#bc honestly it goes against their whole “living free and in the wild” thing to have pokemon

[littlecrittereli]

Why does the concept of a wild kratts and pokemon crossover work so well

When I asked for suggestions the other day a lot of people asked for pokemon content but at the time I was just doing some sketches. However, I was inspired to take a crack at it a little later! And alas here is Chris' team. (He's a grass primary obviously) (... is it obvious what my favorite gen is.......?)

I feel like he wouldn't be a pokemon trainer though... more like a researcher.... so basically the same exact thing they do in Wild Kratts... except with pokemon in the place of real animals. And their pokemon are considered more of companions and teammates that can help on adventures. (Maybe occasionally helping with villain encounters?) Idk! It's not like a whole AU I wanna dive into but I thought it would be fun to draw as a one-off thing :] Not sure if I'll make it through the whole crew, but I'm definitely working on Martin next. Most of my fav pokemon are water types so I'm really excited!

[haywire-cebus]

Linked Universe Soul Eater AU

i coouuullld work on the long linked universe fic i have been slowly chipping away at

but instead ive decided to type of the lu soul eater au ive had cooking in my brain since i first got covid. it is the nature of all humankind (me) to have soul eater au/headcanons for all things i like. lu is no different. please feel free to talk to me about this im obsessed with it

sky: he is a meister. at first, it was him a sun against the world (meaning, in class at dwma). sun is a shield weapon, and while that made fighting-styles need to get creative, they always managed. however, during an adventure, they find a student named fi, a sword-weapon, and she joins them as sky’s sword. so now he’s like a full, cool knight. during that adventure, however, Something Happens, and the kishin Demise they were fighting traps fi in her sword form. it’s horribly tragic, and sky and sun can feel her getting quieter and quieter as time goes on. they don’t know how to stop it, and its scary. they also team up with groose, whose two weapons (his friends in the game) are gun/cannons. i just feel like groose deserves a gun.

four: he is one guy, a meister. (i was tempted to make him his split brothers pretending to be twins and not four of them, and theyre all weapons tho) but really, its four. he went on his first adventure with a much older weapon (the minish cap enzlo) as a mentor, but at the end enzlo basically said ‘its time for me to retire.’ four then moved to death city to figure himself out, and immediately got wrapped up in a witch’s plan, vaati, who wanted to figure out what makes meister and weapon souls tick. he kidnapped four and broke his soul into pieces. at first, four thought it was only four pieces, but eventually realized vaati ripped a piece of him out and infused it with some black blood, and poof! out comes shadow, a weapon. (kinda like crona, but separate body). the soul fuck-up also, temporarily, split four into four people (because. idk. magic. and soul eater bc. let me have this ok.) and while at the end, four fused back into himself, shadow stayed separate, though he can hop into four’s shadow at will. four then goes back to death academy, and tries to hide shadow as best he can. the deku tree finds out, of course, but lets him keep it a secret. they pretend like all that happened was he got turned into a weapon, and so shadow hides because theyre all scared of people hating him for being the pure essence of black blood (when the chain finds out, its obviously all sympathy and love and a little “holy shit thats awesome”)

shadow mostly turns into a scythe, because thats what vaati wanted in a weapon (he took the term “death scythe” too literally), but he can sometimes turn into a glaive/staff that holds pseudo-elemental attacks, and him and four are working on him holding that form more bc hit makes him more comfortable. four also cant split anymore, but the four pieces of himself are still separate. sometimes they work together smoothly, but sometimes its a cacophony of noise and yelling and migraines.

also due to his... i hesitate to call it adventure. but due to everything four is very good at reading souls. he figures out twilight and midna’s whole deal right away, and pieces together warrior’s fairly quickly. he can tell legend and wild have more forms than they send to show off, and can read hryule’s soul better than hryule can for himself (and learns things about hyrule that he doesnt even know about himself.) but four is a good kid and keeps this all to himself (and yet, still doesnt tell the others about himself. bc hes scared of them being freaked out)

time: he and his wife, malon, are a badass duo, honestly. malon is a death scythe, though her real form is a huge, sickass claymore. they live on campus, and spend most of their time tending to the garden and outdoor parts of campus. they occasionally go on missions, but try not to because they went through enough as youth (taking on a full-fledged kishinn(majora and the fierce deity stuff) and absorbing part of its soul into your body to stop it will make you a little tired of fighting, and that was only their second adventure). time, however, cant stop himself from bonding with and wanting to protect all these new students, and it doesnt help the hero worship a lot of them have towards him.

as for times past, he was dropped off on the academy’s doorstep as a baby, and raised by the deku tree himself. when he was old enough to begin classes, he was a little... out of touch with people his own age because of this, and some folks were pretty mean to him. and then he met malon, and had the biggest case of puppy love/crush possible (but he couldnt figure out his own feelings). they teamed up for a while, got far in their schooling, saved the world. the normal stuff a student does there. that first adventure took it out of him though, so he just kinda... disappeared for a while without telling anyone. malon got pissed, of course, but not fully at him, more at... the world for not being better about helping everyone after these horrible adventures. she goes after him, finds him fighting a kishin by himself, no weapon, mostly a soul-battle, and helps him finish the fight. he’s now missing an eye, has half a kishin in him, and she expects him to be even more broody and awkward, but hes just so happy to see her. (he doesnt confess then, though). they go back together, take a little time to rest and heal, graduate, malon becomes a death scythe, and only then does time confess. malon gives him a “i was waiting for you to be ready :)” and theyre very, very happy. or, as happy as you can be in this world.

legend: he is a weapon, and he can transform into tons of different weapons, like wild, but while wild’s are more... traditional weapons, legends can turn into a sword, a shield, and the most random weapons one can conceive of (meaning, the cooler more flashy ones you see in soul eater, and also his massive amounts of tools in lu). this poor kid has gone on so many missions, mostly entirely by himself, as his own mesiter, basically. he fought with ravio for a while, when they met, because they were soul-compatible, but ravio quickly decided being a meister wasn’t for him. they still room together in death city (also may rename this deku city if i rename the school to deku weapon and meister academy. even if it is funny to have the happy big tree’s city named death city). legend was on his own for a while in school, until he met hyrule

hyrule: he is a meister. he never found a weapon he was compatible with, and instead carried around just a regular sword while scraping through his classes (other students were like, is this allowed??? but death (the deku tree, bc i think its funny to make the deku tree death in this au) was like ‘lmao he’s managing to complete all the missions we send him on, so why not.’) hyrule and legend are eventually on a mission together, and in a jam, hyrule is like ‘please let me try to fight with you’ and legend is like ‘fucking fine. you burn your hands bc i’m not compatible with anyone, thats not my problem.’ and then it works and they kick fucking ass together, tho hyrule struggles to use legend in any form other than sword, and legend hates being in sword-form (bc past trauma he refuses to talk about until it messes with their compatibility. they have a little character arc and hyrule trains using legend in other forms and legend is more comfortable in sword form. and yes the trauma is marin-related. when he partnered with ravio, he never went into sword form)

hyrule is also good at soul resonance and attacks and stuff (like maka and stein). he just has no real training on it bc where he grew up, all the weapons stuff and soul stuff was seen as taboo, so even as he’s actively learning about it all in his classes and knows his kind of abilities are seen as cool and useful, he doesnt want to tell people. (legend eventually finds out and helps him find someone to teach him about it. that someone is time. hyrule quickly becomes super good at it all)

twilight: while not a witch, he is the child of a witch and a human. he was abandoned in a village as a baby, and they raised him communally as their own (though, of course, rusl takes him in the most) he doesnt have any magical powers, but when a witch (zant) came to his village and cursed everyone, he managed to survive by just being cursed into his wolf-form. he had never trained to use a weapon, but quickly meets midna (zant’s half-sister. shes technically a witch, but shes also a weapon. shes a very very weak witch in terms of magic.) on his journey. what follows his basically what youd expect, but he never loses midna companionship in this au. the two of them go to death city and enroll in classes and begin training. only time and the deku tree/death know about his wolf form, which he keeps hidden due to the prejudice again witches in the school. when he first meets wild, who has no memories and is so confused with the world, he just got back from a mission. he immediately latches onto him and helps him figure things out.

also midna turns into these cool as gauntlet/gloves things. with them, twi can hookshot (launch one and the fist goes out and retracts), punch so so good, and charge up for Shadow Blast things for ranged attacks.

warriors: He is actually a weapon, though he hides this from literally everyone. before he came to death academy (which im considering renaming Deku Academy, bc the deku tree is death in this au), he was guilted into being the weapon for a girl named cia. her sister always suspected something was off, but lana never spoke up bc her sister was always there when she tried. eventually, he learned that cia was helping a kishin and was going to try to feed him human souls so they could be powerful (and together) forever, and he got the FUCK outta there. he told himself he would never turn into a weapon again, and he met athena (his zelda. i like that name better for her bc shes literally the goddess of wisdom and warfare), a rapier weapon who could also turn into a bow. (yes i like when the weapons turn into things. its cool also also lets me keep more sword imagery while still giving the boys different weapon options) he teams up with her and they fight, and no one suspects wars is also a weapon bc of how good he is at disguising his soul (he’s only good with his own tho, he can’t read others for shit).

wind: a meister. he grew up in a coastal town, training with some older weapon and meister duos but never really focusing too much on it, until a bird-witch kidnaps his sister. he teams up with his childhood friend, tetra, to get her back. tetra doesnt know shes a weapon at this point (i dont remember if thats how that works in soul eater but shh my au my rules) until she discovers that during the mission. she can turn into a hammer, which functions (obviously) like a hammer, but also as a hookshot (the top flings off, turns sharp, and then retracts), or the sides of the head of the hammer open and suck/blow wind very powerfully (like the gust jar). they get his sister back and wind and terta are like “that was fucking awesome wanna do that forever?” and then they go to death city to go to school.

wild: he is a weapon, like tsubaki, and can turn into basically any weapon he chooses. his zelda, flora, is his meister. they first met when wild first showed that ability to his parents, and wilds family brought him to flora’s father so she could be his meister. this is the past, because i want it to be. so flora’s dad is rich and pays his family for him to be flora’s weapon. wilds family isnt malicious about it, theyre just struggling to get by. they technically give wild a choice in it and ask him if he’s okay, but wild is young and knows this is how he can help his family, so he doesnt really see “no” as an option. he figures he can rise up in station here (tho this is only 100 years before everything else, so the world isnt too “social classes are you stay where you were born unless you become a knight and we still have noblemen and stuff,” but it’s still there. its actually fading, which is why flora’s dad is so intent on her being a good and powerful meister, and why he’s picking a weapon from a lower social class at all (its also bc wilds ability is rare)).

so wild is raised side by side with flora, who hates him like in canon (meaning she doesn’t hate him, just hates how easy it is for him to access his different forms and he he goes along with his lot in life. she just wants to go to school and be her own person, but her dad wants her to be a world-famous meister). hes still not treated super well (he’s not floras equal in the eyes of her father), but he can go visit his family on their days off from training and stuff. eventually, they go on a mission to stop a well-known kishin. flora is extremely good at soul stuff, and basically locks him in place when he mortally wounds wild. wild is taken away by their battle companion impa and her meister, to Death Academy (where they had gone to study occasionally, but still mostly stayed with flora’s father and his private tutors), where he is put into stasis and sleeps for a hundred years. flora and the kishin, known as Calamity, are locked away as the soul-battle rages in in their minds. one hundred years later, wild wakes up with no memories but a voice calling out to his soul. he trains, on his own, because no meister can hold onto him, and goes out on his own to get flora back. he fights by himself with only parts of his body transformed, gets flora, and takes her back to the school, where the two of them rest. now they get to acclimatize to life 100 years in the future. flora struggles because she should be sad- her dad is long gone, wild doesnt fully remember her, everything is different, but at least she can study like she always wanted to.

she still wields wild like a badass, though wild tends to take missions on his own without telling her so they pass the fighting-oriented classed while flora focuses on her studies. she notices only half the time (not for a want of trying tho, wild is just really sneaky)

as of now, i dont have any real... plot with these. just everyones backstories and stuff. but i love the idea of the deku tree making time and malon take all these students on a field trip, which quickly spirals into a whole adventure.

[hellothisissade]

some squid game thoughts

as someone who is an avid kdrama watcher and absolutely loves the whole ppl with money making the lessers die for sport---i found squid game mid-tier af.

maybe i would feel differently if i hadn’t watched alice in borderland first, but whatever:

1. the series starts off amazing, we meet gihun who for all intents and purposes is a shit bag with a gambling addiction whose consistently poor choices keep catching up with him.

2. i guess he loves his daughter tho

3. i think it’s weird af that despite gihun’s obvious gambling addiction and incompetence as a father, his wife is low key framed as a heartless bitch for leaving him

4. GONG YOO’S CAMEO OMG the way this man can wear a fucking suit I SWEAR. he’s utterly captivating on screen, i literally couldn’t take my eyes off of him. 

5. i really loved the very first game we see gihun play as a sort of hazing into the squid game arena. it’s very telling of his state of mind how quick he was to keep playing (completely mindlessly) and how quickly he forgot about the cash reward (more focused on getting revenge). it was a GREAT scene

6. the loading, drugging, track suit distribution and red light, green light game was all dope af. really loved the use of color between the contestants, guards, and the setting. from the stark almost asylum-like nature of their “dorm room” to the candy colored and maze-like quality of the setting itself. 

7. the red light, green light game was hella iconic, i honestly dont think any other game comes close in comparison for me tho if i HAD to choose it would be tug of war. the little tightrope number that comes later was fun too.

8. at first i thought it was odd af that they were allowed to go home but it made for an interesting break to allow us to see just how desperate someone must be to enter the arena again

9. i’m sorry but i think it’s wild af how we’re lead to believe that gihun is entering the arena (again!) to save his mother when he literally leaves her for dead LOL. the reason why she wasn’t able to get medical attention is bc he kept gambling her money away. and instead of humbling himself to actually accept the money he asked his ex for on behalf of his mother, he lets his “pride” get in the way. pride in what, i can hardly imagine.

9. the gangster guy and the woman clearly there to be the residential psycho got annoying af to me REAL FAST. so incredibly one note, it was so obvious where their story was heading i rolled my eyes so hard during their sex scene. the only valid outcome would be if she slit his throat in the bathroom so i woudn’t have to suffer through that tired ass kdrama gangster archetype but ALAS that was not to be the case

10. it’s so weird how in one scene the guards dont condone fighting but in the next, just to allow the gangster guy free reign to randomly beat the shit out of ppl for profit. i feel like i need to re-watch to be sure but i swear the guards step in to breakup a fight prior so i was super confused but maybe i’m remembering it wrong.

11. HOW COULD I FORGET ALI?? i was pleasantly surprised to see migrant working representation in this show at all. and honestly ali is great. i will say tho there is a difference between being naive and being dumb and it seemed ali toed the line a little to often depending on how the writers needed him to be in order to further the plot

12. i DID NOT like how the random “crazy” woman went on a xenophobic rant against ali AND NOT A SINGLE PERSON STOOD UP FOR HIM despite the fact that he’d literally saved their lives multiple times by that point. i think it’s one thing to have a xenophobic character, a whole other thing to have the narrative SUPPORT said xenophobia through the silence of those that witness this behavior

13. same also goes for sang woo’s extremely sexist rant prior to the tug of war game. i thought FOR SURE the narrative was going to check him (like he really did take it too far) but NOOOOOOO the narrative doubles down on it by making it a game of brute strength. while in the end it was strategy that helps them win, the female characters still remain largely invisible in this game having been labeled “useless” by their male counterparts. all the clutch moments come from ali, the old man, sang woo, and gihun.

14. it’s weird in general the lack of female characters and the mediocre writing they all receive but i was really excited by seobyeok. she seems like a lead, especially given the fact that she’s the only female character we get any real backstory on. but for the most part she’s a background character. present when the plot needs her, rarely contributing to strategy. VERY resourceful (yay!!) but the second she’s no longer needed she gets randomly injured and unceremoniously murdered just to further the rage (and plot!) of her male counterparts. yikes!

15. omg i love the organ selling side plot LOL. i’m sad it ended as soon as it did. made me wish we got more perspectives from the guards given how many of them there were. 

16. how did the cop dude not die? he was so sloppy with his investigation after a while it was silly they couldnt catch him despite the eleventy million cameras in the facility. i also low key didn’t care about his story once the organ selling plot ended. i completely forgot he was looking for his brother LOL

17. i hated the marble game wow. with the fire of 1000 suns wow. i think this was the episode where squid game lost me a little. the plot armor around the gangster guy was ridiculous, he should’ve met his hubris in that game instead of subjecting us to more of his predictable ass behavior.

18. seobyeok’s scene was the only one worth my heart in the marble game. i’m sad they literally brought the other girl in for one game just to die in the next, she was so great i would’ve love to see seobyeok develop a stronger friendship with her even if she died later. sheesh! 456 contestants and only 3 women with speaking lines??? ridiculous. 

18. and idc what anybody says, sang woo’s “plan” in the marble game was such an obvious lie. it literally made no fucking sense. ali “falling” for it made him look stupid af and i’m mad he went out being made a fool of like that. i’d forgive it more if sang woo’s “plan” was even remotely believable. like damn, fool me too! but ali just ends up looking like an idiot, running around like a chicken with its head cut off as if all common sense left him when you can CLEARLY SEE IN EACH PAIR THAT ONE PERSON IS CONSISTENTLY DYING. like come tf on!

16. the moment the VIP’s open their mouths to speak is when squid game goes from intense to straight up camp. it’s just silly and incredibly difficult for me to take the games seriously from that point on. the dialogue and acting is just awful. 

17. this show had ZERO queer representation until they needed one of the VIPs to be predatory LMAO. like wow, talk about poor fucking taste

18. the actor who plays the cop is just BAD lololol. like what in the 2 facial expressions nonsense?? shoulda kept the mask on

19. the tight rope game was cool but dragged on a little too long for me. i think it’s bc the VIPs fucking suck LOL. i was REALLY looking for gangster dude to finally be revealed as a spineless fuck but NOOOOOO more bullying and intimidation. honestly so pathetic. 

20. gangster dude deserved to die due to his own failures IMO but NOOOOOO. i swear the “crazy” woman lasted as long as she did just so she could say his dick was small and some rando VIP could utter “hell hath no fury like a woman scorned”. i’m sorry i rolled my eyes so hard at that scene, doesn’t she have a newborn baby?? LOLOLOL like what a pathetic way to die, sorry.

21. FRONTMAN IS LEE BYUNG HYUN??? LMAOOOOO!!! i mean what in the cameo?? it was impossible for me to see him as frontman after that “luke i am your father” moment. and the irony of byung hyun playing role is just extra rich given that he was literally blackmailed in a similar squid game story IRL. and where is she now? and where is he now? hmmmmm

22. and again i have to express my rage. seobyeok randomly getting injured by the blown up glass (literally WHY??) just to struggle eat and bleed out LMAO. and then be “mercy killed” by sang woo’s stank ass JUST to give gihun the motivation he’d need to kill sang woo?? fucking foul. the ONLY COMPETENT FEMALE CHARACTER and they couldn’t even do her the dignity of going out through a game. they literally kill her to further the plot of her male counterparts. awful

23. i mean by the time the final game comes, ngl squid game completely lost me as an audience. i just didn’t care anymore. and like who am i supposed to be rooting for anyway? the asshole sang woo who's in debt bc of a blue collar crime? or the asshole gihun who’s in debut due to a gambling addiction that literally left his own mother unable to financially take care of her sickness?

24. HOW exactly are either of them suffering at the hands of capitalism again?

25. i was so happy when the fight ended and gihun was finally ended up the victor, not bc i wanted him to win i was just tired of the psuedo-moralism he randomly developed at the very end. like give this man his money and wrap this shit up.

26. j/k he comes back home to a mother he left to die and then wallows in misery for a year even tho he promised sang woo and seobyeok (also why ali’s wife and child wasn’t important enough to include on this list is very telling but whatever) that he’d take care of their families, he becomes a drunk instead.

27. like i WANT to feel sorry for gihun bc trauma but i literally do not care. like the ONE TIME he should actually be putting others before himself and he STILL can’t do it

28. oh but look a squid game card! THAT’s what spurns him to action. not atoning for the lives lost but the concept of getting revenge...for a game...that he actively participated in...knowing that they’d kill contestants indiscriminately LOL. like i literally cant. i get why he’s angry but here he is with a second shot at life and it’s like the only change in his character is MORE TRAUMA™

29. i feel bad for seobyeok’s little brother most of all. sitting there thinking his sister abandoned him FOR A YEAR poor thing

30. i felt the scene with the old man was unnecessary and went on for too long. but then again at that point i’d lost complete interest in the show so LOL

31. i mean honestly gihun gambling AGAIN with someone’s life just to prove the old man wrong LOL. i thought he felt guilty? i thought he was traumatized? why do the writers keep trying to frame him as heroic when he’ll throw everything away to gamble EVERY. TIME.?????

32. so one midlife crises dye job later and gihun is so desperate to not be a father that he enters squid game again. for revenge or whatever LOL

*whew* my goodness, i think i needed to get that out.

like i found squid game wildly entertaining overall but the ending but absolute trash. and i just dont care enough about gihun to want more story from him, he really should’ve gotten on the plane.

i also find it interesting that ppl saw the show as a critique on capitalism when really i felt like it doubled down on it. but maybe that’s just me idk. regardless, i’m happy for the show’s success. better squid game at number one than fucking bridgerton LMAO.

[the-fandom-fuckup]

Kirikacchako? Please

I'm not sure if this is referencing a specific prompt from like.. An older post or not, but I've been on a bit of an au kick lately so I'm gonna use this as a plug for some of the aus/ideas I've had, so I hope that's alright ^-^

(I'd offer a doodle for your troubles but... I don't have any to offer rn gjskfksjfkak)

One of the most recent ideas I've had is Kirichako sirens x hoh/ace pirate Baku, in which Kirichako are a mated pair of sirens that travel the seas together to prey on unsuspecting sailors and Baku is a pirate that spends a bit too much time around the cannons n explosives, resulting in hearing loss over time

Upon meeting Baku for the first time Kiri n Ochako are both fascninated and peeved. Fascinated bc no one's ever looked them in the eyes during their song and resisted them like he has, and peeved bc immediately after staring at them Baku tried killing them with explosives

Like sure, they've met people on the seas that have been resistent to either their song or bodies before, but never someone who was unaffected by both. They didn't know whether to be more interested or insulted honestly

((They go with interested, but tell themselves they're insulted bc it's easier to admit))

N honestly I don't have much here, but they end up following Baku's ship around bc it has some good benefits (provides them with protection from bigger sea creatures, food from all the ships they destroy/people they fuck up), and also they just like bothering Baku until they get a reaction from him

They don't sing to him anymore, but they chitter at him n throw pretty sea trinkets up against the ship/into open cannon flaps for him to find later

The last thing I have for this idea is the courting process probably starts bc Baku tripped on the sea trinkets one too many times while carrying out his duties n gets pissed, so he goes up to the main deck to get their attention before chucking some sparkly, garbage thing back at them hoping to distract them enough to get them to fuck off. But the sirens look at their new gift and go wait... Returned gift?? A courting gift?? Which goes to kickstarts a whole new wave of bullshit lmao, rip Baku's sanity

Another idea I wanna shoehorn these guys into is my EnjiRei/TodoDeku mafia bodyguard au, but I'm not too sure on how to go about it tbh like

One one hand, I could have Kiri in with the Todorokis n Ochako in with All Might's group, and have Baku be the unsuspecting civilian just trying to live his life but has attracted the attention of both gang members, who then treat it as a rivalry of who gets Baku first but end up seeing each other as more than just rival groups when the gangs actually start working together n they get paired to run jobs, and has everyone spiralling into a mess of feelings and highjinks before leveling out to smth manageable

On another hand I could have a similar idea with Kacchako as the rivaling gang members and Kiri as the unsuspecting civilian, or maybe even some other underground member like an underground ring fighter or a runner or whatever, who gets scouted by the groups bc his reputation in the ring gets him a gig as some extra muscle or smth for an outside job

And then on the last hand I could have pre-established Kiribaku as the gang members (in the same gang this time) and Ochako as the civilian making bad deals with shady people for extra cash to try and help her family out of their shitty finacial situation, taking jobs she has no business taking (probably from the rising group that's fucking up everything for everyone else tbh) n catching the boys' attention bc "what's a pretty little thing like you doing in the sleazy part of town? Don'tcha know shit gets dangerous around here?" And they're endeared by her spunk n unwillingness to crumble under pressure so they take her under their wing to show her the ropes but also gives them their kicks bc they get off on corrupting her innocent n naive moral compass, all while being hunted by the other group bc she ditched their jobs n now has to face the consequences or smth, Idk idk

It would help if I had any understanding of how mobs/organised crime shit worked or even watched those kinds of shows/movies lmaofnakfmdjs

I'll finish it off with the modern fantasy au I've been thinking about bc I love it dearly, staring alpha werewolf Baku, alpha dragon Kiri, and bamf witch Ochako

At some point or other Baku gets the entire Bakusquad + Deku, Tetsu, Camie, and Ochako living in his packhouse bc he takes a great deal of pride in caring for his pack members and it's actually really easy for his alpha to categorise people as pack, but you'd have to pull out all his teeth before he admits it

Some of them just decided they lived there now n didn't leave, but both Kiri (+Tetsu) and Ochako were brought in by Baku bc his alpha's love language is acts of service/providing and clearly they both benefitted from the move so "why tf are you making such a big deal about it?? Just pack your shit n get it moved in, you've got a week"

Kirikacchako dance around each other hardcore in this au, to the exasperation of everyone else. The alphas try to play off their urges to provide n scentmark as subtly as possible, and since Ochako isn't aware of the meaning it goes pretty well. But literally everyone else is rolling their eyes n making bets on how long it takes them to get their shit together lmaojdidudj

A scene I have pictured for them (and the first one I came up with for this au) is Ochako going out somewhere and Kiri n Baku both casually scent her before she heads out, thinking they're all slick n shit. But as soon as she leaves Deku levels them with the most deadpan expression he can make n says "that was the least subtle thing I've ever seen in my life", and as Baku snaps n goes "I dunno what you're talking about" Kiri replies with a smug "I wasn't trying to be😏"

And like. Realistically the alphas know Ochako isn't really an omega, but she does share some traditional omega qualities that have their alphas going wild (period cycle=heat cycle, round n squishy but will fight you=strength n size for providing healthy pups + the ability to protect them, etc.) so it's understandable that their alphas would slip up n refer to her as their omega, right? Right??

It also doesn't help that after taking Ochako with them on full moon runs, she's been chatting with some of the betas n omegas there and asking how to better communicate with the boys (to avoid miscommunication, she says). But they've both marked her so much that the betas n omegas think she's their courted omega, so they teach her vocal cues n what they mean coming from an alpha, and teach her how to purr and chirp in response.

They don't think to mention the significance behind some of the cues they teach her bc why would they? Smelling as strongly as she does, there's no way those alphas aren't going to give her their bite n bond with her. Why would they need to explain some of the more provocative noises they teach her? They're just helping her for when her alphas decide it's the right time to mate her, is all

I haven't gotten around to how their tension n dancing breaks, but it does eventually n they do get together n bond and all that good stuff, and eventually they have werewolf/dragon/magic hybrid babies bc I have quirkbabes design in another au n I'm obviously dropping them into every au I possibly can bc I love them n put a lot of work into them (and they're super pretty, so I'm showing them off where ever I can assuming I actually draw smth for this au eventually rip)

And wow, this is getting kinda long n rambly so I'm gonna end it here, but I hope that this was kinda what you were looking for landkwidjdkwbf

If you wanna know more about any of the aus just let me know, I could ramble forever

Or if you have any other kirikacchako ideas you wanna hear about feel free to drop them off, I don't mind!! ^-^

[prose-for-hire]

Ats headcanons

I enjoyed doing the btvs characters, so I thought I would do some hcs for working in a store they frequent and meeting Angel characters, perhaps an obstacle to your relationship and how things would develop thereafter. 

[Yes, there is some overlap with some of the characters that I did for the btvs hcs but it’s different stores and scenarios and a lot of the characters have had a bit of development since then!]

Warning: Spoilers for probably every season. Sex reference (only in one or two). Reader is cheated on by someone else in one hc.

I feel like these are slightly darker themes in some just cos the show is a little more like that than btvs. Some are so long I might as well have written out a fic but I like doing lots of different characters at once.

Feel free to request Hcs for any buffyverse characters I enjoy doing these !! 💖

Angel:

- Independent book store - He likes to go and buy from independent stores, he doesn’t trust buying from the internet - You are always extra helpful and you don’t mind that he’s usually quiet apart from thanking you - You often tell him if you’ve read one of the books and you liked it, or you tell him to tell you if its any good - You only ever see him in the dark or by the glow of the dimly lit store - He seems lonely to you, insular - You always enjoy that first Sunday evening of the month, because he pretty much comes in regularly - He really enjoys hearing you talk, you have lots of opinions on literature and the characters and some of them, he had never heard not in the centuries he had been around - You interested him and he liked that you didn’t know anything about demons, it meant he could feel almost human for the first time in a long time - You were his secret, none of his friends knew that he now exclusively shopped there because it meant he could see you, he had started talking just as much as you did - Sometimes, he cleared his whole evening and he would find himself caught in such an interesting conversation with you that time would fly by and you were supposed to have closed the store hours ago - He offers to drive you home, you accept happily and you really get on he might even invite you in and allow you to stay over if it gets too late (he would 100% take the couch no arguments srry) - So someone either barges in that morning or they insist they need to go to the bookstore with him next time he goes - I’m guessing Wes or Cordy - Both would sense the familiarity between you straight away and squint at him, checking if he’s gone evil because his face is actually contorted into a… pleasant smile - Either way they’ll start running their mouth about demons and angel will panic and pull them away leaving you confused - He’ll have to hurry away to take care of some demon, neither of you can stop thinking of the other for the full week - He’ll come in, sheepish, having to explain himself. Demons, all that. Probably feel guilty if he didn’t tell you he was a vampire too (cue an explanation of the curse) - You’ll surprise him, shrug, and ask if he wants to get a drink after your shift - First date of many, you might even join angel investigations after a while (not just bc you’re now in a very committed relationship with the boss)

Spike:

- You work in an electronics store. - His PlayStation stopped working (he threw it out of the window when he lost) so he’s demanding you fix it - You tell him it’s a write off. But you show him some good deals on a new one. - He smiles, thinking you were flirting, but it’s something you are supposed to do for your job - He pays with a debit card, that says it belongs to ‘Angel investigations’ - You presume he’s the named Angel, and say ‘Thanks Angel’ as he leaves - He turns back, starting to scowl, but then realises what’s happened. He keeps up the pretence so that Angel doesn’t figure out he’s taken the company card - He’s pretty lonely, so when he’s not swearing at his PlayStation, he’s thinking about the brief interaction with you at the store - He comes in a few more times, asking about accessories or extras he may need to make him win better - He sticks around for slow evenings sometimes. You start to chat to him, getting to know him, always giving him the warmest smile - Your hands probably brush against each other when you’re showing him something and he cannot stop smiling – it’s been the best thing that’s happened since he became corporeal again. Human touch. Your touch - Finally asks you out, you decide you’d love to spend time with him - There’s only one problem - You think his name’s Angel. So, he spends most of the evening telling you wild and very obviously made up stories about being an investigator and then becoming a CEO. - You go into a bar together and who should interrupt but the real Angel and he keeps calling your Angel by the name Spike. - You frown, having had enough and he’s caught up in some demon killing so he can’t come after you - He is too embarrassed for a while to talk to you again, but eventually waits for you after work - He explains everything, you roll your eyes and smile. The times you actually liked him had been when he was himself at the store. He would come in making you laugh and insulting customers under his breath to make you smile - You agree to have a do-over, introducing yourself again and smiling softly as he holds your hand under the counter before he continues to mutter his insults towards the customers.

Cordelia:

- You work for a temp agency, Angel investigations takes you on in their busy period (LA demons don’t listen to the curse of Halloween so it can get busy) - Real busy - So you are drafted in temporarily to help pick up calls - You have experience and you know all about demons (you used to live on a Hellmouth) - Cordy doesn’t get on with you at first, thinking you’re too perfect taking over her job - She wants her wage and its stretched thinner with a new employee - You reorganise the filing, make detailed notes and are really good on calls to potential clients - And you’re really friendly with her and she finds herself enjoying your company but she still gets suspicious of how good you are at her job - aka she gets a little jealous and it boils over one evening and she starts to ask Angel how long it’ll be until you leave - You overhear, ofc, and Angel’s eyes widen making Cordy turn and see your hurt face - And she feels really guilty when she sees she’s upset you - You just walk past her, pass Angel the files you had finished, and took your jacket to leave - Angel and Wes talk to Cordy, hinting that a lot of her attention has been on you recently – maybe she should think about why that is - You call in sick the next few days, thinking about checking if you can change your contract and be transferred somewhere else. She can’t stop thinking about you - When you’re finally back in, you start the day off in silence, trying to keep up your usual cheery phone voice - Cordelia comes straight in and apologises, handing you a hot drink exactly the way you like it - She hangs the call up that you were on, clicking the button in, losing you a client but this is more important - She tells you that she really likes you and she didn’t realise until she hurt you how much you meant to her in such a short time - She wants to know if she can make it up to you with maybe a dinner date? Say, tonight at that new place - Angel knows someone and helped her get reservations and you agree that it’s the least she could do which makes her smile

Wesley: 

(sorry this isn’t in the best moment of his character arc)

- Hardware store - You get suspicious when he’s buying a list of things that makes you think he might be doing something he shouldn’t - You honestly don’t get paid enough for this, but you had to confront him in the car park for your own moral conscience - He has purchased a bucket, some rope, heavy-duty chains and a large mallet - So you shout, ‘Hey! Are you planning on killing someone?’ (you’re not great with tact) - He whips around so fast and stalks towards you it honestly scares you - He has a certain level of menace, like the English villains in cartoons - “That, would be none of your business” he mutters, realising he would have to go back in and buy more if he wanted to keep you in his closet too - “You know, if it’s something supernatural you might need more than a mallet” you offer, you can tell when someone’s seen something supernatural. Something behind their eyes - He just shakes his head and leaves, but all the while he’s apart from you he can’t stop thinking about you - He glares at the woman he has held hostage, wishing she would just give up her information do he could find Angel - He finds himself walking back to the hardware store - Some dithering excuse about the strength of the chains or wanting you to show him some alternative rope - Gets into a conversation with you about either how you know about demons or why you thought he was gonna kill people - You tell him very obviously he is at least holding a hostage, it makes him crumble slightly - He’s been through a lot, what with the almost dying. Twice - He tells you to follow him and you shrug, chucking your apron at your friend on shift, asking him to cover you - You spoke in the shadows, not able to see each others faces. He told you everything, like everything since he had moved to the U.S, Sunnydale, everything. - He could tell there was something about you, I mean asking him if he was gonna kill someone? You were intelligent, perceptive and to him: better than the job you were in - You then told him of your own darkest moments - Bonded through this, you parted ways, but your minds never left that spot. Never left each other - You met up regularly after this, you hinting that he should probably let the woman go now. Maybe there could be another way to find his boss - Then one day she was gone, his mood lifted and he pulled you into him and landed a kiss - You start dating, helping him sort through everything and you probably eventually join Angel Investigations, Wesley thinks you’re better suited with him anyway

Gunn:

- You serve coffee at a local diner 24 hour diner.

- He comes in every Friday, but he’ll start coming in more regularly when he spots you behind the counter

- After his shifts, before his shifts for a morning coffee even if he’s late into the office

- Finds himself spending more money than is feasible on eating out just because you’re there

-  Decides he had better ask you out. So he does.

- Very cool, very collected

- you can’t help smiling at the way he’s leaning ever-so-cool across the counter

- You’re so pleased he likes you, he had definitely caught your eye, and you jump at the chance to go on a date with him

- There’s only one problem: he finds out you’re half demon and you have a big hatred for a certain mystical law firm that had ruined your family

- He’s cool with the half-demon thing, but it does mean he’s lying about where he works now

- He likes you too much to ruin it over anything like a job

- But one day, after dating a few months, you find out. You were summoned to a meeting at the top floor of the building, the only one that could translate as you passed for human

- There was some misunderstanding over the sacrificial killings being presumed murder by the CEO and his team

- You walked in to find your boyfriend shuffling his papers waiting for this translator he didn’t want to have to deal with

- This results in an argument in front of the whole team and your extended family who don’t really get what’s going on

- You storm away and Angel lets your family off due to the bad publicity he’s informed will take place if they do anything else

- Gunn lets you cool off but eventually can’t stay away and comes into your work and you try to ignore him

- he follows you into the back, apologising over your boss who is shouting at him for coming into the employee-only area

- he takes your shoulders, looks into your eyes and promises he’s working there for the right reasons, telling you that he’s on the right side of this but if you asked he could see about looking for different employment

- he wouldn’t stop saving the world, but he could transfer to some kind of ‘consultancy’ status

- you smile, appreciating the gesture but insist that he shouldn’t lose his job for you. You accept his apology and start to make things work - promising to be honest from then on

- he kisses you, cupping your cheek and moving your head towards him, the verbal promise sealed with the kiss you shared

Fred:

-  you’re a barista in a coffee shop

- she’s always in early mornings and late nights, sometimes you open a little later knowing she’ll want her coffee with extra cream and sugar

- she always bashfully thanks you, insisting you shouldn’t have waited, so you have to admit seeing her is often the highlight of your day

- she’ll blush and shake her head, sipping slowly on her drink. She’ll grin and say it’s exactly how she likes it (you had it waiting for her, she didn’t have to order)

-  you get to know her over the months she’ll pop in, becoming a really close friend of hers.

- which soon leads into more, both of you being very affectionate. It comes so naturally         

- problem is that the tension in her office could be cut with a knife. Almost everyone had a crush on her, whether she was aware of it or not

- you became very insecure, distancing yourself from her after you noticed

- thinking maybe she would be better off with one of the others. she was so upset, her brow furrowing and her work not being her best

- she felt alone again, like she had when she was trapped on Pylea. she just wanted to speak to you about it but she couldn’t. she didn’t get why you were being so cold

- One day you notice one of the men in the lab harassing her at work when you pop in (your coffee store does deliveries now) and you cuss him out

- she smiles, grateful. Her nose scrunching as she smiled. You nod awkwardly, handing her drink and leaving which makes her deflate a little (she wanted you to stay)

- finally, she comes in on her day off - which is odd cos it’s so far from her apartment. she tells you she wants to spend time with you and she wants to know why you suddenly stopped seeing her

- you explain everything, on your break. She shakes her head and smiles fondly at your explanation. 

- she promises the only one she has eyes for is you. You grin and she insists you should have spoken to her about it sooner

- you mysteriously come down with an ‘illness’ after your break and ask to take the rest of the day off and spend it in bed with Fred

Lorne:

- you work in an exclusive theatre, work in the ticket office for premiers

- You see Lorne a lot and always give him a winning smile

- He knows you by name straight away, he’s a people person

- But it was so more than that, he was absolutely entranced by you but you couldn’t tell - he was always around celebrity types what with his job so you felt like he wouldn’t want to look at you twice

- he always stopped to talk to you, savouring the moment you had together

- he was thinking of asking you to dinner, or to accompany him to a premier one time instead of you mostly staying in the ticket office

- however one time, before he had chance to ask, he brought a friend with him. Wesley

- he talked to you, Lorne visibly tense at the way he took a shine to you

- you start to date Wesley on and off after that evening,  

- Lorne gets annoyed at the way he treats you, dropping you any time that Fred so much as gave him a second glance

- you felt lonely and sad, the only person able to cheer you up being Lorne

- he kept you company a lot, growing so close to the point you trusted him more than anyone. You were so comfortable with him, in the way 

- he desperately wants to hold you in his arms, take care of you the way that you deserve

- one evening you say that you had better leave, Wes was supposed to be taking you out

- you walk to his office and find Wes kissing Fred. You scream, shout and then storm away

- Lorne hears the commotion, following you out and scooping you up and holding you into him 

- the warmest embrace one you didn’t ever want to move from

- he stayed with you for months, building you back up for entirely selfless reasons. 

- one day, way after everything that happened with Wes, he looks at you and his feelings let slip

 - you smile, shocked. You hadn’t realised he felt that way - you had thought you would never have a chance with someone like him. You tell him this and and pulls you close

- you kiss, the passion that has been building since the day you met finally pouring between you. You both smile at each other and you pull him in again for another kiss

Doyle:

- You work the register in a liquor store

-  He came in fairly often, the hard stuff the only thing that would help with the visions

- you like his humour, and his accent, and he always has a smile for you even if he’s had a crap day

- he really likes you but he doesn’t know how to tell you

- won’t shut up about you to Angel. So much so that even Angel was gonna march him over to your store and demand he ask you to put him out of his misery

- but luckily, you took a shine to him so you were the one doing the asking. Or, more hinting that you would be getting off your shift soon and that you could share one of his fine bottles of cheap liquor if he wanted company

- almost choked on his words in his enthusiasm, so he just nods and waits for you to grab your stuff

- you spend a lot of time just talking, sharing intimate details and connecting

- his irish lilt was music to your ears and he smiled in that boyish way he does when you tell him this

- You finish a bottle and since that night, he’s addicted. He wants to spend all of his time with you

- He keeps the visions secret at first, but eventually one night he has a bad one – needs to see Angel and you tell him he needs to rest

- You worry, but he’s insistent

- So you come with him and find out about the demons that you had never quite managed to notice before

-  He shares, explains about everything while he’s holding you in his arms. Only thing is he manages to avoid the fact that he’s half demon himself.

- You become closer, noticing Angel and Cordelia (you were friends with them both now kind of) seemed to be hinting he needed to tell you something

- You only caught whispers, the end of conversations but you decided to ask him

- He avoided the question, he didn’t feel good enough. He didn’t want to lose you, you were too important to him – he thought you finding out he was demon would make you run a mile

- And then, one evening he had left to help at Angel Investigations when there was a knock at the door. It was a spiky green demon, apparently a distant relative of your guy

- You invited the demon in, making sure to be the perfect host(/ess)

-  Doyle eventually came in, eyes wide and panicked when he saw the relative. You continued to pour the tea, offering him a cup which he declined and went straight for the hard stuff

- The relative stayed the night, at your insistence, and when you and Doyle went into his room to sleep you asked him to show you that part of him

- He reluctantly did, incredibly embarrassed. But you just kissed him softly and slipped into bed, patting the other side for him to join you

- He grinned, thanking his lucky stars and your relationship only grew from there

Harmony:

- You serve at a Demon bar.

- You make drinks and various cocktails of slime and blood

- Starts as a fling, she doesn’t expect it to be anything more

- Sometimes she’ll talk down to you or start nibbling on your neck. You get on at her to stop, she knew you were human to begin with

- She tries to use sex to distract you, but you want the romance too

- She isn’t used to people wanting a romantic relationship, so she expects you just want sex like her past relationships

- When she realises how soft you can be and how much she enjoys it, things change

- Harmony slowly starts moving her stuff in, suggesting brunch and calling you cheesy pet names that you find adorable.

- You find yourself excited about this, she appears well-meaning and she’s very sweet with you. A little bit fang-happy sometimes but you can let that slide

- You treat her with kindness that she isn’t accustomed to in relationships, she decides because of this its true love. Like in a romance novel.

- Absolutely not used to such kindness.

- You’re happy with her excitement, not because she was treated so bad, but because she feels for you like you feel for her.

- When she double-crosses the people she was supposed to be loyal to, you have a big argument

- You love her, but she relies on the ‘I’m a vampire’ excuse and won’t take responsibility

- There’s a rough patch and both of you are so upset without the other

- But she comes back to the home you shared one evening, calling you the sweetest pet-names and apologising in her own way

-  You accept, continuing to date and explore a healthy relationship, trying to help her with her own self-worth too

Lindsey:

-  Gas station

- You have served him both on his way in and out of town, the many times he has left and come back

- You don’t usually remember customers, but you do remember customers that have the seeming ability to grow back hands

- You were always kind to him, maybe a little extra friendly but he never usually stayed to chat

- He had been in a bad mood the last time you saw him, but he had nodded at you before he left

- He was coming back into town again this time, stopping for gas and you hadn’t thought you would see him again

- It had been such a long time, you figured he had finally moved away for good. You liked making up stories about the customers that stopped by, it made time go a little faster on slow nights

- Tonight you were on your break when he rolled up in his truck, looking pleased with himself

-  You were outside, catching some fresh air and he struck up conversation. He had a glint in his eye, some purpose he was coming back for

- He smiled, actually started sweet-talking you. It appeared that he had you in his memory too

- He asked if you wanted to see each other, now he was moving back to LA

- You have nothing to lose so you say yes agreeing to drinks to see where things went

- Things start out good, for a while. Until he asks you to quit your job and get a job and infiltrate a formerly evil law firm

- You have no experience, no anything but he manages to swing it for you. He just wants you to watch them, for now

- You realise you feel like you’re being used, there’s more to the plan than you realise

- You come home one night, a black eye after Angel ‘asks’ you if you know anything about the amulet – some girl that’s supposed to be dead said you weren’t the real liaison with the senior partners

- Lindsey apologises, gets mad at them for being cruel to you. Tells you everything, his plans, his reasoning. Says he wants to hurt them more now they’ve done this to you.

- He cant stop apologising while he holds you close to him in bed

- He loves you, he tells you and you choose to trust him. feeling it so intimately

-  He looks out for you and he’s protective of you if you come with him to Wolfram and Hart ever

- Instead of getting caught up on the fight he catches your eye and decides, for the last time, to leave LA this time – he wants to take you with him

Lilah:

- Hotel check in. you’re a receptionist who basically runs the place

- Lilah’s having sex with someone senior for information that will get her a promotion

- You’re always nice to her, she’s always short with you

- One day you snap, asking why she’s such a bitch. You weren’t usually like this, but you had a bad day and it suddenly came out

- She smiled, arching an eyebrow and just turned to leave satisfied that nobody is as nice as you had been pretending to be

- She had been pushing your buttons on purpose, seeing how long it would be until you snapped

- It had surprised her and been a couple of months of her being rude to you

- she smiled, saying her door would be open if you wanted to do something about it

- It of course, started off with an angry passion, sex just because you could. for convenience and just to get frustrations out (from both of your jobs)

- It was easy for both of you, but suddenly after a while of your arrangement you let something slip in the throws of passion

- The ‘L’ word

- Boy was she mad at you for saying it. Shoving you almost off the bed, snatching up her clothes and calling you pathetic before she stormed away

- she refused to answer you calls after this, for a while. You didn’t realise she was scared of her won feelings that surfaced when you said what you did

- You came to her work, she threatened to call security but you mentioned a few confidential cases she had left around the hotel room that you managed to cast a glance over

- she agreed to let you into her office so you could talk

- and surprisingly, you did. She tried her best to keep you at arms length but the promise of someone to actually care about her with no ulterior motives was too much

- she agreed to meet you that night, the first tentative feeling of a relationship coursing through you, hopefully you could convince her to take a chance on you

[thoughtfullyyoungduck]

This is awkward

Summary: could u maybe do a reddie x daughter where she gets her period, but wants to hide it from richie and eddie bc they’re guys, so she steals richie’s phone and calls bev for help. but like as she goes over to bevs house (maybe they live close) richie and eddie think she’s missing or lost and they freak out? i just feel like that’s such a reddie situation lmao

warnings: period talks 

In retrospect, she really should have seen it coming. All the signs they taught you about in health class presented themselves full force, from having abdominal pain and a bloating stomach after eating a cracker, to using the bathroom more than she usually has to. 

Never the less, it remained a shock when she wakes up at five in the morning to searing throbbing in her lower abdomen that leaves her helplessly whriting. The clock strikes six am at the exact moment she groans, curling her body into a fetal position and covering her stomach with her arms.

She lays still for a while, tossing and turning in an effort to find a pose that won’t hurt, but nothing helps, and so she decides to go to the medicine cabinet and fish out medication to reduce the ache. In order to do that, she removes the heavy silk comforter off her body, and shivers as her temperature reduces from the added coldness that sticks in the room. It’s nearing summer time, so the sun is gleaming up every last detail of the room even at six o’clock, rendering the lightbulb hanging from the ceiling useless.

She gets up, and as soon as turns around to readjust the comforter out of the corner of her eye she spots a red blood stain, soaked into the covers of her one person bed. Ellie’s first instinct is, embracingly enough, to cry, the sight of blood leaving her squeamish and ready to do whatever it takes to get rid of it.

Her pain tolerance is high, but the second a blotch of blood presents itself anywhere near or on her, it needs to be removed point black.  

It clicks in her mind what this situation means and what the logical explanation is, but she’s still in a daze that allows her to calmly rip the covers of the bed an paddle downstairs to the washing area, carefully avoiding to touch the blood itself, free of any panic or discomfort, beside the continues stabbing sneers. Only after disposing of the covers in the washing machine and shutting it with a small click, she sobers up and worries.

Ellie grabs a towel of a mountain of dry-cleaned clothes that Richie was ordered to organize room by room but forgot after a last minute stand up show the night before and wraps it around her middle. The towel specifically is her favorite, colored blue with the animations of winx club printed upon it, as a child her favorite cartoon show, with her name embroider on the top thanks to her uncle Mike. A trait she copied from Richie was that she lost stuff so much that Eddie got sick of it and started writing her name on article of clothes and shoes so that if someone found it they returned it to the right person, and because at the time Mike was practicing embroidery, he sowed her name in the towel as a gift.

The edges of the towel are worn out and frayed, but the texture is soft to the touch and smells like sunscreen, in a way tied to a few of Ellie’s preferred treasured memories. It’s the only at hand though, and time is of the essence, and she wants to wants desperately to avoid any more blood spillage.

Scanning the floor while hurrying to a bathroom Ellie cautions that she stays upright and doesn’t hit her toe against the doorframe like she idioticly does time and time again. She reaches the bathroom she unlocks the door from its hinches and opens it soundlessly, her parents lost in dreamland a door over. She feels weirdly docile about the whole thing, not at all trembling or making rash decision like she foresaw whenever she thought of this moment. The bathroom door shuts behind her, and she silently awaits for any sound to emerge from Eddie and Richie’s bedroom, but none materialize, thankfully.

At that point, there’s not much she can do. The house is empty of anything remotely resembling pads, with Richie and Eddie not needing them and Ellie hadn’t required them so far either.

Having two fathers is a blessing that Ellie is magnificently proud of, and most of the time she forgets that core families usually exist of one father and a mother. Richie and Eddie fill up any void that a mom could possibly leave behind, and so she is often oblivious that her home situations isn’t ‘normal’. There is nothing that a mother adds that Richie and Eddie don’t provide her, but maybe this is the one exception.

Ellie learned about menstrual cycles and how to deal with them via sex ed in school, but at home not a word was ushered about this. Unintentional no doubt, since Richie took it upon himself to bring up as much cringe-worthy conversations to shy her away from trying anything stupid. She never brought the topic up, and it must have slipped from Richie and Eddie’s mind too.

She debates waking up Richie and Eddie to drive her to the store, but it’s too early for that, the sops opens at nine, and there honestly sounds nothing worse but rousing her fathers for something like a period.

Richie will joke, and Eddie will research the whole thing down to the smallest details to aid her with all the knowledge found on the internet, but what she would really benefit from is a girl simply explaining the whole thing to her.

The solution literally falls in her lap, as Ellie accidentally knocks over the parfum Beverly left behind last time she visited. Aunt Bev and uncle Ben live two streets away, in a giant modern home they fosters pets in, at the edge of a forest.

They reside there any time they aren’t on their boat travelling around the world, but with Beverly six months into her pregnancy, they swore to not go on any outings up to the birth of their very first child.

Both Ben and Bev work every weekday, but if Bev is home, she’ll be happy to help, Ellie is certain. She should call first, to let Bev know she was on her way and to ensure Bev won’t contact the police on her, a figure appearing out of the blue early morning might not present well. The only problem with that is that Ellie’s phone was dropped in the water of a bath, cracking the phone’s screen from the hard landing and drenching it in water, causing all the phone’s functions to give out.

Calling aunt Bev is only an option if Ellie locates a phone, and her best bet on that is her pops.

Richie obsesses over his phone, and while he says that’s not the case, Eddie humorously hid it once and it send Richie in such a frenzy he explored the whole house top to bottom and discarded any and all cabinets to locate it.

Eddie chides the overexercise usage and resorts to conking Richie over the head if he dares to divided his attention to it for over ten minutes, but it’s all in a loving way, Eddie wouldn’t ever dream of hurting Richie.

A compromise was formed, Richie promising to leave his phone unattended on the bedside table at the end of the bed, and Eddie dialing down his complaints. The phone can’t ramify it’s toxic radiation from that far, but it’s close enough that the alarm clock rouses them up if necessary.

Invading Richie and Eddie’s bedroom is a dangerous game to play at, Eddie’s hearing out of this world with precision and picking up on the smallest, barely there clamor, but assisted with a tad of luck, Ellie might be able to evade waking them. After all, she’d rather get caught sneaking in, than having to provide a valid reason she ought to shop.

------

The clock strikes eight a.m. when Richie stirs awake, the light streaming through the window in such a way it glistens directly in Richie eyes, and in order to avoid it he swivels around on his stomach. His arm covers Eddie side, snoring loudly right net to his ear. Huffing out a laugh, Richie retracts his arm to cover his eyes from the sun that maliciously demands him to wake.

Eddie sniffles, his hand lifting in search for Richie and sighing happily when his fingertips bump against Richie’s shoulder, tugging his arm back in position.

‘Too early’, he grumbles, smacking his lips to rid himself of his dry mouth and burying his head further into his pillow. Richie laughs, kissing his husbands bare shoulder and readjusting Richie’s shirt he’s wearing after.

Weekends are a synonymous with rest and sleep, but Richie starts the day bright and fresh anyway, cooking a giant breakfast with Ellie to lure Eddie out of bed under the guise of food.

It strikes Richie as odd that Ellie’s not up and about it yet, he strains to hear any movement in the house but he comes up empty.

‘Aren’t you gonna make me breakfast, babe?’ Eddie asks his lips curled in a teasing smile, accustomed to their morning routine.

‘Sure thing Eds’, Richie says gooey, slobbering a kiss on the first part of Eddie he can reach, his temple, knowing that Eddie revolts the thought of kissing without brushing teeth first.

‘Wait I was kidding come back,’ Eddie whines, outstretching his arms to stop Richie from getting up but failing.

‘You’ll be so much happier when the food’s ready, trust me. I’m going to wake our munckin up too.’

He steps away from the bed, pulling his shirt, bunched up thanks to the wild gestures he performs in his sleep, down in the meanwhile and yawns so wide his jaw protests.

His limbs feel lose and relaxed of waking up not so soon ago, and they seem to be begging Richie to crawl back under the cover and cuddle with Eddie some more, but tour life stretched itself through all the aspects of Richie’s life these past months, and he really long for some time to spend with his daughter.

As he stumbles blindly, his hand scours the miniature table, but the only thing he can find are his glasses, neatly tucked away in what must have been Eddie’s doing after Richie zonked out.

At first he thinks he missed it, but then his glasses help him see clearly, and he notices that the phone is no longer there.

‘Hey, Eds?’

The only answer he receives is a grunt, muffled by the blankets Eddie hides under.

‘Did you hide my phone again?’ Richie asks, his eyebrows knitted together in confusion. Eddie shakes his head without looking up, napping on.

‘Huh’, Richie responds, deciding to let Eddie wake at his own terms. He probably ditched the phone somewhere and is drawing blank on where it could be, but it’ll be found again soon. With a deflated shrugs, Richie leaves the room to wake up his daughter, excited like a kid on Christmas to rope her into mischief.

Eddie huffs, forcing the blanket of off him and screwing his eyes open, scratching at a spot on his back that insistently itched all night.

Soon, Ellie will run in with coffee, with a meticulous steady head so none of it spills, and announce that breakfast is prepared. Some of it will be burned, other things will be so delicious Eddie will look forward to it every day of the week till he eats it again. Regardless of how good the food is, the most important thing is that it’s family time, and that no interruption or distractions occur but the laughter and unprovoqued leering both Richie, Ellie and Eddie gathered throughout the week.  

Eddie smiles contently, resting his eyes a tad longer and imagining the inviting warm smell flowing up from downstairs. What he gets instead is frantic running up the stairs, loud thuds that rattle the foundation and follow each other quickly, subsequently followed by the bedroom door ricocheting of it’s hinges.

The urgency behind it spooks Eddie, who scrambles out of bed before Richie manages to utter a word.

‘Ellie’s not here.’

----

‘Thank you for helping me aunt Bev’, Ellie reinforces Bev, who brought out mint tea and joined her on the sofa to watch tv.

The movie provided background noise to the conversation they previously held, Ellie a little intimidated otherwise.

‘Any time honey you know this.’

Bev smiles brightly enough that her pearl white teeth show, her hair in a braid swiped over her shoulder, she radiates happiness to a degree Ellie has never seen.

‘I love dad and pops, I do, but you know how they get’, Ellie grimaced, his hands twisting nervously in the hem of the shirt she wormed herself in on the way here. A laugh bubbles out of Bev, already nodding her head.

‘They mean well but yes. I’m glad you confided in me.’ On instinct, Ellie dropped her hand down to pet the soft fur of Ben and Bev’s dog, a lifelong companion to them but also to her. She swiped nothing but air, Ben took the dog on a walk in the park, leaving the two girls to discuss thing among themselves. It was sad she didn’t get a chance to say hi to them, but she figures she’ll visit again later.

‘I really should get going,’ Ellie starts, her hand enclosing the plastic bag filled with supplies Bev landed her gracefully. ‘Pops and I love arranging breakfast, so I should really get home before they wake up to me not hanging around the house.’

Bev blinked innocently, surprise grazing her features. ‘Well, it is nine am, will they not be awake yet?’

‘It’s not that late yet is it?’ Bev’s phone rings loudly, startling Ellie out of her stupor. Even from her angle on the phone, she deciphers her pops names before Bev announce that it’s Richie.

‘Oops’, Ellie mutters, grimacing as the severity of the situation begins to down on her. She’s in big trouble now. Accepting the call, Bev puts in on speaker, a hand apologetically stroking Ellie’s arm conveying that yes, Bev’s sorry, but Ellie might get killed today.

‘Beverly’, Eddie distraught voice shakes through the microphone. A sinking stone weighs Ellie down, flushed with guilt, she hadn’t thought she’d be here so long, she only counted a five minute drop by.

‘Do you know where Ellie is? She’s not in her room or in the backyard either.’ In the background something smashes to the floor, in addition to cursing that sounds more like roaring, and Richie running out.

‘I really think she snatched my cellphone. Maybe she called someone to pick her up?’

Bev attempts to capture their attention goes unheard, the bickering between Eddie and Richie hardly begun.

‘I fucking told you Richie, dump the goddamn phone so much.’

‘How the fuck is that my fault? It has nothing do with that’, Richie argues frustrate, it’s obvious from the way he snapped back at Eddie he is equally as overwrought as Eddie.

‘You’re right, it’s mine. I’ve pushed her away by being to hands on. I should have given her more freedom to do what she wanted and I-‘

‘Eddie no. I honestly don’t think there’s anyone less strict as you. You remember when she was ten and she asked for two ice creams in a row and you just gave them to her because we were on a vacation?’

‘Stop dad. Pop’s right, I’m not running away for fuck sake’, Ellie yells out eventually, frustrated by the conversations taking place.

‘Ellie?’ A chair is pushed back and screeches across the floor, intending on the floor Eddie hammered on about being careful on.

‘Stay where you are, we’re on our way.’ Richie grounds out, seizing hold of his jacket and racing to the car. The connection then severs and dead silence is left in its wake.

‘Good luck with that.’

----

Though Bev, Ben, Eddie and Richie live nearby, Ellie is shocked by the fast response as the car halts not fully parked, Eddie and Richie jumping out in pajama’s.

Bev opened the door, so they waltz right on it without regarding Bev, seizing Ellie in a close knit hug both Richie and Eddie participate in.

‘Don’t you ever, ever scare us like that again. You hear me?’ Richie threatens, his words crackling with relief that his daughter is fine.

‘I’m sorry, I won’t. I honestly thought I would be back before you knew it.’

‘Why are you here in the first place?’ The family remains close, Eddie’s hand holding Ellie’s forearm loosely.

A blush shoots up her cheeks, coloring them bright red at the question. 

‘Yeah about that, Is it not enough for me to promise to never do this again?‘

[ziracona]

so can u tell us a little about ur characterization of Lisa?? What's she like inside and outside of trials? Does she have a lot of lucidity, what were her relationships with others like, would she ever get better, do you think? ( im SAD.) Just. What's she like!! Also, same for Sally? Oh! And I'm rly enjoying two songs by Meg Myers which maybe you'll like? Running up that hill (Cover) and Desire. Maybe check em out? :3 - Sleepy

Sure!

My Lisa is from a bit before the archives for her placed her (early 1970s), because I wrote ILM back when there was no date given for many killers or survivors, so I just hoped they were historically accurate with the things they did mention & went through a fairly exhaustive list of drained swamps in the Southern US & paddleboat makes & placed her according to that data (it’s been a bit so I don’t remember the exact date without looking up my notes) in the 1920s-1930s, I believe? And in her early 20s, since she’s described as a girl & young woman, which DbD usually does only for characters in their early 20s. (Which I’d still assume is her age, bc even though her archives, if you go by them, have her in her teens, they’re not connected to the events of her disappearance/definitely happened before them.)

In trials, Lisa has like 0 lucidity. I talk about this some in chapter notes, so I’ll try to give a quick overview instead but sry if I restart myself. She’s so starved that any time she sees a living being, she is just completely overcome with hunger and can’t do anything but operate on it. Very scary. Feral. Like being attacked by a starving animal. She’s super out of it, and is completely wild and violent and has no control, only the need to eat. Outside of trials, if no one is around, she’s lucid again, but will remember trials and what she did to people, and spends that time in horror and despair. She’s tried to kill herself before, because the last thing she ever wanted was to become the thing she swore vengeance on (the Entity’s a real cruel motherfucker. Did the same to Rin, to Philip, to everyone it could. Likes to really twist decent people into what they would most despair to be), but in the realm, she’s stuck as it. She’s not really aware for trials, but remembers them with decent clarity, and is in constant agony over what she’s done. Unfortunately, suicide does not take in the realm, and every one of her attempts failed, just like her attempts to maim or tie herself up so she wouldn’t be able to hurt people did. She’s horribly alone and despairing, and also in physical agony. She’s at the worst end of what a human can be at as far as emaciation and starvation while still being alive goes, and that’s physically awful. It fucks up your brain chemistry too, and everything is just really fucking miserable all the time. It hurts to move, it hurts to breathe, your breath smells tastes like rotten fruit but in a way that’s so much worth than that can sound. She’s so hungry, her addons are things like dragonfly wings consumed to give her extra stamina. That’s the kind of bare sliver of relief she ever gets. God, poor Lisa’s life is hell. She’s completely heartbroken and isolated and almost dead. As far as relationships go, she didn’t have any for a long time. No one can really interact with her, because she goes feral at the sight of food. She’s kinda utterly alone. But briefly, when Alex, Philip, Vigo, Benedict, and Sally were a group, she kind of got stumbled into, and after a kind of nasty first encounter, was able to regain lucidity around other people, and had a truly sweet and memorable and invaluable bit of time with love and friends and other people. She was kind of in love with Sally, who did her hair for her and was really kind to her, and Sally liked her too. They were close. Lisa was close with all of them. But when things ended the way they did, the Entity took that away. Lisa remembers it, but she could never get them or it back, and was cast aside and left behind until the end of ILM, when she finally got peace and found happiness in finally getting to be at rest in the arms of a friend. Overal, she’s a fairly young and wide-eyed, bright, cautious, fun and sweet girl by nature, now massively traumatized and hopeless and broken, but still with a truly incredible amount of that kind nature retained. She would have really loved reading fantasy novels aloud and exploring the worlds of lore and history, travelling, seeing other cultures and geographic features and animals. Enjoys fashion too, and has a heart for designing and making cool, personal and cultural and symbolic tied designs, and would have been both great at that and loved it if she’d lived long enough. (Shoutout to @artianaiolanthe who inspired the fashion take & it is so suited to her I love it). A little shy, but an extrovert at heart under it, just a nervous one. Loved people. Liked climbing trees and fording brooks and baking bread and throwing rocks and baseballs to knock a target out of a tree and win a prize at little town fairs. Didn’t get the length or quality of life she was owed, and it’s just not fair or okay at all. Liked to watch the stars.

As far as getting better goes, mentally, totally. If they could get her out of the realm or break the Entity’s connection, she’d immediately stop killing. She has never done it of her own free will. She’s a sweet small town kid who was just trying to live her life. As far as physically goes though, Lisa is in one of the worst possible spots. Unlike say Amanda, who was on death’s door but healed by the Entity, or the Legion, who weren’t injured at all, Lisa was on death’s door and like Adiris, did not get healed. Just preserved in that near-death state and forced to work in it. Honestly, it’s possible she could survive long enough to get to a hospital and be saved, but at best, she’d probably live another year. When you starve, your body begins to catabolize/eat your own tissue to save itself, starting with fat, and ending with muscles and organs, which, when it reaches the heart, kills you. Lisa was so close to dead, the organ damage was probably awful, and would leave her with complications that would take her very young. The most likely thing, since she was saved literally seconds before death, would be for her to step outside the realm and immediately die. However, it’s possible she got lucky on body damage and could be saved—kinda up to interpretation—and if say, she was around for Quentin’s Vigil going healing batshit, and got some organs repaired that way, she’d have a real shot. (I also am sad. Lisa was actually the only determinate character in ILM to me/that I wasn’t sure the ending for, and while I am very happy with what ended up being her closure, I also would like to see her live for even more love and peace TuT. Lol, if I ever end up doing my goddamn four fate route fics like I’ve joked now a truly dangerous number of times about doing [>.> me @ me] then maybe she will get a variety of lives in the end). I’m glad you wanted to know! I really like and pity her. This poor kid really did nothing wrong, much like Rin, and just got eternally tortured for asking for help and justice against the monsters who took her life so violently. Fuck Brittany. (Read: the Entity.)

Ahhhh Sally. My sweet, sweet girl. Uhhh, not sure which of the Lisa questions you meant for her too, so I’ll try to speed-answer them all? Sally’s intelligent and understanding and thoughtful, patient, polite, almost elegant despite how impoverished she spent most of her life—she just tries to act like a lady and treat people with as much respect and esteem as she can (unless they suck lol). She’s also very mentally damaged and not there though, and has extremely unstable mood swings, especially into despair. Her relationships with the other killers were limited. She talked to & was on polite terms with any who would talk to her and not be condescending or a dick so openly she’d pick up on it (so like, on cordial terms with Evan, Herman, Caleb if she’d been there that long, but not like, Kenneth or Freddy or someone who wouldn’t bother to put up an act). But mostly, after figuring out she wasn’t really of any use to them, they quit communicating with her. Sally has been extremely isolated since shortly after being taken. She believes that the survivors are innocent and suffering and knows that they don’t deserve the hunt, but has no way to stop the whole system, and has been convinced by the Entity that if she does a good job and earns moris, the ones she strangles to death get to stay dead instead of coming back after death to suffer endlessly again, so she works very dedicatedly and slowly trying to earn kills to save them. It took her physical eyes when it got her and lets her see through it’s powers, and uses that to randomize what survivors look like in her memory so she doesn’t catch wise it’s the same people over and over and she’s not saving them at all. It’s extremely tragic. God it’s one of the most cruel Entity tricks, which is saying a lot. Poor gentle woman is Sisyphus pushing a boulder up a hill day after day year after year and she doesn’t even know how hopeless and meaningless it all is. : (

When the Vigo-Philip-Alex-Benedict team was going, though, she met and attacked, then was convinced to instead befriend them, and quickly became very attached and well liked by them. Met Lisa while with the group, and became extremely fond of her and loving towards her and was truly, truly happy for a brief period of time. Still remembers her, even as lost as all her memories are. Not her name, but what she looked like to Sally, and how her hair felt, and how nice it was. Sally would have considered everyone in that group a dear friend, and in ILM, Philip most definitely becomes her deepest, closest, and best friend, just like she does to him. She’s a very faithful woman to her soul. Loved her family, loved her husband and mourned him, worked as hard as she could. Cared for her patients, and did her best in that hell until the Entity slowly whittled away at her sanity until it broke her mind and left her convinced the only way to end their pain would be to give them death, and she had to do it to save them. Sally loves little pretty things and neatness and collections. Flowers, bows and ribbons, china and colored glass. She would have treasured gifts like decorative holiday cards and carved animal figures and left them on her mantle or carefully tucked in lovingly organized and decorated books she could open to revisit the memory. Likes dresses and skirts and the way the wind feels. Hopeful and very enduring. Loving. Had a mom heart, and will never really get entirely over the loss of her children, but is strong and kind and will find new love that makes life still worth living in other people. Will remember both kindness and cruelty a long, long time. Loved Quentin from the second he gave her flowers (Dwight: Quentin, why did the entity let you have three moms? Quentin: Because I fucking earned it >:[“ [author’s note: he did. God that poor kid...]). Loved Kate from the day she sat with her in a hospital and held her hand. Is like that. Remembers small kindness and treasures them.

Sally could definitely recover. Not all the way probably, physically or mentally, but by far enough to be complete and happy and realized and who she wants. She never meant to hurt people, so she really just needs some stability, and I think she finds that with her new family. I mean, it is a lot to adjust to. It’s been like nearly 100 years. The Entiry broke her mind, and she’s got some damage that just probably can’t ever be fixed, but a lot can be, with drugs and treatments and therapy and kindness and a good support system, and honestly, the biggest things she needs are people to keep her memories together and herself present, and influences to protect her from being manipulated and controlled now that she’s so suggestible and easy to hurt, and she’s got that. I am 100% certain that while some things—the scatteredness, the ease of slipping into other moods especially deep sadness, the different way of thinking altogether—never leave her, she gets better in the most important ways and is truly happy and quite functional and what she wants to be. While there’s no way (yet anyway lol. Cybernetics that good when?) to give her new eyes since the Entity ripped hers out, and she’s blind now, and can’t be changed, her seeing eye dog does a great job for her, and she’s very happy and adjusts well. She has a lot of friends to be her eyes, and learns to lean into what she can do and has a quite fulfilling and blissful life outside the realm in ILM.

Also: thanks for the recs! I’m going on a run soon, and I’ll add those to my iPod and give ‘em a listen if I can. Hope this answered what you wanted to know! ^u^

[homebody-nobody]

these skeletons got ways of coming out

k so I actually published this a few days ago but tumblr was being a butt so I couldn’t cross-post it til now anyway This is a Pope Heyward character study that ABSOLUTELY NO ONE ASKED FOR and I wrote anyway bc I needed to fix him before I could use him as a character in the rest of this series. If you disagree with the way that I've extrapolated very little data into detailed headcanons, I don't blame you but also just like read elsewhere

title from "Brother" by Kodaline ------ ao3 ------

And that -- the intersection of John B and Kiara -- the overlay of his two best friends in his heart -- that’s what scares him.

Pope realizes some things after the Phantom goes down. Things that change the way he lives his life ------

I used to be free Of any fear of emotion But these skeletons got ways of coming out I used to believe That someday you'd see That baby you got devotion in every little motion

And I won't see the storm When the rain's coming down Never let you go Never let you go Even when the madness has broken you apart Even when the madness has broken you apart

Objectively, Pope is not an idiot. He knows this. He gets good grades, and he knows more about computers and physics and a lot of other things than the rest of any of his friends. He’s a smart kid. Even though he skipped out on his scholarship interview and his grades took a very sudden dip at the end of last semester, he has a solid GPA, a fantastic ACT score, and a glittering array of colleges waiting for his application in the fall. He’s spent his entire life waiting for his chance to get out of the Cut and prove all of those motherfuckers on Figure Eight wrong. He has potential. So why, when it comes to the simplest of things, does he feel so lost?

He was sure he was in love with Kiara. Dead certain. Everything lines up. She’s kind and beautiful and intelligent, everything that matters. He feels comfortable around her, natural, like he doesn’t have to try to be funny or charming, like he’s not constantly afraid of fucking up. Everything he’s read about being in love, all the books and the articles -- it all follows. And it’s a good story, one other people will nod their heads and smile at, high school sweethearts, best friends who found solace in each other during the most difficult part of their young lives. But there’s something about it that still feels -- wrong. Uncomfortable. Like there’s the Pope that everyone else sees and then the Pope that he is, and the one in love with Kiara isn’t the same one who lays in his bed at night and stares at the ceiling fan begging for his brain to shut up.

It’s strange, to feel so separate from himself and the life he lives. He doesn’t think it’s normal. He wishes he could talk to his friends about it. It’s not like they’re dumb, the rest of the pogues. Well, not fundamentally so, anyway. John B and JJ definitely make interesting decisions sometimes. But they all inhabit their bodies without question, so sure in their skin and the feeling that they belong with each other. He slips in and out of that too readily to feel completely comfortable at every boneyard party and through every misinformed adventure. The ease is less a standard and more a pleasant surprise; there are some nights when his friends fall quiet around a bonfire and Pope realizes he can’t stop smiling, that he loves every single one of them with his whole heart and he knows they love him, too. And then he starts doubting himself, and gets nervous and quiet and weird again, and they all brush it off as Pope being Pope -- but he’s an outsider even in their little chosen family and that starts to chafe, after a while.

Honestly, he was doing a pretty excellent job of not thinking about it until John B died. Or disappeared. Or whatever you call it when your best friend goes out in an open boat in the middle of a storm and disappears off the radio and the capsized boat is found three days later with no sign of him or his kook girlfriend. Pope’s angry at him, for that. He also really, really hates Sarah, for driving him to make that choice. For her. If it was him, he would have made John B turn around. He should have tried to stop him in the first place. He shouldn’t have helped get him to the Phantom , shouldn’t have let him go.

He hasn’t been haunted by guilt like this since JJ took the blame for sinking the wakesetter, and, for some reason, this is worse. It chews at him, a constant gnawing in the center of his chest that leaves him empty and hurting every second, swallowed by a hunger consuming itself. He hasn’t stopped thinking about John B since that deadly, neverending moment of radio static. Memories flash on a constant film reel through his head. Surfing at Rixon’s, parties at the boneyard, bonfires at the chateau, afternoons on the HMS Pogue. All the moments this summer when John B smiled and Pope followed, unquestioning.

Surfing the surge. That was so beyond stupid, and Pope knew it, even before they got to the beach and saw the huge, angry waves. But John B asked, with that insane glint in his eye that he always got when he caught hold of an idea, unable to let it go, so Pope went. Someone had to keep him alive when Kie wasn’t around. And that -- the intersection of John B and Kiara -- the overlay of his two best friends in his heart -- that’s what scares him.

The whole summer, he’d watched them, first their strange tension with an undercurrent of possibility that tugged at his stomach and made him feel sick, and then their familiar platonic intimacy as they finally became comfortable in what they were to each other. Jealousy pinched and prodded at every moment of eye contact, every kiss on his cheek or lighthearted shove of her shoulder. And the way his heart soared at the salvage yard when John B told them she’d rejected him. That had to have meant something -- and what followed logic was that Pope was into Kie, and he wished himself in John B’s place.

Right?

The night the Phantom goes down, Pope thinks he’s the one who should be dead. His parents arrive to take him home, talking to him about how worried they were, how happy they are to see him safe, but his head is still full of that gut-wrenching radio static. He doesn’t hear anything they say as he watches red and blue lights dance across their faces. They pull him into a fierce hug, JJ tugged in next to him, and all he feels is hollow.

Every step he takes echoes off the side of the tunnel of his thoughts, black and void. He stays as still as he can, spread-eagle across his bed, still dressed, just to avoid the clanging of the empty air when he moves. The barest stimulation is too much, the dimmest light blinding. His chest feels like someone has reached in and turned his ribs inside out, split them with a chest-cracker and opened him up on a steel table. In the far, unexplored regions of his imagination, he can see his own autopsy, surgery performed on a perfectly silent boy, hands at his sides, eyes still open, heart still beating.

Night falls around him, from grey dusk to the unforgiving ink-black you can only get in power outages on a tiny island fighting to breathe through the salt marsh. The only thing that drives him from his bed is the urgent cry of his bladder, and it’s easier to get dressed for bed once he’s already moving across the floor. The floorboards creak under his feet and while he would normally walk lightly for fear of being hassled for waking the house the next morning, his steps are heavy and dragging. Staring at the counter, he reaches for his toothbrush and squeezes toothpaste out onto the worn bristles. He puts it in his mouth and looks up, making eye contact reflection for the first time.

You love him.  

The realization hits him as clearly as if someone had whispered directly in his ear. It’s like an icepick through the center of his exposed, defenseless heart. He lowers the toothbrush slowly, the silence of the house ringing in his ears like sirens. His breath quickens, his bare chest rising and falling as he backs away from the counter, fear and grief and disappointment and a thousand other things he can’t name swirling in him like the storm that ended life the way he knew it. The tears start, flowing down his face silently at first and then, as he loses all control of his breath and his hands find their way into his hair, accompanied by gut-wrenching, heartbreaking sobs, broken sounds of grief and loss in too many respects.

Heyward rushes down the hall, throwing the door open, fear for his son wild in his eyes. He finds Pope doubled over, hyperventilating, face a mess of snot and tears, eyes squeezed closed, as he shakes and sobs. After a moment in the door, he pushes in, pulling Pope into his chest, wrapping firm, solid arms built from hard work and weather-beaten skin around him. “It’s gonna be alright, kid,” he whispers as Pope shivers violently against him. “It’s gonna be alright.”

Pope doesn’t remember being folded into his bed, or how the glass of water and bottle of Advil ended up on his bedside table. He wakes up well into the afternoon, the room heavy and sticky with the day’s heat, the air conditioning rendered useless with the lack of electricity. The golden light fools him into a pleasant kind of ignorance for half a moment before the reality of the previous night crashes over him ,and suddenly the comfy nest of his bed feels like a prison, sucking him down like quicksand into the mattress. He puts his hands over his face, pressing fingertips into aching eyes, trying to keep himself calm by counting backwards from four hundred, a number with each breath. When he reaches three hundred and fifty four he feels like he might be able to move again, and he reaches for the water and gulps it down, a note stuck to the bottom fluttering to the floor.

He swings his legs out of bed to pick it up, recognizing his mother’s handwriting on the pink post-it note, smudged and running from the condensation. Breakfast in the fridge , it says, don’t worry about the store. Rest. We love you. It makes his skin itch, rather than being comforting. The storm in his head turns a tide toward guilt, like he’s keeping a secret that he just learned, himself. The bed calls, but he knows that if he collapses back into it he won’t move for the rest of the day, and that he should stand before he changes his mind. The ache in his belly forces him up, and he pads through the empty house, feeling halfway like a ghost. Eggs with peppers and cheese, sausage, and hashbrowns are on a covered plate in the fridge, and he unwraps it and puts it in the microwave, watching the food rotate as his mind comes to grips with consciousness.

He’s in love with John B. The boy that taught him how to play beer pong and smoke a bowl, the surfer that pushes him while they’re out on the water, daring him to bigger and bigger tricks, making him better. The idiot that chases gold and kook girls without a glance at impossibility, simply because he has no understanding of the idea. The John B that died last night.

The microwave beeps and he takes his food to the counter, hunched over it, twisting a fork between his fingers and feeling like his stomach might feel better on the outside of him. He takes a few bites, to see if maybe just the potatoes might go down easy, but they taste like ash, and he sits back from the plate, sore and exhausted. He wanders through the house and eventually back up to his room, standing in front of his closet, knowing he should get dressed but overwhelmed by even the simplest choice. Finally, he just pulls on a plain t-shirt over his basketball shorts, and, after catching a glimpse of his hair, puts a snapback on backwards. He doesn’t feel like sitting, so he doesn’t, tucking his keys in his pocket and sliding on a pair of flip flops, leaving the house without his phone or any sort of destination, just walking as his thoughts churn and crash over each other without being much of anything at all.

The heat sends sweat rolling down his temples and between his shoulder blades but he barely feels it, keeping his eyes on his feet as he shuffles down the side of the road. Normally, he’d be listening for any sound that might indicate Rafe or Topper coming up behind him, constantly judging the proximity of the cars, quietly bemoaning the blister forming under his left big toe from the strap of his sandal. But the only thing he senses is the slap of his shoes against the asphalt, carrying him aimlessly across the island.

His own denial fights vocally to be heard under the stifling realization, but it’s something he’s been pushing down for years, ignoring even as the obvious signs wiggled their way into his every day life, like the goosebumps at John B’s touch or the expansion of his chest when John B laughed. It was always there, waiting for him to see it, quietly growing and climbing its way like ivy from his heart to his head, finally bursting from underneath his skin at the worst possible moment.

He’s going to have to tell his dad. There won’t be any way to explain the grief crashing over him without the truth. That settles itself on his shoulders right next to the realization itself and everything else he’s been holding up for months. Knowing the name of it, at least, makes it easier to handle. He’s been carrying around his feelings for John B without knowing what they were, mis-assigning them to Kiara and fucking up what’s probably his favorite friendship. He’s gonna have to tell her, too. He’s not looking forward to that.

As he walks, it settles in, making a home along with all the other true things about him. Pope Heyward. Black. Sixteen years of age. Six feet tall. Pogue. And, he guesses, gay. Maybe bi. But probably gay. Looking back, no girl has ever made him feel the way that John B makes -- he swallows. Used to make him feel. With his stupid floppy hair and his kind brown eyes and that absurd jawline. Tears cloud his eyes and the path in front of him blurs. His best friend is dead . And it took that horrible, heart-shattering tragedy for him to figure out how he felt about him.

He keeps walking for a while, choking back tears and half-planning conversations with his parents and Kie, listening to the slap of his sandals on the cracked asphalt littered with long, dry pine needles and cracked seed pods, signalling the nearing end of summer. He feels, gratefully, a little more clear-headed, less freaked out than he thought he would be. He always feels better, having a plan, no matter how vague and ineffectual that plan may turn out to be.

After a while, he looks up, and finds himself in Figure Eight -- a very dangerous place to be, given the current social climate of the island -- not very far from Kie’s house. He heaves a sigh. Better now than later. Pausing before mounting the porch, Pope spares a second of a regret for his appearance. Kiara’s parents have never been keen on him or either of the other boys, and he knows that showing up in tattered shorts and flip flops won’t exactly help his case. Anna opens the door, looking surprised to see him, and Pope is momentarily relieved it isn’t Kie’s father.

“Good morning,” she says, wary.

“Hi,” Pope replies, lacking his usual magical parent-charming abilities, exhaustion and grief sapping the energy from his bones. There’s an awkward pause as Mrs. Carrera awaits the explanation of a rattily dressed pogue boy on her porch and Pope scrambles for one. He settles on the obvious. “Is Kie here?” He doesn’t know where else she’d be, honestly, but it’s the usual go-to for when they’re dragging Kie back to the Cut for nonsense and potential delinquency, and he’s hoping her mom won’t question it.

“She’s not,” Anna says, concern coloring her tone. “She isn’t with you?” Pope feels his eyebrows draw together, a betrayal of his own confusion, an immediate admittance of guilt.

“I, uh --” he says eloquently as panic overtakes Anna’s face. “I mean, she --” He’s saved by the girl herself riding down the sidewalk on a bike that looks like it’s seen better days, rattling loudly as she cruises toward the house. “There she is!” he says, with a disturbing amount of forced enthusiasm that puts the same expression on Kie and Anna’s faces. “So, we’re all good. Thanks, Mrs. C!”

But Anna isn’t gonna let her daughter slide so easily. “Kiara,” she says, “You weren’t in your room this morning.”

“I went for a bike ride,” Kie replies coldly. “I needed to think.”

“For three hours?” Anna asks, crossing her arms over her chest.

Kie shrugs. “I needed to think a lot.” Anna looks like she wants a little more information out of her daughter, but she looks at Pope, clearly reluctant to start a fight with him around. He feels caught, standing on the porch between mother and daughter, like he’s in a room with a half-constructed bomb. Kie’s hands fidget with the handlebars. “C’mon, Pope,” she says.

“No way,” Anna interjects. Kie opens her mouth like she wants to argue, but her mother’s words cut her off. “You two can hang out on the porch for a while, but when you’re done,” and here, she looks at Kiara like she might actually commit murder if her daughter doesn’t listen to her, “Come inside. We have a lot to talk about.”

Kie heaves a heavy breath. “Fine,” she says. Satisfied, Anna turns and goes inside. Pope drops off the porch and walks with Kie as she walks the bike over to the garage.

“Hey,” he says, his heart in his throat. This is a complete turnaround from the emptiness of earlier, every inch of him hyper aware of her body language, the changes in her expression and her attitude towards him. His entire life feels like a shipwreck, dashed against the rocks after careful years of building, after months of planning the perfect voyage. “Bike ride?” he asks, because he always knows when she’s lying.

She props her bike up against the side of the garage. “I was with JJ,” she blows out on a sigh. She doesn’t look at him as they walk around to the back porch. “At the Chateau.” Pulling her hair out of it’s ponytail, she splits it over her shoulders, fidgeting nervously with the ends. “I didn’t want him to be alone.”

He’s about to say that he was alone, that maybe he wanted to have his friends around him, too, but then he remembers his father catching him in the bathroom, waking up in his own bed, water and a note on the bedside table. JJ wouldn’t have gotten any of that. He can’t even go home, not after Luke Maybank finds out what happened to his precious Phantom . With John B -- gone -- JJ doesn’t have anyone left. Except for them. And Pope was too wrapped up in his own grief and bullshit to think about something like that. He takes a second to be grateful for Kiara.

They reach the steps to the Carrera’s back porch, and she sits down on the second-to-last one. “I have something to tell you,” she says, and she still won’t look at him. Half of him wonders what she’s upset about while the other hopes she can’t hear his heartbeat, it’s pounding so loud in his own ears.

Slowly, he sinks down next to her, the morning sun radiant across her skin, amplified by the reflection off the channel. He takes a deep breath. “I have something to tell you, too.” Her eyebrows draw together. He licks his lips. She pulls her knees up to her chest. He stares at his feet. They’re afraid of each other, and the awkward tension in the air makes him hate every wrong thing he said, every lie he told her, even though he believed them when he said it. She doesn’t say anything else, and he takes that as his cue to go first. He looks up, before he says anything, taking in her kind brown eyes, the soft lines of her kind, intelligent face. He wants one last picture of her before he changes everything. “I don’t love you,” he says.

Her face contorts in an expression of surprise and offense, and he rapidly backpedals. “I mean, I do.” he says. “Of course I do, but like, like a sister.”

“A sister,” she says incredulously, confusion rising in her eyes.

“Not -- Oh, fuck, that’s not --” He drops his head in his hands, his blood rushing so loudly in his ears he can’t hear himself think. “This is not going well.”

“No shit,” she says, but there’s a little bit of relief in her voice. This bumbling, tripping-over-his-words Pope makes a lot more sense than the one that lost his shit and nearly killed Rafe Cameron the previous day. (And God, was that only yesterday?) He digs the heels of his palms into his eyes, and she notices his breath start to quicken. “Pope?” she asks, leaning forward and putting a hand on his shoulder.

“Kie, I’m gay.” It falls out of his mouth like a boulder, hitting the ground and shaking the earth with its weight. It’s the first time he’s said it out loud, and it’s terrifying, to have it so concrete in front of him, no longer nebulous and trapped in his head. He can’t take it back, can’t lie about it anymore, to her or himself or anyone else. He has to live with that truth, now, no matter how he feels about it. Part of that, while intimidating, makes him feel just a little bit more free.

“Oh,” she says, and he’s too panicked to discern anything in her tone. “Okay.” He doesn’t want to look at her, doesn’t want to see the horror or anger or whatever else must be settling there.

He rushes to explain himself, like he didn’t hear. “I’m sorry that I thought I was in love with you,” he says, even as she feels a thousand worries slip from her shoulders like coming up from diving under a wave. “I just, I was jealous, and I thought that it was John B I was jealous of, but it wasn’t, it was you, and then he--” Pope blows by his name before he chokes on it, realizing what he’s said aloud, how dangerous and loaded a once-familiar thing has become. “It wasn’t him I was jealous of,” he repeats, lacing his fingers over the back of his head, dropping it to his chest. “It wasn’t him.” He squeezes his eyes shut, swallowing down the tears fighting their way up his throat.

Kie hesitates in reaching for him, but the moment her fingertips brush his shoulder, she falls against her best friend, wrapping her arms around him as best she can. “Oh, Pope,” she whispers, as tears well in her own eyes. “Oh Pope, I’m so sorry.” He falls into her embrace, all his anger and uncertainty dissipating like fog at dawn. They both cry for a while, her silently, him shaking. She does her best to comfort him, but his grief has taken on a different tone she can no longer imagine.

When his breath finally slows, he sits up out of her arms, wiping under his eyes. “You aren’t mad?” He asks, in true Pope fashion.

“Why would I be mad?” she asks, disbelief echoing in her words.

“Well, I was…” he sniffs, watching his hands fold over each other. “I was kind of a jerk about it.” He feels bad, about the way everything went down. He was drowning, in disappointment and confusion and a million other things he still doesn’t have words for that he wishes he could explain. He was an asshole to her when he should have listened and  

She knocks their shoulders together with half a sly smile. “Yeah, you kind of were.” It feels good to be joking with him like this again, after the last couple of days of chaos and anger and disappointment after disappointment. They’re best friends for a reason, her boys and her.

“And then --” he swallows, remembering the moments at the Dump after John B disappeared into the marsh, moments he still doesn’t understand. “Y-you kissed me, and --”

The smile falls off her face. “I shouldn’t have done that,” she says. She shifts her weight between her feet, her knees moving back and forth as they sit side by side on the porch steps, picking at her nails. “That wasn’t --” she looks at him, and he looks back. “I shouldn’t have done that.” She stretches her legs out in front of her, knocking her sneakers together, her hands dropping to her lap. “I have my own shit to figure out, Pope,” she says. “I shouldn’t have dragged you into it.”

Pope leans over, “You wanna talk about it?” he asks pointedly. He knows she likes to talk things through, make sense of them by pushing everything out into the atmosphere so she can see it all, pick out the pieces that make sense. He also doesn’t want to talk about him, anymore.

“No,” she says abruptly. He leans back into his own space, holding his hands up a little, and she bites her lip, like she does when she’s thinking too hard about what to say next. “I’m sorry,” she admits. “I just --” she knocks her feet together again before pulling them back up to the last step, her chin falling onto her knees. “I gotta think about it some more, I guess.” She looks at him, screwing up her face in that way that makes everyone agree that she’s adorable. “I’ve got some more I’ve gotta work out.”

“You know you can still talk to me, right?” he reassures her. He used to be the best listener, before he went and fucked everything up. Kie would talk to him about things John B and JJ would never understand, usually about parents or family pressure, things she felt guilty discussing with either one of their practically-orphaned friends. Pope understood, and it was easy to let Kie just let everything out, answering her own questions, defining problems and putting together solutions in the same breath. It’s part of the reason he assumed they would end up together, before -- well. Before. She trusted him, and he fucked that up, and now he can only hope that he can earn it back.

“I know,” she says, folding her arms on top of her knees and looking back out across the channel. “It’s not because of --” she stops, unsure of how to define it.

“Yeah,” he answers. He doesn’t want to talk about it either.

“It’s just --” she goes quiet for a second, picking through words like the wrong ones are rotten, and he watches her, the slight breeze off the water picking up strands of her hair. Her shoulder drops as she moves her head, and a few curls shift enough that he can see dark red marks tracking up the side of her neck. Hickies? “I don’t think I have words for it yet,” she says, finishing her sentence. JJ , he thinks, her confession about her absence this morning circling back through his mind. The word is JJ .

Pope isn’t blind. He sees the way JJ looks at her. He always has. It never unsettled him like the shared glances between Kie and John B, and now he knows why. It’s a little relieving, to not have to manufacture false jealousy in the pit of his stomach, to have to lie to himself in order to make his constructed, false worldview make sense. JJ and Kie -- they’re going to be something else to handle, with the inherent chaos of how they both handle their emotions and the forced bravado they both put on, but he supposes they were… inevitable, in a way. Kiara was misinterpreting her own feelings, just like he was, forcing herself to believe she loved someone who made more sense, someone that was easier to accept than confronting the truth. John B was his truth -- JJ is hers. He’s grateful, in a way, that they’ll have each other, through this -- once she gains the same clarity he’s come to.

“It’s okay,” he says, as everything slides into place. He’s not gonna rush this, not gonna make her take steps she’s not ready for. “You don’t have to talk about it if you’re not ready.” She smiles at him -- a weak thing, but genuine.

“Thanks, Pope,” she says.

He shrugs. “What are best friends for?” She drops her head against his shoulder, and for the first time since Shoupe confirmed their worst fears, he feels like things might, someday, be okay again.

They stay like that for a while, and then she asks him if he wants to talk more about it, and Pope recounts the moment of clarity in the bathroom, his thought process on his walk across the island. Kie listens, because he’s still her best friend, and it’s one of his favorite things about her, the way she makes it so easy to let everything out, the way she makes him feel seen. She doesn’t say much, but she doesn’t have to, because everything is still so fresh and bleeding that he doesn’t know what he wants to hear, yet. She reassures him she still loves him, that she’ll stick with him no matter what, just like she’s always promised to do, and that seems to do the trick.

Eventually, Mrs. Carrera comes out and offers to drive Pope home, a very pointed instruction to the both of them. She goes to get the car, leaving the two of them to say goodbye on the porch. Kie stands with her arms crossed over her stomach, like she’s holding herself together. “My parents are probably gonna have me on lockdown for a while,” she says, biting on the corner of her lip.  

“Mine too,” he answers, with some inkling of what she’s about to ask him.

“Do you think you could --” she starts, and she’s staring somewhere around his collarbones, because JJ means more to her now, and makes this request, somehow, different. “I mean, with service down, it’s gonna be hard to keep in touch and I just --” She sighs, frustrated with herself, that she can’t get the words out. “When his dad figures out what happened --”

Pope interrupts her this time, reaches a gentle hand out for her arm. “I’ll keep an eye on him,” he promises. “I’ll talk to my parents…” he says, automatically, his usual main resource for help or assistance, and pauses, remembering the note he left on with his father, how things might go without the overhang of a recent disaster. His parents. They’ll be out all day, at least, won’t know about his sojourn to Figure Eight. But they’ll be back, and he has a lot to face.

“Will you just make sure he’s safe?” she asks, small and scared, and, in true Kiara fashion, ashamed to be asking for help.

“Yeah,” he answers. He wraps her in a tight hug, grateful to have his friend back, to be centering somewhere at least slightly left of normal, to be spiralling down from the insane high of failure and the chaos of being half a fugitive. “Yeah, of course.”

Mrs. Carrera drives him home, and even though she tries to ask him how he’s holding up, he answers monosyllabically, avoiding small talk by staring out the window and doing his best to stave off the encroaching panic as he anticipates the upcoming conversation with his father. Anna watches him carefully, and he can feel her eyes on him. It makes him uneasy.

Watching Figure Eight slowly melt into subdivisions and condominiums and then, as houses get smaller and the weeds get wilder, into the Cut. In a matter of minutes, fantastic wealth descends into abject struggle and poverty, a jarring display of privilege and elitism that Pope and the others are no longer shocked by. They grew up in it, cut down over and over again by a system that simply wasn’t built for them, grew up before their time because the kooks never will, abdicating responsibility and ignoring the fallout. Pope’s thoughts wander to Topper’s wakesetter, bile rising in his throat. His impulsive mistake ruined JJ’s life at sixteen, and the Thorntons, well. They’ll just buy another boat.

When they reach the Heywards’, Anna cuts the engine, and Pope doesn’t move, staring at his family’s little house, shabby but well-kept, his mother’s vegetable garden in full swing, bursting with a physical manifestation of love and care in an explosion of green leaves and colorful fruits and vegetables. He thinks about the Carrera’s neatly kept lawn, the decorative plants placed carefully on their wraparound porch, the contrast between the two images. Chaos and love, wealth and precision.

“I love your mother’s garden,” Anna says, almost like she doesn’t mean to. “I wish she’d tell me her secret.”

You can’t have it , Pope thinks, selfishly. He wants this one thing, for his mother, for his family. Instead, he answers; “I wouldn’t know.” This, he realizes, is unfortunately true. When was the last time he helped his mother with her garden? Asked her what she wanted to do on a Saturday? He helps with the store, of course, but in that, he doesn’t have a choice. He’s spent so much time chasing John B, first his promise of adventure, and then his approval, and then, desperate to help him in his hour of need. When was the last time he helped with the yard work? Helped make dinner? Stayed in on a Friday night?

His parents love him violently, work hard to give him opportunities they never had. His father breaks his back, works the store, the delivery service, any hard labor job he can get, used to being a tool, something to be taken advantage of, a means to an end. He does it so Pope can go to school, have a laptop to do homework and apply for colleges on, have a phone to text his friends and stay in contact with his parents. His throat thickens with the realization that his father was right -- he has been ungrateful. He’s been disrespectful, and rude, and if it was him, he wouldn’t even let himself back into the house, much less comfort him, leave him breakfast and reassuring notes.

Anna takes the emotion in his eyes for something else, and she puts a hand on his shoulder that feels so distinctly different from Kiara’s that it’s fundamentally wrong, and he freezes under her touch. “I know this is hard,” she says, in a tone that tries for concerned mom and lands somewhere closer to patronizing school counselor. “But you’ll get through it. You have each other, and that’s the most important part.”

“Thanks,” he says coldly, reaching for the door handle before climbing quickly out of the car. When his feet hit the packed-dirt drive, he stops, feeling like an asshole. “And thank you. For the ride.” He goes to shut the door, but she interrupts him.

“Pope,” she says, and he looks up at her, making eye contact for the first time since he got in the car. “If you -- or your family -- needs anything…” She bites her lip the same way Kie does. “Just, don’t hesitate to ask.” Pope usually rankles under the suggestion of charity, pride bred into him alongside a stubborn willfulness that rivals even his father’s, but she knows life in the Cut, has faced the same things he and his family deal with every day. It’s an odd juxtaposition, her inherent compassion and her dislike of her daughter’s friends. It’s what, at the end of the day, separates her eternally from Kie.

“Yeah,” he answers. “Of course. Thanks, Ms. Anna.”

When he reaches the door, he hears tires twist in the dirt, and Anna Carrera drives away, back to her house, her daughter, her life on Figure Eight. Pope lets himself in, showers off the sweat from his trek to Kie’s, and sets about cleaning the house, both as a distraction and a desperate appeal for his parents’ forgiveness. The whole afternoon, he rehearses a million different versions of the same speech, apologies and admittances, going back and forth about copping to the sinking of Topper’s boat, afraid of his father’s wrath and the legal consequences, but still guilty and anxious to the point of nausea over it, desperate to do the right thing.

Pope was raised with a strong sense of right and wrong, a deep and little-discussed Catholic faith, and a strong sense of familial pride. What Heywards are and aren’t, what they do and don’t do -- it was all drilled into him from a young age. Heywards pay their debts. Heywards don’t complain, don’t argue, don’t talk back. Heywards work hard. Heywards work honest.

Heywards aren’t gay.

It was never said, but Pope knows his dad. He knows what counts as acceptable behavior, the future his father imagines for him. A college degree, a Good Job, a house, a wife, kids -- he knows what’s expected. He tries to wrestle with the disappointment that he’ll never own up to that image as he scrubs the stove, tears welling up as he works at a particularly stubborn grease stain. He’s already disappointed them so much, just in the past few days. What will they say? What will they think of him?

He knows he’s lucky, as a kid in the Cut with both parents still around, still willing to work, still willing to love him. There are too many kids like John B and JJ, left behind, ignored and neglected, the victims of vicious cycles and cruel tragedies. Pope still has a whole family, as small and broken as it may be. He should start acting like it.

He’s just finished dusting the living room when he hears tires in the driveway, the rattling engine of his father’s old pickup, and he freezes like a prey animal caught in an open plain. They’re home. His mother makes quiet comments on the improved state of the house as they toss keys in bowls and remove shoes, speaking calmly to each other, the soft noises of domesticity and routine. Routine he is about to monumentally disrupt, more than he ever has.

Pope has a speech planned. He has things he wants to say, sentences he needs them to hear in the same way he has them planned. Everything needs to follow the course he’s laid out, or it could be open to misinterpretation. He’s prepared. That’s what he does -- he plans, he structures, he researches and prepares. All of that disintegrates the moment his father walks into the living room.

“Pope,” he says. “You cleaned.”

“Dad, I’m sorry,” Pope says, and the words choke him, tears welling and spilling in the same instant, like a faucet turning on after winter. He tells him everything, about Topper’s wakesetter and the failed treasure hunt and the impossible hope that drew him from his scholarship interview, the desperation and the certainty that he was following, determined to be the final piece of the puzzle, the thing that saved his friends. He begs for forgiveness, crying and broken, looking for himself in his fathers eyes. Heyward doesn’t say anything for a long time, soaking in the information. His wife is struck dumb, at Pope’s heart breaks with the horror in his mother’s eyes, at his admittances of all he’s done.

“Please,” Pope begs. “Say something.”

The silence that hangs in the living room feels like a gun against his temple, his father’s finger on the trigger. “Well son,” Heyward says, “What are you gonna do about it?”

“What --” Pope’s brain stops, too overwhelmed to process this reaction from his father. There is grief and anger, guilt and fear, and a thousand other things he cannot name. He is out of words, out of ideas and out of power. He wants someone to tell him what to do, because cannot possibly summon the energy to determine a path himself.

“You sunk that boy’s boat?” Pope nods, dumbfounded, answering on instinct. Heyward looks tired. “You let your friend take the fall?”

“I --” It’s hard, to hear it in his father’s voice, to hear the disappointment there, to feel it, real, metallic, and cutting in the air. “Yeah.”

Heyward shrugs, like it’s simple. “What are you gonna do about it?” Maybe it is. Pope got himself into this mess, and now he needs to get himself out.

“I don’t --” he starts, with nowhere to go.

“You gonna do the right thing?” His father asks, his tone implying that there is one answer.

Pope straightens up, closes his mouth, swallows down all the tears, all the uncertainty and vulnerability. He has asked for guidance, and his father is providing it. There is no more room for weakness here. “Yes, sir.”

Heyward nods, and turns to Yvonne, who has tears in her eyes. “He’ll be fine, sweetheart,” He says to his wife. “We’ve got a good boy here. He’ll be fine.” He wraps his arms around her, folding her into his chest in a familiar, nostalgic gesture. Pope feels awkward, watching his parents comfort each other, but he knows that his feelings are not the most important in the room. His chest hurts knowing he’s the one who caused their pain.

But this conversation still isn’t over. “Dad, um,” he says, and Heyward looks at him with exhaustion in his wizened eyes. “there’s one more thing.”

Heyward turns toward him again, leaving one arm around his wife. “Well I don’t know if you can shock me anymore today, Pope,” he says, “so go ahead.”

The words dam up behind his lips, and his hands flex at his sides, clenching into fists and spreading out again, and there’s no way out of this, not anymore. It was easier with Kie, for some reason.  “Dad, I’m gay.” It hangs there, bigger and somehow more terrifying than anything he’s said since his parents came home. The air in the living room doesn’t move, stale and muggy in the North Carolina evening, without the hum of the fridge or the air conditioner for reprieve.

Heyward blinks. Once, twice. Yvonne shakes on a silent sob, a noise that cracks Pope’s ribs open. “Okay,” his father replies.

It is somehow relieving and disappointing all at once. Pope doesn’t lie to his parents, at least, as much as he can help it. “Is that all?” he asks, because he expected -- something more? Something beyond indifference. Maybe rage, maybe affirmation. Maybe some indicator that this was just as big of a deal as he made it out to be.

“What else do you want me to say?” Heyward asks, knowing this is the most he and his son have talked about anything in years. The last mention at vulnerability came before the ill-fated scholarship interview, less than a minute of conversation before Heyward left his son to take a job. Sometimes he kicks himself for that, wondering about what might have happened if he’d waited, been there when his son made one of the most impulsive decisions of his young life. Could he have caught him coming out the door? Talked him down? What would today be, if Heyward had been there?

Pope looks at his father through a haze of tears, his breath somewhere other than his chest, uncontrollable and foreign. “You don’t hate me?”

Heyward shrugs. “You’re still my son, ain’t you?” Pope nods, sniffling and backhanding tears off of his face. “Well then, I guess I still love you.” Pope doesn’t remember the last time his father said that to him. “Pope,” Heyward sighs, heaving himself off the couch. “You’ve done a lot these past few weeks I don’t understand. I’m not gonna pretend I’m not upset with you.” Pope looks at his father’s feet, weary and sore on the threadbare carpet. “But you bein gay? That ain’t why.”

And that, that breaks the tenuous control he has over his emotions, and he sobs, loud and hard and echoing in the small living room. “I thought maybe -- maybe you might --” Pope tries, his arms at his sides, fists clenched, chest shaking. Heyward steps forward, wrapping his arms around his son, because he may not know what Pope is going to do, what he’s going to do as a father, as a man. Even though neither of them know how they’re going to get through this, how they’re going to deal with the police department, the Thorntons, John B’s death, and the rest -- they  know this, they know the faith they have in each other, the love and respect that lives there, even after everything.

Pope’s father pulls back from the embrace, places his hands on his son’s shoulders and levels him with the same stare that Pope has known his whole life. “What are you?” he asks, the same way he’s asked a million times before. This is a routine, between father and son, in moments of desperation, a way of taking a step back up from the most crushing of lows, of taking back control, setting their shoulders and facing into the wind.

Pope knows the answer. “I’m a Heyward.”

[firebirdsdaughter]

Okay, so…

… Options.

Will I forever feel like Horobi was jipped character development and a character arc that was owed to him? Hell yes. Will I always disagree w/ certain choices made? Also hell yes.

But there are things they can do that they are maybe doing that could make this work to the degree that it can work. Horobi reaching the conclusion that humans are the root of the problem and therefore HumaGear (and esp Jin, I would love love love if they lean into the family angle on this, the tragedy of a parent willing to do anything for their child to the extreme is a pain I like), bc even if there are a few generally okay humans, their collective malice (bc it’s not like the data the Ark was incorrect) will always lead to something like the Ark, and the Ark is also a threat to HumaGear (and Jin, and specifically caused Horobi to hurt Jin), makes sense, given his experiences, the way his mind works, esp w/ being an AI, and, again, his position as a father (come on guys, lean into the family angle, you know it’ll hurt more!). So him resolving that humans still have to go to make the world safe for his son and for HumaGear at large is in character.

What I’m anxious about as far as that goes is mainly them leaning on the ‘humans are the source of all good’ thing a little to hard and treating Horobi like he’s supposed to be some sort of evil strawman when he… Has a point. Part of this is why I really hope it’s Ark One who blows up Izu or whatever in the upcoming ep bc I feel like ‘Horobi kills Izu’ would just be more fuel on that fire (esp after he very obviously established a position against harming another HumaGear, even the ones still serving humans, in this ep when the Ark pushed him too far). It goes too far to paint him as some ‘awful villain’ esp when the Ark is… Standing right there and has no qualms about killing HumaGear who interfere w/ its interests. So basically, my main fear is Horobi getting reduced to a ‘mere evil villain’ rather than a tragedy of awful circumstances beyond his control that drove him to this point. If that makes sense. The latter is really poetic and tragic and honestly, suits him and his… ‘Style,’ really, while the other is just… Shallow. So I’m hoping they lean on the whole ‘noble goals’/‘the tragedy of a parent who will do anything for their child’ angle rather than ‘he’s bad bc he doesn’t like humans’ or whatever, if that makes sense.

And, honestly, I am prepared for him to die over this. My one conditions are that Jin… Actually reacts (my biggest gripe w/ Graphite’s death was how little reaction it got even when it happened). Like, Horobi dying for this, esp if they lean into the him doing this for HumaGear/Jin thing… I want Jin to actually mourn him. Like. I want him to recognise the tragedy and situations that lead to this, and grieve over the fact that if things had gone differently, Horobi might have been able to make it work (esp if my theory comes true!). I want that to be a lesson he takes w/ him, I want it to be shown Horobi mattered to him. I want him to grieve his father, and be angry about the scenarios that lead to his death. In the preview, he sounds upset that the Ark might kill Horobi (notably playing right after apparently being ordered to kill Horobi himself). I will go wild if it goes something like Horobi protects Jin from Ark One and then dies in his arms and Jin is enraged at the Ark and ultimately resolves to find a way to make a better world for HumaGear and fulfil Horobi’s true ultimate dream of living free. Jin caring. That’s all I’m asking at this point. I would fucking die if they let Fuwa react, but I’ve accepted that suffering. Face still hurts from having a door slammed in it, but as you do. But they feel like they’re building it up far too much for just one deadpan line and then never mentioning it again (then again, I had similar thoughts about Graphite…).

Basically… The poetic, self-sacrifice, noble goals, almost… Kinda samurai ending works for Horobi. But only if they really treat it as such. Additionally… I really want it to impact Jin. I’d love for the personal, core aspect to be that Horobi wants a better world for his son, though he might struggle w/ that personal desire bc he’s been brainwashed out of wanting things for himself for so long, he might see that specific feeling as selfish. It feels like a last words thing, where he dies in Jin’s arms confessing that in the end, what he wanted was a world where Jin could live freely, no matter the cost (again, the tragedy of a parent willing to do anything to secure what they have come to believe is best for their child). For extra angst, maybe him having a last moment where he confesses that, despite that, he also wanted to be part of that world. Starts out just being like ‘I wanted a world where you could smile freely,’ but comes to realise too late that he actually wanted to be part of that world. Wanted to see Jin’s smile (oh my gods, Horobi doing the Snape ‘look at me’ thing only it’s him asking to see Jin smile one more time… TT^TT).

And that’s not even touching on the possibility of leaving it open for resurrecting him. I mean, obviously, there’s fic, but there’s still the chance of the show leaving it open—or, Takahashi does have precedent for last minute rises from the dead.

If… Any of that made any sense?

[bradfordarchive]

clicks my fingers to no humanly discernible rhythm as i strut bk onto the dash w chara number two!! (it’s me nai bk again bt this time wearing a stick on moustache). bradley’s pinterest is HERE n u kno the drill mre abt her under the cut n like this fr those Sweet Sweet plots!!

MARGARET QUALLEY / CIS-FEMALE — don’t look now, but is that bradley milligan i see? the 23 year old psychology student is in their junior year and she is a rochester alum. i hear they can be brave, resilient, destructive and ruthless, so maybe keep that in mind. i bet she will make a name for themselves living in off campus. ( nai. 23. gmt. she/her. )

aesthetics: singeing a hole in your fishnets with the cherry of a menthol, spitting a pistachio behind the bar just to hear it ping off the nozzle top bottles, lemon in a fresh cut, a war torn poppy standing alone in an empty field, poking bruises, stomping over flowerbeds when there’s a path right next to it, dangling over ledges just to feel your chest jolt, a snarling rottweiler that should be muzzled, limp feet poking out behind a door, ‘I PROMISE I DON’T BITE’ scrawled on a name tag, slapping a bald head in front of you at the cinema like it’s a bongo, not owning a single jacket that isn’t stolen, driving a stolen car in the wrong lane against the traffic, blowing coke in someone’s face after asking “hey, does this smell funny to you?”, hair more feral than a wolf cub and eyes smudgier than a coal mine.  

BACKGROUND:

father runs a gang n strip club in queens called ‘no angels’ tht fronts an affluent drug trade, primarily coke. his name is tony milligan n his gang is p infamous around there fr being jst like…. completely cutthroat n awful. they were nicknamed ‘tony’s rottweilers’ by locals bc he bsically has all of these trained dogs on leash at his command n they’re still a growing organisation tday

he’s pretty much the worst human being alive n bradley hs like….. a lot of issues with herself as a result of years of toxicity n abuse

in terms of more family bkground info her mum’s name was alyssa n she vanished when bradley was 12. jst like…. into thin air. nothing. no note. zilch. gan! n when bradley asked her dad abt it his response was essentially “guess she didn’t love us enough to stay”. as bradley’s got older tho n become (without intention) more involved in the business side of things, it’s become pretty clear there was far more to the story.

they had a horrible marriage n tony ws quite violent at the best of times, which didn’t help the fact tht alyssa ws struggling a lot w severe depression n rly just… not in the mindset to b dealing w anything else on top of tht, even where motherhood ws concerned. bradley p much… would look after her a lot n they’d both b scared of her dad n it was just a whole mess.

anyway im rambling bt basically tony (bradley’s dad) gt wind of alyssa sleeping w men tht worked fr him n he just… got rid. bradley’s kind of worked out over the yrs tht her mum didn’t jst leave on her own accord n tht something must hav happened to her bt she’s too scared of her dad to ever directly accuse him

when her mum went all of her dad’s cruelty pretty mch got channelled straight onto her. it ws diluted between two before bt as u can probably imagine her upbringing was jst…. a steep downhill decline frm tht point onwards

she learnt ways 2 deal w the incurring trauma bt they weren’t healthy ones at all! bsically jst. will do or take anything fr the distraction. chases a thrill like it’s the only way to remind her she’s alive. has absolutely no regard fr her own wellbeing n sometimes gets other ppl in trouble too bc she’s so insatiably reckless

she hd….2 separate stints of psychiatric hospitalisation n she never tlks abt it. like ever. acknowledging she’s been vulnerable is her worst nightmare n bc of the way her dad raised her she always thinks any sign of struggling within herself is weakness. truly does…. not kno how to properly emotion

CUT TO!!!! huntington beach. she’s currently living in a spacious loft above a rly busy bar tht i picture like. p close to campus so a lot of students prob frequent it?? she loves it bc she can sit on the window sill smoking n argue w ppl tht walk past drunk. jst randomly callin out like. nice chest hair Loser. i feel like she hasn’t even paid fr wifi she jst uses the bar’s free one n like. goes in there expecting free drinks all the time?? is jst like erm? i live here? let me drink? this is my house? aka she’s. a lot.

her dad’s opening up a new strip club (also called no angels bc he’s trying to lowkey make it like a chain) n he’s only allowed her to make the move bc she’s overseeing it kind of???? as well as a few guys tht worked fr him back in queens. one in particular called billy hs made the move n he’s a menace so. three cheers fr anarchy!

PERSONALITY:

the kind of sour cherry only certain people have a taste for

once drank a bottle of whiskey, insisted she could still do a cartwheel and accidentally kicked an old man’s front tooth out in the process. proceeded 2 collapse into a flower bed and laugh so much abt it that she cried

barely takes anything seriously 50% of the time and is angry the other 50%

if she was a coffee she’d be black with five grains of sugar that you couldn’t taste until the last sip

high functioning alcoholic. if u ever see her w a coffee cup u jst kno tht one sniff will confirm high alcohol percentage. honestly idk hw she does it her liver must b yellin

loyal to a point of fault. if she cares abt u and u murder a man in cold blood she’ll brawl anyone that says ur guilty

honestly wld probably fight a person over anything. sometimes she’ll jst be having a bad day n she’ll burst n take it out on whoever says the wrong thing. a minefield!

has the worst luck in romance…. ever. the majority of her past bfs hav been absolute beasts n as a result she kind of has the ‘romance is dead n love is a lie’ mentality

speakin of which i feel like she’s bi bt wldnt have dated a girl or anythin. like guys r probably…. her preference just bc historically theyv treated her worse n she hs a very self destructive personality like that. sexy!

dresses like courtney love, 2014 sky ferreira and a character from this is england had a baby. mostly wears stolen clothes from strangers and jackets that swamp her. hair is p much always a wild mess n she usually hd kind of smudgy/smoky makeup bcos apparently she’s allergic to combs and generally looking presentable… relatable content

she’s v sarcastic. sometimes blunt. kind of has a habit of…. assessing a person n she’s quite perceptive bc she’s been trained to b by the way she always has to monitor her dad’s expression fr the slightest emotion change. she’s quite confident n can p much mke a conversation out of whatever. sort of independent too like she hs a bunch of friends bt she doesn’t care abt going out places alone if she’s in a certain mood n jst wants…… to get into chaos. she’s probably kind of known around campus bt itd b a 50/50 balance between bein known as intimidating n bein known as that one girl tht always gets into anarchy

likes: fishnets, stealing cars, throwing watermelons off rooftops and whiskey

dislikes: amy schumer, honesty, yellow tulips and going home

PLOTS:

someone tht got a job at the new strip club her dad opened up in town?? either as a dancer or bartender or whtever. just a forewarning it’s probably gna b a pretty..... seedy and Not That Pleasant environment bc it’s like. a crime hotspot inevitably bc it’s a gang hangout so. ur chara wld truly be in fr a rollercoaster ride to say the least

she deals coke fr her dad’s gang bt it’s more like. a hobby than a steady source of income tht she Needs bc she just likes the thrill of the fact tht encounters in tht line of work can turn sour tbh. a Thrill Seeker! mayb she deals to ur muse??

anyone….. she’s brawled in the past like. she’s literally a menace i cnt express this enough. wil jst randomly throw a drink in someone’s face fr no reason bc she’s bored. she’s probably pissed off 1000 diff ppl in 1000 diff ways. the possibilities r endless n i jst think tht’s a sexy prospect!

fwbs perhaps??? exes??? (probably ws a tumultuous relationship wtever…. ur muse is like like bradley is. a handful)

mayb someone tht she met at an aa meeting when she hd to go fr a court mandated thing one time after bein arrested fr public indecency. i feel like there’s probably a rly expensive statue somewhere thts fancily Sculpted n she like. did a flying kick n kicked the dick of it off n gt arrested fr it

ppl she……. Goes Wild Goes Crazy w. truly jst the most self destructive person alive so anyone w a similar mindset wld b a hellish bt fun combination

on the contrary a gd influence cld b nice perhaps? like someone tht genuinely cares abt her n she jst doesn’t kno hw to compute it

um. honestly the world’s our oyster. hmu n we cn brainstorm if none of tht catches ur eye!

[sethkate]

savannah A to Z pls

A = Aftercare (What they’re like after sex)

well in the beginning, since she and caleb were usually putting their clothes on and hurriedly being like ‘ok thanks bye!!!’ which savannah hated, i think now that they are Grown and in a relationship, she takes more advantage of the time they can spend together?? the only exception to this is, if time prevents them from doing aka if they spend 1 more second in bed they’re gonna be suuuper late to work. otherwise she’s all about cuddling, maybe just talking and catching up on each other’s lives since they have really opposite schedules and what not?? probably with a shower thrown in and definitely donuts in bed.

B = Body part (Their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

savannah likes her legs because caleb loves them tbh. her favorite body part on him is probably his dimples. also like…..every bit of him that is tattooed which i know is a lot but IDC.

C = Cum (Anything to do with cum basically… I’m a disgusting person)

sav isn’t grossed out by it as much as some girls can be??? she doesn’t throw a fit you know, if it’s in her hair or on her clothes or anything. and when it comes to swallowing her feelings can be summed up by this gif:

and on that note the rest is gonna be under the cut lmao

D = Dirty Secret (Pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

there was One time when sav had to be treated for an sti and it still haunts her to this day. like she was pressured into not using a condom (and i say that loosely bc she was prob pretty drunk so didn’t need much convincing tbh) and then unfortunately a week or so following the incident she found out what a true piece of shit the guy was. and then slashed all of his tires and broke his car windows in true savannah fashion :)

E = Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?)

she’s more experienced than she would care to admit. for a long time, sex was just sex to her, so she used it to fill different voids. she didn’t really treat her body like it was something that needed to be earned and gave it out a lot more willingly than she ever would now. so honestly she’s a bit embarrassed by the number, but it’s a good thing it will never get any bigger because she’s only going to be with caleb now forever yay!

F = Favorite Position (This goes without saying. Will probably include a visual)

if they are having sex just to fuck around and get off (x) (x) cause they’re probably on the couch or in the car or something but y’know if they’re actually like makin love or whatever def something more like (x) so it’s more personal and they can ‘bond’ and what not lol.

G = Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc)

in life in general i think she’s way less serious than caleb, so she’s probably a bit more playful and goofy when they’re in the moment together. there are probably times when things are a bit more dire like their many, MANY instances of break-up, apology, or angry sex which wouldn’t call for that kind of humor, but for the most part she keeps it pretty light and probably tries to bring it out of caleb too.

H = Hair (How well groomed are they, does the carpet match the drapes, etc.)

savannah keeps up with shaving pretty regularly. most of the time she’s hair-free, but when life is nuts she might occasionally have a little stubble here and there.

I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment, romantic aspect…) 

for not having like A+ role models to demonstrate how to be soft and tender and intimate with someone, sav is pretty good at it. she loves caleb so she’s very into making sure that his needs are met?? which is crazy bc savannah would usually be selfish af and only care about herself. but she’s really attentive at making sure caleb gets the attention that he wants and that he walks away satisfied.

J = Jack Off (Masturbation headcanon)

both she and caleb are good at getting themselves off. once skype sex had to come into the picture because of the long distance thing and it was the only thing they could do, savannah became comfortable with touching herself and also adjusted to having someone else watch her do it. where before it may have been more of a private thing, once caleb moved to boston, all bets were off so sav got pretty into it. 

K = Kink (One or more of their kinks)

exhibitionism and agoraphilia are probably the biggest two coming to mind, mostly because of the riskiness that each of them involves. sav will eternally be an adrenaline junkie so anything that gives her a thrill like that will be something she’s into.

L = Location (Favorite places to do the do)

hotels probably!! ever since their first anniversary thing, there’s just something sav loves about spending a weekend in a place with a view, a massive bed, someone to clean the sheets daily, big showers/bath tubs and room service. it just has lots of luxuries that they don’t regularly have when they are at home, so whenever they make a reservation somewhere savannah goes big or goes home.

M = Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going)

honestly a few shots of tequila and a beer or two and she is Ready To Go. but it’s because she’s already suuuper attracted to caleb. like his almost quiet cockiness, lil bit of hard exterior/bad boy look, the tattoos. he really just has to look at her and smile and she’ll melt the big damn sap. but she is 100% about ass grabbing too. that’ll also do the trick.

N = NO (Something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

other than like..the real gross bodily fluid nonsense sav probably wouldn’t ever consider a threesome. like maybe she had a stupid meaningless one before and i’m sure she can caleb joked about it in the past (him obvs wanting to have two girls and sav saying she would prefer two guys) but i don’t think it’s something she would ever do with caleb. the thought of him with another girl drives her nuts, let alone seeing it up close and personal and having to go along with it?? no way jose!!

O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc)

usually giving because in her experience a lot of guys don’t know wtf they are doing lmao. so she’d rather just get off a different way or by herself bc nothing is worse than lying there and either waiting for them to figure it out or having the mood killed bc you’re trying to explain to them in detail wtf they are doing wrong. sav’s extra giving when it comes to caleb though and she’s never really been shy about her talent with it either. so lucky him!!

P = Pace (Are they fast and rough? Slow and sensual? etc.)

depends on how much time she has. she’s proficient when she needs to get the job done quickly and knows what works and what doesn’t in a time crunch. but if there’s time to draw things out (although it’s usually hard for her to move at a slow pace in her life in general) sav has the capability of mellowing out a bit during sex. 

Q = Quickie (Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.)

i feel like with their lives, probably a good 70% is probably quickies simply because they just can’t ever get the timing, the place, the circumstances, etc. right. so it’s kinda just something that they are used to. but it’s always so nice when they actually can take their time with things and thoroughly enjoy each other. i imagine they probably make time to have sex 4-5 days out of the week, but more if they can manage it. 

R = Risk (Are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc.)

savannah’s entire life is a risk??? so she’d be pretty down for anything. 

S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go for, how long do they last…)

for a smoker and someone who is 100% against working out, her stamina is pretty good. she can probably go 2-3 times in a day and she usually lasts about as long as caleb does. they’re pretty in sync with one another!

T = Toy (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?)

sav probably had to invest in some when they were doing the long distance thing. like before caleb if she wanted sex she could just go out and get it, but when her bf lived hundreds of miles away she had to get a little bit more creative. so she’s probably got a collection of a few things after trying different ones trying to find something that did the most comparable job to caleb haha. probably made darren go with her into the store too and i am literally Dying at the visual.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

i feel like savannah teased caleb a loooot more in the beginning?? because there was that whole cat/mouse chase element to their relationship. but now that she has him, she doesn’t need to lay it on super thick the way that she used to. but she’ll still do it in small ways if she needs to get his attention or something.

V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make)

savannah usually doesnt restrict herself in volume when they have sex, which is just one of the trillllion reasons her neighbors hate her lmao. i mean she has a loud mouth outside of the bedroom sooo if that’s any indication. usually it’s just a lot of moaning, panting and probably swearing too knowing her. 

W = Wild Card (Get a random headcanon for the character of your choice)

i’d say savannah doesn’t remember probably more than half of her sexual experiences. i feel like since she didn’t take them very seriously, most of them were liquor/drug fueled some probably even borderline consensual since there’s no way she could have had any idea what was going on. 

X = X-Ray (Let’s see what’s going on in those pants, picture or words)

(x)

Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?)

it’s always kinda been on the higher side and then i think once she got with caleb and saw how good sex could be, especially when it was with someone you care about, it went up tremendously to the point where she can be pretty insatiable at times.

Z = ZZZ (… how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

it depends.... because usually sav and caleb are running on -138 hours of sleep so if that’s the case, they can fall asleep pretty quickly afterward. if they have more time to kill and more chinese food to finish they’ll probably just take a break and sleep it off later. 

[seabunnii]

Surprise! Am here for the oc asks and to spam you with numbers bc they're all so interesting~ how about 1, 5, 9, 11, 12, 16, 23, 26. 29, 30, and 40 for Vittorio and Lusca :D

HECK YEAH STRAP IN thank youuuuuuuuu and definitely going under a read more GOSH ;;U;;

1. How do they move and carry themselves? Pace, rhythm, gestures, energy?

Vittorio: He carries himself like, well, royalty. Very proper and controlled, but with a lot of emphasis behind each of his movements, like an undeniable presence of authority. Even with that though he’s good at passing it off, or sharing the authority, and very mindful of how he stands with others, knows when to step back, or angle so he’s facing who he wants everyone else to listen to. There’s usually not a quick pace to what he does, like things don’t seem rushed, but they’re not slow either. Overall, a very steady rhythm and energy. Gesture wise he is very brought up in doing bows, or making sweeping gestures - however, a lot of his time spent around soldiers has made it so a lot of casualness naturally found its way into how he moves.

Lusca: On the flipside, somewhat laid back - most of the time. If he feels he needs to be alert definitely can pick up the pace and move a lot quicker, but in a relaxed setting is naturally a pretty calm person. Coming from living in the ocean there’s also a more natural grace to the way he moves, even on land. So there’s always kind of a swimmer-like quality to things he does, very flowy. However he also is definitely one to have a lot of hand gestures when talking excitedly, and in general shows excitement most with gestures via perking up, bounces, etc. 

5. How do they dress? What styles, colors, accessories, and other possessions do they favor? Why?

Vittorio: Purple is his main color FOR SURE. But most colors he actually wears are blacks and golds, but purple is there since it is traditionally the color of royalty (and a little more literally with him given purple eyes, lol). But mostly dark colors simply because it looks good. Accessory wise actually not much, except when it’s required for royal ceremonies, etc. Also favors ribbon hair ties. Honestly prefers pragmatism over dressing too wild, though still wears things that look good/show some royal bearing. It’s just mostly in the way he was raised. (secret: incredibly rare to see but there have been a few times when his little sister has absolutely covered his hair in bows)

Lusca: Honestly like most merfolk is very attracted to shiny accessories, so would probably go crazy with jewelry like accessories if given the chance. Color-wise it’s all warm colors, simply because it reminds him of home, a fairly tropical environment. Other than that he’s pretty much happy wearing whatever he’s provided with since hey, he comes from the ocean and like merfolk are basically nude 24/7 :’D

9. How do they manifest energy, exhaustion, tension, or other strong emotions?

Vittorio: Energy is definitely a lot of just trying to get things done. Lots of talking if he’s with people, or giving directions. Exhaustion is something he tries not to show so it’s a lot of patient smiles and nods, and also getting things done but doing it so he can go rest or escape the situation. Tension is something he’d also try to hide, but would probably have a harder job at. Overall, is very much the type to try and keep extremes reigned in, but catching him in a particularly high energy/good mood type scenario where he can be free to express himself more is a lot more smiles and laughs. Whereas him being exhausted/stressed and in a place where he’s expressing it - that’s very very bad.

Lusca: Very much an open book! High energy he is basically like a puppy dog (which seems ... like a match for obvious reasons x3 ). Exhaustion shows too, though if he has a job to do he’ll be determined to pull through it. And it takes a lot to make him tense since he’s got such a naturally relaxed attitude. But basically, much more open, his strong emotions are clearly visible.

11. How are they vocally expressive? What kind of voice, accent, tones, inflections, volume, phrases and slang, and manner of speaking do they use? 

Vittorio: Has an accent for sure, and also very proper way of speaking. Has lost some of that again from time spent outside of royal court, and has definitely done impressions of “country” or I guess whatever equivalent/rural accents much to the amusement of his friends because of how weird it sounds coming from him. Also, is a master of passive aggressively saying things in the royal court and twisting things into “royal nice speak” so he can get away with insults that go unnoticed. Naturally he speaks with a calm tone, and again, if he gets angry and actually yells that is dangerous. 

Lusca: Is the one who probably has a rather weird accent without realizing it. Merfolk can mimic humans, but when actually going so far as to speak it will probably say phrases slightly strange, or get words mixed up. Also there’s a lot of things he just doesn’t have the word for since it’s not something that would’ve been around where he lived/something that humans around him would’ve been talking about. 

12. How are they bodily expressive? How do they use nonverbal cues such as their posture, stance, eyes, eyebrows, mouths, and hands?

Vittorio: Usually stands straight up, keeps hands to himself and if he makes gestures makes them count, or have authority. His eyes are probably the most expressive, but even then, he’s pretty good at controlling physical expression. He is one to typically also match the group of people he’s with in terms of physical cues/gestures though.

Lusca: Fairly expressive! Just basically does whatever feels right, or whatever comes most naturally so many hand waves, expressions are all easy to read on his face. 

16. Do they dream? What are those dreams like?

Vittorio: Yeah and they vary! A lot are probably related to magic or more just feelings of energy, but there’s also probably just dreams of palace life or things that have happened or related to things he’s read (or games his little sister has made him play). There are also probably nightmares of things happening to those he cares about :’D

Lusca: Most of his dreams are probably about the ocean!

23. How do they respond to difficult social moments? What makes them consider a social situation difficult?

Vittorio: Politely tear the other person apart via words. Or, if it’s a situation where he can, simply pull his authority as prince and make the situation go his way. For him to consider a situation actually difficult it takes a lot, but it commonly involves members of the royal court questioning his decisions or questioning things he believes in.

Lusca: Is not really used to human interaction enough to find things difficult/wouldn’t realize it was difficult until later. So he’d basically just honestly be saying how he felt/possibly getting himself into trouble. 

26. How do they view and feel about relationships, and how might this manifest in how they handle them, if it does?

Vittorio: Listen, everyone definitely tried to force into him the whole “marriages for convenience/position” because he’s a prince and has to do what’s “””proper””” ... which unfortunately (or maybe not hehe) could do nothing to stand against the influence of all the romantic fairy tales and love stories his little sister “forced” him to read to her. So he’s actually quite the romantic and 100% is the type to chase after true love and do whatever it takes - once he gets over the small part of him that is still trying to fulfill all his duties as prince, but once he lets that go, there will be romantic gestures galore and a lot of compliments/affection/everything.

Lusca: Romantic relationships are highly regarded in my merfolk lore. Like, it’s usually you find your person and that’s it. And marriage is something super serious. So for him it’s something that will be much more natural in, if he loves a person that’s that and it will be very easy for him to express it. Though also, physical affection isn’t something just shared between romantic partners for merfolk, so is just naturally a much more cuddly person. 

29. What kind of activities, interests, and hobbies do they have? What significance and impact do these have in their lives, both positive and negative?

Vittorio: Lots of reading! And also practice fighting/practicing magic since those usually go hand in hand for demons. Both things are really only positive, unless you count that part of why he goes sparring so much is that he does enjoy fighting. There just aren’t many chances for it (and very rare chances for him to use his full power - though he also wants to not have to use it, and advocates for peace not fighting but, that drive is still there). Reading is just his way of learning as much as possible and keeping himself “well-rounded”. 

Lusca: Reading - once he learns how to. x) But other than that does swimming count as a hobby for merfolk...I think probably not, Collecting things probably, since most merfolk are hoarders, albeit, he did it with more good intentions as the clan (BEST WORD I CAN USE TO DESCRIBE HOW IT WORKS IN MY LORE) is not the type to attack humans and take it from them then, but rather finding it more “little mermaid” style (haha). Treasure hunting I guess is the easy way of describing this?? and travel too probably counts as a hobby since that’s what he wanted to do and that’s what he did! :D

30. What is their preferred level of activity and stimulation? How do they cope if they get either too little or too much?

Vittorio: A decent amount. He’s usually pretty active and always has plenty to do. But when he doesn’t have as much activity/stimulation it can actually be a pretty good break and nice chance to relax and unwind a bit.

Lusca: Definitely the more energetic type who likes to do a lot, and if he is pent up for too long gets a little antsy. 

40. What do they wonder about? What sparks their curiosity and imagination, and why? How is this expressed, if it is?

Vittorio: Mainly interested in politics and magic studies, and mainly because both are so wrapped in everything about his life. A particular interest for him is healing magic because it’s one of the few branches of magic that doesn’t come naturally to him, and he wants to improve it. This is expressed through practicing it, of course, and both things through reading more about the subjects. 

Lusca: EVERYTHING. Really, he is just curious about lots of things and this just comes in the form of asking questions about everything he doesn’t understand.