologue to Bob, where he recounts the faithful night Bob cruelly rejected him and told him to fly home. Only… there’s one teensy little detail missing from the recap. A very French detail.

Yes, Buddy’s memory proves to be extremely self-serving, as he ignores Bob was at the time dealing with the terrorist and “World’s Greatest Punny Supervillain Name” winner Bomb Voyage to paint himself as a poor, innocent victim of a dismissive and cruel super. Note also how his posture in his version has him with arms wide open as Bob cruelly looks down upon him. All of this goes to show that his big desire for revenge, a core aspect of his motivation, is just completely fabricated by his warped, evil mind. I think he really was just looking for an excuse to go on a killing spree and Bob telling him to stop endangering his own life inadvertently created the world’s first super-school shooter.

Syndrome later elaborates on his evil scheme, because simple revenge isn’t all he’s about (it’s just really nice he gets to take it, that’s all). In another monologue, he details how his murderous robot was meticulously created so that he could fabricate the perfect deadly enemy for him to beat in a staged fight, thus turning himself into a beloved superhero and winning the public’s adoration and respect. With every other hero dead by his hands, he could now soak in all the attention he wanted, and then when he’s old he’d sell off all his tech creating a world where everyone is super (meaning, in his words, that “no one will be”). Syndrome’s initial scheme is very ego-driven and narcissistic, which honestly makes it perfect for a campy supervillain like him.

Of course, he ends up having one more plan when everything else goes awry: Steal Jack-Jack and raise him as his own. This is actually a nice recycling of his cameo from a deleted opening scene for the movie, where he was actually an old enemy who tried to kidnap Violet as a child and who ends up dying in a horrible explosion for trying to fuck with Bob and Helen’s kid (seems they liked that fate for him, because they kept that too). It’s pretty demented as far as a backup plan goes, but it certainly fits him.

Performance: Beloved Kevin Smith collaborator, former Scientologist, and Dave Seville actor Jason Lee is genuinely the perfect sort of guy to voice a villain who comes off as incredibly comedic, but he also gets to show off some really good range when it’s time for Buddy to drop the laughably evil schtick and dip into being a smug, sinister supervillain. All in all, he gives us the exact sort of Silver Age supervillain hamminess to keep you engaged even as he dips deeper and deeper into horrifyingly evil actions.

Final Fate: You’d think that after nearly dying from a bomb getting caught on it as a child, Syndrome would ditch the cape. You’d think that, being a former hero worshiper who absolutely had to know that Edna Mode was the hero designer, he’d be aware of her stance on capes in costume design and would ditch the cape. But no, Syndrome apparently really wanted that classic hero look, and as all truly stylish men must do, he paid the price for looking good. The price in this case is being sucked into a jet turbine where he was shredded into a fine paste before whatever was left violently exploded in a massive fireball, but hey, that's what you get for ignoring Edna's fashion advice.

Best Scene: I think his introductory scene when he fully reveals himself to Bob is, ahem, incredible, especially on repeat viewings. From the chilling moment where he makes Bob aware of his true identity to his warped self-victimizing recap of Bob rejecting him to getting caught monologuing and then tossing Bob away by accident, it takes the nerdy little fanboy from the opening and recontextualizes him as a laughably evil mad scientist who is at the same time an extremely disturbed murderer with a horrifyingly personal vendetta.

Best Quote: Syndrome has some of the best quotes in the movie this side of Edna, and he drops a good 50% of the film’s most iconic and quotable lines. But the one bit of dialogue that sticks out to me personally is the one he drops during his big (re)entrance into the film, where he makes Bob realize who he is by simply saying, “After all… I am your biggest fan.” It’s so simple and bone-chilling and really sets the mood of the film going forward.

Final Thoughts & Score: Syndrome is just really an amalgamation of everything great you could have in a villain in this particular type of movie.

On the superhero movie side, he’s obviously taking a lot of inspiration from envy-driven tech geniuses like Lex Luthor and Dr. Doom. He has a personal grudge against the hero, and is determined to use his technological prowess to outdo them and show the world he’s better than the supermen. Of course, Syndrome takes it to an entirely unhinged level by being an unrepentant serial killer, but he’s very much still in the spirit of those aforementioned supervillains. Much like them, and as previously mentioned, his version of the events that led to his rebirth as a villain are very skewed to paint him more as a victim, with his take being how he was unfairly treated by his idols rather than as some obnoxious nuisance who could have been severely hurt or killed and whose bumbling led to a disastrous chain of events. It seems very much in the same vein as the stories where Doom blames Reed for however badly his face is scarred, or Lex blaming Superman for making him bald. Syndrome just takes these classic comic book tropes and mashes them together into one fantastic package. Now if only he somehow involved super-intelligent gorillas in his plans...

Now let’s look at the James Bond side, because everything from the score to the island lair to the evil henchmen are pure Bond villain territory. Syndrome has Bond Villain Stupidity down to an art form; even when he points out being “caught monologuing,” he still does it multiple times where he otherwise has the titular family dead to rights. He had ample opportunity to kill them several times, only to end up with egg on his face because the heroes managed to use his time gloating to form a real plan of escape. And then there’s his death which, again, is caused because he felt like gloating instead of just fucking leaving. He even has a sexy henchwoman who betrays him for the incredibly sexy Chad of a hero, though Bob doesn’t need her pussy when he has it galore at home. Syndrome wouldn’t feel too out of place going up against Jimmy B, if I’m being honest; nothing Syndrome does is any sillier than Moonraker.

I think what’s truly impressive is just how they managed to balance Syndrome being utterly vile and absolutely hilarious, which is no easy task and can lead to a villain being insufferable rather than entertaining. Syndrome has some great jokes, great body language, and the voice of Jason Lee, a voice that exudes comedic energy in every syllable; he also nonchalantly orders children to be murdered, gambles his henchwoman’s life just to call Bob’s bluff, tries to kidnap a baby, and is basically what would happen if H. H. Holmes had robots. It’s such an amazing combination of traits and it all gels together into one of the best and most fun superhero movie villains ever crafted.

Yeah, that’s right. He’s one of the best superhero movie villains. This man easily clears most of Marvel and DC’s movie villains, and deserves every single point of that 10.5/10 I’m giving him. He’s Pixar’s best villain, and exactly the sort of fun, campy, yet ultimately deadly and threatening bad guy that all superhero movies deserve. Literally no part of The Incredibles is lacking, so why should the villain be any different, right? If only the sequel could have kept up even half the energy… Maybe if they’d given Evelyn Snow Miser’s hair, she’d have been a better villain.

[fictional-idol-tournament]

The two idols with the most votes will go on to compete against the two idols with the most votes from Part 2 of the Love Live! pre-liminary round. The two winners of that will compete in the bracket.

Propaganda under the cut:

Yoshiko Tsushima

- she's very cute and funny (❁´◡`❁) I love the chuuni idol concept! and also that she can find a nice compromise between standing on the stage and finding a place that she can belong, since she's got some pretty niche interests but thanks to finding a place with muse she doesn't have to hide these things anymore and can embrace them instead and I think that's a really nice message. and then especially in the new anime that doubles down on that concept of celebrating her uniqueness I think she's very inspiring and that is what idols set out to do, isn't it? inspire hope in their audience. and if that comes in the form of taking on the persona of a fallen angel and falling dramatically out of trees and even talking to her childhood friend who is an oversized dog, then so be it

Kasumi Nakasu

No propaganda submitted.

Rina Tennouji

- She struggles so much with expressing herself in her daily life but puts her all into performing. She’s so lonely but figured out how to connect to others through her music and performing. She was also the first Nijigaku girl in the anime to have a proper stage performance. Please I love her so much

- autusm 👍(just making sure she's on the bracket, I figure she's among the first 10 Tumblr would think of but I am not taking chances)

Riko Sakurauchi

- i had a crush on her when i was 12-13 , shes very nice :]

Nico Yazawa

- nico nico nii~

Ai Miyashita

- Funny punny jock idol from Nijigasaki, all of her songs are heart poundingly energetic and her dancing is super fun to watch and dance along!