#anyway sure i'd listen to their movie podcast

[theinstagrahame]

One of the best things about Crowdfunding is, stuff arrives even when you're cutting way back on spending. A *ton* of stuff arrived in the last month and a bit. Got a bunch of really neat projects in, and it's time to get hype about it!

Why these games rule, under the cut

The Revenant Society: Banana Chan is one of those names that immediately catches my attention when she's on a project. Actually, looking at the list again, the team for this game was stacked, it was a real All-Star Cast. But like, even without the powerhouse designers on the case, this just gets all the things I want in a game: Time loops, murder mysteries, trapped on the Underground. A PbtA game where you solve your own murder is, y'know, a pitch that'll attract my attention.

Hellwhalers: I saw this game coming up through design phases in the Plus One Exp Discord, and it sounded incredible. Using tokens and an old ship betting game, you're part of a whaling crew chasing Moby Dick into actual hell. Maybe Ahab wasn't crazy after all, and maybe we won't survive.

Xenolanguage: I might own everything Thorny Games makes now, because they make games about language. Folks who may not know me might not know that I *love* linquistics. Honestly, if I could repeat college, I'd put more of my time into Linguistics. But due to the linear nature of time, I'll settle for playing games about decoding alien language in a first contact situation. Sorta like that movie Contact. Which, I loved.

Mothership and Desert Moons of Karth: I read through the original version of Mothership a couple of years ago, and it's one I wanted to get more into. When I saw that there was a chance to pick up the full 1e boxset on KS, I jumped. I've also seen tons of people talk about Karth as a really awesome sandbox module for the system, so when I had a little cash on DTRPG from selling books, it was an easy pickup.

Inscrutable Cities: Possum Creek Games told me to back this, so I did (this is a joke, but I do love PCG a whole lot). In reality, I saw Inscrutable Cities on Itch a while ago, and the pitch grabbed me. I love reading solo journaling games (I still haven't found a way I like to play them, if I'm completely honest, but they're really neat reads). Walking through an impossible city is something I'd love to do, so, I have the book for it now.

Reap: Spencer Cambell makes bangers, and bangers only. I'm not *not* on a mission to collect all of his work, but Necromancers? Solo tactical board games, built on Rune? Sure. I'm in.

Luna: Spencer Campbell makes bangers, and bangers only. I also picked up another of his books this month. The Nova universe? Moon cultists trying to destroy the sun? Sure, I'm in.

3 Moonlight on Roseville Beach zines: I played Moonlight on Roseville Beach on my now-defunct podcast, and it's a game that I honestly think about a lot. The dice system was complicated, but in a really neat way that gave the players a ton of really interesting decisions with every roll. What part of my action succeeds? What kinds of complications am I opening myself to?

Anyway, R. Rook put together some characters, mysteries, and monsters for the game, and I really wanted to explore more.

Hiria, In the Margins, A Visit to San Sibilia: I mentioned earlier that I like the notion of exploring weird cities, right? Well, here's two games about that, and a cool bookmark RPG for reading. I listened to San Sibilia played in an episode of Friends at the Table, and it really captured my attention. The questions were fascinating, and they let the players flesh out a city we'd only heard of, but not seen prior to that game. It was a cool coda on a really fantastic and weird season, Sangfielle.

Grandmothership: The title alone had me, but Armanda Haller is a creator I keep an eye on, because she makes really rad stuff. This caught my attention because solving mysteries in a weird, Mothership-esque sci-fi setting, as nosy grandmothers, really just, gets me. I want to do that. I want to live that.

Holdfast Station: I've been watching Stonetop develop through its email updates. It's another PbtA game, but with a robust city-building and city development core loop that, is 100% my jam. (Low-key, one of my favorite games is Dragon Quest Builders 2.) This game takes that concept to space, which is 1000% my jam, in fact.

Spectres of Brocken: Aaron Lim is a designer I got into early on in my foray into games, and I do love Mech Anime. I am eager to see his take on Mech Anime, and I am really intrigued by the way this game handles playsets and worldbuilding as part of the game itself. Really can't wait to dive into this.

Lay on Hands: This is another of those games I've heard about, but never actually checked out. I know Alfred Valley better by reputation than by direct experience, but this is one of those games I hear people constantly telling people to check out. So, I'm gonna!

Penumbra City: Maybe 5 years ago, I read a novella by Margaret Killjoy about anarchists living in an abandoned city, and beset by assholes within their community, and supernatural horrors from without. The world kinda stuck with me, so when I saw she was working on an RPG not in the same world), I was curious to see what that would look like. I haven't cracked Penumbra City open yet, but I'm jazzed to do so.

These two fell off the pile for the big photo, so I forgot:

Deathmatch Island: I enjoyed the Hunger Games and Battle Royale movies a pretty moderate amount, but what really caught my attention here was the promise that players could also break the Reality TV Parody. The use of the Paragon system also caught my attention. After hearing one AP of Agon, I really wanted to see how that would translate into this, and it didn't take me too long reading it to go "Oh, okay, this rules."

Our God is Dead: What if you were a paladin or priest of a faith, and you found out your god was dead? What if you also had like, a bunch of people who really needed that god not to be dead, like this weekend? This sounds hilarious, and I am going to insert it into conversation often to see if people want to play it. Apologies to people who know me.

Eagle eyed viewers may have noticed a second Mothership box. What's that about?

It's a storage box for all my Mothership Zines so far... Except the two that are just slightly too big!

And, some fun comics/graphic novels:

Good Boy Paws: A friend of mine in comics put this together, and it looked extremely cute. A sweet tale of a good boi.

Wine Ghost Goes to Hell: Picked this up because the creator had contributed to Bugsnax, which is a game I enjoyed, and the concept seemed fun. Will have to check it out and report back!

[reflections-in-a-critical-eye]

top ten first watches of 2023?

I assume you mean films, right? Anyway, top 10 in no particular order.

Crash was a long time coming, but it took a podcast I used to listen to weekly to finally get to this Cronenberg classic. Bodily modifications? Violent eroticism? Body as a machine? Death & eroticism? It has it all and much more.

For those of you in your 20s and 30s (or even older) who feel alienated in the urban landscape, surrounded by crowds whilst feeling lonely and yearning for any type of human connection, this film is for you.

It's no secret that Brian de Palma wanted to be Hitchcock since he was a baby (I assume, but it sure does look so). You can see it in so many movies of his and Body Double is a perfect example. It even has the misogyny down to a T. But it's also really good and I'm a fan of voyeurism in cinema (from a critical position mostly). This is like Rear Window and Vertigo mashed together, but with 80s hair.

Now this was probably the highlight for me this year. Editor by day, sex worker by night, Kathleen Turner is a force in this film, alongside Anthony Perkins, the perverted priest. But if that is not enough to do the trick, the cinematography and that anal sex scene might do the trick 😉

Who knew Joan Crawford had such a big issue with wire hangers? Not me, but I sure found out in that crazy scene that has one of the most memorable meltdowns in cinema. Every shot of Faye Dunaway screams "I want that Oscar, god damn it!"

Fedora is the late 70s version of Sunset Boulevard and it has the same director. Not as good as that classic, but my god, the clothes! I'd watch it again just for the clothes, particularly that white suit Fedora is wearing in the garden of her villa when she receives that honorary Oscar.

I don't think there's any Paul Schrader film that I didn't like. It wouldn't make sense to call him underrated, but he's better than others from that 1970s gang (cough *de Palma* cough). In Hardcore, a father finds out his daughter went to Los Angeles and started acting in porn. He gets the confirmation when he actually sees her in one film in some shady movie theater. It's a weird and very uncomfortable scene and by comparison, not much, knowing how it will unfold later.

Of course Madonna is always in control of her image and what she allows to be seen or how she comes across. But that doesn't mean there's nothing genuine there, on the contrary. And the camera captures that. The backstage, the everyday conversations, the relationship with the dancers. Real people with real emotions and the more darker parts are allowed to slip in through the cracks. On top of that, it has footage from her tour in 90-91, a reminder of how Madonna is one of the best performers out there, making me wish there'd be a time machine so I can see her live during that time.

For anyone who is a fan of Sex and The City, how about a late 1930s version? Fast pace dialogue, outfits to die for and a cast made almost entirely of women.

The second Cronenberg on the 2023 list. I watched M. Butterfly after seeing Madame Butterfly at the opera. The film is slightly different and it deals with some of my favorite themes in fiction and media lately: gender identities, criticism of colonialism, orientalist fantasies that obscure realities and so much more.

[allthatyouknow]

Hey, been trying to start a game of beam Saber with pals (super inspired by the enthusiasm you guys give it) I've never GM'd before and I'm not sure how to make enemies, do I just re-use pilot/class's and give them random loads and quirks just like pilots do at the start of the game??

Thanks for the help, been enjoying you guys while I'm painting mini's or at work.

Hey there!

Thanks for writing in.

So unlike a game like DnD, enemies don't use any of the same rules that players do. They don't roll any dice, they don't typically have 'moves' the same way players do (though in some cases they could.).

FiTD games (which beamsaber is part of) has much more of a focus on the narrative than things like stats.

It's also much more fluid. In many ways this makes it easier to run than other games which are more stat focused, but it also relies more on the GM having a 'feel' for the story, with less mechanics to rely on.

To make things the simplest possible, we can frame any opposition as Clocks (page 38 of the beamsaber rulebook).

A single, weak enemy (or a group of weak enemies) probably wouldn't have a clock at all. If you imagine a show or a movie, and think of something that is handled quickly, or enemies who die without much opposition - those sorts of obstacles might not have clocks. A single successful roll would be enough to handle them.

(More below)

On the other hand, a more substantial obstacle (an enemy frame, destroying a dam, evacuating civilians) would have a multi-step clock which would be filled over multiple players actions. When you make a clock, you are saying "this is going to take some time, or a coordinated effort to take care of."

There's a lot more to take into account than just clocks though. Tier (the general strength of your player characters, and their opposition), fictional positioning (are the characters well equipped? Are their actions effective against the enemy?) and so on.

Going back to the original question:

At the most basic level - the answer is that enemies don't follow any of the same rules players do. They exist purely in a story sense. Sure they might have weaponry, or special abilities - but they don't have a character sheet - and their weapons and abilities just inform how difficult they'll be in the story, and how they'll be responded to.

Retribution, for instance. Doesn't have any equipment laid out. My notes about him are that:

He's a tier 4 enemy, meaning an isolated tier 1 pilot would probably have limited effect against him from the get go.

He can form weapons out of thin air, so he can use whatever weapon I think is coolest in the moment (lol)

He can teleport, meaning he can jump around the battlefield, or even leave entirely when defeated.

He fucking hates Geist!

(It's also noting that since Retribution is a Rival he has special rules and actions he can take: see page 77)

Brighter minds than I have written a ton on running these systems. And it's worth noting that I definitely bend the rules sometimes during our podcast.

Learning them can take a bit but I'd recommend a couple things:

Read the book thoroughly, and multiple times.

Look up any questions you have about the system, in most cases there will be more information on resources for Blades in the Dark or Forged in the Dark which is the parent system to beamsaber. Seriously, there's a TON of resources out there for this stuff.

If you have system specific questions, the creator of the game @austinramsaygames has a blog here on tumblr! You can submit system-specific questions to him at beamsaberrpg@gmail.com. He's always been very patient and kind with any of the questions I've sent, even when they were sometimes a bit self-evident :).

Okay I've rambled on for awhile, anyways THANK you again for writing in (and leaving comments on our youtube videos :), it's always great to hear from a listener.)

[skayafair]

Podcasts against gender stereotypes (yay!)

I made a post about the way gender essentially doesn't exist in Arcane, but I also wanted to say a few words about two podcasts I've been listening to lately.

In The Sheridan Tapes, I was struck by the way Bill Tyler and his partner, Robert Quincy, became the emotional and caring core of the searchers team. Sam Bailey was also allowed to be vulnerable, his "Heart" episode was soul-piercing, and his power relies mostly on intuition, on feelings. He literally needs an emotional connection for it to work in a certain way.

Kate Sheridan and Maria Sol, on the opposite, felt more like the action members of the team for the most of S2, very determined and tough when needed, holding themselves together at all times.

Things shifted to more neutral in S3 and 4, but S2 had me pleasantly surprised, because the traditional gender roles were sort of reversed but not driven to the extremes (like a lot of movies deal with 'tough women' nowadays). I'm agender so I like when gender stereotypes are treated as non-existent and the authors write people, not "men and women".

It's pretty much the same with Syntax Podcast. There's no clear devision gender roles wise, but I liked how Silas - not Lizzy or Alyx or even the most sociable of the group and the team leader Cassius - became 'the caring one' for the team: despite his stuck up attitude at first (or it just sounded that way to me in the beginning, I'm relistening and it feels way less so now), seemingly being more of an introvert and just 'on his own wavelength', it's Silas' trailer where everyone ends up gathering when they need support, Cass goes to him right away from the very beginning when they want to have some advice or just to discuss anything, any time a team member is having a hard time he makes sure to come up to them and give some reassurance or ask if they need help, and it was him who was making rounds to ensure everyone was ok when they were waiting out a siege. All this, considering that they have a leader, a medic and a security head on the team as well. So it wasn't strictly necessary, but he ended up taking this role all the same, just like he used to care about his mother's wellbeing since childhood after his father died.

Greg, being the "papa bear", also never shows any callousness despite serving in the military for the most of his life. In fact, his supernatural experience story is concentrated on moral support of his fallen comerades families. Moreover, although he tries to act tough like his place in the team demands, he's still allowed to show vulnerability and takes the chance. Same with J - military experience and no toxic masculinity whatsoever (I mean yes there were a few jokes but he was lightheartedly picking on Alyx and paid for this right away XD).

The girls are never damsels in distress and do a lot for the team.

(I don't mention enbies since I'm not aware if we even have any stereotypes going on for us, assigned gender at birth aside? Anyway, there's none of that bullshit either.)

Well, I may mention Greg being "papa bear" and June behaving like a mother hen but these traits aren't toxic, at least in their case. They feel very nice, and actually these two (I'm in denial S3 ending-wise, I have a fix it au in my mind OKAY) act pretty similarly in their care for the team, although they do it in different ways. Plus, I don't mind gender existing at all, only the expectations related to it being perceived as mandatory.

Everyone is written just as people, and they don't shy away from things that traditionally may be attributed to the opposite gender. I love to see - well, technically, hear - this. Please, more.

As a side note: I'd love not to pay attention to such things in general because to me people are just people as is, but in the society I live in every day gender stereotypes are still shoved in everyone's faces. In my country visibly not conforming to them is edging on committing a crime now. Plus gender socialization is still a thing, sadly, so toxic masculinity and femininity still exist and show up often enough, so I have to consider this as well. All this makes pieces of media like Arcane, TST or Syntax all the more enjoyable as they show the world the way I see it and would like it to be in reality.

[nopefer-art-tu]

Another day, another question I'd like to throw out to the fellow Brokeback Mountain tag lurkers. This time, I wanna preface my question with a little background info:

When I first saw Brokeback Mountain I maintained the belief that, when Jack's father tells Ennis about how Jack's plans to bring a rancher up with him didn't "come to pass", it was because the rancher (who we can presume is Randall) backed out, and it was just one more disappointment in a string of failures that was Jack's life before he died. The final knife twist to the gut.

After reading a ton of fics and listening to a ton of podcast reviews abt the movie, though, I've come across a lot of different perspectives about the whole Randall thing. A popular idea amongst the Jack-was-murdered crowd is that Jack and Randall were somehow discovered and that is what led to Jack's death. Interestingly enough, there's actually an entire deleted scene of the film dedicated to this perspective—we don't have any footage of it, but as far as I could tell, the gist was that Jack and Randall were either coming back from or on their way to having one of their own "camping trips", when the camera focuses on a good ol' boy mechanic watching them very closely, foreshadowing the scene of Jack being beaten bloody that happens during Ennis' call with Lureen. This scene was deleted most likely because the filmmakers thought it was leading the audiences too much to a firm conclusion of Jack's death, and they wanted to maintain the tragedy of it's ambiguity from the short story.

Anyways, all this aside, I'm just kind of curious to know what others think went down with the whole Randall/Jack thing. What, exactly, did John Twist mean when he told Ennis that it didn't come to pass—was it actually a sure thing that they were going to move on up there, or was Jack putting his time and effort into another futile effort?

In relation to that, I'm also curious to know what y'all think about how the Ennis/Jack dynamic would have continued in the event that Jack didn't die? Like, if you think Randall and Jack were actually going to make a go of it, do you think that Jack would still sneak off to get his hits of Ennis twice a year while living at his parent's ranch with Randall? If he lived and still didn't get Randall, would Jack have moved on? After their last fight, would Ennis have heard from Jack ever again?

[the-world-i-have-known]

I remember that when I chose to start studying German back in 2018, I thought "wouldn't it be cool to be able to read Brothers Grimm fairy tales in German?" I wasn't even sure if I would reach that level.

Fast forward to last year, 2022, I'm in Germany for the first time and I find a copy of Brüder Grimm Kinderß und Hausmärchen for 1 euro. At the time, although my German was improving, I still had a hard time reading the stories.

Well, today I just started reading a couple of stories from the book and I can actually understand it! I might not know all the words, but it's definitely not that hard.

Man, learning languages is pretty cool. It's amazing that I can understand a language that I didn't grow up speaking well enough that I can read books, listen to music and podcasts, watch tv and movies.

anyways, thought I'd share this progress!

[alivehouse]

(While sending this ask I've accidentally found out what cool wallpapers (literally) you have on your desktop blog theme.)

Well, good day, my dearest horror podcast Virgil,

I, surprisingly to myself, actually finished "I am in Eskew" and enjoyed it quite a bit (which, I guess, could have been deduced by how much I spammed in the tag) even more surprisingly, considering I'm absolutely not a horror person - I substitute horror movies with their wikipedia retellings. Unironically.

Anyway, firstly, thank you! I definitely would have never discovered it without your recommendations!

Secondly, maybe you have something else like that stashed up your sleeve? I definitely need some time to recuperate, but I would like to explore more cool podcasts. (The only two limitations: short-ish - not much longer than this one, the view of a hundred+ episodes scares me; not gorier than this one/no actual jump scares - again, I'm a scardicat.) I remember you talking about "Mabel Podcast" and at the first glance it seems neat, but I'd like to hear your comments on it first.

Thanks in advance. :)

(thank you! its a william morris thing i edited a little lol) glad you liked eskew! its been fun seeing your thoughts on it popping up in the tag, not spammy at all.

i do want to mention that the creator of eskew also has another podcast called The Silt Verses, personally i havent listened to it for weird brain reasons so not sure how well it fits your criteria but ive heard its also very good

mabel podcast is another favorite! the creators of mabel and the creator of i am in eskew were both inspired by shirley jackson's the haunting of hill house to an extent iirc, so even though the stories are very different some elements of them have a similar 'feel' to them imo. i will say that mabel is very different stylistically though (especially the earlier episodes) which in my experience people seem to either love or hate. whereas in eskew you get a pretty continuous narration from david or riyo, in mabel youre mostly listening in on a series of somewhat disjointed voicemail messages. id definitely recommend at least giving the first few episodes a go, dont get discouraged if you dont feel like you dont understand whats happening right away. all you really need to know about the story going in is that youre following Anna, whos a live-in carer for an old woman named Sally. Anna is trying to contact Sallys next of kin (the titular Mabel), but shes strangely out of reach.

ok i know you said youre not a huge horror person but if you ever are feeling a little more daring id suggest trying out The White Vault. theres a small amount of gore (descriptions of finding hearts and teeth) and some uh. wet ripping sounds in it but its really not that bad all things considered, just know that it is straight horror though. its a found footage podcast that follows a group of people whove been hired to check out a remote outpost in northern norway thats gone dead, but a storm leaves them stranded there, and as time goes on it becomes clear that they arent exactly alone. this ones a little longer i think, but tbh ive only listened to the first two seasons, it felt like a natural place for the story to end to me

and then on the complete opposite side of the spooky podcast spectrum, if you want something thats a ghost story but really not horror at all imo, i just finished listening to Midnight Radio a few weeks back. this ones *really* short, like 10 episodes that are ~20 minutes each short, so its definitely lower commitment. in this one youre listening in on a radio show hosted by Sibyl, who died decades earlier but can still be heard waxing poetic about her hometown in the dead of night.

ok LAST ONE havent finished it so wasnt sure if i should rec it but a lot of people on my dash hype up Archive 81 so i thought id mention it at least. guy is hired to listen through a bunch of creepy tapes in some archive out in the middle of no where. classic horror podcast stuff. similar to eskew in that it pivots from mostly being mostly anthology into an overarching plot as you go on

[bronanlynch]

trying to get back into writing weekly roundup posts inspired by @/girlfriendofthegalaxy's tuesday again no problem series so here goes (disclaimer that these are not recommendations, as a rule I don't like recommending things to people because taste is so subjective and also because I enjoy doing analysis on things that are not good)

listening (podcast): making my way through the Gundam Wing episodes of Great Gundam Project. love to hear queer leftists talk about Gundam. it's fun to listen to now that I know more about Gundam, because when I watched Wing myself I knew literally nothing, and it's cool to get extra context but also cool to hear that some of my initial analysis still holds up. has the (un?)fortunate side effect of constantly making me wish I were watching Gundam

also obligatory shout out to Media Club Plus, a Hunter x Hunter rewatch podcast just started by some of the Friends at the Table folks, which I'm also enjoying a lot (this *is* a recommendation. please listen to Media Club Plus)

listening (music): so turns out I mostly listen to music when I'm driving these days, and right now the cd in my car's cd player is Avril Lavigne's Let Go, which is causing me to think a lot about a world in which Fire Emblem 3 Houses was an anime and there could be a sylvix+dimilix amv set to Complicated. also I've been fondly remembering that one wangxian sk8er boi amv that makes me cry every time I watch it

reading: recently finished The Archive Undying by Emma Mieko Candon. lots of divine-mechanical body horror and also a big win for fans of body sharing. very tasty, lots to chew on. I think I would have more to say about this one if I'd read it more quickly, but it was the book that I read a chapter or two every night before bed because that's a load-bearing part of my routine, and I think that meant that I sometimes lost track of some of the plot threads and shifting allegiances & motivations

currently reading The Water Outlaws by S.L. Huang, which I'm not far into but it's fun so far, and. sighs. Rule of Wolves by Leigh Bardugo. unfortunately because I couldn't remember exactly what happened in the books to properly compare it to the second season of Shadow & Bone I committed to rereading the whole series and, well, this could be compelling political intrigue except that's not where the focus is (it feels like there's a lot of words wasted on reiterating who the main characters are but not in particularly interesting ways or ways that show them changing very much, at least so far) so it's just simply not compelling to me

watching: rewatching Hunter x Hunter (2011) along with the Media Club Plus coverage. only on episode 6 so far but man what a good show

with my roommate, we've been slowly making our way through Elementary, because it's good to have on in the background while working on other things, and I do enjoy a competently written mystery. we also watched. uh. the Bionicle movies. those sure are movies that exist to sell toys to children. like, there's stuff in there that could be really interesting. as a kid I probably would've been obsessed. I'm glad I've seen them. they're not ""good movies""

now, this past weekend, instead of making any progress in any of the shows I was already watching, or fic I was writing, or anything like that, I saw a tumblr post that made a very compelling argument for spending the entire weekend watching all 16 episodes of 2021 k-drama The Devil Judge. this is a show for people who watched Tiger & Bunny and wanted Yuri (you know, everyone's favorite T&B side character, the guy who's a vigilante murderer and also a judge and also very sad) to be the main character (it's me. I wanted that.) anyway. this one's gonna be rattling around in my brain for a while. it's a dystopian legal drama with a significant helping of the gothic (gothic is here defined as when you're forced by circumstance to stay at the mysterious big house of an older wealthy man with secrets). it's about, among other things, corporate greed, the rise of fascism, systemic judicial inequality, the self-destructive catharsis of revenge, whether justice is possible in an unjust society, and having an intense homoerotic bond with your hot morally dubious coworker

oh yeah I'm also keeping up with the Ahsoka show because I was cursed at birth to care about Star Wars. I wish I liked it because I love Ahsoka and Sabine as characters but it's just simply not a well-made television show. really suffers from over-reliance on their Volume soundstage and various other issues that seem to stem from uninspired direction, but I've been especially disappointed with so many of the blocking choices

playing: finally getting back into playing Ace Attorney 5, which I paused literally three months ago and didn't pick up again until this week. there are parts of the game I've enjoyed (Athena is a cool character even if I dislike her mood matrix thing both mechanically and thematically; the mock trial conceit of 5-3 is fun; I like Blackquill & his bird) but other parts I do not enjoy (the transphobia oh my god I hoped I was free after getting past the homophobia & transmisogyny in 5-2 and then got hit with whatever the fuck they were doing with Robin in 5-3 please Ace Attorney be normal about trans people I am begging you)

making: we recently got B. Dylan Hollis's cookbook Baking Yesteryear, and made some maple-squash gems from the 1920s. not too much to say about these, they're nice muffins, tasty, not too hard to make. I think I would probably double the amount of cinnamon next time though

drinking: it's nog season which means it's time for the return of one of my favorite seasonal mixed drinks: eggnog (pumpkin, since that felt the Most seasonal) with a splash of Kraken spiced rum

writing: picking away at editing my t4t yurivain fic that was originally meant to be for Fire Emblem Trans Week, which was like a month and a half ago now. it's fine. everything is fine. anyway here's some lines:

“This feels like a test,” said Sylvain. “Is that your subtle way of telling me that I have to order our next round?” “Depends,” Yuri said, suppressing a laugh at the expression on Sylvain’s face, like he’d forgotten an answer during an exam. “What would you order for me?”

[why-its-kai]

ugh i need to move stuff on to the external drive again, storage is filling up again. i think it was mainly the ps2 isos i ripped for the emulator recently lol. tho it does look like half my storage is taken up by my video & music folders:

(actually just deleted a bunch of itunes downloads of podcasts i didn't listen to anymore and that freed up like 22GB holy shit)

surprised that my pictures folder is taking up so little space (12.1 GB) bc i have been downloading so many images and scanning things lately, thought that may have been the culprit for my storage filling up but that's hardly making a dent lmao.

anyways yea once my trigun remix dvds show up i'll be ripping those + all the bonus content, my existing trigun rip folder for both the funi complete series set + bonus features (which was just clean op&ed) and badlands rumble + bonus disc is about 5GB (tho it is only the eng dubbed episodes & movie, if i'd ripped the subbed versions too it'd probably double in size lol) so gotta make sure i have room for that. prob should move videos i'm not watching a lot over to the external drive to free up space for the remix rip lol

[dogsliampaynedoesntinstagram]

Thank you so much for the costs/benefits analysis, I agree with most of it and would like to add the benefits of the additional Pleasing sales (and the other brands they were peddling, like eliou) and free promo for MP. A lot of middle aged women and/or mothers also might feel better about Harry now (and buy his stuff), a huge prospective customer segment. And also the networking his team has made through Olivia, might come in handy, even if he quits film.

About the costs: Not sure the queerbaiting allegations are a bother, we might see them disproportionally. And it's hard to link the fact that there won't be an Oscar in Harry's future to the fake rs directly, it might rather be his airy attitude towards the movie business or...ehm...his acting. He's far from being an unbookable actor, but his fandom is a risk, which paid off for MP big time. All in all nobody can't say if Holivia got more or less butts in seats than it would've gotten otherwise.

Costs for Harry personally might be a decline in mental health due to the pressure he's been under for a long time from many different parties, like his label, his fans, witnessing the horrific misogyny and feeling responsible, maybe Olivia's side, maybe his loved ones (who might hate to see him troubled, or have to be a part of it, or hate stunts in general). I know that Harry is the best judge of what causes him pain, but with Holivia I'd say the chances that it didn't are very very low.

Another fickle thing is the loyalty of longtime, hardcore fans with staying power (and $$$). Right now I feel it's not a problem because of the perfect 'monster' Olivia was (obviously she isn't) and the gains in less engaged fans. But will the latter stay or move on in two years? The financial gain will still be much higher than the ~7% of highly invested fans who left (they did free promo for MP instead : )

Personally, I'd love love love to know where Harry's red line is, the thing he'd consider too high a cost...Anyway, sorry for spaming you with my thoughts, I always love to read yours, there is nobody else like you in fandom (heart emoji)

*************

Thanks for your thoughts anon. I absolutely agree that the advantage of going next level in his career is much wider than just the album an include things like Pleasing. With acting it's not so much that I think the fake relationship has stopped it from an Oscar, but it has contributed to their being lots of think pieces about how bad he is at acting.

I'm not sure where your approximately seven per cent of hard core fans left because of Holivia figure comes from. I would be very sceptical myself. There's always some sort of turnover of hardcore fans.

I like the way you discuss Harry's mental health I have found that discussions of the impact of the closet on Harry's mental health within fandom have a tendency to focus on things that cause fans distress (and are often part of the justification for that misogyny) an show no curiosity about Harry. I've always thought that there's no particular reason to assume that pretending to date people was the most damaging part of the closet - it could be difficult, but it might not be.

But I recently listened to the podcast with the pap who took the photos of Harry and Olivia at Jeff's wedding (episode 142). And there's one detail that I hadn't been able to stop thinking of. The pap talked about how Harry is known for really hating having his picture taken (he emphasised this a lot), but on this occasion Harry had a drink and was relaxed. I immediately thought of Michael Grandage's comments about the ease with which Harry played Tom drunk. That has really stuck with me.

Obviously there's a cost to being closeted in his life and also to being this famous, but we don't know how it manifests itself.

[clansocreations]

For Audio Drama Ask Game: 1, 5 and 12?

Okay so

1. First audiodrama you've ever listened to?

Depends on your definition I guess!

Excuse me one moment while I indulge in memories of my personal Hörspiel CD era. (Those who know me know exactly which CDs because I never shut up about them. And then I also liked radio stuff later I guess it really depends)

Like really I have been known to hold very long PowerPoint slideshows on this.

Also the Magnus Archives.

5. Audio (drama) specific trope you like.

Eyes. WEVE GOT EYES FOR DAYS FELLAS. Also that in horror podcasts there is (apart from a few usual suspects) none of the stuff that makes horror movies unbearable for me. Turns out just because I'm an absolute horror movie wimp doesn't mean I don't still have a taste for the morbid and weird and scary as fuck.

And this just. Works.

12. OHHHH THIS SURE IS A SPICY ONE

What public domain work would you adapt if you could

OH MY WORD I've never considered this but like. How awesome could a Freischütz audiodrama be. Or just a Gespensterbuch themed anthology.

The most famous story in that collection only exists as a folk tale, opera and musical (the latter with music by Tom Waits, I've seen it just this year and it's SO COOL, it's called the Black Rider and like. So good. Mhm.)

Also like. There's a forest. There's doomed love. And it's originally from a book of stories literally called "the ghost book" (Gespensterbuch)

Although in that same book there is also the story about the guy who played his instrument and a graveyard at night and suddenly had a very undead crowd of skeletons dancing the jig. Iirc.

That rabbit hole goes deep you guys. Anyways. If ya wanna read these and judge their anthologyworthiness there's an English version on Wikisource for both these stories which I shall link to promptly .

I'd love to hear those fully fleshed out especially Totentanz like can you imagine the sound design for a whole crowd of skeletons going all

Y'know?

[obsidiancreates]

My Spotify Wrapped (Kinda)

My family all share the Spotify account, but I'm for sure the one who uses it the most. Mainly because I tend to stay up until sunrise writing fanfic or scrolling Tumblr or reading fanfic while letting my playlist run in the background. ADHD babeyyyyyyyyy

But yeah so there's some of my family members mixed in here and I'll be doing the fun game of identifying where their influences show up in the wrapped!

Oh the scorecore is my brother. He made a whole playlist of Movie and Video Game scores he loves and he listens to it all the time. I know the Kung Fu Panda and Godzilla: King of the Monsters soundtracks so well (not complaining they slap).

Sorry for them all being different sizes. Anyway the middle orange one is for sure my brother's tastes mainly and the morning yellow one is probably largely him as well (though I do enjoy a good Energetic song that makes me writhe while grinning so it's not purely him). The last one is all me though and yeah mostly at night.

Goh fucking hell- I mean like I said my family of 4 all share this one account but still. I know a huge chunk of that was me, I-I'm looping Playing with Bad Luck by Set It Off right now and the other night I just sat there listening to Tainted Love for literal hours.

Oh this is for sure because the song is so fucking short. No way in hell this'd be winning if it was for the fact it's like 1 minute long and worked great for a couple night as Writing Background Music while I wrote Hobbit fics. If I had to guess my most looped after this I'd bet on an AJR song or a Set It Off or MCR one.

... Okay so I was almost right- I really listened to Lift Me Up that much? It is a fantastic Bagginshield song, granted, and just a fantastic song in general. I fucking love OneRepublic.

Cut Off is because of OFMD. I'm sorry that is exactly the song playing in Ed's head at the end of the finale.

This isn't a surprise except for the 0.1% TOP LISTENER HOLY FUCK UM YOU'RE WELCOME BOYS I GUESS HOLY- WHAT

I say as I loop one of their songs making this post.

Yeah this one is all me, except Imagine Dragons is probably a combo me and my dad, he also loves them.

WHAT THE- MY BROTHER AND I HAVE LIKE 3 PODCASTS WE LISTEN TO AND ONE OF THOSE ONLY UPLOADS A SINGLE EPISODE A YEAR

I KNOW THEY'RE ALL 1 HOUR+ BUT STILL

I cannot stress enough that these are the only 5 podcasts we have ever listened to on Spotify and that I've only listened to like 5 episodes maximum from G!MFST and The Cryptid Factor.

This is the one that only uploads a single episode a year by the way. And between my brother and I we spent over half our entire podcast time on it. Granted, I did use it to fall asleep to for a couple of months there. After a few gos around learning the jokes in and out, it was a very reliable Background Noise to lull me to sleep and make sure my dreams didn't get too anxiety-inducing. Highly recommend it!

I can't tell if this is because my brother loves a lot of music from past decades or if it's because I almost exclusively listen to songs form the early 2000's or 2010's with the exception of a few select bands and songs. ... It's probably both, neither of us keep up with current music trends.

SHOCKED that no Goo Goo Dolls made it onto this!

[mauannacreates]

Writeblr introduction:

About:

Hey guys, I'm Mauanna, and I am a writer who loves to spread my knowledge about writing, while also trying to learn new things from courses, stories that are shown either in movies, books or tv shows or listening to podcasts!

It's a bit hectic to juggle all of these with my day job at times, but I still try to manage that, the stories that I create and this blog and a semi-newsletter thing that I do at Substack called The Story Student which I try to update every two weeks.

Oh, and sometimes I find myself in the deep intricacies of the web. Just spiraling throughout and trying to see how much I can learn about certain topics in a certain amount of time before I realize that it's pretty late in the night. 😅

Stories:

Current Book WIP: Conjured Secrets. (SoR Book 1)

The current series that I am writing is the Sorcerer of Runes series, which started out as a game idea in 2021, but has since evolved into a story in 2022 with lots of complexity and other things to know about my characters, the world they like in and the story as a whole.

I try to work on my stories every day, even if it's as little as a few hundred words, I try to make sure to update it day by day, from handwritten to typing and anything you can think of! (Even dictating, but I really do prefer to have that little voice guiding me as I'm typing than for me to speak it out)

Now, for the type of stories that I write, they're very family centric. A lot of the ideas that I am currently writing about also seems to be running along the lines of a fantasy-based world called the Sorcerer of Runes series.

There are four Elemental worlds that would be explored quite a bit throughout the series, but that's not the basis of this series. We start in an unknown land, one where there's a palace with lots of shadows lurking around the place. It explores on the secret alliances on who to trust, while also finding a prophecy of Spirit. One where it proclaims that Light and Dark will be Connected to Spirit for when the time comes. They refer to this, as the end.

This adventure is something that will also be friend focused, yet there's some tension, a hint of romance brewing and lots of layers to this story that will question each of the character's intentions.

If you do want to see how some of my past writing is like, you can check out flufftober 2023 where I have written stories of my characters as a fun yet experimentation thing. I can't say that all of the things on there are accurate, I really did enjoy doing it.

Something you may also notice when you step to the blog and look at my story, is that I really like centering the stories I make on anthropomorphic characters. I guess there's a lot of distinction that you can create with animal characters that… Ok, yes you can do it for people too, I just like animals doing people things and it's something that you don't really see that often, especially considering that cartoons, movies or kiddie books that shows it a lot more, or it's an obscene thing in some literature that I've read… But hey, I also like researching the different kinds of animals too. 😎 Is there a possibility I'd make it on people? Maybe. That's something we'll have to wait and see if it happens another day.

Another thing that I seem to want to do is to make tag games. I'm not too sure if some of the tags that I make exists already, but I do hope that people enjoy it regardless. If you want some tag games that I've made that you want to be part of, here the Character personality associations playlist and the Word associations to story tag for starters! If I make enough tag games, I'll probably put it as a blog site of its own, but we'll see.

Extra information that I don't really know where to fit it, or it isn't relevant, but decided to put here anyway:

I think I am an INFP, if we are going by cognitive function terms. Especially since I landed that MBTI first before going all around the world, because hey! There's no way I'd be an INFP! Before ending back at it seven years later.

Well this is what I think, but I think I heard at least from a writing workshop that I went to that my mind has so many ideas that I could probably think of ideas for multiple prompts and there'd be lots of interpretations that'll come up. And another thing I notice is that I'm really interactive with people, so I'm probably a self denying ENTP or an ENFP 😂

In fact, I find with my story process, as much as I'd love to write stuff down and explore with how it's written, but there's some points where I am rigid with it until proven otherwise.

I love to see things develop into something better. But sometimes, it's as if the original ideas are better. Though I do like to add stuff that's more current to the character's relationships to each other and the events that they've been through.

For those who are interested in knowing where to find the tags of my characters, you can find it in the Tags Masterpost.

Anyway, I hope you enjoy this updated version of writeblr as well as enjoy the stuff that I post on this blog.

[life-picked-up-along]

Thougts

About the mock orals, I'm kinda ready ?? Not as I could be and obviously I will have to work some more tomorrow before school (and during the physic class let's be honest), but I'm happy with what I achieved by tonight already.

These past few days I have been thinking about how next year will be my last year of highschool, and how miserable I have been during all the years I already spent there, and before even. Like during summer I'm always feeling up to autumn and winter, but when it's there I'd give anything for it to go away. However, I'm (again, by the end of the school year and beginning of summer) feeling energized and motivated for a new school year. I don't want to lose this feeling, I mean I know I wil but I want to be able to gain it back around the end of summer, so I'm gonna write here my realistic ideas for a better seasonal mood.

-Listen to spooky podcast (what is even that I just learned it existed)

-Go work at a cafe that would be mine, like not those cafes everybody goes to, because I want to feel at home

-Get that subscription to the library sorted out to be able to go in there and take anything if I feel like it

-Remember that school is just a process of learning new things and sure you're gonna gest tested sometimes but that's not the point, what matters is to be curious for eveything

-Read a lot, a whole lot, anything really who's gonna care for what I read in the train anyway

-get some rest, some sleep, which means I've got to keep up with my studying by instauring a routine I'd stick myself to always, like going to the library after school when it's open, otherwise to the cafe, stay after school until my work is done and then come home so that my bedroom is a place to rest

-sometimes, take the train before the usual to stop by starbucks in the morning because I'm always missing out on seasonal drinks

-reserve the saturday's afternoon for resting, like literally sleeping or watching a movie, or reading... Try and avoid more "small" divertisment like instagram, tik tok...

-My room is gonna be the cosiest place to spend fall and winter anyway so that's amazing and exterior factor are pushing me to keep myself in my best shape (by starting salsa haha)

[yirrah748]

Chapter Two: To The Seaside (Part Two)

NOTE TO SELF:

I may have forgotten to include this, but our home (where we're from) is in the middle of the country, and our hometown (where we're going) is about north, the very edge of the north. So just to get to those pristine waters is long, hard work. That's why we rarely go there. When I was a kid, I didn't really understand, but now, I kinda do.

I definitely understood more about it when my parents told me that when I was three and we went there (when we had no car yet), I threw up on the bus, and Dad was drenched in my vomit. They learned about two lessons there. One, don't bring a baby on a long trip. Two, if you want to bring your baby, make sure you feed them antihistamine first, and bring an extra set of clothes too, for the parents and the baby.

1 PM

We passed by a tollgate and listened to the podcast on the radio, so I turned my music off. The content they were giving was ok, not something I would really like very much, but also not something that I would hate. The people were talkative and lively. I couldn't remember what they said but it was really entertaining to listen to.

During that time, wide meadows were beside the tollway, on the background were rows of mountains. Higher above, the sky was made of refreshing blue, with white clouds scattered like wisps of cotton.

We didn't know an hour had already passed and the podcast had ended.

3 PM

Not much had happened during 2 PM, it's mostly traffic. With the sun high up, it was very hot, and most of us were sweating. My stomach had calmed down so I ate what we had.

Bored after eating, we passed by a cemetery. A couple of graves have a cell room made for them. I asked what use those roofs were anyway, since their bodies were already inside a coffin. But it was not in my place to interfere. They do what they like, and I do mine.

Surprised on the sight, my uncle and mom talked about it. Listening to their chatter, I had to restrain myself so hard to not say:

"Uncle don't worry, you'll also have your own room when you die. I'll make sure of it."  

It was a bad joke.

4 PM

We later arrived at the entrance of the province. We were still quite far away, Dad had to admit, but we are only a few dozen kilometers away before reaching Dad's hometown. He was quite excited at that fact and decided to take a picture of us near the welcome arc of the region. I did not hesitate to take a picture, I was not welcoming to it, but I did not hesitate. I don't like taking pictures, but I like looking at pictures of others. I see myself as someone ugly, and my looks shouldn't be saved and shown to others, probably to laugh at. And for every picture they take, my self-esteem lowers. I guess it's because I was conscious that they were observing me and I was concerned about what they think of me.

After the picture, my parents both told me to smile more. They said I should try smiling in the mirror more often. But how could I practice and stare at the mirror when I would look away from it every so often. My looks were unbearable, and my fashion tastes questionable. If the mirror had a face, it too would probably look at me in disgust.

Enough of this self-pity though, I don't like it, it just makes me feel like the situation I am in is the worst when it isn't. In that thought, my cousin's family came to mind. During this summer, she has to take care of their store, tutor her siblings, take care of the youngest, try to find work, and even nurse her mother sometimes. And she's fifteen! I worry and admire her sometimes, whenever I go there, my mood lifts up, since the people around me are able to fight such tough battles, I just get inspired and feel their energy in the wind and get it too. Sometimes after I just get home from my cousins' home, tired and all, I'd clean my room even if it's already 7 pm and Dad is watching a movie after picking me up.

After overcoming my self-pity and got bored of my thoughts, I turned to my side and took a nap.

6 PM

We passed by another welcome arc and I was woken up to take a picture. I did the usual and tried to get back to sleep. Suddenly, my mom laughed out loud after inspecting the pictures.

In the picture, my eyes were drowsy, my clothes unkept, and there was a wet stain on my left shoulder made out of drool. It's disgusting but lol.

6:30 PM

Glancing outside, we passed by a market. Dad, Uncle, and Mom started discussing our consumables like water, shampoo, soap, food, etc. We didn't bring much of those and only for the trip. So they went shopping and Mom dressed me up. She told me I was to meet my new relatives and I had to be polite, well fuck. I was not exactly a polite person, but I was also not rude, I guess. I was just awkward. Like, after saying the usual greetings, I'd stay silent throughout and just listen to them. I was afraid that they would think that I was not contributing to the conversation, but it was really because I had nothing in my life that was notable about. Most of the time, I was playing online games with friends, doing some research and caring for my plants. Not doing traveling and going outside!

[TBC, Updates every Friday]

[inkskinned]

i turn 29 on july 1st. i feel like i make a lot of these notes to myself, to check in. hi, me, here's what's happening.

hi, me. hi, you, too, if you keep reading. here's some rules i have been following:

when a book is bad, i put the book down. i choose something i like instead. when i don't like a movie, i don't make myself watch until the end. i care less and less what people think about me and focus more on being a good friend.

for the 6 months or so, i've been asking people what they think should be my next book or tv show. i ask them where i should go on a walk next week. i ask them what food i should try next, what hobby. and then i write it down in front of them.

the truth is some stuff slips through the cracks. but most of the time? within two weeks, i get to send my favorite kind of text - so i tried the thing you were talking about and !

i have a new policy for split-second choices - it's better to try it. i have social anxiety. i have to talk myself into doing many things. i am constantly battling the desire to run away as far as my feet will take me. and then i stand up and i do the thing anyway. i make myself act and dance and sing. sometimes, yes, i know-immediately never again, i hate this. but most of the time - i just have fun with it.

i have a new mantra - nobody is scorekeeping. at the end of my life, there will be no grand reading of how many calories i'd been eating. no reviews on how many boring documentaries i forced myself through, no calculation on how many hours i endured an extremely dull educational podcast. and so what if i try karaoke and i don't actually nail it? so what if i stumble over my words while trying to make a public announcement? so what if i wear something too-showy to go to the grocery store? nobody there knows me, and: nobody's keeping score.

life doesn't resolve with a grade (i know, i was as shocked as everyone else when i realized it). i am not falling behind, because there's no curriculum to life that i should be following. there are no checkpoints; nobody is making sure i have a fully-furnished life resume. i am just here for as long as the earth will have me, and i get to decide what makes me happy.

i don't have a partner or a house or anything that is supposed to belong to people-my-age. i spend most of my time focusing on being kind, compassionate, ready to listen without restraint.

and honestly? i feel good. like actually. i kind of like it this way.