#and to this day i wish i'd kept it and made it a necklace or something

[daedrabela]

sometimes i'll just be chilling with my bf and i start talking about something weird that happened to me as a kid/when i was younger and it turns out that was a whole ass trauma and then we sit there looking at each other like 😮

[azures-bazar]

Fairest of Them All

That's a long one, I'm being quite busy these days because of my new job so let's say my mistakes are mostly due to me writing this by night :') Remember, I'm French and I'm terribly sorry for my humble grammar.

I'm even roasting French champagne here lol

Female reader this time, I'd love to make a male version someday ! Next one will be a Kieran x GenderNeutral!Reader one shot (if I have time) !

Arthur Morgan x Female!Reader 

Word count : 2.5k

Short summary : You were invited to the Mayor’s party along with Dutch, Hosea and Arthur. However, you were tasked to arrive a some time after them. 

A/Note : First female fiction, let’s give this a try ! This is basically taking place during The Gilded Cage mission, with slight changes.

Tags : beautiful red dress, fireworks, chapter 4, Arthur is absolutely thrilled, all eyes on you, love, you are BEAUTIFUL (yes)

What a peculiar party ! This is what Arthur thought while looking around, lost among all these guests, all dressed up for the occasion. He analysed mens silhouettes, their top hats and fancy suits, some of them wore gloves while drinking this expensive champagne common people could never afford. According to Mayor Lemieux, who could be heard nearby, he had ordered these fancy bottles from France. Arthur had tried some of it and, unfortunately, it was not as good as he thought… but not many folks would ever have the opportunity to taste such an expensive beverage ! He would have been a fool not to try it, it was probably his only chance. Despite looking exactly like a man from the upper class, holding his glass of champagne while trying to take part to a random conversation, Arthur felt mostly uncomfortable.

Arthur quickly glanced at women around him, wearing their most sumptuous dresses. The shapes of their bustles were exactly the same, their sleeves were mostly large and puffy, giving the illusion that their waists were quite small. Some of them wore extravagant accessories, pearl necklaces, rings and bracelets along with feathers or flowers in their hair, while men were mostly displaying their extravagance in tiny details like golden pocket watches, silky cravats or brooches attached to the top of their black jackets. Arthur felt like an intruder, a stranger. Dutch and Hosea had a natural ease with these people, even Bill was trying his best to fit in ! But Arthur was not, he could not. 

"What a nice party !" a woman said. "This champagne is remarkable !"

"Indeed it is !" a man sounded. "It comes straight from France ! "

People kept talking around him, this overwhelming crowd made it uneasy to focus on what he had to do. Retrieve informations for Bronte would be quite difficult as his attention was triggered by every single sound he heard : clinging glasses, footsteps and laughs were quick for him to feel lost. He kept glancing around him to see if Hosea was nearby. Dutch would frequently check on him while still trying his best to keep up in many conversations, but Arthur felt like a child lost in a crowd of people dressed in fancy outfits, deeply wishing to go home. Yes, he wanted to go back to Shady Belle and lay on his bed, he didn’t even want to be here ! 

Meanwhile, you entered the mansion and were quickly greeted by Angelo Bronte, was surrounded by his men. He had expressly told Dutch to bring you along. Your presence was requested, Dutch obliged and sent you and the girls to Saint-Denis' tailor to get you one of the most beautiful dresses the shop could offer. You had first suggested to wear Molly’s dress, but the latter was already jealous enough for you to feel bad about your invitation. Molly possessed this beautiful black and green dress with golden layers which could fit you but was told by Dutch that she would not come with them. You were there to witness her sudden sadness as you were leaving with the girls to get dressed in a bedroom they rented in Saint-Denis. 

"Looking good in this dress, Miss Y/SN." Bronte said

This dress was large but beautiful, looking quite similar to the ones worn by the beginning of the decade, if not even prior. The back of its skirt was quite puffy, reminiscing of the bustle era from the late 1860s, but Tilly managed to make it look a little more modern to fit the current fashion standards. It had four shades of red with white layers and a nice ivory bow holding your waist. Your shoulders were bare, but you did not mind much. Mary-Beth had crafted you a matching necklace and managed to steal Molly’s black gloves to complete your gorgeous attire. Your corset was tight, but you did not care. In fact, you felt great in this dress. 

"Your acolytes have arrived." Bronte restarted. "You may join them." 

"Am I late ?" you asked

"Certainly not." 

The girls had managed to get someone to give you a proper ride to the Mayor’s house, wishing you luck. Bronte was already there, waiting for you. He kissed your gloved hand and placed it on his arm, guiding you through the entrance hall of the house towards the back garden. You nervously glanced around, observing this beautiful and large mansion, still keeping an eye on Bronte’s overall behaviour. You had a knife attached to one of your thighs, nobody would suspect such a beautiful lady enough to ask you to lift your dress up to show them if you were hiding any weapons underneath. In order to avoid any doubts regarding your presence, Bronte had mentioned that you were his niece and that he wanted you to get more familiar to Saint-Denis’ high society. You knew about that as soon as he introduced you to a man in the back of the Mayor’s mansion. 

"This is my niece, Viola." Bronte smiled as the other man kissed your hand 

"Viola…?" you whispered, quickly sending an awkward glance towards Bronte’s men 

"What a beautiful niece you have here, Signor Bronte !" the man smiled. "I hope you will enjoy this party, Mademoiselle."

You had no time to respond, Bronte had dragged you to the door leading to the back garden. You grumbled a little, feeling uncomfortable. You did not look like him, how could anyone believe the two of you were related ? You sighed as Bronte’s men opened the door, allowing you finally get to the garden. People were suddenly rendered silent to the sight of Bronte holding you under his arm. 

Quite surprised by the sudden lack of talks which had been overwhelming for endless minutes, Arthur turned back to the doors and gasped. As he noticed you, holding Bronte’s arm with the most confused face he had ever seen, his heart suddenly stopped beating. You hated dragging everyone’s attention on you, and people’s silence made you feel uneasy, despite the music was still being played. Arthur watched Bronte whisper something to your ear and gently push you forward, you went downstairs as people restarted chatting. However, Arthur was, once and for all, lost in his deepest thoughts. 

While looking at you going downstairs in your beautiful red dress, Arthur felt like time had stopped. He could no longer hear people talk around him, some of them were nearly gone. The rest of the world did no longer exist to his eyes, and the only clear thing he could see was you. You, beautifully joining the rest of the guests, shyly turning your face down, unable to look at these people. Arthur only had eyes for you, only you. Your beauty had made him loose his composure, he kept his eyes wide open as you finished your descent, gently grabbing a glass of champagne a waiter had quickly presented to you. 

"Jesus Christ…" Arthur mumbled 

You were beautiful, so beautiful ! This dress suited you so much and was so flattering, your hairstyle was perfect… everything Arthur could see led him to think he was looking at the most beautiful angel of a Renaissance painting. Only you, Tilly and Mary-Beth had the opportunity to see the dress, leaving Arthur, Dutch, Hosea and Bill mesmerised by the way it suited you. Arthur wanted to run to you and compliment you. He loved the way you looked, the way you walked around, the way you were holding yourself. Despite noticing how uncomfortable you were, Arthur was baffled by your capacity to act like a woman of Saint-Denis’ high society ! 

Dutch and Hosea were proud of the way you acted, they had taught you right. Since your arrival, back where you were in your mid-teens, Hosea had taught you to perform scams, but also to behave depending on your surroundings. You were a chameleon, taught so well that nobody could have guessed your true nature. Even you felt strange when you had first looked in the mirror after putting this dress on !

Arthur was about twenty-five when you came and had always been friendly towards you. He had seen you grow and mature into the woman you were that day. However, your relationship had been quite peculiar since a few months, as Arthur had appeared to display evident signs of attraction towards you, awkwardly offering you flowers he would leave by your tent or drawings he would hide under your pillow. That Blackwater incident had brought the two of you much closer, enough for you not to bother about kissing him before the rest of the gang anymore. However, that night, you had to forget about this idea. 

Arthur was dragged out of his thoughts by a man gently tapping his shoulder. In fact, he had completely stopped his sentence in the middle of a conversation about Wapiti Indians. He softly apologised to the group of people surrounding him, taking a step back. In no way could he not go and, at least, break Dutch’s command and talk to you. He could not avoid it, you were like a magnet, waiting there alone by the gazebo. 

"‘Scuse me." Arthur said, walking away

You could not hold your smile as you noticed Arthur walking towards you, his eyes wide open, unable to look away. How beautiful you were, even sipping some champagne, finding its taste rather common and not worth these compliments people kept making about it and its provenance. Arthur stood before you for a second, so mesmerised by your beauty that he could not even say a word, his smile being so sweet and genuine that it made you chuckle at little. You knew you had won his heart just by looking at him.

"Good evening, Miss." Arthur said, gently taking your gloved hand to kiss it 

"Sir." you smiled back 

"M-may I say… you look gorgeous tonight, Miss." 

"Thank you, Sir."

Arthur smiled even more. People started dancing waltz near you, you gently placed your glass on the nearest table and caught Arthur's hand to dance with him. He was terrified, for some reason. Terrified and thrilled to dance with you. He was good at it, Dutch had taught him some easy moves back when he was younger, but your beauty was quick to make him loose his self control. He placed his hand on your waist and started dancing with you while people minded their own business, except Dutch. Despite you looked absolutely adorable together, Arthur had disobeyed his orders. The two of you had different tasks for the night, you were not even supposed to talk to each other… but it was too late. 

"Enjoyin’ the party, Miss Y/SN ?" Arthur asked 

"It’s Miss Bronte for tonight, Sir." you calmly responded with a quick wink. "Viola Bronte."

"Oh, didn’t know Signor Bronte had relatives in Saint-Denis, Viola Bronte."

"Me neither."

The two of you chuckled, looking into each other’s eyes for a moment while dancing. Arthur would have wanted to dance all night long with you, he would have wanted to be alone with you. Just the two of you. You were like a star to his eyes, the most beautiful star, she most shiny one. Among these women, only you had caught Arthur’s whole attention. Your attitude, posture, attire… there was no doubt, he loved you. You were the fairest of them all. 

You kept looking into his starry eyes, his smile was the beautifulest gift he could offer you. His puppy glance and sweet facial expression were worth everything, it was hard to resist to the temptation to kiss him right away. In fact, it had always been hard not to give up and do whatever he wanted, his eyes would win you over anytime ! 

"You’re beautiful." he said, blushing a little 

You were like magnets, unable to be taken away from each other. Nobody could separate you in your dance, not even fireworks which were launched by the end of this modernised version of one of Bach’s symphonies. You quickly turned to the sky to watch them, your mouth remained half opened as you did not even notice you were still holding onto Arthur’s hand. Neither you nor him could take your eyes away from the fireworks, you kept smiling while looking at them until Dutch passed by you, giving Arthur the task to subdue some papers while you had to distract the maids. 

"Get inside, lovebirds." he said. "Don’t get caught, we’ve got papers to retrieve."

The two of you went back inside but neither you nor Arthur could hold it any longer. As soon as got hidden into the Mayor’s office after closing all doors around you, Arthur quickly walked to you and took you by the waist, giving you the most passionate kiss he could offer. Waiting for so long to finally be able to hold you against him… was a hard thing to endure ! 

You held his face between your hands, running your fingers through his short beard. He even applied some Cologne ! You felt his tongue crossing yours, making you shiver of excitement. This was obviously not the best place for the two of you to do something… beyond your tasks, but you still allowed Arthur to run his hands on your thighs while gently pressing your lips against his. Your heart rate increased as you heard someone walk past the room, causing Arthur to jump back from you and crouch under the desk, dragging you with him while chuckling. 

"Is there someone here ?"

"Get down !" he whispered 

One of Bronte’s men had just walked into the room. Arthur kept his finger on his smiling mouth while holding you close to him, waiting for the footsteps to vanish in the distance. The two of you felt like children playing hide and seek, but the festivities had to stop, unfortunately. As Arthur took your hand to help you going leaving your hiding spot, he gently kissed the top of your head. 

"Let’s go home, sweetheart." he whispered, taking your hand. "We’ll continue what we started there."

to be continued, maybe -

[foxes-that-run]

If I could fly

The TLDR is that If I could fly is about Harry being vulnerable with someone he is separated from by distance which is painful. Harry wrote it in February before the OTRA tour. When asked about it in the Track by Track, (1:52) Harry spoke about the album for 2 minutes, when prompted he covered his body language was closed before saying it 'kind of fell down, it was natural to sing it' then talked about Johan. Thank for sharing your music Harry.

When was it written

Harry wrote it with Johan Carlson and Ross Golan in Los Angeles. Johan said they wrote together several days a week over four weeks leading up to the On the Road Again tour, which started 7 February 2015. Harry wrote with Johan on ‘Just a Little Piece of your heart’, ‘I love you’, Maybe Someday and 'Stockholm Syndrome'. Johan said:

"He's such a good songwriter - it's an honour to write music with him. He's fantastic with the words and he can really put down lyrics that are very conversational and people can relate to. We're just having a good time."

Niall also said Made in the AM was written in January and February, before Zayn left the band in March. He also told Ryan Seacrest the bulk of the album was written before tour and recorded on the road.

Live performances

One Direction never performed it live and Harry hasn't since 2018. Harry included it in his first main setlist throughout 2018. He performed it on the B stage after Sweet Creature. When performing it live Harry paused, shushed the crowd with a finger for up to 2 minutes before saying "it's your turn" for them to sing the last chorus and "I feel it," both of which Harry led on the album.

What the band said about it

To Apple Music Liam said he got emotional listening to "the song Harry wrote", which is likely 'If I Could Fly' because his other writing credits were with 1D and/or 1D writers. Harry deflected answering what it is about but said it was a farewell (to a hoodie they had been joking about). The farewell is interesting to me as the lyrics are ambiguous to me, Harry sings of being apart from his muse, going out of mind and hoping they don’t run from him.

Julian Bunetta said to Rolling Stone:

“I remember when Harry first played it to me. That one I didn’t write, but I remember when I first heard it. We were in Westlake Studio for a week. I kept asking why he wanted to call it ‘If I Could Fly.’ It’s a great song, so it doesn’t really matter what it’s called, does it?”

The title is only in the first line, compared to 'for your eyes only' which is the main line of the chorus. If I could fly is a reference to the paper airplane necklace and Taylors Out Of The Woods "Two paper airplanes flying, flying, flying". It also sets the meaning of the song as about someone he's physically apart from rather than the band or fans.

Timeline

27 October - 1989 release, Harry and Taylor seen together again in November and December. (2014 timeline)

10 January - 4 weeks writing with Johan incl. 'If I could Fly'

16 January - The last time Harry and Taylor were seen together before the Exile BBMAs was Lily Aldridge's birthday. (WITW)

1 February - Taylor not at Harry's 21st birthday, in Nashville the next day, maybe broke up (Hunger and Coney Island).

7 February - ORTA tour start, end of writing period.

14 February - Style Music Video released and Two Ghosts written.

27 February - Harry posted the overgrown Winding Wheel.

7 November - Harry Tweeted 'If I could fly' before it was released. He had given Taylor the Airplane necklace on 7 November 2012.

Lyrics

If I could fly I'd be comin' right back home to you

"If I could fly" is not an obvious title for this song, but was important to Harry.

The opening of Taylor’s vault track The Very First Night is “I wish I could fly / I'd pick you up and we'd go back in time”

It is one of Harry's last One Direction songs, he fly's (over an ocean and woods) in the MV his first solo song, Sign of the Times, which works as a through line. Harry said to Jimmy Fallon that he 'would have been happy with a green screen' which sounds like the flying was his idea before he got concepts.

Harry has sung about flying and the distance separating him from his muse many times, especially in One Direction songs. This title and opening lyric are clear the song is about someone Harry is separated from by touring and living internationally:

Fools Gold "You're the shining distraction that makes me fly home"

Half The World Away "Never gonna be the same / 'Cause you're half the world away"

Lay down "Hearts are divided / Now that we’re worlds apart"

Trouble "And you know that i’ll be gone in the morning"

Already home "You don’t have to go, but you’re already leaving" and "From aeroplanes to the bullet trains, summer skies to the pouring rain / All the future plans we will never make, from a beating heart to the farthest place"

Daylight "If I was a bluebird, I would fly to you"

Canyon Moon "I'll be gone too long from you"

Daydreaming "You know I'll be gone for so long / So give me all of your love, give me something to dream about"

Since meeting Harry while writing Red, Taylor has sung about flying in more than 10 songs about him, most closely in The Very First Night: "I wish I could fly, I’d pick you up and we’d go back in time"

Home is also an important theme in Harry's music, home being with the person rather than a physical place.

I think I might Give up everything, just ask me to

Here, in Maybe Someday and in Taylors 'The Lakes' they have both sung about being together after giving up their careers, Slut! and Gold Rush Also has a similar message.

however on Harry's House in Music for a Sushi Restaurant and As it Was Harry started to say he should be able to have both because 'he's not going to go broke' or 'you know it's not the same.'

Pay attention, I hope that you listen 'Cause I let my guard down Right now I'm completely defenseless

Harry guards his privacy carefully, he has spoke in the Behind the Album that the world knew everything about him in the band and he found he didn't like that. To let someone in is important.

For your eyes only I'll show you my heart For when you're lonely And forget who you are I'm missing half of me When we're apart Now you know me For your eyes only For your eyes only

I really love the phrasing of 'when you're lonely and forget who you are' it beautifully communicates how highly Harry thinks of his muse, but knows they don't see themselves as he does. This is quite similar to

Lay Down: "Two Hearts are divided / Now that we’re worlds apart, They seem so hard to take"

Satellite "I can see you're lonely down there, Don't you know that I am right here?"

Little Freak "I was thinkin' about who you are / Your delicate point of view"

I've got scars Even though they can't always be seen And pain gets hard But now you're here and I don't feel a thing

This verse gets me everytime. Harry is speaking about past trauma, which he also touched on with Rolling Stone discussing his parents separating and wanting to protect his mother, as well as internet criticism. Taylor Swift has a similar story in Seven, and in Cardigan "You drew stars around my scars"

I can feel your heart inside of mine I feel it, I feel it I've been goin' out of my mind I feel it, I feel it Know that I'm just wastin' time And I hope that you don't run from me

To me the outcome for the relationship in the song is ambiguous, as it may have been for Harry. He’s vulnerable, hoping the person doesn’t run from him, but is leaving and thinks he wasting his time. To me this reflects a relationship that’s complex, but clearly special. As we can see with how Harry didn’t want to discuss the song.

This verse reminds me of these lyrics.

Sweet Creature "Two hearts in one home"

Where do broken hearts go "Mind is running in circles of you and me"

Fools Gold "You're the raise on the waves that calm my mind"

[slay-3-r]

token of love, gratitude, and a success story here <333 💌

I'd like to thank you for sharing such a genius manifestation technique.

i.e. to create an Instagram private account to manifest your dream life by posting what you desire to have by using Pinterest photos.

🧿Ok so here goes the story...

I have recently finished school and am waiting for my university entrance results.

During this long vacation, I had been in a slump as I wished to focus on getting some rest but I got too bored. I wanted to do something productive and start fresh but had no idea what needed to be done.

After reading your post I created a private insta account and posted some images from Pinterest of the things which I wish to add to my daily routine and also some possessions which I wished to manifest.

Here is the screenshot of my account 👇

And MAN DO I TELL YOU I DID MANIFEST. (like magic✨)

I posted a bunch of pearl accessories that I had always wanted, and I got it 😱. My mom just gifted me a pearl necklace and pearl earrings along with that. My dad had bought a pearl that had been kept for YEARS as it is but now he is gonna order it to be made as a pearl pendant for me soon 🦪. Just like magic, pearls are starting to appear in my life.

I have started to play guitar again after a long time of being burnt out because of it. But now I want to play it like none other.

I had not been productive and it got boring to not have a routine. The gym is pretty far from my home however my dad bought dumbbells all of a sudden. And he is also gonna buy a treadmill soon. We'll have a mini gym at home. And all of a sudden my mom has been asking me to do yoga which I've made as a part of my routine. Also, I bought new self-help books to read in my free time. I have also enrolled in some courses to enhance and learn new hard and soft skills as I wish to start freelancing in college.

Ok now as you can see I have also saved some relationship goals pictures, and a guy reading books. And I got a text message from an old friend of mine who was really into reading books, he was also very observant of me. And it seems like he has feelings for me all of a sudden >~<, plus dude is magnificent ngl. Rn I'm kind of anxious about our connection for some reason though, I don't wanna go deep into this relationship for now but talking to him has gotten a bit too intense lately. He flirts like a god 🫣. I had specifically wished for a guy with Leo or Capricorn placements and he is a Leo sun and moon (in 10th house, house of capricorn). And our synastry is amazing!

The shocking yet exciting thing is that I just made the account two days prior and I'm already seeing results. I'm so grateful for this!

It is just like magic indeed. We sure do live in a dreamland 🪽🩷.

Omg thank u for sharing your success story with me, i am really so happy for u <33

I believe you can manifest more than that you’re amazing. And the things that u manifest are gorgeous.

I love u and i hope you share more success stories with me <33

[wlwfav]

I'd love to hear about your AU!! It sounds really interesting:)

omg ok ok i hope you are ready for unhinged and messy rambling..... anyways more about angels of death role reversal au below

first off i want to say this au is 100% inspired by this amazing art, like when i tell you seeing that work FLIPPED something in my brain. go show that artist some love!!!

so basically in this au all of the floor masters have essentially "swapped" roles, but they are still their canon ages because that is just. infinitely funnier to me

anyways the swapped roles are as follows:

ray and zack

danny and cathy

gray and eddie

and now here's the rough background and whatnot for each character:

zack

following the role of ray in this au, zack wishes to die and wants ray to kill him. his personality is much more apathetic and a bit of a 'blank slate', similar to canon!ray. unlike canon!ray, however, zack is still not smart sdfgsdfgsgfs. he never learned how to read in this au. he very much still relies on his strength and survival instincts to get by, he is just much more... chill about it.

he was set on fire by his father when he was young, but he never developed a fear of fire like his canon counterpart. instead, he has a more apathetic view on it. he does not wear bandages in this au. he does, however, wear the same hoodie, but the arrow resembles a cross (like shown in the art i linked above). he also has a cross necklace that was given to him by his therapist, cathy (we will get to that later...)

zack was never sent to the orphanage after being burned, but instead he remained at home with his biological parents, and of course it was not a good home life :/ his parents saw he was strong enough to survive being burnt alive and basically said "hey, this kid's resilience might be useful to us" and so they kept him around so he could do the chores/housework and other odd jobs to get money, usually so his parents could buy drugs and/or booze. he never went to school or got any education. zack had to do what he could to feed himself and get by. due to doing just about any sort of physical labor to get payment, he developed strength and street smarts.

his parents viewed him as "a monster" due to his appearance, and constantly reminded him they only kept him around because he was useful. in zack's mind, he thought maybe his parents would love them if they were monsters too.

when zack got the chance, he would try watching movies, and that became one of his favorite past times. he particularly liked thriller/slasher films.

zack continued to live with his parents until he was around 19. he never thought to leave because he didn't know anything else, and there was a part of him that did care for his parents (similar to canon!ray's feelings towards her own parents). one day, zack's mom was caught with another man, causing his dad to flip out and stab both of them to death. zack, being home, heard and saw everything. his dad tries to kill him too, but zack remembered one film he saw with this similar scenario, and ends up successfully - and fatally - stabbing his father. as a means to "fix" things, zack sets their bodies on fire, thinking this made his family "more equal" now that they've all been severely burned (or, in other words, he is making everyone look like the monsters they truly are)

when the police came to take zack away, they weren't arresting him on murder charges, but instead they (correctly) saw he was a victim acting out of self defense, so they send him off to therapy where he meets....... cathy.

and that's where the main story unfolds in a similar way to canon. cathy ends up becoming obsessed with zack, and begs eddie to let him have his own floor - B1. cathy gifts him a cross necklace, hoping it would help zack "fit in" as a floor master, but eddie places a bible on zack's floor and well.... we all know how it goes from there :')

small side note: zack never actually went by 'zack' before meeting ray, he was only ever referred to as isaac, and even called himself by that name. ray gives him the nickname 'zack'!!!

ray

ray is an infamous serial killer in this au, and is dubbed by the media as "the patchwork killer", due to her sewing up her victims after she murders them, as well as the patchwork all across her own body (again, like in the art i linked earlier)

like canon!zack, she is more deranged and outspoken, but she is still just as smart as her canon counterpart. despite (obviously) not attending school, she still loves to read and tries to self-educate herself in between killings. she really is just some weird 13 y/o girl doing her own thing in this au lmfao

despite her intelligence, she is still small and physically weak, making it difficult for her to kill people unless she has her handgun. she still keeps a knife in her bag as a back-up. even though she is small and rather weak, she is nothing to scoff at. she has killed many, many people, and sewn up their corpses afterwards to make them "perfect" in her eyes.

ray ends up teaming up with zack to take advantage of his strength and height, knowing it will help her escape the building.

ray grew up with her parents who owned an illegal orphanage, and her parents treated the kids pretty badly. they would often force ray to stitch up the wounds of the orphans.

ray got her appearance due to the abuse she endured from her parents, and her mother would forcibly sew her up after. ray ends up keeping the patchwork look on both herself and her victims as a means to "reclaim" what happened to her.

similar to canon!zack's fear of fire, ray has a fear of water. her father tried to drown her when she was younger, but her mother managed to save her. not out of love, but because she saw ray as someone she could use. ray has been terrified of the water ever since.

one day, ray is trying to stitch an orphan's wounds, but the kid ends up dying. ray, out of curiosity, decides to continue sewing the kid back together, in order to make them "perfect". when she's done and she looks at her work, a switch sort of just. flips in her brain. and she realizes she wants to kill more people and "fix" them in her own way. and so, she snaps and kills her parents, along with the other orphans, and "fixes" them to her liking.

after that, the story picks up and she lives her life on the run. i'm not sure if i would want to include ray's own "blind old man" in this au yet, nor how that would work, but yeah.

cathy

cathy's story is pretty similar to her canon counterpart's, but instead of becoming a jailer, she became a therapist.

she's a counselor of sorts for "troubled adults", and she uses her job to find the most "sinful criminals" (in her eyes), and study/punish them in her own way. her goal is to find the most "ideal criminal", and punish them for all of eternity. she wants to "fix them" by making them worse.

and, of course, when she meets zack... she believes he's exactly what she's been looking for. she wants to keep him by her side forever so she can understand him, and encourage his "sinful" behavior

danny

like cathy, au!danny is similar to his canon counterpart, but he's just a jailer now. he keeps people locked up so he can admire their dead, hopeless eyes until the end of time.

ray is someone he becomes obsessed with, because despite everything that happened to her, her eyes still sparkle with manic life. and he wants to be the one to snuff that light out.

gray

like canon!gray, au!gray also grew up in a cult, but instead of being the like. next chosen pastor or whatever, he instead was in charge of the graveyard. he views himself as a grim reaper of sorts; being in charge of guiding people to the next life by making their graves. he believes he is the only one capable of putting people to rest in the way god intended.

in the building, he becomes the grave keeper for all the sacrifices that pass through.

he takes an interest in zack, as he is the only floor master who really feels pity for him. he sees zack has suffered, and wants to give him the most "peaceful rest" as possible as a means to alleviate zack's pain.

eddie

yeah this 12 year old runs this whole murder building. and what about it!

anyways instead of being born into a grave-keeping family, eddie was born into a family of. pastors i guess gfdsgdfgsdfg he basically grew up only knowing church and. that's it

eddie's personality is an odd mixture of both canon!gray and canon!eddie's personalities. au!eddie is still childish and often lets his feelings get the better of him, yet he still gives off a more mature and regal aura.

like canon!gray, eddie became interested in testing if people were angels or sacrifices. if they were truly devoted to god.

eddie believes only he truly understands god, and therefore, only eddie can truly judge one's sins in place of god. he decides to start his little "experiment" when it's revealed albert will take over the family church instead of eddie, and eddie believed albert was the furthest from god one could get.

basically, he is trying to weed out "false gods" and those who follow said false gods

like his canon counterpart, eddie has a bit of a crush on ray. he views her as the perfect angel. he also views zack as the perfect sacrifice.

and yeah i guess that's about it! this is a really rough outline and there are definitely some parts to this au that could use some fine-tuning but overall, this is an au i'm really attached to sfdgsfdgsdfgsdfg

[zaynahfrozenfrost]

When We Met Part 2

Part 1

Me and my friends woke up quite early in the morning. Then we showered, did our makeup and chose our outfits. I wore a navy blue sweater, 3 quarter black pants with flats. I wore some small dainty earrings and a bracelet on the right hand. After we got ready, we went to eat breakfast in the hotel we were staying in. When we finished our breakfast, Timothée came to pick us up. We hopped into the car.

"So, where are we going?" I asked Timothée.

"First, we'll go to the Louvre Museum, then the French Riviera and lastly La Palette Café." Timothée said.

"Today's going to be a long day." Emma said.

The next thing we knew, we arrived at the Louvre Museum. Gosh, it was so huge and so many amazing artifacts! That day was very windy and my hair kept coming in my face. Then, Timothée came close and he got that strand of hair out of my face. Holy crispy biscuits, he smelled beautiful and he looked so charming up close. I thanked him and we went on to see other things in the museum. We saw artworks such as the Mona Lisa, Liberty Leading The People, The Wedding Feast At Cana etc. We saw so many fascinating things there. Then, we went to the French Riviera. It was breathtakingly beautiful, we took many pictures there. The water was blue and bright, and there were so many people. After many hours of roaming around, we decided to have lunch at La Palette. Other than the desserts, the food at this place was alright. Then, we went back to our hotel to get some rest. Then, Timothée called me from his phone.

"Hey, what are you doing Y/n?" He asked

"Laying in bed, resting." I said

"If I asked you to come with me alone, would you come?" He asked me

"What is it? Why do you want me to come with you?" I asked

"I wanna show you something special." He told me

"Alright, do I have to wear a certain outfit?" I asked

"Yes, while I was escorting you and your friends to your hotel room, I saw an off white crepe dress with pleats, and I'd like it if you could wear that." He requested me

"Alright, I'll be ready in an hour. When are you gonna come to pick me up?"

"I'll arrive as soon as possible. I'll see you later, bye." He said

"Bye"

I took a shower again, and then wore my J. Crew 365 crepe dress with pleats which was the one he described. Then, I dried my hair, wore a pearl necklace and heels. Then Timothée came to pick me up.

"Where are we going?" I asked Timothée.

"To the place where dreams are made" He said smilingly.

After we arrived, he told me to close my eyes. We went through an elevator and some stairs.

"How long do I have to keep my eyes shut? I'm feeling petrified." I said to him.

"We're almost there, don't be afraid I'm here with you" He assured me

Those 7 words were enough to make my fear feel less. Then, we got up.

"Y/n, open your eyes."

"Wow, w-where is this place? It's so beautiful, I can see the entire city. People look like ants from here." I said, feeling awestruck.

"This is the Eiffel Tower, I wanted to show you this place like you wished to see."

"Oh Timothée, you don’t know how much this means to me, thank you!"

And then, the most unexpected thing happened. We kissed and it felt like my heart had exploded, that kiss was so breathtaking I cannot describe it.

"I love you Y/n, I really do." He said

"Ohhh, I love you more than you could ever imagine." I said

Then, we went to a restaurant called Bar of The Eiffel Tower to have dinner. The food was actually good, better than La Palette Café. Then, he dropped me home and I kissed him on the cheek. I was so happy that I couldn’t sleep all night while smiling like an idiot. I hope this love continues to be the one I hope for.

[chumby4life]

Much-belated Xmas/New Year's Chronicle

Very late and very happy New Year to all :). I never actually use this blog for, well, actually blogging, so I thought why not. I can't be bothered to make a separate one, or just keep a diary for that matter, so this is what you get.

Christmas was pretty good. I spent the actual day of it working, but eh what you can do. I listen to other people's woes for a living, and I was completely expecting all of my conversations to be from people who were sad about the holidays. Suicide rates are highest that time of year, after all. Surprisingly, I saw none of that. It was just the usual problems you hear about - relationship/academic/financial struggles mostly. I guess maybe I was projecting my own dissatisfaction with the holidays onto my job haha.

Saw my mom and sisters afterward, I was happy to finally make enough money to get them nice gifts. Though seeing family always makes me a bit uncomfortable. I think my favorite gift this year was the Beerus S.H. Figuarts from my friend :)

For new year's I visited my college town to see my friends for the first time in a while. Being a homebody with a remote job, I usually am just dressed like crap, so it was a nice opportunity to dress up. My hair is severely unmanageable, so allow me some pride and vanity in showing it off.

You should see it in its natural state...Actually, you shouldn't lol. Ignore my flushed complexion - these were taken after a few drinks. I was very happy to see one friend in particular - we'll call her Birdie - she lets me crash on her couch every time I come to visit since graduating. Though I'd much rather sleep in her bed... Unfortunately, I'm too much of a coward to do anything about that. And I feel like I'm deluding myself whenever I get the sense that she feels the same way.

Anyway, it was fun to resume our little traditions. We saw a movie. We went to a bar we both like, I bought her drinks like the Supreme Gentleman I am. We got shots of a particular brand of whiskey like always - it tastes awful but it's just what we do, idk. Oh, my other favorite gift was this necklace she made for me:

ARGHH just look at that attention to detail! It's based off of Sonic - the blue, the little charms she said were supposed to be like Chaos Emeralds. So cute. And the way it can be worn multiple ways!! It's things like this that make me think maybe she reciprocates my feelings (even though she makes jewelry for our other friends as well). She's also kept a few really stupid things I did over time, things I didn't expect she would keep. One time in 2022 I drew a big tittied Sonic on my class notes - it was especially humorous given the subject matter of the notes. And the dumb shit I drew on her whiteboard she has yet to erase - the terrifying Wario and the Big Green Dub version of Turles (quoting the Big Green Dub was an inside joke in our friend group for a while).

Like, one has to wonder, why keep these things? Do you like me or something?? Are you gay, huh? I wish. I don't even have a clue if Birdie is anything at all - I wouldn't be surprised if she were ace or something given she never talks about it, and has never had a significant other, as far as I know.

The day of New Year's Eve, we went out with some other friends/acquaintances. Unfortunately there isn't much for students to do in Athens besides go out to drink. It's just weird reuniting with people from an earlier phase of your life, people who are the same as ever. Catching up, I listened to them talk about their bands, the shows they went to recently, their finals, etc. Things I would've been concerned with a year ago. Now all I do is work. I was touched at how they congratulated me when I told them what I was up to. "Abby and her big girl job", as they said. It's just kind of bittersweet, you know? I'm just a visitor amongst them now.

I fantasized about using the strike of midnight to my advantage with Birdie. About telling her how I felt, or maybe kissing her, idk. But in reality, it took me a certain amount of alcohol to work up the courage to even hug her. I'm such a coward. Anyway, I am definitely not built for college bars anymore, lol. They're always so packed and loud - not to mention my tolerance isn't what it was.

So yeah, that was my holiday time ramble. I know no one read it, but hey it's kind of fun to use your blog as an actual blog! Maybe this is something I'll do every couple months, idk. Though I don't usually have a lot going on tbh.

[bloodrocketmemoriesv2023]

Chapter 2 - Candlelight

But as I walked down the sidewalk tonight, I couldn’t help but cower at the trees. The stark shadows made them look unreal, floating against the black sky. Like a painting just real enough to not notice at first glance, but any cat or bird would attack and run away in fear. And I would’ve done the same. But I’m not a cat or a bird.

I used to be able to just leave.

I remembered sitting in the backyard at my old house, playing in the dirt with a stick. Despite the soon-to-be gloomy weather, I stayed outside for hours looking into the forest. The edge of it twisting into a cave, with all of the broken, hanging branches, vines, and leaves tangling into a giant, shadowy house. It was old and weathered, with two stories of moss-framed windows, and ripped curtains and veils strewn all over it. It was so black and misty, it could’ve been made of smoke. The front door scared me the most. Not because of who could walk out, but because of how barren I figured the inside of the house was.

What if I walked in there? I thought, shivering.

It scared me everytime I imagined it, but I kept doing it. Because it was fun. I’d frown, smile, frown, smile, and repeat for an entire evening. And my dad never saw it, even with all of those little details I gave him. It made it easy for me to just go inside.

That memory had faded until the storm approached Caedispear, just like before.

So now I’ll be walking down the street, in the soaking rain. But it didn’t bother me at all until I thought about the last time I heard the same exact storm, with the same purple flash in the clouds. The smell of mist and… candles?

Then the thunder bellowed in the sky.

The few candles and the small candles warmed the classroom from a ruined recess. The chalkboard had been erased except for the date. All the desks were pushed against the wall with the stacks of floppy picture books and Scholastic book fair catalogs. I made a nest there, wrapped in my black blanket. The room was spacious enough for no one to notice.

Our teacher, youthful while pushing forty, sat on a plastic crate and held up a small microphone at the end of her necklace. She clicked a button on it, and her voice was silent as a beetle.

"Does anyone want to read this page?" she asked the twenty kids snuggled up on the carpet.

"I will!" A kid with fluffy black hair and a confident smile raised his hand. I'd seen him before, but never heard his voice. His baggy, tan T-shirt looked dirtied from recess.

The teacher sat on the carpet while he patted the pillow on the crate.

He lowered his voice to match the silent cackling of the candle and raindrops on the window. "This isn't just any story. Not like the one Nikki or Mandy told. Mines is about that creepy scarecrow we saw before.”

"From the pumpkin patch?" a girl asked.

"Yes. But did you know he sneaks into classrooms? On days like these? The days that look like nights?"

I think he meant "thunderstorms". Whatever it was, it couldn’t have been as creepy as the “shadow house”.

I turned a page in the book I was reading: Nickel Moon over Capsule Bay. On the cover was a pretty lighthouse, with rocks and a moon behind it.

I wish I snuggled up with the others. I thought I heard knocking in the cabinets.

"He talks to you, feeds you corn, makes you laugh, but you don't see him until he..."

Roar! the thunder went.

"Eats you alive!"

I jumped and banged my elbow against the edge of the desk. The page tore where the rest of them stayed intact. The squeaking metal from the desk's legs turned everyone's heads. Including him. I looked away.

"Darien? Honey? Can you tell the next story?" the teacher waved me over.

"No thank you..."

"What'd he say?" She asked one of the kids closer to the edge of the carpet.

The boy with black hair appeared in front of me. "I'll read it for you!" He held out his hand.

"Why?"

He didn't answer me for some reason. My picture book laid open for the duration of class. The storm persisted. The hallway outside the classroom was cherry and black; the only light being the glowing jack-o-lanterns left over from Halloween. It was almost Thanksgiving. I froze standing in the doorway, but I had to. I had to wait for the other kids to peel their ears away from the story. I learned what his name was; the one who told the story. Mitchell. Like Mitchell Musso; that was the only other Mitchell I knew of.

"Sorry I took so long, Darien." He picked up his book bag and stood by the door.

"It's okay..." I smiled.

"What's wrong?"

I took another look at it. No lights. But there were no lights anywhere. I could freely look the other kids in the eye, and speak without stuttering. I could listen and enjoy Ms. Osborne's stories without being scared. The hallway didn't seem haunted anymore. It felt more like a cozy hug.

"Darien, Mitchell, make sure you tell Ms. Maya I let you go down." Osborne patted my back.

"We will," he said.

"And Darien? Next time, you can wear one of these." She held the small microphone around her neck. "It'll make you louder."

I could only raise an eyebrow at it. How would it make me louder?

Mitchell took my hand and led me down the dim, wide hallway. The widest space was where the front doors stood. Rain polished the small windows like an extra glass layer.

The day waned soon after that. Mitchell and I read some books together on the floor. It seemed like he had a hard time saying some of the words. Mitchell stashed a few books in his bookbag, which was covered in random keychains of cartoon monsters. I liked it so much, I wanted my own book to be in there—the one I was reading before. I gave it to him, and he said he wanted us to read it together.

An hour of reading later, the rain outside turned into a lullaby, and I fell asleep.

If only it were that easy, nowadays.

I had to follow a strict path through the empty streets. Though the fear was more paralyzing then, it was easier for it to fade, and to learn how irrational it was. Even the fears that linger even now, I admire how brave I used to be. But now everything is scary—the dark corner of the room, natural ambience from the apartment. Even the most calming dreams I have now are scarier than the worst nightmares I had as a kid.

What I believe now will be with me forever, even if my heart doesn’t want it to be.

[firewalkwithme36]

Sometimes growing up means breaking your own heart

A day ago I said good bye to someone my heart never really felt safe with but a little piece of me still kinda wanted it to work. He'd been a complicated person in my life. We worked on/made art together for two years. There was this spark between us that made it exciting to work together, to play in a creative space. But he also let me down with one of those projects. He let me down with so many things, but he surprised me too. He's about four years younger than me and that doesn't mean much if your both in your thirties but it's a lot when you're in your twenties. There's just so much that happens in your life, in your heart and head. It puts a pretty big gap between every year you go through them. And omg do you fuck up so many things, shit you care about. But I guess that means you're putting yourself out there enough to really learn something about who you are.

Anyway, about this guy. We dated a few times and he'd always bail when things got to real and wouldn't really talk about any of it. So after college, after the deep lonely blues really set in and 50 job rejections later, I decided to reconnect with him. I was so nervous the whole time sweat was dripping from my arm pits. We kept in touch for while and then met to talk in person when I moved back to the city he lives in. ( Thats a whole complicated story but I'd lived there before and it was the one I'd have the easiest time more permanently moving to. So I did.) He started to do the same song and dance, so I stopped him and said that I want to actually think about doing this not get back into the same cycles again. It ended with him telling me a few days later he wanted to fall in love with me as a friend. I told him I didn't know if I could do that because I'm not sure my heart works like that and I felt too much that he was asking to cut up his favorite parts of me and our relationship to make it into something easier. Also we would never be just friends, we'd always be moving away from being romantically involved. So it's not like we would really be friends. We'd both get jealous when the other started dating some one new and it also wouldn't be appropriate for anyone we were serious about to meet either of us. Our "friendship" would die off.

Things ended with us spending one last night together not pretending that we were just friends or holding anything back. It was a night of last things. A night of dinner, card games, music, movies, talking, holding each other and sex for the last time. Because there aren't many times that you know when the last time will be the last time and I've had to many hastily done good byes to take one more with some one it didn't work out with but I still have deep love for.

So now it's done and keep wishing and secretly hoping he'll text or call and suddenly he's all in the way I always wished he was and it all just works finally.

But life never is like the movies and so I haven't washed my sheets or pjs he wore just so I still have something around other than me, that he's touched. I sniff the necklace he left me because when my heart is breaking and begging me to talk to him it helps trick my brain into thinking he's still around. I make sure that the sheets are tucked in, pillows placed and the boxers he wore just like he left them for me, because I know taking care of people with the little things is his biggest I love you.

Growing up sucks, It's lonely as hell and there are so many times that it means breaking your own heart so you can get where you're meant to be and become who you want to be.

[coffee-n-bagels-comic-universe]

Superheroes with Secrets: Shannon Finds Where He Belongs (Fic Part 190. Set in 2002)

Around 2000 Words. 18+ in places. Please inform me if you wish to be tagged/untagged from posts.

Tags: @tantamount-treason @piratewithvigor @thedollmaker16

Reference Posts: ‘Giantess’/‘Blacklight Bandit’ Kirby Roussimoff x Shane ’Hurricane’ Helms (Circa 2001)

For what seems like half the book, Helms has no face. It isn't until a couple pages from where Shannon's left off that he has a face again. Much older now. Looking like he does in the present day. He's still happy in all the drawings, still in various states of undress. A few pages later, Helms is no longer alone in the drawings. Kirby's with him, looking like some kind of angel. The two of them are breath-taking, just the way Shannon sees them.

"You like both of us? I thought you detested me, oh, come here you," she whispers, pulling Shannon into a tight hug, "I don't hate you, mon petit jouet, I just thought you only cared for Helms, I didn't want to get my feelings hurt so I decided to just have it be me and Shane because I felt I was getting too attached to you, hence why I kept pushing you away."

"I could never hate you… you saved the man I love," he whispers, "you remember that day, probably two months ago when you were making chocolate chip pancakes and singing in French to Lilith?"

"Yeah, I remember, why?"

"I was watching and listening for a long time. Had to pretend I had just walked in when I did, but I had to be there for… hell, close to ten minutes. That was the day I figured out you mean as much to me as Shane does."

"Oh you blonde little beastie, Shannon. Look, I don't hate you, at all, but you need to talk to me, more than you do, if you need anything, as long as it's not sex, I don't really care if you get off to thoughts of me or Shane, it's not like I can control your mind."

"I don't even need sex," he shrugs, "I went without for a long time and in desperation, my hand works fine. What took me out at the knees was thinking that everything was okay and I was getting welcomed in a little more and might even be a part of the family, but…" he closes the sketchbook and shoves it back under his pillow, "… doesn't matter. I'm an interloper. That's how you see me and I've made my peace with that."

"You are part of the family, I was actually gonna ask Shane if you could be Lilith's godfather."

"You mean that?"

"I mean it, there's no one I'd rather be Lilith's godfather, it would mean a lot to me if I could count on you to be there for her," Kirby pauses, wiping tears away from her eyes, "oh jeez, look at me, being the fool and crying over shit I shouldn't be crying over."

"Kirby, I'll be there for her every day. Every day you let me, and probably a few days you don't."

"It's taken me a long time to even trust Shane, but believe me when I say this, I trust you… can I put this necklace on you?"

He nods and bows his head, lifting his hair out of the way. She puts the necklace on him, kissing his forehead softly as she pulls him into another hug.

"I won't take him from you. And I won't take you from him." He assures softly.

"Thank you, I would pick you up and make you snuggle with me and Shane, but I am pregnant and he would tell me off for lifting you."

"Hell, I would too. That's my goddaughter in there." He smiles.

"C'mon you little blonde punk, come snuggle with me and Shane, you can talk to Lilith then."

"That sounds like a damn good time."

"We can have a group conversation with Lilith, even though she can't talk back, I'm gonna get some chocolate milk, maybe even some chocolate mousse too. Would you like some chocolate mousse, Shannon?"

"That sounds really nice, thank you."

"You go talk to Shane, I'll grab us the hoard of chocolate and then I will return, okay?" She asks, the French accent slightly heavier in her voice.

"I'll be ready and waiting."

Kirby messes with his hair before going to get as much chocolate as she can from the fridge.

Not quite certain in his actions, Shannon crosses the hall to the master bedroom, "I talked."

"Shane, hug him or I'll slap you in the dick." Kirby calls from the kitchen.

Helms pulls him into a tight hug, letting so much of the stress leave Shannon's body.

"Looks like I'm not banished." Shannon chuckles, a little wetly.

"You were never banished anywhere except from naked play." Helms murmurs, tucking Shannon's hair behind his ear.

Kirby returns with her hoard of chocolate, "he is gonna be Lilith's godfather and I will not take no for an answer, mon mari… also, we have a lot of chocolate."

"I was never planning on saying no. There's no one I trust more to take care of our girl if something happens to us."

"Good, now, we snuggle and eat as much chocolate as possible."

"I will have a chocolate food baby." Shannon declares, opening the first bar.

Kirby snuggles with the two men, keeping Shannon between herself and Helms, "you can talk to Lilith if you want to." She whispers as she opens a bottle of chocolate milk.

"Can I… can I touch your belly?"

"Yeah, go right ahead, she moves a lot when I'm relaxing."

Shannon reaches over and rubs a circle, "hey, kiddo. I'm your Uncle Shannon. Gonna be your godfather too. As long as your Mama decides I'm a good egg. Cause I think I am. And even if she doesn't, I'm still gonna love you."

"You are a good egg, wouldn't trust you if you weren't a good egg."

"Let's just hope you keep thinking I'm a good egg."

"Keep talking to the baby, both of you… Shaney boy."

"Well, me and your Daddy grew up together, more or less. I knew him when he was skinny and short."

"You were skinny and short too."

"You're both skinny and short."

"Hey!" Both men protest, grinning.

"Ooh, feisty… but I'm right, you're both skinny and short." She chuckles.

"Only compared to you. And I don't know if you noticed, but your boy is growing to be one-hundred percent pure Carolina beef." Shannon smiles, patting Helms' bicep.

"Just North Carolina beef though, Daddy Hurricane is pure North Carolina beef."

"Hardly any fat left on him anymore."

"His ass is still nice and fat though, I can still grab a handful of the booty."

"So I'm still a fat-ass?" Helms laughs.

"Yes, but only the ass." Kirby nods, blushing a light pink and realising what she's saying.

"I'm glad you like it." He grins.

"It's a damn fine ass, and you know it."

"Hell yeah I know it. I do more than plenty squats for it to be nice."

"What do you think of my ass, mon mari?"

"Think it's damn near perfect."

"Thank you, mon mari."

"Oh now you guys are just being mean," Shannon laughs through a mouthful of chocolate milk, "all this ass talk, and I can't even play with them."

"You can touch, just no sex, if it's alright with Shane."

"Yeah, it's alright with me."

"Feel free to grab a handful of the booty, we won't stop you… I just thought of something I consider really dumb but slightly funny."

"Mm, tell us." Shannon grins, reaching over to grab a handful of Helms' ass.

"Don't you two think it's weird how Matt's middle name is Moore and Shannon, your surname is Moore, spelt exactly the same way."

"Sounds like a conspiracy to me." Shannon laughs.

"First time I heard it I started questioning if he was a Hardy or a Moore, or perhaps both… it would be like if Shane's actual middle name was Hardy, he fits in with them so you'd question it, right?"

"You're right, that would have been weird."

"It would also be like if anyone had the middle name Roussimoff, because that can't be a first or middle name, and it would be awkward for me to meet them if I knew about it."

"What if we gave one of our kids that middle name?"

"You want to give one of our kids the middle name Roussimoff, are you sure?"

"Maybe. If we run out of goth names."

"If we run out of goth names, Shannon, do you think we'll ever run out of names?"

"I don't see it happening, but I also know how obsessed he is with your belly, so that might not be a question for me." Shannon teases, making Helms' cheeks go pink.

"Are you obsessed with the bely, mon mari?"

"Well, it was supposed to be something Shannon kept to himself…" he glares with pretend rage, "… but yeah. I guess you could say being around you has given me a… pregnancy kink."

"Two words no woman wants to hear together, pregnancy and kink, and no, I am not letting you constantly get me pregnant just so you can get off." She murmurs, slightly taken aback.

"Jesus, no, not what I mean!" He squeaks, "I just mean I'm enjoying your pregnancy now in ways different than I expected. I thought I'd just be getting you, but with bigger tits and a higher sex drive, but it's different than that. Sure, I like both those things, but seeing you become a mom… you've got a glow. That glow just… makes me happy. Maybe kink isn't the right word, because you are hot and looking at you does get me riled, but you always have. I guess it's more like… an emotional kink. One that'll be fulfilled every day you're a mom, which, God willing, will be every day for the rest of our lives."

"Ah, yeah, kink was the wrong word, my love, but I see what you mean, and if me being a mother makes you happy then feel free to enjoy it, after all knowing that you will be by my side throughout everything makes me happy, as does the idea of watching you with our kids."

"I don't know if it's a physical attraction or an emotional attraction, but Shannon's right; I really do like your belly. I just don't know if it gives me a penis boner or a heart boner."

"Hopefully the belly gives you a heart boner and my higher sex drive gives you a penis boner."

"I think that's it. That's probably it."

"The other way around makes me feel weird, cause our first baby is in there and I don't want to think about that giving you a boner."

"No, Lilith isn't the one giving me a boner. That'd be weird and if it ever happened, I need you to cut my nuts off with a rusty cleaver. What I do think it is is that your belly is round and soft, kind of like your tits, but lil Shane is easily confused by round softness."

"So lil Shane just goes off what he knows and that's usually just 'ooh, soft' and uses the same logic as with tits?"

"That's why I get so excited when the pancakes are really fluffy." He jokes.

"Lil Shane is just heavily attracted to soft things." She chuckles softly.

"I can't help it and neither can he."

"Would a nice soft blanket excite you?"

"… depends how soft."

"So technically the answer is yes."

"I guess, but no making fun of me for it."

"I won't, it just lets me know how I can get you riled up whenever I don't have the words to describe my love for you."

"I'm easily riled." He shrugs.

"I'm so glad you don't know how to instantly turn me on."

"I think I could figure out a way."

"If you do figure out a way to instantly turn me on, we'd never get out of bed."

"Well, I can always wiggle my lil fanny, try to get you going."

[ashtonisrottting]

[this is just useless venting, nothing relevant]

nana, do you remember how i heard this music in a looping after you died? i spent 5 months just listening to it and thinking about how I'd light up every single corner of this world so you wouldn't be in the dark, almost falling because you're as clumsy as i am –or, worse, looking for a sign that someone actually cared about you.

I'm very sorry for not being the granddaughter you wanted and I'm even more sorry for the person I've become but... maybe we could talk about it now?

[i thought about starting with all the bad things and then going with the good ones, but i think it's enough that i can acknowledge what these things are; i don't have to bother you with them] so... I'll do a list? it's more organized for me.

did you know i cut my hair? not I'm all curls and i love it! it's much lighter than strengthening it every weekend.

i don't wear rings anymore because my fingers are thinner, but I'm all bracelets and necklaces. (i kept the rings i got from you and i kept the heart necklace i found one week after you died. they're in my safe box now :))

i miss your cornmeal cake. i never ate it after you died. (and i never ate chicken soup and cassava broth ever again. it reminds me of you and how you puked all over the plate i handed you because the pills were making you feel bad; it's like being 12 all over again and feeling incredibly guilty for being the one that handed you that plate; i can't take it.)

i changed rooms and... your grandson, Icarus, he doesn't talk to me anymore. i think he hates my guts but that's alright; i hate his too.

I'm more quiet now and more... polite. people say I look much older and all i can think about is how young dancing with you, barefoot in your living room, made me feel. (i wish we could dance again.)

i hate dresses? and i don't wear nothing that is sleeveless. if you somehow know the reason, I'm sorry I'm not better than that.

i know how to cook and it really calms me down like nothing else. (i want to make cupcakes for you to try one day)

i graduated in highschool but i didn't go to prom. it was a small thing in the city's cinema and i just... people there didn't like me very much, y'know? I'd feel weird and i didn't have a suit to go.

there was no 15 birthday. it would be pointless if you weren't there. (i was only going to do something because you said you wanted to give me a ring and make sure I knew i could be a woman and you precious little girls forever)

I'm addicted to books? i think you'd find it funny the amount of paper and things i carry around because of them. i take notes of everything and I'm always sketching my thoughts... I'd like to share some of them with you.

i didn't learn how to comb my hair –I still have a heavy hand and I still pull out tufts of hair for lack of patience. I'd like to have you doing it for me. I'd teach you how to use every combing cream and I'd go to your house 3 days a week so you could do it for me.

I'd like to sleep by your side one last time to hear you breathing and snoring and mumbling incoherent things.

i want to hear you singing again and i need to hear your voice. i forgot about it nana. i forgot how you sound like.

I'm sorry I'm not the girl you wanted me to be. you deserved better.

I'm sorry for everything in general. i think things could've been better, y'know? i lost so much time with you. i never really thought you would be gone some day and I'd never taste your coffee or your cakes ever again. i was selfish and annoyingly... childish. i should've been smart enough to see that you're the only person in this family that's worth remembering. I'm sorry

I'm sorry, so sorry. i know you won't ever know these things because you're gone –youre not even a bag of bones at this point–, but I'd still like to apologize. i should've accepted your love back then –i should've known it was going to be the first and last genuine feeling anyone would be capable to have towards me

[jazz-miester]

There's something about you. Like sadness is tied to your soul.

Pairing: Ultra Magnus x Reader

Reader type: Gender neutral human

Song: Nfwmb-Hozier

Warnings: swearing

An: totally didn't make this as my phone is dying. Nope. Not at all. But hey. My first time writing for Ultra Magnus so let me know how I did!

I have been called many things in my life.

Terrifying.

Family.

Protecter.

Not once have I been called a romantic.

Not once has the word even been a thought in my vocabulary. But when I saw you. Gods when I saw you. My heart froze in my chest. My tongue stopped behind my teeth making me unable to speak.

You came into the base with an air that demanded respect. Your frame laced with it.

Teethed bared I greeted you. One of the only humans not to be slightly intimidated by you. Don't get me wrong. I'd lose my soul if I got on the wrong side of you.

But other than that. Not a drop of me believed the act you put on.

All power and respect. Absolutely no nonsense and by the books. Not leaving a t uncrossed and and I undotted.

You carried something else with you. Something I couldn't quite put my finger on.

And boy did I want to figure out what it was.

I spent my days with you. Learning all I could. Bit by bit I took down those walls. Each brick you played in my hands. Each with an unspoken "Don't break it. Don't break me."

I learned of your days as an enforcer on Cybertron.

I told you of my dedication in combat sports. Unwilling to let myself to become a victim once again.

You spoke of your favorite crystal gardens.

I gave you a singular acorn on a chain necklace. A little piece of home I brought to Jasper with me.

You brought me back down to earth. No longer did I just dive head first into anything. Didn't let my temper flare and roar it's ugly head.

I thought of you when my parents screamed and yelled at me. To cool myself down and speak calmly. To leave if I must.

It was your words that kept me from loosing it all after being wronged. Your words that kept me from doing what I regret most in my life.

I think I might of helped you to. Or at least I hope.

Your shoulders loosen. You smile a bit more.

You speak more freely to me.

Give me a little more of your soul.

That's when I notice it. Should have noticed it sooner.

The sadness that you carry.

I know that sadness all to well.

It's echoed in our hearts.

Etched on skin and metal.

It stitches together lips and bloodies tongues.

It's that of loss. Of anger. Of fear.

Ultra Magnus.

"Did you know your name literally means ultra great? It's latin." I threw this bit of information out into the air. The base was far to quiet.

You catch it. Almost smile.

"I did. It is why I stopped the translation there. It was the closest I could get to my actual cybertronian name." I laughed. Ribs aching.

"God! Does that like. Make you super badass or something? Ultra Great. Primus I love it." You do nothing more than shake your head and offer me that to rare smile.

You tell me a word I could not pronounce.

"What?" I ask.

"It is my name." You answered. I smile.

Then make it my life's duty to be able to day it.

When I managed it. Perfected it. Because I know how you are. All the lines must be straight. Every corner angled correctly. And every vowel properly pronounced.

I call out to you. Your name sweet on my tongue. Foreign and hard to wrap around.

But I do it.

All the swearing and frustration worth it to see your face light up. Smile pressed to your face in a way I couldn't describe.

Was it pride?

Honour?

Love?

I wish I knew. All of it just as foreign to me as your name.

It is when we are attacked I show a side to me I wish I never did. That I willed to stay hidden.

That sadness that you took and transformed into perfection. To pride. To stability.

I made into chaos. Anger. Regret.

He hurt you.

So I hurt him.

Fell back on old ways. Archaic and savage as my fists connected time and time again. Instead of being protected by wraps and padding it was armour and metal. My fingers didn't break but God when I saw that look on your face I wish they had.

I would have had to handle physical pain rather than the mental.

But what was I supposed to do? Let him hurt you.

The suit fell from my body the moment you were brought back to base. I couldn't bare to look at you. Afraid of what I might see.

"Y/n?" My named echoed in the empty base. Finally you were free of Ratchets care. "Y/n. Please. Look at me." I scoff. Regret etched in my skin as I look up at you. Finally seeing that God awful look.

"Why? So you can tell me to fuck off like everyone else in my life?" Your face fell. My heart broke."That's what I thought. Gods I was so fucking stupid." It's what cost me last relationship.

They got hurt. I hurt the person who hurt them.

And I was the monster.

"Y/n. Despite everything." You hesitated. My breath caught in my throat. You never. "Despite everything I still care for you. I. " You walked up to me. Every step calculated. Measured carefully.

"I thought you were going to be hurt, Y/n. That is why I was afraid. I have already lost one love in my life." Your hand gently grasps mine. Large and protective. A shield from all else.

"I am not ready to lose another. There is something about you." That hand comes up and brushes over my heart. Where your spark would lie in you own body. "Like sadness is tied to your soul. And perhaps. Together. We can be happy again."

Tears fall. My hands shake.

"Id like that. To be happy again. With you. Ultra Great."

Laughter rings through.

And I hope it is the only sound I will hear again from you.

[mrssimply]

The Fifth Element

HELLO DEAR @cyberpsycho-for-eurodyne! I AM GIDDY WITH EXCITEMENT, HENCE THE CAP LOCKS.

Alright, alright. *clears throat*

Not only it was a great and lovely surprise to be your Secret Santa, but your request sparked something inside me (as you can see). Probably when you asked about “I'd love an AU of another sci-fi ip” you imagined something like Startrek or Starwars, and I did consider those but then I had sort of an epiphany with the Fifth Element. To be fair, I’m not sure it’s even really a sci-fi movie, but once I had the idea I just couldn’t let it go, because as you know, I’m french, and this is the most American movie made by French people in existence so I thought it was perfect!

It was also the right occasion to give you two of your wished pairings in one go, though I’m sorry to say that Johnny is dead and stays dead in that one. The story is mainly about Kerry and V but you know my love for Johnny so I made him some space.

There are a bunch of things that you wished that I couldn’t include in that story, though I did try to work them into it. But I also wanted to keep that fairly simple. I hope it’s alright with you.

Lastly, you said “please have fun” and I DID. A LOT. And I hope you’ll too!!!

With no further comments, it's my pleasure to gift to you: The Fifth Element!

Like every year, Kerry is reminding the world about the death of his epic past love with Johnny Silverhand. Unbeknown to most is the fact that Johnny died in martyrdom at the hands of Arasaka to protect humanity’s secret weapon against The Great Evil.

And now, fifty years later, the last part of that secret weapon falls right into Kerry’s lap. The old rocker then finds himself tasked with guiding the weapon toward his goal of saving life itself. Easy as pie, if not for the fact that said weapon is literally the Perfect Being, and Kerry has very bad impulse control. What could go wrong?

Everything. The answer is everything.

And it starts like this:

Kerry was maudlin. He sighed forlornly as his fancy car hovered between the many layers of traffic. Under, above, and on the side, the traffic jam was pretty serious today. One would have thought that having flying cars and multilayered roads would end the phenomenon, but it seemed humanity always found a way.

The fog was particularly thick today, reflecting Kerry’s mood. The year touched the last week of August, and with it, Johnny Silverhand’s death anniversary. Fifty years later, it had become easier, like a scar that only pulled when the weather was bad. And just like a physical scar, this one also announced the return of depression. With time, it had become more and more manageable, because it seemed you couldn’t fight against wisdom anymore you could fight against age. But in both cases, Kerry had fought tooth and nail to prevent it, which was why, at nearly ninety, he looked something of an attractive and roguish forty-year-old man. Being a rockstar also meant he had a flair for the dramatic, so for the whole week surrounding Johnny’s death, he was dressed all in black whether he generally preferred lighter colors. He was wrapped in a long tank-top that reached his knees and flowed around his waist when he walked. Over it, he was wearing an ample sweater made of kashmir wool of the same color. Kerry absolutely loved the sensual feeling of the fabric over his naked skin as it fell over one naked shoulder, revealing his tattoo. For the pants, he had kept it simple, black jeans, and boots with small heels that clapped with every step. To complete the look, he was wearing his favorite pair of glasses: a large band that covered him from temple to temple. The only touch of color were his golden necklaces and chain, and the shimmering cyberware on his face and throat.

Every year, the gossip press had a field day with his mourning period, and Kerry liked to play the game, displaying all his mourning outfits like it was the Eurodyne Autumn Fashion Show.

Johnny would probably have hated Kerry for doing this, giving a spectacle of himself like this. But after seventy years in the business, and forty on the top tier list, dancing with the screamsheets was second nature. But his true feelings were so deeply buried Kerry wasn’t sure he could parse them anymore. He was a tomb prettily dressed.

The fact was, Kerry's mourning period also made sure Johnny Silverhand wasn’t fucking forgotten, because every damn year, the rockstar reminded the world of his epic love story.

After a while, the tale had morphed, turning into a star-crossed tragedy and not the shitstorm it really had been, with Kerry’s romantic notions and naïve expectations, and Johnny’s constant anger and trigger happy violence. They had fought at least as much as they had fucked, and hurt each other more than they had exchanged loving gestures. But now, they made movies about them. It was very cringe but Kerry secretly loved watching them.

Another sigh prompted Delamain, the piloting service AI, to ensure the well-being of its passenger.

“Would you like me to turn on the radio, to make your wait more agreeable, Mister Eurodyne?”

Kerry was on the verge of refusing but thought better of it. Staying alone with his thoughts might take him down such a dark road he would end up considering opening the door and jumping. Again.

“Why not. The Morro Rock station?”

“Of course, Mister Eurodyne,” Delamain replied politely.

“Call me Kerry… I’ve told you a million times,” he mumbled as the first rock song started over the high-quality speakers of the car, but the AI didn’t reply: it was against his protocols to grant such a request.

A ping on Kerry’s holodeck informed him that the meeting had been postponed an hour to allow him to reach the destination. Another ping informed him the jam was due to some chicken transport truck breaking down: the autolock system had failed and released chickens everywhere. Full-grown, enhanced, big as swan chickens. Under the fright, several cars had crashed, either AI-piloted or manually driven, resulting in a mayhem of epic proportions. The NCPD had closed the whole 3D zone and was trying to work out a bypass for the traffic. But as always with Night-City Police, it was going slow.

Kerry was about to ask Delamain to raise the volume when suddenly, something fell from the sky, right through the roof of the car and down on Kerry’s lap. It crushed him, slamming him against the door of the car.

Coughing and cursing as the pain of being nearly smashed registered, Kerry pushed back the thing blindly, fearing for a moment it was a swan-sized chicken, but when the dust cleared, it appeared it was just a man. A nearly naked man. He was only covered in a strange white shorty with one band going over the jut of each hip, and another larger band covering his torso. Thermobands, Kerry distantly registered. And then the man raised his head, and the rocker got a glimpse of his face for the first time. And lost his breath.

Continue reading here!

[turkisherlockian]

The Hat - Request [Benedict Cumberbatch x Reader AU]

Summary: Y/N is a young director who worked with and has a crush on Benedict Cumberbatch. He finds out that she used to write fanfictons about Sherlock and decides to give her a gift.

Word count: 1941

A/N: Happy birthday @shackleschains 🎂🎉❤️ I hope you like it! 😸

-----

''You never worked with Y/N before, have you?''

Benedict smiled and turned to Y/N. They developed a great friendship while working together, Y/N got on well with everyone and they all had so much fun.

''Yeah,'' Benedict said, ''I wish I met her earlier, though. She's a great director, she's energetic, magnetic, amazing...''

''Tell them something they don't know, Ben!'' Y/N nudged him and they all laughed, ''I'm just kidding...''

''No, seriously, that's what everyone thinks about you.'' He smiled.

''Aww... Thank you.''

''Alright, love birds...'' This made them both chuckle, ''So, Benedict, what was it like working with Y/N?''

''I had so much fun, it was great. She was great. She might be young,'' He grinned, teasing Y/N, ''But she has a brilliant mind and she's going to prove that in the film. Not that she needs to.''

The interviewer smiled as Y/N blushed, he turned to her, ''What was it like to work with Benedict?''

''You know, I'm known for my short films and this is my very first time directing a film, so I was really anxious because... Well, he is Benedict Cumberbatch!'' Benedict smiled as she continued, ''He's been very helpful, understanding... He's very clever! Just amazing. It was an honour to work with him, and I hope we can work together in the future, as well.''

''I hope that too, young lady.''

''I'm not that young!''

Benedict grinned, ''Yes you are, and that's great. You're a genius.'' He hugged her with his left arm, pulling her closer as she blushed.

''Well, turned into a complienting competition...'' Y/N grinned, ''Thank you so much. You're so kind.''

Benedict nodded with a smile, then turned to the interviewer who asked a question to Y/N again. ''We've been told that you're a Sherlock Holmes fan and you used to write fanfictions... Is that true?''

Y/N facepalmed as Benedict turned to her with a frown, ''Why didn't I know this?''

She pulled back, her cheeks burning. ''It's embarrassing!''

''No it's not!'' Benedict chuckled, ''It's adorable.''

Y/N rolled her eyes playfully, ''Alright... I was a huge fan. I wrote and read a lot, just like any teenager would do.''

''That's why it's not embarrassing, darling.''

''So...'' The interviewer interrupted them with a smile, ''You started filming things at a very young age, didn't you?''

''Yeah... I started with small things, really. I filmed my toys, my pets, making short clips, you know. Then I started filming nature and went to courses as I couldn't get accepted to a film academy. However, my short films got thousands of views overnight - which was crazy, and now here I am. And I'm so happy to be here.'' She smiled and turned to Benedict, which he replied with a comforting touch on her back.

The interviewer turned to Benedict, ''How would you describe your character, Benedict?''

Y/N couldn't focus on what he said as she watched him, he was beautiful. She could study his features as they were still so close to each other. His lips, eyes, eyelashes, beautiful skin and every single detail on it. She wanted touch him terribly.

''Y/N?''

''Huh? Sorry, I got distracted...''

''You must have been tired... Thank you for the interview, Y/N, Benedict, it's been fun!''

They shook hands as they got escorted outside, a car waiting for them.

Benedict got into the car after her and sighed, ''You're exhausted, aren't you?'' he asked with a smile.

''I am... How about you?''

''I'm shattered... As I'm old...''

Y/N chuckled, ''You're not old!''

Benedict shook his head with a grin, then turned to her. ''You'll get used to it. Interviews, fame, fans... Papparazzi and their cameras that follow you anywhere you go. But I need you to know that, Y/N, you're really good at your job. I didn't get the chance to say it properly earlier, but I really enjoyed working with you. I hope we do it again.''

She teared up quickly, feeling honoured. ''Thank you so much,'' she smiled, ''I feel the same way.''

Benedict nodded and smiled, squeezing her hand gently, ''I didn't say it to make you cry...''

''I know,'' She nodded and wiped her tears with her shirt's sleeves as the car got closer to the hotel. ''So... Are you free tomorrow?''

''Yeah. What for? I mean, doesn't matter why you asked, I just...''

He chuckled as the car stopped and he opened the door before getting out and giving her his hand. She took it with a smile as she sniffled, then got out of the car as well. ''Would you like to... Have dinner with me? In my room?'' He blushed, ''I mean, I have something to show you...''

Y/N nodded and smiled, ''I'd love that...''

They walked into the hotel together and got into the elevator. ''What time should I come?'' Y/N asked.

''I'll be back at around seven. How about seven thirty?''

''Sounds good...''

Silence filled the cabin as Y/N bit her lip, then it stopped and Benedict followed her outside. ''I'll see you tomorrow, then.'' He said with a smile.

''See you... Sleep well.'' Y/N smiled too and nodded, unlocking her room's door.

Y/N couldn't sleep, not at all. She kept thinking of what he was going to show her, what could it be? Also, she tried to avoid the embarrassment of the fact that she did write fanfictions and smut. People still knew even though she deactivated her account. And Benedict found out. He found out!

She was just a teenager, she had no idea that she could meet him one day, let alone work with him!

However, her eyes were aching and she was really tired, so she drifted off to sleel quickly.

-----

Y/N woke up to the sound of her phone, it was vibrating violently.

She sat up in horror and took it, unlocking it quickly. Y/N checked WhatsApp first to see what's going on.

Her friends texted her asking if Benedict and her were dating, the interview was posted on YouTube - that was surprisingly fast, and a photo of her looking at Benedict in love, was everywhere.

Y/N took a deep breath, everyone thought they were dating! Did Benedict know about it? If he did, how did he react? Would he be angry at her? No - she's done nothing wrong. Except for having a crush on him and looking at him like that...

She bit her lip and replied to her friends' messages, but didn't post anything online. She didn't know what to do, she didn't even have an agent or someone she could ask what to do. Maybe I could ask Benedict, she thought, but she was too embarrassed by the way she looked at him. What would he think? Did she ruin his reputation? Did he have a partner already? Y/N sighed and got out of the bed.

She put her phone away and turned it off.

Y/N had the whole day for herself until dinner if Benedict wasn't going to cancel it. She knew he wouldn't do such rude thing, but... She felt exposed. It was embarrassing. However, she wanted to look nice for him, so she spent an hour deciding on what she was going to wear. Y/N did her best to spend time, but there were still a few hours until dinner, so she turned her phone on and started reading what people think.

''I'll kill myself if they're not dating!!!''

''He's too good for her.''

''She looks so in love! I mean, who wouldn't?''

There were a few memes too, she was grinning and sending them to her friends before an unknown number called her. With hesitation, she picked up.

It was Benedict's PR team, asking her to not make a comment about the situation yet.

If his team knew, Benedict would know it too.

Thankfully, it was 6 PM and she could start getting ready. Y/N chose a white, puff sleeve and square neck summer dress and combined it with a chain necklace. She put on some makeup after getting her hair done, then checked her phone to see what time it was.

7 PM.

Time passed quickly as she tidied her room, and she put on her perfume before leaving her room right at 7:30.

Taking a deep breath, Y/N knocked on his door and smiled when he opened it.

Benedict couldn't take his eyes off her for a while, ''Hi, umm... Come in...''

''You look lovely...'' He said as he gestured her to take a seat.

''Thank you... So do you... Handsome, I mean. You look handsome. Not just right now, you always do, Oh God, please never compliment me again...'' Y/N blushed and covered her face with her hands as she sat down. Benedict chuckled, ''Thank you darling.'' He sat down in front of her, ''What would you like for dinner?''

Y/N hummed and shrugged, ''I don't know... You decide.''

''How about pizza? You love pizza.''

This made her smile. ''Sounds great.''

He got up to call for room service, then ordered her favourite. Y/N was fiddling with her fingers as Benedict came back, ''What's wrong?''

''Nothing... I mean, you heard about the rumors, didn't you?''

Benedict smiled, ''Do you really care about them? People always make assumptions.''

Y/N smiled too, Assumptions, she thought, but I do like you.

She sighed as he offered his hand. Y/N looked up at him in confusion. ''I'll show you something.'' Benedict said with a smile, then led her to the bedroom when she held his hand.

Y/N's heart was beating fast as she saw a gift box on the bed. Benedict picked it up and turned to her, ''This is for you.''

She was surprised, ''I... Why? I mean, it's not my birthday...'' Y/N chuckled mervously. ''You receive gifts only on your birthday? What a shame. Well, it'll change, darling. Now, open it.'' He said excitedly.

Y/N smiled and bit her lip, opening it. She looked up at him in shock, ''No.''

''Yes.''

She chuckled, can't believe her eyes. It was a deerstalker. The deerstalker that Benedict used, actually.

Tears welled up in Y/N's eyes as she put the box on the bed and took the famous hat out of it, touching it. She couldn't help but smiled as he spoke, ''I wanted to keep it after filming the last season.''

''This is the best gift I have ever received! Thank you!'' Y/N exclaimed as she hugged his neck on tiptoes, earning a chuckle from him and a warm hug back. ''You're welcome, sweetheart. I'm glad you liked it.''

Y/N pulled back but her arms were still on his shoulders, and she felt her cheeks burn as he looked into her eyes and then, at her lips. Y/N closed her eyes as she felt his soft lips on hers, feeling like she ran out of oxygen in a second. Benedict pulled back quickly for her liking, so she kissed him lovingly. ''I like you.'' she whispered, and then regretted it immediately. What if he told her he did not? It would break her heart.

However, Benedict grinned. ''I like you too.''

They kissed again and Y/N pulled back as someone knocked on the door. He let out a low groan, which made her wet, and then pecked her lips. ''It must be room service.''

Y/N nodded with a smile and followed him, the hat still in her hands. Benedict turned around with the tray to see her wearing it with a grin.

-----

After dinner, Y/N posted a selfie of them, her wearing the hat. Then they started reading comments together.

"He made her wear the hat!'' Someone commented, making a reference to Janine's words in the newspaper.

And in the end of the night, he did make her wear the hat.

---

Feedbacks are always appreciated! Thanks for reading, I hope you enjoyed it. ❤️😸 And you can turn on notifications if you want to know when I post a fic!

[generallybarzy]

hey there, stranger. i

SERIES MASTERLIST

summary: when you mention being lonely, Rebecca Seidenberg sets you- their babysitter- up on a blind date with Mat Barzal.

an: hi, i’ve been mia for a few days now due to some stuff, you all know what happened, but anyway here’s something to make my absence better! i know there might be some details that don’t make sense irl but just roll with it please I love the strangers to lovers trope so much. 

word count: 1.6k

Okay, you were lonely.

Ever since moving to New York for your first year of college, endless amounts of studying and work and more little jobs on the side to make ends meet living in the big city had taken up most of your spare time, leaving few opportunities for dating. Even when you did go on dates, they rarely lasted long enough to be called relationships, and not once have you had a serious relationship. This was your 20s, you were supposed to be out there living your life, weren’t you? Stupidly falling in love and getting your heart broken and learning along the way. But instead, you were busy trying to focus on that degree, leaving any hope of a love life behind.

Of course, there was nothing wrong with focusing on your degree, it was a degree you'd been looking forward to getting and you had been lucky enough to get accepted to your dream school, but it would be nice to have a significant other you could hold at the end of the day. Right? None of your many, many dates ended well, though, and though you were still young and didn't need to worry, you were lonely and felt late to the party as all your friends were falling in and out of love. It may have been dumb, but you were beginning to believe you’d never find the right guy.

And that’s where Rebecca Seidenberg stepped in to help.

She was a friend of your mom's and aunt's, and, though you didn't know her personally when you first moved out, word had spread through your family and to family friends, and she reached out to let you know that if you ever needed help in the big city, she would be there. She had been practically a mother figure to you since last year when you moved to New York all alone at 19 years old. She and her hockey player husband lived on Long Island with their children, just a quick commute from your city campus, and apparently, your mom had been in constant contact with her since your big move, checking in and asking someone to watch out for her little girl. You got a call one day asking if you needed any extra cash because, according to your mom, you were good with kids, and the two could use a babysitter for the night.

So, while you resided in a dorm room in the city and worked on campus between classes, you spent a lot of your Friday nights and weekends out on Long Island babysitting for the Seidenbergs when they went out on date nights.

They all quickly came to love you, especially the children, and you found it worth it to spend your weekends with them rather than out on any shitty dates or getting drunk at some stupid, dangerous frat party like a lot of college students. You loved their family, you loved all the genuine love, and could only hope that one day you'd have a relationship with that much love in it. You didn't like to admit how much you wanted a boyfriend, maybe it had something to do with your own insecurity, but you didn't want to think you needed a man. Maybe it had something to do with your fears, too. You didn’t want to get messed up again. You didn't need a man, but how great would it be to have someone there at the end of the day to curl into and rant to and love? It would be amazing. Okay, maybe you were a hopeless romantic. But you’d never admit it.

But about a month ago, as Rebecca was talking to you about a date Dennis was taking her on next week, you were feeling particularly romantic and hopeless. Your second year in college had just started up again, and you had returned to New York from your hometown to settle back into your lonely dorm room. All your friends were either meeting up with their partners after spending the summer apart, or dealing with the loneliness of having to be separate from them for the upcoming year, but you had nobody like that, and just let it slip.

"I wish I could find a guy who loves me like that." You lamented after commenting on how the Seids looked at each other with absolute heart eyes. "It's starting to feel like I'm just destined to be alone."

"What?" She looked at you incredulously, laughing a little as if she couldn't believe you hadn't found anyone. "You're still young, you have plenty of time!"

"Yeah, realistically I know, but I've been on so many dates, and none of them are ever successful.” You groaned, maybe a little dramatically as you thought back to all the dates you’d had since moving out of your parent’s house last year and coming to New York. “And all my friends have, like, solid relationships, or are at least messing around, and I can’t even do that. I feel so far behind.”

“There’s no timeline on love.” She spoke wisely, like the motherly figure you’d been missing. “You’re not falling behind. Anyway, the chances of you meeting the love of your life this young are pretty slim.”

“I know, and I’m not looking for the love of my life. Just… someone, you know?” You thought for a moment, just of having someone to smile with, to hug and to kiss after a hard day. You hadn’t had a true boyfriend since your last year of high school, and that hadn’t ended well. You had fallen hard for the wrongest person in the world, and he had done nothing but hurt you for months. It had definitely messed you up a bit, but you wanted nothing more than to forget about that whole ordeal and come out of your shell again, to love again. “I don't know if I'm being too picky or my standards are too high or something, but I just attract the wrong types of guys."

"Hmm." She gave it thought for a moment, and you knew she was going to work some of her motherly magic. "Well, what are you looking for?"

"I don't know. Just someone who's genuine? Someone who's really passionate and has a big heart. And funny, the guys I date always have the blandest humor and it makes dates so awkward and I'd have to force laughter. Someone who actually cares. I don't think that's too much to ask for, is it?"

"It's definitely not." She laughed for a moment. "I actually know someone who fits in those categories really well."

"Really?"

"If you'll let me, I think I could get him to go on a date with you."

"No, no way, blind dates aren't my thing."

"What's your thing? Dating apps?" You laughed at the playful chirp, but unfortunately, it was true. "Come on, I know it'll go well, even if you don't end up together. He's a great guy!"

"Alright, fine!" You laughed a bit, at both how excited she was and how excited you were to meet this guy she spoke so highly of. "It better be worth it."

"Trust me, you'll love him."

And that's how you ended up here, sitting all alone in the corner of a little coffee shop in Brooklyn, fiddling with the strings coming loose at the sleeves of your oversized sweater. It had been getting chillier out in the past few October weeks, and even though it was cozy and warm inside, you kept your sweater on for comfort, so you had something to fidget with and calm your nerves.

You were so nervous, you were overthinking everything you were doing. Were you dressed okay? Jean, a cute turtleneck with a loose sweater thrown over top, a cute little necklace- too casual? Not casual enough? Was your hair a wreck? You’d thrown it up in a cute bun but had it become a wreck since you walked here through the breeze? Your makeup was simple, but had it covered up the fact that you’d been breaking out due to the stress of your recent surge in classwork? You had already ordered a drink but immediately rethought it. Was it rude to order before he showed up?

As much as you trusted Mrs. Seidenberg, you couldn’t help the nagging feeling that this date would go horribly. He would be here any minute, you were sure of it. You could feel it.

And you were right.

The door to the coffee shop rattled open and in stepped a man who quickly drew your attention away from everybody else. In dark jeans, a tee, and a nice-looking black bomber jacket, he didn’t really stand out, but there was something about him- his aura, the way he held himself, that made him so appealing. That immediately drew your eyes to him. He had dark hair that looked soft to the touch and made you want to run your fingers through it, and his brows were furrowed above searching eyes as he looked around the room, making you think that maybe he was looking for someone. Maybe he was looking for you. Maybe it wasn't too much to hope that this man was your blind date. And the moment his eyes fell on you- the only person sitting all alone in this cafe- your eyes locked. Only then did you realize you’d been staring. His eyebrows quirked up a little bit and you saw a little smile start to pull at the corners of his lips. As he approached your table, you realized your prayers were answered.

He moved in long strides, almost gracefully towards you, and you were so mesmerized with how he approached you that you almost missed his beautiful voice when he spoke to you.

"(Y/N)?"

Breathless, you smiled. "Hey there, stranger."

[hot-wiings]

It's My Birthday :)

The One Where Your Used To Getting Neglected On Your Birthday Due To It Being So Close To Christmas.

Edited: 12-13-2020

You didn't know what you expected. Upon waking up you had immediately checked your phone. You had thought there might've been something, anything. A sign that somebody remembered or cared. A sign that your life had left a significant impact on someone. A sign that you mattered. Per usual, like every year, there was nothing.

After setting your phone down on your bed, you scrambled to get dressed in your UA school uniform before you picked your phone back up and made your way downstairs to the kitchen. Your parents didn't give you much thought or attention as you settled down in a chair across from them and poured yourself a bowl of cereal.

You waited to see if your parents would say something about the day. Something, anything. You had thought that perhaps, even if your friends didn't remember and send their best of wishes, your family would've at least remembered. They didn't, they never did. Instead of even trying to say something that you incite them to remember you began to eat your breakfast in silence, watching your parents talk to each other about how they were going to afford Christmas gifts this year.

"[Sibling Name] wants an iPad."

"Those are really expensive, how are we gonna afford it?"

"I don't know. She didn't even ask for it, she said she was gonna ask Santa for it because she didn't think we could afford it. Santa has to bring one now."

"We'll both have to pick up extra shifts. We'll manage. We always do."

You bit your lip as you heard your parents stress about money. You knew your parents had a hard enough time managing to scrounge up money for Christmas gifts, you didn't need to burden them by making a fuss over your birthday. Rarely did you get presents on your birthday, and scarce was cake, just the words happy birthday would be enough. It was enough to make you were content. You just wanted to be acknowledged. Acknowledged, and appreciated on the one day a year you should have the right to receive it.

"Can one of you give me a ride to school?"

Your mother hesitated before looking at the clock on the stove, shaking her head adamantly back and forth, she gave you a non-verbal no.

"No, it's too far, we'll be late for work. You'll have to walk, if you leave now you can get there on time."

You sighed, upset that you had to walk through the horrendous weather on your birthday, as you quickly slurped down your cereal milk and bolted to slip your snow boots and jacket on. After you tightly tied your scarf around your neck you grabbed your house keys and made your way to the door.

"Bye, I love you both."

They didn't respond, and you tried not to be bothered. They had busy lives. They had to provide for you and your siblings, not to mention somehow create a great Christmas. They couldn't always remember your birthday. They couldn't always drive you to school. They didn't always have time for you. You couldn't be selfish, you understood that, but it still hurt. You closed the door and made your way to UA. The cold winter air making you shiver as you slowly made your descent.

"[Y/N]! [Y/N]! Wait up!"

You had barely heard the soft voice of a girl yelling out to you. It was so soft, barely above a whisper, but slowly getting louder. You could pick her voice out of any loud crowd. It was the voice of someone who always brought a smile to your face, the voice that made your heart palpitate and beat faster. The voice of your crush, the voice of your friend's girlfriend.

Your steps faltered and you turned your head to see Ochako Uraraka running after you. Her short brown hair flew around her and her cheeks were rosy as ever from the cold as she sprinted to you. She grabbed onto your coat, nearly pulling you to the ground as she began to slip on ice. You grabbed her hip and waist to help steady her, though it was cold and you both couldn't tell, there was a blush settled on both your faces before you quickly pulled your hands away, letting her stand independently.

"Good morning."

"Good morning and happy birthday!"

She giggled the sentence out, and the blush stayed on your face as a beaming smile took over your lips. You avoided her eyes and played with your hands nervously. Of course, the one person to remember would be your friend's girlfriend. Your friend's girlfriend, whom you, guiltily, yearned for. She remembered your birthday. She remembered you. Sadly, regrettably, it brought you great joy.

"Thanks, wanna walk to school with me? Or were you waiting for Izuku?"

"Nope! I remembered you mentioned you walk to school, and I wanted to walk with you. It's your birthday, after all, you shouldn't be lonely."

You walked with the bubbly girl down the sidewalk, avoiding the more frozen spots and avoiding the heavier parts of snow. Ochako, slipped her hand into yours, trying to create warmth and making your heart skip a beat. She shouldn't be holding you like this, she's dating Izuku, your friend. You should've pulled away, but you couldn't. She kept her hand there until you reached the gates of UA.

"I got you something."

"Really?"

Your words drowned on her ears as she stopped walking and rummaged through her old school bag with nervous shaking hands to find the box she wrapped up pretty for you. She thrust it into your hands with a pink face.

"Seriously, Ochako, you didn't have to. I don't need a gift..."

"[Y/N]. You have to accept it. I got it just for you."

You kicked the snow as you took a deep breath. Did you want the gift? Yes. Did you need the gift? No. You shouldn't get gifts for your birthday, it was just placed in an unfortunate time of the year. It was a fate you accepted. You wanted to accept your pretty friend's gift, but it didn't feel right. The lingering feelings you felt for her when she had a boyfriend wasn't right. It wasn't right, it wasn't fair.

"I-I know how stressful money can be around the holidays, you can return it, get something for Izuku for Christmas. He's your boy-boyfriend isn't he?"

"What? No! Izuku's my best friend."

As another giggle graced your ears you grinned. You couldn't lie that hearing her say those words brought joy to yourself. For so long you'd thought they were together. They ate lunch together, studied, sparred. They were practically attached at the hip, you were sure she was dating him. The knowledge that she could only ever be your friend hurt. Hearing her say the opposite was your ecstasy.

"Hey, I thought I was your best friend."

You teased her and she let out a little nervous laugh as you started to carefully peel off the wrapping from the gift, not wanting to ruin what looked so carefully put together with a bow. Your heart pounded with curiosity as she watched you intensely to see your reaction. You pulled out a gold necklace with a small gold ball on the end from the box and gasped in shock. It looked so expensive, by far the most regal gift you'd ever received. Ochako must have saved a fortune to get this.

"Ochako... This is so pretty, this must have been so expensive."

"It, uh, it opens too."

She ignored your statement of questioning that it must have been expensive as she murmured out her words. It was expensive, she saved and saved, and even borrowed money from Momo Yaoyorozu. You opened up the gold ball and pulled out a little piece of paper with her handwriting scrawled out.

I like you, like a lot.

"I was hoping we could be more than best friends."

"I'd like that, like a lot."

You grabbed Ochako's hand, guilt-free this time, and walked into UA together. It didnt matter that everyone forgot your birthday, it didn't matter that you never got gifts or a birthday cake. It didn't matter because it mattered to Ochako. It didn't matter because you received the best gift from Ochako.