#anyway. idk where im going w this its just a thing i keep coming back to ever since i got that dx lmao

[voidimp]

probably couldve been diagnosed w hEDS a lot younger than twenty-fucking-eight if the foot doctor i went to in like middle/high school or my regular doctor had considered the possibility that the weak ligaments in my feet/ankles might be due to a connective tissue disorder that affects my whole fucking body instead of just being a localized thing

[juniestar]

My psych says I don’t like my mom or my ex because they make me vulnerable but I think it’s because they are/were both serial boundary violators. Well serial boundary violators sounds serious but I mean they are just good kind people who would not leave me alone when i ask(ed)

[mushyposts]

WOAH! THE CREW???? THE CREW FROM HIT FANFICTION NO THING DEFINES A MAN LIKE LOVE??? WOAH WOAH WOAH??? Anyway yes omg its them!!! This took me so long and im so tired but look at my ANGELS!

UM! Friendly reminder that I myself am not Inuit/Indigenous! I did research + had an Indigenous person helping me w the tattoos, but if theres anything wrong/disrespectful pls do let me know and I will fix it. All the tattoos r on a seperate layer so it'll be an easy fix and one i am more then happy to do. A few of the designs changed between this and my written description, so... Oops?? Especially Morqa. I got carried away ok.... ANYWAY I have some little notes abt their designs here and there so! Kaiqa: He used to have shorter bangs around his face but they annoyed him so he tried to let them grow out but that annoyed him so he would cut them again and then try to let them grow out and now he just has perpetual baby hairs that wont get any longer. Mikla: UM. Not much to say here. Isnt he pretty tho?? Buteq: SOMEHOW ENDED UP THE MOST MAJESTIC MAN EVER. HELLO?? The two beads on the right are for his nieces and the one on the left is for his sister! Neter: One time he got super cocky abt being 7 years older then Nitya which meant he was a better fighter and so Nitya was like "yeah?? ok bet." and then punched him and broke his nose and was like "hm where are those warrior reflexes?" so now Neter has a permanently bent nose. Sorqai: He got the scar thats through his beard in the same raid that cause Nitya and Konait (Kaiqas older brother) to die. Nitya died trying to get Konait and some other kids out of the mess, and Sorqai got injured trying to get to them to help. He's mostly numb on that side of his face due to nerve damage ! Causes him to lisp a bit, especially w the chipped tooth (which he got from tripping) Natai: He wears both his own and Nitya's necklaces their parents made them, and intends to only take of Nitya's and let it go into the ocean where he was buried when the war is over. His own way of keeping Nitya involved in the war effort, something that was really important to him. Kutai: Again, no real notes here but isnt he pretttyyy..... Kovak: Honestly, very likely one of my favourite character designs I've ever made. Im kind of obsessed with him. He doesnt wear his necklace from his parents because he wasnt on good terms with them at all while they were alive. He took it off before they died, and hasnt been able to bring himself to put it back on. he intends to give it to his kid when he gets back. Mori: UM! I dont have a lot of notes here. Mori has two kids ! Hence the three tattoos under their chin, I saw an inuit creator/source say that sometimes people will add lines as they have kids and I thought that was really lovely so yes!! Again im just. I think hes so pretty. Luqait: Im so sorry king I did u dirty posting this after that one chapter. Each one of the beads he wears is dedicated to someone he knew in the tribe who died, theres more not visible on the other side of the braids. I can say for 100% certainty theres one for Kya and Nitya. Saila: Saila was actually a design i struggled a lot with, but I think I got them to a point im happy with!!! They're a good amount intense, androgynous and also have that amber flash in their eyes. The amber comes from having Fire Nation somewhere in their ancestry, something I dont think will really come up in the fic, but a detail I think is good to know! Morqa: I changed Morqa's design the most, especially his hair! But I think he's ended up being a design I am most proud of. The piercings especially!! Eventually u will run out of space (that we can see ig??) king but today is not that day godbless.

OKAY! THERE WE GO... I HOPE EVERYONE LIKES THEM UM PLS BE NICE AND DONT REPOST AND IDK JUST.... I HOPE U LIKE THEM AS MUCH AS I DO i know oc's in fics arent always peoples favourites but the reception of these guys has been like. Beyond mindblowing. Im so fucking excvited and happy everytime people in my comments talk about how much they love the characters i've created. Like.... The fact that people enjoy the OC's and not just for what the give to Zuko, but for what they give to each other and their own individual stories is so incredible to me. I hope u guys like this and I hope it helps u visualise them better!! : D

[gingerjolover]

what about naomi and reader in a new years eve party and bumping into reader ex and them nomi get jealousy jealosy also love u gingy ♡

we're gonna hc this bitch if thats okay w you baby!

because listen ok, nomi "doesn't get jealous" (they do) they get "protective" (we let them think whatever helps them sleep at night)

there's a couple of different scenarios that i think would lend how naomi would act bumping into your ex

if you and naomi have been together for a loooong time and its some random ex that you dated in highschool or college, there might be a hint of jealousy

like they hug you a little too long or only look at you and not naomi, which naomi is like "it's just rude babe, im not jealous," their hand sticking in the back pocket of your jeans or rubbing the hem of your skirt as they pull you into them, leaning against a wall

if you haven't been dating that long, a more recent ex might trigger a diff reaction, naomi might get a little guard dog on them

like if they came up and hugged you and were just being really touchy and affectionate, naomi would be like "and I'm Naomi, THEIR PARTNER," and like shake their hand but have a killer grip

would also just be sooooo touchy all night, like nomi is already affectionate but when there's someone in the room that ALSO knows how hard you love and how deeply you can fall, nuh uh, not gonna fly for nomi

the only time i think naomi would be like not super jealous and even laugh a little at an attempt is if you're a bi/pan queenie or you've dated a man in the past and they come up to you like "wow you look so good, how have you been?" naomi is squaring UP BRO!

def pulls a "i can fuck you better than him, and you know it," and your jaw drops for a sec because "naomi quiet down!"

"babydoll im packing rn do i need to prove it to you?" they ask with a smirk, like leaning down and pressing searing kisses to your cheeks

it just so happens that said ex is watching from a corner, a drink in his hand

"I- well-..." you're stammering because naomi jealous is usually like ha ha and you guys joke about it and then it's done (bc your devotion to them and your relationship is obvious and naomi relishes in it and returns it with the same enthusiasm)

but naomi is cupping your cheek, running their fingers through your hair placing chaste kisses on your hairline being like "c'mon bunny let's go find an empty room before midnight."

NAOMI DEF WINKS AT THEM AS THEY'RE LEADING YOU UPSTAIRS IDK WHAT ANYONE SAYS

anyways...

i didn't do a full fic but i totally can if people are interested🫶🏻

edit!

i have to mention i think naomi's vibe at parties is similar to how i wrote them in the Halloween blurb where they take care of soft!gf

naomi is just always scanning the room and like they def have fun and party but they are always keeping an eye on you

which is why if they are w you when ex approaches its one thing

but naomi def DOES NOT like it when they are across the room and sees any of the above approach

maybe not so much the friendly ex

but the rest for sure naomi has an eye out because someone is moving in on their girl and they do not like that one bit

[the-s1lly-corner]

Caine and kinger x reader with ADHD

Caine and Kinger x reader w/ ADHD

yahoo!! gonna knock out some requests today !! this is gonna be based off of my own experiences btw !! not much else i can think to put in this authors note so! ill just get on with it note from the future, little longer than i intended but thats mostly because admin started relating TOO much wuh-oh

CAINE:

caine is honestly really good about keeping you on track when theres a task at hand. i dont know about you, but i tend to wander about when im working on something; to check on something else repeatedly then coming back to what needs to be done and just go back and forth.(shit im even doing it now, the getting up and checking on things thing even though i know the thing is fine/complete) i like to think that caine would be pretty okay at making sure you get the thing you need/want to do done! i dont think theres meds in the digital world, i mean yeah sure you can ask for them but since theyre digital theyre not going to actually. do anything. but lets say in a hypothetical au where this all takes place in the real world and caine is a real person, he would make sure you take them consistently and on time. honestly this hc isnt really part of the ask but; i generally like to think that caine likes to follow routines and schedules as closely as he can... maybe its the ringmaster thing since hes tasked with keeping everything running but... shrugs

very supportive when you make a small mistake in something (like this is just a general thing, though) and isnt too obnoxious with trying to hold or regain your attention is something happens to the side and steals it away. very patient and polite with it, i think

last minute addition because it hit me like a sack of bricks. time blindness. fucking time blindness. you know how i mentioned that caine is good at keeping you on track? i think he would be good with helping you out with that, at least some of it. mostly logging your activities and him keeping an eye on the time (which he already does so its not like an extra habit he needs to pick up.. though if it werent he would pick it up in a heartbeat. literally anything for you, he loves you a lot)

KINGER:

honestly he might start to mimic your stims and fidgets! he doesnt mean to mock you, no i just think he would start to reflect your actions after spending most of his time around you to make sure you're okay! while caine keeps you on track, kinger is likely to go with you when you wander off to check/do something else. really unless its something time sensitive or really important is when hes going to start outwardly reassuring you that the other thing is fine. honestly, in an au with the real world i was originally going to say he would have a chance of forgetting to help remind you/ask if you took your meds (if you take them) but i think he would take stuff like that way too seriously to even DARE forget. like yeah sure you're not going to d1e if you forget to take them for a single day but still. he'd probably be like this with any meds tbh, so if you're prone to forgetting youll be fine as long as you have kinger around! gibes you pillows for fidget stuff, if you are feeling restless. or perhaps even goes on a walk with you around the circus grounds. like idk about yall, or if this is something completely unrelated, but my legs HURT when i sit too still. like down to the bone, if i dont get up every now and then its agony; sleeping is hell and on days its worse than others (like im talking sometimes i need to be in near constant movement) (also jerky arms and legs) (anyways)

also very polite with returning your attention to where it needs to be but honestly given that kinger himself is shown to space out at least twice in the pilot i think sometimes you guys both get side tracked and struggle to remember and/or get back into the flow of what you were originally doing

ponders

tldr; caine keeps you more on track with schedules whereas kinger embraces your flow a little more but both are respectful of things and dont really make you feel less than + remind you to take care of yourself

[hypogryffin]

genuinely curious by what you mean by "jewish (factual)" in your tier list. i can assume for a couple what you mean (sophia as an example) but i dont see how the others could be like jewish-coded! interested in hearing your thoughts

link to the first post for claritys sake, but this is the tier in question:

ok so for clarification: i made the tier list a little while ago and then scheduled it for later to keep uploads consistent, something i usually do all the time but am not for this discussion for now. this means that by the day the tier list posted, i was already a few weeks or so divorced from the actual creation of it, so some of my opinions have changed (as i said in the og post, i was unsure on a good portion of the characters even when i first queued the list), and some of my reasonings behind placements have been lost to time and my silly little goldfish memory.

bc of this, as of now as im trying to find a distinct line between "jewish (factual)" and "jewish (based on vibes)", the criteria for "factual" is sort of murky. some placements in the category were serious, but a lot of them were also entirely for joking reasons, and i had moved on as soon as i was done laughing to myself without coming back to it.

all this is to say, i have no idea how to summarise it, so im going to explain everything i can remember about my thought process at the time so you can see where i was coming from.

SOPHIA:

yup 👍.

ok so for the uninformed, sophia is the name of a gnostic figure and the specifics change depending on the context of which ur referring to her in, but in judaism specifically sophia was given as a translated name for chokmah which is like a being thats like really important in kabbalah and considered like. this sort of i guess personification of divine wisdom?

anyways this is a concept that i doubt im anywhere near the first person to bring up, so im not gonna spend a lot of time on it like i will the things i havent heard other people talk about. like the whole "good friend of humanity" thing! judaism puts a lot of emphasis on kindness and care for other people and i think its important that thats so big for her character and for how jewish she can be read as. she is also jewish because i like her :^).

TATSUYA:

suffers endlessly because g-d hates *him*, specifically, and he hates g-d right back. jewish.

that was a joke. ok so right out the gate i think the whole "fighting hitler" aspect of IS should count for something during the discussion of which characters are jewish. like just putting that out there. anyways tatsuya is jewish because of eternal punishment. specifically, you know how hes like super into "atonement" and repentance? bro would really have benefited from going to a high holidays service lemme tell you. and he does it in a specific way thats like. his atonement is actively trying to repair what hes fixed right like hes not doing what hes doing to be redeemed, hes doing it because its his responsibility to fix whats been broken. i just idk how to explain it properly but thats a thought process your rabbi talks you through in jew school yknow?

also theres this thing called tikkun olam, which literally translates as "repairing the world". so it means more like. doing ur best as a citizen to improve community and country, or general social work. but just considering it as taking the literal translation, then its just like... yep. that sure is what hes doing isnt it

also, killed hitler. hashtag work

KATSUYA:

placed here mostly because being tatsuyas brother, theyd probably be at a similar "level" of religiosity. however there are some unique things i want to point out here;

katsuya like embodies the idea of "tzedek tzedek tirdof" like. its unfortunate hes a cop but for a cop hes a pretty good person? hes pretty uncompromising on right and wrong, and in a way that totally lines up w tzedek tzedek tirdof as its described in the torah.

extra emphasis on his compassion, as in theres like that core facet of judaism, the tikkun olam, where people have a moral obligation to help others; not just do good as oneself, but also stop other people from doing bad. that last bit doesnt really matter, cuz im bringing it up so i can talk about katsuya as a police officer to clear his dads name and try and ensure a better future for his brother. he gave up his dreams for them.

i mean, when i say "giving up his dreams", im kinda laughing to myself bc theres no way he ran it past his parents bc if he looked his jewish mother in the eye and said "i want to be a pastry chef" he would not make it out of the room alive. hed go "my dream is to become a pâtissier" and his mom would immediately be like "no its not its to be an accountant" and that would be the end of the discussion

also, i think he would make some of the best fucking challah in the world. hed make matzo ball soup that could make you jizz your pants just looking at it. look me in the eyes and tell me that he doesnt actually go nuts at rosh hashana when he gets to make the round challah with the raisins in it and stuff or whatever else. there is such a crystal clear vision in my mind of him rocking this apron my dad used to have that says "real men make latkes". it was pink and ugly as sin and i think it would be katsuyas most prized possession.

LABRYS:

her name is fucking labrys obviously shes a jewish lesbian. next.

/j i will actually talk about this. like not mentioning the only survivor of her upbringing, which isnt a one to one considering the death match portion of her backstory but still close enough to feel um. relavant to jewish culture. she acts very...stereotypically jewish?

its not entirely the accent, but it is...part of it. so like i know its like a new jersey accent and that the stereotype is new york, i guess? but im not american and i dont rlly know the difference. they look close enough to each other on a map tho so i think it counts

but also shes like kinda confrontational in a way i specifically associate with jewish people or jewish characters? like not really bitchy but argumentative right, shes got this really sarcastic or mocking sense of humour. and girl kvetches with the best of them.

(also, side note: since i made the original list, i found out that the voice actress for aegis in p3 reload, dawn m bennett, is actually jewish! if i were to remake the tier list, aegis would be moved up from "vibes" to "factual" because of this. mentioning that here because of the sister thing :).)

JOKER:

kills g-d which is the jewish dream. this is a another joke.

someone in the replies of the tier list said something abt a possible reason being that he has an "abrahamic figure" as his ult. persona, which could be a good point if satanael was actually an abrahamic figure! but it is not. like ok im not a history guy but satanael is a name used in the 2nd book of enoch, which arguably could be part of jewish "canon" (i know this is actually the term for it but fandom has rotted my brain and it sounds terminally online to use it in terms of real life religiosity) but most rabbis agree it like is not, and theyre kind of who im listening to on this, and quick google search says even in christianity, enoch is debatable? idk

so like satanael isnt in the torah. and if anyone says "oh its just like another name for satan so technically--" shut up i know. satan isnt real in the torah either. ok like "satan" is used as a term, but not as like the specific dude that like rules hell. hes just like at most a specific dude who is not a devil/cast from heaven or whatever, but instead is a lawyer. more often its a concept, something representative of like the urge to go against g-ds will or a kosher life, this "evil inclination" which everyone is born possessing and grapples with when trying to be a good person. NOT THE SAME AS THE CHRISTIAN SATAN. WHICH IS WHAT P5 WAS GOING FOR. SATAN IN JUDAISM IS NOT A "super demon lord" or whatever they call it in the text of the game

satanael isnt an abrahamic figure and i dont think satan is either cuz its so different between religions and honestly i think calling things abrahamic religions, at least w the context i hear of it, is like kind of a misnomer or just kind of generally misleading cuz judaism christianity and islam are all so different and if were talking about this i think whoever invented the term judeochristian should eat a sheet of glass for it because whenever i hear those terms its very clear the person saying it means just christianity but theyre trying to be inclusive without actually putting the work in and thats not the point of this.

ok if im honest, as i think abt it joker isnt like. really... super jewish, in a way that you can point out? its just like... this overall vibe im having trouble explaining which is probably also like super influenced by how much i like him. i want to say that this strict sense of right and wrong that remains uninfluenced by the rest of society is something that clearly creates or maybe just intensifies this like. empathy for other people that reminds me of this concept in judaism which i cant remember the hebrew name of rn but i think its most commonly translated to english as "lovingkindness", one word? or that the whole idea of the phantom thieves can be contributed to tikkun olam. but, on the other hand, even if lovingkindness is what i personally consider one of jokers core character traits, the other one is pure, blinding rage.

im not going to go super into it, because im a few years rusty of torah study bc its only really consistently done in my community for kids preparing for bnai mitzvah cuz of how few people we have in our congregation. but from what i remember, my interpretation of the exact limit between righteous and sinful anger is a bit more... lax than the average jew's, or at least the average rabbi's, meaning mine, lol. either way anger is almost always seen as sinful because its an emotion that can like. turn you from g-d, its the same thing that invokes that "evil inclination" we just talked abt. so, joker textually feels this rage that arsene, his other self, literally refers to as "sacrilegious", something that very clearly states that he is willing to *knowingly* commit sins for this rage and is perfectly capable of causing undue harm to others for it, which is exactly the reason why judaism warns of anger. this means jokers anger is distinctly against jewish teachings.

again, im really lax, my familys reform (/lh) and i think there are some parts of this characterisation that make me feel this rage is overall constructive, especially considering that is what feeds his constant practice of lovingkindness and tikkun olam, but it being such a huge facet of his personality (made worse bc as a silent protagonist, you really have to search to get away from this trait) brings him down on the Jew Scale(tm).

in short, now that im really discussing this id probably move him to incredibly jewish based on vibes or even to just "jewish" no further classification. but even w the undying sinful anger thing i cant not think of him as jewish and i dont think its just bc hes one of my favourite characters of all time.

also that hair texture looking really familiar is all🤔🤔. all im saying that is in the tutorial, instead of "frizzy hair", morgana deffo should have been calling them blondie and jewfro /j /j /j

EDIT AND JOKERS KITCHEN!! JOKERS KITCHEN!! FOOD AS A LOVE LANGUAGE!! IN P5 YOU MAKE FOOD FOR YOUR FRIENDS AND YOU PUT LOVE INTO IT

MORGANA:

i know i put morgana before joker in the tier but i think in order to rlly discuss morgana we needed joker first bc part of my reason for putting them in the same tier is because they really are a pair, do not separate.

anyways, morgana does have a lot of the same problems as joker when it comes to being difficult to pin down. his inclination to tikkun olam is similar, sort of even greater than jokers depending on personal characterisation of joker, but instead of this discrepancy of his jewishness being anger, the ethical conundrum with morgana is sort of. arrogance? like, i have trouble figuring out how to really put into words how i feel abt morganas "lovingkindness", because it is so hard to understand where hes at in terms of empathy?? like. fucking. idk hes definitely a very caring person but its not exactly like

ok i cant figure out how to say it moving on. i used the word arrogance even though i dont really think thats right, because morgana has never seemed haughty. his "arrogance" is really just him making up for an inferiority complex caused by the amnesia thing, its not as if he genuinely totally believes himself to be above the others. but like no matter what it stems from, the way he behaves and his personal pride hurts people. ie the okumura arc, or his entire relationship w ryuuji. he speaks ill of others, belittles them to bring himself up, etc. arrogance and excess pride is as condemned as anger in judaism if not moreso, since its even less useful/constructive to be "arrogant" than it is to be angry. OH ok so what i meant with the hard to figure out his empathy thing is this actually!! hes very caring and has a really notable respect for human life but its always at war with his need to prove himself, so even if when you think about it its like Oh Morgana Is A Really Caring Person, which makes sense because he was created from human desire and as such is really in touch with what people need, the desperation he has to be seen as "worthy" comes off as wanting to be seen as "above", even if it means trying to get the people around him as being considered "below" him.

tldr so if it was just those two traits i think id have to move morgana lower on the list, alongside joker.

HOWEVER. speaking directly to the other jews in the crowd, but morgana is totally textually a golem, right? like not exactly, obviously, but think about it. morganas a being of the velvet room because he was created from "the dregs of human hope" (canonical line from yaldaboath that i think about more than what can be considered healthy tbh), whose job is was and always will be to protect and guide the trickster and his community, the phantom thieves. hes a golem right? am i insane? am i seeing things? i dont care, im not giving up on this interpretation, so morgana is factually and canonically jewish cuz of it.

ZEN:

i do not remember.

as of today id probably move him to either jewish no other classification or not jewish. my b guys. anyways

JUN:

life is indescribable torment, and then hes also got additional, mostly unrelated, mommy issues. judaism 101.

also his suspenders when he was a kid are the most young jewish lad shit in the history of ever like i have seen that exact outfit on a young boy every time i go to temple, and each time it is a different kid

ok more seriously, i really do think juns story-- specifically his relationship with memory-- can easily be extracted into a jewish narrative. like nyarlathotep messed with his memories and convinced him that the other members of the masked circle killed maya right. and so the way he fanatically reminded himself of the past was a mix of trauma and active manipulation. but if i think abt it a certain way i also can see it as like. ok so in judaism memory is really important and like a lot of the time during for example passover, youre meant to refer to yourself as being a jew in egypt, saying "we" instead of "them" and such. but im specifically meaning how important memory/remembrance is in grieving. jun in his grief for mayas perceived death "kept her alive" in a way. she was never forgotten, and so she never died. even though the entire masked circle forgot, from trauma or fear or guilt or whatever, jun held on, remembering her, and so she survived. joker took peoples dreams but his actions also caused them to be completely be forgotten. they were alive, but they were robbed of their ability to be remembered at all, and so they were as good as dead even still breathing and talking.

retroactively, this idea enforces tatsuyas jewishness, considering the entire story of eternal punishment. he refused to forget the masked circle, even though it hurts.

anyways back to jun, i also think the whole repentance thing is important too. he hurt people in his anger and sorrow and spends the rest of his life (until the world is reset at least lol) atoning for his wrongdoings.

also, i know i said kid him is super jewish looking, but he has not gotten better as hes grown up. 17y.o him is exactly the guy your bubbe will pull up on facebook and be like "this is the grandson of my friend or whoever! you should go on a date with him, hes your age! he looks a bit gay but hes a very successful doctor! ...and hes JEWISH YAKNOW...." and ur like "ok bubbe"

ERIKO:

i actually do not recall exactly why she is in this tier specifically. the only thing i for sure remember was that i at least partially placed her here bc of her fascination with the occult.

HIKARI:

ok this one was kinda me goofing. its the whole extended family thing like whats more jewish than being actively discouraged from a creative career for something "safe" and "normal?" bro the aunt might as well have dropped the "being a doctor is very respectable" line in the song.

but like even without that, wanting to be a director or associated with film? hitting her with the jew beam. mazel tov babygirl.

[whumpshaped]

I just read your tiny whump academia drabble and 👁👁 boy oh boy do I love little guys being crushed very near to the point of death where they think their bones are bending but I also started thinking hey, i wouldn't continue to trust such a small and wiley pet in a shoebox even if he is a puny nerd, I think the only way to soothe my worries about an escaping little mouse is to make sure it cant move at all shehfh- Or put it in a cute little leash and harness like a domestic rat :3 specifically a retracting leash so you can yank him back with no effort, and it makes them easier to show off for some friends or benefactors~

OKAY UM. OKAY. LET ME GO INTO A WHOLE RANT ABT THE POISONED IVY TINY AU.

tw some nsfw talk, tiny whump, bullying, academia whump, dehumanisation

so idk if u know the context for the story, but bryce is basically blackmailing nate already. nate is being mercilessly bullied and exploited by him in private, while in public nate basically "joined bryce's friend group". bryce has some compromising photos of nate that hes holding over nate's head and basically forcing him to do all of his schoolwork instead of his own to ensure 1. he doesnt have to work much 2. nate cant keep up his own first place on the college leaderboard academically. bc bryce used to be outperformed by him in just this one aspect, and he thought hm... two birds, one stone

so yeah theres already an insane power dynamic going on when nate shrinks. and bryce is like holy fucking shit this is amazing. yes i'll have to go back to doing my own schoolwork but u know what i came to love even more than not working? bullying nate. and then another aspect of it is that..... how do i say this. turns out bryce has a kink for this sort of thing and now hes just horny. theres rly no better way to phrase this. hes not even gay but hes looking at tiny nate and hes suddenly very horny abt the prospect of this helpless little creature who also happens to be his ex academic rival who was already helpless- u get the picture. i wont go into detail but that has consequences. anyway bryce is obsessed w tiny nate. he also has immense cute aggression! hes restraining himself from crushing nate's tiny bones 24/7.

moving on, this also means bryce is incredibly possessive. he's not gonna show it off to anyone, because honestly he already reported nate missing and he doesnt need anyone trying to steal nate or whatever. what he does is he keeps nate in his pencilcase for a while until he can go out and get a little custom glass box with a detachable lid. its very nice <3 it has some padding at the bottom, tissues and cotton and cloth, whatever bryce could find. tiny food and water bowls are separate and never placed in the box, because controlling when and how nate eats and drinks is another aspect he enjoys a lot. the box is shoved in the closet whenever someone comes to visit.

that being said bryce looooooves to mess w nate, looooooves to mess with immobilising him completely w clear tape for example. very fun stuff. loves how exposed and vulnerable nate is. im sure he also makes little DIY harnesses and collars and stuff, basically just imagine him tying some thread or cloth around nate and yanking him around by it. dangling nate from high places it also fun bc he has a fear of heights. the closet is also fun in itself bc nate Also has a fear of the dark! and bugs. which leads bryce to pick up earthworms and shit and lock them in the glass box w nate. hes a menace and he loves tormenting nate so so much.

but at the end of the day bryce doesnt want to kill or seriously harm nate physically. if he threatens a knife or smth, he never rly goes thru w it. maybe the lightest little scrapes. but he mostly stays away from that. hes also afraid nate will one day turn back to normal and he doesnt want a full sized nate running around without an arm or smth. (he does eventually turn back btw but by that point hes so afraid and so conditioned and bryce has told him so much abt how everyone has moved on that hes just like...... ok. i guess i only have u bryce. sure i'll stay in the closet all the time hidden away until you graduate and can take me with you to your cool new house. its ok i'll stay soulless and very obedient as always.)

bryce treats nate like a toy, and nate never gets over it. nate already felt quite dehumanised and humiliated and small and powerless when he was normal sized. going thru that ordeal being tiny and violated and hurt in so many ways just cements it in. he feels like property, he feels like a toy, he feels like he doesnt have a life outside of being bryce's thing. and he rly doesnt. whenever bryce isnt playing w him, hes locked away in a dark place that makes him feel afraid and claustrophobic and honestly as horrible as bryce is, he doesnt have any other sort of life than the hours bryce spends actively teasing and bullying him.

[berryunho]

on seonghwa

this is just 800 words of me rambling about seonghwa (and a little hongjoong) in the answer so feel free to ignore or read for a glimpse into his noggin but there are... minor ??? spoilers lol i don't really think they're spoilers which is why im fine sharing them but ANYWAYS yeah beware ig ...

and shoutout bffie @mintsang this is for you don't yell at me when you read it <333333

ANYWAYS:

listen. seonghwa is so devoted to hongjoong because he feels responsible for him. when they first met seonghwa thought hongjoong was just some poor kid being beat by his parents and he decided that he would make sure that hongjoong didn’t die or go to jail or flunk out of school as long as they were friends. and at first of course hongjoong was quite… tame… w his personality shall we say so seonghwa really had no idea what the fuck he was getting into w him. and anyways by the time he put two and two together and realized that, ‘oh, maybe hongjoong is the problem!’ it was waaaayyyyy too late. like… he feels almost responsible for everything getting out of hand bc he definitely could’ve stopped him at some point but didn’t because he couldn’t bear hongjoong telling him to go or not wanting him at his side anymore so he just kept his mouth shut even as things got worse and worse. 

like seonghwa was a very normal and rational person before hongjoong got his talons into him. and this still haunts him. seonghwa really does mourn the loss of his innocence but… at the same time… he wouldn’t go back to change anything if he could. because he loves hongjoong. even knowing that hongjoong has only ever used him for his own gain and even knowing that hongjoong is like a textbook abuser he can’t make himself regret anything that he’s ever done for him. because he will always remember what it felt like to be that 14 year old boy watching his friend be rejected by everyone else and the feeling that he was the only one that could care enough to stay w him. and seonghwa knows its stupid but he’s scared that one day everything will fall apart for hongjoong and if he’s not there for it hongjoong simply won’t survive. 

so even though he knows hongjoong only wants him for selfish reasons he’s okay w that so long as hongjoong wants him somehow. and this is where our dear mc comes in. on one hand seonghwa is obviously jealous that hongjoong suddenly has someone else to give his freaky ass microscopic focus to. and on the other he’s pissed that she won’t just give hongjoong want he wants (even if what hongjoong wants is the opposite of what he wants). and on the other he’s scared FOR her bc no matter how strong she seems he’s sure that she’ll break to him eventually and seonghwa really doesn’t want to see what happened to himself happen again in another person. and on the other (4 hands is the normal amount idk what you’re talking about) he’s confusingly into her and he can’t understand why or how but he suspects its the fact that she’s also being subjected to the same. essentially torture. that is hongjoong’s desire/manipulation/whatever and he feels oddly connected to her…

so i wouldn’t say seonghwa hates mc nor does he really care about her he just is very conflicted about her and doesn’t know whether to be cold for his own sake or if he should be trying to get closer w her because this is really his first opportunity to have someone that understands hongjoong with him.

and anyways yeah even if seonghwa wanted to leave (he doesn’t) he wouldn’t because he feels responsible for hongjoong’s wellbeing (even though he knows this is foolish). and yeah maybe this is a bombshell or whatever but seonghwa couldn’t care less about the cult shit he’s just happy that hongjoong is happy and safe and not out in the real world wreaking havoc where he could get his ass caught a million times faster. so seonghwa deals with it to keep the situation somewhat under control for hongjoong’s sake. and while he’s not a fan of the crimes and the murder he also doesn’t particularly care either because he would do anything to keep hongjoong safe and he already thinks of himself as a lost cause anyhow. 

and this might be bold but here’s a little something on hongjoong too. hongjoong… is attached to seonghwa shall we say. like he never meant to be and he hates that he cares even a little bit so he keeps that shit on LOCK. as we’ve discussed he doesn’t love seonghwa bc he straight up cannot but if seonghwa decided to pack his shit and leave hongjoong WOULD be affected and he’d try to stop him duh but would he actually be able to kill him. probably not. so ANYWAYS hongjoong is a freak about mc for so many reasons but part of it is that he’s horrified (more so pissed) by the fact that he suddenly cares about someone and is desperate to prove to himself that he can control someone at a personal level without getting attached to them. which. we’ll see. LOL

SO YEAH THAT’S SEONGHWA! i could probably write an entire ass prequel about hongjoong and seonghwa and damn maybe i will but lol a lot of this will be clarified/expanded on in interims in the future but i litcherally cannot stop thinking about this rn so TAKE IT !!

[batsplat]

(reading your favorite riders post) it’s crazy how marc Gets To You. i care too much about him being safe and succeeding like at some point i started watching the races doing His rituals with the crossed fingers/flicking away its so stupid… but im helping him

tbfffff I have to say I have done dumber stuff for non-marc athletes... here's one - at a certain point last year I made desperate promises to the universe that I would *check notes* send a voice note of myself singing the american national anthem if only we could get this W. which I ended up doing at three in the morning my time, so that's still a recording that exists on my friend's phone. if we'd gotten the follow up win in the final I would've learned how to play the anthem on the piano too and sung along like it was so serious... it had never been so serious... obviously as ever it ended in tears so I was safe on that count. luckily since then I've been sufficiently traumatised that I'm over it and no longer have any genuine feelings over sports. I'm free

anyway with marc at least it's kinda? he's won so much that y'know the results aren't life or death for me, everyone already knows how good he is, especially in a year where realistically he's not reallyyyy in the title fight p4 or p6 isn't life changing for me. I do however worry about him a lot... honestly always been the worst thing about him, like the writing was on the wall with him for years before 2020. that's the difference with watching motogp right,, like in other sports I follow that aren't anywhere close to dangerous, at least I'm not getting that sick feeling of 'oh god you're going to keep coming back for more, you're going to keep hurting yourself'. last year wasn't fun!! on any count, up and down the grid! kind of a different type of worrying... until assen we'd had such a blessed injury free stretch during races this year, it had receded a little bit. worst thing about following this sport by far

but anon extremely valid on doing the rituals too!! doing weird stuff on behalf of athletes you like is a very good and real way to spend your time. that being said! on that topic! I would just like to say those little marc rituals are sensible and good!! idk maybe this is just my own sporting background but it's super common to have that type of habit not just because you're appealing to some higher powers of the sporting pantheon or whatever (though a lot of the time it is that too, athletes ARE freaks) but also because it's Good to have repetitive little habits. it's like mental hygiene, just something to basically put yourself in the same mindset every time before you're competing. so much of sports is about tricking your brain to be in The Zone when you need it to be in The Zone, so just having an actual physical movement to like... flick the switch... is good and normal! I will defend his weird bad thoughts flicking hand motions to the death - it's not just about being a weirdo, it's about linking a little physical motion to the act of disciplining your brain

[chuuyascumsock]

hey snookums 😋

how are you? i hope youre being the baddest bitch that ever bitched out there. i know you're definitely an amazing person to interact w :D

i know i said that burnout was gone but like... summer blues, i dont know- does anyone else get that? T-T

BUT i'm going to try coming back more bc i miss you and my other moots :')

im trying to write things OTHER than comfort but like... idk how.

Anygays, i love the small drabbles you've been doing!! they're healing my soul fr. and i remember the first drabble of yours that made me in absolute awe of you my dear.

IT WAS THE MECHANIC! CHUUYA ONE- GENUINELY ITS SUCH A MASTERPIECE AND DROVE ME CRAZY 🥰

so thats when i started religiously becoming your #1 fan def.

(also i kind of want to rant to someone but at the same time i dont bc its just random but also i dont want to put my stuff on anyone else you know? because everyone has their own stuff to deal with and it would be horrible to add onto anyone else's stuff)

im doing great (real)

sorry this was a dump kind of T-T i love interacting w you, makes me so happy knowing i get to interact w someone i respect and admire a lot!!!

with love

sugar tits

Hey Pookie <33

I’m doing pretty good, I’ve been writing Drabbles as of lately to keep the babes at bay as I work on my fics. I felt bad for not giving anyone anything to hold over on because I was working a bunch (which I got my hours fixed, but it burnt me out to the point I went nonverbal for awhile because I was so exhausted mentally interacting with customers all day— who don’t read the “be nice to our employees” signs btw so there’s some assholes for sure and I have to be nice even though I want to tell them to suck a dick 😭). But since I’m feeling a little better, I’m trying to give you guys something at least. (I also plan to draw a pride picture with my insert, Fem Chuuya, and Fem Dazai in honor of the lesbians because we love women 😩).

Anyways, if you’re having trouble wanting to write things, you could always brainstorm with me, I don’t mind. I find that I have a ton of ideas that I don’t put to use, so I wouldn’t mind sharing them and I’d love to see them in someone’s writing (only if you want to though <33).

Also, I loooove, love, love— when you guys like my writing at all, it really boosts how I feel about my own writing. I get scared to post something sometimes because I don’t think that it’s good enough for you guys, so it’s a relief when you guys do 🫶

If you need anyone to rant to, I’ll be here btw, the second thing I love most is hearing about people’s problems or getting to know all about them. If I wasn’t an art major, psychology was going to be my next pick and I would be a therapist. I only chose art major because interior designers make bank where I live and I like decorating, so :]

Thank you for the ramble, my dear, I hope you have a nice day ❤️

[meiko3323]

Father in her character demo be like:

ok im not by any means a lore theorizer, my brain is much too smooth for that, but every now and then, like a bouncing DVD logo touching a corner, i have a coherent thought. and Arlecchinos demo sparked some which id like to put forth. making it as a text post cuz archons know, i get real wordsy ^^'

spoilers obv if youre not far enough in story.

🔥

🔥

🔥

now. upon several rewatches of the original and reactions, the first non-Arle voiceline jumped out at me:

"A spark cannot shatter all shadows until it sets all ablaze or else to the other end of light lie still bleak shades"

this made me think back to was it Childes or Wanderers voiceline? where they say that given the chance, the Knave would betray the Harbingers if it suited her. so what if, hear me out, in her quest of retribution she seeks to somehow go against the Fatui/ Harbingers/ Tsaritsa? retribution that is, for the myriad suffering theyve caused to innocent ppl around teyvat. idk abt full on taking them down, as the top 3 harbs are said to have power that rivals archons, but mb put a sizeable dent in their forces, or otherwise impede their plans. she also heavily implied a wish to collaborate w us, the Traveller, in the future at several occasions during the Fontaine AQ. mb she wants to enlist our help in her goal. circling back to that line, i think the spark is obv Father, and the shadows she wishes to shatter i strongly believe are the Fatui/ Harbingers. and unlike me, the line after is confidently saying "set ALL ablaze" = complete eradication of that organization.

my next thought was actually aided by a yt comment under one of the recent vids w her (idr if teaser, demo, or short, likely short) that said sth along the lines of "shes not a wolf in sheeps clothing, shes a sheep in wolfs clothing, forced to blend in w the wolves that took her in". this comment popped into my mind as i watched the scene where she is walking in mb some type of dream or mind world, w numerous children running around, playing and singing. and she has such a soft look on her face as she gazes at them. but then she collects herself w her signature 🤫 to flip the switch to ig we can call it her wolf side, and the scene changes to her against the red eclipse moon thing (crimson moon?). where was i going w this?.. i think the fact that her "natural" or innermost state is her sheep side where she just wishes to run the orphanage in peace and be a good mother Father to the children and she has to actively suppress that and channel her wolf side in order to carry out her version of justice, and ofc keep blending in w her adoptive wolves (harbingers) until the time is right.

finally, her last voiceline of the demo struck me as very crucial:

"I hear that the children love to play by the fireplace, so let us continue to use the name, "House of the Hearth". Still... its flame is no longer needed for you have the strength to defend yourselves"

from what i can unpack, this is obv talking abt her leaving her position as orphanage director and passing that torch (heh) to Lyney. which btw goes in line w a theory proposed by ABD Illustrates on yt regarding pyro characters (and jumping off to predict plot of Natlan). ill link it btw, go give it a watch, its very insightful:

anyway. she wants the orphanage to keep its name after her retirement. she feels that the children no longer need her (its flame) as under Lyneys leadership they can fend for themselves. a sad look comes across her face as she says this. i believe shes not as unfeeling/ uncaring and is more attached to the children than she dares to admit, and is pained to leave them behind in pursuit of her greater goals.

oh and going back to the 4.6 patch trailer, the boss battle bw her and her main trio of children - despite her thinking Lyney is fit to take over, she wants to give him one final test ig to reaffirm her decision, and to give him the confidence boost to take up that post. cuz he is very unsure of himself, and is always anxious of disappointing Father and not living up to w/e expectations he believes she has for him.

omg that was a lot. this was prob a solid hour of pure stream of consciousness. hopefully theres some coherent nuggets in there. most of it isnt horribly deep, honestly prob surface level stuff that might be painfully obv to others. but i wanted to write it out nonetheless

i invite anyone that bothered to read these long-winded ramblings to respectfully share their thoughts/ theories in the comments and/ or reblogs. was there anything i missed or forgor?

thank you for your time ^^

ps: the trailer was phenomenal btw OMG - the cinematography, the music?! i cant wait for tnbee to make an epic remix of it. and ofc for real lore theorists to dig in and drop their videos on it o3o

[melancholiaenthroned]

BERNARD for the ask game >:)

HELPPP ok

first impression: ok i got into comics right around the time tim came out so my first impression was very much the general publics of "robin has a boyfriend!" i read the urban legends story about that first and thought it was fine! i liked it well enough. then bc it mentioned that bernard was a friend was high school i went back and read his original appearences and idk i just loved him... he was silly and he was posturing and nobody really liked him except tim LOL. his friendship and crush on darla was also rlly rlly sweet and i got rlly attached to the trio of them. i also rlly liked his og design w the longer hair and sunglasses. i thought the conspiracy theorist thing was rlly fun esp w how close hed get to the truth and tim would have to be like "what ur so crazy hahaha where would batman get MULTIPLE robins".

impression now: im gonna be honest my peak bernard phase was before tim drake robin started when i was really really excited to see more of this character id gotten attached to... erm. in a post tdr world ive kind of distanced myself from him bc he feels like an entirely different guy. which is fine! presumably hes aged and i wouldnt want to live like my high school self forever. that being said, the ways that he is the same feel a bit like a parody now. his conspiracies r way more outlandish and supernaturally based than they used to be, and they way theyve kind of written it so seems like he knew he was gay/bi back in highschool which doesnt rlly read as true to me having read those highschool appearances. hes just tims boyfriend, who knew he was gay before tim did and was just kind of waiting for him, i guess. i do like the chaos cult, i like that in the unspecified time away from tim his life was like. completely fucked. but now that tim is there it feels like hes just been flattened back out. the last few issues of tdr actually started focusing more on his issues specifically w his parents and the cult but. you know. cancelled.

favorite moment: he was so so scared to talk to darla he was like "losers like us cant talk to cool girls like her tim... shes friends with jocks" and then tim goes up to her and the jocks are all nice and polite normal guys and darlas like yeah u guys seem fun. and its just like. he was completely overreacting. like so much for his claims of being a social chameleon 😭 and then next issue darlas just a part of their group and theyre acting like theyve been best friends forever. i think for as much as he pretends to be like. a cool guy who doesnt care that he has no friends. its a rlly nice moment of showing that hes actually really anxious and self conscious and he wishes he could reach out to people but once he has the opportunity he latches on to ppl and doesnt let go. and i also rlly like when darla comes back and he finds out she has powers and his first reaction is like. my life sucks so bad can i come and be ur sidekick. like man:-( he was funny for it though! shoot ur shot

idea for a story: ok this is for a hypothetical "possible in comics" story and not like. a fic. so its not super bernard focused BUT they need to bring darla back now im not joking anymore where is she. idk what the status of shadowpact is post rebirth i dont think it exists anymore? but whatever. tim gets a case that leads him back to louis grieve where we can get a recap for ppl who didnt read or dont remember what happened back then. he can be like heres where i met bernard^_^ also the horrors. anyway the case has smth to do w the mob&darlas family and so he manages to get in contact w her and obviously shes like. i have no connection to that life anymore im not helping and i dont want to remember this. but reluctant team up👍 anyway bernard plays into this bc i think tim keeps it from him whats going on in the case bc he doesnt know that bernard was actually the first to know when darla came back and he doesnt want to upset him by bringing up old memories bc they Never talk about the shooting. and laura obviously isnt telling bernard bc she has no idea he and tim r dating so hes kept completely out of the loop and tim and darla/laura r NOT getting along. he keeps calling her darla and hes whinier than she remembers and theyre getting nowhere in the case bc they dont work very well together. i would also rlly want an issue where it goes over how each of them experienced the day of the shooting and there r small differences in each one to highlight how time has warped their memories and how theyre all a little unreliable. and each of them would be done by different artists 👍 anyway eventually bernard stumbles upon the case and hes pissed off at tim for keeping from him "darla was my friend too" you know. and smth he remembers about that day but the others dont (too caught up in the gang war/being robin) helps solve the case^_^ and hes able to help tim and laura get along again and they part on good terms w bernard and laura staying in touch. and at some point while he and tim r fighting he confronts tim for fucking off after the shooting and not reaching out to bernard until years later, and how bernard was completely left alone after one his best friends died and the other immediately moved away.

unpopular opinion: whyyyy does he want to be a chef its stupid sorry. emt or nurse bernard is the most important thing in the world to me i have no idea why they chose "chef" for his career path but it annoys me to no end. its another thing that just feels flat about his new character. like even if instead of being motivated by his history with unable to save darla from the shooting+the cult he was scared of wounds and violence and avoided it... why chef? idk itd be fun if he wanted to be like a radio host or smth that actually fit his personality. i think money should also be a bigger motivater for him bc he always read as like. upper middle class new money to me whos parents cut him off when he came out. like maybe if they showed him working as a line cook or an actual job i could understand him growing a passion for it but hes just like. a rich foodie. like what.

favorite relationship: he and tim i guess LOL who else does he have. him and darla for friendship and also i think it wouldve been cute if they had dated for a bit in highschool<3

favorite headcanon: i think he should be angrier at tim. for missing dates, for not telling him hes robin, for everything. hes too nice. or if theyre set on the nice thing i think it should be framed as him being a bit of a people pleaser/pushover post cult bc hes scared of tim leaving him and either way tim should have to address being kind of a shitty boyfriend. a nicer one is i think duke would be his favorite of tims siblings:-) hes not weird to bernard like i think the others would kind of be (shovel talk from dick would make me kms) and bernard never had any siblings so he kind of treats duke like a younger brother and tries to like, help duke with his homework, despite the fact that duke is definitely doing better in school than bernard did. i dont know if duke like. likes bernard but hell actually respond to his attempts at bonding unlike damian who has him blocked.

[quodekash]

i once again went to sleep instead of watching an episode but im here for the first vice versa episode now! (and depending on how im feeling, i might watch the second episode when it airs tonight, but no promises)

i love puentalay so much and THEYRE GONNA BE DADS and im also desperately hoping for some aoufuse because i love them so so much and their child who is a dog

aoufuse were parents before puentalay. they adopted a dog together. they beat you, puentalay. hah.

ANYWAY im gonna watch it now, wish me luck, ill probably cry

im also gonna try to not go over the 30 image limit again cos i keep doing that

i love how they put summaries at the start of these as though we havent aggressively rewatched each show in the week preceding the os2 episodes

OH NO IM ALREADY GONNA CRY AND THE ACTUAL EPISODE HASNT EVEN STARTED YET

talay singing happy birthday to puen? this feels familiar. except its actually puen's birthday this time. not pakorn/tun's.

"and as i wished for every year" HOW MANY YEARS HAS IT BEEN?????

NOOOO NOT THE DESIGN ON THE CAKE

WHY DOES THIS STUPID LITTLE DESIGN HAVE SUCH AN AFFECT ON ME

IM SOBBING

WAIT WHAT THE HELL WHERE'S TALAY???

WHAT DID THEY DO

WHY WOULD THEY START IT LIKE THAT

i know its gonna be fine, this is gonna be like entirely fluff for two episodes because CHILD and they look really happy in the preview

my prediction is this sadness will last three minutes at the most

but also WHYYYYY

honestly i love this acapella intro song

"Faded Pink?" WHY THE QUESTION MARK

PINK IS LOVE

WHY IS IT FADED

WHY IS THEIR LOVE FADED

AND AGAIN, WHY THE QUESTION MARK

IM SO CONFUSED

STUFF YOU

IDK WHO IM STUFF YOU-ING BUT ITS SOMEONE

"since weve come back to this universe" okAY, COOL, GOOD A SUMMARY

"it's already the fifth year" W H A T

WHAT THE HELL

THEYRE SO OLD

AND ALSO WHAT THE HELL

FIVE YEARS IS SUCH A LONG TIME???

ALSO WHAT WAS THE KID DOING FOR FIVE FREAKING YEARS

I HAVE SO MANY QUESTIONS ABOUT THIS KID

i know the questions will have answers probably very shortly

BUT THEY DONT HAVE ANSWERS RIGHT NOW AND THE KID IS CONFUSING ME THOROUGHLY

THAT MUCH COFFEE???

bro puen youre so tired. go to sleep. please.

altho i would like to point out the mug that says "the cat's favourite"

does that imply that they have a cat

please answer my questions

"i really want to drink the coffee made by you, talay" dude i know youre deeply in love with him but you need to stop drinking so much coffee and GO TO SLEEP FOR CRYING OUT LOUD

TALAY HAS A LITTLE WORK TENT IN THEIR BACKYARD??? THATS SO AWESOME WHAT THE HELL

"it's 9pm already???" is this adhd time blindness i am smelling

or perhaps an autism trait

HJRKDFHJBTF THE CHEEK KISSES

bro what is it with our skyy 2 and birthdays

THEM

I FORGOT THEIR NAMES

BUT I LOVE THEM

ALTERNATE UNIVERSE UP AND AOU

PREEDA AND AOU??

they literally havent said either of their names this entire time

1:27 IN THE MORNING???? JEEEEEEZ

THIS IS SOME KIND OF NEURODIVERGENT TIME BLINDNESS THING, FOR SURE

THIS IS NOT NEUROTYPICAL BEHAVIOUR

looking at talay's phone and im just now realising: how the hell did they unlock their phones in the other universe? they dont know tun and tess' passwords. how could they have gotten into their phones?

there are many things to do with the lore and logistics of the universes that dont make sense and we'll probably never get answers to, but its still fun to wonder and speculate

awwhhhhh poor puen feels unloved and forgotten

akk felt unloved and forgotten because aye had a surprise for him

talay is just neurodivergent and cant figure out time and so he genuinely did forget about it being puen's birthday

BUT NEITHER SITUATION IS BAD

in both situations there is still the love

now i wanna talk about neurodivergence for three hours and justify talay and stuff but i wont because i need to actually watch this episode before it gets too late

why are they being sad and angsty

theyre supposed to be happy and in love and fluffy

"so lets change from a birthday to a hug day" YES PLEASE

I LOVE HUGS

HUG DAY EVERY DAY

GIERKJBDGKJ HE SANG THE OTHER UNIVERSE HAPPY BIRTHDAY SONG

IM GONNA CRYYYYYY

honestly it rly does feel like its been that long since the show aired

its only been like one year

but it feels like five

but also feels like three months

time is weird i dont like thinking about time

lets stop talking about time

HES GETTING MORE AND MORE AUTISTIC AS THE EPISODE GOES ON

I LOVE HIM SO MUCH

i love the concept of hug day

just hug your loved one/s at any random point in the day because ITS HUG DAY

i mean you can also do that any day (as long as theyre fine with hugs ofc)

but i think the hug feels more special on hug day

now i want a hug day

why isnt hug day a thing everywhere

i feel like i could probably talk about hug day for hours

hug day is good

good. good good good. a man of fine taste.

unlike some people (MAITHEE) who DONT LIKE SPAGHETTI because its "too cheesy"????

THEN DONT FREAKING MAKE IT WITH CHEESE???

È SPAGHETTI

FORMAGGIO È NON NECESSARIO PER SPAGHETTI

PERCHÉ??? PERCHÉ SEI IL MODO CHE TU SEI???

mi dispiace, maithee not liking spaghetti because its too cheesy is a cause for anger in the minds of the little italians that live in my brain

anyway. spaghetti is good. its pasta. è un pasta meraviglioso

good job talay

HUG DAY IS MAKING ME SO HAPPY

I LOVE HUG DAY SO MUCH

HIS LITTLE POUT WHAT THE HELL THEYRE SO SOFT IM DYING

"day 2: flirting day" OH MY GOODNESS I NEED THIS

this is what i needed for soundwin after episode 9

anyway

BRO THIS IS THE MOST AUTISTIC FLIRTING IVE EVER SEEN??

huge props to this guy, damn

PUENS LITTLE STICKY NOTES FOR TALAY??? IM SOBBING THIS IS AMAZING

i love that puen's nickname for him is "Lay" its so sweet

this is incredible so far but i have one question: when the hell is the child introduced and also WHY and also HOW

FEEDING DAY??? BROOOOO

THE CHIPS

THE FREAKING CHIPS

HOLY HELL ITS THE CHIPS

IM GETTING INSANE FLASHBACKS

THEYRE BOUTA KISS

PLEASE KISS

come on bro, not again

why do you shower yourselves in chips

you did it with popcorn last time

and then you presumably had to clean it all up

now you have to clean up all the chips

why would you do that

why does he keep doing this

this is a really weird habit of his

puen, you confuse me

"confession day" why is that so funny

massage day, nice

KISSING DAY?? GIERJDBKG

OMG THE SONG

GJKBERDFGKHJ I LOVE THIS SONG

MEMORY DAY??? NOOOO THAT WOULD MAKE ME CRY

THE FREAKING PINK PASTRIES???? BRINGING THE TEARS IMMEDIATELY OH MY GOODNESS GRACIOUS GRAVY GUSTAV

NOOOO

NOW IM SOBBING EVEN HARDER

its the fact that "memory day" means to both of them the place they fell in love; the universe they dwelt together; the friends they made; the friends theyll never see again; the memories they created together; the lands where they wandered side by side, hand in hand, arm in arm, heart in heart.

im fine.

ooo going out day

THE FREAKING HELMET

IM NOT OKAY

I AM VERY NOT OKAY

HOLDING HANDS DAY???

"honk the horn if you want me to hug you" GHERIUJDFGHKREJBFN

theres too much fluff

too much fluff for my sad little heart

a buttload of fluff for the eclipse, and now a buttload of fluff for vice versa

hey google, how to deal with happiness

theyre so freaking cute what the hell

ooo day 30: surprise day

two things to say about that

1. aye apparently thought it was day 30 on akk's birthday

2. does this mean the child is gonna appear today? is this very un-subtle foreshadowing?

ah shoot puen is ✨choking✨

HES AN ACTOR

I FORGOT THAT HES AN ACTOR

HE WAS BEING OVERDRAMATIC

I HATE HIM SO MUCH

I LOVE HIM, BUT STUFF YOU PUEN YOURE SO DRAMATIC

FBOUARDHFGL THE BALLOONS AND THE PINK AND THE THING ON THE WALL AND GJRBDFNGJHRKBGD IM DYING AND CRYING AND FALLING OVER AND FALLING APART

i sense merch

WAIT OMG HE DREW TALAY IN THE WEIRD PICASSO STYLE?? TGJREIDGKN MATCHING PICASSO PORTRAITS IS SOULMATE BEHAVIOUR

OH ITS A WATCH

PROBABLY SO THAT TALAY CAN KEEP TRACK OF TIME SLIGHTLY BETTER

NRJFGBRHDBGF NEURODIVERGENCE

i love them

probably too much

theyre so sweet

OH I DIDNT EVEN NOTICE THAT

that rly shows how observant i am, doesnt it

"but i fell in love with you when you wore glasses" IM GONNA CRY ITS SO SWEET

im rly hoping someone has a full translation of the calendar because its a lovely idea

"thank you for joining me in doing this crazy stuff" bro if im right, its about to get a WHOLE LOT crazier. youre about to have a child.

puen's final surprise: "im pregnant"

DOORBELL

DUN DAHDAH DAAHHHHHH

CHILD.

oh no this child is cute

why must the child be cute

i hate children

its one of my defining personality traits

i despise children

(mostly)

(there are some exceptions)

why must i be immediately attached to the child

"is he another surprise from you" lmao yeah he just popped out a child for this specific day

NO BUT SERIOUSLY WHAT HAPPENED

WHY IS THE CHILD SUDDENLY THERE

IN THE RAIN

WITH A SUITCASE

ITS BEEN 5 YEARS

AND THEYVE NEVER SEEN THE KID

WHAT HAPPENED TO MAKE THE KID COME TO THEM

IS THE KID OKAY?

PROBABLY NOT, BUT WHY IS THE KID SMILING SO WIDELY??

THE KID IS SO HAPPY TO SEE PAPA

JIGSAW??? IS THAT THE KIDS NAME?? THAT'S AN INCREDIBLE NAME WHAT THE HELL

jigsaw and his four dads raising him

TUP

THAT'S THE NOT-UP GUY'S NAME

HELLO TUP

tup is also autistic i decided, and i love him

what if jigsaw is from the other universe.

its possible.

IEJRKDGN

WHY MUST I LIKE THE CHILD

IM SUPPOSED TO HATE CHILDREN

THIS IS DESTROYING MY REPUTATION

WELL NOW IM CRYING AGAIN

had to have dinner but im back

anyway WHAT THE HELL WHY MUST PUEN HAVE A SAD BACKSTORY ITS MAKING ME SAD

NOOOOOO

WHY AM I EMOTIONALLY ATTACHED TO THE CHILD

I HATE THIS FEELING

THIS FEELING OF KNOWING THAT I WOULD WILLINGLY DIE FOR THIS CHILD'S HAPPINESS AND WOULD DO ANYTHING FOR THIS CHILD TO JUST BE SAFE AND HAPPY

WHY MUST I FEEL THIS FEELING FOR A TINY HUMAN CHILD

I HATE IT

IM USED TO IT FOR CHARACTERS AND DOGS AND STUFF BUT WHY A CHILD

usually people are like "the feeling of responsibility for someone elses life" like its a good thing and im always like 'um no thanks i dont want to be responsible for that i can barely take care of myself' but now my brain is like LET ME BE RESPONSIBLE FOR THIS CHILD I WILL CARE FOR THIS CHILD AND DO EVERYTHING FOR THIS CHILD i hate this so much

i think its because the child's name is Jigsaw

its entirely bc of the funky name

"you bought a lot of stuff, so you're well-prepared" PUENS LITTLE SHRUG OMG

the shrug says 'what can i say, ive always wanted to be a dad but never wanted to tell you because i didnt know if you wanted that or not'

that could also not be the case, that is entirely possible

but the way puen's been acting since the child appeared makes me think hes either always wanted to be dad (or maybe wanted to be a dad since falling for talay) or the child awakened the dad-need inside him

omg i cant wait for puen's dad jokes

"i think jigsaw fits right into our lives, like a missing piece of us"

i swear if he doesnt say that at some point, im leaving

I KEEP INVOLUNTARILY MAKING NOISES

LIKE THE GOOD NOISES THAT I RESERVE FOR SWEET HAPPY MOMENTS THAT SHOCK ME A LITTLE BIT

kind of like an 'oh' mixed with an 'aw'

why is the oh-aw happening for the child

i dont like this feeling

HE BOUGHT COLOURING INS FOR JIGSAW?? BRO YOU WANNA BE A DAD SO FREAKING BAD WHAT THE HELL

they cant figure out whose kid it is. take the kid for a dna test you idiots

"does this mean jigsaw is my son? ...i dont have any savings. How am i gonna raise him???? i need to call my mum" BROOO HIS DAD INSTINCTS ARE KICKING IN AS WELL, I LOVE THIS

oh my goodness i think i might be dying

these scenes are too cute

theyre raising a child

theyre dads

and the child is DESPICABLY cute

THIS IS TERRIBLE WHY ARE THEY DOING THIS TO ME

FJEKBGSUEJB PUEN BEGGING TALAY TO FEED HIM I LOVE THEM SO MUCH

I LOVE THEM SO SO SO SO SO MUCH WHAT THE HELL

THEYRE SO FREAKING SWEET

side note: both of them have such pretty hair

"PAPA!" "YES?" "YES?" THEY BOTH YELLED YES INSTINCTIVELY THEYRE RAISING A CHILD TOGETHER THEYRE LITERALLY RAISING A CHILD TOGETHER WHAT IN THE HELL

AND TALAY GOT UP SO FAST TO RUN AND HELP HIM

THAT WAS SO FREAKING SWEET IM SO ANGRY ABOUT IT

anyway. see you in like. a few hours. (that is, if i stay up, which i probably will)

[jackienautism]

going 2 be real for a sec

i usually keep this stuff to myself since its super personal and i probably will just sound like a crazy person bu t i really just want to get something down and post it and MAYBE get some sort of like ? validation. that im not the only one who feels this way or does this LOL

so just. long story short. does anyone get like physically ill over seeing someone else like . engaging and doing "more" with a special interest slash interest youre really really into? like. just like 10 or os minutes ago somethting happened and i started lowkey shaking and shit (but maybe its just bc its real hot where i am rn but idk) and felt sick to my stomach all bc someone was engaging "more" with something i rly rly like and i just uuuuugh

ive had this feeling ever since i got into until dawn and the quarry lol...... this feeling has been occurring a lot less frequently than during like last year. which like. speaking of. when the quarry first came out the feeling came and WEEEENT....... ALLL THE TIME. like i wasnt even into the game that much yet but seeing other ppl engaging w/ and making content for it...... made me feel suuuper ill. or maybe was it when i first started getting into it? yeah i think it was when i first started hyperfixating. but anyway LOL IT WAS A TERRIBLE FEELING. AND IT HAPPENED SO OFTEN TOO

luckily its gotten a lot better in terms of the quarry. especiailly after joining tumblr and all. but until dawn? naaah its still very much there lol. as i said earlier, it doesnt happen as much as it used to (in regards to UD) but. it stilll happens. as i just fucking found out. ive settled down quite a bit now but good god

until dawn is such a dead fandom but theres just some things that when i see it it still makes me go wiiiild (negative). i dont know why. it makes feel so sick. and i dont hold it against anyone of course, it just affects me interacting w/ slash following people LOL! and it mainly has to do w/ sam and emily LMAO especiallly sam as ive come to find out.... i think its becasue ive projected sooo much of myself onto her that im like super protective and shit. like... shes not your fictional public character shes MINE. and thats not your public piece of media. its MINE. you know?

and its liike. i KNOW that there are ppl who are more into UD and have been into it longer than i have. i know that. and htat doesnt always affect me. but tthen therr are just osme other times where it seriously DOES and its just.... man. i wish i werent like this LMAO

i think thats like the. basis of it. im just. man. and its such a hard thing to shake off ): i know im just gonna have to "get over it" and "learn to live w/ it" but man!!!!!!

idk man. just seeing others "understanding" a character "more" than i do and seeing others do suuuuper in depth character analyses just..... ESP if its characters i rly relate to and basically projected every part of ,my being onto........ it makes me ill!!!!!! like genuinely!!!!!!!!!

and its like weird bc like. i was SUPER into mean girls the musical back in 2019 / 2020 and so forth. but i dont ever remember getting THIS BAD over others being "more" into it than i was. and this isnt just straight up jealousy. i know how that feels and its DEFINITELY not that. i truly dont know what makes until dawn / the quarry so different. maybe becasue this was the first time ive engaged more with the fandom? especially on tumblr? i dont know man. i dont kn ow

hopefully this makes sense. im just tired

[miscellaneous--bones]

shows everyone this oc i made n folks love her and then 2 minutes later come out with new ocs that im even more obsessed with like haha sike sorry. i was gonna wait until i had more drawings of howl but ive already been sittin on em a couple days so yk

anyway these are what came from that doodle page mess from a minute ago, goose was the first but i needed an oc who would work to be shipped w snatcher so then i made howl and decided there were 5 of them. they're supposed to be mostly borzoi/italian greyhound mixes? idk. either way they run on ahit rules but i might use em in other places too idk yet. Summary of their characters are below the cut

so they're a litter of 5 and no one is keeping track of whose oldest or youngest or whatever

unusual i know but i also cant figure out where i want them to be anyway so shut ur face

we'll just go left to right from the top

somewhere on her travels goose ran into hk and bow and was worried about these strange children being alone in space so she decided to come with them and like they arent gonna complain about their new dog

shes not the best with other people but she takes good care of them both and keeps them protected and fed and whatnot.

it works its cute

shes the only one who has a collar because shes the only one who has a person out of her siblings

nk n then howl! howls got a lot going on

they got a fairly dinky ship when they left it was sturdy enough but like not Good good yk

and at some point way before hattie and bow and goose end up there, they pass over harbor because theyre tryna figure out if they wanna stop for a supply run or not and the mafia shows up n makes trouble ofc

she gets the mafia to leave her alone but in the process ends up crash landing somewhere near subcon (not sure if its like in the woods or just off the borders but close enough either way)

in the crash tho, a bunch of time pieces shatter n get fucked up and end up scattered across time

she has to go through and try to clean all THAT up because plain n simple those things are hard to get and just leaving a jumbled mess like that it Very Not Safe

in this whole debacle her family dont know whats happened and the ship is kind of undocumented because the crash basically happened forever ago but also it hasnt yet but also it never did?? so like. shes missing for a good decade before shes finally back to her present (by this time hat n bow have come n gone so she missed goose anyway)

while she was going through time collecting time peices, she got in whole heeps of trouble and while its only been 10 years in her present it feels like its been at least 50

shes gotten acused of witchcraft, cursed about 5 times over, there was that one time she was thrown in a dungeon for 7 years for disrespecting a king or something

point is they came back fucked up

they're half undead and their soul is a little bit missing because someone stole it at some point and they only barely got it back a little bit. also cursed to be tied to shadows so being in the sun too long isnt very good for them.

ive also been playing with the idea they were cursed to live either other people's spirits and energies OR their flesh. not sure which yet

i do feel like it'd be nice if they and snatcher could end out with a deal where he eats the souls and she eats the bodies. or something

this whole change of theirs is supposed to be shown by them loosing their white on their face. theyre the one laying down in the last drawings which is supposed to be them while their in college years and shes got her white face. she looses it when she gets all tied up in the darkness thing. she also gets taller than her siblings they were the shortest originally

neway im till daydreaming abt the whole thing so yk

the other siblings are less important but still cute

duke is also an astronaut but his explorations tend to go better apparently. he comes home with a cute alien boyfriend later

paris owns a boutique that brandy helps her out with- they stayed on their home planet together with their parents when the others went to space.

speaking of, brandy is rlly nice

aside from her different markings which always set her apart real nice shes also trans. so grew up a little bit othered but still very very loved and also her and paris are besties obvi

brandy is good i like her a lot. i think shes be like second eldest if not eldest eldest if i had a real order there

her and howl bond over having different markings from the otherwise when howl finally gets home :)

[okamixxiii]

Elijah 01

Being on tumblr makes me wanna feel more homely and less professional and then I suddenly remember I can just like,, lore dump anytime I want and post out of a time schedule just like back in 2014. Anyways someone on Deviant Art asked about Elijah! So ill be chatting about him in this moment. Cant say today because LMAO Ill probably be back on here later talking about another oc.

I dont really talk about him as much as I should and I have very few content of him in it. Truth is I purposely dont really expand on him as much as to try and bend/taint his character that I fleshed out for him to be. Its something that happens quite often when I try to dive too deep and I find that by a fault a lot of my characters end up feeling the same-- to me at least. So its a preventative measure.  Here IS what i have about him though: Elijah Alan Spence, Agent Spence, Code name Black Rabbit, or for some: Eli!  He’s an elite agent that has worked his way up through T.K.E.A ranks (ill make a t.k.e.a thing later just check lore tag or somn before I actually decide to learn how to structure my text posts). Although he’s an elite agent dont think that his views align with what T.K.E.A is doing. Hes mostly a ‘good’ guy wrapped up in bad things type deal since I love doing that for some reason.  The initial belief was that he could work his way up and change it that way but its clear that because of him being brought into the agency as only an agent that there was a dead end when it comes to working yourself up to more ceo levels. The highest you can go would be what he is; an elite.  When he realized that was also when he realized that T.K.E.A basically silences any defective agents so there was no way to change things without getting himself murdered. So he was put in a space where he had to continue his job while figuring out how to fix things undercover.  Unfortunately until Chris (when T.K.E.A really started fucking up) there wasnt anything that was really pushing him to just make the jump without thinking.    Now I know that sounds weak ended on his part but let me explain something:  Elijah was very very inspired by tah-dah! 

BBC Sherlock! *1# on all time favorite and comfort shows to watch and HAS seen it 10 times in total. No, Im not joking.*

So if you picked up on this, congratulations! Here's a cookie. Now that means in this he has a very similar qualities as Sherlock Holmes that he cannot operate without thinking things through. Not until a time really calls for it. I am NOT saying that Christian Edens is his John, gods no. In fact his “john” actually was his partner (in the work sense) died at a job.  Its just more or so the situation with Chris was a final straw, one that really made Elijah say ‘enough is enough!’. He may seem brief and brutally honest on the outside that often makes him come across as an asshole but on the inside he truly does have a heart for those in need and a drive to stride for something better for everyone. Its just he will be doing it in his own way and gods forbid if anyone tried to change his direction he laid out for himself. Hes very stubborn. 

Elijah took the cards he was dealt with and made the absolute most of them of what he could. It just, wasnt enough at the time.

Hes highly intelligent, though bit rough around the edges when it comes to socialization. Like Sherlock again as his inspiration, he can make quick deductions but has a hard time keeping his mouth shut when he makes those deductions. Not everyone enjoys his honesty and way of ‘no bullshitting’.  Just because he has a heart doesnt mean he isnt a bit egotistical at times either. Its just not all the time. its like “hey look at how smart I am!”.  Other things to note is wow! Hes a rabbit shifter! His pronouns are he/him strictly and hes *sighs* straight. One of the very f e w ocs I have that are cishet. Though sometimes I do make some interesting hcs about him at least trying things. >_> Idk if ill put those here though. They are sexual in nature. LOL