#and anakin is like it's probably the same place it was when satine lived here in this house with you

[tennessoui]

I feel like this is a big ask, but 1. welcome back! 2. can you ever see KUWSK going angsty? Not permanently or anything, but what would a KUWSK obikin disagreement look like?

yes thank you for welcoming me back a month and a half ago i'm a bit trash to be so late on this but!! here is about 2k of a more serious fight between anakin and obi-wan.

(2k)

“You’re talking to your ex,” Anakin says. It’s the tone of voice he uses on work calls when he’s absolutely furious but trying to remain professional. Obi-Wan has never heard it directed at him before. He almost doesn’t recognize it. 

“Casually,” he stresses. “We’re…casually speaking.”

“Casually,” Anakin echoes in that same voice. Obi-Wan is starting to think he’s done something incredibly wrong. 

“She messaged me,” he stresses, feeling as if this is an important fact. “I didn’t reach out to her.”

“But you reached back!” Anakin says loudly, putting the spoon on its rest a touch too forcefully. “And then you didn’t even tell me!”

“I thought it was a non-issue!” Obi-Wan protests. “I don’t tell you when I talk to the woman at the supermarket checkout line!”

“Keep Francesca out of this,” Anakin cuts through the air with the side of his hand as he spins around to open their spice cabinet. “You know full well that’s different.”

“She flirts with me at the store, and you’re fine with it!” Obi-Wan quite completely feels like tearing out his hair. He can’t believe they’re having this conversation. He can’t believe his own fortune, that he’d pulled up a picture mid-playful argument with Anakin over what the twins had dressed as for Halloween when they were five, and he’d shown it to his partner at the exact moment that Satine ex-Kenobi had texted him, replying to something he'd sent a week ago.

That had pretty much ended the playful part of their argument.

“Yeah, and it’s not the fucking same, Obi-Wan,” Anakin responds, shaking a bit of salt aggressively into the stew. “You were never fucking married to fucking Francesca.”

“Anakin—”

“And by the way,” Anakin snaps, trading the salt for cayenne pepper and seasoning it liberally. “Implying that your ex-wife is also flirting with you over texts you did not tell me about is not the best strategy, Professor.”

The worst part is that he’s not even looking at him anymore, scowling instead into the contents of the heavy pot.

“Anakin,” Obi-Wan tries, because he’s not listening, he’s just reacting. Of course Obi-Wan knows Francesca and Satine aren’t really the same thing, but they mean the same thing to him. One slips him free red bell peppers sometimes by ringing them up as green ones with a wink and a quirk of her lips. The other is his ex-wife.

But neither of them is Anakin, and so they mean the same thing to him. He doesn’t love them. He can’t even pay them the slightest modicum of his attention, because he’s too wrapped up in and around and going crazy over this man who’s petty enough to have absolutely just ruined Obi-Wan’s dinner on purpose by adding too much spice to the stew Obi-Wan had requested.

“Anakin, I think we need to take a step back from this,” he finally gets out when his partner is distracted by opening and closing the cabinet doors, ostensibly looking for the bowls even though he’d been the one to reorganize the dishes in the first place, years ago, and he’s never not known where something is.

“I think I’m going to sleep in my room tonight,” Anakin replies in an icy voice. “I think you might be right.”

“What? Darling, no—Anakin, love, it’s—casual cannot even come close to describing the texts, you can read them if you want, there’s nothing there—“

“Daddy? Obi?” Luke asks from the kitchen doorway. He’s peering around it, little face looking horrified. Obi-Wan freezes. How loud had they been? Luke and Leia are seven now, they remember these things, they have questions—“Is dinner ready? Obi?”

Leia’s face joins the same pale ghost of her brother’s, and Obi-Wan feels awful. Absolutely terrible, but the sort of terrible he doesn’t know what to do with. The twins heard them arguing, they were practically shouting at each other, Anakin is planning to sleep in a different room, Anakin didn’t even call it a guest room, he called it his room even though they’ve been together for—for a year and a bit now—and isn’t that devastating? My room, Anakin had said. Does he not understand everything Obi-Wan owns is his as well? Does he…does he not want it?

“Almost,” Anakin replies. He sounds so forcefully happy that it’s manic. It comes across much too fake, and Obi-Wan can feel the way Luke immediately distrusts the word, the expression. “I just realized I forgot something at the store though! We need bread! We can’t have the stew without bread.” 

Anakin nods once to himself as he says this, shooting Obi-Wan a very quick glance before his eyes snag on the phone on the counter between them and he looks away as if incredibly pained, hands ghosting down to the pockets of his jeans to check for his keys.

Obi-Wan thinks it would really actually kill a part of him to watch Anakin drive away on his bike right now. Not to mention the twins.

Oh, the twins. 

This had been why they were so hesitant in the first place, to bite the bullet, to kiss and mean it and remember it and lean in again. Their relationship affects the twins, and as much as Obi-Wan loves Anakin, he’d been so worried about even accidentally causing the kids distress. 

He thinks seeing their father leave when they can tell something is wrong would be devastating.

“I’ll go,” Obi-Wan says, putting a hand flat on the counter, pocketing the phone, and fighting the urge to glare at Anakin because the other man should know—should think—but this Anakin is almost a stranger to him, all clenched jaw and shaking hands and it’s just a text—it sort of makes him mad as well, angry that it hurts so much, that Anakin doesn’t trust him. They’ve known each other going on three years, their entire lives were intertwined almost immediately. “Give me the keys.”

“Yeah, right,” Anakin scoffs, shoulders tense and unyielding. “To the bike?”

“No, dumb—” he cuts himself off because he’s too old to be namecalling, especially around little ears. “The keys to the car are behind you. On their hook. Can you hand them to me?”  He doesn’t think he should get within a few feet of Anakin right now. Not for fear of violence–either from him or from his partner—but because it just—it doesn’t seem like a good idea. Not when they need bread.

“Should I leave my phone?” He can’t help but ask acidly. 

“I don’t know,” Anakin shoots back with deadly accuracy, slinging the keys across the countertop hard enough that they spin out of control and Obi-Wan has to stoop to catch them “Should you?”

Obi-Wan turns and gets to the mouth of the kitchen without another word. He debates his actions, his emotions, for a second’s pause before he puts his phone on the countertop and sweeps out into the entryway and then just as quickly out of the house all together.

He can’t go far. The Skywalkers have made him incapable of it. He’ll go to the store. He’ll get Anakin his fucking bread, which really means he’ll give Anakin space to think, and he’ll take his own space to think, and then he’ll come back because it’s Anakin, it’s Anakin and it’s his family, and he thinks this is the stupidest fight in the entire goddamn world because doesn’t Anakin know how much he can’t love anyone else? Doesn’t he know that if Satine were to turn up on his doorstep tomorrow and ask for him to unsign the divorce papers, he wouldn’t even consider it?

Doesn’t he know—

“Obi?” Leia’s voice says at the same time there’s a hesitant tug on the edge of his shirt. He turns around and looks down at the girl. “Where are you going, Obi?”

“Your father wants bread for dinner,” he tells her. “So I’m going out to get bread. For dinner.”

“Oh,” Leia bites her lip before looking back behind her at the open door of the house. “Luke wants to know if you’re gonna come back, Obi.”

Since she turned seven, Leia has had trouble admitting when she wants to know something. She finds it so much easier to pretend she’s her brother’s spokesperson. “Daddy, Luke wants to know if the dog dies in the movie.” “Obi, Luke wants to know if we have to go to the barbecue, only cause Johnny is going to be there, and Luke really doesn’t like him.”

“Leia love,” Obi-Wan crouches down to look at her completely. “Of course I’m coming back. We need bread, darling.”

“I don’t want bread,” she snaps, sounding suddenly so very much like her father. “I want you.”

“Leia,” Obi-Wan pauses, smoothing his hand over the top of her hair carefully. He needs to soothe her, because he and Anakin had been so out of line earlier, fighting where the children could hear and now look what it’s done to them.

“Obi,” Luke trots out of the house before he can figure out what to say to her. “Obi, you should take this,” he holds something up and presses it into unresisting hands. “If daddy needs to keep your phone, you can have mine. Just in case you wanna talk to us while you’re gone.”

It’s the plastic, bulky flip phone that’d come in a kit of kid’s toys a Christmas ago. Smiley faces instead of buttons, but it made sounds when you hit it. Luke had been obsessed with it from the beginning.

Obi-Wan looks down at the phone and feels the very absurd urge to cry. “Loves,” he whispers, pulling Leia into his side. “Oh—”

He remembers thinking once when he’d just been given the Skywalkers, that first time he’d been asked to sit beside Luke’s bed until he fell asleep, that for children, love was about staying.

How can he possibly leave them now? When he loves them so much as well? When his love never grew out of that child��s wish for someone to stroke his hair as he dozed?

“Oh, alright, Luke, Leia,” he says, standing with only a bit of a wince because he’s getting so very old and Leia has thrown her arms around his neck unexpectedly so he rises with the weight of a child attached to him. “If your daddy wants bread, then let’s get him bread.”

“Road trip?” Leia asks with excitement.

“Better,” Obi-Wan promises, letting Luke grab onto his hand. “Science experiment.”

[val-aquenta]

1,4, and 22 for the salty asks?

Hoo boy, this is just enabling me to rant lmao. But thank you so much for the ask. <333

1. What OTP's in your fandom(s) do you just not get?

Gotta say Obitine. Uhh... I didn't get it when I first watched the cartoon, and I hated the implication that they gave Obi-Wan a romance to make Obi-Wan more 'human' (something I've heard other people push on the narrative.) I do like that it kind of showed the choice between being a Jedi and being in a commited relationship, but beyond that nothing. I also don't really like how most of Satine's whole story is determined by her romance to Obi-Wan. She's killed because of their relationship, most of the arcs with her surround the 'are they still in love and going to get with each other' narrative, and frankly it bores me. I am personally not into shipping in general, and I prefer more platonic and familial relationships like the Jedi-Clone and inter-Jedi relationships, so ships are kind of meh in general to me. I also didn't even see the appeal of their 'romance' tbh. They just seemed to argue a lot, and their confessions kind of came out of nowhere to me. If they did love each other, it really must have been a long time ago. I don't see it working?

Uhmmm off the top of my head are a few that I don't get, but I don't feel as strongly about. Qui-Gon x Shmi (never really understood why?), Rey x literally anyone lol (especially not our genocidal buddy kyle), Rose x Finn (not developed enough and then completely forgotten lmao, Ahsoka x Lux (ok this one is basically a notp tbh. Just... ew), and basically every Obi-Wan ship that I know (look he doesn't need fucing romance ok.) I didn't really want to go in depth with these because if we did heh yikes, we'd be here forever.

4. Do you have a NoTP in your fandom? Are they a popular OTP?

Hah. Anidala lol. From the top of my head, I think it's a very selfish relationship. I mean Anakin cares more about his feelings to Padmè than Padmè herself, and I feel like Padmè wants the clandestine romance vibes that come with being married to a person who is meant to be a neutral party. Especially during a war. Anakin's willingness to commit genocide for his 'love' for Padmè isn't a large sweeping romantic thing. The idea that he'd do anything for his love is pretty scary and I'm pretty sure Padmè, to some degree, knew of it. The fact that she continued to stay with him and live this double life means that she doesn't care about the consequences really. Idk I just feel like this relationship brings out the worst in both parties. The fact that Padmè is willing to deny that Anakin's fallen even when Obi-Wan comes to her door and tells her that Anakin killed Jedi could be that Padmè doesn't think Anakin capable of doing such a thing, but due to the fact that she was with him for the Tusken massacre and the whole Rush Clovis shit (and probably other tcw I don't remember) makes me think otherwise. Imo, I think that had the war ended and Palps been aprehended and everything gone well, their relationship would not have worked, because a large part of it was the fact that it was a secret thing, and that Anakin was not with Padmè that much. I don't see it working without outside factors imo, but whatever.

And, similar to many things, a lot of anidala fans are not willing to confront this truth that their relationship is built on lies and deceit and therefore will not continue to hold strong. So many of them ignore how Anakin broke his oaths as a Jedi to be impartial and place others over single people, and we all know that he did not do that when it came to Padmè. I know a lot of anidala fans aren't like this, and I'm not particularly vehement about this. This notp is more me not wanting to read anidala fics or see anidala art, and I've filtered it out. But yeah, some fan's vehemence that this was the one true thing and that if Anakin had been able to love openly (like he could... he just didn't have to be a Jedi to. Dang he really wants to eat his cak and have it too) and whatever he wouldn't have fallen just makes me... cringe a lot. Also I can't really separate what their relationship caused with the relationship itself.

22. Popular characters you hate?

Oh... uhh... this one makes me nervous ahhh. Well there are a few that I don't like as much as most people do and only a couple I hate hate. I really hate our lovely boy kyle. Uhh... mass murdering manipulator who tortures Rey and co, dude who stands by as entire planets are destroyed, and a genocidal maniac overall. I'm scared of some of his fans because yikes they're really fervent and trying to make kyle a morally grey character because of his 'redemption' during tros. Like... I don't care. You can say the same about Anakin/Vader tbh, but I think a lot of my hate for our buddy kyle comes from his fans and r*ylo stans who are very... intent on excusing Kyle's shitty actions. At least most Anakin/Vader fans know he's a shitty person and don't try and morally grey-ify him if you get what I'm saying.

Jango Fett too. I mean, I haven't read any of the books featuring him, but I'm gonna say it. Jango decided to enter that contract to create the army of clones. Essentially, he signed them up for the army in that contract with Dooku, so idc about your 'but he'd be such a good mand'alor and dad to the clones' bs, because he really wouldn't. He's incredibly selfish, and idk a lot of people seem to think he's the next best thing since sliced bread. I guess I should add Bo-Katan as well, because she's very hypocritical. the whole 'shouldn't you care about my sister' thing was not a good look because Bo-Katan, who helped bring the group of people there to destabalise her reign and kill her? Did you think deathwatch would just let her go freely? lmao with these two it's more I just don't like them that much. It's not like I hate them a whole bunch.

[experiment-000]

My Top 10 Ships of 2020

It's been a weird year but I've seen other people doing this. Plus this year I've been way more into gen fics (love a bit of found family especially in clone wars and marvel) than anything shippy. So I genuinely don't know what imma put on here aside from two ships for sure. Sorry this post is super long idk how to do the below the cut thing and I've had this app for 5 years...

10) Viktor Nikiforov and Yuuri Katsuki - Yuri!!! On Ice

It was a real toss up between this, supercorp, kanera and wolfstar cos they're all very integral ships to my fan heart but this son because of the Yuri on Ice fandom's rebirth this year. I've never stopped shipping this, never stopped reading fanfic of them for any extended period of time, they're still my most bookmarked ship on ao3 (although I think now star wars - all media types may have overtaken them for fandom). They were one of the first things I watched where the queer ship I loved became canon and I can't wait for the film (and hopefully someday a season 2). Heck I even made my mum watch Yuri on Ice with me so I think that says it all.

9) Edelgard Von Hresvelg and female Byleth - Fire Emblem: Three Houses

My first fire emblem game was fates when I was like 14 (and finally gay awake lol). I was so disappointed that I had to be with a guy character because the only female option was kinda creepy and also I wouldn't get the character of kana. So when three houses came out I was so happy because finally there were beautiful incredible female characters my female byleth could romance (I'm so sorry mlm you deserved so much more than you got). I got the game as soon as it came out (had to search a lot of shops let me tell you) and started on black eagles. I was actually kinda disappointed back in 2019. I didn't like the explore the monastery bit (still find it kinda tedious) and the battle mechanics weren't quite the same as fates (no pairing up?! Aka my main battle technique for protecting the weaker units). So I got like 20 hours in and put it down. Came back to it in lockdown and finally finished it! I'm so proud of myself I virtually never finish games. And I fully fell in love with the useless lesbian edelgard in the process. When I started back playing in 2020 I was like eh I wish I'd picked a different character to romance (like shes an emperor that's morally very shady) but then the romance stuff started with edelgard and I fell the heck in love.

8) Cory Matthews and Shawn Hunter (and Topanga Lawrence) - Boy Meets World

Disney+ was released in the UK this year and I finally got the opportunity to watch boy meets world in its best quality (aka not on YouTube). I watched it back when I was like 12 or 13 and it's such a nostalgic show for me. Watching it again I still absolutely adore it (and my bi ass was low-key crushing on Shawn especially in chick like me - I'm 18 btw and I got so scared for a sec but rider strong was 18 when chick like me came out so it's fine woah). And of course now I see the possibilities of the beautiful Cory and Shawn relationship like they were so bromance it was basically romance and throw in topanga it's the perfect ot3 (but I'm also fine with just Cory and Shawn or just Cory and Topanga). Read some good fanfic for them this year. My favourite was one about Shawn stealing makeup and stuff and exploring gender (need more fics like this I'm biiii).

7) Steve Rogers and Bucky Barnes - Marvel Cinematic Universe

I rewatched all the MCU films this year too. And got really into Peter parker whump and irondad. Plus my eternal obsession with identity and relationship reveals of course led me from Spiderman identity reveals (and found family cuteness) to stucky coming out. Especially when it involves the internet and social media. Not my favourite ship but it's been significant to my year due to the sheer amount of marvel stuff I've read.

6) Satine Kryze and Obi Wan Kenobi - Star Wars

I rewatched clone wars in prep for season 7 and wow Satine's death was sad and sudden. She first appeared in S2 E13 I think and just the sheer sexual tension of their bickering. "The sarcasm of a soldier. The delusion of a dreamer." Just ugnnhhh my bi ass can't take much more of this. And Anakin just sipping his wine in the background grinning. And I fully believe korkie is a Kenobi.

5) Commander Cody and Obi Wan Kenobi - Star Wars

I am very much an Obi wan multishipper. I don't really have a favourite but I fully believe he was with satine and Quinlan in his life. I don't think be would've actually done anything with Cody because of the whole superior officer thing. And this probably isn't even my favourite Obi wan ship - that honour probably goes to quinobi or obitine. However the most popular ships in the fandom are codywan, quiobi and obikin. No offence to anyone who ships these they're just personally not to my taste, but I can't stand quiobi, and obikin I find only slightly more tolerable and I think that's just because there's so much obikin content so if I like the concept of a fic that happens to be obikin I'll read it. I'm just not a fan of the mentor/student relationships. So I generally favoured the codywan fics when there was shipping involved meaning I read a lot of them this year. Needed that nice fix it content post season 7.

4) Zuko and Katara - Avatar: the Last Airbender

Again I am a multishipper I have nothing against zukka it's cute. But I'm a zutara shipper first and foremost because when I first watched avatar I was like 13 and denying my gayness and gayness in general so I shipped the straight things and the straight things only. Most of these ships I stopped shipping - dramione, spuffy, some my little pony ones which we don't talk about. Zutara stayed. (I have nothing against any of the things I used to ship I just stopped shipping them so much/shipped new things more). I've continuously shipped zutara since I first watched avatar even if I didn't necessarily spend that much time on it it has always been here as one of my favourite ships. It has such good fanfic I swear including my favourite ever fanfic from any fandom - love thy enemy. Plus like the black games (reread this for the millionth time this year), a delicate subterfuge (which I read for the first time this year and damn it's so good) and so many more. With the avatar resurgence this year I haven't actually rewatched avatar aside from my normal random episode every now and then when I feel like it. But there's been a lot of avatar on my dash from people I follow getting into it and people I followed for avatar returning so naturally I returned to the fandom and read quite a lot of fanfic. I also read just a lot of avatar gen fics which were great at the whole found family thing I've been so obsessed with this year.

3) Catra and Adora - She Ra and the Princesses of Power

Catradora is canon! They kissed! What more is there to say. Arguably they should've been top but I never shipped them that much since I was always very much a multishipper when it came to she ra so yes I was very happy it became canon because we actually won for once but also I've never read much fanfic for them etc. But they are very much a dynamic I love and watching she ra all again in prep for season 5 I really enjoyed the build up of their relationship. The other two only go above because Buffy is my favourite show ever and damn there's some good fuffy fanfic and Aphra and Tolvan is both fresh in my mind and star wars owns me. Would love some catradora fic recs btw if anyone has them tho.

2) Buffy Summers and Faith Lehane - Buffy the Vampire Slayer

I didn't realise it was last year that I got super into them but according to my ao3 bookmarks it was lol. 2020 I swear it's lasted an eternity. I got into them about a month before lockdown (which feels like another lifetime). I've loved Buffy since I first watched it when I was 13. It's arguably still my favourite TV show. I've been through a lot of ships for Buffy - bangel to spuffy and now fuffy. I still think angel and her were a beautiful ship back in season 2 and especially in the angel episode I will remember you. But faith and Buffy had so much chemistry in season 3 - she would've been a fresh start for Buffy and the amount of fix it fics I read I swear. My favourite has to be one where they met in LA during Anne and how that changed everything feat Buffy's internal homophobia.

1) Cheili Lona Aphra and Magna Tolvan - Star Wars

I read Darth Vader (2015) and Doctor Aphra (2016) for the first time at the end of 2020 (got a comic subscription which has served me very well already I've nearly finished the star wars canon comics). Just to see canon queer ladies in star wars was so magical for me as a queer lady. I didn't think star wars would be so overt yet as to have a queer kiss in canon (even if it's in the comics) and especially not with the main character of arguably their main comic series. Now we just gotta hope that we'll get it in live action someday soon. They weren't the ship I consumed the most content of in 2020 but they were the highlight of my 2020 because star wars did that and I finally found out about it

Honourable mentions: Vivian and Elle - Legally Blonde, Candace and Vanessa - Phineas and Ferb, Stevie and Alex - Wizards of Waverly Place, Xander and Spike - Buffy the Vampire Slayer (I actually don't ship this but damn some authors are good - this was the ship that made me realise I don't need to like a ship if the author is good enough to write it well), Eli Vanto and Mitth'raw'nuruodo - Star Wars (started reading the books last year but finished this year and only started with fanfic this year), Villanelle and Eve - Killing Eve, Kanan and Hera - Star Wars, Barriss and Ahsoka - Star Wars, Remus and Sirius - Harry Potter, Kara and Lena - Supergirl (let's hope this becomes canon next year!) (Those last four are ones I've shipped forever some of my og ships but nothing particularly big has happened for me this year with them so)

I got Disney+ this year so rewatched a fair few things from my youth and though hey my obsession with that character may have been a little gay.

[likeholymary]

— untitled ii.

playlist | masterlist

summary: once dear friends in college, obi-wan and (y/n) have bumped into each other in the capitol city of coruscant while both working there. will they rekindle their old romance from their college years, or will they remain as passing faces in each other’s lives? takes place in college years and 10+ years after.

a/n: fluff AND MORE ANGST awaits you in this chapter! also some good music references await you as well😌 also, just to note, i am a slut for obi-wan and his beard, so yes, he does have a bit of a beard in his college years, i do not accept any slander for this creative decision bc you can’t deny how hot the man is with a beard. also, not as much college content, but there will be more in part three! i hope you all enjoy! please reblog if you like this enough to do so, i appreciate it more than words can say! i love you all☺️ warnings! a few swear words!

word count: 3.7k words

present.

“AUNTIE (Y/N)!”

You could hear the chorus of the screaming twins from your car, a smile beginning to inch its way across your lips, despite the heavy weight of a decade of old baggage weighing down on you more and more throughout the day. At least now you would be able to bask in some temporary, if not chaotic, joy brought by Luke and Leia.

The blonde and brunette came skidding up to your knees, running so quickly they almost knocked you over. You laughed openly, bending down to let the two envelope themselves around you. Luke crawled up on you back, asking politely for a piggy back ride into the house, while Leia simply just crawled up on you, wrapping her legs around you waist and holding onto your shoulders, despite the fact that you were carrying your very large purse. You just hoped you didn’t drop it - after all, it did have your datapad in it, and you did not want to break that thing.

“Auntie (Y/N), have you been crying?” 

Leia was never one to shy away from the facts. That five year old would be the end of you.

While Leia looked at you quizzically, Luke stroked your hair with his little hands. “Are you sad, auntie? We can eat your favorite chocolate if that will make you not sad anymore. I don’t want you to be sad.” And that five year old would probably make you cry again, his sweet natured personality always shining through.

“Whose crying? No crying, we’re all fine!” 

Anakin came rushing through the dining area from the kitchen to the front door where you stood with the twins still clinging to your body, and he nearly slipped and fell on his face as he ran too quickly with socks on the wood floor. 

Luke and Leia giggled as he stumbled and caught himself before the both crawled off of you, now attempting to tackle their father. 

“No, no, no wrestling right now, guys!” 

Now it was you who could not hold back a small snicker, watching the poor father be smothered by his two children. It took him a moment to pry them off his legs.

Anakin leaned against the archway leading into the kitchen attempting to catch his breath as he laughed. “I’m not even going to apologize for the twins because I’m pretty sure you and I were the same way.”

You set your bag down on the bench by the door, shrugging your blazer off. “I don’t know, I think the twins are at least open with one another.”

Music from the 70s played in the background from C-3PO’s portable extension speaker. Anakin looked confused, coming up to rest a hand on your shoulder. “What are you talking about? We tell each other everything, we— oh. Oh no.”

Now, granted, Anakin had thought that keeping Obi-Wan’s return a secret was a good idea. Initially. He now realizes he was so wrong as he looks at the deadly expression on your face, the way your eyebrows are arched, the way you clench and unclench your fists and then shake them as if attempting to shake off your emotions, but he sees you slipping. 

You’re going to kick his ass and he knows it.

Damn, I knew I should have told Padmé and asked for her advice. Anakin thought as ‘Does Your Mother Know’ by ABBA began to blast through the speaker in the kitchen.

“You better start running, Skywalker.”

“You better start running, Skywalker.”

Anakin whipped around the corner, knowing all too well that he was in some deep kriffing trouble. You were hot on his tail, still in your heels, and you would not let him get away. He, after all, was in socks, and therefore would be more prone to slipping. You, on the other hand, had been challenged by Anakin a few years ago to run in your heels as he believed that it was impossible. He had been wrong then, and he was still wrong now.

You both remembered in that moment chasing each other through your homes back in Tatooine, cracking jokes and waiting to tackle each other or wrestle each other for victory. You were proud to say you often beat Anakin because he was.... well, honestly, he was a weakling when you were young.

Anakin was practically your brother, you were everything to each other, and you felt as if this was a deep betrayal. Anakin knew how broken you had been after your unspeakable breakup with Obi-Wan, but he, being the idiot he was, obviously had kept this tidbit of information to himself.

And for what gain? Did he really think you would allow yourself to fall back into Obi-Wan’s arms? Did he really think everything would go back to the way it was in college, that the four of you would go back to having double-dates, that what? you and Obi-Wan would get married and have children of your own?

What a foolhardy dream that was, and you knew it more than anyone. 

Chasing him through the living room, he ran through into the dining room, running around the long table. You caught up just as quickly, grabbing the table and giving it a light shove to knock into him. He stumbled a bit but grabbed the table to ground himself.

“(Y/N), I’m sorry, I should have told you—“

“Sorry?” You said incredulously. You laughed, astounded by your idiot of a best friends stupid response. “Oh, we are past sorry. I can’t believe you didn’t tell me! You knew what he put me through. You were there, helping pick up the pieces that he left behind. And only now you think it’s a good idea to not tell me he would be waltzing back into our lives?”

Anakin winced at every word, knowing he had royally forked (his vernacular changed after having children) up. Where was Padmé when he needed her to calm you and your fiery temper down?

You grabbed one of your heels and chucked it at his head, knowing he would dodge it, but you still almost wished it would have at least given him a bruise. And of course, he dodged it.

Anakin began running again, this time cutting through the kitchen. “Anakin Skywalker, you get back here!”

Now, you were wondering where the twins had run off to. Surely they would want to see you kick their father’s butt. 

Well, the twins had run off to go grab their foam swords once you had begun chasing their father, but had a minor argument about whether or not the swords were in Luke’s room or the playroom (they were actually hidden in the hall closet, I wonder who put them there).

“Aunt (Y/N), here, get him!” Leia yelled at you, throwing you one of the foam swords, while Luke politely handed Anakin the other. “Sorry dad, I’m rooting for Aunt (Y/N).” Luke whispered.

Anakin smiled sadly. “Me too, bud.”

The living room was sunken in, and quite an open space, with divider couches in the center of the area, plenty of space to run around and play in. Perfect for having a set of chaotic twins. And now perfect for a foam sword duel between you and Anakin. ABBA still blasted from the speakers, and it only helped in amping your frustrations.

You stood behind one of the couches, panting heavily as you began to pace in place.

You understood why Anakin had stayed friends with Obi-Wan. Obi-Wan was the only real male figure in his life, both like a brother and a father, but after they served together in the Republic army it became more apparent that their brotherly bond was something that could transcend lifetimes.

However, had Anakin so quickly forgotten the state you had been left in after discovering Obi-Wan’s relationship with Satine?

You couldn’t think about those memories right now, having already spent all day dwelling on the past, barely getting any work done.

You charged at Anakin, beginning to beat him with your foam sword, and he took it, as he felt he should, feeling the betrayal you felt with each strike. “Would you at least fight back?” You yelled. “This isn’t much of a fight, and your children are watching. Talk about embarrassing, Skywalker.” You breathed heavily, ceasing to beat Anakin as he grabbed the foam blade you had raised, ready to hit him some more.

“I’m not going to fight you, (Y/N/N).”

You paused, looking up into his soft, crystal blue eyes and you began to feel it.

Your tough, anger-filled facade began to crack, Obi-Wan’s memory once again taking a hammer and destroying any mask you would try and force upon yourself to keep anyone from seeing even a sliver of sadness out of you. A singular tear began to slip down your cheek as Anakin cupped your cheek, frowning knowingly, before enveloping you in one of those infamous Skywalker hugs that you knew was a true gift every time you received one. The twins even came up, both of them hugging each of your legs.

“I wish you would have at least let me punch you,” you mumbled into his chest. You could feel his laughter rumbling through his chest, just as you heard the garage door opening.

“Pads must be home,” you sighed, pushing Anakin away as you went to pick up Leia, Luke running to the door. What a momma’s boy.

Padmé looked forever beautiful, even after a day at work. She kicked off her heels and set down her large purse on the bench by the garage door, grinning as she saw Luke running toward him. She was quick to pick the five-year old up, greeting him excitedly. 

“And where is your sister?” “With Auntie (Y/N)!” 

Padmé turned the corner to find you holding her daughter, doting on her twin buns and poking her nose, thanking her for ‘the sword’ she had given you.

“What’s this about a sword fight?” Padmé questioned with a raised brow and a smile.

“Mommy! Auntie (Y/N) kicked Daddy’s butt!”  “Yeah! He made her cry!”

Padmé’s eyes flashed with both concern and anger, glaring quickly at Anakin and then casting a soft gaze of concern upon you, reaching out with her free hand to graze your arm affectionately. 

“But I’m not really sure why he made her cry... We were too busy grabbing the foam swords.” Anakin mumbled, “Yeah, I thought I had hidden those after last time...” “What!” Both of the twins shouted, quickly slipping themselves out of you and Padmé’s arms to go chase their father and tackle him for the 8th time that day.

“Why did Ani make you cry?”

You bit your lip, chewing on it like you used to when you were nervous, an old habit you couldn’t shake in your most anxious days.

“Obi-Wan is back and Anakin knew. He... he didn’t tell me.”

There was nothing more you needed to say, and Padmé grabbed your hand, dragging you back to her room so you could relay all of the details and she could change after a long day in the office. As you relayed the details of literally walking into Obi-Wan and Anakin’s knowledge that he withheld about Kenobi’s return (“Oh, he is going to regret having kept that from me”), Padmé would gasp from the inside of her walk-in closet every once and awhile at what comments you had made as well as Obi-Wan’s attitude that he could make such a return and act as if there were no consequences. 

She came back out in more comfortable clothes, a teal oversized-cropped sweatshirt and some grey sweatpants with fuzzy socks seemed to be the comfy-mom fit, paired with a low messy bun. How she managed to still look stunning was beyond you, but Padmé could walk around in a potato sack, and the press would call it a fashion statement that would quickly become the latest trend. She was astounding.

Padmé came and sat down next to you on her and Anakin’s bed, pulling you into a warm hug. You took a shaky breath as the tears finally began to fall. He was breaking you again. And you couldn’t stand the feeling of helplessness that washed over you as your shoulders began to shake. You tried muffling your sobs, but it was so hard to hold back the waters after the dam had already cracked and had begun to flood, rushing through you with memories of a now wished forgotten yesterday.

college years. 

You had survived the first few weeks of college thus far and you were more than happy for it. 

Of course, you had a few whacky professors (like the one who didn’t understand his students sarcasm, or the one who talked about anything other than the course work), but you had survived your first few sets of midterms, save the last one you had later this afternoon. 

You made your way to your favorite place on campus, the small Twin Suns Coffee Bar that was nestled inside the student activity center. It wasn’t a place to sit and chat with friends, more just the basic aspect and aesthetic of a regular Twin Suns, simply a coffee bar there to fuel the students making their way to different classes, jobs or internships. 

You strangely loved the busy atmosphere, well, when you yourself weren’t busy, and you had a few hours to fuel up on some coffee and break into a study session before your exam. As you got in line, you enjoyed watching the people rush by, listening to the sound of coffee beans grinding, the soft indie music playing through the speakers. 

As you stood, lightly swaying and breathing in the smell of the rich espresso being poured over some milk, you spotted a familiar head of golden hair headed this way. 

Obi-Wan had his nose stuck in a book, but he easily maneuvered among the bustling of the people as he would through the student center. You tried waving to get his attention, however it seemed he was to enraptured in whatever he was reading to fully pay attention to his surroundings. 

You rolled your eyes and chuckled, he seemed to be like this quite often, or at least, that’s how he seemed whenever you visited his and Anakin’s apartment. Always studying. Anakin tried to convince you that he was the actually amusing individual he described, that he was just busy with his studies as he had some more advanced classes he was taking. Thus far, you were not convinced. 

You finally decided to call his name. “Obi-Wan!” 

His head shot up in an alert sort-of surprise, and after a moment his eyes finally caught with yours and a small smile crossed his features as he made his way towards you at the back of the line.

“I haven’t seen you in awhile, (Y/N).”

“You saw me last night at your apartment.”

“Oh, yes, that’s right.” He chuckled to himself, ducking his head in embarrassment as he rubbed the back of his neck. “I suppose I’ve been rather busy with my courses this semester.”

“Yes, that’s what Anakin has told me. He talked you up so much as some reckless guy like him, but so far I haven’t seen any proof of such an Obi-Wan. Perhaps you’ve gotten too old.” You said slyly, smirking in just the slightest way, your comment causing him to laugh. 

His eyes twinkled down at you, and they seemed to shine in the light from the coffee bar, it seemed almost unfair to be in his presence. He was just too beautiful, those cerulean eyes so captivating and difficult to look away from... 

“Too old? Well, after such an insult I suppose I won’t invite you to the little party Anakin and I were going to tonight.” He looked up, feigning to be studying the menu as his lips curved into a cheeky grin, knowing he had caught your attention now.

“A party?” Your eyes snapped to look up at him, your eyes begging him to look down at you. You composed yourself, mimicking his position as you stared at the menu, even though you already knew what you wanted. “Anakin would take me anyways,” you stated nonchalantly, “but would this party mean getting to see you with your nose out of a book for once?”

Obi-Wan turned to face you now, looking down at you with that impish grin still stuck on his face, his dimples peaking out from his beard. “I suppose you’ll have to determine that, my dear.”

A blush began to creep up your neck, and you could feel your face getting hot as you stared into his eyes, refusing to break eye contact.

“Hi, can I take your order?” The impatient barista asked, watching awkwardly as the two of you stared at each other. 

Obi-Wan calmly turned to the barista, and ordered a nitro cold brew before turning to you, motioning for you to order as he pulled out his wallet. “Order whatever you’d like, it’s on me today.” 

You shook your head, rolling your eyes. “Oh, don’t tell me you’re trying to win me over now by buying me coffee?” “Well, I at least want to seem interesting, and what’s more interesting than a bit of chivalry in this modern world?”

You couldn’t help but giggle at his comment, trying desperately to look anywhere than his piercing gaze.  “You should take the offer.” The barista said, and you stared at her incredulously, biting your lip and huffing before you begrudgingly ordered your favorite drink. 

Obi-Wan walked with you over to the waiting area, grabbing a napkin as soon as you reached it. He pulled a sharpie out from one of the side pockets on his backpack, and then began to scrawl something out on the napkin before handing it to you. His fingers brushed across yours just briefly, but you swore you felt an electrifying tingle shoot up your arm and a warm feeling following.

It had his phone number on it.  “So you can text me later about tonight to let me know if you’re finally ready to get to know me.”

You pointed a finger at him as your eyebrows began to furrow. “Hey, you’re the one whose always too busy whenever I am around.” Now you had him pinned. He was being such a flirt, you almost couldn’t believe his smug attitude, no matter how endearing it felt or how much it made you a little weak in the knees.  “Who said I wouldn’t make time for you?” 

You thought you would collapse then and there. Obi-Wan leaned down, whispering in your ear.  “You only had to ask.” 

Just then the barista called his name, and his lips were gone, having brushed just lightly against your ear. This was not the Kenobi you had imagined when Anakin had told you all about their grand collegiate adventures. 

No, this was so much better.

Obi-Wan handed you your drink, flashing you a smile as he began to walk away, backwards.  “I hope to see you later tonight, darling.”

And then he began to blend back into the crowd, but you could still see remnants of his perfect golden hair moving as he continued to drift from view until you could no longer see him. 

“You love him and you never let him go.” The barista behind you said, looking just as charmed by Obi-Wan as you felt.

“Yeah, I will.” You responded, still left in the daze that now seemed to consume you. How were you going to even be able to study for your test now?

present.

After dinner, the twins had pleaded for yet another infamous movie night with Auntie (Y/N). Of course, you caved, even though you could have probably used a night in with a bottle of wine and some tissues for the inevitable onslaught of tears that were to come once you were alone again.  You were just about three-fourths of the way through Finding Nemo when the twins fell asleep, Luke laying on the pillow in your lap and Leia cuddled up against Padmé. You smiled down at Luke, affectionately running your fingers through his hair as he lightly snored. Just like his dad, you thought. 

Someone’s phone buzzed, but you didn’t really care, just trying to focus on the movie and not think about the day you had just had. Anakin got up as the phone continued to buzz with text after text. “Uh... It’s for me, I’ll be right back.”

“Okay, don’t be too long, I’ll need your help putting the twins to bed soon.”

Padmé turned to look at you, while you continued to watch the Disney movie on the screen, Dory yelling after Marvin after they lost their chance at finding Nemo. You tried focusing on the movie, but after the long, emotional day you had, your thoughts began to slip back to him.  “I look at you and I’m home.”

You tried wiping away the tears, but it was hard to do so with Luke practically sprawled on top of you. Maybe it was time for that bottle of wine. 

You pulled Luke off of you, moving his sleepy body right beside Leia’s on top of Padmé. “Are you leaving?” She asked. You nodded your head, watching as Luke nuzzled himself into a comfortable position, cuddling closely to his mother.  “Well, drive safe, and make sure to text Anakin or I when you get home safely. Speaking of, where is he?”

“I’m sure he’s just taking a breath outside or something. I’ll see you later, Pads.”

You wiped away any remaining tears as you stood by the front door, grabbing your purse and blazer. However, as you stood by the door, you heard quiet muffled voices somewhere in the front yard that sounded like they were arguing. Anakin better not be arguing with the neighbors over mowing the lawn again...

You gently opened the front door, trying not to make too much noise not only for the sake of the twins but also so you wouldn’t spook whoever it was who was outside. When you turned around after shutting the door however, the voices stopped. 

And standing on the sidewalk next to you car was Obi-Wan. 

[fadinglight123]

More clone headcanons I guess????

Part 1       Part 3        Part 4

So the first part of this got like. An insane amount of notes over the last day or so and now more stuff is rattling around in my head so...have some more?

So in the first one I mentioned the 501st and 212th using Mando’a to talk shit and complain about Obi-Wan and Anakin while they’re in the same room. Cody in particular is known to receive batshit plans from his General, say “yes, general” and then immediately turn to the nearest clone (usually Waxer or Boil) and complain about how reckless these plans are

What the clones don’t know is that, due to how much time he’s spent with Satine and his whole diplomat schtick, he’s learned how to speak Mando’a quite well. He knows exactly what they’re saying. He hears everything. He never feels the need to fill the clones in on this fact, finds the whole thing amusing, though he was maybe a bit offended at first

Anakin never learned more than the very basics, a few words here or there. He recognizes the language but figures it’s just a clone thing and that they’re discussing logistics or something

The first time he asked, Rex panicked and fed him a line Cody gave him (Force knows he can’t lie worth a damn on his own) about logistics or something and he never questioned it bc Wis is Anakin’s dump stat

The first time Rex and Cody did this whole routine in front of them, Anakin was very confused since he knows Obi-Wan understands them.

The exchange probably went something like this:

Cody & Rex: *complaining about the plan for their next mission*

Anakin: Oh, is that Mando’a? =)

Rex:

Cody:

Obi-Wan: *subtly shaking his head ‘no’ at Anakin*

Rex: Yes, General.

Anakin: Nice! You guys seem to prefer talking logistics in it. Cody, do you and Obi-Wan ever just strategize in Mando’a instead of Basic?

Obi-Wan: *frantically trying to signal Anakin to stop kriffing talking*

Cody:

Rex:

Anakin: *blissfully ignorant* =)

Cody: No, sir? General Kenobi doesn’t speak Mando’a???

Anakin: ??? What? But-

Obi-Wan: aNYWAY, so the plan-

Cody & Rex: ??????

if Cody ever finds out, he straight up can’t look Obi Wan in the eye for at least a week; the entire 212th is in the same boat. A few of them, Cody included, awkwardly try to apologize without actually bringing up that they’ve been calling their general an idiot while he’s right there, but Obi Wan waves it off.

anytime other clones complain in Mando’a while Obi Wan is in earshot, the 212th look live they’ve seen a ghost

They never bring it up. Ever.

Cody is actually one of the few clones who can kind of lie? And saying that he’s lying is kind of a stretch. It’s more like he’s picked up (partially from Obi Wan) how to bend the truth. He can say things that are somewhat true convincingly enough to fool most people. And he is very rarely called on it bc no one expects him to even attempt to lie or hide things

While it varies a little from clone to clone, the vast majority are very comfortable with physical affection. It comes from spending their entire lives in close military quarters surrounded by their brothers

Cuddle piles are a big thing when there’s downtime and nothing better to do. The 501st in particular is known for being very affectionate. More than once, Anakin walked into the barracks and found a bunch of off-duty clones in a pile sleeping on each other 

Rex is lowkey a father-figure to the 501st, and is always willing to offer affection and encouragement to any vod that needs it, but especially shinies and less experienced troopers 

ARCs and other ranking troopers technically have separate barracks from  regular soldiers, but that never really stood in  the 501st. When they occupied the barracks Fives and Echo basically initiated an open-door policy for any vod who needed something, whether it was advice, cuddles, or just a relatively peaceful place to hang out and decompress

Fives kept this going long after Echo was believed KIA; in fact, when he returned from Lola Sayu without his twin, Torrent rallied to make sure he was never alone unless he asked to be. There were always clones there ready to return the favor he and Echo had provided for them so many times before

Jesse, Kix, and Hardcase could often be found hanging out with Echo and Fives there, even moreso after Echo’s death. After Umbara, Jesse and Kix practically moved into the barracks with Fives any time he was stationed with the 501st and not off doing ARC missions somewhere else. Once they became close friends, Tup also moved in

Fives, Echo, Jesse, and Kix were close friends; it was common to see them in a cuddle pile sleeping on each other; over the course of the war, their little band gained and lost many members (Echo, Hardcase, Dogma, Tup, Fives). The survivors always pulled together even closer after a loss; by the end of the war, it was down to just Kix and Jesse (and for a brief time, Echo returned)

Rex was close with most of their group, and watching as their numbers shrunk down was probably one of the most painful reminders of the tragedy of war for him 

Hardcase and Fives have whatever the clone/Star Wars equivalent to ADHD is, I will die on this hill 

Tup is the baby brother of their group, and the others treat him as such. He doesn’t mind the extra affection or the fact that he has several brothers, including an ARC trooper, ready and willing to kick the ass of anyone who messes with him. But the teasing and babying is something he could do without. He’s yelled at them about it

Fives, in particular, is a little shit and does it just to rile him up, they all know Tup is a very competent trooper, even if he’s a bit more reserved than the rest of them. But they’re brothers first and foremost and that means they have to pick on the youngest from time to time

It’s late so I’ll call it done. Let me know if I should keep doing these, I guess?

[dettiot]

the town on the prairie

When he stepped off the train, the first thing Ben Kenobi noticed was the fresh, strong wind. It made the prairie grasses sway, tossing the wildflowers that bloomed among the grasses. It caused the little meadowlarks to dip and soar as they sang their song. 

And it filled his heart with gratitude for God, for creating such a world. 

“Mr. Kenobi?” 

Turning his head, he saw a few men gathered in a clump. The one who spoke revealed himself to be a young man, several years younger than Ben himself, who smiled and tipped his broad-brimmed hat at him. “Welcome to Kalevala.”

“Thank you,” Ben said, tucking the carpetbag with his clothes under his arm and extending his hand. 

“Anakin Skywalker,” the young man said with a hearty shake, before turning to the other men. “This is Mr. Rex, the blacksmith, Mr. Dex of Dex’s Hotel and Restaurant, Mr. Kryze who runs our general store and is the justice of the peace, and finally, Mayor Palpatine.” 

Shaking hands and exchanging greetings, Ben did his best to make a good impression. These were clearly the leading men of town, and if he wanted to stay in Kalevala, and make the Congregational Church a success, he would need their support. 

“Mr. Kenobi, it’s a pleasure to have you here,” the mayor said, speaking last of the group. “Kalevala is a godly town, to be sure, but the presence of a minister leading services can only be a positive.” 

There was something about the elderly man that troubled Ben. He was saying the precise words that Ben would have expected him to say, but . . . they had no feeling behind them. 

What a strange feeling, Ben thought as he did his best to shake aside his thoughts and stay in this moment. 

“Thank you, sir,” Ben replied instead. “I want to start services as soon as possible.” 

The mayor smiled. “Just what I hoped to hear. You’ll have to talk to young Anakin here about the progress on the church building; he’s in charge of it.”

Anakin looked like he was barely out of his teens, but then, Ben supposed the prairie made you grow up fast. 

“I’ll be takin’ you over to the hotel to get you settled,” Anakin said. “Here, let me--”

He reached out to take one of the two carpetbags that Ben was carrying. Unfortunately, the young man grabbed the one with all of Ben’s books. 

“This way,” Anakin said, barely showing any discomfort at the heavy load, as he took off walking. 

Nodding quickly to the other men, Ben hurried after Anakin. “Mr. Skywalker, you don’t need to carry my bag--”

“Nothing to it,” Anakin said, his smile free and open and easy. “Like the mayor said, the church building is comin’ along. I thought you’d want to prioritize that, before your house. So we’ll be puttin’ you up at Dex’s until the church is finished and I can get your place done. Shouldn’t be more than a few weeks--month at most.” 

“Thank you,” Ben said, surprised at the young man’s informality and ease. It made him feel stiff and upright, but . . . he didn’t know how else to be. 

“What brings you to the prairie?” Anakin asked, picking his way along the road between two lines of pine buildings, their false fronts making each edifice look taller than it actually was. 

Even though Ben had answered that question truthfully whenever he was asked why he was going to the wilds of Dakota, instead of staying at a church in New York, he found himself being more honest with this young man. “I wanted to see the frontier. To . . . to feel like I was making a difference in a place where vices aren’t so evil.” 

Anakin’s face, even shadowed by his hat, seemed to darken. “I thought all vice was evil and a sin.” 

“They are,” Ben said, trying not to fidget with his carpetbag. “At least, they are all evil to different degrees. A liking for drink, feelings of envy or jealousy or unkindness . . . those are simple. Easy to understand, easy to address. But vices such as a need for power, the manipulation of the truth, vanity and pride and hypocrisy . . . When men think they do not live on God’s Earth and they take pleasure in their vices, it is hard for a man of God to work against such a mindset.” 

He supposed Anakin must think him a coward, since Ben was thinking the same thing of himself. He rushed ahead. “I worked in a city in New York, where powerful men made all the rules. They would gladly offer up a hundred dollars when a flood wiped out peoples’ homes--yet if a beggar came to their door, they would call out the dogs. And I found myself longing to be in a place that wasn’t so built up and old.” 

“Huh,” Anakin said. “Guess I never thought about it like that.” 

A strained silence fell between them, only punctuated by the sound of the town around them. As he caught sight of the signboard advertising Dex’s Hotel and Restaurant, Ben squared his shoulders. “I apologize for talking so much.” 

“No apology necessary,” Anakin said, pushing open the door of the hotel and holding it for Ben. He whipped off his hat and smiled at Ben again. “You’ve given me somethin’ to think about. I nearly went into the ministry, myself. A preacher wanted to adopt me when I was small, but I stayed with my mom. I couldn’t leave her.” 

As soon as Ben was through the door, and before he had finished digesting this unexpected bit of news, Anakin stopped holding the door and hurried over to the front desk. “Mom?” he called out, his smile growing truly brilliant when an older woman, short and with dark, gray-streaked hair, appeared. 

“Hello, Ani,” she said with a smile, before looking at Ben. “Hello, Mr. Kenobi. Welcome to Dex’s.” 

“Thank you,” Ben said, approaching the woman and finding himself growing more at peace than he had been in quite a while. Her brown eyes were warm and knowing, making Ben feel measured without being judged. 

Then she smiled and dipped in a shallow curtsey. “Mrs. Shmi Skywalker. Let me get you your room key so you can rest after your journey.” 

“I appreciate that, Mrs. Skywalker,” Ben said. “Your son was very kind to listen to me talk his ear off on the way from the train station.” 

Mrs. Skywalker smiled brightly at her son, who looked both sheepish and unrepentant. “Ani has always been so curious.” 

“So was I--and still am, I must admit,” Ben said, his shoulders relaxing. 

“Curiosity is a good thing,” Mrs. Skywalker acknowledged as she handed him over a key and two folded towels. “Hotel guests get their meals in the restaurant. It’s after lunch now, but I’m sure we can get you some tea and a sandwich to hold you until dinner.”

Ben was ready to demur about needing any food, even though his stomach felt very empty, when Anakin suddenly straightened up and began smoothing his wind-mussed hair. 

Mrs. Skywalker gave her son a fond look, then glanced out the window. “Although plans do change.” 

The door of the hotel opened and Ben turned to see two young women enter. They were quite dissimilar in appearance: one was petite and brunette, with warm brown eyes and an air of kindness and quiet strength. When she looked at Anakin, her whole face lit up with a happy smile. 

Her companion, however . . . she was tall and long-limbed, graceful and strong. Her hair was the color of sunlight on a winter’s morning and her eyes were like chips of blue ice. Her eyes met his and Ben wondered why he felt an instant spark. She seemed so reserved and distant, like an ice goddess from a children’s fairy story, yet . . . he didn’t think that was who she truly was. 

“Good afternoon, Miss Amidala, Miss Kryze,” Mrs. Skywalker said. “I see you couldn’t wait to meet our new minister.” 

“Well, Satine did and I just came along,” said the brunette woman, finally tearing her eyes away from Anakin.

Ben did his best to juggle his carpetbag, his hat, and his room key and towels, before he finally thought to place the last three items on the desk in order to face the ladies with a free hand. 

“Good afternoon. It’s a pleasure to make your acquaintance,” he said, wondering which one was Miss Amidala and which one was Miss Kryze. “Miss Kryze, are you related to the Mr. Kryze who runs the town general store?” 

“He’s my father,” the blonde said, tilting her head as she looked at him. 

Unlike Mrs. Skywalker, there was definitely judgement in her gaze. Ben did his best to withstand her scrutiny, feeling thankful when the brunette--Miss Amidala--stepped forward with a friendly smile. 

“I’m Padme Amidala,” she said, offering a gentle curtsey. “I’m the schoolteacher.” 

“Ben Kenobi, miss,” he said, bowing to her. “Perhaps later we could talk about any religious instruction I might offer to your students. Or perhaps a Sunday school.” 

“That would be wonderful,” Miss Amidala said. She glanced at her friend and laughed softly. “Satine, perhaps you should introduce yourself now that you’ve gotten a measure of Mr. Kenobi.” 

Miss Kryze gave Miss Amidala a look, then turned back to Ben. “Satine Kryze, as you’ve probably figured out by now. Mr. Kenobi, what is your position on heathens and atheists?” 

Ben blinked a little. “Atheists? People who don’t believe in God?” 

She nodded. “Do you think people who believe in other Gods, or don’t believe in God at all, should be left alone and not preached at, or do you think they should be forced to endure your church services and give lip service to things they do not believe in?” 

It was such an odd question, one he had been totally unprepared for. He knew what the teachings of his Church was, how the other ministers who had taught him would respond. He thought for a moment, and then realized he didn’t want to just spout cliches. 

“Speaking for myself alone . . . I don’t think anyone responds to being preached at,” Ben said. “I think if someone has different beliefs or does not even believe in God, that is their faith, not any different from the faith I have in God and His great works. I would hope we have advanced past the idea of all of us needing to believe the same things in order to live in a community together. However, I hope the church here in Kalevala can do good for all of its residents, regardless of their beliefs.” 

He paused, and couldn’t help a small smile. “And maybe they might want to listen to a sermon or two and see if there’s anything I might offer to them as spiritual comfort.”

“Ahhh, and here comes the stick to go with the carrot,” Miss Kryze said, her nose wrinkling. “Charity should not come with strings.” 

“Did I say that?” Ben said, doing his best to hold on to his temper. “I don’t believe I did, Miss Kryze.” 

She tossed her head. “Ministers are all alike. Full of expressions of piety and goodness, but just as venal and vengeful as any man.” 

His blood boiled at her casual dismissal. He knew he should turn the other cheek, try and defuse the growing tension, but . . . but . . . 

“I suppose you must be an atheist, Miss Kryze. Rest assured that you could lose everything tomorrow, and I would still pray for you and do everything in my power to help you, even if you kept insulting me the whole time,” Ben retorted. 

“We cannot look to God to save us,” Miss Kryze said, stepping closer to him. “We can be a community without piety or faith, simply by relying on our shared bonds as humans and workers in a world determined to crush us.” 

“Without faith, there is nothing,” Ben said, hearing how loud his voice was and unable to lower it. 

Suddenly, Mrs. Skywalker appeared, taking Miss Kryze’s arm. “Please, you’re both causing a disturbance. I’m sure neither of you are at your best at the moment, so perhaps you could continue this conversation later.” 

Miss Kryze looked immediately regretful. But when her eyes met Ben’s again, he knew her regret was for being loud, not for her actual words. 

“I apologize, Mrs. Skywalker,” she said quietly. 

“Having strong opinions is nothing to apologize for,” she said with a gentle smile. “It was very entertaining to watch you two. Perhaps we could start a debating society in town.”

Miss Kryze looked intrigued, but then let out a soft laugh that sounded like bells ringing. “My father would love that.” 

“I thought so as well,” Mrs. Skywalker said, her eyes dancing with mischief. At that moment, Ben could see the resemblance between herself and her son, given their physical disparity. 

Miss Kryze looked at Ben again, one eyebrow arched. “If I haven’t scared you off, perhaps we could continue this discussion another time?” 

Ben bowed a little, grateful to have regained a hold on his temper and remembering the need to not ruffle anyone’s feathers. “Of course, Miss Kryze.” 

She frowned for a moment, like she was confused, before she turned and then cleared her throat loudly. 

Miss Amidala, who had drawn close to Anakin, straightened up and blushed quickly. She gave a flustered smile to Anakin, who smiled back at her like she was his sun, and then followed Miss Kryze out the door. 

Anakin drifted over to stand beside Ben. “Isn’t she something?” he said, gazing out the window at the two ladies. 

They were talking to another young woman, allowing Ben and Anakin to watch them both. And even though Ben knew that Anakin was talking about Miss Amidala, he found his own eyes drifting towards Miss Kryze. 

“Yes . . . she is something,” he said quietly.

End.

My Star Wars Fic Masterlist

[galaxymysteryelephant]

The Start of Something New 3

The final chapter is up and available here.

Part one; Chapter one; Chapter two

---

After finishing up in the kitchen, Rex leads Ben to the living room where the two of them can chat for a while.

The two sit in silence for several minutes as Ben takes in his surroundings. “I don’t think I mentioned this earlier, but you have a lovely home,” Ben comments.

“I am glad you like it,” Rex says.

“I do very much, it has such a homey feel,” Ben says. His smile widens when he sees Rex’s smile directed at him.

Ben’s eyes scan the room: the walls are lined with bookshelves, there is a fireplace against one of the walls, and a bay window on the adjacent wall.

Ben’s gaze lingers on the bay window, the perfect place to curl up with a good book. Ben cannot help but picture himself reading in that exact spot, with Rex in the next room making dinner for the two of them. Ben forces the thought away.

“I take it you like to read,” Ben casually says as he eyes the bookshelves lining Rex’s living room.

“Yeah,” Rex responds as he takes a seat on his couch. “I find it more enjoyable than watching the tele.”

“I know what you mean,” Ben says, a smile gracing his features. “There is nothing in the world that compares to getting engrossed in a good book.”

“Exactly,” Rex says, returning Ben’s smile. “Growing up, Cody used to tease me all the time for reading, he still does actually.”

“Reading was a big way for me to deal with a lot of things when I was a kid,” Ben admits. “It became my coping mechanism.”

“People just don’t understand the importance of escaping your world into another one.”

“I know exactly what you mean. The idea of leaving your world behind is so appealing for that reason: you can escape.” Ben looks at the wall lost in thought. “After losing my step-mom, I wouldn’t talk to anyone. I allowed myself to get absorbed in books and allowed them to take me to other places. It was away for me to forget about the world around me and all of my struggles. A pretty unhealthy way to deal with things, according to my brother. I guess to me seeing the fictional character struggle and overcome his situation helped me deal with my own problems. Most of the time, I think that reading is the only thing that is keeping me sane.”

“Is that why you became an English professor?” Rex inquires.

“How did you know that?” Ben asks, not recalling a time when he revealed that information to the blond man.

“I overheard you talking to one of your student’s at the cafe,” Rex states.

“Oh, I suppose you would have. I go to the cafe because my colleagues are so rambunctious that it is hard to get any work done. And as a result, I started holding my office hours there,” Ben admits. Ben flashes a nervous smile at Rex and Rex offers a kind one in return. “To answer your question, my connection to books and reading is only one of the reasons why I became a professor. I also have a profound love for writing.”

“Have you written anything?” Rex asks curiously.

“Yes, I have. Quite a few of my works have appeared in a couple of journals.”

“I had no idea,” Rex comments.

“It is not much to brag about, so I don't really mention it,” Ben admits with a small smile.

“You being published in journals is an accomplishment to be proud of Ben. So, do not diminish your work.” Rex levels Ben with a small glare, silently telling the man that he should not refute that statement. “Have you written any novels?” Rex asks.

“Me writing a novel is just a preposterous idea,” Ben states, turning his attention to the bookshelves. “You have a lot of books by Rako Hardeen. Is he a good writer?” Ben asks, changing the subject.

“I think he is,” Rex states, pulling Ben’s attention back to him. “One would probably even say that he is my favorite author.”

“Would you say that?” Ben asks.

“Yes,” Rex says. Rex cannot help but smile wide when he sees Ben’s smile.

“And why would you say that is?”

“Because he isn’t afraid to write about real issues. I mean he has written books where the main character is a member of the LGBTQ+ community or is a person of color. You do not see many books like that. He is also not afraid to talk about serious issues like the death penalty or abortion.”

“That sounds refreshing,” Ben states.

“It is. And many books you read nowadays are based on the same tropes. Hardeen takes those tropes and puts his own spin on them. His books always leave me wanting more.”

“That is what I like about reading so much, different authors have different takes on classic tropes,” Ben comments.

“Who is your favorite author, Ben?”

“This is a hard question, as I have read a great deal in my life. And each author I read has impacted me in some way.” Ben runs his hand through his hair before stroking his beard in contemplation. “Shakespeare is a wonderful playwright and I have enjoyed a lot of his works. He helped me get through some difficult times in my life, whether it be his plays or sonnets. So, I will have to say that he is my favorite.”

“What would you say your favorite play by him is?”

“Another hard one,”  Ben admits. He contemplates a moment before he says, “I am stuck between Much Ado About Nothing and Hamlet.”

“I haven’t read either of those,” Rex admits. Before Ben can comment, Rex asks, “Would you like some pavlova?”

“That sounds lovely. Would you like some help dishing it?” Ben asks to be polite.

“I should be all set. Would you like another glass of wine?”

“Yes please,” Ben says.

Ben is left alone with his thoughts as Rex goes to fetch the wine and pavlova. Ben’s thoughts wander to living in this space with Rex again.

Why do I keep picturing myself living here? And with Rex?

I promised myself after Satine that I would not allow myself to get attached to anyone like that again. And I have kept to that promise for so long. But then came Rex. He came into my life and for some reason I just wanted him. I want him in ways that I never wanted Satine. But most of all, I want him to stay in my life.

The scary thing is Anakin is right, I don’t know him all that well. But I am learning about him. Isn’t that how all relationships start? Yes. You need to take time to learn about each other. And I am learning about Rex, just like he is learning about me.

I am hopeful that this could lead to something that we both will enjoy, something new and beautiful. But what if it doesn’t? What if after tonight Rex realizes he just wants to be friends? Would I even want to be his friend?

“Hey,” comes Rex’s voice accompanied by a gentle hand on his shoulder. “It is alright. I am right here,” Rex shushes him. “I don’t know where you are but I need you to come back to me. Can you come back to me, sweetheart?”

Ben cannot do anything but nod. He matches his breathing to Rex’s and slowly regains his composure.

“It is alright,” he hears Rex whisper to him.

“Thanks, Rex,” Ben says shamefully.

“It is no problem. Do you want to talk about it?” Rex asks gently.

“I would prefer not to,” Ben replies.

“Then, I will not push the matter.” Rex stands and steps away from Ben. Ben already misses the warmth that Rex’s hands offered. Instead, Rex stretches and reclines on the couch.

“It has been a while since I have done this,” Ben admits after several moments of silence.

“Done what?” Rex asks.

“Dated. I forgot how nerve-racking and stressful it can be.”

“I apologize if I put any nerves or stress on you. I assure you that was not my intent,” Rex states.

“And I know that. This, what we have going for us right now, just seems to be too good to be true.”

“And why is that?” Rex asks.

“Because nothing good ever happens to me,” Ben responds.

“Good things can and do happen, Ben. What we have going for us, well, I think it is a good thing. And I am willing to give it a try if you are. Are you?”

Ben looks at Rex and sees the seriousness that the man holds within his gaze. “Yes, I want that too. But what if --

“No, don’t do that. No more what ifs, alright? I just want you to live in the moment with me. Do you think you can do that?”

“For you I would be willing to do anything,” Ben says with honesty.

“Good. And so will I,” Rex says. “Now tell me about yourself.”

“Only if you return the favor,” Ben replies.

“I will,” Rex promises, “even if we are in for a long night.” Rex smiles and settles closer to Ben.

[wonderlandleighleigh]

Hey remember that Clone Wars Episode Arc, Slaves of the Republic, where our heroes were physically and emotionally tortured and then everything was fine and it never came up ever again? 

I wrote a fic about it because I have feelings about what happened. And didn’t happen. It’s 12 pages. 

It’s under the cut.

Ahsoka gives them three days. 

Three days of solitude to put themselves back together after the Zygerrian slavery debacle. 

On the morning of the fourth day, though, neither Anakin nor Obi-Wan have emerged from their quarters, and Ahsoka decides it’s time to start worrying.

“They just need some more time,” Mace assures her when she takes it to the Council. “And rest. It was a long mission. We’ve given them a week and a half to rest and rejuvenate. That’s what they’re doing.” 

She’s dismissed, and it’s frustrating. Because she knows her masters. She knows that Anakin’s method of rejuvenation is a long speeder ride, followed by a large meal and then a nap. She knows that Obi-Wan’s is a hot shower, and then a day spent in the Temple gardens. 

None of these things have happened. And while she’d like to think that they’re just sleeping, she can feel their presences through the Force when she reaches out. They are cold, and pained. Tired and unsteady. 

“Fine,” she mutters to herself as she hops on one of the speeder bikes. “If the Council won’t help my masters, I’ll find people who will.” 

***** 

She finds both of the women she’s looking for at Padme’s office in the Senate Building, having tea together and chatting. 

When she steps in, both women rise to their feet, rushing over. 

“Oh, Ahsoka!” Padme cries, wrapping her arms around the young girl. “We were all so worried after that last mission. Are you alright?” 

Ahsoka nods, and hugs her back, a little more tightly than she means to. “I’m okay. But my masters…” she shakes her head. “I think things are very wrong.” 

Satine’s expression darkens. “Have you spoken to them?” 

“They haven’t left their quarters,” Ahsoka explains. “And neither of them would open their doors for me. Today is day four.” 

Padme’s expression turns deeply worried. “What has the Council said?” 

“That they’re resting,” Ahsoka says. “That they’re fine.” 

“Of course they did,” Satine grumbles. “Because why actually admit when things are wrong and fix them? Horrible old-” 

“We’ll follow you to the Temple in my speeder,” Padme tells Ahsoka, cutting Satine off. 

Ahsoka nods and heads out.

**** 

The three of them get strange looks as they step into the Temple. The Jedi Order does not normally entertain guests, and certainly not escorted in by a Padawan. 

Satine breaks off from Padme and Ahsoka as they enter the hallway containing the Jedi living quarters. 

“I’ll go check on Master Kenobi,” she tells them. 

Ahsoka frowns. “Wait, how do you know where Master Obi-Wan’s...room...on second thought? I’d rather not know.” 

Satine nods and disappears down the hall, as Padme then takes the lead towards Anakin’s room.

“More things I wish I didn’t know,” Ahsoka says to herself. 

Once they get to the door, Padme turns to her. “Ahsoka, please alert Master Yoda and Master Windu of our arrival. Let them know that we’ll be by to see them once we assess the Generals and their conditions.” 

Ahsoka nods, though she looks unsure. “Yes, Senator.” she says.

Once she’s gone, Padme looks one way, and then the other, before keying the security code into the keypad on the door, and slipping inside.

**** 

Down the hall, Satine does the same, squinting in the dim light of Obi-Wan quarters, looking around for any sign of him. Her eyes settle on the bed, where she can see a distinctly Obi-Wan-sized lump under the covers. 

“Oh, My Darling,” she whispers, walking over and sitting on the edge of the bed, pulling back the covers to look at him. 

His skin is pale, and he looks exhausted, his eyes shut tightly as he turns his head away from her. “Satine...I...I’m not up for visitors…” 

“I’m not here to visit, Obi-Wan,” she promises. “I am here to take care of you.” 

“I don’t need-” 

“You look like you’ve been hit by a speeder,” she tells him firmly. “When was the last time you ate something?” 

“I’ve not been hungry.” 

Satine sighs softly and reaches out to touch his face, but he puts his own hands up, blocking her. 

“Don’t touch me, please.” 

A myriad of emotions play over her face, not that Obi-Wan can see them with his eyes shut, but she settles on sadness after rage. “Why don’t you get out of bed, and take a hot shower, and then we can have a walk in the gardens. You’ve always spoken fondly of them. I’d love to see them. Then we can get you something to eat.” 

Obi-Wan hesitates, before opening his eyes just a little. “I...it does sound nice Satine, but I...I haven’t been able to sink fully into a healing trance. I’ve been trying for days. Nothing seems to work.” 

“Then perhaps this will help,” she tells him. She wants to reach out again, but doesn’t, respecing his earlier request. “Come along. Out of bed.” 

***** 

 In Anakin’s quarters, Padme sits in front of him, kneeling on the floor. He’s curled up, as small as he possibly can, in a corner of the room, and his eyes are open, but Padme knows that he can’t see or hear her. 

She’s seen her husband like this before. In times of deep stress, or if something reminds him too deeply of the abuses he suffered as a child, Anakin will, to put it bluntly, check out. 

After the first time it had happened, Padme had discreetly asked a family friend who happened to be a doctor about it. 

“It could be a form of dissociating,” they’d said. “A way for someone who has suffered traumatic experiences to protect themselves. It’s rare, but sometimes dissociation presents as catatonia.” 

At least Padme knew what was likely happening, and she’d seen Anakin snap himself out of it before, but she’d never known him to be in this state for whole days. 

“Anakin?” she asks softly, reaching out to brush a sandy curl away from his eyes. “Anakin, can you hear me?” 

She gets no response, and it breaks her heart. She’d do anything to see his eyes flicker back to life; to see his big cocky grin, or hear his voice.

“Ani,” she says, stroking his face gently. 

Still nothing. 

Padme closes her eyes tightly for a moment, before shifting over to curl up next to him, resting her head on his arm, waiting. 

And waiting. 

It’s a few hours later when Anakin stirs, and grunts softly. 

“Padme…?” 

His voice is hoarse, as though he hasn’t used it in days. He probably hasn’t. 

“Oh, my love,” she says, sitting up on her knees again, cupping his face, watching as awareness seeps back into him. “I was so worried.” 

He doesn’t respond, averting his eyes, shame behind them. “I...things went wrong on this last mission, and I-” 

“You don’t have to explain,” she tells him gently. “I heard about what happened. I know how hard this must have been.” 

“I...I’m…” 

Padme knows he wants to tell her he’s fine. She also knows he can’t. “Come on,” she says softly. “Shower, and then an actual nap, in your actual bed.” 

***** 

Later - much later - Ahsoka finds the two women outside of the Council chambers, waiting for an audience with Master Windu and Master Yoda. 

They don’t speak. They don’t say a word. The sickened look on Padme’s face, and the angered look on Satine’s say everything Ahsoka needs to know.

“Your Masters are resting peacefully now, my dear,” Satine tells her. “The rest of their leave time should go a little smoother.” 

“Anakin will want to see you in the morning,” Padme tells her, offering her a wavering smile. “He’s promised to make you breakfast.” 

Ahsoka nods, still worried. “I can escort you back to-” 

“No need,” Padme tells her. “We need to speak with Master Yoda and Master Windu.” 

“It’s not their fault,” Ahsoka says hesitantly. “If my masters needed help, they could have-” 

“My dear,” Satine says, firmly, but softly. “When one has control of an army, it is one’s responsibility to care for their soldiers.” 

Ahsoka nods, thinking that over, frowning as she recalls every time her master had checked in on a clone trooper. Every time he’d benched one, telling them they needed to rest Every time Anakin had sat down with his men to make certain they were in fighting shape. She knows Obi-Wan had acted similarly with his own men.

When she thinks of this situation in those terms, the lack of communication, the lack of well-being checks, are astounding. 

“Senator Amidala,” Mace says as the door opens. “Duchess Satine. We’re ready to see you now.” 

Ahsoka watches them go in, and wishes, not for the first time, to be a fly on the wall.

***** 

“I understand that the Jedi are still new to running an entire army,” Padme says. “But this is beyond inexcusable.” 

Both Jedi look shocked. 

“You sent two of your best generals on an incredibly dangerous mission - a mission that you were well aware would be detrimental to one of them in a deep way. You could have sent others-” 

“Yourself, said you,” Yoda interrupts. “Two of the best, they are.” 

“You could have sent backup,” Padme says. 

“It was an undercover mission,” Mace tells them. “One that was done on the fly. I don’t understand why the two of you are so incensed. Other than your obvious feelings for Skywalker and Kenobi.” 

“You do not win wars by breaking your soldiers,” Satine snaps. “Nor do you win wars by letting your personal feelings for those men color your judgement.” 

“Know not of what you speak, we do,” Yoda grumbles. 

“Oh no?” Satine asks. “So the two of you haven’t harbored deep resentment for Master Kenobi over his decision to train Skywalker. Or for Skywalker himself for daring to be here in the first place?” 

“That is not your concern,” Mace tells them uncomfortably. 

“It is my concern,” Padme snaps. “As a member of the Senate.” 

“I think you two are the ones whose judgement is clouded,” Mace tells them. “By your feelings for Generals Kenobi and Skywalker.” 

“Listen to me,” Satine says, rising to her feet. “Despite being a pacifist, I am still a Mandalorian. I know how to fight and win wars, and it is not by putting your soldiers in emotionally compromising situations to test their loyalty to your way of life. And it is not by turning a blind eye when they suffer.” 

“We do not-” 

“Obi-Wan could not attain a healing trance,” Satine cuts Mace off. “He is the best of you. Your most esteemed and respected Jedi, and he couldn’t do it because of what he’d been through. Skywalker? Your...what does Obi call him? Your chosen one? Curled up in a corner, catatonic from facing the prospect of becoming a slave once more. If ignoring their needs is how you treat the people who are on your side, and under your direction, I’d absolutely loath to see how you treat your enemies.” 

“Duchess-” 

“And the further along this war goes, the more I am reminded of how right I was to keep my people out of it,” she goes on. “You have no idea what you’re doing, and if you lose this war, and try to pass the blame to the men and women who have suffered so greatly to fight it? I will drag both of you to the senate, and have you charged with war crimes, because all four of us in this room know that this situation is just the latest in a long line of mistakes that cost lives.” 

Silence falls over the chambers, and as Satine sits down, Padme gets to her feet, looking at Mace and Yoda with sad eyes. 

“As you’re likely aware, Anakin and I are still very close,” she says. “His life before the Jedi Order was troubling at best, and horrific at its worst. Why would you put him in this situation? Why would you compromise one of your most valuable players in this war?” 

“Balance, he must learn,” Yoda tells her. “To face his past. To face his fears?” 

“On your terms,” Padme snaps. “Forcing him to face things he may not be ready to. That is not how you build someone’s character, that is how you tear them apart. Which is what I have seen happen time and time again throughout the course of this war, and not just to Anakin, but to so many of your generals. Masters, what are you doing? Why are you - and the Chancellor, for that matter - forcing people under your command, and in your care, to tear themselves apart to prove themselves to you?”

They have no answer for her, as she knew they would not.

“I’ll be staying the rest of the evening,” she tells them. “To make certain that Anakin is alright. As I know Duchess Satine will be here to check in on Obi-Wan. To do what you yourselves seem to think is unnecessary for your soldiers.” 

“Yes, so you can aid Skywalker in breaking the code more than you already have,” Mace accuses her. 

“Maybe in the face of war and death and destruction, your precious code doesn’t mean as much as you think it does,” Padme shoots back viciously. “And maybe your attachment to it will be your own downfall. Masters.” 

With that, she leaves the chambers, Satine following after her. 

***** 

Yoda doesn’t sleep that night. 

He tries, but ultimately, it’s no use. He tries meditating as well, but he receives no answers; no comfort. 

And so he wanders the Temple halls, taking comfort in the feeling through the Force of his students, but it’s hard to to take too much of that comfort when there are troubled presences down the hall. 

He thinks about the argument from that afternoon, and how harsh they had all been to each other. Senator Amidala has always been a champion of the Jedi. For her to be so adamantly against so many of their recent decisions... her concerns must be genuine, no matter what her relationship with Skywalker is.

When the Senator and the Duchess had left, Mace had been quick to point out that they do not know the Jedi ways the way they think they do. That the Jedi have done their best in what has been consistently a no-win situation. 

But knowing that two of their most successful generals had come back to them, for lack of a better word, broken, and no one had bothered to pay more attention...that Padawan Tano’s concerns had been so easily dismissed...

“Been so blind, have we?” he asks himself softly, as he steps into the gardens. “To the needs of our own?” 

He settles into the grass and gazes to the sky, watching ships move towards the stars, thinking of Senator Amidala’s words. She’d pointed out that it isn’t only the Council who have who have consistently put the Jedi in these horrific situations. 

The Chancellor. 

“Hm,” Yoda grunts to himself. 

“Master?” 

Yoda turns, finding Skywalker slowly walking out into the gardens. Even in the dim lights around them, he can tell that the young man’s skin is pale, as if he’s been sick. 

“Feeling better are you, Young Skywalker?” 

“Getting there,” Anakin tells him, shame in his voice. “I...I know that Padme said a lot of things to you-” 

“Always appreciated is the Senator’s point of view,” Yoda cuts him off. “Much to think about she gave me.” He looks up at and waves him over. “Come. Sit.” 

Anakin settles down with him in the grass, watching him curiously. 

“Hm,” Yoda muses. “Not easy, have we made things for you, hm?” 

Anakin says nothing. 

“Against your training, was I,” Yoda admits. “Worried, I was, about training someone so old. Someone with a past such as yours. Trust you, I did not.” 

He watches the younger Jedi, who still says nothing. 

“Worry for you, I still do,” Yoda tells him. “But proven yourself you have, time and again. Deserve to be in the order, you do. Despite your relationship with the senator.” 

Anakin’s eyes widen in surprise. “Master, I-” 

Yoda lifts a hand to stop him. “Get through this war, we must, in any way we can, with hearts and souls intact.” He gives a short sigh. “Difficult, this last mission was. For you and for Obi-Wan. Evident that should have been from the start. Blind, I was, to your troubles. More time to heal you both will need. Another week, you will rest.” 

“But Master-” 

“Argue, you will not,” Yoda says firmly, poking him with his walking stick. “Rest tonight, then meet me for mediation in the morning, you will.” 

“Yes...yes, Master.” 

***** 

“You have quite the champion in the Duchess,” Mace tells Obi-Wan as he settles down onto the floor of the meditation chamber. 

Obi-Wan can’t help a slight grin, his eyes still closed. “She is a very passionate woman.” 

“Do you agree with her?” Mace asks. “That the Jedi have botched this war? Have lost our way?” 

Obi-Wan’s eyes open slowly as he thinks about it. “Certainly, we’ve had our missteps. But we do our best...on the other hand...Anakin came back from this mission and promptly blacked out in a corner for three days. So we may want to reconsider some of our methods.” 

“Are we certain that’s the truth?” 

“Are you insinuating that my former apprentice lied about having a traumatic episode?” Obi-Wan asks, clearly puzzled. “You honestly trust Anakin so little that you think he would do that?” 

“I don’t trust the Chancellor,” Mace corrects him. “And he has Skywalker in his pocket.” 

“Anakin is one of us,” Obi-Wan insists. “And if you distrust the Chancellor so much, then you know where your energies should be directed.” He closes his eyes again. “If you’re truly concerned with the Chancellor’s actions and motives, then I will help you look into it.” 

Mace stays quiet for a moment before responding. “I will take you up on that.” He goes silent again for a moment before tilting his head at the younger man. “Are you feeling better?” 

“I am getting there,” Obi-Wan tells him. “At the very least, I’m now able to achieve a healing trance, which has helped immensely.” 

“...Because of the Duchess.” 

“Because there was someone who cared enough to worry about my well-being,” Obi-Wan corrects him. “Ahsoka came to the Council for guidance, and when that failed, she went to the Duchess and the Senator. She saved Anakin and I from a much grimmer healing process from all of this. I’m very grateful to her.” 

Mace snorts softly. “That was a very good side-step.” 

“Yes, I’m rather proud of it, myself.” 

***** 

“What did you say to Yoda, exactly?” 

Padme shrugs daintily as she smooths out her dress a couple of days later. She’d stayed the night at the Temple, and so had Satine, she knew, to make certain Anakin and Obi-Wan were in good enough shape to manage on their own.

“I...may have pointed out a few things to him and Master Windu that they may have...missed,” she tells Anakin innocently as she turns to him. “It’s up to them what they do with that.” 

“Uh-huh,” he nods, watching her as she gets ready to leave. He reaches out, taking her hand, holding it gently. “Thank you for being here. If you hadn’t come, I might still be curled up in the corner.” 

Padme strokes his hair gently. “You should thank Ahsoka. She came and got us.” 

Anakin nods and wraps his arms around her, holding her tightly. “I’ll be here an extra week. I’ll try to come see you.” 

She smiles and leans up, kissing him gently. “Rest, Ani.” 

“I rest easier with you,” He admits, not letting her go quite yet. 

Padme closes her eyes, and holds him just as tightly.

**** 

“You could stay a little longer,” Obi-Wan comments. “I wouldn’t mind.” 

Satine gives a soft laugh as they walk arm-in-arm to the front doors of the Temple. “I’m well aware, My Darling. But I have responsibilities elsewhere, and you have more healing to do.” 

“I suppose you’re right.” 

“Funny, how often that’s the case,” she teases him as they stop in front of the doors. “You will comm me later to let me know how you are doing. If the Council give you any problems, I want you to inform me right away, and I’ll-” 

“Come to the rescue, yes I know,” Obi-Wan chuckles. “But I’ll be fine. Both Anakin and I will be fine. And hopefully the next time I see you, it will be under much happier circumstances.” 

She takes a breath and nods, taking his hands and holding them tightly. “I worry about you. You know I do.” 

“Yes.” 

“And this incident, with slavers…” 

“Was not one I will soon forget,” Obi-Wan admits. “But one I can cope with. Because I have good friends to help me.” 

“Yes,” she says softly. “Friends.” 

Obi-Wan strokes her jaw gently and leans in, kissing her cheek. “I promise to contact you tonight with an update.” 

Satine nods. “Good. Then we’ll talk later.” 

He watches her leave and takes a deep breath, wishing he could say more (as he always does when Satine is around). 

When he turns to go back to his quarters, he finds Anakin and Ahsoka standing behind him, waiting for him. 

“Hello, Master Obi-Wan,” Ahsoka grins. “I’m glad you’re feeling better.” 

“Yes, and it’s all thanks to you,”

“I...I didn’t-” 

“You did,” Anakin interrupts her. “You went to the Council, and then went to Padme and Satine when that didn’t pan out. So I think we owe you.” 

“Yes, I agree,” Obi-Wan nods, stroking his beard. 

“Maybe...milkshakes at Dex’s?” Ahsoka asks hopefully. “For a month?” 

Anakin laughs and nudges her with an elbow. “Let’s start with today, and go from there.” 

She smiles at them, glad to him them back, at least at partial-strength. “Deal.” 

END.

[shierak-inavva]

please ma'am i would like to know more about this 'obi wan gets sent to protect padme' au pls 👀

ok

ok so like, i’ve talked about this on twitter and i am gonna bring it here:

basically, my biggest gripe with the AOTC plot is why in the heck did a PADAWAN get sent on a high profile mission like protecting former queen and senator from naboo Padmé Amidala? even palpatine, at the beginning of the movie, mentions ‘master kenobi’ by name as a suggestion for a guard for padmé (and yes we know why, but still) so i went ahead and imagined a ‘what if’ for obi-wan getting sent instead of anakin—since on top of being a ‘familiar’ face that padmé AND her handmaidens trust and who already is a known name on naboo, obi-wan also already has bodyguarding experience under his belt.

now, factoring in that anakin stays at the temple for a bit and obi-wan DOES get like 3 days of vacation for the first time in....his life....then he gets a few days of just actually RESTING--in varykino, of all places, and with padme, who would literally let him rest anyway. so obi-wan gets a mini vacay. he gets to relax in one of the most beautiful places in the galaxy and padmé does, too--they talk about the battle of theed, about the senate, the jedi, about qui-gon, and for a little while obi-wan and padmé both get to just...breathe, and be...people. which is nice, and which tbqfh they both deserve.

there might not be a floating pear at dinner but there would be padmé watching him go through lightsaber forms in the early morning sun (either shirtless or yknow in some light clothes because fuck you i said so)

there's no balcony kiss, but there are some very lingering glances and smiles when the other isn't looking and some 'accidental' hand brushing...because they would ABSOLUTELY be slow-burn. obi-wan and padmé are both adults at this point, and both of them have obligations, obi-wan even moreso. but he's already known what attraction (physical and emotional) is like, what romantic emotions are like--he's not incapable of these things, he’s just reserved about them because he understands them, but his jedi teachings dictate restraint, and release. satine was still a figure in his life--he just made a choice, in the end, and do i think he regrets it? i think here and there he thinks about it, but i don’t think he fully feels regret over it by the time AOTC takes place. i think that comes later, when he sees her again during the clone wars.

now on naboo with padmé, he's faced with the same sort of emotions blooming up, and he would for sure think to himself about the choice with satine, about the jedi order, and about the repercussions there. so he might let himself get a little closer than he ought to, but ultimately nothing really WILD AND OVERT would come of it in AOTC, even if they'd been alone on naboo. there would be some very close calls, i think, for sure, but both of them are very good at keeping themselves guarded and very good at abstaining when necessary. again, these are two grown adults that have lived both of their lives with expectations weighing on them, and a certain behavior and standard expected of them. they aren’t two horny teenagers with nothing to lose and obi-wan would 100% respect padmé’s boundaries without hesitation while she would offer him the same respect, if maybe not so staunchly. padmé is for sure more flexible with her boundaries, but pair the two of them together flirting....i mean that’s a dangerous amount of chemistry right off the bat 👀

meanwhile anakin would be on coruscant and FRUSTRATED. not because he didn't get the assignment, though that would be part of it--the responsibility aspect—no, because they chose someone else to go protect padmé instead of him. hell, they could have sent mace windu and he'd still be frustrated and jealous as all fuck. but he still does as he's told. he just...looks into the dart. checks in more on the bounty hunter aspect of things because he’s SURE that’s a good lead after the zam situation. he's determined to prove himself, and if he can figure out who's trying to hurt padmé then she'll be impressed too, of course. and he wants that. a lot. obi-wan might have been sent to naboo but at this point anakin:

> is still VERY infatuated with padmé

> does not know about obi-wan’s romantic history and likely would assume he’s just boring her to death/that nothing would happen anyways

but instead of just consulting the council or the archives, anakin goes to palpatine.

palpatine offers NO help with the bounty hunter stuff.

but he DOES sow more seeds of jealousy in anakin's horny teen brain, and in the end anakin ends up jetting off of coruscant on his own. the movies just downplayed the everloving heck out of this but you KNOW palps was in anakin’s ear CONSTANTLY about obi-wan and padmé, stirring the pot.

now, anakin doesn't have the contacts that obi-wan does, but he's determined. i'm thinking he probably susses a few things out about the dart via the force; possibly with help from another master. kit? someone would help him focus if he asked. likely kit, or ki-adi, or plo, imo—he gets enough to at least send him looking for a bounty hunter and possibly towards kamino--but then the stuff with his mother comes up.

and he ends up on tattooine, with the lars family.

and shortly after the Sand People Incident™ is when he gets in contact with obi-wan--and padmé insists on seeing what's going on because she senses something is wrong and obi-wan agrees. (you can pry force sensitive!padmé from my cold dead hands) so anakin meets them at the lars homestead, tells them about his visions with the dart, about the bounty hunter and the feelings he got

and what better place than mos eisley to look for someone Seedy?

mos eisley has them run right into jango.

jango leads them to geonosis.

geonosis gets them all caught.

padmé is the one who sends a message to the jedi council about the geonosians and jango fett before she gets captured too--because you know they told her to stay with the ship while they investigate but then they took too long and she was like 'oh boy i better call the cops'.

the arena plays out like it did in AOTC, minus the secret kiss & love declaration. there’s a lot of ‘how did we get into this mess’ and ‘well you two took too long’ and ‘i told you i should have come in as a senator first’ and anakin trying to be very convincingly brave about ‘i’ll get us out of this’ which is aimed directly at padmé. honestly the rest of the movie would be VERY similar; i think whoever assisted anakin with the dart would wind up on kamino when anakin went to tattooine, and from there things progressed with the clones and the army gets to the republic.

but there's no clandestine wedding.

anakin returns to coruscant with the other masters, commended for his work helping the senator and with the dart. obi-wan and padmé likely have a small 'meeting' scene where she thanks him and he tells her he barely did anything—but there's some hand-touching, and some very meaningful looks, and they do kiss, just once. it's soft and quiet and not under the pressure of possibly dying or anything rushed by adrenaline or hormones, it's just a gentle kiss between two people who've had this building up for weeks; and in the end neither one of them apologize, but there's A LOT of body language that says they're into it and would kiss again--but obi-wan steps back, and padmé just smiles, and there's a shared understanding between them even if it's clear there's some amount of wistfulness.

“i hope your trip back to coruscant is safe, master kenobi," she smiles like nothing's just happened, nothing's different.

"and yours, senator amidala. may the force be with you." and he bows, smiling back.

but they do look back at each other again, and everything is different.

and then you get into TCW—and PLEASE imagine all of the tension there because these two AREN’T married, they ARE sneaking around but only a little; obi-wan isn’t near as brazen with things as anakin and he and padmé get enough time together in the first few seasons to really build some THICK tension between them. like i’m talking dangerous rescue missions, them having to fight their way out together, getting smooshed in tight spaces together, S O M U C H accidental touching, SO MANY almost-kisses....and then there’s the clovis stuff, which would play out way differently because obi-wan isn’t the jealous type at all and would absolutely trust padmé; and then satine shows up again and we get a whole arc of obi-wan dealing with these conflicting emotions and padmé coming very close on multiple occasions to just telling him she loves him but! supporting his decision no matter what and respecting his emotions, because she understands, and because she knows love is selfless and not possessive and she wants to be with him...if that’s what he wants, too.

but then satine dies—and she worries about him once he's back from mandalore, and there is possibly some very gentle and sweet comforting for the audience to enjoy 👀 the big season finale after that is maul holding padmé and another senator or two hostage and it's an ultra close call but maul dips out, bc it was just bait—and the season ends with him admitting as clearly as he can in Obi-Wan Terms™ that he loves her and padmé reciprocating. they kiss and it's very sweeping and dramatic, but now maul knows kenobi has yet another weakness uh oh...

anyways honestly all of this leads to ROTS being about anakin dealing with the jealousy that palpatine’s been feeding into: jealousy towards obi-wan about padmé, and about being overshadowed. it’s about anakin feeling like he can never have enough, about wanting more and more, about obsessive love and doubt—and when it turns out padmé is pregnant, anakin’s suspicions get confirmed and he turns to palpatine yet again.

IDEALLY padmé survives this movie and she and obi-wan go into hiding together with the twins, (or their child? i mean this is for sure up to interpretation for this specific au) and anakin/vader combs the galaxy for them, resulting eventually in padmé’s death and the separation of the twins, and giving some actual meaning to leia remembering her mother in ROTJ.

so yeah i just. have a lot of feelings about things and at any given moment i can and will talk your ear off about ‘what if’ scenarios like this hdkdjdk 😭💦

[tennessoui]

hi all of your aus are amazing! pls what happens with divorced!obiwan and the twins?

hey!! sorry this took so long i had to think of an appropriate cliffhanger

this is a continuation of this ficlet and this ficlet, where divorced!obi-wan accidentally acquires a partner and a set of twins.

(2k WHOOPS)

The twins are not, and probably have never been described by anyone except their father, angels. They take to Obi-Wan as well as Obi-Wan takes to them, which is to say that all three of them watch each other suspiciously until one day Luke launches himself off the top of the fridge--how the fuck did he manage to get up there--and Obi-Wan drops his morning toast in a frantic bid to catch him.

After that, Leia and Luke apparently decide he is Another Anakin Who Is Just Around A Lot Less But Is Better At Reading Bedtime Stories and deign to treat him as such.

Obi-Wan decides that he’s going to have a heart attack by the age of fifty. Do all children see a childproof house as a challenge?

It somehow takes both a longer and shorter time to win over Anakin’s favor, mostly because Obi-Wan isn’t sure what the man’s thinking at any given moment. He seems to blow hot and cold depending on how he woke up or how the work day goes. Some days, Obi-Wan comes home from campus and Anakin and the twins have waited to eat until he’s there. Sometimes they’ve eaten and there’s a meal under foil on the stove just for Obi-Wan.

(“I don’t know how you do it,” Obi-Wan tells him one night after the children are put to bed. “I mean, work from home with your job, mind the children, and cook?”

“They made me head of the R&D department a few months ago,” Anakin admits, taking a sip of his second glass of wine. “So I’m doing a lot more checking through other people’s work instead of making my own. It just means I can do that and make something edible--no, really, you just can’t cook, Obi-Wan, I’m not the best either.”

“Do you miss getting to make something other than food?” Obi-Wan asks eventually, giving himself enough time to recover from the sound of the other’s giggles.

Anakin shrugs languidly. “It’s better salary, and I’m the youngest ever in the company to have the position. Means I’ll pay off my student loans quicker, same with my mom’s hospital bills. Doesn’t matter what I want.”

Obi-Wan’s chest hurts and he wants to lean across the gap between their chairs and place his hand on Anakin’s arm, but they don’t know each other like that. It’s only been a month and a half since they moved in. Still. “It always matters what you want,” he insists. “And I think you’re amazing.”

Anakin blushes bright scarlet and takes a huge gulp of wine, and Obi-Wan wonders if this is a throwing-yourself-off-the-fridge break through.)

(It’s not because the next day, Anakin doesn’t say a single word to him, which bothers him more than he’d like to admit.)

(“Am I in the wrong for wanting to get along with my housemate?” Obi-Wan asks Quinlan despairingly during their office hours that he should be using to grade papers. Instead all he can think about is Anakin Skywalker and the goddamn cold shoulder he’s been getting from the man for the past three days.

“Yeah,” Quin says absentmindedly, marking something with a red pen before looking up at Obi-Wan’s outraged intake of breath. “I mean, no. I mean, sorry, Obi, what are we even talking about now? Is it still your hot new roommate with the two kids? Because that’s what we were talking about an hour and a half ago.”

Obi-Wan crosses his arms and leans back in his chair. “I’m just not sure I appreciate--”

“And you said he’s not been hanging around in the living room when you get home? But he’s still leaving you meals in the kitchen? And you’re upset about the free food?”

Obi-Wan is upset at the lack of Anakin’s presence, but he thinks that’s probably not the right thing to say here.

“Maybe he’s just tired?” Quinlan puts down his pen and rests his chin on one of his hands as he looks at Obi-Wan. “From the kids and the job and putting up with your moody ass. C’mon, Obi, what’s really getting you worked up?”

Obi-Wan purses his lips and stares at the desk in front of him, but he had come to Quinlan for help. He should at least be honest about what’s eating at him, even though he knows how silly it will sound when given a voice. “...Satine always waited up for me,” he mutters. “Until she didn’t.”

Quinlan’s quiet for a worryingly large amount of seconds, before he reaches out to pat Obi-Wan gently on the arm. “Oh, Obi,” he says pityingly. “Repeat after me. You cannot make your new roommate your rebound from your thirty year marriage.”

Obi-Wan scoffs. That’s not the problem at all. “That’s not the problem at all,” he says, not defensively in the slightest. “I think I’m just worried about the children not having enough structure in their lives.”

“Right,” Quinlan says, not quite managing to hide the skepticism in his voice. “Then you should talk to him. For the sake of the children.”

Obi-Wan will absolutely not be doing that, but it’s a nice thought.)

The real turning point in Anakin and Obi-Wan’s relationship happens five months after the Skywalkers move in.

Anakin and Obi-Wan are in the living room. Anakin is trying to braid Leia’s hair while Obi-Wan tries to pretend he isn’t watching. From the kitchen, there’s a very, very loud crash and the sound of something shattering.

Both adults leap up from their seats immediately and run to the other room.

Luke is standing in the epi-center of disaster, little face scrunched up like he doesn’t know whether or not to cry. At the sight of his dad and Obi-Wan, he starts to wail, moving forward and reaching for Anakin.

Obi-Wan, who is wearing shoes inside the house (a point of contention between himself and Anakin), grabs Luke roughly and picks him up by the armpits before he can cut his feet on the glass. He hands him over to Anakin to soothe, stepping further into the kitchen to find the dustpan he keeps in one of the pantries.

It’s very obvious what broke, though Obi-Wan can’t for the life of him understand how Luke got ahold of Satine’s heavy cake stand. He can definitely understand how Luke dropped it, as the thing was ridiculously heavy.

It had been one of the only things left in the house that had been Satine’s. She’d left it, and Obi-Wan had been too bitter or petty to point it out to her. Yes, it had been her mother’s. No, keeping it had not made him feel any better. But it’s not like Satine ever baked anything anyway.

Good for Luke, actually, for doing what Obi-Wan never could bring himself to do.

He grabs the broom and dustpan and marches back to the pieces of shattered glass. Anakin has placed Luke on the counter, ostensibly to check to make sure his feet are fine if the boy would ever let go of his father’s neck. Leia is peering around at the mess on the floor.

When Obi-Wan comes back and starts sweeping everything away, she darts forward to pick up a rather sizeable chunk.

“Don’t touch that,” Obi-Wan says sharply, much harsher than he intended. Leia drops it instantly and scurries back to her father, eyes wide and sort of watery. Oh, fuck.

“Hey,” Anakin snaps immediately. “She’s just trying to help and Luke didn’t mean to break--whatever that is.”

Obi-Wan holds up his hand to cut Anakin off. “I’m not mad,” he promises all three of the Skywalkers. And he’s not even lying. He’s really not mad, hasn’t even thought to be mad at this last piece of proof of his relationship with Satine shattering on his kitchen floor. “I just don’t want either of you to cut yourself. Glass like this can be very dangerous and none of you are wearing shoes.”

“Promise?” Luke asks, untucking his red face from Anakin’s neck so he can peer up at Obi-Wan.

“I’m sorry I was a bit rough,” Obi-Wan apologizes, coming over and bending down a bit so he’s on the same level as Luke. “I was just worried about you. Promise.”

Luke sniffles but lets go of Anakin to throw himself at Obi-Wan, apologizing all the way.

“Hush,” Obi-Wan says as Leia scrambles up his leg, vying for his attention. With his hands full of children that aren’t his, he raises his head to look at Anakin who’s watching them with a very strange expression on his face. He tilts his head toward the broom and then down to the kids in his arms. “Come along,” he tells them both. “Leia, I’ll finish your braids if you’d like.”

“Braid my hair too!” Luke demands with a pull on Obi-Wan’s shirt.

Luke’s hair is floppy but awfully short. “I’m sure we can figure something out,” Obi-Wan says generously, leaving the kitchen.

“I suppose I’ll just clean this up then?” Anakin calls sarcastically behind them.

“Thank you, darling,” Obi-Wan responds.

There’s the sound of something else breaking, but it’s not Obi-Wan’s problem at the moment.

(A year later, Anakin mentions something over morning coffee about looking for a new apartment, now that he’s got everything straightened out. “We’ll get out of your hair,” he says, rubbing at the back of his neck. “I’ll look today since it’s my day off.”

Obi-Wan doesn’t want to examine why that idea makes something curl tightly in his stomach, making him feel vaguely nauseous, but it does. On his way out of the house, he unplugs the router, and then after a second of thought, takes it with him just in case.)

(Quinlan laughs his head off when Obi-Wan sheepishly puts the router down on the desk in front of him. “It’s a bad market right now,” Obi-Wan says defensively. “I’m just looking out for him.”

“Obi, I mean this in the best way possible, but there are at least four professors in the psych department that would probably love to do a case study on you.”)

(Two years after the Skywalkers move in, Obi-Wan is running late for a meeting with the head of his department. The man is stepping down, finally retiring, and Obi-Wan thinks that perhaps he’ll be tapped as the new head. It would mean dropping some of his classes, but it would be worth it.

“I made you a breakfast wrap,” Anakin greets him at the door, holding out a paper bag. “It’s got that salsa you like in it.”

The salsa Obi-Wan likes is the mild version of what Anakin and the kids eat, but Anakin treats it as if it’s from another planet entirely.

“Good luck!” he says with a sweet smile, also passing Obi-Wan a travel mug of what’s hopefully fully caffeinated tea. Obviously Obi-Wan needs it. He got perhaps two full hours of sleep last night, tossing and turning and thinking about this meeting and now he’s running late and his tie is crooked and none of his favorite sweater vests were clean.

“Thank you, dear one,” Obi-Wan mumbles, mind somewhere else. If traffic isn’t too bad, he could still be on time.

“Text me how it goes!” Anakin chirps, following Obi-Wan out the door to stand on the front porch with his arms crossed in an attempt to fight off the early winter chill.

“Yes, of course,” Obi-Wan replies, turning around to brush an absent-minded kiss to Anakin’s lips before hurrying to his car. It’s a twenty minute commute. If he gets his preferred parking spot and runs to the department building, he won’t be late at all.

Is that too much to hope for?

He starts the car and pulls out of the driveway, looking back in the rearview mirror to see Anakin standing frozen on the porch. That’s strange, usually the other man can’t stand being out in the cold.

Obi-Wan gets to the first stop-sign out of the neighborhood before he realizes what he’s done. It’s lucky that he’s already slowing down, because he slams on the brakes. Did he--

Did he kiss Anakin? Did he really kiss Anakin as if he does it all the time? As if they were in a relationship?

Oh shit.

Frantically, he pulls out his cellphone from his bag and checks to see if he has any new messages. He doesn’t.

Oh. Shit.

[legobiwan]

Whumptober #5

“on the run”

Notes: Yes, I’m a day behind, I’m hoping to post a second story tonight but let’s see where life goes. This story...I started out with an idea, and then that idea went in a very different direction as I started writing. RotS AU.

General Whumptober tag

Whumptober 2020 #1

Whumptober 2020 #2

Whumptober 2020 #3

Whumptober 2020 #4

~~~~~~

If you were here, Qui-gon…

Right. If you were here you’d probably shackle me up - wrists tightly enclosed in Force-dampening binders, restraining collar around my neck. Your harsh words would be an invisible whip against my true skin, your touch too soft for a monster such as I, pleading almost, far too kind than what I deserve for my crimes.

You would do all this, Qui-gon, your eyes dark with disappointment, letting no other man or soldier or droid handle me except yourself. Your failure of a Padawan trussed up like a common criminal (common? Perhaps not.), signed, sealed, and delivered personally back to Coruscant for my trial and probable execution.

And you would be right to do so, Qui-gon. So, so right. Force, part of me wishes you could swoop down right now, take me in your arms, the last friendly touch I would ever know before you placed my body on the electroguillotine’s platform to the cheers of the Senate, to the stony facades of the Jedi Council. One last bit of kindness, your hand on my cheek, before the killing blade would deliver me from my sins, before this would all just be over.

After all, it’s not every day a member of the Jedi High Council assassinates the Chancellor of the Republic on live holofeed.

Their faces Qui-gon, the way the Force shifted like two ancient, tectonic masses, colliding as Palaptine - or should I say Sidious - fell from his lofty perch, body plunging, down, down, down until it hit the subterranean floor of the Senate chamber with a sickening, exhilarating thud.

The similarities to my subterfuge as Rako Hardeen were not unmarked, believe me, Qui-gon. Palpatine, however, unlike myself, continues to be dead, two neat holes placed through the side of his treacherous head.

I feel, perhaps, that I have forsaken myself.

But you weren’t there, Master, you didn’t watch through thin slits of wavering consciousness, of azure and crimson rainbows, of the sneaking tar of decay that oozed forth from the man who would lead - would conquer - the Republic and the Jedi. You weren’t there as your Padawan - your friend and brother, the boy you so cared for (more than myself, I can now admit). As Anakin brought the two blades together at Dooku’s neck, executioner of a death sentence signed in familiar large, looping letters - “Sheev Palpatine, Chancellor of the Republic.”

It was him, Qui-gon. The Sith Lord was right there, the entire time, one hand on Anakin’s shoulder, leading him to perdition.

And I did nothing to stop it.

Nothing, until now.

Perhaps if I had been the one to perish on Naboo…perhaps none of this would have ever happened. But that is another world lost to another time, and the ‘here and now,’ as you would say, consists of a cold storage closet in the rear of a Rodian smuggler’s ship.

Three days I’ve been cramped in this space, my passage paid with the frozen Twi’lek guard lying at my feet, legs bent at unnatural, backward angles, the trickle of blood dripping from their nose now an ugly, improvised tattoo.

It’s cold, Qui-gon. A blessing, in some ways, as my departed friend here is unlikely to suffer the worst effects of putrefaction, but I feel even if I were to be on the sunny beaches of Scarif, I would still shiver at my own conscience.

I am tired, Qui-gon.

~~~

You visited me in my dreams last night, Qui-gon.

Neither the avenging angel of death nor the soft shepherd of comfort, you stood, distant, enigmatic as a Loth-Sphinx, as distant and maddening as you had been in life.

I suppose this should have come as no surprise.

Why? You asked me.

Why what, Qui-gon? Why did I kill Palpatine, why did I run, why did I make a fool’s promise to you all those years ago?

As to the last question, I believe - well, perhaps not believe, but fervently hope - you know the answer already.

To answer the others - what choice did I have? To witness what I had, to know Anakin was in thrall to this…this thing, that I would never convince him of Palpatine’s true intentions, that I had lost any trust, any esteem he may have still had for me with my own betrayals -

It was all happening too fast, Qui-gon. The situation on Mandalore, the battle on Coruscant, Dooku’s death. I briefly confided in Bail Organa, the Senator from Alderaan, hinted at my actions in regards to the Mandalore situation, on the way to Coruscant. He told me in no uncertain terms that the Senate would be forced to bring down charges of insurrection, even possibly treason, once they learned of my manipulations of the GAR.

What was one more charge, on top of the others, I thought.

It…it’s better this way, Qui-gon. The Jedi, while still under suspicion, have an obvious and convenient scapegoat, a Council member gone rogue, the underground actor fanning the flames of rumors of a coup. Anakin, while unstable, is at least now out of his orbit. Whether he stays in the Order or leaves, I cannot say, but I hope for his sake - and his unborn child’s - he leaves.

Don’t you see, Qui-gon? The only one who must suffer here is me and I will do so gladly.

Ah, but why not turn myself in, you ask. The deed is done, why run from my actions?

The Twi’lek’s crimson lividity has given way to a more pale ochre, abdomen swollen and nauseated. While the cold has stalled this inevitable process, I must confess to being a bit wary of my companion’s stability.

One more night, and we shall reach Mandalore.

I remain here, discomfited bunkmate to the dead, while Cody and his men span the galaxy, hunting for the wayward Jedi - the turncoat, the traitor, the aruetii…

But you see, Qui-gon, as the galaxy turns its eye on me, it distances its gaze from the Order, from the Council’s machinations.

If I had not acted, someone else would have - with far more dire consequences, I fear.

We spoke of it, you know. Taking over the government, stripping Palpatine of his power (and how laughable a notion that is, to strip a Sith Lord of their edged fury. Impossible to achieve without bloodshed.) It’s not that we wanted to usurp the government - even within the Council itself, there was strong dissent to even considering this notion.

Mace would have gladly fallen on his lightsaber to see justice served. As would Kit. And Plo. And possibly Master Yoda.

But their souls were clean.

Mine, on the other hand…

It’s late Qui-gon, and I fear tomorrow will be an unpleasant day.

~~~

You once said, Qui-gon, that upon finding a confluence of paths, there is no correct direction, that, in the end, there was only a decision, and the consequences thereof.

I find myself in such a place.

It seems the news of my actions reached Mandalore before I did, the civil war now at an uneasy pause, Maul neutered (and what does that say about me, that I could not achieve this victory when Ahsoka could? Perhaps I am too close, too near that fault line to act as she could.)

But they do not know, Qui-gon, what I do. Ahsoka may look on in muted fury, Rex dipping his head as he comms Cody, his only words a soft we have him, Bo-Katan radiant with indignation - why could you have not done this before?

Before we both lost her, before Satine’s legacy was burnt to the ground, before it came to this.

They wrap me in cords and shackles and the best Jedi restraints Mandalore has to offer, dumping me in the same containment cell as him, who takes one look at my sorry state, who knows what sins are written on my soul.

Maul throws back his head, and cackles, the sound of a hundred broken mirrors.

They only have one, he says.

He doesn’t need to explain further.

The Mandalorian sarcophagus. We both saw it, that first time on Mandalore, Satine’s cheeks turning pink, then red, as she explained the true purpose of the monstrous devices.

We would never use them now, she said. There’s no need.

We can only hope, you answered.

And now, it is a question of who is the greater monster - the being born of blood and violence, or the one who accepted it into his heart.

He would have been his new apprentice, Maul drawls, with a sick smile.

I know, I answer. I do know, don’t I? Knew this entire time and yet could do nothing to stop it - until now.

Will you accept your fate, Kenobi? Be hauled back to Coruscant in chains, your allies grinning as your head falls from the blade?

I should. Damnit, I should, Qui-gon! I am a Jedi, I do not fear death, for there is only the Force.

And yet…

~~~

We are leaving, Qui-gon, Maul and I. To what end, I cannot say. Do not fear for me, Master of mine. I am long corrupted, past redemption in this life and can only hope to use my darkness for an ultimate good.

There is much to be done.

May I feel your soft hand on my cheek one more time, Qui-gon, if only in my dreams.

Please forgive me.

I am sorry.

Yours in this life and the next,

Obi-wan Kenobi.

[jasontoddiefor]

So I was reading your Mandalorian Anakin AU, and I have a few questions that I hope you won’t mind answering. 1, does Anakin or Shmi every go by Fett? 2, what does Anakin think of Satine since she’s a pacifist. And 3 what does Satine think of the mandalorion Jedi? Ps this is one of my favorite AU’s you’ve written! I love all of your AU’s though

I don’t mind answering at all!!! I live to ramble about my AUs hahaha! TW for Anakin’s Terrible Childhood In Slavery.

1) Names Shmi and Anakin will continue to go by Skywalker with Fett being the name they allow their friends/family to use. Shmi grew up in a culture that highly values secrecy and the names you gave yourself/are your own and your Master can’t take away from you. Anakin was born into that culture. They grew in diaspora when it comes to the Mandalorian side. And after so many years, even after they freed themselves, introducing themselves as Skywalker will always be the first instinct and more comfortable to them.

This got way too long so here we go:

2) Anakin’s thoughts on Satine Oh boy. You’re asking the difficult questions. On one hand, Anakin probably admires that she wants to keep the peace. Mandalore went through a bloody Civil War with many dead and tortured and hurt. You don’t want that to happen again. And Jedi are peacekeepers. They want to make the galaxy a better place to live in. On the other hand, Anakin, again, grew up on a world that can’t be helped with Satine’s pacifism. Of course, you also can’t just barge in with an army to free all slaves because Tatooine is not an isolated planet. The Hutts certainly won’t take it lying down even if just a small part of their syndicate goes down. But still, even the Jedi, peacekeepers, are armed with a lightsaber. And true evil, honestly not even mediocre evil, does not go down without a fight. Again, I imagine that Anakin’s childhood was rather bloody. He was beaten and abused, around him people died or were blown up. This is not just one part of his life, that was his entire childhood up until he was almost 10. Of course he wants peace and I imagine, also wishes he wouldn’t have to fight for such high stakes as sentient life. But Anakin was intimately aware with the concept of fighting being the only option he had. Pacifism as an ideal is nice, but it doesn’t measure up to the life he has lived. Like that whole “cold-blooded killer” deal in  S02E13 Voyage of Temptation. Anakin wouldn’t get how Satine (given, that it is not trauma alone making her shaky wielding a weapon) wouldn’t immediately shoot the guy. What are ideals compared to a life?

And then there’s Jango of course once he turns 14. Not entirely sure yet where I’ll stick Satine timeline-wise, but - while Jango does need some proper ass-kicking to step up again for the people he abandoned - but I don’t see Jango agreeing with Satine’s stance either. And he takes up most of Anakin’s Mandalorian education. And Anakin gets raised on Resol’nare as well as his mother remembered it. Ara'nov, self-defense, has a very broad definition, especially if you consider how important family is. How far does that extend in Anakin’s mind?

So bottom line, don’t get the started arguing because I could probably write a thesis on it.

3) Satine’s thoughts on Anakin Equally complicated. On one hand she’d absolutely be happy to teach him bits of their culture, on the other, they clash a lot. I think that on a political level she’d also at first be glad about a visible sign of the fights between Jedi and Mandalorians being over, on the other. Well, back to that Jango Fett sized impact because what you do end up seeing is a Jedi in freaking beskar. Like, Anakin is genuinely the horror of some people. Imagine all that Jedi as super human warrior rhetoric + the general impression the galaxy has of Mandalorians. And now you have one package deal. Anakin is an intimidating picture and not exactly one that promotes peace but why exactly it was good there hasn’t been a Mandalorian Jedi in ages because that crazy strong kid is the result. I imagine she’d at least once bring up how he can consider himself a peacekeeping Jedi and embrace True Mandalorian values at the same time.

So both of them do respect each other as people, get along for Obi-Wan’s sake and probably also make fun of him together, but politics and philosophy are difficult. Anakin is balancing 3 different ones already and Satine’s Mandalore is not the one tiny Anakin Skywalker imagined coming to save him when Watto decided he was displeased with him. 

I hope this answered your questions?

[underworldobsessed]

I Have Loved You for a Thousand Years ll An Obitine Fanfic

Name: I Have Loved You for a Thousand Years Rating: T Ship: Obi-Wan Kenobi/Satine Kryze Characters: Obi-Wan Kenobi, Satine Kryze,  Series: ABO Obitine (Part 2 out of ???) Summary:  Despite being mated, Obi-Wan and Satine haven't seen each other since that fateful Year on the Run. When Satine sees him again, she thinks that maybe she can have her mate for a little while, but they have been at each others throats. Perhaps, their time as mates was destined to be short lived. Authors Note: Once I started this, I couldn’t stop. These two have consumed my soul and I’ve been in love with this. Honestly, this universe is actually really awesome to dive into and I love it.  Read here or under the cut

“The sarcasm of a soldier!”

“The delusions of a dreamer!”

Of all the ways she thought she would reunite with Obi-Wan, this was not it. The man who she marked, her omega… was there in front of her and they were at each other’s throats. They had almost rekindled what they had before until he opened his mouth and basically told her she had no choice but to pick a side and join a war where she intended to keep Mandalore decidedly neutral. Her anger was mildly eased, though not by much, when she saw his eyes drift to where she knew her mating mark was hidden underneath her gown. She didn’t entirely process everything being said, knowing that something was mentioned about waiting until after dinner, making her own remark before pushing her way through to exit the room, her shoulder slamming against Obi-Wan’s as she left.

Emotions, complicated and mixed, swirled within her and almost made her sick. When Obi-Wan had come to investigate Death Watch, she thought that maybe they had a chance to rekindle something… but then he opened his mouth and she remembered that he was not the same man she mated with. He was a general in a war, and probably didn’t even remember what he felt for her.

She knew she had some time until dinner, so maybe until then she could try and settle her stomach so maybe she could at least eat something. She made her way to her room and sat down on her bed, burying her face in her hands. She knew her actions were unbecoming of both a duchess and an alpha, but she couldn’t bring herself to care when she was in the safety of her private quarters.

Tears rolled down her face, all the built up hurt and anguish of growing apart from her mate. She thought that she had gotten over it, that their years-long separation would have dulled her feelings towards him, but looking at him again and spending time with him reminded her of just how much she loved him. Reminded her of why she let him mark her that night during their time on the run. She unzipped a bit of her dress and moved the neckline so she was able to look at the red mark at the joint between her neck and her shoulder. Her fingers moved to brush against it, and she squeezed her eyes shut. It wasn’t right. Why did she have to fall in love and mate with a jetii? Why couldn’t she just move on and be happy being the Duchess of Mandalore?

She felt her stomach lurch and she was barely able to grab the trash can beside her before she gagged. Nothing came up but she still felt so nauseous, so overwhelmed. How in the world would she be able to eat anything at dinner if she could barely keep the drinks she had earlier down? Perhaps nobody would notice if she avoided eating, avoiding doing anything to set off her now tender stomach.

How long she had been sitting on her bed, clutching the bin and praying that she wouldn’t lose her lunch blurred together. She heard the comms go off in her room, alerting her that dinner was ready to be served. Her stomach rolled but she stood, letting them know she’d be there in a moment. Her dress was zipped back up, becoming the poised duchess that everyone knew her as. She glanced at herself in the mirror, seeing that her face was pale and her eyes were slightly red rimmed, but she could play it off. Stress from the attacks by Death Watch and the betrayal by House Viszla could easily explain all of it. She just had to play it off as best she could.

--

“Some other time then…”

Satine cursed Obi-Wan’s former padawan’s timing in everything as she stepped away, Obi-Wan’s words ringing in her ears. Maybe they could have a decent conversation about where they stood but it just wasn’t destined to happen. She made her way back to her bedchamber and settled down again. She slowly removed the remainder of her headdress and ran her hands through her hair. She would have to compose herself before they landed on Coruscant but she could allow herself just a moment or two.

She wasn’t going to cry at least at this point. She was far more composed than she was before, but that did nothing to stop the war that was waging in her heart. What was she supposed to do? She had thought that maybe since they hadn’t seen each other in a long time that she could move on, but hearing him tell her that he would have left the Jedi Order for her sent the alpha in her reeling.

Tell him to stay, omega belongs at our side.

She shook her head, trying to silence the words of her inner Alpha as she had done so many times before. That part of her wanted her to use an Alpha Command to make sure Obi-Wan never left her side, but no, she wouldn’t. If Obi were to be by her side, she wanted him to make the conscious decision to. She wouldn’t force his hand. That wasn’t who she was and she knew that he would resent her if she did.

A knock on her door startled her out of her thoughts. “You can enter.” She felt relieved that her voice didn’t betray her warring thoughts. And of course, who was to enter the room but the man who was at the center of it.

“I noticed you weren’t eating anything at dinner, Satine, and I brought you a little something from the kitchen. You need to eat something small.” Obi-Wan smiled and set two plates on the desk. She was going to refute him and say she wasn’t hungry, but her stomach growled, her appetite returning full force. He gave her a smirk as she reached and grabbed at the plate, starting to eat. Around him, her walls fell and she ate with little decorum. He had seen her at her worst, so why did she have to keep up the facade. He started to eat from the other plate, a lot more composed than she felt. “I knew you’d be hungry.”

“Oh?” She swallowed the piece of bread in her mouth and arched an eyebrow. “And how, pray tell, did you know?”

“You went through a great ordeal like that and hadn’t eaten since before the Coronet departed. Anxiety and adrenaline kept you from feeling it before, but now that you’re calming down, I knew you’d want to eat something. You were the same when we were on the run.” She felt herself flush at his memories of her. He was saying so much, and yet not the words she necessarily wanted to hear…

“We should talk, Obi.” She said as she set her plate aside, feeling satiated for the time being. This would allow her to focus on the conversation at hand. “About what you said before, about how you were willing to leave the Jedi order for me.”

He was quiet, and she was certain that he was going to leave, but he didn’t. “I meant every word, Satine. Had you asked, I would have stayed in a heartbeat. Being separated from you… from what is essentially my other half, was torture. You would come to mind so frequently, and I’d be tempted to reach out to you, but then I got Anakin as a padawan, and the war was going on… I knew that I couldn’t do anything.” His fingers moved and rested at the spot where his mating mark resided. “The Jedi Code forbids attachments, but I cannot deny any more that I am not attached to you. You are my alpha, the other half of my being, and with your permission, Duchess, perhaps we can try something that goes against the code but not against our very natures.”

She tried to not get her hopes up, but she could feel her heart begin to swell. She would never ask him to leave the order, but she wanted him with her. She was tired of denying her feelings and could tell that he was too. Perhaps a compromise is in order.

“What do you have in mind, Ben?”

“I will still be a Jedi, I owe it to my troops and to Anakin and Ahsoka, but on my off time I will do my best to come visit you. I will stop by as much as I can while still partaking in my Jedi duties and as soon as the war is over, I will leave the order and take my place at your side.”

“You’re forsaking your beloved Jedi Code for me?” Satine was in complete shock, unsure how to respond. She had never thought that Obi-Wan would ever do that. He was the model Jedi in all shape and form, and she thought that he was never going to be hers, not fully.

“For us, Satine.” His head ducked for a moment, and she realized he was waiting on her approval. Much like her, he would never do anything that would push her too far. “And I’m not forsaking it. I’m just… bending the rules much like I know my wayward former padawan is doing.”

Her next words left her mouth before she really could have realized it. “My dear Obi-Wan, I have waited what feels like thousands of years for you to tell me this, and I don’t think I could wait any longer. I love you, Obi, and I would like that very much.”

[twilightofthe]

So...about that Obitine Anidala rant. Also, you said something about how Sidious and Obi-Wan are foils. I would love it if you elaborate. (Also, I love your blog.)

Awwwww thank you anon!  I just be yelling on here!

*wheezes* okie doke!  Tho I stress that this won’t exactly be a rant because I adore Obitine and Anidala and rant kinda implies aggression towards them, this is more of just a long-ass ramble because while I love them, I don’t always love the way canon portrays them in the narrative, particularly in relationship to each other, because I often do not feel that what the show is trying to push us to think about them is accurate to how they actually act and come across.  Notably, the show attempts to draw comparisons to the two relationships that really don’t exist below surface level similarities.  Again, these are my own personal opinions, and in fact, I welcome discussion!  I truly do!  Please politely debate me on this if you disagree!

(god dammit it got long again, so long I’ll actually put ur Sidious and Obi Wan as foils part in a separate post)

I’ll get to why exactly the show compares the relationships very strangely in a moment, but first we gotta explore the reason why it does this in the first place, which is that the Clone Wars show has decided to make Obi Wan and Anakin narrative foils to one another.  Narrative foils, by the literary definition, are two characters that contrast one another.  They don’t have to be the protagonist and the antagonist, these characters can be on the same side, basically the thing is that they have “opposite” personalities where if one character is hot, the other is cold, if one character chooses to go right, the other will go left.  It’s usually used to show one character’s qualities as more favorable for the situation as opposed to anyone else’s.

TCW does this whenever they possibly can with Anakin and Obi Wan.  I get its reasoning behind it.  I do.  The reasoning is that while Anakin is supposed to be a main character, he makes questionable decisions quite often and for the kiddies watching, those decisions must be seen as Bad even if the hero does it, so they have Obi Wan, the unquestionable good guy, encounter the exact same scenarios Anakin makes his questionable decisions in, and then has Obi Wan make the Right(TM) decision to teach the kids a valuable lesson.  They turn Obi Wan into the voice of reason for the entire show, which turns basically almost everything Obi Wan and Anakin do into a constant competition in the narrative in a way the movies do not do (and I’ll get to the movies later).  I’m not saying it’s necessarily a bad thing, making them foils, but it’s definitely more of a show-only thing and it does it quite, quite often.

So yeah, TCW likes to compare Obi Wan and Anakin to the point that sometimes they try and use Obi Wan to diminish Anakin’s genuine trauma and struggles by going “well why didn’t you do it like THIS?” and I think that writing parallel plotlines for the purpose of shaming/criticism is kinda ://////, but that’s another rant for another day that again, if y’all wanna hear about, lmk

Anyway, the need to compare them absolutely made its way into their romantic relationships as well, as they acknowledge the similarities in the show, and Filoni and the crew explicitly compare the two relationships in interviews.

Basically my problem with how they try and draw said parallels can be boiled down to one quote by Filoni that a cursory Google search could not find but I know exists so y’all can take my word or not, that went along the lines of “Obi Wan and Satine are like Anakin and Padmé but better because they know how to stay unattached and let each other go.  They’re a success story.”  I disagreed with this quote so much it inspired me to write a whole-ass fic about it (Mutuals update: yes, it is coming soon, Darth Maul is just himself and therefore an utter pain in the ass to do a POV on and is fighting me like the bitchass he is)

My thesis that I will be arguing today is that while TCW tried to create Obitine as an Anidala parallel, they’re really not similar in the way the writers think they are.  Obitine is not a success story to Anidala, they’re a goddamn tragedy too; the real parallel to Anidala is that Obitine also ended in death and tears despite making all the “right” decisions instead of all the “wrong” ones, and that is what is sad about them.

Like, on the surface level?  Yeah, the crew-intended parallels are there.  A fancy politician and a Jedi get together after the Jedi is assigned as the politician’s bodyguard.  The first time they see each other in over a decade the guy’s first words are basically “damn girl you’re still hot”, there is Conflict(TM) and the choice to try and be together or stay yearningly apart because they are Forbidden(TM) to be together, and ultimately a Sith Lord fucks them both over because he’s obsessed with the Jedi and uses Politician Lady to his advantage, finds and exploits a vulnerability of hers, destroys her life’s work, and then lets her die to make Jedi Man sad.  The difference is all that one pair said “yeah we aren’t gonna break the rules to be together” and the other said “fuck it yeah we are, let’s do this”

But beneath all of that, they real similarities are different and not at all focused on by the narrative.  Obi Wan and Anakin are extremely different people, as are Padmé and Satine, so their relationship dynamics together will not be the same.  You want to try and compare Obi Wan and Anakin and then compare Satine and Padmé like the crew attempts to, and you can’t, they have the same job but not nearly the same life.  Namely, the funny coincidence is that Obi Wan and Padmé are much more similar in personality, while Anakin and Satine are also much more similar in personality, so the first time they meet again, it’s both Anakin and Satine as the one who’s been pining for over a decade and the one more actively pursuing the relationship, while Obi Wan and Padmé who are more like “uh, hi, wow, you’re hot and this is a Problem because I have a job to do pls don’t look at me like that but also I will Cause Problems On Purpose and flirt with you anyway because I can’t help it”.  I get the Corruption TCW ep with Sati and Pads was mostly intended just to help Satine pass the Bechdel test and also show how similar the two leading lady love interests are, but it was a genuinely creative episode that actually ended up showing how much Satine and Padmé compliment each other instead of mirroring each other, much like Obi Wan and Anakin do.

And, onto my next point, despite the character parallels being wrong, the parallels in the relationship are different too.  Like I said, the parallel isn’t that Obi Wan and Satine aren’t attached like Anakin and Padmé are.  The parallel is that Obitine is actively running from what that attachment means instead of embracing it like Anidala is.  The show would argue that since they try to avoid it, that they are able to live without one another, means they aren’t attached like the Jedi define it, but I argue that they definitely still are attached to a degree because they cannot give each other up.  They held torches for each other from a timerange of 15 YEARS.  Yes I know they spent an entire year together at a young and emotionally volatile point in their lives, but I stand that NO ONE is that hung up on their ex for that long unless there is some serious emotions involved.  Anakin was hung up on Padmé for ten years, and that was because Palpatine was constantly bolstering those affections and reminding him of Padmé.  Obes and Sati both-- or at least Satine, the show always makes Obi Wan’s feelings for Satine in return much more vague --held on to their feelings for five years longer without the influence of a Sith Lord.

And the thing is, they know it.  Obi Wan and Satine are both fully aware that they haven’t been able to shake each other off like they should and that that is a Problem, that’s why they’re both a mite venomous with each other beneath the flirting at first, they’re both extremely frustrated with themselves for not being able to get over this thing they have, and frustrated with the other for being there as an active temptation.

And yet, they still are attached to each other.  They try to avoid it, they definitely try, and that’s what makes them different from Anidala, but they are definitely still attached.  You can see it in Obi Wan’s actions in Voyage of Temptation when Merrik is threatening to blow the ship, the way he hesitates in attacking him because that would be “striking an unarmed man”.  Obi Wan Kenobi does not prefer violence, no, but he has never hesitated to cut a bitch before if it’s for the good of the many.  This is the man who stabbed someone with a fork and threatened to eat him just to maintain his cover as a dangerous criminal.  This is the guy who had no problem killing Zam Wessel for information to protect Padmé.  This is a pragmatist who prefers peaceful solutions, but he does not hesitate if he feels it is a justified offense.  But this time, when an entire shipful of people is at risk, Obi Wan hesitates.  Because he doesn’t want to upset Satine.  Because he’s probably thinking on how she told him that if he had killed the last terrorist they encountered, she wouldn’t speak to him, how she had criticized every time he used violence to escape Death Watch before.  He hesitates because he’s putting her happiness, just for a second, over the sake of duty.  Do I think that if Anakin hadn’t shown up to save their moral compasses, Obi Wan would have eventually taken out Merrik?  Absolutely; hell, I honestly think Satine might have done it.

But the matter was, Merrik could have pressed the kill switch any second of Obi Wan’s hesitation, and Obi Wan knew that, and was hesitating anyway.

I am calling this attachment solely because if the situation was reversed, if this was Anakin and Padmé in this situation, with Anakin not taking out a dangerous criminal because he doesn’t want to upset Padmé (lol ignoring the fact that Pads 1000% would have shot that bitch, and even if she didn’t, Anakin would because he is perfectly fine with hurting his loved ones’ feelings if he feels it’ll keep them safe), god, the narrative would have eaten Anakin alive.  

No, I won’t take criticism.  I know how the show handles the Anidala dynamic.  It would have shown Obi Wan popping up to take out the baddie as him doing the right thing and saving the day, and then Anakin would have been shamed for letting his feelings for his wife get in the way of protecting a shipful of people.  THAT would be the Vader foreshadowing, none of this “only a cold-blooded killer” shit, no way would they ever stick that label on Obi Wan.

So yeah, I’m going off of the fact that if that would have been classified as attachment for Anidala-- which, it would, then. it counts for Obitine.

And then Obi Wan and Satine continue to be hung up on each other for the rest of the eps they’re in, Satine saying in words multiple times how much she loves and cares about him and wishes things could be different, and Obi Wan performing it in actions, risking his own neck and political standing to help her even when she’s a fugitive, probably personally putting in to send his own grandpadawan to help her later.  Right up to the time when Satine decides that she is going to call Obi Wan when she is deposed.  Not the Senate.  Not any powerful politician friends.  Not even the Jedi Order or the Council as a whole.  She calls and addresses her distress call to Obi Wan alone.  And Obi Wan, as now revealed to us by TCW S7, defies Council orders and breaks a century old neutrality treaty to try and bust her, a convicted murderer in the eyes of the Republic and Mandalore, out.  He didn’t even know Maul had her.  Just knew she was in danger and came running to her aid.  He risks starting a potential war to come save her.  They acted so in love that Vizsla was able to guess from being around them for like five seconds, and was able to tell Maul exactly who he would need to bait Obi Wan.

That is where the attachment comes from.  It’s the fact that Obi Wan and Satine tried so, so hard to give each other up and do the right thing, but when it came down to it, they couldn’t lose the other one so they put them first when logically they shouldn’t.  And thus, Satine ended up dead.

Now I know most people will argue with me that actually Filoni means that since they didn’t stay together after the year on the run, THAT is what makes them able to give each other up, and also the fact that Obi Wan didn’t go dark side and murder everyone when Satine died.

But I still think that at least the murder front is a fairly low bar to cross, and anyway, that just because they could live without each other didn’t mean they weren’t still attached.  Anakin and Padmé were apart for 10 years and then even after that, they were apart almost constantly during the war.  Just because they could live apart or even past the other’s death didn’t mean they weren’t attached, as they both still had not let the other go mentally and also broke rules to try and ensure the other would not die, even if the rules said they should let it happen.

So yeah, that’s my big theory.  We can’t compare Obitine with Anidala by saying Obitine was a success story, we compare them by acknowledging that both struggled with attachments and letting the other go, but Obitine at least tried to the bitter end to do the right thing while Anidala didn’t really bother, and both ended up with dead women and broken men regardless, and that is the true sad parallel to me.

[doopcafe]

Star Wars: The Clone Wars (Seasons 1--6), Final Analysis

Well, I made it through. 

Let’s be absolutely clear: The Clone Wars (TCW) is not good television. For the most part, it’s not even watchable television. The show suffers from serious fundamental issues in nearly every aspect of storytelling. Characters are underdeveloped and inconsistent; the dialogue is expository and contradictory; the tone is disjoint and jarring; and most episodes serve no greater purpose than to be a twenty-minute vessel to house lightsaber fights. 

So I want to put this part of the show to rest before I move on to Star Wars: Rebels (and before returning to watch season 7). 

With two exceptions, the show poorly handles twists and reveals. In the earlier seasons, reveals were spoiled mostly due to telegraphing: Captain Sleaze in Cloak of Darkness, Senator Clovis in Senate Spy, and Yolo (?) in Senate Murders come to mind, but there were others. In later seasons, telegraphing was supplanted by “small universe syndrome” as the primary cause of spoiled reveals. In The Academy, a cloaked figure was seen doing shady, back-alley deals, but his identity could only have been the Prime Minister. During the “Ahsoka framed” series, Barriss was obviously the traitor, simply because her character suddenly reappeared after four seasons and there were no other candidates. 

Probably the most successfully executed reveal was that of Krell, as his assholeness was at least initially masked as military rigidity. But even so, it was so over-the-top that when the reveal finally came to light, it felt more like an overdue disclosure than a dramatic twist. It didn’t help that, by that point in the show, the format of “asshole = upcoming reveal” had been firmly entrenched into the show’s DNA. 

I would argue that the most effective plot twist of the entire show was when the dancer/singer girl shot and killed Ziro the Hutt in Hunt for Ziro. Although irrelevant to the greater story, it was an actual twist because it was strongly implied the opposite would happen (i.e., Ziro would betray the girl). If there is to be a second place, that award would go to Ahsoka’s decision to leave the Jedi Order at the conclusion of The Wrong Jedi. But this leads me into my next point...

Who was the main character of The Clone Wars? If we go by the logic that whoever had the most screen time was the main character, then Anakin probably wins over Ahsoka. But if we go by the logic that the most developed character was the “main character,” then this is a show about Ahsoka. Ahsoka---more than any other character---grows in a noticeable way (from impatient, violent child to impatient, slightly less violent teenager). In contrast, Anakin in Rising Malevolence is the same character as Anakin in Voices (only a little more violent and angry for some reason). 

It’s unfortunate that her major character moments were never capitalized on. Intentionally sacrificing herself for the greater good in Weapons Factory apparently led to no lasting repercussions on her character. Her impatience and disobedience led to the deaths of thousands in Storm over Ryloth, but was similarly forgotten immediately afterwards. Even Ahsoka’s major character moment at the end of The Wrong Jedi resulted in her walking away from the show, never to address the implications of that decisions (although I suppose that’s the subject of Season 7). 

On a different note, the show was riddled by a shameful amount of “references” and fan service, for reasons exclusively external to the story. These “nods” ranged from the obvious “Obi-wan Kenobi, you’re my only hope” (or whatever Senator Jimmy Smits says in Cat and Mouse) to the innocuous design of a droid or background device. 

These “references” are objectively problematic for at least a few reasons. (1) They contribute to the sense that the universe is a really, really small place. Is the Mos Eisley cantina really the only place in the Outer Rim where shady deals go down? Is carbon freezing really the only way to store a person in stasis for transport? How long do Rodians live for anyways? Greedo’s gotta be what, like 80 when Han shoots him in A New Hope? It’s ironic that ultimately, this incomprehensibly large, diverse galaxy actually feels much smaller after watching this series because we keep going to the same twelve places...

(2) “Fan service” is tricky to get right because different people have different memories and impressions of the source material. In result, copying material will oftentimes comes across as a blatant misunderstanding of the original content. For example, to me, Vader put Solo into carbon freeze because it’s what Lando had lying around. It’s not a galactically established method of transporting people. Obi-Wan trained Luke with those laser balls aboard the Falcon because Han had them lying around and Obi-Wan needed to improvise a training exercise to kill time. 

(3) "References” and “nods” usually are just a band-aid for a lack of creativity. Some of the better episodes in the initial seasons were just direct rehashes of famous movies. Seven Samurai, Godzilla, Stray Dog, The Most Dangerous Game, King Kong... I mean, it’d be pretty impressive to mess-up stories like these, but it’s concerning that there were just so many episodes made from other people’s stories. 

These “references” even seep into the most innocuous of scenes. When Prequel!Wan lands on Mandalore to attempt a rescue of Satine from Darth Maul, one of the Mandalorians takes aim at him, only to have their blaster pushed down by their companion who’s shaking their head. This is a direct reference o the Tusken Raiders on Tatooine when Luke went after R2 in the desert. Even if this scene served an important plot purpose (it didn’t), there’s undoubtedly a multitude of ways to communicate the same thing. Instead, a small reference to the OT is interjected into the show, deimmersing the audience from the events shown. Unfortunately, this is just one (very small) example of hundreds over the whole show. 

Let me say something positive. The episodes that worked best (especially early in the show's run) were ones that focused on mortal people, usually the clones. Innocents of Ryloth was one of the first watchable episodes, simply because we didn't have to sit through twenty minutes of unlikable, unrelatable “Jedi” and instead followed around a pair of troopers helping a little girl using their limited abilities. Likewise, Pursuit of Peace was way more enjoyable than it probably should have been, simply because the story was understandable, the consequences clear, and the drama real. Plan of Dissent (when the clones actively rebel against Krell) was also noteworthy for similar reasons: clones we liked must subdue a “Jedi” we’ve learned to hate. 

This isn’t to say that episodes focused on the major characters were inherently unenjoyable, it’s just that none of these characters had any room to grow (with the exception of Ahsoka). Dooku, Grievous, Anakin, Prequel!Wan... They were the same characters as portrayed in Episode II and III. As presented, there was nowhere for these characters to go. Dooku was literally identical at the beginning of the series as he was at the end, and the same can be said about the others. 

But these are false constraints the writers imposed upon themselves. Grievous was not in Episode II and was introduced in Episode III. TCW could have started him however they wanted and then illustrated his change into the character he later becomes. Who was he? What was his motivation? Why did he hate Jedi so much? The show was handed a completely clean slate to deliver a character from scratch, but instead we were immediately shown “Episode III General Grievous” with zero introduction because fans were expected to already know who he was. 

This is partly why the backstory episode to Grievous was so compelling, at least in premise: viewing his home was personal to his story and it represented a chance to learn a bit more about the character and where he came from. Of course, it was mostly mishandled by a reliance on meaningless action, but the high ratings of that particular episode suggest there was room for quality television here, it just was never capitalized on.

Instead, we have completely static caricatures, especially for minor characters from the movies. Admiral Tarkin, Admiral Ackbar, Greedo (among others) were written out of cardboard and their roles in the plot could have just as easily been played by anyone else (there was nothing unique about their roles that required them to be these characters). 

This is a shame because a lot could have been done with the established premise to really focus on Anakin, his motivations, and his relationship to his Padawan. I would have been okay with a lot of backtracking if it meant I could begin to grasp his “fall” to the Dark Side. Instead, I’m honestly more confused than ever about his motivation.

One argument is that Anakin joins the Dark Side because he like, “loves” Padme (or whatever). However, what we’re shown in this show---consistently, clearly---is that Padme and Anakin have a toxic, dysfunctional relationship. He is uncomfortably jealous and rarely trusts her. They argue nearly every time they’re together. Their “love” (or whatever) must remain secret, equating their relationship to something “wrong” or even “illegal” that must be kept secret, even on the verge of death. In a later episode, Anakin orders Padme to listen to him because he’s the “man” and, as his wife, she doesn’t have a say in the matter. This is clearly a broken relationship and the best result is the one that actually happens: They stop seeing each other. Anakin wants to save this woman from a vision? Why? 

This brings up a second point, which is that Anakin can’t stand the pain of losing someone. His desire to protect those close to him may be Anakin’s only redeeming trait. He has a single selfless scene (in the entire show) during the opening of Jedi Crash where he sacrifices himself to delay an explosion and save his companions. I want to stress that any other scene where Anakin saves or helps someone isn’t done because he’s a good person, it’s done because he’s a broken person. It’s done because he, personally, would struggle with the emotional toll of knowing he allowed someone close to him to be hurt or die. In other words, he’s doing nice things for selfish reasons. 

As far as I’m concerned, Anakin has always been Darth Vader. He is given choices between being a Jedi and allowing a lot of people to die, and he enjoys choosing the second. In Ghosts of Mortis, we’re shown that the threshold between “Anakin” and “Darth Vader” is disconcertingly low, requiring only a few choice words and less than a minute to convert him. In short, what I’ve learned from TCW regarding Anakin Skywalker is that he was an unlikable dick, and his “turn” to the Dark Side was just a long-overdue reveal. 

While the later seasons worked towards the events in Episode III in a way that at least made a bit of sense, earlier seasons were focused on adult-themed wacky hijinks. In a way, the show almost would have worked better as a kid’s show, but this was clearly meant for adults: politics, war, slavery, and lots and lots of horrific violence. In comparison, the silly adventures of Star Wars: Resistance worked well because the show didn’t take itself too seriously. It was very clearly, from the start, a lighthearted show about kids going on fun adventures. In contrast, TCW suffered because its themes were adult in nature, but was portrayed as a Saturday morning cartoon show. The humor was misplaced, the tone disjointed from actual events, and the violence excessive. 

Let me say a few words on the “Jedi.” Initially I labeled them as overpowered (OP), because in earlier episodes they seemed invincible and dissolved tension in every scene. Later, we see a slew of them get cut down as plot fodder, even against widely different situations. We see Luminara and others push through hoards of droids only to see “Jedi” Master Yoda-like dude get taken down by a dog. We watch as Fisto *heh* powers through entire battalions and the cone-head guy counting coup against an army, only to watch as pink girl gets shot in the face by a single clone who stands in front of her for several seconds before pulling the trigger. 

It’s nearly impossible to feel tension in these scenes because the metrics for judging the true strength of a “Jedi” keep shifting as a function of the plot requirements. Anakin suddenly forgets how to use the Force when the plot needs his help to fake some drama. Prequel!Wan pointlessly fist fights with a slaver cat for an hour until the plot needs him to get back up again and OP everyone in the room. Even their ships are only as strong or weak as the plot needs them to be. Plo Koon’s fleet is devastated in seconds in order to portray the Malevolence as being a threat; Anakin’s fleet powers through a larger force three times its size because Anakin’s like, really mad about something. 

Secondly, the “Jedi,” in general, were unlikable assholes. They were consistently portrayed as violent and ignorant and I struggled to understand them as real people. Frequently, we witnessed them torture victims, default to a lightsaber to solve problems, and enjoy death to the point of counting coup against sentient life forms defending their homes. Anakin threatened civilians with his lightsaber. Ahsoka was annoyed when she’s asked not to murder a defenseless creature in Jedi Crash. Prequel!Wan and Anakin team up to hurtle enormous rocks into a beaten monster in Dooku Captured. A trio of Jedi Masters mentally gang bang a shackled Cad Bane. They supported state terrorism when it suited their needs, but agreed to abandon their friends for political reasons. 

I mean, these are not good people...

This is a shame, because my impression of true Jedi comes from Luke, Yoda, and Obi-Wan in the OT, as well as the expanded universe novels that take place afterwards. It always seemed to me that being a Jedi was about conquering oneself, one’s fears, and learning to use the Force to selflessly help others and let go of all worldly attachments. You know, like the Buddhists they were originally inspired by. I always had the impression that the Force was extremely powerful and that Yoda was only showing Luke a portion of what was possible. That the Emperor was only using Force lighting to toy with Luke. That Vader only Force choked his officers because it was visually intimidating and kept them in line. 

Instead, we’re treated to some garbage about how a “Jedi” is nothing greater than an actuator to swing around a lightsaber. When Luke enters Jabba’s palace in Jedi to rescue his friends, it’s not with lightsaber swinging, cutting shit up, flipping around like an acrobatic monkey. Imagine Anakin and Ahsoka in the same scene. They’d blaze through the palace corridors before Force choking Jabba as the Darth Vader theme plays. Forget the rancor, these are demigods. They have lightsabers. Have you seen them? They go “woosh woosh.” 

In short, there was little to look up to in terms of a “hero” character. I can see how children can look up to Luke as a role model, someone they want to emulate or play with as a toy, but looking up to Anakin? Ahsoka? Hey kids, wanna learn to become a psychopath? First, you use your power to abuse those who are weaker than you. Then you need to get really really angry and uncontrollably choke someone, preferably your sister or one of your cousins. 

And so, for a Saturday morning cartoon show, it is very unclear who we’re supposed to care about. I liked when Ahsoka went against Anakin because I hated his character so much. I liked everything with Hondo, a pirate. I liked Ventress a little, because she was actively seeking to kill the main characters. I liked some of the clones, but I don’t know which ones because they all looked the same. I cared about Darth Maul because I’m honestly a little worried about him, especially after the loss of his brother. I kinda liked General Grievous just because he hates the “Jedi” and was therefore relatable (even though the reasoning was never explained). And... that’s it. 

At no point did I ever “look forward” to the next episode. I painfully died a little on the inside hitting the “watch next” button every single time.

This “review” is already way too long, so let me summarize by applying my five-star rating system (developed for movies) to each episode. In review:

5. Amazing, classic, culturally important. Something everyone should watch.  4. Great; very well done, no significant flaws. 3: Entertaining with only minor gripes/criticisms.  2: “Watchable,” but suffers from flaws and has some poor parts.  1. Uncomfortably bad; suffers from serious flaws. 0. Painfully bad, would actively fight against being forced to watch a second time. 

The 3-star episodes were: 

Hostage Crisis

Lightsaber Lost 

Pursuit of Peace

Carnage of Krell

The Wrong Jedi 

Hostage Crisis was the introduction of Cad Bane, Lightsaber Lost was the remake of Stray Dog (and the only episode to include a real Jedi), Pursuit of Peace was the random Padme/politics episode that was strangely well-executed, Carnage of Krell was the reveal of Krell as a bad guy and his clones working to apprehend him, and The Wrong Jedi was Ahsoka leaving the Jedi Order (and the only episode to include a true character moment). 

Also, I scaled the IMDB ratings of each episode to my ratings and then detected outliers in their overlap. In other words, I wanted to answer the question, “which episodes did I rate the most differently from others?” 

Turns out, I rated every single episode lower except for seven. Those seven were: 

Mercy Mission (+1.853) - R2 and 3PO discover an underground world with ents. This one is universally panned by “fans,” but was a competently handled episode apart from the disappointing resolution. 

Pursuit of Peace (+1.382) - Padme struggles to win support for a Senate bill. Another competently handled episode that focuses on Padme and politics and is ranked low by “fans.”

Lightsaber Lost (+0.6471) 

Weapons Factory (+0.4118) - An average episode with a dramatic scene of sacrifice by Ahsoka and her “friend” Barriss. 

Shadow Warrior (+0.3824) - Grievous is captured during some dramatic moments on Naboo. 

Hostage Crisis (+0.3529)

Front Runners (+0.0882) - One of the rebels episodes, I don’t remember which. 

In conclusion, Star Wars: Rebels is next and I am somehow still alive.

[dettiot]

Fic: late-night interruption 9/11

late-night interruption Author: dettiot Rating: G Summary: When Obi-Wan receives a late-night comm from Sabé, he’s not sure what to expect. But what he learns will change many lives . . . and the fate of the Republic. Note: There's only two more chapters to go after this one! I'm really excited about sharing the conclusion to this fic, and I really appreciate everyone who have let me know they're enjoying the story. Also, I love how I explained Satine's survival after Maul stabbed her with the Darksaber, so even though I'm sure it makes no sense--after all, it's Star Wars. Nothing makes sense. :-)

Also on AO3!

XXX

As he gently rocked Luke in his arms, watching Ahsoka make faces and smile at Leia, Anakin Skywalker felt at peace for perhaps the first time in his life. 

Before this moment, the closest he had come to this feeling was in his earliest days. When he was with his mother, wrapped in her love and care. But growing up on Tatooine as a slave, bothered by strange impulses and advanced reflexes, his fear and worry had worked against his mother’s calm, centering presence. 

Then came the years of training, butting heads with Obi-Wan while seeking his approval, the whirlwind of his romance with Padmé, the start of the war, the secrets and hiding . . . there had been no peace. 

Not until now, when he had broken the Jedi Code beyond redemption and the Chancellor, the man he considered a mentor, might be the true source of all the galaxy’s problems . . . now, he felt the serenity he had always been searching for. 

And then Leia opened her mouth and yowled, followed by Luke a moment later. 

“What did I do?!?” Ahsoka yelped, holding Leia away from her body. Leia’s face was red and her fists were balled up as she cried. 

Chuckling softly, Anakin rocked Luke as he lifted Leia up and held her close to him, so she could cuddle up against both him and Luke. Within a moment, Leia settled down and her brother did the same. “Nothing, Snips. She’s a baby, sometimes she’s just gonna cry.” 

“Now I wish I had spent more time in the crèche,” Ahsoka said with a sheepish smile. She tilted her head to look at him. “I know you spent even less time there than I did--how are you so good at this?” 

Anakin shrugged a little. “Don’t know. It just . . . I feel like I know what to do.” 

“You always had good instincts with kids,” Ahsoka said. 

“Thanks,” Anakin said. “If it wasn’t for the Force, I’m sure I’d be useless.” 

“I doubt that, Skyguy,” Ahsoka said softly. 

That made him look at Ahsoka, really taking her in. She had gotten taller, and her montrals were longer, with more defined patterns there and on her face. But the physical was only part of how she had changed. She seemed . . . more guarded. Less open. She held herself differently and didn’t react like Anakin expected. 

It made him want to go straight to the Jedi Council and ask them if they realized what they had done, how they had discarded Ahsoka like a broken blaster instead of treating her like a person, a member of the Order . . . 

But--but that wouldn’t change the past. Even if it would make Anakin feel better. 

He drew in a deep breath. Ahsoka had left the Order because she hadn’t felt like she belonged. Perhaps that might change in the future. He hoped it would. Even if he was expelled from the Order, he hoped Ahsoka would find her way back to being a Jedi one day. 

And even if she never did, he knew Ahsoka would always do what was right. She would always help people. 

“Ahsoka, I hope you know that--no matter what, I care about you,” he said, stumbling a little over his words. “You--you’re like what I imagine having a sister is like, and--just because you’re not part of the Order--I mean . . . even if you don’t ever come back, my feelings won’t ever change.” 

A warm smile lit up Ahsoka’s face. Something more mature than her old cheeky grin, but no less joyful. “Thank you, Anakin.”

“I mean it,” he said, rocking the twins a little. “You’re part of my family. Just like Obi-Wan is, which is the only way I was able to get him to be here when the twins were born.” 

“I know you mean it,” Ahsoka said, looking up at him--but not as much as she used to. “I can feel it. And I meant it when I said thank you. It . . . it makes a difference, knowing that . . . that I’m not alone in the galaxy.” 

“Not as long as I’m around,” Anakin promised. “And I bet the kids will feel the same way about you. You’ll be the cool aunt who tells them all the cool things she does.” 

Ahsoka let out a soft laugh. “And Obi-Wan will be the cool uncle?” 

“I don’t know about that . . .” Anakin said with a grin. “Although he does have a bunch of stories about me being an idiot, so I suppose that could hold a bit of appeal for the twins someday.” 

That made Ahsoka laugh harder, only to bite it off when Luke made a little snuffling noise. “Oh, sorry!” Ahsoka whispered.

“It’s okay, Snips. Here, hold Luke--he likes everyone, it seems,” he said, handing Luke over to her. 

She looked down at Luke, rubbing his back a little. “His eyes look just like yours, Anakin.” 

“Yeah, Padmé and I were talking about how much each of them look like us. Leia’s gonna be just as pretty as her mother, aren’t you, my little love?” he cooed to Leia. She blinked her brown eyes at him, then patted her little hand against his chest. 

“That’s right,” he said, smiling at his daughter. “Pretty like Padmé and stubborn like me. It’s a good thing Uncle Obi-Wan has so much experience with stubborn Skywalkers, since he’s gonna train you someday, isn’t that so?” 

“Oh, Force.” 

Anakin blinked and looked at Ahsoka, who was staring at Luke. “Ahsoka?” Anakin asked. “What is it?” 

“I . . . I think Luke has connected to me?” she said, sounding confused. “It--it feels a bit like my bond with you.” 

Stretching out, Anakin used his feelings to explore his son’s. His discovery made him beam. “Uh-oh. Looks like Luke knows who he wants to train him.” 

Ahsoka stared at him. “Anakin!” 

“Hey, it doesn’t mean it’s going to happen,” Anakin said, trying to reassure her. “Look at your bond with Master Plo.” 

“That felt different from this,” Ahsoka said, looking back down at Luke, her face softening--probably without her realizing it, Anakin thought. 

“There’s also a lot of time before either Luke or Leia are ready to be Padawans,” Anakin reminded her. “Especially with everything that’s going on--” 

Leia tugged at his tunic, interrupting him. When he looked at her, there was something about her face that made him think of Padmé. He rubbed her back and looked at Ahsoka. “And . . . and they might not be trained as Jedi anyway.” 

His former Padawan’s eyes went wide. “What? With how Force sensitive they are?” 

Anakin breathed out slowly. “Padmé had a really strong reaction to the twins being so strong in the Force. It was right after she gave birth, so her emotions were all over the place, but--but I think she feels conflicted over the idea of giving the twins to the Temple.” 

“Oh,” Ahsoka said, her natural empathy showing in her voice. “That must be very difficult to think about. Especially when you’re holding your newborns and you think you have to give them up.” 

“Yeah,” Anakin said. “And . . . well, I’m done hiding things from the Council. But if I get expelled, I wouldn’t even be there to keep an eye on them. Not that I don’t trust you or Obi-Wan or the other Jedi, but . . .” 

“It’s not the same,” Ahsoka said, nodding her head. “But, Master--I don’t think you’ll be expelled.” 

There was such certainty in her voice, Anakin had to look at her. She gave him a small smile.

“Last night, before I contacted Obi-Wan, I felt something in the Force. A shift that seemed to mean there was something good coming. I think it might have been the birth of the twins. So I don’t see how something the Force sees as a positive would lead to your expulsion.” 

Could it be? Could his children be so important? He hadn’t felt such stirrings, but then, he had been a little distracted, what with Padmé giving birth. Perhaps Obi-Wan had noticed something--he would have to talk to him later. Once their meeting was over, once they knew exactly what was happening with the clones. 

Once Obi-Wan finished reuniting with his lost love. 

Anakin looked at Ahsoka. “What do you think is happening out there? With Obi-Wan and the Duchess?” 

“I’ve been trying to give them privacy, even with how emotional they both feel,” Ahsoka said, which Anakin acknowledged with a nod. “But . . . but I think it’s going to turn out okay.” 

“I sure hope so,” Anakin said, gently rocking Leia and moving her towards the crib. “I think we’re going to need both Obi-Wan and Satine for what’s to come. Although if anyone deserves a break from putting the galaxy first, it’s those two.” 

“Now that I’ve seen them together, I agree,” Ahsoka said. “I wonder what they’re doing.” 

XXX

Never before had a silence held so much. 

Obi-Wan couldn’t stop staring at Satine as Padmé ushered everyone else out of the room. In the back corner of his mind, he wondered if he should feel grateful to the Senator for allowing him these moments with Satine. 

And that realization left him standing as silent and still as a nerf surrounded by banthas. 

Like so many times in their past, it was Satine who took the first step. “Obi-Wan--” 

Her voice made him squeeze his eyes shut. She was thin and pale, clearly still recovering from her injury and the toil of her recovery. Her beautiful blonde hair was cut close to her scalp, and her eyes were shadowed with pain and worry. 

But her voice was the same. Strong and sure, steady and unyielding. 

And there was no trace of anger or judgment in her voice. No unspoken accusation about him leaving her for dead. 

He supposed he felt enough of that for both of them. 

How--how could he have not realized Satine was still alive? He had held her close, extending his emotions for any flicker of her presence, searching for a heartbeat, but there had been nothing. 

“I don’t understand,” he said softly, opening his eyes to look at her. “I . . . I was sure that you were dead.” 

“So was I,” Satine said, her eyes warmer and softer than he had ever seen them. “I would not have told you how I felt about you unless I thought I was dying.” 

His heart clenched in his chest and Obi-Wan opened his mouth, ready to--he wasn’t sure what he was ready to do, and he didn’t get a chance to find out, because Satine took two steps towards him and covered his mouth with her hand. 

Her skin was warm and smooth against his lips, and he could catch the faintest hint of lilies--the perfume she had always worn, even during their year on the run when it could have been used to identify her. The scent that had once wrapped around the both of them, when they had--

“No, Obi,” Satine whispered, jerking him out of his lustful thoughts. “You don’t have an obligation to say anything. I only told you because--because I wanted you to know. So you knew there was someone who . . .” 

She let her voice trail off, then swallowed and dropped her hand from his face. 

“The first Mandalorian Jedi created the Darksaber. You know that, of course,” Satine said, not waiting for any acknowledgement from him before continuing. “What the Jedi didn’t know is the Darksaber has a will of its own. Something special about the crystal that powers it, so the legends say.” 

Obi-Wan took a deep breath, trying to rise above his emotions. “Kyber crystals pick their Jedi. So it’s not outside the realm of possibility that the Darksaber has similar characteristics.” 

“Yes,” Satine said, clasping her hands together. “So when Maul used the Darksaber on me . . . it did not wish for me to die.” 

“But--but you were stabbed,” Obi-Wan said, knowing he sounded like a fool for stating the obvious. “Straight through your chest.” 

Satine gave a gentle shrug of her shoulders. “I’m as confused as you are. As disbelieving. Yet here I stand. As best as my doctors can determine, the Darksaber shifted itself as it entered my body, reforming the blade to allow my vital organs to be dealt only glancing blows. My muscles were shredded and I needed a new set of lungs, but . . . but I survived.” 

It was so extraordinary, so seemingly impossible. Yet . . . he was a Jedi. He had seen so many remarkable events in his life, witnessing what most would call miracles. 

Too often, he had faced heartbreak and tragedy--random, chaotic, meaningless. And he had consoled himself by remembering it was all the will of the Force. Could it be, for once in his life, the will of the Force brought happiness and renewal? 

Such thoughts weren’t very Jedi-like of him. All things came from the Force, and its will moved in mysterious ways that couldn’t be fully understood. But right now, Obi-Wan didn’t want to act like a Jedi.

He wanted to act like a man. A man reunited with the woman who meant everything to him. 

“Satine,” he said softly, moving towards her. He reached out and gently wrapped his hands around her clasped ones, savoring the warmth of her skin. 

She never hesitated to look in his eyes. To meet his gaze and listen to what he had to say, even if it wasn’t what she wanted to hear. And this time was no different. So he could see the hope in her eyes. 

“When we first met, no one had ever looked at me and just knew me so quickly, so thoroughly,” Obi-Wan said, gazing at her. “And even though we both grew and changed, you still know me.”

“I do,” Satine said softly, turning her hands in his grasp in order to lace her fingers through his. “Just like you know me.” 

Nodding, Obi-Wan smiled at her, leaning forward to rest his forehead against hers. This close to her, he could see the fine lines on her face, the way her lips oh-so-slightly trembled, the glimmer of tears in her eyes. 

And even though he had always thought confessing his feelings to Satine would be the most difficult thing he would ever do, it wasn’t. 

“I loved you always . . . and I always will, Satine,” he told her, purposefully repeating the words of her own confession. “I do not say this out of obligation--but because it’s what I feel, and to hide that is wrong--” 

“Oh, shut up,” Satine said, going up on her toes and kissing him softly. 

It was like the whole galaxy burst into song. Not simply because they were kissing, but because . . . they were in love. 

Obi-Wan closed his eyes and kissed her back slowly, taking his time, feeling every precious emotion Satine created within him, drawing her close and into his arms. 

All too soon, Satine pulled back and he followed her lips, bending down to kiss her. 

“That was quite rude, my dear,” he said, pressing soft kisses along her jaw. “Telling me to shut up?”

“Oh . . . well . . . Jedi are so much talk and so little action,” Satine breathed out, tilting her head to give him more access to her skin. 

“Only some Jedi,” he said, lightly nipping her earlobe. 

Satine let out the most gratifying little gasp of a whimper and drew away from him. “Obi, as--as extremely pleasant as this is--” 

“We have work to do,” he finished for her, nodding. But that didn’t stop him from reaching out and holding her hand. “But Satine, just so we’re clear . . . once our work is done? I am yours. No matter what.” 

Over the years, there had been a few moments when he had seen Satine happy. They were moments he treasured, how the light of her Force presence increased and her smile reached her eyes. But right now, he could tell Satine was more than happy. She was practically radiant in her joy. 

And Obi-Wan wanted to make her that happy for the rest of his life.  

XXX

If there was one thing Padmé Amidala knew, it was maintaining a secret romance. She understood how hard it was to stay professional when you wanted to be with your love, to show some sign of your relationship. 

It was wonderful that Satine was alive. Amazing, in fact. Padmé had grieved for the Mandalorian Duchess, a woman who had inspired Padmé to balance both the political and the personal. To remember she was also Padmé as well as Senator Amidala, and that she couldn’t be an effective Senator if she wasn’t also a person, too. 

So the least Padmé could do was give Satine and Obi-Wan a few minutes together. To allow them time to talk, to resolve their emotions. Because Padmé had never seen Obi-Wan so emotional as when he saw Satine. 

Unfortunately, though, their time was almost up. The meeting was scheduled to begin soon, and while their other guests hadn’t arrived yet, it was likely to happen any moment now. 

Taking a breath, Padmé looked at Lady Kryze and smiled. “It shouldn’t be much longer before the meeting begins. It’s probably time to remind everyone about the meeting and gather in the living room. Goodness knows Anakin loses all track of time around the twins.” 

Lady Krzye nodded, her lips quirking upwards. “And someone should go make sure Satine and Master Kenobi are still clothed.” 

“Ah, so you . . . are aware of their past?” Padmé said, tilting her head to one side as she settled on an appropriate euphemism for the relationship between Satine and Obi-Wan.

The Mandalorian woman snorted. “Of course. No one makes Satine lose her temper like he does.” 

“I don’t think anyone unsettles Obi-Wan like Satine, so I suppose they’re equal.”

With a nod, Lady Kryze said, “I’ll take care of my sister and her jetii.” 

“I’ll meet you there after I’ve gotten Anakin and Ahsoka,” Padmé said, feeling a flutter of gratitude to Lady Kryze for volunteering to handle the more awkward situation.

The two of them separated and Padmé headed to the nursery, excited to get a few moments with the twins before she had to focus on work. 

Seeing Anakin hold both the babies made her heart melt. Padmé stepped inside quietly and walked over to him. “Hello, my darlings.” 

Anakin smiled widely at her. “Hey, angel. I was just going to put the twins in their crib.” 

“Are they asleep?” Padmé asked, noticing how Ahsoka slipped out of the room. She managed to smile quickly at the Togruta before turning her attention to the children. 

“Not yet, but they’re definitely sleepy,” Anakin said, showing her Leia’s face smushed against his tunic, her eyes drifting shut and her lips pursed. 

Padmé gently stroked Leia’s head, then lifted her out of Anakin’s arms. She settled Leia against her chest, swaying from side to side. Leia let out a soft little sigh, looking up at Padmé with so much love and trust in her eyes. 

As she gazed at her daughter, Padmé couldn’t help smiling. Leia was just so precious and unique. The idea of getting to watch Leia grow up, taking pride in her successes and helping with her challenges, was a humbling one. Getting to do that with Luke as well made Padmé feel even more humble. 

There wasn’t much time before the meeting. Part of her wished she could just stay here, and sing Leia to sleep and then cuddle Luke while telling him a story. But this meeting would mean so much to the whole galaxy. It could lead to the peace which would allow her to spend such time with her babies. 

Still . . . there was enough time to spend a few minutes with the twins. 

“Aren’t they just perfect?” Anakin whispered. 

And Padmé could only smile and nod at him. Because he was right. 

End, Chapter 9