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winterscaptain · 5 years ago

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figure it out.

Aaron Hotchner x Gender Neutral Reader a joyful future fic

a/n: this has been in my wips for literal months as i’ve done my best to get it just right for yall. i hope you enjoy it, and tell me what you think! There’s an addendum to this one, and i’m already working on it, but we’ll see a few more things before that’s ready :)

words: 3.5k warnings: sex mention, sex implication, language

summary: “love is like a backache. it doesn’t show up on an x-ray, but you know it’s there.” - george burns. au!january 2012.

masterlist | a joyful future masterlist | ajf faq | requests closed!

You roll over in bed when your alarm goes off, but you don’t get very far. Aaron throws an arm over you and pulls you back to him with a grumble.

You huff a laugh and wiggle up against him. It’s all a tease and you both know it - there isn’t any time to get up to anything fun before work, but it’s far too entertaining to rile him up.

“Don’t start something you can’t finish.” His voice escapes his lips between your shoulder blades and you can feel his smile.

“Oh, trust me, babe. I can finish.”

He hums, his smile breaking out into something real. “I noticed.”

+++

When the two of you finally make it out of bed (surprisingly still on time), you grab one of Aaron’s scarves and a hat on your way out. It’s your turn to drop Jack at school today on your way into the office, and the task serves two purposes.

The first? It’s nice to spend time with Jack, just the two of you, when it’s your turn and you’re not on a case. It’s the same for Aaron, who always leaves a little earlier so he and Jack can sit down somewhere and have breakfast together.

The second is pure logistics. You two can’t show up to work in the same car at the same time, so a convenient excuse to separate and stagger your arrivals is welcome.

“Really?”

Aaron’s question stops you at the threshold and you look over your shoulder “What?”

“My hat? My scarf?”

It’s almost too tempting to cave when he’s looking at you like that - his tie hanging around his neck, shirt untucked, arms crossed, and playful frown hiding a smile.

“Yeah. It’s warm and it’s here and we’re late.”

Jack squints up at you and says, “We’re not late.”

“You’re not late.”

The observations come within split seconds of each other and you laugh.

“Fine. Not late, but warm. And you have more hats.” You scamper back into the house to plant a kiss on his lips, smoothing the hair at his temples.

Jack’s laughter is the underscore to your next quip. “You’re very handsome and I’m sure you’re very smart so you can figure it out.”

“Yeah, Dad,” Jack chirps. “Figure it out.”

He has nothing to say to your retreating forms as he catches a glimpse of your smile through the crack in the closing door.

+++

Emily and Spencer are away at a conference-book-signing thing, so it’s just the five of you and Penelope this morning. You’d normally figure that would be Rossi’s purview, but apparently -

“My book-signing days have been put on hold indefinitely in favor of -”

“ - He’s back.” Garcia interrupts, tossing case files at all of you. The conversation is cut short and you suppress a smile. “The Marin headlands last night.”

You can see Aaron’s lips pull as well.

It’s the little things.

Penelope gestures with the notes and crime scene photos appear on the screen. “David Atley and Nicole Puli, both 24, both grad students at Berkeley, shot multiple times in their vehicle-- wait for it--” She clicks again and a familiar sigil appears.

“The Zodiac?” Morgan’s shock is almost sardonic in its delivery.

Rossi snorts. “No way.”

“Come on,” Derek says, amused, while JJ chimes in as well.

“It's gotta be the 2.0 version.”

While neither of you speak, you share a glance with Aaron. You’re kidding.

He only raises his eyebrows for a split second and shrugs.

There’s some part of you a little paranoid that you’re the most obvious couple to exist in the history of the universe. Sure, the team has been teasing you about your friendship for years, the will-the-won’t-they of it all, but now that it’s real you’re almost terrified that they know everything.

Thus, the overcompensation has been wretched. You and Aaron barely look at each other in the field if you can help it (which you usually can’t) and he tends to put you with Derek more often than not.

In truth, the others have noticed, but are far too interested in the spectacle to say anything. Emily’s almost certain the two of you have slept together, and Dave may or may not have suggested the possibility of a secret marriage during your period of suspension.

However far-fetched and ridiculous their theories, they know you two well enough to know that something happened. The tension is gone.

Derek almost finds himself missing the tension. There hasn’t been much to tease you about lately in its absence.

“Yeah, you would think so, except for the crazy similarities in the MO.” Penelope clicks through the photos as she talks.

“I'm talking same victimology, same geography. And,” she adds. “Two souvenirs were left at the crime scene.” She clicks once more and stands back for the full effect.

“He left a photo?” Rossi asks.

She hums in the affirmative. “Local police say that is Marcia Miller. She was found near Napa in 1971. Strongly suspected that she was a victim of the Zodiac, but police never confirmed it and they didn't publicize the case.”

Morgan’s still squinting at the screen. “So the Zodiac took this photo at the killing and then saved it all these years?”

“The Zodiac's last confirmed victim was the cabdriver Paul Stine,” Dave notes devolving into a conversation about The Zodiac, his timeline, his signature.

It’s nothing new - The Zodiac Killer’s case details are common knowledge in your line of work, nevermind the sheer number of copycats that try their hand at the highly-ritualistic murders before inevitably getting arrested.

There’s a reason this guy hasn’t been caught in forty years.

After a few minutes of bouncing between you all, Hotch pushes back from the table and stands. “Have Reid and Prentiss meet us in San Francisco. Wheels up in 30.”

He heads straight to his office to collect his things and you swing in by the tips of your fingers for just a second. “You wanna call Jess or do you want me to?”

In the middle of throwing files in his briefcase, he doesn’t look up when he answers. “Can you, please? I was supposed to meet with Strauss this afternoon and need to stop by her office before wheels up.”

You smile at him, tapping the door frame twice. “You got it.”

+++

It’s boots on the ground right away when you land in San Francisco. You drive to the crime scene with Aaron in the passenger seat beside you and JJ in the back. The radio’s on, and you sing under your breath, tapping your fingers on the steering wheel as you make your way up to the crime scene.

Before you get to the local FBI agents, JJ catches you by the sleeve. “It’s nice to have music in the car again.”

You just smile at her. Aaron looks a little puzzled.

The three of you wipe the looks off your faces by the time you get to Agent Lynn.

+++

“What did JJ mean?” Aaron asks you.

The two of you are alone for the time being, posted up in the conference room with the old Zodiac case files. You look up. “Hmm?”

“What did she mean when she mentioned the music earlier?”

“Oh.” A little flush of embarrassment shoots down your gut. “Derek pointed out to me last summer that I didn’t play any music in the car.”

...while you were gone is the thing you don’t say, but he knows that’s what you mean.

“I didn’t really notice.” You shrug to cover your fib. “I guess I’ve reacquainted myself with the radio in the last couple of weeks.”

Aaron hums, returning to his work. Something’s off, but you’re sure it’ll come up later.

+++

“You don’t think it’s really him, do you?” You ask, unbuttoning your shirt and throwing your pajamas on.

Surprisingly, this case seems to be one of those that allows for sleep at regular hours. For that, you’re grateful. It’s much harder to find time to wind down with Aaron at the end of the day when you’re all forced to sleep in shifts.

Aaron shakes his head, “No, I think Reid’s right. We’re looking at a particularly sophisticated copycat.”

“Isn’t that kind of worse?” Hopping up on your bed, you curl up and look at him over your nose - a clear invitation to join you.

With a huff down his nose and a little smile, he flops down beside you and props his chin on his arms over your belly. “Could be. Luckily, we have Reid.”

You almost think he’s going to say something else, but he gets that pensive look on his face again.

“What?”

With a sigh, he says, “I’m just thinking about what JJ said.”

“Oh, Aaron -”

He doesn’t let you finish. It’s probably a good thing. You didn’t know what you wanted to say anyway.

“I knew how hard it was on me, but I’m realizing more and more how hard it was on you, too.” He shakes his head. “I feel ...I don’t know. I feel like I should have known better… or something.”

Winding your fingers in his hair, you sit in silence for a moment. He doesn’t have anything more to say and eventually he crawls up your body and settles in under your arm, his head on your chest and legs wound between yours.

Sometimes, you’ve found, he likes to feel small.

“You’re safe and you’re home. That’s what matters.” You kiss the top of his head. “And I love you.”

He hums, arcing into your touch and wrapping an arm around your waist. “I love you.”

+++

You spend much of the next day chasing Spencer around the city, keeping notes handy (for yourself, not for him - he doesn't need them) and reporting back on his discoveries to the team like some kind of overwrought and hyper-trained secretary.

Stepping off to the side, you answer a call from Aaron.

“Hit your limit yet?”

You look over at Spencer, who’s flipping through a newspaper like a man on a mission. “It’s actually kind of entertaining.”

And that’s actually true. Watching Spencer push the limits of his intelligence is always a treat - it happens so rarely you almost forget how much you enjoy it every time.

He huffs into the phone. “Hang in there. We’ll all meet back at the precinct once Reid’s done -”

“Doing magic?”

“Exactly. Keep me posted.” There’s a pause. It’s an odd little habit you two developed in the field to leave space for the words you can’t say in front of the others.

I love you.

“Me too.”

+++

You’re almost asleep when a sliver of yellow light shoots across your room, promptly disappearing as the door to the hallway closes.

He pads across the room and slips under the covers. “Hi.”

A little smile crosses your face as you roll over to face him. “Hi.”

Before you can say anything else, his hands are on you and he’s half on top of you as he captures your lips.

Needless to say, the lack of sleep is worth it.

+++

Emily, long after she and Aaron are the only ones left in the precinct conference room, squints as she notices something right under his collar.

He’s already loosened his tie and unbuttoned the top button of his dress shirt, no longer standing on ceremony now that all the local police have retired and the rest of the team gone up to their hotel rooms. There’s not much to do, but the compulsion to get ahead for tomorrow is one neither one of them can shake.

What Aaron failed to remember when executing his wardrobe adjustment was the rather...spirited romp in your room the night prior. The little purple swatches painted on his skin just under the line of his collar stood out stark against the crisp lines of his dress shirt.

Fortunately for you, there was no way in hell the rest of the team would find anything he left on you last night.

Emily reaches into her purse and pulls out a tube of concealer and a powder compact. Though he’s more olive-toned than she is, it’ll be good enough in a pinch. “Hey, Hotch.”

He looks at her over his nose, his eyes tired.

“You might want this for tomorrow morning.” She pushes the crisis control kit across the table to him, but he only frowns and deepens his squint.

By way of explanation, she reaches across the table and presses the tip of her finger into one of the visible bruises in the hollow of his throat. He flinches, freezes, and then immediately drops his head into his hands.

It’s easy to say Emily is amused in the extreme. “Those look...really fresh.”

He shakes his head, insisting as he picks up a file at random, “They’re from before we left.”

It’s only because it’s Emily that he’s even humoring this conversation.

“No they’re not.” She sticks her tongue firmly in her cheek. “These ones are though.” She points at yellowing marks on his collarbone and he smacks her hands away.

“And I know what fresh hickies look like, Hotch. Those are fresh fresh. Like, last night fresh. And we’ve been here for four days.” She frowns, tracking back through the day. “When on earth would you have time to -”

A series of images flash through her head, random wayward connections flashing together in an alarmingly clear picture.

You, avoiding her at the office back in September with quickly-covered marks painted across your neck.

You, flirting with Sean and having way too much fun doing it, looking over his shoulder at ...someone else.

Hotch, in a perpetually good mood (for him, anyway, and despite looking ill-slept) for the last five months.

The way the mistletoe kiss at Dave’s Christmas party looked way too easy, too familiar.

And now, the obvious indicators that Hotch is not only getting it, he’s getting it good.

If he got those last night…

Wait.

Their hotel rooms are right next to …

Oh my God.

Hotch watches the realization flash across Emily’s face, and he knows you’re both busted. Instead of losing her shit like he expected, Emily just leans back in her chair - smug.

“So. Are you still Not the Boyfriend, or has there been an update?”

He sighs.

The corner of her mouth tips up. “How long?”

“For which part? The not-boyfriend part, the boyfriend part, or this part?” He gestures vaguely to the space behind his tie, and Emily snorts.

“Just spill it.”

Holding up a finger, he pulls his phone out of his pocket, dialing the first number on his speed dial.

You’re hardly asleep, sitting up in bed waiting for him with a case file in your lap, when you get the call. You’re not sure who’s listening, so a “Hey, Hotch. What’s up?” will have to do.

“Emily knows.”

You straighten. “How?”

“Doesn’t matter. She knows.”

There’s a scramble, and suddenly Emily’s on the other end of the phone. “He’s got very questionable and very fresh bruises just under his collar. Care to explain?”

There’s another shuffle.

“Ignore her,” Aaron says. With a hand pressed to your forehead, you understand the question implicit in his phone call.

“Just tell her. It’s basically her fault, anyways. If she hadn’t ditched it then we’d have our heads up our asses for another five years.”

“Alright,” then, after a second of realizing you don’t sound sleepy at all, “Go to bed.”

“I’m in bed.”

He rolls his eyes. Emily can only look on with amusement, gleeful in the extreme. “You know that’s not what I mean. Go to sleep.”

“Alright, alright. Fine.” You reluctantly close the casefile and put him on speaker so he can hear the light click off. “I’m going to sleep.” Then, “I love you. Come up soon.”

“Okay.” He shoots a glance at Emily. Because he’ll never hear the end of it anyway, more ammo won’t hurt at this point. “I love you too. Now, really. Go to slee -”

You hang up on him. He double-takes at his phone for a moment before shoving it back in his pocket.

He’s met with Emily’s surprisingly moved eyes. “You’re...okay.”

What she means is, You’re happy.

He knows.

He nods. “I’m okay.”

She puts her files down and leans forward, resting her elbows on the table and lacing her fingers. “Tell me.”

So, he does.

He tells her about the way you stuck to him like glue through the divorce, the way you wiggled your way into Haley’s heart, captured the love of his son, and earned the trust of his entire family.

He tells her what Haley said in the hospital, the tenacious care you showed his unyielding and unwilling ass when he was healing, the way your grief soothed his in the wake of Haley’s loss.

He tells her about the moments of euphoria in the years of want and doubt and fear.

He tells Emily about the day she died, how there was nothing more painful than that necessary lie. He tells her how easy it was to lie to the others, how it ripped him in half to lie to you.

He tells her about the day he left for Pakistan, about the fight the night before, the kiss he pressed to your cheek on the tarmac, the endless, wretched nights missing you in the desert.

He tells her about the fight when he finally came home, skims over the following days, jumps and meanders around to Christmas, to moving in, to the bliss that now seems to follow him wherever he goes.

Emily watches the smile that plays at his mouth when he talks about you, the softness in his eyes as recalls the look on your face and the words you said and the way you are with Jack. There’s a kind of peace in him that she’s never really seen before.

Maybe, she imagines, it was there before she met him (the second time). Maybe this peace existed with Haley. Maybe this is the most she’s ever heard him speak at once. Maybe it makes her smile.

Maybe this peace is what his love looks like.

If that’s the case, she thinks, you are very lucky indeed.

It could have been hours, it could have been minutes, but at some point he stops talking.

“Hotch?”

He looks over at her, the softness lingering in his eyes.

“I’m really happy for you.”

His lips twitch. “Thanks.”

“And you know it’s my God-given right to tell everyone else once this case is over, right?”

+++

You actually are asleep by the time Aaron gets back to the hotel. He leans against the wall in the dark with his hands in his pockets, enjoying the peace before the inevitable shitshow.

He crosses the room and crouches at your side, running the back of his fingers over your cheek. You stir, sleepy noises leaving your throat as your eyes crack open.

“Aaron?”

“Yeah. Just me.”

You smile a little and close your eyes again. “How’d she take it?”

“Remarkably well.” He kisses your forehead. “Get some sleep. I’ll see you in the morning.”

“No,” you whine, drawn-out and slurred. “Don’t leave. Stay. I set an alarm.”

With a resigned sigh, he strips and slides into bed behind you, wrapping you in his arms and holding you close.

+++

You and Aaron sit on proverbial pins and needles for the rest of the case, but Emily keeps her word. The only indication of her knowledge came the morning after her chat with Aaron, when she pulled you to her and hugged you so tight you could hardly breathe.

She seizes her moment on the plane, about halfway home.

“Derek, you owe me fifty bucks.”

She hardly looks up from her book as she speaks.

He takes off his headphones and wrinkles his brow. “What?”

She repeats herself, slower, as if she was speaking to a child. “You. Owe. Me. Fifty. Bucks.”

“...Why?”

Emily finally looks up from her book to pointedly stare at you and Aaron, seated next to each other and sharing a bag of Goldfish you stole from Jack’s snack drawer. You’re both reading from the same file, absently reaching for crackers as you go along.

Derek’s confusion continues to smother his face until it finally clicks in.

He steals a page from Reid’s notebook and balls it up, tossing it across the plane and breaking your concentration. You look up, only a little startled, to find a face-splitting grin blinding you across the cabin.

Derek’s small ruckus has drawn the attention of the rest of the team - well, all except JJ, who’s fast asleep on the couch.

There seems to be a collective sigh of relief as money exchanges hands. You’re not quite sure what the bet was, but Emily seems to have won handily.

Aaron takes your hand under the table, waiting for the other shoe to drop.

It doesn’t.

Everyone simply returns to their tasks, little smiles on their faces.

+++

tagging: @quillvine @agenthotchner @hurricanejjareau @rousethemouse @criminalsmarts @genevievedarcygrangerwriting @ssaic-jareau @davidrossi-ismydad @angelsbabey @hotchsflower @hotchslatte @risenfox @mrs-dr-reid @captain-christopher-pike @dwellingsofrosie @pan-pride-12 @sunshine-em @word-scribbless @jdougl-love @sageellsworth05 @dreila03 @forgottenword @aaronhotchnerr @ssa-morgan @tegggeeee @abschaffer2 @ellyhotchner @lotties-journey-abroad @mrs-joel-pimentel-23-25 @laneygthememequeen @mooneylupinblack @ssareidbby @violet-amxthyst @bwbatta @roses-and-grasses @lcvischmitt @capricorngf @missdowntonabbey @averyhotchner @mandylove1000 @cevanswhre @qvid-pro-qvo @jeor @spencers-hoodrat @infinity1321 @zizzlekwum @popped-weasels @evee87 @nuvoleincielo @this-broken-band-girl @reidtomestyles @hotch-meeeeeuppppp @winqhster @arthurmorrgans @the-falling-in-the-danger @softbibxtch @iconicc @mangoberry43 @andreasworlsboring101 @kerrswriting @mac99martin @itsalwaysb33nyou @baumarvel @kerrswriting @messyhairday-me @ssworldofsw @deagibs @crazyshannonigans @moonshinerbynight @jhiddles03 @teamhappyme @mendesmelodies @starsandasteroids @unicorn-bitch @ambicaos

#aaron hotchner x reader #hotch x reader #aaron hotchner imagine #criminal minds imagine #criminal minds x reader #criminal minds fanfiction #aaron hotchner #criminal minds #hotch #tali writes fanfiction #tali talks cm #a joyful future

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small-round-and-angry · 4 years ago

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My opinions about the Loki (2021) series. Spoilers and all that.

I took some time off the fandom until I felt it was time to make this post, if only to get it out of my system, so I can finally rest. I thought, since I was so pumped for the series to begin with, before it was launched and everything, and how I waited to expectantly for every episode that was airing weekly, that the empty feeling I was experiencing after it was all done was just because, well, it was all done.

I thought maybe it was the normal empty-chested-feeling you get when you finish a movie, series, or book that you really liked / waited a lot for.

It was not it. It didn’t pass. It got worse.

I’m going to put this under a cut, and under the anti-tags, because I know some people liked this show and not everyone has to be miserable with me.

I want to preface this by saying that I respect everyone that was involved in this project, and I know that it may be gut-wrenching to receive criticism on something that you worked in, but I feel cheated. I feel lied to. It’s one thing to work hard and be thoughtful and still receive bad reviews, but I don’t think this is the case at all.

To start it all, I was so excited to see Loki again. He’s the only character that I maintained any attachment to throughout so long, sometimes more, sometimes less, but I always considered myself a fan since I saw The Avengers (2012) with my parents in the theaters, at the ripe age of 12. To be honest, Loki was what got me into superhero movies, and into the marvel fandom at all. And I knew, or at least suspected, that they would do something different with the character. I was ready for that, after reading the comics and realizing that MCU Loki and Comics Loki are two different versions of the same character (more on that later). And I thought it was even going to be for the best, since Tom Hiddleston, bless his heart, was one of the executive producers and, I thought, would have more of a say on Loki’s character arc during the series.

What I watched was, to be completely fair with myself, not Loki. I couldn’t really pinpoint it at the time, but I keep expecting something to happen after he was captured by the TVA to show us his mind at work. A scheme, a plan, anything remotely smart that he cooked up. And yet, nothing. He kept acting…Not Loki. As time passed, I hoped he was biding his time, fooling everyone, that he would reveal his masterplan at the season finale and go back to the main timeline. The series ended and I didn’t see Loki, any of them, act as Loki once.

Maybe it’s because I am a fan of the older version of MCU Loki. The darker, more complicated one. I didn’t want a redeeming arc at all, I don’t think all villains or anti villains need a redeeming arc. That’s boring. And, to my interpretation of his character, shouldn’t be in his future at all. Loki thrives on the gray area. I love not knowing what he is to the other characters, the chaos, the lying and manipulation, the grand schemes. This new content we’ve been getting, since Ragnarok, depict him as a more comedic, campy character (which is …fine? Meh, I don’t care for it).

And of course, that’s not to say Tom Hiddleston didn’t do a good job. Poor man did his best with what was given to him by the writers. It’s hard to keep a character consistent, however, when every director and screenwriter seems to have a different idea of who they are. He kept it together fairly well when Taika attempted to assassinate Loki’s character, but Kate Herron snapped his neck harder than Thanos ever could. And for what?

Sylvie.

Now, hear me out. There’s nothing wrong with the concepts of Sylvie, Lady Loki, and a Love interest. Separately. In trying to bring everything together in one character, the writers not only could not come up with a compelling woman character, but also had to bring down an already well established character, the TITULAR character, no less, so she could look somewhat presentable, which is insulting. And they Still failed. I don’t like the pairing either, but that’s not what I’m talking about (right now). The truth is, I don’t know Sylvie. She just got here, I have no emotional attachment to her whatsoever, so I won’t feel for her the same I feel for Loki, who’ve I watched for almost a decade. And instead of trying to build an emotional connection between Sylvie and the viewer, they chose to spoon-feed us a romance between her and Loki.

Well, more between Loki and Her, and not even that. I felt like Loki was always trailing her like a lost puppy, and big eyes and expectations, and she was giving him…Absolutely nothing. All the sweet moments between them were initiated by him, all the talking about feeling were done by him, all the looks and gestures…And although I understand Sylvie grew up in apocalypses and Loki grew up in a palace, she still claimed to have romantic partners. Multiple, man and women. And still, showed no visible interest in Loki up until the kiss scene, which I suspect was more to shut him up and send him flying that anything.

Excuse me if I want Loki to have a love interest who is actually invested in him too.

And Why make her a Loki variant at all if she is adamant she isn’t Loki? Why go to the extent of dying her hair blonde (where in the apocalypse did she manage to get her hair blonde? WHY?) and then give her horns? If she was taken as a child, where did she get the very Asgardian like leather armor she used? WHERE IS THIS INFORMATION?

If they were going to go so far to alienate her from the identity of being a Loki variant just so they could pair her with Loki and it not be weird (it was), why make her a variant at all? If you’re going to make a selfcest pairing, at least commit to it. Sylvie Lushton, from where they got the name, isn’t a Loki Variant, if anything She’s an Amora Variant. Why name her Sylvie if she has no relation to Amora?

The plot has so many holes and is so disappointing. I was promising Loki playing around and causing havoc with time traveling. When I saw Richard E. Grant had been cast, I imagined the big bad would be King Loki, like in the comics! Something about Loki seeing what he becomes if he let darkness completely consume him, and finding balance in his chaos, after all. The premise of Loki healing though observing himself, or variants of himself, was honestly good. His variants, however, where so underused, poorly used, made Loki look like a fool. Even he was ashamed of their interactions. And Kid Loki apparently Killed Thor, which makes him the leader (???) and that’s never mentioned again. President Loki, who was a big part of the appeal of the trailer, is gone in two minutes. And then there’s the mirror scene from the trailer, that didn’t even make it to the series.

There are other things that bother me a lot about this too, but it’s not my place to discuss them in dept. To list, if anyone is interested in knowing: The underdevelopment of black character, and the reaction of the fandom, to my knowledge, to said black characters, in special Ravonna and Boastful Loki. The misrepresentation of gender fluid people, which if I can recall was one of the points they sold to us as something they would touch into Loki’s characterization. Some people have pointed out that it was biphobic to pair Loki with a woman after he “came out” on screen as bisexual. I am bisexual, and I disagree, but I can see why it’s an issue for a lot of people, as mlm relationships are rare in MCU canon. What I thought was Biphobic, however, was having Loki not show us he was bi, rather than telling us.

In summary, I am very disappointed, and I am mourning. This series managed to do what End Game didn’t, which was kill all hope I had to ever have Loki back. He’s gone.

#anti loki series #anti sylki #anti sylvie x loki #loki series criticism #loki series spoilers #loki series negativity

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dontcare77ghj · 5 years ago

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Hands

Bucky x reader x Loki

Accidents seemed to run in the family. You were an accident. Your father, Brian Banner, didn't want children and thought he was done when Bruce came along.

He wasn't accounting for you to come along when Bruce was almost 15. Bruce wasn't even your full brother. After the death of his mother, he'd moved to your aunts and never made the effort to contact his father. When your father dropped you off on their doorstep as a babe, was the last time Bruce ever saw his father.

You were the result of a one night stand. Your mother didn't want you, your father didn't want you but Bruce wanted you. You were his little sister, his flesh and blood. And honestly, you were happy to grow up with Bruce.

Your brother had his accident in the lab when you were 20. You'd barely had the time to say goodbye to your brother before he had to run. For the next eight years, Bruce had kept in contact with you. It was minimal and infrequent, but you appreciated it all the time.

Two years after your brother had run, you got to see him again. There had been an accident in your lab, causing you to gain strange abilities.

A professor had injected you with an experimental plant poison, causing you to gain control over plants and strangely enough, feel what they could.

You'd used your private line to contact Bruce and he had helped you understand what was happening to you.

In 2012, six years after you gained your powers and Bruce gained the Hulk, Bruce came back to New York.

Bruce fought with the Avengers against a mind-controlled Asgardian God. You weren't an Avenger. You didn't want to be but because Bruce was one, you found yourself hanging around the Tower often.

It was Bruce's fault that you begun hanging around Loki and Bucky. It was because of Bruce you found yourself in the best relationship you'd had since your lab accident.

"Babe, I'll be back in about twenty minutes." You assured Bucky. You were driving back home after spending the day in New York with Bruce. Since Bucky and Loki weren't full-time Avengers, and the three of you had been together for three years, Loki and Bucky moved into your home just outside of New York.

"I don't get why your brother couldn't have just come here today, instead of you driving to New York?" Bucky asked.

"You're not on your phone are you, darling?" Loki questioned. "That's very dangerous."

"I have both hands on the wheel. You're coming through the Bluetooth. I'm fine." You promised them. "And Bruce couldn't come because he's working on something for Tony."

"It's your birthday he should be able to skip," Bucky told you.

"I don't really mind. Either way, I got to see him." You shrugged. "And I get to have dinner with my boys. It's a good day."

"Hurry home, darling. Dinner's almost ready." Loki said. "But be careful."

"I'm always careful and I'm five minutes away." You said.

"Alright, doll. We'll see you when you get back. Love you." Bucky told you.

"Love you both too." You replied, switching the call off as you rounded a bend. You hadn't taken your eyes off the road. You hadn't done anything wrong as a car swerved around the corner and smashed into yours.

You let out a surprised shriek as the car spun uncontrollably off the road before rolling over several times.

You weren't ever able to fully remember the next few seconds of your life. Even as you hung suspended from your seat you weren't sure what happened.

As tears began to fall down your cheeks you wondered if they were from fear of what just happened or if they were because you might never see those you loved again.

That was the last thing you thought before the world went dark.

"I think she's waking up." A voice cut through your foggy brain. "She just moved."

"That might not mean she's awake. It might just be a reflex." Another voice said.

"Darling, can you try to move if you can hear us?" A third voice asked of you. You let out an almost inaudible whine as you willed yourself to follow this. "That was movement." The third man chuckled as a hand placed itself on your knee.

"Honey, don't push yourself. You can't strain yourself to wake up, you're still quite weak and it will hinder your recovery."

"Take all the time you need, doll." Bucky. "We'll be right here."

Listening to the advice you didn't push yourself to open your eyes. You laid there in the darkness, listening to the encouraging words spoken by your brother and lovers, as you slowly became more aware of your surroundings.

You could hear more than just your family's words. You could hear the beeping of several machines. Smell the bitter scent of disinfectant. And feel the burning pain, that was radiating throughout your body.

A loud groan escaped your lips as your eyes finally opened. The harsh bright lights made you close them as quickly as you had opened them.

It took you almost a minute before you were able to keep your eyes open and see the men by your bedside.

"There she is." Loki smiled, squeezing your knee.

"I'm going to grab the doctor," Bruce said, leaning down and kissing your forehead. "You're going to give me a heart attack one day."

"I'm not trying to." You croaked, smiling at your brother.

"Of course you aren't." He rolled his eyes. "I love you, Y/N."

"Love you too, Brucie." You rasped. As Bruce left the room, Bucky grabbed a glass of water and held it to your lips.

“Drink up, doll,” Bucky told you. “You’ve been asleep for a while.”

“How long have I been out?” You asked after downing half the glass.

“You’ve been asleep for almost two weeks,” Loki answered. “You gave everyone quite a scare.”

“Do you remember what happened, doll?” Bucky asked you, watching you in worry.

“I was driving and a car rammed into my side. I don’t remember a lot after that,” You said, groaning as you shifted. “So what’s the prognosis?” You questioned the men looking down at your body. “Did these guys get the worst of it?” You asked, nodding to your hands.

“I think we should wait for the doctor to explain it, darling,” Loki told you.

“Is it bad bad?” You raised a brow at the God.

“It’s not particularly good,” Loki said, causing Bucky to elbow him in the side. “No use in lying.”

“Coming from the God of Lies himself.” You teased as Bruce re-entered with the doctor.

“It’s nice to see you awake, Miss Banner.” The doctor greeted you.

“Nice to be awake, doc.” You said as Bruce sat opposite Bucky and Loki. “So, what’s the damage?”

“Well overall, you’re quite lucky. You cracked two ribs and broke another, you have several deep cuts from glass, and you are covered in bruising, but overall, quite lucky.” The doctor told you, flipping through his charts.

“And my arms? I take it they’re the worst?” You asked, looking down at said appendages. Both were in casts, held above your body, with several pins sticking out of them. “Don’t sugar coat it, doc.”

“There has been severe nerve damage to both your hands,” The doctor sighed. “Multiple torn ligaments. We had to put twelve stainless steel pins in the bones. There is a high likelihood you will never be able to use your hands as you once did. I’m sorry.” She said before leaving the room.

“I’m sorry, doll,” Bucky said, placing a hand on your leg.

“It’s okay. I’m fine.” You swallowed harshly. “It’s just a lot right now.” You told him, letting out a shaky breath.

“We’ll be here to help you every step of the way,” Loki promised you.

“Every step.” Bruce agreed.

It had been two months since your car accident. You were discharged from the hospital last month and had spent this month recovering in the confines of your home.

Bruce came down from New York at least twice a week, if his work permitted, and his brotherly instincts were in overdrive. The man had essentially raised you so you understood his fear at your accident and excused his overprotective behavior when he was around.

Bucky and Loki were godsends. The two were very patient with you when it came to your recovery. They understood your want to move around, to go outside, to just try and move on and didn’t force you back to bed as Bruce did.

After two months your ribs and most of your cuts had healed almost completely. Your body remained covered in dark bruising but it was beginning to fade to a brown shade.

You had only just gotten both the casts off your arms. The doctor was not kidding when she said you would not be able to use your hands as you once did.

Your hands were constantly shaking. You could barely hold objects without dropping them. It took a lot of effort to open cabinets or doors. Anything you wrote looked as though you had written it with your non-dominant hand.

At first, you had attempted to be positive. You were alive after all and apart from your hands, you had only sustained minor injuries.

But as time went on and it became much more obvious as to what you couldn't do as you once had, that peppy demeanor faded into oblivion.

“Fuck!” You yelled as your weak grip on your watering can failed and it dropped from your hands. Water pooled around your feet as you glared at the can.

“Doll? You okay?” Bucky asked, running into the greenhouse.

“No, I’m not okay.” You cried, sinking to your knees. “I’m so done with this.”

“Done with what?” Bucky questioned you, kneeling next to you.

“All of this!” You exclaimed. “I can’t do anything now. I can’t open doors. I can’t write anything. I can’t hold a glass. I can’t even hold a stupid watering can.” You said, beginning to cry tears of frustration.

“It’s okay, doll. It’ll get better.” Bucky cooed, pulling you onto your lap. “We can help you with doors. We can help you with writing things down. We can even help with your garden.”

“But I want to do it. You shouldn’t be forced to do all these things for me. It’s not your job.” You whimpered.

“It’s not a job to love you. It’s our privilege.” Bucky assured you. “You have just gotten out of the casts. You heard what the doc said, there are therapies and treatments to help with the nerve damage. This could get better.”

“I can’t even use my powers.” You said, pointing to the ground in front of you. Slowly and shakily a weak vine appeared from the ground looking sickly before it shrunk in on itself. “This might not get better.”

“We don’t know that yet. Your hands can get better. Your powers can get better. And if they don’t, we’ll be here to help you in whatever way we can.” The brunette man promised you.

“I don’t know what I did to deserve you.” You said, looking up your partner.

“You were yourself, Y/N.” He said, wiping the tears off your face. “Better, doll?”

“Much.” You smiled, leaning up to kiss the man.

“Good. Then let’s go back inside. Last I saw Loki was making a big lunch.” He told you, standing and setting you on your feet.

“I love when he cooks.” You smiled as you walked back into the house.

“You and me both.”

When you awoke the next morning, you were alone. The alarm clock read nine but the sheets were cold.

“Bucky? Loki?” You called, pulling on a dressing gown. “Where are you two?” You asked yourself, exploring the house. Walking through your home, you started to notice several small differences to last night.

All the doors were open. The cabinet doors had been removed. A selection of plastic mugs had been placed on the bottom shelf of your cabinet. And several other small changes littered your home.

Taking note of the open back door, you moved outside and continued down the path as you saw movement in the greenhouse.

“Morning.” You greeted, standing in the entryway as you watched your boys move around.

Both men were before you in jeans and singlets. Bucky’s hair was in a man bun and Loki had his in a low ponytail as Loki levitated pots and Bucky held a hose.

“Morning doll.” Bucky greeted, waving as he continued to water.

“Morning darling,” Loki said, moving over to greet you with a kiss. “Sleep well?”

“Very. What’s all this?” You questioned, staring at all the work they had done.

“Bucky told me you were feeling despondent about your current situation.” He said, taking your hands in his and squeezing them gently. “So we made some changes, bought some new things, and for now we’re your own personal gardeners.”

You couldn’t get out a word that expressed any of the feelings that were coursing through you, instead, you merely grabbed God and kissed him passionately.

“I love you. I love both you so much.” You said, wrapping your shaking hands around his neck.

“And we love you too, darling,” Loki said, pressing a kiss to your forehead. “Now, come. Show us what we should be doing.” He added, grabbing your hand and pulling you towards Bucky.

As a Banner, accidents ran in the family. Some accidents caused life-changing events. Some were as easy to get over as a common cold. If there was one thing in your life you did not regret or think of as an accident, it was your relationship with Bucky and Loki.

Taglist

@rvgrsbrns @smilexcaptainx @hopingforbarnes @starlingelliot @piper-koko-barnes-rogers @jelly-fishy-babie @skeletoresinthebasement @agent-barnes40 @reann-loves-sebstan @skadikh

Coming soon

Dean x reader Cas

Bucky x reader x Steve x Natasha

Bucky x reader x Natasha

Meg x reader x Cas

Wanda x reader x Vision

Steve x reader x Bucky x Peggy

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atlafan · 5 years ago

Text

Take it Slow - Part Seventy-Five

a/n: okay this is my first shot at a harry:y/n fic, and it will be multiple parts. y/n had a bad experience with an ex over a year ago, and finally accepts her coworker and good friend Niall’s invitation to go on a blind date with his friend Harry.

Warnings: SMUT RIGHT AWAY (with, um...bum stuff), and fluff

Harry holds you in his arms and kisses down your neck and chest. He kisses and sucks on your nipple through the material of the bodysuit.

“You look so sexy in this, but I’m takin’ it all the way off now.”

“Okay.”

You lay back on the bed and prop yourself up on your elbows. He kisses down your body while he slides it off. He spreads your legs and kisses from your knee down to your inner thigh. He looks at you while he sucks the skin into your mouth.

“Teasing?” You groan.

“For a change.” He smirks.

He kisses dangerously close to your center, but kisses to your other inner thigh and sucks another mark. He could see how wet you were. He blows on your clit and your hips buck up. He licks a flat stripe up your center. He does this a few times before wrapping his lips around your clit. Your hands slide to his hair.

“Fuck, that feels good.”

You watch as he slides his tongue all around your folds. He licks up and down and side to side, and you get to moan as loud as you want. He was straight up slurping on you, making you come over and over.

“Harry!” You yank his head up. His chin was covered in a mixture of you and his own spit.

“Wha’?”

“I love your tongue, really I do, but do you think I could have your dick now?” He smirks and nods his head yes.

“Sorry, I just…felt like I haven’t had a good taste in a while, and I got a little greedy.”

“Maybe I wanna be a little greedy too.” You bite your bottom lip. “Lemme suck on it, baby.”

He takes his pants off in seconds and gets on the bed. You lick him up and down and suck on him until he nearly comes, but you both wanted to save that for later. You crawl up his body and straddle him.

“Can I ride you first?” You pout. He runs his thumb over your bottom lip and nods.

You lift up slightly and sink yourself down on him, both of you moaning at the contact. He shifts so he’s sitting up against the headboard. You can feel him much deeper this way.

“Can I wrap my hand around that pretty throat, angel?”

“Yes, but, fuck, take your, ngh, rings off.” Harry chuckles but does as you say. He puts them all on his night table.

As you grind on him in a circle he slowly slides his hand up your body. His thumb rubs across your throat. He keeps a light grip on you at first.

“Yellow, remember?” He says to you.

“Mhm.” You smile.

You start bouncing up and down on him, and his grip tightens a little more. It was just enough pressure to heighten your other senses. When you come again he lets go of you and you kiss him, wrapping your arms around him.

“You’re so fuckin’ beautiful.” You suck his tongue into your mouth and he groans. “M’gonna put you on your side and drive it in deep.” You mouth falls open.

You get off him and get on your side. He straddles one of your thighs and lifts the other over his shoulder.

“Oh fuck!” You scream as he thrusts into you, hitting your g-spot immediately. “Harry! Right there, keep doing that, shit!”

He doesn’t let up, he drives in deep hitting your spot over and over. You had lost track of how many times you came. You eventually end up on your back with him rocking in and out of you.

“Here’s what’s gonna happen next.” He says into your ear, causing you to arch your back. “I’m gonna come inside you, fill you to the brim, and then you’re gonna fuck me, really fuck me.”

The thought alone almost you come again. Harry fucks into you and you feel his come shoot inside you.

“Shit.” He says. You kiss before he pulls out. “I’ll, uh, go grab the towel and lube.”

You nod and go grab the special box.

“Wait, um, could you just like take a shower quick?” You ask blushing.

“Sure, yeah, five minutes.”

Harry comes out of the bathroom a few minutes later good to go. He lays the towel down and tosses the lube to you. He grabs you by the back of your neck to kiss you. He lays all the way back, and you grab the lube. You warm some up in your hand and squirt some right on his hole. He winces as how cool it is.

“Sorry, sweetie.”

“S’okay.”

You get your middle finger covered and you stroke it around him at first before slipping it inside. He hugs his knees up to his chest for you. Once he’s stretched out enough, you put the strap on and lube it up.

“Ready, baby?”

“Mhm.”

You insert the tip and slowly slide your way into him. You watch as his lips part and his eyes roll into the back of his head.

“You look so good, Harry. Taking it so well.”

“Fuckin’ me so good, angel.”

You smile and start to rock in and out of him. You give him a good thrust and you hit his spot. You use a hand pump his cock. You run your thumb over his tip.

“Y/N.” He moans. “I’m gonna, ahhh, I’m gonna come babe!”

You thrust hard inside him and he screams, full on screams like you’ve never heard him before. From the way you were angling his cock, and from your surprise, his come gets all over your face. You didn’t even care because you had to clamp your legs together. You came from the sound of his scream.

“Shit, I’m so sorry.” He says when he sees his come on your cheek and mouth and chin.

“No, that was my bad, I got…caught up.” You slowly pull out of him and he whimpers. “Please, please stop making those noises, it’s too much.” You both start laughing. You take the strap off. “What, um, flavor do you want tonight?”

“You pick, you’re the one with come all over your face.”

“Thanks.” You giggle.

You fill up the tub and throw a vanilla bath bomb in. You wash your face off and call for him. He kisses the top of your head.

“Hey…do you think I could sit in front of you this time.” Your cheeks grow red and you shove your head into his chest.

“Yeah, babe, of course.” He wraps his arms around you. “You okay?”

“I feel shy all of a sudden.” He feels a wetness on his chest and pulls your face back.

“Why are you cryin’, what happened?”

“I have no idea, I’m just feeling overwhelmed.”

“Alright, no reason to be, okay? I’m okay. Did I do somethin’?”

“No, I, I don’t know what’s wrong with me.”

“Nothin’, honey.”

He gets into the tub and you get in and lean your back against his chest. He wraps his arms around your stomach.

“I’m sorry, I should be the one taking care of you.” You say looking up at him.

“I’m fine.” He smiles. “You typically need more aftercare than I do anyways.”

“Aftercare?”

“Yeah, that’s what it’s called after you do stuff like that. It’s why you get so shy, you take a little bit of time to come back to me…you’ve done it since we became intimate. It’s why I always try to leave time to cuddle you after. Remember a while ago, when we were still livin’ at your place, you came home and we did it on your lunch break and you said you felt weird all day, and then you wanted me to lay on you?”

“Yeah?”

“Well…there yeh go.”

“I always thought that was something people did after like…BDSM or whatever. I mean, I know we do some different things, but…”

“Sometimes it doesn’t matter what you’re doin’. I mean, you were super shy after the first time I made you come, remember? Think I held you for most of the mornin’ that day.”

“I didn’t realize I was so needy.”

“No! You’r not needy at all.”

“I wasn’t always like that afterwards…I think what happened to me…made me close off and shutdown afterwards. I’ve always just felt realty safe with you though.”

“Good, I wanna always be the thing that makes you feel safe.” He pulls you closer to him.

“I love you, Harry.”

“I love you too, darlin’.”

“Harry, no offense, but you’re walking like you have a stick up your ass.” Mariah says to him.

“Yeah, and you look exhausted. Was the coffee I got not strong enough?” Isaac asks.

“No it was the perfect coffee, Isaac.” He smiles. “I just had a, um, long night.”

“Is everything okay?” Mariah asks.

“Yeah, everything’s great. Just had a pleasant evenin’ with my girl after my family left.”

He walks over to his set up for the day. Isaac and Mariah share a look.

“Define pleasant?” Isaac asks. Harry turns to look at them.

“Nothin’, we just got to spend some alone time together.”

“And that’s causing you to walk like that?”

“Walk like what?” Harry’s cheeks were starting to grow red.

“Like you-“

They’re cut off when the first client of the day walks in.

“Check them in, please.”

“This conversation isn’t over.” Isaac saunter over to his desk and checks the people in, a young girl and her father.

“Think she’s with me, I’ve got senior portraits all day.” Mariah says.

“Me too, I think. It’s been really fun. I wonder what Y/N’s senior photos looked like, bet they were cute.”

“I’m sure they’re on her Facebook. I know when I got mine I posted every single one, and the one my friends liked the most was the one I used in the yearbook.

Harry takes his phone out and goes to your Facebook page.

“Go to her albums, bet you she has a, yup! Senior year, 2012-2013.” She points to it and Harry taps on the album. “There! That one of her sitting next to the tree!”

Your hair looked slightly different. It was still long, but you had swept bangs across your forehead, and the blonde highlights you had were much more vibrant. You had a bright smile on your face, and your green eyes popped. You could really see the freckles on your face from your sun kissed skin. You had a blue top on with jeans.

“You were right, Harry. She does look cute.”

“She looks beautiful.”

“Good photographer.”

“Nah, she’s just that gorgeous.” She nudges him and he smiles.

“Maria, this is Alex, you’ll be taking her senior portraits today. Dad’s going to be at the coffee shop next door.” Isaac says.

“Great! We’re going to start outside, okay?”

“When’s my first appointment supposed to get here?”

“About fifteen minutes.”

“Great, I’ll be up in my office.” Isaac watches Harry slowly climb the stairs.

“Harry…”

“Stop watchin’ me!”

“Sometimes I wish we had summers off.” You tell Niall as you both walk Buster during your lunch-break. “Like, what really needs to get done?”

“I know, it’s hard on days like this. I miss just goin’ to the beach in the middle of the week when it’s not so crowded. We should go to Castle Island this weekend. Water’s probably still too cold, but at least we could sit out, go to Sully’s.”

“That’s my favorite place in the world, so obviously I’m in.”

“Right, your grandparents lived right around there.”

“Mhm.” You smile. “It would be nice to just get out, plus it’s dog friendly.”

“Does Harry have to work Saturday? I think just in the morning, he could always meet us later.”

“True, I’ll see what Sarah’s up to. I had no idea she online tutors in the summer…thought she’s have more free-time once school ended.”

“It’s really good extra money. Rachel scoops ice cream at a local place for extra cash. Being a teacher sucks sometimes, I don’t know how they do it.” You stop to let Buster pee. “Besides, with it being Saturday, Sarah should be free. I haven’t been to Castle Island in a while, this’ll be fun.”

You and Harry get home around the same time for a change.

“Hey you!” You say excitedly and kiss him. “This is nice.”

“I know! My dad actually ended at a reasonable hour. Mariah and Isaac are still there, but I’m the boss so I get to leave when I want.” He chuckles. “Actually they told me to go home. Felt like my eyes were goin’ to fall out from editing. I need to buy those glasses you have that take the blue light out of the screen.”

“Oh those work great for long days. I can get you a pair.”

“I can buy ‘em myself.” He gives your bum a pat and goes into the kitchen.

“I know you can…oh my goodness.”

“What?”

“Do we actually get to cook together tonight?” You gasp, and then so does Harry.

“I think we do! What is this domestic shit that we get to do?”

“Such a treat.” You giggle.

You both cook up a stirfry together.

“We should pick up some corn and grill this weekend, supposed to be nice out. I only have to work early Saturday mornin’.”

“Yeah! We could have everyone over for dinner. Niall and I were thinking of heading out to Castle Island, he’s gonna see if Sarah can come too, didn’t know if you wanted to meet up with us when you’re done.”

“Castle Island….” Harry looks off as if to jog his memory.

“You know, it’s by L Street Beach.”

“Oh right! I’ve been there a couple times.”

“My grandparents lived right near there, I practically grew up going to that beach and park…I haven’t been in a long time.”

“Gonna be too cold to swim still…”

“We won’t swim, might just sit out for a bit, walk around to the library, grab lunch at Sully’s.”

“That sounds nice, yeah I could meet you there when I’m done. Probably get there around lunch time.”

“We’ll probably drive over if you wanna just uber there when you’re done, then you can come home with us.”

“Sounds good, babe.”

Saturday morning, Harry’s out by 6AM. He gives you a long, sleepy kiss goodbye and out he goes. You get up around 7AM, not wanting to waste the nice day. You lather your arms and shoulders up with sunscreen before putting a crop top tank on, and some high waisted jean shorts that were loose around your thighs. You put your hair up in your high pony, and take out a few pieces of hair to frame your face. You slip on your tennis shoes and leash up Buster. You wave to Niall, and head across the street.

“No Sarah?” You frown.

“No, she had to go home this weekend actually. Her mum is paintin’ a bunch of rooms at her house and she needed her help movin’ furniture. Bein’ an only child must suck.” He chuckles. “Harry mettin’ us later?”

“Yeah, should be around lunch time. Let me just text him so he knows what’s up.”

You: hi baby, Sarah had to go home this weekend :( so you’ll be meeting Niall and I later

Harry sees your text and smiles at your courtesy.

Harry: sounds good, angel

You text Sarah too, letting her know she’ll be missed. You and Niall head to his car.

“What’s in the backpack?” He asks. You had a small backpack with you.

“Well, there’s water and a bowl for Buster, and I packed some extra sunscreen.”

“You’re always thinkin’.”

“I was thinking we could just hang at the beach for the morning, would that be alright?”

“Yeah! Don’t mind gettin’ sun at all.”

You and Niall drive to the beach and find a place to park. He had some towels in his trunk that you were able to lay out to sit on. You take a deep breath and put your sunglasses on.

“Alright?”

“Yeah…just a lot of good memories here.” You turn around and look across the street. “Nannie and I would sit on the beach, and Papa would sit across the street at one of those benches with his Walkman and a cooler of beer.” You laugh.

“He wouldn’t sit on the beach with yeh?”

“Well, I guess before I was born he was always in the sun, but he got skin cancer, so he couldn’t sit in the sun. So he’d sit in the shade. Then at lunch time we’d go across the street and sit with him. He was so cute, he always made sure to have a bucket hat for me, and to pack enough tonic for us.”

“No waves here, was it fun to swim?”

“Oh sure! I usually found another kid to play with too, and they had a ton of sand toys for me. There was this guy too that sold $1 fudge pops, and my Nannie would always get me one. Coming here, and the summers in middle school they were up in Seabrook were the best times of my life.”

“Maybe someday when you have your own kids you can bring ‘em here, and tell them all about your grandparents and how special it is.” You start to tear up. You smile and nod at him.

“C’mere.” He chuckles and throws an arm around you. You lean into him and sigh.

“I’m fine, I promise.”

“I know, you’re always fine.”

You both end up reading for a bit and listen to some music. Around eleven you decide to start walking towards Sully’s where you’d be meeting Harry. Buster was excited for the walk.

“Does he know it’s just fast food?”

“Oh god, you know, I didn’t even think to mention it. He could have fries?”

“Yeah, and ice cream.”

“That’s for on the way back after we walk around the castle.”

Harry’s uber pulls up to Sullivan’s, or Sully’s as you call it. He was wearing a pair of tan slacks, cuffed at the bottom, and a short sleeve white t-shirt tucked in. He had a dress shirt on earlier, but threw it in his bag. He gets out of the car and sees you, Niall, and Buster walking up.

“Oi!” He waves to the two of you and you smile at him. He jogs over to the two of you.

“I literally had no idea you owned sandals.” You say kissing him.

“I’m full of surprises.” He hooks an arm around your waist. “You look cute, baby.”

“Thanks.” You hand him Buster’s leash so he can take control of the dog.

“You two have fun at the beach? Saw your selfie earlier.”

“Yeah!” Niall says. “Started readin’ that book you recommended, it’s thrilling so far.”

“Oh good! I knew you’d like it, mate.”

You giggle as you walk up to the little fast food place you love so much.

“Harry, this is going to shock you, but I will be ordering chicken nuggets for myself.”

“Really? Why’s that?”

“This is the only fast food place I like chicken nuggets from, and it would be blasphemous if I didn’t get them now.”

“You won’t get sick?”

“Nah, I just won’t look at it while I bite into it.”

“Grab me a hot dog and a coke, I’ll stay out here with the dog and keep a table.” Niall says.

“Thanks.” You smile and head in with Harry. “How was work?”

“Good, it was just a quick engagement shoot.”

“You look really cute too, so summery.”

“Just wait until I break out the jorts, you’ll love it.” You laugh and walk up to the counter. “Hello, can I please have one hotdog and fries, chicken nuggets and fries, and…” You look up at Harry.

“Another order of fries. Two cokes, and-“

“A water please.”

You’re given a number and you hang off to the side after Harry pays.

“I could’ve gotten it.” You say to him.

“I know.” He rubs your back. “So you used to come here with your grandparents?”

“Mhm, all the time.” Your number gets called and you grab the box they put everything in. Harry grabs ketchup, napkins and straws.

“Thanks.” Niall says when you hand him his hotdog.

You and Harry sit, and he watches you carefully as you bite into your chicken nugget. Your eyes close and you’re transported to a much different, happier time in your life.

“Oh my fucking god.” You say. “That’s good.” You say opening your eyes. “I probably won’t eat all of these, but damn, if that’s not a good nugget.”

“I like that the fries are crinkle cut, very old school.” Harry says, popping one into his mouth.

You all enjoy your meal. You take the bowl out of your bag and put some water in it for Buster. After he laps it up you all throw your trash away, and make your way down the walking path towards the Castle.

“Can you tour it?” Harry asks.

“I think so, but I never have.”

“Sometimes I forget this part of Boston exists.” Niall says. “Like there’s a beach, this beautiful park. Everything yeh need.”

“It was perfect growing up.”

You walk down a certain path that leads you to the playground you used to play at when you were a little girl. You stop short. It looks the exact same. Not rundown or anything, they just hadn’t updated anything.

“Y/N?” Harry says when he notices you’ve stopped walking.

Your bottom lip starts to quiver, and you feel tears rolling down your cheeks. You lift your sunglasses up to wipe them away.

“I just need to sit for a second.” You go over to one of the benches facing the playground. Harry and Niall sit on either side of you. “My grandparents used to sit right here and watch me play after we’d go to Sully’s, and then we’d go back for ice cream. I’m sorry, I didn’t think I’d get so emotional.” Harry hands you a napkin so you can wipe your eyes. “Thanks.”

“It’s okay, love.” He rubs your back.

“Being here…just makes me miss those times even more, makes me miss my Papa even more.” You bite your inner cheek so you don’t get more emotional. You take a deep breath and stand up. “Let’s keep going, I’m fine.” You smile. “It’s all good memories.”

Harry holds your hand the rest of the time you’re out walking. You take a bunch of pictures and selfies with the boys. Niall takes a nice one of the two of you and Buster. It was nice hanging out with the two of them without any hostility for a change. By mid-afternoon you make your way back to the car. You go to sit in the back, but Harry stops you.

“Sit in the front, babe. I’ll sit with Buster.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah, I don’t mind. Mate, we’re gonna do a bit of grillin for dinner, wanna come by?”

“Sure! That sounds great. I’ll pick up some beer.”

Harry hums his response. Niall drops the two of you off so he can go to the liquor store. You and Harry get Buster upstairs and some fresh water. He was hot.

“I’m gonna change quick, I’m sweatin’.”

“Me too actually.”

You follow him into the bedroom. Harry throws on a different white t-shirt and a pair of gym shorts. You put on a different tank top.

“Much better.” You say.

He follows you into the kitchen to get all of the food out of the fridge and he goes out to the balcony to fire up the grill. Niall comes up with the drinks, and the three of you settle in outside.

“This is perfect.” Niall says, sipping on his beer.

“Right? What could be better?” You say.

Harry gets all the food off the grill and puts it on the table. You all make plates and sit back to eat.

“Y/N, what do you think you want to do for your birthday this year?” Niall asks.

“Honestly, I’d love to do what I did for my 21st and just rent a house by the beach and go nuts. Twenty-five is a big deal, you know?”

“I’m surprised you don’t wanna go nuts at a club in the city.” Harry chuckles.

“She did that last year.” Niall laughs.

“First of all, you came for like five minutes. Second of all, I’ve done the club thing enough. I just think it would be fun to do like a really long weekend, get an air bnb and have fun.”

“Think we could make that work.” Harry says. “Who would you want there?”

“You, me, Niall, Sarah, Rachel, and Mariah.” You shrug.

“Alright.”

“Harry, when do you go to London?”

“Middle of July, two weeks. Y/N’s comin’ for one week, even though I think she should come for two.”

“Harry, I can’t take that much time off.”

“When do you go to Ireland?”

“End of August, two weeks.”

“Good, I’m sure your family misses yeh. I was gonna go for three weeks, but since I just saw my mum and sister I figured I didn’t need to be gone for as long.”

Your phone starts ringing, a call from Seth Rowan.

“Oh, great, your ex-boyfriend.” Harry whines.

“He’s not my, I never, shut up.” You grab your phone and answer it. “Hello?”

“Hey Y/N!”

“What’s up, Seth?” You stand up to take the phone call inside. They hear you laughing from inside.

“Nope.” Harry says. “Nope, don’t like that.”

“I still can’t believe her and Sarah were hookin’ up with him at the same time…”

“We did the same thing.”

“I know, but girls get catty about that kind of stuff.”

You come back outside with a glass of water and sit down.

“I’ll have to ask, I’m not sure what our plans are yet.”

“Well, anyone’s welcome, bring your boyfriend if you want too.”

“Thanks, I’ll definitely ask. Thanks for the invite.”

“Course, talk to you soon.”

“Bye!” You hang your phone up and take a sip of water. “My friend, emphasis on friend, is having a party on the fourth of July. His parents have a house in Hull on the private part of the beach, are you guys interested? His parties are a lot of fun.”

“Could be nice to be out in the open air and not in stuffy apartment.” Niall says to Harry.

“He’s going to invite Rachel and Sarah too, and I know they’ll want to go. He even said I could bring my boyfriend, isn’t that nice?” You look at Harry.

“Sure, I guess we could that. But only if we all go.” He looks at Niall.

“Yeah, why not? I love meeting people that my girlfriend has fucked.”

“Hey!” You slap Niall in the arm. “That’s not very nice. It was so long ago, we were like nineteen or twenty for god’s sake.”

“I’m only kidding.”

“No you’re not. Jesus, you guys can be such babies sometimes.”

“So if someone Harry hooked up with invited him to a party and you’d have to meet them, you wouldn’t care at all?” Harry cuts you off before you can speak.

“This one? She’s the least bothered person I’ve ever met. Didn’t have a problem with Myk, and-“

“Yeah but you and Myk hate each other. I’m talkin’ about a friend.” Harry looks at you.

“I probably would feel…uneasy at first, but I’m the one sleeping with him now, not someone else.”

“What was so great about this guy anyways that you and Sarah were sharin’ him?”

“It wasn’t like that. It wasn’t like oh you get him Friday and I get him Saturday. Neither of us realized we were hooking up with the same guy until we both went to one of his parties. We were both hooking up with multiple people at the time so it wasn’t a big deal.” You take another sip of your water and scrunch your nose. “Also, I really don’t want to think about the people I used to sleep with, it’s gross.”

Harry and Niall start laughing.

“Gross?” Niall says.

“Yeah! I’m having the best sex I’ve ever had, why the fuck would I even think about anyone else.”

“God, don’t inflate his ego.”

“You heard that though right? Best she’s ever had. See if Sarah can say the same, mate.”

“She has said the same.” You say.

“See! Wait, how often do you two talk about your sex lives?”

“Um…like all the time.” You look at the two of them. “You guys don’t talk about it?”

“A little.” Harry says. “But not all the time. Don’t you have better things to talk about?”

“Not really.” You shrug. “All three of us do it. It was really helpful in school, we could compare notes.”

“Do you still compare notes?” Niall asks. You grab your beer and sip on it.

“Y/N, are you saying the three of you go into like…intimate details about us with your friends?”

“No! Not…super intimate. We just talk about things, that’s all. Like oh do you like it when a guy does this? No? Me either. Stuff like that.”

“But you talk about us specifically, right? You must if she told you-“ Niall starts, but you cut him off.

“Hey! I’m allowed to have girl talk with my friends, and that stays between us. Just like whatever you two talk about stays between you two. Harry said you talked about guy stuff on your camping trip. How do I know that doesn’t include a conversation about my vagina?”

“Okay! That’s enough of that.” Harry says. “We didn’t talk about sex once when we went campin’, did we?”

“No, actually we didn’t.” Niall starts laughing. “We had real, mature conversations.” He stands up and pats the top of your head. “Something you’re young mind clearly isn’t equipped for.” He goes inside to use the bathroom.

“You’re two years older than me you asshole!” You laugh and look at Harry. “What?”

“Do you tell your friends everything?”

“Define everything…”

“You know what I mean.” You didn’t want to lie to him, but you also didn’t want to start an argument.

“Sarah and I bought all that stuff together…”

“But does she know you’ve used it.”

“I know she’s used some things and she knows I’ve used some things. I didn’t get into the nitty gritty though.” You say quietly, unsure of when Niall will return from the bathroom. “Like they don’t know…the specifics.”

“Y/N, I don’t want you talkin’ about that in general. That’s just for us. Imagine if Niall knew you knew about Sarah usin’ a butt plug on him.”

“I didn’t say specifically what she used.” You sit back and smirk. “Seems like you guys have talked about it.”

“A little…but I certainly haven’t told anyone about…you know.”

“Are you embarrassed?”

“No, but I think that’s a really personal thing to talk to your friends about, even if you don’t go into specifics.”

“Sorry…I won’t talk about it.”

“Okay.”

Niall comes back out with a three fresh beers and hands you both one.

You couldn’t have asked for a better Saturday for with your two favorite guys. Niall left around 8PM. Buster got settled in his dog bed.

“I need to shower, get all this sunscreen off me.” You say to Harry.

“Couldn’t agree with yeh more. You know, you really tan nicely.”

“So do you.”

You both head into the bathroom to shower. You take turns washing each other and you wash Harry’s hair for him, just how he likes. You both get cozy in bed and he offers to read to you for a bit. You loved when he’d read to you. You hadn’t had much time for it lately, so you’d take it when you could get it. You hoped every weekend this summer could be just as perfect.

#take it slow #harry styles #harry styes x reader #harry styles y/n #harry styles x y/n #harry styles imagine #harry styles fluff #harry styles fluff fic #harry styles smut #harry styles smut fic #harry styles fic #a nice long one for yall #hope you like!

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fyexo · 6 years ago

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191220 K-Pop Stars EXO Reflect on How Far They've Come — and How Far They'll Go

As Chen tells Teen Vogue, this year has been “a time for EXO to reflect” on their past, present, and future.

Chances are, even if you didn’t know it at the time, you’ve seen the members of the legendary K-Pop group EXO before. Their musical prowess speaks for itself, but even beyond that, their careers have taken over TV, fashion, celebrity culture, and more in the past year.

Maybe you've seen rapper and multi-instrumentalist Chanyeol, 27, shaking hands with Zendaya at Paris Fashion Week. Or perhaps it was breathtaking dancer and rapper Kai, 25, cracking 7th place on British GQ’s Best-Dressed Men of 2020 list. Or singer and composer Lay, 28, becoming Calvin Klein’s first-ever Chinese global ambassador. You might’ve watched rapper and youngest member Sehun, 25, on Netflix’s detective program Busted, or glimpsed leader and vocalist Suho, 28, waving from the red carpet as an honorary ambassador of the International Film Festival & Awards Macao. These are just a few of the places and memories that stamp the proverbial passport of EXO’s lives this year.

It’s been an equally powerful year musically for EXO too. With two members — Xiumin, 29, and D.O., 26, — currently completing their mandatory military enlistment and Lay promoting in China, the remaining six members of EXO have explored their own individual musical identities in 2019. Power vocalist Chen, 27, released two solo albums that chronicled love and heartbreak through mature, heart-warming ballads, while Baekhyun’s groovy solo album, City Lights, broke the highest monthly sales record for a solo artist in South Korean chart history with over 500,000 copies sold. Sehun and Chanyeol teamed up this summer for the debut of EXO-SC, EXO’s hip-hop sub-unit, while Baekhyun and Kai joined forces to “jump and pop” in SM supergroup SuperM.

As Chen tells Teen Vogue, this year has been “a time for EXO to reflect” on their past, present, and future as they reunite to promote their sixth album Obsession.

It’s December 4th, 2019, and the six members are dressed in thick, woollen, neutral-toned sweaters and trenchcoats to protect themselves from the arctic winds billowing throughout Seoul. There’s a warm camaraderie to their interactions as they laugh amongst themselves and take sips of their iced coffees. The atmosphere feels comfortable and familial, born from an understanding of each other’s mindsets and quirks that has been learned organically over the group’s career.

“It’s been seven years since we debuted and we’ll be hitting eight years next year; that’s a long period of time,” Chen says. His humble, calm demeanor is a balm for the rest of the group who cling to his introspective thoughts. “We reflected on our past journey and tried to make improvements in this new album. It’s been a grateful and fun time.”

This desire to continuously push boundaries both musically and creatively has been at the crux of EXO’s identity since their debut in 2012. Originally split into two groups, EXO-K and EXO-M, EXO performed their shared discography in both Korean and Mandarin in an effort to appeal to two major music markets simultaneously. The groups came together in 2013 to release their debut album, XOXO, and the album’s repackage released later in the year saw EXO’s popularity hit a fever pitch with the funky, dance-pop single “Growl.” Since then, each of EXO’s last five albums have sold over a million copies in South Korea alone, earning them the title “quintuple million sellers.”

The group is not only a staple in South Korea but across the globe too. From performing in front of the world at the closing ceremony of the 2018 Winter Olympics to becoming the first K-Pop group to have their faces projected on the Burj Khalifa in Dubai, EXO has stamped their name in the annals of pop history with their devotion toward their music, fans (called EXO-L), and each other. As they’ve matured over the years, that dedication hasn’t wavered.

“In our early years we just played together, whereas now we’ve grown up and matured,” Baekhyun replies. The singer’s personality is brighter than his shining white hair, and he thrives on the reactions to the jokes he makes throughout our chat. “We share a lot about where we’re headed in life, what we want to do for the upcoming album, and discuss how we can come together closer as a team to improve our teamwork.”

That tight-knit teamwork manifested itself in multiple ways throughout this year. From congratulating each other on Instagram like Lay did for Baekhyun’s solo debut to Xiumin and Sehun emceeing Chen’s solo album press conferences, the members have made it a point to support one another with every milestone they achieve, both individually and as a group. It also took center stage as the group embarked on their fifth world tour, Exo Planet #5 – The EXplOration, this July.

Part of the decision to go on tour, according to Suho, is because it makes the fans “happy,” which in turn makes EXO happy; this treasured time spent with fans also one of the reasons why the group worked tirelessly to release their new record in between their jam-packed personal schedules.

“Since the year EXO debuted, we’ve released an album every year. We’ve never skipped a single year,” Suho answers. With attention-grabbing ruby red hair, the leader holds himself with a quiet confidence and classic charm. “Even though it wasn’t a formal promise we made, it’s been a tradition to release an album each year, even if that means we have to make the promotion period short. Everyone’s been having hectic schedules, but it’s very meaningful for us to spend the end of the year with the fans.”

Heavily rooted in the group’s constant state of reinvention, the concept for Obsession sees EXO face off against their evil, superpowered doppelgängers X-EXO. Superpowers have been a common thread that has tied EXO’s music video multiverse together since their debut single “MAMA”, with each member utilizing their own signature power ranging from Chanyeol’s pyrokinesis to Kai’s teleportation abilities. When X-EXO arrives ready to destroy the planet in the group’s music video, the result is an explosive, superhero-style brawl between good and evil that leaves viewers enthralled.

In the lead up to shooting the music video, EXO emphasized the importance for both of their characters to have their own distinct, contrasting identity. While EXO dressed in weathered, straight laced black cargo pants and berets as if ready to march into war, X-EXO celebrated their eccentricities with jewel toned hair colors, white eyelashes, and uniquely cut clothing that bridged the gap between menacing and seductive.

“Our main focus was to draw a big contrast. All of us thoroughly discussed with our makeup and hair artists to bring that contrast, almost to the point of exaggeration,” Chanyeol says. He’s as jovial as his bubblegum pink hair and is openly expressive with his emotions, which light up his face whenever he speaks. “We tried to make X-EXO look very dark. EXO, on the other hand, was the good, righteous EXO like what fans have seen in the past. They came easy and naturally.”

“Like Chanyeol said, we discussed thoroughly with the makeup, hair, and costume team so that you could see the contrast right away,” Kai continues. Conscientious and thoughtful, Kai surveys the older members before answering so he doesn’t interrupt them. “Our attitudes also play a key role because they add to the strong visuals. Since it was a video, we all tried to make our performances convincing. X-EXO showed something that EXO had never done before — something mischievous.”

Amongst the members, X-EXO wins in a landslide over the team they liked the most.

“X-EXO had a stronger visual impact,” Baekhyun explains. “Personally, I wish that we made the plain EXO look cooler. That would have been right, because EXO was supposed to be the revolutionary army against X-EXO! I feel like they were visually weaker; I wish we had expressed more passion as EXO.”

With every album, EXO releases a bold title track that shatters the current K-pop paradigm, like the sinister “Obsession” or the reggae, EDM hybrid track “Ko Ko Bop." The remainder of the tracks on the albums typically allow EXO to explore new genres and make them their own, which range from hip-hop dance tracks like “Ya Ya Ya”, which samples ‘90s vocal trio SWV’s “You’re The One”, to heart-fluttering ballads like “Butterfly Effect."

Kai’s favorite track on the album is “Jekyll," which he loved from the first listen. “It starts off like a sweet R&B song, but the chorus suddenly changes into this shouting, which I think is in line with the duality expressed in the album,” he says. “I immediately thought that we could show a very different type of performance for this song — I can’t wait to perform this on stage and show the fans.”

“I like “Obsession” the most,” Sehun answers. Although under the weather, he makes a point to attend the interview to support his older members. “It was good enough to make the title track, so it’s my favorite.”

Chen picks the dreamy “Groove” because: “I love all the other tracks, but this song made me wonder if I could pull it off when I first heard it because it was such a different genre. It was challenging while recording it, but I love the result. It’s one of the songs that I feel most attached to.”

Chanyeol also fell in love with “Jekyll”, but is also partial to the similarly haunting reggae track “Trouble”. “The song came out to be great; I think we pulled it off pretty well,” he says happily.

“‘Day After Day’ for me,” says Baekhyun. While the other members have been discussing their favorites, he’s been silently exchanging silver rings with Suho. He nicks Chanyeol’s wire-rimmed glasses and puts them up his face backwards, reveling in the laughter he receives. “The song reminds me of a certain type of weather. I like songs that remind me of something — a song with a theme or story. ‘Day After Day’ does that for me.”

“I was going to say the same,” Suho says, shocked. A mischievous grin spreads on Baekhyun’s face. “Stop it,” he teases.

The room is whipped into uncontrollable laughter as Suho jokingly grasps the collar of Baekhyun’s sweater, as if he’s about to wrestle the other singer mid-interview. Suho’s faux fury only makes Baekhyun’s smile grow wider and he lets out a loud ahh, ahh! before Suho lets go.

“It reminds me of rain!” Suho complains, but a smile is working its way across his face too. “That’s because the lyrics have the word ‘rain’ in them,” Baekhyun dryly quips. “Choose something other than ‘Day After Day’,” Kai urges in between laughs. “Day after tomorrow? Two days after tomorrow?” The laughter doubles.

In the end, Suho chooses “Baby You Are." “The song uses band sounds and I really like the sound of the guitar,” he answers, before replying in English: “The intro is the best!” He flashes an assured smile and gives a thumbs up to further prove his point.

“The intro is your part!” Chen lovingly chides. “It’s because you sang that part!”

The most emotional track on the album is “Butterfly Effect," which is a direct callback to the group’s 2013 song “Don’t Go” (which literally translates to “Butterfly Girl”). The song, according to Chanyeol, was selected as a way to thank fans for their unwavering support over the last seven years.

“After viewing the different universes portrayed in EXO’s albums, you’ll be able to see a connection between Obsession and our previous records,” Chanyeol says. “In songs like ‘Don't Go’ and ‘Butterfly Effect’, there are butterflies that resist the Red Force [the canonical evil force mentioned throughout EXO’s music videos] and protect EXO. To us, these butterflies represent our fans, who are always beside us no matter what. They are why and how we exist.”

He continues: “Because of our fans — through their love and support — we are able to overcome any difficulties [we face as a group]. This is probably one of the biggest messages that we wanted to share on this album.”

Prior to their debut seven years ago, the members’ goals for the future were heavily built upon their dream to debut together. Chanyeol recalls that, before they were ever officially called EXO, each member was bonded together by a “common goal to create good music as one” as well as their frequent discussions while training to “work together for a very long time."

“At the time of our debut, we had achieved nothing and everything was up in the air. We talked about working together for a long time, hitting number one on the chart, winning awards, and more,” Kai replies, tone contemplative as he leans closer. “Personally speaking, when we eventually achieved all those goals, I realized, yes, winning awards and being successful is important, but more importantly being able to perform happily as an artist is what mattered the most. There were times when I obsessed over our sales record, stages, and something tangible, but now my goal and dream is to be a happy artist, being satisfied with what I do.”

At the end of Kai’s answer, EXO breaks out into a hearty round of applause. Kai bashfully shines on the encouragement with a soft grin. “He’s like a supervisor,” Baekhyun teases. Chanyeol concurs, “He’s like a CEO!”

Looking ahead, EXO’s goals for the upcoming year aren’t the grandiose, tangible achievements of their youth, but rather to keep the promise they made to each other all those years ago: to make music together for a really long time. “I’m wishing all the members’ health and happiness [in the future],” Chen says.

“Being able to perform for a long time as one, being able to meet the fans for a long time…” Kai reflects. “That’s the most important.”

source: emlyn travis @ Teen Vogue

#exo #suho #baekhyun #chen #chanyeol #kai #sehun #t: info

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surveys-at-your-service · 4 years ago

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Survey #430

“when the girl in the corner is everyone’s woman, she could kill you with a wink of her eye”

What kind of dog do you find most ugly? What a mean question. ;-; I don't think they're ugly, but I probably find chihuahuas to be the least visually appealing. Do you like wood floors or carpet better? Wood. Do you think the USA bullies other countries? Quite frankly, yes. Are you currently in love right now? No. Favorite fast food joint? Sonic. What would you do if your ex contacted you? THE ex, have a panic attack. Cry. Be wordlessly ecstatic. Be scared and confused. Do you still have feelings for your ex? Two, yes, but one is unrealistic considering I have no idea who he is anymore. It's been way too long for me to possibly, accurately like him. Ever tasted a flavored condom? No. Do you know CPR? No. How much do you care about your best friend? I'd die for her. Do you watch Dr. Phil? No. What age would you like to have a child? I don't want kids ever. Are your parents wealthy? Mom, absolutely not. Dad seems to be financially stable, but not wealthy or anything. Pick one state you’d love to live in? Alaska. How many pets do you want? And of what? Man, I want a LOT. I know I want more ball python morphs, a plains hognose, a woma python, numerous tarantulas, a fat-tailed gecko, a boa, orchid mantises, a sphynx, a tegu would be super cool... I'd love to have like an empire of pets one day, aha, but only so long as I could maintain them all and adequately provide for them. Have you ever asked someone out? Yes. When do you want to get married? I mean, I don't have a set age in mind. I want to get married when I'm ready. Can you play a musical instrument? I played the flute for yeeeaaaars in middle and high school, but I remember almost nothing by now. What if you stopped orgasming for the rest of your life? Idc, honestly. Does money make you happy? Money probably makes me happier than it should, but I'm not like madly in love with it or anything. Happens when you're poor your whole life. Your favorite breakfast food? Ugh, cinnamon rolls are a godsend. When was the last time you went to a funeral? I actually don't think I've ever been to one... only wakes. I really, really wish I could have gone to Jason's mom's, though... There was just no fucking way that I was going to risk upsetting Jason on THAT day of all days by popping up. Have you ever stolen someone’s boyfriend/girlfriend? Well, we never actually dated, but you could say that... Tell me the date of your first kiss. I don't know the exact date, but it was March 2012. Are your legs long or short? Normal, I guess? How many phobias do you have? Man, a lot. Is there a bookshelf in your room? No. Do you use the Facebook chat often? Barely at all. I only really use it to chat with Girt on the rare occasion we talk. Who got you hooked on the addiction you're addicted to (If you have one)? I discovered Mark on my own; I needed help in an Amnesia: The Dark Descent custom story, so I found his playthrough and watched it. Got a few laughs, subscribed. It was Jason who introduced me to Amnesia, though, so I can indirectly thank him, I guess? haha Are you currently worried about your parents finding out about something? No. Have you ever lived with a friend? Yeah, for a couple months. Have you ever only liked someone because you found out they liked you? No. Ever been on a real diet, or did you just stop eating? I've tried multiple diets. Have you ever known a white supremacist? I know multiple. Welcome to the South. Do you like the smell of a barbecue? Yesss. It's funny because I hate the food itself. Have you ever gone out in public in your pajamas? Yeah. It's not rare, if I'm being honest. How many times have you been to the ER? Too many times because of being suicidal. How many people are you currently texting? None. Anything exciting coming up? My nephew's birthday is in a few days! Would you rather get money or gift cards for your birthday? Money, so I can use it for anything. Do you have Instagram? I have three, ha ha. One for my basic photography, another for my morbid photos, and I went through a very short phase of having an Instagram for my pets. It still exists, but I don't really use it. Have you ever spoken to a detective before? No. Do you believe in ghosts? Yes. Do ladders scare you? Yes. Hot dogs or hamburgers? Cheeseburgers may possibly be my favorite food. Do you have any tattoos on your arms? I do. Have you ever owned or known someone who owned a black cat? I've owned plenty of black cats. What album is the last song you listened to from? It's from Disguise. What’s the last funny movie you watched? Probably Elf. Can you remember your parents’ birthdays? Mom's, yes. I only remember the month of my dad's. If you had to get a tattoo tomorrow, what would you pick? I think I want to get my tribute to Teddy next. How do you feel about band tattoos? Hey, go for it. I see nothing wrong with it. What piercing do you like most on the opposite sex? Probably snakebites. Lip piercings in general are hot lmao. Are you any good at applying make up? Noooo, my hands are so shaky. How old were the last 3 people you kissed? Sara's 23; idr the exact ages of Girt and Tyler. I think Tyler was a year younger than me, and Girt is at the bare minimum three years older than me. If you found out you got someone pregnant, what would you do? Well, I'm a cisgender female, so... Do you ever wonder what your ex is up to? Very frequently. Do you like your cell phone? I mean it's fine, but I'd like a new one. Is rap your favorite genre of music? No, it's actually my least favorite. Have you ever thrown up on anybody? Oh god, no. Do people think you’re happy? I think it's safe to say most people who know me know I'm clinically depressed. Or you know... maybe not. Quite a few people have been surprised to learn that about me because I can put on a good facade. What band would you stand in line for 24 hours to see? None, honestly. That's way too long. What was your worst childhood experience? I guess my dad's alcoholism. As a child, I thought it was a normal thing, but I do wonder if my fear of men has anything to do with how volatile drinking had a 50/50 chance of making him. He never hurt anyone, but he was just so mad and hateful towards the world sometimes. You can trade another person’s emotions for your own. Whose do you take? I have no idea. What was/is going to be your first waltz at your wedding? That'll depend on my partner and what song means the most to us/fits us best. "When It's Love" by Van Halen has been a consideration for forever, though. When it’s not summer, what do you miss most about it? I hate summer. I miss nothing about it. Do you consider yourself patriotic? No. What is the one thing that you need to do to die happy? Feel like I accomplished something notable. Do you consider yourself mainstream? No. What’s the riskiest thing you’ve ever done? Overdosing on cold medicine. What is life’s greatest mystery? Probably from whence we came. Humanity has fished for a definite answer forever. What was your favourite make-believe game as a kid? Pretending I was a meerkat hiding in a "burrow" that was a blanket fort, ha ha. Do you try your best at everything? Honestly, no. Who is your shoulder to cry on? My mom, without fail. What’s your standard excuse for not doing something? I dunno... it depends on the topic. Name the most beautiful person you know. As far as physical appearance goes, my friend Alon. Have you ever been to jail? No. What is one moment you wish you could have taken a picture of? Sara's face when I surprised her at her house for her birthday. It was absolutely fucking priceless. What place holds the most memories for you? Jason's house. Who was your first date? My puppy dog-love middle school bf Aaron. We went with a group of friends to a skating rink. My first one-on-one date was Jason. What’s the best trip you’ve ever been on? The zoo in 5th grade. It's the one and only time I've seen meerkats. For some weird reason, our zoo moved the meerkats not long after that visit. I THINK they said the environment just wasn't suitable for them, which I never really got... I think they mentioned the cold, but like, you have heating for them, and also, have you ever experienced a desert night? You consider all the other areas that have meerkats in their zoos and it's like... why, man. Bring my meerkats back. ;_; What do you think the earth will look like in 1,000 years? Oh dear God, I do NOT want to visualize that. My gut tells me it'll be a wasteland, probably without humans or most forms of life we have now. We have to get our shit straight, so very badly. I could rant for hours about how horribly and ungratefully we abuse our planet. Who makes you happy to be around? Sara! I feel like I can be my 100% authentic self, and we just vibe really well together. Like every time I've been there and she here, our friendship felt so natural and chill. I really, really need to save up for another trip up there. What secret have you tried to hide but it got out anyway? I kept the Joel situation to myself from pretty much everyone, but it eventually came out in front of Mom and Jason. It was actually the night of the breakup; I don't remember how it was relevant at all to mention, but I did in some form. Mom wisely never asked about it, and Jason obviously didn't. I was a stupid 12-year-old anyway, it's whatever now. Who/what is your everything? I will never. Ever. In five billion millennia. Let anyone be that again. How many people have you turned down when they asked you out? Ummm three? I think that's it. How many exes do you have? If I include everyone who ever had a title of "boyfriend/girlfriend," I have six. Who was your worst relationship with? Tyler. It was just pointless and the result of nothing but loneliness. What’s your ‘label’? (ex. punk, prep) I really, really don't care. Do you swear? How much? Like a sailor. I swore some beforehand, but I got really bad when Jason and I started dating. He swore a lot, and his mother did even more. I was around them as much as possible, so it rubbed off on me. What is the one thing that would make everything in your life fall apart? Losing my family, like being disowned or something like that. Especially when it comes to Mom. I rely on her so heavily, as much as I hate that. :/ What takes your breath away? Nature is very capable of that. Something like seeing big waterfalls in the mountains or something would marvel me. Are you patient? No, honestly. Are you a good dancer? No. Even when I took dance, I don't think I was great; however, I do think I was pretty skilled at clogging. Who would you call first in a life-threatening situation (not 911)? My mom. Who do you miss? Jason and his family, Megan, Alex, Hannia, Emily, Journee... a lot of people. Do you like snakes? I adore snakes.

#survey #surveys #random questions #lyrics: ''ballroom blitz'' by 3teeth

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steves-on-a-plane · 5 years ago

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Run. (Pt. 6)

Part One /Part Two / Part Three / Part Four / Part Five

Words: 1265 Pairing: Tony Stark & Reader Timeline: The Avengers [2012] Other Info: Run AU Summary: A month has passed since the Battle Of New York, and Tony decides that it’s about time for Reader to meet the team. So they host a party for the Avengers at their place.

June 2012

“Promise me that you won’t take it personal if some of them don’t come.” You begged Tony. The two of you were in your bedroom getting ready for the party you were throwing to celebrate the Avenger’s first victory as a team.

“If some of them don’t come?” Tony repeated. “Why wouldn’t they come? Who wouldn’t come to a party someone was throwing in their honor? A Stark party no less.” Tony adjusted the tie he’d just knotted around his neck. It was one of his favorites, silk and hot rod red in color. His suit was a simple black one he’d worn it a hundred times, but it fit him nicely.

“Do you think that no one is going to come?” With expert precision he put on his custom-made Iron Man cufflinks. They’d been a birthday gift from you a couple years ago. You’d worked with a jeweler to design these small arch reactors out of sapphires. It was flashy and very Tony and he loved them.

“Gosh, you’re beautiful.” He moved across the room towards you and held your face in his hands. “Have you always been so beautiful?” Tony planted a kiss on your lips.

“Have you always been so cheesy?” You asked him, kissing him again. “Help me zip up my dress so then we can say goodnight to the kids.” You turned around so that your back was to Tony.

“Which sitter did you call again? The one who reads to them in German or the one who won’t let them watch TV?” Tony zipped up your dress.

“I called Clara.” You reminded him. “She’s the one that Eddie loves because she knows all the words to all the Disney songs and Rina loves her because she lets her play with her make up.”

“Clara right. The one who doesn’t drive.” Tony nodded.

You and Tony walked hand in hand to the kid’s playroom. Eddie was sitting on the floor playing with his building blocks, Clara the babysitter was sitting across from him. Serina was sitting in a child sized armchair that she was almost too big for. She was skimming a Harry Potter book, her favorite in the series that she had read multiple times.

“I don’t understand why I can’t come to the party.” Serina looked up from her book when you and Tony entered the room. “I want to meet Tony’s friends too.”

“They’re not my friends, Ballerina, they’re more like…coworkers.” Tony said, kissing his stepdaughter on the forehead. “And I agree with your mom that tonight is not the best night for you guys to be introduced to everyone. At least not yet.”

“Fine.” Serina rolled her eyes. “Can you do me a favor at least?” Serina pulled out two baseball cards from her pockets. They were vintage Captain America ones, just one the ones Phil Coulson had once collected. “A boy in my class, Kevin, He said I could keep one of these if I got them autographed by Captain America. Do you think that you could maybe ask him for me?” She held out the cards to Tony.

“What?” He took the cards from Serina and tucked them in his jacket pocket. “No one wants an autograph of your old man?” He pretended to be offended.

“The kids in my class know I can get your autograph anytime.” Serina rolled her eyes again. “Plus, you’re coming to class next month for career day remember? Can you get me Captain America’s autograph, please?”

“Consider it done.” Tony promised.

You and Tony hugged and kissed your kids goodnight. You both reminded them how much you loved them and promised to come in and check on them throughout the duration of the party. Tony mixed up a set of drinks and slid a chilled glass your way. The penthouse doorbell rang and your first guest had arrived. Tony led them around on an enthusiastic tour until they joined you in the living room.

“Doctor Bruce Banner I would like you to meet my absolutely gorgeous and intelligent wife, [Y/N].” Bruce Banner crossed the room and offered you a hand to shake. Tony slipped out of the room as the doorbell rang again.

“It’s wonderful to finally meet the illusive Mrs. Stark.” Bruce said, as you shook his hand. “The team is really excited to introduce themselves. Tony’s done a pretty good job of keeping you away from us thus far.”

“With good reason, Dr. Banner. We don’t invite just anyone into our family.” You commented, sipping from your drink.

“You know, Tony this is exactly the kind of place I pictured you living in.” A new voice joined you in the living room. “Ah, you must be Mrs. Stark.” Steve Rogers looked exactly like the photos and artist sketches you’d grown up seeing in museums and history books. His chiseled chin was a bit softer than photos could capture and his eyes were softer, more inviting but he was every bit the Captain America of legends.

“Oh, please just, [Y/N], I insist.” You invited, shaking hands with the Captain. “Actually, while you’re here, there’s something I have to show you. Come along Doctor Banner you too.”

“Oh, Sweetheart they don’t want to see that…” Tony called out. You ignored him and led your guests out of the room. In the main hallway just off the living room there was a poster you wanted to show Captain Rogers.

“When we first got married, I went through storage and I had a bunch of Howard and Tony’s schematics and drawings framed.” You Gestured to the walls where the invention designs were hanging.

“The first year is paper anniversary.” Dr. Banner recalled.

“I remember this one. Saw it in person.” Captain Rogers pointed to one of Howard’s drawings. It was the blueprint for a flying car.

“But the crown jewel in our poster collection and what I wanted you to see, is this original 1940s propaganda poster of a certain Captain. See Tony won’t admit this to anyone but growing up he had one hero.” You arrived at the poster and stepped aside to let Steve and Bruce see it.

“Is this an original?” Captain Rogers started to reach out to touch the poster, but still a few inches for even though the poster was protected with glass. “I mean not a printed copy, that’s a real pen and ink sketch?” He asked excitedly. You wouldn’t find out until much later that Steve loved art.

“I think it’s pencil, but yes. It seems Howard kept quite a few of the preliminary designs. They’re worth thousands, especially ones like this design that never ended up being mass produced. We have a few extras; I’ll have to have one sent to you.” You decided. “But I wanted you to see this because you’re all a team.” You looked away from the photo to Steve and Bruce. “And if you’re Tony’s team, then you’re his family. He’s going to treat you like his family whether you want him to or not. And if you’re Tony’s family, that makes you my family. Tony can be eccentric, he can be difficult, but he’s also the most loyal person you’ll ever meet. You two seem like you have the best heads on your shoulders so I’m trusting my husband’s safety to you two. You make sure he comes home after every mission. I know he’s going to get hurt doing what you do, so you promise me that when he does, I’m the first call you make. Am I clear?”

“Yes Ma’am.” Steve gulped.

#Tony Stark #Tony Stark x Reader #Tony Stark Reader Insert #Tony Stark FF #Tony Stark Fan Fiction #Tony Stark Fan Fic #Run.#Run AU

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dailyexo · 6 years ago

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[INTERVIEW] EXO - 191220 Teen Vogue: K-Pop Stars EXO Reflect on How Far They've Come — and How Far They'll Go

"As Chen tells Teen Vogue, this year has been “a time for EXO to reflect” on their past, present, and future.

As Chen tells Teen Vogue, this year has been “a time for EXO to reflect” on their past, present, and future as they reunite to promote their sixth album Obsession.

Amongst the members, X-EXO wins in a landslide over the team they liked the most.

“I was going to say the same,” Suho says, shocked. A mischievous grin spreads on Baekhyun’s face. “Stop it,” he teases.

“The intro is your part!” Chen lovingly chides. “It’s because you sang that part!”

“Being able to perform for a long time as one, being able to meet the fans for a long time…” Kai reflects. “That’s the most important.”"

Photo links: 1, 2, 3

Credit: Teen Vogue.

#EXO #EXO K #EXO M #191220 #exo im #exo k im #exo m im #p:news #t:news #fs:teen vogue #comeback:Obsession

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spideyy-girl · 6 years ago

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Hope ~ Peter Parker (pt. III)

Summary: Y/N gears up and gets ready to go into battle, determined as ever to get her best friend and the love of her life, Peter Parker, back to her after 5 long years without him.

Fandom: MCU

Warnings: bit of swearing as per usual, depictions of violence, fighting, blood, death, and other gory scenes, angst and fluffy at the end. THIS DOES NOT FOLLOW MCU CANON! EVERYONE WHO HAS BEEN SNAPPED WAS AGED THE SAME AS THOSE WHO WEREN’T, SO PETER IS STILL THE SAME AGE OF Y/N, AND THEY ARE BOTH AROUND 21!!!!

Word Count: 10100 (28 pages wOAh)

A/N: finally, the long-awaited finale for Hope is here! Thanks to everyone who showed so much support for this series I love every single one of you honestly! Lmk if you guys want an epilogue? cause I don’t wanna be done with this series yet lol

If you haven’t read the first two parts, I would suggest looking through them before reading this!

PART 1 ~ PART 2 ~ MASTERLIST

~~~

Y/N walked towards the large platform in the middle of the room with the remaining of the Avengers, all in their rather cool looking matching time heist suits. She had to admit that she felt pretty badass, walking alongside the world’s mightiest heroes, going off to save the world like it was any other Tuesday for them.

After the young girl found out the formula of time travel and showed it to Tony, they had created a steady device and explained the idea to the team, which everyone quickly agreed with. They had been split up into three teams to go back in time and gather all six infinity stones before Thanos could find or use them. The teams were split up into Natasha, Clint, Nebula and Rhodey to get the soul and power stones, Thor, and Rocket to get the reality stone (or ether I guess), and Scott, Bruce, Tony, Steve and Y/N to get the Time, Mind, and Space stones.

The team now stood on the platform, putting their hands together as Steve performed his motivational speech, Y/N clung onto every word, still shocked that she got to suit up with them, and also a bit nervous. But she knew that she had the proper training if it came to it and if worse comes to worst, she has a quick solution handy in her pocket, one that she’s been carrying around for years.

“One round trip each. No mistakes, no do-overs,” Cap spoke as he looked around at everyone in the circle. “Most of us are going to a place we know; that doesn’t mean we should know what to expect. Be careful, look out for each other.” Y/N looked beside her up at Tony, who smiled reassuringly at her. “This is the fight of our lives, and we’re gonna win. Whatever it takes.” Steve finished his speech as they separated hands. Y/N looked over at Nat and gave her a smile, to which she returned.

“See you in a minute,” she says winking over at her mentee. She rolled her eyes but laughed. Suddenly the machine above them started to whir and spin around, and the mask on Y/N’s suit came up to cover her face. She felt her breathing start to go heavy but soon relaxed as Tony gave her hand a squeeze. She felt her body being compressed down into the size of an atom and swept away into the quantum realm, trying to control herself and following the lead of Tony just in front of her.

Before she knew it her feet hit the ground below her and her knees buckled from underneath her. As she regained her balance and looked up, her eyes went wide as she took in the scene in front of her. Just a few feet away, she saw the original Avengers, formed in a circle and gearing up for the infamous battle of 2012 against Loki. Y/N almost let out a squeal, remembering watching them do their work on the news when she was younger.

“You alright there?” Tony asked as he gave the girl a teasing smile. “You look like you’re about to explode.” Y/N shook her head but smiled back.

“Yeah I just, wow I was such a fan of you guys when I was younger,” she said as she watched on as they parted ways and did their own thing to take down as many aliens as possible. She then looked back up at Tony and smirked, one that reminded him of himself. “You guys were so much cooler back then. Now you’re all like, big old grampa’s.”

“Woah!” Tony said, giving her a playful look of pain as he grabbed his heart as if she had stabbed him with her comment. “Ouch, you know I understand why you would say that for Cap, cause he’s literally like, 100 years old but for me?”

“Guys we have to focus here,” Bruce caught their attention before Y/N could come back with another snarky comeback. “God sometimes I wonder how the two of you arent’s related, you’re like the same person nowadays.” Tony rolled his eyes, looking back out onto the street.

Before they could try and cross the street to get to the Stark Tower, a giant and raging green Hulk came down from the ground, pounding robots into the ground and flinging them around like ragdolls. As the group looked back at Bruce he covered his face, embarrassed of what he used to be. Steve told Bruce and Scott to find Dr. Strange and the time stone while he, Tony, and Y/N went up to the Stark tower to get the mind and space stone. As they got in and saw the past Avengers, Steve departed to get Loki’s staff, containing the mind stone, while Tony and Y/N worked on getting the Tesseract.

Y/N hid out in a small conference room out of sight, since Tony didn’t want her directly participating in the mission, much to her demise. She opened her laptop, which she disguised as a briefcase. She quickly typed in the password before pulling up multiple programs on the small screen, including a camera view from Tony’s glasses and a controller for a small robotic device she’d use to slip around without being realized.

“You sure this is gonna work, kid?” Tony asked quietly through the comm, causing Y/N to roll her eyes.

“Yes, Tony. I’ve been working on this model forever, I know what I’m doing,” she sassed back, looking through a small camera on the spider-shaped device she originally created with Peter. “Just remember I’m the reason we’re all here. I’m not just a pretty face, Stark.”

“Yeah yeah,” he mumbled as he watched his past self pack up the Tesseract in a briefcase. “Ok, spider-girl, release your little spiderling.” He says dramatically as the spider crawls from his pocket and makes its way onto the roof. Y/N chuckled at the nickname before focusing on controlling the spider-robot, the decoy lowering itself onto past Tony’s shoulder without anyone noticing. She couldn’t help but let out a little squeal at her excellent work. She watched through the small cam as the Avengers (excluding Hulk, who was told to take the stairs) made their way into the foyer of the building.

Tony watched along as his past self walks along with the other original Avengers and Loki. Alexander Pierce and his crew walked towards them as present-day Tony gave Y/N the signal to drop down. Y/N dropped the spider drone into Tony’s beard and then down onto his chest, the almost microscopic robot slipping through and into his arc reactor. She explores for a while until she finds what Tony had told her would cause the distraction.

“Is this really a good idea, Stark?” Y/N asked worriedly, not thinking of the consequences until then.

“Yeah, sure. It’ll only cause me to go into a tiny cardiac distract,” Tony stated casually, and Y/N’s eyes widened immediately, stopping the robot.

“What?!” She says, shaking her head. “Okay, no. No no no no no. I’m not gonna do this, we can figure out something else it’ll be fine.”

“Y/N, hey, calm down,” Tony says, his voice going lower. “Don’t worry, I’ll be fine. I mean I’m still here, so that’s gotta mean something right? If I died I wouldn’t be here.” Y/N scoffed at his words, but still, her hands were shaking, not wanting to hurt someone she had gotten so close to. She couldn’t bear if anything happened to him.

“No shit, Sherlock,” she whispers back into the comm, but loud enough for him to hear it. He rolled his eyes and continued to watch as Pierce tried to snatch the case away from his hands. “Time’s running out, Y/N. Pull my pin!”

“Okay, okay, give me a second.” She said as she maneuvered the tiny device to the said area with a small pin that helped keep everything in the arc reactor together. “But if you die, Tony, it’ll be your funeral. Literally.” She comments back to try and defuse the tension she felt. He quietly gave her another reassurance before giving the signal. With the small metal pinchers, Y/N pulled the cord in the arc reactor and through the other camera through Tony’s glasses she saw past Tony fall to the floor just as Pierce was taking the case containing the Tesseract from his hands.

The metal case fell to the floor with a hard clank and 2012 Tony followed soon after it, shaking slightly on the floor. Pierce and his crew members, as well as the other Avengers there, kneeled down beside him and tried to figure out what was wrong.

The small metallic robot climbed out from Tony’s reactor and pushed the case over to Tony, who was disguised as a staff of security. He discreetly picked it up and began walking away from the scene as medics began rushing to help the famous billionaire on the floor. What they didn’t know was that they weren’t as discreet as they thought.

“Good job, kid. Meet me in the alley, I’m gonna-” but was cut off as a big green angry hulk burst through the door, knocking down Tony and flinging the tesseract out of its case and down the hallway. The bright blue square landed right at the feet of Loki, who looked down and quickly picked it up, using its powers to teleport him out of the tower as people were too distracted running in terror.

Thor tapped his hammer against Tony’s chest, causing him to stop shaking and blink frantically, looking at his surroundings. “Where’s the case?” Y/N heard him ask. Her face dropped as she moved to drone to look all around the room, finding no clue where the Tesseract or Loki himself was.

“Fuck this,” she mumbled, working her computers to try and get into the security tapes, looking for what might’ve happened to either of them. “That wasn’t supposed to happen, was it?"

Tony sat himself up on his elbows looking around to see people screaming and running away from the Hulk, who was screaming about no stairs, and to his other side, officers looking for Loki and the Tesseract. “Shit.”

Y/N quickly packed up her computers and put them back into her bag, running out to meet Tony at the alleyway where they had come in. She found an abandoned car parked beside it and saw Tony already sitting in its head in his hand as he observed the destruction outside.

“What the hell happened, Stark?” She said as she got into the back seat. “We had the Tesseract, where did it go?” Tony sighed, closing his eyes as he responded, trying to keep calm.

“I don’t know what happened, Y/N,” he said tensely. “I know we had it but now we don’t, okay? Something happened, I don’t know what.”

“Well, you better fucking figure it out!” She yelled, her ears going red as she got more angry by him not seeming to care. “Did you not hear what Cap said? No do-overs! We fucked up so what are we gonna do now!”

“I don’t know what we’re gonna do!” He screamed back turning to face her. He sighed, running a hand down his face and closed his eyes. He stayed silent for a bit, using the silence to calm himself down. He knew she was only acting like this because she was scared. And honestly, he was too. “But we’ll figure something out. I promise. Everything will be okay.”

Y/N gulped to hold back her screaming, not wanting to rant to him about every little thing that had already gone wrong, and how she was starting to lose hope. Then Cap jumped down from a balcony, one hand propping up the shield while the other gripped Loki’s staff.

“Cap,” Tony caught his attention. Steve saw them in the dirt-covered car as he walked towards them. “We’ve got a bit of a problem here.” Y/N scoffed, shaking her head as she let her stress get the better of her again.

“A bit of a problem?” She asked sarcastically. “More like we’re in deep shit!” She said getting out of the car and slamming the door shut with surprising force. Tony rolled his eyes. Steve looked between the two, his eyebrows scrunching up in confusion.

“What happened?” he asked, looking at Y/N. She laughed ironically, starting to pace along the alleyway.

“We lost the goddamn Tesseract is what happened!” She said as she aggressively kicked a piece of debris on the ground. “It’s gone and now the plan isn’t gonna work. We don’t have enough Pym particles to go back again. It’s over, we’re done.” She leaned down and sat against the wall, leaning her head back.

“Are there any other options with the Tesseract,” Steve asked, causing Y/N to roll her eyes at his always enthusiastic goody-two-shoes energy.

“No. No there’s not,” she said annoyed as she stood up and walking over to him. “You said it yourself, there are no do-overs. If we use that last Pym particle, we’re never getting home.”

“Well, if we don’t try, no one else is going home either,” he stated. Y/N sighed, squeezing her eyes shut as she leaned against the car. She knew he was right. But what was the use of going back again to get the stone if they couldn’t get back in the present to put it in the gauntlet?

“I got it,” Tony said suddenly, getting out of the car. Y/N’s head shot up as she stood up and followed him as he got out of the car himself. “There’s another way to get the Tesseract and acquire new particles. We’ll take a stroll down memory lane. Military installation Garden State.”

“Why were they both there?” Steve asked, causing Y/N to look between the two as they continued their conversation. Tony shrugged.

“They were both there for a…” he trailed off as he thought. “I have a vaguely exact idea,” he defended himself. Cap gave him a look, the same one he gave Y/N when he caught her doing something she shouldn’t have around the compound or when she sasses one of the other team members a bit too much.

“How vague,” he asked.

“Woah, okay, what’s going on?” Y/ finally butted in. “What are you guys talking about? Where are we going?” She asked eagerly as they started entering in the time date and coordinates.

“Correction, we’re going. You’re travelling back to the present to give this to the others,” Tony said as he handed her Loki’s staff. Her eyes bulged out as she stood up straighter.

“Tony, I can help. I’m not letting you guys go alone, I’m coming with you,” she stated strongly as she put her suit up. Tony shook his head.

"I trust you with this, kid, okay? get back to home base, we’ll be there by the time you get back.” He said as he and Steve put up their own suits. He took her hand and entered in the present-day coordinates to get back home as she looked at him like he was crazy, which she currently felt he was.

“What?! But Tony-!” She started, but before Y/N could argue, she felt the ground sweep from under her feet and she was being sent back to the present day, Loki’s staff still held tightly in her hand.

As she regained her balance, she looked around the room, seeing that everyone had their respective stone’s, including Tony with the Tesseract. But something seemed off. She did another swift headcount of everyone and realized someone had to be missing.

“Where’s Nat?” She asked, looking around at everyone’s confused faces before looking at Clint, whose eyes were red and glassy. She watched as he looked up at her, shaking his head slightly as a fresh tear rolled down his face. Y/N felt her chest tighten as her mouth opened slightly, letting out a shuttering breath. She knew that face, she wore the same expression five years ago.

She felt tears well up into her eyes, not even thinking of losing a mentor, someone she considered family during the process of getting those who were snapped away back. She felt tears starting to form in her own eyes as regret and sadness took over the whole team.

~~~

The team had taken a quick break to take a moment to mourn their friend, to some even their family. It was odd to not have Natasha around, making small sarcastic quips at any person in the room when you’d least expect it. Y/N quickly splashed her face with water, making the tears on her face earlier vanish as she went back into the room where Tony had just completed the infinity gauntlet 2.0 and everyone was arguing over who should snap their fingers.

“What do you think is coursing through my veins right now?” She heard as she exited the ladies bathroom just beside the room. She leaned against the doorframe as she answered.

“Cheez Whiz?” she asked sarcastically as she came up to stand in between the god and Tony. Thor looked down, confusion on his face as he pointed at her and she, in return, gave him a sly smile.

“Lightning,” he emphasized. Y/N sucked in a breath and averted her gaze as he looked expectantly at Tony, who let out a sigh as he pinched his eyebrows together in concentration.

“Lightning won’t help you, pal. It’s gotta be me,” she heard Bruce say from behind her as he walked to the group. She listened intently as he continued. “You saw what those stones did to Thanos; it almost killed him. None of you would survive.”

“Well, how will we know if you will?” Cap said seriously. Y/N looked at Tony, who looked down at her and gave her a knowing glance, that showed he knew it was true. Y/N nodded slightly as Bruce continued.

“We don’t. But the radiation is mostly gamma. It’s… it’s like I was made for this.” The team looked around before Tony stepped out and started explaining the rules of the stones.

“Remember, everyone Thanos snapped away five years ago, we’re just bringing them back to now. Don’t change anything from the past five years,” he said and Bruce nodded, looking at his arm which he prepared to hold the gauntlet in.

The team around him suited up. Y/N felt the cool nanotech of her newly modelled suit slide over her skin, occasionally catching a thin hair. The spiderman-inspired outfit was of the colours white, black, and magenta, with fine reflective webbing details along the side of her arms, legs and torso. She stood behind Tony as he created a protective shield in front of them and Clint on the other side of him.

Metallic barn doors shut around all doors and windows in the room and around the compound. Bruce put on the glove holding the infinity stones and immediately began to scream in pain, doubling down to the ground as he struggled to push his fingers together to snap.

“Take it off! Take it off!” Thor said as he stepped towards Banner, who was still struggling to stay upright. Steve held out his hand to Thor as a sign to stop.

“No, wait! Bruce, are you okay?” Steve asked as he looked at the green giant. Bruce continued to moan but nodded slightly. Y/N stood back further as she heard Banner scream loudly and saw his fingers coming closer together and finally the sound of the metal hitting metal in the snap.

There was a surge of power that almost knocked her over, stumbling to catch her balance. She heard a loud thump as Bruce’s body finally collided with the floor, unconscious. Many people ran towards him to help but Y/N just looked around. She felt her feet carry her to the window as they opened again, seeing birds chirping happily outside.

“D-did it work?” Y/N mumbled as the mask of her suit disappeared from around her face. Everyone turned to look at where she was, seeing multiple new birds coming into sight, planting themselves on a nearby sapling. A phone started to ring, and Clint walked over to his cell vibrating on the glass table, a picture of his beloved wife displayed on the screen. He picked it up and started talking to her.

Tony walked over to Y/N, placing a comforting hand on her shoulder, bringing her attention over to him. He wore a giant smile and even looked like he was in tears. He squeezed her shoulder as she let out a gasp, hand covering her mouth as the biggest smile spread across her soft features. She laughed softly, in disbelief but so happy. Tony matched her actions and pulled her into the biggest hug, and she felt comfortable as she placed her head on his chest.

“We did it, kid,” he mumbled into her messy hair, feeling her locks dampen with his tears. “We finally did it. They’re back.” Y/N laughed again into his suit as she pulled him closer and hugged him tighter, closing her eyes as she felt true relief finally wash over her entire being. But of course, that wouldn’t last for long.

Next thing she knew she was being flung across the compound while a missile hit just outside the window. She felt herself fly through multiple layers of brick and glass, piercing her skin and knocking the breath from her lungs. She coughed heavily as the dust from the rubble entered her system, trying to balance herself enough to stand up and analyze the situation.

“Tony?!” She screamed, looking for the older man that she was just in contact with. “Tony?! Cap?! Thor?!” She screamed any name that came to mind, hoping for someone to hear her, and possibly give her an explanation. She was limping, pain shooting through her ankle whenever she out the slightest pressure on it. It was definitely broken. She felt the metallic taste of blood entering her mouth, and she was scared to say she didn’t know where it came from, her now bleeding nose or the small cuts that littered her cheeks and lips.

“Y/N?” She heard a voice say and sighed with relief. From the dust came Clint, holding something in his arms, the Infinity Gauntlet. “Hey, I got you, you’re okay,” He reassures her as he puts an arm across her back and under her arms, supporting her weight so she can walk. “Tony, I’m with the kid, she seems okay.”

“Is he okay?” she asked quietly when Clint found a safe spot. He looked at her and nodded.

“yeah he’s fine, but almost had a heart attack when he couldn’t find you,” he says, offering her a smile before his face went stoic again. “But he’s here. Thanos. He found us.” Y/N’s eyes went wide, her eyebrows furrowing into a line of confusion. She blinked a couple of times as she processed the new information.

“What? But– but Thanos i-is dead? He’s dead! You said he was dead!” She screams as she feels her heart rate quicken, her breath refusing to meet her lips as if it was stuck inside her throat. Clint reached down and held her hand, rubbing his thumb against the back of her hands as a calming method he has seen Tony use on her before.

“I know, I thought he was gone too,” he whispered, looking back at the dark tunnel before turning back to her. “But this is a different Thanos, he followed us from the past.” Y/N felt her throat close up, dark thoughts filling her mind. Fuck. This was all her fault.

There was a sound that came from down the tunnel, almost like a snarl. The pair went quiet, looking towards the source. Clint slowly took out an arrow from the collection he kept on his back, placing it in his bow and shooting it straight down the line, the end glowing up– revealing about ten or twelve alien-looking dogs. Y/N let out a breath as the two scurried to get up. Clint held up her weight as they ran, eventually settling to pick her up as he ran from the dogs.

As they came to a split in the road, Clint threw her to a different path, signalling for her to run and hide as he continued to run down the other path, provoking the dogs to follow him and leave her. Y/N limped down the path, using the wall to support her as she hopped along. Soon she came across a mop of messy hair frantically looking around the rubble.

“Tony,” she tried to say but found that her voice was scratchy and weak. “Tony, I’m right here.” The said man turned around the stress on his face leaving as he saw the girl he was looking for. He quickly wrapped an arm around as Clint had earlier and walked her away from the scene.

“God, hey kid. You hanging in there?” He said, checking the area before leading her to a small space of coverage under a piece of rubble that looked like it used to be the floor. She nodded in reassurance before grabbing his arm and pulling him back up.

“I need you to take me to our lab, now,” she said urgently and he obliged, not even thinking of asking why. He directed her to a small metal door attached to a broken piece of wall, typing in a code on the damaged keyboard before pushing the heavy doors open.

She rushed over to her part of the lab, the barely working glass screen table popping up and she quickly punched in a few passwords before looking in a locked drawer for one of the small viles kept safely there. Tony looked from her face to the small tube, confusion painting his face as he watched her pop the lid, hesitating before bringing it to her lips and gulping down the small amount of dark red liquid.

Y/N felt the iron tasting liquid slid down her throat as she swallowed it uncomfortably, immediately feeling the effects. Her eyesight went black and her head started to spin. She went to grab the nearest object her hold herself up, the dizziness and broken ankle not being the best combination. Tony rushed to her side, grabbing her other arm.

“Y/N, what the hell was that,” Tony said, concern laced his voice as he watched the girl groan, squeezing her eyes shut and throwing her head back. She gulped before answering in short breaths.

“That answer may vary between poison and what I like to call a spider-serum,” she replied, sarcasm still in use through her pain. Tony looked at her with bewilderment in his eyes, as this was not a project approved by him or not even one they’ve talked about. She gritted her teeth together, continuing to moan out in pain as she collapsed to the floor, Tony calling out her name.

As Y/N got her self together, she placed both hands on the desk in front of her nailed into the floor, using it to pull herself back on her feet. She felt everything in her body changing, she could hear the blood rushing through her veins, she could smell the smoke from across the battlefield outside the reinforced metal door, she could feel the small hairs on Tony’s arms tickling her own as he tried to shake her out of her trance.

“Y/N! Kid come on, snap out of it. What the hell was that?” He said as he continued to shake her. She was going to bring a hand up to slap his own away but instead found them stuck to the table. As she tried tugging again, the steal table breaking off the floor while still sticking to her hands. Y/N and Tony looked in shock.

Y/N then began to laugh, her eyes wide in disbelief. She widened her hands and the desk fell from her palms, crashing against the floor. “Holy shit,” she whispered as she looked at Tony, who was looking from the now broken table to her. “It worked! Oh god, I can’t believe it actually worked!” She screamed as she jumped up and down and headed towards the door.

“No no no, what the hell was that?!” Tony asked. Y/N rolled her eyes, still smiling as she impatiently grabbing his arm and dragged him outside towards the fight. She smiled at him, a great look of success overgoing her as she showed him the potion she had been perfecting for the last couple of years.

“Well, I took a blood sample of Peter’s and checked it to see what kind of stuff the spider had injected into him,” she said as Tony gave her a weird look. “Don’t ask how I got it, I don’t really know either. But as I analyzed it further, I had an idea to take the sample and separate the effects of the injection, and used it to create a serum that would give me powers similar to Peter’s, using the poison of his spider to create powers of my own.”

Tony looked at her mesmerized, then looked at the stash of dark red vials in the drawer. He lifted his eyebrows and nodded, impressed beyond words of the young girl’s discovery. Then he paused and looked back at her. “Wait, so you technically drank spiderboy’s blood?” He asked suspiciously. Y/N opened her mouth to respond but didn’t quite know how.

“I-” she paused, closing her eyes and shaking her head. “Okay, no, we don’t have time for this conversation right now. There’s a giant purple grape out that waiting to be slain.” Tony nodded and soon the two headed out the door without any further questions, saluting each other before Y/N darted off at an irregularly fast tempo.

She felt the wind blow rapidly against her hair as she ran through the bad guys, dodging hits with swiftness. Of course, she wasn’t fast like Pietro but definitely was faster than she usually was, which proved to be a great advantage while on the battlefield. Y/N saw Tony, Thor and Steve fighting against Thanos in the background as she thwiped out a web and flew into the air, grabbing one of the Chiari and slamming it into another group coming towards her.

She continued to fight when suddenly she felt a tingly sense that made her head shoot towards Steve, watching as he stood up by himself, his shield broken in his hand, as he prepared to single-handedly fight the titan. Y/N ran towards him when she heard a voice in her comm, that definitely wasn’t from anyone on their battlefield.

“On your left…”

She seemed to distantly recognize the voice but couldn’t quite place it. That is until a portal appeared beside Steve, made of orange sparks that she had remembered. There, the king of Wakanda, T'Challa, his younger sister, Shuri she thought her name was, and another girl who was dressed in a warriors uniform and a shaved head, holding a golden spear stood beside the king.

After that, portal after portal began to form around the atmosphere, with more battleships, superheroes and warriors of all kinds of countries and galaxies appearing through them and getting into their battle positions. Y/N smiled proudly before running up to the giant team and taking her place next to the Wakandian princess, lunging down into the iconic spidey stance and getting ready to avenge the rest of the universe. She looked at Steve as he watched everyone take their places among him.

“Avengers…” he starts as he holds out his hand and Mjolner flies into his grip. “Assemble!”

Battle cries and the sound of machines whirring and flying filled the atmosphere as they ran towards the alien army opposite of them. Y/N flicked out her wrist and grabbed onto one of the giants floating motherships and swung low to the ground, knocking out multiple enemies at once. Once she landed on the ground she continued to fist fight them off of her one by one, like Natasha had taught her for so many years.

But as good as she was doing at the moment, it wasn’t hard for her to get overpowered when a bunch jumped on her back at once, knocking her down to the floor, struggling to keep them from ripping out her skin. She tried to push them off, and successfully webbed some to the ground to keep them off of her, but it wasn’t enough to handle them all.

“Hey, watch out!” A boyish voice sounded through her comms as all the aliens were kicked right off of her, giving her a chance to stand up and fight off the rest, her rescuer standing behind her, back to back, as they both slung down the dogs and threw them across the battlefield. Y/N stabbed some with her pincer things Tony put on her back.

Once they were gone, Y/N grabbed the boy behind her and pulled him into a quieter place as she unmasked herself, looking expectantly at the boy. “Peter?” She said, her voice breaking as she looked at the Iron Spider suit, which disappeared from his face, revealing his unruly curls and a just as shocked look on his face.

“Y/N?” He whispered, disbelief in his eyes as she saw a single tear escape his brown orbs and gently slide down his cheek. He looked the same, but at the same time looked more mature, and she was relieved that he had seemed to grow while he was gone, or else the near future situation would be a bit awkward. “W-what are you doing here?” Y/N giggled a bit, feeling her own hot tears sliding down her dirt and blood covered cheek as her delicate hand went up to grab his own, wiping his tears.

“I came to save you, dummy,” she joked. Peter smiled at her, placing his hands on her waist. Although it wasn’t as long for Peter in the soul stone as it was for Y/N while on Earth since he was in a coma-like state pretty much the whole time, he had missed her honey-coated voice and sickly sweet smile. He had waited too long for this.

They watched each other for a little longer, analyzing the small details that had changed around their faces since the years passed before Peter leaned down and attached their lips together for a very long-awaited kiss. Y/N squeezed her eyes shut as her hands trailed back to rest on the back of his neck, playing with the small hairs at the nape of his neck as she felt the cold metal of his suit brush against her fingertips.

As they parted, he leaned down and pressed his forehead to hers, her sweat mixing with his as they kept their eyes closed and smiled at the feeling. Even though they were in the middle of a war, Y/N has never felt more at peace than that moment while she was in his arms.

Suddenly she felt the fine hairs on the back of her arm and the back of her neck stand up, and without thinking she extended her arms and traps the alien running towards them in one of her webs, throwing it up before pulling it back down to the ground, crushing it.

Apparently, Peter felt it too because when she looked back to him he was already looking back at the now-dead dog. His head turned back towards her, his mouth hanging open a bit as he let out a breath, a beautiful smile painting his lips as he grabbed her face, looking her in the eye.

‘God, I love you so much,“ he mumbles as he brings her mouth up to his again, this kiss a bit more passionate than the last. Y/N laughed into the kiss as she brought her arms around his neck and played with his hair. She pulled him back a bit, their noses still brushing against one another as she pecked him on the lips.

"I love you too,” she whispered, looking into his eyes with such adoration he almost exploded right there with the adrenaline he was feeling just having her this close to him. He smiled wider as he pecked her on the lips; once, twice, and a third time brought her into a proper kiss.

“Y'know as heartwarming as this moment is, you lovebirds realize we’re still fighting a war,” someone said from behind them. They quickly pulled away, stepping back from one another to face Tony Stark, a smirk on his lips as he examined the blush on the young adult’s faces, bashfully looking away from one another.

“Oh shut it, Tony. I deserve this at least,” she shook her head as she looked at the perfect boy beside her, someone she had known pretty much her whole life and had been in love with for just as long. Peter smiled at Tony and walked over to greet him, excited to see his mentor again after so long.

“Mr. Stark! Holy cow you will not believe what has happened to me,” Peter began to ramble as he walked up to him and started to do his usual over-exaggerated hand gestures. “Do you remember when we were in space? Right? And I got all dusty? Well I must have passed out and Dr. Strange said we went to the Soul Stone and we were in like a coma for like five years, and when I woke up, Dr. Strange was there too and he was like 'it’s been five years we have to go’, and then he started doing that yellow sparkly thingy, uh, that he does and… what are you doing? …oh.” Peter stopped when Tony wrapped his arms around him and pulled him into a tight embrace.

Tony felt such a great sense of relief as he hugged Peter, never realizing that the kid was like his first son until it was too late and having to wait so many years to hear his voice again. He placed a kiss on his cheek, in a fatherly way, and opened his eyes, smiling at Y/N who looked so happy.

“This is nice,” Peter said before they pulled away, Peter turned back at Y/N and smiled at her, his grin reaching his sparkling eyes. Tony patted his shoulder.

“I think it’s time we get back into battle,” he stated, his mask going back over his face as he got his repulsors ready. “You two don’t take too long, and NO funny business.” The pair nodded as he flew back into the air, going to help Banner or the Hulk. Peter turned back to Y/N.

“Wow, this is so awesome,” he said as he walked back to her, holding her arms as he admired her suit, which looked similar to his. “You’re like, my spider-girl sidekick.” Y/N laughed and pushed his chest playfully.

“I’m nobody’s sidekick, Parker,” she said. “But I can be your… partner?” Peter smiled and blushed. He bit his lip as he looked her over again, his grin contagious.

“In what way?” He asked, trying to sound sly but sounding more scared of the answer. Y/N laughed and walked over to him, wrapping her arms around his waist.

“In whatever way you want me to be,” she said, kissing his cheek before putting her mask back on and saluting him before swinging of back into battle. Peter stood there with a red blush crawling up his neck and feeling breathless, his smile growing wider if that was even possible.

“Awesome,” he muttered before his mask also went over his face and he went to go help as well.

Y/N was swinging over the battle, occasionally knocking out an airborne enemy in her way if she had to. She scanned through the people fighting, looking for anyone who needed help. But then her web was seemed to be disintegrated as she fell hard onto the floor, another lazer like beam hit right beside her just barely grazing her shoulder. She saw the witch people? (that’s what Tony called them at least) started to make barriers which she quickly ran under. She looked around for Tony and Peter, but couldn’t see them. Until she heard the latter’s voice through her comm.

“Help! Somebody help!” He said, sounding panicked and she heard his grunts as he tried to fight off the aliens. Without thinking of the possible dangers she ran out to help him, her spider-senses helping her locate him. She saw him under a bunch of the aliens and shot a web up.

“Peter, duck!” She said as she rammed through the enemies, knocking them over like bowling pins. She grabbed Peter around the waist and tugged him into her as she shot a web and took them out, grabbing onto Mjloner which had flown right above.

“Aw, thanks, Y/N,” Peter said as he put his head into her neck, which she couldn’t help but blush at. She thought it was cute how their roles were sort of reversed and he was just so baby.

Y/N continued to ride onto the hammer until she saw that it was heading straight towards one of the flying motherships. Her eyes went wide as she looked for a way to get off. She saw Valkerye, one of Thor’s friends, and called out for her as a warning before throwing Peter up so he could get the gauntlet back to Scott.

Y/N then stood on the small handle of the hammer before using her web to fling herself forward, jumping up to get on top of the ship as the hammer continued to destroy it from the inside. As she jumped off and landed surprisingly gracefully on the ground, she looked up to realize that the ships were no longer firing at them, but at something in the atmosphere above.

Y/N squinted before watching a figure move at lightning speed straight through one of the ships firing at them, exploding the whole thing. Y/N smiled, knowing who it was as she ran down to help Peter up, who had just almost been hit by one of the beams.

“Hey, you alright?” She asked softly as she grabbed his arm and helped him get up, him going to get the gauntlet which had escaped his grip after falling. He nodded, his mask going back as hers did.

“Yeah, yeah, all good,” he reassured as he held onto her shoulder for support. “That was so badass, by the way. When I was like, stuck, you know, under those aliens. And then you came and was like wham! and like kicked them off and then you just sorta like picked me up and then you just like threw me onto that flying horse, which is crazy. But you like saved me and that was so cool. Like really cool. Thanks.” Peter rambled as he looked at her in awe, which she gave a sweet smile in return.

Before he could comment any more someone landed right in front of them. Captain Marvel smiled and nodded at Y/N, as she returned the gesture, and looked at Peter, who was still holding tightly onto the infinity stones. Peter looked at her with wide eyes and in awe.

“Hi I-I’m Peter.. Parker,” he said shyly. Captain Marvel smiled at him, looking between the two teenagers.

“I know,” she said as she gave Y/N a knowing glance. “Hey, Peter Parker. You got something for me?” Peter looked at the gauntlet before looking out at the army that was racing towards them, feeling scared at the moment.

“I don’t know how you’re gonna get through that,” he said as he delicately handed the glove to Carol as the other female Avengers and superheroes gathered together around her. Y/N felt immediately at home and looked over at Peter reassuringly as Wanda landed by her side.

“Don’t worry,” Y/N said with a smile as her mask got on and Okoye, T’Challa’s head of king’s guard, finished her sentence for her.

“She’s got help,” she said, and the group of them began to run like hell towards the growing army, all doing their own thing to slam through and take down the enemy. Y/N webbed them down as they tried to attack her sisters and knocked them over as she swung by. She saw one of the bigger monsters making its way towards her, and effortlessly picked it up and threw it into the rest of the aliens making their way towards her at a fast rate.

As she continued to fight off the enemy, she felt a strong surge of energy pass through her, making her stumble slightly. As she regained her balance, she watched as the aliens that were once running straight for her turned into dust, disappearing into the wind. She squinted her eyebrows, looking around for who had snapped before she felt the hairs on the back of her neck stand up, warning her that something was wrong.

She followed her senses to find Tony sitting against a piece of debris, extremely pale and barely moving, his arm and part of his face burnt off. She felt her breathing stop as she stumbled towards him, muttering his name as she collapsed in front of him in front of all the other Avengers.

“T-Tony? Tony! No!” She said as fell in front of him, going to grab his hand with both of hers. She hadn’t felt this type of heartbreak since 2018 when she had lost Peter, her mom, and the rest of her friends. But this time she was losing her father.

“Hey, kid,” he said so quietly she wouldn’t have heard him, but she was practically hugging him by now, clinging onto him as a silent way of asking not to leave her. As she heard his voice, an ugly sob ripped through her as she buried her head in his chest as a form of comfort.

“Tony, please not you too,” she asked quietly, squeezing his hand so tight that the metal surrounding it had started to cut into her palms, but she could care less. “Not you too, please. We need you, Tony. I need you, and Morgan, please.” She couldn’t even finish before breaking down.

“Mr. Stark? Can you hear me? It’s Peter.” Peter asked from behind her, shocked to see Y/N holding onto him and crying into him. Tony weakly looked up and brought his attention to the original web-slinging spider. “We won, Mr. Stark. You did it. You did it, sir.”

At the mention of his name, Y/N finally looked up towards Peter, and he felt his heart shatter looking at her already bloodshot red eyes and the tear tracks that were a bright contrast against the rest of her face, which was covered in dust and blood. He walked over to her and wrapped his arms around her, gently pulling her off and into his own arms.

“No, No! Let go, please! I need to help him. Please. No.” Her voice got quieter as Peter held her closely, her back pressed against his chest as they both watched him. Tony looked between the pair, and although it hurt him to see the tears in their eyes, he was happy that they would be able to work through it together. He looked up at Peter and nodded his chin towards Y/N.

“Take… take care of… of her,” he whispered, causing a sob to come over Peter as well as he nodded vigorously, holding her tighter against him if that was even possible at this point.

“Of course, yes always,” he said as he felt salty tears run down at a rapid pace. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry, Tony.” Tony tried to give him a smile, tried to give him a sign that everything would be okay, but found that he couldn’t.

Then Tony looked at Y/N. He remembered the last time she was like this, and it hurt him that he had to cause her the same pain. But he cared for her and knew that this was what had to happen to keep both of his daughters safe. “I love you.”

Y/N’s head fell as she heard the three simple words come from his mouth, leaning into Peter as she tries to control herself, trying to look strong in front of him, knowing who worried he must be already. “I love you, too, dad.” She whispered and nodded, reaching out to squeeze his hand one more time before Pepper came to his side. Peter carefully pulled Y/N back, her collapsing into his lap and crying into his shoulder as he rubbed her back tried to keep in his own tears to be strong for her but ended up letting go and crying into her soft hair.

“Friday?” Pepper asked, her hand on Tony’s chest as Tony’s hand was placed gently on top of hers.

“Life functions critical,” the AI responded. Y/N felt like she was gonna be sick. She couldn’t think she could breathe, how do you even breathe again? Because she couldn’t quite remember at the moment. She listened to Peter’s heartbeat and used his rising and falling chest as a model.

“Tony? Look at me,” Pepper managed a smile at Tony as he groaned while turning to look towards her. “You’re gonna be okay, you can rest now,” she said as she put a hand on his cheek, gently caressing it before placing a soft kiss to it. And after that, the light on his chest went dim, and it took everything in Y/N not to scream like the day she found out Peter wasn’t coming home for dinner that night.

She felt Peter shaking around her, choking on sobs. She knew he would try and act as a support base for her, and he always liked to put others before himself. But she just held onto him, her hands going up to his messy hair and carting her fingers through the strands as a silent way to tell him that she was there for him too.

The Avengers and other heroes and warriors who had teamed up together to fight kneeled down, showing their respect to another beautiful life taken. The chaos in the warzone had gone quiet, a moment of silence taken in honour of Tony Stark.

And just like that, he was gone, just another figure of history in the textbooks. But to others he was a friend, he was a teammate, he was an idol, he was family. And God knows that he wouldn’t be forgotten for what he was, a hero.

~~~

The funeral occurred a couple of weeks later, only close friends and family were invited at the small gathering at the lake house where he lived with his family. It was odd, walking into the house and feeling so much dread in a place she considered a getaway just days before, a place that brought her such a feeling of happiness and relief.

She sat quietly in a soft chair in the corner, trying to process everything that was happening and everything that would come with it afterwards. She had just finished watching Tony’s video to his family, which Pepper insisted included her, and felt heartbroken at the thought that it would truly be the last time she saw him, ever again.

“Hey,” his soft voice said as Peter crouched down next to her, a hand on her knee as he gently squeezed. His eyes were red and puffy, just as hers were, and he wore a black and white suit that looked nice on him, though it seemed an inappropriate time to comment on it. “They’re starting the service soon, um, by the lake. I think we should go.” Y/N nodded, standing up from her chair and taking his hand in her own, finding comfort in his warm and soft grip.

The two walked out to the deck, one that she had so many memories on with the rest of the Stark family. Peter brought her to stand beside him and his aunt May, who smiled at Y/N and squeezed her hand. Y/N smiled back, but it came out as more of a grimace. They stood just behind Happy, Pepper and Morgan, as Pepper leaned down and set the wreath onto the lake, in the middle it had Tony’s original arc reactor from 2008, with words engraved into it.

‘Proof Tony Stark has a heart’

She found humour in the words but also wondered why anyone had ever thought otherwise. Sure he was a bit egotistical and petty sometimes, and often took to bragging when it came to being one of the smartest people on earth. But if you had known him like I had, she thought to herself, you’d know that he was one of the most caring people ever.

She watched as it floated away down through the calm river, eventually turning into a speck in the distant, covered by trees and the glistening light reflected off the water. Y/N gulped harshly as she tried to keep her tears in, not trying to break the strong personality she had set in stone for the past five years, but nonetheless couldn’t help a few of them slip from her eyes.

When the funeral had ended Y/N went to greet the others that had attended, wearing her best fake smile as people commented on how sorry they were for her loss and she did the same for them. She had gotten many embraces from people she did and didn’t know, and shared small laughs and memories with them.

After Y/N got tired of talking to everyone she tapped Peter, who had stayed by her side through the whole day, and told him she was going to get a drink of water. Peter had insisted on coming and held her hand as they walked away from the crowd and to the cute lakeside cottage, Y/N had considered home for so many years. On the small bench beside the door sat Happy with little Morgan in his lap, who sprung off and ran towards the girl with a bright smile on her face.

“Y/N! Y/N!” Morgan chanted happily as she ran closer, arms stretched out. Y/N smiled genuinely at the young girl and crouched down, picked her up as she ran into her chest and resting her on her hip. She brushed her nose against her soft cheek and placed a kiss upon it.

“Hi, baby,” Y/N said as she bounced Morgan. Peter looked at Morgan with a grin as well, since it was honestly astounding how similar she was to her father. Morgan giggled and played with Y/N’s hair as they had a small conversation and Peter could only watch on in awe. Then Y/N turned Morgan to face Peter. “You remember who this is, don’t you? It’s uncle Peter!” Y/N said, looking at Morgan and then smiling up at Peter, who felt like he was about to cry again just hearing those words.

“Spidey! Spidey!” Morgan screeched happily as she leaned over and made grabbing hands towards Peter, asking him to pick her up. Peter smiled widely before taking her from Y/N’s grip and holding her on his own hip now.

“Hey there, nice to finally meet you,” he said as he rocked slightly and Morgan placed her head on his shoulder, wrapping her small arms around his neck. Peter felt like he might explode from cuteness overload.

“Yeah. Daddy and Y/N says that-that you is the bestest,” she says as she played with the collar of Peter’s shirt. “You’re my favourite superhero! But after daddy.” She says as she smiled up at him. Peter raises his eyebrows and nods, letting out a laugh as he continued to talk with her. Soon the girl was falling asleep on Peter’s shoulder and the two walked inside to put her down for a nap.

Peter gently placed her down on her bed as he put a few stuffed animals by her side and covered her with the pink, fluffy blanket at the end of the bed. He kissed her forehead as Y/N went to place another on her cheek.

“Love you 3000,” she mumbled in her half-asleep state, and Y/N smiled, feeling tears brimming in her eyes as she replied.

“Love you infinity,” she says as she kissed her head. Morgan smiled in her sleepy state as the two stood up and exited the room, closing the door as quietly as they could to not stir her. Peter pulled Y/N into a hug, rocking them from side to side as he felt her tears start to make his shirt wet, but he didn’t seem to care. He kissed her temple and gently grabbed her chin, guiding her to look up at him as he smiled down at her.

“You know, I love you infinity,” he mumbled as he leaned down to brush against her lips. She laughed, his presence making her feel so much better since he really was her saviour. She shook her head, scoffing.

“You’re such a dork, Parker,” she said as she looked up at him, smiling for what felt like the first time in forever. She didn’t know how he had that effect on her, but then again she wasn’t complaining. God knows she needs a bit of relief. “I love you infinity too,” she replied after leaving him hanging for a while, and she stood up on her toes to press her lips to his, the kiss soft and short but still full of emotion.

As they broke apart, he pressed another kiss on her forehead and pulled her into his embrace. “You know what would make you feel better?” He said into her ear, which she replied with a ‘hm?’, asking for him to continue. “If we went home and binge-watched that Shane Dawson conspiracy theory video you told me about the other day.” Y/N scrunched up her eyebrows and looked up at him, a soft laugh passing her lips.

“Right now? Are you serious?” she said, shaking her head as she jokingly pushed his chest. He also chuckled a bit.

“What?” He asked, taking her hand and backing down the hallway. “C’mon, Y/N, you know how long I’ve waited for this video! You can’t just tease me with it!” Y/N raised her eyebrow as she watched Peter bounce a bit, begging her with his adorable brown puppy eyes to come with him.

“Well, you know what? There’s actually two, and they’re an hour and a half each” she whispered, causing Peter to groan and throw his head back. As he looked back up he was smirking, his tongue swiping over his teeth as he looked at her.

“You’re gonna be the death of me,” he whispered as he tugged on her hand and pulled her away, Y/N following a giggling mess as he brought her to Aunt May’s car and drove them back home, both excitedly discussing different videos and movies and other events that Peter had missed while he was gone.

Even though it meant sacrificing a lot, and even though she was still devastated about Tony and Nat’s death, Y/N felt as if everything would be okay as she lied on Peter’s chest, his strong arms wrapped securely around her as they watched the movie long conspiracy videos together. They exchanged small kisses and soft words, and even feeding popcorn to each other cause they were that grossly sweet kind of couple. And Y/N had finally found her hope.

~~~

TAGS:

Permanent: @phonegalhelp @caswinchester2000

Peter Parker: @britishspidey @deansdeliciouspies @triviaisbop

Hope: @dee-writes-fics @xsweetnsour @underooling @studyxuxi@ibookishqueen @sunflowercth @bucky-to-my-barnes @green-lxght@softrdj @multifacetedfandom @obsessedwithrogertaylor @shayke-and-bake @bellero @spookyanairwin @lizlil @eridanuswave@reinyrei @wishing-wanting @dragqueenseverywhere @creativedogs @officialmarvelwhore @bolivianchickennugget @jarvis-play-despacito @pvachyy @ksmy-99 @venomavacado @triviaisbop @kidensdouble88 @stark-spiderling @autobotgirl15-blog @madampomfrcy

Let me know if you want to be added to the permanent or the peter parker taglist! Also, message me your thoughts on this chapter and if you’d like to maybe see a short epilogue for what comes after!

#peter parker #peter parker x reader #peter parker x superhero!reader #tony stark #tony stark x daughter!reader #avengers x reader #endgame #infinity war #spiderman far from home #spoilers #morgan stark x sister!reader #spiderman x spidergirl #imagine #mini series #hope

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beautyinthemoonlight1124 · 6 years ago

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Do you think Ali and Ash will make the Olympic roster? ANd do you think the CONCACAF tournament is structured in a way that will make it hard for us to qualify? I’m a new USWNT fan, I became a fan before the WWC because I found woso fanfics (yours included) so I don’t know a lot about soccer but I’ve somehow become I diehard USWNT and NWSL follower

Hi there. Welcome to woso! That’s women’s soccer, just in case you don’t know that yet. lol. First of all, thank you for reading the story. I appreciate it very much. :)

Now to your soccer questions… I’ll take the easier of the two first. I think the CONCACAF tournament is as good as it’s gonna get anytime soon. CONCACAF is probably just as corrupt as the rest of the FIFA, etc. But, in general, I think it’s a fair tournament and the USWNT should have no problem qualifying for the Olympics. But you never know. I think it was before 2012 Olympics (or maybe 2011 World Cup??) when the USWNT lost to Mexico and almost didn’t qualify! So you just never know. But there’s absolutely no reason the team shouldn’t win the CONCACAF tournament. They’ll certainly at least come in 2nd place and still qualify.

Whether or not Ali and Ashlyn make the Olympic roster is a much more difficult question. I believe with all my heart that the team is better with them both on it. They’re excellent players who could both still start (in my opinion anyway), and even more importantly, they’re experienced veterans who know what it’s like to play and win on the biggest stages. They were also both part of the 2016 Olympic team (Ashlyn was one of the alternates and Ali made her first Olympic squad ever - she missed the 2012 squad because of her knee injury) and I think it’s important to bring many of those players back so they will give it everything they’ve got to erase the embarrassment of their worst finish ever in Rio. I’m hoping Ashlyn will get an official spot this time around because I believe she deserves it. I personally think she’s a better keeper than Alyssa but I know most people disagree. I watched Alyssa when she was with the Boston Breakers and she’s a great keeper, but she’s not nearly vocal or bossy enough back there. She never has been and I don’t think she ever will be. It’s just not in her DNA. Her timidity back there is why a lot of the miscommunications happen along the backline. It’s Alyssa’s job to tell them all exactly what to do. Anyway, I digress. Ashlyn should make the team as the 2nd keeper because she’s the only one with any true leadership skills. You’ll notice that most of the time Jill Ellis tried some crazy grouping of newbies on the backline over the past 2-3 years she had Ashlyn in goal. Alyssa almost always gets the best and most experienced defenders on her backlines. This is certainly not always the case, but it does happen more often than not. So I think Ashlyn should make the Olympic roster. It’ll be her first time and I’ll be super stoked for her.

I also think Ali should make the squad. She’s certainly good enough to play on that backline. She more than proved that at the World Cup. All the horseshit US Soccer and Jill Ellis tried to feed everybody about how old and slow Kriegs was over the past 2-½ years was exposed as exactly that - horseshit. I think Ali is a better outside back than Sonnett and Davidson (and Purce for that matter too). I think Crystal Dunn did a fabulous job at LB at the WC and I think Casey Short would be a great backup for her. I think Kelley O’Hara is the starter at RB and nobody is going to change that. US Soccer markets her like crazy and I just don’t see anybody taking that spot from her. I still think Ali is a better defender than KO, all day every day. But I agree that KO is a better offensive player than Ali is. It depends on what the coach is looking for. It’s just that simple. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, Ali was the first and only defender off the bench in the biggest games in the World Cup. That says it all right there really. Why would you not bring her to the Olympics with you too? Also, on a side note, I think Kelley’s too aggressive and reckless to be a starting defender. I feel the same way about Sonnett too. You shouldn’t have to worry about your defenders getting yellow cards. You want your defenders to be solid back there and tough, no doubt, but you have to be able to rely on them for the full 90. And if a player has to change the way they’re playing the game to avoid getting a second yellow card and leaving the team down to 10 players, then that’s a problem. That’s just my take on defense in general. Ali plays tough, physical, aggressive defense - that’s what attracted me to her in the very first place back in 2011 at that World Cup. But she rarely commits a foul and hardly ever gets a card. That’s how I like my defenders. But that’s just me. Another good thing for Ali is that she can play Center Back too. She’s played CB quite often for the Pride in the NWSL over the past couple of years and she does a really good job of it. A lot of people assume it’s because she was too slow and old to play RB anymore. But that’s simply not the case. Tom Sermanni moved her to CB because she was easily the best defender on the team and he wanted her in a more centralized position so she could help more on defense and so she could lead and command more from that centralized position. She’s also really fast and he wanted her to play there in CB because the other CBs on the team were kind of slow. Zadorsky isn’t slow though, but she wasn’t there when Sermanni made the move. We all know how dynamic Ali can be from that RB position and she still sends in some of the best crosses in the game, NWSL or USWNT. If the Pride ever get a decent backline again, Ali might move back to RB where she truly excels.

The point is, she can play multiple roles along the backline and that’s a big asset for her when it comes to making the Olympic roster. Instead of taking 23 players (20 field players and 3 keepers) like we do for the World Cup, we only get to take 18 players to the Olympics. 16 field players and 2 keepers. Nobody knows what Vlatko’s going to do because he’s too new to get a feel for yet, but making the Olympic roster is one of the hardest things to do for the USWNT players. Theoretically, you could take the WC roster and eliminate 1 keeper and 4 field players and you’d be all set. But that alone is a difficult task. Add to that the players who just missed the cut for the WC, like Casey Short, and the decision gets even harder to make. Players like Julie Ertz and Crystal Dunn and Ali Krieger who can play multiple positions become very valuable now.

And for God’s sake, everybody has to be healthy!! Ellis screwed up big time in 2016 by bringing Megan Rapinoe who wasn’t ready to come back after her torn ACL. It was ridiculous. I love Pinoe - I truly do. But she wasn’t healthy and shouldn’t have taken up a roster spot. I hope Vlatko doesn’t do the same thing with Alex Morgan after she has her baby. I love Morgan too, more than most people do, and I think she makes the team better just by being on the field and keeping the defense honest so the other players have room to do their thing and score goals. I think Morgan is one of the most selfless strikers I’ve ever seen and she gets crap for it all the time. The stats don’t show it but she changes the game just by being out there and keeping defenders busy and opening up space and setting plays up. She’ll never get the credit she deserves for that either. Anyway, I love her ok? But if she’s not 100% then I don’t want her on the team. Period. End of story. I know Sydney Leroux just came back after giving birth and played in the NWSL 3 months afrer having her daughter, but ask Syd how she did after having her first baby? Syd was able to do that because she knew what her body needed after pregnancy beause she’d done it already before. Morgan is an amazing athlete and I’ll be thrilled for her if she can do it, but I also don’t want her to try so hard either. You just had your first baby. Relax and enjoy it. You’ve already got an Olympic gold medal, you know? Here’s another advantage for Ali Krieger - Kelley O’Hara is injury-prone and can’t stay healthy these days. That’s a big risk to take with you into the Olympics. We’re gonna need a really good backup for her. Ali Krieger.

So this is a whole lot of words to say I don’t know if Ali or Ashlyn will make the Olympic roster. They both deserve to be there. I think the team will benefit greatly from having them both there. But we’re just gonna have to wait and see what Vlatko does.

Here’s what I think I’d like to see for my Olympic roster:

Strikers/Wingers: Rapinoe, Heath, Press, Lloyd, Pugh

MF: Lavelle, Ertz, Horan, Mewis, Brian

D: Dunn, Sauerbrunn, Dahlkemper, O’Hara, Krieger, Short

GK: Naeher, Harris

cut from WC roster: Franch, Sonnett, Davidson, Long, MacDonald, Morgan (I know this is 6 players, but I put Casey Short into the roster instead of Sonnett)

Morgan Brian has been playing really well lately so I think I’d take her instead of Allie Long right now. I personally don’t like Pugh very much - I don’t think she’s improved at all since she started playing with the team in 2105/2016. I honestly would take MacDonald over Pugh but that’ll never happen in a million years. And I really like Tierna Davidson a lot. I like her much better at CB and I would seriously consider taking her over Dahlkemper because I’m not a huge Dahlkemper fan to begin wtih. But, again, that’ll never happen. Although who knows? Jill Ellis got rid of Ali Krieger for less reason so who the hell knows? I like bringing 6 defenders because Crystal Dunn could slide up into MF or Forward if necessary during the Olympics. She’s the ultimate utility player who can kick ass on any line on the pitch. Legitimately. And I don’t like when they move JJ back to CB because she’s so good at that holding midfield spot. The team plays totally differently when she’s not in midfield (they play worse). So take 6 defenders. Keep JJ at MF and move Crystal around if injuries happen and we need another body up top for some reason.

There. I’m done. I’ll stop now. Aren’t you sorry you asked? lol

#the sea captain's house

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icedanceupstarts · 6 years ago

Text

2020 Russian Nationals Preview

We’re in Nationals season now, and as the year closes, what better way to celebrate than with Russian Nationals? It’s got everything-- scoring shenanigans, soul-crushing dread, more scoring shenanigans, last minute injuries, just straight up nepotism, the realization that we’re not getting a single Popova/Mozgov gala this season, and the looming possibility that everyone might end up getting banned and this might be the last chance for your faves to make a championship event. Merry Christmas!

Sofia Evdokimova / Egor Bazin

Age: 22/24

Started Skating Together: 2007

Coach: Oleg Sudakov, Valentin Kuziaev, Artem Kudashev

Season's Best: 169.27

Rhythm Dance: 42nd Street

Free Dance: Well These Costumes Weren’t Nominated for Anything

Last year’s bronze medalists and masters of being available to take advantage of an opportunity if it arose have been having a bit of a struggle season thus far, but it certainly didn't stop them last season. They always seem to pop up just when everyone else has written them off, and with their longevity as a team and reputation for giving reliable and consistent performances, they are always capable of moving up the ranks and taking higher placements than people may have expected. Fourth year seniors, this was their first season to get two Grand Prix assignments and to not have to rely on a host pick for either. And now as one of the four teams in this field with Europeans experience, their reliability cannot be downplayed. That said, even as we say not to underestimate them, this isn't the best material they've ever had. They're up against another 42nd Street in the rhythm dance, and while their Schindler's List free dance is hardly one of the more clumsy attempts we've seen even just this season, it can sometimes come close to seeming a little bland. While that's obviously leagues better than causing an international incident, it's not the best for getting the judges to sit up and take notice in such a deep field. And they do have some great qualities-- their cantilever lifts are some of the best in the business, they have a nice flow and an incredibly natural way of relating to each other after so long. Forever the example of the merits of sticking it out despite the odds, they’ve had plenty of time to fix their levels and add a little extra wow factor to their programs, so there’s every reason to keep your eye on these eternal dark horses.

Ksenia Konkina / Pavel Drozd

Age: 18/24

Started Skating Together: 2018

Coach: Alexander Zhulin

Season's Best: 178.43

Rhythm Dance: 2nd 42nd Street

Free Dance: A Nice Start

This will be the first nationals of the first full season of two skaters we've been following separately for years. This will be Ksenia’s first senior nationals ever, though both had plenty of junior success before partnering up at the end of last year. Pavel is a former junior national champion and two time junior world medalist with his previous partner, and Ksenia is a multiple time JGP medalist with her previous partners. Picking up almost right where you left off with a previous partner while staying in juniors as Ksenia did several times is impressive enough, but jumping into seniors in a brand new partnership and already being an internationally competitive team is quite the accomplishment, even with Pavel’s season of senior experience. Right off the bat they had a technical prowess and matching that other teams try for years to achieve, with nice deep edges and long beautiful lines. They're still building their identity but they're a solid team without any notable flaws and their Challenger series results are not surprising, even with their limited competitive experience together. We've seen some express confusion about their quick rise (which is truly fucking incredible considering the next entry in this preview), but there's no extra political push here, just genuine, basic quality and a smoothly progressing partnership. We wish them the very best at their first joint nationals. It's hard to know exactly how they'll stack up as they’ve never faced most of these teams as a pair, but as long as the judges acknowledge quality they should be in the mix.

Annabelle Morozov / Andrei Bagin

Age: 18/23

Started Skating Together: 2017

Coach: Nikolai Morozov

Season's Best: 191.71

Rhythm Dance: It's Too Darn HIGH

Free Dance: Gazing Into The Abyss

In their third season together, Morozov/Bagin have grown into each other as a team and will be looking to...

You know what? We give up. We're done. Anyone who has read our blog at all should know our general philosophy at this point, but one must draw the line somewhere. We tried, okay?

Normally we try to keep things positive and upbeat here at icedanceupstarts, but this team has had us on the verge of a mental breakdown all season, and this competition might be what hurls us over that cliff. Morozov/Bagin have the third highest season's best coming into this event, and it’s their rhythm dance score of all things truly pulling their score up, which is certainly a development. Not only is their SB third highest in this event, it is forty points higher than their SB last season (Golden Spin 2018 versus Golden Spin 2019). There’s year to year improvement in a new team and then there’s… that. Sure the Fed didn’t get them a Grand Prix assignment this season but frankly who needs it when you can score like that?? Scores might generally be a mystery, but we can't find any way to justify the numbers that keep popping up when they compete. It's not that they have no qualities whatsoever, it's that it's genuinely insulting to pretend that they're anywhere near the level of the other teams in this preview. They’ve undoubtedly improved their consistency this season but it’s still very much a case of when you’ve got all these unique, interesting, and massively talented teams, how and why is this the one with the huge scores. We feel like we've been screaming into the void for weeks now. People have been watching the competitions they've been at and commenting on the scoring but somehow NOT mentioning the glaring elephant in the room? This is the part where we generally list their good points, and we try to be generous, but in the wake of the judges own generosity we reserve the right for stinginess. Something something in their third Nationals together we'll see if Morozov/Bagin can use their combined powers of increased competitive experience, nepotism, and being tall to breakthrough into the top 5, and possibly onto the world team while your mods have to go get drunk. To live is to suffer.

Sofia Shevchenko / Igor Eremenko

Age: 18/22

Started Skating Together: 2014

Coach: Alexander Svinin and Irina Zhuk

Season's Best: 178.08

Rhythm Dance: Burlesque But Why

Free Dance: No Strings Attached

The reigning junior National champions may be moving into the deepest senior Russian ice dance field we’ve seen recently, but based on how they were skating by the end of their debut senior Grand Prix series they are more than ready to jump in and contend for some of the higher placements. While their step sequence levels can sometimes be a wee bit yikes, their elements are usually performed with ease and they have really creative lifts. The fact that we enjoy their rhythm dance at all is proof of their incredible charisma and performance quality. It's a program that rides on the strength of the skaters, and they're just such special performers. Their free dance is in the quirky, modern style they've developed, and also apparently about marionettes? Because sure why not. It’s worth noting when even the most experienced senior teams can show full ownership of their programs, but it’s a skill these two have been showcasing for several seasons already with their unique style that may not give a storyline you can follow but you’re also very sure that they know exactly what they are trying to portray. It never feels gimmicky or tryhard, these two just know exactly what they want. They’re such a treat to watch even when watching their TES box is vaguely alarming. They’ve shown a decent amount of consistency as well, delivering calm, strong performances even at this higher level and beating some surprisingly strong and established teams. It’s hard to tell where they’ll fall here as the transition from juniors to seniors in ice dance is typically a many season process, but if they can bring the levels with their performance, they’ve got a great shot at a good placement.

Anastasia Shpilevaya / Grigory Smirnov

Age: 20/22

Started Skating Together: 2012

Coach: Alexander Svinin and Irina Zhuk

Season's Best: 172.93

Rhythm Dance: Hopelessly Devoted to L1ving It Up

Free Dance: Magical Mystery Ride

These two finally made their senior GP debut after missing out on assignments last season and largely were able to make the most of it. The lightness of the Finnstep suits them well, though we’d prefer to see fewer L1s, and they’ve got a real talent at pulling the audience into their performances whatever characters they are portraying. Both of their programs have gone through a lot of changes and improvements since test skates, but the free dance in particular got its moment to shine on the GP with reworked choreo steps that will not be invalidated like they were at Finlandia and a new split rotational lift. It’s not their most describable program but when they skate it with such joy and commitment it’s hard not to enjoy it yourself. These two could practically be the definition of fan favorites, they’ve just not had the consistent showings at competitions more than five people watch. Want an expressive team? There’s no one their ages with the same charisma on the ice or ability to build off each other to present even more to judges and audience. Want a team with good lines? Anastasia has some of the best extension and toe point out there, and even as a team with a rather large height difference you’d be hard pressed to find times their free legs don’t match. Cool lifts? Well that’s where their height difference and Anastasia’s flexibility come into play in a big way. Versatility? They have never repeated themselves and always make the effort to try something new with their program selections. Of course they’re a young team still working their way back after missing most of the 2017/2018 season and with plenty they need to improve - more senior presentation, better ice coverage, deeper edges, find some key points. Their season’s best tells that story, but they are a team worth watching whatever happens at this event. There’s also still the case of their missing PCS from Universiade earlier this year, which was also held in Krasnoyarsk, so hopefully that’s just been hanging out in a bar or something and makes its way to the arena in time for the competition. We’re always rooting for these two to get a bigger platform to showcase their talent, and maybe this will be their year.

Victoria Sinitsina / Nikita Katsalapov

Age: 24/28

Started Skating Together: 2014

Coach: Alexander Zhulin

Season's Best: 212.15

Rhythm Dance: Singin’ in the Sloppy Twizzles

Free Dance: Generic Loveliness

Sinitsina/Katsalapov have had an interesting career, to put it lightly. The Great Russian Partnerswap Drama of 2014, when the expected to be golden team was initially anything but, followed by more ups and downs than a rollercoaster, eventually leading to their current status as reigning world silver medalists and National champions, but recently placing last at GPF. They have remarkable skating skills and speed, and have improved their consistency recently, but they still tend to be a touch wild, a trait to their skating that might be better suited to a different style than the subtle elegance they’ve been going for with their recent free dance selections but also one that can majorly trip them up on big elements if they don’t keep it in check. Their rise to greatness last season was certainly not unprecedented. They’ve clearly always had the ability, it just took them some time to truly start skating together and it seemed every time they got close they were derailed by injury. They’re still a team who needs everything to align in order for them to contend with the best, no matter how many people have declared them the anointed challengers to Papadakis/Cizeron, and at the GPF the choreo slide was their nemesis, all but literally taking them down. A loss of balance on the slide was counted as a fall which lost them valuable GOE. Remember the whole massive GOE points for no-level choreo elements? Well this is an example of the opposite, or when small errors on choreo elements can have huge scoring consequences. A number of people have been writing them off due to their recent setback, but we think that would be a mistake. Presumably they're not about to make the same mistake twice, and while Nikita "What's A Twizzle" Katsalapov remains an ever looming threat to their scores, he mostly survives by the skin of his teeth these days. Their biggest issue is that the judges seem a little underwhelmed by their free dance. There are no problems with it, really, but to elevate it above the level of being a functioning product they need to at once clean up the little wobbly areas on some of the elements while also adding more abandon and passion to their interpretation. It does serve as a good showcase of their skating skills, but as their tango last year showed, they can both show off their skills and bring the drama and interest. The rhythm dance will be the important segment for them. It's been their money program, and they have the second highest scores of any team there, so they can't afford to have a subpar performance there like they did at GPF when the reception to their free dance has been a resounding shrug. If they can do their best in the rhythm dance and breathe a little more life into their free, it's going to be difficult for anyone to deny them a repeat of their title.

Anastasia Skoptcova / Kirill Aleshin

Age: 19/22

Started Skating Together: 2013

Coach: Svetlana Alexeeva, Elena Kustarova, Olga Riabinina

Season's Best: 169.24

Rhythm Dance: How Bout A Chance

Free Dance: Fifty Shades of Find that GOE

The 2018 Junior World Champions are having a wee bit of a struggle season. For the second season in a row they had injuries that forced them to miss pre GP events and impacted their assignments, which is suboptimal, and especially so in such a deep field. They're such a talented team but unfortunately this is a team full of talents, including a growing number of young teams with junior success, meaning even the smallest setbacks can add up quickly. Their technical ability can’t be denied but they’re going to need to bring their best to this competition which they have not been able to show yet this season. We genuinely do hope that the people who worked so hard on the Bonnie and Clyde musical only for it to close after less than two weeks know that at long last they have found true appreciation in figure skating. Reviewers might have called the musical "trite", "insipid", and "middle of the road", but apparently ice dancers can't get enough of it this year. We'd crack a joke about that saying something about ice dancer's taste, but we have generally enjoyed this season's RDs and most of the Bonnie and Clydes, so perhaps it is we who are insipid and trite? Anyway, this one isn't our favorite of the Bonnie and Clydes-- the slowed down This World Will Remember Us for the Finnstep is less than ideal-- but it's a solid program nonetheless. Their free dance feels like it builds off of last years while still being fresh and new for them. It's been very interesting seeing the different directions the younger teams have been going to try to establish themselves. For such a tall, leggy team with minimal height difference, they have some pretty acrobatic lifts. They manage to make their physical reality seem like a plus rather than a negative. Their step sequences are so smooth and a great display of their long, matching lines and elegance. They’ve had some struggles this season, with mistakes big and small keeping their scores down, but if they can avoid things like falling on their choreo elements they could repeat their top 5 placement from last year, or maybe even higher.

Alexandra Stepanova / Ivan Bukin

Age: 24/26

Started Skating Together: 2006

Coach: Alexander Svinin and Irina Zhuk

Season's Best: 208.81

Rhythm Dance: A Kiss May Be Grand But It Won't Get You Levels

Free Dance: Somehow This Music Mashup Works?

They may be two-time GPF pewter medalists, but this year Stepanova/Bukin are coming into nationals as the higher placing Russian team of the two who competed at the final, and so could have the momentum coming into this event. Fan favorites with great performance quality and a strong knowledge of what their strengths are as a team, this could be their big chance to win. The first half of their rhythm dance is so far the strongest part. For all that their kiss at the end has generated the most conversation, we think the much more pressing issues are the transition that feels too much like an ending and the fact that so far Your Song just lacks the dynamism of the first half. Also two out of three performances have featured them fighting their costumes in order to perform but perhaps they’ve finally cracked the code? For us, their free dance is the stronger program this year. We may have been filled with Fear when we first heard the concept, but it's very well put together and we like it a lot. They're continuing their modern and kind of sexy approach contrasting with Sinitsina/Katsalapov's more classic and stately approach. They even won that portion of the event at Skate America, even if they had slightly more struggles at GPF. The way things have shaken out so far, they’ll need to at least keep things close in the rhythm dance so they have a chance of overtaking Sinitsina/Katsalapov with their more dramatic and crowdpleasing free dance, but this is bound to be a very competitive battle for the top of both teams can put out their best.

Tiffani Zagorski / Jonathan Guerreiro

Age: 25/28

Started Skating Together: 2014

Coach: Svetlana Alexeeva, Elena Kustarova, Olga Ryabinina

Season's Best: 184.44

Rhythm Dance: The Greatest Circus Moths

Free Dance: Surviving

Several teams back in competition this season and several others seeing major score increases meant no Grand Prix medals or GPF for Zagorski/Guerreiro this season, but they still managed a relatively solid GP showing, taking fifth at both of their events despite not competing at any other international events so far this year. Skating can always be just as mental as it is physical but that will especially be the case for these two at this event and putting last year’s disaster as far away as possible. They wrapped up their GP series fairly early, skating in the first and third events, so it will be interesting to see how far their programs have come in that time. Their rhythm dance was a late offseason change and while the music cuts and distinctive yet nonsensical dress(darn copyright infringement but it’s nuts) may not make this the best Greatest Showman program for us, it’s got potential if they can skate it up to the level they are more than capable of. Their free dance choice is possibly a little on the nose but it’s very distinctive and has a ton of potential. Outside of the top two, no one in this field comes close to the competitive experience Zagorski/Guerreiro have - GPF, Europeans, Worlds, Olympics. They weren’t given any leeway with championship assignments following last year’s nationals, but their experience really does set them apart from the rest. The way they hold themselves and perform, their maturity, it all stems from that experience and is clear to see. We hope Zagorski/Guerreiro have tied their bootlaces a little tighter this year, or maybe even make use of a roll or two of skate tape, and show their very best. They have every chance of getting back to the championship level, and we wish them luck.

#ice dance #preview #2020 russian nationals #team russia

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nyxi-styx · 6 years ago

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On Character Development

Let me preface this by saying that I started watching Supernatural somewhat casually in 2012, but binging in 2014. (The first episode I ever saw was actually a rerun of ‘A Very Supernatural Christmas’ back in 2008/09-ish.) I diligently watched EVERY episode, catching up online or on the app when I didn’t have cable. I stopped watching season 12 a few episodes in because I hated it. I watched some of the beginning of season 13 and it was “okay”, watched Scoobynatural because I’ve loved Scooby-Doo for as long as I can remember (my bedroom in 2nd grade when I was living with my grandma was entirely scooby-doo themed), and watched Gabriel’s episodes because... he’s my fave. I got tired of the repetitive storylines and recycled lore. I got tired of their mistreatment of characters. I am still tired of these things. And I’m tired of the constant fandom drama. I tried to leave, to get out, to stop caring. But I still care about the characters, the cast, my ships... Destiel and writing content for it has been a big part of my freetime for the past 4-5 years. It’s hard to walk away from something that has made you feel so many things so intensely. I started out as a Dean girl (still am) and Samcurious (Still am). Then I was a Cas girl, a Crowley girl, fuck- even a Kevin girl, before ultimately settling on Gabriel. When information about the end of season 14 came out, I was surprised at the route they’d chosen to go, amused, and- as a Rob Benedict fan- kind of excited. I was (and still am) ready for the absolute SHIT SHOW I know season 15 is going to be. It’s either going to be bad in the way that bad horror movies exist and you watch them because they’re so terrible but they’re fun. Or it’s going to be bad and no one is going to have a good time. It’s going to be emotional in the time leading up to the airing of it all anyway. There’s going to come “Last day filming with [actor]” posts, “Last day in the Impala“ posts, “Last day in the bunker” posts, and saddest of all “Last day as Dean/Sam/Castiel” posts. It’s going to be painful. But I’m ready and willing. I can’t wait to see what they do next. Anyway...

I tried to watch JUST the season 14 finale. But I barely made it five minutes before I had to turn it off. Not because it was bad, but because the recap, “Carry On Wayward Son”, and J2′s acting abilities and the EMOTIONS they portray... dragged me right back in. I knew I had to catch up. Against my better judgement. “Fuck.”

So, once I finished catching up on “Slasher” (great Netflix series, highly recommend), I started catching up on anything I hadn’t seen of season 13 and rewatching Gabriel’s episodes. (Did I mention he’s my fave?) I’m now 10 episodes into season 14.

Now, the show isn’t without its faults still. Honestly, so many things could be solved if Sam and Dean would stop letting monsters monologue. Shoot first, ask questions later. But... then we lose all the drama, right? Still more things could be solved if Sam and Dean would talk to each other openly and honestly but hey. BMs, right? Bro moments? Broments?

First of all, no one will EVER be able to touch Mark Pellegrino’s performance as Lucifer. He makes me feel everything: From “Lucifer is annoying and I goddamn love him; he’s so funny.” to “Jesus fucking christ just KILL HIM WHILE YOU HAVE THE CHANCE!!! STAB LUCIFER! LET HIM DIE!!” and everything in between. He almost got me to sympathize with him. Yikes.

Secondly, the range of Misha fucking Collins and his multiple portrayals of different versions of Castiel (and Jimmy) will never stop blowing me away. He’s gone from Angel of the Lord and High Holy Tax Accountant and you WILL show him some damn respect!... to sassy as fuck (honestly I live for him sassing Lucifer while they were locked up in hell) and not willing to take shit from anyone except Sam and Dean. And that’s growth, man. He’s just... I don’t have the ability to put all of my thoughts and emotions into words, so please settle for a simple “UGHGHGHGHHHHHHHH” followed by a keysmash like so: aslkfla;sknfkasdjfnwqrjqejrfna Sam, Dean, and Cas are all REALLY GOOD DADS to JACK??????????? Like I expected it from Cas since it’s his duty because he promised Kelly and all, and I kinda expected it from Dean once he came around because he’d be the dad he wished he’d had, but I wasn’t quite expecting it from Sam??? But Sam is REALLY good??????

Sam has changed a lot too, overtime, and I don’t know how to describe it, exactly, but whatever it is... while I have always recognized Jared as a handsome man- sure, even hot or sexy at times- I never was SUPER into him... I’m more attracted to Sam now than I have ever been in the past and it’s something in his personality that has shifted that I can’t quite put my finger on. But attraction aside, it’s so GOOD to see these characters actually grow, change, and develop despite the fact that the show seems to have forgotten how to do that.

Now, at first, when I heard about Dean accepting warzone!Michael and being his vessel, I was angry. “Fuck that. That’s out of character. Dean would NEVER!” But... upon seeing it happen... okay, I get it. It was super in character. And it was awesome to see Jensen play something vastly different (and kinda hot) and do so very fucking well. The pain and fear on his face when he realizes what he has to do... Well fucking done Jensen!!! And the raw fear and pain on Castiel’s face as he waits alone... Well fucking done, Misha!!!

What I hadn’t noticed in my first watch-through of “Exodus” (I think)- and it’s probably because I was angry and turned it off- was that Dean said “Gabe sacrificed himself for us. We owe him everything.” First of all, I love the canonization of calling Gabriel “Gabe”. 12/10 Secondly, this is not the attitude I would ever have expected Dean to have about Gabriel. Not when you consider their history. And Jensen’s delivery of that really hurt. Additionally, when Gabriel is recounting his time hiding out in Monte Carlo to Sam and Dean, and Sam gets annoyed and cuts him off, Dean looks like he’s actually enjoying the story. He even turns to look at Sam with an expression I can only describe as “excuse you. the man lived my fantasy life and i’m living vicariously. rude.” The fact that Dean wasn’t always curt or hostile towards Gabriel is not at all what I expected and it’s honestly good to see that kind of growth. Dean and Gabriel aren’t really super different, after all. Furthermore, what I didn’t notice through BOTH times I watched Gabriel’s s13 episodes and what was featured in the recap preceding 14x01... Dean shouted “Gabe! No!” when Gabriel was killed by Michael. I didn’t notice this before and I legitimately had to pause the recap because it pained me. It genuinely brought me to tears. Again: GROWTH. Like... Dean actually cared about Gabriel. And that was something I never expected but oh my god.

I love finding things out about the characters we didn’t know before. So we all knew that Dean likes junk food, is a big nerd, loves Scooby-Doo, and loves classic rock music (and is a disaster bi) but I LOVED finding out that he loves horror movies and uses them as an escape. (Jesus, Dean and I are almost the same person except I’m pan). Gabriel’s entire backstory is another thing I loved finding out. Juicy tidbits are the best tidbits. But Gabriel’s character development is another whole post on its own.

Sam taking control and commanding forces out of the bunker is another personal favorite. As was Sam’s interactions with Lucifer and Rowena.

I don’t know. I’m starting to ramble because all of this is just bringing up more thoughts and I’m getting disorganized and derailed. It’s too long of a post as it is so I’ll just end it.

I’m just really glad to see the characters growing and developing in a show that’s just a dead cash cow that they won’t quit beating enough to take risks and make changes.

Oh god, the Wayward Sisters episode was its own hot pot of character development and a masterpiece, but again... another post of it’s own.

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hellowkatey · 6 years ago

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The Come Up (Bucky x Reader)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/18701557/chapters/44353861

Friends to lovers trope cause I’m a sucker for a slow burn. All further chapters will be posted to AO3 (link at bottom), but the first chapter is posted in its entirety below the break.

Summary: Newly accepted as an official Avenger, you move into the infamous compound, anxious to be a part of a team for the first time. You quickly find acceptance among the group, but your loner habits are taking a bit longer to acclimate. Your first mission comes around, and you finally meet the infamous Bucky Barnes, immediately clicking and falling into a natural friendship. When ~feelings~ arise, you must figure out how to figure out if these new emotions need to be suppressed or let out in the open.

Warnings: none

Tags: friend to lover, pre IW/EG, reader x bucky

Rating: PG13 for language and suggestive content

When you look in the mirror, you don’t see “hero”.

It doesn’t matter that the suit Tony designed for you makes you look the part. No amount of lightweight bulletproof super fabric and Avengers emblems will change that you are still you underneath— hardened, scarred, and internally broken.

“It looks great.” You whirl around to see Natasha leaning against the door frame of your bedroom. She looks ready for bed with her hair tucked into a loose bun, a pair of flannel pajama pants and a gray tank top.

“Thanks,” you say shyly, glancing back at yourself in the mirror. For as wrong as it feels, it fits like a damn glove. He asked if you had a preference on design. You just said to keep it simple, and he really nailed it.

It looks like normal clothing. The pants are black, high waisted and fitted down your legs like skinny jeans but soft and stretchy and thicker than they seem. He explained it’s because they are meant to block bullets. A new material they got from Wakanda. The top is a dark gray v-neck and a similar material. It’s long sleeve and has the Avengers emblem on the breast and on the back of the neck in black.

Your favorite part is the jacket. It looks like black denim, feels like denim, and moves like denim. According to Tony it’s better. Adjusts to the weather to be cooling or heating. Tough and durable against sharp objects and bullets. Above all, it is practically the same outfit you have worn when you have gone out to do some ass kicking. Tony even let you keep your favorite combat boots.

“I want you to feel like you can be yourself here.” He said when he gave you a box containing this suit. The way he looked at you meant he read your file. They all have the same look when they learn the truth.

“Did you ever feel guilty being here?” You ask, turning to look at Natasha as you slide the jacket off and pull out your own bedtime clothes. She smiles softly, longing in her eyes.

“I still do sometimes. It’s hard moving past the things I’ve done. There will always be red in my ledger no matter how many times I kick bad guys in the face.”

You chuckle at the thought of Nat literally smashing some perp in the jaw. You’re sure she isn’t exaggerating either. “What helped?”

“The people. I let them in, and now they’re my family. I just keep reminding myself that they know about my past and still love me.”

“Easy as that?”

“Easy at that. Have a good night, [y/n].”

You say goodnight and close your bedroom door with her departure. Now alone you change out of the fancy suit and into an oversized t-shirt that hits halfway down your thighs and shorts just in case you run into someone in the hallway at 2am or there’s an attack in the middle of the night. Precautions you never had to deal with working alone.

You set an alarm for 7am for your morning workout and fall asleep almost immediately, the weight of another exhausting day pulling you into darkness.

The chains of the punching bag clatter and twist as you land multiple hard hits on the side. Sweat is dripping off your body as you land a final fatal blow and the punching bag strap gives away, falling to the ground with a loud thud that echos through the training room. You shake out your hands and kick it to the side with two others you have demolished this morning.

“Looks like the punching bag destroyer isn’t me for once.” Steve Rogers laughs, walking into the room with two other men that you recognize as San Wilson and Bucky Barnes. Sam smiles widely at you and then looks at your small pile of fatalities with wide eyes.

“Super soldier?”

“Sam—“

“Oh are we not allowed to ask?” He rolls his eyes at Steve but then looks at you a little concerned he crossed a line. You give him a reassuring smile.

“Not exactly a super solider by design, but I have some similarities. Strength, agility, enhanced senses, and faster healing would be the overlap.” Steve nods at your list, confirming your assumption.

“Anything else? Laser vision maybe? Man, I have been so disappointed in the lack of laser vision in this--”

“Sam,” Steve groans, and you let out a genuine laugh. You’re internally giddy at how well this conversation is going, even if it’s just a little banter between the naturally outgoing Falcon and Steve Rogers. You glance at Bucky who is standing by quietly, per usual. You know he’s paying attention because his eyes are going back and forth between you and Sam, but his expression is neutral. The resting stoicism of Bucky Barnes.

“Oh come on,” Sam whines. Steve gives him another look and this time he seems like he will cease.

“We’re not here to barrade [y/n]. We are here to deliver a mission.”

He holds out a file folder. It’s thick, and stamped with the SHIELD logo. Must be a few years old.

“How’s your Portuguese?”

“Fairly decent.” You reply in Portuguese, opening the folder to find a stack of case files with a black and white photograph paper clipped to the first page.

“Perfect. While we hate to just throw you into the field so quick, you’re the only other fluent Portuguese in house at the moment.”

“Other?”

“You will be joining Bucky in Brazil on this mission.”

You look up from the case to look at Bucky. Your eyes meet and the corner of his mouth turns up the smallest amount. A friendly smile. You guess it’s better than nothing.

Excitement courses through you. Your first mission! You didn’t expect to be so excited for something you’ve been doing for years, yet you can’t help but feel a little more confident after your talk with Natasha. You’re working towards a better future.

“When do we leave?”

“Saturday.” Steve says, indicating you have about two days to prepare. “Better start reading.”

The three men then turn and leave you with a stack of classified files and three broken punching bags.

November 18, 2004

Agent Log Transcript

“Shield agent Riley Gonzalez reporting in. It is November 18 in São Paulo, Brazil. Investigation of the numerous mystery attacks in the area has come up with no concrete evidence... locals have little insight, or do not seem affected by the disturbances. I have seen nothing down here that would indicate possible extraterrestrial activity. Next check in is November 24th unless new information is uncovered.”

Transcript End.

November 20th, 2004

Agent Log Transcript

“Shield Agent Riley Gonzalez, reporting in. Uhhh, so, I don’t know what to say. I, uh, I found something weird, don’t know if it connects, but--”

[yelling in background, incoherent voices]

“Shit!”

Transcript End.

You’re sitting in one of the large armchairs in the study, curled up in a blanket and sifting through the case files. You leave in the morning, and you just want to go over them once more to make sure you didn’t miss anything.

When SHIELD was active, seven agents went missing in different parts of South America at different times. After SHIELD was disassembled, no more agents were sent down, but intelligence on so-called “extra-terrestrial attacks” continued to be gathered. After the attacks of 2012, the weird occurances suddenly didn’t seem so outlandish. Fury restarted the investigation and with the help of Tony’s advanced software, managed to find a pattern in the documented attacks. That is why Bucky and you are going to Brazil-- to try and witness and predict the next attack so they can figure out what they are and how to stop them.

The overhead light flickers on in the study. You blink a few times, your eyes adjusting to the flood of brightness. You hadn’t noticed how dark it had become in there.

Through your squinting you see Bucky stride into the room, his quiet confidence radiating off of him. “Reading in the dark?” he asks, a small smile appearing on his lips. You’re a little caught off guard to see him engaging you in conversation. The most you’ve ever spoken to him before this moment is when you were introduced, and that entire moment consisted of him him walking past the kitchen while Steve, Nat, Bruce, Sam, Tony, Wanda, Vision, and Rhodey were making their own acquaintances and Steve pointed to his fleeting figure saying “That’s Bucky.” and Tony adding “He doesn’t say much.”

“It wasn’t dark when I started reading.” You push together the papers into a neat pile and tuck them back into the folder. Bucky sits down on the couch across from you, his eyebrows knit together despite his general friendly demeanor. “Something wrong?”

“Nothing wrong, just thinking about this mission.”

“Are you nervous?”

He scoffs, and you roll your eyes.

“Are you one of those guys that chalks everything up to having seen worse?”

He cocks his head, pressing his lips together into a curious expression.

“I have lived through the second world war, being frozen, and an alien invasion or two. I’d say that’s seeing some shitty things and missions like these don’t really make me that nervous.”

“You never know. Seven other agents were probably thinking the same thing, and they were never seen again.”

He picks at a thread on the sleeve of his green henley, glancing up at you to make eye contact every so often.

“What, do you want me to be nervous?”

“It would be comforting to not be the only one.”

He chuckles softly. “[y/n], it’s gonna be fine. First mission jitters go away pretty quick.”

"When do we take off?" you shift the subject, feeling a little embarrassed at your comment about him "seeing worse". The man was a brainwashed assassin, who do you think you are to make statements like that? Even your shitty past can't compare to the baggage he must carry around with him.

"7am. You a morning person?"

"Usually yes."

"Then you're in charge of waking me up if I oversleep. Steve is gettin' real tired of mothering me."

"He would never tire of that." Bucky grins at that, nostalgia a glint in his eye.

"True." he mutters, standing and giving you a polite nod. "I'll see you in the morning."

You tell him goodnight and starts to head to the door before stopping and turning around halfway. He reaches over and flicks on a lamp that is sitting on a side table near you and then heads to the door, flipping off the much too bright overhead light. The lamp is the perfect amount of dim light for you to see, but not hurting your eyes. You shoot an appreciative smile at his back as he shuts the door to the study behind him.

Your head is whirling. Casual conversation with Bucky beyond the little squad of him, Steve, and Sam, is not something that you have seen often. He's nice, you observe, and quite laid back. Maybe this mission won't be as awkward as you fear it to be.

The sun is not yet up when you rise. The sound of birds chirping outside eases you into consciousness before your alarm can go off. Flipping over you press the screen of your tablet to see you have another half an hour before you planned to be awake. You're wide awake now, though, so you sit up and pull your legs into a crossed position and begin your morning meditation a little early.

You've been meditating for years. It's the only way you have found that truly helps you stay relaxed and control your powers, which is a difficult feat on its own. Being here has taken a toll on you lately, so you've practically tucked away your powers completely. When you were on your own, you used them constantly, figuring to make the best of a bad situation. Now, living with so many others, it feels wrong, like you're constantly being watched.

There's a knock at the door, and your eyes snap open. You get up and open the door to find Steve Rogers standing there.

"Did I wake you?"

"No, I was up."

"Good. Can we talk?" He looks past you, indicating he must want you to invite him in. You step back, unblocking the doorway from him. He comes in and sits at an armchair you have in the corner of your room. You sit back on your bed cross-legged and watch as he twiddles his thumbs a little before finally looking at you.

"No one knows what you can do," he says, his voice careful. "I'm sure that was obvious after Sam's outburst the other day."

Did they inject Captain America with mind reading powers too?

"Why not?"

"[y/n], you're powerful. You may be one of the most powerful people we have ever had under this roof. I know and Tony knows, but since we did not know the true nature of your powers, we did not want to make assumptions and try to explain something we don't understand."

"So you're saying if I want people to know who I am, it's up to me to talk about that."

A part of you is relieved. The stories of you usually cause people to fear you, and that is not something you like. Another part of you is filled with anxiety that the bullet is still sitting in the chamber and you will be the one to bite it.

"Basically yes. I just wanted to talk to you about this since you are going on a mission and that might be a good topic to bring up... ya know, for partner trust."

"Understood, Cap."

"Uh, yeah. Good."

There's a moment of silence.

"I see what Bucky says about you being a mother now." you chuckle.

"He said what?" Steve raises an eyebrow, a mischievous smile on his lips. The strange tension in the room breaks and you are relieved.

"Just that you have to wake him up for school."

"It was his words not mine, then." Steve laughs and stands up. "Good luck, [y/n]. Watch out for my pal too."

"Definitely."

Steve leaves. Butterflies erupt in your stomach, a testament to the new conversation that has been added to your list of things to do on this mission. At least you have something to talk about on the plane now, you suppose.

Sometimes you wish you could fly. Or were just strong and skilled like Natasha. Or had something, anything other than the mess of powers that you have. It would be easier that way. Fewer people would leave out of fear or misunderstanding. Maybe you would have real friends.

Maybe that's why you accepted the Avenger's offer. You have been racking your brain endlessly for the past few weeks trying to figure out why you wanted to be here so bad. Being solo was so much simpler, so much fewer rules. Yet, when Tony Stark showed up at your crummy apartment door, you decided on the spot that you were in. For someone that tends to overthink everything, you sure made that decision fast.

There is a community of other people here that have rough backstories, misunderstood abilities, the weight of the world on their shoulders. A part of you just needed some sort of connection.

You place the last of your packed clothes into your duffel bag and zip it up. Wheels up in an hour and a half. You slip on a pair of black leggings and a green short sleeve roll sleeve top. Topping the outfit off with your usual combat boots and tying your hair up in a bun, you look in the mirror, satisfied, and throw the bag over your shoulder.

Bucky's room is nearly on the other side of the complex. He's next to Steve's room, unsurprisingly. You walk over and stand outside his door, your hand hovering in the air as you debate whether to knock or not.

Was he joking yesterday about needing to be woken up?

Fuck, you really should have confirmed that.

You drop your hand and press your ear to the door, listening for any sort of movement. Silence.

"Screw it," you mutter to yourself, and you knock.

It's quiet at first, but a few moments later you hear rustling and the sound of someone groaning.

The door opens suddenly and you jump back in surprise. There stands Bucky, hair disheveled and matted on the side, eyes droopy and sleep fresh on his breath. Shirtless... very shirtless and wearing only a pair of thin cotton pajama pants hanging low on his hips. Your eyes snap back up to his face, your face red that you totally just let your eyes wander down his entire body.

"'m up" he slurs, wiping his mouth on the back of his hand.

"Uh huh," you nod, noticing some parallel straight lines practically carved into his forehead... someone fell asleep with his metal arm on his head. You restrain yourself from making any jokes and step back again to put some distance between the two of you. "Wheels up in an hour."

further updates can be found here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18701557/chapters/44353861

#bucky x reader #ao3 #no endgame spoilers #steve rogers #bucky barnes #james barnes #imagine #fanfiction #friends to lovers #pre infinity war #everything was happy and okay

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