#and also fucking listen for your name! and if you didn’t get your crepe say something sooner than when you’ve been waiting for an hour!

[teabookgremlin]

usually my boss is so good at managing the schedule and we’re well staffed or even over staffed but yesterday was so hellish

[moldisgoodforyou]

rome (v)

wordcount: 8.2k oops

warnings: smut !! like a lot i'm a tiny bit embarrassed. also angst at the end !!

______

“You didn’t.”

Rafe gave her an apologetic smile as their train pulled out from the station in Florence, outside slowly blurring as the train picked up speed. “I think I might have.”

She let him be completely in charge of the transportation, hotels, everything - which turned out to be a terrible mistake, seeing as he’d never traveled on his own before (and had never planned anything in his life). She’d had to amend most of their plans already , as he just purchased without thinking of any logistics. Instead of buying a train ticket directly to Rome, he’d accidentally bought two tickets. One leg of the ride went an hour and a half to Pisa, then the other leg sent them on a four hour train ride along the western coast of Italy to Rome.

The two had nearly missed their fourth alarm, sleeping through the other three, and had to scramble out of bed with Sophie nearly in tears in order to throw their things into their suitcases and make it to the train on time. Rafe bought tickets in advance, like usual, but Sophie had forgotten to check over them once they printed from the kiosk and they hopped on their train just in time. After shoving their luggage onto the rack and returning to Sophie half-asleep in their seats, he realized his mistake when he re-read their tickets.

She sat up and rubbed her eyes blearily, frowning as she inspected the ticket and confirmed his confession. “How did you even manage that? There’s a direct transport to Rome.”

“I don’t know, the page was all in Italian! I don’t know Italian!” He defended, looking more and more worried by the second.

“Okay, baby, it’s okay. You’re fine.” She sighed. “Not the end of the world.”

“You’re stressed.”

“I’m not stressed.”

“You’re definitely stressed.”

“I’m a little stressed.” She admitted, handing the tickets back to him. “We also got back to the hostel at 3am and nearly missed the train and you got kissed by a random boy last night even though I didn’t listen to you when you said he was flirting and -”

“Hey.” He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her into his side, pressing a kiss to the top of her head. “And I’m fine, and we’re both on the train, it’ll just take us a little longer to get there. We’re fine. Okay?”

“We’re fine.” She repeated like she was trying to convince herself, nodding. “We’re fine.”

“Exactly. Now I think you need to sleep, angel, at least until we get to Pisa. I can find us some breakfast.”

She lifted her head to squint at him. “Sorry, say that again?”

“You need to sleep?”

“No. The city we’re going to.”

“...Pisa?” He repeated, pronouncing it like “pie-za.”

Sophie shook her head. “Pisa, baby. Try again.”

He scoffed, pronouncing it his way again. “It’s definitely Pisa, Soph.”

“...Okay. You go around telling people you went to Pie-za, that’s fine with me.” She shook her head, settling back into his side. “Can you scratch my back?”

(It only took her a few minutes to fall asleep but she was pretty sure she heard him using Google Translate to see how Pisa was actually supposed to be pronounced when he thought she was sleeping.)

When they finally made it to Pisa, Rafe nudged Sophie awake and pretended not to notice when she swiped a tiny spot of drool away from her cheek. They were both starving and made the thirty minute walk to the Leaning Tower of Pisa just for kicks in their layover - she made him stop to buy her some overpriced crepes from a market stand along the way.

They were both extra tired when they returned to the train, tucking into each other’s side and using Sophie’s jean jacket as a makeshift blanket. He played with her hair idly, watching her as she was about to fall asleep again. “Soph?”

She shifted, trying to stay awake. “Yeah?”

“Are you tired of traveling?” He asked tentatively. “Like, are you ready to go home?”

“I think those are two different things.” She lifted her head a little to check over his expression. “Why?”

“I don’t know, just.” He started, shrugging, but only continued when she nodded to prompt him further. “You seem so much more confident here, you seem happier to me. If living here is something you’d want to do, I’d want you to consider that.” He rubbed the back of his neck, nervous for her reply. “Even if that means we would be apart for a little bit again.”

Sophie sat up completely so she could look him in the eye. “I love traveling, I really do. But I’ve also been homesick for three months - I miss my family, much more than I thought I would, I missed you like hell, and I miss having a routine.” She bit the inside of her cheek so she wouldn’t frown. “I haven’t been home to the Outer Banks since Christmas, and it’s August. That’s ages.”

He nodded and leaned forward, kissing her forehead. “I can go home with you, if you’d like? For the week before we have to go back to start school?”

“You’d do that? Even if you have to see your dad?”

“Yeah, of course I would.” He smiled, stroking his thumb over her cheekbone. She leaned into his touch, closing her eyes for a moment. “I love you.”

“Love you too.”

“I’m glad you think I seem confident, because I have no idea what I’m doing half the time.” She smiled. “I feel much better with you around, I don’t think you realize how many days I cried when I first made it to Spain.”

He frowned, wrapping his arms around her and pulling her close. “I don’t like hearing that. I hate it when you cry.”

“Sweet boy.” She grinned, lifting her head to nudge her lips against his chin. “I’m okay. You need sleep, you’re going soft on me.”

“Remind me how long my mistake is?”

“Four hours. We both need sleep and I can’t sleep if you’re moving around. We get to Rome around two.” She yawned, tucking her knees to her chest to keep herself warm. “Then you need a shower, you still smell a little bit like the club from last night.”

“Rude.” He leaned back anyways so she could be more comfortable. “G’night, angel.”

“Morning.” She corrected, seconds away from sleep.

He laughed, lowering his voice to a whisper. “Good morning.”

The train ride was fairly uneventful - every half hour or so, one of them would wake the other up for entertainment or to point out the window at a pretty view. At one point Rafe suggested they join the mile-high club - but for trains, aptly named by him as the “rail tail club” - she just glared at him and crossed her arms to go back to sleep.

They took advantage of the WiFi to cancel their hostel stay and actually move to a hotel instead - after what happened in Florence, Sophie decided they didn’t need the experience of making new friends. Rafe had to slyly hide the full bill from her when she asked how much it was. (He felt a little guilty seeing the relief on her face when he said it was cheaper than expected, but he swore he’d never put her through financial stress as long as he lived.)

When they finally arrived and walked the ten blocks to the hotel - with suitcases in tow, dodging other tourists and locals in the street - Rafe stripped off his clothes the second they walked into their hotel room. Sophie paused, watching him with amusement as the door clicked shut behind them. “What on earth are you doing?”

“I feel so gross.” He confessed, peeling off his socks and shoving off his shorts. “Why didn’t you make me shower last night?”

“You were drunk, baby, I had to haul you to the metro station.” She followed him into the bathroom and he turned in the shower, shutting the door so steam would fill the room. He raised his eyebrows. “You coming in or are you just gonna watch?”

“I’m too tired for sex.” She told him, hopping up to sit on the counter. He leaned over and gave her a quick kiss. “Okay. So let’s just shower.”

“Just shower? You gonna stick to that?” She let him tease the hem of her shirt up, slowly.

“Just shower. Please? I’ll wash your hair.” He encouraged, pressing a kiss to her forehead before turning to get in the shower.

“Hm.”

“I’ll wash your tits.”

He grinned when she gasped and reached out to swat his butt, making him jump before he stepped into the shower. “Or not! Whatever you’d like!”

She rolled her eyes and stripped down, joining him a few moments later. “You have a dirty mouth. I can’t let you keep getting away with that.”

He smirked, stepping close. “What are you gonna do about it? Punish me?”

“You’d like that, wouldn’t you?” She challenged, backing him against the shower wall. He tried his best to hold back a laugh at how cute she looked, trying to seem all intimidating. “Yeah. You know I would.”

She leaned up for a kiss and he leaned down, eyes closing - until she suddenly pinched his nipple, twisting it. “Ow! Sophie!”

She cracked up laughing, getting under the shower spray and handed him the shampoo. “Wash my hair. I’m hungry, let’s go find food.”

“So demanding.” He complained, accepting the shampoo. “Turn around.”

“I said we’re not having sex -”

“I said turn around, not bend over.” He swapped places with her in the shower and started shampooing her hair carefully, adding the perfect amount of pressure and making sure he didn’t tangle her hair. She moaned quietly and he paused abruptly. “Sophie. Do not.”

“Rafe, keep going.” She whined, pressing her head back into his hand.

He grumbled, continuing his shampooing. “Quit making noises.”

“I can’t help it, it feels so good - hey!” She squeaked, whipping around to glare at him when he tugged on her hair at her scalp. “What the fuck!”

“You’re saying everything you say during sex!”

“Are you just constantly horny?” She scowled at him and shoved at his chest.

“Yes, you aren’t?” He argued, stepping aside so she could rinse her hair. She got under the shower spray to rinse and kept glaring at him until she squeezed some shampoo into her palm. “No. Come here.”

He ducked down a little so she could reach, humming contentedly as she ran her fingers through his strands. “Baby.”

“What.” She kept up her faux-anger, but wasn’t really too annoyed with him - he knew it, too.

“I love you.”

She softened, pressing a kiss to his shoulder as she continued to massage his head. “Love you too. Even if you are horny as hell.”

He laughed and accepted her little nudge under the shower so he could rinse her hair. “The showerhead is detachable…”

She looked him over, debating, but her stomach rumbled in protest. “I’m starving. Can’t you get yourself off? You did that just fine without me for three months, I’m sure.”

He laughed, leaning down to kiss her shortly. “I did, but it is criminal that we never had FaceTime sex.”

She raised her eyebrows. “My apartment walls were way too thin, and you definitely would have been caught at Colin’s house.” She reached down to run the tip of her finger under the length of his cock, grinning when it twitched. “Enjoy. I’m gonna get ready.”

“Sophie, baby -” He protested, reaching for her, but she just blew him a kiss and got out of the shower. She’d learned that quickies didn’t exist with Rafe, and if she started something in the shower it would be taken out to the bed, then probably go back to the shower afterward.

(She did her makeup in the bathroom just so she could hear his little groans - ones that he definitely played up for her.)

After going to dinner, and getting lost on their way back, they were both thoroughly exhausted for all their walking and their travels. When they crawled into bed after their showers, Sophie snuggled into his side, resting her head on his chest. “Hey, Rafe.”

“Mm?” He hummed, half-asleep already.

“Do you have any special requests for your birthday tomorrow?”

He smirked, sleepy. “Yeah, you wanna wake me up with sex?”

“Like, actually?”

He raised his eyebrows. “You’d do that?”

She shrugged. “If you want.”

He laughed, pressing a kiss to the top of her head. “I mean, yeah, I wouldn’t complain. But just spending the day with you is more than enough.”

“Alright. What time were you born?”

“Uh…” He furrowed his brow. “7:12 am, I think. My mom used to wake me up for my birthday at that time on the dot, every year.”

“Aw. That’s sweet.” She typed something into her phone, then nodded. “Oh, you’re a Virgo rising. That makes so much sense.”

He frowned, sitting up a little. “I’m not a virgin, we had sex two days ago.”

Sophie giggled, not bothering to explain - she’d attempted to before when she was first getting into astrology, and he had just told her he didn’t believe in witches. “Has it been that long?”

“If that’s long to you, baby, I can’t even imagine how difficult three months was.” He quipped, closing his eyes and lying back down.

She rolled her eyes. “Good night. Love you.”

“Love you too.” He murmured, wrapping his arms around her and hugging her close.

The next morning, Sophie woke up and managed to slip out from Rafe’s side, ignoring his grumble and half-hearted, still-asleep attempt to keep her at his side. She went into the bathroom and brushed her teeth then changed into some new lingerie, feeling a little ridiculous, but hoped it’d be worth it. When she returned to the bed, she crawled on top of him, rocking her hips gently against his hard on. “Baby.” She whispered, trailing a finger down his chest.

He stirred only for a moment but pressed his hips up against hers. “Fuck, Sophie, more,” he said and she nearly laughed at his dream mumblings. She ducked down under the covers and kissed along his length, rubbing him gently over his boxers. He woke up just as she was pulling his boxers down, thoroughly confused. “Soph?”

“Good morning. Happy birthday.” She told him with a grin before taking him into her mouth, pushing on his thighs a little when he jerked in surprise.

“Am I still dreaming?” He muttered, pushing back the covers so he could see her head. She licked directly up the underside of his cock, tracing a vein with her tongue. “Nope. Not dreaming.”

“Holy shit.” He breathed out, watching her with wide eyes. “I don’t think I’m gonna last.”

“That’s okay, we can fuck again.” She grinned up at him before taking as much of him as she could into her mouth again, moaning around him. His eyes rolled back in his head and he gathered up her hair carefully. “Fuckin - fuck, angel, faster, please.”

She obeyed, moving her mouth and hand just a little faster. It wasn’t long until he was spilling into her and she swallowed, then kissed back up his body. “Hey.”

“Hey -” He breathed out, jaw hanging open, then stopped. “Wait, what are you wearing?” He took her in with a grin and grabbed his glasses off the nightstand table to get a better view of her, wanting to see her in her full glory. “Is that new?”

She laughed, tugging at her bra strap self-consciously. “Yeah. Thought I could save it as a special birthday surprise for you.”

“Holy fuck, Sophie.” He scrambled for his phone. “I need, like, a picture to remember this or something -”

She was turning red from all his compliments and covered her hand with her face as she whined. “Rafeeee.”

He tugged one hand away, grinning at her. “Please? Just one? Or more than one?”

“Um...okay. Fine. Where do you want me?”

His jaw dropped and he gaped at her, incredulous. “You’re serious? You’ll let me? For real, that’s actually okay with you?”

She bit her lip, smiling. “Yes. As long as you keep it in a locked folder on your phone.”

“Oh my god. I’m in heaven. Is this my birthday present, the lingerie? Or the pictures?” He leaned up to kiss her, needy, and groaned as she rocked against his hips to lean forward.

She pushed him back a little, rolling her eyes. “No, you have a real present.” She stuck her chest out, adjusting the bra so her breasts were nearly spilling out of it, and fluffed up her hair a little. “Snap away, Cameron.”

He paused, waiting for another nod from her, then started taking photos, his eyes blown wide. He reached up and ran his thumb over her lips - she bit down on it gently, smirking at his expression. Rafe groaned just as he looked at her adoringly. “You’re incredible. Beautiful. I need to tell you that more.”

“Shut up.” She blushed more, letting her hair fall in front of her face.

He drank the sight of her in, lingerie and all, then set his phone aside. Abruptly, he grabbed at her thighs to pull her up and she squeaked, caught off guard and fell forward onto him. “Rafe!”

“Come here. Sit on my face.” He commanded, dropping his head back to the pillow.

She pushed herself up to straddle his hips again, wearing an incredulous expression. “You’re insane. I’m not doing that.”

He laughed darkly and curled a possessive hand around her thigh, digging his fingers into her leg just enough. “Yes, you are. Come up here. I need you.”

She could feel her cheeks getting hot from his demanding tone, the way he was taking control. “Rafe, it’s your birthday. Let me just take care of you.”

“You did take care of me, now it’s my turn.” He moved his hand up her leg to rub across her clothed clit, grinning when she gasped and twitched at his touch. “Like you said, it’s my birthday, and what I want you to do is sit on my face. C’mon, baby. I know you’re just dripping for it, absolutely filthy -”

For a moment she nearly considered climbing up on his face right then and there just to get him to shut up, but got too shy and felt her face burning with embarrassment. “You can’t just say things like that.”

“No? You don’t like it?” He continued rubbing slow circles across her clit and grinned when she shifted onto his thigh and moaned. “Hm, that’s what I thought.”

“Rafe.” She protested weakly, her resolve thinning quickly as he flexed his thigh and pushed against her.

“You know what I want my present to be?” He asked.

She started grinding slow against his thigh, trying her best to keep her gaze locked on him. “Hm?”

“I want to make you come. Three times. I know I can, too.”

“I already got you a present.” She mumbled weakly, rocking against him a little faster as her brain began to cloud over. When he shifted a little and flexed his thigh again, she gasped, leaning forward a tiny bit.

He reached up and pushed one cup of her bra down, gripping her breast roughly and pinching her nipple. She bit her lip hard to keep quiet and he shook his head right away. “I want to hear you.”

“Someone’s going to hear.” She protested, whining quietly.

“Let them. I want everyone to know how good I can make you feel.” He shot back.

“We’re gonna get kicked out for a noise complaint.” She argued, rocking her hips a little faster.

“Good. I’ll know I’m doing my job right.”

“Trust me, that’s not an issue,” she muttered darkly, circling her hips on his leg. When she came, whining, she practically collapsed onto him, so sensitive she had to move so his leg wasn’t between hers anymore.

He didn’t care and flipped them over quickly, shoving the sheets down the bed and dragged her panties down and off her legs. “So fucking pretty. Look at you, all wet, you’re so desperate for me, aren’t you?”

“You are on something today, where’s all this coming from?” She shook her head, even though his dirty words had her turned on more than she ever thought they would.

He grinned and kissed up her inner thigh, spreading her legs apart. “You love it.”

“Hm. Do I?”

Rafe moved up to kiss her lips, then down her jaw, then to nip at her throat, although she certainly didn’t need the foreplay. He pulled teasingly on the ends of her hair, a little harder than usual, and stopped abruptly to look up at her when she moaned. “Oh, I forgot, you like it a little rougher, yeah?” He asked in a taunting tone.

She rolled her eyes as she blushed, thoroughly embarrassed by his teasing. “I mean. I wouldn’t mind.”

He paused, thinking. “Do you have anything specific you want to try?”

Sophie didn’t hesitate in responding, knowing she’d chicken out if she didn’t just say it. “Did you pack a tie?”

“...a tie? What for?” He shuffled out of bed, confused, but rifled through his suitcase until he found a nice silk tie, all wrinkled from being forgotten in a spare pocket. He tossed it at her but she held it out. “I can’t tie it myself.”

“Where’s it going?”

She bit her lip as she raised both hands above her head, her wrists pressed together. “Here? But not to the bed, I think that’d be too much.”

He gaped at her for the third time that morning. “You’re sure? You want that?”

“Yeah, is that okay?”

“Yes! Yes. Just unexpected, okay. Okay. We need, like, a safe word or something right, this is some fifty shades shit - is this gonna hurt you? Or fuck, do you want it to hurt?“

She held back a laugh, finding his rambling endearing. “It’s a silk J.Crew tie, baby, not rope. It’s okay. I’ll tell you to stop if I need it.”

“Right. Right. Have you done this before? You seem a little too chill about it.” He put the tie around her wrists hesitantly in a loose knot, making sure she was comfortable before he settled himself back between her legs.

Sophie gave him a little smile, blushing. “No, I just. Thought I might like it and I trust you.”

“Okay, so let me get this straight - you won’t sit on my face but you’ll let me tie you up?”

“It’s different.” She tried closing her legs but he pushed them back open and nipped at her thigh. “Hey. Behave.”

“Yeah? What if I don’t?” She challenged him with a grin, and he just shook his head and teased a finger across her entrance. “Trouble.”

“Rafe.”

“Yeah?” He moved impossibly slow, rubbing two gentle fingers over her clit - she squirmed under him, letting out a little whine. “No teasing.”

“Hm, I think I’m going to tease all I want, with you all tied up. Can’t take control like that.”

She groaned, blinking at him. “I’m already wet, I don’t need to be edged.”

He grinned up at her. “I love it when you talk dirty to me.”

“S’hardly dirty.” She countered, gasping when he caught her off guard with a wide lick up her entrance. “Fuck - I -” She started helplessly as she went to grab his hair, but just had to squirm instead with her hands above her head.

“Do we have plans today?” He questioned, breathing hot air on her clit as he slipped two fingers inside her and curled them toward herself.

“Not til later - oh, there, please -”

Rafe repeated his motions and flicked his tongue across her clit. “What are we doing?”

“Can we not discuss this now?” She argued breathlessly.

“Why, can’t concentrate?” He glanced up, amused. When she went to answer, he just sucked on her clit, making her gasp. “Answer the question, angel.”

“Rafe - fuckin’ - please -” She bit out, unable to think straight. “I’m so close, baby, more -”

He swore there was nothing he loved more than when she’d call him pet names, and the whine certainly added to it. Instead of teasing more, he curled his fingers again and flicked his tongue across her clit, working her through her second orgasm. She’d abandoned all pretense of keeping quiet and gasped out for him, arching her back as she came. When he withdrew his fingers and crawled back up the bed to press them against her lips, she took them easily.

“You are way too fucking good at that.” She breathed out, trying to grab for him again, but cursed when she remembered she was still tied up.

He reached up and untied her with a grin. “You okay? Did it feel alright?”

“Yeah, of course. Though I’m not sure I like not being able to touch you.” She smiled as he pressed gentle kisses to the inside of her wrists.

“Dunno, I think I like when you’re not ripping my hair out when you come.” He grinned, nudging his nose against hers.

She rolled her eyes. “You love that.” She took on a mocking tone, making her voice deeper to imitate him. “Pull my hair, baby - oh, fuck, yes -”

“Hey! I don’t sound like that.” He laughed. “Your sex noises are more embarrassing, anyways, all whiny.”

“They are not embarrassing -”

“You want to record them and see?” He raised his eyebrows, challenging her.

She blushed, shaking her head. “No. Absolutely not. You missed your chance for that the second you came here to see me.”

“Shame. Kind of unfair though, because you definitely got a voice memo or two.”

Sophie rolled her eyes. “I’m pretty sure you sent one to me every time you jacked off, that was much more than just one or two. Took my invitation and ran with it.”

He laughed, then reached around and unclipped her bra, pulling it off and tossing it aside, then rested his head next to hers on the pillow. “I love you. So fucking much.”

“Happy birthday.” She smiled. “Love you too, sweet boy.”

He grinned, kissing her sweetly, then stroked his thumb over her cheekbone. “We’re not done yet. I promised you three times.”

She laughed. “Alright, just give me a second to catch my breath.”

Rafe raised his eyebrows with a smirk. “I’m that good, huh?”

She shoved at his shoulder, shaking her head. “You are too damn cocky for your own good. Oh! Here, let me get your present.” She hopped out of bed and pulled out a gift bag from her suitcase, all smushed down and wrinkled, and handed it to him. “Sorry it’s a mess, I had to pack it before you came.”

He sat up with an eager grin, pulling the covers over his lap. “S’okay, I’m sure it’s great.”

She pulled her underwear back on and pulled on a big shirt of his before crawling back into bed, watching him with a smile.

He unwrapped the gift and pulled out a leather jacket, whistling. “Wow! This is awesome, Sophie.”

She beamed, practically bouncing with excitement. “It’s custom fit to your measurements - I had Colin measure that jacket you always wear to be sure - and it’s ethically made. Well, as ethical as you can get with leather, but it’s handmade by this family in Barcelona, so there’s practically no carbon footprint. It’s neutral, at least. No sweatshops or anything.”

He wasn’t quite sure what all of that meant, but grinned at her enthusiasm. “It’s perfect, baby, thank you.”

“Happy birthday.”

Rafe held it up, looking at all the details, then he caught a glimpse of the tag and frowned. It was $300 - he wasn’t sure he wanted to know how many hours of work that was for her paycheck. “Sophie.”

“Just pretend you didn’t see!” She tucked it back in the jacket quickly, wincing.

“I swear this is a double standard...” He started, but decided not to finish his argument - the last thing he wanted to do with her on his birthday was fight about money.

“Don’t care. Let me treat you.” She beamed as he ran his fingers over the leather.

“You never let me treat you.”

Sophie raised her eyebrows and held up her hand with the ring as if to make her point, raising her eyebrows. “Never?”

“That was different, that’s a gift.” He pointed out.

“Yeah, so’s this. C’mon, put it on.”

“What? I’m all sweaty.”

“Just for a little bit.” She pleaded, pushing it toward him. “Please? I want a picture.”

“Oh, so you get nudes too? I thought that was a special birthday present.” He raised his eyebrows, challenging her, and she giggled. “The jacket is the present. Rafe, please?”

He made a show out of huffing and rolling his eyes but held out his hand, sitting up. She grinned and handed it to him, grabbing her phone when he shrugged it on. “Okay, lay back?”

“You’re directing me? Okay.” He laid back in bed, completely naked except for the jacket, his hand tucked behind his head. She beamed and climbed up on the bed to stand over him, just wearing his big t-shirt and her underwear, and arranged the sheets so they were just covering his dick, his chest on full display and his hip and thigh peeking out suggestively.

“Okay. Don’t smile.” She held her phone up high to get the right angle, laughing when he smirked up at her. “You’re so fucking hot.”

“Yeah? Do I get a picture of you in it too?”

“Nope.” She hopped off the bed and held her hand out expectantly for him to take the jacket off. He sat up and grabbed her hand, kissing the back of it. “Sophie. Shirt off.”

“No.”

He just raised his eyebrows and she gave in with a sigh, tugging it over her head. He nodded, satisfied, and helped her shrug the jacket on. “You’re easy when you’re cock drunk.”

She gasped, shoving at his shoulder. “I do not get cock drunk -”

“You absolutely do!” He laughed, swiping his phone from the bedside table. “C’mon. Pose for me.”

She pretended to blow him a kiss, striking a bunch of poses. He grinned, holding up his phone and taking way too many shots. “There we go, angel. I’m gonna send these in to Victoria’s Secret for you.”

She rolled her eyes and flipped him off for the camera, holding the jacket closed. “Shut up.”

“No. C’mere, pick out which ones I can keep.” He reached over and tugged on her arm and she shrugged off the jacket, carefully setting it on the chair before climbing back into bed, purposely dragging herself across him. He groaned. “Baby.”

“Yes.”

“Can’t do that. I’m almost hard again.”

“Okay. You can fuck me again.” She smirked up at him and he took a deep breath, then handed his phone over. “Choose your photos.”

She flicked through them and deleted a few, then grinned at the one of her flipping him off. Sophie cropped it in a little so it was much less suggestive, her chest mainly covered, and cut it off where the jacket ended, then set it as his lock screen. “There. Now you’ll always remember this whenever you look at your phone.”

“Trust me, sweetheart, there was no chance of me forgetting.” He smirked, glancing at the screen then gave her a sincere smile. “C’mon. We need to shower.”

“No.” She threw her leg over his hips, catching him with her ankle tucked around his thigh and leaned in to kiss him, hard. He groaned against her lips, pulling her closer on top of him. “Sophie.”

“Rafe.” She mumbled, nipping at his lower lip. He nudged his nose against her cheek. “Baby.”

“Just kissing, c’mon.” She argued, even though she rolled her hips against him, felt him stiffening against her, and knew exactly what she was doing.

“It’s never just kissing with you.”

“It was the very first time.” She grinned.

“When you kissed me drunk at the party and then rejected me?” He raised his eyebrows, clutching at his chest in mock pain. “Broke my heart, Flint.”

“And look, now you have me nearly naked in bed in Rome. I think you’re doing just fine, Cameron.” She quipped and he laughed. “Damn straight.” He gripped her hips when she moved to get off him, holding her in place. “Where are you going?”

“Want you on top.” She protested, grinding down against him. His breath caught in his throat and he flipped her over with ease, hooking his fingers in her underwear and dragged them off her legs, pushing one knee to her chest as he did. He reached to grab a condom off of the nightstand and rolled it down himself with a little groan, watching Sophie bite her lip. “Tell me how I got so lucky?”

“You’re such a romantic.” She teased, reaching out for him again. He leaned down and carefully slid into her, squeezing his eyes shut when she moaned at the feeling. “Can’t help it with you.”

“Cheesy.” She accused, gasping when he thrust a little harder.

“Mean.” He quipped, leaning down to kiss her, hard, and she responded eagerly. As much as he tried to hold back, they only lasted a few minutes before they were both coming again, Sophie biting down on his shoulder to keep quiet.

Rafe flicked her chest with a grin as he pulled out of her, shaking his head. “Did you just bite me?”

“We have two more days, we really can’t get kicked out for a noise complaint.” She giggled, smiling up at him with flushed cheeks.

___

The rest of the day was heaven for Rafe - Sophie was touchier than ever, even in public, and absolutely doted on him like it was her job. They wandered around a few tourist sites and by two pm, they’d already split three gelatos upon Rafe’s insistence they had to try ‘just one more flavor.’ He FaceTimed with Colin and James earlier in the day and was grinning ear to ear afterward, claiming multiple times that it was the best birthday he’d ever had.

Around six, after Sophie reluctantly agreed to their fourth gelato of the day, she waited outside in the sun as he went and got their cup to split. When Rafe returned from the shop with gelato for both of them, she covered her phone with her hand. “Thank you. I have someone on the phone for you.”

He raised his eyebrows. “Julia and Allie already texted me earlier today.”

She just smiled and handed him her phone - her dad waved at him with a grin on FaceTime. “Rafe, buddy, happy birthday!”

Rafe’s grin was so instantaneous it nearly hurt. “Jeff! Hi, thank you! That’s so nice of you to call!”

“Of course, had to check in on you. How’s your day, been good so far?”

Rafe blushed and shot her a panicked look as Sophie shot him a glare off-camera. “Yes sir, it’s been great. Sophie and I have been exploring the city and stuff, getting to know the history.”

“That’s great, I’m glad. Have any big plans tonight?”

Sophie scooted over so she was on screen. “We do, but he doesn’t know about them yet.”

“Ahh, a surprise. What else have you done, the Colosseum? Vatican City? Your mom would enjoy that.” Jeff grinned as Sophie rolled her eyes. “Dad, I’m not taking him to the Catholic Church on his birthday -”

“I know, Sophie, I was kidding.” He shook his head and Rafe held back a smile. “You have two weeks before school starts, right Soph?”

“Yeah, just need to do a few TA things and get my studio set up. Why?”

“I was thinking, we’d love to have you home for a weekend if you have time before classes start. Rafe, you’re welcome to come over as well.”

Rafe brightened as Sophie nudged her knee against his, smiling. “I’d like that. If Sophie’s not too busy, I mean.”

“No, I think I can figure that out. I miss you guys.” She smiled. “So Rafe gets to stay in my room, right?”

Her dad froze up for a second. “I was thinking the guest room or his own room at his house, actually -”

Rafe’s eyes went wide and he pinched Sophie’s thigh, shaking his head quickly. “I can stay at my house! That’s perfectly fine. She’s kidding. We’re in separate dorms on this trip, so it shouldn’t be any different -”

“Oh my god, no, you’ll stay in the guest room.” Sophie rolled her eyes. “Okay, dad, we have to go.”

“Right.” Her dad eyed them skeptically, then smiled. “Well, happy birthday, Rafe, hope it’s a good one. I’m excited to see you both soon.”

“I appreciate it, sir, that means a lot. Thank you.” Rafe beamed, but he could feel his neck getting hot, hoping her dad wouldn’t pick up on his terrible lying.

“Alright. Be safe, you two.” Her dad hung up and Sophie’s cheeks burned a little, feeling he was implying a double meaning. She swatted his chest. “Can’t you control your blush for two seconds?”

“No ma’am.” He replied with a grin. “That was so nice of your dad. Did you ask him to do that?”

“No, he just texted me and asked when he could call. He likes you. Even if you’re a shitty liar.” She gave him a pointed look and he just laughed.

“He’s cool.” Rafe nodded, satisfied. “Man, that was so nice. I can’t believe he thought of me.”

She paused, eating a spoonful of her gelato. “Has your dad said anything today?”

“No, he won’t unless Rose reminded him. But that’s unlikely.” He shrugged. “Sarah and Wheezie texted me, that was nice.”

“Your dad’s not going to call on your birthday?” She frowned.

Rafe shook his head. “No. I’m usually up at school by now anyways, so he forgets. He remembered senior year of high school, but that was because I had a party at my house and asked him if we could string up lights by the pool.”

“Oh. I don’t remember that party.”

He gave her a sheepish smile. “Yeah, uh, I didn’t invite you and your friends on purpose. Was trying to keep it lowkey, y’know.”

She narrowed her eyes. “Wait, was that the one that Cassidy Anderson got so drunk at, she had to get her stomach pumped? And Kyle Green broke his ankle -”

“When he tripped into the pool, yeah, that was the one. Word got around that I was having a party, I’m kinda surprised you didn’t end up there anyways.”

She laughed. “Carter went and texted me not to come, he thought the cops were going to show.”

He wrinkled his nose at the memory. “They did. It was bad, Shoupe told my dad and everything, I was in trouble for a month after that.”

Sophie raised her eyebrows, skeptical. “I’m sure you being in trouble meant nothing.”

“No, he canceled my golf lessons. That was actually a big deal, he knew I liked them.” He frowned a little.

She bit her lip as she suddenly remembered - her dad came home and told her mom that the big tips from the Camerons were going away, that they’d have to cancel their flights to go visit her in Sophie's first semester of college because they needed the refund as a safety net. It was a big deal that they had even promised to come at all, usually her dad had to work weekends to fit in more lessons and he’d asked off just to come see her.

When Ward canceled the lessons, a few of Rafe’s buddies followed suit and canceled as well - she and Carter went around to every course in the area that week to put up flyers to get their dad more customers. She felt a momentary pang of guilt putting two and two together and shook her head, trying to redirect the conversation. “Right. Um, so you want to head back to the hotel, get ready for dinner? I made a reservation for us at 7.”

“Yeah. You alright?”

She gave him a slightly forced smile. “I’m alright. Let’s go, birthday boy.”

He narrowed his eyes a little, but didn’t push it.

Dinner that night was on the rooftop of a hotel overlooking Rome, and they both dressed nicer than they had the whole trip, with her in a cream colored silk slip dress to complement her tan and him in a pair of nice slacks and a sleek short-sleeved button down. When their waiter came out to greet them with a drink menu, he glanced at Sophie’s attire and her ring and raised his eyebrows. “You are the honeymooners, yes?”

She blushed, shaking her head. “No, sir, the birthday. Under Sophie Flint.”

“Oh! The white dress, I was confused.” Their waiter gave them an apologetic smile. “Here is your drink menu, I will be back.” He returned later with two glasses of complimentary champagne, as well as the bottle of wine they ordered, and apologized again.

When he left, Rafe lifted his glass with a cheeky grin. “To my blushing bride.”

She scowled and stopped just short of kicking him under the table. “Shut the fuck up. Happy birthday.” She clinked her glass against his, shaking her head as he cracked up, thinking it was hilarious. “You’re not allowed to buy me any more rings, this just causes trouble.”

“Good trouble.” He protested and took off his signet ring with his initials, sliding it onto her thumb. “C’mon, you hardly wear any other jewelry daily. I like buying you things.”

“I know you do.” She rolled her eyes and pushed the menu to him. “Here. It’s our last night so go crazy.”

He paused, scanning over the menu. “Are we splitting this?”

“No, it’s your birthday dinner. My treat.” She frowned when he flipped the menu to just the entrees without any meat or fish. “No worrying about money.”

“I’m not. The carbonara at the other table looked good.” He replied, wishing he’d looked at how much the wine was that she ordered and made a mental note to pay for all their meals in the airport.

“You don’t like carbonara.”

“Maybe I do here.”

“Rafe.” She reached over and flicked the menu back to the more expensive options. “Do not hold back. I’m serious. I got this reservation back in June and I have more money left in my budget for this trip than I thought I would by now. Let me do this for you.”

“You’re sure?”

“I’m sure. And if you really want the carbonara, I’m getting it, so you can have some.”

He laughed as she reached over and refilled his wine glass. “Trying to get me drunk so I’ll give in?”

“Yeah, will it work?” She grinned.

He just shook his head and took a sip with a smile. “You’re spoiling me today.”

“Yeah, you deserve it.”

They were both giggly and drunk by the time they made it back to their hotel, after missing their metro stop twice. When they finally showered and collapsed into bed - to actually sleep, that time - Rafe hugged her close and pressed his lips to the top of her head. “I love you, Sophie. Thank you. So much.”

“Love you too, baby.” She murmured. “My favorite.”

When Rafe’s watch buzzed at 1am the next morning, he stirred a little, going to turn it off, but paused when he saw he had a call from his dad. He carefully untangled himself from Sophie’s koala grip and slipped out of bed, tugging on some joggers and a shirt before heading out to the hotel lobby to answer the call. “Dad? Is something wrong?”

“Can’t I wish my son a happy birthday?” Ward asked.

Rafe relaxed a little bit, settling back against a couch. “Yeah, um, it’s just early. I figured something was wrong with Wheezie or Sarah.”

“Ohio’s got the same time as the Outer Banks, kid.”

“I’m on that trip with Sophie, remember, I told you about it in June? We’re in Rome. I’m going home soon.”

Ward’s tone turned slightly sour as he was reminded. “Right. Forgot. You went all the way across the world for this girl?”

Rafe dug his fingernails into his palm, keeping his tone even. “For my girlfriend, yes. I love her.”

Ward sighed. “I’m sure you think you do, Rafe.”

“I know I do.”

His dad paused before speaking again. “I just don’t understand. You had a perfectly good thing going with Brooklyn, she has a great family. She’s used to our lifestyle.”

Rafe was exasperated, as well as exhausted, and pinched the bridge of his nose. “She cheated on me, Dad. Do we have to talk about this now?”

“Must have done something to fuck it up.” Ward shot back, taking on a defensive tone.

Sophie had realized she was alone in bed by then and crept out of their room, following the muffled sound of his voice to find him in the lobby. She crossed her arms, frowning, and mouthed ‘come back to sleep.’

Rafe motioned her away and gave her a fake smile, shaking his head. She frowned, not convinced, and came up behind him on the couch, slipping her arms around his shoulders and pressed a kiss to the crown of his head.

“I didn’t do anything.” Rafe replied curtly, standing to follow her back to the room. He lowered the volume on his phone so Sophie couldn’t hear a single word.

“Right.” Ward was unconvinced. “I’m sure this girl is just with you to get money out of you, don’t let yourself be fooled. I didn’t work this hard for our family just to let you think you’re in love with someone that can’t provide.”

Rafe was too tired to argue and kept his face impassive, wanting to end the conversation sooner than later with Sophie there. “That’s not it.” She took his hand and led him back to their room, staying quiet but watching his expression carefully.

“I’m just looking out for you.” Ward insisted. “You didn’t - you didn’t knock her up. Did you?” He questioned and Rafe wrinkled his nose a tiny bit at his accusatory tone. “No, Dad, of course not.”

Sophie raised her eyebrows, surprised that Ward had called, and let them both back into the room. Rafe gave her a quick smile and shut himself in the bathroom, not wanting her to hear any more.

“Oh. Well. Just, be careful.”

“I am. Uh, thanks for calling, I guess.”

“Right. Happy birthday. 21, right?”

Rafe’s face twisted and he was surprised to feel a few tears running down his cheeks as he leaned back against the wall, head hung low. “Close. 22.”

Ward made a small ‘huh’ noise. “22, I knew that. Night, son.”

When Rafe hung up, he let out a choked laugh, pressing the heels of his hands hard against his eyes. Even if it was the first time in a while his dad had called on his birthday, he still couldn’t even remember his age.

Carefully, Sophie opened the door, peering in. “Baby? Are you alright?”

He turned to her with tears in his eyes, trying his best to force a smile, but she realized right away and pulled him into a hug, holding him tight. “Come back to bed, Rafe.”

He followed her out and crawled back into bed with her, burying his face against her chest as she combed through his hair. “I deserve better.” He mumbled brokenly.

She frowned. “Of course you do, baby. I’m sorry. What’d he say?”

“Doesn’t matter.” He muttered, and he was so tired that he let his guard down to cry, shoulders shaking a little as he did. Sophie practically clung to him, letting him bury his face in her neck as she stroked her back. “It’s okay, I’ve got you. You’re alright.” She whispered.

He nodded a little, nudging his leg over her waist to draw her closer. “Love you.”

“Love you too, Rafe, so goddamn much.”

“What time’s our flight tomorrow?” He mumbled against her skin.

“Not til six, we can sleep in if you want.” She pulled back just a little to kiss him, peppering kisses over his cheeks. “I love you. No matter what anyone says.”

He frowned and her heart broke just looking at how defeated he seemed. “You didn’t hear, did you?”

“No. It’s okay. You gotta sleep, baby.” Sophie pulled the blankets back over them, nudging him up so his head was properly set on the pillow, even though she knew he’d have his head on her chest by the time she woke up.

“Soph?” He whispered after a few seconds, sounding close to sleep again.

“Yeah?”

“Thank you.”

She squeezed his hand gently. “Of course. I’m here for you, no matter what.”

taglist: @whoeveniskendall @kkmaybank @karsinner @outerbanksbro @outerbankspreferences @randomficsandshit @jailcalledlife @tovvaa @moniamaybank @illbesafeforyou @dontjinx-it @freddymaybank @jjmaybankzz @g4bster @oopsiedoopsie23 @babygal-babygal @thecuthoney @babeyglo

[mxchellesworld]

𝟑 𝐨𝐟 𝐚 𝐊𝐢𝐧𝐝 - 𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝟏𝟐

𝐒𝐩𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐫 𝐑𝐞𝐢𝐝 𝐱 𝐂𝐚𝐭 𝐀𝐝𝐚𝐦𝐬 𝐱 𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

𝐒𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬; 𝐃𝐞𝐜𝐞𝐦𝐛𝐞𝐫 𝐢𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐦𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐡 𝐰𝐡𝐢𝐜𝐡 𝐛𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐬𝐰𝐞𝐫 𝐲𝐨𝐮'𝐝 𝐛𝐞𝐞𝐧 𝐰𝐚𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐟𝐨𝐫.

𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: smut, phone sex, mutual masturbation, dirty talk

𝐒𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐬 𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭

𝐏𝐫𝐞𝐯𝐢𝐨𝐮𝐬 𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 | 𝐍𝐞𝐱𝐭 𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫

***

The next few weeks went by in a breeze. It was now mid December and you were excited for the holiday season. You weren’t able to go with your family this year but Abbie had promised to make the time as festive as possible in your new home. Cat had scheduled time off to spend it with you and Spencer as the both of your jobs already gave you the days free. 

They started to take you out to fancier places. You’d all dress up and sip on fine wine in restaurants. However you also had time with both of them individually. Spencer loved to take you to places where he could show off his knowledge. Dates to the museum or aquariums were your favorite. He would always talk your ear off and you would happily hang on to each word, asking him to further explain a certain topic. 

Cat was more for artistic dates. She signed you guys up for painting classes. Each one of your masterpieces were now hanging up in your apartment, greeting you every time you got home. Or a ceramics class where she wasn’t too fond of how messy clay can get. One of your favorites was a wine tasting class. Spencer had to take you guys home after one too many glasses. 

Slowly the emotional and physical bruises were disappearing. Neither of you had mentioned going back to the club. You didn’t mind though, it was probably for the best you take a break from that scene. You knew they still went, obviously being owners they needed to keep up appearances. 

Just because you weren’t playing at the club didn’t mean you weren’t having fun at home. After your stunt of trying to be in control they spent their time showing you exactly who was in charge. Shocker: not you. 

But just like their personalities had shifted your sex life had as well. Each time was filled with more of those kisses which made the butterflies in your tummy go crazy. More of your fingers interlaced and sharing each others breathes as you came down from your highs. More silent whispers of those three little words that made you all feel warm inside. 

_

You had finally been able to have that long waited brunch with Penelope. She told you to go to her favorite cafe. It was bright pink with rainbows and unicorns littering every single corner. 

You walked in and she called your name from a booth in the corner. She was excitedly waving you over. You had noticed her outfit was quite different than the one when you met her. The black corset was replaced by a knee length dress, it was pink and had colorful little shapes all over. She also donned chunky necklaces and had fluffy pins in her hair. 

“Y/n I am so happy to see you again!” she said pulling you into a hug. Her embrace was extremely comforting. It felt like when Abbie hugged you, the same sisterly protectiveness they both radiated. 

“Me too Penelope! How have you been? How was visiting your brother?” you questioned her as you sat down. 

She explained her family situation and you silently listened to her. Your hand instinctively grabbed hers from across the table, trying to bring her a gentle form of comfort and understanding. 

A waitress came by and asked what you’d like to order. You decided to get a lemon tea and a strawberry chocolate crepe. Penelope on the other hand ordered a unicorn blast frappe with a slice of chocolate cake. 

You both ate and talked about any updates in your life. You had told her about how you were mainly going to be alone for the holidays so she had invited you to her house for the annual party she threw. 

“Most people from the club go. We’re all really close and it’s fun to see each other in a different light ya know. I’m sure everyone would love to meet you,” she said taking a sip of her equally colorful drink. 

“Sounds fun. I’ll think about it and let you know alright,” you said cutting into the crepe. Of course you wanted to go but you didn’t know if Cat and Spencer wanted to have you around their friends yet. You guys haven’t had the conversation about making everything official but it was obvious you guys were a step up from the past dynamic. 

Once you guys had finished up eating she insisted on paying the bill. After a few minutes of bickering you relented and let her pay, “Fine, I’ll let you get it this one time but don’t be surprised if muffins suddenly show up at your house,” you said pointing a finger at her. 

She gave you a hug goodbye and wished you a safe drive home. You did the same and promised to keep her updated about your stance on going to her party.

_

Arriving at your house, you saw you had a missed call from Spencer. You set your stuff down and threw yourself on your bed, having your phone on speaker as it rang. 

Three rings later and you heard his voice float through the air, “Hey hey,” he said stressing the ‘y’. 

You giggled as you answered, “Hey Spence, What’s got you in a good mood?”

“I am glad you asked Y/n/n. I just finished all my grading for my classes this term and suddenly have the afternoon free,” he said excitedly. 

You were aching to see the smile you knew was on his face so you hit the button to switch the call to facetime. Like you had predicted he there was a smile on his face spread from cheek to cheek. His phone was propped up on his desk and you could see his whole face and torso. He was wearing one of his suit and sweater combos, which you thought were adorable. 

“Very nice, any big plans for the night?” you asked holding the phone up high as you laid in bed. You noticed the top buttons on the flannel you had on were popped off, showing the red lacy bra you had on underneath. Spencer’s lack of response let you know what he was looking at. 

“See something you like Sir?” you said in a teasing voice.  

He cleared his throat, his eyes shifting back to look at your face, “Of course I do. Who were you trying to impress wearing that under your clothes? Do they already know you belong to someone else?”

You decided to play along and tease him. The inner brat in you was aching to be let out so you had to have some fun. You set your phone to be propped up by your pillows as you rested on your knees in front of it. 

“Yeah and to who is that exactly? I don’t see a collar around my neck Spencie,” you said further unbuttoning the shirt, letting it hang loosely around your frame. 

You saw him look to his side, probably making sure the door to his office was closed. “Is that what you need princess? Do you need me to get you a collar like a lost little puppy to show you and everyone else who that tight little cunt belongs to,” he gritted into the phone. 

You shivered at his words. You had seen other people in the club with a choker type necklace around their necks. Many were simple with little designs while others had hoops at the front. Some people even tugged their partners around on a leash. You didn’t think you were there yet but the thought of everyone knowing who you belonged to because of a simple piece of leather around your neck was enticing. 

This time your silence let him know he had gotten to you, “Keep striping,” he said smirking into the camera. 

You pulled off the flannel and felt the hairs on your skin prick up from the chill in your room. “Keep going princess. I wanna see all of you.” 

Hopping off the bed you put your fingers in the leggings you had on and tugged them down your legs. Spencer licked his lips at the sight of the lacy set in contrast to your skin. All your best aspects were on display. You crawled up towards the phone and saw Spencer shifting with his pants. You grabbed the phone again and went back to your previous position of laying down. 

“Touch yourself for me princess,” you heard Spencer say. 

You let your hand slide down between your legs grazing over the lace material, you could feel the slowly growing wet patch. A sigh left your lips at the sensation, your fingers teasing over your clothed slit. 

“I wish you were here Sir,” you said looking into the phone. You could make out the motions of Spencer pumping his cock but the visual was under the frame, “Can I watch you?” you tried to say in your most convincing voice. Knowing about his soft spot for you, you’d get your way easily. 

He scooted his chair back a little and angled his phone giving you a full view. You moaned at the sight of his long cock dripping with precum, the way he used his thumb to collect it over the tip just how he liked it. 

“Fuck princess, I wish you were here too. I’d bend you right over the table and fuck you hard enough for everyone in this damn building to hear,” he groaned. 

You let your fingers slip inside the fabric and gather some of your slick. You used it to rub quick circles on your clit before you inserted one of your fingers. You whined wishing it was one of his longer, fuller ones. 

Your eyes raked over the phone screen, taking in the way his head fell back as he pleasured himself. The way the long veins on his hands popped out drove you wild. 

You weren’t shy about hiding your moans. You let them float through the room and into the phone freely as you fingered yourself. Neither of you were saying much but the thought of each others presence was enough to have you guys panting. 

“I’m so close Sir,” you moaned, “I wish I had your big cock inside me.”

“That’s it baby, fuck yourself while you think of me. Just wait until I get my hands on that sweet body again, I’m gonna fuck you till you cry princess,” he said breathlessly. 

His words spurred you on and soon enough the knot in your belly was exploding. You took the fingers out from inside of you and quickly rubbed your clit. Your other hand had a hulk-like grip on your phone

“Cum with me Sir. Please,” you mewled out. 

“I’m right there with you princess.”

You both let out sighs of pleasure. His a bit more quiet due to being on campus and the walls could only do so much. You tried your hardest to keep your eyes open and gaze over everything on your phone. You tried to catch his facial expression down to the spurts of cum dripping down his hand. 

You stayed spread out on your bed as you watched Spencer clean himself up with a pack of tissues on his desk. He then tucked his now soft cock into his pants and picked up the phone looking at you with a smile. 

“Hey,” you whispered. 

“Hey pretty girl,” he said back. 

You thought back to Penelope’s invitation and decided to bring it up to him, “I was at lunch with Pen today and she brought up a party she holds for the holidays. Maybe it’s dumb but do you and Cat wanna go together? Like with me I mean,” you asked laying on your side. 

“Yeah I don’t see why not princess. We’ve been meaning to show you off to everyone at the lounge but we didn’t know if you were ready to go back,” he trailed off. 

“I understand. Thank you guys for being so patient,” you said. Your heart felt soft at how they wanted to introduce you to their friends. 

“Maybe by New Years or something we have a big event. You can even get me collar and all,” you said with a teasing giggle. 

He playfully groaned, “God you wanna kill me don’t you.” You shared a laugh and looked at your phones in silence taking in each other. The same giddy feeling you get when you’re around them flowed through you. 

_

The day of the party had came sooner than expected. Penelope was over the moon that you accepted her invitation. You showed up to Cat and Spencers apartment around 6pm to head over to Penelope’s house together. Your eyes raked over Cat’s frame as she opened the door. 

She was wearing a deep red dress that went down to her knees. It had a lace trim and black belt around her waist. Her hair was done in curls which fell to her shoulders. Looking back her face, the dark lipstick she always wears was painted across her now smirking lips. 

“Get a good look angel?” she said looking you up and down. 

You had on a forrest green dress that fell to your mid-thigh. Your hair was in looser curls and you did minimal makeup. 

“Always Mistress,” you said with a wink. 

She brought you into a hug and gave you a small squeeze. Looking into the hallway you saw Spencer make his way over to where you stood. He had on one of his dark suits. The only spec of color on him was the red and green tie around his neck and the mix matched Christmas socks peeking from under his slacks. 

Once she let you go. Spencer took his turn to wrap his arms around you. You inhaled the scent of his usual peppermint and Calvin Klein cologne. He rocked you back and forth then let go and looked you up and down. 

“Both of you look absolutely beautiful tonight,” he said with a small smile. 

“Spence come on you look as dashing as always,” you said dusting off his shoulder. 

“Well shall we get going?” Cat said shrugging on her coat.  

You and Spencer nodded then made your way down to the elevator. Cat’s fingers interlocked with yours as Spencer held his hand at the small of your back. 

The car ride there was mostly quiet. You watched as the lit up streets passed you by. Storefronts with reefs and gigantic bows on top of their logos as decoration. Soon enough the driver stopped and they led you to Penelope’s door. You could hear the music from outside and you felt excited for what the night held. 

Spencer rang the doorbell and after a minute Penelope whipped the door open. You could smell the booze and gingerbread radiating off of her. 

“Hello my little sugar cookies, I’m so glad you could make it.” she said ushering you all in. You gathered she was already too intoxicated to question how you all showed up together. Of course you spoke too soon and she turned around pointing at the three of you. 

“Wait how do you all know each other?” she questioned. 

You were about to speak up and mention that you became friends after your first time at the club but Cat cut you off. 

“Y/n is our girlfriend.”

𝐚/𝐧; 𝐢𝐭𝐬 𝐨𝐟𝐟𝐢𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐥 𝐲𝐚𝐥𝐥!!! 𝐰𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐠𝐞𝐭𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐜𝐥𝐨𝐬𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐞𝐧𝐝 𝐚𝐡𝐡, 𝐥𝐨𝐭𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐡𝐨𝐥𝐢𝐝𝐚𝐲 𝐟𝐮𝐧 𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐞.

[spencers-renaissance]

Vivaldi on Full Volume

Summary: Spencer's done enough pining, so he decides to write a letter for Aaron telling him exactly how he feels and gives it to him on the jet. He cannot be held responsible for what happens when they land.

Tags: Love Confessions, Fluff, Getting Together, Insecurity, My Typical CM Characterisation: Protective Aaron, Shy Spencer oops

Pairing: Hotch/Reid

Word Count: 5.2k

Read on Ao3

The Love Letter, Uninterrupted

Spencer’s hands are shaking as he gets up from his seat in the corner of the jet. They’re 40 minutes away from landing, deliberately planned well in advance: everyone’s well and truly settled, there isn’t long to wait for a private conversation and people haven’t woken up to prepare for landing yet. This is well thought out, he tells himself, trying to be convincing. There isn’t much that can go wrong.

Except there absolutely is. He’s run all the possible outcomes over and over in his head, at night, on the jet, spare moments in cases; he knows pretty much every possibility in and out. The worst case scenario, of course, is Aaron flips and hurts him or never talks to him again, but he knows logically that this is unlikely. No, the most likely situation is a polite rejection and a rift in their relationship, but it’s a risk he has to take. This limbo is too painful to exist in forever: he has to give himself a chance at happiness, and if that doesn’t happen he needs a chance to get over him. 

Aaron is, predictably, sitting on his own at the other end of the jet, getting a head start on his paperwork. He’d shot Spencer a questioning look when he’d opted to sit on his own instead of opposite or next to him, but everyone knows that Spencer sometimes needs a moment to himself and after he’d responded with a reassuring smile, Aaron had smiled back and looked down. 

“Reid,” he greets him as he looks up from the plethora of forms and files and reports littering the table in front of him, that questioning look returning and bleeding into his voice. “Is there anything I can do for you?” he asks after Spencer stands there frozen for a moment, shaking him out of his head and reminding him of his mission. 

“Yeah, sorry,” he says softly, chuckling a little. “Here. Can you do me a favour and… read this for me? All the way to the end? Leave your questions for the end, and we can talk once we land.” He hands him the pretty stationery wrapped in a tissue paper envelope. The seal is a deep navy that had reminded Spencer of Aaron the moment he saw it in the shop, and he used it even though he knew it would tear the tissue and was utterly pointless. His hands still shake a little as he passes it over, but he doesn’t blame himself. Anyone would be nervous. This isn’t just a Spencer thing.

Once Aaron has the letter in his hands he turns it, looking it over, before meeting Spencer’s anxious gaze with his own steady one, now filled with growing curiosity. “Of course,” he says, indulgently. It’s one of Spencer’s favourite things about him, his stoicism in the face of a surprise. He doesn’t react in a way that might further upset somebody when they share something with him, and it makes him an excellent leader. 

Spencer shoots him another nervous but meaningful smile, the kind he uses with his friends, with Henry, with people he cares about. People he’s been in love with for five years. Whatever. 

He turns away and doesn’t look back.

★

Aaron struggles to contain his curiosity long enough to wait until Spencer is settled back in his seat on the other side of the plane. This must be why he’d chosen to sit somewhere other than next to him on this flight which had admittedly confused him a little, Spencer usually liked the familiarity and comfort of sitting next to him. He’d suspected he needed space but now it seems as though he was psyching himself up to hand this letter to him. 

It’s not a resignation letter, Aaron is fairly certain of that, Spencer would never use such beautiful stationery and a seal in his favourite colour for something so straightforward and professional. He’d also given him one of those heart-warmingly open and trusting smiles before turning back, even if it was a little anxious. This is something personal. 

Finally giving into his curiosity, he carefully opens the handmade envelope and pulls out the letter written on high-quality paper in Spencer’s delicate script. 

Aaron,

I have debated sitting down and putting pen to paper to write this letter for a long time, much less handing it to you to read. This is perhaps the most forward thing I have ever done, and you will understand that it is also the bravest. I know I am crossing a line in writing this. I have never been one to break the rules, it's something we have in common, isn't it? We're both straight arrows. Perhaps I am hoping for too much. I am not the object of many's desire and maybe it is foolish to hope that someone as amazing as you could possibly be the exception, but if I don't get it out of my system I'm afraid this secret may bubble up and swallow me whole, its acidic aftertaste never quite leaving my mouth.

Immediately, Aaron’s heart starts beating out of his chest. Spencer rarely calls him Aaron -- the whole team operates on a largely last-name only basis -- but he’d be lying if those infrequent times when his first name leaves Spencer’s lips don’t make his heart flutter and insides warm. His face betrays him, he knows, but this might just be everything he’s been hoping to hear for the last four years and the team is asleep or preoccupied right now, thanks to Spencer’s clearly well-planned timing. He can afford to let his guard down a little.

His stomach clenches, though, when he sees Spencer’s insecurity bleeding into his writing, the ink revealing his painful self-doubt where his lips keep them tightly sealed away. He’s absolutely everything Aaron is craving, and if others can’t see that then it’s their own loss. He knows, though, that Spencer is too oblivious for his own good: the rest of the team don’t miss the looks he gets when they go out for drinks, but Spencer does. Spencer could get anyone he wants, even if he doesn’t realise it, and the honour of being the chosen person isn’t lost on him.

The truth of the matter is we live dangerous lives. This plane could crash, one of us could get shot, stabbed, blown up and not survive it next time. I need to take advantage of the fact that right now we are alive, and if there is any chance that I could live my life alongside yours then I must take it.

That makes Aaron let out a small, breathy laugh. He’d thought the same exact thing so many times, but Spencer was a lot braver than he was. Even if it didn’t have the potential for a sexual harrassment suit and the loss of his job, he’s not sure he’d have the bravery to tell Spencer just how in love with him he is. Not in a letter written with a fountain pen on pretty stationery, not to his face, not in front of others, not alone. Spencer has guts he’d lost a long time ago. A risky job had led to a tightly controlled personal life. He plays it safe. Spencer doesn’t.

Here is what I want:

I want to throw caution to the wind and live vicariously with you. Let's eat pancakes for dinner, drive down the interstate with the windows down and listen to Vivaldi on full volume, let's hold hands in the street in Virginia and say fuck it to anybody who has a problem with it. I want to get stuck in your head the way you're stuck in mine: when you're doing paperwork, I want to be in the back of your head. I want to excite you when you think of me naked, when you think of me spread out beneath you. Not a moment goes by where I don't think of you, Aaron. I wish I was on your mind in the same way.

Aaron’s face breaks out into a much wider smile. Oh, God, Spencer, he thinks, sending his eyes to the ceiling of the jet. You have no idea. Spencer doesn’t have to wish for this, to crave such a thing, it’s already happening. It feels like paperwork takes twice as long as it used to do before he fell in love with Spencer. It’s not even limited to his job: doing laundry, washing the dishes, cooking dinner, driving Jack to a soccer match, watching TV -- everything he does is consumed by thoughts of Spencer.

And Jesus Christ have mercy, the thought of Spencer spread out naked beneath him, what he looks like under those conservative button ups and cardigans, plays out behind his eyelids far too often. It’s made him feel like a pervert for years, fantasising about his much younger coworker and wondering what he likes in bed, how he could make him feel good. The idea that the same thoughts about him fill Spencer’s brain has him weak at the knees and hot under the collar. Of course he chose the jet to do this, he thinks amusedly. 

Let's find new TV shows and movies together! There's nothing I'd like more than to cuddle up against your chest after a hard case and watch something that we both enjoy, that gives us a sense of comfort and familiarity. On the weekends, let's get dressed up and visit fancy restaurants only to have a cheap crepe at the end of the night before rushing back home to get undressed again. I want to be yours, and I want you to prove that to the world.

Aaron’s heart is melting slowly, dripping down the inside of his chest, he’s sure of it. He’s walked into his apartment after a hard case feeling empty and defeated, wishing Spencer was there to give him a hug and take away the pain far too many times. It only ever made him feel worse, the belief that that would never happen, it never could happen, only now he’s being proved wrong. 

He already knows the first place he’ll take Spencer. Rossi had treated him to dinner there once after Haley passed away, and the ambience and seafood paella had wedged itself firmly into his mind. He’d fantasised many times about how Spencer’s eyes would look in the soft lighting, how he’d laugh in the relaxed setting, how he’d feel spoiled and loved when Aaron footed the bill, ignoring his protests. His heart feels full and bursting at the thought that soon these ideas might not be as far-fetched as he’d convinced himself for so long. He wishes he could see Spencer right now, but he knows he’s probably panicking quietly in the corner, and he was told to save his questions for the end. He’ll play on his terms, especially since it was Spencer who’d had the bravery to do this in the first place.

My biggest fear in writing this letter, though, may not be that you simply won't return my affections, but that you're still in love with Haley. I could never seek to replace her, but I know how deeply you loved her and how painful the wounds of your grief still are. I hope you know, Aaron, that if you do love me back, I'm not jealous of Haley. Not at all. I respect her and I respect your grief.

He can’t help the stab of pain in his gut at the mention of Haley. He’d loved her so deeply and he knew the team was acutely aware of that, Spencer probably more than anybody else if this letter was anything to go by. It strikes him then, just how kind Spencer is. He’s always known it on some level, of course, but the selfless compassion and love for the people around him is so overwhelming when he takes a moment to properly comprehend it. He could have glossed over his late wife in such a letter, but instead he chose to promise Aaron that he could share his heart with Haley. He knows Spencer will keep such a promise. 

I've tried for years to hide the way I feel, Aaron. I went on dates to try and get over you, I dodged you in the break room and bullpen to avoid conversing with you which only made my infatuation worse each time, I feigned plans to get out of family nights because seeing you in a casual setting is so cuttingly painful. I can't hide it anymore, though. I'd rather transfer out of the BAU than continue in this limbo of awkward pining. If you hate me, that's okay, I can deal with that. But there isn't much I don't know, and not knowing this? It's agonising.

Aaron’s stomach clenches again. He wishes they hadn’t been pining all these years so Spencer didn’t have to exist in the parallel of his own realm of wistful agony. The thought of him avoiding him in the break room with the empty ache of unrequited love filling his insides, believing he could never have him when Aaron had been doing the same thing is almost laughable: they were both so oblivious.

Seeing Spencer dressed in jeans and a t-shirt last year when Morgan had invited them all to one of his renovation projects had tortured him for weeks afterwards, and now he was being told that he’d done the same to him; Spencer had gone home after those gatherings and thought about him casual and relaxed, unbuttoned polo shirts and all. It’s almost unbearable. 

It’s reassuring, though, to know Spencer is as committed to this hypothetical as he is. Aaron would leave the BAU, too, if it came to it. If it meant he got to come home to Spencer and cuddle him on the sofa with history documentaries playing on the TV that Spencer was subconsciously memorising and would repeat the next time it was even slightly relevant in conversation. If it meant he could smile knowingly, and wrap an arm around his oblivious boyfriend’s waist, proving to the world that Spencer was his, just like he asked. 

The only way to end this letter is with hope. Any answer you give me I will respect, but I am holding out hope that you will say all this back to me, that you will write your own love letter or profess your own love. That you have similar fantasies and daydreams about me, that you've thought of all these things, too. Thank you for reading this all the way through, Aaron. All that's left to say are five simple words:

I'm in love with you.

Spencer.

Aaron reads the letter over once more before folding it carefully and placing it back in the envelope. He’s completely floored, to be honest. The last thing he expected after a fairly straight-forward case in Seattle was a love confession from the man he’d been in love with since before Haley even passed away, but he’s going to take it and run with it, consequences be damned. 

The plane starts to descend and the rest of the team begin rousing from their naps or putting their books down as chatter starts to rise. “Right,” Aaron says, grabbing everyone’s attention, though Spencer keeps himself carefully tucked away in the corner. “We should have the next few days off though we are on standby, okay? Everyone get some rest, make sure you come back refreshed and ready to tackle the next case. Don’t forget your reports though, have them emailed to me or on my desk by Monday.” He gives everyone a tight smile before turning away as conversations resumed. 

He knows Spencer is tormenting himself by analysing every cadence in his voice, trying to gauge his reaction and he longs to walk over to him and kiss his anxieties away, but he can’t. Spencer specifically asked him to wait until they landed, and he can’t reveal anything to the team so early, certainly not without discussing it first. Instead, he sits back in his seat, abandoning the paperwork in front of him in favour of fighting the fond, excited smile off his face and imagining his first kiss with Spencer, the anticipation making it so much more intense now that it’s actually real.

Time, as it always does, passes, however slowly. They eventually land and Aaron schools his face as the rest of the team pour out onto the tarmac. “Right everyone, I’ll see you in a few days but keep your phones on in case we get called up,” he calls once they’re all off the plane. As everyone starts to peel off to the garage or the office, he turns to Spencer, still keeping his face straight for the sake of others around them. “How about we go to my place and talk.”

“That sounds good,” Spencer says, small smile taking the edge off the anxiety on his face. 

★

The car ride back to Aaron’s apartment is quiet. “I don’t need to pick Jack up until the morning, so it’s just us tonight,” he explains, and Spencer is relieved to see his face soften significantly now they’re alone. He allows a dash of hope to flare in his chest before forcing himself to temper his expectations. You don’t know anything yet. He could be letting you down easy, this could be a pity thing. His fingers drum anxiously against his thigh as Aaron drives, eyes focused straight on the road, his face still unreadable. God, does he have to be so sexy when he drives? 

Just like the time on the plane, though, the time in the car eventually passes, the tension thick between them by the time Aaron pulls into his apartment complex. He smiles gently at Spencer as he takes the key out of the ignition. “Shall we head up?” he asks, and Spencer’s floored at what he sees in his face: he’s wearing the expression he only pulls when he looks at Jack or the team as a whole on a relaxed evening out. To see it directed at him exclusively is a kind of intensity he isn’t prepared for and it bowls him over for a second. 

“Yeah,” Spencer laughs breathily. “Sorry, yeah. Let’s go up.” 

The apartment door closing behind them sounds way too loud to Spencer and, sick of the tension, he decides to try and clear the air. “Look, Aaron, Hotch, can you just tell me--”

He’s cut off by Aaron’s lips pressing firmly against his own, a hand coming to rest on his waist while another grips his face gently. It takes him a second to catch up before he’s kissing back, overwhelmed by the feeling of Aaron’s hands on his body, the very hands he’s admired for years, the hands he’s fantasised about, the hands that make him feel things. He reaches up to place his own on Aaron’s chest, feeling the broadness there, the strength in the body against his making him weak at the knees. 

Aaron pulls away eventually. “God, you have no idea how long I’ve wanted to do that,” he says, voice as breathless as Spencer feels. 

“Me too,” he replies, chest heaving as he catches his breath. “Maybe… maybe we should do it again.” He smiles shyly at Aaron before leaning in again, this time gasping a little as Aaron pushes him back against the door for leverage, tracing his hand up and down Spencer’s sides, making him tremble in his grip.

“God, Spencer, you’re so damn breathtaking,” Aaron says in between fervent kisses. “Literally.” They both giggle into each others’ mouths at that, relief filling both of them up to the brim as the knowledge that finally, finally, their pining is over sets in. This could be it, they could build something real. 

“Aaron,” Spencer moans, trembling more as Aaron presses himself closer, right hand moving to grip the back of his neck gently, holding him firmly against his body. It overwhelms Spencer a bit, feeling completely surrounded by a man who was so unattainable for so long, by the person he’s been in love with for years. 

It was completely involuntary, but it makes Aaron pull away, resting his forehead against Spencer’s as they both breathe deeply. “We should talk,” he says softly, pressing a final chaste kiss to Spencer’s lips before pulling back completely and taking his hand, leading him to the sofa. 

“Could I have a blanket or something?” Spencer asks shyly, looking sheepish. “I’m a bit chilly.”

He sees realisation dawn on Aaron’s face along with a little bit of guilt. “Of course, Spencer,” he says. “Sorry this is so backwards. Do you want anything else? Something to eat or drink?”

“No, I’m fine,” Spencer says lightly. “Let’s talk and then we could order some dinner?” 

“Sounds perfect,” he smiles, reaching over into a cupboard and bringing out a thick, fluffy blanket. He drapes it over Spencer and makes sure he’s completely comfortable before sitting down opposite him on the sofa himself. “So. Your letter.”

Spencer ducks his head, a light flush tinting his cheeks. “Yeah, I guess I didn’t know how else to say it?” he says, a question colouring his voice. 

“No, I’m not criticising you,” Aaron rushes to clarify. “It’s possibly the most romantic, beautiful thing anyone’s ever done for me, and the truth is, Spencer, I’m in love with you, too.”

Spencer’s head darts up, wide, earnest eyes meeting Aaron’s serious gaze. “You are?” he asks, voice filled with the surprised sort of wonderment that always betrays him whenever any sort of love or affection is revealed to him.

“I am,” Hotch chuckles fondly. “Very much so. I’ve loved you since before Haley passed, to be honest. I’ve done all the things you wrote in your letter, too; I want all the same things you do.”

Spencer’s blush darkens a bit at that, remembering… certain parts… of his letter that he hopes Aaron includes in that statement. “All of it?” His voice is a little squeaky, almost cracking as he clears his throat at the awkwardness. 

“Yeah,” Aaron grins cheekily, loving that he can appreciate the blush on Spencer’s cheeks openly now. There’s no more room for hiding. “All of it.” 

Spencer clears his throat again. “So, is this what you want? Me? A relationship?” he asks, still a little uncertain, not quite secure in the fact that Aaron won’t back off and say this was an experiment, he’s not really committed in the same way Spencer is. 

“Wild horses couldn’t keep me away,” Aaron says earnestly. “I want you. I want everything that comes with you, I want the highs and lows of a relationship, I want commitment, I want fun, I want seriousness. Spencer, will you be my boyfriend?” 

Spencer’s brain short circuits for a second before he looks up with the widest smile, one usually reserved for Henry, the kind that reveals unadulterated, unconditional love. “Yes,” he whispers as he launches himself across the sofa and into Aaron’s arms, resting his head on his chest as he revels in the comfort of that exact moment. Finally, though, the extreme emotions of the evening catch up with him and he can’t quite fight them off anymore, maybe his brain is finally convinced that he doesn’t have to, that he’s safe here. Whatever the reason, he can’t help the tears that start to leak from his eyes, or the sobs that softly wrack his shoulders. 

“Spencer,” Aaron whispers back, voice dripping in concern. “Spencer, what’s wrong?” 

“It’s just… it happened,” he tries to explain through his snivelling. “What I hoped for… at the end of my letter. I wrote ‘I am holding out hope that you will say all this back to me, that you will write your own love letter or profess your own love. That you have similar fantasies and daydreams about me, that you've thought of all these things, too.’ And you did. You do.”

“Yeah,” Aaron says, struck with awe, too. “It’s pretty overwhelming for me, too.”

They lie like that for a while longer, finding comfort in one another’s arms, the weight of Spencer weighing Aaron down in a way that feels like security and Aaron’s arms wrapping around him in a way that gives him all the comfort and protection he craves.

Eventually, Spencer picks his head up and meets Aaron’s tired eyes. It had been a long case and an emotionally exhausting evening, and it was nearing midnight. “Shall I order some pizza?” he asks, playing with the tie Aaron was still wearing, slightly loosened but still sexy enough for Spencer to very much appreciate. 

“Please,” he says, leaning forward to press a kiss to Spencer’s lips. “I can’t believe I just get to do that now.”

Spencer hums in content. “Well, by all means, Mr Hotchner, do it again,” he says in a sultry tone.

Aaron groans. “You’d better not talk like that, Spencer, or we’ll never get our pizza.” 

“Sorry, sorry,” he chuckles. “You get us some drinks and get the telly set up. I’ll be right back.” 

Aaron closes the curtains, turns off the overhead light and turns on some lamps and lights some candles. Spencer raises an eyebrow at that and he puts his hands up defensively. “What? They’re cosy!” Spencer giggles at that, kissing him again. 

“Can we put the history channel on?” Spencer asks while Aaron turns the TV on and fiddles with the volume. 

“Wouldn’t expect anything less, sweetheart.” Spencer ducks his head and blushes, insides warming and tingling at the affection. He’s still not entirely sure this isn’t a dream. Aaron, unfortunately, doesn’t miss it. “Aw, are you blushing? Do you like that, you like it when I call you sweetheart?” he teases, smiling warmly at Spencer, clearly relishing in the deep red colour of his face. “Or is it just any pet name? You like it when I call you pretty names, baby?”

Spencer nearly outright moans at that but manages to stifle it, not that it makes much of a difference in Aaron’s delighted expression. “Stop, Aaron,” he whines in a manner that conveys he would very much not like Aaron to stop. 

“God, baby, you are too much to handle,” he groans, leaning across the sofa to pull Spencer away from his perch against the corner and into his chest. They lay quietly like that for a few minutes while the history channel plays a documentary about the Battle of Trafalger, breathing deep and slow as they appreciate this little slice of serenity while they wait for their dinner to arrive.

Once their pizza boxes are empty and they’ve finally had something to eat, Aaron turns to Spencer who’s meticulously wiping the pizza grease on his fingers away with a napkin, making him smile fondly. “Hey, Spence?” he asks, grabbing the attention of the younger man. “I wanted to talk to you about something you wrote in your letter.” 

Spencer looks a little bit like a rabbit caught in the headlights, hesitant as to what Aaron is about to say. What if he was mortally offended by something, or he didn’t like something I wrote? Was I too forward?

“First of all, I’ll always love Haley, but in a distant, wistful kind of way that I can’t quite explain. She’s been gone for a while now and I’ve moved on,” he explains, and Spencer’s flush returns. It’s one thing to write the letter, hell, it’s one thing to hand it to Aaron, but it’s another thing entirely to discuss the ins and outs of his heart in such graphic detail. “I fell in love with you very slowly, but I’d realised it around four months before Haley died. I’ll grant you that in the following year I didn’t really have much time or emotional capacity to dwell on it but it was always there in the back of my mind, and it’s only intensified over the last two years.”

“Really?” The flush is still firmly rooted to Spencer’s face, but his eyes are wide now, staring into Aaron’s with an earnest sort of intensity. “I had no idea.”

“Well I had no idea that you wanted everything I did, either,” Aaron chuckles. “Instead we’ve just been existing in a state of perpetual mutual pining and if you hadn’t had the bravery to do what you did, maybe we never would have known.”

“It was rather brave,” Spencer smiles, joking a bit, but they both know it’s the truth. “I’ve been in love with you since the Tobias Hankel situation. After you understood me and knew how to find me, how you saved my life. It spiralled from there and no effort to try and get over you has succeeded.”

“Mmm you mentioned,” Aaron hums. “I must say, I’m a bit jealous of these other dates you speak of.”

“Well you shouldn’t be,” Spencer says. “They didn’t hold a candle to you, and the few that made it past the first couple of dates knew that all too well.”

Aaron chuckles lightly at that before they settle into a comfortable silence, the TV still playing the background. “Do you want to stay here tonight?” he asks, voice low and a bit unsure. “No funny business, I just… don’t want to let you go yet.”

“Me neither,” Spencer says honestly. “Of course I’ll stay.” He can hear his voice still sounds a little squeaky, still vulnerable in this new situation. 

Aaron smiles back and turns the lights and TV off, blowing out the candles before offering a hand to Spencer as they make their way to his room. 

“Oh,” Spencer says, stopping in his tracks as soon as they step into Aaron’s bedroom. “I left my go bag in the car.”

“I’m sure we can find a solution to that,” Aaron smirks, pushing the bedroom door closed with his left hand and crowding him up against it with his right, diving for his neck. Spencer moans high in his throat, pressing forward further into Aaron’s hold. “You can wear one of my shirts. God, I’ve fantasised about you in my clothes for years, baby.” 

“So… so possessive,” Spencer teases through Aaron’s kisses.

“Yeah, you love it.”

“I do. I love you.”

That gets Aaron to pull away, looking deep into Spencer’s eyes, awe filling his gaze. “I love you, too. Fuck it feels so good to hear that, to finally say that.”

“I know.” Spencer’s blushing slightly, the forwardness of his remark embarrassing him slightly. 

“Come on,” Aaron says, pressing one final kiss to Spencer’s lips. “Let’s get ready for bed. I’ll find you a top and I know I have a spare toothbrush around here somewhere…”

Spencer smiles, sitting on the bed as he watches Aaron bustle around the room, finding the stuff he needs for the night. This could be it, he thinks. This could be my life now. Domesticity had never much appealed to Spencer, but sitting there now as Aaron chatters away about the visit to the shopping centre that has resulted in buying the top he tosses Spencer’s way, he knows he was right to change his mind. He was right to crave this, to crave pancakes for dinner and new TV shows and lazy mornings.

And when they’re finally cuddled up in bed, warm under the covers and safe in one another’s arms, he knows he was right to share that craving with Aaron. 

[delectablyalicee]

Nick Jonas’s New Assistant (Part 8)

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part7

You get a call one day, someone asking you to fill a personal assistant job. They give you little information as to who for, but when you found out, things get a little more interesting.

*RING RING RING* I groan at the loud sound penetrating into my ear drums. I toss and turn attempting to ignore it, but it is incessant. I finally, reluctantly, open my eyes and turn toward the sound, it's my cell phone ringing, but without looking at who is calling I turn it off. My head is pounding, and my mouth is dry, the last thing I want to do is answer the phone. I turn my head to look at Nick, somehow still sleeping peacefully beside me. He looks so calm and relaxed; his hair is disheveled but he still looks so fucking cute. The blanket is barely covering his naked body.

I remember what happened last night, and I wish I could be laying here so stoked about it, so excited that it happened, but I can't be. I fucking told myself I would stop at flirting, but I just couldn't help it. Almost every day for 6 months I have been with this man and every single day I fall more and more in love with him, how long did I think I was going to be able to pretend I didn't have these feelings? How long did I think I could put off these feelings? The problem is, all this doesn't change the fact that I don't know if I can do this with him. If I can make things ever go past being his assistant. I don't know. Everything is just too fucking much right now and my head is throbbing.

Plus, what is Nick going to say when he gets up? I know he will remember, he isn't one to ever black out, but still. Just the thought of having to have this talk is sending my anxiety through the roof and being hungover is definitely not helping. I don't want to regret what happened. I want to cherish it forever, think about it all the fucking time, but my brain won't let me not hate myself for it. I am going to have to figure this out and figure it out quick.

I need to pee, so I try to gently move off the bed. I don't want to wake Nick, but the second my feet hit the floor I feel a hand grab gently at my wrist.

"Please don't tell me you are running away." the words come out with sleepiness and sadness dripping from them.

I take a deep breath and turn toward him, I look at his face, tired from just waking up but still so handsome. I want to grab a hold of him and never let go. "I'm not running away." I stand up, his hand falling from my wrist. "I'm just going pee, I promise." I speak as I make my way toward the bathroom I hear him call out my name quietly, but I am already in the bathroom before he can say anything else. I shut the door behind me and lean against it for support. I bury my face into my hands. Fuck fuck fuck, I am so fucking fucked. Taking yet another deep breath I pull myself together. I can do this. I can handle this, I am an adult. I shake off some of my anxieties and actually go pee. As I'm washing my hands there is a knock on the door.

"Please don't avoid me, you know we have to talk about this Y/N." Again, his words sound sad and it almost rips me in two. I would never want to make such a wonderful human being so sad, yet here I am, doing it. It hurts so bad.

I open the door and nick is standing there, only his boxers on his body. I go to speak but before any words are able to leave my mouth there is a loud knock at the door, before either of us can react, its swinging open. My eyes widen, realizing I am still naked I retreat behind the bathroom door, closing it quickly. I then hear Joe's voice echo loudly through the room.

"Ah, good morning beautiful people. It's a wonderful day, isn't it?"

How does he sound so cheery after last night? There is no way he isn't hungover, it was /his/ birthday party after all.

I'm listening for Nick's response it takes him a second, but he finally answers. "Dude, can you quiet it down, some of us don't have freak bodies like yours and actually get hangovers. Seriously, how are you not dying? You were more drunk than I was last night."

I hear Joe laugh. "I don't know dude, I just woke up feeling..." he stops. "Wait, where is Y/N?"

Nick answers more quickly than I expected to, "the bathroom, we woke up about 2 seconds before you so rudely barged in."

Nick seems annoyed, but Joe is currently my life saver. I had no clue what I was going to say to Nick, and this stalling is working perfectly in my favor, but I can't hide in here forever, so I grab a towel, wrapping it around my body before opening the door with a smile.

"Hey Joe" is all I say. I try to sound as sweet as I can, I don't want him to get any sort of hint of the tension going on right now.

"Ah, beautiful, sweet, wonderful Y/N!" He grins. Breakfast is being served downstairs, so you two better get to it before it gets cold. He turns to leave, shoots me a wink, and is gone.

Nick looks at me, I look back at him but stay quiet. He sighs before finally speaking. "There are spare clothes in here, hold on." He walks over to a closet, grabbing a t-shirt and what looks to be basketball shorts. He hands them to me. "They might be a little big."

"It's okay, thank you." I say as I take them from him. He looks away from me now, putting his own clothes back on, as he is doing that I slide on the clothes he gave me, they are big, but at least they're comfortable, better than having to put back on that dress. I finish before he does, so I start to make my way toward the door.

"We can't avoid this forever." This time his words sounds more angry.

I turn and look at him, but he isn't even facing me. "I know." Is all I say before I'm out the door.

The smell of food hits me as soon as I leave the room, I pull in a big breath of what smells like pancakes, or waffles... or maybe even crepes? Whatever it is, it's calling my name. I head down the stairs and am greeted by probably 20 or so people, they all look like they had a lot of fun last night and are shoveling food into their faces. Joe comes over to me, handing me a glass of water, I take it, practically chugging half of it right away. "help yourself to whatever you want" Joe says. I grin and thank him, taking a seat at the large dining table and grabbing a plate of food. I grab a strawberry from my plate and as I'm taking a bite I see Nick walk into the room. He looks at me but looks away quickly. I frown. There is no avoiding this, despite how much I wish we could.

It's time to go. Nick had gone up to the room and grabbed our things as I called for a ride. I breathed a heavy sigh of relief when it wasn't George who answered, I knew he would know something was up, and despite how much I love him, that is not what I needed right now.

"Ready?" I turned to Nick once he got back downstairs. He just nodded and started to walk toward the door. I wanted to grab him. To stop him from walking away from me, to kiss him until my lips were numb, but instead I let him walk away. I trailed slowly behind, sliding beside him in the back of the car.

It was silent the whole ride. The only noise was the radio, which thankfully the driver had turned up to cut the silence. Once we got to Nicks house he was out of the car and inside before I even had a chance to collect my things. I could've had the driver take me right to my apartment, but I owed Nick more than that. So, I got out and went inside. I saw him making his way up the stairs.

"Nick." I said loud enough for him to hear me. He stopped, and I could see him hesitate, like he was deciding if he should ignore me or not. "Like you said, we can't avoid this." This made him turn around.

"We can't, but I also don't know if I can listen to you telling me how much you regret it and how big of a mistake it was, while I would have to sit there thinking about how amazing getting to be with you like that was. How just thinking about you, there, naked in front of me doesn't just fill me with lust, but pure joy." His words come out in a mix of anger and frustration, sadness trailing behind them.

His words are making me want to scream at him that I love him, that I want to be with him for the rest of my life, that I want us to run away and never look back, but I can't. "I don't regret it." I speak sternly, I want him to believe me because it's true. I take a deep breath before continuing. "I don't regret it, but it wasn't smart. I love this, all of this, I love being your assistant, I love my job, I enjoy every second we spend together and doing whatever this is, is only going to lead to bad things for both of us. Right now, as things are, I get to see you every day while doing my dream job. We move forward with this and it goes south, I lose my dream job and my best friend, and I don't think I can handle that."

He just stares at me, he is silent for what feels like forever, but then he straightens up and nods his head. "Okay, fine."

What? What did he say? Okay fine? What is that supposed to mean? I look at him, confused. "Okay, fine?" I repeat back.

"Fine." He says. "Fine, we'll keep it how it was," he pauses, "but, if I make you crack, If I make you realize that you want more from me than what you're saying you want, have to promise me you will give it a try. Scared or not, if I can crack you, we have to try."

I take a second to process what he just said to me. I guess I don't have much of a choice at this point, do I? I continue to hide my true feelings and get to keep my dream job and my best friend. "Okay, deal." I say.

"Great. The game begins." He grins and turns away from me, disappearing up the stairs.  

[eldritchsurveys]

768.

Why did you last feel like crying? >> When I checked my bank account because I was trying to decide whether to get HBO Max or not, and I discovered that my stimulus check is coming on Wednesday. I’m just really relieved, lmao. Had just about resorted to convincing myself that I wasn’t going to get one at all. But now I can get some stuff I need but can’t normally afford!

How long ago and why did you last feel infuriated? >> I don’t remember. It probably had to do with people making noise.

Do emotions control you or do you control your emotions? >> Er. Well, here’s the thing -- on a good day, when I’m not having Symptoms Of Disorders, my emotions can be pretty manageable, or at least my management of them can feel pretty competent and compassionate. On the other days, my emotions can be a fucking game of Minesweeper where all the squares have mines in them. Except one. One square has 100 mines in it. The probability of stepping on that square is like 80%. So.

Do you keep your friends secrets/private information to yourself? >> Well, yes, if that sort of thing was shared with me.

What negative quality do your friends bring up the most? >> I... don’t think I’d like to be friends with people who have a habit of bringing up “negative” things about me.

What quality do you think you have that others don't think you do? >> I don’t know, I haven’t taken a poll or anything.

Do you often "jump" to conclusions? >> I mean, maybe. I don’t know how often I do it but it’s probably the average amount.

Do you find being alone with strangers scary, interesting or indifferent? >> That definitely depends on the context of the situation.

Do you think you know a lot about the world? >> No, because I don’t.

What about the world do you wish you never found out? >> ---

Do you know first aid? >> Not really, mostly because I’ve rarely had an opportunity to practice it.

Does the sight of blood make you feel sick? >> Not as a rule.

Does your first name have an L in it? >> No.

Middle name have a C in it? >> No.

Last name have a R in it? >> No.

Do your initials spell a legitimate word? If so, what? >> No, they don’t. But Sparrow’s spells “SAD” and that’s pretty funny.

The word above, does it have any connection to you at all? >> I mean, she is on antidepressants.

Do you prefer classic rock or nope alternative? >> Nope alternative???? I don’t know if that’s a typo or what but that’s hilarious to me for some reason. Anyway, I listen to both classic rock and alternative.

Do you like Kings of Leon? >> Sure. They’re, like... motel-grunge/motel-rock adjacent. (I can’t be the only person who’s made up that term, for certain kinds of bands. Like Queens of the Stone Age and shit. Sometimes Kings of Leon gives the same vibe, but... cleaner, I guess.)

How about The Script? >> Never heard of them.

Does crying make you feel better? >> Sometimes, but first I have to go through the hell of letting myself cry in the first place.

Do you know a girl called Becca? >> No.

How about a guy called Gregory? >> No. I almost said yes and then I realised I was thinking of Greg Hirsch from Succession. smh

Does someones background effect whether you'll be friends with them or not? >> Their... background? What kind of background are we talking about here?

How about their religious background? >> I mean, I don’t think I could be friends with a fundamentalist evangelical Christian. But most non-fundie versions of religions are okay with me.

If someone admitted cheating in a past relationship of theirs, would you trust them? >> ---

Do you drink tea and/or coffee every day? >> Nope. It’s almost warm weather time, so I won’t be drinking much tea at all until fall, unless it’s iced.

Did you ever want to be a cook as a kid? >> No.

How about a fashion designer? >> Yeah, I used to draw outfits and shit. I still think fashion is a fascinating industry but I want no part of it myself.

Do you wish that magic was real? >> I mean, no, not really. Also, like. I have Inworld. So.

What food would you love to wipe off the face of the earth? >> ---

Can you use a bottle opener? >> Sure.

Do you own a cheese grater? >> Yeah.

What time will it be in 38 minutes time? >> 11.06p EST.

What day/date will it be in 11 days time? >> The 20th of May.

Have you ever owned a pet fish? >> Nope.

Do you prefer fire or ice? >> I have no general preference. They’re both valuable.

Do you rap along with rap songs? >> If I know the lyrics, yeah...

When happy, do you become more talkative? >> Not necessarily. Sometimes I’m happiest in silence.

Bowling or sailing? Why? >> ---

What colour is your kettle? >> Black.

How about your microwave? >> White.

Do you prefer sitting in the front or back of a car? >> It doesn’t matter.

How about in a train? On the bus? >> I have a specific seat I like on the bus. Train, doesn’t matter. (On the subway, I liked sitting in the smallest seats so there’d be less chance of someone sitting next to me. Some of the newer trains have that one-seater that flips up, by the door? Love that seat.

Do you care about politics? >> Fuck no.

Obama or Bush? >> Well, that’s this survey dated.

Blair or Brown? >> ---

When did you last cook something from scratch? >> I don’t remember.

What things make you jealous? >> ---

Are you offended easily by non politically correct language? >> I’m not easily offended, period. Most things I recognise aren’t meant to be taken personally by me, specifically. But obviously I’m leery of the usage of incendiary language -- I’m not going to hang out with someone who throws around racial slurs or mocks people for having feelings about words meant to hurt them, like, duh.

Do you think the censors/fcc go a bit too far or are just right? >> I have no opinion about this, especially not a generalised one.

Do you feel hungry, thirsty, sleepy or none of the above? >> I’m getting tired because it’s around my bedtime.

What's your I.Q? >> ---

What's your Mum's Mum called? How about your Dad's Dad? >> ---

Do you prefer crepes, pancakes or waffles? >> Waffles.

Do you have ice-cream in your fridge right now? >> I think Sparrow still has some in there. Oh, and I still have a few mochi ice cream balls.

How about chicken nuggets? >> No, just fried chicken.

Do you eat fish often? >> Not as often as I’d like.

Have you ever taken a martial art? Which one{s}? >> No.

Do you know anyone who is scared of you? >> I don’t know if anyone’s afraid of me. If someone is, I bet they’re not going to go around telling me about it.

What person who has died would you bring back and why? >> ---

Do you like watermelon? >> Eh. I don’t get the hype.

Can you remember the month of your first kiss? >> ---

Do you make friends easily? >> No.

What makes you different from everyone else? >> Nothing, dude. I mean, I obviously have differences from people I know, or people I might encounter, but not from literally every human on earth.

I give you a piece of paper. What do you draw/write on it? >> ...

What pictures or photos are up in your lounge? >> My what.

Do you like purple and white patterned things? >> Not especially.

Do you know anyone called Pipa? >> No.

I say purple, you think... >> Sparrow, because I think she’d paint the whole world purple if given half a chance.

What do you think is the most interesting thing about you? >> Just, you know. My existence.

Do you like being complimented or does it make you uncomfortable? >> It can make me uncomfortable because of brain shit, but I also appreciate it and will try to express appreciation instead of discomfort.

Does the description of your starsign correspond with your personality? >> No, because the language of astrology as used to describe a person is more complex than just wherever the Sun was when you were born.

Do you have a photo album? >> No.

What artists paintings do you find the most beautiful? >> *shrug*

What about the most disturbing? >> *shrug*

Have you ever gone to a camp or summer school? >> No. I did summer theater once and I’ve gone to day camps.

What was your favourite cartoon as a child? >> Johnny Bravo is the only cartoon I remember watching, tbh. I didn’t get to see a lot of television unless it was the boring ass shit (to a child, anyway) my dad watched.

What was your biggest fear as a child? >> Thunderstorms. Until I hit thirteen and then suddenly I just... wasn’t afraid of them anymore. Don’t ask me how it happened, I really don’t know. (It might have been more gradual than that, of course. Memory is unreliable, especially from that far back.)

Would you rather be able to fly or breathe underwater? >> Breathe underwater. So, you know, I could actually not almost drown for once.

What about invisibility or mindreading? >> Invisibility. I want nothing to do with other people’s minds.

Do you like what you see in the mirror? >> No, which is why I don’t look in the mirror unless it’s necessary.

Which stereotype do you dislike the most? >> All of them??? Stereotypes in general?

Can you remember all your past teachers names? >> I can remember more than I’d expect to remember, but definitely not all of them.

Do you like talent shows? Which ones? >> No.

Have you ever failed an important exam? In what? >> Yeah, I failed the English midterm and final in 11th grade -- well, I say “failed” but it’s more like “I got a zero because I literally turned in a blank sheet of paper”. I... was definitely struggling.

Do you find people taller than you intimidating? >> No.

Do you think you are better than people of a different country/background? >> Fuck no???

What's your favourite thing about your country? >> Dude.

What's your least favourite thing about your country? >> Sigh.

Who is your favourite bzoinker? >> I don’t have a favourite, I just use bzoink to find surveys.

What websites do you have bookmarked? >> I have a lot of websites bookmarked.

Do you use bows and ribbons to decorate your gifts? >> No. Well, I’ll stick a bow on a Christmas gift because why not, but outside of Christmas I don’t even wrap gifts. I might put it in a bag but that’s it.

Do you listen to the same type of music as your parents? What type is that? >> I grew up listening to soul and R&B and gospel, so yes, that’s all still part of me.

What TV show scared you as a kid? >> None.

Family Guy, The Simpsons or South Park? Why? >> Hmm. Well, I don’t really know anything about The Simpsons, but I’d probably like it better than Family Guy, and South Park is so hit-or-miss (with a lot of misses) for me that I can’t really deal with it anymore.

[avengerscompound]

Mixology - Weihnachten

Mixology - A Captain America Fanfic

Series Masterlist Previous //

Buy me a ☕ Character Pairing:  Steve Rogers x Reader

Word Count:  3010

Series Warnings:  Angst, Character death, Breaking up and making up, past trauma, pregnancy, talk of abortion, smut (vaginal sex, fingering, other things)

Synopsis:   Steve Rogers comes into your bar and after a night of flirting you take him home.  When he leaves the next day you never expect to see him again.

A/N:  This fic was written pre-Infinity War.  Here’s where it deviates from canon.

Weihnachten

You’d never really done Christmas before.  Since you’d escaped your parents celebrating a holiday that just made you realize how alone you were, seemed like an unusual kind of punishment.  Often you’d sign up to be the one to work or you’d find some work elsewhere if your regular job wasn’t open on Christmas day.  Extra pay and other miserable people around you was just as good a way to celebrate the holiday as any.  

After Tony had given you the payout for the injuries you’d received at Avengers Tower, you just drank through it.  It meant the day or two following the holiday was spent hugging the toilet.  Still, if you didn’t remember the actual day, you counted it as a win.

Now you and Steve were on the run together and Christmas had come around and he was really into it.  You rented an apartment in the middle of the Altstadt in Hannover, Germany.  The Christmas Markets were being held just outside your door and Steve was in some kind of heaven.  

Hannover was small enough that no one there that had their eye open for Captain America, but big enough that their Christmas markets were impressive and covered blocks and blocks of the city.  Steve was still going full beard in an attempt at a disguise.  He really looked nothing like Captain America anymore.  His disguise, in general, made him look like a hipster.  Full beard, thick-rimmed, completely aesthetic glasses, and plaid.  It wasn’t him, but he wore it well.

The two of you would steal out into the markets in the afternoon when the crowds were heavy enough to swallow you.  You’d buy hot glühwein and feuerzangenbowle to drink and salmon smoked over grates, or crepes with Nutella, or bread trenchers full of hot, spiced meats to eat, and then bundle back into your apartment and sit at the window watching the crowds and listening to the music waft up from downstairs.  

Steve was so enamored with the experience and just being himself with you, that he hadn’t even noticed that when you went and bought the drinks that you weren’t buying yourself the warmed alcoholic drinks he was drinking but heisse schokolade or kinderpunsch.  You’d also successfully been hiding the morning sickness.  So far it hadn’t been too hard to do.  You tended to get sick in the shower.  Something about the smell of the soap would set you off.  You’d just get out, throw up and then get back in and let the water settle your stomach again.  While the nausea didn’t really go away all day, you could live with it.  So you just made sure you didn’t complain.  

On Christmas Eve it snowed.   It wasn’t common for the region, but not unheard of.  The snow was that light powder that sits in piles of individual flakes that at first sight looks like fluff but when you take a closer look you can see each perfectly formed unique crystal.  

The markets around Altstadt had ended the day before but there were still some up near the train station. Steve avoided the area if he could because it was usually where the tourists loitered and the chance of him being recognized seemed higher.  So you stocked up on your groceries, made hot buttered rum for Steve and you sat up late just curled up under a blanket together watching ‘It’s a Wonderful Life’ followed by ‘A Christmas Carol’.

When the last movie ends he kisses you on the side of the neck, his beard tickling your skin.  “Germany was a good idea.  I was worried at first, but it couldn’t have been more perfect.”

“No one does Christmas like the Germans.”  You agree, turning your face to him.

He runs his thumb along your jaw and gently teases your bottom lip. Your lips part and you take a deep breath that shudders through you.  

“I hate this running.  I hate that I’ve had to make my friends scatter.  That none of them are safe because of my choices.  I hate that Bucky chose to leave me again.  I don’t know what I would do if you kept rejecting me.”  He says.  

“I know.”  

He pushes his thumb into your mouth and you suck on it.  “If I have to be a nomad I’m glad it’s with you.”  He breathes.

His hand moves to your hair and he leans into you slowly, his lips parting.  Your breath hitches and your tongue darts out just before his lips touch yours, licking over the corner of his mouth.  He tastes of rum and spice and he’s running hot.  His lips feel like hot coals against yours.  His tongue pushes into your mouth and you dance yours against his.

Steve slips his hands under your body and lifts you, bridal style.  You wrap your arms around his neck and he carries you to the bedroom, only breaking your kiss when he places you on the bed.

You sit up and hook your fingers into the waistband of his pajama pants and pull him towards you.  He scrambles to remove his shirt as you push his pants down.  He is already hard.  His cock springs up and rests against his belly.  You run your tongue along his length and tease at the head before rolling onto your back and taking him into your mouth.  He bends over you and his hand slips into your pajama pants, teasing your pussy as he fucks your mouth.  

The position you’re in opens your throat up for him, so you’re able to take him deeper than you normally can, but it’s difficult to maintain.  Your breath is hard to catch and to allow yourself time to breathe you release him and begin to lap from his balls and between his legs.  

He groans loudly and his breathing shallows.  You start to pump his cock with your fist and become more bold with your tongue.  Each swipe gets closer and closer to his anus.   The noises he begins to make are so base level, animalistic it makes your body tremble.  Steve rarely loses control like this.  He won’t allow it.  Yet here you are making him come apart.  You circle around his anus with the point of your tongue and arch up, so your chest is pushed against his cock.  After unbuttoning your shirt you take his cock and press it against your chest and push your tits together around it.  You then push your tongue into his asshole.  

He moans your name and grips your thighs with his large hands.  You continue to lick at him and move against his cock.  Your chest becomes sticky as precome leaks onto your skin.

“Fuck.  Please stop.”  Steve pants.  

You back off letting your head fall back and his cock spring away from you.  “Are you sure?  I don’t mind if you come on me.”  

“I know.  I know.”  He pants.  “I want to… I want us to make love.”

You scoot around into the middle of the bed, shedding your pajamas as you go.  He moves between your legs and runs his hands up your knee high bed socks.  “I like when you leave your socks on.”  

“Keeps my feet warm.”  You say.  

He tickles you and you clamp your legs around him pulling him down against you as you squirm and writhe below him.  His fingers move down along your side and between your legs.  He teases your pussy.  Stroking his fingers over your pubic mound.  

It feels like an eternity that he does that for.  He starts to kiss you again, his other hand fisting in your hair, but the anticipation of what those fingers are going to do to you becomes torture.  You whimper and squirm under him, pushing against his fingers so they slip between your folds.  

“Did you want something, sweetheart?”  He asks.  

“Steve…”  You whine.

“Oh, darlin’.  Am I teasing you?”  He says.  His finger pushes down on your clit and you’re so overwound and sensitive that is sends a sharp jolt through your body and you groan, bucking against him.  

He laughs and starts to move down your body, placing little kisses along your stomach as he goes.  “Well, this isn’t going to take long.”  

He spreads your folds and his tongue flicks at your clit.  It makes you squirm, pressure building in your core.  His fingers tease at the entrance to your cunt.  

“Steve.”  You say his name like you’re scolding him for misbehaving in class.  He laughs again and two of his fingers enter you.  He curls them inside you,  pushing against your g-spot and then dragging them over it.  You cry out and buck under him.  He focuses his mouth on your clit, tonguing it and sucking on it.

He is right.  It doesn’t take long.  You come quickly and hard.  Your whole body spasms and lights pop behind your eyes as you cry out a string of curse words.

Steve crawls up your body positioning himself between your legs.  “That’s an impressive mouth you’ve got on you, sweetheart.”  He says.  “I’m not sure I’ve ever heard such a colorful array of language and I was in the army.”

“I’ve got plenty more where that came from.”  You say.

You feel his cock press against your cunt and he looks deep into your eyes.  “I love you.”  He whispers.

“I love you too.  I’ve always loved you, Steven Grant Rogers.  From the day we met.  I tried really hard not to.  I wanted to hate you for a while.  I wanted to pretend you didn’t exist.  But in the end, it was always you.  It will always be you.”

He dives on you.  As you kiss, a kiss that is both lust and love, and passion and tenderness, he enters you.  You gasp.  One day you might become used to his size, today is not that day.  He doesn’t give you time to adjust though, he just starts to thrust.  

You come apart.

You cling to him, your hands clutching at his muscular back, your legs wrapped around his tiny waist.  He cradles your head with his arm and stares into your eyes.  A kind of electricity passes between you and you feel like if you let go of him you’ll just freefall.

You come for the second time tonight, clenching hard around him.  His body takes its cue from yours and he jerks suddenly spilling into you.  His thrusting slows as his cock pulses inside you and when it stills he slips out of you and rolls onto his back panting.  You move to the crook of his arm, curling your body against his and pull the comforter over the both of you.

He kisses you again, but neither of you says anything else tonight.  You fall asleep happy in the knowledge that you are together and in love.

You wake the next morning to Steve’s hands roaming your body and his lips pressed against the back of your neck.  You murmur a good morning and he pulls you against him, his cock pressing against your ass.  You hum and allow him to slip his hand between your legs.  Just as you start to feel that pleasant tingling sensation start to grow in your cunt a wave of nausea washes over you and you jerk away from him and dash to the bathroom.  You only barely make it in time to drop to your knees and heave into the toilet.

Steve comes up behind you, pulling your hair away from your face and rubbing your back.  When you are finally sure your stomach has settled, you get to your feet and flush.  Your body feels clammy and sweat clings to your skin.  Steve holds you against his chest and you’re not sure if you hate it and just want to get into the shower or if you love it.

“Do you think it was something you ate?”  He asks.  You shake your head and pull away from him and go and brush your teeth.

“Are you coming down with something?”  He asks.

“You could say that.”  You answer heading to the shower and turning on the water.

“Do you think it’s the flu?  We’re supposed to move on from here in a couple of the days, but if you’re going to be too unwell we should make arrangements to go somewhere nearby.”

You step under the water and let it wash over you for a little while.  Steve climbs in behind you and starts to wash your body.  Lathering up a washcloth and stroking it over your skin.

“It’s okay.  It’s not the flu.”  You answer stepping out from under the water.

Steve picks up the shampoo and squeezes it on the palm of his hand and then massages it into your scalp.  It makes your skin prickle and you hum as his fingertips work through your hair.  “How can you be so sure?”

“I know what it is, is all.”  You answer, stepping back under the water and rinsing your hair off.  When you step out Steve is waiting for you with conditioner.  He uses the palms of his hands to coat your hair, starting from the roots and making his way to the tips.

“Is it serious?  Should I be worried.”  He asks.

“It’s pretty serious.  Yeah.”  You answer.  You turn to face him and he looks like he’s in actual physical pain.  You touch his face, running your fingers over his brow to smooth out the creases.  “I’m pregnant.”

He shakes his head like he’s trying to clear it.  “Wait, what?”

“Yep.”  Is all you say.  You step back under the water and rinse the conditioner from your hair.

When you step out, Steve looks even more worried than before.  “What are we gonna do?”  He asks.

“Yeah.  We probably should have thought through the whole ‘us working in the wrong order’ thing a bit better.”  You say getting out of the shower.

You grab a towel and wrap it around you.  Steve switches off the water and follows you.

“Are you mad?”  He asks.

You turn to him.  “No.  I’m scared.  Really fucking scared.  Steve, my parents used to beat me.  I know you know that, but I’ve never said it out loud.  They used to beat me to the point I was in hospital.  We’re on the run, we’ve only barely gotten back together.  I’m scared.”

He wraps his arms around you pulling you against his chest.  You kind of feel like you might cry, but also that it’s not you.  Someone else wants to cry and she’s floating below you being hugged by Steve Rogers.

“I don’t know what to do,”  Steve says.

You bark a laugh.  “Are you mad?”

“No.  I’m scared too.  Not about us.  Or even being a parent really.  Just - how do we do this on the run?”  He says.  “We’re not really very smart about us, are we?”

You start laughing, really laughing and he joins in.  It relaxes you and he kisses you on the head.

You look up at him and frown.  “Maybe I should get an abortion.”  You say.

“Is that what you want to do?”  He asks.

You feel like a deer in headlights.  Like if you say what you really want, that you do want to keep this baby.  Even though that seems like a ridiculous risk to his safety.  That it will make him feel pressured to agree to that.  But if you say you want an abortion he’ll agree to keep you happy and you’ll end up doing something you both regret.

“I - I …”  You stutter.  “What do you want?”

“I want us to not be on the run so we can have this baby and a home.”  He answers.

You go and flop on the bed, staring at the ceiling.  “That’s not a very helpful answer, Steve.”

“I have something for you.  Hang on.”  He says suddenly.  You sit up and watch as he marches, naked and wrapped in a towel from the room.

He returns with a small, beautifully wrapped gift.  The paper is a shimmery light blue with snowflakes on it and a silver bow is stuck to the top.  “Merry Christmas.”  He says.

“Frohe Weihnachten.”  You reply taking the gift from him.

Carefully you pull the paper away to reveal an old, black velvet ring box.  You open it and nestled inside is a simple, delicate, vintage engagement ring.  It has a gold band and a row of four, solitaire cut diamonds.

“Is it your mom’s ring?”  You ask, staring at it.

“Yes.”  He answers.

“How?”

He runs his hand through his hair and kneels in front of you.  “Nat.”  He answers.  “I love you, and I meant it when I said I wanted to marry you.”

“I want to have this baby, Steve.”   You say.  Your voice cracking.  A tear slips down your cheek and with that one renegade others follow until you find yourself crying a deep inconsolable cry.

He holds you and strokes your hair.  “Shh.”  He says.  “It’s okay.  We can work this out.  It will work out. I promise.”

“What are we going to do?”  You ask.  The words come out stuttered.  You sound like a little kid who’s mid-tantrum and can’t get their breath under control to form words properly.

“I don’t know.  Maybe if we go to Wakanda.  It might be asking a lot, but King T’challa is protecting Bucky.  Maybe he’ll extend that to us until we can work out something else.”

A cell phone starts ringing.  You look at Steve startled.  It’s not a ring you’ve heard before.  Steve jumps away from you like he’s been burned and scrambles to find the phone.  He presses accept call and holds it to his ear.  His body straightens out and his shoulders square off.  When he speaks, it’s formal and authoritative.  Not the voice of Steve Rogers.  The voice of a man you hate.  The voice of Captain America.  “Tony?”  He says.  “What’s happened?”

// NEXT

[allthephils]

Questionable

Word count: 1767 Rated E (smut, strangers to lovers, public sex, valentine’s Day) Written for @phandomficfests Dates flash fest (just under the wire!)

Read on AO3

Dan’s date went very badly and Phil’s didn’t go at all. Good thing they found eachother.

“Should we be doing this?” Phil keeps glancing over his shoulder. He can see right over the stall door. It would be pretty awkward if anyone walked in and made eye contact. “It’s just a little seedy isn’t it, a public toilet? Your knees are going to be all covered in disease.” He laughs a little at his rhyme.

 There’s a beautiful man on his knees in front of Phil. His name is Dan and his mouth is full so he doesn’t answer right away but he stops moving and looks up. Damn those lashes. “Don’t stop.” Phil says quickly then rests his head back and closes his eyes. “Why is this stall so short?” Now is not the time for nervous chatter but Phil can’t seem to reign it in. He’s never done anything like this.

 Dan is licking his cock, like proper licking it, like it’s an ice lolly. There’s spit running down and over his balls and it’s just obscene and so hot.

 “It’s not short, you’re tall.” Dan says between licks. “If someone comes in, just duck your head.”

 Phil wonders what the fuck he’s doing. He’s not cut out for this kind of debauchery. Dan’s lips drag a wet trail from base to tip and the arguments in Phil’s mind start to muddle.

 2 hours ago

 Phil looks good. He’s wearing his new black jumper with the little flecks of silver and jeans that haven’t yet had time to fade. The quiff is in rare form tonight and his moisturizing routine is really starting to pay off. He smells good too, like the bespoke fragrance he treated himself to as a self-love Valentine’s Day gift. Phil doesn’t go on many second dates, mostly owing to the fact that he doesn’t go on many first dates.

 There’s no one else at the bar and most of the tables are empty. It’s not exactly a romantic spot but this is where he wanted to meet. He said it’s his favorite dive, that they make great drinks. Phil worried that Valentine’s day was too much pressure for a second date but he’d said it would be fun, low key. So here Phil sits, alone, sipping a fruity drink, buzzing with anticipation, avoiding the the expectant gaze of the bartender.

 It was a great first date. They’d shared a great meal with a great view of the city. He had a dark, wry sense of humor and a weird little hipster mustache. Potential is a new and exciting thing. They’d kissed at the end of the night and he’d stood on his toes to reach Phil’s lips. Phil’s heart jumps a little at the memory. He’ll be here any minute.

 1 hour ago

 “Can I get you another one?” The bartender’s voice has gotten softer each time she’s asked. Phil can’t look her in the eye so he just shakes his head. His cheeks feel a little numb. He’s clearly going home alone so he should probably stop while he can still walk a straight line.

 “For the love of god, please get me a fucking drink.” The bartender seems to know the guy ordering her around, she’s unbothered, smiling at him as she’s pours his unspecified drink. “And whatever he’s having.” He jerks his head toward Phil and before he really knows what’s happening, he’s got a fresh cocktail waiting.

 Phil’s eyes dart between his drink and the guy who bought it, then back again. He wants to say thank you but there’s a steady stream of vitriol coming from the guy’s mouth and he doesn’t want to interrupt.

 “This is what I get for dating an American. He’s in the NRA, the NRA!” He gulps his drink. “Can you believe that?”

 “I know lots of cool Americans.” The bartender leans and listens, tempering his outburst as best she can.

 “Yeah, I know, so do I. Just let me vent.” She reaches out and gives his shoulder a squeeze before starting to tidy the bar, still listening. He goes on, “I never fucking date, never. I hook up, I mind my own business. Go on a date, Dan. Download Tinder, Dan. You deserve more, Dan. Fuck.”

 Phil startles. Dan nearly yelled at the end there. His bartender friend gives him a look and he sighs.

 “Sorry.” He necks the last of his drink and a new one appears like magic. “It’s just, it’s not like I was looking to get married. I just thought a little connection, some intelligent conversation could only make the fucking better, right?”

 Phil sputters, choking on his drink a bit and Dan slowly turns to look at him. “Did I offend your delicate sensibilities?”

 Phil clears his throat. “No, your just a little, loud. Thanks for the drink.”

 “No problem.” Dan says. “By the sound of you, it’s not your first.”

 Phil doesn’t say anything, just stares into his nearly empty glass.

 “You’re alone at a bar on Valentine’s Day and you’re pissed. I’m guessing... poorly timed breakup?”

 Phil finally looks directly at this so called Dan. Oh dear, he’s pretty.

 “Hello.” Phil squeaks.

 Dan laughs, “Hi there.”

 “I got stood up. Second date. He has a mustache.”

 “You should have known better.” Dan moves down the bar one stool so he’s sat right next to Phil.

 “You’re pretty.” Phil says, his brain too mushy to stop him.

 “Thank you.” Dan says sincerely, “you are also very pretty.” He chuckles a laugh and shakes his head.

 “Thanks.” Phil says, hand over his heart. “Can I ask you something that I definitely wouldn’t ask if I were sober?”

 “Sure.”

 “You’re single, yeah?”

 “Yes.” Dan wears a look of amusement.

 “One more?” Phil asks and Dan gestures for him to go on.

 Phil leans toward Dan a bit, bracing himself on the bar, “Are you gay?” His whisper is comically loud.

 “Mostly, yes.”

 Dan has the cutest little quirk to his lips. Phil’s eyes have settled there and he watches Dan’s tongue peek out to wet them. He feels brave, tipsy and angry and sad and brave.

 “You should finish your drink and invite me back to yours.” Phil’s heart beats like a drum, nerves have his arm hairs standing on end but he said it, it’s out there.

 “Is that so?” Dan says. He tilts his head, looks Phil up and down, then glances around the nearly empty room. “That’s a bold idea.”

 He bites his lip and Phil stands up. He’s never kissed anyone in a bar. It’s tacky, he doesn’t do that sort of thing, but if Dan keeps drawing attention to his mouth like this, Phil’s not sure he can resist.

 “I’ve got a better one.” Dan says and takes Phil’s hand. He leads him away from the bar, past the empty booths and tables, through a curtain and into the men’s toilets.

 ***

So here he his, pants around his thighs, fingers tangled in a stranger’s silky curls. Most of his brain has gone into full pleasure mode. Stay up late, eat sushi off of people, order milkshakes at midnight. You only live once. Unfortunately, a tiny but very loud piece of his brain is terrified. It’s the terribly annoying rule abiding lobe. Always ruining his fun, reminding him he has to get up in the morning, that he could get caught, that skinny dipping is technically illegal, and there could be ferocious beasts in the woods.

 Dan is stroking him with some real goal oriented focus. Those lips Phil was so focused on are now wrapped around his tip, suckling and slurping and pulling out a moan louder than Phil intended it to be.

 The distant sound of laughter shocks Phil into keen awareness of his surroundings. His eyes wide, he looks toward the door. That tiny piece of his brain is getting louder, drowning out the pleasure. He squeezes his eyes shut, breathes deep, tries to will away his rational side.

 “Phil?” Dan slows his strokes and sits back on his heels. “Do you want me to stop?”

 Phil sighs and looks down at those gorgeous brown eyes. He can’t believe what he’s saying as it slips out. “Yeah. Yeah, I’m sorry.”

 Dan stands and tucks Phil back into his pants, leaving him to deal with his jeans.

 “Don’t be sorry. I hope I didn’t pressure you.” He leans back on the opposite wall and Phil has a second to look him over in the light.

 “You didn’t.”

 Dan reaches into his jeans, adjusting himself, before stuffing his hand into his pockets. “Did I do something wrong?”

 He’s too pretty, too dimpled and tall. His eyes are too brown and his hands are too strong. His voice too soft and melty like the something you’d pour over crepes eaten in bed in an expensive hotel. Phil dives forward, crashing into Dan. He doesn’t bother to press their lips together, he leads with his tongue, desperately licking into Dan’s mouth, rolling his hips so their cocks collide over and over. He grabs at Dan’s shirt, fisting it to pull him upright, until Dan’s hand is on his chest pushing him away.

 “Woah. Phil.” His breathing is heavy as he catches up. “You’re kinda sending mixed signals here, mate.”

 “Sorry.” Phil straightens up. “You just look really good.” Dan grins and blushes a little, as if he didn’t know Phil found him attractive. “I can’t stop worrying. This is just too public, I’m sorry.”

 “First of all, stop apologizing. It’s fine. Second, I’ve got a flat with a pretty amazing view. Does that sound more agreeable?”

 “Yeah it does.” Phil is baffled, “You’d take me there?”

 “Of course.”

 “Why didn’t we go there in the first place?”

 Dan looks toward the fluorescent lights, thinking for moment. “Valentine’s is a little hard for me. It’s like, I’m fine, I’m ok on my own. But then this day comes and shouts at me. And suddenly I’m reminded of something I didn’t know I was missing. Do you know what I mean?”

 “Yeah, I think I do.” Phil answers quietly.

 “I guess I didn’t want to wait.” Dan says, holding the cubicle door open for Phil. “I have a lot of heavy emotional shit to work out.” He chuckles and shrugs. God, he’s cute. Cute and honest and good at blow jobs.

 “OK.” Phil watches Dan fix his hair in the mirror. “And you want to work it out with me?”

 “On you.” Dan adds, “I want to work it out on you.”

 He laughs again and Phil’s not sure how he’s meant to respond but he just says, “Let’s go.”

[lakinda5654]

~~~~A Girl and A God~~~~ Chapter 19- Unexpected

—————————————————

A Girl and A God is a RATED M Loki Fanfic with an original character, Alexa, who is taken in by Tony Stark after the revelation of abilities of her own. There’s sex, romance, heartbreak, action, fluff, angst, all that good stuff. Full description in blog, and a jump-to-chapter list if you just want the smut or the cuteness bits. Enjoy <3 

Chapter Summary: Loki and Alexa spend a cute morning together, then they are given an unexpected surprise...

Contains: cuteness, friendship development

Word Count: 1,661

~Previous Chapter~~Next Chapter~

~~Beginning of Story~~

—————————————————

The next morning, Loki woke to a wonderfully sweet aroma filling their room. Alexa was at the small stove, messing with something in a pan.

She’d gotten bored that morning and decided to make Loki breakfast.

Without warning, she felt his cool hands wrapping around her waist. She took a sharp breath in, then immediately calmed at the sound of his voice.

“Good morning petal” he spoke softly in her ear with his warm, deep voice. “What are you preparing for me?”

“Bold to assume it’s for you” Alexa smiled.

He nibbled her ear gently, causing her heart rate to speed up. “Bold to assume I wouldn’t steal it if it wasn’t.” His tone was so smooth and deep beyond sexy in the morning. It gave Alexa chills.

He unwrapped his bare arms from around her and looked at what she was doing.

“They’re called Crepes. Have you had them before?”

She glanced back at Loki who shook his head.

“They’re my favorite breakfast food.” She scooped up the one in her pan and flipped it onto a plate. “You fill it with all this. You can make it however you want. There’s berries, powdered sugar, chocolate syrup, lemon juice, yogurt, and a bunch of other stuff.”

 Loki listened intently. “Well, it smells delicious.”

“It is. Oh and whipped cream. My favorite combination is whipped cream, raspberries, powdered sugar, and a dash of lemon juice.” She created her masterpiece as she spoke, and he watched her. When she shook up the whipped cream and dispensed it, she saw him raise his eyebrows. “What in Valhalla is that…”

“Oh, it’s whipped cream.” Suddenly, Alexa got brave in front of her shirtless god. She dispensed some on her finger, walked so close to him they were chest to chest and held it up to his mouth. He looked at her, surprised, then saw the mischievous look on her face and she saw the corner of his mouth upturn. He took her cream-covered finger into his mouth and sucked on it a bit, then licked it for good measure. 

“Mmm,” he hummed. “That is unexpectedly delightful.” He knew it had aroused her, and he saw her blush to prove it.

As she set the table, Alexa had a nagging question and had to break the mood. “Loki… I have a question.”

He raised his eyebrows at her expectantly.

“Why are you always so cold? Like I’ve just noticed with little things. Like your tongue and mouth are cold, and your bare skin… you always seem unnaturally chilling. Is that just me? Is it a god thing? or Asgardian thing?”

His demeanor changed entirely. “No Petal- it’s not just you. It’s part of me I really don’t want to share at the moment.” He touched her chin, tilting her head up. “I want to enjoy this breakfast with you, and I will explain it later.” He smiled warmly, kissed her forehead, and turned back to the counter to prepare his food.

Alexa was not one to let things go, she wanted an answer. But the fact that he wanted to spend the morning with her warmed her heart and she forced herself to wait.

He loaded his crepes with berries and sugar as she had. Alexa sat at the table and ate, and Loki soon joined her with his food. His first bite left his face looking surprised. “I must say your Midguardian food continues to surprise me.” He said as he cut another bite with his fork.

Alexa was about to reply when she heard a knock.

Both their eyes widened and she frantically stood up and roughly whispered. “Hide fucking hide!”

Loki slipped silently into the bathroom and Alexa put his dish on the counter so it wouldn’t look like the table was seated for two. Whoever was at the door knocked again.

 “Coming!” She rushed over, took a deep breath, smoothed herself out, and opened the door.

Peter.

“Ok so I know this is weird and it’s early and I’m sorry cuz you were probably asleep but maybe not cuz u live on moon juice or whatever right, but I found something and I didn’t know what to do so I picked it up and I thought if I went to anyone else they’d make me get rid of it or something and I don’t want to and I don’t know what to do.”

“Peter… What?”

He pulled a kitten out of his sweatshirt.

There was a moment of confused silence.

“Peter why the fuck… why do you have a kitten”

“I just told you I found it and it’s really cute right and, ok so I found it cuz I went to McDonald’s because I wanted hash browns and this guy had a whole box of them so I was like aww cute right and then someone else came and was looking at them and I went inside and ate my hash browns and then I came back out cuz I was done and there was literally just one kitten left and The guy was all like “this one has your name on it kid” and I was like no cuz I live in Avengers tower and like I don’t think they allow pets right but it’s not like I signed a lease or whatever so I don’t know, but of course I didn’t say that to the old guy I was just like “no thanks” and then he set down the box and was like it’s yours and I didn’t know what to do but he left and there was just the one and I had to come back but now I have a kitten.”

Alexa stared blankly at him for a moment. “Peter what the fuck”

“Could you keep it in here? Just cuz like I don’t have a way of keeping it because Mr. Stark is always coming in my room you know and like talking to me about training or helping me train or making me meet a new bodyguard because they quit a lot and I really don’t think Mr. Stark would like Thunder.”

“Thunder?”

“Oh yeah cuz he’s gray I thought his name could be Thunder but like we don’t have to name him that I just thought it fit him with his paws cuz they seem too big for his body and I just think if we could keep him here, and then I could take care of him you’d just have to let me in now and then. Then we could also hang out more too cuz like I thought that maybe we could be friends because everyone else here is literally like a thousand years old, I mean a couple of them actually are let’s be real. So will you do it? Can he stay here?”

He didn’t know how much he was asking. Having him pop in and out all the time would seriously endanger Loki to being found out.

“Peter I really can’t…”

Upon seeing he was about to get rejected, he got a little more desperate.

He tilted his head and began to beg her. “Pleaseee please please cats are like so low maintenance and I’ll buy everything just please…”

“Oh my god, fine Peter I’ll-”

“Oh my god YES thank you so much I will go get everything and we can keep it a secret ok and do you want to name it Thunder?”

Alexa looked down at the little cat. “Sure, why not.”

“Ok sweet I will deal with all of it thank you thank you thank-” 

Alexa cut him off. “Ok but you need to understand something. You ALWAYS knock ok? And I’ll take care of him most of the time just if you get the supplies and come by when you want to play with it then that will be fine.”

“Ok sweet I will do that okay and here you go, he’s still really fragile and I think he likes cheez-its, but I’ll get him real kitten food and all that”

“Ok Peter. I’m gonna go back in my room now.”

“Right ok so bye I’ll see you later then thank you so much.”

She shut the door. Holding a kitten.

Loki walked out of the bathroom. He walked up to her, and she realized what a mistake she’d just made when she saw his face. “Have you gone mad?” He spat. 

The kitten chose that moment to let out a tiny, high pitched “mew”

He stared at the creature, then at Alexa. “We are on day one of this and you’ve given access to our room to that loose cannon of a boy?”

Alexa was quiet. “ I know. I’m sorry. I really think it will be fine I told him to always knock and…”

“What you’ve done was foolish. What if stark hears about this creature and decides to check in on me?”

“I’m sorry Loki.” He turned away from her, grabbing at his hair.

“I just, I kind of also wanted a pet.”

He turned and looked at her. “Why? Are you so lonely? I’m right here. I’m bloody locked in your room. I don’t understand why you would have a desire for this infant mammal.”

“Because, Loki... You sleep.”

Loki looked at her and realized he hadn’t thought about what she had to do for all those hours of the night, and how no one was awake but her. He looked at the kitten again and sighed.

“Thunder, is it?”

“I guess so”

She vaguely heard Loki mutter something under his breath something about the concept of Thunder and it’s unending capacity to fuck up his life.

Loki reached down and picked him up. “The name suits the bastard,” he said roughly. Alexa was looking at the animal, a bit worried for it in Loki’s large, tense hands.

His anger had calmed. “I suppose if it pleases you…” and handed the furball back to her.

[sound-of-inspiration]

HQ!! Valentine Exchange

Fandom: Haikyuu!!

Pairing/Characters: Daishou Suguru/Yamaka Mika

Rating: General (G)

Tags: Established Relationship, Running Late, Light Cursing

A.N. Happy late Valentine’s Day @stateofshambles!!! <333 I am really sorry this is so late, but I do hope you enjoy it nonetheless! Have a great evenning/day! :D Thank you to @hqvalentineexchange as well for organizing this great event! :3

“God damn it! Get the fuck out of my way.” Suguru cursed under his breath as he pushed past another set of people, who threw him dirty looks. But right now he couldn’t care less of what anyone else was thinking of him.

He didn’t have time to stop and apologize to every adult he was bumping into, not having the patience to get a lecture from any of them. One old lady had already opened her mouth, which had gotten him to lightly bow in apology before dashing of again.

Suguru was already late enough.

“Mika-chan will have my head.” He thought to himself bitterly, while taking two steps at a time up from the underground and out into the cool winter air. His senses didn’t even register the cold hitting his face or the white, little flakes settling into his hair. He quickly scanned the area for the direction he had to go in and was off again, sprinting down the sidewalk.

This was definitely not how he had hoped for his first Valentine’s Day with Mika to go. Not after they had both been quite busy as of late and this would be their first official date in a while.

Suguru had had it planned out perfectly. He had made a reservation in one of the restaurants Mika had always talked to him about. Had made sure, that he had gotten the flowers, she oh so adored and even had gotten her a little gift.

But of course, life could never go as you wanted it to.

First thing in the morning he hadn’t heard his alarm clock, which already had robbed Suguru off over two hours, that he’d slept in. Then he had managed to burn himself while making a quick breakfast, a bandage now wrapped around his right wrist. And then he even had left his family’s apartment without the flowers and the gift, both of them laying forgotten in his bedroom. But when he had noticed that, he’d already been in the underground on his way and couldn’t go back or he’d be even more late.

At least he’d remembered to tame his hair and put on the right clothes, which were clinging to his body from sweating as he rounded the last corner and finally came into view with his desired location.

Slowly he came to a halt, all the while trying to catch his breath and looking around frequently to spot Mika somewhere. With a groan he doubled over putting his hands on his knees to not fall, his eyes still looking around for a familiar head of hair.

“Fuck...Did she already leave?” Suguru mumbled to himself after a few more moments. Pulling out his phone from his pocket he checked the time and slowly let himself fall into a crouch his back against the wall of the restaurant he and Mika were supposed to be in right now.

12:21pm.

They had agreed to meet here at 12pm to have lunch together, but looking at the time…

“God damn it.” With a groan Suguru let the back of his head fall against the brick wall and closed his eyes in defeat. There was no way, that Mika would still be here. He didn’t stop himself from bumping his head against the stone a few times, calling himself stupid over and over again in his mind.

He’d messed up. Again.

Caught up in his own thoughts Suguru didn’t hear the hurried steps coming closer until a sweet, high voice called out his name.

“Suguru-kun!”

His eyes snapped open immediately and he jumped up from his crouched down position whipping his head around to see Mika rushing up towards him, hair in a disarray and an apologetic expression on her face.

“Mika-chan.”

The young girl came to a stop in front of him desperately trying to catch her breath. “I...I am so sorry...I...and nap...and my hair...and your...Ha-Ah!”

She reached down to squeeze her side, face scrunching up in pain.

“Hey...Hey. It’s okay.” Suguru tried to calm her down and gently settled his hand over hers. “Take a few deep breaths first. You can tell me after you’ve calmed down.”

Mika nodded a few times, turning her hand and intertwining their fingers while still taking in big gulps of air. Chest moving rapidly and her other hand coming up to right up the ponytail she had chosen to wear today. When she felt Suguru’s watchful eyes on her, her cheeks took on an even deeper reddish colour.

“Better?”

She nodded, but before Suguru could even open his mouth once more everything broke out of her. Her lips moving at a rapid speed, all the while she never let go of her boyfriend’s hand at her side. “I am so sorry, Suguru-kun. For being late. You must have thought, that I’d stood you up.”

“Wha-”

“I was up late with my mother yesterday, because we wanted to see the end of a series we had just about 3 episodes left. And then I got up really early today, because I wanted to finish the chocolate I had made for you yesterday. I did, but then I was so tired and thought to myself, that a nap couldn’t hurt. So I set myself an alarm and laid down. But somehow I must’ve forgot to really activate it, because I woke up about 20 minutes before I had to leave. So-So I rushed to get ready and then my hair decided to be difficult and in all the haste I now also forgot your chocolate AND am almost half an hour late to our date. I am so sorry, Suguru-kun. I really am!”

Said boy stared at her in disbelief, taking everything she’d said in and tried to process it in his mind. And when it finally clicked he couldn’t help himself but snort, which got Mika to draw her eyebrows together.

“Why are you laugh-”

“No, no.” Suguru immediately interrupted her carefully and squeezed her hand to show Mika, that he was not laughing about her. “It’s just…I haven’t gotten here until about 2 minutes before you, Mika-chan.”

“Huh?” Her big, beautiful eyes blinked up at him in confusion.

“Let’s just say...My day was just as miserable as yours.” He confessed bashfully lifting his arm to rub the back of his neck, which caught Mika’s attention as she could see the bandage peeking out from under the jacket’s sleeve.

“What is that? Are you alright, Suguru-kun?” She asked in immediate concern causing Suguru’s features to soften and smile at her gently.

“I am.” He said. “Now that I’m here with you, knowing that I didn’t mess up.”

Then he glanced at the restaurant behind them and sighed dragging a hand through his hair. “I guess our table will have been given to someone else by now, so...How about something spontaneous? Crepes?”

“And a walk through the park?” Mika added with a smile on her face as she took Suguru’s offered hand.

“Sounds good to me. Maybe we can also stop by that cat café you’ve been dropping hints of for weeks?”

A rosy blush rose to her cheeks. “You caught that?”

“‘Course, I did. I always listen to you.” Suguru replied and lifted their joined hands to press a light kiss against the back of Mika’s, which caused her cheeks to flush a lovely, pink colour.

“I’d really love that, Suguru-kun.” She said with a smile visible on her beautiful features.

In the end, Suguru thought as he watched Mika play with an excited kitten about an hour later when the had found a table in the cat café, this day took a turn for the better after they’ve both embraced and had laughed off the miserable start of it.

Valentine’s Day saved.

Because after all, Mika’s laughter and her joy were the best gift she could have given him any day. And vice versa, it was the same.

[def-initely-soul]

babe @everybodykpops tagged me in this years ago and I’m sorry I got to it now!

last

1. drink - cappucino

2. phone call - my mom

3. text message - my best friend and roommate Nikoleta aka @taitarin

4. song you listened to - Good Boy - Taeyang & G-dragon

5. time you cried - can’t even remember (maybe last month? idk)

ever

6. dated someone twice - was tempted but thank god I avoided that

7. kissed someone and regretted it - hmmm not sure...?

8. been cheated on - I believe no

9. lost someone special - haven’t we all at some point in our lives?

10. been depressed - I don’t know for sure ‘cause depression is a serious matter, not to be taken lightly but let’s just say I was at a bad place last year. Now I’m better though

11. gotten drunk and thrown up - ahahahhahahahahahahahhahh yes

fave colours

12. black

13. dark forest green

14. blood red

in the last year have you…

15. made new friends - yeeees and I’m so happy to have met every single one

16. fallen out of love - I wasn’t in love either so I guess not

17. laughed until you cried - most of the times ( @taitarin I’m looking at you)

18. found out someone was talking about you - yes and well it didn’t end well for them

19. met someone who changed you - I think it’s safe to say yes

20. found out who your friends are - yes, please refer to question 18.

21. kissed someone on your facebook friends list - yes

general

22. how many of your facebook friends do you know irl - almost everyone

23. do you have any pets - noooo :(

24. do you want to change your name - I used to want to change it, but I came to love it recently

25. what did you do for your last birthday - Me and my besties went out for drinks 

26. what time did you wake up today - 13:03 (I’m a lazy person I know xD)

27. what were you doing at midnight last night - studying for my exams

28. what is something you can’t wait for - for exam period to end!

30. what are you listening to right now - Dean - Instagram (saw it on Bee’s list and I had to)

31. have you ever talked to a person named tom - I don’t think so

32. something that’s getting on your nerves - Lying to my face when I know the truth (prepare for destruction)

33. most visited website - facebook, tumblr

34. hair colour - raven black <3

35. long or short hair - medium

36. do you have a crush on someone - Do all these korean kpop idols count?

37. what do you like about yourself - I’m slowly becoming more confident in myself, something I’ve been trying to achieve for years

38. want any piercings? - An industrial one!

39. blood type - I don’t have the slightest idea

40. nicknames - Marysam, Maraki, Cadela ( @maliby  👀)

41. relationship status - single as fuck

42. zodiac - scorpio/virgo

43. pronouns - she/her

44. fave tv shows - Fringe, Stranger Things, Rick and Morty, Glee, The 100

45. tattoos - One at the back side of my lower leg, a single star

46. right or left handed - right

47. ever had surgery - nope

48. piercings - the standard ones on each ear, plus a septum (I used to have a lip ring and a regular nose one but I got rid of them)

49. sport -  does dancing count?

50. vacation - been to: London, Prague, Budapest, Bratislava, want to go to: EVERYWHERE

51. trainers - only one pair I barely use

more general

52. eating - just ordered a crepe!

53. drinking - nothing atm

54. i’m about to watch - Rick and Morty

55. waiting for - the page to load

56. want - to relax

57. get married - um, no

58. career - getting a degree in geology plus studying Musical Theater (ik they’re not related at all)

which is better

59. hugs or kisses - kisses

60. lips or eyes - eyes

61. shorter or taller - taller 

62. older or younger - I prefer older or same age, but I wouldn’t mind a younger one if the difference was small

63. nice arms or stomach - arms

64. hookup or relationship - can I leave this one unanswered?

65. troublemaker or hesitant - troublemaker

have you ever

66. kissed a stranger - nope

67. drank hard liquor - yes

68. lost glasses - never

69. turned someone down - yeap

70. sex on first date - tried to but nope

71. broken someone’s heart - yes

72. had your heart broken - also yes

73. been arrested - nope

74. cried when someone died - yes

75. fallen for a friend - yes

do you believe in

76. yourself - I’m beginning to

77. miracles - nope

78. love at first sight - nope

79. santa claus - again nope

80. kiss on a first date - yes

81. angels - nope

other

82. best friend’s name - Elizabeth, Nikoleta, Martha and Fabiola

83. eye colour -jade green

84. fave movie - Dead Poets Society and The Phantom Of The Opera

85. fave actor - idk 

Tagging: @maliby @messyscriptorium @tokyoblack @ellrouxx @chessireneko @taitarin @i-dontlike-i-obsess @yoonseoksofty @taetaetrashhh @daegusoftboys @whoatheresparkie and anyone else that wants to do it!

[imagine-that-one-thing]

Can you do 12 & 18 for Shawn or harry, whichever one you have more inspo for

Authors Note:

Requested || Based off of #12 & 18 prompt found here 

“I’m pregnant.” .. “It’s okay to cry…”

He lives for being free, touring the world, singing, and doing what he loves the most, performing to his fans, there is absolutely nothing he would rather be doing. Even after five long years, five albums, and many achieved awards, he is still as lively, and as happy as ever, not to mention— married and loving it. 

You're always jet setting to many places around the world, it is at a point where you spend more time in other countries and cities than you do your own. 

You and Shawn have joked about selling the house because the two of you spend more time in airports and in hotels that you are barely at the house, in fact, his little sister has basically moved in, taking the guest bedroom and making it her own when the two of you are away. Shawn was apprehensive about her being on her own, but he had to learn how to loosen up and not be the over protective older brother, at eighteen, you assured him that she would be fine house sitting the house. You both always managed to call her daily to check up on her despite her parents doing the same thing. 

You also quite like that Aaliyah has taken over the guest room, you love having her around when you are actually home, she is like your adopted teenager that you love to death. 

The hotel room is quiet and cosy as you stay curled up between the white duvet, snuggling into the freshly scented covers, Shawn's figure standing at the window that has the view of the city—a view he has struggled to pull his eyes from. 

"I think we need an apartment with a view like this, what do yeh say?" He peers over his shoulder to look over at you with his darling smile and bright eyes, "Breakfast on a patio, overlooking the Eiffel tower, I think that is a wonderful idea. Wouldn't you like to wake up to crepes, strawberries, croissants, Tartine, and a café au lait?" He names off a few of the wonderful choices of foods' he has managed to taste in the short time he has been in France. 

You screw your nose up for a moment, burying your nose into the covers, the thought of food not settling too well with you. 

"Mhm, lovely." You lie, not wanting to even think about Croissant aux abricots, Pain au chocolat, or whatever other kind of buttery pastry and jam that Shawn is more than likely thinking of at the moment. 

He shuffles away from the extended window, striding towards the bed, "Okay, what's up with you? Usually, you are begging me to go with you to try new breakfast things. You don't even seem remotely interested at the moment." Shawn stands at the foot of the bed, cocking his head to the side as you continue to snuggle up to the covers. 

"Just tired," you mumble, 

His brows knit in a frown, "Hmm, you sure? You kinda look a bit... off." 

With a heavy sigh you speak, "Thank you for saying I look terrible, Shawn." you mutter, watching as he instantly shakes his head, "Don't bother justifying yourself," you chuckle, calmly amused by the expression painted across his face. 

He sighs and curls his lips into a pout, "I didn't mean it like that, you know I always think you look beautiful." 

"You have to say that, you married me. Don't you have a Q&A to get to?" you change the subject, not wanting to really discuss the fact that he always thinks you look stunningly beautiful, even when you are dressed in nothing by a pair of pyjama pants, and an oversized t-shirt, with your hair a mess. 

To him, you are everything he loves, no matter how you look. 

"I do," he nods, "You trying to get rid of me?" he raises a brow, crossing his arms over his chest, 

"Nope, just askin'." You respond, watching as he moves away from the foot of the bed and makes his way over towards his jacket that is draped over the chair. 

He hums as he grabs his jacket, sliding it up his length arms, "You wanna come? It is a short Q&A before my concert, I don't even have a meet and greets today." He informs you, flashing you his bright eyes that denote that he really wants you to attend, even if he won't say it. 

He loves when you attend his shows, even if he doesn't see you in the crowd, or if you stay backstage— he especially loves flicking his eyes to the side of the stage to see you as he catches his breath. 

The crowd always knows when you are backstage watching because every so often while catching his breath he flicks his head to the side, his smile becoming wide before he looks back towards his audience, his smile still plastered across his face. There's just something different about him when you're there. Everyone knows it. 

You stand towards the side during the most part of the Q&A, listening and chuckling to the questions, watching as Shawn would occasionally nervously chuckle and muster up a response to some of the questions. 

It was half way through the questions that you started to feel terrible nausea that had been creeping up on you since early in the morning.

For the last few days at around two-thirty, you've been feeling nauseous and today, right on queue, you felt it, but this time it was enough to send you over the edge and hiding out in the bathroom for the rest of the Q&A. 

After a while you force yourself to emerge from the bathroom, stepping out into the backstage hallway area, blinking owlishly, you see Shawn at the end of the hall. Shawn instantly spots you and marches towards you, 

"I have been looking all over for you for the last thirty minutes," he sighs, narrowing his eyes down onto you, "I looked to the side and you were gone and never came back, did one of the questions upset you or something?" he cocks his head to his side, his thumb benevolently brushing under your eye, "You've been crying, what's the matter?" he whispers, the pad of his thumb fixing the smudged mascara under your eye.

You tried your best in the bathroom to fix it, you had hoped Shawn would be far too busy to notice your mascara or the fact you had been missing. "Y/N.." he draws your name out in the tone of voice he uses when he wants you to talk to him and tell him what is going on in that pretty mind of yours, 

"I'm not feeling great, can we talk?" you question, your eyes darting around to notice a few of his team wandering around, "in private?" you whisper, not wanting to have any sort of discussion where anyone can hear what you have to say. 

He hums his response, wrapping an arm around you, leading you around backstage, dismissing anyone that tries to talk to him, politely telling them, "I can't talk right now." 

He pushes his dressing room door open, allowing you to step inside it first as he closes the door behind him. You sit down and relax into the seat, your hand resting on your stomach, 

"Do you want me to get you anything? You're not looking too good, honey." He offers, taking note of your slightly paled complexion getting sick managed to leave you with.

"No, I am fine," you assure him, a little nervous for what you have to tell him, "You're going to want to sit down for this," you gesture towards the other seat and he doesn't waste any time with sitting down, waiting for you to talk, squaring an ankle over one knee.

"How do you feel about a bit of a change?" you challenge, attempting to stop your nerves from causing you to blurt things out without easing him into it. 

He is not the kind of guy to just spring things on.

He tilts his head to one side while listening, his thoughts twirling before he speaks, "What do you mean? Like changing your hair type of change, or moving countries type of change?" 

"Uhm... I guess moving countries type of change." 

Shawn hums, keeping his eyes focused on you, "Mhm, I am listening," he nods, "If you're wondering if we can sell the house, the answer is no," he chuckles, lightening the mood a little, causing your own giggle to escape your lips. 

"No, it isn't that." ... "So, remember two months ago  when we were in Barcelona, you were writing a few songs, and stuff?" 

He grins, "Yes, wrote a few songs, had a few too many to drink." 

"Mhm... and we also spent like two days in the hotel room." you delicately remind him of the two days spent between the sheets with the do-not-disturb sign on the door. 

He laughs softly, "Quite a good time," 

"Uh huh, it was... so, I haven't told you, but the last few days' I have been nauseous." 

"Yeah, I picked up on that. I am sorry about that darlin', I think I gave you the bug I had last week." He sighs, "Do you want to go back to the hotel? Is that why you were missing for like an hour?" 

You nod, "Yeah," 

"I am sorry, hon, I told you not to kiss me and to stay with me."

"You didn't give me the bug, Shawn.... Although, you did give me something else." You nervously inform him, observing as he calmly awaits for you to tell him what is going on. 

You inhale a deep breath and blow out slowly, “I’m pregnant.” You breathe out, his eyes growing wide and glossy, 

"What?" He clears his throat, "Are you sure?" 

You confirm with a nod, "I took a test while you were at the gym yesterday." ... "And, I know this is a lot to put on you, so if you need to like vent, freak out, or whatever, go ahead." 

He stares at you, his eyes lustrous, his lips pursed into a fine line, “It’s okay to cry…” you add, unsure of how exactly he is taking the news, he looks as though tears are about to fall from his copper-colored eyes. 

You cried until Shawn got back into the hotel when you found out, both happy and sad tears. 

"You're actually carrying our baby?" He finally speaks, his lips curving up into a smile. "There's a baby in there?" He gestures towards your stomach your hand is resting on,

"Mhm, I am pretty sure it is like the size of a pea, but he or she is there." ... "Nestled inside me, making me sick, but they're there," You laugh, seeing as a few tears slide down his cheeks, 

"Holy fuck, can I hug you?" he stands to his feet, seeming to be shocked and also overly delighted, a smile dangling on the corner of his lips, "Like, I have been waiting for a while for you to tell me. I know we haven't spoken about it or even really tried, but damn, this is amazing." he cheerily announces, opening his arms as you stand to your feet, nestling into him, his arms wrapping around you tightly. "First you made me the happiest man by becoming my wife, now you are making me the happiest Dad by carrying our child." He whispers contently in your ear. 

He carefully unwraps his arms from around you, unable to contain the smile on his face or the tears of joy cascading down his cheeks, "How do you feel about this?" 

"Good, I uh, kinda freaked out at first, but a lot better knowing you are happy about this." 

"Of course I am, can I?" he gestures his hands towards your tummy, and you nod. 

He gets down on his knees, his hand tenderly pressing to your stomach, "Hey sweetie, I just found out that you exist and I am so excited, I don't know if you can hear me, but just know I love you so much already, I already can't wait to meet you in nine months." he whispers melodiously, 

"Seven," you correct Shawn, "I think I am around eight weeks," you smirk as he stands back to his feet, towering over you, still with a smile beamed across his lips. 

"Well, I can't wait to meet our baby in seven months. So uh, do you want me to take you back to the hotel?" ... "I don't think you need to be around all this chaos." 

"Are you going to be overly protective?" You chuckle, watching as he proudly nods, 

"You know it," 

"I am fine to watch your show," 

"And how are you feeling? Do you want me to get you anything? water, food, a blanket—"

"Shawn," you cut him off promptly, "I am fine, I don't need anything besides for you to relax and prepare for your show.. Oh, and try not to announce it to everyone, I would prefer to wait for the ultrasound and stuff." 

"My lips are sealed." .. "Alright, c'mon, let's go before they send a search party out for me." He kisses your cheek before taking your hand, leading you out of the dressing room and walking around backstage to get to where he needs to be.

[sethmurfie-blog]

BETRAYAL - [Feb. 10, 1:07 a.m.]

CALEB MURFIE I WILL FUCKING END YOU. I. WILL—

FUCK. GOD FUCKING DAMNIT CALEB.

ALRIGHT. HERE'S WHAT OCCURRED.

BEFORE ME AND CALEB HEADED OUT TO THE MASQUERADE CRAWL, I JUST HAD TO FIND HIM BECAUSE HE'D TOLD ME TO MEET UP BY THE FRONT DOOR AT A CERTAIN TIME. WELL HE ENDS UP BEING NOWHERE TO BE FOUND, SO I CALL HIS NAME AND DECIDE TO PUT MY COAT ON, MY MASQUERADE MASK SITTING SAFELY WITHIN THE POCKET IN MY COAT READY FOR USE, AND I WANDER ABOUT THE NEIGHBORHOOD.

"CALEB?" I LOOK THIS WAY AND THAT, BARELY DETECTING A THING AMONG THE DARK HOUSES AND MOON-COVERED FROST. "CALEB! CALEB WHERE ARE—"

SUDDENLY I CEASE UPON APPROACHING A FIELD. I HEAR AN ODD NOISE. IN THE DISTANCE THERE'S SOME LARGE HILL THAT CHILDREN USE FOR SLEDDING ON OCCASION, BUT IT'S BARE AT THE MOMENT, EXCEPT FOR ICE AND SNOW. ALSO IN ADDITION THERE'S SOME KIND OF WEIRD MOUND IN THE MIDDLE. PLUS MY EYES DRAG A LITTLE TO THE RIGHT, TO FIND CALEB, STANDING IN FRONT OF THE HILL, DRESSED IN FULL BALL REGALIA, AND JUST HOWLING UP AT IT. SCREAMING. MAKING NOISE LIKE WHAT A DOG WOULD MAKE, BUT MORE PAINED. SOUNDING JUST INFURIATED. HE'S HOWLING AND HOWLING, ARMS STRETCHED BACK, ONE FOOT PLANTED FIRMLY IN DIRT AND SOUNDING LIKE HE'S TRYING TO HOWL ABOVE THE INCREASINGLY FREEZING WIND.

IT DOESN'T STOP UNTIL I RUN UP TO HIM: "CALEB! MY BOY WHAT EXACTLY IS IT THAT'S MASSIVELY DISTURBING YOU?" I GESTURE TOWARD THE HILL WHEN CALEB TURNS, AVIATORS NEARLY SLIPPING OFF FOR A JIFF BEFORE HE SEES ME AND GRINS. "seth, ready to go! come on let's head out!" AND HE PUSHES FORWARD, ACTING LIKE HE'S BEEN WAITING FOR ME. "come on come on let's hurry, ha-ha, bro we gotta hit this thing up and meet some ladies" AND HE'S PUSHING ME FORWARD AS HE USES THE OTHER HAND TO STRAIGHTEN HIS SUIT COLLAR. IT'S AS IF NOTHING HAD HAPPENED. AND I GUESS, NOTHING HAD.

SO BEFORE I KNOW IT WE HEAD INTO WHAT I RECOGNIZE AS ESSENTIALLY A DIMLY LIT CAFETERIA THAT'S BEEN REPURPOSED WITH STREAMERS AND, IN THE CENTER, THERE HANGS AN UTTERLY HORRIFYING GIGANTIC PAPER MACHÉ MASK WITH CREPE PAPER EYES THAT STARED AT EVERYONE DULLY, AND OUT OF THE MOUTH THERE WAS SOME KIND OF SPECIAL FOUNTAIN ATTACHED SO THAT IT WAS JUST DROOLING RAW HAMBURGER MEAT ON ANYONE WHO DARED TO STEP UNDERNEATH. TO COPE WITH THE HORROR-RAMA OF ATTENDING PARTIES WITH A CERTAIN CALEB, I'D BROUGHT ALONG SOME BOWLING PINS WHICH I GOT BUSY DECORATING WITH ANCIENT ANIMALISTIC CALLIGRAPHY AS WE WALKED THROUGH THE SEA OF MASKS. I SUDDENLY WISHED THAT PORRIDGE WAS HERE AS SHE WOULD SEE THE KRATAGANA THAT I'VE INCORPORATED INTO MY BOWLING PIN CALLIGRAPHY AND WHICH I'VE BEEN LEARNING IN ORDER TO I WOULDN'T SAY IMPRESS HER BUT YEAH CERTAINLY TO MAKE HER LIKE ME. ANYWAY THE HAMBURGER MASK WAS REALLY STARTING TO GIVE ME A THRILL WHEN CALEB BUMPED INTO ME AND MADE ME FORCE A MISTAKE ONTO MY BOWLING PIN! "CALEB!" I SAID, AND TURNED TO HIM.

"sorry, dude, jeez. wait—seth?"

"YES OBVIOUSLY WHO ELSE COULD IT BE."

"oh dude sorry. i straight-up didn't recognize you."

ALRIGHT IT WAS OBVIOUS HE HADN'T REALLY LOOKED AT ME THEN, OR NOTICED ME AS WE ENTERED BECAUSE I'D ALREADY TAKEN THE MASK OUT OF MY POCKET AND PUT IT UP UPON MY FACE, BUT CALEB WAS SO TIRELESSLY DISTRACTED.

"ALRIGHT WELL YOU SAID I HAD TO WEAR A MASK FOR A MASQUERADE BALL."

"well mission accomplished, dude. you're kinda unrecognizable. nice."

HE PATTED ME ON THE BACK BEFORE WALKING AWAY AND I SUPPOSE THIS WAS A COMPLIMENT THOUGH REALLY I WASN'T SURE AT ALL BUT ALL THOUGHTS CAME TO A SCREECHING HALT AS MORE AND MORE PEOPLE STARTED CROWDING ALL OVER INTO THE PLACE, PEOPLE MOVING THIS WAY AND THAT AND SHOVING ME LEFT AND RIGHT.

"AH! 'SCUSE ME. 'SCUSE ME. APOLOGIES." I WAS TRYING TO KEEP HOLD ON THE BOWLING-PIN CALLIGRAPHY WHILE ELBOWS WERE JUST BEING BUMPED ALL OVER. "'SCU—OW. 'SCU—GEE! 'SCUSE ME, 'SCUSE—SCUSE ME!" THIS WAS BECOMING ABSURD. "WHY IS EVERYONE—"

AND SUDDENLY I FOUND MYSELF FILLING WITH STRANGE FLUIDS AND I THOUGHT MY ASS WAS ABOUT TO RAPTURE BUT REALLY THE REALITY WAS THAT PEOPLE HAD MADE A CIRCLE AROUND—A WOMAN.

WELL—WELL SHE JUST STOOD THERE, HOLDING UP AN UMBRELLA THAT HAD SHARDS OF GLASS ALL OVER IT, AND EXTENDING FROM BELOW THE 'BRELLA WERE THESE LONG DARK BLUE SLEVELETS WHICH COVERED UP HER FOREARM-TO-FINGERTIP ON BOTH ARMS. THEY WERE LIKE SLEEVES THAT SHE'D ATTACHED TO THE UMBRELLA'S HANDLE. THEN SOMETHING UNMENTIONABLY BIZARRE HAPPENED.

I JUST FELT A WAVE OF ALL OF MY MEMORIES FROM THE PAST COUPLE YEARS JUST FUCKING WASH OVER AND UNDER MY BRAIN. I THOUGHT OF NEARLY GETTING ARRESTED BY THE BOLWING ALLEY IN OUR TOWN; I THOUGHT OF BEING TACKILY FUCKED ASSWISE BY CALEB'S DEARLY DEPARTED DOG; I THOUGHT OF CHATTING ON THAT SITE OMEGLE, WHERE YOU CHAT WITH ANONYMOUS STRANGERS WHO HAVE THE SAME INTERESTS AS YOU, AND TELLING SOME OMEGLE STRANGER ABOUT MY GRANDMA AND HOW'D SHE GIVEN ME A KEYCHAIN AND THEN TAUGHT ME THE PIN-CALLIGRAPHY I WAS DOING RIGHT NOW AT THIS VERY MOMENT, AND ALSO TELLING THE STRANGER HOW MUCH MY GRANDMA HAD BASICALLY MEANT; I THOUGHT OF WATCHING AIRPLANES; I THOUGHT OF BARRY; I THOUGHT OF GOING TO CALEB'S DOG FESTIVAL; AND I THOUGHT OF ORANGE PEELS AND COFFEE SHOPS AND PLANETARIUMS AND TALENT SHOWS AND IN ALL OF IT IT JUST SEEMED THAT THESE LAST TWO YEARS WERE PUSHING ME AND PRODDING THE END OF A SWORD INTO MY BACK AND GETTING ME TO WALK THE PLANK TO JUMP OVERBOARD INTO THIS PARTICULAR, EXPECTING MOMENT.

WELL I JUST KEPT STANDING THERE. I MEAN IT WAS DARK, AND NOT EXACTLY EASY TO SEE THIS WOMAN ESPECIALLY UNDER THE MERCIFUL 'BRELLA, BUT I COULD TELL THAT SHE WORE SOME KIND OF BLUE MASK WITH LONG BLACK STRIPES.

WELL I WAS SURE THIS WAS NO ONE I KNEW. SHE WAS TOO BEAUTIFUL.

“ᴇᴇɴɪᴇ. ᴇᴇɴɪᴇ. ᴇᴇ-ᴇᴇ-ᴇᴇɴɪᴇ.”

I TURNED. WHAT WAS THAT?

"ᴇᴇɴɪᴇ ᴇᴇɴɪᴇ ᴇᴇᴇᴇɴɪᴇ."

WHAT THE—

YET BEFORE I COULD INVESTIGATE I NOTICED THAT THE WOMAN WAS STILL STANDING THERE, SILENT, PLUS I REALIZED THAT THE REASON PEOPLE WERE GATHERED OVER AND AROUND HER WAS BECAUSE SHE WAS STANDING RIGHT UNDERNEATH THE GIANT MACHÉ MASK! AND NO ONE, IT BECAME CLEAR, WAS TELLING HER BECAUSE THEY WERE SO AMUSED AT WATCHING THE RAW BURGER MEAT DROOP ALL OVER HER UMBRELA OF SHARDS. WELL THIS IS SOMETHING THAT WOULD NORMALLY THRILL ME TO THE CORE BUT SOMEHOW, SOMEWHERE LYING WITHIN MY DEEP VENTRICLE, I GOT THIS INSTINCT THAT SHE WOULD NOT LIKE IT. I DON'T KNOW WHY.

I WAS STILL WORKING ON MY BOWLING-PIN CALLIGRAPHY WHEN I JUST TUCKED THE PIN UNDER MY RIGHT ARM, WHERE IT STUCK OUT WITH THE CALLIGRAPHY STILL SOMEWHAT NOTICEABLE, AND—I DON’T KNOW—I WALKED UP TO THIS WOMAN.

“ᴇᴇɴɪᴇ ᴇᴇɴɪᴇ ᴇᴇɴɪᴇ.”

WHAT THE FUCK I STILL HADN'T FIGURED OUT WHO WAS SAYING THAT, BUT SUDDENLY MY HEAD BUMPED INTO SOMETHING, AND IT WAS THE LITTLE UMBRELLA. I STOPPED, SWAYING A BIT IN THE DARKNESS AND LOOKING UPWARD. PEOPLE WERE STIFLING GIGGLES, CLEARLY WANTING THE MEAT-FEST TO GO UNABASHEDLY ON, BUT I TOOK IN A SILENT BREATH, AND REACHED OUT MY LEFT HAND TO GENTLY TOUCH THE WOMAN'S SHOULDER. SHE OF COURSE FLICKED HER HEAD AND CLENCHED HER MUSCLES FOR A SECOND, BUT THEN RELAXED AFTER LOOKING SLIGHTLY DOWNWARD AND TO HER LEFT, STILL ON ME.

CLEARLY I WASN'T SURE HOW THIS SHOULD UNANIMOUSLY PROCEED. I JUST STAMPED MY FOOT GENTLY FOR A SEC AND SORT OF PULLED HER AWAY BY THE ARM. SHE FOLLOWED, THOUGH WAS STILL LOOKING AT ME—AT LEAST I THINK. HER EYES WERE INDEFINITELY OBSCURED.

I SILENTLY BREATHED IN AGAIN, AND, ONE HAND STILL ON HER FOREARM, USED THE OTHER TO MAKE A POINTING KIND OF MOTION UP.

SHE LOOKED ABOVE, THEN TURNED BEHIND HER, COMING OUT OF MY GRASP IN THE PROCESS. WELL THE WOMAN'S BLUE MASK TITLED BACK AS SHE SAW THE HAMBURGER MEAT DRIPPING LAVISLHY ALL OVER THE GROUND, AND IT TOOK HER A SECOND BUT SUDDENLY SHE JUMPED A BIT UPON EXAMINING HER UMBRELLA. HER HEAD TURNED BACK TO ME, AND SHE POINTED TO THE 'BRELLA, THEN POINTED TO THE HAMBURGER FOUNTAIN, AND I NODDED, CONFIRMING THE WORST.

SHE LOOKED THEN HEAD ON AT ME. THEN SHE LOOKED AGAIN DOWN AND SLIGHTLY TO HER LEFT, STILL ON ME. THEN SHE LOOKED UP AGAIN, STEPPED FORWARD, PUT A HAND ON MY NECK AND KISSED ME.

“ᴇᴇɴɪᴇ-ᴇᴇɴɪᴇ-ᴇᴇɴɪᴇ-ᴇᴇɴɪᴇ-ᴇᴇᴇᴇᴇɴɪᴇᴇᴇ.”

THE BOWLING PIN JUST DROPPED FROM UNDER MY RIGHT ARM BUT ACTUALLY DIDN'T 'CAUSE I CAUGHT IT, AND BEFORE ANY KIND OF THOUGHT COULD FORM IN MY HEAD AT WHAT THE FUCK WAS HAPPENING, MY LIPS WERE YANKED BACKWARD, AWAY FROM HERS AND MY ENTIRE BODY JUST GOT PULLED BY A MASS OF ARMS, AND I REACHED OUT A HAND TOWARD THE WOMAN BUT BEFORE I KNEW IT SHE WAS SWALLOWED AGAIN UP IN THE SEA OF MASKS. "H-HEY!" I SAID, BUT WAS DROWNED OUT BY ALL THE GUYS PULLING ME CHANTING “EENIE-EENIE-EEEEEENIE, WE FOUND OUR LITTLE WEEEEENIE!” AND I WRESTED MYSELF JUST FREE AND DEMANDED TO KNOW WHAT IN THE FUCK WAS HAPPENING BEFORE THE GUYS EXPLAINED THEY WERE A LOCAL GANG CALLED THE EENIE BOYS WHO JUST LOVE TO RUIN ROMANTIC SCENES, WELL AS SOMEONE WHO CAN APPRECIATE A GREAT GANG I SAID THAT THAT WAS FINE AND DANDY, AND THAT I RESPECTED THEIR GLORIOUS OUTREACH ALTHOUGH AFTER THEY WALKED OFF I TURNED THIS WAY AND THAT, TRYING NOW TO FIND THE WOMAN AGAIN. "HEY! HEY!" I CONTINUED SEARCHING. "HEY—" AND I BUMPED INTO SOMEONE. "HELLO GREETINGS ARE YOU—"

"what?"

"OH." IT WAS JUST CALEB. "CALEB HAVE YOU SEEN A—"

"brother, can't talk now." HE BEGAN WALKING OFF. "i think i just found a woman who -- i mean, i think i'm in luh—" SUDDENLY HE STOPPED, LIKE HE WAS REMEMBERING SOMETHING ABOUT ME, AND HE CORRECTED HIMSELF. "i mean, i think i've found someone by whom i've been cursed."

"EXCUSE ME?" MY EYES GREW WIDE. "CALEB THIS IS HIGHLY DANGEROU—"

"no no, man." HE PATTED MY SHOULDER GENTLY. "i want to be cursed. i mean i've been, um—" HE SIGHED. "—‘cursed' before but it was by the wrong person. but this girl i saw here at the ball, she's cursed me and i like it."

"OH."

WELL ALL OF SUDDEN, I SOMEHOW JUST FELT LIKE I UNDERSTOOD.

"ALRIGHT SO WHERE IS SHE?” I SAID. “OUGHTN'T WE TO LOCATE HER BODY FOR YOUR PERUSING PLEASURE."

"i-i'll find her! you can meet up with me later, turns out i didn't need the detector after all! whoo!"

"O-OKAY. OH YES BUT CALEB LISTEN I THINK I MAY HAVE JUST HAD MY FIRST KI—"

"alright, more later dude!" AND HE WAS GONE.

WELL, I JUST SLUMPED UP AGAINST A WALL. AND I SLID DOWN TO JUST SIT ON THE FLOOR. IT WAS MY HEAD AND IT WAS JUST FUCKING REELING. HAD I JUST BEEN CURSED AS WELL? EVEN THOUGH IT DOESN'T REALLY MAKE SENSE, I GUESS I SUDDENLY BECAME—I FELT A TWINGE OF—GOD FUCK I DON'T KNOW—MAYBE GUILT? BECAUSE IT WASN'T PORRIDGE THAT WAS CURSING ME, IT WAS THIS WOMAN. BUT SHE DIDN'T SEEM LIKE ANY KIND OF WITCH.

THE LOUD MUSIC CONTINUED AND I JUST SAT THERE. HOW—HOW CAN I—

THE SONG SUDDENLY ENDED BEFORE THE MUSIC TRANSITIONED THEN INTO SOMETHING MUCH MORE CALM. A SERENE SORT OF ELECTRONICA CHILLBOY SONG. AND I CONTINUED SITTING THERE, SIMPLY STARING AT THE MASSES OF PEOPLE. WHILE THE SLOW, SOOTHING TUNE PLAYED, ALLOWING ME TO FIND SOME FOOTING, METAPHORICALLY OF COURSE, THOUGH EVENTUALLY ALSO LITERALLY AS I, VERY SLOWLY, PUT A HAND ON THE WALL BEHIND ME AND PRESSED MYSELF UPWARD, AS THE CALM MUSIC STILL DRONED ONWARD. AND AFTER A LONG TIME I WAS FINALLY ON MY FEET, AND IN THE CALM HYMNAL I WANDERED THISAWAY. OUTSTANDING LIGHTS SHINING THROUGH AS A THING WAS FAINTLY HEARD: “EENIE EENIE EEENIE” AND I JUST WONDERED WHAT EXACT ROMANTIC SCENE THE EENIE BOYS WERE READY TO DEVASTATE NEXT, BUT STILL HEARING THE GROWING EENIE-ING, I STRETCHED MY HAND OUTWARD TO OPEN UP A DOOR AND STEP OUT INTO THE COLD AIR. THE BOWLING PIN JUST SHOOK UNDER MY RIGHT ARM, AND I TURNED TO LOOK IN AT THE HUGE GLASS PANE WHERE THE ORANGE AND WHITE LIGHTS SPRANG INGLORIOUSLY AND I HEARD THE MUFFLED SLOW TUNE AND THE EENIE BOY CHANTS. WELL I LOOKED ABOUT, SAYING "MAYBE THIS WILL F-F-FINALLY FIX THE SHAKING—"

I STOPPED. WHAT.

I SAW. I—I SAW CALEB. AND I SAW THIS WOMAN. THE WOMAN IN BLUE. IN BLUE AND IN BLACK. BLACK STRIPES, AND I SAW CALEB PUTTING A HAND OVER HER. HER ARM.

"ᴇᴇɴɪᴇ ᴇᴇɴɪᴇ ᴇᴇɴɪᴇ."

AND I KEPT STARING. NO.

"ᴇᴇɴɪᴇ ᴇᴇɴɪᴇ ᴇᴇɴɪᴇ, ʜᴇʀᴇ ᴄᴏᴍᴇs ᴏᴜʀ ᴡᴇᴇɴɪᴇ."

CALEB WAS LEANING FORWARD. CALEB, RESTING AN ARM ON HER WAIST. AND CALEB PRESSING HIS LIPS ON HERS.

"WHAT THE—!!"

“ᴇᴇɴɪᴇ-ᴇᴇɴɪᴇ-ᴇᴇɴɪᴇ, ᴛɪᴍᴇ ғᴏʀ ᴛʜᴇ ʙᴇᴀɴɪᴇ!”

"C—C—”

“ᴇᴇɴɪᴇ-ᴇᴇɴɪᴇ!”

CALEB, PUTTING A HAND OVER HER MASK. CALEB, TAKING IT OFF SLOWLY. ME, DROPPING THE PIN IN THE SNOW AND GASPING INTENSELY WHEN I SEE THE EXTREMELY FAMILIAR EYES LOOK AT HIM SWEETLY.

"ᴇᴇɴɪᴇ-ᴇᴇɴɪᴇ-ᴇᴇɴɪᴇ-ᴇᴇɴɪᴇ-ᴇᴇɴɪᴇ-ᴇᴇɴɪᴇ-ᴇᴇᴇᴇᴇᴇɴɪᴇᴇᴇᴇᴇᴇᴇᴇᴇᴇᴇᴇᴇ!!!!"

EENIE BOYS SWARM IN AS CALEB LOOKS AT THE FACE IN FRONT OF HIM AND HE RIPS OFF HIS AVIATORS AND SUDDENLY HIS EYES WIDEN AND HE STEPS BACK HORRIFIED, RECOGNIZING THE FACE OF THE INFAMOUS WITCH ONLY ONE MOMENT AFTER I DO. AND I SUDDENLY GET A BETTER LOOK OVER AT THE GLASS SHARDS ON HER UMBRELLA, AND SEE THAT THEY'RE THICK, AND CURVED. LIKE SHARDS OF A BOTTLE. HOW THE FUCK COULD I BE SO INDOLENTLY STUPID. OF FUCKING COURSE IT WAS—

“ᴇᴇɴɪᴇᴇᴇᴇᴇᴇᴇᴇ!” THE EENIE BOYS GRAB CALEB AS HIS HEAD TURNS TO SUDDENLY SEE ME, HIS EYES SHOCKED AND WIDE AND LOOKING INTO MINE, AND HIM MOUTHING A "P" SOUND BEFORE HE GETS PULLED BACK.

“ᴇᴇEEEEEɴɪᴇ!” 

WELL GREAT.

GREAT. AT LEAST I HAVE NO REASON TO FEEL GUILT, RIGHT? HA, ISN'T THAT GREAT? NO REASON TO FEEL GUILT 'CAUSE IT'S THE SAME PERSON, ISN'T IT? PORRIDGE WAS THE UMBRELLA-WOMAN ALL ALONG. AND THIS IS SOMETHING THAT COULD ONLY REALLY LEAD TO ME FEELING PERFECLTY UPSTANDING AND GREAT AND REACTING LIKE SOMEONE WHO FEELS UTTERLY FANTASTIC, JUST COMPLETELY AND UTTERLY WONDERFUL.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!" I SCREAMED BEFORE JUST RUNNING. BOWLING PIN LEFT AS IT'S LEFT BEHIND IN THE SNOWBANK.

"s-seth!"

ALRIGHT REALLY SO IT WAS MY UNDERSTANDING THAT CALEB HAS BEEN FINE, AND HE'S ALRIGHT, AND NOTHING'S BAD AND EVERYTHING'S GREAT SETH IS GREAT CALEB IS AWESOME AND MY BROTHER IS GREAT, AND THE DOG WAS GREAT, AND YOU KNOW WHAT I'M BEGINNING TO THINK CALEB WAS ACTUALLY FEELING A BURST OF INCREDIBLE ANGER WITHIN HIM EARLIER TONIGHT WHEN HE STOOD BEFORE THAT ICY HILL AND FUCKING HOWLED BECAUSE YOU KNOW WHAT EXACTLY THAT SORT OF FEELING WAS RUNNING UP THROUGH MY SOUL AS I JUST STOPPED AND FELL OVER BEFORE THE SAME ICE-COVERED HILL AND JUST FUCKING SCREAMED.

[sublimazion3]

You such great person to translate from other when they ask you to translate,but you know in ANN Radio,myao,shimada and chiyori write letter for kojiharu too,can u translate that?And then when there is mc with sashi,jurina,kitarie,yuki and michan they talked about memory with kojiharu. if you don't mind please translate for kojiharu oshi...

Myao’s: “Dear Kojima Haruna,

I never thought it would come the day in which I’d have written a letter to you. First of all, thank you very much for letting me attending this All Night Nippon broadcast with you, being it your last one. I was sure that, for your last broadcast here, you would’ve gathered with all others very popular, up in SSK rankings members, and that my letter would’ve just gotten sent to you; yet, here I am, a not so popular member who doesn’t even know if she’ll make it in SSK this year, chosen by you to attend tonights bradcast. You really are a goddess, after all. You know, among the members we’re really asking ourselves if you aren’t a goddess for real, lately. You’re usually told that you’re beautiful, both in the inside and outside, but it’s actually the truth. 

About 9 years ago, when I took the audition for AKB, I remember I was asked from one of the judges there if there was any member within AKB that I looked up to. And I immediately replied, “It’s Kojima Haruna-san!”. The reason is that I didn’t know any other member’s name aside from yours. Minegishi-san, please forgive me. - Minegishi: “I don’t know what to do with your apologies!” - However, here I am today, thanks to that reply of mine. I can’t stop peeing my pants thinking about what would’ve happened if I had given another members’ name that day, instead of yours. Kojima-san, thank you for guiding me on my journey in AKB48. Even if you graduate, we, Kojima-children, will keep living on. Shall you go through any hard times, please do not hesitate to rely on us, your Kojima-children. I will always support you. Thank you for your hard work for the past 11 years. Miyazaki Miho.”

Shimada’s:“To Kojima-san. 

This is my first time writing a letter to you. When I joined the group, as a kenyuusei member, I had many chances of connection with Kojima-san. We’d shoot together for hours for AKB akiyoshi, go to locations together, and I’d always dance as under during A5th’s Renai Kinshi Jourei stages. When I got the DVDs of those theater stages, I realized I was constantly following you around. Yes, it was because I was your under, and there were many mistakes I kept makind and such, but I realized you were showing me the right way of appearing on stage and how to properly behave. For the Heart Gata Virus performance, I wasn’t able to properly say your line in the middle of the song, so in order to do that I’d watch you performing that song many times, listening to that carefully. We’ve never been in the same team, or had the chance to work that much together, that’s why, it made me happy when I was able to do things such as helping you changing quickly of your costume the other day at Music Station, or when you chose me to appear in the theater stage with you. I thought our chances of being together were slowly increasing, and it made me happy the most the fact that I could talk to you just a little bit. Oh, and it also made me happy that you praised my outfit. So I’m totally gonna do my best as new generation’s fashionista, so please support me. P.S. - do you think you can finally follow me back on twitter? By Shimada Haruka.”I found this cut video with Myao’s and Shimada’s letters, but there’s no letter written from Chiyori, you sure she read one? If she did then just send me the link of the whole ANN broadcast and the minute where she starts reading it, it will help me saving some time, you know. 

From the CM, if I remember correctly;Minegishi says that she’s got many memories with Kojima, but the one that maybe is the most impressed in her mind is of when they had shootings together and when they went back to the dressing room Kojima offered to go buying Minegishi some crepes because she knew she liked them. The thing by itself is already kind and caring enough, the thing is that when she came back, the crepe she handed to Minegishi was a 1,800￥ crepe and it had truffle in the inside. Other members make fun of her ‘cause it looks like Minegishi gets the most impressed when people give her very expensive stuff lol Sashihara doesn’t really share any memory she has with Kojima, she instead praises her ‘cause she says that if otakus like her were to watch that Sexy Show thing she brought on stage few performances earlier, they prolly wouldn’t have felt excited at all, but because that sexy show was both sexy and cute and just nice to watch, she realized how fans in the audience were all excited and happy about it and welcomed it good, so she praises Kojima’s setlist choice, I guess. And inventive. 

Kitarie says that she hasn’t had many occasions to be with Kojima, however she remembers of when they both got in the same group when they had shootings for Love Trip and members/group of members went to high school guys and girls and assisted them in their love confessions; however she says that hers and Kojima’s group was the only one that got rejected. Like the guy or the girl who made the confession got rejected while all other members’ groups were all successful. 

Jurina brings back memories from oogoe diamond saying that on that time she was able to make friends with many senpais who eventually she felt like older sisters, and that the thing went on even years after, since lately she found Kojima-san laying on her shoulder saying that she was sleepy, but then retracting saying that Jurina is too skinny. I can’t really get what she says after that ‘cause there’s Sashihara talking on her, but I think that she says that she’s gonna become more “musuclar” so that Kojima won’t feel the “bones under her skin”. 

Eventually there’s Yuki who, as everyone expected, doesn’t have many memories with Kojima (LMAO at Sashihara who is like “why the fuck you and Mayu never have memories or good stuff to share with others about other members?!”), but she says she’s gonna do her best tonight since it’s her graduation concert, and that she’s gonna try to get close to her this much↓

However, everyone else is like, “no - the fuck - that’s scary - you’ll freak her out” etc., so Sashihara says that the only thing to do is for her to hug Kojima from behind, this way↓

but Kitarie is like “Sashi, what the fuck, that is scary too. What’s that, a prowrestling move?!” - Sashihara laughs her ass off at her own suggestion, whereas Kitarie is like “(to Yuki) if you’re gonna do that, don’t hold her too tight or you’re gonna strangle her”. Yuki says she got it and that she’s gonna try her best. 

The whole MC with Yuki is way more funny, though, ‘cause before all of this there’s like Yuki saying that when she and Kojima were announced as WCenter of green flash, they both looked at each other and were like, “that’s good, we’re prolly gonna have more chances of becoming colose, now. More chances of talking”, but then she’s like, “and yet, it’s been nearly two years, and absolutely nothing has changed”. Then Minegishi is like, “I know, I’ve been actually asked by fans to make you two become friends. Like fans have actually come to meet me and asked me to make sure that you two get close” and Sashihara is like, “Who the fuck is that? What kind of fan is that? You guys stop doing that!” and Minegishi is like: “But it’s honestly her (Yuki’s) own fault, ‘cause yesterday, when everyone was performing 10nen Zakura, and Nyan-nyan was in the middle and everyone was crying for the emotion, I went to her (Yuki) and was like, “Yuki, now it’s the time, you can go, just go!” and she!? She rejected me!! She was like “no–I—I really can’t. I really really can’t”. The fuck was that!?” It’s honestly so funny, I love it to death. Especially if you look at the way they talk and their expressions and all, LOL. 

Anyways, here you go, I guess. 

[winterbuckytho]

WHFJ 7 Thy Body In Remembrance of You pt.12 Jim & Caleb II

They walked in and Jim searched Caleb for any weapons. In his jacket he discovered an manila packet folded in half with his name in very familiar writing.

"Who gave you this?" Jim asked shucking out of his boots and coat, leaving them in the hall on the floor.

"The same person who tasked me to keep an eye on you. Fury."

Jim hands it back and says "Oh, really? Open it. If it explodes, I don't want a face full." He's kinda being mean, but he doubts Caleb would be running around with a bomb in his pocket unknowingly. He wanted to yell or argue but he knew it would lead nowhere and that this was just a symptom of what had gone wrong. He was intensely hurt by the idea Caleb had been getting close for forget nefarious, professional reasons. His mind harkened back to the time they shared in his kitchen. He felt an almost begrudging pulse of lust for Caleb. Then the image of a pile of worms swimming in slime against each other. The slime reminded him of cum, the kind that comes from a well pleased woman. 'Jesus, fucking fuck. God, what is wrong with me?' he cried in the silence of his own mind.

Caleb unwinds the string keeping it shut and takes out first a photograph, a letter, and a card. Handing each to Jim one by one.

The photo is of Nickelle Fury, a sever woman with an eye patch over her left eye with Agent Pollock Carter, the guy who Steve knew that helped Jim get out of Hydra. In the photo they are shaking hands and each holding one side of the packet. In the background Jim could see a bit of a calender behind them. This photo was taken the same month, a year after he got out. They've had this down as a possible eventuality. May very well have trained Caleb since he was a small child to deal with Jim. He can think of no other way they could have hoped to bring him down or in should the need arise. Thank god he is not as far gone as they seemed to think he could go. At least he can understand what is happening.

He kinda knows what the letter will say. he is a bout to speak when Caleb speak first.

"Project White Winged Dove. It wasn't just for you, but I was. I was never surprised you don't remember me. They had a hard time trying to find an adult who could content with you and so began scrubbing for enhanced people who, even if they were still minors, could be trained in the event the Winter Soldier reform ever derails. You yourself taught me everything I know.

I'm gonna tell you all the truth I can right now and forever because... I need you to know I would never hurt you. I really care about you.

I am telepathic and telekinetic. I use telepathic illusion to shape your perception of how you feel the contact I make with you and telekinesis to make said contact. The other way I work, I can take control of other living things like people or animals, right down to their cells. I could give you cancer or another arm, make you blond or eat a crepe if I wanted to. And I could watch you do it from anywhere, we think as long as I have met you in person or be in your body, doing it myself. I can't seem to fix my disorder with it, so that's a bummer.

I have been using non humans who live in the town proper to keep an eye out for you or anyone trying to get to you. We can't risk you being controlled again. And..." He says a bit more meekly "if you don't mind me saying, you've worked too hard for it all to come crashing down. But anyway, animals, the smaller the better; humans not so much. Too much power leak, I can't keep it all in one place for very long. And the more I use, the more robust it becomes. Like a gas tank that when nearing empty just grows bigger and somehow the liquid inside grows in volume to fit thr proportions.

We really don't understand what my limits are yet.

Beings I control all vary in degrees, distances, and lengths of time. During that time I can not move my own physical body. During times of immobilization, I can project what is called an astral form, either a copy of one or more of my own body or multiple limbs of different types that can go unseen and interact with the physical things the way my physical body does. I am not to use this ability for combat. I meant it when I said I can hardly move anything thicker than syrup. I take medications to dampen it down, it works like a psionic muscle relaxant. Otherwise I'd lose control while sleeping.

I am well disciplined in telepathic cloaking, detection, communication and mnemokinesis, specifically detecting changes to memories and removing thoughts and memories. Just to be clear, no, I have never removed yours. " He explained quite formally, fussing with a string on the cuff of his left sleeve.

"Okay, that is way more than I thought you'd say. Wow. What a mouthful. If you are telling me the truth, I apprieciate it and can understand how I have been alarming you. I know I've been acting like I've lost my mind, I can explain that." he makes a gesture with his hands first the right pointing over his left shoulder then left pointing over his right followed by a shake of his shaggy damp hair before gesturing behind himself once more this time with both hands closed with thumbs extended as if he is trying to explain geographic directions incorrectly.

"Well, some of that." Jim sighs, placing his open hands in the air at chest height pushing down gently twice as he does so before continuing, "Where ever we go from here, I just have one request. If you are asked to watch me, don't do it in secret anymore. Call me, visit me, make me talk. I now understand none of this, well this part of it, would have never happened if I had trusted my friends and asked for help. I'm not used to having help or solving problems with out breaking something. But I know I have to change, I have to learn to do things differently. I can hardly look at you, for a moment you were in serious danger because I'm a fucking lunatic who doesn't know how to just be normal. I have to learn I am not alone anymore and I have to care for my friends better than I have been." Jim says.

Caleb, God bless his soul, only blinks twice in baffelment at Jim's change in mood then nods seemingly to himself now reassured Jim is going to kill him.

"Listen, I've been having some... odd experiences. I have also been experiencing some psychological problems. What you just said explains some of it but, I'm still... going through something. I think I am either going insane in a totally new way than usual, have encountered a local enhanced child in multiple places around town including my own bedroom, or am at the center of a haunting, mostly by someone I killed... when I was...was...the Winter Soldier." those last two words come out of his mouth with a shudder in the tone of a child who knows the boogeyman is real. And unfortunately, a quite unhinged laugh tore free from him as soon as this statement was out of his mouth. "I'm pretty sure it's a haunting now though. I'm very sure such things are real. I'd tell you all about it, but you might want to sleep tonight, ha."

"Under other circumstances with someone besides you, I'd have assumed you have lost touch with reality and would keep you restrained till I update with my contact. I have seen you doing some questionable things over the last few months. I mean, take the day I lead you home from the store." Seeing the look on Jim's face Caleb continued, "I was two of them. I chose the bird to check your breathing, pulse and dilation of your pupils. The rabbit was because I wasn't sure if you could see properly. From my point of view you walked up the street, became startled and upset, then rushed to an empty spot on the sidewalk then ask a squirrel who his friend was. It was rather bizarre."

"I wasn't... So you weren't...the squirrel was just..."Jim begins to ask with a slightly deflated air.

"No. But I was here the other day. I'll entirely be honest. I'm not lying about how I feel about you. And I know it's wrong... I just missed you so much and you didn't want m-me to get any closer. But I keep wanting you. So I came to see you and uhm I saw... i i-in the bath..." Caleb blushing deeply biting the corner of his lower lip, goes on, " When you were...busy I began hearing the voice you also heard. I actually went downstairs in a spider long before you did and took note of the temperature change and mood there. I thought things like that didn't really happen but I've had some experiences in Jansenhaven that support the possibility."

"What kind of experiences? Oh, but- you heard that? The crying?" Jim asked unabashedly comforted that someone else experienced it as well.

"Yes, Jim. It incapacitated you for a while. I tried to get your attention but you couldn't hear I guess. I didn't use telepathy because I didn't want to invade you again, I know you didn't like that very much when it was telekinetic. I got hold of a racoon and was gonna break in and at the very least dial 911 for you. As for my experience, we can talk abut that stuff later if you want, right now would you mind if took an assessment of your physical and mental state?"

"I guess I have to, huh?"

"Yes. I need to know what to tell my mom."

"Your what now?"

"I'll explain later. Let's get some drinks and sit. This will only take a bit."

After retrieving two glasses of water Jim returned seeing Caleb had seated himself on the floor at the coffee table. Jim did the same.

"Do you think you can tell me about the two things in your life that worry you the most?" Caleb asks as soon as Jim has made himself comfortable.

With a stricken look Jim reaches up pushing his hair back the gripping it with both hands as if he is going to pull it out. He blinks and when his eyes open again they are wide as if he is trying to see everything that is a problem.

"Take a breath Jim. Tell me what you feel most strongly at the moment. " Caleb asks gently.

Jim closes his eyes letting go of his softly waved dark brown hair. He takes a breath and says "Pain. I am in pain. " almost instantly.

"Will you let me use telekinesis to help?"

Jim nods.

A hand tests on his shoulder a moment then sinks beneath his skin he can feel another on the back of his neck doing the same.

As Caleb works, Jim asks "You said I've met you before? Really? Can you tell me... am I why you..." without meaning to but also understanding Caleb can hear '...feel the way you do? Did...did I do something, say something that took advantage of you during that time? Did I prey upon you and make you think you like it?'

With a smile Caleb answers him. "Uht uhn. No. You were kind and good, always. I remember you were very sad though you tried not to show it and very confused about what was going to happen next. You wore long sleeve turtle necks and gloves when you were with me. We only worked together for about six months. You taught me my enhancements have a use and it made me really happy. You taught me how to fight with a knife, use a pistol and how to read other people without getting in their minds. You taught me how to be comfortable and love my body by teaching me how to dance. All so I could confidently go toe to toe with you if ever I needed to. I only started having those feelings when I started my new route at work. Before then I considered myself your guardian angel and nothing more."

"I'm sorry I can't remember. I'm sorry you had to do it, but I'm glad you learned well." 'I'm glad I wasn't that kind of monster also.'

"You are not a monster. You are not a bad person. You have had a hell of a life and still you try so hard to be a version of yourself you can feel proud of. You are my hero for not saying 'I'm messed up so I'm gonna do messed up things. It's not my fault if others get hurt, someone hurt me.' And I don't xare what you say, I love you. Not you in some other time and place, you now. Sick, tierd, troubled, whatever you are, how ever you are, now."

The sensation of the hands temperature is similar to that perfect level of warm you get when you turn on both hot and cold water from a single faucet. It will seem your mind can not decide whether it is more on the side of hot or more cold. The hands glide down into his body causing no pain but leaving a trail of blessedly cool numb behind on everything they touch. The hand on his shoulder walks it's fingers over the muscle and tendons along his left side while the other does the same down his spine then back up the muscles and the tissue connected to the hardware. A third hand comes to set at his temple the thumb resting over the markings of the blue girl. With a sensation of incredible depth the hand pressed forward on a diagnal toward the back of his skull. The blaring pain began to lessen significantly. After months Jim breathed a sigh of relief.

"Is this better?"

"Yes. The marks...they still hurt a bit. They weren't a physical injury I don't think. The pain from them was changing how I think, I was starting to be unable to make sense of some pretty simple concepts."

"I'm glad I could -oh no... " muttered Caleb.

Caleb's body waivers, he reaches clumsily forward knocking over several things. He grasps the cup of water and drags it toward himself as if it weights 20 pounds. With it finally closer breathing heavily "...I overdid it. Earlier I was just so scared..." he mutters. Out of his pocket he takes a pill case and begins trying to open it

His hands shake as he tries to take one pill out he spills several onto the table. his shoulders slump now and there's a weird feeling in the air like static electricity. Jim can see some of the pages on a book on the table beginning to lift some of the pills rolling around even though Caleb's not pushing them with his fingers his hair is starting to fluff about him as if there is a wind in the room with them. He throws a pill in his mouth and knocks back a sip of water he appears to be growing weaker, his posture is starting to slouch like he is going entirely limp.

He passes out, falling backward between the couch and the coffee table. There is a low buzzing that has been sub-audible for a few minutes now but is growing into a rapid drumming. Jim turns around and looks behind himself at the source of the noise. The lamp is sliding around on the side table and the table is trembling like someone is trying to lift it strait up with one hand and is losing balance. Jim feels several random tugs on his sleeves and hair, even felt some thing the size of a softball pushing back his right shoulder. As he sits he notices a growing rumbling which seems to be caused by everything in the room he's in being to be manipulated by unseen forces. The painting above the fireplace, the clock beside the window, the couch, the chair. It grows louder and louder until Jim is sure everything in the little house is rattling on their shelfs & tables, hell, he can hear the silverware clanging around inside the drawer and the cupboard doors quickly fluttering against their frames. He can hear water splashing upstairs and knows what he'd see if he went up and looked in the toilet: water sloshing about as if being carried none too carefully in a pail. Then as slowly as it began it winds down again then stops entirely.

He turns back and look at Caleb. Well, he wasn't lying about his control, he is indeed clumsy with the powder keg in his head, he does have trouble moving anything thicker than syrup. It'd be hard for Jim to use his arm while asleep or losing control of it, too. The boy's (for in Jim's mind, Caleb is too young for this shit) face is very troubled. His long eyelashes lay very prettily against his cheek, his skin still rosey from the wind outside. His lips are in a little pout and his brow is furrowed. Jim wonders if he's having a nightmare or is aware somehow of what is going on outside himself? Did the pill knock him out or did it immobilize his kinetic energy keeping him from letting loose a tornado of kinetic power in Jim's house? He could kill him and pick up stakes and run, but if Agent Carter is on the level, Jim just needs a therapist and maybe an exorcist. . Feeling bone tired he gets to his feet and gets Caleb off the floor. He is light in Jim's arms; his head flops back over Jim's right arm. There is a fine fuzz on his cheek that Jim just wants to rub his face in.

Jim is so angry, so confused and so in love, the breach of trust feels like it's killing him. The paranoia doesn't usually go this far. He just had to keep digging. But now is so disappointed that his suspicions turned out correct this time. He wants the knowledge to go away just so he doesn't have to feel the hurt anymore.

He's never fallen for a target before but has seen it happen, he can remember that all it lead to was pain for the two involved. It is the first thing Jim remembers about becoming lucid, watching confused as a man's heart was crushed before his eyes. He can remember the deceptive party lost his edge entirely and for months tried to live with the burning shame & absolutely undying desire washing away all reason. He saw the panic then final resolve in his eye when the deceptive one decided to come clean. His love was killed and he was deemed weak but before they could dispose of him the guy went mad with grief, Gustovovich killed himself.

He feels like if Caleb were playing him and there is no doubt Caleb could, Jim knows what kind of training spies worth their salt go through, Jim thinks he would see something further in passed the real guilt, a kind of trail of tells leading back to the truth that guilt is being redirected from.

He doesn't want this for Caleb, he doesn't want this kind of life to crush this boy's heart & soul. Even though he realizes as young as he is, Caleb is no boy. He can see five different ways Caleb can get hurt. Even as a minor he must have had to grow up so fast. Jim feels a feeling like petrifying terror when he thinks about Caleb living mentally as an adult to survive the world of enhanced politics and covert operations. Has he ever had to kill anyone? How many corpses has he seen? Has he ever been interrogated and tortured? Jim can only think of awful things that could happen to a child caught in the grinding teeth of political, economic or organized criminal espionage.

He rests Caleb on the couch laying him on his right side, and even though he is physically and mentally drained he can't leave Caleb's side. He sits on the floor beside the couch resting his right arm on the cushion and his head upon it. He can look directly into Caleb's face this way. He hopes Caleb can feel him there. He tentatively raises his metal hand. He wants Caleb to wake up and know he doesn't have to be afraid, doesn't have to fight or protect himself. Jim brushes Caleb's hair back caressing him softly so as not to wake him. He dozes gently if uncomfortably and wakes when he hears forlorn quiet sobs & sniffles beside him. They have a lot to talk about but being apart from each other is not one of them.

[archive-of-fics]

Dreams - Armin Arlert

Armin stares into your eyes, your beautiful (e/c) eyes. Oh how he loved those eyes, they were so soft and gentle. He leaned down and started covering your neck in kisses, undoing the first two buttons of your shirt to get at your collar bones and shoulders.

He leaned back and sat on your hips, rocking ever so slightly causing you to moan quietly. You were so beautiful, your face was hot a flustered, your neck and shoulders were covered in Armin’s marks. Armin started to undo your shirt as he rocked. “You’re so beautiful (Name)” he said softly “I love you. You’re so beautiful and perfect and sexy, oh the things I would do to you...” All of a sudden laughter filled the air and Armin was forced out of his dream and back to reality.

He shot up quickly to find a group of boys around his bed, laughing their heads off. It only took Armin a second to realize what had happened and when he did he felt his cheeks become very hot. He’d been talking in his sleep again. “Ohhhhhh (Name). You’re so beautiful.” Connie teased between laughs “Oh (Name)” Jean said mimicking Armin’s voice “You’re so sexy and hot, I’d love to be with you forever.” Reiner joined in as well, leaning against Bertholdt so he didn’t fall over from laughter. Bertholdt just stood there and rolled his eyes. “Oh (Name)” Reiner said, tears now forming in his eyes “How I would love to fuck you senseless.” “Feel my long hard wrath bitch!” Eren said in a half shout causing everyone to laugh harder, tears streaming from their eyes. Even Bertholdt couldn’t hold it in anymore as he burst out in a fit of giggles causing Reiner to fall over. Armin could feel his eyes start to water as he tried very hard not to cry. Marco noticed this and gentle rubbed Armin’s arm.

“Hey we’re only joking; we don’t mean to upset you. It’s just we never thought you of all people had dreams like that, especially about someone we all know so well.” Armin glared slightly.

“Oh course I have dreams like that, everyone does. Not having sexual dreams at our age is far weirder than having them.” This statement just caused everyone to laugh harder.

“Wow Armin, I never knew you were that type of guy. I had you seriously misjudged” Reiner said from his position on the floor, still giggling. Once everything calmed down Eren sat down on the bed next to Armin and nudged his shoulder.

 “Don’t worry buddy were gonna help you get her, right guys!” Jean just looked at Eren “I don’t remember agree...” he began but Marco cut him off. “Of course we are!” Reiner nodded in agreement.

“Hell yeah!” he said “We can’t leave them dreams unfulfilled now can we!” Everyone started snickering again but Armin just rolled his eyes. “What have I let myself in for?” He thought to himself. “Hey! (Name)!” Came a voice from behind you and you turn to see Sasha running towards you. You stop and wait for her to catch up.

 “What’s up Sasha?” You ask curiously, tilting your head to the side slightly as the taller girl finds her way to your side.

“Nothing much really, I just thought we could eat together again” she says smiling at you. You groan silently, ever since you had let Sasha have half your bread and soup she started following you around like a lost puppy, requesting to sit next to you during every meal. You let a sigh escape your lips, knowing that you couldn’t eat it all anyway.

 “Sure” you say “it’s nice to have someone to sit next to.” Sasha grins and grabs your arm pulling you quickly to the dining hall for breakfast.

 “Let’s go then or there will be nothing left!” You almost fall due to the sudden force pulling you along.

“Wait Sasha I don’t think were gonna miss anything we’re ten minutes early!” Sasha just grinned, drooling slightly. “Better safe than sorry!” You and Sasha had sat down at your table, eating and talking and laughing at jokes that you were exchanging. Sasha was actually good company, she was fun to talk with and didn’t cause trouble in the dining hall like other people you knew (Eren and Jean).

Sasha started talking to you about gears when you heard the bench creak. You look up to see three boys had sat opposite you: Eren on the left with a look of purpose in his eyes, Armin in the middle looking very uncomfortable about something and Reiner on the right looking smug.

You notice that the other boys are all scattered around the dining hall trying to look casual, however you notice their eyes keep flicking in your direction and you know there is something going on.   “Hey guys” you say cautiously “what’s up?” Reiner smiles mischievously at you and you instantly regret opening your mouth.

 “Nothing much, nothing much” he says “I was just wondering, you have any good dreams last night?” You eye him carefully

“Yeah I guess, I dream most nights actually.” You notice Armin sink further into his seat at the mention of dreams and you know this is somehow related to him. You grip your spoon tightly ‘What are they doing to you Armin?’ you think to yourself ‘you look terrified you poor thing.’

Suddenly a wave of protectiveness comes over you as you feel the need to protect the smaller boy who had also been your crush since you first met him. He had been sweet and kind and funny and you couldn’t help but fall in love with him.

Now the thought of the other guys doing something to hurt him made you angry and you decided you had to get him out of this situation.

“Why do you ask?” you say directing your question at Reiner but keeping a close eye on Armin.

“No reason, it’s just I was wondering what kind of things you dream about. I was thinking you dreamed about stuff like, oh I don’t know, romance and love and those kinds of things. Do you dream about anyone in particular?” You put your full gaze on Reiner now looking directly into his eyes.

 “Yes I actually dreamt about you last night” you say in a dry tone. “I dreamt I punched you in the face 47 times, it was very romantic and full of love.” Reiner just stared at you while Eren looked confused.

“That doesn’t sound romantic, it sounds violent!” Armin sighed and spoke for the first time his voice making your heart melt.

 “I think she was being sarcastic Eren.” As if Armin’s voice woke Reiner from his trance he smiled and leaned in towards the blond.

 “So what did you dream of last night then Armin?” Snickers could be heard throughout the dining hall and that was when you lost it. “Leave Armin alone! Whatever you’re doing is clearly upsetting him so why don’t you back off!” You get up angrily and walk around the table pulling Armin up off the bench, leading him away from the dining hall.

Once you find an empty room you throw him in and shut the door behind you. You turn around to see Armin standing there shaking a little, you cross your arms and sigh. “What was that all about?” you ask. Armin just stands there and you sigh again.

“Listen, if you tell me then I can go kick there arses, it will be fun we can take it in turns! I’ll knock Reiner to the floor and punch him to keep him down then you can hit him, it will be just like a game!” Armin smiles briefly before it fades again. He pauses, as if thinking of what he’s going to say before he decides to let it out.

“I like you” he says nervously. “No I love you, and I-I had a dream about you last night... and yesterday... and last week. However this time I talked in my sleep and they found out about my crush s-so...” his voice trailed off and you stare at him. He looks away awkwardly.

“I understand if you feel creped out and stuff I couldn’t-”. He is stopped when you suddenly lean forward and kiss him. He just looks shocked for a moment but softens into the kiss. Once you pull away you look him in his beautiful blue eyes.

 “Don’t worry about it I’ve had dreams about you too, it’s perfectly normal to dream about someone you like.” His eyes widen at your words as he realizes what you are suggesting.

“Anyway” you say a smile forming on your lips “How about we make one of them dream a reality?”