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idlerin · 3 months

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CAN I CALL YOU MINE?

celebrity!sakusa kiyoomi x f!reader

part 1 | part 2 | part 3

the ikarus incident (band au)

+ word count: 9.3k

content — you're the miya twins younger sister yes, essentially brothers bsf (thats if sakusa treats atsumu as a bff, tsumu says yes, still up for debate), in this au inarizaki is based in tokyo!, as usual can be read as a stand-alone despite it being part of a mini series :3, uhh light angst for now, reader has had a crush on sakusa since childhood, she has a fan acc dedicated to him and he knows abt it too lol. oh and four year age gap.

it seemed like everyone (well, mostly your brothers) was against the idea of you liking sakusa, even sakusa himself. although you'd do everything you can to reach him, impossible it may be.

“IKARUS’ SAKUSA KIYOOMI and Haiba Alisa dating rumors heat up after viral video claims evidence of lovestagrams,” you read out loud, eyebrows furrowing, “What the hell are lovestagrams?”

Despite knowing this was more than likely a case of false assumptions made by story-starved journalists, you continued to read the article trending in your circle.

Fans express a mixture of dread and joy for a potential romance between Haiba Alisa and Sakusa Kiyoomi as a trending tiktok video compiles ‘dating evidence’ of the pair’s relationship. The video meticulously pieces together videos and clips of the past three years of Haiba and Sakusa’s interactions that seem to hint at a deeper relationship between the model and the music artist. The account also pieces together instagram posts of the pair that insinuate that they were near or at the same place, sharing similar poses reminiscent of ‘lovestagrams’ shared by couples.

That was when you stopped reading. You clicked out of the tab to quote the tweet the article was attached to. Words such as ‘when has sakusa ever seemed like the type to plan an ig layout?’ and ‘isn’t it weird to say that two people are dating just because they looked at each other or breathed at the same place’ that you both deleted in place of saying ‘i’d be happy if this were true’—you would not—‘only if sakusa announces it. like he’s said so many times that if he were to ever be in a relationship he’d tell the media himself’. A couple of seconds pass before you get a notification.

leia @keijisrealgf · 1m Replying to @kiyominiscient ur so real oomf. sakusa hates gossip pages byeee 7:04 PM · Jul 3, 20XX

[name] | kiyo’s future wife (real) @kiyominiscient · 36s Replying to @keijisrealgf he’s like their worst enemy lol 7:04 PM · Jul 3, 20XX

leia @keijisrealgf · 6s Replying to @kiyominiscient hes more likely to date atsumu !!! 7:04 PM · Jul 3, 20XX

In the middle of typing out a reply, your door slams open harshly, “Oi, you better be ready, we’re leaving in thirty minutes,” the sight of your older brother, Osamu, in a plain shirt and jeans (which eerily reminds you of your father) makes you turn your attention to him, “You better still not be in pajamas.”

“Is it true that Kiyo’s dating Haiba?” you ask instead, tone in slight distress, rising from your lounge on the bed. Despite your reassurance for Sakusa’s other fans, you were more than less assured of anything. The last time you had a proper conversation with the man even through text was over a week ago, and he would never tell you if he was seeing anyone.

Osamu raised a brow, “How would I know if Kiyoomi was dating anyone? And Haiba? The model?”

“Yes, the model and I don’t know, does Atsumu not tell you or something? He would tell you if that were to ever happen, right? Right?” you were insistent. You knew your twin brothers had gossip sessions without you because of their weekly calls you walk into now that you’re temporarily staying with Osamu. You wouldn’t have wanted to sit through Atsumu’s girl problems anyway, he’d ask you directly for advice (he does this a lot) if he needed it.

“I guess so?” Osamu affirms, kind of.

“You didn’t notice anything when you visited their studio two weeks ago?” you ask, looking back at the dreaded day you scheduled a pilates class because you wanted to try it out and Osamu told you last minute when he dropped you off at the gym that he was going to the studio because Atsumu paid him to make food. You stood there, mouth agape, watching as your brother drove away, missing the chance to see the love of your life—what’s worse was Osamu did that because you would have asked to come with him, “Cause ‘Tsumu would never let him be! He’d be all up in his ass about it.”

Osamu contemplates your judgment of Atsumu, “Fair, he would do that. But I didn’t notice anyone acting differently last time I went.”

You sigh in relief, “Oh oka—”

“But doesn’t that mean if Kiyoomi were to get a girlfriend he would never tell ‘Tsumu?” Osamu thinks out loud, you froze at his glaringly correct answer, “Anyways, it’s none of our business. You’ve got to get over your silly crush on the guy. Now get up, you lazy bum.”

You frown before putting your laptop to the side after shutting it down—not forgetting to hit post on the reply—you stand up, patting down the white layered maxi skirt you were wearing and fixing the sides of your top before showing him your palms to show you were all ready before he starts to nag you, “Why would I ever be lazy with an opportunity to see Kiyo? I’ll just do my hair for a bit.”

Osamu blinks at you before sighing, already used to your comments about Sakusa, “Okay just do it quickly,” he says before leaving. You were staying with him while on vacation from university because you had nothing to do if you went back to your house. Your parents were currently on a three-month-long trip touring Europe, they should be back in a month or so, and you’d hate to be stuck in the dormitory without any company (your roommate and most of your other friends went back to their hometowns or abroad), so what was left was bothering one of your older brothers.

Your other brother, Atsumu, was too busy being a famous celebrity to house you. Alright, he’s not that mean, the reality was he was too busy moving out of his old condominium and moving into his shiny new penthouse to offer you a place to stay. Even if he did make an offer, you would choose to stay at Osamu’s any day because it meant you didn’t have to cook for yourself. As much as you were interested in Atsumu’s band activities, or more specifically, bandmate, you would not suffer through the horrors of living with him again even for only two months, you’ve had plenty of experience in that field. It’s not like Osamu wasn’t the same kind of horror, he is, just in a different font, but again, he can cook!

Securing the last strand of your hair and smiling at yourself in the mirror, you put your essentials in your handbag. Grabbing the bouquet of blue dahlias made out of paper you decided to make on a whim the past week once you found out Atsumu was hosting a housewarming party and Sakusa would most definitely be attending. You eye the three flowers you spent hours perfecting, you were badly hoping Sakusa would keep them this time. Unreachable. The meaning of the flower coincided with how you felt for him. You’ve had a slight obsession with flowers and their hidden meanings since you gave him a rose on his birthday a year ago.

You skip out of the guest room to see Osamu by the counter twirling his keys, he looks at the bouquet in your arms, you asked him if it looked pretty and he replied by muttering a ‘when the hell did you even get the time to do that’ before leading you out of his cozy apartment and heading to the parking lot. The drive didn’t feel like it was forty minutes, you were humming in excitement as you clutched your hand-made bouquet to your stomach on one hand as it sat daintily on your lap and scrolled through your phone on the other to read through the latest antics on twitter.

Soon enough you were thrown in to face the security check in at Atsumu’s new place, you kind of didn’t get it when Osamu was asked to show his ID when he said that he was Atsumu’s brother. Isn’t looking at his face already enough proof? But of course you get that it’s for security reasons, it was just funny to think about since they were literally carbon copies of each other.

You continued your humming until you were in front of Atsumu’s door, you quickly faced your brother, “Samu do I look okay?”

Osamu grunted out a yes (very unhelpful) as he told Atsumu through the phone to let you guys in. You stayed fiddling with the hem of your top when the door opened and you were greeted by Atsumu, his platinum blonde dyed hair one of the only clear distinctions he had with Osamu.

“Well if it isn’t my dearest beloved sibli—” you ducked under Atsumu mid-sentence, patting his back and absentmindedly saying a ‘yeah yeah love you too’. You were faced by nothingness, portraits and paintings but no sign of people, you do admit that his marble floors facing the skyline did pose a pretty view.

“If you’d let me finish my sentence, you would’ve known everyone’s out at the patio,” an arm was lurched on your shoulder, the same arm twisted you and angled you to the direction of open glass doors leading out to a private terrace where you spot familiar silhouettes. You heard Osamu’s footfalls follow behind you two. You couldn’t escape Atsumu’s hold and was forced to be etched at his side as he stood still on his main living area with no plans of moving anytime soon.

“She’s been restless for the past hour,” Osamu quips, sitting comfortably on a sofa chair and stretching, the comment makes you the subject of Atsumu’s jabs.

“Was it because you were excited to see me?” Atsumu grins down at you, using his free hand to murder the top of your head. You made a sound similar to a hiss as you tried to shoo his hand away.

You display your displeasure with a large frown, “I see you all the time through Samu,” you grumble.

“Gross!” Atsumu’s face scrunches and Osamu raises a threatening fist from his resting position, eyes closed and completely relaxed, “I meant seeing me, I raised you!”

“You were four when I was born,” you scrutinize, trying to get his arm off your shoulder and fail again, you kept glancing behind you where you would very much like to be at the moment, “And I do see you. On the trending page on youtube, tsu-tsu,” you chuckle at the latest nickname your brother was given because of his recent performance wearing a pink tutu. That specific performance of the band went to every corner of the internet because of the ridiculousness of their costumes (well mostly because of the ridiculousness of your brother too). You couldn’t help but think Sakusa still looked attractive wearing a colorful zebra print jumpsuit.

“I rocked that, didn’t I?” Atsumu smirked, unfazed by your obvious mockery.

“Can we go out now? Shouldn’t you be accommodating your guests or something, I’m hungry,” you groan, saying the last bit as an excuse, eyes drifting out again. You spot a head of wavy strands standing from the settee and going deeper into the corner of the patio, making your eyes widen, clutching your bouquet even tighter in anticipation.

Atsumu ignores you and glances down at your flowers, “My guests are just the guys and some other old friends, they can serve themselves,” he scoffs, giving Osamu a look, “And I’m hoping those flowers are for me.”

You made a noncommittal sound, taking the bouquet in your hands away from his view, “It’s not.”

Your brothers have always been unsupportive of your feelings for Sakusa ever since you voiced it out when you turned eighteen, hoping that confessing your feelings at that age would make them more accepting of it (spoiler: it did not). They kept acting as if it was just some phase because Sakusa was one of the first guys you’ve ever known, but you knew it was deeper than that. It wasn’t like your feelings showed up overnight, you’ve liked him ever since you were eleven and moved in the house next to the Sakusas. Your family moved because your father’s job required him to stay in Tokyo, it was a difficult decision moving so far away from Hyogo and everything familiar to you, adjusting took a while.

As an eleven year old, you were upset that you had to move away from all of your friends. You sulked for days and your brothers had to use petty tricks to get you to talk to them. Teasing and annoying you were their way to get you to respond, it was torture. They did what they did because you weren’t yourself for weeks, they were worried and didn’t know how to express it properly as stupid teenage boys.

Until one day your brothers annoyed you enough that you stormed out of the house, tears brimming in your eyes as you ran and ran till you tired yourself out. You saw a bench nearby and decided to sulk even more there. You were missing your friends and was frustrated because of your brothers, you cried your heart out for what felt like hours but were really just minutes. You were sniffling to yourself and wallowing in self pity when a handkerchief was suddenly in your blurry view. You look up at the owner holding it out to you, seeing an older boy looking awkwardly to the side, you observe what you can and the most you can make of him was his wavy hair and lean figure.

“This is my second lap in the area and you’re still sitting there looking pitiful,” his words were sharp and shouldn’t have been something said to a total stranger, you knew that much at your age, your shock from his attitude momentarily made the tears stop flowing.

“So? Aren’t you going to take it?” the stranger nudges the cloth to you again as you reluctantly take it to wipe your tears. You felt a bit better knowing a stranger cared enough to approach you, even if he was a bit rude.

You watch as the stranger starts to walk away, you inhale a sharp breath and with your quavering voice you manage to utter, “Uhm stay, please,” it was so soft that you thought he didn’t hear you for a moment.

But the stranger does stop in his tracks and looks back at you with a pointed gaze that should have been intimidating, he just stood there and you realized that he was waiting for what you had to say. Now with your less blurry gaze, you observed him more objectively. Noting how he was what you and your friends would say was a cute boy, you guessed he was around your brothers’ age.

Before you could say anything else, loud, obnoxious voices started shouting your name and running towards you. You watch in horror as your brothers approach and in your surprise, you hide behind the boy you just met. It took minutes of your brothers shouting their worry and claiming how stupid you were for running around in an unfamiliar place (which you wouldn’t have done if they weren’t being so mean in the first place!). That’s why you refused to go back with them, still using the stranger as your shield. The boy was obviously starting to get more and more irritated with each second that passed, he never asked to be in this situation when he was just doing a good deed for once.

That was when the twins finally acknowledged his presence and started questioning him, the stranger explained that he saw you crying at the bench and approached you to give you something so you would stop (he said this in an annoyed tone), and that he was about to leave when they showed up. The twins, especially Atsumu, were relentless and kept drilling him with stupid accusations like ‘Were you planning to kidnap her?! Huh!?’ when Sakusa at the time barely looked like he cared.

“Stop it!” you finally intervened, stepping out from your human shield, “Stop being so mean to him! You’re already mean enough to me,” you huffed, dramatically crossing your arms and glaring at your brothers. This made Atsumu quiet down, looking at you with a large pout on his face as if that would make you start thinking he deserved forgiveness.

“Hey, you know we didn’t mean it like that,” Osamu began, stepping forward and reaching a hand towards you—a supposed comforting invitation, “We’re sorry, so let’s go home.”

“I don’t want to,” your glare was still set, your stubbornness evident as you placed your foot down. It made both of your brothers groan, knowing when you were in your mood, you were in your mood, meaning, it’s going to take them a lot of convincing and bargaining.

“Hey,” the voice from behind you caught your attention, the chilly air was making a mess of his hair, “I don’t know whatever it is that happened but you should go home. It’s getting dark and you wouldn’t want to stay out here so late,” the stranger looks at his watch.

You contemplate it because he did have a point, and you were missing the comfort of your bed… “You’re right,” your shoulders slump and you mumble a small, “Fine.”

Atsumu cheers and you glare at him again before looking at the stranger who really looks like he wanted to leave, “What’s your name?” you finally ask.

Your brothers took your calm tone as a sign that they could approach you and they flocked to your sides as if making sure you wouldn’t run away again, they also waited in curiosity for the stranger to introduce himself.

“Sakusa Kiyoomi,” he says, “And you guys are…?” The twins introduced themselves, their guard down after deducing that Sakusa wasn’t a threat at all. You were a bit more shy when saying your name, you suddenly felt bashful because it was now just sinking in that this stranger-no-more saw you crying your eyes out like a baby.

Sakusa was saying his long-awaited farewell when Atsumu asked him if he lived around here and Sakusa said he was ten blocks ahead to the right, Atsumu’s exact words were ‘No way?! Us too!’. It turned into you guys walking towards your homes together with Atsumu leading the conversation with Sakusa, it turns out he was dead-set on making this guy his friend. You stepped back with Osamu and just watched as Sakusa pointedly shot down a lot of Atsumu’s statements, it made you laugh.

A couple of minutes later you guys find out that you lived right next to each other, another ‘No way?!’ from Atsumu. Osamu had to push his twin back into the house to get him—metaphorically—off Sakusa in his excitement.

You stayed out as the raven-haired opened his door, you exclaimed, “I’ll give you back your handkerchief after I wash it!”

Sakusa waved his hand as an answer, the action made another grin slip through your lips.

That began a series of countless encounters and moments with the family living next door and Atsumu successfully making Sakusa his friend (still up to debate, although he successfully roped him into forming a band with two other friends so that’s a success in making him a lifetime friend for sure). You’ve had off-hand conversations with Sakusa here and there but as the days passed you grew more and more self-conscious around the teen, until one day you found yourself looking in the mirror and admitting to your reflection that you have a huge crush on Sakusa Kiyoomi.

“I thought liking Sakusa was just a phase,” Atsumu sounded baffled, this brought you back to reality, “How many times do we have to tell you he’s too old for you?”

“He is not,” you defended, four years was practically nothing! You were twenty this year! Sure you’ve liked him since you were a kid and it was just a stupid crush back then but you weren’t a kid anymore and you still like him. Doesn’t that mean something?

“He’s practically ancient,” Atsumu says as if the person he was talking about wasn’t a few feet away. The heavy weight on your shoulders makes its presence known, you look at Osamu for help but he just stares at you because he agrees with Atsumu.

You grunt, “You’re literally the same age, are you calling yourself ancient?”

“What’s the hold up?” another voice joins, you all turn to look at Suna Rintarou holding a plate with pepperoni pizza, “Atsumu you need to buy more food, and before you say anything else Akaashi and Kita agreed that we do need more food. Oh! It’s little Miya, long time no see.”

You frown at the nickname, Suna insists on calling you that even though you’ve told him countless times that you had a proper name. He’s part of the same band Atsumu and Sakusa were in, he’s also the twins’ former schoolmate at Inarizaki High which was how they met in the first place, “Hi Suna,” you greet blandly, looking defeated.

“You’re looking more and more like the twins every day,” the corner of Suna’s lips raise in a smirk as your face contorts to an expression that could only be described as disgust.

“I will start crying, tell me you don’t mean that,” you use your free hand to cover your face in exasperation at your situation. You just wanted to see and talk to Sakusa! You don’t understand why your brothers were being such a pain by keeping you away from him (which they didn’t do before, they only started with this weird intervention when you confessed your feelings for Sakusa a year ago). It wasn’t like you were going to pounce on the guy as soon as you saw him! You still had some decency and respected his space.

“I give you a part of your allowance, little brat,” Atsumu sneers. Your extra meals and clothes you were only able to buy because Atsumu spoiled you with his music money flash before your eyes.

“Tell me you didn’t mean it as a joke,” you add to remedy your previous statement. It seemed to appease Atsumu enough but it didn’t warrant him setting you free.

“This is starting to get tedious, I think it’s been enough. Let her loose,” Osamu states, standing up with his hands crossed against his chest. In his words, you scowl even as Atsumu finally lets you go, you massage the part of your shoulder where Atsumu’s weight was pressed using your free hand.

“I’m not your little pet,” you point using your handmade blue flowers in the air, dragging them from Atsumu to Osamu, as if making the statement ‘I’m going to do whatever I want’. You huff as you turn your heels to see Suna’s amused face which you glare at as well before practically running towards Atsumu’s fancy terrace.

Not before faintly hearing Suna badgering Atsumu about more food as you slide out the glass doors and are greeted by the chill of the evening air. You made eye contact and greeted the three people seated around the gray L-shaped sofa. Akaashi on the furthest to the left—the main vocalist of their band, the one most of your friends had a crush on—and Atsumu’s closest former seniors back in high school, Kita and Aran, if you remembered correctly. You knew this housewarming party would only consist of a few people because Atsumu wasn’t exactly sociable, despite his obnoxious and loud demeanor. You were surprised to not see another face though, you briefly wondered if they had another fight. You shake those thoughts away and focus on what’s important. Greeting Sakusa.

His tall figure was leaning on the edge of the patio, keeping to himself as usual. You walked around the small table displayed in the middle, sidestepping the decorative plants. You were careful as you approached, not knowing what reaction you would get. Would he act again as if he didn’t know you had feelings for him? Ignore you? Treat you coldly? But you know Sakusa wasn’t like that, despite everything, you practically grew up together. You could never be a stranger, you hoped you’d never be a stranger.

“Miya,” you almost jump in surprise at him acknowledging you first. He’s always called you by your last name, you didn’t know why when he could call the twins by their first name just fine. It’s not like he doesn’t say your name or nickname sometimes too, he just chooses to call you Miya for some reason. It improved in some way, he used to call you ‘Little Miya’ like Suna did back when you were sixteen, and you complained enough about it that he stopped.

“Were you waiting for me?” you gave him a sheepish smile, braver, stepping closer until you were standing beside him. You didn’t wait for his response in case your heart gets crushed by his answer and instead showed him the blue dahlias, “I made these for you.”

Sakusa gives one glance at the paper flowers before meeting your gaze, you wait with bated breath for his response, “You didn’t get poisoned by the rotten apple fruit shake, then?”

You almost didn’t understand what he meant, then you remembered the series of texts you sent him a few days ago which he never replied to, so you thought he hadn’t read it. You almost pout at the thought that he just didn’t want to reply, but that was typical of him already, “It looked normal on the outside okay? I told you it was Samu’s fault, who in their right mind would keep those lying around in their homes—and you’re distracting me!” you accuse once you realized he was trying to change the topic.

The corners of his lips twitch and if you hadn’t grown up with him you wouldn’t have noticed that little change in his otherwise deadpan expression, you place emphasis on your gift once again by lightly shaking it. He takes another glance, a hand reaching out to gently nudge the delicate paper-made petals with his fingers, “How long did it take you to make these?” “Around three days,” you answer dismissively, waiting patiently for him to take it, “I chose to make a nonexistent flower eternal,” you boast, proud of yourself.

“You could’ve used that time for other things, enjoy your summer break,” Sakusa says offhandedly, turning to look at the view, “Don’t waste it making gifts for me.”

“Making gifts for you is not a waste, this is the only way I can show you that what I feel for you is sincere,” your brows furrow, “And I am enjoying summer break, I’ve done a lot of things already.”

“I know,” Sakusa sighs, you didn’t know what he was referring to. Your sincerity? Or that you’ve been spending your break to the fullest? You do update him through texts from time to time, you make sure not to bother him too much for fear that he starts finding you annoying like a lot of other aspects of his life.

To your happiness, he plucks the bouquet from your hands. You were then overcome with the irrational fear that he would drop it, which was silly, “Keep it in a vase, okay?” you ask, “Preferably somewhere like your countertop or in the lobby,” you began to suggest the most visible ways he could display it, your own little way of putting bits and pieces of you in his life.

“Why didn’t you come with Osamu when he delivered Atsumu’s food?” Sakusa asks instead, changing the conversation.

A small pout forms on your lips, “He left me,” you complain, “They’re on some weird pact trying to keep me away from you.”

“They mean well,” Sakusa says, a glint of amusement in his eyes, probably imagining the twins doing everything so you wouldn’t be able to make any advances on him, “You’re their only baby sister, of course they would be protective.”

You lean against the stone railing, looking out on the view, slightly upset, “I know they mean well, that makes it worse. It’s not like I can’t think for myself, I know what I’m doing.” “Do you?” Sakusa asks, adjusting his body to look at you properly.

“You said you’d let me try,” you mumble, looking back at the time you confessed to him and declared you would try to win his heart, that he should give you a chance. At the time, Sakusa looked surprised, never thinking of the possibility that you would develop feelings for him deeper than anything platonic.

“Because I thought you’d find some other guy your age you’d focus on more when you start university,” Sakusa lets out a breath, “I’m not the one for you, Miya.”

His statement stabs you directly in the heart.

“You don’t…” you gulp, a lump stuck in your throat, “...have to like me back,” you bit down on your lower lip, “Can’t you just let me like you?”

“You mean a lot to me,” ‘just not in the way you want me to’, you could almost hear Sakusa’s train of thought, “You’re young—”

“You are not that much older,” you practically groaned, that was always their excuse.

“And yet I’ve known and experienced more in life than you,” Sakusa states bluntly, “Be serious, Miya. What you want isn’t going to work, so get over me,” talking down on you.

Your jaw clenches and you raise your chin at him, even with his frame towering over you, “It’s not that easy, Sakusa,” it was petty, not using the nickname you’ve called him since you were a kid. Being petty by using his last name as if that would put more distance between you two. It wasn’t wise letting your emotions control you, and perhaps it was proving to him more that you were still too childish for someone who already presents himself to be so mature. Though it did give the point across, that you were seriously upset, watching as something flickers in his eyes as you turn on your heels away from him.

You decide to sit in between Osamu and Akaashi, Osamu was splayed on the couch talking to Suna who was on his left about stuff you hardly care about. Even if your brother does notice your foul mood, he doesn’t point it out. Atsumu walks in holding three more boxes of pizza with a delivery guy trailing behind him holding more drinks. Which consisted mostly of alcohol and a few juices, which was most likely for your benefit. You were allowed to drink but you never liked the taste of alcohol. You watch as Atsumu directs the guy to put it on the side and that’s when you lose interest, choosing to listen in on Osamu and Suna instead.

You were catching in on their topic, but you were mostly just confused. It looks like they’re talking about Osamu’s planned business. You know this one, the onigiri franchise he wants to start. He’s working a corporate job right now to save up for his restaurant-ish (you didn’t really know what to call it), he didn’t want to risk focusing on that immediately after graduating. You know he’s near his goal, you’ve been hearing talks about finding the right building and stuff. All this business talk almost distracts you from your previous state of anger.

“Can I sit there, Akaashi?” you don’t look up to see the one person you’ve wanted to see all night. You knew he was blunt, that was just the kind of person he is, and you were used to it. Doesn’t mean just because you were used to it and you liked him, that you were immune to getting your feelings hurt.

“Sure,” Akaashi says nonchalantly, he was just on his phone the whole time you sat here, he also probably noticed you weren’t in the mood which was why he didn’t attempt conversation. You see in your peripheral vision Akaashi offering to help Atsumu with arranging the food.

You continued to listen in on Osamu’s conversation, it was beginning to be difficult to ignore the presence next to you. Your body was always hyper-aware when he was settling down, it betrays your need for indifference.

In your view, a bottle of juice was presented, it was one of your favorite flavors, “Your drink,” his voice was closer, closer than you were when you were together on the ledge. It was so difficult to stay mad at him. This was his way of making amends, you knew, and it was hard to act like you didn’t like it when he paid special attention to you. When you take no action to take the drink, he places it on the table top in front of you.

“I’ll get you food,” he says, standing up and leaving the space beside you empty. It was natural, his knowledge of knowing exactly how to appease you. It makes you feel even more devastated knowing he’s just doing this because of his years spent on familiarness with you and your habits, usually, he’d be doing this after Atsumu or Osamu (or even both of them) did something to upset you. To him, you were still the shell of the child you used to be and that meant he still wouldn’t be taking you seriously.

That was partially your fault, you were still so… emotional and childish. You knew that, you were trying to work on it, really. Based on the way you acted just a few minutes ago, you’d have to work harder. Your gaze lands on the spot at the empty seat he was in where your blue dahlias rested, he decided to keep them after all. Your chest tightens in even more fondness. Osamu glances once back at you and you shove him away.

When Sakusa came back, you took the food he offered with no complaints and drank the juice he placed in front of you, murmuring a soft, “Thank you.”

“I heard you still have that fan account up, Rika says you play pretend there,” Sakusa mentions once he settles down beside you again, gauging that you were in the mood again to talk to him properly.

You were still a bit ashamed because of how you acted, which is why you replied hesitantly, “It’s not playing pretend, I’m genuinely a fan.”

“Rika says she saw some of your tweets acting like you didn’t know Atsumu,” Sakusa seemed amused at this notion which distracted you enough that you didn’t care Rika was technically stalking you. Komori Rika was Sakusa’s cousin who works for him as his assistant, you’ve met her a couple of times and you text her whenever you want to know if Sakusa was busy or not (so you would know if it was okay to message him). She was very sweet to you so you didn’t mind it that much.

“It’s not just online, I don’t tell anyone he’s my brother—mostly because they don’t ask. And my friends would start acting differently if they knew I was directly related to ‘Tsumu,” your nose scrunches. It does disgust you when one of your friends starts gushing over him, it is probably better that you never say that fact about your family relations because your friends would start being mortified remembering all the things they said about these guys.

Sakusa hummed, knowing that part of the reason why you don’t tell people you knew Ikarus and was related to one of the band members was because of your worry that people would start befriending you because of that. He was there when your high school friendships fell apart, after all.

“What’cha guys talking about?” Atsumu intrudes by sitting between you and Sakusa, your face contorts into another unpleasant expression as Atsumu makes his presence very known and very unwanted.

You give a look at Sakusa, silently saying ‘See? I told you so’ which he responds by giving Atsumu a once-over, “You’re half-sitting on my thigh,” Sakusa grunts at him, moving to the side to be free of your brother.

“Omi-omi my guy, you know our connection transcends beyond the naked eye,” Atsumu threw an arm around Sakusa’s shoulder as you rolled your eyes and took a bite of your pizza.

For the rest of the night, you never got the chance to talk to Sakusa one-on-one again. You’d try to start a conversation with him and Atsumu butts in with his own smart-ass answer unrelated to your question in the first place. Eventually, you gave up because you knew Atsumu wouldn’t back down. You stood up from your seat, earning a few glances from the men around you. When Atsumu asks where you’re going, you say you planned to raid his house. He lets you be and you take one look back at Sakusa who was getting bothered by Atsumu before stepping inside the living room again.

First, you walked aimlessly but your feet led you to the kitchen. You started opening Atsumu’s cupboards only to find them disappointedly empty. The fridge was your next stop, you open the freezer and find chocolate bars you gladly steal. You sat on one of the countertop stools, distantly hearing Suna and Atsumu’s laughter.

What can you do for Sakusa to take you seriously? Maybe you should distance yourself for a bit, make him miss you. You chuckle at the absurd thought, in your dreams. Though it would be okay to get some space away, you’re not giving up, not by a long shot. But you’ve never really given much thought to what Sakusa’s type was since he’s never dated anyone—no one that you know of—for the past almost decade of knowing him. During high school, he only cared about his studies and the band. Then in college—where you started seeing him less—you don’t know of him dating anyone. Maybe you should ask Rika? Or maybe Motoya? Since they’re the same age.

Having a plan decided, you hum to yourself, satisfied. Biting off the last piece of chocolate, you threw the wrapper in a trash can. Then you found that the drums Atsumu had displayed in the living room interested you, spotting a pair of drumsticks lazily thrown on a desk. You take these sticks and put one experimental hit on the cymbals. A stinging ring echoed in the room.

“Oi! You better be careful with that!” Atsumu shouts from the patio, but doesn’t storm in to take them from you so that must be a good sign.

When you were younger, he never even let you near his instruments. That made playing with his instruments even more desirable. Music has always been Atsumu’s thing—well, the playing instruments part, he wasn’t very blessed vocally, Osamu used to take lessons too but stopped because it didn’t interest him enough. Your parents tried to put you through music lessons, but after accidentally plucking off the strings of your guitar one by one, they decided that for your own safety, you weren’t allowed to touch instruments.

You can still clearly remember the day Atsumu brought the three other boys home and declared he was going to start a band with them. The only person that interested you back then was Sakusa, because you didn’t know he was musically inclined. You would sneak into their practices in the extra room in your house and would stay even when Atsumu would screech at you to leave. There were days when they went to Akaashi’s house to practice so you were left pouty because you were unable to come with.

Sometimes, Sakusa was the only one who would come to your house because Atsumu begged him enough to play with him. Those were the days you enjoyed the most because Sakusa let you stay with him and watch him play the guitar. You asked him once why he didn’t play the electric guitar in the band, he said that he preferred playing the bass because it was a more reserved position, they weren’t too loud but they were a vital part of giving soul to the art (his words, not yours). That made you respect bassists even though you knew nothing about the music industry.

It was the first time you saw Sakusa with that expression on his face—at peace—it made you think that this path really must be something he loved. You were overjoyed when his and the band’s efforts paved off, even though it meant seeing him and your brother even less. They became busy, too busy for you, but you’ve learned that it was nice seeing them trending and going viral. Your social circles began to talk about them and they fawned over you too for being Atsumu’s sister.

Of course, all good things come to an end and people who you thought were your closest friends just used you to get close to them. Sakusa was there during the fallout, he checked in on you and asked if you were okay. He even took you out to distract you in place of Atsumu, who had a brand deal scheduled at the time outside the city, and Osamu, who was also out of the district for an internship. Sakusa stayed with you as you cried and cared for you more than you could ever ask. Before that, you began to think your childhood crush on him was fading but that experience when you were seventeen was when you realized that your feelings for Sakusa never left even with the distance life took him, and it probably never will.

“I’m hopeless,” you mumble to yourself, letting go of Atsumu’s drumsticks.

It only took a few minutes for Osamu to call you saying you’re going because he still had work early the following morning, all the guys say their farewells to you two. Atsumu was a tad bit over-dramatic because he was a tad bit drunk. Osamu had to pull you away from Atsumu’s embrace. You met eyes with Sakusa, giving a smile reserved just for him before Osamu completely dragged you out, noticing you were quote en quote ‘making goo-goo eyes at the poor guy’.

The rest of your summer break was uneventful.

You managed to beg Osamu to take you to a pottery class on his day off, it was fun at first but Osamu showed extraordinary skill in pottery that made your work pale in comparison. You sent a picture of you two to the group chat you had with Atsumu and the latter spammed crying emojis and threatening gifs. On Atsumu’s day off you went to a bake-your-own cake store with him, his platinum blonde hair begged for attention so you forced him to wear a beanie the whole time.

The end of break was nearing and in your last week, your parents had gone back so you had a nice complete family dinner for once. The next few days you started to pack your things again because you had to move back into your dorm, were three suitcases and a large shoulder bag a bit excessive for a two-month stay? You’d like to think not.

You were posed with another problem though, Osamu couldn’t take you back to your university because he had some three-day team building thing he was going to a day before you were supposed to go back. You thought it would be okay because you asked Atsumu and he was free that afternoon, he said that he just had a promotional shoot in the morning but he would be able to pick you up, so you thought you were all settled.

On the day itself, you stood in the lobby of Osamu’s building when Atsumu sent a message. You were starting to get irritated because he was supposed to be here by four, he promised to be here by four.

annoying blonde brother 4:00 PM I CANT MAKE IT IM SO SORRY :<< I TRIED TO I SWEAR THE SHOOT IS STILL GOING ON I THOUGHT IT WOULD FINISH EARLY BUT WE APPARENTLY HAD SOLO SHOTS???

you 4:01 PM why do u hate me :(

annoying blonde brother 4:01 PM I DONT IM SORRY IM SO SORRY :<<<< HB U WAIT IN OSAMUS APT FOR A BIT?? ITLL ONLY TAKE AN HOUR MORE I THINK

you 4:02 PM i cant i alr locked the door and left the keys inside because you were supposed to be here by now.

annoying blonde brother 4:03 PM I KNOW I KNOW IM SORRY OK WAIT THERE IN THE LOBBY ILL GET SOMEONE TO PICK YOU UP

You frown as you sit on one of the lobby chairs, alone with the receptionist. You pull your two suitcases against your legs and hug your shoulder bag, having nothing better to do. You scroll aimlessly on your feed, it wasn’t like you could do anything but wait as patiently as you possibly can in your irritable state for this ‘someone’ Atsumu is roping in to help you.

annoying blonde brother 4:11 PM he’s on his way

Atsumu neglects to tell you who this ‘he’ is. How were you supposed to know who it was? You don’t question it further, not replying back, your own form of rebellion. How could he promise to pick you up and then tell you at the last minute that he couldn’t? He had major making up to do, that’s for sure, you were not going to let him off easily. With that final thought, you were already browsing for links to clothes you’d make him buy for you.

Thirty minutes passed and you were already getting bored out of your mind. You had your head buried in your bag when your phone buzzed, signaling that it received a notification. You almost dropped your phone when you saw who it was from.

kiyo <3 4:43 PM I’m outside Osamu’s building

Sakusa? Sakusa was the one Atsumu asked to pick you up? Unbelievable. Was it his way of making up to you? What? Huh? That doesn’t seem like something Atsumu would do. What? You were puzzled, but oddly happy.

Once you got yourself together you stood up, making sure to fix yourself up, looking at your reflection on the walls. You hurriedly gather your suitcases, slinging your bag over your shoulder. You talk yourself into calming down, since this was the first time you’d be talking to him in a while. You refrained from messaging him, practicing your self-restraint, but you missed talking to him so much, even when his replies barely held any substance.

Walking towards the pavement, your heels creating a clicking sound. You held your breath as you finally saw his familiar figure leaning against his sleek black ride, was it a new car? You’ve never seen it before. His hair was styled from their usual free curls and he wore a classy white button up that hugged his body nicely. He looked straight out of a magazine—which was probably exactly where he came from. He looked up at you and your luggage.

He started walking closer to you and all you could say was a breathless, “Hi.”

Sakusa reaches for your suitcases and you gladly let him take them, “Straight to your dormitory?”

“Atsumu asked you?” you asked once you got your thoughts organized coherently, it was a spectacle you still couldn’t comprehend.

You saw that same ghost of a smile on Sakusa’s face again, “He asked Akaashi and Suna first, but they were still doing their solo shots. He even tried asking our manager. I was the last person he asked, even though I was the first one to finish, he looked pained doing it too.”

That sounded more like Atsumu, a smile plastered on your face, “Even better, fate wants us to be together.”

Sakusa shook his head as he got your shoulder bag. You followed him as he put your luggage in the back of his car, he told you to get in and you complied, walking over to the passenger seat. Happy to use this as a way to spend more time with him, and catch up with what you’ve missed in the month and a half you made yourself Sakusa-free (that didn’t mean you had to stay away from the media though, he posted exactly one instagram post that you liked immediately), that was technically abiding by being contactless.

The seatbelt clicks into place and you wait for Sakusa to get inside, you are silent as he starts to drive.

“Thank you for picking me up,” you say, hoping to start a conversation. Your university wasn’t that far from Osamu’s, probably around thirty to forty minutes away, but you didn’t know how to drive and you didn’t want to take the train with all of your necessities.

“Do you need help bringing your luggage up once we’re there?” Sakusa asks, steering, your eyes following the movement of his hands. “Uhm,” you wanted to lie and say yes, “No, I don’t think so. We have an elevator, and it would be more troublesome for you because you’d have to sign a sheet to go in. You might run into a fan too, you might see your name trending again.”

“Okay,” was his only reply. He continued to drive silently as you moped while thinking of a way to start another conversation. Time was ticking and you hadn’t realized almost an hour drive could feel this fast, does the world hate you after all?

Your brain cells were saved when Sakusa spoke next, “Have you thought about it?”

“About what?” you rubbed your palms to keep warmth, confused by what he meant.

“Dating guys in your university,” he states plainly. Your mouth hung slightly as you were struck by the memory of your conversation out at Atsumu’s patio.

You purse your lips, gripping the edge of your leather seat, “Absolutely not.”

Sakusa surprised you yet again with what he said next, “I thought that was the reason why you weren’t messaging me.”

You gaped at him, disbelieving. You didn’t even think he would notice! Suddenly you were overcome with a burst of joy, “You missed me?” you sounded way too happy for your own good.

Sakusa went completely silent. You knew you weren’t going to get an answer out of him but you were still happy with the thought of him waiting for a message from you. It was likely enough to keep you happy to be simply looking out the window on the whole way to your dormitory. But of course, you don’t miss the chance to talk to him more. You asked him a few questions here and there like how the new album was holding up and the shoots and other important marketing stuff the band needed to attend to. He answered in short one-word answers and if you were lucky, a full sentence.

Your good mood toned down when you were on the street that led to your dormitory, knowing you’d have to say goodbye to him again soon.

“Why don’t you consider it?” Sakusa asks as he stops the car in front of your building, “Seeing other guys?”

It was a bit funny how your mood went completely sour, when you were brimming with happiness a few minutes ago. Your expression was passive as you say, “I told you, you’re the only one I like,” he was bringing this up again. He couldn’t get it through his head that you would only ever like him.

“You started liking me when you were barely a teen,” Sakusa references your confession to him, where you admitted that you’ve liked him ever since you met him, “You should give yourself a chance to look at other people.”

“You won’t even look at me,” your shoulders curled, you felt like your chest was caving in on you with how loud it beat. You wondered if he could hear it.

“You’re better off with another guy,” Sakusa insists, leaning against his seat, exasperated, as if you were draining the life out of him.

“So you keep saying,” you say in almost a whisper, “Is it because you’re already seeing someone?” you ask, your mind thinking of other possible reasons as to why he didn’t even seem to want to let you like him. If he were to say that he was, you’d stop. Even though it would hurt.

“No,” Sakusa sighs, completely turning off the engine.

“Then why can’t you even let me like you?” your voice almost cracks at the end. Your nails dug in your palm.

“Stop being stubborn, Miya,” Sakusa faces you completely, his jaw set, his eyes, the only tell for his actual emotions.

“Am I not pretty enough?” it was out before you could control yourself, you couldn’t even look him in the eye because of how ashamed you were at your question, “Sorry, I know you’re not the type to be shallow about appearances. But, of course you still have standards and that… might not… be me,” your voice getting fainter the more you talk.

There was a ringing in your ear, you felt lightheaded. Thinking of ways to remedy the situation, a sour situation you turned even more dour. You started feeling anxious in your seat, too bare, too exposed.

A touch was what got you out of your blinded stupor. A touch that was cold against your warmth.

“That’s not it at all,” a gentle hand raised your chin so you could meet his gaze, “You’re getting it all wrong.”

“I’m sorry,” you apologize again, guilty you were letting him in your emotional frenzy.

“Don’t… apologize,” Sakusa began looking frustrated, his jaw ticking and his eyes shaky, “You’re beautiful, okay?”

You blinked, once, twice.

Despite all the signs that you weren’t dreaming, you still weren’t convinced this was your reality. Sakusa just called you beautiful. Sakusa told you, you were beautiful. Sakusa called you beautiful. No matter how many times you rephrase it in your head, it still felt unreal. You dumbly stared back, not knowing what to reply.

“I, uhm, o-okay?” you embarrassingly stutter out. Sakusa found you beautiful.

“I’m only looking out for you,” the hand still on your chin caressed your cheek. His words brought your senses back. You were afraid he was going on another tirade about how your affection shouldn’t be directed at him. That you should find some other guy to pour your heart out to. That no matter what you do, he would never be the one for you.

You nibbled on your lower lip, observing as his gaze fell down to it and back up to meet your unsteady stare.

“But…” you began, thinking of comebacks, reasons, anything, “I like you,” your eyes fluttered, in the end, that was the only thing that mattered to you, “So much,” your voice was fragile, and you could barely look at him straight.

You watched as his gaze sharpened, you waited seconds for a frustrated remark but it never happened. Instead, it looked like he was contemplating something. You waited, patient, willing to take whatever it was that he was willing to give you. And then finally, as if he couldn’t resist it, he tilted your head to the side and slowly, softly, lips barely grazing your cheek. Like his touch, it was cool, yet it gave you warmth all the same as heat rose to your face.

It was quick, and abrupt, and he let go of you immediately after as if your skin gave him burns.

Sakusa was tense as he opened the door and stepped out of the car. You gulped, your heart wanted to escape your chest, and you could hardly remember how to breathe.

Steadily—as steady as you can manage in your current state—and carefully, a hand went up to hold your cheek where Sakusa kissed you.

a/n — alright so i went a lil crazy with this one BUT MY EXCUSE IS i am in love with sakusa kiyoomi HES SO UGH mine

general taglist + @luvrsthrist @cherries4denki @cloud-lyy @misscaller06 @noideawhothatis @wolffmaiden @rivaiken @wooasecret @nicerthanu @sukunasrealgf @ris-krispie @seiamor @electriclovei @leeknowsarchive @todorokiskitten @rory-cakes @sexyandcringe @rinheartshyunlix @wh0zumy2k @iluv-ace @xiakyo @sanaexus @clyches @noble-17 @renardiererin @gra-eae @ilyless @girlincrimson

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novy2sirius · 2 months

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african astrology signs

disclaimer - i’m not african or extremely informed about african astrology. i am new to it, but i like posting about all the different types of astrology on my account. all the information i’m using is from the articles below ♡

these signs and traits are based on the african astrology passed down from the greeks. there are multiple types of african astrology such as egyptian, but this is one of the oldest ones ♡

these are only some of the main characteristics, but if i do more research in the future i may make more in depth posts about each signs traits ♡

sources i used - one // two // three // four // five ♡

more types of astrology ♡

father (the baobab tree):

➛ january 4th to february 3rd

traits - honest, thoughtful, loves their freedom, realistic, good business skills, often successful, struggles with anxiety a lot

mother (the wealth of amber and silver):

➛ february 4th to march 5th

traits - strong self discipline, quick intellect, known as the sign of wealth, mood can change fairly quick, bad temper

family:

➛ march 6th to april 4th

traits - affectionate, sociable, emotionally reserved, gives good advice, fits in well, struggles with letting people take advantage of them

son (small services to the neighborhood):

➛ april 5th to may 4th

traits - good at making friends, has the ability to bounce back quickly and go from a really bad point to a really good one, indecisive, stubborn at times

daughter (the market):

➛ may 5th to june 4th

traits - likes peace and harmony, doesn’t enjoy arguments, feminine, always wasting their time and effort on relationships that won’t last, can act dramatic at times

uncle (the ancestor):

➛ june 5th to july 4th

traits - leader, always rules groups, good sense of humor, self absorbed

witch (the judge):

➛ july 5th to august 4th

traits - quick thinker when not under stress, can analyze situations well, helps others, good at roasting people, overly judgmental

lion (the kola nut):

➛ august 5th to september 3rd

traits - high energy, wise, clairvoyant, confident, sassy, unstable emotions, annoying at times

antelope (the traveler):

➛ september 4th to october 3rd

traits - empathetic, loves to travel, complex personality, misunderstood a lot, overly sensitive

the sage (the distance):

➛ october 4th to november 3rd

traits - creative, strong character, romantic, enthusiastic, many poets have this sign, can become successful if they stop living in fear

aunt (the child of the world):

➛ november 4th to december 3rd

traits - gentle, powerful, generous, kind, devoted, may struggle to come outside of comfort zone

wealth (the harvest and the granary):

➛ december 4th to january 3rd

traits - positive, doesn’t fall in love quick, prefers to spend time alone and would benefit from spending most of their time alone, often wealthy, can struggle to trust intuition

#african astrology #african #astrology #astrology blog #astrology chart #birth chart #astrology community #astro community #types of astrology

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astro-vogue · 5 months

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• Hi everyone welcome here, you can address me as A. (she/her/hers) as I prefer to keep my identity as private as possible.

⎯ I'm 21, and not a native english speaker so please forgive me if I make accidental errors here and there, I'll always try my best not to...

• I'm a student from Astrology University, (I'm about to take my professional diploma) and I've been studying this subject professionally from certified astrologers since 6 full years now. [more about my astrology education here]

⎯ I have a life outside this blog as I'm a full time student and practitioner, please be patient if my answers don't arrive immediately.

• Come here anytime you'll want simple, truthful, straightforward & informative articles about western astrology.

⎯ I will never, ever, post something without proper documentation from valid sources + I will always make sure to link them in each article.

⎯ I will never, ever, sugarcoat any placement. I tell things as they are, this blog ain't for the weak.

All forms of hate and discrimination are banned from this blog.

All forms of criticism unless constructive and polite are banned.

All forms of impolite and ignorant behaviour are banned.

All people supporting Israel are banned.

Trauma Dumping and attempts to get free chart readings are banned.

People who do any of the above or generally annoy me will be blocked, I don't have time to deal with people's bullshit.

Asks can only be made in the proper ask box, not the DMs.

Do not ask for free readings unless I make a post which allows it.

Do not ask me to interpret more than 2 things about your chart.

Do not ask me about sensitive subjects (health, pregnancy, death, abuse, trauma and so on).

Do not ask personal questions about me, my chart or my life.

Asks that don't follow the rules will be deleted and people writing them will be blocked.

Anons are okay, as far as they're respectful.

If you make an ask don't expect me to answer immediately as I'm a full time student and practitioner so I need time.

• ASTROLOGY BASICS 101

⎯ the 4 elements

⎯ elemental lack

⎯ quadruplicities

⎯ polarity

⎯ the 12 zodiac signs

⎯ mutual reception

⎯ planets: part I - personal/inner planets

⎯ planets: part II - social planets

⎯ planets: part III - generational/outer planets

⎯ critical degrees

• ASTRO-OBSERVATIONS/NOTES

⎯ debunking observations, part I (anon ask)

⎯ debunking observations, part II - Composite 12H Placements/Stelliums

⎯ uranus in the 3H/11H

⎯ challenging composite placements

⎯ pluto in the 5H

⎯ moon square north node

⎯ wealth indicators in a chart

⎯ new fame degrees

• ASTEROIDS

⎯ poseidon & zeus

⎯ hermes

• RELATIONAL ASTROLOGY / FUTURE SPOUSE

⎯ multisynastry and multicomposite charts

⎯ inception charts

⎯ future spouse according to derivative houses

⎯ future spouse's home and family

• SEXTROLOGY

⎯ sexualization of placements

⎯ big d*ck indicators in a chart

⎯ manuel ferrara's chart and indicators of big d*ck

⎯ rocco siffredi's chart and indicators of big d*ck

⎯ future spouse's dick size and shape - groom PC & priapus

• POLLS & DISCUSSIONS

⎯ toxic/inaccurate observations online [n°I] [n°II] [n° IIII] [n°IV]

• CELEBS SYNASTRIES/COMPOSITE

⎯ Iman & David Bowie

⎯ Victoria & David Beckham

• OTHERS

⎯ stop being scared of pluto

⎯ small tip/advice: the 7H Persona Chart overlapped with your Birth Chart

⎯ career in astrology

#numerologica #astrology #numerology #palmistry #tarot #astrology blog #numerology blog #astro notes #astro observations #astro community #astroblr #western astrology #natal chart #birth chart #astrology elements #elements in astrology

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hestialevy · 2 months

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Pierre Gasly thinks it's great that Esteban Ocon will stay in F1 in 2025 and gives advice to his future teammate.

Despite his complicated relationship with Esteban Ocon, Pierre Gasly is glad that his current teammate has found a seat in Formula 1 for 2025. He takes this opportunity to give advice to Oliver Bearman who's going to team up with Ocon at Haas.

"He has to get familiar with this environment, he's already had a good experience, but having Esteban at his side will be a good thing for Ollie as a reference."

Pierre Gasly affirms he's happy to know that Esteban Ocon will still be in Formula 1 next season.

" I think on the personal side, I'm happy to see Esteban stay in F1 because no matter our relationship, I think he's definitely a driver who deserves to be in Formula 1 and he's one of the 20 best, so I think its great and I'm happy to see that he's still on the grid next year."

(translation from Auto-moto Sport article: x)

#pierresteban #pierre gasly #esteban ocon

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bitchesgetriches · 3 months

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Hello, can you or your followers please give some words of encouragement about how careers aren't linear? And how that what you study in college/university isn't always what your career is in, and how that is ok? (And any words of advice for how to figure out, post-college, what it is you actually want to do? Or that it's ok if that process takes a while?)

Feeling lost and not where I should be in life because life happens and circumstances change.

Thank you!

My darling child... you are doing JUST FINE. In fact, we're proud of you for approaching your future career prospects with such thoughtfulness!

I myself went through a pretty big career transition. I wrote about it in these articles (which you should read because I am an excellent writer and also very reassuring):

I Lost My Job and It Might Be the Best Worst Thing That’s Ever Happened to Me

My Career Transition Succeeded When I Gave Fewer Fucks, Made More Friends, and Had More Fun

Also, Kitty has written a lot on post-college career choices. She is brilliant and wise and you should absolutely follow her advice:

Your College Major May Not Prepare You for Your Job—but It Can Prepare You for Life

High School Students Have No Way of Knowing What Career to Choose. Why Do We Make Them Do It Anyway?

The Actually Helpful, Nuanced, Non-Bullshit Way to Choose a Future Career

If you found this helpful, consider joining our Patreon.

#career advice #career path #employment #advice #adulting #life tips

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reality-detective · 11 months

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Patriots in the Netherlands are walking the streets dropping flyers at the homes of citizens in hopes of awakening the people. According to Rem64 it is having great success. He sent me the flyer and I translated it to English so everyone can read it. 👇

Message to the population The information below is distributed worldwide by hundreds of scientific, legal and political organizations to inform humanity. Evidence for the stated facts can be found in the detailed evidence reports on StopWorldControl.com

The World Economic Forum wants to shape your life The world's richest come together at the World Economic Forum in Davos, Switzerland. The founder of the WEF, Klaus Schwab, is known for statements such as: We determine the future and We infiltrate governments. The WEF trains Young Global Leaders who are positioned in governments around the world. French President Macron, Canadian Prime Minister Trudeau and German Chancellor Merkel are Young Global Leaders of the WEF. The Netherlands and Belgium also work closely with the WEF and serve their agenda. Part of this agenda is to replace privacy with transparency. They want every detail of your life to be known soon: what you do, who you meet with, what you eat, what you buy... The WEF announces that new technologies will record everyone's thoughts, feelings and dreams in the cloud , where governments have access to this intimate data. To combat climate change, the WEF wants to abolish all private property. You will have to rent everything: houses, cars, work tools, etc. The WEF calls for blocking sunlight by massively releasing chemicals into the air. The WEF encourages the normalization of pedophilia, while the UN and WHO instruct all schools to teach sexual techniques to small children in kindergarten, so that they start having sex as young as possible, with people of any age or gender. As absurd as these plans sound, they are promoted by the WEF, the UN, the EU, the WHO and companies such as. Google and Facebook. They are part of the sustainability goals of Agenda 2030, which are supported by governments worldwide. All evidence of this can be found on StopWorldControl.com

The World Health Organization wants to rule the world The World Health Organization is being legally restructured as an effective global dictatorship, able to impose binding mandates on all countries whenever they declare a pandemic. However, the WHO is a private organization that operates outside any democratic process. One of the WHO's main backers is Bill Gates, who has no medical training whatsoever, yet is promoted as the medical authority around the world. As the world's largest vaccine dealer, his health advice is to inject everyone all the time, making him billions of dollars. WHO Director-General Tedros Ghebreyesus also has no medical training. Yet Gates and Tedros dictate to all the millions of medical experts worldwide what they can and cannot do. Article 18 of the proposed Pandemic Treaty allows the WHO to shut down any source of information that does not align with what they want all of humanity to believe. This means censoring millions of experts in every field. Only what the WHO and Bill Gates say should be heard. Do you want undemocratic organizations to become dictators over your life and over all humanity? Do you want all objective scientific and medical information to be hidden so that you only hear what a single private institution wants you to believe? Do you want to be forced to receive dangerous injections for the rest of your life, without being informed about the risks? If you do not agree with this course of action, we invite you to inform yourself carefully at StopWorldControl.com

The news is determined by investors Many people do not know that all major news agencies are owned by a small group of investors, who determine what can be said in the news. In addition, billionaires such as Bill Gates and George Soros donate hundreds of millions of euros to news organizations around the world, to determine what they broadcast Udo Ulfkotte, an editor at one of the largest newspapers in the world, the Frankfurter Allgemeine Zeitung which is published in 148 countries well-known I have been a journalist for 25 years and I have been trained to lie, betray and never tell the public the truth, journalists) are being bribed worldwide by the CIA, billionaires and governments to manipulate the public The world's best-known political commentator, Tucker Carlson, she The news you consume is a lie of the most insidious kind CNN technical director Charlie Chester said: There is no such thing as objective news. All newsreaders are told what to say. He admitted that CNN deliberately creates fear to manipulate their viewers, whether it is about a pandemic or climate change. Texts from Matt Hancock, British Health Secretary, read: We are making everyone scared? The World Economic Forum, the World Health Organization, the United Nations and the European Union, which are owned by the same financial entities that control the news, are calling on governments worldwide to censor any information that does not follow their narrative. Any investigation that exposes their criminal operations should be labeled conspiracy theory or disinformation.

Vital information is hidden Thousands of scientists, doctors and medical organizations are sounding the alarm as millions of people have died and hundreds of millions of people have been disabled after being injected with the experimental vaccines for COVID-19. Data from the US CDC shows that in the US alone, one and a half million people suffered from side effects including death, stroke, heart failure, brain disorders, convulsions, life-threatening allergic reactions, autoimmune diseases, arthritis, miscarriage, infertility, rapid onset muscle weakness, deafness, blindness, etc. Worldwide there is an explosion of turbo cancer and sudden death. Harvard Pilgrim Health Care's famous Lazarus report revealed that overall, only 19% of vaccine side effects are reported. According to this study, the number of adverse events and deaths must be multiplied by a factor of 100 to understand the true prevalence of serious vaccine injuries. COVID-19 has a 99.7% survival rate, comparable to the seasonal flu, and there are many effective medications, such as hydroxychloroquine, ivermectin, budesonide, chlorine dioxide and many more. These have hardly any side effects, are completely safe and available everywhere in the world. This means that no vaccine is needed. However, the WHO instructed governments worldwide to ban these drugs for the treatment of corona and to censor any doctor who spoke about it, that vaccines are the only answer.

What's going on in the world? Why are governments controlled by private institutions like the WEF and WHO? Why is vital information hidden? These are not conspiracy theories as claimed, but facts that can be verified on the international website StopWorldControl.com. We work with world leaders in the fields of law, science, medical care, journalism and politics. Our network consists of more than 100 organizations that jointly inform humanity. They include Nobel laureates, presidents and presidential candidates, former generals of the US army, organizations of police officers and investigators, as well as top officials of the United Nations, the World Health Organization and the European Union. We encourage every right-thinking person to inform themselves carefully Visit the website StopWorldControl.com Pass this flyer on to others.

Stand Strong! Stand United! Be Prepared!

✨ 🛡️ 🇳🇱 WWG1WGA 🇺🇸 ⚔️ ✨

#pay attention #educate yourselves #educate yourself #knowledge is power #reeducate yourself #reeducate yourselves #think for yourselves #think about it #think for yourself #do your homework #do your own research #do some research #ask yourself questions #question everything #netherlands

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jcmarchi · 6 months

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Stellar Blade Feature – Angel From Heaven

New Post has been published on https://thedigitalinsider.com/stellar-blade-feature-angel-from-heaven/

Stellar Blade Feature – Angel From Heaven

Introduction

Stellar Blade’s development was announced in 2019 by Korean developer Shift Up Second EVE Studio for current-gen consoles, boasting talent from the popular MMO Blade & Soul. It wasn’t until 2021, however, that we got our first proper look at Stellar Blade during a PlayStation showcase, where it was shown with its former title, Project Eve.

For those not paying close attention to Korean video game news, it felt like it came out of nowhere. In the trailer, a beautiful woman is seen fighting a hybrid monster robot. She uses a sword to break off one of the cyborg creature’s arms to use as a weapon before being thrown through a wall, revealing the fight was happening on a space station all along. As she careens through space further and further away from the station, it is revealed that a much larger, much creepier creature with too many eyes has grafted itself onto the facility from the outside. It’s an attention-grabbing first look, and the trailer only gets more interesting from there as the woman (whose name is Eve) is seen pulling off more acrobatic combat moves on an Earth that has experienced some kind of apocalypse.

Considering Eve, her combat style, settings in both space and on a ravaged Earth, and a robot floating behind Eve offering help and advice, many were quick to compare the game to Nier: Automata. Speaking with Stellar Blade’s game director, Hyung-Tae Kim, and its technical director Dong-Gi Lee, through a translator, that is not entirely by accident, even if the final game will likely showcase plenty of differences between the two.

“You’re probably aware of this, but Yoko Taro’s Nier: Automata was the biggest inspiration for Stellar Blade,” Kim says. “That was even the starting point or motivation to make this game, so I’m very grateful for that.” Both Kim and Lee are quick to detail other points of inspiration. The two specifically call out anime and manga like Ghost in the Shell and Battle Angel Alita but add, “While Nier: Automata did give motive to the progression of the story, the combat itself is different. Of course, they share a common factor of being an action game, but we tried to make the combat flashier yet tense.”

A Game With An Ending

After playing Nier: Automata, but before Kim, Lee, and the Shift Up team were diving into the minutiae of making Stellar Blade, development began in 2018 with a much simpler desire: to make a video game with an ending. During that time, development in Korea was focused predominantly on the mobile market, with few focused on console development, which led to some barriers. “It was pretty tough to get all the developers of console games into one team […] mobile games – they have their own, I guess, pros, because you get to enjoy the world that you love whenever you want, it continues on, and it’s maintained constantly, but then there is a market where only that kind of game exists,” Kim says. “That balance needed to be broken.”

Combat For Everyone

Stellar Blade’s combat is flashy in all gameplay footage to date, with Eve pulling off pre-determined moves and throwing the titular Stellar Blade into the air while her long hair twirls around the action, but those impressive animations don’t explain what players are doing moment-to-moment. Eve can learn various combos, but it’s not the kind of action game where you are memorizing a series of useful inputs and trying to execute the right ones at the right moments. Every encounter begins with the decision of going in offensively or defensively. Enemies will not wait for Eve to make a move, and she can defend, parry, or use evasive maneuvers. Countering enemies will put them in a groggy state, which opens the window to use combos or “Beta Skills,” as Kim and Lee refer to them. “There is also what’s called the Balance Gauge, and if you succeed in consecutive parrying, you can deal a huge blow to the enemies,” Kim says. “Other combat options include assassination, ranged attacks, and more, depending on the situation.”

Boss battles carry a similar strategy. Kim refers to them as “the most important content in Stellar Blade” and adds that there will be a level of pattern recognition required to defeat them. Kim says combat is being designed in such a way that it will require proactive effort from the player, but it is not trying to make an overly challenging game like so many that are inspired by From Software titles like Sekiro: Shadows Die Twice. Difficult modes will exist for players who want them, but so will story modes. “Another mode exists for someone who wants to focus more on the narrative part of the game,” Kim says, “But that doesn’t necessarily mean that we got rid of the fun of the battle itself.”

Heaven And (Destroyed) Earth

In the world of Stellar Blade, Eve is an airborne squad member from space, but she is human. She has a secret that distinguishes her from her coworkers (that Kim and Lee were not ready to share), but otherwise, she is at the same level as the other members of her squad. “Humanity has been defeated by these enemies called Naytibas that appeared out of nowhere one day on Earth, and so humanity, they took this space elevator, and they escaped to an off-world colony,” Kim says. That’s where privileged humans live, but many have continued to survive on Earth and Eve and her peers have come back down to try and take the world back from the Naytibas. Of course, as is often the case in science fiction, not everything is as it seems. Eve is surprised to find humans living on Earth. Everyone had been told there were no survivors.

Many of the humans Eve meets on Earth call her an angel, considering where she came from, and welcome her assistance in the form of sidequests. “You can see it as an angel that descended from outer space with a sword,” Kim says. Defeating the Naytibas is the main mission, but many need help on an immediate and smaller scale. Kim does not intend for these sidequests to break the format. When asked what sidequests from other games have influenced the ones in Stellar Blade, he replied, “Let’s see… The side quests were not influenced by certain games specifically. I should say that they were influenced by all the games that I have played all this time.”

For example, there is one series of consecutive sidequests where Eve is trying to help a broken woman in an old pub in Xion, a location where humans have found refuge after the apocalypse. The woman used to be a singer, but now she is struggling to even stay alive. The missions Eve completes will help her recover mentally and physically, though Kim teases an unexpected ending. “There are some choices that alter the results,” Kim says when asked if the player will be making story decisions in these moments, “But honestly, I wouldn’t say you have much freedom. But there certainly are important decisions to be made.”

[embedded content]

Costumes serve as one of the rewards for completing sidequests but don’t expect wearing different outfits to change Eve’s statistics. The goal is to make sure no singular clothing item is emphasized. They want players to choose the outfits based on personal preference rather than statistical significance. Approximately 30 costumes will be discoverable throughout the course of the game, whether by just stumbling across them, receiving them as rewards, or creating them through found recipes. The team also plans to add more after release.

Kim used the terms “ingredients” and “recipes” when describing creating certain costumes, but Stellar Blade won’t have players crafting new weapons – The Stellar Blade is Eve’s only weapon. It can be improved to swing faster or deliver more critical hits, but they want players to fully focus on the titular sword.

To The Future

Every new look at Stellar Blade showcases footage of a game that looks stunning in action. I also appreciate Kim’s candid appreciation for Nier: Automata and its storytelling. It’s rare developers are so straightforward about the games that inspired them, and it is refreshing to hear someone love a game so much that they wanted to make one like it. The feeling of combat remains Stellar Blade’s primary question mark as I, unfortunately, did not get a chance to go hands-on, but I am already invested in finding out Eve’s secret, what the Naytibas are, and what is happening on this version of Earth.

“When the world experiences an apocalypse, people develop these uncanny religious tendencies, and it will be interesting to see the changes in them,” Kim says, wrapping up our discussion. A compelling seed planted for a science fiction narrative.

This article originally appeared in Issue 364 of Game Informer

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brf-rumortrackinganon · 4 months

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I’m not saying it’s true but it does make me wonder where Richard Eden got the story. Well, who do you think was his source?

Ok, so ever since the anon earlier from the weekend reminded us that Richard Eden was the one who started the affair rumors, not Giles Coren, I've been doing some digging because "Richard started the affair rumors" did not sound right to me. Yes, he's messy, but he's not that messy. He wouldn't come out and accuse William of cheating that directly without proof.

And I was right. I dug up Eden's original column from March 15, 2019. He does not say anything about an affair. He says:

As the wife of our future monarch, the Duchess of Cambridge was assumed to be queen bee of the 'Turnip Toffs' who live near Anmer Hall, the country home she shares with Prince William and their children in Sandringham, Norfolk. Friends claim there is, however, a rival to her rural crown: she is Rose, the ex-model married to their neighbour, the Marquess of Cholmondeley. "On the face of it, it's bizarre, but Kate seems to see Rose as a rival," claims one of their aristocratic set in East Anglia. The reasons for the alleged competition remain unclear, but there is no doubt the two couples have become close friends since the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge were given Anmer Hall by the Queen as a wedding present.

It seems to be a follow-up to this 2016 article by Catherine Ostler, written after the Cholmondeleys hosted the Cambridges as part of a Norfolk charity gala dinner benefiting East Anglia's Children's Hospitals (one of Kate's patronages).

In her article, Ostler claims that Rose is "queen bee" of the Turnip Toffs because she has the grander life - literally the exact same life that Kate does without the pressure of the crown and public expectations, and a much more palatial home.

The fact that both reporters used the phrase "queen bee" is telling because it's never been a descriptor for Kate. No one in her circle, the rare few times they've talked, have ever called her a 'queen bee' or described 'queen bee' behavior, suggesting that Ostler's and Eden's depiction of Kate as 'queen bee' is simply drama for clicks and hits.

Now it's possible there are things we don't know about Kate. But someone who's been in the public eye for 12 years (at the time of Ostler's writing), surely if she had 'queen bee' traits and expectations, it would have been more publicly noticed by now.

Eden's article sent all the royal reporters scrambling to Norfolk to find out what the hell is going on. That led to the infamous 'Turnip Toffs' article by Dan Wootten, published on March 22, 2019, in which he writes that:

[R]oyal insiders say Kate has refused and told William, 36, that former model Rose needs to be “phased out” as one of the couple’s closest confidantes. Our source revealed: “It is well known that Kate and Rose have had a terrible falling out. They used to be close but that is not the case any more. William wants to play peacemaker so the two couples can remain friends, given they live so close to each other and share many mutual friends. But Kate has been clear that she doesn’t want to see them any more and wants William to phase them out, despite their social status.”

No one was speculating about whether it was an affair. It might’ve been a theory on the Sussex Squad’s side of social media but it wasn’t “big” enough to make it a global topic.

Enter Giles Coren, on March 26, 2019:

I’m not sure what article he’s referring to and unfortunately these tweets appear to have been deleted.

Coren’s tweet set the world on fire. It was picked up by social media and Sussex Squad immediately. Including Nicole Cliffe, who blew this up in American media, which successfully brought the rumors off social media and inserted them into mainstream media.

Cliffe is a parenting advice columnist from Slate and co-editor of a defunct feminist satire e-magazine, from Canada but living in Utah (👀, because if you know, you know). She describes herself as:

a simple woman who stans for Meghan and has spent years paying way too much attention to these weird inbred people.

On March 30, 2019, she went on a Twitter rant about the Kate/Rose/Norfolk drama. Unfortunately for us, those tweets have since been deleted.

Unfortunately for Cliffe, the internet is forever and someone screenshotted for posterity.

But much like Cliffe accuses Clarence House and Kensington Palace of “doth protest to much” here, she becomes equally guilty of “doth protest to much” by doubling down on these claims and using a dubious source - a source so dubious that Cliffe later edited her article to acknowledge it’s a problematic source…while still claiming it was an authoritative source! Because

this story [is] factual enough to have fun with.

(Let’s pause for a second: a parenting advice columnist decided to duck with a marriage that had three small children because she stanned a woman the couple weren’t close to and she found the facts fun to play with.)

Fast forward 3 years and Coren has had enough of being blamed for the affair rumor. In January 2022, Coren refutes claims that he’s the source of the affair rumor, saying:

Fake news: Every time the story of Prince William’s supposed affair with Rose Hanbury comes round again in the American press, as it has this week, the first source quoted is always a 2019 tweet from “British royal reporter Giles Coren”. So can I please just say that, while it was far from being the worst thing I have ever tweeted, I was JOKING. I know nothing about the royal family! I’d had a boozy lunch talking to fellow hacks about the story and in the cab home went online to blurt: “Yes. it is an affair. i haven’t read thee piece but i know about the affair. everyone knows about the affair, darling. even us jews.” Just look at it. Look at the spelling. The non-capitalisation. The grizzly ethnic self-identification. It’s hardly Chips bloody Channon, now, is it?

Well, sure. Coren hates the attention *now*. If it was the joke he claims it was, then why not do damage control immediately when he sobered up?

Coren doubles down in October 2023, refuting again that he’s the source for the affair, this time saying that he was making a joke.

Confirming once again that yes, he’s really tired of being blamed for the affair rumors and he hates getting dragged into this over and over again. Well, buddy, maybe should’ve thought about that before drunk-tweeting.

The internet lives forever, everyone. Coren will forever have to deal with being the only eyewitness who confirmed William and Rose having an affair. He definitely hates it (and I wouldn’t be surprised if he lost opportunities because of it) but this is the bed he made. Whether he’s repeating gossip he heard from Norfolk, spreading a rumor that Meghan allegedly started, drunk-tweeting, or making a joke, the fact remains that he blew it up. And being a reporter for The Times gave him credibility and authority, regardless of whether he was a royal reporter or not, that meant people would take his words seriously and not at all treat it as the joke he may have intended. How could he have not realized that?

Anyway. Let’s recap:

Richard Eden of the Daily Mail had a source leak to him that Kate and Rose weren’t getting along and that Kate saw Rose as some kind of rival.

Dan Wootten investigated Eden’s story and confirmed that Kate and Rose weren’t getting along and that Kate had needed a break from their friendship and asked William to support her. William husbanded the situation by trying to fix it for Kate instead of just listening to her.

Times reporter Giles Coren then tweeted that the Kate-Rose falling out was actually because of an affair between Prince William and Rose.

Nosybody writer Nicole Cliffe then tweeted that it was so obviously an affair because it’s the only explanation for why previously-close brothers William and Harry no longer got along since she adored Harry’s wife and knew it had nothing to do with her. Cliffe then doubled down on her interpretation.

In January 2022, Coren revealed that he was drunk and had been making a joke when he posted his tweet saying it was an affair.

In October 2023, Coren doubled down on “it was just a joke” defense.

So…there it is. I think we can absolve Eden of being the source of the affair rumors. But Eden absolutely is guilty of starting this drama but to think it ended up spinning into something he never expected.

Now - you know it’s coming - what’s my theory about what happened between Kate and Rose?

In 2018, Rose was named a patron of EACH. Kate, as we know, has been patron of EACH since 2012. In this article announcing Rose as a new patron of EACH, they report that EACH was building a new center, called The Nook, to replace its current operations building, with construction set to finish in…drumroll please, March 2019.

So probably what happened, considering that Eden used the word “rival,” is that Kate saw Rose as stepping in on her work with EACH, maybe being dismissive of her ideas and support, and they butted heads about it. Because let’s admit it; how many of us have been in situations where the newcomer to the group wants to feel heard and show their excitement, only to end up doing too much that it ticked off the original group?

And March 2019 when Eden revealed the “rivalry,” EACH, including their patrons, would’ve been planning and preparing to open The Nook. And possibly there were disagreements about what to do or how to be involved. Kate got upset and was hurt and needed a break from the friendship or some time away (because remember, she also had a baby at home and was also dealing with a devolving situation with Harry and Meghan so the stress could’ve been piling up).

As for William getting dragged into it, per Wootten’s story? I suspect he husbanded and tried to fix it for Kate instead of just listening and helping her get space for the situation to cool down.

In the end Kate officially opened The Nook in November 2019 and on January 5, 2020, Rose was part of the Cambridge group of friends that had joined Kate for her birthday weekend, suggesting that the ladies had patched things up.

Because not every disagreement or falling out between women has to do with a man. It’s the twenty-first century. We’re better than that.

Now, going back to the anon’s question. Who is Eden’s source?

No idea. Some theories:

Rose or a friend, upset that Kate was maybe trying to push her out of work with EACH. (I don’t think it was Rose herself because it would spell disaster for her husband’s work if someone that close to the monarch - and who would eventually be supporting King William - had a spouse who leaked about private/personal grievances to the press.)

Someone close to both women who talked too much, too openly.

Someone just stirring the pot for drama’s sake.

Someone who wanted to make Kate seem petty.

But Harry has a theory. He writes, in Spare:

Harry goes on to say that he and William had already confronted Charles about this aide once before and it hadn’t gone well:

What do y’all think?

#brf #theories #waleses #rumors #cholomondeleys #chumleys

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kurooscoffee · 9 days

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Joker Out mention in the new Miha interview in 🛑 STOP magazine 🫶

How do you feel when you see your son Kris on stage with the band Joker Out? Does it remind you of your early years with Big Foot Mama?

Miha: Yes, it reminds me of myself, I see myself in him. Sometimes, when they have a great concert, I get a bit emotional when I watch them. It was exactly the same for us, except ours was more like a rock party. With Joker Out, it’s serious. Just like when I, as an 18-year-old, went to Hala Tivoli to see some American or European band and our jaws dropped, that's how I felt in Stožice when I watched Joker Out. It really made me go, "Wow." Now I follow them purely as a fan. Their rapid and powerful success is because they were smart and went to Eurovision. We all underestimated the power of Eurovision.

Do Joker Out ever ask you for advice? Have you ever helped them with writing or creating songs, or do you leave them alone?

Miha: I leave them alone, honestly, they don’t pay attention to me. Even when I share my thoughts, they always do things their own way.

How do you see Kris and Joker Out's future in the music industry? What advice would you give them?

Miha: If I gave them any advice, they’d probably do the opposite. I would just tell them to keep doing what they’re doing because they’re doing it well, and not to rest on their laurels. And they won’t. I wish them success, to reach even higher levels internationally. I hope they get serious airplay in England and across Europe. They have every opportunity. They are talented, intelligent, and good-looking too.

Full article in Slovenian:

#joker out #Miha Guštin #Kris Guštin #miha has like 3 same stock answers on everything he's asked about so it feels like I've read this exact same thing in 5 other interviews lo #but hard agree on them deserving more recognition 🥹

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formosusiniquis · 6 months

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in the library there lived a hobbit

Steve Harrington has always been a romantic. He spends his time in his head imagining possible futures with strangers, but one in particular has really caught his attention: the mysterious son of Wayne who comes to Baby and Me every week with his granddaughter Lucy.

When opportunity knocks, Steve is quick to suggest that this mysterious dad starts volunteering at the library. Enter Eddie Munson, a high school crush, and now Steve has to deal with the fantasy single dad he'd been imagining being real, in the library, and reading fantasy books to kids twice a week.

aka my fic for the @strangerthingsreversebigbang

Steve Harrington/Eddie Munson; Robin Buckley & Steve Harrington WC: 20k | T | No Archive Warnings Apply | Tags/Themes: Children's Librarian!Steve Harrington; Single Dad!Eddie Munson; Getting Together; Modern AU; Fluff; Fantasy/Daydreams Vs. Reality

It's been an absolute joy to bring to life @oriarts beautiful artwork please, please check it out here

And a very special thank you to @thefreakandthehair for beta-ing this for me, check out her stuff here

There's a snippet below the cut, but you can of course read the full thing now on AO3

They didn't really write advice columns for men who work with kids and suffer from terminal cases of baby fever. He knows: he's checked. Although, the reference librarian who helped him was Robin, so Steve can't really rule out the possibility that she missed something in her haste to write her own article.

Actually land a date, move out, have babies. Love the agonized aunt of your future children, Robin

It isn't like it was information he didn’t already know. Steve is very aware that he isn’t in the place for kids yet, mostly in the literal sense: romantically single, platonically in a two bedroom apartment with Robin with no space for their own stuff, let alone a kid.

So instead, for thirty-five minutes a week, he gets his fix by leading Baby & Me.

“Give you some help settin’ up, Kid?”

Steve’s startled from his mindless rhythm of setting out the chairs in the activity room and brought back from his baby-fueled drifting by one of his favorite story time guests.

“They pay me to do this; not you, Wayne,” he says, not bothering to turn all the way around. “You can fill the silence if you really want to do something though.” Steve’s set him an impossible task: Wayne is a talker the way Dustin has good manners. The only grandpa who comes to story time, he’d been coming for a month before a particularly bold widow and her youngest granddaughter got a name out of him— but not the date she’d been hoping for.

He takes his usual seat in the circle, across from where Steve is still standing, arms crossed and empty.

“Where’s?” Steve asks.

Wayne quirks his brow down. When Steve follows it all the way down to the floor, Lucy is happily making her way to them in a slow and effortful crawl across the room.

“Been doin’ that since the last time we’s here,” Wayne says.

“Is that why you all missed last week?”

“Nah,” he waves the thought away, “Lucy Joan caught a cold. Didn’t think you’d want ‘er spreadin’ it to the rest of the kids. ‘Course her Daddy was a wreck, had to pry him out with a crowbar to get him to go to work this week.”

Pink cheeked with a gummy smile, Lucy is the picture of health today. She’s made it to Steve now, tugging on his pant leg trying to stand. Crawling is going to lead quickly into walking he suspects.

She doesn’t make it to standing, her tugging taking on a new message. Steve has a rule about picking up any of the babies, a need to create personal boundaries for him and them, but her big, brown doll eyes are harder to resist each week.

#steddie #steddie fic #stranger things reverse bang #strvbb #stranger things reverse bang 2024 #librarian steve harrington #single dad eddie munson #my fic #steve and robin #modern era fic #stranger things fic

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nanowrimo · 1 year

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Writing Tips for Every Age and Mental State

Not every piece of writing advice will apply to you — and that’s okay! Sometimes, your writing strategies will change as you go through life or learn more about yourself. NaNo Participant Clara Ward shares writing advice that they've learned over time.

There’s no right way to write. Writing—like life—is about finding your best fit. What follows are tricks that worked for me. Please borrow what works best for you right now. (Then save a few ideas for future you!)

I wrote my first novel four decades ago, when I was thirteen. I’ve written while juggling three jobs or zero. I’ve written as a kid, a parent, and an empty-nester. I’ve learned from my own neurodiversity and mental health challenges along the way.

Each struggle taught me how to customize my writing practice. Here’s a list of what worked for me at different stages. Adapt as you see fit.

Stage 1: Meet Yourself Where You’re At

Outline - For my first novel, I sketched furtive notes on the back pages of a school notebook. I created headings for each page that became section or chapter titles later. Numbers helped me order the scenes and letters delineated details.

Note: Leave extra space for fun facts or snippets of overheard dialog. Years later, I heard a NaNoWriMo buddy joke, “Careful, or you’ll end up in my novel.” My apologies to my high school geometry teacher, who received no such warning.

Avoid Distractions - I needed a closed door to write at first. I couldn’t read other fiction during the week or two when I frantically converted my outline into a rough draft. Luckily, I wasn’t in charge of meals back then!

Stage 2: Find Your People

Give Yourself Permission - I first heard about NaNoWriMo in 2004, when I was parenting, working, and volunteering as if there were two extra days in each week. I hadn’t written a story, an outline, or notes in over a year, but I knew exactly what I wanted to write. I signed up for NaNoWriMo and opened a family meeting by showing the webpage to my spouse and kids. I explained how I’d budget four hours a week for writing in November.

Note: I didn’t complete 50,000 words that first November. But the next year, my kids enthusiastically joined the Young Writers Program!

Enlist Support - Eventually, my kids and I designated one hour each day for writing. There were many distractions, but it felt great! We attended NaNoWriMo write-ins at a donut shop to build community, and my kids each persuaded a friend to join. (Yes, donuts are a sometimes food, but at least they weren’t asking for coffee!). With support and determination—and for me, a bit of sleep debt—we all met our writing goals most years!

Stage 3: Embrace Your True Strengths

Emotion Mapping - In the last couple decades, as attitudes and terminology evolved, I’ve learned a lot about my own neurodivergence and mental health. Oddly enough, the self-knowledge I gained by masking and compensating before I knew those words, informed both my writing and the tips given above. As I became more honest with myself, I brought more emotion to my writing.

Note: Sometimes it helps to skip scenes I’m not in a good headspace to write. I jot down key plot and character points inside curly brackets and skip to a scene that suits my current feelings. Since I don’t used curly brackets anywhere else in my writing, they’re easy to search for when I’m ready to go back.

Fascinations - After years of being warned about “info dumps,” I realized that my own fascinations (neurodivergent or otherwise) were assets that could serve my writing. At the beginning of 2020 I did a deep dive into researching sea creatures and ways to protect our oceans. At the back of my research notebook, I gradually outlined my 2020 NaNoWriMo Novel, Be the Sea. Parts of that outline cross-referenced pages of ocean research or articles I’d saved online.

Note: The system above worked well enough for me that I now have a book deal for Be the Sea, which will be published by Atthis Arts in early 2024!

Seriously though, this isn’t a post about how to get published on a 40-year plan. By matching your writing practices to your ever-changing self, you give all your stories the chance to be told. I wish you and your stories that success!

Clara Ward lives in Silicon Valley on the border between reality and speculative fiction. When not using words to teach or tell stories, Clara uses wood, fiber, and glass to make practical or completely impractical objects. Their short fiction has appeared in Strange Horizons, Decoded Pride, The Arcanist, and as a postcard from Thinking Ink Press. Clara’s 2020 NaNoWriMo novel, Be the Sea, will be available from Atthis Arts in early 2024. For updates on this and other projects, follow Clara on their website. Photo by Anastasia Shuraeva from Pexels

#nanowrimo #writing #writing advice #writer's life #neurodivergent writers #for parents #inspiration #by nano guest #clara ward

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sleepyfan-blog · 3 months

Text

Serious Research

Author's note: This is the next fic in Mer!Trai's story! First. Prev. Next

warnings: none! please ask me to tag something if it bothers you

tagged: @egrets-not-regrets @the-pure-angel @whorety-k @gallifreyianrosearkytiorsusan

@kit-williams @bleedingichorhearts

Summary: Trai uses one of Ancient Terra's "laptops" to better research how to properly woo his lovely, bonded human.

It had taken weeks of diligently working alongside some of his fussier Cousins to finally convince one of them to allow him use of the Ancient Terran equivalents to a dataslate - while they did have tablets, which were touch-based on top of the device to use it, but he found that it was much easier for him to use the laptop versions of the computational devices, as well as the desktop versions. The laptops were more easily portable and after some trial and error on Trai's part, the Word Bearer had figured out how to use the keyboard without accidentally causing damage to the device with his claws. It was very important to him that he learn how to use this device, as it was connected to the Ancient Terran version of the Noosphere - which was called The Internet at this time.

He had many questions, and while most of his cousins were content to answer the questions that he had with varying degrees of patience and amusement, Trai wanted to do some independent research… Besides, he didn't want to endure the usually playful teasing that he was likely to suffer if they found out that he wasn't sure how to court you, his wonderful bonded human without coming off as too intense, or potentially cause an awkward cultural clash. If he learned more about your culture, he hoped to have at least a bit better of an understanding as to your likely reactions to what he was going to do. That and he knew that humans courted each other during this time period. They probably had advice and tips on how to date each other that he could probably use. Which was what he was also after.

Trai clicks on the icon for the internet browser, humming a little to himself as it took a couple of seconds to load up, remembering the internet safety rules he'd been instructed on - and that not everything on the internet was truthful, which meant that he would need to try and cross-check any "facts" he found online with other sources to hopefully figure out what was actual truth and what was either a lie or a fancible fable.

Several weeks had passed since Zedkiel had met his fellow caretakers to the Primarchs. While he couldn’t say that he would be able to get along with all of them under normal circumstances

The first question that he started with was perhaps a little bit basic, but he felt that:

What do humans like?

Was a sensible first question to ask. After all he desperately wanted to make you happy and to smile at him regularly. There were a bunch of articles about the psychology behind why humans like what they liked.

What is Psychology?

The first couple of links were to acquire psychology degrees of some kind - either through online methods or links to physical training centers. How fascinating. Those links didn’t really explain what psychology was, so he continued to search, finding the answer to be fascinating. It made sense to study oneself and others around them mentally. It was a subject of study in the far future as well. But now he’s gotten off track, and went back to his search. His next inquiry was:

How do I woo a human?

He huffed a little as he sees a couple of links pop up, followed by several suggested questions. He still felt decidedly masculine, so it wasn't as if he was a woman trying to court a man… Nor was either you nor he underage, so questions about boys and girls didn't make sense to click on.

He found several more linked sites:

A wiki page suggesting a little over twenty different flirting tips, a place called Reddit on the r/dating… Thread? Community? Something. There were several links to "dating" sites. But it wasn't as if he wanted to date just anyone - which seemed to be the preferred term to wooing.

He read through the flirting tips, all of which boiled down to; ask questions about the person you're interested in, give them genuine compliments and find ways to touch their shoulders/arms/hands that didn't make them uncomfortable. There was conflicting information about eye contact - some humans liked a lot of eye contact, others found it intimidating or insulting.

Trai huffed a little and erased his previous question before putting in:

How do I date someone?

There was another link to the how to flirt page, but he'd already read that. There was also some stuff about being honest; he'd tried honesty and had spooked his human. Maybe there was a balance between being honest with one's potential love match and not saying all of what you hoped would happen all at once up front? But how did someone do that? It was another question to ask, once he'd read through the search results of this.

There were other helpful-ish suggestions. To be present in the moments that you spent with your loved one, and to be open to the dating opportunities around you… But Trai was determined to date you, not just any human who might be interested in being courted by and courting an Astartes. Maintain Independence… He could hunt and fight just fine, he simply stayed in the research aquarium that you worked at because this was the easiest way for him to keep contact with you. And he could help you with some of your work tasks!

There was also a link about woohooing one’s partner in amongst the other links about dating. Trai had no context for the term, but as he murmured “Woohoo.” To himself quietly, it was a fun word to say, and hopefully it would make sense?

Ohhhhh… It was related to a game… And in order to do so, the make believe person a mortal was playing needed to use romantic options on the target sim. Hugs, and Flirting… Asking if the sim was single and pick up lines. Also something about having a higher friendship level helped to.

Did Friendship Levels exist on Ancient Terra as well? Or was this only a thing in this sims game? What exactly was this sims ga-

No. He was getting off track again. And apparently if one had a good friendship level with the target sim, one didn’t necessarily need to also use romantic options in some versions of this sim game.

… Maybe he should look into this game, to get some practice in how to flirt and interact with baseline mortals in M3? Something to look into, at least. But later. He was a mer on a mission.

What is a pick up line?

Ah! They were a mixture of verbal ice breakers and ways to signal one was romantically and/or sexually interested in the person they were saying the pick up line to. He began to look up specific pick up lines… Groaning a little as many of them were really terrible, at least to his sensibilities, but many of them were partially meant to flatter the person they were being told to… But some of them were borderline if not outright rude, crass or demeaning.

One of the other suggested questions puzzled Trai, so he clicked on it.

How do you date in real life?

As… As opposed to what? Daydreaming in one's mind about who one wanted to date? Trai had done plenty of that already, as well as silently pining over your beautiful soul and lovely body. He wanted to act, not just daydream and silently wish. Human lives were so short, especially on Ancient Terra.

Apparently there were ways to date a person on this version of the noosphere? Trai couldn't imagine wanting to do that. The Noosphere was maintained by the Adeptus Mechanicus and heavily monitored by them and the loyalists. He shuddered internally at the thought of such a private part of him being documented for any curious mechanical maniac to read and chuckle over. He had enough teasing from his Cousins over his first fumbling attempt thank you very much.

He clicked on the wikihow site, as it had several different articles pertaining to dating.

One of the wikihow titles jumped out at him: How to get bitches: a comprehensive guide.

Wait.

What. What was a bitch?

He was unfamiliar with the word and quickly typed in the question. A small frown appeared on his face as he read through the different explanations as to what the word was. Using the term bitch in this context made him a little uncomfortable and wary that the tone that it struck in the title meant that the entire article was probably slanted in a mildly to moderately insulting manner to those being pursued. Still, he did click on the pejorative title. Perhaps it was meant to be provocative on purpose?

… Stalking, emotional blackmailing and manipulation and badgering someone over and over again until they gave into you and agreed to a date so you'd stop bothering them didn't seem… Like the most auspicious or loving start to a relationship. Still, he supposed these were things to watch out for?

You did seem to enjoy spending time with him, at least. Maybe if he set up a date idea, and then asked you to go on one with him, you'd say yes, and he could prove just how great a partner he would be? Yes. That sounded like a great idea. Which was why he typed into the question bar:

First date ideas

… Wow, that was a lot to take in all at once. there were dozens of articles with hundreds of ideas on them. But many of them required the use of local currency, of which Trai had none, so he altered the search term to figure out what free date activities he could suggest for you and he to go on. Or wait. He knew that many humans seemed to like sand dollars and other shells, especially if they were intact!

How to trade shells for money or other objects?

... Oh. Now he was reading articles about how the seashell trade was causing a great deal of devastation to the local mollusc and other shelled fish populations. Or at least, it had been until some of his pushier cousins had stepped in and started causing trouble for the large companies who were sending people out by the hundreds to collect shells, leaving none behind on many beaches. Still... If he harvested the shells sustainably, maybe he could get some of the local currency? But you worked in sea life preservation, and trying to court you with money he'd gotten with the blood of sea life felt... Wrong somehow. So he typed in:

Free first date ideas

There were fewer search results, but that honestly was less overwhelming for him to read through. While some of these first date ideas required items or materials he didn't have and probably wouldn't be able to easily barter access to, there were several things that he could do. That and he really liked the idea of sharing a meal with you, if you were amenable. He was an expert hand at hunting and foraging, and had learned the food safety standards for baseline humans on Ancient Terra, and was confident that he could create a meal that wouldn't make you sick.

Now all he had to do was to work up the courage to ask you out.

#celestial seas au #hot mer summer #warhammer 40k #space marine husbandry sentience #space marine husbandry #my writing #oc: trai #reader insert #word bearer #word bearer oc #fish man is trying his best

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