#and ahhh the book-- everyone's stuff is so beautiful!!

[somnimagus]

My page for @sheikahzine; about Impaz's duty to her village, empty of people and full of memories.

[id in alt text]

[ifearzombies]

In The Bath

An Asmo X MC one shot (with the Fam joining later)

     “Ahhh... Nothing like a soak in hot water to make the skin even MORE radiant,” Asmo coos as he pulls you close and kisses your head, “Even better when I can enjoy you~.”

    “It is nice... A nice, intimate moment... Just a shame we can’t do this with everyone.”

     “Why everyone? Is the beautiful Asmodeus not enough,” he asks you with a pout.

    “What? Asmo. That’s not what I meant and you know that.” You poke his cheek. “I mean that... Just enjoying a bath, cleaning and preening each other, talking, splashing a bit of water... Just... Like the breakfast we had that Beel and I made.”

     “That was amazing,” Asmo notes, “Plus a family bath would mean getting to see everyone naked~... Ooohhh... I bet Diavolo has the best dilf looking man tiddies... I would love to see them~!”      You snort as you bust out laughing. “Oh pitchforks! Asmo. Don’t ever let Lucifer catch you saying that! So... Family bath... I wonder if we could convert a room into a giant bath for everyone...”      “There are a few rooms not really being used on the lower floor... I wonder if we could ask Lucifer to knock down a wall and just turn it into a large bath. Plus. Having more than ONE in the house for everyone would be nice... While I have my own, I know it’s hard on everyone else.”

     “Let’s finish up here first and then we’ll ask.”

     “Can we make sweet love,” Asmo asks as he begins running his hands over your body.

     “Asmo if we do that, we’re not leaving the tub until tomorrow.”

     “And~?”

     “Not tonight, love.”

     “Poo!” Asmo pouts, but relents and gets back to cleaning every inch of you. You have to admonish him a little for getting too handsy (and expecting you to get handsy as well) before you two finally get cleaned and get dried off.

     You let Asmo put you in cute pajamas and style your hair before you’re allowed to go see Lucifer and you both go to his office. You don’t knock. You just open the door as you know he’s just looking over Mammon’s credit card bills from the sounds of his cursing.

     “Hey Lucifer, my dear,” you ask as you approach, Lucifer looking at the two of you with some annoyance.

     “Out with it. I’m busy.”

     “Lucifer! How dare you talk to our darling like that. Mammon sure. But your gem of a brother and our darling. How dare,” Asmo states firmly.

     “... You’re right. My apologies. What do you two wish to discuss,” Lucifer asks with a softer tone.

     “Sooo... You know how we only have the one main bathroom,” you start, “And how we have like, three study rooms on the first floor that don’t really get used all that much? What if we converted one into another toilet and the big one with the four seater table? What if we convert that into a giant hot tub? Like for family baths. Like our own private onsen?”

     Asmo bounces happily. “Plus then Mammon won’t pay to go to a spa for hot tub stuff. And Beel can use it to relax his muscles after working out. And Levi can fully soak himself. Oh and Satan and Belphie would love it too!”

     Lucifer hums in thought for a moment. “... Another toilet overall would be a good idea. And... you make a good case for the giant hot tub. You’re right that we all study in the living room or dining room anyways... Those rooms are mostly just collecting dust since we all go to our own rooms for privacy... Mammon’s debts need to be cleared first. Then we can budget for it.”      You look to Asmo: “Sexy photo shoot of Asmo and sell the books?”

     “Oooh! We’ll get Solomon to take the pictures! And tasteful nudes only. Only the best for this Gem of the realms!”

     Lucifer sighs. “If it pays this off so we can renovate and it’s JUST pictures of Asmo, I will agree.”

     You and Asmo both squeal in delight and leave to go to Asmo’s room to start planning. You got Solomon in a three way call and explained the plan and he was in.

     It took a few weeks, but soon the debts were paid off and the renovations were done. The room was slightly expanded and it could easily fit everyone.

     You stand there beside Asmo in nothing but a robe. “So... You wanna go in first?”

     “I knew you’d want to see me naked~.” Asmo undresses and gets in, sinking into the hot water. “Ahhh... Perfect!”

     You remove your robe and get in beside Asmo. You lean against him as Beel comes in after.

     “Wow! This is so big,” Beel says as he removes his robe and then gets in, “Oh... This feels so nice on my back.” He practically melts as he moves to sit beside you. “I can fit, stretch out... And it’s nice where my wings are...”

     “Damn. This looks amazing,” Mammon adds as he waltzes in, straight into the water and pouts since he can’t sit next to you. Still, he quickly relaxes. “It’ll make me look extra good for my modeling~.”

     One by one each brother enters and comments on how nice it is. Levi goes to his demon form and curls up at the bottom of the bath, his tail around your ankle. Satan brings a laminated book and a bottle of water. Belphie sits beside Beel so Beel can make sure he doesn’t slip into the water while he sleeps. Lucifer is last to enter, a tray of glasses and bottle of Demonus in hand, and he sinks into the water. You can see the stress melt from his face as he relaxes.

     “Ahhh... This is nice. We can save money by not going to onsens anymore since we can relax here.” He turns and pours everyone a glass and all but Belphie and Levi partake- the former asleep and the latter quite content at the bottom of the bath.

     “We should invite Solomon, Simeon, Diavolo, and Barbatos over at some point,” you say, “I’d love to have baths with them too.”

     “Another time. For now... Let us enjoy this to ourselves,” Lucifer says as he leans and gives you a kiss, “And you and Asmo. Thank you. This was a great idea.”

[naffeclipse]

NAAAAAFF :D HI!!! Recently I binge-read all of Sleuth Jesters and since then I’ve been rooting through your blog for any additional content like a raccoon through a dumpster <3 Legitimately better than some published books I’ve read. Thought it was worth mentioning that after Vigilante, Moon and Eclipse got shot I remember joking to myself “hey, now all that’s left is for Sun to get shot, then everyone will have had a turn! We’ll be four for four! C’mere, Sunny boy!” … needless to say, I began regretting that joke VERY QUICKLY. I felt like that “no no no WAIT WAIT WAIT” meme. Sun, my boy, I am so sorry :’) But seriously though, that moment?? Eclipse’s reaction?? Calling out to Sun in shock, then again in what almost looks like anger? Because no, that didn’t happen, I didn’t shoot you, I don’t make mistakes like this, so just get the hell up! Almost as if he’s angry at Sun, at the universe for allowing this to happen, because surely it can’t be his own fault, right? That’s impossible. Like he’s prepared to blame everyone and everything but himself for what HE just did, because despite everything, despite all his threats and bitterness and trying to convince himself otherwise, he still loves his little brothers. AND MOON, frozen there in horror, because this all just happened too fast and now it’s like the world’s been flipped on its head, because he also never truly believed Big Brother would or could follow through on those threats. Not like this. It’s such a short scene (there would’ve been what, ten seconds tops between Sun getting shot and the ceiling collapsing?) but it’s SO impactful, with very little going on but also everything is happening at the same time. It lives rent free in my brain, I am OBSESSED WITH IT. I’m DYING just like Sun and Eclipse haha  to know, what would have happened if the ceiling hadn’t collapsed on Eclipse, at least not at that moment? What would he have done?? What would MOON have done?! CURSE YOU, BUILDING, YOU HAVE TERRIBLE TIMING!! (God, these brothers have got me in a chokehold. Chewing on them, shaking them, gazing at them, rattling them around in my brain constantly. I LOVE THEM YOUR HONOUR.) Whoops this got longer than intended. Long story short, thank you for reminding me of how much I secretly love detective noir stuff, Naff <3 Your writing is beautiful and I am studying it and you to hopefully pick up on the thought and care you put into everything and utilise some of it myself <3

Hey, babe! Oh man, you're making me melt! Thank you so much!

PFFFT such a great joke at such a bad time LASJDFLASFD

You're so sweet, ahhh, thank you!!! I'm really happy you enjoyed Sleuth Jesters and that moment, ahhh! One of my favorite things I've ever written!

[oceanspray5]

hello! i simply must know more about lockwood & co. i've seen a couple reblogged posts about it and it does look like something i'd vibe with, but is there anything you want to share in support of it? are there any characters you are particularly attached to? what are the vibes? i would simply love to learn more.

Ahhh I am HAPPY to ramble all about it. Honestly its hard to pick any ONE thing because everything is so good! Like it could easily have been a kids show but its not? The dialogue is so wonderfully written. The shots and cinematography is SO beautiful and artistic and there is so much care in the craft that its been getting rave reviews from absolutely everyone! Critics, fans, general public? You name it.

The show is based on a book series by Jonathan Stroud. Basically its zombie apocalypse where you have to fight the zombies but instead of zombies its ghosts and the only one who can actually see/hear/feel the zombies are children-teens but the danger they pose is to everyone in society as a whole! The vibe is slightly spooky but so completely cozy. Its very hard to describe but it blends the two very well! Its a show I can rewatch again and again and always find something new or not get bored of. Its just that well made and easy to rewatch (and getting me to rewatch 1 thing twice within the same year isn't the easiest task lol).

All the characters are amazing but especially the main trio! They're my perfect blorbos. They're all traumatized weirdos and the best found family and if you're looking for a ship to fall in love with Lockwood and Lucy are so repressed and SO in love and the slow burn is amazing but doesn't feel like a slow burn cuz the intimacy between them is so perfect!!

Also! One thing I absolutely LOVE about the show is its emphasis on friendship not being lesser of a priority than romantic love. George is so important as a character. He's not just the third wheel to Lockwood and Lucy and they show that in such a clear way and its really cool cuz i haven't seen many other shows do that.

The actors are all so amazingly talented. I love them so much. If you go down my blog you'll see its mostly Lockwood and Co and locklyle gifsets! I definitely say its worth it. I put it on casually one day as something to unwind to after a long day and immediately got obsessed! Another thing I have to say is the show takes place at night mostly but you can SEE STUFF! It's not Game of Thrones S8 levels of dark screen. Everything is visible and so very clear. The colors in this show are especially beautiful and used very nicely to add to the storytelling.

This got a little long (can you tell I love the show and can ramble so much more about it if given the chance too? Lol). But if you have any more questions or wanna know more about the show in general hit me up! Or if you decide to watch it and whatever you think about it, I'd love to hear whatever you have to say!

[perexcri]

Hello!!! You said you have been reading a lot of aus, could you please tell us about your favourite ones?

ahhh hello!! i would love to, because i've been really enjoying aus lately :D i haven't been reading as much fic as in the past because i've been trying to get through some books on my tbr list (of which there are too many, though i did finish one today!), but when i have been reading fics, it's been aus mainly!!

like i said in the other ask, you can always feel free to check out my bookmarks on ao3!! but here are a few of my current favs:

[hiding beneath the cut because it got way too long :) ]

tip-toeing on lily-pads by my beloved @cherryisgone. you might think i'm biased because it was given to me, and you would be correct in thinking that, but also, it's just?? so good?? the pining is off the charts, plus it's a kind of princess and the frog concept with prince Will and knight Mike. the writing is beautiful and has this lovely water imagery woven throughout it that i absolutely adored. idk what more someone could ask for tbh (except maybe a pt. 2 👀👉🏻👈🏻)

a new fight series by tea_for_one_please. this is a wonderful star wars au that does a fantastic job of weaving the main party members into the star wars universe and lore. i read it intermittently while i was visiting friends last month and really enjoyed my time with it. also, it's so well-written that i didn't realize how long the whole series was? apparently the entire series is the length of a book and i just. didn't know this until a few days ago lol. so yes, this one's fun for star wars/sci-fi vibes!!

fireball him! (cast protection) by @willow-lark. i'm a sucker for fantasy aus and this one is soooo so good!! again, maybe i'm biased because one of my stories is listed as inspiration, but i loved this thing. i saw it was posted last week while i was at work, and the second i got to take my lunch break, i flopped onto my couch to read it and was not disappointed. wonderful writing and an ending that left me with my jaw dropped. not that i'm still thinking about it :')

the manuscript by whereyouare. i'm humbly begging everyone to read this one because it's premise is just too good to pass up. it's an au where there's no Upside Down/supernatural stuff from the actual show. Will is a sci-fi author, and his publisher tells him his upcoming book is too cynical and the ending needs to be changed. it's such an interesting study of Will and refreshing take on his character, mostly because he's just...so cynical in this one? idk, maybe that's not for everyone, but i've enjoyed seeing a potential future Will where living in a small town and being in love with his (supposedly) straight best friend have hardened him more. it's fascinating and fun, so i highly recommend it!

warm by @notebooknonbinary. this one's a short fantasy au, but it's so sweet and soft. like i said, i'm a sucker for fantasy aus and have been writing with them a lot lately, so i always enjoy when i find a good one, and this one definitely fits the bill!

daydream by disaster_energy. this is a really fun d&d au where Will gets chosen by the moon goddess and Mike chooses to pledge to her paladin order. i especially loved the world-building in this one because it kinda reminded me of the percy jackson series - it was a perfect melding of a fantasy world with a modern one. plus it had plenty of pining, and i'll never complain about that lol

the vale of shadows by sevensided. another fantasy au!! this is the third installment in the dark mirror trilogy, which is one of my favorite things i've read ever in my life, fic or otherwise. i'm in love with this third installment and the recent update it got - the most recent 4 chapters have the perfect cottagecore vibes that made me melt. i love this whole series with all of my heart, and i'm so glad to see it in a fantasy au setting now

and it's not byler, but just for grins and giggles, i'm once again gonna rec sevensided's ronance one shot, nothing sacred / all things wild. i love this author's writing style, and she takes such an intense and interesting approach with these two characters by putting them in an FBI setting: Nancy is an agent recovering from a particularly traumatic mission, and Robin is her psychologist. they have a conversation and. well. Things Happen.

idk if you're specifically looking for recs anon, but if you're interested, i also have 2 fantasy aus and a vampire au i posted a few weeks ago!! they're some of my favorite things i've written and posted, and i really liked how the writing came out in them, so if you're interested, here they are:

fantasy aus: A Flower That Resembles You, the truth beneath the rose

vampire au: come to me again (in the cold, cold night)

happy reading!! if you have any recs, feel free to send some my way - i go through phases where i'll read more books than fic and vice versa, so it's only a matter of time until i'm glued to my phone burning through fics again lol

thanks for the ask, and thank you to all the lovely authors for creating such wonderful works for us to enjoy :D 💜💜💜

[softquietsteadylove]

Maybe this has a new AU potential? :)

Photographer Gil and Model Thena. But it’s Thena who falls in love first!

Gil is the best photographer and very popular so Thenas agency got lucky and managed to book an photoshooting for 2 days!

I really enjoy your work so a big thank you! ❤️

Thena flipped her hair in the other direction as the flashes continued to bombard and surround her. She angled this way, angled that, pursed her lips, lidded her eyes slightly--everything they always asked of her.

"That's perfect, Thena," the photographer - not even clicking the shutter, just letting it roll - drawled at her. His praise was as empty as her interest in this shoot. "You're doing amazing, sweetie."

"Ahhh, I've seen you do better."

Thena's eyes sparked at the increasingly familiar voice. She had only worked with him a few times by this point, but she had to admit that he was at least better than the hack currently at the helm. "This is a closed set, you know."

"I do know," he walked forward, out of the shadows and towards the blinding lights focused on her. "I'm taking over."

Thena just barely bit back her excitement at that.

"That may be, but we're not exactly done here," the current photographer stated, pulling his camera - and the photos he'd taken thus far - into him defensively.

"Oh, I think you are," Gilgamesh shrugged his stupidly wide shoulders as he dropped off his own camera bag. "You're doing her an injustice--is what you're doing. If I saw these proofs I'd ask for my money back, man."

"Excuse m-?!"

"Come on," he rolled his eyes as he started adjusting his lens and settings. He waved vaguely at the current set up, "you're washing her out, you spent no time thinking about how to light her properly, you're not even showcasing the product well."

"She is the product!"

"She's not for sale," Gilgamesh snapped back at the other photographer. "She may be the canvas, but you're doing a terrible job as the artist, so beat it."

Thena dropped her arms to her sides, letting her hair fall as it pleased around her shoulders. She was stiff from holding herself in the same three poses for the last hour. The previous photographer left in a huff, barely packing up the equipment he'd brought with him. If he hadn't been so boring and annoying, maybe she would feel bad.

Gilgamesh tilted his head at her as he walked into the lit space to move things around. "You've had a fun morning, huh?"

Thena shrugged, watching as he picked up entire light stands - sandbags and all - and moved them back. At least she wouldn't be roasting alive anymore. "Not everyone has your charm, Gil. He's just doing what's familiar to him, which is taking pictures of stationary objects."

Gil paused in his rearranging to give her a grin, "you think I'm charming?"

Thena paused just a second in their banter. One agonising second. "I said you had charm, not that it worked on me."

"Sure thing," he chuckled, opening up the barn doors on a few of the stronger lights to spread out their spill. "And that's his own fault if he's going to lie on his portfolio. Product photography doesn't mean you're ready for model stuff, even if you do take your friends' instagram pics."

Thena was happy to watch him work, adjusting the dress - one of many she would be wearing over the span of the weekend - spilling around her. "I have no problem being a stationary object if it means I get to sit down."

Gil found it funny that she often suggested she was lazy, even though she was one of the most booked models in their line of work. He would know; he was also highly sought after. "Thena."

She looked at him, although the way he was looking at her made her want to look away again. She was a model--she was used to being looked at. It was her job to be beautiful, and to be admired for that beauty. But something about Gilgamesh was different.

"You are not an object," he said softly, and in a way that was more honest than anything her co-workers could ever even attempt. He walked over to her again, sorting out some of her tousled hair, "stationary or not."

He stepped back to his camera, but that gave her the opportunity to try not to look flustered.

He sat down and pulled his camera into his lap, although not up to his eye. Gil preferred a very natural method of capturing his photos. Whether she had meant to say it or not, he was charming, and he was good at using that to encourage his subjects into a more relaxed rhythm.

"What have you been up to?" Thena began, having learned since her first few times working with Gil that he always started off his shoots with some light and easy conversation. She had fought it tooth and nail the first time, but there was something so personable about him.

"Mm, a lot of company work," he mumbled as he clicked through his camera settings, looking up at her and down again repeatedly. "Some food shoots."

"Do you get to eat the food?"

"No, a lot of it is faked to make it actually look good."

"That seems like a rip off."

Gil laughed, and damn if it didn't make her want to laugh too. It was so infectious.

Thena smiled. "I saw the stuff you did for Vanity. It was good."

"You think so?" he grinned, snapping a picture in the middle of their conversation.

She nodded. She was still just sitting the way she naturally would, folded up slightly over herself, legs crossed and hunching her shoulders. But he hadn't corrected her posture yet.

"It was kinda boring, though," he lamented, snapping another picture.

"Oh?"

He shrugged, stretching his legs out in front of him. "They're not as fun to talk to."

"As fun as...?" Thena lifted a carefully shaped eyebrow at him.

"As you."

"Lying to my face?"

"No lie," he denied, sitting back slightly in the chair next to the unused tripod. "I think our talks are fun."

"I feel a little puppeted when you say it like that," she murmured, looking down at her neutral painted toenails stretched out in front of her.

"Not a puppet," he laughed as he snapped another picture. "Maybe like a doll?--or one of those birds that can talk?"

Thena's jaw dropped at the playful jab, although she was undeniably smiling (it was pretty funny, she could admit). "I could demand a new photographer."

"I don't think so, they're paying me top dollar for the whole weekend," Gil grinned at her as he switched tactics, attaching his camera to the tripod and setting its auto timer. "You're stuck with me."

"Stuck with a photographer who thinks of me as a parrot?" Thena gave him another unimpressed glance as she stood as well, brushing the dress off and sorting out its layered and breezy skirts. She barely noticed the camera taking pictures at its timed intervals.

"A pretty one." Thena laughed at the lazy amendment. "There it is!"

"What?" she looked at him past the lights, tucking back one side of her hair, the way she liked.

"You have a great laugh," Gil said more gently, under the room's AC and the hum of the massive lights and the snap of his lens. He leaned to look at some of the pictures he was taking passively. "You can really feel it through the lens."

Thena rolled her eyes briefly. Gil never directed her on how to pose or stand or move in these shoots, leaving her somewhat idle. "Well, that is certainly part of the job--for people to feel my laugh?"

"It's my job, actually," he corrected her liberally, enjoying the way she looked annoyed with him for just a second. "I may be taking some pictures of a dress, but the actual point of photography is to capture the feeling of a moment. The vibe, or emotion, or whatever is happening in that split second."

"Poetic," she murmured, walking around the simple stand on which she had been seated before. If Gil wasn't going to tell her what to do then she would just pace around until he did.

"My job is capture the subject at its best, right?" he continued, even moving into the space to remove the stupid wooden block. "And I think your best is when you're relaxed, maybe even having a little fun?"

She had a regretful amount of fun when she was with him. It made the rest of her work grating and tiresome in his absence. "I thought you said I wasn't an object."

"You're not an object, or the product," he said softly, finally moving to direct her or position her or something. "But you are the subject. I don't think it would matter if you weren't; no one would be able to look at anything else anyway."

Thena kept her eyes on him as he held out his hand, letting her guide herself to him. He moved her gently, as if her were leading her in a dance. He watched the lights and shadows, testing where was the best position for them--for her.

Gil scrunched his mouth just a little, "they don't need to put this much makeup on you."

Thena shrugged, "part of the job."

Gil finally found the spot where he wanted her, somewhat at an angle to the camera, but not exactly in profile either. "The next dress has a totally different vibe to it. I'll tell them to give you the 'no makeup' look."

Which of course, still required makeup, just that it look like she didn't have any.

Thena's hand slipped out of his slowly, their fingers clinging to each other. She pulled her hand back to herself slowly until she could fold her hands together again. "Here?"

He shrugged, going back to the display screen on his camera. "It's not like you have a bad side."

Her smile grew again. "The dress might."

"I don't even like this dress."

Thena's laugh bubbled out of her before she could stop it. She looked somewhat over her shoulder at him again, "what?"

"Yeah, it's-" Gil waved his fingers in the air, "I dunno--silly."

She raised both brows at him, "it's silly?"

"No regular person would wear this," he gestured towards her.

"What's wrong with it?"

"It's impractical!"

"It's a dress!"

"Would you wear it?"

Thena pursed her lips; he had her there. "Maybe not in the everyday."

"The dress looks like it's half of one dress and then they forgot to make the bottom half," Gil moved his hands to gesture accordingly, making her laugh more. "And then they went, 'oh, we forgot, just take one square of all these other dresses and add them on the bottom' and that was that."

Thena dabbed at the corners of her eyes to make sure her makeup was undisturbed. She shook her head at him, "you're terrible."

"Better than that dress."

"Is that why you're photographing the back of it?" she asked back at him again until finally he nodded her back over to him. She fluffed the breezy fabric around her as she walked. He was right, it did look like a strip of the dress was missing and had been filled in with whatever curtains they had lying around.

"It's a 3/4 at most," he brushed off, clicking through his gallery to show her the photo on which he had decided. "This is the one."

It was a beautiful photo. It showcased the dress' best features while underplaying the odd structure of it. And she looked...she looked like she had never been happier.

"Well?" he looked at her almost eagerly, "what do you think?"

Thena found herself nearly nose to nose with him before taking a long step back. She tucked her hair back again, "I'm not the client, nor the one who hired you. I don't think it matters."

Gil shrugged blithely, uncaring of her dismissal. "It's a picture of you, I want to know what you think."

Thena sighed. It was a beautiful photo. The photograph made her feel beautiful. And he was right--she could practically hear her laughter in picture. She looked down at the dress as she smoothed down the bodice, "it's a lovely photograph, Gilgamesh."

"The first of many," he promised as he set aside his camera and stretched. He had achieved in twenty minutes what Tony hadn't been able to do in an hour straight of nonstop clicking. "I'm hungry--you?"

"Starved."

"I guess that's a given," Gil said mostly to himself, although Thena still heard him and slapped him on the arm for it. "Delivery lunch?"

"Anything," she let out in a sigh, her posture sagging again. She wandered out from under the lights. Once she didn't have actual thousands upon thousands of watts aimed at her it was a little chilly in the air conditioned loft space.

Gil laid her robe over her bare shoulders gently, "you get comfortable. We'll break for lunch and try the second dress on when hair and makeup comes in for the afternoon."

Thena could have thanked him, but he was already wandering to the other end of the open space, scrolling through various delivery apps for options.

[suspendedinbush]

hiiihihihihi hiii youuuu simmy my beloved loml you i juuust watched howl's moving castle for the first time tday (ik appalling srry) but the entire tim i was thinkinng abt you my beloved and now i want to know abt yr r/s au <33 as much details as you dont mind saying pls <333 bc i was thinking like it would actually!! work sooo well for them ike r being not that conventionally attractive , and growing old w/a big nose while s still finds him just soooo pretty and also being dramatically vian himself AND swallowing! a STAR! and having a heavy heart that belongs to remus like itys sooooo it fits sooo well, but Also howl being a welshman is making me think it could work either way too! esp w/the turning into a crow thing paralleling werewolf tranforms and sirius instead being the son of a mother who would sell him out like sophie im!!!!!! i also know yr basing the au sorta on the book so im wondering which roles ud see fit instead! but aah im just my brain is so abuzz im so excited for whatever u plan to do however u plan to do it! this got wayy too long srry love u MWAH

LAYLA OMG!! firstly hi hi hi hello love <33 SECOND YOU WATCHED IT!!! ahhh having a little party in celebration also tell me everything what did you think??? (i'm running into your inbox right now just so you know!) and you thought of me…literally handing you my heart on a silver platter!! MWAH yours forever <333

also okay the au… (under the cut because minor spoilers and also this is so fucking long)

it definitely started as like taking direct inspiration from the book with a few nods to the movie (like the walking on air scene because obviously) but it’s evolved a lot in the past months mostly because i felt that my sophie-remus wasn’t remus enough and needed a more remus-like journey and destination in the story (not sure any of this will make sense with absolutely no context about what i’ve actually written), and then adapting the story to fit r/s more in tone (i.e the war, queerness, rejection from society etc) i got carried away and things have expanded a lot. i would still say a lot more book inspiration than movie, stuff like michael's character (rather than markl) and the minor details that the movie brushed over, like sophie’s sisters & fanny & the ben sullivan+prince justin story line, i’ve kept from the book but there are definitely some things that i knew i would change that directly contradict:

firstly and the MOST crucial detail for me, remus isn’t secretly pretty all along!! like this is the thesis of the entire au actually, it’s not an ugly duckling arc! he doesn’t break the curse to be young and beautiful again but with more self-confidence, he’s just not conventionally attractive full stop. he’s plain if not ‘ugly’ and in no way particularly impressive, he’s only 18 and hasn’t even allowed himself the space to start figuring shit out. sirius falls in love with him while he’s old with no knowledge of what remus really looks like because knowing that appearance just wasn’t even a factor in s desiring and falling for him revolutionises remus’s view of himself and his assumptions about who sirius is and also…

sirius as howl is not really that vain! this might be a spoiler, but i'd say one of the big theme’s in the au is that everyone is lying and no-one is who they appear to be and/or especially who they SAY they are and it’s remus’s assumption that sirius cares a lot about looks and would only fall in love with someone equally beautiful. howl’s vanity & concern for his looks makes sense for book howl and that story, but i wanted them to be more r/s than howl and sophie so in the au sirius’s flashy clothes and hours spent in the bathroom are more about self-expression, queerness and non-conformity, the contrast of remus struggling with otherness, not fitting in and his failed masculinity (poor baby is too sickly for the draft :/ ) and sirius being so extravagant, rocking the boat, rejecting expectations for his masculinity and flourishing—as in he literally builds a moving castle and lives on the fringes doing whatever he likes and running from/against authority (also should mention the working title for the au is 'Sirius Black’s Moving Castle for Misfits and Runaway Curse Victims').

in terms of roles i do feel like sirius is the natural howl but i did consider what r as howl would be like, i think there is something to work off with howl’s insecurity and one BIG trait being a slither-outer and a coward…very r if you ask me, but at the end of the day i don't think sirius as sophie works and remus-howl would change his character and role in the story by a lot to make it fit...

like howl’s personality by itself is sort of neither r nor s, there are similar and contradicting traits, the vanity and cowardice being the most un-sirius but (maybe a spoiler here) even in the book it’s up for interpretation how much these traits are really howl or instead a symptom of lacking a heart or even a deliberate front. so it was quite an easy adjustment in terms of sirius doing the same howl actions but with slightly different more sirius-like motivations, whereas for R as howl i don’t think you could get him to act the same way.

not sure that makes sense but i think the howl-sirius parallel works because his role in the story is much much more suited to S, like you could write an R-howl playing up the insecurity and the slither-outer trait but to me there isn’t really a story there, like where would it go…because howl is already very comfortable in his position outside polite society: he breaks convention ostentatiously, relishes in mainstream disapproval for standing out and enjoys and actively encourages his terrible reputation (for heart-eating, draft-dodging and other failings in his character). once you give reason for the apparent vanity and cowardice, howl as the prodigy who couldn’t care less about living up to expectations is perfect for sirius.

the thing about sophie's step-mother is that both dwj and miyazaki refuse to write antagonists without nuance, there isn't a clear villain like you WILL empathise with everybody—and with sophie’s step-mother especially, she’s worse in the book until she’s not! despite sophie being so lonely and unhappy at home, the story is about overcoming her own fatalistic worldview and internal feelings of worthlessness & inadequacy rather than an external battle. her family especially her sisters care a lot about her and do want the best for her even if it’s sometimes misguided but sophie has to learn to stand up for herself and stop putting everyone else first (hello martyr complex). AND there's a lot of repression (which goes to remus like water to a fish), even allowing herself to want things out of life, like it literally takes her being cursed to be an old woman and being so ashamed of her predicament and having no other choice for her to finally leave her suffocating home because she is so afraid of challenging the world head on (which is sort of antithetical to sirius).

so yeah then with sophie-sirius not working… like it’s possible to write her family and the hat shop to imitate the blacks but the problem for me is the characters themselves are basically opposites so you’d have to abandon one entirely and it would either be a completely different story to hmc or a completely different character to sirius… (also talking about the characters i mean book howl and sophie but i honestly can’t remember what’s different/missing in the movie??)

and really remus was ALWAYS the perfect sophie to me like in the wip he’s certain that in failing to be a strong, healthy, beautiful perfect specimen of a young man who can fight for the country, instead being sick, unattractive + the nebulous but undeniable fact of his queerness means there’s some innate monstrosity or wrongness about him, and being rejected by his peers has confirmed it, so he represses, withering away hiding in the dark and it’s a mixture of thinking ‘there is nothing better out there nor am i capable or deserving of any better, this is my lot in life and i’ll make do’ that keeps him there. UNTIL he’s forced to leave and comes across sirius who has made a life for himself on his own terms and on the outside seems to have everything: beauty, talent, confidence, freedom but is very flamboyantly throwing people’s admiration & acceptance (everything that remus covets) back in their faces.

in the story sophie is quite resentful of howl in a similar way remus is of sirius (here and in canon i think) and like sophie, he ‘knows’ that he’s a nobody with no future and just expects to fail. also the hat shop is much more remus’s natural environment, exhibit service worker R: ‘he was little more than a puppet in grey felt—marionette strings binding him tightly to the shop, a little flimsy and worn through in places from dancing around for customers all day long. A walking, talking, hat-fetching piece of furniture.’

sooo those are my thoughts on the casting obviously just my opinion and personal thoughts on r/s. oh and the turning into the crow thing and being corrupted by magic, it wasn’t in the book but i have incorporated it only with a different character…and someone turns into a dog also not sirius...other quick points about the wip: peter has a big part in this might be obvious who as but he’s so fun in this one, petunia is also a sympathetic character, Hope is long dead (as per), Lyall dies in the first few sentences and Andromeda has more lines than James i think. i didn’t use the whole multi-verse plot line from the book, we’re in an approximate uk somewhere between 1910s and 40s but it’s more a vibe than a time period because magic and wizards are well integrated with the culture, politics and technology etc, Market Chipping & The Waste are in the Scottish highlands (so Scottish Remus and Lily), Sirius is not from Wales unfortunately but someone does live there (also if ur interested in the book i would highly recommend listening to the audiobook to get the full of effect of Howl’s accent). and the star swallowing/giving away his heart!! it's a major plot point so i won’t say too much about that but THAT SCENE….the one with howl in the field with the shooting stars!! yeah i’m so so excited about it, it’s sooo fitting for what i have planned and only another reason why sirius just couldn’t NOT be howl!

[raylangivins]

Hello!

Your Top 5 favourite books ? Could be something that you've reread again & again or something so great that you read it once and would not go back to because it was so tragic etc?

Ahhh anon, I was actually already separately drafting a different list of books wot i like just because I feel I've been doing a lot of book hateratin' in my tags lately, so thank you for this!

In no particular order...

Station Eleven by Emily St. John Mandel: I think everyone's read this because it's a bestseller, but it really is that good. It snuck up on me when I first read it. I didn't really process how much I loved it until it was like months after I finished it and I was still thinking about it. I love the themes of how art and humanity go hand in hand, and how the human nature to create will persist. It's a really lovely message from, and one that feels more realistic to the real world than the general trends in post-apocalyptic stuff (which I tend to read a lot). I re-read this during lockdown season 1 because, given the uncomfortable similarities between this book and the early pandemic, I really wanted to connect with that message again. The TV adaptation is also incredible in its own right too.

Rebecca by Daphne du Maurier: I read this for the first time like last year and whether you know the story or not I cannot over-emphasise how much fun it is to read. The absolute adrenaline rush and second-hand embarrassment when Mrs de Winter gets ready for the costume party, and you know it's not gonna go well. Riveting! Horrible! No spoilers but when the reveal finally happened I felt like I'd just done a hit of cocaine. I've made a web-weaving post about this before, but elements of it reminded me so much of Phantom Thread. They're like the inverse of each other. Genuinely such a fun read.

Of Mice and Men by John Steinbeck: The only book I read in school that I actually liked. I remember I started reading the homework chapters on the train home from school one day and was so absorbed I kept reading it as I walked home like Belle in Beauty and the Beast, and then I kept reading it when I got home and didn't even eat lunch I was so enraptured, and then my mam came home and found me sobbing at the kitchen table because I'd just finished it, and she was panicking like "what happened?" and I'm like "Lennie just wanted to pet some rabbit 😭😭😭"

The Book Thief by Markus Zusak: My childhood favourite. This book is sooooo beautiful. Really brutal, but I'm really glad I read this as a kid, because I think, while adults can still appreciate it, childhood is when this one really hits. Absolutely gorgeous writing. The POV coming from Death Personified is still absolutely genius to me. Another one that I binged (at a sleepover at my childhood best friends house) only to be caught sobbing at the end.

Sharp Objects by Gillian Flynn: My fave of Flynn's that I've read. Gone Girl is fun but this one is just visceral. The sense of suspense and discomfort in every word of this is so palpable. Thee literal definition of a thriller. There were parts that genuinely made me flinch, but I simply could not look away.

Honorary mentions:

I always really love everything Jon Ronson writes, though idk if I'd ever call any of them my favourites. I think he has a really amazing way of getting horrific people to say the quiet part out loud, and not even realise they're doing it. His books are always so funny. Them and So You've Been Publicly Shamed are my faves among his work. His podcast series called The Last Days of August is also really good.

I'd be remiss if I didn't mention them raven cycle books because Adam Parrish is my son. I raised him. Not my favourite books except for all the ways in which they are.

Territory of Light by Yuko Tsushima: I don't know if I'd call this a favourite either, but I always recommend it to people because it's short and easy, and I don't think many people have heard of it. I picked it up on a whim when I was in a reading slump, and I just loved the way the atmosphere is built up. It also plays around with how love and resentment can coexist within a relationship, which is a theme I personally love dearly.

[youremyonlyhope]

I should have known that after finding out that Jesper is mixed the same way I am (Zemeni aka Black mother and Kaelish aka Irish father) that anything about his backstory would hit me very hard.

Did not think I’d cry over it though. Yet here I am.

[bukojuiice]

rose-colored boy

ೃ pairing: (eren jaeger x fem! reader)

ೃ  tags: college/modern au, fluff, humor, love at first sight cliché, mikasa is your cute little sister, armin, sasha, jean, and connie are your besties, and eren is a himbo who works hard and has terrible friends.

ೃ warnings: strong language and mild suggestive content

ೃ part 1/??? of my (eren x reader) college au!

ೃ word count: 3000 words

ೃ  my nav  →  my mha writing masterlist 

ೃ This is my very first snk x reader fic! so i hope you bear with some errors! qwq 

i’ve been following the anime ever since it was released in 2013, and this is the first time i’m  going to be writing for it.  this month’s manga chapter really took me out so why not channel my sadness thru writing an fluff! eren fic? 🤧 i hope you enjoy either way!

ೃ  please do reblog if you enjoyed!! (feel free to add tags too because i love reading them and my heart swells with happiness when people love my work!)

ೃ  in which (Y/N) (L/N), 20, still in school, and regretfully-unregretfully-her little girl scout sister's assistant, meets eren jaeger in an embarrassing too innocent door-to-door cookie sale whilst a humiliating party was going on.

cookies, suspicious maybe-maybe-not pot brownies, meddling little sisters and friends, “oh my god they were roommates” vine on replay 24/7, homework, tears, and fairy lights bring them together.

“I’m going to enter now.”

“Ahhh yes, please!”

“Shut up, please.” Eren muttered to himself as he tossed and turned around in his bed, but still couldn’t get to sleep. “When will they ever stop doing this?” Why did Eren’s next-door roommate and his girlfriend have to do this five times a day? They had a lot of stamina for 21-year-olds who didn’t have anything better to do.

Eren’s thoughts eventually brought him to his parents.

His parents- did they even exist?

For pretty much 14 years of Eren’s life, they had been out of town or out of the country. His older brother, Zeke, blonde, bespectacled, tall, and sometimes too far up his own ass older brother who Eren is able to confide in from time to time, recently got a girlfriend whom he’s hopelessly in love with (they’re even thinking about getting married which isn’t really a problem since the girl is genuinely nice to his older brother so Eren is good with her.), so… things in the family had been a bit rough and busy to say the least.

Communication with his parents wasn’t always the best.

Eren would study late at night back when he was seven, because no one bothered to help him with homework. Along with the fact that he wasn’t the brightest kid in class, and he knew that very well, but he had ambition and he was determined to make it big in the world. He focused more on sports, particularly Soccer in middle school and high school, and tried to balance that with his studies.  After being granted a Sports Scholarship from Shigashina University, Eren decided to rent and share a flat, living with his batchmates who he met at a mixer party (before Uni started as this whole meet and get to know each other kind of thing) and whom he was so quick to call his ‘friends’, just so that he could get out of the hellhole that was his own house.

But things turned out much worse than expected.

Eren thought that the ‘College Life’ was to focus more on pursuing your future career and make a name for yourself but… it was the other way around.

He thought that after Freshmen year, everyone would take things seriously. Sure, have some drinks, get wasted after finals, or have house parties from time to time. But he was unfortunately, dragged into the wrong crowd. After attending around 5 parties in the first few months of being generalized as one of the infamous and pompous freshman archetypes present in every university, he called it a year and spent the rest of his nights doing homework, projects, playing video games, staying at the school soccer field until 10PM while his roommates were probably smoking crack and not caring about the number of units they needed to take for each of their goddamn subjects.

 He was ~living the life~ and now that he regrets most of the decisions he made in freshman year, the only option that he has left was to wait until his third year and move to a different apartment.  

 Now, here he was, Sophomore year, nearing the end of the semester, and very much eager to get the hell out of here and also study for his upcoming finals on Constitutional Law II, as his professor, Mr. Erwin Smith, was going to throw hands if one of his students score below average on the exam.

 “EREN MICK JAEGER! BROOOO!” Eren winces when he hears the shrieky and annoying voice of his flatmate Thomas Wagner, calling out to him. “Wanna go and party with us?” Eren smiles halfheartedly, shaking his head, “Ah, no thanks. I have a game tomorrow and finals coming up on Thursday.” Thomas smirked and wrapped his arm around Eren, “Oh fuck that, live the college life ya spoon.”

“No, really I have to study.”

Thomas frowned and groaned, “Oh god, you’re such a killjoy. Fine, if that’s what you want. Don’t blame us if we tell you to buy some beer down the block.”

Eren cracked an obviously fake laugh and pushed Thomas away from him, “You’re an ass. That only happened once and that was when we first met. Don’t you even dare try to ask me to buy you shit again.”

“Woah. Woah. Woaaaaaah. That was a joke Eren. Loosen up will you?” Thomas raises an eyebrow, clearly taken aback by the brunette’s sudden aggressiveness. He hums Moves like Jaeger by Maroon 5 as a way to spite Eren whilst passing by him down the staircase.

The brunette shook his head, tying his hair into a bun carelessly and sprinting into his room without uttering another word.

Eren just wanted to study. He really did.

Instead, his roommates, all of them, mind you, were all partying in the lounge and the music was too loud and Eren was too annoyed.

They did manage to bring him out and make him stay in the kitchen where he mindlessly glared at anyone who came in. He sighed and tapped his pen restlessly amongst the insane amount of books on the table.

There was a knock.

His roommate, Floch, came in the kitchen with his girlfriend who Eren couldn’t even name with all the women he has brought into the apartment. She was hanging onto his arm and giggling. Floch’s eyes were red and his speech very slow and lazy. "Eren!" he said with a sly grin.

Eren raised an eyebrow, shooting him an irritated look. "What now Floch? Are you here to tell me to take a shot again?" The ginger-haired’s girlfriend giggled once again and kissed Floch’s cheek. Floch laughed and swatted her away, though he missed by a long shot. "Someone's at the door," a thumb pointing to the den. "wouldchumind ge'in it?" another giggle. The girl nodded sloshily. "Yesss! Erenieee get 'em door, please. Be a dearrrrr."

Eren frowned and stared at them menacingly, earning no reaction from the two as they were mad drunk. "You were just in the den," Floch’s eyes widened. "My lovey wovey-we was in the den?" His girlfriend’s mouth went into an O. "Di'nt notice tha'!"

Eren sighed and stood up. He miraculously got through the throng of bodies and to the front door. "Yes?" he called out exasperated, not knowing who was outside.

"Do you want cookies?"

Eren turned and looked to see a little raven-haired girl, a girl scout no less, a blonde-haired boy pulling on a trolley who looked significantly shorter than him, wearing rimmed glasses, and an overall appearance whom his “friends” would immediately label as a nerd they had to be a few feet away from if they saw him and lastly, a girl who looked very tired and very done with life.

Beautiful (h/c)-colored hair, her eyes looked like the starry night sky, twinkling as he catches her gaze and a smile that looked forced, but warm all the same.  

A girl who was just absolutely fucking gorgeous.

Eren was captivated. His heart was beating like crazy and he could feel his ears turn red. He would make a fool of himself if he looked red as a tomato right now.

"Um," The girl peeked inside and grimaced, squeezing the hand that was her little sister's shoulder and catching Eren’s gaze. "Mikasa, I don't think these kinds of guys would want cookies."

“Unless they're pot cookies,” Eren almost said. Mikasa pouted and widened her eyes at Eren.

The older girl crouched down and frantically covered her little sister’s eyes. "Nopenopenope, Mi, don't pull that on him."

"But (Y/N)!"

(Y/N).

Her name was (Y/N).

Eren smiled sincerely (for the first time today) and leaned back inside to the drawer by the door to grab the extra cash he and his roommates put there for emergency pizza and stuff. "You know what? You're absolutely brilliant at selling cookies. I'll take one."

Mikasa smiled back at him cheekily and tugged her older sister’s hand. "See, (Y/N)?! He wants some! Go get 'em!”

The raven-haired girl then turned to the blonde teen, practically jumping up and down. “Armin look! We sold another one!"

“We did!” The boy who was apparently named Armin, clapped his hands together, then gave the little girl a high five. “You’re a natural at this Mikasa!”

(Y/N) looked at Eren, then Mikasa, and sighed. She grabbed a bag from the trolley Armin was dragging around and pulled out a box of cookies. Eren grabbed them slowly from her, their hands almost touching as he gave (Y/N) a small smile. The (h/c) girl blushed lightly, though not visible enough for the brunette to notice.

"Hope to see you again!" Eren called out when the siblings said their thank you's and bid farewell.

And, this time, even for the slightest moment, Eren’s serotonin levels were going straight through the roof. His heart was still beating loudly, almost in sync with the trash music his roommates were blaring on the speakers. and for a moment, even just for a moment. 

He felt genuine happiness that he hasn’t felt in a very long time.

 The three of you continue to walk animatedly, now that the coast was clear and the guy from earlier wasn’t within earshot, your blonde friend just had to break the silence.

 Armin smiles, pushing his glasses up to the crook of his nose. “(Y/N), you did see how he looked at you right?” The blonde chuckles softly, catching his best friend off guard.

 You blinked. “Him?” You try to stop yourself from smiling, blushing profusely. “Geez Armin, I don’t even know his name yet.”

 “I’ll bet you 100 bucks that he goes to our Uni.”

 “Even if he does, it’s not like we’ll talk to him or anything. Judging from the place he lives in and the people he was hanging out with, we’re in two completely different worlds.” You shook your head in denial, holding Mikasa’s hand, your interlocked arms swinging playfully. Armin gives you a knowing look in response.

 Mikasa continued to wave back at the boy whom they had just sold cookies too. (Y/N) looked over her shoulder and smiled. “Wasn’t he nice (Y/N)?” Mikasa asks her older sister. (Y/N) returned her sister a small smile, “He was.”

 "I hope we see him again!"

"I'm sure we will."

 The day of Eren’s dreaded finals finally arrive.

He has prepared tirelessly for this. Hours upon hours of hard work. But, before he finally gets his well-deserved sleep, he has a few more hours to cram and absorb more knowledge for his exams.

So, what better way to do so than head straight to the library as soon as it opens at 6 AM?

This time, no one was going to bother him. No annoying roommates and no distractions.

Eren heads over to a table near the coffee and snack machines. He puts down his bag on a seat next to him, and begins to study once again. Looking through the course materials and the lessons that he still didn’t quite understand. Eren was so absorbed with studying and relying on his gut feeling that no other student in this university would think of going to the library at 6 AM on the day of finals… then he’s wrong. Very wrong. 

 “Sasha, should you even be eating mashed potato this early in the morning?” Armin asks the brunette worriedly, a huge tone of concern in his voice.

“Armin! Don’t chu worry! I ate heavy breakfast! Bacon, Eggs, and Toast! Did you not see me in the kitchen!?” She reassures her blonde friend, continuing to scoop up the mashed potato on a reusable cup.

“Liar.” Connie hissed, narrowing his eyes. “I was awake since 4 AM. Not once did I see you sneak into the kitchen until (Y/N) woke you up.”

“Atatata. Can we… stop with the negative vibes for a second?” Jean tries to become the mediator by holding his hands up against his two friends who were about to start an argument. “It’s finals week. We have to keep a clear mind, body and soul-“

“Jean, you know that’s BS.” You yawn widely, still practically half-asleep.

“Oh, come on! Can’t you just let me be positive just this once!? If we fail this exam I’m going to blame you!“

The five of you continue to talk mindlessly on the way to the library. Connie pushes the glass door open, very much excited to have this huge library all to yourselves.

Until…

There was someone already there.

Your eyes immediately come into contact with Eren’s. His radiant jade eyes staring into yours, mouth practically agape, his hands holding on to wooden chopsticks as the hot air of instant ramen breezes through his face.

“Oh?” Connie blinks. “Guess we aren’t the first ones here then.” He whistles.

“(Y/N)!” Armin nudges you in the arm in an attempt to tease you. “Guess your wish came true huh? We did see him again! By himself too!”

“W-what am I supposed to do exactly?” You turn to Armin, speaking in a hushed whisper.  

“Say thank you to him! Offer him to go on a boba date or something!”

“You got the Sasha seal of approval (Y/N)! He’s hot!” Sasha motions you a thumbs up and you can’t help but feel yourself already wanting to die of embarrassment.

The four of them slightly push you towards his table. With your friends cornering you like this, there was no way of escaping this.

All you had to do was talk to him and properly thank him for buying cookies from your little sister.

That was it.

No need for any extra ad-libs or poor and bad attempts of flirtation.

Just thank him (Y/N).

You can do this.

You breathe a hefty sigh then approach his table with confidence. The brunette continues to look up at you whilst turning the page of his reviewer that he wasn’t even looking at.

“Hi again! I just wanted to thank you properly for helping my sister and I, out the other day. Mikasa really appreciated the gesture you did for her, and she couldn’t stop talking about you to our parents since we saw you. You see, none of the other girl scouts want to be paired up with my sister because they think she’s an emotionless and monotonous freak. They’re really mean to her but she really wants to continue being a girl scout so my friend and I accompany her whenever she has to sell cookies!”

“It’s N-no problem!” Eren quickly replies, running a hand through his hair. “Why would they say such horrible things to your sister like that? Judging from the way she acted in front of me, she was quite the opposite. In a positive way of course! Those kids are just assholes who are intimidated because another girl their age is seemingly better than them.”

You giggle in response. “Thank you. I’ll tell Mikasa that you said that!” 

There was short silence for a few seconds until you realized that you forgot to say something. 

“Ah! I’m (Y/N) (L/N) by the way!”

“Eren.” He smiles, reaching his hand out to you for you to shake. You grip his strong and calloused hand firmly, and Eren could feel his ears turning red again while you were about to blush as red as a tomato.

You hear your friends snickering in the background and you took this as a sign to go back to your table. “I guess, I’ll see you around campus?” You ask, tilting your head. For, you actually really wanted to see him again after this.

“Yea! I’ll be seeing you!” He grins widely, watching you leave where he was seated. His smile then envelops into a frown as soon as you went away then he goes back to studying.

“(Y/N)! (Y/N)!” Connie whispers loudly, calling you over by waving his hand. Why was this dunce being so painfully obvious? “Ask him if he’s looking for an apartment or if he wants to live with us!”

“Already!?” You ask in disbelief, a bit shocked by what Connie had just said. He scoots to the left, as you take a seat between him and Sasha. “Guys, you’ve known him for like… 3 minutes. Only Armin and I actually interacted with him before this.”

“He has to pass the vibe check first.” Jean shrugs, sipping on an iced expresso. “But, yeah, he does seem alright from a few feet away.”

“Come on (Y/N)! Ask him!” Sasha nods approvingly. “It’s weird that he’s studying alone like this while we’re in another table trying to remain unaware that he looks lonely as hell.”

“UMmMM… maybe he wants to study alone because that’s the only way he can focus? That’s a thing that normal people do, Sasha.” You remark sarcastically, trying to think up of more reasons to not approach him again.

Armin clears his throat, “Look, (Y/N), it won’t hurt to try right? Besides, don’t you feel a tiny bit sorry for him? He does seem lonely and you do have a crush on him so… more ways to interact with him right?”

Your shoulders slump and you breathe a defeated sigh. “Okay okay fine.” You make your way to Eren’s table again but before you do, you turn to your friends. “By the way, I don’t really have a crush on him just yet. I just find him cute okay?”

“Yeah yeah.” They say in unison as you continue to walk back to the brunette’s table.

“Hi again Eren!” You wave and try your best not to fumble or look painfully obvious that you were infatuated by him. He looks up and you try your best not to smile like a weirdo.

“Hm?” He hums.

“Would you like to come over to our table and study with us?”

To be continued.

[escapewithbts]

“Just Benefits?”(Part One) - Jungkook

————————————————

You stretched out your arms and shielded your tired eyes from the morning sunlight peaking through the curtain. Upon sitting up you noticed the space in the bed next to you was empty. You wrapped the sheet closer around your almost naked body as it had gotten colder without another human lying next to you radiating warmth. You rubbed your eyes and yawned before grabbing your phone from the nightstand. An array of text messages were waiting for you.

7:34am From Jungkook: Hey y/n

7:34am From Jungkook: Sorry I’m not there, I had an early meeting

7:34am From Jungkook: Stay as long as you like

7:45am From Jungkook: Also I just want to say I had a good time talking with you last night

You locked the phone without responding and pulled off the covers. Then you got out of the bed and searched the floor for something to put on over your underwear. You only had jeans and a blouse, so you opted for Jungkook's oversized black t shirt from last night and a pair of his shorts. They were massive on you but you were comfy. You picked up your pants and shirt off the floor and folded them neatly on the bed as memories from the night before appeared in your mind;

8:10pm from Jungkook: I had such a rough day. Want to come over?

8:10pm to Jungkook: I’m at work

8:11pm from Jungkook: Ok, after?

8:11pm to Jungkook: Sure. I’m off at 10.

8:12pm from Jungkook: I’ll be at the dorm, text when you get here so I can buzz you in

You sighed and clicked off your phone. This was the third night this week he asked you to come over and it was only Wednesday. You weren't necessarily complaining, it was better than going to your own apartment where you lived alone, but you couldn't help but wonder why he was asking so much.

You guys kind of had an unspoken arrangement; to spend the night at each other's places when the other felt stressed or in need of companionship. You would have sex, of course, sometimes cuddle a little bit after, and then go on about your days the next morning.

You had met through one of your close friends, Kim Namjoon. He was in the same band as Jungkook, the famous k-pop group BTS. You had known Jungkook through RM for years now, you wouldn't have said you were friends, but you were always friendly and liked hanging out with him in a group. This part of your relationship with Jungkook however was relatively new.

It had all started one night when you were hanging out at their place with all of them, watching movies and drinking... maybe a little too much. All the other guys had gone to bed, leaving you and Jungkook alone and tipsy. Jungkook had always been shy, just like you, so when the two of you ended up kissing on the couch it took you both by surprise. One thing lead to another and before you knew it you were both naked in his bed. The sex was good, no great, so great in fact that you both knew you wanted to keep having it. And that's what lead you to this unspoken agreement you had. That first time was months ago now, and the two of you hadn't even talked about the future, nor the present for that matter. You were enjoying each other's company and not putting any kind of label on it... but you knew that always seemed to end up in a mess.

After work, you drove straight to the boy's dorm, notifying Jungkook of your arrival via text. You pressed the call box and waited for the front door to open. Jungkook answered after just a few seconds. He was wearing an oversized black t shirt and boxers, his long black hair was tousled about his head, and his dark brown eyes looked tired, his cherubic face slightly puffy. You had to admit, he looked very sexy, yet also adorable, and it caused you to feel butterflies in your stomach. You ignored them.

  "y/n..." his big smile and your name in his soft voice made your knees weak, "I'm glad you're here."

You smiled at him slightly.

  "Is anyone else home?" you asked quietly.

  "Jimin and Namjoon-hyung, but they're asleep."

You nodded in response and he stepped closer to you, pinning you against the now closed front door. He wrapped his long arms around your waist and buried his face in your neck, kissing your weak spot. It made you moan. How could he do that so quickly? You felt him smile against your skin and it sent a shiver down your spine.

  He took your hand and lead you down the hallway to his bedroom. It was basically a routine now. As soon as he shut the door, you were pulling off each other's clothes, kissing passionately between each layer removed. You never got tired of looking at him naked; his perfectly toned arms and thighs, his six pack and deep v hip muscles, the sleeve of tattoos that lined his hand and arm. He had a beautiful body, and that was something you had no problem admitting to yourself.

For being the youngest member in the group, he sure knew what he was doing. He was extremely shy on the surface, but that all disappeared in bed.

When you both had finished (you multiple times thanks to Jungkook), he laid down behind you and wrapped an arm around your waist and the other under your head, like a big spoon and little spoon. He lazily ran his fingertips along your bare side and it gave you goosebumps.

  "You've asked me here a lot this week," you stated matter-of-factually.

You felt him sigh softly.

   "Yeah, work's been kind of tough."

You traced the purple heart tattoo on his hand with your finger gently, then moved to the ARMY symbol to do the same.

   "I'm sorry."

You wanted to know more, but you didn't want to pry.

He sighed again and buried his face in your messy hair.

   "Your hair smells so nice." he said muffled.

You smiled.

  "Thanks."

There was a pause before he spoke again.

"Plus, I like having you here. In my bed."

That made your heart skip a beat, but you had to ignore it.

"I like being in your bed." you replied shyly.

He scooted himself closer to you, if that was even possible, so close that you could feel his pounding heart in the middle of your back.

"Um.. h-how was your day?" he questioned.

The two of you didn't usually talk much after, hardly at all actually, but this was nice.

"It was okay. Just went to work. Pretty uneventful," you shrugged, "How was yours?"

Jungkook removed his arm from under you and turned so he was lying on his back, his arm resting under his head. You did the same.

"Aishh, it was okay. It's been a little stressful lately. It's different with everything that's been going on. We haven't even really experienced anything like it, obviously."

You nodded in understanding.

"But.. you still enjoy it?" you couldn't help but wonder out loud.

He ran a hand through his messy hair.

   "Yes, I love it. I get to work with my 6 hyungs every day. But..." he paused, "It's hard sometimes, too. We are constantly busy, constantly booked. Album after album, performance after performance, always filming something, doing press, shooting videos... it can be a lot. We're coming out with a new album in a few weeks, as I'm sure Namjoon-hyung has mentioned, so we've been trying to put on the finishing touches. It's a great album, I was able to write a lot of it and share my ideas and we're really proud. But there are other things I want to do, too."

  "Like what?"

He scrunched his face in thought for a moment.

  "Release my solo mixtape. I've been working on for literally years. It hasn't felt good enough, but maybe I'm also too picky. And direct more videos. I like directing a lot. I love taking photos and videos, especially of the people and things I love. So I don't know... stuff like that."

He shrugged.

  "I'm sure you will find time," you tried reassuring him.

  "Sometimes it feels like there isn't enough time in the world."

He paused before turning his head to you.

  "Sorry, for ranting about it," he blushed shyly, but gave you a shy smile.

You smiled back.

  "I don't mind."

He stretched out his arm, creating in opening between his shoulder and upper arm. He patted the space above the pit of his arm with his other hand.

"Do you... want to lay your head here?" he asked cautiously, hoping it wasn't too bold of a move to ask.

You nodded slowly and moved closer to him, resting your head in the nook he had made, laying your arm across his chest. You felt nervous, as this wasn't a position you two had ever laid in before. You couldn't believe how well you seemed to fit together, and how warm and comfortable he was. You closed your eyes and felt the rise and fall of his chest with every breath he took. It made you sleepy.

"Thank you for coming over tonight." he mumbled, kissing your forehead softly.

"Mmmhmm..." you responded sleepily.

He caressed your hair gently over and over, lulling you to dreamland.

Before you were completely out however, you heard him say,

"I wish you'd just stay over every night..."

You left Jungkook's room and was met with the bright sunlight coming in through the large windows that looked over the city of Seoul. You desperately needed some coffee so you made your way into the large kitchen.

"I thought I saw your car here when I left for my bike ride this morning!"

Namjoon's back was turned toward you upon you entering the kitchen, but he still noticed your sudden presence. He was pouring coffee grounds into the machine preparing to make a pot.

"Good morning, Joonie," you responded groggily.

You pulled out a stool from under the kitchen island and sat down, leaning your arms on the countertop.

"And how was your night with our golden boy JK?" he asked teasingly.

You blushed. You had told Namjoon when you guys had first started hooking up, but it was still kind of embarrassing having everyone know about it.

"It was fine..." you mumbled back, fiddling with your fingers.

Namjoon turned around and you were met with his dimpled smile.

"Ahhh, I can't believe our maknae is all grown up... and with one of my best friends nonetheless!" he chuckled, "Life sure is weird."

You rolled your eyes at him.

"I wouldn't say he's with me exactly," you corrected him.

He cocked his head.

"No? Then what would you call it?"

You shrugged, avoiding eye contact with your friend.

"I'm not sure..."

He stared at you in disbelief.

"You guys have talked about it at least, right?"

Your silence was all the response he needed.

"Oh my god, (y/n), come on!" he threw his hand up to his forehead and ran it through his brown hair.

"What, Joonie?" you protested, "It's not exactly an easy conversation to have."

"Well of course not, but it's a conversation you should have."

You sighed. You knew he was right.

He leaned in front of you, placing his elbows in his palms.

"He likes you, (y/n)."

You scoffed.

"No, no," you waved your hands in disagreement, "he doesn't. Not like that."

He raised his eyebrows.

"He's constantly asking me about you, (y/n). Wondering what you're up to, what things you like, how he should respond to you."

You looked at him in surprise.

"He is?"

Your heart started racing.

"Yes," he continued, "You're older than him so it's intimidating. I think he's worried about saying the wrong thing, or coming off too strong towards you."

You couldn't believe what you were hearing. Why hadn't Namjoon told you this before? Were you that unobservant that you hadn't noticed Jungkook had feelings for you? Or was Namjoon exaggerating? Your mind was racing. You put your head in your palms and rubbed your face, overwhelmed with this new information. You groaned.

"I'm sorry, (y/n) I thought you two had talked about it." he paused, "So what are you then... like friends with benefits?"

You shook your head and shrugged.

"I-I don't know... just benefits?"

It was Namjoon's turn to groan.

"Ahhhhh shit, that never ends well."

"Well what do I do, Namjoon-ah?" you asked in concern.

He thought for a moment.

"Do you like him?"

You felt your stomach flop. It was a question you had been avoiding asking yourself. And now here was Namjoon asking you for an answer.

You ran a hand through your hair.

"I really don't know..."

And that was the truth. Though you had idea of the answer, you weren't sure you were ready to admit it to yourself... or anyone else for that matter.

"Well, I encourage you to try and figure it all out," he stood up straight and turned to grab two mugs out of the cupboard, "I love you and I love Jungkook-ah, I really don't want to see either of you get hurt."

"Yeah..." you agreed quietly.

He poured both you a cup of coffee then opened the refrigerator.

"Now, what should I make us for breakfast?"

[alreadyblondenow]

And life will always be la vie en rose

Mark Lee x reader // FLUFF, SMUT, SMUT

Themes: long distance relationship, established relationship, very domestic

Word count: 4k

Summary: The city of love with the person you love. Mark surprises you in Paris but the vacation was not going as expected.

Warnings: phone sex, unprotected sex, swearing, mentions of alcohol, drunk mark lee hehe

A/N: Inspired by Emily in Paris and Mark’s TVN short drama. requested by @mellowvoidexpertfriend​​ sorry it took me awhile :( and I hope this makes you happy. Thank you for requesting it! I wanted to give it a sad ending but figured you might hate me if I do that.

Its been almost seven months since you moved to Paris for work and leave the life you’ve always been used to. Your family, friends, your boyfriend Mark, all of them knew that moving to the city of love for your career is a big step.

Although some of them did not agree with your decision that you’re choosing your career, at least you have your boyfriend’s support no matter what. Mark has been with you since you were just starting at your job, he’s always supportive and caring even though he has his own career to take care of. Long distance is hard, but there’s nothing Mark wouldn’t do for you.

“Good morning, Paris” he greets you with a bright smile, the perfect afternoon light hits his face perfectly. You miss seeing that glow in person.

“Good afternoon, Seoul “ you answered with a raspy tone. Still sleepy but happy to see Mark, even if it’s from your phone screen.

“Tired? I miss you” he says, smiling sweetly through the screen. He was still in bed, comfortably laid with his thick blue sheets and striped fluffy pillows.

“Yes. I have a lot of stuff to do in the office today. But I still got time, no need to rush this call” you stretched in bed.

“Want to have phone sex?” He was hesitating to ask you but Mark was really horny in the middle of a hot afternoon. Good thing mornings make you horny like crazy too, so you said ‘yes’ and the next thing you know is you’re both naked in bed, phone on the bedside table with a perfect view of your naked body.

“Run a finger up and down your slit” he commands. You can hear soft grunts from Mark already, pumping his semi-hard cock on the screen. “Yes baby, you look hot” he moans and you smile at his compliment.

“Oh I miss touching your boobs, the next time I see you I’ll grip those so hard- ah” he was having a hard time talking because watching you touch yourself was always too good and too much for him. “So good baby, pinch your nipples for me” he added. You moan and with your free hand, you lick your fingers and rubbed it on your nipples and made sure to let him hear your soft moans.

“Fuck- that was hot” he was going a little too fast pumping his cock, the sound of it was turning you on, and how Mark bites his lips and rolls his head back, watch you with half-lidded eyes. You just smiled, knowing that he’s your man and only you can see him like this. “What’s that smile for? I love it when you smile like that” you giggle at what he said.

“Baby, I’m near” it was a high-pitched moan and you curl yourself a little, trying to stop yourself from cumming so fast.

“Okay-fuck, spread your legs- yeah just like that” you followed what he said and you see his lower abdomen go up and down a little too fast, obvious that he’s stopping himself from cumming before you do. “Remember how I fucked you during your last night here- Ahhh. You were begging me to stop but I couldn’t cause your pussy is so good”

“Fuck Mark” you were still moaning deliciously, trying not to close your legs for Mark. His eyes were fixed to your body, your lips that he misses so much, how you work wonders with your own fingers.

“Oh! I will, Y/n. I will- fuck—you”

You came first then Mark, you watch his thick cum land on his stomach. Watching him look so weak and sweaty but still handsome. He caught you looking at him while you were cleaning your fingers, he winked at you and smiled which made you shy for no reason.

“I love you. Can I talk to you for a couple more minutes?” he requests, holding his phone near his face after he cleaned his cum.

“I love you too. Of course. We can still talk while I’m in the shower” he nod his head in disbelief. And smiled oh so sweetly to you before he tells you about his morning and how he had a dream of you. He was promoted last month, so there’s not much work for him these days because he’s basically a boss now. To be honest you feel bad for not being with him to celebrate for his promotion, talking to him for as long as he likes is the least you can do for him. Sometimes you’re talking to him while you walk to your office, or having lunch alone, virtual dates, or letting him pick what lipstick suits you on a certain outfit.

For almost a year, it was the little things that make you both even more in love with each other and no one is complaining.

“Hey Y/n, the boss wants to see you with your presentation now” your assistant knocked on your door, holding it for you as you gather your laptop and pretend that you’re not nervous.

“What if she hates my ideas?” you asked your assistant, walking together slowly to the conference room.

“The dragon lady will love it, don’t overthink it” she pats your back good luck and opened the door for you.

During your presentation, your boss had this I’m-bored-can-we-go-home-now face and it was bothering you while you were talking in front. Nonetheless, you delivered every single detail perfectly and smoothly that the other members of the board were impressed, and you hope the dragon lady is too.

“Good. Make it happen. Are we done here? Give her the company credit card and I want updates every week. Dismissed”

That’s your cue to breathe. Finally, you can relax. You were smiling from ear to ear for a minute then you remember all the work that you have to finish. Making this project happen-making this fundraiser happen, will seriously impress your boss and the other members of the board. You can’t afford to fuck up.  

Overworking doesn’t bother you at all, you don’t care if you’re the last one in the office and the first one to come the next day. You love your job and you value it. But to be honest, overworking is your coping mechanism. To stop thinking about home and Mark, just continue until you make it.

You got home and talked to Mark about the great news, of course, he’s very proud of you. Then you talked about the list of things that you have to work on for the project, and you wish you didn’t. Mark loves you, and that’s clear but he hates it when you overwork.

“Can’t you, make someone else do it?” easy for him to say because he’s a boss now.

“No, baby I can’t. This is my one way ticket to be the boss. If I make this happen, then okay, I’ll order everyone I see. But for now... sorry babe, it’s work for me” you said while unzipping your dress and moving around your room to change into some comfortable clothes. “Are you mad?” you asked, hoping he’s not.

“I can’t be mad at you, for loving what you do. I’m worried, that’s all”

After that call, Mark was dealing with some of his work as well and thinking about how he can rescue you from overworking. Well, he only had one effective solution. And that is to visit you in Paris and be with you so he can take care of you for a short time. He wasn’t going to visit until Christmas, but he couldn’t wait much longer.

He gave himself a week to think this all out and plan his surprise to you. He booked a flight, took two weeks off from work, and packed his bags.

You, on the other hand, is busy overworking tonight at the office. You feel heavy and exhausted, hungry but you just want to sleep when you finally get home, and Mark hasn’t messaged you like he normally does in almost two days. You feel awful, but Paris at night can quickly take away all youe exhaustion. Everywhere you look is beautiful.

As you force yourself not to feel tired on your way home, you saw a familiar figure who just got out of the taxi with a bunch of luggage. Am I dreaming? You slightly slap your face and walk slowly behind the man and wait for him to turn around.

When he did, you almost burst into tears.

It’s been seven months since you last saw Mark in the flesh.

“Hi, you look exactly like my girlfriend” he smiled and scrunched his nose, pull you into a hug, and kissed you in front of your apartment building. Paris is starting to feel like the city of love, finally.

You helped him with his bags up to your apartment, feeling so excited and happy that the tiredness that you’re feeling earlier was long gone. As soon as you reached your door and opened it, Mark put down the bags and crashed into your lips. Kissing you in the dark with only the light from your window.

“Oh, I’m never going to leave your side,” he said while hungrily kissing you. Removing your clothes one by one, making a trail of clothes until you reach your room, and pushed you on your bed. It’s been seven months since you last had sex with him and you’re sure that Mark will make you feel good tonight, as always. He may look innocent and cute always, but Mark knows how to fuck.

“We just have to be quiet tonight Mark- French neighbors. Don’t want to piss them with my moans” you warn him before his cold hand lands on your boobs, touch them softly and squeeze them tightly as he promised.

“Okay, let’s just keep our moans between us two” he kisses your lips as his way of saying, he’s going to start now. Kissing you down to your body until he reaches your pussy, to show that you're eager, you spread your legs widely for him and begged quietly. He used his pinky finger and slides it up and down your slit slowly. So slowly that it makes your legs shiver and your hips jolt, giving you goosebumps and making you sensitive already. He smiled at your reaction, happy that he has that effect on you.

“Wet” he murmurs and proceeds to kiss your pussy, like it was your lips. Feeling his hot tongue on your cunt, using it to fuck you. He spits on your cunt and let you feel it roll down your slit. It makes you sensitive and moans his name. He goes back in and licks you good, his hands run softly on your stomach, making you feel calm and confused. When he felt that you’re already on the edge, he watches you moan quietly, pinched your nipples, and did not released it until you’re shivering and shaking your legs uncontrollably.

You catch your breath until you see Mark above you, kissing your cheeks and reaching for your hands to intertwine it with his. “I just miss you, is it too much?” you shook your head with a smile and kissed your boyfriend back.

“My turn to give back,” you said weakly, but you’re already pushing him on the mattress. On your way to straddle the man you love and ride him good. You kissed him softly, grinding on his cock and spreading your juices on it. Brushing his nipples softly, which made him stop kissing you to let out a curse and tell you to don’t stop. It was too much for him but he likes it, overstimulating himself was his favorite and he drags you into that pleasure of his.

As you put his cock inside you, he grab holds on your wrist that he allows you to rest on his strong chest as you fuck him. Seeing you on top of him after for so long was toe-curling for him. The thought of it makes him blush, but also his view of your boobs in front of his face makes him smile too. He licks it once, “Oh- Baby, do that again?” you ask of him, he knew you would like it.

Your boobs are perfectly being sucked by Mark while you bounce up and down on him, rolling your hips at a steady pace. He lets go of your right nipple with a wet sound, feeling both of your nipples really swollen and sensitive. “Can’t hold on much longer baby, let me take over?” he was already on edge, you are too, but you let him take control and let him fuck you senseless that you were covering your mouth to stop yourself from moaning to loud.

“Bite me,” he said and you didn’t think twice, you bit his shoulder as you ride your high. He was cumming so hard too and his whimpers were muffled by the pillow behind you. You feel like he's going to crush your hand by gripping it so tightly and he feels like his shoulder is about to bleed.

It was a romantic night in the city of love. Both exhausted from sex but you two never kept quiet and talked to each other all through the night, watching the Eiffel Tower from your window, bodies covered with your thin sheets. You snuggle to Mark sniffing his armpit and making him giggle like a teenager, he tickles your legs and making you jolt and kick him a little too hard which made you both laugh so hard. You were away from each other for a long time, but your love stays the same and neither one of you is planning to ruin it.

The next day, Mark woke up with the smell of freshly cooked omelet and the zest of freshly squeezed orange juice. He looked at your clock on the bedside table, and it was almost lunchtime. He was quick to put on his glasses and find you, still naked because of last night’s intimacy but he doesn’t care. He feels home because you’re the first person he sees. Mark wraps his arms around you and rests his chin on your shoulder.

“I was wondering where did my shirt go,” he says with a raspy voice. It’s obvious that he’s still sleepy but he wants to spend as much time with you.

“Still sleepy?” you turn around after turning the stove off, “And still naked with only your glasses, huh? You look like a nerdy porn star” you tease him, slap his ass, and made him wear at least his sweatpants and come eat breakfast with you.

“You don’t have work today?” he asks, chewing his omelet and drinking his juice.

“I have but, I call in sick for three days. Wouldn’t want to waste time” you said, smiling and winked at him. “You know, I know why you’re here. And I want you to know it’s working” he chuckled and scratched his head, busted he thought. “But I can only leave work for three days, after that I promise you I will do my best to still be with you, and not waste your time here-“ you were talking too fast, rambling that he didn’t have any choice but to stop you from talking.  

“Understood, baby chill. I’m not here to sabotage your career, I’m here to take care of you”

In those three days, you and Mark enjoy Paris like a married couple enjoying their honeymoon. You’ve never enjoyed Paris like this, all thanks to Mark, the city became even more special and magical for you. You brought him to different French restaurants and made him eat a lot of good food and a lot of Watermelons, of course. You toured the city hand in hand, going to art galleries and taking countless pictures. The winery tour and your dinner date made Mark really drunk and it made him ten times even more funny. It was a struggle to bring him back to your apartment in his drunken state, but you love him too much that you even enjoyed his drunken company.

“I’m gonna ask you to marry me okay? Are you ready?” you help him step by step as you go up to your apartment, laughing so loud and disturbing your french neighbors, he was going on and on talking about marriage. “It’s true, check my pocket get the ring”

There's a huge part of you that secretly hopes that he’s telling the truth. Even if he’s proposing in his drunken state and couldn’t pop a knee, it’s okay. The staircase is still romantic for you and drunk or not, you love Mark with all your heart and soul. If Mark was telling the truth… you will say ‘yes’ and accept it will all your heart.

With all your bravery, you checked the pocket of his jacket and looked for a ring or a box. Honestly, you don’t know what you’re searching for. But there’s no ring. It made you disappointed but just laughed it all out and soothe his back because he’s about to throw up.

You reached your apartment, just in time for Mark to puke and curse every alcohol in the world. “Sorry if I’m a burden” he murmurs, resting his forehead on your toilet bowl while reaching for the flush.

“You’re never a burden. Feeling okay? Come on I’ll help you clean up” you kissed him on the forehead and left to get some clean clothes for him.

You spent the night taking care of Mark, enjoying how he hugs you so tight like he’s a child while he whines about how his head hurts. The night mostly consists of him whispering his apologies and never-ending I love you’s, while you still think about what he said earlier. Even if it didn’t happen tonight, the fact that he brought it up, finally, means that he was thinking of doing it someday. And that thought alone made you throw away your disappointment and hug him even more tightly.

Days go by and you juggle work and spending time with Mark and enjoy Paris. You feel bad letting him visit some great places alone or stay inside your apartment until you come home from work and go out finally. It was heartbreaking in many ways, but you didn’t have a choice.

On Mark’s first weekend in Paris, the first thing you did is wake him so early with loving kisses and go to the market with him. There, you and mark bought food for dinner tonight and promised you will cook for him. He was so in love with the city but had a hard time talking to French people.

“Wow, your French has improved” he praises you, “I read somewhere on the internet that the best way to learn the French language is in bed. Is there something I need to know, huh Baby?” he kissed your forehead to let you know that he’s only joking and completely well aware that cheating on him is beyond impossible.

“Fuck me in Korean then so I can learn it too” it made you both laugh, finding each other completely hilarious.

“Okay, I’ll fuck the Korean words out of you tonight”

The dinner you made was delicious, and it made Mark sad for a second because he realized he has to wait for a few months more to taste your cooking again. To light up the mood, you didn’t let him have a single alcohol tonight and made fun of his alcohol tolerance. And soon, after cleaning up from dinner, you two made love again.

He was balls inside you while you were making the pretties moans only for him to hear, he suddenly moaned Korean words which made you lost it and laughed so loud, your voices could be heard from your open window.

“Were you about to cum? I’m sorry, I just want to make you happy” he said, still inside you but not moving anymore.

“On edge, yeah. But I am, happy Mark. You came to Paris for me, even though I work my ass off while you’re still here. Oh, baby, I feel sorry.” You whine and nuzzle to the side of his sweaty face.

“Will you be happier if I ask you to marry me? Hmm?”

You were like a statue when you heard him talk about it again, and this time he’s sober. He kissed you back to reality, smiling nervously on top of you while waiting for your answer. “Hey” he kissed you again, giggling awkwardly.

“Of-of course I’ll be happy- are you proposing now?” you were stuttering and your hands were shaking as you reach for his face to cup it and kiss him. Tears in your eyes, pure happiness.

“While I'm still inside of you? No- I already have the ring, but with all that’s going on with your work right now. I just had to be sure, you want this. The last thing I want is to ruin our relationship and I’m sorry I had to say this to you while I’m still inside of you-“

You stopped him from rambling and talking too much, “Save it for breakfast. Now, continue fucking me in Korean” you both giggled again in no time. The night went on but it became, even more, sweeter for the both of you, more fucking in Korean happened and both of you slept like angels.

The morning after, you two made breakfast while trying so hard to keep your hands from each other. Obviously, the sweetness from last night hasn’t died yet. Marriage is not always a bed of roses, you’re aware of that, but you pray and pray that you and Mark stay the same like this for many years more.

“So that night at the stairs?” you asked him, taking a sip of from your coffee, eyes never leaving each other.

“I was serious but too drunk. I was going to talk about it with you that night, but…” you understand. Still, it made you happy. The morning was filled with laughter and kisses with Mark, talking more about marriage and the possibilities of having kids, shower sex, and him helping you prepare for work.

When you were just about to leave, “Oh! I almost forgot, fuck, Uhm- I need you to be my date tomorrow night. It’s the event that I’ve been working on, here” you hand him your credit card, “Sorry I can’t go with you. Buy yourself a nice suit okay? I’ll see you at dinner, I’ll be a little late, but I’ll make it to dinner” and again, you feel bad about treating him this way.

Mark is amazing in many ways, he bought a nice suit for your event tomorrow night and looked for a quiet french restaurant where he can propose to you properly. It was not hard, but talking to French people was not easy either. All he had in mind was, you deserved a romantic proposal.

Your most awaited day finally comes and everything is running smoothly. You haven’t seen Mark, because the dragon lady wanted you to get ready with her at the hotel where she was staying. “Have you seen Mark?” you asked your assistant, “I left him at the gallery. I told him you’ll meet him shortly”

After a few minutes of saying 'hi' 'hello' to the guests, you forgot that you were looking for your boyfriend and felt bad for doing that.

“Hey beautiful” he whispered behind you, and you almost spilled your champagne. You turned around and see the most handsome man on Earth, wearing a black and white suit with a slightly crooked bow tie. Your mind swims to the question, ‘will he be this handsome on your wedding day?’

“Wow- I’m speechless” is all you can say while admiring him like he's one of the paintings hanged on the wall.  

“You look expensively beautiful” he greets you with a kiss and you fixed his bow tie, asking for a kiss again that he happily gave. You showed him around and introduced him to your friends, exchanged laughs for a minute then you're around working again, leaving him alone. He watches you do your job, even if he’s left alone most of the time. Nonetheless, the event was a success and you’re soon to be promoted, the dragon lady told you herself.

“Baby, I’m sorry”

“What for? You were great the whole night” he helps you unzip your beautiful Valentino dress.

“How many times did we talk tonight, I feel bad” you whine and helped him with his tie while you’re all exposed, wearing only your black lingerie. He played with the strap of your bra and proceeds to palm your ass. You did the same because he has a much nicer ass, he chuckled and kissed you to bed. Just like that, Mark turned everything around.

It’s his last day in Paris today, he leaves tomorrow morning. And you hate it. The bed feels, even more, warmer with him in it, you’re not ready to let go yet. “Don’t worry. We have forever to make the bed warm. Right?” he tries to cheer you up. “Don’t forget the dinner tonight okay?” he added.

Your day went on with Mark and you two spend more time together talking about life and everything under the sun, laughing while eating watermelons, until you had to leave again for the company dinner. It was supposed to be a night filled with Mark and Mark only but your boss decided to throw a dinner celebration for a successful event the other night, and you can’t miss it because she told you, ‘Show up tonight. Don’t piss me’. with a sly smirk that you oh so hate.  

It was heartbreaking. You don’t know if the dragon lady knew that Mark was going to propose tonight or it’s just your life, ruining your perfect relationship with Mark. The dinner ended almost before midnight and you ran to the restaurant Mark told you not caring anymore if these Manolo pumps cost a fortune.

There, you saw Mark playing the piano while the restaurant staff was already cleaning up, fixing tables and chairs. It's been a while since the last time you saw him play an instrument, he knew you love it when he sings for you. You looked around the place and figured how he found a place like this in a country he's not familiar with. He was trying so hard during his whole stay, and you just watched and you let the people from work drain you until there’s nothing left for Mark.

He was still playing the piano sadly when you embraced him from behind, greeting him with a kiss. Feeling sorry for ruining the night he has planned for the two of you. He stopped and faked a smile, it was obvious and it pains you to see him like this. The space was quiet, and you notice that the staff were nice enough to give you two some privacy. He continued playing the piano and started singing the song his father used when he proposed to his mother.

You feel unworthy of his love.

Mark kissed you before he stands up, but all you wanted to do is say sorry over and over again. But you didn’t want to ruin the mood. You watch him bend on one knee, smiling shyly but you can say that he knows what he's doing. “Even if I already know the answer, and even if you become the busiest woman in Paris, marry me? Make me the happiest man alive?”

You were in tears, but you don’t know if it's made of happiness or sadness. There was a moment of silence that made him nervous and thought that maybe you changed your mind. It was making him nervous.

“Yes yes, of course”

Mark sighed in relief and let out a nervous laugh. He puts the ring on your finger and dried your tears before he kisses you. You see his sharp cheekbones appear from too much smiling and told you that his cheeks hurt.

That very moment made you realize that your job here in Paris and your boss, doesn’t deserve you. You can be amazing somewhere else, somewhere closer to Mark. In that way, you can be busy, yes, but you can come home to him every day and fuck in Korean the whole night.

[dinosaurtsukki]

BSD x university au hc’s | pt. 2

part 2 of the university au hc’s !! i am obviously a slut for chuuya and fyodor so don’t mind me. i hope you guys like this !!

check out pt. 1 here

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Akutagawa Ryuunosuke:

i love akutagawa ryuunosuke my angst child but i’m just like ‘hmmmmmmm’ when it comes to what his course would probably be

after extensive research aka reading his character page on wiki i feel like maybe he’d be a history major because,,,, he likes antiques?

well his clothes do seem very dark academia-esque and i can see him liking something as cool as history

akutagawa’s probably into something like war history but he’s not weird about it he just finds it really cool how different strategies work or analyzing what exactly makes the winners win

he absolutely HATES the fact that he keeps having to read the Iliad for class

he’s also that classmate who INTENSIVELY DEFENDS achilles for being a bit of a little bitch (but he fully agrees that patroclus and achilles were gay af ok this was random moving on)

akutagawa has practically no social life. he doesn’t go to parties, he doesn’t talk to his roommate, he doesn’t even like to eat in the dining hall

BUT he absolutely loves being in debate team because WINNING

he’s such a nightmare to work with though but he just delivers so well when it’s time for him to speak. like, if he’s on a negative and it’s time to hash out rebuttals, just prepare to get MURDERED

other debaters: “esteemed scholars and adjudicators...”

akutagawa: “you, sir, have no idea how wrong you are.”

that is until dazai decided to randomly show up at a debate tournament all ‘la di da da’ like and completely crushed akutagawa along with his ego

from then on he started stalking dazai and just SOMEHOW managed to end up in his circle of friends

even though he’s antisocial in real life, akutagawa 100% runs a dark academia aesthetic blog on tumblr i’m right and i don’t accept criticism

it’s actually really good he has a ton of followers and even does requests for moodboards if someone asks nicely

atsushi was the one who actually found out about it but he’s nice so he didn’t tell akutagawa about it

kunikida probably follows that blog

Chuuya Nakahara:

if this part sounds like i’m just thirsting for chuuya then you’re absolutely right i love wine man

don’t get mad at me but i can ABSOLUTELY SEE HIM MAJORING IN FASHION DESIGN I MEAN LOOK AT HIM

he’s just always had such a good eye for fashion and he’s veryyy meticulous when it comes to snipping and putting together clothes

chuuya also carries a sketchbook full of designs and his drawings look amazing and he isn’t afraid to just show them off

that said he doesn’t dress like a tired uni student at all, like he just always looks so on-point and unbothered by his five million deadlines

dazai: chuuya, i said this was a CASUAL LUNCH

chuuya, dressed in what looks like silk pajamas: THIS IS CASUAL

tbh if he just wore a white t-shirt and jeans i would die maybe he’s actually saving us from this ordeal

he has so much talent though as a designer he’s probably had several internships with design companies all throughout his years at uni

i feel like chuuya’s also really active in extracurriculars and has been in leadership positions in some of them (he probably runs the student org for fashion design)

chuuya in a student band though oh my gosh i can’t breathe i can’t breathe him as a VOCALIST?? and wearing torn jeans and eyeliner and that same hat in concerts ican’t brEATHE

okay in all honesty he would thrive being in a band chuuya loves the attention and the creativity of being able to design their whole look and write songs

tbh i don’t know if he’d have a roommate chuuya’s probably the type who’d rather have one of those single rooms or just rent a flat for him to stay in even after graduation

because his social life is super vibrant, he does have a lot of friends and he does make an effort to get to know all of them individually 

but he’s more open around those who he’s been friends with for a really long time and as much as he’d like to say dazai isn’t one of them, he is

also chuuya is definitely the type to party hard during the weekends and has more than once crashed in someone’s house after drinking too much (dazai drew on his face on more than one occasion)

Oda Sakunosuke:

i love this man SO MUCH you guys have no idea i would literally die for him

100% this guy majors in creative writing because this is supported by FACTS and not just me wanting to be coursemates with him in this fictional world

super serious and diligent with his work especially since he’s passionate about writing. he loves to read in his spare time and is such a fan of classic novels about social realism or philosophy

oda spends 99% of his time in second-hand bookshops that the owner probably knows him by name at this point

he’s super old school when it comes to writing though, like he still keeps and writes in a notebook before typing it up on a laptop and no matter how many times dazai tells him its impractical, oda just keeps doing it

lmao whenever workshops come around he’s super nice with his critique. i bet a lot of his fellow classmates like sending their writing drafts to him

he draws smiley faces and always adds ‘nice work’ on people’s drafts omg i love odasaku

he’s such an old soul, he probably doesn’t do a whole lot of partying but he likes more quiet, private social events like drinking with close friends or just hanging out and talking at other people’s houses

he and dazai probably met when dazai decided to take an intro to creative writing class and wrote a long poem about double suicide on his first day that kind of put off everyone in the class from wanting to sit with him

odasaku was the only one who wasn’t exactly bothered but he did give dazai some comments to help him with his poetry and dazai instantly wanted to be his friend

in terms of extracurricular life, i can definitely see odasaku joining a writing organization and even the campus newspaper. he does find joy in interviewing students for newspaper articles

he’s also pretty into photography and uses a really old, second-hand camera that he bought at an antique store and fixed himself. at one point he won a prize in a contest

odasaku would be the best roommate. he’s super sensitive to when you have a bad day and will invite you to sit on his bed and hug his pillow and talk about your problems

scratch that, everyone talks to odasaku about their problems and now your room is like a therapist’s office

Edgar Allan Poe:

i swear this was the only gif i could find other than actual edgar allan poe

ANOTHER CREATIVE WRITING BUDDY AHHH I WOULD LOVE TO BE BESTIES WITH HIM AHHH

well actually i feel like since he’s super ambitious and already has a fixed idea on the stuff he likes to write, he’d probably double major in something like forensic science because he’d use it to write his mystery novels

omg that’s where he meets ranpo and now pretty much every main character poe writes is slightly based on on ranpo

it’s a problem. his professor brings it up more than once during his classes but it’s poe’s Thing now

he also has such an unending passion for gothic literature and he wears those white, long-sleeved blouses and waistcoats on a REGULAR BASIS

chuuya probably saw him once and was like ‘hmm, i could pull that off’

poe’s daily route is just going to the library and to class and then go home and that’s about it

he ended up working as a student assistant at the library because he’s just super familiar with the book collections and it’s a job that’s peaceful and quiet 

more than once though, he’d just be really in-deep with his writing to the point that he doesn’t even notice that the library has closed or that he hasn’t eaten the entire day

that’s alright though because ranpo always passes by the library at night to check on his friend and (reluctantly) give him some snacks

also since poe’s pretty much a recluse, he doesn’t go to any social event UNLESS it’s a halloween-themed one

he loves going all out with his costumes because he’s a Drama Queen like that but the problem is he keeps dressing up as gothic novel characters and nobody gets it

dazai, trying to guess his costume: umm,, Two-Face from Batman?

poe: IT’S DR. JEKYLL AND MR. HYDE

there was this one time when poe took it upon himself to host the halloween party and it was EPIC

he basically designed it as a murder mystery night wherein everyone who came pretended to be guests at a house and then a murder happened

the only problem was that ranpo was conspiring with poe and it was pretty much unfair

except for the fact that ranpo was frustrated at how bad everyone was at deducing that he ended up solving the mystery for them

Fyodor Dostoevsky:

one of my favorite scenes of him in s3 was of fyodor playing the cello because god damn that is beautiful and therefore i am hc-ing him as a music major and you can’t tell me otherwise

fyodor is an absolute music genius and he was definitely scouted by the university’s music program and then he was granted a scholarship (because in this ideal university, the arts are valued)

he purposely decided to go to a university rather than a music conservatory because he’s also interested in learning a bunch of other things

aside from his music classes, he ventures into comparative literature and philosophy, even a bit of computer science at some point

people always assume that since he’s a music major he probably wouldn’t do well in other subjects but SURPRISE BITCH

anyway, fyodor’s a genius because god clearly has favorites

aside from attending class, he’s even part of an official orchestra and has even landed a few solos 

that said, he’s quite busy and very preoccupied in his own work to actually have a social life either

you’ll often find him rehearsing by himself in an empty classroom for hours and hours on end (someone pls bring him food he’s also the type to forget to eat or even drink water)

if you are able to catch him perform at an orchestra or just practice by himself, it’s quite a mesmerizing sight. his eyes are often closed so he could focus on the sound alone and his fingers move so elegantly along the neck of the cello

(sorry i just love people who play any form of stringed instrument)

fyodor also takes such good care of his cello. also he would probably kill you on the spot if you touched his bow

he has a fairly small group of friends and they like playing chess together (even though fyodor is better than all of them) and just talk about um,, idk philosophy and stuff (whatever it is smart people do idk i’m not one of them)

i have a feeling he actually follows akutagawa’s dark academia blog and loves his content, even to the point of requesting ‘cello player moodboards’

also because he’s a cello player he needs to take care of his fingers so he wears gloves a lot (idk why i find this hot)

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taglist (check out my post for details on being part of my taglist): @waitforitillwritemywayout @tpwkatsumu @laure-chan

[thiswasinevitableid]

.. for mermay.. 8, indruck nsfw?

Here you go! Duck’s design is based on a rudderfish.

Authors note: since prompt 8 is “drunk,” drinking is mentioned in this. It’s also implied Indrid is doing some self-destructive behaviors to cope with trauma.

The party is a splendid success, as was the book launch that preceded it. Indrid has done what he does best, lined his pockets and those of his agents and editors, and gotten everyone talking. 

“Did you see the one of the pyres?”

“The one of the hurricane aftermath, the look in the girls eyes is so haunting.”

“Personally, I found the jeweled mummies a bit much, but the emergency room shots? Stunning.”

This is why Indrid is sitting on the rocks on his private cove, and will not be going back up to the house until he’s polished off all three of these heavily spiked bottles of eggnog. It’s better than the time he emptied most of a bottle of vanilla vodka, but not by much. 

He was tipsy when he snuck out the back door and down the path to the sea. So when the empty bottle rolls away, all he can do is whap at the air close to it and wave as it plonks into the water.

“Oops. Hic, oh, hic, well, what’s one more piece of trash in, hic, a dying world?”

He yelps, knocking his remaining bottles into the sand as the lost one flies through the air towards him. Or he thinks that’s the trajectory; it’s hard to tell. The point is, the bottle is back and he’s clutching his chest like an old man in a silent movie.

“Look, man, I know it’s temptin to just leave trash everywhere, but there are signs up and down this beach sayin not to litter.” A man floats in the water at the foot of the rock, black hair plastered to his forehead and muscular arms crossed over a bare chest. 

“It, hic, it was an accident. And I am, hic, in no condition to retrieve anything from the water.”

The man frowns, “shit, if you’re that drunk, you oughta get off the rocks. It’s deep here, you might drown. Go sit on the sand, it’s safer. Warmer too, still holdin heat from the sun.”

“I, I’m fine, hic, don’t, don’t need some wet man babying me.” He stands to prove his point, nearly falls face first into the water, and sits back down, “see, m’fine.”

“Get off the rock.” The man says, sounding for all the world like a cat owner two seconds from grabbing the spray bottle. 

“No.” Indrid huffs. 

Water splashes his face and he sputters.

The man pulls his hand back, preparing to send another wave at him, “Get.”

“Fuck you” 

The splash is much more intense this time and he curses, scrambles sideways, and falls to his knees in the sand. 

“That’s better, now I don’t gotta worry about fishin your careless ass outta the water.”

“If, if we are, hic, t-talking careless, you, you shouldn’t say a thing. You’re, hic, swimming in cold water with, without a wetsuit.”

The man shrugs, “Don’t need one.” With that he floats on his back, bringing a dark-scaled tail into view. 

“You’re, hic, you’re a merman.” He crawls forward, breathless, “that’s so cool, wanna, gotta photograph you, so handsome, gotta-”

“Nope” The merman swims back into deeper water, “no pictures, those can end real bad for us.”

“But, but you’re so beautiful. If, hic, if pictures are no good, I, I can draw. I draw good, even if no one likes it.”

“Uh, you really wanna sit on a cold beach paintin my picture instead of hangin out at that shindig?” He points up the hill to the brightly lit house. 

“No, nonono, hic, don’t, don’t wanna go back up there, s’awful, hic.” 

“Awful?” The merman sounds concerned, and in the patchy moonlight he swims close enough that Indrid can see the details of his face, “is someone up there hurtin you?”

“No” He shakes his head, “it, it-”

“Indrid!”

“Damn it.” He mutters as the merman retreat beneath waves. As his guests grow closer he stands, carefully picks up all three bottles, and heads uphill to meet them.

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Indrid shuffles through the house, head pounding, decides he hates the following people, in this order:

-His agent

-Himself

-Whoever mentioned it was a shame there were no Plata River Bridge photos, causing Indrid to drink a whole martini in order to bite his tongue.

It’s not until his third cup of coffee that he remembers the merman. God, he was really rude to someone who was just trying to keep him from drowning.

Very, very carefully, he makes his way to the beach, sketchbook in one hand and thermos in the other. 

“Hello?” He calls across the water. No reply. Of course there isn’t; the merman has the whole ocean to explore, there’s no reason for him to hang around Indrid’s house. He sighs, sits down on a piece of driftwood, and draws. Normally the cold would drive him back indoors, but today it’s bracing, blowing his hangover off of him and down the sand. 

“Glad to see you’re in one piece” 

Indrid sits bolt upright. The merman waves to him.

“You came back?”

“Yeah? I mean, this is part of my rounds, so I come by here at least once a day. More surprised you’re down here when it’s all cold and grey.”

“I, ah, I wanted to apologize for last night. I was being stubborn and rude.”

“You were, but I was kinda grumpy too. At the end of my shift and all that, but I shouldn’t have splashed you.” He smiles, swims closer, “do you, uh, remember any of the other stuff you said?”

“I have a vague memory of begging to photograph you. Or maybe draw, it’s all very fuzzy.”

“You did. I, uh” the merman’s cheeks turn pink, “you were really, uh, well let’s just say you were excited at the idea of drawin me, so I thought maybe, if you wanted to..”

“Yes”  Indrid shifts down into the sand so he can rest his back on the log, “can we do it now? You said you were on rounds, and if you’re working I don’t want to interrupt.”

“I’m done for the day. Should I get on a rock or somethin?”

“Can you come on the sand at all? Oh, ah, it seems you can.” Indrid scoots back as the merman slides gracefully ashore. In the daylight, his tail is a rich green-brown, his hair streaked with grey near his forehead. His eyes, one green and one brown, regard Indrid with curiosity as he turns to a new page. 

“You got a name?”

“Indrid. Indrid Cold.”

“Duck Newton. It’s a nickname.” The mer stretches his arms and tail, and were Indrid in a self-flattering frame of mind he’d say he was flexing for him, “I gotta pose?”

“No, as long as you don’t move too much, I should be fine.”

Duck nods, shifts onto his belly with his tail dipped in the surf. Indrid sets his pen to paper, asks Duck what he does for work and when the tunnel vision of his project dissipates, it’s dusk.

“Oh my, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to keep you so long.”

The merman yawns, “S’okay, it was nice talkin with you, and I got to birdwatch some. Can I see?”

Indrid turns the sketchbook. Mis-matched eyes widen. 

“Holy fuck. You made me look damn good.”

“I simply captured you as you are.” Indrid feels a blush moving up his cheeks as Duck scoots closer. 

“You gonna do this tomorrow?  If, uh, if you don’t wanna draw me again, I can bring you some interestin stuff from the water. If, uh, if you want.”

His schedule for tomorrow starts with a phone interview, after which he was planning to sit in a dark living room and watch mindless T.V.

“That sounds lovely. Thank you, Duck.”

The merman beams, waves, and then pushes back into the sea, raising his tail once in farewell. 

---------------------------------------------------------------

“...now, Juno thinks it’s-holy fuck ‘Drid, was that your stomach?” Duck raises his head from where he’s been sort-of-napping, sort of talking.

“Hmm? Yes, I suppose it was.” He has his watercolors out today, a surprise stretch of sunny days rendering the beach and hillsides in glorious technicolor. 

“When did you last eat?”

“..............”

“Oh my fuckin god, ‘Drid, no wonder you look like you’re close to passin out.”

“I’m fine.” 

Duck has that look on his face again, the one he got when Indrid admitted to walking the cliff-side trails when he’s coming back from the roadhouse on the edge of town. When Indrid says he hasn’t slept in two days. 

The merman says nothing, goes back to reading the book of nature essays Indrid brought him. A buzz cuts through the air and he groans, shuts off the alarm on his phone, “I need to go get ready for that interview.”

“You wanna meet up tonight?”

“Yes.”

“Great. But, uh, seem to remember you promised me some of those cookies you say are the best in the world.”

Indrid smirks, “I suppose I did.”

“I want some. But not for dinner, with dinner. You feel me?” There’s an edge in his drawl, as formidable and unyielding as the nearby cliff-face. 

“Alright, I'll bring you some other things to try.” Indrid smiles, suddenly looking forward to a grocery run. 

Duck, now in the water, looks over his shoulder, “Good boy.”

Indrid shivers even as heat blooms in his chest. 

When sunset graces the beach, Indrid is busy setting out a half dozen take-out containers and many plastic boxes of cookies and fruit.

“Damn” Duck slides and wiggles his way onto the sand by the blanket, “you went all out.”

“You wanted a meal. I brought you one.”

“Sure did.” Duck sniffs the air, taps a carry-out bowl of soup, “what’s this?”

“Umm” Indrid peers at the label, “french onion soup.”

“Can I have it?”

“Of course.”

The merman downs the soup as fast as temperature allows, munches happily on the orange segments Indrid peels and samples the cookies. 

“Ahhh” He flops his head into Indrid’s lap, “that hit the spot.”

The human nods, bottle of pineapple soda on his lips. He’s so happy and full. 

Wait.

“Duck? Did you suggest this just so I would eat something?”

The face in his lap only looks a little chagrined, “Kinda. I been meanin to suggest this, and today seemed like the right time. And, uh, I know sometimes I have a hard time lookin after myself for me, but if someone else tells me to do it, or I have to do it as part of lookin after them, it’s easier. Thought that might be goin’ on with you. I, uh, I won’t do it again if you don’t want me to.”

“Nono” Indrid sets a hand in his hair, stroking it so Duck rubs his cheek against his thigh, “you’re right. It was easier to do the kind thing for myself when you told me to. Would, ah, would you be willing to do it again.” 

Duck meets his eyes, gaze bubbling with something dark and alluring, “Sure thing, ‘Drid.”

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

“Before you go, I wanted to give you this.” Indrid holds out the small camera. Duck, perched on a rock, takes it with a puzzled frown. He adds, “It’s waterproof. You mentioned you wish you could take pictures of the things you see in your home. I couldn’t think of a better time to give you than your trip.”

“Thanks, ‘Drid.” Duck leans forward, rubbing their cheeks together, “you remember your instructions?”

“Yes.” He whimpers when Duck pulls back. 

“Good. Want you in good shape when I get home.” Duck’s voice returns to normal, “should be back in a week. I’ll see you then.”

Indrid waves goodbye, keeps waving well past the point where Duck could see him, even if he surfaced. Then he grabs the basket of fresh oysters and heads to the house to call Barclay. 

The phone calls and dinners with one of his few friends in town are part of his agreement with Duck. The mer told him he couldn’t meet every night, so maybe Indrid should find other forms of company. He also helpfully supplies Indrid with fresh shellfish that he has no idea how to cook, but his friend the professional chef certainly does. This dovetails nicely with his promise to Duck to eat at least one full meal a day.

It’s not just the strange dynamic they’ve hit upon that’s improving his life; it’s Duck. The merman makes him feel so safe, like someone cares about the real him and not just the him that makes them money or feeds their morbid curiosity. Not to mention he’s even more handsome than Indrid first thought and he spends plenty of nights jerking off to the thought of a cool, strong tail between his legs. 

He does well the first five days Duck is gone. Barclay and Dani come over for dinner, he paints and draws prolifically, and he even reads up on whether it’s feasible for him to adopt rats (“those are kinda like otters, right?” “close enough.”). Friday night his agent calls, excitedly reporting that it’ll soon be the fifth anniversary of the Plata River incident and the magazine is getting requests for a feature on it and Indrid will be perfect. 

Indrid says he’ll think about it, hangs up, and opens the fridge. He promised Duck he’d only drink if it was with dinner or with friends. He grabs two wine coolers and heads into the living room. 

The next day, he’s idly fiddling with the dating app he hasn’t touched since December when a new profile appears. Very good looking, close by, clearly just passing through town, and interested in Indrid. He invites him over, spends the next half hour getting ready, and even cleans the bedroom because well, that’s what he’d do for Duck, he should do it for anyone else he brings over. 

Indrid opens the door at the second knock. The guy takes one look at him, shakes his head, and returns to his car.

Indrid downs the remaining wine coolers and goes down to the beach to sulk. He tucks his legs up, pressing his forehead to his knees, and rocks back and forth. He’s nearly sober when a voice drifts across the waves.

“‘Drid?” 

He looks up, glasses slipping down his nose, “Duck? You’re, you’re back.”

“Yep. It was fast goin the last ten miles. Brought the camera back, think you gotta be the one to get the pictures off, but I can’t wait to show you all the cool shit we saw.”

“Me neither” He stands and instantly pitches forward, landing on his hands and knees in the shallow water. 

“You been drinking?”

“Yes.”

“You and Barclay have a good time?” He’s giving him the benefit of the doubt, giving him an out, and Indrid decides that isn’t what he wants. 

“I wasn't with Barclay. I got horrible news last night, and today I tried to get laid and got rejected, and I’m at the point in my life where I nearly called after the guy that he could keep his eyes shut and I’d just blow him so he wouldn’t need to look at or touch me. So yes, Duck, I’ve been drinking.”

Duck’s expression swims between concern and disappointment, then comes to rest on neutral steel, “That ain’t what we agreed.”

“I’m aware. But I don’t care, I don’t” he aims a splash at Duck, “it doesn’t matter, nothing matters, nothing will come of it, same as always.”

The merman cocks an eyebrow, “You really think that? You forgettin I said there’d be consequences if you broke the rules?”

“Oooh, I’m so scared.” Indrid splashes him again.

Duck smiles, reminding him that all his teeth end in points, “Didn’t say anythin about scarin you. You really wanna believe that nothing matters, you can head home. Or” he points to a nearby rock, “you go get on your hands and knees, facin the cliffs.”

Indrid crawls gracelessly to the designated spot. It’s dangerous to turn his back on the ocean, but a gentle voice in his mind reminds him over and over that Duck is here. Duck won’t let him get hurt. 

There’s a splash as Duck pulls himself onto the rock. Then a whoosh of air and a sting in the right side of his ass. He yelps, startled, and looks behind him.

“If this ain’t okay, need you to say so now.” Duck’s eyes are wide and hungry, but his hands stay on the grey rock. 

“It’s okay.” He can’t believe this is happening, can’t decide if he should tell Duck this is not remotely a punishment. 

Another sharp grin, “Eyes front.”

Indrid’s barely obeyed when the next strike comes. Duck is strong and makes no attempt to hide it, hitting him hard enough that his knees jolt forward in the sand. The pain lights him up each time, forces the thing knotted in his chest up towards his throat. 

When the blows stop he whimpers, pushing his ass back in hopes of more.

“Don’t worry, ‘Drid, I ain’t done with you by a long shot.” Cold fingers undo his fly, bring his pants and underwear down to his thighs. He’s expecting another hit, wiggles his ass in anticipation. 

What he gets are teeth sinking into his skin.

“AH!GOD” He yells loud enough that his throat hurts.

Duck chuckles, “Holler all you want, we both know no one can hear what goes on on this beach, especially with all the wind.” He bites down again, Indrid thrashing and moaning as teeth sink into already reddened skin. Duck growls in reply, savaging the meat of his as and grazing his teeth along his thighs, dangerously close to his balls. He’s already getting hard, the process expedited by warm breath and lips on his body. 

He moans embarrassingly loud when Duck shoves his ass apart.

“Damn, you really did get all prepped for that fella. Shame, he didn’t know what he was missin.” The plug hits the sand to his right.

“You, you don��t have to flatter meEEEoh, oh Duckohmygoodness.” His fingers dig into the sand as the merman teases his rim with a flexible tongue. There’s a muffled laugh, but Duck doesn’t respond beyond that, too busy threatening him with a good time as his tongue gives an experimental push. 

Then it retreats and he turns his head left and right, delivering quick bites to either cheek before his tongue returns. He alternates between the delicious, teasing licks and painful bites, the shift never coming when Indrid expects and causing him to cry out every time. When the mer releases one side of his ass in order to slap his thighs while he continues licking, kissing, and nipping his way across bruised, sensitive skin, Indrid lets out a strangled sound, the thing in his chest now trapped at the back of his throat. 

“You make such cute noises, but they ain’t the ones I’m lookin for. I ain’t stoppin until you apologize.”

Indrid opens his mouth, intending to say something about how this is the wrong way to make him do so. 

“I, I’m sorry, I’m so sorry, please don’t be angry with me, don’t leave, don’t leave me here, I can’t, I, I don’t want to think about it, Duck please, I’m sorry, so sorry” he;s hunched forward, sobbing into the sand, when he realizes he’s fully clothed and Duck isn’t behind him.

“No” he squeaks, “no please don’t go.”

“I ain’t goin anywhere.” Duck slides up the sand next to him, pulls him into his arms, “I’m so sorry darlin, I didn’t mean to make you cry, I took it too far, I ain’t mad, not really” he eases Indrid’s glasses off and sets them out of harms way, “oh darlin, c’mere, it’s okay” salty kisses dot his forehead and green scales pet his legs. 

“It’s, hic, it’s not your fault. I, I l-liked it, but this has, hic, been building up for months. Years.” He hides his face in Duck’s chest.

“Years?” Duck grabs Indrid’s sweater from where he cast it off, draping it over the human. 

Indrid sniffs, “You know I’m a photographer. But I’ve never told you what I photograph. I, I made my name recording disasters and their aftermath. For a long time I took pride in it; someone has to document those things, so we can’t erase them, so we have to confront them and try to make things better, or try to keep such tragedy from reoccurring. I was so good at recording it I became famous. Wealthy. And I learned that most people like to gawk at horror and then go about their days. I, I tried branching out and...and I ended up with a disaster anyway. A bridge collapse, I chronicled everything from the instant it started to the funerals and it, it was too much. Ever since then I’ve felt trapped by my work. At times, by my life. My agent wants me to go back for the fifth anniversary, he told me so last night.”

“You ain’t goin, right?” 

“I don’t think I can.” 

Duck nods, rests his chin atop his head, “tell me what you wanna do instead.”

He does. He tells him about his other art, about the pitches for childrens books and the plans for a real vacation, about the life that, for the first time, feels in reach when he speaks about it. By the time he’s done the stars are out and he’s much calmer and clear-headed.

“Did you mean what you said earlier? That, that you thought I was attractive?”

“Every damn word.” Duck rolls them so Indrid is on his back, kisses his cheek, “thought so since that first night. But, uh” his gaze flicks down to Indrid’s crotch, “if you want more proof I’m happy to give it.”

“Please?”

“Get your pants off and lay on your sweater.”

Indrid complies, shivers when Duck guides his shirt up and off. 

“Fuuuuck” the mer rubs his hands up and down his torso, “when it warms up, you’re gonna swim out with me so I can get my fill of this while you ride my dick.”

“Yes. Ah, I, I did prep, but it’s been long enough now that lubrication may be an issueOOOh, ooohyes.” He release into the sand as Duck grinds his tail against his cock. The scales feel as lovely now as they do when he pets them, and he wonders if Duck will let him get off by humping his tail one of these days.

“It won’t, trust me. Lemme just--there we go. Open your legs. Heh, eager little thing.”

“I’ve wanted this too long to play coy.”

“Good.”

“Eeep!” Something slick and squirming presses into his ass, “do, do you have tentacles?”

“Kinda? They’re just the tip, for this exact reason. It, uh, it feel okay?” Duck smiles reassuringly and that, combined with the genuine concern in his voice makes Indrid moans and nudge him closer. 

“VeryOH, oohgracious” two more tentacles join the first, pulsing and scissoring him open, “how many are there?”

“About eight.”

He moans louder and Duck laughs, pushes his hips forward, “glad you like it, darlin’. Because from where I’m sittin your ass is fuckin amazin and I wanna be as deep in it as I can.”

“Yes, absolutely, pleaseAHHnnn” enough tentacles now that he can’t keep an accurate count, “please use it as you see fit.”

“As I see fit huh? That’s a tricky question. See, sometimes I wanna, fuck, wanna shove the whole thing in you at once and make you scream while I leave my mark on your neck.”

“AHHnnngod” A firmer shaft pushes in, ridges rubbing all the right places as the tentacles continue exploring him. 

“Other times, think it’s better to tease you with the tip, maybe make you blow me first and jerk you off until you’re beggin for my dick.”

“Yes, yesyesyesyes”

“But tonight” Duck bottoms out with a groan, “I’m gonna take it nice and slow, show you just how fuckin wonderful you are. How much you mean to me. My Indrid.”

“Yours” Indrid twines his limbs around him, “god, Duck, it feels so good, you’re so good, you always look after me.”

“That I do. Because you deserve it. And” the tentacles find his prostate and he nearly howls as Duck continues, “you deserve to learn how t’be nice to yourself. And I, ahfuck, know that ain’t easy, but I’m gonna be here to help.”

“Yes, ohgod, yes, you’re, you’re so perfect, aaAAAhnI, I’m, close sweetheart, you fill me so well.”

“Damn right. Gonna, nnngh, gonna find every fuckin way to fill you, make you feel fuckin amazin, fuck, that’s it darlin, ohfuckyeah” as he starts spilling into him, Indrid cums with a shout, splattering their stomachs. Duck moans at the sight, wriggles his hips as his shaft continues rippling and pulsing. It turns out mer orgasms are long, so long that Indrid is whimpering from overstimulation by the time Duck pulls out. 

A gentle, salt-soaked kiss to his lips, “Lookit you, took it all. You’re so good for me, darlin.”

“Mmmhmm” He doesn’t want to let go, cold, wind, and damp be damned. Duck seems to understand, holds him and whispers sweet promises in his ears until he’s shivering.

“‘Drid, your teeth are chatterin.”

“I kn-know, I s-should g-go home and w-warm up.”

Duck kisses him again, “sooner you go and rest, sooner we can do this again.”

“An excellent p-point.” He stands, blows a shaky kiss towards his future, “see you tomorrow.”

[shintorikhazumi]

I Hate You.

A/N: I guess this is thanks for the warm welcome to your server? Akko-centric angst? @blee-bleep I saw one of your posts, haha.

Wait… doesn’t Akko get bullied in canon?

Also, to everyone else in the server who sees this, I don’t quite know your preferences for a fic, but hmu some time haha

Sorry for feeding you some subpar writing owo

Enjoy?

~Shintori Khazumi

 [I hate you.]

You mentally say to the girl in the mirror. Her hair is tussled, deep brown stained with the same bitter red on her fresh white shirt.

[I hate you.]

You tell the short teen, bags under her eyes, maybe from the lack of sleep. She looks pale, ugly. So ugly.

[I hate you.]

She looks like she hasn’t eaten in days, even though she binged full tubs of ice-cream, and stuffed a few cakes in barely three hours ago. All of them had gone to waste anyway. Trash bins, toilets, sometimes the woods. Perfect for throwing away stuff you don’t need. Or well… throwing up stuff you don’t need. In your body.

[I hate you.]

Through the reflective material allows her glimpses of stacks of papers marred red with E’s and F’s, and some barely passing grades, and that single A from language class.

At least professor Pisces seemed to appreciate her, that girl. Someone had to. Because you hated the girl in the mirror.

What a fool, what an idiot. How stupid, how dumb.

[I hate you.]

Her and her slow mind, incapable of comprehending the simplest things, disabled from casting the most basic magic-

Oh, but that isn’t her fault, now is it?

It was hers. Chariot du nord. The person she so idolizes, the witch who gave her her dream- and subsequently crushed it to dust.

The mentor she admires.

The mother she needed within the academy.

The one who betrayed her the most.

[I hate you.]

Hate the one who trusts blindly, the one who trusts in all the wrong things.

Hands reach up to a slim neck, almost hesitant to touch it. They wrap themselves around it. It’s cold, but there’s a pulse. It’s cold, yet she feels drenched in sweat. It’s cold… like her gaze.

She just needs to squeeze-

“Akko? We’re back and- what… happened to your arm?”

Lotte. You love her. You love her a lot. She’s sweet, smells like butterscotch and honey-lemon tea. She’s holding a plastic bag, school supplies? Yes. Looks like it.

“I was cutting open a package from home. The cutter slipped.” Lotte looks like she wants to believe you. But she doesn’t.

“Right, of course.”

“I’m telling the truth, Lotte. Look.” You point to the half-opened box on the floor that’s surprisingly actually there. Maybe you weren’t lying after all.

“I see, okay. I believe you Akko.”

You hate the fact that she may think you’re a liar. You love her, but you hate that.

Sucy walks into the room right after Lotte does. She says nothing other than the usual dull greeting, handing you a random mushroom.

Strange.

But that’s normal. Strange is normal for Sucy.

And you love that about her.

She doesn’t pry, she doesn’t act out of line, she only does what she’s supposed to… alongside other things.

But she never pushes it with you.

And you love that. You love the freedom and the space she gives you. The lack of interrogation.

Lotte bandages you up soon after, the antiseptic is supposed to sting, but… it doesn’t. Maybe it’s the many times you’ve been through this. You’ve grown numb. Immune to little stings. They’re nothing but ant bites.

They’re nothing compared to…

Lotte’s hand on your cheek pulls you out of your thoughts. She’s smiling kindly, no questions, no interrogations- well maybe one question.

“Are you hungry? Let’s grab some dinner.”

You nod. You tell her you’ll just get changed, and she and Sucy reluctantly leave you to your devices.

You say reluctantly because Lotte won’t stop throwing glances at you on her way out.

Sheesh. You’ll be fine.

You say that as you change out of your bloodied clothes.

You head to the wardrobe, you open it and find the mess that you call your… well, clothes. You need to do a bit of digging to find the perfect wear. Something thick, something dark, something long.

A long black hoody sounds perfect.

You wear it over matching joggers and face the mirror once more. You feel bile climb up your throat at the site of her. You hate her.

[I hate you.]

Her and her messy ass.

Her and her disgruntled look, and unkempt hair.

[I hate you.]

Red eyes. Bloody. So bloody. Bloodshot? Her eyes look like they would murder someone. That’s not very nice. You hate that. You hate her.

She’s not very nice.

There’s a breeze that wafts into your room. It’s chilly. It tells you that the window is open.

Ah.

The curtain is fluttering, it’s outstretching its hand, inviting you in.

Come now.

It’s alluring, white as snow.

The sun is gone, it’s left you like everyone else. You’re not likeable enough to have someone stay by your side.

You look back to the mirror. You see her, she looks lifeless, emotionless.

But wait- there’s… there’s fear in her eyes.

She’s afraid. You hate that. You hate her. She doesn’t deserve to feel fear, to have it reflected in her soul.

Ah.

You punched her. You didn’t mean to, but you did. But she fights back, it seems. Your hands… they’re… bleeding hands. There are cracked fragments of glass at your feet, and shards in your knuckles.

She’s evil.

She’s very much evil and you hate her.

She hurts you.

She hurts you all the time and you hate her because she hurts you so.

But she’s gone now.

You’ve punched her.

You no longer see her.

Her ugly face.

Her pale demeanor.

Her dying pallor.

Her idiotic expressions.

Nothing.

That makes you happy.

You can go to dinner now, yes.

Which… which way was it?

Oh, the curtain tells you it’s this way.

Here. Come here.

It’s cool, it’s fresh… it’s…

That’s deep.

The ground is far. Quite far.

It’s perfect.

You stand on the ledge.

It’s hard, stable.

Great.

You think of her one last time.

You hated her, but she deserves some parting words.

Maybe then her spirit wouldn’t be bound should she be dead as of now.

“I hate you.” You whisper once to the wind.

The wind carries it back.

That’s right.

“I hate you.”

The moon smiles.

You smile back.

I hate you.            

I hate you just like everyone else does. The girls who threw away your drinking water after PE, the ones who put tacks in your shoes. The ones who hid your books and got you in trouble with Finneran.

Yes. Just like them all…

You thought it would get better for her.

But you were wrong.

You believed.

And you were stabbed, face-front, in the heart.

So stupid.

It never gets better.

Not for her. Not for you.

“I hate you. You idiot… You utterly, completely, MORONIC idiot.”

…

“I hate you... you and your stupid. STUPID. Believing heart.”

And you finally take that first step-

The door bursts wide open, slamming against the very wall it is attached to.

Ahhh… look at that beauty.

Fair-snow skin, gorgeous curled locks. Even through puffs of cold, cold air, you see cherry pink lips. They look so warm. Warm like her eyes, their feelings a stark contrast to that blue hue. Justice is there, kindness is there. Loyalty, bravery, beauty, talent… she has everything.

She has everything you love.

She is everything you love.

Ah that thought… you love that.

You love her.

So much.

So damn much.

“Diana…” You finally croak out.

“I hate me.”

She cries. You hate her tears. You hate yourself even more. You want to take your other foot and step out the next step, but…

“And yet, I Love You… Akko.”

A/N: Was that okay? I mean, no. Akko is not okay. Not okay. Hahaha. Yet.

Reactions are welcome.

~Shintori Khazumi