#and yet they still feel conflicted because of the sacrifice that their people made to reach this far

[little-lanterns]

want to read more babel but i am still recovering from canto vi fuck...

[ja3yun]

Royal Sacrifice | S.JY | pt.2

prince!jake x maid!fem reader warnings: tiny bit of fluff, angst, smut (mdni), unprotected sex, cream pie, fingering, nipple play, whiney jake, my attempt to write posh-ish (again), longing, not proofread, anything else lmk! wc: 12.5k synopsis: with prince jaeyun set to marry another woman, revelations of the true plans behind the marriage come to light which leave you struck with conflicting emotions and lead to an outcome you could never have anticipated. part one a/n: hi! it is me once again. this was heavily requested to have a part 2 so i am being ever so kind and giving it to you all! i held a poll to see if you guys wanted a long chapter or shorter and long won so ofc its 12k (sigh) anyway, please enjoy it! this was really fun to write even though it's not my usual style, i hope this ending serves you better than part one did hehe.

3 months. It has been 3 months since you last saw the prince, the love of your life. Ever since the king made his speech declaring the marriage of Prince Jaeyun and Princess Mia, your heart has not stopped shedding pieces of itself. With each part that breaks away, you hope they reach him somehow.

Currently, he is in Lethamhill, fulfilling a tour of the Kingdom that will best help him serve the country once the merger is to happen. You haven’t ventured past the walls of Glengyre, so as you imagine him exploring and getting to know the people, being his charming self, you can only imagine the backdrop to be similar to your home, hopefully with a little more prosperity. 

It has been hard to focus on your duties while your brain is occupied with a forbidden love, a love that can never be. Of course, you told him to do this, practically pushing him into the new role of a husband to a woman who is not you, yet, you don’t find any comfort in knowing you both did the right thing. 

He was willing to fight in the front line, to disregard any idea of marrying another, all for the sake of you and your love. It is a love that comes once in a lifetime and it is a love that has the power to destroy worlds. You could not sit back and in your right mind watch the Prince throw away his people for you, it’s unethical and illogical, thus, you had no choice but to push him away.

But you still loved him all the same, that fire of affection will always burn for him.

Despite your longing, his absence has made it somewhat easier to grasp the idea that you can no longer hold him or feel his warmth through your veins. Being in the same room as him will only hurt you more.

He has to come back at some point, and that point is any day now.

Princess Mia must also do her rounds throughout Glengyre if she is to be a Princess of this kingdom as well as her own. You aren’t one to gossip but the chatter around the servant's quarters is that she is spoiled and entitled, everything Jaeyun despises. There might not be any truth to it, senseless rumours about her attitude could easily be spread in response to some jealous people looking for an excuse to hate her all because Jaeyun is off limits now. 

It didn’t matter, true or not, they were to be wed in a matter of months regardless of personal feelings. 

As you dust off the ornaments lined up neatly on the mantlepiece in the hallway, you hear the main entrance doors open, a commotion following. You peer around the corner to catch a glimpse, curious as to who graces the castle at this early hour. 

Then you see Princess Mia with her arm hooked onto Jaeyun, smiling up at him with doe eyes.

That was another truth you did not want to face once he returned; that he could, in fact, have fallen in love with her.

“My boy! How was your trip?” The king’s ambitious voice echoes through the entire castle.

Jaeyun smiles gracefully, bowing as he approaches his father, “It went well, Your Majesty,” he says at a far lesser decibel than his father.

Princess Mia looks at Jaeyun like he is the only man in the world which only serves to make your stomach twist. It is so obvious this would happen, Jaeyun is so easy to fall in love with, anyone would be foolish to spend more than a few hours with him and fail to be enamoured by him. 

You almost knock over the clock you are pretending to dust as your eyes stay glued to the scene before you. Your brain is trying to determine Jaeyun’s feelings towards his fiance, are the feelings of adoration mutual or does he still see this as a contractual marriage? 

Does he still love you?

"Y/N, back to work, please. We do not eavesdrop on the Royals," Miss Son chides in a hushed tone, jolting you back to attention.

You bow apologetically, hastening your dusting with a newfound fervour, cheeks burning with embarrassment under Miss Son's pointed gaze. She says no more, retreating to attend to her own duties and leaving you to yours.

As you resume your task, the distant murmur of voices from the royals serves as a constant reminder of his presence despite the fact he is no longer in your line of sight. Jaeyun’s voice threads through the air like a siren’s song, beckoning you to his side once more.

But you cannot answer.

_____

As you diligently scrub the remnants of the Royal's lunch from the plates, the imposing figure of the Chamberlain disrupts the tranquillity of the kitchen, her presence commanding attention as she raps sharply on the wooden table.

“Y/N?” she asks quizzically as she does not know who the name would belong to. 

It’s tiny situations like this that make you miss Jaeyun even more. The Crown Prince's effortless familiarity with over a hundred staff members stands in stark contrast, a testament to his respect and appreciation for every individual, regardless of their status.

Turning to face the Chamberlain, you offer a respectful bow, "Yes, Ma'am?"

"Ah, excellent. Please cease your current tasks and accompany me. Your presence has been requested," she instructs, her tone brooking no argument.

Your heart skips a beat, thoughts racing as you wonder what could possibly warrant such a summons. Swallowing your apprehension, you quickly set aside the plates and follow the Chamberlain, your footsteps echoing faintly in the corridor as you trail behind her.

The corridors of the castle seem to stretch endlessly, each step accompanied by a mounting sense of anticipation. You steal a glance at the Chamberlain's stoic profile, but her expression reveals nothing, leaving you to speculate about why you have been called.

Maybe the King and Queen finally discovered your clandestine relationship with the Prince, perhaps this is the moment all of your past rendezvous catch up to you. What would this mean? Would they behead you, exile you from the very kingdom you call home, or was it something much more sinister?

Finally, you arrive at a grand door, adorned with intricate carvings and gilded accents. The Chamberlain pauses, turning to regard you with a stern gaze, "Remember your place," she warns, before pushing open the door and ushering you inside.

As you walk into the large dining hall, you see an abundance of eyes on you. The entire Royal family, along with their trusted valets have their attention on you.

You scour the table for Jaeyun, whose eyes glisten with longing and disbelief. He cannot believe you are standing in front of him once again, albeit in different circumstances than he would like. 

To him, you look as pretty as the day he was escorted away to Lethamhill, but he can sense that you haven’t been well; your tired eyes and slumped body are a testament. He could only wish to ease the pain from your body just as his soft hands used to do.

“Miss Y/N, is it?” the Queen inquires, eyeing you up and down.

With a nod, you avoid direct eye contact, “Yes, Your Majesty. Y/N L/N,” your hands tremble slightly as you speak, seeking stability by clutching your skirt, attempting to rid the clamminess that has settled upon them.

The King rises from his seat, intrigued by your surname and background, “L/N… Is that the same L/N who oversees the mill near the Dochart River?” he probes.

Regrettably, you must correct him, “No, Your Majesty. My father toils in the mines, and my mother gathers berries,” a tinge of shame colours your words as you recount your family's humble occupations.

Both your parents worked tirelessly to provide for your family, yet their efforts often fell short. When they left you with your siblings, it wasn't out of neglect but out of necessity, seeking better opportunities in other regions where wealth flowed more readily - a circumstance not dissimilar to yours right now.

The room falls into a weighted silence, the King's brows knit together in thought. “Ah, I see,” he murmurs, clearly disinterested in you now.

You brace yourself for judgment, but to your surprise, Princess Mia speaks up, a soft smile on her face,  “Hardworking stock, it is admirable,” she remarks with no hint of sarcasm, her tone warm.

A glimmer of pride graces your features at her acknowledgement, a brief respite from the anxiety flickering around your insides. You still don’t know why you are here, so you cannot let your guard down so easily.

"Miss L/N, may I introduce Princess Mia of Lethamhill. I trust you are familiar with her impending union with the Prince?" the Queen's gaze steers you towards the Princess, who maintains a gracious smile.

"Yes, Your Majesty. It is indeed an honour to be in your presence," you reply with a respectful curtsy, offering a warm smile in return.

She makes her way to you, holding out her hands to offer to you. Your eyes scan the table to see the look of shock on everyone’s faces, taken aback by her forwardness to a mere peasant, “It is my honour to meet you, Y/N,” her face exudes a kindness you see similarly in Jaeyun.

It breaks your heart.

They are clearly well suited, their characters and status mould together in ways you and Jaeyun could never.

“Y/N, you will serve as Princess Mia’s lady-in-waiting during her stay in Glengyre,” the Queen's announcement leaves you speechless, a wave of disbelief washing over you.

Typically, when Royals of other kingdoms venture to another, it is customary that they bring their own staff, particularly their maid of honour. 

Princess Mia's unexpected warmth catches you off guard as she expresses her hope for a harmonious relationship, “Pince Jaeyun spoke highly of you, Y/N. I look forward to our time together," she says, grasping your hands with genuine affection.

Confusion and resentment swirl within you. Was this Jaeyun's way of taunting you? To rub it in that you are no longer his?

Despite your inner thoughta, you maintain your composure and offer a gracious smile in return. "Thank you, Princess Mia. I am at your service," you respond, masking your apprehension with a polite demeanour.

As you glance around the room, you catch Jaeyun's eye for a brief moment, his expression one of mischief, “Thank you, Y/N. You know all the ins and outs of this castle,” he smirks, eluding to your secret nightly meetings in whatever nook and cranny you could find to be with him.

With a mixture of confusion and trepidation, you acknowledge his words with a subtle nod, unsure of what his intentions are at this moment. Despite the lingering doubts and uncertainties, you steel yourself to fulfil your duties to the best of your abilities.

“I appreciate the opportunity, Your Highness,” you say to Jaeyun, hoping he can read your confused features. Luckily after months of only being able to communicate through your expressions, he shakes his head, understanding your worries but dismissing them.

He just wants to keep you close, and if serving his future wife is the only way to do that, then so be it.

_____

The following morning marks the beginning of your role as a lady-in-waiting, a position typically earned after years of loyal service—a fact not lost on the resentful gazes of your fellow servants at the dining table. Even your chamber companions shun you, refusing to share the bunk, a clear display of their disdain. Although Princess Mia kindly offers you a separate bed closer to her quarters, accepting would only stoke the flames of their animosity.

As you walk the hallways adorned in your new uniform, a sense of pride swells within you. The sea blue cotton dress may lack the opulence of the Chamberlain's or any other higher ranking servant’s attire, but its significance is not lost on you. It represents a step up from your previous maid garments, a symbol of newfound status and responsibility.

The guards at the door inspect you and your new look, both smiling widely before stepping out of the way to give you a pathway to the Princess’ door. 

Tipping your head courteously, you knock on the grand oak doors, awaiting approval to enter. However, when it does not come, you open them slightly, examining the room to find your lady. A lump is formed under the covers of the bed, meaning she could only be in one place.

You gently shut the double doors behind you before carefully gliding over to the window to open the curtains.

Back home, your brothers had a tendency to do as the Princess is doing just now - hiding to avoid going about their duties. You expect it from teenage boys, not from the Princess of an entire kingdom.

“Princess Mia, you have an appointment this morning,” you say firmly, hoping she will wake up.

A muffled groan escapes beneath the layers of quilts covering her head, "Please, Y/N, I have a dreadful allergy to the sun," she jokes.

With a gentle tug, you draw back the final curtain, "My apologies, Your Highness, but I am under strict orders from the King to ensure you join them for breakfast," you explain with a warm smile.

She shifts beneath the covers before casting them aside, revealing her upper half with a resigned sigh, "I understand, Y/N. It is not your doing," she concedes, stretching as if aiming for the heavens, "But you should know, I harbour a great distaste for mornings. If I seem irritable, it’s hardly your fault."

You can't help but admire her even in her morning disarray, her features possessing an otherworldly allure. Though the kingdom boasts many beauties, encountering someone of her stature feels like a rare privilege.

Blinking away the remnants of sleep, she finally meets your gaze with a warm smile, her eyes sparkling with a hint of mischief. "Shall we, Y/N?" she says, gracefully swinging her legs off the bed and rising to her feet with a fluid motion that speaks of innate poise.

“Would you like me to assist you with your bath or would you prefer some privacy?” you query, making her bed as she glances out the window.

Princess Mia is like any one of your friends back home, an ease of friendliness passes between you the more you speak. There's a pang of wishful thinking, a part of you hoped she'd embody the snobbishness rumoured about her, offering an easy target for animosity towards her relationship with your former love. But she is far removed from her rumours.

“Neither,” she begins to pull you away from your task of making the bed and pushes you towards the bathroom, “Perhaps I could use the company more than anything.”

Turning the taps to fill her bath, you steal another glance at her as she strips off her nightgown, marvelling at her delicate features: the velvety smoothness of her skin, the graceful curves that seem sculpted by an artist's hand, and the perkiness of her ass, reminiscent of a ripe peach. 

In contrast, your own reflection reveals a different story - dry skin marked by scars from old scabies, a dullness that overshadows any hint of radiance, and a figure that pales in comparison, lacking the perfection of hers.

You would be foolish to think for a second you could compete with her for Jaeyun’s love.

As she steps into the running bath, you prepare the soap, handing it to her which she accepts with a smile. 

“How long have you worked for the Glengyre royal family?” she asks, lathering up the soap and washing it over her body.

"Just under a year, Your Highness," you respond, realising in this moment that you have been here for much longer than desired. Being away from your brothers for this long was never part of the plan, and the ache to see them again gnaws at your heart, the letters exchanged barely enough to quell your longing.

Princess Mia lounges in the bath, leaning her chin on the edge as she speaks with you, “Tell me honestly, from a peasant perspective, are they good people?” 

The question is a hefty one, one that you are not prepared for. It is no secret that you have a distaste for the King and Queen, however, your judgement upon them can only lead to your travesty, so you ponder how to navigate the question while still maintaining some honesty.

“Well, the King and Queen try their best,” you begin, eyes pointed downward, “And the Prince…”

How would one describe Prince Jaeyun? Loyal, honest, kindhearted, fearless, a true King. But how do you say it while hiding your feelings for him? Your brain wants to tell the Princess how Jaeyun kisses with such desire and passion, and his whispers of affection and adoration serve you to believe he is straight from one of Shakespeare's sonnets. He was much more than a noble Crown Prince, he was the love of your life, and you wanted to scream it from the rooftops.

She pokes you gently with a finger, drawing you back from your reverie, "Y/N?"

"Oh, my apologies," you offer a strained smile, hoping she didn’t catch on to your longing gaze, "Prince Jaeyun is undoubtedly a man of great virtue and integrity, worthy to ascend the throne and lead his people," you reply, striving for a diplomatic tone that hides the depth of your affection for him.

"And how will he be as a husband?"

You fluster, your brain now inappropriately recalling his touches and lingering lips while his bride-to-be is a mere foot away, “I couldn’t possibly comment on that, Your Highness,” you deflect, inwardly cursing your traitorous thoughts.

“But from your perception, someone of your lower class has no reason to lie to me regarding your Prince, I would value your honesty,” she insists, playing with the water that envelopes her.

Sighing, you yield, “He will make a fantastic husband. His loyalty to those he loves knows no bounds,” you concede, swallowing the bitter pill of truth as you reluctantly paint a portrait of Jaeyun as a desirable suitor, knowing it may only serve to bring them closer together.

The Princess slips lower into the bathtub, leaving just her head above the water, "He does not love me, though," she acknowledges, her voice heavy with sorrow as if she were voicing the truth for the first time, "He made it clear that his heart belongs elsewhere, that he could never give it to me."

You feel a surge of tension at her words, a glimmer of hope blossoming in your heart at Jaeyun's implied feelings. It's a bittersweet realisation, knowing that he still holds love for you as deeply as you do for him, yet, not one of you can do anything about it.

Standing from the stool beside the bathtub, you pick up a towel and hold it out for the Princess to take, but she does not move, instead, she continues her questioning, “Who does he love, Y/N?”

The sickness that sits in your stomach bubbles to your throat, word vomit willing you on to scream at her that it is you he belongs to, that his heart is yours and yours is his. But you dare not utter such a confession.

“He loves his people, Your Highness, they are who have his heart,” you stand strong, pushing the towel further in her face, using it as a barricade so she cannot witness your wet eyes.

Princess Mia removes herself from the tub, idly lost in her thoughts, “We have that in common,” her tone airy as she remembers her people back home.

She is a good person, her thoughtfulness and kindness showcase this, and you know she will make a fantastic addition to Jaeyun’s faction. With her as his wife, they will do great things for Glengyre.

_____

As the first rays of dawn break through the stained glass windows of the castle, you find yourself standing alongside Princess Mia at the grand breakfast table, the delicate clinking of silverware and murmured conversations filling the air. Your gaze couldn't help but flicker nervously toward the entrance, anticipation mounting with each passing moment as you awaited Jaeyun's arrival.

It is hard to be so close yet so out of reach to someone you used to be tangled with.

Prince Jaeyun and his trusted valet, Heeseung, make their grand entrance into the opulent dining hall, instantly commanding the attention of all present. His piercing gaze sweeps across the room, briefly meeting Princess Mia's eyes before seeking out your own.

You have lined yourself up with the other maids, a habit from your past role. Heeseung approaches you with a warm smile, his voice carrying a hint of understanding as he addresses you, "Miss Y/N, valets typically stand to the left," he gently reminds you, gesturing for you to join him. Grateful for Heeseung's kindness and guidance, you offer him a respectful bow before obediently following his lead.

As you traverse the room, keeping your head low in deference, you feel a soft touch against your hand, sending a jolt of electricity coursing through your veins. You didn’t need to look up to know who it was, the touch sending sparks to your heart. 

Jaeyun is playing with fire, he knows it’s risky to even gaze upon you too long, yet his heart yearns for you and your touch, causing him to act irrationally. Your heart is a magnet and it is drawing him in the closer you are to him.

In a brief moment of recklessness, Jaeyun slips a folded piece of paper into your palm before releasing his grip, the covert exchange going unnoticed by everyone save the two of you. Quickly you tuck the piece of paper up your sleeve and stand in your designated space.

As the Royals take their seats, anticipation pervades the air, with the tantalising smells of the lavish meal enticing even the most controlled appetites.

“How fares the Princess this morning?” Heeseung inquires softly, a faint smile gracing his lips as he casts his gaze ahead.

“Quite well. And what of the Prince?” you respond, hoping for a glimpse into your former lover’s wellbeing.

Heeseung's sigh is filled with gravity, his words hint at a heavy burden borne by the Prince, "Disheartened, I'm afraid," he says quietly.

The confession elicits a sharp intake of breath from you, brows knit together in confusion as you silently implore Heeseung to elaborate. "I believe it's due to the wedding being expedited to this Friday," he declares, his words sinking in with unexpected weight.

“What?!” your exclamation escapes your lips before you can temper it, a mix of shock and disbelief colouring your tone, reverberating through the room with an unintended volume.

Jaeyun, catching wind of your distressed reaction, turns his gaze towards you, his expression a mixture of concern and curiosity. Sensing his eyes upon you, you quickly avert your gaze, feeling a flush of embarrassment creeping up your neck.

You know you cannot be with him but you presumed you had more time to become accustomed to Princess Mia around the castle and before you lose him forever, “Isn’t the Princess required to occupy Glengyre for at least 3 months? Isn’t it customary for her to know our land and the people before she takes such a vow?” you question. 

“Apparently, she does not need 3 months. The arrangement has altered slightly,” he looks down at you. 

“How can that be?” You don’t mean to bombard the valet with your senseless questioning, but nothing makes sense to you, “How will she know what is best for this kingdom if she does not actively know it? How will she best know how to take the role of Princess of Glengyre?”

Heeseung breathes out, “She won’t be, Prince Jaeyun is to be crowned King Consort of Lethamhill once they marry and fulfil his duties there,” his tone is filled with sorrow. 

You're taken aback by Heeseung's revelation, the pieces of the puzzle slowly falling into place, "But if Jaeyun becomes the King Consort of Lethamhill, what about Glengyre?" you inquire, your voice barely above a whisper, as if afraid to speak the words aloud, “Who will take the place of the King once he passes?”

“It is blasphemy to speak about the King’s death so frivolously!” Heeseung exclaims in a hushed tone, his jaw clenched. Heeseung was a royal guard before he was Jaeyun’s man-in-waiting, the blood of the royal navy still runs rampant through his veins, his honour to the king noble even if slightly blinded.

You offer an apology, bowing your head and feigning shame, “Sorry, I shall never utter the words so haphazardly again.”

He nods, stature returning to his elegant stance, "It's a complicated matter," Heeseung replies, his tone laced with sympathy, "The merger between the kingdoms is more than it seems. Lethamhill is in dire need of assistance after the turmoil caused by the war. The arrangement serves to benefit both kingdoms but it is Glengyre who is set to prosper.”  

You are not understanding Heeseung’s words, which only causes hindrance in this conversation, “Excuse my ignorance, but I do not understand.”

“Lethamhill is on the brink of destruction, the King believes if Prince Jaeyun were to be crowned King Consort, he would be able to fully take Lethamhill for himself. King James and Queen Elizabeth will resign their titles for their daughter as part of the deal, leaving our Crown Prince in charge with only the need of convincing Princess Mia to follow his plans.”

You whip your head to face Heeseung, “So Lethamhill is to be no more? What of its people?” your heart races at the thought of thousands of innocent lives tangled in this game of political power.

“They are not the King and Prince’s concern, they serve Glengyre and Glegyre alone,” he says quietly.

There is a weight in your chest akin to an anchor, bringing your remaining hope and happiness for this merger down into the pits of your stomach. The merger is a visage, a guise for your King to be completely in control. 

This was never about peace, this was always going to be about power.

“And does Prince Jaeyun know about this?” you ask astonished. Surely, if Jaeyun knew of the inner workings of his father, he would put a stop to it all. Although Jaeyun lives to serve his people, he would never sacrifice others to replenish Glengyre, it’s the reason he has always voted against war.

Heeseung's gaze remains firm, "Of course he does," he replies sternly, "You think the Prince would be kept in the dark about something like this?"

As Heeseung's words sink in, a wave of realisation washes over you, accompanied by a sense of betrayal. You can only hope Jaeyun has a bigger plan, one that can save both kingdoms from perishing.

______

As night descends upon the castle, you navigate the dimly lit corridors with determined steps, your mind swirling with conflicting emotions. Jaeyun's cryptic note had beckoned you to the Council c

Chambers under the cover of darkness, although, you were conflicted with the idea knowing his plans now to infiltrate Lethamhill from within.

However, this served as your chance to speak directly to Jaeyun and figure out what his true intentions are. Every atom of your being is saying he cannot be so foolish as to destroy a country just in the hopes of building up his own, but you still approach the meeting with a wary heart.

With a heavy push, you open the door and the memories of your final night together flood your mind. But you refuse to be swayed by the urge within your body and heart; you must find out what is truly going on.

The room is cloaked in shadows, save for the faint glow of moonlight filtering through the windows. As you step inside, the air seems charged with tension, every creak of the floorboards echoing in the silence.

Jaeyun is leaning against the very desk he made love to you on countless times, the very desk you promised your undying love to him. His head whips up as he hears you enter the Council Chamber, his body lit by the moon and nothing more, yet, you can see the twinkle in his eyes as if it is a bright summer’s morning.

He stands as you edge closer to him, "It's been too long since I was graced with such beauty in my lone presence," he remarks, his voice soft and warm. His hand moves instinctively to find your hips, but you step back, the tension in the air palpable.

"Tell me it isn’t true," you implore, your heart pounding in your chest as you search his eyes for reassurance, desperate for him to dispel the troubling rumours that have plagued your thoughts.

Jaeyun's brow furrows in confusion, his expression a mixture of concern and curiosity, "Tell me what isn't, my love?" he responds, his voice laced with genuine confusion.

"Don't call me that. You have no right anymore," you respond sharply, your voice tinged with bitterness. The pain of betrayal simmers just beneath the surface, threatening to spill over at any moment.

"You'll always be my love, Y/N," Jaeyun insists, his tone pleading as he reaches out to you, but you hold yourself stiffly, refusing to be swayed by his familiar touch.

"But you're not mine, not if what I heard is true," you retort, your voice trembling with a mixture of hurt and anger. 

Jaeyun's expression softens, "What did you hear?" he asks, his voice barely above a whisper, as if afraid of the answer.

In Jaeyun’s eyes, he has done nothing wrong. He has kept Princess Mia at a respectable length at all times, never shared the same bed, and made it abundantly clear that this marriage will harbour no love as he already gave his heart to someone else - to you.

Which could only mean you know one thing.

You feel a surge of frustration welling up inside you, threatening to implode as you confront Jaeyun with the truth.

"That you are to marry Princess Mia for the sole purpose of becoming king and take complete control of Lethamhill," you reveal, your voice trembling as you lay bare the painful reality of the situation, “Please, Jaeyun, tell me this isn’t true. Tell me otherwise.”

You feel the weight of each word as it leaves your lips. The dim light from the moon casts long shadows across the room, adding to the solemn atmosphere as you confront Jaeyun, the man you once thought you knew so well.

You are begging him to prove your mind wrong, to let you in on a lavish plan that bonds the countries together by outwitting his father. 

Yet he offers nothing.

For a moment, there is silence between you, broken only by the soft sound of your breathing. Your figure tightens as any hope you had for him, for this to be a lie, slowly dwindles away.

Finally, Jaeyun speaks, his voice barely above a whisper, "Y/N, please understand," he begins, his tone pleading as he searches for the right words to convey his thoughts, “It is not by choice.”

“There is always a choice, Jaeyun,” you spit back at him, head thumping with the realisation that Jaeyun does not have an ulterior motive, he is going along with the plan to destroy Lethamhill, “What was the point of agreeing to marry Princess Mia and avoiding war when you are only going to cause one anyway?” 

Jaeyun's shoulders sag under the weight of your accusation, his gaze dropping to the floor as he wrestles with his conscience, "It isn't like that," he protests weakly, his voice tinged with sorrow, "There will be no war."

“But people will be hurt and in consequence, they will die. That to me is no better than war,” you counter, your voice laced with agitation.

“Some may die but our people will be safe,” he insists, his words ringing around the room.

You seethe as he shows no willingness to relent; you sacrificed true love, your happiness, all for the better of the kingdom you call home, and yet Jaeyun sets make a fool of it. Your kingdom may flourish, but it will be covered in a sea of blood and power. Glengyre will no longer be a place you can call home if this were to be the case.

“But what of Princess Mia’s people? They will surely perish,” you argue, your heart breaking at the thought of innocent lives that will be lost in the name of power and control.

Jaeyun sighs, his expression haunted as he grapples with the weight of his decisions, "I took an oath to protect my kingdom," he murmurs, his voice barely audible above the din of your thoughts.

You step forward, jaw tightening and fists clenched, “And you will take an oath on Friday,” you remind him, your voice thick with disappointment, “To their kingdom, to be their leader and save them from their current state.”

“The King-”

“Enough! No excuses. The king does not have a final say once you are to be wed. You will be crowned King Consort of Lethamhill, you get to have the final decision as to what to do, what is best.”

Jaeyun's hand hesitates midair, trembling as if caught in a tempest of conflict. Your impassioned words strike at the very core of his being, awakening a sense of clarity amidst the fog. For the first time, he begins to see the shadow that his father's influence has cast over him, distorting his once unyielding sense of honour and integrity.

In your unwavering presence, he discovers a beacon, guiding him back to the principles he formerly valued. 

“My love-” he starts, but you interject once again.

“No. Until you return the Jaeyun I once knew, the man that I love, I am not yours,” you back away slowly, voice trembling as tears prick your eyes, “I belong to him, to my Jaeyun, not you.”

_____

Two days later, you stand outside Miss Son's office, the oak door imposing yet familiar. The flickering torches cast dancing shadows across the corridor, adding an eerie ambience to the castle's interior. Your heart pounds in your chest as you raise your hand to knock, the weight of your decision heavy on your shoulders. 

With the wedding tomorrow, you do not know how she will react to your request.

The door creaks open, revealing the warm glow of Miss Son's office. Stepping inside, you're enveloped by the scent of parchment and ink, a comforting aroma that reminds you of countless meetings and tasks undertaken within these walls.

"Come in," Miss Son's voice breaks through your reverie, and you enter, feeling a mixture of nerves and determination.

"Miss Son, I'm afraid I must pardon myself from my role," you state, the words coming out in a rush.

Miss Son's expression softens with concern as she listens to your explanation, “Why so suddenly? Is Princess Mia giving you a hard time?” She leans forward, her gaze unwavering as she waits for you to continue.

"No, no, she is quite lovely...I fear I haven't seen my brothers in a long time. I think it is time for me to go back and care for them," you explain, your voice faltering slightly as you try to mask the true reason behind your decision.

Miss Son's eyes narrow, a knowing glint in her gaze, "Are you sure this has nothing to do with the Crown Prince marrying the Princess?" she asks gently, her tone filled with understanding.

You swallow hard, feeling a lump form in your throat. The truth hangs heavy in the air, begging to be acknowledged.

"Whatever do you mean?" you reply, though you know she sees right through your facade.

“I mean, I am head of over one hundred servants, I know everything that happens within these castle walls,” she gestures around the room with her finger, eyebrows raised expectantly, “You and Prince Jaeyun lack discretion. Sneaking around, leaving traces of yourself which I have had to clean up, you are both useless at this secret love affair.”

Of course, she knew everything. You and Jaeyun were not exactly quiet in your passionate encounters and pieces of your uniform lay in different areas of the castle; you just thought you were both extremely lucky, but it happens that your luck is named Miss Son.

“I understand why you must leave but it will be a great shame to lose you, Miss Y/N,” she offers a smile of sympathy before gesturing you away quickly, “Now go get some rest and leave tomorrow morning. With the commotion of the wedding, you should be able to sneak out with ease.”

You bow appreciatively to her, muttering an almost silent thank you as you retreat to your bed chambers, your bones heavy with sorrow.

_____

The tranquillity of the maid's chambers envelops you as you nestle beneath your threadbare quilt, its thin fabric offering little comfort against the weight of your thoughts. With the royal wedding looming just 17 hours away, sleep eludes you as you mentally chart your journey back home.

The prospect of reuniting with your brothers brings a bittersweet relief, a respite from the tumult that swirls within the castle walls. However, when you think about your impending departure, you can't shake the lingering anguish that pulls at your heartstrings, tying you to this location despite your desire to move on.

Jaeyun.

As you ponder the situation laid before you, you wonder whether Jaeyun fully comprehends the ramifications of his decisions. Half of your heart longs to remain by his side, hoping to guide him away from the path of destruction. But you cannot be by his side, not after tomorrow.

The door to your room creaks open, the sound echoing softly in the dimly lit quarters. You lay still, pretending to be asleep, though your senses are alert to every sound and movement around you. You suspect it's one of the other maids, returning to collect some forgotten item before retiring for the night.

Miss Son has led the others to the tavern for a ‘light’ celebration ahead of the royal wedding. While it was meant to be a joyous occasion, the event only serves to heighten your anxiety. You would find little joy in the festivities, preferring the quiet solitude of your room.

As the footsteps draw closer to your bed, your pulse quickens, and you hold your breath, hoping to discourage any interaction. However, when you feel the mattress dip slightly and warm arms encircle your waist, your tension begins to ebb away.

The touch is unmistakably Jaeyun's, sending a jolt of both comfort and turmoil through your body. Despite your conflicting feelings, you find yourself relaxing into his embrace, seeking refuge in the quiet intimacy of the moment.

“My love, I am sorry,” he says quietly, his lips peppering kisses to your shoulder blade, each kiss lingering longer than the last. His hands trace the outline of your figure as they etch along your waist and sides.

Jaeyun has never laid with you like this, the opportunities scarce in the secrets of the night, this moment only makes you wish you had taken more chances to hold one another close.

“Jaeyun, you cannot be here,” you state, trying to swallow your love and sorrow, but they’re far too big to choke down.

“Face me, Y/N,” he commands, his tone is not forceful but pleading. He needs you to look at him to fully see his emotions. As of right now, you think of him as a deceitful Prince, set to ruin innocent lives, and he will not stand for it, “Please.”

It is hard to face a man you love who seems to mirror only a shell of himself, yet, you turn around per his request. Perhaps it was the hierarchy that lay between you, or maybe it is just your love for him that outweighs any apprehension you have of him.

Your eyes meet and his heart stops, the tears in your eyes only exhibit how this is affecting you, “I cannot stand you being mad at me,” his lips pout as he speaks and you wish to kiss him like never before.

In your mind, if you kiss him right now it may cause a chain reaction in which he changes his mind on the matters of Lethamhill, but that is foolish thinking.

"Jaeyun, you know I cannot condone what you're doing," you reply softly, your voice laced with sadness, "This marriage, this plan - it is wrong. It goes against everything I thought you stood for."

He reaches out to gently brush a stray tear from your cheek, his touch sending a shiver down your spine, "I know, Y/N. Believe me, I never wanted any of this," he confesses, his voice laced with regret.

You search his eyes, grappling with conflicting emotions of love, anger, and betrayal. Regardless of the hurt, you can't help but feel a flicker of hope at his words. Maybe there's still a chance to sway him, to remind him of the man you once knew - the man who would never sacrifice his principles for power.

“My Jaeyun is in there somewhere, I know he is. Why can’t he be the one to rule as King Consort and make this right?” you beg, your hands playing with the tassels of his white nightshirt.

Jaeyun’s expression is unwavering with regret and pain, “He will be, I will make sure of it.”

“But how? I cannot see him when I look at you,” you retort, lip quivering at the prospect of losing him both figuratively and physically.

“He needs you to guide him, I need you to guide me, that much was clear today,” he begins, his lips find your shoulder once again, his teeth laying claim to you. All the marks from your previous encounters have begun to fade, leaving you bare for someone else to take hold, and he refuses to let that happen.

He must fix this.

Sucking on the base of your neck, his hands grip the back of your thighs, pulling you further into his body, your legs now sandwiched between his, “Today, you made me see my ways, how it was wrong of me to honour a vow to one kingdom and not another. I need you by my side.” 

Being surrounded by his father and his men, their constant words or assurance that this is the right thing to do for Glengyre swayed him to believe it too. Then you put him in his place, allowing him to see how preposterous the plan was. 

He needs you.

Jaeyun kisses up to the side of your mouth, his eyes now looking desperately into yours, “Please do not go tomorrow.”

“How did you know?”

“Miss Son, she told me,” he confesses.

Your hands lay splayed on his chest as you contemplate whether to bring him closer, or push him away, “How am I meant to stand by idly while I lose you and know of your plans?” you query.

It is selfish of him to ask such a request, he knows this, but he will not lose hope on you so easily, “Trust me, please, just trust me. If not as Prince Jaeyun, as your Jaeyun.” 

His words echo in your mind, battling internally whether to fully put your faith in a man who not a few days ago swore destruction to people like yourself.

The room feels suffocatingly small as you grapple with your thoughts, his touch igniting a storm of conflicting feelings within you. His lips trailing along your skin, leaving a trail of warmth and desire in their wake, only serve to cloud your thoughts further.

But amidst the haze of uncertainty, there's a glimmer of hope - a flicker of the man you once knew, buried beneath layers of duty and obligation. You can't help but cling to that hope, to the belief that somewhere within him, the true Jaeyun still exists.

His lips softly press themselves against yours, the feeling causing stray tears to slip from your eyes. You missed him and his kiss only served as evidence of his equal longing for you.

You grip onto his nightshirt and pull him to lay on top of you, the feeling of your lover in your arms is suddenly the only thing occupying your mind. All your worries and woes are now gone, washed away from your brain as his tongue slips into your mouth and his body is pressed heavily against you.

"I missed you terribly, my love," he murmurs against your lips, his words tinged with longing, "Tell me you thought of me?"

His yearning infuses his words, coaxing the last remnants of tears to escape your eyes, "Every waking moment was filled with thoughts of you," you confess, holding him tighter, seeking solace in his embrace.

Your admission blankets him with comfort, reassured by the enduring strength of your love. Initially, when you urged him to marry Princess Mia, part of him foolishly believed it was to liberate yourselves from secrecy and not just for the good of the people, that you grew tired of sneaking around the cold castle with him. Now, as he holds you close once more, your kisses igniting need, he realises the folly of that assumption.

With his right hand, he brushes aside the strap of your nightie, allowing your tit to spill slightly from its confines. The sight of your ample flesh awakens a hunger within Jaeyun, prompting him to lean in, his teeth gently grazing the curve of your breast.

His mouth leaves a trail of open-mouthed kisses as he descends toward your nipple, delicately taking it into his mouth. With a mixture of tenderness and fervent desire, he nibbles and flicks the nub, his tongue swirling eagerly around it. His hands firmly grip your waist, anchoring your writhing body in place.

You're consumed by a desperate longing for him, craving his love once more, unable to wait as he teases your body.

Jaeyun knows that you both usually do not have time, opting for a quick session of raw passion before retreating to your chambers. But tonight is different. Tonight, there are no constraints, no fear of interruption or pressing obligations. Tonight, he is entirely yours, dedicated to fulfilling every desire and whim that you may have. Jaeyun had made sure every servant was out of the quarters till at least dawn.

What you thought was Miss Son’s idea was founded behind Jaeyun’s generosity. 

As Jaeyun continues to lavish attention on your breast, his ministries grow more fervent, driven by the desire to reconnect with you. His lips and tongue work in tandem, igniting sparks of pleasure that course through your body like wildfire.

"Jaeyun," you moan, the sound escaping your lips in a breathless plea as his hand slips beneath your nightgown and into your panties, "I need you," you confess, your fingers tracing urgent paths up and down his back as you attempt to remove his shirt, eager to feel the warmth of his skin against yours.

"I know, darling, I know," he murmurs, his words intermingled with kisses that caress the sensitive flesh of your erect nipple, "But tonight, I want to savour every moment with you, to show you just how much you mean to me."

His touch ignites a fire within you as two of his fingers glide along the slick surface of your arousal, drawing forth a soft purr of satisfaction from your lips. Your body hums with anticipation, aching for his touch as he guides his digits to your entrance, the sensation of them slipping inside you with effortless ease sending waves of pleasure crashing over you.

As Jaeyun's fingers delve deeper into your slick warmth, a gasp escapes your lips, your body instinctively arching into his touch. Each stroke of your walls sends ripples of pleasure coursing through you, heightening the intensity of the moment.

His lips are back on yours as he thrusts his fingers in at a fast pace, his thumb now finding your clit as he rapidly flicks it back and forth. The motion causes you to breathe into his mouth, your lover feeling as though you are injecting him with newfound life. He knew he had missed you but having you like this, surrendering to his touch only made it much more evident in his heart.

“You are so beautiful, Y/N. You are utterly captivating, a masterpiece brought to life," he whispers, his voice filled with awe. 

Despite your comparisons of yourself to Princess Mia that you made earlier, you feel like the most beautiful woman in the world with his words. And to him, you are. You will always be the most breathtaking girl he will ever see; not even Aphrodite holds a candle to you, especially not as your face contorts in pleasure.

Each curl and stretch of his fingers scissors you open, making you whine in his ear as you beg him to go faster, which he obliges, his forearm veins protruding as he tenses, putting all his might into pleasuring you.

His unrelenting tempo, along with the tantalising exploration of his tongue, drives you to the edge of bliss, preparing you for the impending release that pulses inside you like a building storm. "Jaeyun, I'm cumming," you manage to exclaim, your words muffled against his lips as you exchange air and need.

"Cum, my love. Let go for me," he pleads, his voice gruff as he grinds his hardness against the fragile flesh of your thigh, looking for some type of release. Trapped in his night bottoms, the throbbing in his loins worsens with each passing second.

With a rough curl of his fingers, you surrender to the torrent of sensation that crashes over you, crying out his name as pleasure consumes you whole. Your body convulses in the throes of orgasm, your essence spilling over his hand. You only wish it was his cock.

Luckily for you, he also dreams of being inside you, the friction on his dick unbearable as he watches you heave out short breaths as your body tries to regulate itself. 

Jaeyun removes his hand from your swollen cunt, kneeling between your legs as he takes in your already spent body. But he isn’t finished with you.

Swiftly, Jaeyun sheds his clothing, the fabric falling to the floor in a whisper of motion before crawling back on top of you. He reaches for your nightgown's hem, sliding his fingertips over the shabby fabric as he tugs it up and over your head. In the dark light, your nude body is bathed in a delicate glow, a picture of ethereal beauty that makes him gasp with need.

As your bodies meld together, skin to skin, the electric current of desire arcs between you. His lips capture yours once again in a searing kiss, hands roaming over your body as he longs to feel every inch of you.

You can’t help but wonder if this will be the last time you have Jaeyun in your arms like this, so you have to make it count.

Sitting up, you feel a burst of confidence rush through you as you push him onto his back, your hands firmly grabbing his shoulders to keep him in place. The horror on his face only strengthens your urge to straddle him, a natural need propelling you forward.

His eyes widen in surprise at your sudden assertiveness, unaccustomed to you taking the lead in your lovemaking. But there's a spark of excitement in his eyes, an eagerness to yield to your touch and let you have your way with him.

Positioning yourself above him, you guide his erect cock beneath you, your core pulsating with excitement. You lower yourself onto him with tantalising slowness, the smooth heat of your sex wrapping around his length inch by inch.

As you start moving, a low sigh leaves his lips, and your hips swing back and forth, The sensation of his hardness buried deep within you sends sparks of ecstasy coursing through your veins, starting a fire that threatens to engulf you both.

Jaeyun's whimpers of bliss fill the air, his hands tightening around your hips as he tries to match your relentless pace, pushing up to meet you with frantic desperation. "God, Y/N," he exclaims, his voice thick with need, "You feel incredible wrapped around me like this."

Your claws sink into his chest as you bounce with renewed zest, taking complete control. Your motions are quick and commanding, leaving him with no choice but to give in to the intense feelings racing through his body, "I've missed this," you admit, your voice heavy with desire, "missed the way you fill me up."

“You have?” he opens his eyes to see your tits bouncing up and down your chest, a sight he thought about most as he stroked his member in the shower while you were out of reach, “Do you want me to fill you up properly?” he asks in a mischievous tone, his hand pulling your head to meet his, cloaking your lips with his own.

Nodding, you mewl into his mouth as both of you groan simultaneously, the sound of skin slapping and your vocalised pleasure bouncing along the walls. It’s raw and passionate, it’s unlike any other time Jaeyun has fucked into you. It’s a memory you’ll cherish forever, especially if this was to be the last time.

“Y/N, my love, I can’t hold out much longer,” he confesses as his eyebrows scrunch together, trying to hold himself back from releasing into you until he knows you’re going to cum again.

Heeding your request, he grips your waist tight, halting your movements as he pistons into you, using all his might to bring you both to the peak. With 3 forceful thrusts, his hips stutter and legs tense as he shoots his seed into you, endless hot spurts painting your walls.

“Please cum inside me, let me feel it,” you beg between kisses, riding him so hard that your thin bed frame is on the verge of collapsing beneath you.

It feels like a dream to have his cum stuffed inside of you again, causing you to follow suit, cumming over his cock with a scream of his name, one that could surely be heard all the way to Lethamhill. 

Jaeyun proceeds to buck his hips up into you, riding out your orgasms together as you collapse on top of him. The inside of your thighs tremble from your combined pleasure, and the intensity of your lovemaking leaves you both breathless and exhausted.

As you come down, you find yourselves tangled together in a mess of limbs and sweat, your bodies still humming with the aftershocks of your shared passion. And as you lie there, spent and sated in each other's arms, you only feel the love between both of you radiating through your shared pants.

Looking up at him, you see his eyes glazed with satisfaction, a lazy smile plastered on the Crown Prince’s gorgeous face. He always spoke about how you were a vision, yet he is the one with a beauty so rare it’s almost impossible to understand how he is real.

But he is and he is holding you in his arms as he slips out of you, pulling your body up to rest more comfortably on himself. 

Your mind now clearing up from the fog of sex allows you to go back to your conversation before this impromptu session with him. 

"Can you truly change the course of this plan?" you ask, your voice barely above a whisper as you search his eyes for any sign of reassurance.

Jaeyun's gaze meets yours, unwavering in its intensity, "I will do whatever it takes to make things right, I will find a way to reconcile my duty with my conscience."

"I want to believe you," you admit, your voice trembling with vulnerability, "But I need more than words, Jaeyun. I need to see action, to know that you're truly committed to making amends."

Jaeyun nods solemnly, understanding the weight of your request. "I will show you, Y/N. I will prove to you that I am worthy of your trust," he vows, his fingers gently tracing patterns along your skin as if to imprint his promise upon you.

“How?”

“I have a plan, but I must detail it out first before I speak it aloud. Please, just trust me.”

_____

The castle is filled with people here to watch the wedding, the wedding you have been dreading since Jaeyun left your quarters last night. He snuck out in the early hours of the morning before the rest of the staff came home. It was a bittersweet goodbye, your bodies that were tangled with one another for hours were pried apart, possibly forever.

The final kiss he placed on your lips is all you can think about as you stand obediently with the other staff, Heeseung by your side as everyone awaits Princess Mia’s arrival. The buzz around the hall is electric yet you feel like an insect, the closer you get to the nuptials, the closer you are to being zapped in the heart.

You feel uneasy as you see Jaeyun fiddle with his ring, the one he will take from his right hand and place on his bride. The more you ponder, the more you come to the realisation that maybe you should have just left, gone home with the cloak of the wedding as your opportunity to flee. 

But Jaeyun asked you to trust him, that he will do the right thing for everyone. The trust you have does not cancel out your breaking heart, however. 

Dressed in his princely attire, Jaeyun exudes a regal air as he stands at the altar, his uniform immaculate and his demeanour poised. Every detail of his appearance seems meticulously crafted to accentuate his undeniable beauty, from the crisp white fabric adorned with intricate gold detailing to the way his dark locks are artfully styled to frame his face.

As the royal band fills the air with music, the grandeur of the moment is punctuated by the entrance of Princess Mia, a vision of grace and elegance. Jaeyun's gaze shifts to her, momentarily captivated by her presence, and you feel a pang of sadness knowing that this is the beginning of the end for you.

This was it, you were losing him before your very eyes, but you cannot be selfish. This was the right thing to do, a sacrifice you must abide by for the kingdom you love. 

Truth be told, it is easier to come to terms with marriage now that you know Jaeyun will do whatever is in his power to truly bring solace between both Glengyre and Lethamhill. Before, once Heeseung revealed the malicious plans to you, you started to wonder if giving up your love was worth it or if it was all for nothing, but now you know it will not be in vain. 

Princess Mia greets Jaeyun at the alter and curtsies, her fiance mirroring her action while you swallow the lump in your throat. There is a glint in both their eyes, while you know it isn’t love, you do question it with a pierced heart. If Jaeyun were to fall in love with her, which is not implausible considering even in the short-lived time you acted as her maid-in-waiting you witnessed how humble and gracious she is, just as Jaeyun is. They match perfectly in every way.

You fight the urge to cry as the ceremony gets underway, the Bishop beginning to unify them both together. 

The moment arrives when the officiant solemnly intones, "If anyone present knows of any reason why this couple should not be joined in holy matrimony, speak now or forever hold your peace." The weight of the words hangs heavy in the air, the tension palpable as the guests hold their breath. 

Not a soul would be foolish enough to-

“We object.”

A choir of gasps fill the air as two harmonious voices speak their objection. Your eyes fall upon them as they smile at one another, letting go of their hands. 

Prince Jaeyun and Princess Mia objected to their own wedding. 

The shock reverberates through the room, eyes widen and murmurs erupt among the attendees. Not you nor Heeseung know what to do in this situation, both of you staring at Jaeyun with bewilderment, wondering what on earth he was doing.

Was this part of his grand plan?

"Ladies and gentlemen, esteemed guests of Glengyre and Lethamhill," he begins, his voice steady yet filled with conviction. "I stand before you today not only as your Prince but as a voice for justice and truth. For too long, a shadow of deceit has loomed over our kingdoms, orchestrated by none other than my own father, the King of Glengyre."

He pauses, allowing his words to sink in, before continuing with a sense of urgency, "It has come to my attention that he was exploiting this marriage as a means to hold Lethamhill hostage, to seize complete control and dominate its people. This nefarious plan would only bring harm and danger to both our kingdoms, jeopardizing the lives and well-being of our citizens. The exact opposite of what he has promised you all."

Beside him, Princess Mia nods in agreement, her expression mirroring his determination, "Furthermore," Jaeyun continues, "Princess Mia has brought to my attention disturbing revelations regarding her father, King James of Lethamhill. It has been made clear to us that he seeks to exploit this union to unlawfully seize land and resources from Glengyre, with the intent of displacing our people to expand his own domain."

The outrage in his voice is palpable, his eyes flashing with defiance as he declares, "Princess Mia and I stand united in our outrage and determination to put an end to these injustices. We refuse to allow our kingdoms to be pawns in the power games of corrupt rulers. It is time for us to take a stand."

Jaeyun’s eyes flicker to you as he utters his next words.

“We will not be getting married.” 

Your knees buckle beneath you, a surge of relief and disbelief flooding through every fiber of your being. The love of your life, the one you were on the brink of losing forever, stands before you, his gaze locking with yours in a silent exchange of understanding. A small, reassuring smile graces his lips

Beside him, Princess Mia commands attention with unwavering confidence, her voice ringing out with authority, "They are not worthy to rule over our sacred lands," she declares, her words cutting through the tension like a sharpened blade. Her gaze pierces through the gathered officials, her unwavering resolve a stark contrast to their shock, "Their sinister schemes amount to nothing short of treason against the kingdoms they swore to protect," she continues, her tone unwavering, "We demand their immediate dethronement and call for this wedding to be transformed into a coronation for both myself and Prince Jaeyun."

The reaction from the royal box is instantaneous, a cacophony of outraged protests and indignant exclamations filling the air. The two Kings, their faces flushed with fury, rise from their seats in a display of unbridled anger, their voices drowned out by the resounding tumult.

“You cannot do this! I am the rightful King of Glengyre,” Jaeyun’s father shouts across the room.

Jaeyun smiles mockingly to his father, “You are right, we cannot do this, not without a vote from the people of our kingdoms,” he says matter of factly.

As the commotion reaches its peak, Jaeyun and Princess Mia stand firm, their resolve unshaken by the storm of dissent around them. Together, they face the fury of the royal box with unwavering determination, their eyes locked in a silent exchange of solidarity.

Despite the chaos, Jaeyun's voice rises above the din, his words infused with unwavering conviction, "We will not allow our kingdoms to be held hostage by the greed and treachery of a few individuals," he declares, his tone ringing out with authority. "It is our duty as leaders to uphold the values of justice and integrity, to safeguard the well-being of our people above all else."

Princess Mia adds her voice to his, her words echoing his sentiments with equal fervour, "We stand united against tyranny and corruption," she proclaims, her gaze sweeping over the crowd with steely resolve, "Together, we will forge a future built on trust, compassion, and unity."

Heeseung looks to you, eyes wide as if begging for answers, yet, you cannot offer him any. You knew Jaeyun had a plan but to go out on a limb like this was not what you were expecting. Shaking your head, your eyes scan the crowd to see their reaction, each face equally as shocked as they are appalled by the Kings’ true intentions with this union.

“Please stand with us. If you wish for Princess Mia and myself to be respective leaders of our kingdoms, Say I,” Jaeyun exudes confidence in his stature but you look at his hand which is fiddling with his jacket, a telltale sign that he is nervous.

Who would not be nervous? This could end in death for both Jaeyun and Princess Mia. If they do not have the people on their side, the Kings will seek to execute them, that much is a given.

The guests in the pews whisper to one another, the discussions hushed as they consider Jaeyun’s words. Your heart races as you await the collective response from the guests. Will they stand with Jaeyun and Princess Mia, or will fear and uncertainty prevail, leaving them isolated and vulnerable to the wrath of the Kings? The air is heavy with anticipation, each second stretching into an eternity as the fate of Glengyre and Lethamhill hangs in the balance.

“I,” a voice from beside you yells out, causing you to flinch. Heeseung, the once esteemed royal guard makes the first vocalisation of agreement. It shocks you considering he was always one to worship the king, “I give my faith to a new king,” he stands forward, kneeling before Jaeyun.

His actions cause a domino effect, echoes of ‘I’ and ‘Here here’ can be heard throughout the hall, each person projecting their trust in their Prince and Princess. 

The prince looks at you with pleading eyes, hoping your trust can be stretched to this moment. 

“I,” you say, the words are lost amongst the commotion but Jaeyun sees it, the love in your eyes, the trust in him to lead the kingdom you hold dear to your heart. Although he must get the approval of all his people, you are the one he needs it from the most. Without your support, he doesn’t feel fit enough to be King.

“Guards, please see the Kings out,” he orders before turning to face the bishop, “Would you do the honours of coronating us, your grace,” he bows, showing his respect.

“Kneel before me, Your Highness,” the Bishop speaks softly.

The hall once filled with chaos and debacle is now silent, smiles and hearts full as their honourable Crown Prince is made King of Glengyre. You have never felt pride for the royal family, but you know that will all change now.

As he is crowned, a hush falls over the hall, a reverent silence that speaks volumes of the significance of this moment. Jaeyun, now King of Glengyre, rises from his kneeling position with a newfound solemnity, his eyes shining with determination and purpose. Beside him, Princess Mia also kneels, her hand clasped firmly in his as they prepare to lead their kingdoms into a new era of prosperity and unity.

The Bishop's voice carries through the hall as he recites the ancient words of coronation, his tone reverent and ceremonial. With each word spoken, the weight of responsibility settles upon Jaeyun's shoulders, a reminder of the solemn duty he has undertaken to rule justly and with compassion.

As the final words of the coronation ritual echo through the hall, Jaeyun and Princess Mia exchange a meaningful glance, their bond strengthened by the vows they have made before their people. They will do what their fathers couldn’t.

“There is to be a party to celebrate the union tonight, the entirety of the kingdoms are invited,” King Jaeyun proclaims, beaming with pride before ushering Queen Mia out of the hall.

With the commotion of happiness and celebration, you get swept up by Heeseung, swinging you around in his arms. The feeling leaves you with a sense of purpose and gratitude to both rulers of the kingdoms. They did what most would be too scared to do, a testament to their love for their citizens.

_____

The night sky above Glengyre is ablaze with the glow of a thousand lanterns, casting a warm and inviting light over the festivities below. The sound of laughter and music fills the air, mingling with the tantalizing aroma of roasted meats and spiced wines. People from all walks of life gather in the grand courtyard of the castle, their differences set aside as they come together to celebrate the dawn of a new era. Never in your years of living did you think you would ever see such a promise for the people.

Jaeyun ordered carriages and carts to bring those on the outskirts of the kingdoms to the castle, making good on his promise. He wanted everyone to be part of this victory, especially those who had suffered at the hands of his father.

Effortlessly, Jaeyun navigates through the people, garnering respect and esteem from everyone he comes into contact with. He pauses to meet and converse with both royalty and peasants, his sincere kindness and humility converting even the most cynical minds.

Barrels of liquor and wine line the perimeter, and long tables creak beneath the weight of indulgent treats, transforming the courtyard into a true feast. Musicians play lively tunes, encouraging guests to dance and revel late into the night.

You, amidst the crowd of celebrants, are witnessing a momentous occasion. You are witnessing how a kingdom ripped apart by conflict and division can come together under a banner of growth and optimism. And you see that Glengyre's future is more promising than ever when you see the happy smiles of your fellow citizens.

“Thank you for trusting me,” Jaeyun’s low voice whispers beside you as he rests his hand on the lower part of your back. Instinctively, you go to move away, scared to be seen, but he holds you in place, hand gripped tight.

Looking into his eyes, you find yourself lost in the depths of his gaze, each flicker of light reflecting his unwavering determination. His touch sends a shiver down your spine as he gently kisses your hand, a gesture that feels both intimate and surreal.

"I trust you to be a fine king," you murmur softly, sincerity lacing every word. "It already looks good on you," you add with a playful smirk, admiring his regal presence and undeniable charisma.

Jaeyun chuckles, a twinkle of amusement dancing in his eyes as he spins around, basking in your laughter. The joyous sound fills the air, a melody that he never tires of hearing. When he finally stands before you again, his expression grows serious, his hands still clasping yours.

"You know, being a queen would look good on you," he remarks, his tone teasing yet earnest.

You scoff incredulously, unable to fathom such a notion. "Perhaps one could dream of that in another lifetime."

"Why not this one?" Jaeyun counters, his gaze unwavering as he meets your eyes.

Confusion clouds your features as you struggle to comprehend his meaning. Before you can protest further, he continues, his words carrying a weight that leaves you breathless.

"Well, I am a king without a queen. It does look rather pathetic, doesn’t it?" he jests lightly, his smile masking the gravity of his declaration. "But with you by my side…"

The implications of his words hit you like a bolt of lightning, leaving you reeling in disbelief. "You cannot make me queen, Jaeyun," you protest weakly, your heart fluttering erratically at the mere thought.

Jaeyun's smile softens, his gaze filled with tenderness as he squeezes your hands reassuringly. "But when I marry you, you will not have a choice."

The weight of his proclamation hangs heavy in the air, each syllable sinking into your consciousness with undeniable clarity. To marry Jaeyun is a dream beyond your wildest imaginings, a fantasy that you never dared to entertain. Yet here he stands, offering you a future that you once believed to be unattainable.

"That is preposterous, Jaeyun. You can’t marry a maid," you protest, the words tumbling from your lips in a mixture of disbelief and awe.

Shrugging, he lets go of your hands, “It is not the most scandalous thing I have done this week,” he smirks, eyebrows wiggling as you both recall the events that just happened a mere few hours ago.

Taking the ring from his right pinky finger, he holds it out to you, face serious now, "Marry me," he implores, his voice filled with earnestness, "be the queen our people need. I trust no one but you to help guide me to better serve this kingdom."

Your throat tightens with emotion, tears brimming in your eyes as you gaze at the ring before you, a symbol of love and commitment. It is a moment that takes your breath away, a choice that will shape the course of your future and the destiny of your kingdom.

As you reach out to take the ring, the weight of Jaeyun's words hangs heavy in the air. Marrying him would mean stepping into a world of royalty, a world you never imagined yourself a part of. Yet, with each passing moment, the idea becomes more alluring.

But reality crashes in, reminding you of the vast chasm that separates your worlds. "Jaeyun, you know I cannot," you reply, your voice barely above a whisper, laced with both longing and resignation, "I am but a maid, not worthy of such a title."

Jaeyun's expression softens, his eyes searching yours with an intensity that sends shivers down your spine, "You are worthy of so much more than you realise, Y/N," he insists, his voice gentle but unwavering, "You have already proven yourself to be a queen in every way that matters."

His words resonate within you, stirring something deep within your soul. For so long, you had resigned yourself to the confines of your station, never daring to reach for something beyond your grasp. But now, faced with the possibility of a future with Jaeyun, you find yourself daring to believe in the impossible.

Gently, he slides the ring onto your finger, and you feel a rush of warmth flood through you as if sealing a pact with destiny itself. Looking up at Jaeyun, you find yourself unable to speak, overwhelmed by the enormity of the moment.

Without a word, Jaeyun pulls you into his arms, holding you close as if to reassure you of his love and commitment. In that embrace, you feel a sense of belonging, a sense of purpose that you never thought possible.

“I love you, Y/N. I am at your mercy as your future husband and as your king.”

You smile widely, sniffling away the happiness of tears that fall from your face, “I love you, too, Jaeyun. I vow myself to you forever.”

Your husband-to-be kisses the top of your head as he pulls away, joy radiating from every atom of his being, “Let us celebrate, perhaps in the council chamber?” he teases, fingers trickling up your forearms.

With a sarcastic rolling of your eyes, you follow him. Not just for tonight, but forever.

[astroyongie]

꒷꒦︶꒷꒦︶ ๋ ࣭ ⭑꒷꒦ Kpop Tea Part 1. ꒷꒦︶꒷꒦︶ ๋ ࣭ ⭑꒷꒦

Note: there's the list of some teas to celebrate my come back <3 This first part is only concerning female idols! WARNINGS: All names are censured. Requests with emojis asking for names won't be answered. Some tea can be sensitive. One X per member per group. Take it lightly EVERYTHING DONE THROUGH TAROT!

Red Velvet

X has made decisions for the continuation of her career and it does seem like she will not renovate her contract.

X's idol image and self is totally different from her real person. she often finds conflict in hiding this, but she is also an idol for so long that she tends sometimes to take her idol image too seriously

X is the type of person that keeps walking in the path of trauma and putting herself in situations that recall her of her trauma (coping mechanism at most), repetition of cycles. She calls for that storm way too much

X has a hard time making peace with her past

X has been struggling with her mental health a lot, although she seems like she has been holding on well, what she posts on social media does not correspond to her reality

Blackpink

X has everything in her power, a lot of people at her feet (mostly because she collected a lot of dirt on people). but at what cost? sometimes her actions are very contradictory to what she preaches

X has not been very fair with people around her, her behaviors are irrational, she doesnt question herself on her actions. x has also been struggling with addictions

X has one goal on her head and she doesn't care how much she has to sacrifice to get that for herself

Funny, how X can seem like the idol who loves this life the most when in reality she is hanging by a thread and music isn't her thing anymore

Aespa

X isn't the person she says she is. everything you know about her through the company is a masquerade, a mask to wear as an idol and not as a person. her personal life is not known in the public life

X has been playing this role of idol for so long that she often forgets about herself and about who she truly is.

X is waiting currently, waiting for a way out of her current situation

X is probably one of the female idols who has the most flings/one night stands with other idols

Gidle

X might have got pregnant at one point this year. this has been dealt with

X has yet to forget a lot of the awful memories that still haunt her.

X has probably the best outcome when it comes to being an idol. it seems like her future is bright and that her projects (solo and others that she will reveal) will all come to success

X might sem lazy sometimes but she has got the most motivation when it comes to being an idol

X is still in love with her ex from long time ago. to her it was the love of her life and despite having moving on, the feeling is dormant

Itzy

X has a lot of inspiration when it comes to her artistic side but the company doesnt really take her advices into consideration

X has made changes on herself in order for people to notice her more

X has been very serious about everything when it comes to her job, she has pushed the bad habits aside to focus plenty on herself and her professional domain

the company has been protecting X from a huge scandal

X is stuck in a cycle when it comes to her idol image. doesnt matter what she does, she wont ever erase what people know her for

Twice

X understand all the endgames of what an idol and what her contracts gives her which is the reason she wont ever stop it until JYP decides otherwise

X has been engaged for the past weeks

X self medicates a lot to control her own inner demons and issues

X might use pleasure as a way to cope with her pain and also in a way to feel validated by people

X's physical and mental health have been better compared to what it was a few years ago

X's is filthy rich, not because of her job but because of the dirt she has on people

X will be traveling for a project so keep your eyes open

the struggles that X is going through at the moment could shook the internet

X is also preparing for a solo

Le Sserafim

X is way more balanced lately for the past months, she isn't the same person she used to be. she has grown a lot

X has been having conflicts with the other members but also with the company staff. she has been too passive about it as well

X is in a loving relationship with a very well known idol. true ship?

X should be super careful with three things. 1- she shouldn't drive.., 2- she could get her ankle hurt during dancing practice or a performance, 3- her current path isnt the one for her

X is a very sweet girl but she is often mistaken due to her image and due to people's quick judgement

IVE

X will take action for something that Is very important. keep an eye open

x's influence on the other members is huge (I want to say that this is not Wonyoung). she could flip the whole group upside down if she wishes

X is devoted to her current partner, and she has been working to please them and not for some type of recognition

X's tea is a little too complex, too harsh. it involves a lot of endings that I shouldn't be explaining

X's mother has been the big influence in her life and actually taking in the reins to protect her daughter

X's seem to be having a lot of luck lately, especially when it comes to her career

[writteninlunarlight-years]

Pt1 Pt2 Pt3 Pt4

Turning this in to a mini series for my MBTI peoples

ESFJ (Consul) Reader

Alastor loves how responsible and like-minded you are. You are very set on bringing in those with mindsets similar to yours. You'll take the initiative and leave the demon to wonder who really wears the pants in the relationship.

After Adam attacks Alastor, you and he are really close. You admire how he would sacrifice himself for your friends, and he finds it courageous that you will stand before anything for them. Yet he would prefer you both to come out alive.

He feels terrible when you two fight because he knows it takes a toll on you far worse than on him. You like things to be good with your tight-nit bonds, but sometimes, he is very stuck in his ways, and it goes against your values, leading to some rough spots.

Alastor appreciates that even if you two are in a large fight, you are loyal to the bone. You will be right there defending him because he is your person. You don't let petty infighting prevent you from caring for him.

Alastor appreciates how hard you work for the hotel, but your overly structured routine sometimes gets in the way of other things. This can lead to both of you feeling unheard or overwhelmed.

Overall, all will be well if you two communicate well and stick by each other's sides. Try not to get too upset when things don't go your way, and Alastor will do his best to ensure you follow a decent routine.

ISTJ (Logistician) Reader

Alastor was a big fan of your respect for him and his title as overlord. Maybe not so much because you still held Charlie, especially Lucifer, over him. But the way you were punctual with him because he had higher authority meant a lot.

You are a sincere, open soul, which can sometimes cause conflict, but Alastor appreciates it. The way you are always bold and proud of what you did makes him feel like he can trust you a lot because you will always be there.

You are very punctual, and he admires that. However, if you fight with him because he changes your schedule, he is not happy about it. Sometimes, things pop up, and he tries to help you understand and work through these emotions you get.

Alastor adores that you want to help him with his massive work, but he worries that you put far too much on your plate by helping him and the others regularly. He would prefer it if you took less on your plate, allowing him to help you.

When it comes to boundaries, Alastor is quick to make sure everyone follows yours adequately. He doesn't want you overwhelmed or run down. However, you tend to break your boundaries for others, leaving him exhausted trying to clean everything up.

Overall, you two work well together. Your relationship is very hierarchy-based. He values your respect and kindness as much as you value his personality and drive. Keep open communication, and everything will work out.

ENTJ (Commander) Reader

You have one sure-fire way with words, which terrifies the Radio Demon. You can sometimes get almost anyone to join your cause, including him. You can speak nearly anything into existence, and people will believe it as fact.

Alastor has yet to see you indeed fail. When you fail, you return on your feet, reconstructing the narrative to be positive once more. It was almost too good that it made him doubt how in charge he was.

You collect souls like candy or bargain them back for people. Either way, you threaten Alastor, making him want you more. You can play mind games better than even he can, which could be a valuable asset.

You are exceptionally good at finding the talent of those around you and using them to your will. Something Alstor prided himself on as well. With you two together, it is like a powerhouse of soul bidding.

You are rude and abrasive when people don't meet your expectations. You may lead well, but you have difficulty congratulating the stragglers. This can sometimes affect Alastor, especially if you are on opposing teams.

Overall, try to be more in touch with your sensitive side. Not everything is with or against you. If you can do that, you and Alsator would be a giant power couple.

INTP (Logician) Reader

Alastor liked how unlike others you were. The lonesome nights fiddling in your room tweaking an experiment or idea you had to perfection. The way you were curious about it all fascinated him.

You always have interesting things to discuss with him. Though it took time for him to be allowed in your space and you in his, he doesn't regret it for the world. It is never a dull moment with you.

Alastor loves it when you ask him to hide out with you. You want to share your tinkering with him rather than with others. Charlie just wears you both out too fast. So, you can perfect your ultimate objectives by hiding away in many places in the hotel.

You hum with many possibilities, but nothing pleases and upsets Alastor more than your back-and-forth on many topics. He would like you to stick to one decision, but you play devil's advocate well, which allows you to bounce around, frustrating the man.

You sometimes come off as cold and unresponsive, though this trait is common in Alastor. He worries when you can not articulate or handle your emotions let alone when he opens up. However, you are a creative mastermind, and you pull yourself out of it by finding a way to make things work.

Overall, you two work well together. You offer Alastore the peace and quiet he desperately needs while you get to run through the millions of questions in your head alone. However, don't be fooled by his silence; he would love to hear everything you say.

[budd-ie]

Desperately need to break down two people and one cup of water because I have like 10 drafts about xianle trio that I Can't Post because they all feed off of conclusions from each of their answers, except we haven't established what those conclusions are yet. So this is where that starts.

I once had a wake up in a cold sweat realization (the first of many) that the three of them represent three different paths in their respective answers, and how these answers give us so much insight into who they really are and how they typically act. And I realize this is probably a very basic and prevalent thing (especially come book 3) but I haven't seen it broken down recently, so I'd like to. But mostly I need it as my context and support for my other future claims or else they might not make any sense haha. So I’ll be relating these answers directly to events in book 3. Let's get into it.

“Two walked the desert, about to die from thirst, and there was only one cup of water. The one who drinks lives, the one who doesn’t dies. If you were a god, who would you give that cup of water to— don’t speak yet, I’ll ask the other two and see how they answer.”

Mu Qing's answer:

“May I ask who those two people are, what their natures are like, and of their merits? A decision can only be made once all the details are known.”

Feng Xin's answer:

“I don’t know! Don’t ask me—tell them to decide amongst themselves!”

Xie Lian's answer:

“Give them another cup."

TLDR:

When faced with a choice such as this...

Xie Lian will try to save both parties at all costs, even if that cost is himself. His sense of justice is the strongest above all and believes that innocent people should never have to suffer.

Feng Xin will put someone else in charge of the choice and act on their behalf. He isn't as good at making decisions, and feels most comfortable standing behind someone else he trusts.

Mu Qing will choose whatever option brings the best/most desirable outcome that is within his control without sacrificing himself. He is a logical thinker above all else and is used to making moral sacrifices to find the optimal yet most realistic outcome of a situation.

(Book 3 and some book 6 spoilers ahead)

We know that Xie Lian's desire to expand the resource is beautiful but impossible, and we know that giving equal amounts of half the cup of water to both people will still leave them both as dead as not giving it at all. We also know that he learned his lesson the hard way and doesn't stop learning it even 800 years later. We know how Xianle fell and we know that it was doomed from the beginning; there was no saving it, but even if there was, he would have to choose between Xianle and Yong'an. Finally, we know that when he has nothing left to give, he will give himself up for the outcome he desires. We spend so much time with Xie Lian that I won't focus on trying to prove what's already been proven. Instead, I'll focus on the other two.

Mu Qing's answer is unpalatable to most people, because it sounds like he accepts being put in charge of answering the question "who deserves to live and who deserves to die?" It's easy to judge him for his willingness to make these kinds of sacrifices, but this is the exact nature of the question, and the exact situation they find themselves in so often. By both this answer and patterns within his actions, I think Mu Qing can best be described as an extremely logical thinker who will choose whatever option brings the best/most desirable outcome without sacrificing himself too far. That doesn't mean he'll never push his luck, but this is the algorithmic way we most often see him thinking.

By the terms of the riddle, the most logical option is that one person gets water and one person doesn’t, and the giver will decide who gets it to avoid conflict. And Mu Qing doesn’t choose randomly, either; he wants to choose based on their characters, their backgrounds, their merits, etc. So the other two may be treating everyone equally, but sometimes that’s just not within your control. Mu Qing is an incredibly logical person, so to optimize the good that can come from this action, he will make the choice. It’s not easy, and could end either way, but at least someone is guaranteed to live. In fact, this is the only outcome in which someone is guaranteed to live. I'll summarize some other examples of his thought process in the future, but I'll focus on the most relevant example for now.

In book 3, Mu Qing is the first one to suggest cursing Yong’an with human face disease in order to save Xianle. A "despicable" choice as they conclude, but Xie Lian, I will add, does thoroughly consider his suggestions before declining, and while the persuasion is ineffective, it isn't 100% ineffective. In the end though, Xie Lian is weighing the option of “people in the capital probably live and the people of Yong’an as well as the dead suffer for it” and he isn’t willing to make this bargain in the end. He doesn’t know if it could backfire and isn’t satisfied with the amount of bad that could come from it. Mu Qing, on the other hand, is adamant about this decision and gets frustrated that Xie Lian won’t make it. He's even excited about his answer, not because he wants people to die, but because he found themselves a viable way out. It feels so easy to him, because he’s weighing the net good of “we fucking live” and “we fucking die.” Turns out living is a lot more appealing than dying, especially for a character who canonically loves his life and is terrified of death. Isn’t this the same mindset as the rest of the common people?

I've established before that Xie Lian is not the common people. Growing up poor though, Mu Qing is like, common people extraordinaire. Unlike Xie Lian, he’s long since accepted that not everybody can be saved, not everybody can be placated, some people are good and nice and some people suck and are not. Mu Qing is used to making sacrifices for the greater good, ignoring morality to a digestible extent, because it’s something that common people have to do to get by. This situation reminds me of this quote from when the townsfolk are getting admonished for mutilating themselves to get rid of human face disease:

“Your Highness is invincible, so of course you'd call us foolish. But aren’t our conditions so desperate that we had no choice but to try foolish methods?!”

And maybe we fixate a lot on “not everybody can be saved” but I think what matters to Mu Qing is more that some people can be saved. Why are we dawdling doing good because it’s not enough good? Don’t we learn from this that just one person enough? Mu Qing understands that in order to have a chance at saving themselves a decision must be made, and he tries to make his point clear when he says the following:

“Before they reach their bad end, we will have already perished! You don’t have a third path and there is no second cup of water. Wake up, Your Highness! You’re running out of time.”

The amount of suffering the common people have endured until now allows the average person to surpass the moral debacle and choose life above all else. Why did Xie Lian try to steal during his first banishment? Because he was so desperate to save himself and his family that morality became the lesser merit. When faced with the threat of human face disease and the solution of killing just one person to save themselves, the people who stab Xie Lian live, and the one who refuses the decision dies a horrible death. Does Mu Qing make a little more sense now? He saw not only a way to survive, but the expected solution to the problem, and he jumped at it. We as the audience can fixate on the moral implications of his decisions because we aren’t the ones making the decisions, nor are we affected by either outcome.

Speaking of a person not making decisions, this is where Feng Xin becomes relevant. His answer is to make no decision at all, leave it up to them to decide who drinks and who doesn't. While he's absolved from the moral quandary, this path doesn't really solve anything. There might be a chance where they choose peacefully who should drink, but it's much more realistic to expect them to slaughter each other over the resource before either of them have the chance to drink it.

So when faced with a major decision like this, what is Feng Xin most likely to do?

Entrust it to someone else, like Xie Lian.

As much as I love him, our poor boy's arrows are a bit sharper than he is. What’s he doing while Xie Lian and Mu Qing talk about curses?

At first, Feng Xin had listened to their argument glumly, and because he couldn’t contribute any better ideas, he didn’t join in.

Not a whole lot. Actually, he stands silently until Mu Qing insults Xie Lian. After that, he shoves Mu Qing back and suddenly starts going off on him, saying things like

“With an apathetic person like him, you don’t usually see any sign that he actually cares about the Kingdom of Xianle. But now suddenly he’s anxious?”

and especially:

“You really think I can’t tell that you think His Highness is a fool? I can tolerate your sarcasm and those rolling eyes, I can tolerate you always standing where you shouldn’t in the Upper Court. You like to show off and it’s hardly the first time you’ve pulled this shit, so fine, go show off, you’re not good enough to wow the heavens anyway. His Highness doesn’t mind, so I don’t give a shit either. But since you’re gonna cross the line, I’m not gonna hold back. Listen up! I’m not surprised you’d leap at the chance to use despicable means, but His Highness is His Highness—no matter what he decides, you better respect it. Don’t you dare be so critical, and don’t forget who the fuck you are!”

This is only an excerpt of the rant because the first part isn't as relevant but this whole scene is so crazy. Crazy because it's so raw (that last line is so jaw dropping to me like actually. If someone said all that to me I’d go rogue) and also because it tells us so much about them.

First, "despicable" is actually a word Xie Lian used earlier when he said the following:

“Absolutely not! Don’t forget what we called them when they attacked the innocent civilians of the capital: despicable. If we do the same thing, won’t we become just as despicable? How would we be any different?”

Which means this isn't completely Feng Xin's own judgment. Right now, he's just using Xie Lian's opinion as an in to justify his own personal rage. Xie Lian isn't even calling Mu Qing despicable; he fully believes in Mu Qing, understands how he came to his conclusion, and doesn't blame him for having a temper (he already knows he's sensitive and prone to it, he defends him saying he’s “just anxious over the current situation”). While we do know it definitely reflects Feng Xin's moral opinion on attacking innocents (“If it really was them, then I’ll lose respect for them. Fight honestly on the battlefield if you have the ability; don’t use shady tricks to harm innocent civilians!”), it's less reflective of his intentions in this specific instance.

Second, this whole rant is fueled by nothing but pent up rage that was sparked by Mu Qing insulting Xie Lian, giving him a hard time, and going against his decision. Feng Xin judges him hard for his "despicable" choice, but Feng Xin doesn't even have any other opinions on how to solve the actual problem at hand. His opinion is whatever Xie Lian decides, for his highness is so smart and virtuous, clearly that must be the right one, especially when compared to that of a humble servant.

But what would Feng Xin do if Xie Lian decided Mu Qing was right? What if Xie Lian decided that they desperately needed to curse all Yong'an citizens to die so Xianle might be able to live? Would this still be a despicable decision to Feng Xin if Xie Lian decided it wasn't so bad? I have reason to believe that his sense of morality, though great, may be slightly lesser than his sense of loyalty (assuming the person he is loyal to is virtuous and acceptable to him, such is Xie Lian). This is supported by how in the revised book 6 scene, Feng Xin doesn’t leave because he’s questioning Xie Lian’s morality, he leaves because Xie Lian relieves him of his duty and he obeys the order. He’s surprised when this happens and seems hesitant, despite it all. While we don’t really have any specific instance testing this hypothetical, my hypothesis is that any moral complications he could have would come after acting on his highness's word, and if Xie Lian said this was the right choice, he would rationalize it (I also think there’s a graph with an intersection between his morality and loyalty after which morality will start surpassing loyalty when the situation is pushed far enough to warrant it). In any case, the consequences of their actions will not fall on Feng Xin's shoulders, so he doesn't think too hard about the implications of the actions, he just excels at following orders from the boss; that's why its so easy for him to make these judgments.

I also think this explains the way he acts during book 1 where he always looks like he has something to say and never chooses to, always looking just a little lost at what he’s supposed to be doing. He’s given a choice of talk to Xie Lian or not talk to him, but he genuinely doesn’t know what he’s supposed to do and can’t figure it out on his own, so he chooses the safe option of doing nothing. He’s always looked towards Xie Lian to make decisions, but he doesn’t have that anymore. We actually see him start getting more confident in decision making as the book goes on, like when he congratulated him for his 3000 lanterns (I like how he doesn’t question where they came from though!).

Anyways, I forgot how important book 3 was for characterization of these three because everything they do can be drawn back here. The number one reason I like this story is the way every single character is so individual and has very specific motivations and personalities that can and will clash in very specific ways with other characters, which is how a lot of the conflicts arise in the first place (instead of throwing people at a plot and hoping they can carry it). It makes it so interesting when you know why they act the way they do. Also, this isn't a complete character summary by any means, there’s obviously more to these fellas that I didn’t talk about. I can think of other instances that support these conclusions, but because this is already such a long post maybe I'll make a masterlist or something and link them when I finish them (thanks!)

[neuroticbookworm]

Another Thai BL, another Asian parent-child conflict that enrages the audience and yet, is extremely nuanced. I’m gonna try and speak on it as an Asian kid who grew up in the East, but currently lives in the West, carrying complicated feelings on the Asian parenting I received.

I’m seeing a good discourse in the tags from @lurkingshan, @respectthepetty, @bengiyo, @heretherebedork and @williamrikers, among others, on the hypocrisy of a dad who hit his son in anger and is now lecturing him on the importance of controlling one’s actions when angry. I agree with everyone that the dad is being a hypocritical piece of shit. But I do not think that this is a failure in the writing of the show. Quite the opposite, actually. Because of how Ten responds and acts in the face of this hypocrisy.

Ten comes across as belligerent and confrontational in every interaction he has had with his dad, but it is never uncalled for, and he never seeks it out himself. He tries to stay out of his dad and his stepmom/his dad’s girlfriend’s way as much as possible, and only responds in a defensive manner when provoked. And in today’s episode, he even kept himself open enough in the conversation with his dad, despite his anger, to concede and accept a very good point when raised. Ten understands his dad’s hypocrisy but refuses to stoop to the same level of pettiness because he knows being a good partner and a good friend is more important than being right. This is a mark of excellent writing, in my opinion. The main character is fiercely loyal to his partner and his friends and does not let his baggage with his dad cloud his course of action.

I also see calls for an apology from the dad already brewing in the fandom. And I understand the instinct to want that. It is always so satisfying when mistreated children finally get the apology that’s been long overdue. But it’s rarely this simple in an Asian household. Times are changing faster than most people can in a lifetime, and there are systemic, cultural flaws in how an Asian society understands and teaches parenting. And if we factor in the social, economic, religious lines that heavily influence how an Asian person forms their social circle, it would’ve left these parents with little to no peers who can tell them what they’re doing is wrong. Parents striking their kids is clearly considered evil nowadays, but only a few years ago, it would’ve been a perfectly acceptable response to control a bratty child, on and off screen (and it still is in some Asian cultures).

Now, NONE of what I said above is an excuse to write off the behavior of Ten’s dad as acceptable, just because it’s very Asian. As an Asian who grew up in the East, the demand for an apology does not particularly resonate with me, because Ten and his dad both know that their problems are not gonna go away as soon as Ten’s dad apologizes. Because:

If Ten starts demanding an apology for every shitty thing his dad has ever done, where should he stop? Should he demand an apology for the time his dad probably struck him as a kid when he was trying to get him to memorize multiplication tables, as is wont of every Asian parent ever (it is such an ubiquitous experience to Asian kids everywhere that there are reels with millions of views on IG, referencing this experience. Does this mean every Asian parent is evil and must be put on trial by their kids? Holy moly, think of all the money therapists would make if every Asian kid in the world decided to call out their parents on their shit. Entire economies would crumble to dust from the sudden disruption in cashflow.)

Is an apology going to comfort Ten? Asian parenting warps the sense of self of both the parents and the kids, because of the levels of abject sacrifice involved in it. It is extremely possible that Ten’s dad had worked day and night to provide well for his family, for his son, before Ten’s mom fell ill. It’s the same choice he made for his wife, but in this case, it paid off, because now Ten is financially well taken care of, and he is privileged enough to pursue a career in medicine. If Ten demands an apology from his dad for not being there when his mom was dying, do we know for sure that when he gets that apology, his mind won’t conflate the sacrifices his dad made for him, thus making him feel guilty for forcing someone who clearly cared about him enough to work hard for him, into defeat (look at this rich soup of Asian parenting misery, yum yum yum. I know it’s delicious because I’m paying my therapist weekly to make the broth less spicy).

The dialogue in the show whenever Ten’s mom is brought up and discussed is always very carefully worded:

Not “because you did not act”, but “because you took so long to act”. Looks like Ten’s dad made a choice that ultimately did not pay off. He cared, and he wanted to do something to save his wife, but whatever he chose to do ultimately did not help. And now she is dead and he has managed to not help and comfort his wife in her final days AND unwittingly traumatize his son with his absence. The show has painted this storyline with enough nuance that I don’t believe we are meant to read Ten’s dad as a simple villain, but rather a father who does care but has made some serious mistakes. This situation is so emotionally complicated and realistically, it’s gonna take years for both of them to find a middle ground. Ten is gonna have to grow up and make a few mistakes of his own in life to develop proper empathy for his dad, and that’s gonna put a couple things into perspective for him (I’m not saying Ten is bound to make mistakes because he is bad. He is going to because shit happens in life and human beings always do better in hindsight than in the moment). And the dad is gonna have to grow old and let his aging body humble him a little and shrink his ego enough to see that he had failed his son by not being emotionally available to deal with their trauma, together.

I’ve been watching Kim’s Convenience, a Canadian sitcom that follows a Korean-Canadian family and their shenanigans. I’m only on S04E02, but there is a father-son conflict at the centre of this show that is still not directly addressed by both the dad and the son. It’s been years (almost a decade, I think) since the son has been driven out of his home by his dad for a dumb mistake he made as a teen. And the way the show works on it is so infuriating, because it is so Asian. It is rarely addressed aloud in the presence of the dad or the son, lest it leads to anger and screaming and storming off. The path to reconciliation is built with mom calling her son for help to fix something in their home because his dad is too stubborn to ask for it. With the son visiting the hospital when the dad had to undergo surgery, and having their first real conversation in years which the dad forgets after waking up from the influence of pain drugs. With the daughter’s old phone passed down to the dad with her brother’s number on it, which leads to them texting each other. It is all extra frustrating for me because I’m extremely straightforward in my conversations with my parents. I do not like ambiguous endings to verbal conflicts because they are a ticking time bomb and I do not have the capacity to forget its existence and let it tick away in the background. But, I understand it when my friends, and Asian characters in TV shows, don’t want to force things out in the open if it can be swept under the rug for the time being, because peace of mind in Asian households is fleeting and you would be wise to take what you get.

Good TV shows can best serve their audience when they serve their characters, and stay true to the experiences of the people they are trying to represent. My teen ass was regularly shocked, appalled and intrigued by the sexual liberation promised by Western media I consumed while I was in school and college. I was surrounded by a sexually repressed society that was convinced that the only moral way to enjoy pleasure was after marriage with your partner. And very predictably, this means a lot of dead bedrooms, unhappy marriages and kids growing up with no real understanding of what romantic love looks like. I would’ve never had the courage to move my entire life to the West, if the Western media I watched had not represented its people in all their messy, horny glory, albeit with a rose-tinted lens on gender, race and sexuality.

Some Asian parents in media need to fall at the feet of their children and apologize. I remember being absolutely fucking enraged while @lurkingshan and I watched Double Savage at the behest of our friend @waitmyturtles, and in the finale, Korn was the one who fell at the feet of his absolute piece of shit of a dad to apologize for FUCKING NOTHING. And after Shan and I were done surviving that show, I remember telling my friends that most Asian media does not have strong writing whenever Asian children need to defy their shitty parents and come to terms with their destructive parenting, because chances are, most Asian creators would not have successfully done it. Hence, intergenerational trauma (gasp! It’s all connected!).

So. I would never demand to see Ten’s dad apologize to him to consider Cooking Crush a successful show, because that is not the cultural context this story operates in. Would I enjoy it if he does? Hell yes. Would I be mad if he does not? No, because Ten is proving him wrong time and again, and that’s a constant reminder from the narrative of who is in the right.

[iwriteandiamnosy]

Why Farcille isn't canon and it's not a bad thing part 3

The third part!!!

CONTAINS SPOILER FROM MANGA AND ANIME

(Part 1)

(Part 2)

Falin attraction to Marcille is so obvious, the hand grab on episode 12, the fact that as a little kid she brought Marcille berries and flower, it reminds me of a little bird courting. In their official art, they are always close, and no, not in a friend way, and they look at each other, no, not in a friend way.

She is willing to sacrifice her own freedom for Marcille and Laios, doing something illegal, and the safety of an eventual person if the teleportation goes bad (and I love that Marcille is the same, illegal lesbians).

Also the conflicted feeling that she has when Marcille calls her face cute and she is conflicted about it, because she doesn't like the redness of her face, but she likes that Marcille is complementing her (and also the thing that she isn't willing to tell Marcille that she is insecure about this, is a remark of her "passive" nature). At the same time, spending time with your "friend" asking her to go out to do a thing she likes, seems like a teenage queer trope to me (from personal experience lol). Also notice how Marcille becomes so protective over her when Falin said something about Laios that made her feel bad (protective friend and gf).

She can't hold a grudge, she seems like she doesn't care (she still writes to her parents, she "didn't care" or "didn't see" when people of her village mistreated her, ditto on the school of magic, as if, this passiveness is a way to protect herself, in opposite of Laios that reacts).

Also I think that her reason of not trying to flirt with Marcille is because she is shy, but because that would imply being herself, and she isn't capable of that yet. They like each other, but need to resolve their problems to be with one another. IMAGINE THE SLOW BURN WHILE THEY GROW WITH EACH OTHER. Thank you for listening to my Ted Talk.

I am obsessed with them, I am starting to draw just to draw them.

I own none of the images, sorry for any grammatical errors :)

[wutheringskies]

that utterly disgusting post comparing Wei Wuxian not giving up Wen (dogs) and Jiang Cheng giving up his 3 dogs, and how, he's always been in the position of "giving."

NO.

All the people saying in the tags they are "true brothers," absolutely not. To fulfil your status quo siblings, tsundere character and ship, you completely dismiss the entire story.

1. Jiang Cheng has no dog loving tendencies.

2. The scene of giving his dogs up presents an important theme.

Jiang Fengmian tries to get Wei Ying adjusted to the dogs, but he absolutely cannot, so they are made to leave; Jiang Cheng as a child is understandably upset about losing his dogs. To add on, his dad lifts Wei Ying up and Jiang Cheng kicks Wei Wuxian out, scares him with dogs, but feels like he would get into trouble, so he tells his sister, tries to find him, gets injured, and Wei Wuxian promises he won't tell anyone that JC kicked him out; and then, the dogs are gone, but now Jiang Cheng has his favourite subordinate.

What strikes me is that Jiang Cheng, even as a child, holds no true empathy.

- Wei Wuxian has no control over what he absolutely cannot stand; whether it be dogs or injustice. It's integral to his character.

- Wei Wuxian has no control over who lifts him up, loves him, or praises him. None of these actions are meant to be targeted at Jiang Cheng. Yet throughout the plot we see JC losing his mind when someone approaches WWX with positive intentions or says good things about him.

- JC kicked WWX out and scared him with his worst fear; this is the parallel you are meant to be drawing; just like Jiang Cheng threw him out then, Jiang Cheng threw him out now (leaving the Wens to die is not an option.)

- Jiang Cheng worries that he would be admonished by his father which is why he goes to find WWX, but gets injured in the way.

such a pathetic character honestly. the reason he is still alive is because of the former - he fears authority. Killing demonic cultivators? But let Xue Yang go! Why? He's protected by the Jins. Don't fight LWJ because he's powerful.

and the finding WWX, trying to help WWX once but getting injured... lack of capability.

- WWX promising not to tell anyone; and that's it. that's the basis of their relationship. it's one sided as hell. they're not brothers. it's basically abuse. if you've read the book, you would know.

"from Jiang Cheng's perspective" Jiang Cheng doesn't matter! He will always be beneath Wei Wuxian; his whole purpose is to be a red warning sign; Wei Wuxian can kill 50 of Jiang Chengs for all I know; there is no need to dive deeper with your biased, limited knowledge of Jiang Cheng.

- They are not brothers. They are martial brothers. Raised in the same sect and practicing the same cultivation style.

- There's a clear distinction of subordinate vs superior; master vs slave; owner and his killing dog. The point of conflict arises when the dog acts without his master's commands to save common people. It doesn't stem from misunderstanding or any such thing like that - it's out there. Wei Wuxian knows their moral ideologies don't align. He had hoped Jiang Cheng, if not take the Wens into Yunmeng, would at least, let him be. But when the matter is of "Kill them, or I will not stand by you."

Wei Wuxian leaves the sect; it is NOT Jiang Cheng's sacrifice. It is not hurting Jiang Cheng. The most hurt it causes is to Wei Wuxian; who ultimately had to make the choice.

Jiang Cheng is hurt? Oh, is it because Wei Wuxian chose the moral high-ground over playing his lapdog? Jiang Cheng must be furious.

Also, "Jiang Cheng has given and given" - NO.

- Wei Wuxian comes to Lotus Pier and hangs out with friendless, bitter, unloved child Jiang Cheng, matches his competitiveness head on head, coaxes him to talk to people, etc. Accepts all the endlessly bitter taunts and throws out a few in return. Surpasses him in abilities, practices together. They're boys.

- Does all his bidding and requests in Cloud Recessses to do this or that. Jiang Cheng does carry him, when they are 15.

- In Xuanwu Cave, Jiang Cheng also attacked the Wens after Wei Wuxian got burnt; Wei Wuxian was the reason he was able to live. He did travel and ask for aid. But Wei Wuxian also did allow himself to become a bait and usher people out stuck in a cave with a 400 year old monster... what's not clicking?

- and after the fall of lotus pier he strangles Wei Wuxian and hits him, gets done with life, thinks "I'll die heroically" and also sort of out of guilt and remnant care for Wei Wuxian, but instead loses his core.

And then?

Then what? That is it. That's really it for their relationship being giving on Jiang Cheng's side. It died when Lotus Pier did. Yet:

- Wei Wuxian knowingly, consciously gave up his core for the guy who strangled him twice in the past 50 hours or so.

- Without even a core, fought in the war alongside the Jiangs, earned a lot of report; the sunshot campaign is a small arc text wise in the book, yet there are at least three mentions of Wei Wuxian being the reason behind why the Jiangs are extremely powerful.

- Even afterwards acts on JC's orders in the Phoenix Mountain Hunt.

- Keeps protecting Jiang Cheng's name by ensuring it's not about Jiang Cheng or "don't bring him into this."

- Doesn't even attack the Jiangs in nightless city

- JC can enter the barriers still

- even back to life he just wants to get away and not harm him, unlike JC

so basically, fuck Jiang Cheng and more specifically please touch grass. it's one thing to like a character. it's another to dehumanize a bunch of people rescued from labour camp prison where they were dealing with xianxia level of abuse as dogs and justify a powerful clan leader not helping them, especially when he owes them, to show how he once lost his dogs.

Like that is vile.

[thoscheienjoyer]

You guys really seem to like my threegado stories, so here's another, I call it 'The Sacrifice'

The Doctor and Jo had faced one hardship after hardship in these past few weeks, the adventures were just too much, so the Doctor decided it was time for a well-deserved break. No aliens, no inter-dimensional threats, just a simple trip the old-fashioned way. Through UNIT’s connections, they secured a private plane for their peaceful getaway.

“Are you sure this will be relaxing, Doctor?” Jo asked in a lighthearted manner, pretending to be overly skeptical, but she did trust the man more than anyone.

The Doctor nodded, “Quite sure, Jo, we'll arrive at our destination in just a few hours”

Settling into their seats, the Doctor fell into a light nap while Jo immersed herself in a book. The calm didn’t last long. As the plane began to shake violently the Doctor jolted awake.

“What’s happening?” his companion asked, heavily concerned for their safety as she looked around frantically for some sort of cause.

Before the Doctor could speak, a sinister yet familiar voice crackled over the intercom. “Ah, Doctor, Jo. So glad you could join me.”

“The Master,” the Doctor muttered and stood. If course.

“Indeed. I’m your pilot for this little excursion,” the Master continued playfully. “The plane is going to crash, and I’ve taken the liberty of packing two parachutes. Unfortunately, there are three of us. Take your pick, Doctor." They could feel the smile.

They horrified looks and the Master stepped out with the parachutes as promised. “You see, Doctor, this is where we differ, I would simply leave both of you, but you? Either admit you and me are worth more than one measly human, or save the innocent and punish the villian. I know you’ll make the ‘right’ choice.”

The decision was already made. “I won’t sacrifice Jo, and I won’t sacrifice you either.”

His smirk faded. “Doctor, what are you saying?”

“Jo and you will live.”

Jo grabbed the Doctor’s arm. “No! Doctor, you can’t!”

He turned to her, his expression gentle but firm as he ran a hand through her hair in a way that could almost be seen as parental. “Jo, if I let someone die because they’ve done bad things, I’m no better than they are. We don’t let people die, no matter who they are.”

Jo nodded but tears streamed down her face “But you’re letting yourself die!” she cried.

The Master interrupted, his voice dripping with disdain for the emotional display. “Why would you risk yourself for a human, Doctor? You’re far more important.”

His old friend softly met his gaze. “I won’t let an innocent die, Master. It doesn't matter who I am."

The Master was frustrated and angry at the thought, he gestured to the other timelord. “The universe needs you Doctor, you know that."

The man's resolve remained unshaken. “I won’t compromise my morals.”

For a moment, the Master seemed conflicted. Then, he thrust the parachutes at the Doctor and Jo. “Take them.”

The Doctor's eyes widened and he was momentarily stunned, but he quickly tried to regain his composure. As the Master assumed the decision was final, the Doctor grabbed him, pulling him towards the door. “What are you doing?!”

“We’re jumping together.” the Doctor would not take no for an answer. “Jo, follow us!”

Jo, clutching her parachute, nodded and jumped. The Doctor and the Master followed, sharing one parachute. As they fell, the Master continued to argue. “You could have killed us both with the extra weight! Why would you save me you fool?!”

The Doctor's eyes were full of compassion as he held his enemy so he wouldn't fall. “You may be my enemy, Master, but you’re still my oldest friend.”

The Master was silent, his mind reeling. His Doctor’s.. No, his Theta's unwavering morals, his refusal to let anyone die, even him, and his willingness to save even his greatest adversary—it was confounding. The Master felt a strange, uncomfortable emotion stirring within him as they descended safely to the ground.

Jo landed nearby and shook her head. “He’s just going to cause more trouble.”

The rouge timelord, still grappling with the Doctor’s actions, didn't even notice how he hadn't let go of him yet, he clung like they were still falling and the Doctor didn't stop him. They're always clinging to each other in different ways.

The Doctor just smiled warmly with a nod, like he's accepted this fact. “I know. But for now, let’s get to safety.”

He let go to walk away from the crash site and the Master couldn’t understand the feeling of being cared for by someone he considered an enemy. The Doctor’s commitment to his principles had foiled his scheme and left him questioning everything.

[silverbladexyz]

Hi love! How are you? How have you been? Sorry for bothering, can I request Chuuya boyfriend headcanons please?

Thank you! Have a nice day/night!! 💞💞

Hiiii I'm alright, just kind of stressed recently because of life :') but I'm surviving! How about you?

The image does not belong to me. It belongs to it's original owner.

TW: Mentions of death, violence, slight suggestiveness. Gender neutral reader

Chuuya boyfriend headcanons

-Let's see... to win Chuuya's love and trust is no easy feat. To start off with, he's a Port Mafia executive, which means that he barely has any time for friendships, let alone love. And to top it all off, he himself has lost too many people in his life, something which made him put up all those walls around himself in fear of losing someone else again

-Be prepared for a lot of denial and internal conflict once he realises his feelings for you. Chuuya is not one that is entirely in tune with his emotions, and to express what he is feeling proves to be an even harder feat for him. He might give shorter and more curt answers back to you, and might even distance himself from you if he's overwhelmed with this foreign feeling called 'love'

-But once you do get into a relationship with him, it is one full of passion and sacrifices. Chuuya's loyalty knows no bounds, and trust me when I say that he will commit everything to you. He holds onto you like you were something that could be blown away from him by a mere breeze, yet he holds you as if you were a fragile treasure, one so hardly acquired and easily lost

-He is quite protective. Desperate to not lose you, he will take extra measures to ensure that you are safe whenever he is not around you. Whether you were another Mafia executive or just a normal civilian, Chuuya will always make sure that another Mafia member was around your area should you run into trouble when he was not there

-It will take Chuuya a while to get used to being in a relationship with you. He's still learning, so he would really appreciate it if you told him what he could improve on or what your opinion on some of his actions in the relationship was. He wants to be the perfect boyfriend for you, and he will try his absolute hardest to learn and make himself someone deserving of your love and attention. Please assure him that he is enough already

-Affection isn't something he is used to as well. Even his friends in the Mafia only did as far as to give him a pat on his shoulder, or even a hug in the rarest of instances. So if you suddenly give him a kiss out of nowhere, or brush your fingers against his lovingly, he will freeze a little bit before slowly reciprocating it. But over time, he does become more comfortable with affection, as long as you don't overdo it

-Now his love language would either be acts of service or quality time. Chuuya isn't the best at words or affection, and he does get you gifts every now and then, but since this relationship is so foreign for him it would take a while for him to use other ways to show his love for you. He would be more than happy to learn how to tell you 'I love you' through actions and thoughts

-Chuuya would definitely be a lot more gentle and vulnerable in a relationship. He trusts you completely, and he isn't one to hide secrets from you as he values honesty. While he may be brash and temperamental, he is also perfectly capable of showing that soft side he locks away in himself, and he shows it to you and you only

-Further on into the relationship, be prepared for Chuuya to tell you everything. His past, his insecurities, his trauma, everything. He doesn't expect you to comfort him or help him, he just wants someone whom he can talk to and not worry about being betrayed or judged. So when you hugged him and assure him of how strong he was and how lucky you were to have him, it's from there on that Chuuya appreciates you the most he has ever appreciated you before

-Chuuya has a few hobbies that he likes to do in his free time, but he is interested in your hobbies as well, and often does them with you as he gets to spend more time with his beloved. His favourite things to do with you include taking you on motorcycle rides, have friendly sparring matches with you, wine-tasting, and even just shopping for exquisite and high-end clothes. He'd involuntarily spoil you since he has a lot of money, but he doesn't mind it if you spoil him too

-Kissing was a whole new experience. He will start off a bit rough and awkward at first, so it is mostly up to you to guide him with small movements of your lips and fleeting touches with your fingertips. Chuuya is surprised at how much he likes to kiss you, and you do note that his kisses do eventually get a bit softer as time goes on

-But if you wanted to make out with him? He's down for it and will mostly take the lead. His hands will grip you firmly but gently on your waist as he dominates the kiss. Spice it up a little by fighting back or by teasingly running your fingers along some more of his sensitive spots on his neck. However, he will get you back for it

-Love him, and he will love you back infinite times more than your love for him. Chuuya Nakahara is but a man; a man who has had everyone leave him; a man who doesn't let his past define who he is. His love for you will forever burn brighter than the flames of passion that consume his very being

So I feel like this was more deeper and serious than all my other posts. Chuuya to me is such a complex and deep character and it gives me a rare sense of thrill to write for him, especially when I get to analyse the other parts of his character that is not explicitly shown or told.

@circinuus @nekokinax @xxsigmakinniexx @xxelfmamaxx @yuugen-benni @ashthemadwriter @lakeside-paradise @catzlivedforbsd @sariel626 @yukitomybeloved @irethepotato @voyagewiththesatan @arisu-chan4646 @chuuyas-beloved

[deathrooteater]

A while ago, I saw a post lambasting the OST for Elden Ring's final boss, comparing it unfavorably to Gwyn's theme. Iirc, the post said that Gwyn's theme was powerful for its themes, while the Final Battle was just a rehash of the main theme, with no power behind it beyond being bombastic.

Personally, I feel like the person who made that post missed the point of the themes each song has.

To put it simply, Dark Souls and Elden Ring (to me) cover similar topics, but from opposite perspectives.

Where Dark Souls says "Everything ends, and that's something to be cherished, not something to despair over", Elden Ring says "There are no endings, only new beginnings".

And the music of their final fights reflects that.

Gwyn and Aldia's themes are both sad pieces, one a piano solo that, as another post said, sounds almost like a funeral piece, and the other is almost mystical, with a woman wailing and more piano. Soul of Cinder seems to break the whole thing a bit, but it also fits: it starts bombastic, with heavy brass, but soon turns to the sad piece that is Gwyn, Lord of Cinder. Just like how the world of Dark Souls started with violence and war, and ended after all the violence was done, either after one last useless sacrifice, after two people mercy killed a dying world, or through a new beginning, too ambiguous to tell if it's a good or bad thing. It is sad music because the world of Dark Souls is about to die/be reborn, and it is afraid of what's to come.

Just like Gwyn feared the Dark, the world of Dark Souls fears Change.

Elden Ring, by contrast, has violence as a central topic, through Godfrey, Marika, Radagon, etc. And yet, there is hope for better things; to turn a new page. The Final Battle starts very bombastic, and yet, like Soul of Cinder, it also turns calm after the Elden Beast appears. But it is not a sad piece, it simply calms down after the bombastic piece that was before. Which also reflects Radagon and the Elden Beast.

Radagon brought war to Liurnia, and even beyond that, he's likely conflicted over everything he's done in the name of the Golden Order. His piece reflects that turmoil and violence his life is filled by.

By contrast, the Elden Beast is at the top of the food chain of the Lands Between. With very few exceptions, it has never had to bring the pain itself, only direct others to do so. Further, while the Beast likely has its own issues (what with possibly being abandoned by the Greater Will), it's very probable it doesn't feel an ounce of remorse for all of the pain it has indirectly caused. Thus, its part is calmer.

Further, that calm part is, although sad, calm (forgive the repetition). It is the world of Elden Ring accepting the change the Beast's death will bring, rather than fearing it, even if it is saddened that things have to change.

I don't really know where I was going with this, but I still fully believe Gwyn, Lord of Cinder/Aldia, Scholar of the First Sin/Soul of Cinder and the Final Battle are all songs that fully deserve all the praise, and have much more meaning than just being "a rehash of the menu theme".

[azure-firecracker]

ATLA Live Action Episode 6: Overall Thoughts.

I have mixed feelings about this one. It made the least changes from the original, which means I have nothing really to commend it on that the original didn’t already do, but at the same time, I don’t have anything to complain about either. In isolation, it is a very good episode of television. In isolation, it’s the best episode yet, but I have a harder time crediting it because most of the good stuff in here is from the original. Onto the specifics:

This episode continued the trend I don’t love of Aang being just a vessel for cliché heroic lines. I get that the show is supposed to have a more mature tone, and maybe some of Aang’s more childish traits wouldn’t have translated well, but they could have at least put SOMETHING interesting in there.

In terms of the Aang/Roku scene, I didn’t love it. I don’t like this “the avatar must not have friends” dilemma the show is pushing. It’s tired. We’ve seen it in every fantasy show. A variation of this could work as part of Aang’s work, but it doesn’t work as his central conflict. It’s too overdone.

Also, Katara wasn’t in this episode, so I couldn’t get annoyed at them for butchering her character. Definite plus.

Another plus was June! Didn’t love her flirting with Iroh but she was fun and entertaining. Arden Cho did a wonderful job. I hope they bring her back more, she’d be a great recurring fun character to have around.

I did love all the stuff with Zuko. I loved the juxtaposition between younger, idealistic, naive Zuko and current, hardened Zuko. Even though live action Zuko is softer than animated Zuko, this episode really did a good job of showing how he has been hardened by his experiences, relative to what he once was. I liked his conversation with Aang, and how the two clearly have a connection despite their circumstances. I generally like it when those types of stories are played out in a non-romantic context because it’s so rare. A lot of the lines between them were a bit cliché, but they worked (except for the line going right into the flashback where Aang was like “You can’t have always been this way. That one was a little heavy handed).

In terms of the flashback itself:

Younger Zuko seems softer and more naive than animated Zuko, which works with the way we see Zuko here. He had a lot of good lines, especially his line about giving the weak a chance. I know some people didn’t like that he fought back against Ozai in the Agni Kai, but to me it worked. It showed that he was still trying to please his father, and just how willing he was to sacrifice his morals to do it (though not willing enough for Ozai).

Speaking of Ozai, I find it interesting how he’s portrayed here. The original show portrayed him as very uncaring, willing to banish Zuko for disobedience but not really caring if he came back. Here it almost seems like he genuinely thinks this is good parenting, like he genuinely believes this will make Zuko stronger. Obviously he’s still horrible and abusive, but I actually think it works better than the original. It goes hand in hand with how he seems to really think he’s doing the right thing for the world with the FN (because newsflash…that’s what imperialism is!) A villain who really thinks they’re right is always more interesting than one who just wants power and is horrible. I think they could do interesting things with him and I’m intrigued.

Iroh was really sweet in this episode. I liked that he tried to stop Ozai from having the Agni Kai, and that he was with Zuko afterwards. It always puzzled me why he didn’t do that in the first place, and while Iroh having flaws makes sense (he should have flaws!) that particular flaw didn’t seem right, so I liked that addition.

And rounding out the fire family flashback (haha alliteration!) we have Azula. She didn’t really do anything here but the bangs were a great choice! I found it a bit weird that the camera kept zooming in on her expression during Zuko’s burning, but her expression was very neutral. It’s another change I like from the original. I think Azula smiling in the original works and is super interesting, but this show is clearly taking steps to make her more humanized right off the bat, which I appreciate as an Azula stan who has to deal with…many people who don’t see her as human. I’m not sure what to make of her expression, but I did notice that it’s the same one she used when Ozai burned the spy in episode 3 (good job Lizzy Yu!) It seems like a mix of fear and joy and detachment, like she’s trying to relish it but also she knows it could happen to her, but she doesn’t want to admit that, and also she just wants to detach from what’s happening. It can be interpreted in many ways!

One minor thing: I didn’t like that this Agni Kai was outside. The really dark, all red, fiery throne room looked a lot more menacing. And they literally already have that set! Having it outside made it look so much more mundane.

Back to the present:

Blue Spirit escape sequence was great! Again, basically torn from the original so no surprise there. I appreciate that they didn’t feel the need to change everything, and the mask looked great. I also loved Iroh’s last line about the mask being the real you. That’s a theme that could come back for a number of characters (Aang, Zuko, Katara, Azula, Mai and Ty Lee…) And I did get this spoiled, but the addition of Zuko’s crew being the 41st was great. Lovely. Super sweet. A wonderful way to pull at the heartstrings.

I’ll give this episode a 9/10. A very strong episode of television, but I can’t give it a 10 because the strongest stuff is plucked from the OG.

[horizon-verizon]

They are going to push this dumb Rhaenicent plot line to no end. Alicent is not even the queen anymore yet all the marketing pushing her as such. Her inconsistent writing makes her one of the goofiest characters on the show. So legit what is she even going to do this season ? Sulk, be sad, sulk, be sad, maybe make Blood & Cheese probaly more about her grief than Helaena ? She isn’t politically smart in the slightest no matter how much the actors try to make her seem she’s wiser than she actually is. Alicent spent years believing Rhaenyra is going to slaughter her children, she told them this as well. Now in season 2 is she going to be like “yeah so I started a civil but can you not kill each other even though I told you we are in danger for literally most of your lives ? I still want Aegon to be king b-but I want Rhaenyra to be fwend (she just needs to give up on her claim, her ambition, her sons, and her father’s wishes) I just want what’s best for everybody, I’m a good person”.

It's inconsistent bc they sacrificed a lot to create it & didn't replace what they took with somethings substantial and logical. So they fly by the seat of their pants & write contradictory, writing wise. Goes for everything else on this show, where they rely on spectacle, good acting, and people significantly looking at each other with a few good lines here and there. But also somehow manage to sometimes pale in comparison to the book version's lines.

I think that the show wrote so terribly that the impression of her motive being that she sincerely thought her kids were in danger was conveyed as her true motive. Whereas it was actually always her jealousy regarding Rhaenyra's comparative "freedoms" and her desire for Rhaenyra to subjugate herself to her. Without ambition for ambition's sake or that being her primary motive and then her jealousy coming from Rhaenyra's having been given that which her own father and house denies Alicent, Alicent is duller and less sensical. And they didn't replace the motive towards jealousy with something sensical but with Alicent's supposed love for Rhaenrya, which comes in direct conflict with her jealousy of her being happier flouting the rules she herself seeks to derive social graces, authority, etc. in exchanges for her personal "sacrifices" and suffering.

The intent of the writers was to present an Alicent who felt this motive underneath a sincerity to find righteousness without bk!Alicent's ambition and flagrant disregard for lives other than her own and her kids. Which means that there is a sprinkle of sympathy they wanted the audience to feel for her AND say that she is a responsible--partly--for a terrible war. To make her less intimidating or seemingly threatening, at least seriously, they removed her political contemplation--or just her ability to use deductive reasoning--and made it more, once again, "doing the right thing", whatever word is for that sort of rule-following sincerity. In both show her/bk!her, there is a certain lack of self-awareness. Because for you to deny some basic customs to reinforce other customs that suit your desires and to then paint that as your "doing the will" of some higher principle which is itself the thing that oppresses you needs the separation from reality.

So at the core, HotD was going off the cool potential bk!Alicent already had, in particular episode 6-7. But Rhaenicent doesn't make any sense bc these two personalities together and staying friends for a long period of time--esp "best" friends-- just didn't make any sense. Yes, even with young Alicent. Esp without showing us how it came to be or how they became attracted to each other above all other possible candidates. Which is why there are no ladies in waiting, for example.

Alicent is void of something I can't really put my finger on but it prevents people from taking her seriously other than to self-insert or to sigh dreamily over. You can ship people all you like, like people shipping Rhaena with Aemond or Aegon with Daemon. But for goodness sakes', don't try to make such ships where you need to destroy a character canon and expect people to totally jive with the claim that it is possible without jeopardizing the entire story!

[night-market-if]

DEMO UPDATE SPOILERS

i reached the part where elias gives his grace to gabriel knowing he’ll succumb to his madness and die, and it hit me so hard, unexpectedly so. i started crying, i actually am crying as i’m typing this. the love that he has for gabriel.. more than his life.. it really is the true love of a parent.

i don’t want him to die i wish the night market could somehow locate another graceling before it’s too late or get stabbed again and somehow convert their life force into grace or just give their life force to them even if it’s just so elias and gabriel can life a little bit longer together i’m sobbing

and then the part where he replies “do you wish to have children?” after you thank him for his sacrifice. he’s saying so much with that simple question and his smile after the nm replies that they hadn’t thought about it. it broke me completely.

i’m still holding out feeble hope that elias will somehow overcome his madness yet. i don’t know how, and unlikely as it is, i guess i’d just like for them, elias and gabriel, to have a chance to nurture their relationship from it’s rocky grounds, reese included. more selfishly, i have grown fond of him and simply wish to see him live longer.

however, don’t let my wishful thinking sway your story in any way, please, if i may be presumptuous enough to believe it would. this is in no way a request or suggestion for the future plot. i leave the story and the characters’ fates to your brilliant mind. i am just along for the ride, feeling things just as you intended, hehe. i can’t wait to see what state the night market ends up in at the end of the journey.

happy writing and lots of love. :) <3

There has been so much discourse on Elias and somewhat on Reese lately and it brings me such joy. Because I have opposite reactions on them at times. Some people hate Elias. Others sympathize. Others are conflicted as hell. A point has even been made that you can have great relationships and do good things while being a bad person or vice versa. And the reason this brings me such joy is because I feel like I made a character that doesn't have a cut or dry answer depending on who you are. I like that depending on what you know, you have different feelings about Elias.

That all being said, I really really really want to write Elias and Reese's story of how they got to the Night Market. I really want to go into the question of his maddness. Is it innately him that is doing it or is it a true sickness? Where do we draw the line? But more importantly, I want to in Book 2, at least have Elias know that Reese is actually alive. And I wanted to have some sort of resolution between the strained relationship that Gabriel has with both of his fathers.

As a side note to readers, however. I get that our world is a dumpster fire right now. Especially given some of the political things that are going on. I get that we are all kind of in this teetering point upon a very high cliff. But, please do remember that this story is fantasy. That we are exploring characters and what makes people do certain things. Do not attack each other for differing POV's. I know that is kind of a Tumblr thing to do, stating that if you like xyz then you are "insert bad thing'. Let's not. This is a story. An escape. Not a real life issue. And let us all remember that things hit different for different people. That is not a reflection on anyone's morality. A well read person consumes a lot of different kinds of stories.

[blackautmedia]

It ended up being way more intensive than I had planned, but I did finish the writing for the Zelda video.

I managed to grab that James Somerton video he made about queer portrayals in Nintendo before it was privated. I haven't located any evidence suggesting it was plagiarized given the extent he's done it in nearly all his videos but that doesn't mean it hasn't occurred. I'm still trying to search and see if I can find any evidence of plagiarism to credit its proper author(s) if it is in fact stolen. There will be a section discussing the intersection of queerness and race with queer readings of Link and the Gerudo.

That aside, I wanted to share a bit! I picked out paragraphs out of order from how they're actually written, but these are a few of the points in the section about "the natural order of Hyrule."

Both film and TV westerns purport to be based on US history: the past is reframed as a glorious undertaking, the fulfillment of God's wish for his chosen people or as a rescue mission designed to rescue the pitiful other from himself or from some demonic other. Such fantasies serve to justify and legitimize colonial norms and practices. Stam and Spence explain that the colonial enterprise was often presented as a philanthropic "civilizing mission," reframing the colonial presence as a humanitarian intervention rather than an invasion. - Native Americans on Network TV : Stereotypes, Myths, and the 'Good Indian'

In Zelda Lore, it's said according to an entry in Hyrule Historia that "Hylians possessed a special power: it was said that their long ears allowed them to hear the voices of the gods." there's an inherent birth connection to the gods and to divinity in this series.

The best examples of community portrayal in the game exist when you remove Link from the equation. There are numerous instances of the different tribes providing support to one another--the Gerudo providing aid to refugees of Lurelin village, people providing resources to the Rito in their time of crisis, and the construction town helping in the rebuilding effort.

But a central part of what separates gaming from other types of media like books and TV is that you're not just a reader or viewer, but a player--you're asked to actively take part in the narrative and influence it yourself.

That community commentary also conflicts with the desire to treat Link as a demigod with the most major figures in the story continually sacrificing their autonomy and personhood to become resources that Link is ultimately to wield. Rauru gifts Link with some of his powers to save him from the Gloom. Mineru becomes little more than a rock 'em sock 'em robot for Link to pilot with little to no actual concern for her as a person.

Zelda is given the illusion of having agency in this story with how she orchestrates the conditions for Link to be able to defeat Ganon, but ultimately that doesn't come from her utilizing her research skills or building off the things her family provided her. Rauru even says he believes Zelda arrived to them for a reason, and based on what happens, it was ultimately so she could sacrifice herself yet again.

I'm not in the camp of people who wanted to see Zelda permanently stay a dragon at the end, I just want Zelda to not continually be sidelined in a series that constantly asks to sacrifice herself so she can't be an active part of the story.

The land and society once owned by gods must be restored and brought to its former glory as it is fated to be led by the divinely chosen Hylians. To that end, to defeat the evil and violent Middle Easterner who has defied the natural order of Hyrule, everyone must sacrifice themselves for Link to become the divine governor of power.

(This portion is part of the conclusion)

In thinking over what to write for this last portion, I came away feeling Nintendo's patterns here are a good example of why we should heavily value and take seriously the talents of artists and character designers.

It's important because art is so valuable in how it shapes the implications of the story, intentional or not.

I'm not here to convince you to boycott or stop playing Zelda because the issue goes beyond the scope of this individual franchise. What I ask more than anything is to see the people being propagandized as human and to equip yourself with the tools to better detect and resist the narratives both in fiction and non-fictional media.

[vaelzz]

do you post AI art or did you make it

It's a mixture, I've been making art for about 10 years now but some of the more recent ones are incorporating AI. I'm currently combining older methods and techniques with AI to come up with some new and cool results. It still ends up taking tons of time and effort but I can get ideas out from my head much quicker and better now. I do get overly anxious and a sense of imposter syndrome because I'm not entirely doing things by hand but I've been trying to get over that. I've had a few people be negative or dismissive about me using it but I don't think they understand it's not as simple as me writing a couple of sentences to instantly get some masterpiece. I have a lot more I've worked on but I've just been too in my head overthinking it to post because I feel irrationally guilty? I mean most of my work is photographic except I've painted over them with a Wacom tablet in Photoshop which was also enough for me to feel the imposter syndrome and avoid making things. So yeah I am still super conflicted because I have a few hundreds artworks I've made throughout my life and then I have these newer ones using a blend of digital painting and AI to better assist in my process but I get anxious because I don't want it to discredit everything I've done but I also know with these new tools it's going to be harder than ever to keep up unless I use them. It really isn't worth me spending 30-40 hours on a single artwork when no one really cares and I'm not getting paid for it either, just sitting alone in my room suffering and forcing myself to make a single artwork for what? I actually had someone accuse one of my artworks as being AI made before I even used it until I showed them the earlier versions and the slow time consuming process. Like I am a bit cut up over AI because I spent so much of my life learning art and making sacrifices so I'd have the time and space for it.. but it's an adapt or die situation for digital artists. These AI models do keep getting better though so whilst not there yet it does make me debate what things will look like when they are good enough for you to simply ask it to make you an artwork of whatever you want and for it to instantly pull out a masterpiece. I find that scary because what is there left for me to do? What is my purpose in it all? Would that even be my own self-expression? (The overthinking list goes on and on lol) Perhaps it's just an ego thing though and the accessibility gives more people the means of self-expression which they previously did not have the opportunity. I guess the only part that worries me is that I put so much time, effort and thought into everything that the idea of someone dismissing or disregarding it is quite hurtful. (which tbh is the reason I barely post) All I really wanted to do was make cool things and have people go "wow, that's so cool, how did you think of that? How does your mind work?" as opposed to "Nice AI artwork". So yee TL;DR Mixture of AI but all my older stuff is done completely by me. I'm working on putting together a portfolio/collection of older works just so I can have some distinction there.