#and we have an A list celebrity talking about that and your response is to intentionally misinterpret it ?? and say she’s fatphobic???

[slyscoutess]

BLOUKOUT || FORMULA 1

I think we're all chronically online enough here to know what's going on, and rightly so, on TikTok right now, but don't worry, if for some reason you've been in a cave the last few days and haven't heard , let me explain everything with such precision.

In recent days, the Met Gala 2024 was unveiled, and with it celebrities from all lists came together with a single cause, to put themselves in the spotlight with exaggerated clothes and a ticket more expensive than yours and my life. Among these was the influencer hayleyybaylee, an American influencer who thought it would be wise to record, edit and publish a video with her exaggerated clothes, heading to a dance that only the elite within the biggest elites have the right to go to, in the audio of the video? a line that is certainly historically excruciating.

while Rafah, the only theoretically safe place, or at least that was what had been promised to the Palestinian people, was being completely bombed, Hayley was publishing a video with the audio of Marie Antoinette: “let them eat cake”. If you, like me, are a history lover, you know well the episode in history that the French people lived from then on.

With the memory of this audio, we reclaim our power as the people in control, we gave these people the platform and from these people we can take the platform away at any time we want. If the government and the rich are not giving their time to those in need, we will need to force their gaze in the direction we want.

Here we have a term: the people for the people.

because it's literally all we have.

with that, we brought our guillotines outside and decided to take from them what they don't know how to use; their voices and their platforms. blokout2024 is a line that anyone can participate in, the best way to help is to share lists and that includes your own, but it was bothering me how there were names that never appeared there, the formula 1 drivers.

These playboys who spend the year doing Vrom Vrom don't pay attention to anything that doesn't affect them and this was seen with the whole Christian Horner harassment case and some of the reactions to this case. It's time to demand some responsibility from them, they are not babies, they are not children, they are men who are always ready to defend harassers and say that they respect racists and criminals.

“but love, boys can't talk about it” Sir Lewis Hamilton, as always and once again, proved that they can. the man continues to publish links and news about Palestine, and this is not recently, and we know that when Lewis makes donations, he is not in the habit of taking a stand on them, just as he recently did for the Brazilian people with the case of Rio Grande do Sul, the other pilots and their partners just don't care. not to mention the teams and their bosses. This even affects the Formula 1 Academy, with Charlotte Tilbury as a sponsor and frequently in the paddock, for those who don't know, Charlotte recently fired Bella Hadid, a Palestinian woman, for protesting and continuing to speak about the country of her blood and family.

remembering that there are convinced Zionists within the paddock, such as Lance Stroll's girlfriend, sister and brother-in-law, the latter is also Daniel Ricciardo's best friend. Tell me who you hang out with and I'll tell you who you are.

I'm not here telling you to stop liking your favorites, I'm not here telling you to stop watching the races, I love some of these and it will hurt me to block them, but not as much as it hurts me to know that they close their eyes and remain quiet in all their luxury, I'm here saying that we need to demand a position from these men and women, we were the ones who gave them the platform, how many people in Palestine can be fans of these people who ignore their suffering on a daily basis? so keep writing fanfics, follow the gossip pages, but the officials need to take a stand

If even the swifties are doing it, why can't we do it?

Let’s Start Big:

BLOCK

FIRST HALF || SECOND HALF

HONORARY MENTION

LN4 |

LN Rancing Kart |

Lando JPG |

Lando Movie |

Quadrant |

Max Fewtrell |

Lec |

F1Academy |

Nico Rosberg |

Romain Grosjean |

Jenson Button |

Kimi Räikkönen |

Sebastian Vettel |

Mick Schumacher |

Magui Corceiro |

Ollie Bearman |

Liam Lawson |

James Vowles |

Bianca Bustamante |

Sky Sports F1 |

Zak Brown |

Christian Horner |

CS55 Racing |

Arrow McLaren |

1 paper cut doesn't really hurt, but 28 million paper cuts can kill you. Let's fucking hit the pentagon, only follow trought fan accounts.

We, the damned of the earth, have only each other. And that will be enough.

[just-rogi]

Some Fatphobia activists see someone having a conversation about restrictive ED’s and somehow make about themselves. ED survivors have a hard enough time coming out and talking about it publicly- Without having people shout that they are fatphobic for talking about it (as If plus sized people can’t also have restrictive Ed’s ???)

[menlove]

like yes "from the river to the sea" is not antisemitic and neither is protesting "jewish businesses" if that business happens to be a weapons manufacturer

but yall seem to think that those two things are the only things people are talking about when we say leftists are being antisemitic rn

like sure fine that's great! but are you

spreading antisemitic conspiracy theories (ie "israelis are stealing unborn babies out of palestinian women and burning them/eating them/using them in xyz ways" w 0 backup yes I've seen that)? connecting absolutely everything to zionists and saying they run the world/media/banks? making random connections to this situation w no proof? (just saw someone say puerto rico getting rid of its stray cat population "has ties to 🍉" like yall need to get serious)

are you saying "idk I just can't trust anyone wearing a star of david now like at this point the star of david is basically a swastika :/ you shouldn't use it"?

are you responding to the list of celebrities who support israel with "well this isn't surprising, hollywood is jewish"?

are you saying israel and every israeli should be destroyed? not "from the river to the sea" or that israel shouldn't exist as a state but I've seen multiple popular leftists saying "idc if the entire place gets bombed and everyone dies" like you realize that includes innocent civilians and people protesting their government and non-jews as well right? like you are advocating for genocide in response to genocide and at this point yall just want more violence, not justice.

are you saying antisemitism isn't a real problem anymore? or like everyone's favorite celebrity rn susan sarandan said "now jews know what muslims feel like" as if antisemitism and islamphobia don't go hand in hand? are you saying antisemitism is a "sad interpersonal problem but not systemic"? are you saying that during the holocaust the jews should have found an alternative to israel (true) by "civil resistance" implying that no jews resisted during the holocaust and that the holocaust was somehow the fault of the jews for not doing enough for themselves? are you saying that anyone bringing up your antisemitism rn needs to shut up bc "it's not about you" because you can't comprehend that people can care about multiple things at once?

are you asking every jew you meet where they stand on palestine and accusing every single jew you disagree with about literally anything of being a zionist? are you calling jews zionists who are just scared of rising antisemitism rn? are you using "zionist" as a placeholder for "jew" bc you can immediately say you're talking about zionists and not jews even if the post has nothing to do w zionism and only judaism?

are you agreeing with and marching with nazis and white supremacists and not realizing?

are you making jews afraid to attend pro-palestine protests because they're getting harassed? and yes this happens at pro-israel protests too but this is a post aimed at pro-palestine leftists bc I am one and that is my audience

are you acting, in general, like the actions of a shitty government and shitty people equate to the beliefs of every single jew on earth? are you making posts comparing judaism to christianity bc of this? saying jews have a history of violence and conquest on par w christianity when it's quite literally just israel and in the rest of history for the last SEVERAL THOUSAND YEARS jews have been anything BUT a world power? do you not hear the parallels to antisemitic conspiracy when you insist on this? outside of israel, what instances can you think of where judaism has been a historically violent and oppressive religion? spoiler: it's not, israel is the baby of colonial interests and thus follows their pattern. it's not because of judaism

are you tolerating and okay with people shouting blatantly antisemitic things at jewish people bc they're shitty people? like think of it this way would you be fine w a bunch of straight people shouting "faggot" at a white gay republican? or a racial slur at a republican of color? would either of those things be fine? no? then aiming actual blatant antisemitism at a zionist is not okay either. you can shout all manner of things at them that don't involve antisemitic phrases, remarks, and threats.

[povlnfour]

ੈ✩‧₊˚ END UP HERE (LN4)

pairing: lando norris x f!reader

summary: a night out, a long walk home, and a pretty stranger happy to accompany you.

word count:

content warnings: mentions of alcohol/being tipsy, not proof read bc authors dyslexia won

“how did we end up talking in the first place?” — end up here, 5 seconds of summer

“do you even know who that is?” was the first thing your friend had said when she dragged you away from the group gathered around you by the bar.

of course you didn’t know the names and faces of the all people who scattered the club. all you knew was that this was one of the hottest places in monaco, and it’s guest list bolstered some giants of the motorsports world, a fact you were well aware of before agreeing to join your friends for the night. the group were ecstatic to have received a private invite to such an exclusive place from one of your more grander friends, the prospect of mingling with celebrities certainly playing on their minds — but you were more bothered about trying as many cocktails on the long menu that the place offered.

what you hadn’t expected was to be a point of attraction the moment you walked in. you knew you stood out in here, dressing nothing like the celebrities and trust fund babies you mixed with, but you certainly didn’t anticipate this drawing people towards you.

a man had approached you as you ordered a round for the small collection of friends you had come with, asking for your name. wanting to pay no mind to potential suitors, you told him trouble, before a sharp tug on your arm to drag you back towards the dance floor (drink now in hand) had you being reprimanded by your friend.

“am i meant to?” you hissed close to your best friend’s ear, straining to be heard over the baseline.

“you’re hopeless.” she had groaned, swiftly merging back in with the other girls in attendance. the group was growing with every hour, the alcohol running through people’s veins allowing for more socialising with strangers.

the music blared on, and you suddenly realised you weren’t half as drunk as you had intended to be. there was a nice buzz below your skin, one that danced through your fingertips and let you lower your guard on the dancefloor, but it was clear you’d remember everything in the morning (which wasn’t your initial intention).

with a swift glance around the room, you caught the eye of a handsome stranger. his face was recognisable, but not enough to put one of the aforementioned names to the sight. he was most likely another driver, as you recognised a few of his friends that milled to one side from the television.

the pretty stranger sent you a wink from where he lazed against a wall, your eyes grazing down his arms to the small glass of presumably whiskey he was nursing. you may have done something stupid, approached him on a whim, if it weren’t for your friend grabbing your arm once again and dragging you back into the action.

your bold decision had been interrupted, but it didn’t stop you from putting on a show. you were suddenly aware of the eyes following every move, ensuring that each roll of your hips was perfectly in his eyeline.

a few drinks more, and a lot of dancing later, people began to file out with each passing minute. one of the friends you had originally attended with left with a man she had met that night, another leaving to get food with a group you had met on the dancefloor, until it was just you and two others from the initial gang left. there were quite a few people fluttering around still, clearly determined to stay until doors closed.

you were tired by now, more than ready to call it a night despite the adrenaline still flowing through you. it was more that stage of just drunk enough that you could keep going if you wanted to, but sober enough to be somewhat responsible.

well, somewhat responsible.

when your remaining friends had expressed their interest in moving to a different club, you had politely declined the invite to join. it took some convincing that you’d be okay walking home to your apartment on your own, but once they were thoroughly convinced, they bid you adieu and left you alone.

alone, bar the presence of a certain handsome stranger still hovering in the guest area.

he was flanked by some of the same people from before, the crowd having dwindled enough that it no longer looked impenetrable. you recognised two of the men from the group who had approached you at the bar, confirming your suspicions the brunette from before was involved in racing one way or another. if you had half a sense, that information would have made you turn back and rethink your decision.

you were too far into your master plan now (also known as: not sober enough to make fully calculated decisions), and you knew what you wanted.

so with shoes noticeable tighter on your feet than they were at the beginning of the night, you took a heavy stride towards the collection of people chatting amongst themselves.

before you had even breached the small collection of chairs that held the strangers friends, they all seemed to notice your arrival and disperse as though commanded, leaving only you and your target. you barely had to look up to know his attention was all on you at the moment, and the alcohol in your system brought out an involuntary giggle at the thought of keeping him hanging all night.

“hello, trouble.” he spoke breezily, accent a lot more british than you were expecting.

“glad to know that got around.” you grinned, stopping just a foot ahead of him, distance close enough that he could touch if he really wanted to “wan’a keep calling me that, or should i put you out of your misery?”

the stranger was even more tanned up close, skin smooth and glowing under the club nights. his cheeks stretched with a smile under your attention, and you couldn’t help but mimic the action. “i could think of a few other things to call you, but your name would be nice”

“y/n.” you offered, taking the drink out of his hand and downing the remaining drop as a form of payment.

he laughed lowly, accepting the now empty glass back without batting an eyelid. “lando.”

“well, lando. it would appear all my friends are gone, and i have no one to walk me home,” you put on your best pout, jutting one hip out to the side to really emphasis just how distraught you were over the turn of events “care to do the honours?”

lando didn’t bother pretending to dwell it over, instead pushing himself off of the wall in one smooth action, and offering you an arm to lead. you took it gladly, expecting him to at least offer a goodbye to his friends. to your surprise, he did no such thing, leading you to an exit you certainly didn’t recognise.

when the fresh air hit you, your body relaxed in relief, entirely unaware just how stuffy the large yet crowded club had been for most of the night. the silence in the roads around your exit told you that lando had most likely guided you towards the back door of the club, a much easier escape into the main streets of monaco without the fear of the crowds. yet another sign he must be someone important. if you thought about it enough, you recognised his name from the world of motorsports, but you couldn’t entirely place him.

you didn’t care to ask for now, way too focused on tearing the heels off of your feet to feel the cold ground below. dangerous, yes, but well worth the relief you gained from the relief of release from such terrible choice in footwear.

glancing back at lando, you found him watching in amusement, leant against the doorframe with an eyebrow raised.

“i didn’t plan to be out this late.” you defended before he had even said anything.

lando raised his hands in a defence of his own “no judgement here. you were certainly putting in a shift on the dancefloor.”

humming, you began to step along the curb side that started your route home, passing lando a glance over your shoulder. “i knew you were watching.”

“yeah? putting on a show?” lando caught up with you despite your head start, probably made a lot easier by the fact you were practically pigeon stepping along the pavement, playing around with your own balancing skills. he was able to make up ground rather quickly.

the bars and casinos that littered the streets around you were still open and bustling, the bright lights of monaco all blurring together by now. you noticed a few cars go by, ones you didn’t recognise but could certainly admire, and it seemed your new friend was doing the same.

“yup!” you exclaimed, pointing down a street that held some of the now closed cafes “this way.”

lando turned easily, his hand coming up to rest on your waist as the stones dug into your heels and you stumbled as a result. you steadied yourself with a determined got it, but weren’t deterred at all — if you wanted to walk like this, you were going to walk like this!

… a thought that only lasted a few more seconds as you got fed up of such a slow pace. you took to skipping instead, hopping slightly in front of lando and turning to face him. you could see the amusement on his face mix with a certain fear, most likely over the fact you weren’t looking where you were going. you swung the hand up with your heels in it as you spoke again, narrowly missing hitting yourself in the face. “i like your shirt!”

lando laughed, quickening his pace to close the gap, and gently engulfing your hand in both of his. you were just about to ask him what he was doing when he cleverly dislodged your heels from your grip and took them himself. you would have pouted, poked fun at him not wanting to hold your hand, had he not slipped his spare one into yours, pulling both of your arms back to your side and leading you down the roadside facing the right way this time.

“boo,” you shoved at his shoulder ever so slightly “i thought you’d be more fun than this mr. lando.”

like anyone would with a petulant child, lando grinned and pushed you away, pulling you back suddenly via your fingers that were intertwined. the action made you squeal, gripping on to his shoulder when you returned to his side. you frowned at him, no real weight in the action, but it was worth it for the reaction when he poked the tip of your nose with a wide smile.

“you’re certainly living up to your nickname, trouble.” he added, and you began to swing your conjoined hands between your bodies, a pep in your step that he happily mimicked.

you giggled, pulling yourself back to briefly bury your face in the crook of his neck, cheeks heating up at the memory of what you had done tonight. “i’m so sorry to your friend who i entirely pied at the bar.”

lando laughed again, this time full bellied and hearty. you could feel him shaking his head in amusement, glancing up from where you hid your face to find him already smiling at you. “don’t be. george needs humbling.”

you stopped walking suddenly, face gone pale as you realised who that man had been, and why your friend was so shocked. lando got the memo, stopping in concern and prepared to help you out of any hypothetical crisis. “please do not tell me i told george russell my name was trouble, and ditched him at the bar.”

there was a beat of silence for just a second, lando keeping his composure, before he suddenly doubled over in violent shakes of laughter. you whined in instinct, pleading with him that it wasn’t that funny, but eventually humour won and you joined him in his joy.

“oh my god my friends are never going to let me live this down!” you shouted, leaning on his hunched over body for support.

you were getting a few looks from passersby, probably confused at to why two young people were practically keeled over in the middle of the busy streets in the early hours of the morning. it was funny, really, you hadn’t even noticed just how busy the streets around you actually were as others made their way home. you had been so transfixed on the man beside you for most of it.

“that’s— oh my god i’m not letting him live this down.” lando chuckled, slowly gaining his composure once more as he straightened up. you didn’t miss the way he had to wipe tears from his eyes, and you thought briefly you wouldn’t mind making him laugh like that again.

“well, now i’ve embarrassed myself thoroughly…” you began, lando grinning as he smoothly linked your hands back together and continued the route down the road, counting on you for guidance as to the direction of where you were staying.

you hummed to yourself as you kept walking, a tune that you had heard in passing at the club that night. lando recognised it almost instantly, head turning to look at you with a raised eyebrow “bon jovi?”

you smacked your lips together “is that who is by? i only know like three lyrics. something about living on a prayer.”

“that’s the one.” he smiled again, and you couldn’t help but notice the slight tooth gap that made his grin so adorable.

whilst this wasn’t the way you had initially seen your night going, you wouldn’t complain about being looked at like that. it was surprisingly easy to talk to the man, despite his obvious status and the fact that he was most likely famous. he hasn’t made you feel out of place, and it made you want the night to keep going.

so when you stopped in front of your hotel, building towering over you, there was a surprising ache in your chest that this could be it.

“well, this is me.”

lando looked just as disappointed as you, clearly hoping the jaunt would be longer. he didn’t fret, simply offering to walk you inside so that he could be sure you got in safe. you both knew he could simply watch you walk through the doors and be fine — what with the establishments security and all — but it was clear neither wanted the journey to end just yet.

you accepted, not one to turn down more time spent with a pretty person, and it was only when you called the elevator that you began to say your goodbyes.

“well, thank you for, uh, walking me home.” you shuffled, watching as the numbers decreased on the led screen to indicate the lift was getting closer.

“thank you for making my boring night a lot more interesting.” lando retaliated, hands slipped in the pockets of his jeans to feign nonchalance.

the telltale ding of the elevator doors opening made your heart drop. perhaps it was the remaining alcohol in your system despite how much you had sobered up by now, but a certain bravery was lingering.

“i’m gonna wonder where this boldness came from in the morning.” you started, barely registering the confused expression on lando’s face before you pulled him down and crashed your lips together.

lando reacted instantly, hands wrapping around your waist as your own tangled in the curls at the bottom of your neck. the heels he held in one hand collided with your body at the impact but you paid them no mind as he confidently walked you back into the elevator until your back was pressed against the large mirror. he wasted no time in pushing your bodies together, using his strength to tug your waist against his as he reluctantly broke the kiss, still remaining close enough to whisper against your skin, “what floor?”

“seven.” you responded, kissing him again within milliseconds of finishing. you could feel his hands fumbling around on the buttons, helplessly searching for your floor without turning his head before the doors closed and you were finally away from the prying eyes in reception. you had certainly given security a show.

that would be an embarrassment for the morning, for now you were significantly more focused on the way lando’s hands traced the curve of your ass. he gave a firm squeeze that had you gasping into his mouth, an action he took perfect advantage of.

any vertigo the elevator moving upwards may have brought you was grounded by the firm hold on your body and the tongue slipping into your mouth. he tasted vaguely of whiskey, dulled throughout the night, and you found yourself getting addicted to the feeling of his mouth of yours. you may have done something more scandalous right then and there had the lift not drawn to a stop and the doors beeped open.

the two of you turned, being met with a giant FLOOR 8 ahead of you — and that was when you lost in once more.

leaning on lando, you couldn’t help the uncontrollable giggles that slipped from your mouth as he selected the correct floor this time.

“in my defence, i was preoccupied.”

a/n: hello pals

i realise only now how similar this is to overdrive but,,, forgive me i wrote it in a meeting

me vs characters meeting lando on a night out and being obsessed immediately >>>

i also: heavily dislike this it just felt rushed so any comments appreciated as author is suffering. battling with my dyslexia every two seconds writing this

- gigi xx

taglist (found here): @idkiwantchocolatee @vellicora @alessioayla @bborra @crimeshowjunkie @paolexsstuff @champagnelovers101 @loxbbg @hobiismyhopeu @moonypixel @celestialpato @champagneproblems17 @ironmaiden1313

[ma1dita]

✩°｡⋆mischiefmoons' 1k celebration⋆｡°✩

i just hit 1.5k but let’s not talk about how overdue this list is lmfao—just wanted to say an absolute thank you from the bottom of my heart to this online community of friends that i’ve found in the past 6 months. you guys make me brave to post my deepest thoughts and craziest creations and the little corner i take up is overfilling with love for all the unhinged comments and chats that genuinely have made my life better during this little postgrad gap year. to many more!

i wanted to gather a list of creations by some of the most talented people i share this lovely space with, some friends, others people i idolize—please support them as well and show them the love you all have shown me!

luke castellan

poisoned mercury (series)- @wlntrsldler (camprock!au luke castellan x fem!reader)

three weeks - @too-deviant (luke castellan x apollo!reader)

spill ur guts / we’ll write sins not tragedies (series) - @kamaluhkhan (luke castellan x nemesis!reader, some mdni)

the jubilee recollection (series) - @klineinie (luke castellan x aristaeus!reader)

you don’t know me - @kestisvrse (spidey!luke castellan x reader)

freaky friday - @too-deviant (luke castellan x reader)

sleepy girl - @sovksluv (luke castellan x hypnos!reader)

rotten to the touch (series) - @supercutszns (luke castellan x reader, suggestive)

the search for glory - @sunsburns (luke castellan x ares!reader, suggestive)

other men seared into my brain

jupiter was supposed to be a star, but failed - @delicrieux (regulus black x reader)

hunger -  @perlelune (coriolanus snow x reader, mdni)

truculent (series) - @theoldsports (coriolanus snow x reader, mdni)

second son (series) - @cherryslyce (regulus black x reader)

i know it when i see it (series) - @bageldaddy (pornstar!joel miller x reader, mdni)

ever since new york (series)- @eideticmemory (college!mgg x reader, mdni)

rocks at your window (series)- @fbfh (ricky bowen x reader, some mdni)

adhd chronicles (series)- @hotchfiles (aaron hotchner x reader)

statuesque lovers - @e1dritchjackal0pe (farleigh start x reader, mdni)

american teenager (series) - @lanascinnamongirls (spencer reid x bau!reader) 

we could be love (series) - @hotchfiles (aaron hotchner x rossi!reader)

treacherous (series)  - @moonlightspencie (remus lupin x reader)

labeled these to the best of my ability and my goldfish brain of a memory but remember, you are responsible for your own consumption

[russellsppttemplates]

What if you and the kids gang up on me? (Pierre Gasly)

Pierre is doing what he can to makes sure his children are raised knowing their roots

Note: english is not my first language. As you maybe know by now, talking about these subjects is a big responsibility for me, but I always hope that I have treated them properly. Also, these are some traditions that I remembered and that I know about!

Thank you so much to everyone who likes and reblogs, your feedback is appreciated 🤍 and I'm taking requests so if you have any ideas or concepts you want to share, feel free to do so as I'll try to get to them the best I can!

my masterlist

Tw: pregnancy

Tag list: @myloverjk-blog

"Did you find what you were looking for?", you asked your husband when he found you in the living room. Because Alexandre had been a little bit fussy the night before and you still had some things to prepare and sort out for the big night tomorrow, you ended up staying with your little boy at home while Pierre went out to get something he needed.

"Yes, they fit well, too. I just put them in the washing machine. And how's this little guy, hm? Is he feeling better?", he pointed to your son. He had been attached to you the whole day, so he had ended up falling asleep on top of you, "he's feeling a bit sorry for himself still, but he's sleeping now, so I guess that's a good thing", you chuckled, remembering the past night where you and Pierre almost slept in shifts since your little boy kept needing your full attention.

The next day, Pierre's parents arrived after lunch, making it the perfect timing to get the kitchen and the dining room ready for the New Year's Eve celebration. Because of how young your son was, you opted to stay inside and have dinner with your in-laws, making the situation a lot more flexible.

"Are you not going to put on the dress you bought?", Pierre asked, taking Alexandre from your arms, "I don't know if it fits me all that well", you admitted, "I'm sure it will, amour, you look gorgeous in everything", he ushered you up the stairs.

While you got ready, Pierre softly knocked on the door of the guest room his parents were staying in, "are you guys ready?", he asked, seeing his parents dressed according to the request he made. Moving to the nursery, he laid his son on the changing mat, grabbing the white shirt and soft pants from the wardrobe before pulling his own trousers he had hid in the room, "let's surprise mama, yes? I bet she'll be so happy to see you. You look like the most handsome boy ever", he kissed his cheek, changing himself as well and walking back to your bedroom to surprise you.

"Me and Alexandre need you to close your eyes", Pierre said after he knocked, "my eyes are closer then", you said, hearing footsteps approach you when you heard your husband's command, "you can open them now".

Opening your eyes, you saw both of your boyd in all white outfits, matching your own, "I know you always wear white because of the traditions you have, so I thought it would be a good one to start now that we have this little one", he smiled, handing Alexandre back to you when you opened and closed your hands and encouraged him to do so.

"This is amazing, amour", you thanked, kissing his lips before taking a good look at both of them, "look at you, meu amor", you kissed your son's cheeks, earning a little giggle from him, "you look so handsome, although I think your outfit won't be this clean for much longer", you tapped his nose.

"Knowing you, yours won't either", your husband teased you, "you look amazing, mon ange", he kissed your forehead, "breathtaking as usual", he smiled, "C'mon, my mother also needed help with her dress and my father was having some trouble with the zipper, and you might be the only one to be able to fiddle with it".

.

"Papa, I want something sweet to eat", Alexandre said, looking for a snack in the cupboard, "do you know how to make those chocolaty balls mama makes? The brigadeiros", the boy struggled with the last words, the letter R still a challenge for him to bend, "Oh, those are so good, papa, please make them!", Louis said.

Pierre had seen you make them what felt like a thousand times before, but now he was doubting himself, "How about we do them together?", he suggested, thinking that if the recipe tasted different, he could also blame it on the fact his children helped him do it and that's why it tasted off and not because of his baking skills.

"First, ingredients!", Pierre announced, moving to the cupboard where you kept the sweet ingredients, "we need this can here, which is called leite condensado, and some cocoa powder", he helped them reach the shelves and grab what they needed, "we also need margarina", he showed them the block of margarine he got from the fridge, "Oh, the word is very similar to the French one", the oldest boy said, "that's right, a lot of the words are similar", he smiled, grabbing the measuring spoons and the pot they needed.

"It makes it easier to learn, even if I'm not that good at it", Alexandre admitted, pouting slightly, "the other day I asked mama to speak to me in Portuguese and I got her request messed up, she wanted her hairbrush and I got her a hair tie", he confessed.

Helping Louis up on the wooden tower so he could be at the level of the counter, Pierre spoke to Alexandre, "you know learning a new language is hard, you're still getting used to it, right? And you're doing a good job, buddy! The first time mama asked me for something in Portuguese, she said it was in the bathroom and I went to the kitchen", he nudged him, seeing his smile creep up.

"So, we have to heat this up, and we have to be careful because we can't have bubbles, alright boys?", Pierre pointed the spoon, "so we just keep stirring the chocolate in now?", Louis wondered, "yes, carefully for a good while".

Despite their usual excitement and rush because they were just kids, the boys actually held up to the request and waited patiently until the bowl had cooled down from the fridge enough so they could roll up the balls, "mama usually makes different toppings, like coconut, and cocoa powder too", Pierre added, "so it's really up to you what you do with yours".

"Can we leave these ones for mama?", Alexandre asked, setting a small tupperware box on the side with some of his and his brother's creations, "yes, I'll put them in the fridge for when she gets back from work, I bet she'll love them".

.

"Come here", your husband whispered, seeing you finish rubbing the cream on your arms, "I want to talk to my little girl", he urged you, helping you sit on the bed so he could scoot down and face your bump. Because this was your third pregnancy, your bump was growing at a much faster pace, making it more prominent and, therefore, a place where you would usually find Pierre's hand whenever he was near you, and tonight was no different.

"Olá, meu amor", he began, "hoje deste um dia complicado à mãe, hm? Mas é um bom sinal, porque significa que estás a crescer e que estamos cada vez mais perto de te conhecer e de te ter nos nossos braços", he smiled, kissing your soft skin. Hello, my love (...) today you gave mama a hard day, hm? Bur that's a good sign, it means you're growing and that we are closer to meeting you and to have you in our arms

"I'll never get over you speaking my mother tongue", you brushed your husband's hair by running your fingers through, "you speak mine, and I have to know, too. I mean, what if one day you and the kids gang up on me?".

[m00nsbaby]

Jealous of your celebrity crush.

Moon system x reader. - Headcanons.

Steven.

It was an amazing date.

You couldn't remember when was the last time you went to the theater, and even though Steven and you had never had money problems, you still saw buying tickets for the front row as a luxury.

That night, you laughed, cried, and even hummed softly to each other. After all, it was your favorite musical.

Oh, and Steven's hand never let go of yours.

"Shall we go to the back?" "Here? Love, we can't…" "Steven!" You blushed, giving his shoulder a light tap. "Not for that, to get an autograph."

Steven was well aware that you both chose that particular show mainly because your favorite Broadway actor was in the cast.

"Run, or we won't catch him."

Your boyfriend truly was your best accomplice in everything. You couldn't think of a time he had said no to your whims, and he was the one who stood up to lead you out of the venue.

As you got closer, he felt something odd in his stomach.

A different sensation.

You felt his hand tighten around yours, and you could only assume he was making sure not to lose you in the crowd that was starting to exit as well.

"I'm nervous," you whispered. "Me too." And you didn't question how odd his response was.

There was a small group of people at the back of the theater, all with the same intention as you – to get an autograph and a photo with the stars of the show. A metal barrier separated them from the actors.

You took a spot toward the back, holding onto the barrier, and Steven positioned himself behind you.

"Should I take the photo, love?" That strange feeling invaded him again when you declined.

And again when a round of gentle applause and cheers echoed through the air. It all felt quite intimate in a way, and that didn't sit well with him.

You gasped loudly when you saw him coming out. That was another point on the list of things Steven wasn't enjoying about this situation.

It didn't seem strange to you when he draped his arm around your shoulders, pulling you closer to him.

"What should I say to him?" You asked eagerly as you watched him move through the crowd, talking, signing autographs, and thanking other fans.

Luckily, you had positioned yourselves towards the end, which gave you time to think about what to say.

"That he did a great job?" Steven pressed his lips together at his own words. It was as if he was suddenly regretting this whole idea, no matter how hard he tried to find his usual kind words, nothing came out.

Finally, it was your turn.

"Did you enjoy the show, guys?" He was so dreamy. A sigh escaped you at how kind he remained, even though he must have been tired. He took his time with each person, getting to know them and chatting.

Steven wasn't impressed by him at all.

In fact, thinking about it, neither his performance nor his singing were as good as he had initially thought.

Rather mediocre, actually.

"Your work is… incredible, really." Your eyes shone as you watched him sign your program.

Your dramatic boyfriend could only think that was the way you looked at him. And that you should only look at him that way.

Only at him.

Steven dissociated from much of your conversation, especially the part where you handed your phone to the other guy for a selfie with you. He snapped back to reality when he asked about Steven.

"He's my boyfriend; I forced him to come." You joked. Why did you two suddenly seemed like lifelong friends?

Besides, it was a lie; he was the one who had initiated the idea.

"I-I wasn't forced at all; I love being involved." He replied honestly. It churned his stomach that the other guy looked at him with admiration. Why did he have to be such a good person?

You said your goodbyes with a hug that left a slight scent of his cologne on you. If it was possible, it made Steven even more nauseous.

"Isn't he charming?" "Sure."

You pursed your lips at Steven's sudden coldness as he walked beside you in the well-lit city, not letting go of your hand.

"Didn't you like him?" "Of course, I liked him, love. Why wouldn't I?"

His rapid speech gave him away, and you remained silent as you tried to figure out what had upset him.

Oh.

Oh.

You decided to test your theory.

"Don't you think his eyes were beautiful?" Another squeeze of your hand, and you had to bite your lip to keep from laughing. "They were just regular eyes."

Bingo. Steven was jealous.

At the entrance to your house, you turned on your heels, taking advantage of the stairs to give you a few extra inches in height so you could look him in the face.

"You know you don't have to be jealous of anyone, right?" His cheeks turned red as you placed your hands on them, giving them a gentle squeeze.

Steven, obediently, held onto your waist.

"You're the love of my life, Steven Grant." Your words were the culmination of a wonderful date, of the happiness he brought you every day.

And yes, a jealous Steven was amusing, but it broke your heart to think that insecurity might be getting the best of him.

His eyes sparkled like the stars.

"You are mine, right, love?" He sounded like a little kid begging for confirmation.

He knew exactly how to play his cards, what puppy-dog face to make based on the situation, and the tone of voice that made butterflies flutter in your stomach.

And a special warmth in your body.

You played along.

"Only yours, sweetheart." You whispered before kissing his lips.

Steven was content with how his little jealousy issue had been resolved, but he was sure of one thing after this.

You wouldn't be watching anything starring that idiot again.

Marc.

Marc was proud of his accomplishment.

Fighting for tickets on a website was more challenging than you could have ever imagined, not to mention the secret maneuvering behind your back. It had probably been his most difficult mission, surpassing all the tasks Khonshu could assign him.

But he would be the first to say it had been worth it. Even more so after having the opportunity to see you cry tears of happiness in his arms on your birthday.

"Will you come with me?" "Of course, dear." That was the biggest surprise, actually. Marc despised crowded places with all his heart, but he was excited to accompany you on such an important moment for you.

When the day of the concert arrived, Marc almost fainted.

He was left speechless by your style, a bit more… dark? You had definitely gotten into character for the concert, and that only encouraged him further.

For a short time.

He regretted it as soon as he saw the line to enter, but that was another matter.

You arrived at the venue early, mentally prepared to stand and wait for a good couple of hours.

And you had to say that after that experience, you were truly ready to marry Marc because you had an amazing time in your little corner between the metal fences. You talked about everything, because despite spending as much time together as possible, once you started talking, no one could silence you.

It was worth it; you almost fainted when you entered and realized you had reached the front row.

Marc, on the other hand, was starting to feel nervous due to the number of people arriving, but he immediately went into his boyfriend role. He let you hold onto the metal railing, and he positioned himself behind you, enclosing you between the fence and his body.

He would rather die than let you get crushed.

When the concert started, Marc was already feeling overstimulated, but he was willing to let you enjoy this. After all, according to the band's official page, it would only be about an hour after the opening acts.

He was satisfied to hear you scream, jump, sing, and smile like he had never seen you do before.

The problem began around 15 minutes into the concert when the lead vocalist fixed his attention on you.

Like clockwork, Marc remembered all those times you had talked about your teenage crush.

A burning sensation rose to his throat, and he furrowed his brow when he saw the singer wink at you while singing.

"Marc! Marc! Marc!" Your shouts pulled him from his thoughts, and you looked at him over your shoulder. "It's my song!" You had been saying that for the last 10 minutes, but it made him laugh. He kissed your lips, and you returned it briefly.

Marc mentally prayed that the idiot had seen that. Who, by the way, seemed unable to take his eyes off you.

The noise was enough to cover the groan that escaped your throat when Marc's hands tightened on your hips, pressing you closer to his body if that was even possible.

You blushed, though it was impossible to tell whether it was that or just the heat from jumping around for so long.

The straw that broke the camel's back was when the other guy leaned over the edge of the stage to your level and grabbed your phone from your hands.

You were going crazy. Screaming, with tears of sheer excitement in your eyes.

Marc rolled his eyes. Cheap tricks, he thought.

His only consolation was knowing he had made you scream louder before.

The phone returned to your hands after the guy recorded himself singing a few lines and interacting with the crowd.

This was definitely the best day of your life, or you were dreaming.

When the last song came on, his instinct was stronger than him. He ended up turning you around, and you didn't complain.

This was his special moment.

You could swear he kissed you the entire time the song played, until you relaxed in his arms, and the music seemed like a background melody accompanying you.

You would have never imagined that Marc was marking his territory.

He showered you with kisses until the lights came on, making you aware that you were still in public. You separated almost instantly, your cheeks red.

"Marc! You made me miss the last song!" You didn't seem upset as he leaned his forehead against yours.

You had enough time for yourselves while people began to leave.

"You don't seem too upset." Your hips hurt from the way he had been holding you for the past several minutes.

"Thank you," you whispered before kissing him one last time. "It's the best gift I've ever received."

Marc didn't have time to tell you how much he loved you; his gaze focused on the two large guys wearing backstage passes on their chests that were scanning the crowd.

You never knew why Marc pulled you out of there in a hurry, but you had no more doubts or questions when he distracted you with bribes, he bought you the T-shirt you liked the most, and a poster at which he would later throw darts.

Straight at the lead singer's face.

Jake.

At this precise point in his life, Jake considered himself probably the most unfortunate man who had ever existed.

Because, of course, the first time he ignored his desires to throw the guy into the nearest sewer and let him be forgotten over time.

Even more when he complimented your nails.

"Of course, they're nice," he thought to himself. "Even more so when they're wrapped around my…"

He couldn't continue mentally killing him; he had to smile and say "I'm the boyfriend" when you two bumped into your favorite actor on the streets of New York.

It made his stomach turn to notice how you fidgeted with your hands, trying to appear calm.

In fact, he couldn't decide whether he liked that more than if you had just voiced your desire to scream.

Both options made him want to put on Khonshu's suit.

The upside was that, for security reasons, you couldn't take a photo with him, so he could live without having to see you smile even more next to him forever.

Without being dramatic, he would erase his memory if he could just to forget that all this happened.

But you could say it was a fairly harmless encounter as far as possible. Well, for Jake, who never expressed how this was eating him up inside. You, on the other hand, had to wake up the next day with marks on your body caused by him.

His hands on your neck and waist, bites on your shoulders.

Although, you weren't complaining. It was a nice reminder that even though there were many attractive men out there (with acting skills like gods), none of them would ever drive you as crazy as Jake Lockley.

The problem came when you ran into him for the second time.

Jake didn't consider himself particularly insecure.

You yourself had to deal with a thousand girls who thought he was flirting with them because of that permanent smile on his face.

Or that habit you hated so much of winking at them to get a free dessert or to get you two seated faster at the restaurant.

But sometimes, Jake's ego wavered.

That small part of him that still felt like a tool for Marc and Steven, forgetting that he was a person in his own right.

You kept him aware of his independence, and when he doubted that… everything was a disaster for him.

So, you can imagine how he crumbled when the other guy recognized you.

"Of course, I remember you!" He was so loud that Jake swore he had a headache just from listening to him talk.

You almost fainted right there.

He grabbed your hands again to see your nails, excited about the new design, while Jake was thinking about how easy it would be to cut off his hands in that position.

You didn't need to say anything for him to understand your protest; both of you looked at each other in reproach.

"It's the same perfume, right?" The aforementioned guy took you out of the momentary staring contest with Jake, whom you could feel breathing down your neck despite being about two steps away from you.

You nodded silently.

"I knew it. I can still smell you on me."

After that, Jake swore he was seeing everything in shades of red, and a shiver ran down your spine because you could feel his gaze fixed on you.

"Well, we're already running late." Jake's accent interrupted your conversation, and his hand settled on the small of your back. You bit your lower lip because at this point, you didn't know if he was scaring you or if you wanted to push this limit further.

"Oh, but this time we can take the picture that you wanted so much…" "Really late." Jake interrupted him immediately, that smile that made you tremble from head to toe. In fact, he didn't even let him respond, or finish that sentence in which he seemed about to tell you he was glad to see you.

"Come on, mi vida." A bad omen.

His hand slid slowly down your back until it reached your hand, gripping your wrist with his usual firmness, but you noticed an extra touch of strength.

It's needless to emphasize how he devoured your mouth as soon as you entered the building.

It was going to be a long night.

And mentally, you thanked the city's cold weather; you could wear scarves without anyone wondering what your possessive boyfriend had done to you the previous night.

You would consider making him jealous more often.

yeah, i wasn't really a fan of this lol, anyways, here's a little extra of which guys i thought about while writing this in order of appearance!!

[cindylcuwho]

¡ purely nonsense , prologue ♥︎ !

“ ⭒.‧ i don’t even know , im talking nonsense ‧. ⭒ “

01 — 02 — more to come 🥥

* ⋆ . · ⋆ y/n laid on her stomach, her left thumb mindlessly scrolled through tiktoks, occasionally doubling tapping to heart entertaining videos.

after seeing the fifth edit of herself, which used similar clips to the ones before, she closed tiktok and opened twitter in hopes of better entertainment.

always wanting to be in touch with her fans, she regularly viewed her mentions and right now was no different. many fans were tagging her in late album reviews, random photos and mindless tweets, the occasional hate tag, and some begging for a collab with varies of different artists.

one mentions caught her eye. well, multiple, actually. the first three began the in similar ways, “ @ y/nsmusical omg ?!! “ . she refreshed the page, thinking that twitter was just glitching and showing the same tweet over and over. though the mention didn’t go away, in fact more popped up.

she clicked on the top one and it led her to a 45 second clip of three random strangers that shared the same face.

. ⭒ ☆ ━ ☆ ⭒ .

“growing up, i had the fattest crush on marge from the simpsons” the guy wearing a sky blue hoodie with ‘fresh love’ printed on the front joked.

the camera switched, showing off the blonde version of the guy before, except he was wearing a plain white shirt. “can we be honest? homer would be a huge sma—“

the other two began bursting out laughing, not letting him finish the sentence. the blonde giggled along with them, “what, i thought dad bods were in right now?”

“nick, no!” one of them cried out, still laughing. “as if any of your celebrity crushes are any better?!” ‘nick’ defended.

the one wearing a backwards pink trucker hat moved his mic closer, staring nick dead in the eyes. “are you calling mine –who is a grammy nominee and an it girl since childhood– as bad as a yellow cartoon?!“

“yours hasn’t changed since you were eleven, chris! its time to move on, buddy!” blue hoodie guy snorted out. he looked at the camera with a shrug, “he’s been obsessed with y/n carpenter since.. i wanna say a little before girl meets world and that ended, what? 2017?”

chris jumped up and down his seat, “why’re we name dropping?? matt, stopp!” he exclaimed. “damn, not even gonna deny the allegations, christopher?”

chris looked down at the table, a rosy blush creeped on his cheeks as he thought of the words.

“there’s nothing to deny.. y/ns influence is probably the reason i’m the man that i am, and you know what? she’s still doing great things and thriving.”

nick gasped, “oh!,” he tapped on the table, reminded of something, “she’s supposed to be releasing an album hella soon– are you gonna be streaming?”

chris smirked, “of course, anything to support my girl.” nick and matt let out an ‘ooo’ at their younger brothers sudden boldness.

“your girl?” matt scoffed, challenging his brothers attitude. chris nodded, arms crossed. “y/n doesn’t know you exist, kid.” he reminded.

“she will, and then we’ll get married and i’ll star in the reboot season of girl meets world. that’s been the dream.” chris listed off his plans. “marriage before the first date is crazy,” nick stated.

the three began changing the subject, which was when the clip ended.

. ⭒ ☆ ━ ☆ ⭒ .

y/n exited the video tab, a small smile rested on her face. she knew there was definitely fans that stuck around from her younger acting years, fans that were other influencers, and definitely fans that believed they could steal her heart, but the cockiness from this ‘chris’ guy was undeniably kind of attractive.

‘who is he?’ she wondered. though intrigued, y/n was too lazy to go on another deep google search about someone so she stuck to what would have the best and quickest response.

tweeting out to her fans.

her thumbs tapped for a minute, before hitting ‘tweet’, knowing there was no turning back.

. ⭒ ☆ ━ ☆ ⭒ .

within seconds people were already responding with numerous answers.

↳ @ y/nsemails : OH MY GOD WHAT

↳ @ nessabarrett : your future husband apparently ⁉️ ↻ @ynsmusical : damnit thought i had a chance to relate to ylm

↳ @ sturnstar : which one of yall snitched 😭

↳ @ beybayboo : search sturniolo triplets on youtube !! ↻ @ynsmusical : finally a real answer 😻😻

↳ randomuzer : oooo chris is in trouble 😮‍💨

↳ user123 : pls don’t lower your standards to some youtuber 🤢🤢 ↻ @ chrissbaby : calm down she was just asking who he was ..

↳ @ lilnasx : industry baby reference 😌 ↻ @ y/nsmusical : ofccc ur always on repeat ❣️

↳ @ grlm33tswrld : WAIT OMG WE NEED A SHIP NAME ↻ @ lo0kingaty/n : no we do not !!

↳ @ billieeilish : did we just find whose house your sock is at ?? ↻ @ y/nmusical : shh you’re leaking my music thats illegal 😞😞

. ⭒ ☆ ━ ☆ ⭒ .

sturniolo triplets. well yeah it made sense they were, they had the same face how did that not click?

youtube was immediately opened, the display showing off their channel that already had a pretty decent amount of subscribers.

somehow, innocently wanting to know who this random guy is turned into binge watching his and his triplet brothers youtube videos.

y/n wouldn’t deny, they were definitely funny– and quite loud. chris’s energy in the 20 minute long videos matched hers, partially confirming that her influence truly did influence the man he is today.

she was laughing at whatever nonsense chris was saying, nick and matt obviously did not care with the expressions on their face. the moment got cut short when her phone began to ring, her good friend billie calling.

“hey!” she spoke. “hey, would you mind coming to the studio real quick? it’s for the album.”

y/n sat up on the edge of her bed, praying nothing was wrong with it. it was supposed to come out within the following month. what if all the files were deleted? or even worse, what if songs were leaked.

“i thought today was my day off?” she rested her phone on her white nightstand, putting it speaker on so she can slip on a random pair of socks.

“it is- but don’t worry, we just need to record some extra vocals, nothing too big and we’ll be out of there within 20.” billie reassured.

she nodded, already walking out to her car. billie had already hung up, letting y/n hook the bluetooth from her phone up to her car to play music.

her right hand rested on the stick shift, her left currently swiping through apps. she was about to swipe up on instagram, but something told her not to.

she had to be in the studio within ten minutes, this would only take a couple of seconds, right? typing in the search bar, his account was the first to pop up.

y/n debated with herself in her head. there’s no real point in doing this, this puts him in a 50/50 spotlight and could cause rumors on top of rumors.

rolling her eyes and ignoring the doubtful thoughts, she pressed the button and exited the app, going back to spotify to play her favorite playlist as she drove.

‘ y/nsmusical began following christophersturniolo ‘

— ꒰ 🍒 ꒱ dedicated to , and idea created by @freshloveee :)

— ꒰ 💭 ꒱ was so excited to write this- sorry that the ending kind of drags on, i didn’t know how to end it lmaoo! how we feelin’ though ? (comment if you wanna be added to a taglist- i might do one for this)

[star-anise]

So I've been watching this series of videos where a research-focused psychologist goes through Jordan Peterson's work to see which of his ideas and arguments are based on solid empirical evidence. I love it, even though she does mistakenly say his background is in counselling psychology (my field) when he's actually a clinical psychologist.

Anyway, that's got me thinking about Jordan Peterson, and how his response to criticism is, "People have been after me for a long time because I’ve been speaking to disaffected young men — what a terrible thing to do, that is. [...] I thought the marginalized were supposed to have a voice.”

So, here's my theory: Young men of the 21st century have grown up in a culture that is specifically hostile and punitive towards them. However, I think that while girls and women can participate in this culture, it is as much or more the work of boys and men. And I think that the problem with Peterson is that he's not particularly good at helping his audience escape the maze they are trapped in--and he's absolutely opposed to any attempt to dismantle a maze that is actually of fairly recent manufacture.

Case in point: The metrosexual.

The word "metrosexual" was coined in 1994 by Mark Simpson, a gay writer whose settings seem to be perpetually fixed at "critique the shit out of it".

"Metrosexual" describes heterosexual men who might be mistaken as gay, because they are interested in things very common among gay men, including: Caring about whether they're attractive; caring about how their hair is cut and what products they use in it; caring about what clothes they wear; working out to make their bodies look better; frequenting nightclubs. To be "metrosexual" was, in some people's opinions, to be a "man-boy" searching for his "inner girl".

To be metrosexual was, in some ways, to be called someone who looked gay.

The term didn't really catch on until the early 2000s, when media became briefly obsessed with talking about which celebrities were "metrosexual" or not. In that era of hotly divided opinions over the acceptability of homosexuality and queerness, it was implicitly asking, "Who looks gay? Is he gay? Tell me, fellow broadcaster: How gay does this guy look to you?"

(They got to have their cake and eat it too. A liberal audience, desperate to gather as many LGBTQ+ people and allies as possible in their race for 50% acceptance of gay marriage, cherished any signs that people with social clout might be on their side. And a conservative one, watching the same discussion, would heartily enjoy seeing a rogues' gallery of degenerate Hollywood types paraded before them, their every effeminacy pointed out in loving detail.)

Which of course got us: The Retrosexual!

When everybody's helpfully compiling lists of all the things a man can do that look gay or unmanly, dudes who don't want to get the shit kicked out of them by homophobes know all the things not to do!

Therefore, being "manly" became strictly defined by what was off-limits. To be a Real Man meant you shouldn't care about whether you're attractive, or what soap you use, or how your hair is styled. You shouldn't enjoy dancing or get too enthusiastic about music. A Real Man cares about sports and beer and being on top! Dominant!! A WINNER!!!

And, so like, here's a secret: In Anglophone culture, we are very affected by the Puritan legacy that says pleasure is inherently sinful. Vanity and pride--caring about how you look and whether you're attractive--are literal gateways to the Devil. Gluttony, and therefore seeking pleasure at all, is another such. And in Puritan religious theology, women are inherently more sinful. Yes, it goes back to Adam and Eve, and how Eve was tempted into sin first. Long story short, things associated with women became associated with sinfulness, and sinfulness became associated with effeminacy. And for centuries, you haven't even needed to be religious to drink these attitudes from the groundwater.

Okay, that's not the secret, this is the secret: Pleasure is not inherently sinful.

And liking how you look and feeling attractive and paying attention to your sensuality and your emotional life and connecting with art in a real and vulnerable way can feel really good, if you're able to handle it well.

Being raised to be a Real Man in a world where masculinity is perceived to be actively under threat is so uniquely painful, I believe, because every attempt to define yourself as "not gay" means denying yourself one of life's pleasures, and telling yourself you never even wanted it in the first place.

And then those desperate to be Real Men found a way to take some of those things back in what is surely the most painful context possible: They are allowed strictly as tools of your heterosexuality and masculine need for dominance. You are allowed to care about grooming and dancing, etc, purely as a strategy in playing a game called "Getting Girls", where you either score or you don't, where not scoring means you're worthless and unlovable, and scoring is often... strangely unfulfilling and certainly not enough to fill the aching void inside of you.

The mistake both Peterson and his fanbase make is that they get to this point, and then think: The reason I feel so empty inside is... I just haven't gotten enough girls!

Maybe some guys get out of the maze by finding a woman who is allowed to care about things like affection and love and dancing and looking nice, and their connection with her lets them express all the other parts of their souls that didn't fit in the Real Man box, but can come out in roles like Boyfriend or Father.

But humans aren't telepathic, so relationships can only "fix" you so much as you're willing to do the work of nurturing your own soul in a safe environment, so for a lot of men the maze never ends, and sometimes they don't even get the fleeting joys of relationships or sex, since they're so fucked up about them!

At this point, I as a queer woman am like, "Solution's obvious! Dismantle the maze."

And Peterson, who has worked his whole life to achieve the status of Best Maze-Runner in All of Christendom, is clinging to it like, "NO! DOWN, YOU DARK CHAOTIC MOTHER! THIS MAZE GIVES MY LIFE MEANING! THIS MAZE CONNECTS ME TO MY FOREFATHERS! I CANNOT LIVE WITHOUT THIS MAZE!"

At which point, like... what can you do but just leave him there?

At least he's not in my area of specialization. The world would be too unkind if I had to deal with him in any professional capacity. I wish Clinical Psychology all their continued joy of him.

[pahtoosh]

apologies and kisses

[image ID: pictures on a light purple background. there are five different baby blankets, a few different bottles of laundry detergent, and an image of chris evans as steve rogers looking smug and another of sebastian stan looking comedically distraught/.end ID]

masterlist

summer celebration masterlist

18+

wc: ~2200 words

warnings: having to do chores. baby is kind of dramatic in this(but justified!)

a/n: the movies moodboards are back. this is the first post of my summer celebration!!! also my first "and kisses" piece!!! "and kisses" just means there are lots of kisses and this is important because i love kisses :)

pairing: stucky x gn!little!reader (Dada = Steve, Baba = Bucky, Daddies = both Steve and Bucky)

summary: Steve leaves you and Bucky alone for a day and your Baba manages to make a mistake worthy of an apology and lots of kisses

⋆｡ﾟ☁︎｡⋆｡ ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡⋆ ⋆｡ﾟ☁︎｡⋆｡ ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡⋆ ⋆｡ﾟ☁︎｡⋆｡ ﾟ

“Okay, I’m leaving for my meeting now!” Steve called out. “Just making this announcement in case one of my loves wants to show me some love before I go!” 

Your dada would never leave without a proper goodbye unless it was an emergency, but he likes teasing you. You took the bait every time. 

“Dada! Dada wait!” You rushed to the door and “caught” Steve just as he was about to open the door. 

“Oh goodness! You just barely made it, pumpkin. I was practically out the door!” He set down his briefcase and gave you a hug and kiss. He looked over your shoulder for any sign of Bucky. “Hm. Only one of my loves came to say goodbye. I guess that’s it then. Bye sweetheart, I’ll see you later tonight.”

“No! No! Baba! Baba, come say bye bye to Dada, you have to!”

Bucky shook his head at your and Steve’s antics. He walked leisurely down the hallway before kissing Steve goodbye. 

“You sure took your time,” Dada teased. 

“I can’t be spoiling you now. Sometimes ya gotta play a lil’ hard to get.” Bucky winked. 

Steve laughed and muttered idiot before returning the kiss. “You two gonna be okay without me?”

“Yes, Steve. I’ve got the schedule and the chore chart and the MyPlate chart that you printed out for me. Twice. Relax, I’ve got this. They’re my baby too, you know.”

Your dada sighed. “I know, and I trust you but it’s been a while since we’ve been separated.”

Bucky rubbed his shoulders. “We’re gonna be fine, it’s only for a few hours-”

“Six hours.”

“And those six hours will be fun and productive thanks to the schedule you lovingly created for us. We’ll be okay, you can just focus on your meeting. Unless that’s why you’re acting like a mother hen right now.” Bucky raised an eyebrow. “Are you worrying about us so you don’t have to think about your meeting?”

Steve stood a little straighter and fixed his tie. “Steve Rogers doesn’t run away from his problems. But if he did, that’d be a pretty darn good reason.”

Bucky laughed. “Okay, Captain. Whatever you say, now go kick some ass.”

“Language.” He kissed you one more time. “Bye, sweetheart.” He kissed Bucky. “Be good.”

“Why am I being told to ‘be good’?”

“Because our sweet little angel is always good. You’re the trouble around here.” Steve smiled at you and walked out the door, closing it behind him before your baba could respond. 

“Unbelievable. Did you hear that, lovie? Dada’s talking as if he wasn’t the biggest troublemaker his whole life.” He stopped looking at the door to face you. “How ‘bout those chores? Should we get started on them?”

“Don’t wannaaaa,” you whined. 

“I know, me neither but we gotta show Dada how responsible I can be. Will you help me with that, baby?”

“Mmm. Okay. But then I don’t have to eat Dada’s veggie sprouts for dinner.”

Your baba threw his head back in laughter. “Trust me, angel. Baba wouldn’t make you eat that mess even if you were the naughtiest baby in the world.”

𓏲 ࣪₊♡

Two hours later, you and Bucky had finished watering the plants, cleaning your playroom, and doing the dishes. The only two chores left on Steve’s list were to dust all the shelves and lamps in the house and do the laundry. Bucky hated dusting, so he was saving that task for last. 

He stood a little straighter and used his sergeant voice to grab your attention. “Agent baby, I have a very important task for you.”

You copied his posture. “I’m listenin’, sargan’ baba!”

“I need you to round up all the blankies in the playroom and living room and escort them to the laundry room. And bring any loose socks you see on your way. Those tricky little guys have escaped us for the last time.”

“Yes, sargan’ baba!” You did as he said, gathering the lightweight blankets that collected on the back of the couch and in one of your playroom’s baskets. You carefully walked to the laundry room with your huge pile of blankets nearly blocking your whole face. 

“I gots dem, Baba!”

“That’s very impressive, baby! And in record time too,” Bucky praised. He took the blankets from your hands and placed them into the machine. “One, two, three, four, five, si- wait, we’re missing one. Where’s your blankie, lovie?”

You looked up innocently. “Bankie’s not dirty.”

“Now I know that’s not true. I can’t remember the last time we washed blankie.”

“But, but what if bankie don’ like the water?” You pouted and formed a crease between your brows. 

“Blankie will be fine, sweetheart. Blankets are meant to be washed! And don’t you want your blankie to be fresh and clean? Think about how you feel after a nice bath. Good, right?”

You looked down and played with the hem of your shirt. “Yah, feels good.”

“Okay, then can you get blankie for me? Or do you want sergeant baba to come with you?”

“No, I do it!” You straightened up and rushed to get your blankie, wanting to show Baba your independence. 

You carefully handed blankie to Bucky. 

“Thank you, doll. Now blankie’s gonna take a little trip with these other blankies and when they’re done they’re gonna be all clean! While I do this can you look for the feather duster in the closet? I’ll be back out in a minute.”

“Okay, Baba!”

Now alone with the washing machine, Bucky turned the knob to the correct settings and reached for the detergent. There were three different bottles on the shelf. Wait, which brand is used for blankets? How much are you supposed to use? And who needs three different kinds of laundry detergent?

Steve had been taking care of the laundry lately in exchange for Bucky cleaning the kitchen. Steve was also more particular about how fabrics felt after washing, explaining the need for different detergents. Bucky decided to put a little bit of each detergent in the machine and hope for the best. He pressed the start button and left to find you and the feather duster. 

𓏲 ࣪₊♡

Not too long later, every bookshelf and lampshade in the house was dust-free, Bucky put the blankets in the dryer, and you both ate lunch. By the time the dishes were cleaned, the dryer played a happy tune signaling that the blankets were dry. 

“Baba! Is blankie time!”

He gasped. “Blankie time? We gotta move fast! Hold on baby, Baba’s gonna get you there!” He lifted you off his lap and carried you to the laundry room, moving up and down while making airplane noises. 

“Wooosh! Wooosh! Wow, baby, look at how fast you’re going!”

You squealed and held onto Bucky’s Henley for dear life. “I’m zoomin! I go so high so fast!”

“Aaaand we’ve made it to blankieland!” He put on a voice and pretended to talk into a radio. “Passengers, we have just landed in blankieland. Please stay still while we take out the blankies and give your Babas a kiss for the ride.”

You giggled and kissed Bucky on the cheek before wiggling out of his arms. “Mwah! Down please!”

He set you down and opened the dryer, putting all the blankets into a clean basket so he could take out the dryer lint while you got your blankie. He closed the door and then turned to you. 

“So, how’s blankie? All clean and fresh?”

“B-Baba?” Your lip was trembling and your eyes were filling up with tears. 

“Oh, baby what’s wrong?” He crouched down to your level.

“My blankie! You ruined blankie!” You dropped blankie and ran to your room crying. 

Confused, Bucky picked up your blanket from the floor and a pant of guilt hit him. Blotches of the fabric were discolored. It made your blanket look like someone spilled Steve’s green juice on it. He inspected the other blankets and for some reason, only yours was affected. 

Baba felt so bad for ruining something that meant so much to you. He wanted to go comfort you, but sometimes you needed time alone after a conflict. 

While giving you some space, Bucky tried to fix his mistake. He thought about all the ways he could get the stains out. He tried a stain-removing pen, but there was no change. He got a small part wet and blotted it with a towel. Again, nothing happened. Surely putting it into the machine again wouldn’t fix things, that's how he got into this mess. And he was hesitant to try vinegar, the idea of your blanket being stained and smelly was too much. With no other solutions left to try, Bucky went to go check on you. 

Luckily, you left your door wide open. You were so distracted that you just ran straight toward crying into your pillow and stuffies. Bucky could hear your cries all around the house. He was concerned about how long you’d been crying for. How much time did he spend in that laundry room?

“Baby? Baby, I’m so sorry. Baba’s so sorry he ruined your blankie.” Bucky carefully sat down on your bed and rubbed your back in a soothing gesture. “I’ll buy you a new blankie, yeah? I’ll buy you as many as you want, as big as you want, as colorful as you want.”

He couldn’t be too sure, but he might’ve heard you sob the word “no” three times. 

“Angel, I’m so sorry. I just wanted you to have a clean blankie. When Dada gets back I’ll have him teach me how to clean blankie the correct way, okay? Maybe he can fix this.” Bucky actually wasn’t sure this was something that could be fixed, but he’d say anything to make you happy. “It was an honest mistake, angel. Can you forgive me?”

“I never forgive you, Baba! Never ever ever ever!” You smashed your face into a pillow and kept sobbing. 

Bucky sighed and held his head in his hands. He was hoping for an ounce of Steve’s patience right now. He thought about taking you over to the tower himself. You could see Steve sooner. Maybe some of the other Avengers would still be there and they could help cheer you up. Or maybe he could bribe you with treats, he did just go grocery shopping yesterday...

Luckily, your Dada was just about to park the car. He opened the door expecting to see either you running up to him or you and Bucky sleeping on the couch, exhausted from all the chores. He was not expecting to hear you crying. Steve quickly took off his shoes and found the two of you. 

“What’s going on?” It was an odd scene, you lying face down in the middle of the bed, sobbing while Bucky was perched on the edge about to pull his hair out. 

You turned over and reached out to Dada, still whimpering. He picked you up and reached for a tissue to clean your face. “What’s got my little sweetheart so worked up, hmm?”

“B-Baba wuined bankie.” You hid your face in Steve’s neck, too tired to do anything else. 

Dada looked over to Bucky with a raised brow. 

“I was doing the laundry and I messed up blankie.”

“Show me.”

Bucky left to get blankie while Steve sat on your bed with you in his lap. “Sweetheart, look at me.”

You whined and nuzzled deeper into Steve’s shoulder. 

He sighed and rubbed your back, beginning to talk anyway. “I know how much blankie means to you, baby. I’m sorry Baba ruined it. Did Baba say sorry to you?”

You sniffled. “Ya.”

“And did you forgive him?”

You didn’t answer. 

“Babyyy,” he said in a warning tone. Steve did not appreciate unanswered questions. 

“No. I say I never forgive him.”

He sucked in a breath. “That’s harsh, now why would you say that?”

“Because blankie!”

“I know, I know. But don’t you think Baba is a little more important than blankie? I bet Baba’s real sorry even without your crying.”

Bucky came into your room with blankie. Steve reached for it and inspected the damage. 

“You poured the detergent straight onto it instead of using the slot, didn’t you?”

“How did you know that?”

Steve grimaced. “I made that mistake too. With my own blanket, thankfully. This kind of fabric just soaks it up. And why are the splotches different colors? Which detergent did you use?”

Bucky scratched the back of his neck. “All of them?” Steve’s eyes widened. “I didn’t use a lot! Just a little of each. Why do we need three different kinds anyway?”

Steve laughed. “It’s okay, Buck. I’ll show you the ropes next time.” He turned to you. “See, baby? It was an accident. Baba was trying so hard to clean blankie that he used three whole different soaps!”

You giggled softly and snuck a peek at your daddies. Steve looked hopeful while Bucky still looked sad and a little embarrassed. You didn’t like seeing Baba so down. You reached out to him. 

He looked surprised. “You want me to hold you?” When you nodded, he reached out to pick you up. He pressed his forehead to yours, closing his eyes. “Again, I’m so sorry baby. Baba didn’t know.”

You held his face with both hands. “Is okay Baba. Sorry for being a meanie.”

He laughed. “You’re no meanie, angel.” He kissed you and then cuddled you, mouthing thank you to Steve over your shoulder. 

The next day, your daddies took you on a trip to buy a new blankie and Steve spent an hour showing Bucky how to do the laundry. He even took notes and laminated them to keep in the laundry room.

[baddestbittyontheblock]

ellie williams fic recs (3/3)

you are responsible for the content you consume‼️

✧*:·˚ hi everyone!! here is a list of all the fics that are my favs with tagged writers/authors ✧*:·˚

✧*:·˚ remember to like and reblog the works you enjoy in order to support each writer!! ✧*:·˚

✧*:·˚ however, make sure you read the information on each story themselves such as triggers & warnings ✧*:·˚

✧*:·˚ also, if you'd like me to remove your fic from this list, message me! ✧*:·˚

°。°。°。°。°。°。°。°。°。°。°。°。°。°。

𖣦 drunk!ellie headcannons by @savannahsdeath drunk!college!ellie williams x reader | slightly suggestive, throwing up, obviously alcohol

-drunk!ellie who can't drink alone or she'd completely pass out.

𖣦 giving loser!ellie head for the first time by @moncherellie ellie williams x gn!reader | cunnilingus (e receiving, r giving), ellie's first time, fingering

-eating loser!ellie out is a religious experience

𖣦 pretty on camera by @evera-era ellie williams x afab!reader | tlou!au, slight coercion, dirty talk, oral e!receiving, fingering, spanking, ellie is kinda rough, sex tape !!

-you hear ellie’s footsteps behind you. she enters the bedroom you’re in, giving a small sigh. the two of you were currently on patrol, scouting a cabin. this route typically didn’t give you any problems; it could be a bit of a drag.

𖣦 teasing ellie over text by @elliesprettygirl ellie williams x reader

𖣦 victory lap by @elliesflower ellie williams x f!reader | rich!ellie, plus-sized female!reader, degradation (kinda), mean!ellie, vouyerism, semi-public masturbation(kinda?), ellie and reader are both perverted ngl

-It was yet another blazing hot day at the country club, the sun’s sweltering rays kissing the backs of your legs as you bent down to retrieve a fallen golf ball from the bright green turf, careful not to bend straight over so that your panties would be on full display for anyone who dared to walk behind you.

𖣦 smut blurb by @elstoy ellie williams x reader | smut

-anyone else ever think about being on ur knees for ellie mid patrol?

𖣦 small hands by @hunnylagoon ellie williams x reader | warning for mentions of postpartum depression

-people say that the magic disappears when you have children, that never applied to you and ellie, you are just as hopelessly in love as the day you were married. you celebrate christmas with your friends and family despite a few bumps in the road.

𖣦 ellie drabble by @dsybouquet ceo!ellie williams x fem!reader

-braindead about ceo! ellie who goes out with her managers for drinks after a day in the office. the first buttons of her white shirt open and the rest of her suit a bit losely, letting go of the work environment to enjoy herself.

𖣦 ellie blurb by @astralnymphh high!ellie williams x fem!reader | mdni!, smut

-bro high!ellie is the typa girl to strap you, lazily.

𖣦 camping by @elliespet modern farm!ellie x gf!reader | smut 18+, cursing

-on your anniversary, ellie sets up a special date. how sweet of her! no way she’ll act like a feral dog out here right.. right?

𖣦 random smut blurb by @scarleart ellie williams x fem!reader | smut

-can we just sit and talk for a moment about how ellie is a fucking feen for creamers????

𖣦 birthday girl by @mxlktxa ellie williams x fem!reader | language, (brief) 18+ content , alcohol use, modern!au, (brief) underage drinking (reader is turning 20, while ellie is 22)

-i placed my keys and bag right at the front door, leaning against the front door to mentally prepare myself for whatever ellie had planned for my birthday today.

𖣦 loser!ellie blurb by @seattlesellie ellie williams x reader

-loser!ellie calling u mommy while u ride her strap

𖣦 college basketball player!ellie drabble by @eroseas ellie williams x fem!reader | exhibitionism, getting caught masturbating (both ellie and reader)

𖣦 dealer!ellie williams by @astroels

-dealer ellie who's actually just a loser lesbian with too much love and money to spend

𖣦 ellie blurb by @lovergirlism ellie williams x reader | no warnings, just silly domestic fluff, ellie’s sexy and you like looking at her, reader is dramatic

-“what’s cookin’, good lookin’?”

𖣦 street racer!ellie headcannons by @phantombriide ellie williams x reader | fluff, smut, and angst if you squint, spin in a circle and really put your mind to it. mentions of joel dying, mentions of squirting, fingering, strap-fucking, nudity, um reader gets off on her gear shift..., reader also gets off to the vibrations of her car

𖣦 "what would you do if i went to touch you now?" by @louswrld11 ellie williams x f!reader | wlw relationship, moderndayau!, whiny ellie (dying), oral, fingering, ellie's a switch?? wow, face sitting (i literally screamed into my pillow), cuddling!!!, ellie begging??omg yes pls, reader being more of a dom, ellie being a bit of a brat. literally just lesbians

-ellie hates it when you're not paying attention to her

𖣦 clingy!ellie headcanons by @dumblilb ellie williams x f!reader | SMUT 18+ MDNI, oral and fingering (r!receiving), masturbation, weed, fluff, loser!ellie

[accio-victuuri]

another interesting angle about wyb’s hat during the GQ event. i looked up both cpf and so/o wardrobe accounts and i didn’t see them identify where the hat came from. everything else tho was chanel, and the suit was dunhill which the brand themselves posted about. we didn’t think too much about it at the time cause we were too busy connecting it to luffy and other things.

now a post from fans & a little bit of detective work tells us where it could possibly come from. a fan posted about a hat store (hat of cain) in raffles hotel where xz stayed and took photos for his ralph’s club event. they look v close to what wyb wore.

if you go back to xzs vlog, there is a cut (p3) where you see downstairs from XZ is. people are saying that it is close to where the shop is. so that was a little clue from them. we have talked about how it appeared out of character for xzs to post a vlog in the midst of all the GQ event noise. they could easily post it the next day or even the weekend so it will go on hot search or better yet, so he won’t be accused of trying to steal the spotlight from other celebrities. no we think we know why. and why he was trying to match ybo’s caption. it’s him ( allegedly ) trying to say that he was responsible for WYB’s fashion accessory of the day. in his own way, showing off the same way that wyb was. 🤍

I’M SORRY XZ & XZS, we didn’t catch up on that hint sooner. We could only do so much investigative work. Lol. We will be better next time 😌😌😌😌

You can visit their IG to compare and see for yourself how similar it is to what WYB wore. I also looked up their website and Raffles Hotel was listed as one of the locations that have their store. You can even see one of their ig posts that talks about their product and a detail inside the hat ( p3 is yibo and p4 is the ig post ) is the same as yibo’s. I’m not an expert so i don’t know if this is a standard when making all hats with the same material but i have to say that the similarity is v interesting.

I mean, what are the chances really???

You have XZ who was recently in Singapore. Very publicly at that and it was not a secret that he stayed at Raffles Hotel. At this time, the theme of GQ MOTY was already set and they have already given the theme of the guest having to walk on land & water and not just your usual red carpet. Maybe XZ picked it cause he knew how much WYB loves hats. It could also be to match what he would be doing for his public event where he is the Guest of Honor.

Then WYB comes in and showed off this hat. We were all thinking it’s One Piece & Luffy coded, which it could be, but we’re now only realizing the deeper meaning. Why he was so attached to it too. YBO released a bts video earlier 12/9 and WYB was joking that he had a hat too like the one rowing, so that means he can also row the boat. Turns out, the style he was wearing is called a boater hat. So it fits. XZ bought it for him as a souvenir that he knew WYB would like, with the thought of the GQ event’s theme.

Maybe XZ wasn’t even implying that WYB wear it that prominently. He just thought of WYB when he saw it and being the person that he is thought that it would be a good accessory for a photoshoot related to WYB’s public event. Maybe he can explore parts of the old town venue and get some shots of him with it. However, much like WYB loves to show off things that XZ gave him, it became his main accessory for the day ( not my words, YBO said that in their caption lol ).

Lastly, I remember one of XZ’s staff was holding a raffles paper bag when they were going home. What’s on it that he had to hold it for safekeeping? If the shop was in the Raffles Boutique, wouldn’t a thing bought from there use the hotel’s paper bag? Wouldn’t you want to hand carry a hat like that in case it gets deformed when shoved in a suitcase?

Anyway, this is all a coincidence 👀👀👀

[findingnemosworld]

𝐦𝐢𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐥𝐞𝐬 𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐞𝐧 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐭 𝐞𝐱𝐩𝐞𝐜𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐦 𝐭𝐨 - 𝐫𝐮́𝐛𝐞𝐧 𝐝𝐢𝐚𝐬

・𝐫𝐞𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐛𝐲: 𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐧𝐲𝐦𝐨𝐮𝐬

( 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫 𝐱 𝐑𝐮𝐛𝐞𝐧 𝐚𝐭 𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐦 𝐨𝐟 𝐩𝐮𝐛𝐥𝐢𝐜𝐢𝐭𝐲 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐬𝐡𝐞’𝐬 𝐞𝐱𝐩𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚 𝐛𝐚𝐛𝐲. 𝐒𝐡𝐞’𝐬 𝐭𝐢𝐫𝐞𝐝 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐛𝐚𝐛𝐲 𝐤𝐞𝐞𝐩𝐬 𝐤𝐢𝐜𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠, 𝐬𝐨 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐲 𝐠𝐞𝐭 𝐚 𝐪𝐮𝐢𝐞𝐭/𝐩𝐫𝐢𝐯𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐦𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭, 𝐑𝐮𝐛𝐞𝐧 𝐠𝐢𝐯𝐞𝐬 𝐛𝐚𝐛𝐲 𝐚 𝐩𝐞𝐩 𝐭𝐚𝐥𝐤 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐛𝐮𝐦𝐩 𝐟𝐥𝐮𝐟𝐟? )

𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫'𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞: 𝐞𝐧𝐣𝐨𝐲 𝐝𝐚𝐝𝐝𝐲 𝐫𝐮𝐛𝐞𝐧

( rúben, I'll have your babies, give me a chance )

Tonight was a very big night for Rúben, he was being honored by UEFA for his incredible work in Manchester City as well as his national team, and he along with his wife were going to attend - while he was adjusting the buttons of his shirt, he hears a soft thud followed by a groan which sent him flying out of the bathroom in a hurry to check, and there she was, his wife of two years who has been carrying their baby girl for nearly five months struggling to zip the dress she was wearing. " Baby, are you ok? "

She shoots him a glare, " Do I look ok? " she asks in a satirical tone.

Rúben was aware that it was her hormones talking so he smiled and made his way over to her, " What's wrong? "

She gestures to her bump, " Ask your daughter, she wants to join in on the celebration "

The Portuguese chuckles, kneeling down then placing his hands over her bump and it seemed that their baby knew, as she decided to kick once again which made him smile, " Princess " he said with a gentle tone, " Hi there, I know you're as happy as I am but we don't want to upset your Māe now do we? "

She smiles at the sight, threading her digits through his hair. " I'm definitely feeling the after effects "

" Tell you what princess, if you remain as quiet as you can. Tonight I'll tell you a story, the story of how a young boy from Amadora had somehow managed to win over the prettiest girl in the neighborhood he lived in " He states, looking up to his wife with a soft smile.

" I think she only listens to you " She said.

He stood up, and carefully turned her around to zip up her dress, he placed a soft kiss on her shoulder then said, " We can apologize and stay home, if you're tired "

She shakes her head in refusal, " I want to be there, to boast and brag about how my husband is the sexiest most talented defender Portugal has ever produced "

He groans in response, nuzzling his face in her neck " Babe, don't do this to me "

She giggles, " Come on handsome, I need help with my shoes "

They were finally dressed and ready to go, Before they enter the limo he looks at her. " If at any point, you feel uncomfortable you let me know and we go home " he said, " I mean it "

" I promise, we'll be ok " She assures him.

He nods, stroking her bump. " Remember princess, make sure Māe is happy at all costs "

She giggles and pecks his lips, " She already is "

_____________________________________________________________

Y/N and Rúben were seated next to Rodri and his girlfriend Laura, the latter had leant closer and gushed over Y/N's bump. " Did you two decide on a name yet? " she asked her, Y/N shakes her head with a soft smile, " Not yet, we did however decide to give her his mother's name as a middle name "

" I can send you over a few lists that I saved " Laura whispers with a giggle, " Rodrigo was the one who saved them and sent them to me "

" Aww, so cute, I am sure you two will have the cutest babies " Y/N gushes.

It was time for the ceremony to begin, and just as Rúben along with his Manchester City teammates stood up on the stage and were asked to give a few words, Rúben grabs the microphone to speak. " I would like to thank god, my family and every single person that has believed in my ability but most of all, I would like to thank the most hardworking person I know " he looks at her and beams, " My beautiful wife Y/N who's currently housing the greatest blessing I can ever hope for, our baby girl, without her - I wouldn't have been able to push through this year, so thank you "

Y/N claps her hands then mouths, " I love you "

Laura leans closer, " That was so cute "

" He wants to kill me " Y/N laughs.

Rúben was then lead back to his seat and smiled, " How are you feeling? "

" I'm feeling good and apparently so is your baby, she felt the love " She giggles.

He pecks her lips then strokes her belly, " That's all I can ask for, all these trophies mean nothing if I don't have you "

" Aw baby, I love you " She smiled tearfully.

" I love you too " He smiled.

[hypermania]

transcript of the full thread:

"A very long thread: To the League fans, We found out this news along with you on Friday. I see the pain and anger and worry out there, which for the LGBTQIA+ fans of the show is of course compounded by what’s happening across the country right now. #ALeagueOfTheirOwn

So the first and most important thing to say is: Before anything, before you fight for the show or each other, please take care of yourselves. Reach out to your community and ask for help if you need it. You aren’t alone. Please be kind to yourselves.

As I’ve been thinking about what’s happened, I come back to a quote from Penny Marshall’s film: “The hard is what makes it great.” Making this show is so hard and so great. There’s quite a bit to say about what’s been hard, but at this point that’s in the past.

Of course, if we have an avenue to do it well, we will continue the show, and I love seeing the noise you’re making in support of that. The noise matters!

And it’s hard for me to imagine there wouldn’t be a home for a show that thanks to you was in the Nielsen Top 10 for three weeks, was the top show on Amazon for a month and in the top five for six, that was recognized by critics as something special, that’s been recognized…

…with awards from GLAAD, HRC and a million other organizations, that was on a million year-end top ten lists, and that has a built in and deeply passionate audience.

Amazon is pursuing different kinds of programming, but to the rest of the world this show is a hit and has huge value and even greater potential. But first things first, we have to win this strike and get a fair deal before we can explore what comes next.

But for a moment, I want to talk about what happens if the world didn’t quite change quickly enough for you to have all the seasons of this show that we want to give you.

If we don’t find a good path forward, I will still know that League did what it came here to do and, in its own small way, changed the world.

And that’s because of all of you, and the light you continue to shine on the show — How you let it matter to you, how you let it become a mirror, how you let it change you.

I’ve never experienced a response to a show that’s as deep, personal, creative and meaningful as what the fans have done with League. When we were making the season 1, we all wondered and worried about whether people would accept it on its own terms next to the film.

They have, and you did that, and so much more. You lit up the internet on your first watch throughs of the show, when you realized where it was going (and made all of us laugh in the process).

You wrote enough fan fiction for 100 novels and created an outpouring of art and creativity that could fill its own museum — I’ve truly never seen anything like it.

You lifted up a 95 year old who had just come out of the closet and made her into a celebrity who gets recognized wherever she goes. Every time any member of the cast appears at anything, you turn it into a convention.

You stop Abbi wherever she goes, and though I’m a happily inconspicuous person, and you constantly find me and stop me and give me gifts that now have a shelf in my house.

When thousands of you appeared to see D’Arcy at the stage door of The Thanksgiving Play over its run, you turned it into the hottest queer bar in New York. You made Max’s suit and Chante’s beautiful performance into a movement.

A mob of you went to Pittsburgh and saw all of our locations. You dressed as the characters and made our characters into one of the biggest halloween costumes of last year.

You came out, you changed pronouns, you started living more openly, you gave sermons in church about the show, you opened bars, and you got a truly mind boggling number of tattoos that say “to the five” and “rob the bank.” What else am I forgetting? I'm sure you'll remind me.

But most importantly, you made a community, you found each other and found joy, which of course is what the show is about. In many more ways than I would ever have let myself imagine while we were making it, you literally bring the show to life every day.

Thank you for making our work mean something bigger. We’ve heard from so many different kinds of people around the world who are watching League.

But, in a time when all queer people are personally and politically under attack across the country and HRC has declared a “state of emergency,” my biggest fear is that the many queer fans of League will take this reversal as one more invalidation, one more blow, one more…

…effect of the general politicization of our identities. Most of us grew up feeling invisible, and as we gain strength, the predictable backlash forces are trying their hardest to get us to go back underground.

In case anyone needs to hear it: You are not small, niche, modest, off-putting or marginal, and neither are your stories. You are multitudes, you are building, and your stories are universal. You are the most rapidly growing audience and consumer group in this country.

You are powerful. You are the future, and the people who don’t recognize your importance now will feel be clamoring to catch up in a few years. As Chante said so beautifully when we received the Human Right Campaign Visionary award, you are the main characters. Be proud.

Be angry if you that’s how you feel, but know that we are going to win, and don’t ever let this moment or any other make you small. The biggest lesson of the characters in this show is that, in a world that had no space for them at all, they LIVED. (Continued)

They found love, they did the things they loved, they won. You’re doing the same thing, and just like them, you are heroes. We are still fighting for League. But whether we win or lose this one, I’m so proud.

From the time when we began working on the season, Abbi, Deta and I said to each other — Let’s not hold anything back, for as long as we get to be here, let’s do this the right way.

We got so many notes wondering if the exploration of the queer world of the 1940s or Max’s world would be better saved for season 2, if people needed to start somewhere a little more familiar. I’m so glad we didn’t listen, cause now I’m sitting here without any regrets.

And no matter what happens, the people behind League aren’t going anywhere. Give us a minute, we will be back with more for you to watch and read and feel. We’re going to win.

And you’re not going anywhere either, because what you’ve built and what you are is bigger than this show. It’s the story of our community, that comes to us through the hidden history that League shows just one small part of: The bars got raided and shut down.

But the people didn’t go anywhere, and they opened a new bar, and out of those spaces came music, cinema, dance, culture — What we now see as mainstream was birthed from the spaces our predecessors were forced to hide in. They made joy there."

[calzone-d]

Masterlist

Hi, I’m cal, and this is my masterlist! I write for Ted Lasso/Jason Sudeikis. My inbox is always open for requests or just to talk! I’ll write one-shots, blurbs, headcanons, or we can just bounce concepts off each other! I’d like to note that I am towards the end of nursing school, so I may not get to any asks immediately!

*Some thoughts/concepts/blurbs may not be linked here, but can be found by searching “ted lasso thoughts”, or “my writing.”

*Other tags I use: dad!ted, dad!jason, mom!reader, sub!ted, jason sudeikis rpf

*This blog contains NSFW content, 18+ only! I’m not responsible for the content you consume.

*I do not write OC’s, all of my fics are x reader

-Ted Lasso x Fem!Reader———————

One Shots

Movie Night (smut)

After celebrating Richmond’s latest win, Ted invites you back to his hotel room for a movie night. You don’t watch much of the movie.

Like Father, Like Son (fluff)

You wake up in the middle of the night to Ted and Henry being sick.

Couch Kisses (smut)

An imagine inspired by my post about kissing Ted’s bulge over his khakis.

Something New (smut)

You and Ted finally drabble into the dom/sub dynamic. (sub!ted, softdom!reader)

Reconnected (fluff)

After Ted and your daughter recover from being sick, they’re both ecstatic to see you again.

Nightmares (angst/fluff)

When Ted has a nightmare, feeling your baby kick calms him down.

Helping Hands (comfort/fluff)

You come home from a long day to dinner and a clean house, courtesy of Ted and Henry.

Accidents Happen (comfort/fluff)

Henry is still learning how to hold his new baby sister.

Close Call (angst/comfort)

Ted gets a call no one could’ve prepared him for while at work

Unplanned Sleepovers (angst/comfort/fluff)

Henry finds you crying and insists on spending the night with you, while also finding a new nickname for you. Ted comes home and joins the action.

Only You (smut)

You and Ted have a moment alone in a closet at Roy and Keeley’s wedding.

Always There (comfort/fluff/smut)

You have a heart to heart with Henry before comforting ted in a way that only you can.

Sunscreen (fluff)

You spend a little time flirting with Ted during a team beach day.

Growing (fluff)

A glimpse into a domestic morning with Ted, before a serious conversation ensues.

Headcanons/Drabbles

showering with ted

random HC about Ted taking care of you while you’re drunk, plus non-alcohol related domestic dad!Ted

Ted + your baby bump HC’s

Ted + books/reading HC’s

power outage with Ted & Henry

waking up next to Ted

Ted + your newborn baby girl HC’s

Ted comforting you when you’re hurt, sick, and sad.

giving Ted a blowjob

reader is worried Ted misses his old family, and he reassures her he doesn’t

Ted and reader on a break HCs

Ted and reader doing yoga HCs

being a couch potato with Ted HCs

giving ted a blowjob to help him relax HCs

reader snaps at Ted after a bad day

cockwarming with ted

Ted + reader w/ a stomachache HCs

reader sitting in Ted’s lap while he fingers her

ted & panty sniffing x reader

Multi-part Fics

Mild Misunderstandings (angst/fluff)

A stressful week begins to take its toll on you and Ted.

part one

part two

Lover’s Exploration (smut)

Ted takes interest in a previous sexual encounter you bring up, and wants to try it.

part one

part two (coming soon!!)

Prompt List Works

I don’t know how much longer I could’ve taken this..

-Jason Sudeikis x Fem!Reader——————-

One Shots

Taking Care (smut)

After a long two weeks of quickies, you and Jason find time to play with a new buttplug you ordered.

Riding Dirty (smut)

You ride Jason for the first time.

Quality Time (fluff)

When Jason gets injured, you spend some quality time with the kids.

Headcanons/Drabbles

jason eating reader out HCs

jason + praise kink + riding (nsfw)

Prompt List Works

wait, don’t go.. please..

breaking down mid-hug because they just needed it so much

-Kinktober 2023------

Mirror Sex (Jason Sudeikis x Fem!Reader)

Phone Sex (Ted Lasso x Fem!Reader)

Breeding Kink (Jason Sudeikis x Fem!Reader)

Overstimulation (Jason Sudeikis x Fem!Reader)

Pregnancy Kink (Ted Lasso x Fem!Reader)

Gentle Femdom (Ted Lasso x Fem!Reader)

Bondage/Edging/Toys Night (Jason Sudeikis x Fem!Reader)

Surprise kink!!! (Ted Lasso x Fem!Reader)

[c00kietin]

Since I probably won't be online as much tomorrow (December 25) for obvious reasons, I'll say this in advance and have it in queue for tomorrow.

MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL WHO READS THIS AND TO ALL A HAPPY NEW YEAR!!! (ALSO HAVE A GREAT HANUKKAH IF YOU CELEBRATE IT!!)

I probably won't list off all of my followers (nothing personal, just takes too long for my little brain) but to the people that have interacted with me: (VERY LONG POST)

@godofautism / @godofautismnumber2 - you are one of my first followers, and even with how many followers you have, you still talk with me and I'm so grateful for that. You are an amazing, friendly and a very fun person, never forget it! <33

@ofthefrogs - YOU. ARE SO KIND!!!!!!!! your drawings are so sweet and wholesome and bring a smile to my face- you as a whole bring a smile to my face. As I'm writing this, it's also your birthday- so happy birthday! May both your birthday and Christmas be loads of fun! :D

@taperecorder-gizmo - my dear guardian. My parent. I think you already know how much I love you. That first time you drew me, with your sona holding an octobunny, I was ecstatic. I immediately showed my sister, and she can tell you I danced like a leprechaun. And even a more recent time, when you drew Roxie, that had me squealing like crazy! I could probably write a Bible-length book on how much I love ya and how much of an amazing person you are, but I have other mutuals to talk about. Thank you so much for your kindness and your incredible art skills, and I love you loads!

@trashyandtiredsol - you were one of the firsts to become "my biggest fan" (as in liking/reblogging a bunch of my stuff) and you still are! I love your art as well (I'm so lucky to be friends with so much artists!!!) and I am so grateful for every like and reblog you've done on my posts. Love you loads, and thank you so much for your kindness.

@allmightyscroll-swag - AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA/pos!!!! You helped me show my ocs to people other than my sister, and to be honest, now I love drawing them! Every response you make has me giddy with excitement and smiling like a madman. Know that you are amazing and kind like all of my moots and you are more than welcome to tag me in your art too if you want to! <<33

@chiperti - Hi!!! I know we haven't chatted in a while, but just know I do really like talking to you (especially bout music hehehe)!!! Your art is so pretty and amazing and seeing you post new art always makes me excited! You have a superb taste in music, and one of the many super cool people I've met on Tumblr.

@a-had-matter - Like chiperti, we may not have chatted in a while, but talking to you is loads of fun as well! You're also probably one of the first people that I've had a fully blown conversation with- you and many other people help me talk a lot more, and I'm grateful for that! Thank you so much for all your friendliness, your kindness, and also have a merry Christmas. :]

@glastly - I love your art. I love your art. I love your art. Have I told you how much I love your art? BECAUSE I LOVE YOUR ART!!!! Not only that, but I am so thankful to have you as a mutual of mine and your compliments make me feel AMAZING! You are super kind and amazing and cool and- Merry Christmas!! :D

@t3ddysramblings - technically your other is following me (@newaccountinbio)- BUT STILL! I'm tagging you because I adore your art so much and having you respond to that Fell Sans I drew a good while back had me bouncing off of the walls!! You are a huge inspiration for me, because I think you already know how stunning your art is!

@deltaswapjevil - Yes, you! Like Sol, you've liked almost all of my stuff, to which I applaud you, Thank you so much for the support, and I appreciate all of your kindness. May your Christmas be a great one! <33

@annelostshoe - First of all, love your sona! Second of all, you are also one of my biggest fans according to Tumblr- you've liked and reblogged so much of my stuff, and I am grateful for all the support you've given me! :DD

@lumashoes - HELLO!!! You are one of my first followers, and I'm glad you're still with me! You are a very kind and friendly person, and I'm thankful to have you as my moot! Have a great Christmas!! <33

@gummy-worms-in-my-brain - The fact that you're following me still makes me giddy so much asdfggfgdfsddfgfhg- your art is so SO pretty, and that first time that you drew those Christmas cookies for me, that had me kicking my feet and squealing like a little girl- a very excited one! Thank you so much for all your compliments and support, I appreciate your kindness dearly. :>

@mikebeanz - Hello!! Back when I was starting out and had like 20 followers, I noticed how a good few of them were following you, As you do, I followed you too and I silently loved your content- if that makes sense lol. You're so kind, so friendly, funny and an amazing artist, I was like "damn. I wanna talk to that guy". And the fact that we're mutuals now makes me so happy. Thank you so much for your positivity that brings a smile to my face. <<333

*cracks knuckles and gets prepared for more typing, questioning what the limit is*

@mikey-rottmnt @ghosty-0w0 @angelosorangebandana - hope yall don't mind being grouped into one- but IRISH SQUAD!!! you all are so fun to be with and I love being on Whiteboard with you! @mikey-rottmnt, that time that you drew me made me the happiest bean on EARTH!! It was also one of the first fanart pieces I recieved, and I still adore it!! Thank you all so much for your kindness and positivity, and I hope you receive amazing presents this year!! :DD

@mellybabbles - you. make. me. sso. SO HAPPY!!! Like, really. I mean it. Talking to you gives me that boost of happy vibes that keep me going throughout the day, and I thank you so much for those lil "how are yous". You are all the positive adjectives!! Also, spectacular taste in birds ya kiwi lover!!!! <333

@crazed-rambler - congrats on the burning!! Like many of your other followers have said, you are an amazingly kind and awesome person that we are so grateful to have you as a friend! Never forget how incredible you are, and just before you type something like "I don't think so", or "X for Doubt", DON'T. YOU ARE AMAZING. NEVER TELL YOURSELF OTHERWISE.

@moonys-chaos - another fan!! Thank you so very much for your likes and reblogs, and doing that "going to jail because of your search history with @mikey-rottmnt" with ya made me laugh my ass off- it was very fun to me hehe. You are very cool, and I wish you a wonderful Christmas. :3

@oneshortlove - *gives you a million hugs* AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!! I LOVE YA SO MUCH!!! YOUR KIND WORDS, YOUR DRAWINGS, AH-they make me so, so happy!!! Your sona is adorable, and you are one of the nicest, sweetest people I've met on this platform! I hope your Christmas is a brilliant one and you have a wonderful new year!!

@goomykazoomy - hi!!! I hope that you're doing well!! Like a-had-matter, talking to you has helped me crawl out of my shell and talk more about myself to other people. Chatting with you is a blast, you are incredibly kind, nice and funny, and I love your art! Also, your sona is so cute and I love em sm :3 Have an amazing Christmas, friend!

@artistheworld - I know we're new to each other, but I'm gonna mention you here because of how kind you've already been to me- I love your art so much and I adore every compliment you give me! Have a very merry Christmas!!

Okay I'm sorry that I'm grouping up some of all but my creative juices are beginning to run out lol-

@sillyallthetime @clownpalette @hiro-doodlez @paintaya @m-iivy- HELLO??? HOW ARE WE MOOTS?! LIKE- ALL OF YOUR ARTWORK IS SO PRETTY AND I LOVE IT SO MUCH- all of your art styles, your colours, I adore it all! Thank you guys so much for following me, It makes me feel so happy. <3

@kanaede-kun @artsandstoriesandstuff @wishtale-blogs @little-creecher @little-silly-things @it-came-from-mount-ebott @italic-does-random-shit @m3l0man14c @panda-of-the-trash @minophlia @largefound @lemonmint-the-neko @spikeygrrl @qeelovestea @holdmyteaplease @motherarts @justmesadlysry- Imma say it right now- we may not interact with each other a lot, but I platonically love yall. Like. Seriously. You are amazing people and I love your content, not to mention how kind you all are. I may have used that word a lot now, but I mean it every single time. @artsandstoriesandstuff, I want to thank you as well for drawing Roxie, for that made me squeal and giggle and smile and all sorts of happy things!! I hope all of your Christmases are wonderful and fun and that you may have a great 2024. <3333

AND NOW, TO MY FOLLOWERS THAT I MAY NOT HAVE MENTIONED ON MY LIST- c'mere. I appreciate you all. Every like and reblog you do, I can see it (which sounds creepy but I mean it in a positive way lol). I love and appreciate all of your support, really. Whether your content is art, talking or simply reblogs, I love you all and what you do, I am so lucky to have amazing people like you enjoying my content, and you all deserve the best. Pretend I'm handing you a fuzzy blanket and a plate of cookies, because that's what you deserve.

Silly Tumblr won't let me add more, so I am now done. Mic drop.