#and I'm fucking sick

[a-sassy-bench]

do able-bodied people not understand that if disabled people call out of work every time they don't feel good that we would call out of work every fucking day?

like honestly. what do you think being disabled means?

[nezreblogz]

[inkskinned]

there are a lot of posts out there that are positive and healthy coping mechanisms for handling the holidays. this is not one of them :)

i think there's like. going to be times in your life you will be stuck in a social situation that you cannot escape from gracefully. i do not know why the internet doesn't believe these times exist. it's not always just that your physical safety is at risk - sometimes it's legit like "i just don't currently have the energy or time to put in the effort of responding to this." sometimes it's a coworker you hate so much. sometimes it's just like, fine, you know? like you know you can handle your aunt when she's cheerily horrible, but if you actually set a boundary around her, it's going to be weeks of fallout with your father.

i don't know why people think the answer is always just "cut them out!" or "don't let them get away with that!" because ... the real world is tricky and complicated. i think kind of a lot of us have an internal "radiation poisoning" meter for certain people. like - i'm talking about the ones who are absolutely giving you gradual ick damage. like, you can handle them, but you'll be exhausted.

and yes. you absolutely should listen to your therapist and the good posts about handling others and set good boundaries and take care of yourself. prioritize peace.

HOWEVER :) ...... since im often in a situation with a Gradual Sense of Ick person i cannot just "cut out" of my life (without losing someone else precious to me) - i have sort of developed the most. maladaptive form of mischief possible. because like, if i'm going to have to listen to this shit again, i like to have a little bit of private fun with it.

now! again, i am physically safe, just mentally drained by this man. you should only do this with people you are not in danger with. which leads me to my suggestions for when your Unfortunate Acquaintance shows up and says oh everyone pay attention to me.

my favorite word is "maybe!" said as brightly and happily as possible. whenever the Horrible Person starts in on a topic you do not want to go further with, particularly if they make a claim that you know to be inaccurate, do not respond to it. you and i have both tried to actually argue with this person, and it hasn't gone well, because this person just wants the drama of an argument. however, "maybe!" gives them literally nothing to go on. it is incredibly disarming. they are used to people having some response. they know they can't prove what they're saying, and maybe! treats them like the child they are. it dismisses them in the politest way possible.

i like to say maybe! and then, in their stunned silence, immediately change the subject. this is because i have adhd and i will have something unrelated to talk about, but if you can't think of topics fast enough, i recommend just pointing to something and saying, "isn't that lovely?" because fuck you let's bring in some positivity.

by the way. that second trick - of pointing to something and stating an opinion about it? - that just works on its own, like, 70% of the time. i picked it up from teaching preschoolers. it's an intentional "redirect". it stops children crying and it also stops grown adults from finishing their explanation on why women belong in kitchens. dual wielding!

keep it silly for yourself. i absolutely do not care if people think i'm fucking stupid (it's more fun if they do) and as a result i will purposefully misunderstand things just to see how long it takes them to realize i've completely removed them from the subject at hand. when they say "women aren't funny" i get to be like. "which women." "all women." "all women in america?" "no in the world." "like the mole people? the people in the world?" "what? no. like, alive." "oh are we not counting the mole people?" "what the fuck are you talking about." "you don't believe in the mole people?"

similarly, i play a personal game called "one up me." my Evil Acquaintance literally knows this game exists (my family & friends caught onto it and now also play it) and it always fucking gets him. i don't know why. you have to be willing to be a little free-spirited on this one, though. the trick is that when they make one of those horrible little bigoted or annoying comments they are always making, you need to go one unit weirder. not more intense, mind you - just more weird. "you don't look good in that dress." "yeah, actually, my other dress was covered in squid ink due to a mishap at the soup store." "you shouldn't wear such revealing clothes." "wait, what? oh shit. sorry, your son tears off strips when no one is looking and eats them. i swear it was longer before we left the building."

the point of "one up me" is to completely upend this person's narrative. we both know this person likes setting up situations where you cannot "win" and then they really like telling other people how badly you handled it. in a usual situation, if you respond "please don't say something that rude", you're a bitch. but if you let it happen, you're letting yourself be debased. they are not usually expecting door number three: unflappably odd. because what are they going to say when they're telling everyone how badly you behaved? "she said my son eats her dresses" ".... okay?"

if you can, form an allyship with someone whomst you can tagteam with. where they can pick up on your weird "soup store" story and run with it.

the following phrase is amazing and can be deployed for any situation: "oh, be nice :) it's the holidays!" i do not know why this works as often as it does. i'll say it for the most random shit. i think this is bc most of the time these people know they're being impolite, they just like to fight.

godbless. when in doubt, remember that you could always start stealing their pens.

the whole point of this is - if you can't escape. maybe see how long you can just be. like. a horrible little menace.

[nohaijiachi]

I hate you AI, I hate you sites making deals with souless corporations that think creativity can be replicated by an unthinking machine, I hate you money-hungry investors and ceos, I hate you opt-out models, I hate you tech bros, I hate you having to spend precious free time having to scramble our art in a desperate attempt not to getting stolen from, I hate you minimization of the hard work we put into our craft, I hate ''''machine learning''''' being compared to a very human person putting in the hours to better themselves, I hate you commodification of the very core of human's expression, I hate you scams being helped along by uber plagiarism, I hate you AI, I hate you AI, I hate you AI, I HATE YOU AI

[bigfatbreak]

BLACKOUT : destroys all light

so have you all been keeping up with Scarlet Lady 👀

[thevioletcaptain]

i genuinely don't care how good a piece of ai generated art or writing looks on the surface. i don't care if it emulates brush strokes and metaphor in a way indistinguishable from those created by a person.

it is not the product of thoughtful creation. it offers no insights into the creator's life or viewpoint. it has no connection to a moment in time or a place or an attitude. it has no perspective. it has no value.

it's empty, it's hollow, and it exists only to generate clicks (and by extension, ad revenue.)

it's just another revolting symptom of the disease that is late stage capitalism, and it fucking sucks.

[orgasming-caterpillar]

5k notes before Christmas and I'll tell my mom that I'm a transmasc lesbian

[nyaskitten]

Hey, I REALLY do not appreciate how much I've seen people act like the Palestinian Genocide is just some random drama. That is a fucking GENOCIDE, innocent people are dying every single day, one death is already one death too many, yet so many I've seen (more on Twitter than here) are treating it like just some drama. "I wanna remain neutral, both sides are just as bad."

MOTHERFUCKER THIS IS A GENOCIDE, NOT SOME STUPID INTERNET DRAMA, INNOCENT PALESTINIANS ARE BEING BRUTALLY MURDERED EVERY SINGLE FUCKING DAY, AND ALL YOU CAN DO IS SAY YOU HATE BOTH SIDES? FUCK YOU. IF YOU DON'T STAND FOR SOMETING YOU'LL FALL FOR ANYTHING.

[procrastinationaccount]

The way Gideon and Dulcinea wanted to bounce in and out of the lives of their loved ones and only leave a positive impact without getting too vulnerable and Harrow and Palamedes just wanted them to stay for as long as they could. The way they sacrificed themselves because they didn't want to let them sacrifice anything else. The way they were both raised to think of themselves as bound to the service of mouldering houses that they hated, even both specifically born with the intention that they would die young. The way they both have to keep reminding themselves that the person they love is young and can't handle this shit. I'm either on to something or this is just the fevered ravings of a dying mind. They made a war of their lives.

[gallusrostromegalus]

You know how ginger ale is meh until you're on an airplane and then it's the nectar of the gods? Arizona Iced Tea is the same for me only instead of airplanes it's a major throat problem.

[thebibliosphere]

Is this the start of a migraine or just a normal headache... guess we'll find out.

[the-writer-of-waterdeep]

If I see one more post treating Gale and Mystra like a genuine couple I will scream

In a game where all the companions are in relationships with immense power imbalances, don't you think Gale is in one too????

It is heavily implied that Mystra (A goddess known in the Forgotten Realms for tricking and deceiving, look up Dornal Silverhand) groomed Gale, being his teacher first and then a lover. He didn't fumble anything, he was the magical equivalent of a high school banging his teacher and everyone (more like in real life with male abuse survivors) treats it like he "bagged a baddie" and "fumbled it"

The most horrific thing is that he STILL doesn't quite realise what's happening, he still believes everything she says and believe she knows best for him.

Also, he wasn't trying to unsup her, that's what Mystra saw it as. He adored her and wanted to be her No.1 special little guy so he did something FUCKING OUTRAGEOUS out of LOVE (because he believed and still believes it's love). Does Mystra have the right to interpret it as an attack on her godhood, absolutely but don't get it twisted with what Gale actually says!

"Not to destroy Mystra, but to prove my love for her"

"I merely sought to return one tiny diamond to an imperfect crown"

Sorry for ranting but FUCK.

[shifuaang]

My friend @the-velvet-worm made such a good point about Chaggie earlier that I feel like it needs to be shared. Her quote: "It's not lost on me that they're not hypersexual like a lot of more popular f/f ships, and no, there's nothing wrong with being into something because there's palpable sexual tension, but I feel like a lot of it is fetishizers being unable to fetishize it?"

EXACTLY.

Chaggie is the least fetishized wlw ship I've seen on any show. It feels like it's constructed from the female gaze because it is, for once. The writing even makes fun of and paints Adam in the wrong for being crass about their relationship and using it as fodder for his own nasty fantasies.

And it's not like Chaggie are chaste. They sleep in the same bed, it's implied that they have sex, and they are very physically affectionate with each other, but because Hazbin isn't showing full-on porn of them, the fandom says they have 'no chemistry.'

I also think there's this cognitive dissonance in the fandom where Hazbin isn't afraid to push the envelope in a lot of ways, and kinks and sex and all types of debauchery are mentioned and depicted all of the time, so they are expecting that out of Chaggie as well. BUT! part of the point is that this relationship is subversive for Hell and for the show in general, which is what makes it so good in my opinion.

It's crazy that people would think that Hazbin writers/animators are "too scared" to do anything controversial with Vaggie and Charlie's relationship when we've seen first-hand that practically nothing is off the table when it comes to this show. That just seems like a bad faith reading of the way Hazbin is portraying its bigger themes of forgiveness/redemption and where the characters have come from with Chaggie. Just because you don’t personally enjoy their dynamic doesn't mean that it's 'bad' or 'poorly written'.

[yesmissnyx]

An Unsexy Post About Censorship

Sooo...gumroad is shutting down NSFW content sales because of Stripe and Paypal. This is also why Wishtender has been down as well, if you weren't aware. And why Patreon is also cracking down on anything remotely kinky.

(If you're wondering why your favorite FICTIONAL sexual content isn't allowed on most platforms, it's payment processors.)

Please be extra kind to anyone who works with NSFW content right now, whether it be art, writing, audio, photos or video. Whether it be tasteful erotica, or the kinkiest BDSM porn you can think of, we're all in the crosshairs right now.

And, judging by trends from these past few years, this is only going to get worse.

Support NSFW creators where you can, whether by tipping or buying our content (where you still can) or just helping boost content on sites where algorithms want to drown us out.

Call representatives where you can and complain about payment processors acting as arbiters of what YOU are and aren't allowed to pay for and enjoy.

This may be about porn right now, but censorship of this caliber doesn't just stop with porn. Any transgressive (read: non-conservative) media is fair game.

Fight against it where you can. Support creators where you can.

Art is important. Reflections of our sexuality are important. We don't want a world where people aren't free to make or see the things they love and enjoy.

[carbonmonoxide-detector]

Hostile reminder from your favorite carbon monoxide detector and HR admin:

3 days of sick time out of 365 is a fucking joke

Some states get 5 days, and it's still a fucking joke

Zero tolerance attendance policies are a fucking joke and a cop-out for actually giving a shit and taking extra steps to support your employees

Corporations do not give a single shit about you beyond your capacity to make them profitable

Take your fucking sick/vacation time.

You can take pride in your work and your place in your job and still subscribe to these points

[incesthemes]

seriously do they even hear themselves