#and if they arent any of those they probably smoke or drink

[ineffablelvrs]

pretty convinced i cant keep friends because im fucking boring and every single human interaction drains me

[weirdenbyferret]

Party and Sad clowns

ignore the fact that i forgot the nose on the sad clowns anatomy

Tips and such on the party and sad clowns below 👇!

Party clowns and sad clowns are two of the most common and similar types of clowns, and they can sometimes be mistaken for one another, but usually you can tell the difference as party clowns usually have brighter colors and poofs on their legs, meanwhile sad clowns usually have poofs on their arms and dimmer colors.

Party clowns are often the clowns you think of when you think of parties, and they tend to be the ones at parties as they are usually the ones most capable of dealing with parties, able to keep everyone entertained without losing too much energy.

You should not get one just for a party, then get rid of them, as they are living thinking beings just like you, they should be treated with respect, and their purpose is not only entertaining people at parties.

If you dont want to keep a party clown but still want a party clown, you can hire someone to bring their party clown instead of buying one yourself.

If you do that, you should pay both the owner and the clown itself, for the owner money of course, and for the clown many treats and perhaps some praise as well.

There are many types of party clowns, though the most well known is the common party clown. Though, there are also some types that do well for specific kinds of parties, like the common party and scare clown mix, the halloween party clown, which as you could probably tell usually does well at halloween parties!

Party clowns are usually the best clown to go for when you are a beginner, as they are usually the easiest to take care of out of most kinds of clowns.

Party clowns and sad clowns may look very similar, but they are very different.

You may feel some sympathy, seeing a sad clown sitting, sighing in a sad tone and frowning softly, but dont worry, it is perfectly healthy for them to be like that.

You only really see them smile whenever they are truly very excited about something or when they feel very cared for and loved, though it is a small one, but you can always tell.

Though you should make sure that they are a healthy amount of 'sad,' you should still interact with them, preferably in a gentle caring way.

Usually, just sitting together in silence is enough, but whistling a tune together or reading a book or two together would also be good.

They also tend to like helping, so its a good idea to bring them with you when you go out shopping, as they tend to like helping with simple things like that.

They also tend to dislike feeling like they arent doing anything around the house, and feeling like they are being lazy, so its a good idea to let them do some chores.

They also tend to like doing tricks where they purposefully fail, so you should try to keep them from things such as tight ropes, acrobatic equipment, trampolines, and the such as their natural instinct is to fail and trying to fail a trick on any of those could result in injury.

Though they are Sad clowns, there is such a thing as being too sad for them.

Signs of being too sad are the signs of depression, attempting to starve themself, hurting themself, and developing an interest in smoking and drinking, which are just as unhealthy for sad clowns as it is for anyone else.

If this ever happens, you should try taking them outside a bit more, giving them more of their favorite items and foods, perhaps some hugs or cuddles, and you can also give them bubble blowers as a substitute for cigarettes. In case you dont know what im talking about:

These often give good results, as sad clowns tend to find much enjoyment in blowing bubbles from these, and if you have others clowns they tend to like blowing bubbles at them and watching the other clown/s chase and pop the bubbles.

If you were planning on getting one of them, or if you are now, hope these tips and such helped!

[kurjakani]

They symbols section for those of asks with Preyer? They look really cool :3

*doodle for sleep question :D

Copypasting my short info of Preyer from my oc blog here for clarity: Preyer | stole a banned, self replicating, injectable nanotechnology known to transform bodies beyond recognition. Shares this with their followers, a rag tag group of bodymodification enthusiast.

details about ocs! - ask game

🎶 MUSICAL NOTES — what type of music does your oc like? do they listen to music very often?

HMMM i don't think Preyer themself GRAVITATES towards music as a freetime activity, however I do think they like it and that a lot of their followers/friends like it! So, since they all spend a lot of time together, Preyer ends up listening to a lot of it.

As for what- Preyer loves everything abrahasive and grating, looks & audio & sensation wise so... nails on chalkboard music. Probably a lot of scifi noise music!

💯 HUNDRED POINTS SYMBOL — share three random facts about your oc that others may not know.

They speak easier with their original mouth, and they hate that fact. Despite having two mouths, they only have one tongue! Their original face kind of slots over their mouth, and they slip their tongue into the original mouth cavity to use it to speak. They can speak with their new mouth, but it's pretty garbled.

They collect insects, both dead and alive. They still pin them as a hobby!

they were originally a character I made to ship w gyutaro LMFAO >:D liked their look too much and now theyre a machine girlie instead of a demon

💤 SLEEPING SIGN — is your oc a light sleeper or a heavy sleeper? how are their sleeping habits?

SUPERB sleeping habits. They spread out all of their limbs, relax and slack. They're a tosser and turner, and a big sleeptalker. They love sleeping w a lot of freedom since they go through a lot of "holding their body in one piece" to hide their transformation from non-friends. They wear corset-like pieces to push the seperated parts of their legs etc back together. They sleep a lot, actually, also. Eeper mom.

🔱 TRIDENT EMBLEM — can your oc swim? do they enjoy swimming?

Honestly probably not? The town in homebound is a very rare move for me where there arent any (non frozen solid) bodies of water nearby. Yes there are swimming halls, probably heated underground, but swimming is kind of an optional skill, and it's really hard to teach preyer anything they have no reason to be interested in. Their biomechanical body IS WATERPROOF, they wouldn't get electrocuted or anything, but its also a lot of thin long limbs that would get tangled up and not make for very good paddles.

🔺 RED TRIANGLE POINTED UP — does your oc know how to use any weapons?

Actually had to think about this, but yeah i think so! :D preyer seems like they'd be a bit of a gun nerd. All futuristic stuff ofc, but still.. However they're more of a blades person.

🔶 LARGE ORANGE DIAMOND — does your oc know cpr? do they have any other medical expertise?

Oh, ZERO true medical knowledge. They almost avoid it subconciously. I do think theyre aight w first aid though, it's nessecary as the transformation they& their friends go through causes a lot of tearing, and makes for very easy infections. Anything further, Miulu takes care of for them.

🚫 PROHIBITED — does your oc drink/smoke? do they do it regularly, or is it more on occasion or for special events?

HMMM actually a lil tough to say. I would say Preyer likes the taste of alcohol and the smell of smoke but it's really hard to imagine them drunk? They don't want to admit it but they like being in control too much for that.

TYSM FOR ASKING & LETTING ME RAMBLE ABT THEM!!!

[carvinglittleholes]

okay ik im autistic but i heard The Band's song The Weight on a commercial last night n it was a cover so i was like what the fawk those arent my canadian sweethearts n i got kinda :(( but then i was like that song is so hugely fucking popular anyway idrc also holy fuck i have something stuck in the back of my throat i think it's a tiny coffee ground. there was this episode of curb your enthusiasm where Larry gets a pubic hair tangled around his uvula i feel like that rn I GOT IT FINALLY okay... had strange experiences the past two days. i just want to dive into the mystic. but i close my eyes and im in shopping centers and auditoriums and motel rooms and i cant tell if these places are worlds away from my own interpreted by my imagination or if everyone's heads contain portals to other places. i keep getting nauseated from reciting the parentheses pattern <[()()][()()]><[()()][()()]> and only when i travel into my mind through the mystic i feel i can actually breathe from it, i was standing in the shower yesterday and i realized id been puffing short breaths in the shape of the pattern, its hard to explain but i count when i chew and breathe and walk and drink and smoke to make sure it all fits in the pattern and after doing that all day it gets sickening. as ive been saying lately music is overpowering any painful urge or mentality i come across like some aural amphetamine, when i listen to music i want to cry because of how beautiful it is and every lyric spells out twenty thousand different words that flood into my head and illustrate themselves as seperate places that i visit each time i listen. thank you to Van the man for writing Caravan and Into the Mystic and Tupelo Honey, thank you to The Band for writing It Makes No Difference and Stagefright and The Night They Drove Old Dixie Down and The Shape Im In and for sacrificing your 1976 thanksgiving for The Last Waltz (thank you so fucking much i wish i could meet you all), thank you to Neil Young for writing Helpless, thank you to Jeff Mangum for writing On Avery Island and My Dream Girl Dont Exist, thank you to Metallica for firing Dave and sparking the spiteful flame of a guitar genius, thank you to Dave for... being yourself. i can't express my love enough for the music i listen to. i know it's stupid and crazy but i hear these songs and i feel the history of everyone playing and singing and i feel it dragging down their souls like anchors, i feel their love and expression in waves of sound, its an energy transference that exceeds ourselves as human beings, human interaction, we all are transformed into vessels being the only thing cementing our souls because music does everything in its power to release what lies beneath your skin, together we will gooooo intooo the mystiiic... mom agrees with me about the energy transference between performer and crowd so im very curious if there is anyone else who listens/views music in this way. lexicons in the infinities, what songs bring you into the mystic???? yesterday i was driving and i found myself in ghost towns I'd never been through before and everything was new to me and the radio was ringing my ears and I felt the way I do in my mind, free under the sun released unto the earth in all its green and blue and wind carrying spirits and answers. so i know that this feeling is real, this world and life are real, the people i know are real and that fear is for now silenced. I've never felt so human. and im freeeeeeww freeee fallinnn (I don't even rlly like that song) but also It's like I feel my soul moving as a seperate entity in my body, I am PREGNANT with MYSELF... jk but dunno probably gonna draw and write and watch concerts today. btw there's this interview with Robbie Robertson talking abt the death of Levon Helm n he was like "at his hospital bed I held my brothers hand and told him I'd see him again" or something like that n I wanted to cry. angels in human form. once human now spirits in flight. I rlly want a Limp Bizkit shirt or like one with Kid Rock giving the finger on it

[cruecifymesixx]

Love and Leather /Part Eighty Sixx/

Word Count: 5.9k

A/N: Enjoy! sorry the updates aren’t as often like they were before. I’ll try to do better

Warnings: angst, drugs, language, drug induced paranoia 

Taglist:  @miserablecunt , @dangerous-like-a-loaded-pistol,  @a-simple-salmon,  @hi-my-name-is-riley, @extremesadnerding, @thatbandchick39, @awkwrdcait, @countrygirlswonderland, @awesomealmostdopestudent, , @tashy-bear, @krazykatkay456, @terror-triplet, @shouttatthedevill @beachystars, @rodriguez025, @kickstart-myheart-sixx, @s-outhie, @anxious-diabetic, @awkwardblackgirls, @vintagebox @shamelessobsessions, @jerseytaint, , @criminalyetminimal, @motley-queen, @trapt-in-a-dream,  @broke-n-bitchy​,  @lovesick-heart0, @keepcalm-and-beyou, @miriampraez, @teenwolflover28​, @lilyhw1, @herbertweeest, @random-internet-user-4471, @falcon-arrows, @talranocchia2001,  @waywardprincess666, @iluvmesomemarvelndc, @zoenicoles, @vamprlestat, @supersoldierballerina, @electradestiny, @marshbev, @n0-sh0rtage-0f-faults, @cruebaby, @ggorehorror, @valentines-in-london, @nassauartist  @cmft-jr-winchester, @bokkie92, @notworthyofyou1120 @xrosegoldwolfx, @mgkobsessed, @chaoticvybe,  @kellysimagines @thoughtsoftheantagonist , @sleepyjunhong  @meetthesixxter @sparxx27 @gingerspicetalks @kaitieskidmore1 @unknownoblivion @nevergoodenuffbutokaaayyy @sublimeprincesswasteland @kylieinwonderland @haileynicoleseavey17 @lavendersoundbarrier  @xxisxxisxxis, @dogmom2014, @cruesixxlover1991, @xpoisonousrosesx,  @m0rnlngstar, @love-struck-aries, @youretheonlyonewhomakesme,  @i-want-to-shoot-myself, @arianareirg, @fentitrbl, @patheticgay69 @rocknroll--baby​ @redlipscrystalskies14, @samanthadegaro @jd-johndeacon-or-jackdaniels @thechangingme, @idkmanhereisshitilike, @makaelahdelvalle

Nikki held my hand tightly as we walked through a crowd of photographers. Quickly, he wrapped his arm around my shoulder and pulled me closer to him, my hand darting up to his chest, fingers intertwining with the layered rosaries and the same padlock necklace I had gotten for him years prior.

I heard Nikki mutter a curse word when photographers screamed for pictures and a quick word. Nikki declined but allowed them to take pictures of us. We were at the album release party and there was already a buzz about the music. Mainly because they wanted to see if Mötley could do it without Vince.

We walked inside hand in hand before he quickly let go and put distance between us. I frowned a bit but quickly perked up when Alan Kovac came up to him, "Nikki! Congratulations man." He gives him a quick hug "All the hard work has paid off. C'mon let's celebrate." He's quickly pulled in another direction, I see him glance back at me before he starts talking to Alan and the other suits. The record label, the marketers...those people.

I sigh deeply as I walk over to the open bar. At least I had an excuse to go shopping and get a new dress. I order a vodka soda with lime as I sip and people watch. I didn't know half of these people and I'm sure Nikki felt the same way. I should have just stayed home with Arianna however I wanted to make an effort in supporting him like a good girlfriend should do, or whatever I am to him.

Ever since my date a few weeks ago, Nikki has been extremely distant. I know he wants to talk about it, and I do too but we both don't know how to bring it up. So the best thing we know how to do is ignore it and act like it didn't happen. Therapy was a bust the other day too, we sat in silence for forty five minutes. How much longer can we keep doing this?

I get tired of sipping through the plastic straw and toss it to the side, chugging the rest of it before putting the glass down and ordering another one. The bartender tries to make small talk, I brush him off and leave before walking over to the VIP area where the band is. Cigarette smoke from John and Mick hit my face, I would usually say Tommy too, but he's trying to quit before the baby gets here.

I sit down in the red velvet chair besides Clementine, "That's a pretty dress. Where'd you get it?" I smile at her.

She leans closer to my ear, "I got it at Target."

God bless Clementine for not being like the other wives and girlfriends.

"It's probably the last cute dress I can fit in for the next six months. I've already been gaining weight."

"I think it's just you stress eating and not pregnancy weight." I smirk as she flips me off and playfully hits my shoulder, "What are you drinking?" I point at the red liquid in a martini glass.

"A virgin cosmopolitan." She points at mine, "Vodka soda?"

I nod, "Double the vodka." I glance seeing Nikki come over, he eyes the spot next to me before changing his mind and opts for sitting by Corabi instead. I look at him a moment before looking back at Clementine. Her eyebrows raise in question as I take another long sip.

"Let me just take a guess, he's bitter over your date with Jon?" Clementine questions as I roll my eyes, "He needs to get over it. This was the deal, you both date someone else and decide if it's what you want. It's not that hard to comprehend."

I chuckle at her words, "You would think right? The only time we talk is at the dining table with Arianna and who's doing pick up duty. Other than that, there's no interaction. I even walked around the house in my underwear and one of his shirts and he still wouldn't talk to me."

"Have you tried being the bigger person?"

Well, obviously that would be too easy.

"I don't know why I have to be the bigger person. He's the one that's all cranky about it. I stopped giving him shit for Donna after their second date. He just doesn't like when I play his game better than him, he never has." I express to her as she chuckles.

"God, you two are a match made in hell." Clementine laughs, "Forget about all of that tonight and just have some fun. You're kid free and it's an open bar. What more could you want?" I glance at Nikki as she follows my gaze, "That's beside the point!"

I smile a bit, "I'm fine Clementine. I'm here and I'm having fun."

"You're always just fine, Van."

I glance, "Because I'm fine. I'm good." I look over when Nikki gets up, holding his cell phone to his ear before he disappears into the crowd, "I'm gonna go use the restroom. Maybe get another drink and some food. You hungry?"

Clementine chuckles "Do I even have to answer that?"

I nod, using her knee as a crutch to get up. I squeeze past people before I get to the restrooms, seeing the line and groaning. I eye the men's bathroom for a second, not seeing a single line or a dude walk through the doors. I clear my throat walking past dirty glares and eye rolls as I walk into the bathroom.

"Oh fuck.." I turn around seeing Corabi taking a piss, "I'm sorry John."

He laughs a bit, I hear the noise of his zipper before the flush of the urinal, "It's okay. There's nobody in the stalls." I nod quickly, walking into it. God, men are fucking disgusting. I squat over the toilet doing my business as I hear him wash his hands before repeated sniffing. I hear him mutter a "shit" before more sniffing. I flush the toilet and step out seeing him using his car key to take a bump.

"You want some?"

My mouth runs dry and the angel and devil are arguing on my shoulder, "I didn't know you used." I step over paper towels on the floor and go to wash my hands hearing him sniff again before pinching the bridge of his nose.

"Just socially. Helps with my anxiety." He responds monotone as he looks at me through the mirror. I see his eyes wander down the backside of me as I reach to dry my hands.

"Does Nikki know?"

"Why? You gonna tell him?" I shake my head and he smiles, "Good girl." He offers the bump to me as I stare at it.

C'mon. Just go ahead. Look out how little that bump is. It won't do anything to you.

I shake my head, "I'm okay John. Thank you though." I step to the door but he steps back and leans against it, "I should get back to-"

"Nikki?" He laughs, "Arent you two fighting right now? He's bitched about you for weeks now."

"John, you don't know what you're talking about. We're just having a disagreement." I stare at him, watching him sniff the white powder again.

Go ahead. Just say yes. You know you want too. C'mon, what's the big worry?

John laughs at me as he shoves his curly strands out of his face, "I guess dating other people is a pretty big disagreement."

"It's what he wanted." I raised my voice, becoming stern as he smiled at me.

"Hey sweetheart. It ain't any of my business." John snorts one last key bump before closing the vial and puts it back in his pocket. He grabs the door and holds it open, "Ladies first..."

My feet stay planted as I stare at him, he raises an eyebrow before closing the bathroom door, "One bump and that's it." Johns lips tug upwards as he pulls out the vial, "And you don't say shit. It stays here in the bathroom or I swear to god I will ruin your fucking life."

He doesn't say anything in return just a simple chortle as he dips the silver key into the vial. I hold a nostril close as I snort it up quickly. The whiz going straight to my head. I feel my heart beat throughout my body and the goosebumps rising on my skin cause me to shiver. I try to rub away the irritation, sneezing repeatedly right after, "Thanks.." I see that he holds out another one I sigh and snort it in the other nostril.

John chuckles as I wipe my face. He opens the door and follows behind me.

I feel Corabi's hand rest on my lower back as he gets us back over to the bands section. I stop walking seeing Donna sitting next to Nikki, her tan legs draped over his knee as she clutches a fruity drink with an umbrella. She's whispering in his ear and he laughs at whatever she said. His hand is placed over her knee, rubbing up and down her bare thigh, fingers pulling on the bottom hem of her skirt.

I glare at them, feeling my wrist being pulled on as my name is being shouted over the music, "What did you say?" I look at Clementine, eyes low and hazy as she stares at me.

"I said...what took you so long!?" She shouts a bit, dragging me over to the booth as I can't take my eyes off of them. Donna leans over and kisses his cheek and jaw as he as the biggest smile plastered on his lips. I feel my chest heaving up and down as I try to find a solid breath of air to suck in. Clementine touched my cheek to bring me back to her and away from the looming panic that was slowly rising.

"Sorry, the bathroom...the-the uh line was really long." I stare confused again as I now hear Donnas high pitched laugh over all the other noise. Why? Why was she here when I'm here? When he held my hand and held me close when we got here?

"And no food?" Clementine laughs. How could she be laughing? Does nobody see what's going on? My eyes widen when Nikki gently grips her throat, his thumb running over her skin back and forth as he kisses her. His eyes stay opened and locked on mine.

"Why's he doing that?!" I shout, startling her as she turns to look at what I'm yelling at.

"Who? Whose doing what?" She asks confused, staring at me concerned, "Vanity? Hey! Look at me!"

I can't rip my eyes away, Nikki smiles at me when she kisses his neck and touches his exposed chest, "Don't you fucking see her kissing him?!?"

"Whose kissing who Vanity?! Jesus Christ are you drunk already?!" She pulls me to the side but I try to fight her, "Vanity! Stop!"

"Nikki!! He-he's just!!-" I try to get it out, but my words are a jumbled, slurred mess.

"....is getting his picture taken with the band?" Clementine says in my ear as she points over to them. Huge smiles on their faces as they hang off of one another laughing and yelling as flashes from cameras go off.

I blink a few times, staring. Nikki sees me and waves at me. I look over to the couch, no one was there, "What?" I say quietly as Clementine grips my arm and drags me out the back doors. I feel relief wash over me as the cold air hits my skin.

"What did you do?" She shoves my shoulders, "What did you do Vanity?!" She shoves me again until I'm leaning against the concrete wall. I feel the world spinning around me, Clem is a distorted mess as she yells "What did you fucking take?!"

"I-I didnt..." I can barely focus on the three of them that were standing in front of me "Oh god..." I mutter as I run my hands through my hair.

"Don't you dare lie to me!" She shouts, "You look sicker than a fucking dog and your eyes won't stay still!"

I rest my hand at the base of my throat, I felt like I was choking on nothing as I try my hardest to focus, "B-blow! I had some blow in the bathroom! A-and I-I think I'm h-having a bad reaction!" I stutter over my words, trying to keep my tears in.

"Yeah?! You fucking think?! God Damnit." Clementine groans as she paces around before grabbing my hand "C'mon-" she tries to pull me back inside.

"No! I can't go inside! Not while he's with her!!"

"What?!" Clementine stares at me, eyes narrowing, "What are you talking about? He's not with anyone-"

"Yes he is!! I saw them!" I flinched, breathing rapidly when Clementine cupped my cheeks, "I-I saw them. And they were kissing and he was looking at me to make sure I was watching!! Why would he do that?!"

"Van-Vanity hey! Hey! Listen to me-" I shook my head as she forced me to look at her, "Nikki is not with anyone. You're just seeing things and none of it is real. It's just your mind making you hallucinate. None of it is real-" She repeated, "Let's go inside and try to relax, alright? We'll get some water and some food."

"None of it is real..." Clementine nodded as I shook under her hands, "Okay..."

*Clementine’s POV*

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck!!!!

I held onto Vanity's arm, feeling her tremble as we walked back inside. Her jaw muscle was clenching and unclenching repeatedly. I looked down at the crease of her elbow hoping to find a prick mark from a needle but there was none. I guided her back over to our section as she plopped down on the couch, hunched over with her head between her knees.

"Okay. C'mon, you gotta sit up or someone's gonna ask questions." I told her as she leaned back against the cushion, pupils blown with greens and golds lit up around them, "I'll be right back, okay? I'm just gonna get us some water." Van looked panicked but she quickly nodded.

I glanced at her one last time before walking away, seeing the guys at the bar. Tommy smiled, running up to me and giving me a kiss, "There you are!" He cheered, wrapping his arm around my shoulder.

"Hi baby." I leaned up to kiss his cheek "I'm just getting some water for me and Van.." I tell him, he yells at the bartender to get one water and one Jack and coke, "Tommy..."

"It's too early for her to be drinking water." He whistles loudly and yells for Vanity as loud as he can, "Go bring her over here! She needs to celebrate too instead of moping around." He laughs a bit, "Vanity!!" He shouts, cupping his hands around his mouth.

I glance seeing her watching, she slowly gets up...well stumbling up as she comes over, "Jesus, maybe she does need a water..."

"Tommy...she fucked up.." I say in his ear as he looks at me.

"Well yeah! I'm sure she is a little fucked up by the way she's walking." He laughs loudly again and I grow frustrated with him.

I grab his arm and pull him closer to my height, "No Tommy. She fucked up. She snorted some blow and now she's having a bad reaction or trip or whatever the hell it is. She's hallucinating." I tell him over the music as he stares at me for a moment before glancing behind me. I turn around seeing Nikki sitting in a chair laughing.

Tommy walks away from me as he goes over to Vanity, wrapping his arm around her waist and helps her walk straight. He brings her over, blocking Nikki's view as he helps her up onto the barstool. He reaches over the bar and grabs a bottle of water and forces it into her hand "Drink it now or I dump it on you." He tells her sternly, I see the gleam of fight in her eyes, but she does what she's asked to do anyways.

Tommy turns back to me, "We need to tell Nikki." I suggest as he stares, before laughing.

"Baby have you gone nuts?! That's gonna be world war three! Just let her relax. She's just having some coke induced paranoia, she'll come down from it in a little bit." I move past him when I see Vanity struggling to keep her head up. I place my hand at the base of her neck and glare at him, "She could be overdosing Tommy."

"She's not foaming out the mouth and she isn't seizing. She's fine. I've seen her snort two eight balls in one night and obviously she lived. She's clean and sober and it's probably a shock to the system." Tommy laughs a bit, taking a sip of his beer as he looks at me, "What?"

"Is that suppose to make me feel better?!"

"Please don't fight over me. I'm sorry..." Vanity slurs as she looks at us, "I just wanted something to make me feel better."

"It's okay, Van. Just try to relax." Tommy sweet talks her as I slap his chest.

"It is not okay! Just sit there and be quiet. And pray to god Nikki doesn't feel like making things up with you."

*Nikki's POV*

My eyes wandered a few seats over seeing Tommy and Clementine laughing with Vanity. An empty pit formed in my gut as i watched them for a moment. I was only avoiding the situation because she was avoiding it too. I rubbed my face before ordering a Jack and coke and a vodka cranberry for Van to break the ice. I pop a piece of gum into my mouth before grabbing the drinks.

I strutted over, seeing Tommy and Clementine bickering about something before they turn to me, staring intently "What?" I glance at them before sitting in the chair next to Van, placing the glass in front of her and resting my forearm against the back of her chair.

"Vans actually done drinking." Clementine announced, "I told her not to eat that shrimp cocktail."

I glanced at her before Van "Are you okay?" I spoke against her ear as she nodded quickly.

"I'm okay. I feel better now. Just got a little woozy is all." I catch a bit of her slurring as I watch her reach for the glass and take a sip, the ice cubes shaking and clinking as she holds the cocktail. I glance down at my watch, we had barely been here for 2 hours.

"Do you wanna go home?" I ask softly, pushing a strand of hair behind her ear, "I've talked to enough people and don't mind being home with you." I touch her shoulder and feel her tense up.

She shakes her head, looking at the counter of the bar and not me, "No, it's okay. I promise I'm fine. I guess I just drank too much to fast. I'm good Sixx."

I nod, leaving it at that but I still look at her worried. I notice her hands shaking still as she grips the edge of the bar, "Van, look at me a moment." She quickly glances at me before looking past me, "Please look at me. Just me." My eyes wander behind her seeing Tommy and Clementine looking at me, Clementine nervously chewing on her thumb nail as Tommy had a look of worrisome.

Golden eyes find mine, pupils blown but I don't react as I can see tears in her eyes. She knows that I know and that's enough for me. I put my hand on the side of her cheek, she was flushed and burning up, "Keep it together." I spoke sternly as she quickly nodded at my words.

"I-I I'm sorry.." she stumbled over her words, "I'm so sorry Nikki." My thumb catches the tear that rolls down.

"Just keep it together, okay? Only for a little while longer."

Vanity takes a deep breath in and exhales through her nose, "Okay...I can do that. Then we can go home?"

My lips curl in a smile, fighting back every derogative word I wanted to scream in her face "Yes doll, then we can go home. You sit tight, get some water and relax." I tell the bartender to give her a another water bottle before I glare looking at Clem and Tommy.

I leave Vans side, motioning for the two to come over to me, "What is she on? Is it coke? If that's the case, it's the calmest I've ever seen her than."

"W-what do you mean? She's on something? I had no clue.." Tommy stammers as I give him a look.

"Cut the shit. Is she using again?" I look at Clementine, begging for answers as she shrugged.

"I don't know Nikki. And I don't know what she's on. She wasn't making any sense and she started crying then she was hallucinating. She needs to go home Nikki."

I laughed "Have you fucking lost it? Arianna will still be up. If she's hallucinating here she'll be hallucinating at home." I look over at Van seeing her reaching out for something that's not even there, "Fuck. Just keep her distracted or something. I don't want her ruining anything tonight." I sighed in frustration running my hand over my face as I let out a muttered fuck, "I gotta step outside for a minute. Just keep an eye on her, please."

~Next Morning~

I jolt awake, gasping for a breath as I push and kick my comforter off of me. I wipe the sweat from my forehead before holding my stomach, god I felt like I was gonna hurl. My bedroom door is thrown open, the handle hitting the wall as Arianna and Anarchy come running in.

"Mommy!! I'm going with auntie and uncle Tommy today!" She announces pulling herself onto my bed and sitting on her knees in front of me, "Daddy said she's on her way to get me."

I rub my eyes and smile looking at the bun Nikki put her hair in "Is your backpack ready? And your shoes picked out?"

She nodded feverishly, "Yes! Daddy did it and told me to come wake you up to say bye." I run my hands through my hair before getting up. I notice my rooms in disarray as I pull up a pair of sweats. I help Arianna jump off the bed and she's clinging to my leg as we walk down the hallway and to the stairs. She lets go of me as she sits, sliding down the stairs and laughs up a storm as Anarchy chases her down.

"You ready for the whole day with your favorite person besides me?" Nikki smiles handing over her sneakers. I say good morning to him as I walk to the kitchen but he ignores me.

"The whole day? Does that mean I can bring my toys over?!" I hear Nikki chuckle, "No sweetie. I think you still have plenty of toys over there."

I pour myself a cup of coffee and let Anarchy out at the back door before going to the living room and sitting down, "Daddys right baby. You still have a lot over there."

She pouts a bit, "But they aren't new toys like the ones I have here.."

"Just ask Uncle Tommy for new toys." I shrug and smile at her as her eyes light up.

"Van." Nikki scoffs and rolls his eyes, "Arianna, you're fine with the toys you have there and the toys you have here. You aren't getting anything new."

Arianna huffs before she stands in front of the tv watching cartoons, "You hungry V? I can cook you something. She already ate."

I nod, looking at him "I'm starving. Can you make French toast? What are we doing today since she's going over to Clems?"

I stare when he narrows his eyes at me, "I'm staying home and so are you." He says sternly as my eyebrows pull together, "Don't need you in public till the news and frenzy dies down about your behavior."

I tilt my head to the side, "My behavior?" I say confused as I hear a car horn.

"Wait till she's out of the house, yeah?" Nikki rolls his eyes at me and I frown at his attitude. He helps Arianna with her jacket and hands over her backpack, "See you later bug." He bends down and kisses her forehead before he leaves to the kitchen.

"Is daddy mad?" Arianna questions curiously as we walk to the front door.

"What? No, no, daddy's not mad. You know he's just grumpy in the mornings." I bend down to fix her laces, "I'll see you later okay? Be good and we can go to blockbuster tonight." She leans forward and gives me a kiss on the cheek and a tight hug. I open the car door for her and help her get up and wait till she buckled. I feel Clementine looking at me and I glance, "Good morning."

"Morning.." she grumbles but cheers up when she says the same thing to Arianna.

"Thanks for taking her. I don't remember us talking about it though?"

"Yeah, you didn't. Nikki asked me."

Why was everyone being so damn short with me?

"Okay...well have fun. Bye Ari." I wave to her as Clem rolls the window up and starts heading down the driveway.

I walk back in the house, leaning against the front door as I smell cinnamon and vanilla coming from the kitchen. I feel jittery as I walk through the house, Nikki has the portable radio on to the rock station in the kitchen. He's moving his head a bit and has his back towards me, I pull myself on the barstool and keep to myself.

"That was Bulls on Parade by Rage Against The Machine and you're listening to KLAZT LA's best rock station. Up next, we're taken it back with a littl Home Sweet Home by Mötley Crüe. Speaking of the Crüe, did anyone else see the article in entertainment today about the antics of Vanity Blackwood last night at their album release party. Chick seems like a real keeper...Not!"

I gasp before Nikki tosses the magazine down on the counter, "You fucking embarssed me last night Vanity."

I stare at the magazine cover. I look fucking plastered as Nikki is trying to keep me standing and the headline reads: The princess takes a tumble as Mötley Crüe heads in the direction of their old antics.

My eyes widen at the shots of me on my knees outside of a limo with both Tommy and Nikki trying to pull me up. I pull up my sweats seeing cuts and bruises on my kneecaps and shins.

"God, Nikki..I-I'm so sorry. I don't even know what to say. I-I don't remember any of this."

Mötley Crüe was suppose to be celebrating their album release with new lead singer John Corabi, however they ended up babysitting. Vanity Blackwood (Nikki Sixx's ex and baby mama) had one too many fruity drinks and ended up having to be escorted out (see above). Our office reached out to the bands rep but they had no comment.

Nikki slammed his hand down on the counter, covering the picture of me in the limo with a bright yellow star reading 'censored' between my spread legs, "You're really going to look me in the eye, lie, and tell me you don't remember any of this shit? You humiliated yourself, me, and the band. So who gave you the fucking blow?"

Everything came rushing back, the blow in the bathroom with Corabi, the hallucinations, the vomit outside in the rose bushes when we got home, "I-I went to the bathroom then I needed some air and clem came with me and I started hyperventilating and that's all I remember."

"Vanity." Nikki took a deep breath, "Just tell me what happened. I won't get mad, I just want to know. I was fucking worried sick about you last night, almost took you to the damn hospital."

I pushed the magazine away from me, "I went to the bathroom, then I went outside. I remember I was seeing crap that wasn't there. And I felt sick to my stomach. But I didn't snort anything I swear. I haven't touched anything since New York."

"Vanity! You weren't acting drugged! Or like someone spiked your drink! You were a incoherent mess, you were pale as a ghost and your pupils were as big as the eye of a needle."

The yelling made my head throb as I rubbed my temples to relieve it, "I don't know, Nikki. The last thing I remember is sitting at the bar."

He rolled his eyes, "So I don't know when you're high on coke? You were a babbling mess. Kept saying shit over and over. You're jaw was clenched so god damn tight I thought I was going to have to take you to a dentist! Fuck! Van! You were saying I was with Donna and wouldn't shut the fuck up about it! She wasn't around! Wasn't even fucking invited!" He stepped away from me to go flip the French toast angrily and toss the spatula down after.

"I don't know Nikki..." I spoke in a soft whisper, "I didn't snort, smoke, or shoot anything. Why can't you believe me?" I was already this far down the rabbit hole, why should I stop now?

"Because Van, I know you. Did John give you something because he was acting fucking weird too."

I shook my head looking at him, his eyes were drilling holes in an attempt to get it out of me, "No....I barely talked to him. I congratulated him and that was it."

"Fine." He glares for a moment before looking away, "We'll have to wait a few days before coming out with a statement to clear things up."

"Can't we just wait for it to blow over like everyone else does?"

He scoffed, "Seriously?! You dragged my bands name through the fucking mud!" Nikki shouts before stomping over to the tv and turning it to MTV, "They've been talking about your god damn interview all morning."

"Any thoughts on the album Vanity?"

I rubbed my face as I saw myself almost fall over nothing before grabbing onto the interviewer for stability, "Well, in my honest opinion, the album could be better." I slurred every word, "It's-its not Mötley and it sucks without Vince. Corabi sucks, and the album sucks. It sounds like every band now a days. It's too...too heavy. And! And you know what else!" I pointed my finger at the camera and grabbed ahold of the microphone, "Vince wasn't even fired like Nikki said. I was there that day. Nikki was just bitching like he always does and-"

I felt sick to my stomach when Nikki turned off the tv and threw the remote down, "That's why we need a god damn statement. We'll go with your lie about the spiked drink and call it a day. Got it?"

"It's not a lie.."

"Just don't. Just fucking don't, okay? I know when you are lying and when you're telling the truth. I'm done fucking talking about it."

I stared down at my nails, seeing dried blood around my knuckles. Just say it. Just tell the truth. Just say Corabi gave you the drugs and risk the chance of Nikki kicking him out of the band. I heard Nikki groan when the house phone started ringing.

"What?!" He answers it before rolling his eyes, "It's for you." Nikki glares and hands it to me.

I get up and go with down on the couch, "Hello?"

"Bad time to call huh? It's Jon..." I smiled a bit and peaked over the back of the couch to see Nikki in the kitchen cooking, "I just uh...I saw MTV and-"

"Please, please don't watch it. I was really drunk last night and was acting like a total idiot. That's not how I am and I didn't mean anything I said." I explain, running my hand through my hair, grimacing when I feel it sticking together.

"I figured...they're making you seem like a bad person and I just wanted to make sure you're okay sweetheart." I hear his smile from the other side.

"I'm okay....just dealing with the repercussions. But thank you for checking in. It's really sweet of you."

"You're welcome. But hey..since I have you on the phone. I was hoping maybe we could get together soon? I had a lot of fun last time and I've been thinking about you quite some bit."

I blushed a bit, "Really? Um...yeah, I'd love to see you again. I'm free next weekend."

"That sounds good. Can I pick you up around four?"

My eyes widened, "You wanna pick me up? I can just drive to wherever."

Jon chuckles a bit, "Sixx gonna shoot me or something? Look, I'll take my chances just for you. You'll love what I have planned."

"Okay...yeah you can pick me up. My address is 7904 Palo Verde Court and the code to the gate is 666.."

I smile when Jon laughs, "How clever of him. I'll see you next Saturday Van. Don't listen to the media, it will eat you alive."

I thank him again and say my goodbyes as I put the phone back on the receiver. I go over to the plate Nikki put down as he's already eating, "Will seeing my tits make you feel better?"

"Shut up. Seeing you naked and bent over isn't going to make anything better. I'm pissed Van."

I sigh, "I know. And I'm sorry, okay? I really am. I didn't mean anything I said about the album. I like the album, it's not my favorite but I like it. You know I support everything you create."

"It didn't feel like it." I hear and see the frown and I gently reach over and touch his hand.

"I mean it Nikki. That wasn't me last night and I'm sorry I had you worried." Nikki gave my hand a squeeze before letting go.

"Let's just move past it okay? It already happened and there is no reason for us to argue about it. You said your piece and I said mine. We have time without the kid so let's just relax today." He leaned over and kissed the side of my head, "Love you..”

“I love you too.”

To whom it may concern,

My behavior and antics a few nights ago at the album release party were completely and utterly unacceptable. In no way, shape or form is that how I truly am. I was heavily under the influence and after a trip to the hospital, my blood work had an ungodly amount of Rohypnol in it. So in other words, my drink was ‘roofied’. We are working with the LAPD and the club owners to narrow down the assailant. To the boys, the band, Mötley Crüe, I have never once had any ill feelings towards anything that has been created. I have loved and cherished each album that has been put out by the band. I am extremely apologetic for anyone's feelings in and out of the band I have affected in a negative manor

Best Regards,

Vanity Blackwood

[gerberbabey]

cocaine | kiara carrera

madison bailey rlly met her gf ON TIKTOK, thats wild and now i see that my chances arent as low as i believe. anyways love that for them.

writing this made me so damn depressed. like if anyone would like to fall in love w me, im just here...chillin.

masterlist | cocain series: 2 | 3 

summary: Kiara falls in love with someone who isn’t willing to love anymore (story inspired by the mentioned song and this scene).

warnings: that gay shit, cursing, angst, underage drug use, underage drinking, mentions of dying, unrequited love?

♫ Cocaine by Pink Sweat$ ♫

Kooks could talk as much shit as they wanted but it didn’t exactly stop them from showing up at the boneyard for a kegger. They whined and complained about Pogues but still came around to the other side of the island because they knew they would have a good time.

“It’s like watching National Geographic,” Kie winced and you sputtered out a laugh, stumbling back as you tried to keep the water from dripping onto your clothes. There was a pocket of Kooks jumping around to the music, moving in a weird sort of unison that was both stiff and awkward.

“Ew,” Kie laughed as you leaned forward to spit out the water that you had been trying to drink. To be honest it wasn’t that funny of a comment but you were also high of your ass so everything was hilarious.

“I can’t breathe,” you huffed out and Kie had to hold you steady when you stumbled into her. You were laughing so hard that it was at that point where you weren’t even making any noise. She couldn’t stop herself from laughing because of how hard you were laughing.

“Oh my god (Y/N) it wasn’t even that funny!”

“Then why are you laughing?!”

“Because you’re laughing!”

The two of you burst out into another fit of giggles as you wrapped your arms around the girl, resting your head on her chest as she wrapped her arms around you and struggled to keep the two of you standing.

“Are you two ok?” Pope walked up to the two of you just as you stumbled into the sand in a laughing heap. You let out one giggled and took in a deep breath as you stared up at Pope, your head hazy and heavy.

“Chillin dude,” you drawled out and Pope shook his head before he helped the two of you up. Kia brushed off the sand from her curls and you gave an aggressive shake of your head as you brushed out the sand from hair at the same time. Kie let out a noise and Pope stepped back to avoid any sand flying at him.

When you stopped you stumbled to straighten up. Everything around you was moving fast and yet slow at the same time and you let out a laugh.

Kie couldn’t help but look at you with a dopey look on her face. She wished she could tell you just how much she loved you. The day Kie had realized she was in love with her best friend was a bit of a stressful one. Kie was a firm believer of the “No Pogue on Pogue macking rule”. Not only did she believe it would change everything if broken, she also didn’t want to have a reason to be tied down to the Outer Banks. She loved her friends, her family, and her life on the island but she knew she was capable of so much more. Deep down in her heart she knew that she was meant to travel the world. That the best way for her to succeed was to get out of the Outer Banks and into the world.

But then one day she looked into your eyes and knew she loved you. That she was in love with you.

You were friends with the Pogues before she’d joined the group but you were the first one she met. You met the rest of the Pogues through JJ, and then had integrated Kie into the group after you started working at The Wreck.

After the betrayal of Sarah Cameron and the pain she went through being ostracized by her entire school, meeting you and then the boys had been her saving grace. Sure you weren’t jumping to your feet to try and help baby sea turtles into the ocean, but you always listened to her. You understood her.

“I mean everyone’s freaking out about plastic straws but the cups are like...more plastic,” you added to her rant and she nodded enthusiastically.

“That’s exactly what I’m saying!”

She was pretty much convinced the two of you were soulmates the day you had played her a playlist that you made just for her.

Yet even though she was so head over heels in love there was too many reasons why she couldn’t tell you.

One of the biggest reasons was your lack of faith in love and relationships. Convincing you that falling in love and being in love was a good thing proved to be a difficult feat. You’d been hurt so much by the concept of love that you’d moved past the point of thinking you’d ever fall in love. You left it behind and believed wholeheartedly that it wasn’t something meant for you. You didn’t believe in marriage and didn’t believe that you would ever find that person. You’d stopped looking and that meant that you couldn’t and wouldn’t see Kie in the way she wished you would.

“Yo (Y/N)!”

You and your friends turned at that and Kie watched you grin as you ran up to the boy who called you. You jumped into his arms and Kie bit her lip.

“Dude! What the fuck is up?!” You yelled as the boy laughed and let you down. You were jumping around excitedly, “Yo when did you get home?”

“Yesterday.”

“Who’s that?” Kie asked JJ and the boy turned to look at what she was talking about.

“Huh? Oh that’s Quincy, he graduated last year I think? Went to the Navy or something, him and (Y/N) were really close.”

“Oh.”

Kie wondered why she never heard about Quincy.

“Kie!!!” You waved her over and Kie pushed down that weird feeling that was rising up and hid it with a smile. She moved to stand by you and tried not preen when you took her hand in yours, intertwining your fingers and holding on tight. She hoped that Quincy would conclude that she was yours. (You may not have been hers, but she was wholeheartedly yours).

“Kie this Quincy. He was my fuckin plug before he left,” you laughed and Quincy crossed his arms and gave you a look. Kie felt a little relieved but then thought about this.

“Didn’t you start smoking when you were like...in middle school?” Kie asked and Quincy laughed while you shrugged.

“Yeah, can you imagine how I felt seeing this 12 year old asking me if I sold?”

Kie tried not to cringe. You’d been smoking for way longer than she’d known you. Your tolerance surpassed JJ, likely because of your lack of tolerance breaks. Kie could argue that at least you’d only smoked weed and hadn’t dove into other, harder drugs. The one time you had, Kie nearly had a heart attack and the boys almost killed a boy for urging you to take it.

You’d told her once that you just really liked how being high made you feel. The strain you smoked made you feel relaxed. It eased your mind and your body.

You told her that you started smoking after your parents separated. They’d fallen out of love and decided that rather than being adults and dealing with their issues themselves, they’d put the weight and stress of their problems onto your shoulders. A year later you had decided you were going to quit because you’d fallen in love with your boyfriend of a year and a half. You nearly did stop getting high, but then your boyfriend broke up with you, didn’t tell you you why, and then ghosted you.

3 days later he’d posted about his new girlfriend (he’d reassured you nothing was going on between them when you were together. The time stamp of the filtered picture told you and everyone else otherwise).

Kie wanted to spite the people who’d led to the walls you built around your heart.

You had guided Kie and Quincy back over to the other Pogues and Kie couldn’t help but cling to you that night. She didn’t like Quincy’s familiarity with you. It was kind of childish really but it’d been a while since you’d looked eager to interact with anybody who weren’t the Pogues. Kie’s heart skipped a beat when she realized how absolutely ok you were with her holding and touching you.

“Hey...(Y/N)?”

“Hmm..?”

The two of you were laying in her bed. The kegger had ended some time ago and though the two of you would’ve usually stayed at the Chateau with the boys, she’d decided she wanted to spend the rest of her night alone with you. She’d appreciated Quincy taking the two of you to her house.

“You really don’t think you’re going to get married?” she questioned quietly and she watched you open your eyes and look into her own.

“Hm...Yeah. Probably not,” you told her honestly.

“Why not?”

“...I don’t know. I don’t think I’d want to commit to someone that much. Plus...I don’t think anyone would wanna commit to being with me either.”

Kie would.

“But what if someone loves you...so so much, but you just won’t open yourself up to them? Would you really risk losing that before you even know it?”

You stayed silent at that. This was something that constantly went through your mind. sometimes you thought about those “what if” moments constantly. What if you’d given that boy a chance? Would you be in love with him now? Would the two of you be happy?

Yet you also thought: but maybe the two of you would be miserable instead. Maybe it would just lead to more pain.

“I don’t know if I could deal with being hurt because of love again.”

“...Ok...”

The two of you eventually drifted off to sleep. Kie’s chest hurt but she dreamt about kissing you.

Kie sometimes wished that she could be the one to bring your heart out of its hiding place. She wanted to be the person that you were willing to finally love. She wanted you to toss aside the risk of getting hurt because she’d make it clear to you that she would never hurt you.

JJ had gotten too high once, and had told her that you and him sometimes went to the dock and just sat there in silence. That the two of you would allow your worries to ease just by being beside one another and that you both knew that even without talking, or venting, or even smoking, you understood how JJ felt and JJ understood how you felt.

Kie wanted that.

She wished she didn’t have to push so hard for you to feel comfort in her, but she would continue pushing nonetheless. Despite how close the two of you were as friends, vulnerable moments were rare with you. 

“Kie, I need you to leave this alone ok? It’s seriously not any of your business,” you’d tried to shake her off and she only became angrier. The boys had shuffled out of the room the moment you’d walked in with Kie yelling at you.

She had went to pick you up and caught you snorting a line of...something, in your room.

“None of my business!? I can’t just let you hurt yourself like this (Y/N)!”

“Kie you smoke with me! Fucking weed is killing me just as much as any other drug would! If you cared so much then don’t cherry pick what you decide to care about!”

“Don’t ever tell me how I feel!”

“God you’re not my fucking mom Kie, just stop!”

“No (Y/N)!”

You’d stormed off after that argument. Out of all the people in your life you thought Kie would be the last person the chastise you for anything you did. You thought she understood. Kie felt terrible when you didn’t come around to the Chateau or even talk to her and the Pogues for the rest of the day. Kie’s heart was in your hands and you were squeezing.

The next day, Kie had bursted into your room crying.

“You can’t be mad at me for just wanting you to be ok...” she sobbed and you held her tight to you. 

“I know Kie, I know. I’m sorry,” you mumbled into her hair before you gave her a kiss on the forehead. She pulled back to look at you and she took in the worried expression on your face. She was hyper aware of the feeling of your thumbs stroking her cheek. Kie shut her eyes and leaned forward to press her lips onto yours.

Her heart broke into a million pieces when you gasped and backed away.

“Oh my god...” Kie sobbed and stood from where the two of you had clung to each other on your bed, “I’m sorry-I just..I’m gonna go-” 

You couldn’t say a word as you watched Kie rush out of your room.

“Fuck!” she yelled before the door slammed shut.

part 2...?

[the-fiction-witch]

Darth Duck

REAL LIFE SCANDAL COUPLE: TBS X REAER RATING: FUNNY + SUGGESTIVE

"Welcome... everyone to another Episode of Thomas and Y/n have taken to much of something and are now going to do something that's probably a bad idea" Y/n smiled as she sat in a mesh dress with a bright red and black bra and Thomas sat at the table beside her drinking vodka shirtless

"Welcome to drunk food reviewing"

"Not what we are doing?"

"Aren't we?"

"No Thomas"

"Ohhh... what are we doing?"

"Read the board Thomas"

"I can't... its over there. Read it to me y/n" he sighed laying on her shoulder

"We are doing the video we have to age restrict? remember Thomas?"

"Ooooooooohhhh the sexy video?"

"Yes, the sexy video, that's why you don't have a shirt on"

"... Did I remove my shirt? or did you do that?"

"You did that"

"They why don't I remember."

"Because of the state you are in sugar cube" she laughs kissing his head and patting his hair

"Can we get nuggets when we are done filming?" he whispered

"we have Nuggets? there on there way with the food bicycle man"

"Hurry Up food Man! I want tiny chicken  shapes!" he complained

"I should probably get to the point?"

"Why? Sally will edit for us"

"We can't rely on sally"

"why not? I love sally, she had a great..... face"

"Does she? Incase you can't notice. We are half drunk and also... kinda stoned. Maybe a little tiny bit"

"You're stoned! I'm just drunk!"

"We have had... between us. Three bottles of wine. a bottle of whiskey and half a bottle of vodka. and then like a teaspoon of weed"

"I think it was like a cup of weed"

"it was a small pot, i smoke it because Thomas brought it back for me from his holiday in Holland, He did not smoke any, However he was in the room when I did. so I think you have like a baby contact high" she says "don't do drugs kids... but we are adults. ish. Kinda. Legally we are adults."

"I know you are but what am I?"

"This is the issue is that Thomas is a weird childish person anyway, and then you get him drunk and he becomes like six but a six year old who just read what all the swear words are, and when he's high... yeah this is what happens he just becomes like a weird whatever this is"

"Fight me bittch! I am the king!"

"Yes Thomas, yes you are" she laughs cuddling him "You wanna know what we are doing today? Or do you wanna sober up a little bit?"

"Tiny sober? while you explain the thing we are doing" he says leaving a moment

"We are reviewing weird sex toys I found online, Now if I sound way more together thats because I didn't drink as much becuase... I didn't want a repeat of the Barbie cake incident. and also because I think I have way more of a tolerance then Thomas does" she says as Thomas returned with a coffee "Better now?"

"Yes"

"Its the weed, that if fucking you up right now. it just makes me really calm and slow... you just fucking go off the bloody walls"

"Yes it is. so. show me the first sexy thing"

"I am the first sexy thing"

"Yes you are, you are very sexy, May I nuzzle with the boobs?"

"No"

"But I wanna"

"But you can't we are filming right now Thomas"

"But! Boob!"

"No boobs for you"

"Fine... I'll grope my own boobs" He sighed groping his own chest

"I think you are still too out of it to function"

"Im functioning, I have great tits"

"You do, you want the first toy or not?"

"Yes! bing it to me"

"Here you go" Y/n said putting  a rubber duck on the table she clicked a button and this yellow duck began to vibrate across the table

"Who is this for? Becuase... I cannot stick my dick in it. and as far as I was aware that is the point of most male sex toys"

"Sticking your dick in it?"

"Sticking my dick in it" he says "To be fair I put my dick alot of places I probably shouldn't" he says looking at the toy

"You do. Like your ex girlfriend" she giggled

"Ooohhh that was a low blow"

"I assume for girls becuase... vibration"

"Guys like vibration too"

"Yeah but.. I think its for ladies Or just in general as a vibrator" she says "Rate this out of One to five climaxes?"

"Two, Its meh"

"I'd say three, just is nothing else because it amuses me"

"Like your exboyfreind"

"Bitch..." she sighed "Would you rather have thids duck then your rubber duck upstairs?"

"No, Becuase my ruber duck is amazing"

"Is he?"

"Yes! How dare you insult My duck" He says getting up a moment and when he returned he had a little bath duck dressed like Vader "He is darth Duck." "Darth Duck?"

"Yes. He murdered a group of eggs because of his brain washing and now has a deathboat that goes around destroying ponds"

"So you would rather have a tiny sith duck in your bathtub then this vibrating guy?"

"Yes I would"

"Okay... he comes home with me then"

"what's next?"

"This is an Egg Massager"

"I am Aware of these"

"Ohh are you?"

"I use to have on of these" "DId you? like seriously?"

"Yeah, its way smaller and easier to hide then like a full fleshlight, even like the fleshlights where its just the jelly plastic are hard to hide, hard to store, hard to clean, hard to travel with. so yes I got one of these and it is amazing! its not to big, not to small so it breaks, you can turn it inside out to clean it" He explained

"Thats on the internet now thomas"

"I know. I have crossed a line just being in this fucking video"

"so lets just say fuck it and jump over it?"

"The line has been crossed so Lets just run with it"

"Is this what a virgina feels like to men?" she asks sticking her fingers in it

"A little bit. as much as any male sex toy does. I have yet to stick my dick in a sex toy and actuly feels like a virgina. but thats not really the point. Its like I imagine vibrators and such like aren't really meant to feel like getting fucked. but you know if they feel like a dick then great"

"I get that yeah... this is like fourty pounds though?"

"Its worth it I think. As a man"

"How many orgasms out of five?"

"Four and a half orgasms"

"Better then your ex girlfreind?"

".... yes"

" this product is thomas aproved"

"Few sex toys recive that"

"Yeah becuse your boring and don't want sexy toys"

"I like sex toys. but I would rather just... have sex"

"okay so like not mastabation toys like partner toys?"

"Yeah" "Like handcuffs, lube, maybe like one of those vibes for men and ladies?"

"Yeah, more like that. I hope my ex doesn't find this video"

"Ohh she's gonna be mad at you"

"Also... My future children. If you are watching this and I birthed you please do not watch this"

"You birthed them? when did you grow a womb?"

"Yesterday"

"Moving on! you want some lube thomas?"

"Hit me with the lube"

"Here you go, its... strawberry flavoured" she says "You like strawberries thomas"

"I do, But I don't get the point"

"The point of lube?"

"No the point of it being flavoured" He says "I don't get that"

"Its for like... if I was for jerking you off and i needed lube I could use this and then after jerking you off for a while I could suck your dick and it would be strawberry flavoured"

"Or I guess... for eating out also? for the same reason"

"yeah for that. I hope there arent just people like eating lube. If so... Get help Because thats a problem" she says putting some on her arm and licking it "Its not bad, tastes like... strawberry chew its"

"Gimme" he says putting some on his hand "Okay frist it looses points for being bad lube"

"what?"

"This is shit lube y/n"

"How... how can you tell that?"

"rub it between your fingers, Now good lube you should be able to separate your hands and it should get stringy like it reaches between your hands"

"Like slime?"

"Yes like slime" he says "or put some on your hand good lube you should put your hand upside down and it shouldn't move it should stay on your hands"

"You have alot of lube kwnollage"

"I do." he says before having a lick of the lube "Where are you getting strawberry chew its? it tastes like strawberry cough syrup" He sighed "Do we have to do anymore? Can I go to bed?"

[youmeanlove]

all of them for yusuke !!!!!!!!!

SCREAMS thank you SO much im bout to end this mans (my wish to keep answers short) whole career 

update: sorry this took so long i decided to become a novelistKJF LITERALLY its so long thank you soooo much for sending this ask i had a field day

fresh mown grass: what is your f/o’s favorite scent? does it remind them of anything specific?

paint is the obvious answer so ofc that but he rly likes the smell of a smoked out kitchen. probably because thats what happens every time he tries to experiment w food but it still makes him happy to hav fun with it

pastel sunrise: what was your f/o’s first impression of you? yours of them?

hehehe…he thought i dressed really weirdJFJF he was like one part intrigued one part ‘wtf ew’ but either way boy did he stare at me! for like, minutes straight because he has no self awareness. once we started talking he thought i was um..like, inspiring i guess. that sounds conceited but he just thought i was a cool ‘care-free’ model of life! i thought umm..he was very tall and kind of intimidating! i felt bad because the other students shunned him for being involved with his mentor nd thought he could do with like, literally any social interaction. i thought he was really kind, despite being very straightforward w everything! OH and i thought it was admirable how focused on his passions he was

blooming flowers: what is your f/o’s favorite part of nature? do they even have one?

the ocean!!!! we went to the beach once and he went ape over how the moon looked reflecting over the water

four leaf clover: does your f/o have any good luck charms or superstitions? do you? do the two of you share any?

yusukes really superstitious actually! unlucky words/numbers and stuff like that. one time he broke a comb on accident and threw it across the room lmao. we both go absolutely ham and wont sleep w/ our heads to the north bc we dont feel like dying young

ocean breeze: have you and your f/o ever traveled together? what is your dream vacation?

hoyah! we dont travel because we’re both poor ass art students but we do go to the park a lot! theres some really pretty ones near the schools so we’ll go stare at geese and flowers n stuff! we talk a lot about traveling to spain bc sexy

lemonade stand: what is your f/o’s favorite beverage? and yours?

yusuke my mans rly likes lemonade but like when its kinda bitter? he doesnt like really sweet foods but lemonade and tea are 👌👌. i really like cola uwu

fireflies: how do you light up your f/o’s life?

hehHEHE U///U show that boy how to have fun!! let himself go and chill out sometimes!! he’s always so hard on himself and i help him remember that he doesn’t need to be so focused and stressed all the time anymore!! lov that guy

music festival: what is your favorite type of music? your f/o’s? any overlap between your favorite genres?

yusuke likes chill out music like classical and stuff because hes a NERD and it helps him focus on work! i’m a speedcore rat. we both like swing music because we’re gay

pumpkin latte: what is your guilty pleasure as a couple? 

sometimes we drink juice out of the carton and put it back in the fridge because like who has time for cups..nasty nasty. also idk if this counts but we’ll take those stupid buzzfeed quizzes for like an hour and judge our results OH we stan ‘accidetally’ falling asleep in our day clothes bc we were too tired to change

costume shop: do you wear couples’ halloween costumes? what’s your favorite thing the two of you have ever gone as?

HELL YEAH WE DOOOOO yusuke was like dude remember that time i turned into a mouse can i dress up like a mouse and you dress up as a giant block of cheese and i was like (slaps the desk) absolutely babe

cozy sweater: how does your f/o make you feel secure and safe?

ahejegfahjkgehaheehaejh tall. hes vv straightforward to every1 so i know he’ll always have my back if someone does something to upset me! and he’s always like Bro You Are So Beautiful Dont Ever Say You Arent Bro I Love You Bro except he doesnt say bro ofc hes Fancy

bonfire: what’s one thing your f/o has done to warm your heart?

ONE TIM OH one time he told me that i was one of the few ppl that never rly seemed like i judged him for not being very good at social stuff and that it made him want to talk to even more ppl and like get his childhood back and im :”) also one time he let me hide a stray cat in his dormKJF

ski slope: do you and your f/o play any sports or do any athletic activities together?

lol no we both have an iron deficiency we dont do anything about. we do like to play hand clappy games a lot tho he can beat my ass in slide

snowball fight: how do you and your f/o playfully tease each other?

HONESTLYFKJF we dont tease each other that much bc like. yusuke literally doesnt understand teasing most of the time and i cant bring myself to risk hurting his feelings! i jokingly made fun of his emo bang once and he was like What Is My Hair Bad Should I Get It Cut Do You Not Like It and i was like OH NOOOO!! he doesnt rly know how to tease either but its okay we just compliment each other a lot! no room for teasing in this house

gift wrap: what’s the best present your f/o has ever given you? what’s their favorite present they’ve gotten from you?

OH MY GOSH eheh one time he gave me a winter coat and that sounds lame but it was the best thing to ever happen to me bc i had been talking for like 3 weeks abt how gosh darn cold it was and this poor fool bought me a whole coat!!! raaaaaa!! yusukes fave present i bought him would probably be okay this also sounds silly but a dvd player! he kept buying dvds that were interesting and then realizing that he couldnt watch them anywherejkhf

rosy cheeks: tell us about a time your f/o has made you blush!

hehHEHEEJH okay so at lunch we used to trade so that id give him like food and hed draw me something bc his foster dad be like (whips and dabs) financial abuse but anyway his sketches used to be like scenic stuff or still life or random stuff he happened to see outside while we ate but then one time he gave me a sketch of me!! and was like cause u looked rly nice today i had to draw it and BOYYY WHEN I SAY A BITCH WAS RED!!!!!!!

OKAYFKJF I WROTE WAY TOO MUCH THANK U SO MUCH LEGEND im in love with an anime boy

[lesbianbruabba]

Answer all the qs! Unless theres any you don’t want to do

Mobile so these are ugly sowwy

1:Let’s start with a tricky one; what is the real reason you are confused right now?

Well I just spent my night watching exurb1a that p much explains it

2:Do you ever get “good morning” texts from anyone?

Sometimes?

3:If your significant other smoked pot, would you care?

I’m pro legalization but if it’s an addiction obviously I’d try and prevent further damage. If it’s well controlled i don’t mind.

4:Do you find it easy to trust others?

I trust too easily so yeah

5:What were you doing at 11PM last night?

Watching exurb1a, or wanking, or looking at takeouts on Deliveroo

6:You’re drunk and lost walking down the road; who is with you?

Probably my brother or one of my best friends

7:What would you do if you found out you had been cheated on?

Cry

8:Are you close with your dad?

Fairly close imo. But we have a lot of opposing views and I have to try and overlook those.

9:I bet you kissed someone last night, right?

No?

10:What are you listening to?

Magic by Coldplay @samrull can suck my dick

11:You can only drink ONE liquid for the rest of your life - what is it?

Cum fanta lemon

12:Do you like hickeys?

YES unless they’re on my boobs then NO bc I used to have like massive ones and I couldn’t sleep on my back

13:What time do you go to bed?

Hahahhahahahaaha you must be new here

14:Is there someone who continuously lets you down?

My mother

15:Can you text as quickly with one hand as you do both?

Yea

16:Do you always answer your texts?

Most of the time unless I’m tired

17:Do you hate the person you fell the hardest for?

No

18:When was the last time you talked to one of your best friends?

Like a few minutes ago with Iza bc I pester her a lot

19:Is there someone that makes you happy every time you see them?

My little brother and all my best friends

20:What was your last thought before you went to bed last night?

I went to bed yesterday morning but my last thought was ‘I love Tom Holland’

21:Is anyone else in the room with you?

No. I don’t think so

22:Do you believe what goes around comes around?

No

23:Were you happier four months ago than you are now?

Yes. On the 30th December I was probably hanging out with my brother.

24:Is there someone you wish you could fix things with?

A few. Some are beyond repair, others are just lost chances.

25:In the past week, have you cried?

Lmao. Yeah. A lot.

26:What colour is the shirt you are wearing?

White with pink and blue argyle patterns

27:Do people ever call you by your last name?

No. I would hate that

28:Is anyone ignoring you right now?

Probably? Idk

29:Do you have a best friend?

I have 7 bitch

30:Would it be hard seeing someone else kiss the last person you kissed?

No

31:Who was your last call/text message from?

Iza

32:Are you mad at anyone?

Yeah. Pro lifers.

33:Have you ever kissed someone older than you?

Yes

34:How old will the last person you kissed be on his/her next birthday?

23? Idk I don’t remember

35:How many more days until your birthday?

Like 3 months minus a bit.

36:Do you have any summer plans yet?

Yeah! I’m going to Poland with my mum. Then I’m going home and going to suffer in the HK heat.

37:Do you have any good friends of the opposite sex?

Yes. Two, one is my brother.

38:Are you keeping anything from your best friend(s) now?

No. I’m an open book lol

39:Do you have a secret that you’ve never told anyone?

I don’t think so??

40:Have you ever regretted kissing someone?

No

41:Do you think age matters in relationships?

Depends on the age gap and the ages of the parties involved

42:Are you available?

Yes

43:How many people have you had real, strong feelings for since high school ended?

1 or 2

44:If you had to get a piercing (not ears), what would you get?

Nose ring but not septum. On the side of my nose

45:Do you believe exes can be friends?

Yes if they put effort into it

46:Do you regret anything?

A lot.

47:Honestly, what’s on your mind right now?

Turbulent is such a good song also I want thanos to raw me

48:Did you ever lose a best friend?

I’ve ghosted a best friend if that counts bc she’s toxic as fuck

49:Was your last kiss a mistake?

No

50:Why aren’t you pursuing the person you like?

Bc they don’t like me back lmao and also ‘pursuing’ sounds kind of predatory??

51:Has the last person you kissed ever seen you cry?

No

52:Do you still talk with the person you LAST kissed?

Not really

53:What was the last thing you ate?

A weird cake that was sweet but I couldn’t pinpoint the flavor

54:Did you get any compliments today?

Yes

55:Where are you going on your next vacation?

June to Poland

56:Do you own anything from other countries?

Yeah I have dolls from Belgium and Poland and Japan and also some trinkets from other places

57:Are most of your friend guys or girls?

The majority are girls

58:Where have you lived most of your life?

Tseung kwan o

59:When was the last time you took a long drive?

I don’t drive :D

60:Have you ever played Spin the Bottle?

No

61:Have you ever TPd someone’s house?

No! I’m a good girl uwu

62:Who do you text the most?

Probably Iza

63:What was the last movie you saw?

Endgame but it’s a bad stream of it

64:What’s preventing your current boyfriend/girlfriend from going back to their ex?

Don’t have one

65:How many boyfriends/girlfriends did you have in 2011?

66:Is the last person you kissed younger than you?

No. You asked this question earlier

67:Do you curse around your parents?

Hell nah they’d ground me even though I’m nineteen

68:Are you happy with where you live?

Not really but it’s okay

69:Picture of yourself?

70:Are you a monogamous person or do you believe in open-ended relationships?

Personally I’m monogamous

71:Have you ever been dumped?

No

72:What do you most like about making out?

It’s hot

73:Have you ever casually made out with someone who you weren’t seriously involved with?

Yes

74:When you kiss someone for the first time, is it usually you who initiates it or the other?

Both?

75:What part of a person’s body do you find most attractive?

Face

76:Who was the last person you talked to last night before you went to bed?

Iza or my brother’s gf

77:Had sex with someone you knew less than an hour?

No

78:Had sex with someone you didn’t know their name?

No

79:What makes your heart flutter and brings a big cheesy smile to your face?

Dogs

80:Would you get involved with someone if they had a child already?

NOPE

81:Has someone who had a crush on you ever confessed to you?

No lol have you seen what I look like

82:Do you tell a lot of people when you have a crush?

Depends on who the crush is and who I tell. Usually I tell my brother and maaaaaybe some of my more sensible friends

83:Do you miss your last sweetie?

???????????

84:Last time you slow danced with someone?

Uhh never. I wish I did though that sounds cool

85:Have you ever ‘dated’ someone you’ve never met?

Nope

86:How can I win your heart?

Make me a playlist and be honest with me. Also be funny

87:What is your astrological sign?

Leo but I’m more of a cancer

88:What were you doing last night at 12 AM?

Eating my takeout and watching exurb1a

89:Do you cook?

I make a good risotto and also potato dauphinois. But otherwise no

90:Have you ever gotten back in touch with an old flame after a time of more than 3 months of no communication?

Don’t got one

91:If you’re single right now, do you wish you were in a relationship?

Hells yeah @wlw hit me up

92:Do you prefer to date various people or do you pretty much fall into monogamous relationships quickly?

The latter

93:What physical traits do you look for in a potential interest?

A nice face. I like older blondes when it comes to women and less muscley men. Generally for everyone, the more feminine the better.

94:Name four things that you wish you had!

Bigger eyes, a boney figure, fluency in all languages, more brain cells

95:Are you a player?

I play the ukulele

96:Have you ever kissed 2 people in one day?

No

97:Are you a tease?

I plead the fifth

98:Ever meet anyone you met on Tumblr?

Yeah a few and they were all v sweet gals

99:Have you ever been deeply in love with someone?

I don’t know

100:Anybody on Tumblr that you’d go on a date with?

Yeah

101:Hugs or Kisses?

Hugs!!!!

102:Are you too shy to ask someone out?

I don’t think so

103:The first thing you notice about the opposite sex?

Eyes

104:Is it cute when a boy/girl calls you babe?

Yes!! And I call everyone that except my brother he’s dickhead

105:If a sexy person was pursuing you, but you knew he/she was in relationship, would you go for it?

No!!

106:Do you flirt a lot?

Depends on who you are and how well you know me

107:Your last kiss?

Last year

108:Have you kissed more than 5 people since the start of 2012?

No

109:Have you kissed anyone in the past month?

Lmao no

110:If you could kiss anyone who would it be?

One of the people I’m crushing on probably. Or Zach Grace

111:Do you know who you’ll kiss next?

No, that’s an interesting question though.

112:Does someone like you currently?

Probably not. Again, refer to picture of me

113:Do you currently have feelings for anyone?

Yeah I always fuckin do

114:Do you like to be in serious relationships or just flings?

Serious relationships

115:Ever made out with just a friend?

Yes

116:Are you happier single or in a relationship?

Well I’ve only experienced the former so

Thanks for the questions sorry they’re ugly im also ugly but I’m sure u arent

[letsdothistom]

Air Guitar and 85 MPH!

I was going to spend my second “blog” discussing pretentiousness in Santa Fe or New Mexican food and green chile in general.  But since I came up with something a little more fun, I guess I’ll save the talk about ordering water in a bowl and drinking it with a spoon for a different time.  On my drive back to Oklahoma I thought of a topic that always shows its face when I’m on a road trip.   I often forget about it until the next time I’m in the car or just don’t put much thought into it once I’ve opened the car doors and let the dog out to deal with his pent up energy as I unload the car.  Not to mention the obligatory hour I have to spend re-aquainting myself to the cat, who is certain that I have disappeared forever this time.

The topic that came to me is road trip songs.  

I love road trips.  You may think I’m crazy but settling into the driver seat, snacks on the passenger seat,  the basset hound panting in my face, his front feet on the console, anticipating our newest adventure, is the best.  Within a pretty short time, he tends to realize that this is just another day-long roady and roughs up his blanket in the backseat and settles in for the ride. Giving me weird basset hound glances in the mirror.  Not sure if it’s the music or he just wants some pork rinds.

Now these road trips of mine usually arent extravagant or exotic.  Unless you consider driving state highways through Kansas, Oklahoma, Wyoming or any other of the fly-over states I tend to travel as being exotic. (Personally I’d choose these drives over just about any other you could propose to me).  The great thing about these road trips, aside from seeing so many wonderful historically relevant places (as well as plenty of non-relevant places), and feeling a oneness with wide open spaces, is the time you get to yourself to hone your listening skills.  

Those of you that know me, know that I have many preferences when it comes to music.  As Cheech says in Up In Smoke, “we play everything from El Chicano to Santana”.  I love it all.  Some more than others, but I probably have a song or two from every type of playlist or genre that you can think of.  Add to that the fact that if there is a specific location I’m aiming my car to (often there is not), I will jam songs from or about that location.  For instance, while driving the empty roads of New Mexico it will be Ennio Morricone and The Good, The Bad and the Ugly soundtrack.  Wyoming is of course Chris LeDoux country.  On my way to Kansas City to eat BBQ, it’s Joe Williams singing “Kansas City” or Charlie Parker and K.C. Blues.  Memphis is Sister Rosetta Tharpe (you can keep Elvis, I am not a fan.  Yeah, I said it).  West Texas?  Marty Robbins Gunfighter Ballads, of course!  Down south, it’s Big Maybelle, Lightnin’ Hopkins and Muddy Waters.  You get the idea.  It may seem strange but there is something that touches my soul in listening to those songs that are native to an area.  Whether or not I actually do learn anything, it feels as though I have.

With that weird little eccentricity out of the way, let me add that of course there are some staples of any road trip, for me at least.  These are songs, albums and artists that I listen to, to fill in all the  empty spaces of those relatively uneventful miles, musically or otherwise.  Maybe it’s Def Leppard or ACDC or Beyonce or Ariana Grande for you.  For me these are easy.  I can not even begin to guess how many miles have been eaten up by Merle Haggard, or The Count Basie Orchestra.  I am not scared of extreme opposites.  Hundreds upon thousands upon tens of thousands of miles have been chewed up by these two musical groups, and yes, I’m aware that I am probably the only person living who can claim that.

The millennials reading this will have no idea about this next category.  There use to be these things called albums.  Albums were a group of songs, recorded (usually around the same time), and released as a unit to the masses.  These units were sold as vinyl records, cassette tapes, 8-tracks, or CDs.  Those of us a little older can attest that 90 percent of these albums had 2-4 songs that we liked and a bunch of other average or barely tolerable songs that you listened to whether you liked them or not (if you didn’t have control of the radio in the car).  Sometimes, you even grew to enjoy a few of those songs.  On rare occasions though, you found an entire album, yes the whole thing! that you enjoyed.   For all of us oldies, these albums are near and dear to our hearts.  They vary from person to person, but these are a few I can put on and just let them play, enjoying almost every song:  Van Halen-1984, Blood Sweat and Tears-Greatest hits, Nirvana-Nevermind, George Strait-Strait From The Heart, Muddy “Mississippi” Waters-Live, Art Blakey-Moanin’,  U2-Joshua Tree, Miles Davis-Kind of Blue, Steve Miller Band-Greatest Hits 74-78, IceT-Greatest Hits to name a few of my favorites.

All of these categories are important to a good road trip.  You must have a combination of all of them.  Yeah, I know, all of you XM/Sirius users are claiming that you don’t need any of them.  You got genres on every channel, and all you ever need with all those fancy channels.  To those of you in that camp, I say “HOGWASH!”  Why Hogwash?  Well no matter how specific these channels are, or how much you enjoy the carefree toggling between your favorite genres, no road trip is complete without those irreplaceable, epic, nostalgic songs that nearly blow out your speakers and get your ears ringing whenever you choose to rock them.  And how the hell are you supposed to play these favorites 2, 3, 10 times in a row with your XM radio?!  You can’t. So without further palaver, I’m gonna lay my favorites out and would love to hear some of yours.  

Rich’s top 20 Road Trip Jams (if you have any sense, you will build this playlist!-yeah I know it’s not gonna float everyone’s boat but if nothing else, listen to it, you might find some music that you don’t normally dig.)  And for the record, none of these songs ever get bumped off the list, new ones just get added to it occasionally.  As weird as it may be, here is my list:

Honorable Mentions.  These songs get me thinking about all the great road trip songs and my musical wheels start turning.  It’s on when I hear any of these songs.

Runnin on Empty-Jackson Browne, Hello Walls-Faron Young, Blues in Hoss Flat-Count Basie, Night In Tunisia-Ella Fitzgerald, Gimme All Your Love-Alabama Shakes, Miles and Miles of Texas-Asleep at the Wheel, China Grove-Doobie Brothers, Come Down-Anderson Paak, Crosstown Traffic-Jimi Hendrix, El Paso-Marty Robbins, Ida Red-Bob Wills and Sunshine of Your Love-Cream.  Those get me started but here is when it gets real.

20-16  These are like the kindling for me.  Getting the fire lit, and starting my descent into the next hour of driving, without really remembering the road I’ve just driven or the scenes outside the window.  

20)  Suavecito-Malo   Ok, Ok, it wouldn’t seem like a fire starter, but...

19)  Magic Man-Heart This one should get your blood flowing

18)  Keep on Rockin’ Me-Steve Miller The best roady to choose from SMB

17)  Watermelon Man-Herbie Hancock You might not have soul if you don’t love this

16)  When My Train Pulls In- Gary Clark JR Great Long Jam.  incredible guitar riffs

11-15  These are a small step up, adding logs to my fire

15)  Me and Mrs. Jones-Billy Paul So there’s always a song that you love to sing while you are alone in your car, and you think you sing it just as well as the artist

14)  Stairway to Heaven-Led Zeppelin Ok so of course I have it, but this is a really, really great song no matter how many times it is played.

13)  Ev’ryday I have the Blues-Count Basie and Joe Williams The definition of a foot stomper.

12)  Luckenbach, TX-Waylon and Willie One of the best country songs translates to a great road song.

11)  The Story- Brandi Carlisle Not a song liable to be on many lists, road trip or not.  My sister introduced me to this years and years ago and it barely misses the top 10

6-10  Ok, we are really cookin with gas now.  These are legendary roadies in my book.  The dog gives me a look, here we go again.

10)  Rooster-Alice In Chains Gets my grunge on.  I love everything about this song.  Probably one of the biggest contributors to hearing loss in my right ear.

9)   Six Days on the Road-Dave Duncan All those over-the-road truckers can’t be wrong, this is the best of all truckin’ songs.

8)   Tonight The Bottle Let Me Down-Merle Haggard   My favorite country singer and a whole lot of my favorite country music instrument, the steel guitar.  Damn I love this song

7)   Ticket To Ride-Beatles There are tons of Beatles songs to choose from and this isn’t my favorite, but it is my favorite on the road

6)   867-5309-Tommy Tutone This is my favorite 80s song.  And when I hear that guitar riff at the beginning...Jenny, Jenny who can I turn to?

2-5  These are huge, the fire is roaring and I have no concerns as to what is going on at this point.  I’ll be singing, playing drums, air guitar.  The dog has now tried to cover his ears due to the volume.

5)   Jamie’s Cryin-Van Halen Im not sure why, because there are tons of Van Halen songs to choose from, but for whatever reason, this one is my favorite while on the road

4)   North To Alaska-Johnny Horton   Ok, another one you may not expect at all but damn this is a fun song.  I physically can’t help whaling “big nuggets they’re finding” every time!

3)   Pink Houses-John Cougar Mellencamp    Im not a globalist. ‘Murica!!

2)   Sweet Child of Mine-Guns and Roses    This should be on everyones list. Road songs or any other.  Simply one of the best songs ever.  

Number 1!!!

So all the previous songs are great.  I love them all, and many, many more.  This is an elaborate list for me.  If you know me, you know I love lists, and don’t make them without deep thought.  But Ironically, the battle for the top spot isn’t even close.  I LOVE Sweet Child of Mine, and Pink Houses.  I might play them 2 or 3 times in a row, but the battle for number one isn’t much of a battle.  Not because these others arent great but because number one is so unbelievably spectacular in the car.  I can’t help singing to it, playing air guitar, drum solo in my car, volume literally turned up 3 or 4 times during the song, ears ringing and can’t even hear myself singing, and just when you don’t think it could be any better, it gets better!!!  There are times I may play this song 5, 6 times in a row if things are cookin.  I can barely keep the needle under 85 mph! The number one song for the road is:

1)  More Than A Feeling- Boston  I really built it up, and with good reason. Rock ballad, guitar anthem, unbelievable vocals, harmony soft, loud, louder, high, higher, drums...what else can I say?  This is simply the best road trip song ever!!

Ok, that’s it.  Maybe it was anti-climatic for you, but I got jazzed just listing the songs.  I may go take a drive just to hear the playlist!  I’d love to hear everyone else’s playlist that they take on every trip.  Maybe I’m missing some good road trip songs!  

I hope the dog never figures out how to jump out of the car while it’s moving.

[catmeme-moved]

all of the asks! >:3

god ok 

1. You woke up naked next to the last person you texted, what would you say?

😏

2. What’s going on between you and the last person you kissed?

3. If your boyfriend or girlfriend was into drugs, would you care?

i dont think i could date anyone who does any kind of drugs,, it makes me Very uncomfortable

4. Is your last name longer than six letters?

its only 4 babey

5. Was your last kiss drunk or sober?

sober...ive never been drunk

6. Have you ever wanted to have someone but you messed it up?

i guess?? it was in high school so i dnt think it rly counts since yknow, i was 16

7. What does your last received text say?

“jgdijgjfdivjdjdj me“

8. How many times have you kissed the last person you kissed?

not enough times !!! i love kissing my gf

9. Where was your last kiss at?

in the parkinglot behind my dorm building

10. When is the last time you saw your sister?

i saw both my sisters when i was home for break a few weeks ago

11. What do you drink in the morning?

coffey

12. Where did you sleep last night?

my bed 

13. Do you think relationships are hard?

not rly? i think if relationships r hard then they arent rly meant to be

14. If you could go back and change something in the past 5 months, would you?

god i wouldnt have spent so much money

15. You’re locked in a room with the last person you kissed, any problems?

none at all ;3c

16. Would you rather it be sunny or rainy?

i guess rainy....overcast weather is my fav

17. Do you know anyone with the same middle name as you?

my mom ! probably lots of other people too shjkdh lee is a fairly common name i think

18. Are you wearing jeans,sweatpants,or pajama pants?

jeans

19. Do you think you will be in a relationship 3 years from now?

i hope so!!!

20. Does anyone like you?

god i sure hope my gf does

21. Have you ever kissed someone with a name that starts with an S?

nop

22. Is the last person you kissed gay?

ya thats why i kissed them ghksdjs

23. Is there a person you CANNOT stand?

no one that i know personally.. there r some like celebrities and other famous ppl i dont like

24. Have you ever considered getting a tattoo?

yes i want a tattoo from a specific artist in my hometown!!!

25. In the past week have you cried?

i mean probably i dont remember though

26. What breed was the last dog you saw?

a pug...i saw him in a donut shop

27. Do you dry off in the shower or out of the shower?

i dry off as im stepping out of the shower

28. Have you ever kissed a football player?

no bc jocks intimidate me

29. Do you think you’re old?

not really in the grand scheme of things.. im only 20 i still have decades ahead of me !

30. Do you like text messaging?

ya

31. What type of day are you having?

its been ok! i spent time w my roommates downtown

32. Have you ever thought about getting your nose pierced?

i hav my septum pierced but a nostril piercing would b nice

33. Do you prefer warm or cold weather?

cold..

34. Is there a person of the opposite sex who means a lot to you?

i dont rly think theres such a thing as “opposite sex” since sex is also on a spectrum like gender

35. Would you prefer a relationship or a fling?

relationship ! flings r nice i guess but i prefer the stability and commitment of an actual relationship

36. Are you a simple or complicated person?

i thnik im fairly simple..idk

37. What song are you listening to?

when he died by lemon demon

38. When you say you’re sorry do you mean it?

yea of course39. Is there a girl that knows everything or almost everything about you?

my best friemd emily40. What made you start liking the person you like now?

theyre hot and funny and very kind!!!!41. When did you last receive a text message?

idk maybe an hour ago42. What is wrong with you right now?

im hungry and not being held by my gf43. How well do you know the last female you texted?

its my mom so fairly well i think44. Does anyone disgust you?

men45. Would you date someone right now if they asked?

no bc im already dating someone46. Are you in a good mood right now?

i feel...neutral47. Who was the last person you talked to in person?

my roommate !48. What color shirt are you wearing?

its blue pruple n green tie dye49. Has someone recently told you something you didn’t want to hear?

ya my history professor told me i had to read books50. Anyone you’re giving up on?

no one is coming to mind51. Do you hate the person you fell hardest for?

i dont hate anyone!

52. Have you ever thought about giving up on someone but couldn’t?

almost gave up on ever being able to pet the raccoons outside the dining hall but someday ill be able to earn their trust

53. Do you like rain?

yes!!! 54. Do you care if your boyfriend/girlfriend drinks?

not rly ! as long as theyre safe about it ykwim55. Have you ever liked somebody and never told them?

no i think ive told most of my crushes how i felt about them at the time 56. Do you like to cuddle?

god yes i love to hold and be held57. Are you shy?

its the social anxiety 58. Do you get along with girls?

i am a lesbian59. Have you dated the person you texted last?

we r dating !! 60. What do you carry with you at all times?

my phone and my peper spray 61. If you were paid 1 million dollars to spend the night in a supposed haunted house, would you?

id do it for 10 62. Do you think you can last in a relationship for five months?

ive been in my current one for 7 and my longest lasted 8 ! 63. Think back to October, were you in a relationship?

yes! 64. The person you like kisses you on the forehead, do you find this cute?

anything my gf does is cute65. Did anything “cute” happen in the last week?

my cat yawned when she tried to meow and made a weird squeak sound

66. How old are the last three people you kissed?

18 (or maybe 19 now idk), 19, 20

67. Would you rather pay to get your nails done or do them yourself?    

i do them myself bc i hate spending money68. Which do you like better- Zebra print or leopard print?    

ghgdh,....neither69. Do you have any stickers on your car?    

i dont have a car yet 70. Would you rather listen to Luke Bryan or Lil Wayne?    

neither...i dont rly like eithr of those music genres71. Blackberry, Anroid, or iPhone?    

im samsung bitch until i die72. When’s the last time you had pizza from Pizza Hut?    

its been months. maybe years. i dont like pizza73. Do you like diet soda?    

i dont rly like any soda anymore tbh74. What color are the walls in your room?

plain white...f    75. Are you 16 or older?    

bitche im 2076. Do you watch Pretty Little Liars?    

nop i dont even know waht its about77. Do you have a job?    

yes i work in a library !  78. What are your initials?    

ylb79. Did you ever have braces?    

no :^/80. Are you from the south?    

nope im a pnw bitch

81. What does your last status on facebook say?    

something about voting82. Do you still talk to the first person you ever kissed?    

ya shes my best friemd83. Are you closer to your mom or your dad?    

my mom.. fuck my dad !84. Have you ever done cheerleading or gymnastics?   

i vaguely remember attending a gymnastics class when i was like 5 85. What’s the last movie you saw in theaters?    

uhh.. venom i think86. Do you smoke?    

no never !!!87. Would you rather wear heels or flip flops?   

flip flops. 88. Is your phone touch screen?    

god how old are these questions. who has a phone that isnt touch screen now89. Do you normally wear your hair straight or curly?    

my hair is naturally curly !90. Have you ever snuck out of your house?    

no91. Would you rather swim in a river, lake, or pool?    

a pool..... rivers and lakes r scary92. Have you ever made out in a car?    

not yet93. …Had sex in a car?    

no that seems. . difficult. theres not very much room94. Are you single or in a relationship?    

im in a luvly relationship95. What were you doing last night at midnight?    

sleepin96. When’s the last time you saw fireworks?    

new years i think??97. Do you like the camera on your phone?    

yea its pretty nice98. Have you ever had a friend with benefits?    

no but ik i wanted one before i got into my current relationship skdgjhj99. Have you ever passed out from drinking?    

no but i did drink half a beer thing once and went to sleep bc i got a stomach ache100. Are you friends with people on facebook that you actually hate?    

i dont even use facebook101. Have you ever had a pregnancy scare?    

when i was in first grade id play “family” w my friend sometimes and she’d pretend to be the dad and i was the mom so we would spoon each other bc we thot thats what sex was and i thought she actually got me pregnant bc i was 7 and didnt know anything102. Name your favorite Kesha song:    

the song blind slaps103. Do you have any tan lines right now?    

no its winter and i also dont go outdoors104. Would you ever wear cowboy boots with shorts?    

 i hate wearing shorts

[lovemesomesurveys]

Have you ever disliked someone just because a friend disliked them? I try not to get in the middle of that stuff.

Which would you rather own: A camera or a video camera. Why? My phone functions as both and that works just fine for me, so I don’t need to choose.

Have you ever won a lot of money in a slot machine? How much? I’ve only played a couple slot machines before and won nothing. I didn’t get to play much because I got sick. The casino I was at allowed smoking and I’m really sensitive to it. Needless to say, I didn’t enjoy my first, and probably only, experience at a casino.

Do you watch sport on TV even though you aren’t a sporty person yourself? Nope.

Do you eat / drink at your computer? Yeah.

How much do you overeat at special occasions? (Birthdays, Christmas, etc) I used to grub on all the appetizers, main course, and desserts on the holidays, but my eating and appetite has changed a lot these past few years.

The music you listen to: Is it mostly sung by female or male vocalists? Hmm I don’t know who I have more of in terms of male or female.

Do you think it’s important to enjoy your job or do you just work for money? Ideally you’d enjoy the job you have, but unfortunately that isn’t always the case.

Do you require glasses / contacts to see properly? If so, which do you use? Yes, glasses.

Tell me an embarrassing thing that happened to you recently: Nah.

When you hear your voice back on a recording, do you think it sounds awful? Ew, yes. I hate it.

When was the last time you got the hiccups? A few days ago, actually.

If you had to, which record would you go into Guinness World Records for? Nothing.

The last sweet thing you ate: What was it? A brownie.

If you had to change your name, what would you change it to? Nah. I’ve had my name for 29 years, I think I’ll keep it. ha.

Do you have a middle name? Do you find it embarrassing? I do. No, I don’t think it’s embarrassing.

What would you choose to be famous for? I don’t want to be famous.

What is your current occupation? Do you enjoy it? Unemployed.

Do / Did you enjoy school? Why (not)? I did overall. It definitely didn’t feel like it a lot during it, but yeah overall I can say I did.

If you have a webcam, are you ever paranoid people can see you? No.

Do you find it difficult to sleep at night? Any reason(s) why? Yes. Good ol’ insomnia.

If you had to go on a game show, which would you choose? I’d be so bad. I know I’d freeze up and look really dumb.

What about if you had to go on a reality show? Which would you choose then? Noooo way.

Tell me about your favourite TV show: I have a lot.

Have you ever wished you were born the opposite gender? Why? Nah.

If you had dental braces, which colour would you make them? I never had braces for my teeth.

Does any part of your body hurt right now? Where and why? Speaking of teeth... I have a toothache. D:

Have you ever found the jokes in Christmas crackers genuinely funny? I’ve only done one of those things once, but I don’t remember there being a joke. Guess it wasn’t memorable.

Why were you last irritated? I was just moody.

What time did you get up this morning? I haven’t gone to bed, yet. It’s 1:09AM.

The last city you were in: Where was it and do you like it there? Well apart from mine, I went out of town to a nearby city to go to a different Target.

Do you like the countryside? Yeah.

If you see someone yawn, do you often yawn as well? Not usually.

Recommend me a good movie: Apparently Bird Box on Netflix is super good. I haven’t seen it, yet, but I’ve heard it’s like really good.

Do you think you’d make a good model? Would you ever want to be one? Nope.

How often do you change your hairstyle? What does it look like now? I’ve been dying it red since May of 2015. I don’t see that changing for a long time.

Truth or Dare? Truth.

Do you have a favourite day of the week? Which is it? Nope. They’re all the same for me, mostly.

[idreamofwolves]

Summary: Klaus has lost his greatest love to another man and confides in his old friend Stefan.

Pairing: The Originals - Klaus x OC

It was the beginning of autumn, the once warm summer air had turned into that familiar, crisp breeze. The earth seemed like it was graying, dark clouds hung from the sky like curtains, surely it was about to rain.

Leaves of red, brown, and orange crunched beneath Klaus’ feet as he walked aimlessly down the sidewalk. He took in the wonderful sights and smells like he had done every fall since his birth, except this time, it left a sinking feeling in his stomach. It was her favorite time of year. He felt, deep down, that he should have been sharing this gloomy day with her, but instead she was probably cozying up with someone else.

As The hybrid walked into an old, musty, bar, that honestly looked the same as it had almost one hundred years prior, he pushed the thoughts of jealousy and anguish from his mind and took a seat at a booth by the window.

“Hi, I’m Rachel, what can I get for ya?” A waitress asked as she smiled sweetly. She was pretty and upbeat, something Klaus has grown fond of in someone else and noticed upon seeing the young woman.

“Cab, please. That’s it.” He answered, barely over a whisper.

“House okay?” She asked, receiving nothing more than a nod from him. As she left, he noticed the quiet chatter around him but was too lost in his own head to pay any mind to the locals and their petty, human, and otherwise useless gossip.

He stared out the window, drowning himself in his own thoughts as he watched the storm roll in. He was so focused that he hadn’t even noticed when Rachel set the glass of wine down in front of him and left. Who knew how long it had been there before he saw it?

Soon, after 2 glasses of wine and a cigarette, something jolted Klaus back to reality. “Hey boss.” It was Stefan, he slid into the booth across the table and greeted him. “What’s up?”

“I don’t want to be bothered, so if you don’t mind..” he said, trailing off.

“I heard you and Lily broke up. And-“ he was cut short by the darkest of glares given by the temperamental hybrid. Klaus has already gone through a somewhat murderous spree since it all happened. Since he’d gotten out of of his anger, he’d been more so dealing with the burden of loss, but Stefan was quick to give a much gentler tone, as to not bring back the cold blooded killer. “Tell me what happened. “

“Why do you care Stefan? Klaus asked after an exasperated sigh. “You have had a lost the woman you love more times than I’m sure you’d like to admit, and you sure as hell didn’t come to me for advice.”

“I’m just trying help.” He gave Klaus a stern look, letting him know he was just genuinely trying to be kind to his once best friend.

The hybrid took another glance out the window as he started his short story. “I went to her house to see her, everything seemed fine.” As he spoke he could feel this heart practically hanging from his chest. He didn’t like confiding in people, but who else was going to do this for him? “There was a pack of cigarettes on the table...” The event of that day flashed through his mind, bringing him back to the first moment he could remember feeling heartbroken in ages.

〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️

”Lillian! Come, I have a gift for you.” Klaus called as he entered his girlfriend’s home. She was still in her pajamas and her hair looked disheveled, nevertheless Klaus found her mesmerizing. She was so beautiful and perfect in every way in his eyes.

As she came to the doorway where her loving boyfriend stood, bearing a bouquet of flowers and a box from Tiffany’s. Her eyes were already red and swollen, she smelled like salt and Klaus automatically knew something was wrong. “Thank you.” She almost choked out as she took the flowers from him and put them in a vase. As she filled the vase with water, Klaus noticed something out of the ordinary.

“Cigarettes?” He questioned, knowing well she didn’t smoke. “Who’s are they?” He asked calmly, his interest only slightly piqued by the odd object. He lazily pick up the pack and examined it, confused by it.

Lily’s heart sank and he could hear it pick up in speed. “Oh, those. I don’t-“ she started, unsure of how to finish that sentence.

“What’s wrong, love? What’s going on?” He asked, his paranoia kicked in, or so he thought, and he was on edge.

Tears were already streaming down her face when she managed to choke out “Klaus, I uh- I need to tell you something.” He waited silently while she stood before him. Her body was shaking and her breaths were uneven. He reached out to take her trembling hand, but she pulled it away, unable to look him in the eye. “I made a mistake.”

Her words hung in the air, Klaus didn’t quite catch on to what she meant yet. “What are you talking about?” He asked as he felt anxiety rise.

“Klaus, those cigarettes aren’t mine. They belong to man I met a while back. “ Before he could get a word in edgewise, she blurted out “We slept together last night.”

Klaus could feel the color draining in his face, he felt nauseous and immediately wanted to kill whoever smoked the Camels in his hand. “You did what?” He asked, and to Lily’s surprise, he didn’t sound angry, but worse, he sounded crushed.

“I’m so sorry.” She sobbed, wiping her tears with her sleeve. “I never meant for that, I just happened and I feel terrible.” She was already begging for his forgiveness, desperation haunted her voice and left the air in the house feeling cold and stale.

He took a step back, honestly terrified of a human for the first time in his entire supernatural life. “How could you do that?” He asked, so calmly that you’d have thought he was expecting this.

The hybrid’s anger was familiar, something Lily knew very well how to deal with, but this? This hurt he was showing? That was all new territory and she suddenly felt so distant and far from him that he wondered if her heart would give out on her from being so heavy. “I’m sorry, I love you. Please don’t-“

“What, kill him?” He asked, holding back a laugh that held no happiness, only absurdity. He took another step back and threw down the cigarettes and Tiffany’s box on the table. “No, no, I won’t touch your new lover.” His tone was venomous and the look on his face was a look that came from the devil himself. “You keep him, revel in your new love.” She knew this was a threat, but of what nature she was unsure.

“Please, we can work this out. I’m so sorry, let me-“ He backed up again as she took steps toward him as she begged. “Don’t go, we can fix this. Please, you know how much we love each other.”

“Our love was a mistake.” He blurted out, suddenly uncaring of anything in the world. His old, thousand year old heart was falling into pieces and there was nothing he could do. “And I don’t make the same mistake twice.” As harsh and angry his words were, his demeanor was still relatively calm.

He heard Lily fall to the floor and sob when he stormed out of her house. Such a large part of him wanted to go back in and tell her they’d work it out, he was desperate to coddle her and wipe away her tears, but he had to stand his ground and protect his own heart. Love had only proven to be heartache once more.

〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️

“They were his.” Klaus continued to Stefan as he thought about that damn pack of Camels. “She admitted she slept with him and I left. End of discussion.”

Stefan had noticed Klaus looking down at his phone, as if he were expecting a call. “She won’t call, you know.” He advised, and the look of Klaus’ face confirmed he believed the same thing. “Look, I know you love her, but it’s over.” Klaus’ knew it just as well as Stefan, but hearing it out loud was different. Hearing it out loud made it seem far more real.

“So what do I do now?” Klaus asked, pleading for an answer, something that would take the pain from his chest if only for a moment.

“Now, you and me go get some drinks. What do you say?” This made Klaus remember why he and Stefan were so close all those years ago. He was always so much more than a friend, he was a brother.

“Yeah. Let’s forget tonight.” He said, allowing Stefan to lead him from the booth to the bar.

Stefan looked at Klaus with a sympathy no one else would. And just before he dropped the subject, he put a hand on his friend’s shoulder and said “it’s going to hurt for a while man, but you’ll be fine.”

[adilynia-kiden]

Extreme Character Sheet: Pixie Edition

Character’s full name: Adilynia Eonaris Silverfall Reason or meaning of name: Her middle name is homage to the Titan Eonar; Protector of Life Character’s nickname:  The Pixie Reason for nickname:  Given by her sister due to Addie’s diminutive size, and the fact that when she was little, she used to train with her shield wearing fake wings.   Birth date: December 20

Physical appearance

Age:  153 ( 26ish human) How old does he/she appear: 24-26

Weight: 120ish

Height: 5’5

Body build: Thin framed, with well toned musculature.

Shape of face: Square

Eye color: Teal (Soon to be gold!)

Glasses or contacts: None

Skin tone: Pale

Distinguishing marks: Seven freckles form under her right eye that looks like a constellation. Hair color: Black Type of hair: Thick strands that form in half curls. Tends to be unruly. Hairstyle: When fighting, always up. Everywhere else it tends to be let down, but the top portion is almost always braided to keep most of the strands from her eyes.   Voice:  Quiet, barely above a whisper most of the time. Overall attractiveness: 6/10 (Compared with the rest of Thalassian elves) Physical disabilities: None Usual fashion of dress: has a fondness for lace and soft fabrics when not in armor. Favorite outfit: Armor, or a sundress of some sort. Jewelry or accessories: Gold chain with a glass feather charm that hangs from her waist. Ear cuff that looks like Eonar’s vines, in silver and set with tiny colored gemstones.

Personality

Good personality traits: Loyal, Polite, Willing to listen, her empathy

Bad personality traits: Closes herself off, doesn’t talk about her feelings, unhealthy coping mechanisms

Mood character is most often in: Anxious 

Sense of humor:  Good

Character’s greatest joy in life:. Her family, her colors and her duty.

Character’s greatest fear:. Icecrown

Why? Addie’s sister died there, and simply being there drags up way too many feelings.

What single event would most throw this character’s life into complete turmoil? Already happened. Vynalia’s death. Now? Failing in her promise to @ly-canthos

Character is most at ease when: Alone and falling

Most ill at ease when: Around people

Enraged when: someone she loves gets hurt

Depressed or sad when: someone leaves

Priorities: Her oath, family and currently, her orders.

Life philosophy: “My father had taught me to be nice first, because you can always be mean later, but once you've been mean to someone, they won't believe the nice anymore. So be nice, be nice, until it's time to stop being nice, then destroy them.”

If granted one wish, it would be: An end to the faction wars on Azeroth. Why? Addie will always feel like the combined forces of Azeroth are greater than divisive factions.  Character’s soft spot: Too many to count, but especially the love she has for her father.  Is this soft spot obvious to others? Currently? Ehhh, she’s not happy with him, but usually? Oh yeah.  Greatest strength: Loyalty Greatest vulnerability or weakness: Loyalty, it can make her very blind. Biggest regret:  That she blamed Raelin for Vinnie’s death. Minor regret: That last box of caramels… Biggest accomplishment: Earning her colors and becoming a Knight of the Silver Hand  Minor accomplishment: Not turning red for a full hour in Lycan’s company. Past failures he/she would be embarrassed to have people know about:  Sooooo many. The worst probably being the time she blew up a kitchen trying to make cookies. Why?  Because everything personal tends to embarrass her. Character’s darkest secret: How truly bad her PTSD is regarding Vinnie’s death, and also her mothers. Does anyone else know? Her father, Raelin… most of her knights have suspicions.

Goals

Drives and motivations: To be a worthy servant of the Light’s graces and serve with honor and dignity. Immediate goals: Keeping Teren safe. Not letting Lycan down. Not letting her father down. Not letting Raelin down. Each one of those things includes a dozen goals in and of themselves, so… its a lot at the moment. Long term goals: Continue serving the Silver Hand, and working to create a lasting unification between the Horde and Alliance. How the character plans to accomplish these goals: NO IDEA. She does know she has to leave her comfort zone, and that is a process she’s working on. Slowly. How other characters will be affected:  Maladir will relish the chance to see his daughter step from Vinnie’s shadow, and he’ll be proud no matter what. Much the same with Raelin, and though he’d never admit it, he’ll miss having her around. As for Kidenland? Well…we shall see.  

Past

Hometown: Silvermoon Type of childhood: Set in the upper echelons of Thalassian society, Addie had a very comfortable childhood that some would call idyllic. A good education, caring parents and a healthy family dynamic led to a wonderful upbringing overall. Pets: ‘Pets’ is a vague term for the fact that Addie keeps company with a whelpling named Neris, and a netherdrake called Vash.

First memory: Winter’s Veil, when Maladir made Addie her first tiny little shield to use.

Most important childhood memory: The day she won a spar against Vinnie, legitimately. Why? It took decades of getting knocked down by her older sister before Addie could honestly say she had won a duel against her. Vinnie would sometime let her win, but when she did it all on her own…it reminded her that even dragons can be beaten Childhood hero: Vynalia Silverfall Dream job: -named- Silver Hand hero Education: Classical education with a focus on Titan and Dragon studies. Countless tutors in weapons, tactics, war history and survival training. Religion: Devout follower of the Light Finances:  Well off

Present

Current location: Nishan Marche

Currently living with:  @teren-k @ly-canthos @daughterofkiden and whoever else makes an appearance! Pets: Neris and Vash (not pets...sentient dragons arent ‘pets’) Religion: Devout Follow of the Light Occupation:  Silver Hand Envoy/ Protection Detail Finances: Well off

Family

Mother: Candaris Silverfall (Featherstorm) Relationship with her:  Their shared love of Titans bonded Addie and her mother early on. Long conversations over cups of coffee was the norm. While Candaris insisted on a court life for Addie, she knew it would serve her well in a world full of liars and cheats. Instead of letting her youngest daughter keep her head in the clouds when it came to the gilded ballrooms of Silvermoon, she put her in the middle of it to prove that not all that glitters is gold.   Father:  Maladir Silverfall Relationship with him: Warm, caring and wonderful. Next to Vinnie, Addie’s father is the standard by which all things good are measured. Siblings: Vynalia Silverfall (deceased) Relationship with them: Attached at the hip, Addie’s adoration for her older sister could easily be classified as hero worship. No matter how brutal, callus and cold Vinnie could be on a field, she could never do any wrong when together with her sister. For Vinnie, the Pixie was everything good and pure in the world, and needed protecting at all costs. They were almost a decade apart, but the Silverfall sisters were twins in spirit. Spouse: None Relationship with him/her: N/A Children: None Relationship with them: N/A Other important family members: Raelin Dawnsorrow aka The Ironfist. Once engaged to the elder Silverfall sister, he had spent almost his whole life in their company due to living at the property adjacent to theirs. Early on, he came under Maladir’s command for his prowess on a battlefield and his ability to keep Vinnie’s battle rage tempered with mercy. Over the years, Raelin’s become the brother Addie never had. Their brief falling out over her sister’s death led to very dark times, but it was he who dragged Addie, kicking and screaming (literally) back into the Light.

Favorites

Color: Silver Hand blue

Least favorite color: Orange Music: Tastes range from the Tauren Chieftans to comedy songs. Currently remembering how much she enjoys the sound of a piano. Food:  Yes. All of it. Just give her all the food. Literature: Historical accounts of battles, Titan mythology, journals of soldiers. Form of entertainment:  Free-form mountain climbing, running, sparring, glass work. Expressions: Usually, carefully neutral save the copious amount of blushing. Mode of transportation: Clockwork panther, Vash the netherdrake or horses from the Silver Hand stables Most prized possession: Her shield

Habits

Hobbies:  Glass blowing/work making stained glass windows Plays a musical instrument?: She can tinker out small songs on a piano, and carry a tune, but nothing extraordinary Plays a sport? Jousting? How he/she would spend a rainy day:  Training. Just cause the weather is bad, doesn’t mean you can slack. Working. Or that is how she would have spent a day, given shes a resident of the Marche currently… she’d probably find a book, go curl up in the sunroom and fall asleep. Go sit in the rain.. just because. Spending habits: She’s not a lavish person, but certain things won’t be compromised on. Good food, good coffee, and good bed sheets. Smokes: Nope Drinks: Coffee Other drugs: Do dreamless sleep potions count?  What does he/she do too much of?:  Worry. What does he/she do too little of?:  Self care Extremely skilled at:  Holding the line, defensive tactics, sword play Extremely unskilled at: Do not ever give Addie a bow. Ever. Or make her cook  Nervous tics: nail and lip biting, looking at the ground etc. etc. etc. Usual body posture: When standing still, she always looks like she is perpetually stuck in prayer. Head bowed, hands clasped together with a straight back. Mannerisms: Polite and demure. Peculiarities: The color of her eyes is an oddity in that they are teal. She’s rather short for a Thalassian elf.

Traits

Optimist or pessimist? Optimist Introvert or extrovert? Introvert until she knows a person. Daredevil or cautious? Daredevil on and off a battlefield in terms of her climbing, cautious in everything else. Logical or emotional? Logical, but her emotions always get the better of her. Disorderly and messy or methodical and neat? Methodical and neat

Prefers working or relaxing? Working Confident or unsure of himself/herself?: Always unsure and always second guessing. Animal lover?: Yup! Except spiders.

Self-perception

How he/she feels about himself/herself: “I know my worth on a field, and that my last dying breath will be in defense of those that I love. Beyond that, all I can say is…I am trying.” One word the character would use to describe self: “Inhibited.” One paragraph description of how the character would describe self: “Well, the parameters for such a description are lacking. Are we talking in terms of height and weight? If that is the case, I’m vertically challenged for one born of elven heritage, and stronger than I appear. Odd in the dark color of my hair for a paladin. I try and be worthy of the continued graces the Light bestows upon me, but I often feel as if I am one step away from falling into shadows. I don’t know as I will ever be comfortable in my own skin, unless I am behind my shield. I struggle with my emotions on a near hourly basis, but in the end, everything is the Light’s judgment, seeking to find if I am still worthy.”

What does the character consider his/her best personality trait? “My compassion. Though it was a hard learned lesson, as I struggle with emotional connections, I have learned to be at peace with offering it to another. The same can not be said when it is offered in turn.” What does the character consider his/her worst personality trait? “My tenacity… stubbornness as some might call it. It’s the reason I hold a line…but it doesn’t translate well when it comes to personal interactions.” What does the character consider his/her best physical characteristic? “I would say my hands, as I know what they are capable of. However…the general consensus in the training yard is that I have a….well, that’s so say I spar a great deal and much of my training comes from fencing, which lends to lunges. I… think you may take from that what you will in regards to what my knights reference.” What does the character consider his/her worst physical characteristic? “My height.” How does the character think others perceive him/her: “I would like to think that I am considered kind and pleasant enough to warrant continued company. However, I also know that my self imposed solitude often makes people stay at an arms distance for fear of interrupting me…which makes little sense, as I would much prefer conversation to my own thoughts.” What would the character most like to change about himself/herself: “How closed off I tend to be. It’s become… paramount that this changes, but it not such an easy thing to change, especially where the ticking of a clock is always right in my ear.”

Relationships with others

Opinion of other people in general: “I enjoy watching people. Their stories play out like beautiful books… and most do not even realize it. They lead such beautiful lives, even in their pain…I see humanity for its best when the focus shifts from a field of battle and a fight for their very lives, to simply living for a moment. They offer insight when I am honored with any sort of company. They give me purpose behind my shield…if I can save just one from experiencing the pain of loss, the fight will have been worth it.” Does the character hide his/her true opinions and emotions from others? Always. Addie almost always has a careful mask of neutrality in place, though close attention will see it break… often. Person character most hates: Putress Best friend(s):  Raelin Dawnsorrow Love interest(s): @teren-k @ly-canthos (Yeah, I updated it:P) Person character goes to for advice: Maladir or Raelin Person character feels responsible for or takes care of:. Teren Kiden, Lycan Maddox, Maladir Silverfall, Raelin Dawnsorrow, Annest Kiden. Every single person that draws breath. Person character feels shy or awkward around:  Everyone? Person character openly admires: Turaylon, Uther, Tirion, Maladir, Vinnie, Raelin Person character secretly admires: Lady Liadrin Most important person in character’s life before story starts: Vynalia Silverfall

After story starts: Herself.

Tagged by: @jasper-quinn (OMG this took forever! <3) Updated Tag: @belillinafireseeker  THANK YOU!

Tagging: Whoever the heck wants to do this beast!

[fuckthisblog]

i tried to post a raw heart to heart calling myself out

and i somehow selected all the text and deleted it

and then accidentally clicked once when i went to click undo

so the undo just did the fuckin click

whatever

this is probably better, less words, more action

BULLET POINTS:

no more calling out of work unless ur dying, you can call in late if you have any hours left (i doubt u do..)

you need more nature in your life, you're dying without it, nobody cares how fat you are, just go for a fucking woods walk it will heal you---- if you need an excuse post on ur town list on fb//rover or some shit and find a dog that needs to be walked so that u cant back out. cant take ur dog cause she crazy but if its a last resort playing w her in backyard is great and you should do that more anyways

im serious im doubling down on the that point, you've been a nature baby since you laughed when you were baptized (what baby laughs when an old man appears to be attempting to drown them? you - cause ya liked the water) you need to swim, you need sun on your face, you need to feel the presence of living things around you without the pressure of those living things being able to communicate (ah the beauty of nature lol)

you need to establish basic daily tasks - you know what im talking about (*so basic its concerning you're missing them)

look into how expensive it might be to have someone come by once a week to take out trash

you need to see a doctor, something is wrong, it shouldnt be this painful to take out the fucking trash

apartment , cleaner, generally, you've always sucked at this so whatever just attempt it

stop drinking. you arent really. but stop anyways.

weed - problem? not a problem? idk but lets look into it. you stopped smoking and accomplished more than you ever have. you started again and you've been stagnant since. maybe a pattern, maybe a coincidence? either way it all leads back to seeing a fucking doctor because rn its hard to stop given the nausea and the pain

maybe throw your xbox into a river, just a thought

you dont need to know what you want to do in life, you just need to know what you want/need to do next

you're currently very alone and thats rough but a good thing, you've always been too codependent/too caring of what others thought/too needy ------ this is your time to go inwards. 27 years old. inwards inwards inwards.

IF YOU WANNA BE A GOOD PERSON THEN DO SOME GOOD FUCKING THINGS, VOLUNTEER FOR FUCKS SAKE

dont go on social media dont do it sadness lives there for you right now especially

CBT THERAPY IS HELPING A LOT KEEP IT GOING - YOURE DOING IT ON YOUR OWN AND THATS AMAZING IM VERY PROUD OF YOU BUT ALSO SEE IF MAYBE THERES ANY SUPPORT SYSTEM TO ADD IT COULD BE HELPFUL

STAND UP COMEDY- SAVED YA BEFORE

PHYSICAL ACTIVITY

JUST ANY

MOVE

ALSO TALK TO YOUR FRIENDS MORE YOU HAVE GREAT FRIENDS AND THEYRE SO SUPPORTIVE YOU'RE JUST AN ISOLATING ASS BITCH WHO WANTS WHAT SHE CANT HAVE

long story short ----------------

NATURE. MOVEMENT. CBT. GO INWARDS. ONE STEP AT A TIME.

AND POSSIBLY THROW XBOX IN A RIVER. (seriously youve never been a video game person, and now you are because youve cut off everything else - its a dopamine drain)

Done yelling now. Tasks for the rest of October through November. Go. Do. Succeed. Or try at least.

You have comedy tomorrow and Saturday to kick it off. And you just scheduled a mini road trip to another favorite comedian in new york for Nov 20th. You have a class (soon to be classes probably) starting in Nov which will help w the whole sense of purpose thing.

You can do this . You got this. Idk what "this" even means. I just know theres potential for more. A lot more. and you're really depressed right now, and meds can only do so much. You need to take..some form of action.

Even if it starts w just ... taking a fucking shower.

[jokeson-u]

i feel like talking about myself bc i do better coping and thinking when i have to articulate my thoughts and i dont feel comfortable enough about this stuff with my therapist or friends so ill do it here where no one will care lmao

drug, sex, depression tw under the cut

i gotta lot of things to say. idk where to start. i guess freshman year of college cus it was shitty. i was in a community college living at home and transporting to school by train. i went to each class maybe like 3 or 4 times and then just stopped showing up and instead. for some reason. decided to spend my days riding the trains or sneaking home to smoke (weed, i dont smoke tobacco and ill get to that later. actually i can just say that now i dont like cigarettes bc my parents chose buying cigs and alcohol over feeding me and my sisters when we were kids. also why i dont drink.) so i dropped probably at least a solid $500 that semester on food and ubers (train was free with the student card) and weed (actually no i just took all my bud from my dad so). i was severely depressed and just dug myself further into that hole by not going to class because no way could i tell my parents. then i like ??? idk had this dude over my house and stuff happened and i felt rly shitty afterwards and didnt rly know how to tell anyone. then later later my ex bf texted me cus he was sad and i had visited him the month prior and we had sex and it was not good. like i felt safe with him, ive known him since i was 13 nd we’ve been friends since then too, but he was a shitty bf both times we dated (sophomore year and senior year) and like .. i dont regret sleeping with him, bc he is someone i trust despite or weird relationship to each other (like we text maybe once a month for a few mins to check in sometimes), but i also. idk. that was my first time and i think virginity is a social construct but at the same time i wish i had an enjoyable first time. like maybe i was ok with it then bc i was trying to overcompensate for my experience with that guy from earlier in the year and not feel so used bc i know my ex at least cared about me and he felt bad afterwards bc it obviously was weird but. idk. it was just a really horrible time like... i felt like i had no friends bc they all treated my shitty and where gone to school anyways. i had no one to talk to, or felt i didnt, and everytime i tried id get in trouble. like i felt so trapped and depressed and didnt know how to get out of it. i was in the negatives in my bank account and didnt know how to pay it all off. i was hanging out with/spending money on/smoking with people i didnt even like just so i wouldnt be alone. it was rly rly shitty and one of my lowest points. but at the end of the semester i told my mom the idea of going back to school made me miserable so i dropped out and started working for my cousin for a little bit. then i got really really sick and got diagnosed with crohns disease which sucked as it but then i spent my bday throwing up with a 103 fever and had to spend the following week in the hospital which also totally fucked me up bc i didnt eat for almost that whole week bc the staff wasnt giving me food i could eat despite me telling them over and over. plus it was during covid so i couldnt see anyone or have any physical contact and it was just horrible. but i couldnt smoke during my time in the hospital obviously so i had a tolerance break and it was kinda nice to smoke again after that but? i dont rly smoke much anymore, my friends are all gone, i have no space or time to anymore. my friend always says u cant be addicted to weed but that first semester i know it was a dependency issue and i was glad that im past that but sometimes i get worried i guess that im too dependent on stuff like. my carts (which techincally arent weed bc theyre delta 8 so its legal) and im spending way too much money on those now too and UGH i hate feeling like i cant control myself bc my parents addictions fucked me and my sisters up but this is different cus i dont have kids or ppl relying on me but it still scares me bc i dont even ever feel high anymore when i smoke (weed OR cart) but i do it anyways in hopes that ill feel SOMETHING again and its just a constant cycle. anyways then this year i started working part time and then full time which has been good. but now next month ill be out of the full time job and im stressed about that. ok thats all for now folks bye