#and then as an adult luigi finds his way back into the world and has to serve bowser and fight the mushroom kingdom to survive

[chloecherrysip]

breaking news: local woman goes to the movie theater and somehow DOESN'T see the mario movie again for the millionth time? who IS she??????

[batneko]

okay SO, childhood friends idea inspired by a suggestion from @hyperfixatingonbowuigisohard and the Yoshi's Island games. I still don't have a story exactly but I do have a lot of Thoughts.

Mario and Luigi are around three or four years old, old enough to talk but not to really articulate what's happening or how they're feeling. It's during a time when the parents think grandma is watching them and grandma thinks the parents decided to take them after all, and when they get home everything seems fine so the adults don't bother to compare notes. But we're getting ahead of ourselves.

Bowser is a couple years older, and small kids develop so fast that most wouldn't want to play with one much younger ("that's a baby!!!") but he's so desperate for a friend even close to his own age that he jumps at the change to spend time with this strange child that stumbled into his castle.

But... little Bowser has been so spoiled by Kamek and the other servants raising him that he has no idea how to play nicely. Luigi is terrified of him at first and starts bawling the moment Bowser "orders" him to play. For the first time in his short life, Bowser has a problem that can't be solved by yelling, crying, OR throwing things. He has to control his temper and learn to - what's it called again? - share.

Despite that the week that little Luigi spends with him is the happiest Bowser has ever been, and even that short amount of time has such an impact on his personality that he almost seems like a different person by the end. He accidentally bumps into Kamek and says "sorry" without being prompted and Kamek is so shocked he has to have a lie-down.

But at the end of that week, little Mario suddenly shows up with a pack of yoshis who seem to know where the boys belong, and Kamek knows it's not right to just keep a lost child. He also knows that there's no way Bowser is going to agree to let his first-ever friend go away and maybe never see him again, so Kamek smuggles Luigi out while Bowser is asleep and tells him his family came to get him. It's technically true.

Bowser is devastated. He screams, cries, throws things, and finally begs, but there's nothing anyone can do, Luigi is already gone. He's miserable for months, but eventually the sadness turns into anger. If his friend wanted to come back, why doesn't he?

Time passes. The memories fade. He's left with equal parts fascination by and resentment of humans, and the subconscious belief that if you give the people you love any chance to leave you, they will.

Meanwhile Mario and Luigi have gone home, and both of them are suddenly talking a lot about dinosaurs. That's not unusual, kids love dinosaurs, the parents figure they saw a cool book or movie with one of their cousins. But while Mario seems to think of dinosaurs as big animals that you run around with, Luigi keeps asking when he can go see "the dinosaur" again. He gets upset when his parents don't know what he means, but he keeps asking, again and again, for months. Every time they think he forgot he asks again, and no movie or museum visit or plush toy seems to be the answer.

He draws a lot of spiky green balls in this time. Eventually the parents decide that "the dinosaur" must be his imaginary friend and try to play along. It doesn't work, Luigi is still upset, but he's young and eventually he really does forget.

Years later family members will still sometimes bring up "Luigi's imaginary friend the dinosaur" as a cute anecdote. It's a little embarrassing, but he doesn't mind it too much.

And then it's twenty-plus years later and Mario and Luigi find themselves in a world that's full of adventure and magic and - yes - dinosaurs. There's a feeling of déjà vu but there are bigger things to worry about at the moment, and neither of them have any real reason to think they've been to this world before.

The first meeting doesn't go well. Bowser kidnaps Peach, the bros come to her rescue, and it ends in a big fight. Bowser does have a moment's pause when he first sees the bros, but Mario takes that opportunity to attack him and it's downhill from there.

There are several more clashes as time goes on. Sometimes it's just Mario, sometimes it's both of them, but after enough meetings people start to notice... Bowser controls his temper better around Luigi.

At first Mario thought it was just because Bowser hates him specifically, but no, other people have noticed it too. For some reason when Luigi is there Bowser is actually capable of showing restraint. Not even Peach brings that out of him. It's weird.

(Mario does wonder if Bowser kind of has a thing for his brother, but he can't bring himself to say it out loud.)

Luigi isn't scared of Bowser either, not the way he probably should be, given the whole giant monster/serial kidnapper thing. It's too awkward to ask Bowser why he's different around Luigi, but Mario asks Luigi why he's not afraid, and Luigi can't put his finger on it. He just Knows that Bowser is more bark than bite. He's not sure why.

So that's where things stand; Bowser and Luigi are both more comfortable with each other than anything about their personalities or situation seems to justify, and nobody knows why.

...Except Kamek who, as the only adult in the situation, figures out who the bros are almost immediately and promptly decides to Keep His Damn Mouth Shut. That reveal is not going to lead to good things for him.

[istadris]

( @multicolour-ink I don't know if you'll like or hate this xoxo)

*

There's a world where Mario never became a plumber.

There were two children, always side by side, one bravely taking the lead, the other following the best he could despite getting tired more and more quickly everyday.

Until he couldn't follow anymore.

Mario remembers the grown ups talking in hushed voices. His brother's bed, where he wasn't supposed to sleep on, but sneaked in anyway. The doctors trying their best (and little Mario thinking it's not enough, do better!). The many, many visits to the hospital. The waiting. Their parent's tears. The silence.

Most of all, he remembers feeling

Helpless.

He became quiet and focused. He started reading. And reading. He stopped going on childish adventures. He wanted to understand what happened. Wanted to prove to everyone he could have done something, anything, if he had been in the adults' place. He read about his brother's illness, then about what came close to it, then another one. He read and studied and worked, never sparing himself any rest, until he became a doctor, and then kept going, because there was always more to do.

He's so nice, this Dr Mario, the patients often say, so gentle and caring, always doing his best for the others, always trying to cheer them up and keep hope.

The hospital staff say the same things. Nice, determined, caring, funny, that's how they describe him, but the ones closest to him add in a whisper and terribly lonely, isn't he ?

*

There's a world where Luigi never became a plumber.

There were two children, always side by side, one as curious as afraid, the other always braving danger to protect them both.

Until one day, bravery wasn't enough.

Luigi wants to remember what happened. But everytime he tries -all he feels is the pain, the fear, and the words coward, coward, you were weak, you ran away, you left him behind-

His anger grew under his fear, his desire to make them pay, all of them, to make them respect him, so no one dared to mess with him ever again. He became bitter and crafty, scrapped by to survive and get back up everytime he was kicked down, again, again, again. He fell in with other like-minded individuals, people hurt and angry and determined to make the world suffer.

He hid his shame under a mask. He buried the name of the coward under nicknames. He disguised his fear under arrogance.

I'm the best, I'm the most promising element of the gang, I'm number one, he claims loudly. I don't need anyone.

(A familiar face keeps showing up in his designs and blueprints, and he keeps tearing them apart).

*

One day, in Mr L's world, he is on the run from the police. He flees through the sewers, finds strange passages to sneak into, and comes across the biggest pipe he has ever seen. When he stands in front of it, mesmerised, it suddenly pulses, electricity crackling through the air, and in a couple of seconds, he's gone.

On day, in Dr Mario's world, there's a flooding near the hospital. Dr Mario is on his way to work when he sees a cat swept away by the water, prompting him to rush after it through the sewers to get it to safety. When he tries to get back to the surface, he comes by a massive pipe and can't look away from it, even as the air shifts into warmth before suddenly sucking him in.

*

They land in a strange, unknown world, filled with bright colors and magic.

But they don't care about any of that. The first thing both notice is a face they haven't seen outside of dreams or nightmares since childhood.

*

Where do they go from here?

[peaches2217]

During the pregnancy I imagine that Peach of course sings to her baby to calm herself and the baby down. Just imagine her sitting in the garden while rubbing her own belly and singing nursery rhymes. And I am asking you, do you have any headcanons about this as well?

Oh-ho, don’t even get me started on the role singing plays in the whole ordeal. Too late! Ya got me started~

Mario’s a really good singer, but for one reason or another he just doesn’t feel comfortable singing around anybody except Luigi or Peach; even then, he doesn’t sing around them much at all. But Peach adores his voice and will occasionally attempt to cajole him into singing for her. He plays along and makes a big show of resisting before ultimately giving her that song she wants, dancing around with her and being generally overdramatic, and it’s a great deal of fun!

But on very rare occasions, he’ll sing for her without provocation. It’s always during moments of quiet intimacy, as though his heart’s just too full and it’ll burst unless he pours it out in song, or whenever she’s under strain and there’s no immediate way he can help her other than to comfort her. And those songs are soft, low, mellow, and nine times out of ten in Italian. When he sings for her like that, all feels right with the world.

Her first real bout of morning sickness sees her violently ill at four in the morning, and Mario leaves her just long enough to send a summon for the head nurse. Peach is curled up on the tiles of the darkened bathroom, and Mario returns with a blanket, sets her head in his lap, and sings softly to her as he strokes her hair. While Mario internally panics over her condition, Peach is wrapped in the warmth of his voice; she feels light and drowsy, like he’s cocooning her in pure comfort, and for a while all of her nausea falls to the wayside.

He does it again that night, laying in bed together after finding out that he’s going to be a father. She can’t understand the words, but the melody is simple and repetitive, and she quickly realizes he’s singing a lullaby. It’s enough to make her cry.

In the coming weeks, she asks him to teach her the same lullabies his mother sang to him and Luigi as children. So he does! He’ll introduce a new one every night until he runs out of lullabies he actually remembers (it HAS been a while since he was a kid). The English lullabies she of course picks up quickly; she’s particularly fond of the one with the diamond ring and looking glass, because, as Mario affectionately points out, showering a baby with expensive gifts it can’t even use is 100% something she would do. The Italian lullabies take more time, so he’ll start by translating them line-by-line (during which he realizes for the first time just how morbid some of them are…) and then singing it slowly so Peach can join in and mimic his intonation.

And since lullabies can get pretty repetitive, he’ll take regular breaks to sing different songs to her so she doesn’t go crazy. The truth is, she could never grow tired of his voice, no matter how many times he repeats the same handful of stanzas… but she certainly won’t object, because he’s sang for her more in the past month than he has in all the time she’s known him.

It feels a bit silly when she thinks about it, two grown adults singing children’s songs back and forth to each other all night. But those songs become part of their daily repertoire, and every time Mario starts sleepily murmuring one with his head on her chest and a hand on her stomach, or every time she approaches him in the middle of the day just to ask if she’s pronouncing a line correctly; every time she hears him humming about Fra’ Simon in the shower and then groaning about it being stuck in his head, and every time he tries to surprise her in the garden after their duties are complete for the day, only to find her singing the same song while rubbing soothing patterns over her belly; they both fall a little bit harder for one another.

[multicolour-ink]

All your headcanons of the Bros as babies has made me crave content of them at all ages growing up. Being each other’s wingman when the other develops a crush. Bullies quickly learning they better not mess with Luigi or else they have Mario to deal with and they do NOT want that

Ah thank you 😊 I'm happy you like my headcanons; I gushed a lot when writing them and I know some people find that stuff strange...but I get fascinated when media portrays such a deep, beautiful, and healthy bond between characters. Especially one that is established to have developed from when they were so young...

It is a shame that we don't see them as kids, or even teens in the movie. Maybe Nintendo just didn't want to go that far yet they were still happy for Illumination to create an entire family for them... but it would've been nice to see more of Mario defending Luigi throughout their whole lives, not just as a baby and then an adult. Sorry, but in my opinion, it just adds more weight to the relationship when you see them in all stages of life.

But yes, Mario would of course get into fights with bullies picking on Luigi. More than often getting a black eye or bruised ribs. The number of times Luigi had to clean Mario's wounds, crying over how he's useless and can't even defend himself, let alone his big brother. And Mario wiping his brother's tears away and saying (with such sincerity) that he would take a hit for Luigi, because he wants to keep his little bro safe no matter what. They may be the same age, but Mario can't stand to sit by and let him get hurt or sad. That's been the vow he made since they came out the womb.

And yes, they would totally be each other's wingmen once they got old enough for dating 😉 Luigi less so, as Mario would've been a little more confident. I certainly don't see him as smooth as Danny Zuko; he would certainly need a bit of a nudge. But once he does, he asks them out straight away.

Luigi, even with all the nudging from Mario, would take about a week or two to even ask anyone out on a date. And then when Luigi eventually does, he sidles up to them shyly, places a bouquet of flowers in their hands, then blurts out "Will you go out with me?!"

Then he's halfway across the sports court before anyone else can process what he just said.

- - -

Oh! You mentioning Mario and Luigi being each other's wingmen also reminded me of this scene (one of my favourites) from the 1993 movie, when Mario helps Luigi ask Daisy out.

For context: Daisy is the princess in this movie, not Peach. And she was born in another world, but raised on Earth and became an archaeologist.

When they first meet her, and Luigi is goofing up his intro, Mario makes his hilarious reaction

And then when Luigi clearly isn't getting any further, Mario steps in

"What my brother is trying to say, is that he doesn't know what to say!"

Even though the brothers are different ages in this movie (with Mario being more the father figure) I can totally see 2023 Mario doing this! In fact I may attempt to do this as a redraw someday 👀

Then after they drop her back at the dig site, Mario feeds Luigi words to tell Daisy, so the latter can ask her out to dinner.

After they part ways with her, Mario and Luigi have this funny exchange (again, another moment I can totally see the 2023 Mario and Luigi having!)

"What would you do without your big brother?"

"I'd like to give it a shot and find out..."

"Ah come on!"

"I was just about to ask her that!"

"You weren't about to ask her nothing, you was gonna let her go!"

- - -

No matter in what universe - big bro Mario is always the wingman!

[bowserssupermariopartylaugh]

rambles about my messy af bowuigi yoshi's island au thing, at the "behest" of @maxium-defense-luigi i have more bits and bobs but tried to "summarize" the vague major points and failed 😭

Basically, it's yoshi's island's premise where kamek kidnaps baby luigi, but ends up taking him in as his ward. So now bowser and luigi grow up together and become each other's best friend.

But remember, kid mario and the yoshies are still looking for luigi. When they finally manage to defeat kamek, they take luigi with them, to "rescue" him. But, for the most part, what they've done is tear luigi away from the only family he's ever known.

And taken away Bowser's only friend.

From here, the story can somewhat fall in line with the movie premise. In that, the yoshies hide the human children away, sending them to a world where they better blend in. A world no one else seems to know of.

But kamek doesn't know that. He wages a war against the yoshies, razing their island in search of luigi. To no avail. He extends his search to other kingdoms, and Bowser grows up knowing only that luigi was taken from him—

—and that he /despises/ the boy in the red cap.

Moving forward in time to when bowser ascends to the throne, you can only imagine how someone like bowser only doubles the search efforts. He tears through kingdom to kingdom in search of luigi, and leaves destruction in his wake. He gains a reputation as a war monger, the world fears him, and he intends to keep it that way.

Until the day bowser's troops capture a human fumbling through the kingdom. Because bowser's hopes and dreams of a happy reunion with his invaluable friend are instantly dashed when luigi /doesn't remember him./ All Luigi seems to do is cower from bowser as if he were a dangerous beast, who won't let luigi go back home, and luigi /doesn't want to stay./

But bowser has gone his whole life looking for luigi, to have him by his side /always,/ and he won't let go without a fight.

Luigi seems real preoccupied with running back to some "Mario" guy, and lo and behold, bowser's scouts discover that the stubborn mushroom kingdom has also received a visitor.

A man in a /red cap./

The main timeline difference here is that in yoshis island, you rescue luigi relatively quickly. But in order for the au to work, the yoshies cant find and rescue luigi until he's been missing for like a few years. Oof.

Theres so many tropes i wanna cram into this thing likeee. I love to imagine that bowser has basically gastby'd luigi, ykno? Where luigi, like daisy, has almost become more of a concept than an actual person in bowser's head. And that luigi would just conveniently not care about bowser having terrorized numerous kingdoms for "luigi's" sake, and that he'd just /agree/ to stay with bowser forever and ever etc. even tho its completely unrealistic and frankly ridiculous

Ive made a short post about this before, where i wanted to explain that i would want to do these different phases of their lives as separate parts, so that I could focus on the different stages and their different tones without it seeming too disjointed for one story. Like i rly wanna dedicate a whole story just to kid bowuigi bc guh theyre so precious 😭

And clearly i want to cram beauty and the beast in there. I love the idea of bowser instantly crushing on now-adult luigi, but he can't make any progress bc bowser has also let himself degrade into the monster the world views him as.

Its also fun to consider this like, thing of how /kamek/ was the one who started this thing of marking the yoshies as mortal enemies of the koopas, moreso than any other kingdom or race. And so bowser grows up in a kingdom at war, and just kinda absorbs that mentality and those practices. It's kinda all he knows.

(It also just doesn't help that kid bowser was HELLA traumatized by having luigi kidnapped from his own home /right in front of him,/ as kamek hid them both together in a saferoom. Likewise, luigi is def fucked up from being kidnapped but whereas bowser explodes from all of his issues, luigi is a perfect embodiment of repressed/suppressed trauma. 🥲)

And remember, mario was basically raised a la tarzan by the yoshies (hell yeah feral jungle boy mario), and luigi is mario's brother. So now there's these two heavily feuding groups, and bowser goes and falls for someone he shouldn't associate with. Yes, it's romeo and juliet, dammit.

I have yet to watch howl's moving castle but (excuse me if im butchering your special interest 😭), i feel like this plot is also vaguely similar to that movie.

Its just fun. Like. Luigi's kidnapped as a baby by the bad guys, the good guys rescue him after like five years but it's basically kidnapping at this point, so whos in the right and whos in the wrong, etc

Ugh this is why i dont write this story lmao, im trying too hard 💀💀💀 this idea has clearly been rotting in my head too long and getting out of hand 😵‍💫

[inklyqueen]

Literally all the critics are so up in their egos

Also Spoiler warnings for the Mario movie because I'm crying and yk it's opening day I'm not that kind of bitch

I don't think many of them understand that they've got it made rn, and they've never experienced the world some of us are living in

And I don't mean it in a mental health sense or anything, I mean in an actual survival as an adult sense

I was literally surprised by how much I related to Mario specifically. He's the oldest. I'm the oldest of six (under a technicality, two of them are my dad's girlfriend's kids but yk). I'm sure his parents have preached that he needs to take care of and watch out for his younger brother (I'm assuming they're still twins in this universe, Mario was always the older twin in the games and other lore), and I've been preached that too. I'm the same way with my siblings as Mario is with Luigi. Throw trash at my sister, see that happens. "The more you fuck around, the more you're gonna find out." And at the end of the day, my parents will be only in my memories at some point, and all I'll have left is my siblings, granted if I never get married, have kids, etc (God willing I hope, not the point though) It seems to me that Mario is incredibly aware of that too, that one day they'll both be at an age where it's literally only him and Luigi and that they may literally be the only one the other has.

What also struck me was the set-up they showed with the boys. They still live with Mom and Dad, still in their childhood bedroom(s?), just trying to find their footing, I assume they want to be independent of their parents. They put their life savings into a commercial to get their company off the ground. I'm assuming they didn't have very much in the first place, especially from the speech their father gave about how "you can't just give up a steady job for a dream," and how Mario (at least specifically I'm assuming) can't hold down a job in the first place. How he's the one that's bringing Luigi down, as if Luigi can't make a decision for himself, and Mario's like his legal guardian or something. It very much seems to me that they've literally leaned on each other for almost everything more than their own parents, and that's screaming volumes for me.

I still live with my parents, and I get the same grief as well over how I haven't gotten it all figured out still. C*vid was zero help, I wasn't even a year out of high school when it hit, I was just starting college and things were not going very well. I'm just now figuring out my degree program, what I want, trying to get my career off the ground, and getting money back in the bank. I can't afford rent, God no, and I'm blessed to have a job that covers tuition now.

But it seems to me that critics don't understand that. For some reason they want this incredible fleshed-out character arc, plot and overreaching plot, Oscar and Emmy winning from day one piece, and besides the fact that this is technically intended for children, some of the ones I've read are literally making just under upper-to-upper class pay and lifestyles by being that judgemental. They don't have to worry about gas (or the electric bills if they have an electric car) in the tank or food on the table or making rent. One said that they "failed to give Mario a personality" (paraphrasing), when literally I'm seeing myself and my survival struggles in this short moustachioed plumber with older sibling anxiety.

Which, I'm pretty sure he's got a mild touch of GAD, or maybe that's me projecting. I'm not a licensed anything. Also added bonus points because I'm shorter than all of the siblings that are at an age to have actual height. One of my siblings is in high school rn and she's taller than me by a good eight inches. I'm six years older than her.

I'm literally out here doing the best I can with a $200 Insurance payment coming and $80 in the bank.

So yeah. Mario is a really good character.

So thankful for him.

[forthedancingandthethriving]

Fleeting Sands Arc

The New Pet

Lily gets a pet hognose snake after begging SMG4&3 for one for a while. She and Lil Coding enjoy spending time with it until Boopkins accidentally releases it from its enclosure. This leads to the trio having to find it before the adults figure out that it's lose.

Mario goes for a glass of water

It's hot. Like, desert levels of hot in the Mushroom Kingdom. No one knows why. Mario goes to get some water, but it turns out the plumbing isn't working! He has to do his job for once, and it goes as wondrously as you'd expect.

Mario goes to the Desert

Thanks to Mario pissing off Kamek, he, Luigi, Tari, and Saiko have all ended up in the damn desert of all places. With no easy way back until the others realize they're gone, so they decide to find some place to rest and not die of heatstroke.

As they make their way through the desert, they see bases for pillars that seem to have been ripped away, taken by some unforseen being or force. They eventually come across a worn down and faceless statue of a king, on its back in the sand. The pedestal that it once stood upon long gone.

Everyone is rightfully confused by this and slightly offput as well, but there's no time to question it, as Domain and Forum have arrived to collect them. They decide not to question it, though, and are grateful to head home.

Lily's Lessons in Blackmail

Lily turns out to, unknowingly, have a lot of blackmail on everyone due to being the quiet, unsuspecting child of the whole gang (at least formerly). Bob realizes this when she casually mentions to him one day something about Boopkins anime obsession even he didn't know about. Cue her showing her all the blackmail she has on everyone without even realizing.

This quickly leads into him teaching her the wonderful world of blackmail, where you can use it to get what you want. He teaches her how to use blackmail (namely on Wario and Waluigi, because they've been setting up scams on his terf again).

It's actually a positive bonding experience between the two, with Bob actually being a good influence and reminding her not to do it all the time. But she should absolutely do it to get back at those who wrong her.

Mario the Babysitter

Mario's got to watch over Lil Coding, Lily, Jubjub, Boopkins, and Cody for the day! Normally, this would be fine, considering he has matured a lot in this au. However, Lil Coding found the catnip that was hidden is causing absolute mayhem around the castle while the others are out. He attempts to call Antivirus and CPU to have either of them help, but both say that, unfortunately, they have some really pressing matters to attend to and that they can't help despite wanting to.

After the group manages to get Lil Coding under control.. the end shifts abruptly to Antivirus, CPU, and Crash entering a desert-like domain, where the wind is howling.. before the episode ends.

A Glitchy Tale

The kids decide that, for their fun today, they'll have Lil Coding infiltrate the Adminspace archives and find out about all the viruses and over enemies that have been dealt with. It's presented in the form of a story book, with each virus defeat told (except for Re: Eternity, because Lily still has trauma from that) and then they get to.. a Virus with no name. It's title is blank.

It's described as a giant serpent, with piercing yellow eyes not even the darkest depths could hide. Its silver scales would glint in the sun of the universe it would then consume and destroy. It was said that it was impossible to contain, until one day.. it vanished. No one knew what happened to it, and search parties were sent out but it was never found.

It's commented on how ominous that is.

We get another abrupt ending change, with the Crash, CPU, and Antivirus, all dodging various attacks from an unknown being in the desert domain. They're all in their bird forms, and worryingly, they're panicking. And it's made apparent why, when Crash mentions that since Antivirus and him both just went through and update, they are nowhere near their normal power level and can't fight. Unfortunately, whatever is attacking them won't let them reach the exit.

The trio dodge some more until the attacks begin to come from the air, and they begin flying closer to the ground. Unfortunately.. this was a trick. Whatever was attacking them had prefired some shots long before, and now they were finally coming down.

The trio revert back to their normal holograms.. just in time for a shadow to shoot over them, and for the three to realize in absolute horror, they were tricked. The shadow shoots down and cuts to black.

It then shows Ozymandias, slithering towards the exit, saying, "I am Ozymandias, king of kings. All those who try to contain me are fools, and you three are no different."

Missing 3

There's a bit of panic in the Adminspace, because of the fact that they have LOST THREE VERY IMPORTANT ADMIMS AND NO ONE CAN FIND THEM.

Considering the recent track record that's been happening, there are a lot of Admins out searching for the three (but we only focus on the ones we've been introduced to). The tone of the episode gets progressively more panicked before Lag and Buffer lands in the Mario universe, both really really hoping that the trio is here and just something is wrong with their location transmitters.

Only for more despair to set it when it's confirmed that, no, none of the three were here. Just as the gang goes to inquire more, Ping arrives with a badly beat Umbra, with Abyssal not for behind.

They found CPU, Antivirus, and Crash! But.. the trio is being held hostage by a giant virus snake that's currently rampaging through a universe? What's worse? It has them in some strange orbs on its body, draining them of their power, and none of them know how much longer those three will last.

Movie: Fleeting Time and Falling Sands

(A WOTFI wouldn't work because,, Ozymandias just wouldn't agree to it-)

Understandably, everyone is freaking out over this. Moreso when they realize that, aside from the one file that Lil Coding read once, there is nothing on Ozymandias. But Umbra is able to tell them that the virus did say something about how dragging it "down to that infernal prison won't work." Giving the terrifying realization that Ozymandias can't be contained in Computer Hell.

Everyone ends up agreeing that there must have been somewhere that the virus was being contained. So, the Admins capable of fighting decide to head off the universe to fight and stall for time while the Hologram Trio, the SMGs, and Umbra head out to try and find where Ozymandias has been kept. The rest of the gang stay behind, mostly in case something happens while everyone is gone.

A good portion of the movie is split between the Admins fighting Ozymandias and the other group trying to figure out where the hell the virus was trapped. Thankfully, they do eventually find the separate prison, but they're running out of time. Antivirus, Crash, and CPU aren't looking too well, and Buffer surmises that they only have a certain amount of time until all three are drained of their power, and Ozymandias decides to stop torturing them.

As the Admins lead Ozymandias back to its prison, they try various ways to free the trio, but to no avail. However, Abyssal ends up getting a lucky shot and breaks the three free.. only for Ozymandias to notice and immediately shoot down, intent on eating the Admins whole.

Just barely, though, Buffer and Abyssal manage to grab the trio and get away from an increasingly incensed Ozymandias. However, it's Buffer that realizes that the virus really wants them, and it's then a plan is made.

The other group quickly use their abilities to change the scenery of Ozymandias's prison, changing it to look like an unsuspecting universe. And thankfully, it works. They're able to lure the virus in and get back out. It's not all sunshine and rainbows, though, as everyone is able to witness Ozymandias crack the walls of its prison.

It may not be able to escape its own code, but it can certainly weaken it. Ping and Abyssal take it upon themselves to do their best to reinforce the protection of the walls keeping Ozymandias in, while everyone else focuses on Crash, CPU, and Antivirus. The three will live, thankfully, but at the current moment, they're very weak and are going to need a lot of time to recover.

Movie ends with a flash forward to a few days later. Antivirus is playing with some of the kids, and CPU and Crash are watching. The trio decided to spend most of their recovery in the Mario universe because, despite all the story chaos that happens, it is actually pretty peaceful by SMG standards.

Though, when asked if they know who locked Ozymandias up, all three avoid the question. They'd rather not remember the first time they nearly lost their lives. Thank you very much. And while Ozymandias is still very much a threat, its containment is still being updated.. it's not a threat now. So everyone's content to take a moment to breathe.

[agentnico]

The Super Mario Bros. Movie (2023) Review

Why is it that so many Hollywood movies these days have to include the same exact 80′s songs like ‘Take On Me’ and ‘Holding Out for a Hero’? There’s such a massive catalogue of superb 80s songs, yet for some reason these are used 24/7. They’re good songs, don’t get me wrong, but play same a million times and they lose their magic. 

Plot: A Brooklyn plumber named Mario travels through the Mushroom Kingdom with a princess named Peach and an anthropomorphic mushroom named Toad to find his brother, Luigi, and to save the world from a ruthless fire-breathing Koopa named Bowser.

So from the beginning one of the more controversial elements of this film’s announcement was the casting of Chris Pratt as the voice of Mario. For one, Mr Pratt is not Italian, nor do I believe he has any family members or ancestors that are connected to the Italian culture. He also is not from Brooklyn either, where Mario and Luigi are supposed to have their plumbing business at, so again, questionable choice. He’s also got the most generic everyday guy type voice, hence why he previously voiced Emmet from The Lego Movie, cause that entire character’s shtick was that he was ordinary, regular and in no way special individual. As for Mario, well he’s a very Italian sounding chap, with the “mamma-mia”s and the “let’s a go”s and the “I’ve got a familia”s.... Look, Mario is Italian. Luigi is Italian. Why are they being voiced by Chris Pratt and Charlie Day? Cause turns out, the writers cared zero to nothing about any reason or consistency within this film, as I am here to report that The Super Mario Bros. Movie is a mindless shameless cash grab.

The story? There is none. The narrative thread line is so thin that its pointless to talk about. The jokes? Not there. Well, they are there but they aren’t funny. And yes, I am aware that some of the humour is aimed primarily at children, and in fact kids as whole will have a ball with this movie. But making a Mario movie, the fanbase of which is made up mostly of grown up adults that grew up with the Nintendo brand and have a humongous nostalgia factor for the property, you’d think the studio would try to make a movie that’s appropriate for both kids and adults. Harkening back to 2014′s The Lego Movie, that film managed to appease audiences of all ages with both silly humour but also a solid story and enough pop culture references to appease adults who grew up building Lego. The Super Mario Bros. Movie on the other hand is simply children’s humour beginning to end, and like a thousand references and Easter Eggs thrown in from the original games that serve no other purpose other than “oh look, there’s that thing we’ve seen before!”. And as much as my heart thumped in excitement when Mario’s ringtone in the film was revealed to be the Nintendo GameCube theme song, it still doesn’t take away from the fact that at its core the movie is empty. There’s no substance to any of it. 

Visually I will say the movie does look great. The animators of Illumination as always deliver a colourful and eye-popping world, with the Mushroom Kingdom being fully realised in all its fun visual flair, and the characters from the games all being animated wonderfully. The music score too pays homage to Mario’s original themes whilst also in-keeping with the movie’s action. So from a technical standpoint the movie is well made, but from a creative side its got nothing.

At the end of the day, me and my friend both agreed that we were bored out of our minds throughout the entire movie, and many times were closing to falling asleep. Granted, we had a meal at the local pub prior and each had a pint alongside it, but a single pint does not knock someone out unless they’re flat out bored - which we were. Like, Chris Pratt wasn’t even that bad as Mario. He was just okay. All the voice cast are just okay. Jack Black makes for a solid Bowser, however them forcing Black to constantly sing that stupid unfunny Peaches song did grind my gears. The movie is 100% for kids, and there are nostalgic elements to it all, but I do believe that Illumination and Nintendo should have followed more in The Lego Movie’s footsteps and targeted the film for audiences of all ages. Should have had Phil Lord and Chris Miller produce, let’s be honest. I’m just going to go rewatch Puss in Boots: The Last Wish again - now that’s an animated movie that was way better than expected!!

Overall score: 3/10

[sarahjtv]

BNHA Chapter 309 Spoiler Thoughts: Izuku and Inko Midoriya, and Some More Things Along The Way

The chapter leaks are here again!  Thanks to all the people on Twitter and here on Tumblr for providing us with scans and translations.  This chapter helps explain some things that a lot of us were wondering about.  Sadly, there’s still no Bakugo, or Shoto, or any other UA kids really; they’re only in flashbacks.  But, we do get to see what All Might and the Top 3 Heroes (Endeavor, Hawks, and Best Jeanist) are up to, so that’s something.  Anyway, remember to take what I say with a grain of salt until the official translations come out on Sunday:

The chapter starts a few minutes after Deku beat Muscular.  He’s flying through the air taking an unconscious Muscular tied up in his Black Whip.  The other Ketsubusu Academy students from the Lisence Exam see him too.  Thankfully the stubborn civilians from 2 chapters ago are willing to help Yo Shindo recover in exchange for not listening moving to the school shelters.  Also, Shindo’s barely conscious, but he does actually remember Deku.  He’s just not the same Deku as before.  Not much for me to say here except that I wonder if Shindo’s going to help spread the word about Deku’s actions.  Not just to his classmates, but I wonder if the words’ going to get out to the news and UA.  Actually, word might not even get that far since Shindo was only one of the few people in that exam that really even interacted with Deku...

Deku hands Muscular over to the police for them to take care off.  He also makes sure to cover himself up in Smokescreen to hide his identity.  So, Deku really is working in the shadows here.  It is best that the public doesn’t know what Deku is doing so that the LoV don’t track him down.  My man’s really going down the Batman route.  Oh, I also have to admire Deku’s smartphone here kept in this steel case.  I was going to say it’s a burner phone, but burner phones break easily for a reason and this one clearly doesn’t.  Maybe it’s a special one that can’t be tracked down.    

And we finally get to see All Might again!  He is actively working with Deku instead of just not knowing where his protege is.  He’s wearing casual clothes (jacket, jeans, sunglasses, the works) when he meets up with Deku in an alleyway.  I’m honestly glad that All Might is still supervising Deku.  I mean, Deku on his own would’ve been badass, but when you’re going up against people like AFO and Shigaraki, you’re going to need some help.  Especially when laying low.  Even with supervision, I still think Deku counts as a vigilante b/c I don’t think his license works if he’s not at UA.  I will believe this unless proven otherwise.  

It’s explained that the “wrapping” on Deku’s arms are actually gauntlets called “Mid-Gauntlets”, which are what are helping hold Deku’s arms together.  And they are VERY similar to the gauntlets that Melissa Shield from Two Heroes gave Deku.  Deku even says that All Might ordered them from the USA before travel restrictions were put in place.  I know that it’s only implied, but there’s no doubt in my mind that Deku’s new gauntlets were made by Melissa.  Even if you want to doubt it, at this point, Two Heroes (and by extension Heroes Rising and probably the upcoming 3rd movie, World Heroes Mission) are canon.  Honestly, I’m cool with it.  I liked Melissa and I’m glad her presence is still around (she was even in a Team-Up Mission chapter with Hatsume).  I do wonder if we’re ever going to see her in the main story.  It would be nice to see Melissa again.

The gauntlets are test samples and are used to enhance endurance.  All Might says that they can’t withstand 100% of OFA yet.  Which means that Deku actually beat Muscular with less than 100% unlike their first fight where Deku had to use over 100% just to knock him out.  So, does this mean that, say, Deku’s current 45% is stronger than his 100+% back in the Forest Camp?  Or maybe it was just the combo of moves and strategy rather then Deku just punching his way through things.

Small detail, but All Might’s phone goes off with that “I AM HERE” ringtone we heard before and Deku comments that this particular one is from All Might’s Silver Age TV Special!  It’s such a small thing, but I love that Deku still has that All Might fanboy in him despite everything 💚!  Somethings truly never change.

And back to the Top 3: Endeavor, Hawks, and Best Jeanist!  Endeavor and Best Jeanist are teaming up to kick a villain’s ass while Hawks is talking to All Might on the phone.  It looks like Hawks got a few costume changes particularly his visor/glasses which look more boxy than they did before if that makes sense.  Oh, and they’re also helping All Might work with Deku.  Makes sense since all three vowed to help take down Dabi earlier and Shigaraki and AFO definitely extend from that.

Deku’s Danger Sense is going off, so he’s probably going to check out any danger he can find in case it’s the LoV.  I do wonder if that harms Deku still.  It was said that it felt like a stabbing in his head and it must’ve been bad enough for the 4th OFA Holder to live in the forest away from society.  Man, I really hope our boy is ok (I know he’s not really, let me have this).

But yeah, Hawks (still wingless, but with a nice little undercut btw😳) explains that Deku's afraid of dragging other people in his battles like All Might.  Hawks also goes on to say that it’s best to take the initiative in taking down AFO and Shigaraki rather than waiting for them to appear all powered up.  He also wants All Might to keep supporting him despite the difficult position he’s in (remember that All Might’s technically Qurikless again and can’t really fight on his own).  It makes sense for them to go after the Villains again while they can.  If Deku fought Shigaraki while Shigaraki was at full strength, Deku would lose easily.  Even at 75%, Shigaraki was able to kill and injure A LOT of people, and Deku was lucky to even make it out there alive.  They need to find Shigaraki SOON!  

Flashback to Central Hospital before Deku jumped UA ship!  Recover Girl and Central Hospital’s high-tech were responsible for many of the patience recovering quickly and being discarged.  Deku was just there a little longer than the others.  So, we can assume that all our UA kids and some notable heroes made it out alive after being treated.  Still don’t know what happened to some people like Tamaki and Fat Gum tho 😭.  

All Might and Deku’s mom, Inko (thank god she’s ok), are by Deku’s bedside as his casts are taken off.  Deku’s doctor (who looks like Super Mario/Luigi; the whole Super Mario crew must run this damn place.  Where’s Bowser and Princess Peach) explains that despite his former warnings about his ligaments, Deku’s limbs are still functioning because he’s not the same as he was before.  So, before, Deku’s injuries were like his limbs were exploding from the inside, but this time those “explosions” were able to escape his body.  Also his Black Whip cast helped keep Deku’s arm in tact so that he wouldn’t pulverize himself.  His ligimates are still degrading too, so Deku still has to be careful.  I think he might have a few more small scars too, but that could just be shadows or muscle lining from Horikoshi’s pen-work.  

Ok, honestly, I’m not sure how this logically works...  I’m no medical professional, but I assume this means that Deku’s built his body up so much that it’s naturally able to withstand more damage than before and that’s why he’s more durable.  But, I don’t know how Deku was able to let the “explosions” escape this time.  I get the reverse; I get how he got injured before, but I don’t get this.  Was it the Black Whip brace he made for himself?  I honestly don’t really understand this.  Maybe the official translations will clear this up.  Or Horikoshi will in a Tweet or Volume Extra.

And Inko is finally informed of OFA thank the gods!  She was in the top of my list of “People who should really, really know OFA and what’s going on with Deku because I swear...”.  She’s clearly shaken up as anyone would be, but I’m glad she at least knows what’s going on with her son.  Yes, she’s still worried, but at least she can stop guessing why all this is happening.  

Deku announces the reason why he won’t go back to UA and it’s basically that Shigaraki can sense where Deku is and he doesn’t want to see anyone else close to him get hurt and/or die.  So, basically what I thought would be the reason.  Absolutely no surprise there.  But, going after Shigaraki and AFO first was originally Deku’s idea, so that’s something new.  Kid’s bold.

And this broke my heart 💔!  Inko insists that Deku stay with her to stay safe, but Deku knows what he has to do.  So, he thanks his mom, thanks her for making him happy, and tells her that he’ll be ok and that he’ll come back home with a somber smile on his face.  We see a flashback to Little Deku and Inko too when they were happier.  Bro, I don’t even know what to say.  I am in tears just writing this 😭  I’ll just post these two panels so y’all can cry with me.  I will never recover from this.  I’m fucking devastated.  You better come home, Deku: 

*sniffs* All Might remembers what he said to Inko.  He remembers how he said that he will protect Deku with his life.  All Might encourages Deku to go and he says that he’ll go with him with tears in his eyes.  He asks the Top 3 to help with this mission (finding Dabi) as their own mission coincides with Deku’s (finding Shigaraki and AFO).  I’m so glad all these adults are staying by Deku’s side throughout this.  It’s good to know that Deku still has support, though I wish it were from some of his friends too.  Maybe one day.

Deku goes to see Grand Torino in his hospital room to talk to him about OFA.  He mentions his friend and 7th Holder Nana Shimura.  Torino thinks he was responsible for killing Shigaraki (he really wasn’t let's be real).  He also tells Deku that Deku shouldn’t be so persistent in saving Shigaraki as killing can sometimes lead to salvation. Ok, few things:

1. I am surprised Grand Tarino is still alive.  I mean, we don’t know what happened to him after this talk, but at least he got to hear from Deku again.  It’s kind of nice to know that Tarino willingly passed down his cape to Deku too instead of Deku just taking it after his death.  Also, I’ve been watching some of Jujutsu Kaisen like everyone else has and this give me some Yuji & his grandfather vibes to it.  Knowing what happens there and that JJK’s magaka is good friends with Horikoshi, I have a sinking feeling I know what happened after this talk...

2. Deku looks so much older here.  Like, it’s not that cute, innocent baby face we knew at the beginning.  I don’t even know what it is exactly (maybe the eyes), but he just looks more mature here.  Also, his uniform some buttons down looks really good on him, I’m sorry but I need to mention that too 💚.

3. “Killing is a means towards salvation”.  Oh, boy...  I mean, I get it.  Some people just can’t be saved or captured in hopes of rehabilitation/redemption.  Sometimes killing people is necessary to save others.  But, Deku is not a killer.  He will try to save Shigaraki no matter what.  That was established again last chapter.   He tried to save Muscular for god’s sake.  But, I am curious if Gran Tarino’s words are going to hold any weight in the final fight. Like, will Deku have to kill Shigaraki?  What will that do to Deku as a person?  I’m really curious if Horikoshi is going to make Deku do this.

And finally, there’s a page showing off the Top 3, Deku, and All Might team up with the resolve to beat the LoV.  I am really interested to see where this goes.  Deku is working with the big Pro Heroes instead of his classmates/friends.  This hasn’t really happened before.  I also wonder if Shoto and Bakugo know what Deku’s doing then.  Because Shoto’s going to help Endeavor and his family find Dabi.  Endeavor’s activley helping Deku.  Also, Endeavor and Best Jeanist are both Bakugo’s mentors.  All Might too actually.  Look, maybe I’m making excuses to see my Origin Trio together again, but I do have to wonder if Shoto and Bakugo are involved somehow.

Welp, that’s it.  This chapter was a rollercoaster!  I was excited, I was confused, I was worried, I cried my eyes out at one point because THOSE TWO PANELS I CANNOT 💔😭!  I’m honestly just waiting for Horokishi to drop some major time-skip on us at some point.  I don’t want him to, but I won’t be entirely surprised if he does.  The end of this chapter is a good place to end if Horikoshi wants to segway into something else like, oh IDK, THE UA KIDS LET ME SEE THEM AGAIN HORIKOSHI PLS I’M BEGGING 💸  

Me @ Horikoshi almost every week:

[blazehedgehog]

What are your thoughts on the infamous "Top Ten Hottest Female Sonic Characters" video? I don't mean that question as a joke, do you think that that video kinda set back the image of "Sonic fan" back for a good few years?

My stance on this has always been that everyone on the internet is weird about something, and Sonic fans are not necessarily weirder than anything you’d find if you overturned a rock in another corner of the internet.

This is an immutable fact that becomes more obvious the more time you spend online. Spend enough time online and you’re going to see something you didn’t know existed, and if you spend too much time online, eventually you start to become numb to it.

In isolation I think that video is meaningless. There’s lots of things out there of that caliber -- the “Andy drawing a map of Princess Peach’s Eyes” image, for example. You might know of that image, but not many people know that it was only one of many. There was a whole series of those comics that was basically “me, a human male of the real world, repeatedly express my deep romantic affection for Princess Peach.”

Or, like, Pokemon, right? I remember in the early days of the Let’s Play community, Pokemon Let’s Plays had to be permanently banned from SomethingAwful on all grounds because it attracted thirsty creepers who weren’t very subtle about their feelings towards underage girls.

Like I said, there’s weird stuff all over the place if you point the spotlight in the wrong directions. And for some people out there, it’s part of growing up -- more and more of the internet is being taken up by the awkward intellectual awakening period we experience in transition from child to adult. A lot of earnest emotional confusion is being permanently recorded out there for all to see as we all figure ourselves out.

Tangentially, I see discussion today about how Zoomers in particular are a generation that has no guilt and openly embraces the cheesy and the stupid with genuine love, and I think it’s related to that. They can’t hide from who they were as kids, they just kind of have to own it. I can respect that.

What I think happened with Sonic is just the games themselves being so bad. Getting things like Shadow the Hedgehog, and Sonic 2006, or even the later Ken Penders run of the Archie comics, whatever, and kind of forcing the question: “If they’re always so terrible, why do they keep making more?”

That naturally leads to one answer: because Sonic fans keep buying them. So what’s wrong with Sonic fans?

“Well I saw this video one time...”

“There’s this webcomic about this medallion...”

“Have you seen what these church kids are drawing?”

In the big picture, nothing out of the ordinary is actually happening here. Kids are being kids (broadly speaking). It's a natural effect of Sonic maintaining a certain level of popularity with a certain age group for a sustained period of time.

I’ve even talked about how Sonic has kind of reached this status where the franchise is almost a perpetual motion machine. Sega couldn’t kill Sonic the Hedgehog at this point if they tried. It’s become this thing like Star Trek or Transformers where fans will just exist forever, even during lulls in quality or breaks in media. They will churn out their own new content and feed each other for theoretical eternity. If Sonic has survived this much for this long, it is immortal.

But that also means that, like... what is a “brand”? It’s a set of standards and rules governing the appearance and behavior of a specific piece of intellectual property. In order to be “on-brand” you have to adhere to the rules, otherwise you are not allowed to be part of the brand. Luigi is always taller than Mario. Mega Man’s briefs are always a different color than his arms and thighs. Sonic the Hedgehog can never cry.

Fans don’t have to stay on brand. The “brand” is whatever they think it should be. They can do anything with the characters, take them anywhere, write anything they feel like, embarrassing or not. Sonic the Hedgehog is a ghost now? Sure why not. Tails is part of a massive crossover involving every cartoon media property in a war against internet bullying? Nobody can stop you. You can just make up anything and do it. Sega probably wouldn't approve, but if you're a fan, you don't need their approval. You just need faith in your own ideas.

And this even applies to big budget, professional work. We've seen it before, when Sega lets other people redesign Sonic. Style guides and brand rules are what keeps a character in check so they look and act in a consistent way, but if you pull back the curtain and look at what gets submitted before the rules are applied...

...then even professional, “official” designs start getting pretty weird. Artistic license is great and all but people will break characters over their knee and remake them as something unrecognizable if you give them enough room to do so.

And for a fandom, not only can they be like this all the time, forever, they can go even further beyond. When you have an imagination, the sky is the limit.

And, again, I say “fandom” there. Not just Sonic fandom, but all fandoms, everywhere. They always were, and always will be like this. (And, to be clear: that’s great!)

The only difference is, Sega’s own inability to stay consistent gave more people a reason to go turning over rocks and seeing what crawled out. Unsurprisingly, a very active, self-sustaining fanbase meant there was a lot to see.

[istadris]

We all know how Luigi adopted Polterpup and how everyone finds it ironic since he's scared of ghosts.

What if he found an abandoned and hurt baby bat (not Antasma) while visiting Pi'illo Island and decides to adopt it too because he can't possibly let the poor thing suffer like this, the bat getting attached to him after he cares for it and sees him as its parent. Grew attached too but is hesitant to take it with him since he doesn't know if it'll survive in a whole other habitat and he's reluctant to ask Prince Dreambert for permission. In the end the bat goes with him.

I feel like this would benefit him because he naturally loves taking care of others and so having someone new added to the family who's a bit more dependent on him really allows him to let those urges out. Also, it helps his guilt because while he will fight villains to save his loved ones and stop evil schemes that can damage the world, he still feels bad for hurting others and making their urges for evil worse due to hatred.

So he has Polterpup for King Boo, who despite all the terrors he's put him through, he feels bad for trapping him so many times and keeping him away from his boos. The baby bat for Antasma, because he feels guilty for fighting him after he was betrayed and the fight resulted in his death. (Dimentio doesn't count here for obvious reasons-). I just think it'd really fit.

Also, I keep picturing the baby bat being albino, no idea why, but I do.

My only objection to all of this might have been that Luigi is such a disaster magnet, animals often end up hating him or biting him, on the exception of Polterpup, or that he's too much of a mess to take care of a pet that's not already a ghost.

But then it hit me. Of COURSE Luigi would end up looking after a scary-looking, ghost-like, bitey little thing ! How much do you want to bet that he met it when it flew right into his face during a walk, and Luigi spent several minutes screaming and trying to get it off his hair while screaming "GHOOOOOOST" ? He's only allowed to have a pet if he goes through hell before adopting it XD

Plus, I'm thinking about Partners in Time where, even if sometimes he messes up, he has very nurturing instincts, always taking care of the babies and having his baby self grow so attached to him he doesn't want to leave adult Luigi...And also Polterpup himself! Puppy was a little troublemaker when he first met Luigi, causing trouble just to play, and at the end, despite all the trouble caused, all it took was a sad puppy look for Luigi to forgive everything and bring back puppy home!

I also love very much the idea that it's his way of making up for hurting some of his ennemies. He's a forgiving type, our Luigi, much like his brother; despite the ghosts harassing him in every Luigi's Mansion, the moment they stop being hostile or brainwashed, he's all up for putting the past behind and having fun with them. If King Boo wasn't so bent on ending his game, maybe Luigi would give him a chance too.

Anyway, back to baby bat : yes to it, and also imagine Antasma coming back with a whole plan to get into Luigi's good graces and obtain his powers by manipulating him...

And then he finds Luigi cuddling an adorable little bat and calling it sweet names.

The screech ! The outrage !!

[peaches2217]

More assorted Mario Bros headcanons, this time focusing on their upbringing!

✨ Their parents were first-generation immigrants from different parts of Italy. They met in Brooklyn as teenagers and the rest, as they say, is history.

✨ Their father passed away when they were two or three years old, so they don’t have many memories of him. Most of what they know about him comes from the stories their mother told them. She never had a bad word to say about even his worst qualities. Those stories and the way she told them are a big part of the reason Mario grew up to be a hopeless romantic.

✨ Being the elder brother by a whole three minutes, Mario took it upon himself growing up to fill the shoes his father left behind so he could take care of his mother and Luigi. He aspired to become that perfect man Mama Mario spoke of with bright and misty eyes: kind, gracious, full of humor, strong, soft-hearted, steadfast in his values and beliefs, slow to anger, quick to forgive.

✨ Finding a workable balance between all of those values took a while. Mario’s a deeply emotional guy, always has been, and while he has a fairly easy time forgiving transgressions against himself, transgressions against his loved ones are another story entirely. He was the sort of kid who’d take Yo Mama jokes personally (“Our mom is a wonderful woman!” he would snarl while Luigi did his best to physically drag Mario away from the altercation). To say nothing of how he’d react to someone slighting Luigi…

✨ Luigi is autistic and Mario has ADHD. Their neurodivergences are part of the reason they’ve always been so deeply on the same wavelength, that combined with classic twin tropes.

✨ Luigi was outed as bisexual in the seventh grade, when the little journal he kept at the time fell out of his bag and into the wrong hands. His biggest fear was, of all things, how Mario would react — he already felt like a freak to the rest of the world, becoming a freak to his brother and closest friend would have been unbearable. He was both horrified and relieved to find Mario in the courtyard after school, amassing a crowd as he beat the living shit out of the guy who outed Luigi in the first place, because he knew then that nothing had changed between them (and that Mario would be grounded for the next month. “Beyond worth it,” Mario assured him).

✨ Luigi also developed an affinity for wearing feminine clothes around that time; he’d always been curious but finally got the nerve to try it with his brother’s encouragement. Mario would bring him to boutiques and the mall and suchlike and then buy anything Luigi bought in his own size, that way if anyone had the audacity to stare, he could make a spectacle of himself so those eyes stared at HIM instead of Luigi.

✨ Their mother fell ill their senior year of high school and passed when they were in trade school. Neither remembers much from the year she died. They both threw themselves into their training and didn’t look back.

✨ Both bros started drinking coffee as young teenagers, Mario to emulate his father and Luigi to emulate Mario. They enjoy it as adults, though Mario far more than Luigi; Luigi prefers tea. Mario hated tea until he learned it was Peach’s drink of choice, at which point he sought Luigi’s help in developing a taste (or at least tolerance) for it. That help mostly consisted of Luigi making like five different types of tea each night and cheering Mario on as he downed them like vodka shots.

[nintendylan64]

Hello Tumblrs, NintenDCAU here, I have an idea for a movie.

The movie is going to be about the Boogeyman. I got the inspiration for the idea from the Real Ghostbusters episode, "The Boogieman Cometh", somewhat Luigi's Mansion, and a 2012 fan film of the Real Ghostbusters on YouTube.

My characters that I have are the following.

1. Michael Evans- A teenage boy and one of the main characters. He is known for being dry, and deadpan in personality and speech, and also very easily scared. He is very intelligent, and experienced with the Boogeyman, as he had terrifying experiences with the Boogeyman in the past, which led to his study, so he could vanquish him forever.

2. Kimberly Baxter- A teenage girl who is known for being tomboyish, but also reckless at times. She may underestimate danger, but makes sure to keep cautious when needed. She has been visited by the Boogeyman in the past, and is very interested in finding his dimension.

3. Steven Ramis- A teenage boy who is a no-nonsense guy, and also a sensitive guy. He has a strong sense of adventure, but worries about the possible dangers he could face. He suffers from survivor's guilt due to him witnessing the death of his brother, Lloyd. He has a close friendship with Elizabeth Domingo which goes back to elementary school. He was visited by the Boogeyman as a kid, and he wishes to put an end to the Boogeyman for almost killing him.

4. Elizabeth Domingo- A gothic Girl who is known for being sarcastic, and a wiseguy in some ways. She has a fascination with paranormal things, and especially the Boogeyman, in order to understand how he works. She has a close friendship with Steven, and also a slight crush on him because of his sensitive personality.

5. The Boogeyman- A malevolent, deceiving, manipulative and psychotic demon who is bent on kidnapping children across the world to turn into his proxies for complete control of the world. He can manipulate children, teenagers, and adults to go into his dimension by using things they like to lead them into his trap, and can also use the person's fears to drive them mad enough so that he can overpower them.

6. Zachary Davis- A naive, and timid child who was kidnapped by the Boogeyman, and taken to his dimension.

Supporting Characters

Peter and Christina Davis- The parents of Zachary Davis. Christina is confident in finding her son, but is distressed about her son's kidnapping. Peter is very skeptical and tries to write off his son's kidnapping by the Boogeyman as a prank by Zachary, or a kidnapping by a predator.

The siblings and families of the main characters.

A news reporter.

Police officers.

Detectives.

Families of kids who have gone missing.

Missing kids.

Lloyd Ramis (as a hallucination and an illusion by the Boogeyman).

Family members/parents of the protagonists.

Proxies.

Setting

The film will take place somewhere in Maryland, and in the Boogeyman's Dimension.

I will be playing Steven, so I may need a director, and some cast members.

I've also recently thought about whether it should be live action or animated. I feel like it being an animated movie could offer more attempts at capturing scenery.

[coll2mitts]

Super Mario Bros. (1993)

Thanks to the awesome people who donated to Extra Life (you still can, btw!)  y'all will now be treated to a retrospective on the 1993 classic movie, Super Mario Bros.  When I took on this milestone, the first (and only) person I messaged for ideas on terrible (but wonderful) films based on video games was my friend Max, who has a history of viewing and talking about bad movies.  He suggested this, and while I was aware of this magnificent piece of cinema history, I had not had the pleasure of viewing it myself.  He hooked me up with a copy, and to say this film lived up to my expectations would be an understatement.

I couldn’t help but be charmed by this movie.  It is filled with so many questionable creative choices that were fucking ridiculous.  Mario and Luigi not being blood related?  Sure.  Cheesy Italian accents replaced with a New York ones?  Yeah, why not?  Having all the enemies in Super Mario Bros. be canonically dinosaurs?  I mean... It's a choice informed by the great media dino wave of 1993, but whatever.  Yoshi is a dinosaur, if we want to extend that to goombas and Koopa for whatever reason, I'm down.  Having these dinosaurs live underneath New York City in a parallel dimension?  It's based on a video game, why the fuck not?  Everything is so goddamn bonkers.

The opening credits roll, and we’re told that 65 million years ago, a meteor created said underground parallel universe dinosaur land.  We witness a human-looking woman, who is really a dinosaur, leaving an egg baby on a church doorstep.  Don’t think about it too hard, the logistics of a human giving birth to an egg that size are just... it’s gross to think about.

We’re then introduced to the titular characters, Mario Mario and Luigi Mario.  Yes, their last names are Mario.  Making them the Mario brothers.  Because this movie is interested in answering the important questions.  Mario is the owner of a failing plumbing business, while Luigi is a conspiracy theorist who would have really enjoyed modern-day YouTube.

While they’re out trying to find work, they run into Miss Amy March herself, Daisy, who is an archeologist in charge of digging up dinosaur bones from a New York City construction site.  She’s being forced off the property by the mob, who apparently are annoyed that a blonde lady in cargo shorts is coming between them and whatever the fuck they’re building.  

They try and intimidate her, she storms off to use a payphone to call for security, and is almost picked up by two inconspicuous bozos in a cab who apparently are stealing Brooklyn women off the street for no reason.  Their plan is quickly thwarted by a random moving pane of glass.

Instead, Daisy runs right into Luigi, who forgets how to human once he sees her pretty face.  He asks her on a date, where she reveals even more exposition.  She believes the meteor that destroyed the dinosaurs landed in New York City.  Oh, and also, she’s the abandoned egg baby.  Luigi is also an orphan, and this shared trauma apparently gets them both hot and bothered.  They wander off to the dig site, because an underground pit attached to a sewer is so romantic, and it is also where Daisy feels the most comfortable.

What if we made out at the bone pit?

Their touching moment is cut short when the mob sabotages the plumbing in the sewer and water starts flooding the area.  They run to get Mario, because he is a plumber, to fix the pipes, which is so fucking clutch, I love it so much.

While the Mario brothers are distracted, Daisy is captured by the weirdo twins and dragged into the alternate dinosaur universe.  Mario and Luigi follow, and we’re treated to the most fucking amazing transition scene of Bob Hoskins spinning wildly through colorful rocks.

Turns out, parallel dinosaur world, or Dinohattan, is fucking lit as hell.  I am convinced that Futurama based their sewer city on this movie.

King Koopa, who is a dinosaur with badly bleached hair gelled back in an effort to look like Michael Douglas in Wall Street, has taken over Dinohattan.  He is the one who asked the goons to kidnap Daisy, because of the tacky crystal necklace she wears.  Apparently, it is a piece of the meteorite that crashed into earth, and once he puts the piece back into the original space rock, the dinosaur world will merge with the mammal world after 65 million years of his people being sequestered underground, and Koopa will have endless resources at his disposal.  Also, Daisy is a princess, and her dad is a giant fungus taking over the city, so that’s totally normal and not at all weird.

Problem is, the two idiots he sent to grab her didn’t think to check if she was wearing the necklace.  Turns out, Luigi has the necklace, or had the necklace, as they are quickly mugged by a granny, who is then robbed by a lady with a bright red spiky latex coat and springy robot feet.  The brothers are then arrested by the dinocops and are grilled by Koopa for the whereabouts of the rock.  When they play dumb he uh... reacts in a proportionate way.

I am not even going to attempt to explain the devo process...  It is a combination of insane and fucking disgusting.  Whoever in the costuming department looked at the cute fucking mushroom Goombas in the video game and decided to translate them into this scaly, jagged-teethed nightmare fuel deserves to be committed.

Also, there’s only one lizard king, and that’s Jim Morrison, so back off, buddy.

What is hilarious to me is this is the story the screenwriters came up with.  Super Mario, as a video game, doesn’t have much lore, right?  You slide down pipes, you jump on mushrooms, and you save the princess from a spiky turtle.  They took that game and created... This.  A parallel underground dinosaur universe that has a sentient fungus as a king, taken over by a human-like t-rex that devolves other lizards into tiny-headed night paralysis demons.

The middle of this movie alternates between a slog of expositional scenes about Daisy being a princess, and pretty entertaining action scenes of the Mario brothers running from Goombas while trying to find and save Daisy.  Mario and Luigi steal a cop car and drive it off a cliff Thelma and Louise-style; They cosplay as Ketchup and Mustard to steal the necklace back from Big Burtha while asking her to stomp on them; They jump off a bridge into a garbage truck; They break the pipes in Koopa’s building to freeze everything, and get past an elevator full of Goombas by making them dance.

Watching Daisy damsel-in-distress-it in Koopa’s high rise office building and fend off advances by a long-tongued dude who devolved her father into a mushroom was pretty boring and disturbing.  Alternatively, witnessing Bob Hoskins and John Leguizamo pretend to jump on giant sheets of fungus really sold this movie for me.  It succeeds when it tries to be ridiculous and fun, and fall flat when it attempts to integrate any sort of drama that I’m assuming was added to make this story more appealing to adults.

Mario and Luigi eventually find Daisy, and she introduces them to her father - a giant dripping blob suspended from the ceiling.  Luigi wants in her pants badly enough that he pretends this is a reasonable thing to do.  Mario heads further into the building to free the other ladies kidnapped by tweedle dee and tweedle dum that they initially thought were Daisy, but weren’t.  The newly assembled group are able to escape by sliding down the frozen pipes on a mattress before they are green-screen launched out of the pipe and back into the greater Dinohattan area.

The amount of times Mario and Luigi use their plumbing skills to overcome obstacles may be my favorite part of this movie.  The plot goes out of its way to justify a really bizarre character trait for the original game.

Anyway, the end of this movie comes at you fast.  First, the sentient fungus king gives Mario and Luigi a bomb, and they decide to wind it up and aim it at Koopa.  This takes about 10 minutes of screen time to matter again.

Koopa’s second-in-command tries to merge Daisy’s stolen necklace with the meteor, and instead gets skeletoned to bits, prompting the best line delivery reaction from Daisy, a deadpan “Yikes”.

Because the necklace has now been returned to its resting place, the worlds start to merge Infinity War style.

“Mr. Koopa, I don’t feel so good.”

Koopa and Mario end up back in Manhattan, and Koopa just starts shooting his devo guns at human mobsters, turning them back into primates, and giving their wardrobe a whole new literal definition of monkey suit.

Luigi uses his super plumbing powers to drill the necklace back out of the meteor, separating the worlds again.  The bomb finally goes off, they devo Koopa into slime, and the citizens celebrate by immediately painting over his ever-prevalent propaganda.

The king evolves back into a mushroom person or something, and Daisy stays in Dinohattan to get to know her father better.  Mario and Luigi return to their lives in Brooklyn as plumbers, and their heroic acts make them conspiracy community famous, as they now refer to our heroes as the Super Mario Brothers.  Roll Credits.

Except not, because Daisy returns to ask for the help of a couple of great plumbers, setting up a sequel that will never, ever happen because there is no god and we’re not allowed to feel joy.

Honestly, Super Mario Bros. is great.  It owned every bold plot and visual choice it made, and I have to respect it.  I could listen to John Leguizamo say Mario like 700 more times.  Y’all are missing out if you think you’re too cool to watch this movie.

I’ll be back to musical reviews later this month.  I have a few seasonally appropriate movies in my big red sack waiting to be placed under the tree...  Yes, I meant to phrase it that way.

[fanfictionofkathrinesnow]

Keep in mind that this is an ongoing project, so the timeline may change to suit the story’s needs.

This timeline also CONTAINS SPOILERS as it shares a brief breakdown of all the Super Mario stories I intend to write.

Part 2

Super Mario Disaster Master Page

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- Mario Bombs Away

Mario Sr.’s wartime adventures before he enters the Mushroom World.

Mario Sr. immigrated to the US from Italy as a young adult, where he lived a normal life as a workman. I��m not sure if he was drafted or if he volunteered, but he ended up as a soldier about midway through the Vietnam War. He picked up the skills to navigate the Mushroom World there, from his experiences with jungle warfare.

(I don’t plan to write this, but it provides valuable background information.)

- Donkey Kong

Later in life, Mario Sr. stumbles into the Mushroom World, where he meets his future wife (who doesn’t have a name yet).

DK (a young Cranky Kong) saved her from an arranged marriage and a horrible political situation. However, she doesn’t know that was DK’s intention and neither does Mario. Mario happens to spot them and chases the two around for a while until the misunderstanding clears up. They leave DK on good terms and Mario escorts her to the Mushroom Kingdom (the closest group of humans not caught up in her homeland’s mess) to seek asylum, and Peach’s family welcomes them warmly.

She adores Mario, and eventually they get married.

(Mario Sr. and his wife end up playing a significant role in the Mushroom Kingdom after their arrival. The bro's mom is a powerful star sage, and becomes something of a mentor for Peach’s mother. Peach’s dad takes Mario Sr. on as a sort of bodyguard, and they become fast friends.)

- Yoshi Island

Some years later, Mario Sr. and his wife have twins. Things go well for a while, but when the boys are around two, word gets out about some particularly potent prophecies concerning them. Bowser’s dad sends Kamek to kidnap the boys; he gets Luigi but loses Mario along the way.

Mario Sr. attempts to get them back, but sustains a serious injury in the process. He walks with a cane for the rest of his life. The Yoshis save the day and everything turns out alright, but Mario Sr. no longer feels capable of protecting his kids. He moves his family back to the US—to his old home in Brooklyn.

(Between the kidnapping and his time in Darkland, Luigi develops some childhood trauma from this incident. This plays a big role in his young life.)

(Despite these events, Mario Sr. doesn’t leave the mushroom world until the boys are about five. Not long after Yoshi’s Island, Bowser’s father dies at the hands of Cackletta, making Mario Sr. think the boys are safe. But yet another incident occurs a year or two later. I don’t know the details—it’s a stand-in for Partners in Time, but I know it doesn’t play out the same way. This is the last straw and Mario Sr. moves his family to Brooklyn.)

(I’m pretty sure Peach’s dad and Mario Sr. have a falling out as well, over the Surassaland-backed pilfering of Darkland after King Koopa’s death. Mario Sr.’s injuries save him from having to get involved, but I don't think the concept sits well with him. It caused a rift between them—nothing nasty, but enough to prevent any burning desire to return to the Mushroom World soon.)

- “Origins”

The bro’s mom dies in an accident when they’re 15 or 16, removing any lingering desire Mario Sr. has to return to the Mushroom Kingdom. He lives the remainder of his life with his boys, running “Mario and Sons Plumbing” and eventually dies of a stroke. The boys are probably 22.

Origins is several of the side-scrolling games wedged into one.

When the bros go through their parent’s possessions after their father’s death, Mario finds the portal painting their parents kept to get back to the mushroom world (the same deal as the paintings in Mario 64). He jumps through and mucks about for a while, exploring the world and having the strangest sense of dejavu. He winds up in the right place at the right time to save Princess Peach from Bowser. When Mario escorts her back to her castle, Toadsworth recognizes him immediately, because of how much Mario looks like his father. Toadsworth doesn’t say anything, but he encourages Mario’s visits and makes him feel special and welcome. Mario makes a habit of showing up after that, and starts building a reputation for heroics.

(Peach’s parents both died not long after Mario Sr. left. I don’t know the details yet, but I’m pretty sure it was a case of “what goes around comes around.” This left Peach in the care of Toadsworth, who she basically considers her dad now. Despite the sudden loss of the king and queen, with the help of Sarasaland Toadsworth managed to retain most of the Mushroom Kingdom's land and resources, including the territory stolen from a young Prince Bowser.)

- Super Mario Land

Mario and Peach have become good friends by this point. When Peach gets word that her childhood friend Daisy needs help, she goes to Mario, sending him on a wild adventure into the heart of Surassaland. He meets Daisy’s family in this story, and though they keep their feelings veiled, they instantly consider him a threat and a rival for Peach’s hand (despite their falling out with Peach, they still hope she will get over her issues with them and marry Prince Haru, Daisy’s big brother). This incident foreshadows some of the political issues that come into play later in the timeline.

- RPG

Mario is pretty well known across the Mushroom Kingdom, Darkland, and Surassalnd by now. He visits the mushroom world more frequently and stays for longer (leaving Luigi very concerned, but more on that later). Then Smithy shows up, sweeping Mario into one of his biggest adventures yet.

Through this situation, Mario meets Geno, who talks about some of the prophecies that mention the bros. He also introduces Mario to the concept of “star chosen” and “sages.” He heavily implies that the bro’s mother was a very powerful figure in the mushroom world. I don’t know how much of this Mairo swallows, probably not a lot, but it opens the door to that sort of thinking. It also prompts him to talk to Toadsworth, who confirms that Mario Sr. had lived in the mushroom world and met the bro’s mother there.

- Mario Bros

Things stay quiet for a while after RPG. Bowser keeps himself busy rebuilding his castle, and generally being conflicted after fighting alongside Mario and Peach. But when he finally does go after Peach again and Mario stomps him as usual, all his hard feelings come rolling back.

In the meantime, Luigi is becoming seriously concerned. Mario hardly helps with the business anymore—he’s hardly around at all. When he does come back, he brings all sorts of money with him, and more than once he’s been busted up. Luigi's starting to think Mario has gotten tangled into a gang or something.

That is, until Mario takes home a power star and tucks it under the floorboard.

Geno told Mario about the star chosen—told him that only the chosen can hear the glittering sound that stars make. With Bowser obviously growing desperate, Mario tucks a star away in his secret stash just in case, assuming Luigi won’t be able to hear it.

Luigi spends all day looking for whatever’s making that infernal ringing sound, and when he finds it, the star won’t stop following him and flying around his head. When Mario comes back to find a very disgruntled Luigi with questions.

Reluctantly, Mario starts to explain. Luigi is incredulous, that is, until a hoard of massive turtles come flooding after Mario from the sewers.

- Mario 64

When Mario and Luigi become cornered in the apartment above their shop, Mario drags Luigi through the painting. They sprint for the castle to warn Peach, only to find Bowser waiting for them. The situation ends badly.

Luckily, Yoshi manages to free Mario so he can save the day, but it’s a rough first introduction to the mushroom world for Luigi. But once he’s free, he does help Mario gather stars, and as the adventure goes on Luigi gets the same feeling of dejavu for the world that Mario did.

(After 64, utterly exhausted and their home in Brooklyn destroyed, Mario and Luigi accept Toadswroth’s offer to stay at the castle for a while. Mario explains to Luigi in detail his adventures in the mushroom world, and with both brothers finally present, Toadsworth explains the full story of their parents as well. Luigi can’t disbelieve it—not anymore. He can also see that Mario is very taken with the princess.

At the end of their stay, Luigi offers to relocate to the Mushroom Kingdom for good, moving what’s left of the family plumbing business with him.)

Keep in mind that this is an ongoing project, so the timeline may change to suit the story’s needs.

This timeline also CONTAINS SPOILERS as it shares a brief breakdown of all the Super Mario stories I intend to write.

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Part 2

Super Mario Disaster Master Page