#because obviously these words all have different connotations

[crepes-suzette-373]

Not having "Emotions" 感情 or "Emotions" 情: Germa 66/Vinsmokes

Analysing the 3 Vinsmoke boys, because Oda-sensei should know that things like disgust or anger are also "emotions", and Ichiji/Niji/Yonji all have displayed "emotions". Negative ones, but emotions all the same. So there might be something else going on.

In the raw, there is actually a difference in the exact words that they say the boys don't/shouldn't have. I feel that this is might be important, because that's the way kanji is. The nuance of the word usage can be different depending on the context.

When the Germa scientists say that Sanji should not have "emotions", the word they use is「感情」, which does mean all emotions for the most part (including things like anger, joy, etc).

However, Sora says don't take their "heart" 心 away. When you say someone is heartless, it doesn't mean that they have no "emotions", but they have no "pity" or "compassion".

Reiju also says that what is removed from them is just「情」, not 「感情」. 情 is emotion, but also specifically have the connotation of empathy, sympathy and compassion.

The same word when she says she "still has it" in contrast to the boys:

And lastly, from Sanji himself, calling his brothers "monsters with no blood or tears" 血も涙もない. This idiom means the same as "heartless" or "cold-blooded", meaning no mercy, no sympathy, no pity, no compassion. It does not mean "absolutely zero emotions", unless additional context specifies so.

My conclusion is that either Oda-sensei has been playing word games, or there's a slip-up in translation. The boys seems to actually do have emotions. What they don't have are empathy, sympathy, conscience, and fear. Just look at them casually throwing themselves off the roof, and laughing off their potential deaths.

The reason why they act so cruel might be because they have no innate conscience, so they just parrot and follow whatever Judge told them.

And, since Reiju said she was reprogrammed to always obey, I suspect there's a little bit of that in the other boys too. See Niji, freeze-stopping his kick mid-air because Judge says no:

(the force of it was so strong that Cossette, behind Sanji, was blown away)

What they do to Sanji is really horrible, but little kids brawl and beat up each other all the time. It's the adults who have to teach them "don't do that". Without anyone telling them no, and Judge even permitting it, of course Ichiji and the others act the way that they do.

I think there is the possibility that the boys might still have the ability to feel genuine affection inside them (since, you know, having affection for someone is honestly nothing to do with compassion or mercy). They just might not know what that feeling is, because they've never been taught to understand that.

There's Niji and Yonji being worried when Reiju and Judge were hit:

And the whole "Emotionless Excursion" cover story sideplot.

This is why I say Ichiji and Niji are acting like particularly evil tsundere dumbasses. For all their horrible comments, they're clearly capable of feeling concern. Ichiji less obviously so than Niji, but same difference.

We'll wait and see, I guess, what exactly is the extent of the 情 that is missing from those three.

[naneun-no]

From my drafts so it’s late but:

Today’s delulu thought is that Standing Next to You has too many lyrical coincidences to not be about Jimin.

🫣 I SAID IT WAS DELUSIONAL OKAY

You are free to disagree. You probably should 🤣

I mean we know it wasn’t written by Jung Kook but obviously the version he recorded was arranged with and for JK, and “leave your body golden” can’t be a coincidence right? Like it’s the whole ass album name, plus a word that carries connotations of JK himself, which the ppl who worked with him on Seven must have known.

So if that wasn’t a coincidence… then what about:

1. “How we left and right is something we control” — a callback to both Left and Right by CP feat JK, but also a nod to Butter, a massive BTS hit and a song that he performs alongside his boyfie bestie JM.

2. “When it’s deep like DNA, something they can’t take away” — a callback to another massive BTS hit, interesting. And *delulu warning* also reminds me of JM and JK’s extreme similarities that they themselves have referred to before?? They’re wired the same, they have the same sense of humor, they live and breathe for the same shit and even though they have some very key differences, they really do seem like twin flames (even if you just see it as platonic). They are similar in ways that seem braided into the fibers of their being. Like, in their DNA 🧬 some may say. *delulu warning #2* I’m also reminded of Jimin’s Letter lyrics: “After all this time has passed will we still be the same? Just like we were when we first met.”

Also, “something they can’t take away” is an interesting turn of phrase… more on that later.

3. Okay the real meaty part:

Screaming I’ll testify that we'll survive the test of time, they can't deny our love. They can't divide us, we'll survive the test of time I promise I'll be right here

[I seriously can’t believe how closeted-couple-coded this song is]

First off, again with the Letter lyrics mirrored here with the “test of time.” Then it’s got all this drama about being ripped apart and how it won’t happen and how they’ll be next to each other no matter what and that they have “something they can’t take away.”

Not only does all that line up with other Letter lyrics, but it is so goddamn dramatic and for what?

Be for real, what straight couple in this day and age would have this much working against them?? The only possible explanations are: 1) within the fantasy world of a song I suppose this could be some sort of Romeo and Juliet/West Side Story motif, and to be fair the music video did have a kind of rival gang/crime family look to it? Sort of? With the men fighting below the stage? Idk. Or it could be 2) the fact that idols do in fact often have to hide even their straight relationships, which is wild to me. But I know it’s a thing, so. I suppose there’s that. JK doesn’t seem the type though honestly. I think he’d be even more open about it than V.

On the other hand, the lyrics seem SO fit for a couple who are a) queer, b) closeted, c) currently in/about to be in a legislatively homophobic military and country (am I saying that right? Lol) and d) internationally famous pop idols in the SAME BAND who are both widely regarded as heterosexual sex symbols and would be shunned by many people in their homeland AND internationally if their queerness were to be revealed, much less if they were truly an item and THAT news broke.

Whew. That was a lot but like… that would be a real example of a relationship that would be VERY threatened by outside forces plotting against them and trying to separate them. Not JK and a hot blonde model, not him and a Korean actress, not basically any other scenario but a queer relationship.

Idk I know he didn’t write it but like ??? What the hell is that theme? I’m dying to get inside the mind of the people who DID write it, because are they or are they jikookers at this point like?!

4. Just for fun I’ll also point out the “leave your body golden like the sun and moon” 😏 like. Okay. At this point the songwriters are watching Jikook compilations, drooling over @slaaverin edits like convince me they’re not. CONVINCE ME.

5. “Deeper than the rain”?! “The pain”?! Alright I’m not even serious at this point but ??? Rainy day fight 🌧️?!?! 🤣🤣

6. “Standing next to you” oh you mean like… for 18 months? In a companion enlistment program? Like that?

Alright alright I’m done but you get my point. What even is this song if not an anthem of jikookery?! It’s more on-the-nose than Letter, more sneaky than Still With You. It wasn’t written by JK but at this point I’m calling that the songwriters are as delulu as me.

Hope y’all are well. If you made it to the end of this thank you for donning your tinfoil hat with me and I hope you at least got a giggle.

✌️

[linberlyy]

HBO recently released a new video with mini-interviews with actors on green/black team. And do you know what conclusion we made? Our greens actors are so afraid to express their opinions and views on the actions of the characters that they begin to laugh them off, albeit in short phrases, and explain what we already know.

Just take a look:

Tom: “Why should Team Green be on the throne and not Team Black? My name is on the lease for the castle." (We know, Tom, how much you get hated, and we understand that this is all you can say in principle at such events).

Fabien: “I think it's more a loyalty thing for Cole. I think it's his loyalty to Alicent. He wants what she wants. I myself… no comments.” (I was already shy at the end, you are our sunshine).

Ewan: “Aemond, he was bullied and wronged as a kid. They carved his eye out. He bounced back. He put a sapphire gemstone in his eye. And yeah, they're gonna get what's coming to them.” (Here Ewan revealed what we've already...sort of...seen? Why do we need a summary of the events of the first season? Even the last encrypted phrase sounded without the connotation we needed, so that, obviously, God forbid, we put him against mailwife Daemon, against whom he is nothing).

Olivia: "We have bigger dragons." (Poor Olivia, she was hated, it seems, more than anyone else. She looks thinner and tighter. I really hope that we are wrong. They didn’t even say the words in using their party, just so as not to cause a storm of negativity, how dare this ungrateful person go against Rhaenyra!)

While the actors of the opposite side can afford to make too eloquent and provocative statements, it is clear that most of the normies will support them and begin to squeal with delight:

Steve: “Team Black should be on the throne instead of Team Green. Team Green are usurpers. Team Black are the rightful heirs. They were named by the King. They're just better looking, generally.” (Even green actors cannot afford to call their characters “legitimate” and make any comments in favor of the opposite side, but here there is just basic cringe. Everything we like).

Eve: “They're the best. And the annoying people are pretty obviously the Greens. They're all just a bunch of knobs, and they need their heads being knocked together." (No comments, right? Everything is clear here).

Harry: “Team Black are decent people. We are more of a functioning family. We do things the right way." (The funny thing is that the whole Dance is the struggle of ONE family. The fact that EVEN the actors divide both groups into TWO different families already says something, and we do not take this into account, as it is about the same persons in the scripts).

Phoebe: “I think we love each other way more. I think we have a family base that is incredible. (Yes, let's also compare who loves whom more).

Bethany: “Team Black are the most fun. We get on the most. They all hate each other. „You have no idea the sacrifices that were made to put you on the throne“. (In the video, after the actress’s words, they accidentally removed Alicent and Aegon from the trailer, obviously, there was a visible emphasis on the fact that there is no love in the green family, and in general they watched without exception, but with their black maniacs, everything is cool with them).

Matt: “My uncle is a challenge I welcome. If he dares face me." No chance. I'm coming for his head. I'm gonna put it on a spike. Me and Rhaenyra, there's a bloodline to us, isn't there? We're the thoroughbreds." (Compare Ewan's lines with his. There is a big difference. Matt has the ability to say things like this to please the surviving fans, while Ewan does not, because all he gets in response is judgment, hate speech and swearing. And the phrase “We're the thoroughbreds” each time comes closer and closer to the name of H*tler with his “pure Aryan blood”, don’t blame me).

Emma: "We have madness on our side. And we have a powerful naval presence. Thanks to the Velaryon fleet." (Ok, do we need to remind you in what right and wrong ways the characters got it? Do the Velaryons themselves even know what the key is? However, Emma’s words carry disgust, like the words of her fellow actors, so she’s just a bun. Thanks for that too).

Does anyone have any other suggestions as to which side we present to get our ass kissed? The answer is obvious.

[blockgamepirate]

Sorry but I can’t resist some nerdery about the names Technoblade and Cyberknife:

Techno and cyber both come from ancient Greek

Blade and knife both come from Old English

Which means that both Technoblade and Cyberknife are a combination of a Greek loanword and a native English word. That alone is already just extremely satisfying to me. (1)

To get a bit more specific, though, let’s first compare the native English words here:

Blade 

is obviously a word that you would primarily associate with an edged weapon because the sharp bit of the weapon is called a blade and by extension, blade can also mean “sword“.

Swords, of course, are associated with warriors and knights and so on.

But lots of things have blades. A hoe has a blade, the propellers of an airplane have blades, etc. (2)

Knife

is a much less versatile word; aside from metaphorical meanings, I’m pretty sure it basically only means a fairly specific type of object.

Knives can be used in many ways, though, it can be a tool or a weapon, and in fact they’re more often used as tools than weapons.

Knives were definitely used by knights but who they’re associated with is more like assassins, murderers, muggers, backstabbers.

So IMO, while these are very closely associated words, the connotations are very different:

Blade makes me think of a warrior; knife, a murderer. I guess both kill people but in very different contexts. Knives are obviously not the ideal weapon for battle, they’re much more suited for situations where you need to conceal your weapon and/or want to stab someone who’s unarmed or not expecting an attack.

Of course it’s just a name, but it does make Cyberknife sound like a guy who’s probably not really a fighter, but who might still be very willing to do some stabbing, as long as his victims can’t fight back. It would fit a sort of aristocratic type of character, if that’s what Techno was going for. Assassinations are a proud courtly tradition.

As for the Greek parts of the names, though...

I guess you could say that techno- is a more general term and could refer to older technology as well as new, while cyber- has very futuristic or hypermodern associations, which does fit with Cyberknife being supposedly a young guy while c!Technoblade is at least implied to be old...

... But here’s the thing, obviously techno and cyber didn’t have the same meanings or the same connotations in like ancient Greece, right, so what did they actually mean originally?

From Etymonline:

techno- 

word-forming element meaning "art, craft, skill," later "technical, technology," from Latinized form of Greek tekhno-, combining form of tekhnē "art, skill, craft in work; method, system, an art, a system or method of making or doing," (...) (3)

cyber-

word-forming element, ultimately from cybernetics (q.v.). (...)

cybernetics (n.)

"theory or study of communication and control," coined 1948 by U.S. mathematician Norbert Wiener (1894-1964), with -ics + Latinized form of Greek kybernetes "steersman" (metaphorically "guide, governor"), from kybernan "to steer or pilot a ship, direct as a pilot," figuratively "to guide, govern," which is of uncertain origin. (...) (4)

So... excuse this simplification, but... you could say that Techno could be translated as “skill“ while Cyber could be translated as “governing“.

This is literally just the fucking argument about power through skill versus power through authority.

You know, the whole discourse about c!Techno being a “tyrant” because he’s too good at fighting?

To be clear, I don’t think this was intentional, AT ALL. But it’s kind of funny. Like literally, the Evil Technoblade is Technoblade if instead of having skills he had authority.

That’s how I’m gonna interpret it anyway lmao

1: Fun fact: cc!Techno was not only a bit of a Greek mythology nerd but apparently also had some Greek ancestry (namely his grandmother). And of course his real name Alexander is also a classic Greek name.

2: Another fun fact: in Old English the word blade (more accurately blæd) actually used to mean “leaf“. People just started using it to describe vaguely leaf-shaped things, such as the sharp bits of knives and swords. Also in Proto-Indo-European it seems to have meant “to thrive, bloom”:

blade (n.)

Old English blæd "a leaf," also "a leaf-like part" (of a spade, oar, etc.), from Proto-Germanic *bladaz (source also of Old Frisian bled "leaf," German Blatt, Old Saxon, Danish, Dutch blad, Old Norse blað), from PIE *bhle-to-, suffixed form (past participle) of root *bhel- (3) "to thrive, bloom."

Extended in Middle English to the broad, flattened bone of the shoulder (c. 1300) and the cutting part of knives and swords (early 14c.).

I feel like this is less relevant but I find it interesting anyway.

Knife pretty much just means “knife”, there’s no known earlier etymology beyond Proto-Germanic where it also just means “knife”.

3: The fact that the word techno means both “skill“ and “craft“ amuses me, it’s like his name itself means “cracked at the ‘Craft“.

4: I know I kinda focus more on the “control“ and “governor“ connotations in this post, because it feels fitting for this character who seems to have been intended as an authoritarian villain, presumably anyway. (Of course we don’t actually know about the villain part, maybe there was gonna be a wild plot twist.) But of course the base meaning seems to be a much more neutral one: piloting a ship, So you could very easily also interpret it that way. Or take the metaphorical meaning “guide“, which of course has some very positive connotations.

ETA: Yes, the name CyberKnife comes from a radiotherapy device and yes that's probably where Techno got it from and that's the joke. My point wasn't trying to analyse why Techno chose this name because it's pretty obvious it was because it's funny and that's it. That's why I said I didn't think any of this was intentional.

My point is that the etymologies and connotations that I talked about here seem weirdly appropriate and that's fun. Well it's fun to me anyway. Doesn't matter if they're a complete coincidence, which I'm sure they are.

[buskingalbatross]

I've been a part of the phandom since I was fourteen back in 2012, but i've only recently deviated from my lurker ways and started being active in this community on tumblr. which I have been enjoying immensely! I'm super confused about something however, and so i'm making a post about it. please help.

often when I see the word "parasocial" used among the dnp audience, I've noticed that it's used with really negative connotations. Or with the implication that having a parasocial relationship is inherently bad and terrible. today, for instance, I've seen the term parasocial likened directly to "creepy."

I'd like to ask why that is-what has led to the perception of a parasocial relationship in this fandom as one that is intrinsically invasive and creepy. And I'd like also to put forth my own thoughts on why I think it's unhelpful and incorrect that we use this term to be a near synonym for creepy.

first, a definition. I'm turning to Hank Green for this, as he succinctly sums up what a parasocial relationship is in this vlogbrothers video (a recommended watch). He says a parasocial relationship forms "when the parts of your brain that are designed to have a social relationship between you and another person are used to have a relationship with a person who does not know who you are or, sometimes, cannot know who you are... because they're Huckleberry Finn."

At its most basic, a parasocial relationship is a relationship between you and someone fictional or nonfictional who doesn't know who you are. Hank goes on to say, importantly! that parasocial relationships have been happening since the beginning of time. People have been fans of famous or talented people since time immemorial, people have cared for fictional people since the first stories were told among humans.

~ ✌🏻continued below✌🏻 ~

Similarly, in one of his Am I The Hole videos, Phil says that becoming obsessed with things is normal. "People hyperfixate on stuff. It's fine." We all do it.

In many ways, parasocial relationships are as natural as myriad other forms of human bonds. Humans can't help but connect to each other. To other living and even non-living things. Bonding and connecting and forming communities is what we do. And because of that, I think it's a disservice to oneself be ashamed of being in a parasocial relationship, or to use parasocial as a term to serve as a stand in for a disrespectful fan of someone. I think it fosters a sense of guilt where there shouldn't necessarily be any, especially if you as a viewer of Dan and Phil are respecting the boundaries they have set. You are doing something so normal! So human! You are finding support and comfort and empowerment and motivation and creativity and any number of other things from other people.

There is great joy and great good that can come from parasocial relationships. Obviously! Think of Phil's birthday stream, the feelings you experienced when the lights came on in the theater after TATINOF, all the laughs (among other things) Dan and Phil have gotten from our memes and art.

And it's important to consider the other side of this as well. Dan and Phil also have a parasocial relationship with us. It's different, of course, but they do think of us, make decisions because of us, without truly knowing us. At different points in time maybe they know the loudest of us, a few individuals, but for the most part they do not know who we are. They don't know who you are. But they do think about you. They think about what ties us together, our queerness, our beliefs about the world, the internet, our status as socially awkward and or mentally ill nerds etc. They think about how certain videos or projects or merch will be received. All creators are in a relationship with their audience. And it is often a parasocial one.

Basically i find myself exasperated with stumbling over the word 'parasocial' in this fandom. I want to have the information and know the truth and add my own thoughts! Maybe parasocial is used by other people elsewhere on the internet to mean something bad, but my thesis is this: it's not a bad word. It's a descriptor. And it's a normal thing. Those people are wrong. You shouldn't feel bad about being in a parasocial relationship with Dan and Phil! You should call that relationship what it is with pride! And do as much good with it as you can.

conclusion: talk to me about this! What is your perspective, what am I missing? let me know please. would be happy to talk about this with anyone.

(ok what do i do now do i thank you for reading? i don't do this. text post over.)

[shimamitsu]

i've been rotating so many mika and shima thoughts in my head since chapter 55 came out so i might as well share them with the skiptuals. please don't take anything i say as a serious analysis or something i'm just loafing here. ok. i think the transition from shima to mika in the last two chapters wasn't unintentional at all. they (and their own arcs) resemble each other in ways i hadn't thought about until i read the latest chapter. let's start with how both of them have kinda "built" a public persona to navigate social situations. because of their respective past experiences, shima thinks that he's worthless if he isn't playing the role of the "perfect popular friendly guy", and mika's changed everything about herself so she could be accepted by other people. they're both insecure kids who have tried to find value in themselves by acting according to what others expected of them or what made others "like them more". but at the end of the day this is just putting a band aid on a major wound because the problem obviously lies elsewhere.

this "persona", "facade", "mask", "role" or whatever you wanna call it is harming them rather than saving them. it protects them from getting hurt, but by doing so they're keeping people at arm's length and stopping themselves from genuinely connecting with others.

that's why letting people get close to them and see through this front they put up is difficult for them, they've gotten used to wearing these masks after all. take mika's fear of rejection or how she was hesitant to stay with the girls in ch15 as an example, or shima being worried about how the way he's perceived by other people can make them dislike him. i think it's interesting how both nao-chan and mitsumi's reassuring words conveyed the same meaning on both occasions. "everyone here is friends with someone who threw up on the first day of school" means that people that love you won't stop doing it because you act a little weird or because you make mistakes (and vice versa!). "it's cute to be embarrased" is another way of saying that putting yourself out there, being vulnerable or trying new things won't be the death of you, what's more, it's endearing. both scenes are trying to communicate the same thing: don't worry, being yourself won't make people hate you (and if they do, who cares?).

or, alternatively:

and on that topic, i think chapter 46 and chapter 55 play the same role in shima and mika's character arcs, respectively. both of these chapters are turning points for them. even if the connotation is different, both mitsumi and nao-chan deliver lines that should be exhibited forever in the skip to loafer hall of fame. mitsumi tells shima, who's always thought that he had to be like this or that to be valuable, that no matter who he is she'd still like him. nao-chan tells mika, who's always wondered if anyone would ever love her as she is, that she will definitely find someone who does. both these statements are direct, sincere and come from people who care about them. they're not empty words, they're not saying this just to cheer them up. these are facts. these words refute their deepest fears.

even if mika and shima's character arcs are going in different directions (and each of them has their own circumstances), both of them are in the process of internalizing these ideas. i'd say mika's getting closer because she's always been the type of person who's in tune with her feelings, unlike shima. it's clear after the last chapter, like how she opened up to nao-chan and how she was ok with mukai listening. but shima's getting there too, this arc was definitely a decisive moment for him. that's why i'm only pointing out a few similarities i've noticed, they're both doing their own thing. and as i said before, they're not alone in their journeys, the people around them are helping them too. you know how nao-chan said in the last chapter that someday mika "will definitely find someone who will love her, warts and all?" i've said in one of my previous posts that even if nao-chan was referring to a romantic partner, i think that what she said can also apply to any kind of relatioship. that's why i believe it's important to mention that the first character who sees beyond mika's facade is... mitsumi! and well, that's because mitsumi is mitsumi. even though mika wasn't very nice to her at first, mitsumi still goes to her and asks for her help. mitsumi's not telling her "i'm overlooking your bad points because there might be something good underneath it all" or something, we know she's not that kind of person. she's looking directly at mika and telling her "because of the way you treated me i know you can help me". she welcomes mika into her life and into the group, warts and all.

and that's not where it ends. kindness is like a domino effect. once you're shown kindness, you can't help extending kindness to someone else. we can see it in the way mika lends her beret to mitsumi when she feels bad about her bangs. nao-chan comforting mika wouldn't be possible if people like mitsumi or goro weren't kind to her first. yuzu talking to mitsumi that one time at karaoke gave her a little confidence to talk to makoto and befriend her. almost 40 chapters later, makoto goes to yuzu after she finds out what happened with her classmates. shima might not even realize, but him helping mitsumi on their first day of school was literally what started it all. and of course, being kind to yourself will come with time too. kindness is a never-ending cycle. kindness moves us into growing, and that's what sukirofa is all about, really.

peace and loaf on planet earth

[eternal-kosmo-ghoul]

*°:⋆ₓₒ day 7. mirror sex

.｡❅*⋆⍋*∞*｡ “frosted windows”

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ — ❤︎ the fogged windows are perfect places to trace pretty little shapes on, cirrus however has a different shape in mind

pairing: cirrus ghoulette x gn!reader

a/n: i want mommy cirrus to step on me so hard you don’t understand. this one will be shorter than usual

cw: nsfw content. mirror sex. fingering. technically it’s sex against a window but it has a reflection. strap on usage.

▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄

“i think i prefer seeing you all fucked out against the window like this… you just look so damn hot.” —❤︎

┅✦┅

“hehe, look at this little shape i made.”

“awww, that one is cute.”

cirrus just giggled at your antics, finding them endearing. the two of you rented out a log cabin for the season to stay in, just to enjoy the holiday with each other’s company.

the two of you stood in front of one of the many windows in the cabin, which was frosted from the chilling, crystal snow from outside. it was a rather freezing day today, especially because it was getting closer to late december. but of course, you wanted to make do of the lovely frost and have some fun with it.

“see look at this one! it’s a little bunny!” you cheered happily, tracing your fingertip on the glass to create a simple, cartoonish bunny that had such a dorky look on it. the air ghoulette laughed.

“seriously? that’s what you call a bunny?” cirrus laughed sarcastically. she pinched your cheek with a coo, and you just whined.

“heyyy.”

“here, i’ll show you how it’s really done.”

her voice held a certain confidence to it. cirrus used her ghoul tail to make quick swipes across the window, each one creating a thin, swift line that led to the creation of a rather skrunkly looking snow bunny.

you stifled a laugh.

“… hah, you sure that one is better than mine?” you managed to snort out, and cirrus narrows her eyes at you, rolling her eyes playfully. “it looks like a shitty shakespearean disaster.”

“you dare to make fun of my creative intellect? i’ll have you know that i am a very talented artist.” cirrus spoke in an exaggerated, dramatic tone, obviously messing around with you.

you just punched her shoulder playfully, giggling at her sassy attitude. “yeah, only with your fingers.”

she sticks her tongue out at you. “i can’t tell if you meant that as a sexual connotation, or me playing my keyboard.”

“hey you never know! it can be both!”

the two of you giggled, laughing and pushing each other around. it was nice getting to rewind and relax with your partner like this. as much as cirrus was a pain in the ass sometimes, she was genuinely a great girlfriend to you. you both leaned against the window and calmed down from your laughter, wiping away tears of joy.

“ahh.. but honestly.. there are other shapes i’m good at making, ones that don’t involve me making shitty drawings on a frosted window.” cirrus spoke between her chuckles, her voice becoming more calm and soothing.

you giggled, wiping your eyes as you looked at cirrus, growing intrigued by her words. “haha.. elaborate, will ya?”

cirrus smirked, her tail coiling around your calf.

“well, first i’ll have to preface this by saying that it is a two-person job.” cirrus started out, her voice dropping lowly. “y’know, it’s a team effort.”

your breath hitched from this.

“uh-huh…”

“and it’s very hands-on.”

“mhm..”

“y’know, to really create the most beautiful piece of art.”

you sighed at your girlfriend’s attempts to be teasing.

“just say you wanna fuck and i’ll say yes, babe.” you bluntly stated. cirrus’ eyes widened, and you gave her a blank look, but that smirk spoke volumes.

no further words of affirmation were needed.

cirrus shook her head and mirrored your devilishly charming grin. in a blink, she had you pushed up against the frosted, chilling window, her chest pushing up against your back.

“fine then, since you’re so insistent on it.” she chuckled out lustfully, grabbing your chin and forcing your head to turn around.

the two of you started to kiss with a fervent desire to feel each other’s bodies on one another. cirrus’ quick and nimble fingers quickly made do to discard the jeans you were wearing, yanking both your jeans and underwear down until it was sagging off of your knees.

“i’m going to turn you into a fucking work of art, darling.” cirrus moaned into your mouth lustfully. “and you’re going to fucking like it.”

“mmmh.. sure i will honey.” you teased, and cirrus growled, but it was quickly replaced by a promiscuous chuckle.

licking her fingers, she teased and prodded at your aroused hole before pushing them inside of you. you let out a sharp gasp and pushed your face against the hazy up cabin window, your breath fogging up the areas that were clear. despite the haziness on the glass, you could see your reflection, and your blissed out face.

“fuccckk that’s it… relax.” cirrus groaned out, watching your reflection and how you moaned lustfully against the window. the window was bone-chilling, but the difference in temperature only made pleasure shoot between your legs.

cirrus’ fingers continued to make work in that ring of muscle, stretching out your hole, and prepping you for the main event. she was precise with her fingers, she knew exactly what she was doing.

as your moans got louder and more pornographic, cirrus suddenly pulled her fingers out, making you whine from the emptiness. she quickly hushed you by putting the fluffy end of her tail against your lips, effectively shushing you.

“quiet. i’m only getting started.” she said with a tone of authority. cirrus pulled her pants down, to reveal the strap on she’s been hiding this whole time.

you cursed at the sight. “damn, you just had that on you?”

“hell yes i did, i knew i was gonna have to fuck that attitude out of you on this trip.” cirrus groaned. “so you better hold onto that window, baby.”

you obeyed immediately, and held onto whatever surface the window had to offer. without warning, cirrus pushed the strap on completely inside of you, and she relished in the sight of watching you squirm and moan from taking her size.

“ahh!”

“ohhh there we go… look at that slutty hole taking my cock so well.”

it wasn’t long before cirrus started to absolutely wreck your hole, watching you bounce on it and hearing you let out heavenly moans. each moan only created more fog against the window, and the lusting fire in your core only grew more hot.

cirrus was pounding away onto you, her breaths ragged from the quickness of her movements.

she grabbed your chin and forced your head to look at a mirror that was laying on the floor across from you guys. there, you could see how good cirrus was fucking you with her strap, and damn did it only get you going.

“o-ohh yess!” you whimpered out loudly, voice hoarse from all of the screaming and moaning.

cirrus had a satisfied look on your face. she could sense you getting close to your impending orgasm, and she just kept fucking your tight little hole.

“you see that? you see how goddamn sexy you look.” she whispered in an alluring tone, watching how her hips thrusted into your hole from behind and how sexy you looked against the window. your palms, face and body pressed up against the glass.

“i think i prefer seeing you all fucked out against the window like this… you just look so damn hot.”

you could only whine pathetically in response, to drink off of cirrus’ strap to even care about what she had to say.

“c-cum… i need to cum!”

“oh? is that what you want? does this toy want to cum?”

she grinned and pushed you more against the window, her strap digging deeper into your hole, making you cry out in pure euphoria.

“then cum.”

like it was on command, you came with a loud whine. hot, sticky fluids coated your lower regions and dripped on cirrus’ toy. she let out a loud groan and held onto your body tightly as you rode out your orgasm. finally, she pulled you away from the window, and you just leaned against her chest.

“shhh.. i got you.” she spoke lovingly, and you just mewled in response, before looking up at the window.

your body was marked onto the glass. every lustful moment was captured on that glossy window, and it looked damn good. your eyes widened at the sight, and cirrus smirked.

“see? told you i was artistic.”

you definitely need to do this more often.

▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄���▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄

[beansterpie]

ES21 japanese volumes - part 1/??

part 2 >>

Sooooo I recently got my hands on the complete Eyeshield 21 manga series in Japanese and as someone who's only ever read the story through fan-translations on dodgy websites online, I wanted to go through and "live" blog about it, so to speak. I thought it would be interesting to see the changes between the languages and where the fan-translations likely fail with mistranslations. (No shade btw, I think fan-translations are great both as a hobby and the fact that they're doing their work for free, but it's also a reality that the vast majority of fan-translators are amateurs, many of whom don't fluently speak the language they're translating, so there's bound to be mistakes!) Also, I wanna know what they're originally saying because I’m nosey <3

I know the official English translation by VIS is allegedly pretty decent, bar the toning down of some things (like Hiruma's language lol) so if you've had the chance to read the official version, feel free to chime in on differences with the fan-translation that I'll be referencing, or potential differences between the Japanese version too!

And finally, while I am half Japanese and grew up there, tragically my language skills are imperfect. I speak it, but my vocabulary isn't very robust, so I do look up the definitions for a lot of words and kanji, as well as more nuanced connotations or references that may go over my head. Bilingual problems <3 But again, it's good practice for me and I think it'll be kind of fun!

Right off the bat, this page. What it’s saying is essentially, “You better come out and play (in the) American Football match!” But because Japanese syntax is different from English, it’s structured like “American Football Match you better play!!” The translator was confused by the final line, because in Japanese a way to say ‘participating in a match’ is by using 出る which means to ‘go out’— sort of like ‘go out (into) the match’. Maybe a better option would have been ‘get the fuck out and play!!” or just “you better fucking play!!”. It still keeps the overall sentence structure which sounds awkward in English, but at least it gets the meaning across.

(I’m not gonna get into every little mistranslation btw, because that would take forever, but I felt that was a good way to explain how frequently there are little mistakes like this.)

Putting the rest under a cut because I imagine this will get long

Look at our boy <3 So as you know, we start our story with Sena Kobayakawa timidly seeing if he passed his high school entrance exam into Deimon High School, with his childhood friend/older sister figure, Mamori Anezaki lending moral support.

In the third panel, what Sena says is actually “I feel like I’ve been praised for the first time in 10 years—” (maybe they changed it because that was too pathetic 😭) Then in the fourth panel, what Mamori says is more along the lines of “And to think you were a total mess in math and English… It’s all thanks to Mamori-sensei!”

Also I want to point out that Mamori is a little cheekier in the first few chapters. Like obviously still kind and nurturing in personality (her name is literally ‘to protect’), but she teases Sena and feels more like an older sister than like, an overprotective mom lol. Miss that for her 😔

Then along comes our kind senpai to accost our clueless protag...

There’s no mistranslation, but I just wanted to mention that the way Hiruma talks in Japanese is so funny? Like in panel 1, he’s speaking with a dramatic affect, he sounds like some sort of npc in a jrpg giving the protag a quest. And then in panel 2, his ‘of course!’ is this shortened, slang version of the word that sounds almost cute and very modern after the previous line. Hiruma uses a lot of slang in general, though I can’t say if any of it is like, common or used by teenagers (of the time, anyway) or if it’s just Hiruma-isms.

(Look at Kurita doing the sign of the cross in panel 3 😂)

I can’t believe Hiruma managed to physically emulate the experience of contracting some shady internet virus…..

Something that’s done with Hiruma’s dialogue a lot (it’s done w/ other characters too, but most often with Hiruma) is where there’ll be a word/term in kanji that means one thing and pronounced in a certain way, but then the furigana (so the phonetic pronounciation, basically) next to it says something different. Now, in some stories (like Berserk for my pals out there), this is used to create poignant, layered meanings in the text. In ES21 however, it’s mostly used for sports manga flavor. For example, in the above page in Hiruma’s spam fax message, he uses the word 作戦, which means tactics or strategy, and is pronounced: “sa - ku - se - nn” さ-く-せ-ん. But the furigana next to that word reads タクティクス which is quite literally just the English word ‘tactics’ spelled phonetically in Japanese lol (aka a loanword).

He does this A LOT, most frequently with sports terminology, where the kanji are pretty dense, technical terms, and the furigana a loanword version of the same meaning. (though now that I think about it, it might also be because while パワー (power) and スピード (speed) are frequently used and well known loanwords to the average Japanese person, タクティクス (tactics) might be more obscure, so the kanji is there to like, clarify the meaning? 🤔)

Also I love all the early 2000’s tech we see in the early chapters— flip phones and fax machines galore! Even within the later segments of the series, the flip phones start to magically get more advanced, but in my heart ES21 takes place in like, 2003. If they ever do a remake of the anime (which is unlikely to say the least) I’d want them to maintain the early 00’s vibes. It just wouldn’t be the same if everyone had smart phones.

Skipping ahead a few pages, I remember this bit never really made sense, but I got enough of the general gist that I kind of shrugged and moved along. But!! the translation is just making stuff up here?

So for context: it’s Sena’s first day at Deimon, and Mamori (who’s a grade above him) advises him to make proper friends this year, since he has a history of only ‘hanging out’ with shitty bullies who used him as an errand boy.

In the English translation, Sena seems to get a text from a mystery number, telling him to pay up for a bet we never saw happening. He goes to meet up with the texter, who we assume at this point is a previous aquaintence, since he had Sena's number? Maybe one of those bullies that Sena hung out with from middle school? They make Sena go and get them an unspecified thing, but because Sena ran there and back so quickly, they don't believe that Sena actually went, and is lying when he says they were sold out. They drag Sena to a small shed to beat him up, and in the last panel of the third page, Sena says that he's been their errand boy since kindergarden?

So for a number of years I was under the impression that the Ha-ha brothers knew Sena from before the series, even though that never seemed to come up in the rest of the story.

But in the original version, Sena is actually getting a text from Mamori-- which makes sense because it was established earlier that his cell phone is brand new and he only has Mamori's number in his contacts. Mamori's text says: "If someone tries to make you run their errands, tell them 'let's decide by rock-paper-scissors!'" Sena is understandably kind of embarrassed by this, and mutters to himself that he's not a kid anymore.

Then it cuts to Sena being picked on to be an errand boy lmao. Presumably this is because Sena just looks like an easy target to bullies, not because of any previous aquaintence rip. The blond bully tells Sena to go buy them bread (which might sound weird, but Japan has a lot of tasty snack breads that they sell everywhere). In panels 2+3 of the second page, Sena timidly tries to bring up the rock-paper-scissors thing, but is intimidated into giving up and just doing what he's told.

Again, they don't believe that Sena actually went all the way to the school store and back with how quick he was, so they decide to beat him up in the shed. As he's being dragged, Sena says, "It really was sold out! I've gotten used to being an errand boy since kindergarden, so I've just gotten fast--!"

So yeah, if there were any other people who've only read fan-translations and were confused by this bit, there you go.

oh you just know it smelled like ass in here.....

(I never noticed the shotgun propped against the desk on the right before lol, idk why I'm surprised, but Hiruma really just left his Actual Guns lying around huh?)

(2nd pic - Kurita: "New club applicants!!?")

There he is!! Our boy Kurita!! I do miss when he occassionally had like, more human features lol. As much as I love his big ol' smiley face, it does rub me the wrong way when the fat characters (because Komusubi falls into this too) are the only ones with anpanman faces.

(anpanman, for the uninitiated)

(Kurita: "To literally clash with the opponent in order to pursue a goal together with everyone-- that moment is exhilerating!")

Aw look at Sena feeling inspired! Honestly I really love how Kurita is Sena's first friend he makes in the series, and that vibe in the early chapters where it's just Sena, Kurita and Hiruma is so much fun <3

(P1: Kurita: "Way to go Sena!" Imaginary Coach: "It's thanks to you that we could participate in the Christmas Bowl!" Mamori: "You're so cool Sena!"

P2: Mamori: "You have to make the first move!" Sena: "U-um!"

P3: Sena: "Can I... be the team shumu*?" Kurita: "WHAAATT!? O-OF-OF COURSE!")

*Ok soooo I don't fully understand what a shumu is lol, or how you'd translate it to English. The word itself apparently means 'person in charge' so? The fan-translation just calls it the manager, but based on something Hiruma says later, I get the impression that the shumu and the manager are technically different roles? But when Mamori becomes the manager later, she takes on a lot of what are allegedly 'shumu tasks', along with Hiruma, so idk. If anyone's read the official VIS translation, feel free to chime in on how they did it, because I'd be curious to know!

That being said, adorable of Sena to think he could have handled that responsiblity at all 😂 our boy has many talents, but being smart and organized is not among them.

Ok fun feelings are over, it's time for pain.

(Sena looking at his contact list, having just added Kurita's number, then wham D: )

The three bullies from before were waiting to get revenge. The dialogue is a bit different in the original. Juumonji (the blond one) actually says: "That fatso a friend of yours, Sena? Tell me his contact info-- if you do that, we'll let you go." To which Sena timidly and reluctantly agrees. Then Kuroki (the dark haired one) says: "But do you think one bat will be enough? With that brute strength..." In the final panel, Juumonji says: "It's better with just one, since we're gonna call the police beforehand." Togano (with the glasses): "The police?"

Juumonji: "As long as we get him wrapped up in the fight, it'll be fine. We'll say we got these wounds from being assaulted by the fatso with the bat -- We'll get him disqualified from the American Football tournament." One of the others: "Ooohh, smart!"

I guess the overall sentiment isn't that different, but knowing that the initial demand was for Sena to hand over Kurita's contact info with the promise that they would spare him if he obeyed-- and that at first he agreed-- makes his change of heart feel even more significant.

(Sena: "IF YOU'RE GONNA HIT ME, THEN HIT ME!!! I'LL NEVER TELL YOU (Kurita's info)!!!")

Tell 'em Sena!! A part of me sort of wishes the story maintained this serious story beat instead of undercutting it with humor in the next panel (not shown here) but at the same time, ES21 is overall a more lighthearted, comedic story which I love it for, so I don't think I'd like it getting too angsty. I'll always have Berserk in my corner if I want some actual angst lol.

(1st pic: various sounds of surprise or pain, and in the last panel: "Oi, don't let him get away!"

2nd pic: Sena -- "No way!!!" Hiruma: "Hm? Oh it's that guy" )

Lol I do love the little details Murata included, like Kuroki taking a swing at Sena as he's biting Juumonji's hand but then totally missing in the fourth panel because Sena's so fast. Also I'm always on the lookout for the kinds of stuff Hiruma buys, snack wise. We know he loves sugarless gum, obv, and drinks coke based on that one time he bought some for himself, Kurita & Sena, but what else are in those bags? I want to know!!

--------

And lol apparently I'm only allowed 30 images per post rip, so I guess I'll end this here. I guess I can.... reblog and continue? Or I might just make another post for the next part 🤔 Besides this got way too long, so I'll have to be more brief in future posts lol.

I'm honestly not expecting more than like, five people to interact with this lol, but if anyone is interested in specific points of the story they want me to look at, please feel free to ask!

[will80sbyers]

Brett unapologetically believes what he believes. This makes criticizing him less worthwhile to people, cuz if it doesn't affect him, then what's the point?

With Noah, it's clear he's a lot more apologetic about what he believes. We've seen how quickly he backtracks and it's cuz his beliefs were never that strong in the first place. He's a total sponge. He's not confident about his beliefs whatsoever in the same way Brett is because his beliefs largely stem from the beliefs his loved ones have, who he trusts to have good beliefs. This makes tearing him down a lot more entertaining to people that love a good downfall.

I remember after 10/7, there were a few days where Noah did not say anything. So many people were waiting for the ball to drop. I was curious how his Israeli friends were reacting, and low and behold they both had instagram stories that were very obviously directed at him, crying and saying how they were disappointed that someone who they thought cared about them, who has millions of followers, hadn't said anything. And predictably, the next day he started being vocal about it.

And now we just saw how quickly he took down his copypasta after filming started. Im guessing all it took was a few days filming on set among the cast, away from his family and inner circle, for them to talk some sense into him, because he. is. a. sponge!!

It's crazy to think how much appeasing the people around him has probably played a big role in this. And how him now backtracking is only going to make them hate him now too, all the while not even getting the people that hate him already to even consider forgiving him anyways.

I agree with you I think he's VERY easy to suggestion from other people and that's what brought him to say certain things, I feel like propaganda does work and people just undermine that or like to talk about it theoretically but then when they see someone that actually did fall for it or that feels pressured to do things and is clearly influenced they don't take it into consideration and start jumping to the worst possible conclusion that they are heartless monsters etc even when they didn't idk commit direct crimes themselves because of it

I also feel like ignoring that there are LOTS of people that take the meaning of Zionism with a complete different meaning than what we take it as (because of what it is doing in the practical way of expressing that philosophy) is being disingenuous

In the same way that people saying that "from the river to the sea" means that you're saying that you want Jewish people dead is disingenuous

There are two different meanings that people have and not all of them mean that in the sense that they want to kill or keep opressing the other side EVEN if that is born from that, you know people don't mean it in that way, especially people that are not even living in those places themselves, like if you know that - you have to explain to them why that name to you has the same connotation as for example "fascist"

If you think about it, the words fascist and other similar words of political movements are not born with the people giving them inherent negative meaning but that meaning got attached there because of what they did as a movement, which is the same thing that happens with Zionism, but people that are born inside that culture where you get told that that word has a different meaning OBVIOUSLY are not going to tell you that they agree with the negative meaning unless they have been freed from propaganda and can actually see that there can be no distinction anymore because of what they have done... But again we're talking about deprogramming someone, it is just not easy to do!

They will refute that idea because it's a complete shift of the belief system you had since your were born... It's obvious to me that you can't just throw them in a box of "evil" just because they fight to make peace with that idea or refuse it

And online there's a jump from rightly asking for clarification or an apology with accountability when necessary to literally wanting that person dead or in complete misery immediately and never forgiving them or at least letting them live their own life without abuse and harassment

No matter what they actually did or didn't do, like a serial killer is put on the same plane of someone that says a fucked up thing and to me that's kind of insane... I feel like we lost measure (?) idk how to explain this in a better way I just have started feeling like it's all too much online it wouldn't be how you help people to change in the actual real world

And to be clear I'm not against people being called out and having to demonstrate that they did change, (I'm not even a "non violent" person... when needed. Like, I would punch a nazist if I needed to for example) but I feel like now the type of harassment is extreme no matter the "crime"

and instead of it being about helping our world to get better it has become about piling on to pile on and have the most liked post at the same time and these people don't care at all if that person changes or not, they are in the "evil" list now and there they must stay

[cardentist]

Context: [Link] (highly recommend reading even if it’s long) I debated where I should put this, but with the length of this post I want to put @nothorses master post about transandrophobia right at the top [Link] if this post is too lengthy for you or you'd like to read more after chewing on this then I Implore you to open that link and hold onto it.

I don't want to call out this person in particular, I'm certain they don't mean any harm by it and it's not within our best interests to pick fights with people who have (in this commenter's words) Nearly all of the same beliefs with some minor squabbles who are willing to support each other anyways.

but it's exactly Because I'm certain this person means well that frustrates me.

years ago I would've said something along the lines of "this is no different from saying 'I'm not homophobic because I'm not afraid of gay people.'" that it's nitpicking Accurate terminology by breaking it into pieces and judging the words its made up of individually when they're obviously intended to be seen as a whole. trans Men face oppression for being trans Men in a way that cis men do not, just like trans Women face oppression for being trans Women in a way that cis women do not.

but that was a long time ago, the perspective has changed.

"trans men can't have this term because it's too close to affirming cishet white men when they say that they're oppressed for being men" was a talking point back when "transmisandry" was the terminology that was landed on. and while my thought process about that was the same I Understood the kneejerk reaction. because there Was a concerted effort by certain cishet weirdos to make "misandry" a term that made them systematically oppressed by women, and more specifically was used to Deny the existence of misogyny (very ironically from how they acted).

(that said, I have my own reasons for liking that term even if I do see the problems with it, I understand why it was chosen at the time. which I get into here [Link])

"transandrophobia" was coined Specifically to avoid that connotation, to Denounce the association and address that frankly (on the surface) Reasonable kneejerk reaction while still being recognizable and serving the same purpose.

but the talking point about it remained Exactly The Same, completely unchanged despite the change in association. because the point was never About it evoking something unpleasant (though that certainly helped with swaying bystanders in the conversation) it was about the absolute refusal to believe in the concept of people being hated For their manhood. in masculinity intersecting with oppression More than just as a neutral trait.

now, what I'm Not going to say is that the concept of androphobia is a systemic oppression that's upheld by the majority or any governmental body. not mine and certainly not any that I've heard of. but I will Also say that conflating the Recognition of a sentiment that real people express With systemic oppression is not only unhelpful (there's a lot of things that aren't systemic but still matter) but has Also been used to gate keep minorities by exclusionist groups Plenty of times before.

such as when people stopped being able to insist that asexuals don't experience trauma for being asexual At All and instead insisted that it wasn't Systematic and therefore they didn't belong in the queer community. no amount of studies, no amount of personal accounts, no examining of actual law and actual acts of oppression from governing bodies or places of work would sway them. because as long as they could say "It's Not Systemic" they could dismiss it out of hand. when, really, even if they were right it shouldn't matter. if someone experiences trauma they deserve to have the source of that trauma taken seriously no matter the underlying cause. they shouldn't have to Prove that it's important enough to justify caring about.

but to get to my point 9 paragraphs in from where we started, the idea that anti-masculinity or androphobia or anti-man sentiment or Whatever you want to call it Doesn't Exist is pretty ridiculous coming from within the trans community for Several Reasons.

terfs hate trans women because they're transphobic, but they Also hate trans women because they're radfems. a core tenant of radfem ideology Is The Demonization Of Men And Of Masculinity. they think trans women are dangerous Because They See Them As Men Trying To Infiltrate Women's Spaces. and Yes that is obviously transphobia, but the way they talk about trans women is Not magically disconnected from their view of manhood or masculinity or Men As A Group. though Undoubtedly they will side with cis men if it gives them the opportunity to attack trans women, in part because it Is that intersection of Both anti-man sentiments And transphobia And misogyny that has them frothing at the mouth to hate trans women.

(see this: [Link] for a more in depth discussion on radfem ideology as a whole)

and the thing is, someone might be tempted to say "well their hatred of masculinity is Obviously tied to trans women, so there's no point in acknowledging it as anything But transmisogyny." and in fact, that's not a hypothetical at all, it's the default relationship people have with this concept.

but this mindset affects everyone, Especially otherwise marginalized groups.

radfems seeing men as Inherently And Biologically Violent, as rapists and unthinking monsters, Absolutely And Undeniably affects how they treat people of color (Especially black people). white women stalking black men and calling the cops on them because they see their existence as Dangerous has been a Thing for as long as cops have existed (it's the Reason that cops exist) and has been Documented as a current issue in the wake of black lives matter and the murder of black men by the cops. it is an attempt from white women to have black men murdered, to cause violence to them without having to physically implicate themselves, all while using the perception of themselves as inherent victims (small and docile and innocent) with the perception of black men as monsters.

and it Should go without saying, but this Obviously Is Not Saying that black men inherently have it worse than black women. recognizing the oppression of one demographic within an oppressed group Should Not Inherently Mean pitting them against other demographics within that same group. we should just be allowed to point out an experience that some people can have and let that be a neutral (if important) statement. the things black women go through because of Their intersection of racism and misogyny are well and truly Horrific, I certainly don't need to prove that.

and In Fact, black women are victims of that Same intersection of racism and androphobia that we see both from terfs and from white people everywhere. because "womanhood" Almost Without Question means "White womanhood," to have black traits (or to have Non-White traits) is to be closer to masculinity in the eyes of racists.

when terfs post a picture of a cis woman and harass and mock them for Clearly being a trans woman who will Never fool anybody it's universally because the woman in the picture has traits that aren't traditionally upheld as the standard for white women. it's misogyny, it's androphobia, it's transphobia, it's racism. because these ideas Aren't Inherently Separate. they Build on each other and they affect Everybody, because people who think this way don't just turn it on and off like a switch when they're attacking the "intended" target.

and All of these ideas come together and inform the situation with trans men, both on this issue specifically and As A Whole.

just the same as we see that intersection of transphobia and misogyny and androphobia with how trans women are treated (combined, of course, with other relevant aspects of an individual) we see much the same with trans men.

the difference is that people inherently Recognize that what's happening to trans women is more than Just ideas of transphobia (more than Just wanting people to stay the gender that they were assigned at birth), but they recognize Only the misogyny aspect. so when the same conversation is turned onto trans men people don't know what to do with it, Especially when combined with the (unfortunately common) denial that trans men experience Misogyny either.

that complex web of interlocking concepts, and in some cases the Idea Of intersectionality At All, are Denied to trans men. who are then minimized For the perceived lack in complexity (in their oppression, in their identities, and in their lived experiences).

"why not just call it anti-transmasc sentiment then? people might take it more seriously." even Ignoring Everything I've mentioned so far, the Reason I'm not happy with this is because trans men Are attacked (harassed, oppressed, however you want to phrase it) Specifically For Their Identities As Men. and as much as I Also want to establish that behavior and sentiment As stemming from transphobia, I Also don't think we benefit by erasing or softening that idea to make it more palatable to people who don't want to believe it.

this was a response I got to that post I linked at the very top of this essay. I trust that anyone reaching this point has an idea of how silly this is in context, if they haven't read that context themselves. and in fact I wasn't going to acknowledge it at all (I only have this image on hand because I took it to have a laugh with friends). but it's a Convenient and Simple illustration of this exact issue.

the hatred of trans men in trans, queer, and activist spaces is informed and Justified by the hatred of men as a whole. because If you can convince people that trans men are Inherently a privileged group you can justify presenting anything they do as attacking those less privileged than them.

Men are violent, Men shout down women, Men are misogynists, and so a trans man pointing out the existence of his own oppression while actively acknowledging the oppression of nonbinary people and trans women (Only making the point that it's unhelpful to try to quantify this oppression as a tier list and use that to inform how you treat individual people) that trans man is Actually just a Typical Violent Man Exerting His Privilege To Oppress Poor Women.

it's, very ironically, a silencing tactic to avoid addressing the oppression of a minority group to the benefit of the person doing it.

a trans man's manhood is a weapon that is Constantly used against him, and I Might (Might) be willing to call that "anti-trans masc sentiment" if I didn't know where it Stemmed from.

the relationship between radfems and the queer community is, to understate it, Fraught.

for most people who consider themselves to be trans allies, it's Easy to see that terfs are, you know, Bad. to understand that they're a transphobic group and Therefore dangerous. but by-and-large that'd Main and Only thing that that's understood about them.

and to an extent, that's because people believe that that understanding is Enough. that it's Enough to dismiss it out of hand and refuse to look at or Think about what terfs have to say. which is Understandable.

the issue is that no matter how much they Believe that terfs are bad and wrong, they're Still Vulnerable to being influenced by radfem ideology, talking points, and Active Intentional Manipulation if they don't actually know the Details of what it is they believe and how to spot them.

as a Very basic example, people who Believe "terfs are bad because they hate trans people" but Don't understand "radfems are bad because equate men and masculinity as being Inherent Violent and therefore inherently harmful to women" can see something like "men don't belong in women's spaces" and Not Understand that something they may be genuinely trying to consider or understand Is Radfem Rhetoric.

that specific example is, at this point, commonly understood as a terf dog whistle. but it's largely Only understood as a stand in for trans women and called out as transmisogyny.

which is a problem when, say, someone looks at a trans man talking about his experiences is oppression and trauma and says "this Man is shouting down women! this Man is being misogynistic and stealing spaces away from women! this Man doesn't Belong!" and Not Understand That It's The Same Idea. Because the person being targeted Isn't being misgendered (Most of the time), the exact Same silencing and othering tactic is used Effective against trans mascs while not being Recognized as that At All by the majority group.

sometimes these things happen because people passively absorb radfem rhetoric, integrate into their own way of thinking, and then use it against other minority groups without understanding what they're doing. sometimes this is done Very Intentionally by terfs trying to spread their own ideology and break up and cause rifts between groups.

this is not a hypothetical, this is Repeating History that we see over and over again with exclusionists in queer spaces. masterposts at the time had Dedicated Segments talking about the ways these groups shared ideas between each other, between radfems, even when the individuals Don't hate the same people [Link 1, Link 2]

there were Documented Instances of terfs Admitting that they had secret aphobe accounts that they were using to try to indoctrinate ace and aro exclusionists into their beliefs. there's documented instances of terfs admitting that they got to that point By Being indoctrinated through ace and aro exclusionist beliefs and talking points. we had terfs Openly comparing their ideologies to exclusionists Explicitly to recruit them. [Link 1, Link 2, Link 3, Link 4, Link 5]

Because if you're Willing to accept that these ideas Are True, that the Logic that terf ideology is based on is Sound, then you're More Likely to accept when that same logic is pointed at another group. they target people that you're more willing to hate to pull you into their beliefs entirely.

and some people will go on never hating trans people (or never hating trans Women or trans Men or Nonbinary People or Binary Trans People, whatever the particular poison they're drinking), but it doesn't suddenly become Okay when radfem ideology is being used to hurt groups that aren't common sense associated with it.

what's more, these exclusionists groups Hated when you pointed out that connection. would spit and yell and call you bigoted for Daring to make the connection, even when (at it's peak and Most Ridiculous) they were quite literally taking posts originally written by terfs and replacing "trans women" with "ace people." Word For Word. which means it Never got addressed, no matter who pointed it out or how obviously wide spread it was.

and it's Tiring to have to say "if you can't care about how this affects trans men then at Least consider how perpetuating this idea puts trans women in danger" But It's True.

if you let people perpetuate the idea that trans men are Violent, that they're Oppressive, that they don't Deserve to have their own spaces, that they Inherently talk over and erase other oppressed groups by talking about their own issues and asking for compassion, if you Let people say "this group of trans people is Inherently Lesser" Because They Are Men, Because Of Their Closeness To Masculinity, Because Testosterone Or Maleness Is Inherently Corrupting

the jump between Which trans group you think of this way is not as difficult as one would hope. and if we're Never able to address it for what it is, address it As radfem driven androphobia And transphobia And exclusionism then we're going to Keep creating spaces where people are vulnerable to indoctrination. to radfems, to terfs, to exclusionists, to Extremist Reactionary groups of all kinds.

and beyond all of That, as alarming and Important as it may be, it's Also worth noting that radfems (and even Terfs Specifically) Do use androphobia against trans men, even as they force feminine labels on them.

Yes there are the obvious direction that terf oppression of trans men takes. treating them like confused women and trying to indoctrinate and detransition them to Save them or Fix them (which, in itself, is a type of violence). and there's the Resentment of "the frigid uncaring woman trying to identify out of her oppression to instead oppress other women," which isn't a sentiment totally Removed from the issue with how trans mascs can be treated in queer spaces (quite the opposite really, punishing trans men for daring to Be men by equating them with privilege and thus treating them as both an outsider and a threat).

but there Are instances of terfs treating trans men as outright Predatory. as a threat to Them and as a threat to the "poor confused women" that get "manipulated" into "the trans cult" by the trans men they Couldn't indoctrinate.

trans men are vulnerable little girls that are too stupid to know what's good for them and have to be converted Saved, they're the poor lesbians being stolen away from the beds of Deserving radfems women, up until they're Too masculine. until they have beards, until their voices are deep, until they stop wearing makeup, until they're balding or their waste changes or or or-

then they've Mutilated Their Bodies, then they're Frightening, then they're Aggressive and Invasive and Need To Be Dealt With, then they're Ugly Men even as radfems try to deny it.

the feminine trans man is a mark, he's a damsel in distress that radfems want to isolate and indoctrinate. the masculine trans man is Frankenstein's Monster, he's an ugly brutalized image of masculinity, the picture of what radfems hate othered away from what they're a Picture Of by radfems' transphobia. Uncanny and hated just the same.

this isn't "worse" than what terfs do trans women, it's not "better" either, It's The Same, It's The Same.

transphobia, misogyny, and androphobia in a Melting Pot to create a horrific buffet of oppression and abuse. manifesting Differently in different situations and between different people, and yet Fundamentally Connected through the beliefs and ideologies at play.

taking away one of these terms used to Describe this phenomenon doesn't Help, it obfuscates the fact that these things Are connected. which Worsens our ability to Understand them and Address them.

these ideas are Important, not just for trans men but for All Of Us.

and while I'm here, I'd like to address the Other issue I have with proposed alternatives like "anti-trans masc sentiment," Even when proposed in good faith.

if we were to go back and reexamine the terminology for the queer community as a whole and assess if these terms are the most Efficient they possibly could be, would we change them? would we stop using a term like "homophobia" if softening it could make it more palatable? make it easier to introduce the concept to people on the fence? make it easier to ask people to address their own biases without alienating them? if we did away with terms like "internalized homophobia" and instead asked people to address their "complex relationship with gayness" would we be able to get More people to listen?

maybe we could, Maybe softening the term would instead lead to people taking these ideas Less seriously exactly Because it's less direct, Because it's soft, Because it deliberately seeks to Not draw a reaction from a reader. I genuinely couldn't say how this would play out in practice, though we'd probably see both reactions to a degree and thus endless discourse about its effectiveness as a term.

but that's ultimately overshadowed by the Bigger Picture (though, more accurately I could say that it also Informs that bigger picture).

and that's Unity. Cohesion. Communication. Community.

the point of creating terms like this is, of course, in part to give minority groups the vocabulary and perspective necessary to convey their experiences to people outside of said group. and this purpose is endlessly important of course.

but More than that it gives a Community the ability to open a conversation with each other, to take their experiences as Individuals and create a melting pot where they can get a bigger picture of what We As A Group, As A Community, Experience.

this is completely invaluable in every way. it's what allows people to find each other, to know they aren't alone. it allows people to move conversations forward, to unravel complex ideas in a way that Can Acknowledge a vast array of often conflicting and yet Connected experiences. to be able to Build a community together, when lacking a physical space to inhabit, we need Words to connect us. both in passing as neighbors and to Find as Strangers.

when you take a community that already has established terms and you try to popularize an alternative, Especially while encouraging people to Stop using the previous terms, you Split Up that line of communication. people who congregate around one term Won't be in conversation with people who congregate around another, which inhibits the community's ability to grow and deepen.

people who Dislike a term (because it's trying to take something away from them, because they've been told that it's morally reprehensible) Won't engage with it, so posts that are tagged with Only that term will not be found. and even If that term is (unrealistically) universally adopted over time There Will Be A Period where people are simply ignorant of it.

and this is Very Much So used as a weapon by people who Don't want these communities to unify. who Don't want them to talk to each other and Get Ideas. and the smaller, more tentative, less supported a group and term is the more Vulnerable they are to this tactic.

this was and Is used Regularly by exclusionists, though I'm most familiar with how it was used by ace and aro exclusionists Specifically.

they would argue Endlessly about how Anything the ace and aro groups coined for themselves was Bigoted Actually. "aphobe" was attacked by Insisting that it was a term used by autistic people to describe their oppression (a lie, and a ridiculous one at that. there's nothing bigoted about the same term being used for multiple purposes). and "Allo" faced An Endless Barrage of never Ever accepting any term, no alternative, because They Didn't Want Ace People To Be Able To Define The Group That Oppressed Them, because they didn't Believe in that oppression.

Exactly in the same way that transphobes tried to argue that "cis" was really an acronym for something bigoted and so "cis" should be abolished as a term. Exactly in the same way that people argue that "transandrophobia" is offensive Specifically Because they don't believe that trans men are oppressed for being Trans Men.

the point is that they will never accept a replacement term, no matter what. if there Isn't an issue with it (by coincidence or from a certain angle) they will lie to invent one. it's Already Happened with transadrophobia being the intended replacement for transmisandry.

because the Point is double. First to break up the intended target community to hinder conversation around an idea that you don't want to exist, to make it harder and harder for it to be found and (by extension) Understood and expanded upon. and Second to prevent communities from being able to solidify In The First Place.

this wasn't the only tactic that was used to hurt ace and aro people, but it Can't Be Denied that the affect that it had as a whole was devastating. it's been Years since this whole thing started, since it died down even, and the ace and aro communities have yet to recover.

it's Easy to fall into the trap and say "well if we just get the term Right this time then it'll be okay ! if we Fix It then they'll stop!" but it Is exactly a trap. the point of phrasing it like this, of making it about bigotry or about the term being Problematic, is Both intended to demonize the group for having the Audacity to create a term for themselves at All, And to take advantage of well meaning people within the targeted community to do the leg work for them.

it's about silencing, it's about destabilization, it's about Breaking Apart communities so they can't Grow.

"Meet me halfway," they say. you take a step forward, they take a step back. "Meet me halfway," they say.

[becauseimanicequeen]

In Defense of Ji from To Be Continued

(Or “Let’s Look at Characters From a More Non-Binary Perspective”)

I’ve been thinking about writing a post like this since the 5th episode last week (but haven’t gotten around to it). But after reading a couple of comments with the general consensus that Ji’s actions were at the risk of becoming irredeemable, I felt like there was no time like the present. Better late than never, right? (This is a long one, so I’ll put most of it after a break with a TL;DR at the end.)

(Btw, that purple light between them is so well placed. They're clearly not communicating, symbolized by that line being drawn between them. And the purple, a mix of blue (trust and loyalty) and red (love and fate), symbolizes the mysterious and unresolved feelings they're both having (or are beginning to have) towards each other. )

The response to Ji and Achi that I’ve seen has been interesting. The little response I’ve seen (since I haven’t seen this series being talked about that much, or perhaps I’m just bad at searching for it) was utter annoyance with Achi the first few episodes until we were shown that Ji made Achi cry in the past and (mostly) everyone I’ve seen writing about this turned on Ji all of a sudden.

(It’s hilarious to see how easily viewers change their opinions. I mean that genuinely. Some of that is more entertaining than many QLs I’ve watched.)

My mindset isn’t that binary, though. (I don’t see things in either black or white because that’s too limiting for me.) That means that I’m neither for nor against either Achi or Ji. (I can definitely like one character more than another, but that doesn’t mean that character is “better” than any other. And in this particular case, I like Ji and Achi equally.) It just annoys me a bit when a character gets torn to shreds for an isolated scene or situation (akin to the whole Non vs Jin situation in DFF, which got waaaaay out of hand).

(Obviously, this is by no means a call for deep analysis of characters–essay style–every time anyone wants to say something about a character. But I do feel like taking an isolated situation out of context means that the meaning, however differently all of us interpret that meaning, gets lost.)

Based on what we’ve seen so far in To Be Continued, both Achi and Ji have made mistakes (in the past and present), they are both terrible at communicating, both are clearly confused and/or terrified of their feelings (especially towards each other), and it seems like no one wants to be the first to fess up. That’s the general situation of their relationship in the series so far.

A discussion on who’s at “fault” for Ji and Achi’s current situation based on what I just listed is pretty much unnecessary because they’re both equally responsible. However, since it’s so easy to play the blame game and spread it like wildfire on the internet just because there’s a character one doesn’t like or see eye to eye with, I thought it was a good idea to include it in this post anyway. Especially since my answer is based on my non-binary way of thinking. (Spoiler alert: it’s not either/or, it’s both/and.)

(I’m putting fault between quotation marks because I feel like its connotation is too negative when something like responsible would suit better. But since fault is often thrown around when playing the blame game, I’ll stick to that word.)

If we look at Ji and Achi’s actions (the ones we’ve seen so far), I feel like 3 moments stand out:

Achi pestering Ji in the first few episodes even though Ji said he wanted nothing to do with Achi. (Present)

Ji asked Achi to introduce him to Pear. (Past)

The mixed signals both of them are giving each other. (Past and present)

I’ve previously written a post about Achi choosing not to respect Ji’s boundaries (even when clearly stated), so I won’t go too deep into that. What I will mention here, however, is that it doesn’t matter how desperate Achi is in trying to keep Ji close. Breaking someone else’s boundaries is not okay. Whenever someone needs space, it should (ideally) be respected.

Achi is being way too pushy in the first couple of episodes, and he’s not even communicating why that is. I think he says once (or twice?) that he’s missed Ji all these 10 years they’ve been apart and that he wants to know how Ji's been, but that’s no excuse.

If you doubt that some space would make any difference, look at how Ji reacted during that whole montage of Ji finding those bags with food (or whatever it was) that Achi hung on his door in ep. 5. And those notes they write to each other when exchanging those bags is probably the best line of communication they’ve had since they got to know each other. That’s how much can change if a person’s boundaries are respected.

(Sure, you could argue that it was a result of Ji showing respect first when he thanked Achi for coming over with food in the scene before the montage. Sometimes you need to first give what you want to get, and that “thank you” to Achi might've made Achi realize he could back off without being terrified of losing Ji (or whatever his reason for being so persistent is).)

When it comes to my second point above (Ji asking Achi to introduce him to Pear), it’s very interwoven with the third point (the mixed signals both of them are giving).

In the whole montage of them going on that day trip and playing games and stuff in the past (ep. 3), you can clearly see that there are feelings involved from both of them (whatever that may be; friendship, fondness, curiosity, love, whatever). But every time Ji looked at Achi (especially when they were at one of those lookout points with a beautiful view), Achi turned away. I mean, if you look at that whole jacket scene, you can see that he literally steps back and avoids Ji’s gaze.

Ji doesn’t seem to mind though, it’s not like he’s surprised or worried about it. But it still doesn’t change the fact that Achi is giving him mixed signals. Achi is both hot (giving Ji his jacket when Ji’s cold) and cold (stepping away and avoiding Ji’s gaze when Ji is looking and smiling at him).

And then there’s the scene on the pier/jetty at the end of episode 4 (which is also from the past). This happens after Ji asked Achi to introduce him to Pear (which I still believe was very innocent at first because Ji seemed genuinely interested in her, and there’s nothing wrong with that).

On that pier/jetty, Ji is tentatively trying to figure out how Achi is feeling because he can sense the tension (at least that’s how I interpret it). Ji does so by first asking Achi if he has feelings for Pear (because that could be a logical explanation for the tension), but Achi says he doesn’t. That’s when Ji has this look on his face:

It’s like he’s trying to think of another reason for the tension, which I think is what leads to the moment when he says that Achi’s got pretty eyes, nose, and lips.

I feel like he’s being genuine here. At the same time as he’s trying to figure out what the tension is all about, he’s also giving Achi an opportunity to clear things up, to be honest with Ji, and for both of them to get closer.

Then Ji lays his head on Achi’s chest as if to listen to his heartbeat (perhaps listening for an answer rather than being told, because we already know that their m.o. isn’t communication).

Achi is swayed for a moment, but he still chooses to change the subject and ends up leaving the pier/jetty (once again giving Ji mixed signals, especially after looking at Ji with heart eyes only moments before).

Achi’s reaction is probably based on a fear of being rejected since he thinks that Ji is interested in Pear, so it makes sense. But, even though his actions make sense, he’s still choosing to participate in giving off mixed signals.

(I mean, if someone looked at me with hearts in their eyes and then avoided me like the plague when I wanted to get closer, I would ditch the bitch. But, this isn’t about me…)

What’s interesting (and something I think some viewers are forgetting) is that this scene from the past is mirrored in the scene in Ji’s bedroom earlier in the same episode (which is in the present). In the present, it’s Achi who says that he thinks Ji’s eyes, nose, and lips are pretty (confessing to Ji only when he thinks Ji is sleeping, which seems to be his m.o., btw).

But then he repeats it when Ji asks him what he said.

I feel like Achi is trying to bring back that moment from the past because he knows he missed an opportunity to be honest about his feelings at that moment on the pier/jetty. The difference is that this time it leads to them kissing (a kiss that should never have happened until they had cleared up their shit, btw, but who can stop these two confused, love-sick, adorable idiots? Well, the screenwriters can, but what would be the fun in that? I digress…).

This time, Ji is the one who breaks the moment. He knows just as well as Achi where those words came from. He remembers that moment on the pier/jetty in the past just as well as Achi. And I swear that he remembers the rejection too.

It’s possible those memories were too much for Ji. It’s also possible that he realized the kiss wasn’t a good idea (he has shown previously that he’s not okay with Achi just kissing him, like in ep. 2). And as we saw with the previous kiss, it takes Ji a moment or two before he realizes what happens an/or realizes the implications of what’s happening (it took him a moment before he pushed Achi away in ep. 2, and the same here in ep. 4 before he pulled back).

So, who’s at “fault” here? Who’s at “fault” for creating more tension (and hurt feelings) between them?

Is Achi at “fault” considering he brought up the past when mirroring that moment on the pier/jetty? Is he at “fault” considering he initiated the kiss in Ji's bedroom (he was the one who leaned forward first and the one who held onto Ji with both hands/arms)?

Is Ji at “fault” considering he rejected Achi? Is he at “fault” considering he told Achi to leave his bedroom after the kiss (clearly needing some space)?

And don’t come at me with the whole “but Ji hurt Achi’s feelings by hitting on Pear, not to mention taking her to the same movie that Achi took Ji to.”

First of all, was that a conscious choice of Ji’s? Possibly. Was this the best way to go about it? Debatable. But it should be said that Ji got interested in Pear before he started sensing the tension between him and Achi. It was all good feelings before that (and it could be that Ji didn’t think his relationship with Achi was beyond friendship, because delusion and confusion are every teenager’s middle names).

Secondly, on that same pier/jetty in that same scene in ep. 4, Ji mentions that he doesn’t like romantic movies, whereas Achi says that it might be because he’s never been in love. Is it then so far-fetched that he takes Pear to that same movie (which I assume is a romance) to test out if he sees the movie with new eyes now that he’s with Pear? Not really.

(Could he have chosen another romantic movie? Sure. Was there another romance playing at the time? I have no fucking idea because this is fiction and they didn’t tell us and we’re probably supposed to read between the lines that it was a romance and that Ji was influenced by Achi’s words and I’m totally getting off track here…)

Thirdly, and probably the most important point: Let’s not forget that there’s actually a possibility that Ji is bi (the same goes for Achi who had some sort of relationship with… what’s her name, Mona?).

I know it’s difficult in this generally binary-thinking world to understand there’s a possibility of something in the middle of black or white. You’re either gay or straight, right? Wrong! There’s such a thing as bi- and pansexuality. And since we’re living in such a binary-thinking world, it’s easy to be hella confused as bi- or pansexual.

(I won’t go into the bi-hate that viewers spew out in comments and reactions to QLs, especially when the lead roles are bi (and especially when they are together with or hook up with the opposite sex), but it’s so fucking annoying. I want to write a post about this one day, or reblog someone else's post who might’ve written about it better than I ever will, so if anyone knows a post on this, send it my way.)

If Ji is a bi character, can you blame him for being confused? If he’s not bi but is having his gay awakening, can you blame him for being confused?

Can you blame him for asking Achi to introduce him to Pear, especially since Achi has never expressed his romantic interest in Ji and Ji seems genuinely interested in Pear? Can you really blame Ji for trying to figure out what the fuck is going on with Achi when he notices the tension between them?

Can you really blame Ji for not being able to read between the lines (has anyone forgotten he’s a teenager?)?

And I’m not saying all this to say that it’s Achi’s “fault” either. He’s just as confused as Ji. And none of them are brave enough to take the first step to clear things up either.

Again, it’s both Ji and Achi’s “fault” that things are the way they are. They are both responsible for their situation.

There’s still much to be revealed in this series, so a lot of it is still up for speculation right now. Clearly, however, something happened that made them go their separate ways and be out of contact with each other for 10 years.

If I were to put my money on a bet, it would be that they split because of a misunderstanding on both their parts. What that misunderstanding is, though, remains to be seen.

(If I were to guess I think they hooked up, Ji was confused and needed some space to process, and Achi took it as a rejection and left the country (since we’ve seen that his mother lives in the US). But I'm probably wrong.)

Ji's actions, so far, are not irredeemable (he’s not even on the verge of being irredeemable). And if they were, Achi’s actions would be just as irredeemable.

It’s easy to play the blame game, especially in today’s world. It’s a lot more difficult to be open-minded. But the latter will always be more rewarding.

TL;DR: Both Achi and Ji have made mistakes, they are both terrible at communicating, and both are clearly confused and/or terrified of their feelings. No one is at “fault” for their current situation because they’re both responsible for it.

*stepping down from my soapbox*

[opalspring]

Some observations about the gay Kazui theory

A lot of people have been discussing this and it’s super interesting so I wanted to share some stuff I noticed too! Posting this before cat since it’s possible this theory will get either debunked or confirmed by then.

Lyrics from Cat

First, let’s talk about the preview of cat from the 2nd trial song previews. One thing I personally dislike from the staff’s English translation is this part:

“Devotion-love, lame, cheating”

While the first two tl choices are good imo, the third part could have been chosen better. The reason for this being, while it’s not a wrong tl per say, 化かす (bakasu) means “to confuse”, “to delude” according to my dictionary. There’s also the expression 狐と狸の化かし合い (kitsune to tanuki no bakashiai), which refers to two people outfoxing each other. 

While I get this might be for localization purposes, I feel like the word “cheating” has connotations in English that are way too different from the original in this case. What I’m trying to say is that we should probably wait for the mv itself to draw our conclusions regarding this (though it’s also possible this really is just about cheating).

These lines caught my attention too, but for another reason:

“Love + Fate = Crap”

“Disgusting playing-house + Disguise + Fake”

While at first glance, these lyrics make it look like Kazui might be a cheater (and not shy about it), I feel like this could be a case of Kazui lashing out after he spent so much time in a relationship with a woman when he’s not attracted to them in the first place. It’s possible Kazui actually saw his wife in a best friend kind of way, and that they only got married because of their families’ and society’s pressure, compulsory heterosexuality, you know. There Are a lot of suspicious things about Kazui that he needs to explain, but maybe cheating isn’t actually one of them. We’ll see, though.

Next, let’s discuss some things from the half mv. 

How Shidou and Kazui respectively visualize their partner

This next section will reference Triage, where we have a look at Shidou’s family for the first time. As a quick note, there has been some debate over the woman in the mv potentially being Shidou's sister or other family relative but I personally believe she's his lover because of this part:

Shidou (we recognize him as he has the same outfit as in the rest of the mv) has his arm around her waist so I assumed they’re romantically involved because of it.

But how does this all connect to Kazui? You guessed it, the way Shidou and Kazui visualize their partner in their respective mvs vastly differs. Let’s have a look. 

Shidou’s visual representation of his lover.

And here’s Kazui’s.

Notice anything? In my opinion, these choices were very deliberate. As various people in the fandom have pointed out, characters in mil mvs who have faces are very important to whichever story is being told (Rei in Muu’s mvs, Shidou’s lover mentioned earlier etc). So it can make one wonder, why does Kazui’s wife, who he obviously cares deeply for, not have a detailed face when we see her? 

To continue this particular point, I want you to look at these consecutive shots from half:

It’s unclear who the blonde woman on the top is, she could be someone Kazui met at the bar, or a coworker etc. It’s not really important who she is for our theory, what’s to note is that these two shots come one after the other, and that the composition in both is extremely similar. My interpretation for this is that, between a woman who is in the grand scheme of things a stranger to him, and the woman he married, Kazui makes almost no difference in the way he visualizes them (as in facial detail).  Because ultimately, if he’s gay, no matter how hard he tries, no matter the woman, he won’t be able to love them romantically. This could be what the staff was going for here.

The green apple and the pixelated person

There’s a cool detail about the two shots above. To start off, the first one’s composition is a little curious. It follows the rule of 1/3; 2/3 with Kazui in the third third of the screen, but the remaining part of the image feels strangely empty, save for the green light at the top. 

It could represent Kazui’s solitude in the theater, but a few scenes later we get the second shot, where we see the green apple on one of the seats.

A fun fact is that, if you count the seats between Kazui and the apple, you notice that 4 seats on Kazui’s right seats the apple… Which corresponds to the second leftmost seat in the first screenshot. The apple was with him the whole time, and the green light stands right in the middle of the two. Hmm. But what does this mean? Honestly I’m not sure. If anything it means the apple is so important to Kazui it was given this special place. 

But then there’s also the pixelated person in the back of the second screenshot. Who are they? They’re probably very important to the story, especially when the apple stands right between them and Kazui.

Since the mystery person isn’t in the first shot where we’re introduced to Kazui, it could mean that whoever they are/represent, Kazui would rather not acknowledge them. At least not until he has to.

Look at the lyrics that play when this scene is on screen. 

“Where did I go wrong, probably from the beginning”

And then, during the same sentence, we get this Kazui who looks like he just had a revelation.

This sentence probably refers to the fact Kazui’s relationship with his wife was bound to fail, because of his sexual orientation. And the mystery person might be a representation of men in general, who Kazui could be attracted to.

The chair and what it could represent

At certain parts during half, it seems as if Kazui is talking to this chair. Some examples:

It should be noted that both times Kazui does this, the lyrics he sings are the same. This part in particular caught my eye:

“Please tell me what I should do”

Who exactly is Kazui talking to here? He could simply be thinking of his wife here, but since there’s so much emphasis on the chair, I thought they could be symbolic for an entity or a group of people Kazui knows. I have two guesses: it might represent either his family, or maybe society in general. 

I don’t think it’s the former because Kazui seems at odds with them and possibly got disowned, so I feel like he wouldn’t value their opinion too much. As for the second option, it could be Kazui asking us what he should have done/ how he should have handled the situation (with him being gay and unable to love his wife romantically, but not wanting to hurt her feelings). It’s hard to know because we don’t have a lot of context for this part so it could be anything really.

Some parts of the lyrics that could specifically refer to homosexuality

These don’t really fit in any of the other points I talked about but if we look at them in the context of this theory they can be pretty telling:

“So many things I wish I hadn’t known, I’m just a coward”

“What I gave up a long time ago, why is it questioning me now?”

“So many things I should have known, I’m just a coward”

Kazui’s possible coming out to his wife

In my opinion, this part could be the aftermath of Kazui coming out to his wife. Let me explain. Here we have the apple (temptation/the forbidden fruit = the idea of homosexuality here?) in the background, so that’s one thing. Add to that the lyrics playing:

“All this time till now has hurt me, The scales of my heart have decided to sway”

This line could refer to the moment Kazui felt like he had to be honest with his wife, because as much as he loved her, pretending to basically be someone he wasn’t was hurting him. Hence “the scales of his heart swaying”. This scene then led to Hinako jumping from the balcony at some point, but at the moment we don’t know the details.

Hope you enjoyed!

[sophieinwonderland]

A Long Road Ahead And The Usefulness of the Tulpa Label

I try to be a goal-oriented person. As a long-term goal for the community, I believe we need to fight for plural acceptance. But getting there is going to be hard. We will get there, but we have to be strong, we have to be smart, and we have to be united. How quickly we can make this dream a reality will depend on our actions.

Scientific Validation

This is going to be a big point in gaining validation for all plural systems. Not just in syscourse, but from the general public. And the tulpa community is really the only non-spiritual endogenic community being studied today.

There are other very broad studies into "multiplicity" that might include endogenic systems. But these aren't specifically into endogenic systems. If the Stanford tulpa study shows neurological differences from singlet controls, this will be a huge boon for the endogenic community gaining acceptance.

I don't know for certain what the result of that study will be. It could be nothing. But right now, dismantling the narratives around tulpamancy is integral for being able to disseminate these studies and use them as evidence if they do show affirmative evidence. Because anti-endos will try to claim the science itself is offensive as a way of plugging their ears and silencing people. (I've already seen this multiple times when they're presented with studies into tulpamancy.)

And if people believe them, they'll feel uncomfortable sharing the research.

It won't matter what the science shows if nobody is out here actually sharing the science and spreading it around. It would be as good as if there were no studies to begin with.

Visibility

The tulpa community exists in this unique niche. Google "sentient imaginary friend" right now and see what you find.

All of the top results are about tulpamancy. And that's great. So many systems initially come into the tulpa and plural communities by researching imaginary companions, ourselves included. The fact that we've monopolized the concept of the sentient imaginary friend means that the tulpa community can provide a gateway to the larger endogenic and plural communities.

If a divide exists between these communities, it would severely inhibit our ability to introduce new systems to the plural community. "Thoughtform" doesn't have the same connotation. Terms like parogenic and willogenic are only going to be found after you're already searching for system communities. But the problem is that most systems don't because they don't realize that they're systems.

Obviously, the visibility for the individual system is great because it gives them words to describe their experiences and validates their headmates as real.

But it's also great for the plural community as a whole because more plurals means more normalization of plurality. Which brings me to...

Propagation

Like I've talked about before, tulpamancers have spent over a decade cultivating resources. We have the most advanced and detailed guides in the plural community for headmate creation. For prospective systems who want to create headmates, the best resources for them are tulpamancy resources. None of the alternatives offer the resources the tulpa community does, not just for headmate creation but even other plural skills like inner world immersion, imposition, switchingand partial possession.

And like with the visibility, this is not only important for the individual system but also for the community as a whole.

If someone is a prospective system, it's in the plural community's best interest to give them access to the best resources to create headmates. The more efficient the process is and the less questioning they have to do, the more likely it is they stick with the process instead of giving up.

Every prospective system who doesn't make it through headmate creation is one less plural in the world. And the more plurals there are, the more normalized plurality can become in society, and the more power the plural community will have.

Conclusion

I'm not here to tell people that they're wrong for not identifying as tulpas. That's a personal choice. But the community pivoting away from that label is not going strengthen the plural community. It will only weaken us.

Supporting the tulpa community is incredibly important to supporting the endogenic community and plural rights.

This is the strategic choice. This is the best path for the plural community on our road to acceptance.

The anti-endo and "endo-critical" community wants to divide us. They want to take away our power. They want to silence us. And they would love nothing more than for more people to be "pro-thoughtform, anti-tulpa" because they win if we're fighting amongst ourselves. They win by being able to distance endogenic systems from the science that supports us.

And know that this will only last a decade or so until a strong thoughtform community forms, and they have to make up lies to shut that community down too. It's the classic anti-endo move when they're scared.

Don't believe for a moment their promises that any labels you use won't be targeted. It's not like we haven't seen this already with anti-endos recently pretending the word "endogenic" is ableist, and pushing the repeatedly-debunked lies claiming that "system hopping" is stolen from RAMCOA survivors.

[blubberquark]

Language Models and AI Safety: Still Worrying

Previously, I have explained how modern "AI" research has painted itself into a corner, inventing the science fiction rogue AI scenario where a system is smarter than its guardrails, but can easily outwitted by humans.

Two recent examples have confirmed my hunch about AI safety of generative AI. In one well-circulated case, somebody generated a picture of an "ethnically ambiguous Homer Simpson", and in another, somebody created a picture of "baby, female, hispanic".

These incidents show that generative AI still filters prompts and outputs, instead of A) ensuring the correct behaviour during training/fine-tuning, B) manually generating, re-labelling, or pruning the training data, C) directly modifying the learned weights to affect outputs.

In general, it is not surprising that big corporations like Google and Microsoft and non-profits like OpenAI are prioritising racist language or racial composition of characters in generated images over abuse of LLMs or generative art for nefarious purposes, content farms, spam, captcha solving, or impersonation. Somebody with enough criminal energy to use ChatGPT to automatically impersonate your grandma based on your message history after he hacked the phones of tens of thousands of grandmas will be blamed for his acts. Somebody who unintentionally generates a racist picture based on an ambiguous prompt will blame the developers of the software if he's offended. Scammers could have enough money and incentives to run the models on their own machine anyway, where corporations have little recourse.

There is precedent for this. Word2vec, published in 2013, was called a "sexist algorithm" in attention-grabbing headlines, even though the bodies of such articles usually conceded that the word2vec embedding just reproduced patterns inherent in the training data: Obviously word2vec does not have any built-in gender biases, it just departs from the dictionary definitions of words like "doctor" and "nurse" and learns gendered connotations because in the training corpus doctors are more often men, and nurses are more often women. Now even that last explanation is oversimplified. The difference between "man" and "woman" is not quite the same as the difference between "male" and "female", or between "doctor" and "nurse". In the English language, "man" can mean "male person" or "human person", and "nurse" can mean "feeding a baby milk from your breast" or a kind of skilled health care worker who works under the direction and supervision of a licensed physician. Arguably, the word2vec algorithm picked up on properties of the word "nurse" that are part of the meaning of the word (at least one meaning, according tot he dictionary), not properties that are contingent on our sexist world.

I don't want to come down against "political correctness" here. I think it's good if ChatGPT doesn't tell a girl that girls can't be doctors. You have to understand that not accidentally saying something sexist or racist is a big deal, or at least Google, Facebook, Microsoft, and OpenAI all think so. OpenAI are responding to a huge incentive when they add snippets like "ethnically ambiguous" to DALL-E 3 prompts.

If this is so important, why are they re-writing prompts, then? Why are they not doing A, B, or C? Back in the days of word2vec, there was a simple but effective solution to automatically identify gendered components in the learned embedding, and zero out the difference. It's so simple you'll probably kick yourself reading it because you could have published that paper yourself without understanding how word2vec works.

I can only conclude from the behaviour of systems like DALL-E 3 that they are either using simple prompt re-writing (or a more sophisticated approach that behaves just as prompt rewriting would, and performs as badly) because prompt re-writing is the best thing they can come up with. Transformers are complex, and inscrutable. You can't just reach in there, isolate a concept like "human person", and rebalance the composition.

The bitter lesson tells us that big amorphous approaches to AI perform better and scale better than manually written expert systems, ontologies, or description logics. More unsupervised data beats less but carefully labelled data. Even when the developers of these systems have a big incentive not to reproduce a certain pattern from the data, they can't fix such a problem at the root. Their solution is instead to use a simple natural language processing system, a dumb system they can understand, and wrap it around the smart but inscrutable transformer-based language model and image generator.

What does that mean for "sleeper agent AI"? You can't really trust a model that somebody else has trained, but can you even trust a model you have trained, if you haven't carefully reviewed all the input data? Even OpenAI can't trust their own models.

[outofangband]

Having to repost this because there was actually a part of a line I forgot to include that connects things even more strongly so I’m making a new post

Actually I’m not done obsessing about Morwen’s second name, Eledhwen

I’ve spent so many times analyzing the etymology of “Witchwife it is but elf-friend in the new language” but the actual translations of Eledhwen are very interesting too

Eledhwen is a title associated specifically with Morwen. It is described in Tolkien's etymologies as a "sobriquet of Morwen". That it is specifically for one person might explain the discrepancy between the roots and the given meanings. No trace of the words or roots usually meant for sheen, brightness or light appear in Eledhwen though it’s worth noting that the Quenya word for moon, Iþil which means sheen does appear to have phonetic similarities though this might be irrelevant.

The el obviously refers to the Eldar with the prefix Eledh meaning star folk or elven folk

The suffix wen is a feminine suffix but its connotations are specifically related to maidenhood and sometimes beauty.

In The Children of Húrin we get this, “and for the light of her glance and the beauty of her face men called her Eledhwen, the Elvenfair”. Later in the book and in other versions, Eledhwen is more specifically linked to Morwen’s gaze, for example, "The elven light that had long ago earned her name, Eledhwen"

Eledhwen is more specifically translated as Elfsheen in The Silmarillion, "and Morwen, who was named Eledhwen, that is Elfsheen, daughter of Baragund".

I was wondering about when she was first named this and by who. It seems to me that depending on when in her life (pre or post sudden flame, child, adolescent or adult) and by who (her own people, the Hadorians, both independently, etc ) give the name somewhat different connotations

Anyways, it’s fascinating to me that the reasons and associations for Eledhwen are indeed in many ways the same as those that lead to Morwen being called a witch, “Witchwife they called her”, just framed differently

It’s all connected!

“A light still gleaned in them hard to endure; The elven light that had long ago earned her her name”

“He thought that he had looked in the fell eyes of an elf and he was filled with a mortal fear lest some evil overtake him”

( I love Morwen so so much)

Sources: Letters of JRR Tolkien, linguistics indexes of Silmarillion, Lays, and unfinished index

[sureokyeahwhatever]

to assist any fellow dumb people who were PRETTY SURE that the phrase "Sousou no Frieren" was a pun or wordplay or something but you weren't really sure

(arguable spoilers for up to about episode 9 or so)

When the demon guy called her "Frieren the Slayer" and the cool title card dropped that said "FRIEREN THE SLAYER", you probably caught on to the fact that he literally calls her "Sousou no Frieren" (which is what the title card says in Japanese, which is way cooler bc it's a hokey title card drop like 2+ hours into the series and that's hilarious). I read the manga before I started watching the show, so I didn't get the audio cue the first time around.

The official translation of the title is "Beyond Journey's End" which is perfectly fine. This isn't a discussion about "how to translate something and retain all the original meaning" because that's obviously impossible. You probably also have seen that lots of places call it "Frieren at the Funeral" which is probably more literal to the most common usage of "Sousou" (a two kanji word with the respective meanings of "interment" and "to escort/send), which is (more or less) used to mean "see someone off" in a sad funerary sense. It doesn't mean "funeral" literally, since it usually implies the literal act of attendence, it's kind of like the word "exequial" in English in that sense -- it doesn't mean "funeral", it just kind of... implies "funeral" and all of its (usually) sad connotations.

So, we have a few different translations from "Sousou no Frieren", depending on context : "Frieren the Slayer", "Frieren at the Funeral", and I guess if you wanted to really try to wrap those up into one you could say something pretentious like "The Exequial Frieren". There's a cool parallel here with English, where we have two really goofy devices that would very literally fit here -- "funeral-bringer" and "funeral-goer" -- which Japanese has very neatly mashed into one very cool "Sousou".

So yeah. She "sees off" her old adventuring companions at the end of their life, and she also "sees off" the demons that she kills. Frieren the Slayer and Frieren the Funeral Goer as literally "Frieren: the one who sees us off at the end of our lives". Neat!

(source: like 3 Reddit threads and 4 or 5 japanese to English dictionaries. I don't speak a word of this stuff. I just got to that title drop where the guy says "Frieren the Slayer", turned swiftly to my wife and went "wait is that a fucking pun" and wanted to save others from the humiliation of having to go on reddit to figure it out)