#and it was so fucking good i wish i had the artistic capability to make it

[duckiemimi]

If I was gege i would just be a pussy and resuscitate gojo, the peer pressure must be crazy 😭 n u know what? gege is innocent in my eyes, i forgive him, im gonna put all the blame on his editors for how the story turned out, they could never make me hate u gege

given how gigantic the fandom's become? fuck yea! i was expecting a twist like that! i wrote a post about this a while back, about how i had a feeling his heart wasn't in it anymore and that the pressure from all parties started getting to him, and the way some reacted to that was...confirmation. then gege came out with his experience in SJ, and well, that was the big picture alright.

i have a lot of empathy for creators that go into the industry only to be swindled of their ideas. the pursuit of excess money is what kills dreams, i think, and i wish gege could've had the opportunity to nurture his original story. but! that doesn't mean i won't give credit where credit is due, good or bad! after all, the gege who wrote shibuya also wrote shinjuku showdown. it's just that now we have a better idea on how to contextualize the writing choices he went for. jjk is still his story despite!

i hope this whole experience doesn't deter him from creating art, though. an artist will be an artist forever, so i hope one day he shares more with us because even with his flaws and circumstances, he's shown that he's capable of writing beautifully. it doesn't have to be from jump or any other mainstream publication! it just has to be him. yea!

[zeledonia]

alright ill not torment that artist's post with extended musings about ew! shinryu so here goes, i have some… thoughts?? about shinryu in ultima thule and about zenos' presence there and… all of that.

I thought Shinryu was really neat in Stormblood. The whole concept of this primal born from the rage and despair of a nation that was conquered and destroyed and plundered, and then having said primal also be subjugated by the conqueror. The cruelty of how even the manifestation of Ilberd's sacrifice was stolen to be used at the whim of the enemy. How slaying the primal at the end of StB allowed us to symbolically lay Ilberd's despair to rest - freeing Ala Mhigo in the same breath as freeing his legacy from the clutches of the empire.

And there's something to be said about how Shinryu was born from Nidhogg's eye - yet another character doomed through his bottomless rage at his loss. And how we use Omega to hunt the primal down - an omicron, conquerors and destroyers of the Dragonstar.

It was one of the parts of Stormblood that worked for me, and I wasn't fundamentally opposed to the idea itself that Zenos draws upon Shinryu's power once more in Endwalker, but… idk, I feel like I am interpreting more into it than the narrative ever intended me to?

I feel like there's a lot you could read into the scene, and how it delivers proof that Zenos is hitting a fundamental limit to his character. But when i look at the way the game plays the scene out, it feels like I'm just too generous about it idk.

So like. Zenos spends most of EW chasing after the WoL and trying to get them to fight him again, blatantly admitting that he is trying to cause you as much rage and despair as possible, because he believes this to be the way to unlock your full potential against him.

He says it on several occasions. Tells you during the dinner that the final days are a gift to you. Tells you on the moon that he intends to see you consumed with hatred and despair.

And of course, during the aftermath of Alisaie's scolding when he's ruminating in the menagerie, he supposedly realizes that he's been going about this all the wrong way. Both his motivations for seeking you out, and his methods. So he appears to you in the Ultimatum, as Shinryu, and claims he's got it sorted out now.

But does he?? At the end of the universe, he tracks you down in the shape of a primal born from despair - a primal he effectively stole from his enemy-, born of feelings that never belonged to him in the first place. A feat he was only capable of by stealing the Echo from Krile, because Hydaelyn's blessing was never his to begin with either. And of course, he gets to this point by consuming what remains of Hydaelyn's aether, too. And then he fights you as a Reaper, and in post-EW we find out that even this power was stolen - Zero tells you she had no choice. She tells you (if your character unlocked Reaper) that your pact with your avatar is equal, but hers with Zenos was not.

Zenos never had the ability to reach Ultima Thule through his own merits, he still fell short of achieving what the Warrior of Light achieved. Where we make it to Meteion's nest by understanding despair, and overcoming it through hope that was created by understanding, such a path would have been barred to Zenos.

I was kind of disappointed that our dialogue options upon his arrival were just variations of "lol I won't save you", when really i wish the game had let me acknowledge how fucking wild it is that Zenos shows up in the despair realm, dressed up as the rage and despair primal, looks at the WoL and goes "lmao are you gonna fall to despair???".

I think it says a LOT about his character. He's had a good long thinking session about his issues, and made a commendable effort. But he still doesn't grasp the nature of despair, positions himself (and wants to position the WoL) as someone who cannot be affected by "such a banal thing", and… well, he dies.

The Warrior of Light understands despair and has the power to turn it into hope, and it saves the world and shows Meteion that it isn't the end. But it is the end for Zenos, because ultimately he doesn't understand how to create hope. He has harnessed a collection of powers he fundamentally does not understand, used them to speedrun the road to Ultima Thule, brute forced his way into the Ultimatum, and never walked the path that gave the WoL the strength to make it out of this ordeal alive. But the way it plays out ingame, it feels. Too triumphant? It's practically his big moment - he shows up to save the day in his own way, he's your reliable flying platform for the whole fight, and…. I don't know what I expected, but it feels like the game simply does not address a single implication of his choice to take Shinryu's shape again.

Maybe what I was missing was something, a tiny thing, during the battle? There's a moment in the battle where the WoL falters, and the scions are giving us strength. But I wish Zenos had faltered, too. I wish there had been a consequence, however brief, to him harnessing the power of a primal he never had a true connection with.

In the same way he got punished in Stormblood for stealing the Echo (by being brought back to life), I wish he'd gotten punished for using Shinryu, too. Maybe I would have liked it if the scions had saved us JUST in time because despair-driven Shinryu could not withstand the Endsinger's attacks any longer. What if we fell? What if Zenos' mockery of the Endsinger as "weak prey" was punished, and he found out that he does not have what it takes to conquer despair, because he was so detached from the majority of human emotion.

I feel like there's something missing from Shinryu's appearance in Endwalker that ties it back into what happened during Stormblood - Zenos forcibly taking control of this massively powerful primal, but losing.

I think if we'd gotten something, anything acknowledging how at the end of the road, he had still not managed to bring anything of his own to the table, I think it would have been such a good demonstration of why he died that day, and why we did not have the chance to save him.

Something about how he forged an empty existence for himself, and all his stolen power was indeed a sad, sad mirror to the strength the WoL gains from their genuine bonds with their friends, who lend it to the Warrior willingly. (Also something something limit break happening because it's the battle with you, the only person he does have a genuine connection with that he can draw true power from.) (Okay yeah that bit is very self indulgent)

[jonathan-samuel-smith]

I think that Jon likes Naruto and Dami is just writing a shoujo is the funniest thing ever

Like Dami would look at shonen and "yep, my parents are fucked up too" or "based" (he also like shonen but he's not too fanboy over it) because he life is a mess, he family have a lot of problems (the all are a bunch of crazy people, they all love each other but still...)

And then he just opens a shoujo because "oh I wish my life was simple like that" and Jon is just "... do you want to talk about it Dami?" "Yeah They're finally holding hands" and Jon is just very worried about this bat

Dami likes shoujo and slice of life stories make so much sense, he really likes these domestic life stories where nothing bad happened

DC has the opportunity to put the more edge Dami possible after Alfred and Ra's dead but here we have Dami, hugs his cow and reads things as Kimi ni Todoke, Skip and Loafer, Say I love you and stuff

I also believe Dami would love Vinland Saga (former child soldier gives up of violence and starts a farm) and things like that

(in the start Jon was happy because he had something to share with Dami, but now he just worries)

Idk I just want to share this though with someone

Absolutely!

Jon reads shounen because he likes stories where what's bad is obvious to nearly everyone and they can actually do something about it. He likes the teamwork and friendship because he's lonely. He likes the excitement because he's from a small town. And then it becomes something familiar, a friend to him. I don't think Jon just likes it because Ninjas are cool, I think he probably sees it as a microcosm of society and human behavior, to some extent.

Jon likes the idea of being brave and facing things head on. Damian knows that some things it's better to just walk away from.

Shoujo is his way of studying human behavior, it's the kind of interaction he's never been party to and it's the perfect escapism for one that lives such a dramatic life. I think he and Jon watched The Devil is a Part Timer together when it aired. Jon loved the brief action sequences but Damian adored the love story and the once-villain now getting to live an every day life and be content. He probably related to the main character. I think Jon loves wholesome moments so he was pretty happy with it.

I think Damian starts reading slice of life Yuri because he relates to the gayness of it but comphets himself into thinking it's because he likes girls. But you can take or leave that headcanon.

I think part of why Damian likes Jon so much is because he's so sturdy and dependable and Damian craves stability whereas Jon loves the vitality and vibrancy of Damian, who is capable of bringing out his best and his worst, who shows him new and exciting things, but who is ultimately there for him when he needs comfort even though he never thought to ask for it. Jon is ordinary and stable like a shoujo manga and Damian is exciting and cool like a shounen manga.

I really love the idea of Damian trying his hand at being a mangaka/manga artist and he's writing shoujo and he shows it to people and they're like "why is the male love interest like Jon and the female love interest like you?" And he screams at them and goes to change it but he can't bring himself to change it too much because he likes it as it is.

He goes "Damn it. I don't care what they say, this is just good writing. I'm finishing it like this."

When he shows it to Jon, he finds himself uncharacteristically nervous for some "unknowable reason".Jon fawns over it and asks Damian to draw him a poster of the main girl because he thinks she's so cute, and he wants to hang it up in his room and look at it every day. Meanwhile the girl literally looks like Damian with makeup and a sailor fuku.

He briefly becomes obsessed with Damian's oc and draws fan art and infodumps to him about headcanons and they're all things that Damian cut out about her that made her more like him and Jon's talking about how she's so cute and he would love to date her. Damian's thinking "I wish I was a girl. Then I could date Jon and we would be so happy. But I'm not so I'll just move on with my life I guess." (This is not an egg Dami moment in my story but if you'd want to write trans Dami here go for it)

Then later Jon comes out as bisexual (the poster is still up in his room next to his bi flag but he's not obsessed anymore) and Damian literally cheers out loud and Jon's like "oh my friend is happy for me!" And Damian is having gay panic "WHY AM I SO ELATED ABOUT THIS?!" and he realizes he's in love with Jon, and now he's embarrassed that his brothers were right and he was writing about Jon.

--

One day Damian starts a conversation:

"So, Jon. Do you remember Suzuki Amaya from my manga I wrote in 8th grade?"

"Yeah! I love her." Damian's heart skips a beat. "Remember when she almost killed that guy who tried to mug Hishiro? Hishiro didn't even need the help but he was just turning into goo over her saving him and so was I! I mean it's really sweet in a fucked up kind of way, you know?"

"I..." Damian pauses to clear his throat. "I wrote that story about us, without ever really intending to... because when I think of slice of life I think of it as warm and comforting and domestic, and when I think of home... I think of you. It's always been you."

"Oh thank Rao I'm not the only one who thought Amaya was just like you. She always acted so cute and seeing her happy just made me so happy too. I wanted to be Hishiro and make you happy like he did for her but... I mean... I didn't know-- you like guys, right? This is a confession?" Jon asked, looking for confirmation.

Damian scoffed. "Yes, you idiot. I like you. How else do you want me to say it?"

Jon released the tension in his body language. "Any way is fine as long as you're the one saying it. You know I like you better than Suzuki, right? Cause she's not you. You're you. And you're... amazing. Really, Dami, I mean it. I love everything about you. Even the things I dislike about you I like, because I associate them with you. You're my morning star. My guiding light, you--"

Damian talks through a smirk. "Your son-of-two-writers is showing. I love you too."

Jon smiles. "Can I kiss you?"

Damian had been sitting perched on the backrest of the couch and he clambers down to sit next to Jon, their knees brushing. Damian nervously balls his fists up in his lap. "I've never done this before. Can you give me a moment?"

Jon nods. "I guess my secret's out, now. You know that when I said all that embarrassingly mushy stuff about Suzuki I was really talking about you... I was such a cringe pre-teen. Oh Rao, I kissed the poster on her cheeks when I was pining after you... look at you getting red, you're so--" Jon is cut off by Damian knocking his teeth into Jon's in a botched attempt at a kiss.

Jon lovingly places his hand over Damian's cheek and uses it to guide their faces to slot together nicely as they share their real first kiss. It's closed mouth, warm, soft, they can feel short soft stubble where their faces meet. Damian remembers to close his eyes and just feel. He forgets that he doesn't even know what to do with his hands. He forgets all the worries he had about Jon rejecting him and their friendship ending. They break away.

"I think I'm going to have enough material for a second book." Damian tells Jon.

---

So there's my minific, I think I'll come back and polish it up later. I hope I did your idea justice! Thanks for the ask! Come back anytime.

[7grandmel]

Todays rip: 26/01/2024

​THIS RIP WAS MADE BY TEETH GANG

Season 3 Featured on: The SiIvaGunner Spooktacular Halloween Horror Special Collection '17​-​'19

Ripped by UUN4 Visuals by KnightOfGames, "Teeth Gang"

Look, uh, feel free to skip the visuals on this one if you're sensitive. There's a lot of, teeth, in this one.

I really don't know how I was able to forget about ​THIS RIP WAS MADE BY TEETH GANG for so many years, when I specifically recall being there on the channel the day it went up. It might just've been due to Halloween 2018 being a rather understated and not very memorable event in general, mainly there to tease the next year's Halloween blowout of Spooktacular III - a by contrast amazing event that I covered briefly in Battle with Jeffinite. Yet the music to Gimmick! was on my mind for some unknown reason as of late, and one YouTube search later, I'd rejoined the Teeth Gang.

The SiIvaGunner channel is pretty inextricably tied to the Chiptune community, right down to where several members of the team almost exclusively make chiptune rips. As a result, the channel's rips have featured a good number of games that neither you or I may find particularly nostalgic or even good, but that are beloved by chiptune artists for their lovely sound - Viva La Robocop and Beautiful! ~ Curveball of Sean Kingston come to mind as two examples of this that I've covered on the blog. The NES game Gimmick! is somewhat of a special case, though, thanks to its develope Sunsoft. Despite not having all too many games under their belt that could be considered genuine classics, Sunsoft is still remembered by a lot of gaming enthusiasts specifically for how they made consoles like the NES/Famicom and Sega Genesis positively sing. Gimmick!, released late into the Famicom's life, is the perfect embodiment of that, celebrated in some ways as the de-facto game to showcase just what the NES is capable of doing (Follin soundtracks notwithstanding).

That's the backstory for why I was out looking for rips of the game, anyway - as for the reason why TEETH got involved to result in ​THIS RIP WAS MADE BY TEETH GANG, that's an area I was woefully undereducated on. It's likely that many of those reading this had the chance to grow up more closely attached to Nickelodeon's cartoon programming of the early 2000s, and by extension had some truly iconic bangers embedded into your minds. I'm again speaking as an outsider, but - good LORD, discovering that My Shiny Teeth And Me had over 20 million views on YouTube left me completely flabbergasted. Do you remember just two days ago in Guilty Eyes Creeper where I discussed just how many rabbitholes there are to fall into on SiIvaGunner? Yeah, this is a prime example of me doing just that, as recently as this week.

Because yeah - even though I first saw THIS RIP WAS MADE BY TEETH GANG, my lack of familiarity with the song made me not really care for the rip's audio (which was also because the visuals were, naturally, a lot more memorable for the wrong reasons). Five years later, I can officially confirm that My Shiny Teeth And Me is a fucking BANGER that I wish I'd given a chance sooner, partially carried by the vocalist being a member of 2000s boy band NSYNC, but also just the melody and progression being very catchy in general! And when arranged through the aforementioned beautiful Sunsoft-y sound of Gimmick, it's a perfect fit - the sugary pop cheer of My Shiny Teeth And Me fits the sound of Gimmick, and Happy Birthday in particular, like an absolute glove. The main melody, bassline, percussion - though its all playing within the limitations of the original Famicom track, it still manages to sound just as full of life as the song its arranging.

And look, I've been throwing shade toward the choice of giving the rip visuals, but I'll say it - I think even back then I found it pretty fucking funny. Learning in hindsight that "TEETH GANG" is actually just members of the SiIva team submitting their own teeth edits for the rip, ballooning the size of contributors to this otherwise simple rip, just makes things even funnier. THIS RIP WAS MADE BY TEETH GANG was indeed made by teeth gang, and through the simple combination of the three different rabbitholes its made up of that I chose to explore, its now become a rip I'll never be able to forget.

[gourdkeeper]

This is a fic I wrote for @nippydippy after they came up with the idea of "what if Jamie sent the reader thirsty and needy videos of him teasing and playing with himself to rile them up while they're away.

Afab Reader x Jamie 📸📸📸 (NSFW)

Word count: 4112

Content warnings: 18+, afab reader, well established relationship between the two, living together, jamie takes nudes and lewd videos, sex tape (?), come eating, dirty talking, name calling, possible blackmailling kink, anal, pegging, masturbation, hair pulling

It was hard to leave the bed this morning let alone the house. Jamie kept hugging you and peppering kisses on your skin but sadly you had responsibilities and you wanted to stay cordial. They weren't big saving the world type of tasks but regardless, it had to be done.

You had to grab groceries and Luke, your old friend and coach asked you for help to teach his class today, he needed a capable fighter to demonstrate techniques on and he knew he could rely on you.

The thought of you being touched by Luke in any sort of way had Jamie roll his eyes and sigh. Ugh, why can't you just skip out and stay in bed with him, he thinks. It'd be so much more fun, for the both of you.

Sadly for him, nothing could be done about it. You had already gotten dressed and pecked a quick kiss on his forehead and are ready to be on your way.

He just wishes he could do anything to keep you with him. And most definitely away from his rival that you just had to become close friends with. "Unfair." He mutters and pouts as he turns on the bed, dragging the bed sheets around, pinned underneath his weight. All he can think of is you. Your touch, his fingertips brushing over your skin, his mouth on your neck, his grip on your waist as you beg for him to fill you up...or maybe the other way around. Things would never get boring. Except, that idiot Sullivan gets to be with you. He gets to touch you, toss you around, put you on a chokehold just to show off to his students. It fills him with rage. But also, with lust. The idea of someone else holding you and doing as they please, but at the end of the day you come back to him because no one's a match for the great Jamie Siu. He gets to do that to you and so much more... If only it could happen right now.

He's lost in thought, mourning the fact that he can't have you on top of him until you come back home.

He notices he's leaking. Cock straining against the bed sheets, he had started rutting against them unconsciously, craving for you.

Normally he wouldn't act on his urges, even being pent up he'd rather wait and have you take care of his needs. But this time... This time is different, he knows who you're with. He knows he can make you crave for him just as badly as he craves for you in front of your idiot coach and you'll be away from home, getting teased, pent up and wanting him the entire time you're away from him.

He reaches for his phone and opens the camera app.

Jamie ponders for a second. Wondering if this would be a good idea. "Fuck it."

He uncovers himself just a bit. Bedsheets draping over him artistically like that of a marble statue from distant times. Outline of his cock very much in frame, his neck stretched and hand over his chest.

*Click*

He turns around, putting his ass up as high as he possibly could and shoves his head down, half peeking at the camera, mouth agape and lidded needy eyes.

*Click*

He goes over to the edge of the bed, kneeling, legs spread apart, camera pointed at the mirror, tightening his abs and flexing, his hand wrapped around his hair, pulling on it while looking vulnerable and fully exposed.

*Click*

His hand shakes with anticipation. Sending nudes feels bold even for him. He opens the messaging app and selects your contact.

With zero context, Jamie selects his pictures and hits the send button. Now he waits.

---

You're just about finished with the lesson, you notice your phone vibrating from the bench and you walk over to it, unlocking it.

"Message from Jamie huh? Bet he misses me-"

Your mouth goes agape, not a single sound produced.

You whip your head around to see if no one can see your phone.

"What the hell..." You mouth, cheeks turning bright red and feeling your blood rush to your nether regions.

How is this man so fucking hot? This should be illegal.

You start typing.

"Jamie holy shit." Send.

"You know others could have seen this right?" Send.

"You're so fucking hot, just you wait until I get home." Send.

Holy crap dude, he sure knows how to push your buttons.

You see the icon change as he read the messages and starts typing to you.

"Yeah? Let them see it then, they'll just be jealous of what they can't have. Come home then. Punish me."

"Oh so that's how he wants to play is it?" You think to yourself. Smile forming on your lips just as you hear a familiar voice from behind you making you jolt, turn and hide your phone behind your back.

"What got you so happy all of a sudden?"

"Oh Luke! Oh uhhh nothing really!"

He isn't buying it, he looks at you with one eyebrow raised for a second or two and then laughs and pats you in the shoulder.

"It's alright, keep your secrets then." What a nerd. "Listen, the class is over, you can go on about your day and uhm," he clears his throat, "say hi to Jamie for me will you?"

You freeze as he walks off.

"Oh my god did he catch a glimpse?" You hope he was just being friendly, regardless. Your phone buzzed again and you rushed over to the bathroom to take a look in privacy.

Your notification read:

"Jamie sent a message, 1 video attached."

"A vi...a video?"

You hesitantly put your phone's volume on at the lowest volume and listen closely while you open the file.

"Holy fuck."

He's laying on the bed sprawled out, hair a mess, sweaty, flushed cheeks and chest. Masturbating. Moaning your name. "Please... I miss you so much... I need you... Please punish me... Ruin me..." His head thrown back, body tensed as if he'd been holding his orgasm in for awhile now. Either he's a really good actor or you're gonna need to hurry up if you don't want him to blow the entirety of his loads all on his own.

You feel yourself getting wet. You want him so badly. You need to put him in his place, you need to kiss him and call him dirty names, and scratch him, and ride him and-

You hurry out of the bathroom, gather your things, say bye to everyone with a wave and a smile and rush out the door. You need to get back home right this instant. The groceries can wait for the day after.

---

Jamie's heart is pounding so hard it's like it'll pop out of his chest any moment. He never recorded himself before. He's watching the video playback again, "Goddamn I look good" he exclaims as if to hype himself up. He was acting it up, he's not that close to an orgasm. Yet. But it was so much fun wondering what your reaction would be.

Much to his dismay, the video has been marked as read but you haven't replied and you've been offline since... "Hmmm maybe I broke them... I should do it again."

Jamie tries his best to prop up his phone horizontally on the nightstand against the lamp. The angle is perfect. The light rays shining through the blinds illuminating him, he lays with one leg lifted up.

"Yeah that should work..."

He reaches up to hit the capture button again and immediately lays back down before it begins recording.

Leg still up, giving a perfect view, his face peeking out from behind his arm, covering his eyes which are tightly shut. Whimpering. His other arm reaching down, trailing down his thigh, moving past his sex and going over to his hole, playing with it lightly, he starts whining and quivering.

Biting his hand now as he gently inserts one finger. "Please fill my hole up... Please... Use me" he moans as he bucks his hips so that the finger slips in further.

"Please make me your slut~"

He only notices you've arrived when he looked back at the camera and sees you standing by the doorway, frozen.

He withdrew his finger as he jolted up.

"I thought you'd be gone longer!"

You grin as you drop your bag at the doorway and step in slowly.

"You thought so, didn't you? What do you think you're doing Jamie?"

His already flushed face turned into a tomato. Kneeling on the bed he tries to find words.

"I don't know what you mean..!"

"No?" You pull your phone out and open a picture to put up right against his face. "What are these then?"

He gains a smug smirk on his face, "Did you like them? Did you crave me so badly you came running right away?"

You decide to just give him hell, with a sparkle on your eye you take a fist of his hair and pull him to you abruptly.

He cries out in pleasure as you yank him over to you. Your other hand reaching his lenght and immediately taking hold of it and start jerking it.

"I think it's better I show you how much I like them instead of saying it." You smile mischiveously at him, his face contorted and body tensed as he does nothing to stop your ministrations. "What were you pleading for again? Punish me? Use me? Ruin me? Don't worry, I will... I'll make sure to drain you dry, and when you're all spent I'll ride that pretty face of yours and come all over it." Your grip on him tightening and applying more pressure, talking dirty to him, planting the idea on his mind that you intend on using him the entire day.

You firm a knee on the bed against his balls keeping his legs spread open and lean to the crook of his neck to lick it.

He moans loudly. Making no effort to muffle it or stop himself, just lost in the moment.

You lick him again. And again. Your lips meet his skin and kiss it before opening your mouth to bite him and sucking in. That's sure to leave a mark. He's whimpering and his body rock hard, back arching and toes curling.

"I- m'gonna c- ah-!"

"You're gonna cum already? Beg for it."

You don't stop or slow down, you just want to hear the whines and moans escape his lips as he tries to put words together when his brain is a mushy mess already from just one handjob.

A stream of "please's" exit his mouth, he can't think of much else to say. His eyes and lips shut tight as his body begins to convulse.

You slow down just for a small instant as he sprays his seed all over his torso.

"Good boy..." Your hand letting go of his swollen cock to sweep up his come into your fingers.

You bring them to his mouth and snake them past his lips, leaving a mess on his chin.

His face twists for a second as he has a taste but his neediness speaks louder than his initial disgust and complies. Licking around your digits and sucking them in.

"You're such a good slut for me Jamie..."

You start moving your fingers in and out as he moans around them, letting go of his hair and moving to his chest instead, alternating between groping him and playing with his nipple.

"We're just getting started..."

His eyes are heavy and full of lust. His forehead and body sweaty with his silky hair sticking to it. You just wish this beautiful image of him could be immortalised beyond your memory. And then, it strikes you. The phone's camera is still on.

"Weren't you recording yourself again when I got here?"

"...!" His eyes go wide and he tries to get up.

Your hand on his chest pushes him back down instantly.

"You're not turning that thing off." Your voice low, your mouth crooked into a smile, tongue licking over your lips. "It's gonna keep running. I'll make sure to ruin you in front of it." You come to whisper in his ear again. "The great Jamie Siu getting ruined on camera... And don't even think of deleting that. Imagine if anyone saw it... The legendary peacekeeper? In such a vulnerable position? Being a needy slut? Begging to be used?"

Your words burrowing into his brain, finding a fantasy he didn't know he had. His cock once more growing and hardening and his cheeks flushed bright red with your fingers still deep inside his mouth.

His breath grows shallow. If you didn't know any better you'd say he could come again just from your dirty talking. "Maybe I should fuck that pretty asshole of yours next."

His eyes go wide again, if he could blush any harder he would have.

You withdraw your fingers with a pop of his lips and step off the bed to grab something from the drawer.

"Don't even dare thinking of leaving that same spot."

He wouldn't. His head is spinning, he can't believe you actually came home to punish and destroy him. His wish came true and he couldn't be any happier with the result. Maybe he should tease you over the phone more often if it leads to sex like this.

He knew what you were capable of, you've put him in his place more than once, but this pent up version of you isn't something he sees as often. The way you handle him rougher, talk dirty to him with more venom, make him beg and do as you please with him. It drives him insane in every single good way.

You come back, strap put on with the harness and a bottle of lube in hands. "Missed me?" A smirk on your face.

He lets his head roll to the side to see you.

"You're not taking your clothes off?" He's almost pouting.

"Wasn't it supposed to be a punishment? You'll have to be a good boy and earn that."

His cock twitches.

You scoop up the left over come that was on his abdomen and smear it on the dildo as he watches intently with his lips parted.

"Get over here." You hook your hands under his armpits and drag him to the edge of the mattress head hanging off the bed, checking with the camera to see if it's all in frame. Perfect.

You take his wrists, crossing them and pin them to his pelvis with one hand.

Your other hand, free, takes hold of the rubber dick and slap it lightly on his cheek.

"Open up slut."

He obliges, nervous, it's not the first time you've had him give a blowjob, but the position is definitely new for him.

"Good boy." You slip it in, head first so he can adjust himself and feel comfortable. You gently pull in and out. With each thrust going a bit further. Muffled moans around the dildo as he does his best to take it.

Normally he would have gagged on it already but he hasn't realized that you've shoved it fully in already. The position making it easier to take in, you praise him.

"You're such a good slut for me. Balls deep into your throat and your cock is still leaking. You should take a look at yourself. Good boy."

The mental image could honestly tip him over but he holds on strong. Letting you fuck his mouth and getting more pent up and closer with each thrust of yours.

"If anyone saw how much of a cocksleeve you are I'd have to fight for you. All those stupid street thugs would want to whore you out and pass you around as their toy."

He can't even understand where you keep getting these ideas from or how you know exactly how to push his buttons but it just works. His legs moving erratically, stretching and freezing in place and his feet gripping onto the bedsheets. His drool running down his cheeks as you speed up. You know he's close, making you proud that you know how to drive him there so well.

"Aw? Is my slut going to come for me again? Not yet."

You pull out, connected to his lips by a long and thick string of saliva. A whine exits his mouth.

You let go of his wrists and wipe off the excess drool on his face.

"You know that second picture you sent me? With your ass up?"

He nods.

"Take that position."

Jamie rolls around and crawls over to point his ass at you and you smack it hard making him yelp out.

"Where are you going?"

"D-doing what you told me?"

"I want your face here. Pointed at the camera."

"...! Oh-" somehow he didn't expect that. "I'm sorry-"

"You will be." You say with a wink and friendly smile on your face.

It makes him shiver. He loves you so much, it drives him completely wild how you can turn him into putty in your hands like no one else could ever.

He assumes position and you circle around, getting on the bed on your knees behind him. Taking the lube bottle and spreading some on his entrance, fingertip slightly slipping in as you lube him up.

You start with two fingers. Making sure he's relaxed but he's tensed up.

You press your other hand on his lower back, lowering it just a bit.

"Take a deep breath baby."

He does as told and his muscles relax.

"Good boy." You slip them both in, effortlessly. To be fair he was already working himself up when you arrived.

You immediately find his sweet spot like it was muscle memory and make him moan and hide his face on the bed.

"Stop hiding." You grab his hair to pull up and then shove his head back down sideways, only just partially covered by the bedsheet. "I want everyone to see your pretty face while I drill you. Want it to be loud and clear that I'm fucking Jamie Siu, protector of Chinatown like a cheap whore. You understand?"

"Yeah-" he moans out.

"Who are you?" As you pump your fingers in, striking his prostate every time.

"J-Jah- Jamie Siu!"

"Good boy. And what are you?"

"Ah...!" You've hit the spot once more making him see stars. "I'm a pe- peacekeeper..."

Your free hand strikes down on his ass.

"What are you right now?"

"Your slut!“ he cries out.

You remove the fingers and start rubbing the strap on on his taint. Poking at his balls and dragging up to his butthole.

"Good boy. And what do you want?"

"I want you to fuck me. Please!" He tries to look away and hide his face again.

*Smack*

One more slap on his ass cheeks.

"Face up slut."

He struggles to remain composed in any way shape or form. His brain stuggles to hold onto any thoughts, all he wants is to get pounded by you right now. His hips rutting backwards against you on instinct.

"Beg." you bark as you rub against him once more.

"Please! Please just shove it in!"

He's desperate. He needs you to fill him up and fuck him the way he deserves.

You press the tip against the entrace.

"Fuck- yes! Please!"

"Tsk, so needy."

You hold onto his waist for extra grip and insert yourself in, slowly.

His mouth forming into an O, his eyebrows knit together, one eye shut tight and the other admiring the view from the camera.

You bottom out, "That's my good boy." You stay there for a second and reach around for his cock.

He jolts and moans, not expecting the sudden touch.

"Oh my god-" he mutters under his breath.

You smirk, you love the control you have over him.

"How badly do you want me to fuck you? Hm?"

"So bad! Please, I'll do anything, just fuck me, please!"

Who are you to deny such a heartfelt plea? You grip his waist and pull out about halfway and slowly dip it in again. Angling yourself to hit his special spot. Slowly you pull out, your hand starts moving. Just as slow. And in. You're not gentle with your thrusting but you're being oh so slow. You know it drives him wild.

His greedy bottom rocking trying to get you to go faster.

"Pleaseeee~"

He mewls out, needy and vulgar. Jamie's eagerness and need for you never fails to inflate your ego.

"Do you want me to fuck you hard?"

"Yes!“

"And fast?“

"Yes- please!"

"You sure you can handle it big boy?"

"I can take it, please fuck my brains o-"

He doesn't have time to finish the sentence before you hold onto him hard and start pouding into his ass. Hand on his cock trying to keep up.

A myriad of moans escaping his lips. Eyes completely unfocused, hair a mess, drool dripping down onto the bedsheet. Hands gripping the bed capable of tearing it open.

"You... You take me so well Jamie..." Taking short and shallow breaths yourself, getting weary from the fast pace and brunt force you're fucking him at.

His cock is pulsing in your hand and his legs are trembling, just about to give out when you pull out leaving him feeling empty and gasping for air.

You grab him by his legs and flip him around. You want to see his pretty face when you make him come again.

You waste no time and enter him again, his face contorting from the sudden intrusion.

"Jerk yourself off for me. Good boy."

Both his hands at work, one cupping his balls and the other trying to match your pace the best it could.

You hold his legs up and press down, his lower back angled up. His head whipped back, fully visible to both you and the camera. Your dildo entering him and thrusting hard and fast. Faster. Harder. Your breath synchronized, his moans filling the room together with your grunts.

"I- I need to-"

"Come. Empty yourself for me."

He sees white and it happens in an instant. Ropes of seed shot up. Some hitting his face. Most of it pooling in his torso once more.

"That's right."

You keep fucking him until you're certain he's fully drained and then slow down. Still thrusting but at a much more bearable pace, almost gentle.

His legs continue to tremble in your hold. He ain't going anywhere after this, you'd be surprised if he could stand up right now.

You exit him and let go to grab his phone.

"You look so cute, all fucked out like a dirty slut~"

A smile flashes on his face for a second.

You flip the camera orientation and point it at him, covered in his own filth.

"Hey Jamie... Look here..."

He pries his eyes open, to look up at you...and the camera, confused.

You reach with your hand to his come once more, scooping the most of it.

"Open up... Stick your tongue out for me..."

He does as told, his with eyebrows furrowed and looking up at you as if begging for mercy.

You smear it onto his tongue.

"Clean it all up boy."

He does his best effort to lap it all up and leave your fingers spotless. Licking all over and sucking them in.

"What do you have to tell me for that?"

"T-thank you..."

You click the stop button. Perfect.

You put the phone aside and run your other hand through his hair.

"You did so well for me pretty boy... That's what you get for teasing me..."

"Still...still want to please you."

"Hm?" You look at him puzzled. How does he still have any energy after all that?

"You said you'd ride my face until you come all over me...please, let me please you..."

"Baby you don't have to, you must be exhausted..."

"I want it. Don't make me get on top of you after this." He snarls a little at the end. He is tired. A lot. But he's more than capable of flipping this whole situation on you if you don't grant him his wish and let him eat you out. On the bottom or on top, Jamie Siu always gets what he wants.

You unbuckle the strap's harness and your pants, letting them fall to the ground. Your shirt tossed aside immediately afterwards.

This is going to be a long day.

[morgana-ren]

What do you think Asatrion was like before he was turned? Much different?

Also kinda unrelated but Cazador supposedly taught his spawn to be all seductive etc. Like really?? Cazador did?? Have u met him?? It was Astarion for sure. I think he was always a playful teasing whore and Cazador ruined it like everythong else and made him teach the other spawn. Because cazador being seductive and teaching it to Astarion?? I know we only really get a glimpse of him in game but I can't imagine it!

Ultimately, we do not know. We don't have much of an idea of who he was before, or why, or where, or how. We do not know his family life, his thoughts, or his feelings. It is never mentioned, and I'm sure that's deliberate in a sense. He doesn't remember. It isn't pertinent to his story. It is who he is now that matters. But it is fun to speculate.

People have different ideas about what he was like, and all are valid. All are fair. Some are more likely than others, but at the end of the day, we do not know.

I went into a deep whiny post about that a few days ago about what I think he was like. But that's my idea with my experience, and I might ultimately be wrong.

I do not think that Cazador 'taught' them to be seductive. He expected. He grabbed people he knew had the capability. The charisma. The beauty. He grabbed those who already had the capability. He took them and he said "Bring to me or you will be punished." And after a few times of being punished, they fucking learned. That's how survival works.

Cazador had a type of person he took. Astarion was one of the ones to define it because he was attractive and charismatic. But relying solely on Astarion, who is described as 'defiant and bratty' a multitude of times to 'train' your other spawn probably isn't a good idea. It's a recipe for failure.

I suppose it's entirely possible that Cazador had Astarion try, but if you've ever tried to teach someone something like this, you would know why that's likely not a huge possibility.

The art of seduction isn't something easily taught. You pick it up through interacting with people and being very good at reading them. By having confidence and being desirable. By, in ways, being manipulative and using their own weaknesses against them. It is a game, and you don't start out even knowing the rules most times. 'Teaching' it is hard. It is why pickup artists and those ridiculous 'teachers' almost always fail. They can teach you tricks, but it is you and you interact with people that defines failure or success-- along with the other person. You need to do it to people who are open, and that is the trick: Knowing who is open to it. What they like. Who is vulnerable and who is a waste of time. And he did it professionally.

It's entirely possible Astarion was flirtatious beforehand. I do not think he was a sex god like he had to become under Cazador, but he was an attractive young man. I'm sure he had dalliances. Or maybe he didn't. Maybe he was too busy focusing on other things. I don't think Cazador instrumented his downfall. I don't think he necessarily 'watched' him enough to know that Astarion was good. I think he was a good judge of character and knew he would be adept at learning and already had the tools to succeed.

Ultimately, many of these details are deliberately left to our imaginations. Larian has faith in their players and leaves it to you to deduce. There is also the matter of respecting Astarion and should he ever wish to tell you these things, he might. But that's not something people like us like to talk about to people we don't know or care about. You'd have to earn that privileged information. It's not important to his story, so it is not given to us.

He would have to want to talk about it for you to truly know.

I don't think I would ever call him a whore, given his backstory, however. It's something that might cause more damage than make a point. Especially when he didn't want any of it.

[zer0psd]

never used photoshop so im curious to see your opinions about photopea vs photoshop

ok things to be known: 1) adobe can suck my cock and balls theyre evil and i wish that the corporate entity that is adobe would go up in flames, a corporation shoud NOT have that much insight in your privacy, files, sensitive info, etc 2) photopea is great and built off a small dev team as a basically a passion project, which is awesomesauce! i'm not knocking them at all, and i think ppl should support them in anyway they can

i've been a graphic designer and photographer for years now, and in hs i became adobe certified. i literally spent four years of my life learning on an industry standard. it becomes muscle memory after a while. beside that i was a roleplayer so i became VERY familiar with edits and gifs and all that. again everything became muscle memory. adobe suites are the industry standard for a reason, and for GOOD reason. i think they have an amazing interface and work hard to update the experience and make shit easier for artists; like i will give them that even if i sound like a bootlicker. i never paid for it tho lol as a student i got it for free and i would use cracks/torrents.

when i got my new computer it wouldn't let me run bootcamp so i couldn't crack the adobe suites like i used to :/ new mac processors or whatever don't rely on intel anymore, so not intel = no bootcamp. most cracks are pc based so i just couldn't find one that worked for me. apple went ham on protecting IP and combating torrents so it's like impossible to crack without an extensive VPN or else adobe will literally send a cease and desist to your internet provider. its sincerely fucked up.

i switched to photopea bc of this. i really liked it, but im autistic so having to relearn my own workflow that ive had for years made me want to hashtag die. the interface is VERY close to photoshop, so it wasn't hard, but it doesn't have the same capabilities i was used to w ps. i do NOT like edited photos in photopea; i think its way too laggy and glitchy to work with giant raw files, which really sucks!!! for making small edits and doing my graphic design tho??? i do really like it. it doesn't have the same capabilities as ps sure, but once i just fucked with the filter galleries and different plug ins and worked my process around what photopea could accomplish, i was good as gold. i've been producing quality work on commission through photopea. it's a learning curve for sure, especially if you have zero experience with an editing interface like that, but the more i use it the more i learn.

all of that being said, i think photopea is fucking awesome for being completely free and open source. it has its issues —— sometimes its way too glitchy for me and pisses me the fuck off, i have to frequently save my psd files and hope that they don't fuck up, and then reopen so it's less laggy and rinse and repeat bc some of my stuff takes hours lmfao —— but i think its pretty darn close to the photoshop i was using like less than a year ago. its glitchy, its laggy, the ads are annoying and clog up the screen, but i simply cannot complain to much when its a smallish dev team working on a shoestring budget (last time i checked) and for FREE. like its open and usable on any browser and computer and i think thats rad.

if i could go back to ps without giving them money i would in a heartbeat. ps is awesome for the work i do, and i like that there's constant improvements and updates. it just boils down to look, feel, and workflow to me; ps is rarely laggy and glitchy, its meant to handle giant projects, there's so many plug ins you can find online, etc. i just wish it wasn't a subscription based software; honestly if i new adobe was less like the elf on the shelf and i could make a one time purchase, i would. but alas.

anyways i'm pro photopea all the way. idk if any of this was helpful its mostly rambly lmfao. but yeah. i don't do much photography anymore, so i don't have to work around the glitches and lags and all of that with photopea; i focus on graphic design for event fliers and social media content + rp resources. it has room for improvement for sure for sure, but it's lovely and helpful in its own way.

[beautifulpersonpeach]

Indigo is so fucking good. Every song is so impeccably made? The production is worthy of a Grammy nomination, the caliber of collaborating artists begs highlighting again, the album's cohesiveness is seamless. Plus the performances? You know what, scratch what I said. RM didn't meet my expectations, he exceeded them. Like, Indigo is objectively one of the best albums released this year and Hobi's Jack in the Box was nothing to sneeze at either, but Indigo is far more polished.

I've not posted lately, partly because I've been having way too much fun with the Namjoon mania right now. I mean yes it hurts Jin enlisted, but I think we had more than enough time to prepare for something that is really only up for him to experience. And I trust he'll be fine because he's a very capable person. I wish him good luck and health the entire time he serves and afterwards, same as I wish for all the guys. And that video of them sending him off was the absolute sweetest thing. Really.

*

Back to Indigo. Have y'all watched the RM Live in Seoul @ Rolling Hall?

*

Some weeks ago I'd talked about wanting to attend, but unfortunately I couldn't go. So you can imagine how happy I was when BigHit posted the recording. This live performance video is again, so well made. RM created such a compelling and intimate experience that it translates perfectly on camera.

I watched the whole vid in one sitting. Then went to do other things, had friends come over given previous plans, cooked and baked with them, and then we ate everything we cooked watching the Indigo live together (me for the second time that day). There were 8 of us and 5 knew next to nothing about RM (2 of the 5 had "heard of BTS somewhere").

All of us were his bitches by the time the performance was done. One of them ordered Joon's album afterwards.

And the featuring artists who performed? Seeing Paul Blanco pull off those runs live is a must. And I think it's really cool that the artists were able to comfortably interact with ARMYs.

I love his voice. His vocals the entire time was strong, steady, smooth. And let's be honest, a lot of times it's not any of those things. But in this performance Joon is in his element. He's prepared. The material he's working with is almost flawless and its the sort only his genius can produce. When I told y'all that with my background this album makes me feel seen with how tastefully it fuses Black and Korean influences, I meant it. And while I know that other k-pop albums this year have also been incredible at this (Minho's Chase is a recent example), I think it means something more that Joon actually wrote this music. Yes he worked with a team, but everything about Indigo, every song on it, is his invention. And that's so hot.

It's difficult to rank the songs because they each suit very different moods equally well. Right now: Closer, Still Life, Lonely, Change Pt 2, Forg_tful, All Day, Yun, and the bridge of Wild Flower are favourites..

*

(Namjoon has the prettiest eyes in BTS)

*

I love that this album served as the inspiration for Joon to create more music.

(Translation credit: @/MoonieJoonieee and consider reading the entire interview linked here)

It reminds me of his conversation with Pharrell earlier this year.

All in all, I am so happy for Joon and I feel proud of him. He did so well with this album.

[tjemegames]

WuWa: Free 5-star Selection, Beginner’s Choice Convene, & More Jiyan Attempts

The last few days have been eventful. I made my selector decision and got in few nice ten pulls on the Beginners Choice and Jiyan convenes. Let’s take a look, shall we?

Free 5-star Selection

The Giveback Custom Convene selector came in clutch (we love compensation rewards in this household). Before utilizing it I had already pulled both Verina and Calcharo so making my decision was much easier than I expected:

I adore Jianxin’s personality; she’s disciplined, righteous, and a dedicated martial artist. I really like her design, her battle animations are solid, and her play style is pretty straightforward as well. She’s been great for exploring the over-world due to her shielding, self healing, and buffing capabilities for her teammates. Overall, not a bad choice for early game (I play for enjoyment > meta so take everything I say with a grain of salt). Not sure how great she’ll be in endgame content since she does require a good bit of field time to get all of her buffs in order, but I’ve loved playing with her so far and she’ll likely be a staple in my echo farming team for a long time coming.

Beginner’s Choice Convene

With 3/5 of the standard 5* characters already in my clutches, I had a very important decision to make. Obviously Encore would’ve been a great choice since I didn’t yet have any Havoc coverage, however, I was knee deep in Lingyang’s companion quest at this point in time and I simply could not ignore my heart on this one.

So I set my path for the little Lion Dancer and continued grinding out gameplay for more standard pulls; I got a solid triple multi right before my boy danced his way into my roster at 41 pity:

Lingyang is such a sweetheart; fiercely loyal, caring, and lovable through and through. His companion quest sold me on him almost immediately, having the opportunity to play with him during the process only solidified my decision. He’s so very fun to play with. Implementing his Lion Dance background into his battle animations was such a good call on the Dev’s part. The animations are really smooth and satisfying to work with. Unfortunately, he’s not as strong as the other standard dps units but I find him to be the most entertaining to use (so far) and I have no regrets about choosing him for my guarantee.

Jiyan Convenes

I made a last ditch attempt at Jiyan before ultimately deciding to call it quits on him and start saving my astrites for next patch:

A nice triple multi followed by a sad singular one. 90 total convenes thrown toward bringing the General home is a good effort and necessary stopping point.

At present, WuWa just doesn’t give out enough premium currency for me to justify putting everything I have into the first limited character. There’s too much uncertainty and I really don’t know enough about this game to “fuck it we ball” my way through it like I have been in HSR. It’s probably better for me to keep my guarantee on the back burner while I study up on the intricacies of this game.

I don’t plan on scooping up Yinlin so I should have a good chunk of time to hoard astrites before inevitably going for the next character. Hopefully my next attempt is kinder to me than this one has been.

That’s all on WuWa for now. It’ll probably be a while before my next update on this game (unless I get lucky on standard banner) so have fun out there and good luck on your pulls!

Now, back to our regularly scheduled HSR yapping. Boothill pulls are today — wish me luck!

[mickgaydolenz]

i was tagged by @birdie-hop (thank you birdie <3!!!) to do a fun new tag game where you list your favourite musicians and (if you want) explain why you like them so much!

so i feel kind of like a bit of an outsider when it comes to music because i tend to be super particular and i don't actually like a lot of musical artists beyond a song or two. there are a lot of little things that tend to put me off of songs or artists, so when i find one i like i tend to latch on to them with everything i've got. this is going to get really long winded because i have a lot to say about one of these artists in particular (Bowie duh), so fucking feel free to just ignore this!

The Beatles -> let me start with my biggest cringefail flop moment of my whole life. i had sworn to never like this group, i used to make fun of my friends who enjoyed them, and then like the biggest hypocritical asshole of all time i watched the stupid fucking get back documentary and have not recovered since. other than being bewitched by their faggotry and crazy internal dynamics, i genuinely really love their music (that was so painful to type...). i think what i appreciate most is something about their music feels both timeless and yet beyond its time??? and the sheer level of musicianship in their works is mind boggling (like holy fuck not to jerk off paul or anything, but watching him pull that song out of his head in -3 seconds in get back rocked my world). they also just genuinely seem to be having fun (until they weren't) and it comes across in their music. as people they fucking suck ngl, but also that's part of the charm (not john lennon though he has issues i can't see beyond so sorry dude dni on sight buddy) because it just shows that they aren't these giga brain geniuses that are beyond mortal comprehension.

Ryuichi Sakamoto -> not going to lie i got into him by way of watching Merry Christmas Mr. Lawrence, so that will always add a level of endearment to him as an artist for me. vocally, he isn't the strongest performer, but there is something charming about the sincerity in which he delivers his lines that i appreciate. i love how sakamoto sculps sound, he's so insanely good at cultivating atmosphere especially in his instrumental pieces. the mcml soundtrack is a great example of what he's capable of, and considering he'd never scored a movie prior to that is just insane. his dedication to experimentation and genre hoping is also super admirable, i love that he has experimental sound work but also classical pieces but also 80's poppy numbers. i really appreciate how he incorporates cultural instruments and melodies into his work, modifying them in a way that both retains their significance while allowing room for change. actually here is one of my favourite pieces by him if you want to check it out -> compute, compute, compute

Micky Dolenz -> and like i suppose this also includes the monkees in general, but specifically she is EVERYTHING TO ME!!!! vocally i'm slain every time he opens his mouth, like what a fucking voice and it just keeps going strong. i know every one says this, but micky is truly one of the most underrated vocalists, he deserves so much more recognition for his talent than he has received. also, as a songwriter??? FUCKING WOW!!!! i WISH to GOD he had written more songs, because man oh man the ones he wrote for the monkees are just banger after banger. i think micky's intelligence as a song writer is super insane, his ability to spin a narrative while also handling intense topics all wrapped up in a soft voice that belays the seriousness of the song???? uhm yeah give me more bitch, love that shit. also micky just seems so chill and so kind. not to mention modest; the guy is too modest for his own good, babygirl please you deserve so much more okay??? all in all he seems like the friend that would take you out and get you fucked up beyond belief, but then he'd make you some coffee in the morning, y'know?

David Bowie -> okay, okay, okay, fuck, um he literally means too much to me to even begin to put into coherent words. i've never connected more with a body of work than i have with his music. every facet of his songs -the style, the lyrics, the themes, the sound- speak to me on a visceral level. i still get literal goosebumps listening to certain songs, it's insane how much emotion they inspire in me. he is also the only musical artist where i've listen to his complete discography AND enjoyed most all of it (you don't even understand how HUGE this is for me). As an artist, Bowie is simply unmatched to me; he pushed himself constantly, reinvented himself constantly, tried constantly for his art. that mindset, the desire to push and try new things and not stagnate in the preciousness of your own ego, is something i've tried so hard to incorporate into my own practices. beyond just the music and his art, as a person i've never related more to someone (the good and the bad). so much of my personality has been ripped from and formed by him (that should be embarrassing, and it kind of is, but his mask of confidence and poise has served me soooooo fucking well). Bowie always saw himself as an observer, removed from people, living on the outside looking in on the world and its workings. whether it was a perceived alienation, or a real alienation, or a combination of both, he always felt other. and man oh man if that isn't just the most persistent feeling in my life. anyways to make a long gay story short this dude rules my world and just writing this has me tearing the fuck up <3

okay now that that is done i tag @reignoerme, @sunny-lie-melody, @squeesbysophie, @vintagecocacolainthesun, and @jathis (but only if you want to man!)

[positivelybeastly]

🖤

attractiveness:

repulsive / hideous / ugly / not attractive / unappealing / not unattractive / meh / no preference / ok / mildly attractive / nice looking / cute / adorable / attractive / pleasant on the eyes / good looking / hot / sexy / beautiful / gorgeous / hot damn / would tap that / perfect / godlike / holy fuck there are no words.

Keeping in mind that this is very much being written with teenage Hank in mind, since the age gap would otherwise make this rather a skeevy proposition. But, with that in mind, Doreen's a cutie, honestly! And teen Hank has a lot less hang ups when it comes to romance, so I could honestly see him just asking her out for coffee or the like.

personality:

grating / irritating / frustrating / boring / confusing at best / awkward / unreasonable / psychotic / disturbing / interesting / engaging / affectionate / aggressive / ambitious / anxious / artistic / bad tempered / bossy / charismatic / appealing / unappealing / creative / courageous / dependable / unreliable / unpredictable / predictable / devious / dim / extroverted / introverted / egotistical / gregarious / fabulous / impulsive / intelligent / sympathetic / talkative / up beat / peaceful / calming / badass / flexible.

Teen Hank is kind of a square, if I'm honest, but he's also very receptive to being told he's being a square and lightening up, so I feel like someone as forthright and assertive as Doreen would get him out of the library and into some fun. It doesn't hurt that she's just as much, if not more, of a capable superhero as he is at this point in their respective lives, so he doesn't have to worry about that particular drama bullet point like he's had to with other potential partners.

how likely they would have sex with them:

not if they were the last person on earth and the world was ending / fuck no! / never / no way / not likely / not sure / indifferent / I’m asexual / maybe / probably / it depends / fairly likely / likely / yeah sure / yes / would tap that / hell yes / fuck yes! / wishing that could happen right now / as many times as possible / we are already having sex.

Hank is very much not the type of person to just jump in bed with someone (that doesn't come until he joins the Avengers, natch), but in my personal headcanon, he's got at least some experience in this area, so, if she's receptive, then sure, why not? Granted, it'll be extremely awkward when/if older Hank gets those memories, but that's what you get for fucking with time.

level of friendship:

never in a million years / worst of enemies / enemies / rivals / indifferent / neutral / acquaintance / friendly toward each other / casual friends / friends / good friends / best friends / fuck buddies / bosom buddies / practically the same person / would die for them / true friends / my only friend.

I can see them hitting it off, honestly! Hank needs someone who can pull him out of the lab or his books, and Doreen could probably do with someone to ground her and be a slightly more level head, which this version of Hank especially is.

first impression of them:

i hate them so much / i don’t like them / i don’t trust them / they annoy me / they’re weird / I’m indifferent / meh / they seem alright / they’re growing on me / truce / I think I like them / I like them / I’m not sure if I trust them / I trust them / they’re cool / they’re genuine / I think we’re going to get along / I really like them / I think I’m in love / oh fuck they’re hot / I love them.

Doreen's the kind of girl who makes a good, strong first impression, let's be real here - I can definitely see Hank thinking she's got a strange way about her, especially once the squirrels make themselves known, but he's seen stranger. He's friends with Bobby Drake and Scott Summers, after all. :P

current impression of them:

i hate them so much / i don’t like them / i don’t trust them / they annoy me / they’re weird / I’m indifferent / meh / they seem alright / they’re growing on me / truce / I think I like them / I like them / I’m not sure if I trust them / I trust them / they’re cool / they’re genuine / I think we’re going to get along / I really like them / I think I’m in love / oh fuck they’re hot / I love them.

Haven't met yet, owing to us not having capitalised on that thread I've promised you just yet (my fault, apologies on that, I just got absolutely inundated with requests for this meme, I'm gonna have like 20 full ones filled out by the time I'm done), but I can definitely see them vibing.

[very-sleepy-head]

Not So Secret Crush

The first time Mickey sees Ian's Instagram profile he almost faints out of shock. Fuck, isn't he too young to die of a heart attack?

Or, Mickey accidently likes Ian post from 32 weeks ago. Panic ensues.

✨ Read on Ao3 ✨

……………………………………………………………………………….

Fuck fuck fucking fuck.

The first time Mickey sees Ian's Instagram profile he almost faints out of shock. Fuck, isn't he too young to die of a heart attack?

He knew Ian had no problem being shirtless. Fuck he doesn't think Ian is even capable of fucking with a shirt on. So he really shouldn't be that surprised he posted a picture with his sibling in their backyard pool, all shirtless and wet and hot- Fuck.

Mickey, get your fucking shit together.

He kept scrolling, he observed every picture. Some are silly pictures with his siblings, some are 'artistic' ones like fucking Christ Ian posting a picture of his army boots in the snow, some with Mandy. But there's one of Ian that made his heart beat faster. It doesn't even make sense. He's not even shirtless or wet or sweaty. He's just looking straight into the camara and Mickey thought he might die.

Only that can explain why he almost dropped his phone, tried to catch it quickly while in the prosses accidently liked the post.

Fuck.

Mickey may or may not have liked an Instagram post that was made by his cru- Ian. The real problem is that the picture was posted 32 weeks ago.

Fuck. Fuck! Fuuuuuck! Mickey was so fucking done if he finds out. He'd never hear the end of this. Can he just unlike the picture? He should but would that just make him a coward? No. It doesn't matter. He should definitely unlike it, before someone sees this.

Ping!

Mickey dropped his phone. Okay deep breath Milkovich. Just fucking look.

Ian_Gallagherrr has followed you

That's it. Mickey is never leaving this house again. Never.

Ping!

Fuck that. Mickey is going to move away from here, create a new identity. Mexico sounds like a great fucking idea right now.

Ian_Gallagherrr has sent you a message

He stared at his phone for good minute. His head was spinning and he knew he'll have to face this sooner or later, so he had to stop being a little bitch about it and just read the message. Worst case? Mexico is still an option.

Ian_Gallagherrr: Hey Mick (:

Mickey dropped his phone like it was made of burning lava.

How the fucking hell is he so casual after he like a picture from a million years ago???? Well maybe he didn't notice it was an old picture? Mickey should pretend it never happened and maybe it'll go away. Good plan.

MickeyM_F_U: hi

Cool. cool. cool. cool. cool.

Ian_Gallagherrr: Sooooo you like what you saw?

This fucking guy, who thinks it's ok to act so fucking casual with Mickey. Oh think the fuck again bitch.

He took another look at the picture he liked.

How could anyone not like it, right?

MickeyM_F_U: fuck u gallagher.

Ian_Gallagherrr: You know I rather fuck you 🍑

Fuck. Mickey was totally fucked.

MickeyM_F_U: shit man u cant say shit like tht

Ian_Gallagherrr: So tell me, why did you like the picture?

MickeyM_F_U: accident

Ian_Gallagherrr: Hmmm

Ian_Gallagherrr: So you don't think I'm hot?

Mickey was officially dead. If you see him in Mexico, not you didn't.

MickeyM_F_U: fuck u is what i think

Ian_Gallagherrr: Well

Ian_Gallagherrr: I think you're incredibly hot Mickey

Ian_Gallagherrr: I kinda wish you'd post pictures of yourself on insta too

Ian_Gallagherrr: But I'm cool with being the only one who sees your hot body

Speechless. Mickey is speechless. Sure he knows Ian likes talking, he literally never shuts up, but he never says shit like that to mickey's face. He knows better, he knows mickey would react. But now, through messages, mickey can't shut him up.

Ian_Gallagherrr: I miss your body

MickeyM_F_U: come and get it

Mickey is possessed, that's the only explanation to why he sent that text. Is he flirting with Ian?

Mickey waited for a reply, bouncing his leg.

Ian_Gallagherrr: At work ):

Ian_Gallagherrr: Can't wait to fuck you hard once I'm done

This is so... new. different.

MickeyM_F_U: oh yea?

Really Mickey? he thinks to himself that's the best you could come up with?

Ian_Gallagherrr sent you a picture

Ian_Gallagherrr: Look what has your body is doing to me

Mickey tapped the picture and his mouth fell open. It's clearly a semi in Ian's pants. Now mickey was getting hard.

MickeyM_F_U: when ur off work?

Ian_Gallagherrr: 2 hours

Ian_Gallagherrr: Meet me there?

2 hours. Okay Mickey could wait to hours to have his dose of muscular arms, strong legs and incredible dick.

2 more hours he told himself no problem he took a deep breath. maybe he could start by himself-

Ian_Gallagherrr: Mickey.

Ian_Gallagherrr: Wait for me.

FUCK. Ian knows him too well.

MickeyM_F_U: yeah yeah see u there gallager

Ian_Gallagherrr: See you soon Mick😉

Fuck fuck fucking fuck.

[licncourt]

top 5 moments of louis characterization

or

top 5 pieces of vc fanon

Honestly, I'm at the point where I hardly know what's canon and what's fanon because AR lore is so wild, so I'm taking option one for my own sanity.

The lead-up to Paul's death! What we find out about mortal Loui really encapsulates the clash between the moral pillar Louis aspires to be (and believes himself to be in some cases, whether he'd admit it or not) and the reality of his selfishness. He's a spoiled brat who has the privilege to sit around and contemplate his adherence to Aristotelian Christian morals while his lifestyle is made possible by pure exploitation. It tells you everything you need to know about Louis and how his moral compass, how it's all theory and no practice. That carries over directly to vampirism in so many fascinating ways.

THE PRIEST SCENE. I think that's really the first time we see what Louis is capable of when he loses it entirely. Feeding on Claudia was a lapse in control, but the priest scene was a concentrated descent into madness, like a microcosm of his issues around desire and control and guilt. He goes from a quiet, pious young man to a bloodthirsty monster over the course of a few paragraphs. It's so chilling and so revealing, Louis as he wants to be and then Louis at his worst (which is also what he thinks he really is). Truly masterful and one of my favorite scenes from VC as a whole.

His stupid little Aesthetics monologue. Literally what the fuck is this Lewis. What a fuckhead.

"But why…you’ve said Lestat shouldn’t have made you start with people. Did you mean…do you mean for you it was an aesthetic choice, not a moral one?"

"Had you asked me then, I would have told you it was aesthetic, that I wished to understand death in stages. That the death of an animal yielded such pleasure and experience to me that I had only begun to understand it, and wished to save the experience of human death for my mature understanding. But it was moral. Because all aesthetic decisions are moral, really."

"I don’t understand,” said the boy. “I thought aesthetic decisions could be completely immoral. What about the cliché of the artist who leaves his wife and children so he can paint? Or Nero playing the harp while Rome burned?”

"Both were moral decisions. Both served a higher good, in the mind of the artist. The conflict lies between the morals of the artist and the morals of society, not between aesthetics and morality. But often this isn’t understood; and here comes the waste, the tragedy. An artist, stealing paints from a store, for example, imagines himself to have made an inevitable but immoral decision, and then he sees himself as fallen from grace; what follows is despair and petty irresponsibility, as if morality were a great glass world which can be utterly shattered by one act. But this was not my great concern then. I did not know these things then. I believed I killed animals for aesthetic reasons only, and I hedged against the great moral question of whether or not by my very nature I was damned."

4. The flower picking and stargazing and singing!! It's an adorable passage, but it also encapsulates what makes Louis so endearing. No matter what happens, he never loses his reverence for the wonder of being alive, the inherent optimism and love that keeps him going through everything and the unexpected whimsy that makes you so aware of why he winds hearts like he does. It's so little but so much. I talk a lot of shit about Louis, but God. He's a cutie pie. Baby.

5. The Prince Lestat epilogue, my beloved. It may be the bare minimum from Anne, but my little guy is HAPPY. He is forgiving himself and finding peace and it makes his arc feel worth it. I'm SO glad AR let him have this after so much suffering. It's so lovely and so needed.

+ Honorable mention to him standing in the rain and watching Romeo and Juliet (1996) through the storefront window. It serves functionally the same purpose as no. 4, but it is so.

[1eos]

I’ve been good at not looking at certain ppls tweeters and been mostly avoiding the current arguing but sometimes I still go back if she appears somehow, to solidify my hate of weird girl. I really wish more ppl saw her weirdness and not in as she would say the cute way, shes just straight up wrong, it really feels like she thinks shes some sort of leo spokesperson, she needs to expand her fucking vocabulary from baby and cute. Like yes we can think he’s cute but the way she does it feels so.. ick? wish I could think of another way to describe the feeling

no i get what you mean on all fronts😭😭😭 i only award myself occasional hate searches bc i don't wanna keep feeding my intense dislike of people. and i can't even say i hate weird girl like i hate ppl i've had true beef with she just makes me veryyyyyyyyyyyyy uncomfortable LMAO. and i've realized when it comes to kpop specific weirdness it's not so much what they say but what they DON'T say. like ive followed at least a couple hundred kpoppies in my time and quite a handful of leonites and they acknowledge that he's cute but also that he's talented, weird, annoyingly eats ppls food out the fridge etc but for her it ALL just comes back to how tiny cute n sweet leo is. even tho he is fucking huge and capable of other things other than just being sweet 😭 like u can tell when ppl like that don't really see someone else as totally human? it's a super subtle thing but you pick up on it

and in general it's just a red flag when someone doesn't talk abt music or performances. i have mutuals that log on and everyday talk abt a favorite song of an artist and act like they'll die if they don't bring up how good the music is but with that whole group you would think leo's just a gay socialite LMAOOOOO bc there's more focus going into how he must be giving pussy to every man he knows than the insane slayage he does on every stage. i think abt leo's running slide into the arms of his victim in elisabeth daily. meanwhile i will wake up on a random sunday and the kleonites are all bringing up leo eating the gr8u note live and start retweeting 300 videos abt it. there's just a difference!!!!!!

[the-technorats]

3, 5, and 7 for the writing asks :)

!! thanks for the question!! :D

What is your writing ritual and why is it cursed?

man, i feel like i don't have a good answer for these first two but i'll yap about it anyway. i think maybe because i'm still learning and figuring myself out as a artist/writer in general, i don't have too many specific behaviors engrained? i'm pretty bad at getting started at writing things so clearly i haven't found the ritual that just gets me in the zone. also, with my depression, it gets hard to self-motivate to do things - often times i need external pressure/reinforcement (ideally positive, but, yknow. negative also works lol) to really get moving since it's easier to do things for others (or the idea of a general audience/'s enjoyment/validation) than find reason to do things for myself.

some preferences i do have include: having tea (jasmine and earl grey are some favorites), having a candle lit, writing at dusk/night. and then often times i reread old stuff i've written/posted to remind myself that i'm capable lol. after that, i just have to bully myself to get the ball rolling. the blank page really fucks with my head, enough so that i can't even make a new document to write my notes, i have to put them in my notes app or in the discord server i have with myself because it tricks me into thinking the stakes are way lower than i've convinced myself they are. (this is, ofc, on the occasion that i even have notes at all, which i often don't.)

something else i've found that unfortunately works for me is making writing the lesser of two evils; writing is one of those things that i love doing but never opt to do even though i want to? i wish i did? i hate it i dont know. even now, i'm writing this because i don't want to be writing an academic paper. i find it a lot easier to write fic/tion or other leisure types of writing when my alternative is doing something way more dreadful.

Do you have any writing superstitions? What are they and why are they 100% true?

honestly, i don't have a good answer for this one either. i wish i had a more glamorous writer lifestyle than my run-of-the-mill "start two days before it's due" or "hammer out two pages and then abandon the idea for two years" process. i feel like all of my writing habits are purely logistical and not spiritual. (maybe i should try and be more spiritual about it? i'd try anything to make writing an easier process but i also think i have a sort of house m.d. mentality about suffering and artistic process and whatnot.)

the only thing i can think of is that i can only look back and edit a few paragraphs behind my current progress. i can't go all the way back to the beginning and reread until the first draft is finished. if i realize a continuity error at the current point that would warrant needing to go way back, i still can't edit it, i have to leave myself a comment. only once i officially proofread/do a second draft can i touch any of the earlier stuff. again, though, this seems almost entirely logistical; i just know if i go back to reread, the rest will never get written. (tangent note: i have a friend who makes a new document for every draft. i don't know if that's normal? maybe like using layers for digital art? but i definitely don't do that. the doc i start in is the doc i paste my notes in is the doc my final draft is in)

also, once i post something/deem it finished, i will never edit the google doc again. i just believe in like, the sanctity of the way i chose to write something as the me i was at that point in time, including the font, grammar, cringiness, etc. (and i also like how google puts the timestamp of "last edited on [x]." if i edit it again, that timestamp won't be true to when the writing was finished.) this one's still not exactly superstitious, it's just like. you wouldn't go back to your childhood drawings and make edits.

What is your deepest joy about writing?

all of the typical artist shit rings true, of course - materializing something that didn't exist before; being able to create something that others can connect with; of course being a part of communities that share my interests and obsessions and nerdiness and insanity. the most indulgent part of it is the part where i get to play god in my own little head, projecting all of my emotional inner workings onto a character and getting to therapize them via their environment. allowing the things that depress or upset me to receive comfort and gentleness and understanding and all of the things i don't think i deserve when they're in my head.

and of course, writing is one of those things, like art, like any form of just - physically making marks - that is so innate. like how beautiful is that, that since the beginning of time one of the things we've always done is depict. illustrate. we just want to understand things. weather and outer space and the elements and animals and human nature. we sang songs to remember epics before we ever wrote them down. and god, damn, fuck its just one of those things that fucking gets me, deep down, that i'm just human and part of humankind and no different than anyone else has ever been, in a good way. that someone will sing the epic to me and i will sing it to someone else and i don't have to do some monumental thing to have a purpose; i can just pass on one more story.

[resisteverything]

I don't know who needs to hear this but Harry Styles being boring or dressing bad or having bad opinions doesn't mean he is straight. He kissed a man on the lips and wore a shirt describing wanting to fellate a man, and also having bad opinions on gay sex in movies means he is a man with an opinion on gay sex in movies, where he seriously has opinions on what makes a good gay sex scene.

Also the people who ran up to me saying he's a Zionist as a way of countering me for daring to suggest he might not be a lying hetero dude... and I am struggling to find any objective thing saying it, like he has gone out of his way to say nothing and his actions can both be used to argue for and against him being a Zionist. There is no objective way of saying it, and if he is he's certainly not helping the cause. Also Zionists can be gay, sorry to any people in the audience.

And yet there is a popular quote calling him a jock in freak clothing like any jock or bully would accept a boy band pretty boy with them.

"Harry Styles is not going to fuck you" Fuck you I am a heterosexual man now. This fucking line has driven me crazy for months like I have had fantasies of drawing harry styles with a knife through his head in my living room just to spite you people and it makes me wish he were a fictional character so I could do that. I do not listen to this mans music, I do not like his fashion, I do not like his opinions or choices. I do not like his face, or his personality, or his body. I do not know an album of his by name, and I would like him to just clip into the backrooms and be forgotten so I can stop hearing about him, because not even criticism of him is worth experiencing.

But because I think this man is in fact capable of being a homosexual, I must be his dickrider. Because being critical of an artist means validating the instinct to harass artists about their sexuality for their alleged straightness until they come out, which never has a negative effect on anyone.