#and then i need to fix anything breezy says needs to be fixed because i trust her more than i trust myself

[littledreamling]

I have tentatively finished The Wrong Name at a staggering* 5.2k words

*staggering not in volume, because I’ve written more in way less time, but because this was supposed to be less than half of that length… oops

[justmeinadaze]

Children of the Night Part 7 (Steddie X You)

A/N: Some of my own personal damage has entered the angsty chat lol Enjoy!

Warnings: Vampire Daddy Eddie/ Sub Vampire Stevie/ Sub Human Fem Reader, SMUT, dp, dirty talk, biting (obviously), mentions of blood drinking (yeah they're vampires), etc, FLUFF, they love each other :), ANGST!! (because Im me), Slight Child Abuse Trigger, we meet reader mom finally and goes about as well as you would think, mentions of feeling like/being a burden (I'm noticing a theme in my writing *thinks*), Eddie touches briefly on his childhood and his dad being in jail, these three get into a bit of a fight, I believe that be it.

Word Count: 6015

Series Here

That following morning after they fell asleep, you snuck out of their house and drove away in no particular direction. You needed to get away not because you were afraid of them or anything but because you were utterly terrified of getting them hurt again or worse. You loved them too much to allow that happen so you reverted to your default and ran. 

You had many hiding spots around the city including the bar you were sitting in. Whenever your mom would come home in a mood or bring home a guy that made your skin crawl you went to one of these places. This bar allowed you entry even when you were underage because the owner knew one of the boys you had run with. As you got older he said you were always welcome to hang out should you need to. 

A part of you hoped you were far enough away that both boys wouldn’t sense you especially since as night fell, you couldn’t feel Steve at all. Part of you thought you’d feel anger or sadness but more than anything all you felt was guilt. 

The band in front of you begins to play a song you recognize and your heart breaks as you try to subpress the tears that want to fall by knocking back another shot. 

A cold hand taps your shoulder and without saying a word your eyes lock with Steve while Eddie silently takes a seat in front of you. The newly made vampire tugs on your bicep but when you subtly shake your head, he tugs you again until you rise to your feet and walk with him to the makeshift dance floor. 

“Tears stream down your face When you lose something you cannot replace Tears stream down your face, and I.”

Wrapping his arms around your back, your hands cling to his shoulders as you force yourself to look anywhere that isn’t his face. 

“Tears stream down your face I promise you I will learn from my mistakes Tears stream down your face, and I.”

Your bottom lip trembles as images of the last few days flash through your mind including the sight of him bleeding on your bedroom floor and Eddie’s panicked voice when he thought the man he loved may be gone.

“Lights will guide you home And ignite your bones And I will try to fix you.”

Feeling your pain, Steve’s palm pressed you into his chest as his arms circled tighter around you while he listened to you cry. He kissed the top of your head while you both swayed and rested his cheek in your hair. 

As the song ended and people in the bar clapped, you hastily pushed him back and headed towards the table to grab your things. You thought Eddie would try and stop you but he didn’t, his eyes watching you with what felt like pity. 

Slamming open the bar door, you inhaled the warm but breezy night air before heading for your car. Wind whipped around you and suddenly the metalhead was blocking your entry into your vehicle. 

“Move, please.”

“You’ve been drinking. I’m not letting you drive. You may walk if you wish.”

“You’re not in charge of me anymore, Eddie.”

“Oh, yeah? I didn’t get that memo. Is that why you left without a word?”

“I’m allowed to come and go as I please.”

“Not after someone tried to murder you yesterday. It’s our job to take care of you.”

Rolling your eyes, you stomp off towards sidewalk near the beach as they followed close behind. 

“Leave me alone!”, you shout as you try to walk faster. “I don’t want to be with either of you anymore!”

Your hair blew in front of your face as Steve appeared in front of you blocking your path. 

“Ok. You don’t want to be with us anymore. That’s fine but it’s not going to stop us from looking after you to make sure you’re ok.”

“I’m not your responsibility! Trust me. You don’t want that burden.”

“Interesting word choice. Did your mother teach you that?”, Eddie replied in a snark filled tone. “Because, princess, you aren’t a burden. We like taking care of you.”

“Oh, so, these past couple of nights have been fun for you?! Watching him bleed to death and then changing him was exciting, Eddie? All the pain you went through was fantastic, Steve?!”

“What happened wasn’t your fault, Y/N.”

“YES IT IS! If you two had never met me you would have had no reason to be at my house!”

“Then you would be DEAD!”, Steve growled loudly, his eyes turning black with anger as he stepped forward. 

“Sweetheart, it’s ok. Calm down.”, the metalhead coos as he rubs his boyfriend’s back trying to comfort him. “I think you forget, little one, how all this started. Remember, I told you I always felt you. I don’t know why and I can’t control it. I felt it with Steve even before I turned but it was stronger after. If everything had played out the same way, we would have gotten involved. Each time those assholes went looking for you, they intended to kill you and I will NOT allow anyone to hurt you like that.”

As you three glare at each other, the cellphone in your pocket begins to vibrate. 

“Hello?...Yeah, that’s me…um…ok. I’ll, um, I’ll be right there.”, you sigh as you slap the device. “Steve, what time is it?”

“8pm. Why? Why do you suddenly feel nervous?”

“Can one of you run me somewhere, please?”

“Where do you need to go, princess?”

Both set of eyes were now their regular color as they scanned you over with concern. 

“LA General.”, you reply flatly.

***

“Alright, perfect and here are your visitors passes. Just let the officer outside know you’re the daughter and they will let you through.”, the nurse grinned as you grimly smiled back. 

“Um, please don’t talk when we get in there. No matter what she says. Can you at least listen to me in that regard?”, you plead as you pause at the end of the hallway to address them. 

After both boys nod, you continue along your way, telling the officer outside who you were before he opened the door and allowed you three entry.

“Hey there. Are you Y/N?”, the doctor asks, politely shaking your hand after you nod. “It looks like the prison brought her in because her wounds were too severe to for their staff to handle. The guards said she got into an altercation with one of the other inmates and was stabbed by a shiv in her side. With some surgery and lots of blood, she seems to be doing better. Part of the reason we called you at the time was because due to her medical history with her liver we thought we may need a family member to donate the matching blood type but it looks like we had the perfect type here.”

“When are they taking her back?”, you ask. 

“Um, we need to keep an eye on her for the next couple of days but by the end of the week I imagine. She is a flight risk so we do have to…”, the doctor gestures towards her wrist and the handcuffs as you sigh. 

“Thank you for everything you’ve done. I appreciate it and I’m sure she does to.”

After leaving you alone, you take a seat by the hospital bed and both men do the same on opposite sides of you. 

“Is this your…?”

“Yeah, Eddie, this is my mom.” Your sad eyes scan her over making Steve wince as he feels your pain heightens, still not used to these new vampire things he’s experiencing. “She’s been in and out for years but this is the first time she’s been stabbed. Must have really pissed someone off.”

“I’m surprised you’re listed on her contact sheet. I would have thought due to the charge she wouldn’t be allowed to see you.”, the metalhead mused.

“I’m an adult now. When I was a kid she wasn’t but that was for like 3 years. When she was sentenced to 30 years, I was about fifteen. She tried to escape a few years ago but they caught her pretty quickly. They had called me to notify me thinking she may be coming for me. They found her at a bar about four miles away.”, you chuckled before leaning back in your seat and glaring at the tile floor. 

“I told you I’m not safe. People are always come for me. I never should have reached out to you guys. I should have left you alone—”

“No, no, Y/N. You should have. I know I’ve only been a vampire for a couple of days but this feeling I feel when it comes to you and Eddie…I don’t know how to explain it. When we woke up and you were gone…it felt like—”

“There’s a hole. Like something is missing.”, Eddie answered trying to help. 

“Yeah. If this is what he was feeling for two years after moved here…God, I wish I had known. I would have done anything to help him find out what they were and then find you.

“I thought it was just normal. I love Steve so much but there was always that nagging feeling that somethingwas amiss. Even you said those first few nights, I smiled more and laughed when you were there.”

A tear fell down your cheek as you shook your head. 

“You almost had that feeling again but worse because Steve was almost killed. I felt the things he experienced when he thought you were gone, Eddie. I can’t…I can’t do it. I love you both too much.”

“Jesus fucking Christ. Did I die?”, your mother whines as she cringes opening her eyes. “Trust me, she’s right. She was always meant to get in the way and ruin lives. Seriously, ask the condom that broke when she was conceived.”

Both vampires growled but she was in too much of a haze to notice as she tried to sit up. 

“What happened, mom? Why are people stabbing you now?”

“Because people keep trying to take what’s mine! Why are you even here, Y/N? Go away.”

“They called me because they thought they might need my blood since you’ve damaged all your other organs with years of alcohol. Blood that isn’t family’s surprising didn’t shock your system into shut down.”

“Always so fucking mouthy.”, she groans as she tries to reach for the call nurse button. “At least I can get some drugs.”

“Oh, mama. I’m sorry. Didn’t they tell you? As a ‘former alcoholic’ you don’t get the hard stuff but the Tylenol should be enough.”

At your sarcastic comment, Eddie and Steve felt both pain and satisfaction course through them as memories flashed through your mind. 

“Get. OUT! I didn’t want you here then and I don’t now!”

“Don’t talk to her that way.”, the pretty boy snarled in a deep tone. 

“Steve…please. You promised me.”, you plead. 

“Sweetheart, she shouldn’t be talking to you like this and you shouldn’t allow it.”

“Shouldn’t allow it? Are you fucking kidding me?! She’s weak just like her father was. Why do you think she ran off constantly?! She could never stay and face the music of trouble she caused so she ran and opened her legs to anyone who would take her. I’m not surprised you two fell for it! NOW GE—”

The wind swirled around you as the lights in the room turned off except for the overhead lamp above her hospital bed. Both vampires were on either side of her with Eddie’s palm placed over her mouth. 

“You know, I have a dad like you. Spent most of my life in and out of prison for petty crimes while abusing me and my mother. After she died, he just went out of control until they gave him life back home in Indiana. Thankfully, I had an uncle who took care of me after and then fell in love with a man who loved me for me. Unfortunately, your daughter didn’t have that. She spent her ENTIRE LIFE fighting for it up until a few weeks ago.”

“She seems to think all the bad things that have been happening are her fault. I wonder why that is.”, Steve asked rhetorically. “You don’t deserve her. Even now after everything you said she’s worried we’re going to kill you and, honestly, if she or Eddie wasn’t here I may have followed through with that.”

His eyes turned black in anger as her own widened in fear. 

“Stop it. Leave her be.”, you beg. “Please.”

“Are you sure, baby girl?”, Eddie murmured before abruptly both sets of black eyes looked your way. “Lose the attitude, Y/N.”

“I didn’t say anything.” You glared at them with a fury of your own. “But I guess it doesn’t matter. You’re going to do whatever the fuck you want anyway and I am NOT your baby girl. Not anymore.”

“You want us gone, honey? To ‘protect’ us?”, Steve growled as he began walking towards you. “Fine. Your wish is our punishment.”

Wind blew again and the lights blinked on leaving you and your mother alone.

“Jesus, this medication is a lot stronger than I realized.”, she sighed as you sat down again and began to sob.

##############

True to your request, they left you be and it killed you. Even worse, they hadn’t streamed at all in over two weeks so you weren’t able to even see their faces except in your dreams. Occasionally, you checked the chatter on their site doing the job they had paid you for while reading through people’s comments. 

Most of their fans seemed to think the police had succeeded in scaring them away while others thought you were the reason saying that Mina must have talked them out of it for one reason or another. 

A knock on your door one Saturday afternoon startled you but you were prepared, grabbing a nearby knife as you peaked through the curtain. 

“Dustin? Hey, what are you doing here?”

“Hey, Y/N. May I come in? I swear it’s just me.” Nodding, you allowed the boy entry and gestured towards your couch for him to take a seat. “Oh, um, I won’t be here that long but I just came down to check on Eddie and Steve. Seems Harrington is struggling a bit with being a vampire. Not because of you or anything!”, he quickly countered when your head hung. “At least…I don’t think so.”, Dustin sighs as he leans against your kitchen counter. 

“Mike and I did a ton of research after Steve said Eddie was still alive to try and get some explanation about why he is the way that he is without resorting to regular vampire lore but we couldn’t find anything outside of D&D. Over the past two years, he seems to follow the regular no sunlight, needs blood, and hates crosses but what I’ve always questioned is that feeling thing he’s mentioned.”

“I know in some comics when a vampire turns another they have a connection and can feel each other’s emotions or share memories kind of like what he told me happened after you drank his blood. What confuses me is, you and Steve weren’t turned when he felt you two.”

“Dustin, honey, why are you telling me this?”

The boy sighs again as he crosses his arms over his chest. 

“I’m thinking…that has to mean something, right? Whether it be chemical, cosmical, or supernatural… and the fact that Steve feels it to… that’s not a coincidence, Y/N. They both have been having a hard time and you can see it in their faces… I can see it in yours to.”

“They are streaming tonight. They are going to answer questions and just be seen. I think that will be good for them to get their minds focused on something. Maybe, you should do the same.”

After giving him a hug and walking him out, you sat in front of your computer screen and stared at the blank background for what felt like hours before heavily exhaling and logging into their site. People were a buzz with the fact that they would finally be seeing the vampire they adored so much and the human that took care of him. They had no idea. 

Their grainy faces suddenly illuminated your moniter and your heart shattered into a million pieces. Steve didn’t look like the man you had met a couple of months ago but a shell of someone else. His skin was unbelievably pale and his hair hung in front of his eyes blocking a lot of his face from your view. His body folded into itself as the beautiful smile you had fallen in love with was noticeably absent.  Eddie didn’t look any better as he quietly maneuvered the mouse in front of him as his black eyes scanned the screen. 

“Hey…hey everybody. I know it’s been a while but, um, as you can see I’ve been taking care of Renfield. I…uh…I had to turn him so…”

StokersQueen: “Doesn’t Renfield die after he’s turned? Are we going to lose him?!”

“No…no we aren’t going to lose him. We’ve just been going through a lot right now.”

Dracula4ever: “Is it because of that bitch Mina? I notice she’s not there this time.”

Both men growled at the comment.

“Don’t disrespect her like that.”

Dracula4ever: “Oh please! This show used to be awesome but you bring in one slut and everything changes!”

Dracula4ever has been booted from the stream.

“Mina?”, Eddie asked as his eyes scanned the screen for any confirmation. 

Babygirl85: “Come on, Mina! If you’re there, say something!”

Justhereironically: “MINA! <3”

InnocentLittleMina: “Even if she be not harmed, her heart may fail her in so much and so many horrors; and hereafter she may suffer--both in waking, from her nerves, and in sleep, from her dreams.”

The metalhead exhaled at your quote of the novel as the fans in chat went wild with awes and even more questions. 

“Do you believe in destiny? That even the powers of time can be altered for a single purpose? That the luckiest man who walks on this earth is the one who finds—”

“…true love.”, Steve finishes the quote with a deep tone that sounds nothing like his regular voice. “We miss you.”

“But we aren’t going to force you, sweetheart.”

Exhaling, they close their eyes as they feel all your emotions run through your body before finally landing on desperate wanting and immense love that you had never felt for anyone in your entire life. 

InnocentLittleMina: “I’m scared. Seeing you two in so much pain… I love you so much. I don’t…”

“I know. I know, Mina, but what happened wasn’t your fault. Your mom and childhood weren’t your fault. All the idiot men in your life who hurt you wasn’t because of you. Even as a human, princess, I would have done the same things to protect you because we love you to.”

“You deserve all the love you give to people, honey. It’s ok to let us take care of you and believe me. Out of everything I’ve experienced, this…”, Steve gestures to himself. “…is nothing. I get what Dracula is saying now when it comes to us and our guilt. NONE of this is your doing or your fault.”

They both softly smile at the camera as Eddie leans towards it as if he’s looking into your eyes. 

“Come back to Daddy, baby.”

You don’t even turn off your computer as you swivel in your chair and run towards the front door. Heavy rain hits your face as you search for your keys once you get to your car but ring laced hands abruptly grip your waist and after you blink you find yourself in their bedroom. 

Need overtakes you three as they lay on either side of you and remove your wet clothes while kissing any part of your skin they could reach. 

The sound of constant binging makes Eddie grunt in frustration as a grin stretches across your face. 

“You—mmm—you left the sound on.”, you pant.

Steve’s lips kiss along that sweet spot on your neck as the other vampire whooshes to computer, cheekily smiling as he quickly moves the mouse. 

“Sorry, guys. The three of us need to have a chat that doesn’t involve an audience.”

Getting annoyed with the machine in front of him, he yanks the cord from the wall before sprinting back beside you and attaching his mouth to your neck as well. Their hips grinded against your thighs as the pads of Steve’s fingers played with your clit.

After tilting back to remove his shirt, Eddie leans over your body and a long line of spit leaves his lips falling between your folds as the other boy collects it, pushing it into your pussy with his fingers making you groan. 

The feeling of teeth against your thigh makes you jump and the metalhead’s black eyes meet yours as they silently ask for permission before you nod your approval. Tugging on Steve’s arm, he brings him between your legs, kissing him passionately as their fingers play with your cunt. Both their lips travel along opposite limbs, licking and lightly sucking their way up to your meaty flesh. 

When their fangs penetrate your thighs at the same time, your eyes roll back as the pleasure courses through you. It wasn’t meant to feed, only to sustain as they snacked on your blood while their fingers moved faster against you; Eddie playing with your clit with his thumb while Steve quickly thrust his two digits into your center. 

Coming off you with a pop, you watch as the long-haired vampire made sure his boyfriend healed you properly before doing it himself. They licked your blood of their face and the sight alone had you shuddering as you came. 

“D-Daddy…”, you whimpered as he quickly came up to kiss your lips.

Flipping on to his back, he maneuvered you till you were sitting on his face while hovering over his hard, leaking cock. Spiting over the tip, you smeared it down him with your palm, enveloping your mouth around his length as Steve kissed random parts of your skin. 

Eddie’s tongue immediately began devouring you, flicking against your bundle of nerves as he wrapped his arms around your waist to hold you to him. 

“You look so beautiful like this. So fucking sexy.”, Steve murmured as his face pressed against the side of yours, his humid breathes warming your cheek.

Tilting his head just below yours, his mouth kissed and sucked on his boyfriend’s balls making him buck his hips up in pleasure, choking you slightly as drool spilled from your lips. 

As his lips encased around your clit, the sudden intrusion of Eddie’s finger into your ass simultaneously made you gasp as both vampires mewled at the feeling it gave as it coursed through them as well. 

“Did you like that, baby?”, Steve asked in a low seductive grumble that had you clenching around the other man’s tongue as he shook his head and pressed his face deeper into you. “Yeah? Fuck! I can feel you both. Have you ever had someone fuck you like that before?”

While your hand continued to pump him, Eddie slid another finger inside of you, stretching you further till your vision blurred as your orgasm was swiftly approaching. 

“Answer me, honey. Have you?”

“N-No. Please Daddy. It feels…”

“Yeah? Tell us, baby. How does it feel?” Pressing his nose to your cheek again, your mouth fell open as the English language left your brain. “Come on, Y/N. How does it feel?”

“Good! So fucking good! Please don’t stop!”

Steve grinned as he tenderly petted your head, opening his mouth wide, and holding his own head still as the Eddie rutted his hips quickly, thrusting his cock deep down the vampire’s throat. 

Your release rippled through you as you screamed into his flesh beneath you. Once you had come down, the metalhead firmly pulled on your hair, bringing you up so your back was to his chest while Steve laid in front of you. 

“W-W-Wait, please.” Both vampires pause as your little pleading voice cuts through their need. “If…If we do this…I want Eddie and Steve. Please…I’ve never…”

As they both blink, you watch as their fangs recede and their soft brown color eyes push forward. Eddie’s arm slides under the pillow around your front, hugging you to him as he kisses your shoulder. 

“Everything’s ok, baby girl. You’re safe. If you don’t feel comfortable or you want to stop just let us know ok?”

“Ok, Daddy. Just go slow please.”

As Steve caressed your cheek, you felt the metalhead lean away from you before a bottle popped open and he was on you again. You gasp at the oddly warm feeling of the lube as he works his fingers to take care of you.

Seeing the nervousness flash through your eyes, the other vampire softly tried to soothe you. 

“Daddy’s right, honey. You’re okay. Everything is okay.”

“I saw your first time with him.”, you smile as you cling to Eddie’s arm around your chest. “I felt how scared you were before.”

“Did you see how long we laid there till he really started moving? I thought I was ruining the mood.”, he chuckles. “But he made me feel safe…loved. I trusted him.”, he coos as his eyes flick briefly behind you. “I know you do to because we can feel it and we trust you, Y/N.”

A tear fell down your face and he quickly wiped it away. 

“I’m so sorry, Steve.”

“Hey, look at me. This isn’t your fault. Say it, honey.”

“What happened to you isn’t my fault.”

“I don’t believe you.”, Eddie added as his stern eyes looked you over. “Say it again.”

“What happened to Steve wasn’t my fault.”, you responded with a bit more confidence making them smile. 

“Good girl, sweetheart. Are you ready?”

“Yes, Daddy.”

“Do you think you can help me, pretty girl?” Taking a hold of one of your wrists, he brought one of your arms behind you and placed your hand on your behind. “Just hold it open for me so I can go slow, ok?”

After nodding, you did what he asked, your breath catching when you felt his cock line up with your entrance. As he began pushing himself into your ass, your body went stiff as your face scrunched in pain. 

“Breathe, Y/N. Relax, honey. It’s going to hurt more if you don’t relax.”, Steve whispers, resting his forehead on yours.

Doing small thrusts behind you, Eddie was pushing himself inch by inch, trusting that you or Steve would stop him should he need to. A small grumble immitted from his chest and his boyfriend reciprocated as his mouth fell open in a silent moan. 

“Fuck, baby. He’s having so much trouble control himself.” As the pretty boy murmurs to you, his hands begin to roam, kneading your breasts down to your center. “God damnit. You’re so wet. Does it feel good now, Y/N?”

Between his words and Eddie’s hold on you as he split you open, you couldn’t open your mouth. Hell, you could barely remember your name as the pain subsided and the need for him to fully take you took over. 

When his hips connected with yours, you whimpered as your head fell forward. 

“Talk to us, baby, please.”

“M-Move. You…you can move now.”

“Hang on, princess. We—fuck—we need to see if you can handle us both. God fucking damn it. Are you fucking kidding me?” 

You knew he wasn’t talking to you because you felt it to. You were so full of him you could only imagine how tight you were squeezing him. 

“Y/N, honey, I’m going to lift your leg over my waist, ok?”

“Ok, Steve.”

Scooting closer to you, his palm tenderly ran along the skin of your thigh as he pulled your leg over his hip causing you and Eddie to groan as your body jostled slightly. Running his mushroom tip along your slit, he collected your slick before slowly pushing his cock into your center. 

Your arm immediately shot out under his own to cling to his shoulder as a bunch of pleasurable feelings overwhelmed your senses. 

“Oh my god.”

Both vampires made subtle motions, pulling back slightly before thrusting all the way inside of you again. 

“Are…Are you ok, Y/N?”, Steve asked, his voice a mix between his and the gruff timbre of his vampire tone.

Nodding aggressively, you encourage them to make you theirs and they don’t disappoint. The obscene sound of skin slapping against skin fills the room mixed with loud moans from all three of you. They both hit a steady rhythm hitting all those sensitive spots inside of you at the same time till you were sobbing as your nails dug into their flesh. 

“Fuck… bite me.”

A different type of want and need flows through them at your request as they snarl under their breath. Lifting your head, you rest your cheek on Steve’s as he doesn’t even hesitate, breaking your skin with his fangs and draining your blood. Eddie tugs on his hair and the boy growls causing the metalhead to roughly grip his face. 

“I didn’t hear you fucking ask. She’s not in charge of your pleasure, I am.” Their black eyes glare at each other before he releases him to continue feeding. “I’ll deal with that attitude later.”

Turning his attention back to you, his demeanor softens. 

“Are you sure about this?”

“Yes, Daddy, please. I trust you. I trust you, baby.”

Biting the other side of your throat, your eyes roll and flutter closed as they pound into you harder, clinging to each other over you as they eat. The bed shakes at their quickened pace and your fingers tangle in Eddie’s hair behind you as you drag your nails down Steve’s back. 

You cum harder than you ever had in your entire life, shuddering against them as your body goes limp. 

“Please…”

Your tone was smaller than before but it practically screamed in their ears as they released you letting your head fall. You watched with hazy, half lidded eyes as their lips mingled together; panting into each other’s mouths as they came.

Steve head fell hard against the pillow as he tried to catch his breath while Eddie hastily healed the wounds on your neck, kissing them softly as they closed.

“Since its both of us breaking your skin, I don’t want to leave you exposed like that. Are you alright, baby?”

After carefully pulling out of you, the vampire in front of you tenderly pushed your hair away from your face as he checked you over. 

“H-Heavy…”

“I’m going to get her something to eat.”

While waiting for him to return, Eddie slowly pulled out of you as well, murmuring apologies as you winced. Running back to the bed, you grimaced at the sandwich Steve held in his hands. 

“I know it seems like a lot but we’ll just take little bites, okay?”

As delicately as he could, the long-haired vampire sat up, bringing you with him so you could utilize him to lean against as you ate and drank the water they gave you. 

“We’re kind of back to the trial and error stage. I was going to bring a coke but I wasn’t sure if that would be too much sugar plus you need to hydrate.”

“Maybe juice next time?”

“Yeah… I don’t know why I didn’t think of that.”

“It’s been a rough couple of weeks.”

You heard them talking but they both sounded so far away. You had never been in this headspace before; the little girl headspace. Even as a child you weren’t really allowed to be one having to grow up pretty quickly in your environment. An adults mindset found you before you entered your double digits and battled with the developing child you had been. Even as a current adult, you felt them go toe to toe constantly but right now in this moment… all you heard was the little girl.

“Baby, what’s going on?”

Blinking, your glassy eyes turned to face them as you scrunched your nose in thought.

“I’ve never…felt little…like this before. My…my mind…is so quiet. I’ve never… I’m sorry for leaving.” The crack in your voice broke their hearts as Steve set everything aside so he could move closer to you and hug you with Eddie. 

“It’s ok, sweetheart. You’re here now and these past few weeks have been scary for all of us.”

“I saw you on the screen. What happened? Were you not eating? Dustin said Steve was struggling.”

Before answering your questions, they took you in their arms and brought you to a bath. After setting you in the warm water and cleaning your skin, they each took a seat near the tub with Steve on the edge and Eddie on the floor reaching over to pet your head. 

“We don’t know how to explain it and, to be honest, we didn’t want to because we didn’t want you to feel like…you HAD to be here. I told you before I always felt you but after having you and losing you—”

“It was like being stabbed again.”, Steve cut in. “Honey, I was in love with you before but after turning and feeling what Eddie had been talking about… I felt like I did when I lost him.”

“Steve, I’m—”

“No, no, baby. I’m not saying it to make you feel bad. I just…all of my feelings were…are… amplified to a 10 and I didn’t want to do anything let alone eat. We did of course but it was never enough. Never enough to fill that hole of you not being here.”

“You complete us, sweetheart. You ARE a part of us and like Stevie said, we aren’t saying this to make you feel bad. If you want to leave again you can and we won’t stop you but even though you’re not a vampire I feel like you felt the same things we did.”

“I knew from the first time I saw you on your stream… I knew that I loved you; both of you. I just thought maybe I was being crazy.”, you giggle making them chuckle as well. “Not being near you or even seeing your faces these past couple of weeks has just killed me. I dreamed about you every night.”

“So did we, honey.”

While Eddie lifted you out of the tub and got you in comfy clothes, Steve rapidly changed the sheets so you three could promptly climb into bed. 

“Thank you for being so gentle with me.”

“Of course, pretty girl. Did you like it? What we did.” When you nod your head, his fingers caress your face and travel up into your hair. “Can you say it?”

“I liked what we did together?”

“What did we do, baby?”

Biting your bottom lip, you blush as he smiles while the other vampire settles in beside you. 

“I liked feeling you and Steve inside at me at the same time.”

“Good. We can show you so much more whenever your ready. Steve and I have experimented with a lot especially when we were starting to delve into the dominate world. Tomorrow I can show you one of those things when I punish this bad boy over here.”

“Me? What did I do?”

“You didn’t ask to feed on her and you gave me attitude. Who controls your pleasure?”

“You do.”

“I’m sorry, what? I didn’t hear that. Did you hear that, baby girl?”

“No, Daddy, I didn’t.”

Steve smirks as you and Eddie grin at him with wide, beautiful, tooth filled smiles. 

“I said you do, Daddy.”

#################

@chelebelletx @mandyjo8719 @nailbatanddungeon

[evvlevie]

Evies optical illusion kit: change your perspective on shifting, this is all a tent. Yes, a tent.

Hi, Hello my dear shifters! It‘s your favourite shifting blogger Evie again and today I want to fix your perspective. Life, Reality and everything is perspective. Everything changes, when perspective comes into play. Did your crush reject you, or did you dodge a bullet? Are you mean to your dog, or are just not letting him die due to chocolate-poisoning? Are you spending too much money, or are you living sustainably? Your thoughts create reality, but perspective interprets it. One of the first things that you learn when you start out shifting is „you can not get stuck in your DR, you can leave whenever you want to“

Something that a lot of people tend to forget, is that you cannot get stuck in your CR either. Reality is not permanent, and reality can not own you as a being, because it’s just a creation from you. How can you get stuck in something you decide to be there or not? Shifters think that shifting is this process, that is so fucking hard in the very first time and after that is all light and breezy because then you‘ll know. They love to say „you‘ll know“. You‘ll know how to shift, you’ll know that it‘s real, you‘ll know how it feels, you‘ll know how it works. And because of that, the first shift is an absolute pain in the ass to achieve but the ones after that are just going to sleep and wake up, right? „Yes, Evie, because it‘s going home from your DR! I won‘t have to make any method or effort to shift to my CR, it‘s the CR! Why would that be hard? I can‘t seem to even fucking leave this place, why would it be any effort to return to it?“

See where I am going with this? If you took that mindset, and flipped it to your momentary situation, maybe you‘d actually shift. If you view this reality as hard to leave and easy to return to, why don‘t you change the perspective to fit your mindset? Pretend this Reality would be your DR and the reality you are trying to shift to was yo ur actual CR. Would you assume it to be hard? Exactly. Realities are all out of the same material. They are all on the same level. This reality might be a DR for someone and they are having trouble entering this one right this second. Sounds bizarre right? That’s because you need to stop viewing a DR as this Empire State Building and your CR as a Tent. All realities are tents. They can all be caves even I don‘t mind. If leaving is easy, than that applies to every reality, not just your DRs because you script that it’s easy to leave. Bestie I hate to tell you this: but if you assume you have a hard time to shift, than that’s you real-time scripting your CR. You call the shots babe. Keep your assumptions in check, keep your thoughts positive and don‘t stand in your own way.

I really hope that this little post was able to help someone out there today! If you need anything don‘t be afraid to ask!

yours in every reality,

Evie &lt;3

[katyawriteswhump]

the power of love part 8 (steddie, stobin, steve whump fic)

Steve has a habit of surviving near death experiences then getting sick for no reason. And Eddie and those fatal bat bites? After an impossible feat of mouth-to-mouth resuscitation from Steve, he’s mysteriously fixed. So, Eddie’s back to being banished, this time with Steve and Robin in tow. Eddie’s healing, but Steve isn’t… and life gets even more confusing, when Eddie develops feelings for Steve, which aren’t entirely unrequited.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11 Part 12

(also on AO3 here where it's still in need of love, if anybody is feeling kind *sobs* ;))

Chapter Eight

Eddie POV continued

“You kissed? And now you can’t wake him?” Robin perches beside Steve on the bunk then rounds on Eddie—genuinely baring her teeth. “I shouldn’t leave you alone with him. It’s like you’re cursing him or something.”

“Woah! Are you accusing me of satanist shit now?” Eddie stops pacing the floorboards, claws his hair.

“Steve? Steve! Oh God, please!” She gently pats him, sinks her face into a hand. “Sorry, Eddie. It’s just… totally unexplainable.” She looks up sharply. “That’s exactly what we should be looking for, right?”

“The unexplainable?” Robin nods. “I should be dead. Steve should be bright and breezy—”

“—and it’s not anything to do with the Upside Down.”

Eddie hums uneasily. Should he share the new theory he’s got brewing? “I dunno. It blows to be a cynic, but—"

“Come on, Eddie! There are so many other possible explanations. If the Upside Down is real, who knows what else is? You’re a maestro of the D and D underworld—work with me here.”

They bounce ideas off each other, including that Steve might’ve succumbed to bad beer. Neither of them buy that one.

“Maybe Steve has some sort of regenerative power,” she says, “like Doctor Who. And you’re leeching it out of him, or something.”

Eddie hoots: “It’s my fault again?”

“No! Look, I sometimes get kinda papa grizzly where Steve is concerned, which is odd, because otherwise, I have almost zero protective instinct. We can’t deny the pattern, though—last time you two got mouth to mouth, he performed miracles and then went downhill fast. This time, uh…”

“I slurped the life out of him again?” Eddie sinks down on the opposite bunk. He thinks back to the kiss, which had been so mind-blowingly awesome. Until it wasn’t. Time to test his number one sucks-balls-squared theory of the day.

He slowly peels his shirt—or, rather, Steve’s now extremely grubby t-shirt—off over his head.

“Ew! Save it for the boys, Munson.”

He runs his palm across his midriff, glances over his shoulder, then hurries closer to the window for better light. Holy shit. “I was still covered in scars yesterday. Even earlier today, there was too much pink among the ink. Now there’s diddly-squat.”

 “So, Steve is still healing you?”

Eddie scrunches the shirt and hurls it across the room. “Yeah, and at this rate, my payback’s gonna kill him! We’ve been so fixated on Steve—what if I’m somehow a font of crappy juju? The big bad wolf the whole world believes I am, after all.”

“No.” Robin strokes Steve’s arm. Eddie’s dying to be close to him, too. Shit, he doesn’t dare! “It’s the water. It gives him some kind of power, and he’s passing it on to you. I mean, it doesn’t explain everything, but…”

Eddie retrieves his shirt, grabs her lifeline and clings to it. “It’s as good an explanation as any.”

“Ooooh!” She turns super-excited. “Perhaps there are fairies in Lover’s Lake? Water nymphs? Or aliens landed there! I’m still mightily suspicious about those clouds and the choppers, because—”

“This is getting absurd, Robin.” She sneers at him, shrugs anyhow. “Look, if we buy the lake theory, what can we do about it? It’s not like we can drag him there. We left the car practically in the next county, and he’s too sick.”

“I could fetch water and bring it back here?”

“Given my recent form, I think it’s best for you to stay with him. Eddie the Banished will don his armour and head once more into the breach.”

“Shakespeare? You listened in English Lit?”

Eddie puffs out his chest, conjuring a bravado he so doesn’t feel. “Still gonna be my year, Buckley.”

His armour is chiefly the shelter of the forest, during several hours of tedious trek. He cycles the last part of his journey, pulling his bandana over his face. When he makes radio contact with Dustin, however, his journey feels more than worth it.

Eddie arranges a meet with the Wheelers at Skull Rock. At least, he believes he does. Dustin communicates in one of his more baffling codes. Eddie is blown away, therefore, when he spots his fave lil’ dude approaching their liaison spot. Dustin defiantly wears his Hellfire Club t-shirt, despite everything.

Dustin throws down his crutches. Eddie rushes forward and flings his arms around him.

“Eddie! You son-of-a-bitch! You scared me so much!”

“Yeeeah, I was pretty scared myself.” Eddie hugs him tight, squeezes his eyes tighter. Tears leak anyhow. “But I’m alive and…” He pulls back, drinks up the sight of Dustin, who sniffs and rubs his red face. “God, it’s good to see you.”

Somebody clears their throat. Eddie jumps a good two inches in the air.

“Hey.” Nancy Wheeler stands a few yards off, offering a sheepish wave, which Eddie returns.

It’s not really surprising she’s there. Someone had to give Dustin a ride, and help him limp through the woods. Sitting beneath the rock, the three of them discuss possible explanations for wtf is going on with Steve.

“Okay, let me get my head around this,” she says. “You think Steve derives some sort of regenerative power from Lover’s Lake? And he’s sick? Right now?” She frets her lip. “I should go to him.”

“Uuuuuh, no need. We’re coping all right.” Eddie almost laughs out loud at how badly he doesn’t want her anywhere near Steve. He’d never in his wildest dreams have believed he would go toe-to-toe as a love rival with Nancy Wheeler.

She shakes her head. “There’s gotta be a connection with the Upside Down. This is bad. Really bad.”

“Not necessarily,” says Dustin. “I like Eddie’s hypothesis. There’s no logical reason why all the supernatural shit in this town, let alone this world, is evil.”

“It was Robin’s hypothesis,” admits Eddie.

“Whatever,” says Dustin. “If a bad alternate dimension can bleed into ours, maybe a good dimension can too.”

“I suppose,” said Nancy. Eddie nearly agrees with her, but can’t quite be that gracious. “Either way, if that lake fixes Steve somehow, we need to act quick.”

Nancy heads off to collect lake water. Once she’s gone, Eddie feels able to share his other Steve-related issue: “Didn’t want to divulge this in front of Wheeler, but… Uh, Steve and I got mouth-to-mouth again.”

“You had to perform CPR on him? I had no idea you knew—”

“There’s other reasons that lips meet.” Eddie puckers his lips and crosses his eyes, totally silly. 

Dustin stares at him, his mouth hanging open. “Oh!”

“Yeah. Theeeeen… he basically passed out.”

“Whut?”

“Look, don’t ask me to explain it! I mean, I like him. I really like him. Equally implausible, I think he likes me, but…” Aargh! His feelings for Steve are more tortuous than pleasurable right now. What’s more, the distance between them makes armouring his heart a teeny-weeny bit easier. 

“But?” Dustin bobs up and down on his butt.

“If I’m making him sicker, I should make myself scarce. I still wonder if I’m the bad apple here. Flayed… or whatever. It would neatly continue the sordid tale that is my life. Plus, if Hopper’s back, I bet he can get Steve off the hook for aiding and abetting, or whatever. Steve can go home, get the help he needs.”

“Hopper’s got his own problems, dude.” Dustin scratches his head beneath his baseball cap, kinda nervy. “There’s this army colonel in town, O’Sullivan, who’s pretty much Vecna levels of evil. He knows about Brenner and Hawkins Lab, and… Long story, cut short. He’s out to kill Eleven.”

“You gotta be shitting me!”

“That was my line when I found out. Hopper and El are hiding out, waiting for a safe opportunity to get outta Dodge. The band of the banished gets bigger every day.”

“Well, this exile should return to being a solo act. Steve and I absolutely would not work in the real world.”

“Huh?” Dustin wrinkles his nose. “You’re different—that’s what makes it fun. Even Suzie and I don’t like all the same music, for example. She’s got a real downer on Debbie Gibson.”

“Then maybe I should date Suzie,” mumbles Eddie, avoiding Dustin’s scrutiny. “In reality, Steve and I are from different planets. I’ve seen his house—his folks are loaded.”

“You can’t hold Steve’s parents against him. They’re literally never there for him. His Dad travels tons, and they stopped taking him with him when he was, like, eleven, because…” Dustin’s jaw drops again.

“Because what?” prompts Eddie. 

“Steve stopped travelling with his parents because he started getting sick every time.”

“So, he got travel sick. So do tons of kids. So what?”

“I honestly don’t know! But it supports your theories concerning his proximity to the lake. Sort of.” Dustin whacks his cap against the rock. “Jesus-mother-effing-son-of-a-bitch! I am literally dying to return to a world where I can trust the laws of science.”

Steve POV

1979

Getting himself up in the morning, getting himself to the school bus-stop alone—that only sucked.

It was the emptiness of the night that freaked him out.

Steve stayed up too late, of course he did. He was nearly twelve years old, with nobody to tell him what to do. He ate sweets and watched grown-up television, which got boring pretty fast. When he finally plucked up the courage to go to bed, he’d huddle under the covers, muffling his ears. It never drowned out that horrible, screaming quiet.

Who knew silence could be so loud?

He missed his mom, and it hurt, too. Knowing she chose to leave him behind. 

He’d hated travelling, because in the last year, he’d always got ill. Like, not just travel sick, but fevers and chills and headaches and stomach cramps, always “ruining” his father’s trips. 

Inevitably, his dad decreed that he must stay behind, and the first couple of times, his mom stayed home with him. Then she’d told him his father needed her more. What did that even mean? Steve really, really needed her, simply to be there. Somewhere in the house.

She wasn’t. 

The hours would stretch on, while he was too scared to close his eyes, until…

The monsters barged out of the closet, rioting through his nightmares. Then THEY arrived, with their smooth, smiling face and whirlpool eyes. That wordlessly singing voice, trickling through the waters, reassuring him everything would be all right…

In the morning, shuffling to the bus-stop, he remembered them. Clearer than the monsters, even. Oh man, he could be so childish and unhip sometimes.

“Steve? Steve! Please wake up! You’ve been asleep for hours.”

A groan escapes him, and then: “Momma?” Somehow, he knows it’s not her. “Dad?”

He opens his eyes. 

Oh shit. 

No, that’s not where his life is now. He’s sure as hell not eleven-years-old! Robin looks faintly amused, and also like she wants to thump him: “Gonna give you a pass on that this once, Steve, then go bleach my brain.”

Part 9

...

tags: @estrellami-1 @kal-ology (thank you, thank you, thank you!) If anybody else would like to be tagged on this fic or any of my writing, please let me know :) Reblogs, comments and likes also very much appreciated :) Thank you for reading so far :)

(also part of my steve whump fic series on AO3)

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 10 Part 11

[separatist-apologist]

We Never Go Out Of Style

Could end in burning flames or paradise

Summary: When Gwyn breaks up with her boyfriend on the eve of Nesta's destination wedding, Nesta Archeron has only one objective: set Gwyn up with her high school crush.

Note: Based on this tweet from @heathermcwrites: "One of my bridesmaids just broke up with her bf who was supposed to come to my wedding & I was sad for her for about 3 seconds until I remembered that her crush will also be at the wedding (single) and I'm now more committed to this 2nd chance romance than to my own marriage."

"I should also note that this is a destination wedding so there are EVEN MORE opportunities for uh…shenanigans"

Read More: Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | AO3

The shrill ringing of Gwyn’s phone dragged her from sleep. She twisted, peeling her cheek from Azriel’s naked chest, to fumble for the phone on her nightstand.

“I swear to God,” Azriel muttered, eyes still closed as she brought the bright screen towards her blinking face, “If it’s Jonathon, I’m going to commit a felony.”

It was Jonathon. Illuminated in the otherwise pitch black room, both her and Azriel stared for a moment. 

“I won’t—”

“Might as well,” he grumbled. “Tell him you’ve moved on.”

She scoffed. Moved on with who? Him? Still, Gwyn hit the green answer button, if only to beg him to stop calling her.

“What do you want?” she said by way of greeting as Azriel wrapped muscular arms tight against her. He burrowed his face into her hair, huffing out a breath of irritation. 

“What do I want? I want to talk to you–”

“It’s two in the fucking morning,” Azriel snarled, loud enough for Jonathon to stop what he was saying. Gwyn poked him hard in the stomach, forced out of bed to keep Azriel from saying anything else. Azriel watched, propped up on his elbows with an expression hidden in the darkness while she threw on her tank top and shorts from the night before. She didn’t need to see him to feel his disapproval. 

“Who was that?”

“Cassian,” Gwyn replied easily, apparently a practiced liar now. There was no way she was telling him she’d immediately jumped into bed with someone new. She knew exactly what Jonathon would say about that. How he’d twist things to make her the bad guy, telling all their friends she’d cheated on him or worse. “It is two in the morning. Can we talk about this later? Like when I’m home?” she added, pushing open the balcony door. The air was cool and breezy and perfect. She swallowed a breath of it, dropping into one of the wicker patio chairs and propping her feet up on the railing. 

“I want to talk now. It’s ten my time and all I can think about is how we left things.”

“Of course you want to talk,” she snapped, immediately irritated. “I had a nine hour flight and am exhausted, but since you’re awake, I should be too?”

“You’re putting words in my mouth, Gwyneth,” he snapped. “It’s ten your time, too, technically. I don’t know how you’re even still sleeping.”

“I just told you I was tired,” she retorted. What was she doing? The worlds hottest man was currently half asleep in her bed and she was sitting on a balcony arguing with her ex.

“Have you been working out? Did you go for—”

“Are you seriously asking me if I’ve gone to the gym?” Gwyn demanded as the glass door pushed open behind her. Az padded out in a clean pair of shorts, his handsome face twisting in a scowl. 

Hang up on him, Azriel mouthed, leaning against the balcony casually. 

“Sorry for worrying about you. I want to take care of you, Gwyn. I was thinking that you should tell Nesta you can’t do her wedding and come home so we can fix this—”

“I’m not coming home and there’s nothing to fix,” Gwyn interrupted snappishly. “I don’t want to do this anymore. I’m asking you to stop calling and texting me.”

“Because there’s someone else?” he demanded, picking a fight at the last possible second to keep her on the phone. It was his little trick and this time Gwyn wasn’t falling for it.

“Even if there was, it’s none of your business anymore. Stop calling me. I mean it. This is my best friends wedding. It has nothing to do with you.” And then she hung up before he could argue, silencing her phone just for good measure. He wouldn’t stop calling until he was given an answer that satisfied him. It was clear he meant to make this vacation all about him and if Gwyn wasn’t so worried he’d call Nesta and start more problems, she would have blocked him entirely.

Azriel offered her his full attention. “Did he really ask if you went to the gym?” His tone was dark and angry, like he was personally offended on her behalf. Men, she grumbled privately, rising from her chair.

“Like you wouldn’t worry the same,” she said, taking her irritation out on him. Azriel followed her back into the bedroom, closing the door behind them quietly.

“If you want to work out, I know just the thing,” he said, catching her from behind and pulling her into his body. One hand slid up her stomach to cup her breast, tugging at the nipple.

“Aren’t you wrung out?” she asked, thinking once again of Jonathon. Once was always enough, and good enough to wait several days in between. He thought constant fucking was pedestrian which had always bothered Gwyn, given her sex drive was pretty high. 

Azriel’s laugh was dark. “Hardly. It’s been four hours and I find I’m ravenous again.”

Jesus Christ he was so hot. Gwyn twisted in his hold, facing him in the dark.

“And if I did want to work out…how would you help?”

“I’d bounce you on my cock until you were breathless and coated in sweat,” he replied easily, nipping her earlobe with his teeth. “And then I’d flip you over and start again. Ass in the air, face in the pillow.”

Her legs were practically shaking while he pulled that tank top back over her head. Hands replaced the fabric, sliding up her skin to cup her breasts. 

“Is that all?” she asked breathlessly, arching into his touch. Azriel ground his cock against her ass, already erect. Tweaking at her nipple, he chuckled darkly.

“Not impressed? Tell me if I embarrass you.”

He gave her no time to offer a quippy response. Azriel’s hand wrapped around her throat as he turned her around, kissing her roughly while his fingers pressed against her windpipe. Gwyn didn’t think she’d ever been so wet in her life, and Azriel had barely touched her.

Settling between her legs, he rolled his hips, letting his erection rub between the fabric. It was what she needed, the friction lighting up her brain. She raked her fingers through his dark, thick hair, tugging at the strands until he groaned. Hardly unaffected, she thought smugly. There was something thrilling about whatever was happening between them. It was devoid of the usual awkwardness that came with dating—Azriel didn’t like her beyond her body, which meant Gwyn didn’t have to worry if he thought she was weird or too freaky or whatever other things got in her way. 

She could yank at his pants, demanding he reveal his gorgeous cock and he didn’t make her feel bad about it. He merely repaid the favor, all but ripping off her shorts before flipping them over so she could sink against the heavy, thick length of him. Gwyn exhaled a slow breath of relief, letting him fill her to the point of splitting. 

“Fuck,” he panted beneath her, hands holding her hips. “You’re so fucking tight.”

She didn’t care—men always said that. What Gwyn cared about was that first wet slide of his cock as he lifted her up only to yank her back down. He treated her carelessly, like she was something durable, something that didn’t break so easily. He fucked her the way she’d so often tried to get Jonathon to with little success. 

It made her like Azriel, in a weird way. Like he saw beyond whatever existed externally and just understood instinctively they wanted the same things. Or maybe Gwyn was merely projecting that long held crush and Azriel didn’t give a fuck whether she enjoyed herself or not, so long as she was.

“I’m going to fill you up and fuck you again,” he whispered, pulling her out of her thoughts. “Everyone’s going to think you’re jetlagged, but you’ll know, won’t you?” She whimpered, her tits bouncing in time with his vicious thrusts. She had her nails pressed so tight against his chest she might have drawn blood. 

He didn’t seem to care, if his bruising touch was any indication. Not when his thumb met the apex of her thighs, rubbing over her slick clit like he’d done in the bathroom. It was all so second nature to him, getting her off like it was his only pleasure in life. Gwyn had been half prepared to fake it, had already begun to before he started rubbing. Their eyes met and she realized he knew what she was up to.

“Not with me,” he growled. “If I’m doing something you don’t like, you need to tell me.”

“Okay,” she breathed, heart pounding in her throat. Had anyone ever been hotter before that moment? She didn’t think so. Not when she came around him with a soft cry and certainly not when he pulled her off him just as he’d promised to put her on her hands and knees.

The change in position made her toes curl, her body lock. Azriels cock was massive, thick enough it made her ache and long enough he was all but banging up against the natural barrier of her body. He wielded it not like a weapon despite each punching thrust, but like a tool meant to drag every inch of pleasure from her. 

And god it was working. Azriel wrapped her hair around his fist, arching her neck so he could squeeze again. Teeth scraped over her skin as he whispered, “Are you going to be my good girl and come for me again?”

She clenched hard around him, whining her assent. Gwyn, who had never once come from penetration alone, was writhing as the head of his cock slid over and over and over against some soft part of her pussy, touching as if it were his tongue against his clit.

She came with a strange, jerking violence, overwrought and too-sensitive.

“Please—”

“You’ll take what I give you,” he replied, too breathless to be truly believable. Gwyn buried her face in the bed, coming a third time as Azriel did for the first, groaning loudly as he pushed deep inside her. 

“Fuck me,” he whispered, sounding as if he’d just run a marathon. She looked at the clock on the nightstand, a holdover from a time where people didn’t carry phones in their pocket.

4:50.

She swallowed. It felt like five minutes. 

He pushed her into the bed, pulling out and unwrapping the condom she hadn’t even realized he’d been wearing. Hardly a positive sign, given she hadn’t even really known him for longer than a day.

“Want breakfast?” he whispered into the rapidly lightning dark, pulling her against his body when he collapsed to the bed. “I’m starving.”

“I have something you can eat,” she said without thinking about it. Azriel turned his head, grinning.

“Don’t mind if I do.”

By the time Gwyn and Azriel made their way out of the their shared suit, it was nearly eight in the morning. Azriel had gone down on her, taking his sweet ass time given she’d just come three times on his cock—and then again when she tried to shower, he’d fucked her up against the glass, massive hand wrapped around her slim throat. 

It seemed like they weren’t the only ones who’d been up all night having sex. Lucien Vanserra was staring absently at a wall, fork in hand. His broad chest was littered with teeth marks and his hair was suspiciously tangled, as if he’d just managed to get to the buffet–and it had been rough. Elain seemed fine, bright eyed and cheerful, talking to Arina Vanserra animatedly. 

Nesta, too, had that same lust fogged look Gwyn prayed she didn’t. 

Azriel peeled off to eat with Rhys, casual and unbothered. Like there was nothing strange between them. Like she hadn’t eaten her out until she all but saw God. It left Gwyn to drop beside Nesta and put her head on Nesta’s shoulder. 

“Sleep well?”

“Enough,” Gwyn agreed, wishing she could tell Nesta this. It was Nesta’s wedding and Gwyn would be damned if she fucked it up with her personal drama. She very much doubted Azriel, sitting with his back to her four tables away, wanted her to blab all about their very casual arrangement, besides.

“I got none. It’s like Cassian doesn’t need sleep,” Nesta grumbled, watching her fiance join Rhys and Azriel at their table. All three of them were shirtless and tattooed and had captured the attention of half the women in the room without ever meaning to. Both Gwyn and Nesta fell silent for a moment, drinking in the muscular forms of the men eating, totally oblivious that they were the object of a lot of different fantasies.

Gwyn hadn’t thought it was possible to feel any more arousal. Her pussy was all but bruised from Azriel’s attention and yet she still found herself imagining herself laid out before him, his own personal feast.

“I need to go into town,” Nesta told Gwyn, a frown on her face. “They are short some of the liquor we ordered. I don’t want to ask Eris for it, so–”

“I’ll go,” Gwyn said quickly. “Don’t worry about it. Just give me a list, I’ve got this covered.”

Nesta’s face collapsed with relief. “Really?”

“What good is your maid of honor if I let you run yourself ragged. Give me your list and then join Cassian out on the beach.”

Nesta nodded. “I’ll text it to you, Split it with Azriel, while you’re at it. I know Cassian won’t make him do anything but shots while we’re down here.”

Gwyn glanced back to Az, who turned his head, having caught them talking about him. “What’s his deal, anyway?” she asked when he turned back around.

Nesta was smiling, likely at Cassian though Gwyn was still staring at the bunching muscles in Azriel’s tattooed back. 

Nesta shrugged. “He’s just…Az. I don’t know how else to describe him. Why?”

God, Gwyn could never admit that her crush on Azriel was back in full force. Nesta would try and play matchmaker, and where would that leave Gwyn? Embarrassed. She bet Az had a line of women down the block, all waiting on him.

“He’s just quiet.”

“God, did he go in and immediately lock himself in his room?”

Hardly.

“Yeah,” she replied, unsure what else she could say. Certainly not that he’d been in bed with her all night. It didn’t matter. Gwyn’s phone rang shrilly, drawing Azriel’s attention back to her and Nesta’s attention away from Az. They both peered down at the screen.

“Jonathon?” Nesta asked. “What’s he want?”

Her heart pounded anxiously in her chest. There was no escaping him, not after this morning. She needed to just face the music.

“Send me your list,” Gwyn said, rising from her chair. She could feel Azriel’s eyes burning against her skin. “I’ll be back.”

Gwyn answered the phone just outside the hall. Warm, morning air slid over her skin as she said, “Hello?”

“Are you awake now, Gwyneth?” 

God, she thought she hated him in that moment. “Or should I try again in five hours?”

“You should stop calling,” she hissed, walking towards the massive courtyard where the fountain stood. “Like I’ve asked you repeatedly.”

“I need to talk to you. Is now a good time?”

“No!” she exclaimed angrily. “I’m trying to help Nesta with her wedding and yet somehow, I’m still worrying about you! You have managed to make this vacation all about you! What could you possibly—”

Her phone was pulled from her hand before she could finish. Azriel, shirtless, beautiful Azriel, put her phone to his ear.

“You don’t understand the word no?” he asked in that deep, dark voice of his. He didn’t wait for Jonathon to respond. “Let me explain. It means no. Don’t call her again.”

He hung up before Gwyn could warn him. Instead, she smacked him in his rock hard stomach. “Why would you do that?”

“Because I hate him,” Azriel replied smoothly. “And you’re too nice.”

“I don’t think either of them are good reasons,” she snapped. “He’s going to keep calling–”

“Might as well give him my number, then. He can beg me for a date.”

She looked up at him, drinking in his unwavering confidence with a mixture of awe and irritation. “I didn’t think he was your type.”

Azriel smirked. “You don’t know everything about me.”

“I don’t know anything about you,” she said with exasperation, yanking her phone back out of his hand. Already, she had a text from Jonathon.

I know that wasn’t Cassian. Are you seeing someone? 

She ignored it. “Are you asking to get to know me? You only have to ask.”

“Don’t do that again,” she warned. “You just cause problems.”

Azriel’s easy going smile slid off his face. “Fuck—I’m sorry.”

Gwyn stood there, blinded by the early morning sun, staring up at him. She was waiting for him to qualify that apology, to offer some excuse. Instead, Azriel waited to see if she’d forgive him. 

Gwyn blinked. “It’s fine. You were trying to help.”

“Don’t be so easy on me,” he murmured, his eyes so uncomfortably soft. Like he liked her. Gwyn was projecting and she knew it would only get hurt if she couldn’t find something wrong with him. 

“You want to help? Nesta has a list of things she needs done. You could help me with that.”

Azriel grinned.

“Hand it over.”

AZRIEL:

Azriel had told Gwyn to meet him in front of the resort but he hadn’t told her why. She found out that evening, stepping out of the sliding glass doors with wide, teal eyes. She was so fucking pretty it made his chest ache. It had been a day running around and checking on their venue, harassing Eris Vanserra while he tried to feel up his wife, and a bunch of other little tasks he didn’t care about.

What he cared about was the red haired woman doing it with him. Gwyn was filled with information about Nesta—and occasionally Cassian—and if he was careful, would tell him about her, too. Nothing deep—she taught history at Velaris University, which Azriel had thought was a pretty nice university, though he didn’t dare ask. She’d told him about her syllabus, as if Azriel knew jack shit about antiquity.

He bet she would have told him if he’d asked, though. Gwyn was very clearly passionate about history. He liked that more than he was willing to admit. Every girl he spent significant time with wanted to talk about was her socials and what she did to maintain them. He knew Gwyn had an instagram because he’d started following her that afternoon, but it was hardly curated and he knew she wasn’t making money off it.

She halted, letting him check her out in her short shorts and her white top that revealed fair skin every time she took a breath. Her hair spilled over her shoulders, catching copper in the bright sunlight.

“What is that?” she asked. Azriel looked down at the motorcycle he’d managed to dig out, spending far too much money hoping to impress her. He couldn’t tell if it was working.

“It’s a bike,” he replied, working hard to make himself sound casual and cool when in truth he felt nervous as fuck. “You coming still?”

“On that?”

He looked back and the sleek black and red bike sitting silent just behind before offering her up a helmet. “Do you want to walk?”

“No, but…” she bit her bottom lip. “Is it safe?”

“It is if I’m driving it. I can drive anything,” he added, bragging just a little. “I won’t let anything happen to you.”

She hesitated, fingers twitching before she took that helmet. Azriel caught her hand.  

“Trust me,” he added softly. 

Magic words. Gwyn nodded, jamming that helmet onto her head with a smile. “If we die, I’m going to haunt you.”

“I’ll be dead, too,” he reminded her. “So we’ll just be hanging out in the after-life.”

She wrapped her arms around his torso, poking him in the side. “I’ll make you miserable for all eternity, then.”

“You could try,” he replied, revving the engine to life. It was so loud, the smoke from the back nearly choking them both and yet she was on that seat, pressed tight against him and that was all he’d wanted. An excuse to touch her without being obvious. 

They left the resort behind and Azriel showed off just a little, weaving in and out of traffic like it was nothing, if only to feel her hold him tighter. He knew he was down bad, that he needed to get himself together before he did something utterly foolish.

But fuck, when was the last time anyone had made him feel like this? Giddy and happy, like he had literal butterflies living in his gut? It was his endless problem—he always fell too hard, too fast. She was still dealing with her ex and he was trying to figure out how to convince her he was worth her time.

The island was bigger than he’d thought and built on a steep, long-dominant volcanic slope. As they rode into the dusky evening, they passed a winery Azriel very much intended to bring her back to just as soon as he had a good enough reason to do so. They passed farmers herding sheep before they were back in the main city, if it could even be called that. No time seemed to have passed, except for the people on the cobblestone streets that moved about in jeans and cotton blends. Azriel nearly crashed, craning his neck to look up at the spire tower of massive black church set in the middle of the city square, momentarily awed by the construction.

He wasn’t the only one. He could feel Gwyn twisting this way and that, looking at the terracotta houses and the vibrant awnings hanging in front of restaurants that were likely centuries old. He was pleased to have brought her, even if they were trying to use Vanserra’s money to place a very expensive order of champagne. 

He cut the engine in front of the vendor, pulling his helmet off with what he hoped was elegant grace Gwyn hopped off, too, flipping her hair out of the helmet carelessly. His cock immediately stirred to life, the image branded in his brain. Her bright, happy smile soothed that wildness and dragged him back to reality.

“That was fun,” she breathed, pressing a hand to his chest. He caught her wrist, pulling her in for a soft kiss. 

“You should see me in the states, if you liked that,” he breathed, too stupid for his own good. Gwyn didn’t flinch away, didn’t do anything but look up at him with those ocean blue eyes.

“Yeah? I think I might like that.”

He could have floated away. He kissed her again, slowly–like he had the right to. “I’ll hold you to that,” he murmured, releasing her despite every instinct begging him not to. 

She smiled and when he put his hand on her shoulder, guiding her into the old building, Gwyn didn’t pull away. They looked like lovers, like they’d come not because their two best friends had accidentally fallen in love, but because they’d fallen in love.

He wanted that reality so badly it made his teeth ache. 

The owner spoke decent English which was lucky given neither he nor Gwyn spoke a word of Italian. Negotiations seemed to move smoother when Azriel pulled out the car Eris had given them and slid it over an mahogany counter. Gwyn had written out the number of cases of champagne Nesta wanted and google translate helped them with the rest. They’d offered up the address, but Azriel suspected he and Rhys might have to come back, maybe with the younger Vanserra, to carry cases of liquor into a rental van. 

“Want to get dinner?” he asked her impulsively when they finished, high on both his success and spending an evening in Italy with the most beautiful woman he’d ever seen. Gwyn looked around, pointing just down the street to a patio illuminated by hanging string lights.

It was romantic as shit. That was Azriel’s real problem. He had no idea how to wine and dine a woman outside of the bedroom. His good looks did most of the work for him, maybe a shallow thing to admit given Gwyn had such an interesting personality. She’d worked for it and Az…well, he had his six pack, didn’t he? 

They settled in an outdoor patio, sitting across from one another and surveying the menu. It was helpfully in English and Italian. She ordered pasta.

Azriel ordered a pizza. He couldn’t help himself. When in Rome, right? 

“So,” Gwyn began, lips pressed to a glass of wine. “What happened after school?”

He held his own glass in his hand. “What do you mean?”

“Rhys and Cassian went to college,” she began, unaware of his stomach immediately began to sink. Here it was. All the reasons he wasn’t right for her, starting with that diploma. He’d heard it all before. “And you were on the soccer team with Lucien, weren’t you?”

He scoffed. “I was good but Vanserra was…” 

He could begrudgingly admit Vanserra was great. Gwyn took a drink, waiting for him to respond. Azriel took a breath, swallowing the urge to snap at her. 

“My mom got sick,” he admitted. “And I’m good with cars. I meant to go, but after a year at the shop I figured what was the point? I was already doing what I liked and a degree wasn’t going to change that.”

“How many shops do you have?” she asked, catching him by surprise. Interest shone in those teal eyes and Azriel, so used to women trying to cajole him into feeling bad about skipping out on a mountain of debt for a business degree, didn’t respond immediately.

“Four. Five, if we keep up our metrics through the year.”

“That’s incredible,” she breathed. “You must be so proud.”

He was. Azriel nodded, certain he must look like a cartoon character with its heart beating outside its chest. Could she see it? Azriel was so fucked, saved only by a waiter dropping off their food. 

Gwyn took a bite of her food, noodles wrapped around a fork. Her eyes fluttered shut and Azriel had to cross his legs to keep his cock from stirring to life. 

“Taste good?” he asked, leaning forward on his elbows breathlessly. He didn’t even realize he’d put himself in his pizza, staining the sleeve of his shirt, until her eyes snagged on the mistake.

He wasn’t embarrassed.

“How do you do that?” she asked him curiously.

“Do what?” he replied, thinking she meant his careless actions.

“Make everything so unspeakably hot?”

Oh. 

“You think my elbow in sauce is unspeakably hot?” he teased. 

“No, that was dorky as fuck. Thank you for reminding me you’re still a mere mortal. I meant the way you talk.” 

He waited expectantly for her to follow that up.

Gwyn sighed. “Taste good?” She mimicked his voice, trying to sound sultry while making him sound like a serial killer. Azriel laughed, head thrown back.

Gwyn crossed her arms over her chest. “Well, it’s not exactly like that.”

Azriel couldn’t smother his smile as he leaned forward again, this time avoiding his food which he very much intended to eat just as soon as she stopped being so unbearably cute. 

“For the record,” he said softly, catching the way she shivered despite the warmth. “You taste incredible.”

“Jesus Christ,” she whispered. “We’re in public, Az.”

“Eat your dinner, Gwyn, so I can eat mine.”

She narrowed her eyes but Azriel was satisfied. He’d eat his food.

And then he’d eat her. 

[joaquinwhorres]

Tailspin - Part 4 (Fanboy Garcia x F!OC)

SUMMARY ››››› Having grown up just across the bridge from North Island, Carolina Alvarez has been told her whole life to stay away from the Top Gun boys. And for the most part, she has. That is, until Fanboy catches her putting quarters in the jukebox at The Hard Deck and initiates a game of cat and mouse that ends with her exactly where she swore she’d never be.

PAIRING ››››› Mickey “Fanboy” Garcia x F!OC

WORD COUNT ››››› 5,592

WARNINGS ››››› None?

MASTERLIST ››››› Here

A/N ››››› The moment you've all been waiting for. Unless you've somehow managed to avoid all of the spoilers I have on my blog about this.

She didn't respond to any of his texts.

His calls went unanswered too, the line ringing only once before routing to voicemail each of the three times he tried.

But it wasn't until the small Read 10:59 AM appeared on Bob's phone that he started to accept that Phoenix might be right. 

His face fell as he stared at the screen for a moment longer before handing the phone back to Bob. "Thanks," he said, the word sounding flat and hollow. 

The other man's mouth made silent attempts to form words as he accepted the phone, only stopping when Fanboy shook his head, relieving Bob of the sense of duty to respond. Bob sighed, pressing his lips together in a commiserative frown as he placed his phone upside down on the bar in front of him. "I'm sorry," he finally managed. 

"Jesus, he doesn't need your condolences," Hangman sighed loudly from where he lay across the leather couch nearby. The accompanying eye roll was practically audible. 

Bob side-eyed Hangman, his lips twisting in contempt.

"Oh, come on," Hangman scoffed as he rose into a seated position, throwing a hand out to gesture towards Fanboy. "You're acting like you just found out your mother died just 'cause some ex from five years ago who blocked you."

The words either didn't reach Fanboy or rolled right off him because his attention remained fixed on the phone in front of Bob. 

"I just don't get it," Fanboy murmured. 

"She's. Not. Interested," Hangman asserted, ignoring the warning looks from the other aviators. "Get over it or give up the dream that you're going on this mission." The blonde shook his head as he stood up. "If I stay at this pity party any longer, I'm going to start growing ovaries," he quipped, heading towards the door.

"Like you could handle them," Phoenix called after his retreating form. Hangman didn't slow down or even acknowledge her statement though as he disappeared out to the hallway. 

Bob shot Phoenix a smile as she shook her head. "Asshole."

"As much as I hate to say it, he has a point," Payback said gently from his seat next to Fanboy. "You've been off your game up there."

"I–"

"Come on man," Payback cut him off with a sympathetic smile. "I've seen what you can do. You were the best Wizzo in our class."

"I know," Fanboy said, hanging his head. "I just can't shake it." 

Payback pressed his lips together, meeting Bob's eyes over Fanboy's hunched form. The other WSO widened his eyes meaningfully, the loss for what to do written clearly on his face. Payback jerked his head in dismissal, and Bob slid from his seat, patting Fanboy's back once before heading over to Harvard and Fritz. 

With a quick glance up to the heavens and prayer for help, Payback scooted closer to Fanboy. "Look, do you still trust her?" he asked, keeping his voice gentle and low. 

Fanboy looked up, meeting Payback's eyes, and he could see that his closest friend here—the only one who knew just how little sense this all made—was approaching the end of his rope. 

"Yeah, of course." 

"Then trust that whatever reason she has for not wanting to talk to you is a good one." 

It was a solid piece of logic, easily traced back to the golden ring that encircled Payback's left finger. Fanboy could practically hear Neema's voice in the advice, reminding him that Caro had never done anything without a reason. While each of her decisions were explained with a breezy sentence or sharp quip, there had always been a thorough and conscientious thought process behind her actions.

But she had always offered up her reasonings willingly. They had never been so much as veiled, let alone something he had to pry from her. 

And it was that thought that led him to shake his head, eyes peering appealingly at Payback, urging him to understand.  "I can't," he whispered, the admission coming out pained and apologetic. 

Payback didn't have the time to do much more than sigh before there was a shuffling at the door that drew their attention. An administrative officer stood in the doorway, clipboard in hand. "Coyote, Payback, Fanboy, you're next." 

The three men nodded, Coyote using Yale's distractedness to spin a shot into the goal before backing up, grinning from the foosball table. Payback slid from his seat, clapping Fanboy on the shoulder as he did so. "Come on. We'll figure this out after we go make an old man do some push ups." 

"198…" Hondo counted, following it up with a loud, "Down!" 

Fanboy wasn't sure what hurt more: his muscles that had been battered from the flying and subsequent push ups, his ego at having Maverick continue to best them despite having no WSO or wingman, or his conscience for being the reason that Payback and Coyote were both sweating next to him. 

Because he couldn't stop thinking about it.

About that look on her face when he told her he'd missed her. 

About the stupid gray letters that appeared on Bob's phone. 

About the last time he'd seen her and how he should have just said it. 

"200!" Hondo announced. "You're good to—" 

The rest of his sentence was lost as Fanboy pushed himself up off the ground and onto his feet, taking off down the tarmac.

"Fanboy!" Payback called after him, but the backseater didn't stop, starting towards the building with more purpose than he'd even shown in the goddamn air. 

Ahead of him, Hangman grinned, the sun glinting off his golden hair. "You know, if you ever get her to talk to you, make sure to thank her for me. For taking out the competition." 

Fanboy's jaw set, his hands clenching into fists, but he continued on and into the showers, to wash away–even temporarily–the feeling of failure. But even the scalding water couldn't burn it away, and he emerged from the showers feeling somehow worse than when he went in.

"Fanboy." 

The sudden sound of his name caused his heart to jump in his chest, jerking around to see Phoenix's form waiting beside the door. She pushed herself away from the wall to fall in line with him. 

"What was that?"

He shook his head, turning back around so he could head towards the debrief room early for some peace and quiet before Hangman, Harvard, and Yale came down. 

"Hey," Phoenix called after him, catching up with long strides. "I'm serious. Calling the wrong break is the kind of error that gets you washed out of flight school."

Fanboy shook his head, looking away from Phoenix. He could still feel her gaze on him, insistent and intense. "I know," he mumbled. 

"Look, I've already got my hands full with Rooster; I can't have you spinning out too," Phoenix sighed, hand pushing at his arm to turn him towards her, finally getting him to stop. "So explain it to me–why is an ex you haven't seen or spoken to in the past five years so in your head?" 

Fanboy sighed, running a hand over his head, the short hairs tickling his palm. His eyes rested on a photo of a pilot grinning in the seat of an old F-14. 

"Because when I left, she loved me, and now she looks terrified of me. Something happened."

He chanced a glance at Phoenix's face finding the pilot staring at him with furrowed brows. "Five years happened." 

He shook his head. "It's bigger than that. I mean, if you're right, she blocked me a while ago, and I don't know what I did." 

"Maybe you didn't do anything," Phoenix shook her head. It was his time to look at her confused. "Maybe it isn't about you. Maybe she needed to block you to move on. Maybe she has."

The sentence hit him like a punch to the gut, knocking the air out of his lungs. It was a moment before he could breathe again. 

"But why wouldn't she just say that?"

"I don't know," Phoenix shrugged. "But you need to figure out a way to let this go and get your head on straight. We need you on this mission." 

Her last sentence was lost to him though because finally someone said something actually actionable.

He needed to get his head on straight. And that's exactly what he would do.

Renew Chiropractic was a six minute drive from base.

Six minutes.

For the past week, he had only been one well-timed traffic light or random turn down a side street away from seeing her on one of his runs. Instead, it took a Google Search and a four hour wait until his scheduled appointment slot. 

His head was still reeling with the revelation as he pushed open the glass front door, entering the serene chiropractic office. Everything about the room was meant to be calming: the soft jade color of the walls, the essential oil blend puffing out of the diffuser, and the soothing nature sounds bubbling from the speaker. Even the row of empty chairs along the wall looked more plush than one might expect from a doctor's office. 

None of it seemed to have any effect on him though, each muscle in his body still tense and on alert as he approached the front desk. 

A tall, thin black man with wire-rimmed glasses looked up as he approached, eyes widening for a second upon seeing Fanboy in front of him. 

"Hi, can I help you?" the receptionist asked. The middle-aged white woman sat next to him cast him a puzzled look before her eyes too wandered to Fanboy. She sat up a bit straighter in her seat, hazel eyes narrowed slightly as she followed his progress towards them. 

"Yeah," Fanboy said, stepping up to the desk. "I have an appointment with Dr. Alvarez." 

He offered them a hesitant smile, one that he hoped softened the edges of his obvious anxiety. Instead, the woman's mouth drew in tighter, dangerously close to a frown. The man next to her however schooled his features into professional sympathy. "I'm sorry, sir. Dr. Alvarez actually had to step out." 

Fanboy's shoulders sank under the weight of his disappointment. He'd known it'd been a risk using his name while making the appointment. A part of him had considered using a fake name, but ultimately decided that would cross the line into unhinged.  "Do you know if she'll be back today or this week?"

The man shook his head. "She didn't say." 

"Dr. Houten is still in and he should be finishing up with his last patient if you would like to see him instead," the woman offered, rising from her chair. "I'll just let him know." 

Fanboy took a deep breath, eyes floating to the open hallway behind them as he weighed his options. He could stay and waste his time getting adjusted by her colleague which meant he'd have to wait until next week in order to try catching her here again or he could just leave and camp out in the parking lot like a total lunatic—he didn't finish the thought. Instead, down the hall a door opened and out of it came Dr. Lane. 

The same woman who had spilled a drink on Caro that first night back at the Hard Deck. 

Who, when he asked during his physical, had scoffed at the very idea of knowing Caro beyond that incident.

Who now made eye-contact with him and clearly and solemnly said, "Shit." 

She spun on her heel, hands coming up as if to push someone behind her, but instead, the person brushed her aside, coming out and peering down the hall to see what had prompted the reaction.

Caro.

She was openly shocked, her eyes wide and locked on him. Dr. Lane cast a quick glance between Caro and Fanboy before fixing her own determined gaze on him, her jaw set as she started down the hallway towards him with long purposeful strides. She stopped next to the older woman who had freed herself from behind the receptionist's desk.

It took less than a second for him to discern what was happening, the piercing realization bringing with it an acute and sharp pain in his chest. They were barricading him from the hallway. They were protecting her from him. 

His face crumpled, brows furrowing and lips bowing into a frown. "I just came to talk," he said, his voice desperate and thin.

Dr. Lane shook her head. "You should head back to base." The words were technically a suggestion, but they sounded far more like an order. "She knows how to reach you if she wants to talk." 

Fanboy opened and closed his mouth again, eyes shooting over her shoulder to try to find Caro. She had come closer, reaching the trio now and laying a hand on the other doctor's shoulder. "Jas," she said calmly, gently pushing her to the side so that she could come out into the waiting room. "It's ok." 

The statement did little to pacify Dr. Lane. Instead, the other woman shot Caro a look that very clearly expressed her distrust of the situation. She didn't say anything though, allowing Caro to pass in between her and the Renew Chiropractic employee. 

"We can talk outside," Caro said, pointing to the door behind Fanboy. 

He nodded, leading the way out, pausing only to hold the door open for her before he headed down the path and out of sight of the glass front door. 

When he turned to face Caro, he found her with her hand stuffed in the pockets of her maroon scrubs, her face carefully and uncharacteristically impassive. 

"I'm sorry–" he started before Caro cut him off.

"You found where I work?" Her words came out even, dull almost, but he could sense the danger underneath them. 

"I tried to text and call, but–"

"But I didn't answer, so you decided to ambush me at my job," she finished for him, folding her arms across her chest.

"It wasn't an ambush!" he protested, his heart rate rocketing at the accusation. "I made an appointment. So you'd know I was coming." 

He watched her process this statement in real time. Her brow scrunching in the middle and corners of her mouth tugging down slightly. Her eyes slid to the right, towards the building, before snapping back to him. It was then that she seemed to see him for the first time—noticing that he was in his service khakis and the tension in his shoulders and maybe even the plea in his face for her to just give him a chance. 

Caro took a deep breath, audibly pushing it out through her nose. "Ok," she said, her voice having lost some of its edge. "I can give you fifteen minutes." 

Fanboy also breathed out a sigh of relief, eyes falling to the ground between them before flickering up to her. "You know, the website said forty-five," he attempted with a smile which faded quickly as her eyes hardened once more. "Sorry, yeah, fifteen minutes." 

Silence entwined itself between the two of them as they stood in front of her office building, both in their respective uniforms and both wishing very much that this wasn't how they were spending their day.

Caro was the one who finally broke the silence. "You wanted to talk?" 

"Yeah," Fanboy breathed out, hand coming up to rub the back of his head. "Yeah, I did." His eyes met hers again, despite the fact that every time he seemed to look at her, she seemed to grow even more guarded, even further away. "The other night at the Hard Deck…and then now…" he took in a deep breath before releasing it and the remainder of his sentence with it. "It just seems like there's something wrong between us." 

"I was just surprised," Caro shrugged.

"Yeah," Fanboy agreed, hating his masochistic need to push the subject. "It just seemed like more than surprise. I know it's been years, but I thought…you just didn't seem…I don't know…"

"Happy to see you?" Caro supplied, raising an eyebrow. 

He flushed at the accurate indictment of his own ego, and she shook her head at him. 

"What were you expecting, Mickey?" she asked, exasperation tingeing every word. "Me to throw myself into your arms like nothing's changed?"

The thought had crossed his mind more than once, but even he knew that outcome was more of a daydream, a fantasy, than a possible outcome of his arrival back in Fightertown. 

"No," Fanboy shook his head. "I just thought we were good." 

"We're fine." 

"Then why did your receptionists just try to keep me from seeing you? And why has Dr. Lane stepped in to keep you from spending more than five minutes with me?" 

He didn't want to know the answer to either question. There couldn't be a good reason–one that would get him back on track and restore his focus on earning a spot in the mission. Whatever she said was going to spin him out worse than he was already. But he had to know. Because if he left it at Caro's lie he would never forgive himself. Just like he already couldn't forgive himself for just accepting that the original plan for their relationship's end was just fine. That nothing had changed from the moment they made that agreement to his last moments of saying goodbye.

"They're overprotective," Caro supplied. 

"But they don't even know me." 

"They know about you. That's enough."

He grew quiet, and the urge he had to walk towards her, to close the space between them, died. Instead, he pulled back some, as if she had poked a finger into his chest the way she used to when she was mad. 

"What do they know?" 

For the first time, Caro was unable to meet his gaze, her eyes going to a large ceramic flower pot that lined the path. "They know I loved you and that you left and blocked me so I haven't seen or heard from you in five years."

"What?" His horrified whisper seemed to suck out all of the air and sounds from their surroundings. 

Caro met his eyes, and he could see the emotion there for the first time, thick and threatening.  "You left," she repeated, "And you blocked me." 

"I didn't block you–" he started, voice still wavering and almost soundless. 

"You did," Caro said with a nod. She took a breath in, and like that, the emotions fell back down into her and away from the surface. "It's fine, though. It doesn't matter anymore."

"It matters," Fanboy insisted, finally taking a step towards her. 

"No it doesn't. I'm over it." 

"It matters to me," he tried again, taking another step, but Caro tightened her arms against her chest. 

"It shouldn't," she said flatly. "Because it wouldn't change anything. You'd still have gone to Virginia, I'd still have been here, and life still would've moved on for both of us."

"Would it have?" He sounded almost as desperate as he felt.

"It did," she said, quietly. Caro ran a hand through her hair, looking over his shoulder and out into the parking lot. "Things are different now."

There was something in her voice. A distance almost as if trying to avoid coming too close to what exactly life had changed. 

A thought popped into his head, and before he could stop himself, the question was escaping. "Are you seeing someone?"

Caro's expression turned stony, and she straightened her spine. "What? You'll only respect the fact that I'm not interested in starting whatever it is you're hoping for if another man is involved?"

"No," he sputtered. 

"Then why does it matter if I'm seeing anyone?"

The pressure in his chest felt worse than any G force he had ever experienced. 

"I just–" he started, struggling to form a response that wouldn't further drive her away. "I'm trying to understand."

Her eyes fluttered closed in obvious annoyance, but he supposed the gesture was better than having her turn away. When she looked at him once more, she was still clearly frustrated, but her gaze had softened some.

"I'm not seeing anyone," she admitted. "I'm just older now. I have more responsibilities, and I can't—" she cut herself off, swallowing and then breathing and then restarting again, slower this time. "I can't do this again," she finished, gesturing with a finger. "I need something stable now."

He was able to nod twice before the weight of his thoughts caused him to just hang his head to stare at his shoes. "Yeah that's...that's fair," he managed. Quiet once more settled itself around them, ballooning in the space between them so he felt even further from her. "Could we at least maybe get a drink while I'm here. As friends?"

"Mickey," she said, gently. Too gently. "You know we can't be just friends."

A car door slammed in the parking lot behind him, pulling Caro's attention from him. The color drained from her face, taking with it the awful look of sympathy. Instead she looked horrified, like she might throw up or pass out. Or both. 

"Caro?" Fanboy asked, closing the space between them in two long strides. "Are you —"

"Mama!" A delighted shriek cut him off as quick and heavy thwaps hurtled towards them. He turned, watching with wide eyes as a little girl with bronzed skin and dark pigtails barreled towards Caro, only stopping when she collided with the chiropractor's legs, narrowly missing him. 

He was going to be sick. 

"Look!" The little girl demanded, shoving her hand up into Caro--her mother--'s face. "Kelsey painted my nails!"

Each little finger nail was a different color. Some a neon green, others a deep glittery navy, a sleek red, and a metallic purple. No two colors or textures were the same. 

"I see," Caro said with a nod, taking the girl's tiny hand in hers and tilting it back and forth to inspect each nail.

For a second it looked as if she might glance up to meet Fanboy's eyes, but instead she looked into the little girl--her daughter--'s face. 

"You know Bryson would probably like to see your nails, " she commented, releasing the small hand. "Why don't you go show him, and I'll meet you in there when I'm done talking? Then we can go home." 

The little girl looked up at her before suddenly shifting her attention to Fanboy, her big brown eyes peering intently at him, assessing. 

Evidently he failed as she frowned and then turned back to Caro, appealingly. "Um, what if you came with me?" Caro gave her a small smile, reaching down to brush hair out of her daughter's face. 

"Give me five minutes ok? You can ask Kelsey to help you keep track," she said, looking up to where the babysitter—Kelsey—hovered. It was then Fanboy noticed that she was staring between him and Caro, brow furrowed. She seemed to snap out of it at the sound of her name though, reaching a hand out for the little girl. 

"Come on, Dalia. Let's go show Bryson." 

The name caused all breath to escape from Mickey's lungs, and this time Caro's eyes did shoot to his, their gazes locking on each other. 

Neither of them took their eyes off of the other as the little girl reached for her babysitter's hand, letting the teenager guide her inside and away from Fanboy and Caro and the tension between them outside. 

"Dalia?" He asked, the repetition of the name more than just a question of whether or not he had heard it correctly. 

He was met with silence, which maybe should have been answer enough. Still, he felt like he needed to hear it, needed some sort of response, and so he attempted to ask again. 

"Is she…?" he trailed off, looking to the door the little girl had passed through just moments before. 

The little girl.

His–

He couldn't finish the thought. 

Because she couldn't be. They had been safe—mostly— and who was to say that she hadn't been with anyone after he left? And it was entirely possible that when he'd shared that name with her five years ago, both of them wrapped up in her sheets with his arms around her and her head resting against his shoulder, she had decided that she'd liked it too and wanted to use it herself for any future children.

But when he met her eyes again, he could see it all over her face. 

"Oh my God," he murmured. 

"Mickey, I—" 

"Why didn't you tell me?" he asked, heart pounding as the world seemed to spin around him, alarms whirring to life to signal that he was crashing. 

"I tried."

The words came out so small and quiet, it broke something in him. 

"What?" his voice cracked on the word. 

"Right after I found out. I tried calling you and texting, but nothing went through. I even tried reaching out on Facebook, and I was blocked." She spread her hands wide, shrugging.

It hit him then: he had blocked her. Right after he had returned to his squadron and gotten word of their upcoming short deployment. It had been too hard seeing pictures of her pop up on his feed. He wasted hours talking himself out of reaching back out and begging her to at least try long distance with him. He'd blocked her to protect her from any potential weak moments on the carrier. 

"Shit," he breathed out, stepping backwards. His hand going up to his forehead. He missed his curls, something to hold onto to ground him in reality.

"I–" he started before taking another breath and trying again. "Do I need to sign papers or something?" 

"Papers?"' Caro repeated. "For what?" she asked.

He lifted the hand from his head, gesturing to where his—Dalia had disappeared.  "For her."

Understanding dawned on her face as she offered a smile that made him want to scream just to dislodge the emotion caught in his throat, threatening to choke him. She shook her head. "You don't need to do anything."

"I should help. I want to help," he pressed, correcting himself. 

"Mickey," Caro said clearly, sternly. The same way he imagined she spoke to Dalia. "You're fine. Nothing changes just because you know now."

He breathed out a disbelieving, humorless laugh. "Everything changes."

"You're still in the Navy."

He sucked in a breath. Fuck. 

Fuck.

She didn't need to continue. Bringing up the Navy was enough, but she went on anyway, whether because she thought he'd need more explanation or because she wanted him to feel the weight of her world. 

"You're still stationed on the other side of the country. You're still gone in a month. You still have deployments and missions and wars and I don't want that for her." Caro stopped, and he could see the emotion back on the surface. It was everywhere from her eyes to her now slightly slumped shoulders to the desperate edge her voice had taken on. "I'm just trying to do what's best for my daughter here. You see that right?" 

Fanboy's shoulders dropped. "I know," he said. "It's just…I have a daughter, Caro. I want to at least meet her. Even if it's not as her dad." 

Caro was quiet, and he could see the thought turning over in her head. The tinkling bell of the front door opening interrupted her, prompting the pair to turn in tandem to see who was coming back out. Fanboy's breath caught hoping for Dalia to come bounding around the corner. Instead, it was Dr. Lane.

"Caro?" she asked. "I've been sent to inform you that it's been six minutes."

Caro nodded, offering a quick reassuring smile. "I'll be right in." 

Dr. Lane nodded, her eyes falling on Fanboy with a hard, assessing look. She remained standing, just off to the side, resolute. 

This prompted a softer, more genuine smile from Caro. "Can you let her know Jas?" she asked. The other doctor seemed more than a little reluctant to head back inside, disappearing with another sound of the bell.

Caro waited a second more, as if not entirely sure Jas was gone. Finally she faced him again, more relaxed than he'd seen her since he returned to San Diego. "I'll think about it," Caro assured. "Just promise me you won't try to come back here again or try to see her on your own. Please." 

Fanboy nodded, taking a deep breath. "Yeah, I promise."

"I'll text you. Either way, I'll text you, and we'll talk. Deal?" 

A sad half smile crossed his face remembering all of the other deals they'd made. This felt like the worst one by far. 

"Deal," he agreed.  

Caro re-entered the office to find Dalia standing on one of the chairs, peering over the reception  desk. 

"Dalia," she sighed, hand going to her head as her daughter's head whipped around. "No standing on the chairs, remember?" 

"Sorry," Dalia and Jas both apologized and Caro's eyes slid over to the auburn haired woman as her daughter jumped down off the seat.

"I thought you'd have headed back." 

Jas shrugged. "Thought I'd stick around just in case." 

"That's kind of you, but I'm fine," Caro said, heading forward to her daughter, wrapping her arms around the four year old's torso in a swaying hug. 

Jas snorted. "That has got to be the least convincing I'm fine ever." 

"I'm sorry, I didn't know," Kelsey apologized from where she had taken her mother's seat next to Bryson.

Caro shook her head. "You have nothing to apologize for. Thank you for dropping her off." She looked down at the four year old. "And giving her a fun day." 

Kelsey smiled as her parents came down the hall together, Dr. Houten giving his wife the same look he gave patients who came in after complicated car accidents. His eyes found Caro's, and her stomach dropped. 

"Are you ok?" 

"I'm fine. Really," Caro dismissed. "It was just awkward." 

"What was awkward, Mama?" Dalia asked, leaning her head back to peer up at her mother. Caro offered a smile.

"I got a surprise visit from someone I haven't seen in a really long time. And sometimes when you haven't seen someone in a long time, things are awkward."

"Oh." Dalia said, hanging herself forwards on Caro's arms. "Can we go home now?"

Caro nodded. "Let me grab my things from my office, ok?" 

She headed towards the back and Dr. Houten followed her. "Robin filled me in a little on what's going on. If you need to take a few days to sort this out, I can take your patients and we can reschedule the rest–"

"It's fine. Really," Caro said, bending over her desk to pick up her purse. "He won't be back."

He raised an eyebrow.

"He doesn't want to see Dalia?"

Caro looked up at him. "He won't be back here. I just–I need this to keep me busy."

He looked unsure, pressing his lips together before nodding. "Ok. But if it becomes obvious that you need time off, I'm not giving you an option."

"Thanks, Mark," Caro said, shouldering her purse. "Really."

He smiled, looking for a second like he might be tempted to give her a side hug before realizing that'd be even more awkward than a regular one. Instead, he laid a light hand on her back as if ushering her out of her own office. 

Dalia was straddling two chairs when Caro exited the office, her hands wrapped in Jas' for stability. The guilty look on Jas' face killed the reprimand on Caro's tongue, replaced instead with a laugh and shake of her head. 

"Ready?" She asked her daughter. 

Dalia jumped out of the chair, tugging her hands free from Jas'. "Can we get ice cream?"

Caro loved her daughter. 

She was so good. So easy all things considered. She wanted her mother and ice cream and fun, and she didn't need any complications to her life. 

"Hmm," she hummed, squinting in mock-thought. She could practically feel the excitement bubbling off of the four year old. "I don't know…."

"Pleeeeeeease," Dalia begged, skipping forward to wrap her arms around Caro, head tilted up to implore her mother with big eyes.

"Ok," Caro agreed, tapping her daughter's nose. Dalia let out a cheer, releasing Caro and bouncing off towards the door. 

It was entirely possible that more sugar was the last thing Dalia needed, but the girl apparently knew a thing or two about timing her questions. 

"You know," Jas said, sidling up next to Caro. "I like ice cream."

Caro raised an eyebrow as she pressed out the door, waving a hand to the staff remaining behind. "Is that supposed to be a subtle hint that you'd like to join us?"

"To be fair, subtlety is not my strong suit," Jas admitted, walking alongside Caro. "If you'd rather keep it just a mother daughter thing, though, I totally get it."

Caro smiled at her new friend before her eyes darted to her daughter about to hop into the parking lot. "Hand please, Dalia," she called out. The little girl turned and scampered back, taking hold of Cato's outstretched hand. "What do you think?" Caro asked her daughter. "Can Jas join us for ice cream?"

"Yep," Dalia chirped as she skipped next to her mom. Caro looked back at Jas with a smile. 

"You're in."

Next Chapter (Coming Soon)

[0nlythrowharrybeaux]

Wonderful World - Part 10^

Hello friends! Here's the next part where you guys get introduced to Diana's family! Also, Harry is starting to realize things....

Warnings: mentions of bullying due to homophobia, mentiones of injuries and blood, racism (mild, there's not any slurs or anything like that), verbal abuse (parent to child), family fighting

WC: 13.6K

Celeste was nervous. She knew she needed to talk to Geri about what happened and so she caught her right before they had jazz combo practice.

“Geri, can I talk to you for a minute?” She asked and Geri looked surprised that Celeste wasn’t ignoring her like she had all week long.

“Yeah.” She said and put her trumpet case down on her seat before following her out into the breezy corridor of in front of the band room. Celeste was twisting her fingers nervously as she formulated the words to express how she was feeling and finally she just decided to say them how they kept wanting to come out.

“I’m mad at you.” She said with a slight frown and Geri nodded.

“I figured. I just don’t know why.” She said softly and Celeste sighed.

“Because you lied to me!” She said with exasperation, “Megan wrote me this letter where she talks about why she was bullying me and…she thought we liked each other and she was taking out the fact that you rejected her on me!” She explained with frustration and Geri’s face fell.

“Oh.”

“That never even crossed your mind?!” Celeste asked and Geri shook her head.

“No…she was so regretful and upset for even trying to kiss me. It was like the 3rd week of school! I thought maybe she had tried the same thing with you and you just…didn’t want to talk about it.” She shrugged and Celeste frowned.

“Well if you did want to talk about it you could’ve told me! We could’ve dealt with all of this much sooner before it got really bad and that’s why I’m mad at you! I feel like you’ve been protecting your own ass and letting me take the fall for all this dumb stuff when I’ve had nothing to do with it from the start!” She vented and Geri was pouting now.

“I’m so sorry, Celeste. I swear I didn’t mean to do that and…I was just scared to tell someone what happened, she said she’d hurt me if I did.” Geri explained, “I would never let anyone hurt you on my account, I swear. I just didn’t put that together. And I…should’ve said something to you about what happened with Megan, I just…I was embarrassed for being scared of her. I’m sorry I let you down and I will do anything I can to help make up for it!” She pleaded nervously and Celeste sighed.

“Fine. I forgive you.” She mumbled and Geri cheered happily as she hugged her tight. Celeste was stubborn and was fighting off her urge to smile that at least this was fixed, but she soon gave in as Geri poked at her dimples a few times until she caved. Her uncle was going to pick her up from school today, so she was very pleased about that and well, now she had made up with Geri, so things were hopefully just about to get a lot better. 

When practice was over she rushed to pack and hurried out to the parking lot and just ran through it when she saw her uncle standing outside with her mom, he was jumping up and down and waving her down like crazy.

“Hi uncle Damian!” She cheered as she ran into his arms and he groaned as he caught her and stumbled a bit.

“God, you’re getting too tall.” He said as he spun her around quickly before setting her down, “Look at you, gorgeous! Unlike your mom, she’s the ugly sibling.” He mumbled and Diana scoffed as she playfully punched his arm as he and Celeste laughed at her expense. As soon as they settled in they drove off to get some dinner at this pizza place that Celeste really liked. She liked when her uncle came over because it just made her and her mom really happy. She liked that it felt like no time had passed when they were together. The jokes, harmless teasing, and conversations were all effortless. She wanted Dr. Styles to meet her uncle, she’s sure they would get along well. They both liked music and they were both kinda funny.

“So what’ve you got planned for tomorrow?” Damian asked Diana as they all headed back home.

“Ummm…Disneyland?” She said with a smile and Celeste squealed excitedly.

“Yes! I’ve been begging to go for months!” She said dramatically and they both chuckled at her reaction.

“I got a package deal through the university and bought 6 tickets for the price of 4! So Grace is coming too with Henry and well, I was going to invite Geri and Ozzy, not sure if you’re still upset with Geri.” She said and Celeste shook her head as she made eye contact with Diana through the rearview mirror.

“No, we made up today. Let me ask them if they’re free! What time are we leaving?” 

“We can leave the house around 10?”

“Perfect.” Celeste said and immediately texted Geri and Ozzy.

“Who is Henry?” Damian asked and Diana turned to him briefly.

“Oh! Grace’s boyfriend!”

“Grace got a boyfriend?!” He asked with a smile and she nodded with pride.

“She did…” she smiled.

“Bummer.” He mumbled quietly with a grin and Diana rolled her eyes. She knew that Damian and Grace had hooked up before, they had told her straight away after the first time it happened. It had been a drunken thing, but they were both not looking for anything serious and so he looked forward to that when he visited her and Celeste. They got along really, really well and never made it weird so Diana didn’t care, “I’m happy for her though, she deserves someone good.” He said and Diana nodded.

“Yeah, he’s really great. He’s actually Celeste’s therapist’s best friend.” She shared and Celeste gasped.

“Really?!” She asked in surprise and Diana nodded and hummed in confirmation.

“It’s a small world.” She said and Celeste nodded.

“What if we invited Dr. Styles too so he can be with all his friends and meet uncle Damian?” She said and Diana chuckled.

“Remember what we said about therapists and being friends with their patients? I think this might be a little too blurred of a situation.” She explained and Celeste huffed. She really wanted Harry around as much as possible, which in a way was great news for Diana, but she wanted him around for her own personal reasons, not because she would be OK with him being around for the both of them.

“Well that sucks…”

“I mean, he can decide what’s too much for him, but I just think he wouldn’t really go for that. Sorry, mamita.” She explained.

“Yeah, I guess that’s true.” Celeste huffed and then proceeded to text with Geri and Ozzy who had confirmed they would go. As soon as they got home Celeste hurried up to her room to get showered and plan a Disneybounding outfit with Geri and Ozzy over FaceTime.

Diana helped Damian get his things up to the guest bedroom and soon they were sitting in the backyard with wine glasses in hand as they looked up at the sparse stars in the sky.

“Has mom called you?” Diana asked and Damian hummed in confirmation.

“She’ll be here on Sunday night.” He said and Diana nodded in understanding, “And don’t worry, I got her a hotel.” He said and she smiled.

“Thanks.” She said and he nodded.

“So this therapist Celeste keeps talking to me about?”

“He’s great, it’s been going really well. He’s helped her out a lot to get through everything she’s been dealing with. I wasn’t too sure about the dynamic between her and a male therapist but I think she’s just been needing more of that masculine vibe in her life, you know? She looks up to him a lot and really listens to him, it’s been going really well.” She said he smiled and nodded.

“Good. Will I get to meet him?”

“Yeah, if you want. She has a session on Monday and well, he’ll also be at the board meeting on Wednesday, she asked him to come for moral support.” She explained and Damian nodded.

“Good. Just need to make sure he’s not a creep, you know?” He said lowly and Diana scoffed.

“Don’t even say that, that’s awful.” She said shaking her head and he shrugged.

“You never know, sis! I just want to look out for Celeste.” He said and she nodded in understanding. “And what about you? Any masculine energy in your life?” He asked and she scoffed.

“Nice transition.”

“I try.” He shrugged smugly, “Well?” He asked and she sighed.

“Not really…” she fibbed as she went for another sip of her wine.

“Liar.”

“I’m not lying. I’m not really seeing anyone right now.”

“Not really?” He asked and she shook her head.

“Like not at all.” She then said more firmly and he smirked.

“Keep your secrets…” he sighed.

“Well what about you? What happened to Angelica after that fight?”

“She…she was too much, you know?”

“It’s OK to marry someone if you really like them, you know?”

“And end up like mom and dad? No thanks.” He said and she sighed. Maybe Damian just didn’t know what real, passionate love felt like. Like she had with Wesley; her parents were even cold towards each other, it was just how they grew up and so they repeated that pattern with them as well.

“You loved her though.”

“She almost ruined my life.”

“Because she wanted to settle down?”

“Because she wanted to slow me down.” He said and she shook her head.

“Bro, you can’t be on your own forever.”

“You’re one to talk.” He smirked and she sighed.

“That’s…different.” She said quietly and he frowned a bit when he realized he had breeched a sensitive topic.

“I know, sorry. Are you alright?”

“Yeah…it’s just been hard. Like Wes would be so much help during this whole thing. It’s been hard doing it all alone.”

“I can imagine. Have you been missing him a lot?”

“Sometimes. It’s not like before, where I’m still heartbroken about it, but I can’t help but feel sad that he’s missed all of this, you know?” She said and he nodded.

“Celeste looks just like him, that smile of hers.” He said and Diana nodded with a smile.

“Yeah, I told her the same thing. Showed her the year book from senior year, started talking about it a little more with her. I know she has questions, so I’ve been trying to answer them.”

“That’s good, sis.” He said and she nodded. Damian as just about to ask about Grace and her boyfriend when Diana’s phone lit up with her name.

“Hey Gracie!” She said happily, “We’re planning on leaving from my house at 10-ish?” She said, “Wait, let me put you on speaker, m’here with Damian.” She said and then put the line on speaker.

“Damian, hi!” She cheered happily through the line.

“Hi! I hear you’re taken now.” He said immediately and she giggled.

“I am. I know that sucks for you, but it’s going really well.”

“Good, I’m so happy for you.” He assured.

“Thank you.” She said and they could practically hear the smile on her face as she spoke, “Well Di, I was calling because I may have accidentally invited Harry to Disneyland.” She said and Diana’s eyes went wide.

“Wait, I thought he was already supposed to be coming with us?”

“No! Henry is her boyfriend, Harry is the Therapist, Celeste’s therapist. Her man’s best friend.” Diana clarified.

“That’s…confusing.” Damian said and Diana rolled her eyes.

“He hasn’t said yes or anything, but he was saying that he’s never been when we mentioned our weekend plans and so Henry said that he could go off with him on his own, you know if it’s too weird for him to be with all of us?” She said with a hint of something in her voice that Damian could not decipher.

“I mean…yeah, they could…go off together.”

“Would it really be that awful if he joined the group?” Grace asked, again with that tone and Diana looked a little bit too concerned about this. There was something else going on here.

“Grace, I hate you sometimes.”

“C’mon, the guy has never been and did seem excited when I invited him. I’ll feel so bad disinviting him!”

“Well that your own fault! We need to respect the professional boundaries.”

“Oh, OK…” Grace said sarcastically and Diana sighed.

“What’s the big deal? Celeste wanted to invite him and you said that it was up to him to decide his boundaries or something like that.” Damian chimed in.

“Exactly! Harry can decide for himself what’s pushing the envelope too far! This could be really great! For all of us.” She added in suggestively and Diana shook her head. Of course she wanted Harry to go, but this would be really hard for her and the purpose of this day was to destress and make memories with her brother and Celeste, not to be paranoid over Celeste possibly seeing her subconsciously flirting with Harry and him flirting back, “If you don’t say yes I’ll start naming reasons for why you should.” She said and Diana could not risk that, so she groaned.

“Fine. Fine!” She said and Grace and Damian cheered.

“Amazing! We’ll see you tomorrow at 10!” Grace exclaimed, “Good night! Love you both, and yes, Damian, I already told Henry about our drunken flings.” She said and he scoffed.

“They weren’t all drunken!”

“They were for me! See you guys tomorrow!” She laughed before hanging up and Damian rolled his eyes.

“She always assured me she wasn’t drunk apart from that first time.” He informed Diana and she giggled.

“Grace says a lot of things…”

“Yeah, I’m learning that.” He chuckled sarcastically and she grinned, “You seem too apprehensive about this therapist guy. It’s making me concerned.”

“It’s nothing bad!” She said quickly, “it’s just that…he’s hot, OK?” She confessed and Damain smirked.

“Oh, so you have the hots for him.”

“No. He just…makes me blush sometimes and I don’t want Celeste to get the wrong idea just because I get nervous around cute guys. She doesn’t even like the idea of me being friends with him so I’ve just been trying to keep a very cool distance as to not make anything look remotely personal.”

“I mean yeah, it would be weird if you were flirting with her therapist.”

“Yeah, right!?” She asked for confirmation and he nodded.

“Well, at least it’d be weird for me if I was in her shoes.” He said and she nodded.

“It’d be weird for me too.” She agreed, “Does ummmm, does mom know about everything that’s been going on here?”

“Yeah, told her a few months back, after the girl hurt her in school. She acted like she didn’t really care, but-”

“She didn’t act, she just doesn’t care.” Diana said and Damian sighed, “I just hate how she just makes me feel like my life is a mistake, you know? Like I get that things are remotely different than I ever planned for them to be, but that doesn’t mean my life is bad or that I made bad choices, you know?”

“I know, Di. But you know how she is and-”

“It’s not an excuse! Why does she even bother coming if all she’s gonna do is make things harder for me or make me feel inadequate about everything I do?”

“In her own way she loves you.”

“Yeah, because anything good I do makes her feel good about herself…”

“Just…pretend to agree with her.”

“Hell no!” She said and he chuckled, “She literally begged me to get an abortion and she hated Wesley, she never confirmed it, but I’m sure it’s because he was black.” She said and Damian sighed.

“Yeah…that’s…probably true. She’s kind of a bitch.” He said and she giggled.

“Yeah…she is.” Diana said quietly.

Most of the damage in her life had come from her relationship with her mother. She had always been so cold and strict with her about everything. She was heavily criticized and manipulated into a lot of harmful things. Her mom thought that tough love meant being an asshole and so she was quite cruel. 

Diana remembers that towards the end of 8th grade she’d put on some weight. She was going through puberty, so she hungrier and growing, but she had always been on the thinner side up until then. She was busier at school so she wasn’t exercising except for half-ass-ing PE and when the time came for homecoming her freshman year she couldn’t really fit the dress she had bought during he post-prom sales in the late spring. She remembers that her mom called her fat and told her that she needed to stop eating so much. She was only given a protein shake for breakfast, and salads for lunch and dinner and her mom even got her a personal trainer to help her lean out again by Christmas. She stayed on this insane regimen for about a year, she started getting ill due to lack of carbohydrates in her diet; she had low energy and low blood sugar. When her doctor confronted her about taking laxatives and appetite suppressants she was shocked, but it turns out her mom had been sneaking them into her morning shakes. Even though her mom stopped forcing her to do this to herself it had become a habit, that’s why it as easy for her to forget meals when she was too busy, she had done that a lot throughout her life. A lot of her self-loathing practices and traits had origin stories like this one. It just felt like no matter what she did, her mom was never proud of her and that hurt. So naturally, she wanted nothing to do with her if she had the choice.

“It’ll be alright, I won’t let her be a dick to you, OK?” Damian said and she nodded.

“Thanks. Look, I should shower and go to bed.”

“Me too, that flight was long, there was a family behind me.” He said and Diana groaned, “I know…” he chuckled. Soon they were saying goodnight and heading into their respective rooms. 

Diana locked her bedroom door because she needed to talk to Harry. Right as she stepped into her bathroom to get her make up off he called her and she answered him and put him on speaker as she grabbed her makeup removing balm.

“Hey.” He said nervously, she could hear his tone through the line.

“Hey.”

“I hope you’re not mad, but Grace didn’t tell me this was a thing with your family and-”

“It’s alright, Harry. Celeste was talking about how fun it’d be if you could come along too before we even knew about Grace inviting you, so I think it’s fine if you want to join us.” She said as she dipped her fingers into the jar and started to melt the balm in her hands.

“Yeah, Celeste is always enthusiastic about seeing me, but what about you?” He asked, “I won’t go if this is gonna be too strange for us.”

“I don’t want to be the person to deny your visit to the happiest place on earth! Don’t put this on me, Harry.” She said and he chuckled.

“I mean…obviously I want to go. I want to spend time with you and with our friends, and with Celeste and meet her friends that she’s always mentioning…I mean your brother too.” He said and she bit her lip, that did sound so nice, “I mean, it’s going to be shitty to some extent for obvious reasons, but umm…I don’t know. I guess I just don’t know.” He said and she bit her lip as she rubbed the balm into her face to dissolve her makeup, “What’re you doing?” He asked, changing the subject instead.

“Just getting my makeup off before I hop in the shower.” She explained. “What about you?”

“I am on Grace’s balcony pretending to talk to my mum.” He said and she giggled.

“Nice…wouldn’t it be like 3am her time?” She asked and he chuckled.

“Maybe she’s on business in Australia…” he said and she chortled which made him grin and that soon faded as a thought came to mind, “Maybe if…if Celeste sees the whole group’s dynamic with me in it she’ll…maybe be more open to us having more of a friendly relationship?” He posed his idea and she nodded.

“Maybe…it’s also probably a good time to tell you that I told Grace about us kissing.” She said quickly and he chuckled.

“So that’s why she was insistent on me going…” he said and Diana shook her head.

“Probably…sorry, I just…felt bad for lying to her and I just really wanted to tell someone that I was like…sneakily kissing this super hot and smart guy so…yeah.” She said with a small smile and he chuckled bashfully.

“Super hot, huh?”

“Don’t let it get to your head, Harry.” She grinned and he tutted.

“Too late, specially with that coming from you.” He said and she blushed as she worked on getting the mascara on her lashes dissolved.

“I would like to see you tomorrow. Grace was saying something about you and Henry splitting off, but ummm, I would just be wondering where you are all day and if you’re having fun so you should join us if you want.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.” She agreed with a small smile.

“Perfect, I’ll see you tomorrow then.”

“Yeah.” She smiled.

“Maybe if we time it right we can hold hands on a ride or something.” He said and she giggled.

“Yeah, all of 60 seconds?” She giggled.

“Yeah, that’s worth it for me…” He flirted and she went all red in the face.

“Stop…oh my god.” She muttered bashfully and Harry grinned.

“God, I’d do anything to see you all blush-y and smiley right now.” He said and she bit her lip to suppress her smile.

“Well too bad.” She said with a chuckle and he hummed.

“Yeah, too bad.” He sighed. He knew that her walls were still up, but at least she felt something for him and that was enough to make him happy, “Are you sure it’s alright that I join you guys tomorrow?” He asked again, just to make sure.

“Yeah, like I said, I’d like to see you.” She clarified and he smiled.

“OK, love.” He hummed, “I’ll see you tomorrow then.”

“See ya, good night.”

“Good night.” He said before she hung up. Diana’s heart was pounding so hard she swore she was about to drop dead. She had so many feelings for him that were trapped inside and knowing that he’d be around just made her feel really giddy about everything. 

**********

It was nearly 9am when Diana heard her doorbell ring, she didn’t mind as she had been up since before then, but she was in the middle of getting dressed. So she hurried to put on her pants and hurried down to the door.

“Hey!” Grace greeted happily and Henry and Harry were behind her offering her friendly smiles.

“Hey guys, come on in!” She said with cheer, “I was just about to make some breakfast, have you eaten?” She asked them.

���No, we were hoping you’d feed us.” Grace said honestly and she laughed.

“Of course, just pile into the kitchen.” Diana assured and Harry may have walked a bit slower behind Henry and Grace just so he could give Diana a nice, uninterrupted hug. But when she turned around after locking the door she just smiled at him.

“C’mon.” She insisted before breezing past him, he didn’t even get to catch her. 

Diana got to preparing breakfast while Grace made some coffee and she hadn’t even said hello to him, let alone acknowledged him now that they were in a group. Quite honestly her ease in shrugging him off kind of hurt his feelings. She said that she wanted him there, but she was acting like he wasn’t even around. Henry noticed his silence and nudged his knee with his own.

“Hmmm?”

“What’re you upset about?” He mumbled quietly, the chatter between Grace and Diana was overpowering their own hushed conversation.

“I’m not.” He said and Henry looked at him skeptically, “What?” He asked with a slightly irritated chuckle.

“You’re acting weird. Maybe this wasn’t such a good idea.” Henry said and Harry sighed.

“She’s completely ignoring me-”

“We’re in her house, you’re not even supposed to be here! Of course she’s ignoring you! What if Celeste comes down and sees something she’s not supposed to?” He asked and Harry bit the inside of his cheek for a moment to calm himself and let reason seep in.

“Right. Right…I’m sorry.”

“You don’t have to apologize, just…don’t make it weird.” Henry said and Harry nodded.

“Yeah, alright.” He sighed and just shrugged off the irritation he was feeling. 

“Here you are, babe.” Grace said as she set a mug of coffee down before Henry, “How do you take your coffee, Harry?” Grace asked, but before he could respond Diana was sliding him a mug of just black coffee with a soft smile and as their eyes met his entire bad mood completely melted away.

“Black, right?” Diana asked and he nodded at her, “We’ve seen each other at Cafe Flores a couple times.” She explained to Henry and Grace who nodded.

“Oh OK, I was thinking you two had graduated to sleep overs in the span of a week!” Grace joked quietly and she thought it fell flat until the other three started chuckling along a few seconds later.

“No more side comments for you, babe.” Henry said and she grinned mischievously, which did make Diana a bit concerned, but that soon faded when Damian came into the kitchen.

“Oh, full house!” He said with a bright smile and his eyes immediately landed on Harry since Diana was right beside him, “The therapist I presume.” He pointed with a smile and Diana wanted to be buried alive as her brother singled Harry out.

“Well, actually he’s a psychiatrist.” Diana said as she twirled back to the pan she had left unattended for a few seconds. Harry felt a bit nervous that she had suddenly left him alone, but his exterior wasn’t showing any of his panic. He was smiling as he extended his hand out to Damian.

“And you’re the brother/uncle, Damian right?” Harry said and Damian nodded as he shook his hand, “Nice to meet you, I’ve heard tons about you from Celeste.” Harry said and Damian smiled.

“All fun things I hope.” He said and Harry chuckled.

“Yeah, just about.” He assured.

“Well, thanks man for you working with her. I hear she’s doing a lot better.” Damian said more seriously and Harry nodded.

“Yeah, of course. It’s been my pleasure, she’s a great kid.” 

“See sis, you’ve done good.” Damian said with a grin and Diana smiled briefly and then returned to cooking. Then he turned to Grace and Henry with a grin, “And you!” He smirked as he turned to Grace and she smiled, “A boyfriend!? Never thought I’d live to see the day!”

“I know, I know…” she said as they hugged briefly.

“You guys are lovely couple, by the way.” He said to Grace and then Henry who smiled. He had admittedly been feeling a bit nervous about meeting Damian based on the slight internet stalking he did of him after Grace told him about their past. He was grateful that as soon as she found out Damian was coming, she talked to him about their hookups because she didn’t want him to feel like she was hiding something from him. And well, if he had an issue with it, well Damian was Diana’s brother and he’d be around, so she just wanted to clear the air beforehand. 

“Thank you, this is Henry. Henry, this is Damian.”

“Nice to meet you, man.” Henry said as they shook hands.

“You too!” He assured with a friendly smile and didn’t say anything more about Grace, which he was grateful for. Damian was polite and considerate, this situation was sufficiently awkward and tense on it’s own, the last thing they needed was another layer of awkwardness thrown over it all. The guys started chatting about some big football game that was gonna be happening the next week so she and Grace just kind of tuned them out.

“Does anyone not want cheese in their breakfast sandwich?” She asked loudly and when they all said it was fine she started to layer the sliced cheese over the egg patties she had made to get it all nice and melty. It was around 9:15 when Celeste wandered down, still in her pajamas because the commotion had woken her up.

“You’re all so loud!” She raised her voice as she came in with narrowed eyes as she was still adjusting to the brightness of the day.

“S’time to get up anyway, kid.” Damian said and when she glanced over to him she immediately focused on Harry who was beside him and she smiled bright and hurried over.

“Dr. Styles?!” She greeted him happily with surprise and went in for a hug and he chuckled as he opened his arms to let her in, “Whoa!” She said as she peered down to his exposed left arm to see him literally covered in tattoos. She’d seen the one on his hand and wrist, but she had no idea there were so many more of them, “You have so many!” She said with amazement, “Mom, I want a tattoo!” She announced and everyone laughed.

“Yeah, when you’re 18.” Diana scoffed.

“Seriously?” Celeste asked turning to her after letting Harry go and Diana shrugged.

“Yeah, why not? I like ‘em.” She said with a playful little smile quirking her lip up to the side. She hadn’t even been looking at Harry when she said that, but he knew it was a stealth compliment towards him by the grin on her lips.

“What’s your favorite one?” Celeste turned back to him.

“Oh god… I’ve no clue…I’ve just got so many of them!” Harry said as he looked over his arm, “I’ve got more…here.” He said motioning to his torso with his hand, “Probably one of the big ones there, like my butterfly, I really like that one.” He said to Celeste who nodded in wonder and amazement.

“Did it hurt?” She asked.

“Did it ever, petal!” He said to her with a slight chuckle and she smiled. 

He had called her that before, ‘petal’. She liked that he had a nickname for her, it made her feel like he cared more about her than just a regular patient. Celeste trusted him a lot, she felt safe around him, and she felt comfortable with him. She liked that he kept it real with her, but also understood her, even the bad stuff. It made her happy to see him there with her uncle, Grace, and her mom. She hadn’t gotten to know Henry all that well yet, though she had met him and Grace had talked about him to her before, but having them all here together, it felt like they were also part of her family. And that made her extremely happy. 

“How bad?”

“Like 10 out of 10 pain.” He said with a slight frown and she looked a bit nervous now.

“Did you cry?”

“Almost.” He said and she shook her head.

“Maybe I change my mind…” she said and everyone chuckled, “Do they all hurt that bad?”

“No, it just depends where you get it.” He assured and she liked to hear that.

“Oh OK, thank god.” She said and they all laughed again.

“Sweetheart, the food’s almost ready so hurry up and get changed, yeah?”

“Yes! I’ll be back.” She said and rushed off again. 

“So Dr. Styles, any secret boyfriends she’s hiding from me that need vetting?” Damian asked and Harry chuckled.

“If I told you it wouldn’t be a secret would it?” He responded and Damian sighed.

“Touché…well, it was worth a shot.” he said with a chuckle and Harry shrugged as well before shaking his head “no” in response to Damian’s initial question and that made him smile. 

He decided that Harry was cool, he liked him, and yeah, Diana was on to something in thinking he was attractive. But it wasn’t just a physical thing, it was just his energy. It was intense, but not intimidating or overpowering. He certainly wasn’t interacting with Celeste in a creepy way and well, Diana trusted him with Celeste, which spoke volumes. And well, more importantly, Celeste trusted him too. He wondered if she had maybe started to view him as a paternal figure as well, from what Diana had told him Celeste had invited him to the meeting and her spring concert and well, she also wanted him to come to Disneyland with them, so that could only tell him that she wanted him around more.

“Alright everyone go…use the facilities or whatever before we leave!” Diana announced after everyone had eaten. Celeste was the first one to rush upstairs to brush her teeth and gather up her things.

“Babe, do you still have spare toothbrushes-”

“Yep, in the little thing under the sink.” She confirmed to Grace with a smile.

“C’mon boys, you don’t want to have egg breath!” She announced and Henry and Harry quickly trailed after her to the downstairs bathroom as Diana giggled.

“I like him.” Damian said once they were gone and Diana hummed.

“Yeah, he’s pretty great.” She said and he grinned.

“I can see why you have a crush on him.”

“I don’t have a- I just said he’s hot.” She corrected her brother and he grinned.

“Why are you blushing?”

“Just go upstairs and shower! And brush your teeth, you don’t want egg breath either!” She said shoving him lightly and he grinned smugly before heading up stairs as well. She hadn’t eaten because she was nervous about Harry being here, but she probably should try to because it was going well. She started to make herself a sandwich with the leftover stuff. She heard Celeste bounding down the stairs quickly and was about to shout at her to slow down, she could fall and hurt herself!

“Hey, slow down wouldn’t want you falling and cracking your head open!” Diana heard Harry say to Celeste and she smiled.

“Sorry, Geri and Ozzy are here!” She explained.

“Yeah, to come to Disneyland with us, not the ER.” He said pointedly and she laughed and Diana also sniggered as she finished assembling her sandwich. She set it aside and then started to rinse off the things she had used to get them in the dishwasher.

“Hey.” She heard Harry’s voice and glanced to him at the entrance of the kitchen.

“Hey.” She smiled at him as leaned over to open up the dishwasher.

“You’re not gonna eat?” He asked as he came over to the island.

“I will, mine is just there.” She cocked her head to the stove where he saw a plate with her sandwich.

“Here, let me do this and you eat.” He said and she shook her head.

“S’alright it’ll only take a few minutes.” She assured him and he smiled at her obstinance.

“Just let me help you, yeah?” He asked again and she exhaled and nodded.

“Yeah, thank you.” She said and he smiled as she stepped aside and he started rinsing things while she sat at the island, in the same seat he had been in previously he noticed, and she started eating. Grace peeked her head in and said she and Henry were gonna go buy some sports drinks really quick.

“Can you take the kids and pick out some snacks for them? I’ll pay you back.” She said to Grace and she nodded.

“Course, c’mon, babe.” She said to Henry and they left quickly.

“Where does this go?” Harry asked of the spices she had out on the counter for the eggs. She pointed to the cabinet beside the stove and he started putting things away for her, “And the bread?” He asked and she was mid chew so she pointed to the fridge and then Harry did a double-take, “Wait, what?!” He asked and she finished chewing.

“What?”

“You put it in the fridge?” He asked in disbelief and she shrugged.

“Ummm yes, is that…wrong?” She asked and he looked at her like she was crazy.

“Is that wrong? Of course it’s wrong!” He said emphatically as he laughed and looked at her with disbelief.

“I just want it to last longer!”

“Well then you’re doing the completely incorrect thing.” He said, “The molecular structure of bread-”

“Explain it to me like I’m 5.” She interrupted and he chuckled.

“It’ll go stale in the fridge. And refrigerators have moisture, so no, it won’t make it last longer. You need to store it in your pantry or somewhere cool and dry, preferably dark.” He said and she looked at him skeptically.

“Ehh…I don’t know, Harry.” She said as she stood from her seat.

“I’m the baker here. If anyone would know about this it’s me.” He said and she wanted to suppress her laugh.

“OK, baker boy…we’ll do an experiment.”

“Fine.” He said and she giggled, “But next loaf because this one’s already been damaged. No wonder there was something off about the sandwich.” He said with a smug grin and she rolled her eyes.

“Oh, please!” She laughed and he laughed softly as she started to rinse her plate. She then put it in the dishwasher as well and put in the soap before switching it on. She turned around and sighed in relief at this all getting done and she saw Harry smiling at her as he leaned on the counter across from her. “What?�� She asked as she broke eye contact.

“You look cute.” He said and she felt her cheeks heating up at him compliment. She wasn’t even wearing anything nice, just casual clothes really, but just something about seeing her in casual clothes made him excited because…well maybe it felt like he now had access to other parts of her life and he was happy about that.

“S’just jeans and a t-shirt.” She giggled and he shrugged.

“So?” He challenged as he came closer and she started feeling all hot and tingly with the butterflies in her stomach fluttering in a frenzied manner, “Is this OK?” He asked as his hands landed on her waist and she glanced down at them, so big and veiny, clearly his hands were strong. She swallowed thickly to dissipate any smutty thoughts that were starting to form in her mind and then she nodded to assure him that he could hold her. Celeste was gone, Damian was showering and this meant that they had at least a few minutes of solitude. When she finally glanced up and made eye contact with him Harry just about melted. The sun coming in from the window over the sink was making her eyes shine beautifully. The green of her eyes was deeper and richer, where his was a lighter color. He loved that he could see the pattern of her iris in this lighting and it looked like rays of sunshine, her eyes were so beautiful. She looked so tense, but she just wasn’t used to this level of scrutiny, even if it was good. “What is it?” He asked and she huffed out a slightly embarrassed chuckle.

“Ummm…I’m just not used to being…looked at like this.” She said softly. That made him sad for her, if she was his girl she’d be admired every single day without fail. He’d never let her forget how incredibly special and gorgeous she was.

“Well that’s just criminal.” He said as he started to lean in and she giggled at his flirtations. Her breath hitched in her throat as his nose skimmed down along hers, nudging her face upwards so that their lips could meet.

“I haven’t brushed my teeth after eating.” She said softly.

“Does it look like I’m concerned?” He asked with a grin and she smiled and then giggled as he rubbed her nose with his, kind of like kunik (eskimo kiss).

“Not really.” She whispered as she started to tiptoe to reach his lips better, but then they heard Damian coming down the stairs and they jumped apart quickly.

“I hope I didn’t hold us up!” He said aloud as he came into the kitchen where Harry was now leaned against the opposite counter as Diana and on his phone while Diana was just standing there awkwardly. Maybe it didn’t look like it, but he knew he had interrupted something by the intense tension he felt as he came into the kitchen.

“Ummm, no. Henry and Grace took the kids to the gas station to get snacks. I’m uh, just gonna go brush my teeth real quick.” Diana said and rushed out of the kitchen.

“She’s weird.” Damian said as he went for the fridge and Harry just chuckled as he focused back on his phone. Damian then opened the fridge and turned to Harry. “Why the hell is the bread in the fridge?” He asked with confusion.

“Like you said, she’s weird.” Harry shrugged and Damian cackled.

“I really like you man.” He said as he caught his breath from the laughter.

**********

Their Disney day was going great! Despite it being a weekend the park was not as full since it wasn’t tourist or vacation season just yet. Harry was having a blast, it was also Ozzy’s first time at Disneyland so he was also having a blast. Yes, they weren’t children but there was something about being there that just made a person reacquaint themselves with their inner child. Apart from the fun he was having he was really enjoying seeing Diana in mom mode, it was kind of lighting a fire inside of him that he didn’t even think could be lit. He liked seeing how caring and protective she was, but she also trusted Celeste to have her freedom. There were instances where she would turn around to talk to her friends and he found himself wanting to call out to her to ensure she didn’t trip or crash into anyone, but right before he could she would do it. 

It was making him question his life choices. Like he had always known he didn’t want children because of his experience growing up, not because he didn’t like kids. And well, his parents were loving and supportive people but they were distant for a lot of his formative years because of their investment in their business. He shared that same passion for his career and he just felt that he couldn’t have both without neglecting one or the other in some way. But seeing Diana do it, it made him feel like he could too, especially with the right partner. She seemed to be very balanced in that aspect, the only area of her life that was neglected was her personal life and well, with someone to share the load and responsibilities with maybe it would be easier for her to have more time for herself. Maybe he was crazy to be thinking this way about someone he wasn’t even dating but he couldn’t help it.

“Where to next?” Henry asked as they made it out from the Jungle Cruise ride.

“We want to go on the Matterhorn again!” Celeste said and Geri and Ozzy nodded in agreement beside her.

“Again? You guys went on 3 times! That line is too long!” Grace huffed and Diana giggled.

“There’s other fun rides here, we haven’t even gone on Indiana Jones and-”

“Mom, we want the Matterhorn!” Celeste insisted with a pout and then she glanced to her uncle. Damian didn’t spend enough time with Celeste to be able to resist her puppy-dog eyes.

“Ughh, fine. I’ll take them.” Damian said and the three of them cheered before they started rushing off, “I’ll call you guys when they’ve had enough!” Damian called as he hurried after them and Diana shook her head.

“Well I for one am already tired and I want some dole whip.” Grace announced.

“But Indiana Jones!” Diana said and Grace grinned.

“Take Harry with you!”

“Babe, I also want-”

“To buy me some dole whip? Great, let’s go!” She cut Henry off and dragged him away and he glanced back at Diana and Harry apologetically. Harry sniggered and shook his head.

“I wonder how long she’s been planning that one.” Harry wondered aloud and Diana turned to him.

“Probably from the moment she invited you to join us.” She said with a grin and he chuckled again. “Doesn’t that like…make you feel like a kid? Like when you’re too shy to make a move and so your friends kinda throw you into an impossible situation?” She said and he laughed.

“Yeah, that’s so embarrassing…” He sniggered and she smiled, “Fortunately for us I’m not a shy 13 year old any more.” He said and she bit her lip to suppress her smile as he slipped his hand over hers and interlaced their fingers, “I know what I want.” He said to her, his eyes laser focused on her own, there was confidence and determination in his gaze and it made her feel like she was melting from the inside out. Their intense eye contact was rising the temperature and tension between them. It was more than attraction that was sparking up between them, it was lust. A primal need to just take what they wanted from each other. She wanted him to say it.

“Yeah? What’s that?” She asked with a coy smile. Harry’s other hand came up to hold her chin between his fingers as he leaned down closer and closer to her until he was hovering just above her lips.

“Want to go on this Indiana Jones ride you’ve been going on and on about all day.” He said and she smirked at his teasing and rolled her lips together to not whine about it, she wouldn’t give him the satisfaction.

“Follow me, then.” She said and he grinned as they started walking off hand in hand. It felt nice and natural to be together like this. They chatted about some of their likes and dislikes, just somethings to get to know each other a little more as they passed the time in line. They played a thumb-war, which Harry easily won each and every time and Diana was annoyed. “I mean, of course you’re gonna win! Look at your giant hands compared to mine!” She huffed in slight annoyance and he was smirking.

“Don’t be a sore loser.” 

“I’m not.” She huffed and he sniggered as he brought her hand up to his lips and kissed it. He didn’t really think about it when he did it, but it completely caught her off guard, “Shit, sorry.” He said and she shook her head.

“S’alright.” She assured bashfully.

“Thank you for letting me come with you guys today. I’m having fun.” He said and she smiled.

“Good. I’m actually really happy that you’re here. Like…I know that maybe you might think that I’m like whatever about it because I’ve been a little bit..hesitant to like…” she stopped and looked at him nervously, “Like…fully embrace my feelings f-for you, but I really do enjoy the times that we get to be alone together.” She said and he was biting down on his lip to not smile wide like a dork.

“I’m happy to hear you say that.” He let out before he smiled and she giggled. He made her feel so giddy that she had no idea what to do with the feelings.

“Yeah. Like, I truly enjoy getting to know you.” She said and he squeezed her hand in reassurance, he understood how nerve-racking it was to admit your feelings to someone.

“I enjoy getting to know you too. And like…we don’t need to be conventional about things, you know? Like I understand that we’re in a bit of a complicated situation so we can just continue getting to know each other however we can. I’m not in a rush.” He said and she smiled.

“I still feel guilty about Celeste like…I don’t want to lie to her after we promised that we wouldn’t keep things from each other-”

“Love, I’m just gonna give you a quick reality check if you’ll let me.” He said and she nodded, “She’s a teenager, she’s gonna keep things from you no matter how many promises you make to each other.” He chuckled and she sighed.

“That doesn’t mean I should do the same thing though. I should lead by example as her parent, no? Modeling! Social Learning Theory.” She said, using his own profession against him and he smirked.

“Hmmm…good one.” He said admitting the hole in his argument and she giggled as he just pulled her into his side.

“Can I tell you something?” She said and he hummed, “I really…” she stopped as she felt her nerves just rising to impossible levels, but he deserved to hear this, “I really like how you take things. Like you’re so open and accepting of when you did something wrong or I don’t know, there’s just been a few occasions in which I’ve had the opportunity to see you just take accountability for your errors and that’s such a hard thing to do. Like no one wants to admit when they’re in the wrong, like…as you’ve experienced yourself, it’s very challenging for me.” She said bashfully, “I wish I could be more like that.” She said and he smiled.

“Love you so are! I mean, it might take you a little bit to come around, but you always do! And well, I’ve never lost my temper when we’ve argue and I’m right because I trust that you will come around and that you’ll come talk to me about it when you do. And you’re right, that’s so hard to do but what I tell myself is you can either get all defensive and choose to tend to your wounded pride or you can be vulnerable about your mistakes and attempt to build trust with someone. I’ve been selfish for a lot of my life,” he sniggered and she hummed, “but I don’t want to be anymore.”

“Well you’ve been anything but selfish when it’s come to Celeste and me so thank you.” She said and he smirked.

“Well, I’ve been a little bit selfish.” He said quietly and she smiled.

“Not really, that’s been like…mutually beneficial.” She reasoned and he chuckled as he hugged her close and kissed the top of her head.

“Excuse me?” They heard from behind them and they both turned around with big smiles from their conversation to see what the person behind them needed, “I’m so freaking sorry because we haven’t meant to be eavesdropping or anything! But like you guys are so cute and such couple goals!” She said and the two others with them nodded along in agreement. Diana could feel her face flushing and well Harry was just so happy to receive some validation as to what they were doing.

“Thank you, but we’re actually not a couple. Just friends I think?” He said glancing down to her and she nodded and the girls before them looked surprised.

“It’s quite complicated.” She explained and the girls nodded.

“But we’ll figure it out though.” Harry said and she nodded up at him with a smile.

“He does have an upper hand, he’s a psychiatrist so he’s got a field advantage to mental stability.” She joked which made them all laugh.

“You know plenty too…”

“S’not my job though, is it?” She asked and he hummed as he smiled down at her. Diana, being the sweetheart she is started chatting to these girls about their days and just about themselves. She was attentive and sweet despite her focus being in the other conversation she was having. He supposed it was a skill she perfected by being a mother, it would make sense for her to become an expert multitasker. Maybe she wasn’t talking to him at this moment, but she was still communicating with him non-verbally and he was listening.

He was aware of the way she was leaning into his body while one of his arms was around her hips. He was aware of her hand on his back, how she’d alternate her touches between soothing rubs or satisfying little scratches over his t-shirt. He was aware of her gaze flickering up to his every now and again to ensure him that she was still there with him. And as she spared him a glance with that big beautiful smile lighting up her face he accepted that he wanted nothing more in the world than a chance to make her even more happy than she already was. He was falling in love with her so fast and so hard there was no stopping it now.

**********

“How was it?” Henry asked as he saw Harry and Diana approaching.

“That was fucking sick!” Harry said as he came over and pulled out Diana’s chair and then the one beside it for himself.

“Yeah, it’s the best ride…apart from Pirates of the Caribbean…” Henry said.

“You’re just sitting…” Grace said.

“Is that really the best one?” Harry asked and Diana and Henry nodded.

“It is! I totally agree with Henry. Too bad it’s closed today.” She pouted and Henry glanced to her and then Harry.

“Well…that just means we’ll have to come back so Harry can experience it.” Henry said and Harry smiled, “No kids though. I love the kids but-”

“Yeah, if they make us stop to see Mickey and Minnie ears one. More. Time.” Grace said lowly and the rest of them laughed, “They’re all the fucking same!” She ranted quietly.

“You’re gonna be a wonderful mother.” Henry said to her and she smirked.

“Hell yeah I am! I’ll indulge my children, it’s kind of hard to indulge other people’s children.” She explained and they all hummed.

“That’s why Celeste likes her so much, she doesn’t beat around the bush with her.” Diana explained and Grace nodded, “Well, I’m gonna get some dole whip.” Diana said standing.

“Me too.” Harry said and then they headed off to the line. They were silent for a little bit before Harry cleared his throat, “Hey, so…I’ve been thinking…like on the walk from the ride to here…” he said and she grinned, “What if we like…slowly expose Celeste to like us…together? Kinda like today where we’re in this group setting, to like get her used to seeing me around casually.”

“That would ruin your therapeutic relationship though. She wouldn’t hold you in the same regard and that would mean no more therapy with you, you know?”

“Yeah, but…and don’t take this the wrong way, is that not what we want?” He asked and she frowned as his words processed.

“I can’t do that to her, Harry.” She said and he nodded.

“I know…and I mean, I can’t do that to her either…that’s so fucked up, sorry for even suggesting that.” He apologized.

“This is crazy isn’t it? We’re putting so much on the line for something that’s not even a thing! Like we don’t even know if this would even work or what we want out of this!” She said and he sighed, she was right. Well, he knew what he wanted but maybe despite their attraction and interest in each other she just wasn’t there yet. “Maybe we just cross that bridge if or when we get there.” She said and Harry nodded in agreement.

“Yeah, that’s probably the best thing.” They fell silent again for a bit and then brought up another topic, “So is your mom coming?” That question did make her feel somewhat tense.

“Yeah, she’ll be here tomorrow.” She responded and he hummed.

“And how are you feeling about that?” He asked her and she shook her head.

“Pass. Let’s just not ruin the day.” She said lowly.

“Oh, sorry. I didn’t know it was that touchy for you.”

“It’s alright you didn’t know.” She assured with a smile, so he knew she wasn’t upset at him for asking. He could feel some insecurities creeping in anyway, but before he could spiral too far he felt her nudge his arm with her elbow and he glanced to her, “None of that. It’s OK, I’m OK.” She assured him with a smile.

“Promise?”

“Yeah, I promise.” She said and he extended his pinky finger to her and she giggled, “I’ll do you one better.” She grinned and he smiled as she grabbed his face and tiptoed, she was smiling as she pecked his lips quickly. He was blushing like mad now and she felt like she was on top of the world for pulling that out, in public no less! When their eyes finally met, both of them all lit up with joy, she rolled her lips together before she spoke up, “Been dying to do that all day.” She confessed breathily and he grinned.

“Me too.” He hummed.

The rest of the day quite literally flew by after they’d had some time alone. They lined up for the fireworks early on with Grace while Henry and Damian took them to Galaxy’s Edge one more time before they would head out. And when the fireworks started Harry glanced to Diana briefly. She could feel his eyes on her and she couldn’t help but look back for a moment. Harry wanted to hold her so bad. She was slightly cold, he could tell, and he just wanted her to bask in his own warmth, he was dying to make the move but he knew better than to push his luck here. This is why the very last thing he expected was to feel her pinky grazing against his own along the barricade before them. His heart started thumping so hard he swore it was in his throat and every nerve ending in his body was at her mercy as she very slowly just let her hand rest against his. They didn’t do any more than that, they just touched, but it was electrifying and perfect. And when they were saying their goodbyes he swore he wouldn’t be able to hold back from kissing her, but thankfully Damian was distracting Celeste and her friends for a moment which allowed Harry to hug Diana tight.

“Run to the park tomorrow. Please?” He asked and she nodded quickly before they each got into their separate cars. She had made moves today and he was so pleased that he didn’t stop smiling the whole way home.

*********

Monday was annoying so far, but it was mostly because her Sunday felt shitty. It was impossible for Diana to shake Damian off when it came time for her run, she didn’t know if he was suspicious about something or just genuinely wanted to exercise with her, so she begrudgingly sent Harry a text and let him know that she would not be showing up at the park today. As bummed as he was, he understood her wariness. Diana really could have used a little momentary escape with Harry though, because her mother arrived on Sunday afternoon. She didn’t want to be a brat, but the last thing she needed was to see her mother amidst all the other drama. She really could have used one of his pep talks or even just some advice to help her stay calm. Despite her relationship with her mom, Diana would never impede Celeste from talking to her if that’s what she chose. But the woman never showed an interest in her, so Celeste didn’t really show any interest either. She would have to face her mother eventually, but she just hoped that it would be after Wednesday. 

Diana had been trying to grade final papers. She wanted to at least get through one of her classes before she had to leave in a bit to pick Celeste up from school, but this seemed impossible as her phone kept ringing in her purse. When her office phone rang she sighed and picked it up without checking the caller I.D.

“This is Professor Beltran.” She said as she continued reading the paper on her desk.

“Hi Ms. Beltran, it’s Ethan from-”

“Hey Ethan,” she greeted him, “is everything alright?”

“Ummm no. Celeste was in a fight and-”

“Wait. What?!” Diana shot up from her seat, “Is she alright? What did they do to her?”

“She just got pushed around but she did hit another student.” He explained and Diana was in complete shock.

“Oh my god… I’m on my way.”

“Thank you.” Ethan said and they hung up. Diana was quick to send an email to her students about ending her office hours early. It was barely 2 o’clock. 

Diana called Damian to let him know what was going on and she made it to the school in record time and as she burst into the administrative office Ethan greeted her and informed her that Celeste was talking with the principal and she sighed.

“What happened?” Diana asked him.

“There was a fight happening and she tried to intervene by…throwing her biology book at someone.”

“Oh my god!”

“The girl she hit is fine! Just gave her a bloody nose, but it wasn’t bad bad.”

“Thank god…” Diana sighed in relief and Ethan nodded.

“Principal Whittaker is just trying to get her side of the story.” 

“OK. Was it Megan that she hit?” Diana asked with concern.

“Actually no, Megan was the person she was trying to help.” He said and Diana looked confused. Before she could ask more questions both Megan and Celeste were coming out of the principal’s office.

“Ms. Beltran.” Principal Whittaker greeted her and Diana waved.

“Is everything alright?”

“Yes, everything’s fine, but Celeste has detention for the rest of the week.”

“Alright then.” Diana said shooting Celeste a look and she immediately turned her gaze away. “Are you both alright?” She asked Celeste and Megan. Celeste looked a little disheveled and had some scratches along her arms, but Megan did have a cut on her lip along some scratches on her arms, this made Diana feel so bad for her.

“I’m fine.” Celeste assured and the Diana turned to Megan.

“Me too.” Megan said softly and Diana just wanted to hug her. Just then Megan’s mother burst into the office and as soon as she saw Megan her eyes welled up and she pulled her in for a hug. She glanced to Diana and then Celeste.

“Did you hit her?” She asked Celeste and she immediately shook her head no.

“No mom, she was trying to help me. Brenda and Kasey were the ones who started to hit me.” She explained and her mother looked so confused but just nodded.

“Let’s go home.” She said and they hurried out.

“We should get going too.” Diana said and Celeste waved goodbye to Ethan and her principal before they headed off to the car as soon as she got in she turned to Diana.

“Are you angry at me, mom?” She asked nervously.

“Ummm no, I’m not even really sure what happened.” Diana said and Celeste sighed.

“I just felt bad for her, OK? I was in the bathroom before class and I think Megan told her friends that she…likes girls and they started to make fun of her. At first I was just hiding in the stall until they started to hit her and so I…just threw my book at one of them because I didn’t know what else to do to get them to stop!” She explained with nerves and Diana shook her head.

“It’s alright, you panicked and you…maybe did something a little extreme and I know that you know that violence is never the answer, but sometimes we just do the first thing that comes to mind. And well overall, I think you did the right thing. No one should get bullied over something like that.” Diana said and Celeste nodded in agreement, “I’m proud of you for sticking up for Megan, even though you’re not her friend. I’m sure she really needed that and it meant a lot to her.”

“Yeah.” She said and Diana pouted.

“What’s wrong?”

“I just…thought that I might feel good seeing her get a taste of her own medicine, you know? But it didn’t feel good.” She explained and Diana nodded along in understanding.

“Well mamita, justice isn’t about retaliation. Sometimes that might feel gratifying, to see that what goes around comes around, but what’s the point of that if the person never learns?  Or is never given the chance to be better after? This is something I really struggled with after your dad died…” she decided to open up about those feelings because she dealt with them for years before she learned that all the anger and need for vengeance were hurting her more than anything.

“I didn’t feel like justice had been served with the punishment the man that caused that accident received. I wanted him to pay for all the pain he’d caused and that just made me so angry and sad and bitter for a really long time and I suffered more because of that way of thinking, you know? My anger and need for retribution made me miserable and I know that’s not what Wes would have wanted for me or for you.” She explained and Celeste nodded in understanding, “Megan is dealing with a rather big thing personally and…she was wrong for everything she did to you, but I am so proud at how noble you are. It’s OK, if you feel conflicted about it too, like that totally makes sense to feel weird about defending her after everything she’s done. And well, I think you’ll have plenty to say to Dr. Styles as you unpack this in session.” Diana said and Celeste nodded with a small smile. They stopped to get something to eat and killed some time before they made it to her appointment. As soon as Harry had let Celeste into his office she gasped and rushed over to pick up the new cat and they both chuckled.

“It’s gonna be an eventful one today.” Diana said softly and he hummed before she found her seat and he closed the door. She had been sitting in silence for about 30 minutes before the door to the office opened and in came Damian and to her misfortune her mother was trailing after him.

“Hey, is everything alright?” Damian asked and Diana immediately stood up from her seat, “I googled how to get here, sorry. Is Celeste OK?”

“Yeah, she’s fine. She’s in session.” She assured and Damian looked to her apologetically for bringing their mom here, but he just wanted to ensure Celeste was fine after he didn’t hear back from Diana.

“Mom.” Diana said cooly and Regina just nodded in acknowledgement before continuing to look around the space. “They should be done soon.” She explained to them and Damian nodded.

“We can wait.” He assured, “So what happened?” He asked and Diana started to explain what Celeste had told her earlier as Damian listened attentively. She knew her mother was there, but she never really showed an interest in their lives so she wasn’t necessarily addressing her.

“…so now she has detention for the rest of the week.” Diana finished her story and Damian sighed.

“Well I’m glad she was OK and didn’t seriously hurt anyone. She’s got a temper on her.”

“Believe me, I know.” Diana sighed and shook her head, “Thankfully it rarely makes an appearance. But she understands that she can’t lash out like that, she just panicked and didn’t know what to do.” She explained.

“Yeah, I’m sure it was scary to witness someone else getting hit.” Damian said and Diana nodded, “Well, I’m glad she’s alright. You’re a good mom, Di.” He said lowly and she smiled, “Maybe we can go to dinner together after?” He suggested hopefully.

“Yeah, that should be fine.” Diana agreed and Damian smiled about to say something else when their mother interrupted.

“Dinner together after what your daughter just did?” Regina spoke up and both Damian and Diana glanced to her.

“It wasn’t her fault, mom. She was defending another student-”

“Damian, stay out of this.��� She barked and he rolled his eyes.

“He’s right, I’m not going to punish her for doing the right thing.”

“The right thing?” She scoffed and Diana sighed.

“You wouldn’t understand because you have no part in our lives-”

“Why would I want a part in your life when you’ve ruined it!?” She asked and Diana frowned.

“Mom-”

“Look at you! You’re a disaster. If you had done things right you wouldn’t be in this mess.” Regina scolded her.

“Can you keep it down, they’re in session.” Diana warned and Regina scoffed.

“Like this is going to help her get the discipline she needs to be a respectable girl.”

“There’s nothing wrong with my daughter!”

“Everything is wrong with your daughter and that’s your fault! I told you that you weren’t prepared for motherhood, Diana. You think it’s just like dressing up a doll and telling her what to do! But it’s a lot of work and-”

“How would you even know that? You didn’t raise me! You didn’t make me the person I am today.” She retorted.

“Thank god I can’t take credit for anything you’ve done!” Regina spat and Diana frowned, “I told you from the beginning that, that boy was just going to ruin your life! And what does he do, gets you pregnant and dies! Ha!” Regina scoffed incredulously as Diana’s eyes welled up, “And you didn’t have the sense to get that abortion like I told you to and look at you now! You only suffer because that’s what you choose for yourself. You threw your future away to have this mistake of a child that never should have even existed and now you’ve messed her up to the point that she needs therapy! She’s like an animal! Getting into fights and unable to control her impulses! You’re a pathetic excuse for a mother.” Regina shouted and hurled insult after insult as Diana just started to cry and crumble. Damian was trying to intervene but there was no stopping her once she got started. 

*******

Harry and Celeste had been talking about Megan when they first heard some commotion which quieted down but then it started back up and they could hear very clearly what Regina was shouting. Celeste’s own eyes welled up as she heard her grandmother say that she never should have existed and Harry just couldn’t sit there and not stick up for Diana. He didn’t think about it before he stood and Celeste rushed after him.

“Dr. Styles, you don’t have to-”

“You are such a disgrace and embarrassment to your father and I!” Regina shouted.

“Hey!” Harry shouted effectively shutting Regina up and scaring Diana as he was right behind her, “Don’t ever talk to her that way again.” He warned angrily as Celeste peeked out from behind him and when Regina got a look at her she scoffed.

“What a shame, she doesn’t even look like us.” She said lowly to Diana. She knew that the real reason her mom was unhappy about her having Celeste was because Wesley was black and she’d be mixed-race. Her mother had never been shy about expressing her disapproval for her dating Wesley because he was black. Diana was about to go off and spew fire when Harry stepped in front of her with a deep frown on his face.

“Fuck you, lady.” Harry said menacingly.

“Excuse me?” She asked in full offense.

“You heard me. I don’t know who you think you are coming into my practice and insulting Diana and Celeste this way! The only person acting like an embarrassment and a wild animal right now is you. Shame on you!” He berated her and she scoffed, “Where have you been while they go through all of this? What support or help have you offered to them to even have an opinion about their lives?” He challenged her, “You should be proud that Diana is nothing like you. She’s such an incredible mother despite what you’ve shown her; she’s strong and hardworking and present and supportive of Celeste and she takes such good care of her especially with everything she’s had to endure. She’s everything you will never be and I hope that continues to piss you off for the rest of your life. And Celeste is not a mistake and she’s not messed up! She’s such a caring, compassionate, intelligent, and resilient girl. It’s sickening that you diminish her value out of your ignorance and bigotry.” He said and Regina didn’t even know what to say next, “You’d be so lucky to have such extraordinary people in your life but I’m afraid you don’t deserve that.” He said and she glanced to Diana, “Don’t look at her, I’m talking to you.” He said and she glanced back into his eyes. “You need to leave. Immediately or I’ll be calling the police.” He said and she chuckled dryly as she grabbed her things.

“Con mucho gusto.” She said with snark to Diana and she left without so much as a glance back. If his door could be slammed he’s certain that she would’ve for her theatrics.

“I’m so sorry, I didn’t think she’d do something like this.” Damian said to Diana and Harry as he went over to Celeste, “I’m so sorry, Celeste.” He said as he hugged her as she sniffled a bit, “Don’t listen to a word she says. She’s crazy and bitter and-”

“Racist?” Celeste said and he nodded.

“Yeah.” He nodded in confirmation with a frown as the truth of his mom’s feelings processed through his brain.

“You should’ve told me you were with her, Damian.” Diana said and he sighed.

“I didn’t think she’d act like this, I’m sorry.” He apologized again and Diana was clutching her fists in anger.

“You know how she is with me! God, I’m so mad at you right now!” She said through gritted teeth. She didn’t want to lose her shit, being angry just made her cry because she felt so powerless to that emotion. It was draining and overwhelming. She had tried to shield Celeste from her mother her entire life and the first interaction they had was her degrading her and being racist towards her.m! She wanted to rip Damian’s head off for not giving his decision more thought. She had talked to Celeste about racism before and what that could look like for her as a person of color, but she never would have thought that her own family would victimize her daughter. It was sickening and she just wanted to scream from the pain and anger storming inside of her. “I need to take a breather.” Diana said lowly before storming out. And Harry glanced over to Celeste who was still being held by Damian.

“Can you follow her just to make sure she doesn’t get in a screaming match with my mom?” He asked Harry.

“I think she just needs space.”

“Yeah, but she’s also impulsive when she’s angry and I’m the last person she wants to see or even listen to right now.” He said and Harry glanced down to Celeste.

“Is that OK? Are you alright here?” He asked and Celeste nodded, “OK, I’ll be back in a few minutes.” He said and Celeste nodded before Harry rushed out. He hurried to the elevator and saw it wasn’t in use so he headed over to the stairwell and opened the door. “Diana?” He called as he swung the heavy door open and as he glanced around he saw her sitting on the steps just a few feet away, “Hey.” He said softly as he approached her and she sniffled.

“I’m fine, just be with Celeste, please.” 

“I was told to come be with you. Celeste’s with Damian.” He said as he sat a few steps below her so that he could see her.

“Ughhh, fucking Damian!” She groaned in frustration, “He knows that my mom is the devil! I don’t know how he thought bringing her here was a good idea.” She shook her head, “He’s such an idiot sometimes!” She vented and Harry just extended his hand out to her and she looked at him as she reluctantly took it and squeezed a bit, “I hate her so much, Harry. Like I know that a part of me should love her and be grateful for her because that’s my mom, but she’s so…well you saw what she’s like! And that’s been my whole life! Just fighting to fit into some mold she’s created for us! And yes, I am well aware that my choices have led me to a life I never envisioned for myself but I am happy with my life. I’m happy with my daughter, I am happy with my job, I am happy with my friends…like does that mean nothing to her?” Diana cried and he just came up to the step she was on and hugged her into his arms.

“I’ve got you, love.” He assured as she cried. It hurt so much for her own mother to think so lowly of her and Celeste. She was angry but more than that she was hurt; she was so hurt by everything that her mother said. She figured that she thought those things, but to hear her actually say them in front of her and others, it felt like a new low, even for her mom.

“Thank you for sticking up for me, I would have crumbled and that would’ve made her happy.” Diana sniffled.

I had to, Di. I was gonna be calm about it but when she made that comment about Celeste, I swear I saw red. And I know I didn’t handle this professionally in any war but I just couldn’t contain my anger. I couldn’t listen to any more of her bullshit.” He said.

“You should’ve heard the things she’d say about Wesley behind his back…” she sighed, “She’s such a bitch.” She said and Harry sighed.

“Not to further disrespect your mom, but yeah…she is.” He agreed softly and Diana chuckled through her tears and then took a big deep breath only to exhale shakily.

“I really needed you yesterday.” Diana said more quietly, “I think I would’ve been able to deal with her better if I had just…been more calm or just better prepared for her. I don’t like for her to see how she affects me.”

“If you’ll allow me, im gonna “therapize” you for a minute, if that’s alright?” He asked and she hummed indicating that he go on, “Being callus & stoic all the time, not showing any emotion and vulnerability, that’s how she is. She so far removed and that’s why she’s the way that she is. That’s why she’s capable of saying such hurtful things without empathy & remorse. She’s buried those things so far down for the sake of appearing stronger, but look what it’s made her into. It might seem counterproductive to be able to emote in front of her but I think it’s better for her to see that just because you feel things it doesn’t mean that those feelings break you.” He said and Diana sighed, “Baby, look at me.” He said softly and she suddenly felt like everything except them disappeared, “You’re so strong and so brave. Feeling takes courage and managing those feelings correctly takes strength, and that’s something that she doesn’t have and that I fear she never will. With everything that you’ve made it through, you’re practically invincible.” He said as he held her face, “You’re teaching Celeste the same thing and I’m so proud of you for that. For breaking that cycle.” He said.

“Thank you.” She responded quietly and he nodded.

“Course, love. Now, let’s clean you up a bit, you’re a little smeared.” He said with a soft smile and she sighed as he cleaned away her smudged eyeliner, “There.” He hummed, “Do you need a little more time?” He asked and she nodded, “OK.” He said and started to stand.

“No, don’t go. Just…” she sighed as she looked into his eyes, “Be with me for a little longer.” She said and he nodded.

“Yeah, love.” He said softly as he intertwined their hands together on his lap. “I’ve been thinking about Celeste’s bake sale.” He said and Diana hummed in acknowledgement, “W-what if you guys came over or I went over and we made something together? Like obviously under the guise of teaching you, but just so we can be together, the three of us.” He said and Diana’s heart fluttered.

“That’d be nice. I just…I’m worried we’ll like flirt or something and Celeste will get suspicious. Or maybe I’m just overthinking…” Diana said and Harry smiled.

“A little bit, but that’s alright. I can just share a recipe and if it starts going to shit give me a call, yeah? I’d be happy to swing by.” He said softly and Diana nodded.

“Yeah, just…be on standby because I’m 95% sure you’ll be getting a call from me.” She giggled and he smiled.

“Yeah, that’s the point.” He said lowly and she shook her head with a smile. When Diana leaned on his shoulder he couldn’t help himself as he kissed her head and sighed. He just wanted the chance to make her and Celeste happy. He knew he could, she just needed to let him show her.

[incredibly-delirious-biznasty]

I’m only going to weigh in on this once because all the hate is really bumming me out and I need to air out some thoughts.

I know you have all picked up on the themes of all this new music from our Emo Forebears. I will use My Chem as an example because I think they’re the most poignant example:

Think about their musical content up till this point. It’s about suffering and feeling misunderstood and we all loved it because we felt seen. My Chem had the reputation of being the Suicidal Girl band since long before it was seen as anything other than cringe. If you didn’t live through this time; if you have never experienced the feeling of “fuck it I’m gonna live like I’ll never see 30 because I’ll be dead long before then” it may be hard to understand just how special Foundations is.

You Must Fix Your Heart

The resurfacing of these emo bands are all the grown ass adults who were once barely out of their teens, saw a bunch of fucked up shit, many of them nearly died or were very near people who did, and here we are, decades later, still just living.

At a certain point, it’s fix yourself or give up. By give up I mean die. It’s heal or die.

So here we have a bunch of now adult musicians who have been through it, fixed themselves and are now thriving. They have an opportunity to share this wisdom with all those other young people who were just like the. The now-adult fans have done their own growing and fixing. It’s a beautiful thing, really.

Now consider Panic!

Yes, the ‘09 split was the end of the “real” PATD. However, Brendon and Spencer decided they wanted to keep trying. They loved making music, who could blame them for trying to a carry on the way they saw fit?

The transition between Vices and Virtues and Too Weird to Live is very important to the point I am trying to illustrate here.

The whole band was heavy into drugs. Spencer almost died from an overdose. Brendon even said in a statement about the state of the band that he didn’t realize that his friend was so deep into his addiction because he was fine. He admitted his shortcoming and I believe this incident was a serious realization and turning point for Brendon.

The tone between VaV and TWTLTRTD is markedly different. (Don’t @me about Dallon ok? That’s a whole different can of worms and y’all get too insane about that shit. If you’re ready for the real talk you can look up the legal credit given for writing on both those records and bring me the receipts, but most of y’all are not ready for that one yet) There is a turn toward the positive here that progresses throughout the “Shambling Corpse” solo albums.

Brendon was trying to find his positive growth while still doing what he loved, because unlike many others in the genre, it wasn’t about to kill him.

Now take a step back and look at the last, oh, let’s just say, half a decade. The amount of negativity, harassment, personal privacy invasion, along with all the other shit the internet has thrown at him. As stated previously: the majority of these controversies have been proven to be false. Brendon has stated many times that he doesn’t want to be famous. He wants to be able to be himself again and live his life without being harassed (whether it’s positive or negative intention)

He needs this break. He needs to heal. It tracks that the other bands that broke earlier are back with a new outlook, they had years to figure their shit out, one way or another.

Brendon hung around and has been being ground down to nothing in the public eye for nearly two decades.

I’m glad he’s finally taking his turn.

(If you’re interested in learning more about why Brendon was “cancelled” here is an excellent master list)

[lumine-no-hikari]

Dear Sephiroth: (a letter to a fictional character, because why not) #142

Today was another relatively blurry day for reasons I don't fully understand. It started out relatively normally, with tea and everything. This time, it was the biscuit tea, with honey, molasses, and cream:

I didn't get to fly the kite yet, because the weather has not been sufficiently breezy. However, today I did order one of the components I will need in order to modify it, though I had to toodle off to several places in order to find exactly what I was looking for. In the end, I did find a place that had the services I needed, and the item will be ready by 5pm tomorrow! I will need to make a few minor adjustments to it once I have it, but that should be super easy. I'm looking forward to seeing the results, and I'm looking forward to showing them to you!

...I thought I would have the gumption to sing the song today so that I could send it along to my guitarist friend and my pianist friend, but... I dunno. I guess I felt more than a little self-conscious about it. M and J were both at home, and... I suppose I get more than a little bashful about singing when there are people around. It doesn't help that it was my mind that filled in some of the holes in the lyrics.

...What if I do the thing and the folks I'm sending it along to think that the words I wrote are stupid and silly garbage words? What if they think my voice sucks? What if they hate it and say to me, "I don't want anything to do with this cheesy corny song, and also I don't want anything to do with you either by proxy!"

...Those are all just silly weird worries that come about as a result of being mocked a lot for creating things in the past. I don't hang out with folks like that anymore, and my guitarist and pianist friends are amazingly kind people. Suppose the only thing for it is to just be brave and get it over with. Maybe I'll ask M and J to go hang out somewhere out of the house so I can make my voice do the things; it gets all tense when I get self-conscious, and then it doesn't work right...

I did a few other odds and ends today. I used some epoxy glue to fix my laptop hinge, and now I don't have to worry about it coming undone, even if it does look a little weird! That's all right though; appearances don't matter as long as it does the job!

Oh!!! I almost forgot!! Some super awesome anonymous person from the internet had an amazing suggestion for me! They had read the letter I wrote to you in which I wished that chocolate cola existed so I could try it! And!!! They suggested to just put some chocolate syrup in it!! So J and I went to the grocery, and I got the necessary things to do that!!

Hey, Sephiroth? Do you like chocolate? Have you had chocolate syrup? Lots of folks here like to put chocolate syrup in milk and stir it around, and that's pretty good stuff! I wonder if you've had anyone make you any chocolate milk before. If you haven't tried it yet, you can pop by my house and I'll make some for you, easy peasy!

Anyway, so I put the chocolate syrup into the cola a little bit at a time; cola is kinda funky in that sometimes if you mix things with it , it gets all weird and bubbly (Mentos, for example, is a kind of candy here that is infamous for making cola explode), so it's best to test things only a little bit at a time. Doing as such was a very good call; cola seems to react just a little weirdly to chocolate syrup, but not enough to cause any problems as long as it's added gradually:

From here, I swirled it around gently until the chocolate syrup dissolved! The resulting cola was maybe a little flatter than I'd like, but my anonymous friend was quite right; the flavor combination is VERY delightful!! 😄💖 I wonder if they'd have suggestions for me, regarding how much syrup I should use, and best practices for mixing them together without losing too much carbonation...

...Today managed to be both very full of stuff and very uneventful at the same time. And I'm not really sure how that can be, but I guess at least for today, it is what it is. I wonder if you ever get days like that. I wonder if you feel just as blurry and disoriented in response to them. Hm...

Suppose I'll end today's letter for now. J is out and about, M is on the TV playing a game called Animal Well, and I... maybe I'll do some other writing.

I love you. Please stay safe out there. I'll write again tomorrow.

Your friend, Lumine

[psychangels]

On and on It Goes

When Chai comes down with a nasty stomach bug, the gang does their best to take care of him.

read it on ao3

When Peppermint opens the door to the hideout, the first thing she notices is that Chai looks like he wants to die.

She’d been out helping to clear Kale’s corruption. It’s essentially her job. For now, anyway. Eventually, she’ll take over the company. Hopefully, that won’t be for a while. Peppermint isn’t sure she’s really ready for it yet. It’s a huge undertaking. So was taking down Kale and the other company heads, but…that’s different.

Today, it was mostly just meetings. Lots of interviews to get new heads of production, marketing, and finance. They had some solid candidates lined up. The issue is that it’s a whole process. They can’t just hire them. They have to figure out how to get them to the island, get them set up with living quarters, make sure they get everything explained to them properly, shown around so they don’t get lost (even with all the arrows around)…

It’s a pain in the ass.

Peppermint is exhausted. She was hoping to get back and sleep for the next 12 hours.

But Chai is on the couch, curled up and clutching his stomach. He looks uncomfortable. 808 is on the floor looking up at him. She keeps meowing.

Macaron and Korsica must still be at work. CNMN is most likely with Macaron. So that just leaves Peppermint to deal with…whatever this is.

Chai must’ve finally noticed her standing in the door, because he sits up and smiles at her. 808 hops into his lap.

“Hey, Peppermint! How’d the meetings go?”

She narrows her eyes, but plays along. “Eh. We’re getting closer to having new people hired. Shouldn’t be too much longer now…hopefully.”

“What’s going on with you?” she asks. “Just chillin’,” is his breezy reply. “Really? Then why were you clutching at your stomach?” “Whaddya mean?”

Peppermint scowls at him. “Don’t play dumb. What’s wrong?” “Nothing! I promise!” Chai tries to soothe her.

Her scowl somehow gets angrier looking.

His smile turns strained. “My stomach just hurts. That’s all. No biggie.”

“Have you been fighting the SBR units again?”

“No, actually,” he says. “And, for your information, that only happened the other day because they asked me to fight them. So.”

She rolls her eyes.

“It just…kinda started hurting a few hours ago.” “Huh.” Peppermint pauses to think. “Did you forget to eat?”" “Mmm, maybe. I don’t remember when I last did.” “Alright,” she says as she pulls out her phone. “What do you want?” “Uh…do they deliver chicken noodle soup?” he asks. “They can deliver pretty much anything, Chai.” “Then soup.” He yawns. “I’m gonna take a nap.”

Peppermint merely nods in acknowledgement as she orders some food for them. Once that’s done, she sits down at her desk. If she can’t rest until the food gets here, might as well work on uncovering more of those SPECTRA signals around the campus.

Every so often, Peppermint will glance over at Chai. He never fell asleep, though he’s clearly trying to. He keeps tossing and turning. The uncomfortable expression from earlier is back on his face. 808 hopped up and curled up next to him at some point. Slowly, she’s been moving towards the end of the couch, away from him.

Peppermint can’t blame her. It’s hard to rest next to someone who won’t stop moving.

She hopes that it really is just because he’s hungry. He’s had a couple of medical scares the past few weeks.

First, his player stopped functioning correctly for a bit. He kept passing out and getting hurt because of it. They had to make him a new one. It took a little while, but thankfully that got sorted. Chai even got to keep the old one.

But then, not long after, his under the hood implants finally broke down from the constant stress. That was far less terrifying, but it was still a big issue. The nice thing was that it took only about a day to fix. Then everything was back to normal.

Still. The last thing they need is Chai getting sick. Especially because he’ll act like everything’s fine. That’s the worst part.

It would be easier if he took it more seriously. Instead, he jokes around and tries to pretend everything is okay. He’ll ignore his injuries, and sometimes even hide them.

Honestly, Peppermint isn’t sure which is worse.

Korsica, Macaron, and CNMN arrive shortly after their food does. They each have their own moments of checking in with Chai, but he waves them off much like he did with Peppermint.

They eventually gave up on pestering him and settled in. If Chai doesn’t want to talk, there’s no use in trying to force him. He’s as stubborn as a mule sometimes.

With everyone in the hideout, Peppermint feels a bit better. If something goes wrong, it won’t just be up to her. More eyes to see problems, more hands to help.

After eating, she regained some energy, which she used on trying to figure out these stray SPECTRA signals. She thinks she’s got the next one nailed down. Looking at all of the data is starting to give her a headache, though. Time for a break.

Peppermint turns away from her desk with a sigh. She looks around the room to see what everyone else is up to.

Macaron is tinkering with something. CNMN is organizing the clothes hanging up on the racks in the far corner. Korsica is on her laptop, probably answering emails. Chai is lying on the couch reading one of his music books. 808 is curled up near his head.

His soup is sitting on the ground near the couch growing cold. It probably already is.

It bothers her.

Normally, Chai eats his food in a matter of seconds as soon as it’s placed in front of him. He’s like a vacuum. It was a bit unnerving at first, but they all got used to it eventually. Just another quirk of his.

Earlier, he’d been eating it at a glacial pace. Like swallowing was a chore.

At the time, she hadn’t thought much of it. She was too exhausted and caught up in her own food. Now that it’s on her mind, though, it won’t stop bugging her.

Peppermint can’t be completely sure from where she’s sitting at her desk, but it looks like only about half of it is gone.

That part is pretty par for the course. Chai may eat quickly, but he never eats much.

The problem is that it means his stomach doesn’t hurt because he’s hungry. It’s difficult to tell, but she’s pretty sure it’s still bugging him. He looks fine on the surface. There’s an underlying discomfort in his expression and the way he’s lying, though. But maybe she’s just looking for things that aren’t there.

“You good, Chai?” she calls." He hums in response, flipping to the next page of his book.

With a sigh, Peppermint turns away. That’s about as good as she’s gonna get from him.

It’s when they all finally head to bed that the trouble really starts.

Peppermint wakes up to the sound of retching from the bathroom. So does everyone else, from the way Macaron sits up and Korsica makes a sympathetic noise.

CNMN is the first to move. “Mr. Chai, are you alright?” "The only response they get is a groan.

The others stay where they are. Peppermint is unsure what to do.

She has foggy memories of Kale being sick when they were kids, but she never helped out or anything. Mom always took care of it. And whenever she’s sick, she just...takes care of herself.

After a while, CNMN and Chai leave the bathroom. They lead him to the couch, where they help him lie back down.

“I’ll go get a bucket,” Macaron says, before he gets up to do just that.

808 hops up onto Chai, landing on his abdomen. He jolts, quickly picking her up. After taking a deep breath, he shakily sets her down higher up, over his arm’s power unit.

“Next time, throw up in the toilet, please, Mr. Chai,” CNMN says once he’s settled. “You’ll clog up the sink, which would be very bad.”

Peppermint doesn’t even want to think about having to fix and clean that.

“Sorry,” Chai mumbles. “Didn’t think…and then…” “It is alright. You should try to rest.”

When Macaron finally gets back, a small bucket in tow, Chai seems to be asleep.

“Poor little guy,” Macaron says as he places the bucket near the couch. “Hope it was just a one time thing.”

“Me too,” Peppermint whispers.

And, of course, it wasn’t.

Chai throws up about every twenty minutes. Sometimes, he does it in the bucket. Other times, he heads for the bathroom, presumably because it isn’t just vomiting going on.

Each and every time, the others get up to help however they can. They rotate out comforting him. Only CNMN goes with him into the bathroom, though.

Peppermint is never sure what to do. Holding his hand seems to help, though. It hurts her heart seeing him like this. It hurts even more when he mumbles an apology every time.

“Sorry for keeping you up…” “Sorry about this…” Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry.

“Stop apologizing,” she told him at one point. “You don’t need to.” He only murmured another one in response.

It’s exhausting. But Peppermint doesn’t think any of them would be able to sleep through this, anyways.

As the night wears on, the more exhausted and downright awful Chai looks.

At around 4 AM is when he looks his worst.

His hair is a disaster. He’s white as a sheet, his eyes almost looking hollow. And he won’t stop shaking like a leaf.

“Are you cold, Mr. Chai?” CNMN asks as they help him lie down for the thousandth time.

“N-No-No,” he stutters out. He pauses, licks his lips and swallows. “Just…tired.”

“It has been quite some time now since this began. The worst of it should be over. Which means you will be able to get some proper rest!”

Chai laughs. It’s an empty sound.

“That’d be nice.”

He throws up again at 6 AM. 2 hours of peace. 2 hours of sleep.

Peppermint isn’t sure whose turn it is. She decides it’ll just be hers.

That, apparently, was the correct call, because no one else gets up. Not even CNMN, and they don’t really have to sleep. Their exhaustion must’ve finally knocked them out cold.

She sits down on the ground next to him, holding her hand out. After a moment, he shakily takes it with his robotic one. The metal is warm.

At this point, Chai isn’t really throwing up. It’s mostly just dry heaving.

In Peppermint’s experience, that’s far worse than puking.

When he finally stops, it’s quiet for a while. For a moment, she thinks he fell back asleep.

But then he whispers, “Will it be over soon?”

He sounds so small. His voice almost dies halfway through the sentence.

She doesn’t want to lie. Doesn’t want to give him false hope. So Peppermint doesn’t.

“I don’t know. I hope so.”

“Sor—” “Chai.” Silence.

“You don’t have to apologize,” she says with a soft sigh. “You didn’t do anything wrong.”

“Feels like it,” he mutters.

She turns her head to look at him. “What do you mean?”

He stares at her. His eyes gleam faintly in the light cast by the night light they plugged in hours ago. It was better than turning on the lights. Easier to sleep that way.

After a moment, he reaches for a water bottle on the floor. Opening it one-handed, he takes a few sips, before setting it back down. Then he looks at her again.

“I don’t know. I feel like you’re all mad at me.” Peppermint’s brow furrows. “Why would we be mad?” “Because I’m keeping you up,” Chai replies with a shrug. “Not on purpose. Your stomach is all fucked up.” “Yeah…I guess so.”

808 nudges the side of his face. She’s been following him everywhere, never straying from his side. It’s cute. And it’s nice to know that if something happened, at least 808 would be here to wake them all up if Chai can’t.

“You should try and get some sleep,” Peppermint says. “You too,” he says through a yawn. “I will.”

She stays there, holding his hand, even after he drifts off. Eventually, she falls asleep, too. It’s a horrible idea, sleeping on the ground like this—it’ll hurt like a bitch when she wakes up—but she’ll get over it.

Chai has done a lot for her. This is the least she can do for him.

Waking up is painful, just like Peppermint knew it would be.

The good news is that Chai seems to feel better.

They all take the day off to hang out and keep an eye on him. Just in case.

It’s spent watching movies. They watch all of their favorites. And if any of them fall asleep during one, well, it’s not a big deal. They can always just rewind it or rewatch the whole thing.

At one point, Korsica leaves to check on some security things. She comes back with a box of pizza and a gift basket.

“It’s from Roxanne,” she explains as she gives the basket to Chai.

“When was someone gonna tell me that all I had to do to get one of these was get sick?”

Peppermint rolls her eyes at that.

“You don’t have to get sick to have someone send you one. Just…I don’t know…ask.”

“But that’s so awkward!” he whines. “It really isn’t.”

As they eat their pizza and put on some really old movie Chai likes—simply titled ‘Robots’—Peppermint finds she doesn’t mind his joking attitude for once. Maybe it’s because this isn’t some sort of injury that could turn grave fast. Or maybe it’s because she thinks she understands now.

This is another thing Chai tries to do for them. To comfort them. To make them not worry about him. And as annoying as it can be, it does work in its own right.

So if humoring him will help make him feel better, why shouldn’t she?

It’s the least Peppermint can do.

[crewofthegoldrush]

I'm feeling bad that I don't have any new art to share and probably won't for a few weeks, so to make up for it and to give myself a kick in the pants to get working on this, I want to share the full "prologue" for fool's gold 2

I don't usually like to reveal a lot of my works in progress because I really do like the surprise, but I'm okay posting this because everything is going to get a new coat of paint, it features a conversation Ive already drawn, and I'm no where near finished editing. The final print will be longer, new/fixed dialogue (I don't always remember to write Monty with her cowboy accent lmao) and more exposition but for now, I hope you enjoy a draft!

ONE

You tap the floor twice with your tail, your signal that you were finished for today, and let her help you pick yourself off the floor. "If I didn't know better, I'd say you were tryin' to beat me."

Aubrey's lip turns up at the side. "Of course I'm trying to beat you."

You watch her settle against the ship's railing, familiar even on this ship that wasn't yours. You take your place next to her, hyper aware of your petulant body language. You take a swig from your flask, offering it to her after cleaning the spout with a gold glow.

She raises a brow at the metal container, eyeing it wearily, and you manage a grin. "It's just water."

Looking more at ease, she shakes her head anyway, and you let it hang limply in your hand as you fold your arms on the banister.

"Something is bothering you."

You glance at her; Aubrey has mimicked your casual position but her eyes are as intense as they always are as she simply watches you. "It's been months since we started this, Aubrey. Shouldn't I have more than the basics by now? It shouldn't be this hard, should it?"

You were certainly better than where you were when you started. But compared to her, who had picked up firearm training so well that you had very nearly finished her gun by now, you feel indignant at your slow progress.

Aubrey hums. "You don't need to be so hard on yourself. As you've said many times, your heart is not fully in it yet, right? Your magic is improving and there are plenty of regular distractions."

She was right about that - it was hard to truly focus on leisure time when the two of you were still expected to handle your regular duties, now, you suspect, under the watchful eyes of the Tains. Nevermind the fact that, with your ship still seized, you and your team were attending to various matters, both personal and necessary. You yourself had taken up bounty hunting again to keep your coin stock healthy enough, and there were days you didn't see Harper at all.

"Besides," she continues, gesturing for you to hand her your flask, and you do. "Muscle memory is one of the first things you need to train. You are not there yet, but I'm confident that you will."

She tucks your flask away. "You are too stubborn for the case to be anything else."

You grin at her backhanded compliment and the way she just stole what she probably assumed was indeed alcohol from you, something Harper would do for Demetrius. "I can always count on you to humble me, darlin'."

"Just do your homework. Which you haven't been, I've noticed," she adds with a humorous look. 

"Like you said, I've been keepin' busy."

Her gun and silencer were almost finished (as was the one Tequila begged you to make for her), but it wasn't just that - you had taken it upon yourself to keep an eye on almost everyone's business. 

Including hers.

"Speakin' of homework - have you been doin' any of those readin's?"

A few months had passed since Lohn Ender, the professor who studied all things dreams in Koranburg, had written you back to let you know he was not able to accommodate a visit, and that if you wanted more information you would need to come see him in person. A firm 'no,' considering he and the other professors were assuredly not pleased that their object of interest had been seized by another country.

But you had a back up. Arthur Weekes, Breezy's father, was an expert in his field about the planes of your world and beyond. You had reached out to him to ask for any and all reading recommendations on the subject of Dal Quor. He had responded eagerly and sent more than just recommendations but a whole crate of books as well.

Breezy had only been a little weirded out that you were now pen pals with her parents, but otherwise seemed to find the situation delightful.

You had loaded these books up in the library, telling Harper that you had faith in Mr. Weekes to be objective, and that if she wanted to pull on this thread, you would help her.

It was a hard topic to broach for the both of you. You had learned from Harper that the creatures known as the Inspired - the ones that your whole crew had seen in their dreams thanks to the proximity to that crystal - were supposed to be angelic, protecting the country of Riedra, and you firmly believe she genuinely thinks this. But she had also learned that you and your team had witnessed Dal Quor first hand and that there was nothing angelic about it. You have no doubt she believes you, and them - they did not know she was from Riedra, and have no reason to be lying about this.

It was not your place to question her handlers - far be it from you to 'splain to an assassin spy a damn thing about her own country. But the conflicting accounts was intriguing to both of you.

Aubrey leans against the railing, looking out over the docks. "Some. It's certainly strange to read about dreams. But it's familiar. I never used to have them before frequenting Khovaire, so I had to be taught how to correspond in ornoric language."

You turn your head at her sharply, shocked and immediately invested. "You've never had your own dreams?"

You watch her think that over, as if unsure what or how much to tell you. It wasn't unusual for her to speak about her past as Aubrey, but it was certainly rare and she was selectively forthcoming, compared to Harper who seemed to have less issue giving you pieces of her past so long as she was vague about it. "Mostly, no."

Her eyes dart around the deck where you two are quite alone, a motion you probably would not have noticed had you not been so blatantly staring.

Again she hesitates, but then admits, "In my country, we dream what the Inspired wishes, as you saw. They protect us from evil spirits that can take over a dream; to do otherwise is dangerous, unnatural. But I soon learned that…I've realized that this is how everyone's nights are, and that it is normal.

"When I am like this," she continues, gesturing to herself, "I can resist dreaming, should I choose to. It was a bit difficult after I lost that journal, but I still can. But as Harper, when I am with you all - I do dream more and now that I know it is normal…it is harder to resist."

You tilt your head, thinking about how seeing her dream in Dal Quor was how you knew she was alive after the mutiny. "Was it a comfort then? The crystal?"

Aubrey glances at you with a look you can't completely read, but it is pleasant. "I suppose. I find many things a comfort as Harper these days."

You grin. "It must have been buckwild for you when you first had a nightmare."

She gives a bark of a laugh, rolling her eyes. "Don't remind me. Apparently even toddlers dream and I certainly handled it like one, I imagine."

"Tell me about it?"

She rests her chin in her palm. "Like hell."

You burst out laughing. "Fair enough. So tell me this then. If you can choose to resist dreaming as Aubrey, but Harper can't - or doesn't, or however…who do you sleep as?"

It is very rare that you can take her by surprise but you see the question jolt her, her eyebrows raising, body straightening, hands dropping from her chin. Her eyes stare ahead at nothing before falling to her hands against the banister, brow furrowed in thought. You get the feeling she wants to shift. 

"I - "

The question sounded innocent on the surface but you realize the full implications of what you have just asked her to admit. Does she duck her head, pretend her doubts are fantasy, rely on what she knows as Aubrey and resists? Or does she embrace the possibility of what Harper has taught her and allows herself to dream?

Is that something you could ask her to say out loud?

Aubrey does eventually open her mouth to say something but you interrupt her.

"- I also gotta know," you say, leaning over dramatically, practically pressed against her shoulder, "d'you still sleep naked? I think that's a better question, actually."

Again you see the surprise clear on her face before her cheeks turn a touch pink and she snaps an indignant, "For Khyber’s sake, Montgomery."

But her lips turn up just enough, especially as you grin wickedly at her. She pushes your face away. "I'm never living that down am I? You will give me no peace, will you?"

Her fingers pressed against your cheek, you smirk at her. "Maybe if you'd admit it was funny as hell, I'd be inclined to forget it eventually."

Aubrey gives you - not a smile, but she certainly isn't frowning or scolding you. "In your dreams, as they say."

She straightens, pulling her hand away. "Now, if you are finished humbling me, I think I'll get some sleep. And you should as well, yes? You have a Gala to prepare for soon, do you not?"

You beam - how could you forget? "I get the hint. G'night, darlin'. Don't be late for firearms trainin' tomorrow."

"When am I ever?" She leaves you with, before nodding her good night to you and turning away.

Her hair is turning brown when you call out to her. "Hey -?"

She pivots, looking back at you and you see her face is still Aubrey's - she looks pretty damn good with dark hair.

"So - 'man of my dreams' - phrases like that don't mean much where you're from, huh?"

"No," she says simply. "But I can be taught, I'm finding."

With a shift in her stance, your flask sails towards your head with a speed and precision that takes you by surprise; by some miracle, you catch the damn thing an inch before your face.

"As can you. Good night, Sheriff."

You watch her shift to Harper, who gives you a final smile. You give her an admittedly dopey one in return, and as she walks away you think perhaps that was your answer.

You picture her with blonde hair; pretty damn good too.

--

hey look if you don't include obvious foreshadowing is it really a prologue?

Thank you for reading this preview for pure gold! I'm really excited about this one. And I'm just going to apologize now for how very mushy this fic will be, but if you've been following me all this time I have a feeling that will not be a surprise

I'm most excited for the chapter leading up to their date, which features a sort of cat and mouse game between them in a casino that was just as fun to draft as it was to play (watching the other players get actively invested in helping me was a delight I can't express) with a payoff that I still cherish & feel thankful for to this day - and it wasn't even the kiss! I really hope I do it justice

[fxshigurosbae]

KINKTOBER DAY 28: “VIRGIN; Levi”

summary: Captain’s soft side, who wouldn’t want to see it?

✚ pairing: levi x fem reader

✚ warnings: NSFW, unprotected sex, aftercare, virgin, praising, age gap and detailed smut.

Surprisingly, Levi always acted differently towards you, not always giving you attention in public but mostly showing interest and care for you well being, it could have been because you were one of his best soldiers, maybe not, you couldn’t tell exactly why.

He’d never yell at you or complain, not even order you to clean things that weren’t your duty, yet when you turned eighteen, things felt a little different, his gaze towards you changed unconsciously from an innocent feeling to something you were unable to fully describe.

That’s when your relationship with him became to flow to another direction, instead of being a simple “teacher and student” type of thing, it was then a potential love interest kind of thing. Levi would talk to you more in private, spoil you when no one was around, let you get rest when others couldn’t, even if little things, he showed he cared and you in return could only give him a little of your company as well as smiles and blushed cheeks yet, for some reason, he never touched you, not even once.

It was late, a breezy calm night, everyone was exhausted from working all week but you could still keep going, having to finish some of the research and planning you were working on with your best friend Mikasa, since she had already finished her part of it, you let her get some rest.

“Good night, Y/N.”

“Night Mika, see you tomorrow.” She smiled.

“Oh, those are to be handed to Levi.” Your eyes widened a bit.

“Uh, fine, I’ll make sure to do so, thanks.”

About half an hour later, finally making sure everything was done, you got everything and quickly went to his office, only noticing how much you were panting in front of it, taking a step back, fixing your uniform and posture, lowly knocking on the door three times.

“Who is it?” You heard after a few seconds.

“Captain, I’m sorry for coming so late, Mikasa and I have finished our research and need you to review it so it can be put to action, it’s about Marley, sir.”

“Come in,” Your empty hand opened the door , seeing him standing in front of the window with his back facing you. “where’s Mikasa?”

“She already went to sleep, Captain, I was the only one left.”

“Good, you can put those on my table.” You hesitantly walked closer, carefully laying the small pile of papers on the empty center of the wooden desk, lifting your head just to find him standing there right in front of you. “Y/N.”

“Yes, Captain.”

“Do you know why I have never touched you?” He asked that out of nowhere.

“Do I have to answer that?” You confusedly questioned.

“Yes.” His eyes were fixated on you, your head slightly lower than him.

“I don’t know, Captain, could I ask why?”

“Yes, you can do whatever you want, when you’re with me, that’s because I care about you.”

“I appreciate it, I care about your well-being as well, Captain but—

“That’s not what I mean, Y/N, I mean it as something I only feel for you.”

“Captain Levi—

“Levi, I want you to call me that when no one’s around.” Your heart beat fastened, finally realizing what he meant.

“Le, Le, Levi.” You stopped in between words before being able to say his name without the honorific title.

“Good girl.” He was making you shy, feeling your cheeks warm up. As soon as you knew, he was closer than before, standing besides you, while your body still leaned down. “Can I touch you?”

“Yes.” You briefly consented, feeling your breath hitch, having for the first time his fingers against your chin as he lifted your head, turning it slightly to the side, your eyes meeting his once again.

“You’re so pretty, Y/N.” Unable to say anything about it, both of you leisurely and carefully began leaning closer to each other, your faces being only a few inches apart, you glanced at his eyes which were fixated on your lips, feeling your eyelids closing, unexpectedly having your lips against Levi’s.

You were so pure, none of those things actually were of your interest, you longed for connection, even though you knew about the things people’d do, since hearing your mates every other night, you couldn’t find the person, until…

His lips were soft, pressing against yours with such ease and passion, his fingers still slightly pressing against your chin, feeling them move towards your neck and jawline to the side of your face, grabbing onto some of your hair.

Levi began pulling away and you tried to follow him, not wishing to distance yourselves, hearing a low chuckle from him.

“That, was my first kiss.” You whispered, hoping he wouldn’t hear it.

“Ever?” Your head lifted a little to stare back at his eyes, having yourself nod at his question, a light smile appearing on the corner of his lips. “Do you regret it?”

“I want to do it again.” Shamelessly replying, Levi liked your answer, having him lean once again a little faster, your lips attached a bit harsher this time yet you liked it, a lot.

Levi’s unoccupied hand suddenly pressed against your waist, sending shivers down your spine, specially after having him pull your body closer, both your chests touching, even if clothed, you could feel his warm body, it was something new and definitely amazing, making you also gasp.

Noticing, he took advantage of that to slightly enter his tongue inside your mouth, you panicked a little but then relaxed, enjoying the sensation and following his movements, you were a quick learner.

His head turned a little to the side, pulling your head even closer with his hand, his touch was so warm and soothing, you could feel your heart pounding, it was as if it’d explode.

Hearing low smacking noises from your lips, you were getting the hang of it and it was even better, becoming hard to breath, he noticed and pulled away along with you, breathlessly grinning uncontrollably.

“Levi.” His eyes shined at you calling him only by the name, but before you could even say what you wanted, he kissed you, grabbing your waist and lifting your body, you instinctively wrapped your legs around him, it was as if he knew what you was about to ask.

He got out of his office as quietly as possible, only struggling a little to walk straight, thankfully his room was a few doors away, you knew he was taking you there, only noticing after you were laid on his bed, pulling away for the first time.

“Levi.” You called again.

“Yes, darling?” Your body warmed even more after hearing the nickname.

“Levi, I want you.” The words weren’t forming properly in your head, there was nothing else you could have said that’d express your feelings properly.

“That way I can’t say no,” His fingers caressed your cheeks, staring so calmly at you, he didn’t seem like himself at all. “you’re a virgin, aren’t you?” Once again, your head nodded. “Are you sure you won’t regret it?”

“Levi, I want you, only you, please.” Your voice melted his heart, it was like an enchantment.

“I’ll be gentle.” He reassured, suddenly kissing your neck, leaving gentle pecks on it as you closed your eyes and slightly threw your head back, feeling him slowly remove your clothes, you shivered uncontrollably, anxious and scared for what was about to happen however, you never thought you wanted it so badly, only then you realized what Levi meant to you.

Only a few moments later you noticed you were completely vulnerable to him, Levi only wore his pants, exposing his defined abs and scars, touching his unexpectedly smooth skin while he still kissed your entire neck, cheeks and shoulders, also lowering himself closer to you, feeling another person’s body against yours was indescribable, hot skins, bare chests, your erect nipples pressed against that wider body, making you bit your lip and let out a sudden low and short moan.

“That’s so cute.” You heard him mumble, it was embarrassing but you liked the compliment. Your inexperienced hands hesitantly moved towards his hips, having Levi stop kissing you for a second.

“Levi, take it off.” Those words which you spontaneously chose messed with his head in a way you couldn’t understand, he immediately obeyed, seating straight, staring at your eyes, his lips were red from so much friction against your skin, you saw how hard and big he was, actually way bigger than you’d ever imagine.

“So beautiful, darling.” He called you that again, leading you to cover your lips with your forearm in shyness, you didn’t want him to see your reaction. “Why are you hiding from me?” Levi pulled your arm away softly, as well as your other hand which tried covering your breasts. “I’m not going to hurt you.”

“Levi, if we do this, are you going to pretend it never happened?”

“I won’t, I don’t care about anything other than you, don’t you trust me?”

“I’ve always trusted you.”

“Fuck, you’re doing it again,” He replied, completely hypnotized by you, having him kiss you once more as you made out even more passionately. Levi’s hand traveled from your waist to lower belly, he carefully spread your legs apart and went to one of your thighs, his fingers came in contact with your sensitive spot earlier than you expected, gasping.

Levi began circling your clit and wet area, you have never touched yourself and having someone else do it for the first time and with such experience was amazing. Your back was arching unconsciously and his pace fastened just a tiny bit, making you struggle a little to kiss him back, your hands cupped his jawline, messing with the back of his hair.

“Is it good when I touch you here?” He spoke in between kisses.

“Hm, yeah, really good.”

The feeling just got better at each second, your wishes to moan became more intense yet you contained yourself, Levi then stopped and slowly moved towards somewhere else, only feeling him enter two fingers inside you so carefully yet it was a weird type of feeling, making you struggle even more to kiss back.

Your legs were trying to squish together but his body didn’t let you. Those fingers went further, feeling them curl a little with effort, pulling out and going in at the same slow pace but not too deep inside, your breathing heaving and completely unable to continue making out, which made Levi pull away.

“I’ll start, tell me if it hurts or if you want me to stop, alright?” You nodded as he then aligned himself with your entrance, you gripped onto his arms and he supported himself besides you, finally thrusting the very tip in, one side of your face scrunching a little, he was focused, moving so slowly to make sure not to hurt you. As he went in, glancing at you, suddenly feeling a sharp pain you groaned, biting your lip. “Does it hurt?”

“A little, yeah,” You replied, your grip tightening on his arms. “keep going.” Going further in, your back gradually arching and head thrown back, it hurt a lot but you assured him it was alright.

“Y/N, I’ll pull out.” He was worried, seeing your eyebrows furrowing together and your nails dig on his skin.

“D-Don’t, keep going, slowly.” Levi obeyed, doing the absolute most to not make the pain increase. You just suddenly felt something dripping onto your leg but the pain was becoming less intense as he thrusted more. He noticed you bled and wasn’t fazed by it, he knew it was normal and how your expression was changing. Feeling him stop, he was in, letting you have some time to adjust.

“Are you alright?” He asked worried.

“The pain’s fading away.” Your body relaxed as you got used to it. “Go slowly, please.”

“Of course, darling.” He pecked your lips, supporting himself on his elbows beside your head, faces inches apart and as soon as he went back, you snook your arms and wrapped them around his shoulders, gasping. Levi thrusted in again calmly, seeing your eyes twitch a little, going back and then in for the third time, moving with care. “Just relax, I’ll make you feel good.”

Your body unclenched, letting yourself all for him to take care of, the pain fading away almost instantly after a few thrusts, a sudden pleasure emerging, your mouth opening as you accidentally let out a moan, Levi’s eyes feeding from it, he looked amazed and in a trance, not looking away, making eye contact with you since the very beginning.

“Levi, faster.” His hips immediately got the order, speeding bit by bit, making sure you were enjoying and not feeling pain. Your nails now digging on his muscular back, your legs wrapping around his moving waist. “Levi.” You repeated his name, driving that man insane as your moans escaped.

The pleasure that you felt was getting better at each thrust, it was such a loving, passionate, intimate pace, the connection between you both only increasing. Your whines were getting more frequent but you were still insecure, cutting them off in the middle.

“I want to hear you, darling, there’s no need to be shy.” He assured, whispering and not caring if someone could hear both of you, they probably were deep in their sleep anyway plus he is fucking Levi Ackerman, no one would dare to complain about anything to his face.

“Levi.” That was the only thing you could say, your chests touching like before, teasing you more. He groaned lowly, it was so seductive, your heart twitched at each one of it.

He was still going slow and carefully yet it wasn’t necessary to go wild, it’s supposed to be a bonding and that’s how it was going, he was falling even deeper in love and so were you. Your whines were somewhat desperate and short, moaning repeatedly, not knowing when to stop, it just felt too good.

“L-Levi, I’m, I think I’m…” You couldn’t describe it yet he knew, he didn’t expect you to last too long, in fact, he had never felt like coming so early and you noticed his pace becoming sloppier. “Do it i-inside of me, please!” You moaned.

He was thrusting slower, your eyes closed as you let out a loud whine as your legs shook desperately, squirting for the first time ever, an orgasm in which you never thought would feel this good, holding Levi on your arms as he also did the same, thrusting one last time a bit harsher and having him fulfill your insides with a warm liquid, love juices, you thought to yourself.

Finally coming down from both of your highs, Levi pulled out, some liquid still dripping out of you, both breathing heavily and sweating a little. His eyes still looking at you with the same shine as before, his cheeks blushed, it was cute.

He grabbed a towel that was laying on the end of the bed and cleaned you, it was unexpected yet it made your heart pound more, admiring him and all his features, also how focused he was, wiping his sweat off as well, when done he threw that towel on the floor.

Collapsing besides you, strugglingly wrapping yourself around him, your head buried on his neck, covering yourselves with the clean parts of the sheets, his arms were all over you as he caressed your skin and head, messing with your hair, kissing your hand, enjoying the opportunity to finally touch the wonderful woman of his dreams.

“I love you, Y/N.” He blurted out, you never thought he’d confess that to you.

“I love you Levi.” Finally, words that could describe your feelings for him.

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[highdramas]

the billboard said the end is near | b.b.

𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐥𝐝'𝐬 𝐚 𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐥𝐞 𝐛𝐥𝐮𝐫𝐫𝐲 𝐮𝐧𝐢𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐞 | 𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭

pairing: bucky barnes x fem!reader

warnings: language, possible tfatws spoilers, canon typical violence, bucky is soft and loves his doll and will do anything to keep her safe

word count: 2184

summary: bucky is protective over what has given him solace.

note: here's tawlb part 4! you don’t have to read these in order, they stand independently, but they do all work together! PLEASE leave feedback/reblog! this is extremely helpful for me writing future parts to know what everyone likes or doesn’t like!

enjoy! <3

chaos has always controlled your life.

in all of the best ways, and all of the worst ones, too. in the best ways, it has allowed you to not take life too seriously. it has allowed you to let things roll off your shoulders and keep your easy breezy demeanor. you like to think that you don’t allow the little things to affect you-- you also note that it’s because the big things have been so all consuming.

who knew that turning to dust for five years would turn your life into such a shit show?

the five years hadn’t felt like five years to you at all. it felt like one day, you had been laying on your couch watching tv, and then five years later you were appearing in someone else’s apartment. all of your things, gone.

you will never forget their screams as they watched you materialize from nothing.

of course, you can’t blame them. and it wasn’t just this apartment. the screams and the chaos broke through the entire building. people busting from doors, crying and scrambling to use their cell phones, to see if this was really happening.

the couple that had moved into your apartment after you dusted had been kind, all things considered. the woman had held you and you could feel her crying and she kept saying do you have family? do you know their numbers?

finally, you couldn’t help yourself. you had asked, “what happened to me?”

“you’ve been gone for five years, honey.”

these sorts of revelations had ruled your life for the months since you came back.

like when you called your boyfriend only to find out that he was engaged.

like when you found out that you certainly didn’t have a job anymore.

like when you found out that you had no apartment, no savings, no anything. nothing left.

it has been over a year since the blip and you are still feeling the repercussions from it. you are still feeling the hurt of having your life upended, you are still feeling the hurt of missing a life that went on without you. it’s hard not to daydream about what could’ve been. what could’ve stayed the same.

then bucky looks at you, and you’re reminded that not all change is bad.

change is hard but you know that he kisses you and it makes your brain fuzzy, he lays you back on your mattress and he stays with you until the sun rises. change is hard but you introduce him as my boyfriend, james to every new person you meet and you watch as he smiles and pride lingers in his eyes and he carefully places his arm around your shoulders. change is hard but he doesn’t wear the gloves around you anymore.

change is hard, but bucky is better than any of it.

he’s been gone more than normal lately.

of course, you understand. and, really, you think it might be good for him. not the fighting-- while you understand the benefit it has for him, the purpose that it gives him, that’s not the thing that you believe serves him best. no, it is sam. it is sam’s family. it is knowing that there are other people out there in the world who are looking at him the same way that you look at him.

okay, maybe not exactly the same.

bucky had sent you a text from that stupid dinky flip phone that morning, saying that he would be home that night. the implications go unsaid.

you and the winter soldier have formed quite the routine-- he has a key to your apartment on his keyring (it’s a disney princess key. it’s the only spare that you had, and the laughter that erupted from you had made him relent in trying to barter for the cat printed key you have). he’s going to let himself in, probably around ten. you’ll already have the chinese takeout spread out on the table. you’ll spread your arms out and do little jazz hands towards the food and you’ll say, “ta-da.”

and you will watch as the tension in his shoulders starts to ease and he sets his duffel bag down in your entryway and he will cross the room to you. his arms will snake around your waist and his face will be buried into the crook of your neck. he will sigh and you will stroke his hair and you will say, “welcome home, buck.”

but now, it is nine. it is nine and you are curled up on your couch and kitty rests in your lap and you feel yourself growing antsy waiting for bucky to come home. she looks up at you and lets out that little trill as you scratch her head and you smile.

the smiling doesn’t last long.

the building that you and bucky live in is not swanky by any means. it was built in the 40s, with creaky floors and ugly carpeted hallways. the walls are thin and you can hear everything-- really, everything. and the shouting and commotion is certainly not typical.

you move to stand just as the door bursts--or explodes, you’re not sure which is the better word-- open. a scream leaves your lips and you hold onto your cat for dear life, scrambling back into your bedroom and clicking the door behind you. your limbs are shaking and you nearly trip over your dresser and your cat nearly claws your arm off.

you hear bucky before you see him.

“you really think i wasn’t gonna find out about this little stunt?” you’ve never heard his voice like this-- so low, so full of absolute rage. “you’re out of your fucking mind.”

the other person is stammering and though you don’t see the blow that bucky lands on their face, you do hear the aftermath. bucky is talking to someone and you finally set your cat down and you hear bucky on the other side of the door. “doll, it’s me.”

you open the door and look at him with a pounding heart and shaking hands. he looks just as shaken, but more than that-- he’s angry. his fists are clenched at his sides. “buck--” you lay a hand on your chest and you try to gain control of your breathing and you can see that he is doing the same. “what happened?”

bucky hesitates. you watch the gears turning in his head, and it makes your head tilt to the side. “bucky, i’m not kidding-- tell me.”

“we were on our way back and sam got a tip from torres that the flag smashers were--” he cringes even at the thought and he shakes his head. “they were going to try and--”

you watch as he struggles to say it, to really say it, and you touch his face. the touch seems to open him up. his hand takes your wrist and he rubs his thumb along the bone. “they wanted to take you as a hostage.”

a hostage.

bucky opens his mouth to say something else as you blink, trying to wrap your mind around the fact that someone wanted to take you as a hostage, but sam interrupts him. “sharon’s got the guy in cuffs downstairs,” he says in your doorway. when you look, you can see that a mess has been made of your living room-- and not the sort of mess that you create. no, it is a mess of destruction and chaos. “i’m gonna head out. call me if you need anything, i’m staying in town.”

bucky nods and you muster up your best smile to sam and then you look at bucky and you say quietly, “can we go to your apartment?”

he nods and you scoop up kitty and you pad down the hall beside him, still in your loungewear and fuzzy socks. you notice that he constantly keeps a hand on you. whether it’s his fingers tangling with yours or his arm around your shoulders or his palm pressed into the small of your back-- you know exactly what it is that he’s doing, and you lean into every touch, hoping that the contact whispers i’m here, i’m here, i’m here, and you are not losing me.

kitty drops to the floor and, surprisingly, it’s bucky that speaks before you do. “you’re gonna move in here. with me.” he stares at you firmly. “i’m gonna make sure that you’re safe. and the safest place you can be is with me.”

you open your mouth to reply but he continues. “i can’t--” you watch the gears in his head turning, the scenarios turning over and over and over again in his mind. “i can’t lose you.”

“buck…” you move over to him and you place your hands on his face. his eyes are fixed on the wall behind your head, and you watch as guilt overcomes him and you can practically hear him saying if i hadn’t been there in time… “bucky, you’re not going to.”

you feel his hands fist into the material of your t shirt and he holds you even closer. “i’ll move in with you,” you finally whisper against the stubble of his jaw. “and not just for safety. because i want to live with you.”

bucky pulls away and he looks at you with a wobbling lip and you shush him. “i’m okay,” you whisper and you lean your forehead on his. “i’m okay, and i’m here, and i’m staying.”

“okay.”

his hand caresses the back of your head and you touch the place where his heart is. you watch his shoulders rise and fall, you watch his eyes flutter shut and you see some of the tension finally seep out of his pores. he opens his eyes at you and he looks so tired.

“i sleep on the floor,” he blurts it as he pulls away slightly. for a moment, it looks like he regrets it, the way that he winces slightly. “i don’t like… i don’t like sleeping in the bed. it’s too… soft. i always slept in your bed when i stayed over because i didn’t want you to wake up and i wasn’t there.”

“bucky…” you lean into every single place that he touches. “i’ll sleep on the floor with you.”

an incredulous sort of laugh leaves bucky as he stares down at you. he shakes his head a bit. “i don’t want you to do that.”

“i don’t care,” you say with a steely resolve and confident defiance, jutting your chin up at him. “because i’m sleeping next to you. tonight, and every night after. i don’t care where. i’ll never care where.”

bucky’s exhale is shaky and broad arms encircle your waist entirely, drawing you in closer and closer. his face presses into your neck, the exact way that you had imagined him coming home to you hours earlier. you can feel his lips pressing into your skin, can feel the sheer need in it. “i don’t deserve you,” every movement of his lips against your neck is entirely felt, sending sparks through your limbs. “i don’t know what i did to get this lucky.”

“shh,” you rake your fingernails down his scalp and you can feel his fingers gripping you tighter. “if you say that stupid shit again, i’ll kill you. you deserve me.” you tap his chin and he fixes his gaze on you. “and i deserve you. we deserve each other. we deserve to be happy. together. and i’m tired of people thinking otherwise.”

bucky finally cracks a smile. “you’re very stubborn.”

“i thought you liked that about me.”

“i love that about you.” he takes a beat. “among other things.”

you bite down on your lip and finally lean up on your tiptoes. “i promise i’ll be a good roommate.”

“that’s bullshit,” he says and his hands find the curve of your waist once more, traveling to your hips. “i’m going to be cleaning up after you every damn day.”

“yeah, probably.” your hand goes to the back of his head. “it will feel safe. staying here.”

bucky’s nose trails up the side of your face. “good.” he presses his lips to your jaw. “i’m sorry about your apartment. that fucker would’ve been dead if you weren’t there.” he grows more serious again. “i would never let anyone get away with anything like that. i will never let it get that far again, doll. i swear to god.”

“bucky,” you breathe. “i know. it’s okay.” you take his hand and you pull a few blankets off his couch, toss down a few pillows. “let’s go to sleep.”

there’s a twinkle in his eye as he watches you shuffle around his apartment, putting together a makeshift bed on the floor. you fluff the pillows before setting them down and you give him a smile that tells him everything is going to be alright.

even though he says you moving in is about keeping you safe… he sleeps that night on the hardwood, holding you, and he feels safer too.

[ticklishtimothee]

start of something new (bo burnham x reader)

summary: bo and the reader are just friends, but when he takes them out to dinner before his tour is going to take off, that just might change.

a/n: based on a prompt from @deborahmessingsfingers who wanted a fic about having a first kiss with bo!! the plot sort of just came to me and i also wrote this at like two o’clock in the morning.

words: 1,100

You and Bo are friends. Good friends, and have been for a few months now. But lately you’ve been thinking, wanting more.

You went to see his show last night, always excited to be a supportive, familiar face in the crowd. Now, he’s taking you out to dinner while he’s in town, claiming he didn’t want to miss out on spending time with you before his tour really kicks off.

The thought of him being states away doesn’t appeal to you very much, but hey, it’s all part of his job. It sucks to think that you’ll have to go without his hugs, the scent of his cologne, or having Bruce snuggle up to your lap when you visit.

But that’s in a few days, and you can’t dwell on it now, not when he’s sitting across from you at the table, the sleeves of his sweater pushed up to his elbows, his glasses balanced on his nose as he scans the menu.

“The show went really well,” you say, wanting to break the silence.

His head perks up like a puppy hearing its name. “Yeah, I think it went alright. Do you think they could tell that I was nervous?” he asks.

You shake your head. “If you hadn’t told me, I’d have no idea.”

He lets out a little sigh of relief. “Thanks for coming tonight. To the show, obviously, but also, you know, to dinner.”

You smile. His eyes are fixed down at the menu again, although he doesn’t seem to be reading it. You assume that it’s post-show nerves and figure it’d be best to not point it out, and just let him work through it on his own.

While the two of you are pretty open with one another, anxiety is still something he’s working on. You don’t want to push him to talk about something he’s not comfortable discussing, especially on a night where you’re supposed to be celebrating.

The waitress comes around and takes down your orders. The restaurant is a regular spot for the two of you, and Bo orders the same thing he usually does.

When you tease him about it, he makes a joke about needing some consistency, since he’ll be in a different state every week soon enough.

The reminder that he’ll be gone drops your gaze to the tablecloth, giving a half-hearted chuckle at his comment.

“Hey,” he says, reaching across the table to nudge you gently. “What’s the long face for, hm?”

You look up, but avoid looking in his eyes. “I’m just gonna miss you, I guess.”

Bo’s cheeks color, although it’s barely noticeable in the restaurant’s dim light. He runs a hand through his hair. “I was actually thinking…”

But before he can finish telling you whatever he’s been thinking, the waitress returns with your food. The interaction makes Bo’s words slip your mind, and he appears to have forgotten, too.

You eat, bantering and chatting about the show, the upcoming tour, as well as your life and plans, too. He asks about work, your family. He scolds you for never taking time off.

You have to scoff at that, because it’s hypocritical of Bo to accuse anyone of working too hard. He’s always writing, rehearsing, and recording. 

By the time you’ve finished eating, both too stuffed for dessert, you’ve almost forgotten that this is the last time you’ll be together for some time. But the wicked reminder still lingers in the back of your mind, and while it should make you savor the memories, it only causes sadness to wilt the edges of happy moments.

Bo insists on paying the check, despite your protests, and then offers to walk you home.

Sure, you could call an Uher, but both of you live close enough to the restaurant, and thankfully, you wore comfortable shoes. The evening is cool and breezy, but warm enough for a pleasant stroll.

Bo’s long legs fight to keep at your pace, and the closer you get to your apartment, the more you feel the urge to break through the small talk and tell him how much you’re going to miss him, but the words keep dying on your tongue.

You and Bo have never been overly emotional with one another. Sure, you hugged, and talked about deep shit, but there was always an unspoken tension that held you back from platonic ‘I-love-yous’ and allowing those hugs to linger.

You’re in front of the apartment building when you finally work up the courage, but before you can say anything, Bo is touching your hand.

“I know that this is horrible timing,” he starts. “But I couldn’t leave without doing this.”

And he leans in, having to bend his knees to press your lips together properly. The kiss takes you off guard for only a moment before you’re kissing back, wrapping your arms around his neck and melting into his touch, the smell of his cologne, the taste of his beer lingering on his lips.

And fuck, you hadn’t realized how badly you wanted this until he made the first move. It just feels right, standing there, with him. His lips on yours.

He’s reluctant to pull away, but he does so after a moment, his cheeks flushed and glasses a little lopsided. You reach up to fix them with a little laugh, and he chuckles, too.

“I told you it was bad timing,” he says.

“It is,” you agree. “But I’m not upset about it. In fact, I’m glad.”

He seems relieved. “I just…I couldn’t risk going on tour and being away, and, and the possibility of you meeting someone new, someone better while I was gone.”

“There’s no one better than you,” you reply, reaching up to place a hand on his cheek.

His skin is warm to the touch, and he leans into your palm like it’s the only thing keeping him grounded. “Careful; you don’t want to feed my ego,” he warns, a smile playing on his lips.

You giggle. “Yeah, I guess not. But I mean it.”

Bo touches your waist gently, coaxing you closer to him. “You could always come visit,” he says.

You nod. “I would love to.”

“Really?”

“Yeah. You’ll have to keep me posted on when you have days free, and I can take time off of work—”

“Finally,” Bo mutters, making you grin.

“And we’ll make it work,” you finish, gazing into his eyes.

“That sounds like a pretty good plan to me,” he says.

Then, he kisses you again, and it feels less like a goodbye, and more like a beginning.

[dreamsclock]

Dadza and techno being protective of dream and thinking that he's not strong enough to deal with shit™ but dream casually doing terrifying shit™ and putting himself in danger because that's all he had known, no one had been there to ever tell him to take care of yourself, not push himself to his limits. Dream getting hurt but ignoring his injuries because that's normal. (and he thinks he deserves it. Maybe he's careless intentionally)

this was sad :( c!dream my beloved ,, you deserve the world ,, it’s pretty short, but still ok i think !! :]

warnings: self harm/injury (letting mobs attack him + jumping in front of a creeper to save someone), unhealthy coping mechanisms, blood, injuries, wounds

“What happened this time?” Techno asks. It’s a rhetorical question by now.

Dream doesn’t even blink. “Mobs attacked me,” he says, voice quiet, “I didn’t- My sword broke.”

Techno doesn’t mention that he knows Dream doesn’t carry weapons anymore despite telling everyone he does. It doesn’t mean he likes being lied to; eyes narrowing, he stays silent, focusing on checking over Dream’s bloodied knuckles and bruised ribs for any permanent damage caused.

None that he can see. With a relieved feeling leeching the tension from his shoulders, he tosses Dream a golden apple, which he catches, easily, and frowns. “You should be more careful. People are lurking about here, you know. If they catch you here...”

“I know.” Dream doesn’t look at him, already on his feet. Techno watches him stumble, just a little woozily, before managing to steady himself with a grimace. Disapproval nags at him, but he stifles it - what good will it do? “Thanks, Tech. So I’ll-”

Techno opens the door and comes face to face with a creeper. He barely has time to react before several things happen at once: an explosion, a lightning fast blur of green and blonde hair, and a stifled shriek of pain.

When his vision clears, he and Dream are both lying on the floor. He’s taken half a heart of damage, probably just from the fall: Dream; unarmoured, defenseless Dream, Dream who had pushed Techno out of the way to save him from the creeper, must be on half health at most. 

“Dream?”

Dream’s face is white, but he’s on his feet before he speaks, staggering, propping himself up against a wall. And sure, Techno is a survivor - he and Dream both are - but he can only get to his feet and watch in growing dread as Dream forces himself to check the surrounding areas for any more creepers, fix the dirt the creeper had displaced, and laugh, like he isn’t bleeding and bruised and probably walking with a broken rib.

“Didn’t mean to shove you like that, whoops,” his friend says, through the pain he must be in, “anyway, I have to go meet-”

“Dream, you’re literally-” Techno takes his arm, not unkindly, and tugs him back to the chair he’d been sitting in before. “Jeez, okay, look, you’re injured, and I just fixed you up. I’m not having you die halfway from here and undo all my hard work again,”

Dream looks at him, bemused. “I’m okay,” he says, like it’s obvious, “look, you’ve already wasted a golden apple when I didn’t need it: I don’t need another one now because I was stupid enough to get hurt. It’s not like I’m dying.”

Techno squints. “And not dying constitutes being okay, in your book?”

“Yup.” It’s breezy, genuine: Techno has to stop himself from physically reacting. Instead, he drums his fingers against his thigh, studying Dream, before pulling two health potions out of his inventory and giving them to his friend.

“Drink.”

“What- Techno, I just said-”

“I know, yeah, you’re fine, I heard what you said,” Techno agrees, “but I’m telling you I don’t believe you, so-”

“Techno, I’m fine.” And Dream’s on his feet again, frustration lining his face. Techno gets the feeling he’s said the wrong thing. “Listen, I don’t care if you don’t believe me. I don’t need to do anything you say: I’m fine, I’m on three hearts, I’ll eat on the way and regain health, it’s whatever. I have to go.”

He’s gone before Techno can even call after him, dropping the health potions on to the nearby table. Techno moves to the window, uneasily watching Dream disappear into the forest with only a slight wobble in his gait to show his weakness.

Not for the first time, he curses the manhunts Dream had grown up on. 

...For the first time, Techno decides he’s going to teach his friend how to live instead of survive. 

(It’s what Phil taught him best.)

[vixenpen]

Just Relax For Me, OK? (Scumbag! Hawks x (f) Reader)

(Hoevember Day 10 Free Day)

(Trigger warnings: coercion, power dynamics, manipulation)

(Art by: @kadeart)

He requested me specifically. Not ‘his people’ or his management; Hawks requested me out of all the candidates.

The very thought had you shook. You had only answered the ad seeking ‘new talent’ on a total whim not expecting to get it. Yes, You were cute in your opinion, but you didn’t think you were exceptional or exceptionally lucky enough to get the call back. Yet the email lingered at the back of your mind.

Y/n-San, I hope this email finds you well (although I guess the email doesn’t have a choice, now does it? 😂)

I was impressed with your headshots, and I think you would be perfect for the shoot. If interested respond as soon as possible.

Best,

Hawks

The man had sent you a personal email. He had invited you to be his leading lady himself. You nearly fainted when you got the email. Needless to say after an hour of research to ensure it wasn’t a joke or a scam you promptly emailed back to accept.

That was what led you here: Room 1 on the tenth floor. You were about to have a Photoshoot with the number two hero.

It felt surreal when you finally knocked on the door, but you sobered you quickly when a deep, playful voice sang back: “Come innn.”

A pair of lazy golden eyes sparkled at you as you entered. His deep red wings flexed as he gave a slow, smile.

“Hey there, kid.” He stood.

Your eyes widened. You had never seen him in civilian clothes. He had a little bit more muscle on him than you realized. He was by no means a big man, but he was fit and toned. Lithe muscles flexed beneath his Brooks Brother’s button down shirt, and his large hands were stuffed into his khaki trousers.

You were so taken aback by his casual appearance that you didn’t even notice the way his amber gaze caressed your curves, slowly and appreciatively.

“Enjoying the scenery?” He asked, laughter lacing his tone. “I know I sure am.”

The comment snapped you out of your trance.

“Oh! Gosh I’m sorry. I’ve just never seen you outside of your hero costume much, it’s...different. I mean you look amazing! You always do but—“

Shut up, y/n, just shut the fuck up.

So you snapped your mouth shut while the blonde man threw his head back and laughed. He gave you the sexiest smise (smile eyes) you’d ever had the pleasure of being on the receiving end of. Then He stepped closer, closing the space between you two.

“Well, I’m glad my leading lady approves.” He hummed.

Get your thoughts together, girl.

“Of course. But I was wondering, where is everyone else?”

“Well considering I set up this little meeting two days ahead of time I’m going to assume they’re all at their respective houses.”

“Two days?! Wait so the shoot—“

“Is two days from now. Ain’t I little shit?” He laughed. It was a bright, full sound that made the corner of his eyes crinkle, and despite your own confusion, you couldn’t help, but chuckle too.

“I would say; a lovable scamp,” you joked. “But, why would you ask me to come if it was just going to be the two of us.?“

The blonde fought against a smirk. It was cute how naive you were. It was a good thing Hawks had scooped your fine ass up out of the pile of headshots. Clearly, you were going to need his guidance.

“To help ease your mind a little, y/n. You’re new to all this, right?” He gestured around the studio.

“Uhh, yeah, I am.”

“I can’t imagine shooting an ad with a pro hero as your first job is easy on your nerves.” He gave you a little pouty little smile. Jesus this man was pretty.

You giggled nervously. “The number two pro in Japan at that, sir.”

“Eh,” he gave a dismissive little wave. “Whose counting?” Then he reached out to give your arms a gentle squeeze, his eyes pierced yours, fixing you in place, and you gasped a bit. It wasn’t a predatory look, but it was intense and demanding of your full attention.

“The important thing, kid, is that you’re comfortable with me. Understand?”

Flabbergasted, you nodded. It seemed to appease the avian hero because his serious expression melted into a friendly smile.

“Good, besides, I don’t bite...unless you ask me to, that is.” He added in a low voice.

Despite the friendliness in his face, something about the comment made your sex heat up for just a moment. But you didn’t have time to dawdle on that, before Hawks led you to one of the red couches in the room.

“Come on, let’s chat. I just wanna see where your head is at, Little Birdie, make sure you can really handle yourself in front of a camera.”

Your heart hammered at the nick name. “That’s sweet of you, I appreciate it.”

Hawks smiled. “So did you always wanna be a model?”

“No. I wanted to be a university student, but school is expensive and...well...money is hard to keep with the way things cost now a days.” You explained with a shrug. “But Jesus, I’m so excited! I can’t believe I’m getting to meet my idol,” you gushed, “I’ve seriously been a fan of you forever, and—oh, I’m gushing, aren’t I?” You frowned. “I’m so sorry.”

The blonde just chuckled, propping an arm up on the couch around you.

“It’s alright, y/n, I picked you out of all the other girls that entered.” He cocked a brow in a cheeky little smirk. “You could say I’m a fan of you too.” He placed his free hand on your knee and gave it a squeeze. “You’re gonna be amazing at this.” His fingers trailed up your thigh a bit before stopping.

Your wings gave an involuntary twitch at his praise.

“And those,” he nodded towards the appendages, “are going to photograph beautifully.”

“I don’t know about all that,” you shrugged, laughing a little, “but I’m gonna try my best.”

“Uh Uh,” he gave your knee a little shove, “you’re going to be the best. Here, stand up,”

Puzzled, you looked at his outstretched hand before grabbing it. He pulled you to your feet. You heart revved as he pulled you flush against his chest, and kept an arm wrapped around your waist.

“I’m gonna show you what I see when I look at you, y/n, and what the camera is gonna see as well. Are you wearing anything underneath this?” He asked.

“Excuse me?” Your cheeks burned. “Why?!”

He gave you an amused look as if you’d asked something ridiculous.

“Because, this is going to be a lingerie shoot, and I don’t want to make you uncomfortable if you’re naked under this.”

“Oh...I—yes I am.”

Of course you knew this shoot called for lingerie. The shoot had specified ‘intimate.’ Why were you so shocked?

Quit being such a head case in front of him!

“Take off your clothes, Little Birdie.” He directed.

You paused.

Hawks must have sensed your hesitation because he let out another breezy laugh and added: “if it makes you feel any better, I’ll do the same, look.”

Once again that arresting look of his held you hostage. He kept his hooded eyes on you as he unbuttoned his shirt, slowly slipping it off. He was definitely more muscular than you had originally realized.

Your eyes slid down to where his hands had begun unfastening his belt. It clanked as it collapsed to the ground. He didn’t take off his pants fully, but they now sat low on his trim hips exposing a dark blonde happy trail, and a v-cut that disappeared into a pair of red boxer briefs.

The avian licked his lips. There was a cocky gleam in his eye as he watched you drink in his body shamelessly.

“Your turn, Little Birdie.” He coaxed.

Well, if Hawks could do it, you could too, right?

So you eased out of your tank top and slipped off your jeans, exposing your barely covered flesh in the strappy black and red silk lingerie.

Hawks let out a satisfied; “Mmm,” as his eyes swept over you. “Perfect. Come on, let me show you something.”

He led you to the white backdrop surrounded by studio lights and camera; guiding you to stand on a black X directly in front of a camera.

He sidled you behind you, keeping his strong arms around your waist, then he gently folded your body forward.

Oh...this is...what is this?

As you struggled to formulate coherent thoughts, you felt the man’s soft lips against your ear. There was amusement in his voice as he mumbled: “I feel that heart of yours going a mile a minute, baby bird,” he chuckled. “Relax mama. I got you, ok?”

Your eyes fluttered shut as his low, soothing voice rolled down your spine. You slowed your breathing.

“I know it’s nerve wracking, baby bird,” he hummed in your ear. “Imma take care of you, though, ok?”

His hands were warm and rough and sliding along your supple skin. He pulled your hips towards his, grinding you into his crotch. Your wings twitched involuntarily. Hawks sighed

“Shit,” you whispered, as your ass pressed into his groin.

He felt so good. So strong and self assured.

“That’s it, Angel.” He practically purred. “Just relax, babe. I wanted you for this,” his fingers trailed up your stomach. From the corner of your eye, you see his red wings wrap around you.

His lips were pressing into your neck now.

“You’re so beautiful. If you‘re not feeling your sexy self by the time we shoot tomorrow I’m gonna make you feel it.”

His fingers were caressing the undersides of your breasts now, teasing at their softness.

“Hawks,” you gulped, “are you sure...it’s ok to be doing this? I don’t know how I feel about this.”

“Aww,” he tilted your face towards his own with a soft touch. “Of course it’s ok, beautiful. We’re just practicing, yeah?”

“But...it doesn’t feel like...like...”

“Like what, baby bird?” His wings fanned the air lazily as they cacooned you both. “Like practice? Oh but it is.”

He clutched your hand and slid it up between your breasts, his much larger one engulfed it. “Feel how your heart beat has slowed? Hm? The way your breath has evened out. You’re so much more relaxed now, aren’t you?”

“Yesss,” you sighed, but honestly it was because you were so turned on.

His clothed knee pried it’s way between your legs slightly, giving your burning sex something to grind on.

“See? I knew you could do it.” He smiled. “If you’re going to be a model, you have to know how to be cool under any circumstance, you know? For example. If the director wants us to get a little more Intimate, like this,” his long fingers dipped below your skimpy panties and brushed just above your clit. “You’ll have to keep calm and let me, won’t you?”

“I—I guess so, but,” you bit your lip and moaned as Hawks suddenly pressed his knee harder against your cunt.

“And when they tell you to touch me, like this,” his other hand reached around to wrap your fingers around the erection poking through his pants. You could feel a damp spot from the Pre that had leaked through.

“Would...would they really expect all this?” You asked. This felt so...wrong? But fuck did it feel good.

“Of course, Baby, it’s all apart of the job. That’s why what we’re doing is so important.”

Without warning, his fingers dipped between the soaked lips of your sex, breaking the quiet intimacy as you moaned with sudden pleasure.

“Fuck,” Hawks groaned. His fingers swam in your tight, wet cunt, flexing for that perfect spot. “Feels good doesn’t it, baby bird?“

Your pussy smacked from the three long digits plunging into it and every time Hawks worked his fingers your round ass grinded against his flexing dick.

“This, Hawksss-ah fuck!—this-we shouldn’t be doing this...”

“Oh, Angel,” he cooed, “it’s alright. You want this job, don’t you?”

“Yesss,” you groaned. “Yes I do.”

“It’s an amazing opportunity isn’t it?”

“It is.” You squeezed his manhood as his thumb began to press your clit. The pleasure spiking through out your body made your wings twitch against his hard, bare chest.

He moaned. “Working with me could lead to many more opportunities, Little Birdie, so long as you learn how to go with the flow. Understand?”

Swallowing hard you nodded.

“Good girl. I’m gonna take care of you, baby bird. Tomorrow and every shoot afterward.”

There was something smug in his heady voice, he spun you to face him, and two vermillion feathers detached from his wings. Your eyes followed them as they hooked into the hem of your panties and slid them down.

“Wait—Hawks. Do you expect me to—“

“I expect you to be professional, Baby bird.” He cut in, hands squeezing and massaging your thick ass. Without warning he scooped your body up and had your thighs around his waist. “You’re going to be a good little leading lady, aren’t you?” He smirked.

You fingers dug into the skin surrounding his wing joints as you held on. Your eyes were wide with surprise and hazy with desire. Fuck! you wanted this man, but this was a lot—even for you.

“I do want to do a good job.” You agreed.

“Oh you will, baby.” He lowered you against his straining dick.

“Fuck...” your head snapped back.

One hand remained on your ass cheek while another slid up below your wings, the pad of his thumb circled the skin there making you coo in satisfaction.

“God damn, Birdie. I promise, this is going to open doors for you.”

He was lowering you again, this time you felt the tip of him press between your folds.

“Wouldn’t you like that? To work for me? To be my go-to girl. My little muse?”

His wings stretched wide, catching the bright studio lights in your periphery. Your gaze, however, remained on those smoldering golden irises with their slitted black pupils.

“I would like that, Hawks.” You whispered back, your fingers stroked his feathery blonde hair.

“Ohhh,” he groaned out as he slipped your juicy pussy down on his length. “I bet you would like that, Birdie.” His wings flapped as you cried out in ecstasy.

The lights became blurred as your eyes screwed shut, and then you were in the air. Hawks held your ass firm in both hands. Every flap of his wings made you bounce along his thick member and sent delicious ecstasy shooting through your body.

Behind you, your own wings were flapping as well, as if trying to match his pace. He was gazing at you with a mix of lust and admiration.

“God, you’re fucking sexy. You’re gonna be my little muse—my little love bird, aren’t you? I’ll mold you into the perfect model. Fuckkk!”

He sighed at the feeling of your walls squeezing him. He knew you would feel amazing. The minute he saw those headshots, he knew he had to have you in more ways than one. His sharp canines found your neck and bit into the flesh.

“H-Hawks!”

“Don’t worry, baby, we’ll cover it tomorrow. I’m going to take care of everything for my little muse. Fuck! Ahh god, you feel fuuucking good.”

His balls smacked against you. The friction of his pelvis brushed against your swollen clit making your cunt convulse in pleasure. Ecstasy kept crashing over you in shock waves.

“Ohh fuck, Hawks, god-ahhh-shii!��

Your pussy creamed around the hard dick pummeling into it.

“Yeah, my little model. Pretty, little birdie.” He praised.

His wings seemed to work faster and harder making you bounce even harder. Hawks caught one of your hard nipples in between his teeth, tongue slipping around the bumpy areolas and flicking the bud.

“Oh my godddd, oh my fuck—“

Your pussy flexed around his dick as your orgasm washed over you.

“Shhh fuccckkk yes, y/n!” The blonde cried out, feeling your nails dig into the skin of his back.

You were no longer forming words as Hawks continued to bounce you on his twitching cock, sinking a finger into your asshole and adding more pressure. Another orgasm exploded over you. He kept bouncing you, his blonde bangs plastered to his sweat slicked forehead.

“I’m gonna fucking cum,” he mumbled against your neck. “Fuck, fuck, fuck!”

You heard a couple studio lights topple over as his wings worked even harder towards his release, and when he came he came hard and hot and heavy.

His whole body tensed with the action and his head flung back. Christ. He was beautiful.

Slowly, he lowered the pair of you back on to the ground, still holding on to you.

Your mind was still swimming as Hawks pressed kisses up your throat until he reached your lips. Then he smirked.

“My little muse,” he mumbled between kisses, “I’m gonna mold you into the perfect little model. Promise.”