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#and please someone what is their ship name lol
acourtofquestions · 2 months
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Please for the love of Wyrd tell me Celaena actually gets to say “I love you” to Sam at least once.
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catgirlsp0ck · 6 months
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hear me out... halsin/wyll/gale
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now, i know what you're probably thinking, "but wyll and gale aren't poly!" yes. i know. BUT- they also both deserve all the love in the world. anyway,, they would be the sweetest most lovesick throuple EVERRRRR. they'd be the kind of ppl to all buy each other flowers or something and try to hide it to make it a surprise and when they reveal, they find out they ALL ended up buying flowers for each other like in those proposal vids where they both propose at the same time... thats basically halsin/wyll/gale to me and im already obsessed with them
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ednacrabapple · 6 days
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I got some inside out legos and my ship is together on the side of the box 🥺
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leejeann · 3 months
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Seeing a comment on episode 60 that says "soukoku has never been more real" is so fucking funny, 10/10 guys
anyway only one more episode and then I'm caught up h el p
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pippuns · 2 years
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What are your top 5 ships (now or ever)?
my top five ships are uhhhhh
jiang cheng/happiness
liu//jiu (obviously), but i like lqg with any version of sqq
zhou ying/war crimes
dimi//leth will always be dear to me :')
and then like a bunch of oc stuff LOL
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iamred-iamyellow · 27 days
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⋆ ˚。⋆౨ৎ˚ Aussie Athletes
♥ pairing: oscar piastri x fem!sargeant!ballerina!reader
♥ smau - fluff
♥ notes: I said I'd write some ballet fics so here's one lol. I'm going to write some ship fic ballet au's (drivers as ballet dancers) after I finish my folklore and Romeo and Juliet series'. Also! I'm performing a don quixote variation this weekend so wish me luck lol :) (none of the pictures are mine)
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liked by logansargeant and 32,406 more
First Day @ ausballet
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logansargeant congrats sis
yourusername <3
user14 she's in Australia now 🫢
user3 PLEASE let that mean she'll be at more races now
yourusername 👀
user5 💗💗💗
oscarpiastri welcome to Australia
landonorris trying to get a date on main?
logansargeant don't even think about it piastri
oscarpiastri ???
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
2023 British GP
You walked into the paddock bright and early to find your brother before he was busy with qualifying. You ended up running into a different, yet familiar face instead. 
“Oh, hey Oscar,” you smiled 
“Didn’t expect you to be here with your new Australian ballet career,” he smirked and took a sip of the water he had in his hand. “You don’t have a busy schedule? 
“I do, but the season wrapped last month. I figured I’d come down here and support Logan, you know? I’ve got a lot of training to do when I get back, though.” you laughed softly. 
Oscar hummed in an understanding response. 
“How’s it been there?” 
“Good,” you paused. “Tough, too.” 
“I’m sure it is. It’s an art and a sport.” 
“People don't really consider what I do “a sport”.”
“They say the same about racing.” 
“I guess we have something to bond over.”  you smiled.
You both heard Lando call Oscar's name, gesturing for him to go to their garage. Oscar gave an awkward, blush-filled goodbye and ran towards the Brit on the other side of the pit lane.
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.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
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.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
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liked by oscarpiastri, landonorris, and 340,967 more
he says I'm so american
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lilymhe top golf double date
yourusername we are so there
user7 WHO IS HE
user9 y/n x oscar crumbs
user2 crying and writing fics
logansargeant 😐
yourusername ...
user6 @ landonorris please tell us she's with oscar
user8 why would lando know?
landonorris 🤐
user8 @ user6 I'm sorry I wasn't familiar with your game, clearly Lando does know
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
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liked by logansargeant, oscarpiastri, and 305,678 more
opening night 🧡
logansargeant you did amazing 💐
user2 the orange heart...
user5 NOT a coincidence
user8 AND it's f1's winter break meaning Oscar is back home in Australia where it just so happens y/n dances at
user4 the pieces of the puzzle are finally coming together
ausballet our sugar plum fairy
yourusername <3
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
Time Skip - 2024
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.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
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liked by charlesleclerc, oscarpiastri, and 670,895 more
MONACO <3
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charlesleclerc welcome to the piastri-leclerc family
yourusername I'm honored, thank you charles
oscarpiastri so when should she meet my brother leo?
user6 Y/N'S APART OF THE JOKE NOW 😭
user10 someone go get Nicole
user4 y/n l/n-piastri-leclerc
logansargeant don't break her heart
oscarpiastri I won't I swear
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welcomingdisaster · 3 months
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halls of mandos dashboard simulator... part 2
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Recommended for you!
🦊 fairfaefox Follow got a song on the tip of my tongue i haven't heard in like 400 years and it's driving me nuts. all i can remember about it is that it started with this really vivid image of burning ships & it had a drum beat that went sorta like dum deee dum ba beee crackle-crackle and got more intense as the song went on think it might have been in quenya? could be wrong
🌃wordsmithfoul Follow ........... ,,, op....... are you talking about the Ñoldolantë
🦊 fairfaefox Follow oh yeah that's it thanks! :)
🌧️ rainelf Follow SCREAMING LMAO OP???
👒 fllfrrur Follow
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🦊 fairfaefox Follow HJKHJHKJ GIRL IM AVARI LEAF ME ALONE 😭😭😭😭😭
🏇 doriath_dude Follow Exhibit #4555 of the insane Noldor-centrism of this goddamn website. Most culturally important song of our age to fucking WHOM?? #ugh #curas fights the noldor AGAIN #discourse
( 3555 notes )
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🌀positivitydaily Following positivity for elves that died in stupid and embarrassing ways! positivity for elves that don't have a cool and exciting death story! positivity for elves that fell off a cliff or drowned cave-diving or died of heartbreak over someone who was objectively speaking like a 6/10! no matter what posts get popular on here, it's totally OK not to have a cool death story nor does it make you any less worthy of reembodiment! lame death positivity!! #positivity #i'll go on record and say i died from mushroom poisoning
( 121 notes )
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🧵broiderycreature Mutuals look i know it's just selection bias from my beloved mutuals but i think it's funny to imagine we're all gonna leave the halls having transed our gender & gotten radicalized. like yeah mom i'm not the daughter you thought you had but more importantly we must abolish the monarchy #lol. lmao even ( 45 notes )
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🏰 Turgon_Of_Gondolin_1 Following Update: Minecraft server is back up, but I've disabled PvP and increased raiding protections. I will not name names, but please think before you act next time. ( 203 notes )
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💠 LoveStruckLoaf Mutuals hey girl uhhh. sorry your boyfriend didn't come to the halls of mandos. yeah no one can say what his fate is because it isn't woven into the tapestries on of the world i'm really sorry about that haha. uhh i guess he did chose it for himself so there's that. we're still cool right? #lariel's copium
( 108 notes )
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🔥Fëanáro_Official Follow
#If they are truly so loath to restrict us they ought not fear the voice of the people #Which I am sure shall be in my favor.
(12001 notes)
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🐝 bee-leg Following anyone know whom I petition to learn the everlasting fate of my lemur (beloved companion)? thank you faithfully #personal
( 8 notes )
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azure-cherie · 5 months
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Pac : About your next date
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Hey loves i hope y'all have been doing well let's get started please choose with your intuition, take what resonates ✨
Masterlist | Paid readings | paid readings 2
Pile 1
Whoever you will go on a date with next will be someone you have known for a while , or atleast you talk to them before you meet like for a month or some months def not a blind date , what I feel is really spontaneous lively and respectful, playful energy, this is a very feminine charged pile, whoever the feminine is will feel highly energised and will probably plan things out. I get a sense of spontaneous energy here , sudden plan , then you watch a movie , then you go to the library it's very fire sign coded, you guys might get each other very well emotionally, your person might be artistic and also very brave and bold . There's a sense of secrecy in this pile as well because you might have been afraid to tell people about this relationship well this date will change everything you might get the people talking but c'mon guys y'all are so cute who wouldn't talk about you . Y'all are getting out of your comfort zone there is adventure , acceptance and courage and so so much love for your next date . I also feel that you will be connecting a lot on the level and basis of creativity and heal your inner child in the process . Might be an outdoor or hilly date , this person could be an earth sign or work in the mass communication industry . They're generous and they'd do anything for the people they love . You guys might be slow dancingggg🫶
Pile 2
Your next date might be planned by a friend or a family member probably your mother , i sense matchmaker, marriage, arranged marriage energy. This person is quite wealthy, they have a beautiful smile and they're one with nature . What I feel is so much emotional connection in this pile , this can happen as in a long drive , cruise ship or a walk is significant. For a long time you've been wishing to God for someone who can really get you on an emotional level and this will just be them , they'll open subconscious parts of your brain that you wouldn't even know existed but one thing about that is that they would trigger you a lot to understand you and the people around you , I feel like there's someone driving this connection for the first date . Haha the interesting part is you guys will feel a lot of sexual tension might even hookup with this person lol but this is only for some of you guys . I see you guys enjoying a lot , this is giving me NRI Indian vibes tbh . I see drinks partying and also enjoying in the nature like both of you watching the garden under the influence, one thing about this date is that you will be enlightened to the next level of your life , i see discussions of spirituality and life . Might be an earth sign. They're very beautiful/handsome , i think this person has a lot of layers , you'll require time to understand them . 🌀
Pile 3
For this pile i sense that both of you or either one of you has escaped a toxic relationship and now you're picking yourself up again and for the some minority I sense that this can be someone who literally plotted to get to you 😭 very careful moves and they tried to get a chance with you for a long time . They have very beautiful eyes and they have a very genuine kind and generous spirit tho . Oh bro for some of you i think they'll talk about marriage in this date itself , they're so in love with you it's kind of driving them crazy but they're trying to maintain they're calm by acting nonchalant 😂 like they're not praying the gods for you lol , I feel that this could also be one of your manifestation or the result of a love spell . This person is someone who has become rich , they might have been born without many privileges but they made their own name and their own fame , i see some sense of transformation in the date you will get a sense of who you want as a person and who you don't though this person might be good you might reconsider if you wanna be with them for some people here , might take some time to think on it . I also get that you have multiple options to choose from . This relationship might bring a new beginning for you if you choose this, this date is approached from a very detached perspective though you're kind of an emotional person . I also do sense intense attraction and connection on soul level . This date will be relieving you will forget the worries in your life and just be present . This person will ground you a lot and give you the place to be you . There's a lot of love from one side and detachment from the other .
Pile 4
For this pile i sense bittersweet energy this might be someone you're in reconciliation with or just last date energy, I feel that one of you might feel that your cup is empty that you cannot pour anymore into this relationship, I see a lot of talking and working things out and if they don't go well going the seperate ways , i don't think either of you are toxic but it's giving the last day of school prom day energy you're gonna be busy in your own life. Ahhh I think one of you is about to move countries i see some crying as well . You guys have so much respect for each other. Btw I see that one of you is definitely waiting for the other to return . This is literally giving me war energy. There's some important thing there going away from I feel like saying " I'm away to protect us in search of a dreamland " this is giving me vintage Hollywood war time vibes😭 Atonement vibes 😭 . I sense that this person will talk about their goals and you will talk about how much you're gonna miss each other . I do sense true love in this pile . Things are gonna be slow and you might feel sacred but the hope is shown by the magician card things will turn out in your favour fr . So i remember this quote from a movie " in the end whole life becomes an act of letting go ......" Idk this energy is so intense and also very deep I think you guys should spend time together maybe meditate. I also feel you have a telepathic connection and you both are really sacrificial for each other . I see you both talking about life , nature, philosophy and sleeping dancing together this is a very casual beautiful energy . I hope you the best guys take hugs 🫂
Thank you so much for reading 🤍
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bunnyreaper · 9 months
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𝖈𝖔𝖑𝖑𝖆𝖗𝖘 𝖆𝖓𝖉 𝖈𝖆𝖌𝖊𝖘
𝔞 𝔰𝔬𝔞𝔭 𝔪𝔞𝔠𝔱𝔞𝔳𝔦𝔰𝔥 𝔵 𝔯𝔢𝔞𝔡𝔢𝔯 𝔰𝔢𝔯𝔦𝔢𝔰
𝖕𝖙 2 — 𝖕𝖙 1 𝖍𝖊𝖗𝖊, 𝖕𝖙 3 𝖍𝖊𝖗𝖊
wc - 5.2k
warnings - 18+/nsfw, dom sub dynamic, smut, phone sex, wee bit of angst, brief mention of the word 'daddy'
notes - vibrating with both excitement and fear, but hoping y'all love this like you loved the last one!! also on ao3! ♥
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Johnny was right to send you to bed when he did because you're already struggling to get through the day, and on any less sleep, you might have fallen asleep at your desk. Clearly, you're terrible at making decisions for yourself, if that wasn't already evidenced by the nearly empty fridge accompanied by the pile of empty takeout containers.
It's not even the end of the workday yet, and you're beat—except staying up with Johnny was so worth it, getting to hear his voice and everything he said was complete bliss. You only wish he was here now, whispering in your ear and making your day go by quicker. Unfortunately, the sad reality is that beyond your good morning text, you haven't heard from him since, and you hate that you already feel like you're suffering from withdrawals. 
Again, that could be the lack of sleep, or adequate nutrition, or the fact that lately you haven't exactly been the most social person, and you've definitely been missing social contact. All of that missing need you just want to be filled by Johnny, Johnny, Johnny—his name like a chanted prayer in your mind. 
You at least have the sense of mind to focus when you need to, but at any idle moment, Johnny crawls back into your brain. Your mind drifts to wondering what he's up to, wondering where in the world they've shipped him off to this time—what timezone is he even in? What hemisphere? 
5 p.m. comes round sooner than you expect, and you find yourself logging off from your work laptop with a relieved sigh. You might be exhausted from lack of sleep, but Johnny's arrival in your life left you energised in a way you hadn't felt in so long. Every part of you hums with excitement, thinking about what the future might hold. 
You have to keep snapping yourself out of getting lost in the fantasy, even as you find yourself rereading through texts and committing Johnny's words to memory. The last time you did this still sticks in the back of your mind, still stings—someone who came into your life and was everything until they were nothing. Someone who said they could be trusted as they broke down your barriers. 
The aching loneliness was too much, so you'd run from it straight into something worse, not even realising how easily you fell into the trap. 
Your thoughts were spiraling, and you needed a distraction, so you put on the TV in the hopes of getting lost in the shitty reality dating show you've been watching lately. 
A few hours later, the buzz of your phone pulls you from the drama of the screen—your spirits soaring as you see the little icon you're rapidly growing attached to. 
Evening bonnie, hope you're not napping too close to bed time. 
hi!! no... for once, lol. how was your day? 
Long, but thoughts of you got me through ;) how was yours? 
The rapid responses mean your smile never has time to waver, as your eyes are glued to the screen watching as the messages are read, the app tells you he is typing and then another one of his messages appears. 
Your fingers fly across the keyboard as you eagerly respond.
somehow managed to not fall asleep at my desk, i would've napped but... 
But? 
didn't want to risk missing any messages from you. 
Johnny heart reacts to the message immediately. 
Call? 
please!!! 
Mere seconds later, his face fills the screen once more, and your sheer excitement overtakes your nerves by far.
"Hi." You say shyly, as soon as you accept the call.
"Hi bonnie, gotcha on loudspeaker by the way." He greets you, his voice immediately sending warmth through you. 
You were rapidly growing obsessed with his terms of endearment, too. 
"Oh." You pause, suddenly self-conscious and hesitant. "Are you not alone?" Does anyone in his life even know you exist? You know you haven't really mentioned to your friends that you're 'dating' again.
"Definitely am, don't worry. Jus' need ma hands free." 
At that, your brow furrows, your voice filling with both mischief and disbelief. "What are you doing, Johnny?" 
He chuckles, before rustling some papers around. "Paperwork, nothing fun." 
Even hearing the word paperwork right now drains you, and can hear that Johnny isn't exactly pleased with the idea either. 
"Wishing I was under the desk again?" You ask, hoping your playful tone will make him smile. 
"Dinnae start." He groans. "What are you doing? Have you eaten?" 
"Not yet, I need to check my milk is still in date." You throw yourself off the sofa and make your way through to the kitchen—it's a good job Johnny actually poked you to eat. 
"Milk?" His voice is filled with confusion.
"For cereal." 
"Ach." 
"I can feel your disapproval from here." You can practically sense him shaking his head disapprovingly too. 
"Good, I see how this gonae be." He sighs, the disappointment evident, along with that sense of control, guidance. 
It just makes you tingle.
"Yes, daddy?" You giggle audaciously like you know exactly what you're doing, and hope it has the effect you want it to.
Johnny chokes, and then growls... and then sighs. "Away n bile yer heid." He whispers, yet he sounds anything but angry, his voice thick with arousal as he undoubtedly fights all kinds of urges. 
You want to take that step with Johnny, to dirty talk with him now that you feel comfortable, but you suppose now isn't the time—after all, he is still working. 
"I'm being mean now, sorry." 
"A right brat." He growls playfully. "Do something for me, lass?" 
The shift in his tone and the previous conversation topic gives you a good guess at what's coming next. "Is it cooking a real meal?" You groan playing into the role.
Well, admittedly committing to self-care tasks like cooking isn't the easiest thing in the world, and having someone to guide you in that is... a turn-on. 
"Knew you were a smart girl." He purrs, and those words turn your brain and your body to mush. 
You have to stifle a whine from leaving you, as your face flushes furiously. Oh, how you wish you could hear that over and over again—in that voice, with that accent, whispered right in your ear as he—
"What you gonna cook?" He asks, interrupting your rapidly spiraling thoughts. 
Staring into the fridge is a depressing experience—the shelves are mostly bare and there's a faint smell of something off. "Ugh, I don't have a lot in, to be honest." 
"Logging onto the Tesco website now, or maybe meal delivery service..." He muses, and you can imagine the smirk on his lips.
"Johnny!" Your protest is weak, as the coddling and infantalisation make you feel something you probably shouldn't. 
He snickers at your tone, but he knows now that if things are to continue, he won't listen to your objections. "Jokin'... for now. Talk me through yer fridge, lass." 
"Do you cook?" You ask, wondering if he's going to magically talk you through a recipe with the condiments in your fridge and the dried pasta in the pantry. 
There's a beat of silence. "Not often." 
You're overcome with a fit of giggles and a wave of faux offense. "Then who are you to lecture me?" 
Johnny meets your exclamation with a series of tuts, which already quiet your discontent, but you find yourself ruined when his voice drops and he delivers his next few words. "What happened to 'Johnny knows best'?" 
Fuck him, using his powers for good—and you can already tell he's getting off on it too. Today, you won't indulge him by submissively repeating it back, since he's making you face the horror that is cooking.
"Fine." You sigh, looking for what items in the fridge that are actually still in date. You pull open a cupboard or two as well. "I have... hummus and celery and uh, supernoodles in the cupboard." 
"Better than cereal." He waits for your response that doesn't come, as you pout on the end of the phone, and then he plays his next move flawlessly.  "For me, bonnie girl?" 
The plea in his voice makes you melt, makes you want to do just about anything for him. 
"For you." You say with a smile, grabbing the packets of noodles and a saucepan. "Have you eaten?" 
"A have, chicken tikka masala." 
You sigh, knowing that if not for Johnny you could've ordered a nice Indian for yourself—you get to work on the noodles anyway. "Kinda jealous now, if I'm honest."
His laugh is short but earnest. "Same, haven't had beefy supernoodles in an age." 
"Yeah, I would hope they're feeding you actually decent, nutritious food over there." 
He huffs. "I would hope you're feeding yerself decent food, but here we are." That playful judgement is back, lacing his words and making you crave his approval. 
It's a startling thought, that here you are, only a few days in and needing his praise, his encouragement—you suppose it comes easy as it plays into both of your natural instincts—his to lead, yours to follow.
"Less sass, more... paperwork." You grumble playfully, trying to cover up the fact that, maybe, you like being teased by him. 
"Aye." He laughs, and you can briefly hear him scribbling in the silence.  
For a few moments, it's just the sound of him writing and you cooking, but the quiet feels comfortable rather than awkward—strangely routine and domestic after such a short space of time. 
Your mind wanders back to what the two of you had discussed last night, about his day later in the week. "Have you thought more about Friday?" 
There's a brief shuffle and the sound of the call changes as Johnny seems to take you off the loudspeaker and moves around. "Meetin' you?" 
"Yeah." There's a sense of nervousness within you, a fear he's going to suddenly decide that he doesn't want to see you after all, that he doesn't see this going anywhere. It's so soon, and yet the thought seems crushing. 
"Haven't thought of much else." His confession seems to settle your rapidly beating heart just a little, the sincerity in his voice making your stomach twist and turn. 
Maybe you shouldn't push it, but you want to meet him more than anything, so you can make the first step toward all of this becoming real. "Would you be up for coffee? I can come to you!" 
"About that..." His sigh is weary, and panic overtakes you as the silence stretches on. "Am leaving for a week or so." 
It's not a total rejection at least, but somehow it still stings, still settles heavy and unpleasant in your gut. "When?" 
"Tomorrow." He falls silent, waiting for you to say something, yet you don't know what words to even summon right now. "'m sorry, lass." 
You take a deep breath for a moment, collecting your thoughts as you stir your noodles and try to put everything you feel into some sort of coherent order. 
There's no logical reason to feel rejected, as it's not that he doesn't want the date, but that he can't. Perhaps it's that lingering thought that this kind of thing will be a frequent occurrence—it's just a small taste of what's to come. But wanting Johnny means handling this, like he deserves. 
You push through the discomfort and force yourself into a more positive mindset.
"But... after that? Or is this just because you hate coffee so much you're fleeing the country?" You laugh softly, hoping the joke will lighten the thick atmosphere. 
"Now, if you'd asked me out for tea..." He laughs in return, before turning serious. "But... when I'm back, I'd love to see you. Have ta, really. " 
"I'm glad." The beaming smile on your face is ridiculous, and you're so thankful he can't see you grinning like an idiot at his words. He has to meet you. 
With your cooking complete, you take the saucepan off the stove and pour the noodles into a bowl, grabbing it before returning to the comfort of the couch. "Okay, noodles done." 
"Wanna call me back once yer done, or?" 
Fuck, he's so considerate. 
You hum negatively as you start to blow on the noodles to cool them. "I'll eat on the phone if you don't mind the sound of me slurping." 
Johnny chuckles, before making a suggestive noise. 
"The noodles, Johnny." 
He coughs, covering more juvenile laughter. "Aye, the noodles, of course." 
"So... going anywhere fun?" You ask, referencing his upcoming deployment. 
"Classified, I'm afraid." He answers curtly, but you know it's nothing more than his duty. 
No questions about that, then, you suppose. It's going to be a strange thing to adjust to, but it's another thing that comes along with accepting Johnny into your life. You change your line of questioning, hopefully to something he can answer. "Are you... scared?" 
"No." He answers quickly and firmly, in a manner that suggests certainty rather than bravado. "Don't worry about me, hen." He rushes to add.
"Kinda hard not to, even if we only just met..." You sigh, but you suppose you have to trust Johnny's skills and training. "I imagine it only gets more intense from here." 
The admission feels like a swift kick to the stomach. 
"Yeah..." You hear a knock on the door from Johnny's end, and he swears colourfully under his breath. "Ach, can I call yer back?" 
It's almost cruel the way such timing drives the point home. 
"Sure, things to attend to?" You ask absentmindedly, not really expecting an answer. 
He sighs, before trying to turn his tone more positive. "Aye, but I'll catch you before bed, yeah?" 
"Yeah. Bye, Johnny." 
"Bye, lass." 
He ends the call, leaving you with your meal and your thoughts. 
Maybe you aren't strong enough to deal with this after all, you think, trying to settle the ugly, gnawing feeling inside you. It already hurts, but maybe that's because you're trying to hold so tight onto something intangible. Maybe if you and Johnny become something, mean something to each other, it'll all be easier to deal with. 
It's an hour or so later when you're tucked up in bed that Johnny's call lights up your phone. You pick it up instantly. 
"Hey, glad you haven't fallen asleep already." He chuckles, his voice softer than before. 
"Mmm, still hanging on." You mumble, cheek pressed into plushness and tiredness lingering at the back of your mind, as well as the mess of feelings that still simmers within you. 
"Cuddled up with the big B?" He asks, voice cheeky and charming. 
You can't help the soft giggle at the ridiculous nickname. "The big B?!"
"Barnaby!" He clarifies with a hearty laugh, not ashamed at all of his goofiness. 
"The big B! That's so silly" 
The laughs quiet, and another silence falls, but this time you feel the discomfort that comes with it. 
Johnny is the first to breach it, his tone tinged with worry. "How are yer?"
"I'm fine." You sigh, not wanting to elaborate and get yourself upset again. It's not far from the truth. Nothing has changed, but this is something you have to learn to sit with, have to make peace with for both of your sake. 
Johnny cuts right through the noise. "Yer seemed a little upset earlier. Wanna talk about it?" 
Communication—the key to any good relationship, an essential to any kinky one, and one thing you think you really kind of suck at. 
It's a simple sentence with a simple answer, and nothing about Johnny suggests that his reaction will be anything other than supportive—but it's not Johnny's voice that whispers cruel things in the back of your head. And for now, Johnny's influence is not enough to quiet the storm. 
The fear grips at your heart, stops your words right in your throat, but your mind wars between the ghosts of your past and the duty of your present and future. 
Johnny waits quietly, not pushing you for an answer or assuming how you feel, and that small act helps pull you out of the fog and helps you force yourself to speak. 
"Reality setting in, I guess." The words don't come easy at first, your throat tight—but once you start, the rest just seems to flow, taking the weight of your burdens with them. "Like, it's not too bad right now, it's just... knowing what's in store? Assuming we keep talking." 
The opportunity to really put your thoughts in order and get them out actually does help, surprisingly.
Johnny goes silent for a moment, considering your words before he speaks. "If you wanna stop—" 
"I don't." You feel bad for interrupting him, but you already know that's not what you want, even if he sees it as a kindness. "Like I said yesterday, I'm not faint-hearted... the intensity just took me by surprise. All of this has, really." 
"I'm with you there. Sat here thinking about how I'm gonna be thinking of anything else when I'm on the mission." He laughs softly, the sound laden with emotion. "Lt's gonna have my head." 
The gravity of his job sinks in now, with the realisation that he will be busy and focused, and rightfully so.
"Will you be able to get in touch while you're gone?" You ask, more for informational purposes, rather than being unable to last a week without hearing his voice. 
"Not a whole lot, no. Sometimes no' at all, but I'll let you know when I can." He states plainly, and the honesty is so refreshing. 
"I'll try not to bother you too much then." You giggle, though you don't really mean your words. He has his mission, and you have yours—stay strong while he's gone. 
He scoffs instantly. "You? A bother? Never." 
You hum, continuing with your playful statements. "You haven't seen me when I'm clingy." 
"A like clingy, am clingy too." 
Ugh, just when you think he can't be more perfect, he comes out with that. The sweet smile on your face is relentless, and you just know the same is true for him too. "Oh yeah? So you won't be complaining when we meet, and I just take a hold of your hand and don't let go." 
His barked laugh is so genuine that it makes your heart sing. "Bold of yer to assume I'd be letting you go, lass." 
The thought of even his hand in yours is enough to send you into a frenzy—a simple, delicate, and chaste act, yet you crave it like nothing else. When your date finally does come around, you'll be able to touch him and see him up close. You'll be able to hear that voice and those words up close and unrestrained by the slightly shitty quality of the phone call—and that is a little terrifying.  
"I guess waiting isn't a bad thing after all, maybe I'll be less nervous by then." Because right now you know you'd hesitate to reach out and touch him, would struggle looking him in the eye for too long. Maybe if you wait, the radiance that is Johnny's warmth will wear off, but somehow you doubt it. 
"Why ya nervous?" 
You almost snort at such an oblivious question from such a seemingly smart man. "Have you seen you?" Have you talked to you? Been on the end of your affections? Your mind pleads. 
"See this ugly mug every day." He grumbles, though you can still hear the smile. 
"You can't see, but I'm rolling my eyes." You giggle. "But what if I just... can't resist you? Jump you right then and there?" Your voice takes on a more teasing tone. 
"In public?" He tuts, slow and sexy, his voice dropping low. "Naughty girl." 
You straight up whimper. "Needy girl, for you." 
A growl leaves his throat, along with a whispered "Fuck." 
Arousal floods through you, overtakes you, as you feel your mind slipping to a space of deep-seated need, all for him. You feel on fire, your skin hypersensitive to the brush of the sheets, as your lower body hums and begs for attention. No longer can you hold yourself back from falling under his sexy spell. "Your groans, your voice, it all drives me crazy." 
The laugh that leaves him is weaker, choked with arousal. "All wet fer me, bonnie?" His voice, now a touched graveled, wraps so wonderfully around every word. 
"Soaked." You squirm in place, not even needing to feel to know just how dripping you are—every time he teases you, you practically gush. Your spare hand dives below the sheets, tracing ever so slightly over your stomach as it crawls lower. "Johnny?" 
"Yes, bonnie?" It sounds like his control is wavering too. 
"Please can I touch? I need it so bad." You whine and plead, surrendering yourself to Johnny's command. 
"You don't—" Another growl leaves his throat, you hear him shuffle and when his voice returns, he sounds even more aroused than before—sweet, gentle domination drips from his tone. "Touch yerself, go on." 
You comply immediately, your hand diving under your waistband and zeroing in on your swollen clit—relief floods you the second you make contact, your fingers rubbing delicate swirls on your soaked nub as gentle moans force themselves free. 
"Oh fuck." Johnny's breathing is ragged between his groans. "Gonna have tae join ya." 
"Fuckfuckfuck." Your eyes slip shut as you imagine him reaching down to free his aching cock, all for you. Your thoughts center on conjuring up an image of how long and thick you imagine him to be. "Is... is your cock as big as the rest of you?" 
You squeak out your words while you still have command over the English language.
"Guess you'll find out soon enough." He chuckles breathlessly, some of the words catching in his throat as he clearly works himself. "But I don't think you'll be disappointed. I know how tae take care of yer, know you're already desperate for me." 
Your circles quicken, his words sending pleasure coursing through you in a way that almost feels better than your touch. You fill the air with breathy moans. "Need you, Johnny." 
"Need you too, pet." He growls his words over the building slick sound.
"Oh fuck." Your reaction is instant, the word sending everything in your brain into overdrive. Pet. Pet. You almost cum right then and there, but his assault on your senses and sensibilities continues. 
"God, thinking about you on the end of a leash for me? So fuckin' hard thinking about it." His voice modulates between and whine and a growl, his need growing furiously. "I'd be so fuckin' lucky." 
You imagine the collar slipping around your neck, imagine Johnny clicking shut a lock and attaching a leash—pulling you to him just as he is now with every word. 
"I'd be the most loyal pet ever, I swear." You start to babble, unable to hold back any longer on the wave of submission that overtakes you. "I'll Wait for you to come home, naked and kneeling with my leash ready." 
"Jesus, fuck." Each grunt that leaves him makes you shiver. Each word like its own bolt of electricity straight from his body to yours. "Yeah, my good girl would be so lost without me." He says it with such certainty, speaking the truth to life. 
"I get separation anxiety like mad. I'll miss your touch, miss your smell, miss your taste—" You cut yourself off with a high-pitched whine, your fingers working you so fucking close to the edge.
"Don't worry, I'd fuck you so good before I go bonnie, fill yer up and leave you dripping with me." His groans are accompanied by more of those slick sounds. "Mark that pretty neck o' yours, too." 
"I'm... I'm not gonna last." You admit, holding back even now from cumming—you crave his permission. 
"Me either. Go on, moan for me, let me hear you." He urges you gently, even if his voice is filled with need. 
You let all your noises flow freely as you teeter toward the edge and desperately try to please him with the sounds you make. It's all too good, too much, too overwhelming. 
"Johnny, can I—" 
His demand is out of his mouth before you can even finish your sentence. "Cum fer me, bonnie. Go on." 
You cum with a strangled cry, flying over the edge right as Johnny demands it. The build-up of the past few days along with Johnny's noises has you shaking in ecstasy—ecstasy that's only prolonged when he cums too with a long, drawn-out groan.
After a moment, the only sound is both of your heavy breathing, as you come down from your high. 
"Oh my god." You sigh, a silly, blissed-out grin overtaking your features.
"You okay, sweet girl?" His voice returns to that sweetness you're coming to know and love.
You nod mindlessly, even though he can't see you. "Better than okay, are you?" 
He hums in affirmation, before his voice turns a touch serious. "You did so good. Just want tae make sure you're good, and a didn't go too far." 
"Hah, I mean, nowhere near too far." You admit shakily. 
"Am glad, it's only early days, though. That trust..." He hesitates. 
"... It takes a while, yeah." The post-orgasmic bliss coupled with the feeling of that trust taking root and growing. "I'm glad you understand." 
And he understands perfectly, as you never feel pushed or rushed, only pampered and adored. 
"Of course... it's special, for both of us." He admits, and you know you're on the same wavelength when it comes to the bond and relationship between dominant and submissive. 
"Mhmm." You hum dreamily, wholeheartedly agreeing and yet not able to summon up something profound. 
"Already sleepy?" His laughter is soft and sincere. 
"I'd get so much rest if every night was like this." 
"Even more so when I finally get to fuck ya, bonnie." He whispers so casually, yet even after your orgasm your clit still thrums with interest—God, he has such a hold on you.
"Yeah?" You sigh, dreaming of the day you'll get to experience it. 
"Yeah." 
The line falls silent, and you feel yourself fading. 
"I'm sorry, I'm so... sleepy." You whisper while you still have the chance. 
"It's okay, sweet girl, close yer eyes. Am right here." Johnny's sweet voice lulls you closer and closer, and your phone falls free from your hand to your pillow, resting there with Johnny just on the end of the line. 
"Goodnight Johnny." You mumble, before sleep finally takes you.
"Goodnight, Bonnie." His reply is soft, carrying you off to unconsciousness as he drifts off too.  
-//-
Johnny practically vibrates where he stands—wired beyond belief. Part of it is his usual pre-mission adrenaline, but the events of the past few days especially almost have him climbing the walls. His energy is frenetic as usual but with so much more—lust, yearning, withdrawal. 
It's only been a few hours since he ended the call after waking up before you, and yet he finds his thoughts unable to leave you, even as he finishes gearing up. You'd love to see him like this, and an idea strikes him.
He pulls out his phone, turns to the man beside him, and hopes he doesn't regret asking. Then again, some ribbing from the masked man would be nothing compared to the floored reaction he'd get from you.
"Ghost?" He asks, piercing the comfortable silence between the two of them. 
"What?" Ghost turns, eyeing Johnny and his hand holding his outstretched phone.
Johnny doesn't waver, sure in his request, and eager to see your response. "Take a picture of me, yeah?" 
"Girl back home?" Ghost asks, cutting straight to the point as he takes the phone. "Is this the first time she's seeing you? Cause you look fuckin' rough." 
"No." Johnny frowns, and worry washes over him. Surely Lt. is just messing him around—he knows she'll be happy to see him either way. 
Ghost pulls off a glove and navigates to the camera before stepping back and holding up the phone in Johnny's direction. He might be giving Johnny shit, but he at least takes the time to angle and position the frame in a way that compliments Johnny's stature. "She like the tac gear?" 
Johnny sighs, wishing this was over already. "Just take the picture, Ghost." 
"Say cheese." Ghost deadpans, and the softest of smiles graces Johnny's features—for her, not for him.
Johnny practically snatches the phone back from Ghost's hands, checking out the photo immediately. "Thanks." 
He pulls up their messages immediately, firing off the picture with a kissing face and a teasing message just for her. 
When he locks the phone and throws it in his bag, Ghost's eyes are fixed on him, his blackened eyes narrowed.
"Mind on the mission, yeah, Johnny?" 
Johnny nods, doing his best to push thoughts of her away for now, and letting his inner soldier take over. He'll be back to her before he knows it. "Aye, Lt." 
Days later, and after a successful first phase of the mission, Johnny stares down at his phone. The signal is nonexistent and won't return for a while, but he misses you, his mind is itching with his need for you. In this shitty safe house in the middle of nowhere, while someone else is on watch, there's very little to do, and truly nothing else he'd rather think about. 
He scrolls to the top of your messages, rereading each message and reliving each conversation, experiencing all over again how each message made him feel. 
Your sweet texts, your copious use of emojis, and your cute little selfies—it was all so intoxicating to him. For a man who was so used to maintaining focus, you were a fucking curveball. Something about you just sends his protective instincts into overdrive, makes unearned possessive tendrils curl up through him and around his heart—calls out to his guiding, dominant, caring side.
He has to constantly stamp down the thoughts inside that called out to him to find you, scoop you up, and take you home with him. Luckily for you both, Johnny is a patient man. He spends time out in the field waiting days for anything interesting to happen, he's spent years waiting for his pet, his girl to come along—and you're right there. He can wait a little longer. 
He holds down the record button, intent on recording a message for you, and begins whispering into the phone.
"Hi, been sat on my arse for far too long with nothing to do but think of you. Dinnae think I'll get signal anytime soon, but I 'spose it'll send at some point." He feels himself relax just a little as he falls into Johnny, the man—rather than Soap, the soldier.
"Been thinking about our first date, since you mentioned coffee. Kinda had a crazy idea actually, but I need your input. What about a cat café? Has to be one in that city o' yours, and I figure you must like kitties."
"Won't be long until you might be one for me... or a bunny... or a puppy." He interrupts himself with a sigh.
"Need tae stop those thoughts and quit while I'm ahead. Let me know, yeah? As soon as I get my leave, we'll set it up."
"Talk soon, bonnie." 
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vershl · 1 month
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Okay I think I made y'all wait long enough LOL
SORRY THEY'RE ALL UNCLOTHED BTW, I HAVENT FIGURED OUT OUTFITS YET- 💀
I don't really have a lot to share tbh in terms of lore/plans. This AU is very VERY fresh in my brain atm. But I will fill in some details for you guys so you somewhat/mostly understand the current characters I have for now.
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Shadow
He is a red diamond (ultimate lifeform yada yada), and as stated, a "blood" diamond. I mean this somewhat in modern terms, but not entirely. In real life, diamonds mined in a war zone and sold to fund the costs, hence "blood". In this case; Shadow was created by the other diamonds (primarily white) as a weapon, the plan was to have a gem on equal footing in terms of strength and power that they could order around to do their bidding and do their dirty work.
Clearly, that didn't work out the way they wanted. Shadow pretended to be obedient, following white, and the other diamond's orders. He shattered other gems for whatever reason the diamonds deemed fit (among other things I haven't decided on yet), only doing so to avoid the risk of being deemed defective and shattered himself, or the gem being shattered regardless by someone else.. he at least knew he could give them a swift end without pain.
Once Shadow gained the diamonds trust to wander around as he pleased, the moment no one was looking, he stole a ship and left Homeworld. Going as far as he could into the universe until he found Mobius and crash landed there. It wasn't very long before Sonic found him, and eventually became allies, inviting Shadow into the Crystal Gems, to which he accepted, and chose the name 'Shadow'. He didn't want to be called 'Red' or 'Red Diamond' anymore. He was free now. (This is as far as I got with him, sorry y'all HAHA)
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Sonic
Sonic is a yellow prism in the shape of an isotoxal star (the yellow is a nod to super Sonic). In my AU, because offical SU lore with gems is relatively limited, different colored gems even if of the same type, give different abilities/powers. In Sonic's case, yellow prisms give the ability of super speed, because of course, and he chose his name based on that fact as well.
Lore wise with Sonic-- He's the leader of the Crystal Gems (makes more sense considering the CG's signature symbol is a yellow star, so I just ran with that but changed the normal star to the isotoxal). But that's all I have for him.
the rest of these characters have 0 lore at all, i will just try to explain their gems a bit- sorry
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Amy
Amy is a Mimetite, a heart stone which helps with emotional stability, inner balance, serenity, joy, and adventure (according to google). Because Amy is basically canonically that 'therapy' friend, mimetite fits perfectly with her personality. As you can see, there are only a few designs that have weapons currently, Amy's being obvious because it's her signature weapon and just works here in the AU as well.
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Tails
Tails is a yellow peridot, it's obvious why, and I don't need to elaborate LOL. There isn't much different between peridot colors, it's more-so personality traits than abilities. Green peridots are quite egotistical and arrogant in themselves, while yellow peridots are more adventurous and selfless.
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Knuckles
Sorry for his naked hands btw. Honestly, I don't think I have to explain why Knuckles is a garnet. It just tracks. (Reminder that in the show, Garnet isn't a real garnet, it's just what she decided to call herself. In this case, Knuckles IS a real garnet.) Is his signature gem weapon gauntlets/gloves, yes. Did I steal the idea from Garnet? Shut up. :] Besides, Knuckles needed his usual gloves somehow, and he fights by punching shit anyway, so why not? Star on the back of the gloves ofc for obvious reasons.
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Rouge
GOD this stupid bat bitch, aaaanyway, ahem. In my AU beryls are information gatherers, either by stealing it or manipulating their way into obtaining it. Beryls are generally under diamond control and report back to their assigned diamond with information they demand for, obviously Rouge is part of the Crystal Gems, so she gathers information for them. And more often than not...is her usual self, and snoops around, digging up dirty secrets/information about her comrades and teases them to no end with it (Shadow being her favorite to torment for... reasons.)
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Silver
I chose Silver to be a sapphire simply because of the fact that in the Sonic universe, he can time travel. So instead of time travel in this Steven Universe AU, he gets future vision. I mean it works, right?
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Blaze
We can talk about her gem right.. right? It's really tasty and I want to eat it. So; opals are very, VERY rare (which fits with her whole being a princess thing or whatever). She was originally going to be a fire opal... that is until I found out about dragon's breath opals and changed my mind. Blaze is an absurdly rare gem, who knows, maybe even the only one of her cut. :]
Her gem gives her the ability to control fire as a weapon, and her unique cut gives her fire more power as well as makes the flames an unusual pinkish hue.
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And that's everyone for now! I'm doing some little doodles that I might post a bit later on to compile together, but you can have the two I made of Shadow for now. eats him
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what are your fav buddie au’s? i’m looking for like cute/ mild angst but with a happy ending? for reference i like the au’s where neither one of them is a firefighter, like they’re a chef or a barista or a teacher, stuff like that! but i also like when one of them is a firefighter and one isn’t! honestly im not picky i’m just on a “fluff buddie getting together au” kick right now lol!!!❤️❤️❤️
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well you have come to the right place! au's my most beloved. i'm also known as the au queen 😂 (since i'm combining these asks, i'll put which one's are angsty) i tried to stick to more “normal jobs” so i hope these are what y’all are looking for <33 as always if anyone else has other recs, please feel free to add them!
pick a star on the dark horizon (follow the light) Bob_loblaws_lawblog @bi-buckrights (army buddie/angsty)
winner takes it all buddiefication (pumpkincreamcoldbrew) | (hockey buck/baseball player eddie/ light angst)
now our love lives in the radio | heartbeatdiaz @loserdiaz (college au/ radio host buck/ fluffy)
traded | Princessfbi @princessfbi (hockey buck/ bartender eddie/ light angst)
falling for you (when you're miles away) | MonsterRae1 @monsterrae1 (long distance relationship/ buck is a course teacher for LAFD/ angst)
cordolia verse (bakery au) | MonsterRae1 @monsterrae1 (baker!eddie/barista!buck/ fluff)
kiss me before it's over (if only for a minute) | Bob_loblaws_lawblog @bi-buckrights (baseball buddie/light angst)
come love, | colonoscopys (business man buck meets bodyguard eddie/ angsty)
don't play games (come my way) | letmetellyouaboutmyfeels @letmetellyouaboutmyfeels (buisnessmen buddie/light angst)
a wednesday in a café (i watched it begin again) | MonsterRae1 @monsterrae1 (nurse!eddie/firefighter buck/coffee shop au/fluff)
made your mark on me (a golden tattoo) | heartbeatdiaz @loserdiaz (tattoo artist!eddie/fluffy)
wastin' my time when it was always you |heartbeatdiaz @loserdiaz (childhood friends to lovers/navy seal buck/angsty)
eyes like sinking ships (in waters so inviting) |heartbeatdiaz @loserdiaz (lifeguard!buck/more fluff than angst)
falling slowly; sing your melody (i’ll sing it loud) |Princessfbi @princessfbi (musician!buck/bodyguard!eddie/angsty)
hearts, hooves, and healing | mansikka @redlightsandicedtea (neither are firefighters/horse sanctuary/fluffy)
your name is written in the sand | lecornergirl @clusterbuck (lifeguard!buck/fluffy)
let my ink stain your pages |letmetellyouaboutmyfeels @letmetellyouaboutmyfeels (author!buck/detective!eddie/fluff & angst)
steppin' into fate | r_holland @onward--upward (hockey buddie/fluff & angst)
i don't mind waiting (if it's for you) | Princessfbi @princessfbi (detective!eddie/bartender!buck/angsty)
a picture is worth a thousand words (but love is undefinable) |extasiswings, letmetellyouaboutmyfeels @extasiswings @letmetellyouaboutmyfeels (model!buck/photographer!eddie)
teardrops could be bottled | Princessfbi @princessfbi (model!buck/photographer!eddie)
string of hearts...| ReallySmartLadyMarieCurie (plant shop owner buck/firefighter eddie/fluff)
what if you're someone i just want around... |ReallySmartLadyMarieCurie (boxer!eddie/firefighter buck/angsty)
pin me to the wall, i'm an art piece | whiskis @angela-feelstoomuch (models buddie/fluff & angst)
cowboys, jorts and building shit |Ineedapuppyandsomevodka (houseflipper!buck/carpenter!eddie/fluffy) @ineedapuppyandsomevodka
frequent flyer | whileyouresleeping @whileyoursleeping (eddie is a firefighter/buck is not/fluff)
coastlines | browney3dgirl6 (surfer-shopowner!eddie/firefighter buck/ agnsty) a lil self promo; i would list more but 99% of what i write is au's like this 😅 if you want me to make a separate post of all of them, just lmk 🫶🏻)
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arillusionist · 6 months
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grishaverse dashboard simulator
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🤯 conspiracy-theories follow
theory: the sun summoner is definitely still alive. all we know is that she “gave up her life to save ravka” but how? have YOU ever heard of a grisha dying from using their powers?? it just doesnt make sense.
🌝  ruinsruiners follow
Bitch shes a SAINT. All saints die. Move on lmao
🐺 awooga10384 follow
alina was different and u know it just bc she was a “saint” doesnt mean she had to die op is right and ur being an asshole get off their post
☀️ starkovers follow
not you calling her alina like you know her personally… put some respect on her name bruh
🐺 awooga10384 follow
wait til u find out not everyone is religious and ravkan and doesnt use sankta labels n shit
☀️ starkovers follow
the way i literally never even mentioned religion… the lack of reading comprehension on this site is insane
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⛴️ wraithupdates follow
Friendly reminder to DNI if you think the Wraith and D*rtyh*nds are together! We do not welcome you guys on this blog :)
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🌤️ saintlydays follow
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drew some fanart of sankta anastasia i hope you guys like it!! i drew her with a bleeding eye because shes the saint of sickness and when my mom was sick her eye started bleeding for like 2 days straight lol but i prayed to sankta anastasia and she made my mom get better even though her eye is permanently damaged and my sister and dad could not recover and they passed away after like 5 days of pain (we stabbed them to put them out of their misery)
#sankta anastasia #saint anastasia #saint #sankta #saints fanart #sankta fanart #sankta anastasia fanart #saint anastasia fanart
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🍺 giddyuphorsey follow
tired of yall stereotyping kerch as a dark and gloomy place… not all of us live in ketterdam or in the north in general. its extremely offensive to us so please fucking stop.
💎 ravkasbeauty follow
womp womp
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❓ grishapolls follow
🔥inferni-heart follow
Sturmhond is a privateer…
🧟‍♀ razorskull follow
who gaf
🔥inferni-heart follow
Shut up you dirty kerch ketterdam gang member money worshipping heathen 
🧟‍♀ razorskull follow
it was never that deep but okay..
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🦴 shadowsandbones follow
not trying to b racist or anything but why do grisha always act like they’re better than anyone else… and why doesnt anyone ever call them out…
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🦐 merchingaway follow
JUST FOUND OUT THAT WYLAN VAN ECK’S BOYFRIEND IS DIRTYHAND’S EX LMFAO WHATTTT
🫠 theseventhsoldier follow
guys im shu can someone please tell me that dirtyhands is not what i think it means… i keep seeing that name all over this app and im so confused
🦐 merchingaway follow
trust me its not but based on this new info…
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💣 boomboomboom follow
JUST TRIED A ZEMINI PIE FOR THE FIRST TIME MY LIFE IS FINALLY COMPLETE 💞💞💞💞💞💞
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🪴 green-skies follow
Funny how people keep hating on Kerch when Fjerda is RIGHT THEREE
💎 ravkasbeauty follow
as a heartrender whos grisha mom got captured by a fjerdan ship: womp womp
🧙🏾‍♀️ zowaaaa follow
also op is kaelish so like… why tf are they talking lmao
💎 ravkasbeauty follow
right!! also fjerdans are barely on the internet (too many grisha here for them lmao) so its not really funny bc they cant see it
☀️ starkovers follow
kerch on the other hand… most chronically online mfs i’ve ever seen
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vase-of-lilies · 11 months
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❀  Pairing: Dark!Mermaid!Wanda x Sailor!Reader
❀ Non-con, dubcon, Captivity, restraints, slight experimentation, shapeshifting! Wanda, the ocean, sailing on a boat, a storm, shipwreck, a little bit of violence, virgin!reader (she has never had a sexual encounter, period. So she is very innocent), Wanda doesn’t know human anatomy lol, oral (r receiving), forced orgasm, overstimulation, fingering, (this next part is major whump, so PLEASE heed the warnings) Sewing readers legs together for a punishment, holding reader under the water until they pass out, screaming, lots of screaming, making someone stay unconscious with telekinesis, quick acceptance, soft-ish wanda, some fluff, Stockholm syndrome, (if there is anything else PLEASE let me know!!)
❀ Disclaimer and Authors Note: The pictures only represent aesthetics and themes. There is no certain skin color, body type, ethnicity, or description other than Y/n and “you”. I hope you like this! The pictures go to their rightful owners on Pinterest, and the comic-style picture belongs to the beautiful artist Jenifer Prince. I also have a really big feeling that Mermaids' love language is gift-giving. Because… stuff is all they find lol!
This is for @eloquentreverie 's Dusk Till Dawn writing challenge! I chose the lines “All you are is a liar…” “My love for you is not a lie.”
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Bright rays of sunshine reflect off the water, not one cloud in the sky.  The perfect conditions for sailing. You had been planning this trip for ages, and the perfect time has never been seen before now. Packing your bags was an easy task, all that was left was prepping your boat. Aphrodite is what you call her. The beautiful sailboat your father had left for you.
The sails are off-white, the texture of a canvas. In a way, this boat is its own form of art, and the beautiful name that your father picked fits perfectly. She was small, livable, and durable. It could withstand the fiercest of storms, waves, and monsters. Monsters, that you at least think are real. They were all just myths your mother told you about. 
Mermaids that left trinkets on the helm of each ship they came across, an octopus-like creature pushing the boats in the wrong direction, and even the ocean itself; a lively source of nature that will always lead the way when these malicious creatures have any form of malicious intentions. 
Making your way down to the pier, you are stopped by a villager, an older woman who knew your father very well. “Y/n! Y/n! Come here, I have something for your travels!” You hear from her frail yet powerful voice. She gently grabs your hands and pulls you into her home, making you giggle softly as she sits you on her couch. 
“Now, I knew I would see you today because of the conditions out… there. I have this for you, wishing you safe travels and return.” She puts a dainty necklace in the palms of your hands. “It was a gift from your mother, she had told me to wait until you were older, and I think now would be the perfect time.” She smiles as you look at the beautiful oval-shaped locket. 
“My family and I really love you, Eleanor. Thank you for taking such good care of us.” You smile up at her, closing your fingers around the locket with a picture of both your mother and your father. “Thank you, really, for everything.” 
She shakes her head, “The only thing you owe me is a hug and a proper goodbye.” She says, opening her arms for you. You happily oblige, wrapping your arms around her hunched body. She was like a grandmother to you even when she was just a family friend, but you most definitely loved her as a grandmother. 
“I love you so much, and I will most definitely bring you some trinkets if mermaids ever leave anything for me.” She chuckles in response and waves you off, sending you on your way to uncertainty. 
Entering the deck of your boat was a feeling of freedom that you had longed to feel ever since the death of your parents. It was difficult to make it through the day without breaking down into your most vulnerable form; A sobbing, shaking mess. 
Standing at the helm brought mixed emotions. You were finally here. You were finally able to feel like the woman your mother described you as. “You are a brave, independent, beautiful girl Y/n. You will do amazing things one day. That may be tomorrow or ten years from now. But amazing things they will be.”
Those words stuck with you from the day she died. Those words were what drove you to sail alone after all these years. She told you that you were brave, and that was all it took to motivate you to learn, grow, and persevere in your passion for sailing. 
Now all you had to do was make sure you had enough food, water, and supplies in the cockpit, untie the sails, and mark the coordinates on your map. Once those subjects were taken care of, the last was to untie Aphrodite from the pier and raise the anchor and you are all good to go!
With the small gusts of winds every now and then, it would take about 6 to 7 hours for you to make it to your destination. That is if there is no storm, headwind, or pirates that you have to worry about. Crossing Captain Barnes is on your list of “most feared encounters” and you could not imagine getting stuck with him, let alone see him. Rumors say he lost his arm to the Kraken and used the gold from a found treasure to make a new arm. A much more dangerous one than he already had. 
The thought of seeing him gives you chills in of itself, so you decide to put your mind to something else. You begin to steer the boat in the direction of your destination, your blue navy-themed sailing dress your mother made you flowing in the wind. You smile as the smell of salt and cold water fills your nose, the ocean and wind guiding you in the right direction.
~~~~~~~~ 3 hours later ~~~~~~~~
The clouds had come out of nowhere, casting a large, dark shadow over Aphrodite. The wind was skin-biting and strong, the waves getting unruly as she becomes angry with something. What? You had no idea. You had prepared for this, but the worst thing that could happen happened. 
As you put on your dark blue cloak to keep warm, a large wave crashed over your boat. With much luck, Aphrodite held strong and pulled back up from the water. Raindrops soaked your clothes as well as waves that rolled over the surface of your boat. As you were pulling on the sails, you froze in fear. A colossal wave formed. Bigger than anything you have seen, towering over you. At this point, you knew your fate and you fully accepted it. 
As the wave crashed over your boat, the water engulfed you into a frigid and bitter hug. The sheer force of this wave cracked your beautiful boat in two, ripped the sails a part as if it was cut by scissors, and lastly shredded your near-perfect map to shreds. It was a saddening sight to see to anyone on the outside. 
As your vision fades to black, numbness takes over your system and you are finally at rest. 
Or so you thought. 
“Is she ok? She- Oh she’s breathing! She looks ok, just a little roughed up.” 
‘Squawk!’
“She’s a human! She’s beautiful, she looks so cute in this little dress of hers.”
‘Squawk!’
“Can we keep her?”
A pause…
“Let's bring her inside, but we have to make sure she doesn’t escape. Grab some of the rope from her boat, that will hold her.” 
“She scared? She scared?” The animal squawked. 
“For certain…”
The voices were faded and muffled, and you felt like you were held in a bubble. Everything was quiet. The voices were smooth, siren-like, minus the power. There was something dark in the woman’s voice that hovered over you. There was something in her voice that sounded almost… dark and evil. As if she had malicious intentions with you. 
Your eyes fluttered open at the sound of waves crashing against the sand, but you were not on the beach anymore. You were in a cave, a dark, cold, dreary cave. With a pounding in your head, you moved your hand to your temple. Well, tried to. You look to your left, letting your eyes get used to the darkness and you see rings of rope around your wrist, holding you to a rusty bed frame. Looking to your right you see the same.
Struggling was your first instinct, but you were frozen in place. It was fear taking over your body and you didn’t know what else to do. There wasn’t much you could do in your state. It was so cold, and you couldn’t find a way to get warm. 
“H-hello?” Your voice echoes in the abyss of the dark cave in front of you and you have yet to hear anything other than that. But moments later, other voices fill the cavern's echos. 
“I wonder when she will wake up, oh I sure hope it’s soon.” One voice said. Were they talking about me? You think to yourself. 
“Well, when she does, it will be quite the surprise don’t you think?” That voice, it was the voice that sounded evil… 
In an instant, the dark cave was filled with lowly lit torches. From what you could see was a room full of different trinkets, a makeshift vanity with a sea-glass mirror, shelf portions of the cave filled with sea shells, and lastly her.
A beautiful woman walks into the cave carrying what looks to be wood, sail rope, some canvas sails, and cloth. It took you a moment to realize that these were parts of Aphrodite. Your precious boat. 
“Ah, she’s awake.” The woman says to her accomplice, a parrot on her shoulder. 
“Awake! Awake! Awake! Awake!” The parrot responds, making the woman let out a soft chuckle. 
“Please, let me go!” You plead. 
“No, you are mine now and I get to do what I please,” She gives you a smug smile and sets her trinkets and shells down on her vanity. You watch her carefully, salty tears falling down your cheeks as you pull at the ropes around your wrists. “There is no coming out of those ropes, darling. I know how to tie a good knot” She emphasizes the ’t’, making you jump slightly in response. 
“Such a curious creature humans are. They move around on these water contraptions just to go see another piece of land. Can you imagine that?” She says, chuckling at her own question. “Well of course you can, you were doing just that!” She moves towards the makeshift seaweed and canvas bed and sits on the edge. 
“I have yet to see a real human up close and see what they are really like. How much pain and torture they can take, just like my sisters had to endure.” 
Her intentions scared you, and her smirk told you that she already knew that. “P-please don’t hur-” she cut you off with a laugh and a mockery of your fear. 
“Puh puh puh, please! Oh don’t be so cute, I love hearing screams of fear…” She leans close to your face, her tongue sliding against your cheek and picking up a tear. “Mmmm, tastes so good. I can’t wait to taste the rest of you.” You whimper as her eyes turn bright red and before you know it, the clothes are ripped from your body leaving you nude, cold, and exposed. You flail your feet attempting to kick her, but she quickly pins them down and wraps more rope around them, connecting them to the bed posts at the bottom.
She shakes her head at your action and gently slides her fingers over your now exposed belly, “Nuh uh, none of that. We don’t need anyone else to get hurt, right?” You shiver in response, making her smile grow even bigger. “Oh, so you feel me…” She realizes and she runs her fingers up your belly, and to the valley of your breasts. 
Your reactions are very minimal at first, but then she starts going in other directions. “Hmm, I have little buttons like these too, I wonder what yours do?” She moves and grazes her fingers over your nipple, making you shudder. A new feeling has come to you, and the woman takes note. “Ah, how interesting. This little bud of skin is much more sensitive than the skin over here…” She does the same motion of rolling her fingers but with just a small section of skin from your breast. 
“What if we do both?” She inquires, moving both her hands above your breasts. Taking both nipples in her fingers, she smiles at your reaction of curling in on yourself. The little noises you make are what set her off. “Wow, how amazing,” She whispers, smirking at your reaction. As you whine and shake your body slightly, you try to get her off of you, but she is just pulled towards you again. 
“Someone is a little feisty,” She slaps your breast harshly and you yelp in pain. She chuckles and stands up. “Now let me introduce myself. I am Wanda, and as you can see I take the shape of a human, like you. But I am nothing of the kind. I have morals.” She pauses, and moves between your spread-open legs. “When I got the ability to use my shapeshifting power, I first wanted to try to be human. Just to see what it feels like to walk and run. I liked it at first, but then came this feeling that I can’t describe. It is like a fire was lit right here,” she puts her hand just above your lower regions, goosebumps pebbling at the touch of her skin on yours.
“There was nothing I could do to put it out. So I explored down there… I have a button down there just like up here,” She rolls your nipples in her fingers once again, making you whine in protest. “Oh, my Poseidon… it felt heavenly when I rubbed it just right. I thought the feeling would never end! But then it did… it felt like I exploded. It was like getting caught in a wave, only to fall back down into warm water again.” She smiles down at you from her spot between your legs. 
“I want to see if you feel it too.” She smirks and you whimper as you pull at the restraints around your limbs. Dismissing you, her fingers spread your slick petals and she gently rubs around the top of your pussy. A soft moan emits from your mouth and she gasps. “Oh, I think I found your button too,” Wanda continues to rub your clit, loving every single reaction from your mouth. With curiosity, she pokes at your entrance with her fingers. When she enters her fingers into your wet cunt, the moan from your mouth is beautiful. 
“That was beautiful, I need to see more!” She exclaims and starts to move her fingers in and out of your hole while rubbing your clit. With never feeling these things before, you are like an exposed nerve and are oh, so, sensitive. 
You soon start to feel what she was describing, the fire, the riding up the wave, and after seconds, the falling from that wave and into warm water. As you cum, she smiles at the feeling of your walls clenching around her fingers. “It feels nice, doesn’t it…” she states, not addressing it as a question. You vigorously shake your head, denying her. She smirks, knowing deep down you absolutely love it. 
The ropes burn your limbs and you were tired. But Wanda was far from done. She had so much more planned as she was infatuated with your pussy and how it pulsed around her fingers. “Should we see how many more of these little episodes we can see today?” 
“N-no! No, please no more, I- I want to go home, please,” You beg, knowing deep down you most likely won’t make it out of here. Not without a fight. Already you were scheming how you could possibly escape her, but your thoughts were shut down as Wandas' fingers intruded your hole at a fast rate. Her fingers moved in and out of your cunt, a burning feeling bubbling inside of you once again. 
“Oh, you’re so wet down here, little one. I swear if I go too fast, there may be a tidal wave coming at me.” She smirks at her words, not slowing her pace as she curls her fingers in a ‘come hither’ motion. Your moans were music to her ears, like putting a sea shell to one's ear and hearing the beauty of the ocean on the other side. 
Failing miserably, you try to quiet your moans. But the feelings are just too intense for you to handle. She leans down as she continues to pump her fingers inside of you and smiles as she licks along your red, hot clit. Your legs jolt once a more sensitive wave of pleasure falls over you, her tongue moving expertly over your little bud. Your back arches as much as it can with the bonds keeping you down and you try to enjoy your current state under Wandas' domination. 
In a matter of seconds, you are crumbling at the feel of Wandas' three fingers inside of you as well as her tongue licking your clit over and over again. Cumming a second time was even more of an experience. You saw white as your orgasm came crashing over you once again. Whimpers come out of your mouth as tears are falling down your cheeks. It’s too much, and your cunt feels like it's on fire. 
Finally, Wanda has had enough, and she lets out a sigh as she looks down at your abused petals. “Aw, look how red you are. You must be so sensitive, hm?” She chuckles at your fucked out sounds as she grazes your clit with the back of a finger, your hips pulling away in retaliation. You whimper as she suddenly stands up, her other fingers leaving your hole in an instant. You shudder at the emptiness, letting out a sob as your emotions take control of your body again. 
“Sweetheart, don’t cry, we have just barely begun.” Her smile is malicious and full of evil. There is nothing welcoming about her smile, almost like the waxing gibbous, right before a full moon. Only a sliver of a smile of the night sky, then the werewolves come out. Her teeth were sharp but smooth enough to look human. But she was far from human.
You found out she was a mermaid while she let you roam the beach a little bit. All she gave you for clothing was a paper bag-type dress made out of the canvas of your sails, and a rope around your middle as a belt. She took the chains from the anchor of your boat and kept it around your ankle, the other end under a very heavy bolder that she moved with her powers. 
While you stayed on the beach, chained to the rock that gave you the shade you needed, Wanda was hunting. There was a little bit of forest above the cave you both took shelter in, but she warned you to never go in there. Well, not without her. You were curious as to know if there was danger, or if she just didn’t want you out of her sight. But it was easy to say, she did not want you going anywhere. 
Sitting on the beach was the little bit of freedom that you looked forward to every day. One hundred and eighty-two (182) days of being in Wandas' captivity. You learned on day seven (7) to never run away from her. She will make everything hurt. She will take everything away from you if you try to take yourself away from her. 
On day seven (7), you found a way to rub the chain links together and break the loop off of your foot. Making sure she was in the water, you made a run for it on the wet sand of the beach. Trying to go around the island and then out into the ocean was your goal. Wanda sensed you were gone the second the chain broke. It was no use trying to swim away from a mermaid. 
She caught up with you in a matter of seconds, her webbed tail making her swim much faster than you; A mere human. She grabbed your ankle from underneath the water, dragging you down to the ocean floor. Not too deep as she knows the pressure builds, but deep enough where you would not be able to escape. She smiled as you thrashed against her iron grip, your arms trying desperately to reach the surface, and the last few bubbles exited your mouth as you finally fell unconscious. 
Once you were out, she pulled you to the beach, getting the water from your lungs and making sure you are breathing again. She sent a wave of energy over your body, keeping you in an unconscious state. Picking you up, your head hung over her arm as your legs hung over her other arm. She looked at your sleeping face in slight disappointment as you were doing so good the few days before this. She knew that the time outside was going to be limited as part of the punishment she was going to give you. 
Laying you on the bed, she gathers a few trinkets she has found. Including a sewing kit. She looked over your body and stripped you of your canvas dress. She laced the rope around your arms and fastened them to the rusty bars above your head. Angrily, she stares, thinking of the things she is going to do to you when you wake up. She growls and pounces on top of you, grabbing your legs and putting them together. She takes more rope from your boat and wraps your thighs and ankles, rendering you unable to walk. 
Now comes the painful part; She threads the thread through the eye of the needle and pinches the skin of your thigh. Carefully she puts the needle through your skin, puncturing through the layers mercilessly. As she pulls the thread through the hole in your skin, she meticulously sews your legs together in an intricate zig-zag shape from your left leg to your right leg. Once she gets to just above the rope around your ankles she hums at her work, making sure that you won’t be able to pull the thread out of your legs, even if you tried as hard as you could. 
Waving her hand takes away the power keeping you unconscious, and she makes her way out of the cave, not wanting to hear your screams as you realize what she had done to you. Of course, she loved to hear you scream, but not in pain. It was never meant to be this way. If you had just listened and stayed where you were put, this never would have happened. As she transforms into her mermaid form, she dives into the ocean to cool off as she was much too angry to argue with you, worried she would kill you in the snap of a finger if you said the wrong thing to her. 
You started to come to, becoming more and more aware of your surroundings by the second. Once again, you tried to move, only to be stopped by the ropes around your wrists, but there was much more than what was done to you last time. You looked to the source of the tension of your legs and your panic set in. Screams of pain and horror echoed through the cave, tears and sobs were heard for miles outside of the cave, and Wanda was nowhere near where she could hear them. 
~~~~~~~
More than a few hours later, your sobs had calmed to nothing more than whimpers. Your legs were screaming in pain, blood dripping from each of the holes Wanda's needle had made, soaking the thread and keeping them together. You closed your eyes, hoping that someone would find you, help you, kill you. But your wishes were only met with more fear.
As Wanda entered the cave, she had a whole net of fish, more shells, and trinkets from the ocean floor, as well as the part of your ship you were going to miss the most: The picture of you, your father, and your mother. It was still in its gold-plated frame, the monotone black and white of the picture still prominent. “I brought you a couple things,” Wanda says, unapologetically. Setting the net down, she places a pink and coral-colored conch shell next to you on the bed, the picture, and what looks like a shell necklace that she put together herself. 
You did not acknowledge her in the slightest. From the moment she walked into the cave, to the moment she begged you to talk to her. She even untied your arms and helped you sit up, but you didn’t say a word. In a fit of rage, she throws your body against the bed, letting you curl against yourself as you try to undo the thread. 
“It's not going to come off. I put a spell on it, and until you talk to me, it will stay that way. Do you understand?” She holds your chin in her hands, her sharp nails digging into your soft, beautiful skin. You whimper in response, tears pooling in your eyes. A few fall, but Wanda is quick to wipe them away as you look up at her. She gives you a soft smile and your brows furrow. This smile is different, it's out of pity, and out of a different type of intent. “Please, say something…” She whispers, tears of her own filling her eyes.
“Wh-why did you do this to me?” You whimper, pulling your hands away from the thread and to your chest to cover yourself. 
“Because you ran away… I told you to stay here, and you disobeyed me. This never would have happened if you just stayed, and enjoyed the sun like I so generously allowed you!”
Her eyes close, and she covers them with her hand. As she removes her hand, she sits down on the bed and her eyes soften as she looks at you. “I never wanted this to happen, love. You are mine, but I never wanted to hurt you.” 
"All you are is a liar..." You respond, with no emotion in your voice, eyes, or heart. Wanda sighs and helps you sit up once again. 
“My love for you is not a lie.” She says, moving to the floor as your legs drape over the side of the bed. She unties your thighs and ankles, her hands glowing a soft red color. Your legs lose feeling for only a moment, and you watch in awe as the thread is removed without pain or discomfort. It floats out of your skin, and the holes where it once was were closed. “Please forgive me, my little human. I won’t do this unless you make me angry. You won’t be punished if you don’t do something punishable. Do you understand me?” 
You nod softly as the feeling returns to your legs. You stand up, as does Wanda. You stumble at first, but you slowly make your way out of the cave and over to the rock where your chain lay. You wrap the chain around your ankle and hold it up for Wanda to seal with her magic. She looks at you, confused. 
“What are you doing?” She asks. 
You sigh and you hold up your foot again. “Im showing you I can be good. That I can keep a promise of being good.” She understands and seals the lock over the two open links. You stand up again, and you make your way to the water. You have already accepted the fact that will rip the dress off of you when you get back inside anyway, so you stand in the sun, bathing in the warmth as you stand nude. You are grateful that the chain grants you the length to reach the water. 
The waves make you sway slightly, and you close your eyes. Your destiny has proven itself, and you were to stay captive with Wanda. 
Soon enough, day three hundred sixty-five (365) hits and you are smiling with Wanda. Happily letting her devour you every night to her heart's desire, as well as shower you with gifts and jewels she finds on her hunting trips. In a form of trust, you both agree to a collar around your neck. One that claims you as well as keeps you on the island when Wanda is away. It was a way for Wanda to make sure you were safe, and a way for you to feel secure in someone's watch. And if any pirates come to the island, it would notify Wanda if you were in danger. 
She loved to see you in the sun, the jewels around your neck shimmering in the bright sunlight above you. A bright ruby right at the center of your neck, represents the love that Wanda has gifted upon you. Every morning when you woke up in her arms, you felt safe and sound, and no longer in danger of her. Of course, you were never going to make it home to Eleanore, so you threw a bottle with a letter in it into the ocean hoping that it finds her well. 
Yours and Wandas' routine grew every day, her even letting you go for a swim. She would transform into her mermaid form, and you would hold onto her shoulders as she sped through the water at speeds you have never felt before. On other days, she would take you to the edge of the forest above her cave. She told you stories of the cannibals that lived among the trees but willingly agreed to keep on their side of the island and never venture past the river about a mile into the grove of trees. 
You would tell stories of when you sailed with your father and cooked with your mother. Wanda loved to hear about humans and the hobbies or skills you can acquire with the right supplies and practice. She was infatuated with humans just as she was with you. 
One of your favorite things to do with Wanda was lay out on the sand at night, a soft seaweed blanket underneath you both, the water reflecting the moon, and the stars shimmering above you. For every shooting star there was, you would point to it and give Wanda a soft kiss on her cheek, making her smile and return the kiss. That was a nightly ritual you both had and when the both of you had soaked up the moonlight for the perfect amount of time, she would take you inside and make love to you. She would worship you, and care for you. She gave you meaning in a world where you had no one else to be there for. 
She loved you.
Your keeper loves you, yet you love her too.
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imaginespazzi · 4 months
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Part 2: If Only You'd Been Here
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Masterlist - Part 1 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5 - Part 6 - Part 7
Ain't nobody hurt you like I hurt you (but ain't nobody love you like I do)
(In which a sadistic writer tortures her beloved ship a fair amount and maybe her readers too)
Pairing: Paige Bueckers X Azzi Fudd
Themes: Angst, Pining, Hurt/Comfort and maybe Fluff if you squint
Words: 6.5K (someone please be proud that it is in fact shorter 🙈)
TW: Swearing, Alcohol, Injuries, Alludes to Sexual Content
A/N: Good morning my lovelies <3 Just a couple of things I changed that you should know before you read. If you follow WCBB, you know UCLA didn't win the Pac-12 tournament in 2023 but in this universe they did. You also probably know they lost in the NCAA tournament last year to SC in the Greenville region but in this universe, for plot purposes, they're gonna be in the Seattle region. I kept their seeding and who they were playing vague because it was gonna get too complicated to figure out. Also if you saw my list of part titles a while ago, no you didn't lol. As always, feel free to know what you liked, what you didn't, and anything you'd like to see in future parts. And as you're reading, let's just remember y'all love me and everything I do is for the plot. Happy reading and have a wonderful week lovelies!
December 2022
The distinctly “car” smell of her car is starting to make Paige more than a little nauseous. Going by the way Drew is pouting in the passenger seat, he’s also clearly over it. They’ve been driving in circles for what feels like hours. At first, still enamoured with being allowed to sit in the front, her little brother had gone along with her ridiculousness. Now, as they approach maybe the 12th or so lap around the neighbourhood, he seems less than thrilled. 
“Alright let me out and you keep driving,” Drew says, fiddling agitatedly with his seatbelt, “I think I’m gonna puke.”
“Well hold it in,” Paige retorts unhelpfully as they re-round the block. She keeps her eyes focused on the road, ignoring the glare her brother sends her away. He takes in a dramatic breath and leans back onto his seat. She grips the steering wheel tighter as they pass the house again, still not brave enough to pull into the driveaway of a place she’d once considered just as much a home as her own. 
Drew lets out another groan, “I shoulda just stayed home.”
“Well you didn’t-” Paige’s reply is cut off by the sound of a phone call reverberating around the car. The CallerID reads “Azzi (DON’T YOU DARE IGNORE)”, a name the younger girl had plugged in herself with a warning look the day Paige had left LA. Chewing whatever dry skin is still left on her bitten-to-death lips, Paige clicks accept on the call. 
“What number lap is this?” comes Azzi’s exasperated voice and Paige can’t help the smile that creeps onto her face. 
“Oh you know my car’s feeling the need to exercise today,” Paige hums back, suddenly feeling a lot lighter than she had just a couple of seconds ago. Sometimes, she’s not sure how she managed to go a year with this constant heavy weight pressing down on her ribs, and no Azzi to slowly ease her out from under it. 
“Azziiiiii,” Drew whines dramatically, “please come save me. I’m gonna die in this car.”
Affronted, Paige splutters, “nobody forced you to come.”
“You begged me to come,” her young brother quips back and it elicits a laugh from the girl on the other end of the line. 
“I did-”
“Paige,” Azzi cuts her off, “just come inside okay? You’re wasting gas for nothing.”
“I- it’s just-,” Paige’s hands tighten even more around the wheel, as she stops on the sidewalk, switching on her turn signal, but still not entering the driveway. She leans her head against the wheel, overwhelmed by emotions she can’t quite name. Drew places a comforting hand on her back and she sends him a reassuring smile, trying to shield her younger brother from the havoc in her brain. 
“Hey,” Azzi’s voice floats through the fog, “it’s just me okay? Me and you and us. It’ll be okay. I promise.”
It’s like a child being soothed with their favourite binkie, that’s what Azzi’s promise feels like to Paige. She finally turns into the driveaway, and both Drew and Azzi cheer in tandem. The knot in her chest loosens just a little bit at that because the large crowds that scream for her make her feel adored, but this, her own personal cheer squad for her littlest of achievements, well it makes her feel loved. 
“Freedom,” Drew yells as he practically flings himself out of Paige’s barely parked car. She rolls her eyes fondly at her mini me as he dramatically pretends to kiss the ground. It’s a small distraction from the memories that are swirling like a tornado in her mind. Minnesota is home, it’ll always be home but this place, this had been her safe haven, something she could hold onto at a time where everything else was slipping out of her hands. And then, like a fool, she’d let go of it. 
The door opens even before they’ve made it halfway to the door and Azzi’s brothers run out into the front yard. Jon pretends to take pictures and José practically falls to his knees as they swarm around the blonde. 
“Paige, Paige, can we get a picture or an autograph please,” they yell teasingly, “please Miss Bueckers we’re your biggest fans.”
“Move over boys,” Tim Fudd’s booming voice hollers, as he swats his children away, “her biggest fan is actually me eh Paige?”
The girl in question nods solemnly, her smile stretching the full length of her face, and both Jon and José let out a groan as their father beams at Paige. And then Katie’s there, not a hint of anything but pure happiness on her face as she wraps the younger girl into a hug. Paige melts into the embrace, trying her hardest not to burst into tears. Because all she can think about is the hundreds of calls and texts from Azzi that she’d left unanswered, all she can think of is Azzi's devastated face as she’d told Paige about just how hard she’d tried and that wretched ache of i don’t deserve this i broke your daughters heart wraps itself around Paige’s  heart. 
Over Katie’s shoulder, Paige watches as Azzi finally walks out into the law, her cheeks immediately turning red from the cold. The younger girl winks at Paige with a radiant smile, before giving all her attention to Drew who almost trips as he excitedly launches himself into Azzi, tiny hands wrapping around her waist. Paige watches, still buried in the warmth of Katie’s arms, as Drew animatedly tells Azzi all the stories he possibly can and Azzi nods along emphatically as if she’s being told the most important facts of her life. And Paige takes a snapshot of it to add to her ever growing collection of moments i just knew. 
***
January 2023
“Call her.”
Paige doesn’t bother replying, burying her face further into her tear-soaked pillow. Maybe if she ignores her teammate, Caroline will get the message and go away. The earth-shattering pain that she’d subdued for the last couple of months had finally reared its ugly head. And that too at the worst time possible, when her team needed to be a source of strength and with cameras catching the teardrops falling as she mourned the loss of not being able to play in the epic UConn-Tennessee rivalry. She’d done so well at holding it in, breaking apart only a couple of times, sometimes alone and sometimes with Azzi on the other end of the line. Until tonight, when the bright lights and roaring crowd had reignited the itch to just fucking play ball. 
“Paige,” Caroline says again, “stop being stubborn and call her.”
“She has a game tomorrow, she doesn’t need my dramatic ass worrying her right now,” Paige replies, getting into a sitting position when she realises the other girl isn’t about to just let this go. 
“You’re eventually going to call her. The two of you haven’t gone one day without talking to each other since this summer,” Caroline gives her a look, a hint of a smirk play on her face when it tints Paige’s cheeks pink, “seriously, just call her.”
It’s not that Paige doesn’t want to. She’d scrolled through her contacts and stopped at Azzi’s one too many time’s tonight. And each time, just as her fingers had hovered over the green call button, she’d felt guilt claw at her neck. Since she’d shown up in LA, Azzi had shown up for Paige every step of the way, checking in regularly, listening to Paige vent her anger at the world and whispering words of comfort that only sounded true when they came from Azzi’s mouth. Sometimes, if she tries really hard, Paige can feel the ghost of Azzi’s arms wrapping themselves around her shoulders, just as they had that one night in LA when Azzi had held her, so delicately as if she was made of porcelain, through the worst of her breakdowns. 
“She needs to focus on her game,” Paige says after a moment. 
Caroline sighs, mind wandering to the countless texts on her phone from Azzi begging her to take care of Paige and to let her know when the blonde wasn’t doing okay, “I know but she’d want you to call her if she knew. You need her.”
“And where was I when she needed me?” it’s the word need that triggers it, the quick snap because it’s all Paige has been able to think about lately. 
Without basketball, she’d had far too much time on her hands and she’d ended up going down a spiral of watching Azzi’s games from her freshman year, something she’d religiously avoided doing when they had happened live. At first, it had just been this immense feeling of pride, seeing her best friend be the college basketball phenomenon Paige had always known she would be. She’d shoved away the envy of it was supposed to be us that immersed her seeing the way the Bruins celebrated their new star player, and just let herself be happy in her best friend’s happiness. 
And then something changed around at the beginning of January 2022. It had only lasted a couple of games, but Azzi had hit a wall. Threes were short, cuts were made at the wrong time and she kept on getting lost on defence in a way that was very unlike her. And all Paige could focus on, eyes glued to the screen, was how completely and utterly exhausted Azzi looked during that stretch, despite the fact that she’d just come back from winter break. The smile had vanished off her face, replaced by stress lines Paige wished she could go back in time and erase. 
It wasn’t until she’d binged through all the games, cheering silently as Azzi slowly returned to form, that the realisation had hit Paige. She’d been slapped with the memory of a store decorated brightly for Christmas and a familiar voice calling her name, as she’d purposely walked the other way, pretending she hadn’t heard and the more than deserved i’m done trying text that had followed right after. For a year, perhaps longer, Paige had convinced herself that she was the only one who had lost something, she was the only one who had a right to hurt, to break. And still, she thinks she’d take all of that pain again a thousand times, if it means she could erase the fact that in all of her self-pity, she’d broken Azzi too.
“Where was I when she needed me?” she repeats again to Caroline, as the brunette stares at her in confusion, “the answer to that Carol, is that I was anywhere but with her.”
Caroline’s eyes soften in realisation as she takes a cautious step towards Paige, “oh P don’t do this to yourself.”
“I want to call her,” Paige confesses in a whisper, tears brimming in her eyes, “it’s the only thing I’ve wanted to do all day and maybe- maybe I should have but I’m just- I’ve been so unfair to her.”
“You were hurt Paige.”
“I know- I know that. But so was she. You don’t- god Carol- you don’t even know the things I said to her before she left for LA. And she’s still here,” the first tears fall from her blue eyes, and then the next and the next until there’s a steady waterfall streaming down her face, “you know I almost didn’t let her in when she first came over this summer?”
Caroline doesn’t say anything, choosing instead to come sit next to Paige and wrap her arms around the point guard. 
“I didn’t answer her calls or her texts for a year and still, still she’s picked up every call, replied to every text I’ve sent her since summer. I know- I know I need her and she’s going to be there of course she is. But when she needed me, where was I?” Paige drops her face into her hands, “I just- I don’t deserve her.”
There’s a moment of silence as Caroline rubs Paige’s back and lets the older girl wallow in her guilt. And then she reaches for Paige’s phone on the nightstand, ignoring the little grunt of protest. When the screen lights up, there’s already a notification of new messages from Azzi and Caroline can’t help but smile. 
“I think,” she begins softly, “Azzi’s a smart girl so maybe give that tiny little brain of yours a little bit of rest and let her decide who deserves her,” she hands Paige her phone “let her be there for you. I think maybe she needs that too.”
Caroline gives Paige’s shoulders a little squeeze before heading out the doors, giving the older girl a moment of privacy. Paige sighs, getting herself comfortable against her pillows, and rubbing away her tears, before finally giving in and pressing the facetime call button. 
“Do you want a distraction or do you want to talk about it?” Azzi says as soon as she picks up and Paige can see the concern etched all over her face.
“Or maybe I’m perfectly fine?”
“Ah we’re playing the pretend game tonight. Should have cleared your throat for a second longer maybe Miss Perfectly Fine, your eyes are red as fuck and you sound like a dying cat.” 
“Wow, that was rude. Maybe I’m sick?” 
“With what? The “lies to her best friend” flu?”
“That UCLA education has you making up illnesses now? Damn Az, you’re supposed to get smarter in college.”
“You’re so funny, like so funny,” Azzi huffs sarcastically before they both dissolve into giggles. It’s always just been so easy with them. And Paige’s isn’t a poet, but if she was, she’d write sonnets about the sound of Azzi’s laughter, and the way it makes the corner of her eyes crinkle. 
“I watched the game,” Azzi says after a second, “and I saw you.”
Paige smirks, “so you didn’t actually watch the game, just stared at my gorgeous face the whole time?”
“There’s that comedian streak of yours again.”
“Hey you’re the one who said you were watching me instead of the game. But who could blame you really?”
“I didn’t-” Azzi rolls her eyes, as Paige’s cocky smirk deepens, “stop it.”
“You can admit I’m a pretty girl Az,” she teases, delighted when it makes the younger girl blush. 
“Fuck off, you have enough people telling you you’re a pretty girl.”
“Yeah but it means more coming from you,” she says quietly, biting her lip. It’s not the kind of thing you’re supposed to say to your best friend, at least not in the soft, wanting way that Paige says it. Except they both know that the lines in their friendship are far more blurred than they should be, even if they've both done a pretty fantastic job at ignoring that kiss. Paige had learned over Christmas that Azzi was exceptionally good at the pretending part, moving away the moment Paige’s hands lingered a little longer than they should, changing topics if they even got anywhere near addressing the something between them. It shouldn’t have hurt but it did and Paige doesn’t understand how she can so desperately miss something that she never even had in the first place. 
“So distraction then?” Azzi says after a second, changing the subject back to her initial question. 
Paige closes her eyes, taking in a deep breath, “it was just- it was a lot tonight. I didn’t realise I was being that obvious.”
“You weren’t. I just know you a little too well.”
“These are my favourite types of games, you know. The rivalry, the crowd booing my name and getting the chance to quiet them, that’s- that’s the type of game players live for and I just- I miss it Azzi. I miss shooting, I miss defending, I miss just standing on the fucking court sometimes. I miss playing basketball. So. Fucking. Much,” a fresh set of tears leak out of Paige's eyes, as her free hand fists at her bedsheets. 
There’s silence as Paige’s words linger in the air. In a way it’s freeing to be able to say it out loud, to just let herself feel how she feels instead of fighting them. 
“You’re gonna miss it every day until you play again,” Azzi says quietly, her own voice thick with emotions, “and it’s not really gonna get easier until you get it back. But when you finally do, just- just imagine it okay, your first game back. The feeling of the crowd. Dribbling up the court. Making that first shot as everybody loses their minds. Finally just playing the game you love. That’s when that feeling of loss will finally go away.”
Using Azzi’s steady breathing as an anchor to still her erratic heartbeat, Paige lets herself get lost in the picture the younger girl has just painted for her. She lets her mind run to the future that lies ahead of her and if she focuses hard enough she can almost hear the Gampel crowds roaring as she finally returns to the court. 
“It’s kinda really fucking annoying how you always know what to say,” no it isn’t, it’s the only thing that’s keeping Paige going these days. 
“Surviving an ACL injury will do that to a girl,” Azzi says with a pained smile. 
That’s not it Paige thinks, it’s not experience, it’s you and I really wish you were here. But she can’t say that, so she changes the subject instead. 
“Tell me about your game tomorrow.”
They both settle back into their pillows, getting into more comfortable positions. Azzi tells Paige all about her upcoming game and then moves onto another topic, then another and another and another. They’ll wake up tomorrow morning to phones that died and no memory of when they’d fallen asleep. And then they’ll remember who was on the other end of the line, and if that makes them smile a little too hard, well that’s just another thing they’ll pretend didn’t happen. 
***
March 2023
It’s only natural that when Paige finally feels like she can learn to live with just having a little bit of Azzi, that the world would show her just how wrong she could be. She’s been in a much better headspace these days, her knee finally starting to feel like itself again, bit by bit. The guilt of not being able to help her team is still settled into the pits of her stomach but even with that, she’s reached a sort of acceptance. And while she’s still struggling to fight the part of her heart that wants so much more, she’s learning to be content with just having her best friend back.
It’s that little bit of time in between conference tournaments and the NCAA tournament when it feels like the calm before the storm and it’s the first weekend since before the season that the UConn team finally gets to go out and let loose for a bit. They’re riding the height of winning another Big East title and even if it’s a little bittersweet that they did it without her, Paige is beyond the moon happy for her team. 
She turns up the music in her room and changes the lights for the sake of a little ambience, before sitting down at her desk, to call Azzi and do what little of her makeup she knows how to do. Normally she’d get one of the other girls or Kayla to do it, but she’d rather sacrifice a flawless makeup look then miss out on having Azzi tease her about how she still didn’t quite know how to do her eyeliner properly yet. 
The fact that it takes Azzi longer than the third ring to pick up should be Paige’s first warning sign but instead she’s sucking in a deep breath at the sight of her best friend who looks breathtakingly beautiful tonight. Paige’s heart stutters as she takes in Azzi’s face, the light layer of red lipstick (that Paige wants to kiss off), the blush-tinged cheeks (that Paige wants to caress delicately) and the perfectly done mascara on her eyelashes (that Paige wants to feel flutter against her own skin). 
She lets out a low appreciative whistle, “celebrating that Pac-12 championship in style huh?”
“Something like that,” Azzi bites her lip and really that should have been warning sign number two, “was there- was there something you needed?’
“I can’t just call you?” Paige asks, noticing the tension on Azzi’s face, “are you busy?”
“No it’s not-”
“She is actually,” a different voice cuts in aggressively and Azzi immediately gives whoever it is an exasperated look. Paige doesn’t know who it is, but she guesses it’s one of the UCLA players. It’s no secret they aren’t huge fans of her. They’d made that much clear the few times they’d met Paige during September, always regarding her with a wary eyes. It wasn’t their fault really, Paige understood their protectiveness, in fact she appreciated it more than they would ever understand. 
“Chill Angela.” 
“Are you not busy then?” the other voice who Paige assumes is Angela Dugalic says, clearly a little annoyed. And then Azzi’s phone is being shifted away from her and instead it’s Angela’s face that covers Paige’s screen. 
“Oh,” the blonde manages to get out, taken aback by the sudden change, “hi Angela.”
“Hi Paige,” the other girl says, her voice dripping with saccharine sweetness. 
“Angela,” there’s a clear warning in Azzi’s voice and Paige already knows, even before the words are let out into the open, that whatever Dugalic is about to say is going to tear her apart. 
“Azzi has a date tonight,” Angela pronounces the last words with a gleeful lilt. 
The world spins and Paige’s head spins with it, as she grips onto her desk for some semblance of stability. She can hear Azzi spluttering in the background as she tries to get her phone back but it’s of no use as the UCLA forward powers on. 
“With a really pretty girl,” Angela smirks at the camera, clearly trying to prove something, “Zoe’s really wonderful. You’d like her, Paige.”
Zoe. Recognition registers in Paige’s brain. She remembers seeing the name flashing on Azzi’s phone a couple of times, accompanied by a photo she never quite caught a glimpse of. But as she tended to do with most phone calls that came during her time with Paige, Azzi had simply just declined the call and texted whoever that she’d call her back later. And so Paige hadn’t really bothered caring about Zoe, chalking her up to being some random friend Azzi had made. But fuck, maybe she should have cared. 
“And Azzi really likes her I think. They’ve been tiptoeing around it for ages you know? But we all knew it was only a matter of time.”
A strangled noise escapes Paige’s throat and she tries her best to disguise it as anything but the cry of despair it is. It feels like there’s a thousand knives digging into her skin, pressing harder and harder until she has no blood left to bleed. 
“They’re gonna make the cu-”
“Give me my phone back Angela,” Azzi’s voice cuts in harshly and Paige hurriedly rushes to contort her features into a smile right before the camera’s back to facing her best friend. 
“So you’re all dressed up for a date then?” Paige manages to get out and the word date sounds like bile on her tongue. 
“Doesn’t she look lovely?” comes Angela’s voice again; the girl seemingly on a mission to break Paige as much as possible, “give her a proper look Az.”
“Angela,” Azzi hisses through gritted teeth. 
“N-no show me the fit,” Paige counters, because that’s what a best friend’s supposed to say right? Show me how fucking perfect you look for a girl that’s not me
Azzi hesitates, swallowing nervously, before she takes a couple of steps back so the camera captures all of her. And Paige wishes she’d never asked to be shown in the first place, hell she wishes she’d never bothered to call tonight. Because she thinks the image of Azzi’s casual light blue jeans and simple green off-the shoulder top will be etched in her mind forever, captioned with the words not for you. 
“You look lovely Azzi,” she whispers quietly, trying to keep her voice steady.
“Zoe won’t be able to keep her fucking hands off of you,” Angela supplies and this time the glare Azzi shoots her is murderous. 
“I think I hear Emily calling your name Angela.”
“I don’t-”
“Yes,” Azzi says pointedly, “yes you do.”
Angela rolls her eyes but doesn’t protest this time. She turns to the phone with a devilish grin, clearly feeling accomplished in being a menace, “nice talking to you Paige.”
She waltzes out, leaving Paige, Azzi and a silence that feels like it could drown them. 
“You could have told me,” the blond says after a second, averting her eyes from the screen, “aren’t dates the kind of thing best friends are supposed to tell each other?”
“Paige-”
“It’s good though- you-uh- you deserve a night out.”
“P-”
“Listen, I uh- I’m going out too so- I- umm- I better get going but-,” Paige takes in a deep breath, “have a- have wonderful time on your date Az.”
She hangs up before Azzi can reply, the concern in the younger girl's eyes becoming too much to bear. For a moment, she stares straight ahead at the wall, just processing. And then she lets herself fall apart. 
***
It’s 1 a.m., Paige is drunk and miserable and so fucking tired; it’s an extremely dangerous combination. Aaliyah and Amari had practically had to carry her to her dorm because she’d been stumbling far too much and everyone was worried she’d eventually fall flat on her face. Personally, Paige thought they just didn’t have enough faith in her. She wasn’t even that drunk, she couldn’t be. After all she could still feel that stupid Azzi-sized scar on heart and wasn’t the whole point of being drunk supposed to be not being able to feel? But she has to be drunk because sober her would know better than to do what she does next, would know better than to call Azzi when she has no control over herself. 
“Paige? Is everything okay? Are you okay,” Azzi’s voice is filled with concern when she answers.
“Azziiiii,” Paige slurs, “areyoustillwithyourdate?”
“What?”
“Are. you. still. with. your. date?” Paige pronounces each word slowly. 
“I- yeah. She’s in a different room. Paige, are you okay?” 
“Interesting,” the blonde remarks quietly, “you never picked up her calls when you were with me. And we weren’t even dating.”
She hears Azzi’s breath hitch on the other end, can almost picture her doing that nervous swallow of hers, “ I just want to make sure you’re okay.”
“You didn’t care if she was okay then? Those times she called you?”
“That’s not- she didn’t call me at 1 a.m.” the younger girl justifies hollowly. 
“Bullshit,” Paige scoffs, “1 a.m. isn’t even that fucking late. Why is it so hard for you to admit you care about me waaaayyyyy more than you care about Zara or whatever?”
“Zoe. You’re drunk Paige, go to bed,” and Paige really should listen to the edge in Azzi’s voice.
“Where did y’all go?” she asks lightly, changing the subject, “c’mon Az, best friends share their date stories right?”
“Baltaire,” Azzi relents, choosing to let this battle go. 
“Oooh that restaurant we passed that one time wow,” Paige coos, “too fucking bad you hate fine dining huh? But she wouldn’t know that now would she? Because she doesn’t fucking know you.”
“Paige please,” Azzi breathes out quietly in a pained voice.
“But you know who does know you? Me. And I would have never taken you to some boring old fancy ass piece of shit restaurant like that.”
“Don’t-”
“I would have taken you on a picnic. Do you remember that park you loved, the one by my air bnb? There, that’s where I would have taken you. And I’d have gotten you supermarket sushi even though I fucking hate that shit but I know, I know, you like it. And flowers. Did she get you flowers? Because I- I would have. Roses and peonies and lilies, a whole fucking bouquet.”
And Paige is crying again, for the second time tonight, one hand gripping at her phone as the other one tries to wipe away the frantically falling teardrops. 
“And we’d stay at that park til the sun goes out and I’d take a polaroid of you in the sunset and I’d keep it forever. I swear Azzi, I’d keep it forever and I’d put it on my wall.”
“Paige,” Azzi whispers, as if it’s the only word she knows, as if it’s the only word that matters. 
“I’d bring my laptop so that when it finally gets dark, we can watch a movie. You choose Az, whatever you want. And I’d get distracted and start playing with your hair or something and you’ll pretend it’s annoying you but you’d be smiling. Fuck I love your smile.”
“You can’t- you can’t just say these things Paige.”
“Why not? It’s the truth right- why can’t I say the truth?,” Paige says petulantly, “but hush okay I’m not- I’m not finished yet. And then, then we’d just lie under the stars and it'd just be you, me and the sky. Perfect.” 
Azzi lets out a broken sob and Paige hates it, she hates it but she keeps on talking. 
“And then I’d take you home and I’d kiss you,” she whispers the last bit like a confession, “everywhere. Fuck, I’d make it so good for you Az. So good. Everything you wanted, everything you needed, I’d give you all of it. I’d make you come apart on my fingers and then my tongue-”
“Shut up,” Azzi’s voice is suddenly cold and frosty and it feels like all the heat has been sucked out of Paige’s room as well, “shut up, shut up, shut up.”
“Azzi-”
“No,” Azzi all but yells, “you don’t get to say all of that to me.”
“Then who does? Her? Zia or whatever? Who the fuck even is she?” Paige spits out venomously.
“Zoe. Her name is Zoe and you wanna know she is Paige?” 
She should say no. She should apologise for interrupting Azzi’s date and hang up the phone, but no, Paige doesn’t do any of that, “enlighten me why don’t you.”
“She’s the girl who was there,” Azzi says, her voice cracking, “she’s the girl who held me last year when I was going through the worst time of my life. She was there when I couldn’t make a fucking shot and I thought maybe I’d never be good enough. She was there when I let the pressure and the media and all of it get to my head. She was there when I was crying my eyes out over losing the one person I was sure would always stay. She- she’s who you were supposed to be because she was there, and you weren’t.”
Paige isn’t sure if it’s the bitterness behind Azzi’s words or the brokenness of her sobs that is the reason for the ache in her own chest. All she knows is that she still remembers tearing her ACL, and she doesn’t think it hurt as much as this. 
“It was supposed to be you,” Azzi sniffles, “I wanted it to be you. Because I’d have let you- fuck- Paige- I’d have let you take me on a picninc and if you brought me sushi I’d have brought you your favorite mac and cheese. I- I know you don’t really care about flowers so I’d get you chocolate, the rum-filled ones that you love. And that sunset polaroid would have been a selfie of us, where you’re kissing my cheek and I’d have it framed. I’d pick out a movie but first- first you could watch whatever basketball game was on and you’d get exasperated when I don’t know the team because I’m literally a basketball player,” she lets out a wet laugh, “but I know you secretly like explaining the NBA to me. And then- then I’d have let you take me home and I’d let you take everything. Whatever you wanted, it’d be yours.”
The vivid image of a date that never happened fills every inch of Paige’s brain. She feels like she’s in a bad dream, trying so hard to reach for a happiness that keeps on evading her grasp. 
“But you weren’t there then Paige, and you aren’t here now.” 
“Azzi-” Paige chokes out. 
“Go to bed Paige,” the younger girl says, her voice shaky but adamant, ‘Get some sleep. Maybe you’re drunk enough that you won’t remember this when I call you tomorrow.”
“Right. So we’re gonna pretend this never happened. Again. We’ll just keep on pretending forever I guess,” Paige retorts bitterly. 
“Yes, we will. Because if I stop pretending, I don’t think I’ll be able to survive.”
***
The buzzer rings around Climate Pledge Arena as the UCLA women’s basketball team loses in the Elite 8 on a last second buzzer beater. Azzi’s face contorts into one of sheer disappointment, and in the stands, Paige feels her own heart drop. She’s not one to root for a team outside of her own and god knows what would happen if Nika found out that she’d been screaming her head off each time the Bruins, or at least one specific Bruin, scored, but for Azzi, well, there’s not many of her own rules that Paige follows when it comes to her best friend. 
It had taken a fair amount of convincing on Paige’s part to even be able to come to this game. Everyone had wanted to leave immediately after the Sweet 16 loss but Paige had insisted they needed to stay in Seattle, do something to get the team’s mind off of the terrible end to their season. And that wasn’t a complete lie because even if she hadn’t been able to help when they needed it on the court, she could try and help boost morale. But she knew her teammates weren’t fooled. They knew the schedule just as well as she did and they knew exactly what or better yet, who she wanted to stay for. 
On the court, Paige can tell Azzi’s fighting back tears. The brunette had given it her all, scoring an efficient 34 points and really the game could have gone any way. That last minute heave from the opposing team really probably shouldn’t have gone in, but at the end of the day the NCAA tournament was a lot about skill but also a little about luck. But Paige knows, Azzi isn’t thinking about any of that, too busy finding a way to blame herself even though she’d had a near perfect night. They were just too similar sometimes. 
Azzi’s eyes flicker through the stands, clearly looking for a familiar face. Paige resists the urge to run on to the court and pull the younger girl into her arms and soothe away the defeated look in her eyes, if only for the fact that Azzi doesn’t actually even know she’d figured out a way to stay back for this game. Despite being in the same city, they hadn’t been able to spend nearly as much time together and while Paige’s teammates had tried to be of some help, Azzi’s teammates had seemed determined to pull her away as much as possible. All of that on top of the fact that they’re still playing that stupid game of pretend had left Paige wanting for just one moment alone for the two of them. 
As soon as the UCLA team starts heading back to their locker room, and the crowd starts leaving, Paige scurries towards where she knows Azzi will be. Their assigned locker room isn’t that far from where UConn’s had been and Paige gets there in almost record time, her mind firmly planted on being there for Azzi. She’d missed so many opportunities, but this time, this time she’d be there. 
Azzi’s leaning against the wall, her eyes closed and Paige has to take in a breath at the sight of her. Sweat sheens against her tan skin and her gameday braids are falling apart just a little but still, she’s perfect. Before Paige can take a step towards her, there’s another girl, all dark hair and long legs, brushing past her, rushing to get to Azzi’s side. It’s like the world has stopped and yet is spinning too fast all at the same time, as Paige watches this girl, Zoe, pull Azzi, Paige’s Azzi, into her arms. 
After the night of the date (and everything else they’re ignoring), Paige hadn’t bothered to bring it up and Azzi had never said anything about it again. Naively, the blonde had thought that maybe that meant nothing much had transpired after the date, silently patting herself on the back for possibly even having had a hand in that. Except, the way Zoe holds Azzi isn’t fucking platonic and the way Azzi relaxes in Zoe’s arms, isn’t fucking friendly. 
“I”ve got you Az,” Zoe whispers into Azzi’s hair and Paige wants to die. She should look away, she should walk away but her feet seem to be glued to the ground. And she remembers the way Azzi’s eyes were searching the crowd and oh- she’d been looking for- Paige can’t even let herself complete the thought because she’s sure she’ll burst into flames the second she does. 
“I’m really glad you’re here,” Azzi says quietly to Zoe. To Zoe, and not Paige. If she could feel anything beyond the dagger twisting in her heart, maybe Paige would hear the way there’s still a tinge of disappointment in Azzi’s voice, as if she’s wishing it was someone else. 
It takes Zoe pressing a kiss into Azzi’s forehead, eliciting a sigh from the brunette for Paige to finally tear her eyes away. Her feet finally move and then she’s running faster than she has in a long time, ignoring the way it causes her muscle to ache. She can’t tell if her rapid blinking is to usher away the tears or to try and prevent the memory of Azzi with some other girl from welding itself into her eyelids. It blurs her vision and in the speed of things, she can barely tell where she’s going. Paige runs chest-first into a wall, bruising her elbow. Her phone slips out of her hands, falling to the ground with a loud thud, the screen protector cracking into pieces. 
And when Paige looks at the mess of her phone on the floor, she thinks it couldn’t possibly have cracked harder than this silly little stupid heart of hers.
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atrirose · 1 year
Text
𝐘𝐎𝐔'𝐑𝐄 𝐌𝐘 𝐒𝐇𝐈𝐏 𝐃𝐘𝐍𝐀𝐌𝐈𝐂 !
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' you're my favorite boy ' said by my favorite girl
— synopsis : enhypen ship dynamic :)
ft. enhypen members , fluff , warning : cursing
ADVISORY TO READ IT WHEN NO ONE IS AROUND BECAUSE YOU WILL BLUSH AND SMILE LIKE CRAZY
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HEESEUNG : blunt and clueless ; he is the clueless one, like his s/o would be telling me that he looks like a tall emo kid and he would still say "you think I'm tall 😍" smiling after ignoring the whole point and turning it into a compliment, shouts out for heeseung for being clueless or else no one would date your blunt ass.
JAY : loves talking and loves listening ; loves to listen every thing that comes out of your mouth, you need to talk about your crazy aunt, np jay got you even though he is trying to do his homework ; need to talk about your bais, np even though he is your boyfriend he will somehow listen to it, you name it he is always ears , likes to cuddle during your daily 2 hr gossip session "yn im sleepy~" — "so I was like bitch sit down- wait you want to sleep" no he is wide awake tell him about your bitch classmate "nah babe go ahead"
JAKE : black cat and golden retriever ; aye we all saw that coming lol, literal embodiment of a golden retriever, he shows enough love for both of you, radiates litral sun rays, human charger, "i cant read Caucasian" no matter how much you love him its just too much " i SWEAR JAKE YOU STRESS ME OUT LIKE WDYM CAUCASIAN- ITS CURSIVE ENGLISH BITCH"
SUNGHOON : flirty narcissists and nonchalant ; randomly picked you to annoy next but guess his charms doesn't work on you "I'm the best partner you can ask for but hey don't fall for me" you secretly enjoyed his reaction after you turn him down "i would rather fall off a cliff" and cue the most dramatic gasp ever by yours truly sunghoon.
SUNOO : sun and moon ; sometimes you wonder which planet did you save to have a bf like him, sunoo entering the classroom starts with a smile that lights the whole classroom then he sits next to you "good morning, here have a short cake its your favorite" smiles, thats it he is too bright, its hard to even look at him.
JUNGWON : confident extrovert with lots of friends and introvert who loves the extrovert ; you can't even count the number of times you felt like someone might take your jungwon from you but his caring and loyal ass proves otherwise "oi oi, where are you going, you are my lab partner" he grabs you by your hoodie "I just thought you have got someone else" drags you with him.
NIKI : smart student and the class clown ; dumb thats what he is, anything he says is not serious and should not be taken as one, he is the most annoying and his voice its so...sweet, "hey! miss A+ please give me the answer please or else I will fail, I swear I will buy you ice creams for a month" actually you are the dumb one, why would you fall for that clown
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AN : after a century ! hi my lovessss
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ddollfface · 4 months
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Hii~ it's me again.
You said The Athlete has siblings right? How is he with them? Or just generally with his family, as of current day?
Also, (with Childhood bestf Darling) what would he do if they had a crush? What if it was one of his other team members?
Nobody can convince me that the absolute black cat of a darling I have in mind would ever have a crush in a normal way.
At first, darling is crushing hard on someone, doesn't really realize it, but a certain other guy does. Then, when darling does realize, they do everything in their power to push that person away and I imagine he's right there, on calls with them late at night as they complain about their crush, because-
"he's horrible, right? And he doesn't even like me. Ugh. I hate him so much. He's cruel, and selfish, and arrogant, who'd like a guy like that?"
Insert our boy with the sweetest, "Of course, pumpkin. He's horrible, you know what he did last summer..." (Cue him telling darling about the most atrocious thing darling's crush ever did.)
- 💗 (Making an OC to ship with him is not a want, it is a need. Also, I absolutely love your writing style. The way you slip from third person writing to first person dialogue is really cool.)
𝐇𝐮𝐬𝐛𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐌𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐚𝐥
𝗟𝗼𝘃𝗲𝗦𝗶𝗰𝗸!𝗔𝘁𝗵𝗹𝗲𝘁𝗲 𝘅 𝗳𝗲𝗺!𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗱𝗲𝗿
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"When I looked into his eyes, I knew he was the one." Trigger Warnings; bad writing, spelling errors, vague baby trapping, reader can get pregnant, both yandere and reader have baby fever (self-insert lol), reader and yandere are 18+, descriptions of sex, sex is brought up, talking about yandere's bad childhood, yandere is a lovesick fool, 18+ If I missed anything, then please let me know ♡ I'm splitting this ask into two different things 'cause it's easier on my tiny brain (I also think they're two completely different asks, so yeah). Also, my writing style (where I slip into thrid person) is inspired by @depravitycentral's writing, their literally so good, please go read it:)))
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Okay, okay, so let me tell you about LoveSick!Athlete and his childhood, more so his siblings. LoveSick!Athlete is the oldest, though he does have an older half-brother. He's not too close to him, and he was never around. This means, that in the family dynamic, LoveSick!Athlete was the oldest.
Now, after him, he has a little sister, who he is very, very, very close to. Her name is Nayda and she's only a year or two younger than him, they have the same dad, who is a complete scumbag btw.
After Nayda and LoveSick!Athlete there's the twins, who are only two years old. They have a different dad from Nayda and LoveSick!Athlete. They're interracial babies (meaning they're a mix of black and white, in this situation), and this has caused a whole bunch of issues for LoveSick!Athlete and his mama. Especially since where he's from, people aren't the most accepting of interracial couples. There have been far too many times when these old ladies will make too many assumptions with their grabby-ass hands, leading to a whole assortment of problems.
LoveSick!Athlete is close with his family and he feels very protective over them, particularly toward his mama and sister. This is partially because they're women and he has a, slightly, closeminded view of women. He sees them as something he needs to protect. He was raised to never, ever hit a girl, ever. That was seen as unacceptable and it was something his mama would be pissed over.
However, this doesn't mean that he thinks women shouldn't work or anything, it's just that he feels an instinctual need to protect women, even if they can handle themselves. This stems from his unstable childhood; how he would see his mama struggle, both financially and romantically. Because she was the only woman he ever really interacted with, rather than his sister, he grew this instinctual, primal even, need to protect women based on his experiences of watching his mama.
Then there's the twins, Bijan and Abbas, who LoveSick!Athlete isn't too close with. Of course, when he's home for holidays, he always, always helps his mama and stepdad with taking care of the unruly toddlers. He enjoys taking care of them, but he doesn't really see them as his siblings, seeing as he was already out of the house by the time they were born.
Though, LoveSick!Athlete does have a good relationship with his stepdad, seeing as his stepdad is a far better man than his pa ever was. His stepdad was his mama's therapist (ooo interesting dynamic), and he really helped his mama through the filling of a restraining order process (it was against his pa). He even calls him dad, something he never did with his pa. LoveSick!Athlete's mama always makes them have "bro-time", as she calls it. She wants her two favorite boys to get along, and it warms her heart every time she sees them sharing a moment, usually, it's a conversation relating to her.
LoveSick!Athlete respects his stepdad as both a man and a person; he believes that he'll take good care of his mama when he isn't there, which is his top priority. He wants his mama to have a stable life, for her to get out of the projects, and have a nice home. LoveSick!Athlete, no doubt, is a mama's boy and always has been. He loves his mama to death and would love for you to meet her. He thinks she'd absolutely adore you, and she does (from what she's heard about you).
Due to how many siblings, and cousins, this man has, he's very, very, very good with children. Out of all of his cousins, he's the third oldest, meaning that he had to take care of all the younger kids. He was always left giving the baby the bottle or picking the twins up from school.
It wasn't his favorite thing in the world, being a babysitter, but it never bothered him too much as he's very good with kids. Babies seem to just relax around him, giving his mama much relief. He just has this atmosphere around him that kids just seem to love.
LoveSick!Athlete likes how energetic kids can be and how they seem to have a rose-colored view of the world. Their overall optimism really brightens his day and he can't help but let his mind wander, thinking of what your children would look like. Would they have your eyes? He hopes so; he really thinks your eyes are beautiful. The way your iris shimmers under light; how he can see his reflection in your eyes. It's like he can see right through you; your every emotion is reflected in your colorful eyes. Whatever you're hiding or refusing to tell him, he can see in them.
Sometimes, LoveSick!Athlete will just sit there and stare at you, without your knowledge, of course. While you two are on a date, he'll just watch you stuff your mouth, unaware of his peering gaze. He just can't rip his eyes away from yours; he sees his future in them, your future together. You'll catch him, eventually, staring at you like a lovesick idiot. And he'll just shrug, after all, he can't deny my feelings, sweetcheeks. You're far too easy on the eyes to not stare at! Don't derive a man from a good view, yeah?
He'll smirk, leaning his cheek against the palm of his hand, and smile slyly.
He's very subtle with his little baby fever spurts. He'll periodically have moments where he'll feel this overwhelming need to breed you, to make your tummy swell with his children. He wants to make you the mother of his kids, to make you a sweet, little mama. He knows you'd be great; you'd be such a good mother, he thinks.
When the two of you are cuddling, he'll absentmindedly rub his hand up and down your midriff, letting his calloused hand trail down to right above your center. LoveSick!Athlete would hold your waist a little tighter, the thought of you all stuff with him, him, him makes him go insane.
He'll hint it to you when the two of you are going at it; your legs hiked up on his shoulders; he's plowing through you. He's never quiet when making love, as he calls it, but when the baby fever is hitting hard, he's never closing his mouth. Little gasps and pants leave his mouth, going on and on about how you're the one for him, baby. God, you'd be such a pretty mommy. Mhm- let me make you a mama, c'mon, angel, I know we're young, b-but I'll make, make it happen. Umgh- for you.
And he'll pout and whine when you refuse to let him go raw, forcing him into a condom. He'll put every excuse in the book. It's too small, 'm too gifted for this tiny rubber, babes. Just lemme go in there, I swear I'll put out(((
He won't, that was a lie, but once you get to that point, where you're all sweaty, sex is heavy in the air, and your mind is all fuzzy, you won't care. You'll forget all about that stupid condom you were so adamant about a few minutes ago. And he's so, so, so glad you did, 'cause now he can let you have all of him, and I mean all of him. The thought of you all stuffed with his cum spurs him on, causing him to tighten his hold around your, already bruised thighs, and kiss up and down your belly, his muscular form hunched over your sweaty one.
LoveSick!Athlete just wants to be a daddy :( And you won't lie, the way he dots on his younger siblings causes your heart to clench; the idea of having a family, though you're both so young, becomes more and more appealing as the days pass by. You just know he would be a good father, you can tell by how his gaze softens with he sees a woman pushing a stroller or a toddler babbling on and on about some random bird they saw.
And he knows the same thoughts are flooding your mind, and he begs you to give in to them, but you always deny it, pushing his face away from yours. You are in college, trying to pursue a career, that you haven't even started, you don't have time for a family yet, you tell him, but all he hears is that you want to have a family with him, at some point. LoveSick!Athlete just has selective hearing, I suppose, as he just grabs your shoulders and gives you an excited smile. He leans close, whispering in your ear, so you do want to have kids? Yeah? I can make it happen; I can take care of you, just wait. I can wait, just for you. We'd be such good parents, babe.
Just wait, he'll convince you, eventually. He's very persuasive, me thinks ;)
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