#anon is off so if you want to tell me to kill myself you'll have to do it with your name attached <3

[supernovasimplicity]

I wish I could be the kind of person who takes out of context, deliberately mistranslated screenshots from an account whose bio is a blackmail ransom note at face value

but unfortunately something about watching an excruciating, months-long harrassment campaign by a known liar who has twisted every fact (and then invented "facts" for good measure) to paint this man as the devil incarnate has left me slightly less trusting than that

which is a shame because you all seem to be having a wonderful time on your moral high horse

[youneedsomeprompts]

~ FORBIDDEN LOVE ~ PROMPTS about secret dating

requested by: various anons requests: I saw the "Forbidden Love" prompts, mostly about not admitting to themselves / each other, and it really made me yearn for forbidden love prompts where they're together but they have to hide it from everyone else; one sided “keeping a relationship hidden from coworkers”; can you post prompts about two oblivious people who are already dating but the other people don't know they're dating? dialogues or scenarios would do<3 thank you and love your prompt contents!

Feel free to use and reblog!

Part 1: ~ FORBIDDEN LOVE ~ PROMPTS about confessing a forbidden crush Part 2: ~ FORBIDDEN LOVE ~ PROMPTS about showing love without confessing

Setting/scenario:

#1 - keeping it secret at first because they didn't think it would turn into something that serious anyway #2 - enjoying the thrill of the secrecy #3 - being unsure whether that nervous feeling in their stomach is coming from their feelings for the other or the fact the relationship has to be kept a secret #4 - it's killing them that they have no one they can share their thoughts about their new relationship with #5 - making up the most random excuses to secretly meet up with the other #6 - screaming internally because they're having a date but they can't talk about it #7 - trying to act casual and unsuspicious in public when they're together but it's so hard #8 - teasing the other because they know how hard it is for them to keep their affection/arousal to themselves #9 - making promises that they don't have to keep it secret for much longer (but is it really realistic?) #10 - developing a method to communicate in code #11 - keeping it secret to protect the other #12 - keeping it secret until better times come #13 - making up for keeping it secret by extremely romantic/spoiling dates when they're alone #14 - wanting to fix everything before making the other their official s/o #15 - finding it the least stressful way to date to just keep it secret #16 - enjoying their little, happy secret because that way, no one can ruin it/take it from them #17 - it's like living in two completely separate worlds because their relationship is something that just exists between the two of them and the time together is always otherworldly #18 - wanting to stay in their happy dream world forever #19 - making plans for the future together, even though they don't know where they will be tomorrow #20 - they're keeping the other's love letters hidden under their pillow even though they know how risky it is

Dialogue:

#21 - "You're the most precious thing to me. So, I have to keep you as safe as possible." #22 - "Ah, I'm glad to have you finally to myself." #23 - "When I'm with you, it's like the earth stood still. I'm never so at peace." #24 - "You know, I really don't want to imagine what would happen if the others knew." #25 - "We have to be more careful. This was really a close call." #26 - "Do you really think it's necessary we keep it secret for much longer?" #27 - "I'm doing this for you. You're much better off when the others don't know." "You always say that. But I'm not sure if I still believe it." #28 - "It's not ideal but hell would break lose if it came out. I'm really glad we have the moments of peace. And intimacy." #29 - "Could you have imagined that we would someday end up like this?" #30 - "You're the best that happened to me. And I can tell no one about it. But I want to shout it from the rooftops." "Oh, you better don't. But you can always whisper it to my ear." #31 - "Isn't it fun to have this secret?" #32 - ^ "That's one way to call it." #33 - "I was really impressed how you handled that earlier. So cool. So smooth. So casual. As if I hadn't just made you whimper and made your eyes roll back minutes prior." #34 - "It's all worth it. I would risk it all again just to be with you." #35 - "Do you really think this is a good idea? They could find us." #36 - "You'll be the death of me." #37 - "To be honest, it's pretty funny to see you acting so unfazed and oblivious when we both know you were still thinking about me being naked." #38 - ^ "I always think about you being naked. It's not as if it's a new challenge to keep a straight face." #39 - "But you do know that I'm doing this all for you, right? Otherwise, I couldn't care less." "But you have to act as if you were in for the thing itself. They cannot connect you to me." #40 - "One day, I will carry you off to a place where it's just us. So, be prepared to be kindly abducted one day, alright?"

[separatist-apologist]

rude that people are telling you and your friends to kill yourself on anon!! i’m telling you all to live and to live beautifully and fully and enjoy love and life and to live on anon instead so it cancels out all of the hate you’re getting 💖

You're gorgeous anon.

There's been an uptick in the nonsense lately and I want to say that like, not having book confirmation isn't an excuse to behave like this. I keep seeing like, "well if people knew the next pairing they wouldn't act like this" but like- common decency demands you don't act like regardless of confirmation.

No amount of confirmation will remove the shippers you don't like, first of fucking all. There are still Feylins, still Feyciens, still Tamsands, all of whom DESERVE space to be here. And there will always be elriels, gwynriels, and eluciens REGARDLESS of the book pairings, just like there are Nessians and Neris people.

And I'm so genuinely curious- if I, or one of my friends, did kill myself, would you celebrate? Pat yourself on the back for a job well done? I want to know. I want someone to come answer this question off anon (don't be a fucking coward, look me in the eyes and say it) like you'll sleep better at night knowing an actual human person is dead by your hands because they liked a fictional pairing you don't and spoke about it?

I'm fine- genuinely please don't feel like you need to come into my askbox hyping me up because I'm fine. But it is wearing some of my friends down and your actions have consequences. At best- and I want all the anons out here advocating for someone to die- your IP is traceable. That's not some hidden thing, you're only as secret as tumblr allows, which isn't very secret at all given how easy it is to access someones data on the internet.

I think morally its fucked up, I think ethically you're a piece of shit, but if nothing else, baiting someone into suicide is a crime in most US states, if not all and maybe you should be scared.

You should also be ashamed. Like deeply ashamed. And I know you're reading this right now, logged out of your regular account, because you're OBSESSED even though you claim you hate me/the other people you do this to. And I know in your real life you lay awake at night and wonder why people don't like you. I can tell you: because you fucking suck. There is something so rotten, so outwardly off-putting that other people can see it a mile away, like an aura so neon it warns people not to get close.

And instead of getting a therapist and working on yourself, you go on the internet and try and make other people feel as bad as you feel about yourself. That's not going to fix anything personal for you, and I'll bet at the end of the day, it doesn't even feel good, either. You're still hollow and lonely. I'd feel bad for you, but honestly I don't feel anything at all.

[thelesbianpoirot]

Do you have any advice for us lesbians who feel hopeless when it comes to our own dating life? I have ever only been with one woman and while I cared about her so much, I'm starting to realise now that I didn't mean much to her. And sex was actually depressing because she never wanted to return the pleasure I gave to her. It all felt, it still feels so hollow. And being a masculine lesbian makes it even worse - I feel like I've always been ugly but the sin of homosexuality AND masculinity makes me even uglier in the eyes of everyone. And I feel like so many women expect that if you're masculine, you will basically maintain this stoic persona 24/7. You'll be somebody who never needs anything, who doesn't need pleasure, love or joy. It's like having to repent for being a woman in a wrong way. I feel like I've only been ever used by other women or they played with me, and then when they realised I am not their perfect Animus, they discarded me. I know that's so much negativity in one anon but I really enjoy lurking on your blog and kinda look up to you as I'm a bit lonely. Like that post where you mentioned skipping class to have sex, that was so iconic. So I was just wondering if anyone else has ever felt like this? If you have some wise words? Or maybe I should just accept and cope with my own ugliness.

Can I tell you I feel seen by your ask? This ask is essentially my life. You are not alone. Do not be fool by the snippets of my life I share on tumblr. Me having a sex life was short lived, and I have been sexual with four women, one of which was a love distance relationships with phone, skype sex and regrettably sending nudes. I made out with a couple more women, but they didn't want to go further and I respected that. I am no don Juan, I just am not afraid to ask women out, I have lived in about four countries and I have spent way too much time on dating apps. Of the women I had actual sex with and made cum, none of them wanted to return the favor, but I enjoyed giving them pleasure, but after multiple sexual encounters with no women wanting to interact with my naked body, and make me cum, it becomes a read.

I had a post much earlier on this blog about how no women I have ever dated has been as passionate about me as I was about her. I believe a couple women I dated only dated me because we live in a small homophobic region and the lesbian dating pool is microscopic and they have few options. This is how they treated me. The women I skipped class to have sex with had an on and off again sexual relationship with me for several years, her family lived in my country but she was Canadian, she would stay for couple months, we'd have sex and she'd leave again, I was something to do while she was there, she mocked my skin color (she was also black) a few times and did many other rude things. But I was so attracted to her, it made me fucking stupid. Many interactions with women have made me feel repulsive, and not worthy of living. I would talk for months with a woman on a dating app, then move to whatapp, calling and texting to schedule a meet up, and she cancels or stands me up, multiple times. I exist to make her laugh or feel good about herself, but she doesn't want to be seen out in public with me. My homosexuality, my masculinity, my skin color, my weight, my shape, my everything has made me feel repulsive to other women. What keeps me going is reading romantic/erotic fiction and hoping it happens to me, forging platonic connections with women who actually care for me, and the understanding that MID to HIDEOUS broke untalented and boring straight men get to have beautiful female partners, I should too. There has to be some sexy weird women out there who are attracted to me physically, and will love me passionately. And me killing myself or something will just be another lesbian woman this world has gotten rid of. I keep living and wanting more for myself purely out of spite sometimes. Every comment that says "terf dyke kill yourself" makes me take better care of myself and prosper. My dating life would probably improve if I lived in a big metropolitan city in a country with 1mil+ people, because I can ask out beyonce if left alone with her for five minutes, my fear of approaching women is GONE, because she can only say no. I have had a girl I asked out in college laugh in my face, in front of her group of friends, I can handle anything. But I don't think I will ever not feel like some disgusting monster. I don't own mirrors, I had a eating disorder, SIS, we are birds of a feather. Only advice I can give is that They want you feeling this way, they want you defeated and hopeless, while straight pig men have loving wives and gfs. Why we can't we! Ugly to whom? I was just watching challengers today with some of my friends, the women spent the whole day lusting over the two male costars, I may be a lesbian, but I think I can spot a handsome man, one who society has told me is a handsome man, one who's personality overcomes his face and body, but those two men were ugly as sin to me, their faces just made me cringe disgust, yet I was in a room with 3 women lusting over them. Lets hope together that even if we're ugly, we're have three eligible women in the world of eight billion who eagerly want to fuck us, attraction is strange.

[crossroadsnumber1doctor]

alright fuck it not the usual post but this needs to be addressed right now and I'm not about to pussy out even if I'm probably going to be attacked for it.

Now I personally haven't gotten any bad apples over here yet and I'm not going into the specifics but there has been a couple Anons attacking a certain friend of mine and this needs to stop real quick. I know I'm not popular, this likely won't get the reach it needs, but I don't care because atleast someone will see it. Unfortunately no CW tags for this one either because this needs to be seen.

I don't know who you are, of course I don't, but god. You don't just go telling people to off themselves when you don't even know them. Hell, you knew their mental state before that and still went right ahead and told them to, most of the time people don't even know about that before sending dumbass shit like what you said.

And the fact is, you hid yourself behind an Anon instead of just saying out outright. No, Anons aren't cowards like you are. Hell, it's brave in itself to just send a simple ask in my opinion and I'm really grateful of all the wonderful Anons here. But the fact you went ahead and told someone to kill themselves WHILE hiding behind Anon just shows to me how much of a goddamn coward you really are not even being able to muster up the balls to say it on main. To me that just removes any credit or power you could have had.

Yes, life is hard. Yes, in most cases it will get more difficult. But with the help of the people that care about and love you, you can persevere and enjoy those good days or happy moments in life. Hell, one day it won't be as hard as it is. I know that struggle, hell, I struggle with it myself. But I believe in you and that whoever is reading this that you can carry on and work through it, have some fun in the meantime, nothing is worth losing your life over. And to jackasses like that anon.. Perhaps go outside, feel the sun on your skin, breathe in some fresh air and go on a walk. Perhaps after a nice relaxation you'll rethink sending shit like that.

I'm tired, stressed, feel sick, have a headache and just want to go back to sleep for a month. But I can't rest if there's someone out there doing shit like this to the people I care about, nonetheless just enjoy things and pretend that nothing's wrong, not if this is what I keep waking to. I can't do much of comfort myself, but I can speak, and speak I will. So, Anon, either get your shit together or stop being a goddamn coward and show yourself. I don't think any of us want to have to deal with this again.

Apologies if the wording on this is god awful but I do hope that atleast the message got across. I won't be answering asks here for a bit just to make sure that it's seen but feel free to send them in still I suppose.

[muraseclinic]

This is the dumbest post I will ever make online. Anon on to keep my last shred of dignity. Hope the post doesn't break.

All of your pretty words have been plaguing my fucking mind recently. Been thinking a lot about the type of shit you say. I'm normally a sadist dom, but your posts slip me into a stupid fucking masochistic stupor. I've read at least every word about a dozen times over. It's pretty fucked up how desperate I am about all this. I doubt you even care, but I don't think I want you to.

I picture the scene pretty vividly, you telling me exactly what steps puppy has to follow. Maybe I fight back, helplessly trying to turn the tables, but it doesn't work. It'll never work against you. You'll only mindfuck me harder. Telling me I don't know what I want, telling me to get over it. How I don't deserve to be in control. Slipping me further and further into absolute submission, I won't be able to resist anymore.

You'll tell me to cut my veins open, let it all bleed out, and I'll obey. 'Cause it's what you want. My desires don't matter. It's all about pleasing you. The knife'll sink deep into my flesh, carving deep grooves, brilliant shades of red rising to the surface. The blood scent in the air is fucking pungent. You'll laugh, almost angelic but truthfully cruel. You'll stomp down on my wrist, the blood spurting out of the cuts onto your boot, maybe you'll even fracture the bone. You'll tell me to clean up my mess. I'll stick my tongue out like the whores in pornos do, idiot and crass, and I'll lick up my own gore off the vamp of your boot without a second thought. That copper taste so familiar, it's all I'll know beyond this point.

We'll go for hours, days even. I'll be a fuckin' drugged up cut up mess, sobbing and broken, and you'll be laughing through it all. You'll get bored eventually, I know you will, and then you'll give me one last command. You'll tell me those lovely parting words, tell me to kill myself for you, it's the final act to our fucked up scene. And I'll do it. A kicked puppy only wants to please its ruthless master. I'll make it slow, just so you can take in my gargled cries like an alluringly haunting symphony of pain. Choking on my own blood, fucking filthy.

Then what comes after? That's for you to decide. Not me, of course.

fuck anon .ᐟ ,, you’ve really outdone yourself this time haven’t you (ㅅ´ ˘ `) i gotta say, i'm flattered that my “pretty words” have been rattling around that head of yours . . .

now, for that very very nice scene you mentioned . .

i'd peel away that last shred of dignity, leaving you a broken mess at my feet. it’d take some effort, considering you have the same knack for violence and defiance as an untrained mutt, but we’d eventually get there wouldn’t we .ᐣ i'd savor every agonized gasp, every gurgled cry as you choke on your own blood. it'd be one of the most beautiful, and most disgusting things i’ve ever seen, and it’d be all for me . . .

i’d enjoy the moment, might even record you killing yourself just to add it to my personal collection. but, once the deed has been done, and you're lying there in a pool of your own blood .ᐣ well, my interest tends to wane pretty damn quick. ᓚᘏᗢ i dunno - i've got better things to do than babysit a corpse. . .

but just because you’re dead doesn’t mean you can’t be useful, now does it .ᐣ you’ve got a little more left to give until i get sick of you. . .

i’m sure i’d find something, anything, to make it so that even in death you weren’t a waste of time. cut into you with zero-surgical precision, rough and uneven, take out whatever interests me or whatever i think might taste good (๑⃙⃘´༥`๑⃙⃘) maybe i won’t be able to hold back, might not be able to wait til’ everything is clean, cut and organized. might start tearing into you right then and there, making more of a mess of things. you won’t mind, right .ᐣ for the rest of you, i’ll find ways to utilize every last scrap. maybe i’ll tan your skin, craft it into a wallet or a glove . . might take a picture of your body n’ hang it somewhere. your corpse, once i’ve gotten everything i can out of if, will probably be left behind some dingy motel or in an alleyway.

if i’m feeling nice, i might even send it home to where your family is as a surprise. they can burden themselves with it now ᥫ᭡

[decepti-thots]

I was in the tumblr tf fandom for a hot second a few years ago and i just wanted to ask, is it still really aggressive here? because back then there was a lot of shipping drama, there were a few callout posts going around (can't really remember about what) and just...a lot of bad stuff. I personally had someone tell me to kill myself because I liked one of the villains. guess I'm just wondering if, in your opinion, things have chilled out? Cuz I'd like to get back into it but I'm a little hesitant;;;

I'm going to try and give the fullest answer I can in the best faith to this! For context, this blog is a couple years old now, I have enough followers that I get a lot of active engagement on my posts etc, I am very active in TF fandom here, Twitter, and IRL, and while I did not used to be active I have been lurking in TF fandom as long as I have been on Tumblr.

There is absolutely still some toxicity; all fandoms have their bad faith actors, their drama hounds, their shipping Diskhorsers TM. I have gotten hate mail, I know folks who have issue with weird anon haters who are persistent, whatever. But no, it is not as bad as it has been in the past, IMO, not at ALL, and it is 100% possible to have an active, sociable and nice time in this fandom so long as you curate your engagement, with basically no drama at all. Many of the worst folks burned out and left when the fandom got less active and their shitstirring paid lesser and lesser dividends, IME.

People sometimes ask how I maintain such a vocal presence without falling into the still-there drama, and I have some advice that I promise you will mitigate like, 99% of the possible issues you could encounter:

Block whenever you feel like blocking. If you get a bad vibe, if you just don't personally like someone and don't wanna see them, if you see them throwing what looks like a temper tantrum you don't want in on, just block 'em. Remember: blocking is nothing personal towards the person you are blocking. It is not insulting and doesn't need to be 'earned'. Block every single person you think not blocking might even just theoretically cause stress or drama. (I am blocked by several people for reasons no more serious than 'I hate your OTP', and I commend every one of them for doing it and having a better time on this site!)

Delete any and all anon hate. Block anyone and everyone who sends you hate. No exceptions. No witty comebacks. No takedowns. Nothing. You see it and the actual literal second you do, you block and delete. None of it is worth one second of your time. Deprived of the oxygen, they will leave. And you won't be tempted to re-read it and stress out.

In that same vein, if it causes issues, just turn anon off! Turn it off. Personally I keep it on because I simply do not care about the odd troll, but if you care even slightly? Fuck 'em, turn it off, anon is a privilege your followers need to earn by acting in good faith.

Find people you like and follow them, ignore blatant shitstirring in the maintags (again: block people!) and try to curate content and follows and mutuals based on what you do like and not what you don't. Curate positive engagement; do not rely on the general fandom slurry, find what you like and hang out in your own corner of things that bring you joy. If the maintag stresses you out: don't check it. Check the blogs of folks you know are cool instead. Stuff like that.

Fandom should be fun. Fandom should be finding people you like and sharing good times with them, not stressing about avoiding folks you hate, or who hate you. Tumblr lets you moderate how you engage, when, and where more than almost any current social media site; now you can even turn off reblogs and oh my GOD is that a lifesaver function btw. If you want, you can make your blog unsearchable! It means you will need to be more proactive in making friends. But TF fandom is pretty tight knit these days, and folks want to talk a lot of the time. You'll still be able to engage with cool people.

There's way less aggro losers around these days, but more to the point, you can absolutely avoid the ones that still insist on being annoying and starve them out without much effort, tbh.

[lulu-nightbon]

... hey. if any of you noticed i just turned off anon, here's why.

this is a screenshot of my inbox on my littlespace blog (which i will not be linking here, it's in the reblogs of the post of me asking for help with donations, i know im gonna get a bunch of shit for having one so i turned off reblogs to try and at least ease that up) with my legal name (it's not my real name it's not it's not it's not i hate it i don't want it i don't like it i don't want it to be my real name) censored for privacy (though you'll find it anyway if you go to my c*sh*pp or my v*nm* to help out).

please stop. it was a month ago. it wasn't even directed at pride. the situation was resolved. i would really appreciate it if you guys stopped telling me to kill myself. thank you.

and im sorry again for asking for money, especially for so much. i wouldn't have if i didn't have to, i never wanted to be such a burden on here.

[chaisshitposts]

EYELASHES/🍓 ANON POPS UP RANDOMLY

Here is a little detox questions for you because you deserve it for the hard work 😔✨

1. OOOO your MBTI?

2. What's your favorite season? Like a season that makes you melt in bed 🏃🏃🏃 (only me?)

3. Favorite singer? And their favorite song?

4. ANY FUNNY SCENARIO HAPPENED THAT IS STILL IN YOUR MIND?

5. If you had the ability to posses one power, what will it be? 😗🧐

6. Do fishes have thirst for water 🧍

(yes that last one was random and had me thinking nonstop like wtf do fishes drink water orrr-)

ANYWAYS LOVE U AND TAKE CARE, YOU DESERVE THE WORLD

aw :( ty 🍓 !!! you're v sweet, these are some fun lil' questions :D ya should tell me yer own answers if ya get the chance, I'm curious !!!

1- I honestly have no idea 😭 I took the test a couple times before bc I kept forgetting cause all those letters are hard to remember and I still don't remember!!! heh im sorry 👉👈

2- melt in bed... that sounds so funny 💀 I'm a fan of winter!!!!!! I love the chrimuth decorations and the cold weather bc I like to get all warm and toasty, plus I like to wear the sweaters I crochet/knit throughout the year

3- favorite singer... That's a hard one indeed 🤔 I listen to all types of music that makes my brain go brrr especially music with lots and lots of bass, I think my favorite type has to be hard metal screamo rap music simply because headbangin' is somethin' I do to stim when I'm overwhelmed with hefty emotions. 🧍 my favorite song that I'm currently hyperfixatin' on though is 'I love you hoe' by odetari & 9lives, I don't care for the lyrics but I really enjoy the 'spacey' feelin' I get when I listen to it... Kinda like that one song where people had this belief that it made people do their homework faster I think it was somethin' like... 'i can run faster with no wind resistance' or something, but the beat was so wiggly I have to find that song again... I JUST LOOKED IT UP-- the song is literally called 'no wind resistance' holy shit 😭

4- sigh... for some reason, I can't keep myself from laughin' when I hear someone pourin' liquid??? I used to have a thermos (I need to buy a new one) that I would fill with hot black/green tea and then whenever id pour the tea into the lil' cup I would giggle hysterically like some crazy person 😭 I think it's hereditary however, cause this morning I was drinkin' coffee near my mom and I have a tendency to 'slurp' from my mug and she kept gigglin' when I would slurp from it 😭 she also laughs when things are poured. the autism is strong in the family ngl. I even laughed RN at the memory of pourin' a cup of tea ._.

5- oh ya already know I'm gonna have my mailtda powers manifested soon 🧍 I'm talkin' telepathy, spell castin', teleportation, levitation, all that shit, but I do not want the ability to mind read bc that does not sound fun. hmm... pyrokinesis could be fun too

6- you'll have to ask 🐠 anon for that one 💀 bUt!!! I did learn a terrible fact today about dolphins! did y'know that dolphins terrorize pufferfish so that they can get high off the chemical that the pufferfish release in defense of predators? they throw the pufferfish around with the use of their teeth and stuff, tossin' them up and around, even above water, and then they like know when they need to stop gettin' high before the chemicals become lethal. there's enough poison in one pufferfish to kill 30 human adults but dolphins just love gettin' fuckin' HIGH!

im sorry for the ramblin' but if there's one thing to be told about me... I talk way too fuckin' much despite bein' an ambivert with a heavy lean towards bein' an introvert 🧍

[aspecpplarebeautiful]

I hope you don't mind me venting a bit, if you don't want to see this feel free to just ignore it.

My friends keep accidentally outing me?? They're all really close to me and I love them (/p), but I feel like they don't understand how private my identity is to me. Me and one of my friends (we'll call her S) went to summer camp together way back in July, and a bunch of us were hanging out in one of the dorms. And they start playing kiss, marry, kill (a game I have never understood lol), and S goes, "well, [my name] can't play, she's aroace." Which she had no right to do!! Of course she was right I had absolutely no inclination to join whatsoever, and one of the people had just come out to us as bi so we knew it was probably safe, but if I wanted that information spread to a bunch of girls I had never met before in my life I would have done it myself! Or the other day two other friends (C and Z) were jokingly shipping me and another friend (D) in our group chat, and I was just rejecting it (I did enjoy the pun with our names though), and then I reacted STRONGLY to discussion about kids. Obviously raised some questions, and C goes "Cause she's aarrroo". Which 1. isn't even the right part of my identity for that, and 2. Only 2 out of 5 people (not including myself) in that chat knew about it. Once again it was fine, it was hidden in a flood of messages, but still. I confided in them because I'm really close to them and trust them immensly (honestly, they can be uncoorparative sometimes, but they know when to back off if it's something serious and I trust them with my life) but I don't know how to make that clear to them, because I DON'T trust the people they're outing me to that much, and even if I do I want it to be on my own terms. The only people I've come out to so far that were entirely on my terms is them, my mom, and my cousin. I don't even know if my dad knows yet tbh, but if he does it was bc of my mom. Every other time was either an accident, or they forgot/didn't realize that I view it as a really big deal and just let it slip out.

The worst part is I want to be mad at them, but I can't. I quietly yell at them a little bit later, but none of my friends have ever done it multiple times, and if I'm close to someone I find it really hard to stay angry at them. So I want to tell them about it and get them to understand, but they've never done it since I told them I didn't like it, and I WANT to trust them but I still don't really because it's just so easy for them to slip up. All of the scenerios were fine in the end, it really was okay, but it could have not been okay and that makes me nervous. Any advice for how to tackle this?

I'm sorry that happened to you, Anon. It's really not as well-known as it should be that people should never out someone without their permission first. And it's not uncommon for people to just not realise that coming out isn't a one-and-done thing, that coming out to one person doesn't mean a person isn't just out. Especially since that's how it's often portrayed in media.

It does sound like they listened when you asked them to stop, and that's definitely a good sign. You are still allowed to have a conversation with them about it, though. Maybe start with something like 'I just want to explain to you guys why I asked you not to out me' or 'i just want to talk about it a bit, but I'm really happy you guys have been good about not telling people since I asked' or something like that, it won't feel like you're harping on them or putting them on the defensive or make them feel attacked, but just able to more clearly explain your side of things and be understood better.

I definitely think a good conversation is a good way to go, and help you clear the air a bit. And if you know they understand your side better, you'll likely feel more secure that they'll listen and be more careful about outing you.

All the best, Anon! Good luck!

[laurenkmyers]

(1/2) Hi, Lauren! Would you recommend me to watch Two Worlds? I'm debating with myself for a few weeks now, watching all these gif sets on tumblr. The things is... I find most of the BLs quite cringy which is a big no for me. Usually I like the BLs you're watching (I've really loved KinnPorsche, Not me, Kisseki, A Tale of 1000 Stars, ...), but there have also been shows you really loved but I wasn't able to finish - main example being Love in the Air (i just wasn't able to get past episode 3).

(2/2) Next shows I've tried but didn't finish are for example: Naughty Babe, Cutie Pie, Pit Babe. Could you advise me on which scale do you think the Two Worlds are? It looks intriguing but I'm afraid of a possible cringe lurking in the background. Looking at the BLs I've loved and the ones I didn't finished, would you be able to guess how I would feel about this one?

---

Helloooo sweet anon! Thank you for your messages!

Firstly, I must say, the bl's you listed that you enjoyed are superior. Well done on your immaculate taste. And the list you provided that you couldn't finish is also hilarious and accurate and I'm agreeing wholeheartedly on your opinions.

In terms of Two Worlds...I'm gonna be honest with you, I only started watching it for Max Kornthas. The man has a hold on me that I can't explain. So I may be slightly biased, however, that doesn't stop me from telling you that the show has surprised me in so many ways. I'm thoroughly enjoying it as a whole and hope more people watch it once it's finished. (Learning that it wasn't a domundi/mandee production also helped massively.)

Where it stands on a kp/notme level vs cutiepie/naughtybabe/pitbabe level, let me try and break it down for you:

Production level isn't quite kinnporsche WOW, but it's also not naughty babe cgi tiger TRAGEDY. It tips more on the kp side of production value. The locations are gorgeous, and the cinematography is pretty as hell. There are some dodgy camera tricks being used, but nothing to worry too much about.

The acting: As a whole I would say it's definitely better than your average thai bl. It's absolutely not Gun Attaphan level good. But I will say that Max is kinda killing it- and I'm not saying that from a particularly bias lens. His acting has improved an incredible amount since cutie pie/naughty babe. Nat, bless him, still has a little ways to go to really impress me, but he's also improved so fucking much I have to commend him. The guy playing the 2nd love interest is definitely the weakest actor of the bunch, but overall the acting is pretty good. No major complaints from me.

The narrative: I think this story in particular is incredibly interesting, it's unique, it's angsty, it's romantic, it's brutal, it's exciting, and a little bittersweet. The pacing can be a bit all over the place at times, but if you just go with it, you'll catch up quickly enough. The one major flaw for me in thai bls in general is that sometimes the story seems way more complicated then they actually are. This story really isn't that complicated if you don't think too hard about the details. Are there plotholes? Ofc there are. But it's nothing too glaringly obvious that I want to rant about it.

Another plus is that there is no quick-how-can-we-promote-this-thing-that-has-no-relevance-to-the-show product placement, which is something I only noticed two episodes ago but am highly grateful for.

The thai bl cringefactor: There are moments where I thought I would be cringing up a storm, but so far it's been pretty tame in terms of typical bl cringe moments. There's no guitars or singing (praying it stays that way), but we have had a few 'oops i tripped and fell into you and now we're staring into each other's eyes' moments, but honestly? They didn't bother me in the slightest. Maxnat pull off the elongated looks very well.

Spice level: We've only had one NC scene so far, it was definitely more on the romance side of the fence than the spicy one, but it lasted 7 minutes long...do with that information what you will. We've got more to come from both Maxnat and our side couple (who I'm also enjoying greatly, btw) Maxnat know how to fucking de-li-ver and from the looks of the trailer, our side couple also get a pretty steamy moment too.

The only potential downside to the show is the hefty trigger warning list. If you want to know them you can message or dm me and I'll make a separate list for you.

This response probably didn't need to be as long as it did, but I wanted to give you the facts. Do I think you should watch it? Yes. Do I think you'll like it? I think so. But is it to the standard of bl you seem to really enjoy? No. Do with this information what you will! And please feel free to tell me if you do start watching it and enjoying it because I'd love to hear your thoughts!

ps. (the CACKLE I let out reading that you couldn't get past episode 3 of LITA was wild because you're so valid. I skipped episodes 1-7 because I also couldn't handle the cringe, but if you did want to try it again- episodes 8-13 are much better- still a little cringe, I won't lie to you- but it's definitely the stronger of the two stories.)

[smute]

ok promised updates: hookup one ended up being "just" making out cause I had mixed feelings about the kissing (enjoyed it a bit but also didnt want to do it for more than a moment lol) next hookup planned is a new person, end of the week, so I will gain additional data to draw conclusions on whether or not I actually enjoy this enough to keep trying (my answer will probably be no cause I spent 8 years happily in an on-again-off-again exclusive relationship with my hand, and we have had some great and intimate few months and grown closer than ever, so tough competition) anyways, wish me luck that I might draw some satisfying conclusions posthaste and can quit faffing about with these damn dating apps

2/3: also never again trying to hookup with someone who smokes. i have had to scrub the smell off myself and my tongue and used Textilerfrischer on my poor sofa so my home could smell like my home again.... never!! again!!!

3/3: well i am here with my probably last update for a bit because my hookup cancelled on me cos they are recovering from top surgery, which is a good reason so I am not spurned or anything. so now no hookups lined up anymore and after that last date I am pretty ok with that, shame about my checklist but I tbh dont really experience sexual attraction or libido much so I can just wait til I find someone to love and want me for me and then have my gay sex revival in my 40s. if i managed to go 8 years without sex and not caring, then I can do another 10-15 :D plus my confidence is so much better now so if I do meet someone neat, then I can pursue I guess

(sorry i just checked my inbox!)

everyone stop cancelling hookups with anon challenge!!!! (although top surgery is a wonderful reason not to smash mouths and other things)

i mean yeah dating apps are super frustrating but if you'll allow me an observation: it sounds to me like it wasn't awful overall? i actually think you're doing amazing! no need for any conclusive decisions bestie just go with your gut. whatever happens happens!

BUT no smokers is definitely a good policy. #on all levels except physical i am a smoker etc. how can something be so hot in theory but so gross in practice? tell me will. you put the killing thing right between your teeth, but you don't give it the power to do its killing. cheesed burger. anyway. i digress 👁️👁️

were they a good kisser at least? REPORT BACK ASAP 💕

[ask-the-reaper-conspiracy]

"D-dead w…" (Mama is not dead. They're just words she uses to mean something else.) (She doesn't know how they hurt.) "A corpse is heavy because it cannot help us to carry it. That's why we say those words, 'dead weight', not just 'dead' to mean 'useless'." "…Do you know what is worse to carry than dead weight?" "You do, Mama. Even if you don't like to admit it." "It's a weight that fights you. A weight that struggles in your grip, screams at you, hurts you, does every thoughtless thing it can possibly do to keep you from carrying it even one step further." "A weight that, all the while you carry it, steadily, selfishly, insatiably sucks the life out of you." "That's what it means to carry the weight of a child." "Yet you carried me anyway, and we've never talked about why." "It took all this for me to ask why I exist." "I don't know that you wanted to be anyone's Mama, much less mine." "Did you even have the choice?" (Will I have the choice?) "I suppose you'll tell me when you want to, if you want to. You might even tell me the truth." "All I can tell you is why I want to carry you now, as you did for me." "It isn't a sense of obligation, though all I have and all I am I owe to you. Nor is it a sense of gratitude, though I am grateful." "And hopeless at showing it, I know." "It's only that…oh, this will sound terribly foolish, but…all my life, even when I was Maria Don't Touch That, or Maria Put That Down, or Maria Get Out Of The Way, or Maria I'm Entirely Too Busy For Your Nonsense Would You Kindly Go And Be Anywhere Else, or Maria As God Is My Witness If You Don't Stop Screaming…" "…even when I was the millstone 'round your neck…" "…you were my whole world." "I was…happy, just to be with you." "I still am. Even right now." "Isn't that foolish? You're in a cell, and you might have killed someone, and I think you're cross with me, perhaps, I can't tell for sure, but when I look at you I want to smile and laugh, just because my Mama is here with me." "Can't that be enough?" "You clung to me to your detriment. You clung to me even when they said I'd never walk nor speak, even when they said I belonged in the madhouse, even when he said I was better off drowned." "You had your reasons. They were enough." "Can you…trust that my reasons are enough for me?" "Please?"

—————–

Video submitted by the objection.lol anon!

(I didn't know... that he said that to you. WHEN did he say that to you...?) "I-I......" "The weight of a child is... not something that can be explained in such self-depreciating terms." "I had decided you were a part of me from the beginning. So carrying you was... only as natural as carrying a limb, to me." "You weren't supposed to see me the same way. 'She needs to learn to look after herself long before that,' I told myself." "... Of course." "I have always thought of myself as knowing best. Of knowing better than----everyone, and everything." "But I don't." "I don't even know at what point you've surpassed me, Maria, but you have." "In that trial you proved it with your usual blunt clarity." "A millstone was, and is incorrect." "Rather, Maria, think of yourself as the best part of me... the part I cannot credit my own actions with." "And I'll be... I will try to... know better than before."

—————–

Previous post

Check this page for credits

[thorne1435]

You're all disgusting pedos and you should stay away from kids. Normal people would have a problem with men, dressed in frocks and lipstick and go to the female bathroom. You literally have no reason to complain when half the society is lifting you up unfortunately for your bullshit by giving you opportunities which you Don't deserve in women sports. Just because you're a weak man afraid to stand up for yourself and are insecure of who you are, you bitch about your life and expects special treatment? The ban on your freakish trans rights was something good and effective after all, Kentucky did something good. When straight people even SAY something regarding the trans community, you get all defensive and bitch about it till no end and you have the audacity to even go as far as attacking us in mobs! Don't even get me started on those disgusting drag queens, they're fucking pedos and exposing such vile parts of their body needs to be categorized as child abuse. HOW are you okay with a grown adult flashing their privates at your children? That's legit disgusting and creepy and messed up. Fucking kill yourself disgusting groomer, you'll be doing everyone a favor 🙄 maybe then people won't get tired of your incessant whining and bitching

Hey dude, chill. Like, I can see what you're trying to do, but you're doing too much, so none of it's working.

You're trying to get me emotional so that when you tell me to kill myself at the end, I'll be caught up in the negativity and I'll go for it impulsively. But that's not gonna work if you can't at least write a coherent sentence. I need really solid logic to start doom-spiraling, or at least solid logic from my perspective. And uh, from the look of it, I don't think you can pull it off, yourself.

Like, okay, did you ever stop to think about why or how a transgender woman would be offended by you saying she was a "weak man"? Like, I'm not even a man, I don't care if I'm "weak" by masculine standards. You're full of shit either way though because I don't know what you could possibly mean by "afraid to stand up for yourself." I'm doing something that gets me hate like this and I've pretty consistently clapped back, even when it wasn't that funny. I'm doing it right now! Is this not standing up for myself? And I still accept Anon Asks, because you guys have yet to damage my self-esteem.

Anyway, I've never taken part in or encouraged the brigading of any TERF or transphobe ever. And I never would! That's not how my brain works. I feel sorry for you all, I talked about that pretty recently, because I understand that your mindset comes from a place of pain that I was in myself for years. And unlike you, when I see people who are doing something gross I think how miserable they must be and how I can help fix that problem. Even when I know I can't! So, yeah, even a cursory glance at my blog would've done you some good here.

I've never gotten special treatment in my life, or at least not for being trans. I live in rural Kentucky, and I feel like I've said that more than once, so...y'know, again, you could've figured that one out pretty easily. But anyway, it just means I'm scared in public. Do you think the MAGA-hats and Yee-Yees out here drop rose petals at my feet when they clock me and tell me how brave and noble I am for wanting tits? If I said anything too fag-y to the wrong one, they'd just pull out their conceal carry and fucking kill me. That's not even basic knowledge of me, that's just basic knowledge of the political climate.

Also, I don't care about sports. I never have and I never will, I don't think they should be played on a professional level at all, so even if we are ruining women's sports (which nobody watches), I...don't give a shit. I feel like I've said this more than once, so I really am just appalled.

Also, I don't care about drag, I never have and I never will. Though, I must give you some credit here, I haven't talked about that one before, because I'm not, like, militantly apathetic, I'm just apathetic.

I don't think it should be banned but also I'm never going to go to a drag show ever. To me, banning it is kind of like banning the opera, if that makes sense. Like, not everyone likes it, some people find it or the people who enjoy it irritating, but usually it's just not for those people. It would be kind of self-absorbed to label it "immoral" though.

I guess I shouldn't be too offended, but I'm only really offended in the first place that you didn't bother to get to know your mark. Am I somehow worth harassing yet not worth the effort of doing it right? Come on, man. Give me a little respect here. If not for me, then for the love of the craft.

You're never going to pierce my cynicism without cyberstalking me and saying something brutal and devastating based on the oversharing I've done. Give that a shot next time, I know you can do it. It'll be rough, you'll have to think really hard, but I believe in you, and I can't wait to see what you come up with Angry-Drunk Anon

[throwaway-yandere]

🎐 anon

Wait, wait, orange friend has a point. Killing off tighnari would be peak angst because no matter what route is chosen from then on, capo is confirmed not gonna live for a long time so theoretically, whichever guy picks up capo after tighnari's death is just picking up a rotting corpse, one that has been crushed of all their dreams and hopes and is a shell of their former self. I still cannot see benefit to keeping alhaitham alive other than to save myself a broken heart but 🐠 anon brings up a good point, bullying alhaitham is really fun and if capo manages to convince dottore to save him, they would undoubtedly become attached to him, which would make it even more angsty if he were to die after they tried so hard to keep him alive.

🤔🤔🤔 Hm, well Kaveh hasn't made his debut yet so I will hold back from making drastic decisions. Tighnari is now on even thinner ice and Alhaitham shall have a bit more sympathy from me for the sake of a fellow anon.

"whichever guy picks up capo after Tighnari's death is just picking up a rotting corpse" oh look you described diluc's route– /hj. No but seriously, Diluc's route is short but phcked up lmao. You can guess why.

Technically Cyno, Tighnari, AND Alhaitham were researching Eleazar (they have a list of who's infected, etc). Although they're not the only ones who's interested in finding the cure (it's pretty easy to know who's the 4th one lol), if Tighnari dies the reader's fate is indeed sealed. That's why as much as possible you should probably find a cure before the common route ends. But that's a very hard thing to accomplish, no? Just keep Tighnari alive ig lol

"I can't see any point of keeping Alhaitham alive other than to save myself a broken heart–" The Akasha Terminal. Hints. That's his reason why he should be alive gameplay wise lol.

"bullying alhaitham is really fun" IT IS HAHAHAHA. Rosaria is my spirit animal I'm sorry alhaitham, that really wasn't Rosaria's words those were mine (also, i fricking laughed so hard when Dehya did the same in the archon quest "So what if you're a scribe?" Hrjwidos I'm Dehya fr–)

Purple friend:

(no alhaitham ain't dying (i think? Idk I'll check the polls later) we're just playfully slandering him)

"Kaveh haven't made his debut yet–" my sweet sweet bby boi, literally never done anything wrong in his life like evah~ 💅 He just slaying hell yeah hold tf that's not what i was tryina type phck i forgot my thoughts uh oH right yeah kaveh's a fun yandere. He protecc with his sharp tongue I stan.

Okay but for real, trust me though, once Kaveh debuts you'll have to make a drastic decision if you want to keep him. I'm not saying anything else, it's fun to keep everyone in their toes.

Extra bullsht:

mostly Cyno appreciation:

As y'all can tell, I don't spoil sht to my friends either lMAO–

[growandrecover]

Hey,I was wondering if you had advice or tips for someone like me who puts restrictions on food and doesn’t really eat because they think they don’t deserve it or just avoids eating food .

Hey!

I just want to start off by saying that I used to be where you are. I'm so sorry that you're going through this, because this is such a horrible way to feel, and I completely understand where you're coming from. You're not alone in feeling like this, and there is a way out, I promise. If I can do it, you can do it, too.

My first piece of advice is: as much as your ed is telling you that you don't deserve food, you do. This is incredibly cheesy, but your ed is feeding off of you not feeding yourself. It thrives off of you hurting yourself, that's the only way it has power. You have to try to stop listening to it.

Now, not listening to it is pretty hard, but you can do it! Maybe start by eating a little bit more each day. Or if you only eat one meal a day, try eating two if you can. Your body is hungry for a reason- we need food to live.

When I started recovery, I had to look at it this way: me hurting myself isn't going to change anyone's opinion of me. Sure, some people might like me better at a certain weight, but those people are shallow. (I know, I know, you might be thinking that them liking you better at a lower weight is good, but trust me, it's not. It doesn't mean you're doing something right. It only means that you're succeeding in killing yourself.) I know that's pretty harsh, but if you want to stop being miserable, you're going to have to let your eating disorder stop calling the shots. When I realized that some people just weren't going to like me or find me attractive at any weight, it was easier for me to do the healthy thing and eat.

You deserve food, anon. You do. You don't have to restrict, purge, or over exercise to earn it, either. You deserve food just as you are. I don't care what your ed is telling you. From one person with an ed to another, you will be SO much happier if you eat. It's going to be hard at first, but you will be so thankful that you started listening to your body.

My next tip is: try to start being more mindful, especially when it comes time to eat. I know a lot of people with eds try to distract themselves when they eat, but I'm going to tell you do the opposite. You might be able to enjoy the food you eat this way (if you don't already.. I'm just saying this because I certainly didn't) and you'll be able to hopefully calm yourself down. Yes, your ed will tell you that you're doing something wrong. I know you're familiar with that. But try telling it that you're doing the right thing, even if it doesn't feel like it.

Next up: try to start journaling about your food, and how you feel when you eat, how you feel about your body, and any other disordered behaviors if you don't already. Journaling is a great way to clear your head and hear in your own words what's going on. When I was at my lowest mentally, I wrote a journal entry to my future self begging her to get out of this disease. I read it whenever I'm feeling bad about my current eating habits and it helps snap me back into reality.

I really hope this helped, and please don't hesitate to reach out again if you need anything or just someone to talk to.

You can do this! I believe in you <3