#and the worst is that he is a great person. he accepts me as trans. im afraid and he allowed me to cry on his shoulder

[transfemmbeatrice]

beatrice muchadoaboutnothing is a trans woman: a brief treatise

thematically, i think in a play about the social vulnerability of women, having a character be a trans woman just makes sense as a way to provide depth to that idea. specifically, i love the concept of beatrice's view of men being informed by her own experiences as a closeted trans woman (it's amazing what people will say in front of you when they think you're one of them) and as someone later facing sexism and transmisgoyny.

usually when someone does a trans reading of this play/character, they look at beatrice's famous speech about wishing she was a man and interpret her as a trans man, which is perfectly valid! but this idea started for me with the simple thought that i wanted an out and accepted trans character to play with rather than a closeted one who cannot transition, just as a matter of personal preference at that particular time and with this particular text. but then i kept thinking.

as above, the concept of beatrice reading men for filth in the context of having lived among them is great. the "oh god that i were a man" speech is extremely disparaging of men and what they claim to be vs how they actually wield their power. what she wishes is that she had the power that men have automatically in her society--felt all the more keenly because there was a time when she was able to wield that power and she gave it up to be happy, to be herself, to be free in a different way. (here is where i sometimes imagine beatrice regretting ever transitioning, believing that her own happiness and health is less important than having the power to protect hero's happiness and health, because i love angst.) but now that the worst has happened, she is reduced to begging a man for help and it's demeaning and infuriating and tragic.

i also love turning on its head the line "i cannot be a man with wishing, therefore i will die a woman with grieving." being a trans person, dealing with internalized transphobia, knowing that transitioning will put a target on your back, wishing you could just be the gender you're born as--but no amount of wishing will make her not a woman. i think she loves herself and her gender but the play is focusing on points of conflict so that's what i'm talking about here.

in a play about misogyny, the vulnerability of women, and the hypocrisy of men, a trans woman has a unique perspective on both masculinity and femininity both as genders and places in society. (in the ideal version, i think john would be a trans man to mirror this experience, but that would require him to be rewritten to have actual depth and personality and all that is a different essay). there is also just a particular kind of strength that comes from having to carve out and defend your identity in that way which i think fits her very well.

lastly, a couple of other miscellaneous things from the text that can tie in:

beatrice recounting "a double heart for his single one" meaning both "i loved him twice as much as he loved me" and "i loved him as two people: [birthname] and beatrice"

benedick insisting he wouldn't marry her even if "she were endowed with all that Adam had left him before he transgressed." Adam, not Eve. in MY illustrious opinion, this is benedick saying "i don't care HOW big her dick is i'm NOT gonna marry her."

[they-them-that]

Light trigger warning: gender roles, misogyny, transphobia

I love Ouran Highschool Host Club and with the Shoujo classic that it is, I adopted the general consensus that the show was "ahead of its time" with how it portrayed gender. Haruhi will always be a non-binary icon but upon rewatching it, especially after my own trans awakening, I remembered something that never sat right with me and that was how Tamaki treated Haruhi. My two cisgender friends didn't seem to pick up on the same problems even though they also consider Haruhi to be non-binary which made me think I was just projecting onto the anime. But another friend of mine later told me how it was much more "heterosexual" than she remembered that helped validate the feeling I had.

Although Haruhi doesn't like to make a fuss about gender, the anime does and it constantly reminds us that no matter what Haruhi feels, she is still a "girl". Tamaki is the worst offender of this mentality where even his entire perspective on Haruhi changes as soon as he finds out she's afab. A huge part of Tamaki's character is that he dotes on Haruhi "like a father" where his actions are actually founded on the authoritative, patriarchal belief that he needs to "protect" her because she is a woman. Not just protect her from actual harm either but from things like kissing someone and wearing a swimsuit...

Although in certain ways, we're supposed to laugh at Tamaki's overbearing nature, he's never actually taught to respect Haruhi's autonomy. In what felt like every episode, Tamaki fixates on Haruhi's assigned sex much to her annoyance. Yet rather than learning to look at Haruhi as a person regardless of gender, we're expected to see his obsession with upholding gender roles as a sign of affection. This felt clearest in episode 8, "The Sun, the Sea, and the Host Club!" where Haruhi confronts two men for harassing her female peers. She gets shoved into the water where Tamaki saves her but the conflict arises when he scolds Haruhi for standing up to men at all. The message emphasizes to us that "Haruhi is a girl" and it's something that she has to accept for her own well being while Tamaki's anger is meant to be perceived as chivalrous rather than patriarchal and heteronormative. The reality is, even if Haruhi was in danger, that isn't actually her fault but the fault of the men who felt entitled to women's bodies (something Tamaki is guilty of, even if not to the same level of aggression).

I still cherish OHSHC but it hasn't fully stood the test of time as I've been led to believe. That's not to rob gender queer people the comfort they feel from the show but that for myself, it's a bit hard to look past the cishet energy that the anime exudes. Although I see Haruhi as non-binary, the show doesn't seem to agree and goes great lengths to invalidate Haruhi's gender indifference. It's tragically common in anime and manga where trans-coded afab characters are reminded that they're still women and it's usually "proven" to them through patriarchal scenarios that put CIS men in a role of dominance. A lot of the time, these women are only gender nonconforming out of happenstance or circumstance rather than by choice, which even includes Haruhi Fujioka (she only cut her hair because there was gum in it). That's not to conflate gender expression with identity but it does feel like we're only being met half way, especially when the anime still romanticizes the gender dichotomy with Haruhi and Tamaki's relationship. I would've loved to see Tamaki be able to toss the notion of gender the same way Haruhi is able to and have that be the groundwork in which their mutual feelings blossom. Instead, it just felt like we got a man who stubbornly wants someone who grew up without gender labels to visualize herself the way he does, as a "woman".

[plumesofio]

“Tme/tma is wrong because no trans person has gendered power over another” that’s just straight up not true. I’m trans and yet sure as shit have power over transw&fs. If wym is that other trans ppl don’t inherently all have power over tw&fs I get what ur saying, that’s an overly simplified view of things. But like. Some do and I get why tw&fs wanna talk abt it.

During my first job out as trans, I was still early in transition and most ppl just saw me as a kinda ugly cis girl. I’d cut my hair shortish and started dressing masc and wore my little he/they pin. I was the only trans person there at first. And yeah it wasn’t a great time that first year. Customers at my job would ask me what I was and misgender me on purpose. But with my coworkers, as much as I chafed against this being the case, I was taken in as one of the girls. Later a new supervisor transferred in, let’s call her Laura. She was a cishet white woman with a little pride flag pin, ‘cause she had a gay kid and allegedly supported gay ppl. She got my pronouns wrong a lot, no matter how often I corrected her (and when she used em she only used they, never he) and that sucked major ass. But for the most part she was nice enough to me. A bit after that though, a visibly trans woman was hired, Destiny. We quickly became friends so I got to hear a lot about how the work environment was going for her. To put it briefly, Laura started up a little mean girl clique with other employees that was all awful to Destiny. Like misgendering her, insulting her, giving her all the worst manual labor tasks, spreading rumors. Destiny is one of the kindest most genuine human beings on the planet I’ll have you know, she didn’t do a thing to deserve this treatment. It came to management’s attention but instead of firing Laura she just got transferred to a better position somewhere else. Even outside of that, customers would call in to complain about Destiny over nothing while misgendering her. Eventually she even got hate crimed when a customer called her a slur and threw a full drink at her. Neither of us work there anymore. But the point is—I could’ve joined that mean girl clique if I’d wanted to. I had the ability to be horrible to Destiny with little to no downside if I so chose. I had oodles of social power over her even though we were both trans. This isn’t the situation of every transmasculine person but like. There, in that store, I was the tme, and she was the tma. Plain as day.

I doubt the tme/tma framework will be used in its current state forever, it’ll probably improve over time. But if you want every trans woman and fem to just Accept that no trans person has any power over them? You have a lot of perspective to gain.

[mueritos]

Hi Matteo,

I just wanted to say that I really appreciated the most recent comic you posted. It feels like it came at the perfect time for me lol. I’m in a bit of a transitional stage right now(in many ways) and I’ve basically gotten used to feeling like I’m disconnected and free floating. I know it won’t always be like that but it’s been rough. I have a friend who’s also a trans guy, though he transitioned several years before me and is now stealth, and though I cherish his friendship and appreciate his support, I sometimes find it hard to relate to his experience as a white guy with supportive parents. To some extent, my queerness has always felt very separate to my identity as a child of Mexican immigrants. I recently got the chance to visit family in Mexico and despite loving the experience, I was just so uncomfortable the entire time having to present as a girl. I’ve been trying to build up the courage to tell my parents that I’m starting T and it’s made me feel sort of alone because it’s a choice that I’ll have to defend myself. Idk, this comic just reminded me that there are other people who have gotten through these situations just fine and it was cool to see. I’m sorry for the long ramblings, I had a point initially but I kind of lost track of it. I mainly just wanted to thank you for what you do, it’s really nice to know that there are people out there like you.

hey friend! its not easy being us, but im proud of you for hanging in there. I personally haven't been to Mexico since I was 9 because I fear having to present as a girl, though I feel that no one down there would ever remember who I am enough to know I was born as one. I feel you on having white trans friends. I have one who I am very close to, but its hard to relate. His parents are so accepting in ways that mine aren't, and my parents do love and accept me! But that sort of acceptance in a Mexican family isn't mainstream. I had to accept that I was disappointing and hurting my parents GREATLY by choosing myself, all while knowing they still loved me.

It's weird. Even when your parents/family do come around, it's not 100%, but it's not like they dislike you. If anything, I have such a great relationship with my mom rn. We talk for hours about things I never would have thought we could ever talk about. My dad calls me as Matt often, but he still calls me by my old nickname when he's giving me kisses on the forehead.

Choosing yourself is not something we're supposed to be doing as children of immigrants. Every choice we make has to be for the betterment of the family. You might be the only one in your corner for a while, but the fight is worth it. Build community outside of your family where your presence isn't questioned. You're going to need it. Plan for the worst, and plan for the best.

Trans latines are out there. We are here! Many of us are thriving despite the horrors haha. Hang in there friend :]

[rose-tinting]

the amount of misinformation that has been circling outside of neopets circles I swear

I see a new rumor every time

“They’re free from nft bros” Nope. Owned by one!

“The original team rebought them” God fucking no and you should not want them to, Adam Powells little meltdown over neopets users criticizing his new crypto venture is reason enough lol.

“The company was sold to Neopets Internal Teams” They sold it to the guy who used to head the former NFT project and are promising this means TNT has more freedom “under new leadership“ with “no current plans for crypto/NFTs” (This is not a promise not to make them)

One of the “brand ambassadors” who is supposed to help TNT with the knowing and understanding the userbase is some celebrity who’s wife is also a celebrity who I’ve seen people CLAIM used to be a Neopets mod. Does that sound like a neopets user who can tell the neopets team what the average user wants? No call for users who aren’t celebrities to become brand ambassadors has been made afaik.

Current Neopets mods are silencing trans people for mentioning HRT as well as top surgery and ignoring cis people talking about pregnancy, death, and surgery. (Have seen these boards go on for several hours and never get deleted even after a heated debate on one one about abortion) 

There’s items and backstory on the site that are racist. Neopets users have asked these be addressed. Do you think this “brand ambassador” will address any of that? Why does the ambassador need to be a celebrity? Unless the actual intent is to have “ambassadors” who sell neopets as a brand to the potential new userbase and isn’t about “listening to the users” at all.

god can one person with a huge following please for once just reblog and acknowledge the TRUTH. (doesn’t have to be from me I’d just like the actual info to be spread!) Awareness will help us keep the worst from happening! Pretending everything is fine until it isn’t is NOT the way!

If you want the actual info on the site Neopets has a fansite dedicated to reporting Neopets news including everything TNT tries to sweep under the rug

https://www.jellyneo.net/?comments=14391

A direct quote from their article on this

“ New CEO of Neopets is Dominic Law, who previously headed the Neopets Metaverse and brokered a "management buyout deal" “

Please if you’re reading this

stop spreading misinformation

spread the real information

make your own post even

this could go either way right now

this is not a “neopets renaissance”

this is a crossroads and we don’t know where we’re going yet. It could be great, or it could be the end of the site.

(Editing my reblog in so it can hopefully get seen too, I was provided with more accurate info on the brand ambassador.)

@pirakeet Thanks! Was actually hoping someone COULD correct this :3 Cause I was REALLY HOPING it wasn’t what it seemed since all I could find was a twitter post with an attached video where he accepts it (I immediately fled twitter may be why)

[Image Text ID]  Posted by tumblr user pirakeet: I’m not correcting anything, but just letting you know the “brand  ambassador” program has been made available - just presumably not in  the ‘john legend’ sense:  https://portal.neopets.com/brand-ambassador-program  and for clarity, i’ve been popping off about the difference, this isn’t a  “gotcha moment”.   There’s more info when you click “apply” and it takes you to a google  doc [End Id]

As I said I’m more interested in the truth being spread so I hope this can be seen!

[wingedcatastrophe]

About Me

☆ Harrow, 26, he/they pronouns, gay and trans ☆ I like space a normal amount ☆ I have two cats I will never shut up about ☆ I use my likes as a bookmark system, to hold on to things I want to check out/add to my queue until I have time to do so

About My Writing

☆ I primarily write sci-fi and fantasy ☆ I write characters from a variety of identities and sexualities ☆ Not every story I write features romance ☆ I am always open to tag and ask games, as well as general asks! I participate in theme days like sts and wbw. ☆ I never really know what to post from my own stuff, but I reblog a variety of stuff from those I follow

What I Want to Follow

☆ I love love love superpowers, fantasy, and sci-fi stories ☆ huge fan of found family, old/dead gods, bastardization arcs, and extensive character/world building ☆ I love conlangs and would love to talk with other writers who have conlangs ☆ Mutuals can ask me for my discord!

My WIPS

The Chaos In Justice || First Draft || Max Greenwich has just gained acceptance to the Grand Chaos Institute, home of the next generation of the world’s worst supervillains. It’s not long before he finds himself uncovering a plot to end the world, and he must team up with a group of heroes and villains alike to protect everyone. found family ; what it means to be good/evil ; fate vs free will Lantern’s Light (title pending) || First Draft in Progress || Sorran would be the first to admit they’re not a great person, in fact, they’re kinda a bitch. But when they happen to extend a bit of kindness to someone in need, it turns out the “someone” is actually an old god. An old god who has now decided Sorran is her new champion, and now they’re stuck babysitting the reborn champion of the gods in some epic quest to defeat a threat to all of existence. found family ; redemption/bastardization arcs ; mix of high and modern fantasy ; parallel story arcs

[jojotichakorn]

for the ask game... toey! 🙌

damn, y'all decided to really indulge me today and have me write out a million headcanons! well, thank you 🥹

choose a character and ask about my headcanons here, if you like

🏳️‍🌈 a sexuality headcanon

biromantic asexual.

🏳️‍⚧️ a gender headcanon

honestly, he's kind of giving binary trans guy vibes, so let's go with that <3

😇 a headcanon about their religion/lack thereof

very religious, buddhist obviously. can't say any more on that, because i am unfortunately not very knowledgable about buddhism, but yeah.

🧸 a headcanon about their childhood

from the little that we know of his parents, it seems like they accepted the fact that he suddenly decided to study art, which is a good sign. he also seems fairly well-adjusted. but we do know he was bullied at school, which means his nice home life was unfortunately up against his shitty school life, so he has had some bad experiences during his childhood for sure.

👻 a headcanon about what scares them

horror movies! cannot stand them. has nightmares after watching them all the time. psychologically, abandonment, obviously (thanks, q /lh).

🎶 a headcanon about music

post-punk for life, actually.

💤 a headcanon about their sleep

he falls asleep really easily ✨ imagining scenarios ✨

💝 a headcanon about their love language

i think quality time wins with him. just being there, next to q, was enough for him. but also acts of service, because he legit giggled and kicked his feet, when q sharpened his pencils.

🫂 a friendship headcanon

despite his charming and adorable personality, he doesn't make friends that easily. he really only got close with matt organically. otherwise, fang and phum started protecting him first, and he got close to our main friendship group through becoming q's mentee.

💔 an angsty headcanon

he spent a lot of time crying and wondering what he's done wrong after q disappeared :(

🪢 a headcanon about their family

like i mentioned, when i talked about his childhood, i think his parents are really lovely. oh, and he is an only child.

📓 a headcanon about their hobbies

to top off skateboarding and drawing, he gives me gamer vibes.

👗 a headcanon about their clothes

he is giving someone who dresses at a store for skaters but doesn't actually care about fashion that much. he has the familiar baggy jeans and shoes and everything, but they don't feel that intentional.

🔪 a headcanon relating to fighting/violence

just absolutely not a violent person at all.

🌟 a headcanon about their desires/wishes

i don't think he's quite there yet, but paired off with my gaming headcanon, i think he's gonna wanna be something like a concept artist for games and stuff in the future.

🥇 a headcanon about what they’re best at

he's great at art! no questions there! he might not have that immediate natural talent like q, but he's really good and he improves daily.

🍫 a headcanon about food

he loves sweet things. can't live without soda and chocolate and snacks.

🎭 a headcanon about what they lie about

to be honest, despite all the shenanigans, i don't think he is big on lying.

❤️‍🔥 a romantic headcanon

he is a very softly romantic person. i don't think he's huge on any "classic" romantic gestures, none of that restaurants and roses and things. but he is very romantic in the big sense, i'm sure the fact that he has been in love with q this whole time and has been waiting for him is proof enough of that. and he definitely loves their special little romantic quirks, like the sticky notes.

😺 an animal related headcanon

he adores animals of all sorts and qtoey are probably gonna have a whole entire zoo at their home in a couple of years.

😭 a headcanon about the worst thing that happened to them

probably unfortunately q disappearing. all the school stuff is definitely a close second, but i think his sticky note crush just caused that special kind of self-doubt, and no one was in his corner (regarding that particular situation) to support him with what he was going through and convince him he wasn't at fault.

😶 a random headcanon!

he is deeply monogamous or, as i like to call it, delusionally loyal. meaning that even if he was approached by someone, who was interested in him, in that period between q disappearing and them getting close again, he would reject that person, because he was waiting for q.

[duckprintspress]

I just wanted to post a note publicly about a post I reblogged earlier today. An account has been started for les4les books, with a focus on "gold star" lesbian relationships. I didn't reblog the post as an endorsement, but simply to help spread the word. Whether that was a great choice on my part is debatable, but in retrospect I should have at least tagged biphobia so people's block lists could catch it, and I apologize for not doing so. I also had asked in the tags if trans women are included. because trans-exclusion is a big huge nope, even to share for the benefit of others. A lesbian is a lesbian, whether cis, trans, using he/him, butch, femme, etc.

Long story short, I have now:

deleted the reblog

sent an Ask to the OP to explicitly request clarification on whether they include trans lesbian women in their acceptable recommendations.

I'm sorry that my reblog caused discomfort.

I don't think it's necessarily wrong for people to desire a resource that highlights the kinds of relationships that they're most comfortable reading, in this case lesbian-lesbian relationships - to me, this is akin to accurately tagging works so that people can find what they want and avoid what they don't - and it was in support of that belief that I'd reblogged it despite my reticence on some of the post's wording and especially the lack of clarity on trans inclusion, and I should have gotten the answer to the question of trans inclusion before sharing, and have tagged appropriate for block lists.

As always, thank you for your patience with me as I run this blog and your support of the Press, and a special (anonymous) shout-out to the person who took the trouble to give me the benefit of the doubt and DM with their concerns, rather than just assuming the worst of the Press. <3

As a final note: TERFs are NEVER welcome here. I'm non-binary, and many trans folks are involved with the Press, including at least one trans female lesbian, and we have a wlw story with a trans lesbian, and lots and lots of works with bi characters, so...well, that's where we fall on this topic.

[theofreakingbell]

✨🏳️‍⚧️ a special announcement🏳️‍⚧️✨

so some of you have known this for a while. some of you haven't. and I've wanted to make this post for a while but I haven't had the energy, or the brain space and quite frankly I feel so safe on here I straight up forgot I haven't come out yet. soooooo

I've been trying to write this post for a while now but I haven't really known how to. I'm torn between writing something super casual because I feel very comfortable on here which feels TOO casual, since it's a big thing. and then I want to write a ton of words and touch on some more really personal notes but I don't have the energy for that rn honestly, and I know part of myself feels like I must justify it with showing people my pain, which is wrong and I shouldn't have to. Maybe someday I'll write something longer on the subject, but for now, here goes. 

I'm trans :) 

my pronouns are they/them and he/him and I am a nonbinary man. It took me a long time to find words that felt like they fit my experience but so far I like those the most. I am both :) I also identify with genderfluidity because it feels like it fluctuates how much is what, but stays consistently under those two 'realms' of gender, as it were. migratory bird. lol

Since this is this blog I also want to say that Loki has been a vital part of all of this, and I may write more on that at some point because it's been a huge thing in my life. I tried writing a coming out letter to my family once and ended up writing about Loki for ages, not instead, but because I had clung to him like a life raft in some of the worst times of my life for reasons, and a lot of those reasons have to do with gender. his presence and validation in that realm and others literally saved my life when I was younger and getting to love him and experience him as myself with a heck of a lot less shame than I used to carry about loving him and with the knowledge of myself and why I love certain things has been one of the most legitimately happy and wonderful things I have experienced these last few years, which have largely sucked otherwise bc of health stuff. Y'all are a big part of that happiness and I am so so greatful for you and I hope you can accept this about me :) 

❤️❤️❤️ - J

[liquidchaser]

1, 4, 6 ?

Yayy thank you for sending. I'm gonna put these under a cut because I yap a lot.

1. How did they become how they are like today?

prolonged isolation is the easiest and most overarching answer... I don't mean relative loneliness but whole childhood devoid of friendship and joy kind of loneliness. No friends as a kid, was always the weird coworker at any jobs he had. Didn't keep them long. His only consistent point of contact is with his mother. While there's no evidence that points to it I project my own relationship with my mother onto him so they have a volatile relationship. Still lives with her but tries to be away from home when he can.

I do have the headcanon that he's trans, because I've noticed the type of isolation I've experienced feels scarily similar. Especially if we work under the theory that perhaps his mother isn't the most accepting. I think he'd have spent high school and middle school uncomfortable in his own skin, and saw no point in making friends, because he was terrified of being outed and even the "trial run" of a friendship where he'd try to sus out if they could be trusted with a secret like that, it was unbearable to be called that name, to have nicknames pulled from it. Something meant to indicate familiarity and closeness only served to remind him that they didn't know him, just the girl his mom thought she raised. College was easier. Still not great.

Simon doesn't strike me as someone whose experience with loneliness is scattered or even slightly relieved at any point. That's why I think he got so obsessed with Sophie. I got obsessed and acted so fucking similar when I made my first real friend. A lot of obvious desperation and insecurity on where I placed in her life. When someone else has lived a life, has a past, was known by people, but to you, they're the only person in your life... you know. Especially in adolescence and young adulthood.

4. What are their strengths?

Loyalty, for one. Stubborn, almost. This can lead to detriment to himself. He's quite open minded. Heavy topics are rarely off the table for him, if he had someone to talk to. I know we get a different view of Simon in his own mind, so I think in reality he is a lot more like he was in the flashback scene - he can't hide feelings if he wants to and is prone to just... blurting things out. And as a result of his own struggles he's not phased or upset easily. He's probably halfway decent at wound care. He's also like, very clearly bitter toward the world in most endings, but... I don't think he's a full on misanthrope until like, ending 1. He helps people just to do it. At his core he wants to help.

6. What is their biggest insecurity?

A lot. Simon views himself as unremarkable and bland at best - a side character in his own life. Anything he does, someone else has done it better. His words mean nothing because they come from such an underwhelming heart.

If you do manage to get through the plexiglass cage he's lived his whole life in, he always wonders if someone better is out there for you, even platonically. He's got a lot of baggage and to him he has no redeeming traits. He hasn't truthfully known anything beyond unrequited love at best and what equates to a social sensory deprivation tank at worst.

I suppose I could say "everything" but that'd be a cop out.

[talkingpointsusa]

Let the Dave Rubin Taylor Swift meltdown begin

Dave Rubin didn't take the presidential debate very well. He really didn't take Taylor Swift endorsing Kamala Harris well. I can understand this to a certain degree, it's been a pretty rough couple of days for Dave what with that whole "Unwittingly taking money from Russia to spread propaganda" thing and that other "My candidate chocked on national TV in front of the entire free world" thing.

Keep in mind when Dave starts rambling about Taylor Swift that his shows motto is "Crazy world, sane views" and his shows new theme song (which I'm 99% sure is AI generated) is "It's a crazy world, somebodies gotta have the sane views".

Somebody does indeed but it sure as hell ain't this guy.

01:41, Dave Rubin: "It's not really about the policies, it's really just about the narrative and I think we really saw a very very sharp example last night, lets say a very obvious example last night, of how the narrative is shaped and shifted right in front of our eyes because that was a three on one, that was not a debate, we've seen it in the post coverage."

So, right-wing media has settled on calling the debate rigged. It's the "8 year old who's angry that they lost a game" approach to politics. "Oh no, the moderators moderated the debate. We shouldn't do that anymore." Naturally, they're all ignoring the points where Trump made an ass of himself like when he declared that migrants in detention centres are forcibly getting trans surgeries or when he amplified the debunked racist smear about Haitian immigrants eating dogs. None of that was caused by the moderators, that was all Trump.

Part of what makes this all so embarrassing is that guys like Dave Rubin are constantly going on about how Trump is this political genius playing 4-D chess against the Democrats and yet simultaneously he turns into a blustery mess against three "dumb libs". Even if we're accepting that the debate was rigged, which it wasn't, Trump still should have mopped the floor with everybody there. You can't have both!

So, Dave launches into a diatribe about 9/11 which is just him politicizing a tragedy so he can push a narrative about the debate, gross. We won't dwell too long on it but he does say some royally stupid things in this segment.

05:02, Dave Rubin: "I wanted to just sort of show you something there because that was only 23 years ago and think of how fundamentally different the world is from that morning to this morning, like wildly different. The fact that there was no questions even asked about it at the debate last night and the one time it was referenced, Kamala Harris completely dismissed -- well, it wasn't referenced actually. Kamala Harris said that January 6th was the worst moment in US history since the Civil War, completely dismissing 9/11. I mean, absolutely disgusting."

Why were there no 9/11 questions at the debate? I don't know Dave, could it be because it was 23 years ago?! 9/11, while tragic, isn't a current issue. There are no people basing their vote around 9/11 related policy. If you want to talk about questions about terrorism and the Department of Homeland Security, fine, but I don't think any sane person was expecting any 9/11 related questions during the debate.

So, Dave does an ad for mattresses and then reads a tweet from Ben Shapiro, also Dave's super objective. Just oh so objective.

08:47, Dave Rubin: "So, it seems to me, I'm gonna try to cover this as always as objectively as possible, you know my feelings about these two candidates, you know my feelings about the two parties, you know my feelings about the mainstream media but it seems to me that the main takeaway is not 'Oh my God, Kamala got Trump on this policy' or 'Trump really had that great line that exposed her for being a fraud' or any of that. It really is the narrative thing around the mainstream media because watching that debate last night, I don't know how you could be an even approximate objective person and think that it was not a three on one."

Yeah, the main takeway people seem to be having is "Holy shit, Trump's nuts!" Also, Harris absolutely won the debate. She swept the post debate polling with a 23 point margin with 57% of respondents saying that she won the debate. Turns out that racist diatribes about migrants don't pull in the moderates, shocker.

Also, Dave sounds very objective just parroting dumb right-wing media talking points.

09:22, Dave Rubin: "They repeatedly, dishonestly, fact-checked Donald Trump instead of just letting Kamala retort and they did not do it to her once. She went on lie after lie after lie including very fine people which, as I said last night, it is the most debunked lie of all time."

Yeah, like the time where she fell for a Facebook hoax about migrants eating pets....oh wait, that's your guy.

Very fine people isn't debunked. There is a Snopes article saying that the claim that he called Neo-Nazi's very fine people is false but if these guys read past that appealing big red X they'd find this paragraph. Quote:

Editors' Note: Some readers have raised the objection that this fact check appears to assume Trump was correct in stating that there were "very fine people on both sides" of the Charlottesville incident. That is not the case. This fact check aimed to confirm what Trump actually said, not whether what he said was true or false. For the record, virtually every source that covered the Unite the Right debacle concluded that it was conceived of, led by and attended by white supremacists, and that therefore Trump's characterization was wrong. 

So, he didn't specifically call Neo-Nazi's at Charlottesville very fine people, he just both sidesed it. This is just a dumb semantics game. Trump absolutely should be criticized for that.

Dave then plays a clip of RFK Jr and then a clip of Trump with Hannity. Dave then plays a clip of Trump being fact-checked on crime being down (which it is). Naturally, the Dave Rubin Clip Show hasn't really changed much since the news about Russia broke out.

Anyway, here's Dave lying about the crime rate.

14:39, Dave Rubin: "You can argue actually, I think you can make an honest argument that it is a moderators job to fact-check, we all wish there would be a little more fact-checking right? So, when she lies about very fine people on both sides I would like a fact-check there. So I am not throwing David Muir under the bus as if he shouldn't fact-check but he only did it one way and actually Trump was right about that, we've got this from Washington Examiner. In fact, violent crime is up substantially from 2019 levels and last years 2023 apparent drop is less significant than it appears. Part of the problem is how police departments report offences to the FBI, that's exactly what Trump was referencing. The FBI asked, then demanded, that law enforcement agencies transfer away from the system that they used for decades to a new more detailed but onerous one"

Well, Dave finally gave me a specific, I love when they give me specifics.

So, the Examiner article that Dave's referring to is a Washington Examiner article called "Bad Data From The FBI Mislead About Crime". Since the Washington Examiner is journalistic garbage, I looked into this myself and found that they're being intellectually dishonest as hell.

First of all, the Examiner is looking at 2019-2023 whereas people saying that crime is down are looking 2022-2023. There was indeed a brief spike in crime during 2022 but that doesn't change the fact that crime is down now in 2024. The Examiner itself concurs that crime continued to drop from 2023 to 2024 meaning that Dave's own dumb source was forced to admit that crime is indeed down. Unfortunately, guys like Dave need crime to be up because that helps them panic their audiences into buying their junk.

16:21, Dave Rubin: "Go to New York City, see whats going on. See what happens the second the sun goes down, the types of people that are out on the street. They're out during the day too but then suddenly it's like a zombie movie, they all start coming out."

Yes, at night they DOUBLE come out! They're out during the day but during the night it suddenly becomes like a zombie movie and then they....come out again I guess? What an absolutely moronic statement.

Also, as somebody who's been to New York City and walked around there at night, no it's not like a zombie movie.

So, Dave complains about MSNBC which is just stupid. I'm not going to deal with it. MSNBC is a network I have lukewarm feelings about as it is (their website is better than their cable coverage) and Dave Rubin just sloppily rambling about clips from them that he's clearly taken out of context isn't interesting. What is interesting is Dave whinging about Taylor Swift. Dave reads her endorsement and then gets really mopey and stupid.

27:00, Dave Rubin: "It's all confusions that she said there, I don't know what the issues are she cares about so Taylor Swift, do you want 15 million illegals here bringing in fentanyl and taking out our cities? Is that what you want?"

I've discussed this on the blog before but migrants aren't bringing in most of the fentanyl, it mainly comes in on trucks and tractor trailers. So yeah, pretty bold of Dave to try and accuse somebody else of having "confusions".

Dave then has some high-level political analysis. All I can say is just...just look at this absolute moron.

27:45, Dave Rubin: "There's something -- I would say there's something even more nefarious. She obviously didn't write that statement, probably didn't even look at that statement but they put that out immediately after the debate because what they want to happen there -- what they want to happen there is that they want young girls to be angry at their parents. That's another piece of this, they're using her as a tool so that when a father comes home from work, and generally conservatives have jobs and he's worked hard all day to put food on the table for his family and he comes home from work, that the daughter will start screaming at him for supporting Donald Trump and then the wife will probably start screaming at him too because the wife doesn't want the daughter to be upset because they are trying to hatchet away at everything."

Ah yes, conservative dads. If there's one group of people famous for changing their worldview when their family challenges them on it, it's conservative dads. That's why every thanksgiving since, oh I don't know, the concept of presidential elections was established has been peaceful whenever politics comes up.

The pandering in that clip is also just painful. "Hello audience of mostly conservatives who hate me for my marriage, just wanted to let you know that you are all HARD WORKERS and that's why you shouldn't take what your family says seriously."

He goes on too and it just gets dumber from here.

29:44, Dave Rubin: "So think about it, that statement was planned, obviously. She didn't write the statement, somebody -- they pay somebody, a PR person or whoever it might be, to write that statement. The picture with the cat -- like, this was a plan right? She didn't just take a selfie with her cat and then write that thing up, obviously. They put that out immediately after the debate and then moments after that, Tim Walz is on television talking about how excited he is about the Taylor Swift endorsement. Really think how fucking pathetic, I think it's my first one since I came back, that this is."

Getting this riled up over a celebrity endorsement is pretty pathetic Dave. He does realize that she's wealthy enough to have a photo taken of her after the debate right? Or more importantly, that this endorsement doesn't really mean that much in the grand scheme of the election. I'm convinced that the only people who really gave it a lot of attention are Taylor Swifts fans and guys like Ben Shapiro and Dave Rubin who've been blowing a gasket about it since it dropped on Instagram.

31:07, Dave Rubin: "Ivy (?) just mentioned to me that Taylor Swifts tour that she's on was supposed to wrap up but they've now extended it to go through the election, do you think that's a coincidence right? Probably not."

So, Taylor Swifts master plan to steal the election is as follows:

Step One: Become famous over the course of decades by producing music.

Step Two: Go on tour during the election and endorse Harris after the debate

Step Three: Extend that tour through the rest of the election because...if you aren't on tour you'll just suddenly stop being famous I guess?

The Russians really go their moneys worth with this Dave Rubin guy. I wonder what the refund policy on grifters is. So, the rest of the show is pretty boring stuff. He plays a clip from the View at some point which is further proof for my theory that conservatives are the only people watching the View in 2024. Then he remembers that Taylor Swift is a person who exists and decides to get gross as hell.

58:30, Dave Rubin: "Taylor Swift endorses Kamala Harris on Instagram, after the debate on ABC, proudly calls herself a childless cat lady. Elon Musk, who they hate, he saw that and he wrote this; 'Fine Taylor, you win. I will give you a child and guard your cats with my life.' So, he's mocking. He's exposing the ridiculousness. Right, it's like Taylor Swift, you are a young pretty girl. Do you know what the gang members from Venezuela do to young pretty girls? It ain't pretty."

God, both Dave Rubin and Elon Musk are gross as all hell. Gotta hit that "fair white women will get raped by those scary brown people" button whenever you can I guess. Again, gross. Also, she's a 34 year old woman you misogynistic creep.

On the bright side, it certainly helps cement the fact that these guys are indeed weird as all hell despite their protestations.

Conclusion:

Well, that was a grown man having a conniption fit about a pop star endorsing a political candidate. The yearlong conservative meltdown over Taylor Swift is hilarious and I figured we could all use something on the lighter side after all the Matt Walsh we've been seeing on the blog lately. I'm sure we'll go back to naked racism and bigotry in the next post and all our souls will be destroyed oncemore but for now lets just take a moment to laugh at this absolute moron prattling on about Taylor Swifts supposed evil plans to throw the election.

Sources Cited:

Archacki, Liam. “Kamala Harris Sweeps First Batch of Post-Debate Polls by 23-Point Margin.” The Daily Beast, The Daily Beast, 11 Sept. 2024.

Bump, Philip. “Analysis | Fox News Twists Data on Economy and Crime to Attack Biden.” Washington Post, 9 Apr. 2024.

Sganga, Nicole, and Camilo Montoya-Galvez. “Fentanyl Seizures Rise at U.S.-Mexico Border — Here’s Why.” CBS News, 3 Feb. 2023.

[ivankov-save-me]

I'm spiraling pretty bad right now. I just got off the phone with my parents, and they've been conservative and voted Trump in the past, but I've always thought of them as reasonable people with bad information who felt forced into it. When I deconstructed a bit and found myself in the dreaded Radical Left (tm) (c) (r), I was so fucked up over how it would affect our relationship that I spent a month researching and writing an essay fully outlining why I changed my mind with citations and easy to use links and everything. I was like "I know my Dad. He cares about these issues and sees things like I did, surely something here will awaken something in him." He even said he was taking his time reading through it and taking his time! I thought maybe I'd pull him at least further away from the weird shit he sometimes said.

Evidently not.

He managed to fit in a "joke" about the racist lie Trump spouted about Springfeild, Ohio in the couple of seconds I spoke to him on the call. I've been off of Facebook for a while, so I had a friend look at his wall. Full of anti-Kamala sentiment (not the "Arms Embargo Now" kind, some Facebook conservative bullshit), anti-trans sentiment, and just run of the mill conservative brainrot.

I feel so lost. Up until today I thought maybe he was different than he is, and that he wasn't just devolving into the bitter, angry, lonely old man sitting in front of his screen that his father is. He even sees the racism and bitterness in his father, and is ashamed of it, but im watching him do the exact same thing.

How am I supposed to come out as trans and be taken seriously now? Words can't describe the love I have for my dad, we have done so many cool things together. He's kind to so many people and there's so much I admire about him. And, most of all, when things aren't political and he is just him, I love being around my Dad.

I don't know if being a girl is worth losing my Dad. I'm worried it will push him to see me as "lost" to the woke mind virus in the same way I see him. He doesn't live in the same reality as me. How am I supposed to convince him that I should be taken seriously when I say I'm trans, let alone supported?

Worst and scariest yet, what if I am wrong about being trans, and this whole thing has just been a weeks long excursion in fooling myself and playing dress up? What if I go through all of the pain of losing him and have to crawl back and say "you're right, I'm not trans, I just wanted to be accepted into a community of people I thought were cool" or something. Or, worse yet, what if I get the support (even if confused) and get down the road to discover I'm not a trans woman? That also wouldn't go well.

And I understand all of the "well you don't need those people" things and the "trump didn't make anyone a bad person, he exposed how bad people are" and all that stuff. But it's still my Dad, and he was a great, kind man who worked hard to not be the bigot his father is before Trump. Now he thinks Harris is going to trans your kids and ban fossil fuels.

[cataclysmicwriting]

Will I ever make an intro I'm happy with? Who knows, the answer so far remains no skjfnesg

About me:

☆ Harrow, 26, he/they, gay and trans ☆ I work full time so writing is sporadic ☆ I use my likes as a bookmark system, to hold on to things I want to check out/add to my queue until I have time to do so ☆ This is a sideblog! I follow from @cataclysmicqueer

About my writing:

☆ I write a mix of short stories and longer wips ☆ My short stories can be read over on Vocal for free! ☆ I like to write in a variety of genres, but I can guarantee everything I write will be gay and I tend to write tragedies a lot ☆ I am always open to ask/tag games and getting to know other writers! ☆ I never know what to post in regards to my own stories, pls bear with me skjfnesge

What I want to follow:

☆ I love love love superpowers, fantasy, and sci-fi stories ☆ huge fan of found family, old/dead gods, bastardization arcs, and extensive character/world building ☆ would rlly love to connect with other writers of short stories!

My WIPs:

I have Many(tm) ideas and these aren't likely to be the only ones I talk about, just the main ones I put time/effort into. Formal intros for them coming soon-ish.

The Chaos in Justice || First Draft In Progress || Max Greenwich has just gained acceptance to the Grand Chaos Institute, home of the next generation of the world's worst supervillains. It's not long before he finds himself uncovering a plot to end the world, and he must team up with a group of heroes and villains alike to protect everyone. found family ; what it means to be good/evil ; fate vs free will

Lantern's Light (title pending) || First Draft in Progress || Sorran would be the first to admit they're not a great person, in fact, they're kinda a bitch. But when they happen to extend a bit of kindness to someone in need, it turns out the "someone" is actually an old god. An old god who has now decided Sorran is her new champion, and now they're stuck babysitting the reborn champion of the gods in some epic quest to defeat a threat to all of existence. found family ; redemption/bastardization arcs ; mix of high and modern fantasy ; parallel story arcs

??? (what are titles who knows not me) || planning stages || I don't have a proper blurb for this just yet but what to expect: homestuck-level dumbassery, video games as a plot mechanic, inspiration from things such as homestuck, genshin impact, centaurworld, and some hella world-building.

[echolipse]

1. What is your romantic/sexual orientation? Panromantic asexual 2. Are you out? To whom? I'm not even sure. I'm not hiding it but I haven't done a formal "hi this is what I am" lol. 3. How old were you when you realized you were asexual? What made you realize it? I knew it was something weird with me sexually at like 13, but I didn't realize what exactly until I learned about asexuality at the age of 20. 4. Do you identify as a part of the queer community? What communities do you identify with? Yes. Mainly just LGBTQ+ in general, but for more specific ones it'll be the asexual and trans/enby communities. 5. Tell the story of the first person you came out to. I came out to my mom as bisexual when I was 14, that's what I thought I was back then (I just knew I liked both binary genders), I didn't know there were more specific things than straight, bi, gay. I told her in an SMS from my bedroom lol. She replied that she loved me regardless. 6. Have you faced oppression because of your asexuality, whether institutional or societal? I'm not sure. 7. Who’s your favorite Doctor? (Or, do you have a favorite asexual character?) David Tennant. 8. Do you believe there should be asexual pride? What do you imagine it being like? I mean, just celebrate pride with the general LGBTQ+ movement. 9. What does being asexual mean to you? Sexual attraction is little to non-existent. 10. What have other people said about your asexuality? Not much tbh. 11. If you’re out, talk about the most accepting person you’ve come out to. If you’re not out, talk about what you would hope a coming out experience would be like. Most people in my life are very accepting of LGBTQ+ as a whole. 12. Your favorite asexual Tumblr site. Don't have any. 13. Your favorite asexual website. Don't have any. 14. Tell us about a time you met another asexual, whether in real life or online. Don't remember. 15. Your favorite asexual character/celebrity/person. I like that guy on tiktok that calls himself tiktok jesus, he's asexual and pretty funny. 16. Your favorite “asexual” book (as in, sex and/or romance are not the main focus). A good girls guide to murder. 17. Your favorite “asexual” movie. Can't decide on a favorite. 18. Tell us a funny joke about asexuality. No. 19. What do relationships mean to you? Haven't been in one in 9 years, don't even remember anymore. 20. Tell us about your partner(s). If you are not in a relationship, tell us about your best friend(s). My best friends are great. I don't know what to say, I just think they're great and I'm happy to know them. I don't have the energy to write a lot about each of them (even tho it's just 2). 21. Your favorite asexual quote. Idk, maybe the classic "I'd rather have cake" 22. What do you believe causes asexuality? No clue. What causes gayness? 23. What is your favorite asexual pride image? Probably one with a dinosaur shape colored with the ace colors or something. 24. Write something or post a picture about asexuality that upsets you. It's hard finding love... not that I tried that hard, I'm lazy and don't like people lol. 25. What is the worst argument you’ve heard against asexuality? "You're not a plant" 26. Who is your biggest ally? My best friends. 27. What is your favorite types of cake? Carrot cake. 28. What is your favorite type of pie? (Or, is pie an acceptable replacement for cake?) No. 29. Where did you first learn about asexuality? I think it was here on tumblr. 30. Tell us anything about asexuality that you want to end with. I'm tired of writing now.

[youmissedone]

“No, um, I’ve known for a while now,” K-Mart said, smiling pensively. “I just never really had the opportunity to come out before, and I was afraid that I’d be wrong somehow. Like I’d come out, but then I wouldn’t actually be trans or bi, and everyone would think I’m a liar. But then you all started calling me K-Mart instead of deadnaming me, and Claire offered to help me with voice training, and I didn’t have to wear any especially gendered clothing, and it just… clicked, I guess. I wasn’t ever wrong.”

K-Mart’s decision to come out to Carlos had been influenced by a few factors, but it was mainly because she viewed him as a father figure. His kindness and care for her rivaled her own biological family’s, and he seemed very welcoming of others and their identities. If he couldn’t accept her, then who would?

“Well,” she started, giggling a little at Carlos’ comments about being basic, “I wouldn’t call whatever you and Claire have got going on ‘basic’, but we all have our own opinions.”

The way Claire and Carlos had willingly taken K-Mart in during the worst of the apocalypse was something she’d always love them for. To some extent, she viewed them as parental figures, and they’d both cared for her as such. K-Mart wasn’t sure if either of them would’ve ever had kids if life was still normal, but the found family they’d created with the convoy was something she’d always love them for. She wondered sometimes if they’d ever consider adopting her, even if not legally. They’d both accepted her without question when she came out to them, something her biological parents would never have done.

“It’s easier being with you guys sometimes, cause I’m pretty sure my parents would’ve kicked me out if they survived any of this, so… there’s that.” K-Mart paused and swallowed hard. “I know we just met that new girl, Bella, and she said she wanted to join the convoy. She told me she was adopted, and we’re both sixteen, so I guess I just thought… if you and Claire… I probably wouldn’t have anyone to stay with, y’know, if we ever found the antivirus and things went back to normal. You’re basically like family, anyway, so I guess what I’m asking is… would you guys ever want that? Because I think I’d really like that.”

__________

“Well... you can change your mind anytime you want, who cares what anyone else thinks?” Carlos said, shrugging. “No one can tell you who you are or want for yourself, only you can. And it’s not really changing your mind, it’s self-discovery. Sometimes with a little more time and thought you realize things about yourself that you didn’t know before, or you narrow down what you want or feel. There’s nothing wrong with that at all, like you said. But I’m glad that things clicked for you. That’s got to be a great feeling, when it all comes together. You do you, ‘cause it’s a pretty cool ‘you’ to be, if you ask me,” he said with a smile.

He chuckled a bit at her assessment of his and Claire’s relationship. “Eh, we don’t put labels on anything. There isn’t a need to,” he said. Carlos wasn’t exactly sure where he stood with Claire, but he also wasn’t willing to try to ask or force a definition from her and risk making things weird between them. What they had was working, whatever it was, and he’d just as soon leave it be... unless she wanted more. “Wait, ‘we all?’ We all have our opinions?” He chuckled again. “I wasn’t aware that me and Claire were the talk of the convoy." As long as it gave them something to distract them from the fear and horror of daily life, then Carlos was fine with it. He just didn’t see what all the fuss was about.

Hearing how she thought her parents might have reacted to her if her family had survived the apocalypse, Carlos frowned, his gaze falling a bit. He didn’t understand how anyone could abandon family over something like that, especially a child. Or... young person, since K-mart was growing up quickly and was at that age where being thought of as a child wasn’t ideal. “I’m sorry to hear that. But you don’t know for sure that would’ve happened, right? And at this point, you’ll never know. So... assume the best of them and try to let it go. Don’t let what-ifs get you down, especially if there’s no way of knowing either way.”

As K-mart shyly asked if he and Claire would be interested in adopting her, Carlos turned to humor at first to help her relax, as he often did with everyone. “You just want a really cool dad. I mean, come on, admit it, I’m as cool as dads come,” Carlos said with a big grin. Getting down to business, he got a bit more serious now. “Listen, I can’t speak for Claire, so you’d have to ask her directly how she feels about it, but... you’ll always have a place with me. If you want to make it official, we don’t need to wait for an antivirus that might never come anyway. I’d be honored to adopt you. And one good thing about adopting in this day and age... we don’t have to wait for a bunch of annoying paperwork to go through,” he said, his smile lingering. “If that’s something you want, I’m all for it.”

[unclevladscorner]

Book Review/Analysis- The Orchid and the Lion

It took me a while to get through this book, but HOLY MOLY was it a good read.

Before I start- this is a highly sexually explicit novel. At it's core, it's a dystopian sci-fi, but it's also a book about relationships, queer community, sex work, and BDSM.

The plot largely revolves around Dorian Vidales and Laith Ritter. Dorian is a genderqueer gay man, fem Dom and the star sex worker at La Vie Boheme- The premier brothel on the James Baldwin space station. Located halfway between Earth and Mars, the station is a haven for LGBTQIA+ people and others who've fled oppressive Purity Laws on Earth.

Laith Ritter is a newly arrived transplant. He travels to the space station in hopes of building a new life for himself, and he hopes to connect to a relative who mysteriously dies just before the novel opens. The story largely revolves around the dual plot lines of Laith's training to be a professional sub and the investigation into the murder of his uncle, Sam Beecher.

Laith essentially lies on his resume when applying to work at La Vie Boheme, saying he's comfortable with many sex acts he's never heard of. Dorian is put in charge of Laith, and given a month to train him. Dorian; while attracted to Laith, has a difficult time with the unfamiliar feelings of falling head over high heels for the man he's now tasked to train. The budding romance is fraught with challenges as each man has their own baggage, none more so than Dorian himself.

The high points are very high, and the low points are very low. For a debut novel, Gabriel Hargrave knocks it out of the gods-damned park. I would give this book a million and one stars if I could, I think it's that great. This is going to be a long talk, dissecting some of the themes and plot of the book. WARNING: There will be spoilers ahead!

First off, I am super grateful that all the sex depicted in the book is fully consentual; and while there are moments of violence, they are handled in ways that did not trigger my own PTSD. This is a rarity for me, and I'm always glad when I can get through a sometimes difficult read without feeling re-traumatized.

I feel like the characters are portrayed in a raw, but dignified light. Dorian is a mess, he masks his feelings from himself and has an incredibly difficult time accepting both loving another person and having that love returned. Laith is relatively well composed on the outside, but he harbors deep trauma from both his military service and his years on Earth living as a stealth transgender man.

That being said, all the characters in the book feel very real and well rounded. Their hopes, dreams, trauma, and motivations all read with deep emotional sincerity. Even at Dorian's worst, I deeply sympathize with him b/c he genuinely believes he cannot be loved, and he feels the need to self sabotage his new relationship at various points for various reasons.

Laith is also deeply compelling. Hiding behind a mask of calm composure, his emotional armor is different but very parallel to Dorian's own. He finds freedom and acceptance in Dorian's training. Dorian; in spite of his objections, wants the best for Laith and never does anything without consent and regular safety checks.

Laith starts the book very ambivalent about his choice to become a sex worker, and ends the book surrounded by a family of friends and love he'd never dreamed of before. Shy at first, he slowly opens up to Dorian, the trust they build feels both unbreakable and all too fragile as the two men navigate one another's fears and trauma.

Laith's ability to have agency over his own body; to name it and refer to it in terms he's comfortable with, and to choose how in what way he has sex (Which is admittedly a LOT of ways lololol), is deeply satisfying. I feel like even in the realm of transmasculine penned works, trans men and transmasculine bodies are still often filtered through a cis feminine lens. This book; and Experience Points By N. A. Melamed, are two I've read that I deeply connect with as the authors embrace their own deeply personal trans experiences to pen very real feeling and authentic transmasculine characters. It makes me feel seen and proud of my own transmasculine body, emotional scars and all.

In spite of everything that happens, Laith and Dorian's deep bonds keep them together through both internal and external conflicts. The love between them is raw and and feels delicate at times; but in spite of this, they find a way to navigate the difficult situations they find themselves in and back to one another in a very deeply real way.