#and i guess thats bc im the closest to her and she is the most raw with me

[rucow]

my mom and i both have pisces sun/mars/mercury/saturn in 8H, scorpio IC, and aquarius venus in 6H.....astrology is insane 🫣

[cinnamoodles]

the language of flowers — part one, daises

warnings: angst, of course, and bad writing? ooc anthony bc i suck and thats unwarranted <33

word count: 1.8k (wowza)

author’s note: hello! this is my first published fic, so im pretty sure it’s going to be horrible, but i had this idea after reading Sherlock Holmes, so… im excited, i guess? this is part of a series i will publish, but for now... yay! first fic celebration!

read the other parts! — part two, irises | part three, peonies

i don’t consent for my work to be reposted or copied, translated, or transferred to any other platform, or this one, in part or whole.

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i. 1802, bellis perennis. daisies, platonic love

It was a day in which the sun blazed as though it had a fury against all of England, the sweltering heat resulting in most of the country to stay indoors, and perhaps enjoy a cool glass of lemonade. The unforgiving rays of the sun shone glitteringly on the lake, as if to mock those who stayed inside, flamboyantly displaying its beauty.

Anthony Bridgerton was a boy, (or a man, as he liked to proclaim himself, as he was just a year from being eighteen), who did not like to stay inside, especially on a glorious day like this. He liked to forget the matter that it was well over 35 degrees celsius, but in his words, such a beautiful, sunny day should not go to waste.

“Why have you dragged me out here, Mr. Bridgerton?” You groan against the thick coat of your own horse. As the only daughter of a Duke with three sons, you had to dress up prim and proper, much to your chagrin, before going out, especially with a boy, whether it be one of your closest friends or not. You run your hands through your hair—which you've left open, because, in your words, damn society, no single person should be subject to those horrid pins in their hair on a hot summer's day!, before you stormed out of your estate, to head to the stables to find solace in one of your most trusted companions.

He grins, sending a flutter of butterflies amok in your stomach. Deep inside, you knew that there was no way that he would ever even consider you romantically, as you were exactly the age of his brother, Benedict, who, no doubt, was ever the charmer, but Anthony had a special place in your heart. Your first love, (could one even call it love? You would often dismiss it as infatuation, but when he looked at you like that, how could your youthful little heart disregard it?), and most of all, your first friend. “Well,” he starts, “first of all, you can cease the formalities, or I’ll push you off your horse.” He leisurely rides up next to you, smirking. “And there isn’t any harm in calling on my closest friend for a few hours of her time, is there not?”

“Of course not, but you know how my mother hounds me,” you sigh tiredly, rubbing the nape of your neck. “It is almost as if…” reddening, you bite your lip. You knew that your mother was always on a tirade on how you and Anthony would be perfect together, but you know that he did not feel the same way. You sneak in a gaze at his soft dark hair, and his gorgeous, deep brown eyes, always glimmering with mischief of some sort. 

He turned to you, frowning. “As if? She hasn’t got a problem with me, has she?”

Your eyes widen, and you quickly backtrack on your words. “No! No, of course she hasn’t got a problem with you, she’s just a bit… spirited, that’s all. Just very spirited and a woman very worried about what society has to say about me—not that I care, of course.”

“Just let her know that I’m most definitely not giving up my friendship with you just because of the nonsense the Ton spews on an hourly basis.” You give an extremely unladylike snort at his words, which sends the both of you into a fit of laughter.

The both of you finally reach the site that Anthony must have wanted to show you. It’s a corner beside the lake, with a patch of wildflowers and a small woodland area behind it. The sunlight shines onto the surface of the lake, and small dragonflies lazily float around the flowers. What entrances you most is the flora near the area. While, of course, you've seen flowers before, since your own father boasts one of the most intricate gardens in London, there isn’t any garden that could hold a candle to the natural beauty, the wild, untamed, disorderly allure of this particular strip of land. Fireweed and cattails rub against the agrimonies and bellflowers, and you have to physically stop yourself from letting your jaw drop and stare at the scene in front of you.

The dark-haired boy enthusiastically gets down from his horse, rubbing his eyebrow, and holds his hand out to your stunned self. You bite back a smirk when you notice his actions, and steady yourself against his glove. “I don’t need you to do all this,” you tease. “I can get down from a horse just fine by myself.”

“Really?” He smirks. “Alright then.” Letting go of you abruptly, he wipes off his hands on his breeches, while behind him, you trip to the ground, dust pooling and clouding around you, and you land on your ankle.

“Ow!” You shriek, your hands scratched from the rough, gravelly grass. You examine your ankle, which is slightly swollen and red, along with giving you large, throbbing pains. “Anthony, you’re such a prick!” You steady yourself against a tree trunk when he turns around and sees you, in pain. He quickly rushes to your side, steadying you by placing his hands on your hips, and you try, (and fail), to ignore your heart working on overdrive. “Y/N, I’m so sorry. Really, I didn’t know it would hurt you, I didn't know you were that high up.”

“What do you know, then?” You grumble, trying to hold weight on your foot. When you wince, Anthony immediately carries you in his arms in a bridal hold, and you have to take all the willpower you have to not stare at his biceps, or worse, swoon right there. “Anthony! Put me down!” You cry, halfheartedly, your inner thoughts wishing that he wouldn’t listen to a word you said. “If you drop me, I swear I will hurt you.”

“Y/N,” he smiles at you, “trust me, I know better than to cross you by now.” He readjusts his hands, and one of them, (you’re too frazzled to notice which), lands on the small of your back, and you are sure that you will combust within a second if he keeps this up. “And,” he continues, “I haven’t dragged you all the way here just so you can go home. And trust me, you're not heavy at all.” He smirks, raising one of his hands so that you can see it, and taps your nose.

“Anthony—oh god—what the bloody hell are you doing?”

“Proving you haven't got anything to worry about. Don’t worry, darling.” The word sends a shiver down your spine, and the moment just seems so perfect: you, in his arms, his dark, dreamy eyes gazing into your own, his breath hot on your cheek. He smells of sandalwood and citrus—the same smell that haunts you day and night, in your dreams and nightmares.

You relax into his arms, and are snapped out of your daze only by the soft brush of something against your nose—petals? You open your eyes to a grinning Anthony, tapping your face with a hastily bundled bunch of flowers.

“Anthony,” you frown, “I was relaxing. Do not forget that you caused my devastating injury.” You pout, widening your eyes and biting your lips, trying to play the fact that you’re merely an innocent bystander of his tomfoolery. He sighs, and waves the flowers in front of your face.

“That is precisely what this is for, you hypochondriac—ow! Sorry! I picked you flowers, because you're so microscopic that I can carry you with one hand.” He gently placed you down on a gravelly stone bench, among the wildflowers and its concomitant insects, hurriedly putting a bouquet of flowers in your hand. 

Daises.

The Guide for Flora for Debutantes: Resplendent in its simplicity, the daisy's tender white petals encircle a sunny heart, a poignant reflection of the chaste and enduring affection shared amongst esteemed companions of a non-romantic nature. The suitor that gives this flower to you may not desire to pursue a romantic relation, but shows no ill will towards you, and would in fact like to continue a relationship based purely on friendship. 

Your mind flashes to a paragraph in one of your least-loved books, but one your governess insisted you study. Perhaps he didn’t mean to give you these gut-wrenching, heartbreaking flowers, flowers that left your soul shattered on the ground, due to your dramatics. Men, in particular, were never very observant when it came to flowers. “Well, there might be a privilege to being microscopic then,” you smile, feigning delight. “Say,” you gaze up at Anthony’s eyes, “what made you pick these particular ones? Is there anything special about daises?”

“Er, no…” Anthony frowned. “They were the only ones that looked nice enough to give to you. The others looked like weeds, if I am being completely forthright.” You stifle a laugh, and perhaps there indeed was no symbolism behind the flowers the gave you, nothing other than fate.

As you settle on the stone bench, your ankle throbbing slightly, you peer at the bouquet of daises now cradled in your hand. The delicate blossoms seem to mirror the delicate dance of emotions within your heart, or so your heart believes. Anthony's actions have always been a mixture of exasperating and endearing, and this moment is no different.

"Anthony," you say, suppressing a smile, "your chivalry knows no bounds, it seems." He chuckles, his eyes crinkling at the corners.

"Ah, my dear, a gentleman's duty is to come to the rescue of a damsel in distress, is it not?" You roll your eyes with a playful sigh, though your heart flutters at his words. There's a familiarity between you that goes beyond mere friendship, a connection that has woven itself over years of shared experiences. But society's expectations and the complexities of your own heart keep those feelings hidden beneath the surface. 

"Are you suggesting that I am in distress, Mr. Bridgerton?" you retort, raising an eyebrow. His smile widens, and he takes a seat beside you on the bench. 

"Perhaps not in distress, but certainly in need of a flower-bearing rescuer." He quips, gently nudging your shoulder. You both share a laugh, the tension that briefly hung in the air dissipating like morning mist. There's a sense of ease in his company that you've never found elsewhere, a comfort that stems from him, merely his presence.

A sense of home—of love, and for now, it did not matter if he didn’t feel it, but the warm feeling that enveloped you was merely your own to enjoy.

[viktormaru]

So it stands this ideia i have that Viper is the one closest to understanding Omen’s condition and yet the one to most easily dehumanize him for it. Does it come from a place of fear? A guilt that demands control of the situation ? Like, this time she won't let things get out of hand.

Shes looking out for him, regardless of his input on it, because he's unstable, and she is a scientist.

cause maybe she’s right. Maybe only she can guess what omen’s truly capable of and its terrible, and thats why shed be willing to go the necessary lengths to stop it. Still... pretty fucked up... Just another day with Omen having little agency over his fate and body aahhhh...

And its coming from a place of anguish! Omen is getting closer to figuring out what happened to him and that's been his only life mission ever since coming back from the dead empty and hurt. To say that him having to face his trauma (aka dying in agony and losing his memories in the process) is dangerous to others is... cold... I sincerely hope Viper is wrong, mostly bcs this portrayal of traumatized ppl has become very tiresome in media, but also because Omen has shown he also thinks of himself like that, as something dangerous. I mean, narratively speaking Omen going full on Monster Mode would look pretty fucking cool most likely and is fitting for the action genre that VALORANT is.... But also, it would be cool to have a nuanced little take abt how ppl with mental health problems often hurt themselves much more than they can ever hurt others....... Not expecting that from val but gonna be thinking abt it for fics regardless

Maybe it is bcs Viper knows what happened though, that she knows that him knowing what happened wouldnt help him at all... But then, is that her choice to make? is this about his past at all or is she really just thinking he should move on already? I dont know! Ive wrote a fic abt this part here bcs it intrigues me.

Anyway this is me rambling cause im very excited we're FINALLY getting the real Omen crumbs.... I cant wait to see where this will lead, and hopefully it is to something cool

[bonesandthebees]

im alive (questionable) and im finally back (real) and gods does it feel great to finally read the new rose chapter

I did NOT realise just how MUCH I missed it but DAMN

the crimeboys bonding is going great and theyre doing good in their surviving, im so proud of them

poor phil has to deal with the one thing he cannot control and so he ofc focuses on what he can control, control freak

im enjoying reading about him A LOT, hes so intriguing to me, like yeah so far hes a good character id say, but we get a peak at what he could be capable of and are slowly learning where his priorities and loyalties and limits lie and oh gosh is it fun to watch

and ofc THE BIG MOMENT OF THE CHAPTER: friendly nicknames privileges

and like its a really important and sweet moment in itself and ive been excited for it ever since learning there will be different official names like nikanna and willum and oh did it NOT DISAPPOINT like yesssssss letsgo they are FRIENDS and they let the other call them by their NICKNAMES and it shows how much CLOSER to got and the TRUST and just AHSHSHJSDHBSBSHS YESSSSSSS

and it gets even BETTER bc thats not all, this is a recurring theme with you, whether its a fae name that carries power, a mermaid name that signals family like in last years mermay, knowing a name that reveals the secret identity in superhero aus coming with trust but also responsibility, official and personal names of royals like rose and stars showing friendship or in the other way loss of it, and in glass the reclaiming of self identity thru the reclaiming of name and letting go of a title (which btw the coolest and most genius work with narration ive ever read) you just keep on giving names value in your stories and especially the act of sharing them, the one close to you, with others as a sign of love, even just a little bit and it gets me EVERY SINGLE TIME and the fact its a recurring theme gives it even more meaning, makes it get to me even more

and like its something that happens even in real life in some ways but we often overlook just how much love is hidden in it and I love that it gets to shine like this in your stories

I know we talked about your love for giving names more meaning like this before but I just needed to scream about it again bc IT STILL GETS TO ME

it feels so good to have you back in my inbox (and my ao3 comments) with walls of text like this jiksvokrat

they're doing shockingly well!! shoutout to tommy's survival knowledge wilbur would've been dead by morning without him

I'm so glad you're enjoying the phil pov. I love showing his control issues and how his mind works. he's such a calculating character and I have so much fun writing him

I'm so glad you like my recurring thing with names. I really don't know where it came from, I never had this whole thing with names before I started writing mcyt fic. I think I just really liked it both when I wrote that first fae au fic so many years ago and then when I was writing clinic and there was obviously the whole secret identity thing going on that I just realized I liked the theme and decided to use it where I could.

I just think the act of sharing your name, your identity with someone else can be so vulnerable and full of trust!! I guess this translates to every day stuff as well. like when one of my childhood friends came out as trans to me I felt so happy when she trusted me with her new name and identity (I was one of the first people she came out to). or as a less intense example, part of why I like having an online nickname is that it feels strangely nice to have a name that you guys here can use that's me but also a bit separate from me, but then I have my real name which is reserved for the people I'm closest to (though of course most of my internet friends who know my real name still use bee for me which I don't mind at all). I guess it's kind of like having a public persona vs a private persona. idk, I guess I just really feel the importance of names so I like including it as a theme in my writing.

I'm just very glad you guys aren't getting sick of the whole name giving thing yet lol

[acaciapines]

so....abt that adventure time daemon au....sits down with folded hands. im SO SO curious as to what your thoughts are and lowkey wondering if theyre anything like what ive been cooking up in my twisted mind...slash joke...YOU GO FIRST I WANNA KNOW!!

jkdfgdjfkg yeah im gonna focus on the fionna + cake aspects since thats what i posted but if you wanna know about someone else send a followup!! i have the strongest ideas for marceline and more scattered thoughts on everyone else but!! i turn this around in my head a lot lol.

under the cut bc i am incapable of being short

so. the reason fionna world is Like It Is despite nominally being a human au is bc i decided that in ooo, humans are the only people with daemons! everyone else has Something Else, but that something else isnt actually a daemon (this bit is still fuzzy lol since it would just be more bg in anything i write).

so that means the only characters in adventure time who have/had a daemon are finn (tossing around the name honey for her?? shes unsettled but mostly dogs bc they grew up with dogs lol), marceline (she lost her daemon upon becoming a vampire, gets her back at the end of stakes. do not ask me what she is settled as idk as of now lol), and simon (lost her upon becoming ice king, he does Not get her back. i think its fun if she is a penguin bc that makes ice king surrounding himself w penguins super tragic. he knows something is gone but cannot articulate what.)

also i guess people like susan strong and the humans on the human island but shhhh i dont have super strong ideas for them lol.

ALL THAT TO SAY. since fionnaworld was created by prismo (gonna be real idk what his deal is but he is obviously His Own Thing and as a deity type deal he probably is granted w 'can see dust' powers and thus has no idea what daemons are all about) and lives in ice kings/later simons head (one who doesnt know about daemons and one who is mourning the permanent loss of his own) when fionna and cake were "created" finn jake and finn's daemon were mashed into two characters, who are! human and daemon.

everyone else either never had a daemon in normal ooo (ex. pb) or didnt have them at the time fionnaworld was created and thus they werent carried over (ex. marceline.) of everyone tho probably marshall WOULD know the most, this is why he has a line in my fic where he's like, do you know what i'd do for a weird cat? as a sort of hint that he SHOULD have a daemon, but. alas.

uhhh. where am i going with this.

OH RIGHT so yeah basically when fionnaworld became de-magicked it took with it a lot of people's points of connection--everyone ends up way more isolated than they were. since simon is mourning his own daemon that translates to daemons just Not Existing, and so fionna and cake are very much isolated from each other. they dont have the words for their relationship. all fionna knows is she needs cake with her, and vice versa.

cake IS still a daemon, but without that framework shes stuck in the 'normal cat' role even though she does a lot of noncatlike things, n her and fionna are very very good still at sorta knowing what the other is thinking and reacting accordingly. the people closest to fionna (so, really just marshall and gary lol) have SOME idea of what is up but if asked its more leftover instinct than like, the ability to actually explain any of this. fionna and cake try to interact w the world as a human-daemon pair but that doesnt work when the world has no fucking idea what that is.

uh. that. probably answers some question!! i think the plot of fionna and cake itself is MOSTLY the same...really fionna and cake just find out there is a word for who they are to each other n get that relationship reestablished which isnt a far cry from canon. i really like the stuff they do with betty/simon so i wouldnt want to change that, though i imagine there is a bit of simon mourning his lost daemon too--idk i feel like you could tie those feelings in if you were to write a full adaptation but i!! dont think enough changes to do that so i wont be lol.

i mostly just wanted to do episode one bc again. daemon in a world that doesnt know wtf a daemon is. truly the funniest and most tragic thing in the world.

[ghiautism]

OK also. la squadrer. 🏳️‍⚧️ any gender hcs that stick out to u :3 and 📓🫂 umm hobbies+friendship !!

as a transgender i have transed most of tjem but here’s the full list.,, + bonus what other type of fruit they are bc why not!!!!!! + then hobbies and friendships

this is a long ass post i have autism about these weird freaks!!! there are so many headcanons crammed into one post you guys are NOT even ready for it.! please ask me more questions give me excuses to be extremely autistic PLEAS EPLEAS EPLASE PLEASe

@dykeghiaccio because idk if ur answered ask notifs are also broken uyhjknkjhkj

gender (+ queer) hcs..

risotto: cis + gay but so astronomically babygirl he’s an honorary transsexual. also i made him cis out of spite to my shitty ex so do with that what you will

ghiaccio: the tguy ever + also GAY but more ambiguous about it which i could explain but i won’t because i’m lazy

illuso: trans guy + bi & poly

melone: genderfluid girlthing + t4t lesbian

prosciutto: nb + bi

formaggio: cishet BUT HES ALSO REALLY BABYGIRL SO HE GETS A PASS.

pesci: he’s jsut a little guy. I haven’t really decided tbh.

hobbies

ris: he has SO many!!! he loves to do Stuff all the time and when he's not working he has to occupy himself somehow. he plays bass & guitar and paints mostly, but he also likes cooking (baking too), crochet and just like. Drawing tbh. very creative angled guy he just likes to Do Stuff and Make things. he also really likes reality tv because i think thats funny

ghiaccio: hes not really a "busywork" type person and hobbies very much feel like that to him, so he doesn't do too much. he likes researching stuff and adding facts into his autism repertoire but that's sorta it. unless smoking weed is a hobby then i guess he does that too

illuso: plays guitar & is in a band, and that's his big thing. he's also really into music in general so he spends a lot of time listening to music (like at home and at concerts). also i decided hes a cosmetologist so he does hair as a side gig

melone: similar to ghiaccio but she likes researching stuff, mostly just in her field which is like. relationship and sex stuff. u guys im gonna be so for real with you i haven't pondered Too much what melone would do in their free time. Have a lot of weird sex i guess

prosciutto: very big into reading and fashion, watches fashion shows and reads fashion magazines mostly. likes browsing at stores even if they never buy anything

formaggio: this fucking GUY is so fucking. Guy. he works at a car shop on the side and so he's pretty into cars. he likes classic cars a lot and also drag racing!!!!!!! ive also played around with the idea of him doing tattoos because it just seems so himcore

pesci: hes still just a little guy, u guys. jokes aside he unironically likes to fish and also likes reading. hes pretty reserved usually so he doesn't really tend to do much. likes to sit and listen in on the rest of the team talking sometimes

friendships

but also just relationships between them :3 because i think about this a loooot. i organised this in a way that makes sense to Me so its probably really stupid but like. Cope i dunno

risotto: closest to ghiaccio because theyre GAY for each other, decently close with formaggio by way of ghiaccio, + i have decided one of my ocs is his girlbestie so. yass. other than that, he's pretty neutral on the rest of the gang since they sorta all do their own thing,, sometimes i make him kiss illuso

ghiaccio: closest to risotto for above reason & formaggio because they are boybesties,,, he gets on pretty good with illuso and sometimes i make them kiss but only sometimes as well

illuso: longtime friends with melone, other than that he gets on good with ghiaccio and formaggio and risotto!!! i'd say he's probably the most social of the gang, so he really just sorta gets along with all of tjem

melone: again, longtime friends with illuso, also dating prosciutto and uhh/ Yeah. likes to pester ghiaccio a lot and would probably say they're friends if you asked but they just sort of annoy the fuck out of each other. thinks of pesci as their lil bro. feels very weird and neutral about risotto for reasons that would take a long time to unpack

prosciutto: dating mel, tolerates illuso since him n mel are close, obviously is pesci's older sibling, and respects risotto. is deeply and truthfully entirely loathing of ghiaccio's existence and equally as truthfully forgets formaggio exists half the time

pesci: he honestly respects all of them more than he probably should since these people are all crazy but it's whateva. respects risotto the most, is mildly terrified of ghiaccio because how is he so tiny and yet so fucking scary, thinks of melone as his older sisterthing and that's sort of it for specifics tbh.

[upagainstthesunset]

So sometimes i reaaaallly want to fill out ask memes and a few lovely wonderful friends send in numbers or emojis and its a lot of fun, but part of me is always like "why wait, just answer all of them unprompted, who is going to stop you? No one" So thats what im doing!

This is the list from Ask Game for Ships that i rb'd, and im filling it out for Heartbeat and Metron :3

Putting these under the cut since its going to be looong

1. What’s their love languages?

I want to say time for Metron bc he can travel to past, present and future, and he only spends time on things he deems important. But i think its more specific than that. I think its not one of the standard five. His love language would be mental focus. If he really cares about someone, they will grab his attention and he'll be actually conscious of them whether he likes it or not. But that happening is a rarity. Maybe it's never even happened at all.

Heartbeat's is physical touch. It's about being comfortable and at ease with someone. Its about feeling zero hesitation to let them into your personal space and vice versa. And its most potent for her when it comes so naturally she doesn't even notice shes been doing it.

2. Do they have a dynamic trope? (enemies to lovers, sunshine x grumpy, etc?)

Closest they have is mentor/protege i guess? Heartbeat isnt really his protege though, like shes not trying to follow in his footsteps or anything.

3. Who cooks? Who cleans up? Who’s banned from the kitchen?

Heartbeat doesn't cook bc she doesn't remember how, plus even if she did she doesnt know New Genesis ingredients. And Metron doesn't cook because he cant be bothered to, unless you count a superfood he concocted thats nutrient rich and makes it so he has to eat less often and can keep working on his projects uninterrupted.

4. What’s their favorite sleeping/cuddling positions?

They dont cuddle, but they do share a bed because Metron in his pragmatism figured his bed was big enough for both and then he wouldn't have to find her some other living situation. He quite literally does not care about sleeping next to each other. Its a non issue to him and he sees no intimacy in it. Meanwhile just laying next to Metron makes Heartbeat a ball of nervousness. She gets really aware of his presence. So not really their "favorite", but their typical sleeping position is next to each other but keeping to their own sides.

5. Who does what chores?

There arent really chores, but Metron has a few automated machines he's created to do menial tasks.

6. Do they go out often or prefer to stay indoors?

They go out all the time. Heartbeat gets tired of the lab almost immediately, so Metron takes her around with him to different planets and things so he can continue his work.

7. Who is the more romantic one?

Heartbeat 1000%. Metron is about as romantic as a lump of coal.

8. Do they have any favorite activities to do together?

Getting under each other's skin? When Orion first sees how they interact, hes surprised and delighted at how easily Heartbeat sass's Metron. He needed someone to keep him humble.

9. Baths or showers together? Do they like elaborate ones with bubbles and flower petals?

I dont know if they bathe together. I could see New Genesis having hot springs and not being hung up on separating by gender. But Metron isnt going to be talking any relaxing dips yknow? Hes got other stuff to do.

10. Who drives and who picks out the music?

Metron will absolutely not let Heartbeat control the Mobius Chair. She'll find a way to undermine him about it someday, but that's far in the future im sure. And hmm thats a good question.. does the chair play music? Maybe Heartbeat hums little melodies without really thinking about it, and Metron says it annoys him but i bet he actually finds it endearing.

11. What’s a song that describes their relationship? Or, what’s the song that they’ve deemed “their” song?

I still like the idea of Kiss From a Rose for them even though it makes no sense. Its about The Vibes. And there was some other song that fit their story kind of in a way? But i dont remember what it was.

12. Who gets up the earliest? Who has the worst sleep schedule? Who is the sleepiest?

Neither are sleep-in type people, but Metron really gets up early, so in comparison Heartbeat seems like the sleepy one. But every so often it catches up and Metron crashes.

13. What’s their opinions on PDA?

Both of them are like no thanks

14. Who does fashion shows after a mall trip and who watches and compliments them?

Okay but for real the next scene i have to write is Heartbeat coming out in her New Genesis clothes for the first time and Metron being like yeah whatever idc, which kind of disappoints her. But then on the way back to the lab hes like "it suits you" and like for Metron thats a pretty freaking nice compliment! And later, later in the story she'll have her speedster costume reveal too.

15. Do they go on vacations together? Where is their favorite place to visit?

Same answer to #6. But for favorite places, there is a galaxy that Metron especially likes. He finds a reason to show it to Heartbeat in the first week she's with him.

16. What’s their favorite “domestic bliss” moment? Do they cook/clean together? Do they like to go out shopping together?

They both like traveling in the Mobius Chair together, but Metron would never admit that even to himself, and Heartbeat won't admit it because it'll give Metron a big head.

17. What does a relaxing night in look like for them?

Heartbeat reads while the sounds of Metron tinkering in his lab faintly make their way to the library.

18. What does a date night out look like for them?

Lol no dates for them.

19. How do they silently/subtly express their love for each other?

By accepting each other. Metron is not an easy person to understand, and he is not very accommodating of others. So just the fact that they dont mind each others company is huge. Metron finds it curious that he doesnt seem to get tired of her, but he pushes the thought away quickly every time.

20. What clothes/accessories do they steal from each other?

None. Could you imagine Heartbeat wearing a onesie suit like Metron has?? 😂

21. Which of their friends/family pokes fun at them for them getting flustered/affectionate?

Highfather but subtly and in a good natured way. Lightray doesn't need to even say anything, he just gives a knowing look and a soft smile. I havent talked about it as much, but Wally's in this story too and when he sees them together hes more like "wtf" than he is poking fun lol.

22. How do they apologize after arguments?

When Heartbeat apologizes, it's after introspection and it's always very open and vulnerable, but deliberate and strong at the same time. IF Metron ever apologizes (he doesn't) the best she's going to get is him saying something uncharacteristically kind of nice. He says it quietly without fanfare and then quickly moves on. He doesnt like the vulnerability of it.

23. Do they like pick up lines?

Nah

24. What are their favorite places to kiss on their partner(s)? What are their favorite types of kisses?

Oh my god kissing is out of the question unless we're talking about the fic that id write about this fic. Like, there's all kinds of extra side story stuff i have in my head and yeah maybe things get steamy there but those arent necessarily in the canon of their story. And even for the parts that may be, it wouldn't be for a long time. Certainly not in the first big story arc.

But i mean now that you mention it. If Heartbeat kisses Metron someday way down the line, hes going to study her. He isnt going to hold her in his arms, he isn't going to kiss back, he isnt even going to close his eyes. And shes going to feel so awkward and stupid and annoyed at him. But she couldnt stand it anymore, she had to try it, she had to know what would happen. The whole thing ends up being just so uncomfortable. And the worst part is, it doesnt shake her desire to get closer to him, and she finds it all very maddening.

25. What is their dream home? Do they buy a place together? Who plans the decorations and who does the heavy lifting?

Heartbeat's dream home is the life she doesnt remember. And in all honesty, she builds it up in her head. Theres something about not knowing and having all this alluring potential that makes her think that yeah maybe she had this awesome life. Too bad in reality it was nothing special, but she doesn't know that yet.

And Metron already has his dream home. Everything he wants is here in Supertown, and anything more he needs can be acquired easily. But then one day Heartbeat offhandedly calls it home as well, and something about that shakes him. And he denies it even to himself, but deep down it made him happy. The idea that this is her home and that she would continue to stay brought him some odd foreign feeling of joy that panicked him. He doesn't like the feeling, and he immediately suppresses any further reaction.

26. Do they have any pets or kids?

Nope

27. Who would propose? What would their wedding be like?

Alright hear me out... Metron proposes.

Not out of love or romance, but because he knows that there are social pressures. He knows that he tolerates Heartbeat and even sometimes enjoys her company, and thats saying A LOT. It would be a union strictly for practicality, nothing more of course. Thats what hed say. And he figures itd keep other people out of his business.

28. What’s something that reminds them of their partner(s)? Do they have anything on them daily as a reminder (a photo, phone background, tattoo, clothing/accessory, etc)?

Nah they arent sentimental like that. At best, maybe Heartbeat sees a stick and the mud and goes "hey look its you"

29. What is something they can never agree on? How do they meet in the middle?

Everything? They never agree all the time? Lol thats not actually true. Despite their bickering they actually get along well and when it matters are often on the same page.

30. Free space! Say something about this ship that you want to say!

It's been a fun ship. And anytime someone out there has chatted with me or wow made art for it im like over the freaking moon. Idk why this is where my brain landed, but im in too deep lol.

Its a ship that has some dynamics im not really used to, its unexpected in that way. But its also a ship that has a few very personal familiarities. Not many, but not none. And the thing is, Heartbeat started out as some comic version of me but very quickly became her own thing. Its like watching a movie and identifying with the main character and experiencing the story through their eyes.. but theyre still not actually you, you know? So she is me but she definitely isnt.

And as for being a "ship", its so lopsided and far from the typical two-characters-in-love stuff. Sure unrequited love is a common trope but even that isnt precisely whats going on here. I think to put into words what their relationship is in terms of romantic (or sexual) ships would have to be its own rambling post that i dont have time for tonight.

But anyway, its been good to explore these two and their story. Every time i write one of these big posts about them, and every time i go back and re-read the fic so far, i feel better. I feel good. And maybe this should go without saying, but good is a good feeling.

[ngc-5194]

HIIHIHI omg im glad u liked it !!!! im gonna ramble abt my thoughts more now . yeah basically i just thought of how everyones gone through an entire YEAR of bonding together while she was sleeping and it made me feel a bit insane.! so really most of roxas’ reference points for her would be xion and nami. And speaking of namine, my idea is that eventually the seasalt trio settled into the old mansion and nami joined them, bc shed rather be with the people shes closest to over ppl in radient garden shes had a troubled history with. not to mention her (closest equivalent to a) somebody in a familiar voluntary year long coma for memory reasons. … also . I was just thinking abt how roxas and kairi are actually kinda similar, not only in that they write but also in that they forgot their best friend, and my secret third thing that I wanted to touch on. which is that both had their lives more or less saved by sora, and i think that they would actually both be a little angry that they arent the ones saving sora in return. whispering (i think theyd both share some frustration towards riku.)

kairis issues remind roxas a lot of his and his friends issues so I think he really wants to help her .and i think kairi carries a lot of guilt about sora .while roxas knows he has to move past that to appreciate what soras given him even if hes terrified he’ll never come back

i think post riku leaving for sora is such an interesting time . i think the hope that sora could finally come home is overshadowed by the possibility of losing another friend …. a very weird time of relief and anticipation .im thinking about it

words can not express the full extent of the emotions i felt upon readin gthat snippet or this ask <3333

kairi is,,,,,, i need to dissect her and i know thats kind of what they did to her heart when she was asleep but that's just more reason why i need to do it too. she missed out on a year of people adjusting to having bodies and building friendships and bonding. by choice.she chose to do it. to look for clues on how to bring her friend back yes but still,,,,,, and not only would roxas' only points of reference for kairi be naminé and xion from that year kairi missed but also before too!! they had one (1) conversation and while admittedly roxas only kind of had maybe 2-3 with naminé they were... a little more relevant to him i guess. but also roxas views kairi through the lense of mostly xion and then naminé. most people look at it the other way around. and that concept drives me Insane <33

nami and the sea salt trio living in the old mansion,,,,,,,,,, wjat if i broke down crying for ever and ever <33though maybe they. change a few parts of the basement first because. hooooo. ,,,,, wonder if naminé's drawings are still in that room there,,,,,

the roxas kairi similarities,,,,,,,,,,, and once again they're both still here doing. nothing. while riku goes off to save sora. again. how many times is that now. they can do it, they can help they can save sora too. but they almost aren't allowed to. again. because riku's going instead. again again again.

and even then it's not like they dislike riku!!!!! him leaving to go after sora is. Many emotions because on one hand it's a chance of sora coming back! on the other they can't help with it. and on another there's the possibility that they've now lost two of their friends. and roxas has done that before and it sucked and.

hmnggmgnghhhhhhh they make me incredibly mentally ill thank u for inflicting more of them upon me if you need me i'll be curled into a teeny tiny ball staring into nothing rotating the very concept of them interacting in my head at incredibly high speeds

[faeriecap]

talk to me about steve and nat as best (trans) friends!!!!!

IM DYING BECAUSE I LITERALLY THOUGHT OF THE SCENE WE WROTE WHERE NAT SHOVES ALL THE CONDOMS IN HER BRA SO STEVE WILL TAKE A PAD FROM THE BASKET IN THE LGBT STUDENT CENTER THIS MORNING AND NOW U SEND THIS i love the packer au sm

Our spiritual soul bond anyways

aaaaaaaa i just love them so much like ????? she just! she just always got steve on a level that very few other people did at a time when he needed it most !!!

i’d say that there’s maybe four people in steve’s life besides his ma who ACTUALLY understood how he was as a person fully and got him on an intimate level and ofc it’s bucky, sam, nat, and I GUESS peggy before endgame went and made it seem like neither of them ever knew each other well at all 🤡 also erskine ig before he died rip stanley tucci u were a real one

AND THATS BECAUSE HE AND NAT HAVE A LOT IN COMMON!!! they both go from having people they love and knowing where they stand in the world and in their reality to LITERALLY not knowing anything about how anything works and having NO ONE and having to start over again and AAAAAA just!!! she doesn’t take any of his shit but she knows how to be gentle when she calls him out and she doesn’t want to trust him at first but then he becomes one of her closest allies because she can see how much he reminds her of her when clint first got her out and that he needs people to support him and i’m not crying you’re crying

in terms of them being trans best friends hnnngngnhnhnhngngnhh i love this so much bc it ties into them both being the product of medical experimentation which can lend itself to things like transitional surgery and allegories and omg looking at it from a canon perspective like how do u think it felt for steve to come out of the ice feeling like totally out of touch with modern society esp when it comes to people knowing he transitioned (bc like???? was that PART OF the news released about project rebirth??? or did they cover up the fact that steve was afab and then shield went and leaked it to everyone after discovering his body) and then meet natasha who is for all intents and purposes a modern trans woman versus steve who probably didn’t even know other trans people existed back in the 40s (i mean. maybe. he probably did tho bc HELLO HE LIVED IN THE QUEEREST PART OF NEW YORK UM) idk does that make sense like !!! just her existing in his life probably meant so much to him he probably felt so comfortable and safe around her and wdym they’re not both happy rn hanging out eating peanut butter sandwiches in his brooklyn apartment um ofc they are ???

[mach1ne-g1rl]

Saw your most recent post on dhmis and tma and I've got opinions to say I believe Computers is an Eye episode because Colin's whole deal is stealing personal info and being smart but its not my strongest I see Jobs as a buried because while it doesn't involve much claustrophobia its more about harmful workplaces and overworking which ties in with the buried in a symbolic sense. I will argue so strongly Death is an End episode. The End is LITERALLY the fear of death smh. While I can see the argument its a Stranger because of Stain Edwards the theme of death is so strong that it isn't that relevant. I see Family as both Stranger and Corruption, Stranger because the whole episode feels very uncanny with the design of the family and set being a "real" place. It's also Corruption because the episode is about toxic family relations. I still cannot believe how you thought Friendship was originally a Vast episode. While I can see why you would assign it Lonely it's clearly a Corruption, it's literally about toxic friendships. Also bugs. Tbh i don't know what to assign to Transport my closest guess is Vast but my argument isn't very strong Electricity is a hard one, I don't think i can assign it to one entity. I think Electracey is a Extinction avatar because she's a robot and the "everything in the home will be plugged in and part of the electric family" line. I could see Charged Yellow being either Eye, Stranger or Extinction. Eye because he's want to find the truth and also green eyes, Stranger because Yellow gets replaced, and Extinction because he gets replaced using specifically technology. The power outage is probably Dark because darkness. Lesley is a Web avatar, I will fight you on this. She's controlling them, she's the literal puppet master. You said that Lesley isn't the main one pulling the string making her less Web aligned but I would argue that makes her MORE web aligned because she's knows she's not fully in control. I interpret becoming a web avatar as not only being manipulative, but accepting your lack of free will. As Annabelle said in 147, "let it never be said that I do not dance the steps I am assigned." Sorry this is long and probably sounds a little rude i just have very strong opinions on tma and dhmis have a lovely day

COmputer being eye was also on my first post but i removed it bc i didnt think it was part of the big Fear factor ? but the way you phrased it does make it work

jobs being buried makes sense too !! my main reason for it being spiral is just Duck calling everything out and then Also going weird ? and then going back to "this is all wrong" very strongly (also the episode is reminiscent of Sculptor's Tool to me with only duck pointing out how this is Odd)

death SHOULD be end ur right , i just didnt think anyone in dhmis seemed very scared of the Death there ? so i thought it wasnt very important but Yeah when you mention it its definitely end ty (Or desolation bc it also feels like . theyre more focused on the grief of losing someone n not the Fear of Death ? if that makes sense=? but i dont rly get the End and Desolation anyway so)

CORRUPTION FOR FAMILY IS SO RIGHT i think i considered corruption for it at one point but i second guessed myself enough to remove it again . and stranger never reallly seemed correct to me but it was the closest and i had no one to discuss with so i ran with it:sob:

IM SORRYY LSITEN OK i hadnt listened to tma in full when i made the first list. i just read the entities wiki page and heard season 5 ..!!!! honestly idk if i agree with corruption bc , while thats probably the deeper meaning of the episode (toxic friends) warren always seemed like just an autistic asshole to me so i never saw the whole . toxic thing ? and he never really actually seemed friends with any of them ?? yea taking advantage of their kindness but i wouldnt call it a toxic relationship bc there never Was a Relationship to me (probably factually wrong n im being ignorant here but its my list and blehh :P im biased towards warren) and im probably just forgetting something bc i havent rewatched it in a while but are there bugs besides warren (are worms bugs)?

transport i assigned Web bc red guy being like . aware of the whole They're Trapped There thing and trying to escape and Lonely bc they're trying to get to other people/ civilization/ community but are just . stuck ? and in some episodes the lonely just takes ppl to endless places that they cant leave (cul-de-sac is the only one i remember) and it just (again) reminded me of that

ELECTRICITY /SHOULLD/ be more than 1 or 2 very true but i just Really hate assigning more than 2 to these idk why ive set that rule for myself but it just feels wrong, disorderly and i dont like it . but yes i can see electracey being extinction (tbh i feel like teachers being avatars/ assinging them patrons/fears could be a whole other list itself) Charged Yellow being stranger i disagree. yes hes replaced but it feels more like . if s1 jon got replaced by s5 jon ? does that make sense ? I HAD DARK For this episode too bc the power outage but it didnt feel like a big fear factor here ? and i just didnt think it was significant enough (the dumb self-imposed rule) Lesley IS web coded i completely forgot annabelle for a second when i made this :sob: ive had too much michael on my mind and i thought being trapped wasnt enough of a theme here ? not like it was in Transport or like Dreams but yea it definitely should be Web

IM GLAD this is long i like hearing other ppls thoughts and input on this silly stuff (it did sound a little rude at times but dw i get it) I think at the end of the day the way we judge these is just Very different? Unless you disagree, i dont think the web series is this "up for debate" as the tv show is bc it just has . Less. There's maybe 3 lines at the start, then the teacher comes in and starts singing about what they embody, then the horrors and the end (only the last 3 episodes rly made me question which Power would be associated with them bc it kinda follows a plot so they could all a little be taken as web and lonely with red guy?) Theres just so many more ways the TV show can be interpreted. These could be judged on the Teacher, the Lesson, the thing that scares the characters, the thing that scares the Audience, symbolism/manifestations, etc. (i think i just went with whatever seemed the most relevant to me / what scared the characters ? but i was also being pretty inconsistent there lmao) i feel like there would probably have to be multiple lists or just one BIG list of everything that could count as one of the entities ? or maybe im blowing this out of proportion and its really simple for you, and only i struggled with this :,) either way it was fun ! and i think thats all that matters maybe the real dhmis tma entities assigning list were the friends we made along the way aww

[death-ward]

i guess now that im home and in front of my computer i can actually like type out my thoughts about Dori and whats happening currently and it wasn’t even anything huge. 

its just that everything fucked up that she’s been through is coming to a head and is rupturing and she’s going to have to process it now, no more running away. 

like i think about it and she’s the only member of the original group she started adventuring with...Rorik got turned into a plant man and is currently King Titanias stress ball and Road passed...Their first big arc was them heading to the city of Cleys where they picked up their cleric Patchouli and they almost lost their lives to the bad guy of the arc. Which in turn they ended up adopting into their party as a DMPC...

Then they went to their fighters hometown where majority of his village was wiped out due to monsters. resolved that.

Then they went to the city of Sitka which is a snowy city...She got possessed by a dream hag who almost made her run off a cliff in the middle of the night via sleep walking...then they got involved with the mob and struck a deal to obtain and deliver a dagger to an associate of this mobster. the dagger was in a fucked up resident evil esque necromancy home that was within a pocket dimension...

then on the way to deliver the dagger they went to Doris hometown and ended up in a time bubble and ended up 300 years in the past...and Dori ended up sealing her fate and making herself a tiefling by accidentally striking a deal with Lilith for her future self. She literally could’ve been born human! That’s super funny bc of the disdain her mother holds towards her for being a tiefling especially a purple one in a city that has only red tieflings. So she truly set herself up for failure from the get go. She sealed her fate! And to think about that is really damning to her. She grew up so lonely and feeling like she constantly had to be on eggshells with her mother due to just being her. 

Moving on though after that though they made it to Eden and the Aasimar district there was attacked by a gold dragon and destroyed and Gyael our DMPC was kidnapped, so they went after him. On the way to him she ended up possessed by Patchouli’s demons that follow her and attacked the group. She then got her horn shattered by Rorik trying to knock her out during said possession...then they ended up at the creepy manor where Gyael was being held captive in a mirror realm...but they ended up dealing with a bunch of dead kid spirits and a dead kid pit...like thats fucked up! Once back in Eden she also had her soul separated from her body for a bit in a dream realm and was scared so bad by the BBEG that her and Rorik were almost consumed fully by the visceral fear that they almost lost themselves completely. 

Then finally the last big thing that happened was the fact that her and Road ended up in this demon pit called the Chasm in Patchouli’s village and ended up facing the ‘Goddess’ and Road decided to give up their life to let Dori continue on and help with the help of Lilith...and just the guilt thats associated with that is weighing insanely on her. Because, even though Road called her the heart of the party so many others loved and cared about Road. Gyael was closest to them, Patchouli and them were (almost) love interests, they had a coven of Hags who loved them, they had a kid we kind of adopted who loved them, they had NPC’s that loved them, and all of those people miss them. The only people who would miss Dori would be her sister and Patchouli most likely so to sit there and being alive just feels really...really bad to her. LMFAO 

On top of that we just found out that Gyaels brother Eris was murdered after we had scryed on him and saw him up and walking. The BBEG snatched his body and was headed for Titania who is staying with Road’s hags. Road’s hags also took Road’s body. And you guessed it, the BBEG body snatched Road’s body. SO JUST ONE MORE THING TO ADD TO THE LIST...

This whole time though no one has just taken the time to ask ‘are you okay?’ for her to really think about it and let it sink in, until our new rogue asked her the other day because she sounded short with him. That’s when it kind of hit her that wow, no I’m not okay.

They hired our rogue with a contract to help complete a mission and he wanted context to everything that’s going on with them as bits and pieces keep coming out and just imagining that conversation and how it goes is literally going to make her break down completely and have to step out multiple times and I’m just baby girl....we in it now...because saying it out loud solidifies it. 

SHE HAS BEEN SO STRONG AND SHOVING IT OFF FOR SO LONG AND ITS ALL JUST BUILT UP INSIDE OF HER AND BEING ASKED A SIMPLE ‘ARE YOU OKAY’ SET HER OFF. Her self esteem is constantly low because either Gyael or NPCs constantly berate her or give her back handed compliments, insult her intelligence, etc. She’s never had super high self esteem to begin with. So combination of low self esteem, survivors guilt, and the overall build up just finally is making her break. 

I want her to like have that moment to like really go through it and process it but i hate taking up time during our sessions for stuff like that bc we have limited time and i also dislike having the spotlight on me like that and talking about feelings is hard for her and myself and i get emotional and do not want to!!! LMAWEOGIAHWEOGH

[midnighteloquence]

friendships

i might not use labels for this one since its just self reflection

ive noticed this pattern since probably around mid 2021 but im really i mean reallyyyy replaceable in friendships. as far as i can remember, probably 2016 i remarked to my two best friends at the time that “they walked so fast” and that “im always behind them”. i realise now that thats because they were closer to each other than me

again, 2021, i had two other friends. but to be honest they always seemed much closer than me.but they completely abandoned me, like never paid attention to me. i cried so much because of this, cried to my mum about how “they never pay attention to me”. i got another friend and left them, but that friend victimised themselves in every situation, lied to me multiple times, and was just not a good person.

year after, the two friends i had in 2021 werent as close since one of them left for secondary, and immediately the other one became my best friend. i still like her to this day but we’re really distant and tbh she never hung out with me out of school, something always had to appear last minute.

for my whole life i had these two OTHER friends (who im gonna label bcs yeah: friend 1 and 2) and i was attached to both of them. we kinda had a trio except for most of it it seemed like they were super awkward with each other unless i was there. at some point in 2022 they seemed like they started liking each other more than they liked me. i snapped and had a whole ass argument with 1 and that ended up with us falling out. and guess what? 2 stuck with them. 2 was probably the closest person to me, like literally we were like sisters, and she abandons me just like that? wow

i think because of these experiences i have tons of attachment issues and trust issues when it comes to friendships. recently ive felt as though B is abandoning me, and that if i were to fall out with my friendgroup, they wouldnt follow me, no matter what theyve said.

i literally dk how to end this so yeah

[kooksnovio-archive]

one of the dudes that used to give me so much shit last year for liking kpop runs a tae account on insta now fndkfk i’m gonna choke .

[helpfulbug]

actually wait I MUST also ask, for the blorbo meme ... hoodwinked ... 😳😳😳

OK SARAH YOU DONT KNOW WHAT YOUVE JUST STARTED IVE SHIFTED INTO HOODWINKED MODE

also disclaimer: this is based on the german dub so if i comment on a song or a va just know its about the german version

blorbo (favorite character, character I think about the most)

EASILY the goat i know lesser ppl would put this as glub shitto but he isnt .....not to ME he comes in at the exactly right time hes in it for like 10 minutes and voiced by the iconic jan delay what more can you want everyone in my family knows his little banjo song he does when the landslide hits by heart im not exergarating if anyone does the "oooooh" the song starts w it is MANDATORY that the whole room sings this song and lets NOT forget his actual song its sooo good hes got horns for everyting!!!!!! he was ready for everything yesss king king king king king etc etc

scrunkly (my “baby”, character that gives me cuteness aggression, character that is So Shaped)

honestly idk i dont think anyone here was supposed to be cute.....closest thing i can think of is the fox think playing bass at the skiing contest i always thought it was very shaped and i like the va (they later ask granny for an autograph)

twitchy is ofc also very dear to me but hes not cute imo

scrimblo bimblo (underrated/underappreciated fave)

granny ofc!!! i wouldnt say shes underappreciated in the hoodwinked nation but since hoodwinked as a whole is underappreciated i can put her here....i just wrote a whole paragraph about badass old ladies for genkai so you know!! its everything to me......her riding the muffin backing tin down the lift rope is still one of the most iconic moments in film ever also her design is so fun just sad that not too many ppl on here know about her i feel she couldve been a tumblr beloved character

glup shitto (obscure fave, character that can appear in the background for 0.2 seconds and I won’t shut up about it for a week)

ok so. you might remember the evil ski team the grandma had to fight but. do you remember keith? bc I DO. hes forced to change his name to boris in the middle of the movie bc boingo thinks keith is not scary enough as a name ok pls imagine the name keith in the thickest german accent bc thats what made it so unbelievably funny to my brother and me the rabbit is like "Keeefs you need to change your name" and the fact that his new name is boris only adds to it all since boris was probably the second funniest name to my brother and me right after rüdiger (started w ice age 3 and holds up to today thanks to several german memes w that name involved) basically my brother and me reference this name changing ritual to eachother to this day keith gone but not forgotten but also we would never deadname him boris is also very funny to us also he was yellow and hand the tiktok eboy haircut but in the early 2000s way

poor little meow meow (“problematic”/unpopular/controversial/otherwise pathetic fave)

the lumberjack ofc!!! idk if he had a name and idc in the german dub hes the lumberjack ONLY so. ofc this character is supposed to be german and likely had a german accent in the original. so now the german dub faced the age old problem of how to make this funny in german too and they made the biggest brain decision ever and made im north german. so let me explain the "stereotypical" german character they used here looks very south german to germans (read bavarian) like lederhosen those funny little hat thats all from the south so their decision to have him dressed like that but only as part for his method to get into character for the nose drops add he wanted to be in does so much MORE than the original joke of him being german (im guessing ive never seen this movie in english) the english equivalent of this would be having a cowboy but he has a new york accent or smth

everything that happened to him in this movie qualifies him as a poor little meow meow im sorry but i make the rules

the schnitzel song was very funny to german kids even tho we regularly ate schnitzel its simply a funny word and the way his song just starts w him scream schniiiiittzeeeelll was ofc very funny to imitate at the dinner table

horse plinko (character I would torment for fun, for whatever reason)

boingo i like his character design and all but the way his big plan is to built a monopoly and blow up the forest:/ do you guys remember when capitalists were still allowed to be villians in childrens movies good times good times so yea im sending him down the plinko but i do like him as a villian if only his motivations was to deprivatize the baking sector instead he might have gotten into superhell but well....

also bonus but his german va is in a bit of a pickle rn bc hes part of a big datamining scandal on germany so id say spot on casting!

eeby deeby (character I would send to superhell)

the lizard casting director! he was pretty mean to the lumberjack so down you go my guy!! also gay for sure

GLUP SHITTO ASK GAME

[jungxk]

just one (viii)

summary: the only guy on campus who’s track record trumped that of your best friend’s - park jimin - was jeon jungkook. not that that was a problem…until he set his sights on you.

notes: first of all i wanna thank the people who supported me and encouraged me through one of the worst writers blocks of my life. all the messages and comments are the reason why i finally managed to post this. special thanks to @whippedforkook for helping me with the monstrous tagging process as well as giving me so much praise. and also @lonelyending for cheering me on for a literal YEAR bc thats how long i cried over this fic! this story is so special to me. we’re in the home stretch now x

warnings: mentions of illegal drug use and distribution, swearing, brief smut.

genre: drama, romance, humour, college!au

wordcount: 8k

tagging: @cutechim @benz-biarritz @gyukult @bangulin @eatersanonymous @alyssa1926 @skivv1es @a-sucker-for-them-sappy-shit @moonights @jeymuffins @juuneaux @catsukiii @andreaisaac @whatheydontunderstand @sreveles @noruls619 @henryharios @just-a-fuxked-up-kid @befriendswithj @btsbesharam @poemsandpunani @taelha @misosoup-forthesoul @jikooksmut @heart-eyedmf @the-piano-woman @angrysunshine @chaoticpaperfanhoagie @jsungshine @ci-yen @faby-montana @shinypeanutsportshero @jooniestrivia @alucards-s @cynamyngirl @jiminie-angel @myskoova @jkshoneybuns @smokintae @remmykinsff @majinbuwu @jangx2manboongx2 @potatodogs @seul-queen @alpharyth @blenxxxg @plsky @th-singularity @bapbaptothetop @hermiones-enchantment @stomachfilledwithbutterflies @euphorora @supachloe94 @jiminxjimout @ggukkieland @just-another-fic-recs-blog @jalexad​

part i // part ii // part iii // part iv // part v // part vi // part vii // part viii // part ix // part x

x

4 years ago

x

jimin hated yugyeom.

well, maybe hate was a strong word. he just didn't like talking to him, being around him, hearing his name or interacting with him on any level, social or otherwise. he really tried though, since he was one of jungkook's closest friends and still respectfully referred to him as hyung above all else. and if anything, jimin would always have a soft spot for jungkook, the kid he used to coddle when his own brother wasn't around. but having said that, there wasn't really much basis for not liking yugyeom. it was just a gut feeling jimin couldn't explain, a very subtle callousness about him only jimin could pick up on. for the most part he was just like very other mild mannered boy by day and party animal by night, but jimin still ducks when he sees him enter the library.

"fuck," he hisses under his breath, scooping up his laptop to stride behind a book shelf for good measure. because sometimes, contrary to popular belief, jimin wanted to be alone. he didn't want to make small talk or listen to someone tell him about how well they scored on their last paper or complain about their annoying girlfriend. sometimes jimin wanted to have no thoughts and listen to fleetwood mac as per his human rights. which is why he shoves into the first private study room he sees.

and not an empty one at that. there's a girl inside, sitting cross-legged in her chair at a desk with an array of dried up paint tubes and brushes surrounding open sketchbooks. you don't look annoyed or even that phased, just amused as you give him a once over before going back to painting. "on the run from solji?"

jimin blinks, back still pressed against the door. "huh?" he regards you properly. "i'm sorry, have we met before?"

"not really," you admit with a sheepish smile, which is when jimin suddenly realises that you're...attractive. "solji is in my stats class. you hooked up with her last week at some party and she told me about it."

"oh," jimin takes in your plethora of art supplies. "you don't look like a stem student."

there's a glimmer of something in your eyes, and though you hide it well jimin knows he's struck a nerve. "yeah, i get that a lot."

"it's not solji by the way," jimin clarifies. for some reason. "that i'm hiding from. just a bellend i don't have the energy for right now."

you smile. "it's fine. you don't owe me your life story."

"i do when i'm about to impose on your...study time," jimin peers through the window in the door, wincing when yugyeom enters the hallway. "what would it take for you to let me stay in here for a while?"

you pause for a second. "honestly? just be quiet and leave me alone. is that okay?"

jimin perks up, a weight leaving his chest. "perfect, actually."

x

x

x

[jungkook 11:42pm]: why does it say wings on it

[jungkook 11:42pm] where is it flying

[you: 11:43pm] ffs kook

[you: 11:44pm] im still on the toilet can u just hurry up

[you 11:44pm] grab some tampons too pls

[jungkook 11:46pm] fine what size pussy do u wear

[you 11:46pm] i hate u

[jungkook 11:53pm] ???? ? ? well? ????

[you 11:54pm] REGULAR 

jungkook giggles at his phone, already having left the women's sanitary aisle to grab some chocolate. months later and teasing you was still bundles of fun. he knew for a fact that you were sat there with that angry pout on your face, nose crinkled. he had never bought anything like this before, but jungkook had enough brain cells to know that chocolate was another necessity for that time of the month. after grabbing a large hazelnut bar, he pauses beside the oreos before grabbing a packet of those too. just for good measure. he strides to the self checkout - because even he wasn't man enough for the cashier yet - nearly dropping his array of sanitary products and confectionary when somebody calls out his name from behind the queue.

"kook!" the voice is unmistakably yugyeom's, confirmed by the hand that clamps jungkook over the shoulder and swivels him round before he could think about hiding his socially compromising shopping items. it takes a second for yugyeom to notice, doing a double take at the pads atop his small tower of goods. he holds back a laugh, balancing a bottle of gin in one hand while he waves back at some friends to continue. they were clearly making their pit stop before a night out, probably pre's if they still start as late as jungkook remembers. with his hair styled and expensive cologne lingering, jungkook almost forgets he probably looks unrecognisable in his sweats and cotton-fresh hoodie. friday nights weren't for cuddling. still, yugyeom's smile is welcoming and familiar. "got the munchies? and maybe also a uterus?"

"shut up," jungkook grumbles, averting his eyes. he shifts to his other foot uncomfortably. "my friend just needed a favour, that's all."

"uh huh," yugyeom gives him a teasing look. "is this friend the reason why i barely saw you at jin's the other week?"

jungkook blinks back at him. "wait, you were at that party? i had no idea!" a boyish smile breaks over his face. "why didn't you call me? i haven't seen you since-"

"minseok-hyung's new years eve party," yugyeom throws his head back with a laugh. "remember how we ended up on a boat after the ball dropped and-"

"spent all of new years day detained by the coast guard!" jungkook finishes with a mischievous cackle of his own, nearly dropping the tampons in the process. "fuck, that was so much fun! we need to meet up again, i haven't been out with the guys in so long."

"well no wonder," he quips a brow at jungkook's shopping again. "word got out you're a family man but i didn't believe it. until now, that is."

jungkook's smile falls. "what do you mean?"

yugyeom looks at him for a second, confused by jungkook's surprise. yugyeom was never quite as diplomatic as namjoon or yoongi, to put it lightly. and definitely nowhere near as accomodating as jimin. which is why his next words make jungkook's back stiffen. "bro, look at yourself. you got dairy milk in one hand and tampax in the other. on a friday night. the next time i see you i wouldn't be shocked if you had a baby buggy and a mortgage." still, yugyeom throws him an apologetic look. like a mouse caught in a trap. "face it, kook. you're old news."

"what? that's not true," his brows furrow unhappily. "i don't know what you're talking about. it's not like she's my..."

he can't say the word, but it hangs between them like a dead weight.

"yeah, right," the condescending look on yugyeom's face was starting to agitate him. "you totally blanked us at jin's after she showed up. not even just jin's..." he thinks twice about holding his tongue, but as always, decides against it. "i don't know you, jungkook. whoever this new jungkook is. it's been months. you used to hit us up and be independent and spontaneous and wild and now you're just...someone's boyfriend.

"stop fucking saying that," jungkook snaps, all visible signs of friendliness gone.

"why?" a beat. "do you even use a wrap with her anymore?"

jungkook splutters, heat rushing to his ears and hands in a stinging combination of anger and embarrassment. "how is that any of your business? the fuck are you asking me something like that, as if you-"

"thought so," yugyeom looks away from him with a sigh. if anything, yugyeom knew never to overstay his welcome but that clearly backfired tonight. "whatever, jungkook," he looks over his shoulder at him. "guess you're the last one to find out you're officially married."

"you're ridiculous," jungkook scoffs. "all this over condoms? grow up, yugyeom."

"only couples do it raw," yugyeom turns away from him, alcohol in tow as he waves a hand over his shoulder to join his friends like jungkook was nothing but a lost cause. "you would remember that if you still had game."

jungkook stands there, dumbfounded while the group of boys exit the store noisily but he can't hear a thing. the siren that had been itching the back of his mind all this time was suddenly there at full force, right between his eyes. the glaring truth that yugyeom might be right makes his knees buckle. all those rules jungkook once had, all those measures he kept in place to protect his liberty, to prevent this very occurence - where were they? what happened to them? as the sweet and accommodating counterpart to jimin, why had you never complied? though, the blame wasn't on your hands alone. he got complacent, comfortable. lenient. and now without even realising he was here, a scene from a romcom in the middle of the night, with nothing to say for himself but fuck. the realisations wouldn't stop racing, one after another on the conveyer belt of his anxiety.

the photos on his phone; mostly you. time spent, usually with you. the portfolio for his latest photography module also had some resemblance to your interests. charcoal pencils, night drives, orchids. like the ones you always drew on any scrap of paper lying around. now that he thinks about it, he's seen nothing but your orchids for months. and not just that - you wore his clothes sometimes too. his bathroom had your toothbrush, contraceptive pills and coconut shampoo. his closest friends, his hyungs...not one of them was devoid of affection for you. he wasn't even confident that if the choice was presented, they would still pick him over you.

by the time jungkook finishes paying and practically sprints to his truck in a daze, he can hardly keep himself from shaking. he palms the wheel compulsively, he could feel the sweat in his sideburns, hoodie suddenly suffocating him. it smelled of you.

and then, like a final curtain call: was he just your latest fixer-upper project? some good girl wet dream to play out in the wake of your emotionally traumatic past? a slap in the face to seokjin, maybe, and nothing more? when you were done, when he was out of your system, when you knew his taste by heart and had nothing new left to try - would you stay? did you even know how to?

did he?

jungkook starts the engine. he drives to your door, drops your bag of snacks and pads on the porch, and texts you before leaving. he does not go inside.

x

x

x

"you sure you'll be okay with just the boys?"

you scoff at seulgi when she pins you with a worrying look, taking some of her clothes out of her bag to re-fold them just so you had something to do with your hands. jisoo had already left for the long weekend with her family, so there was no one there to fill up the empty space between your awakward reply. you didn't know how to tell the girls that jungkook hadn't contacted you in nearly a month. and even though he was a notable flight risk from the beginning, you couldn't help but feel like there was hostility there. every now and again he'd at least send a nude or have a quick phone call when he was drunk or high at three in the morning, but you hadn't heard a peep from him. you couldn't stand the idea of someone you cared about harbouring comtempt for you, but the fear of reaching out and somehow making the situation worse outweighed it tenfold. 

you look up to see seulgi still staring at you with concern. "of course i'll be fine! they're boys, not piranhas."

"at least piranhas contribute our ecosystem. boys just cause problems for the hell of it," seulgi lays a hand on the crown of your head like a berating big sister, swivelling you to look at her in your fit of giggles. the urge to nestle you under blankets like a baby bird made her chest heave, and you could tell. "i'm serious. if jimin tries anything, call me immediately okay?"

"jimin?" you snort. "out of a room full of delinquents, my ex, and taehyung, you're worried about jimin of all people?"

seulgi wrinkles her nose. "god, when you say it like that its like i'm throwing you to the dogs." she pauses. "something's up with jimin. i don't know what it is, but he's...off."

you tilt your head innocently, remembering the brief interaction you had with hobi at seokjin's party. you had been so caught up in jungkook - or lack thereof - you hadn't thought to press him about it afterwards. in truth, jimin remained as...jimin as ever. if he was acting differently you certainly couldn't tell. "you think so?"

"mmm," she leans on the lip of the open suitcase thoughtfully. "but maybe with jungkook there, he'll behave himself."

you gulp, fiddling with his watch on your wrist anxiously. "maybe."

x

x

x

you nearly yelp when you feel a big hand swivel around your waist, bucking into the kitchen counter reflexively. jungkook always did this before rubbing his boner against your ass, but the light scent of citrus and short squeeze lets you know immediately that its taehyung. hoseok, jimin, namjoon and yoongi were still in the living room playing video games, giving taehyung the perfect opening to intercept you. namjoon and yoongi had insisted that you come over to their place after finding out you'd be alone for the weekend, and you had completely refused before taehyung's coaxing. and of course, jimin's persuasive nudging. even though you felt safe and relaxed here, it felt wrong to be in jungkook's friends' place without him. almost like a breaching of an unspoken boundary.

and clearly, taehyung picked up on your discomfort by the way he stared at you so softly. his back was to the sink, his sillhouette particularly long and lean this evening. "you need to lighten up, princess. you keep looking over your shoulder so much it's making me nervous!"

your visibly droop with a sigh. "i'm sorry tae. i've had a lot on my mind lately, and..."

he claps his hands on your shoulders, teeth peeking through his grin. "you're not doing anything illegal by being here without jungkook."

you wince at his name. "have you always been able to read my mind like this?"

"absolutely," taehyung's brown eyes look so rich up close. "you're allowed to have friends that are also his friends, because - and try to stick with me on this - relationships between people are allowed to be independant from the primary circles they met in. mind boggling concept, i know."

you wack him on the chest until he laughs. "stop making fun of my anxious thought processes! its called mental illness, sherlock! i can't help it!"

his nose scrunches cutely, enjoying your first fiery outburst of the day. "whatever. i call it not getting laid for a month and losing critical thinking abilities from it."

you gape at him indignantly while taehyung roars with laughter. "you're such a dickhead," you hiss through gritted teeth, yanking his hair and jabbing your fingers in his sides the way you would with jimin during a tickle fight. "whores have feelings too, taehyung! whores have feelings too!"

you both fall about with laughter, knocking over half the snacks on the counter in the process which only makes the pair of you laugh even more. it's such childish chaos trying to clean up the mess on the tiny kitchen floor that neither of you notice the front door open, or the gust of metaphorical and literal wind that follows. watching taehyung trying to salvage a bag of broken crisps is just so funny that the presence of an another voice in the living room goes unregistered, as do the footsteps leading up the hallway to the kitchen, so you have no time to brace yourself or properly pull yourself together with you see-

"...jungkook."

yours and taehyung's heads snap to the doorway. jungkook stands there with almost complete lack of emotion on his face to the pair of you kneeling in crumbs and napkins. there's a brief pause where the tension in your eye contact alone was so strong that it felt wrong to breathe. but it is shortlived. jungkook tiptoes over you like spilled milk, reaching for a glass of water. you and taehyung lock eyes while the tap runs in the awkward silence. "hey. you okay?"

"um," you're not sure whether to stand up, hug him, look at him, or even face him. "yeah! yeah, i'm fine."

he nods politely. "hyung?"

even taehyung looks visibly uncomfortable. "i'm good."

"cool. see you later," he says, downing the glass impressively fast before leaving the room just as fast as he entered it.

you and taehyung stare at each other again, not understanding why you both feel like kids caught eating cake before dinner. you could feel the sweat pricking at your back from the realisation. jungkook had no idea you'd be here, and given that interaction he'd probably want to leave now. there was always the inkling woven between his radio silence that he was done with you, but you never let yourself take it seriously out of logic. because how could months of passion and tenderness and honesty be undone so irrevocably like that? it didn't make sense. you hadn't changed. you were the same girl he hit on relentlessly and chased against all odds. so what was different now?

"____," taehyung calls your name gently, and it's only then you realise you're already up and trailing after jungkook into the living room. when you walk in he's already putting his shoes on to leave again, barely making eye contact with you while he chats absently to his hyungs so he can look busy. the four boys on the large sofa can only reply wearily, eyes darting between the pair of you like a firework was about to blow to soon. and it was.

you could feel it in your throat, under your breast bone, bubbling up your stomach. "wait, jungkook. um...h-how have you been? i haven't heard from you in-"

"i've been good," he keeps tying and re-tying his laces without looking up. "super busy. you know how it is."

his curtness makes you flinch. this same time last month jungkook used to kiss you senseless before he had both feet in the door. he'd ring the doorbell incessantly like a child and greet you with the biggest, toothiest grin you had ever seen. he'd make fun of your bed head and squeeze your cheeks until you'd snap at him. and now when he looked at you he hated every second of it. your mother had the same look. your eyes start to burn involuntarily. "yeah, i do. how is uni? your final project is due soon, right? what theme did you pick in the end?"

"the one i told you about," he stands up abruptly. "sorry, noona. something came up. i'll see you arou-"

"something came up?" you step closer to him. "something came up the second you saw my face? or did you really just trek all the way to your hyungs' place for a glass of water, jungkook?"

jungkook stiffens, but is determined not to lose face. and it's difficult to do under your big, accusatory eyes and jimin's death stare at his back. the whole room was waiting for his response, so he just shoves his hands in his pockets resolutely. "i needed to see yoongi hyung, but i can come another time."

you fold your arms. "well it's clearly important, and you're here now. so don't let me stop you."

"but you will stop me," jungkook snaps. "that's the problem."

"kook-ah," yoongi warns quietly, but he took one look at your face and knew the damage was done. jimin was already standing up, circling around the back of the sofa towards you. the red lights were all there; your watery eyes, your trembling hands. every breath you took looked difficult for you to complete and only jimin noticed.

"what are you talking about?" you squint. it takes you a second to understand; yoongi's guilty expression, jungkook's indifference. "oh, you're fucking kidding me." your resolve breaks for a second turning away only to glare back at jungkook with so much fire you can hardly stand it. "you're selling again? are you insane, jungkook?"

"see," jungkook's eyes are stony. "i knew you'd get this way."

"what other way am i supposed to get?" his lack of response only infuriates you more. it felt disrespectful. "jungkook, you're not a kid anymore. if you get caught with drugs the consequences are serious! forget the potential jail time, you could get kicked out of university, it would go on your record forever and-"

"stop talking to me like i'm a kid!"

"then stop acting like one!" you hate raising your voice, but it keeps climbing without your approval. "did you think about this for even five minutes? this isn't like just going to juvie like before and being done with it jungkook. your hyungs can't bail you out of everything."

"this is a lot of talk for someone who lapped up those fancy paints without a second thought," jungkook says darkly. his eyes aren't like you remember, his face solemn and near unrecognisable. "or did you think that getting that kind of money overnight is only something that's possible through daddy's credit card?"

dread blooms like a garden inside you. "that's...that's how you bought the paint set?"

"welcome to the real world," he quips. "as if selling overpriced weed to a bunch of pick-me-freshmans is considered a crime against humanity to anyone but you."

"you think that's why i'm yelling at you right now?" your voice was growing hoarse, desperate. "you think that's the problem i have with you being literal drug dealer, jungkook?"

he hates it. the sweltering silence, the judgmental eyes digging into his back, the slow realisation that the tears in your eyes were not at him but for him. jungkook's ears ring enough to make him sway on the spot if his feet weren't planted so firmly on the dingy carpet, this metaphorical ground. he couldn't shake the feeling that his lifestyle was only an issue now because of you, how he never felt a shred of guilt about any of this shit until he met you. and if there was anything that jungkook never responded well to, it was pity. and he could feel it from every person in the room, all people that that once cherished and coddled him until you came along. he swallows, throat dry from the way he couldn't look at you knowing what he was going to say next.

"you're embarrassing yourself, noona. you're not my girlfriend and you never were, so stop acting like it."

cotton. it's very faint, under the layers of conflicting cologne and beer and smoke, but jungkook still smelled of cotton while he spat acid. nobody could speak, even though jungkook never raised his voice let alone a hand to you, it still hit like a slap in the face. it sunk into the walls, your clothes, suddenly every hair on your body felt heavy with it. dirty. the shame came first, the humiliation next. and then the sorrow, the dread, and finally the defeat. you knew the stages well by now, and they were cycling through you like clockwork. how foolish you were, to make the same mistake again. nobody dared to move, everyone but jungkook staring at you in denial and horror. they couldn't believe their eyes when you nod steadily, bowing your head to the floor.

jimin is already slotting himself between you, his jaw tight. "that's enough, kook. just leave already."

"no," you stop him, unnervingly resigned. that single word cuts through all six men with ease. "he's right." you step around jimin, closing the space between you and jungkook. for a brief moment he wonders if you'll actually hit him, but somehow watching you unclasp his watch from your wrist and drop it on the coffee table in front of him is far worse. the sound seems to ring like church bells, definitive and umistakable. "you're right, i'm not your girlfriend. you win jungkook."

they all watch you leave in dismay, listen to the door closing softly behind you. within a second jimin sprints after you, calling your name, leaving everyone else dumbfounded. jungkook's stare could bore a hole into the abandoned watch on the table, still ticking away like nothing changed. like his eyes weren't burning, lightheaded at the realisation that he would never wear a watch again let alone the one he put on you.

x

x

x

to an outsider, you looked like you were coping well considering you just got dumped in front of all your friends. but jimin knew that face. your stony eyes, lips pulled thin as if to seal inside the collapse of a monument. you took the tea he offered, and then his arms, your face finding his chest with ease. muscle memory. his torso was a tad shorter than jungkook's, his heart closer to your mouth as if the steady thumps were asking for a kiss of acknowledgement. every time you close your eyes you could see jungkooks face, hard and unforgiving and nothing like the man you trusted all this time. but it wasn't a new expression; you parents looked at you similarly the last time you saw them. it was the look of someone who had no regrets cutting all ties. and now, jungkook was behind them in a lost list of people who chose to be strangers over loving you.

jimin sighs when you cry into his chest, brushing the back of your head gently. he had been ready for this for months, but he still hated to see you this way. again. it made his bones itch, his skin crawl uncomfortably every time you weeped. the only time he considered violence was when you were crying. but he knew what to do, laying down across the sofa so you could curl up into a ball next him, head on his bicep and face smushed into the crook of his shoulder. you used to cry like this for hours and hours, his arm familiar with the prickle of pins and needles. but it was the only place you felt safe. tucked into jimin's side is where you would always belong, and that truth was more glaringly obvious than ever now.

"lets get something to eat," he offers eventually, hand craddling the crown of your head like a child. jimin's other hand on your hip is warm and heavy when he pats you soothingly. in your episodes, you responded well to touch. "what about thai food?"

"not hungry," you grumble against him.

"we could make something together?" he peers down at your lack of response. "come on, babe. you gotta eat something. you didn't even have breakfast-"

"why am i so stupid?" you whisper, a fresh bout of tears welling up.

jimin rubs your thigh. "it's not your fault."

"yes it is. jungkook gave me plenty of red flags, and i ignored all of them-"

"oh, i meant you being stupid."

you scoff. "cheers."

"what?" jimin cocks a brow when you lift your head to look up at him. he wets his lips and you follow the swipe of his tongue thoughtlessly, distracted enough by his touch and proximity that you take a second to digest his words. "it's not like any of this exactly came as a surprise. you ignored me, remember? wanted to flex your big girl pants."

you pull away from him and sit up, forcibly shutting out the daze that jimin routinely puts you under. "what's wrong with you? can't you be polite and wait for a couple hours before laying into me like a normal person? jesus, jimin."

"so let me get this straight," jimin sits up, watching your back as you sit away from him. "you're mad because i'm not telling you what you want to hear?"

"no," you say, head shaking. "i'm not mad. i'm upset because i came here to be comforted by my friend and you're just making me feel worse."

"what do you want me to say, ____? that i had high hopes from the start?" jimin pushes his hair back, brows now at a sharp incline from frustration. "i told you starting something with jungkook was trouble but you didn't listen. why should i feed your victim complex when all i've done is try to help you?"

"victim complex?" you repeat, standing up slowly. the sudden steadiness of your voice causes jimin to panic.

"not like that. don't take it like that, it's just," he's suddenly before you, his warm hands palming up your arms warmly. "i didn't wanna see you get like this and it happened anyway, is all i'm saying." he sighs when your scowl doesn't let up. "if hobi hyung hadn't have given up so easy, then maybe…maybe this would never have happened. maybe if i had been harsher with him then you would have-"

"what are you talking about?" you ask quietly, searching jimin's face. "give up so easy? what's that supposed to mean?"

he looks away, hands slipping off you. "it's nothing."

"jimin."

he struggles to look at you, tongue in cheek. his lips purse for a moment, pink like roses. he's wearing that navy jumper you like. "look, it's not a big deal. he wasn't supposed to fuck you or anything, just take you out for a while. get your mind off kookie, show you a nice time."

your blood runs cold. "what?"

jimin's expression softens. "it's not as bad as it sounds-"

"really?" your voice is sharp, sharper than he's ever heard it. you recoil as if you had been struck for the second time today. "because it sounds like you asked some guy to keep me occupied like i'm a fucking dog. all because you can't stand the idea of me being within a meter of jungkook-"

he steps in, but you step back. "you know that's not true, _."

"don't i?" you scoff, covering your face in disbelief. "jimin, you've been hellbent against me even looking at the guy since day fucking one."

"because i didn't want you to get hurt!" jimin counters, eyes downcast. "i know, okay? i know how much of a dick it makes me sound, but its not like it hurt you when you had no idea! hoseok broke it off before you even knew about it so why-"

"because it's worse," you turn away from him. "you tried to control me. choose what's best for me because you think you know better than i do. sound familiar?"

his jaw sets, and it's like you can hear the twine snap in his head, the percussion of his heartbeat above yours even though he doesn't close the space between you. jimin stares at you for a long minute before drawing in a thin breath. "fine," he steps in, and you can't look away. "you want me to say it? fine. i'll say it."

suddenly the air is lace thin around you as you stare at him, waiting. jimin looks off somewhere else, somewhere you can't reach. "don't tell me you haven't thought about it, because i know you have. if i have you must have too. and lately its all i can think about - being with you, holding you, being the one who gets to touch you. and yeah, maybe it took having to see you with jungkook for me to realise how much i want all that, i put my hands up. but you have no idea what's it like to watch the person you love most get toyed around with by a time bomb like that. i've seen jungkook go through girls like underwear and i love him, god i love him, but even the idea of you being one of those wasted girls sitting outside a party crying over his sorry ass makes my fucking ears ring."

"j-jimin…" you whisper, but you have nothing to say. your hands shake.

"you deserve more than that, ____. you deserve more than waiting around for booty calls or living up to what the next guy wants. from jungkook, hoseok, anyone. you deserve someone's devotion and yeah, maybe all this time i've been too much of a pussy to give it. maybe all this time i was tiptoeing around my feelings for you because i knew if i admitted to myself that i loved you - if i admitted i was just like every other guy - i'd actually set the bar for something other than disappointment. id actually have to step up, and i didn't know if i could do it. i still don't. but if it has to be someone…it should be me."

suddenly he's holding your hands, calming the tremble that rattles them. his words bunch up together in your ears, the meaning lost amidst your awe. "jimin….jimin what are you saying? where is all this coming from, i don't...i don't understand wh-"

"i'm saying," he cups your face. "choose me." he pulls you in. so, so close. "choose me, not jungkook. not anyone else. me."

and there's a part of you that has already caved. that's already kissing him, melting into his arms like you've wanted to for so, so long. you're falling back onto the couch with him in a fit of giggles, curling back into his chest to hide your watery eyes, asking him why the fuck he took so long. you chat together between teasing kisses, pour your hearts out, maybe cry a little. later you would make tea and order pad thai and watch the office all night and fall asleep together in the living room well past dawn and then-

you close your eyes. "i can't."

"you can," jimin says, so passionately you shudder. his brown eyes are teaming with too much determination and ardour for his own good, and you both know it. its difficult to grapple with how huge a risk he's taking, because jimin never takes risks. it made the whole situation seem dire. "you know you can, ____. it's us. there's no one like us."

you don't know how you're not crying yet. you only have jimin to hold onto, hands balled in his shirt without knowing if you're about to push him away or pull him in forever. "maybe back then. maybe if you'd have said all this before," you feel empty, the beat of your pulse suddenly strong in your fingertips. "but it doesn't matter anymore."

he shakes his head in denial, his determination palpable. "of course it does-"

"i'm in love with him," you say. to jimin. to yourself. to the world, finally. "i'm in love with jungkook." holding jimin's stare isn't as difficult as you thought it'd be. "you know if you'd have done all this a few months ago…if you'd have just...i was always yours without question, jimin. and you knew it." it's his turn to bristle under the strain of your voice. "jungkook isn't perfect. i'll be the first one to admit that. he's made me cry, he fucks up, he makes mistakes. but he's never lied to me. he never made decisions for me. he never passed judgement on what i should or shouldn't do with my life. something that i never thought i wouldn't able to say about you, too."

there's a brief moment where everything stops. neither of you can believe what you just said. jimin watches you, frozen in his place as you take your bag, eyes glittering with tears when he calls for you. suddenly he's the time bomb he feared becoming, the panic in his eyes lighting them up like fire crackers. for the first time in his life, he stumbles over his words, and then his feet when you reach for the door, all composure lost. he was unravelling like a tapestry in front of you, never to be repaired, and he could feel it. "____. ____, please," jimin chokes, his cheeks blotchy. "i wanted to protect you, i was just trying to help. don't go. please don't go. i was trying to help you."

"no. you were trying to have me." you say, closing the door behind you.

x

x

x

you have no idea what time it is when you hear the bell ring incessantly.

it had been hours since you'd returned home from jimin's, but there was no way for you to keep track when your only priority was just keeping yourself afloat. you turned your phone off, drew the curtains, and resolved to alternate between sitting in seulgi and jisoo's rooms until they came back. you didn't know what else to do. when you weren't crying you were hyperventilating, and when that stopped the absence of emotion was so powerful you could barely keep your eyes open. you were exhausted but could not sleep. starving but could not eat. it was a miracle you even made it down the stairs, using what little strength you had to yank it open without even thinking about who could be on the other side in the middle of the fucking night. but at this point, you would gladly take a serial killer over jimin or jungkook.

"taehyung," you breathe when you take in his face, relieved. you must look like absolute shit because he scans your face and winces. 

"jimin told me," he says, the apology in his voice and expression was almost painful to register. "he told me everything. ____, i'm so sorry. i should have told you about the hoseok thing, i just thought it would be worse coming from me, and then i tried to force jimin into confessing but then he didn't because he's jimin, and now-"

"you're only allowed to come inside if you stop apologising," you say weakly, voice haggered from the hours of crying.

taehyung's pouty expression almost makes you smile with how cute he looks, gingerly stepping over the threshhold. "i really am sorry though."

"for what," you say monotonously, closing the door behind him while he takes off his shoes. "my inexplicably terrible taste in men? my uncanny ability to get manipulated by literally anyone who shows me a scrap of affection? or my absolutey shredded-to-shit attachment style thats barely intact let alone functioning healthily? after hoppping between the first two for a few hours i'd personally go for the latter. but whatever."

"please shut up," taehyung sighs, bringing you into his arms before you could have a second thought about it. "you need to amp up the misandry in this context. a lot of this had nothing to do with you and everything to do jimin and jungkook."

you're too tired to open your eyes, snuggling into the softness of taehyung's chest. you’re too exhausted to argue. "where did you learn the word misandry? have you been reading?"

"yeah," you can hear his big, pleased grin. "i know you and the girls have been calling me a himbo behind my back."

"affectionately," you add, peering up at him. he wipes the wetness off your cheeks, moving upstairs to your room with your hand in his. he fetches you a glass of water before putting you into bed like he's paid to do it. taehyung was the cuddliest person you had ever met, but you had rarely seen him dote on anyone. "girls love himbos. it's a compliment."

"not all girls," he mutters when he returns from the bathroom with a glass of water. "drink this, would you? you look so dry it's making me itchy."

you do as he says with a roll of your eyes. "what do you mean?" you finish your water with a big gulp. "jisoo loves dumb guys, what are you talking about?"

taehyung looks away from you, bottom lip rolling up under his teeth so fast you barely catch it. he pulls up your desk chair next to your bed, thinking long and hard before meeting your eyes again. "i don't mean jisoo."

you don't understand at first, but after staring at his face for a long minute your stomach drops. "don't. don't you fucking dare," another beat of silence. you rip the covers off you to scamble to your knees, grab your pillow and hurl it at taehyung's head. "taehyung, please don't tell me that the one remaining, healthy relationship i have with a man has also been shot to shit because i swear to god i'm gonna-"

"it's not a big deal," he says firmly, and he really does mean it. taehyung catches your wrists when you lunge at him, effectively ending your outburst before it can begin. he keeps hold of them while he stares into your eyes, watching the way they fill up with a fresh bout of tears. "i've had a crush on you for a while, so what? it's not anyone's business but mine so don't worry about it."

you try not to scream at him. "how long?"

"...since the start." he shrugs. "it's not like i could have done anything anyway. with jimin around. he’d never have it."

"but...! but..." you splutter, the highlight reel of your friendship suddenly marred before your eyes. "but you let me talk to you about boys! you gave me advice with hobi and jimin and jungkook and...! you encouraged jimin to confess to me. and the whole thing with jisoo?"

he wets his lips guiltily. "jisoo is a nice girl. i like her, but...not like you. i've always liked you."

you shake your head in horror, your face crumpling. bile rose in your throat. "so all of that...playing with my friend like that. was just to get to me?"

"listen to me," taehyung says firmly, gripping your wrists to make you look at him again. he's so close you can feel the warmth of his breath on yours, and you never realised how large taehyung's torso was compared to yours before. he could have smothered you, but he didn't. in all senses. "the way jimin and jungkook handled their feelings is on them, just like how this is on me. it doesn't matter if i'm fucking you or not, you're my friend and i'll always want people to do right by you. and that includes me."

there was nothing else to say, so taehyung wordlessly wipes your face again and fetches you more water before retreating to sleep on the couch downstairs. all the while you sat there in your bed, confused and bewildered and thoughtful. the same bed jungkook fucked you on. the same bed jimin held you in. out of all the men in your life, taehyung was the only one who treated his feelings for you with reverence. there wasn't one interaction you could think of where he made his feelings clear, where he even hinted towards wanting something more. if he hadn't have said anything tonight, in the wake of one of the most emotionally tumultuous days of your life, you would still be in the dark about it all. and that was the scariest part. you didn't know anyone else who hadn't let their feelings for you effect how they treated you. so ultimately, it was possible.

and jimin and jungkook chose not to do that. but taehyung did.

taehyung did.

when you finally pad downstairs after hours of ruminating, jisoo's bedroom door is wide open. and that's who you should be thinking about now - your friend and sister jisoo - as the sky begins to lighten with the signs of morning. you hadn't slept for over twenty four hours, you were hungry and thirsty, delirious from the whirlwind of losing the two most important men in your life in one day. but still, you are drawn to taehyung. taehyung, who never asked anything of you. taehyung, who was as silent as he was selfless this whole time. taehyung who routinely put what he wanted aside in favour of what was best for you. taehyung, who protected you without needing credit or recognition for it. taehyung, taehyung, taehyung, taehyung, taehyung-

"taehyung," you whisper scraping your nails through his hair. his eyes fluttered open, twisting his head to face you as you hovered above him. he could barely see you in the darkness. "taehyung, wake up."

"what is it?" he croaks, sitting up with half-lidded eyes and a yawn. he doesn't know how to read the expression on your face. he swings his legs off the sofa in a sitting position, wearing nothing but his boxers and tee, visibly alarmed. "what happened? are you okay?"

you take his face in your hands and kiss him. 

taehyung stiffens against you, breath drawn thin. you pull away to gauge his expression, desperately searching his eyes in the darkness. for discomfort, disapproval, anything negative at all. the absolute ardour you find instead could knock you down if taehyung didn't reach for your neck, kissing you again. you whine at the feel of his tongue, having no idea where such sudden and intense arousal was coming from. when you pull away with shaky limbs, you climb onto his thick thighs so he can feel your wetness through his boxers. taehyung grunts at the sensation, and again when you kiss him passionately and without abandon. the sweet girl every guy he knew was agonising over, suddenly in his lap. he's barely had his tongue down your throat for ten minutes and you're already rocking into him, his erection betraying his resolve.

it's better than he dreamed. 

"taehyung," you gasp, palming him now. he groans when he pulls away to look at your mouth, glistening with his saliva when you take his hand and guide it down to your arousal. "please."

[vitaman-b]

FOR THE ASK GAME: UHHH I REALLY LIKE SUNSHINE CHARACTERS. AND ALSO THE ONES THAT ARE KINDA ASSHOLES AT THE START BUT SLOWLY GET SOFTER AS TIME GOES ON

OH GOSH U REMEMBER WHEN I RAMBLED TO U ABT,, I THINK I CALLED THEM HOLLER?? yeah ive named them luka. also i used them for a dnd campaign but completely changed their character soo,, im just gonna call the og holler to svoid confusion.

BUT HOLLER FITS SUNSHINE BEST.. kinda. Ive explained them in ur dms but BASICALLY they never just.. “grew out” of that childlike personality, opstimism, boldness etc, they get teased for it alot n their confused bc like.. how did they change?? But they have a friend who i think i nicknamed shadow? who likes them better when their happy, so they just kinds figured “maybe THEIR the dumb ones” and as such kept up a positive persona despite their mental health slowly deteriorating for a number of reasons. Either way, they act alot like the sunshine personaloty, always beinf a pool of endless opstimisim, regwrdless whether they beliefe it themselves. They refuse to drop the mask. and try to be as positive as they can on the inside.

It just.. doesnr work.

… why are all my ocs so angsty i ddint even cover half their angst

ANYWAYS in terms of assholes.. hm, havent had one in a fuckin while,, i guess, another oc from the same story as holler, we’ll call her ummm.. mars. MARS is a real piece of fuckin work, princess of a corrupt kingdom, her father is also, a real piece of work, and her mothers gone. Mars main friend snd really… her lifeline is another oc, who we’ll call cacti. BUT the kingdom they live in was really, really shitty. Cacti wanted to make a name for himself, but the society he lived in hated him and overall were just… real shits towards him because of that. As such, cacti eventually just.. snapped. He asked Mars if she wanted to leave with him. Mars, who was terrified of beinf abandoned, said no. She had connections here, she was *safe* here, despite how shitty it was. Cacti leaves anyways, he cant pur up with the place. Mars is pissed off. Like, really pissed off. Cacti was the only one she was sure wouldnt leave her.

Yet he left.

And as such, starts her spiral into being a lil shit. She hates her father, she hates the kingdom, but she hates cacti more.

The kingdom made cacti leave.

But cacti left. Cacti left her.

She is royally pissed off.

Cacti comes back with two new friends, Shadow and Holler. Mars is more pissed towards him, but their part of a rebellion against the throne, she soon learns. She hadn’t known of this rebellion prior.

She hates the king.

She joins it.

Therefore, her and cacti are forced to talk it out. Its a real shitshow. Cacti is pissed that Mars didnt want him to leave, that she wanted to keep him in this shitty kingdom, Mars is pissed that he left her, and had the nerve to come back and say that he was in the right.

Despite that, the rebellion is nice.

She likes rhe rebellion, its okay.

She starts to see people like her there, and despite still being a little shit towards cacti, she starts to act more softly around other members.

But thats not exactly what u asked for, but its the closest ive got. I wouod elaborate but this isnt fully developed. Also youve learned of this gang before and im SORRY but uh yeah their the most devoloped of my main ocs rn