#and while the late-game execution was far from ideal

[realtapiocafan]

pretty good player imo

[cutie4me]

Best Soukoku Fanfics That Bring Immense Nostalgia!

Someone on YouTube asked for recommendations for Soukoku fics so how could I give up such an opportunity to share some of my all time favourites?! Some of them will make you cry. Some of them will make you smile. But most importantly, the immense wave of nostalgia you’ll feel after reading some of these fics are surreal! I swear, sometimes I wish I’d forget about these fics just so I could rediscover and read them all over again! All these amazing works are on AO3 so please check them out and support the authors! I’ll continue to update this each time I find a new SKK fanfic!

“Overturn even the heavens and the earth” by sssoukoku

Chuuya uses corruption but Dazai’s too late to save him, or is he?

“My skull crown” by YunaYamiMouto

Mori is dead so Dazai has to go back to PM and take the throne as the new PM boss.

“Baby Executive” by BlowingYourMind

Chuuya gets turned into a child and goes through the life stages growing older under Dazai’s care, Dazai manages to develop empathy and a widespread of new emotions around each new stage of Chuuya. (Cross posted on Wattpad!)

“I Was Screaming Your Name Through The Radio” by ElectricSplatter

I’ve not read this yet but it’s really popular and has a lot of positive reviews from what I’ve heard. It’s a rockstar/band AU but it’s super long, probably the longest one here.

“The God and his Vessel” by Churroburrito

Arahabaki lives in Chuuya and they can interact and sometime Arahabaki can come out to talk to people. Arahabaki is surprisingly sweet and overprotective of Chuuya, quite like an older brother. (I absolutely adore Arahabaki and Chuuya’s dynamic in this fic!)

“Silly delusions” by Grinch1234

Arahabaki and Chuuya are one person and Arahabaki is a God stuck in a human’s body confused with how humanity works. He tries on many occasions to convince Dazai that he is a god to only one time in which Dazai actually believes him.

“I’ll always come for Chuuya” by toucheslikethesun

Dazai and Chuuya back in PM and Dazai tries to distance himself with Chuuya cuz of his feelings to the point Chuuya loses trust in him and thinks Dazai’s grown bored of him because of his new friend, Odasaku.

“We Are Never Ever, Ever Getting Back Together (Right?)” by sabiEMr

ADA and PM do an exchange thing where Chuuya works at ADA for a while and Atsushi works at PM. Chuuya tried to get over his relationship with his ex Dazai but it’s not really ideal when you’re now stuck with your ex at his workplace.

“Unexpected” by lemoncandy751

Soukoku get paired together for a project and they hate each other… except when they start to fall for each other. Well that was unexpected!

“It takes two, to create a whole” by X_DRAMA_QUEEN_X

Roommates/College AU. Dazai’s a player and Chuuya gets stuck being his roommate and they absolutely despise each other with a burning passion. Chuuya gets a little too close to Fyodor and doesn’t know who to trust anymore. Is it Dazai playing the mind games to make Chuuya fall for him or is it Fyodor? (It’s over on Wattpad as well!)

“If we can’t run together, why did we from the start?” by amythecinnabunny

Immortal Dazai x multiple reincarnation of Chuuya. Dazai loves each of them differently and learns to find and fall for each Chuuya reincarnation again and again! (I cried too much with the angsty ending of this. Lots of character deaths).

“Inseparable” by milwritescausewhynot

Highschool AU where Chuuya and Dazai have known each other for 12 years and are practically inseparable! They love to pull pranks on each other but when a certain prank of Dazai’s is taken too far that it puts Chuuya’s life at risk they must face the consequences of being apart for each other’s safety (due to Dazai’s guilt) yet still yearning for each other.

“Pretty Little Thing” by wallows_4

Chuuya, an assassin, is assigned a job to kill the Prince of a very wealthy and successful kingdom. Chuuya walks in thinking this will be easy when no threats are present, but the next thing he knows everything is dark. When he wakes up again, he is "interrogated" by three idiots. And the stupid prince is insistent on him being his personal pet!

“Of Libraries and Liberties” by Grinch1234

Chuuya Nakahara is the escaped government experiment known as A5158 seeking refuge as the librarian of his own little library sanctuary. Osamu Dazai is the notorious boss of the Port Mafia and by some illogical miracle, they manage to cross paths.

“Still, Still, Still” by icedlightroast

Actor/popstar Dazai x Rockstar Chuuya idustrial rivals AU! After a public drunken tweet confession professing his true feelings for his rival, Chuuya has no choice but to play the ploy of fake dating his rival, Dazai, to help this mess he’s made in his career. Except Dazai is a completely incompetent asshole who Chuuya can’t help but hate himself for falling for. Besides, there’s more to Dazai that meets the eye.

“Untainted Memories” by serenathea

BEAST! Chuuya shares his memories and emotions with the original Chuuya, and Dazai has to fix the mess and pain he has created.

“I can’t dare to dream about you anymore” by kiroiimye

High school AU where Dazai and Chuuya have been best friends and next-door neighbors since childhood, never seen apart despite their differing, respective lifestyles as the genius class president and the school’s beloved soccer star. Everything is perfect, except for the fact that Chuuya’s been in love with Dazai since forever and Dazai has a girlfriend.

“Always Yours” by Wellthathappened (Cataclysmic_Calamity)

Kingdom + Omegaverse AU where Dazai has been betrothed to Chuuya since they were both children—an arrangement that never particularly interested him—until their wedding night, when he sees the omega’s face for the first time. (EXPLICIT Rating for NSFW scenes but you can skip those if you wish)

“The Shepard and His Shadow” by LynyrdLionheart

Everyone knows the monster in the woods is why the village suffers a lack of resources. It's been that way for centuries. Then Dazai meets the monster, and everything he knew turns out to be a lie.

“The Life We Could've Lived” by Xena_Lemon

A very confused Dazai wakes up in a Highschool AU instead of his usual Agency dorm room. And strangely enough, Chuuya’s the only one who seems to be from his world (him and the mysterious girl who keeps watching them).

“Four Years Ago, Four Years Later” by Nightingale231

Chuuya knows before Dazai, does, really, that the younger man will run. Before anything - even before Mori and the home he has carved for himself in the Port Mafia - he will take Dazai's side where it matters. He hates the mackerel, he does; yet he wants Dazai to follow the goals that Odasaku set for him, because he… (loves him).

“Silver Claws, Silver Tongue” by CandiWolfe

In which Chuuya gets turned into a cat whilst on a mission and (unwillingly) seeks the misfortune of Dazai’s help to not only temporarily nullify the ability but to track down the bastard who dared turn him into a wretched feline. Except doing so is easier said than done. Especially when they’re from a whole new foreign organisation.

“How To Woo Your Husband in Seven Days” by moonlitsorrows

When Dazai accidentally performs a grave accident that angers his precious chibi husband and forces him out of their shared apartment and out onto the streets, he tries his hand at his backup operation of “How to Woo your husband in seven days” with seven articulate plans in hopes that it would finally convince Chuuya to invite him back home. Except each plan just seems to fail and give the redhead an even bigger blooming headache. Plan 7 was the last straw. Maybe Chuuya should finally invest in some long awaited (and deserved) divorce papers after such a hellish week of putting up with that stupid mackerel of a husband’s BS.

“Another Love” by infernaa

Dazai desperately wanted to get rid of everything dark and ugly in his life. Even if it meant leaving his love for Chuuya behind. (Slight Sigma x Dazai).

“When Will You Confess?” by Chuchu_hua

Dazai and Chuuya have been best friends since childhood. One day, Dazai gets himself a girlfriend and Chuuya feels jealous. He then realises he has feelings for his best friend, but doesn’t want to confess. One night under the stars plus the influence of wine becomes one heated make out session. The two continue to have random make out sessions, but don’t think to put a label on their relationship. One school dance is what it took for Dazai to grow a pair and finally admit his feelings out loud.

“Empire of Dirt” by arkastadt

Artist Dazai's bored and lives in a mansion, Mechanic Chuuya's the mysterious garden boy working for his family, and fate brings them together over and over again only to rip them apart. (Super angsty major character death! You have been warned! EXPLICIT Rated for NSFW).

“They said the eyes are the windows to the soul.” by Aprusalve

5+1 fic of Kyouka as she observed Soukoku and tried to guess their relationship and one time she finally decided to ask.

“catch me once, catch me twice” by seedus

Chuuya gets stuck in an ability loop where he’s basically wiped out of existence and Dazai decides to become the Demon Prodigy once more to hunt down the ability user responsible for daring to target his dog and bring him back.

“Something More Than A One Night Stand” by ShireHorses

It was supposed to be a one night stand and nothing more. The last thing Dazai expected was to catch feelings for Chuuya. Much less hurt him so badly by saying the night they spent had meant nothing. It hadn’t mattered when Dazai had said that to all the previous women he’d slept with so why did it pain him so much to see Chuuya cry and act so cold? (EXPLICIT Rated for NSFW scenes).

“build a temple in me” by oursorrows

Dazai wants to surprise his husband, Chuuya, on their one year anniversary, and he can't help falling in love all over again. (EXPLICIT Rated for NSFW scene).

“Tempus Fugit” by Imabukuhoe

Teenage Soukoku time travel to a their future are in for the shock of their life as they witness many (good) things they never expected to happen in their lives- and that they’re gay for each other but we don’t talk about that just yet. (EXPLICIT Rated for NSFW scenes! Cross posted on Wattpad as well! It’s angsty midway through but with a happy ending!).

“No Longer Human” by Wolf___Spirit

When a stranger starts stealing people's abilities, the ADA and the Port Mafia team up to figure it out. However, something goes wrong and Dazai loses his ability in the process. The big problem? His ability not only nullified the abilities of others, but also his own emotions. And now, for the first time in his life, Dazai has emotions, chaotic and in turmoil. In the midst of this identity crisis, Dazai sets out to explore the world with Chuuya as his grumpy bodyguard, only to discover that he has never felt so...alive. And then they find out that if they don't find a way to give him back his ability, Dazai will die within two weeks. In a race against time, chaos ensues.

“Twisted Ties” by Cutie_4Me

Serial Killer Chuuya tries to hunt down his stalker who's been stalking him by breaking into his apartment only to be met with an unexpected and (un)pleasant surprise. (Yes- I’m shamelessly promoting my own fic)

"Backstage Pass" by the_most_unhappy

When world-famous violinist Dazai Osamu announces his early retirement, a part of him is sure he will never love music again. He’s in his twenties, but he’s already tired of everything. Meanwhile, up-and-coming frontman Nakahara Chuuya is everything Dazai is not: reckless, smug, and a rockstar. They’re total opposites. They could never fall in love, right? (Implied Sexual Content But Nothing Explicit)

"More like a crash" by Jickas

Chuuya loses his memory and Dazai decides this will be a great opportunity to mess with him. But what happens when he goes a little too far and old feelings begin to resurface?

"Everything or Nothing" by Wellthathappened (Cataclysmic_Calamity)

College AU where Chuuya finds out that the boy he drunkenly made out with the night of orientation is his new roommate. His arrogant, smug, very straight roommate. And the boys are each convinced the other is trying to ruin their life by making them go absolutely insane. But of course, things don't go as planned and they somehow ended up with the typical fuck buddies arrangement. Feelings become more complex and they both soon find that the other is hiding something, a secret that could very much rupture everything in their relationship. (EXPLICIT Rated for multiple NSFW scenes and sexual exploration).

^Based off the song 'Everything or Nothing' by Picture This.

"Lost in Translation (Found in Love)" by archerwrites

Dazai is convinced (forced) to join his friends for a year spent in Paris, and he doesn't know a word of French. Chuuya is just hoping to get through school without any strange encounters, and he doesn't know a word of Japanese. They collide (literally) and the situation devolves from there. They figure it out. Falling in love in Paris is a very romantic cliche, after all. Even if there's a language barrier between them.

“Teenage Dream” by Badwolf36

Dazai sees Chuuya looking at a high school, unsure how he feels that he never got the chance to go since the Port Mafia hired tutors. Dazai, despite mocking him, sort of feels the same. Which is how they end up on a high school rooftop in stolen uniforms, eating melon bread during class hours, and it’s the happiest either of them has been in a long time, even if neither of them will admit it.

“Music To My Ears” by bluemango0406

Dazai is having a hard time coming up with a new piece that has a strict deadline. Lucky for Dazai, his husband, Chuuya, knows exactly what to do to help Dazai out- by getting himself fucked on a piano. (EXPLICIT Rated for NSFW scene!).

“at the sight of you” by taintedlight

Dazai Osamu swears that Nakahara Chuuya is only his friend-with-benefits, until he accidentally stays the night and wakes up to the breathtaking sight of Chuuya in the morning, and all of a sudden Chuuya is more than just his fuck buddy. (IMPLIED SEXUAL CONTENT).

“Our little fantasy worlds” by Izu (soaringivy)

14 year old Soukoku find out they both like writing stories. They also find out they both like reading each other's stories (and that they have feelings for each other too).

“Pay For It�� by SevenSnowflakes

Dazai comes up with an ingenious plan to pay for Chuuya's extravagant birthday dinner involving an unsuspecting Atsushi. Will Chuuya find out the truth of how Dazai just so manages to sneak himself out of this one? (EXPLICIT Rated for NSFW scene!).

“We Met Again” by Redd (Blurryface1304)

In which, following the events of BEAST, Chūya finds the book and, with the help of Odasaku, writes an alternate universe where he meets Dazai under more 'normal' circumstances.

“Just Know I loved You All Along” by Kryptonian_in_Winterfell

In which Dazai has anterograde amnesia after an accident and wakes up in a stranger’s bed, with no recollection of almost 6 years of his past but apparently this stranger is his husband. At least he finds his stranger husband cute.

“The art of deceiving you” by Alheenaa

What if Dazai accidentally kissed Chuuya during their first encounter, nullifying his gravity control? And since then, he has always lied to him, claiming that his ability only activates through a kiss and not simply by touching him. Chuuya never doubted it because Dazai always went to kiss him whenever he wanted to deactivate his ability.

“More like a crash” by Jickas

Where Chuuya loses his memory and Dazai decides this will be a great opportunity to mess with him. But what happens when he goes a little too far?

“(take me back to) the night we met” by morbidly_dazed & straysolace

Dazai and Chuuya decided to celebrate their anniversary in a different way this year to spice things up a bit but they end up getting way too emotional.

“Lost All Judgement” by todxrxki

After a momentary lapse in judgment, high school student Chuuya ends up having to pretend to date his enemy Dazai to get Tachihara off of his back - and quickly finds it's nowhere as bad as he'd imagined.

“sleepless nights” by huahuapain

Chuuya can't sleep so he thinks about his existence as a result but luckily Dazai is there to help him fall asleep.

“We bloomed in darkness, we'll flourish in the light” by chxxrychuu

After the death of the Flags, Chuuya leaves the Mafia. Soon, Dazai follows behind after Odasaku's death. What happens when the two meet at the Armed Detective Agency?

“Shadows at the Corner of our Eyes” by ayyartee

Role reversal AU where Dazai never left the Mafia and taken over as boss and Chuuya left instead and ended up in the agency.

“so if I survive, then I'll see you tomorrow” by prettysicknasty

This was far from the first time Dazai had to spend time in a mental institution. The inpatient facility was more like a second home at this point. He wasn't expecting anything different from usual when he was admitted, but when a fiery redheaded roommate is thrown into his usually dull and monochrome life, suddenly it doesn't seem so boring anymore. (Mental Institution AU).

“A Lesson In Thorns” by arkastadt

AU in which king of the sheep Chuuya has to marry port mafia boss Dazai to get one of his people out of the mafia’s clutches, only many things don’t go as planned and Chuuya ends up falling for Dazai hard whilst getting destroyed in the process. (Super angsty temporary major character death! EXPLICIT Rated for NSFW).

“Between The Lines” by localoser

After years of no contact, Fashion designer Chuuya Nakahara finds himself on the doorstep of his greatest enemy and, foremost, first love, new arising bestselling author Dazai, with a rather interesting book in his hands about their past.

“open secret” by sunbaemint

All the times when Chuuya tries to bribe everyone in the ADA or PM who accidentally finds out about his relationship with Dazai, and the one time when he doesn't have to.

“The (not so) perfect pair” by Silaswastaken

In another universe where soulmates exist and are identified by marks in the form of whatever injury your partner has- Chuuya Nakahara is about to turn 16, and his best friend Dazai has been endlessly teasing him over the prospect of a mark. However, when he wakes up on his birthday covered in light blue lines he is unsure what to do, or how to approach identifying his soulmate, and his best friend has been acting in increasingly concerning ways since being told about the marks. OR: What do you do when your covered in the evidence of your soulmates self harm, and your bandaged best friend (who you are definitely NOT in love with) seems to be breaking at the seams?

“The Philosophy of Death and Dying” by imnotpoppunk

Omega Nakahara Chuuya is working as a Ph.D. candidate in the Philosophy Department this semester, and he's not about to let the rumors about how unhinged his supervisor, Dr. Dazai Osamu, is get to his head. But no one could have warned him that the alpha's scent would be so incredible, or that it would change Chuuya's life forever. (EXPLICIT Rated for NSFW scenes).

“the house of red leaves” by setosdarkness

Renowned novelist Dazai Osamu goes to a rumored haunted mansion in the countryside in order to find inspiration for his next novel. There he finds Chuuya, a fox youkai who’s been guarding that mansion over several centuries. With the same inevitability of leaves that fall in autumn, inevitably, the two of them fall in love. (EXPLICIT Rated for NSFW scenes).

“foiled fables” by anticide

Chuuya uncovers the harrowing tale of the nine-tailed fox (Dazai) and lives to tell the tale. (EXPLICIT Rated for NSFW scenes).

“Extracurricular Activities” by black00cat

After a one year delay to his plans, Nakahara Chuuya, aged 19 and soon to turn 20, finally starts his dream university life as a freshly baked literature student. It’s going to be perfect because he will make it so. That is, of course, if he manages to pass the module led by the Demon Prodigy. The youngest professor of their generation and the famous author: Dazai Osamu. (EXPLICIT Rated for NSFW scenes). ONGOING

“how to bag a boyfriend, ft. dazai osamu's atrocious customer service” by littencloud9

College/coffee shop AU where barista Dazai’s exe. stops working one day when he sees Chuuya for the first time walk into the cafe he works at.

[thg-rcg-simps]

You never had a chance against fate – Mydei’s loathed ascend to godhood

Sooo, as the 3.2 patch is approaching, obviously I had waited so long till writing about our beloved Lion King. It was totally not procrastination, executive disfunction or the fact we played the patch rather late, no no it was planned like this from the get go.

And I will surely not get lost in the trauma or similarities to our boy Jing Yuan, hehe

Lean back, take some snaks, this shall be long ^^

[SPOILERS for the Mydei storyline and the 3.1 patch as a whole]

(Art doesn't belong to me)

Where do I begin? Where it went wrong? Where it began? When it ended? Or when the story throws us in since last patch?

I decide for the latter, as it’s more dramatic for a start. Or so the game devs thought for sure while making this warrior's entire life journey.

So, we are at the most secret place Amphoreus possesses and we conveniently can access from our bath-chamber, before the Titans. Which are still busy with our isekai protagonist, which wants to obtain the coreflame of Strife. Nikador has fallen, therefore a new demigod had to be born.

For a short moment in 3.0 we really thought that Phainon would get the coreflame and become Strife, tilting the whole theory of which (known) character would presumably get which of the Titans coreflames. But he’s ✨special��, not just in the way that he has a husband with a white lion, no no he’s the Hero. But…I drift away, this is not about the white-blue haired slightly dumb Phainon, but his edgy depressed traumatized counterpart.

And because Aglaea is who she is and Trinnon lost connection to Phainon, it was clear, something had to happen. Obviously, we choose the most dangerous path, or at least this is what it was described at in the end of 3.0 but apparently it’s fine. I mean, they don’t know it but we are far from being truly alive and Mydei can’t truly die, so I suppose it makes sense to send us to fetch him.

In Nikador’s trial a person faces their worst fears, having to fight against them. And in all Mydei-Phainon fashion, his worst fear is connected to Phainon, his loss and his people.

Anyways, we get Phainon, drag him back to safety, or well out of a very possible death, and get a black screen, only to find out we have forced Phainon into resting and bugging Mydei about the coreflame. They haven’t done that for awhile and I’m glad it’s not a big occurrence in this patch but this one was very…hard and random ^^’’

While Dan Heng is having deep thoughts about the black tide and corruption like problems could be a problem of a Stellaron (or a simulation) because, alas we are still in Star Rail and this is kinda the theme, Tribbie is speaking with Mydei since she worries about his worrying for Phainon. He brushes her off and tells her yet again there is no word for “fear” in the Kremnoan language and telling her he knows about the planned idea for him to become Strife, but asked if he could first talk with his people.

I want to dwelve on the fact how incredibly worried Tribbie is and even going so far to say she will be there for him regardless of his decision, especially regarding his crown. But this will be part of a later post about Lady Tribios herself.

Anyways, our prince who does not want to be one, goes around Okhema questioning multiple Kremnoans, from children to elders the answers were all alike, they want to return “home”, hoping for a King and new battlefields. This does not sit right with Mydei, who is only more determined to not become King. Or the idealization of Strife. Or the successor of his late father.

You see, his father was not a nice man. First there was the whole ordeal of splitting Nikador, driving him basically insane as they tried to drag them in a human vessel or simply lock them away, making a god their marionette. Then he got the amazing idea of murdering his one and only child. He does say it’s to end the bloodshed, but he also says it’s because of Nikador. So maybe he wanted to do good…but he wanted to end bloodshed with more bloodshed and by murdering his wife, so I don’t really think that worked out. His son did end it however somehow, so…plan successfully failed?

Mydei was thrown in the River of Souls in which he got his blessing and curse by the gods, immortality. A gift he would often wish he did not possess. Especially because there was no one worth living for.

Here comes a problem tho, it’s a time one. Amphoreus in itself is a fine world, it has the chance to be even amazing, some characters being written just sooo well. But it does remind us a lot of Belabog, and with that time problems are apparently also a thing again. Not as big as Servals, but how old is Mydei?? And how old was he when he was thrown in the River of Souls? Because at first it seemed like he was a baby, but that couldn’t add up since he remembered his mother. We also don’t really know how long he was in the River or where he got out and how he then found his loyal comrades or was taught by Krateros or Verax Leo. HoYo, I plead with you, make sense!

What we do know, however, is that he had 5 very loyal and close friends named Hephaestion, Perdikkas, Leonnius, Ptolemy, Peucesta, which stayed, lived and fought together till the very end.

(Art doesn't belong to me)

We also know that this group of soldiers were relatively rebellious towards the Kremnoan standards and were trying to change what Kremnoan even are. Because they are not just senseless beast attacking and fighting, dying in honor of being a warrior, no they are loyal strong friends who fight for their comrades and live for the fallen. They are so much more but bloodshed crazy fighters, as painted by both many Kremnoans and other natives to Amphoreus.

This is a theme and is quite interesting, since some of the mentioned comrades of our dear crown prince, are not even active fighters, and through the Verax Leo (I terribly want to know if they are all the same or is each one a separate lion, which is a big possibility since the one Lion that was Mydei’s greatest teacher, is insinuated to die) we know this is not a one time occurrence. Kremnoan people were not just fighters, they were as varied as any other people we meet on the planet. They all just were Nikadors followers and inhered Strife in one way or another. And not everything has to be about the brutality. In fact, when we go with Trianne to see the past of Castrum Kremnos many of the people even in the central area at the time of this big spectacle made by the King, not all were fighters.

It's very interesting to see how Mydei is so extremely wanting and wishing to prove the stereotypes painted by his father and just the general public about his home and his people, wrong. He wants to make them see there is nothing heroic of dying or of wishing for war to fight in. He wants them to see that if they do what they have done before they will eventually just die out and nothing will be even left. It’s an honor thing. But the honor is misplaced.

Mydei spends his entire life fighting for those people who are extremely ungrateful for any of his attempts to save them from their own doom. And no one is even…slightly thankful or thinks of his sacrifices made for and only for his people. His friends. His mother. The only thing he ever knew was violence and how Strife works. The only thing to his name beside a title he hated, was the fact he is Kremnoan. He’s proud of being one. He reminds us, as the Trailblaizer just like the other Crysos Heirs, that he is proud of being Kremnoan. But he is not at same time. Because of what it became.

See, no matter what he does, or what he wishes to do because he sees father than those close minded people, his efforts should be considered heroic, but are said to be foolish. Because his so called people, like the stereotypes. Like to go to war. Like to fight. Like to pretend this is a heroic thing to do even tho right now, there are much bigger problems than stupid little conflicts escalating. People want to go home, not because they miss the place, or the memories with it, no they miss the violence. And the praise they got out of it. They miss the slaughter. And they miss being encouraged for it.

The Kremnoan language is vast we learn, but fighting abilities are valued higher than knowledge. Kremnoan have such a big history outside of their so called heroic wars. There are so many words and stories. So many that one could say the Kremnoan language has no words at all.

So of course, the only possible way to safe his people, was, to kill them. Not personally, just end them. Metaphorically, and actually. Mydei takes on the crown, only to end it. He takes Strife, so he can take it away, destroy its bloody claws plastered around his folk no matter how young.

And I think this is the most fitting things he could’ve done. The only thing that actually would work. Make his people listen. Make them understand. Or at least he hopes so.

They might hate him as a King, but they hated him as the crown prince that refused the crown anyways, those who would hate him would do anyways. He does the right thing, he ends the agony being associated with his blood. In his mind it’s a fair deal, he’ll die for his people. Over and over and over till the end. Till the Black tide might consume him. Till the world would come to an end as well. He would die as a true Kremnoan. As Mydeimos, son of Gorgo.

His fate, the prophecy, as he thought he could unrun it, was always ending exactly like this

(Art doesn't belong to me, but I dig the duo/quatro)

Of course this is not the end of the story, there is actually much more to it, like the fact that Mydei was done in mere hours (max) with Nikadors trial (in comparison Phainon was there for days and couldn’t get past them), the fact that Phainon and Mydei are as official as the other very straight pairings, the fact that his former teacher, and biggest opposer to what he did, Krateros wanting to take on the coreflame himself, kidnapping Trinnon and later “repaying” them with trying to save Trianne as she feel because of the Reaper.

Or well…the last conversation he has with Castorice before parting to Castrum Kremnos about death. About her abilities probably even cutting through his immortality. I know this is all foreshadowing so we all drool over the fact we can literally pull her as this post goes up, but, I think most people still underestimate her so I thought to throw that in.

Of course, it’s absolutely heartwretching that he can’t even properly stay for the goodbye ceremony for Trianne, even though he is absolutely loving this small adorable readhead trio. It’s not mentioned with words as much but Mydei and Tribbie (as much as the others) share a bond where they would care a lot for the other. As much as Tribbie, as the teacher, is caring and very affectionate towards all, with Mydei is special and very heartwarming (but more on that in her post, also yes I know she is special with everybody).

If you ask us, I have to say that this patch is by far the better one of the two we had for this world. Of course, I extremely miss Herta, I think it’s very displeasent that the main crew is voicless as it disrupts the experience (especially for the next patch, I fear the worst when they become more relevant than just Dan Heng), but the writing and character building is amazing! I love how they handled Mydei (and Tribbie). I think they portrayed him as a person perfectly and tho we find it more than cheap to shush him to the side with having him fight for an eternity, so he disappears off the visual story line, it kinda fits his being. So, we’re still very happy with this side of the story, at least it was told properly, in a ways to make us understand too.

I mean, how could we not, it’s a beige haired man with a lion and a pretty traumatic backstory, that fights similarly to our Blady just more unpredictable and more chaotic (and less grumpy when being healed).

Anyways, thanks for reading this all, have a cookie 🍪, may beige haired hot lion husbandos be with you ^^

-TakumiHairGuy & RikkaCatGirlbut

[mysterious-prophetess]

Metaphor: ReFantzaio—Parallels and Foils

This is going to get into spoiler territory, so I'll put those parts below a read more.

In most fiction, there is usually one obvious parallel set up between our Protagonist and his main Antagonist.

Metaphor is no exception. Will/The Protagonist and Louis serve as excellent foils to one another, especially after some late-game reveals show just how closely they mirror each other.

Another set of foils are Maria Alces and Cirisium Zorba. This is made more ironic when you consider that Maria's follower bond gives rise to the Healer Archetype Line and Zorba is a Necromancer.

Maria and Zorba's parallels are interesting because Zorba is what Maria might have grown up to be had she been left on her own without others helping her find her place.

Like Maria, Zorba is of mixed heritage—he being half-clemar and half-mustari while Maria is half-rhoag and half-ishkia.

Like Maria, his status is blatantly obvious as he displays visible marks of his mixed heritage— such as the third eye of the mustari but a single solitary horn from his clemar side. Maria's single pair of wings give away her ishikia heritage, and also give away that she is only half-ishkia from it being a single pair (we never see her ears, but I assume they're pointed like Grius's were).

However, where she found family and acceptance, Zorba only ever found a dark and twisted version of that with Louis and his patronage to the point of being so utterly devoted to a man who lacks the capacity to see beyond his own aims.

Now we circle back to Will/the Protagonist and Louis. Spoilers to follow. You have been warned.

Let's get this out of the way.

Both are of Eldan descent and have connections to both the Elda and More/Hythlodeus V, losing family to the burning of the Elda Village and being inspired by the Fantasy Novel.

Both can inspire others. Neither gives a damn about what tribe someone is.

Both are skilled at magic, albeit Louis is far more powerful in this regard; keep in mind that Will/the Protagonist comes pretty damn far in power level in FOUR MONTHS. Who knows how much closer the fight might have been had Will had the time to train prior.

I digress. Both have ideals they refuse to back down from. It's in executing their ideals where they differ the most. That, and Will wants to help everyone and Louis will only help those who can help themselves.

Will/the Protagonist has had the deck stacked against him, almost as much as Louis, and they even share the same traumatic experiences to a degree.

Yet, Will held on to his desire to make the world a better place in spite of its massive flaws and would work to create the world of his ideals, while Louis never escaped the flames of that night and only ever saw destruction as the solution.

Louis sees fantasy and ideals like Will's as lies because he was failed by More/Hythlodeus V when the King gave up on life (basically) after the cursing of The Prince/Will.

Will sees fantasy as inspiration despite More/Hythlodeus V giving up on the world and—by extension Will—until Will has to show his father's own vestige More that he was holding firm to his ideals, unlike More/Hythlodeus V.

Will finds the strength to keep believing, whereas Louis sees belief as a weakness to be stamped out (see his hatred of the Sanctist Church beyond his legitimate grievances with their leader attempting the genocide of Louis's people).

Will also shares some parallels with Maria and Zorba because, like them, he is actually of mixed heritage—half-clemar and half-elda. He can easily pass as just elda, but that's not much better for him considering how the elda are treated. However, because the game doesn't touch much on this, all I can point out is Maria and Zorba show different ways Will's own life might have turned out, but the same could be said of his parallel with Louis.

In the end, it's that Will has friends (in true POWER OF FRIENDSHIP) and the strength to keep going and stick to his ideals that allows him to triumph over Louis.

Yet, it's so easy to see where Will could have become Louis (or even Zorba).

[smehur]

thank you for taking the time to provide the context i lacked about EA wyll and the changes to his story. i deliberately said in my first response that my opinion is based on the game alone because i don't know much about EA or have any other sources of insight. having a broader context can indeed change one's outlook. but i believe it is entirely fair to judge the game as it was on release, because the earlier versions were rejected drafts, not the intended final product.

obviously, only the authors themselves could confirm or deny the intentionality of the connection between wyll and balduran. it's a potent and elegant connection, so yes, i admit it's possible it was intentional and poorly executed. but i remain unconvinced that this is what happened.

like you said, all of act 3 is vacuous - we've all felt it. yet in some regards it's also overwhelming (i mean the sheer amount of content in main and side quests). i heard that there was supposed to be a whole other area, the upper city, that was cut from the game late in the development, affecting various companion quests (karlach's, astarion's - why the entrance to cazador's palace is so weirdly obscure - and undoubtedly wyll's too). as far as i know, the end of karlach's quest was seriously reworked in one of the early patches (just about the time i got the game) to address this. i don't know if the issues with her quest were comparable with the issues you find with wyll's quest, but my point here is, if wyll's quest was in some way unfinished due to act 3 compression and other changes throughout the game, there's hope it too will eventually be fixed. and if it doesn't get fixed, i think that'll be in confirmation of my view - that it doesn't suffer from poor execution but from a lack of ambition.

i actually hope i'm wrong. the disparity in the amount of content between companions is staggering, and it's disturbing that the black companion was among those with the least content. so while we may disagree on whether or not the balduran connection was planned or emergent, i definitely agree that wyll's quest deserves polishing (ideally, some additions too), and that this should have a higher priority than the diversity of kisses.

whoever made the decision to demote the resolution to wyll's story to a subquest is either unqualified to even be making that decision and should be replaced, or they are qualified, and should be disposed of, because they have demonstrated that they are not even familiar with the material they are making a decision about.

i've spoken about the wyrmway before, and as I said then, if there was anything that this quest needed, it was to be expanded. after rereading my original commentary, I decided to expand on my thoughts about the quest. so, here is a more extensive exploration of why I think the wyrmway quest is so important, and how I would personally improve the narrative, so as to give wyll a better resolution to his story.

wyll's whole quest has elements of fairy tales woven into it, and his character is an archetypal fairy tale prince. concluding his personal story by having him "slay the dragon" in the wyrmway is brilliant, as it follows the narrative of a typical fairy tale, and ties back to a dialogue of wyll's in act 1. after you've spoken to raphael for the first time, he tells you a tale his father once read to him, "the kind with a hero, a villain, and a moral." beyond this short story reflecting many different layers of wyll’s past, it also serves as a guideline for how wyll's quest plays out. but the wyrmway quest is necessary in order for it to play out properly, as it is there that the moral is fully revealed.

at the wyrmway, you learn that ansur, the "heart of the gate," is actually dead. well, undead. in meeting ansur, you learn the truth behind the emperor's identity and what led to ansur's death. and it is what led to ansur's death that reveals the moral of wyll's tale. it was ansur's rigid adherence to his lawful good moral alignment that ultimately destroyed him, and the relationship he had with balduran. and this was because he could not see his old friend as a person any longer, only a monster. ansur's refusal to compromise his values, rather than reconsider his perspective and hear his friend out, is clearly a parallel to ulder exiling wyll from baldur's gate, because he valued his duty to the city more than his own son. this is a truly ingenious way of criticising ulder's actions, and wonderfully ties the moral of wyll's story into the game's greater question of "what truly makes someone a monster?" moreover, all of this is necessary for a proper resolution to wyll's story, as it allows for ulder to show wyll that he's willing to break away from the mentality that lost ansur everything, so that he may properly reconcile with him.

by downplaying the importance of this quest, larian is not only weakening the aforementioned parallels between ansur & ulder and wyll & balduran, but also minimising the importance of ulder echoing balduran, when he says that wyll himself will be the city's saviour. he says this in response to the one instance in the ENTIRE game, that I can think of, where wyll openly admits to feeling defeated. some of wyll's dialogue post quest completion reveals that this is because he hoped that enlisting ansur's help and saving the city would have been his shot at "redeeming" himself to the city, and to his father. we know that wyll never needed to redeem himself, and that he's never done anything wrong. but despite any resentment he may express over being exiled, he never really blames his father for abandoning him, because his father is "good" and was merely "doing his duty." so when balduran tells wyll that he never needed ansur, that he is the heart of the gate, and then ulder echoes that sentiment to wyll when he returns from the wyrmway...ulder is finally showing wyll that he meant his apology and that wyll is was always good enough. it was ulder who wasn't good enough, much like it was ansur who was wrong for refusing to reconsider his morals. and this is then later reflected in the dialogue you can get with blade of avernus wyll in the epilogue, where he tells you how his father's changed his approach to governance and has become far more merciful.

now, if you're unfamiliar with wyll's quest, or perhaps with baldur's gate altogether, and are merely reading out of curiosity, you may go "wow, bumble! this sounds like a marvellously written story! I cannot possibly fathom how people are dissatisfied with this! or why larian would demote it to a sidequest!" I'd say your reaction is the result of not having the full picture. what you've read thus far merely outlines some core elements of wyll's story, and why they're important, without really discussing how successfully this narrative is executed in the game, or the way that larian & the fandom treat wyll. poorly, is the word I'd use in all three cases. the narrative is executed poorly, and he is treated poorly by both the devs and fans.

in respect to the narrative of his quest, I'll begin by saying that I believe that the idea behind the quest is great! the commitment to the fairy tale theme is incredible and works wonderfully for wyll's character. subverting our expectations of heroism and villainy through the tale of ansur and balduran is clever, and using that story to explore the relationship between ulder and wyll is, as I said before, brilliant. I truly enjoyed wyll's story as much as I enjoyed that of astarion, who most people on social media know has a very emotional and beautiful resolution to his quest. but I mention the beloved bloodsucker not for the purpose of praising his writing. I mention him, because I feel that his quest's overall narrative feels as satisfying as it does because he is given a lot of material all throughout the game. the same could be said of shadowheart, who has roughly the same amount of material as him. reaching the conclusion of their stories, despite any weak points in their writing, ultimately feels fulfilling for the player, because they've been through a lot with that character. but what of the true heart of the gate, our dearest prince wyll? well, out of the six origin companions, wyll has the least amount of material in his story. yes, the son of duke ulder ravengard, one of the most important npcs in the entire game, has the least amount of story material. astarion and shadowheart, conversely, possess no true tie to the central narrative of the game, but have the most material. now, rather than making an effort to rectify this atrocious disparity, larian chooses to relegate the conclusion of wyll's quest to a place of lesser significance, all while providing new material to less important characters instead, like gortash and halsin. gortash, who is not only bane's chosen, but also the villain at the heart of karlach's story. yet, the new material he was given implicates a more intimate relationship between him and the dark urge, and has nothing to do with karlach whatsoever. halsin, on the other hand, was originally meant to be nothing more than an npc, yet he now possesses five unique kisses, on top of several greetings for a romantic partner, which is something wyll still lacks entirely, even after six major patches and seventeen hotfixes.

And what of the wyrmway itself? I will say that the area is notably...underwhelming, for the lair of a legendary dragon, but the same could be said about the area every companion's quest concludes at. so I will not delve into how I feel that area could be structurally expanded. what I will talk about, is what I mentioned above- the narrative. I've seen a lot of hatred for the emperor's reveal, but I do not think that the reveal in itself is the problem. what is rather the problem is that the writing does not account for wyll being a companion, rather than an avatar. if he is your avatar, the reveal feels more impactful, because the narrative has followed wyll as the central figure of the game, rather than a customised character. thus, revealing the mysterious guardian figure as a hero of legend makes perfect sense, in the context of wyll's fairy tale themed quest. however, if wyll is not your avatar, the reveal falls flat. this is because he is no longer in the spotlight, and the game does nothing to account for that, which makes the entire quest feel like it is more about balduran than it is wyll. and this is done despite the fact that without wyll, there isn't even any point, narratively speaking, to having the emperor secretly be balduran. the emperor's function in the story is relevant specifically to wyll, and as I've explained, ansur and balduran's story is incredibly important to the resolution of wyll's own story. what needed to happen was sufficient material being added to the quest to ensure that wyll is still treated as the point of focus. not only that, but there should be material added at earlier points of the game, so as to strengthen the connection between wyll and the emperor, because prior to the wyrmway, the emperor only singles out whoever you're playing as, and there's nothing to account for that not being wyll. this lack of early game connection only serves to further weaken the impact this conclusion has. how would I improve wyll's story, to account for when he is a companion, so that he is treated as the focal point of the conclusion to his quest, and so that he is given a satisfying resolution to his story?

give wyll dialogue with and about the emperor that is exclusive to him, to draw a connection between them earlier on in the game. if gale can have an interaction with mystra that excludes your character entirely, as shadowheart does with dame aylin, then there's absolutely no reason why wyll cannot have an exclusive scene with the emperor.

rework the scene in which mizora gives wyll the ultimatum. while wyll is given agency to choose his own fate at the wyrmway, I feel that he should be given agency at this point as well. once again, there's no reason for why this can't be possible, as shadowheart is given the option to choose for herself both in act 2 and 3. then, by having the emperor pay special attention to wyll, the possibility for him to choose to save himself would become more realistic, as the emperor would have an understandable reason for trying to convince wyll to choose himself over his father. moreover, the emperor would possess the means to believably convince wyll to choose himself, because the emperor knows gortash personally and thus knows that gortash wouldn't just immediately dispose of someone as useful as ulder, which is something he could tell wyll. to account for the relationship between your player character and wyll, if wyll is told to choose for himself whether he should accept mizora's new pact, his choice to believe the emperor's claims could be determined by his approval of your avatar. if you've treated him well and reaffirmed his worth as a person, wyll could realise that the emperor has no reason to lie, and that alongside you, saving his father from gortash should be possible regardless of what mizora has promised. meaning: he would choose to break his pact. if you've treated him poorly, he could argue that he hates mizora, but he at least he knows he can rely on her power and lawful nature, whereas he has no reason to trust that you would actually help him save his father from both gortash and mizora, if he is indeed still alive. meaning: he accepts mizora's new terms.

introduce the possibility of multiple final outcomes for wyll's story a little earlier on in the game. if I'm not mistaken, it is only when you get to the wyrmway itself, and have defeated ansur, that the possibility of wyll even becoming duke is mentioned. I feel that the "blade of avernus," is an ending best left to be announced by wyll himself, after ansur's demise, but wyll becoming the new duke should be hinted at shortly after he's been given the ultimatum by mizora. how it is mentioned, and how likely wyll would be to follow that path, would obviously be dependant on whether he accepted mizora's ultimatum, but could also consider other factors, such as if ulder is alive.

if wyll is in your party, it should not be possible for the cutscene with ansur to be triggered by anyone else but wyll. if other companions act immediately in dialogue with npcs important to their quests (i.e. shadowheart attackign dame aylin, astarion attacking his siblings & cazador) if they are in your party, wyll should be given that same grace. he is given some, in act 2..... should you fail the perception check that allows you to negotiate wyll's original contract with mizora.....but I think anyone with any measure of intelligence can agree that that should not be locked between a random, unexplained dice roll which you have no control over.

going off the last point, the emperor's dialogue following ansur's final demise should perhaps be delivered in a short cutscene format. the dialogue with wyll, where he laments that ansur will not save them, and questions if this means baldur's gate will fall, can play out normally. but when the emperor tells wyll that he is the heart of the gate, there should be a moment in which the emperor shows wyll (and you as the player) visions of wyll surrounded by baldurians cheering after you've all defeated the brain. it could be a short scene, just a momentary vision, but it would clarify that the emperor is speaking directly to wyll. the vision paired with the emperor's words then makes wyll's following confidence feel a little less spontaneous, and gives his consideration of taking up ulder's ducal title a little more foundation.

after the emperor's identity is revealed, at some point after leaving the wyrmway, give the emperor a dialogue that explains that he was urged to protect wyll, in a way, because he related to wyll's experiences. it'd be important to ensure the emperor still sounds selfish, because he is, but to suggest that he feels some degree of connection to wyll. that way the writing would remain faithful to the emperor's character, but would also emphasise the connection between wyll and balduran (both heroes) as victims of those with inflexible lawful good morality (ulder and ansur/the moral), and those who exploit vulnerable people (mizora exploiting a young, selfless wyll by offering him the chance to save his city & gortash exploiting that balduran is a mindflayer and thus a monster in the eyes of society/ both villains). and for the "mindflayers don't have any feelings crowd" : experiencing such fondness for a person is not completely unrealistic for an illithid, as omeluum expresses feeling "warmth" towards your character if you save him from the submersible. the emperor is selfish, yes, but writing him with some degree of sympathy for a character that is paralleled to him in their quest makes him more interesting of a character, in my opinion.

add a post quest cutscene. shadowheart is given a cutscene after her quest is completed, regardless of whether your character has romanced her. the cutscene works well to show the player the complicated emotional state she is in, and allows her to express some of the anguish she's kept inside for so long. I believe this kind of cutscene would be perfect to fully conclude wyll’s quest, as he keeps a lot of his feelings to himself and deserves an opportunity to express them. if ulder is alive, the cutscene could feature the moment in which he echoes balduran's words and reaffirms that wyll never needed ansur to save the city. then, the scene can shift to your character helping wyll to prepare the dinner he mentioned wanting to make. in this scene, you can ask him about his feelings about everything that's happened. if ulder is not alive (something I've never personally had happen), the post quest cutscene could feature a moment in which the emperor reaffirms wyll as the true heart of the gate instead, and then transition to the dinner preparation. of course, wyll's responses would obviously be different depending on his approval of your character, whether he remains pacted to mizora, and whether his father is alive. either way, adding this cutscene would offer an opportunity for wyll to comment on how he personally feels about the conclusion to his quest. and by using cooking, which wyll seemed very excited about doing, there is the chance to include some dialogue about his time adventuring the sword coast.

those are just some of my ideas to make the wyrmway quest, in specific, stronger as an ending. if there are inconsistencies, I apologise, but his quest remains bugged, and I'm not entirely sure of the correct order certain dialogues are supposed to play out following ansur's death. I did my best to figure it out and you are welcome to correct any innaccuracies.

beyond the wyrmway, there is of course, much else that wyll deserves to have added to his companion quest & romance (some of which I briefly brushed upon). if you've read through all this, thank you for caring enough about wyll to do so, and I'd love to hear anything you might have to say about wyll's quest, wyrmway or otherwise. perhaps you may have better improvements in mind than I do!

please just keep comments respectful and focused on wyll. I will just block people who derail this post to speak about other companions for any purpose other than calling to attention the disparities between their quest material & wyll's.

also, if you're interested, here is the original post in which I talked about the wyrmway quest.

[all-about-kyu]

Hi~ can I request one from the second smut prompt list, number 69 with Nct dream Jaemin? A lot of smut but A little fluff can be added also if possible! A frenemies to lovers kind of.. hehe thank you beforehand

Pairing: Jaemin x fem!reader

Genre: smut, dash of fluff

Rating: R 18+ MINORS DNI MATURE CONTENT AHEAD

Warnings: parties, mentions of alcohol/ alcohol consumption Jaemin takes two sips of a drink but he’s not drunk, language

Smut Warnings: dry humping, hickeys, unprotected sex, mirror sex, dirty talk, body worshipping

Word Count: 3.5k

Note: here you go lovey!! I decided to theme it lightly around New Year’s since I just finished writing it and it’s late on New Year’s Eve here

Your dynamic with Jaemin has always been an odd one, when you were in a group with mutual friends you guys joked and talked as if you were best friends, but the moment you two were alone in the same space you were ready to fight each other for no reason at all. No one could explain your dynamic, not even yourself, no matter how hard they tried. Now was a prime example of this, you were both sitting at the table of Jeno’s apartment happily chatting with your friends at his New Year’s Eve party. You didn’t mean to sit next to him, you really didn’t want to in the first place but it just happened to play out that way. You had made the executive decision to not drink tonight, especially when you had an early shift at work the next morning.

Jaemin on the other hand was nursing the same drink he had been drinking all night. It was clear that the two of you were the only ones still in their right minds, at least of your friend group. Jeno had just run off with some girl, he probably won’t remember anything in the morning. Donghyuck was in the process of trying to seduce Renjun, who was clearly trying to get his best friend off of him. Mark on the other hand was trying his best to flirt with you through his tipsy state and you just laughed it off. You can practically feel Jaemin burning holes into your head, you aren’t sure why you were on the receiving end this time but you are far from surprised. You haven’t exactly been enjoying yourself all that much at the party, having Jaemin glaring at you while you tried to help Renjun escape a very drunk and flirty Donghyuck was not exactly ideal. Having Mark flirt with you only made matters slightly more uncomfortable, he was more of a brother to you than anything and having him flirt with you made things a bit awkward. Just to have some harmless fun though you decided to lay in on his flirting, never letting it get anywhere though.

“You’re really pretty y/n.” Mark slurs slightly.

“You’ve said that like ten times Mark, I do appreciate it though.” you giggle at him.

“Do you have a boyfriend?” he asks.

“No Mark,” you sigh, “we’ve been friends for years, if I had a boyfriend you would’ve known about him already.”

“Does that mean I have a chance?” he hopes.

“I don’t know about that, you won’t even remember this interaction in the morning.” you laugh at him.

Before he can utter another word someone sweeps by and grabs your wrist taking you with them. When you look up you see broad shoulders covered by a black leather jacket and bright orange hair. There was only one person you knew that had that hair, and those broad shoulders. Na Jaemin. He didn’t look back at you once, he just continued to take you where he wanted to. You tried to get him to talk to you and all you got in return was a scoff as he continued walking. You got about half way through the house when you had enough of his games. You pulled your wrist from his grip, that finally got his attention. He turned around and gave you a look that made you feel incredibly small under his gaze.

“What the fuck do you want Na?” you bite.

“I hated seeing you flirt with Mark, don’t you get it by now?” he bites back.

“You have no idea how insufferable you are Jaemin, I was having some harmless fun with Mark and you had to go and ruin my mood yet again. He won’t remember it in the morning and I know he wasn’t going to get anywhere with me. You’re just a pretentious asshole who feels the need to be in charge at all times.” you rant.

You reach your hand up to slap him away from you but he catches it and holds it against the wall behind you. Your eyes go wide with slight panic as he looks at you with dark eyes. Next thing you know his lips are on yours in an extremely heated kiss. You’re not sure what to do at first but then you melt into his touch and reach your free hand up into his hair pulling him closer. His hold on your arm loosens and you let it fly to the back of his head as well. His hands find purchase on your hips, holding you tightly to his body making sure you don’t move anywhere. Jaemin nips at your lower lip causing you to gasp and let his tongue invade your mouth making your kiss even more messy than it already was. One of his hands slides down your body ultimately gripping your thigh and pulling it up to rest against his hip. He squeezes the muscle every so often making you whine against his lips. You honestly couldn’t care less that you were making out in the middle of Jeno’s hallway, it wouldn’t be the first time someone did it and it certainly won’t be the last time either. Just as you go to move your hand down his arm you realize what you were doing. You bite down on his lip harder than you had this entire time causing him to wince and pull away.

“What the fuck y/n?!” he complains.

“You really thought making out with me would make me not be mad at you?” you scoff.

“Sweetheart,” he bites, “we both know we don’t actually hate each other. We just need to take care of this tension between us and it’ll all be fine.” he patronizes.

“You are not taking me to bed. Ever. That’s a promise Na Jaemin.” you seeth.

“Oh but, y/n, who said it had to be on the bed?” he smirks.

You try to stay angry at him but your facial expression speaks louder than your words. You may be saying you truly do hate him but your pupils are blown wide, and you’re nibbling on your lower lip. There was no denying you were attracted to him. Who wouldn’t be though, he was absolutely stunning, and when you weren’t at each other’s throats he was a genuinely funny and nice person. There was absolutely no point in denying your attraction when he was just so perfect. The internal debate you were having was completely useless, you know you want him, you just need to admit it.

“And where would you rather it be?” you flirt.

“Oh? Was it that easy that I just needed to ask?” he laughs cockily, “How about against the wall? Maybe the floor, in front of that lovely closet mirror I have.” his voice drops lower, “Wouldn’t that be a lovely time pretty?”

That was the final straw, you throw yourself forward and kiss him again. He makes a surprised noise but quickly reciprocates your advance. His hands return to their place on your hips picking up the kiss where you left off, aggressive and messy. Your hands tangle into his hair again further crushing your lips against each other. His hands travel south again and grab your ass causing you to whimper. This time you let your hands wander and wrap around his waist effectively pressing his hardening length against your core. He lifts you up and holds you against the wall as he began to grind his hips into yours. You let out little whimpers and moans at the friction you so desperately needed. You still didn’t have the mind to care about doing such acts in the hallway, that is until you hear someone wolf whistle at you both effectively breaking you both from your daze of lust.

“Thanks Taro,” Jaemin chuckles when you attach your lips to his throat, “it’s not like we're busy or anything.” the other simply winks and walks away leaving you two alone again, “Pretty, we should go to my room at least, I don’t think Jeno would appreciate me fucking you right here in our hallway.” he teases.

You whine and start leaving marks on his skin wherever you kiss. He chuckles at you and grabs your chin to get your attention on his words. If you thought you looked a mess before, now you were worse. Your eyes completely clouded with lust, your lips bright red bruised from kissing, your hair completely a mess and frizzed. He smirks at you before repeating his statement. You nod at him and break away from his hold on your chin diving back to leave marks on his neck. His large hands hold your ass as he carries you down the hall further to room. The moment he has the door closed he has you pinned against the door, this time he attacks your neck leaving matching hickeys across the blank canvas of your skin.

“Jaemin,” you whine, “aren’t you going to fuck me?”

“That desperate already? Do you want me to fuck you against the door? Let everyone know exactly what I’m doing to you. Or would you want me to fuck you in front of that mirror over there, watch how good I fuck you. See what you’ve been missing out on.” he groans as he grinds against you again.

“T-the mirror.” you whine.

He carefully places you on your feet again before guiding you to sit in front of the mirror between his legs. His hands push your hair off your shoulder before letting his hands ghost over your body. He places soft kisses onto your exposed neck and whispers dirty words into your ear once in a while. You whine when his hands stay in one place for a moment longer than he had in other places. His hands end up staying over your breasts cupping them as he continues kissing your neck.

“Look at you baby,” he rasps, “you look so pretty in my lap. Maybe you should be here more often.” you whimper at his comment, “Should I take these clothes off of you angel?”

“Please, Jaem I need it.” you practically moan.

He smirks at you before gently lifting the edge of your shirt up, he takes his time taking it off of you taking every chance he gets to tell you something completely filthy or praise you. By the time you top half was undressed you know your underwear is completely drenched with want for him. He lets his hands graze over the bare skin now, you let out small noises as his fingers make contact with your nipples. His hand eventually finds the waistband of your jeans and flick the button open. You’re practically squirming at this point trying to get any attention you can from him.

“Jaemin, please, I can’t take it anymore. Do something, anything, just want to feel you.” you beg when he takes too long to get the rest of your clothes off.

“Oh? You don’t want me to take my time?” he fakes surprise, “Very well pretty, I can move faster for you.”

His touches become completely different now, he’s rougher with you, he practically rips the rest of your clothes off and forces your thighs apart. He hums as he assesses and sees how you look impossibly more desperate. You turn your head and lean it back against his shoulder. He looks down at you and makes eye contact, his eyes are dark and hard contrasting your begging desperate ones. You reach down and tug at his sleeve, you watch a smirk grow on his lips knowing exactly what you wanted.

“Do you want me to undress too, pretty?” he asks condescendingly, “I’ll take off my jacket and shirt but that’s all for now.” he tells you.

He leans your forward slightly as he shrugged his jacket off and lifted his plain white t-shirt over his head. You focus on his body through the mirror seeing how his arm muscles flexed as he moved his shirt, the moment you got a glimpse of his muscular torso you can practically feel yourself getting wetter. His arm wraps across your front pulling you back against his bare chest. Having skin to skin contact only made you more desperate, his other hand begins running up and down on your thigh making you squirm under his grasp. He moves his hand to rest on the inner part of your thigh pressing it down to fully expose you to him. His fingers slide to graze over your soaked core making you moan finally getting contact where you wanted it.

“My, my, pretty,” he muses, “look how fucking soaked you are. And all for me.”

“Just for you Jaem, please just do something.” you nearly cry out.

He lets his fingers run through your folds, not giving you as much as you really want. He toys with your clit before moving to run his fingers up and down the wet skin again. You buck your hips up into his hand as a silent plea to get more contact. He smirks against your hair and finally plunges two fingers into you. You let out a loud moan, finally feeling him inside you somehow. He doesn’t let you adjust to his ministrations, he sets a fast pace drilling his fingers into you. His other hand busies itself tugging and rolling your nipple only making you feel even more needy. You let out moans shamelessly the more he continues, you can’t have a single cohesive thought with how he’s treating you. The only thing on your mind was Jaemin Jaemin Jaemin.

“Pretty,” he breathes against your shoulder, “look at that,” he muses, “look how fucking wet you are for me, taking my fingers so good. I can’t wait to see how you look on my cock.”

“Please, let me.” you moan, reaching behind you to palm him through his pants.

He grabs your wrist for the third time tonight and pushes you forward so your chest is against the carpet. He takes both his hands and grabs you ass, you try to stop yourself from making any more noises. He pushes his fingers back into you, setting the same brutal pace he had before. You look up slightly into the mirror and see him behind you shuffling, all you can do is hope he’s taking off the rest of his clothes as he makes you fall apart on his fingers. You reach back and press your own fingers against your clit rubbing it in small circles matching the pace that Jaemin set with his own. Your high was so close and you could practically taste it. That’s when he pulls his fingers out of you. He laughs when you whine at him.

“Come here pretty, sit on my cock like a good girl.” he smirks at you as he makes eye contact with you through the mirror.

You couldn’t trust your voice to be stable enough to respond. You lean your body back and quickly hover your body over his waiting member. He presses small kisses into your shoulder before guiding you down onto him. You let out a broken whimper when he was fully inside you. Looking at the sight in the mirror you look like an absolute wreck, your makeup was smeared across your face and your neck was completely covered in marks thanks to the man behind you. You give an experimental bounce on him making you both moan at the feeling, you knew you wouldn’t be able to support yourself for very long though. You lean your body back against his chest and he takes your waist in his hands helping you bounce on him. He groans as he sets a rather quick pace. You clench around him as more moans fly from your lips. One of his hands snake down to find your clit again rubbing it as you continue your motions. He looks at the mirror seeing how absolutely wrecked you look.

“Fuck, look at that pretty. You’re taking my cock so well, knew you were made for me.” he breathes out.

“Jaem, I want more.” you moan, “Please.”

He moves his hand off your waist and turns your head towards his face. He captures your lips in a sloppy kiss. Your hair fell in both your faces as you kissed but you couldn’t care less, he was making you feel better than anyone else ever has and you did not care how much of a mess you looked. Your high began to build up again, your belly filling with a heat that could only be satisfied by him. His thrusts became uneven and more aggressive as his high approached as well. Your lips never separate from each other, you gasp and moan against each other but never pull away for more than a half second. Opening your eyes for a moment, you glance at the mirror and the sight you see has to be the most arousing thing you’ve ever seen. The way Jaemin drills into you, you swear you see stars. You had no idea why you pretended to hate him for so long when this chemistry was laying right below the surface.

“Jaem, I’m gonna cum.” you whine out, against his lips “God, you make me feel so fucking good.” you moan again.

“Go on pretty, make a mess on my cock. You have no idea how beautiful you look on me.”

You let your orgasm explode from you leaving you shaking in Jaemin’s lap. Your mouth hangs open in a silent moan as he continues his thrusts helping you ride out your orgasm. You grab onto his hair with one hand while the other grips his arm trying to keep your sanity. He lets out quiet raspy moans as your walls flutter around him. His high came right after yours, he pulled out and released ropes of cum across your belly. He bit down on your shoulder leaving another mark behind trying to keep himself from moaning too loud. You both stay there for a moment catching your breath after the intensity that was your orgasms. He reached over at one point grabbing a random t-shirt to wipe the cum from your belly. You protested saying you really needed a shower.

“Pretty, do you really expect the bathroom to be open during a party? Someone’s probably in there getting their dick wet right now.” he chuckles lightly, “Sleep over, we can shower in the morning.”

You turn around in his lap and hug him, you bury your face in his shoulder. He smiles and wraps his arms around your middle hugging you back. Your breathing began to even out as he held you, he knew you were going to be falling asleep soon. Lifting you up he placed you on his bed before heading to his closet. You watch him quietly and happily as he throws a pair of grey sweats on (which you were very happy about) and turns to you again holding a larger t-shirt. Soon enough he was standing in front of you and helping you put the shirt on. As he does so you hear people counting down the last ten seconds of the year. The moment you hear the people in his living room shout ‘happy new year’ you gently push yourself forward and kiss him softly.

“Happy New Year Jaemin.” you smile sleepily.

“Happy New Year pretty.” he smiles back, “I’m happy I can go into the new year having you as my girlfriend rather than whatever stupid fake hatred we had before.”

“And I’m happy to have you as my boyfriend.” you yawn.

“Sleep, pretty, we can talk more in the morning.” he tells you, getting you both comfy in his bed.

Little Bonus Scene:

“Jaemin,” you hear someone whining, effectively waking you up.

You don’t dare move though, you stay in the comforting warmth of your boyfriend’s arms. Jaemin is still passed out as he holds you, he is completely unaware of someone calling him. You begin to fall back to sleep when you hear the person whine for Jaemin again. Not even a moment later his bedroom door swings open and loudly hits against his wall. You hear Jaemin groan and wrap his arms around you tighter.

“Jaemin!” you finally register it’s Jeno, “Oh fuck, never mind I can make my own hangover soup.” he quickly starts to back out, “Good job though, it’s about time you two sorted out those emotions.”

“Just get the fuck out Jeno.” Jaemin groans, throwing a pillow at him in the process.

You laugh and stretch up a bit to kiss him, “Good morning you.”

“Good morning, pretty. We’re staying in bed for a while still though. I’m not letting you go anywhere.”

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[kunikiiida-kuuun]

In his own Little Ways (Kunikida x GN Reader)

Summary: You just know he loves you, in his own little ways.

Word Count: 1.2k

Genre: Pure Fluff.

Everything Kunikida Doppo says or does is meticulously planned. Whether it's solving the case of a missing salaryman or doing laundry, every step is well thought out and carefully executed. Such precision is followed in each and every aspect of his life, including the love department.

Dating Kunikida was nice, if not a unique experience altogether; a pre-planned and thoroughly discussed time, date and location along with a detailed map of the agenda of the day emailed to you on a week's notice. It almost felt like a case report or the minutes of a meeting on most occasions. But you were certainly able to accommodate his peculiar attention to detail after partners who were always arbitrarily thirty minutes late and didn't even bother to inform you when they had to cancel on you.

He's the perfect lover seen across every piece of fiction, a dreamy Shoujo manga lead on most occasions. Sure, he was a little rough around the edges, eccentric in his own ways, but the man definitely knew how to be a gentleman.

There he was at your doorstep, on the day of the date, in his perfectly ironed clothes, carefully picked out the night before (after taking into account the weather and temperature of the next day and advising you on the same), neither a second early nor late, holding freshly picked flowers for you. He opens doors, and pulls out chairs for you, makes sure to match your pace, an ever so chivalrous gentleman, no doubt an exclusive section in his Ideal.

But in moments other than your infrequent weekly dates (because of the man's diehard dedication to his work), it took you some effort to remember that he was in fact, your boyfriend.

Initially it was about your missed deadlines and reports full of errors at work, (seemingly) improper protocol while dealing with a client and how you were just garbage at filing. And once you moved in together (purely because it was smart choice in terms of financial savings, thank you very much.) he chewed your head off about your terrible sleeping habits, your low regard towards systematic arrangement of things, your debatable expenditures, how you mixed the whites and blacks and put his socks in the drier. And when he's nagging you about your eating habits the fifth time that day, it seems like he acts like more like your parent than your significant other.

It didn't help that he was verbally constipated, stoic and reserved, emotions always under control (except when it's dealing with a certain bandaged man, ranging from pure rage to utter disdain.) Everyone can't help but wonder if those are the only two emotions the blonde knows.

But you know otherwise; that he was so much more than what he let on. It took you a while to understand too, a little bit of dancing around to really see through his uptight demeanor and realize that he expressed himself in his actions rather than verbally; his affection, while certainly there, to be read between the lines.

Like when he had sat beside you, long after the closing hours, helping you complete your reports, after which he insisted to walk you to the station. (He missed a big discount sale on meat and eggs.) How the man didn't know how that had truly been the beginning of the inevitable blooming feelings you had towards him (and his towards you.)

You pretend to not notice the fond and soft look in his eyes when your brows are furrowed in concentration as you worked through your mistakes and redid the reports.

He knows your favorite food and choice of beverage, each detail committed to memory. While you are busy chattering to him about an adorable stray cat you saw on your way to work, your usual order is right in front of you, even though you don't recall placing an order or even mentioning it to him.

Although he's grumbling, he relents easily, when you drag him down to the local shrine's summer festival. He knows with a single glance at your face which plush toy catches your eye at the shooting game booth, and pretends that you're being silly when you cheer loudly for him, and flatter him over his oh so ordinary shooting skills, but when he's handing you the prize (the exact plushie you had wanted) and quickly turning away to the next booth, you catch the small smile on his face and redness of his ears.

Kunikida keeps things strictly professional at the agency, and you can feel him freeze up whenever you brush your hand against his, but over time you know he's warming up to you, leaning towards your touch, even going as far to take your hand in his and press a chaste kiss to your palm. (Until he’s inevitably caught by Dazai, leaving you both as a flustered mess.)

You know he's opening up to you when he actually sets his Ideal down, relying on something other than his handy notebook. He vents and talks to you about his concerns and thoughts, eager to hear a new perspective from you. And on particularly difficult days when the weight of his ideals bears down heavily over him, after a strenuous mission, he's finally lowering his walls, and letting you hold him. He's opening his heart to you slowly and steadily, and letting you in.

You can't help but smile when you see him take your advice; to stop whatever he was doing every few hours, to close his eyes and take a deep breathe, when work felt overwhelming.

He scolds you all the time for oversleeping, and even when he's standing beside the bed, announcing you to wake up in his usual stern tone, the undeterred sleepy smile you send his way, with a "Five more minutes" has him sighing in defeat as he tucks you in gently. (You could feel the ghost of a kiss on your forehead, but perhaps you're just imagining it).

When you're coughing too persistently at work that day, he wordlessly presents a steaming cup of ginger honey tea before you, along with a pack of yoghurt (a plain unsweetened one as well as a flavored, one that was your favorite, you noted.) and cough drops. He makes sure to sternly advice (borderline lecture) you to keep away from frozen foods, to not eat ice-cream all the time, to dress warmly and salt water gargle every night and you know he's just being his caring self at this point.

There's a mysterious parcel lying on your desk but just from the concise and stiff writing, you can tell it's from Kunikida. It's a cute little keychain of a cat mascot, a souvenir from his short trip outside Yokohama. "It reminded me of you." says the back of the little note. When you look up, he's watching you intently from his desk, and quickly swinging his chair away. Still glancing at you from the corner of his eye, you mouth thank you and you can see how his eyes light up even from the distance as he nods curtly, returning back to his work.

He does it time and again, seemingly effortlessly, setting aflight butterflies in your stomach and a warm feeling in your chest, in a way you've never experienced before. It's the way you reach out and he finds you mid-way, and in the constant trying that makes you more certain than ever.

It's when finally at the end of the day, he changes into his set of coordinated striped pajamas, lets his hair down, takes off his glasses and willingly surrenders into your arms. If you yourself aren't too sleepy, maybe, just maybe, you will hear a tiny whisper, muffled with the way his head is buried in your hair.

You just know he loves you, in his own little strange ways.

[theodora3022]

Claim (Yandere Chuuya Nakahara)

Pairing: Yandere! Chuuya Nakahara X Fem reader

Summary: You have the courage to mock Dazai when he flirts with you casually, different from almost every other woman Dazai throws himself on. Seeing his nemesis being stepped on brings Chuuya great joy, which escalates to him taking a special interest in you.

Notes: So...If you read my BNHA fics you should know I have a thing for wind superpowers, so reader is going to have a wind ability in here as well. Be gone if you have problems with that. My first take on BSD, on Chuuya nevertheless... Hopefully this does not flop. I thought about writing Kunikida for this one, but I just could not get Chuuya’s smirk off my mind (Along with Fyodor’s but that is for another day) Also this is self indulgent as hell, so be warned. I’m not satifised with the final result, as some parts feels a bit forced...But there you have it. 

Word count: 2.8k 

Warnings: Drugging, coercion, mention of knife and blood, implied non con  at the end

You were sitting beside a floor window of a café when Chuuya first saw you, when he was on his way to get some beer. At first, it was not you that drawn his attention, it was that guy on the opposite end of the coffee table.

Osamu Dazai. Also known as the bane of Chuuya Nakahara’s existence and his greatest adversary. Out womanizing again, he never changes. He was about to ignore those shady behaviours and just carry on, until he hears how you are attacking Dazai with your words.

“Dazai, please. I bet you said that to every woman you met.” Slowly stirring your hot beverage, you smirk as you took a little sip. “It is a miracle how you got this far unscathed.” You seem to see right through Dazai, how clever. Now Chuuya have to hear how this can go down. His own drink can wait, this little comedy show is more worthwhile.

“But beautiful! Your eyes shine like the brightest stars, I just cannot let that go unappreciated.” “If you are so found of shining things, I can get you a pack of glitter to stare at. I would actually appreciate it if you stop staring right into my eyes, thank you.” This is a mistake, you thought. You thought Dazai was just being a good Senpai when he invites you to join him for a quick coffee at lunch. And of course being the naïve new recruit, you said yes without hesitation.

A pack of glitter? Oh dear. Out of all those years Chuuya has known Dazai, he had never seen the brunette getting such a good roast. Placing a hand over his mouth to muffle his chuckles, Chuuya is beyond amused. Most women would be too busy swooning over that pretty face, but you did not even flinch and insulted him just like that. You got some sass!  That is the first time the mafia executive had taken a formal notice of you. You are indeed a fair woman, no wonder Dazai would choose to hit on you.

He does vaguely recall recently hearing about the ADA obtaining a new recruit. A young woman with a wind ability. But you are far more interesting then that. “This has been pleasant, but I think it is time to head back to the office.” When Kunikida told you Dazai can be a handful yesterday, you did not expect this is how you would find out. You stopped him from taking out his wallet, shaking your head: “Dazai. I will pay for myself. Besides, you are in enough debt as you are now. See you back at the agency.”

Not even Chuuya can make Dazai appear this defeated, this discouraged. Just who are you exactly? Forget the beer, Chuuya needs to know all about you at once. 

Reading through your file back at the headquarters, your info is enough to make even Chuuya raise his eyebrows a couple of times.

You can command any gas to your will? That is a rare gift, even the Port Mafia had yet to secure that. Too bad you are on the wrong side, Chuuya can just think of so many ways of using your ability to its full potential. The file was put back to the storage, sure. But you had impressed him back at that café and peaked his interests. It would be hard to make him unsee Dazai being humiliated. But you did not linger on his mind much after. 

However, that would not be lasting too long. Chuuya was shocked to hear some of the members has died in dark alleys of yokohoma, apparently from lack of oxygen, but without any traces of choking or even a cut. Mori even called him to the office to discuss about this.

Pictures of you, in causal and business attire lay across the expensive office desk. You were smiling in all of them, although that smile does not look like an amused one to Chuuya now.

“Do you recognize this woman?”

How can Chuuya forget about you? The woman who gave him the best comedy show, who stomped on Dazai’s philanderer ways so mercilessly. “A new recruit of ADA. Her air control abilities must have enabled her to suck the oxygen particles out of human bodies. It also gives her the ability to levitate and an incredible speed, which is such a headache. Even Akutagawa cannot seem to finish her.”

What a little troublemaker you are. Consider Chuuya motivated. He knows you are strong, but not anyone can escape from Akutagawa. Where is the fun without a little challenge?

“I will go. My abilities would allow me to get the job done.” Heck, this once he would get something Dazai cannot have! In this mini game, at least, Chuuya would be the winner. 

“Chuuya, you seem awfully enthusiastic about this. May I ask why that is?” Stroking Elise’s hair, Mori carefully observe the young man’s expressions. “She has the guts to insult Dazai, should be a fun one. I do not plan to kill her, however. That would be such a waste.”

“Yes, that would be most ideal. Her ability would be a valueble asset, here’s some drugs if she is being too difficult.”

Oh but you are so much more then the wielder of a powerful ability to Chuuya.

------------------------------------

Work has been a pain in the ass lately, so on your afternoon off, you choose to take a walk along the water in the park. Everything looks so peaceful, children running amok, couples holding hands, the sound of the birds chirping, all sounds so natural and calming. You let out a sigh of relief as you settled on a bench beside a tree and closed your eyes, breathing in the forest scent, still sleep deprived from the nightmares.

Although you only killed those gangsters to defend a civilian, you regret it somewhat afterwards. You expected revenge, but not from someone like Akutagawa? You can only remove the target’s oxygen from their bodies when you are standing still and concentrated, never while fleeing for your life. If it is not for your unparalleled speed, you were sure one of those dark spikes is going to be your ultimate demise. It was too close for your liking. Before you were always able to leave safely with your ability, but this time you barely made it.

Dozing off in a park while the Port Mafia is on your trail? Chuuya would advise against that. 

However, he would say he much prefer this compliant, soft look on your face compare your sarcastic, confident grin towards Dazai. Dark circles under your eyes? Have you been having sleeping problems? Looks like the little hero is not as brave as she lets on.

Now, he needs to be careful. Even though you look as harmless as a little bunny now, Chuuya can still recall the last expressions his deceased subordinates made. Dying from oxygen loss surely does not look pleasant. While the file said you can only use that special method once per week, Chuuya cannot leave any room for errors. 

Ah, it seems you had carelessly dropped your handkerchief on the ground. You did not seem to notice. As if you want him to come near. Who is he to decline a lady’s invitations?

Sensing his approach, you jumped out the bench and distanced yourself from Chuuya. Always on your guard, this should be interesting. Instead of kept closing in the distance, Chuuya bend down and picked up your handkerchief. “Did you drop this?”

See, you were overreacting! He is only trying to tell you that you dropped something. Feeling the guilt of mistaking him for an assassin churns in your stomach, you put up an apologetic smile: “My apologies, sir.  And thank you very much.” Yet you cannot shake off the feeling of you saw him before. Is he a government official? Or perhaps a store clerk? It would be rude if you actually do know him. Yes, you definitely seen his handsome face somewhere. Reaching out to his outstretched hand, you tried to retrieve your handkerchief. But as you take the little square cloth into your hand, his slim but firm fingers snapped around your wrist like handcuffs, seizing you with a smug smirk on his face. “Let go of me, Sir. You wouldn’t want me to use my ability on you.” 

Your gaze turned cold as the winter snow, as if you are willing to punch him in the face then and there. 

A good chance to observe your ability in action. How can Chuuya miss this opportunity? You tried to wiggle out of his grasp while activating your winds, but to your horror, it does not seem to have any effect on Chuuya. Sure, his hat and hair are flowing because of the strong wind, but he has not moved a single inch, still clenching your left wrist in his hand, lips still curling upwards. Turning to your second solution: bringing rocks to hit him until unconsciousness. Why wouldn’t the rocks move? Just who is this man? “Are you with the Port Mafia?”

That took you long enough. Chuuya let out a sinister chuckle, pulls you into his embrace with ease. Locking his right arm around your waist, he whispers beside your ear: “Of course, cutie. And you just walked straight into my trap. Now, it is best if you do not move, I would hate for this knife to leave a scar on your fragile little neck.” Feeling a thin, cold blade pressed against your throat, threatening to cut into your skin, you nervously gulped. Who is he exactly? You should have memorized the faces of the big names of the mafia-

Your ability is impressive. Even Chuuya has to admit that much. If it were not for the reinforced gravity he applied on himself, he would be on the other side of the park by now. Such a shame you are working for that little agency. Crap. You finally remember. Cursing sleep depravation under your breath, you recall where you had seen his face: the files back in the agency. One of the executives, Chuuya Nakahara, with the powers of manipulating gravity. That is why your winds cannot push him away. Just how did you end up with an executive’s knife pressing against your throat? 

Under ideal circumstances, you would order the oxygen particles to stay away from this man, but that ability could only be used once per week. You have not recharged enough, and the fact that you are not in best condition does not help either. 

“Now, you got two options, sweet. First, you can try to get away, and it would not end pretty.” Chuuya laughs he feels you shiver, clearly frightened by the idea of your blood spilling out like a fountain once he slices open your throat. Your resistance has pathetic impacts on him, but you have to at least try. You have been neglecting your physical training because you often rely on that extraordinary speed your ability grants you. However, that also means you are helpless in close up situations such as present. Not so confident now, aren’t you? “Second, pay a visit to our headquarters. The boss would like an audience with you.” You certainly do not want to fall into the hands of the port mafia. However, there are civilians in the park. They did not seem to notice how Chuuya is holding you at knifepoint.  Letting yourself, an ADA agent die here would mean the agency’s reputation is done for. Getting yourself killed in broad daylight, in a public place no less! How incompetent. Looks like the only option is to go with him, for now. “Fine. I will go with you.” “Smart choice. But I would expect no less from an intelligent woman like you.” He carefully removed the knife, and just when you were about to relax and think of a retaliate method, you felt a sharp pain on your left arm. A syringe. Just what did he injected you? Watching you fall onto the ground by your knees, barely able to lift a finger due to the sedation drugs, brings him a strange sense of contentment. Chuuya does not consider himself as a sadist by any means, but after seeing how you treated Dazai, shining with confidence and smugness, only made this submissive version of you so much more satisfactory. “Do not look at me like that, dear (y/n). Just a little insurance that you would not leave without permission. I hope you understand.” You do not, but that does not concern him. Swooping you up effortlessly, Chuuya carries your weak body out of the park, straight to a van that awaits there for a long time.

You never imagined, not even in your wildest dreams, that you would be in the Port Mafia’s headquarters like this. Being carried through corridor after corridor ,by one of their executives like a doll, although not by your own free will. Guards everywhere, almost at every turn point. Maybe you can break one of the windows and fly out? Alas, that would not possible if all you can generate is little breezes due to your present condition. 

“Do not worry, (y/n).” Feeling your body tense up, Chuuya choose to reassure you, or at least try to. “If simple murder was my objective, you would be dead in that park.” 

There are worse things then death. You really did mess up this time. You do not even want to imagine what they could do to you. 

“Enter.”

Placing you gently on the carpted floor, like a fragile china artifact, Chuuya bowed to the man behind the desk. “I brought (y/n) here, as you requested.” A cloved finger lifts your chin up, forcing you too look up into his eyes. You did not flinch, instead you stared back with unveil anger burning in your (e/c) eyes. 

“Quite a feisty one. Would you like to join us? Your wind ability completely outclasses my other assassins. That speed and that special method! Truly impressive. You should not waste your talents in that agency. The Port Mafia could offer you more.”

Using the little strength you had left, you got away from the mafia’s boss’s reach and shook your head: “I would rather die a gruesome death then working for you. If you want to kill me, you can do it now.” 

“Then, I suppose we need to change our method of negotiation-” Great, you can already feel those cold torture instruments.

“I can handle it.” To your surprise, Chuuya stopped the man from saying any more. 

The older man looks to his subordinate with curious eyes. “Chuuya? Are you sure? Wouldn’t it be better to leave this to our experts?” 

“Leave it to me, boss. She would be compliant within a week, I can guarantee.” Why would he want to trouble himself with this? Well, he merely wants to claim what Dazai cannot, as simple as that. 

“As you wish, then. As long as you do not break her beyond repair, she is all yours.”

You want to shout, to scream that you are not some object to be hand over, but you just do not have the energy to do so. There is not much you can do beside being a silent observer on the ground. 

Instead of a torture chamber, Chuuya took you to his personal quarters in the Mafia base. Perhaps he wants to do this the tender way? Sway you with high salary or numerous other perks of working in this mafia? 

It is when he thrown you on the bed, straddling over your helpless form, tearing your clothes off mercilessly, you realize how wrong you were.

“You look so good under me, where you belong.” He did not even bother to unbutton your blouse, just ripped the fine fabric off swiftly, grinning at your horrified expressions. “Come on, do not look so scared. This is not like you. Where is your fierce spirts when you insult Dazai?” Has he been stalking you? How could he-

“Ah, no matter. That jerk tried to win you over, but it is me who would get you.You would forget all about him when you are busy screaming my name later. Do you think you can handle my torture methods, dear (y/n)? Gods, you are beautiful. No wonder why Dazai would be head over heels for you.” 

How you bit your lip to supress your tears, trying to cover your chest for some modesty, only made his lust increase drastically. This time, Chuuya can finally be proud of his accomplishment: claiming a prize Dazai can never possibly won.

[maleyanderecafe]

Yanderes Killing their S/O

Hello again to another one of these analysis posts! I've been thinking lately about yandere tropes and one of the biggest ones that came up in my mind was the idea of yanderes killing their s/os. A lot of people in asks have often stated that this idea is rather cliche or not executed properly, so let's get into why that might be.

First, before examining this, let's talk a bit about the origins of yanderes. I've probably mentioned this a bit before either in other asks or other analysis, but the idea of yandere comes from the deconstruction of the trope Yamato Nadeshiko. Obviously, there are other cases of yanderes outside Japan, but we'll talk specifically about the Japanese history of it. Yamato Nadeshiko is the idea of idealized Japanese women. A person who is a Yamato Nadeshiko is often very obedient, graceful, and has maturity and humility while still being able to rule with a forceful push without being overly emotional. This is the idealized version of Japanese women, at least in the Neo-Confucious era. However, the deconstruction part of this comes when the character in question doesn't have this kind of inner force, basically becoming a doormat. When a character is overly graceful and still gets stepped on like a doormat, they are likely to snap and become violent, something that is shown a lot when it comes to yanderes. This is where the deconstruction comes in. If the character is forced to love such a perfect life but is still stepped on over and over again, at some point, this person will snap and destroy everything in their path. This idea still persists a bit in yanderes as often yanderes are characters who outwardly seem very graceful and perfect, while inwardly they are more obsessive. There is a really good read on it here that goes more in-depth with the origins of yanderes and the psyche of Yuna.

Like I've said before, we can still see how the idea of Yamato Nadeshiko still persists in yanderes, at least in broad terms. A lot of yanderes, in both male and female forms, are often depicted as kind, graceful and smart, at least initially. For instance, in terms of a school setting, this kind of character is not only nice to everyone but has the best grades, a huge army of fans behind them, and good teachers. Outwardly, they're likely to be depicted as perfect or a kind person, but inwardly, it's likely that they're a lot more twisted and obsessed. It's not necessarily just in a school setting either, a lot of yanderes are depicted as kind and perfect people when in reality they are a lot more dangerous than they might appear. With this thought, this perfection is shattered when they fall in love, becoming attached and obsessed with their lover, to the point of them being unstable and unable to live without them. If something goes wrong with them and the s/o, for instance, the s/o cheats on them, then they snap, often causing the death of the s/o in the process. This part is where we see the Yamato Nadeshiko snaps from the pressure, and in this case, the yandere snaps causing the death of the s/o.

So why do many people find that a yandere killing their s/o unacceptable or uninteresting? The idea of a yandere killing their s/o is nothing new. In fact, it often makes a lot of sense that a yandere might kill their s/o, especially if the s/o has done something wrong, and the yandere themselves are not stable. Well, there are a couple of reasons why this trope is unacceptable or uninteresting to a lot of people.

For one, this trope of a yandere killing their s/o is expected and often becomes cliche. Yanderes killing their s/o has been pretty synonymous with the archetype itself, next to knives and the yandere face. If the s/o cheats on the yandere, of course, the yandere is going to get mad and kill the s/o. If the yandere misunderstands what the s/o is doing, of course, they might feel that death is the only option for them. Just looking at most yanderes, we often expect them to kill their loved one, but the idea is just very cliche. Now, mind you, there's nothing wrong with writing a yandere that kills their s/o, it's how you execute it. Often a lot of people write the yandere killing their s/o in the same way- the yandere misinterprets/interprets the s/o doing something that jeopardizes their relationship or they find that something is trying to stop their relationship and become a killer to stop it. Cheating is pretty common and so is talking to competition, with the yandere misinterpreting the action. The problem with this is that it's often written in a way that just makes it seem like the yandere is being paranoid without really anything to back it up. We expect that this action will cause conflict with the s/o and a lot of times we expect what they saw to be a misunderstanding or something that's not worth killing over. This itself has been done over and over again, so much so that again, many people expect it.

The second reason is that often, the yandere is not written well, and therefore the death of the s/o is more for shock factor if anything. When the yandere kills their s/o, yes, we might understand why he does it in terms of reason, but we don't really sympathize or care about it because we don't actually know why the yandere thinks that way. This may have worked when the concept of a yandere was still being formed, but nowadays, it's important that your characters have some sort of depth to them. This isn't just the case with specifically yanderes either, many things that used to be simple concepts (anime, cartoons, comics, even films) often now have more characterization of characters in terms of things like backstories, personalities, and actions outside of their stories. I really do like this trend and it makes me happy that people are putting more depth into what each character is like and why they are like that. But a lot of the time, especially for smaller one-shots, we don't really see much of why a yandere might decide to kill their s/o. We might be able to infer or take a guess, but it doesn't seem like it would really give enough information or even enough emotion to empathize. I'm not saying that it's impossible to write a developed character in a one-shot, it's just there is less space to do so. In one-shots, its also very easy to simply kill the s/o at the end because the story won't continue on from there.

Finally, the last reason is that when the yandere does kill the s/o, we often don't really feel for the s/o's death because the s/o isn't really established as a character. This is also something that can happen with yanderes as well since the yanderes often don't have much characterization, but I feel like this is especially true for the s/o. A lot of times, the s/o has such basic characterization that there's really nothing to describe them other than being "nice" or "kind". this is especially true in otome games where the MC is suppose to be the stand in for the character, but actually acts rather irrationally or in a stupid way to get specific character endings or bad endings. Even in stories, I often find the yandere far more interesting then their love interest, mostly because the love interest doesn't have any interesting or insightful qualities or flaws. In fact, it almost seems as if the s/o is meant to be killed because of how uninteresting they are, which is unfortunate as it means that they weren't very well written. We can also see this in terms of the yandere itself as often we don't even get to see what their reaction is to murdering their s/o and what effect they may have on them emotionally or physically in the long run. Do they mourn for the loss of the s/o? Do people find out about who killed the s/o? Does the yandere even realize they've killed the s/o? There's a lot of different questions that often aren't explored when it comes to what happens.

There are probably a lot of reasons why people don't like the yandere troupe of killing their s/o and there's good reason to be. But that doesn't mean that you can't write a yandere that kills their s/o in a story. But you should consider a few things while thinking about writing it, to better write a good character.

First of all, consider how the yandere leads up to killing the s/o as well as the reason for killing the s/o. In a lot of cases, it's because of jealousy that is often mistaken (they think the s/o is cheating on them when in reality they're just asking about something else. This kind of miscommunication is common and honestly really annoying in all aspects, since it could be easily solved through. There are a lot of reasons to why the yandere may kill the s/o, and what might lead up to it. It might be a unfortunate consequence to a flaw that they might have, for instance if a yandere was very brash and violent they might end up accidentally killing the s/o who was protecting someone. Or it might be something that is more built up, like a problem with insecurity that ends up with the death of the s/o, because they feel like they just aren't good enough for them. It could also be something that is done on purpose, like the s/o's existence means the end of the world and they force the yandere to kill them. Or it could be in a more antagonistic way, like the yandere killing the s/o to force them into hell with them. Having these characterization makes the yandere feel more interesting or at least gives reason to the way that they are.

Second, consider the feelings the yandere has after killing the s/o. Most of the time, the yandere kills the s/o and the story ends, either because its the end of a long story or because the story itself is a one-shot. Unfortunately this means that we don't actually see what the effects of the death will cause the yandere. Assuming that the story doesn't end with just the yandere killing the s/o, we can delve deeper into what kind of feelings the yandere may feel. If the death was an accident, for instance, the yandere may feel despair over their death and blame it on themselves. They may take their own life or try to find a way to revive their loved ones. They may feel accomplishment if they were a reluctant yandere, where they won't feel shackled to having the obsessive feelings anymore. It's likely that they will mourn over their s/o, and if they are an enlightened yandere, they may be able to move on, but if they are more delusional, they may believe that the s/o is still alive and treat their bodies as such. There's a lot of reactions to death, both good and bad, so it might be interesting to see how a yandere would react to something as drastic as their s/o's death.

Third, consider the s/o themselves and how their death may affect other people besides the yandere. Even if the s/o is extremely bland with little character, it's hard to believe that nobody would care about their death. The s/o should have some semblance of character, even if it is a bit of a cliche, such as being very rash, being responsible, being cold, really anything that can distinguish them from just a plain MC. If you consider the death of the s/o, we might also see how others around them felt, whether they cared for the s/o or if they absolutely hated them can help give the s/o more character even after death. For instance, if everyone absolutely hated the s/o, they might feel that the only way to escape being isolated is death, which is what they enlist the yandere to do. Or perhaps they feel that death is the only way to achieve enlightenment and tries to manipulate the yandere into killing them. Perhaps the s/o really hates the yandere, so as revenge, they somehow get the yandere to kill them to scar them forever. Maybe, the s/o is a very clumsy person, and despite being warned again and again by the yandere to be careful, they end up being in the yandere's path and end up being killed because of their carelessness. This all gives development of the yandere and the s/o's relationship together, which could help in why the yandere acts the way that they do, and the cause of the s/o's death.

All in all, the death of an s/o by the hands of the yandere can prove to be an interesting trope if written correctly. Just like any cliche can be made interesting again with a bit of tweaking, so writing the death of an s/o through the yandere can be as well. There's no right or wrong way to write it, just try to make the story and interesting and fulfilling one to experience.

[kythed]

circus mirrors & stereo hearts

sugawara koushi x reader

this one goes out to my new friend, @twat-101 :) it’s a bit long, but I hope you still like it ! sending lotsa love your way <3

synopsis: (y/n) is struggling with her mental health so her best friend suga-san invites her over to study. general chaos and dumbassery ensues.

warnings: some swearing, mentions of mental health struggles, suga’s tone deaf singing.

word count: 4,226

--

Koushi always kept his windows open. Always.

In the winter, this transformed his room into a tiny Antarctica, replete with stray snowflakes, but in the summer, it meant cool tradewinds cutting through the typically stifling heat, creating a little pocket of the ideal climate. You often found yourself there in these warmer months, perched on the corner of his bed, contently listening to him blithely gossip about his teammates or playing a giggly game of Connect Four rife with not so subtle cheating.

Today, a sunny August Saturday, was no different. Koushi sat cross legged on the carpet. Sprawled out across his pale blue comforter, which smelled of fresh linen and that familiar Old Spice he’d been wearing since the eighth grade, you listened to him recite a chapter from your history book, something about post World War II foreign policy. Struggling to remain attentive, however, you found yourself spiraling into those cheerless resignations of hopelessness that had been far too frequent for you lately.

“--which resulted in Europe’s economic recovery chiefly in terms of raw materials, food, and fuel. The Soviet Union soon attempted to replicate a similar plan but ultimately-- hey, (Y/N)?”

You blinked hard and sunk back into reality, turning onto your cheek to look Koushi in his big brown eyes full of rather matronly concern. “Hmm?”

“Do you know what we’re learning about right now?” he asked, sounding both amused and disapproving. A strand of grey fell in front of his face and he quickly blew it away, smiling slightly. “Because it seems like you’ve been zoning out for the last ten or so minutes. I wanted to give you the benefit of the doubt, but Mr. Shishido specifically said this chapter was going to be on the test.”

“Uh… something about muzzer Roosia?” you joked with an exaggerated accent.

Koushi rolled his eyes and flicked your forehead. You yelped and glared at him reproachfully. “We were talking about the Marshall Plan. The United States’ recovery aid program for Western Europe after wartime devastation.”

“Right, right, I knew that,” you protested as Koushi tugged on your forearms and you toppled off the bed, nearly landing right on top of him. With a soft laugh, he extracted his limbs from yours and plopped his head into your lap like he used to when you were kids, resting beneath the boughs of that little oak tree in his backyard, listening to a choir of cicadas croon under a late afternoon sun. The ghost of a grin flitted over your face as you looked back on those halcyon days of your childhood. Usually Koushi’s mom would come out onto the porch with a couple of already-melting lemon popsicles in hand, and the two of you would scramble out of each other’s embrace and tear towards her, breathlessly racing for a priceless reward of sweet smiles and sticky hands.

What you wouldn’t give to go back to that time of gleeful oblivion, before your world became characterized by that all too persistent self-consciousness and excruciating anxiety. What you wouldn’t give to once again feel worthy of Koushi’s innocent adoration…

“--(Y/N)!”

For the second time today, you shook yourself awake. Koushi gazed up at you, brows furrowed. “Sorry, what were you saying?”

“I was asking if you needed to take a little study break. Obviously, you do. I swear, your attention span gets shorter every day.” He pointed somewhere behind you. “Mind grabbing my phone? It’s on the bed.”

You leaned over as far as you could without disturbing Koushi’s position, head still nestled in your lap, and swept your hand over the covers before it bumped into his phone, which you promptly snatched and dropped onto his stomach. He gave a soft “oomph” at the impact before pulling up his Spotify and selecting a playlist, the cover of which was a selfie of the two of you at last year’s spring carnival. A blurred sakura tree provided the perfect backdrop for your smiling faces pressed cheek-to-cheek to fit in the frame. Sugar dusted the corners of Koushi’s mouth, the last trace of the powdered donut you’d shared right before.

“What’s that? I don’t think I’ve listened to that one before.” You reached for the phone, but Koushi held it out just out of reach as music began to play, batting your hand away. “I look awful in that picture; you could’ve chosen something a little more flattering.”

“Oh, shush. You looked pretty that day, wearing that blue sundress with the little flowers on the hem… blue really suits you, you know.” Koushi smiled fondly at his screen, and you blushed despite yourself. “It’s a compilation of all our songs. I listened to this a lot last summer when you were in France with your family for a month. Whenever I missed you. You were off climbing the Eiffel Tower or making croissants and I was lounging around here, bored out of my mind and wishing you were home so we could be bored together.”

“You sappy bastard,” you said, though you really felt quite touched. “I didn’t even realize we had a song.”

“Not just a song,” he corrected. “Songs. Plural. Most of the songs we’ve ever listened to together, I reckon. Anything that reminds me of you, I put on here.”

“Why in the world would you do that?” you asked, aghast at his effort.

Koushi laughed at your surprise. “You’re my best friend, (Y/N). And believe or not, you mean a lot to me. I just like remembering the stuff we’ve done together.”

You nodded slowly, letting your fingers rest on his forehead and gently play with his grey locks. His eyes closed as you settled into a brief, comfortable almost-silence, tainted only by the soft, muffled melody trickling from tiny phone speakers. You cocked your head. “What song is this?”

“You don’t remember?” Koushi asked, sounding almost offended. He turned the volume up a few notches and held the phone closer to your ear.

Let's Marvin Gaye and get it on

You got the healing that I want

Just like they say it in the song

Until the dawn, let's Marvin Gaye and get it on

“I don’t know if--” you cut off as it dawned on you. “Wait… no way. This isn’t…?”

“It is.” Koushi laughed as your face flushed a vivid crimson. “Uchimura’s party.”

Though embarrassed, you grinned, remembering that night. “The song that played at her twelfth birthday while we were in the closet during seven minutes in heaven.”

“We were way too young for that dumb game,” Koushi said with a smile, shaking his head. “God, I was so nervous. That was my first kiss, you know.”

“It was mine too,” you admitted. You remembered sitting on the carpeted floor of Uchimura’s rather cramped closet, knees touching, just barely able to see the outline of Koushi’s face illuminated by the smallest sliver of light shining through a crack in the door. He’d leaned forward, taking your hand in his own small clammy one. “It was really just a peck, though. It might not have counted.”

“It counted,” said Koushi firmly. “Whenever I get asked about my first kiss, I say it was ours. I say it was the best one I’ve ever had, too.”

You shook your head with a soft laugh. “Now, I know that’s a lie. I didn’t know what the hell I was doing.”

“Neither did I,” agreed Koushi. He caught your eye, crinkling his nose cutely. “That’s what made it so sweet. It was innocent. I tasted your bubblegum chapstick on my lips afterwards.”

“Bubblegum chapstick, huh?” You rolled your eyes and poked him softly in the ribs. “I couldn’t look you straight in the eyes for like three weeks after that.”

“I remember. You kept running away whenever I tried to talk to you.”

“Yeah, I know. I’m not sure we would’ve even stayed friends if Ms. Miyato hadn’t partnered us up for the volcano project at the end of that month.” You recalled those afternoons spent in Koushi’s kitchen, newspapers covering every visible surface and a huge, paper-mache volcano resting on the dining table, splattered with orange and yellow paint and smelling strongly of Elmer’s glue and vinegar. Oftentimes, work sessions would dissolve into paint fights, staining your school uniforms with small, colorful hand prints.

“Nah,” said Koushi confidently. “I wouldn’t have let you go that easily.”

“Maybe you should’ve,” you said under your breath.

Koushi stared at you for a second, sighing. Then he reached up to grasp your hand, interlocking his fingers with yours and softly stroking his thumb across your palm. “You know, it was Uchimura’s eighteenth last weekend. You didn’t come.”

“Yeah. I had to study.” That was a lie. You just hadn’t thought anyone really wanted you there. Uchimura had been a friend of yours for years, but she had plenty of other friends to celebrate with. Probably didn’t even notice you weren’t there…

“She asked me where you were,” Koushi continued. “I said I didn’t know because you didn’t answer my texts that night.”

“Sorry,” you said quietly, avoiding eye contact. “Studying.”

“On a Friday night?” You didn’t answer, and Koushi squeezed your hand. “I had to choose Daichi for my charades partner… do you have any idea how shit he is at charades? He flopped on the ground and started convulsing, so I guessed ‘epilepsy.’ Guess what the word really was.”

“What?”

“Orgasm. The word was orgasm. You’d think he could just execute a simple pelvic thrust and make a face, but no, he had to go ahead and act like my great uncle Kaito when he had that heart attack at his ninety-fifth birthday last year.”

You cracked a small smile, imagining Daichi violently wiggling on the floor like a fish out of water. “Sounds like I missed out, then.”

“You really did,” said Koushi, eyes twinkling. He suddenly got solemn. “I missed you. Would’ve been a million times more fun with you there.”

“I doubt it.” You fiddled with the edge of your shirt, smile fading. “I can be a real killjoy sometimes.”

“Not to me,” said Koushi. “Whenever you walk into the room, suddenly that’s the only room I wanna be in.”

Your breath caught in your throat and you swallowed thickly. “Koushi… why are you telling me this?”

“You’ve been avoiding me,” he said simply. He took your hand again, the one that had been playing with his hair, and held it to his chest. You felt his heart beat erratically beneath your palm. “You’ve been avoiding all our friends in general.”

“That’s not true,” you protested, though your heart sank. He had noticed. You wished you didn’t have to drag him into all your problems. “I’ve just been busy.”

“Busy with what, (Y/N)? Homework? Our physics teacher came and talked to me at my locker after school, asking if you’ve been struggling with any personal issues, because apparently you haven’t been turning in your assignments.” Koushi glanced up at you. “It seems like you’ve just been locked away in your room whenever you’re not in class. Not doing work, not going out. Remember a couple weeks ago, when I asked if you wanted to go see that movie with me at the drive-in? You said you had a family dinner in town, but later I passed by on my bike and your bedroom light was on. And today, it took four separate phone calls before you finally picked up and I managed to invite you over… I’ve been worried.”

“Maybe I’m just changing,” you protested weakly. “That’s a thing that happens. People change.”

“I agree, you have been changing. Just not for the better.” Koushi squeezed your hand again, his skin warm on your own. “I haven’t seen you smile, really smile, for ages. You’re always faking these days. What���s going on?”

“I…” you trailed off, trying to think of some excuse. The last thing you wanted was for Koushi to see what was really going on inside your head.

“The truth, (Y/N).”

You relented, shoulders sagging. “Just been tired, I guess.”

“Tired of what?”

“Tired of…” Your eyes grew moist despite your best efforts and you fought to keep from choking on the sob rising up your throat.

“Tired of…?” he pressed on, eyebrow raised.

Your next words tumbled out in a rush. “Just tired of being me, okay? It’s like… it’s just like, whenever I look in the mirror… I don’t like what I see. I don’t like myself, so I don’t want to be me anymore. I’m so tired of it. And I feel like everyone else is, too. Everyone is tired of my shit, so I thought I’d just do you all a favor and disappear.”

Your words stunned Koushi into silence. He remained resting in your lap for a few long seconds before he felt something hot and wet roll down his cheek. A tear. But not his own.

He looked up just in time for another one of your tears to land on his face, right underneath his eye. Quickly, he sat up and tenderly cupped your face in his hands, gently brushing the tears away with his thumbs. “Oh, (Y/N)... c’mere. That’s such bullshit.”

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” you hiccupped as he pulled you into his lap by your waist-- facing him-- and gingerly tucked your head into the crook of his neck. “I’m sorry you have to see me like this. It’s gross, I know.”

“It’s not gross,” said Koushi, fiercely hugging you to his chest. “It’s much better than watching you try to pretend like you’re fine. I don’t care if your snot gets on my shirt-- that’s a small price to pay. So long as I can be there for you right now.”

You cried harder, immense guilt racking your body at his inexplicable kindness. “I’ve been treating you terribly these past few months, but you’re still so good to me. Goddamnit, Koushi. I don’t deserve you.”

Koushi pulled you back by the shoulders, narrowed eyes searching your face, though tears continued to stream down your cheeks. “(Y/N). You don’t have to earn my love.”

“I-- love?” you asked, eyes wide. You snatched a tissue from Koushi’s bedside table and blew your nose loudly.

“Yeah,” he said firmly, without missing a beat. “I said it. I love you. And don’t ask if I mean in a friend way or a girlfriend way, because the answer is neither. I love you like you’re the person I wanna spend the rest of my life with. I don’t care if that means as, like, your husband or just as your best friend. Whatever I can get, I’m happy with, because I love you like you’re a part of me. Unconditionally. I thought you knew that.”

“Please, don’t say that,” you sobbed, covering your face with your hands. “I’m not good enough for you. I’m really not.”

Koushi pulled your hands away so he could look you in the eye. “What don't you understand about the term ‘unconditional love’? It’s unconditional. There is literally nothing you nor anyone else can say or do to change that. Unconditional love is not a feeling, it’s a choice, and I’ve made that choice. I’ve had nearly two decades to think about it, so now I’m telling you I will love you no matter what. I always have, alright? This isn’t exactly how I wanted to say it, but it’s true.”

You stared at him, disbelieving. You hadn’t known he’d felt this way. Of course, you two had been partners-in-crime your entire lives, and you couldn’t count the number of times he’d materialized at your side as soon as you were in the slightest bit of trouble. Whenever you were a dollar short at the canteen, he’d stuff a five in your hand and push you towards the front of the line. That time you went camping with his family and you forgot your sleeping bag, he’d given you his and spent the night shivering. He always carried an extra pen for you because yours often inexplicably ran out of ink in the middle of a test. He’d been there for every crush, boyfriend, and breakup, cheering you on and drying your tears when the time came. He’d been there when your pet dog died and you planned a funeral in your backyard, complete with a little cardboard headstone, holding an umbrella above your head when it began to rain but you weren’t done mourning. He’d just always been there when you needed him.

You’d tried to be there for him, too, because, as you had begun to realize, his pain was your pain and vice versa. That time when you were six and he’d lost his favorite stuffed animal (a giraffe) it had felt like you’d lost yours too. That day in junior high when he fell out of the oak tree trying to retrieve a stray frisbee and broke his arm, you swore you felt the same pain in yours. Last year when he got dumped outside the gym on Valentine’s Day and you found him sitting in a corner, trying to hide the fact he’d obviously been crying-- you’d stayed late to crack stupid jokes and eat the chocolate he meant to give to his girlfriend, because he deserved a girl who would eat the damn chocolate. Not stomp on his heart and leave it to bleed. I love you like you’re a part of me. You understood.

“It’s okay to not be okay sometimes, but it’s not okay to bundle it all up and bury it deep inside when you have someone right next to you wanting to help you bear that burden.” Koushi’s voice shook just slightly. “It just… it hurts to see you like this, okay? (Y/N), if you love me back, then let me help you. Let me be there for you. Please.”

You were silent for a moment, staring into his pleading eyes. Those beautiful brown eyes.

Then you took a deep breath and started laughing through the tears. You were sure you looked insane, puffy eyes, red nose, and mascara running down your cheeks, but it didn’t matter. “I do. I love you, too. I love you. I didn’t know I loved you before, but now I do, because if you were torn away from me that heartbreak would probably kill me. No, it would definitely kill me. And it would hurt like a motherfucker while it did.”

Koushi let out the breath he’d been holding then, after a brief pause, began to laugh with you as you laced your arms around the back of your neck. “Oh, yeah? Well, losing you would probably hurt like a father-fucker to me.”

“Is that worse than a motherfucker?” you asked, giggling at the ridiculousness of it all. Here you were, bawling on the floor of your best friend’s room while you confessed your love to one another and cussed each other out at the same time.

“For sure. It’s a million times worse than a motherfucker. It’s like, if something hurting like a motherfucker is the equivalent of getting shot by a Nerf gun, something hurting like a fatherfucker probably feels like getting run over by a tank.” Koushi intertwined his fingers with yours yet again and smiled.

“You’re a dumbass,” you said, but you laughed anyways as Koushi looked proud of himself.

“I know,” he said softly, affectionately. “But I’m your dumbass.”

You sighed and shook your head. “I’d love you to be. But you could still do so much better than me--”

“Will you stop saying that, already?” Koushi took your face in his hand, stroking his thumb right beneath your eye. “You’re the most radiant person I’ve ever met. Notice how I didn’t say ‘beautiful’ because the word beautiful doesn’t even begin to cover it. Although you are that, too.”

“Oh, goodness. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again-- you’re so sappy.”

Koushi rolled his eyes with a smile. “Yeah, I am. You like it though.”

“You caught me,” you said as he leaned forward and pressed a soft kiss to your forehead. You leaned into it, savoring the warmth of his lips on your skin. “I do.”

“But really, (Y/N),” he said seriously. “It astounds me that you don’t realize that.”

“Don’t realize what?”

“That you’re cool! You’re so cool and fun and awesome. And a zillion other adjectives I could sit here and list out for hours. You’re the only person who can make me laugh when I cry, and you make the best hot chocolate I’ve ever tasted, and you’re a literal god at Mario Kart, and you’ve got the prettiest eyes I’ve ever had the privilege to look into.” You flushed as Koushi thought for a moment, chewing on his lip before his eyes widened. “It’s kinda like a circus mirror, I think.”

“What?” You furrowed your brow.

“The way you see yourself is like someone looking into one of those circus mirrors. It makes you look too tall, or really squished, or just bent out of shape in general. And if that was the only mirror you’d ever looked into, you’d probably think that ugly, distorted reflection is how you actually look in real life. You can’t see yourself for how amazing you really are-- but everyone else can.”

“Well, aren’t you just full of relevant analogies today?” you teased. A circus mirror. Now that was something new. You had to give Koushi credit for the comparison-- it actually did kind of make sense.

“What can I say?” he said, puffing out his chest. “I’m a poet.”

“So I guess that would make you my real mirror then?” you offered shyly. Koushi looked confused for a second. “If the way I see myself is supposedly ‘distorted,’ then you can reflect to me how I supposedly really am.”

“Oh, yes!” he said happily. “I’m the mirror. I like that. Quit talking like you don’t believe me, though. You’re incredible. A little thick-skulled sometimes, yes, but incredible nonetheless.”

“It’s going to be hard for me,” you said quietly, gently running a hand through his hair. “Really hard. I haven’t liked myself for a long time.”

“I know. I know. But someday, you’ll be able to understand what a beautiful human being you are. I’m sure of it. I need you to promise you won’t give up until that happens.”

He held out his pinky for a pinky swear, something you two did frequently as children. You smiled and laced your pinky with his. “Alright. I promise.”

“Good.” Koushi stood up, brushed the wrinkles from his pants, and offered you his hand. You took it and he pulled you up. “Listen. Do you remember this song?”

His little playlist had been playing this entire time. You hadn’t noticed. You strained to catch the lyrics. “Turn it up a little, I can’t quite hear.”

...a stereo

It beats for you, so listen close

Hear my thoughts in every note

“Koushi.” A slow smile spread across your face. “Tell me this isn’t Stereo Hearts.”

“Oh, this is Stereo Hearts alright!” he responded gleefully. He took your hand and spun you around like a ballroom dancer, catching you before you tripped over his bedside table. “You remember when we--”

“When we performed it at the junior high talent show and got booed off the stage?” You giggled, remembering that awful night that was somehow hilarious in retrospect. “I still have nightmares about that.”

Koushi continued to swing you around in some sort of clumsy dance, pulling you this way and that while you laughed wildly. “It’s ‘cause you were such a shit singer.”

You gasped in mock offense. “No way! You’re a much worse singer than I am. At least I can carry a tune.”

Koushi just rolled his eyes and grabbed a hairbrush from his shelf, using it like a microphone. He sat you down on the edge of the bed and began to serenade you in his terrible, tone-deaf manner.

Make me your radio

Turn me up when you feel low

This melody was meant for you

Just sing along to my stereo

“God, you really do suck at this,” you said, but he just smiled and kept singing. You had to admit, it was sweet. As silly as the memory associated with the song was, it remained a nostalgic favorite even now. You had to join in a few times, just for memory’s sake.

I only pray you never leave me behind

Because good music can be so hard to find

Koushi sat down next to you and wound one arm around your waist, leaning close.

I take your hand and pull it closer to mine

Thought love was dead, but now you're changing my mind

You turned and leaned in too, nearly touching noses.

“Hey,” he said in an almost whisper. “(Y/N) (L/N), I love you.”

“Hey,” you whispered back, gaze flitting down to his lips and back up again. “I love you, too, you sappy bastard.”

...so sing along to my stereo

“I know.” He closed the remaining inch of distance. Your hand tangled itself in his hair while his tugged your body a little closer.

The kiss was almost as good as the one in Uchimura’s closet all those years ago. Almost.

[holydragon2808]

Thoughts On Dragon Age II after Replaying (Massive Spoilers)

Hello fellow DA fans! It's been quite some time since I last posted anything here on Tumblr. Hope everyone has been safe during all of the world's craziness. Figured I'd post something to let people know I'm still alive.

Anyway, DA2 was first released back in 2011. I was 20-21 years old at the time. Back then, while I still acknowledged the lack of genuine player agency with Hawke (in comparison to the Warden before them), I did belong in the camp of people believing that people went way overboard with the DA2 critiques regarding those complaints, at least back then.

Now though? After replaying the game again a decade or so later, and also in light of the Inquisitor and DAI, I now personally believe that Hawke's story stands out as (overall), all the more unbalanced in comparison to both the Warden and Inquisitor.

Massive Spoilers for the franchise abound beyond this point. Last warning.

Despite a lot of the old critiques leveled at DA2, it isn't a 100% terrible experience, and despite the oncoming rant, I do love the game overall.

Even though I've personally always thought that DA2 story was centered around tragedy a bit TOO much, in light of the growing franchise and the directional tone of the other protagonists thus far, it unfortunately stands out even more to me, and not in a good way.

A shame really because DA2 could have been a better and interesting contrast to DAO in tone and direction had it been more balanced with meaningful successes and failures for Hawke as a character rather than veering too far over into angst and tragedy.

For example, in DAO, your Warden character is railroaded into success against the Blight no matter what. Regardless of the origin, regardless of what sort of allies you acquire, no matter if you live or die in the end or which warden gets the final blow, you succeed.

This sort of narrative framing gave the writers a much easier way to balance genuine tragedy and success throughout the journey without veering too far in one direction or the other, and also without making nearly everything the player does seem like an exercise in futility.

In other words, there were failures and successes more properly balanced throughout, from experiencing meaningful failures and heartache during the chosen origin stories, to failure at Ostagar, to having more balance with the party members and their struggles (they weren't too boring or too dysfunctional), romances that stood out as a light for the Warden amidst all the fighting and death and their massive burden, to succeeding with building the army to take on the Darkspawn, to potential personal sacrifice to save the world and so on.

The option to play a more tragic, angsty or "evil" character who alienates everyone around them and then ultimately dies in the end is there too. The point is that the game largely gave the player the reins and let THEM decide what sort of story they were interested in shaping within the confines of the narrative railroading.

This balance just isn't there with DA2 as the player progresses. Hawke is railroaded into failure in almost every way from start to finish, whether in their personal life or with the massive political struggles in Kirkwall.

I'm sure most people would have been fine with the main plot between the mages/Templars spiraling out of their control in the end (thanks Anders), the Qunari rampaging no matter what, and even the Hawke family being forcefully separated as the story progressed.

However, to me some of the railroaded bleak tragedy should have been offset by Hawke (and by extension the player) at least having the OPTION of being able to keep their family alive.

I'm fine with the tragedy of losing the whole family being ONE POSSIBLE option in the game, but when this tragedy along with the main plot failures, the dysfunctional party members that are too problematic to help ease Hawke's burdens (in fact, they all add to Hawke's worries, which if Inquisition shows anything, that it finally takes its toll on Hawke) is THE ONE AND ONLY OPTION in light of everything else wrong in Kirkwall, then that's a potential writing issue and could potentially alienate the player more than make them care about anything that happens and wonder why they aren't given the option to just nope out and leave Kirkwall to its fate.

Tragedy can be fine, don't get me wrong, but not everyone wants to role play a COMPLETE AND UTTER tragedy from start to finish with no option to deviate in any way from that narrative. Options in the way people progress (especially where people can break the story down and see the holes in the narrative where it COULD have possible but just wasn't allowed), should be presented in a ROLE PLAYING game.

I personally find it more realistic and relatable when a character experiences a nice blend of both MEANINGFUL success and failure. However, the writers seemed intent on railroading Hawke into just being at the mercy of the main plot with little to no agency.

In stark contrast to DAO, planning for the entire story in DA2 (or just in an RPG period) to end in failure no matter the player choices is already a bold enough risk on its own. It can definitely work with the proper balance of both positive and negative experiences along the way though in both the political and personal aspects of the player characters life, to keep the player actively engaged in a way that doesn't leave them thinking that their presence in the story amounts to little more than the equivalent of holding a book and simply turning the page rather than actively doing something.

But combining an already planned bleak ending with a very corrupt setting where the leaders on all sides are either completely moronic or passive, party members where the majority of them have too many burdens of their own to give Hawke a genuine sense of a reprieve from the madness even if romancing one of them (except for Varric, Aveline, and Bethany, if alive, everyone else is either a whiner or dysfunctional. It's very telling that Hawke's PET DOG gets more no strings attached visits from the party members than Hawke does. Just saying), railroading Hawke to lose the majority of their family in some way, AND having what little success and influence Hawke DOES acquire to come back and bite them in the ass in the end (Hawke struck it rich and became Champion of Kirkwall?! Awesome!.....right up until its revealed the red lyrium idol they found in the deep roads played a part in screwing up everything), then at that point, a serious argument can be made that the writers veered far too heavily into tragic overdone melodrama for some people.

How cool would it have been to be able to leave the game with "Well, okay, I couldn't do anything about the corruption in Kirkwall or the mage/Templar tensions spiraling out of control, but at least my whole family is alive and well"? There could have even been an achievement/trophy for this very outcome called "The pride of the Hawkes" or something.

Just one possible example of how the railroaded political failures could have been offset by giving Hawke, (and by extension the player), the OPTION for personal success in a more meaningful way. The option for extreme tragedy with some or even all of the Hawkes dying can still be there of course for people who want that degree of angst, but again having multiple OPTIONS is more likely to accommodate more people and their preferred play styles or stories, and thus, give more reasons to play the game multiple times.

As it stands now, sure, Hawke can save the life of one sibling, but they're still railroaded into losing one of them before the prologue is over, the other is either killed by the Blight or forced from their side in act 1 because the game said so, and the mother is forced to die in the most shock value induced way possible (nevermind not even being able to warn Leandra in act one or follow up on this quest until it's too late in act two or the guards and Templars being forcefully incompetent for this to play out like the writers want).

Those have just been my thoughts as of late. Some people argue that in a way, this is the entire point of the game. That sometimes only REALLY crappy choices exist and there may not be a third option. I agree with that to a point.

But "there might not be" and "there NEVER is" an option for an ideal third way are two very different things and IMO, DA2 suffered in veering far too heavily in the direction of the latter, often being too focused on heartbreak and shock value (looking at you "All That Remains") to really work as well as it could have.

Anyway, these are just my thoughts a decade later. Make no mistake, I still love DA2 for what it is, love the general concept and idea of DA2, just not the execution. It's just sad to me that this game could have been so much better with more development time, more options to shape Hawke's story on a more personal level (whether with an ideal outcome of everyone in the family living, or a semi tragic one where some can die depending on choices, or everyone dying), and not being railroaded into tragedy to nearly nigh ridiculous levels to the point where a giant spider nightmare residing in the Fade in a whole other game mocks Hawke for their "failure is the only option" status.

And just to further clarify my point here, true, Kirkwall was a ticking time bomb with or without Hawke being there. They made the tensions between the two factions apparent as far back as DAO. A Mage/Templar war was all but inevitable, as was Anders eventually losing himself to Justice/Vengeance and after exhausting all peaceful options, finally doing the unthinkable and "forcing everyone to choose a side". That part was fine. And it makes sense for this part of the story to remain static and unchanged no matter what (as I said before, the issue isn't necessarily that DA2 had a planned tragic ending or was framed as a set story within a story).

The issue is that, at the end of the day, regardless of whether this is framed as a recounting of events already played out, Bioware still chose to present this part of the story to the world as an RPG, not a novel. It's just too easy to pick apart the current execution of the narrative and find too many holes and inconsistencies, far too easy to see that Bioware wanted tragedy and completely railroaded the player into it regardless of whether or not it made sense to do so at times. Part of it is definitely that it was rushed, but not all of it.

" Genuine inevitable tragedy" (example: the mage/Templar rebellion) and "railroaded and just never given the option to question/change anything because the game/developers said so but still forcefully insisting and trying to frame it as an inevitable tragedy" are two very different things (outright confirming in Act 1 that the remains of the serial killer's vicitms did indeed belong to one of the missing women (Ninette's wedding ring) and he gave them white lilies but conveniently never given the option to bring any of this up to the guards/Templars or pursue the quest or warn Leandra until it's far too late). Leandra's death isn't the only example of this problem, but it definitely is one of the most prominent and IMO, takes away from the intended story of a good woman who met a bad end with their oldest son/daughter being unable to prevent it when the game failed to let them (and by extension the player) truly try.

DA2 could have been a great contrast to DAO. Rather than having the influence to shape the fate of the world like the Warden and succeed in their goal, they could have compromised in DA2 with having the fallout of the Kirkwall Chantry destruction and the rebellion still happening no matter what (i.e. Hawke "failing" to stop any of the madness and still ultimately forced to flee Kirkwall in the end after finally dragging the Amell line back into prominence) but still given the player the option to save their immediate family members across the story if certain choices were made throughout. I'm sure most people would have been fine with a more "bittersweet" option being presented for Hawke, (and by extension the player) in the game, especially where again, one can pick apart the narrative and see where it could have been an option, but just wasn't allowed for no other reason than seemingly because of the "True art is angsty" trope.

Bioware could still have their own canon (similarly to how Alistair is shown to be king in their canon no matter what as an example) of the ultimate tragedy if they wanted, but again, DA2 is still an RPG where players expect to have more meaningful choices reflected in how they progress, even with an inescapable darker and downer ending.

Complete and utter tragedy is fine, but I just don't think it was the best decision to have it as THE ONLY option in an RPG.

[willow-salix]

It’s here, Virgil’s FabFiveFeb

A nice little bit of Virg fluff for @gumnut-logic

"I think he'd like someone that has an interest in creative pursuits," Gordon mused, poking one of the boxes to tick it. 

"And someone that likes to go for walks, you know what he's like for wanting to wander and take in the scenery, maybe even snap some pictures to paint later," Scott added, touching another box to tick it. 

"More of a home body than an adventurer, he gets enough of that with work," Gordon added it to the list. "And they definitely have to believe that family is important, he can't have someone that won't understand his commitments."

"OK, next, all about him," Scott scrolled down to the next section. "His interests…"

"Classical music, obviously."

"Enjoys visiting art galleries and concerts."

"And eating out."

"Don't we all?" 

Gordon nodded at that, there was nothing they liked more than picking up some tasty food. 

"Ideal date? What's that movie he likes? The one with the lake house?" 

"Oh, I know the one you mean, with the…the…" Scott's brain failed to make the connection, romantic comedies were not his thing, that was what Virgil watched with Selene, not him. 

"Doesn't matter," Gordon assured him, brushing it aside. "He liked the date so I'm putting it down. A relaxed stroll along a lake side at sunset," he murmured to himself as he quickly typed it out. 

"That's the one," Scott nodded. "He-" 

"Allie! Have you seen Scott?" The sound of Virgil's voice floating up from the kitchen made them both jump guilty. 

"I think he's in the lounge," Alan shouted back. 

"Shit!" 

"He's coming!" 

"Quick, submit it, submit it!" Gordon smacked at the submit button, growling in frustration when a flashing red 'incomplete field' warning mocked them. 

The sound of steel capped boots thumping up stairs spurred them on. 

"Just tick anything!" Scott yelped, fingers flying as he randomly poked boxes in between Gordon whacking the submit button like it had personally offended him. 

"Yes!" Gordon sighed as the 'congratulations' sign appeared in green. "Done!" 

Scott just had time to hit the x and pull up a report before Virgil strolled his way in. 

"What are you two doing?" he asked suspiciously, stopping dead in the doorway when he was greeted by the sight of the two brothers least likely to be discussing a report seeming to be doing just that. 

"Nothing!" Gordon yelped just as Scott yelled "Reports" which was definitely upping the suspicion levels. He didn't believe them. 

"I don't believe you," Virgil told them firmly, attempting to give them the kind of 'don't lie to me' eyebrow raise that Selene or John managed to pull off but knew he had failed. Damn the fact that he was the nice one and they both knew that any and all threats he might issue would go unfulfilled. 

"You doubt me?" Scott gasped in mock outrage. "Me? Your big brother? The one that always has your back?" 

"And me, your wingman? The one that always fixes your hairdryer fuse?" 

"One time Gordon! That was one time! And it wasn't my hairdryer!" 

"I don't know, you bought it, you keep it in your bathroom and you warned us all that we couldn't borrow it on pain of death, so that evidence all points to it being your hairdryer…" 

"I won't stay here to be insulted," Virgil sniffed indignantly, "I'm gonna go find Kayo and see if she'll help me with the inlet manifold, at least she can take instructions and won't lie to me."

They watched him stomp away in a huff, breathing a sigh of relief when the sound of his boots faded into nothing. 

"Damn, that was close," Scott gulped, clicking back onto the dating website to check it had worked. His eyes widened when he looked at the screen. 

"What? What's wrong?" 

"He's got three inboxes already."

"Seriously? Already, it's been what, five minutes?" 

"Yep."

"We’re gonna be spoilt for choice."

"I guess that just means we have more chance of picking him a good one, he needs to get out more."

"He'll thank us for it in the end."

       ***

"I don't understand, why do I have to dress up?" Virgil groaned. "I'm tired, I've had a long day, why do we need to go to the mainland just to pick up pizza?" 

Gordon glanced at Scott for help. None was forthcoming. He nudged him for emphasis. 

"Fine," Scott sighed, admitting defeat. Honesty was always the best policy anyway. "We arranged a blind date for you."

"You did what?" Virgil exploded. "Why the hell would you do that?" 

"We thought you needed to get out more," Gordon shrugged. "We were trying to help."

"I don't need your help, I didn't ask for it."

"Not like you were going to meet anyone on your own, was it?" Gordon continued to needle.

"John did! So did Scott. I am perfectly capable of getting my own dates."

"John is an enigma that none of us understand and Cat's my ex, I was recycling, that doesn't count."

"Do not let her hear you say that," Gordon laughed. 

"My point still stands," Scott insisted waving away the worry about his girlfriend, "we don't have a normal job or the chance to socialise much, and unless fate decides to be nice and throw someone at you like it did for John or you have an ex hidden away somewhere, you can't use us as an example."

"You don't want to let her down, do you?" Gordon tossed in, knowing that his softie brother would feel guilty as hell if he upset anyone. "How would you feel if you got dumped before you'd even met the person?" 

Virgil wanted to argue the point some more, but honesty and his vow never to lie to himself stopped him. They did have a point, a small one, but still pointy and therefore he was unable to ignore their logic. He decided to give in, although he refused to do so gracefully or with any forgiveness of their plotting. Plus, they were right, he wouldn't want to be responsible for anyone feeling like they weren't good enough in any way, shape or form.

"Looks like I don't have much of a choice…" he started only to be interrupted by the victorious cheers of his brothers. "Do you have a picture of her?" 

"Nope," Scott grinned. "We signed you up with that new site where pictures aren't allowed, you pick based on shared interests and compatibility, not looks."

"That's…actually a nice idea," Virgil acknowledged reluctantly. He wasn't one to judge people on looks, he cared more about personality and morals. 

"See, we knew you'd approve," Gordon grinned, slapping him on the back. 

"I didn't say I approved of this-" 

"Come on, hurry up, you don't want to be late for your date!" 

   ***

Virgil waited nervously on the picnic bench, clutching the single sunflower Scott had thrust at him like it was a weapon, ready to fend off anything if his blind date turned out to be some kind of psycho.

They couldn't be too careful, they were far too used to people trying to find out details about them or to trick them in some way. No one was ever as they seemed. 

Scott had assured him that they hadn't used his real name and that no one would associate it with him but he couldn't help the little nagging doubts that gnawed away at the back of his mind. 

Plus he still hadn't forgiven them for pulling this stunt on him. Did they really think he was that bad at dating that he needed such help? He wasn't bad at dating, he got plenty of offers for a hook up, they all did. Well, not John but he was hardly ever out on rescues and Selene was common knowledge now but, to the rest of the world, him and his "single" brothers were all fair game. 

Butt gropes and comments about their hard muscles were a common occurrence, so much so that he often felt like a piece of meat being squished and tested before purchase. Another reason why he rarely managed to meet anyone that he could actually see himself wanting to date. 

Maybe their idea, while badly executed and heavy in trickery and taken liberties, hadn't come from a bad place. He'd worried the whole way to the meeting spot that they might have picked the worst candidate they could, but he firmly forced the thought out of his head. His brothers might like to indulge in mutual pranking and to push the limits sometimes but they would never do anything to hurt or embarrass someone, especially not a stranger. The thought had calmed him down enough that he hadn't had to make use of Two's on board bathroom facilities for an emergency freshen up because he'd stress sweated through the nice shirt and jacket they had forced him into. 

He'd managed to relax a little but, now that he was sitting here alone, waiting and looking out for someone he had no clue about, he was starting to worry again. 

Seeing an abandoned pen on the picnic table he snatched a few napkins from the dispenser and let his eyes roam the scenery. 

It really was a gorgeous place, something often referred to as a little slice of heaven in the city. The urban park, man made in the center of the mass of concrete and steel, sported a carefully constructed lake that was home to a teeming ecosystem of endangered species that exhaustive conservation efforts had made possible. 

The sun was just beginning to lower towards the horizon, painting the sky and the surface of the lake with the most beautiful colours. Virgil's fingers itched to paint them but he settled for snapping a couple of pictures on his phone. 

Trees of all types surrounded the lake, creating an attractive backdrop to the whole scene and before he even realised he was doing it he was deep in concentration as he sketched the lake area on the napkin. 

The process was calming, helping to soothe his nerves and slow his thumping heart, allowing him to stop and breathe for a second, helping him to resist the urge to cut and run. 

"Are you Virgil Grant? You have a sunflower." 

The voice behind him made him jump and drop his pen. 

"Yes, yes I am," he admitted as he turned around to face his date. 

      ***

"So, how did it go?" Scott asked when they arrived to pick Virgil up, less than half an hour after he'd text for a ride. "Did you have a good time?" 

"I had a great time," Virgil smiled. 

"You were gone a long time," Gordon grinned, nudging his older brother playfully with his elbow. "Did you go back to her place or something?" 

"Yeah, we did."

"You did? You dog you!" Gordon leered with an exaggerated wink. Virgil just smiled, taking the teasing with his usual good grace. 

"You gonna see her again?" Scott asked, pleased that their plan seemed to have gone so well. 

Virgil nodded. "I told her I'd drop in as soon as I'm free."

"Come on, give us all the juicy details, tell us all about, Emma, wasn't it?" Gordon pushed, desperate for gossip. 

"Nothing much to tell," Virgil shrugged. "She's sweet, we had a nice time hanging out, she gave me her number."

"That's it? That's all you can tell us?" Gordon groaned, disappointment evident in his voice. 

"No, that's all I'm going to tell you," Virgil corrected. "You've interfered in my private life enough already, thank you."

"Oh, come on, Virg," Scott pleaded. But the big guy wouldn't budge, staying smugly silent the entire journey home. 

Gordon and Scott had given up by the time they eased the little jet back into the hangar, going off to do their own thing, hopefully to remove his dating profile, leaving Virgil alone. 

Selene and John were cuddled up together on one of the couches, watching something on the holoscreen when he made his way into the lounge. 

He hadn't meant to disturb them, especially when they were actually getting some time alone for once, and was about to make his excuses but Selene had other ideas. She patted the couch beside her, shifting over to make room for him. 

He accepted the offer, sitting down and getting comfortable. He didn't know what they were watching, possibly some kind of documentary. 

"Cookie?" he offered, pulling a baggie of what looked to be pretty decent cookies out of his jacket pocket. 

Selene glanced up from the screen, looking first at the bag of cookies and then at Virgil, her eyes widening in surprise. 

"You're all dressed up."

This got John's attention as he reached for a cookie. "Have you been somewhere?" 

Selene selected a cookie and took a big bite. "Oh, damn, these are so good, where did you get them?" 

"My date made them for me," Virgil grinned, consuming almost half a cookie in one bite. 

"Wait, wait, back up, date?" Selene actually paused the documentary, something about William Shakespeare by the looks of it. 

"You had a date? That wasn't on the calendar?" John frowned. "Were they cleared by security?" 

"The romance is strong in this family," Selene drawled, rolling her eyes. 

"Scott and Gordon decided that signing me up to dating sites is their new hobby," Virgil sighed. 

"They arrange the date? What were they like? Did you have a good time? Witchy needs details," Selene gently shoved John's face away from her as he chewed loudly in her ear and leant closer to Virgil.

"We actually had a nice time. Emma, my date, is a local, lived there all her life. She's been a bit lonely so her friend set her up on the site. We wandered around a lake for a bit and then we went back to her place."

"Awww, so romantic," Selene sighed dreamily before mock glaring at her husband. "Why don't you take me on dates any more?" 

"Because we only got back off our honeymoon a few weeks ago and we live on an island?" 

"No excuse."

"Dinner on the mainland next week?" 

"Thought you'd never ask," she stole a quick kiss as he rolled his eyes in defeat. "Got any pictures?" 

"Of the restaurant? Are you needing to inspect my reservation making skills now?" 

"I was talking to Virgil."

"Oh, then carry on."

"Virg, pictures?" 

"I did take one, yes," he pulled out his phone, scrolled through for a couple of seconds then turned the phone to show them the screen. "I took a selfie of us at the lake." 

Selene and John blinked, unsure if they were seeing the right picture. 

"Erm… not to be a judgey judgerson or anything but…" Selene trailed off. 

"But she has to be older than Grandma," John finished for her, blunt and to the point as always.

They both looked at the picture again, showing a goofily grinning Virgil next to a sweet older lady, her blue rinsed hair set in a helmet of curls, her half moon glasses perched on her nose. 

"Again, not with the judging, you do you, but does she have to watch her heart? She needs to be careful if she's going out picking up handsome young men."

"Stop, please stop," Virgil groaned. "She didn't know how old I was. Gordon and Scott set it up and apparently they somehow, and I choose to believe it was unintentional, managed to upload my profile to the over 60s side."

"And you didn't correct her?" John had to ask. He knew his brother was the nice one of the family but that was a little ridiculous. 

"Of course I did, but we were there and she hadn't been out in a few weeks. Her grandson moved away for work and her husband died a few years ago so I bought her dinner and we had a nice walk around the park. She wasn't actually looking for a romantic date, she just wanted a companion, someone to chat to, go for a walk with and maybe see an exhibition or two. Her friend at the widows club set it up for her."

"So you were both set up by others?" 

"Yep. She's a really nice lady."

"And that walk around the park turned into cookies at her place?" John's fingers snuck into the bag again to take another. 

"And banana bread. She mentioned that she was going to hire a handyman to fix her sink because her daughter was too busy and she didn't have any help now."

"Ahhh," Selene could see exactly where this was going. 

"And so I offered to unblock her sink for her."

"Of course you did," John sighed, hiding his smile against Selene's shoulder. 

"And while I was there I put up some new shelves for her and took her trash cans out to the kerb and retuned her TV. She made me cookies to say thank you."

"She sounds lovely," Selene cooed, already in love with the thought of her. She could take or leave it when it came to little kids, usually leave if she was being honest, but she was a complete suckee when it came to the elderly. 

"She is, smart too. I complimented some of the paintings she had on her walls and she told me she'd painted them, her and her husband met at art school and used to go on vacation to different countries to visit galleries and take classes. I showed her a few pictures of some of my pieces and it turned out she'd seen one of mine in a gallery in New York, you know that one of the Sphinx I did from that picture I took after that rescue?"

"Do I take it that our darling brothers don't know any of this?" 

"Nope," Virgil grinned. "I'm letting them stay curious, they asked me all sorts of questions on the way back but I stayed quiet. I'll tell them eventually, once all the cookies are gone." He picked another out of the rapidly depleting stash. 

"I have never heard a more Virgil story in my entire life," Selene laughed, shaking her head. "So when are you seeing her again?" 

"Gonna try and visit next week to mow her lawn," Virgil admitted, looking somewhat sheepish. 

"Hey, no," Selene grabbed his hand, squeezing it tight. "No looking embarrassed. You're amazing, it's a totally you thing to go on a date, not get what you were expecting and still come away with an old lady best friend and having had a great time. That's one of the many reasons I love you, because you're just so you."

"She's right," John added, patting his brother's shoulder. "One thing I've learnt the last few years is that you shouldn't make excuses for who you are or try to change. Don't belittle the fact that you have probably made her happier than she has been in months just by giving her some time and treating her with respect. Don't undervalue that."

"Yeah," Virgil acknowledged. "I know I did the right thing, it doesn't hurt to help someone and I had fun too." 

"And that's all that matters," Selene said, patting his hand one last time before she let it go. 

"Yep," he smiled, settling back against the cushions, munching on his cookie, his cheeks bulging like a hamster's, muffling his words. "That and the fact that her granddaughter is a nurse and she's going to introduce us next month."

[botanicallyinclinednerd]

The Game of Camelot (Sat Upon His Throne, All Alone)

Part one of A dark AU for The Coming of Arthur Part 2 where Leon's loyalty is to the people of Camelot alone and he is willing to do anything to save Camelot from being ruled by a tyrannical monster, even if he becomes a monster himself in the process. This is also posted on my AO3 here. 

Warnings for this fic include: Major character death, Murder, Dark Leon, poisoning, nightmares, and hurt no comfort. Please be safe.

~~~

Leon prided himself on his loyalty. He considered himself a loyal knight of Camelot and so did everyone else. It's why no one ever suspected him. Why no one ever stopped to question how he got to where he was today. Why no one stopped to ask why he was king.

~~~

"Sir Leon is a traitor," was a sentence that had never been said by anyone in Camelot. And if anyone had been foolish enough to voice such a thing, they would have, at best, been laughed out of Camelot, and at worst, never left Camelot ever again. Because everyone knew that Leon would die for Camelot. He was loyal to his kingdom to the end.

The misconception was that while Leon was indeed loyal to Camelot, he did not have the same undying loyalty for his king. Uther Pendragon was a tyrant king who ruled with fear and death. He was irrational when it came to magic and his penalty against it was overzealous and extreme. His citizens had suffered under his rule for too long. Someone needed to ensure it ended, one way or another. 

Leon grew up with Morgana, had been her friend since before she became Uther’s ward. When he learned she had magic, he promised to protect her. When he learned about her plans to kill Uther, he pretended to have no idea. When he learned of her parentage and her desire to claim the throne for herself, Leon was supportive but uneasy. When he met Morgause, he faltered. When he learned of the lengths she went to try to kill Arthur by using Gwen and Elyan as bait, Leon's support became an act. Uther was a bad king and he didn't know what kind of king Arthur would be but Leon knew that Morgana would just be another Uther. He couldn't let that happen.

As far as Morgana was concerned, Leon was loyal to her. He made sure this was never in doubt. It could never be in doubt.

~~~

When Morgana told him to kill Arthur, Leon felt uneasy. Arthur was his prince and while he was Uther’s son he was not a bad man. Leon had no ill will towards him and was sincere in his loyalty to him. He didn't want to kill him.

When Morgana suggested he act defiantly when he was brought before Morgana in order to lure Gwen out to make her betray her true loyalties and help Leon escape to find Arthur so Leon could kill both of them at the same time, Leon thought he was going to be sick. She wanted him to kill both the prince and Gwen? Gwen, his childhood friend, his oldest friend? The kindest, sweetest person he has ever known, who wouldn't even hurt a fly? 

Leon wasn't sure he could do that. And yet, somehow, for the good of Camelot, he must.

~~~

There were eight of them. Eight people. Eight witnesses. Eight liabilities. Leon didn't want to kill eight people. Hell, he didn't want to kill the two people he had to kill. But Leon was a strategist. He knew the best shot he had of accomplishing his goal of liberating Camelot from tyranny and fear was to leave no one behind to reveal the treachery he was willing to commit to do it. He didn't want to kill these eight people but he would if he had to.

~~~

"'There is no one else I'd rather die for,'" Leon pledged and maybe what he was about to do would be easier if he was lying. But he wasn't. 

~~~

Leon wasn't comfortable with this. He had killed people before, sure, but in battle as a knight, and those he killed were his enemies. Tonight he would not be acting as a noble knight but as a traitorous assassin, slaughtering people that trusted him. People he knew. Leon didn’t know Merlin well, but he did know that there was more to Merlin that met the eye. He had long suspected that the servant had played at least some part in foiling some of the attacks on Arthur and Camelot over the years. For that alone, he liked Merlin, even before taking into account the boy’s dry wit. Leon liked Gaius as well. And Gwen and Elyan? They had grown up together. He considered them his friends. Hell, he thought of Gwen as his best friend. The whole reason Morgana lost his loyalty in the first place was her willingness to put the two of them in danger. And Arthur…Arthur wasn't his father. He was a good man, and Leon believed he could be a good king, but he also knew that Arthur was like his father in the one way that mattered: he distrusted magic. Leon would even go as far to say he hated it. There was the chance that Arthur may one day change his mind but Leon could not take the risk. There was only one way he could ensure that peace and magic would return to Camelot. In that moment, Leon made a decision he knew he would regret for the rest of his life. He just hoped he would be able to live with it.

~~~

Leon wouldn't call himself a coward. This is not cowardice, he thought, as he laced his companions' food with hemlock. This is not cowardice, he thought as they all began to show symptoms of poisoning. This is not cowardice, he reminded himself as he too pretended to fall ill. It is not cowardice, Leon repeated to himself as he faked a coughing fit while he closed Gaius’s unseeing eyes. This is not cowardice, he thought as he allowed himself to hold Gwen as she wept. This is not cowardice, he reminded himself as he listened to the last of his companions take their final rattling breath. No, he told himself when he opened his eyes and got to his feet, his act of afflicted and dying friend no longer necessary with no one else left alive to witness his deception and betrayal, this was not cowardice. Leon took in the result of his handy work and made himself look at each of them, to look at what he had done. This was kindness.

~~~

Leon knew he couldn't leave the bodies as they were. Morgana expected him to slaughter them, not poison them. He couldn't risk going against her expectations now. If she suspected anything was off, all would be lost and Leon's actions here would have been for nothing. He couldn't let their deaths be in vain. 

So Leon picked up a discarded sword with gold engravings that was not his own and, with a whispered plea for forgiveness, he hacked and slashed the bodies in a manner that mimicked an ambush. He started with the three men he didn't know very well, the three knights he had murdered before they ever had a chance to live up to their new titles. Then he moved on to Arthur, trying desperately not to think of the young boy Leon had trained to use a sword so long ago now as he cut the young man he had become into ribbons. 

When Leon looked down on Merlin, he swallowed roughly. When they all began to fall ill, Merlin had acted as a physician alongside Gaius, but as soon as Arthur had lost consciousness, Merlin threw caution to the wind. He had tried to heal him. He tried several times before he sat back on his heels and let out a broken sob. There was nothing he could do. That didn’t stop him from trying to heal Gaius. Or Lancelot. Or Gwen. With each new failure to even alleviate the symptoms, Merlin’s face crumbled more and his health flagged further. When Merlin approached Leon, the knight had jerked away before he could touch him, afraid not of Merlin, but that he might discover that Leon wasn’t actually dying like the rest of them. But of course, Merlin didn’t know that. He was a freshly outed sorcerer approaching a knight of Camelot who backed away out of fear. There was only one conclusion Merlin could draw. Like many things about that accursed day, Merlin’s expression when Leon backed away would haunt him forever.

Leon moved on to Gaius, taking a deep breath and stabbing once before quickly moving away. Which left him with only two more choices. 

Leon shut his eyes tightly. It was too late for remorse and regret. They were gone, dead. They weren't coming back. He killed them, murdered them, and nothing he did now could hurt them anymore. Of course it could still hurt him but he should have thought about that before he killed his only friends in the world.

Leon whispered a choked apology and raised the sword above his head.

~~~

Leon picked up his own sword and taking a steadying breath, slashed himself in the arm. He clenched his eyes tight against the pain and breathed through it. It wasn’t ideal, but he couldn’t return to Camelot without a mark on him, not with the version of events he planned to tell Morgana. It would also look far more convincing and believable to the knights and people of Camelot the story he planned to tell them. He just needed Morgana to agree to it. 

As he stabbed himself shallowly in the thigh, Leon went over in his head what he would tell Morgana: First he killed Arthur then Gwen and he was about to kill Gaius when Merlin woke up and raised the alarm. He killed Gaius and Merlin swiftly and one of the wanna be knights before the other three all started fighting him at once. They got a couple of lucky shots in but they were nothing against him. Hopefully, it would be enough to pass not only Morgana’s scrutiny, but Morgause’s as well.

~~~

When Leon was "recaptured" by Morgana’s men, Leon told her "what happened." She was pleased. And luckily, when Leon proposed to tell the people of Camelot that it was the immortal men that killed Arthur and his companion and it was only barely that Leon survived, Morgana agreed. And he didn't even need to suggest that he continue to pretend to despise her because she suggested it first. After all, it would look awfully suspicious if Leon was suddenly supportive of Morgana. She could lose the support of the other knights if they believed Leon a traitor or enchanted. And that was something neither of them wanted. 

~~~

The execution of Uther Pendragon was quite the public spectacle. Citizens filled the square, crowded around the large pyre in the middle. To the side, the surviving knights of Camelot were made to watch, each restrained on either side by one of the immortal soldiers. 

When Uther was brought out to the square, the crowd went silent. How far the king had fallen. In the end, his hate was his undoing. It was fitting that it was magic that killed him. From her balcony, Morgana put an end to Uther Pendragon with a flash of gold and a blaze of fire.

Leon’s only regret that day was he could not let his satisfaction show when Uther began to scream as the flames consumed him. Could not scoff at the tyrant’s shouted pleas for mercy. Could not smirk when the screams stopped, knowing what that meant. Could not cheer with relief and joy when the flames died away to reveal a very charred and very dead Uther. No, Leon could not do any of these things because he still had a role to play. Instead of satisfaction, Leon struggled against the soldiers holding him back. Instead of scoffing, he grimaced. Instead of smirking, he stopped struggling and slumped his shoulders in defeat. Instead of cheering, his eyes were wide with horror. Leon played his role very well, just as he always did. 

The tyrant was dead, long live the queen.

Well. Not long. Not if Leon had anything to say about it. 

~~~

Leon was a patient man. He served for years under Uther, a few months under Morgana in order to find a way to take out her and Morgause was easy. All the while, he continued to play the loyal knight to Morgana behind closed doors while acting as the reluctant first knight to an usurper queen in front of his fellow remaining knights and the people of Camelot. It was a dangerous line Leon walked. One misstep and he was dead.

In the end, his patience paid off. Once he learned that those who gave blood to the cup in exchange for immortality were cursed with an existence neither truly alive nor dead and emptying the cup would end those lives, Leon came up with a plan. It was risky and tricky and definitely a bit crazy, but it was the best chance Leon had of killing the sisters without dying himself. 

Getting the blood without them noticing was far easier than he expected and he never wanted to think about how he managed it ever again. Getting the blood to the guarded cup without arousing suspicion or getting killed by a pissed off priestess or an immortal soldier? That was the difficult part. Somehow, he managed to get to the cup in one piece. And somehow, he got the blood into the cup. And somehow, he managed to knock the cup over right as Morgana and Morgause barged in, spilling all the blood onto the floor before they could stop him.

Unlike the last batch of deaths he facilitated, Leon could not bring himself to feel remorse as the immortal soldiers exploded into nothingness around him, and he felt no grief as Morgana and Morgause followed suit, not even when Morgana’s eyes, wide with hurt and betrayal, locked with his before she ceased to be.

~~~

Leon sat upon his throne, crown heavy on his head as he looked out over his people, now his subjects. With Morgana and Morgause dead and no surviving Pendragons to take the throne, the beloved first knight that rid Camelot of Morgana was the obvious choice. 

The witch was dead, long live the king.

~~~

There was a secluded clearing in the woods where eight grave markers sat in a row. Every year, on every birthday, every holiday, and on the anniversary of their deaths, Leon would visit the graves. Sometimes he would talk, sometimes he’d stay silent. Most times, he cried. Every time, he left flowers. It was such a beautiful place for a shrine to the dead.

For the three men he had barely known, Leon searched and tracked down their names until he knew them: Gwaine, Lancelot, and Percival. Their birthdays were far more elusive so Leon picked a day for each of them and returned on that day every year. For Merlin, whose birthday was also unknown, he returned to the graves on the day he first met him. 

Sometimes the visits would be brief and other times they would last for hours. No matter how long Leon stayed it was never enough. No amount of time would ever be enough to atone for what he did. No amount of time could ever undo the damage he’d cause because it was time they never got to have.

~~~

Leon was called a fair and just king. His people loved him, and he loved them. And more importantly, they loved his queen. It wasn't long after he was crowned king of Camelot that Leon opened negotiations with King Rodor of Nemeth. The lands of Gedref had been disputed for generations. Leon agreed to give a majority of them to Nemeth in exchange for Princess Mithian's hand in marriage. Leon knew it would give him a powerful ally and would give him legitimacy in the eyes of the other kings. Rodor agreed. After they were wed, Leon waited. He had already stopped enforcing the ban against magic and stopped arresting and executing sorcerers, and now he welcomed the druids back to Camelot. When enough time had passed to get the people of Camelot used to magic again without fearing it, he made public a fact that he had known since before he asked Rodor for Mithian’s hand in marriage, a fact that few outside of Nemeth knew: Queen Mithian had magic. 

"People of Camelot, for over two decades magic has been persecuted and outlawed from our kingdom. And for over two decades the citizens of this kingdom have lived in fear. That fear ends today. Magic is not evil, it does not corrupt. I know this because I have yet to meet a kinder soul than that of my wife's. Queen Mithian is the sweetest person I know and she loves this kingdom as I do," Leon announced from the balcony overlooking the square where the people of Camelot were looking up at him. Whispers broke out among the crowd as they caught his meaning. Leon reached out a hand to Mithian, who took it with a warm smile. She was nervous about the announcement but he promised her he would let no harm come to her and she trusted him. "Your queen has magic. She has magic and she has only ever used it for good, to help people. Magic is not evil, it is a tool. Just as a sword is a tool for justice and protection in the hands of a knight but a tool for menace and terror in the hands of a bandit, the nature of magic depends on how it is used. For too long all those who dared use magic as a tool for any reason were punished. No more. From now on, magic is free in Camelot. Having and using magic is no longer a crime. But just as bandits are not welcome in Camelot, neither are those that use magic for harm. Crimes committed with magic will be treated the same as every other crime of that nature, and dark magic with the intent to harm others may be punishable by death. But those who use magic peacefully have nothing to fear. I hereby repeal the ban against magic in Camelot." 

~~~

Leon sat upon his throne, his wife by his side. He had done it. He freed his people from the rule of tyranny and fear. Magic was free. Camelot was free.

But Leon was not free and he knew he never would be. There was innocent blood on his hands, blood of people who trusted him, people he called his friends. 

Leon may have Mithian but she didn't know the truth about his rise to power. If she did, she would rip herself away from him in disgust and horror and look at him as if he were a monster. Then he would be truly and utterly alone. 

Leon sat on his throne with his Queen at his side. He may be lonely but he was not alone, not as long as he had her. And as long as he had her beside him and he had the people of Camelot to take care of, Leon would not become the monster he saw in his reflection. As long as he had them and he held onto his reason for becoming king in the first place, he would not succumb to his guilt. 

Leon had blood on his hands that he could never wash clean, skeletons in his closet he could never get rid of or share with anyone, and a monster in his reflection.

~~~

Leon jolted awake with a gasp, his body drenched in cold sweat. He let out a long sigh as his surroundings filtered in and he recognized Mithian sound asleep beside him. Quietly, so to not wake her, Leon eased out of bed. He had gotten a lot of practice over the years of shaking off the nightmares without bothering her. He walked over to a basin of water and without looking, he cupped some in his palms and splashed it over his face. Leon didn't need to think very hard to remember what his dream was about. It was the same thing it was always about. Tonight it was Elyan and Gwen that had taken the central role in his nightmare. 

Gwen was struggling to breathe, her eyes wide and panicked as she held her baby brother in her arms, his head cradled in her lap with his eyes half closed and his breathing growing steadily weaker and weaker. Elyan was dying. They were both dying, but there was no question who would go first. A jolt of guilt ran through Leon and as he stood looking down at his childhood friends whom he had condemned to death, a tear rolled down his face. Gwen’s head snapped towards him, her eyes hardening with hatred and betrayal. "You. You did this. Why, Leon? Why did you do this? How could you do this?" 

Leon shook his head sadly, another tear sliding down his face. "I had to, Gwen. I'm sorry, I'm so sorry. It's for Camelot, I had to for Camelot. I had no other choice."

Gwen scoffed and narrowly avoided a coughing fit as a result. "'In life, you always have a choice. Sometimes it's easier to think that you don't,'" Gwen rasped angrily. "You chose this, Leon. You didn't have to kill us, but you did anyway. You chose this." She looked away from Leon and instead turned her gaze on Elyan, who had gone still in her arms. "Elyan? Elyan!" She shouted, shaking him to wake him. He didn't wake up. He couldn't. "No!" Gwen screamed in pure anguish.

Leon let out a shudder and splashed more water over his face to banish the lingering tendrils of the nightmare. It was only temporary. It was always just temporary. Leon was haunted by his actions in the castle of the ancient kings and the things he did that day would haunt him til the day he died. He would never be free of his guilt and he didn't deserve to be free of it. Gwen never knew it was him. If she had, she would have pushed him away when he sat down next to her with tears streaming down his face and held her as she sobbed over Elyan while dying herself. She wouldn't have clung onto his arm as if it would protect her and keep her afloat. Just as Elyan had died in her arms, Gwen had died in Leon’s. With his oldest friend dead, Leon had let himself collapse onto the floor and close his eyes, feigning severe illness himself. He had laid there listening to his victims die knowing he was responsible as Gwen grew cold beside him. Leon shook his head sharply and took a breath to steady himself. He let it out slowly, opening his eyes as he did so. His eyes found his reflections' in the still water of the basin. For just a split second, his reflection changed and the person he was seeing was not himself, but Uther Pendragon. Leon blinked tiredly and when he looked again his reflection was his own again. Leon’s hands curled into fists as he looked at his reflection. Uther Pendragon was a monster and a tyrant king. He deserved to die. Leon still believed this and never once had his conviction wavered on this stance. Uther had so much innocent blood on his hands he was drenched in it. The world was a better place without that monster in it. It troubled Leon but didn't surprise him when he caught a glimpse of the long dead king in his own reflection. After all, Leon was a monster too, with hands crimson with innocent blood, blood belonging to his friends. In many ways, Leon considered himself more of a monster than Uther ever was. For Uther Pendragon was driven by hate and anger. The murders he committed came from hatred and self righteousness. He thought his actions were justified and right. Leon was driven by love and determination. Leon murdered eight people who never did him any harm, five of whom he considered friends, when he knew doing so was wrong. They did not deserve to die, there was nothing just or right about it and Leon regretted his actions every day of his life. He hated himself for it because he knew he would do it again. He knew what he did was wrong but it was necessary to save Camelot and it's people and he would do it again if he had to. That's what made him the bigger monster.

~~~

King Leon sat on his throne, lonely, but not alone. He was a monster and that fact was unknown.

King Leon sat on his throne, lonely, but not alone. He now had children and was slowly growing old.

King Leon lay in bed, dying, frail, and old, but never alone. Leon’s eyes drifted closed and all his sins remained unknown.

[dwellordream]

“...In presenting that value-set, I also think Dhuoda provides a valuable corrective to current pop-cultural assumptions about the values and behavior of the medieval aristocracy (often considered with little concern for the variety created by the vastness of the period). In this pop-imagining, the nobility is cynical and machiavellian: they break faith regularly, are at best irreligious (and frequently actively anti-clerical), they often brutish, largely holding ‘book learning’ in contempt, and hold to strict realpolitik (‘power is power’).

We might call this the Game of Thrones aristocratic values (if it seems like I pick on Game of Thrones a lot here, it is because it is by far, above and away the most culturally impactful representation of the Middle Ages – albeit in fantasy form – in the last decade at least), but the same basic framework shows up in the nobility of The Witcher (novels, games and series) and dozens of lesser works; those sets of assumptions in turn seep into works that at least imagine themselves to be historical (particularly the crop of middling historically set medieval political dramas that emerged in Game of Thrones‘ wake, most of which, it seems, feature scheming, amoral, irreligious and often brutish aristocrats).

And of course it doesn’t come from nowhere – the grim turn in the presentation of the medieval nobility is itself a reaction against an older trend of presenting the European Middle Ages as a lost period of morality, a ‘clean’ past (think The Adventures of Robin Hood (1938) or even to an extent the Lord of the Rings (but only if one has not read the Silmarillion)). And that vision – all chivalry and little violence (a vision which is itself a terrible misunderstanding of what chivalry was and to whom it applied) – is worth reacting against. The courts of the actual Middle Ages were not inhabited by perfect, pious Sir Galahads. These were military aristocrats; they did quite a bit of fighting, much of it very nasty. In a week or two, we’ll take a closer look at some military aristocrats writing about violence (Bertran de Born and Antarah Ibn Shaddad, to be specific); their attitude is hardly pacific.

But for now, I want to focus on the contrast between Carolingian values and the Game of Thrones aristocratic package. In no small part because, quite frankly, I find the GoT aristocratic package showing up more and more in my own students and the assumptions they make about how people in the past viewed their world: that learning was devalued, that religion was viewed cynically, and that ‘power politics’ was normal and accepted (you may sense the presence of some of the underlying assumptions of the Cult of the Badass there as well – if knights were powerful fighters, mustn’t they be badasses as well? But this is an anachronism – the medieval vision of the great fighter (e.g. Roland from the Song of Roland) has precious little to do with the modern ‘badass’ action hero)

...Of course the most obvious difference is in Dhuoda’s emphasis on William keeping his vow of homage, both because such an oath was literally sacred and people in the past generally believed their own religion, but also because – as she quite clearly flags – breaking troth without justification could be well and truly dangerous in a society that functionally ran on oaths of fealty. These social dictates meant something quite important to this class.

...Another clear difference is the value placed on counsel and learning. The GoT aristocrat often attends councils but rarely take counsel meaningfully; they bark at their subordinates, belittle their ideas and generally bully them (this isn’t restricted to Game of Thrones of course; cf. both Richard and William Wallace in Braveheart for instance). But Dhuoda stresses the need to both offer good counsel and to listen to it as well. This is by no means unique to Dhuoda – cf. Einhard on Charlemagne’s temperament in court (which in turn becomes a fixture of the chansons – the old, often wise king, patiently holding court and listening carefully to his advisors; often this figure is, as in Roland, quite literally Charlemagne). An important component of the ideal lord was one who took counsel effectively, and an ideal vassal offered it eloquently and intelligently (note that Dhuoda stresses both the content of the advice but also the quality of its delivery).

And of course that was important. The advisers to high lords and kings were themselves (along with a handful of scholars and clerics) important military men. Were a king to opt, instead of listening patiently, to berate and shame his subordinates, he might well end up with a war on his hands (as, of course, Charles eventually does when he executes Bernard; while William dies in 850, his brother (also Bernard) remains a thorn in Charles’s side until the latter’s death in 877.) And in a military system where armies were composed of a retinue-of-retinues generating consensus among the major aristocrats (the men Dhuoda calls magnati) was crucial for actually winning those conflicts.

And where the GoT aristocrat is often dismissive of ‘book learning’ of any sort (GoT, in contrast to its books, quite clearly concludes that Tyrion’s book habit is a useless waste of time and he seems to be the only member of the nobility who engages in it), Dhuoda is adamant: reading is important, as are learned men at court. I honestly wonder why the nobles of Westeros continue to maintain maesters given that they never listen to them. Contrast Dhuoda’s advice: read, and collect a lot of books, she tells William. And she is demonstrating that emphasis; Dhuoda is at pains to show off her own reading and learning throughout – one imagines as a way of building credibility with her reader (her son). That performance of education is one she expects will be understood and respected by other military aristocrats.

In this, Dhuoda is not unique, but an exemplar of her historical moment, the Carolingian Renaissance, a resurgence of literacy and interest in literary culture. Einhard goes on at some length about the education Charlemagne made sure his children had (and how Charlemagne himself, starting late in life, strove to be proficient at reading and writing, but was never more the middling). Charlemagne even went to considerable lengths to assemble scholars in his court (particularly through Alcuin of York; one of these learned men recruited by him was Einhard). That emphasis that the king and his court ought to be learned continues through the later Carolingians (Dhuoda’s contemporaries) and into the High Middle Ages (the period c. 1000 to c. 1300). Whereas the Carolingian era effectively ends in the tenth century, literacy continues to widen over the following centuries; in a sense, the Carolingian Renaissance doesn’t really end.

And finally, this was a society that – rather than being cynical about their religion – was absolutely soaked through with it. Religious thinking was not limited to Church or prayer, but suffused how these fellows thought about politics and every day life. Major political decisions were made with deference to religious concerns (demonstrated most dramatically, perhaps, in the ability of a series of Popes to humble a sequence of German emperors during the investiture controversy). Secular leaders – including the aforementioned Louis the Pious most famously – poured resources into religious observance both to demonstrate piety, but also in the very real fear for their own souls. Even ruthless monarchs were often quite religiously observant (Edward I Longshanks, – the villain of Braveheart – for instance, was a very regular church-goer).

Now, does all of this mean that medieval courts were a paradise of proper conduct? Of course not. The annals of the periods feature their share of rogues and scoundrels who are accused of defying the standards of aristocratic values in one way or another. And even within the standards, there was plenty of space for violence – conflicting obligations, situations where multiple vassals felt entitled (through inheritance or promise) to the same land or title and so on. There was no shortage of potential justifications for conflict, but those justifications are typically framed with within the aristocratic code of conduct, as a product of its conflicting obligations, rather than simple, opportunistic realpolitik.

...Contrary to the popular image of a boorish and brutish group, it was an aristocracy that valued literacy and learning and placed great store in a shared code of conduct (which, again, was not a peaceful code of conduct – there were rules, but those rules involved quite a lot of violence and did almost nothing to protect most commoners) and tremendous weight on religious observance. The ideal Carolingian warrior-aristocrat was literate, pious, considered and slow to anger, taking counsel from their greater vassals, fearsome on the battlefield and fearful in the Church.”

- Bret Devereaux, “A Trip Through Dhuoda of Uzès (Carolingian Values).”

[kationella]

To Be A Sun

This is me ranting about the symbolism of the Sun Arcana characters in Persona. Ok, thanks.

As of Persona 5, our Sun characters have been Tatsuya Suou, Akinari Kamiki, Yumi Ozawa, Ayane Matsunaga, Sho Minazuki and Toranosuke Yoshida. Unlike the Justice characters, the Suns seem to be completely different characters with no similarities. At least, at first glance.

The themes of this rant will be the following:

1. Loyalty

2. Solar Eclipse

3. Center of the Solar System

4. Supernova

5. So...

Loyalty

I will begin with a trait that the Suns have in common: Loyalty; although they don't have the same brand. Whether its loyalty for a certain person or their personal ideals, the Suns will stick by them to the end of times.

Coincidentally, this also means that it will be extremely difficult to change their mind about the object of their loyalty. Stubborness is a side effect of this.

Let's review.

Tatsuya's loyalty lies with his friends, especially Maya and Jun. The latter tried to kill him and Tatsuya forgave him the same day. Not to mention that Tatsuya stubbornly clinged at the memory of his friends even though it meant the possible destruction of Earth.

Though we meet Akinari near the end of his life, we get a glimpse of his loyalty to the protagonist in the way he was always waiting for him each Sunday afternoon and how he strived to say goodbye to the protag even after his death.

Yumi's loyalty is towards her mother, getting angry at her father on her behalf and forsaking her role in the school play to help her.

Ayane is an example of the other type of loyalty; the one dedicated to their ideals and beliefs. Even though she develops it late in her Social Link, she learns to stick by what she wants for herself.

Meanwhile, Sho and Minazuki are devoted to one another. The entire plot of P4AU is them trying to be alone together.

Old Man Tora shows the two types of loyalty. The first one towards his firm ideals and the other one towards the people he means to serve. This is what makes him the only politician I believe in.

A Sun Arcana is one of the best friends you could ever get. The ride or die type of friend. The problem with this is that, in their effort to stick by their object of loyalty, they forget to take care of themselves. It would be extremely dangerous for them to align their loyalty with a toxic person or dangerous belief. More on this later.

The Suns need to find their inner source of happiness so they can properly shine. Something no outside force can take away. And talking about external threats...

Solar Eclipse

The Suns already start with a distinct shine of their own. Something they were born with. However, when we met them there is always one external influence that blocks their sunlight.

And so, we have the Solar Eclipse effect, where a character from the Sun Arcana feels inadequate due to factors outside their control, not realizing they are perfect the way they are.

It's common for a Sun to have a certain individual related to those problems who serves as their blocker.

Whether it's some dimensional game you're a piece of (Nyarlathotep and Philemon), your parents' dispute (Yumi's father), a lost opportunity to show your worth (Original Trombone Player), experiments made on you (Ikutsuki) or a scandal you were wrongly accused of (Kuromoto).

The only one without a certain person would be Akinari, but to be fair it's hard to blame someone else for a genetic terminal illness. Ironically, his last days were spent talking with someone who had a piece of Death inside him. Who knows. Maybe if Akinari had known that Minato was related to Death itself...

Especially if we consider that almost all of the Suns had an amiable relationship with their blocker at one point or another.

Philemon was Tatsuya's guide through his journey.

Yumi felt gratitude towards her father for bringing her to the world.

Ayane did return the trombone solo to the original player.

Ikutsuki was the closest thing Sho had to a father figure.

Kuromoto was Yoshida's old mentor.

Once that blocker moved on with their fate, the Suns started to shine again. And what to do now that the heavens are their own again?

Center of the Solar System

The most basic fact about the Sun (besides the fact that it's hot) it's that it is the center of the Solar System. Every other planet rotates around them. The Sun stays firm, with a shinning light for the rest of the system.

In the same way as that, the Sun Arcana characters have the potential of becoming leaders and the protagonists of their own stories, setting an example for the rest of their acquaintances.

Tatsuya is the most obvious example. He is the main protagonist of his own game. Nothing to say that isn't already known.

Akinari writes a storybook that would become the inspiration of a new generation of children, if Nanako's love for it is anything to go by.

The whole point of theatre is to lead the audience through a story and create emotions in them through a character. Something Yumi excels at.

Ayane's Social Link is about being more selfish and grasping the opportunities presented to her.

Yoshida is the most literal example, being a politician and all.

Sho still has to find that *something* that will end up making him an example to others but he is on the way.

A fully developed Sun will be able to be a charismatic leader, who earns the loyalty of their team through kindness and generosity. Sunlight is meant to help others see the world around them, in the same way Suns will help others see their potential and own inspiration. You just can't take your eyes off them since you literally gravitate towards them.

This is the main point that separates a Sun from a Star. Those with the Star Arcana need to learn they can shine brightly for themselves, while the Suns learn that they can shine for others as well. They all start with low self-esteem, but their pride will keep developing as time goes on.

Suns have a natural talent for initiative. Through their stories we helped them realize their own potential but now its up to them to do the rest.

Supernova

As we all know, fire needs fuel to burn, but what happens when you allow your inner fire to burn you from the inside out and leave nothing behind?

You get the case of King Leo, the Reverse Sun.

So far we have only one Reverse Sun character but we can determine a lot from him. Basically, Reverse Arcanas are the "corrupt" version of their original personalities, so what happens when a Sun becomes corrupted? Well...

See, King Leo or Sudou fits all the criteria that defines a Sun.

He is extremely loyal to both Kashihara and Joker. However, this loyalty only brought him misery when both abandoned him. Sudou poured so much in them that when they disappeared, he had nothing left.

Sudou thought his Solar Eclipse was caused by Tatsuya and Maya, when in reality it came to be thanks to Nyarlathotep and his father. A life of hallucinations and misery caused by these two.

Sudou's position as an executive in the Masked Circle shows his leadership aptitude and potential to become the center of his own system.

Sudou spent so much time eclipsed that, in his desire to shine as bright as he could to break free, he ended up burning everything in his path. He literally exploded in a fiery rage and collapsed.

At that point it became mercy for Tatsuya to kill him.

His is a sad case, especially when comparing him to the other Suns and realizing his lost potential.

A similar case outside of Persona where the "Inner Fire Burns All" applies would be Azula from Avatar. Now that I think about it, she would make a good Reverse Sun Arcana... hmm.

So...

The Sun Arcana is such an interesting card. By all accounts, it symbolizes happiness and joy. A common mistake is to think these are given. No, a true Sun Arcana *fights* to achieve that happy ending. Once they reach it, their victory will be the sweetest of all.

Celestial Arcanas in general have the tendency to be a guiding light to everyone else (although some of them do it unintentionally).

There is also the matter of the writing parallels between the Suns and their Moon counterparts, but that is a theme for another time.

And now you'll ask me: "Kationella, what was the point of this analysis?"

Well, it all comes down to one question that has been plaguing me for days:

Would it be ironic for Suns to wear sunglasses?

[theonceoverthinker]

Signs Clover Might Come Back

So if you’ve been reading this little blog for any amount of time since the end of the last year, you’d know I’ve had RWBY, Fair Game, and Clover Ebi on the brain. And if you’d been reading it for any amount of time since late January, then you’d know that both I and a lot of other people really, really, really hated the ultimate handling of each of those things following the release of 7X12.

But I’m not here to go off about that episode today (Though I still have PLENTY more to say on that front).

No, I’m here to look forward towards the upcoming volume with something a bit more optimistic (Given some of those quotes from the 7X12 commentary that have recently come to light and the possibility of a V8 trailer tomorrow, we could all use that right about now).

Volume 8 is about a month away, and with it, a large amount of the Fair Game/Clover Ebi community as well as myself are hoping Clover will be resurrected as a result of something we call the Staff of Creation Theory. 

Look, I probably don’t have to explain this to anyone reading this post, but just in case, the tldr of the theory is that the Staff of Creation will cease holding Atlas up and since it’s able to create, it just might be able to bring back the deceased as a form of recreation (I.E. Clover). I’ve made a theory or two about how it could work in the context of straight up execution, but again, that’s not what I’m here to talk about.

So -- incredibly long intro aside -- what AM I here to talk about?

Well, as the title states I want to talk about the signs that we can look for in V8 prior to any resurrection that can reasonably suggest that Clover might come back.

My overall thoughts on whether Clover will actually come back or not basically come down to a coin flip at this point. Trace amounts of evidence both in some of the animation from V7 and implications of comments heard here and there give off a real sense that he just might be revived after all, but then again, the writers have done little lately to inspire a lot of faith in me, and a large amount of my distrust with RT is that we had a lot more to go on that 7X12 wasn’t going to be...well, 7X12 before 7X12 was 7X12.

(Jenna, come on, you said you weren’t going to rant about it...)

MOVING ON!

Anyway, I compiled a brief list of realistic ideas that could happen in the context of Volume 8 (And its marketing, merch, etc.) before the theoretical resurrection as a means of foreshadowing it, as well as a brief explanation as to my reasonings for believing them to be meaningful and possible executions they could take in their implementations. Anything is on the table here, so now that this incredibly long intro that somehow got even longer is done, let’s get going!

List under the cut!

1. Clover appearing ANYWHERE in the V8 intro. Simply put, dead people tend to not show up in the RWBY intros following their passing. Maybe their graves will show up, as they have with Summer, but that’s about it. But even outside of that trend, Clover appearing in Volume 8′s intro would put some nice power in the theory’s corner. I don’t even think he necessarily has to be in it himself (though I absolutely want him to). Giving any amount of significant screen time to the pin would (while not as good for us as actually showing off Clover himself) still be a point in our favor of Clover’s importance to the characters. I could see this happening in two ways. First, if it’s not Clover appearing, but the pin, we could have Qrow looking at or wearing the pin and then the camera doing a closeup of it (Hopefully without the blood). Second, if it IS Clover appearing (And if he does appear in the intro, I’d say his chances of returning will be up significantly since they’re bothering to animate not just the pin, but Clover’s face/entire body), Clover could be dragged away from Qrow in sort of an abstract nightmare-ish thing akin to the visual of Qrow drinking in V6 directly. In both cases, they’d be followed by a transition to something relevant to his resurrection would be the real money ticket.

Transitions...

Now, the specifics of this as it pertains to Clover will be explained in the next point, but what you need to know right now is that transitions are incredibly important. Simply put, the sequences of events, especially as they exist in and pertain to large ensemble casts like the one we have in RWBY because so many things are happening simultaneously, are important. They have the ability to convey narrative insights; story beats can be glimpsed off of them and themes can be established or deconstructed by the order of plot and story points. 

What are those things that it would be really good to transition to after mentioning/showing Clover/Clover’s pin?

I am SO glad you asked, because I’m about to get to it!

2. Any mention of the sentiment of “dead is dead” in the context of Clover’s death followed by a transition to something that calls that very idea into question. Here we go. 

I’m of the mindset that we could be witnessing some very nice foreshadowing of a Clover revival if during a mention of Clover, something that’s said by someone (Qrow, Ironwood, Robyn, the Ace Ops) that’s akin to “there’s no way he can come back” or “dead is dead” is IMMEDIATELY followed by one the following things: The Staff of Creation itself or just the door to the staff’s vault, Penny or Ozpin (Formerly dead characters now resurrected, Penny being the current Winter Maiden and the only one able to access the staff) doing pretty much anything, or the base of the floating city and the blue magic under it. ANY of these things (And probably one or two others because I’m only one man here) carry with them a heaping helping of foreshadowing, the universe itself telling us not to count our chickens before they hatch. I can see this happening via a hard cut or a fade between the character mentioning Clover (Or Clover’s pin) and the aforementioned element.

The reason why I place such emphasis on these transitions is because without them, bringing up Clover or Clover’s mortality (or present lack thereof) only has a narrative function of quelling any hopes of him being revived, a proverbial twisting of the knife, if you will.

3. ”No hetero”-ing the Jailbirds ship/separating them as quickly as possible. A worrying point for many of us has been the possibility that with Clover absent and killed off in a way that seemingly showed that Clover and Qrow were too opposite each other to make it work, that Qrow and Robyn (Now off to prison together) could possibly become a thing. I think doing something to ensure audiences right off the bat that that’s not a concern anyone needs to have will do a little something to show that RT at least listened to the clear dislike the ship received from the get go (No offense intended if you do ship it, but it is what it is and both components of Jailbirds are shipped far more with other characters, and for good reason). Moreover, getting rid of the chance of Jailbirds off the bat might show that Qrow’s romantic future is still up in the air, possibly for a revived Clover to come back and be a part of. This can be done in a number of ways -- canonizing Springthyme, getting Robyn and Qrow out of jail and separated ASAP, canonizing Qrow’s romantic love for Clover, etc. The quicker this is done, the more I’d be willing to believe we could see Clover’s return.

4. Not just Marrow being shown contemplating deflecting from Ironwood. This one’s a little hard to explain, so follow me.

Prior to Clover’s death, Neath Oum made a Tweet that pointed out how odd it was that there were five Ace Ops in a world geared towards the number four (Four people on a team, Maidens, relics, kingdoms, etc). If this sentiment is to remain true with a Clover revival, something’s got to give to even out the inherently weird setup of the Ace Ops’ odd number (Pun intended). 

Look, if Clover’s coming back, then they’re not gonna make him a villain because it wouldn't make sense (Even with the garbage logic of 7X12). So that means that they have to make a big change regarding either just Clover or all of the other Ace Ops.

This can happen a number of ways. Clover can come back and take the place of the (possibly) deceased Summer Rose on STRQ (Best case scenario imho because it leaves the Ace Ops open to a redemption), another Ace Op can die (I REALLY don’t want it to be this), or Clover can back and deflects...but not alone, and that last point is the only one with real potential foreshadowing from the Ace Ops. 

Obviously, Marrow’s the one Ace Op everyone thinks will turn against Ironwood, especially with the reveal of Clover’s death to the Ace Ops now an inevitability. He’s going to have a reaction to that, and probably the biggest of his team’s. However, here’s the thing: If just Marrow deflects, that makes one member by himself (Or two if Clover comes back and joins with him) and a team of three. That absolutely doesn’t work with that sentiment of four being the central number of the show, either (Unless even more characters are thrown into the mix and...no...just no…). So if Marrow leaves the Ace Ops, I don’t think it will be alone.

Once again, there’s a couple of ways this could go. One of the remaining could be actually villainized to make space for Clover back on the main team (Harriet would be my most likely prediction because of that exchange she and Marrow had about killing team RWBY), or (ideally) all of them could deflect and create a hybrid of my first and third idea: Clover goes off to join Qrow, Raven, and Tai while Marrow, Elm, Harriet, and Vine stay as the Ace Ops (Maybe under a new team name).

The signs to look out for of this happening are bigger reactions from the non-Marrow Ace Ops than they’ve shown in the series up to this point (With the exception of 7X12), the Ace Ops mourning together and even growing closer during that mourning, or statements of doubt from the rest of the team regarding Ironwood’s plan or just Ironwood’s leadership as well.

5. Any marketing regarding Qrow mourning Clover. Why market a setup to something that doesn’t have a payoff? If Clover’s as unimportant as he was claimed to be, then showing Qrow mourn wouldn’t have a point, after all, right? So why do it? Perhaps because there’s something on its way. I’m just saying, if you see the official RWBY Twitter make a post of Qrow forlornly looking at Clover’s pin or putting on the pin, or a tweet that quotes the kind of “dead is dead” line I mentioned back in point 2, there might be more to it than the surface might have us believe. I’m not telling you to expect anything because as I said, my hope is not especially high right now either, but I will say that that could be a real sign.

6. Ace Ops merchandise with all five of them. A few months ago, a shirt of all five of the Ace Ops popped up on the RT shop. This set off an alarm bell or two in my head because why sell a shirt of a team that ended the previous volume with one member dead and the other four of them cast off to the side as basically secondary villains? I know people like the Ace Ops, but it was still a really weird merch choice. It was especially jarring because in that same wave of merch, the team ORNJ shirt was revealed, and that was effectively a spoiler since that team hadn’t officially formed yet (Just implied, but other teams like RNJR were given their team name on screen). However, I acknowledge that that could all just be a fluke. BUT, if we see more of this kind of thing during V8...you never know, right? 

7. Tyrian bringing up Clover a LOT. I can’t fully explain this one, but while Tyrian seemed to realize Clover’s importance to Qrow, him bragging about it a lot prior to or during his and Qrow’s inevitable next showdown would be a really solid potential mark in the Clover comes back column (If he’s not already back by the time this happens, of course).

So there you go -- a few signs that might be present if we really are going to get Clover back. Maybe getting all of these ideas together is just a means of working out my senses of hope and doubt as V8 grows closer -- it absolutely is (Especially after reading some of those commentary quotes -- YIKES). Maybe this will help someone who feels the same way I do cope as well. Whatever this was, I hope it makes things easier.