#anyway I can hit you up with sources to watch it if youre interesting but i got my little back up :3

[maruflix]

  — ★ 𝐏𝐋𝐀𝐘 𝐅𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓!

☆ — “WHOA, I’M REALLY GOING AGAINST THE UMEMIYA HAJIME IN HIS FULL GET UP? COAT AND ALL?”

SYNOPSIS: You spend too much time on TikTok looking at those martial artists who give out fighting tutorials. And what’s a gang member boyfriend for, if not as a punching bag for you to try out your new moves? FEATURING: Umemiya Hajime, Togame Jo, Takiishi Chika x f!reader

UMEMIYA HAJIME

The rooftop door is slammed wide open, causing UMEMIYA HAJIME to jump slightly in alarm. He angles his neck to check out the source of the noise, fully expecting it to be Sakura in another one of his bad moods, but it turns out to be you.

A smile blossoms on his face as he gestures for you to come over. “Heeey, my pretty girl!” 

You’re in front of him in an instant, looking at him intently. Umemiya blinks, confused. He can tell that you’re trying hard not to explode with excitement, but why?

“Hajime!” You point at your boyfriend, determined, “Fight me!”

A long silence follows. He bites his lip and tilts his head, trying to figure out if he heard that correctly. The Bofurin leader has received his fair share of challenges and offers for a duel, but never from his own girlfriend. “Um… wha-?”

“I said, fight me!” You yell out, a smile plastered on your face. “My sensei says that the best way to learn is by doing!”

“Since when do you have a sensei?”

“Well, my TikTok sensei.” You casually shrug as Umemiya stares at you in amusement. “Anyway! I have mastered the art of a 540 kick, and you shall be the first person to witness my glory!”

After practicing messily in your room and hitting your foot in all the sharp edges of your furniture, you feel like you’ve finally perfected your flashy jump kick. It took you perhaps hundreds of tries (mostly ending up with you tripping or falling down) but you finally manage to land a successful hit against your plush toy.

Umemiya whistles. “540 kick, huh? That’s fancy.” He sets down the pot of plants he has been holding while grabbing his coat in one swift motion. “Alright, come at me.” He smiles, getting into a very intimidating stance.

You gulp, not expecting him to actually take you seriously. Your boyfriend still gazes at you with the same gentle look as always, but man is he intimidating. “Whoa, I’m really going against the Umemiya Hajime in his full get up? Coat and all?”

At this, Umemiya chuckles. “Well, it’s not like everyday my girlfriend challenges me to a duel! I have to make sure to humor her thoroughly, right? Don’t worry, I won’t fight back.”

“Okay! Wait! I have to do my warm ups so this one will land! I’ll tell you when I’m done!” You hold up a finger, gesturing for him to wait as you kick at the air, trying to power up your legs. Umemiya watches in interest, his hands folded behind his back, letting out occasional “ooh!” and “aah!”s when you successfully kick high enough. 

You feel quite ready now, your legs feel as light as a feather. Glancing at Umemiya, who’s still watching you intently, an idea flashes through your mind. You know that there’s no way in hell you will be able to beat Umemiya in a fight, but what if you catch him by surprise?

Without notice, you quickly take a step forward and immediately rotate your hips, taking advantage of the momentum it gave you to lift up your other leg and kick it upwards. It feels good when your leg manages to fly up high enough to collide with your boyfriend’s torso… but the impact never came.

Umemiya holds your leg effortlessly before it can come into contact with the side of his chest, giving you a wide smile. “Not bad, you’re pretty flexible! But you didn’t tell me that we’re starting!”

“L-let go!” Flustered, you try to retract your leg but Umemiya keeps it in his vice-like grip.

“Huh? But our fight’s not over yet?” He cocks his head to the side, giving you a playful grin. “If I let go, won’t you try another dirty trick again?”

This man! You try to jab at him in the hopes of him letting go of your leg, but he dodges your fist. “All’s fair in love and war, Hajime!” You swirl your body backwards, trying to pivot your way out of his grip, but Umemiya pulls your leg forward slightly, causing you to stumble. You yelp, closing your eyes, knowing that you’ve lost your balance and you would certainly crash to the ground.

But of course, Umemiya catches you, pulling you into his embrace as he caresses your hair. He laughs in satisfaction when he sees you turn as red as the tomatoes he’s been growing. “You’d make a pretty good fighter! Do you want me to train you?”

“You can’t pull my leg like that! You’re cheating!” You protest, but he merely laughs harder.

“All’s fair in love and war, pretty girl.”

You hide your face in his chest, feeling the tips of your ears burning. You can’t lie, you had wished to successfully kick Bofurin’s strongest at least once after all that training, but being held like this isn’t half bad.

“One more time! I’ll kick you this time!”

TOGAME JO

Not a single thing in this world can prepare TOGAME JO for the absolute sight in front of him at this very moment. With a bottle of ramune in his hand, he stares at you open mouthed as you crouch down and jab at the air randomly, jumping up and down all around him.

“Ladies and gentlemen, here we have,” You punch the air next to him while your boyfriend remains unaffected, “a new challenger trying to take the title of Super Champion from the reigning Togame Jo!” You are breathing heavily as you narrate, still jumping up and down, trying your best to replicate those boxers you saw from a highlight video last night.

You’re actually not a big fan of martial arts with flashy moves and big kicks because you thought they looked too showy, but that one highlight video has opened your eyes to the beautiful world of boxing, as you spent all night looking at more and more fighting videos. The fighters look hella cool and their punches look hella deadly. No big showy moves, just precision and killing intent.

“What champion..?” Togame has so many questions running inside his head right now, but he’s distracted at how adorable you look with those weak punches.

You finally stop jumping, huffing to catch your breath, “W-well.. I know you’re technically the second-in-command, but you’re like a champion compared to me!” You put up your fists again, eyes shining playfully, “Anyway, let’s brawl!”

Togame’s jaw drops. “Did you just say brawl?” He runs a hand through his hair, already exhausted by your antics, “As in, you and me?”

“Hey, what’s that supposed to mean!?” Taking offense in his words, you punch his chest, but your boyfriend doesn’t even flinch. “Yes, you and me! I’m trying to be the next boxing super champion, keep up!”

Togame sighs, finally putting two and two together. You had sent him random links of boxing videos to him all night, waking him up repeatedly. So it’s because of another random hyperfixation. “Yeees, yeees..” He places his ramune bottle on the ground, rubbing the back of his neck. “Don’t complain to me if you get hurt.”

You shiver a bit at his warning. What the heck is that supposed to mean!? You watch as Togame cracks his neck, now feeling a bit scared. “Uh, you know that you don’t have to actually fight me, right? Like… let me land a few hits or something..?!”

Togame stares at you teasingly. “Don’t tell me I managed to intimidate you already?”

You’ve always had a competitive streak in you. You know that it’s going to be the death of you. “HELL NO! Come at me!” You shout without thinking, and instantly let out another scream in terror when your boyfriend dashes towards you with the speed of light.

“JO!” You yell, just in time before he can push you down. “That doesn’t count! I was, like, totally not ready! Doofus! Idiot!”

Togame snickers. You totally flinched. And hey, he’s actually enjoying this a lot more than he thought he will. “Okay, okay, you go first then.” He holds up his hand in mock surrender.

At that moment, you want nothing more than to wipe that smug smirk off his face. You charge at him with newfound confidence, punching and jabbing with all your might. He dodges you each time, even making sure to use the palm of his hands so as not to hurt you.

“Okaay, you need to move faster. Don’t punch in the same two spots~”

Annoyed, you step back, trying to think of a way to give him a single powerful punch. Getting an idea, you finally take a step forward as Togame watches you in interest. After feeling your entire weight rest comfortably on your left foot, you pivot your body towards him, feeling the force gather in your right fist. Oh? That felt good.

This time, Togame catches your fist with his hand, gripping it tight. “Hoo~? That one’s pretty good~” He muses, “Is it my turn now?”

Your boyfriend has the most annoying shit-eating grin as he tackles you down, holding an arm below your body to shield you from the impact. Nevertheless, it knocks the air out of your lungs as you gasp, hands shooting forward to grip the hem of his jacket.

Togame looks down at you, a sadistic look in his eyes. “Oops, looks like today’s not your day. Better luck next time, future super champion~”

Blushing at the close proximity between you two, you can only sputter out insults as your boyfriend laughs.

He’s totally going to make you do this more often.

TAKIISHI CHIKA

Honestly, you don’t know how you even got the courage to challenge TAKIISHI CHIKA in a fight. It is for the laughs and giggles, yes, but since when has your stoic boyfriend been able to differentiate between a joke and a real challenge?

“Okay, come.”

You stare at him, dumbfounded. You’ve tried many times to get him to do weird trends with you, but your boyfriend is usually quiet, only looking at you with the stare he always gives you when he’s done with your bullshit. (If you beg for it hard enough, he still does it, though.) 

But this time, when you tell him that you want to try out a kick at him after watching tutorials from those TikTok martial artists, you’re just saying it randomly, because there’s no way you actually wish to challenge The Strongest Man in Furin History in a fight. Surprisingly, he agrees immediately.

“R.. really? B-but…” You hesitate, unsure of the look he’s giving you right now. As stoic as he may look, there’s an unmistakable glint in his eye, something that only happens when he’s intrigued by something. “Chi-kun, you don’t love me anymore, do you?!” You yell in exasperation, wondering if today is going to be your last day on earth. Why would you even suggest such a thing towards your beast of a boyfriend?!

“Do you seriously think I’m going to hurt you?” Takiishi asks in a resigned voice.

“Okay, you promised! Don’t go back on your word!” You’re still panicking but your boyfriend returns to his quiet self, blinking at you. Sighing, you decide to take a leap of faith — your boyfriend has never so much as pushed you in the time you’ve been together — and take huge strides towards him, heart beating out of your ribcage. 

Takiishi towers over you, looking at you calmly, but his gaze only makes you more nervous. “Come.” He states once more when he sees that you’re still rooted to your spot. “I’ll keep my hands behind my back.”

Huffing, you decide to fuck it and take a big swing at him. He dodges to the side. You take another swing. He dodges that too. Another swing, another punch, but he dodges those as well, his hair barely swishing. He shows no signs of moving, patiently standing with his hands behind his back. At this, your courage grows and you decide to try riskier moves.

You lift up your leg and shoot it towards his hip. To your surprise, he doesn’t move an inch, taking your kick fully. Boy, does it hurt. For your leg, that is. The man is well-built underneath his layered clothes. There’s another glint in his eye when he watches you yelp in pain and crouch down to clutch your leg, your back facing him. 

“Come.” He says again, and you don’t need to be told twice. Still with your back facing him, you rise to a standing position and lift your leg high up before kicking it back towards him.

But your foot comes into contact with the air.

The next thing you know, Takiishi sweeps your footing, catching you as you fall straight into his arms. You look up at him, eyes wide and heart beating like crazy, but your breath instantly gets caught in your throat when you see a rare small smile playing on his lips. “Never turn your back on the enemy.” He states, tightening his grip around your waist.

This is the most chatty you’ve seen Takiishi Chika. And, true to his words, he doesn’t use his hands at all, except for catching you. You slowly start to smile, hooking your hands around his neck. You’re about to tease him that he does love you, after all, when he unexpectedly asks, “So, can I use my hands next time?”

“H-huh!? There’s a next time?!”

NOTES : This may be a bit OOC (especially Chika because the man barely says anything in the manga) but still I hope I can convey the love I have for these boys!! (these three are my favorite hee hee).

[blughxreader]

platonic yandere batfam thoughts...

how you end up integrating into the family.

I think we often forget how insidious the long-term effects of kidnapping are. Your whole world narrows and you have nothing fulfilling outside of them.

Realistically, how many weeks straight can you do nothing but look at your phone/watch TV? I know we do this every day, but we have school/work/friends/family to provide actual fulfillment and joy. But when you take that away? And have to decide whether you should scroll through monitored social media or talk to your captors?

Especially because the TV doesn't distract from the cold, hard gaze of the surveillance cameras in your room.

Even if you read and craft and cook, it's so difficult to keep your mental health in-tact without having a positive interaction with another human being.

It would start small.

It's morning and Cass smiles at you from across the breakfast table. Not wanting to be rude, you smile tightly back.

Jason wordlessly slides you a book. You take it.

After a few months, you feel slightly more comfortable about taking up space in the manor. Alfred is out of town for the weekend, so you make a sandwich with Tim.

Bruce talks to you about the new scientific breakthrough at Wayne Enterprises and keeps you relatively up-to-date on major world events. You begrudgingly learn more interesting facts than public school has ever taught you.

Soon, you've watched everything good on Netflix. You exhausted your tolerance for social media. You've given yourself headaches reading so much. You've hit an art/writers block like never before because your input has run dry.

With no other source of entertainment, you become more attentive to the Bats.

Of course, you've always watched them out of fear. But as months tick by and you've learned their hearts (and delusions), it's obvious that they would never hurt you. Furthermore, operating within their expectations is easy enough as long as you never challenge them, so the constant danger-sense slowly turns off.

However, because you don't have any outside noise to occupy your mind, drama in the house becomes almost life-and-death to you.

Peace is so fragile, and it's all you have.

Damian and Bruce return from patrol in a rage one night. Damian's furious echoes bouncing upstairs, followed by Bruce's low, indistinguishable scorn.

Fuck, you think. Now your and Bruce's talks are going to be stilted and uncomfortable. Now Damian is going to sulk in your room for hours, unwilling to talk about what happened yet wanting some kind of reassurance.

You can't keep them from fighting, but you want to protect your peace.

When you first arrived in this dreadful manor, you never would have imagined you'd offer them kind words and affection. However it's the only thing you can do now.

There's conflict. The house is tense--your world is tense.

Should you call Dick? He has a day job again, so he can't come over until tomorrow night. It's up to you to ease the tension.

So you do, slowly, with homemade food and Bruce's favorite coffee blend and Damian's favorite hot chocolate. You sit with them individually, shoulder to shoulder (much closer than you would normally sit), and pretend everything is alright. They're surprised but very quick to snap back into a good mood.

The house is suddenly back in order and you did it all by yourself.

And with these vigilantes, conflict is ripe. There's always people coming and going, fighting and playing, and you're unwillingly the most in-tune with the well-being of everyone's relationships.

You protect your peace. You protect the house.

this shit makes me gnaw at my enclosure. if you're fem, it's worse because ✨ stereotypical woman archetype ✨ anyway this has been on my mind because i've been taking care of my baby chicks and cooking dinner most nights, so i'm like 💁‍♀️ i could be a captive house wife click here for my yandere batfam masterlist

[dovveri]

you can kiss a hundred boys in bars

synopsis: good luck, babe! - inspired fic (essentially sana left 6 years ago and you still can't stop thinking about her even though you're married to another man)

warnings: cheating, internalised homophobia, not chronological, implied sex, cursing

w/c: 6.4k

a/n: hi 😀 this one may not hit as many of the audiences but it was interesting to write. i zon't think i like it toooo much for how much time i spent on it (edit: the moots have made my day i do like this one a lot actually) but just one of those things i needed to get out before i was able to move on to the next thing :P weeeEEEEHHEEEE i love angst!!!!!!!

ok this one's going to be a bit different guys pls READ THIS or you'll be like what the fuck. purple text is the present. ty enjoy, that was it LOL.

▂▂⌇

you wake up with a migraine. it came not long after you married frank and it’s stayed ever since. you sit up on the bed, careful not to make too much movement or sound to wake your husband next to you. although that was pretty unlikely anyway considering how he slept.

you sigh lightly, holding your head in your hands trying to mitigate the damage.

your head starts drifting off, as it did on most nights these days. it seemed the only thing that ever worked to stop the pounding in your head was thinking about her.

▂▂⌇

funnily enough, sana was actually the reason you and frank had met.

it had happened when the both of you were at a bar after class celebrating the end of exams. sana being sana had made a whole group of friends 10 minutes upon entering the establishment. you were sitting back watching her challenge someone to down the most shots in one minute. you would have stopped her on another day but after the hell week she's been through with her finals, you figured she deserved it. and you'd be there to take her home afterwards anyway.

she's whooping and jumping around, turning back to you with a grin when she wins. the poor loser skulking away back to his friends.

frank goes up to her then. introducing himself with that kind voice of his, just making sure she had someone to go home with and look after her.

and sana adored the attention. she's flirting with that charm of hers that no one could resist. but strangely enough, frank resisted. he was a gentleman, not wanting to pursue anything while sana was intoxicated, instead, he asked who could look after her, and sana points to you.

▂▂⌇

you're not getting back to sleep. instead you silently step out of bed, grabbing your phone and the hidden pack of cigarettes you kept in the second drawer of your bedside cupboard.

you step outside onto the balcony, breathing in the cool night air, shivering a little as you wrap the blanket you left on the balcony chair around you.

you click the lighter on, the small flame illuminating the darkness of the night, the only other light source aside from the moon. you're thinking if sana's somewhere she can see the moon right now while you put the lighter to the end of your cigarette. is it night for her? was she asleep? did she ever think about you?

you bring the stick to your mouth, inhaling, feeling the roughness of the nicotine hit your lungs, and exhaling softly, watching the wisps of smoke dissolve into the night sky.

sana hated when you smoked. frank didn't like it too much either, but he was never able to stop you.

▂▂⌇

"do you have to do that here?" sana's frowning when you release a puff of smoke into the air.

"sorry. stressed." you mumble in response, cig still stuck between your lips.

"you know i can help with that. just not when you taste like an ashtray." sana's still staring at the cancer stick you're sucking on with contempt, she never hated anything but if you had to place your money on something it'd be your bad habit.

you're smiling sheepishly, taking the cigarette out of your mouth and smooshing the end until it's not burning anymore.

the frown on her face is gone immediately, she's charmed you listen to her so easily. and she sticks to her word, stepping closer and leaning in.

your lips meet lazily, she's got a hand on your cheek, the other at your waist. you're wrapping your arms around her hips, holding her against you as your lips slot against each other.

sana was an attractive woman. there was no doubt about that. the two of you had met during high school. she had caught you sneaking off for a smoke during P.E. and had somehow convinced you to go and get your nails done with her instead. ever since then you two had been inseperable.

it was after you broke up with your first boyfriend in college that you started sleeping together. you remember he had decided to call it off because he was going all mormon and was ashamed of having had sex already, calling you a 'sex-addicted whore who was sent by the devil to tempt him into the flames of hell'. sana despised that he made you feel unwanted, and even more that he blamed you for the break up. she needed you to know just how valued you were, just how wanted you were, and in her drunk dazed mind that meant worshipping you until you came crying under her. and in your drunk dazed, heartbroken, self-pitying mind, you let her.

when it happened again, and again, and again, and then not under any alcoholic influence, the both of you decided to continue seeking each other out for sexual relief whenever you were stressed, or in any sort of mood that called for sex. you stopped every time one of you started a new relationship, but you always found your way back into each other's arms eventually.

▂▂⌇

you curse lightly when you reach the end of your cigarette.

picking out another one, you’re repeating your actions, lighting it up, bringing it between your lips, inhaling, feeling it fill your lungs, and then pushing it back out.

there hasn’t been a single day that’s gone by where you hadn’t thought about sana. frank didn’t get it at first. he asked you why you couldn’t just call her, you two were the best of friends, surely it wouldn’t be that difficult to reconnect?

he didn’t know you slept with sana on the night of you and frank’s wedding. doesn’t know the countless times you’ve slept with her before that. doesn’t know sana woke up earlier than you the next day, disappearing into the early morning, no note, no text, nothing. you were too ashamed to try and contact her for weeks after that, it wasn’t until you came back from your honeymoon that you realised you were knocking on an empty door when you tried to find her at her apartment. it was cleaned out, no furniture, no remnants of her, nothing to prove she even existed. you had called her over and over, tears of desperation spilling over, holding back choked sobs that only grew stronger with each voicemail message.

it wasn't until sana's old landlord holding a 'for lease' sign in his hand comes and kicks you out that you finally realise you'd lost her.

after that, your relationship with frank started to deteriorate. what did you expect though? was it sana's fault? if sana hadn't left would you have lived happily ever after, the three of you together?

it took a long time to realise the answer to that was no. you spent years blaming sana for leaving, and when you finally came to the terms that you were the one who drove her away, it was too much to bear.

▂▂⌇

"y/n!"

you smile at the sound of sana calling you in the corridor, turning to meet her hug as she crashes into you.

she starts talking your ear off and you nod along enthusiastically, but suddenly she stops, looks down to your hand, intertwined with someone else's.

"oh. who's this y/n?"

you look over at your newest boyfriend in surprise, almost forgetting he was holding your hand and standing next to you. you tended to forget a lot of things when sana was around.

"oh this is danny. we met at that bar i told you about last week remember?"

"hmm..." she's looking up at him in scrutiny, eyes squinted and eyebrows furrowed. you can feel danny's palms start to sweat under her gaze.

"one week huh? not bad, let's see how long you last, if you go longer than a month then i'll introduce myself to you." sana says then.

"sana!" you're hitting her lightly, flabbergasted at her insinuation.

"what? your last one was like 3 days. you just keep breaking these guys' hearts y/n." she places a hand over her heart dramatically.

danny's tightening his grip around your hand, speaking up, "excuse me, i don’t appreciate you wishing doom on our relationship even before its started. and i wouldn’t want to be introduced to a slut who’s never had a real relationship before anyway.”

sana’s speechless for a second but her face morphs into a scowl quickly after, “okay danny,” spitting out his name, “first rule of being a decent boyfriend? don’t talk shit about your girlfriend’s best friends. let’s see you last another hour after that comment.” she turns to you, raising an eyebrow, “you gonna let him off with that y/n?”

you’re stuck, and danny’s looking at you expectantly.

“sana… that comment was a little uncalled for y’know… you did kinda start this…”

danny’s smirking, looking smugly back towards sana.

“what?! are you serious right now y/n? y’know what? i don’t care. your life and whatever. see you later.” she’s stomping off, your heart sinking as you watch her.

“c’mon babe, forget her. let’s go get sushi.” danny doesn’t wait for a response before he’s pulling you in the other direction.

▂▂⌇

when you wake up again the next day, frank’s gone.

you stumble to your feet, clumsily making your way to the bathroom.

it’s almost late afternoon already. you’re lucky you didn’t have work today.

sana always used to scold you if you woke up past noon. she said you'd waste the whole day sleeping when you could have been spending it with her.

these days the second option wasn't exactly viable.

you cringe a little when you catch sight of yourself in the mirror. unkempt hair, dark circles under your eyes, visible signs of ageing. you'd bet sana still looked as radiant as she was all those years ago.

your phone starts buzzing when you turn on your electric toothbrush. it couldn't be anyone else other than frank. you didn't really talk to anyone else anyway. after sana left, you became a social recluse, and a lot of your friends were technically sana's friends so without that mutual connection anymore, you drifted from them very quickly.

“hello?”

“hey y/n, is my white button-up back from the dry cleaners yet? i need it tonight for this work event.”

“… no you didn’t tell me to pick anything up.”

“what? i left a note for you on the fridge did you not see it?”

“i just woke up frank.”

“it’s 2pm.”

“yeah.”

you can hear him sigh over the phone, “alright it’s fine i’ll pick it up after work.” he hangs up abruptly after he says that.

no goodbye, no i love you, he doesn’t call you by any pet names anymore either, just y/n. well it’s not like you did any of those things for him so you suppose it’s fair. he did do a lot of those things when you were dating and early in your marriage but eventually, when you stopped responding and got more and more tired of being with him, he stopped trying as well. you can’t even remember the last time you were intimate together.

frank had suggested the both of you try out marriage counselling but you were strongly against the idea. you didn’t feel particularly excited about disclosing everything that went on with sana with frank let alone with a complete stranger. you remember that week you fought about it and you ran away and didn’t come back until a month later. frank only tried to call you once during that time.

▂▂⌇

you were standing in front of an apartment door in japan.

you weren’t really thinking when you stood at the front desk of the airport, demanding a ticket for the next flight to osaka with only a small backpack and some essentials you were able to grab after your fight with frank.

it wasn’t until you were physically in the plane that you realised you didn’t actually know anyone but sana there. and you had made that unconscious decision because being with frank was simply too… nothing, and being with sana was… everything. it had been over 6 years since you had seen her last, when she left you that quiet night in may.

though it seems fate was on your side this time. sana’s cousin just happened to be working at the airport the night you arrived, when she recognised you, she was waving excitedly, ushering you over.

“y/n right? oh my goodness i haven’t seen you in so long! not since that time sana brought you here 7 years ago right?” her accent is a little thick but you’re grateful she can speak korean regardless, you could only understand very basic japanese picked up from sana.

you’re nervously rubbing the back of your neck, “ahaha yeah… do you actually happen to have sana’s address?”

she frowns a little, “she didn’t give it to you when she found out you were coming?”

it seems like sana hasn’t told many people about your relationship with her either.

“u-um ahaha no she must have forgotten. you know how she gets… too excited she forgets the important little details.”

the cousin laughs a little in response, agreeing and quickly typing in sana’s address on your phone. internally you’re thanking all the gods and deities you know of for this stroke of luck or you’d really be stranded in osaka with no knowledge of the language and nowhere to stay.

“i have to get back to work but say hi to sana for me! we haven’t seen her much since she came back a few years ago, she’s been really busy with work i think.”

you nod, heart pounding at the tidbits of information you’re getting about sana. anything to fill in the 6 year gap you’ve been apart.

you wave goodbye, thanking her again and then you’re hailing down a taxi and showing the driver the destination on your phone.

so now you’re standing in front of her apartment door, hands sweaty and nervous, just praying she wouldn’t kick you out or worse.

you’ve been standing here stupidly, deliberating when, how, if you should even knock. when there’s a slight commotion to your left, the sound of a bag of groceries dropping and a light gasp.

“y/n?”

it’s very cinematic when you turn, sana coming into view for the first time in so long is like finding water in a desert. you’re drinking her in hungrily, her darker hair, smile lines, perfect nose, she looks just as beautiful as you remember.

“sana…” you’re voice is hoarse with emotion.

she’s taking slow steps towards you after picking up her groceries. one… two…

“what are you doing here?”

“i-i- u-um i-“

“how did you get my address?”

“u-um i saw y-your cousin at the airport and she recognised me and i- i may have asked her for your address... i'm sorry! i would have called or like let you know but... y'know... i-i couldn't really do that..."

she considers you for a little bit, looking you up and down, her face stoic.

"...did you come here for something then?"

"i- um- well not really it was k-kinda an impulse decision. u-um frank and i fought and i just- i don't know i went to the airport and i found myself here i guess..."

you notice how her hand tightens at the mention of frank's name, the slight sound of the crinkling of her grocery bag.

"and what did you want me to do about that?" she's pushing past you now, taking out her keys and starting to unlock her door. you begin to panic, scrambling for words.

"i- sana please! i- i'm sorry! i'm sorry okay?"

the jingling of her keys stops, but she doesn't look back at you.

"what are you sorry for? i'm the one who left remember?" her voice is bitter and a little shaky, you realise she's not facing you because she's trying not to cry. you ache to hold her.

"i… i’m the reason you left though. right? it took me a long time to realise but i’m sorry i wasn’t able to be true to myself and i’m sorry you were a casualty to that. i missed you sana…." your voice is quiet, you feel your own tears welling up in your eyes.

“… what weren’t you true to yourself about?”

you take a big inhale, breath shaky when you let it back out. “that i love you.” your voice is tiny, you just confessed your love for the woman you’ve spent most of your life with, the woman that’s occupied your mind every second of every minute since she’s entered your life. the woman you were too scared to admit you loved, who waited for you to do exactly that only for you to enter a loveless marriage with someone else. you can only imagine the pain you’ve put her through. it would be nothing compared to the last 6 years without her. and the last 6 years without sana were undoubtedly the worst of your life.

sana’s sniffling now, unable to hold back her cries.

you inch forward and tentatively place a hand on her shoulder. when she doesn’t move it, you shift closer again to wrap your arms around her loosely.

suddenly sana’s turning and burrowing her face in your neck, you feel her wet tears stain your skin, but also your own start to run down your face. you're surrounded with sana sana sana, her smell, her sounds, the feel of her against you when you tighten your arms around her. you missed this so fucking much. you missed her. and for the first time in 6 years, you finally felt like you were home again.

▂▂⌇

after you've finished your morning routine, you lazily trudge into the kitchen, discarding the small note frank had told you about, and pouring yourself a bowl of cereal.

you sigh into the empty house. frank wanted kids of course, that's why you bought such a large house in the first place. he had dreamt of the whole white-picket fence family and you were excited to share that with him and sana. she had helped you design the place, decorate it when you first moved in, she was meant to move across the street and you were going to grow old together and watch as your kids played around and became the best of friends, just like the two of you were.

now though? you hated this house. it just felt so much more empty. you and frank had tried for kids, although that only really drove you further apart. sex just became more of a chore than something you enjoyed, and when people know you're trying to get pregnant? suddenly everyone has their 2 cents on what you should eat, what types of exercise you should do, the latest superfood that was meant to make you more fertile. everyone seemed to have more control over your own relationship, over your own body than you did.

eventually, the small amounts of love you and frank had for each other, fizzled out. and you decided you didn't want to raise a child in a loveless marriage, that wouldn't be fair to them. frank, even with his endless optimism and kind soul, agreed.

▂▂⌇

that night in japan, for the first time in six years since you saw sana, you were able to kiss her again, to feel her bare skin against yours, to taste her as she writhed and cried out your name above you.

you woke up before her the next day, sun sluggishly making its way past the horizon. you watched as her breaths came in and out, soft, her expression at peace, not clouded with anger or sadness at you. you traced the lines of her face, recollecting every single hair, every mole, every perfection and imperfection on her, so she'd always be with you in your memory.

she stirred after a while, blinking softly and you wait for her to come to, fingers tracing soft lines over her side.

you feel her freeze under you, breathing picking up, just barely noticeable but you were sharing the same airspace. her eyes meet yours for the first time that morning and you're committing the brown irises to memory now as well.

"you didn't leave." her voice is laced with morning fatigue.

you only hum in response, continuing to trace random shapes into her skin.

"why?"

you take a moment to think about your answer. years ago, you would've been terrified with the idea that someone would've found out about the two of you. that someone would know your dirty little secret. and that secret was that you were in love with your best friend. it was different for sana. sana was flamboyant, and proud, and happy. it wouldn't matter who sana liked because that didn't take away from her personality. she was still valuable as a person. you weren't like that though. you were always just sana's best friend or danny's girlfriend or frank's girlfriend or whoever else you dated at the time. the moment you deviated from that, a new label would be stuck on you, and people would pity sana, talk about how she could do so much better, how you were a witch who lured sana in. so you were selfish. you took from sana, and you never gave back. because sana was perfect in your mind, and she didn't need anything else.

"i'm sorry. there's a lot to be sorry for and a lot i need to make up to you. but at the core of it all, i love you sana. these six years without you have been hell. and i'm sorry it took that long for me to realise this, but i love you, not frank, not anyone else, just you."

you feel your eyes begin to tear up, heavy with emotions, sana's mirroring you, her bottom lip slightly quivering.

"what happened with frank?" her voice is a little shaky.

"we fought. i didn't want to deal with him anymore, my feet took me to the airport, and i ended up here."

sana sighs then, turning away from you and lying on her back. "so you're still together?"

"well... i- no but-"

"how is this time any different then y/n?"

"i- i- it's over, me and him. seeing you again has affirmed that for me. there hasn't been love between frank and i for a long time. i never loved him the way i love you. i'm ending things as soon as i get back. i promise sana. please- please believe me." you're scrambling a little, you couldn't afford to lose sana again. not after you had just gotten her back.

you can see tears running down the side of her face. you hate yourself for making her cry. that seems to be all you ever made her do.

"okay."

"okay?"

she turns to you again, wiping at her eyes, "okay. i really shouldn't but i love you too much and i've missed you too much to say no."

"really?" your perking up, disbelief clear.

"you keep asking me that and i'll change my mind." she teases, smiling for the first time.

you're overjoyed. rolling onto her and sweeping her up in a kiss, hoping your actions convey your feelings for her better than your words do. she's laughing into you and god have you missed that sound. you attack her sides immediately, almost desperate to hear it again, to make her feel something other than the sadness you've caused her. you make a promise to yourself in that moment, that you'd never, never make sana cry again.

it took you only a month to break that promise.

▂▂⌇

"hi, frank's wife right?"

you resist the very strong urge to roll your eyes, instead nodding politely and listening as the woman who approached you launches into a conversation about her husband and how he and frank got along at work and really you couldn't care less.

you were at the work event frank had mentioned in the morning. he did end up picking up his own dry cleaning and you saw him briefly at the event when you first showed up, only saying a quick hello and kissing your cheek before he was off again mingling and entertaining guests.

you had intended on just sticking to the bar and making use of the free-flow alcohol but now this woman was talking to you about her kids, and whatever else and you really just want to throw your drink in her face and yell at her about how to read a room.

you spot frank in the corner of your eye, surrounded by a group of women. you knew he had slept with other people ever since you stopped accepting his advances and affection. you're honestly surprised he hasn't asked for a divorce yet.

but frank was kinder than you. you were still his friend before you were his wife. he still cared about you and didn't want you to be left alone. you couldn't seem to convince him you were fine alone. you learnt to be fine when sana left. although lately, even he seemed to see you less as a friend and more and more, just as his wife.

▂▂⌇

"i still can't believe that time you thought danny was a good choice for you. and you defended him too!" sana was laughing, slapping your arm playfully.

you whine in response, "i told you i was sorry for that alright!!"

she's still laughing when frank comes back to the two of you, looking at you inquisitively and gesturing vaguely towards sana. you shrug, helping him set the food he had ordered for the three of you on the table.

"what's funny sana?" he asks, sliding into the booth with you and picking up a burger.

sana's waving a chip around now, pointing at you, "just talking about y/n's shitty taste in men."

frank fakes shock, looking at you with an exaggerated look of hurt, "me?"

you laugh, hitting him lightly, "not you dummy."

"yeah you're one of the good ones franky. probably the only good one out there."

"aww thanks sana."

sana grins, digging into her food.

you smile at the two of them. your two favourite people in the world. when you first met frank, you were skeptical of him. you were sure he was only trying to be friends with you to get with sana. so imagine your surprise when he had actually been plotting with sana behind your back to ask you out. you had said yes of course, he was a sweet guy, attractive too, and most importantly, sana liked him.

you ended up hitting it off, and the three of you were almost inseparable after that.

it wasn't until about 7 months into your relationship that sana started distancing herself. she would say she was busy, turn down more offers to go out, start hanging around a new group of people.

you heard from frank later that they had some sort of disagreement, which was why sana had started avoiding you. you were hurt by this though, because sana was still your friend. she was yours before you were frank's, and even when you were frank's you were still hers. didn't she know that? she had to.

you intended for her to know that when you cornered her, a late afternoon on a friday when the three of you used to go out for ice-cream as a reward for the week's end, but she had been staying behind to study or always had something else on instead.

"why are you avoiding me?"

sana's eyes are everywhere, her movements skittish as she tries to look for an escape before giving up and huffing. "i don't know what you're talking about."

"yes you do."

"no i don't."

"stop this sana. frank told me the two of you fought. if you don't want to be around him fine. that's your choice. but that doesn't mean you get to avoid me too."

she looks at you then, eyes fiery, "is that what he told you?"

you nod, "i don't understand sana. i don't care that you fought. i can seperate us and my relationship with frank. you're still my best friend."

"we fought because he told me he felt like i was stealing you from him."

"what?"

"yeah. he said he never got to spend any time with you. i was always there. he felt like he was the one who was third-wheeling our relationship."

the words third-wheel and our relationship swim around in your mind, "w-what? that's impossible!"

"is it really though y/n?" sana's voice is soft now.

"what do you mean?"

"i mean, is it really impossible for you to see us that way? frank obviously did, and he felt threatened by that."

"w-what- sana what are you talking about?"

she sighs a little in frustration, and then suddenly she's yanking you forward by the collar and planting her lips against yours. you react automatically, kissing her back, hands immediately going to her waist as you revel in the feeling of her soft lips against yours. it was always so different kissing sana compared to all the other guys you've been with. you chalked it up to the fact that sana took care of her skin, her lips, the way she smelled, all of that made kissing her that much sweeter.

but then you remember frank and you're pulling away, breaths heavier than they were mere seconds ago. "what the fuck sana?!" you're whipping your head around, looking to see if anyone had seen the two of you. it seemed to be clear.

sana's chuckling lowly, wiping at her lips, face downcast.

"what were you thinking?! i'm with frank! you set me up with frank!"

her eyes meet yours again, and you're taken back by the glassy look on her face. she's whispering, "i know. i know and i hate myself for it. i thought- i thought if- i thought i could get over this if i saw you happy with someone else. and then you were! and i just felt worse y/n. and then frank could tell and that was the last straw i guess. i needed to be away, away from you so i could get make these stupid feelings go away. i'm sorry y/n i'm so so sorry."

you're dumbfounded, staring at her blankly when she starts sobbing, hands coming to wipe at tears falling faster than she could catch them.

you don't understand what this means, what you felt, all you knew in that moment was sana was crying. the person you cared about most in the world was crying and you were the reason for it. so you do the one thing to make her stop. you tilt her chin up, heart breaking at the sniffles and the watery eyes, and you press your lips against hers again.

you end up where you've ended up so many times. legs entangled, sweaty bodies on sheets, heavy breathing, and minds lost.

▂▂⌇

you couldn't stand being inside anymore. it was suffocating.

you breathe out smoke as you exhale, the cigarette end still burning.

you watch as someone makes their way outside, shuffling around a little in their pockets and cursing when they realise they don't have a lighter.

the person looks towards you and you hold out yours. you help them light the end of their cigarette and nod when they mutter their thanks, inhaling the smoke into their lungs and standing awkwardly to the side.

it's a few minutes here in the cold, and you're almost finished your cigarette, about to throw it away when the stranger speaks up.

"do i know you from somewhere?"

you pause, looking back, you don't think you recognise this person. "you must have me confused for someone else, i'm sorry."

"wait... no you're sana's best friend right!?"

you drop the cigarette in your hand in shock. it had been a long time since someone had said that name out loud. she only ever lived in your head, it was hard to believe she was someone to other people too.

"right yes of course i remember now! i'm momo i was sana's roommate in college. although you probably don't remember i think we only really met like once. sana was always with you around campus and posted you a lot though so i remember you."

you vaguely recall the woman as she chatters away excitedly.

"right... momo... it's nice to meet you. i'm y/n."

momo grins, "have you spoken to sana lately? i don't think i saw you at the wedding, although i may have just been drunk." she chuckles a little at herself, not realising the way your face drops.

"wedding?"

momo looks at you a little in confusion, "yeah. last month? sana got married in sapporo."

your head is spinning with the new information. sana was married?

“woah you feeling okay?” momo’s reaching out for your shoulder, steadying you. you didn’t even realise you had lost your balance.

“i-i- yeah sorry.”

“you sure? are you here with anyone? anyone i can call?”

“no. it’s okay, thank you though.”

“yeah no problem.”

she’s shuffling back again, sucking on her cigarette.

“sana and i haven’t spoken in years. i was just a little surprised is all.” you speak up when you feel a little steadier on your feet.

“oh shit! i’m so sorry y/n i had no idea!”

“it’s okay, it seems no one really does.” you laugh a little bitterly.

momo doesn’t know how to respond to this, flicking her eyes between you and the door.

“it’s fine though. i’m happy for her.” the words taste vile on your tongue. is this what sana felt when she watched you walk down the aisle on your wedding day?

momo softens a little, “she is happy.” she offers you a kind smile, tapping out her cigarette and mumbling a quick thanks before heading back inside.

once you're sure she's gone you let yourself break down. sobs wrack your body as you hold your hands over your mouth trying to quiet them. you can barely see through the tears streaming out of your eyes. this was it. you'd finally lost her. you couldn't cling to the delusion that somewhere out there, some of her still belonged to you, some of her happiness, her memories, her love. you'd lost all of that now.

▂▂⌇

"what was that y/n?"

"what?"

"don't fuck with me right now. that was frank wasn't it? on the phone just then?"

you sigh, pinching the bridge of your nose, "what do you want me to say sana?"

"that you're keeping your promise. that you're going to return to him, break up with him, and then you're going to come back here to me. and then we can finally start our lives together."

"it's not that easy sana."

she explodes, "what do you mean?! it is that easy y/n! you told me when you came here that you and frank were over. have been for years. and now you can't tell me that same thing?"

"i don't- no sana-"

"what? what y/n? what’s your excuse now? do you have to make sure your job is secure? after you've spent a whole fucking month here you expect me to think you still care about that? do you have a child with him? is that it? is he sick? what other possible excuse is there for 'it's not that easy sana'?!"

"you don't get it! you can't say that to me sana!"

"what?! what don't i get?! tell me y/n, let's sort this shit out right fucking now. tell me why you can't be with me."

"it's not- that's just the way i am sana! i can't-"

"you told me you loved me. was that a lie then?" her eyes are brimming with tears, anger evident and your heart breaks again. you promised, you promised her and you promised yourself that this wouldn't happen again.

you're quick to step in again, trying to stop her from crying the one way you know how, brushing her cheeks with your thumbs and kissing her.

she doesn't let you get away with it this time though. she rips away from you, placing a hand on your chest and pushing you back lightly, keeping you literally at arm's length.

"don't do that." she's chuckling, her laughs mixed in with quiet sobs, "don't think you can just kiss away your problems. that's not how real life works y/n."

"please sana, please just-"

"what? you want me to be okay being your secret again? you want to be able to go around in public with frank only to come home to me? you can't have both y/n! i'm not going to do that again for you!"

you’re both crying now, standing across from each other in sana’s apartment, a place that’s felt more like home to you in a month than your place with frank has felt for you in six years.

your voice comes out in a hoarse whisper when you speak up, ��i can’t- i can’t feel like this sana.”

sana’s wiping at her eyes with the sleeve of her sweater. then she’s turning on her heel and heading into the bedroom.

you follow her, you’d follow her anywhere, but your heart sinks when you realise she’s going around the room picking up your belongings and shoving them into your bag.

“w-wait s-sana, what- what are you doing? stop please-“

you’re almost begging, scrambling after her trying to pull her back but she’s stubborn, she’s able to fill the bag within a minute and then she’s pushing it into you, and out the door.

“please! sana please i can’t lose you again don’t do this please- you’re my best friend sana.”

she’s managed to successfully push you out the front door now, still crying. “but you’re not mine y/n. you were never my best friend. you were always the love of my life. and you can’t be that for me anymore. so leave. please. don’t try and find me again.”

“n-no sana please d-don’t-“

“you’d have to stop the world just to stop what you feel for me y/n. but you don’t realise that. and i’m sick of loving someone who can’t give me all of that love back.”

and then she’s slamming her door shut in your face, the both of you sobbing on opposite sides of the door, hearts shattered a second time, and later, when it happens a third time, it’s only the sound of yours breaking.

[needle-thread-thimble-spear]

RGU and the Transfeminine, Part 1

OR

Why Miki Kaoru is an Egg

Fig. 1: The Sunlit Garden

When I’d first watched through Revolutionary Girl Utena, Miki Kaoru was initially one of the characters I had the hardest time figuring out. Unlike the other poisoned sibling relationships in the show, Miki and Kozue’s didn’t really make much sense to me. I couldn’t decide how I felt about the character, whether he was “better” somehow than Touga, Saionji, or Akio, or if he was “just as bad”. And of course. What the hell is with that damn stopwatch dude??* Looking at fan writings afterward just deepened the confusion. Everyone seems to have a different opinion on what’s going on with Miki. It’s only after much re-watching, and introspection, that I think I’ve figured out why I’m so conflicted about the character. I’d like to share why- and hopefully along the way I can at least show that Miki is more interesting than many give him credit for. Click the readmore if you please!

(And, to be clear, what is written below is a reading, a blend of evidence from the text, from the subtext, and my own personal experience. I do not claim to be the first to interpret the character this way nor do I claim that this is the definitive read of the character. Nonetheless, I hope I can make my case to you!)

and, a big thank you to @empty-movement for collating all the high quality screengrabs and scans in this post!

Fig 2: Rookie Princes

While I’m not the first to notice, I think it’s frequently overlooked just how similar Utena and Miki are in the first arc. It’s definitely something that flies over the heads of many first-time viewers. But Miki and Utena, are extremely alike! Of course, they are both motivated by an unattainable image of the past, and Miki’s early episodes codify the “sunlit garden” into the RGU symbolic environment. But it’s more than just this. Utena and Miki both treat Anthy in basically the same way. Utena has an easy time convincing Miki that the dueling game is objectifying nonsense. That the principled thing is to leave the whole exercise behind and treat Anthy like a person. It isn’t very hard for Miki to convince Utena to duel him for her hand either. They both view themselves as her personal protector, and (while maybe at different times), both project their imagination of what she must be thinking onto her. Utena does a bit more than Miki to try and figure Anthy out, but it doesn’t take much for her to get swept up in her own image of prince. In both their minds, Anthy needs them to save her. And, when Anthy looks them in the eyes, and tells them. I’m not yours. It destroys them. Freezes them in their tracks, breaks their hearts. Screaming, its a lie, you can’t mean that! Of course they get along so well! They see themselves in one another, plain as day. Little rival princelings, seeking the affections of the same princess, but always with chivalry and good intention.

Fig 3: Heartbreak

But I think there is more to it than that! Miki and Utena (and later Nanami) are some of the youngest duelists (at least, without a black rose anyway). And, they have fairly similar relationships to the other members of the student council. Juri acts as an older friend, mentor, and source of advice for both of them. Its not unlikely that she sees her younger self in the two of them, and while she does very directly take this out on Utena, its her sword that Utena takes to her second duel with Touga. Indeed, Touga manipulates Miki and Utena in unsubtle and sexually aggressive ways, as compared to how he might treat Saionji or Juri. And for both, its their relationship to gender that he directly attacks. He attempts to break Utena’s spirit by turning her “back into a normal girl”, and for Miki he seems to challenge his masculinity. And while this may seem as though the two of them are being shoved in opposite directions, in both cases, Touga hits them in the same place. “You’re a prince then? I don’t think so. Unless you prove it”. Touga isn’t the only one to question Miki’s ability or status. Utena and Juri both tell Miki. You are much more suited to playing piano than dueling. The main difference here is that they tell him this with genuine compassion, but the implication is the same. You aren’t suited to this prince thing. Give it up.

I don’t think it’s just the audience who is conflicted slotting in Miki with the other “men”.

Fig 4: Strange Friends

Much ink has been spilled on Miki and Kozue’s relationship, but I do think there is one thing consistent across readings. There is a power struggle going on between them, and they’ve both got something to hold over the others head. Personally, I don’t believe there is any attraction between them. Rather, What’s Going On With Those Two is their mismatch in understanding their sexuality and the RGU concept of “Reality”, and the friction that creates in their image of themselves and one another. That reading may go as follows. Miki sees Kozue as acting dangerously and immorally. In his mind, she is his responsibility, to keep out of trouble at the very least. Perhaps he sees himself as needing to step in for their absent parents. So he sees himself as the mature and grounded one, a father figure needing to keep the both of them on the straight and narrow. Kozue on the other hand, sees Miki as being essentially blind to Reality (with a capital R). She believes he doesn’t have a good grasp of what sex is, or what adult relationships look like. She may believe that she understands what happened with their parents much better than Miki, and clearly sees that her brother is in danger with his creepy music teacher. So she sees herself as the mature and grounded one, needing to protect her brother both by warding off people who would take advantage of him and by getting him to grow up and see things as they Really are. Without their parents, they feel the need to take care of one another and control how the other approaches their sexuality. But in the end, it does seem that Kozue is the one who is better able to manipulate Miki’s behavior, helping Akio convince him to duel a second time. That Miki needs to grow up and accept what he wants. He sees a vision of Anthy, and he’s driving the akiomobile. And, with fearful realization, he discovers the identity of End of the World.

Fig 5: Fear

So then. Why should Miki be so hung up about his sexuality? It clearly makes him very uncomfortable. And why does he compare the sister he had in the past onto the one he has in the present? What’s so special about that sunlit garden, anyway? What is Miki Kaoru’s shining thing?

Let me spin a yarn, if you'll indulge me-

As far as Miki remembers it, when he was little things were perfect. His parents were still there, and he and his twin sister were thick as thieves. They would play piano together, and drink milkshakes. Things were simple and happy as far as he’s concerned, and while his childhood was not nearly as rosy as he remembers, it was certainly better than whatever he has to deal with now. Now his parents are gone for reasons he doesn’t quite understand, and his sister has drifted away from him and acts promiscuously. His body is starting to change, and it fills him with disgust. Worse still, he finds himself envying his sister for some reason. It all floods him with shame. He needs to fight those feeling with everything he has. Being very clever for his age, he finds himself the youngest member of the student council. He becomes involved with the dueling game as it is revealed to him, and goes along with it, not wanting to act out of place. He gets a crush on Anthy, and is unable to figure out what the hell he should do about it. Later, he meets Utena, and the two become fast friends. And how lucky, his new friend is roommates with his crush! She’s just so perfect. She’s kind, and quiet, and chaste, not at all like his sister. He feels a kinship with her. And in an act of cosmic fate- she plays for him his favorite childhood arrangement. It’s just as Touga says. He can’t let the world get to her, the way its getting to his sister. The way its getting to him. He needs to make sure that Anthy, and his memories, are safe. But alas- it seems she doesn’t feel the same way. She’d rather be with Utena. Hopefully, Utena can protect her where he cannot. Miki and Utena go back to being friends, and he nurses his hurt feelings privately. It wouldn't do to make a scene about it, and besides, it wasn’t appropriate for him to think of her like that anyway. Thinking about anyone like that. He can’t help but feel disgusted with himself for allowing it. Later, his relationship with his sister continues to deteriorate, and his father is remarrying. But he can stick by his principles, and stay out of it all, the dueling especially. Kozue, Touga, and Akio have other plans. He is confronted with Reality, and it terrifies him. He sees himself in the drivers seat, Anthy his. This is what he is now, no point in trying to hide from it. He challenges Utena again, taking an early advantage utilizing his new resolve and Utena’s confusion. But that resolves breaks quickly. What is Kozue doing with Anthy?

Pay attention, or you’ll lose.

Fig 6: Crash!!

Miki is disgusted with himself, his role, because he does not want it. He hates what’s happening to himself and his family. He admires Utena and Juri, for embodying his ideal self. He listens to Touga, puts up with his music teacher, even if they make him feel gross and uncomfortable, because he feels he has to and that he doesn’t have a choice. He idolizes Anthy, so much. He is attracted to her, but maybe there is something more. Maybe, Miki wishes he could be her. Miki, in my mind, is a closeted trans lesbian going through puberty as a boy. I think that part of this might be projection, perhaps. But I hope that I might have made my case using the text of the show. But even if you disagree, I hope that you might have a better appreciation for his character. I think he’s fairly consistently people’s least favorite council member as a character, but honestly he’s my favorite and I think there’s a lot more too him than a lot of people give him credit for.

Fig 7: Three Lesbians Hanging Out

… this all being said. I think it’s interesting that Miki thinks Anthy is the picture of femininity right? That this is what he wants.

In the end, all girls are like the rose bride.

Please wait patiently while I make the case, that while Miki is an egg. Anthy has long since hatched...

(And I do mean be patient! This subject, and the concept that Ohtori represents a transmisogynystic institution at its very core, is WAY more personal than this headcanon, and also is much more of a difficult thing to write for dozens of reasons. I'm still not 100% sure it would even be right of me to post my thoughts on that publicly. But if enough people are interested, maybe that would motivate me to write it!)

*What’s a good Miki essay without some sort of Stopwatch Theory tm? Well (and I freely admit much of this is probably projection, but it’s not just me projecting! It’s also my girlfriend!!), Miki seems to get very wrapped up in his own thoughts. He is very self conscious, takes the criticisms of others very seriously, and also seems to get ideas about How Things Are Going To Happen in his head. He desperately tries to make sense of his surroundings, and finds himself consistently failing to do that. So my guess is the stopwatch is a way for him to regulate and calibrate his thoughts and hypotheses and self image. He picked it up in his duty as council secretary, but its something he feels is significant outside of that. Aha moment? Click. Unexpected end to a council meeting? Click. Something go completely as expected? Click. It helps him process I think. That is my formal Stopwatch Hypothesis tm.

Supplement Fig 1: Stopwatch

[art-is-the-life]

just for one night, please?

paring: joel miller x reader

words: 2.6k

i wanted to write a little thing because honestly joel has my whole heart. i don't usually post on this blog, and especially not writing but you know. there are no physical descriptions of the reader but there are a few uses of the nickname "honey" throughout. also i wrote this with the "sharing one bed" trope. technically there are two beds, but joel and reader only use one, anyway i digress. no smut only fluff! the only editing was grammarly so please forgive me. anyway, enjoy!

--------------------------------------------------------

“Shit..” Joel half-whispered in front of you, raising his hand to rub across his jaw. 

Looking into the dimly lit room the two of you just broke into, you notice the source of Joel’s expletive.

“One—” you begin to say, but you’re suddenly interrupted.

“Bed!” Ellie shouts, bringing up the rest of your trio, and Joel glares at her. She cringes with a falsely guilty smile and pushes you and Joel past to head into the shabby hotel room.   

“This place ain’t good, honey,” Joel begins in a low tone while Ellie tosses off her pack and flops on the bed. A dust cloud poofs around her when she hits the moth-bitten sheets, and you smile sheepishly and Joel. The name makes your heart flutter, but you push it away with a mental shake. You can’t be doing that.

“At least it has a bed?” You offer the same sheepish smile with your shoulders up to your chin in a defensive manner. 

“C’mon, old man, lighten up!” Ellie calls from the bed, looking up at the two of you huddled nervously around the door. 

“It’s just one night, Joel,” you sigh and look around the highly dusty room, “You don’t even have to sleep in the bed; you can keep watch all night.”

Joel follows your eyeline around the room until he meets your face again. He takes a moment to glance over your face, and you try to smile more convincingly. Behind you, Ellie is starting to snore, which you take as a sign. Gesturing to her on the bed, you tilt your head towards Joel, and he rubs his hand again across his jaw. 

“Please, Joel? This is one of the only places where we have been covered from the elements since we left Bill and Frank’s.” You put on your best doe eyes. “Please?”

“Fine, just tonight,” Joel grumbles, and you smile bigger, “But I don’t want you on second watch.”

You shrug, “Works for me.” You pull Joel further into the room and shut the door behind you. It’s a little beat up from the force you used to get in, but it still latches, so you consider it a win. You walk over to the bed in the corner and glance at Ellie, who is now sleeping soundly on her side and snoring quietly.

You sigh and grab her pack from where she abandoned it on the floor. You sling yours off and prop them up against the small kitchen island with a slight frown. Unzipping yours and digging through it for a moment, you find a slightly crushed granola bar you snagged from Bill’s apocalypse bunker. Ironic. You hear Joel rustling behind you, so you pause for a moment to listen to his heavy boots tread around the probably rotting floor of this old hotel. 

When you stand up, you notice another door slightly ajar, and it looks like it has something interesting in it. Slipping your gun from your hip, you slowly walk towards the door and nudge it open with your foot. Looking around carefully, you can see no Infected in this room either. You breathe out heavily in relief, poking further into the room. It looks identical to the room you, Joel, and Ellie broke into. One bed with a tiny kitchen and a large water stain leading out of a closed door. You think for a moment you should go in, but then Joel calls your name. 

“Another room?” Joel asks when you turn to see him leaning against the doorway you just went through.

“Looks like it, probably one of those old package deals where you can buy both rooms and have your kids in one and you in the other,” you reply, gesturing around the room with your gun while being careful not to point it near Joel. 

“‘S got another bed and everything, huh, honey,” Joel says, keeping his voice low to not wake Ellie. 

“Yeah, seems like it.” You respond and trail off slowly, putting your gun back where it’s stored on your hip and pointing to the closed door with your elbow. “What do you think is in there? It’s got a stain, and I want to assume it’s water.”

“Maybe it’s best not to check,” Joel says, but you huff nervously.

“What if there is something in there?” You mumble with a nervous flit at the end of your sentence.

You watch Joel’s jaw tick momentarily as he considers the options. On the one hand, you don't want to go in there and have to suddenly flee because you woke up something, or you just leave it and everything is fine. Or, again, in the worst-case scenario, you’re all bitten in the middle of the night, Ellie is left all alone, and this whole mission would be for nothing. 

“Joel?” You ask nervously again, and he shrugs. He’s more nonchalant than you want him to be about this, but you suppose at least one adult needs to be calm right now.

“I guess we gotta look,” he responds with his jaw still clenched. Slowly pulling out one of his many guns, Joel strides purposefully past you towards the door. You follow him, once again slowly pulling your gun back out along with a flashlight, and routinely cross your wrists over one another. Just like Tess taught you to. The thought makes your heart ache, so you push the idea from your mind and focus on the task at hand. 

Joel reaches the door, you right behind him. He turns the handle slowly, pushing the door open, and you both point your flashlights into the room, frantically searching for something that doesn’t seem to be there. You sigh in relief, and Joel seems to do the same because you can see his shoulders deflate slightly.

“Nothing,” you say, “Nothing is good, right?”

“Nothin’ is good,” Joel says, “Must’ve just been a leak that happened before the water was all turned off.”

“Right, right..” you take the arm of Joel’s jacket and pull him from the dark bathroom. Turning off your flashlight and tucking it and your gun into your right hand, you glance at the other bed.

“Y’know, this place is pretty secluded, and we haven’t seen anyone in this hotel. Maybe you don’t have to keep watch, just for tonight?” You try to keep your tone even and casual and not too suggestive of you and Joel sleeping in the same bed.

Immediately, this seems like a terrible suggestion because Joel tenses back up again and shakes his head, “No, I gotta keep watch. It‘s not safe no matter what.”

You straighten back up in response and nod quickly, “Yeah, yeah, you’re right.. Sorry. I’ll just take this bed and leave you to keep watch.”

Joel notices your stiffness and quickly shifts his demeanor, “Honey, don’t be like that.”

“Nah, I understand; please, go; I gotta fluff these sheets out,” you reply with a half-shrug, using just one of your shoulders.  

You begin to pull back the sheets, but Joel grabs your hand. You look up at him with wide eyes, and he looks back at you with an unreadable expression. He sighs and runs his free hand through his hair. 

“I didn’t mean it like that, honey,” he says in a low and gruff voice. “I just… I can’t sleep in a bed. Not with you.”

Your heart skips a beat. You’re not sure what to say. You want to ask him why, but you’re afraid of the answer. Joel seems to sense your hesitation. 

He takes a deep breath and continues, “It’s not that I don’t want to, it’s just… I don’t trust myself.”

You tilt your head in confusion. “What do you mean?”

Joel looks away, his jaw clenching and dropping your hand. It’s still warm from his and it sends tingles up your arm. “I’m not a good man. I’ve done terrible things. I don’t deserve to be with someone like you.”

You reach out and touch his arm with the same hand he was just holding. “Joel, everyone has done things they regret. It doesn’t make you a bad person.” Joel just shakes his head in reply. 

“You don’t understand. I’m a monster.”

“No, you’re not,” you say firmly. “You’re a good man, Joel. You’re kind and caring, and you’ve protected Ellie and me from so much.”

Joel looks at you, his eyes filled with pain. “I don’t want to hurt you, honey.”

“You won’t,” you say softly. “I trust you.”

Joel nods slowly. He takes your hand again and squeezes it gently. “Thank you,” he whispers and you squeeze his hand back supportively.

You smile. “Come to bed, Joel. We’ll both keep watch.” 

Joel hesitates for a moment, his movements jittery, and then nods. He moves around to the other side of the bed, and you grab the corner of the sheets you are closest to. He holds his side and, in tandem, flips up the sheets and shakes them out vigorously to get the dust out. It works almost too effectively because your eyes start to water, and you inhale too much of the musty, dusty, almost moldy, sheet smell. Trying to suppress your coughs not to wake Ellie, you turn away from the bed while Joel finishes the job with his shirt over his nose.

You slip yourself underneath the sheets when he seems satisfied with a job well done. You move over to make room for him, and he lies beside you. You turn on your side to face him, and he does the same. You just lie there, looking at each other for a long time. You can feel the tension between you, but it’s not bad. It’s a tension that’s filled with unspoken words and desires. Eventually, Joel breaks the silence.

“Goodnight,” he says softly with your name, and you feel your heart clench.

“Goodnight, Joel,” you reply. You close your eyes, but you don’t sleep. You can’t. You’re too aware of Joel’s presence beside you: his warmth, scent, and breath on your skin. You know you’re playing with fire but can’t help yourself. You’re going to do something you regret if you’re not careful. Especially with Eillie in the next room, it’s too risky. As you and Joel lie side by side, the silence is filled with unspoken words and the soft sounds of the night outside the hotel. There aren’t many ambient sounds these days. The hum of electricity or cars rolling down the roads doesn’t happen like before. You feel Joel's hand brush against yours, which shakes you from your thoughts, whether intentionally or not, and your heart skips a beat.

"Are you okay?" Joel's voice is barely above a whisper, rough yet tender.

"Yeah," you reply, turning to face him in the dim light. "Just... a lot on my mind."

Joel nods, understanding. "I get it. It's hard to find peace these days."

You both fall silent again, the air thick with tension. After a few moments, you decide to take a risk. "Joel, about what you said earlier... You're not a monster. You've done what you had to do to survive."

Joel's eyes flicker with pain. "You don't know the half of it, honey."

"Then tell me," you urge gently. "Let me in, Joel. We don't have to carry these burdens alone."

He hesitates, but a look in his eyes tells you he's considering it. Just as he's about to speak, a sudden noise from the other room startles both of you. It's Ellie, mumbling in her sleep. You both relax when you realize she's just dreaming.

"She's been through so much," you say softly, your heart aching for the young girl. "But she's strong, just like you."

Joel's expression softens as he looks at you. "I don't know what I'd do without you and Ellie."

"You don't have to find out," you whisper, squeezing his hand. "We're in this together."

Joel sighs, a sound that's almost a release of the tension he's been holding. "Maybe... maybe you're right."

The moment is interrupted by a scratching outside the door. Both of you instantly go on high alert. Joel sits up, grabbing his gun, and you follow suit, flashlight in hand. The noise gets louder, and you realize someone, or something is outside.

"I'll check it out," Joel says in a low voice, and you nod, staying close behind him.

As Joel slowly opens the door, you shine your flashlight into the hallway. It's empty, but the sound continues. Following the noise, you both move stealthily down the corridor, alert for any signs of danger. You turn a corner and come face to face with a stray dog rooting through some old trash. The relief is palpable as you both lower your weapons. But the idea that a dog got in fills you with dread. What if there is an owner, and this is a human sniffing dog, and soon you’re about to be found.

"Just a dog," you whisper, laughing softly in relief but anxiety clawing at your chest.

Joel seems to be thinking the same thing you are, especially since you’re only on the first floor of the building. It would be possible for other people to find their way into this—people like raiders, who are just as dangerous as those who are infected. Joel stays alert momentarily, watching the dog root around by the other doors. Most of them are boarded up or entirely doorless. The two of you remain silent and still for several minutes; the only sound is your combined breathing, which is slow and steady. But you can feel your heart beating out of your chest, and you're shocked it isn't making an audible sound against your ribcage.

After a while, Joel finally chuckles, too, a rare sound that warms your heart. "Let's get back before Ellie wakes up, freaks out, and wonders where we are."

Back in the room, Joel tightly shuts the door again. You glance around momentarily and pull over one of the only non-broken chairs that used to make up a small dining set in the room. Joel shimmies the chair under the door and looks up to see if most hotels' old locking mechanism remains intact. Finding it hanging off its hinges, you suck in a breath of air. Joel seems satisfied with the chair, so you can trust his judgment. Heading back through the door that connects the room, Ellie is into the room you found; Joel drags over another chair to place under the main door in this room. Even though it was boarded up like most doors in this place, he still fits the chair under in added protection. 

“Good?” You ask quietly, feeling yourself slip slowly out of adrenaline. 

“Think so,” Joel replies gruffly, so you nod in agreement. 

You settle down again, and Joel slips in beside you. Despite locking the doors more securely, Joel still pulls out his handgun and rifle to sit on the molding bedside table. You figure you should do the same so the harsh metal doesn't dig into your skin the whole night. You stay silent while Joel rummages around in his pack for a while and smile when he comes up with a small lantern he took from Bill and Frank’s. A certain sort of calm replaces the earlier tension, and when you turn back to Joel, he’s already looking at you. 

“What?” you ask with a smile, and he responds by wrapping an arm around you and pulling you close.

"Just for tonight," he murmurs, his breath warm against your ear. You can feel your heart skip a beat but appreciate what he does nonetheless. It’s a step in the right direction and at least a little confirmation that you’re not alone in your feelings. So you nod, feeling a sense of safety and belonging in his embrace. 

"Just for tonight," you agree, but deep down, you both know that something has changed between you. As you drift off to sleep, you realize that the walls Joel has built around his heart are starting to crumble, and for the first time in a long time, you feel hope for the future.

--------------------------------------------------------

[pinecipitation]

I am once again up at your ass and asking for smiling friends hcs,,,, can I get fucking uhhhh Charlie and Alan with a crush who can't help but infodump their interests?? Talking about sitting then down and forcing them to watch their favorite movie and just rambling. (This is totally not me projecting in the slightest, nuh uh) THANK YOU WIFE I HOPE THIS IS OKAY TO ASK MWAH

SMILING FRIENDS X GN!READER

HELLO WIFE YES THANK YOU FOR THE ASK!! LEAN IN I HAVE A KISS READY FOR YOU

word count: 800+

warnings: none!!

CHARLIE:

- my guy doesn’t know about shit honestly, I feel like just how in the president election episodes he’d be like “idk idc” but in the end he gets an opinion with the more info you talk about

- of course because it’s YOU, he’d listen though

- you’re more into movies and shows and games than he is, so if the moment is ever dull he’d immediately hit you with the “….soooo,, any new recommendations?”

- boy do you have them

- he honestly enjoys the way you light up talking about the media you’re into, even if he isn’t quite retaining the information

- he doesn’t mind asking about it again just to hear your piece

- he thinks it’s sort of sweet that you get so heavy into a piece of media that you’d defend it to the ground, especially if its media that isn’t too widely liked or known or have much of a fanbase. he thinks it’s cool that he’s that person for you, like he’s getting insider information from a reliable source

- he finds himself seeing the media in the wild and immediately thinking about your thoughts on it, if he sees a figure of a character you don’t like or a poster of an arc you loved he’d be sure to point it out to himself

- will find himself going “man, fuck this character” to himself because of you, immediately shaking his head and wondering what was wrong with him. He didn’t even know the character, but he subconsciously has an opinion on them because of you

- back to you though, he would have a hard time physically sitting down to watch or read what you’re into, or try out a hobby you like, but when the moment comes where you offer watching the series with him he will jump on it without a second thought

- you do talk and pause to rewind certain parts in it, which he usually wouldn’t like people doing, but it doesn’t matter to him. it’s not like he’s watching the show anyways, he’s too fixated on you and how close you two are on his couch

ALAN:

- now he would ACTUALLY know what you’re talking about and pay attention to the movies and series

- usually he would just state he’s seen it or doesn’t care for it, but he’s breaking habits if it’s something you’re visibly excited about

- of course he’s happy to rewatch it though

- “no, I don’t know about it, is it good?” he’s seen the movie four times

- alan the type of man to stare at you blankly and resist the urge to add his own opinions and facts, but stays quiet for the plot

- he does genuinely enjoy having you so vocal about a subject you’re so passionate about, you’re somehow one of the only people he doesn’t get too overstimulated around, plus this way he doesn’t have to talk as much

- the day you offered a movie marathon at his place was a turning point, him taking the day off before just so he can clean and make the place acceptable, going the lengths to get usual movie snacks and blankets and such. this, and him hiding his books and dvds so that you wouldn’t stumble on them and find out he’s been pretending this entire time

- for the sake of the plot we’re ignoring alan being a morning person, in this universe he’s a night owl hence the eye bags

- the marathon goes on for later in the night than you both anticipated, after the first several hours and rambles of explaining you find yourself more and more tired and you pause the movies less and less

- it doesn’t take Alan long to notice that you fell asleep just like that, the blanket around the two of you and the bowl of chips discarded beside you

- he doesn’t care about that though, what he does care about is your head centimeters away from his shoulder

- not feeling even a little tired, he pauses the movie and carefully grabs his phone, sure not to move himself or you and writes down the time and place he paused, sure that you’d want to continue in the morning or another day. he’s also sure to write a small summary of where you two left off, now that you both “watched it together” he can talk back in infodump conversations and not give away that he knows the parts you two didn’t watch

- he’s quick to move when you shift in your sleep, him carefully but rapidly moving his hand from between you two and scooping his shoulder right under your head. you didn’t seem to wake or notice, a small lazy smile of success on his face as the two of you spend the rest of the night on the couch, him on his phone and you resting peacefully on his shoulder.

[choccy-milky]

bruh i need to vent about a rude comment i got on my recent chap and also about clora, cuz its something thats been on my mind for a while now. it has spoilers to my most recent chap tho so im putting it below

so in my most recent chap clora gets hit by the killing curse but thanks to seb sacrificing himself for her, it doesn’t work/she survives. and I got a rly rude comment about how that’s super cringe and that clora is a "shoe horning of every possible manifestation of Mary-Sueism I have ever seen." theyre dropping my fic after almost 500k words bc apparently THAT’S where they draw the line and that "just somehow pulling it out the bag and surviving a killing curse from the power of love. In simpler terms, it’s absolutely cringe worthy" and "forgive me if I rolled an eye at the yet again invincible nature of Clora Clemons-the-one-eighth-Veela-extraordinaire"

BUT LIKE LMAO TELL ME U DIDN’T READ/WATCH HARRY POTTER WITHOUT TELLING ME. that’s literally what happens to harry??but its only cringe when it happens to our "mary-sue" clora? like yeah sure love magic might be a bit cringe but IM LITERALLY JUST PULLING FROM THE SOURCE MATERIAL. of all the things to take issue with in my fic and interpretations, theyre taking issue with something that’s canon BAHAHA.

and since im on the topic of clora being mary sue can I just say I hate the misogyny/internalized misogyny that i've seen some people (NOT A LOT, THANKFULLY) treat her with. like i get it, im not pale and blonde and as conventionally pretty as clora is, but even if I was, is that a reason to hate me?? and does being beautiful and well-liked = mary sue? bc as far as I know, mary sue is a chara who is just naturally amazing at everything and doesnt need to try hard and theyre just inexplicably great for no reason (like mc in the base game BAHHAA) if anything the mary sue in MY fic is seb LMAO (but hes a boy so its ok). like clora has worked hard and studied magic all her life due to being a squib and wanting to make up for not being able to DO it. she isnt good at flying, seb is still better at her than duelling, shes really short sighted when it comes to doing/thinking whats best for others and can be a huge idiot.... and like. the only guys that have even shown interest in clora on a real scale have been seb and leander (and then lawley for blackmail purposes, and also bc he hates seb) so its not like literally everyone is falling over themselves for her?? like her interactions with the main cast of boys (ominis, garreth, amit) theyre all indifferent to her LMAO but still, the fact that shes pretty and guys here and there might look at her and go o shes cute! doesnt make her a mary sue SORRy thats just called being attractive idk its just annoying that ppl automatically see a nice kind beautiful female character without any VISIBLE flaws and go SHES TOO PERFECT!! MARY SUE!! WAH IM JEALOUS! and like I get it bc when I was younger I probs would have been annoyed by clora as well due to my own insecurities and internalized misogyny but hey, how about u just realize that’s ur own problem and your own jealousy, and not a real one HAHAH anyway ive since evolved bc I used to be a ‘not like other girls’ type girl back in highschool. trying to be super tomboy-y bc I thought being feminine was cringe and too basic but now ive embraced it and love girly things and dresses and charas like clora who are still strong and showcase their strengths and weaknesses in subtler ways, and I want to smooch her and make out with her. get behind me clora ill protect you🤺🤺🤺

[signedreality]

BY GOD I LOVE YOUR WORK SO MUCH, EVERY TIME I SEE ANYTHING PUBLISHED I LITERALLY FLIP OUT 😭😭❤️

BUT- I have like the tinniest, and nothing specific request.

Perchance, may I get an established relationship Alastor x reader who is very expressive with their face. I just feel like it’d be the best source of entertainment for him tbh.. Like, Imagine hitting the rock face when he says something gruesome. Or like the most exaggerated shock face. Or just having the reader wiggle their eyebrows for no damn reason at him... (I just am in dire need of something I can relate to..)

Anyway, I just have to say once more I truly do love your work, it’s like a reward seeing you post.❤️💗

ᯓ       EXPRESSIVE

        alastor x reader

ଳ synopsis ; alastor with a reader who's fairly expressive.

ଳ warnings : romance, petnames, mentions of gruesome things, and alastor being silly.

ଳ missive ; i'm delighted to hear you enjoy my broadcast, and i do hope you enjoy! thank you for your sweet words!

now airing ; posin - glenn gatsby

༄.°       the world is a stage, and the stage is a world full of entertainment. in this case, alastor's entertainment is your expressive ways.

༄.°       when he first met you, he was caught off guard by how expressive you were. everything you did had a facial expression to go with it. you were more animated than the cartoons alastor never bothered to watch.

༄.°       of course, since he found your expressions so amusing, he'd note all the things that occurred to make you react.

༄.°       when he talks about gruesome things? he notices how your eyebrows seem to raise while your eyes practically bulge out of your head.

༄.°       when you're shocked? your mouth falls agape while you place your hands on the sides of your head.

"that was a rather interesting outing..." alastor purposefully mumbled so you would hear his words, and with just his luck, your head perked up at the sound of his voice.

"what happened?"

with your question, alastor's grin widened while he tapped the microphone on his cane. "nothing much, my dear! i just simply saw vox breakdancing in the middle of the streets!"

"YOU WHAT!?" to his joy, your scream rang out through the hotel while alastor stared at your expression.

your mouth fell agape within seconds, and you placed your palms on the sides of your head—alastor letting out a chuckle at your action. "DID YOU ACTUALLY SEE THAT!?"

"i'm afraid not, dear—" alastor snickered as a frown replaced your shock, and you crossed your arms in irritation. "i was just pulling your leg..."

༄.°       and this would happen constantly.

༄.°       fibs would be spewed for his enjoyment just so he could see you react, and despite the many times he would do this, you'd still continue to give him reactions.

༄.°       but one day, you gifted him an expression he didn't expect.

"you wouldn't believe it, cher—" alastor's words were cut off as soon as you were standing in front of him, and he noted the way your eyes traveled his form.

"did you change something, alastor? perhaps a new suit or whatnot?" the tone in your voice made the man tense while he noted the gleam in your eye, "because i must say you look handsome—"

and when you wiggled your eyebrows, that about did it for him.

༄.°       after that, alastor figured out that you would constantly flirt wit him, and with your flirts came a new expression he has never seen on you.

༄.°       a very smug one.

༄.°       sooner or later, he flirted back with you all the time just to see that smug look on your face.

༄.°       only for him to hope to wipe it off one day by sealing your lips with his.

⤷ word count ; too lazy to count

© signedreality

🌊        reblogs + hearts + comments are appreciated !

listeners : @simpingoncarmensandiego @ari-hatake24 @heartfeltcherie

[hisokakissmeplz]

Omg ive genuinly had this is my mind for too long but IMAGINEEE JUST IMAGINE where succubus!reader meets hisoka cause she feels his strong aura and energy thinking its gonna be easy an easy target BUT THEN when the succubus!reader teleports in his room at night to gain energy from him, succubus!reader ends up getting her energy decreased by alot since yk succubus only gains energy when they dominate but we all know hisoka aint playin around so the succubus!reader ends up getting dominated by hisoka instead untill they have completely run out of energy and begging from overstim

THIS IS ALOT LONGER THAN I EXPECTED BUT IF YOU DECIDE TO DO IT TYSMMM AND IF YOU DONT THATS FINE TY FOR READING ANYWAYS ‼️🩷

Omg yay

Also sorry this is so late I low-key forgot about it

You were a succubus. An awful one at that. Downright mean and evil.

Always trying to manipulate and use every man you saw. You had to for energy, but you'd be lying if you said you didn't take any pleasure from it. And not just sexually, there was a certain thrill about taking them down and having them at your whim. It did get boring after a while, one man, one same routine round, but it was all you knew.

This time, you decided to go stalking for your next prey at the local arena. It was a real showy place, Heaven's Arena. Cute.

There were strong, body builder type fighters everywhere. Just waiting for you to come and dominante their energy away.

You heard over the intercom a fight that was set up for tonight, a big one at that, some reigning champ or whatever. Might as well go, you thought, what were you doing here anyways if you didn't check out a fight or two.

You reserved yourself a room, thanking the sweet girl behind the counter as she handed you the key.

You prettied yourself up before the fight, hoping to find someone while you were out. You weren't too tired, not yet, but it did help to always have an energy source.

You waited for the fight to begin, sitting near the front row, the guy beside you practically drooling over himself. He wasn't anything special but he was already begging you to dominate him so it was something.

The announcer began calling out the names of the fighters, lights, fire, and the big booms. The crowd cheered and hollered watching them come out on stage. You watched as an interesting, older looking man stepped out, his hair long and white, his clothes looked quite flashy with gold and silver and other shiny metals.

The other man stepped out. His hair was bright red and his eyes a shiny gold. Your eyes taking him in, desperately, like you couldn't see enough of him. His attire was jokerish, his long arms and tall silhouette emerging from the smoke. God he was beautiful. You had to have him.

You watched eagerly as the fight began. You heard the announcer call out different hits, most of which were by the red haired man. He moved so fast, his aura enveloping him and the other fighter. You could feel his energy, powerful and lustful, he was the perfect victim for you. Totally forgetting about the guy beside you, you were on the edge of your seat.

"WAIT!"

The other fighter called out, stopping the red haired man's next attack.

The announcer hollered about it over the intercom, but you were too invested in what you were seeing. The other fighter held his hands up, surrendering, his eyes pleading from his bruised and bloody face.

The announcer called off the fight, awarding the red haired man with the win. Although, he didn't seem pleased, more dissatisfied, like he was disgusted. He won the fight, why was he unhappy? Honestly didn't matter, you were already on your way to introduce yourself to your latest victim.

"You must be Hisoka." You said cheerful, asserted a seductive demeanour with the sway of your hips.

"Ah, yes." He turned around, letting his eyes drift down over your body, before making eye contact. "What can I do for you?"

His voice was like honey, thick and sweet. You could feel his lustful energy growing, easy target. He was already begging.

"I just wanted to introduce myself," You smiled at him, flipping your hair and licking your lips while talking with him. "I'm a big fan."

You let your voice slip into a more flirtatious tone, sticking out one of your hands delicatly.

He took your hand, pressing a soft kiss to your knuckles.

"Always nice to meet a fan." He held your hand in his a moment longer before letting go and turning away to leave. "Bye, bye."

Although he was walking away, you could still feel his strong energy. Something about it, the aura, pooling at your core.

You knew he would be easy prey, you could tell just how eager he would be for you, just from his aura. You could probably get a lot of energy from him, more than you really needed.

That night, you laid in your bed at the arena waiting. Checking the time once again you decided that now was a good enough time as any.

Standing up, adjusting your short red dress, and fixing your hair, you prepare yourself.

Appearing now in Hisoka's room, you could hear the shower running and decided to make yourself comfortable. You sat down in the bed, kicking off your heels and letting you dress ride up a bit as you waited.

Not much longer you heard the shower shut off, not sure why you were getting so excited over just another victim. You watched as he stepped out of the bathroom, drying his hair with the towel before wrapping it around his waist.

As he turned the corner of his room his eyes lit up with surprise only briefly, his face never showing it.

"Oh~" he only barely acknowledged you sitting in the bed, still you persisted, as he went about his room. "Usually I'm more prepared for guests."

"That's quite alright, sorry if I'm being too forward but," you played out your same, tired routine. Blah blah blah You're just so tempting blah blah blah.

Except this time, he interrupted.

"Don't be sorry, I prefer my women a little more forward." He came up to you, resting his hands on either side of you on the bed. "It's more fun that way."

God he was already puddy in your hands.

You wrapped your arms around his neck, bringing him a little closer, leaning in to his ear to whisper.

"How about I show you how forward I can be?" You flipped him over, and straddling his lap on the bed.

He let out a groan at the sudden motion and the feeling of you rubbing against him with only the towel around his waist between you.

He quickly recovered, supporting himself on his elbows and looking up at you. He smirked at you before speaking his his soft, honey like voice.

"As much fun as that sounds," his hand ran up your body and to your hands, rather intimate and sweet, like he was holding your hands. "I think I'll be taking charge."

He let go of your hands and made a small jerking motion. Within a blink of the eye, your hands were stuck to the headboard above you and you were now on your back.

Fucking Bungee gum.

He started first on your thighs, leaving big purple marks all over them before moving to your cunt.

His hands made their way to your hips, pulling you closer onto his face. All you could do was moan when his mouth made contact.

God he was so skilled with his tongue, sliding over your vulva up to your clit again and again before diving in to your sopping hole and slowly running his tongue over your gummy walls before pulling away and blowing on you softly. The cold air making you shiver, you can't help but moan out his name when you see the string of saliva connecting him to your wet cunt.

He must've stayed down there for hours, and all you could do was whine and struggle against your binds as he overstimulated your sensitive pussy.

Yours hands tugged his hair with every movement of his tongue on you, earning a groan from him each time. The vibration of his moans felt so nice against your sloppy lips.

"Hiso-Hisoka please!"

He didn't stop, his mouth didn't even break away from your cunt as he spoke.

"I know, I know."

He sound so soft and comforting, you wouldn't have been able to tell he was violently eating you out if it wasn't for the the muffle of you against his lips.

You knew if he didn't stop you'd pass out soon for m exhaustion, but that was so far away from you right now as you begged for more.

Don't worry though, he'll let you make up that lost energy in the mornings ng when you ride him.

[nqmonarch]

Dream AU Part 2

Characters: Lynx, Serval, and momentary appearance by Gepard (a very short guest appearance)

Part 1: https://www.tumblr.com/nqmonarch/746989980179660800/dream-au-brainrot?source=share

Night began to fall on Jarilo-VI and you had lost feeling in all of your body. You figured if you could die in your dreams then you'd already be dead, but you'd been wandering for what seemed like forever... Until you finally saw another sign of human life, fire. You walked toward the fire like it was your last hope, yet couldn't help but freeze when you saw the figure by it.

Lynx was bundled up nicely, blonde hair peaking out of her hat, and food in her hand. From what you know Lynx she was rather introverted, and although you were sure that she was kind you couldn't help but feel some trepidation in approaching her. As if that one action would lead to her despising you forever.

The snow crunched under your feet as you approached, "Excuse me?" You called out and you noticed her slowly turn over to her, she was languid in her movements.

She looked at you quizzically, "...Can I help you?"

You perked up at her words, nodding, as you took a few steps closer, "I was wondering if I could stay warm by your fire? I've been wandering out here for a while."

"Hm...? Yeah, sure," She then turned her head away from you and turned back to staring at the sky.

As you sat next to the fire, basking in the warmth of it you followed her line of sight and, an aurora, how beautiful. You didn't bother to make conversation, knowing it wasn't something Lynx typically did with people, and instead admired the lights. The warmth was nice but it felt burning against your frozen skin. Lynx at times snuck glances at you, curious about exactly what kind of person would be outside of Belobog seemingly unprepared for its cold and harsh climate.

You raised your hand to the sky, tracing the patterns the aurora left behind. The gleaming lights resembled a whale, and the moment you thought that they shifted a bit and filled out the form of the whale you were imagining.

"What are you doing out here?" Lynx's words were blunt and quick to the point, not wanting to spend any time doing small talk.

You let out a small hum, "This and that, it just happened. Y'know?" She looked at you a bit exasperated but didn't push any further.

The silence between you two was comfortable and as stars began to take the sky, she began to point of some constellations. Despite your odd appearance you felt strangely familiar leaving Lynx to feel at ease with you, to the point of offering you a place to sleep which you gladly accepted. You'd slept before in dreams, it was always an interesting sensation, oftentimes you'd experience memories of previous dreams.

That night though you just dreamed of staring at at many teal pools with marble looking stone as their outline. Trees with leaves of gold and amber watched over the pools, and you were dimly aware of a presence behind you. It was better to reminisce upon the good times of that place than the bad ones, so you remained there spending hours just watching how the water moves.

You woke up still in the chilly landscape of Jarilo-VI. Lynx had offered to return back to Belobog and give you an impromptu tour. It was partially out of her worry for the strange person that appeared in the snow and partially out of curiosity. She was even willing to reach out to her brother to see if he knew who you were.

The city was warmer than you expected, the heaters keeping it the temperature of a warm spring day. The type of spring day that was best suited by the occasional breeze, and a sky with a few clouds. Belobog though was no stranger to such winds, except each gust of wind that hit you brought in cold air from the outside immediately removing any concern you had of how warm the town was.

Lynx had, first, deciding to bring you over to Serval's workshop as she had to catch up with Serval anyway. Neverwinter workshop was a quaint place, whose only sound was that of clocks ticking. Their were small trinkets laid upon the counter when you walked in and their were so many different inventions being showcased you couldn't help but feel overwhelmed. Until your intention was drawn to the woman in the middle.

Long blonde hair with a blue streak and an outfit like a rockstar. "Serval!" You called out almost instinctively smiling.

"You know her?" Lynx asked, of course most people in Belobog did but given your strange behavior, outfit, and where you'd appeared Lynx thought you may've been one of those people who were rumored to come from the sky. Although, she supposed that must just be a myth, she had hoped it was true.

"Who doesn't?" You replied. Serval was a character that didn't get enough screentime or love in your humble opinion. She was a kickass older sister who was willing to stand up for what she believed to be right! And she was also just... so cool!

Even though it was a dream it couldn't hurt to get her autograph right? You skipped over to the rockstar and now, at a closer distance, were truly able to admire her teal blue eyes which were framed perfectly by her long lashes. She was simply breath taking. You were more than lucky to have already met such beautiful characters! Nanook, Lynx, and now Serval! It was a shame your memories of their looks would become slightly blurry once you woke up, the game didn't give them their full justice.

"Can I have your autograph?" You practically begged, excitement seeping into your voice and making it higher. The only problem was you didn't have any paper.

Serval smiled at you-- she smiled at you! You could die happy now. "Of course," and she said yes, you truly were beyond blessed man you'd have to hear her sing another time but... you probably had to wake up soon it felt like you'd been dreaming for a while. Serval cocked her head toward Lynx, "You make a new friend Lynxy?"

Lynx stepped forward to the two of you, some snow on her jacket still melting, "Not really, it's... complicated." She looked at you, as if expecting you to explain.

You perked up about to begin explaining the story of how the two of you met, but then the door opened and a cool low voice called out, "Serval, you need to-- Lynx?" The third and final Landau walked through the door, Gepard was even more beautiful in person as well.

Man, you got to meet all three of the Landaus! Wasn't that lucky? Due to their different jobs they didn't meet together all that much, you remembered. A sharp piercing noise, your alarm, split through your brain, talk about bad timing. Just when you got to meet Gepard, plus you didn't even get your autograph yet!

"Sorry, I have to head out now," You quickly interrupted thinking it would be impolite to leave, even if they were just part of your dream, without saying goodbye. And with that you returned to the waking, much more warm, world. Your blankets were pretty comfortable, you really didn't want to leave them.

Lynx had turned over to look at you, confused at your words and whether or not you were a wanted criminal, but when she did so all she saw was nothing. And when Serval and Gepard also saw the person in front of them disappear in the blink of their eye they were both stumped.

ugh I wanna write more Nanook they're so like babygirl in this AU will prob mention them in part 3 but it'll be like their POV not them and reader meeting again

I love that Serval, Lynx, and Gepard are all like cat related names lol

sorry for the wait i wanna start writing this one original book i have so i can put it into a competition so i've been focusing on that

byebye

[thesapphicdiaries]

an unhealthy obsession ;; ellie w. x abby a. x reader ;; pt. 1

and i'll get done for somethin' stupid like disturbance of the peace. | (ghostface au)

NOTES: this is entirely self indulgent tbh ,,, but fuck it !! we ball. future chapters will b linked here <3 reblg if u want to be tagged idk that's it. modern au btw. ellie might be a little ooc? for the sake of the au

TRIGGERS: murder but it happens offscreen + blackmail under the threat of violence n manipulation. there's also smoking wed

You'd be the first to admit your interests tended to ebb on morbid.

Maybe, you muse, it had to do with the source of your upbringing: Jackson. It was a stereotypical small town, where, cliché as it was, everybody knew everybody. The town's history was clean as a goddamn whistle. While places like Seattle— Abby's hometown— were a hotspot for crime due to the sheer amount of people making it slightly harder to get caught unless you were a goddamn idiot, with the close proximity of everyone within Jackson from Dina to Tommy Miller, any crime you could commit would be shut down by the local police force in a month at most.

At least— that was what you thought.

So, you indulged your macabre curiosity elsewhere: you binge watched slashers despite your parents' vehement protests and you researched the violent happenings that often took place outside your sheltered hometown. Hell, you'd even indulged in one of those stupid fucking murder mystery games with some of the allowance you'd managed to spare that wasn't spent on various branded paraphernalia... and the other kind, but nobody needed to know that.

You weren't exactly surprised at how others seemed to be creeped out by you: Friday the 13th wasn't exactly a commonplace interest. Even so, you'd managed to make a few close friends whom you considered enough to get you by.

You jolt as your locker slams shut beside your head, and Abby's cackling is all too familiar.

"Fuckin' dick," you groan, feigning your exasperation— you'd finished putting your stuff away, anyway. "What happened to 'hello'? 'How was your day, Y/N?'"

"Your day's always the same," Abby provides helpfully, and you roll your eyes. "You wake up, come to school, indulge the same 3 people—" Her, Ellie, and Dina— "in the same rotation of conversations until they leave, go home, get violently high, watch whatever weird slasher your fancying that night, and then go to bed."

You blink owlishly. "Got my schedule memorized down pat there, Abs. You been stalking me?" You smirk, playfully, but your brow arches when she falls suspiciously silent. "Uh... alright."

"Anyway, you're having a change of plans," Abby finally says, and your eyes widen as you pipe up to speak. "You'll still get violently high and watch a slasher, don't worry. You'll just be gracing me and Ellie with your company while you do." She finishes, and you fall silent.

'Alright," you mutter. "Do I get to pick the slasher, or are you gonna pick some cornball shit like Chopping Mall?" You huff. Abby begins to answer, but your phone suddenly chimes with a notification from your news app.

Local man found dead from apparent stabbing.

Your mouth falls open slightly as Abby reads the headline over your shoulder. You fail to notice her nervous expression.

"Huh," you mutter, slinging your backpack over your shoulder. "Something interesting finally happened in this town. Neat."

-

The choice in film, much to your chagrin, was Chopping Mall. Fortunately, you were too far gone to care.

Your head lolled of the side of the bed, your back strewn across Ellie's legs as you barely manage to register the words spewing from her mouth as you take another hit from the blunt she'd rolled.

"I just don't get how you like these," she complains. "I mean, it's the same damn formula every time. Does it not get boring?"

"That's the pointtttt," you groan. "The more formulaic they are, the better. Sure, some newer takes can be good: but sticking to the classics is a good play. Better safe than sorry." You wave off her concerns.

"Well, look at this little flim critic," Ellie teases as she stares at Abby, who's staring blankly at the ceiling. You'd never fail to find her lower tolerance hilarious.

"I mean," you and Ellie wait patiently through Abby's long pause. "They're right. Formulaic can be good. Patterns are more predictable— easier to keep up." She says, and you notice her and Ellie share a look.

"But they can also suck," she hisses. "Because if you're predictable, it makes it easier to connect. Like, in these movies how they're always killing off dumb, blonde bimbos— you can tell they're all copying eachother." She complains. You squint at the both of them, but don't comment on the subject.

"There's no right answer," you shrug. "I just find the middle ground. Sure, it's predictable, and boring. But it's also the safe call to make. People criticize these movies, but they make fuckin' millions. The original ones get better reviews, but they end up falling flat in the box office."

You don't realize Ellie and Abby's argument isn't referring to movies in the slightest.

"You sound way too fuckin' smart for the both of us," Ellie says, and you snort.

"It's because I am," your eyes flash toward Ellie's clock. "Shit. I gotta go. Parents will kill me if I'm not home soon." You shoot upward, trying to adjust to your surroundings. You cannot come home looking high out of your fucking mind. "See you guys later."

You watch as the two of them give you a halfhearted wave, and once you shut the bedroom door, you chalk up the strange shuffling to... something you don't want to know, honestly.

You don't realize it's much worse than you thought.

-

You surmise the punishment for being late is slightly lesser than the punishment for coming home inebriated, so you take the risk to sober up in a nearby alley between a convenience store and a small restaurant.

The alley is lit up by string lights and decorated with a few benches— perfectly habitable, and it's not what scares you— what does set you on edge is the unchecked darkness of the forest beyond the alley.

You elect to ignore the unease in your stomach, instead taking a hearty swig of the water you'd bought from the convenience store before coming outside. The tension in your shoulders almost releases, then—

You hear a scream.

A bloodcurdling scream.

Every nerve in your body tells you to run the opposite direction of the plea for help, every goddamn slasher you've watched over the years telling you playing the hero always gets you killed, but it's not heroics that lead you toward the source of the noise.

It's that same morbid curiosity that gets you watching slashers in the first place.

The noises grow louder as you draw nearer, and your eyes widen as you stifle a gasp when you see the bloodied body of Nora lying at the feet of two masked killers. You sigh in relief when you realize the treeline obscures you from view, but the noise comes out far too loud.

It hits you just how fucked you are.

You've made a few essential mistakes in the laws of survival so far, but you're not stupid enough not to run: you make a mad dash, but in a sick (and ironic) twist of fate, you trip over your abandoned water bottle and wince as the solid trunk of a tree collides against with your head with a loud thunk.

Through the blurry haze that is your vision, you see the two killers standing right in front of you. You prepare for the worst, when—

"Y/N?"

Oh, shit.

"El?" You hear the panicked rambling of another woman. "Abs? What the FUCK!?"

You almost kick out when Abby covers your mouth with a gloved hand, but know better than to get violent with the woman twice your size with a fucking hunting knife to boot.

"Ellie, El, this is bad." Abby's voice is shaking. "What the Hell do we do, man?"

The forest falls painfully silent.

"Well," Ellie finally begins. "The best course of action? Kill the witness." You whimper, and mentally hit yourself for showing any vulnerability. "But," she continues. "On the other hand, I kind of like this one."

You will Abby to take her hand off your mouth with a pleading look.

"So," you hiss. "What's your plan, here? I don't have all night. Either get this over with and slit my throat or hurry the fuck up."

Ellie grins. "I've always liked that you were a little feisty, Y/N."

"I said," you grit your teeth. "Hurry up."

"Here's the deal, darling," Ellie tilts your chin up with the hilt of the knife. You look away. "You help us out. And we don't kill you." She wrenches your head forward, just enough to look her in the eyes. "You say no, or you rat us out," she mutters, lowly. "And we slit your throat. Deal?"

It hits you there's not a lot of options on the table. You glance over at Abby, clearly the more emotionally charged of the two, and wonder if you can bargain with her. But, you decide, she's probably just as crazy as Ellie or too scared to say no if her going along with this in the first place was any indication.

And, a darker part of you whispers, you wonder how it must feel, if they're willing to do such heinous things.

Finally, you assent with a shaky nod.

"Alright," you wrench your gaze away again.

"I'll help you."

WC: 1.5K

[crazykuroneko]

Joining the Rewind the Tape event

This will be my first time rewatching IWTV S1 since it's first broadcast (excluding the indirect watch I get from watching YouTube reactions). I'm bad at creating content, but I have been meaning to rewatch it the same way I watch movies; with my note app ready for me to write down things I notice. And like when watching movies, I don't really care about source material nor the existing theories; I just try to deduce from what I see. So, I feel this is a good way to refresh my mind before going into S2 after all the fanons and theories going around. I use my note to decide how I score a film, so I write down technical stuff as well.

If anyone wants to discuss, feel free to reply ✌️

Here is my note for S01E1:

• What a witty opening. Tricking audience that it's something it's not (an ad, which is closer to our reality). Setting the tone of what's to come.

• "Your sources are your Sherpas (a guide?). Your editor is your priest. Honesty is not a tactic."

• "Can he make his fantasy a reality?" Touche!

• 9/4/73. 4 September 1973

• Daniel looks so pissed listening to the old tape lol.

• That transition of Louis' face over the city. That's so Great Gatsby of him. And the long close shot makes Louis so still and inhuman, what a contrast with the ones from the church scene.

• "Have I hit the nerve?" Drink every time the script being so funny!

• Louis: "Yet you come anyway". Daniel: "That's my voice but I don't remember it" 

• "Truth and reconciliation" Reconciliation: the process of making two opposite beliefs, ideas, or situations agree.

• June 14, 2022.

• "The favored son. And capital to oversee as consequence"

• "You're a pimp". "The product is desire" The difference in their language in this dialogue is so interesting.

• Bricks hitting Fenwick after he tried to rape her. That's our girl 😌✊

• The score came up on the right time.

• Lestat witnessing and hearing the contradiction in Louis over loving his brother versus going hard on him in order to survive and falling in love immediately 😌✊✊✊✊

• "Let's not fuss on the particulars" Particulars in question are women being exploited and sometimes raped, but okay. 

• Florence and Grace don't like to hear the hard facts, I see. 

• "A lie I told myself about myself"

• No that white man Louis staring at is so ugly. Louis, please!

• Oh, Les definitely hears Tom inviting Louis for a game on Friday.

• "And there's a food" *gestures to Lily*. God, i love this script.

• Oh, Lestat did "mezmerized" Louis here (either accidentally or not idk), like he did with Paul later at the dinner. Hence, Louis says "not with my family".

• "Emasculation AND admiration in equal measure. I wanted to murder the man, and I wanted TO BE the man." Basically a summary of what attracts Louis to Lestat. 

• Lestat killing the white man with lamp scene is interesting if you consider what we watch as Louis' POV because logically Louis didn't see it as it happened in 1910. But the existence of this scene signals that 2022 Louis (or Louis after the fact) now knows that Lestat did prowling the city during the night killing people. Iirc there will be more scenes like this.

• Help Sam and Jacob's chemistry right when their eyes meet each other 😭😭😭😭♥️

• Not @ Lestat dumbing himself down in front of the white men and Louis smiled adorably over it even though he probably knew that's just an act. We lost him so fast

• The practical effects are so cool.

• Lestat was like don't you know your value etc etc, yet he still did not back up Louis to Fenwick. The red flag is red flagging.

• "He's not revealed his vampire nature yet." But Louis definitely knows something is up with him (see: two instances of "mezmerize" and the time stop)

• That shot of Leslou in the mirror at the tailor is so cute 🥺

• "Mother loves European" Louis is so her son 😂

• "He ain't takin' it you getting married" Paul was indeed getting worse 😭

• Lestat being so taken aback with how blunt Paul is then taken aback over Louis' lying to his family he's not enjoying opera is so funny. 

• Sam's eyebrows definitely have a life of their own lol

• Louis gives Lestat's "violent and weird peculiarity" a pass unless it's toward his loved ones. Reminds me of that Jacob's interview on the domestic abuse in the show.

• The talk Leslou have while walking back to Lestat's house is really the summary of Louis' different "hats". "They sit in judgement. Paul is the only one to say it to my face"

• Louis' action vs words when Lestat asked him for a "nightcap" is 🤌

• I thought Lestat's hand is in Lily's skirt when she seemingly orgasm, but it isn't. His hand also doesn't explore too much on her at Fairplay Saloon either compared to what Louis' narration implies. Is it the show being careful how they touch women or is it some kind of "censor"? I need to pay attention to it later.

• The choreo between Leslou to make it look like they're fighting for control/dominance. This is A grade yaoi 🤌🤌🤌🤌

• Louis checking on Daniel whether he has ~ embraced his sexuality~ then describing his homosexual intimate moment with drugs to a former addict is a very deliberate choice. Daniel isn't the only one digging in this interview.

• Drinking blood from another in an intimate setting feels extremely intimate

• Gosh Paul doesn't even want Levi to touch him

• The tap dance scene 😭 Paul 😭

• Paul spiralling down pre-wedding, seemingly angry during the wedding, eating a lot, remembering their best time, checking on Louis and Grace, saying I love you. Yeah, he definitely did it himself 🥲

• I know the night sky is a green screen, but the lights hit Louis' face so beautifully. I don't know how they did it 

• Florence 😡😡😡😡

• "Miss Lily proved herself a poor subtitute" Lestat 😡😡😡😡😡

• Lestat is completely out of touch with humanity, he only cares about himself.

• Finnick must think it's very weird that he has to keep Lestat away from Louis that he gets his arm broken but the next time they meet, Leslou are close again 😅

• Daniel Hart slaying with the score 🤌🤌🤌🤌

• Louis connects the dots when he hears Lily got the "fever" 😞

• Jacob's acting at the confession. The score filling the space over his voice. The mixing tuned up perfectly when Lestat snatching the priest. 🤌

• Lestat knocked down two lamps, one is so far away from the confession, to give proper lighting is so funny lol. (I know it's shooting necessity but still 😂)

• Sam definitely has a subwoofer in his throat wtf (I'm listening with earphones)

• You can see Sam hasn't used to talk with his fangs on here.

• The camera trick after Lestat punched the priest is so clever.

• I wonder what Lestat is hearing during his proposal scene, because he definitely gets Louis the moment he says he loves him. The change in Louis' face 🥲

• Sam's eye acting during the part laid over with Louis' narration. That part will always be my Roman Empire 

• "For the first time in my life, I was seen". Not "felt seen". He's still sure that that's a fact. 

• Louis already gives little nods the moment Lestat finished "for eternity" 🥲🥲🥲🥲

• Jacob's whole monologue during the turn 🤌🤌🤌

• "He sat there, radiant" *while Lestat's is laying down, catching his breath* Louis' narration is more "flowery" than the recollection?

Summary: I'm extremely impressed with how much we know about Louis' personality (especially the contradiction in himsef) just from the script of this episode. Alan Taylor trusts Jacob and Sam's ability a lot to do a lot of close-ups and just let their faces tell the story. Louis' costumes, scores, and audio mixing are perfection.

[chaotic-on-main]

Skyyyyy!! I am so excited for this event! I ran to your ask box.

I’m craving Pralines and Cream for me today. Ima pick Kitchen Sink. I want something about me getting jealous and him reassuring me that we are secure with one another, maybe the first time he says I love you?? Possibly. But def pre-established relationship. Maybe 4th year in school(That makes us 18?19?) I don’t remember. Let me be that young again 😂😂😂 anyway love you so much my little bean (i legit call all my close friends that ignore me) ❤️❤️❤️. Or college AU if you don’t want to do canon!

Off to request one with Levi now 😂. But you don’t have to do both!

Order up!! One pralines and cream with all the works for Bee!!

Sky's Summer and 250 Follower Event!

☾ Pairings ➼ Megumi Fushiguro x gn!Reader

☾ Content/Warnings ➼ fluff, jealous reader, canonverse, love confession

☾ Author's Note ➼ Hi Bee!! This one was a little fun. I always picture Nobara and Yuji as the goofiest little shits so it's nice to have a character that balances the team out by being like Megumi lol. I hope this okay! I'm not very familiar with his character like the others so this has been great practice. Also I realized this is more dialogue heavy than I'm used to, so that was interesting to work on! Thank you for the request!! Ilysm!! (also I love being called a bean, never stop) 💕

☾ Word Count ➼ ~1.5k

Ever since you had met those idiots you called friends so long ago, there never seemed to be any peace for you. Outwardly complaining about them was your favorite pastime, though anyone could tell that you really did love them despite the cutting tone. Nobara and Yuji were two sides of the same coin and you couldn’t have asked for a better set of dummies. Fortunately for you, you had Megumi to help balance out their stupidity. You and him actually bonded early on from the back and forth banter about how annoying they were, yet it was again obvious how much you both adored them.

All of this to say that whenever you hear your name being yelled from across the street, you couldn’t help but groan at the incoming trouble headed your way.

You shut the book you had been enjoying at the outdoor café where you like to get your favorite daily cup of tea. It was small and never overly-crowded, which was one of the best things about it. When you look over to the source of yelling, you’re not surprised to see it is indeed Nobara and Yuji barreling their way towards you.

“What do you idiots want? It’s too early for this nonsense.” You gripe back, scowling over to them.

“Fushiguro is getting hit on!” They yell at the same, both looking over to each other and frowning.

“Idiot, I said I would tell her.” Your orange-haired friend punches Yuji in the arm.

“Ow! I forgot!” He swats at her.

“What do you mean, ‘Fushiguro is getting hit on’?” You raise an eyebrow.

“I mean just what I said.” Nobara says quickly.

“And he’s really into it. I saw him waving his arms around and all that.” Yuji starts flapping his arms in a way to recreate what he saw. He accidentally slaps Nobara in the face in the process. Before she can retaliate, you raise your arms to get their attention.

“Are you sure this was Megumi Fushiguro? Broody, black spikey hair?” You chuckle nervously. “Pffft okay, sure… Regardless, he can take care of himself.” You pick at an imaginary hair on your shirt.

“Well, we know how you feel about him, don’t you wan-“ Your eyes shoot up into Nobara’s nonchalant gaze.

“You don’t know anything.” You scowl again, folding your arms across your chest.

“Keep telling yourself that, but we’re going back to watch this train wreck. You can join if you want!” And then they’re already off. In a huff, you gather your things and follow them. You really hope they’re just blind and got the wrong person. It wasn’t Megumi. It couldn’t be.

.

When they finally stop running, you are completely out of breath. You’re not that out of shape considering the regiment your school puts you through, but you didn’t realize they would be taking you so far away. How they ran to you in the first place is mind boggling. What’s even worse is that as you make it to the concrete stairs leading down to a landing, you definitely spot your friend Megumi - still chatting away with another girl.

The sinking feeling in your chest comes instantly. How stupid of you to not have said how you felt about him sooner. Now here are the consequences of your actions. He points at something, which makes the stranger laugh loud enough that it trickles up the staircase and into your ears. Your legs are flying down the stairs before you even realize what’s happening.

 “There you are, Megumi!” You yell, pulling your lips back into a fake smile.

He jumps at the sudden loudness, whipping around at the sound of your voice. The girl he’s talking to smiles at you and waves.

“What’s going on here?” You ask, your voice coming out a little higher than planned.

“This is-“ You cut Megumi off by grabbing his arm and tugging on it.

“Oh that’s great, it’s nice to meet you. Actually, if you don’t mind I’d love to steal him away from you if that’s okay?” And with that you start walking, pulling him away.

“O-okay! Thank you for your help!” You hear her yell from behind. You don’t give her a second glance as you pull him around the corner.

“Hey, what the fuck was that?” Megumi stops abruptly, grabbing your hand and making you stop as well.

“I’m not sure what you mean?” You face him and smile sweetly. Your cheeks hurt from the forced effort.

“Don’t play dumb with me. That wasn’t like you at all.” His eyes cut into yours and you can’t help but look away.

“I just thought you needed help getting out of being hit on.” You shrug your shoulders, still refusing to meet his glare. Your smile fades slowly.

“I wasn’t being hit on, dumbass. She was asking for directions because she’s new around here and then started asking for recommendations.” Megumi’s glare feels red-hot against your face. Or was it the embarrassed flush that comes with being so completely wrong?

“In my defense, Nobara and Yuji-“

“I’m sure they said something dumb. I just can’t believe you would listen. And why does it matter if I’m having a good time or not?”

“Why wouldn’t I?”

“You didn’t answer my question.“ You narrow your eyes down to your sneakers that you found yourself staring at instead of what was right in front of you.

“Just forget it.” You throw your hands up in the air and turn to leave.

Megumi mutters your name, soft. Low. Curious.

“Were you... jealous?”

“Pfft, jealous?? Of what?” You throw a glare over your shoulder as you walk, only to have your steps falter at the look in Megumi’s eyes. What was that?

“I don’t know. You tell me.” He mumbles, taking a few steps closer to you.

“There’s nothing to be jealous about.” You face him again, folding your arms across your chest in defiance.

“You’re right, there’s nothing to be jealous about.” He agrees. He takes another step to you, leaving about 4 feet between you two.

“I love you, so. Why would I want anyone else.” He mumbles under his breath, rubbing the back of his neck with one of his hands as he looks away awkwardly.

 “Yeah. I mean, you do kinda suc- what? What did you say?” Your arms fall to your sides as you attempt to process what he just said.

“Why would I want anyone else?” Megumi repeats, this time louder.

“No, the other part.” Your heart feels like it’s about to beat out of your chest. You will it to calm down as the blood pumping in your ears makes it hard to hear.

“I said I love you.” He looks up at you, dark blue eyes boring into yours. Sincerity mixed in with apprehension reflects back at you.

“I- Megumi. That’s-“ You stutter. You bite the inside of your cheek nervously.

“You don’t have to say anything. I just thought you should know so I don’t freak you out like that again.” He starts to turn away, but you close the gap and wrap your fingers around his wrist to stop him.

“Megumi, wait.” He plants his feet but doesn’t turn to face you.

“Since when?” You continue.

“Since what?”

“How long have you loved me?”

There’s a deafening silence as you wait for his response. A couple of cars pass by – the rush of air blowing your hair every which way. Slowly, Megumi rounds on you. He eyes you with anxiety, a signature downturn of his lips ever present. His wrist is still enclosed in your grasp.

“Since the end of our first year.” He mumbles.

“That long?” Your eyes are wide in shock as you process how long that had really been. That would make it a little less than 3 years that he’s liked you. No, not liked. Loved. And currently still.

“Why haven’t you said anything?” It’s your turn to frown back, lips pursed in a small pout.

“There was never a good time. It’s hard when we’re always on the verge of being murdered.” He says dryly with an eye roll.

“That’s a fair point, I suppose.” You laugh at that. You all rarely get a break from world ending obstacles. You both stare at each other, the tiny bit of tension from earlier now quashed.  

“Hey, ‘Gumi.” You whisper, closing the small space between you and him and continuing, “I love you too.” You lean in and kiss him delicately on the cheek, noting the softness of his skin against your lips. When you pull away, a shit-eating grin crawls up your face. He’s watching you stunned, a bright pink dusting his cheeks. After a few seconds, the apprehension that clouded his aura was now gone as a small smile replaced his shock.  

“So… if you love me so much, what are you buying me for lunch?” You ask. And then that frown is back like it never left.

“You’re so stupid sometimes. Let’s go find the idiots and-“

“Let them get their own food. I want you all to myself this time.” You release your grip from his wrist and place your hand into his, closing your fingers and squeezing. Before he can say anything, you whisk him away and towards your favorite restaurant.

I don't really have a taglist for anything outside of AoT so if anyone wants to be put on a list for any future JJK writing, let me know in the comments??

[thefearedashantis]

Tender Headed

Pairing: James Potter x blackfem! reader

Summary: James helps reader retwist her locs

Word count: 1,065 ish

Warning: mention of reader being hit across the hands by a parent.

“It’s open!”

James enters your apartment with a prominent frown etched into his face. Arms loaded with takeout bags and glasses fogged from the cold outside. “I really hate when you leave your door unlocked like that mouse” he says, kicking said door shut with his foot and slipping the lock into place.

He moves to the kitchen counter to drop the bags before doubling back to slide off his shoes.

You glance at him with a guilty smile from your place on the floor in front of the TV. This isn't the first time he’s voiced his disdain for your lack of caution and it most likely will not be the last.

“You said you were five minutes away.”

“Yeah” he throws his arms up in exasperation while wrestling out of his pluffy coat, “but still, just wait until I get here.”

The conversation is dropped as quickly as it started as James’ attention diverts to the food now that he’s freed himself. He’d stopped by your favorite wing spot before coming over to spend some time with you. You hadn't been dating for very long, but due to both of your hectic schedules the majority of your dates took place within the confines of either of your apartments. Not that you minded.

“Ok they didn’t have that lemonade you like so I got the ginger flavor instead. And they had these new hot wings I thought we could try!” His voice drips with excitement as he shifts through the bags “Half price if you ordered a dessert with them so we have cinnamon rolls for later”

He shuffles over to the living area with the food. Arranging it neatly on the side table before whirling on you with a grand smile “and lunch is served!” His eyes twinkle with pride.

You open your mouth to thank him but the conversation has once again moved on before you get the chance.

“Oh, what’re you doing with your hair?” He’s suddenly seated beside you. Thigh pressed warmly against your own.

Curious hands reach for some of the materials you have sprawled around. Combs and a small basket overflowing with duckbill clips. A portable standing mirror. Hair gels and a spray bottle filled with fresh rosemary water. He shakes it gingerly, bringing it to his nose for a quick sniff. He hums in satisfaction having finally found the source of your usual herbal scent.

“Retwisting” you say, feeling a swell of bashfulness settle in your chest. James has never seen you do your hair before. In fact, you'd never even allowed yourself to be so loose in front of any of your exes. They were quick to complain if you weren’t dolled up every second of every day, no care given for the processes that went into it.

He takes this answer without further question. Finished with his perusal of your products. “Well take a break and eat before it gets cold.”

He tears into his own meal then with much enthusiasm. The two of you fall into comfortable silence. Lulled by the sound of James chewing and the movie you'd only been half watching. Your arms and neck have started to ache a little since you started, but you don’t want to eat before you’ve finished. Only half a head remains.

“How do you do this anyway?” James asks, startling you out of your thoughts.

You contemplate waving him off, but instead tell him to scooch over a tad when he peers at you with genuine interest. “It’s easy, look here.”

You finish up the one you’d been working on and grab for another. Using the tail of the comb and an intense gaze in the mirror you refine the part “Clean up the part, comb the new growth, apply some product” you spin the comb in your hand as far as it can go before plucking it out and using your palm to continue rolling down.

“And just twist in the direction you got them installed. Then pop on a clip” you conclude, clipping it close to the root into a row with two others.

“Wanna try it?” You hold out the comb to James who takes it before you’ve even finished asking.

“Um, yeah ok.” He wipes his fingers off on a napkin and with more care than a boy of his size would be thought capable, takes your hair in his hands. He’s gentle and precise in following your example. So focused on his task you can only smile at the wrinkle between his brow visible through the mirror “Like this?”

You wince as he removes the comb and palm rolls his work “A little too tight Jamie.”

He lets up immediately “Sorry mouse “He completes the twist with a slightly lighter hand. “Does it usually hurt?”

“Well, I was pretty tender headed before I got them, even more so now. Sometimes I have to take some painkillers but it's usually not too bad.”

You could still vividly remember the day you started doing your own hair. You’d only just turned nine, but the teasing you’d endured at school while learning what worked was much preferred to the strikes you’d receive across the knuckles from your mother. When you'd cry for hours on wash and style day. She despised your endless whining and groaning for her to be gentler. Said you were giving her a headache. All the while it felt as if she was ripping your hair out strand by strand.

James clips his piece away. He runs his hand affectionately down your arm “Can I try another one?”

“You’re a natural” you praise him, checking over what he’s done.

James beams at this “Let me do a few while you eat.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah mouse, just relax.” He scoots in behind you to rest his back against the couch. Your supplies are dragged closer to him and your food is handed over. “If I fuck it up you can shave my head in retribution” he jokes, but you cannot find the humor in it.

“I could never do such a thing to your curls! I just got you into a good routine!”

He kisses the scowl off your lips while going for the remote. “What do you want to watch?”

“I saw they have a new season of Love is Blind out.”

James helps you retwist your hair from now on.

[literallyjusttoa]

Some interesting differences between Greek and Roman myths (and other things) that I think would've been really cool to explore in HoO and ToA

Disclaimer: I am no scholar, and while I have tried my hardest to check my resources for accuracy, any sort of second-hand account of mythology has a chance of holding misinformation. I sadly do not have access to many primary sources, so this might not all be 100% accurate!! If you see something and you know it's wrong, pls let me know so I can fix it!

Anyways, onto the list! This is REALLY long, but the organization is gonna go like this.

Fact about the difference between Greek and Roman myths or worship.

Reason why I think it would be interesting to explore in the riordanverse.

and so on and so forth. This is really just for me to document ideas I've had, but hopefully y'all get something out of it too, read at your own risk, I suppose.

The Romans believed that after the Titanomachia, Saturn (The roman name for Kronos) fled to Italy and took refuge with it's king. Saturn eventually shared the throne with this king, and their kingdom was known to be joyous and peaceful. Romans actually worshiped Saturn bc of this, and he had a temple at the foot of Capitoline Hill.

Imagine if Percy arrived at Camp Jupiter, and one of the first things he sees is a temple to the titan he just spent 5 years trying to defeat. Like, I know he has no memories at this point, but I'm sure it would make him at least a bit uneasy. I think this would do a lot to sell the greek/roman schism in HoO, bc that whole plot point never really hit with me. We keep being told the Greeks and Romans hate each other almost instinctively, but other than Octavian, we aren't really shown it. Also it always seems like the Romans hate the Greeks and the Greeks are just kind of offended that the Romans hate them. Having actual tangible reasons for our main Greek character to feel uncomfortable around New Rome would a lot to make this actually feel like an equal issue.

2. In Greek mythology, Zeus was thought to be powerful, but not a supreme force. He was still beholden to the strings of fate. On the other hand, Jupiter was seen as the lord of life and death, having complete power and control over the cycle of life. He was more powerful than fate, and never came down from Olympus, as Zeus was known to do often.

Again, a HUGE discrepancy that I wish the books explored. This just kind of goes with the underdevelopment of Jason in HoO, but how cool would it be if Jason had this understanding of Jupiter. Like, yeah, in canon Jason points out that Jupiter is stern and distant, but it never gets to all-powerful controller of life levels. Having Jason see his father's distance as right and just would make him an incredible contrast to Percy, who just spent the last 5 books trying to get gods to be more open with their kids. It would add so much to Jason's arc about being torn between Camp Jupiter and Camp Half-Blood. As a Roman and Praetor, Jason understands why his father never speaks with him, but as a kid, he wishes he could know the humanity of the Greek side of his father. (ofc in pjo Zeus sucks either way but Jason doesn't know that)

3.Juno was actually seen as much nicer and more matronly than Hera, and was said to watch over every woman from her birth until her death.

I just think this would do wonders for Hera's characterization in the riordanverse. Imagine if we got to see her actually help one of the girls on the Argo II as Juno, especially since she basically put EVERY SINGLE MALE CHARACTER on the Argo II personally, yet had nothing to do with he female characters??? Seriously, Hera was behind Leo, Frank, Jason, and Percy being a part of this quest, but as far as I can remember, she had nothing to do with Annabeth, Piper, or Hazel being there. What is up with that? It would've been so cool to see Juno watch over Hazel, or help Annabeth (Could lead to some awesome character development for both Hera and Annabeth), or even just give some advice to Piper. Seriously we were robbed.

4. This isn't really a difference, but there is actually a period in Rome where Apollo does not seem to have been worshiped at all, or at least not in any major capacity. One temple is noted to have been built for Apollo in 430 B.C.E., but we don't really see him again in any sort of public way until Augustus takes power hundreds of years later. Seeing as Apollo was one of, if not the most popular Greek deity, this is a rather large change. Of course, once Augustus brings him back to the limelight, worship of Apollo becomes hugely popular, with many emperors claiming his moniker to show their own divinity.

This could actually fill a big plot hole in the riordanverse. It makes no sense that Apollo has 6-7 Greek children as of the end of ToA, yet he has no roman kids at all? However, in this light we see Apollo as a god who never really connected with Rome, and was a bit of a late runner when it comes to Roman worship. If you look at it from a character standpoint, instead of a strictly historical or mythological view, it almost seems like Apollo was holding onto Greece. The Romans started taking Greek colonies in the 200's B.C.E, and have fully taken the area by 146 B.C.E.. In this time, and even before it, almost every Greek deity was co-opted into Roman worship. Apollo, however, stayed steadfastly Greek, until Augustus started to pray to him for victory in battle. (Fun fact: Augustus actually credited Apollo with his victory over Marc Anthony and Cleopatra in Actium) This whole thing makes it look like Apollo just didn't want to be Roman, or at least he didn't want to let go of Greece like the other gods were. And it seems like he didn't let go of Greece at all in the end, as there are very few notable differences between his Greek and Roman depictions. From this, I take two things. One, Apollo was probably never Roman, at least not in the way HoO depicts a god being Roman. This creates some interesting implications for how Apollo lived during Roman times, but that's a whole other thing. Two, because of this, Apollo might not be able to have a Roman demigod child. After all, the demigods at Camp Jupiter are classed as such for being born to specifically roman counterparts of gods. If Apollo has no such counterpart, he can't have the kids. Of course, this begs the question of Octavian, but I'll expand on that later.

5. When you look into it, the Roman god Diana is actually much closer to many characteristics of Hecate than she is the Greek portrayal of Artemis (though this is mainly because Artemis and Hecate were mixed together often, even in Greek times.) It is said that Diana has three forms: In the heavens she was Luna, the moon; on earth she was Diana, the goddess of the hunt; and in the underworld, she was Proserpine, a malevolent master of witchcraft.

Ok, ok I know this actually makes no sense in the context of HoO, but wouldn't it be so cool if Hazel worked with Diana instead of Hecate. I just think it would really expand the arc!! Seeing a different side of Artemis, one of the godesses we've probably saw the most of in the original series, would be so neat. Also, Diana as Proserpine having connections to both witchcraft and the underworld makes her a perfect fit. IDK IDK I just think it would be really cool. PLUS it would give Hazel and Frank a fun little parallel bc Frank would be inspired by Apollo while Hazel was trained by DIana. Vague sun and moon parallels my beloved.

6. The job of an Augur is actually much closer to the Greek's soothsayers than it is their oracles. While oracles are said to interpret the god's will, soothsayers and augurs see the future simply through simple acts of nature. The way in which augurs tell the future actually has a lot less to do with the gods than one might assume.

I just wish this fact was mentioned in HoO bc honestly it clears up so much for me. Also when it comes to Octavian, I think it makes more sense for him to be blessed by Apollo instead of descended from him (I know he says he's both in the book but shhh wait let me keep going for a sec) Soothsayers and Augurs were priests, directly picked by the gods to divine the future on their own. While oracles were basically the gods mouthpieces, Augurs would be allowed to divine their own interpretation of the future from what they saw in nature, all condoned by whatever god blessed them (probably Apollo). In this way, the whole "Apollo is turned mortal bc he supported Octavian" thing makes a lot more sense. In canon, we only get told through a throwaway line that Apollo was "totally swayed by Octavian's promises of power guys, trust me." It always just seemed so out of left field to me. If I were to take it in a new direction, I would lean much more into the fact that Octavian was an appointed priest of Apollo, who abused his supposed ability for prophecy to cause war. Apollo is now directly stated to be Octavian's willful benefactor, so of course he'd take the fall this. It would show Apollo's callousness. He doesn't care for Camp Jupiter as much he does Camp half-blood (see point 4) so he let the position of Augur become corrupt with little complaint. Also, if Octavian isn't Apollo's descendant, my whole "Apollo can't have a roman kid" theory is FOOLPROOF HAHAHAHAAHAHAHA

7. While both cultures had large religious festivals, Rome's were much more centralized and documented. This is mainly due to Rome being ruled by a single republic or emperor, as opposed to Greece's city-states.

This isn't changing anything in canon as much as wishing there was more of it. Man, I wish we could've seen more of the Roman festivals. We're always just told they happen, but I wanna know the specifics! These are huge religious events! Are the New Romans actually fully worshiping the gods these festivals celebrate? How do the Roman characters we have feel about the festivals? Does Jason miss them while on the Argo II? Do Hazel, Frank, and Jason try to put on a small celebration for the festivals that pass while they're sailing to Rome? Let these things be important dangit.

8. When the Greeks sculpted, they focused on the ideal form, with emphasis put on the athletic male figure. Because of this, the face of the figure was not specific to any individual, as it was not the focus. In contrast, the Romans put a heavy emphasis on the face. In Rome, you wanted your lineage to be known, so you had your face sculpted with intense detail. That way, sculptures of your face could be compared with sculptures of your forefathers, or your children.

Again, I wish we were shown more of a difference between Greeks and Romans than "Romans are strict and organized, Greeks like to have fun" They're two entirely different cultures!!! Imagine if we showed the Roman emphasis on lineage in someone other than Octavian. Have Jason be genuinely proud of the affluence being a son of Jupiter gives him, let that be a flaw of his, a point of contention on the Argo II. Show how family pride can be important in arcs like Frank's, where he learns how to accept the fact that he is Mars' son, and grow into that role. Put the emphasis of these arcs on the fact that they're struggling with the ROMAN idea of family lineage. Let being from New Rome be an real identity. I feel like the synopsis of this whole thing is that I wish the Romans had whole beliefs that were wildly different from the Greeks. They could value different things, interact with the gods in distinctly different ways. We always see the conflict of swords between the Greeks and Romans, but never the conflict of beliefs, and I think that kind of sucks. Also it makes NO SENSE THAT THE ROMANS HATE THE GREEKS ANYWAY! Ancient Romans fucking loved Ancient Greeks! They saw the Greeks as their ancestors, adapting all of their religion and art out of a genuine appreciation for the culture. If anyone should hate anyone, it should be the Greeks, bc the Greeks were the ones who GOT CONQUERED. But in HoO, all of the Greeks just seem mildly disgruntled by the idea of Romans. idk it doesn't make much sense to me.

If you got to the end, I hope you got something out of my rambles. I honestly still feel like I have more to say about this stuff, so if anyone has any questions or wants me to expand on anything lmk! If not tho, thank you for reading!

[that-ari-blogger]

Writing Your Own Story, Together

Sense and Insensitivity is the single most terrifying episode in the Owl House. More than Hollow Mind, more than King's Tide, this episode is nightmare fuel. It's got all of the greatest hits, giant spiders, tight spaces, publishers. This episode should have been the Halloween episode.

But that is just me. If you don't get scared of these things, what is in this episode for you?

Well, this episode is about teamwork, it helps to nurture the friendship between King and Luz, and it shows that sisterly cooperation is possible between Eda and Lilith.

Let me explain.

SPOILERS AHEAD

The main plot of Sense and Insensitivity is the collaboration on a book by King and Luz. It shows the differing opinions on what they want the story to be about, and it leads to argument.

And I'm going to get on my soap box for a second here, because something needs to be said. Opinions about what is a good story do not contradict each other. If someone ever tells you a story "must" or "can't" include a specific element, they are objectively wrong, because a story can be whatever you like. I have seen a level of argument online about people going after others who like or dislike certain story elements, and I find that ridiculous for one key reason: If you don't like a thing, you don't have to read a book or watch a series with it in. For example, I have hemophobia (fear of blood), but instead of complaining that everybody writes gory books and telling people not to, I find media without blood in it, and I watch or read that. It's a simple solution.

Anyway...

In the Owl House, this comes to a head when the two split paths to write their own stories, and my wording there is important. Because one of the main themes of the entire series is witing your own story. So, you would think that the split would be framed as a good thing, based off this, right?

But no, because this episode makes something clear about forging your own path. It doesn't mean that you have to travel everywhere alone.

That soapbox I mentioned earlier is important to understand, because people having different tastes is the whole point of humanity. We are a diverse species, physically, culturally, but also emotionally. If we all only liked the media I personally enjoy, the world would be stale. We need people with different tastes to make life interesting, but we also need them to guide us.

We need people who are different from us to help us along our journeys. Writing your own stories doesn't mean not taking inspiration. It means doing what you like, the way you like. You can certainly be inspired by others if you want.

But writing your own story doesn't mean you are right in every decision you make. Watch Doctor Who: The Giggle to see why that is a bad idea. Sometimes you need people to keep you back from danger, or you might fall prey to people and things that want to exploit you.

Enter Piniet.

Piniet's character design is funky, and I love it.

First up, there is the reptilian element. Reptiles have a reputation for being cold and emotionless, while this is a subject of debate (Dr. Gordon Burghardt is a co-author of a book titled The Secret Social Lives Of Reptiles which I highly recommend you check out), but the stereotype remains. When you think of a snake, you probably think of a trickster or a liar. When you think of a lizard, you probably think of the "lizard part of the brain", a concept of, once again, dubious accuracy. Psychology today has an article that discusses the concept.

The point I am making is that Piniet's appearance is evoking ideas of heartlessness. Using the stereotype, it is telling you that whatever this character says to King, none of it is genuine.

But there is another little element that I quite like. That third eye. A few reptiles and amphibians have a third eye in real life. It is located on the top of their head and is called a Parietal Eye. Science Direct has a collection of sources on the subject. But Piniet's eye is different from the real world. Because it appears functional, but he keeps it hidden. Piniet has more eyes in play than those he talks to, he can see from more angles, and be aware of things others are not.

There is also the references to a third eye in specific real world cultures and religions. And without getting too far into still living cultures about which I am far from an expert, this is generally related to extra insight or foresight. (Source)

Once again, this links to my reading of Piniet as a character who can read people like books, and if you combine that with the reptile thing, you get someone who is intellectually empathetic, but not emotionally. In other words, Piniet is a manipulator.

I'm not going to recount the plot beat for beat, but needless to say, it takes King and Luz being confined to the nightmare box to get some thinking done and actually work out their differences. And notably, to get out of it, they work together. Luz with the light spell and the plan, and King with that confidence and charisma that he has shown off in previous episodes. Teamwork. Forging their own path together.

It is also notable that the agent is only satisfied by the entrance of Nina Noseworthy, who in this shot litterally eclipses King. The agent is chasing the next big thing, without any care for the art itself. That's just a neat little detail.

Eda and Lilith also have that co-operation on display. And while their similarities have been shown already. When both feel powerful, they both act incredibly pompously. But here, we see a different side of Lilith.

When Eda and Lilith are stressed, they react in completely different ways. Eda laughs it off and gives a veneer of not caring, this isn't new, she's been doing this the entire series. But Lilith on the other hand, she gets scared. Lilith is a very different person to the sneering villain that she is shown to be elsewhere.

This is why I think the redemption later on works so well. They have already proven they can work together. But also, Lilith doesn't have to shift character to switch sides, she just has to drop the mask.

I will also mention that in the scene above, Eda, despite being a fugitive, is open and relaxed in body language, but Lilith is on edge and guarded. Lilith looks like she is hiding something from Eda and afraid her sister will find out. I wonder what that could be.

Final Thoughts

I despise this episode on a personal level. I don't think it's bad at all. This is about average for season one, if not slightly above. My feelings around this episode are entirely centred around that shrinking box and the little cube people, because they are more terrifying than anything Bellos can do.

In all seriousness, this episode has a simple premise, teamwork, that is executed well. The animation is cool, the character designs are awesome. The humour is decent. This is a good Owl House episode.

Next week is Christmas, and I'll be taking a look at wild magic itself, as discussed in Adventures In The Elements, so stick around if that interests you.

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