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uhhhitsme · 1 month

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002: Duke Keane?

002 | Give me a character & I will tell you

How I feel about this character:

All the people I ship romantically with this character:

My non-romantic OTP for this character:

My unpopular opinion about this character:

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon:

my OTP:

my cross over ship:

a headcanon fact:

one: i am so sorry for the extremely late response. i started writing this yesterday and finished the questions but then my page reloaded and it all got sent to shit and it was 12 am so i just. gave up. two: youre so cool btw thank you for all the lovely comments on my fics :DDDDD three: so hahahahahah i havent watched nmt2. and by extension have not seen killer track. ITS FINE.

HOW I FEEL ABOUT THIS CHARACTER: i desperately need this guy to give me a hug none of you get it. it would actually fix me. like im being so serious right now maybe some of you gay fucks (/lh) want to dick him down i need him to give me the biggest hug in the entire world it would make my entire life so much better. i absolutely adore him with my entire heart---he treats hannah nicely!!!!!!! in the witch in the web!!!!!!!!!!!! he's so freaking sweet to her!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! his dynamic with ms. holloway is so cute!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! he desperately wants to do good for the world, to make a change in someones life, to help others, and that sparks so so so much joy i love him so much.

ALL THE PEOPLE I SHIP ROMANTICALLY WITH THIS CHARACTER: well obviously. ms. holloway. THE power couple of all time. wilbur because it would be funny. and. uh. ted. NOT BECAUSE ITS A BUDGET CURTWEN SHIP. WELL YES. A LITTLE. but also because i read two wonderful fics by amythestunarmed (?) (i think) on ao3 that dstroyed me and i desperately am in need for more content their dynamic is so cute.

MY NON ROMANTIC OTP FOR THIS CHARACTER: probably him and rose. i dont know anything about rose but idk i feel like theyd be a fun duo.

MY UNPOPULAR OPINION ABOUT THIS CHARACTER: okay so i dont really get why i see people all the time being like "everyone treats duke as a sidekick!! we need more love for duke!!" like idk man. he seems pretty popular to me. i see a billion trillion analysis posts for him all the time. maybe because im not really that into the hatchetfield fandom i like dont get it but 🤷 i do think he deserves the attention i love him so much the guy ever!!!!!

ONE THING I WISH I WOULD HAPPEN WITH THIS CHARACTER: guys im delusional i genuinely think he and ms. holloway could have a happy ending in miss holloween. i know they wont get it. BUT PLEASE. PLEASE. PLEASE. PLEASE THEY LOVE EACHOTHER. PLEASE ITS NOT FAIR. PLEASE. IT MAKES ME SO UPSET PLEASE I WILL DO ANYTHING IN THE ENTIRE WORLD. JUST LET THEM LOVE EACHOTHER. PLEASE.

MY CROSSOVER SHIP: uhhh i dont neccarily have one but someone should put him with keith swanson for the sillies

HEADCANON: i think ms holloway has a thing about pie??? he doesnt actually like it but he comes to the diner all the time to eat it anyway because homeslice is down BADDDDDD. this might contradict canon but it would be really funny to me if he's shit with animals. or on the flipside. he's TOO good with animals. they follow him around all the time and he doesnt know how to make them go away. modern snow white fr

#mars says stuff #duke keane

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ap41cu5 · 3 months

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can you do joseph x reader when the reader have a nightmare when reader wake up from the nightmare but she doesn't wake joseph up because she doesn't to bother him but he can't sleeping without her and he comfort her

Plagued Dreams

Joseph Oda x F! Reader Rating: Fluff Genre: One-Shot Fluff Word Count: 1173 Short Synopsis: The reader wakes up from a nightmare that used to persist often in the past. The incident causing the nightmare had troubled her for months and she had seemingly recovered from it. But the nightmare returned, and the reader, who didn't want to wake up her fiance (Joseph Oda), begins to have a meltdown in the living room. Joseph hears her cries and immediately goes to comfort her. A/N: im gonna be honest this is not my best work and i am so sorry that i posted this so late but i do hope that you enjoy this nonetheless! i havent had much time to write as usual, and i apologize if this fic isnt as long as you were hoping

“Holy shit, oh my God..” you whispered to yourself, your head aching as you rubbed your temples.

You had just woken up in a cold sweat, gasping for air as the sheets clung uncomfortably to your body.

What the hell?

You couldn’t wrap your head around it. You had gotten over it years ago, so why did it come back now? You hadn’t even thought about the incident in months. Why was such a tragic memory coming back to haunt you?

It wasn’t your fault. It was never your fault, so why was it that you could never shake the feeling of guilt that washed over you whenever it was mentioned?

You looked over to Joseph, who was peacefully lying beside you, the sheets sloppily thrown on top of him and one of his arms carefully wrapped around your torso. His lips slightly parted and his head tilted, even lightly snoring. The clock on his nightstand read: 3:23AM.

You were always so grateful to be engaged to a man like him. He was smart, had a delightfully dry sense of humor, beyond compassionate, sweet, and such a gentleman. He always had a knack for reading you like a book– like all of your thoughts were written above your head for him to see. You balanced each other out wonderfully, rendering the both of you the perfect team.

You moved to gently shake him, but checked the clock one last time before your hand had the chance to make contact with the resting man. The small lettering beside the time read in all caps: TUE. That’s right. It was a Tuesday morning, meaning you both had work. It wouldn’t be fair to wake him up and have him miss out on sleep because of you.

Carefully retracting your hand, your eyes still scanning his sleeping form, you gently took the covers off of you and got up out of bed. You gently lifted his arm off of you and placed it atop your pillow, hoping he wouldn’t notice the difference as you began to make your way towards the living room.

Carefully shutting the bedroom door behind you, you immediately headed for the kitchen to treat yourself to a cold glass of water.

The cold liquid made your throat ache as you gulped it down. It was oddly refreshing, and seemed to clear your head during the brief moment. The night was silent, the only sound rushing through air being the occasional buzzing of cars passing through the intersection outside the kitchen window.

Placing your glass in the kitchen sink, you made your way towards the couch. Maybe watching a bit of TV would help put me back to sleep, you thought. Plopping down on the couch and grabbing the remote, you flipped through a couple channels before finally settling for the news. Since it was three in the morning, you had a feeling nothing good would be on anyway.

You tried as hard as you could to focus on the news, but the incident refused to leave your fatigued, debilitated mind. Images seemed to flash through your head, no matter how badly you tried to think about anything else. Nothing seemed to work. It was suffocating. You hugged your knees as you felt your chest begin to tighten. The low sounds emitting from the TV seemed to fade into nothingness as everything around you seemed to crumble from beneath your fingertips. Your breathing became heavy as you tried your hardest to snap yourself out of it. Tears cascaded down your cheeks and the walls seemed to cave in around you.

“(First Name)?” The sound of Joseph’s voice seemed to cut through the haze of your anxiety.

He quickly took your side, wrapping one of his arms around your back as his other hand moved to cup your cheek.

“Hey, it’s alright. I’ve got you,” Joseph quietly muttered to you as he gently pulled you towards him.

The feeling of his arms around you immediately helped you to ground yourself again. His embrace was warm and his words were comforting. You turned, slowly wrapping your arms around him as you sobbed into his chest.

Joseph stroked your hair, “It’s alright, you’re alright. I’m here,” he whispered into your ear.

He laid backwards onto the couch, allowing for you to lay on him as you held him. His scent was awfully soothing, and his warmth only added onto it. His arms were carefully wrapped around your waist as he pulled you in. One arm placed around your hips, the other gently rubbing your back.

“It wasn’t your fault. It never was.”

At this point, you were squeezing him. Your head buried in his chest, your legs wrapped around each other’s, his head in your hair.

It always took you a while to finally calm down whenever you’d experience any panic attacks or meltdowns related to the incident. But Joseph was always there for you, every step of the way. Willing to do whatever it took to help you calm down no matter how long it took. He never grew impatient, not once.

He grabbed you a couple of tissues to blow your nose with while he wiped away your tears.

“Why didn’t you wake me up, (First Name)?” Joseph asked, his thumb wiping away a tear as he caressed your cheek.

You sniffled, “I.. I didn’t want to bother you. You looked so peaceful while you were sleeping, and– and you’ve had to do this for me so many times already. And you have work in the morning–” “(First Name), I will always be here for you whenever you need me. I love you, (First Name). I’ve never been more sure about anyone else before. You are the most sweet, thoughtful person that I know. That’s the reason that I’m marrying you,” Joseph tilted your head towards him.

You chuckled, “you’re so sweet, Joseph. I love you so much, I really don’t deserve you.”

“You never give yourself enough credit, (First Name). I know better than anyone how amazing you are. I can say with full confidence that you deserve the whole world and more. I love you, (First Name),” Joseph murmured, cupping your cheek in one of his hands.

Taking one of your hands in his, he gently coaxed you back up onto your feet.

With one arm around your waist as he began helping you back towards the bedroom, he gave you a kiss on the cheek.

“Let’s head back to bed, my love. And after work, why don’t we visit that new cafe that just opened up? It’s been awhile since we’ve gone on a proper date, and I think you deserve the treat,” Joseph gave you a slight smile as he tucked you in.

Climbing into bed beside you, you immediately wrapped your arms around his waist to cuddle him. With your head on his chest, listening to his steady heartbeat, and one of his hands gently stroking your hair, you felt yourself almost immediately drift back off to sleep.

#joseph oda #joseph oda x reader #the evil within #the evil within 2 #fanfic #fanfiction #juli kidman #reader insert #sebastian castellanos #tew x reader

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kewpidity · 4 months

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Okay So i had a brain blast about my ship with alastor so this is gonna be the Definite Kewpie x Alastor Ship Post that covers everything i have so far about it ↷↷↷

so this whole thing starts because somehow someway i get a demon attached to me as a kid, a toddler even, dont really know how or why, but because of this my whole life growing up is plagued by insane near death experiences all orchestrated by this demon (this is based on some real shit in my life btw, not to sound superstitious or anything and i dont even think i believe in demons of any denomination but there was some Weird Shit going on, i might talk about it someday) and by the time im an adult ive tired everything under the sun to stop these things from happening- different religious practices, spells and charms and rituals and so on and so forth im at my god damn limit im so tired

eventually im pushed to try to fight fire with fire, and end up summoning Another demon to try and idk cancel out the old one? make a deal to keep me safe? not sure What my plan was but i'd come this far and i didnt know where else to turn

well the demon i summoned was alastor. he wasnt even my intended target, in fact of demon of his power shouldnt really be able to be summoned at all under normal circumstances, and would require someone with a ton of power of their own to pull it off (havent decided if this is something i managed to do because of all the varied rituals etc mentioned earlier, or some dumb luck) and that alone is kind of intriguing for him

tbh he hasnt been summoned in a While, its something that got lost to time and he kinda assumed it would never happen again, and even when it happened before he would usually just kill the person without bothering to strike a deal, cause even people who did manage to do it usually werent strong enough to do it safely

but hell has been kinda Boring lately, the hotel hasnt given him as much entertainment as he had hoped (this is like. mid season 1, and with the understanding that the story stretches way longer than the breakneck speed the actual show takes) and he sees this as an opportunity for something interesting to do for a while

when he hears what im looking for, he's gotta laugh about it- there's no way this other demon that had attached to me would give him any trouble, and this was a great way to guarantee he get another soul when i eventually died anyway, so he offers up this deal:

for a few hours a day he gets complete control over my body, a full on possession to do whatever he wants with that time.

obviously im hesitant, but we go back and forth on it a bit before deciding to make the deal with some ground rules (like he cant do anything thats gonna get me killed prematurely for example- after all im doing this specifically so i dont die by another demon's hand)

so we strike the deal! no all he has to do is get rid of that other demon and my soul is as good as his! its not that simple tho of course- he's not sure how the demon is accessing the living world, and figures its likely similar to what he's doing- somehow tethering himself to the living world, while their actual physical body is still in hell, so he needs to figure that out on his end, and it ends up being a more difficult task than previously expected- so he could be dealing with something older and more powerful than he realizes.

he'll figure that out later tho, he's got living stuff to do! at first he's v dismissive when i ask him what he could possibly want to be doing with my body, like what was he even planning to get up to, but he cant keep me completely in the dark about it cause im still sorta There when im possessed- its a bit like lucid dreaming where you're aware that you're dreaming, but not quite aware enough to control what you're Doing in the dream, and over time i become more and more present the longer he's possessing me

so eventually he admits that he's curious about what happened after he died- he was a bit of a celebrity when he was alive after all, he's sure it would cause Quite a stir when it was revealed after he died that he was a criminal- a moonshiner for one, but a serial killer and cannibal! he wants to know if there was a media circus, where he was buried, wants to visit his old stomping grounds, and so on and so forth. this leads me on all kinds of adventures through the deep south, the dusty aisles of libraries and newpaper archives, old graveyards, and so on, all the while we keep getting more comfortable and close despite ourselves

and eventually i realize that he isnt actually interested in what happened to himself after his death, he's actually using all this to try and find out what happened to his mother. she was Not a local celebrity, and his infamy was so large that it eclipsed most of the people he knew in life, so tracking it all down was kind of a hassle. but he was and is a mama's boy, and he wanted to know if she lived a good life

now all of this eventually winds down to figuring out why there was that first demon attached to me, probably some fucked up nonsense a little while back in my family tree or something (tbh im not sure how much i want to focus on the how and why but we'll see) and we get that settled finally as well as finding out how alastor's mom's life played out and put him at east there, and all that's left is to simply live my life until i die, where i'll go to hell and alastor will have my soul to keep (we're v cozy at this point and quite comfortable cohabiting a body and mind space so he's not particularly eager to completely break the tether until my time comes)

and the thing about sharing a mindspace with something extremely dangerous and powerful that has just enough sway over the world around you to keep you safe in a bad situation, or even fully take over your body to get you out of it, is that you feel v confidant most of the time and fear isnt really something you deal with anymore, so i frequently go wandering around the woods at night for example because im sure nothing can really touch me when i have a demon for a companion

a demon in your head cant protect you from a bullet however, and maybe i should have known better than wandering the woods at night during deer season, and maybe the unholy aura i had around me hit the moonlight just wrong and the hunter thought he was aiming for the silhouette of a creature with antlers, and then i was dead

and then i wake up in hell

if this was a fic, at this point it would be like the 'part 2' (and who knows if i iron it out enough maybe i Will write it sometime) and im not sure exactly what i want to do about it just yet obviously it would loosely follow the canon of the show, just with a lot of extra stuff thrown in. maybe in 'part 1', we didnt actually Kill the other demon, just broke away from it, and its still in hell somewhere, fuming about losing my soul, or maybe finding out about his mom actually did Not put alastor at ease- maybe his actions made her life very difficult and now he has to deal with knowing that and i can use that as a catalyst to him getting redeemed to see her again in heaven, not sure yet!

but i do know a big part of the interpersonal situation is that we dont share that mindspace anymore, we're just physically There Together and tbqh its really difficult to cope with. we both got so used to it that we feel like something's missing now, and we might even go so far as to try to find a way to reestablish that mental link, or maybe there's still echoes of it lingering, but only if we're asleep or something like that

like i said, still ironing out the hell part of it all, but thats what ive got! much to think about much to think about

and to add to this- some stray little Thoughts and Ideas to play around with in regards to this story:

while researching alastor's life and 'hunting grounds' we run into a copycat killer, probably someone who has a personal collection of alastor's things, works at a library maybe, who's always dreamed of following in his footsteps, and that decides i should be the first victim since im also sooo interested in alastor's 'work' that i surely wouldnt mind (i do, and so does alastor (he does Not consider imitation as flattery and who tf does this loser think they are coming after something that belongs to him (he's gotten attached)))

i for sure need to come up with more fun and awful little adventures like that

alastor's ability to effect and manipulate the living world around me through his powers alone (so like Not literally using my body for example, this is more like a poltergeist) is stronger when there's radio static playing in the air

going off the idea that the mental link gets stronger and clearer the long it lasts, maybe at sone point it gets so strong that one time when i go to sleep, i 'wake up' in a v similar state as when alastor was first possessing me, that floaty, kinda-lucid-kinda-not, excpet now im hitching a ride in His body in hell and at this point he's so used to having me as a v general and vague presense at the back of his mind that he doesnt even notice at first that im much more clearly and actively There- its a frightening idea for us both when the realization sets cause now we Really gotta face whays going on here and how far its gone

when i get shot by the hunter, alastor is actively co-piloting my body at the time, and since i headcanon he died in a similar fashion (bullet to the head) its like he experienced his own death all over again (something something tied even in our death etc etc) and he sort of 'wakes up' back in his body afterwards and after realizing what happened having to fight the urge to be seen frantically searching the streets for me now that i must be here

considering we Were linked up when i died, and the black mark this whole situation would leave on my soul, my demon form would probably echo his design

how far am i willing to go while alive to achieve our goals- ive definitely been put in situations where i needed to do harm for survival, but would i go further than that, not because i needed to, but because i wanted to? is it alastor's influence or something that i was always capable of? do i indulge in cannibalism? what about after im in hell, what then?

thinking on it, i think Will go with alastor's mom suffering from his life choices, and him having to deal with that, as Well as having to deal with that first demon in 'part 2' to carry over as an overarching plot

maybe we Both get redeemed but we dont actually like it in heaven like its too bright so we fuckin.

act up to get sent back (this is mostly jokey but could you imagine)

#proship selfship #proselfship #selfproship #❤ Blood and Velvet

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dailyoyo · 1 month

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thabk yoi a lot dailyoyo your brains are very compelling to me it kind of makes me want to study you like ants . i quote you all the time like i tell my friends " i stole this sentiment / headcanon from a deranged yoyo tumblr account " . you are aspirational really Truly we need more dailyoyos in the world i cant stop thinking about lawyer yoyo now .... also i beg for more dissecting of yoyo and mew dynamics if ur Into That . theuve always been really interesting to me but honestly like 4 pieces of canonexist in jsr ever so

VERY DELIGHTFUL ASK TO GET. i love to hear that i have had a net impact in making people get weirder. its so important to me. making the jsr fandom worse one post at a time <3

a lot of the way i post in here is inspired by both my friends but also some of the crazy bitches (affectionate) ive seen around over in the dragon ball z fandom in particular, but really i think ANYONE in the world no matter the fandom has the god-given right to tear characters apart with their teeth and make them fail as fuck and really really really sick in the head in ways they were probably not intended to be read as in canon. Everypony out there get eviler!!!!!!!!!!!! Now.

IM GLAD YOU LIKE LAWYER YOYO I THINK ABOUT HIM A LOT TOO. hes fascinating to me in that like hes technically not a Bad Ending (MOST of that au technically isnt!) and yet objectively he is a worse outcome because in regular(paradox) canon theres an avenue for yoyo to heal and become less bastardous. because like he has genuine friends and positive interactions and reasons to Want to be more than a self serving shithead. and also hes 16 of course hes an asshole hes 16.

but with lawyer yoyo its like. Its too late. He grew up and he stayed like that and he does not care to change and he has no impetus to change. hes definitely living a safer and more comfortable life and he has much higher self-esteem but he is Staying dead inside. Like ok regular yoyo and lawyer yoyo are both mentally at the bottom of basically the same exact well but lawyer yoyo was like "fuck it" and built a house down there. do you get me

Oh fuck this post is getting so long and i havent even talked about mew and yoyo yet.

okay so liek. beat was yoyo's first proper Friend in the ggs (as opposed to "just tolerating him being around"). because beat kind of totally fell for yoyo's whole harmless schtick lmao. but mew was the first Real Friend in that she picked up on how much of a fake fuck yoyo was and decided to hang out with him anyway.

which. ADMITTEDLY. this was originally BECAUSE she was fascinated by yoyo being so insincere (for a while he was also really playing up the "ohoho i'm TOOOTALLY not a double agent" thing for shits and giggles even though he literally wasnt.). and as previously mentioned yoyo had a crush on her which is why he didnt realize mew could see right through him. honestly for a while he kind of thought he had totally had her under his thumb but the whole time mew was like "Awww hehe he thinks im only hanging out with him because of his manipulations, thats so cute ^_^" (<- DERANGED)

and in a way while they were already friends their friendship didnt Truly start until after yoyo confessed his love and was rejected. because like the whole thing was kind of a wakeup call for yoyo - mew had noticed his feelings all along and was waiting for him to say something Just to reject him, and like among normal people that would probably be a lot more hurtful but in that circumstance it was like... she'd outplayed him. easily. and he didn't even notice, but she's still here anyway. and she still wants to hang out with him even though she can tell the kind of person he is.

because the thing is like. mew may play up her innocence and naivety but she IS genuinely kind at heart. a lot of her strange desire to examine nasty people under a microscope is because of her desire to see the humanity in everyone, to understand Why people do the things they do. and she's not under any illusions that she can """Fix Him""", god knows she's not sure she can even "fix" herself, but she saw yoyo for what he was and could respect the survival mechanisms at play for what they were. (this is also why mew was so immediately like "idk Yoyo doesn't seem like that kind of person..." when the nt-3000 thing happened because. like. she Understood his modus operandi and that simply Wasn't It.)

and like when youre the kind of person who thinks that as soon as someone sees under your mask that they'll want you dead in a ditch, knowing someone who recognizes your mask and is just like "oh cool, i got one too" is kind of world-shaking. paradoxically them recognizing each others' insincerity makes them be a lot more sincere with each other.

Oh fuck this post long as hell. yoy

#mod noname #noname's paradoxposting #i keep thinking ''im not in the hypfix anymore so idk if i can do an infodump''#and then i start typing and something fucking happens #ITS LITERALLY. I FEEL SO VISCERALLY IN MY HEART THESE DYNAMICS #BUT ITS SO HARD TO CONVEY MY EXACT FEELINGS INTO CONCISE WORDS.#GUAAAAGHRGH.

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wellthatsunfortunate444 · 2 months

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this is gonna be a long ass rant about my 'friend' feel free to ignore, i just need to get this out somewhere cuz im literally shaking she makes me so mad <3

i have this friend, S, and she always goes on about how we are so close and she loves me and she hopes college (im in the uk so its college for 16-18) doesnt separate us and that we stay close etc etc.

but then shes such a bitch and i rlly dont know why im still friends with her. shes rlly insensitive about sh, i mentioned to her when i was younger that i did it and she was supportive, but now she makes jokes about it all the time and she doesnt know i didnt stop at 13.

i have a lot of family issues, and shes well aware of them, but she always tries to make me feel guilty about stuff e.g my mum has adhd and my younger brother has autism & adhd (im considered a young carer) and they both have physical health issues, so it can take ages for me to be able to leave the house if im getting dropped off. theres no bus that goes direct to her house (and i dont want to have to walk over an hour everytime i see her. i could but adding on the bus journey i would spend about 2 hours travelling just to see her, and she always insists i go to her so it would be rlly unfair. (i cant have friends over due to multiple reasons and omg does she bitch about that. she could still come to my town with me but she never has)) and i cant afford to uber all the time so my mum often drives me but we are late a lot. ive told her countless times that i cant control when i leave since there are so many outside factors out of my hands, and she always complains when im late and says its disrespectful that i dont turn up on time among other things.

shes an only child and lives with both parents who do everything for her, so she cant even begin to understand how stressful basic things can be for me and my family. my dad doesnt live with me (he also is undergoing treatment for brain cancer which she doesnt give a shit about, and even says stuff like "oh well you can still go out even if hes visiting, its not that big of a deal" if i tell her i cant go out cuz hes over on a break from chemo)

now shes mad at me because we are going to a mutual sleepover tmrw and she wanted to host pre drinks (which i honestly think is kinda pointless) with another friend before walking to the sleepover together. i asked my mum if she would take me and she initially said yes, but then she changed her mind because its easier to drop me to the mutual friends house from mine, and she doesnt see the point in driving further just for me to have to walk 30 minutes from S's house anyway. when i told S, she said that i was making excuses cuz i didnt wanna go, and that i dont make enough effort since if it were her she would just go anyway (ofc she would bc her parents do whatever she wants in fear of her having a tantrum). no matter how much i tried to explain that i cant change my mums mind, and that if i walk the 30 minutes to hers and then walk with her back to where i was dropped then 1. thats over an hour i have to walk for with my big overnight bag which i dont rlly wanna do, and 2. we will be late because im getting dropped when the sleepover starts.

she also brought up the fact that im often late to her, and said i shouldnt cancel the night before but i messaged her in the morning and she didnt reply, and also i only found out my mum would take me today so theres nothing i can do???

she tried to excuse it by saying shes frustrated that i cant go, and i told her thats not an excuse to suggest its my fault or to say im making excuses, and she left me on read.

shes such a bitch i cant wait to go to college and never have to see her again shes so self absorbed.

i get that its annoying, dont you think im fucking annoyed and i have to live it. and i havent even listed all the issues in this post. she only cares about how my life effects her, and never once has she checked if im ok despite me saying im stressed. i get shes not obligated to check on me, but she constantly goes on about how she loves me and she really doesnt act like it. even friends that i barely talk to have checked in on me after hearing about my home life.

i rlly do like her, and we could be so close if she was just less self absorbed. i cant bring myself to see her as a real friend, because she cant accept a giant part of my life and it really fucking hurts.

she makes me feel like im a terrible person, but theres nothing i can do to fix it. i fucking wish my life was more normal but its not and it never will be so highlighting that its not normal does nothing but make me feel like shit.

#im fucking pissed off #sh recovery #i wanna cvt #sh vent #vent #sh #cvtblr #988blr #self h@rm #vent post #vent blog #venting

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doodle17 · 1 year

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Did you ever say the story on Raz proposing to lili? If you haven’t, can you tell it

OMG I HAVENT YET ABSLSJSKSBKS

Part of the reason I guess, is I kind of wanted to get an ask like this for it actually lol. Cause at the time, I felt like I was post to much Raz 'n Lili stuff so I took a break. So I guess I'll tell it here now!

Basically, Raz was technically still on Camp Councelor duty, but it was late at night, most of the campers were asleep, so he invited Lili over to hang out. (At least that's what she thought 👀)

The two just quietly wondered around the camp, talking about all the summers they spent there, and when they first met. To which Lili started calling him "tree sitter" jokingly for most of the night. Although she did get suspicious of Raz, wondering why he was suddenly feeling so nostalgic.

"Just thought it'd be fun to do while we're here." He'd keep saying, which irritated her a bit, because she was 99% sure this was an elaborate scheme to prank her. So she just shrugged it off. She could just beat him up for it after, anyways.

Later that night, the two sat together on the docks by the lake, which made Raz bring up the asylum.

"Oh, yeah. I remember that place." Lili said looking up thoughtfully. "Shame it's off limits now, huh?"

"Yeah, heh. Remember what happened there?" He asked her.

"HA, Yeah. You got ambushed with sneezing powder and blew your brains out."

"And...?" He asked expectantly.

"And.... what?" She said bluntly.

Raz looked surprised and laughed nervously.

"It's also where we had our first kiss? Don't you remember?"

Lili did, in fact, remember. She rested chin on her knee longingly.

"Of course I remember, jerk! It was only one of the happiest moments of my life!"

Raz laughed, putting an arm around Lili.

"Don't get to sappy on me just yet Agent Zanotto! I still have one more question to ask you." You could tell from his voice he was obviously trying to hide a smile. Lili sighed heavily and turned to face him. "Alright, what is it?"

Raz was trying his best to hide his excitement, but he couldn't help but have the biggest grin on his face. He propped on leg on the dock, and let the other dangle over the water. He took her hand and let out a deep breath.

"Agent Lili Martindale Zanotto," He began. "What the hell-" Lili whispered, as she was struck with a sudden realization.

"You, who have gone on countless missions with me, saved my ass way to many times to count, and has dealt with my crazy family for many years..." He laughed to himself a bit, before clearing his throat and resuming his serious speech.

"Anyways, I know that this probably isn't exactly the place you would want me to ask you this, and I know for a fact you're probably going to kick my ass for it, but..." He wasn't even trying to hide his smile this time.

"Agent Lili, would you be willing to spend the rest of your life as my forever partner? Will you become Agent Lili 'Aquato'?" He looked to her expectedly, with a slight smile on his face.

She stared at him. She looked frozen, her eyes wide and her mouth agape. Raz furrowed his brow.

"Lili?... Are you alrig-"

"YES" She interrupted.

"Like- Yes you're alright or-"

"YES I'LL MARRY YOU!" She proceeded to tackle him, knocking the wind out of Raz.

"HOLY SHIT- LILI-"

They both ended up falling in the lake lol. And waking up a few campers and Coach so that was fun. But Yeah! That's the storyyy 😬👍

Im probably gonna draw some of the scenes eventually if I feel like it, but for now, here's the proposal story :)

#Doodles rants #Psychonauts #Psychonauts 2 #razputin aquato #lili zanotto #Razili #psychonauts razputin #psychonauts lili

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thehandwixard · 11 months

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all your tim drake posting lately reminded me of a line from a review of 90s/2000s batman i read a long time ago. "tim drake is the only time batman needed robin more than robin needed batman". do you agree with that take, or have any nuance to add to it?

oh i absolutely agree with that take, though im not sure robin.. ever needed batman more than batman needed robin? i think they definitely needed eachother equally, but tim is an.. hes a case

i was gonna say a lot about the robin mythos i havent quite synthesized yet but ill send a couple pages with commentary instead

A Lonely Place of Dying

the thing about tim is that he becomes robin with shit to lose, unlike known orphans dick and jason who are literally dependant on bruce legally (ward and adopted son) and he isn't really.. bruce's problem cause of this but tim knows that batman needs him. i do generally see tim as being cognizant of the metatextual in some way but the important thing is is that he has been having knight terrors and visions of batman and dick grayson his entire life and knows everything about them. he didnt even initially want to be robin, he basically has no stake in this venture but steps in anyways because he does emotionally. he knows bruce will die of 30 gunshot wounds because of the grief over his lost son was making him not think about what was happening. bruce has an obsession with family the same he does with (gestures vaguely) and even if tim is plainly saying like. im not your surrogate son i will be this symbol though it. well. fate has a funny trick in place for him (mother is killed and father is indefinitely hospitalized)

its why he and alfred click so instantly and so well tbh, they both have this role of being definitely *dependant* on batman to exist and emotionally in the way batman can even be.. indirect emotional support. spiritual support? but they know he relies on them deeply to keep going at any rate.

i think tim feels he owes batman and robin, hes deathly afraid to disappoint bruce to the point that in life or death situations hes afraid not of his own demise but of disappointing him. like.. he knows bruce would probably blame himself deeply if tim died 'under his watch' and treats that as failing him. which is.. a LOT but very different than just dependancy

but batman and robin always needed eachother, and thats gonna happen to tim the hard way eventually

and obvi this isnt even getting into the robins post-tim which are

steph: not a son figure to bruce

damian: actual son

we are robin: a youth movement that were deliberately defined by batman's absence

not to mention that bruce starts getting a lot more people to pick up the slack over time and keep him in line because he cares about keeping himself safe for all their sakes. and also his awesome daughter cass

#dc #sorry if this doesnt scan at all !!!!! its a subject i feel very strongly about #and tim and bruce's relationship is so fascinating

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cannibalise · 5 months

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little late bt i got tagged by @guymeats and didnt know if i was too shy to post/do it bt whatever. havent made an actual post on here in wht feels like years lol

last song i listened to - this rn nelward - fashion

currently watching - nothing. not rly a watcher. ill say what im reading though. still halfway thru devourer (anrakyr novella(?)) and wondering whether i should just go ahead and start some heavier philosophy stuff ive been recommended by friends... tossup between philosophy of horror (thacker) or varieties of religious experience (james)

sweet/savory/spicy - sweet > spicy > savoury. i like all 3

relationship status - irrelevant

current obsession - ...funger.... and necrons. completely consumed by funger rn... i wake up in the morning and before i even open my eyes my first thoughts are how to streamline/optimise my route or some harebrained lore theory. ive seen endings A, B, D, E and im practicing runs on terror+starvation to get used to the different layouts nd difficulty differences. which has also made me so curious abt doing rag's personal ending... id like to try. current goals are ending C and enki's personal ending (S ending? idk i havent looked anything up at all, my sisters been telling me stuff cz i dont want to be even a little bit spoiled. which is also why i havent posted new art in a week or so. lots of funger stuff on my twt but im waiting til i cant be spoiled in the tags of my art. i recognise even posting this is a risk but...) it completely reinvigorated my desire+motivation to make art and not churn out the same boring shit over and over and to actually let myself indulge in. uhh. disgusting things. without worrying so much abt ppls reactions since im only rly friends w other freaks anyway

tagging... idk @gaast @skullhazard @gargoylegirlcock @monster-aligned @penultimania @fainlin @vikjayce @aesolerin @freelancerwizard whatever other mutual wants to do it if they wanna...

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radianceofelectra · 1 year

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sorry i havent been posting that much on this acc all the sketch art ive been doing lately is idk the word, risque? not sexual but idk i feel like i would be judged for it. ive also written some minifics that im also scared ill be judged for idk. and idk why im trying to sanitize my silly acc but this acc has like 100 followers now and that too many for the shit i draw lol. anyway expect more art and ill try to stop being so embarassed

#kevin says shit

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tv-gh0st · 1 year

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Day 1- But now this room is spinning while im just trying to fill in the gaps

Day 1- "But now this room is spinning while im jus trying to fill in all the gaps" (726 words) by Prime_Path Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: The Legend of Zelda & Related Fandoms Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Relationships: Four & Legend (Linked Universe) Characters: Legend - Character, Four Additional Tags: Sickfic, Linked Universe (Legend of Zelda), Four (Linked Universe)-centric, Wumptober, Is that not a tag?, Damn, Legend is a good big brother, or atlest hes trying to be, im pissed that isnt a tag, i will make that a tag with my own bare hands if i have yo, Four (Linked Universe) Needs a Hug, Legend (Linked Universe) Needs a Hug, Everyone Needs A Hug Series: Part 1 of Wumptober 2023 Summary: Four is just having a bad day, and Legend is trying his best to help he swears. Wumpee- Four, kinda Legend Characters- Four, Legen

today was a doosy, im posting this technically on october 2nd yes but the fic was posted on 11:59 pm so it counts

now why is this so horribly done and posted so late, because although ive started almost all the prompts already i technically havent finished them all(im not gonna be ad bad as today i swear) and i had really bad writers block on todays the today came around and its all shit

anyways thats my rant you can actually ready the fic now ig

Everyone was cold wet tired hungry and you know one or two of them would be sick(they couldn’t sleep out unless they all wanted to get sick), and it seemed like a miracle when a portal opened up, bad news they got thrown into Wilds goddessdamned Gerudo dessert. And it was fucking cold.

Atlest they could make a fire now.

But that really didn’t matter right now, because the moment Four walked through that portal he passed out, the last thing he heard was Legends squeaky noise as he was suddenly on 'make sure Four doesn’t die' duty.

The next time Four woke up he was very disappointed to find out they were still in the dessert. Apparently they got fucking split up And Four got really sick from the rain from the last Hyrule. He also felt very very fuzzy when he woke up. His head was pounding and he could barly hear anything his vison had black all around it and whatever wasn’t black spots was blurry as fuck. The thing that bothered him the most was how loud it was, he couldn’t hear anything yet everything was so loud in his head.

"F-r -OUR!"

"R-red?"

"ye- m- tuic red"

Four couldn’t hear a word of that so he just squinted at Red? Well he tried but the need to close his eyes won and Four effectively passed out, the last thing he hears being a grunt of some kind.

The next time he wakes up Four feels every so slightly more lucid, he can even hear again(the static in his head is sounding more and more like fighting by the minute) everythings still hot and blurry but he soon feels a wet towl? On his face.

"Hmm"

"Four!"

Said boy tilts his head, that’s not red is it? Maybe it is. No.

"thank godesses your finally awake." Legend? He thinks that’s who it is.

"yes im Legend."

Oh hes talking outloud.

"mhm"

"Come on you have to eat something, which means you have to sit up, I only have rations and ingredients but its better then nothing." as he said that Legend was helping him sit up, well Legend was kinda just doing it all but Four aprecieted it a lot actually, as he had to get helped eating the tastless jerky that the captain hands out for rations.

And that’s were they were now, Four getting basiclly fed and he just felt horible and the arguing got louder in his head and it felt like it just kept getting louder and louder and louder until.

"SHUT UP"

Hed barly been awake for 10 minutes and he couldn’t take it anymore he just wanted to go back to sleep and wake up in a nice cool inn where they had food and water and were his brothers were with them.

"-our Link?"

Oh yeah legend, fuck legend. Hed yelled, it wasn’t ment at him everythings just so loud and everythings spinning and he just wants everything it shut up shut up shutup shutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutup.

"link!"

He felt heavy presence of Legends hands on his shoulders and everything else stopped.

Legend sighed.

Besides that it was silent

"m sorry…"

Legend just looked at Four in a way that screamed, confused, a little mortified even, sad, and angry but not at him Four hoped atlest.

He really looked like that little kid who was trembling in his tiny boots thinking he didn’t need Elzo while he was really listening for Elzos every word.

He really did think Elzo was just a saftey net didn’t he.

"no- god no Four fuck uhm. Your sick im sorry I know somethings happening its loud er like in your head right? Im ausuming the mutturing you’ve been doing was them right? The uhm I don’t know what you call em."

What?

Wait.

Did Legend know?

"How-"

"I sorry I didn’t say anything I- your like uhg I cant do this now im sorry I Shouldn’t have said anything I just, I get it well I don’t but it- your sick and it cant be easy I just im not mad or anything okay"

Four sighed, hed deal with the fact legend knows later, and the fact that the yelling is still promanint hes tired and everythings still spinning, and well hes happy that legend isnt mad? He supposes"

#wumptober2023 #linked universe #fanfic

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kaleidosouls · 1 year

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hi. (pulls out uke)

IM JOKING but i havent posted here in forever huh, are ppl still around? i guess ill comment on like, whats been going in in the time i havent posted

so a long time ago now i wanted to like, cut off from twitter, so i deleted the kaleidosouls twitter, and wanted to keep my art stuff just on insta mostly, trying to move since twitter is a sinking ship right. then my instagram got deleted for no reason (and so did my pinterest that was ful of refs and honestly that was more upseting than insta getting deletedand losing all my art following)

ive been mildly caught up in IRL/college stuff in the meantime,having da depression, and the exec dysfunction same as awlays like. not much has actually been happening but ive been going acutally all over the place trying to figure out what im gonna do with my internet social media stuff. im looking into internships (other field) and im like, i havent given up being an artist professionally exactly but i think im like fuck it. fuck this like, building my Internet career or whatever. like, im gona wokr on my art portfolio and try to find art job stuf thats not really about how popular my art is on twitter or smth. none of that shit rly matters anymoer. same w here, i probably wouldve delted this tumblr if it wasnt the main like, blog so all my other blogs dpened on this one right.

im not like, done posting art online but ive been changing how im going about it and i still havent found my like, place yet. i did remake instagram, a main one and one for creature/pokemon stuff. idk im figuring out my life but i guess the main point is that its all a mess, and its not a disaster like things are going bad or anythin just that ive been in this inertia of disorder for a long time. im getting old. really tired lately, barely draw that much

i still rly love and am holding onto my personal ideas/projects that i want to execute oveer time altho they cant be a priority rn becuase of stuff in life. i got a really bad attention span so ill probably like, work on smth a lot for a few ays and then pick it up again in a year or more. the SU stuff is one of those. i actually ammaking this post bc i got really fucking dickhead comments and i was thinking of going off but my social media paranoia PR brain is like weighting on how i cant do that bc itll make my brand look bad and immature, and its like exhausting to live like that yk. altho it Is wise to restrain myself from being mean dsgkj but i also think itd be funny to cuss ppl off so :( life is very hard as an adult!

anyway point is. thigns are a mess rn and they will continue to be for the time being. my accoutns got obliterated so if you wanna keep up with me maybe follow my instagram if you want, i keep forgetting tumblr exists so tahst why i post so little on here. i do like postingt here though, nad i like making little blogs. i like ppls tags on ym art and replies. even the pricky ones like, i get to engage my brain a litlte bit adn its like ppl are out there yk? seieng my stuff, rather than just like, a bunch of numbers of how many likes or reblogs smth has.

most of the stuff left on this blog is for SU reclaimed and i still rly like the idea and its good coping for me and i want to pick it up sometimes but idk what to do with it wrt how i wanna present the content. ive considerd many times making a separate tumblr for it and i am considering that Again but maybe i should just quit it and post it here and forget about that. and find a different way to present the totality of the contents of the AU and use this tumblr as a way to just post it like, a 'devblog' (i am not developing SHIT this is just conceptual design writing stuff)

if theres anyone still following thats like engaged/interested in SU reclaimed feel free to comment with your thoughts or suggestions,i guess i could make an instagram for it? but ehh... idt thats how i wanna like, execute it. welp. i guess if i do make smth ill post about it here,i guess the point is that maybe i can try to post on here moreoften, idk, like i want my instagrams to be more tidy and like, impersonal. i deleted twitter bc i dont want to engage that personalyl at ALL anymore as an artist w viewers. not to mention it sinking. but i guess tumblr Is the perfect place to keep that unprofessional, slightly casual blogging artist experience. maybe if i get to cuss ppl out :D but then i dont wanna get harassed later over it. hm.. sucks to exist online tbh

thank u if youve read this far. if youre a mutual (somehow) or a long time follower and wanna know how to better keep up w me since i know im disappearing a lot feel free to dm

#personal #just how ive been/thougths/rambling

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