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rosyandraw · 8 days

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idk if this is redundant on your end but thoughts on Damen needing to talk during sex? in the books it isn’t even dirty talk it’s just endless want for Laurent and how long he’s been waiting for him and how different Laurent feels. Also in canon & in ur own writing

Definitely not redundant! You have just knocked on the Damen Character Study door in my head lmao but it's late and idk how much sense this will make so i'm sorry in advance.

Mini meta on Why Damen Likes to Talk During Sex in Canon

First and foremost words are hugely important to Damen, not just during sex but in general. It is part of the reason that Vere trips him up so badly, why he just doesn’t get it. Because Vere is a veil of word play and innuendo, it’s double speak and flowery bullshit and lies.

That’s not Damen. His word is his bond, it’s tied to his honour and they mean a great deal to him. He never says anything he doesn’t mean. Ever. If it’s coming out of his mouth he is saying that shit with his whole damn chest and doesn't give a fuck.

The few times he is forced to lie or to say something he doesn’t mean he says it as a strategy play but it barely makes it out of his mouth and he hates it.

For a long time by the time they get to Ravenel Damen has been playing a part. Living a half truth and not saying everything he means. Or wants to say.

Likewise, in Akielos, Damen keeps himself held back. We know this because in 3 books, despite being the darling crown prince and heroic military leader, he mentions 1 person by name that he is actually and genuinely close to. One. He’s never been in love with anyone before Laurent, he doesn’t get close, he doesn’t get particularly attached. If he did Jokaste would have been a Princess and not just his mistress.

It speaks of a whole heap of childhood trauma and issues, thanks in large part to his father and Kastor and this picture that is painted of strength in Akielos being The Most Important Thing. (And i have too many thoughts on said implied trauma to write it all out properly here because it's an essay unto itself.)

We also know that Damen does the talking thing with Jokaste too. So we know it's an indicator of intimacy in bed for him. He's certainly not doing it in Vask, for example. Because Damen values words so highly he does wear his heart on his sleeve, but he guards that heart close. Sharing his feelings becomes something then tied to both the value Damen places on words and the lack of emotional intimacy in his life. To Damen, opening up like that especially during sex, is an act of giving unto its self.

Damen is strong, yes. Crazy strong and the perfect warrior. But he also likes the wordy sad poems and has craved approval (and affection) from his father and Kastor seemingly most of his life. For example, Kastor stabbed him and made Damen believe with words that it was a good thing because it meant Kastor respected him enough to fight him like a man.

It’s the perfect anecdote to draw all of those ideas together. Damen being happy about being stabbed at 13 by his brother because Kastor said it was a good thing to be strong enough to fight properly and bear the consequences.

Words matter to Damen, he assumes they do to other people too. It's what nearly gets him killed.

It’s funny really, because Damen values words but he himself is a man of action and Laurent values action but is a man of words.

When it comes to sex we see them swap places from their usual dynamic and therein lies the intimacy.

Laurent acts and Damen talks. It’s a complete role reversal and it was always meant to be. Pacat has said, several times, that Laurent tops Damen with words all the time and it was a purposeful choice to have Laurent bottom because of this. So to follow that through to it's logical conclusion for the sex scenes to really hit we needed to see them swap places completely and Damen needed to talk.

Laurent is a mouthy little shit but when it comes to his important scenes (the building of their intimacy and their sex scenes) it's never his words that he's speaking loudest with. Like when he just hugged Damen after the meeting with Jokaste in KR or when he went to get ice for him in PG, it's an offering in place of words and Laurent does it frequently: letting his actions speak louder than any of his words because to Laurent words don't really matter, lies are too easy. He's been taken in by words before.

Damen gets to Laurent through his actions and it's Laurent's moments of honesty, of saying something unexpected, that make Damen really pay attention. This isn't to say that Laurent's actions don't get to him, they do of course, but only really when Damen comes to realise that's how Laurent is being honest. Likewise in reverse for Laurent.

It's the language the other understands that allows the distance to bridge, but the intimacy comes in the opposite every time.

So when they fall into bed Laurent instigates with action, all three times they are together. And Damen talks. Because it’s the thing that is important to them that they are willingly giving and sharing and that is what makes it intimate.

Quite simply, Damen holds himself back emotionally so talking during sex like that is a way for Damen to let go and to let his partner know that's it not just sex. Laurent, in reverse, shows his want through the instigation and by the time it happens they both know what it means: Laurent never does that and Damen knows it. Laurent knows Damen says what he fucking means.

It's such an intimate sex scene because of that awareness.

In my writing I kind of try to take that and run with it. Damen says what he means and what he wants Laurent to hear, because words of affirmation are important to him personally so he makes sure to share that.

Plus, it’s just sexy, you know? Got to love a man who talks in bed, that sex rough voice when he’s so far gone you know what his saying is just the shit flying through his head?

Hot.

Loved this ask so much. I could literally write a thesis on Damen lmao

#Captive Prince #damen of akielos #Laurent of vere #Capri #asks #I love love love talking about this stuff #idk how much sense it makes but i hope you get the gist lmao #It's like 2am and it's been a looong day so forgive me

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mj0702 · 3 months

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@helen-with-an-a ... I take your raise and go all in...

The whole Barca team was gathered in Mapís and Ingrids garden having a small get together before everyone left for their holidays – or charities as that's how Alexia likes to spend her time off. There where small groups standing together having small conversations amongst themselves while Lucy got suck with the task of grilling the meat wearing a “Don't kiss the cook”-apron which Mapí, Pina and you ignored and smooched your sister quiet theatrical before you all got smacked away with the tongs aggressively. It was a nice warm summer night in Barcelona and everyone was having a good time enjoying the time with their friends. Everyone? Oh no... not everyone.

“ARSENAL??????!!!!!!!!” your voice could be heard from inside the house and probably in the whole neighborhood

The whole team stopped talking and looked towards the living room door which connected the inside with the garden

“ARSENAL???!!!!” you screeched again as you appeared in the door looking with wide eyes at Keira

“What?” your sister shook her head at your actions “You finally lost your plot?”

“Why am I finding out ONLINE you're transferred to ARSENAL??!!” you ignored Lucy and just stared at Keira

“No one...” the blonde started knowing exactly what you meant carefully making her way towards you but you already took a step back “... Bitsy”

“No... no you don't get to call me that anymore you backstabbing B...” you started before your sister interrupted you

“Oy... watch your mouth!” Lucy said getting angry herself – still not knowing what was going on but she didn't raise you to talk to Keira of all people like that

“You know what... I don't care... you're dead to me” you looked Keira straight in the eye your voice full of venom

“Bitsy” the blonde tried again tears forming in her eyes but before she made it to the door you were already gone

“What's going on Kei??” Lucy asked lowly ushering her ex-girlfriend inside getting her away from all those questioning looks from their teammates

“Arsenal offered a LOT of money for me to transfer back home” Keira sniffed as her tears started to fall “Nothing is set in stone but obviously there where rumors...”

“Fuck me” your sister groaned loudly and Ona joined them since she became good friends with Keira before she even started dating Lucy

“What's going on?” the small spaniard asked worried looking around if she could spot you

“My sister is being a plonker again” Lucy said “... she read something online and she didn't come to talk to Kei instead she got to her own conclusions and OF COURSE they are wrong but she's gone now”

“We need to find her....” Keira suddenly stood up wiping her tears away marching towards the door you left through mere minutes ago

“Kei you know it's no use... we'll find her either if the Police picks her up or if she wants to be found.. Barcelona is too big to search it... even if we pull all hands on deck” your sister said after she caught up with her ex-girlfriend holding her back grabbing her wrist

“I need to do something Lucy” the blonde said and Lucy and Ona saw how it stressed the english woman not knowing about your whereabouts

“You need some alcohol in your system” Lucy said pulling Keira back signaling Ona to inform their capitan about what happened

“What if she...” Keira started trying to turn around again

“No what ifs... she'll be back at some point” your sister said firmly “... when did our roles reverse? Normally I'm the one panicking”

“Yeah well she didn't call you a backstabbing bitch and then ran off” the blonde deadpanned while she let Lucy pull her back outside and Ona immediately pushed a beer into the blondes hand

“I knew I would find you here...” you suddenly heard behind you scaring the absolute shit out of you

“Go away” you said harshly as you aggressively wiped away your tears

“No... my english might not be good but we talk” the dark haired spaniard said as she sat down next to you in the sand looking at the Ocean

“No offense but you ask people if they work” you said raising your eyebrow

“Yeah well she was at every game... I got... confundida” Aitana shrugged her shoulders

“You what?” you looked at her confused

“Confundida... ehrm.. I not know if she works” the dark haired looked at you and suddenly understood what she meant

“Confused... the word is confused” you smiled very lightly

“Sí... confused... but that's not the... punto...” Aitana said before she thought for a second “... point... that's not the point why I walked away from a great party”

“You can walk right back... I'm not stopping you” you said defensively

“I can't... you hurt mi hermanita” the spaniard said sternly and for the first time you saw the protective side of Aitana Bonmatí off the field

“Your what?” you tried to dodge the bullet – you knew very well what “hermanita” meant

“Stop it... you hurt Keira... I want to know why” Aitana said looking straight at you while you kept your eyes trained forward watching the Ocean

“You wouldn't understand” you said sadly laying your head on your knees hugging your legs

“Then try to understand me” the dark haired said a little softer as your body language told her you try to close yourself off and she needed to act quickly

“It's easier to hurt than get hurt... It's easier to end something then being ended... she's leaving... she's leaving not only Barcelona but me too... She left before – but she left to come here... I knew it got easier again to see Lucy AND Keira again... but now? I don't want to go back to England... I rather go to Germany... but I want me family in one Place... Luce and Ona are great... they're good for each other... but no one can take Keiras place... so I rather push her away and make her hate me than to see her go through Security here in Barcelona for the last time knowing she's not coming back” it suddenly broke out of you at some point your voice cracking and Aitana saw the tears rolling down your cheeks but let you talk “... I love Leah and Beth and Kyra and everyone at Arsenal... but it's not Keiras club... not her style... Her club is City.... it's the only Jersey that fits her except for the national one... Arsenal wouldn't even know what to do with someone as good as Kei...”

“So you thought spitting... names at her would work out in your favor?” Aitana asked lowly trying to get to the ground of your actions

“I didn't think... I just got so angry...” you cried silently “.. Lucy did the same you know.. when she left for Lyon... she didn't tell me... I found out online.... I never thought Kei would do the same”

“What's the real problem?” the spaniard pushed you slightly knowing that wouldn't be all

“She... she.... she...” you started to cry harder and even you were a part of the team now Aitana and you weren't super close but now the spaniard carefully pulled you into her side

“It's okay bebé... está bien bebé... déjalo salir... encontraremos una solución...” Aitana mumbled against your hair holding you closely while you sobbed heartbreakingly into her shirt

“She'll forget about me...” you sobbed out fisting Aitas shirt not knowing what else to do

“Y/n... we don't even know if she is leaving – yes, Arsenal offered money for her but Barca is not interested in letting her go... neither is Keira – she doesn't want to leave” the spaniard said softly

“She'll just forget about me” you sobbed not getting control over your emotions

“She would never” Aitana kept her soft tone “... you ARE her pequeño... even if she got hit in the head and doesn't remember her own name – she'll never olvidar tú”

“Why would she never olive? She hates olives” you calmed down a little bit but still couldn't stop the tears

“Olvidar... you speak catalan but not spanish?” Aitana chuckled at your confusion and started do wipe your tears away with her thumb “She'll never forget you bebé”

“I could never Bitsy... and whatever you throw at me I won't go away... you are to important to me to let you go or give up chasing after you” you heard Keiras voice behind you and before you even started thinking about it your body reacted and you pushed yourself off Aitana springing up running.

This time Keira knew what your reaction would be and reacted faster than you so you ran straight into her and before you knew what was happening Keira held you in a death grip against her.

“Calm Bits... it's okay... you're okay... sssshhh... calm down” the blonde whispered against your hair as you tried to fight her

“.... you're okay...” Keira repeated it over and over again until your fighting got less and she felt the tears against her neck and how you suddenly cling to her like your life depended on it

Keira looked up meeting Aitanas sorrowful look and mouthed a “Gracias” at her friend as she kept hold of you swaying you slightly from left to right trying to calm you down

#keira walsh x reader #barca femeni #woso image

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room-surprise · 4 months

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Laios is terrified of parenthood: Why?

Laios (Λάϊος) is an ancient Greek name. Sometimes it is translated as Laius, but these are both spellings of Λάϊος, which can also be transliterated as Láïos.

Laios comes from λαιϝός, from Proto-Indo-European lehiwos, and can mean left (the opposite of right), and awkward.

There are two mythological figures named Laios, but right now I'm going to focus on one of them: Oedipus' father, Laios the king of Thebes.

This mythical Laios did some particularly vile kidnapping, rape, and violated the laws of hospitality. As a result, he and his entire bloodline was cursed by the gods.

Laios’ sins are primarily focused around the violation of social taboos, engaging in inappropriate relationships, and being unable to restrain himself from hurting others with his actions. He is also depicted as rude and violent.

Laios’ punishment was that his son would someday kill him and marry his wife. In order to avoid this, he pierced his newborn son’s ankles so he would not be able to crawl, and abandoned him in the countryside to die. The child was found by shepherds, who took him to the nearest king, who adopted the boy and named him Oedipus, for his swollen feet.

When Oedipus was told by an oracle that he would kill his father and marry his mother, Oedipus, not knowing that he was adopted, immediately fled his home to avoid harming his beloved parents. While on the road, he encountered king Laios on a narrow road. Laios ordered Oedipus to move out of the way, and Oedipus hesitated too long, so the king nearly ran him over. Furious at Laios’ rudeness, Oedipus dragged him from his chariot and killed him.

The “Laios complex” in psychology is named after the character in the Oedipus myth, and it is described as when a father desires to kill his children, especially his sons, in order to leave behind no successors.

This name is a fascinating choice on Kui's part.

As a low-level nobleman in a historical setting, one of Laios' overarching life responsibilities is to marry a woman, reproduce, and make sure those children grow up to fill his position in society when he dies. Laios in Dungeon Meshi has a very bad relationship with his parents, especially his father, as well as issues with children and parenthood, and when you combine that with the subtext of his name indicating a fear of having children/sons, it paints a very interesting picture of our strange protagonist.

We know that one of Laios’ deepest psychological wounds, attacked by the nightmare clams, is his parents demanding he return home to the village and give them grandchildren. This is a recurring nightmare he has, so it must bother him significantly.

He also becomes so uncomfortable watching a loving father-baby interaction in the living paintings, that he can’t even try to eat food, even though he’s very hungry. This behavior makes no sense without the context of Laios' fear/aversion to father/child relationships.

Finally, in a “what if?” comic about reversing the character’s sexes, the idea that if Laios had been born a woman, he would have never left the village and have birthed children. Female Laios is shown holding a baby, looking miserable, and regular Laios seems quite upset. He says that the current timeline, despite everything that has gone wrong, is “the best one.”

This is speculation, but all of this taken together suggests that Laios may actually feel fear, disgust or revulsion towards the idea of having or raising children.

This could be because he doesn’t feel comfortable acting out the role of husband and father that he feels society demands of him, or because he’s afraid of hurting his children the way he was hurt by his parents, or it may simply be a visceral discomfort at the idea of reproduction, something which some people experience for a number of reasons.

This fear could even be taken as evidence (among other data points) suggesting that Laios might be asexual and/or aromantic, though these sort of fears are of course not unique to people on that spectrum.

Of course, none of this means that Laios could never, or would never have children, but it suggests that this fear is central to his character, and understanding this is important to understanding who Laios is, and why he does the things he does.

(This is an excerpt from Chapter 4 of my essay about the real world cultural and linguistic references in Dungeon Meshi! You can read it here.)

#dungeon meshi #delicious in dungeon #laios #laios touden #laois touden #laios thorden #laius thorden #laius touden #The Essay

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retromotherfuckers · 8 months

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Violet Eyes, Red

Pairing:

rhysand x reader (pretty sure it's gender neutral - there might be a "she" i missed while referring to you from the original draft bc second person pov is not how i write)

Summary:

you and your mate reunite after feyre defeats amarantha and this is the fallout of what the bitch did to him.

Warnings:

aftermath of SA - i can't really tell if it's graphic which tells me it is, loose description of a panic attack, PTSD, please let me know if I missed anything. guys, please, if these topics are triggering for you, don't read this fic. i am not responsible for your media consumption, but i also don't want to throw you headfirst into your trauma.

Word Count:

2,140

A/N:

literally broke my own damn heart with this one. rhys' trauma is so ignored and that needed to be rectified. rhys might be my second favorite bat boy, but he's still a lil baby who needs to be protected

The human girl had beaten her - the woman of his nightmares - once and for all. At the first moment he could, Rhysand winnowed. After fifty years, he knew there was only one place he could go. After all, it was the last Sunday of the month, and that Sunday was the day he and his mate reserved just for themselves. The High Lord and Lady would not conduct any business on that day.

You'd spend most of your day on the balcony. You'd serenade him with the piano. You'd fly around Velaris - creating patterns in the air. You'd cradle each other in your arms. He'd sketch out a new drawing - trying and failing, in his opinion, to encapsulate your true beauty.

One day, he broke that promise, that vow you had made, and went to what he thought was a simple trade meeting. That morning was the last day he saw you, and he still couldn't live with himself.

Those memories alone kept him breathing at times. When Amarantha stole his bed, his body, his hope.

Then the human girl showed up, and he tried to help her. Wanted to give her what she needed to beat the beast he didn't think he'd ever escape. But he had lost the will to pray for it. To the cauldron, to the Mother Above. Despite his pessimism, she persevered. The girl had won. And then he was free.

He was on the balcony before he could even think about it. After a quick glance around, he realized it was empty. At first, he felt a pulse of disappointment, but with the realization of how long it'd been, he breathed deeply. How could he expect you to keep up the tradition? Fifty years of solitude on those Sundays would have made him mad if your roles were reversed.

At the thought, he allowed himself to feel the mating bond. It had gone cold the moment he winnowed away all those years ago, but now it was as beautiful as he remembered. The pull of another person at the end of a tether, forever binding them in the purest forms of fate.

But he heard your thoughts, and he almost broke down in sobs at the sound of your voice in his head. Please come home, my love. I don't know how to do this anymore. Please. The last word, you were begging. Your inner voice, the one he had to get used to living without, was broken. Pleading for him to return - despite everything you'd probably heard.

And with that, he took action, winnowing to every room in the house so he would find you as soon as possible. He knew you were close; your scent wasn't stale. It was fresh, clinging to every piece of furniture you owned together.

It was the last room he checked, his office, where he found you. You sat in his desk chair; the leather more worn than he remembered. But the sight of you stopped him from rushing to you. Nursing a bottle of wine, you slouched on your elbows, hands in your hair, as more thoughts streamed through the bond.

I'm losing myself, Rhys. I don't know how much more of this I can take. I can't let myself believe you won't come back because that- that will ruin me. What she's doing to you, what she's making you do. I don't even know a fraction of it, but I can't stop it. I- I can't protect you. And I hate myself for it.

He was watching you as you sent the words down the bond, the bond that had been desolate for half a century. You run your hands down your face, not looking up from your wine, the third of many you planned to drown in.

Just get through it. Please just- just survive. Do what you have to do to come home. I'll be here. I love you. My mate.

You'd only allowed yourself to talk to him once a month. Initially, you would try to send him something every day. Thoughts, images, songs you'd learned, prayers for him. You never heard anything back, and it slowly started eating away at you. It shattered your hope every time you didn't get a response.

You'd heard the rumors, Amarantha's whore, he'd been called. Every time you heard it, it ate away at you more and more. As if he would choose that - choose to warm the bed of another when you were waiting for him at home. You knew him better than that, and you winced at the thought. He wouldn't choose it, but would she force him? Was she that much of a monster?

You had to shake that thought away for the thousandth time that night, downing the rest of the glass. As you reach for the bottle, nearly empty at that point, a hand wraps around your wrist. The touch is gentle but firm - stopping you from drinking more, but not rough enough to hurt. Instead of startling at it, the wine slows your instincts. You can only stare. The tattoos on the dorsal side interweave into vines under the sleeve. Vines you know, vines that you've held, vines that have and will continue to have free rein of your body.

Faster than you thought you were capable of, your eyes flew to its owner's eyes. Violet. The most ravishing violet. Violet you'd feared you were forgetting.

With a new urgency, you pulled yourself to your feet, your hands flying up to his face without thinking. One on his cheek, the other on his neck, pushing, pulling, grabbing, unsure if it was your mind playing tricks on you.

In your desperate touch, you missed the way he flinched.

His hands. Mother Above, his beautiful hands were on your neck too, placed at the sides. When your mind would play you for a fool, it would never let you touch him, let alone allow him to reach you. But there he was, and you could feel him. You tugged at the bond, finally noticing it was warm and delicate and sweet and serene and everything you wished you knew how to describe.

He breathed your name, barely a whisper. "I'm home, my darling. I'm home."

"You're here." The words barely escaped you, and you couldn't stop the tears. He didn't hesitate a moment, pulling you in for a frustratingly rare and fierce embrace. You clung to each other for dear life, tighter and tighter and tighter, like he'd disappear if you let him go. Frankly, you weren't convinced he wouldn't. "You're really here."

You stood like that for a while, holding each other, when he ultimately pulled away first. "Rh-Rhys, don't go-"

"I'm not," he promised, his voice raw, kissing your forehead. He took in every inch of your face. "I just wanted to look at you. My mate."

Since Rhys had been freed by the human girl, nothing had been normal. Not that you expected it to be, but you didn't anticipate just how awful a recovery for him would be. He couldn't share your bed, and you didn't mean that in a sexual manner. He couldn't sleep with anyone else in his room - if he had even been sleeping at all. He could barely stand to be touched. You knew he wanted to be able to let you, but every time you seemed to blink, he would flinch.

You had suspicions about what went on under the mountain, but you had no idea it would be so evil.

He stood before a cabinet, staring blankly into it, lost in a memory - a memory he'd been refusing to share. You understood why, but something in you told you that you needed to see. Not just for curiosity's sake but to know how to help him. Even if it was past your pay grade.

"Rhys," You called quietly for the second time. You didn't want to touch him, shock him back to reality. The fear of that setting him off more held you back. With a harsh and sudden breath, he fearfully glanced at you and around the room, forgetting where he was for a moment. "You're at home, Rhys. You came home."

"I'm sorry," He rasped, ignoring your words. His hands pulled at his hair, and you were nervous he'd start ripping it out. He backed away from you, so far away he was caught by the wall. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

Your own formed at the sight of his tears, but you couldn't conjure up what he'd have to apologize for. "It's okay, honey, you're safe. It's okay."

"I didn't- I didn't want it. I swear on my life, I didn't want to."

You shook your head, not understanding. But you knew asking what he was apologizing for was the wrong thing to do. You could see it, the shame, the regret, the blame. "I know you didn't."

He squeezed his eyes shut, buried his face in his hands, and sank to the floor. He kept murmuring apologies, pleading for your forgiveness. "I betrayed you, you have to- you have to leave me."

His words shocked you, and now you were the one that flinched. "Rhysand, look at me." He visibly shrunk at the command, pulling his hands away from his face. "As far as I'm concerned, anything that happened...there...is the furthest thing from your fault. I know there are things you can't tell me, and that's okay. I'll be here when you're ready-"

"I can't!" He bellowed. "You'll never forgive-"

"Show me the memory." You demanded, your voice quiet but assertive. But you wouldn't push too hard if he was adamant about keeping you out. You knew. You knew. Based on the way he had been acting, what had happened. But you also knew he needed to show you. So someone, fucking someone, would tell him it was out of his control. He couldn't govern everything, even if he was the High Lord of the Night Court. The words hurt as they left your lips. "Because I can promise you that I will."

You weren't a daemati, but you could see him battling with himself. Debating, if showing you what really happened, would bury him deeper under the surface or pull him back up for air.

Eventually, he released a rare sob and a barely audible "Okay."

He showed you the first time, how he just laid there like a statue as her hands took everything for herself. Then, the fifth time, when she started demanding he respond, pretend he wanted it. Then, the eleventh time, when his body started reacting. Then, by the next time, he had stopped keeping count.

He showed you, whether he meant to or not, how he prayed for it to end, prayed for someone to rescue him.

How he had been praying for you.

With the confirmation of your theory, you squeezed your eyes shut, trying and failing to hold back the tears. The angry tears, wishing you could've been the one to rip her throat out. Tears that enraged you because that was not Tamlin's kill. Furious tears because that wasn't even your kill. Devastating tears because your mate not only had to play a character for so long, but he had to endure being called her whore. Like he had any fucking say.

Overwhelming tears because your mate was in pain and there was shit all you could do about it.

"Can I touch you?" The question shocks him, but he nods without thinking, confused at the request. You slowly lift your hands to his cheeks, brushing away his tears with your thumbs. "There is nothing for me to forgive you for. I know you didn't want to do any of it."

"But I-"

"Bodies respond to stimulation whether it's wanted or not. It's how we work." You explained slowly and carefully, keeping direct eye contact. "You forget, sweetheart. I can hear your thoughts when you show me a memory."

"I've-" His voice caught, putting his hands on your wrists, rubbing them up and down your arms until they got hot. "I've been so scared. That it's still happening. That all of this is going to go away, that she's not really gone, that I'm not really here, and this is just another tactic-"

You shake your head, finally pulling yourself together to say what you've wanted to say for weeks. "I swear on my life that I will never let anyone hurt you like that again. I will spend eternity protecting you from her and anyone like her. And if you forget that this is real, just ask me. I'll tell you."

His eyes darted between yours, furiously blinking. Violet eyes, red. Pleading craving begging praying.

"Is it?"

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sapphire-weapon · 1 year

Text

When Capcom sat down to write RE4make and Separate Ways, they had to have a moment of reckoning when it came to Ada's character:

Do they continue to write out her romance with Leon, or

Do they commit to her role as an ambiguous third party agent keeping her fingers in all of the pies?

They chose the latter. They chose the latter because it was more important, narratively. And they couldn't have both, because having both doesn't make any fucking sense and never has made any fucking sense.

Ada is a selfish character, at her core. To have her constantly be soft for Leon undermines that selfishness and makes her other actions not make any sense; if she cared that much about him, why would she continuously serve the bad guys that make his life a living hell? And the reverse is also true. Why would she care so much about Leon if all he does is get in her way and act as a distraction for her?

So anyone who complains that RE4make's Separate Ways didn't show Ada caring enough about Leon -- that was the point. They solidified her identity as a character by doing that.

The writers of the Remake series made a conscious decision to make Leon and Ada's interactions/relationship in RE2make serve an actual function/purpose for their characters instead of "uwu they're in love."

For Leon -- Ada taught him that the people opposed to him aren't always bad guys. She taught him the true lesson of "the road to Hell is paved with good intentions." He learned to trust that little voice in the back of his head that tells him "something's not right here." She also taught him that there's a way to do the right thing without following the rules -- and, sometimes, by breaking them entirely.

For Ada -- Leon taught her that being independent doesn't mean self-isolating -- because just looking out for herself and no one else actually resulted in her just keeping her head down and not asking questions, which screwed her over big time in the end. Leon didn't teach her love or compassion or empathy; he showed her that she was actually being just as naive as he was, just on the other side of the fight.

Basically, they both taught each other: QUESTION EVERYTHING. Because that was the one thing that neither of them did in RE2make until it was way, way too late.

And so, in RE4make/Separate Ways, Ada spends far less time and emotional energy worrying about Leon because she's actually taking the lesson he taught her to heart and she's questioning the people and circumstances around her in order to protect herself. That was the point of her early voiceover about how Raccoon City changed her perspective and made her start asking where her efforts were going and why she was doing what she was sent to do.

She doesn't ask questions for moral reasons. She asks them for selfish ones. Because Ada is an inherently selfish character.

On the boat, Leon asks Ada: "Are you just trying to use me again?" and Separate Ways answers and repeats over and over and over again: YES. The only reason she helps Leon in the village and at Mendez's house is so that he can continue being useful for her. Because Leon didn't teach her to care about people; Leon only taught her how to better take care of herself -- the same way she did for him.

This is a really damning exchange of words:

So, yes -- Ada is using Leon in RE4make. Yes, she only helps him because it benefits her. No, she genuinely doesn't care whether he lives or dies. Yes, she meant it when she told Leon to leave Ashley for dead, and yes, her sole reason for doing it was to get Ashley out of the way because Ada found Leon's new demeanor hot and she wanted to fuck him. No, she had no intention of taking Ashley with them on the chopper at the end -- because yes, her invitation to Leon was a bookend to her earlier offer for Leon to leave Ashley and go fuck her (Ada) instead.

And that's why Leon tells her to go fuck herself and shakes his head in utter disbelief when she asks if he's coming with her.

Because Ada is a selfish character.

I don't say this to hate on the character or even express dislike for her. This doesn't make her a bad character -- in fact, the opposite is true. It makes her consistent, which makes her a better written character overall from what/who she was in OG.

It also doesn't make her evil or a bad guy. Ada Wong is the most Chaotic Neutral character in the entire RE series -- even moreso than Billy Coen or Jake Muller ever were. She's in it for herself, and that particular approach is neither inherently morally good nor evil.

But Aeon is dead canonically in the Remake-verse. It was sacrificed in the name of bringing consistency and logic to both characters.

And that was the true point of the boat scene.

Neither of them have changed who they are at their most fundamental level. Leon is still the selfless hero, and Ada is still the selfish spy. Their relationship in RE2make served as a strengthening of those core traits -- not an erosion of them. Leon can better protect and save Ashley because of the lessons that Ada taught him, and Ada can successfully outmaneuver Wesker because of the lessons that Leon taught her.

But that doesn't change who she is. It doesn't change who either of them are. In fact, it only served to create a more authentic version of them both. Leon is more zealous in his heroism, and Ada is more committed to her own self-preservation and naked about her selfish intentions.

The only people in RE4make who changed who they were were Luis and Krauser. Luis for the better, and Krauser for the worse. And they both paid for it with their lives.

#resident evil 4 #separate ways #leon kennedy #ada wong #meta analysis

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punkeropercyjackson · 1 month

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An aspect of Hobie as an afropunk character that isn't talked about and appreciated enough(or ever really)is how humanized he is.So often punk male characters are stuckup white boys with consent issues and no real street cred due to whitewashing of punk culture as an inherently black scene per our history but Hobie's afropunk and he ain't no oreo.He's darkskin,his nose and lips are so big,his eyes are far apart,his brow is strong,he has wicks which are one of the most frowned upon hairstyles on black folks despite how nice they are,he's 6'5,he's ACTUALLY tall dark and handsome and they went nuts with him and i'm eternally impressed with how beautiful he is not 'inspite' of his blackness like is often potrayed but because of his blackness

Hobie is so open and softhearted and fun and he plays it into his beliefs and actions,not contradicting them as a sort of gag,he's multifaced and his personality traits overlap and contrast all at once.That's what people are like in real life but very rarely is that nuanse allowed to exist in black people as we aren't seen as,well,people.Hobie isn't demonized or made it to need to be put on a leash for hating authority and beating up bigots and even killing a cop.He's light as a role model for it.He's cringe sometimes,he does underaged drinking,he makes ridicilous facial expressions nonstop,he's got a big ego even if it's justified,he's a dad friend,he's an adultified black kids allegory,his personal(official)playlist is all actual punk songs,not Avril or Fob or P!atd,he loves the sea enough as a jamaican-english kid he choose a houseboat as his residense back when he was homeless,a concept art had him have a cat charm on his Watch,he plays guitar and uses it as a weapon,he's trans unlabeled and a black femme,he's definitely ptsd and audhd and never learned how to mask as so many black autistics people don't

And this is gonna be controversial but the implied romance with Gwen was a wonderful addition to his character.Gwen is punk too,she's canonically pastel punk and a trans girl and as trauma induced mentally ill and no masking game audhd-coded as Hobie is and their dynamic is symbolism for the intertwienment between blackness and transfeminism in punk history and a show of solidarity between different yet fundamentally similar aspects of punk and they get to bond over being troubled but good kids and punks and Gwen is so enamored with Hobie she can't help but yap about him to Miles and steal his clothes in a classic girlfriend move and flirt back when he initiates it despite how flustered she gets and the non-sexual intimacy of her living with him part time just the two of them and we know it's the non-sexual kind since them hooking up is what society expects of teenagers in love but punks don't care about conforming for normies and Hobie went out of his way to make reverse racism real on Gwen's abusive dad's ass and even forced him to leave her his love note.They're so important to eachother and the only thing stopping Ghostpunk from being the absolute perfect ship is the Spiderverse crew dropping the ball by not making Gwen a half white afrolatina(she is to me though.imma do my own thing)

Hobie Browns exists all over our existense and always have.He's the black punk kids from the 1970s,he's the black punk kids of today,he's the black punk kids i'm friends with and have pseudo-adopted as my younger siblings/kids as an older afrosolarpunk and them lacking positive adult figures in their lives so i do my best to give them what they need and want,he's ME when i was 17 and we're still so alike.I don't give two shits if i sound like a fucking geek,he genuinely means so much to me and i love him with my entire heart and soul and he would've changed my life as a lonely anarchistic afro-caribbean kid who felt like the bad guy no matter what i did or how hard i tried to be good and i'm so happy i can be what i didn't get to have to my honorary younger siblings/kids and help strangers and do all i can to fight to change the system,that i can be like Hobie and that Hobie is like Hobie instead of palpable to nonblacks

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redclercs · 1 year

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DELICATE✰ CHARLES LECLERC.

x. what a shame she's fucked in the head.

— the one where they tell you what your word is worth.

❝𝘈𝘯𝘥 𝘣𝘢𝘣𝘺, 𝘐 𝘨𝘦𝘵 𝘮𝘺𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘧𝘪𝘦𝘥 𝘣𝘺 𝘩𝘰𝘸 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘤𝘪𝘵𝘺 𝘴𝘤𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘮𝘴 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘯𝘢𝘮𝘦❞ —𝘛𝘢𝘺𝘭𝘰𝘳 𝘚𝘸𝘪𝘧𝘵, 𝘊𝘰𝘳𝘯𝘦𝘭𝘪𝘢 𝘚𝘵𝘳𝘦𝘦𝘵.

warnings: abuse downplay, bashing towards taylor swift (i obviously adore her pls don't come for me haha), online bullying, new york inaccuracies, corny taylor references per usual, etc. 2k words + articles

in my head there's a mix of begin again and cornelia street playing as background music.

masterlist ✢ next

NO one likes a mad woman, but not for the reasons Taylor Swift made you believe in the lyrics of her 2020 song. Although we are definitely afraid y/n might get 'more crazy'.

Honestly, who gave her the right to speak like that about Aidan Kim? As it turns out, the three-year relationships she willingly stayed on was a 'dead-end' one, and Aidan "abused" (and I cannot stress the quotations enough) her through several stages of their shared time.

Well, I call bullshit.

How is it that after Aidan Kim helped her build whatever she has going on that people call a 'career' she wasn't bothered about being told 'how to look and how to act' (direct quote from her own video, by the way).

Breaking up with your sneaky link and calling him your friend won't save what you did before, y/n, it's the oldes trick in the book. Everything she said in her Youtube video, one I regretfully watched despite the knowledge that I won't get those 45 minutes of my life back, is rehearsed and calculated and just tried to paint the real victims in a bad light.

Playing the victim worked for Taylor Swift in 2009, 2017, 2019... but we surely won't let it happen again, right folks? y/n needs a new tactic to crawl back from the hell, because we're not believing anything that comes out of her mouth anymore.

It's true what they say, an untalented actress makes an untalented liar.

By Lia Yim

Victoria Presley is worried about best friend's y/n y/ln's well-being after the actress 'completely ghosted her' since moving back to New York.

"One day we were fine and the next, she had packed her bags and left my house," Presley said in an exclusive interview with iNTouch. "I'm not going to lie, I was deeply hurt by her actions. I offered her my home as a safe haven and she left without explanation."

y/n had been living in Victorias Los Angeles home since mid-February until this month when she returned to her infamous SoHo apartment, one she shared with Aidan Kim until their breakup.

"I can find it in my heart to forgive her, of course," 'Vic', as she's known on social media, added. "Right now, I just want my best friend back. I want the y/n I've known for years and not this person she became since Matilde Bassi and Charles Leclerc inserted themselves in her life."

Victoria Presley, the founder and CEO of Presley Beauty, is the daughter of Luke Presley and Claire Walker and has been in the influencing business for a few years now.

"If y/n ends up reading this, I want her to know that I will support her decisions but not in the way her new 'friends' are doing. I just want what's best for her."

SEE ALSO:

→ Vic Presley on having to start from zero: "I'm not a nepobaby!"

→ A look inside y/n's SoHo apartment, the one Aidan Kim paid for.

→ Is Charles Leclerc's career going downhill thanks to y/n?

By Beatrice Mann

With y/n y/ln's latest controversy, the whole world has turned their backs on the actress. But, is it really that bad? Or is it just because she's a woman in the business?

The online community's hottest topic is y/n's Youtube video where she speaks on her relationship with Aidan Kim, her friendship with Charles Leclerc and, most importantly, how all of this has affected her career. And I want to tell you all, y/n is right.

If the roles were reversed, Aidan Kim would be thriving on a newly unlocked 'Heartbreaker' persona and y/n would still be constantly humiliated for not being 'wife material'.

I believe y/n deserves much better than what she's getting. The woman admitted she escaped a relationship where her partner LAUGHED at her and manipulated her actions for his comfort. And people are still siding with the man? Seriously, people, use your brains and dig up your morals!

The only thing we're communicating to younger generations by constantly doubting women's words and putting them in the spotlight for standing up for themselves, is that only men's words are worth something.

June 14th, Manhattan, New York.

It isn't much of a surprise when Charles calls you while you're trying to get your Moka pot to work that morning. It's your third attempt at it and the previous mornings you've left it alone with tears in your eyes to walk down the street and get Starbucks coffee. You might be a little too attached to that coffee maker.

Charles got to New York city the previous night, and reminded you that you promised to show him around more than once. You intended to keep your promise, thinking you would have more time before the day came.

But as you walk to the restaurant where you decided to meet him, you can't help but think how exciting it is that you get to show the city you love so much to Charles. And just like that morning in Monaco, you can't help but remind yourself that this is a friendly get-together.

Charles has slowly, but surely, become one of your closest friends in the middle of the frenzy that your life is. With your ex-best friend saying you walked out on her and your failed fiancé insisting that it was you, who acted like a 'total psychopath' towards the end of your relationship, you have more fingers than people you can count on.

You watch him carefully as he smooths the napkin on his legs twice and then drops in on the table again, fidgeting with the loose threads in the corner.

Your wristwatch says it's 10:00 am, which is the exact time you agreed to meet. You wonder how long he's been waiting if there's an empty cup of coffee in front of him.

"You know, it's also rude to be too early for a meeting," you say as a form of greeting once you approach the table.

This startles him enough to drop the napkin on his lap again, proceeding to scramble to return it to the table before pushing his chair out to get up.

You chuckle, but before you can say you were joking, Charles is engulfing you in a hug. Your stomach flutters because of the way he holds the back of your head with his palm. It feels like you're being reunited after months instead of just two weeks. Time doesn't feel real sometimes, you would know.

"Soleil!" he says excitedly, putting his hands on your shoulders. "It's so good to see you,"

"It's nice to see you too, Charlie."

There's the nickname again. You've tried not to think too hard about it. Is it a European thing to call your friends that? When you asked him about it the last time he called before taking his flight to New York, his response was a simple 'it suits you'.

Charles pulls your chair for you and grabs your purse to place it on the empty chair between you two. He grabs his napkin again, pulling one last time on a thread before smoothing it down and forgetting about it.

"How are you?" Charles asks, a bright smile on his face. It falters in a barely perceptible way because he doesn't want to give you bad thoughts, which seem to come automatically every time the question is asked.

"Well, I'm okay," you assure in a soothing tone, "Still looking for jobs. And you?"

"Alright. Lots of work in the simulator and I'm hoping this is a good weekend,"

"Are you sure you'll be okay getting to Montreal tomorrow?" you smile at the waitress that approaches your table, "Can I have some coffee, please?"

"Of course," Charles assures, with a gesture of his hand. He's getting to Montreal at seven in the morning and running straight to his motorhome. "There's time for everything."

"What do you want to do, then?"

You don't want to exhaust him by showing him around New York, he has a long weekend ahead. To be honest, you really wonder what compelled him to make this stop instead of going straight to Canada. Sure you had talked about him coming to New York, eventually. Not a day before he had to start his Grand Prix weekend.

"Anything you want us to do," he replies, the single-dimpled smile on his face. "I'm open to anything."

"MoMA? Central Park? Something not so touristy?" you suggest, before thanking the waitress as she places a hot cup of coffee on the table.

"Just show me the places you like, y/n, don't stress about it." Charles laughs, eyes returning to the open menu in front of him. "I only care about hanging out with you."

"Thanks," is all you manage to say as you sip the scalding coffee, you do your best not to wince as it burns your tongue and down your throat. "Let's do it then."

"So, what do you think? Everything you expected and more?"

You're taking a walk in Central Park after Charles agreed to see the Alice in Wonderland statue. It's a warm morning in New York and although you haven't been walking around for that long, Charles seems content enough with what he's seen.

"It's very... you," Charles replies, and you're sure he means it as a compliment, but New York can be really ugly too. "In a good way!" he adds when he sees your expression.

"Thank you, Charlie." you laugh again. It's easy being with Charles, laughing with sincerity and really being in what's happening in the moment.

You didn't lie when you said you weren't afraid of speaking up anymore, but the dread of actually doing it is inevitable. Your words are being twisted and marked as false because Aidan is far 'more loved' than you are. Not to mention Victoria's interview about your lack of reciprocity to her humble feelings

You're still thinking about suing her. But it hurts to know that she was your best friend a week ago.

A few people stop you both to ask for pictures and autographs on the back of phone cases. A few of them ignore you, others smile politely at Charles before asking him to take their picture with you.

"I'm really polishing my photographing skills," Charles jokes as you walk away from a group of young girls who gush about how much they wish they could dress like you.

"Sorry if it bothers you," you whisper, looking at him only from the corner of your eye.

"Of course not, y/n. They ask nicely, and you're okay with it." he shrugs.

There was one time when a teenager, around fourteen or fifteeen, asked Aidan if he could please take a picture of her and yourself. It was an innocent question, she had already acknowledged him as 'that guy from Star-5' and how he'd been in Supercut with you.

But just by the way you saw his expression change, you told the girl a selfie was a better option, you would hold the phone yourself if she was okay with it.

You didn't hear the end of it for the rest of night. Aidan berated your career for the first time of many, saying it was frankly offensive that he’d been treated that way. It didn't matter that you told him the girl was barely a teen and she hadn't been rude. Still, he was more famous than you, he didn't deserve to be made felt like the opposite.

"What are you thinking?" Charles asks, touching your shoulder gently to make you pause your walk.

You really don't want to admit you were thinking about your ex-boyfriend. Not that it matters, Charles knows you think about Aidan often in a mostly negative light, but it feels weird to say it here. So you shrug and sigh. "I wish I thought of nothing, to be honest."

Charles squeezes your shoulder in a half hug. He doesn't push your boundaries, although he wishes he knew what was actually going through your mind.

─────────

It's when you two are having dinner in a restaurant in SoHo that Charles asks the question that has been eating him away since he landed in New York the previous night.

"Do you want to come to Canada with me?"

"Am I not blacklisted from the paddock?" you tease, although Elix is gone. You wonder if Ferrari people blame you a little bit for their sponsor dropping them.

"Absolutely not," Charles frowns, "And you would be my guest, you get to be in the Ferrari Suite like always."

"Thank you, Charlie–"

Charles tries not to seem disappointed as he waits for the 'but' to follow, so he drinks from his wine.

"—but I have some back to back things to do this weekend," you do regret not being able to make it, you loved the few Grand Prix you were able to attend and you would love to see Carlos too. But you have booked a few interviews with people who, more than anything want to consume gossip, but have disguised it as 'letting you tell your truth in more depth'. You cannot back down from what you started.

"That's okay," he assures with a quick wink. "You know you can come to races whenever you want to, though, right?"

"I can?" you raise both eyebrows and Charles rolls his eyes. "The benefits of having a Ferrari driver as a friend. I should have befriended you sooner."

"Very funny," he says as he hides his smile behind his glass of wine again. "Do I get invited to the Red Carpets?"

"You kind of befriended me at the downfall of my career. It's going to take a while for you to be on a Red Carpet."

Charles clicks his tongue and shakes his head. "You're only just getting started, soleil. Don't say that."

You hope he's right, because you have castings lined-up for next week too and you don't want to call him, or Mati, or your mom, crying about how unwanted you feel.

You shrug, drinking from your own wine.

"I'm being serious, y/n," Charles' tone is stern for a moment, yet not aggressive. "You have a lot of wonderful things to do in the future."

"Yeah, thanks." you dislike yourself for ruining the mood yet again, but Charles isn't bothered as he smiles at you once again.

"I mean it,"

He does, and so does Mati, and your mom. You are bound for great things, although they're taking time to find you right now.

"I know. Thank you Charlie, you're very kind. I hope you have a good race this weekend."

Charles huffs. "Yes, me too. Wish me luck?"

"I feel like I jinx you more than help you, Charlie."

"You didn't wish me luck in Spain, look how that went," he fakes a shudder and you snort. You hated every minute spent in Spain after FP3.

"Good luck, you'll do great." You pat the hand that he keeps on top of the table a couple times and before you can take your hand back, he grabs it, giving it a gentle squeeze.

Your heart races and you take a deep, sharp breath, like that would help it go back to normal. You have tried not to overanalyze everything about today, from the way Charles looked to the words he said, to the way your body responded to it. You don't want to go down that specific spiral.

"Thanks for stopping by," you take your hand back and keep it busy with your almost empty glass of wine. The alcohol has turned your cheeks warm. "You really want to see New York, huh?"

"I really wanted to see you," Charles replies, nonchalantly.

And you know you'll be spiraling, despite your best efforts.

─── team principal radio: ❝thanks for reading! also thank you so so so much because last chapter got to 1k+ interactions and i was beyond shocked!! it means a lot that you're enjoying delicate!♡❞

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zeroducks-2 · 5 months

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Do you really think reverse flash is in love with Barry? I don't mean for this to sound snarky I'm just confused. Thawne killed Barry's mom how can you say he's in love with him? I like all the things you post and rb about them I really enjoy the ship. I just don't get it can you explain?

The question "how can Eobard be in love with Barry if he hurt him" has both a short answer and a long answer. The short answer is that people are very much capable of hurting the ones they love, on purpose or by accident.

The long answer is that Eobard is a deeply disturbed individual who has never been the recipient of love, and because of that and of many extremely traumatic events (including but not limited to being brainwashed in prison, being trapped in a timeless limbo alone for years, being tortured and treated like cattle and put in sensory deprivation for ludicrous amounts of time, dying at the hands of the only person who had ever shown compassion towards him), he has a skewed perception of a lot of things and is extremely bad at emotional regulation.

Moreover, and this is something which is easy to overlook but it's actually very important, Eobard is not human. His actions are informed by his traumas, but the way he approaches pretty much everything (including his "problems" with Barry) isn't done the way a human would.

Eobard is a timeless, deathless creature which embodies one of the driving forces of reality itself (the Negative Speed Force). He lived probably more than a few hundred years considering how he keeps running around through time doing stuff, and how he keeps going back to watch past events and adjust the way he will interact with the timeline next.

He knows the huge impact that killing Nora will have on Barry, but from a moral and ethical standpoint it's not a big deal for him. Nora is less than a speck in time, an NPC who served her role for that briefest moment in which she existed. She is a big deal because she is a big deal for Barry, not because she's meaningful in any other way.

"But then he did want to hurt Barry when he killed her" Yes, absolutely he wanted to. Eobard didn't "just" kill Nora Allen - he went back in time and changed everything about Barry's life, made it so he had no friends, made him grow isolated and insecure and shy, lacking confident in his abilities. And he did it because he is very, VERY angry with Barry for one, and also because isolating Barry makes it easier for them to grow closer.

And it worked! Back in the Silver Age, when Nora and Henry were alive and not in prison, Barry couldn't be bothered with Eobard. For him Eo was just a random criminal with superspeed, and sure he was threatening because speedsters always are, but not that much of a big deal.

Now? Now Eobard is a primary element in Barry's life, a constant he's had to deal with basically since birth, someone who rewritten his entire life to make himself part of it in an indelible manner.

It worked because now Barry is more likely to fall for Eobard's manipulation, to listen to him, to just accept that he's THERE because he's always been. Near the end of Running Scared, Eobard tells him "run away with me", and Barry says yes.

Back in the Silver Age there would have been no way.

It's worth mentioning that to understand Eobard, you need to understand that everything he does, every single thing, has the end goal of being with Barry. Whether he's trying to protect him or trying to hurt him or trying to manipulate him, whether they manage to work together against a common enemy or they're on opposite sides of the fight, every single one of Eobard's actions is motivated by love (his personal, inhuman version of love).

"But if that is the case, then why doesn't he just tell Barry 'I love you'?"

Two reasons, and one is meta.

The in-story reason is that every time Eobard tried to do something good without masking it as horrible, it went sideways and backfired spectacularly - mix that with poor emotional regulation, and you have someone who's not going to be able to handle rejection and is outright scared of doing good things openly. I think if he told Barry "I love you" and Barry reacted badly it would hurt too much. Also he wants Barry to understand, and thanks to a couple of competent writers who sadly don't work on Flash anymore, we were getting there.

The meta reason is because DC is homophobic, plain and simple. Eobard DID SAY I love you many times except with words, because DC editorials won't let him. That's it. It's the same reason why Joker can't tell Batman "I love you" and has to do weird ass word plays and even more weird ass attention seeking maneuvers. They're stunted by reasons which no one but DC itself can control.

So in short. How can Eobard be in love with Barry and hurt him so much at the same time? Because he doesn't have many ways of express love, he has a hard time being caring, and every time he allows himself to be soft it backfires. Because he wants Barry to belong to him and will isolate him and make him suffer to get there. Because he's angry with Barry -- Barry hurt him too, rejected him and left him alone and refused to accept that Eobard is his lightning rod for a long time.

Eobard easily lashes out when he's hurt, and the less grounded he is the more vicious and violent he turns.

"But Zero, how can Eobard think that Barry will ever forgive him for having killed his mom?"

I don't believe Eobard was ever looking for forgiveness, but fun fact. Barry did forgive him already. Barry is not human either, and at this point I think he'd forgive Eobard just about anything, and despite how difficult everything is between them, he really wants to get to a place where they don't need to hurt each other.

The problem with this, and it's one of the reasons why they have so many issues communicating, is that Barry is in denial about many things - about being the Speed Force, about Eobard being in love with him, about how they're two constants through time and two sides of the same coin and basically can't exist without each other, about how they're each other's lightning rod.

Their relationship is very complex, absolutely not what it looks like at first glance, and it's colored by all the hurt there is between them. But again, ultimately understanding Eobard is understanding that love is what motivates him, even when he does the most horrible unhinged things.

In conclusion, have this panel from The Flash Age which is one of my favorite Flash comics, in which you can see the way these two manage to trust each other and fall into the right rhythm, despite the oceans of misunderstandings and suffering between them.

Pages from The Flash Age, by Joshua Williamson. In which Barry tells Eobard to "do the right thing", and Eobard just does it.

#thanks for asking anon #you didn't sound snarky at all no worries #I tried to be as exhaustive as possible without writing a wall of text #idk how well I managed #I just know I could talk about these two forever #my asks #eobarry #barry allen #eobard thawne #my meta

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petew21-blog · 4 months

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Angel in disguise

Misha P.O.V.

The series was coming to an end and we still couldn't believe that all of this won't happen again. Not Jensen, not Jared. I actually wanted the series to go out with a BAM. And it basically did, but me and Jensen spoke about making Dean and Castiel a couple to make the fans happy. Unfortunately in hasn't been approved. Actually they even cut some of our scenes we had together, That made me and Jensen a bit sad, but we promised each other to meet up regularly.

You might ask why, because we didn't make the same deal with Jared. Me and Jensen became some sort of a couple on set. We both had our lives at home, but when we were here, we were like... Dean and Castiel. Yeah you could say that. When we were alone together we actually called each other by our role names, which made it even hotter.

We met up in some old motel by the road. Jared got us a champagne, some candles and set up a very romantic music. We embraced each other, Jensen tore off my clothes. I didn't have to. He was already naked and ready for action. A very hot night followed just as usual. But this time felt different

I was awoken by some noise outside. I opened my eyes grogily and grabbed my shirt from the ground to put it on. I went into the bathroom to take a leak. No, not even at this moment nothing seemed weird to me. But washing hands, Jensen's hands woke me up. I was schocked and screamed a bit.

"Holy shit. I am you!" I pulled up my shirt to observe Jensen's beautiful abs I lovingly kissed just last night.

Then I heard the bed move. I turned around to see my confused face looking at me.

"Who are you?"

"Who would you think, love. Maybe look in the mirror and you'll understand."

Jensen reacted pretty similarly as I did but then we both calmed down.

"We have to find out what is happening and how to handle this situation." I said worryingly

"Hey... How about we let that go for now? We got just a few days alone for the two of us. It might not be the best way to spend our time, just worrying all the time, Misha."

"Maybe you haven't noticed, but we swapped bodies and we have no idea how to reverse this."

"Would it be that bad if we didn't? I mean. I still like you and we are still both attracted to each other. So why not use this for our benefit and just fuck our original bodies? Who can say they have ever done that, huh?"

I had to give it to him. He had an excelent point.

"Ok, maybe some free time won't hurt. Now come here, my CASTIEL"

Another inbox story: Could you maybe do a swap between Misha Collins and Jensen Ackles?

#body swap #body switch #accidental body swap #celebrity body swap

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thydungeongal · 3 months

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I'm finally starting to think of the RPG idea I started thinking of a few days ago and how to actually design it.

At this point I'm not married to any system for the game. I'm simply going to be thinking of what I want an average game session to look like, what the expected gameplay experience and emergent narrative will be, and identify what I think would make for the most interesting decision points to actively engage players with making mechanical decisions in that narrative.

Even though the genre is going to be "fantasy adventure" it's not going to be a dungeon crawler. The manga Berserk is, as always, a big inspiration for me, as it is an extremely emotionally resonant story set in a dark fantasy world. I want a game that can at least somewhat emulate the action and character arcs of Berserk with actual mechanics in place to create player incentives for playing their characters as conflicted, multi-faceted people (Keys, a mechanic borrowed from Lady Blackbird and The Shadow of Yesterday, is, heh, key to this.) and to give characters rewards for living according to their internalities (while at the same time giving incentives for changing as people, which is exactly what Keys do as a mechanic).

Anyway, once I do identify what I want to be the interesting decision points for players I do need to ask myself where I want fortune to come in or if I even want fortune to play a role. Let's be fair, though, I don't quite trust myself to design a diceless RPG as my first proper RPG design project, so it's probably best to assume that the game will have fortune in some form. While I did recently have lots of thoughts about cards in RPGs, dice are ultimately easier for me. So it's safe to assume that dice will be used.

And I can first start with a very simple principle in those decision points:

When the outcome of something (a character action, some variable in the situation, a random event) is unclear, present it as a yes/no question and roll d6. On 1-3, no. On 4-6, yes.

I've actually basically made a universal resolution system, but everything has a 50% chance of either happening or not happening. It's a good enough starting point, but for each specific situation I can ask some further questions:

Should the probability be somehow affected by a character's capabilities? To what extent?

Should the probability be affected by external circumstances?

Should the probability be affected by something in the GM's prep?

Is there something players can do to manipulate the probability?

Does this situation warrant a more finely grained spread of results than yes/no?

And once I have answered these questions I can start to look at how I want the probability to look like for that situation. Eventually I can start grouping similar situations together (for an example, if I have decided that both combat and exploration and interaction should all be affected by character capabilities I can start thinking of whether they could be all arranged under a system where a character's stats are used to alter probabilities one way or another) and turning one-off mechanics into more broadly applicable ones. And once I've done that I can start thinking in reverse, at how to extrapolate more specific mechanics out of those more broadly applicable mechanics.

This is, of course, not the only way to go about this. I could also start with a mechanic and then think of a way how that mechanic could be turned into an interesting source of narrative and conflict in game. For an example, I could start with the following Key:

Key of Guilt Your character has a guilty conscience for transgressions they have committed, either real or imagined, and it informs their every action. Gain 1 XP every time the character helps someone in a situation that reminds them of their past. Gain 3 XP every time the character's past comes back to haunt them and places them in harm's way. Gain 5 XP every time the character saves someone from the fate they inflicted on someone else. Buyoff: Your character absolves themselves of their guilt and chooses to start living again.

And think of what types of situations a character with said Key would be cool to see in and what kinds of action that situation could contain. (I'm not entirely happy with the above Key, but it's a starting point.)

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ladystoneboobs · 8 months

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[Bran, to Theon:]“But you’re Father’s ward.” [Theon, to Bran:]“And now you and your brother are my wards. [...] You’ll tell them how you’ve yielded Winterfell to me, and command them to serve and obey their new lord as they did the old.” -Bran VI, aCoK “He[Ramsay] is a great hunter,” said Wyman Manderly, “and women are his favorite prey. He strips them naked and sets them loose in the woods. They have a half day’s start before he sets out after them with hounds and horns. From time to time some wench escapes and lives to tell the tale. Most are less fortunate. When Ramsay catches them he rapes them, flays them, feeds their corpses to his dogs, and brings their skins back to the Dreadfort as trophies. If they have given him good sport, he slits their throats before he skins them. Elsewise, t’other way around.” -Davos IV, aDwD [Roose, to Theon, about Ramsay's mother:]"[...]I was hunting a fox along the Weeping Water when I chanced upon a mill and saw a young woman washing clothes in the stream. The old miller had gotten himself a new young wife, a girl not half his age. She was a tall, willowy creature, very healthy-looking. Long legs and small firm breasts, like two ripe plums. Pretty, in a common sort of way. The moment that I set eyes on her I wanted her. Such was my due. [...] This miller’s marriage had been performed without my leave or knowledge. The man had cheated me. So I had him hanged, and claimed my rights beneath the tree where he was swaying. If truth be told, the wench was hardly worth the rope. The fox escaped as well, and on our way back to the Dreadfort my favorite courser came up lame, so all in all it was a dismal day." -Reek(/Theon) III, aDwD

something something the way theon tries to rectify his childhood trauma by taking his captor's place as lord of wf and taking ned's younger sons as his "wards"/hostages, while ramsay repeatedly reenacts different versions of his own conception by hunting and raping peasant women. except theon fails in his role reversal when (unlike him in his own captivity at wf) bran and rickon escape custody. and ramsay enhances roose's "dismal day" by killing all the women he catches to prevent any more bolton bastards and further punishing those of them who fail to give him "good sport" (which his mother apparently did not give roose) while those who do satisfy him are "honored" with a quick death (and a canine namesake). and then the consequences of theon's failure to replace his captor/cold noerthern father figure include losing wf to house bolton and becoming the new "reek"/another of ramsay's dogs. (meaning he made himself ramsay's prey but gave him "good sport" in the experience)

ramsay starts out as deceptive dark trickster figure/evil adviser/devil on theon's shoulder in clash but he's also a dark mirror of theon, and a more successful one at that, not just better suited to villainy but more able to get away with his crimes. neither will ever be truly accepted by their fathers but ramsay is made heir once he's the only son while theon is rejected as such despite his better birth. ramsay profits from the alleged kinslaying of his actual brother by blood, while theon is more openly condemned (and seen as still not punished enough) for (falsely) killing stark boys who were never his actual kin. it's almost as if ramsay is an evil force who came into being to find theon and was drawn to him upon his return to the north. we first learn of the bastard of bolton's existence after theon returns to pyke and learns of his father's invasion plans, then his last hunt with the original reek just shortly precedes the ironborn attacks, all so that he's captured and waiting in wf right in time for theon's real plan to go into action, and we don't actually meet (disguised) ramsay in-person through dialogue with rodrik cassell or any other northerner but only when theon arrives as the new lord to free him from the dungeon. as the first reek may have corrupted ramsay, ramsay-as-reek corrupts theon. reek belongs to ramsay and ramsay belongs to reek.

#valyrianscrolls #asoiaf meta #asoiaf #theon greyjoy #ramsay snow #happy theon thursday!#(c)lsb #reek belongs to ramsay and ramsay belongs to reek

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traumatizedjaguar · 7 months

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MASTER-POST: Psychological Abuse Terminology

Parentification: A form of role reversal, in which a child is inappropriately given the role of meeting the emotional or physical needs of the parent or of the family’s other children. There is emotional parentification and instrumental parentification.

Intrude and Interrupt or Enmeshment: The manipulator has no respect for another person's boundaries, they will say and do whatever they please in front of, behind the back of, or towards their victims, regardless of objections or morals. If done covertly the victim will have no idea what damage has been done until it’s too late. The goal is to cut the victim off from speaking up, gaining support, or making positive changes, either for themselves or the people around them.

Infantilize: The manipulator does not acknowledge their victims maturity either emotionally or psychologically. The victim is treated as if they have no knowledge of life or experience dealing with life's challenges. The goal is to reduce a person to that of an infant or child, lowering their status in the social order, and stripping them of the ability to make choices, both in the victim's mind and the manipulator's. Abusers who successfully infantalized you and kept you behind your peers in life will then use your trauma symptoms as an excuse to say, “see you are childish and can’t do this in your own, here let me do it for you” thus continuing to treat you younger than you are and keeping you in this cycle. This keeps you in a childish state against your will, sometimes living under a rock, or not knowing things people your age should know - but this goes for all complex trauma survivors as well.

Dog whistling or Double Entendres: It can be used to set the victim up to look hysterical, it is a coded and suggestive language that only the victim will understand the true meaning of. Used to abuse the victim in a covert manner. It is a statement your abuser uses with double meaning to be able to abuse you in front of others or just play mind games with you to make you lose your mind. Abusers tend to use “double entendres” to secretly cover abusive language. (Google the definition of double entendres).

For example: with the dog whistle tactic my abuser used on me, that my abuser would tell me and other people, “I fucked a girl so hard she had an asthma attack!” My abuser gloated to everyone she knew about how she hooked up with some chick and fucked her so hard that the girl ended up having an asthma attack my abuser thought this was cool to gloat about - this didn’t actually happen; The true hidden meaning behind that statement was that she and her friends gang raped me and I woke up (from being drugged) having a panic attack and hyperventilating that someone handed me an asthma inhaler and it worked and stopped the panic attack. My abuser told me in private she was telling everyone she knew and gloating about raping me with that double entendre.

DARVO: Deny abuse allegations, Attack the victim, Reverse Victim and Offender role. The abuser pretends to be the victim of abuse while vilifying the real victim, and making them out to be the abuser.

Projection, Deflection, Denial: Projection is when the abuser accuses the victim of what they’re actually doing, this is chronically used as a part of the personality pattern of psychological abusers. If the abuser is cheating, they will accuse the victim of cheating. Deflection is when the abuser brings up things the victim “did wrong” when the victim rightfully confronts the abuser about their abusive actions or brings up something the victim supposedly did to take the blame or eyes off the abuser. Denial speaks for itself, when the abuser denies things when the victim confronts them, even when the victim has irrefutable proof.

Insinuating Comments: The manipulator knows the victim's weaknesses and buttons. They purposely push and pull on these to get a reaction. Often they will speak with double entendres or innuendos to confuse and hurt the victim simultaneously while maintaining plausible deniability of any hurtful intention. The goal is to drain the victim emotionally, wear them down, and to feed the manipulator’s ego or sense of power/control.

Feigning Innocence or Confusion: The manipulator tries to suggest that any harm done was unintentional or that they did not do something that they were accused of. The manipulator may put on a look of surprise or indignation. The manipulator may also try to play dumb by pretending he or she doesn't know what the victim is talking about or is confused about an important issue brought to their attention. The abuser may pretend to not know certain people they’re using to help abuse their victim, this is why the abuser has public friends and private contacts. The goal is to make the victim question his or her own judgment and possibly their own sanity. When others are deceived by a manipulator this way the victim feels powerless.

Triangulation

There are 4 main types of triangulation recognized. It is a situation in which one family member or friend will not communicate with the victim, or will be friendly with the victim, while turning other family members or friends against them. This can take many forms and usually incorporates gaslighting. There is always a covert element which leads to pitting the victim against others without the victim being fully aware of what is taking place. The goal is to isolate (divide), and conquer the victim while controlling their support system.

Killing Two Birds With One Stone:

To obtain control, attention or adulation, abusers will often inform their partner about a third-party such as a mutual friend or co-worker, etc., who has been flirtatious with them. This third-party person is brought into the relationship to kill two birds with one stone! First, it stirs up feelings of jealousy and insecurity in their partner and subtlety warns the partner that they’re replaceable. Instinctively the partner tries harder to please the abuser so as to not be replaced. Second, it creates an illusion of desirability and encourages rivalry, both of which fill the abuser with abuser-supply, adulation and control. So not only does the abuser get their dose of supply, they also increase the amount of power they have over their partner. Psychological abusers are obsessed with jealousy and envy to feed their insecurities and lift their self-esteem. Power is the way they go instead of looking for healthier alternatives to make themselves feel better; it’s just how they are wired. They’re wired for drama, power, control, and chaos.

Recruiting Reinforcements:

One of the ways abusers use triangulation to manipulate their partners into siding with their point of view or acquiesce to their wants and needs is by using third-party reinforcements to substantiate their opinions. This is a form of recruiting allies when taken to the extreme is a form of bullying. The abuser tries to manipulate anyone who may hold a different opinion or belief by using the help of a usually innocent third party, which of course, has only heard the abuser’s rendition of the truth.

The third-party is usually oblivious to the abuser’s ploy and believes they’re only trying to help the abuser. Usually, their party is a relative or one of the members of the abuser’s supporters that the abuser uses as a tool to help settle differences and coerce their partner or anyone else into accepting their viewpoint through the use of persuasion, embarrassment, majority rules or guilt.

Splitting:

This method of triangulation involves pitting two people against each other. The abuser does this by smearing the character of one or both of the people behind their backs. This enables the abuser to preserve their false image and ensures they’re viewed positively among the triangle. In many instances, the abuser will portray themselves as the victim, especially if they feel their partner is growing tired or aware of their manipulation, hypocrisy, and abuse. The abuser will react by planning their partner’s discard by starting a full-fledged smear campaign behind their back. So by the time they dump their partner, the abuser already has a circle of blind supporters.

The abuser will usually seek supporters that he/she knows will always agree with them no matter what. This is how they set up their partner to look like the abuser in the relationship long before the relationship is over. For this to work, the abuser must keep the supporter(s) and partner from sharing information, so the abuser will usually share mean comments each has said about the other.

The abuser uses this triangulation tactic to control the information shared between the parties providing the abuser with the power of being the primary contact person and transferer of information. Since everyone is communicating through the abuser and not with each other, the abuser can further their agenda by relaying their spin on the information between the parties.

The Pre-Discard and Dump:

When the abuser is about to break up the relationship they will confide in people who they know will agree with them and believe their rendition of the truth. Sometimes they will confide in people who hardly even know their partner, if at all. The abuser will make sure to let their partner know that they have been confiding in other people, and every single one of them agrees with the abuser. Most likely, one of the abuser’s confidants will assume the role of the replacement partner.

After the break-up, the abuser will openly brag about how happy they are with their new partner or make social media posts about it. And if their ex-partner acts jealous or tries to beg them back, the abuser will enjoy the new bonus love-triangle of their own creation. Abuser’s do this to always look good, happy, or like they’re doing their best while trying to tear you down.

Enticing the victim back or Hoovering: Is trying to use any means to get the victim to come back to the relationship. Threats, intimidation, guilt-tripping, love-bombing, enticing, making false promises of change, anything.

Blame-shifting: The victim is held responsible for the harm they suffered. The victim brought it all upon themselves and the manipulator is in no way responsible for their actions. The victim made all the choices which brought them trouble or pain regardless of how much they were manipulated into doing so. The goal is to put the victim on the defense which makes them look and feel guilty while simultaneously masking the manipulator's malicious intentions.

An abuser will blame-shift everything, even the littlest mistakes they’ve made, making themselves out to be perfect beings with no faults or flaws - obviously this disrupts the relationship and causes fights when there’s no accountability on the abusers end whatsoever.

Abuse by Proxy (or Flying Monkeys): This is when the abuser will enlist their friends or people to come after the victim and attack the victim, abuse the victim, or intimidate the victim. Abusers befriend abusers, abusers support abusers. This stage is usually after the break-up when the abuser is trying to get their “revenge” on you.

Love Bombing: Is an attempt by the manipulator to influence a person by lavish demonstrations of attention and affection. The manipulator appeals to the target’s vanity and insecurity. Their interest in the victim will be extreme once they have found their target and their “love” for the victim will be incredibly intense. Its purpose is to override the target’s critical thinking skills so that the abuser can control and manipulate. Essentially they will gain control over their victim by making their emotional state dependent on the manipulator. The abuser will act closer to you than they are given they only just met you, bomb you with loving gestures and affection which gets you easily attached (not real love).

Devaluing: This is the part of the cycle where the abuser does the complete opposite of love-bombing, they may rage, put down the victim or use any means to make the victim feel unloved. Relationships with psychological abusers are very black and white, it goes from love to hate in an instant and back again. Mental whiplash some people call it.

Gaslighting

Is a form of mental abuse in which information is twisted or spun, selectively omitted to favor the abuser, or false information is presented with the intent of making victims doubt their own memory, perception, and sanity. Typically this undermines the victims support group carried out by a combination of other tactics synthesized into a large scale attack on said victim. Making the victim deny the reality they know to be true. Often the abuser is sure of themselves and the victim since the beginning of the relationship has been in a constant state of confusion and questioning themselves. There are many types of gaslighting and ways to gaslight.

Physical Gaslighting. You see this in the 1944 movie Gaslight. The gaslighter will physically, and ever so slightly, distort your surroundings repeatedly and deny repeatedly that anything has changed. In the movie the man is slightly turning down the gas-light in their bedroom a bit dimmer and when his wife asks if the lighting has changed, he denies it and calls her crazy. He does this constantly to get the outcome he wants from his victim.

Emotional Gaslighting. This obviously uses non-physical means to gaslight the victim. Ofen making the victim believe things about themselves that aren't true, like making them out to be the abuser for example. Denying events from the past (days, weeks, years) happened a certain way that the victim remembers it happening and calling the victim crazy, delusional, mentally ill, or telling the victim they are dreaming, manipulative and making stuff up. The abuser then asserts their rendition of the truth and a lot of the time adding details that never happened and asserting that they happened.

Minimization: This is denial coupled with gaslighting. The manipulator asserts that their behavior isn't really as harmful or irresponsible as someone else may be claiming. Often times down playing the behavior by comparing it to others, "He who is without sin among you, let him be the first to throw a stone," or such logic may be present. The goal is to make a molehill out of a mountain, thus letting the manipulator continue the abusive behavior, or at least escape much of the guilt. They act like they don’t see the impact their actions have on others, sometimes they really don’t see it because they’re not reflecting on things they don’t care about.

Amplification: The manipulator will shout out your failures and whisper your successes. Any limelight the victim deserves will be diminished. Their accomplishments will go unnoticed and their shortcomings will be broadcast far and wide. The goal is to drain the victim of the energy to be successful, to make them doubt themselves, so that the manipulator can be the center of attention at all times while belittling the victim.

Emotional Blackmail: Knowing that someone close to them wants love, approval or confirmation of identity, and self-esteem, manipulators will threaten to withhold the emotional support the victim desires or needs, or even take it away altogether, making the person feel that he or she must meet the demands of the manipulator. The goal is to ensure that the victim feels afraid to cross them, obligated to give them their way, or guilty if they resist.

I’ve also seen this in terms of witchcraft/black magick in which the abuser will insist demons or gods have been used to help get revenge on the victim as a kind of deluded “divine retribution” against the victim. I’ve surprisingly heard a lot of stories of people’s abusers using black magic as a threat to their victims. This is blackmailing. All in all, wanting to do vengeful or abusive things using magic to make oneself feel more powerful is a huge red flag.

Monitor and Stalk: The manipulator is always present, lurking behind the victim's back, or from a good safe distance, keeping an eye on him or her. It is common for them to monitor the victim's computer or phone, and even use surveillance equipment in order to follow the person's every move. The goal here is simple: maintain knowledge of everything the victim says and does, their coming and going, and who they know. Check your vehicles for tracking devices, they can be under the car, behind a license plate, in the engine blending in, in the wheel well, or behind one of the tires, in the trunk, or even inside the car under the seats or under the dashboard area.

Personality Traits/Patterns

Vindictiveness: This is a disturbed personality trait that all psychological abusers possess. They are extremely revenge-prone, incredibly abusive with their revenge, and often entitled and self-righteous with their revenge. They believe they have a right to abuse the victim that they perceive as deserving of abuse. Often perceiving things in a cognitively distorted manner (research terms: cognitive distortions, distorted object relations).

Deceitfulness:

Public and Private Personas: Psychological abusers are notoriously known for having a public personality that they may show around school, their unaware friends and family, and a private personality that they unleash who they really are around other abusers or victims of theirs. Victims and other abusers are the only ones that see their private personas.

Tracfones and aliases: An alias is a fake name and identity they go by to get away with their abusive behaviors. Tracfones are also known to be used to get away with crime.

Charm: Charming behavior is used obviously to charm people and get people to like the abuser. Abusers are typically good at charming anybody they come across because it also helps hide their abusive personality.

Cognitive Distortions. A cognitive distortion is an exaggerated or irrational thought pattern. Cognitive distortions are thoughts that cause individuals to perceive reality inaccurately. Abusers rely on cognitive distortions to justify bad or aggressive behavior. One example of how they distort reality is mislabeling a person as stupid or useless because they don’t know what the abuser knows; this is a pathetic attempt for the abuser to lift their self-esteem by feeling superior to others. Another example of a cognitive distortion is mislabeling a person's identity we see this with:

Distorted Object Relations. The abuser tends to relate to others primarily as objects to satisfy their own needs and desires, rather than seeing them as unique individuals with their own feelings and perspectives.

Victim Complex. The abuser is a perpetual victim and sees themselves as victimized when they often are not being victimized. They enjoy taking on a masochistic role where they perceive themselves as being attacked or offended where there is no offense in reality, giving them ample opportunity to perceive the real victim as the bad guy so they can cause chaos and drama to fuel their abuser-supply. The cycle of abuse is called the cycle of abuse for a reason; they cannot get out of the victim role.

Pompous, Pretentious, Posers and Fake. They cannot be anything but arrogant, liars, exaggerators, making up almost everything about their character to portray themselves as a certain person, or with a certain job or degree or having certain relationships or status that they don’t actually have. We see this in a lot of famous DV cases such as “Dirty John” on Netflix which is a true story of a woman and her daughter’s DV case. We also see this with murderer, Brian Blackwell, who tried to keep his facade of a character he wasn’t up to the point where he snapped and murdered his parents, all over the fact that he was fake and needed to upkeep his perfect image to his girlfriend. Lies are a red flag. Slight exaggerations are a red flag.

Foreshadowing. This is when the abuser plays mind games or drops hints that they’re abusive (it is also a way to shift blame onto you for accepting the abuse and to gaslight you or intimidate you because they “warned you about how they are” when the relationship started.)

Crisis situations. If they have an addiction for example, which is the common one I always hear about, they’ll constantly use it to keep you smothered in their presence, there for them, ect. they will “accidentally” leave pills or a needle where they know you’ll find them so you freak out/stress and so you can be there for them. This is also a part of smothering/enmeshment. Abusers don’t know the difference between their responsibility and yours. If you’re going away on vacation, if you’re going out with friends, if you’re doing anything by yourself or with loved ones and the abuser will immediately have a crisis situation for you to come back running to them or else “you don’t care about them” because you aren’t taking care of their responsibilities.

Framing. They will frame the perfect story over the course of years or decades depending on how long you knew the abuser for. I call this simply “framing”. It’s when the abuser frames you for specific problems or for abuse from the very beginning of when the relationship first started.

Double Bind: In the manipulator's eyes the victim is damned if they do and damned if they don't. Regardless of which choice is picked the manipulator will always point out that the person should have picked the other. This may be accompanied by remarks such as "Well if you had done this I would have done something great for you, but forget about it now." The goal here is to beat the victim down psychologically and emotionally, in order to make him or her question and doubt their own intuition and judgment.

Double-Mindedness: The manipulator seeks the double advantage of being able to do wrong, of being able to have their will, of letting their passions rage, and the hypocritical advantage of seeming to be good, helpful, or supportive. In short, double-mindedness is to say one thing and do another, to do unto others what they are not willing to be done unto them. The manipulator can only accomplish said task by engaging in the self deception of doublethink.

Doublethink: To know and not to know, to be conscious of complete truthfulness while telling carefully constructed lies, to hold simultaneously two opinions which canceled out, knowing them to be contradictory and believing in both of them, to use logic against logic, to repudiate morality while laying claim to it, to forget whatever it was necessary to forget, then to draw it back into memory again at the moment when it is needed, and then promptly to forget it again, and above all, to apply the same process to the process itself.

Hurt and Rescue: A drowning person will clutch at a straw, so push them in the water, then throw them a rope. Hurting the other person does not necessarily mean physical harm and it may not even mean making them feel bad, but it does mean creating a situation that they want to resolve. The goal is to get the victim to play into the manipulator's hands so they can rush to their “rescue” only to trick the victim into trusting, believing, or becoming dependent upon them. The abuser sets up a problem, the victim is hurt, then the abuser rushes to their rescue as the hero.

Covert Aggressive Abuse: Insults are disguised as teachings, helping, giving advice, and offering solutions. The manipulator makes them appear as a sincere attempt to help, especially to others. This can also be followed by put-downs, and disappointment from the manipulator and anyone else who they have convinced of the victim's inferiority. The goal is to belittle, control, and demean the victim while covering up the appearance of wrongdoing on the manipulators behalf.

Setting up to Fail: The manipulator puts their victim in such a state of stress, or stressful situation, that failure is almost certain, wherein the outcome can be used as ammunition to discredit and blame the victim. This can be done covertly as well, using sabotage or undermining an objective that may otherwise have been achievable. This type of manipulation may be the projection of the bully's own feelings of inadequacy onto the victim.

Moving the Goalpost: When the manipulator has control of the situation they will redefine the victim's goals, in reality, to intentionally devise a way so as to assure that an athlete, for example, will ultimately never be able to finally achieve the ever shifting goals. Depending on how this is done the goal may be to humiliate the victim, keep them preoccupied so as to accomplish nothing else with their time, or to simply wear them out.

Brandishing Anger: The manipulator puts on an act of furious explosive anger, verbal abuse, or physical threats. If the victim is in a trance or has previously been manipulated by the abuser, with just one incident of such behavior the victim can become conditioned and trained to avoid upsetting, confronting or contradicting the manipulator ever again. The goal is to establish dominance or superiority, and complete and unquestionable compliance, over victims through fear.

Brainwashing: Also referred to as heart washing, is the act of changing a person's mind or heart by using extreme mental or emotional pressure or abuse. This is typically done when the victim is extremely outmatched by their manipulator either mentally, physically, economically, or socially. This can be achieved a number of ways but usually the victim is in a situation they feel they can’t escape, and will involve several tactics simultaneously. The goal is to convince the victim into believing their viewpoints about life, believing their view of certain people or a specific person, or something else and that the victim needs to be realigned to the viewpoint of the manipulator.

Silent Treatment: The manipulator refuses to communicate and uses emotional and/or physical withdrawal as punishment. This is to convey contempt and communicate that the person is not worthy of the manipulator's acknowledgement. The goal is to render the victim powerless to change the current situation and induce feelings of abandonment or rejection. If the manipulator withdraws emotionally the victim can become love starved for their affection/attention.

This is different from Gray Rock which is a technique victims in abusive relationships can use to not engage with the manipulative person in their life. You’re doing it to avoid gaslighting, fights and the feeling like you’re going off your marbles, whereas the abuser uses the silent treatment as a way to gain power and control over you, usually because they’re pissed you’re not doing what they want.

Roles in a household

Scapegoating. Manipulators subject the "whipping boy" to constant negative treatment and blame they don't deserve. Manipulators unconsciously project their own unwanted feelings and problems onto the victim. The punishment which the scapegoat has to endure is a direct projection of the manipulator's own insecurities. Scapegoating is a deliberate act of torment against another person for the cathartic pleasure of the manipulator and their cohorts. The scapegoat is often blamed for all the problems that arise, they are most likely to have DARVO used against them (they are blamed to be the abuser by one or multiple abusive family members). A lot of the times when abusive parents (or even other family members) don’t want to take accountability for their mistakes they regret or don’t want people to know about, everybody can dump their projections and insecurities onto the scapegoat.

Golden Child. This is the kid who is looked at as the perfect extension of the manipulative parent(s). They fit the role of being perfectly exploited by a parent that seeks attention, adulation, and success. This child is used for the parents' need for a perfect image. This is usually the sibling that becomes the most successful but not always. They are typically the favorite kid.

Invisible Child. Usually completely ignored. The parents (and sometimes siblings are manipulated to do the same) never speak to this kid, and may genuinely completely ignore their existence. If there are 5 members of the immediate family and it is dinner time, the parents might put down 4 plates at the table, not call them to dinner and have dinner with everybody else, just to further control and ignore the invisible child. A lot of people's situations will be different in how they experience the role. This is one example.

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emeryhiro · 7 days

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Who do you think will likely make the first move if/when Daryl and Carol get together? Is there a fantasy scenario in your head for the big confession scene?

I would be so psyched if AMC and TWD actually goes there.

Hi Anon,

Good question!! I've actually changed my mind so many times about how I think it would happen, even while writing this response. But there are a few details that I've stuck by.

I think Daryl would be the one to initiate a moment like that. And what I mean by a moment is a conversation where everything is finally put out into the open (more on this later). I also know that it would be full of hesitation and fear because, as Norman has said many times before, Daryl is inexperienced and insecure in that area. He doesn't have any "game" and isn't the type to confidently approach something like that.

However, the situations he has faced in France have put him in a position where he starts to feel that he has to initiate something like that, which he may never have been able to do on the main show. I also think that even though Daryl may initiate it, Carol would pick up on his hesitation and intentions, meet him halfway, and probably even take the lead from there.

In my mind, the moment would be full of reassurance and tenderness (both in words and actions) because they would both be overcoming so many insecurities, experiencing a moment they'd been dreaming about for over a decade, and might even be struggling to believe that they're actually in the moment and that it's actually real.

If I had to give you a visual of how I imagine the tone of the moment would play out, I'd say something along the lines of Daemon and Raeynera's confession on the beach in S1EP07 of House of the Dragon (Timestamp 19:47). Here's a part of that scene in case you can't access it through a streaming service.

This scene is full of built-up frustration, hesitation, and tenderness, which is precisely the tone that I imagine for Caryl. Some of the dialogue fits Caryl's circumstances really well as well, with perhaps the roles reversing at certain points (you just gotta ignore the parts about being a child 😅).

In order to explain what I mean a little better, I played around with some of the dialogue (below) from that scene so that it fit Carol and Daryl, and expanded on it a little bit because I think it's vital and necessary for Carol and Daryl to have a conversation like this where they're finally forced to be honest with themselves and each other before anything else can happen between them:

Carol: "I've been alone. You abandoned me."

I imagine this would be Carol confronting Daryl for leaving her behind in the commonwealth and putting his life (and ultimately her life) at risk, and possibly risking never being able to see each other again. This could also be built-up frustration from Daryl's seven years in the woods and how Carol kept asking him to return.

Daryl: "I spared you."

I think this would be Daryl starting to show Carol how he'd always felt that he wasn't good enough for her or that he could ever make her happy, so in his mind he spared her by staying away from her.

Carol: "And look at what my life became without you... Droll tragedy." Daryl: "Oh, and I wonder what you think of mine by comparison?"

This would be the moment they both finally understood that they were wrong to think the other person was better off without them and that, in the end, they'd both been living only half a life without the other.

Carol: "I know little of it..." Daryl: "Did you love him?" Carol: "We were happy enough." Daryl: "Well, that in itself is a great achievement... I am sorry."

These lines could really work for either of them. They're now finally sharing the things that were holding them back, like miscommunication and both thinking that the other was in love and happy with someone else (Carol with Ezekiel, and Daryl with Leah or even Isabelle).

~~~~

Thanks again for your question 🩵 and thank you to everyone who's been taking the time to read all my recent responses and posts. I really hope I've explained myself well here because I get so overwhelmed and excited every time I think about the possibility of Carol and Daryl finally being allowed to be together.

This has been the thing that I've wanted the most for them for over half my life, and to think that it may finally happen is a lot for me to process, so it has been really nice to be able to put some of my thoughts into words in this way.

#carol peletier #daryl dixon #the walking dead #caryl #twd #the book of carol #caryl positivity

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bitethedustfools · 8 months

Text

TWST Story Idea (4)

Actually, I have no idea what I'm doing. It was supposed to be a theory, and now it's a story idea with probably a bunch of plot holes and nonsense that I came up with at night. But do consider this idea though. It was said that there are 5 greatest mages in the world, with Malleus on the list, and Dire Crowley could probably be in it too. Who knows? How else did he become a headmaster for so long?

Fairy tales change every time they're written and told. Some parts are kept the same, some are not. Some are twisted enough to the point of being called disturbing, and others have their roles reversed, and so on.

It always changes. The words change from book to book and mouth to mouth. Sometimes because the story is a bore, or they wanted to justify the characters' actions, or maybe they simply have forgotten how it goes and made their own story up because they can never let it be forgotten.

Whatever it is, the story is made to fit one's own taste.

Dire Crowley is that kind of person who is unsatisfied with the ending of the stories he comes across. Being a curious bird, he finds it quite strange, vexing even. Why must the good guy win when they have almost nothing? The villains are cunning and stronger even, yet they are defeated by a goody-two-shoes who knows nothing of the world.

Curious, how curious. How could that happen? Logically, the villains should win. It's unfair, like the world is against them. Don't some of the villains come from the same root? So how come they are different?

Crowley wasn't having it. He wanted to know why, and he liked them enough to decide that villains should be heroes too.

And so, he made a story—a story with a certain ending in mind but a hole in between which pages will gradually be filled with time.

He made a world where 7 villains he carefully selected became the most prominent figures in Twisted Wonderland. He wrote the good things he saw in them, and gradually, people admired these figures.

He even made a place for their embodiments so he can watch over and figure out what made them lose. To do this, he made the Royal Sword Academy where the good guys are, the rivals to the villains.

Crowley intended to observe them. They are placed together in a school with 7 dorms. He wanted to see what made them different from the good guys.

It didn't take too long to figure out. Although they are thoroughly competent, they refuse to work together. Each came up with a different plan and proposed the others follow them. The others are of distinguished backgrounds and therefore are too prideful and stubborn to follow.

The story refused to move forward. It stays the same, and nothing changed. They refused to change.

Crowley is upset; this is not the kind of ending he wishes to see. Something must change to move forward, and so Crowley tweaks the story a little bit and begins another story with a twist.

The first Alice, Yuu, gets called over. Yuu is the anomaly in this story. The villains are characters that can't change too much, or else they lack their own identity—the "you are what makes you," if you will. They have to be the same yet different. So Yuu will be the catalyst to move the story forward, the wheels to the cart, and the cogs to the machine.

This Yuu was to be a middleman, smooth things over and let them work together. He was a person of low birth who somehow became a noble. He knew the hardship, and he knew how to connect with people.

The story ended too shortly, sadly. Yuu died. Someone with ill intention killed him, and the others are too indifferent to his death.

Crowley thought that yes, this must be it. This is what sets villains apart from the heroes. It's because they don't care about a single life, and if they do, it is because they lost a good person that benefited them a lot.

Was it because the heroes were kind and good that people would help them? Surely that must be the explanation; otherwise, Snow White wouldn't be able to escape and live due to the hunter and the dwarves, nor would Belle be spared by the beast. Princess Aurora wouldn't wake up if the fairies didn't seek help from Prince Charming.

Because the villains were selfish and indifferent, people don't like them and won't lend a hand. This wouldn't do. Crowley wanted them to be heroes; he wanted to paint the ugly black heart into pure white snow.

The ink dropped on a blank page, and a new story started once again.

Second Alice comes, and Yuu is her name. She is gentle, kind, and her heart is filled with empathy, and she is also willing to voice out her concern. This is good, Crowley thought. This will teach them how to feel, and they also have a rough childhood.

Surely if they are touched by her open heart and kindness, they are willing to change, be kind in return, willing to work together for the same goal.

He watched in interest; they appeared to be enamored with Yuu, who is like a little butterfly fluttering about, only for those wings to rip apart.

"Oh, why are they so cruel?" Crowley lamented. Instead of taking care of it, they'd rather have the wings torn apart. They could not stand the butterfly landing on someone's hands even for a moment.

Crowley called forth another Alice just as the story starts. Again and again and again. He will write the story as many times as he can until the story is to his satisfaction.

He exhausted his magic, and the villains are still doomed to fail by their own flaws and unlucky things. Yuu can only do so much before everything falls apart.

And then the ink splotches on the half-written story, and Overblot came to life. He could not erase their existence. The ink forever stained the pages. Crowley could only roll with it even as new anomalies dubbed Overblot began to pop up. The story hasn't ended yet, and he will only start anew if it stopped.

It was a rather unusual thing to say, but it is the farthest chapters that Crowley has been through. They were nearing the end in every new story with every Alice/Yuu changed.

He lost count of how many Alice/Yuu he has lost and how many villains that slowly changed their way lose their lives to these monsters. No doubt that the perfect story is about to be achieved. The greatest happy ending that the villains deserved is waiting just this close, with a monster blocking the way.

Ink began to drop from his face, dripping onto the already stained book. Crowley too is also nearing his end. His magic is already depleted from using his unique magic and fetching Yuu every time a story starts.

A new story is about to begin, and Crowley stood in front of the Dark Mirror with a white mask. The mask also had ink on it, telling him that the Dark Mirror too had used up their power to summon Yuu.

The next one has to be someone who could survive to the end. Someone who could befriend the villains and show them kindness and recognition they deserved. Someone that can change their ways and improve their perspective of the world no matter how little. Someone to be there by their side until everything.

He reached out to the person whose visage formed on the mirror, urging the person on the other side to take his hand.

"For thee, guided by the Mirror of Darkness,

Follow thy heart and take the hand of the one reflected in the mirror.

Flames that turn even stars into ashes,

Ice that imprisons even time,

Great tree that swallows even the sky,

Don't be afraid of the power of darkness,

Come now, show your power.

Mine, theirs, and yours,

There's only a little time left for us.

Do not let go of that hand, at all costs."

Who would have thought that the new Alice who will guide them all to the perfect ending will be a magicless human who is quite troublesome and reckless in nature?

Every Yuu is different. They are summoned from different world/dimension/time to help aid his story (to influence). All of them have magic. Crowley doubted the last Alice/Yuu (from the game. Depends.) will be the last key to open the final door since they are magicless.

Fits for yandere theme as well. This Yuu is very valuable and the key to happiness. Of course they want Yuu to stay here. Of course Crowley wouldn't let them go.

#disney twst #twst wonderland #twst #twisted wonderland #twst yuu #writing prompt #twst crowley #dire crowley #everyone loves yuu #yandere twisted wonderland #yandere twst

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