#and the other one is really sweet but contains reference to that gross one so. evil blocked bad.

[orangelemonart]

I need more narusasu doujinshi recommendations NOW (thank you)

Lotta links here on this other post, but my three favorite (post-ending) one right now are:

Yukimichi by Nekodaisuki (fav fav fav)

Susanoo Kanraku by Aca Iro

Susanoo Roujyou by Aca Iro

There's also really funny one on pixiv that has not been translated that, from what I can tell through context, is about how terrorists hacked the security cameras in the hokage office and are threatening to release all the video they have of Naruto and Sasuke having weird office sex to the public. Obviously I can't speak to the dialogue but the visuals are not all that explicit-

HOWEVER! I am unwilling to link it because one of the suggestive scenes seems to be implying one of their weird sexcapades involved Naruto henge-no-jutsu-ed to look like he did pre-timeskip. That makes me so, so uncomfortable. And by uncomfortable I mean revolted and vaguely ill and I gotta skip that scene. But other than that it looks really funny. Pretty sure one of the pages has Naruto's Bill-Clinton-ass holding a press conference to say he did not have sex with that man. Good luck trying to find it on your own.

[jar-of-something-else]

LET THESE FREAKS FUCK NASTY!!

i'm sick and flipping tired of nobody letting heavy, pyro, or scout be insane and it's my american right to make it happen (this is for the anon that wanted mean pyro and for another anon that wanted heavy) (scout is for me)

under the cut obvs!!

WARNINGS: AFAB reader, crazy nsfw, CRINGE ASS DIALOGUE BITS!!!!! i wanted to try something new tell me if it's too gross and i'll stop and delete my whole account, mercs being MEAN!!!! also there's some russian (google translate russian) promise i'll provide translations <3

under 18 DNI !!!!!!!! please and thanks :)

Pyro:

-pyro has a neat little storage ottoman at the foot of his bed and guess what!! it's filled with sex toys!!!! who could have guessed!!!!!

-he's got a very wide variety of items 'cause he likes to keep it crazy; these items are included but not limited to: icy-hot (for temp play), handcuffs of many varieties, non-abrasive rope (for comfort), insane amounts of phallic rubber items (and glass he doesn't care) and just so so many more

-obvi the rope is used to tie you up but it's less shibari and more just restricting your movements by tying you to the bed/tying your arms and legs together

-obviously not the biggest talker (at least not anything you can understand), so whenever he wants to humiliate or degrade you, he'll grab your jaw and make you look into the goggles on his mask (it's a little scary) while he does whatever the hell to you

-not above teasing you in public and on the battlefield, he gets a laugh out of it

-touching a little more on the waxplay thing, pyro has a variety of candlesticks as well as regular candles in the jar containers. usually, he lets the ones in the jar burn for a bit until there's a pool of wax that he uses to cover larger areas on you, and the candlesticks are burnt while he drips the wax across your body

-into the idea of exhibitionism, hence the willingness to get you going in public areas, but he wouldn't actually want another person there during actual sex

-voyeurism on the other hand he is 100% down for

-wouldn't want to permanently damage you or anything, but pyro does like to use matches or a lighter to burn you just a teeny tiny little bit

Heavy:

-oh lord

-in my personal opinion, i think heavy is around 7 feet tall and 360-400 pounds so he's a BIG FUCKING GUY and obviously that's gonna translate to his dick

-more girth compared to length but sweet baby jesus it doesn't really matter at this point dude is SCARY big

-if you don't stop him (or if your begging doesn't get to him), he could prep you for hours on end. he wants to make sure he doesn't hurt you but another part of him very much enjoys overstimulating and making you beg for him to do something else

"Ты думаешь, что готов, маленький зайчик? Я не согласен. Мой член слишком велик для тебя." (you think you are ready little bunny? i disagree. my cock is just too big for you.)

-when heavy does finally decide to fuck you for real he goes wayyy too slow; he tells you it's for you to adjust but he just keeps dragging it out to tease you even more

-due to the whole "lets drag this thing out as long as possible" experience, it could lead to a lot of overstimulation. naturally, heavy's response to this is to just edge you until you're so desperate that you can't see straight

-like i mentioned in my first nsfw post, heavy has a BIG ASS breeding kink. he won't tell you (unless you know russian) but he does refer to himself as daddy when/if you let him cum inside you; he just thinks it's embarrassing after the fact and he doesn't wanna tell you

"Ты был так хорош для папы, ты заслуживаешь награды." (you've been so good for daddy, you deserve a reward)

Scout:

-my favorite part of the whole post !!!

-very very fast paced (obviously) and does enjoy slightly disorienting you with the speed he does things. whether he's fingering you, eating you out, or actually fucking you he makes sure to speed up as a little surprise

-sometimes he'll go hard enough to make his (or your) bed frame rock against the wall and he will rub it in the other mercs faces if someone knocks on the door to get you guys to shut up

"Oh wassat? You jealous I'm gettin' laid and you're not? Take that shiny bald head of yours and shove it up your ass, pal, I'm a little busy in here!" (could be talking to heavy or engineer you choose)

-i mentioned scout calling himself daddy in my last post (which IS canon i double checked) and it just got me thinkin so hard....he doesn't let you call him by his real name while he's fucking you, otherwise he'll stop what he's doing completely until you say it

"I don't know much about dis Jeremy guy you keep talkin' about, but it's startin' ta piss me off how often you're sayin' his name. Why don't you tell me who's really fuckin' ya this well, huh doll? Go ahead n' say it fa daddy." (i tried to write out his accent i love it so much but i'm so sorry to boston)

-whenever spy is out on a mission and you and scout are back at base he will sneak into spy's smoking room with you and fuck there. scout doesn't appreciate the subtle flirts he sees spy send your way, so he likes to give him a little reminder of who you chose to be with (even if it's in the form of cum stains on spy's velvet couch)

[onceamadhouse13]

The Gaylor Issue: An Attempt at Nuance from a Very Tired Queer

I feel like the Gaylor issue is so divisive and polarizing in the Swiftie fandom. I want to make space for nuance, acceptance, and a more relaxed conversation. And I want to make space for fans who don’t fit on either extreme end of the issue.

On one side, you have diehard Gaylors who insist that Taylor is OBVIOUSLY gay and that all her “boyfriends,” including Joe, have been beards. See also: Kaylor, Swiftgron, etc.

On the other side, you have the people who insist that Gaylors are delusional, her relationship with Joe is real, and Taylor is nothing more than an ally to the LGBTQ community. Side note: I really dislike the term “hetlor” because a) it feels mean and gross when said in a demeaning way, and b) believing she’s straight is the default so I feel like giving them their own term is in the realm of “straight pride.”

Sprinkled between these camps are the people who say stuff like, “It’s weird and gross to speculate about real people’s sexuality. Taylor is a private person and it isn’t our place to talk about her love life.” Or, “Speculating about people’s queerness is bad because it forces people out of the closet before they’re ready.” Which is very kind.

I feel like I don’t fit into either of these three groups.

Saying “Taylor’s relationship with Joe is fake” feels really dismissive of bisexuality. Bi people are the biggest segment of the LGBTQ community and somehow it seems like people forget they exist because they float in that middle ground. When we view the world through binaries, bi people seem like they’re full of contradictions. But, like all people, bi people just contain multitudes.

Saying Taylor is straight seems downright ridiculous, at least to me. The most obvious, “no heterosexual explanation for this” pieces of evidence are: the song Paris, the lyric “I swear you could hear a hairpin drop,” the 13 in northern Michigan in the Lavender Haze music video, and the idea that gay pride “makes me ME.” Here are some things I believe to be true: 1) If Taylor Swift were straight, she’d be too good of an ally to queerbait, and 2) Taylor Swift is too smart/well-read to make queer references accidentally.

The thing about the “don’t speculate about her personal life” argument is that speculating about Taylor Swift’s personal life pays her bills. Yes, she’s making and selling art. But she has chosen a life in the spotlight. She has consciously decided to sell her [personhood, brand, name, soul, whatever you want to call it]. She has chosen NOT to “take the money and her dignity and get the hell out.” She COULD choose the rose garden over Madison Square. But every day, she chooses not to. On the one hand, this “don’t speculate” argument is very noble. But there’s some part of me that wonders if the folks in this camp see themselves as potential future friends of Taylor and think that being speculative ruins their chances at that, ruins their chances of attending a secret session, etc. It’s sweet and kind AND it feels a little “pick me.” Here are some things I believe to be true: 1) If Taylor Swift were straight, she wouldn’t be offended that people think she is queer. 2) If Taylor Swift is queer, she’s not offended that people think she is queer.

And then there’s this weird, in-between camp that I fall into. Personally, I think Taylor Swift is a queer woman who is currently in a legitimate, long term relationship with her boyfriend Joe Alwyn. Do I think that she had relations of some kind with Karlie Kloss? Yeah, probably! Do I think that she is afraid to come out for fear of outing past lovers? Yeah, probably! Do I think she is afraid to come out for fear of alienating part of her fanbase? Yeah, probably! Do I think she is afraid to come out because she feels like her current relationship with a man will “delegitimize” her queerness? Definitely.

I want a label for people who have this opinion, because I see SO much hatred toward “Gaylors” from “Hetlors” and vice versa. I feel like I have a nuanced, reasonable, rational take on the situation. And I want to be able to communicate this nuanced take with a label.

Here are my suggestions.

Nuance Gaylor

Pro-Joe Gaylor

We Contain Multitudes Gaylor

Gaylor (Joe’s Version)

Please don’t be mad at me Gaylor

Anyway, thank you for reading this. Please feel free to chime in but please don’t send me hate mail.

[analexthatexists]

Here he is, my Regretevator OC! His name's Cecil and he works at a cake factory inspired by Make a Cake And Feed the Giant Noob!

He was a normal guy until he fell into one of those vats of colorful frosting/cake batter (You know, the ones from MCAFGN that turn you into a walking, living cake?) and basically turned into a giant kaiju cake monster that destroyed stuff. It was only until workers realized he could be turned back to normal when exposed to large amounts of water. Exposure or consumption of too many sugary substances or foods will cause him to transform while water can weaken, irritate, or revert him back to normal. Regardless, he's still forever stuck in his current half-cake-ified form.

Elevator Floor

I think his floor would be a boss battle-themed one where you'd have to fight his beast form after he slips on a banana peel and falls into a large container of frosting. The battle in question would probably work like one of those Story game boss fights (like the ones in Field Trip Z and Break In) If you manage to defeat him, he'll turn back to normal and join the Regretevator. It would be styled around MCAFGN and I guess the battlefield could be some large workspace with conveyers and vats/containers of toppings/frosting/ingredients around the area.

Dialogue

Idle -...Ugh...Can barley see with this gunk in my face... (Where's it even coming from...?) -This elevator smells weird... (Not as overwhelming as the factory though...) -...I'm starving...Anyone got any food? (Preferably something that's not sweet...) -I wonder how work is back at the factory... (...That place is so accident-prone...) -I'm so hungry... I could eat a hu- HORSE. Horse. -Pfft!...I got frosting in my mouth... -My head hurts...Can't think straight... -...Having horns is...actually kind of cool... (Maybe this isn't so bad after all...) -Hmm...Something smells good...Oh, wait, that's just me... -...Sorry for almost killing you guys back there, by the way... (You guys don't mind, do you...?) -It's so...small in here... I feel so cramped... (How do you guys even tolerate this...?) -I can't even recall the last time I stepped out of the factory... (...This is a nice change, though...) -...When did I start drooling? My...My bad...That's gross... -...so...hungry... -For a small elevator, a lot sure does happen in here... (I...Kind of like being in here...) Leaving Elevator -I should really be heading back to work now... -Better make sure everyone's safe and sound... -Sorry if I left any frosting behind... -I can't take this...I need to find food... Interacted with Petal Cone Oh god, it's stuck in my frosting... ...Thanks? ...What is this. What are you- oh god get it off me. pfft- pbbt- oh god- what- is this- why- ...It won't get off my hand... Interacted with Spray Bottle HEY, KNOCK THAT OFF, YOU'LL SPOIL ME! MY FROSTING'S GOING TO BE ALL MESSED UP... QUIT IT... HEY, THAT'S- GAH- COLD, COLD... I'M NOT GOING TO HURT YOU, STOP SPRAYING ME! STOP, STOP! YOU ALREADY TURNED ME BACK! Interacted with C4 WHY THE HECK WOULD YOU DO THAT!? WH- BLEGH! AAAAAAAGH, I HATE CONFETTI! NO NO NO NO! HEY, WHAT WAS THAT FOR!? HRK- IT GOT IN MY MOUTH- HOW DARE YOU!- PFT- (If you think I'm going to write the relationship dialogue with other NPCs, you're crazy.)

Trivia

-A major reference for Cecil's design and partial inspiration for the "giant kaiju cake monster" idea was Wafer from Tower Heroes, especially the 4th and 5th stage designs -He’s bisexual -Cecil wouldn't get along with Bive due to their speculative and investigative nature, especially seeing Bive would probably treat them like a test subject or a specimen -Cecil likes potato salad and muffins -Before the accident, Cecil's job was to make sure everything was running correctly and eliminating accidents before they happened, making what happened to him ironic -He's terrified of Enphoso and Reddy -Gregoriah and Cecil would probably get along due to their shared associations with large corporations and common workplace accidents that always screw them up somehow -Tasting the frosting that covers/makes up parts of Cecil would taste like very artificial strawberry frosting. He also smells similar -The candle of Cecil's head never extinguishes unless he dies -Despite half his body consisting of strawberry frosting, he actually prefers chocolate

[gggoldfinch]

what are your thoughts on romulus in general? and specifically on the alien baby

HOHHHHH BOY IM SO GLAD YOU ASKED because i am THE avp universe junkie around these parts and this movie CHANGED ME AS A PERSON!!!!!!!!! i screamed my whole way home from the imax theater. I’ll put my scatterbrained thoughts under the cut so anyone who wants to avoid spoilers can!

First off: it’s immediately top 3 Alien franchise movies for me. Alien, Aliens, Romulus; That’s my new top 3 list. I like the story of Rom more than Aliens but I’m more attached to the characters in Aliens than Rom so in that way they’re kinda tied for my #2 spot.

Honestly I thought it was the best sci-fi and/or horror that’s come out in fucking eons!!! I was thoroughly on edge throughout the runtime and even got genuinely scared a few times. I spent the whole movie with my hand over my mouth in shock, no joke. The suspense KILLED ME!!!!!!!! The build up to each event was just phenomenal and just when you thought it was about to get better for the characters NOPE! I went into it completely blind, no notion of the plot whatsoever, and was SO thoroughly pleased with the outcome.

CAN WE TALK ABOUT THE SET DESIGN AND PRACTICAL EFFECTS???? Such a breath of fresh air after TOO MANY movies lately have been relying solely on cgi, including the most recent installments in the Alien franchise. It’s so nice to watch a character react to a thing that’s actually physically right next to them. And all the scenes of the space station reminded me of Alien Isolation, which I really enjoyed. It truly brought the game to life and with it that grand, expansive, yet claustrophobically contained sense of dread that comes with being stranded on a Weyland-Yutani space station. It looked SO convincing. And of course I’m just forever in love with the retrofuture 70’s aesthetic of the franchise and am so glad they keep up with it (almost) every time

I was also delighted we got to see the inclusion of an on-world setting. The mining colony scene in the beginning was really what sold me that the movie was about to be fantastic

HR Giger would have been proud of all the gross imagery. Truly. During the wall womb thing scene I leaned over to my best friend and went “that’s a PUSSY bro” because I mean DID YOU SEE IT. Rom really returned to its roots, it reminded me SO MUCH of the original in its overall vibe.

The one single thing I did not like was the zombie ai deepfake of Ian Holm (who has been dead since 2020 if you didn’t know). That was a little uhhhh ummm yikes. Not to mention the cgi on “him” was ROUGH at times. I get the idea of using a time period relevant synthetic (since from what I understand Rom takes place less than a year after the events of Alien, given the whole Nostromo salvage arc) but they could have easily cast someone new as a different model, or even brought in Michael Fassbender as an “older” model. Canonically Lance Henriksen (who would have to be de-aged up the wazoo) being brought in as a Bishop model wouldn’t have made sense (since Bishop’s model was manufactured shortly before Aliens, according to the Xenopedia) but I mean hey. they retcon canon all the time who cares lol. However as a diehard I do get how his model was canonically relevant to the time period and scenario, so I understand the thought process tbqf. The execution was just… questionable.

I’ve seen a lot of people with braindead takes that the references and callbacks to the original movies fell flat or were unnecessary, but I thought they were very well placed and tied the stories together wonderfully. Who could hate a “get away from her you BITCH” line?????? Clearly these people aren’t diehards LOL because everyone in my theater LOVED that

I loved Rain and Andy SO MUCH. They were so sweet, and I love the concept of treating synths like real people/ family members (i’m a sucker and am Blade Runner brainrotted). They were the only characters I really felt anything for, other than Kay as her story progressed. The others felt a little one-dimensional, but admittedly there really wasn’t a lot of opportunity to flesh any of them out that much. I am of course a sucker for sweet synths and Andy’s character reminded me of Bishop in a lot of ways, which I think may have been intentional in some aspects (i.e. his desire to be referred to as an artificial person). I won’t really go into analyzing the characters since I don’t really care enough about them to do so (I was more into this movie for the story, unlike some others in the franchise), but I did enjoy a couple of them so that’s good enough for me.

My best friend asked me whose death was my favorite and honestly it was probably Tyler’s— a truly classic way to go out in an Alien movie (I gasped when the other xenos were revealed during that scene). I also made the point to him that the chestburster that came out of Navarro came out of her upper chest region rather than lower down by the bottom of her ribcage (which is traditionally where they come out of, based off the original writer’s intention for it to represent the pain of a Crohn’s disease flare (which I can attest to)), so I’m hypothesizing that they removed the facehugger before it was finished implanting the embryo and it grew in her esophagus rather than her stomach. Yes? Yes. Brutal!

AND THE OFFSPRING !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! When I tell you my entire crowded theater bristled and gasped in sheer unadulterated HORROR! I think I was the first one out of 50 people to audibly go “oh god no” then like 15 others followed LMFAO it was a group trauma experience for all of us; my best friend looked like he was going to fucking sob. I was anticipating something with how Kay’s story progressed, but I did not fucking expect THAT. I thought it was gonna be something with her after that shot of the rat mutating, not her baby. My first thought (after recoiling in horror) was how it fucking LOOKED LIKE AN ENGINEER!!!!! Consider: the engineers made humans in their image, therefore logically evolved humans would begin to look like the engineers. Perhaps if the method had been perfected the offspring would have looked more engineer and less… xenomorph-human-engineer-bastard-spawn from the deepest pit of hell. Horrific. I FUCKING LOVED IT AND I WAS LITERALLY PETRIFIED. It was a nice tie in with all the wacky shit we saw in Prom/Cov. I also thought it was somewhat of parallel with Alien Resurrection too, even how the thing looked a little bit.

All in all, I personally would give it a 5/5 stars. I’m going to see it again sometime this week. I fucking LOVE this franchise.

[absolutebl]

Hi! Sorry in advance for how long this post is going to be. I have so many things to ask.

I'm mostly obsessed with Thai BLs at the moment, but I do want to diversify, so what are the top recommendations for Korean, Japanese and Taiwanese? I don't like too much angst or conflict. As in, I could barely get through series like Theory of Love and Never Let Me Go.

Your BL linguistics and honourifics posts helped me a lot when I was but a newbie in this world. Ah, good times. Anyways. What I wanted to ask is, taking inspiration from, and with (credited) reference to your posts, can i make a post of my own? It will only be on Thai. I just want to compile all the things I've learnt so far.

I was sniffing around MyDramaList (for reasons) and found Water Boyy. Is it worth watching? Also, Boys over Flowers (F4 version). I really don't want to watch het romance unless it's really, really good.

You don't have to answer this, it's just for my own curiosity. I'm thinking of making a EarthMix TharnType AU with role reversal. So far I have Mix as Tharn, Earth as Type (yes, i got the idea from Love by Chance), Tay or New as Thorn (Tong is so much better as Tankhun. Also, in this, Thorn is also ver gay, hence TayNew), Love or Film as Thanya, and of course, the crowning gem, Neo Trai as Techno. Question is, who should I cast as Lhong (better if its GMMTV since i know them best, but other agencies are also good.)

Last but definitely not least, I respect you a lot. And i love your blog. Irrelevant, but I wanted to ask, how was today's Boss and Babe (ep. 4)?

Moving on from Thai BL

1a. I'm mostly obsessed with Thai BLs at the moment, but I do want to diversify, so what are the top recommendations for Korean, Japanese and Taiwanese?

Sure thing. Read the descriptions of my top 10, they will let you know how soft the different dramas are. (I like soft and sweet a lot myself, so there are always many in there).

This one needs to be updated, I added quite a few more to my 9/10 list for Korea since then. But with Our Dating Sim and The New Employee this year is going to require it to be updated AGAIN. (Both highly recommended for your needs)

This one is mostly up to date.

This one is totally up to date.

Low Angst, Low Conflict, Soft BL

1b. I don't like too much angst or conflict. As in, I could barely get through series like Theory of Love and Never Let Me Go.

Here are some lists for ya:

Don't watch Waterboyy.

3a. I was sniffing around MyDramaList (for reasons) and found Water Boyy. Is it worth watching?

NO. Avoid all versions. It's terrible. I mean, if you are completest you have to but otherwise... NO.

Boys over Flowers is gross

3b. watch F4?

I am sorry to all the stans out there, but I LOATHE this franchise. I've watch a number of them, always hoping a new remake will make it palatable. NO. I hate all of them. All the worst tropes of a reverse harem. I am intersted (like Twilight) in understanding WHY it's so popular but personally, it gives me the disgust willies. Yech.

This is why I want it gay. Would that make it palatable?

I suppose the one form Laos is the only one I even kinda enjoyed and it is by far the worst production values. I gave it up 1/2 way through. I think I watched 3 eps of F4. No thank you.

Honestly if you want this kind of het toxicity, I think Heirs is a better version of these tropes. Also it's legacy Kdrama so will tell you a lot abouy that industry and what toxic tropes they love (and still employ) even in their BL.

4. who should I cast as Lhong?

Khaotung? First? 5. Last but definitely not least, I respect you a lot. And i love your blog. Irrelevant, but I wanted to ask, how was today's Boss and Babe (ep. 4)?

Aw, thank you so much!

I haven't watched it yet. Tonight!

Lunch, regression analysis all afternoon, dinner with one of my adorable exes, then Jack o'Frost, B&B, and Boys' Planet... in that order.

[lil-tachyon]

Hey logan, i'm trying to get into sci fi more, do you have any media, movies or otherwise you'd say it's a must watch for someone starting to get into it? Thanks

Super broad question! And precisely the thing I love to talk about. Although unfortunately I really don’t watch a lot of movies or TV so the best I can do for you is list some stuff I like and hope that you find something you enjoy. If we were talking sci-fi literature, that’s something I would probably write a full essay on- if anyone’s interested in reading my thoughts on that and getting my really long list of recommendations, just let me know. I might even do it on my own anyway, just for fun…

I guess if we’re going to talk about “must-watch” sci-fi movies then we have to talk about Star Wars first just to get it out of the way. I’ll keep it brief, far too much ink has been spilt regarding this franchise and you can find more in-depth opinions somewhere else. The original trilogy is great- there’s a reason it launched one of the biggest media franchises of the past 45 years. Endlessly rewatchable, somehow still looks better than basically any other big budget SFF popcorn movie and just plain fun. If you somehow haven’t seen the OT yet, get to it. 

You don’t really need to watch any other Star Wars stuff aside from the OT. The prequels aren’t exactly essential and they’re unquestionably worse in terms of dialog, acting, pacing (i.e. the nuts and bolts of storytelling.) If you’ve never watched Star Wars before you won’t have any nostalgia for them so you can skip them. Don’t even bother with the Disney sequels- pointless and incoherent. If you DO for some reason want more Star Wars in your life I can give you two recommendations: 

First is the masterpiece that is Genndy Tartakovsky’s (creator of Samurai Jack) Star Wars: Clone Wars (2003) (no, not the CGI Clone Wars show you’re probably thinking of). Split into 25 episodes ranging in length from two to twelve minutes, the whole show is only about two hours long but boy is it sweet. There are no main characters and not much in the way of an overarching plot. Instead the show is composed of a series of rapid-fire vignettes that take place across the entire Star Wars galaxy and tell dozens of unique microstories. It’s pulpy and fun and never takes itself too seriously and the whole thing is on YouTube because for some reason Disney actually hates everything that made Star Wars good and hasn’t taken the time to copyright strike it.

Second recommendation is the Mandalorian. I didn’t believe it when people started raving about it, but it really is great and tells a poignant, self-contained, original story. It’s not perfect and it definitely suffers from the Disneywars curse of really obnoxious references to the OT, but it’s absolutely worth the watch.

Damn that’s so much more time than I wanted to spend on Star Wars. I always forget how much of a SW geek I am until I start talking about it…

Quick list of the other big “essentials” that I’ve seen and can recommend before I get into more personal stuff (in no particular order):

Alien (1979) - Weird and creepy and gross and with impeccable visual design in every single frame. I need to rewatch it, only seen it once.

Akira (1988) - Massive, groundbreaking, unsettling, beautiful. Brought cyberpunk into the visual realm, brought anime to the West in a whole new way. I could rewatch it a hundred times. 

2001: A Space Odyssey (1968) - A foundational film that moves at a foreboding crawl and leaves you feeling unsafe and unsure of what you just watched. (Also my dad’s band referenced the monkey scene in their big-label debut music video, so that should be reason enough to watch it)

Close Encounters of the Third Kind (1977) - UFOs, the American West, and the most 70s-looking cast imaginable. It feels more a product of its time than most of the others on this list, but I love it for that and it does nothing to make it any less impactful or engrossing.

The Terminator (1984) and Terminator 2: Judgement Day (1991) - I waited waaaaaay too long to watch these. I only got around to seeing them this past year in fact. I had always just written them off in my head as nothing more than cheesy 80s action flicks but my God are they good and so much different from what I expected. The first one is basically a sci-fi slasher film and the second is probably the best sequel film I’ve ever seen and takes everything in a totally different direction that still manages to build on all the groundwork laid by the first. Please watch, don’t be like me and wait until you’re twenty-six. 

Nausicaä of the Valley of the Wind (1984) - My favorite Ghibli movie. For being a film about people flying airships and fighting bugs in a giant toxic jungle, it really has a lot of important stuff to say and says it very well.

Castle in the Sky (1988) - Hits a lot of the same plot beats as Nausicaä and, imo, suffers a little bit in comparison but still a great anime sci-fantasy romp. 

The Thing (1982) - Disgusting sci-fi horror in the glacial Antarctic wastes

The Twilight Zone (1959-1964) - The first, the best. Sure, it’s inconsistent in terms of quality, but it’s at least consistently weird and inventive and the good episodes are really damn good. Also something I love about it is the acting- it’s very over-the-top expressive and exaggerated. Feels more like it’s meant for the stage than for the small screen. You don’t see a lot of TV like that these days. 

The X-Files (1993-2002, 2016-2018) - Absolutely in my top 5 TV shows. It was great to watch as a 14-year-old because I was still young enough to find it scary, and it’s great on every re-watch because I can really appreciate how much chemistry Gillian Anderson and David Duchovny have and how fun, goofy, and overall weird it is. As I recall it starts to decline noticeably in season 8. Season 9 you’ll have to grit your teeth to get through. The 2016-2018 revival is half composed of unwatcheable “storyline” episodes and half surprisingly good-to-great “monster of the week” episodes.

Cowboy Bebop (1998-1999) - My number one favorite anime, I love everything about it. So much effort goes into small background details and characters that only appear for a few seconds and it really goes a long way to making the whole universe of the show feel so real that you could see yourself living in it. Also the soundtrack is top-notch, I listen to it regularly. 

Neon Genesis Evangelion (1995-1996) and End of Evangelion (1997) - Another one that I took too long to get to and to be honest I probably would’ve been more into it had I watched it when I was younger, but it’s still great and I recommend it. Features a classic “inflation suit” episode

Stuff that’s less “essential” but I really like it:

Planetes (2003-2004) - My second favorite anime. Starts off as a workplace slice-of-life and slowly builds into a really, really emotional conclusion. Can’t recommend it enough.

Forbidden Planet (1956) - A sci-fi adaptation of Shakespeare’s The Tempest (I’m an illiterate piece of shit so I can’t tell you how good an adaptation it is). It’s slow-paced and eerie, and way more atmospheric than its decidedly 1950s visuals would lead you to believe.

Digimon: The Movie (2000) / Summer Wars (2009) - A short story: as a kid I probably watched the Digmon Movie about a million times. It was huge with kids my age and was probably an entire generation’s first introduction to ska-punk. It’s a great movie. Anyway, fast forward about a decade and a half and at some point I sit down to watch Summer Wars with my brother on no other information than that we heard it’s good. And it is! But pretty soon into the movie we both notice something odd- it seems to feature almost the exact same plot as the Digmon Movie. After a bit of digging we find out that they were both directed by the same guy and it seems he just had this idea in his head for a story that he really wanted to make for over a decade because Summer Wars is basically a more mature and less merchandisable remake. Watch them both!

Samurai Jack (2001-2004, 2017) - the first cartoon I saw as a kid that really made me say “finally, something for me!” I wouldn’t get another TV show aimed at me that was “cool” and “epic” and “badass” until ATLA came out. Nothing beats watching a samurai fight a million robots and bounty-hunters on an endless quest to go back to the past. Also the season 5 revival is great and I genuinely don’t get why a lot of people seemed to really hate on it. 

Moon (2009) - It’s been a LONG time since I watched it, but I liked it quite a bit. A lonely lunar miner runs into what seems to be his double and things get spooky…

Prospect (2018) - More space miners running into trouble! Really great costume and prop design on a super small budget (but you wouldn’t know it from how good it looks). 

Mobile Suit Gundam 0080: War in the Pocket (1989) - Listen- I’m not a gundam guy. I don’t care about all the different robots and I’m not about to watch 40 years of TV to try and figure out the story. Which is why War in the Pocket is great because it’s six episodes long and it just tells a really touching story punctuated by cool robot battles and you don’t need to know anything about Gundam to enjoy it.

Royal Space Force: The Wings of Honnêamise (1987) - A story about a space race set on an alternate world. What really sets it apart is the visual design- every detail from books, to currency, to texts to vehicles, to architecture is unique enough to feel totally alien but also grounded enough to somehow feel familiar. It’s quite an achievement. Trigger Warning: there’s a very uncomfortable rape scene in the middle of the film that seems to come out of nowhere. I’m still not sure why they chose to include it.

Jin-Roh: The Wolf Brigade (1999) - Military police get up to some real nasty stuff in alternate history fashy 1950s Japan. Very depressing, all my friends complained to me about how sad it was even though they went into it knowing what it was about and agreeing to watch it with me. You just can’t win sometimes!

That’s about all I have for now. I know it’s all kind of basic bitch stuff but like I said, I don’t often watch movies/TV. Hope it helps and thanks for the great question!

[llycaons]

now that I’ve gone through the entire tag (some pages twice) it’s time to settle down and sort through the one thousand, eight hundred (!!!!) works in my marked for later. not-so-quick note on my personal preferences, and what you can expect to be included or excluded from my rec list

so, in general my favorite fanfic tropes can be categorized as hurt/comfort and angst with a happy ending. as reflected from the source material, I read and may recommend works containing graphic, disturbing, or potentially triggering content, including writing related to sexual assault, grief/mourning, trauma, and suicide. I will summarize each work, but please note the tags and warnings on any fic listed here if that’s a concern for you.

on the flipside, I do not read works that end unhappily - all these end hopefully at the very least. no main characters will die who aren’t already dead in canon, wx will always be together or getting there (or, in the case of sad flashback-era fics, will eventually get there), and many of these works reflect themes of healing, recovery, and finding peace. I’ll make note of any exceptions, but there are pretty strong preferences for me, so there won’t be many. and I like sweet and fluffy things too, as well as humor and interpersonal drama and worldbuilding and action - there will be a mix of various types or works

this is an 18+ rec list! explicit works will be on here in any category. additionally, what else the author has written may or may not affect whether I rec something, but I’ll make a note if I know there’s an issue. I also can’t guarantee all authors will be vetted, but I can make a note for authors whose works I trust completely not to be weird or gross

fics recommended in this list are guaranteed NOT to have the following, and please let me know if I mistakenly included anything containing them:

pedophilia/csa, teacher/student relationship, sexual ageplay, or any couple with a canon age gap (even nhs with mxy, or lxc with jc)

incest, including wwx with jc, and jin ling with lzs (the canon incest may be mentioned, but I find that comes up rarely in works I read)

romanticized rape (incl. sex under duress or when unable to consent); everything under the umbrella of ‘noncon’, ‘dubcon’, fuck or die, sex pollen, sex curses, drunk sex scenes, warprize, nonconsensual (or even consensual) somnophilia, necrophilia, etc - unless treated as a traumatic experience - I have several SA recovery works bookmarked and in my MFL

*note on novel ‘canonical kinks’ - a couple of fics do obliquely reference rape fantasy, but they’re few and far between, and there are no actual scenes depicting it. I will mark them so readers will know

abusive wwx or lwj (or anyone not already abusive)

dark!wwx or lwj (🙄)

xy/xxc unless it’s treated as fucky

genderbends/cisswap

fics feminizing wwx - some gray area since he’s gnc in the novel and I really do like seeing that explored; there is one exception to this rule and it will be marked

RPF

A/B/O

cop AUs

CEO wwx or lwj (except for parody)

character x reader

h*rry p*tter

asexual or demisexual wwx and/or lwj: I don’t have an issue with any other characters being aro or ace but they just didn’t come up very often

plus more that I habitually avoid and assume everyone following me does too, but I’m drawing a blank rn. feel free to message me to add more

due to personal preference, there will be also be no, or very little of the following:

crossovers

meet-cutes, hook-ups, breakup fics (even if they get back together), friends with benefits, fake dating/relationship

self inserts

reincarnation

soulmate AUs

age regression (even if non-sexual)

camboy/stripper/sex worker/brothel/courtesan AUs (they’re usually awful but I do have one exception)

kinky stuff besides bdsm. not what I’m here for

*bdsm fic is not something I particularly seek out or enjoy, but since it’s kind of unavoidable so you can expect a fair amount of that

*like I really dislike reading orgasm delay/denial but it’s everywhere so *shrug*

*spanking and more specific kinks like petplay, watersports, inflation, tentacle shit, etc. will not show up since I don’t like them

any reference to the PM kiss unless it’s treated with the gravity is should be

time travel

youtube/socmed, high school, robots/androids, sports, office, assassin, spy, royalty, science fiction, idol, shapeshifting, reality tv, celebrity, mafia, actor, professor, military, or fairy tale AUs

significant canon divergence AUs

significant fix-its

junior-centric (and anything where they’re shipped with each other or anyone else)

fics over 3 chapters (with a handful of exceptions)

Hanahaki disease

mpreg: obviously trans men and and do get pregnant, but I’m wary of anything tagged mpreg since generally speaking, this type of fic is quite weird about trans men. also some mpreg is literally about cis men getting pregnant which like...???

threesomes...sorry, there are just no good ones that people write very much about

podfics/video format

fics that try to pretend like myu was a good mother lmao

I have the tag ‘oblivious wwx’ blacklisted so that might tell you something

if jc is there, people are probably bullying him, but I dislike fics written by jc haters as much as by uncritical jc fans

drawn-out miscommunication for the sake of romantic angst. super annoying

juniors shipping wx 🙄

I have ‘possessive lwj’ blacklisted but this is also something else that’s sort of everywhere; if it’s present it’s either recognized as a flaw and well-controlled, or isn’t very significant

also, the only couples I really read about or rec are

wx (number one, baby - most other couples are usually background sorry but nothing overshadows Them)

mianqing

yanqing (MAYBE)

songxiao

xuanli

nielan (background only)

xiyao (as a toxic or past relationship only)

cssr/wcz (background only)

ONE instance of wq/jc

one-sided nhs/wwx

yaoyang lmao

wq/wwx, sexually but not romantically. like platonic BM-era comfort sex

+ random one-offs like wlj/wq, jc/jzx, and others, perhaps (??)

if you’re still reading, thanks <3

[itssuppertim3]

Skyrim Husbandos and Their Ideal Dates:

Ulfric Stormcloak: The last time he even thought of going on a date was probably way back in his younger days. Literally the only thing on his mind is politics, so if you were to ask him out, it would take quite a bit of convincing before he finally accepts.

Since he has such little experience, he tends to act awkward during the first few outings. He trips over his words, his cheeks redden, all the cute stuff. Since Ulfric barely has any free time, the type of dates he prefers is late night dining, long strolls within the city walls, and (if the war has ended) horseback riding. Who would’ve known such an egotistical guy likes the simple things.

Veezara: Veezara would most definitely enjoy taking his s/o on contract dates. What’s better than sitting together under in the moonlight, a wine bottle in one hand, a knife in the other? And if you aren’t really a big fan of murder, he’s got a better idea:

He’ll come visit you in the late hours of the night and give all kinds of trinkets he received from his… endeavors. Then, he’ll pull you out of your window and carry you bridal style until you’re both plopped down beside a riverbank, watching the vast sea of starts shimmering from above. Plus, since he is Argonian, he’ll literally force you to go skinny dipping with him.

Argis the Bulwark: He’s a total sucker for taking baths with you. There’s nothing he likes more than holding you tightly in his arms while soaking in a tub filled with hot water. And being bare is all the better ;) He melts into jelly when you start massaging his scalp, too. If you want this man to absolutely crumble under your touch, his scalp is a perfect start.

If the two of you are feeling a little adventurous, he'll even spar with you for a few hours. At first he was very worried that he might hurt you. Yeah, that thought quickly abandoned him and your sweet sparring session raged into an all out battle.

Teldryn Sero: Could go either way with him. Honestly as long as he gets to spend time with you, he doesn’t care. If he had to choose though, he’d have a whole day planned out for just the two of you.

First, he’ll wake you up with breakfast in bed. Then he’ll take you out in town and simply roam around with you for as long as your heart desires. And when he hears your stomach growl, there’s no, “I guess we can stop by the inn for a bite to eat.” Just— no! To blazes with the inn. This mer’s gonna treat his dear right, and how else would he do that without offering to cook a grand dinner for them? Few have gotten the luxury of tasting his cooking, and he wants to keep it that way.

Ancano: Asking you out would probably be the hardest bit. I mean look at him. Does he look like the type to casually approach someone he fancies and request to spend the evening with him? He might as well be falling to his knees and peppering their boots with kisses! Well… he somewhat manages. He’ll have to ignore that gross amount of pride stirring within and ask you on the spot. And when you say yes, he looks even more pissed than he did before. In reality, he’s so ecstatic he can hardly breathe.

Sadly, it won’t be as extravagant as he wishes. Usually it’ll just be sharing a drink or two in your quarters as you ramble about how your day went. Much to your surprise, he really loves it. Sure, sitting in silence while you’re busy studying is also nice, but hearing you speak only to him gets him all giddy inside.

Miraak: You want to ask him out on a date? Oh, he'll be so delighted that he won't even try to contain his joy. What do you want to do first? Where do you want to go? He'll gladly take you there. Miraak is pretty sensitive when it comes to dates, which goes completly against his brutish nature. It's like he's become a different person! I mean look at the man. He hasn't been in an actual relationship in a good 3000 years. He'll cherish every second.

One thing he'd really, really like to do is take you out on his dragon .... his real dragon-- not his other drag-- oh, never mind. He'll hold your waist snuggly against him, his head resting atop of yours as you both cast your sights far onto the horizon.

Additionally, he'll also give you a tour of his temple. You'll tell him that you've already explored it, but there's no changing his mind. Miraak will take your hand and lead you into every room and chamber. "This is the torture room. You can just step over that skeleton-- be careful not to trigger that pressure plate... or that one. Anyway--"

Savos Aren: I feel like he'd make a date out of anything. If you need help with an experiment, why not call it a date? Or if you both are nurturing the herbs in his garden, heck that'll be a date too! He's refers to any of these trivial moments as such in order to make them more special. He doesn't want you to feel bored in his presence, so he tries to be romantic even in the most hectic of hours.

Sometimes he'll show up at your quarters with a precious bouqet of flowers and proceed to kiss your hand. It sweeps you off your feet every single time.

[baronesscmd]

@anubis-005 has graciously allowed me to continue writing her sinfully delightful Nene’s Inferno Au, so I bring you the next installment. I hope you enjoy, and thank you. And go check out all her artwork; its absolutely amazing and deserves all the love!

AH! DISCLAIMER! CONTAINS SCENES OF SEXUAL INNUENDO/REFERENCES/SITUATIONS!

 He dropped himself to the ground, pulling her flush against him. One hand curled around her arm as the other caught her chin, bringing her gaze directly to the smoldering golden stare that was attempting to burn her alive. 

Nene's face flushed as he leaned in, tongue flicking over the sharp fangs in his mouth as he tipped his head so the heat of his words brushed against her lips. 

"You won't be needing those clothes."

**

“EXCUSE ME?!!”

Nene felt her pulse stutter and pick up double-time as the demon leaned closer, claws pricking at the soft curve of her cheeks as her whole body burned from his implications. She tried to push away, tried to get as much space between her and the demon before her; he wasn’t having it. The hand on her arm slid around her waist, pinning her tight against his chest as he smirked. 

“Oh yes, my sweet little Angel; that uniform just has to go.”

She felt those claws curl into her sash and tug, and before she could even make a sound, before she could try and push herself away; he moved. His hand slid from her waist to cup her bottom and squeeze, and she shrieked as he hauled her up and over his shoulder. 

He spun on his heel, whistling as he headed deeper into the maze as she tried to get loose. Nene beat her fists against his back and kicked her legs, trying to ignore the sharp curve of his shoulder as it pressed into her belly.

Harder to ignore was the hand hooked around her knees, and the thumb that was making tiny circles against her thigh. Worse than that though, was the hand still on her butt. She struggled harder, flushing as he patted the soft curve of her cheeks. 

 "PUT ME DOWN! AND DONT TOUCH ME!"

Nene let out a sound somewhere between a whimper and a scream as the demon chucked, pinching her as he nipped at her hip through the fabric of her dress.

"My my, aren't you a feisty one! You'll be great fun. I can already tell. But you have to behave, my Angel, or your new Master will punish you.

"And while I can guarantee you will not enjoy it, I shall have a delightful time."

She continued to struggle against him until the band around her finger began to burn. She yelped and folded, her chin bouncing into his back as she curled her hands together. 

It hurt, more than anything she had ever experienced. Like something was trying to claw at her soul, to tear her open and lay her bare. She watched through her tears as the demon's tail looped around her wrists, and as suddenly as the pain had come on, it vanished.

"Ah, fun little bit about that Bond, my Angel." 

She stiffened in his grasp as he drew a claw down her thigh before his fingers crept back up to pinch her.

"You cannot disobey me."

Cold stole through Nene's limbs and she went still and silent. The demon laughed, the echo of it reverberating through her own chest in a hollow imitation of joy. The tail squeezed her wrists, and she swallowed back her tears. 

Beneath them, the grassy maze gave way to cobblestones, and she planted her hands against the small of his back as he spun around. 

"Welcome to your new home, Angel."

Nene lifted her head, biting back a gasp at the palace before her; she had not expected something so elegant of a design in Hell. It rose from a tangle of wild roses like a crouching beast, sweeping up into the skyline like nothing she had seen. 

In Heaven, the buildings had been white, and gold and silver-toned. It had felt like walking through a dream, with open shutters and friendly hellos as she passed. This was quite the opposite. 

This was a nightmare of brick, wood, bone, and glass. Shadows hung from the twisted black iron of the balconies like discarded clothes, the stained glass depicting demons in different throes of lust. 

Ivy twisted it's way up the cracks of the black stones, twisting around marble statues carved in obscene positions. She averted her eyes as they passed a set of skeletons, entwined together, forever frozen in the moment of completion. 

And the arch of the grand doorway, before the demon carrying her turned on his heel to march her under it, was carved in stark white bone with the twisted limbs and slack faces of those who had given in to the Sin of Lust.

The inside was as hauntingly beautiful as the exterior, with dark walls and black marble floors. Golden lamps spilled light in fleeting puddles, and Nene saw more than one alcove with the entwined forms of sated bodies. 

He hauled her through the dining hall, whispers rising as the few demons who happened to be awake caught sight of them. Painted mouths disappeared behind razor-tipped nails as she knew they began to gossip, and more than one pair of hungry, hooded eyes raked over her form, leaving her feeling filthy. 

Nene tried to remember the twists and turns he took so she could attempt an escape, but when they passed the same low table with a couple half-concealed beneath it again, she knew he had purposely misled her.

Each path was more confusing than the last, some with high, vaulted ceilings that the light could not illuminate, and others with low curving beams that pulled the shadows close enough to touch. 

And the paintings! Nene could look nowhere and find a patch of wall that was not hung with obscenities. Even what she assumed were flowers, painted in soft brush strokes, resembled a part of her own anatomy that the demon's hand was much too close to.

He took them down a long hallway, the doors at the beginning doing little to conceal the moans and cries of the pleasure-seekers within. She flushed and tried to raise her hands to cover her ears to block out the sounds, but the tail held her fast. 

They turned again, and this hallway was silent but for the echo of his footsteps. His hand stroked from the curve of her waist to the back of her knee before he kicked a door open. 

Nene watched with increasing panic as the heavy wooden doors fell shut behind them, lock sliding into place as her heart sank. She was trapped, completely and utterly. 

She had no time to admire the room, richly decorated in swathes of black and red satin as the demon fisted his hand in the back of her dress and dumped her onto a bed.

It took her a second, as she was consumed by tangled scarlet silk and plush pillows as dark as a raven's wing, that she was not in just any bedroom, tumbled onto a sinfully soft bed. 

Nene was sprawled across the sheets in the bed that belonged to the Lord of Lust, locked in this den of depravity and debauchery. 

She watched with horror as he set a knee to the bed and dragged her closer, pinning her beneath his lithe form as she tried to get away, even though she knew it was useless. His mouth nipped at her throat, tongue sliding up her skin before he sucked a bruise into the tender flesh as he groaned. 

"You taste like innocence and divinity. And I am going to enjoy corrupting you."

He shoved her knees apart and settled against her, and before he could side his hand from her waist to her breast or between her legs, Nene threw her arms against his chest with a cry. 

She wasn't sure who was more surprised as he was tossed back, his black eyes lightening to amber as they both watched the pale gold band form around his tail. She scrambled from beneath him, not getting far before he hooked his hand around her chubby ankle. 

He didn’t draw her back to him, which she found odd, but he seemed more preoccupied with the sharp flicks he made to try and fling the ring off. The swing of it was rather hypnotic, and Nene gasped as his claws bit into her skin as he yanked her down the bed. 

She drew her knees up as he loomed over her, and she watched as his eyes flickered rapidly over her face, as if there was something hidden in her own gaze that would explain what had happened. His mouth split into a wicked smile and he hauled her up, locking one arm around her as she thrashed in his hold as he snapped his fingers. 

Seconds later, three scantily clad demonesses hurried through the door, all wearing the same outfit of a black and white maids uniform, and dipped into deep curtsies. Nene paled as he shoved her forward; the tallest demoness, who had ripped the front of her blouse so that her very generous bust could be seen through the heart shape, caught her by the arm before she could hit the floor. 

“Dress our little Angel in her new uniform; she’ll be joining you in your duties starting today.”

Nene whipped her head around as another of the demoness’ hurried away, the ruffles of her dress barely touching the top of her thighs. He couldn’t really mean to put her in something so revealing, but the sly smile as their eyes met showed that he absolutely did. 

She shrieked as the demons pulled at her uniform, trying to bat their hands away to no avail. The taller one unsnapped the buttons on her collar as the other pulled her sash free, and she could do nothing as the third came back with her arms full of fabric. 

They stripped her quickly and efficiently, though their touch lingered on her skin like a burn. She clung to her thin shift as they tried to pull it off, even as they knocked her off balance to remove her sandals. They couldn’t take her shift, she’d be naked; no one had ever seen her naked. The demoness caught her hands in a bruising grip and bunched the fabric in her free hand.

“Let her keep it.”

They all froze, turning to the Demon Lord reclining on his bed. His grin was as filthy as it was seductive, and Nene tried to draw her hands down to cover herself as his eyes raked over her, his tail flicking lazily against his thigh. She may as well have been completely bare before him with the way his gaze smoldered. 

“Yes, M’Lord.”

She didn’t struggle as they pulled the fabric over her head and harshly tugged her braids free of the collar, didn’t comment as they shoved her into the neat black shoes, muffled a gasp as they tied the bow of her apron with enough force to nearly drive the air from her lungs.

The demons hurried out as he snapped his fingers, one poking back in briefly to drop a mop, broom, and bucket inside the door with a cruel grin before it closed behind her. Nene kept her eyes shut as he crossed the room and curled his hands around her hips. 

There was nothing she could do as he twisted her from side to side and then turned her, trailing his claws across her belly as he pressed his face into her hair. She could feel the curve of his smile against the shell of her ear before he pulled away.

“You might as well look, my little Angel. You’ll be seeing yourself in it for the foreseeable future. Unless you’d like to clean in the nude.”

Nene snapped her eyes open as heat flooded her cheeks, and was surprised to find herself in a uniform that, while still inappropriate, covered much more than she was expecting. The puffed black sleeves left her arms bare, and the dark ruffles of her skirt at least came to her knees. It was actually cute, with the frilled overskirt and pink and white heart over her chest. 

“By the grace of providence we had one in your size.”

She glared at him as he chuckled as he floated behind her, magicing the bucket, mop, and broom into her hands. Providence, as if; more like limitless lechery, she thought as he adjusted her headband. She truly was stuck here, this wasn’t just an elaborate nightmare. 

Nene jumped with a scream as his hand smacked her bottom, cleaning supplies flying as he caught her up in his arms. That damned tail wound around her leg as if it had a mind of its own as he pinned her hands to his chest so he could twirl the ring around her finger. 

“And, my little Angel; a few more things.”

He bent her nearly backward as he slid his knee between her own, the tension in her spine the only thing keeping her from sprawling back over the bed. The ring on her finger seemed to burn with the same intensity as the one tapping against her thigh.

“You will be my personal attendant; you will wake me, bring me meals if I do not dine in the hall. When I do dine in the hall, you shall serve me. Ah ah, I’m not finished,” his finger pressed against her lips to silence her protests, “You will help me bathe, and dress, and cater to any of my whims.”

His hand slid down her back to cup her bottom and bring her hips flush to his. The hard lines of his body settled against the soft curves of her own with a familiarity that made her flush. 

“And I shall allow you to keep your innocence; for now.”

The press of him to the intimate place between her thighs made her whimper and tremble, and he only smirked. 

“Also, you shall address me as “My Lord” or “Master” when you speak to me; is that clear, my Angel?”

Nene dipped her head and mumbled as he shifted against her, his tail tightening around her thigh like a demonic garter. 

“I didn’t hear you, Angel.”

She lifted her head, meeting those blazing eyes with her own as she curled her nails into his chest and watched him wince. 

“Yes, Master.”

He dipped his head, mouth a breath from hers as he pressed their bodies closer together. Heat flooded her at every point they met, and she let her eyes flicker down to his lips worriedly.

“Good girl.”

And then he was gone. 

Nene sank onto the edge of the bed as he swept his hand out and the cleaning supplies disappeared with the spilled water. He pulled open the door of his room and gestured into the hall.

“Come along, unless you wish for me to take you now.”

She shot up from the bed and hurried to the entrance, shuttering as he laid his hand on the small of her back to guide her. 

“You have much to see before you help me tonight, and I don’t tolerate tardiness.”

Nene felt despair sink into her soul as he led her back down those twisting halls. There were more demons now, peeking from doorways and corners as they headed to the servants quarters. Eyes followed her every step, and the whispers hung in the air like a death sentence. 

The Lord of Lust had an Angel for a plaything, and wouldn’t he have fun with her? 

Her master’s hand slid lower as his tail lashed against her with every step, and she bit back her tears. This was her own fault, she had gotten herself into this mess. And she would have to be the one to get herself out. There would be no Divine Intervention to save her; the Angels did not listen to the cries that rose from Hell. 

If Nene wanted to escape, she’d have to do it herself.

And @anubis-005 Thank you SOOO much for this again! It is, as always, an honor and pleasure to work with you!!! <3 :3

[hufflautia]

The Boyfriend

Dedicated to the anon who came up w this idea and to @eatacrackerandstop <3. There's a small Shadow and Bone reference; if you find it, you get a high five✨

Summary: Slytherin and Hufflepuff meet their daughter’s boyfriend for the first time, and Slytherin has a few concerns.

~

Hufflepuff closes the door behind her daughter, who stepped out to privately wish her boyfriend goodbye on the front stoop, and turns to Slytherin.

“He seems like a sweet kid,” she smiles. Slytherin follows her into the kitchen with a disgruntled expression. He leans against the countertop as she begins washing the dishes.

“What’s taking her so long,” he eyes the door. “It only takes a couple of seconds to say goodbye to someone.”

“They spent the entire night with us. They probably just want a little alone time,” Hufflepuff replies. She glances at him when he sighs and crosses his arms. “Do I sense a little disdain for our daughter’s boyfriend?”

Slytherin scowls.

“I don’t like him,” he states plainly. “He gives me...bad boy vibes.” His scowl deepens when she laughs incredulously.

“Bad boy vibes?”

“Yes,” he says indignantly. “Bad boy vibes! Did you see his smirk when she laughed at his joke?"

"You smirk a lot,” she points out, to which he grudgingly admits. “Besides, is it bad that he can make her laugh?"

"'Course not," he huffs. "But did you see how he put his arms around her?”

"I'm pretty sure that's called a hug, honey."

Slytherin steps between her and the sink. She shoots him a look as water drips on the floor.

“Please get out of my way, Slytherin. You’re acting like a child.”

He takes her hands into his own, not caring that they’re wet. “Honey, you’re not listening to me.”

“I am! I just don’t agree with you.” She continues before Slytherin can object. “You’re worrying over nothing. Our daughter is old enough to make her own decisions on who she hangs out with and what she does with her time."

“She’s only in her seventh year—”

“Slytherin," she says sternly. “Our baby is grown now, believe it or not. I trust her judgment. You should too.”

His brows furrow, and he doesn’t respond right away.

"It's not that I don't trust her," he finally says. "I just don't want her to get hurt."

Hufflepuff softens in this rare moment of vulnerability—his grumpiness and frustration often mask his fears.

"We can't control what happens," she says gently. "We can't control who does what or who hurts who. But what we can control is what we do and how we act." Slytherin remains silent as he considers her words. "I think the best thing we can do is support our daughter. And if things don't end well in their relationship, she will know who to come to: the people who have always been there for her."

Her words sink in, and Slytherin nods.

"You're right."

"'Course I'm right."

He smiles somberly. "I’ve only ever wanted to protect her."

"You will," she assures, pulling him into an embrace. "But you will do so at a healthy and reasonable distance. No threatening the boy."

Slytherin snorts and says, "I'm not that type of dad." He rests his chin on top of her head. "But if he breaks her heart, I keep no promises."

"Good," she murmurs into his shirt. “I'll be right behind you.”

Their moment of peace is interrupted by the sound of the front door opening and closing. They see their daughter, Giselle, standing by the doorway with a flushed grin.

"Hey kiddo," Slytherin smiles.

She makes a face. “I'm 18, Dad. I'm not a kid anymore."

"Alright." Hufflepuff notices a familiar gleam in his eye and tries not to smile as he continues. "Do you prefer muffin? Sweet pea? Or perhaps cupcake—"

Giselle covers her ears. "Dad!" she groans. "Eat a cracker and stop."

He holds his hands up in defeat as he chuckles. "Okay, okay."

"So," Hufflepuff says once things settle down. "What did Dorian think? Did he like us? What about the food? Was my cooking okay?" A look of horror washes over her face. "Oh shoot, should we have given him some leftovers to take back to his family? He probably didn't get too far, I'll go get the food from the fridge and—"

"Honey," Slytherin laughs, resting his hand on the small of her back before she can scurry off in search of tin foil and plastic containers. "It's fine."

"Yeah," Giselle assures. "The food was great, and he loved meeting you guys."

"And we loved meeting him,” Hufflepuff says warmly. “Tell Dorian he's welcome to come back at any time."

"Okay," she grins. "Can we start our movie night now?"

Slytherin nods. "I believe it's Mom's turn to choose the movie."

"I know exactly what we should watch tonight," Hufflepuff beams. They pile onto the couch, and when she puts the disc into the DVD player, everyone but Hufflepuff's face falls when they see the title.

"Aw, not this movie," Giselle complains. "We watched the trailer last week, and you said it yourself that it looked like trash."

"Wha—I didn't say trash!"

"I think you did," Slytherin interjects. He stifles a laugh when she shoots him a look.

Hufflepuff purses her lips. "Ravenclaw and I watched it at the movie theaters a few days ago, and it was a cinematic masterpiece!"

He arches an eyebrow. "So you're gonna watch it again?"

"Yes! Because it’s that good. And I want you guys to watch it with me. The movie has adventure and plot twists and romance—I mean, what hurts more than a broken heart?"

"A severed head," Giselle replies, to which Slytherin snorts a laugh.

Hufflepuff scoffs and shakes her head, but a smile tugs at her lips. “You’ll see what I’m talking about after we watch it, but I need to use the bathroom first. I’ll bring back some popcorn.”

“Can you also get some Sprite?” Giselle calls after her.

“Okay.” Hufflepuff lingers by the doorway. “Do you want anything, sweetie pie?” she says to Slytherin.

“No thanks, snuggle bunny.” He snickers when Giselle visibly cringes. He and Hufflepuff liked to call each other outrageously sweet pet names in front of their daughter for the sole purpose of grossing her out.

“Yes,” Giselle says in a deadpan voice. “This is the exact spot I want to be in right now.”

Hufflepuff laughs and winks at Slytherin before leaving. He watches her walk away before whispering to Giselle, “How likely is it that she’ll accidentally trap herself in the bathroom and we get to pick another movie?”

“Extremely likely,” she replies. “If we put a rubber item underneath the door to act as a door stopper, she won’t be able to open it from the inside…” Slytherin is looking at her weirdly, and she swallows her words. “...I mean, I don’t know.”

Slytherin smiles but doesn’t say anything. Giselle may have inherited her mother’s looks, but she has her father’s mischief.

While they wait for Hufflepuff, Slytherin speaks. “Can I ask you something personal?”

“Sure,” she says cautiously.

“Do you love him?”

Her eyebrows rise—she didn’t expect this question. She takes a moment to think.

"Not yet.”

He nods. "But you're happy?"

"I am," she smiles.

His eyes crinkle. If she was happy…well, that was good enough for him.

“I’m glad, kiddo.”

This time, Giselle doesn’t roll her eyes at the term of endearment. Instead, she takes his hand and squeezes it three times. Slytherin, who taught her the gesture, squeezes her hand four times in response.

“Who’s ready to start the movie?” Hufflepuff walks in with popcorn and sprite, unaware of the father-daughter moment she just missed.

“As ready as I’ll ever be,” Slytherin sighs, scooting over to make space for her. She plops down beside him and settles the bowl between them.

“Oh,” she perks up. “Before I forget. Accio tissue boxes!”

Slytherin looks bewildered as tissue boxes come flying their way. “Do we really need tissues?”

“Absolutely,” she scatters the boxes over their laps. Slytherin raises an eyebrow and glances over at Giselle, who also looks perplexed.

“My teen angst bullshit is about to have a body count,” she whispers as the movie begins playing.

A/N: This fic is somewhat connected to Different Love Languages, another one of my fics. Is the slytherpuff couple in that fic the same couple in this one? That's up to you, dear reader😌

I lowkey hate the title, but I couldn't come up w a better one. Also, this fic was longer than I planned. I originally decided to write something like this:

“Why don’t you like him?”

“Because I used to be a bad boy, which is exactly why I don’t trust him.”

Basic dialogue, plain and simple. But the darling anon who told me their idea deserves a full-length story <3

Let me know what you thought of this one-shot. Feedback makes me happy <3 If you prefer to stay anonymous, the anon option for asks is available! Be safe and well, everyone.

Tag lists are open✨ Let me know via ask/messages/comments if you want to be added or removed.

@slytherpuff-shenanigans @axieleration @sunnniiee @just--another--bean @determinedpines @zenobiagrace @asterinflower @cinnamon-roll-unicorn @mossy-axolotl @dumbbitch11 @hitchhiker-of-the-galaxy @notsowiseravenclaw @arianatorpotterhead @eatacrackerandstop @luciferswife16 @walkinganomaly @asunshinepuff @lewispoolerpayton @adreameratdawn @thewitcheswords @oncergleekpotterhead @princessstoopid @stardustzainy @flvrqnce @multi-fandom-nutjob @eunnieah @iamahufflepuff @1hufflepuff @introvertedrae @princessstoopid @jasminedayz @magnoliamermaid @HOPEFUL-HUFFLEPUFF-PEEVES @peanut-in-the-goal @pufflehuff929 @sophiexteresa @da-fox-rangerrr @dawinehouse @shipping-book-keeper @xxavaloraxx @silverhetdanes @im-a-solanum-lycopersicum @elegantcroissantplaidpony @theoriginaljohnwatsonsblog @theoriginalsherlockholmesblog @vickeyunicorn @arianatorpotterhead @hmilkwhoney @simpering-simpleton @grandcyclecreation @sweetinvisiblewriter @marvelenthusiast10 @mvlpksvthisht @qiaopa @beardedhumanoid @jadefox05 @justanotherperson @inkedintothepaper @minty-malfoy @trippy-morgan @fangirlgeekandfreak @boilyourteeth @absentmindeduniverse @colettedelaurel @halfelven1 @happy-puff @coloring-bud @in-love-with-remus-lupin @autumnpleaves @crakencc @flyme--tothemoon @hedgepuffgirl @littleemotionalpanda @pancakes-and-sugar @korra4321 @aquietkindofthunder @qixnsriess @porksoba @thatfann @hellounicorn @i-have-a-bad-feeling @aasa2102 @zuko-28 @annie-mcl @clementines-x @writtenfoxscreams @randomwriter23 @cryingabtwandavision @coolninjavoid @urfaveslytherin @malfoys-demigod @tumlbr-trasher @violayaxley @wolfpack-arts-industries99 @zainieees-stuff @blueberry-9-pancakes @stressy-depressy @royalelusts

[gem-rewatch]

SU rewatch- S1E11- Arcade Mania

Hey, long time no see!

I’m desperately bored in solitary quarantine at university right now, and decided to try and pick this SU rewatch series up again for fun. It’s been a while since I’ve watched through the show in order. Plus, now that this show is completely finished, there’s plenty more connections to make. I can’t promise I’ll be consistent with this, but at the very least I can have fun trying to make a few more posts at my leisure.

Anyways. With that business out of the way. Let’s get right on to the show!

We begin with yet another mission Steven’s guardians have brought him along on! I believe this is the fifth mission we know of that he’s accompanied them on so far. (Lunar Sea Spire, Inverted Pyramid, the unknown mission he returns from in Tiger Millionaire, the desert, and now this one.) It’s really sweet seeing the Gems begin to trust him tagging along more often. There will come a day in the near future where missions become routine for Steven, but in these early episodes, you can really tell that each and every one is a brand new adventure.

In terms of plot, though, this episode is honestly Future Vision: The Prequel.

We learn a lot about Garnet’s abilities and her role in the team here, even if all of these details aren’t spelled out word-for-word quite yet. Hints towards her future vision we see this ep include:

Garnet moving ahead of the group to be in the perfect spot to catch Steven when he falls.

Her flawless moves while fighting and dodging the monsters.

Her becoming a master at the rhythm game later in the episode.

Like, damn. Look at this.

Look at her go.

My Q U E E N!

I had to gif all of this just because it’s such a beautiful and smooth sequence of animation.

If there’s one thing all of the Crystal Gems can 100% agree on, it’s that Garnet is friggin’ amazing.

Garnet: “Let them go. They’re just parasites. If they want to be a problem, they’ll have to answer to me.”

So, does this statement mean that- at this present moment- her extended stay at the arcade was entirely beyond her future vision? That the only futures she saw were ones where she was actually present to deal with containment of the Gem parasites? Given that later scenes insinuate she’d never been to the arcade before, and would have no “data” about its games to factor into her internal understanding of the world, this seems likely.

I adore the gradual palette change here, from shadow, to setting sun. It’s a nice detail that adds so much more life to what could otherwise be a rather mundane transition scene. It seems like unique palettes were more common in early SU- I wonder why Crewniverse stopped implementing these as often later on?

Pearl, entering the arcade: “Humans find such fascinating ways to waste their time.”

Thanks, Pearl. Love you too. <3

This sequence of Pearl failing at playing a car chase/road rage game hits so much different knowing what happens in Last One Out of Beach City. It’s genuinely radical how far she grows in confidence from this point, because here, she seems so shackled to rules and guidelines. Now that we know about her rebellious past, it might be tempting to write this characterization off as “early series weirdness,” but... I don’t think that’s what’s happening here.

Instead, I wonder if she’s working through grief-related regression.

Think about it... the pain of Rose’s passing is still so fresh for her. She was a rule breaking rebel once, yes, but she spent all of those days at Rose’s side. And I get the sense that she’s poured so much of herself into keeping Rose safe, into the rebellion against Homeworld, that without those, she’s caught in a vacuum. What IS her purpose now, when the very person she rebelled for is gone?

So she slips back into old pearl-like habits. Chronic rule following, and a fear of deviating from norms. How familiar. Thankfully, much of her arc throughout the show is her directly growing beyond these habits to live boldly as her own Gem.

The friggin video game when Garnet knocks its head off: “TELL MY WIFE I’M SORRYYY!!!”

Yo, what the fuck. This line is both hilarious and messed up, all at once. Please tell me the game isn’t sentient.

Aaaand here we finally introduce Garnet to the video game sensation that is Meat Beat Mania! This game is perfectly suited to her and her power of foresight because its patterns are algorithmic and not vulnerable to spontaneous deviations, and thus easy to predict, with enough input. She’s probably getting a quick rush of satisfaction with every correct move, and she barely has to exert any energy with her future vision to get that rush. After years and years of wading through endless possibility at every avenue, this video game’s patterns must be a rejuvenating breath of fresh air.

It’s addicting.

...Kinda makes me think of how I get sometimes when I play solitaire on my phone for an hour straight. After a while, I barely even think, I’m just shuffling through my deck and moving cards almost on automatic. I don’t have to use much energy to play, and it gives me animated fireworks every time I finish a match. It’s a win-win.

Amethyst: “I’MMA WIN AN AIRPLANE!”

I don’t know what it is about the way Michaela Dietz says the world “airplane,” but this makes me laugh every time. Does... does she think she can win a genuine airplane here because she saw Onion win a tiny motorbike from the ticket booth?? Amethyst, oh my god. XD

She’s got the spirit, this wild child.

So, moving on- we meet up with our crew later the next morning, Garnet nowhere to be seen. There’s an interesting exchange I’d like to highlight real quick-

Pearl: “If we’re supposed to fight a giant foot, Garnet would let us know.” Amethyst: “Yeah, Garnet’s the boss!” Pearl: “Well, we’re all a team. Garnet just has heightened perception that guides us towards our mission objectives.”

Considering the specific phrasing Pearl uses here- “heightened perception” instead of “future vision-” did Garnet outright tell the two of them to not explain her powers, just like she told them not to mention she’s a fusion? Because I’m pretty sure no one ever uses the phrase “heightened perception” again in reference to her powers.

Given the fact that Garnet chose to keep the knowledge of Ruby and Sapphire under the table until she felt Steven could understand her better, my guess is that this is a similar scenario.

Ahah, I genuinely can’t tell if this is Steven being gullible, or just impulsively playing along with Amethyst’s antics. Still- gross, kid. Don’t wipe your wet cereal face on your shirt! Ew! :O

When he goes outside and starts to use a kiddy metal detector to scan for quarters... so THAT’S where he finds his arcade money! Because I can’t imagine Greg is financially able to give him that much to spend on non-essentials at this point in the show.

Okay, so... I just want to bring light to the fact that Garnet has literally been in this arcade ALL NIGHT LONG.

It was evening when she first arrived here- the sun was visibly setting in the background, and when Steven, Amethyst, and Pearl left, the sky was dark. But now it’s morning. Steven was just seen eating breakfast. And Garnet is STILL HERE.

Does this mean Mr. Smiley locked her IN? I have so many questions... Did he try to get her to leave, only to be intimidated by her complete lack of response? I would kill to know more about this interaction. Poor Mr. Smiley. That man deals with so much bullshit in this town, huh?

Geebus, is Garnet a solid wall. Previous episodes have shown Steven forcibly shoving whole tons of food, and swinging a mini-freezer over his head, and yet he can’t get her to budge even an inch.

I absolutely adore how he climbs up her frame like a koala, though, ahah. Cute.

Meat Beat Mania announcer: “That’s rare!!” Steven: “Oh my gosh...!”

I take these two lines as evidence that this is the first time Steven’s ever seen Garnet’s eyes. Specifically, the fact that there’s three of them. Which, makes sense- since Garnet is still really reserved emotionally at this point, and is only begins to get in the habit of taking her visor off to show Steven her full face later on in the show.

This expression deeply hurts me.

Steven’s so distraught here- because the others are in danger, the town is in danger, and he doesn’t have his trusty, dependable guardian who catches him when he falls and beats up scary monsters for him. Without her, the whole team is vulnerable and blind.

He feels alone. He feels... powerless.

And so he responds to that confusing, powerless feeling by trying to compensate with his own power. When all other routes he can think of fail, he smashes the video game console.

It... uh, it works... but once again, Steven entirely fails to consider the consequences, huh? He experienced a little bit of character growth in this regard in the episode Serious Steven, but even past that it’ll remain an recurring issue for him. Hell, his impulsiveness is a general character flaw even stretching into SUF.

In summary, though:

Poor Mr. Smiley. He works so hard, and doesn’t deserve this BS. ;-;

[boop-le-snoot]

PARTY FAVOURS | CHAPTER 2

Rating: Explicit. 18+

‼️TW: Reader is EIGHTEEN! Recreational drug use, smoking and alcohol consumption, deeply internalised self-loathing, very questionable moral standards. Daddy kink taken half-seriously. BDSM themes in later chapters - explicit content will come with it’s own TWs. FIRST PERSON POV.

Summary: You’re Peter’s classmate, a child of rich and famous but uncaring parents. Getting paired up for a lengthy project with the boy was an interesting turn of events and you don’t know whether to feel blessed or cursed when you develop, seemingly, a perfectly normal, harmless crush on Tony Stark. Fueled by feelings of inadequacy and boredom, your life spirals out of control - and you’re lucky your newfound friends are there to pick up the pieces even if you cannot find it in yourself to believe these amazing human (and not so human) beings voluntarily give you more than a fleeting glance and an offhanded thought. And they brought cake!

A/N: Bad girls are sad girls! Always wondered what goes through the mind of a spoiled, rich but intelligent and perceptive teenager? Have you found yourself craving that adrenaline rush, the danger of a forbidden fruit? Okay. That was cheesy as hell. Gross.

Let’s try again. Sarcasm? Check. Vine references? Hell yes! Crude humour? Check. Blunt honesty? Double check. We’re living in a Lana del Rey song, ladies.

The author doesn’t actually condone codependent relationships in real life. This is a filthy little fantasy. Enjoy, deviants.

THE TAG LIST IS NOW OPEN! @vozit​ @another-stark-sub ​ @mostly-marvel-musings​

Beta read by the lovely and patient @miscmarvelwritings  ! She deserves all the love 💙

Peter woke me up at eight AM the next morning like the little shit that he was, demanding I make him pancakes. It wasn’t the first time I’ve had the joy to experience him in the morning and he knew exactly how to antagonise me enough to make him the special pancakes he liked so much. They had become kind of a ritual whenever he stayed over at my house, which was quite often - teachers liked me enough to pair me up with one of the most sensible kids for any projects that couldn’t be done alone by yours truly on her own.

I put on my yesterday’s dress, applied moisturizer and obediently trotted behind an excitedly mumbling Peter. The kitchen was large, beautiful and delightfully empty of any resident superheroes. I’ve indirectly crossed paths with all of the tower’s residents hanging around Tony, but I’ve yet had to speak more than polite niceties to any of them. 

Spying a bowl of boiled eggs and some sort of weird salad alongside half burned toast on the counter, I suddenly understood why Peter demanded his pancakes. I strictly instructed the disaster child to stay away from my cooking process and set to work with one ear listening to his ramblings and a headphone in the other. 

A set of thumping footsteps appeared behind me as I was pouring the batter for the first pancake. Their owner loudly sat down next to Peter, sighing, groaning, generally making “I’m not a morning person” sounds.

“Good morning, Mr. Barnes,” Peter’s tone was way, way too chipper.

“‘mrng,” The Sergeant grumbled. “Who’s this and why is she making pancakes?”

I turned around, spatula at the ready. “It’s me,” We’ve actually met before, but Barnes had left before I could even come over from my side of the work bench to say hello.

He nodded in acknowledgement after giving me a suspicious once-over. “One of Stark’s science children. I’m James but you can call me Bucky,” His voice sounded rough and gravely, and he clutched a coffee cup half the size of my head.

I snorted. “Science child, sure,” It wasn’t half-bad actually. I wisely choose to ignore the part of being Tony’s. No matter how hot the man was, I wasn’t anybody’s but my own, thank you very much. “Go get the bananas, Nutella and maple syrup, fellow science child.”

Peter scrambled to follow instructions as I plated the pancakes and cut the bananas into neat little rings to fill the sweet circles with. A tablespoon of Nutella, half a sliced banana, wrap, garnish with powdered sugar and pour maple syrup generously on top. I really didn’t see how this could be difficult but any and all attempts to teach Peter how to recreate my masterpiece always ended up in an absolute mess. I turned around to ask Bucky if he wanted any. The look of a man starved answered all my questions.

“You’re a goddess,” Peter moaned around his mouthful, nose smudged white with the powdered sugar.

“Gross, chew first then talk, you neanderthal,” I scoffed, prepping more batter for the second batch of pancakes. I wasn’t sure if everybody would show up but figured it would be rude to exclude them from the sheer magnificence that were my pancakes. I was just that good.

The music in my ear drowned most of Peter’s disgusting chewing noises, thankfully. My second batch vanished into thin air, inhaled by the two males like the garbage disposals that they were. Peter, in particular, ate an alarming quantity of food and I was surprised how he managed to stay so skinny. His daily eating schedule resembled the Hobbits.

More people appeared, this time acting less surprised regarding me standing at the stove. Hawkeye, Black Widow, Scarlet Witch and her brother, all of them wandered in wearing sleep attire with various amusing prints. Thankfully, they mostly kept quiet or chatted with Peter - I would have definitely grumbled if someone tried to talk to me. As far as my body was concerned it was still the middle of the night.

“PANCAKES,” A booming voice announced and I shuddered at the sheer intensity and devotion contained in that one word. Thor.

“Please use your indoor voice,” I snapped reflectively. My brain caught up with what I just did so I hastily backtracked. “Sorry, I’m a bitch in the mornings.”

The blonde man chuckled, coming over to poke his nose into my flurry of pour-flip-fill sequence. Then, with all the grace and manners of a prince, he dipped one (1) large finger into the jar of Nutella and wandered off with it stuck in his mouth. With this turn of events the Nutella was bound to run out sooner than expected.

I turned around, annoyed confusion in plain sight. “The fuck?.. That’s gross, don’t do that,” Finding his brother (adopted!) sitting next to Thor, wearing a haughty smirk, finger still in his mouth. So Loki turned into his brother to steal Nutella from a jar. I sighed. Nobody even batted an eye. “Your alien germs are in there now, double ew.”

“Alien germs? Where?” Bruce entered the kitchen with a tablet under his arm, wearing Hulk themed pajamas, Captain America in tow. I was honestly on the verge of breaking down into hysterical laughter. Domestic Avengers wasn’t something I’d expected to see or experience, ever, much less be a part of. It took a moment for me to remind myself that they were people, too, and each of them was entitled to their own quirks. 

“America, egg-splain,” Peter muttered under his breath, giggling. “Loki stuck his hand in the Nutella jar,” He pointed at said jar. “She got grumpy,” Peter pointed at me. “Don’t make her grumpy, please, I want more pancakes,” And turned his pleading puppy eyes in my direction again.

“This is indentured servitude,” I pointed my spatula at the little shit. “You just had, like, ten.” But I made more batter nonetheless. I must admit it was kind of cool, seeing the earth’s mightiest defenders so relaxed. And Pete being happy, that was just… The best. I don’t know how to explain it. His eternal cheerfulness was highly contagious.

Chuckles filled up the room, the adults chatting and bickering amongst themselves while they patiently waited for their own breakfast. 

“Do you need some help?” Bruce approached me after stopping to fetch himself a cup of tea. It smelled strongly of tangy herbs and honey.

“I need more Nutella and bananas,” I admitted, surveying the sheer amount of people I had to feed. I didn’t doubt the Captain and two Asgardians had an appetite to match Peter’s which meant a literal extra set of condiments was required. Thankfully, Bruce fetched them for me, coming to a stop next to me. “Anything else?”

“You know, I tried making these with Peter and he just ended up with powdered sugar and chocolate all over himself,” I mused, noting the way Banner was carefully observing the assembly of a pancake. “You think Doctor seven-phds can manage to add a few toppings to a pancake without causing a disaster?“ 

Bruce rolled his eyes fondly, bumping me with his hip. "I’m no Clint Barton when it comes to cooking but at least I don’t burn my toast like Steve,” True to his word, his hands made swift motions of filling, wrapping and plating each individual pancake. They were almost as good as mine albeit more messy. I had lots of practice though. We finished off a batch in companionable silence, sounds of the team and my music playing in the background. 

I didn’t notice when I started swaying to the rhythm, catching a confused look from Bruce. I brushed back my hair, revealing a wireless headphone in my ear and he chuckled in understanding. “What are you listening to?”

“Right now? Kings of Leon,” I said, leaning towards him so he could hear the chorus “Use Somebody” currently occupying my right ear. 

“I like them, too,” He said, his cheek gently touching mine. His hands slowed on the pancake, a soft hum vaguely reminding me of the song’s melody emanating from his throat. “What else do you usually listen to?”

“Mostly heavier stuff, but I have a whole separate playlist dedicated to mid-2000s bops,” I answered. “I’ve heard I’m quite old school when it comes to music.”

“Well, I am an old man, so…” Bruce grinned mischievously. “But my guilty pleasure is Lady Gaga,” He admitted with a laugh.

I laughed, too. The image of his dancing in his lab to Born This Way was too much for my brain and I hung my head, fighting giggles. Bruce bumped me with his hip again, faking a pout. “Okay, okay, that was a fucking hilarious image, you go dude,” I finally powered through my struggle to contain laughter. “My own guilty pleasure would be… Umm… Lana Del Rey, I guess.”

Bruce made a vague noise of confusion. I took a brief break from mixing the batter to dig out my second headphone, presenting it to him and switching to a song. “This is what makes us girls”. Despite the fact I have never stolen a car or had a close female friend, the nostalgia was real. “Carmen” followed after the first song and I silently thanked whatever deity that “You can be the boss” was taken out of Spotify - I don’t think I was prepared to share that kind of information with a lab partner. An older, handsome lab partner. Wait… Where did that come from?

“I like it,” He said after the song ended and my more usual stuff began playing. “It suits you, I think.”

I groaned. “Really? I think it’s edgy,” Hiding away the embarrassment, I passed him a tray of freshly baked pancakes, occupying his immediate attention.

“You’re an old soul,” He gave me a lopsided smile. I saw a very faint blush tinting his cheeks, the kind of blush that had me wondering about the meaning behind his words. 

I gave an attempt at a smile in response, the left corner of my mouth barely tilting up. We talked some more about the rock music we shared in our earphones. I had a lot of 80s hair metal and 90s grunge in my playlist. Bruce was not a Curt Cobain man but enjoyed the works of his legacy, Marcy Playground. 

A tan hand wormed its way between me and Bruce, snatching a handful of banana slices and disappeared just as swiftly. “Tonyyy,” Bruce groaned, picking up another banana to replace the stolen pieces.

The spatula in my hand became a weapon as I blindly aimed at the target behind my back. A loud “ow” indicated I hit it. When I turned around, Tony was clutching the side of his face, a hurt look in his eyes and cheeks stuffed full of stolen goods. I stared him square in the face, absolutely refusing to acknowledge the fact that he was shirtless - the arc reactor glowed brightly in the middle of his toned chest. Fuck.

His chest was honestly what I was aiming for. I constantly kept forgetting how short he actually was. There was this one time when Tony had to put his arms around me to steady a piece of tech - he felt huge, hard and enormous around me. 

“What’s that for, Princess?” He finally chewed through his food and found his voice.

“For being a Tony,” I retorted. “Stay away from my workspace and wait for your breakfast like everybody else.”

“Hey! This is my kitchen,” He whined immediately, like the adult man that he was. I nearly cried from how adorable his face became, eyebrows scrunched up. “I don’t want to wait! And why does he,” Tony’s finger accusingly pointed at Bruce, “Get the bananas?!”

“Because he’s Brucie-bear,” I stuck my nose up in the air when Bruce’s arm wrapped around my waist. “He’s my science father,” I stuck my tongue out at Tony, seeing Bruce’s triumphant smile. Banner used every opportunity to get back at Tony’s incessant sass. 

The gleaming in Tony’s eyes should have alarmed me. “But he’s not your science daddy,” Tony’s flirting was accompanied by a salacious eyebrow wiggle and Peter’s screech of “OH MY GOD!" 

It took me every ounce of willpower to not flush. It was one of those rare times that I was at a complete loss of words. Thinking on the spot, I gave a very meaningful look to Bruce - thankfully, he got the gist and returned an equally filthy smirk back. Tony gaped.

"Is this how they are in the lab?” The Captain’s quiet voice leaked horrified amusement.

“All.The.Time.” Peter’s resonating groan was followed by Romanoff’s laughter.

We went up to the lab after breakfast. Thankfully Tony stopped his dramatic bitching when I served him my pancakes, scarfing them down much like everybody else. So me and Pete were accompanied by one (1) happy engineer, all three of us tinkering away on a robot that we were supposed to present in our science class in a month. The focus that was required to solder was immense and our usual banter was missing, replaced by an occasional request for a specific tool or a water bottle.

It took a few hours to get the dirty job done even with Tony’s help (technically he wasn’t supposed to but neither me nor Pete had the heart to forbid him from it when the man looked so content and happy soldering away). By the time I uncurled from my spot on the bench, my back was in knots and my dress had oil stains and holes all over it. I immediately went to the nearest water bottle, finishing half of it in seconds, picking up my phone to see if I had any important messages from my mother.

None.

Just a message from Bruce.

I tapped on my phone, idly scrolling through the Instagram app, liking some pictures of people I barely knew and keeping up a general appearance of being very busy. When the ringtone started playing, it took me a whole five seconds to understand it was, in fact, coming from my phone - I certainly wouldn’t put something so… Outrageous as my main tone.

Banner had discovered the power of the internet. You Can Be The Boss played loudly, and it played from my phone and Bruce was calling me. I picked it up, turning around, fighting the incoming laughter. “Yes, Brucie?" 

To say that Tony’s and Peter’s faces were scandalised was nothing. The boy’s face was such a deep shade of red, I started worrying about his blood pressure and Tony’s mouth hung open limply, like he was witnessing the second coming of Christ. 

"Is Tony sufficiently traumatized?” Judging by the breathless tone of his voice, Banner was resisting a mighty laughing fit of his own.

“Oh, absolutely,” I happily chirped.

“Good, keep it up. Come to my lab before you leave,” Banner snorted and then, realising what he’d done, promptly hung up, the tell-tale beginning of a giggle fit abruptly interrupted by a dial tone.

I put the phone in my bag, gathering the rest of my things with a look somewhere between innocence and indifference. At least, I hoped it was - my mind kept jumping between the engineer’s ridiculously scandalised face and the way his mouth went slack, lips moist and soft and plush. That’s a very dangerous trail.

A very dangerous trail I couldn’t resist exploring in the solitude and privacy of my own bedroom, at home.

[frogtanii]

It’s wind anon! (Imagine me as the screeching seagull meme) just pushing through the week. Getting the test out of my mind—it just sucks because there’s always this one test that I completely mess up on—and as someone who has to deal with all honors classes and my grades tend to be good, every time I fail to meet up to expectations my stress skyrockets. (Imagine a world where grades don’t matter and school is learning based rather than mark based...) Family pressures too—okay, wind anon is done ranting.

The update! The drama—I was there the moment it updated and I saw the comments rush in and I was laughing real hard.

But my reaction to the update!

Osamu POV :0!!! The insecurity... “all it did was remind him that he was alone”— I empathize because gosh, that is so real.

The attachment to Meiko though... his emotional state is on a very unstable tightrope. “Osamu had Meiko and he used to have Daichi and Iwaizumi...” that entire section has all my red flags raised. He’s going to completely break when everything comes out.

The loud clang startled me though. I was like “!!!” But it was our YN! Our kind, wonderful YN!! Trying to get snacks wwwwww.

Osamu thinking YN is cute :0 I be having a lot of thoughts about that but him squishing it down is fair. He considers himself to be in a committed relationship (though Meiko does not reciprocate and I am ready to fight regarding that) but I can respect his devotion (even if it is very misguided).

But. “After all, you were the reason Atsumu hated him now and never spoke to him anymore.” My gosh. What do I even say about this? Because the blame is entirely thrown off. I mean, you mentioned before Atsumu had a specific reason for believing in you over Meiko so I’m still waiting for that but Osamu is thinking something wrong but it’s a human action. It’s so easy to blame people to make yourself feel better. And your brain can do it without you realizing the depths of what has been thought.

Osamu being angry (!!!) and being a complete utter douche. YN literally just wanted a bag of chips and you’re here, crowding them in the pantry and being hostile. I don’t have much to say about it because he realized his mistake but by then he already stressed YN really badly and I am...(long sigh).

Atsumu to the rescue. We appreciate Atsumu very very much in this house. It really sucks that Osamu and Atsumu are confronting like this—I mean, Atsumu has been fighting a bit and Osamu had not really been listening to Atsumu on his own end prior to this confrontation so I’m...exhausted and a bit sad in the “It can’t be helped” kind of way.

“Osamu allowed him to, too in shock and ashamed to protest, much less fight back.” It couldn’t be helped considering how everything developed but...it still hurts my chest a bit, y’know? And then Osamu tries to apologize and I’m ready (so so ready) for them to communicate because they desperately need to—

But then Meiko comes in (I am...ready to throw stuff at her. Lots of stuff. Packing peanuts. All squeaky and annoying and bad for the environment just like she is—or something like that, I dunno, I’m half dead because I’m dealing with cramps rn) and all my wishes for them to finally have that much needed conversation where Osamu can finally break down and cry—all my wishes are turned to ash like.

(Angry Wind anon noises)

Meiko rubbing her makeup all over Osamu’s shirt like he is a rag. What in the... And her 4 inch heels please, I cannot, why, I can’t deal with this, I can’t, don’t make me get close to her because I’m like Yachi (stressed out of my mind). Please don’t do this to me. But yeah, Meiko with her poor makeup that doesn’t stay on her face. What the heck....

And Meiko’s scent... gross. Like, brown sugar, cute, nice, baked goods do smell really nice, (ever add a bunch of vanilla extract to a recipe? It like, perfumes around everywhere, it’s insane and wonderful) but chances are (because it’s Meiko), it’s overbearingly sweet. Chinese food (I do not trust her taste in Chinese food to be frank), I happen to come from a Chinese family, I have Chinese food for dinner like everyday, it would take a lot to be able to get that sort of scent on you. And I do mean a lot. And hairspray??? Chemical? I do not,,, I,,, Osamu, why would you breathe that in? It’s gonna be real bad for your lungs? And we already know Meiko smokes as well—your lung health, please value it—

And then the Suna entrance. Wonderfully done fr0ggy!

Final thoughts, I am very much projecting onto Yachi rn. Yachi has been in the house for less than a week and she already has to deal with this. The company should give her a raise. My gosh.

Anyway, might as well do a thoughts/headcanon thing because it’s been a while and my mind is still on gem/jewel stuff (so hope you don’t mind!)

Okay, so Kenma I think would go with a warm colored gemstone, and citrine would work well with him! “Protection against evil thoughts” because we know Meiko has ramped up is insecurity and lowered his self-esteem.

I mentioned this before last time but Sakusa is definitely onyx. That black is iconic, and “sharpening wit” would make sense with his grace for word play and snark.

Akaashi is an interesting one...I think sapphire. I mean, sapphire can have many colors besides the classic dark blue, so that’s one thing, but it’s known for “loyalty and a pledge of trust” which Akaashi gave. I think it’s suitable for him.

Suga...initially I was thinking pearl would match him in terms of appearance, but actually looking at my reference, turquoise would work really really well with him. “Protect from evil, maintain virtue, bring good luck”. Would work well.

For Atsumu and Osamu I wanted something that could represent their duality. My first thought was gold and silver. I mean, it’d fit in terms of appearance but I’m not sure that would be the best comparison. Gold doesn’t rust so it fits Atsumu who never fell for Meiko’s tricks. Silver has been said to vanquish dark/evil beings (vampires, werewolves, the classic silver bullets and stakes). It would be interesting to see if the comparison will apply to today’s update :D!

I like how my brain shut off and couldn’t remember anyone else for a second—anyway, Oikawa... every time I think of him, I want some hue of blue wwww. I guess Aquamarine “soothing influence” would work. Since he joined YN’s side, he has been able to see the big picture and be a voice of reason. He’s thoughtful and I think aquamarine which encourages long relationships is suitable because that is what he wanted. So yes, aquamarine.

Bokuto...is a tough one. I’m trying to still keep with their color schemes a bit. I think carnelian would work. “Health, luck, bold energy, warmth, joy”—it would represent him fine. It’s a bit more orange than I would prefer but it suits him so I think it’s okay.

Iwaizumi... emerald? I mean, he does suit green tones, and “rebirth, regeneration, new hope” would work just fine for him.

Right now my brain is complete mush and I can’t think of anything for Kuroo and Daichi. Like, Kuroo would be red, sure, but the more famous ruby/garnet I think don’t represent him fully because he is still rather contained. Hmm, would need to think about them more.

But I’d like your thoughts on this too :D!!

I wanna do something suitable for all colors for YN, so opal! YN has many different parts and colors and is overall a very vivid person—if you tilt opal, you see more and more faces and things underneath being brought into your eyes. YN may be seen from many different perspectives, but YN is always beautiful and amazing. So opal is what I think YN would be.

Anyway, I’ll end here :D! Need to eat lunch. Much love towards you fr0ggy! Make sure you eat and rest up too~ drink some water or any other fluid to hydrate! And keep warm too. Much love to all the fans and supporters and ask senders too! It’s really awesome seeing and hearing from all of you and seeing new faces with the old. Love the excitement and points you all bring up—makes my brain happy.

MAJDKD I NEED TO POST THE NEW CHAPTER BUT I HAD TO RESPOND TO THIS FIRST BESTIE ILY N I LOVE TUIS — I AM OBSESSED W THE CRYSTAL (??) STUFF??? IVE NEVER UNDERSTOOD IT BUT I THINK YOIVE EXPLAINED EACH GEM N WHY SO BEAUTIFULLY I AM IN LOVE W U KITH KITH UR SO LOVELY HAVE AN AMAZING DAY (sending u good vibes n anti-stress love >333)

[katara0524]

Impromptu Ramblings about the NEO:TWEWY Demo

In case y'all weren't aware, I've been a pretty big fan of TWEWY for a couple years now, and with the sequel coming out next month, the excitement I feel for this game is greater than ever :) I played the Demo for the first time yesterday, and following a couple views of some livestreams of others playing it, I felt like sharing my (very ramble-y) thoughts prior to the release of the full game. This post WILL contain spoilers for both TWEWY and NEO:TWEWY, so if you want to avoid those from now on, please block the tags: #twewy spoilers, #ntwewy spoilers, #neo twewy spoilers, #ntwewy, and #neo twewy ^_^ Oh, and if you wanna keep up with any other posts I make about my experience with this game, please refer to the tag "kat plays neo twewy" :)

-First things first: I have not watched the Final Trailer and I don't plan on doing so to avoid spoilers, especially after the pre-release era of KH3 where a lot of the later trailers spoiled a lot of the endgame content. That being said, I've seen some minor screenshots from the final trailer including what many believe to be characters from the original TWEWY, namely Shiki and Joshua. That is all I know about the Final Trailer and I would very much like to remain as blind as possible going into NEO :)

-The very first cutscene was quite ominous in the sense that this game is likely going to be about "changing fate" (a recently common theme in Squeenix games, which I do appreciate), perhaps leading off from the end of A New Day in the OG and trying to stop an Inversion of Shibuya. Also worth noting that A New Day had similar aspects in which the main character experienced "future visions" of tragic events, although in A New Day these events were not able to be changed, while in NEO it seems like one of the main "powers" our protagonist has is specifically to rewrite these events and avoid a "bad ending." Very interesting indeed!

-I really like the revamped comic book style dialogue scenes, it's much more fluid and modern, which is an excellent direction for the series to take!

-I would love to have an actual PokemonGO knockoff of Final Fantasy creatures, please Squeenix that would be incredibleeeeee

-Also the LINE stickers??? Are so cute???

-I would just like to point out that Fret is an absolute treasure throughout this entire demo, he's hilarious and I will protect him with my life

-UHHHH don't like that Fret picked up some Reaper Pins just out of nowhere.....or the fact that they're apparently popular all over Shibuya.............did y'all not learn anything from the OG game or what lmao

-Okay so when I first got the "curry or ramen" scene and heard NPCs talking about the new curry place replacing the old ramen place I became IMMENSELY distressed that Ramen Don was totally cut from the game because....well, Ramen Don is a King okay?? But I'm glad to learn that no, he didn't fall off the face of the earth, he's still in business and he's the one opening the curry restaurant lolol. PHEW, crisis averted!

-.....I don't like the sudden appearance of a Wall Reaper and being able to read NPC thoughts. Wtf happened when they left the ramen place??? Are they playing the Game alive somehow?

-Okay so I have my own theories about this "Swallow" character and what they're up to but considering this is only the Demo and I still Have No Idea What's Happening, I'm just gonna say that I think Swallow intentionally led Rindo and Fret to the Crossing so they could join the Game. I mean, add in the fact that Swallow still communicates with Rindo during the Game and you've got yourself a suspicious character right there lol

-"Hey they're shooting off fireworks!" Fret honey that's not fireworks oof (see also: "*laughs* I'm in danger")

-WOOOOOO way to traumatize Rindo right off the bat like that LMAOO

-The visuals for the intro are VERY GOOD, the song is pretty decent until it gets all "screamo" (which I absolutely cannot stand sorry lol)

-Shoka is every Customer Service employee ever and I respect that

-Susukichi went from being "meh" to "WOW THIS GUY IS FUN" in the span of 10 seconds and I also respect that (he is also built like an Absolute Unit which is hilarious)

-The Wall Reapers (and just Reapers in general) seem.....way nicer and more helpful this time around?? Like in the OG the Wall Reapers were SO RUDE gfhjgjdfkhn and yeah I'm sure we'll get some like that but the juxtaposition of the first Wall Reaper in the OG compared to the first one in NEO is insane.

-The puzzles are quite a bit more entertaining this time around even if it's generally the same "fetch quest" formula lol

-"Rindo's Group" way to go Fret HFKJDGHSDFKJ mans really left the default name in there lmao

-OKAYOKAYOKAY so to those who aren't aware I am a MASSIVE SIMP for Sho Minamimoto, he's my absolute favorite and I think about him daily. HIS INTRODUCTION IS. INCREDIBLE. I LOVE IT SM.

-GOD hearing him actually SPEAK FULL SENTENCES is just SO SURREAL I love this sm

-Also the remix of his theme???? NEO TRANSFORMATION????? IT'S SO GOOD????????? It's like gone from a Boss Theme to a more triumphant sounding theme and I am HERE for it (every version of Transformation is just INCREDIBLE and getting a new one is even better)

-I Love Him, Your Honor

-Also idk how exactly but it's kinda weird seeing Sho in the OG vs NEO, cuz while he's mostly the same Insane Math-Obsessed Catboy, he's.....calmed down quite a bit?? Like OG made a whole point of how poorly he cooperates with others (not to mention just being completely unhinged and trying to kill everyone), whereas here in NEO he's......actually kinda working with others??? HELLO???? Sir what happened to you and Neku during those 3 years I would love to know all about it

-I guarantee you Sho is still probably scheming shite and will likely pull some total insane BS later down the road, and I am very much looking forward to that. Also, is he looking for a certain Pin or something??? Cuz he keeps talking about different Pins and even mentions "this is just another Psych Pin" like he's actively looking for a Pin to do something with. Maybe it also has to do with the "latent powers of Players" thing he mentioned as well??? What is this dude UP TO oml (also is he in contact with Neku at all?? they're both technically fugitives at this point right?? WHAT HAPPENED AFTER A NEW DAY I AM BEGGING YOU)

-I seems like Sho ALSO has an idea of what's going on in this specific game (even if he won't admit it straightforward). Per his quote "The game's 142,857. Factor it out," he's essentially saying, "This game is a neverending cyle, figure out how to get out of it" (or at least that's what I got from his "cyclic number" nonsense lolol)

-I do like how Sho mostly stays out of sight until he's needed for a battle or assisting with a mission, that's kind of on par with his whole "uncooperative" quirk from the OG, plus he might literally have to stay out of sight of other Reapers and Players considering he's likely breaking the rules of the Game (not surprising considering him and Neku broke practically every rule in the book during OG)

-The nicknames for Sho- I can't- They're so FUNNYYYY GFHJSDFKJ

-He goes from being called "Pi-Face" and "Tabooty" in OG to "Mr. Minami" and "M-Teezy" in NEO LMAOO

-(Wowee I just realized I've been mostly talking about Sho oopsies sorry y'all, this is what I meant by thinking about him almost daily he is THAT much of a fav of mine ghfkjsd)

-Okay RIP Fret and Rindo for not getting literally ANY explanation as to how the Game works OOF, that is kinda cringe that whoever gets the Pin earns points, not whoever erases the Noise (which like I understand but also URRRGGHHH I WANNA SEE THE SQUAD SUCCEED)

-"I should be going home now it's getting late" Oh you sweet summer child-

-Also love the mention of parents in this game???? KH you could learn a thing or two from TWEWY (poor Rindo's mom fhgjkdh)

-KUBO IS HILARIOUS I SUPPORT HIM AND HIS GROSS FACE (also thank you Final Trailer thumbnail for spoiling my suspicions about him very cool smh)

-Kaie is a LAD I also support him, go King type those funky texts I believe in you

-FRET PLS STOP SCANNING FHGJKSDHKJFGHFKJ he's like me when I scan in OG during Weeks 2 and 3 and see Taboo Noise coming after me ghfjdshfj

-Also Rindo can you stay off your phone for TWO SECONDS ik you're trying to figure things out but Fret is a jelly boi and I don't want him to be upset with you my guy

-Sho being an actual sorta mentor to the kiddos?? Who are you sir this is so unlike you ghfgskj what happened to the guy who tried shooting children in the face 8 times over LMAO (granted he's probably just using them but it's still nice to see him actually cooperating and sharing knowledge with the kiddos aaaaa)

-EYO EIJI OJI THE TIKTOK INFLUENCER IS BACK LMAO

-hgjkfshgkjf "we aren't glorifying capitalism on my watch" THATS SO FUNNY TO ME GFHJFSDGHJKS (also an all-orange ensemble is disgusting you deserve jail for one thousand years fkn Cheddar Goldfish Cheezit ass woman)

-WICKED TWISTERS NAME DROP EYOOO we love to see it

-gfhsgjf Poor Rindo embarassing himself for the sake of the Game that's incredible

-R e t u r n t o M O N K E. That is all.

-Dialogue during boss battles is HELLA cool i love that

-HHHHH THE KANON SCENE MADE ME A N G E R Y FRET STOP SIMPING MY GUY says the girl with a Literal Simp Encyclopedia and simps for pixels on a screen daily

-Can't wait to see the other Reapers :eyes emoji:

-CAN'T WAIT TO SEE NAGI MY BELOVED YEAHHHH WOOOOOO AAAAND that's about it for the demo lolol, I absolutely CANNOT wait for next month, this game is gonna be INCREDIBLE holy hell Prepare for more simping, more screaming, and more vibing from Yours Truly :) I fully intend on sharing more general thoughts like this on both Tumblr and Twitter so it's not just reblog-retweet-reblog-retweet with the occasional comment fhgskjd

If you wanna witness my insanity up close and personal I have a Square Enix Discord server called Sea Side Dreamers! You can look it up on Disboard, or you can add me on Discord @Katara0524#9244 for a direct link :) We have topics about Kingdom Hearts, Final Fantasy, NieR, and ofc TWEWY (as well as other topics!), so if you want some good ol' chaos and chitchat, you're more than welcome to join!

[ichor-and-symbiosis]

Celebrate.

Shigaraki x f!Reader; NSFW.

Tomura had no idea what you were planning for Christmas. The day drew ever nearer, and you spent an abnormal amount of time worrying about overstepping boundaries or being an annoyance with your ideas. It’s not like you were officially dating – although with Tomura, you were sure that there would never be a talk about this. The strange state of your relationship clashed with your desire to celebrate with him. It took one casual comment from Kurogiri about Tomura’s tradition to spend his time drinking at the bar to convince you to at least try.

True to Kurogiri’s word, you found him at the bar, hunched over a half-empty tumbler of whiskey and an equally drained bottle beside it. The monitor behind him was switched off. Was he really sitting here by himself, without even his mentor to keep him company?

Upon seeing you at the door, Tomura’s muted expression morphed into standoffish distrust. He couldn’t fool you, though. You caught on to the way his posture straightened, the way he leaned ever so slightly towards you, and the sudden fire in his eyes.

“You don’t look very festive,” you lightheartedly said in greeting, carefully holding a mug in one hand and a wrapped box in another as you walked over to him. “At least wear a santa hat if you’re going to down an entire bottle of whiskey by yourself.”

Tomura glared at you from beneath a curtain of messy bangs hanging over his face. “What the hell are you doing here?”

“I was thinking we could spend the evening together.”

“Is that so?” he grumbled sarcastically. “Fucking your tight little hole a few times has made you pretty damn presumptive.”

You frowned at his crude statement, and refused to take the bait. Tomura was always at his worst when he was feeling upset. His reaction to your suggestion confirmed your suspicions. “Don’t be so sour. Look – “ You placed the mug on the countertop, and set the box beside it. “I brought you some hot chocolate. If you behave, you might even get to see what’s in this box.” You smirked at him. “You might like it.”

“Is it some sex thing?”

“It is not,” you deadpanned, settling down onto the seat beside him and resting your head on one hand as you looked at him expectantly.

He stared at you with those owlish red eyes, still trying to discern your motive. When the battle of wits had deemed you victorious, Tomura glanced down at the mug of hot chocolate. Holding his index finger out, he brought it closer to him for inspection. The warm glow of the lighting made it seem as though his gaze had softened while he eyed the drink. It might have been cute if not for the fact that he reached for his tumbler and dumped the remaining whiskey into your carefully crafted, whip cream-topped perfection.

You covered your face and sighed as he chugged the alcoholic concoction. At least he hadn’t kicked you out yet, right?

Tomura set the mug down and looked at the box. A bit of whipped cream graced the corner of his mouth, and you reached out to wipe it with your thumb. He narrowed his eyes at your approaching fingers, yet stood still to see what you would do. You smiled as your thumb came away with the remnants of whipped cream, and when you licked the sweetness away, Tomura’s gaze swept over your lips.

“Want to see what I got you?” you lightly asked, sliding the box over into view.

Tomura quietly stared at your mouth until you busied yourself with opening the container. Curiosity won over lust, and you felt a burst of happiness when he inched a little closer beside you and peered inside.

It was a small yule log cake topped with vanilla frosting, thin slices of chocolate, and strawberries. Nothing too fancy – you didn’t want to seem too corny with gamer-themed sweets. That’s an idea you were saving for next year, or maybe even Valentine’s Day.

“Ta-daaa,” you sang, reaching over the countertop to rummage around for some utensils. Your fingers hit cold steel, and you happily produced two forks as you settled back into your seat. “Merry Christmas, Tomura.”

He accepted a fork and wordlessly speared it into the cake. You were not bothered by his rudeness; the fact that he delved right in meant you had done something right. A vibrant red strawberry was calling your name. You plucked it off by its leaves and bit into the delicious fruit, enjoying the burst of flavor on your tongue as you licked the juice dripping from the bitten end.

A strange feeling washed over your side while you finished the strawberry. You glanced over at Tomura with your lips wrapped around the remnants of the fruit. His eyes were practically boring holes into you, his fork paused in his mouth as he leered at you.

“I thought this wasn’t a sex thing,” he said after sliding the fork out, swiping another piece of cake into his open mouth.

You were taken aback by his accusation. “What are you talking about?” you asked, ruefully blushing at whatever thoughts must be circulating through his head.

Tomura rolled his eyes. “You’re eating that strawberry like you’re sucking a dick.”

“That is so not my intention, you pervert!”

“And the log cake? Come on.” He threw you a wry look. “Obvious reference to how huge my cock is.”

“Oh my god.”

He mockingly sighed, an arrogant smile tugging at the corner of his mouth. Setting the fork aside, he said, “If you wanted to fuck, you could have just said so – “ and grabbed a strawberry by its leaves. “Although I do appreciate the effort.”

You frowned, hoping you looked every bit as unimpressed as you felt. Even when he brought the strawberry to your lips, your mouth remained stubbornly closed.

“Open.”

You cursed the twinge of pleasure that coursed through you at his commanding tone. Tomura’s smile curled downward as he pressed the strawberry a little firmer. Slowly, you parted your lips to let the tip slide inside, holding his stare while you let him shove the fruit deeper into your mouth. Before he could figure out a way to make you gag on it, you bit into the strawberry and quickly swallowed the sweet flesh, quirking a brow at his inscrutable expression.

His eyes lingered on your lips for a moment, before he looked at the remnants of the fruit still held between thumb and forefinger. “We’re supposed to kiss now, right?” he grumbled, blushing lightly as he looked back at you. It was almost accusatory, like you were somehow responsible for his strange behavior.

“Are we?” you coyly replied.

His nose scrunched up cutely as he waved the leafy stem of the strawberry. “Do I have to spell it out for you? Mistletoe. Come here.”

How can someone so crass be so endearingly romantic? You entertained the thought of teasing him, but something about the way he reached out to grasp your thigh … the way he leaned in almost imperceptibly, glaring at you in challenge even as his eyes flitted between your lips and somewhere beyond your shoulder –

You placed a hand over his own on your thigh, cupped the back of his head, and brought him forward to meet your lips. Almost immediately his tongue delved into your open mouth, and you felt his hold on your thigh tighten as you tasted each other’s sweet flavor. The faux mistletoe was thrown away in favor of trying to wrap his arm around your waist, and Tomura growled into the kiss as he forced you out of your seat to stand between his legs. You allowed him to manhandle you, sucking his lips and feeling every rough crack and scar along your tongue as you cupped his face to tip it up to your searching mouth.

You hadn’t even intended the evening to end up like this. You just wanted to spend some quiet time with Tomura. But really, you should have known better. When have you ever had a platonic moment with this man?

He pushed your shirt up, breaking the kiss to murmur, “Should have come naked,” and coaxed you to toss the clothing aside. His hands were everywhere, sliding over your soft skin as he left wet open-mouthed kisses along your collarbone.

You were quickly growing warm and needy from his desperate touches. The moment you unclipped your bra, Tomura roughly groped your breasts, twisting your stiff nipples and nipping your sensitive skin. You were arching your back in encouragement when he suddenly leaned away, and you dug your nails into his shoulders in anticipation as he blindly reached behind you for something.

His hand came back with a dollop of frosting coating two fingers. You bit your lip and allowed him to rub the white substance all over your nipple. Tomura took his time, lightly pinching your stiff bud as the strange cold sensation contrasted with his warm fingers.

“This is the only gift I need,” he rasped, and shoved his sticky fingers into your waiting mouth as he leaned in to suckle the frosting off your skin.

You moaned around his fingers, swirling your tongue over them and enjoying the electric jolts of pleasure that shot straight to your core with each harsh suck of his mouth. He was relentless, scraping his teeth over your nipple and loudly sucking everywhere he could reach. And when he started questing upwards, dragging his hot tongue over your breast to spread his saliva all over you, you could only dig your fingers into his hair and urge him to continue, whimpering his name as best you could with his fingers still in your mouth.

There was a fine line between Tomura’s tongue feeling heavenly or like a huge slug. But you loved it when he was gross with you. All the more reason to entice him into showering with you later.

Tomura yanked his fingers out of your mouth once he had finished sucking a blossoming red bruise onto your throat. “Turn around,” he breathed, wasting no time in staggering onto his feet as you quickly shoved your pants down your legs and braced yourself on the countertop with your ass perked up for his convenience.

He stepped onto your bunched up pants and underwear to bring them to the floor and slapped your ass to shed your last article of clothing. You moaned at the delicious sensation and followed his order, spreading your legs as wide as he directed you to.

The feeling of his fingers delving between your folds briefly knocked you back into reality. “That better not be – “

Your head was shoved down onto the wooden surface of the counter, and Tomura forced his fingers into your mouth again. The lingering taste of sweetness calmed your nerves. “I’m not stupid,” he growled, and the fingers slipping through your wet folds suddenly speared into your cunt. You let out a choked gasp, and he laughed freely. “Hey, hey, was the vanilla frosting a euphemism for my cum?”

You attempted to mutter a muffled uh-uh, but the slow, torturous drag of his fingers in and out of your clenching hole left you a drooling mess.

“You don’t even need to think about getting fucked, do you?” His fingers slipped out of you with a wet suctioning sound to play with your clit. “You just naturally think of perverted shit. Such a perfect little slut.”

You rolled your hips to meet his languid strokes, bunching your hands into fists as you pathetically whined for more.

Tomura paused. You could hear his labored breathing – this must be affecting him more than he let on. Your pussy throbbed from the loss of his touch as he fumbled with his pants, and you felt a trail of juices pulse out of your hole when his hard cock slipped through your folds.

He wrapped an arm around your waist and leaned onto your back as he humped his cock between your thighs. “You just need to think about me,” he whispered, needy and breathless. “You do, don’t you? Because you’re here … “ You sucked in a lungful of breath when he took his fingers out of your mouth and curled his arm around your torso to grasp a breast. “You wanted to be here. With me.”

“I did, Tomura – “ His name tapered off into a moan when he shoved his cock inside you. “I – I wanted to – mmmhh – to – aaah – “

Each word hitched in your throat as he thrusted deeper into you, dragging the head of his cock over a spot that made your toes curl and your skin flush from pleasure. “Wanted what?” he demanded, fondling your breast as he kissed your shoulder blade.

“I wanted … to make you happy,” you admitted, thankful that he could not see your shy expression.

And you could not see his. The way his eyes widened, the blush that colored his cheeks, all you could perceive was his arms tightening around you as he hid his face in your neck and jackhammered into you with such ferocity that you could barely hold yourself up, crying out from the onslaught of sensations.

His balls slapped heavily over your clit with each thrust, spreading your combined juices all over your thighs. The dingy bar was small enough as it was, and the humid smell of sex and sweat quickly permeated the stale atmosphere. 

For whatever reason, your lust-addled mind thought to glance at the monitor that stood watch over the bar. Its black screen reflected back at you, giving you an unobstructed view of Tomura fucking you from behind like an animal in heat. You stared at the reflection, transfixed, cheek pressed to the counter and mouth open as you moaned and drooled and watched his cock disappear inside you with each thrust.

You still could not see Tomura’s face. But you could feel his wiry arms around you, the firm bite on your shoulder as he whined from impending release, the wet drag of his tongue on your skin, the tender way he nuzzled his face along your throat and moaned your name –

Your release was blinding and sudden, tearing a drawn out cry from you. Tomura followed in short order, holding your slack frame up as he pressed his hips flush against yours and spilled himself inside your cunt. His panting tickled your ear, and he grinded himself for a moment longer, until his final spurts died out and he could focus on breathing again.

He left you slumped against the countertop with a slap to your ass. You let out a weak groan and shivered at the feeling of his cum oozing out of your hole and trailing down your thighs.

Tomura reappeared beside you, and you struggled to stand straight, holding the counter for leverage. You met his eyes, curiously analyzing his unreadable expression. “You’ve put me in a festive mood,” he began, adding a sarcastic emphasis to his words. “So I’ll let you choose if you want to be selfish or sacrifice your comfort.”

“What are you talking about – “

“Too late, I’m making the decision.” You jolted as he suddenly pressed a cloth between your legs. “Stay still.”

You did, for whatever good that did you. Never once had Tomura ever cleaned you up after sex. This really was a true Christmas miracle, but you were not foolish enough to break this strange mood with japes at his expense. It was kind of nice to feel him carefully trail the dark cloth up your inner thighs to wipe the cum away.

It lingered at your crotch, pressed up against your drenched folds. You looked up at him, and he stared down at you, and you were so damn ready for him to kiss you. But the bastard broke eye contact, threw the cloth onto the counter, and sat down without another word to you.

“Are you really just gonna go back to eating right now?”

Tomura yanked the cake over to him and helped himself to a forkful. “I’m hungry,” he mumbled as he chewed. “Fucking you is a whole workout. I deserve this.”

You were ready to bitch at him, but the fire died out without explanation, replaced by a feeling you were not ready to admit to yourself yet. 

“You do,” you quietly said, and ignored the way he looked up at you, that mixture of uncertainty and guardedness. No, you paid no mind to it, not while you brushed his bangs away from his forehead as he ate his cake, and certainly not when you pressed a kiss to the rough scars.

 And when you sat down to join him, leaning over to steal a piece of cake and popping it into your mouth, you did not pay any mind to the way he seemed to stare at you after the kiss, silent and stiff.

 ____________________________

Kurogiri found quite a mess waiting for him the next day. Several bottles of alcohol left in various stages of emptiness, an open box with hints of frosting and strawberry stems, a mug drained of its contents, and two forks to finish off the visual story. He sighed, hoping this crime scene meant you had succeeded in lifting Tomura’s spirits.

His bar rag had been taken from its usual place and left discarded on the counter. Kurogiri nearly touched it before the voice of his master rung out from the monitor.

”You do not want to touch that, Kurogiri.”

Everything on the counter was promptly disposed of through a portal.