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thebibliomancer · 2 years

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Essential Avengers: Avengers Annual #16: The Day DEATH Died!

October, 1987

Fifteen Avengers battle the warriors of DEATH!

Being superheroes sometimes means you have to fight a bunch of dead dudes to save the universe. NBD. Except its a very big deal due to the aforementioned fate of the universe.

Is that fucking Norman Green Goblin Osborn in the mix? How is him being a warrior of the DEAD going to gel with him actually founding a cult in Europe those years he was assumed dead?

I’m counting the “fifteen Avengers” and for one thing, we’re definitely honorary-ing Silver Surfer and Moon Knight to get a round number, huh? BUT ALSO, Tigra is the one actual Avenger who doesn’t get on the cover. Oof, no respect.

Last time on West Coast Avengers Annual #2: the East and West Coast Avengers are having their annual baseball game when the East Coast Avengers drop dead. The West Coast Avengers go to the Collector on Silver Surfer’s advice and on the Collector’s advice chug poison. This lets them find the East Coast Avengers in Death’s domain. Then the two teams fight because the Grandmaster and the Collector told them conflicting stories.

BUT TWAS ALL A RUSE. The West Coast Avengers winning the fight... uh... well, something is going on and Grandmaster has taken Death prisoner and says the universe is his.

More explanation, please.

The two teams of Avengers don’t wait for an explanation. On Captain America’s command, they all rush forward and try to attack the Grandmaster.

Thor claims that even an Elder like the Grandmaster can’t stop them all but he effortlessly brushes them aside, explaining that he has absorbed Death’s power.

Oh. That’s not good.

What is good is that as a villain, he feels compelled to exposit what happened.

IT ALL BEGAN when Korvac murdered the Collector so he wouldn’t narc on him to the Avengers.

For all their other foibles, the Elders of the Universe are a pretty loyal lot to each other so Grandmaster set about finding a way to bring the Collector back to life. Eventually, he settled on a wager with death - the Contest of Champions.

And the Contest of Champions was such a spectacle that it gave him an idea. An awful idea. A wonderful awful idea.

Step one was to throw the Contest of Champions wager so that the Collector was brought back to life but Grandmaster’s life was forfeit.

Step two was to just hang around Death’s realm, studying her.

Um. Do dead people just get to hang around peeping on the big boss? Is that really how death and Death work in the Marvel universe?

Anyway, step three was to contact the Collector on the downlow to set up his plan.

Step four was that the Collector is the one who killed the East Coast Avengers and dunked them into Death’s realm. And when he helped the West Coast Avengers kill themselves so they could go to Death’s realm, the intentionally conflicting stories each Elder told an Avengers team guaranteed they’d fight.

And a big, exciting happening right on her front door drew Death’s attention and while she was spectating, Grandmaster seized her. Which is something he can do. Shut up, yes he can.

Anyway.

Death earned some respect back from me. Its not great that such a simple plan hoodwinked her power from her. But at least she didn’t gamble her power on a superhero slap fight.

But with his greatest game won, Grandmaster has decided he’s bored of this universe. What’s left to challenge him? Nothing, that’s what.

Grandmaster: “I belong to a race of beings which first gained sentience in the wake of the Big Bang -- the cataclysmic event which began this universe! For countless eons, I have watched the game of life played out on an infinite number of worlds! I am bored, and desire a new game! Behold the life-bombs I have created with the power of death! Scattered to the five most distant corners of the universe, they will start a massive chain reaction which will result in -- A NEW BIG BANG!! Think of it! The universe will begin over anew! We’ll have a new game of life to play -- one designed by me!”

Hey!

I don’t think the universe has five corners or corners at all!

Also, hey! That would kill literally everyone!

Captain America doesn’t like this one bit. And a straightforward assault having failed, he instead challenges Grandmaster to a game! A sporting chance!

Luckily, Grandmaster prepared such a challenge ahead of time.

Oh no, its Swordsman, Nighthawk, Skurge the Executioner, Terrax the Tamer, Hyperion, Green Goblin, Korvac, Death Adder, DRACULA, Bucky Barnes, Black Knight I, Captain Marvel I, Baron Blood, Drax the Destroyer, and Red Guardian!

Several of these people turn out to not actually be dead but that kinda thing always happens whenever someone uses a bunch of dead characters as a team to fight a superhero team.

And there’s a handwave for it later.

Anyway. The game is this.

Grandmaster will transport some Avengers (+ guests) and some of the Legion of the Unliving to the location of one of his life-bombs.

Team Avengers will try to destroy the bomb before it goes off, Team Legion will protect the bomb and try to kill the Avengers.

But Grandmaster tells Death he’s actually stacking the deck.

Grandmaster: “This should prove very interesting -- even though the Avengers are destined to lose! In the past, my fascination with skill and chance has often affected my judgement and overwhelmed my desire for victory -- but not this time! I will not allow my love for the game to interfere with my ultimate goal! I am determined to win this contest at any cost -- to seize the greatest prize of all -- THE UNIVERSE ITSELF!!”

Holding unfair games? You really are a villain, Grandmaster!

MATCH ONE: Hawkeye, Thor, and Doctor Pym VS Swordsman, Skurge the Executioner, and Nighthawk!

Hah, wow. Swordsman was Hawkeye’s teacher, Skruge was a fellow Asgardian and died for Thor, and Nighthawk is... some guy? Hank got the short end of the stick here in matchups.

Also, the Grandmaster put the first life-bomb in Hades. Literally sent these three Avengers to hell.

... Is Hades/Hell part of the universe? I mean, it would have to be since the universe is all the everything. But usually its treated like a separate dimension. But I guess you can have a lot of dimensions that all make up the 616 universe. I guess?

I also like Dead Swordsman calling the Avengers a “stupid team.” Sounds like sour grapes coming from a dead guy who once begged to join.

Nighthawk makes the first move, jetpacking at Dr Pym, yelling about what a lousy superhero he is not having powers or a costume.

Dr Pym responds by pulling a gas grenade launcher out of his pants and blasting Nighthawk with it.

The ability to pull whatever tool you need right out of hammerspace IS a cool superpower, no matter what that Nighthawk chump says.

Thor squares off to fight Skurge. But less fight and more attempt to talk with. Because Skurge recently sacrificed his life for Thor and Thor feels weird about having to fight him, even if its for the sake of the universe.

Skurge cheap shots Thor and mocks his hesitance.

Skurge: “’Tis a pity that honor paralyzes you! I have no such weakness -- no honor -- no loyalty -- nothing -- save a savage desire to crush you -- to make you pay for having caused my death!”

Meanwhile, Hawkeye fights Swordsman.

He doesn’t have a problem with the concept even though he has a personal connection to this dead man. Its just the dick keeps cutting his arrows out of the air with his sword.

(Also to note, despite She-Hulk destroying Hawkeye’s bow and quiver last issue, he has it back now. Mighty kind of the Grandmaster to replace it for him?)

As the heroes are all stymied by their opponents, the life-bomb starts glowing, getting ready to explode.

Dr Pym is pinned down by Nighthawk firing wing lasers at him. That is, lasers that come from the tips of his wing-like cape.

Pym enlarges a shield and bounces some lasers back, destroying Nighthawk’s wings but the lasers also cause a cave-in.

Dr Pym enlarges a brace (because he really does have everything) to hold up the roof but Nighthawk breaks a stalagmite and uses it to impale Hank while he’s distracted.

The collapsing roof collapses, burying both Nighthawk and Dr Pym, but Nighthawk accepts this since he’s already dead.

Oof.

Well. One hero and one opponent out of the fight.

Meanwhile, Thor realizes from Skurge being a big ol’ dick that this isn’t the Skurge that sacrificed himself for Thor.

Thor: “You are not the god I once knew! For all his faults, the Executioner was a man of honor! A warrior-born! You are only a nameless shade in his guise! A grim phantom conjured up to torment me -- and I shall suffer you no more!!”

And once Thor starts trying, he knocks out Skurge in the very same panel.

Meanwhile, Hawkeye knocks out Swordsman. Now that he has Swordsman knocking every fired out of the air, it was simple to sucker him with an arrow that electrifies when struck.

But the delay in beating their opponents, the bomb is about to go off. And neither Thor nor Hawkeye can defuse it in time. Thor fears the universe is doomed unless --

Unless he swings his hammer REALLY fast. It solves a lot of problems. But in this case it solves the problem by creating a vortex that surrounds the bomb and Thor. The bomb does go off and eradicates Thor but the universe is saved.

Hawkeye takes a second to realize that Thor disappeared in the contained blast. And then realizes Dr Pym is gone too.

His two companions are dead.

SCENE CHANGE!

Wow, these groups are not evenly broken up at all.

Group 1 was three people. Group 2 is four: Captain Marvel, She-Hulk, Moon Knight, and Tigra. Cool that its two from the East Coast Avengers and two from the West Coast Avengers though.

Captain Marvel doesn’t waste any time, she immediately nyooms toward the bomb to see if she can figure out how to defuse it. But the Grandmaster handpicked suitable opponents to stymie the Avengers and guests. And unfortunately, despite Captain Marvel’s usual difficulty to harm in light form, the Grandmaster selected Captain Marvel (Mar-Vell) and Drax the Destroyer to oppose this group.

Drax claims that he and Mar-Vell both have the ability to absorb energy. That’s true for Mar-Vell but I’m not seeing anything about that for Drax. He might be just making shit up.

I guess even if its just Mar-Vell absorbing energy out of Monica, it’d be bad enough.

She-Hulk throws a tree and interrupts Drax and Mar-Vell’s attack on Captain Marvel.

Drax immediately comes after She-Hulk but she knocks him away.

Green Goblin shows up as opponent number 3 and starts attacking Moon Knight. He gloats that though Moon Knight is fast, Green Goblin tangles with an even faster opponent. But as Moon Knight points out as he decks Green Goblin in the jaw, Green Goblin lost to said opponent.

(Dunno how Moon Knight knows that.)

While Tigra tries to decide which of her friends and acquaintances to help, opponent number 4 shows up. Death Adder pops out of the lake and drags her underwater. Just one slash from his claws and she’ll be lethally poisoned! Also, she’s underwater! She may have cured her cat soul problems but this is still a less than ideal situation!

Captain Mar-Vell flies around trying to blast Captain Marvel with his photon blasts. Wait, she can absorb those. Why is she dodging? Dammit, Monica! Drax lied that he can absorb energy and you forgot that you actually can do it! You did it last issue!

Anyway, Captain Mar-Vell berates her for resisting the inevitable so hard.

Captain Mar-Vell: “The universe is doomed! You have about as much chance of saving it as you do of avoiding my photon blasts!”

Captain Marvel: “Wise up, mister mouth! Avengers don’t quit! We never give up -- no matter what the odds!”

Drax has been getting his shit kicked in by She-Hulk but he channels the Drax the Destroyer single-minded obsessiveness (aimed at She-Hulk instead of Thanos due to Grandmaster) and shatters her spine with a surprise attack while She-Hulk is distracted looking at Tigra’s plight.

Meanwhile, Moon Knight is having a bad time. Even though he can go toe to toe with Green Goblin, Grandmaster didn’t replace all of Moon Knight’s gear like he did for Hawkeye. So Green Goblin is able to keep out of reach and bombard Moon Knight with his own goblin gear.

Moon Knight dodges the pumpkin bombs but isn’t so lucky when Green Goblin throws a gas grenade full of hallucinogenic gas. Overwhelmed by grotesque imagery, Moon Knight can’t dodge when Green Goblin blasts him with his finger sparkle gun.

Green Goblin: “Is something troubling my friend? Don’t despair! The Green Goblin can put an end to all your worries -- for all time!!”

Dick.

Meanwhile also, Tigra manages to break away from Death Adder and get out of the lake. She climbs a tree and baits Death Adder to follow her. When he does, she suddenly wheels around and slashes him, figuring either the disembowelment geez! will kill him or falling from the tree will. But Death Adder lashes out with his tail and the toxin on his spines paralyzes Tigra and she falls to the ground too.

Captain Marvel manages to dodge Mar-Vell long enough to reach the bomb. She has to use the rest of her strength but she busts the force bubble around it and then safely detonates the bomb.

Hooray!

Except...

Lying broken on the ground, She-Hulk and Tigra die, a mere inch from holding hands. Moon Knight is dead nearby. And since three of the opponents weren’t beaten, they all gang up and kill Captain Marvel.

Because the match doesn’t end until one side is completely out of action, even if the bomb is stopped.

Geez.

What a PG bloodbath.

So we go from a group of three to a group of four to just one dude?

How are you deciding these divisions, Grandmaster?

Location three for the Grandmaster’s life-bomb is just the middle of space. Luckily, the Silver Surfer is well-equipped to nyoom to the bomb. Unfortunately, the Surfer’s chosen opponent is Korvac. And with his vast cosmic power, he has surrounded the life-bomb with an invisible barrier.

Korvac is also still in his casual phase so he’s kicking back in a recliner, with a drink, in his sitting around clothes while he tries to help destroy the universe.

Korvac: “I am Michael Korvac. There was a time when my name was known and feared throughout the entire universe. You see, I possess the power cosmic on a scale far greater than even you can imagine. Let’s be civilized, shall we? Since there’s no possible way for you to defeat me, we might as well enjoy a drink together while the universe goes bye-bye. What’s the matter? Don’t you care for champagne? Maybe you’d prefer a nice hot -- COSMIC BOLT!”

Silver Surfer no-sells a bolt that could destroy a world because he “has basked in the glow of a thousand suns!”

You’d think that Korvac would know that, considering the origin of his cosmic contender powers were from draining the computers from Galactus’ ship.

But then again, we’ve established that the people Grandmaster summons to fight for him aren’t quite the actual people they were.

Real deal or no, Korvac doesn’t fuck around. He magnetizes Silver Surfer and lets him be crushed by enough meteors to form a small planet.

Silver Surfer manages to bust free with his own POWER COSMIC. A stray rock knocks Korvac on his ass and distracts him long enough that Silver Surfer also manages to break the barrier around the life-bomb.

Korvac intercepts Silver Surfer as he’s making another pass to destroy the bomb and melts off Silver Surfer’s silver protective coating, killing him as unprotected his body can’t survive space travel.

But Norrin Radd’s last act is to aim his board so that it slams into the bomb, destroying it and killing both Norrin Radd and Michael Korvac.

Grandmaster snarks that he’ll call that match a draw. And then gloats to Death that he’s already arranged things so that the heroes have “virtually” no chance to win.

And we’re back to big groups!

Iron Man! Mockingbird! Black Knight! Doctor Druid!

Again, two East Coast Avengers and two West Coast Avengers.

Also, kind of a team made up of fuck-ups. In later years, Black Knight learns that his sword is powered by how much of a fuck-up he is. Its a truly cursed sword.

The location this round is the ruins of an alien civilization. Unlike the previous rounds, the bomb isn’t immediately obvious so Iron Man proposes Lets Split Up Gang So We Can Cover More Ground.

Nobody realizing that this is how you die in a horror movie, they all agree.

But this apparently is a horror movie because Dr Druid gets attacked by ACTUALLY DRACULA moments later.

I guess that’s his chosen opponent.

Mockingbird meets her opponent not long after: the Red Guardian.

She immediately starts destroying his self-esteem.

Red Guardian: “Mockingbird, I am truly disappointed that you are the one I must face! The Red Guardian would have preferred a greater challenge!”

Mockingbird: “Why? Do you like being dead? Considering your current state, I can only assume that you blew it the last time you were in a real fight? A lot of men are like that -- they just can’t deliver when the pressure’s on!”

Red Guardian: “SHUT UP!”

Mockingbird: “The truth hurts doesn’t it, Mr. Macho?”

Iron Man also meets his opponent: Terrax the Tamer. He has control of rock and earth and is an ex-herald of Galactus. That’s not a great level of power to have to tangle with.

Speaking of tangle, Terrax wastes no time in tangling Iron Man up in a stream of debris to hold him in place long enough to throw a chunk of rock the size of Manhattan at him.

Iron Man has no time to block it and repulsors won’t be enough, so Iron Man rockets straight into it, destroying the rock.

Huh. This is one of the feats used by Death Battle to figure out how strong Iron Man is. Fun to see the feat in the wild, just like its fun to see memes in their original context.

Black Knight hears a rock the size of Manhattan exploding and reasonably assumes the world is ending. But his opponent shows up and tells him never to mind, its time to swordfight.

And his opponent is... the original Black Knight.

Sir Percy: “I am Sir Percy of Scandia -- the rightful wielder of the Ebony Blade, and a knight of the Round Table of King Arthur Pendragon!”

Black Knight: “You’re also the original Black Knight, and my former teacher! But, what are you doing here?”

Sir Percy: “Though my spirit once served as your mentor, and instructed you in the arts of combat, the Grandmaster has sent me here to challenge you... to the death!”

Black Knight: “No! I won’t fight you! I can’t -- !”

Sir Percy: “Then you shall die!”

Dr Druid’s fight with Dracula goes badly. Dracula can just turn to mist and be entirely unphased by any of Dr Druid’s martial arts. So Druid instead decides to try to use his MIND POWERS to win a battle of wills with Dracula.

Dracula is incredibly amused by this and agrees that a battle of wills is what they’ll be doing.

Meanwhile, the two Black Knights are stalemated in perfectly symmetrical violence with identical super cursed swords.

Also meanwhile, Mockingbird finishes mocking Red Guardian so thoroughly that he makes a careless mistake and she bonks him unconscious upside the head.

Mockingbird: “His biggest mistake was listening to the Mockingbird.”

Also also meanwhile meanwhile, Iron Man could shatter a rock the size of Manhattan by flying at it but the attempt badly drained his armor’s energy. So he pulls off a desperate hail mary gamble to beat Terrax.

Next time Terrax blasts energy at Iron Man, he absorbs it instead of dodging and fires it back at Terrax.

It works and knocks Terrax out of the fight but it destroys Iron Man’s armor.

Mockingbird finds the life-bomb and brings Tony over. Its complicated but with his mighty Tony brains, he starts figuring out how to defuse it.

Unfortunately. The dominoes fall.

Dr Druid loses his battle of wills against Dracula. The vampire breaks Druid’s neck and moves on to where Mockingbird and Tony are trying to defuse the bomb.

When Mockingbird sees Dracula, she lies to Tony that nothing is happening to get him to stay focused on the bomb. But her screams as she’s murdered by Dracula distract Tony during those last crucial seconds.

Boom.

One-fifth of the universe is suddenly gone.

A fact that Grandmaster glorifies in to the captive Death.

Grandmaster: “Fascinating! A full fifth of the universe has suddenly ceased to exist! So many galaxies... so many inhabited worlds... erased in an instant! In its own way, I find such devastation to be... startlingly beautiful! Can you feel it, my friend? The entire cosmos ripples with terror! The end is near! The end of all life -- and death!”

Oof.

I’m almost certain there’s going to be a reset button. Not so much for one-fifth of the universe being wiped out as all these characters. Pretty sure Tony Stark Iron Man has a lot more comics to be in.

But still. Feels bad to see a big fraction of the universe and Tony Stark Iron Man blow up because of Draculas.

Well. There’s one more fifth of the universe to protect from a bomb.

Captain America, the Wasp, and Wonder Man (so two East Coast Avengers and only one West Coast Avenger, to make up for when the first match had two West Coast and only one East Coast Avengers) appear in a frozen hellscape.

Unlike the previous round, the bomb is in plain sight. The heroes just have to get past Nazi vampire Baron Blood, Hyperion the Not-Superman, and GODDAM BUCKY BARNES to get to the bomb.

Bucky Barnes: “How’s it going, Cap? Kill any partners lately?”

God damn, shade or whatever of Bucky. Are you the real Nazi vampire in this group? Because you just went right for the throat.

Wasp winds up facing Baron Blood. He’s too tough for her Wasp stings. Despite her Wasp stings being powerful enough to knock down a small house. Well, maybe Wasp is dealing with a handicap. She says that its so cold she can barely move.

Anyway, like many times Wasp fights a dude too tough, she just finds a way to attack where he’s softer. In this case by flying into his ears and blasting his sensitive ear drums.

Damn, Wasp.

And Wonder Man winds up fighting Hyperion. They’re both the powerhouses. Although, Wonder Man’s last fight with a caped really tough guy didn’t go so well.

After an exchange of punching, Hyperion manages to belt Wonder Man twenty miles away. Wonder Man is surprised to learn that he can be hurt so badly anymore. One of his arms is broken. As are most of his ribs. But fate of the universe, et cetera, so he uses his last arm to fling giant chunks of ice at Hyperion. Who easily blasts them with his ATOMIC VISION.

Thiiiiis isn’t going well.

Captain America jumps in to help Wasp against Baron Blood so she suggests a CHANGE PARTNERS. Cap is having trouble fighting Bucky due to history and grief and whatever so Wasp will fight him.

It turns out to be a mistake.

Bucky takes advantage of how the cold is slowing her to flip behind her and crush her tiny body with a punch.

They nerfed her and then they killed her. Where is the justice for Wasp?

Cap sees this but can’t spare a moment because Baron Blood is still on his ass. But Cap is a master of judo. When Baron Blood latches onto Cap to try to drink him, Cap is able to use his better footing to flip Baron Blood.

And since he’s treated as defeated by this and since he screams and since there’s a conveniently positioned sharp spike of ice in the panel, yeah, I’m pretty sure Cap flipped him onto a spike of ice. In essence, staking him.

Meanwhile, Hyperion is tired of Wonder Man throwing rocks at him.

So he decides to kill him. Wait, not just kill him. Overkill him.

He tackles Wonder Man THROUGH THE ENTIRE PLANET and then INTO THE NEARBY STAR.

Yeah. I don’t care if he’s ionic energy now. That guy is dead. Super dead.

And do we even need the Sentry if Hyperion is going to throw people in to the Sun? That’s basically the only thing Sentry brought to the table. Just sayin’.

So everything is down to Captain America and Bucky. Bucky stands between Cap and the life-bomb which has just started glowing to explode.

Captain America: “You used to be like a son to me, Bucky. I loved you. I have always loved you! But I won’t let my personal feelings for you stop me from doing my duty! Too much is at stake! Too many lives are counting on me! I cannot fail!! Please forgive me... son.”

And Captain America launches a no-holds-barred beatdown on Bucky. Bucky doesn’t even get a chance to react before Cap leaves him facedown in the snow.

So let that be a lesson. Captain America will definitely beat up a dead child to save a fifth of the universe. Even if he feels immense personal guilt for that specific child’s apparent death.

With nothing standing in his way, Cap smashes the bomb with his shield.

Huh. Luckily that’s all it took. Captain Marvel and Silver Surfer had to put a lot of effort into getting through the shield around the bomb. Then again. When Captain America throws his mighty shield, all who oppose his shield must yield. Yeah, he didn’t throw it this time. But its the principle of the thing.

Also, Hyperion bodyslamming Wonder Man into the star has created an immense solar flare that’s glaring brightly in the sky. Cap wonders if he stopped the bomb only to die by solar flare but he gets teleported away.

Captain America and Hawkeye find themselves back in front of the Grandmaster.

As they realize that no one else has returned with them, the Grandmaster informs them that they are the only survivors of round one.

Captain America: “Round one -- ? What do you mean round one?!”

Grandmaster: “Hmm, only need four bombs this time... Surely, Captain, you didn’t think I would allow our last game to end so quickly. No, no, no, I fully intend to keep on playing and playing -- until I win!! You will please note that the Legion of the Unliving has added -- a few new members!”

A.k.a. every Avenger (plus guest) that died is now on Grandmaster’s team.

Hawkeye flips out seeing Mockingbird (and also his other friends) dead and mind controlled onto Grandmaster’s side. He shoots a bunch of arrows at the Grandmaster, although to no effect.

Hawkeye: “You miserable, stinking -- ! You killed my wife! Murdered her!! You slaughtered my friends!! Used them all as pawns! Playthings!! Why? Why? WHY?!”

Grandmaster: “Because I make the rules... and that is how my game is played!”

Captain America slaps some sense back into Hawkeye and tells him to get his head in the game. They need to think of a way to beat Grandmaster. Because clearly playing his game until they both die isn’t the best course of action.

Sometimes slapping your friend is good actually, I guess, because Hawkeye does come up with an idea.

He pulls out his last two arrows and proposes something more interesting.

Hawkeye: “We all know how your old life-bomb game is gonna end, so why bother going through the motions? What I’m proposing is a new contest! A simple game of chance!”

Captain America: “Are you insane?!”

Grandmaster: “A game of chance? Go on...”

Hawkeye: “Choose an arrow. You get the one with the head, you win.”

Grandmaster: “Captain America is right. You are insane. Why should I risk certain victory to participate in this whimsical contest?”

Hawkeye: “Why not? You’ve devoted your entire life to playing games of skill and chance! You’ve always lived for the love of the game -- and the challenge! Just think of all that’s at stake! All that’s resting on a simple choice! A whim of fate! How can a gamesman like you resist a challenge like that?!”

Hah. Its the perfect bait. Even though Grandmaster rigged the game this time to make absolutely sure his love of games wouldn’t screw him over here... Well, the Elders of the Universe are monomaniacs. Grandmaster was probably thirsty for a stupid game like this after sitting through a rigged game.

So even though Captain America hates that they’re leaving the fate of the universe to blind luck, he concedes Hawkeye picked a good stratagem. Even if the Grandmaster wins the pick an arrow game, it may distract him enough for Cap to try to attack him.

But he doesn’t pick the right one.

Hawkeye rigged the game. When Grandmaster picked the arrow with the head, Hawkeye just snapped it off in his palm. You can even see the sound effect in that panel.

Seems only fair. A rigged game for a rigged game.

I like that the Grandmaster didn’t even agree to release Death if he lost. She just broke free because he was distracted. Kind of like how she didn’t agree to anything, he just took advantage of her distraction.

Anyway, Death is tired of all these dead people fucking up her life and ejects Hawkeye and Captain America from the afterlife.

They wind up back at the Houston Astrodome and all their friends are back to life!

Captain America decides this was Death rewarding them for stopping the Grandmaster. Which means that Grandmaster may still be out there somewhere but Mockingbird and Hawkeye tell Cap that that’s a later problem. They should unwind with some BASEBALL.

As a punchline to Cap’s astonishment with Hawkeye cheating the Grandmaster, he tells Thor to keep an eye on Hawkeye during the ball game. “He cheats!”

Hah hah!

Elsewhere, in space, Grandmaster crows that Actually He’s The Real Winner Here, If You Think About It.

Death was so pissed at him, she exiled him from her realm permanently. I.e., he’s immortal now. Uh, more immortal than he already was, which was conditional and he could die if killed.

Grandmaster: “The entire universe was within my grasp -- Everything could have been mine! The Avengers will pay for what they’ve done to me! They’ll... they’ll... What are they playing down there?! Baseball? Hmmm...”

AND THEN HE GETS DISTRACTED WATCHING THEM PLAY BASEBALL!

I love Grandmaster when he’s a wacky space guy, obsessed with every game. THere’s just so many ways you can use him. Usually its for superhero fights, as seen here. And in his first appearance. And also in JLA/Avengers.

But what if he decided to stake one of his tricky wagers on the Avengers playing baseball with each other?

I’ve said I’d love one of those stories that start with baseball to simply play a whole game through and you could use the Grandmaster making a wager with someone as an excuse for why its important enough to get to be a story.

Also, almost everyone on both Avengers teams experienced dying and seems pretty chill with it. Superheroes are weird.

ALSO ALSO, wait did we just leave La Espirita in space with the Collector?

Follow @essential-avengers because its good times. Do you see this good times? So good. Like and reblog too, please. It motivates me.

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ncoincidences · 2 years

Note

I would die for L and Regulus. Anyways what was their first date like lol

somg!! bestie. hi. such a good question! although the answer..... for some reason i felt the need to make this post long :/.... bear with me, i'll eventually get to the point!!

features: excessive brushing of hair, bouts of embarrassment, two real life pictures of Regulus, and.... fluff.

first thing, their first date is going to be minimum eight months after they first met. [MINIMUM]. Regulus will be the first to notice that he’s fallen in love, although he wouldn’t notice it himself, someone else (Sirius, or another friend [if he has one]) has to point out how he’s often excited to meet L and loves spending time with them, and that it’s kind of different. so they’d be like, “Do you two have something else going on?” if they’re not Sirius, and if it is Sirius, it would be a simple, “At least you guys don’t kiss in front of me.”

FEELINGS: so Regulus is first going to simply deny (he’s such a classic) and then he’ll be going in for a touch/hug w L and he’s going to do a mental retake. do best friends do this? do best friends cuddle so close??? and probably start distancing himself from L, not a lot, but remain subtly distant (although he doesn’t succeed much at ‘subtle’). L doesn’t point it out, but Reg’s absence makes them think a bit and that’s when they notice that they love Regs.

back to Regs. he’s going to criticise L and himself inwardly, like, “L walks like that. You can’t possibly like someone who walks like that.” but then L’s going to smile and he sees their dimples and melts quicker than ice-cream in 50°C heat. he likes them. ok, he likes them.

so he wants to get to know more about them. see if they’re really ‘right’ for Regulus. and the more he gets to know L, the MORE he likes them. falls deeper and deeper in love. they really are THE one. except, one day, L mentions that red is one of their favourite colours and MAROON is their main fav shade of red (wait, is maroon a shade of red?? anyway---). such a tragedy, right? Regulus dies! MAROON? of all people he could’ve chosen to fall in love with, but someone whose favourite colour is maroon?? ... Regs, this darling boy, expresses to L that he finds that a bit distasteful, but L takes that as a challenge ofc, and the next day, the very next yes, L meets Regulus dressed in a body-fitting maroon suit and .......

Regs dies. literally. dead. rip RAB.

look, real life picture of him—

seeing Reg’s reaction, L is a bit more confident, and thinks of asking Regulus out, but to do it in an impressive and spectacular way. something memorable for the person that makes memories worthwile.

switch to mr. r.a.b. - Regulus finally admits to himself that he’s completely in love with L. nbd. NBD at all.

oH, wAIT it IS A BIG DEAL BECAUSE THEY ARE HIS FRIEND. FRIEND. THEY COULDN’T POSSIBLY LIKE SOMEONE LIKE HIM THAT WAY.

[god, i imagine you’re shaking your head clutching your phone so hard.]

Regulus drowns himself in embarrassment because he’s forever going to be a pining fool and pathetic and lonely. his heart aches and his mind hurts. but L is so good. they are wayyy out of his league. they are SO GOOD. Reg, in comparison, is so spectacularly awful.

but being with L helps - 'you look so upset, are you alright?' - so okay. at least he has a best friend. Reg can absolutely deal with remaining best friends.

meanwhile, L is flirting a bit, giving clues to the possibility of asking Reg out, and Regulus is damn 100% oblivious. then comes the day of asking out and it’s very impressive, floating banners and bouquets of flowers and some magical decorations. better than any dream Reg has had.

real life picture of Regulus 0.2:

somehow, after 5 minutes of surprised silence and another 5 mins of “are you really...?” Regulus says yes.

THE ACTUAL DATE:

Regulus takes his time getting ready, something like four hours, wearing formal, the best of his best clothes, shoes polished, hair brushed a hUNDREd times, perfume snug. he’s not nervous, ofc not. he’s only.. mildly considering the extremely rare possibility that he might mess everything up and horribly ruin their friendship. it’s a very rare possibility, you must know.

WHERE? i don’t know if it’s going to be something formal like a dinner in a restaurant, still haven’t decided yet, but i imagine somewhere quiet and peaceful. perhaps a picnic date, watching the stars, lying side by side? some calming music playing. hands barely touching, faces flushed, slow conversation laced with excitement and expectation.

HOW DOES IT GO, you ask? extremely well. a bit of fine wine spilt, some stuttering sentences and faltering laughs, but in the end the awkwardness wears off. they’re friends best first and foremost!

they go home content. perhaps they go together, and sit close on the couch, feet tangled, read a book or two, before going separate ways or lying next to each other on bed, cuddling. it’s soft and warm and cute and loving. it’s what they both need <3

#regulus black #L #regulus x oc #fluff

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aclosetfan · 3 years

Note

ask game number 10?

(ask game) thank you so much for asking!!!!

BUBBLE BAND ♥♥♥

YESSSS YESS haha yessss someone chose 10!!!!!! So pumped for this one. For new fandom members (lmao I’m like a damn fandom historian), battle of the band fics got really popular for half a second b/c of the punks. I outlined my own where the punks are included but with a twist. No powers au, multi chap fic.

My outline is really detailed because I know I’m going to be writing this one!! It’s just too much fun, but I’m only gonna give you the jist, I don’t want to spoil too much :))) I’ve got like six pages of notes and I’m still not done mapping it all out. It’s supposed to be goofy as well as a big s/o to everyone who watched cringy amvs on youtube in the early 2000s <3

BACKGROUND:

Brick (lead guitar), Butch (bass), and Boomer (drums) are three brothers with a shitty garage band. They think they’re hot shit. They’re not hot shit (not yet). They’re good at playing their instruments but they don’t have a big following (or any good songs). On a good night, Mojo (their adopted father) indulges them and brings the crowd to a stunning total of 1.

PLOT:

One day, Boomer gets it in his head that he doesn’t want to be a punk rocker anymore. It’s dumb, he’s bored, and obviously, he is the next Picasso, so he quits the band. Brick all but disowns him as a brother. Butch is like dude I’d be cool staying in the band and Brick goes “you don’t have a choice!” Butch is like “aight, but now that Boom’s gone, can we maybe play a song I wrote?” Brick’s like, “no!” Butch is like “aight. That’s fair it’s dumb anyway. No harm, no foul bro. How are we going to get a new drummer as good as Boomer?” Brick’s like, “we’ll find someone better!” They won’t because, to give credit where credit is due, Boomer is quite a good musician.

Butch is like well this still sucks though cause we just got all those t-shirts. Like we’re broke af and they’ve got Boomer plastered on the front of them too. We can’t just replace them. Brick’s like “we’ll find someone better and someone who looks like him nbd.”

Brick and Butch don’t know any other drummers and they certainly don’t know anyone who drums and also looks like Boomer, so they make flyers~

“Annnd,” Brick chirped, grabbing the page from the printer, “done. There. Perfect. We just need to make like a thousand more of these and post them around the City.”

Butch yanked the flyer from his hand with a frown, his eyes jumping around it before he grimaced, “Man, I dunno.”

“What?”

“Must have blonde hair, blue eyes,” Butch looked up, “reads kinda neo-nazi-ish.”

Brick ripped the page from Butch with wide eyes, rereading the flyer. After a second he hissed, “Ah fuck. Fucking Boomer.”

“He ruins everything.” Butch solemnly agreed.

“Fascist can’t even be punk.” Brick huffed, glaring at the flyer.

Together they sat back in their chairs and regarded the flyer before turning their attention back to his cracked computer screen. After a few moments of hmm’ing and haa’ing, Brick snapped his fingers and leaned over his keyboard. He made the font big, bold, and red so it couldn’t be ignored at the bottom of the flyer:

‘CAN’T BE A FKING SKINHEAD’

“Dude,” Butch nodded, reading over his shoulder, “it’s beautiful.”

And then the boys post the flyers everywhere. Including their school, where most people ignore them regularly. Their flyers however become popular scratch paper for the art department where one Ms. Bubbles Utonium stumbles upon them. She takes it as a sign. She’s a bit of a drum hobbyist, but her dad has had enough of the racket and she needs to find a new place to play. She’s not practiced or anything, but she fits the four requirements to a “T”. She has blonde hair. She has blue eyes. She can play the drums. And she isn’t a skinhead! She thinks it’s silly they even had to clarify that. She’s not too into punk music but even she knows fascists can’t be punk! So on the day of auditions, she shows up with her drum sticks and gets in line!!

Brick and Butch are floored when Bubbles Utonium comes strutting in. They only know her because she’s a popular cheerleader at their school and shares an art class with Boomer, who only ever complains about the perky upbeat girl. Their first thought is to laugh, but when she starts playing, they’re like “oh?” She’s inexperienced, but she’s got a knack for it, and (as Butch points out) she is not a skinhead. Since she’s the best they’ve seen all day they offer her the position on the condition that she dresses like a dude when they play because of their t-shirt dilemma. She tells them that’s no problem, she likes playing dress-up, but they’ve got to work band practice around her cheer schedule. They agree.

The RowdyRuffs are a band once more.

Boomer btws is NOT AT ALL jealous. Not at ALL. Nope. (he totally is and he’s very obvious about it). In one of the early band practices that he barges in on to “check out the new drummer,” he’s ten shades of betrayed when he sees Bubbles of all people in his seat. He does not like Bubbles. Bubbles thinks Boomer is the bees-knees. He doesn’t like her because she’s good at just about everything he wants to be good at—except for drumming, which he proves then and there and is like “your new drummer sucks, later losers, you wish you still had me, by the way, dad wanted me to tell you he’s making tacos and they’ll be ready in ten.” Bubbles is not deterred by his behavior, thinks how he plays is really cool, and wants him to teach her, which he continuously refuses to do, but that doesn’t stop her from pestering him. (eventually, he does tho just a fyi; Bubbles is hard to resist)

Jumping forward in time, Princess becomes involved as their PR manager and decided that Bubbles shouldn’t act as Boomer anymore. They need “horny old man money” and everyone’s like ooooh yeah, horny old man money, neat! So, in all her genius, Princess decides to make Bubbles “Brat.” And boom! Here’s our first powerpunk girl.

It’s a hit with the crowd that the band is slowly starting to amass. After accidentally hearing Butch goof around on his bass, Buttercup ((((Bubbles’ sister, who at the beginning of the story takes pity on Butch and Brick and volunteers to help teach her sister how to be “punk rock”. She is also forced to drive Bubbles to and from band practice (because Buttercup is being punished for failing math)))) encourages him to pitch his songwriting to the rest of the band. He refuses. Brick’s the guy who writes the songs, who’s very bad at it.

However, after another shitty song about some mystery girl Brick swears he doesn’t have a crush on, Bubbles has enough and assigns the boys some songwriting homework. Butch writes a banger and their little band gets more recognition. They’re now playing sizeable gigs, but wait! OH NO! Bubbles and Butch aren’t going to make it to the show on time. Boomer’s like, “shit Brick! The show must go on, dude, but where are you going to find two people who know how to play the exact same instruments as Butch/Bubs, know all their cues, and all the songs in the next ten minutes????” Brick looks at Buttercup (plays bass like Butch/almost at all the band practices/has a lovely voice despite what she says) and Boomer (who was Bubbles before Bubbles) and goes “huh, genius, I wonder.” Buttercup’s like “oh no, wait wait! I’ve got stage freight!” To which Brick says, “get over yourself and join my shitty fucking band!”

And that’s how we get our Brute <3 (named by Brick). She’s a hit!

They just keep getting bigger and bigger as a band, and record labels are starting to take an interest, so after Brute debuts, everyone’s like welp, Brick needs his counterpart too. And it’s eventually Blossom, but that comes about in a roundabout way because Brick’s feelings are still hurt (she’s the girl he was crushing on, but she rejects him). Eventually, Bubs is like “listen, Brick, we need a Berserk (Butch name’s this imaginary person), and it's coming down to the wire. Blossom can do it. I know she can. It’s for the band.” So, he sucks it up and Blossom hesitantly accepts (she’s very much preppy pop to whatever Berserk is lol so it’s difficult for her at first). After a heart-to-heart with Brick, they make amends (I think I’ll leave it platonic for now tbh) and their first show altogether is a hit!

As always, there’s a happy ending :) They get their record deal lol.

I can’t write songs. I’m shit at poetry, but I was thinking about just choosing irl music and mashing them up, so the music is still “original” but people can also be like omg I remember that horrible song from my emo “phase.” I have to find a good song list first. If anyone’s still reading send me some recs. The music I like is too embarrassing.

#my writing #my outlines #outline ask game #BUBBLE BAND #this one just makes me smile because I get to listen to all my music from middle school #don't get me wrong middle school was shit #but the music was top notch #ppg fic outline

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akaashiclub · 4 years

Text

girls chase boys ☇ t.k.

☇ pairing: tsukishima kei x fem!reader

☇ genre: fluff, oc is an absolute babie who has no shame, tsukishima goes from ‘she’s annoying’ to ‘she’s aight’ to ‘i may be lowkey in love w her it’s nbd tho’, oc will literally not give up, tsukishima is still a first year (word count: 4.1k)

☇ synopsis: usually when experiencing such a soul-crushing rejection, one would give up on their feelings, right? right?

☇ a/n: i binge-read some haikyuu fanmanga and i was ~inspired~ plus like... this trope?? persistant bubbly x uninterested cold is?? literally everything?? (playlist link: here)

“i like you!!!”

you kind of felt like the main character of a shoujo, with the wind making your hair dance in the air

standing face to face with your longtime crush

(and by longtime, you mean about two months)

that’s when it all started

no— it was earlier

the orientation ceremony

all the first years standing in neat, organized rows, listening to the principal give a welcoming speech

at least, that’s what you were supposed to be doing

in reality, your eyes were trained on the 188cm tall blonde in the row in front of you

you couldn’t see the stage— also, you didn’t care

bc ~he~ was in front of you

tsukishima kei

you learned his name later when you discovered you were in the same class

and he sat in the adjacent row, one seat forward

the absolutely perfect position to stare at his side profile the entire class

and that is exactly what you did for two months

that and gathering info on him

tsukishima kei, 188.3cm (now 190.1), born on september 27th, best friends with yamaguchi tadashi, #11 on the karasuno volleyball team

and then there you were, confessing your undying love to him

...or something like that

“no thanks. not interested.”

usually, that would soul-crushing enough to make them leave him alone

not you <3

the giggle that escapes your lips makes his eyebrow twitch on confusion for a second

“that’s okay~” you respond.

(that’s okay ?)

(what the fuck kind of response is that being rejected ???)

(yours!!!!)

you’re exhaustingly persistent, as tsukishima comes to find out

or should i say—

“tsukki~!!”

the hair on his neck rises when you flounce into homeroom with that sing-song tone

you plop down into the seat in front of him (key note: not yours) and rest your elbows on his desk with a little grin

“don’t call me that,” (he doesn’t look up from his book)

“what~! why not?”

“only my friends call me 'tsukki’”

you snort, scooting a little closer

“that’s mean. how many times have we walked home together, and we still aren’t friends?”

“you followed me home, i didn’t consent.”

“‘followed you’?” you pout. “we live on the same road, naturally we’d walk home together,”

he doesn’t respond, just flips to the next page in his book

“do you have volleyball club today~?”

ignored.

lol

she stays strong!! she doesn’t give up in the face of adversity!!!

“you don’t have to answer, i already know you do.” you chirp. “it’s boring walking home without you... maybe i’ll come with you today~!”

it’s like talking to a wall

(a very cute, 190cm, blonde, glasses-wearing wall.)

(🥰)

instead of responding, he puts his headphones on and keeps reading

a small exhale escapes your lips, and one of the girls in the next row over leans towards you

“y/n... i think it’s a lost cause...”

“he’ll come around eventually,” you shoot her a smile, and then turn back to tsukki

you lean forward, reaching towards his head and tugging the headphones down around his neck

and when he looks up (he does within an instant), you shoot him a sly smile

several students around you gasp

after all, who would dare bother tsukishima with his headphones on??? that’s some instant death shit

“move.”

“i like being this close to you though,” you tease

and he rolls his eyes, standing up and heading for the exit of the classroom

the shock in the classroom — that you’re still ALIVE — is clear

your friend from before gapes

“y-y/n what are you playing at??”

“courtship,” you sigh dramatically, and hop to your feet to chase after the blonde monster

“tsukki~!! are you getting lunch?? wait for me~!!”

everyone on the first floor knows: it’s become the norm to see tsukishima, book in hand, headphones around neck, and followed by a chirpy pipsqueak

even yamaguchi doesn’t stick as closely to him as ‘tsukishima’s lapdog’ (as you’ve started being called by the fellow first years) does

the nickname doesn’t really bother you

after all, it’s just a reminder of your determination and refusal to give up

which is a virtue, in your mind!!

some people feel bad for tsukishima, constantly being bothered by you for weeks on end

others admire your stubbornness

and one group of people you can always count on supporting you are the karasuno volleyball club <3

ever since you started showing up to their practices

and all their practice matches and official games too

they all befriended you

but you grew tired of just sitting and watching tsukki on the sidelines, so you asked coach ukai if you could help out during practices!!!

there can’t rly be ... three managers... so you suggested retrieving balls or being tsukki’s personal assistant

he saw right through you <3

but it’s ok bc he thought it would be entertaining and agreed

tsukki: angy

even when he’s annoyed he’s cute tho <33 and you make sure to tell him that <333

and so! you get tsukki’s water, towels, etc etc (ofc u help other ppl too when they need it but tht’s what the two managers r for... tsukki is ur #1)

the other players are like 0.0 she’s kinda scary... but cute at the same time doe...

one day you’re in a particularly good mood (aka: a bad day for tsukki lol)

“tsukki~!”

“don’t call me that.”

“i want to tell you something,”

the whole gym is kinda just 👁️👄👁️ waiting to see what happens

“what? i need to change, hurry it up.”

ur inner monologue: kdNNN even when he’s mean he’s cute!!!!

but anyways:

“i like you,”

hinata, kageyama, tanaka, noya, literally everyone: 😳😨 mf what—

sugawara’s like “oh god he’s just reject her and crush her heart... right in front of EVERYONE—”

“not interested.” tsukki says, and his tone isn’t any less cold than usual

u kno that anime lightning effect when the character’s body is joLtED...

tht’s everyone else in the gym

tanaka and nishinoya are highkey ready to let you cry into their jerseys when—

you laugh

you right after being mercilessly rejected: 🥰

you can’t help it !!!!! it’s not discouraging you ok??? you alr knew what he’d say!!! but you had to tell him <3 can’t let him forget tht he’s the ✨love of your life✨

entire gym: s h o o k

“did she just l a u g h??”

“is she okay?? no srsly”

“what... just happened”

tsukki walks off, water bottle in hand

you follow after him, bouncing on the soles of your feet

“don’t forget your towel~! want me to wipe off your sweat~?”

“no thanks.”

cue fading banter between you two as he goes to change his clothes

he has to be like hOe GeT oUT for you to not go into the locker room lmfao damn... thirsty bitch... same tho

later tanaka and noya (feat. hinata who just wants to be included) jump tsukki

“shE LAUGHED WHEN U REJECTED HER??? IS SHE OK???”

“she confesses to me every week. she’ll do it again. it’s not that big of a deal.”

“not thAT BIG— can u imagine if kiyoko liked us that much.... ”

(cue tanaka sobbing)

tsukki was right tho

after the third time you randomly confessed to him in front of them they were just like

same shit different day, anyways rolling thunder

but they still highkey adopted you

so they go grr grr when tsukki rejects you all cold and shit

shockingly tho??? the more you confess the less it’s “not interested” and more just “*sigh*”

is this... PROGRESS???

but the zero braincell triad cornered him again in the locker room one day

(it’s their trademark)

(nishinoya) “so why do you keep rejecting her??”

(hinata popping in) “yea she’s super dedicated and helpful!!!”

(tanaka lowkey shuddering) “she’d probably let herself get hit in the face w a volleyball if u asked”

(and tanaka would be: correct)

(but anyway)

“she was annoying,”

“she... ‘was’ annoying???”

“... she IS annoying”

“tsukki... do you possibly like her??? but you’ve gotten so used to rejecting her that it’s automatic now??”

tsukki’s like V.V

“you’re reading too much into it,”

sage!nishinoya is about to probe deeper but at that moment you pop your head around the corner of the locker room and shout

“tSUKKI~!!!”

and they all scatter to hide themselves while shrieking

except tsukki, who is already clothed and gives zero fucks lmao

but anyways!!! a couple weeks pass and takeda got y’all set up with a practice match !!

with who?? nekoma!!!

hinata is like 🤩🤩 kENMA!!

only players and members of the club are supposed to go rly....

but you’re like “??? i’m tsukki’s personal assistant are you trying to take away my rights??? i’ll sue you” and coach ukai gives in sdjfkf

“tsukki can i sit with you~?”

yamaguchi about to sit there: 👁️👄👁️ bruh

tsukki doesn’t say yes but he also doesn’t say no :D

“what’re you reading?”

“english book,”

you’re like: wait— mf hold up... did he actually just answer ??

tsukki simp mode: ACTIVATED

“can i see??”

“you’re failing english, you won’t be able to read it.”

“ouch,” you pout, but there’s a small smile on your lips. “but how’d you know i was failing english?”

he doesn’t respond

“i guess it is unfair that i know everything about you and you don’t know anything about me...” you sigh

“you don’t know everything about me,” he retorts, still not looking up from his book

hehe~ gotcha

“oh? test me,” you grin, scooting closer to him

“don’t wanna.”

“you’re just scared i do know everything,” you say smugly, trying to bait him

“bet you don’t know everything about me!!!” hinata pops up from the seat in front of you

“you’re right, i don’t,”

(he pouts and disappears again)

“tsukki~” you whine. “tsukkiiiii~ i’m bored.”

“so?”

“can i wear your headphones?”

“no thanks. i don’t wanna get headlice.”

you scowl. “mean,”

you bite your cheek, staring a hole in the side of his head but he doesn’t even blink

if tsukki could major in ignoring you people, he’d have straight A’s

fortunately, you have ways to counter this

“kei~~” you whisper a little too close to his ear, and he jolts up

you try not to let the amusement show on your face, but you can’t help it

glaring at you, he pulls his headphones off his head and puts them on yours

“now be quiet,”

“mm~” you chuckle

a couple hours later, you pull into the parking lot of nekoma

the friend groups pair off, and kuroo makes a beeline for tsukki, only to catch sight of you

“hey four-eyes— who’s this?”

tsukki glances down at you, to which you shoot him a sugary smile

“dunno,” he says, and walks off

you wave to kuroo with a sunny grin

“i’m y/n~! i’m tsukki’s personal assistant and future wife~”

his eyebrows rise, and with a quick bow, you bounce after the blonde

once the group is all in the gym, practice jerseys are handed out and you help yachi and shimizu prepare the water and towels

you’re about to make a beeline for tsukki, when someone calling your name stops you

“y/n! wanna get me some water?” kuroo calls

you only blink for a moment before hopping to it, darting across the gym

for the rest of the day, kuroo is constantly calling for you—

“y/n! can you wipe the sweat off my neck?”

“hey, y/n, get me some water~”

“y/n!”

“y/n, over here!”

and by the time the several hours is over, you haven’t gotten to speak to tsukki once 🥺 snnff :(

when you finally get a free moment, you look around for him, but he’s nowhere to be found

sad face :(

and then !!!! turns out nekoma paid for bbq for everyone 🤩🤩 cats are so generous

and somehow??? you find yourself surrounded by nekoma players???

“here y/n, want some of my bbq?”

“no, take mine!!!”

“do you want any fruit?? i have some!!”

“you were so helpful today!! how’d you stay so energetic the whole time??”

you flash a smile, ready to charm the shit out of them, when a voice interrupts:

"hey, personal assistant.”

your eyes light up, bc you’d recognize that salty ass voice anywhere!!!

the guys around you part to reveal—

“tsukki!!!” you squeal, maybe a little too excitedly

“aren’t you supposed to be assisting me?? get me some food.”

you shove your plate into the free hand of one of the nekoma players (his name was... liam? lief... lev?) and dart to get tsukki something to eat

when you hand it to him, you flash him your most dazzling smile

“eat up! you worked hard today~”

he eyes you silently before digging in, and you smile absentmindedly while watching him

“why are you staring at me like that?”

“because i like you,” you respond without hesitation

he averts his eyes, but doesn’t say anything mean

your stomach flips a little

i’m coming for you, tsukishima kei.

on the ride home, you’re once again sitting next to him, and he gives up his headphones without a fight this time

you’re so tired from running around helping kuroo all day that you find your eyelids getting heavy as tsukki’s music plays in your ears

you try to subtly lean on his shoulder but he pokes you away

you glare at him, pouting, but settle for leaning against the headrest

and then, you’re drifting off

and you’re having a strange dream

a pleasant dream, with fuzzy corners and honey-colored light streaming across the scene, but still strange

in this dream, he’s kissing you

it’s not like you haven’t had dreams like this before, it’s just that this one feels so much more vivid

and yet blurry at the same time

even when the dream ends and you blink back into consciousness you can still distinctly feel his lips against yours

his glasses brushing against your cheek

his fingers interlacing with your hair

a warm smile curls up your lips as you grasp lingering wisps of the dream, when—

“you’re drooling.”

your eyes snap open and you jolt up, furiously wiping the side of your mouth

“am not!!”

tsukishima blinks uninterestedly from the empty bus aisle, arms crossed

��dreaming about something vulgar?”

you grin, resting your chin on your palm

“would you like to hear ab—?”

he’s just “nope,” and turns towards the exit

hopping out of the seat, you follow him

“it was such a nice dream,” you sigh

“must’ve been, if you were drooling that much.”

“i was not—”

and then you notice something

everyone else is already gone from the bus

“wait a minute... did you wait for me?”

you hear a scoff

bUt hE dOEsNt DeNy iT

“you WAITED for me!!!!” you exclaim, happiness radiating off you in waves

“if i’d left you on the bus, nishinoya and tanaka would’ve killed me if i didn’t,” he says curtly

but you are, after all, the human equivalent of ‘this sign can’t stop me because i can’t read’

or that tiktok trend

tsukishima: i don’t like you, i only waited for you because i was literally forced at gunpoint

y/n: 🎶i waited for you🎶

the next day, it’s practice as usual at the karasuno gym

but?? sniff sniff someone is here that shouldn’t be

this rando first year has been pacing around right outside the gym entrance

and all the vbc members are like 👁️ whomst?

and when you finally arrive (right along behind tsukki)

he yells out your name

and holds out a bouquet of flowers <3 how cute

“y/n, um— i, i know you don’t know me but i’ve liked you since the orientation ceremony!!! i think you’re really pretty and cute and smart—”

cue a quiet scoff from tsukki, “if she’s his definition of smart, then how dumb is he?”

cue sugawara jabbing his side (sugamama is protective of his child y/n)

“—and i know you like tsukishima, but i hope you’ll give me a chance!! i can make you happier than him!!”

at this point, everyone in the gym is watching like 👁️ oh?? TEA??

and is that... is that an aura of raging irritation coming from tsukishima??

you open your mouth to politely reject the guy, when

literally out of nowhere tsukki just a p p e a r s

“hey, idiot. aren’t you supposed to be my personal assistant?? go set out the volleyballs instead of flirting,”

you dip your head and smile apologetically at the guy before heading towards the store room

and after that, you notice tsukki is a bit harsher, a bit more off his game, a little more easily irritated than usual

during a free moment, you nudge tanaka

“doesn’t he seem like he’s in a bad mood??”

zero braincell tanaka is like “??? isn’t he always like that??”

“no... something is definitely off today...”

what . could it be . i wonder .

every time you try to do your usual “tsukki~!!” he just turns away and ignores you

doesn’t sound too out of the ordinary, but you can just tell something is wrong

you still have no idea why he’s acting like this by the time practice ends

and when you go to the locker room to find him (so y’all can walk home together), he’s already gone :(

so, a little more droopy than usual, you head out

only to be surprised by a voice when you step outside

“took you long enough,”

you whip around to see tsukki leaning against the wall with crossed arms

he clicks his tongue and then sets off

and when you don’t immediately follow him, he glances over his shoulder

“are you coming or not?”

sdjfksjsdkjfsdjf smmpdfhsdf !!!!!!!

it’s just one sentence, and it doesn’t really mean anything

but hearing the words makes something incredibly warm bloom in your chest

you grin

“of course i am,”

that feeling lasts well into the next morning, but is replaced by a nauseating knot in your stomach when you arrive at school

because everyone’s whispering about one thing:

“tsukishima got called to the principal’s office!!!”

“whaaat ! why??”

“i heard he was caught with the answers for the upcoming exam!!”

your stomach . clenches

and before anybody can say another word, you’re sweeping out the door and down the hall

and in less than 30 seconds, you’re slamming open the door to the principal’s office

the principal and tsukki both look up, equally shocked at your sudden appearance

“y/n, what—”

you ignore him for the first time in your life

“sir, i need to tell you something.”

the principal is just like “... ?? can it wait??”

“no, it can’t.” you take several steps forward “the test answers, they—”

“y/n, don’t—”

you ignore him for the second time in your life again

“they’re mine,”

the principal blinks

“then why was tsukishima found holding them before class??”

“yesterday, they must’ve fallen out of my backpack. he probably picked them up without knowing what they were, so please don’t punish him,” you bow. “punish me instead,”

.. y/n dumb bitch

yea, you’re suspended for two weeks

and ofc there’ll be a mark on your record

plus you’re automatically given a fail for the upcoming exam so you’ll have to retake it later oof....

but as much as all that sucks, you don’t regret it bc you’d rather take the fall than let tsukki be wrongly accused and suffer for it

but honestly the break from school is kinda vibes 🥴

don’t even think about the homework you’ll have to make up

your phone is blowing up with texts from your friends

including your surrogate dads and moms from the karasuno vbc 🤧 they’re so worried about you

you’re sad you have to miss practice for such a long time but... you don’t regret your decision

“y/n!!” your little sister knocks on your door “one of your classmates is here for you,”

“‘kay!!” you call back, checking the time

shidt bitch time flies when you’re watching anime alone in your bedroom

you hop up and open your bedroom door to come face to face with the one. the only. tsukishima kei

your eyes are like O.O

“tsukki??? what are you doing here??” you grin “are you here because you’re worr—”

“no,” he cuts you off “i’m here to deliver your homework,”

“you could’ve given it to my sister, y’know,” you tease. “why’d you come all the way to my bedroom?? you missed me, hm?”

he doesn’t answer, instead surveying the room before sitting down on the edge of your bed

you blink, surprised he didn’t comeback with a cold retort

“tsukki?” you ask quietly, sliding into your desk chair

after a moment of silence, he fixes you with a stoic gaze

“why’d you lie?”

“because... because i couldn’t let you take the blame for that. i don’t know what happened, but i know you weren’t cheating. i know it.”

“neither were you. what’s the difference?”

you press your lips together in a frustrated pout

“the difference is that it’s you!!! i’m mediocre. i’m not outstanding. i’ll go to an average college either way, and it’ll be fine. but you..! you’re so smart!! and talented!!! you could do anything you want!!! you could get into an elite college!! the last thing you need is for some stupid misunderstanding to sully your transcript—”

“y/n—” he tries to cut in, but you bulldoze right over him

“— and i know you probably think what i did was useless and unhelpful, but i don’t care!!! i don’t care about a mark on my transcript, or being suspended, or failing all my exams, or even being expelled—”

“y/n—”

“— but i absolutely refuse to let that happen to you!! you’re too special for—”

this time, it’s not him speaking that interrupts you

this time, it’s him kissing you

you nearly combust on the spot

tsukki— tsukishima kei is kissing you

he’s leaning over you, with one hand on the chair’s armrest and the other steadying your head with his fingertips

your stomach does several full somersaults

and then, all too quickly, he pulls away and returns to his spot on your bed

you stare, eyes wide as saucers, mouth slightly agape

“w— what was— why did—”

“you wouldn’t stop talking,” he mutters, eyes focused a little too hard on the wall

for a moment, you’re too shocked to move

and then your 🥰tsukki🥰 mode activates

and you just fuckin LUNGE at him

“y/n??? what—!”

kisses!!! kisses on his cheeks!! his nose!!! his forehead!!!

and shockingly he doesn’t?? push you off??

me heart just skipped a beat wjdkfjs

he’s just like “y/n, you’re fogging up my glasses, please stop,”

“i refuse!!!! i’ve been waiting months to do this!!!!!”

once he manages to de-suction you from him, you fix him with doe eyes and a cheeky grin

“hey, tsukki??”

“.. what?”

“i like you,”

he blinks

adjusts his glasses

“make sure to finish that homework. i’m bringing tomorrow’s homework too,”

as he’s leaving, you hope he can feel your glowing smile on his back

the next day, you get a message from the school letting you know that your suspension and other punishments have been retracted

as the real culprit of the cheating was found

an unannounced locker-search discovered several exam cheatsheets almost exactly like the one tsukki found in the locker of a student, and the school realized their mistake <3 how nice of them

and that meant you were free to return to school, name cleared!!!

the volleyball club was eagerly awaiting your return

so when they saw tsukki arrive for practice, they expected you’d be following right along behind him

but instead???

you were koala-ing on his abdomen

“bro... did you carry her all the way here like that??”

“the real question is why he allowed it,”

you shoot a blinding grin at the guys

“he can at least do this much for his girlfriend~!”

the entire gym is like WhA T !!!!!

“hE SAID YES???”

“nope,”

“he... asked you out?? then??”

“also no...”

“did he at least tell you he liked you...?”

“...”

“NISHINOYA STOP SHE’S TEARING UP,” sugamama to the rescue

you let go of tsukki and half the team goes IN on him

“dude wtf!!! she got suspended for you and you didn’t even at least tell her you like her???”

“not just suspended, almost expelled!!!”

“yeah that!!!”

“i say we kill tsukki,”

“tanaka no,”

“GUYS!!” angry!daichi makes an appearance “it’s time for practice!!!”

grumbling, the team disperses

you’re about to head to the store room to help get out the practice equipment, when—

“y/n.”

you turn “hm?”

he’s silent for a moment

“i wouldn’t have kissed you if i didn’t like you.”

your face flushes a deep red

but then he adds, “either time.”

either...? time...?

W A I T

your eyes POP OUT

“that— that wasn’t a DREAM???”

he doesn’t answer, just heads onto the court

but you think you see a slight smirk

and maybe... just maybe??

his ears are a little more red than usual.

#haikyuu #hq #haikyuu!!#tsukishima kei #tsukishima x reader #reader x tsukishima #haikyuu scenarios #haikyuu fic #haikyuu au #au #haikyuu fanfic #haikyuu imagine #tsukishima au #tsukishima scenarios #tsukishima kei au #girls chase boys #fanfic

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raysofcrosby · 5 years

Text

LITTLE DO YOU KNOW – T. SEGUIN

"𝘏𝘦 𝘩𝘢𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘴𝘦 𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘥 𝘦𝘺𝘦𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘴𝘩𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘭𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘰𝘧 '𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘺𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘣𝘦 𝘰𝘬𝘢𝘺'." ─ 𝐀𝐓𝐓𝐈𝐂𝐔𝐒

gif credit (x)

series masterlist

requested: yes | no

warnings: just some swearing nbd

word count: 4,113 [ oof yikes ]

authors note: originally i was gonna turn this idea into a fic, but like...i have no energy for that. so if anyone wants it to, it can be a multi part series for seggy boy :) anyway, stop by and request something or let me know what you think about this–– ok bye and enjoy!!

"Baby Benn, I need your assistance." You looked up from your Physiology book to see Big Rig, otherwise known as Jamie Oleksiak, or as you like to call him– a big teddy bear– make his way over to you.

"She's studying Jamie, what do you need?" Dave said, never taking his eyes off of Klingberg's ankle as he continued to tape it.

"What's more important? My deathly aching shin or this..." He picked the book up from your hands and lazily flipped through the pages, crinkling his nose in disgust. "This migraine-inducing book."

"Give that back," You said, standing up and reaching across the desk, taking your book from his hands. "This migraine-inducing book is what will get me my degree, which will hopefully lead to a job you teddy bear."

"Still didn't answer my question."

You sighed and marked the page before closing your book and standing up from the small desk. "Is it the same one?"

"Yup!" He smiled and hopped up onto one of the stretching tables, holding out his right leg. "So tell me doc, does it need to be amputated? Am I going to die of this killing pain?"

Before you could answer, he was getting smacked in the back of the head by a green resistance band. You looked over and saw Jamie, your older brother, rolling his eyes just as he tossed the band at you. "If you don't do your stretches it won't be the shin splints that kills you, it'll be me."

"Damn Chubbs, I was just playing," Big Rig groaned, rubbing the back of his neck. "You didn't need to almost decapitate me."

"Oh, so I can go back to studying?" You asked, holding out the resistance bands as your brother, Dave and a few of the other players getting serviced laughed. "Unless you want to write this paper for me after your game tonight?"

Big Rig rolled his eyes and grabbed the band, looping his foot through it and starting to stretch his shin. "You just lost your spot as my favorite trainer in training."

"I'm the only trainer in training, J." You reached out for the resistance band and made him take more into his grip. "Keep it tight and stretch slow. You'll get the most out of it that way."

Soft snickering behind you soon turned into a burst of laughter and you watched as Big Rig's attempt to hide a smirk, ultimately failed. You sighed and rolled your eyes, not needing to know who the laughter belonged to. "27-years-old and still acting like a pre-pubescent boy with an underdeveloped frontal lobe? Could only be you, Segs."

Tyler fake scoffed, bringing a hand to his chest and looking at you with hurt eyes. "I'm flattered you've managed to keep my age tucked away in that big brain of yours, but pre-pubescent? I figured baby Benn would have a much better insult than that."

"Oh, I have tons of better insults," sitting down in your chair, you picked up your book and smiled at him. "Just none that your baby brain would be able to even begin to comprehend."

His hurt look faded and he licked his top teeth, shaking his head and laughing. "You'd be very surprised at what this baby brain can understand."

You gasped, this time holding your hand to your chest and looking at him in wonder. "You mean that you're capable of having knowledge in anything besides Hockey and breasts?"

You heard the snap of Big Rig's resistance band echo as it flew off of his foot. The other guys stared at you in awe before laughing at Tyler. You raised a single eyebrow at your brother's best friend, daring him to snipe back at you. But when he opened his mouth, Jamie stepped in your vision, picking up Big Rig's resistance band. "Okay you two, stop bickering like some stupid lovesick teenagers." He tossed the resistance band at Big Rig and turned to you. "And please, I never want to hear the word breasts come out of your mouth again."

"I'm almost 22 Jamie, it's perfectly normal for–"

He held up a hand and shook his head. "For the sake of my ears, just...please, no bodily mentions. I'd just rather not have that in my head."

You sunk back down into your chair, as he went to grab a foam roller. Before looking back at your book, you peeked over the top of it to see Tyler stuffing a heating pad into his shirt, holding it firmly on his left shoulder. As if he could feel you staring, he looked up, resting his back against the wall and smirked, raising a single eyebrow before tapping his temple and mouthing "big brain."

You rolled your eyes and subtly cleared your throat and turned the page, using your middle finger that you made sure was perfectly within his line of vision. He laughed and covered it up with a cough before shaking his head and leaving the training room completely.

It was normal, dealing with the chirps of your brothers' teammates. You'd been around them for the last three years of your college education, only this time during your last year, you were working alongside them. It was a weird adjustment, going from seeing them in the corridors post-game, relaxing on the weekends at a bar to shadowing their athletic training staff during practices and games. When you mentioned your internship, Jamie didn't even bother to ask you if you wanted to shadow the Dallas Stars Athletic Trainers. Mainly because he knew you were too afraid to ask. So he just went up to Jim Nill and asked if you could do your internship there for the season and that was it.

That's how you got your internship.

You were grateful for the fact that your brother was able to help you get your foot in the door with this internship, which is why you did anything and everything that your 'bosses' asked. Whether it was replacing heating pads, washing the covers for them, changing the water in the heater– any grunt work, you did with no hesitation. And they appreciated seeing you so willing to learn what their day-to-day lives were like when they were on the job. Eventually, you went from doing grunt work to being able to tape up ankles, help with stretches, almost anything except for stitching. That, you weren't allowed to do.

The boys took you in as one of their own the moment most of them met you, your freshman year at SMU. It was easy to 'adopt' Chubb's little sister, as they so liked to put it. And the moment that you stepped foot into the training room with your official Dallas Stars polo, that's when the real fun began. Their jokes about you being 'Baby Benn' never seemed to end. You were often victim to their playful chirping and of course, they didn't bother to keep the language clean of innuendos are curse words. They knew that they didn't have to though, especially since you grew up with Jordie and Jamie Benn as your two older brothers. Not only had you'd grown up knowing what the Hockey atmosphere was like, but you could also give it right back to them.

And man, they loved it. Tyler, however, seemed to love it the most. Whether it was because he was Jamie's best friend or he just took a special interest in picking on you, you never figured it out. Besides Big Rig and Bishop, you were close to Tyler. Mainly, since he was Jamie's best friend, but also because of all of the ways he's helped you out in the last four years. He and Jamie moved you into your dorm room every year since freshman year. When they were on long roadies, Tyler paid you to come over and take care of the dogs, though you never took the money because playing with his three boys was like free therapy and his house was only a few minutes down the road. And if inclement weather forced you to evacuate campus and you didn't feel like staying on Jamie's fancy leather couch, Tyler offered you one of his many guest rooms. Though most of the time, you just took the couch at Jamie's.

Tyler may be your big brother's best friend so you've got to know him a little bit over the last few years...but if there was one thing you knew most about him, it was his womanizing reputation about Dallas. Hell, around anyplace he steps foot in. He knows he's a damn good hockey player, he knows that he's not exactly ugly and he's damn well aware of all of the women who'd love to say that they spent the night with Stanley Cup Champion, Tyler Seguin. And he doesn't care because like any 20-something male, he's getting laid and that's all that matters.

Which, you guess is why the two of you tend to butt heads and chirp at each other the most. You can't stand guys who bounce from girl to girl and he's just an ass. Especially since he always joins in whenever Jamie rags on your boyfriend of two years, Cole. For as long as you've been dating, Jamie and Tyler have refused to let up on the jokes involving his red-shirt senior status on the baseball team or his involvement in Beta Upsilon Chi. They'd always sneak in stupid frat jokes whenever they were around him, knowing that he'd probably never catch on. You couldn't rebuke them though, because well...Cole kind of was your stereotypical Frat bro. But you got enough of the negative comments from your dad and oldest brother whenever you were at home, you didn't want them to follow you down at school too.

Your ringtone blaring from your backpack that was hanging on the back of your chair tore you away from your textbook. When you put it down, you noticed that the training room was empty and their warm-up music was echoing softly from outside of the room. It happens sometimes, you getting so lost in your schoolwork that you just tend to zone out all noise. And you weren't needed out on the bench until game time anyway, so it was no wonder why Dave didn't bother to interrupt your reading.

You reached into your backpack and grabbed your phone, looking at the screen to see that Cole was calling. Pressing the green button, you brought the phone up to your ear and picked your book back up. "Hey, what's up?"

"Hey babe where are you?" His voice was being muffled by the loud music coming from his end of the call.

You laughed, turning another page. "I think the better question, is where are you?"

You could hear him talking to people in the background as the music overtook his side of the call. Ignoring it, you took a deep breath and sighed, re-reading over a paragraph. "What did you say?"

"I didn't say anything besides asking where you were."

The music and sounds of people mingling muffled on his side of the call, making it a little easier to hear him. "Oh I'm at the house, where are you? Are you almost ready to head over?"

Flipping another page, your focus starts to dwindle from Cole and more into your textbook. "Um, no? I'm at the arena for work."

"What do you mean? Why are you at the arena?" The muffled sound of music doesn't last much longer as it practically erupts through the speaker on your phone. He must have gone back into the pre-game.

You pull the phone away from your ear and check the time. Warm-ups shouldn't be ending for another five minutes, meaning nobody should be coming into the training room or the corridor anytime soon. You pressed the speaker and placed your phone onto the desk. "I'm working tonight, remember?"

"Uh, no? You never told me you were working tonight!" He yelled over the music, saying hi to more people as he traveled through the house no doubt. "You're supposed to be here in like, thirty minutes, Y/N. It's Beta Ball! You said you'd be here."

"Actually, no I didn't," you could feel yourself begin to get annoyed as you heard one of his friends offer him two shots. "I told you that I had to work. I even printed out a schedule and gave it to you, remember?"

The sound of him gulping down two shots echoed over your phone as he sighed in relief. "You didn't give me a damn schedule, Y/N."

Somewhere in the back of your mind, you were telling yourself to cut him some slack since he was obviously in the midst of pre-gaming. But another part of yourself just wanted to tell him you were busy and hang up the phone. Cole could care less about his schoolwork, only frat parties, preparing for his upcoming season and then getting drafted.

"I did give you a schedule, Cole. I gave it to you on Monday," you flipped another page, "which was four days ago."

The music started to muffle again, soon followed by the sound of a door shutting– muffling the music completely. "This party is a huge deal, Y/N. It's one of the biggest parties of the semester and if you're not here I'll look like a total fucking loser. It's the damn formal!"

You couldn't help but snort as his statement. "It's not the biggest party of the year, Cole. You're just drunk."

He must be stumbling around whatever room he's in because you can hear him bumping into things and stuff being thrown on the floor. It was surprising how bad his tolerance was, especially for being in a frat. "You're not even a real fucking trainer, why are you there?"

"It's my internship for my degree, Cole. Some of us care about getting a college education instead of worrying about what to wear to the next sleazy frat party," you chuckled to yourself, shaking your head. "So calm down the roid-rage and enjoy your party of the year."

"Are you fucking coming or are you too busy being a bitch errand-girl for your brother's shitty team?"

"Jesus Christ, Cole it's not even a real ball!" You yell, just as the sound of a door opening and closing echoes around you. "It's literally that stupid party where girls have to wear lingerie and the boys just spend their time ogling over them."

A wave of green rushed into the room, coming to a stop at the table closest to me. They pulled their warm-up jersey over their head before you could even make out who it was. But the moment you saw the fancy script of one familiar Stanley Cup tattoo, you knew who it was. You picked up the phone, taking it off of speaker bringing it back to your ear as he continued to dress down from his gear. "What? Have you contracted an itch from all of the girls you've been seeing?"

Tyler looked over at you and smiled, shaking his head as he kept undressing. "Don't enjoy the show too much."

"Seriously Y/N, it's super fucked up that you're not coming tonight! You owe it to me, I'm your fucking boyfriend!" His slurred voice must have been heard from your phone since Tyler looked over at you again with a raised eyebrow. "If you don't show up, we're done! You can take your shit a-and get lost."

"I need service, please," Tyler said, taking your attention away from the phone call and hopping up onto the table in nothing but his pants and his pads. He was sitting up straight and had his hands in his lap like he was a kindergartner waiting for storytime.

"Sorry Seguin, I don't provide the kind of service you're used to."

He rolled his eyes and kicked up both of his legs, taking off his sicks and shin pads. "Not that kind, the athletic training kind." His eyes moved over to the phone against your ear and then back at you. "Or are you too busy?"

"Is that a guy?" Cole slurred, his loud slurping from his new drink grossing you out. "Y/N, who the fuck are you with?"

The annoyance from the entire phone call was bubbling up until you couldn't take it anymore. "Listen, Cole, I need to go," you looked over at Tyler, setting down and closing your book. "I'm busy."

"Are you at least going to fucking try and come to the party instead of wasting away like an old maid?" You raised your eyebrows at his comment, your inner voice telling you to refrain from snapping at him.

And yet, it was hard not to feel guilty since you knew how important these frat parties were to Cole. You sighed and stood up from the chair. "Maybe after the game, I don't know."

He didn't even bother to reply to your response and instead, just hung up on you. You pulled the phone away from your ear and stared at it to see that he had, in fact, hung up on you. "Rejection hurts, huh?"

You rolled your eyes at Tyler's comment and placed the phone back down onto the desk, then making your way over to him. "Is there any reason why you just performed a half-assed strip show in the training room?"

"Oh no, that's not my strip show," Tyler laughed, wiggling his eyebrows up and down. "You'd know my strip show if you saw it. It leaves the ladies dripping."

"Why? Because they pissed themselves from laughing so hard?"

In true Tyler fashion, he rolled his eyes and stuck his feet up at you. "I need my ankles taped and don't worry, Dave said you could do it."

"A little late there, don't you think?" You asked, walking over to the cupboards that held every material you'd need. "Or is the Tyler Seguins' supposed big brain, not able to support memory?"

"Yeah, well I got distracted by your brother and his fawning over Katie...again."

You laughed, taking the basket with everything that you'd need back over to the table he was sitting on. "Ah, so you've been caught up on the drama?" You grabbed a stool and brought it to the end of the table, resting a knee on it as you nodded for him to scoot back and extend out his leg.

He leaned back on his hands, watching as you began to tape his ankle. "At this point, I think their relationship history could give lifetime at least three new movies."

"Lifetime movies, huh? Didn't take you to be the kind of guy to tune in to those." You focused on going through the appropriate steps, keeping your eyes on his ankle. "Maybe Hallmark, but definitely not Lifetime."

"Wow, you know so little about me, I'm hurt. Besides, their 'sucks to be sixteen' marathons are great." He brought his right knee up as you tapped the finished ankle before moving onto his left. "Let me guess, you love the Hallmark Christmas movies and you've never missed a single one?"

You looked up at him for a few seconds before looking back down and continuing to work on his ankle, not answering his question. He wiggled his foot, causing you to look back up at him. "Seguin, I swear to–"

"Ha! I knew it! You're a total sucker for those cheesy, romance Christmas movies."

"For your information," You meticulously started to wrap his ankle with the pre-wrap. "It's a family tradition, at least between my mom, my sister and me. Dad and the boys wouldn't be caught dead watching those." You paused, smiling for a second. "Unless it's the Candace Cameron-Bure ones. Jamie's a sucker for those."

A comfortable silence settled over as you finished up his ankle. When you tapped it, he sat up and pointed down at the floor. "Can you pick up my socks? I don't want to have to bend down to get them."

"Why, is Mr. 3% body-fat getting, dare I say..." you faked a gasp as you bent down to pick up his socks. "lazy?"

"No," he swung a sock out at you, missing you by a few inches before bending over to put it back on as you walked over and placed some tape down for him to use. "So Cole..."

"Ugh, can we please not talk about him?" You groaned, putting the basket back into the cupboard. "I swear our that phone call gave me a migraine, so I don't need to hear your jokes."

"No, not that." he put on both shin guards before moving on to fixing his socks. "I just...does he always talk to you like that?"

"Like what?"

"Oh I don't know, let me think," He put the tape down next to him before, getting off of the table. "Does, ‘are you fucking coming or are you too busy being a bitch errand-girl for your brother's shitty team?’ sound familiar?"

You stopped in front of the desk, looking at him and feeling your embarrassment start to take over. "Y-You heard that?"

He nodded his head towards the door and reached down for his skates, putting them back on. "So does he? Talk to you like that?"

You realized how cliche it would seem if you told Tyler that it was only when Cole was drunk, that he talked to you that way. But the last six months of your relationship had been a little hostile. Senior year was a pressure on both of you, but Cole seemed to be wearing it far worse than you. "He was drunk, what does it matter?"

"It matters because I have two younger sisters and I know for a fact that if one of their shitty boyfriends talked to them that way, he'd end up in an ER bed." He stood up off of the table and turned to pick up his warm-up jersey.

"Well good thing you're not my brother then, huh?" You joked, expecting him to make a comment back at you.

Instead, he looked a little lost in thought before he shook himself out of it, smiling at you. "Doesn't mean I still wouldn't put frat boy Cole in an ER bed."

You walked around the desk, plopping down into your chair as the murmuring of voices from down the hall echoed from the hallway. "Better get going, don't want to be late for the meeting."

"Yeah, I guess," Tyler tossed his jersey over his shoulder and headed towards the door, stopping in front of it. "Are you going tonight? To that party...with Cole?"

You looked up from your book, caught off guard by his question and the way he said it. For a moment, if you weren't convincing yourself that you were delusional. You'd think that Tyler looked...concerned or maybe even a bit genuinely curious about your nighttime plans.

You shrugged your shoulders, picking the book back up. "I don't know, maybe. There's usually some lingerie contest at this thing and the winner gets a $100 tab to some bar downtown, so maybe if I leave here in time."

You made sure to pay attention to the way he reacted to your response. His features darkened a little bit before he turned away from you walking out of the training room. You returned back to your book, only to be interrupted by someone clearing their throat. When you looked up, you saw Tyler leaning back in, a smile on his face. "Any chance I can get some pics?"

You threw the empty roll of tape on your desk in his direction and he ducked out of the way, laughing all the way down the hallway. "BYE Tyler!" You called out, returning back to your textbook.

As your eyes skimmed the words that your brain failed to absorb, a smile crept onto your face as you looked back up into the empty doorway. "No," you said, shaking your head and closing your eyes, following it with a deep breath. "No, absolutely not. Do not go there."

When you opened your eyes, a small sinking gut feeling took over when you looked into the empty hallway. Part of you wanted Tyler to reappear in the doorway with his goofy grin. But he wasn't there, and neither was his stupid request for lingerie pictures or his...amazingly stupid abs. What bothered you the most though, wasn't the fact that he wasn't standing there...but what he meant by his request.

Did he want lingerie pictures of the other contestants...or of you?

#tyler seguin imagine #tyler seguin oneshot #tyler seguin writing #dallas stars imagine #dallas stars oneshot #dallas stars writing #nhl writing #nhl oneshot #nhl imagine #hockey writing #hockey imagine #hockey oneshot #ldyk fic #my writing

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pennylogue · 5 years

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theory about the pink!white we see in the opening

was talking with @fanfoolishness re: steven’s controlling tendencies, mind control powers, diamond parallels, diamond mode, and what it would take for him to realize how bad he’s getting, and an idea emerged.

…what if he possesses white diamond, and that’s what’s going on in the opening? and that’s what finally makes him take a step back and realize how bad he’s gotten?

steven’s mind-control powers, until now, have always been the most objectionable part of his power set…and also the least explored aspect. we’ve seen him astral project a handful of times, but we’ve only seen him possess a non-watermelon person once, with lars.

but we’re learning more steven and pink’s offensive abilities, and they tap into steven’s current issues in some very thematic way. and there’s no way that’s a coincidence, especially when steven got his possession powers like two season ago and never really explored them.

diamond powered tantrums and mind control abilities for the sweet kid with some serious repressed anger issues and controlling tendencies. ho boy. diamond mode is going to amp up the pressure cooker. steven’s going to feel like he has to repress his emotions even further, and that’s going to manifest in a hair-trigger that he has even less control over, and it’s probably going to screw up his fusions as well.

but the mind control stuff? that’s a whole nother, very worrying kettle of fish for someone whose motivations in the past four episodes have been a cocktail of:

1. do this thing i think is good for you because i know better than you

2. let’s just completely ignore how badly what i’m doing is messing with me and my family cause i don’t want to hurt these strangers’ feelings, and no matter what happens i’m going to refuse to listen to anybody and stick to the plan until i physically and mentally cannot take it

3. SHUT UP SHUT UP JUST LET ME FIX THIS SO I DON’T HAVE TO THINK ABOUT ALL THE TERRIBLE THINGS MY MOM DID THAT I CAN’T STOP FEELING GUILTY ABOUT

and the worst part? steven is so unaware of all of this. he’s entirely lacking in perspective. he admits in 1.02 that it was wrong for him to just take over the project, he doesn’t know why he thought this was a good idea. and then he just goes right back to doing the same thing in the following episodes, anyway. (This post by @sweetfaerycherry has some interesting insight plus a few more thoughts from me on how steven’s lingering programming as a diamond could be an influence, since as 1.02 and literally all of canon have shown us, gems have a difficult time divorcing themselves from their original purpose.)

so what would it take for him to go too far? what would finally get through to him?

imagine white diamond wants to do something that is either bad, or that steven perceives as bad. considering their history and that she’s…you know, white diamond, i think she’s one of the few people steven could justify purposely mind controlling to himself. this would have serious thematic importance, considering this would be the first time steven has employed the gem- controlling abilities (the zap, emotions, puppetry) the diamonds all share on a gem, and white so far has been the only diamond who’s had the chutzpah or power to use her abilities effectively on other diamonds. so steven controlling white diamond? um…that would layer onto what happened in cym in some very interesting ways.

so let’s say steven tries to persuade her that she’s wrong, but she won’t listen to him, why won’t anybody listen, he’s NOT useless, he’s just trying to help, he helped everyone before and he still can, he knows what to do, why won’t they just listen? and so? he deliberately possesses her. and everything’s fine, nbd–

except blue and yellow find out what’s going on. and are horrified.

i think that could make him snap. as his “steven-knows-best” gets so bad he literally controls the body of an ex god-empress of a space empire, having the diamonds call him out would hit him where it hurts and pierce right through like nothing else. when ex-dictators that you reformed are going “hey steven you might wanna step back and chill”…yeah. i think that would definitely snap him out of it in a “what am i doing, how could i do this, what have i become” sort of way.

i mean, pink diamond parallels are brutal enough–and the controlling tendencies are definitely something pink had as well, they’re something that all diamonds share–but white diamond parallels? fucking save him.

(as this excellent post by @askfordoodles points out, repressing emotions because everything needs to be fine and micromanaging everybody because you know best are very much white diamond traits. and um…

“I can’t deal with one more horrible thing she did, okay? I don’t want to hear about it, I don’t even want to think about it! I just want to fix it!”

sure, there’s pink in there…along with yellow and white. and tell me that doesn’t sound like white’s determination to be Fine, Everything is Fine, because as Long As Everything Is Fine you don’t have to think about how Not Fine things are.)

so, what happens after that? well, at first i was thinking that that shot in the opening could be steven struggling for control with white, but now i’m not so sure.

look at that stance. doesn’t that look…well, like steven, currently in the middle of a meltdown? clutching at his head is a big freaking-out steven thing. from CYM, we have the same posture exactly, and coincidentally(?) a similar palette:

and from volleyball:

what if it’s steven, horrified by this revelation, going diamond mode inside white’s body? the only collateral damage worse than a normal diamond powered breakdown, after all, would be if he was in the body of a lady the size of a skyscraper and his and white’s powers were combined.

where does this lead to? well, it depends on what it’s coming from. steven might be on homeworld for a routine visit, or he might be there because some serious shit went down in beach city with his family and connie, and he wants to put himself as far away from it as possible. they might not even be on homeworld–the diamonds and spinel could be visiting! and let’s face it, if any of the crystal gems, greg, jasper, connie, etc., were around for this and saw steven acting like this, i think it would go even more poorly. they’d try to get through his thick head, but he’d be so unstable and horrified they likely wouldn’t make much progress, and if he accidentally hurt them in the middle of his freakout?! that would absolutely destroy him.

so yeah! basically, some real interesting parallels between steven and the diamonds going on, and i think finally really focusing on conscious use of his mind control abilities would tap into one of steven’s biggest flaws this season and allow him to realize how bad he’s gotten.

(and since corruption theory is so popular, might as well address it: i don’t think this is necessarily incompatible with corruption! steven could be undergoing a slow corruption while this happens and/or or this could be one of the final straws that pushes him over the edge into all-out corruption.)

#su #steven universe #su future #steven universe future #su theory #su spoilers #meta #fun with diamond parallels #someone please help this boy

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bboppinmoxis · 5 years

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Ugly Heart. Anyways, today was my first day back from my staycation with Kenneth, and it was really fun. I got to work on bar and be an actual barista (after five months I can finally be trusted to be alone!) And according to the schedule, I'm gonna be there my entire shift! Yay! Well, in comes Smithers and for a while everything is chill. I bitch about him a lot but I don't hate the guy. He just is bad at his job which makes the rest of us suffer and he just does not listen ( I seriously can not count how many times he has called me Love and my response is always "My name is not Love. Please stop giving me pet names." I know it's a silly thing to some but not to me. I tell him every time. I know it's a habit and he does is to a lot of us, but it's only the girls so it's not like he can't control it. So the main reason I'm annoyed today is because I was super excited about being on bar for my whole shift but he asks me to go on customer support for a coworkers lunch. Nbd because he says I can be back on bar when said coworker comes back. Well, coworker comes back and instead of going back to the bar, Smithers puts me in the back doing dishes. Also not a big deal normally except for the fact, that is not what he said half an hour ago. After a bit he comes back there to ask if I'm okay to which I respond:

Me: Other than being annoyed I'm fine.

Smithers: is there anything I can do?

Me: Yeah, you could not lie to me about going back on bar and putting me somewhere else instead. (A lie is a stretch, I know but I'm aggrivated so whatever.)

Smithers: I didn't lie. There are a lot of people here right now and we need the dishes done.

Me: I know, but what was the point in asking me where I want to be, and then ignoring what I asked for?

Smithers: The plan changed. It changes all the time.

Me: Then what's the point in telling me anything if you're just gonna change your mind everytime?

Smithers: the gm wanted me to make sure you guys are in the loop.

Me: Yes, I understand that. What I am saying, is that defeats the purpose of telling me in the first place. Not to mention, you knew how bad I wanted to be on bar. But it's fine. You wanted me to tell you when I'm annoyed with you so I will. I'm annoyed. So I'm gonna finish these dishes and go home.

Smithers: I can switch you with another coworker

Me: You are missing the point here. Don't get my hopes up, and then act confused as to why I'm irritated. I've told you. I don't know what else you want me to say.

Smithers: Well you said you don't like working the front. <-( I don't understand what this had to do with anything but okay?)

Then he asks me to scrub the drains, in my dress, even though that is a deep clean chore done over night? I did it but he said I can do it if I want to. What does that mean? Who wants to clean that thing? I did mostly because I want to stay my full shift but I still ended up clocking out early. So it was pointless.

My biggest problem is no matter how honest and clear I am, he either has a million excuses, or is defensive, or doesn't acknowledge the conversation the next time we interact.

I love my job but he makes it so frustrating. This is coming from a long list of bullshit but I just wanted to get this off my chest. Like, my first day back? Really?

#smithers #bad management #bad managers #personal #vent #vent post #conflict #bitching #complaining

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bright-haired-teacher · 6 years

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unrelated to teaching but ranty so

moved in with my best friend last month and like, we’ve been friends for ages and we’re like... almost dating (it’s complicated and that’s not the point of this post so i’ll leave it)... suffice to say we are close. we do a lot of things together and we’ve always spent a ton of time together so living together was not really a big deal

anyway i moved into his house. again nbd, except... it is.

because the like, bare minimum shit i’ve asked for him to do around here to help me make space for my stuff (much of which is still just out and polluting our living spaces) just isn’t getting done. he was gonna clean out the closet in the 2nd bedroom for me so i’d have a place for a lot of my things - mostly clothes but also some of my crocheting. he was gonna do that before i move in. which was at the end of september, btw... it’s late october and did he ever clean the closet? no, so i took it upon myself because i can’t live out of a fucking suitcase indefinitely. no one can.

but there’s a ton of crap i just put in a laundry basket for now and i asked him, “hey, just go through this stuff and find a place for it, okay?” and he was like “yeah, sure.” except he never did. this was like a month ago. almost. and that basket is still sitting there.

there’s also still stuff in the closet that i can’t get out until i have that basket free again because hey, we actually do need our laundry baskets, you know? and i can’t keep putting random shit in them for him to fucking finally decide he’s gonna take care of them.

then there’s the shelf he said he’d clear because he wants to get rid of it.

okay.

so.

do that then??? bc i’d toss the shelf out in the street right now if i fucking could.

so when i asked him when he was gonna do stuff, he kind of apologized and said, “i’m lazy.” well BITCH ME TOO BUT I’M STILL DOING AT LEAST SOMETHING, AT LEAST MEET ME FUCKING HALFWAY. THAT BACK BEDROOM WAS SUPPOSED TO BE MY SPACE SO I COULD SET UP MY COMPUTER AND STREAMING AND I CAN’T DO THAT WITH ALL THE SHIT THAT’S STILL IN THERE. I MISS MY PC. MY LAPTOP IS OKAY BUT IT ISN’T NEARLY AS POWERFUL AS MY PC AND I WOULD LIKE TO PLAY WoW AGAIN SOMETIME FUCKING SOON.

anyway we went out of town this weekend and while we were out, his dad (who stays here every other weekend bc he’s a truck driver) moved the furniture in the bedroom the way i’ve been begging my roommate to do for... the entire time i’ve been here. it obviously wasn’t that difficult and the two of us could have done it easily! but he never wanted to! and his 70 year old dad did it BY HIMSELF ON HIS WEEKEND.

i mean, thank you very much too because that also included my dresser which i was finally able to start loading again so i was able to put three huge bags of stuff away and that felt good.

but like. can you. please. meet. me. halfway.

and so get this. he was like “you can just toss stuff if you want. i’m not emotionally attached to anything.” except i know that’s not true. i bet if it was stuff you shared with your mom before she passed? you’d be pissed if i ditched that. and i’m not comfortable going through and tossing someone else’s stuff. i struggle enough to toss student work lol.

so anyway. here’s what i’m going to do. i’m going to get a ton of bins. the biggest ones i can buy. and then i’m gonna start shoving all of his shit that he’s got lying around in them. and then i’m going to load up my truck and toss them all in my storage unit, which (conveniently) only i have the key for. and if he wants to go through it, he can make a copy of the key to the padlock and go over there and do it himself.

but.

I SHOULDN’T HAVE TO BE THE ONE TO DO ALL OF THIS. IT ISN’T MY JOB. AND I’M SUPER FUCKING RESENTFUL RIGHT NOW THAT IT’S ALL FALLING ON ME.

i thought this move would be great. we’ve been close and i thought hey, maybe we’ll get closer and start dating again or whatever but like. this has turned me completely off of wanting to do that. i’m already considering saving up and continuing to build my credit so i can just like... buy my own house and then i won’t have these problems anymore.

i mean unless, of course, he can get his shit together and clean up after himself and deal with his shit for once in his life, but since it seems entirely apparent that he cant, i’m just gonna fucking do my own thing which i was perfectly content doing for the past 15 years of my life anyway.

bc the entire reason he asked me to move in? bc his dad wants to retire and the only way his dad can pay down his debt and afford to retire was to take a second mortgage on the house, which my friend can’t afford on his own. we are splitting the bills 50/50 but i make quite a bit more than him (lmao and on a teacher salary) and so yeah, he quite literally needs me but i do not for even one second need him and i’m starting to feel quite a serious lack where my sympathy should be. so. there’s that.

anyway. i’m done ranting for now. i think.

#personal #probably save your time and energy #but i feel better because i've needed to get this out #and even if no one reads it i'll have felt like i was heard #so thank you #even if all you do is read the tags lmao

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beaversatemygrandma · 3 years

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Bluh less than a week left of being here. I was able to hang out with two people this month and because everybody is working idk if i’ll be able to see anyone else at all. So that sucks. Haven’t seen them in a while anyways so it’s okay i guess. Not like anyone checked in through the pandemic except like maybe three of them.

I’ll make new ones after i move and get a new job and now that i’m vaxxed i guess. ;-; And then the ordeal of packing and moving. The most stressful part. I’ve moved literally five times in my life and every time I’ve hated every second of making the whole change. Can’t get used to it. Never have. Ugh.

Most disappointed about probably not being able to do one thing with the one person who kept in contact no matter what after we stopped working together. And ya know that whole shockingly mutual crush. Anyways we were going to go to the springs before i left if they got a day off in time where there weren’t any previous plans and now that it’s less than a week before i go, i guess it’ll have to wait until i visit FL again a while from now. Tho I did run past a hypothetical future situation and it was actually considered. Like after their kinda shitty roommate moves out and I’m done with my business in NC, I’ll likely move in with them. I think it would be a nice situation to have. We know we get along more than well enough, we’ve been basically fighting against work an unlucky situations for time together which rarely happens, but when it does it’s always great, when their roommate doesn’t guilt them out of leaving the house... Also i finally had the full conversation about the gender things we’ve both been going through and, im so happy for them, they’ve already gotten hormone therapy set up and it’s been settled, we definitely are both nb which is neat. Wasn’t expecting that out of when we first met. I just secretly hope their voice doesn’t change too much, it’s not terribly deep or anything, just sounds so nice. Soft and literally makes me melt. ...ahhhh im gonna send a text and see if there really is no time this week. Maybe see if i can at least sneak in one last random adventure or something if we can’t do the day trip.

Geez i don’t wanna leave people behind but i think already accidentally did when i needed like five months of no interactions to recover from the burnout that was the last two years of high school topped off with three years of working a shit deadend job where i was underpaid, underappreciated and depressed as shit trying to pay rent and barely being able to afford food. I’m mostly okay now. Yeah, i need to treat this anxiety and adhd like last year, and finally take classes and go back to school and idk get a damn car. I just wish there was more to do here and i was able to stick around more. But now that I’ve got enough money sitting in the savings to get that car, pay off those medical debts (still bitter because it was $900 for NOTHING but just existing in the ER, it’s down to 700 but STILL.) and probably take some classes at a community college (this will wipe out that whole $10k but still. It’s possible.) I’m gonna get stuck with taking care of a 12yo (the eldest daughter complex is gonna come back but at least it won’t be like it was with my mom and taking care of her dad and dealing with the fucked up parts of her side of the family, I think it’ll just be split between me and my grandma when my dad isn’t around) nbd tho that kid needs a sibling around. And then likely downloading tinder again and being that person looking for people to hang out with and show me the area bc i haven’t been there since i was 8. Going back to the hometown i don’t even know my way around lol. Could be fun, might find other people who are similar in the city. It’s a real city with places that are hopefully not filled to the brim with rednecks. Its NC, so i can’t really guarantee it for myself, but still much less seeing as it’s a big city. Could be fun. Could be fun. Just not emotionally prepared for New.

Six days and counting. Oh boy.

#beavers speaks #moving nerves #currently sitting on the bed surrounded by all the plushies that wont fit into the tubs i have for those #but ye six more days ugh

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puncromancer · 7 years

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work rant no need to read

made it the restaurant after only minorly fucking up because the quickest way was this dinky little road that was like 0.1 seconds after the freeway so i didn’t notice it until i passed it by so i had to go like the slightly longer way and then gps wanted me to do a uturn into a busy rush hour traffic street so i just pulled in somewhere else turned around in that parking lot and just waiting 2 minutes for a kind soul to let me in.

then it was cold as fuck so i was waiting in the car at the restaurant but it was packed and idk what any of my coworkers drive so apparently after a few minutes they were waiting on me but they don’t have my number but my boss found my car and tapped on my window.

then my boss was like you’ve been here before right? and i was like nope not ever. and he was like oh then you should go first and i was very ??? bc if anything i should go last so i can see how they order their food. bc it’s a bbq joint but you ask for the kind of meat you want and then they weigh it and you get whatever fixings you want for free except some special things like the fruit salad. and then i got to the end of the line and i’m paying for my food and as i’m like signing the receipt my coworker shows up and is like hey you know the company’s paying for this right? but i’d already paid so i was like yeah whatever nbd and my boss was like uh it’s okay i’ll approve your expense report for this and i was like it’s like 20 bucks it’s not that big a deal. but he insisted. but like none of this would have happened if he didn’t make me go first?

but the food was really good and then they wanted to go to a bar afterwards, one guy left instead and tbh main street in coppell is really pretty. it was mostly the two of them talking over beer but i had some really good watermelon iced tea and i guess it was a good bonding moment.

other than that the driving to both places wasn’t too bad my phone was working p well. and the drive back was good bc it was like 8pm and there was no traffic.

also at the bar they both asked if i’d heard anything about being hired permanently instead of as a temp and i told them both that i got an email from hr saying i’d be eligible for some benefits next year but still have temp status and i was kinda pissed about that bc i honestly deserve to be fully hired with full benefits and a fuckin raise by now. coworker said they were completely taking advantage of me with that temp bullshit and my boss said he’s been trying to convince them to hire me full time and that he’s got my back so that was really nice.

but the temp thing is bullshit bc like the pay was nice when this was my other job and i was doing jack fucking shit all day but now i’m doing like three jobs here and i’m constantly taking on more and more responsibilities for the same pay i started with. and like tbh it’s p much the same as what i was making at toysrus. except like rn it would be seasonal right now and i’d be overworked there but making a lot more money rn. working here is only better bc its not as stressful and i don’t have to work holidays but i have a consistent schedule. like at toysrus after season i’d get like 20-30 hours a week maybe. it’d pick up a bit by spring but for most of the year they’d schedule me for like 30-39 hours so that i’d be technically part time instead of full time. but during season i’d be bumped back to a supervisor position with a bump in pay plus basically all the overtime i could ever want. so like overnights were objectively terrible but i’d be making a lot of money right now. but here i get 50 hours a week every week. which is nice. and like people here keep saying that temps aren’t supposed to even work 40 hours a week and i’m putting in overtime on top of that anyway but like yeah

this turned into an entirely different rant and i’m sorry about that

#personal #liveblogging work #money for ts ////#long post #incredibly sorry if you're on mobile #just me ranting no need to read

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ccjonghyun-blog · 7 years

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excuse me i’m v emotional bc cc is back and i’ve gotten the chance to join in on the fun and everyone’s so sweet ilu u guys... anyways...... hey whats up hello im the miss bringing in both this man right here as well as sir yongguk. ig i’ll roll onto that account too to post an intro post and get plots going but pls!! let us plot my friends!! HERE is his profile page, HERE is his bio, and HERE is the most blandest plots page ever made but it’s a place to start ( lmk if anything interests you guys, just send me a msg wanting to claim it ). anyways i'm also on twt @ongwrites, and i’ll list some pointers below but send an im, or like this post if you’d like to plot!!

league VP ( one of the two ) right here folks, he worked hard to get here

became a hero in 2014, his bro was a hero for like 1-2 months before he died/was killed/is in coma... its complicated and explained in his bio, his weapon is a longbow

he’s also a resistance hero so u know... he rmbrs most of ya dying and carries your anguish and screams on his shoulders / in his dreams, nbd tho

so far he doesn’t have any cards in this timeline so u know... if u wanna plot smth w that... hmu friends... 0/3 spots filled

his family used to be all dead (bc of 2 sep. incidents) except for his big sis but luckily he got his lil bro back this time around too and his other big bro didnt become a familiar this time and is just sleeping the days away in a coma (thus jonghyun is often at the hospital, by his side, bc he’s the one that killed him in the 1st timeline and feels guilty... the usual)

he’s in his last year in uni and coaches soccer to middle-school kids, bc he finds it easy getting along w children considering he helped raise his lil bro&sis

what else do i say

tbh he’s a lot like shiro from voltron

he’s basically rly nice and can be a big bro type figure to anyone, he just rly hates losing ppl, flashbacks to 1st timeline deaths

even tho he’s happier this time around and believes in saving those he can etc, he deals with a lot of dark thoughts and self-doubt and honestly need a hug but he won’t tell anyone that.... so hard getting him to open abt himself as he often changes the topic to how everyone else is doing instead

team dont kill taeyong

and ok idk what else to say

#( * OOC )#( * INTRO )

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canadian-riddler · 7 years

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Alright I was asked so here’s why I didn’t like W*nder W*man. I do not want discourse about how I’m obviously wrong.

- The ending was bad. They could have made an amazing point about how some people just do the wrong thing but some people just do the right thing, and they went and screwed it up with a boss fight with the Big Bad.

- Steve had Diana do something he didn’t know she could do and the same way she’d already done it, as if he’d seen her (the thing with the shield).

- All the side characters could have been written out and nothing would have changed. Etta was largely useless, especially since her one contribution was telling them the Germans were practically right where they were already. Sameer, comedy relief but largely useless. Scottish guy had a great setup with the PTSD but they never resolved it. Chief had the one use in setting off the smoke signals. None of these characters (with the exception of Chief, since he’s some character named Napi I don’t know anything about) are going to appear in the sequel so they got shafted. Bad writing.

- The Amazons know hundreds of languages but have never been to the outside world with which to learn of their existence or their etymology.

- The Amazons were created to help protect the humans from Ares, and then when he crops up again they’re like ‘nah we’re gonna hide out here’.

- The movie was apparently about how badass and independent women can be. All it told me was that gods can fuck around in the world however they like and I don’t have a say because they’re controlling me anyways.

- So many awkward ‘here’s why men are awful’ scenes. Why make such a huge deal over why he didn’t want to sleep next to her? He’s just trying to be a gentleman! “They were FRIENDS, Indy, men get all awkward about sleeping next to their FRIENDS.” They were NOT friends. They had just met like an hour ago. And half of what they talked about was sex. After having just met. That’s definitely what I talk about when I’ve just met people.

- Diana was more shook up about the death of Steve who she just met two days ago than she was about the death of Antiope personally taking a bullet in front of her.

- Diana weirdly gets confused over babies (which do not exist on Paradise Island so how does she know about them) and ice cream and revolving doors but has no interest in how guns work (i.e. the weapon that killed her aunt, she the mighty warrior doesn’t think that might be useful?), is unfazed by cars and airplanes, and easily navigates various structures that don’t exist where she comes from. That is, she’s naive when it’s convenient for the plot or comedy.

- I believe she’s an example of the ‘born sexy yesterday’ trope which I thought we didn’t like. I’m not gonna look it up right now though.

- Every other man drooling over how babealicious she was. That’s feminism apparently, to tell a babealicious woman how babealicious she is every ten minutes.

- Her refusal to listen to anything any man said = strong female character. Somehow. Sorry, but she was walking around in a world she knew zero about and acting as though the people who lived there were idiots. That’s foolish and it made me dislike her.

- The No Man’s Land scene was the big reveal, obviously, but it lessens the fact that there were real soldiers stuck there for a year because they didn’t happen to be demigoddesses with magical shields to storm the front with. It felt hollow to me.

- Personally did not see any chemistry at all between Steve and Diana. This might not be anything to do with the movie at all and more about the fact that it takes amazing acting for me to believe two people have chemistry.

- I was point-blank confused about the part he told her he loved her. She didn’t hear him because her ears were ringing from the explosion. They then repeated the same scene with what he said included. So she did hear him? How did she magically figure out what he said? If she heard him, what was the point in pretending she didn’t in the first place?

- Dr Poison is apparently an actual person in the comics they changed wildly. I forget how. Diana does not kill her because... only men are allowed to kill women in this movie. "She had just understood love and sacrifice Indy!” No. It was a way to avoid having Diana kill a woman. They should have killed her, because they can’t use her again in the future anyway. Additionally, Diana killed everybody else nbd.

- I was very disappointed and had a much better time drinking a mint mocha frappucino on the bus home than I did during the movie.

#so says Indy #negative post #I don't want to argue about this #I've seen the side about how great it was for weeks now and I simply don't see it that way #this is a post about why I didn't like W*nder W*man #seriously if you don't want to know don't read it

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fmlfpl · 6 years

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Lineup Lamentations - GW29 - Alon Wildcard Edition

Our Transfers, Captains, and Starting 11s for the week.

LATE AS FUCK ALON ON WILDCARD EDITION... hopefully still interesting to read even if it’s this late. What do you think of Alon’s team???

WALSH

TRANSFERS:

OUT: Patrício and Jiménez

IN: Heaton and Callum Wilson

Operation fuck Wolves off to hell begins a week earlier than I had anticipated. Of course Rui is dropped because why wouldn't he be dropped the gobshite. I don't have enough in the bank to get any GK except for Boruc which feels like a potential disaster waiting to happen. Bego was bad but they've been bad lately so who knows if he keeps his place over the next handful of fixtures. Not a place I want to be... I don't really care about losing Jim this weekend since they are shit and I hate him. Getting rid of guys I hate to guys I don't hate will at least make me feel happy...I think. Gambling on Howe the liar here a bit, but I'll be benching Callum this weekend anyway and will just hope that he's on the bench which would position him well to start next GW at Huddy. This effectively kills any plan to get Higz in but so be it. I think this is my best play.

GK:

Heaton (CRY)

NOT RUI!!!!! YES! Tom unfortunately goes against my team but it's still a relatively decent on paper home fixture and they have had great underlying defensive stats since he came back into the team. And I love him. Go on Tom you beauty.

DEF:

Robertson (eve)

Robbo the hero is an easy start. Not much to say about the boy.

Lascelles (whu)

Jamaal has a bit of a tricky one away to Wet Spam but not really going to overthink it and roll him out while they are on song.

Wan-Bissaka (bur)

Finally, 1b is back baby and straight into my XI. Not a great fixture but fucking fuck me if you think I'm starting Bennett instead of him. Not going to happen ever again.

MID:

Salah & Mané (eve)

All my money still in mid on display this weekend. Mo and Mane remain and it's silly to expect anything other than Livp completely doing Everton on Sunday. Maybe they will score 5 and Mo won't blank. Would be novel.

Son (ARS)

Private corporal Suon is a lad I will remain patient with. Don't know what to expect in the NLD but he's still a quality player and can bang in any game. Not expecting a ton but he still feels fine.

Pogba (SOU)

Paul has a home banker and should be good for some points.

Sterling (bou)

Finally, Raz goes to his favorite place on earth, Bournemouth in what should be a bloodbath. Raz has low key started 1 game in the last 4 gameweeks so...he owes us.

FWD:

Rondón (whu) & Barnes (CRY)

Running out big Sal and Smashley this weekend. Was originally planning to bench Barnes for Jim but the transfers forced my hand. Not expecting loads from these two this weekend but the fixtures aren't diabolical so who knows. Seems fine.

BENCH:

Bennett (CAR)

Wilson (mci)

Chambo (lol)

CAP:

Sterling (bou)

Raz obv. Rested and ready to fuck. Go get 'em Razzybaby.

ALON

TRANSFERS:

A MILLION TRANSFERS VIA WILDCARD

GK:

Heaton (CRY)

I went with Tom... Was on Alisson for a lot of tinkering, was on Ederson for a bit of tinkering, and eventually it came down to Dubravka and Boruc vs. Tom and Guaita and I went with the latter.. the fixtures in my opinion and underlying stats for Burnley (Burnley 4th in NPxGA since Heaton returned and Newc are for 15th in same period), are both a lot better then Newcastle, and Burnley 100% don’t blank in GW33 like Dubravka might do... Also I love the synergy with Guaita where A. I will bench Tom in GW30 when he goes to Anfield and Guaita is home to Brighton in their derby, and B. if Palace beat Watford in the cup then Palace will have a double in GW35 and that will be nice for me to have a doubling GK without having to make a transfer for it!

For this week Palace have been buozzin around a bit scoring some goals with Bats in and Wilf back to his old ways but I’m hoping at home Burnley can maybe do a job or at least rack up saves.

DEF:

Trent & Matip (eve)

Made sure that I was at least doubling up Liverpool defense and here we are now, entertain us... I don’t think that Trent needs any sort of WC explaining at all so skipping the scouse legend and onto the very under the radar Matip... Very quietly Matip has started 6 straight in the league (more if you include other comps) and is looking good in a partnership with VVD. He’s even looking dangerous on some set plays and some runs forward (like that dribble vs. Man. United)!... As for Gomez Klopp said the earliest he would come back is after the intl. break which would be GW32 when I’m FHing anyway, and Lovren should be back to training after this GW but I do not think that Matip will just straight up get dropped for no reason to go back to Lovren with this long of a spell out for Lovern and in for Joel... If I do need to get rid of Joel in GW33 or GW34 or GW35 then I will either go to the Liverpool CB who took his place or I will go to a defender who doubles in GW35 and both of those things are very easy to do.

Love the Joel pick and can’t wait for him to score vs. Everton to really hammer home how good a pick he is. Double Liv defensively every week is fantastic and in the derby it’s no different.

Luiz (ful)

This spot (let’s be honest, every spot) was also back and forth between different guys... A little Chilwell a little bit of this a little bit of that I don’t know... Settled on Luiz who we shouted on pod as simply just a really good pick for the rest of the season. In GW34 Chelsea are at Anfield and in GW36 they are at Old Trafford and every other match (and they don’t blank) is a good cleanable fixture. Luiz is a very solid pick and I’m happy to be on board there.

This week they get to go fuck Fulham sideways... Maybe new manager bounce will Fulham dudes titting and totting at Craven Cottage but meh, if Chelsea can just pay attention for 90′ they should keep an easy clean and destroy Fulham.

Lejeune (whu)

And Lejeune one of four dudes to actually stay in my team from the pre-wildcard lineup and that’s because he does a great job and has pretty decent fixtures and might not blank in GW33, does not blank in GW31.

Not the best of fixtures this week away to Hammers but they are still pretty damn injured and they are a bit outta form, West Ham... I’m hoping Newc can keep their good defensive form up and put in another cleanie. I’m starting Lejeune over Brooks (who may not start and has City) so hopefully it pays off. Go on Newc.

MID:

Salah (eve)

Easy Mo, I think ya gotta keep him in the end even with the derby usually being scrappy and low scoring I still think Mo is just a great pick with the fixture run and will repay the faith as he always does eventually... And one other thing we didn’t mention on pod that I was talking about all day on Slack and other pods backed me up is that despite a Mo blanking on a 5 goal day for Liverpool - he was fucking brilliant. Had an absolutely terrific match in progressing the ball, buildup, taking on their shitty LB, hockey assists, he hit the post, all that shit... Just not FPL stuff. Hopefully can build on the uptick of form and take his chances this time.

Sterling (bou)

Raz back was one of the key cogs on why or why not I was gonna WC and here we are. Raz the fuck in. Rested last week should be straight back into starting 11 this week and flying as per usual against garbage ass Bourney.

Pogba (SOU)

Kept Paul as well. Mainly because of this fixture this week, phenomenal fixture. And then I’ll start figuring out how and when to deal with him and his blanks... in my plans right now it will be Paul and Kun out for Haz and Higs on GW31 but we’ll see.

FWD:

Aguero (bou)

Kun in I mean. How could I not get Kun....??!??!? Yeah he might get rested this week but it’s still Bourney so 30ish minutes is still very much on for points for him and then next week on a full week rest he has home Watford and is the by far standout captain for that. The form and sex appeal are too much to ignore for me.

Barnes (CRY)

Template guy, non-blanker, extremely good numbers, mostly good fixtures. Not much thinking here.

Palace are tough and get AWB back but they’ll still be starting some fuck face next to Tomkins whether it’s Kelly or Dann to exploit. Not the same tight ship as before.

Rondón (whu)

Another big template bandwagonny guy he’s just good and also mostly has good fixtures. No blank in GW31 and maybe a blank in GW33 but NBD if he does I have plenty of guys. It’s gonna be great.

West Ham’s defense is diabolical so I’m hoping they continue to be themselves and Sal pops off. But Newc away vs. Newc home is a very different kettle of fish so we’ll have to see what’s up.

BENCH:

Brooks (MCI)

I like Brooksy a lot and 5.0 is an absolute joke of a price... Even though he rides the pine this week, Bournemouth have the best fixtures from GW30 through the end of the season of any team in the league. Absurd run and Brooks will hopefully keep titting in there.

McNeil (CRY)

Despite getting subbed early last week - for a cheap 5th mid spot who doesn’t blank in 31 or 33 McNeil is still by far the best from where I’m sitting... He’s been bright and should keep getting chances to make stuff happen. Good kid.

Schindler (BHA)

Piece of shit gets to stay in my team... That’s just the way the cookie crumbles........ Schindy is the cheapest nailed guy who doesn’t blank in GW31 or GW33. That’s it. Just cheap, just nailed, and otherwise a bad pick. There is literally nothing else that you need to know about Schindy and Huddy.

And backup keeper Guaita (bur)

Like I wrote in the Tom section he fits really well with Heaton so I’m very happy to combine the two there. And he’s still dirt cheap... Even though Palace defense should be slightly worse with no Mama it’s still pretty good and definitely capable of getting some cleans with the way Woy sets’em up so, yeah, ok, get in there. Back on the Guaita train...

CAP:

Sterling (bou)

Easy Raz easy life. This should be a thrashing and Raz should be nailed for this week. Didn’t really consider anybody ahead of Raz.

#FML FPL #FMLFPL #FPL #Fantasy Premier League #Wildcard #Lineup Lamentations

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fanforfanatic · 7 years

Text

As You’re Told - FOUR

Relationships: Castiel x Reader Rating: Smut Warnings: Dom/sub, bdsm A/N: Orgasms occur this time!

~8000 words

Summary: You start dating Castiel, a famous physicist, when you get hired at the same university as him. A few months into the relationship, you explore dom/sub dynamics within your sex lives.

Read it on ao3

Chapters on tumblr: ONE TWO THREE FOUR FIVE SIX

Chapter FOUR

You lock the door after him and let out a massive breath. You lean on the wall for a little while, waiting for the shit storm to hit. Waiting for the panic. For the embarrassment. For the What the fuck just happened? It doesn’t come. You wonder if it’s normal that you liked what you and Cas did so much. If it’s normal to enjoy- not just enjoy but relish- following orders as much as you did. But that’s the extent of the ramifications.

You’ve had wilder sex than this. Hell, you’ve had wilder sex than this with Cas. Hell, you didn’t really even get to the sex part. It was freaking frottage at the most. But. But. It was so intense. Every little thing felt massive, felt like the only thing, until the next thing. Then, that became the only thing.

You were nervous (really fucking nervous) in the beginning, but it definitely got easier. You hadn’t been able to get up from your chair when he first asked you to, but by the end you were under his damn thumb. (Your hand drifts to your left breast, then, though you don’t feel it through the thickness of the robe.) When you managed to do what Cas asked of you, it made the next task less daunting. At some point you stopped even thinking about it but you think that had more to do with how much you wanted to come. Probably.

You sigh again. No trainwreck for now. To keep it that way you know that you need to avoid thinking of just how pathetic you were at times. Begging and pleading, choking on your own words.

“Nope nope nope. Not going there.”

You trudge to the kitchen, realising just how thirsty you are and down a glass of water. You fill it up again, waiting patiently for the water distributor in the refrigerator door. You take another few sips and leave it on the counter.

You go find your discarded clothes next. You pull on your jeans, forgoing underwear, and smell the shirt you had borrowed from Cas. It didn’t smell like sex or sweat or debauchery like you thought it might but you decide to get a fresh one anyway. You head back to the bathroom, the one that’s in Cas’ room and, once you pick up your panties and Cas’ underwear from the floor, drop them and the t-shirt in the laundry basket. You hang up the bathrobe and return to the bedroom.

You put on the bra you’d had yesterday and go to his dresser. The undershirts (and the socks) are in the second drawer. You open the first. The sight of the toys is too much too fast and has you slamming the drawer shut. You’re not a fucking prude, okay? You own toys. You didn’t feel embarrassed when you went and bought them in the store (ordering online is for wimps). You dirty talk as much as the next guy. Better. You really have a mouth on you when you get going in general. You’re a rambler. An excessive talker. That transfers into sex.

Usually.

You had your tongue caught in your throat with Cas earlier today, because it’s not the same. It’s just not. Cas wanted you to say things and it was so out there. Not the words being said, but the saying of the words. Usually, when you’re saying the nasty while doing the nasty, you don’t see the other person staring at you like they’re holding back from ravaging you. Usually your head is pressed into a pillow where the words are muffled and your eyes are closed. Or the other person’s head is between your legs and you’re not maintaining constant eye contact. Usually, you’re so far gone by the time your lips get loose that you can’t be bothered feeling embarrassed. Can’t be bothered filtering any of it. It was different this morning, though.

Just like these toys are different. These toys aren’t in an old shoebox under your bed. They aren’t the alternative to your hand. These toys are full of Cas. Hand picked by Cas. Thoughtful and careful choices made by Cas. Rebuilt my collection , he’d said. He placed them here, in this drawer that has dividers. He organised them, probably re organised them when all the dildos didn’t fit in one section, decided to put the butt plugs there instead or some other arbitrary shit that happens when people are figuring out storage. Point is these are Cas’ . Meaning, he wanted to use them on someone in very specific ways and now he wants to use them on you. And you’re going to let him. You’re going to let him.

So, yeah, these toys are different and it’s a little hard to look at them. The world can bite your sweet ass.

You open the drawer again, just an inch and peek inside. There’s so many things in here, it’s full to the damn brim. You open the drawer more fully and force yourself to stare inside until you can stop your muscles from clenching. You don’t really take in most of what’s in there. You’re just- Exposure therapy. That’s what you’re doing, you realise. With a huff (once you’ve unclenched all your muscles), you close the drawer once more. You don’t need to be practicing psychology on yourself.

Except maybe you do. Shrugging on a new t-shirt from the second drawer you say, “I want you to touch me.”

Walking back to the kitchen you say, “Fuck me, Cas.”

After a sip of water you say, “Fuck me, Cas, please.” And then, “Please fuck me, Cas?” You wonder if there’s a grammatical preference for the order of the words. You shrug and head to the coat stand with your water. You’d left your satchel bag at the base of it, last night.

“Yes, I want you to take my underwear off. Yes, I want to stop being such a fucking loser. Would I like to not suck? Sure!”

You plop down onto the couch and pull your computer from your bag. You get about an hour of work done, taking care of the grades first, then diving into the powerpoint. You are the newest member of the faculty, at least as far as the physics department is concerned, so you get a lot of the tasks the people with seniority don’t want. Like hosting a seminar for confused freshmen who haven’t declared their major. You don’t mind it so much. You figure everyone’s gotta pay their dues.

After that first hour, you have to consciously stop yourself from researching dominant and submissive relationships. Information is power, but information can also get inside your head. Well, obviously that’s where information goes, but, whatever, you get what you mean.

You think what you glimpsed while filling out the checklist is enough to tide you over. You know that you can ask Cas questions, in any case, and he probably has trustworthy resources if ever you want to delve in deeper. Jumping blindly nerves first in the wild sea of the internet is not something you’re interested in doing when it comes to this. Still, you end up having to stop yourself from doing exactly that at least four times.

It’s when you’re trying not to cave for the fifth time that Cas decides to text you, like the saviour that he is.

How are you feeling?

About what we did?

We’ll talk about that in person. How r u feeling rn?

I’m good? You type out.

Cas got weird after Charlie called and at the time your mind was sluggish so you hadn’t caught on, but you know now that Cas was doing aftercare. Which is sweet, really, but unnecessary. You weren’t going to have that thing that subs have where they feel wonky after a scene, because you aren’t a real sub. Besides, you guys barely did anything, it probably doesn’t happen even to real subs unless there’s actual sex involved.

You continue typing: Nbd. Getting hungry, you gonna be here for lunch?

Cas’ answer is immediate. Nbd??

No big deal, old man

So you’re alright?

Yes sir :p ;) You follow up with, food?

I’m gonna be another two hours at least. Eat w/o me

Is the part.acc. data retrieved?

Working on it :( And then, Should be fine tho. What are you doing?

Procrastinating, because im a model prof

You feel up to doing something for me? It can wait til im home

You swallow. Are you up for it? Before, Cas was there to reassure you every time you thought you were in over your head. Cas isn’t here now. Then again, that also means you could freak out privately. And Cas’ eyes on you was thirty percent of the struggle.

Baby? It’s nbd :P we can wait

Shoot

Ur sure?

You type: yeah, bruh, hit me with your best shot. You erase it and type: Wouldn’t say that I am if- You erase it and type: Im sure cas

Ur perfect

I want you to go the dresser and open the first drawer

Take every single toy in your hands and decide if you’d like it used on you

Make a no pile on the bed

Pick the one from the yeses you’d like to try first and put it on top of the dresser.

You stare at the onslaught of texts for a minute. Or two. Or maybe a whole fucking year goes by. Absentmindedly, you turn the sound of your phone off, in case Cas decides to go on another texting spree.

Do you understand?

Yea cas

Would you like to wait for me?

You picture it for a moment, Cas sitting on the bed, grinning at you while you go through each and every item, probably as red as a tomato.

Should I feel insulted?

Extremely so. I prefer when youre not around, i just rly like ur place

You’re cruel

Gottago deans got smt

Be good.

“Fuck,” You mutter, rubbing a palm against your left boob. “You be good, asshole.”

You shove your computer away like it’s what’s offended you and rise to your feet. In a Great Act Of Defiance, you decide to eat before doing what Cas asked. You’re a real rebel, alright.

You eat peanut butter on toast. You like that if the bread is hot enough the peanut butter melts a little. Then you eat one of the cannoli. And an apple. And a banana. And the leftover blueberries from breakfast. In fact, only once you’ve divested the kitchen of fruit (Castiel doesn’t keep junk at his place), do you go to the bedroom.

It mocks you. The drawer. It’s telling you that you’re a chicken shit and it’s right. You don’t need to be doing this. There’s literally no reason for you to do this. Expect that Cas told you to.

You sigh. You signed up for this. You don’t regret it, either. You enjoyed it this morning. You know that you did. So just shut your whore mouth and get rid of the toys that freak you out. Christ, it’s not nuclear physics.

Honestly, it’d be easier if it were.

After your pep talk, things go relatively smooth. You start with the buttplugs because that’s simple enough, you’d discussed them first during the checklist. You toss the largest one he’s got on the bed because you’re not interested in dying. It’s the same for the dildos but you also remove one of the smaller ones, just because you don’t like the shape.

Once you do that, the rest feels like more of the same. You pick up each vibrator and then put them back down, trying not to feel silly for picking up the ones you’re sure you’ll keeping just by looking at them. You continue through the rest of the gizmos and gadgets calmly, only squirming when you get flooded with ideas of just how Cas might want to use them. It’s almost therapeutic.

As far as bondage items go, you get rid of everything that has patent leather because you don’t like how shiny it is and how very sex club dominatrix queen (or something) it looks. There’s enough of the matt leather that you don’t think it’ll be a problem. You get rid of the rubber restraints that are so stiff you think they’d cut into your skin. You get rid of the cuffs that have fuzzy fur on them, even if its softness surprises you. If you’re going to be tied up you want it to be with classy stuff. Not something tacky even if you can tell that the cuffs are really good quality.

You get rid of the actual whip he has. Kinky, fucker. You get rid of a small pizza cutter style knife that has blunt points. You get rid of a wooden ruler because if Cas wants to do a professor role play so help you God. (You put the ruler back in the drawer.) You get rid of a gag that’s shaped like a penis and after a bit of hesitation you keep the ring gag.

Despite the healthy pile of things you did take out, what’s left outnumbers it by far. You’re about to close the drawer, but something gnaws at you. You leave the room only to return with post-its and a pen, all stolen from Cas’ desk. You write maybe on one and stick it on the ring gag. You write never before on another and stick it on magnetic spheres that mostly confuse you. You write out one more post it for the compartment of nipple clamps: Can’t really tell how intense these are, so we can work our way up? You black out the question mark because it’s not really a question, you decide.

You return the supplies to their places and settle on the couch again. Still, something gnaws at you. You go back to the drawer and remove the maybe post-it from the ring gag. You’d said on the checklist that you weren’t sure about it and you trust Cas to keep that in mind. This time, when you return to the couch, it’s with a deeply satisfied feeling.

The indicator on your phone flashes and you find you have texts and two missed calls from Cas.

20 minutes ago: How’s it going?

19 minutes ago: Are we having fun yet? ;)

10 minutes ago: Baby, I need you to tell me you’re alright

7 minutes ago: Answer me, now.

5 minutes ago: I’m going to call, pick up.

4 minutes ago: I need you to pick up, alright?

2 minutes ago: Im on my way

“Shit.” You click on the icon of a telephone at the top of the text conversation and listen to it ring once before Cas answers.

“ Thank, fuck. Are you okay? What are you feeling? ”

“Cas, I’m fine, seriously. I was, euh, I was, doing the thing, and I left my phone in the living room. No need to rush back.”

There’s an audible sigh of relief on his end of the line and it sounds like he slows down.

“I’m sorry, I freaked you out, Cas.” You say, guilt creeping up your spine. You had started to feel like you wouldn’t fuck up and yet…

“ I’m on my way .”

“Cas, I swear I’m fine.”

“ We’re almost done here. The rest is pretty technical, anyway, so I’m going to leave Dean and Charlie to it. I’m fifteen minutes out. ”

“A-Are you upset with me?” You just- you need to know. Need to prepare yourself.

“ What? No? Baby, no . I’m just- I’ll be there soon, okay? ”

“Okay, Cas.”

It’s barely ten minutes later that you hear the jingle of his keys outside. He doesn’t waste time at the door, dropping his bag, kicking his shoes off and slinging his coat in the general vicinity of the stand somehow all at once. Then he’s beside you on the couch, taking the water out of your hands, placing it on the table, and gathering you in his arms.

After a moment he pulls back so he can watch your face, which he holds in two large hands, while he asks, “How are you, baby?”

You grin at him. “Cas, I’m good. I see what you’re doing and, honestly, it’s overkill.” You all but stick your tongue out at him.

Cas searches your face for anything that might ring false. When he’s satisfied that you’re alright, he lets go of you and his eyes narrow playfully. “Overkill, huh?”

“Mhmm, if you’re not careful you’re going to drive me away with all this affection.”

“Is that so?”

“Yea-”

He pulls you onto his lap so that you’re straddling him (again). The position turns your entire body on like some kind of pavlovian effect. Jesus, even the dog needed more than one run through.

You kiss, gently, then hard, then gently again and your arms wrap around his neck like they belong there.

“I was thinking about you all day.” He says.

“Liar. You were probably running around like a chicken with its head cut off worrying about the experiment.”

“That’s true but my mind kept being tugged back to this pesky thing I left at home.”

“Pesky? And here I thought I was just unbearable.”

He kisses you. “You’re both.”

“You’re very good to put up with me, then.” You kiss him.

“That’s also true. What I want to know is if you were good for me.”

Everything changes, then. His eyes are on yours, just like usually, and his voice is the same as ever, but it’s different. You take a deep breath. You can do this. You practiced like a loser. They’re just words.

“I was.” You say.

“You were what?”

You don’t even glare this time. You don’t huff in annoyance. You don’t even call him a prick in your own head. You just take another breath and say, “I was good.” And then, “For you.”

Cas’ heart fucking pounds out of his chest and breaks a rib on the way. “Show me.”

You lead the way to the bedroom, your hand in his as he trails behind you. You steal a few furtive glances over your shoulder and sometimes you’re met with soft eyes, other times with a look of mischief.

He settles you on the bed and spreads out your no pile. Your heart is racing and you think Cas hears it because he grips the back of your neck, tilts your head up, and kisses you. He goes back to examining what’s laid out but he doesn’t question any of it. When he’s done he scoops it all up in a canvas bag he gets from and returns to his closet.

Next he opens the drawer and you know the huff of laughter is from the post-its. Of course, he thinks, you’re nothing if not thorough.

He looks around the room, after that. The sun beams through the two windows on either side of the bed. They’re narrow but start at the floor and go all the way to the ceiling so the light floods in easily. For a moment you wonder if he’s trying to choose what he wants to fuck you on. The space is minimally furnished so you don’t think it’ll take him too long to decide.

“Take out your phone.” He says from his place by the dresser, his tone serious, reprimanding.

“I- What?” Your brain short circuits. Did you screw up? No, you did good. You know you did, you picked up every single thing in that drawer and-

“Take out your phone.” He repeats, still stern but patient.

“Okay, yeah, okay.” You lean back, somewhat, to pull it out of your pocket and hold it out to him. What’s he going to do? Take a picture of the drawer and send it to everyone you know? Look at all the things she wants used on her. Of course he doesn’t want to do that. This is Cas. Not a creature straight out of purgatory.

Cas shakes his head at you. “Open it and go to our texts.”

Your hands move of their own accord.

“Read the instructions I sent you.”

“Okay?” You say, scrolling up. “You’re-” perfect. “I want you to go to the dresser and open the first drawer. Take every single toy in your hands and decide if yo- you’d like it,” You clear your throat, consider shooting Cas a pleading look, but ultimately continue, “If you’d like it u-used on you. Make a no pile on the bed. Pick the one from the yes -”

You stop, eyes wide and on Cas. “Cas, I-”

“Finish reading.” His eyes have darkened and he looks like a brewing storm in the sunny room.

“I- Okay,” You sigh. “P-pick the one from the yes es you’d like to try first and put it on top of the dresser.”

“Did you do that?”

“No,” You say, looking down at the floor.

“Did you do what you were told?”

You meet his eyes and whimper, “No, Cas.”

“Do you have an explanation?”

You’d forgotten but you say, “I, um, I just wanted you today?”

Cas’ demeanor steels even more. “Did you just lie to me?”

“What? No! I mean yes- I mean I didn’t mean to- I- I’m sorry, Cas, I didn’t, I…” You trail off but by then you’ve crossed the room and plastered yourself to him. “I’m sorry.” You say again.

There’s a moment where Cas doesn’t say anything. It’s because he’s reeling a bit. You’ve taken to this so much more than he could have imagined, even if you’re still struggling with that fact internally. You can’t tell, though. In fact when Cas doesn’t say anything, you think you’ve really gone and ruined things.

Before you can spiral too much, Cas pets your hair and says, “It’s okay.”

He moves you away, even as you’re reluctant to give into his hands, so he can look at you.

“It’s okay, even good girls make mistakes, okay?” He’s gentle but very much in control.

You bristle. You don’t want to hear good gir- those words right now. “I’m sorry.” You repeat.

“I know you are.” With a grin that soothes you more than anything else has, he says, “We’re going to find a way for you to apologise alright?”

You nod. “Okay, Cas.”

“Okay,” He echoes then turns you both so he’s behind you, hands on your shoulders, and you’re facing the drawer. “Open it.”

You rush to comply.

“Good.” He squeezes your shoulders. “Now, pick the first toy you’d like to try.”

You nod but you don’t move. You don’t know what the right choice is. You don’t want to take something too safe, in case he thinks it’s a sign that you’re not all in. Because you are all in , you realise. You also don’t want to take something too-

“I’m going to repeat something I told you earlier, alright? Wrong answers are the ones that are lies and the ones you give because you think they’re what I want to hear. Am I making myself clear?”

“Yes, Cas.”

He kisses the top of your head. “Pick the toy you’d like to try first.”

You take out a pair of leather cuffs. You don’t necessarily prefer them over everything else, but it’s a place you feel comfortable starting. You place them on the dresser, just like the original instructions had said and you hear Cas grunt softly behind you. He presses his body against yours and you feel him, half hard.

“You’re perfect,” He whispers in your ear making you tremble in his hands.

“M’not.”

Cas turns you so that you face him and firmly says, “I decide.”

You don’t know what to do, but you’re not about to argue with him. “Okay, Cas.”

“Good. Kiss me.”

You asked him just that earlier today but right now Cas is telling you. So you do the only thing you can do and kiss him.

When he pulls away, he steps back from you entirely. “Lift your shirt up.”

You grunt. “Cas, not again.”

He grins at you, glad that you’ve shaken your slump. “I’m not going to ask you again.”

“Fine.” You lift up your shirt so that you’re holding it under your chin.

“What’s this? No, no, that won’t do.” Cas looks almost offended to see the undergarment. “Take it off and take your bra off. Now.”

“Fuck yeah,” You half cheer, tossing your shirt to the ground followed by your simple white bra. You move your hands to the button of your pants but wait, expectantly looking at Cas.

He laughs. “Are we eager, babe?”

“We’re horny, babe. ”

“Take ‘em off.” He says.

“Yes, Sir .” You say sarcastically, dropping and kicking your pants off faster than you knew you could.

Cas would be impressed, if he wasn’t so distracted by the fact that you aren’t wearing underwear. And if his eyes weren’t narrowing at you for giving him lip.

He stalks over, very much how a predator would, and places his hands on either side of you, flat against the still-open drawer. He slides it shut backing you up against the dresser.

He leans down so his lips are near your ear, just a breath away from brushing against it. “You already have two things to apologise for,” He says, his voice deep, rough. “Do you want to make it three?”

You’re completely naked between the tweed clad arms of this handsome man who isn’t touching you but who is so so close it’s making you a little dizzy.

You say, “No, Cas.”

“Get on the bed, on your back.”

You expect Cas to watch you obey, he’s always watching you, but he shrugs off his jacket and walks into his closet instead.

You wait patiently once you’re settled. Well, you don’t really ever settle, placing your hands by your sides and then on your stomach and then by your sides, again, but you wait. You’re rewarded for it because when Cas steps out of the closet, he’s sans sweater, the top buttons of his dress shirt undone, and he’s rolling up his second sleeve, exposing his forearms and looking so damn good it might be a sin. It’s got your hips shifting involuntarily and you decide you’re going to ask the Human and Legal Resources at the school if it’s at least against the law to look so damn good.

If you missed Cas’ eyes before, which you realise that you did, you don’t anymore because they’re on you now, intent as ever. He moves to stand by the foot of the bed and places the tip of a finger in the crook just behind the knob of your ankle.

He watches your face while he drags just the tip of his finger up over the curve of your calf. He watches you bite- chew- your lip as his finger dips in where the back of your knee does. He watches your lashes flutter from trying to keep your eyes open- he loves that he doesn’t even have to tell you to- while he traces the shape of your thigh.

He glances down, just for a second, to see the way his finger presses into your flesh. Then, he’s right back to watching your face as your breath hitches because his finger is making its way up your body but also towards the center of it. Not enough, though. Not there. He smirks at you like the cat who got the creme tapping your hip bone twice almost chastising you for your dirty thoughts.

He follows the curve of your hip, of your waist, of the mound of your left breast. He circles your nipple once, twice, and it either hardens or it had already puckered. You don’t know. You’re not sure you care. You just want to be touched.

Cas knows, so he touches you. He pinches your nipple but there’s no bite. It’s more like he’s holding it between his thumb and forefinger and it’s weird but mostly it’s not enough.

“Cas,” You breathe out.

“Tell me, which toy you chose to have used on you first.”

Does he have to use all the fucking words? Is he trying to make you self combust? He could have said what did you pick or which item did you choose, but nooo Cas has to go and be an asshole. Asshole .

“You saw what I- Leather c-cuffs, leather cuffs!” You’re quick to rectify when cas squeezes your nipple.

Your hips buck off the bed and your heels dig into the mattress and you expect Cas to let go but he just continues to hold your nipple with the same pressure.

“Ask me.”

“W-wha-” He squeezes just a little harder and jesus fucking christ you feel it between your legs. “Alright! Okay, jeez. Cuff me- fuck. ” The pressure increases more as he twists his fingers this time. It’s a little painful but it’s mostly not and that’s freaking you out. “Please u-use the leather cuffs to r-restrain me.” You say, writhing all the while and Cas only has the tips of two fingers on you. Not even in you.

“To what?”

“What? Cas I don’t know, I don’t know okay, that’s,” You inhale because you haven’t been getting all the oxygen you need. “That’s my real answer, okay? I don’t- Whatever you want. Cuff me to whatever you want. I don’t care. ”

“Hmm.” Cas ponders for a moment, eyes on yours. “No.”

He steps back, taking his touch along with him and you want it back as torturous as it was. He goes to the dresser and puts the cuffs away.

“You disobeyed me earlier so you don’t get the help. You’re going to have to restrain yourself.”

He’s back by your side when he says, “Arms up, hold the headboard.”

Your hands fly over your head, your fingers gripping the wood of the bed frame.

Cas brushes the back of his fingers over your cheek. “You’re going to be good for me, aren’t you?”

You choke a little but you sigh out, “Yeah, Cas.”

Cas moves away from you again but this time it’s to climb between your legs. He bends them at the knees and spreads them, making one hang off the bed. Then, very true to character, Cas looks.

He stares and when you squirm and try to close your thighs to try to hide yourself from his gaze, he holds them open.

“You won’t move.” He says without even glancing up. “You’ll let me look at you for as long as I’d like.”

“Why?” You complain and you hate how whiny you sound.

He grins then, sparing you a once over. “Because I want to and because I said so.”

His hand drifts up your thigh in a feathery touch, but when he presses his thumb between your lips to pull one to the side it’s with a contrasting firmness. You fidget at the feeling and Cas’ other hand smacks your thigh, packing a bit of sting.

“What? I kept my legs open.” The words come out of your mouth and you feel like a whore in a brothel saying them.

“I told you not to move.”

“Like at all?” Your eyes widen. “How am I supposed to do that with you touching me and- and looking at me like that.”

He shrugs.

“Cas, c’mon, you’re killing me here.”

He hums and says, “ La petite mort.”

“What?”

Cas moves his thumb so it’s right against your entrance and tugs gently at the rim.

You sigh, enjoying the sensation and trying to keep your hips from participating.

Cas pushes the tip of his thumb, not even to the first knuckle, just inside of you.

You breathe deliberately. It feels good, he’s giving you so little but it feels good.

“Cas,” You moan, a quiet little moan.

Cas wishes he’d already taken his pants off altogether but settles for undoing them with deft fingers, giving his straining erection some room.

He pulls his thumb out and you barely manage a grunt of disapproval before he’s pushing it back in, maybe a millimeter deeper than before. He rubs it along your opening and the slow pace of it all is absolutely maddening. Which you tell him.

“This isn’t just punishment, Cas. It’s damn torture.”

Cas looks away from where he’s working you over to give you a deceivingly confused look that’s all too knowing. “This isn’t punishment at all.”

“W-what? What do you mean?”

“This is your apology. I won’t be punishing you this time.” The hand on your thigh squeezes warningly. “Don’t think I’ll be as generous with my leniency beyond this point. I won’t tolerate you lying to me.” As an afterthought, because it is the lesser infraction in his eyes, he adds, “And I expect you to do as you’re told and not forget a task when you’re given clear directions.”

You nod a little too willfully. “But… Cas what you’re doing…”

He swivels his thumb and you just manage to keep from using your leverage on the headboard to take him in deeper.

“Are you not enjoying yourself?”

“No, I- I am, but-”

“Then it isn’t punishment.”

You nod, gasping as Cas draws his thumb out then pushes back in again and again, fucking you with it. Your chest heaves making it so that if Cas couldn’t hear your breathing, he can now see it. This time, when Cas pulls his thumb out, he glides it upwards to land and press on your clit.

“ Fuck. ” Your hips rolls, chasing the pleasure as sharp as it was.

There’s nothing for your hips to meet, though, because Cas’ hand is gone.

“No,” He says. “Don’t move.”

“I won’t, I won’t.” You make promises you don’t know you can keep.

His thumb returns to your clit but he also sinks his pointer finger into you. He goes so goddamn slow the feel of him is more agonising than not. You want more, you want so much more.

“Good,” He says when your only movement is the tremors of your body.

His thumb rolls your clit at a calm and steady pace but with varying pressure. The finger inside you doesn’t move at all. At first, it’s okay. At first, what he gives you is enough, you struggle to remain still, but it’s enough. You murmur to Cas that it feels so good and that he always touches so well . He’s got you panting and he’s got you forgetting to be embarrassed about it.

Then, minutes pass, however many, and you find yourself needing more. Needing anything more. You find yourself begging Cas quietly.

“Please, please, please, Cas, please, I- please. ”

Cas needs to physically restrain himself because seeing you like this does things to him. “Tell me what you want.”

“I want you to move, I want- please, Cas.” You thrash your head to the side, to keep from thrashing your hips, and press your face into the cool pillow.

So Cas moves but it’s as unhurried as everything else he’s done. He drags his index out, pressing along your upper wall all the while, then nudges it back in. Over and over and over and you can’t.

“ No, ” Cas snaps, taking his hand away and slapping your mound with it. It shocks you more than anything else but has you writhing on the sheets letting out a low groan nonetheless. Cas smacks your thigh this time, getting some of your wetness on it. His voice is deeper than usual, which you hadn’t thought was entirely possible. “I told you not to move.”

“I know, I’m sorry.” You gasp when you manage to calm yourself. “I am, I’m sorry, Cas.”

“You asked me to fuck you with my finger, correct?”

Your breath hitches. “Yeah, Cas.”

“And what did I do?”

“It?” Even as you say the word you know it isn’t enough so when Cas raises an unamused brow at you, you shift and mumble, “You fucked me with your finger.”

“And what did I ask you?”

“To not move.”

“Did you do that?”

You shake your head but seeing Cas’ hand lift you quickly say, “No, I didn’t.”

His hand falls gently back to you, even rubs your thigh soothingly, spreading more of your slick onto your skin. You shiver beneath him.

“So you understand then, that you can’t be getting what you want, right?”

You suspect the question is rhetorical, but you don’t really end up pondering because Cas returns his hand to your pussy, thumb toying with your clit and finger buried inside of you. It seems contradictory to his words but when he doesn’t move inside of you, you get it.

“Cas, please.” You whisper. You strain your muscles to keep from shifting.

“Hmm? You want something?” He leans over you to place a teasing kiss on your lips.

“You know I do, come on, Cas.”

His tongue finds your right- right! - nipple.

“Cas please,” You take a deep breath. Cas likes it when you use words? You’ll give him words. “Finger me, Cas.”

He gives your breast a peck before leaning back. “That’s not going to be enough, sweetheart.”

“I won’t move, Cas. I promise. I’ll be- I’ll be-”

Cas smirks at you, his thumb unrelenting in its lazy circling of your clit. His other hand leaves your thigh to push his pants and boxer down enough so he can grasp his cock and stroke it leisurely. The sight has you moaning and purposefully not moving. Cas does feel you contract around his finger though and he lets out a small laugh.

“You’re so needy, baby. You’re desperate for it aren’t you?”

“ Yes, Castiel. ”

His full name on your lips is a rarity and it has Cas grunting out a fuck as he picks up the pace of the hand on his dick. The hand on you keeps torturing you just as slowly.

“What will you do to get it, hm? What are you going to do for me?”

You’re shaking now, but it’s a tremor that Cas can’t fault you for. “Anything, Cas.”

“Will you stay still for me?”

“ Yes. ”

“Good.”

This time, Cas fucks you. His finger thrusts in and out of you at a rhythm that can get you there. A rhythm that builds you up and up with the help of his thumb still sparking pleasure out of you.

To help you not fuck up into his hand you chant his name, you probably cuss him out a little too, you might pray to God once or twice. Your fingers dig into the wood above your head and you think this is how beds are broken. You keep your eyes on Cas the whole time. Either locked with his or following the movement of his hand on his leaking cock.

Cas stops fingering you exactly once. It’s a horrible moment where you think you might have moved despite your best efforts and now Cas won’t give you more, won’t make you come. It’s a brief moment, though, and Cas just ends up pushing two fingers from the hand that had been working himself into you, curling them and going right back to his dick, using your wetness to slicken the way.

It’s so hot, it’s so fucking hot that your entire body flares up. Your clit fucking twitches. Then the hand that had been on you all along comes back. He uses two fingers to pump into your pussy and you only feel the stretch a little because of how soaked you are, but it’s enough, hurts just right.

“You’re going to come,” Cas says, as if you were possibly unaware. “I don’t want you to worry about-” He pauses to moan. “About moving when you do.”

You don’t even manage a full nod before your orgasm overtakes you. It’s a good one too, the kind that you think might be fading but then peaks again. Cas is saying something all the while but it’s only when you come down that you tune into the words.

“-so good. Look so good. Feel so good. So good for me. Fucking, perfect. You’re- fuck! ”

Cas comes too, mostly on your stomach, some of it on your breast.

He leans back on his heels in his kneeling position to catch his breath but once he does his eyes are on you. You smile lazily up at him, still basking in the afterglow. Cas moves up your body, gives your left nipple a lick picking up a drop of come, then kisses you.

After a few moments, he slumps beside you and tugs you into his arms, bringing yours down, unbothered by the come he’s smearing between you. “You did such a good job, baby.” He tells you. “How are you feeling?” He brushes his fingers along your back soothingly.

You’re still sporting a silly grin when you tell him, “Really good.”

“That’s right, you did really good.”

You knock his shoulder with barely any force. “No, Ass, I feel good. That’s what happens after you get off.”

“That is the general course of action.”

You can’t be bothered with thinking up a retort and simply nuzzle into his arms. “You did really good, too, Cas”

The hand at your back stutters for a fraction of a second. “Thank you,” He says.

You push yourself up to your forearms and you’re honest-to-god impressed that they don’t give out under you because your entire body feels like jello. “I mean it. Since this morning, you were really patient and I appreciate that.”

He kisses you, long and soft and then he says, “You want another shower?”

“Yes, please, but I don’t want to get my hair wet again.”

You two lay there for a long while before moving to get cleaned up.

Later, Cas lays on the bed in boxers, his arm slung above his head. The sight of him is distracting, all long lines and taut muscles stretched out along the mattress, so you focus on getting yourself dressed.

“Have you seen my socks,” You ask as soon as you’ve buttoned your jeans, bending down to pick up your bra and t-shirt.

“I put them in your boots last night, right before we went to sleep.” True, they’d been scattered in your haste to get in each other’s pants.

“Cool, thanks.”

Castiel watches you slip your clothing on and almost audibly grunts in objection. There’s a little bruising on your left nipple and it looks so good on you. He wonders if it’s too early for rules like no bras in the house .

“We need to talk.” He tells you, sitting up.

You’re tucking Cas’ undershirt in your pants when he says this. You look up at him curiously and tap the first drawer of the dresser behind you. “About this?”

“Yes, about how it was for you.”

“Didn’t we already have this conversation?” You glide over to him, sit on the bed, one foot tucked under you and the other on the floor, mirroring him. You’re close enough that he can place his hands on your hips so he does. “You said it was good, I said it was good.”

“I think we’re a little more clear headed now, I want to make sure that’s still how you feel about it. I want to know if you’re interested in doing it again, in pursuing this further.”

You grin at him. “I’m very,” You push him onto his back, again. “Very.” You straddle his hips. “Very.” You kiss his lips. “Interested.”

He grins back at you. “In that case…” Cas flips the two of you, so that he’s the one doing the straddling.

“No, no,” You laugh, smiling the kind of smile you can’t suppress. “I gotta get going, Cas.”

He lifts his head from where he’s kissing your neck and frowns. “You’re leaving?”

“Gotta. Singer wants a diagnostic report on the latest variable shift by wednesday and I’ve barely started looking at the results from the last test run. Files are back home too.”

Cas leans down so his body presses into yours more firmly. “Let me ask again, give you a chance to change your mind. You’re leaving?”

You chuckle and crane your neck to peck him. “Yeah, Cas.”

He grunts and rolls off of you so you can get up.

“I have to go water my elephant ear, too, it’s been a few days.”

Cas sits up quickly. “You’re supposed to keep the soil of that plant damp at all times.”

“Huh,” You say with a teasing look. “Guess you aren’t the botanical expert you fancy yourself after all. In the winter, they say to let it dry out for rest periods. Something about fertilization, or whatever. I researched it.”

Your studio is nothing like Cas’ place. The entire thing could fit in his bedroom. It’s ill lit with the one window and the hanging overlight that seems to perpetually be swinging at least a little. Whatever light does get in gets swallowed by the exposed brick of the walls.

The window is directly across your front door. Below it, there’s a low and wide filing cabinet that you also use as a side table. To the left there’s your bed and at its foot a trunk. There’s a door on each wall that form that corner of the room, one leads to the bathroom, the other, the one next to the entrance, to a closet.

To the right of the front door there’s a dining table for four pushed up against the wall, with two chairs tucked in. There are a couple things on it at the moment, including a reading light, because it’s where you eat but it’s also where you get work done. The wall that runs perpendicular to the table-desk-hybrid is the kitchen. It’s lined with one long countertop that’s only interrupted by a sink, a refrigerator and a stove. In front of the very last cupboard, below the window, beside the filing cabinet, there’s the colocasia plant Cas got you, two months into the relationship. It’s more commonly called elephant ear plant or angel wings plant, because of the shape of the leaves.

You can afford a bigger place but you want to pay off your student loans as quickly as possible and rent seems like the best place to cut back expenses.

You kick off your boots and drape your coat over one of the chairs, then pick up a half full bottle from the table. You cross the room in roughly six steps and pour the water into the pot, cooing at it. You’d read a study that compared the growth and health of plants that received compliments daily and plants that were yelled at. You were skeptical of the results the article shared but figured you have nothing to lose.

You change into sweats but keep Cas’ shirt on and get to work. You get half of what Singer’s expecting of you done before switching tasks and finishing the powerpoint, even running through the presentation you’ve prepared once. It’s when you’re back on the report, with tabs that have nothing to do with it open on your computer, that Cas texts you.

What are you doing?

Working on the part.obs. for singer (procrastinating)

You do that a lot.

Aha are you going to call me a bad girl?

Fuck, why would you say that? Here you are having a very normal conversation. Not everything is about sex no matter how much Freud disagrees. It takes Cas longer to reply.

Would you like me to?

You think for a moment before replying. No

This time his response is immediate. Good, because you’re perfect.

w/e ur lame

That’s just not true. And then: What are you wearing?

Ahahahahaha shut up Cas

:P did you eat?

Not yet. I kind of ate ur kitchen earlier

Come over, I’m making carbonara

Im starting to see a pattern

Really? Which one is that?

The data points to an undeniable correlation between you trying to feed me and you trying to have sex with me.

Data doesn’t lie.

:P I think im gonna crash early

Worn out huh? How did that happen? You can imagine Cas smirking as he wrote this text.

This asshole where I work fifty shades of greyed me

Lucky guy. I bet he’s hung.

His ego is definitely inflated. Gnight cas

Goodnight

Read it on ao3

Chapters on tumblr: ONE TWO THREE FOUR FIVE SIX

These lovely people asked to be tagged in this story (or my writing in general): @xleggo-my-elevenx @nickylarrywigetta @trexrambling @impandagrl @hannahindie [let me know if you’d like me to stop doing that]

#castiel x reader #dom castiel #castiel smut #castiel fanfiction #spn fanfic #as you're told #as you're told fanfic #as you're told chapter four #my writing #fanforfanatic

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