#because he's a troll who always has to get the last word in

[allastoredeer]

He's a jokester ♪~ ᕕ(ᐛ)ᕗ

Bonus below the cut!

[everparanoid]

Headcanon: University student! Alhaitham

University student! Alhaitham x gn! reader

tags: fluff - word count: 1.9k

The Unrequited Academic Rival

Alhaitham, as a student, is a blunt, nonchalant overachiever. He hands in his essays the week after the questions drop and nearly always receives a first. He comes to lectures to consolidate the notes that he has already taken. He is the definition of working smarter, not harder. He refuses to tutor people as it would be a waste of his time. The last person who asked for his help was met with the most intricately worded insult, which was so soul-destroying that they dropped out of the university. Frankly, it is safe to say that Alhaitham is the antithesis of you. As a result, you don’t get along at all.

The first time you met Alhaitham, you found him cool and attractive. You had walked into the class to see him already seated, leaning back in his chair, with his legs crossed over the other and the book for that week in hand. You sat across from him, and opened your book, feeling the intimidation radiating off him. That feeling eventually faded when more people filtered into the seminar room and filled the silence with idle chitchat. You tried to remain quiet so as not to overrule the class with your incessant ideas when your professor asked a question about the set text. You, ever the overachiever, answered the posed question since it seemed no one else wanted to. Only for Alhaitham, who had been staring at his book with disinterest up until this point, to interject and counter your argument completely. You, upset and disgruntled, countered his counterargument and the bad blood started there.

Alhaitham seems out of reach to you and your peers. When Alhaitham is put in a study group together with you, the rest of your group refuses to communicate because they are terrified of the two of you and your very explicit distaste for each other—well, more so your very explicit distaste for him. Despite this, Alhaitham does not harbour the same feelings back. Alhaitham doesn’t treat you much differently from the others he has the displeasure of interacting with, the only thing that separates you is he puts a bit more effort into making your life as miserable as possible without doing much at all. Truly, Alhaitham only challenges you because he believes in your abilities and is intrigued with how far he can push you.

Alhaitham doesn’t give out his phone number easily nor does he use social media. Instead, he prefers to contact people via email, as it is easier and impersonal, and it separates university from private life. Your emails back and forth are as passive-aggressive and heated as your conversations in real life. It gets to the point where you both decide somewhere along the lines to aggressively email each other with your personal emails. You hadn’t thought anything of it, rather annoyed to be using your personal email to troll a troll. But for Alhaitham the concept of emailing you separately from everyone else like he does Kaveh, was different. It quickly turned from trolling each other, to asking questions about the module, to discussing mundane things like a shared journal between the two of you.

‘Alhaitham, (Please see attached) Saw that grumpy campus cat stuck in the trees this morning when Wriothesley was trying to help it down and thought of you. Worst, your worst nightmare.’ ‘Dear my worst nightmare, I’m flattered by the comparison to the grumpy campus cat. I must admit, there’s something appealing about the solitude of a good tree perch. Next time, I might just join the cat up there. Best, Your favourite tree-dweller. p.s. The library has got the latest novel by the author we were discussing, I thought you’d like to know.’

Alhaitham often and enthusiastically turns down all forms of leadership, wanting to stay as a simple student. He works part-time in the library as a librarian, but he doesn’t shush anyone making noise—not that people tend to when he is on shift, they mostly whisper and stare. He simply took it because it was a simple job, and he could earn ‘easy’ money doing absolutely nothing. This you found out against your will from Kaveh in one of his ‘Alhaitham is a shit housemate’ rants.

To your chagrin, he inexplicably has friends—each one, in your opinion, superior to him. Alhaitham is often seen strolling with his noise-cancelling headphones, seemingly oblivious to the world, while Kaveh (your mutual friend), Tighnari, and Cyno trail behind him, their words disappearing into the void. It irks you that Alhaitham’s presence seems to permeate every corner of your existence.

The campus bar, the usual venue for the TCG society’s socials, has become a battleground of sorts. Kaveh, the society’s vice-president, cunningly appointed Alhaitham as the treasurer. This means that every Wednesday, when you’re working your shift behind the bar, Alhaitham’s there too, smirking at you from behind his seventh glass. His arrogance is palpable, and you despise him for it. You’re certain he deliberately chooses the chair facing you, relishing the opportunity to bore into your soul whilst he thinks up the next email to pollute your inbox with.

Alhaitham is a frequent visitor to the campus gym, its convenience and proximity to his accommodation make it an ideal choice. Unfortunately for you, your residence is uncomfortably close to the gym, providing you with unwanted glimpses of Alhaitham’s comings and goings. Each sighting reveals him in varying stages of undress, each more tantalizing than the last. It’s infuriating that your academic adversary is also infuriatingly attractive. Alhaitham’s gym visits serve a dual purpose: they’re a means of maintaining his mental health, and they also provide him with amusement at your expense, as he’s noticed your scowls from your window.

Despite his aloofness and brutal rationality, Alhaitham is fiercely protective of the peculiar dynamic between you two. When Childe, the resident actual bad boy, tries to intervene in your ongoing feud, teaming up with him to undermine your argument, Alhaitham retaliates with a scathing insult. It’s so harsh that it prompts the professor to call an early break. Unfazed, Childe turns his attention to you, making yet another futile attempt at flirting. Ignoring him, you ask Alhaitham to step outside with you. He complies reluctantly, closing his book and following you out, aware of the curious classmates trying to eavesdrop. He is genuinely taken aback, though he hides it well, when you confront him directly for not allowing you to defend yourself.

Alhaitham is the type who doesn’t take it seriously when you start to actively ignore him. He thinks that you are just being immature and that it’s none of his business because he doesn’t care. However, he notices how you stop responding to him when he counters your points in class. He notices how you don’t respond to his random miscellaneous emails. He notices how you acknowledge Childe in the coming weeks. He notices that on Wednesdays, when the TCG society hosts events in the campus bar, you are no longer on shift. He notices how you seem to be studying with Kaveh, his housemate, late at night in the library when he is not on shift, something he overhears you saying to someone in class. He notices how your curtains are shut when he passes your window after and before a gym session. He doesn’t realise when it began to bother him, but when it does… it does.

Alhaitham is the type who doesn’t have a strict routine, but at least has one that is strict enough that people know when to avoid him on campus. So, when Alhaitham starts to go to the campus bar at random times during the week, it freaks out faculty and students. Alhaitham only starts to do this to test the theory that you are ignoring him. To which, he proves true when he finds you grinning and serving Childe, who looks too comfortable standing off to the side of where you are serving, watching you like you’re his latest conquest. Alhaitham places his laptop down on a spare table and joins the queue after a moment of lurking. When he reaches the front and orders a drink, your smile drops, and you make his drink coolly without the joyous energy you had for everyone else. Thus, continuing to prove his hypothesis correct. At first, Alhaitham is fine with it. He doesn’t care that you ignore him, but then he overhears you accept a date with Childe after class one day when he is leaving the classroom, and the thought of you, who he knew was disinterested in Childe, accepting the offer of a date, bothers something inside him. Even though he knows you’ll never date Childe.

Despite the palpable shift in your dynamic, Alhaitham conceals his disquiet, accepting the fleeting moments of attention you afford him during your forced collaborations on group projects. He persists in engaging you in class debates, a futile attempt to prove that nothing has changed, even when it’s Childe who responds instead of you. He feigns absorption in his book when he overhears Childe’s flirtatious overtures during seminar breaks. Yet, despite his outward nonchalance, his isolation intensifies until even you can’t ignore the change in Alhaitham.

The tension reaches a boiling point when Alhaitham intrudes on your study session with Kaveh in the library, much to your bewilderment and annoyance.

“What is he doing here?” you hiss at Kaveh, who dismissively gestures towards Alhaitham.

“I’ve had enough of walking on eggshells around both of you and your unresolved emotions. It’s time to behave like adults and move on, or express your concerns to each other directly, right here and now.” Kaveh retorts, mindful of the library’s quietude. You glance around the sparsely populated space and spot Wriothesley, the bad boy president of the boxing society, and his partner engrossed in their own world. You refocus your glare on Kaveh and Alhaitham.

“You’re acting as if we ever liked each other,” you counter.

Kaveh gives you a pointed look. “You do. Obviously.”

 “No, we don’t. Right, Alhaitham?” you turn to Alhaitham, expecting him to concur.

He sits with his arms crossed, the tips of his ears red.

“Told you,” Kaveh says triumphantly, jabbing his pen into the table. He rises, gathers the architecture books he’s been referencing, and prepares to depart. But not before he points aggressively between the two of you and says: “Sort this out before I get back.”

He exits before you can flip him off.

You turn to Alhaitham, perplexed. “You don’t like me, right?” you question.

“I never said I didn’t,” he replies calmly.

Despite the new budding romance between you two, you steadfastly refuse to go on a date with Alhaitham until your final exam results are released. Alhaitham, ever the enigma and your unrequited academic rival, continues to challenge you in class. His aversion to public displays of affection, both verbal and physical, keeps your newfound status discreet. You find yourself engaging in these intellectual duels with renewed vigor. The constant tension doesn’t escape your professors, who seem to have grown accustomed to your ongoing rivalry, likening it more to an old bickering married couple rather than enemies. When your final grades for the class are released, Alhaitham is quick to email you with a location and a table reservation for your date before you even have the chance to check your results. When you do, as everyone expects, both of you land on top.

masterlist

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[ashdreams2023]

Hello! Can u do one where Snape and student reader has a platonic bantering relationship? Like Snape favors them a lot and students and teachers clearly notices but Snape and Student likes to go back and forth with petty insults. Kinda like making the other students and professors confused if Snape actually favors them or not. But when someone insults the other they would passionately defend them. Something along the lines of "only I can insult Snape/Student" It can be like Snape is complaining abt Student to McGonagall then suddenly McGonagall agrees and adds her complaints making Severus defend student suddenly. Or when Student is complaining to her friends abt how awful Snape is but when her friends insult him she also defends him. HAHAHAHA i don't know if it makes sense so I understand if u can't make it lol.

Git

Platonic severus snape x reader

Severus didn’t like when students disrespected him, just because he’s young didn’t mean he wasn’t worthy out it.

That’s one of many reasons he’s so strict, students just learn to stay out of his way like that but then again there we’re always the ones who just didn’t get the hint.

And one of them was you.

Honestly you were bound to be trouble the second you opened your mouth in his classroom, left him gritting his teeth and furiously angry at the house you were from.

You were blunt, annoying and hotheaded.

"But Professor just one last chance! You need too you know this was not my best performance!"

"Sounds like a you problem."

It would be like that then after some more nagging he would give in because you we’re starting to give him a headache and he couldn’t give you detention for asking for help.

At one point he just gave up with your tactics all together and what made it worse was that you kept your promises, you did your work, participated in class, and regardless of the back talk and half assed comments at each other you were not, dare he say…insufferable but just more tolerable than most.

Although minerva likes to say you’re his favorite but he denies it every time, he doesn’t have favorites and he merely tolerates you.

"Severus due give this to young miss [——] when you go to the great hall"

"Do I look like an owl Minerva?" He said irritated.

The older professor gave him a look before he groaned and took the textbook and went on his way to the great hall where students were starting to gather in for lunch.

The great hall was buzzing with chatter, students were too busy to notice him enter and he liked it that way, he looked around then landed his eyes on you sitting on the gryffindor table to his pleasure, chatting with potter and granger.

He approached you slowly but stopped when he heard potter mentioning him.

"I swear I can’t do it anymore! If I get another troll on my next assignment I’m gonna try convincing Dumbledore that it’s not necessary in the curriculum"

"Don’t be dramatic, potions just need some focusing and if you tried not picking fight with snape things would be easier, I know he’s an ass but come on" you replied.

Hermione cleared her throat "it’s Professor Dumbledore Harry and professor snape to you!" She pointed at you but you just shrugged "moral of the story she’s right Harry you just need to focus, try to pay attention in class instead of neglecting your grades just to spite professor snape"

Harry crossed his arms "easy for her to say, she’s his favorite, it’s honestly starting to piss me off! He’s a git who only cares about his own house and I hope he does get that dark arts position at least then he would leave hogwarts one way or another!"

Harry regretted his words the second they left his mouth, the look you gave him was a mix of shock and angry.

"What is wrong with you?! I know he’s a git, he’s unfair and sometimes plain unreasonable when he feels like it but wishing death on him just because you dislike him!"

"[——] calm down Harry didn’t mean it like that!"

"That’s not-"

"That’s exactly what you meant Harry! He’s mean but he’s not a monster" you said all of that while not realizing snape was standing right there, watching and observing the whole thing.

It made his chest a tad tight, he hated the feeling but the look of absolute shame on Harry’s face made him satisfied.

Maybe he does have favorites.

"Snape? What are you doing with my textbook!" You said finally noticing him standing there with you transfigurations textbook. He scoffed and handed you the textbook.

"You brats would lose your head if it they weren’t attached to your body"

You frowned and took your textbook from him.

"I remember important stuff…like washing my hair" you smirked

Snape glared at you, screw what he just thought, you were still annoying.

[spotty-bee]

I watched the three Troll Movies the last few days and got inspired to make an Au! I was like, what would happen if a troll didn't turn grey all the way? What if they had lost hope, but not all of it? So I thought drew some fun designs and here they are!

Basically King Peppi was separated from Poppy's group and ended up with Viva's, causing poppy to think her dad is dead and is more frightened of the Burgens because of it. She starts to get grey marks on her body, but thanks to her still somewhat happy, bubbly personality, she doesn't go fully grey. The group has leadership issues since Peppi is gone, with a lot of infighting about what they should do and where they should go. Rebuilding society is a lot harder on the group, which is why it's so easy for kids like Poppy to get lost in the shuffle, nobody to really, fully take care of them.

Branch, still grey after the loss of his grandma and abandoned by his brothers, is there for Poppy when the adults are busy fighting or Poppy's friends have to go home. The two have a lot more in common in this Au, both fearing Bergans and their possibly return. So Branch gets her to help build his bunker with him, as well as explain his backstory to her far earlier than the movies.

Eventually the Burgans DO find them as the adults make too much noise both partying and fighting over what to do. Poppy and Branch are the only ones to realize and Poppy manages to convince her friends and a few others to hide in the bunker with them. More Trolls are lost to the Bergans but Poppy is fully recognized as leader by the ones she's saved. Branch and Poppy both agree to abandon their current location, going deeper into the woods where the foliage is so thick no Bergan can enter. Though there are a lot of dangerous wild animals and very little light. The entire town starts living in bunkers interconnected by tunnels. Rarely singing or dancing. They remain pretty undisturbed until the events of either the second or third movie... depending on weather Poppy got the pop string or if Peppi took it with him.

Other than that, Viva and Clay are the ones who carry out the events of the first movie. (Its not quiet the same, Creek is with Poppy's group and still a coward that gets kicked out, but he doesn't effect Viva and Clay's story.) For the second I'm leaning toward Peppi taking the string with him (but that can be changed), so Barb attacks the Putt Putt Trolls instead. However Viva and Clay also handle that, and Viva manages to steal Barb's heart in the process. (I'm not sure if Barb is the same age as Poppy or not, but in my Au she's between Poppy and Viva in age, so its fine.)

So right now its not until the time around the third movie that Branch and Poppy make contact with their siblings. Branch is more cold and doesn't talk much outside of to Poppy. Poppy is more withdraw, reserved and nervous. Both have continually greyed under the stress of taking care of their people, fighting off predators, getting supplies and hiding from Bergans. However Poppy's hope for her people has kept her going and Branch's belief in Poppy keeps him going.

Branch and Poppy also get together sooner than the movies, as they knew each other longer. (Poppy has a brief stint of dating Creek first before he betrays them and gets kicked out. ) Their relationship is good, they can talk without words and are almost always on the same page, but they also feed each other's anxieties and pessimism. Once reunited with their families and the more nitty gritty details have been sorted out (Who's the Pop Queen, ect, ect.) the two actually have to be separated for their own health, as they keep feeding each other's fear, dreaming up worse case scenarios and how to get out of them, trying to make a new bunker, hording supplies, ect. This temporary separation gives them a chance to get to know their families again.

Poppy didn't remember Viva at all in the third movie, so I don't think she'd remember her father either in this AU. So she has to build a relationship from scratch with people who already love her in Putt Putt Pop Village. Branch, meanwhile, hates being away from Poppy and hates his brothers who abandoned him. (Though deep down he really wants them back in his life.) It also doesn't help that he has essentially gone from a perpetually dark, dangerous forest to the brightly lit, busy beaches of Vacay Island, getting constant over stimulation. He's very resistant to his brother's help at first, but eventually realizes that their just trying to improve his health (Physically and mentally) and that fighting it is just hurting Poppy. (Poppy makes a turn about much easier than Branch does, reversing some of her greying. However when she and Branch get to visit during the temporary separation, Branch actually causes some of it to come back, which is when he realizes the others are right and tries to do more to get better himself.) After they do improve they're free to do as they please and reunite as an even better couple.

As for the events of the third movie with Floyd, either Viva helped the brother save Floyd by stealing him back, still inside the diamond prison, or Floyd gets taken after these events.

Anyway! Thats what I have for now! Let me know what you think and if you have any ideas or questions!

[starfxkr]

Mackin’

All the times Pope Heyward suspected his best friend was mackin on his little sister.

A/N: this is my first time writing anything fandom related since I was 14 to say I’m rusty is an understatement

The first time there wasn’t much weight behind it. She newly 15 and JJ was 16 and it was the day after her birthday.

He gave her his “Birthday Girl Special” aka some extra potent weed rolled by yours truly. He snuck up behind her and tapped her on the lips with it with a smug Surprise!

She just rolled her eyes, mumbled thanks and skated off to her friends. So Pope ignored it because JJ flirts with anybody with a pulse and he’s not surprised his unamused sister isn’t an exception.

The second time is 2 summers later at his house.

. JJ helped him with some orders and Heyward decided to reward the two with some cold Cokes. Only Big Heyward was gone and now Little Heyward was put in charge which Pope hated because she was mean, and petty and liked to spit in drinks.

Except this time shes luckily in a good mood and decides to make floats with the ice cream she stole borrowed from the store and shes extra generous with the chocolate syrup she pours over JJs.

So much so its spills over the corner and she licks the side of his glass.

He calls her gross but she just snorts and says “Be glad I didn’t spit in it this time.” before flicking him with the water she used to clean her hands and walking out of the room.

Pope ignores the way JJ shifts uncomfortably once she’s gone.

The third time both siblings are out on the boat with JJ getting fish for the store.

Normally she’s very practical and sticks to wearing Pope’s old shirts (it’s not like she has many of her own) and quadruple lacing a rope around her dad’s shorts (she likes to joke she’s the son their father never had) but this time she’s wearing gym shorts from middle school and a bikini because its laundry day and she’s 18 and nobody call her what to do not even her daddy so Pope needs to shut the fuck up.

“JJs not gonna die if he sees my tits Pope he remembers when I didn’t have any.”

Of course JJ chimes in that the last time he saw them they couldn’t have been bigger than the palm of his hand, she’s filled out quite a lot since then. She just tells him to shut up so she can fix the trap.

Pope ignores how JJs eyes linger on her ass since it happened so quick it was probably an accident.

The fourth time is when Little Heyward is 19 and its Kildare County Fair time and Pope’s kicked her outta the house while he and Cleo get ready because she was making him anxious with her fluttering around. John B pulls up with the rest of the pouges in the Twinkie and this time JJs not as slick about the way his eyes trail down her body.

Because now Little Heyward isn’t all that little and he’d be lying if he said the way her tits looked in that shirt didn’t make his jaw clench.

So maybe he chose to stay with her in exile on the front porch while everyone else went inside just to keep her company.

Pope only looks out the window when Kie makes a comment about “putting a leash on his sister”. Sure Little Heyward can be kinda crude and a bit of a troll but she’s really harmless and he would appreciate if people would stop saying shit like that about her.

But he looks out and there she is with her popsicle halfway out JJs mouth and his hand is on her knee and they’re both laughing like its a joke but this time something about it makes his face hot.

He still ignores it because those two always get into a dick measuring contest of who can make the other more uncomfortable.

Then once they reach thefair the two disappear. For hours.

Pope thinks he sees the red of JJs cap on her head except every time his eyes seemingly land on them they disappear.

At the end of the night they reappear with the giant bear she’s been eyeing for years now.

She says JJ won it for her bc Archie’s been “fucking her for years” (her words not his).

Pope can’t ignore it this time.

Because even though this is probably the most innocent interaction they’ve had in years there’s grass stains on JJs knees and her skirt is twisted ever so slightly and theres a ring of lip gloss around his lips, dewy and faint.

JJs been mackin on his sister and he doesn’t know how long it’s been going on.

[gentlebeardsbarngrill]

02/13/2024 Daily OFMD Recap

TLDR; Kudoboard; CaseyBloys/David Zaslav Shenanigans; Cast&CrewSightings; Samba Schutte; Con O'Neill; Ruibo Qian; Wendy Andersen; In Person Events; WatchParties; LubeAsACrew; People of Earth; Articles; Netflix WooAsACrew; Love Notes;

== Kudoboard Last Chance ==

Throwing this up top so you don't forget-- anyone who wants to add anything to the Kudoboard please message me tonight so I can get you the password to post. I'll be up for the next two hours so we've still got time.

== Casey Bloys ==

Whelp, Casey Bloys stepped in it again by posting an article by The Wrap about how True Detective was the most watched season on max. As you can imagine, a good chunk of the crew started calling BS on that, what with the Parrot Analytics stats from yesterday. Well, some of our favorite hashtags started trending this morning... #OhBloysHeMad and #TheNumbersWereThere

And in case you needed to see some more data that Bloys was full of crap--- Thank you to our dear friend @quirkysubject for pulling in Rotten Tomatoes Average Tomato-meter Ranking in with the Parrot Analytics Data in this awesome chart!

Not terribly long after, apparently the comments on The Wrap article really started to irritate ol Casey boy because he turned off comments on the post.

BUUUUUUT Our dear crewmate @spanishjenkies was kind enough to save a video before hand! So there's evidence of the trolling. Visit their twitter thread here.

Some of the crew has decided to go a bit further with the glorious Passive Aggression and started sending Casey Bloys gifts! @single_cat_mom sent him a Casio Compact Calculator to help him with his future numbers!

Annnnd our crewmate @ofmooshd got a cockroach at the zoo named after ol Casey Bloys!

Truly legendary levels of Polite Menacing today, m'dears! What a day!

In other WB/Max related news:

Did you know there's a petition to get this ... person... fired? If you wanted to sign that, here you go: Only if you wanted to of course.

== Cast & Crew Sightings ==

= Samba BTS =

Samba went hog wild today with the BTS, some lovely folks on tumblr posted the videos. (THANK YOU SAMBA!)

Just a couple of highlights, please visit this post to see all the pictures. You can also visit Samba's IG.

BTS Video 1: Cast Reading - ty @fuckyeahworldoftaika,

BTS Video 2: Con & Rhys - @fuckyeahizzyhands

BTS Video 3: Izzy Flipping the Bird - @fuckyeahizzyhands

= Con O' Neill =

As usual, our favourite Unicorn, Con O'Neill is over here supporting the hell out of the saveOFMD effort and sharing the Parrot Analytics results.

= Ruibo Qian =

Our Venerable Pirate Queen Ruibo Qian is back on Instagram with more inspiring words for us.

= Wendy Andresen for #TaikaTuesday =

So I know that normally #TaikaTuesday is a thirst factory (and don't worry it still was) but I just had to make a shoutout to our absolute gem Wendy Andresen (one of our Red Flag crew) for posting a picture of her pup Peanut cosplaying as Taika for #TaikaTuesday.

For those of you unfamiliar with the reference shirt:

She was kind enough to post more too when asked!

I adore how much she supports the #SaveOFMD effort and she is always a delight to chat with. Sending all the love her way! <3

== In-Person Events! ==

Today at the Our Flag Means Death Matelotage Processional several of our crewmates came out in costume with signs and showed support at the WB Gates! Thanks to all the crew who attended! Thank you @aimeekitty for sharing these pictures! Their IG and Twitter

== Watch Parties ==

= Lube As A Crew =

It's baaaaack! Valentine's Day: 4PM PST, 8 PM ET, 12:00 AM GMT S1 Ep 8, 9 10 with @astroglideofficial

If you've bought Astroglide recently please consider doing some reviews! They would love the support. You can @Astroglide and use #ReviewAsACrew

As you can imagine, the memes are back too <3

== Feb 15: Uncle Season 1 ==

This is mainly for UK folks but non-uk folks are welcome to vpn in as well! Here's an article on how to join via vpn!

Thurs 02/15/2024 + Friday 02/15/2024 - GMT - 8 PM, ET - 3 PM, PST - 12pm

WatchParty Hashtags:

#ForTheNewUncle

#SaveOFMD

#AdoptOurCrew

== People Of Earth S1 Ep 5, 6 ==

#PiratesOfEarth has been going great these last couple days! Thank you again to @iamadequate1 for organising it! Next episode 5 and 6 tomorrow the 14th! at 10PM GMT / 5PM EST / 4PM CST / 2 PM PST /

== Netflix #WooAsACrew Video ==

More love for the streaming platforms! 🌹💕🐙 Vocals: @sgtbeatlespotter Video: @giulianaazr on Twitter

== Updated #WooAsACrew Calendar! ==

Looks like tomorrow the goal is to WOO FX! Twitter / Instagram / Tumblr Tomorrow is also a great day to be creative! Make some cakes! Or flowers, or drawings! Anything! Let's see some sweet stuff!

== Articles ==

Have we seen this one? I can't remember anymore, some more Parrot Analytics from January. Ty to @drcfxtina on discord for sharing!

== Uk Crew Updates ==

Thank you to @queerly-autistic for capturing this! Guess who's front and center on the top recommendations? You guessed it! OFMD!

== Love Notes ==

Hey there lovelies!! Guess what time it is? I've had too much caffeine and I've taken my adhd meds on time so I'm Here, Queer, and ready to Cheer!

Look at everything you all did today! Do you see this list? And that's just a minuscule coverage of the pure polite chaos that ensued! I literally cannot add any more pictures because just so much has happened. We are 36 days in the Gravy Basket and you all are just ramping things up!

The tenacity, and creativity of this crew never ceases to amaze me!

There are more fundraisers in the works... (I'll post more when I know more) there's a slew of events, watch parties, and pure camaraderie everywhere! Everyone's making amazing memes, and artwork and fics! Seriously, you all should be proud of yourselves!

Not to mention, some of the most important things of all-- I am seeing SO MUCH SELF CARE. You are reaching out to the crew for support, you're taking days off, you're having fun and being creative for you... getting back to pet projects and doing things you enjoy!

You all are doing SO WELL. You are kicking ass, don't forget that! We'll have our down days, but no matter what you are making waves all over the place, bringing positive things to this world! As a side note, I wanted to mention, I know tomorrow can be a tough day for a lot of people. It can be lonely, or bring up good or bad memories. Please be sure to reach out to your crew for love if you're struggling. We love you, and even if it's a platonic love, it's overflowing here for you. You are wonderful, and we want to send you all the love we can.

That being said, I'm gonna end tonight with another note from @thelatestkate that I needed to hear a lot recently so I'm gonna share it with you too <3

You got this! Sending so much love m'dears!

== Daily Darby / Tonight's Taika ==

These were the two gifs that murdered me today so I hope you enjoy. These goofy buggers always make my day.

Rhys Src: @bizarrelittlemew Taika Src: @ofmd-ann

[sgiandubh]

Out of the OL bubble

Sidenote: this post owes everything to the incredible sleuthing skills of an already longtime trusted friend, who wishes to remain discreet. All credit goes entirely to her - this is such an idiotic topic, yet the Ur Troll insists.

I answered one of you in the comment threads yesterday, that once you get the hell out of the OL bubble, things begin to make sense. Why? Well, because of distance and context, I suppose. And also because this always was the dirty little secret of our Dedicated Manipulative Trolls: to make you believe in a terribly poor narrative, fit for a linear world. A world without compromise, drama, secrets and lies. Collective lack of time, perspective and/or Internet research skills did the rest and gave birth to this monster: the OL Fandom.

We are now told and are supposed to believe that because Scottish Xena apparently chose on purpose (with this and only this, I could agree, but for opposite reasons) to show us she trains in a Cumbernauld gym, that means... well, you know the rest and it involves The Magic Golden Dirk. That troll was never exactly subtle, was she, bless her heart?

That mother and entrepreneur has a life of her own and an entourage of her own and business collaborations of her own and her own agenda. Some of it is shown on her Instagram account, most of it can be speculated. Connecting dots just for the sake of it is neither productive, nor remotely interesting.

Let's see, for example, how she reacts to a very insistent fellow German athlete, whom she is going to meet at the Hyrox Cologne event (13-14th of April, during the Landcon week-end):

😬😱

What is Flamingos Club? Nope, not an ikebana society, no:

Tee-hee.

They were there before, in good company, last year, when they actually first met (rings a bell?):

(April 2023, ok? I am still waiting for my own DeLorean)

Who is this guy?

Fellow athlete, HYROX Ambassador (something I bet the farm she wants to achieve) and a contestant in this year's German reality show First Dates Hotel, on VOX (https://www.vox.de/cms/sendungen/first-dates-hotel.html):

The concept is simple: a renowned German chef, Roland Trettl (no idea!) now takes his blind date cooking show to the next level, with singles from all over the country parked into a Spanish dream holiday resort (Mallorca), shake, stir and see whatever happens. The classical Endemol recipe, now produced by Twenty Twenty. It also has an UK version, running on Channel 4 (coincidence? I doubt that very much, thank you!).

On set, Max's 'love interest' is a certain Linda. He recently wrote her ' a sweet love letter', taking the good advice of his namesake cast friend Max-the-Bartender:

(I swear to God, I feel like I am prostituting my 🧠, right now).

There is obviously nothing to see, here (or is it, such as two wannabes desperately wanting limelight?). She leads the typical no strings attached life of a single mom and he is still looking for a real job:

Since VOX does not give his full name, neither will I. It took five minutes to find him, with a bit of luck.

Why on Earth would one connect that woman to S, rather than to this nice, ambitious Bavarian?

I know why. It's almost too damn easy.

Two words: Channel 4. Truman Show. Ginger and Fred (oops, these are Our Couple).

Is it anything we haven't seen before?

Nope. We've seen way worse. But gone are the Days of Flukenzie Floozy.

[Edited] - there is no need to further expose our people.

[viablemess]

I have a lot of feelings about the Durin Family, Fili in Particular

---Howdy folks it is that time of year again where i go absolutely feral for Fili Durin. He is underappreciated and tumblr has addressed that but i feel an URGE to add to the discourse so here I am. This post is not done, fyi. I will add more to it later.

It's 10pm/22:00. I just got home from class. I'm waiting for my ramen water to boil. There is a fireplace and some holiday lights. Let's have a (fireside)chat.

First of all, the constant tying of Fili and Kili together?? Like I get it. Merry and Pippin parallels. I love parallels (looking at you, George), but come on. Chill, just a tad. I know Tolkein didn't give you much to go by, but he didn't even write tauriel into the books or Bolg and yall ran with that anyways. Use your creative brains, pls, I'm actually begging you.

ANYWAYS. Have them develop separately even if only a little. Kili is the younger one, literally viewed younger bc he has the smallest itty bitty beard. He is not the heir, he is the spare, and could have some deep rooted personal insecurities about that as a result. He may feel that he deeply has to prove himself to Thorin bc he does not have a set role in the future like Fili does. Kili gets his romance with Tauriel, which--khgf;ushfw;e uneneccary, but I can appreciate the attempt to broaden the target market and appeal to a romance audience even if the previews did not hint at that happening at all so it would not have been a marketable trait per say but I digress. Again with the parallels of forbidden romance, poor Legolas still does not get any, we know, he was not even in the books really either, let's move on.

Kili is babied by the company, needs to prove himself, his mother made him promise to return to him so he is still deeply in the "coming of age" side of things (a lot of the company is, but that's a topic for another word vomit fireside chat). He begins to realize that he might like elves which goes against his family and he was already the spare, might as well go all in and fall in love with an elf. Fine. I can deal with that. But let's see more of Kili messing up, more so than just the trolls. Let's see him make silly goofy mistakes more. The company always tries to keep him out of the line of fire by making him an archer (heh) and keeping him off the front lines. They do everything to protect him, bc Dis is a terrifying woman, ansd if she made Kili promise to return to her, dammit, the company will return him to her if it is the last thing they do. Kili likely spends less time with Thorin and Dwalin than his brother, so here he is, questioning his own self worth and if he belongs in the party and his own abilities while coming of age and sticking out from his family even more, so why not rebel a little? why not be an archer which is not as glorified, why not consider shaving to meet cross cultural beauty standards, why not date the elf (dammit, I'm convincing myself for Tauriel's presence and I hate that). He's trying his best and messing up along the way, and is INNOCENT. Completely. He is aware of his ancestry and what happened, but he and Bilbo are the two being narrated to when telling of the Durin family history, and as a result, the differences in dwarven / hobbit culture could be explored further. Thorin has a little kiddo to watch out for, and maybe is softer around, because even Thorin knows Kili is young, maybe even too young to be here but if they didn't let him come he would have snuck after them, so we get to see a more forgiving, family-man Thorin who we do not see anywhere else (and yes we get that at the end of the movie but I'm getting to my critique of the (I almost called it a keldabe wrong fandom) forehead touch with a name I cannot recall later).

Onto his brother. Fili is the heir, okay. So, that means that he is likely raised very differently from Kili. Whereas Kili may have had some time to play and be a kid (as much as they could in the Blue Mountains as refugees, anyways), Fili likely was given no such privilege. He followed Thorin around like a lost puppy, watching his every move and trying to imitate it, because he knew he would have to do Thorin's job someday. Even if Thorin did get married / have a kid / etc there would likely still be a window where Fili was in charge before Thorin's kid came of age, and as the years went on, the chances of that happening diminished, and so Fili threw himself more and more into his crown-prince-studies. Maybe a little obsessively, just like his uncle, who had practically stepped into the role as father. Because Fili thought he had to be Thorin. Thorin, meanwhile, saw the King that Fili could be, and that King was so much better than him. Fili grew up humble as a result of them all being refugees, something Thorin did not have to learn until much later and even then he never fully got it. Fili was kind, because he saw the suffering of his people, and understood how large of a difference a small act could make. Fili also had the teachings of Thorin drilled into him, because Thorin's problem was that whenever he saw Fili, he also saw Frerin. Frerin was Thorin's younger brother, just as blond as Fili, and (I'm assuming) played a roll in Fili's name (both starting with F). Frerin died at the Battle of Azanulbizar, and Thorin remembers that battle, he remembers losing his little brother. He can understand the fear that Fili feels whenever the company encounters a fight because he has felt the same in the worst of ways. But, because Thorin understands, he pushes Fili to be better than him. Even if that pushing is too much, too hard, too fast, too young--Thorin knows that Fili can be better than him, and Thorin does not want Fili to suffer as he has suffered, so he does everything in his power to prepare Fili for what is to come, and because Thorin loves him, that is all he does. He pours that love out as motivation and pushes Fili to do more, do everything, and do it better than he did. Fili, being young, does not realize this. He just sees it as Thorin preparing him to be king, and quite brutally at that, but Thorin is the closest thing he has to a father, Fili is not going to question it, not for anything, except for his little brother. And that just hurts Thorin, because he knows that, had he had the chance, he would have died to save Frerin at Azanulbizar. He knows Fili would do the same for Kili, but they are both so, so young. Thorin fears he could lose them both in one go, if he is not careful. So he is harsh, he scares them, he is forceful, because they do not have time for care and coddling, that won't keep them safe.

Whereas the company sees Kili as carefree and fun, Fili is cold, like his uncle. He is stone, and observant, and polite. He has to be Thorin, AND everything that Thorin is not. It is an impossible task, but he has to try. That is what is expected of him, not just by his mother and uncle, but by the entire people that is behind him, waiting for him to ascend to be king. He does not get a choice. The only one who can pull him out of that rut is his brother, with whom he actually feels like he can be what he is -- barely older than a kid.

Im gonna let that sink in for a second. They're CHILDREN.

anyways.

So, Kili gets his romance plot. It's cute and it parallels. And I've established that Kili must prove himself, and Fili will bend over backwards to make Thorin happy, which likely also extends to Dis, his mother.

I imagine Dis gave Kili the river rock to come back home, and she told Fili "be safe, don't be stupid, etc etc" but HIGHLIGHTED "take care of your brother", and Thorin does the same in the movies.

So, when Kili galavants up the bridge to open the gate after the party does a little slip and slide down the river, Fili naturally goes with. He sees that Kili is about to get shot. And Fili, who knows above all else he has to be king and he has to take care of Kili, just does the normal heroric thing and jumps in front, and he gets shot.

He is chastized for it, for being stupid, but overall they both are thanked for getting them out of the mess, and there is no time to waste because the company has to leave, and Fili (like what Kili did albeit maybe with more conviction) will not let others help him, or show weakness. So Fili continues on, poisoned, and Kili has the guilt of knowing his brother took an arrow meant for him. Fili must suffer the consequences of being a hero, and Kili must suffer the consequences of being the youngest, and feeling guilty for not taking responsibility for his own actions.

This all boils over to a fight where Kili tells Fili that "I made the choice to go up there, I didn't ask you to intervene!" because dammit Kili wants to be treated like an adult and FIli just took that away from him, again.

Fili, naturally, retorts, "I just did what I had to, because you know what? mom didn't tell me to come home--all she told me, all everyone ever tells me--is to take care of you! So I don't matter, not to this family, not in the same way you do. You're a son. I'm a prince."

Which, ouch. Slap in the face to Kili, and maybe the company overhears. Kili feels slighted, but also maybe is starting to understand, he can be a kid, Fili cannot. And Fili, meanwhile, is about to break from the weight of expectations that feels heavier than the lonely mountain ever could.

So, Kili stays with Fili when they get to Bard's, because it is what Fili would have done for him. Thorin is pissed, but lets it go, because Kili isn't Fili, and ouch, again.

I imagine Bofur helps quite a bit, he has a kind soul and listens better than most, and while Fili is delirious with fever Bofur talks him through it. Kili gets to be more coherent with Tauriel, and we get to see if their relationship actually holds up outside of a "she saved my life I love her" style of interaction which bleh is cliche as all get out.

and PLEASE when the dwarves do get out of Bard's house, they get to actually help Bard deal with the dragon. I read a fic a long time ago (if I find it I'll link it and the author below) where Fili had to be Bard's arrow anchor instead of Bard's son and I just chef's kiss. The dwarves who are left get to help the humans, and they feel more sympathy for them. Maybe they witness more death, and so when the dwarves do turn their backs on the humans later, Fili, Kili, Bofur, Bifur & crew are like "wait wtf they have suffered enough" unlike their future indifference we see in the movie.

and THEN all the dwarves arrive at the mountain, and Fili and Kili actually get welcomed home like the family they ARE, but it's stunted, because something is wrong with Thorin. He is glad to see Kili and Fili, but barely spares them a glance. They've heard the rumors and stories, of gold sickness. They begin to wonder, and we get to see them talk (probably with Bilbo) about the concept in secret where everyone is looking for the arkenstone. We get to see Kili with his hero worship refuse to believe Thorin would fall under a gold thrall. We get to see Fili, who is afraid of becoming like Thorin, too scared to enter the treasury unless immensly pressured to do so, and even then someone is always with him, because he worries. He still holds the ruby Thorin threw at him, and he keeps it in his pocket. He holds it so tight the edges cut his palm, and the pain seems to distract him from the wealth that surrounds him. I always wondered if Thorin gave Fili that ruby because he was the heir, or the only dwarf with so much gold about their person, with his hair. It was what Thorin saw first, not because it was his nephew, but because he looked like the very thing that already clawed Thorin down into his own demise.

AND NOW the war starts. and this needs to be another post bc ffs I'm losing my shit this is much too long.

[mcbeetlebeeb]

I'm currently getting into a fandom that isn't homestuck, but I can't turn down a request :3

these will still be headcannons and- uhrm- yea

Gamzee Makara

He is, talking about some mystical shit dude

I think hed appreciate someone who just listens too him blabber

don't ask me why but he'd like to naw on you

not full fledged biting a chunk out of you

I think he's too aware of how sharp his teeth are to go biting down that hard, but yknow

nipping at you gently, but not before he was smothering you in sloppy clown kisses

this is real specific but I think hed have the type of eyes that you can't seem to keep eye contact with

he's just so much taller and just has this lopsided shiteating grin, that shows most of his sharp ass teeth

I'd like to think his eyes are always that half lidded gaze, especially when it's at you

but no intent behind the looks he gives, fuck- probably no thoughts either

lights on no one home

don't get me wrong, he's not dumb,

in the simplest sense hes a big ol airhead

yknow a dingbat, a bit of a scatterbrain

but he's not like- vegetable for a brain dumb as hell

and thats another thing, it's definitely really convincing to probably think that he's yknow, not all there

but it throws you off gaurd x2 when he'd get all close and murmur and mumble certain things too you

he looked like he had a maximum of 3 thoughts floating around in his brain

but here he is, mumbling in a low almost gravely tone, right by your ear

I love to think he's one of those tall people to rest his arm playfully on your head if your shorter, which you most likely are-

can't recall if I mentioned the last time sense I have a rubber ducky keeping track of my memory

but I think hed be cold all the time

not like, bothersomely fridged

but enough to make you shiver and squirm if he were to press his hand to your skin, noticeable enough for you to verbally go "Damn-"

also!! I think hed be a huge sucker for you just holding his face with your hands, letting him relax against you, eyes shut

still grinning a bit and letting that low rumbling purr come from him

and this also means playing with his hair,

pet him damn it he demands it

no, not really more like laying and being in your space, following you round until you pay attention properly too him

sense most trolls can't- yknow- go out in the middle of the day because of their intense asf sun, trolls are nocturnal

so like if you ever took a photo with him with flash his eyes would do that reflective thing that cats have

or for another example, yknow how in the dark the first thing you spot about your black cat is its eyes?

yeah that

like I said in the other headcannon thingy, he's just always lurking and looming, he likes knowing what your doing even if he's not involved

and this comes with him trailing around you like a dog that sees you have food and knows you'll give it too them at some point

wether it be from afar or close, don't assume he's not close by, him being a purple blood im sure he's well aware of how violent trolls can be,

but with you around! oh he can't let you wonder off too far- Alternia's atmosphere is dangerous and the fauna is even more dangerous-

so don't expect to go very far without him trailing behind you

but he'd understand if you explained too him you wanted time too yourself or with somebody else one on one

I dont think hed be a jealous person, maybe a lil possessive! but he's not overbearing with it

he just wants you safe and content, and he wants you too feel that way around him

have a song I think fits his uh? vibe towards? significant other? because 🎉

Dave Strider

mm have I said he's a genuinely a big goof?

but I think that'd be something someone gets right off the bat

maybe

if you can pick up on someone trailing off on tangents of meaningless words that can go on and on without someone actually ever responding

than it's pretty visable

I think itd be pretty adorable though (I know I'm gay, whatever)

like if he were to start talking about something, anything, and you gave a simple short response, he's gonna take that and run with it

especially if he likes you

I think hed definitely be one too stare

but how could you tell? he's always wearing those shades

probably a good reason why he wears them other than ironic purposes

so no one sees what or where or in this case who he's lookin at

constantly staring though, wether it's you having a conversation with you or, you doing something random he's just watching

no actual thoughts id like to say

just observing

watching you be you, do your own natural thing, picking up on the way you talk or gesture at stuff

I cannot urge this enough but I still firmly believe physical touch would be a very special thing too him

it's not impossible or looked down upon too be able to hold his hand or lean against him

but he'd be mentally noting each touch, each expression you make, listening intently too your tone, hoping your doing the same

but with these actions he'd be straight faced as always, but he can feel his hands tremble ever so slightly, he recognizes his heart beat picking up

unfamiliar with these feelings with how they're being presented yknow?

most times he ever feels this way he's in danger

but he knows he couldn't be safer right now, like he wants to believe that, it's not hard for him to believe it

but his body is just hardwired to tense up, clench his jaw and steady the shakey breathing

but being patient and respectful would melt those feelings away really easy I'd like too think

just sitting there and slowly showing affection, brushing thumbs against his knuckles, tracing over fingers

you focus on his hand, flipping it over and thumbing at his vaguely sweaty palm, hand still shaking faintly in your gentle grasp

he'd just stare at you, in disbelief and adoration, and realization that he doesnt need to be poker faced round you

that he doesnt need to put up a front to protect himself, the squishy parts of him he learned to shove away to get along with life

a big sigh of relief to say the least,

but once he realizes he doesn't need to be someone else for you, he can just be him, no expectations or demands, he can rely on someone else for once

you ain't ever gettin rid of him after that, he's not clingy but he's no longer keeping you at arms length, not now, not ever again

AND HE GETS MUSIC THING because he is my favorite right next too the crab man <3

author note: I feel this sucked a big booty buttload but I was already half way done with it when I dubbed it that, so have this anyway!!!

[piratefalls]

first list here.

round two i guess. i finally read 30 pages of a real physical book last night. progress? possibly. it felt right that while working on this "nothing's gonna stop us now" started playing. thinking about making this a wednesday thing. still trying to do a mix of new and old fics, even though it's all new to me. and much like alex claremont-diaz, this has been a mouthful. if you want me to tag you in any lists going forward, let me know!

Will You Brie Mine? by chamel

Today, as Henry tells him all about the Manchego, Alex tries his best to listen and not fixate on the mole next to the corner of Henry’s mouth or the way his shoulders strain the seams of his white uniform shirt. It’s not a particularly easy task for him, in all honesty. “Would you care for a sample?” Henry asks, as if Alex has ever said no to him. “I’d love one,” Alex tells him instead of saying I’d like to sample you. (Or, Henry sells cheese and Alex is somehow his best customer. It's not really about the cheese.)

take me out and take me home by coffeecatsme

“Shh.” Alex presses a finger over Henry’s lips. Their corners twitch, as if Henry’s desperately fighting a smile. “This is our house, baby. We gotta make it our own." Soon after Ellen's election, Henry and Alex move into a brownstone in New York. This is a story of how they make it home.

i still love you more than i should say by tkstrand

It’s been three months since Alex started working for Bankston & Shrivastava Associates, and he’s starting to think that his tiny crush on his coworker may not actually be that small. NYU School of Law may have helped him pass the bar, but it certainly didn’t prepare him for everything that is Henry fucking Fox. What makes it worse, though, is that Alex can’t do a fucking thing about it. No matter how much banter they swap, how many times he makes Henry blush in a day, it doesn’t matter. Alex can’t do anything, because Henry already has a boyfriend. Or, where a slight miscommunication leads Alex to believe that David is Henry's boyfriend.

and that's the way i loved you by HypnosTheory

Alex sighs, tilting his head back and sinking low in his chair. “What if I scare him off? He’s got a pretty big thing about commitment-” “He eats the same thing for breakfast and he wears a ring with his own initials every day,” Nora says, lifting her head up just enough to glare at Alex. “He doesn’t have commitment issues, he’s just a slut. Tell him you want him to be your slut. For the love of all that is holy.” -- Alex accidentally fell hopelessly in love with his roommate and fuck buddy Henry. He tries to plan the perfect confession, but when have any of Alex’s plots worked perfectly?

Baby, You're Gonna Lose Your Own Game by affectionatelyrs

Alex thinks he understands why people get stupid, impulsive tattoos like their ex’s name now if the sudden urge to etch the word darling onto his hip in permanent ink is anything to go by. So, yeah, Alex supposes. Henry may still be maddening, but his mouth? His voice? Maybe it was always hot, actually, and the irritation he previously felt was just thinly veiled complete and utter attraction. That would check out. Hate has always been a multifaceted word, after all. - Or, Alex decides that he wants to fuck the British out of Henry while watching him speak at a gala

flatline by rizcriz

Alex gets the call at 7:57am. It’s from an unknown number, so he answers it with an accent on his tongue and laughter in his throat, ready to troll the scammer for all they’re worth. But the voice on the other side of the line is serious, solemn, when she asks, “Is this, I apologize, all I’ve been given are initials, AGCD?” He frowns, turning away from the coffee shop he’d been about to enter. “Who’s asking?” There’s a moment of hesitation on the other end. “There’s been an incident. On the individual's phone, there’s a sticker. It says, if found, return to AGCD, alongside this phone number. Does it sound familiar?” Alex freezes in the middle of the sidewalk. “What kind of incident?” -- Or, Henry's been in an accident.

craigslist cutie (please don't go) by matherine

Here’s the thing. Alex is simultaneously very, very smart and very, very stupid. Nora calls it the Claremont-Diaz Paradox, and every time she does, June sticks out her tongue like she’s about twelve years old, and then Nora makes a comment about what she would rather June be doing with her tongue, and – okay. Off track. Not relevant to Alex’s current predicament, which is perhaps the most damning example of the Claremont-Diaz Paradox. Alex got himself into NYU Law with flying colors and LSAT scores in the 99th percentile, worked his ass off for three years, and graduated with honors and a crippling caffeine addiction. And then, because he is an idiot, he decided to take his JD, his potential, and his mountain of student loans to his brand-new job as a public defender. Unfortunately, being a public defender pays about as much as working at a Hot Topic. Which means that Alex really needs a roommate. Like, pronto. STAT. ASAP. He’s not sure who’s desperate enough to move into the other room in his beautiful, probably-not-bedbug-infested 700 square feet of Hell’s Kitchen, but he really fucking needs to find somebody. Craigslist is a last resort, but it does bring him Henry.

Professional Rivalry by clottedcreamfudge

"Decided to take the afternoon off to bump into pedestrians?" Alex asks as he gets to his feet, brushing off his chinos and pushing his glasses back onto his face where they've started to slide down his nose. "Shouldn't you be off somewhere writing about men in passionate embraces?" Henry regards him coolly over the armful of papers he's managed to retain complete control of, somehow, and Alex notices vaguely that he's got a smudge of ink just below his jaw. "Shouldn't you be taking a 1L lecture in," Henry pauses, looking at his watch, "less than five minutes?" "Fuck," Alex says again. "Fucking shit." Then he turns around and leaves Henry to bump into more people, probably, since that seems to be his only fucking agenda for the day. *** Professor Alex Claremont-Diaz despises Professor Henry Fox, so naturally they get roomed together at a conference. Alex is fine.

take a step, step again by iphigenias

This is not the first time. The first time, Alex left for class early, left Henry in their bed in Brooklyn with a kiss pressed to the exposed skin behind his ear. He didn’t hear from Henry all day. When he got home that night, Henry wasn’t in the kitchen, or on the sofa watching Bake Off, and he didn’t answer when Alex called. He was still lying in bed, and flinched, when Alex reached out to touch him.

mess me up (no one does it better) by extasiswings

Sometimes, Alex gets stuck in his own head. And for twenty-two years he doesn’t think there’s anything to be done other than to just go with it, ride out the frenetic energy until he’s fixed whatever needs fixing, or until the situation is over, whichever comes first. If he can just control everything, it’s fine. He likes being in control, he’s good at it, he’s fine. It’s just how things have always been. Until Henry.

five times henry's competency turned alex on and one time it turned him into a pile of romantic goo by helenblqckthorn

Alex has a fucking thing for competency. A competency kink, if he wants to be crude. And it just so happens that his boyfriend is one of the most competent men in England. Well, Alex, he thinks. You sure know how to pick ‘em.

Keep Most of Your Heart in London by cresswells

Alex thinks he’s prepared – as prepared as he’ll ever be. He’s been waiting for months to do this. He even did his research on the proper etiquette for a British royal engagement – and then promptly ignored it all. AKA: The one with the engagement of the century.

Red, White & Navy Blue by jedusaur

"Fine," says Alex. He clenches his jaw and his fists. "Great. Watch me. I'll bromance the shit out of the motherfucker."

how we rolled up the carpet (so we could dance) by adhoori

Henry shrugs off his suit jacket and tie, looking his usual annoyingly handsome self while Alex stifles a yawn in spite of the amount of caffeine in his system. “You’re a sight for sore eyes,” Henry says, looking all kinds of fond. Alex feels a little ridiculous in his tousled hair, glasses and the ratty NYU sweatshirt, but finds an answering warmth spreading through him anyway as he lets himself be kissed hello. “Hi, sweetheart,” he says, leaning back into the chair while Henry leans against the desk.

you and me, forevermore by bellamysgriffinprincess

"He pushes up on his toes to kiss Henry, who returns the kiss immediately, greedily, tongue brushing against his in a way that makes Alex's brain short circuit just as much as it did a year ago. A year ago. It still does something to him, stirs something deep inside him that makes his entire body feel like pure mush. It's a memory burned so bright in his mind - cold air, a buzz in his veins, a tree in a quiet garden, fingers gripping his face, soft lips against his. The night his world turned on its axis and shifted toward Henry, altering his path and forever tilting him closer." Or, Alex and Henry on New Year's Eve, one year after their first, and Alex wants it to be special.

All Booked Up by allmylovesatonce

A book tearing up the Bestseller’s List is quickly shoved into Alex’s hands via June and Nora. Despite his resistance, he’s taken in by the book and its whirlwind romance. When Nora insists they all go to a reading with the mysterious author, Alex is drawn in by H. G. Fox, hanging on his every word. When they meet after the signing, it sets him on a path he’d thought was impossible.

Are You Screwing With Me? by railmedaddy

Alex is only downloading Grindr because he’s curious. It doesn’t fucking mean anything, right? And when he answers a call for help from a very hot neighbour – who has no business having a shoulder-to-waist ratio like that – he’s just being friendly. It definitely doesn’t mean that he’s going to discover things about himself that he’d assumed were just passing curiosity. Or, the Grindr meet-cute AU

Yo Te Guiero A Ti by lucy_in_the_sky

“So,” Henry starts again, setting the now empty beer bottle down with a decided thud. “You want to bottom, but are having trouble fingering yourself and making it feel good?” He asks, voice deeper than usual. “Yeah, that’s pretty much it,” Alex shrugs, still feeling half turned on and half mortified. “And you want my help with fingering yourself?” Henry asks, slightly incredulously. And fucking hell, that’s exactly what he wants, even though he technically only asked for Henry’s advice, not his help actually fingering him. “Would you help me?” Alex breathes out, the question barely a whisper.

We were staying in Paris by hollybibble

Henry wakes up with Alex for the first time in Paris. He's desperately in love but still managing to convince himself he is in control...until Alex calls him 'baby.' Cameo appearance by Henry's leather polo gloves.

Piping and Draping on a Saturday Night by cmere

Dear Alex, Please consider this email confirmation that I am available to help supervise students at the End of Semester Dance on Saturday, December 19th. Do let me know if there is anything I should prepare in advance. I look forward to working with you. Sincerely,Professor Henry Fox, Ph.DHistory Alex doesn't really understand why boring and pretentious Professor Henry Fox volunteers to help out at his students' events every semester, but he needs all the help he can get, so he's just gonna have to put up with him.

don't be surprised, baby (it's just me) by pissedofsandwich

Henry reflects on his relationship with touch over the years.

love dares you, to change our way of caring about ourselves by kapplebougher

Henry has read it all: fairy-tales of princes and their courters, unsung histories of kings and their secret lovers, and he has read all their happy endings. But he is not a prince in a fairy-tale, and he has always thought his own secret love story was likelier to end in tragedy. Perhaps it’s time that changed. (Or, Henry’s POV the morning after The Great Claremont-Diaz Ambush at Kensington Palace)

I'd Cross Oceans by 14hpgirl19

Dating a prince is hard. Dating a prince when you're the son of the President is even harder. Alex is done with barely seeing Henry. When Henry gets sick while in London, Alex decides to take matters into his own hands. (And if he ends up with a fiance at the end of it, even better.)

watch before it ends by indomitablelove

He should be working on this essay so he can spend more time with Henry this weekend. He really, really should be working on this essay. But. But. Henry is going live on Instagram. --- that's it, that's the fic.

you turned a moment (into forever) by viciouslyqueer

Sharing an apartment with Alex had seemed like a good idea at first. They’re best friends, prices in Brooklyn are absurd, and they had both been in urgent need of residence – it only made sense. Except for the small, tiny, teeny, barely there fact that Henry has been in love with Alex from the first moment he laid eyes on him. And the fact that Alex doesn’t know, and can never find out.

[minggukieology]

Happy FACE era and happy Jikook days to all!

I promise I'll write a few in depth reflections on the latest Jikook interactions and also will address 편지 in another post but I just wanted to get a few things off my chest so I wanted to post this first. (Sorry, this post will mostly include my reflections and no profound analysis so if you're not interested in my ramblings, you can skip this one)

*inserts these pics to catch your attention lol*

I guess I'll start off by this: I did make the conscious decision to lay off the petiness a few months ago though I can't help but think these few days (even weeks) happened for the sake of all the hateful trolls who have been making rounds even on here revelling in the fact both Jimin and Jungkook were mostly off-grid and Kook spotted having a social life, which somehow automatically discounted any possibility of him keeping in touch with/seeing anyone else for some reason.... but anyways... for the sake of keeping my karma clean let's move on.

Being an ARMY with a special fondness for 3J and Jikook I have to say my life is pretty easy, I just lay back and enjoy as their appearances happen and let things unfold without having to get angry or hateful. Mostly because my love for them doesn't hinge upon a never-ending need for validation for what has been a constant for the past 10+ years. And I hope by communicating and trying to explain more closely to you how especially Jimin and Jungkook interact, trying to help you bridge the language gap, I really hope you feel this sense of calmness as well. There is never anything to question, to fuss or argue about. (Not to stray too much off topic, but rest assured I deeply value and appreciate each and one of your replies and messages, despite the fact I am notoriously bad at replying to them 🫣)

Watching Jimin and Jungkook interact always feels like home, like you have been granted an insight into a familiar scene, with people that are so close they can't help but joke around or poke at each other yet at the same time can't hold back on their appreciation and softness for each other. (If you need a visual representation just take any moment Jimin talks about/with Jungkook and automatically gets all giggly and soft and Jungkook's last live where you could see the little goofball laughing at ex. the teasing scenes but at the same time couldn't hold back his starry eyed expression 🥹)

I have to admit though, I myself got proven wrong when I confidently posted about how they are both missing ARMY based on the Weverse interactions and then proceeded watching Jungkook turn on a live barely interacting with the comments (even remarking on the fact he isn't checking them yet people keep writing lol) just to watch over 1hr of Jimin content and admit to have been staying on top of all his promo releases...To then read Jimin's reply in which he left no room for debate. 국민 정말 미안해ㅠㅠㅠ

So what have we learned over the past few days?

Jimin and Jungkook are fine, in fact better than fine, and not seeing them in public proves absolutely jack sh*t (reverting back to a bit of my pettiness here)

Jungkook was involved with the album more than we could have ever imagined. (can't wait to talk more about 편지, I have to say not many songs have ever touched me as much as this one, for various reasons...)

Jungkook visited Jimin's rehearsal (and was really interested in watching him record for a music show too 🥺) and was also for that reason so confidently announcing that something "amazing beyond words" was coming before the teaser for Set me free pt. 2 dropped

As expected Jimin's latest schedules are recording/company-home-eat-sleep and repeat so he has barely any time left and Jungkook misses him a lot :(

Jungkook is as supportive and admiring of his hyung as ever- his words not mine (still a huge Serendipity stan though 🤭)

And once again highlighting: their communication feels very warm, friendly and familiar, there is no sign of them not knowing about each other or being distant

This was all I just had to write down before my head started spinning, I will be back with more of my nerdy language analysis posts, thanks for reading if you decided to! 😊

[ndoandou]

Ikevamp bois playing modern games part 2

Vincent

Vincent is way into.. gartic phone

Qnd perhaps skribble.io

Like way into it

He would sit down 12 hours in front of the computer and guess what HES BEEN PLAYING GARTIC PHONE AND SKRIBBLE.IO IN A LOBBY OF RANDOMS

12 HRS IN HES STILL NOT DONE WITH BOTH GAMES

Hed obv speedrun a drawing in a short period of time and manage to make it look *chefs kiss*

Imagine if skribble.io had a vc feature tho

No no, like imagine if people were actually toxic in this goofy ahh game

They would yell down vincent down the mic telling him to go play with photoshop

Randoms are salty that vincent can draw and portray even the most ridicilous prompts which results him with the highest score always

Not to mention hes really good at guessing even the shittiest drawimgs from other ppl

"Broer how- that persons drawing looks ridicilous, even arthur's dog could draw that"

"Don't be mean theo! I could guess the drawing from the emotional connection i felt from it"

Jean

Jean has a shitty brick nokia phone

And he really loves playing snake II

No im serious

Well i suppose momte doesnt trust him with any other phones than that

the last time he was given a smartphone he downloaded some hack and slash game

took the word slash literally and then proceeded to cut the phone into two

comte was too stunned to speak

momte didn’t want his kids to miss out on gadgets but he cant have jean destroying his smartphone

BINGO! a nokia 3310 it is! 

jean didnt know how to react at first, but he found it easier to navigate and thats when he found out baout snake II

found it a bit pointless at first but despite saying that, he doesnt realize that thats the only thing he does besids fencing

snake II is his pre workout

the only thing he will be doing before his fencing practice

before meals

and before bed

‘‘jean are you sure you haven’t had enough of snake II..?’‘ comte asked causiously as he never know how his son Jean would react

jean looked at comte and stayed silent for a hot minute

‘‘no’‘

Napoleon

OK FLASH BACK TO MY E BOY NAPOLEON FANART FROM 2021

its official

He plays league of legends

Napoleon is deffo a jungle/top main

Jungle preferabbly

Bros actually cracked coz hed turn any non meta champs into an absolute beast

I see him being especially good with pantheon jungle

Hed play league with jean tbh

And jean would be a dedicated top

But i dont see jean being the best player..

No, like imagine napoleon defending jean from "top troll" and getting spammed "?" On his lane

Napo would literally go to that persons lane just to steal their minion last hits

If hes feeling extra hed even use pantheons ult to yeet over to that player to ks all the minions on that person's lane 😭

"Jgl troll gg"

Ok napo is actually not toxic and is rly nice to play with

Hed even supp for you if ur learning a new champ

Hes only toxic to people who are toxic to his buddies

Comte

Ill be honest

Comte looks like someone who would download all games from every ad pop up he gets

And im talking about anything gacha related

He does not care whether the game is explicit or not as long as he can collect pretty characters

Is he interested in the gameplay??? Probably not.

"For what reason did you spend $$$$$$ on xxx game???" Leonardo asked as he scrolled through comte's in game billings, cocking an eyebrow

"Hm? Well i simply wanted to collect all of these lovely looking characters."

"Without leveling up your characters?"

"Non"

"Do you understand how to play this game?"

Comte only looked at him with his unwavering smile

"honestly this is the most ridicilous spending ive witness from you, heh" Leo snorted

"Much appreciated, but i dont recal asking for any input, old friend" comte retorted

Leo looked at him and sighed

"Honestly at this point i shouldn't be surprised"

.

.

This took me forever to upload because i coulndn't figure what type of game comte would play then one day i was like AHAAAAA

Also i didn't proof read as always so pls dont chop my head off :"))

[mrs-monaghan]

Someone in the comments asked what did tae do? So here is my answer. I probably forgot other things.

Ever since taennie pictures were leaked, tae has been using jk to hide it, because he knows that tkk is the biggest ship and that army are mostly tkkrs.

So, he keeps starting a couple minutes vlives, just to talk about jk, unprovoked, then turned it off. He keeps commenting and posting about jk more than the other members. He said that he'll go with jk to get his tattoo, then we found out later that jm was the one that went with all of them. He started a vlive in the dark like jk and said that he'll buy candles like him then again turned it so quickly. He responded to tkkrs comments on weverse. He uses his hyung card on jk a lot, like when he asked him to do a joint vlive on insta, and even though jk clearly didn't want to, he couldn't refuse after he kept asking him over and over. He once started a live from jk house when he was about to leave, without taking permission from jk, just so army and his shippers would know that he was with jk. When they went to movie premiere, jk didn't talk about tae at all and his vlive was for hours, but tae woke up the next day, started his couple minute live just to tell army and tkkrs that he and jk went to an after party. He kept the pictures of the after party and didn't post them until weeks later, on a special couple day. He commented that he will go to jk's house and that jk will cook for him, and even if this was a lie and he was just trolling, army and his shippers will still believe it and he knows it. He posted so many pics for festa, but the only one which has any kind of skinship with members, is the one with jk, and it was the last one he posted. He scrolled down weverse until he found a picture of jk and commented on it.

And all this is a one way relationship. jk has been trying harder to debunk tkk after tae started with his antics.

Tkkrs noticed this, that it's only tae who's invested in their ship. They take his words and actions like he's giving them the ok to harass jm, so they drag everyday.

jm's relationship with tae has changed. It's very obvious that he's pulling away. He's also not liking what tae is doing. Tae has been commenting on his posts but jm is not answering back. And tae seems to notice the change. And he keeps commenting about it, he didn't show up for work out, he didn't wait for me at the airport.

Not to forget that Tae is very present in sm, in twitter, tkk is always trending with posts filled with lies. He's the only member who has his mentions opened in insta, and tkkrs keep sending him porn fanart, tkk edits...

So the question is, is it worth it?

There u go guys....

[3collecurei]

Homestucktober 2023 (1-5)

1) Patron Troll

Seer gang rise up ✊🏽 (I'd done two classpect tests since 2012 and both times I was a Seer, my aspect just changed from Void to Doom which isn't a good sign lol...although the one I just tried from 4chan is telling me I'm a Page of Void now...I mean I'll take it because it's an aspect I've gotten before but I'm not really trying to be Jake or Tavros out here they both got so screwed over lol)

Anyway if she were my actual patron in a game session I'd be fucking terrified because of what she puts John and Dave through but also probably laughing my ass off at her antics and impressed by her intense sensing ability despite the blindness

2) Favorite Beta Kid

Dave Strider is much needed comedic relief in such a tragic tale and his ramblings are often as deeply philosophical as they are deeply ridiculous. I don't even have the right words to describe all this character has done for me. I'm in love with the Time aspect even though it's probably the last aspect I'd be assigned to because I think Time players have to deal with the multiplicity of the self the most out of everyone (except maybe Space players), and what a fucking difficult thing that must be. I will always wonder how he managed to spend IIRC weeks in the game whereas for everyone else it was just 24 hours (and of course Davesprite spending IIRC four months trying to fix his doomed session...my heart)

3) Favorite Beta Troll

(IIRC the beta trolls are technically the dancestors but I just call the original 12 the betas sometimes because they deal with the beta kids and we meet them first. Anyway)

Again I don't have words enough to describe what Karkat has done for me. Karkat rounding up and trying to lead eleven other insane motherfuckers and losing his cool often but almost always asserting, in his way, that it's because he deeply cares. You really see this in Act 6 Post Murderstuck when we find him in Openbound and he's obviously dealing with the weight of having failed at leadership so hard that over half of his teammates are dead. It probably took him a while of raging at how long the meteor trip would be (and upset Sollux didn't stay after "dying" in front of him again) before the sadness set in, but if there's one thing Karkat isn't, it's afraid of emotion. Also the PCG, CCG, FCG conversations remain some of my favorites in the entire canon, especially the one where FCG berates CCG for "wanting [Terezi] in every quadrant like a desperate fool." If there's one thing I can relate to about Karkat it's that I will also always read past me for filth even if it's hard. I use it as a form of self pruning and improvement and eventually I think FCG gets that too.

4) Favorite Alpha Kid

It was Dirk for a long time until maybe the last year or two, but I realized after re-reading the Epilogues that relating to him as much as I do is probably really bad lol, but Roxy was always a close second. Obsessed with the fact that the wild alcoholic, who one might think would be the worst team member because of that, instead sobers up and fully embodies John's role as the "friendleader" which is why I think they end up getting along so well. Despite the obstacles Roxy is full of love for their friends, and with friends like the people who they end up becoming in the Epilogues, you gotta hand it to them for their persistence. Considering that they were in a Void session their positivity throughout was pretty amazing to me, also shout out to them for fully embracing Calliope's skull appearance and finding them beautiful anyway. Alien love wins

5) Favorite Alpha Troll

Okay but can we talk about the fact that she ends up alive??? As a huge stan of hers since we started seeing her I was fucking living my best life lol I can't hate it whatsoever even though it was at John's expense 😭 Meenah's one of the most determined characters in the entire thing fr, she really said "fuck being dead for millions of years after isolating myself on the moon to avoid responsibility, now I want all the responsibility, all of it." Fully meets Karkat again in Candy and is like "lemme reverse what HIC did and use my ancient Queen powers to benefit the mutant," imo an incredible foil to her future self even though they're very much the same troll and speak pretty much exactly the same. Fish puns are hysterical to me most of the time, her unwavering dedication to the shtick 4x as hard as Feferi did it and editing/improving ones she doesn't like in the middle of her sentences 😂 I cosplayed as her at AX 2013 and had a blast, except for that Cronus cosplayer who tried to hit on me in character, I had no idea what to do lmao

[ravenclawhierra]

Making it up... Not well enough!

Sebastian Sallow x Reader

Summary: Part 2 of "It Mattered To Me"

Tags: Fluffier than last part, I promise.

Word count: 1,3k

Ever since he said that he would make it up to you, he has been trying his best to make sure and prove to you that he doesn't hate or dislike you. And you really noticed that, however it was starting to frustrate you. He'd constantly hug you, pull you close and such. It's not that you minded it, but… you hated that it was not more.

You strutted your way to the library, you were about to have a study session with Sebastian and Ominis. You really had to get some help for potions class, seeming how last time you really couldn’t focus. You usually like potions class, the professor always managed to explain everything well. And you now had to study with your friends instead of just learning it in class. Silly you. But oh well, you liked studying with Sebastian and Ominis - And it only gives you more time to spend with them.

“Hello guys,” You said in a quiet voice, hoping to not disturb anyone else in the library. They both looked up at and greeted you, shy smiles on their faces. “Do either of you have water with you, perhaps?”

“Nope, but I do have a bottle with me, if you’d want to fill it up, I could go with you?” Sebastian perked up, asking more so. His eyes sparkled with hope but you politely declined, not wanting him to give you any more hope than he already has. “Well, I’m going anyway because I’m thirsty myself and want to take a sip as soon as possible.” You sighed in defeat, a quiet ‘fine’ escaping your lips.

“There’s a tap for water nearby anyway.” He mentions, picking himself up from the table and getting over to you.

“Couldn’t you just wait then?” This boy was seriously something else.

“No.” He smirks at you, “What if something were to happen in those, I don’t know, 3 minutes of you gone?”

“What would happen to me in 3 minut-” Your words were interrupted, tripping over the stairs, due to your absolutely clumsy nature, while trying to go down. You closed your eyes, waiting for impact but Sebastian had already casted levioso on you, grabbing you and putting you down. “This wouldn’t have happened if you weren’t with me, you know.”

“Sure,” His smugness was practically radiating from him. He patted your head and before you could say anything, swooped you off your feet. 

“What the HELL are you doing Sebastian!?” You yelled at him, confused and flustered. He put his finger on your lips. 

“Look I’m all over breaking the rules but I don’t wanna get kicked out of the library just yet.” 

“Put me down. Now.” 

♡ - ♡ ~ ♡ - ♡ ~ ♡ - ♡ ~ ♡ - ♡ ~ ♡ - ♡ ~ ♡ - ♡

It was getting worse and worse, with him teasing you more than before and despite you constantly being mad at him for his foolish actions, you still liked being so close to him, you just wanted it to be something more, not just platonic. It was making you lose your mind.

You had finally gotten some peace and quiet, and decided to study with Garreth. It would be easier, however he was not of much help, considering most of his potion-making would end in a disaster. 

“See, to brew an invisibility potion, you just add some troll bogeyes and-” The potion just about exploded straight into his face. You laughed, his face was black from the explosion. He coughed and smiled at you.

What in Godricks’ name was happening. Why was she laughing with Garreth? His face was not even funny. Sebastian was staring at you from afar, clearly annoyed at the commotion happening between the two of you. He was certainly funnier than Garreth and would be way better at making you laugh, getting an honest laugh from you at least.

He went over to your and Weasleys’ table, puffing out his chest a little. He was about to make sure you were gonna come with him, in private. I mean, he certainly wasn’t going to watch you have fun with another guy who’s clearly just trying to get to you, use you. 

He cleared his throat, gaining the attention of you two. 

“Excuse me, I’d like to borrow (Y/n),” He glared at Weasley, “If that isn’t an issue.”

“Alright,” Garreth just nodded, “I’ll wait for you here, (Y/n).” 

“Alright,” Garreth just nodded, “I’ll wait for you here, (Y/n).” 

You got to Sebastian and he took your hand, pulling you away from the table and taking you into a room where the two of you could talk in private. He sighed, groggily, looking at you, his glare still not leaving his face. He was annoyed. 

“What’s the matter?” You asked, your voice laced with worry. 

“You do know he’s just using you, right?” He raised his voice slightly, “He’s not good enough for you.”

You snorted, angrily. Who’s he to tell you who’s good for you or not? Seriously, he’s becoming more and more obsessed with ‘keeping an eye on you’ and ‘showing you he cares’. 

“What do you care if I hang out with him? At least he’s helping me!” You had noticed that this was turning into a classical romance drama, cringing to yourself. “It’s not like you're my partner.” You raised his hand at him, giving gestures as if you’re teaching him a lesson. 

He grabbed you by the hand and pulled you closer, making your other hand immediately reach to his chest so you can push him away. You were mad, but flustered. 

“Have I not done enough?” He asked, his tone now changing. It was almost as if he was sad. He half-pouted at you, honestly making you feel bad for raising your voice at him. “What does Weasley have that I don’t?”

What?

“What do you mean?” 

“I thought that you liked me but you keep doing things that make me feel like you don’t.” By the look of his eyes, you weren’t sure if he was being serious or just trying to pull a really bad joke right now. 

“I-” You stopped yourself from saying anything before you could figure out what his intentions were. Nut he had already pulled you closer to him without you even noticing and you felt yourself feeling some butterflies. Your hand was still on his chest, so you pulled it away, now flustered. 

“You?” He perked up, “Tell me you feel the same way I feel about you.”

“I don’t know how you feel about me.”

He sighed, now grabbing your free hand again, pulling you closer. He stared into your eyes, you stared back. His eyes were practically sparkling. He put his other hand on your cheek, and you felt as if he was going to do the same thing he did last time, tilt your head. 

“You do remember what I said, right? Stop me if you don’t like it.”

With that, he leaned in, a small blush on his face, and a big one on yours. Not this again. But…

You felt his soft lips on yours. You felt more butterflies than before. You honestly didn’t know what to do, to return the kiss or to back away. You wanted it, but you were so confused with everything happening lately. He backed away.

“You don’t feel the same way, do you?”

“No, I-” You composed yourself, “I do, I like you, Sebastian. I was just startled.”

He gave you the sweetest smile you have seen yet, even bigger than when the two of you were going to Hogsmeade, bigger than when you told him that you’d help him find a way to heal his sister. 

He was going to say something but you stopped him in his tracks and kissed him back, which he gladly returned.

“So, you’re mine, right?”

“I am.”

[skymagpie]

“Blizzard is currently trying to somewhat mend them“

Correction make worse, the writing has doubled down on orcs, trolls, goblins and Tauren are evil.

The latest book literally talks about how trolls are dumber on a genetic level than trolls.

This is even far worse than the mid 90s and early 2000s Warcraft which already was not great. Also it attracts real world racists if you want to hear.

Oh I know well about the stupid book, it made me so angry as someone who was hoping after 13 years the game would change for the better and also as a Khadgar lover (he would NOT say that, not after WoD and Legion and Dragonflight lol)

When I said that they are trying to somewhat mend it, I feel like I wanted to say they are trying to give these characters more diverse roles instead of just the stereotypes they wrote them in, like make them more three dimensional characters and we get to see them behaving in new ways (like instead of just orcs being warmorgering brutes we see them in roles like scholars, explorers, archeologists, Kirin Tor mages etc).

However that's why I added in the end that it's hard to do because the foundation is built on this racism, so you can't take it out without rewriting the whole worldbuilding. And it's so sad that they are still using the outdated stereotypes about the races like in that book and that it's part of their internal world building/lorebooks they give to these writers.

Also for your last sentence, I was surprised when I shouldn't have been that there are honest to God elf supremacists on Twitter and Reddit that think (white) Blood Elves are the pinnacle of creation along with (white) humans and that trolls are truly 'savage beasts'. Truly the level of derangement I should've expected.

I am sorry this was a very incoherent mess of a reply, but I am not eloquent with words and I have a lot of beef with WoW's racism (and misogyny!) I think that even if they are trying to diversify the cast, the cultural appropriation this is built on will always exist and the racism will always find its way around. I like some old stuff like "The Last Guardian" and its filled with racism to the brim. Sadly this is why I hope WoW fans talk about these things and don't shut down the discussion, in fact I encourage it.