#and I need to start editing my note I'm too scared to check and see when second draft is due

[couldeatthatgirlforlunch]

If you are up for it could write more Justice League x Assistant reader?

That scenario did things to me honestly, and I can't find anything similar 😭

Maybe reader calls in sick and the each JL member goes to check on them unanounced (reader never told them were they lived but of course they'd know *sideeyes batman*) which end up on all the members questioning and pointing at each other *cue spider man meme*, because why are you at my darling's- I mean our Assistant's house!

Reader kicks everyone out except the gourmet chef batman brought to cook reader some chicken soup.

A Day in Life: In Health and Sickness

Synopsis: A day in life were you, the Justice League's assistant, find out that sickness and a bunch of obsessed superheroes are just too much to bear all at once.

Pairing: Yandere!Justice League X Assistant!Gn!Reader; Platonic!Alfred Pennyworth

Tw: Nonconsensual (not sexual) touching; A single mention of obscene acts; Kinda breaking and entering; Reader gets physically restrained; Kinda forced infantilization? But not really, just humiliation; Some members of the League might be out of character bc I don't know them well enough; I was sleepy while revising and editing this so I might fix any mistakes I didn’t see later; English is not my 1st language.

Word count: 2,6k

Requested? Yes.

Extra notes: Thank you so much for your compliments and the request!! Your suggestion really gave me inspiration to write as soon as I saw it. It's not exactly what you asked for but I hope it's the same vibe and you like it!! Also I’ve seen all the requests for a part 2 of “He's My Collar”, but as stated here, I didn't answer bc I’m working on it! I just didn't have any ideas yet!

General masterlist | A Day in Life - Series masterlist

Whatever hit you today, it sucks. Yesterday, in the afternoon, you had a mild throbbing in your head, but not exactly a headache, at night, fever hit you, alongside a cough. Medicine helped enough but today you still felt a little warm, your head hurt, your nose was somehow stuffed and leaking at the same time. You've been awake for an hour and still just couldn't get yourself to care for your basic needs like showering and eating, let alone go to work, so you called in sick. At least you would have some piece for a day.

Or that's what you thought, until you heard some tapping on your window, scaring the shit out of you, and saw Superman outside with a sympathetic smile and holding a pharmacy bag, a crate of water bottles and food.

Ugh, of course you couldn't actually have some peace.

You took a deep breath to prepare yourself and got up, walking towards you bedroom window, and tried sticking your head outside, hoping he wouldn't enter your home if you kicked him out before, but before you could do anything else, he supersped inside and suddenly was at your side, making you dizzier.

— Hey! I heard what happened. How’re you feeling? — The alien’s face showcased his concern on his furrowed brows and he took a step too close (any step in your direction taken by one of the heroes was already too close for you), extending his arm forward to place the back of his hand in your forehead. You took a step back but he didn't seem to mind.

— Uh, I'm fine. You didn't need to come here. — Superman shook his head.

— I wanted to help. Here, I brought som- — Doorbell. The hero looked in the direction the sound came from, most likely using his X-Ray vision to look through the walls and doors, and squinted his eyes. Oh boy. — You called someone? — His voice is weirdly calm, contrasting with the way he abruptly starts marching out of your room and to the door.

Earlier you thought the fast exertion of movements would be too great for you, but apparently adrenaline was on your side, enough to follow him around as if you were the visitor inside your own place.

— I didn't. — You respond flatly and holding back a groan from annoyance, since you also didn't invite him.

Superman immediately opens the door as soon as it's within his reach and what's on the other side surprises you more than when you got the job at the watchtower.

— Superman. — Batman didn't seem surprised, but he also never showed emotions other than anger. — (Y/N). This is Penny-One. — He is surely referencing the old man well dressed on his side. — He is here to take care of you. — You raise an eyebrow, almost speechless.

— T-Take care of me? — You helplessly watch them invading your residency, painfully aware there's nothing you can do. Superman crossed his arms.

— This is not necessary, I came here to do just that. — Superman’s protest unfortunately doesn't give you any hint of how this will all turn out, nor does it scare Batman and his friend away..

— You have your own responsibilities. — Batman simply states. — You should go.

Penny-One simply turns to you.

— It's a pleasure, Miss/Master/Mx (Y/N), even in your condition. Master Batman talks a lot about you. — You don't know what to stay and it probably shows, since no one waits much for your reaction before Penny-One is moving towards your kitchen and Batman and Superman continue with their argument.

You just go and sit down on your couch, questioning your life decisions and escape plans, which will have to wait until this damned curse leaves your body (and your home).

Your hands raise to rub your face and maybe give you some clearance, maybe wake you up from this nightmare, but keeping your eyes closed and sitting down only remind you of your condition. You feel worse or is it just your spirits? Either way, you let your body slide down until your side rests on the couch cushions, arms hugging your own body to try to have some warmth back. When did it become so cold?

At least their voices were low, as if trying not to bother you, it's a little soothing, especially with the promise of having food. Your eyes hurt just from staying open so you don't. At some point, some type of fabric is thrown over your body and a hand combs through your hair. You are too weak to do anything.

Next time you open your eyes, it's due to disturbing noises, your head is no longer on the arm of the couch and instead is laying on someone’s bare thighs. A pair of hands is running through your locks, and a really nice smell is in the air.

Did you fall asleep?

That would explain why your head is on fucking Wonder Woman's lap and she is looking at you lovingly. Also the fabric from before is Superman's cape.

You quickly shoot up, although just as fast, four or five pairs of hands, coming from seemingly out of nowhere — startling you even more — push you back down, you don't go without struggle, and soon, all hands disappear, green lights catch your attention and you can't move your body a single inch anymore. Somehow, you ended up restrained by a green and bright cocoon, as if you were soon to be a butterfly, only your face is free. Green Lantern’s construct.

— Hey, hey, calm down, hot stuff. I know she’s scary and you would never want to be close to anyone else but me, but you still need rest. — You're turned to the ceiling against your wishes. For some reason the fact that your whole body is covered doesn't give you the comfort nor the protection it should give you, instead, it reminds you of how vulnerable you are.

Your wide and paranoid eyes try to search for anything, since your head is being held in place. You can see Wonder Woman above you, glaring at something outside your line of vision, you are still in her lap. A bit of Aquaman’s blond hair on the bottom of your vision. And Batman, towering over you and the amazon, just observing as always.

— You can release them now, Green Lantern. — It's Superman's voice.

— He is not going to. — You see Batman saying at the same time another voice speaks the same sentence, making all of them turn in the direction of the sound, somewhere you can't see, but you recognize the voice. — He thinks they're weak and incapable of making decisions. — I'm sorry, who is weak and incapable of making decisions here? — He also wants to prove he is the only one capable of protecting and taking care of (Y/N), and impress them so they will fall right into his arms, call him a hero and give him a kiss… And other obscene things. — Batman smirks. Wonder Woman and another new and deep voice loudly laugh, the masculine voice being more obnoxious. Someone scoffs indignantly.

— Okay. Get out of my fucking head or I will make you. — The Lantern's voice sounds angry and you hear hurried footsteps. They wouldn't fight right here, right?! Right beside your sick body and in the middle of your crumpled apartament… It would make such a mess…

— I wasn't inside your head. Your thoughts were too loud, it's like you are screaming in my ear.

— I will make you scream! — You hear Superman superspeeding, probably getting in between the fighting duo.

— Ha- Green Lantern, calm down. No one will make anyone do anything here.

The agonizing feeling of restriction grows.

— WHAT IS HAPPENING HERE? — You scream in a husky voice, panting right after. Everyone is silent and the next second, the construct moves you around until you're sitting up, back to the back of the couch. You are still being held and manhandled, but at least you're not in someone's lap and you can see something other than your ceiling.

Martian Manhunter is standing a few meters away from you, Superman by his side. Wonder Woman was still sitting beside you and doesn't look like getting up any time soon, Green Lantern makes his way to sit down on your other side, placing his arm around you, gladly you can't even feel it. Batman is still standing on the side of the couch, his cape covering his body. Aquaman is sitting in your armchair, his face laid on his hand, watching amused, if not a bit annoyed.

It's so weird seeing all of them, suited up, in the middle of your living room, and in plain daylight.

— We came here to nurse you back to health. — Wonder Woman speaks.

— Uhh, don't you think this is a little too much? — The heroes look at each other as if looking for the issue.

— I mean, yeah. I could do it alone, but for some reason when I got here, these freaks had already broken into your house. — Freak Lantern says, pointing an accusing finger at the other freaks in question, the trinity, Batman, Superman and Wonder Woman. — Those two came in later. — He nodded at Martian Manhunter and Aquaman, not giving them a single look, his eyes solely on you. Like everytime he insists on overly making eye contact with you, it's a bit uncanny. — Worry not, beautiful. I will kick them out for you. — Superman and Wonder Woman snort at his arrogance.

— You could go with them. I'm fine, I don't need help. I’ve been taking care of myself for years and can still do it. — You've been nice long enough, they crossed the line, they invaded your apartment, which is so unprofessional, and you need to set limits. They just look at you with pity.

— I am are aware of my neglect. — Neglect? — But it's going to be different now that we are reunited… — Uh? What is Manhunter talking about?

— Exactly. History has proven how men are unreliable and indifferent to others. I'm the only one you need, darling. — Wonder Woman caresses your face. — I don't even know what they think they are doing here…

— What are you doing here, princess? Don't you have mommy issues to fix or a guy named Steve Trevor to talk to? — The amazon furrowed her eyebrows and glared at the one sitting on your other side.

— Don't listen to him, (Y/N). I left Steve a long time ago, when I met you. — Girl, why? Go back to your man! Leave me alone! — What about Aquaman? Doesn't he have a kingdom to rule? — The man in question dismissed her answer with a hand movement.

— I’m protecting Atlantis’s future by making sure none of you get any ideas and (Y/N) survives their illness. — Batman shook his head.

— I’ve already made sure they're taken care of. You shouldn't be here. There's more important matters for us out there.

— Then why aren't you there?

Their battle of egos is just too fast for your slowed down brain to process and try to formulate any form of strategy. Before their banter gets worse, the older man from before reappears.

— Your soup is ready, Miss/Master/Mx (Y/N). — Penny-One seems unbothered by the commotion around you, walking in with the source of the heavenly smell. Your mouth waters.

— Let me do it, Penny-One. — Wonder Woman gently offers and takes the bowl from him, along with the spoon. The Justice League makes sounds of disgust when they start watching her spoon feeding you (they wanted to be in her place).

You groan, complain, try to wiggle out of the construct but nothing works, especially with your fatigued and sick state. If you weren't claustrophobic before you might be from now on. You are clearly uncomfortable and practically begging to get out but for some reason they just won't listen. It gets to the point where as soon as you finish your soup — after realizing, again, that with those people it's just easier to surrender —, and take your medicine, Green Lantern’s temper apparently gets done with your whining and resistance, and he simply makes another construct. Now you have a pacifier in your mouth. It's your limit.

They start fighting again because some of them find it degrading, some like to hear your voice even if they know how close to cussing them out you are, and some think it's cute and prefer your quietness over your cries.

You can't move. You can't spit it out. You can't bite it off. You can't ask for help.

Green Lantern is rubbing your cheek while — slightly — mocking you. Wonder Woman is cooing at you, while trying to convince the Lantern to stop with his antics. Aquaman is clearly expressing he is on the Lantern’s side. Batman, Superman and Martian Manhunter are threatening him.

Frustration gets the better of you and the dam breaks loose. Now you are wrapped, with a pacifier and crying. Like a baby. In front of your bosses. In front of people who think you are vulnerable and need them. They're practically keeping you hostage. You didn't want them here. You told them no, countless times, and they just blatantly ignored your boundaries.

You have a pa-ci-fi-er. In. Your. Mouth.

And they are talking. They are ignoring you. They're been doing it for hours. No. Months. That's abuse.

This is the most emotion they ever got out of you and it immediately quiets everyone down. They're just staring at you, shocked. This whole thing is just a shitshow. A disaster. They're a curse. You are cursed.

It's so distracting that it makes Green Lantern lose his concentration, which is what fuels his ring’s power, and the constructs start dissipating.

You immediately get up and put as much distance between you and the team, who all have wide eyes and maybe had just now realized the gravity of the situation, while thinking about control damage.

You are searching desperately for how you could effectively kick them out, while also experiencing just the aftereffects of a new trauma, when it looks like it will get even worse. Flash zooms into the apartment.

— Hey, (Y/N)! Sorry I took so long! Busy Day. N-Not that I wouldn't quit anything and everything just to help you. I just now saw the notification that you took a day off today! W-What… W-What are you guys doing here…? — The speedster noticed after his rambles the he is not the only one in the middle of your living room, and points at the whole team, who is on the complete opposite side of you. They also point at him.

— You’re late. — Batman states.

— Slowest man alive. — Green Lantern calls out his friend.

Flash looks around as if gathering his thoughts and notices your distressed state. He turns completely to them, his back to you and him being between you and his team.

— What did you do to them? — At his demand, all of them start pointing at each other and giving some sort of explanation or their side of the story at the same time, turning it into unintelligible sounds, until your yell interrupts them.

— GET. OUT!

— But-

— OUT!

— But, (Y/N)-

— NOW! GET OUT NOW!

They grumble but comply. Penny-One, who was totally unfazed during the while ordeal, just sighs, and starts making his way with them. Until you take a timid step toward him and stop him.

— N-Not you… I-I mean the soup was really good and I don't think I will have the energy to cook later… I-If it's n-not bothering you… — The older man smiles placantinly at you.

— Of course, dear. I'm getting paid either way, might as well just finish my job here.

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@wandalfnation

[regretmedaisy]

i can see you - tom riddle x fmc/reader

part II

loosely inspired by "i can see you" by taylor swift.

“I've been watchin' you for ages

And I spend my time tryin' not to feel it”

summary: She had always fancied Tom Riddle. It was an infatuation that bordered on love and obsession, that she had secretly grown and cared for, content with indulging in her fantasies and never bold enough to try and make them become reality.

When she meets him again in her adulthood, dormant longings resurface together with a newfound desire to be the object of his own devotion.

As their paths keep crossing, she starts to think he feels the same.

tags: afab mc, use of female pronouns and no descriptors (i tagged it as x reader because i guess it could be read as such if you use the same pronouns), somewhat period-accurate clothing, courtship (just a little because it's still tom riddle), fmc has a crush on tom, she's a bit anxious, a bit of fluff, explicit sexual desire, vaginal fingering, cunnilingus, vaginal sex, unprotected sex, woman is on top.

please note that mc has a crush on tom, therefore the way she refers to him could sound a bit cheesy and exaggerated. i edited this last night and didn't read it again before posting. i'm sorry for any typos or grammar mistakes i missed.

bear with her in this one, she's a little anxious.

words: 6.7K

you can find part I here, I strongly recommend you read that one first.

this is me crawling out of my hole of shame to post this chapter.

i'm really sorry for this very late update, but the smut chapter is finally here after many days of writing (but still in time for smutober lol).

it's not crazy smut, but i hope it was worth the wait.

Part II: And I could see you up against the wall with me

She tapped her foot, pursing her red lips as she jotted a few numbers down on a parchment. She sighed, taking another folder from the pile on her side and checking if the reports corresponded. 

When Serena, her boss, had showed up that morning with two delivery men in tow, she already knew her day was going to take a detestable turn.

Serena had dropped three boxes full of last year's reports in the office and sprinted out of the door before they could say anything and try to stop her.

Apparently she had hired a cheap accountant to save money and now she had to review everything before the Ministry noticed and demanded an audit. Or rather, Serena had asked her to do it.

She was now holed up in the backroom while Will had taken her place in the main office, since Serena didn’t pay her enough to care about customers and save her from bankruptcy at the same time.

She glanced at the clock, noting that it was almost time for her usual break. She chewed the inside of her cheek and returned to the reports.

She wasn’t in the right mindset to meet Tom.

The day she had gone to see him had been like the calm before the literal storm. In the past week it had rained so heavily that she had had to give up on going out and he hadn’t come to post his letters. What had happened between them had been left unresolved.

She had replayed it so many times in her mind, at night and during idle moments in the office, picturing different ways in which it could have ended, desperately wishing she could indulge in his warm lips again.

The first few days she had fretted about it, but as the week had gone by without a word from him, she had just started to accept it as the normal course of things. Perhaps it had just been an extraordinary event, a moment that wasn’t going to repeat itself and that she needed to find contentment in. Perhaps it was supposed to be one of those memories she was going to return to in twenty years, thinking about everything she could have had, or it will sour in her mind, turning into regret while her lamenting soul grieved the possibilities of youth, the chances she had been too scared to take.

It didn’t matter that she was conscious of the anxious butterflies leading her decisions, she still didn’t want to find out if what she saw in him was just a product of her infatuated imagination.

She immersed herself in numbers, refusing to go down that rabbit hole again.

Fifteen minutes after the end of her break, a customer walked in. A beat of silence followed and then Will said, “She’s in the back.”

She almost jumped out of her seat, her heart rate picking up. She quickly smoothed her hair and sat straighter, crossing her legs.

Tom appeared in the doorway, his arm half raised as if he had wanted to knock. She pretended she had just noticed him.

“Good morning,” he said.

“Hello, Tom.” She gave him a mellow smile.

He was so good-looking, with his perfectly styled curls and black coat in the muted light of the cloudy morning. Her heart fluttered painfully.

He looked hesitant as he made his way to her and handed her a folded magazine. It was the weekly crossword.

“Thank you,” she said, taking it as her gaze met his. The way he was looking at her was so compelling it was impossible for her to divert her eyes.

He had been thinking of her, she realised, he had noticed her absence, perhaps even missed her.

“I hope I’m not disrupting your work.” His gaze trailed to the numerous papers scattered on the table.

“Not at all, a distraction is more than welcome.” The distraction of his presence was most desirable.

He drew closer, reading through them as he casually rested his hand on the back of her chair.

“What are you doing?” he asked.

“Maths mostly,” she replied, fiddling with the parchments to hide her nervousness.

He reached out over her shoulder to grab a folder but she placed a hand on his arm to stop him.

“I’d rather you didn’t. It’s still work.”

He dropped his arm. “You’re right, I apologise. I don’t wish to put you in an uncomfortable position.”

“It’s fine.”

He stepped to the side, tickling her neck.

“I’ll see you later?” he asked.

She had to stop herself from grinning.

“Of course.” 

She watched him with desirous parted lips as he left. He said goodbye to Will and she heard the door closing. It was only a matter of minutes before Will came to pry.

She grabbed the crossword, flipping through the pages. He had bought her her favourite one.

As she got up to put it next to her bag, a small note fell to the ground. It was a plain piece of parchment. But as she picked it up, ready to throw it on the table with the rest of the documents, words started to appear.

Her breath caught in her throat. She knew to whom that elegant and neat handwriting belonged.

She read the note. Then read it again to make sure she wasn’t hallucinating. 

“I hope to see you more often in the future.

You look stunning with that lip colour.

T.R.”

She brought her fingers to her mouth, staring at the words until each swirl of ink etched into her mind, terrified they might disappear.

Instead his message remained there, visible, tangible, real. He had taken time to write her a note, to think about something he knew she’d appreciate.

Something warm diffused in her chest, a new version of a familiar feeling, and a giggle escaped her as she realised the ridiculous effect he had on her. 

She was so engrossed in her reverie that she didn’t notice Will standing in the door until he cleared his throat. 

She quickly hid the message in her purse and  he was so considerate not to comment on it.

“How is it going?” he asked.

“Awfully slowly, these numbers are all over the place,” she huffed, returning to her chair.

He dragged a chair and sat across from her. He started bouncing his knee. “I know you’d prefer not to talk about this, but how are things between you two?”

She stopped twirling her quill. “What do you mean?”

Will shuffled awkwardly in his seat. “Don’t get me wrong, I’m happy for you but I’d hate to see you hurt.”

She tilted her head to the side, disliking the territory the conversation was heading towards.

He was struggling with his words. “He never- I never saw him interested in a girl. I just want to be sure you know what you can expect from him.”

She averted her eyes. “I have considered all the options.”

“And?”

“And I don’t know, Will!” she bursted out. 

Her flare of annoyance suddenly deflated, making room for embarrassment for what he probably saw as naivety.

“I know I’m probably getting ahead of myself.”

“You are smart, I just can’t stand watching you smile at the things he writes to you.”

She feigned offence and threw a balled up paper at him. 

“When you find someone, you’ll be just as ridiculous.”

He laughed and steepled his fingers in front of him. “I’m curious to know, when did it start?”

She scrunched her eyebrows, thinking about how much she wanted to reveal. “I don’t remember exactly. It was more like a sequence of events, until one day I was anxiously waiting for him to sit at his usual spot at breakfast,” she replied with a smile. Will was smiling too.

“You and half of Hogwarts,” he said.

She chuckled. “I miss those years sometimes. Everything was simpler.”

“I used to worry about everything,” he admitted. “But fears always seem so big.”

They really did.

“What do you like about him?” he asked after a beat of silence.

It was her turn to be at a loss of words. “He’s handsome…and always so mysterious. I think I always liked him because it was easy to imagine him being exactly what I wanted.” She looked at him hesitantly, fearing judgement, but he was just listening. “But I think it’s impossible for me to dislike the real him.”

They shared a small moment of closure. She had always wished for someone she could confide in, someone that could help her see beyond the fabrications of her wary heart, and perhaps she had finally found them.

The bell chimed and Will got up. 

“Do you want to come for lunch on Sunday?” she asked.

“I’d love to. I’m sorry for earlier, I didn’t mean to upset you.”

“Don’t worry about it.”

His gaze shifted between the door and her. “Just make sure you both want the same thing.”

He went back, leaving her at the mercy of her insidious brain and foolish heart.

Throughout the afternoon she had opened the note at least three times, giggling like a schoolgirl everytime she read his words.

Her mind kept straying to what he had said.

“I’ll see you later.”

She wasn’t sure what he had actually meant. Was he just going to stop by or was he going to wait for the office to close? She wasn’t even sure she could see him today, since she expected to stay late to solve Serena’s mess. 

Will popped in. “I have to check something at the owlery. I’ll be back in a while.”

“Alright, I’ll see you later.”

The door opened and closed and then she was submerged by stillness. It was soothing almost.

She had found out long ago that she enjoyed being alone, it freed her of any kind of expectation.

She turned up the heating with her wand and took off her jacket. Since they couldn’t light a fireplace in a room full of paper, they had refined a spell that kept the room warm and the humidity away.

It was a few minutes after the usual closing hour that the door opened again. She knew who it was.

He walked in, his cheeks slightly flushed from the cold and his lips reddened. 

“Are you still working?” he asked.

She nodded. “I’m afraid it’ll take a while before I’m free to go.”

“It’s not a problem,” he said, grabbing her crossword and a quill and sitting down on a chair, bending one leg so that his ankle rested on his other knee.

Her face heated as she watched him but she didn’t say anything.

As she returned to her work, she realised that silence was a strange assistant. It felt like every sound was heightened and she was becoming keenly aware of everything that was happening. The scratching of their quill on parchment, paper being flipped as she checked the numbers or he looked for a crossword he liked, his soft breath threatening to pull her close like a magnet, her absentmindedly chipping her nail polish.

She kept throwing glances in his direction and she could feel his eyes on her from time to time.

An unspoken craving was growing between them again. She had waited long enough.

She slowly got up, gathering her reports and stacking them in a neat pile. She then took them and walked over to the shelves, conveniently passing by Riddle in doing so. 

As she stored them, his chair scraped on the ground and she felt him draw closer. She deliberately turned around, meeting his eyes.

His gaze was deep, like he was trying to read every thought that crossed her mind just by looking at her. She wasn’t going to lay them bare for him. 

He raised his hand, brushing a strand of hair behind her ear. “Did you get my message?”

“I did,” she replied, stepping forward and trailing her fingers down his suit jacket, feeling the fabric. “You keep mentioning it but this is the first time I’ve seen you all week.”

“It was storming all week,” he pointed out.

She tilted her head, finding his eyes again. His eagerness was palpable. “Still,” she said.

He grabbed her waist, pressing her body flush against his. “And you still haven’t answered my question.”

She had thought about that moment since then.

“Tell me what you desire the most.”

What could she tell him? That she had been pining for him for so long she couldn’t imagine herself with anyone else? That she was jealous of even thinking about him with someone else? Will’s words played in her mind.

She leaned closer, murmuring against his ear. “Not until I know why you’re here, Tom.”

She left a kiss on his jaw, phantom lips brushing against his flawless skin.

“It’s a really uncomplicated answer,” he said, caressing her back.

“Explain it to me, then.”

Tender amusement tugged at the corners of his lips. “Do you really think I came here because I don’t own an owl?”

His words pulled at her heartstrings with raw delight and her mind went blank. Adrenaline was rushing through her as she listened to her impulses. It was enough, at least for now it was enough.

She wrapped her arms around his neck and tangled her hand in his hair, involuntarily tugging at the strands as she leaned closer. She could feel his warm breath as he pulled her in, gripping the silky fabric of her blouse.

She met his lips halfway, the burning touch consuming her as he pressed her against the shelves, one hand lost in her hair, the other splayed around her ribcage. 

She bit his lower lip, smiling as it elicited a groan from him and the kiss became more demanding.

It was a moment frozen in time, where she wanted to stay forever, like the scenery in a snowglobe.

“Hello?”

A man’s voice abruptly pulled them apart. She was breathless as she realised she had forgotten to lock the door. Was this a conspiracy? 

Tom was slightly panting and she left a small kiss on his neck.

“Don’t leave,” she whispered.

She used a finger to fix her smudged lipstick and went to see who had just dared to interrupt them.

There was a man standing in the office.

“We’re closed,” she said.

“But I saw the light on.”

There was a twitch in her jaw. “We are closed to the public. I must ask you to come tomorrow morning.”

He rolled his eyes and she ignored his grumbling as he left, locking the door behind him. When she went back, Tom was leaning against the table.

He turned his head towards her as she languidly got closer. She forgot pleasantries, immediately grabbing his face to kiss him again. He was quick to react, wrapping his arms around her.

His mouth trailed down, kissing her cheek, her jaw and then pressing against her neck, soft lips and the occasional scrape of his teeth. 

He grabbed her waist and spun her around, flattening her back against his chest and brushing her hair away from her neck to bite and lick her skin. His hands travelled down and he started gathering the fabric of her skirt. 

Merlin, it was finally happening. 

He caressed her inner thigh, tracing patterns and snapping the nylon of her stockings as his fingers moved excruciatingly slow.

Finally he pulled her underwear to the side, feeling the wetness between her folds with his fingers as his other hand cupped her breast.

She threw her head back against his shoulder as he stroked her clit, eliciting a sigh out of her, and she grabbed his thigh for support.

“I won’t drop you,” he murmured, amused, against her ear. He rubbed his palm over her clothed breast, the friction causing sparks to jolt through her body.

None of her fantasies came even close to what she was feeling right now.

“Should I trust you?” she asked, biting her lip to suppress a moan as he sunk one finger inside of her, his thumb still applying pressure on her clit.

“Such a great timing to ask me that,” he replied. She felt him smile on her skin.

“We don’t really know each other, Tom.” She dug her fingers into his flesh as he slipped in a second finger and started fingering her, stretching her as pleasure morphed her features. 

“And yet you are letting me do this.” He squeezed her breast, lewd wet sounds filling the room as he kept moving his fingers inside of her. 

She leaned her body weight completely on him, her legs unsteady as it was precarious the beating of her heart. 

He let out a low moan as she yanked his hair to catch his mouth, biting his lip hard to gain better access, their tongues tangling together.

He curled his fingers inside of her, an unrelenting wave of pleasure washing over her.

She stopped to imagine what it would be like if he dropped to his knees again, if he started kissing and licking her, if she could watch him at her mercy between her legs.

She realised in that moment that the fall down the precipice was inevitable. Tom had threatened to push her but she had allowed him to succeed, jumping into an abyss that felt unending but that could only allow two conclusions to her story.

What she had told Will was true. She loved the fantasy, all the glances, conversations, gestures that had never happened, that she had delighted herself with when the reality was harsher, but as she kissed him she knew that falling for the real Tom was unavoidable. Not if he kept touching her like that.

It was bound to happen, it was part of her story, the decision she was brave enough to take.

She focused on him, on the circles his thumb was drawing on her clit, on the indecent sounds falling from her lips, on his groans on her reddened skin, on him growing harder against her back. 

He pulled her hair back, tilting her head to meet her gaze. His eyes glimmered with rapture while hers were heavy-lidded, tension building inside of her. 

He didn’t take his eyes off of her, as if he wanted to memorise each detail of her, the way she looked at him, the way her lips parted slightly and the way she panted as she was nearing her orgasm.

“Just like that, darling,” he murmured, a pleased smile on his lips as he noticed she was still blushing.

She threw her head back, losing herself in the motion of his fingers, surrendering herself as blissed moans spilled out shamelessly. She squeezed his soaked fingers, and he kept moving, stroking her throughout her climax.

She panted, coming down from her apex in a flurry of emotions and flustered thoughts. He raised his wet fingers to her lips and she opened her mouth, tasting herself on her tongue as she sucked on them, never breaking eye contact.

“Good girl,” he said, holding her jaw and kissing her.

It was a slow kiss, meant to explore her depths in a different way from the breathless and unrestrained passion from before. She leaned into his palm, her hand closing around his wrist.

His arms snaked around her waist and he turned them around, pushing under her thighs to lift her on the table.

The kiss transformed again.

Teeth and tongues met with vehemence, burning urgency guiding their movements as he brought her legs around his waist and she quickly started to unbutton her blouse.

But at the third button, she stopped. 

Tom noticed the shift in her demeanour and drew back, observing her. Her eyes flew to the clock, as she had just remembered about Will.

She noticed with disappointment that they had no time.

“What is it?” he asked. She didn’t miss the urgent tone of his question.

“Will will be back any time now,” she replied, leaving a peck on his lips. 

He cleared his throat and stepped back, composing himself. She got off the table and

cool hands unexpectedly reached her again, adjusting her clothes and stockings. She shivered at the contact.

He smoothed her skirt and put his coat back on, watching her as she scribbled something on a piece of paper and gave it to him.

“If you want to stop by one of these days.”

“I remember where you live,” he replied, reading the address she had written down.

She shrugged, holding out one finger to wipe away the lipstick at the corner of his mouth.

“Do you have to go back to work?”

“I was supposed to meet with a potential supplier, so yes.”

“I’d stop by the bathroom before,” she advised, gesturing for him to go as she herself needed to compose herself again.

She braced herself against the threshold, leaning her head on the hard wood as she watched him unlock the door and leave. 

Then she was alone, finally finding an answer in the cluster of hypotheses that had tormented her mind.

Two days later, as she was returning from her meeting with Serena, she found Tom waiting for her.

He was talking to Will and they both turned to her as she entered, feeling tremendously self-conscious.

“How is Serena?” Will asked.

“Dim-witted as always,” she replied, earning a laugh from Will.

Her eyes trailed to Riddle, holding an unspoken question. 

Will seemed to notice because he stepped forwards.

“It’s quite late, you can go if you want, I’ll close.”

Tom didn’t wait for him to repeat himself, pushing down the handle and holding the door open for her.

She mouthed a ‘thank you’ to him and followed Tom outside. Once in the street, she huddled herself in her coat and took the arm he was offering her. 

“May I walk you home?” he asked.

“Of course,” she said, a little breathy, still not immune to the chivalrous manners he always had with her.

They strolled through the streets, passing by scarcer and scarcer people as the stores emptied and everyone returned home seeking a tranquil evening.

She held his arm tightly, her fingers tracing delicate patterns on the fabric of his coat.

The first time they had walked together it had felt like an accident, a singular mistake in the already waved threads of her life. This time, she yearned for so much more than she wanted for the error to repeat itself; she was willing to cut the strings herself and tie them back together, as messy as it might have looked. 

They crossed the road and he gently put a hand on her waist, pushing her away from the pavement. 

“Would you fancy dinner?” he asked. There was a foreign quality in his voice and when she turned to look at him, he averted his eyes. She blinked bewildered. Was he nervous?

“I’d love to,” she replied and she noticed his chest rising like he had just begun breathing again. “But not tonight.”

An almost imperceptible smile cleared his expression at her answer and she leaned her head on his shoulder, basking in his mere presence.

When they reached her front door, she looked for her keys with embarrassingly clammy hands. 

As she lifted her head to ask Tom if he wanted to stay, she found his eyes impatiently boring into her bag. 

“Would you-”

His gaze snapped to her, serious and scorching. “Don’t even ask.”

Something coiled between her legs at the way he was looking at her. She nodded and walked up the few stairs to her door, unlocking it.

“Second floor,” she said, more to fill the silence than anything else.

They stepped into the building, the sound of her heels and the soles of his shoes hitting the stone ricocheting through the empty hall.

She turned to gesture to him to follow her when he grabbed her face, kissing her as he pushed her against the wall by the foot of the stairs. Her hands tangled in his hair, tugging at it just as she suspected he loved by the way he always pressed himself harder against her. 

He curved his palm around her cheek, better angling her face as their tongues met.

“I have a nosy neighbour,” she said after they pulled apart to catch their breath. “She is probably spying on us through her peephole.”

Tom didn’t think twice about it, taking her hand and leading her up to the second floor. She stifled a laugh as she unlocked the door, Tom’s lips skimming against her neck as she did, and was left breathless when he closed it unceremoniously behind them, resuming from where they had been interrupted.

As she dropped her bag and grabbed his waist, walking backwards into her living room, she remembered there were clothes somewhere - perhaps in the bathroom but she wasn’t sure - that she had forgotten to put away yesterday.

In any case, Tom didn’t look particularly interested in how tidy she was.

They quickly took off each other's coats and discarded them on the floor.

He sat on her sofa, pulling her down with him.

She was straddling him, her knees digging into the plush cushions as his hands appreciatively caressed her back, moving up and down and occasionally squeezing. She lit the fireplace with a wave of her hand.

She rocked her hips, rubbing against him and eliciting a long awaited moan from him. She grabbed the collar of his shirt, their lips collading so hard she was sure she cut him.

She helped him out of his jacket and vest and undid his tie, smoothing her hands on his white button-down.

“I’ve waited too long,” she said, quickly unbuttoning his shirt and grinding against him. Her hands disappeared under his undershirt and ran over his pale chest, lightly scratching his skin.

“Slowly, my dear. We will get there,” he replied between kisses.

His palms kept tracing her thighs and his face buried in her neck, nibbling at the thin skin.

When she was a small girl, before she discovered sex, Tom Riddle was just a boy she liked. During puberty, sharing stories and questions with her friends, she started to understand what was the sensation that passed through her everytime she was close to him, the one that made her cheeks redden and her mind go somewhere she wasn’t yet comfortable with.

As an adult, sexual relations weren’t unfamiliar to her, but this carnal longing, the need of a physicality that went beyond her skin touching his, was.

He opened her blouse, revealing her silk slip and bra underneath.

She wanted to touch his soul, to hold it and comprehend it.

Her eyes fell on the tattoo on his forearm, black tendrils of ink in the shape of a serpent slithering out of a skull.

“Does this have a meaning?” she asked.

He followed her gaze, blinking surprised at her question. “It does.”

“Am I prying too much if I say I’m curious to learn it?”

He bit his lip, opening and closing his fist as if he was scrambling for words. Or perhaps he was just determining if he could trust her.

“It’s a reinterpretation of the ouroboros, the snake eating its own tail,” he finally said. “It symbolises eternity and the renewal of the being after rebirth.”

She traced her fingers on his skin, following the outline of the snake. “And what does your interpretation mean?”

“There is time to talk about it later,” he whispered, his teeth biting her neck and sinking lower, kissing her collarbone and her sternum, moving the fabric covering her breasts to the side.

She let go of the subject. She knew what it meant not being comfortable sharing your life.

He held one breast between his fingers, latching his mouth over the other, sucking her nipple and twirling his tongue around it.

She moaned, rolling her hips faster as he revered her bosom, the cold air hitting her moist skin and making her shiver as he took her other nipple in his mouth, lightly tugging at it until she reached the point where pleasure and discomfort mixed.

“Since we are in the mood for confessions…” she said between moans. He raised his head and looked at her waiting for her to continue. She hesitated, collecting all her courage.

“Why did you pursue me?”

His eyes softened, glimmering with fondness. He brushed a strand of hair away from her face.

“Because there is something extremely valuable in your devotion.” His voice was an intimate murmur, a confession no one else could hear.

She freezed, turning her head to the side to hide her mortification.

He took her chin, searching for her eyes until she finally gave in.

“Don’t be embarrassed, darling, I respect it, I understand it. Obsession keeps us alive, it’s what drives us.”

She swallowed the lump of embarrassment in her throat. “Do you enjoy it?”

“Being the object of the desire of such a woman? Of a witch? I do,” he replied, and he was so direct and earnest that her heart swelled.

He lifted her to sit on the sofa, sliding down on his knees on the floor and taking off his shirt and vest. She remained silent as he rolled down her tights, his lips gliding down her smooth skin. He unbuttoned her skirt and helped her out of it, tracing patterns on her inner thigh as his other hand felt her damp underwear.

She tensed, something tightening in her lower abdomen and her eyes fell down to his trousers.

He kissed the crease of the thigh, like he had done that one time at Borgin and Burkes, but this time she wasn’t letting anyone interrupt them. 

He took off her underwear, his movements deliberately slow, and kissed her everywhere, except there.

His lips felt hot on her skin, searing her flesh like she had often dreamed about, carving his way into her body the same way he had done with her mind and heart, until her entire soul was consumed by him, until he could finally close that fist and feel her in a way nobody had before. 

Her breath hitched as he delicately kissed her mound, spreading her legs apart. She leaned her head against the backrest, licking her lips with anticipation, and she couldn’t contain a whimper as he felt his tongue dragging down her slit, sweet and cruel.

He took her clit in his mouth, sucking on it as his hand splayed on her abdomen to keep her still.

She squeezed her eyes shut, overwhelmed.

“Look at me, darling,” he murmured against her folds. His breath was warm and pleasant.

She obliged, meeting his devilish grinning figure between her legs. She was incapable of looking away as he resumed his work, she didn’t want to look away. She wanted to watch him, finally allowing herself to fully indulge in him, in what he wished to do for her.

She observed his curved eyelashes, the way his perceptive eyes followed her reactions, refining his movements to please her better.

He sucked her labia and she moaned loudly, the idea of him enjoying this as much as her being exhilarating.

He threw her leg on his shoulder, resulting in her figure sliding down the cushions and him gaining better access to her. 

His tongue probed her entrance as he coated his fingers in her wetness. He slipped one finger in, working her thoroughly as she gripped his hair, keeping his head in place.

He inserted a second finger, his tongue on her clit moving accordingly to the delighted sounds she emitted.

“Tom,” she cried urgently as she tried to press herself harder against him.

He curled his fingers inside of her and her hips jolted upwards, arching her back to an uncomfortable angle as she reached her orgasm with lascivious bliss, her obscene moans matching the wet sounds he produced by licking her until she came down from her climax.

“Tom,” she said again, so breathless her voice was a raspy whisper.

“I know,” he said, kissing her leg and inhaling deeply, like he was trying to commit the moment to memory.

He brought his fingers to his mouth, licking them clean as she let her watch.

She gently pushed him onto the carpet, bracing her hands on his shoulder as she sat on top of him. The fire was burning, enveloping their almost naked figures in warm orange light, heating their already scalding skin.

She took off her blouse with quivery hands, his gaze tracing her naked form that was slowly revealing itself. She hooked her fingers into the straps of her slip, pulling it down and then getting rid of it altogether. His hands on her waist tensed as she did the same for her bra.

Her lips parted as he touched her breast with both hands, kneading the soft flesh, tracing her areolae. 

She undid his trousers, pulling down the fabric until they were both completely naked. She took him in her hand, her fingers closing tentatively around him. Her hand started sliding up and down, her pace getting quicker and more confident as moans escaped him. She brushed her thumb on his tip, her eyes admiring what was in front of her. His lips were swollen, residue of her lipstick still on them, his hair was tousled, curls falling disorderly on his forehead, his eyes heavy-lidded as he looked at her. She felt a rush of satisfaction in knowing his current state was her doing, that she had enough power over him to ruin his flawless exterior, to make him want her to do it. 

His lips caught hers and he gently pushed her hand away. 

What happened after felt like rehearsed choreography, something so familiar it was impossible to forget. Their bodies moved together, their movements responsive to each other, doing and touching exactly where it mattered.

She pushed herself up on her knees, slowly lowering herself until she sank down on him completely, shuddering breaths escaping her lips.

His jaw was tense as she placed a hand on his shoulder for support, positioning herself better.

She didn’t break eye contact as she rolled her hips, soaking in the hazy blue of his eyes, in every twitch of his jaw and emotion he was feeling as she increased her pace, in his voice murmuring her name against her ear as his hands squeezed her tights and traced her back.

Skin slapped against skin, his touch inebriating as he felt every part of her, caressing her, massaging her, kissing her until she couldn’t take it anymore. Almost.

His hand dipped between her legs again, stroking her clit as she rocked her hips, eliciting groans from both of them.

Sentiment and pleasure fused together in an exhilarating moment, seared in her mind and flesh forever.

She kissed him again - she could never get tired of that - and bit his lower lip roughly as his other hand went to her breast again, pulling at her nipple. 

She threw her head back, letting his mouth scrape over her neck and chest, leaving behind scorching wet kisses. Or perhaps those were marks reddening her skin, she didn’t particularly care.

He gripped her waist, thrusting upwards as she held onto him tighter. Her nails drew half-moons into his back and she bit his neck, the fibres of the carpet scratching her knees.

The lights in the flat fluttered momentarily.

His fingers increased the pressure on her clit as his thrusts grew in intensity with one purpose in mind. 

She bit her lip, trying to hold back, to prolong this instant of pure bliss before she inevitably plummeted onto the other side.

She arched her back, moving accordingly to his rhythm, her hips bucking erratic as she rubbed against his pelvis. 

And then she fell down, unrestrained, her walls closing around him as she moaned uncontrollably. He didn’t stop, drawing circles on her sensitive skin until her breath found a semblance of steadiness again. 

“You did so good,” he whispered against her forehead, brushing a strand of sweaty hair away.

She slumped against him, her hands grabbing onto his biceps as he chased his own pleasure, his movements turning frantic, losing his rhythm.

She found herself murmuring against his skin the same things she had never had the courage to say out loud, not even to herself. She wasn’t sure he was even listening to her, engrossed as he was, but it didn’t matter.

He squeezed her tights once and she understood, rolling to the side as he deftly touched himself, fast strokes that culminated in white spurts all over his hand. She watched him mesmerised

He turned to look at her, his chest rising and falling rapidly. The fire casted shadows on his gorgeous face. 

They stayed like that for a long moment, gazing into each other, trying to guess what the other was thinking, making sense of what remained of themselves after what had just happened.

Did it have the same momentous effect on both of them? Or was it just her that knew she couldn’t go back to being acquaintances after this?

“Do you want to stay here tonight?” she asked. Her voice sounded faint and husky to her own ears.

“I do,” he replied without a second of hesitation.

They didn’t get up, instead resting against the foot of her sofa. She curled up against him as his hand traced indistinct patterns on her skin, remaining in this haze of indiscernible unspoken feelings they were both still trying to find a name for. 

When she woke up the next morning he was gone. As she took in the cold sheets and missing clothes, her heart threatened to crack.

She got up groggily, conclusions already forming in her mind, building the most pessimistic of pictures.

She felt anxious as she wore her robe and opened the door, heading straight for the bathroom. Halfway down the corridor, the sound of someone flipping through a newspaper halted her in her steps.

She stepped into the kitchen, finding Tom sitting in a chair with his legs crossed.

“Good morning,” he said.

“Good morning,” she said back, adjusting the belt of her robe. 

She noticed he had made breakfast, a steaming coffee pot, kept warm by magic, and some pastries she had never bought waiting for her on the table. 

She turned to take a mug from a cabinet so that she could hide her smitten smile. When she closed the cabinet, she found him looking at her.

There was no need for words.

“Where did you get that?” she asked as she poured herself some coffee, referring to the newspaper. 

“I stole it from your neighbour, I hope she won’t mind.”

She laughed. “So you know how to make a joke.”

“What is that supposed to mean?”

She sat next to him, crossing her legs. She perhaps needed to rethink her choice of slippers.

“You were always so serious growing up.”

She put a spoonful of sugar in her coffee. 

“That never seemed to deter you.”

“It doesn’t.”

He took a sip of his own coffee. “Good.”

“Does it deter you, knowing how I feel?”

He blinked. “It never had. It makes it more interesting if I have to be honest.”

She blushed, scared to ask the next question.

“How long have you known?”

He got up, brushing his knuckles on her cheek.

“Long enough to see you for who you truly are.” 

He bent to give her a chaste kiss. “I should go, the shop opens in half an hour.”

He put on his coat and grabbed his leather gloves from his pocket. She turned in her chair, treasuring the last few moments of him in her apartment.

“There’s still a lot you haven’t learned yet.” 

She refused to be an open book to him. There was so much about her that was still incomprehensible even to her and too much she wanted to show him on her own terms. She wanted to be enigmatic, to drive him mad.

“I know.”

Her disappointment was visible on her face as she was met with his silence. She had wanted to continue that conversation, to learn what he had observed.

Instead he opened her front door, throwing her one last glance, heavy with unsaid intention she hoped she wasn’t imagining, before leaving. 

She had almost finished her breakfast when she noticed a small note under the newspaper he had left behind. She grabbed it faster than she was willing to admit, almost knocking over her cup in the process, and unfolded it.

“Dinner tonight?

I’ll pick you up at eight.

T.R.”

the last part is a bonus scene i wanted to write to apologize for my tardiness. tom is a little different, but I hope he isn't too out of character.

i honestly had so much fun writing this short story and exploring a different tom from the one i usually read and write about. i hope you enjoyed this and thank you for reading!

[roo-roo-roo]

May I have a platonic letter response from Idia Shroud for 'Letters to My Prefect'? Public response is fine. Just take your time you need.

What's up Idia (XxShroudxX)? Thanks for being my virtual brother-in-arms, you've gotten me through so many difficulties (irl or otherwise).

I can't believe it's been two years since I first met you in that waiting lobby and even more so cannot believe you were actually from another world! (Or that I got isekai'd here.. I really thought you were just roleplaying)

It's been nice getting to know who player two really is from behind the controller. Know that no matter who I meet and form a connection with in this world you'll always be my first link and guiding star.

Anyways I've been rewatching Neon Genesis Envangelion and-

rambling ensues

Hi there, Prefect! Thanks for sending a request to me, and I hope you like what I made for you!

Note: English is not my first language so I'm sorry for grammatical and punctuation errors.

Letters to my Prefect || Idia Shroud

Text Version:

Hey, Voidless. You know you could’ve just called me so we could play that new RPG you got? And what’s with the sappiness? You know that’s what normies do, right? Bahhh… who am I kidding… You’re the only one I can stand when it comes to these types of things. In fact, you mean a lot to me as much as Ortho does. So I’ll humor you and send you a letter… or an e-mail. Whatever you wanna call it. Ugh… the more I continue to type, the more I feel icky with this softie thing. I should’ve been used to this by now… but that’s beside the point! I guess you can say that I can’t believe this too. Before you came along, the only online buddy I had was Muscle Red. Not to mention, when I started to recognize you after you got isekai’d in Twisted Wonderland, I actually got scared. And no, I wasn’t worried for your safety haha. (Tho, I’m happy ur like… uh… c-comfy here with us.) The thought of meeting someone IRL—especially someone you know online—is just strange to me y’know? We both know that I’m not the best with social interactions. Most of the time I look like a total doof, but I’m glad you came along. The fact that you made things easier for me makes me think that reality is actually pretty fun (please don't tell the others I'm saying these things. I won't pay for the next limited edition skin if you do-). Hardmode levels are not always exciting but these changes like you, are. Anyway, I’m happy that we get to gain more EXP together as time goes on. You and Ortho are my Sun and Moon after all. Both of you make me want to get out a little more and see the sky for myself. I’m not gonna make it easy for you though LOL. You gotta give me a boon in exchange for my IRL presence outside. Come over. I’m not letting you rewatch Evangelion without me. P.S. Are we not over the debate of who’s Player #1 between the two of us??? I thought it was me… I did win our last match, yeah? Hmph. Whatever, I’ll let this go, for now. But don’t think that I’ll give you a pass next time, normie. From your “guiding star”,

Idia Shroud

╰─▸ ❝ cafekitsune owns all of the banners except the gif banners, which were created by me. Please check them out!

╰─▸ ❝ @voidlesslove Hope you enjoyed reading!

[psychopathseraphim]

sammy lawrence x selfharmer!reader

tw: extreme anger from sammy's end, self-inflicted harm, forceful revealing of scars

as sammy lawrence's assistant director, you really only have one job (because sammy tends to do everything on his own); to check on how the music plays alongside the film. during your first few days as an intern, you had some issues with syncing the music, but now that it's been a few months or so, this task has come naturally to you.

one day, however, tension within the studio was high, mainly because a short was destined to come out tomorrow (anytime tomorrow) and the music department was rushing to create songs for it. not to have a complex but you were extremely certain that it was only you and sammy that deserved a place in the credits, with how the other interns (including jack fain) failed to cooperate and contribute.

sammy was extremely on-edge that same evening, especially due to the sleep-deprivation catching up to him. desperately he wrote scores and edited notes to be performed and recorded by you both; you were somewhat afraid due to your knowledge about certain instruments being short and cut-off. you didn't want to press the man, especially not tonight.

however, after submitting a scene you synchronized the music to, sammy found out about a certain error- a song for an extremely crucial part was mixed up with another song. . . this angered sammy extremely, especially because he didn't necessarily have extra time on his hands to tweak it. feeling like his trust in you was misplaced, he called you over.

"(y/n), look at this. haven't we talked multiple times about this song being for this scene?!" his voice started to get louder as his anger continued to rise. "you have ONE thing to do, (y/n)! you're in the luckier end of the rope- try being in my shoes! if I were you, I wouldn't make a single mistake!"

somewhat scared, you grab onto the hem of your shirt and look down. nervously, you try to reason with him: "I-I'm sorry, there must have been an error in the syst-"

"I DON'T CARE ABOUT ANY ERRORS IN THE SYSTEM! who else is behind the system if not you?! God, you interns are useless." he spat back, his voice booming and echoing throughout the whole studio, probably letting other late-staying employees know that you were being yelled at. before you knew it, your eyes were glassy and filled with tears, and crying in front of your boss would be embarrassing. turning around and gathering the work you made a mistake on, you excuse yourself to the bathroom.

self-harm was something you found comfort in, sad to say. you always kept a blade inside a mini-notepad you'd stuff inside your pocket; it yearned to be used when sammy was screaming at you. sitting inside of a bathroom stall, you sink to the ground, roll down your sleeves, and prepare your arms.

your arms were already littered with scars; old, new. . . it didn't matter because no one noticed. you weren't a little kid anymore, having your parents check your wrists to see if you were still doing the "bad thing". you were an adult and did whatever you want. . . so here you were, doing just that.

you idolized sammy, and being the cause of his frustration-

one cut.

how could you? as his assistant, you're supposed to help him-

two cuts.

not anger him. not make his stress worse-

three cuts.

by then, your wrists were dripping with blood that you made sure couldn't touch your sleeves. you wash your wrists, your blade, and exit the bathroom almost like nothing ever happened.

you were stressed, too, and you didn't need sammy to know about how you got rid of it. he'd find you weird and tell joey and the others about you. you could lose your job and get send to a hospital or a clinic. sammy could laugh at you; all up in your face, and send you off to find a better intern.

you didn't want to think of sammy like that, but you knew he acted exactly like that.

as you entered the music department office, you noticed that sammy didn't even lift his head to check on who entered. he's probably extremely annoyed of me, you come to think as you take your seat. for the next few moments, work goes on an usual, before sammy lifts his head to look at something in a shelf above you.

"(y/n)," he said, stern, but definitely calmer than the last time he spoke to you, "see that book up there? music theory is its name. get it for me now."

with no answer on your behalf, you stand up and reach for it. although you do grab it, your sleeve rides up and for a second, your raw, red-tinted scars are revealed to your boss, who has been staring at you this entire time.

trying to brush it off while praying to God he didn't see your scars, you hand him the book with your sleeve being held tightly by your fingers. some blood presses on your sleeve for a bit.

"here, sir," you said.

"... (y/n)- what was that?" he asked, his tone agitated once more which gave you a sense of fear once more.

"what was what, sir-"

"no, don't try to play it off like that, I'm being serious-" he grabs your wrists and forcefully pulls your sleeve back. with a gasp, you cover your scars on your wrist with your other hand. sammy, however, easily pulls it off to reveal scars and new cuts.

"(y/n)." he says angrily, "what the fuck is this?"

"I..." you're brought to tears once again with his tone of voice and the sense of fear you feel within you. please don't yell at me, or tell on me. I'm not weird, I promise, you think as if he could hear you. "I just... they're old..."

he inspects your new cuts and shakes his head with furrowed brows. "these are not old, (y/n). stop lying. tell me now- why would you do this?"

"the pressure, sir." you managed to say, praying to God sammy won't ridicule you or compare your stresses to his. "I didn't want to be the main cause of your frustrations. it's not as bad as it seems, I don't do that religiously... it's just a way to get rid of stress."

it's quiet for a bit, before sammy sighs, gets up off his chair, and walks off. he comes back shortly after holding a first aid kit, sits down, and grasps your wrist...gently, this time. he opens the first aid kit, grabs for a cotton ball coated with betadine, and places it on your cuts.

you wince first, expecting it to sting (as usual, whenever you'd cut yourself). sammy lets out a chuckle at this- "it's betadine, (y/n). it's not supposed to sting."

"oh. right." is all you utter out.

it's silence once more, and sammy breaks this once more- "(y/n), I'm sorry I yelled at you earlier- I really hope these cuts aren't as bad as you make it, though. I was irritated, that's all. I'm sorry." he continues on, "you're not useless- you're far from that. you're a good intern, and a better assistant."

these words make your heart flutter. perhaps there was more to idolizing sammy lawrence than you knew- than it was platonic. perhaps there was a bit of romance in it; something you'd never admit to him- ever.

the night ends with this, and you return home with treated cuts and a much better feeling within you.

the next day is the premiere of the newest bendy episode- that stupid dancing demon, the cause of all your stress. all of the staff members watch intensely; sammy watches for any musical errors, joey watches for any animation errors- that kind of thing.

fortunately, the episode ends without any errors spoken by the heads, and all of the staff members rejoice. two interns in the far back high-five, and joey returns to his office with a more relieved and happy expression on his face.

once everyone leaves for food and wine, sammy approaches you.

"(y/n), good job." he says with a rare smile on his mouth. "I knew you could do it. how are your cuts?"

"they're fine, sir." you respond. they were fine- alongside that, so were you.

[girlwiththepapatattoo]

The Unlikely Similarity Between Kittens and Vampires, Chapter 6

Warnings: Astarion being himself

Summary: Feelings are hard. Some people deal with it...poorly.

Notes: I won't lie, this is barely edited, so if you see anything that needs to be changed, please let me know! But I'm pretty happy with it anyway. Enjoy! <3

Read on Ao3 here!

Chapters: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5

The following morning dawns bright, small shafts of sunlight beaming down through the cracks in the floorboards above. One particularly spiteful ray spears Astarion right in the eye, and he grumbles ever so faintly as he shifts and wakes. 

Almost before he’s fully out of his trance, he realizes that his arms are full of something warm and soft that smells…well, without the benefits of a full bath not particularly lovely, but not completely repulsive either. His crimson eyes flutter open, and he looks down to find Sable snuggled up against his chest, his arms tight around her. 

He freezes, staring down at her in wonder. She’s…here. She’s willingly caught up in his embrace, her fingers curled into the fabric of his shirt. Her breathing is slow and even, her hair mussed, and she looks so soft and peaceful that he can’t even begrudge her the small puddle of drool she’d left on his shoulder. 

He finds his lips tugging in a soft smile as he gazes down at her fondly, and he can’t help himself from leaning forward and brushing a kiss over her forehead. 

The crashing open of the door to the forge has him up in an instant, crouching over her protectively, dagger in hand and teeth bared. “Up and at ‘em!” Karlach crows with entirely too much cheer for so early in the morning. “Oh! Mornin’, Fangs. Sorry if I scared ya!” 

He growls, straightening and shoving the dagger back into its sheath. “You know, there’s this handy little trick called knocking. Maybe give it a try sometime,” he snaps as he hears Sable stir behind him. 

“What’s goin’ on?” she mumbles, rubbing the sleep from her eyes. 

“Nothing, kitten,” he replies as Karlach turns to go. “Just our resident barbarian living up to her profession.” 

“Love ya too, Fangs!” he hears her call with a cackle, and he pinches the bridge of his nose. 

A gentle hand on the back of his arm pulls him out of his ire, and he looks down to find Sable smiling up at him. He can’t help but soften, but he hides it, clearing his throat. “Well. Good morning, kitten. I do hope you slept well.” 

“I did, thanks,” she murmurs, and she keeps looking up at him with that same smile on her face. “How do you feel?” 

He smirks faintly, doing his utmost to keep what he’s really feeling (why is she smiling like that? Why does it make me feel--are those seriously butterflies?! For fuck’s sake, I’m over two hundred years old–), and reach out, brushing a gentle touch over the bite mark on her neck. “I feel…incredible,” he purrs. “You are delicious, you know?” 

She blushes faintly, as he knew she would. “Ah, well, thanks. But not what I meant. Could I look at your shoulder?” 

He blinks. “My…shoulder?” 

“Yes. I want to check on the sting you took yesterday, make sure it’s still healing well.” 

He stares at her. A tiny part of him, the manipulative survivor in him, rages at how often she puts him off guard. But finally, he sighs and nods, sitting on the edge of the forge. “Very well. Just to put your mind at ease, of course. I feel…well, better than fine, really.” 

She steps up to him, parting the as-of-yet unmended cut in his shirt, and peers at the wound she’d healed. Nothing but pure, unblemished skin. “You were right. But thank you for letting me look.” 

She goes to step away, to start putting on her armor and packing up to leave. But his hand catches her wrist, and she looks up at him in surprise. He looks uncharacteristically serious. “This was a gift, you know,” he murmurs, his eyes brushing the twin marks on her throat before meeting her own again. “I won’t forget it.” Then he’s moving past her, beginning to get into his armor. 

And as she starts getting into her own gear, she feels her wrist tingling, her skin hanging onto the feel of his touch. 

She can’t find it in her to mind. 

/////////////////////////////////////////////

The goblin leaders are dead, and they’ve rescued the druid. The huge elf Halsin and Sable get along like a house on fire. 

Which Astarion is thrilled about. 

Really. 

As he sits by his tent, attempting to read, he listens to their newest druid telling Sable…something or other, he wasn’t paying attention. What does make him pay attention is the laugh it draws out of her: an uninhibited, unselfconscious, snorting laugh that he wishes he didn’t find so gods-damned adorable. 

He grinds his teeth as he reads the same paragraph for the fifth time. He’s not upset with her, the thought never entered his mind. He’s glad she’s making friends-poor girl’s so socially anxious she can barely talk to anyone without tripping over her tongue. 

 And honestly, the thought of her and the other man even being intimate doesn’t make him that upset. She could use a good romp to get rid of some of that tension. 

…but the problem is that he wants to have her first. 

No, he’s certainly not upset with her. He’s upset with himself. He hasn’t felt jealousy like this in literal centuries. And it would be one thing if it was earned, but he has no claim to Sable beyond friendship. 

He pauses. 

Well, maybe that should change. Tonight. Before any chance is gone. 

He snaps his book shut and stands, making his way over to the fire, sitting down next to Sable just a little closer than strictly necessary. Halsin glances toward him, and offers the other man a slight smile, and the vampire doesn’t quite like how knowing it seems. “Astarion, was it? I owe you my thanks as well for my freedom. You’re quite impressive with that bow.” 

He preens, leaning back on his hands and crossing one ankle over the over. “I’m all kinds of impressive, and how astute of you to notice.” Halsin’s lips twitch. “I was just curious what my kitten was laughing about. Must be a grand tale,” he purrs. 

Sable flushes darkly and nudges Astarion’s shoulder as the elder druid’s eyebrow raises high. “Must you use that nickname in front of a new companion?!” 

“Yes,” he replies smugly. “We have two days travel back to the grove, and I hardly like calling you anything else anymore.” He meets Halsin’s eyes, and though his tone sounds the same, there’s a weight to his gaze that the other man definitely sees. “He should get used to it.” 

Halsin is not a dumb man, and he knows a claim when he sees one. He just chuckles and gives Sable a pat on the shoulder, before standing. “I think it’s cute. You should be happy he likes you enough to give you a nickname.” He turns to go, but can’t resist a tiny jab over his shoulder. “Considering how prickly he seems.” 

“Prickly?!” Astarion splutters as the newest member of the camp ducks into his tent. “I am not…prickly!” Sable gives him a flat look. “...well, all right, sometimes I can be a little…touchy.” He lowers his voice. “But I really can’t be blamed, my kitten. Not in this instance.” 

“Why’s that?” she replies, poking at the fire with a stick with a little more ire than strictly necessary. 

He blinks at her. Does she not…? “Why do you think?” he all but purrs, leaning towards her slightly. 

“I don’t know. You’re acting weird tonight, Astarion. I don’t know why you had to chase him off, I was having fun talking to him,” she grumbles, pulling her knees up to her chest. 

He almost gapes at her. Then he can’t help the laugh that bubbles out of his throat, a delighted almost-giggle. “Darling, you are almost too cute to stand.” He cocks his head, then stands and offers her his hand. “Come with me. There’s something I’d like to ask you in private.” 

She stares at his hand for a moment, before meeting his eyes. She thinks back to last night, about her words. I trust you.

She takes his hand and lets him lead her into the dark.

[starsunfirelight]

Ok so

I was too scared to post this before, but I think I'm going to do it now:

inspiration to finally post this:

a channel I watch all the time at the end of the year/when I remember/when it gets recommended to me lol

finally validated my opinions, when I thought I was alone

then someone in the comments mentioned a different channel so I thought i'd check it out:

and things started making a lot of sense. it's like this one person had the common sense that I could feel was missing from seemingly everyone I interacted with (watch videos) on the internet.

So I watch this:

after another video, and it's one I'd been meaning to watch a lot sooner, but it's been in my watch later for a long time and I guess it just got buried and I forgot about it lol

I never really check the watch later playlist unless I'm really bored and it's something I remember

(I am 100% a Spooky girl by the way (though for a different- I guess not directly but I have the vibes and those are things that I would do if it wasn't for the fact that I can't for some reason (yes I see the hypocrisy here but trust me on this)) and have been aware of it this whole time and it's also the exact type of person that I really hate and I think the word for it for the general public is "poser") (which is way more accurate to what I am imo)

(but like I get where they're all coming from and hope that they can all move on and get a more happier life where they can commit :> not sure what (face expression in the form of an emoticon/emoji) to put here but oh well )

but anyways, here we go!

(copy and pasted from my notes app) (wrote in the style of a YouTube video (at least at first) bc I am not original or creative but I just wanted to have fun lol) (more like have fun complaining and it was really bothering me and I just had to get it out there somehow) (I legit listened to this song for like 3 days straight until I had memorized all of the lyrics before the song would finally leave my head. :[ ) (again with the face thing, wanted to indicate mildly sad but frustrated not disappointed)

thoughts from today:

(the sentiment is totally taken straight from the comment section of the above videos and her performance with the cake being all messed up on SNL recently)

oliv (sic) is good and bad at the same time, but she’s getting better :)

I got target audience hit so hard like wow

olivia needs to learn to “kill” what she doesn’t like and go all in on being herself, :) it’s already happenin :)

still totally hate her producer by the way, if not specifically for these songs

like Blake put 90's(? idk I forget exactly it's been a while since I went obsessively looking for every single reaction video to her new song to see if anyone out there had the same opinion as me, but more as a way to see what opinon I "should" be having which sounds insane, I know, but I can't/ok couldn't help it and now I realize this is just high school glorified 😔 (ok real last edit so far (haha take that edits later) this was something I only begun to notice starting from Casually Explained's video (found via a hasanabi clip on my recommended who I clicked on bc of QT(he's a podcast host with her and his takes are so bad they're funny but I only know found out (have a better idea of now that I grew up more) they're bad because of other streamers but anyways-) https://youtu.be/MspHbnfEGno?si=KiiMRDYPIc9TK-TF) (here's a link to the original full video: https://youtu.be/l4Ioj4BA6N0?si=gUQ3ZeoyZ3DcGXLy) and then this one https://youtu.be/pII6mLdNawk?si=EWSF_g8Pl0fLOXHG and finally make the connection here myself lol)) but anyways put those drums on the track as a backing and it sounded SO MUCH BETTER than the original

so like yeah she definitely has the spirit, she just needs to talk to the right people, trust and learn from them, and have more people say "no" to her.

like seriously, and then she'll be really good!

like I mean it, her tracks are SO CLOSE to being really good, and I can see the idea behind them, that it makes me a little mad

all it needs is just a little creativity, or at least someone who really knows what they are doing and how to best implement it

like people think the production on the 1989 vault tracks left something to be desired and started making their own mixes, and I think that's what people should do with some of olivia rodrigo's music too! ok but like pretty isn't pretty was pretty much perfect so don't mess with that one lol

and also why I think the live performances sometimes sound so much better than the recorded version lol

y'know what? that could be a solution right there!

If you're bad at mixing, just do it live! Then it's all better anyways lol

haha ok time to let you guys see what I wrote when this song came out lol

like I really didn't want to be "that person" who complained about the thing that every teenager loves right now, but now I see that my complaints were valid because it's just a matter of opinion, and it's not the reason I was so mad lol (ok maybe like 0.01% but like I've been through this before and didn't hate the thing that was popular, maybe I was jealous? idk but still my complaints were mostly not for that reason, let's say lol (was looking for 😥 but couldn't find it lol - me from later, still editing this by only adding comments as I think the original should be preserved as much as possible bc it's interesting to look back at ¯\_(ツ)_/¯) 😓😢😭💀👍🙂🐛✨ (man your recently used emojis really tell you a lot about your personality huh))

ok but anyways

here we go lol

the time is from when it was last edited on the notes app

August 3, 2023 at 18:10

hi

hey guys! So, today we’re going to be talking about 4 time Grammy winning musician Olivia Rodrigo’s latest hit single, vampire. This song reached number #1 on the Billboard hot 100 last week, and that’s almost to be expected of an artist like her. It also took YouTube by storm, (since it was sponsored, in part, haha, though I doubt it wouldn’t have blown up anyways) and I’m pretty sure it’s really popular on TikTok as well. (though I wouldn’t know, because I spend all of my time on YouTube shorts instead, lol) Ok now, personally, I liked her last album Sour, so I was excited to see what new song she came up with next! So, curious to see what it was, I checked it out on the trending page and… suffice to say, I was a little disappointed. I mean, it had such good parts, and musically, it was nice and I could tell what she was trying to do, but I mean, lyrically, I just felt like it could be better. Like, I’ve heard Taylor Swift songs in the past, and even if you don’t like her style, you’ve gotta admit she’s really good at writing lyrics. Not only does she convey her thought with such vivid imagery and a poetic stricture, but the words sound really nice to listen to as well. I’m not an English major, so I can’t go into too much depth there, but I’m sure there’s a lot of videos out there that can explain what I mean here. And as a personal anecdote, my 7th grade class was given her lyrics to Red to analyze for an assignment lol. So I mean, there’s one frame of reference for you guys, haha. But getting back to Vampire, her lyrics on there just don’t feel the same. I know they aren’t supposed to, but in its place they should adopt her own style. But to me, it just feels a bit… idk childish? I know I’m not that much older than her, but still. (Turns out she was 19 when she wrote this, which makes so much sense now, and that’s basically still a kid lol.) Taylor and Demi Lovato have both written great lyrics when they were both around her age. But, Taylor is kind of a lyrical poet, and Demi probably had a lot of help, since I looked on the Genius page and it said the song I want to compare later was cowritten by Nikki Williams, who was 25 at the time. So it’s a bit unfair to compare, but we’ll see.

Musically, I maybe I just don’t get pop opera, but I think the transition from piano to full on pop song is cool, but feels a bit misplaced. Like, it sounds like a good idea in concept, but I don’t know if it translated well. (as maybe she or the producer might have hoped.) But aside from that, maybe it’s just me but I think she liked the bridge-like(? idk just guessing here based off of my own feeling) chorus a bit too much, that she ended up relying on it to make the song great. Don’t get me wrong— musically, it’s a great part, and she should definitely be proud of herself for coming up with it as she did, but do you really have to repeat it 3 times?? I can definitely say that that it’s the key defining highlight of the song, but when you repeat it so much, it sounds tiring and overused. Imo People don’t care if you repeat the chorus a lot, because the chorus is almost meant to be repeated, but I really think that it sounds a bit too same when it’s repeated in this context. The beginning too, now that I mention it. But hey, this part could just be my own personal preference, and that’s valid too, I guess, since it’s just my opinion lol. 

And also, I heard someone say that the instrumental at the end left them wanting more, and I agree that it felt like it ended abruptly, and either it should have ended sooner, or maybe padded out a bit more? idk, but the ending just felt abrupt.

But I do have to say, I really liked the bridge part, and the rest of the song after. I just wish the whole song was good! I mean, imo they should have gone harder on the dramatic angle of it all, like maybe have her in black and white with red lipstick at the piano or something. Extend the craziness of her mind, even if she wasn’t? I don’t know haha, I don’t relate to the song, so this again this is probably just a personal preference. (lol Otto)

Especially the “girls your age know better” part was fire!!!! :)

Also, it sounds kind of like her previous songs, but that’s not really anything to worry about imo, because all artists are a bit privy to that, she said that’s what she was going for, in which case she nailed the “same but kinda different” kind of thing, and it’s not a bad thing imo.

But, I guess, now it’s time to look at the ;lyrics. (warning, I think some of it is childish and a bit cringe. if not, just hoping it could be better :(. )

Now, I know that writing good lyrics really doesn’t have to do with age, but more about your own maturity, and your maturity as a writer. I know it’s a bit unfair to compare as I made those comparisons before, but if you look into the lyrics a bit, hopefully you’ll start to see what I mean.

without further ado, here we go…

I ʜᴀᴛᴇ ᴛᴏ ɢɪᴠᴇ ᴛʜᴇ sᴀᴛɪsғᴀᴄᴛɪᴏɴ Asᴋɪɴɢ, “Hᴏᴡ ʏᴏᴜ’ʀᴇ ᴅᴏɪɴɢ ɴᴏᴡ?” “Hᴏᴡ’s ᴛʜᴇ ᴄᴀsᴛʟᴇ ʙᴜɪʟᴛ ᴏғғ ᴘᴇᴏᴘʟᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ᴘʀᴇᴛᴇɴᴅ ᴛᴏ ᴄᴀʀᴇ ᴀʙᴏᴜᴛ?” Jᴜsᴛ ᴡʜᴀᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴡᴀɴᴛᴇᴅ Lᴏᴏᴋ ᴀᴛ ʏᴏᴜ, ᴄᴏᴏʟ ɢᴜʏ, ʏᴏᴜ ɢᴏᴛ ɪᴛ

Ok, so this isn’t too bad, (now after listening about 100 times I like the first 4 lines! :D) but “Lᴏᴏᴋ ᴀᴛ ʏᴏᴜ, ᴄᴏᴏʟ ɢᴜʏ, ʏᴏᴜ ɢᴏᴛ ɪᴛ” sounds a bit playful, if not childish. If she’s taking on a childish tone on purpose because she’s still very “naive” as she mentions later, then I have to commend her for her genius. But also, it might show up unintentionally, as she mentioned that this song just came out of her head one day after a bad experience, so as a child, this might be just how she thinks, and on the spot, this is what she thought of. It makes me kind of miffed, and it’s a bit hard to listen to, but you can’t really blame her at the end of the day. Plus it sounds kind of cool! :D lkokolololol <- me on no sleep

I sᴇᴇ ᴛʜᴇ ᴘᴀʀᴛɪᴇs ᴀɴᴅ ᴛʜᴇ ᴅɪᴀᴍᴏɴᴅs sᴏᴍᴇᴛɪᴍᴇs ᴡʜᴇɴ I ᴄʟᴏsᴇ ᴍʏ ᴇʏᴇs Sɪx ᴍᴏɴᴛʜs ᴏғ ᴛᴏʀᴛᴜʀᴇ ʏᴏᴜ sᴏʟᴅ ᴀs sᴏᴍᴇ ғᴏʀʙɪᴅᴅᴇɴ ᴘᴀʀᴀᴅɪsᴇ I ʟᴏᴠᴇᴅ ʏᴏᴜ ᴛʀᴜʟʏ Yᴏᴜ ɢᴏᴛᴛᴀ ʟᴀᴜɢʜ ᴀᴛ ᴛʜᴇ sᴛᴜᴘɪᴅɪᴛʏ

Yo, can we take some time to take in the scenery? No? Ok, I guess that’s ok, and I’lll be in my own corner doing that I guess, lol :D (also comes up later, but that point it’s slow and I think it’s— you’ll find out later :))

Again, it’s fine, maybe trying a bit too hard, but the one thing that makes me mad is “stupidity”. It sounds so childish compared to the rest of the lyrics there, and I can’t think of a better lyric off of the top of my head, but I just know I wouldn’t use that word there— it gives me the ick, if you know what I mean.

it has real “they ask you how you are, and you just have to say you're fine when you're not really fine, but you just can't get into it, because they would never understand.” vibes lol.

here’s the chorus!! (though it feels like a bridge imo until the last two lines, but maybe that’s just the genre haha)

<3 love it sm omg !!! heart heart heart!!! :)

‘Cᴀᴜsᴇ I’ᴠᴇ ᴍᴀᴅᴇ sᴏᴍᴇ ʀᴇᴀʟ ʙɪɢ ᴍɪsᴛᴀᴋᴇs Bᴜᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴍᴀᴋᴇ ᴛʜᴇ ᴡᴏʀsᴛ ᴏɴᴇ ʟᴏᴏᴋ ғɪɴᴇ I sʜᴏᴜʟᴅ’ᴠᴇ ᴋɴᴏᴡɴ ɪᴛ ᴡᴀs sᴛʀᴀɴɢᴇ Yᴏᴜ ᴏɴʟʏ ᴄᴏᴍᴇ ᴏᴜᴛ ᴀᴛ ɴɪɢʜᴛ

I ᴜsᴇᴅ ᴛᴏ ᴛʜɪɴᴋ I ᴡᴀs sᴍᴀʀᴛ Bᴜᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴍᴀᴅᴇ ᴍᴇ ʟᴏᴏᴋ sᴏ ɴᴀɪ̈ᴠᴇ Tʜᴇ ᴡᴀʏ ʏᴏ��� sᴏʟᴅ ᴍᴇ ғᴏʀ ᴘᴀʀᴛs As ʏᴏᴜ sᴜɴᴋ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴛᴇᴇᴛʜ ɪɴᴛᴏ ᴍᴇ Oʜ, ʙʟᴏᴏᴅsᴜᴄᴋᴇʀ, ᴅʀᴇᴀᴍ ᴄʀᴜsʜᴇʀ

Bʟᴇᴇᴅɪɴɢ ᴍᴇ ᴅʀʏ ʟɪᴋᴇ ᴀ … ᴠᴀᴍᴘɪʀᴇ

mentions the theme at the end, yay! lol like it wasn’t present before haha

and here comes my theory that the management wanted this part to take off on TikTok all along, because it’s really good (musically imo) but didn’t really put as much attention on the rest? Like girl, I thought we were on the same page about hating songs only made for TikTok! really short, and only having one good part, like you can tell! 

Like “If We Ever Broke Up” by Mae Stephens is the perfect _counter_ to this argument, because it got popular on TikTok and every part of that song is catchy and good, and I think the whole song is perfect. But then again, it’s also kind of short, but also I don’t think it needs to be longer, because then it’s overdone. 

But maybe the way Vampire was written was just because it was difficult to come up with! Idk, but I think it could really be due to anything, and I can’t say for sure, I know that. But anyways, I think lyrically, it’s a bit weak. and the ending made me want to listen to it more, which is a TikTok move, but also just because the song has some really good parts in it, which is just because the song is nice and not a TikTok move I don’t think haha :)

Honestly, “‘Cᴀᴜsᴇ I’ᴠᴇ ᴍᴀᴅᴇ sᴏᴍᴇ ʀᴇᴀʟ ʙɪɢ ᴍɪsᴛᴀᴋᴇs” has kind of the same energy as “For one day, one day / I was really, really, really, really sad” by One Whole Day by Dixie D’Amelio. And she didn’t even write that song!

and so every time I hear that lyric, I get kind of cringe, it’s a bit sad. :( lol

but now I don’t mind after listening to it for like the 100th time lol

Moving on…

“Bᴜᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴍᴀᴋᴇ ᴛʜᴇ ᴡᴏʀsᴛ ᴏɴᴇ ʟᴏᴏᴋ ғɪɴᴇ” this line is fine, and it would probably be fine among a sea of other lines that are better, but even still, it would be the weakest out of those lines, but satisfying nonetheless.

This song may be musically satisfying, but lyrically, it’s not. (edit, again, after listening to it about 100 times, I now don’t care about most of it but “dream crusher” still sounds cringe, but the go version probably isn’t.) I may not understand the pain, and I understand that in the middle of writing this song, she was probably thinking about her own emotional pain and not really caring about the lyrics, so I get why it’s like this, and I don’t mind one bit, because that’s her song. And, I mean, She probably wouldn’t have released it of she didn’t like it. haha, unless she was rushed? idk. probably not though!

But still, if you take that aspect away, it’s a bit hard to visualize, appearing weak at times, with a tell not show kind of approach, and at other times it feels like she’s trying too hard, giving the whole song an amateur kind of feel. But Sour wasn’t like this, and I just can’t get why. Like good 4 u had a lot of repetition too, but that was fine, because it felt like that part that was repeated was _meant_ to be repeated, and it was satisfying when it did. You knew what to expect, and it was a little predicable but that was fine. It was nice, even. But this song feels predictable in a kinda bad way, and I don’t really understand why. :(

Ok, back to looking at the lyrics, lol.

“I sʜᴏᴜʟᴅ’ᴠᴇ ᴋɴᴏᴡɴ ɪᴛ ᴡᴀs sᴛʀᴀɴɢᴇ Yᴏᴜ ᴏɴʟʏ ᴄᴏᴍᴇ ᴏᴜᴛ ᴀᴛ ɴɪɢʜᴛ”

These lines are fire, and I like them. :) Not trying too hard, but not too weak either. It’s great :)

“I ᴜsᴇᴅ ᴛᴏ ᴛʜɪɴᴋ I ᴡᴀs sᴍᴀʀᴛ Bᴜᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴍᴀᴅᴇ ᴍᴇ ʟᴏᴏᴋ sᴏ ɴᴀɪ̈ᴠᴇ”

These lines make it sound like she still is very much naive, even if she didn’t mean it to sound that way. It’s also very her, especially in the way that she phrased it while singing, so I have to give her credit for that. Maybe this one is just a personal preference, for me lol Like maybe it rings true for her because it was and it’s just something that I’ve never thought about lol :)

Listening back, it sounds more like a facepalm than anything.

More lyrics…

“Tʜᴇ ᴡᴀʏ ʏᴏᴜ sᴏʟᴅ ᴍᴇ ғᴏʀ ᴘᴀʀᴛs As ʏᴏᴜ sᴜɴᴋ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴛᴇᴇᴛʜ ɪɴᴛᴏ ᴍᴇ”

Ok, this part just sounds like she is trying too hard, which just makes me sad :(

Like I get imagery, for imagery’s sake, and like she really wanted to make this work, but still, I believe you’ll find the right balance someday as you mature as an artist and a person! :D I believe in you!!! <3

“Oʜ, ʙʟᴏᴏᴅsᴜᴄᴋᴇʀ, ᴅʀᴇᴀᴍ ᴄʀᴜsʜᴇʀ”

“Bʟᴇᴇᴅɪɴɢ ᴍᴇ ᴅʀʏ ʟɪᴋᴇ ᴀ … ᴠᴀᴍᴘɪʀᴇ”

 I like this part, especially the rhythmic feel to it as the song speeds up later. I think the clean version is a bit silly though, and having the not clean version in the second line really delivers the impact. Though that same impact isn’t really felt for me in the first line, and “ʙʟᴏᴏᴅsᴜᴄᴋᴇʀ” had more impact than when she used the bad word I think trying to have an impact (but that could also be just because I don’t know the context of that word, or it just sounds weird coming from a child like her, not really understanding the power that that word holds, but still wants people to take her seriously and think of her as a person who uses that word like “I’m not the kid that you think I am”). Haha, at this point I think she has more impact when she writes from the heart and isn’t trying lol. But that could be totally untrue, but it would be funny lol.

“Aɴᴅ ᴇᴠᴇʀʏ ɢɪʀʟ I ᴇᴠᴇʀ ᴛᴀʟᴋᴇᴅ ᴛᴏ Tᴏʟᴅ ᴍᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ᴡᴇʀᴇ ʙᴀᴅ, ʙᴀᴅ ɴᴇᴡs Yᴏᴜ ᴄᴀʟʟᴇᴅ ᴛʜᴇᴍ ᴄʀᴀᴢʏ Gᴏᴅ, I ʜᴀᴛᴇ ᴛʜᴇ ᴡᴀʏ I ᴄᴀʟʟᴇᴅ ᴛʜᴇᴍ ᴄʀᴀᴢʏ ᴛᴏᴏ Yᴏᴜ’ʀᴇ sᴏ ᴄᴏɴᴠɪɴᴄɪɴɢ”

This sounds like classic high school drama from one perspective, but like her friends really care about her, from another. 

Musically, I wish it was more different than the opening, but I guess changing the beat kind of does that haha. It’s not bad, I guess. :0

“Hᴏᴡ ᴅᴏ ʏᴏᴜ ʟɪᴇ ᴡɪᴛʜᴏᴜᴛ ғʟɪɴᴄʜɪɴɢ?”

What does this mean? Is this just there for the rhyme?

Like, if you’re only going for rhyme, I found this in the BuzzFeed article I was reading earlier of of curiosity “"Maybe then we could pretend / There's no gravity in the words we write / Maybe you didn't mean it / Maybe "blonde" was the only rhyme."” -Skin by Sabrina Carpenter

which I thought was way better lyrics than most of Olivia Rodrigo’s entire song Vampire. Just looking at the lyrics, and has nothing to do with their personal relationship, as I don’t really know about that.

But then again, maybe I was just too harsh, and this is just a reference to something that I don’t understand. Like I wouldn’t personally think about “flinching” when it comes to lying unless it was under a very specific context, but maybe that’s what Olivia Rodrigo is hinting at here, without explaining the whole story.

“(Hᴏᴡ ᴅᴏ ʏᴏᴜ ʟɪᴇ? Hᴏᴡ ᴅᴏ ʏᴏᴜ ʟɪᴇ? Hᴏᴡ ᴅᴏ ʏᴏᴜ ʟɪᴇ?)”

Initially I thought Again, trying a bit too hard here, or maybe it didn’t really come across, but I like the idea that they were going for. 

But after reanalyzing the line before this, it makes more sense in that context, and also explains why she would be really hurt here. Especially because she repeats the line a lot, maybe meaning that he lied multiple times and really hurt her to make her want to repeat that line that much.

“Oʜ, ᴡʜᴀᴛ ᴀ ᴍᴇsᴍᴇʀɪᴢɪɴɢ, ᴘᴀʀᴀʟʏᴢɪɴɢ, ᴛʀᴀɢɪᴄ ʟɪᴛᴛʟᴇ ᴛʜʀɪʟʟ Cᴀɴ’ᴛ ғɪɢᴜʀᴇ ᴏᴜᴛ ᴊᴜsᴛ ʜᴏᴡ ʏᴏᴜ ᴅᴏ ɪᴛ Aɴᴅ Gᴏᴅ ᴋɴᴏᴡs I ɴᴇᴠᴇʀ ᴡɪʟʟ Wᴇɴᴛ ғᴏʀ ᴍᴇ ᴀɴᴅ ɴᴏᴛ ʜᴇʀ ‘Cᴀᴜsᴇ ɢɪʀʟs ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴀɢᴇ ᴋɴᴏᴡ ʙᴇᴛᴛᴇʀ”

This part is nice, “Oʜ, ᴡʜᴀᴛ ᴀ ᴍᴇsᴍᴇʀɪᴢɪɴɢ, ᴘᴀʀᴀʟʏᴢɪɴɢ, ᴛʀᴀɢɪᴄ ʟɪᴛᴛʟᴇ ᴛʜʀɪʟʟ” is kind of a lot to say at once, but I can respect it, it’s kind of like a emotion cake lol. “‘Cᴀᴜsᴇ ɢɪʀʟs ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴀɢᴇ ᴋɴᴏᴡ ʙᴇᴛᴛᴇʀ” :) those two last lines remind of her last album, and she does it so well here. :)

The bridge and chorus again sound epic with the increased tension from the instrumental :)

“Yᴏᴜ sᴀɪᴅ, “Iᴛ ᴡᴀs ᴛʀᴜᴇ ʟᴏᴠᴇ”, ʙᴜᴛ ᴡᴏᴜʟᴅɴ’ᴛ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ʙᴇ ʜᴀʀᴅ? Yᴏᴜ ᴄᴀɴ’ᴛ ʟᴏᴠᴇ ᴀɴʏᴏɴᴇ, ‘ᴄᴀᴜsᴇ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ᴡᴏᴜʟᴅ ᴍᴇᴀɴ ʏᴏᴜ ʜᴀᴅ ᴀ ʜᴇᴀʀᴛ I ᴛʀɪᴇᴅ ʏᴏᴜ ʜᴇʟᴘ ʏᴏᴜ ᴏᴜᴛ, ɴᴏᴡ I ᴋɴᴏᴡ ᴛʜᴀᴛ I ᴄᴀɴ’ᴛ ‘Cᴀᴜsᴇ ʜᴏᴡ ʏᴏᴜ ᴛʜɪɴᴋ’s ᴛʜᴇ ᴋɪɴᴅ ᴏғ ᴛʜɪɴɢ I’ʟʟ ɴᴇᴠᴇʀ ᴜɴᴅᴇʀsᴛᴀɴᴅ”

Now this really feels like her old album, and I really like this part :)

It’s really good, maintains her style lol, and no notes from me here :)

this part emotion makes up for aaall of the lyrics haha :)

or maybe that’s the lyrics? rhythm? idk, I just like this part, haha :)

“Yᴏᴜ ᴄᴀɴ’ᴛ ʟᴏᴠᴇ ᴀɴʏᴏɴᴇ, ‘ᴄᴀᴜsᴇ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ᴡᴏᴜʟᴅ ᴍᴇᴀɴ ʏᴏᴜ ʜᴀᴅ ᴀ ʜᴇᴀʀᴛ” especially goes hard, and she’s finally writing in a way that’s not only really good poetry but sounds good to hear! I’m so glad! But she doesn’t have to do this if she doesn’t have to, I just think it’s cool that she did it here, haha

At first I was like did you really have to repeat the iconic part a third time? or is it the chorus at this point? Or was it all along? (yes) :thinking: emoji, but after a while, it’s not that bad. It rocks! And only listening to the last part of the song is epic!!!!!! :D the leadup, however it was executed, was worth it, haha :)

Overall, this song is not bad, great at times, even, but I just wish it was better because I get frustrated at its potential, especially because it reminds me of other songs that are really great at times like Heart Attack by Demi Lovato, and I really love that song, and it makes me frustrated that this song isn’t that one :(. After the “‘Cᴀᴜsᴇ ʜᴏᴡ ʏᴏᴜ ᴛʜɪɴᴋ’s ᴛʜᴇ ᴋɪɴᴅ ᴏғ ᴛʜɪɴɢ I’ʟʟ ɴᴇᴠᴇʀ ᴜɴᴅᴇʀsᴛᴀɴᴅ” I’d often go into the chorus from Heart Attack lol :).

But seriously, Like, I get your range is limited, and it’s all about holding in that tension and not letting it go until the line drops (you know the one), but would it kill mainstream music to not hover around the same three notes every time? I’ve noticed it was a problem since Halsey’s “Without Me”, where I really felt that, (editor me from now stepping in to say that I didn't think of this, I just held it in my brain from another youtube video that I had watched years ago but then thought I should "agree" with it without really knowing about what I really thought (based on actually listening to the music) myself lol but then again I did notice it a bit more after I had it pointed out to me, mostly in Halsey - Without Me and Katy Perry - Never Really Over but that last one kinda I had the thought myself a bit at first but then I watched another youtube video and they really pointed to it there as the "death of pop music" but maybe not necessarily with the repeating/range I think idk it was a long time ago and I also liked Paramore - Hard Times a lot at this time but anyways) but maybe it’s just a stylistic choice that I got frustrated by lol, and in general all music isn’t like that. idk about this to say any more.

alright, I think that’s all of my thoughts about this song. ok bye! have a good night/day! :)

Oh wait one more thing. I want to address stan culture, the thing that I wanted to make this video about the most. You see, if you’ve noticed, on the comment section of this song, in most places that I looked, it was hard to find a single comment that was even sightly negative. Now, this could just mean that it’s a good song, but given the complaints I just had that I talked about earlier, it was hard for me to believe that was the case. In fact, that was what kind of started this whole thing, lol. But then, as I looked a bit further on the reviews for the iTunes store, I saw that there were a few people that had the same complaints as I did. There were very few “nope”/“bad song”’s. You don’t like the song? Maybe you’re just not a fan of the genre as a whole, and that’s ok. It’s always (I think) ok to have an opinion. It’s too “copy and paste”? Not original, but still good? Yeah ok, but still, they didn’t comment on whether it was bad or good, and the others admitted it was still good. idk if it’s good to copy and paste or not, but it might e subconscious, and imo who cares (besides the record labels) (as long as you give credit) because it can end up with some really fun music out of it! :) The other comments said it was rushed and it sounded like an amateur. This is something that I kind of talked about in the section before, and if it’s true then I really hope she gets better! :) And a few people were like “meh”, essentially, and still though admitted it was good in some way. So, I guess most of the internet agrees it’s good, just some of us hoping for better. 

Now, the really interesting part happened when I looked at another video by a different artist, for just another reason, not really related to this, just kind of happened to see it by chance. It was Taylor Swift’s Anti Hero lyric video, and in the comments, most of them were positive too. But, they were positive in a different way. Both positive, don’t worry :)

Taylor: I love the lyricism, even if you don’t like her you gotta admit it’s good, I relate heavily to this, and just generally pointing out a certain lyric that they like, with some fans just being a fan of the artist. But most people I think were there just () for the song.

Olivia: Kind of the same vibes, but more people liking “omg olivia you’re awesome I can’t believe you did this so proud of you!” which is great but also can lean towards stan behavior (:/), and also “I just love how she sings with emotion”. :) and occasionally “that one line hits really hard.” (hey, I said that too! glad we agree :)) (editor me here to say that I took those comments to heart and formed my own opinion after hearing theirs) But there were also people who were like “I really resonate with this song” “thank you for helping me get through a tough time” and feeling cathartic, which is really nice to see :’)

So, future fans, I advise you to be civil, and maybe not just blindly support your favorite artist because you like them as a person or like their past work. This is just a reminder, just because you like an artist, or even just one song by an artist, doesn’t mean you have to like every sing one of their songs, or go to great lengths to defend them of any wrong lol. You should personally not be responsible for the financial success of your favorite artist. Just tell your friends, but if they’re not into it, leave it alone, chill. If you like it, then you buy the song. If you like it, you listen to the song. that’s really it.

just be happy :)

just be you :)

it’s ok to have an opinion! even if it’s different from people that you love! (unless it’s a super serious important one that’s just mean or something, then hopefully you can try to respect others even if you don’t agree, and try to see other’s pov I hope again unless it’s really bad)

otherwise the world would be boring lol (I mean about having different opinions from one another)

also absolutely no hate to the teens and people that needed this song the most <3 hope you’re ok 😭👍

ohh maybe 

(I feel a disconnect with this song) bc teens relate to this song and I’m not a teen anymore. ok, yeah, that explains a lot haha. :0 :)

I’ve always wanted to let the world “let teens be teens”, and give them a lot of love as they grow up, and it looks like it’s finally happening :)))

this song is addictive fs, at least it definitely is/was for me

also it’s funny how she was a fake celeb and now she’s a real internet celeb, and that’s funny lol

I don’t have to like this song, nor do I have to force other people to like it too.

teens like it. let em be.

(ok editor me here, this is the part where I was jotting down random thoughts as I had them, kind of like a notebook lol)

y’know I like this song but I feel like it’s missing something…

I just feel like if she used jazz chords instead of the normal boring generic ones she’s already used before, it could be a much cooler song! Like driver’s license was meant to be generic, and the chords work well there, but this feels like it could use something more!!!!

Oh, ok, I see the Queen inspo now. (editor me, this was in response much later to reading a comment that said so lol, bc I didn't hear it at first lol)

Also explains why everyone likes it, haha xD

it’s like her own style combined with their’s

Like songs

Heart Attack

Some piano ballad - Queen, Taylor Swift

Senorita

Paramore

Avril Lavigne

Gothic/Victorian

Emo - the last two lines of the chorus

Birthday - Katy Perry

ABBA, duh!

Miley Cyrus

BTR (I think, probably just the vibes of the genre)\

Lewis Capaldi

used to ba a sad boy with (idk just lyrics) are jepson era

Without Me - Halsey ^

Pink

Linkin Park

it needs more ���aesthetic 💓💝💘!!!! ❣️💝❤️‍🩹(couldn’t find the sparkles lol)

Piano Ballad/Queen

(editor me, this is where I pasted the original lyrics and jotted down some of my thoughts there lol, so it's kind of like a "behind the scenes" of the YouTube video lol)

(editor me, but also more of in the notebooks vein where it's what I "cut out" from the video lol to stay on topic/not make it too long winded but here I am writing about it here lol (gosh I really hated part of this song, and I still kinda do, and I'm not going to deny it/hide it anymore because that is what I feel is the right thing to do) (but like not going to bring it up when nobody asked lol, except I guess this could be different lol since _I_ asked and I can post whatever I want as long as I think it's ok and hopefully not being unfair/mean 😥))

(editor me here, also this was me desperately trying to find what this reminded me of, and I was struggling really hard here lol (still am kinda miffed about that, but I chose to accept it and move on after I calmed down caring about this song lol, who knows maybe I'll start looking again by listening to more songs about (I mean in!) that era, haha (*insert indescribable emotion here*) (by me rn at least, :/)))

(editor me from a little later, also went back and saw that I was trying to improve it, so I guess that these were my initial frustrations with the song, or might have been from either before or after or both from when I wrote the whole YouTube video

ok I definitely remember coming back and adding to the list OFTEN as I thought of more, plus I looked up the lyrics in the process of writing the YouTube video, so I guess it was after, after all :) (me being happy I figured it out, NOt being happy about the song >:( ok I'm not that mean (or am I? 🤨 sounds fun actually lol) but didn't want it to be the sad emoticon :( <- ok now I'm a bit sad about the situation, again not the song lol (I don't think? maybe? I mean I suppose since I did say I was a bit sad earlier and I think I still feel that way about the song plus it's a "sad" song so...) (ok stop writing now the sleepiness is really kicking in right about now) )

)

(editor me again, I know you said stop but this is the last one I think, yeah I definitely found the lyrics again and pasted them here _after_ I was done writing my whole video up there, just so I could analyze them in the way that I mentioned before lol)

(still editor me here yeah and I would re paste certain parts and they reminded me of things, as I saw fit) (mmhm yes I am aware I sound like a derange obsessed lunatic and that's because I kind of was) (editor me still, don't worry now I have a love hate kinda thinking towards her lol, and have grown up a bit and try really hard not to be like the fans here, y'know fandom rememberings and what not sheesh the name-shall-npt-be-mentioned fandom is like REally bad and is like this one but like is just BAD on a lot of levels, I think it's worse (than this) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0a4yt5h5rRg like the problem is their behavior, not the content or I'd argue even the fans themselves, necessarily, the problem is when it goes too far 🙁 bit a bit more ^, like 😕 one side for both (the aforementioned side could be either, depends on the mood but both are ok ), slight frown :/)

(editior me, ok this is last now, please, yeah it's just me basically trying my best to improve the song, I think, or at least that's how the latest draft of all this reads to me anyways lol)

(still editor me, like at the time I didn't know if I wanted it this way because it was what I stereotypically "expected to hear", or just because it sounded cool (anyways it was still what _I_ expected to hear/would do, given the opportunity, I was really thinking of what would make me happy here, looking for outside influences on top of that + seeing if they match what I hear/the vibe I'm going for in my head like yes! no, maybe and all that))

I ʜᴀᴛᴇ ᴛᴏ ɢɪᴠᴇ ᴛʜᴇ sᴀᴛɪsғᴀᴄᴛɪᴏɴ Asᴋɪɴɢ, “Hᴏᴡ ʏᴏᴜ’ʀᴇ ᴅᴏɪɴɢ ɴᴏᴡ?” “Hᴏᴡ’s ᴛʜᴇ ᴄᴀsᴛʟᴇ ʙᴜɪʟᴛ ᴏғғ ᴘᴇᴏᴘʟᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ᴘʀᴇᴛᴇɴᴅ ᴛᴏ ᴄᴀʀᴇ ᴀʙᴏᴜᴛ?” Jᴜsᴛ ᴡʜᴀᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴡᴀɴᴛᴇᴅ Lᴏᴏᴋ ᴀᴛ ʏᴏᴜ, ᴄᴏᴏʟ ɢᴜʏ, ʏᴏᴜ ɢᴏᴛ ɪᴛ

Same, bit of Taylor Swift, especially in the chords

I sᴇᴇ ᴛʜᴇ ᴘᴀʀᴛɪᴇs ᴀɴᴅ ᴛʜᴇ ᴅɪᴀᴍᴏɴᴅs sᴏᴍᴇᴛɪᴍᴇs ᴡʜᴇɴ I ᴄʟᴏsᴇ ᴍʏ ᴇʏᴇs Sɪx ᴍᴏɴᴛʜs ᴏғ ᴛᴏʀᴛᴜʀᴇ ʏᴏᴜ sᴏʟᴅ ᴀs sᴏᴍᴇ ғᴏʀʙɪᴅᴅᴇɴ ᴘᴀʀᴀᴅɪsᴇ I ʟᴏᴠᴇᴅ ʏᴏᴜ ᴛʀᴜʟʏ Yᴏᴜ ɢᴏᴛᴛᴀ ʟᴀᴜɢʜ ᴀᴛ ᴛʜᴇ sᴛᴜᴘɪᴅɪᴛʏ

but also her own style I guess

Definitely her own style, or I just can’t tell what it’s copying (opera!!! :))

‘Cᴀᴜsᴇ I’ᴠᴇ ᴍᴀᴅᴇ sᴏᴍᴇ ʀᴇᴀʟ ʙɪɢ ᴍɪsᴛᴀᴋᴇs Bᴜᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴍᴀᴋᴇ ᴛʜᴇ ᴡᴏʀsᴛ ᴏɴᴇ ʟᴏᴏᴋ ғɪɴᴇ I sʜᴏᴜʟᴅ’ᴠᴇ ᴋɴᴏᴡɴ ɪᴛ ᴡᴀs sᴛʀᴀɴɢᴇ Yᴏᴜ ᴏɴʟʏ ᴄᴏᴍᴇ ᴏᴜᴛ ᴀᴛ ɴɪɢʜᴛ

I ᴜsᴇᴅ ᴛᴏ ᴛʜɪɴᴋ I ᴡᴀs sᴍᴀʀᴛ Bᴜᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴍᴀᴅᴇ ᴍᴇ ʟᴏᴏᴋ sᴏ ɴᴀɪ̈ᴠᴇ Tʜᴇ ᴡᴀʏ ʏᴏᴜ sᴏʟᴅ ᴍᴇ ғᴏʀ ᴘᴀʀᴛs As ʏᴏᴜ sᴜɴᴋ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴛᴇᴇᴛʜ ɪɴᴛᴏ ᴍᴇ

Paramore Oʜ, ʙʟᴏᴏᴅsᴜᴄᴋᴇʀ, ᴅʀᴇᴀᴍ ᴄʀᴜsʜᴇʀ

Avril Lavigne

Bʟᴇᴇᴅɪɴɢ ᴍᴇ ᴅʀʏ ʟɪᴋᴇ ᴀ … ᴠᴀᴍᴘɪʀᴇ

Her style, more tension rising buildup in the instrumental, pop ->

“Aɴᴅ ᴇᴠᴇʀʏ ɢɪʀʟ I ᴇᴠᴇʀ ᴛᴀʟᴋᴇᴅ ᴛᴏ Tᴏʟᴅ ᴍᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ᴡᴇʀᴇ ʙᴀᴅ, ʙᴀᴅ ɴᴇᴡs Yᴏᴜ ᴄᴀʟʟᴇᴅ ᴛʜᴇᴍ ᴄʀᴀᴢʏ Gᴏᴅ, I ʜᴀᴛᴇ ᴛʜᴇ ᴡᴀʏ I ᴄᴀʟʟᴇᴅ ᴛʜᴇᴍ ᴄʀᴀᴢʏ ᴛᴏᴏ Yᴏᴜ’ʀᴇ sᴏ ᴄᴏɴᴠɪɴᴄɪɴɢ”

This is something but can’t figure out what it is

“(Hᴏᴡ ᴅᴏ ʏᴏᴜ ʟɪᴇ? Hᴏᴡ ᴅᴏ ʏᴏᴜ ʟɪᴇ? Hᴏᴡ ᴅᴏ ʏᴏᴜ ʟɪᴇ?)”

More emo? idk leading up towards a genre change (makes sense from a theatre perspective) (editor me, I had just heard a comment/maybe it was a (reaction?) video or both say that this was inspired by theatre and was like ohhh, that makes a lot of sense actually)

“Oʜ, ᴡʜᴀᴛ ᴀ ᴍᴇsᴍᴇʀɪᴢɪɴɢ, ᴘᴀʀᴀʟʏᴢɪɴɢ, ᴛʀᴀɢɪᴄ ʟɪᴛᴛʟᴇ ᴛʜʀɪʟʟ Cᴀɴ’ᴛ ғɪɢᴜʀᴇ ᴏᴜᴛ ᴊᴜsᴛ ʜᴏᴡ ʏᴏᴜ ᴅᴏ ɪᴛ Aɴᴅ Gᴏᴅ ᴋɴᴏᴡs I ɴᴇᴠᴇʀ ᴡɪʟʟ Wᴇɴᴛ ғᴏʀ ᴍᴇ ᴀɴᴅ ɴᴏᴛ ʜᴇʀ ‘Cᴀᴜsᴇ ɢɪʀʟs ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴀɢᴇ ᴋɴᴏᴡ ʙᴇᴛᴛᴇʀ” -add a sick drum line after this

Victorian/Gothic (imagine the background music and she’s running away) (or else if it’s positive it could pass as emo)

either way this part sounds cool, because of the way she sings it and builds the rising tension

‘Cᴀᴜsᴇ I’ᴠᴇ ᴍᴀᴅᴇ sᴏᴍᴇ ʀᴇᴀʟ ʙɪɢ ᴍɪsᴛᴀᴋᴇs Bᴜᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴍᴀᴋᴇ ᴛʜᴇ ᴡᴏʀsᴛ ᴏɴᴇ ʟᴏᴏᴋ ғɪɴᴇ -> hit the minor key or the 2nd or the 5th or the 7th or sustained or whatever that chord is, like I said, makes the song cool! I sʜᴏᴜʟᴅ’ᴠᴇ ᴋɴᴏᴡɴ ɪᴛ ᴡᴀs sᴛʀᴀɴɢᴇ Yᴏᴜ ᴏɴʟʏ ᴄᴏᴍᴇ ᴏᴜᴛ ᴀᴛ ɴɪɢʜᴛ

I ᴜsᴇᴅ ᴛᴏ ᴛʜɪɴᴋ I ᴡᴀs sᴍᴀʀᴛ Bᴜᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴍᴀᴅᴇ ᴍᴇ ʟᴏᴏᴋ sᴏ ɴᴀɪ̈ᴠᴇ Tʜᴇ ᴡᴀʏ ʏᴏᴜ sᴏʟᴅ ᴍᴇ ғᴏʀ ᴘᴀʀᴛs As ʏᴏᴜ sᴜɴᴋ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴛᴇᴇᴛʜ ɪɴᴛᴏ ᴍᴇ

Paramore Oʜ, ʙʟᴏᴏᴅsᴜᴄᴋᴇʀ, ᴅʀᴇᴀᴍ ᴄʀᴜsʜᴇʀ

Avril Lavigne

Bʟᴇᴇᴅɪɴɢ ᴍᴇ ᴅʀʏ ʟɪᴋᴇ ᴀ … ᴠᴀᴍᴘɪʀᴇ -> country? for some reason? :)?

This is classic her style, I would say Taylor Swift but this is her style that’s inspired

“Yᴏᴜ sᴀɪᴅ, “Iᴛ ᴡᴀs ᴛʀᴜᴇ ʟᴏᴠᴇ”, ʙᴜᴛ ᴡᴏᴜʟᴅɴ’ᴛ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ʙᴇ ʜᴀʀᴅ? Yᴏᴜ ᴄᴀɴ’ᴛ ʟᴏᴠᴇ ᴀɴʏᴏɴᴇ, ‘ᴄᴀᴜsᴇ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ᴡᴏᴜʟᴅ ᴍᴇᴀɴ ʏᴏᴜ ʜᴀᴅ ᴀ ʜᴇᴀʀᴛ <- expect a run here for some reason, but then it’s cool but not her style? I ᴛʀɪᴇᴅ ʏᴏᴜ ʜᴇʟᴘ ʏᴏᴜ ᴏᴜᴛ, ɴᴏᴡ I ᴋɴᴏᴡ ᴛʜᴀᴛ I ᴄᴀɴ’ᴛ <- a darker sound? ‘Cᴀᴜsᴇ ʜᴏᴡ ʏᴏᴜ ᴛʜɪɴᴋ’s ᴛʜᴇ ᴋɪɴᴅ ᴏғ ᴛʜɪɴɢ I’ʟʟ ɴᴇᴠᴇʀ ᴜɴᴅᴇʀsᴛᴀɴᴅ”

Now this is more pop/emo/her style, which is cool because it’s like the final act of the play, ABBA! :)

‘Cᴀᴜsᴇ I’ᴠᴇ ᴍᴀᴅᴇ sᴏᴍᴇ ʀᴇᴀʟ ʙɪɢ ᴍɪsᴛᴀᴋᴇs -> piano glissando, elton john, very dramatic Bᴜᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴍᴀᴋᴇ ᴛʜᴇ ᴡᴏʀsᴛ ᴏɴᴇ ʟᴏᴏᴋ ғɪɴᴇ -> twist a crystal ball that’s dark blue as the protagonist runs away in fear I sʜᴏᴜʟᴅ’ᴠᴇ ᴋɴᴏᴡɴ ɪᴛ ᴡᴀs sᴛʀᴀɴɢᴇ Yᴏᴜ ᴏɴʟʏ ᴄᴏᴍᴇ ᴏᴜᴛ ᴀᴛ ɴɪɢʜᴛ

I ᴜsᴇᴅ ᴛᴏ ᴛʜɪɴᴋ I ᴡᴀs sᴍᴀʀᴛ Bᴜᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴍᴀᴅᴇ ᴍᴇ ʟᴏᴏᴋ sᴏ ɴᴀɪ̈ᴠᴇ Tʜᴇ ᴡᴀʏ ʏᴏᴜ sᴏʟᴅ ᴍᴇ ғᴏʀ ᴘᴀʀᴛs -> sees shadow As ʏᴏᴜ sᴜɴᴋ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴛᴇᴇᴛʜ ɪɴᴛᴏ ᴍᴇ -> shadow

Paramore Oʜ, ʙʟᴏᴏᴅsᴜᴄᴋᴇʀ, ᴅʀᴇᴀᴍ ᴄʀᴜsʜᴇʀ

Avril Lavigne

Bʟᴇᴇᴅɪɴɢ ᴍᴇ ᴅʀʏ ʟɪᴋᴇ ᴀ … ᴠᴀᴍᴘɪʀᴇ

end on cymbals + and a guitar

hmm “play”…. it sounds theatrical, I guess :)

Someone analyze this further please TT hands /\

https://youtu.be/PdTg-JT8FPM is pretty good :) but not complete, more could be said!!!

>hates song

>proceeds to listen to sing for 3 consecutive days

(now 4)

I appreciate the lyricism, it works wonderfully on the stage :) (red curtains emoji)

haha kool-aid is funny

“Lᴏᴏᴋ ᴀᴛ ʏᴏᴜ, ᴄᴏᴏʟ ɢᴜʏ, ʏᴏᴜ ɢᴏᴛ ɪᴛ”

“I ᴜsᴇᴅ ᴛᴏ ᴛʜɪɴᴋ I ᴡᴀs sᴍᴀʀᴛ Bᴜᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴍᴀᴅᴇ ᴍᴇ ʟᴏᴏᴋ sᴏ ɴᴀɪ̈ᴠᴇ”

most of the song is just her being helpless(not really), sad, and most of all confused, but this really proves her innocence, and that she’s a good person, (editor me, clear projection here, if it just wasn't _me_ being naïve, if that wasn't already obvious lol) because maybe they would say the second lines, but they would never say the first line even as a joke if they were not a good person 

mean TT

where’s the 2000’s drums at???

what on earth is rocky horror picture show

ok so the final genre is rock

it makes sense now, and is not in fact repetitive 

paid(editor me, this was an autocorrect of p!atd though I don't think I saw the autocorrect until now ) vibes apparently -reaction video from a video with two people (editor me, I think it was one where they were old white dudes with a purple background who listened to mainly metal, but I could be wrong on this)

playlist is 2000’s indie (editor me, I was researching olivia's inspiration and she said her playlist was this lol or at least the comments did, lol)

its in minor

all of this could have been summed down to “I don’t like the new drummer”.

the parts that aren’t her sound like Selena Gomez :) Like, they could collaborate and it would be neat :)

I guess I don’t like the vocal technique because even if it wasn’t billie’s style I thought it sounded more mellow? idk

Lorde??? I guess, but don’t really see it much beyond the opening/structure of things (editor me, yeah, this was definitely a reaction to a comment and I see it now haha)

Songs that belong on a playlist

Vampire

Better Than Revenge

good 4 u

paid or something paramore???? idk just what was on the radio 

oh, that one similar song, ok

enchanted to meet you

rolling in the deep? idk

mine tv

icona pop “i don’t care” 

taylor swift look what you made me do (on spot/hits the spot/pinpoint accuracy) 

tove lo

katy perry - teenage dream

needs more guitar

"the song was a tissue of threadbare clichés" -google for threadbare (editor me I think I miiiight have read this on a comment on apple iTunes reviews, because I definitely did not know that word before)

nice lol haha totally not this one amirite :) (ominous smile) (you should be concerned) (about me, not you) (thankfully) haha

:D

ok I made a playlist on spotify ✨nuf said ✨💐🪷

this is tearing my soul away :D (never thought this was possible, so this is cool lol)

—the centrol theme is people sobbing in their songs—

also teenagers being teenagers, or at least music targeted towards them

why hate?

-emo

-billie eilith

-teenagers

-almost sampled but not quite

-the way words are pronounced

-straight up the production

-“cool” = cringe? (to adults? lol haha)

-maybe that last point is really it :)

-“look at me I’m important”

-fire this drummer

-also consider help for the producer

-overused, cliche, generic, boring <— this is it for sure, I think

-not enough out of the ordinary/expected

-make it stop pls

-imo the last part is better bc she has more confidence :)

-Olivia Rodrigo Vampire - Creativity Don't Pay Reaction I agree it’s trying too hard and going nowhere

-also on the fact that it appears that she’s trying to be edgy - “The swearing to me seems forced and unnecessary and trying to be edgy.” also see “I'm ancient so not the demographic it's aimed at.” “ I maintain that it's not particularly inspired songwriting or production in my opinion.”? “ it's an unfair comparison,” also true

no hate

-but she’s got a good spirit :)

[shannyh25]

Please let me know what you guys think of this story. I feel like Dora hardly gets written on fan fan fiction and I wanted to poke into Dora’s head and see how she felt about moving to Green Gables and meeting Anne, Marilla, and even Gilbert. Dora has a story she wants to tell and I’m going to try and write this one for her.

Please tell me your thoughts on it and if you have any ideas on what I should put in the story, please feel free to share them!

Thank you!

Summary:

This is Dora Keith's story on the day she moved into Green Gables. Dora is a shy, scared, quite little girl who has been through a lot. What does Dora think of Anne? What does Dora think of Gilbert? What does Dora think of Marilla and Rachel? Anne tires her hardest to get Dora to open up to her. Anne wants to be Dora's friend. Anne wants Dora to have a fun childhood like Anne did growing up at Green Gables and in Avonlea. Will Dora loosen up and learn to be a child again? Anne will help with that.

Work Text:

Author’s note: A special note to my friend Nell Lime for giving me ideas and helping edit my chapter. I am writing a different story this time and it's about Dora’s intake on her arrival of Green Gables and what she thinks of Anne and even GIlbert I feel like Dora doesn’t get enough credit and i thought she has a story that wants to be told, so I am going to write it. I hope you guys enjoy it.

Please check out Nell Lime’s stories as well. She is a fantastic writer. Check out her newest story. Our Own Little Family. Thank you Nell Lime.

Chapter1:

Dora Keith of Green Gables, still remembered that vivid, horrible day back at her old home in East Grafton. She never would forget that day. She didn't think her twin brother Davy would forget it

either. The memory was so real for the both of them to this day.

It was a gray, dull morning when our story started. Dora Keith had gotten up early when the neighbor's rooster started its noise at the crack of dawn. Dora got out of her warm bed she had shared with Davy and slowly and quietly she got herself dressed.

The young doctor that has been staying with the Keith family, Doctor Franklin had fallen asleep in the chair by her mothers beside. He slowly woke up when the old rooster crowed next door and quickly checked Dora's mothers pulse.

Dora couldn't watch, she mumbled that she was going out to gather the few precious eggs the hens had managed to lay for them. Dora went to the little wooden table to grab her basket. She'd grabbed it just as Doctor Franklin got up and knelt down before her so he could be at Dora's eye level. He put a tender, caring hand on Dora's shoulder and her eyes slowly went to look at the ground.

"Please." Dora whimpered. " Please tell me she'll be alright. I- we have no place to go."

Doctor Franklin gently squeezed her shoulder and that's all she needed to know.

"You're a doctor! You're supposed to help people get better! Help Momma get better! You can't let her die. Please don't let her die, Doctor Franklin. I'll sell everything in the house we own to pay you without mommas permission. Please save her." Dora begged.

"Dora. I've done all I could, child. You've got to believe me. I may be fresh out of medical school, but I've done my best. Your momma was the first patient I have had and it's been an honor. I'm sorry sweetheart. I-I don't have anything left to offer her. Her body is too weak." Doctor Franklin tried to tell her.

Shaking her shoulder free, she grabbed her basket to get ready to collect the eggs for breakfast. But, before she left, she took a glance at her twin Davy. He was still sound asleep. He would be up as soon as breakfast was starting to cook. He was always hungry

.

Then she looked at her mother. She was so thin, almost a skeleton. She hasn't eaten in days or even weeks. Dora and even Davy tried to get her to eat. From eggs, to dry toast and soup. Whatever Dora could get her hands on from friends and neighbors.

Her hair had mostly fallen out now and Dora cried when it did. She remembered when she was younger, her mother had long, beautiful, blond hair. Just like Dora's. But that has long been gone. Her hair was just thin and scraggly and ready to fall out even more.

Her mother's face was thin and hollow. Her eyes almost sunken in. Her body was turning a grayish color. Death was slowly eating her mother alive. Dora knew it, so did Davy.

Davy -

Davy was terrified of going near their mother. He wasn't used to seeing her like this. But slowly, he did get used to it and would sometimes crawl on the bed with her and talk about his day with the neighbor kids. What games they played and what they did in town. Keeping his promise, he stayed out of trouble. Then other days, he would sit in the rocking chair looking so defeated, miserable and sad looking, he didn't have the heart to do anything bad the rest of the night.

Dora knew her momma was going to die today. Even in the early morning. Her mother deserved peace by this point. She has been suffering for so long. She was tired. She was ready to go home. Dora knew it.

Dora may be only 6 years old, but when you live in a town like East Grafton, you need to learn to be a grownup quickly. That is what she had to do. Now, she needed to be a grown up and take care of Davy.

Dora bit her lip to keep it from trembling. But it was the tears that gave it away. Dora put the basket back down that she was going to use to collect the eggs.

"Should I wake Davy?" Dora asked.

Doctor Franklin nodded his head yes.

Dora went over to the bed that she and Davy shared. Davy was still sleeping. Dora gently shook his shoulder and turned around to look at her with his sleepy eyes.

"Dora?" Davy mumbles.

"It's Momma, Davy. We-we need to say our goodbyes now. Doctor Franklin thinks we don't have much time left with Momma. Less than an hour." Dora said softly.

Davy gave a soft whimper, and he slowly got out of bed. Dora puts her hand out so Davy can hold it. She knew he was going to need her support. Davy took her little hand and together they both walked towards their mothers bedside to say goodbye.

————————

Dora and Davy quietly and slowly walked up to their mothers bedside. Dora sat down in the old rocking chair that Doctor Franklin usually sits in. Dora took her mothers frail, tired, worn hand into her own and brought her hand up to her cheek.

Sniffing a little bit, Dora said, "I promise to look after Davy and do my best to try and keep him out of trouble Momma. I'll try my best to have us not be separated and kept together. You have been a good Momma. Thank you for always taking care of us before you got sick. I love you Momma. You deserve peace and free of pain. Rest peacefully Momma. I love you."

Dora wasn't sure if her mother even heard a word she said. Dora took a peek at her mother. Her mother looked almost soulless. It shocked Dora to the core. She never had seen anyone like this. She has seen her mother fading this since she was sick yes, but she had always been afraid to truly look at her. She figured she would take a quick glance at her now before it was too late. Dora almost regretted it. She quickly gave her mother a little kiss on the cheek and then she went over to Davy.

Davy sat down in the chair just like Dora did and gently took his mothers hand. He was sniffing quietly trying not to be heard. He was trying to be the "man of the house."

"I'm sorry you got sick Momma. You have been a good momma. I'm going to miss you telling us stories and tucking us in at bedtime. I promise to keep Dora safe and make sure she will be taken care of. Goodbye Momma. Have a good sleep." Davy mumbled.

Dora saw the look of surprise on Davy's face as their mother squeezed his hand ever so slightly, before going limp in his hand. Davy peeked over to Dora waiting for a nod before leaning over to quickly give his mother a tender kiss on her cheek. Then he lifted himself up, and ran over to Dora to be with her. He wrapped his little arms around her, and together they sat on the bed.

————————

Dora felt like she had been waiting for a long time. She felt like she should be making breakfast or getting Davy dressed for the day. But instead, she and Davy were waiting with Doctor Franklin.

Doctor Franklin sat with the twins as they waited. He kept checking their mother's pulse, listening to her heart and lungs between glancing at the small clock they kept on the mantle. He'd tried to make small talk, sharing about what he'd liked so far since graduating and coming to help his mother's brother with his practice there in East Grafton. How he had a girl in Charlottetown he meant to marry. He'd let them listen to her heart beat, it grew weaker and weaker each time.

Davy was starting to get antsy at just sitting and waiting. He was dressed by this point and so was Dora. Dora had Davy go play with some blocks and his train set quietly in the corner. Davy didn't need to be told twice. It gave him something to do.

Dora got out her sewing project she was working on. Her apron had a big hole in it. Dora was outside one day in the little yard they had. There was a rose bush and her apron got caught in it. A big hole was made and she was heartbroken. That was her best apron and she couldn't afford another one. She asked her neighbor Mrs. Janie if she could help her get started on it.

That was a few weeks ago and Dora hasn't spent much time on her apron as she has hoped. She had been too busy. But, she got out her apron and little sewing kit and started to work on it.

Dora wasn't sure how long she had been working on her apron. A half hour, hour? But she was making some progress on it and Davy was being good at playing with his toys in the corner.

Dora was about to make another stitch in her apron when Doctor Franklin came up to her. She looked startled because she was concentrating so hard on her work, she didn't see or hear him approach her.

Davy noticed Doctor Franklin come up to Dora too and he quickly ran over to her. He sat on the bed with Dora and clutched her hand.

"I'm so sorry children, your mother passed away."

Dora turned pale and felt sick to her stomach. Davy let out a shriek and took off running outside.

Dora didn’t try to stop him. She looked at Doctor Franklin. “ Davy and I are orphans now, We have no family, no one to take us in. It's your fault Doctor Franklin. It's your fault if Davy and I are split up.”

Dora’s cold words hurt Doctor Franklin. Surprised him. At the moment, he didn’t have time to deal with his own feelings. He had the children to deal with. He knelt down to be at Dora’s level and placed a hand on her shoulder.

“ That's what I wanted to tell you, Dora. You and Davy won't be split up. I took the matters into my own hands and wrote to a relative, you and Davy. A woman named Marilla Cuthbert. She adopted a girl herself and has raised her. Marilla and the young women that she adopted will help raise you and Davy. She is a well respected woman from where she comes from. You and Davy won't have to be split child. Marilla and her adopted daughter will be here this afternoon, with her adopted daughter's friend. A young man. You don’t have to worry about being taken away from more little one. You and Davy will be safe.” Doctor Franklin said.

Dora felt her legs collapse underneath her.

[lordgolden]

if i get one more email about l*w sch**l or a new l*w r*v**w assignment i will lose it 

[mllekurtz]

14 and/or 22 for the weird writer asks meme! <3

14. Do you lend your books to people? Are people scared to borrow books from you? Do you know exactly where all your “lost” books are and which specific friend from school you haven’t seen in twelve years still possesses them? Will you ever get them back? I do lend my books to people! I do it much more infrequently now that 1) most of my friends are online and 2) I usually buy ebooks instead of physical books. I used to enthusiastically drop books in people's laps because I love to share the things I'm excited about, and yeah, I had a list of all the people I gave my books to when it became hard to keep all the loans straight in my head.

I like to think I have a healthy relationship with physical books. I've never truly venerated the book as an object (yeah, I'm an amateur bookbinder, but appreciation is not the same as worship), and working in publishing put the final nail in the coffin of my being precious about paper and ink. After all, you put all your efforts in the words themselves, and holding the bound object is just the last part of a long process. With all the due exceptions, as long as they're not out of print or ridiculously expensive, books can be replaced. The story is what's important, the reader is what's important; I'd rather never see a beloved book again than keeping a friend to enjoy a story I love.

22. How organized are you with your writing? Describe to me your organization method, if it exists. What tools do you use? Notebooks? Binders? Apps? The Cloud?

(this got long so it's under a cut!)

Story ideas usually live in the hivemind, aka discord chats or servers. Once an idea develops and starts to turn into a proper outline, I create a channel for it in my private discord server where I can chuck ideas on my phone when I wake up at 2 am. Once the fic is done, I move the channel into the graveyard.

This is what the graveyard looks like btw (not all of it):

(If you're wandering what is essek-thoughts, I was too, so I checked: they're notes on a better man than me. idk-shadowgast is the early stages of all this science i don't understand)

I keep using discord even when I start working on the fic properly in Google Docs; all the random thoughts I have when I don't have access to GDocs go there, as well as most of the darlings I kill while editing. (I also download copies of my docs in my hard drive very often, because 1) I was born in the '90s and I don't trust the cloud 2) you never know when you'll need to go back in time and search through an old version of your work.)

I usually break down the fic into scenes and/or chapters, depending on its length; I use various headings to make an organised outline in the sidebar. I've also started using the summary function to write notes to myself (future developments, changes I need to track, the tags that I add as I go, things I need to remember to say in the A/N and so on).

This is what my outline for the emergency contact au looks like right now:

It's not very detailed because the structure is very straightforward and the chapters are short, but I would usually have nesting headlines so I can keep track of scenes I need to go back to, flashbacks and so on. The days of the week are a necessity because I often have to refer to something that happened "three days ago" and I wouldn't remember when that would have been. I also need to remember that offices are usually closed on a Sunday, and so on.

I also often leave comments to myself and/or my betas throughout to highlight the parts that need attention. And this is it, I think? It might sound convoluted but it's actually a very straightforward process that keeps me from messing up and forgetting ideas.

[chim-chimchii]

Encaptured (Jungkook)

Genre: Fluff 

Note: A little fuckboy Jungkook for you all! I’m currently working on a social media au and I might just post the profiles so I can give you guys a sneak peek and to also motivate myself to work on it more! Let me know what you guys think! I also didn’t know how to end this so I apologize if it’s a crappy ending. 

. . . . . . . 

On Thursdays, the literary class met in the college library, and that was when Jungkook always had you look over his essays. Not only did he use that time to get his papers edited, but he also took this time to prod you about your weekend plans.

"So, are you going to accept my offer to take you to the movies this weekend?" Jungkook asked, resting his chin on his palm.

You glanced up from his essay. "Hm, not this week. I think I'm all booked." With a smirk directed towards him, you continued marking his paper.

"You said that last week." He mumbled with a playful pout.

"And last week, when I rejected you, you ended up taking that girl from your math class." You stated with a challenging stare.

Tongue in cheek, Jungkook chuckled, "Well, I couldn't let those tickets go to waste! I thought for sure you would have agreed." He continued trying to justify his playboy ways.

You scoffed and slid his paper over to him; red pen marks were scattered all over it. You thought that the edits you made to his essay would distract him from the current topic, but he pushed the assignment to the side.

"Y/n, when will you let me take you on a date?" Jungkook leaned in ever so slightly and smiled sweetly.

Your heart rate increased. His whole appearance changed with that one smile, and it was hard for you to hide the fact that it made you feel some way. Maybe it was time to give him a chance, and if it didn't work out, then he would finally stop bugging you.

"Okay." You finally answered after thinking it through. That one word took Jungkook by surprise.

"Okay? Are you saying, yes?"

Without making eye contact, you nodded and closed your notebook with a gentle smile.

"I'll pick you up at seven." Jungkook bit his lip to hide his smile and watched you leave the library.

. . . . 

The sun was setting, and seven o clock was right around the corner. You gave yourself one last look in the mirror that hung by the door and nodded in approval of your outfit. You tried to remember the last time you got all dressed up for a date, and as you tried to place a moment, there was a knock at the door. 

As you reached for the door, you hesitated. What if this was a one-time thing? What if he never spoke to you after tonight? Just because you turned his offers for a date down multiple times, it wasn't as if you didn't like Jungkook. You appreciated his presence in your boring literary class; you appreciated his jokes and stories. What if all he wanted was to add you to the list of girls he won over with his charms? 

Your thoughts were interrupted again by a knock, but this time it was a lot softer. You took a deep breath and twisted the doorknob. Whatever his intentions were, you decided to accept this date, so you had to deal with the consequences. 

Jungkook stood in the doorway with his hands buried in his pockets. His head was hung low as if he was half expecting you not to answer, but when you opened the door wider, he looked up. 

You forgot to breathe upon seeing him. Instead of the cliche leather jacket he always wore, he wore a grey flannel over a white shirt. It wasn't THAT different from what he always wore but seeing him wear light-colored clothing suits him well. His demeanor was different, as well. A timid smile replaced the cocky smirk he always had on his face. 

"Are you ready?" His voice came out lighter than usual; it took you a moment to remember this was Jungkook and not someone else. 

"Yeah, let me just grab my bad." You left him by the door as you dashed back to your room to grab your purse. 

. . . . 

It was the little things that Jungkook did that made you weak in the knees. As the two of you walked to the theater, Jungkook rested his hand on the small of your back. He maneuvered you to the other side of him; it wasn't until his warmth left that you realized he was making sure you were closest to the buildings and away from the busy street.

Your eyes fixated on him, and it felt like the world was in slow motion, and you saw Junkook in a new light. You wanted nothing more, but to have this moment last forever. Forever didn't come because he glanced at you with that beautiful smile of his.

"Would you be upset if I told you I don't want to go to the movies anymore?"

The world resumed at its original speed, and your excitement disappeared.

"Oh? Did you want to take a rain check or something?" You tried not to sound too disappointed.

"No, no. I just don't think I can handle sitting next to you for two and a half hours and not talk to you."

You sighed in relief, which made Jungkook chuckle.

"I don't know what you've been told or what you heard about me, but I'm not cruel.

You raised your eyebrow at him and smirked. "I don't know, I've heard some pretty interesting things about you, Jungkook."

You gave him one last teasing look before walking ahead of him. Jungkook tsked before jogging to catch up to you.

"So, are you going to tell me what you heard so I can prove those accusations wrong?"

Together you waded through the crowded street, careful not to lost one another. If he took your hand, would you pull away or let him have that small victory?

"You haven't said what we're going to do now that we're not going to the movies."

His hand grazed yours. "You're changing the topic."

Seconds later, his hand rested on your shoulder to guide you towards the entrance of an arcade. It was full of other couples, groups of friends, and people wanting to have fun. The atmosphere brought a smile to your face. You didn't even realize Jungkook had left until he returned with a bag full of tokens.

"I'll let you choose the first game."

Dramatically, you rested your hand on your heart. "What a gentleman."

Jungkook threw his head back in defeat. "Whoever told you that I wasn't a gentleman needs to stop feeding you lies."

"I'm sorry to tell you this, but you don't really have the best reputation." You explained as you made your way over to the basketball game.

You glanced back at him to make sure he was following and found him chewing on his lip. Your statement bothered him. The two of you exchanged no other words until he was standing next to you.

"Is that why you always rejected me?" His eyes locked with yours, and you didn't dare look away.

Rather than lying, you nodded. "Yeah."

Jungkook was the one to break eye contact; it was clear he was upset. He fished for a token and inserted it into the machine to start the game.

As you watched him, you inhaled deeply and thought about everything. You didn't want to be the reason the date ended in ruins. You were honest about why you declined his offers, but now that you were here with him, you kept thinking how different things could have been if you had just agreed to date him the first time he asked.

Without thinking further, when Jungkook reached for another ball, you took it from him and aimed for the moving hoop.

"You can't blame me for being scared."

Jungkook opened his mouth to say something but stopped as he watched you throw the ball straight into the hoop. Another ball rolled towards you, but Jungkook grabbed it before you could.

"I wasn't blaming you. I was blaming myself." He missed the hoop and ticked his head to the side, slightly annoyed that he didn't score, but as the game ended, he had one of the highest scores.

Together you moved in the direction of another game.

"Why are you blaming yourself?"

He didn't say anything, and you were afraid he didn't hear you due to the increasing volume of everyone around you.

"Because I got careless with relationships and dating, and now that I want something serious, my reputation is ruining my chances.

The corners of your mouth twitched into a tiny smile. "It's your turn to pick a game."

You weren't ignoring what he had said; you just wanted to think about it for a moment longer.

The two of you wandered around the arcade and tried not to lose each other with the growing amount of people entering the building. Jungkook stopped in front of a photo booth and let out a small laugh.

"It isn't a game, but it seems like this is the only thing unoccupied." 

"I think it'll be fun!" You linked his arm with yours and entered the small booth. 

Jungkook sat silently next to you as you messed around with the photo settings. As you sat back, your shoulder brushed against his, and it made it obvious how close the two of you were. You couldn't help but think back to his previous comment about wanting to be in a serious relationship.  Did he mean that he wanted to try and be in a serious relationship with you? You'd be lying if you said you didn't have feelings for him. The truth was, you had liked him all along, but you let the rumors about him cloud your judgment of his character. 

The beeping of the timer caused you to snap out of your thoughts. 

"Are you ready?" You glanced over at Jungkook, and to your surprise, he was already staring at you. The flash went off, signaling that the first picture was taken. Then the timer reset. 

"Your chances aren't completely ruined, by the way." 

The two of you looked away and to the camera, where you opted for a funny face. The camera went off. 

"What do you mean?" Jungkook turned to you again. 

"If you were this version of yourself all the time, you wouldn't have any trouble getting into a serious relationship, and any girl would be happy to be with you."  

You stuck your tongue out at him as the camera snapped another picture. 

"I don't want just any girl though--" He faced forward and held up a peace sign. "--I want you." 

Your expression changed in an instant, and it was captured as the shutter sounded. "Jungkook." 

He hesitated but looked your way as the last seconds of the timer counted down. You took his face into your hands and pressed your lips to his. The moment captured forever as the final flash of the camera washed over the two of you. 

[knockknockchicagopd]

❛ THE GOOD DOCTOR ❜

❚❙ SUMMARY: Ask your father to not worry about you, if you dare.

❚❙ CHRISTOPHER HERRMANN MASTERLIST.

❚❙ WORDS: about 750.

❚❙ A/N: I have strong daddy feels for Chris since ever, and this short idea came to me on one of those kinds of days where I need a hug. I just hope you enjoy this fluffy moment. Daughter!reader. This writing hasn’t been edited, you may find some grammar mistakes, I’m sorry about that. If you find a description about body or a word out of place, or something that makes you feel uncomfortable / unrepresented, let me know by a private message and I will change it delighted.

❚❙ GIF credits: to @chicagofireadventures.

❚❙ General tag list: @melblacc @rebelwrites @skyofficialxx @sesamepancakes @scarletsoldierrr @mondefantastique @that-chick212 @enbyamaro @inlovewith3 @ocetevasgirl @destynelseclipsa @miahelen @jadakiss13 @mcgreads @graniairish @teller258316 @i-love-scott-mccall @tclaerh. If you wanna be added to my tag list, send me a message!

“Watcha' doin', kid?”

You can't help but jump slightly on your seat when your father's high-pitched voice interrupts your concentration, not expecting a visit from him in the Chicago Medical library. With a hand on your chest trying to calm yourself, you turn at him, frowning somewhat upset. He sits on the nearest chair shrugging his shoulders and drawing a guilty grimace because of the scare.

“Something happened? Is everyone okay?” You ask confused, lowering the screen of your laptop, until you notice the plastic bag hanging from his right hand.

“This is what you do now, uh? Lie to me? To your dad?”

“I didn't li—”.

“Not again, kiddo. Maggie called me. She said everything you ate today was two bags of chips and a chocolate bar!” Shaking his head as he snorts and rubs the bridge of his nose, your father places the bag on an empty space over the desk. “I understand you have too much to study, that you're on the final exams period, but… how are you gonna be a good doctor, if you don't know the importance of food?”

“Dad, I really have zero time to lose it in the cafeteria or cooking”.

“Mom can cook for you! I can do it too! I can send the candidate with what we prepare in the firehouse, or anything with Uber eats! You have no excuses”.

As your father points out every option trying to not raise his tone of voice, you can feel the bothering growing inside him. You can't be contrary to what he's saying because he's right; you have been so focused on your exams that you haven't taken care of what you eat. You understand he is worried for you, that's why you don't say a single word when he puts your laptop and notes away to empty the bag on the desk. A tupper with pasta and chicken salad, a banana, an energy bar with chocolate chips, a small bag of almonds, and an orange juice. 

Even if you wouldn't be hungry, you would be seeing this dinner right in front of your eyes. You can't hide the adoring grim that, inevitably, is drawn in your face. Watching him opening the container and spearing some pasta with a fork, you tilt your head with curiosity.

“I'm not leaving till you eat it all. So… do it by yourself or I'll treat you like the kid you are still”.

It doesn't matter how old you are, nor if you don't live in his house anymore, nor if you are an independent woman; you will be his little girl forever. He can't be a day without hearing your voice, without checking if you need something, without seeing you. Parents don't have a favorite child, but you are his. Every time you remember how much he cried when you told him about renting a flat with your best friend, you cry too. 

Without a fuss, you grab the fork to bring it to your mouth and start eating. And as you are finishing the dish he has prepared for you, your father looks more relaxed and less preoccupied. He also looks satisfied because he's aware of the amazing cooker he is and how much you enjoy it. Because, yes, it's a pasta salad; but you need to find the perfect boiling time and obtain the perfect texture. He also knows how you like chicken, roast in its juice, and seasoned with a little rosemary. Then, he mixed both ingredients with tomato diced, corn, and some olive oil.

“Thank you, dad”. You sigh feeling your stomach full to the limits, cleaning your lips with a napkin. “I… really needed it”.

“Bet you study better now”.

“I'm sure”.

“Okay, gotta go back to the firehouse. I'll call you in a few hours to don't fall asleep and be on time for your exam”. Leaning on his chair, your father places a hand on your neck to leave a kiss on your forehead. 

“I love you, dad”.

“And I love you, my little girl. I know sometimes I worry too much, but it's only because I want the best for you”.

“I know… I'd never change that from you”.

You watch him leaving the library, taking a sip from the juice he has prepared for you before continuing studying. Without any doubt, your father is the best in the world.

[julyarchives]

Tendae (텐데) || (M) Teach Me pt.4

You realized that Wooseok is the one person that can bring you comfort whenever you two are together, and the holiday spent alone with him only intensified the tingly feeling inside that scares you so much.

→ Pairing: Wooseok x Reader

→ Genre: Smut

→ Words:  4.5K

→ Contains: Smut; Friends To Lovers; Virgin!Wooseok; fingering; there is a small anxiety attack at the beginning; lots of touches; conflicted feelings

→ A/n: So, this chapter incorporates 2 requests that have been recently sent to us, thank you so much to the people who've done it, it was really nice to imagine Wooseok in these situations and turns out we are a sucker for him (can you blame us tho?). Anyway, we hope you guys like it! (Also, yes, the title is inspired by Bobby's song, because that has GOT to be their theme song, it's perfect)

→ Index: Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4

You tried to sleep, really. You put on some calming music and the tv was on to keep the room dim light but it was no use. Tossing and turning in bed was something that became a habit after you had to deal with your life choices. You got yourself in a really tiring situation, between babysitting your best friends and dealing with two simultaneous educational courses, you barely had time alone to just relax. To make it worse, the rain started to pour heavily outside and you sighed, it was only a matter of time for the nightmare to begin. Sometimes even you forgot how scared you were of thunder and storms, they didn't occur often and when it rained, it was light but you just knew that an anxiety attack was on the way when the first loud thunder resonated. Covering your head with the blanket, you sank into the mattress and wished for it to go away. There was only so much you could deal with by sighing and wishing for the best. The noises got louder and the light music was no longer catching your ears, tears now threatening to fall and your fear only growing bigger. It seemed like a couple of minutes went by you figured, even though it felt like hours to you and there was no sign of the storm stopping. A somehow even louder bang caught your attention and you jumped, how the hell did it thunder inside your room?

"Y/N?", a desperate whisper was heard by the door and you cautiously peeked from under the covers. Wooseok was standing by the door with a pillow under his arm and his hand holding his chest as if to catch his breath. "I was asleep, the thunder woke me up. Sorry it took me so long to come", he said, still whispering, maybe to not scare you even more.

You nodded without being able to speak, you just knew the tears would fall if you tried. Wooseok closed the door behind him and even jumped lightly when another thunder filled the room. That spurred him on, quickly moving to gently pry the blanket from your head and you scooted over, making room for him, only to have him settle quickly with his own pillow and pull the covers back up, covering both of your heads. He smiled sweetly at you and opened his arms in invitation, one which you gladly accepted. The moment your head was against his chest you cried, feeling protected like this after the overwhelmed fear you felt so strongly was too much and you felt Wooseok hugging you stronger. Your small sobs were barely audible because of the thunder but you knew he felt how your body moved as you cried and you were thankful he just hugged you in silence. You heard him hum to some tune and you wondered if he could hear the music you had put to sleep.

"Y/N?", Wooseok called you and you moved your head back to look at his face, "are you still crying?", as he asked it, you let out a sniff, making you both chuckle.

"Does that answer you?", your voice wasn't sounding normal and even then you knew it was okay because he understood it.

"I remember when I didn't get much screen time at a tv show and you found me crying in my room…".

You remembered that. It was at the beginning of the friendship, he was reserved and shy but when they guys showed up looking awkward and Wooseok just walked past everyone, you had to follow him. He was under the covers and you heard the small whimpers of crying and you didn't think twice, your instinct told you to slip into the mattress with him, you laid down to watch a wide-eyed Wooseok who was sniffing and trying to control his crying. You understood how he must have felt, not good enough because the editing and the hosts ignored him almost completely. You needed to show him he was so much more than that but he was too reserved for you to know what to do, so you just held him and he quickly hid his face in your neck and cried until he fell asleep. Since that you always shared a bed and got so much closer.

"I remember that too", you said, your crying slowing down. "I'm glad you let me stay that day". He sighed, holding you closer.

"I'm glad too". He shyly kissed the top of your head and went back to humming a song. Paying attention to the vibration of his chest and his warmth, you soon fell asleep even as it still poured outside.

Waking up was the hardest part since it was a while that you slept so well. Moving a bit you noticed that the blanket was no longer covering your head but Wooseok was still next to you, hand-holding close by the waist. He was soundly asleep and you sighed, torn between wanting to stay with him and needing to start your day. The struggle didn't last long as you needed to go to the bathroom, so you wiggled a bit so he could let go of you but you ended up being pulled closer against him, his hand possessive around you. He groaned in his sleep, displeased that you were moving and you chuckled silently, now taking his hand in yours to move it away from you. For a second you let your fingers intertwine and you smiled, a warmth you knew all too well invading your chest but as always, you decided to ignore it and move away.

The house was abnormally quiet and you did your morning hygiene quickly and surprisingly in peace. After choosing a comfortable slip-on dress, you got into the kitchen which was also weirdly empty. Usually, at least one person was rummaging around for snacks and you made sure to look around to search for any of the boys. As you made your favorite breakfast food and drink, you noticed the fridge covered in small notes in all different colors and shapes, each of them from one of the boys letting you and Wooseok know that they'd be out. Some would be traveling since it was a holiday, others would be visiting their families and you frowned, you didn't even know it was a holiday, studies were taking up most of your time and all you knew was your deadlines. Opening the group chat for the house, that featured all the boys, you typed a quick text wishing them a good holiday break and resumed eating.

After finishing, you slightly debated if you should go to your own home to study but with a sigh and a shy amused smile, you got up and went to the empty room they reserved for you so you grab your notebook. The boys going to the army was something not very pleasant but at least you got a bed and a room to yourself, lucky two of them went almost together.

You got inside quietly and tiptoed around the bed so as to not wake up the giant asleep on the bed, his feet almost completely out of it. Your backpack was at reach and you took it with you as silent as you could. With your back turned to the bed, you made sure to look twice to see if you forgot anything.

"Tell me you made breakfast", a raspy sleepy voice resonated behind you. You jumped and your backpack almost flew away from your hands.

"Don't do that, Wooseok! Warn me before talking!", he laughed at that, arm resting on his face.

"Sure, I'll squeak before talking so you don't get scared", he was fully laughing and you watched him fondly.

"Shut up", you slightly pouted and he sat upon the bed, moving so you could almost stand between his knees. "There is breakfast but I should eat it myself for that".

"I just woke up, Y/N. Give me a break", he smiled and gosh, wasn't he charming, hair all messy, voice deep from sleep, made you remember all the times you two shared touches, your cheeks feeling warm.

As if sensing where your mind was going, Wooseok slowly moved his arms and placed his hands on your waist, barely touching it. Your first answer was to drop the backpack and place your hands on his shoulders, moving closer. When he stretched his upper body, your body knew what to do before you even registered the action. You moved lower and your foreheads touched, such an intimate touch and yet so innocent. Both of you whispered good morning shyly and like waking up from a dream you almost flinched away, grabbing your things from the floor and clearing your throat.

"There's food ready. I'm gonna study, alright?", he nodded a bit stunned by your sudden change. "Everyone is away and it's just the two of us today", and with that, you walked away.

The morning went by without a single problem, you focused on your studies while Wooseok watched something with headphones or just played on his phone. Your only breaks were bathroom breaks and you were almost certain that you wouldn't even drink water if Wooseok didn't leave a bottle there every half hour.

Lunchtime came and you got up your chair to stretch and rummage through your phone, sitting next to Wooseok. Part of you noticed how there was a full empty large couch and two chairs available but you still sat on the two-seat couch thigh to thigh with him. You shook your head physically to get rid of these thoughts and quickly opened the food delivery app, nudging Wooseok to check it with you.

It wasn't a hard task to decide on lunch since you two knew what you liked and soon enough the food arrived. The small chit-chat was alien even to you and part of you knew that it was because you fled his embrace earlier. That scared you because even though you started whatever you two have it shouldn't be affecting you this much. Of course, he was your best friend and you knew everything about each other, and yeah, knowing a girl at work was coming onto Wooseok was bothering you and staying alone with him like this made you nervous like never before but hey, if you ran away it'd go away sometime, right?

After eating, Wooseok took care of the dishes and you laid on the big couch, closing your eyes for a moment to at least pretend everything was normal. After a few minutes of you being completely still, you felt a presence in the room and then the external lights went missing and the dark of your closed eyes got even darker. You opened one eye and fought back a smile to see Wooseok standing and looming over you curiously.

"What", you breathed out.

"Checking if you didn't die", he seemed serious and that made you crack, sitting up while laughing hard after he stepped back and he sat next to you, his arm going to your shoulder like it was natural. Did you two always do stuff like that? You weren't even sure but you let yourself enjoy the moment for a bit before going back to reality. "Seriously, you looked dead".

"That was my soul you were seeing", you smiled at his horrified face and you held it with both hands. "I'm joking, silly. I'm just too tired". Without thinking straight, the impulse to feel the moment was too strong and you left a peck on his mouth, quick and yet it made a small sound. "Gonna go study", you rushed over your words, getting up like a lightning bolt and running to the table. If you looked back, you could see a blush spreading on his face, him watching you, face torn between amusement and shock.

It wasn't before three hours went by that Wooseok showed up at the table you were studying on and threw a bag of chips on it.

"Not hungry", you mumbled, a very important part of the analysis you were writing was being refined and you were so close to finishing it that you barely looked up.

The sound of the chair next to you being pulled didn't bother you, neither did the sound of a bag being open. Somehow not even Wooseok sloppily placing a chip on your mouth didn't bother you either. What did bother you was his face showing up between you and the computer screen.

"Move!", you said rather loudly. He didn't answer and moved, thankfully. Some minutes went by and the chips kept coming for which you were thankful.

As you finished writing and started proofreading what you wrote, you felt the ghost of a hand touching your thigh. You frowned and looked at him, who was casually scrolling on his phone with the hand that was away from you, even though you noticed his cheeks being red. You took a deep breath and resumed reading, only to have your thigh gently squeezed by him.

"What are you doing?", you said through your teeth. Since when does he have the nerve to touch you like that?

"I'm checking my phone", he showed you his phone, looking at you as if you were crazy and his actions were obvious.

"Wooseok, I'm busy right now".

"Oh, I know, Y/N". The hand squeezed harder and you shuddered. Shit.

You decided to see how far he could take this and honestly how far could you rest it, so you just ignored it once again. Your mind was on the verge of shutting down but you were almost finishing so you pushed forward. All the time you read, his hand went further on your thigh, reaching your pelvis but not really touching you. It was driving you mad and the way he pretended he did nothing was somehow attractive.

When you finished reading and started closing the software, his hand got braver and touched you through your panties, rubbing lightly, long fingers teasing the extension of it. The tension of his hand on you this whole time was taking all your attention and you bit your lip to not smile as you closed everything. Truth is, there was no way you could focus on anything other than Wooseok with his hand on you like that and you knew how shy he was, so you read your work as sloppy as you could, not paying attention at all, just to make him stay a bit longer.

Your back fell on the chair and you groaned, his finger insistently massaging your clit through the panties. You looked at him then, his phone forgotten on the table, his other hand gripping his pants' leg enough to turn the knuckles white. His eyes were trained on you, his mouth slightly parted and breathing irregular. He looked as affected as you were and you were the one being touched, you reached to his nape and caressed the hair gently, hoping to get to him how grateful you were for him.

The action spurred him on, his hand moving to touch you inside the panties and that got you surprised. You'd be lying if you didn't think he never looked hotter than now, the hand caressing his locks now gripping it. He groaned when he felt how wet you already were for him and moved his hand harder on your clit, getting small whimpers from you. Your hips moved on their own accord, his other hand now touching himself above the pants and you noticed.

You snapped when he flicked your clit perfectly as he gripped his member and hissed, the stimulation being too much for you. Moving fast, you got his hand away from you and straddled Wooseok fast enough to surprise him. Luckily he caught on quickly and held you, hands firm on your ass. You kissed him with fervor, hands making a mess of his hair and it almost seemed like no matter how close you were it wasn't close enough.

You moved your hips almost too desperately and he matched your rhythm, giving as good as he got and you moaned, the whole thing too hot. All the times you two had together flashed through your mind and it only spurred you further, lust overpowering anything else.

"Y/N", he whimpered as you moved just right on top of him, his hips stuttering. "We can't do this here", he panted out.

You stopped and looked at him. His eyes were dark and he was out of breath, his hands never once relenting his grip on you, his hair was a mess and his lips were red and plump from kissing. The pang on your heart almost made you back out, get up and leave but his face was watching adoringly, also lust-driven, and he started leaving small kisses on your neck. You knew you lost the fight.

"Since when you know how to be so bold?", you chuckled and he followed, the humming feeling good on your skin.

"You taught me", was his simple answer, kissing your mouth gently. "We can go to my room if you want or we can go where you're sleeping".

"Your room. It'd be too weird to do this in Jinho's and Hui's room, right?", you smiled and he answered in kind, helping you get up at once and holding your hand during the walk upstairs.

You were very nervous out of a sudden and you didn't even know why. It wasn't your first time with anyone and you knew what you were doing. You taught him after all. But when you felt his hand slightly shake when you reached the room it finally dawned on you. If things went where you felt they would, it would be the first time with him. It would be his first time when it came to actual sex.

Wooseok opened the door and waited for you to enter so he could close and lock it behind you. Even though you were alone in the house, you knew it was better to be safe than sorry here. As you expected, he was nervous and stood there looking at you with his hands on his sides. You smiled fondly, your heart taking leaps on your chest and you touched his face gently.

"It's okay. It's just me". He smiled, kissing you slowly, savoring the moment just like you were. "We don't need to do anything else, reall-"

"I want it", he cut you off eagerly. Then he laughed shyly and gave you a peck. "If you want to, that is".

"Of course I do", you felt a sudden calm wash over you, and that made sense. Not knowing where stood and now having sure he wanted this as much as you made you feel better.

You took a step back and took your dress off, leaving you in your undergarments. He did the same seconds later, standing there in his underwear. Holding his hand, you took you both to his bed and since it was a tight fit, you laid him down and sat on top of him, gently laying down to kiss him and moved with it. That seemed to ease him into it again, this was something you did before and he excitedly followed, rubbing his hard member on your clothed core.

The moans coming out of your mouth were needier than you intended but your body needed him badly and you knew he was the same. You didn't waste time getting up and losing the rest of your clothes, staying naked in front of him. You fought your own shyness back as he stood again and took off his underwear. Wooseok stared at you for a second and then smiled, kissing you tenderly and laying back on the bed. You followed and laid next to him, touching him just like the first time, him nervously watching you only this time was during broad daylight and he was more confident, his own hands traveling across your body, feeling your breasts, your stomach, your arms, everywhere he could reach.

"Do you have any condom?", you whispered.

"Yeah, top drawer". Honestly, you didn't know what answer you expected but you raised your eyebrow at him as you got up to get it.

"Can I ask?", you said coming back.

"One of the guys gave it to me when a girl at work invited me out", Wooseok answered shyly, barely looking at you.

You scoffed and straddled him, letting his cock fit on your slick slit and you moved lightly.

"Too bad you'll be using it with me, isn't it?", you said with more intensity than you expected. "I heard about this girl before", you kissed his neck teasingly, he could stare at you and hold onto your waist. "What was she thinking? That she could take you away from me?", jealousy waking over, and even you were surprised. The first time you heard about the girl you got mad but apparently it was bottled up so nicely inside you that you only noticed now.

"N-no", he stuttered as you bit his neck, hips never stopping its movement. "I kept it because I wanted to use it with you". You stopped. Did he want to do this with you? Wooseok was hoping to get you alone and go all the way with you. It was different hearing it directly from him and you were stunned. He saw it and smiled, it was his turn to kiss you, his upper body more sat up than laying down. His hand caressed your cheek and he looked deeply into your eyes. "I want you".

You could have sworn time froze and your heart stopped. He was staring so intently at you that you felt frozen, only remembering to answer when he changed from intense to doubtful and you were quick to kiss him and hoped that the kiss would tell him everything you couldn't. After you came up for air, you quickly sat next to him and put the condom on for him, which he watched attentively.

"I want you on top of me", you said in a small voice. After all you said, somehow you felt pliant, needing his proximity to deal with it.

Wooseok obliged and you quickly adjusted on his bed, his frame towering over you. Your hands were on his face, thumbs caressing it gently while he supported himself in one hand and aligned himself with the other. You nodded when he faltered, waiting for your approval. As he entered you, two things were registered by your lust hazed brain. The first one was how deliciously he stretched you, you enjoyed his dick before but now you just knew you were doomed. The second one was how lost in pleasure he already looked when he got inside inch by inch. He was dragging the movement to get inside, going slowly and you didn't think it was for you. His mouth was open and a long groan escaped him.

He looked at you a bit desperate, needing to move as quickly as you'd let him and you almost chuckled. You settled for a smile and moved your hips up, indicating he could move. He started slow, going almost completely out before thrusting inside hard. His pace was driving you mad, hands now roaming on his back while his face was buried on your chest, kissing and licking his way all over it.

You endured it as much as you could because it was so good and he seemed so lost in pleasure but it got unbearable and with a hushed "please go faster" you pleaded. Usually, you were vocal during sex but somehow you were so lost in pleasure and in feeling his body all over yours, his cock moving so perfectly inside that you seemed lost for words. Wooseok quickly changed his pace with a grunt and his noises started to come out. Your mouth was open while you tried to keep your eyes open as well but failed many times. You could see he was trying the same but more often than not he got lost in your chest or closed his eyes in pleasure.

You knew neither of you would be able to last longer and it felt like heaven to feel him getting closer to his orgasm with you, his body moving fast and him gripping the sheets while he supported himself on his upper arms. You were sure his back had a few scratches because it was just too good to know you were marking him, his noises while you did that didn't help at all. Wooseok didn't need to say anything to you. Neither you did to him, you were in sync even then and he gave you space to touch your clit, which you gladly did. He tried to warn you but he couldn't, he came with a shout mid-sentence, body trembling as much as yours. Your orgasm followed his, watching him being too much to handle and the overstimulation was perfect.

You two kept moving even after, riding off both of your highs, and all the while you stared at each other's eyes. His stare was so full of feeling that you felt breathless a bit, you closed your eyes, relying on your orgasm to blame if he asked, even if you knew he wouldn't. He awkwardly laid next to you because he could barely fit and you laughed, moving to the side so he could fit. Wordlessly he took the condom out and tied it, placing it next to the bed and you made a mental note to not forget that there.

Laying facing each other you didn't know what to say so you giggled, amused, nervous, and happy at the same time and so did he, possibly for the same reasons. Wooseok moved so you could lay on his chest and so you did, even though you wiggle up in the bed to lay your head on top of the pillow, body seeking support on his. You kept staring at each other until he moved to give you a peck and a small nudge nose to nose. Butterflies invaded your stomach and you felt yourself holding on for dear life inside.

"Do you feel as fucked as I am?", Wooseok said.

"What sense of the word are we talking here, Wooseokie?", you laughed with him.

"You know what I'm talking about. You know, the stares and stuff", his way with words made you smile. You were thankful you didn't feel it alone.

"Yeah, then I feel as fucked as you are…", you kissed him and caressed his hair again, earning a noise almost like a purr.

"Hm. What do we do?", he asked while caressing your hair as well.

"I don't know. Decide what's for dinner?".

"Easy. Pizza", he answered naturally and you snuggled closer.

"Then what we do is call the pizza place". You said quickly and he agreed with a hum. "But now we nap".

"Nap first, pizza later", he said almost asleep and honestly you were the same, the atmosphere too cozy and nice to not succumb to sleep. Maybe you were fucked but at least you were with your adorable dork.

[everyhowlmarksthedead]

❛ F*CKING HIGH ❜

with Neron ‘Creeper’ Vargas.

Request: Hey! Maybe prompt 52. When Creeper get shot and Mayans don't know reader but when hé was high on medication he call her at Vicky's House ? 🙈Something really Fluff ? Thanks!! I love ur writings 😊😊

BY ANON

Warnings: none.

Word count: 1.6k

Aurora says: this writing hasn't been edited, you may find some grammar mistakes, I'm sorry about that!

Gif credits: to the author, I found it on Google.

Masterlist.

The books over the table with a lot of notes scattered around them are starting to give you a horrible headache. You don't know how many hours you have been studying, but you're sure that it was daytime. When you focus your gaze on the horizon, through the window, you're aware of the streetlights turned on outside and the dark sky above Santo Padre. It's your final week to complete the MIR and you have left just one exam. The last one. So, when Creeper told you he was going to travel to Las Vegas for a couple days, you have to recognize that you felt a little alleviated. You want to spend the maximum time possible with him, but you also have to study, but both things aren't compatible. Even so, he should be at home already.

Checking the time on the clock in your wrist, you snort getting up from your chair to pick up the books and your pens. It's enough study for today and you're really hungry. After cleaning the table, you fall down on the sofa turning on the TV and looking in your phone for something to take away. Cooking it's not an option today. Choosing the local pizzeria for excellence, you're about to make the order when an incoming call interrupts your plans. Reading his name on the screen, you answer quickly.

“Babe!”

“Maaaaamaaaa”. He sings, making you frown somewhat confused sitting on the sofa. “Heeeeey, maaaamaaaa”.

“Are you… high, Neron?”

“Yeah… Fuckin' high… for you, my loooove”.

“What the hell? Where the fuck are you?”

“Mama, I want you here. I need you here, maaaama!”

“Ner—”.

“I am… close”.

“Close from what?”

“Border, mama. Close to the border. Come with meeee. I need my nurse, mama, pleaaase”.

“Are you okay? What happened?” Your heart is racing, jumping off from the sofa, running to your shared room.

“A guy shot me, mama. But don' worre', I'm okaaaay”.

“Neron, send me your location right now!”

“Mama, mama, mama, are you comen'?”

“FUCK, NERON, OF COURSE I'M COMING. SEND ME THE FUCKING LOCATION”.

“Don'... Don' shout at me, mama”.

From nowhere, you can hear him crying like a child. Even if he's high, that shit breaks your heart into pieces. Stopping next to your bed rubbing your forehead, barely gulping, you try to calm yourself.

“Are you alone?”

“N—No…”

“The bul—”.

“It's out, mama… I wan—want you here with me. I'm okay, mama, I'm okay… Come with me. Don'... leave me, don' break with me, mama, please”.

“Send me your location, okay? Could you do that for me?”

“Yeah, mama… Are you comen'?”

“Sí, Neron, I'm gonna get dressed, okay?”

“Okay, mama… I love you. I love you, mama. I truly love you, I swear”.

“I know, mi flaquito”.

Hanging up the call, you take some second to breathe calmly before looking for some clothes to put on and grabbing the medical kit when you're ready. They better have something to eat, or there will be more than one man shot. Leaving your house, your phone rings with a notification. The address of Vicki's house. You have heard about it, and you're not surprised at all. According to your boyfriend, this is the favorite place of Mayans. You don't know them, not yet, but you can imagine why they like it this much. Keeping the kit on the back seat, you step in your car turning the engine to follow the instructions recited by the gps.

When it says that you have reached your destiny, you focus through the Camaro's front window to find the house, looking exactly as he described you one day. Going out of the pilot seat and carrying the medical stuff in your right hand, you go upstairs practically jumping them to hit the door with your palm. A girl with brown hair, big eyes and almost naked welcomes you, pushing her by a side before she can talk.

“Hey, hey! Wait! You ca—”.

Coming into the living room, you finally meet his other family. They were drinking and laughing until you appeared, now staring at you confused. The one who you recognize as El Presidente gets up from his chair, the other two are pointing at you with their guns, warned by the bitch behind you.

“I'm from Tijuana, you can't scare me con una pistolita”. (With a gun). You spit with a strong mexican accent, containing a sarcastic laugh.

“Who are y—”.

“MAAAMI, MAAAAMIIIIIIII”.

Hearing your boyfriend calling you, you don't give them a single chance to let you introduce yourself, running upstairs following the laments of Creeper between moans and pleased begs. Disgusting. Opening the last green red door, you finally reach him. The medical kit falls from your hand shocked. Taking a step, you tour his silhouette lying on the mattress. Being shirtless you can see the bandage covering the bullet hole, with some blood trespassing the cotton, and the sling holding the other. His face isn't much better, with some scratches on his left cheek and his temple. The most disturbing is watching him crying like a scared child, trembling and trying to sit up on the bed.

Before the other mexicans can reach you, you're already kneeling on the bed not knowing where you're allowed to touch him and where not.

“Mami, I missed you”.

“You're an idiot, you know it, rai'?” You ask him with your eyes filled with tears, gently caressing the other cheek, while he nods.

Leaning forward you kiss his shaky lips once and again, before feeling his right arm surrounding your waist.

“Let me see the shot, okay?” Whispering, you get up from the bed to take the medical kit, under the look of the men waiting on the door.

“The doctor put it out, disinfected the wound and stitched it up”. El Presidente says, making you frown your eyebrows.

“The doctor, or the vet?”

“Wha—”.

“Answer before I fucking punch you”.

“The vet”.

Of course, it's not the same. Even the medicines that give you in the MIR are stronger than the ones for a veterinarian. Opening the kit over the bed and wearing a pair of blue gloves, you lean on Creeper to take off the bandage and the gauze, narrowing your eyes to see every stitch on it. It's… acceptable, but you could have done it better. Wetting some cotton with iodine, you clean the blood around the suture with soft moves to not hurt him more. Your boyfriend is assorted on how concentrate you look taking care of him.

“Do you know what you are doing, niña?” The oldest one rests his body against the frame.

“'Amma real doctor, not a veterinarian”. You respond without turning at him, but at your kit to find clean gauzes and an adhesive bandage to cover the sewn hole again. “What happened with the other, Neron?”

“Dislocated”. He just says gulping with parted lips.

“What did they gave you for the pain?”

“Just some pills, mami…”

“How many hours ago?”

“Almost ten”. El Presidente replies in his place, making you twist towards him.

“Okay, Creep', I'm going to prick you some morphine”. He just nods.

Grabbing a needle wrapped on a security plastic, you open it to fill it up with the transparent liquid from a small glass bottle. Hitting it softly with two fingers and letting some of the medicine spill on air, you lead the needle to his bare skin over the wound. Nailing it slowly until the metallic part has disappeared inside it. Then, you push the plastic container until empty. Taking off the needle and keeping it again inside its paper, to throw it later, you close the medical kit.

“You need to rest, okay?”

“Mami, stay with me, please… Don' go”. He begs you crying low and holding your hand as strong as he can.

“You need to rest”. You repeat raising both eyebrows and nodding with your chin one time, caressing his grip with your fingers. “I will talk with your friends for a moment. Ain't going anywhere, mi flaquito. Not without you”.

“I love you, mama. I really do”.

“I love you too, Creep'”. Smirking at your boyfriend, you kiss him again having a little more of caring to not hurt him. “Sleep, flaquito”.

Placing the medical kit over a desk, you leave him closing the door, killing with your eyes the men in front of you.

“I'm hungry, so you better find me some dinner”.

“First, tell us who you are, because he's high enough to confuse himself and believe that he's the fucking Messiah”.

“I'm his girlfriend, pendejo. And you're gonna be a dead man if you don't bring me my fucking dinner”.

El Presidente chuckles rubbing his chin, before nodding, seeing you disappear through the opened door again. Coming back to the bed, you can notice that your boyfriend isn't crying anymore, smiling like an idiot. Sighing you lie down by his side, wrapping his body with both arms, letting him find a comfortable posture under them. You can feel his lips kissing your right forearm somewhat sleepy, purring like a cat. Definitely, he's too high.

“Mami, I love you…” He whispers when you begin to caress his neck with your fingertips. “You are the love of my life…”

“Yeah, you already said it… like a lot of times”. You laugh softly, turning towards you with a soft grimace of pain on his face.

“Love you it's my favorite thing”. He mumbles stunned because of the smile on your lips.

“Mine too, babe. I love you more than anything”.

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[barcaavengers]

Complete Safe Haven||Newt Imagine

Note: I'm not that proud of this since I edited it about 6 times. I feel like it lacks something I can't really tell what it is, but here it is! Will definitely write a part two so we will see how everyone responds to it. I was listening to "That Would Be Enough" from Hamilton cause I think it tells a bit how Newt could be somewhat hesitant of the idea of having a baby after everything he has gone through and how unsure he can be of himself, you know? I don't know, that song inspired me a bit. Also, struggled a lot to think how the Safe Haven would be like after two years of them moving there so yep. Feedback and ideas are encouraged! <3

Tag: Tagging those who liked my posts that I was writing it since I said a few weeks ago it was going to be up and totally didn’t. @late-to-the-fandom-party @loverofmazeandthrones @gaymistakeboi @enixgucci @the-panwitch @expectroyalpurple @thepotatoes-havefallen @queenkitten695 @lovefelps @kurtzyoufunkylittledruggyprimary​ @smallsleepywriter​ @haiykuuia​ @sskeletonsoffun @thiccheerioss​ @demiwitchavenger7​ @infinite-piper​ @sungjungelf​ @hanniejji​ @solovehasblindedyou​ @sleepysnapesnake​ @little-odd-dude​ @washing-machine-headcannons​

The soft waves going against your body so early in the morning was your favorite feeling ever since you have gotten to the Safe Haven. The waves would just make you forget what had happened, cleared your head from any memory that was too painful, and those were mostly of that night. You still had nightmares, watching him turn into a Crank, his attacks, him hurting you unconsciously...You were lucky that things ended the way they did, but even then, you knew that those memories would always get to you. Arms rest on your shoulders making you jump, but relax under the knowing touch, rubbing your shoulder blades soothingly and you smile. "Hey."

"Morning, love" Newt's voice was still groggy, you guessed it hasn't been long since he woke up. "Why aren't you in bed?" He presses a kiss on your shoulder before his hands land on your waist, the soft waves rocking you both slightly.

"You kicked me out" you say playfully as you turn to him. 

"What a terrible boyfriend I am," he says with a chuckle. "When was the last time you slept properly?" 

It has been about two years since you have moved to the Safe Haven. The island was now covered in construction, buildings, and houses. Yesterday it was your four year anniversary, and Newt had planned a beautiful evening in what you were proud to call your new house, "First night home" he called it. After living in a small hut that reminded you of the Glade, now you had a bigger house, all for the two of you. You have been looking into The Last City, or what used to be, after Jorge took you and others back a few months ago, and you had the chance to gather a few technology items in a somewhat black market set in the city. The immunes that survived had built a city within the city, but no sign of what Wicked once was. You had seen people losing themselves to the Flare, so you started to play around with the idea of a cure again, using Thomas' blood and trying to figure out what made his blood different, without human trials and finding a way to help without draining him from his blood. You managed to do it with Newt. Vitals were missed when he attacked Thomas' back at the Last City and the serum was administered when he woke up on your way to this place. You took the serum and mixed it with some of Thomas' blood and applied a second dose, that one seemed to have done it. Unfortunately there wasn't enough serum for everyone back there and you had to find a way. 

"I can't say" you admit with a smirk. "I need to keep working…" you say as he removes a strand of hair from your face. 

"You look pale every morning, love" he points out.

"Maybe the late nights I'm working" but you knew better than that. Newt hasn't noticed, but you have been having morning sickness more often and feeling dizzy. 

"Take a break" he kisses your forehead. "We have our new home, we have to enjoy it" he says and you smile. You had a slight idea of what could be going, but instead of raising hopes, you rather wait to get things confirmed. 

Vince had brought a doctor who was the one to help you around the idea of a cure, as well as helped you learn a few things about medicine. She agreed to run a few tests while Newt was out with Thomas, Gally and Minho as they went to check an area for tonight to set a bonfire like back at the Glade, just a close group of friends, you have refused when they asked you to go and went to get the results at the medical hut instead. 

"Hey" you greet the doctor after walking into the tent. 

"Y/N," she greets as she turns around. "Couldn't wait I see?" She teases. 

"I have barely slept" you admit with a nervous smirk. "Between this and thinking of ways to make the cure…"

"You shouldn't lose sleep over this" Elena, the doctor, says as she lifts a piece of paper causing your heartbeat to increase. 

"Oh God…" you mutter. 

"You ready?" She asks as she walks towards you and you nod. "You might not know much about medicine and all this, but you were right" she hands you the piece of paper, your eyes widening. "Congratulations."

For a moment every sound goes silent, it felt like everything around you stopped and so many feelings rushed in. How were you supposed to feel? How would Newt react? "I-"

Elena reaches you and places a hand on your shoulder, "Everything alright?"

"I don't know…" you say. "I never really thought about it...I mean, I did but now that it happened…"

"You are scared" she says and you nod your head slowly. "Don't be" she assures you. "If what you are scared of is Newt's reaction, I think he will be shocked at first, but he will grow to the idea of it. He loves you."

"I can't even think of a way to tell him…" you admit. "What about this place? I don't think it's completely baby proof."

"No place is baby proof. Certainly not during these times" she points out. "Doesn't mean everyone will stop having babies. You will have everyone's support I'm that sure. We will look into ways to get what you need as everything goes" somehow her words made your whole body relax. 

You were away from Wicked, away from the Flare it seemed, but you never trusted that. The Flare could travel through air according to Ava, and Wicked could easily find you if they get as determined as they were, if there was anyone left that would go with such crazy trials. It didn't appear so, the times you have been into the Standing City you have not heard a word from Wicked or possible takers in the tasks. Everyone who survived the attack was just trying to get their lives before the Flare decided their faith, and any immune would just mind their business. Would there be anyone crazy enough to bring back what Wicked once was? Or something worse? Your mind was spinning around the idea. You didn't want your kid to be taken away and used for crazy experiments and trials, you knew that much. Not that you wouldn't do anything in your power to keep them safe from anything that happened. 

You have gone back to your new house and went to lay back on the hammock to try to keep all your feelings in check and find a way to tell Newt the news. Will he be happy? Will he have the same thoughts of bringing a baby to the Safe Haven was a bad timing right now? It wasn't planned, but it wasn't not planned either. It was going to happen eventually. You two were careful, but after some time you two stopped, knowing the consequences but did it anyway. Was it maybe that you both have wanted this but never talked about it with the other? You knew you wanted a life with Newt, wanted everything with him, but what about him? Kids were not something you two have talked about before, because you two were now growing into the relationship and taking bigger steps, like the new house he had built up along with the guys for the two of you. 

"Hey, love" Newt calls as he walks in and you turn around from your hammock.

"Hey" he leans in and you peck his lips once you sit up. "How was it?"

"Well, it's not the Glade," Newt says as he stares off blankly. "but it's big enough for a group of us. I don't think many people would get going in the middle of nowhere and set a bonfire and get drunk...or fight Gally" he chuckles and you join him. 

"The latter is the one people won't get" you say and lean against him, your heart beating wildly as you thought of telling him. 

"Probably" he says and wraps an arm around your waist and pulls you close. "I mean, getting wasted is kind of a thing to go for that one. I don't think that anyone right upstairs would fight Gally, except you when you kicked his ass" he adds. "I'm betting on you to do it again in front of everyone," he smirks. 

"That was a good day" you agree and smirk. "Don't think I'll have the same luck now" he takes your hand and kisses your knuckles. 

"Let's go get ready for tonight" he says and kisses your forehead before pulling you by your hand. 

When you arrive at the bonfire, you see that even if not many have come, it was enough to make you remember your times at the Glade and you feel a knot growing on your throat, eyes watering. You remembered Chuck, Winston and Alby. Newt side eyes you and pulls you close, "I'm okay" you assure him.

"You don't have to be" he throws an arm around your shoulder and kisses the side of your temple. "I know what it feels like," he knew that this was giving you major flashbacks. "They wouldn't want us moping around though, so let's go have some fun" he takes your hand and makes you spin after he pulls away and you giggle, he pulls you close to him again and join the others.

Newt was with the boys while you sat with Harriet, Sonya and Brenda. They knew about your tests, so that was the topic. 

"So? What did they say?" Sonya asks as she leans in. 

"I bet it is what I said. Come on, I can't be the only one who thought about it as soon as she said how she was feeling" Brenda says with her hand extended to you. 

"I don't know if I should tell you" you tease as you grin. "Or just say it at the bonfire...at some point" you say and look back at Newt who gives you a wink, making your cheeks flush. 

"Oh come on, you are gonna make us wait?" Harriet says with a pout. "Please?" Her hand extends and you sigh, pulling out the piece of paper that read the results. You were carrying them around hoping to know when the time would be right. 

The girls gather around Harriet, all of them smiling which only makes you grin wider when their eyes widen and the three look at you in cue. "Oh my God!" Sonya squeals before moving to you and hugging you. 

"Just keep it a secret for a few, I haven't told him yet," you say and she pulls away. 

"Right. Of course. Newt should be the first to know anyway" Sonya says as she pushes her hair back and tries to act normal. "I'm so happy for you guys! It's like everything starts getting normal around here."

"Life wise anyway" Brenda says as she looks at you. "How do you plan on telling him?"

"I'm not sure…" you admit. "but I have to do it soon. Gally is going to bring his moonshine any minute now and I can't find an excuse to neglect it" you point out and just in cue Gally walks to the clearing. 

"Leave that up to me" Brenda says as she stands up and pats your shoulder before walking towards the boy. You eye her curiously and you smile at how nice Gally was around Brenda, not like he wasn't nice with the others, but he smiled and laughed quite often. Brenda puts her hand on his shoulder and you look at Sonya and Harriet. 

"We are as clueless as you are" Harriet says and you laugh. 

Time goes by and you are all eating and laughing. The groups have gotten together and now you were all closer to the bonfire. Gally was around handing over his moonshine and Brenda helped. After everyone had their drink, Brenda spoke, "I know we have done our own bonfires before," she begins, "but this one is different for some of us. To some this is a reminder of how we bonded" she looks at you and you look at Newt who smiles. "For others, it's a reminder that no matter what, we have fun with the people closest to us, our new family" she raises her glass. "For our family" she says and her eyes widen at you and you shake your head before you feel Sonya's hand shoving you slightly, so you stand, holding your own moonshine.

"For our family," your knees feel like giving up on you from how nervous you felt. "For the one that we found..." you trail off. Your heart was beating wildly against your chest, hearing the thuds in your ear. "And for the ones on the way" you say and place a hand on your stomach, your eyes glued to Newt whose eyebrows furrowed in confusion. Then, there was silence for a few seconds.  

"No way!" Frypan is the first to get it, a huge smile on his lips, Minho eyes him like if he was crazy. 

"Am I missing something here? Secret conversation?" You eye the girls and they are laughing at how clueless the boys were after Minho's words.

"Dude, come on! Y/N is going to have a baby!" Frypan pushes Minho before his smile fades for a moment and looks at you. "At least that's what I took as a hint…?" 

You laugh nervously and you eye Newt whose mind seems to be lost in the maze, everyone is looking at you waiting for the confirmation. "Newt, we…" your words feel jumbled up, "You are going to be a dad" you say and everyone starts cheering around. Newt's eyes go wide open as he processes the information, everyone is patting his back and congratulating him but he was motionless. They come to you as well, and even if you are smiling and saying thanks, your eyes were glued to your boyfriend. 

Everyone started to drink and cheer, except Newt who was looking down at his drink, your mood was slowly dropping, but you found some courage to walk to him after a few minutes. "You alright?" You ask as you sit next to him against a log. 

Your voice breaks him out of his trance and he looks at you before nodding his head, "Yeah, just... wrapping my head around what you just said…"

"I know it's a lot to get around with...I still don't believe it…" you say. 

"I should be more excited...and I am, trust me...but I can't help but think…"

"Newt, I know we never-"

"It's not that" he shakes his head and looks at you. "Not the slightest. I might not have said it, but after everything started to settle down, I started to think about us...our future" he says and takes your hand in his. "I thought so many things and you were always there, but…"

"But?" You were expecting the worst. 

"Y/N, I don't have anything to offer to you, or the baby," you frown as you watch him play with your fingers. "Not now, anyway. This place is being built from scraps.."

"Newt, I don't know what you mean by that…" your free hand goes up to his hair, running your fingers through it. 

 "We have a home now, but... We are still getting used to this place, we don't have all the supplies, the equipment…"

"We do this as it goes, like Thomas does" you say to make him smile, which he chuckles at.

"I know" he continues to play with your fingers avoiding your gaze. You could tell he wasn’t at all convinced, so you tighten your fingers around his. 

"Hey," you call. "Talk to me…" You try to meet his gaze, but it was dropped to your fingers. 

"I-" he pauses. "I am happy, I don't want you to think I am not" he finally meets your eyes. "Having everything with you...Just makes this place way better" he smiles. "And having a little girl just like you" he cups your face with one hand and kisses your lips. "Who else can say they survived what we have and have a family" he says playfully and you grin. "But bringing our baby to this...place, this world…" he confesses, his fingers running nervously on his lips. 

"Newt, I know…" you assure him. 

"I don't want them to go through what we did, Y/N…" he admits. "I don't want them to live in a world where they could be chased for being healthy, or feel cursed because they are not immune to the Flare like I was."

"I'm just as scared and I will work on a cure now more than ever...but we can't start worrying like this…" you take his hand and place it on your stomach. "We will figure it out like we always do, together" he is looking at your stomach, his concerned features softening. 

You can see his body relaxing, his thumb moving soothingly on its place on your stomach. "There is a little boy or girl growing right there and it's ours…" 

"I know you'll do anything for them…" you assure him. You felt like Newt had to be reassured, and you could understand where he came from. He has overcome so much to get where he is now, from the dark places of his mind to what was now his new life. He was doubting himself, to not being able to provide your baby with the best, but what was that here in the Safe Haven? The simplest thing you had them already. You were all healthy, you had a home, food, friends...You still had time to get used to the idea and get adjusted at the thought that soon it was going to be more than just the two of you. 

The Safe Haven has provided you with everything you needed for a basic life, and every now and then as you went to the remains of the city you tried to bring something that would help. Jorge and Brenda were working with technology along with some of the other Gladers from other groups. It was true, this place was being brought up by remains of what once was the Last City, but it was getting close to what you once imagined it would turn to. 

"I love you, princess…" he pulls you in and gives you a kiss, the type he holds his breath and let's go of it softly through his nostrils, making it last. "I'm sorry for not acting like you probably wanted me to…"

"I get it. It's a lot to take in. I feel the same way" you admit. "I was so scared of what you would say" you pause. "But we have gone through so many things together that I don't think a baby will be the exception" you voice. 

"It scares me to death to be quite honest" he says with a smirk. "I'm trying my best to be optimistic here, I am" he paused. "I'm happy to start a family with you, but just the thought of what could happen… This place is not ready for a baby…"

"I know...but we have time. We will know…" he is staring at you lovingly, smiling. 

"Congratulations!" Thomas joins you with Frypan, sitting right besides you. 

"Took you long enough" Minho says as he steps in. 

In the deepest part of your head, you were somewhat disappointed that the boys seemed to be more excited about it then Newt. Yes, the blonde was scared of the what ifs and the possibilities and so were you, yet something told you that he wasn't very wrapped around the idea of it and his mind was only repeating the bad scenarios. 

"Shut up, Minho" Newt says, but the boy only grins. 

"I am going to have a little helping hand in the kitchen in a few months" Fry says. 

"I could use the help patrolling" Thomas and Vince have established a guard in the island. Not like much happened, you knew everyone and they all went by the rules set, but it gave you the sense of feeling that if anything were to happen, you'd be ready. 

"You are all doing bloody plans without the baby even being born" Newt says. 

"Don't look at me I haven't said anything," Minho says. "It'd be nice if it has Y/N's genes though. No offense."

"Well that baby wasn't done just by me, Minho, so be ready" you say playfully. 

"I don't need to know the whole thing so if you can skip the lesson" Minho says. 

"Newt, you alright?" Thomas calls out and you look behind you at your boyfriend. 

"Yeah, just, thinking…" you frown. "Just give me some time, that's all" he admits and smiles, placing his hand on your belly and looms up at you, something told you he will grow to the idea of it soon. 

"So Y/N, can't drink with us now, so let's drink for her" Minho raises his cup and Fry cheers, shoving Newt playfully. 

"To our baby, I guess" he says with a shrug. 

"Our?" Minho questions. 

"Not ours you slinthead" Newt reaches to try to smack the back of Minho's head playfully. "Ours" he looks down at you and you smile softly. 

"It's the baby from our Glade anyway" Thomas says. "I'm happy for the two of you" he gives your arm a soft squeeze and you nod your head. 

"So, when is it too soon to start thinking of names?" Fry asks and the boys look at you. 

"How the hell should I bloody know?" Newt asks after sipping on his cup making the boys chuckle. 

Thomas eyes you as the guys talk to each other, and his eyebrows furrow in question. You shake your head and do a small wave with your hand to tell him that you will talk to him later. If someone could help you understand what was going through Newt's mind was Thomas, or Minho, but mostly Thomas. Newt seems to trust him more for a few things. 

Now it was a matter to wait and see how things went. At least it was out there that you were expecting, and Newt knew. Thing now was, how everything was going to start working after these news… 

[h0neyjaehyun]

Title // Hickey

Summary // Tali got a hickey....but not exactly from a human.

Prompt 1

#25 : "Is that a hicky?"

Note // Of course no problem, also I hope this is what you mean by anonymous if not I can edit no problem I don't mind.ʕ•ᴥ•ʔ😊

Tali thought it was gonna be a peaceful day. The day was good nothing bad happened. She went to visit Hyunjin well more like Hyunjin's dog Kami. She went to go babysit the dog since his family out aswell and she was off, so she offered to babysit his dog. He accepted, knowning Kami already liked Tali since thats Kami was a gift from her to Hyunjin.

"Are you sure?"

"Yes I'm positve that I can, no need to worry."

"But shouldn't you be resting inst-"

"Hyunjin I'm fine please, Im probably gonna nap with Kami anyway."

"Okay okay the key is-"

"Under the lap light yes I understand how to get in, now I gotta go bye"

"Fine, bye take care"

"You too"

Tali ended the call, shaking her head at it, wow I feel like he doesn't trust me in my dog care abilities I literally gave him the dog?

She was confusing herself while she was getting ready, she wrote a note saying,

Hey, Im babysiting one of Straykids dogs for today. I will be back either tomorrow morning for practice, or coming back to change, and no, no you can not come with me so don't even try.

Love, Tali

She then left it there in the kitchen counter of Nct 127 dorm more specifically the 5th floor with her leader so he won't get terrified on where she went.

Then she was off, she stopped by a few stores to get treats for Kami and some groceries for herself to cook because she doesn't want to use Hyunjin's parents groceries.

She grabbed the key with a little trouble, and went in she put down the groceries on the counter and went to go see Hyunjins dog. Kami was about to bark at her until he recognized her and started running towards her a licking her face.

"Ah wait wait chill" Tali giggled. Almost falling down.

Here Tali gave Kami food and honestly went about her day, she wrote music, watched tv with Kami, walked Kami, and finally it was 6, they boys already called in to check on her asking if they should comeover and give her food, her knowing they just don't like her in another idols houses specifically Stray kids . After the incident with the crane + plus kiss, they were jealous.

"No Johnny I'm okay I've taken care of this dog before I'm fine I bought groceries before I got here anyway so no, but nice try."

"Ha ha very funny, I'm just trying to keep you safe."

"Yeah I understand, but you also just don't like me in one of the members Stray Kids houses." Tali said teasingly.

"WE ARE NOT JEALOUS" Haechan yelled from across the room, eavesdrop on the conversation.

"YEAH WELL SAY THAT TO YOUR 20 MESSAGES FOR ME TO BRING YOU WITH ME" Tali yelled back

She heard the boys laugh.

"Well either way Im gonna take a nap I will text you when I wake up."

"You promise" Tali froze at the word promise, she didn't like promising anything if knowing she couldn't keep it.

"Nope bye love you guys"

"No wai-" Tali cut them off, she was remembering things she didn't want to remember so then Kami went on her lap comforting her.

"Why are you so mean to the others but not me huh, you scare them sometimes....even your own owner." Tali said in disbelief. Kami just barked in response.

Tali was tired so she took a nap on the couch with Kami but more like sleep since she didn't wake up till 5am. Kami was licking her face and neck. A little too much since she got some little bruises there not noticing when she showered or changed. She did everything for Kami in the morning, walked him, fed him etc. Knowing Hyunjin would come in a hour she cooked something for him so he won't forget to eat left a not and she left to go to practice.

She came in the practice room, seeing Yuta run up to her and tackle her with a hug.

"Hi Yuta" she said with a grunt.

"Hello my ass, I missed you"

" Yuta I was literally gone for just a day"

"Thats not the point" Haechan intervened.

Thats when Tali was gently yanked from both Yuta and Haechan's arms into, Doyoungs examining her neck.

"Is that a hickey??"

Everyone stopped or froze on what they were doing and now looking at the two, Doyoung had a hand on her neck caressing the three little bruises, that weren't even made from a human being more like a dog.

Tali herself was confused, she hasn't done it with anyone since....well her early teen years , she went up to the mirror trying to remember where she got the little bruises.

"Huh....I dont know" Tali said mostly to herself.

"WHAT" They said in unison.

" What do you mean you don't know??" Mark said in disbelief.

Then all of them started asking her questions. Them asking if she was forced or something for not to remember? She blocked them out thinking where she got those bruises. Then remember Kami licking her neck a lot.

"Oh...I think" she said out loud not bothered by the questions being asked.

"Wait, shhh, what was that??" Jaehyun made them quiet while they were lookin for Tali to finish her sentence.

"I think it was the dog..." Tali still in thought.

"THE WHAT"

"Wait wait hear me out, no one is at the house, the only beings in there were me and Kami which is the dog. Hyunjin was doing promotions while his parents were out for the day. Also the dog was licking my neck a lot because of the lotion." Tali remembering what happened.

The boys justs stoof there trying to process the information give to them.

"So the dog gave you a hicky on your neck?" Johnny clarified.

"Yeah, also im not doing that, oh no no. Its been a couple years of since I did any of THAT" Tali said clarifying that she never did the dirty with anyone.

"Oh okay okay....." they all said understanding what she meant, then Taeyong turned around back at her processing the last part.

"WAIT IN A COUPLE YEARS??"

[fenheart87]

Blue Changes

We had a fun little challenge, we picked a prompt and had 3, 15 minute sprints to write something for the prompt. Then 24 hours for light editing to finish sentences if needed, grammar etc. This is my take on the the prompt "Has anyone ever told you just how adorable you are Because you really are." Dedicated to @verfound 🧡

“Marinette, where is my favorite designer at?!” Jagged burst into the studio, Fang trotting happily next to him on her leash and Penny multitasking between her phone call and tablet. Technically he was supposed to be on a plane to New York, but decided to swing by Paris on his way because he had an idea that just could not wait and wanted to check on his unofficial niece anyways. There was only one speed bump in that plan, the studio was completely empty. The chaos of fabric strewn about and pieces half cut with scissors still mid snip definitely screamed someone was working hard or trying to at least, the mannequin with a half-pinned design and ripped fabric seemed to lean toward the latter.

“Looks like she’s not here… Must be taking a break. Penny, why don’t we order from my favorite bakery and make sure something extra special for Marinette. I’m glad we came here before the next stop on tour.” Jagged poked around at the sketches laying in abandon on the desk, some half crumbled on the floor and more stacked on a sketchbook.

“Seems like she is having some massive creators block… We should treat her when we have a break on the tour.” Penny suggested, already on the phone with Tom and trying to insist they would pay for their order.

Some of the sketches were brilliant but had marks of black throughout them, others were completely marked out and you could not even tell what the design was to start with. It hurt to physically see what pain Marinette was going through, most of the ones with the darker markings were of the same style. He could clearly see the thought of Adrien in the suits and matching dresses for Marinette, the anger of the marks showing something had happened or changed. Sighing heavily, Jagged gathered the papers, Fang batting the ones further away with her tail over to her owner. One paper had him blinking in surprise.

“Penn! Pen! Lookie here! D'ya see this?!” jagged shouted, shoving the paper into his assistant’s face, not even minding when she sighed and pushed it to a proper distance. It was a one-of-kind leather jacket and a custom hoodie drawn to match it. Either could be worn seperate or paired together. The colors were a contrast of electric blue and smokey turquoise, the theme was music and snake. Jagged recognized it as a rough sketch due to the lack of color or material notes along the edge that appeared on her finished drafts.

“Why was this crumpled up? It’s a really great idea!” Penny wondered aloud, noticing that the eccentric rockstar she commonly felt like she had to babysit was scheming. “Jagged no, whatever is it the answer is no.”

The door opened and in walked the designer they were looking for, Marinette seemed stressed and a bit run down. Her hair was thrown into a messy bun, one sleeve was pushed higher than the other and her shirt was wrinkled where it was tucked into her pencil skirt. Flip flops clacked along with her steps, another sign she was worn out if the basic shoe was more preferred to her custom made and very comfortable flats. An energy drink dangled from one hand and her design tablet occupied the other. Both guests watched as she made it all the way to her desk without noticing they were there.

“I have no idea what I'm going to do! I don't have anyone that fits that one or the orange one… I could make it a dress but who would wear it?! Ugh! I’m going to fail at this rate and then I won't graduate and I'll never design again, who would want something made by a failure-” Fang chose that moment to nudge her head onto the petite woman’s lap, startling her so bad she screamed and fell out of her chair.

“Well I reckon that I would love to have exclusive rights to all designs made by my favorite niece but we all know that’s not fair to the rest of the world. Now I know you are in a pinch and you’re stuck like a boat in the desert, so you’re going to take a break, spend some time with uncle Jay and make sure that you show poor Fang some love, she was all excited and you just screamed right in her poor face. C’mere my poor baby, Marinette is so mean I know.” Jagged showed the croc in love through pets and scratches. 

“When.. How, why?” Poor Marinette was lost and couldn't believe the rockstar was in her studio when he should've been halfway around the world for the next stop on his tour. 

“Okay, the only thing we’re doing right now is leaving all this behind for a much needed break for food and maybe a nap in your case. Time to relax and stop stressing for a minute." Penny authoritatively stepped in, stacking the papers on the desk, handing Marinette her purse and phone and with the help of Fang scooted the younger woman out the door.

Marinette protested "Wait I need to finish, it has to be done! I can't take a break, I just did!"

"Negative, now it's time for chow, and you need a shower, at your parents then we need to have a little chat. Ladies first!" Jagged gently shoved the designer into the car with cheer, allowing Fang and Penny to enter before him. 

"So my little brilliant niece, we have some great news and a rock and roll deal for you! Can't tell you what is until after you've taken a break though." They grinned as Marinette grumbles as she gave fang the attention she wanted until they pulled up to the bakery.

Getting out of the car first, Marinette sighed at the smell of her parents baking, the smell melting off some stress like butter melting on a fresh from the oven croissant roll. Her stomach grumbled and she opened the door for the other guests, sneaking an excited Fang upstairs to not scare the other customers. Deciding to take a refreshing shower, Marinette went to her bathroom and put on some zen meditation music before getting in the shower. Quick ten minutes later and she was feeling much more alive and hungry. On a whim she grabbed a random outfit that she had made but never worn, pleated plaid skirt with a red checker pattern offset by the off the shoulder fitted top in a burgundy color, and threw it on before joining her guests. 

"Oi looking good! One of yours?" Jagged shouted with his mouth full, causing Penny to smack his arm as a reminder to use manners. 

"Sure is! Never worn it before but decided change can be a good thing and sometimes you have to start the change instead of waiting for it to happen." Grabbing her favorite pastry and a croissant because you can't just smell one and not eat it, she missed the concerned look her adopted guardians shared.

"So your studio was, well, you seem to be having a hard time." Pen tried to be gentle but made a face at her words.

"Yeah… Life is… Changing." Marinette mused, picking at the pastry.

"Marinette, what can Uncle Jay do to help?" Jagged's serious tone drew her gaze and his heart broke at the sight of unshed tears.

"I uhm well. I- That is, we-" With a huff, she calmed down and a look of determination shone on her face. "Adrien asked me out, on a date date in this really elaborate way. I turned him down. I have no idea what I was thinking but when he asked me I was so happy and then all I could think of was blue and how soft its is and it can be so calm or so chaotic and it’s always changing like the ocean but yet it's always the same and there this feeling of calm and I just couldn't say yes."

The quiet settled into a slightly awkward silence, Marinette was ignoring it and Penny was having nonverbal argument with Jagged on what to say next. With an eye roll that spoke louder than her shouting at him, the assistant took the lead once more. Quietly she rose from the chair she was occupying and sat next to the young designer smoothing out the crumpled sketch she had taken from the studio.

"Is this the blue you're talking about?" 

"Yeah… That’s my blue." A gentle smile touched peach lips briefly, blue eyes going soft.

"Is this the skater kid?"

"Skater kid?" Marinette blinked in confusion.

"Nah Pen it's the boat kid."

"He has a name you guys!" Marinette broke down into giggles, looking much more like herself and less like a zombie just waltzing around and going through the motions. "His name is Luka, yes the one who went me skating with Adrien and Kagami, yes the boat kid who has a heart way too big for just his mom and sister. And now me…"

"Sounds like you made a change?" Penny prompted smiling widely.

"A blue one yeah, I did."

"Has anyone ever told you just how adorable you are?" Jagged shouted, picking up the younger woman and swinging her around as she shrieked. 

"Okay Jagged, let's not take over her whole day. We did have a reason to show up here after all." Penny handed the tablet to Marinette after he relinquished his hold. "This is what we're looking at for a surprise concert once we are back here in Paris. There's some issues I'm ironing out but I wanted to see what you think and if you would take lead on the design aspect."

"Wait, lead designer for your show?" Blue bell eyes swiveled between ocean blue and hazel sets, wide with disbelief and building excitement.

"Yup, this tablet is yours by the way. I do ask you to keep just business on it for the show, if you want more traditional sketches that's fine but once it's done it needs to be uploaded on here." Jagged explained, clapping a red clad shoulder.

"Oh you need an opening act? I've got that covered." The sparkle was finally back in her eye to match the mischievous grin.

"I agree with Jagged, are you sure no one has said it before because you really are adorable."