#been that mean since so like. i dont want to be harsh but also like. bro u dont have to be so rude to me like ever | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

angelicblondie · 2 months

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high infidelity ೀ⋆⑅˚

luke x princess!reader

cw: cheating (totally not ok in real life pls dont cheat!), sexual content, a tad toxic (MDNI)

luke hated your boyfriend, and you hated luke.

so it was a pretty simple dynamic.

you and luke had never really gotten along. you werent sure why, at first, but it was the way things were - you hated luke, and luke hated you.

it didnt matter, anyways. luke was nice to everyone but you, so you couldn't even talk to anyone about it, because everyone loved him!

it was unfortunate, but it was reality - nothing could be done about your distaste for each other. it is what it is.

you could admit though, that it was highly unhelpful - your rivalry, that is. as being two of the oldest campers, you tended to be paired up quite often. whether it was co-taught classes, demonstrations, cabin duties - somehow, someway, you were always together.

luckily at this point, you two had matured (at least a little) since your arrival at camp half-blood. when the two of you were younger, it was hard to act professional. you would get in fights very often, needing an older camper or even chiron to break it up. it was too easy for the two of you to dissagree - you were just too different from eachother, you were never going to get along.

as you got older, you were able to learn how to bite you tongue, and pick your battles. even if he made a sly comment, or gave you mocking look, you tried your very best (most of the time) not to engage. he wanted a reaction, and you had learned not to give him one (once again, most of the time).

however, recently, its been harder.

a couple months ago, you started dating alex from demeter cabin. he was sweet, and caring, and easy to get along with.

but...also a bit boring.

you wouldnt mention it to anyone of course, not even your closest friends. you tried to convince yourself that boring wasnt bad, in fact, it was what you needed. boring was good for you!

how come it didnt feel like that though?

anyways, the point is, ever since you and alex started dating, luke has been flaring up the teasing again. making little comments, trying to embarrass alex whenever their in the same group of people - it was relentless.

it became harder and harder for you to not get mad at him. he knew just how to get under your skin, better than anyone. why was he bothering you so much? why couldn't you shake him? the hate for him and his stupid comments, and stupid pretty eyes festered deep in your chest, waiting to be released in the form of curses and harsh words you knew you couldn't take back.

you decided not to stoop to his level, though. you figured that was the best form of revenge - no reaction.

but, like stated - he was relentless.

it admittedly got out of hands this morning though, when you had overheard luke talking to his siblings at breakfast. you were simply minding your business, drinking your iced coffee and eating your breakfast as you unintentionally picked up on their conversation.

"...i mean, we all know she's gonna drop him in...what? a week?" you heard the smug, annoying voice of luke and the laugher from his siblings. you paused you actions, discreetly leaning on your elbow to listen closer.

luke laughed before continuing. "not even to be a dick, but that guys is so boring, gods. what does she even see in him?" hermes cabin was called up to the fire, and you seethed in your seat.

that was it. you had taken lukes snide comments and rude words for too long. you felt the anger you had been haboring rise into your throat, and before you know it, you grab your cup, and walked right up to him.

he turned too late, barely registering you were there as your threw your drink right in his face. gasps were heard around the pavilion as confused and speculated murmurs started to circulate.

his mouth was wide open in shock and his eyes were shut as the coffee driped down his face. your voice was stern as you spoke, your lips formed a pout, and your eyebrows were scrunched up. "next time, say it to my face, castellan."

chiron stood up, appalled, calling out both your names. "this is disgraceful! never would i think that two of the brightest and most gifted half-bloods in todays day and age would show such childish behavior!" he lectured, and you look down at the floor, suddenly embarrassed and ashamed. what were you thinking? "the two of you will spend the day cleaning the camp, and i will not hear a single complaint from either of you! understood?"

luke looked like he wanted to argue but he zipped his mouth shut, clenching his jaw tight as he look at you.

supprisingly, he didnt look like his usual mad. instead, he was...amused? he was almost impressed by your boldness - he didnt think you had it in you. but you had bottled it up for so long, it was bound to happen eventually.

you look away from him and up to chiron. you mouth was drawn in a line, and you nodded, almost robotically. "understood." you stated, voice firm. luke did the same and you both walked back to your tables, not giving the other another look. your siblings immidiately bombarded you with questions, so you briefly explain, not really wanting to talk much longer.

you sent an apologetic look to alex as you went to sit back down, and he gave you a strained smile, before looking away. you sigh softly and bite your lip, playing with your food before undeniable hell started - spending the whole day with luke.

.·。.·゜✭·❤·✫·゜·。..·。.·゜✭·❤·✫·゜·。..·。.·゜✭·❤·✫·゜·。..·。.·゜✭·❤

after breakfast, you met luke at the stables, where you started your day of torture. the whole hour it was silent, the only time the two of you spoke was relating to the job.

you were mostly joking before, but truly, if someone had asked you what your personal hell was, this was about as close to it as it could get - cleaning up pegasus manure with only the company of luke castellan.

it totally wasnt fair. your hair kept falling out of your ponytail, pretty much all your polished nails were chipped, and you got shit on your sneakers. and of course, nothing of the sort happened to luke. the sweat on his head didnt look like sweat, it just made him shiny, and if possible, better. his eyes scrunching up in focus only made him look more attractive.

you shook the thought away, reasoning that it was totally ok for you to notice beauty, it was practically your job as a child of aphrodite! as long as you didn't dwell on it too much, you should be good.

but, of course, that wasn't the case.

it became a reoccurring theme to notice how effortless luke was at everything. cleaning the dining pavilion, he looked good. cleaning up after the archery class, he looked good. even sweeping the floor he looked hot! it was totally unfair, and all it did was make you angrier. since when was he allowed to be hot???

as it finally reached the later hours in the day, you two had made it to your last task - picking up trash out of the beach. you sighed, finally breaking the silence.

"ok, are we ever gonna talk, or no?"

luke looks up at you from picking an empty bottel from the sand and smiles mischeviously.

"'bout what?" he teases and you purse your lips.

"seriously?" you ask, hands on your hip and an angry pout. "you know what."

he takes a step closer, looking down at you with amusement. this was funny to him? "nah, princess, think y'need to tell me."

you clench your jaw and cross your arms. "your problem with me. look, im not a fan of you either, but at least im mature enough to try and act civil!" you exclaim.

luke chuckles, stepping away to continue to clean the beach. "yeah, civil. it was real civil when you threw you coffee all over me at breakfast." he quips, voice full of amused sarcasm.

you scoff. "yeah, it was only 'cause you were talking shit, though." you mumble. "sure, it wasnt the best idea, but at least it got the point across."

you move away as well, continuing the task, hoping it would be over soon. "tell me, princess. just outta' pure curiosity, how does your little boyfriend feel 'bout me?" he asks, his voice smug and condecending.

you purse your lips as you turn to me. "ok, seriously, whats your problem?" you drop the trash bag to the sand.

luke shrugs. "no problem, just think you could do better, s'all."

you blink, eyes furrowing in confusion. huh?

its silent for a few moments as you process his words. "you....what?"

luke chuckles, dropping his bag and walking a few steps closer to you. "i think you could do better than whats-his-name. i mean, everyone thinks your only using him for the rite of passage, because why else would you date a guy like that?"

your defensively cross you arms. "like what?"

luke scoffs, as if the answer is obvious. "boring."

you fold your lips inwards. got me there, you think to yourself, and he looks at you like he knows what your thinking.

your narrow your eyes. "hes not boring. and im not using him for the rite of passage. hes nice, he cute, and he doesnt make me want to rip my hair out - all things you cannot say about yourself. besides, its really none of your business."

luke holds up his hands in mock surrender, taking a step back. "woah, dont get all fiery on me, princess. just statin' my opinion, which you asked for," he defends, chuckling at your outburst. "y'know, somethings telling me that your only dating this guys 'cause hes the opposite of me."

your lips twist in a sickeningly sweet smile. "i mean, it certainly doesnt hurt."

luke bite his lip, holding back his amusement and stepping closer. "im startin' to think your obsessed w'me, princess." his voice was lower than before, and his eyes twinkled with michief and...something else?

you swallow, trying to maintain eye contact but the intensity was overwhelming. "i think its the other way around." you say, trying to sound strong, but your voice was quiet.

why all of the sudden was he having this effect on you? why were goosebump trailing up your skin, why was your head foggy, and why on earth did you want him to come closer? not only was it out of character, but it wasn't right! no matter how much you weren't into you boyfriend, you couldn't cheat on him, you knew that was wrong. but luke looked far too good right now, and you were feeling things you never felt before.

before you could come to a conclusion on your emotions, luke took a teasing step back, peeling off his shirt.

"i think im done cleaning," he states, tossing his shirt to the sand and unbuttoning his shorts. you turn to look away, fearing a blush would coat your cheeks at seeing his near-naked form.

you can hear the smirk in lukes voice as he talks, and you turn back to see him just in boxers, walking backwards towards the water.

"gonna take a dip, if you wanna join."

his words were enticing, and you still couldn't figure out why. despite yourself, you slowly peel of you clothes, curious as to where this was going. with a new found sense of confidence, you walk towards the water, locking eyes with luke, who was eyeing your body, and the thin, lacy garments covering you privates.

as you decent down into the water, you stand in front of him, water reaching the middle of your ribcage whilst it almost reaches lukes shoulders, since he's further below. if you were honest, it was quite a beautiful scene, the sun was setting below the horizon, the water was calm and still, and the occasional sound of the waves hitting the shore and crickets beginning to chirp was the only thing that could be heard.

you tilt your head, eyeing him curiously. "why do you hate me, castellan?" you ask, your voice devoid of any malice, just pure curiosity.

luke looked a little suprised by your question, and looked back at you with a bit of amusement. "i dont hate you, princess, thats a bit intense," he chuckles.

you scoff a bit. "well you obviously dont like me. so, what is it?"

you werent sure when it happened, but you and luke had waded out further, making the two of you level, only your shoulders up being visible.

it was silent for a moment as luke thought up his answer, and weirdly the void of conversation was comfortable. the sunset illuminated one side of his face, making him look oddly ethereal. you couldn't look away.

"i dont hate you, princess," he says finally, looking into your eyes with a serious expression (one of the few times you had ever seen one on him).

he doesnt hate you? then why is he always such a dick? you think about asking your plethora of questions, but decide against it, being unable to form any coherent words.

he looked really pretty. you couldn't stop noticing how pretty he was.

for once, your head was devoid of any rational thoughts - you weren't telling yourself how bad of an idea this way, how wrong it is - because it felt so right. and things rarely felt right for you.

you weren't sure who did it first, but somehow your lips met, and it felt like nothing else would ever be the same.

you had been kissed before, but gods, never like this. it was like every emotion you had ever made each other feel was being poured into yours lips, being felt again all at once. your hands were all over each other, trailing below and above surface to claw at the others skin. your lips danced so passionately, everything about it felt raw and exhilarating. and as much as you wished you could say they were, your thoughts weren't on alex, or the consequences of your actions - your head was foggy and consumed by him. by luke.

your tongues clashed every now and then, deepening the kiss and you tried every way to feel closer to him - grabbing his skin, pressing your front flush against his - you needed to feel him everywhere. he wasn't far off from your state, in fact, he was just as bad. he panted into your mouth, his rough, calloused hands from all that training gripping at the skin of your waist, your hips, your ass - anywhere he could find, his hands had been there. you had never felt so deliciously exposed before, and you had never expected to like it.

your legs were wrapped around his waist, and your hands were in his semi-wet hair, gripping and pulling, urging him closer, trying to take control of the kiss. no matter how hard you tried though, you couldn't - luke had full control, and you weren't sure you were mad about that.

you suddenly broke away, the both of you breathless and panting hard, not looking away from each others eyes. your eyes raked over his features, and he looked so perfectly ruined. his hair was a tangled mess , his pupils were engorged, his lips were red, and his cheeks were flushed. you were sure you looked the same, feeling the own heat in your cheeks and thunder in your heart, wondering if he could hear it as well. you couldn't stop thinking about how much you wanted to ruin him all day - do something to make him stop looking so perfect all the time. looking at him now, you decided that it didn't matter, that no matter what you did to rough him up, he would still look angelic.

your lips were still inches apart as you observed each other, catching your breaths. you look back up into his eyes, and let out the only words you could manage.

"take me somewhere else."

.·。.·゜✭·❤·✫·゜·。..·。.·゜✭·❤·✫·゜·。..·。.·゜✭·❤·✫·゜·。..·。.·゜✭·❤

as luke opened the door to an empty cabin one, he quickly pulled you in, caging you against the entrance as he slammed it shut. his lips were instantly back on yours, one hand resting above your head and the other on your bare waist. the kiss was just as soul draining as the other, but a bit more slow and sensual. this one wasn't as desperate - it was like you were exploring each other, trying to figure the other out. your hands trailed down his toned chest and his abs, snaking around to grab his waist to pull him closer. you could feel the water dripping down your skin and onto the floor, and as luke removed his lips to attach onto the skin of your neck, you felt droplets from his raven hair run down your back. you shivered, your senses heightened, feeling hyperaware of every small sounds luke made, of every touch his hands left behind, of every noise you could hear - you could feel it all. it was electric.

lukes left little love bites around you neck and chest, pecking them with a surprising softness after he sucked to hard, almost as if he was apologizing for his roughness. his lips started to trail down past your bra, and his knees began to lower to the floor, his head tilted up to look directly into your eyes. your breath hitched, watching in awe and a sense of impatience as you waited for him to make his next move

kneeled in front of you, lukes hands had slid down from you hips to your waist, his fingers teasingly slipping under the hem of your panties, each time causing you to release a shaky breath. his lips hovered over you clothed core, breathing directly onto your clit as you shivered, throwing you head back against the door.

"please," you ask, your so voice quiet, it was almost a whisper.

you look back down to see lukes response, and the intensity in his gaze made your breaths even more harbored than they already were.

"please?" luke repeated, his voice a low murmur, holding the smallest amount of teasing and mockery, pretending as if he didn't know what you were pleading for.

you nod eagerly. "please, luke. want it," you whine, your voice still quiet, almost as if you were a little ashamed at how easy you had given yourself to him.

luke let out a small, pleased smile. "well, since y'asked so nicely..." he remarks, as his finger loop under the sides of you panties and slide them down to your ankles.

you feel the cold air hit you at the wet bottoms were discarded, and you shivered, sliding them to the side. lukes eyes were no longer on yours, instead, they were on your pussy. it was shocking to see how hunger-filled his eyes were, looking like it took everything in him not to suck you dry, and curb his craving.

he looked back up at you, a small, teasing smile making its way onto his lips as he attached them onto your pussy. you let out a breathy gasp, throwing your head back as your hands instantaneously imbedded themselves into his hair. he threw one of your legs over his shoulder to get a deeper angle, and you could've sworn you saw stars. his lips sucked and licked your clit, inhaling up your juices whilst his fingers moved in and out of you hole, curling up into your sweet spot causing you to arch you back off the door and closer to his mouth. you had some idea that he was good (word got around easily at camp), but you had no idea he was this good, or that head could even be this good.

"luke," you whimpered, feeling yourself getting closer as you gripped his hair, pulling him off your pussy. "stop, s'too much." you voice, your tone needy and breathless.

he himself was breathless, panting hard with your juices dripping down his chin, his hair a tangled mess from your greedy fingers.

"want me t'stop?" he asks, his voice serious as a funeral.

you quickly shook your head. "n-no, no, just..." you bite your lip thinking up something, and your next solution was to pull him back in for a kiss, grabbing him by his shoulders. he seemed a bit surprised, but he certainly wasn't mad, cupping your cheeks as he returned the notion. you started to push him forward, leading him to the nearest bed and he got the memo, backing up against it until he sat down, you moving to straddle his waist.

you continued to kiss, everything about it feeling intoxicating. the feeling of your bare center against his clothed cock sent shockwaves into your core every time you moved against him. luke smirked against your lips, mumbling against them. "not too proud now, huh?" despite yourself, you smile, letting out a small laugh. "shut up," your murmur, pressing your self against him as he lowered his back against the mattress, you laying on top of him.

soon enough, his boxers and your bra were discarded, and luke had you on your back, one hand on your waist and another on his shaft, lining himself up against your entrance.

luckily, he keeps a condom in his pocket (bit of a red flag that he always had one on him, but you guessed it was better safe than sorry) and had slid it on, which you were grateful for. mainly because in your current state, you weren't sure if you would be able to say no if he didn't have one, and you'd let him fuck you raw, which would definitely be bad.

you look down, watching as his tip was right about to enter, and then you hear lukes voice, snapping you out of your trance.

"hey," his firm tone voices, "want you lookin' at me when i fuck you, understand?" he directs, and normally you wouldnt stand for being told what to do, especially by a man, but you were too desperate for him to fuck you, so you nodded eagerly, following his instructions.

when he finaly entered you, your eyes widen, lips opeening in pure euphoria. his own lips parted, leting out a small groan, and a string of curses. "fuck, your tight." he marvels, slowing moving further into you.

once his hips meet yours, he pulls all the way back out, and then back in, pulling a sharp moan out of you lips as your fingers grip the sheets below you.

he continues this process a few times, easing the both of you into adjusting to his sheer mass. eventually, luke begins to speed up, finding a steady and pleasurable pace for the both of you. your walls gripped his dick, and luke would swear he had never felt such pleasure. he could feel each clench, hear every crude squelch, and even still taste your wetness from before on his tongue. he never would've thought he'd be lucky enough to see you in this position, but he assumed he must've won the lottery today or been blessed by one of the gods, because in no world would you letting him do this would be reality.

luke grunted as he looked down to see your connection - your wetness on the silicone, the veins on his dick visible underneath, your pussy swallowing up his inches every time he pushed himself in - it was a sight to see.

he let out a breathy, disbelieving chuckle. "god, princess, what do you think your lil'boyfriend would have to say about this, huh?" he looks back to your face, to see your eyes scrunched up in pleasure and your lips dropped in awe, and it only spurred him on further.

"huh? bet he'd understand. even he knows hes not good enough for you," he chuckles darkly, quickening the pace of his thrust, the sound of your skin slapping together audible. "bet he could never make you feel this good, could he?"

you repeatedly shake your head, your words coming out all jumbled together. "no, never, only you, luke," you cry, moaning out as each thrust brings you closer to your high, your hands moving to scratch against his back, nails digging into his skin as pleasure overcomes you.

he didn't seem to mind the mild pain, in fact, it seemed to spur him on further. "s'that right, princess? only me?" you almost regretted your words, seeing how much it seemed to have grown his ego, but you couldn't find it in yourself to care all that much when he was making you feel so good.

you nod, whimpering as your cunt clenched around him, biting your lip to hold back any more sounds.

luke cursed under his breath, speeding up even more. "fuck, 'mclose, baby."

the use of the new nicknames brings you closer, more and more little whines leaving your lips. "same. please, luke."

"yeah? wanna cum all over my dick? gods, go ahead, babe, you can do it." he spurs you on, watching as your face twists with pleasure and your hips splutter, your eyes locked on his as your run over the edged.

you irises are glazed over with pleasure as you release around him, his hips continuing their assault as he chases his own high. your transfixed by the sight of him, not able to look away once he reaches his own high, releasing a low, guttural groan. he throws his head back as his movements slow, a lazy and satisfied smile taking over his features. you mimic his expression, quite pleased yourself with what just transpired.

"fuck me, princess" he lets out a breathy chuckle, pulling himself out of you as you giggle as well. he pulls of the condom and stands up, placing a surprisingly gentle kiss on your forehead.

you lay flat on the bed, eyes on the ceiling as your process what just happened. you just fucked luke, you worst enemy and...really enjoyed it, to say the least. and you also cheated on your boyfriend. you winced at the thought, deciding to deal with that factor later, and instead, try to figure how you now feel about luke. not surprisingly, your opinions on luke had changed drastically in the last hour. you had gotten to see a different side to him, one you hope you'd get to continue to see. but you were weirdly filled with insecurity, wondering if this was just a one and done for him. and then you were filled with even more confusion, wondering why that thought upset you.

your pulled from your spiraling when luke returns from the bathroom, a wet hand towel in his hands as he crawled onto the bed, wiping your fluids off your skin. the gentleness in which he approached it with was shocking, yet filled your stomach with a heavy fluttering. he tossed the rag to the side and looked up at you, a slight, mischievous smile on his face.

"that was fun, huh?"

#xoxo #love u angels #luke castellan #luke x reader #luke castellan fic #luke castellan x reader #luke castellan fanfic #pjo #percy jackson x reader #charlie bushnell #charlie bushnell x reader #x reader #ೀ⋆⑅˚#lengthy fic but hope up enjoyed

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mandalhoerian · 1 year

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Shai! Shai! I've thought of another scenario for Leon😊 Altho being a new fan I've come to the conclusion that Leon is the type to believe he's not good enough for his partner, he believes they could do better then him. So imagine a Leon who has finally accepted he has feelings for you and works up the courage to confess only for you to turn the tables on him and say you dont feel good enough for him. I imagine he would be in disbelief? How would he react to his crush telling him "You're too good for me Leon."?

too good for me | leon kennedy x reader

pairing: leon kennedy x reader (unspecified gender) genre: fluff, miscommunication, the "endeared badass x normal person scared shitless of the endeared badass" trope. no spice, unfortunately. only good vibes and leon being head over heels smitten. enjoy! word count: 2.7K? It's short! notes: hi sarah! i am SO SORRY this has taken forever. you requested this one month ago! its been so hectic lately, i've been having health problems that required regular hospital visits and tests upon tests, but now that my surgery (yeah i know... yikes) is authorized i'm only waiting for them to call me for the date and have all the time in the world to get my rest and write. i'm also working on your other (wink wink) request! thank you so much for being patient with me. hope this is what you had in mind! i also added my touch and ideas to it lmao. happy reading!!

🌀 read on ao3!

“You’re too good for me,” is the hesitant, small answer you give him while avoiding eye contact and playing with your fingers in front of your office’s shared coffee maker Leon had made countless paperwork excuses to be able to simply stop by — to his question, that is, about why you wouldn’t go on a simple date with him.

You puff out an awkward laugh to smooth things over as humorous but it’s forced and not at all sincere.

It’s taken Leon a whole inner journey (Spain. Mostly the simultaneous trauma and catharsis of Spain) to get over himself to recognize what his heart truly wanted but was too pussy to look at before, yet here you two are. The lone angel in his life telling the failure Leon is that he’s too good? For you?

He simply stares, dumbly standing there, piping hot coffee that’s actually incompatible with his taste buds he insists he must do a detour to get from here simply because you often do, stiff and awkward in his hold, thinking he heard you wrong because he hasn’t gotten a good night’s rest — rest, not sleep — in forever since he came back from Spain.

He’s been forcing himself to come to work just for a glimpse of you and your pretty face to recharge his battery, heal his soul a bit, let you be all that occupies his mind despite being laid off after that outrageous mission that resulted in the president’s unwanted favor and nightmares upon nightmares with only anxious yet soothing thoughts of you as the best bad out of the worst he’s had to face— and what is it that you said again?

“You’re joking right?” Leon says, pride not knowing if it should be broken or not because he’s not sure to take this as a rejection, and it isn’t his intention for it to sound that harsh. He’s not some asshole who can’t take no for an answer, it’s your reasoning that has him downright jamming like a gun.

Leon has to remind himself to switch off work mode because now you look mousey as if he has a paw on your tail, shoulders pulled into yourself. “Sorry!” He feels so bad, heart expanding within his ribcage and it aches, fuck, he just wanted to ask you out and all he’s doing is scaring you. “I’m sorry, you were kidding. I didn’t get it— I’m kinda slow and you sound flat sometimes, of course you weren’t serious, I’m—”

“No, I was serious.” His eyebrows furrow at yet another self-degradation from you. “It’s you who has to be kidding. What do you mean too good for you?”

You are at a loss of words, mouth opening but nothing coming out, and finally look him in the eye and all Leon wants to do is lean down and capture your mouth, he’s heavily distracted by you licking your lips and swallowing, the sighting of the tip of your pink tongue makes his shirt suddenly suffocating and tight.

“I mean,” you begin tentatively, unaware of what’s going on in his head, vaguely gesturing to Leon. “Well… You’re you, I mean… And I’m. Me. Look at you and look at me. Why would you even…?”

“Hey,” Leon sets his mug on the counter, closing his eyes and pinching the insides with his thumb and pointer. The implications alone sent a zapping headache through his skull that he knows he has to rest to be able to unpack, especially when he’s finally decided on seriously pursuing you in spite of himself. Leon can’t let this remain unaddressed, for your sake and his sanity. “How about I wait for you after work today and we talk about this somewhere else?” He’s squinting. “In detail.”

“We don’t really need to—”

“We do.” Leon wants you to see he’s serious about this — about you. “Because I see something here that I want to pursue and we can’t have any misunderstandings. Would appreciate it if you at least give me the chance to clear the air.”

“P-pursue?” You swallow and Leon’s mind wanders again. “Clear the air you say…”

He breathes in. “Can you give me your phone?”

You slap it into his palm almost immediately, the speed with which you obey him without asking him any questions surprises him. He wants to scold if you’re willing to hand over your mobile to any guy who asks, but supposes it’s not his place — is frustrated this is what it takes to get him annoyed, as well. He isn’t some young adult. Weirdly, you make him feel like one.

He’s punching his own number in, despite the conflicting feelings, finally feeling like this is getting somewhere and he’s doing it when you start talking again, nervous. “You can uh, clear the air… right here… without taking me to a secondary location…”

His eyes flick up to yours in confusion and you look to the right immediately, and back to him. To the right. Back to him. It’s somehow comedic, because why do you look like you’re cornered by some bad guy?

You really look like you want to be anywhere else than here, Leon’s fucking this up and he doesn’t even know what he’s doing wrong. Was he going too fast? Should he have told you his number and let you save it instead?

You’re mumbling, nervousness clear as day for reasons he can’t fathom, he hears you, but he doesn’t really understand.

“What? What's wrong?" Leon asks, his voice laced with genuine concern. He takes a step closer, wanting to bridge the gap between you and alleviate whatever discomfort you were experiencing. "You seem... uneasy. Did I do something wrong?"

Your eyes meet his briefly, then quickly shift away again, as if you are struggling to find the right words.

Leon's heart sinks. His intention wasn’t to make you feel nervous or pressured, especially when he is genuinely trying to connect with you — then, in a brilliant moment of heart-stopping realization, the fact that you might just not be interested slaps him in the face and he’s…

Well. Wouldn’t that be the reality?

Leon is… He isn’t exactly the ideal man. Not with what he does, and how his life is. He’s aware of that. Have been running from forming connections because of what he knows will end up happening because of that. He can’t get attached and keep losing people — can’t keep getting hurt in the vicious cycle to prevent everyone from getting hurt. It’s been the bane of his existence ever since STRATCOM plucked him off straight from Raccoon City. Even if you work in the same field as him, just different offices, who is to say it will work out anyway?

He’s getting ahead of himself. You might not like him at all in the first place. Jesus.

Maybe you see him for what he is. Maybe you think he’s not —- the effort’s not worth it, and you wouldn’t exactly be wrong in thinking so. You could be wanting something else in life that he only has the desire to give you, and not the promise. He wouldn’t blame you, hell, who would blame someone for being their own person with their thoughts, wishes, wants and goals in life?

You’re too good for me, really, is his line. It has been right from the beginning, his excuse in running away from his undeniable, frightening attraction to you.

"No, it's not you," you finally managed to articulate, prompting Leon to release the breath he was holding, your voice shaky, playing with your fingers. "I just... I feel a bit overwhelmed. This is all happening so fast, and I never expected..."

Leon nods, his expression softening as he realizes the weight of the situation. He hasn’t fully considered how his sudden confession and determination to pursue you might have caught you off guard. He has been so focused on his own feelings that he hasn’t taken into account your own thoughts and emotions.

"I understand," he replies, voice gentle and reassuring. "I didn't mean to overwhelm you. I just... I couldn't keep my feelings to myself anymore. But please know that I don't expect an immediate answer or any commitment from you. I just… Well. I just wanted to tell you. See where this goes. Or, maybe, if that’s not the case… Get rejected for good so I can move on, you know?"

You laugh a little and it’s genuine — you have no idea how it turns Leon’s heart into putty right where it hangs between two lungs. “Do you really mean all of that?”

“Of course,” he says, offended the tiniest bit. “Why do you think I would joke about something like this?”

“It’s not about you joking, really…” You’re uncomfortable again, hesitating to tell him something.

“Hey, you can tell me.”

“Can you promise you won’t get mad?”

“What am I, your father?” He snorts. ��Come on, tell me.”

You brace yourself for it and he doesn’t understand why until you say it. “You, um… You’re kinda scary.”

He blinks. “Sorry?”

“Sorry!” You raise your hands up in panic. “I don’t really mean it like that, not to insult you or anything, it’s actually admirable, I’m just saying! Discipline, work ethic, unmatched field performance! You’re very… Very, uh… Intimidating, yeah, that’s the word…? I mean, like… You, uh, you’re famous, you know, we all know your work, you’re very hard working, working hard, very hard work — uh, um… So it’s…”

“I scare you?” Leon swears he felt his eyes get bigger the faster you kept on vomiting words. “You think I would hurt you?”

“No!” You reject strongly, waving a nervous hand at him. Silence befalls later, which you follow awkwardly with a silent, guilty. “Maybe,” after clearing your throat.

He had always strived to be a protector, but he hadn't realized that his image and reputation — what it had become after Spain — could have such an effect on someone he cares about.

"I never meant to scare you," he says softly, his voice filled with genuine remorse, he puts the coffee mug on the counter and leans his hip on it, shoulders sagging a bit as he crosses his arms. The thought of you only feeling intimidation about him leaves a bitter taste worse than the coffee does. "I guess... I've always been so focused on work, on the dangers just around the corner — I’m aware how it might affect my relationships in the long run so I never attempted to form any at all, but I never realized how it might affect how people see me in the first place. I never wanted to make you, of all people, feel this way. I could never hurt you. Never."

“I didn’t want to imply you’re a guy who’d intentionally hurt someone—”

“Don’t worry about it,” he sighs, ruffling his hair to get rid of the awkwardness. “So I’ve just been bugging you this whole time, huh? Jesus. I’m so sorry.”

“No! No, don’t say that, you’re amazing! You’re like a hero around here…”

“Around here doesn’t mean shit,” he replies curtly, and regrets cursing like that in front of you immediately. It’s unbecoming of him — and doesn’t help his image in your eyes at all. He’s getting frustrated. His tone lowers into a softer, more disappointed, heartfelt one. “I only care about how you think of me.”

“Well, you’re amazing,” you say again, bashfully this time, and it prompts him to look at you. There’s something shy about you now that has him standing taller in anticipation, wondering if it’s him reading this wrong or not. “It’s pretty well-known if you didn’t know.”

“I don’t know,” he prods, idiot heart fluttering at the way you’re flustered. “What do you think? Besides intimidating, I mean. Not reporting on the local gossip this time, if you don’t mind.”

“You seem like a nice guy,” you settle. The middle ground. “I’ve seen you with the president’s daughter.”

Leon's expression softens at your words, a mixture of relief and gratitude washing over him. He takes a deep breath, trying to let go of the tension that had built up within him. The mention brings a slight smile to his face, memories of Ashley flooding his mind, a fondness evident in his eyes. "Ah, Ashley. Yeah, that was quite the adventure. Though what can you be other than a nice guy when your mission is the president’s daughter?"

“I know a couple people who’d treat her like a package to be delivered. You prioritized her wellbeing more than anything.”

“What else was I supposed to prioritize?”

“You know what I mean. Emotional wellbeing. I’ve read your initial report and her statement. You cared about her.” A smile tugs at your lips, he can tell you’re a bit more comfortable now. "Especially during what you’ve been through. It's impressive how you handle yourself in those situations."

He shrugs modestly, a hint of pride shining in his eyes. You respect him. "I guess you could say it comes with the job. But it's not all action and danger, you know. There's more to me than just being a government agent."

Your curiosity piques, and you tilt your head, prompting him to continue. "Tell me more. What's Leon Kennedy like outside of work and missions?"

It catches him off guard that you want to know more and take the first step. You could have just rejected him. His heart picks up, chest expanding in excitement, he’s glad for the opportunity to share a glimpse of his life beyond the chaos of his work — he’s normally not eager to share pieces of his life like this, but… He’d give it to you on a silver platter, whether it'd lure you in or not. That’s how Leon knows he wants this with you so bad. “I wanna lie to woo you but… Would it be too unattractive to tell I really don’t have a life outside of work? I’m still trying to find some balance in my life. The upper echelon guys are pretty ruthless and demanding. I guess it means I can say I’m into traveling?”

“Is this the cool guy way of saying you’re an introvert these days?”

The unexpectedness of it is what gets him to throw his head back to laugh, and he catches you staring, scrambling to rub his face to get rid of it and regain some composure. “Yeah,” he breathes. “Pretty much.”

“Well,” you gesture at him, there’s a vague pink hue dusting your cheeks. “What are you into, then?”

God, he can’t stop, “Other than you?” from escaping his dumb mouth. He shouldn’t have said it. It’s too corny. So uncalled for. Your mouth hangs open and he wishes he could rewind the tape to take it back and choose some other option. “Say… What about we continue this discussion after work? I know a good coffee place. Let me make it up to you for invading your lunch time. I’ll tell you all about me, what do you say?”

You look at the clock on the wall, he knows you didn’t get to have anything because he decided to turn up and serenade you with unwanted attention, it’s two birds with one stone for him if you decide to accept — he wouldn’t have asked if he didn’t see a perfect moment to seize the chance.

“Coffee sounds perfect,” you nod, with no pressure from him, and it lifts a great weight off his shoulders. “Would it be okay if I eat something too?”

Why are you so adorable? You don’t know that you own the power to get Leon to have your superiors let you go for the day, but he can’t get too excited right now. “Say the word and it becomes a dinner date.”

It gets you flustered again, you don’t know where to put your hands, and he’s so happy about it. “It’s a weekday… That’d be a bit exhausting…”

“Okay. Coffee date it is.”

He’s noticing you like the cheeky confidence, and it makes sense, considering the intensity had you intimidated. “Thank you,” you say. “I’d like that.”

“Believe me,” Leon can’t stop the grin from overtaking his expression. “My pleasure. You’re honestly too good for me.”

There’s the sudden urge to kiss you when vulnerability and shyness lights up your whole face, but he’ll take it slow. He has to take it slow. For himself.

#leon kennedy x reader #leon s kennedy x reader #leon s. kennedy x reader #leon kennedy #leon kennedy imagine #leon kennedy fanfic #leon kennedy fluff

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acuar-io · 8 months

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Advice on how to achieve aesthetically pleasing gameplay photos!

UPDATED: 4/22/2024

I made this post earlier today and people were interested in the comments! Which made me more excited to make this post~

this is just some advice from me! this isnt a tutorial or anything of that sort, but I will be linking some things that could be helpful for editing gameplay! :D

First things first, I want to say that I use a graphics overhaul, lighting mods check my resources page for what reshade i use if ur interested.

I use these lighting mods & graphics override specifically:

sunblind

graphics overhaul

Lotharihoe's ootd* curseforge download :)

Northern siberia winds in-game better lighting mod (bright base)

these are some other lighting mods you can try out as well!

Luumia's NoBlu & NoGlo

these are some other lighting mods like sunblind

how to install lighting mod

I just wanted to add these things in since we're talking screenshots + I wanted to share for the no reshade ppl <3

Now we can move on to the advice!

I love the simple style of gameplay editing so much, but for me I love creating an ambience with my posts and put the audience inside of my gameplay. I also enjoy storytelling with gameplay more than just the "usual" gameplay post (when it comes to me). I am currently playing the globetrotter challenge with my sim Daichi. I really went all out with the editing for that gameplay. For this one its very much a virtual collage of my sim doing things. Trying new things and getting inspired by others is always fun and cool! Remember when u do take inspo: link to the inspiration and @ the simmer that inspired u!!

In my other save (my cozy save) I also take creative liberties there.

its more of a cozy vibe & silent story-telling (storytelling w/o the dialogue). for my cozy save i take inspiration from @/stellarfalls. er gameplay really helped me find my niche thing in the way i play the game tbh!

Angles/Screenshots

When you're taking your screenshots, angles are important. Depending on the shot, you're putting emphasis on a specific thing. This post is very helpful and talks about different types of angles/shots and what they mean. Check it out especially if you want to play around with the way you take screenshots!

Here’s some editing tips from @stellarfalls !!

simmingstars editing tips

Reshade

If I want to create a moody or dreamy ambience I can use reshade. Looking for a reshade that will fit the overall vibe is a must or you can make your own~

i know not everyone is able to use reshade because they're not on windows. I highly recommend using photoshop actions to create that ambience you're looking for.

*These can be used in photopea, but it cant read topaz clean. If you want to achieve topaz clean in photopea, check this post out! just something i'd like to add in case people are new to all of this + dont use photoshop. Lastly, I want to say if you decide to edit photos on photopea, it does tend to crash if you upload a big number of photos and slows down. I usually upload like 6 or 8 and then save and repeat the process. Its kinda annoying, but ive been using photopea for a while now so im used to it. My mac users, use early-grapes butter action if you want things to look cleaner and less harsh!! + the other ps actions down below. I used these a lot when I was a mac user. Of course, that comes with extra steps, but I feel its worth it in the end.

I like these photoshop action packs bc theres tons of stuff in here that can help create a reshade like look:

intramoon's ps action dump

wooldawn's ps acton dump

smubuh's photoshop actions

early-grape's butter action

hazelminesims's ps actions

Templates!

I loveeeeeee templates so much!! theres so many out there to use for gameplay. It really adds more to gameplay posts! This can be dust/dirt, film burn, that cute camera template etc etc. templates are really fun to use and play around with~

I usually go on deviantart to find templates to use! if you want to check out my deviantart account you can find it here! I favorite a lot of things I can use for gameplay screenies.

Gifs

making gifs is cool because it brings the gameplay "to life" ~

EZgif is a free website that converts videos to gifs. You'll need a recording program like OBS (which is also free).

i like making gifs when i want to capture a (cute) moment (kisses, hugs, cooking etc etc). Its also cool to capture the weather in game like when its snowing or raining.

Little details

Some people really go all out on editing gameplay posts like adding hair strands and adding more details to sims faces (catchlights, tears, blushing, etc). You dont really have to do this, but I want to mention it anyways! I want to try doing this at some point because I enjoy editing my gameplay posts/photos in general and adding tiny details is fun to me lol. It adds realism to posts, but it isnt necessary!

Procreate is a really good program that you can get if you have an ipad. its 10$ and thats, that. You dont have to make any payments. You can also animate on procreate too if you're down for that!

Find inspiration in other simmers!

the sims community on tumblr is filled with such talented people! Theres lots of gameplay simmers who dont do your typical gameplay posts that you can check out and learn from!!! Ive always struggled with getting the right angles when taking screenies. I looked at other simmers and how they take screenshots & it was really helpful for me since I noticed I would take too many over the shoulder photos on my sims lol.

I think thats all the advice I have! I hope this was helpful and if you have any questions please send me an ask or dm! :D

#simblr community #simblr #i hope this was helpful!!

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estrellogy · 4 months

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How to Use Astrology to HELP, not Hurt

I’ve been an astrology student for years and here are some helpful things to keep in mind when you read your own chart:

- Aspects don’t stand alone. They are always communicating with other aspects. That’s how the energy in you works. Dont reduce yourself to a single aspect and obsess over it. I dislike astrologers who use this helpful tool to instill fear.

If someone ever tells you an aspect means you’re doomed, I really advise you to question the person telling you this. Astrology should be use as a self-development guide, not something that you’re tied to and have no control over.

- There are no good or bad aspects, only what you make of it. For example, Venus trine Mars is considered a great aspect by many while Venus square Saturn is literally seen as the devil.

Venus trine Mars simply means the planets’ energies communicate harmoniously with each other. But, where there’s no conflict, there’s also less potential for growth and self-knowledge. It can lead to complacency and lack of discipline. Since it often attracts and receive positive reactions from people, it can actually make you become dependent on others’ approval. When you’re used to things always being positive, a small negative incident feels really big. And that leads to more unhappiness than a negative aspect would.

People often want things to always be easy. But pain is a teacher. That’s why Venus square Saturn is actually not as bad as people say, as long as you’re a willing student of life. When you allow the harsh aspects to show you where you need to develop and grow, you will truly embody the potentials of that aspect.

Venus square Saturn people often deal with insecurities when they’re younger. It’s usually called the “Ugly Duckling” aspect. They can become extremely judgmental with their appearance and always feel like they need to be physically perfect to be worthy. They overcompensate to prove their worth.

But once they learn that they’ve always been enough and recognize the beauty they hold WITHIN, they glow up without much effort at all. Even though they had to go through a lot, the confidence that they get from overcoming pain will be genuine, authentic, and lasting. It will not be affected as much by outside influences like Venus trine Mars. They actually become so magnetic because nothing shines more than inner beauty and self-assurance.

— If you want to use astrology terms, this is coming from someone with an Aries Moon, Virgo Venus, and Cap Mars. I am not afraid to tell you the truth, even when it’s unpleasant. I think a great teacher is someone who helps you recognize your own power, not instill fear and make you feel small. It’s tough love but I believe that this will help at least a few people patient enough to read through it all 🤍

#astro notes #astro observations #venus trine mars #venus square saturn #pick a card

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jungkookschin · 2 years

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not so bossy

summary: An irksome feeling infests Jungkook's system when his girlfriend lets him know that she can't meet up after not seeing him for three weeks. pairing: d1 soccer player!jungkook x reader

genre: angst, fluff

author's note: idk anything about football/soccer and yes im american so i used the term soccer 🙄lolz, also i got some inspo hearing about these famous athletes and their gfs so i pulled this out of my ass. pls enjoy (or not)! ALSO IF U HAVE ANYTHING U WANT TO TELL ME AB ANY OF MY PICS PLS PUT IT IN THE ASKS (not replies) BC THIS IS A SECONDARY BLOG

“Just because I’m not some big shot D-1 athlete doesn’t mean that my life doesn’t matter,” you grimly convey, eyebrows furrowed in pure vexation whilst your pretty lips curl down in a frown.

Jungkook exhales slightly, his pointer finger and thumb coming up to massage his temples. “Y/N, that’s not what I meant and you know it-“

“Then what the fuck did you mean?” The rapidity by which you cut him off pierces his heart like an arrow, because he’s never witnessed you being so abrasive. It hurts him to know that he’s upset you- that his inconsideration induced such a crestfallen expression from his one and only girl.

“I just didn’t want you to meet up with that guy,” Jungkook quietly explicates, unable to adeptly convey what his true intentions were: that he just missed you and didn’t want you to hang out with some other guy, even if it was just to study.

A scoff escapes your mouth, your obsidian orbs glaring bullets into him. “Jungkook, we were studying. It was for school. You of all people should understand that,” you sneer, your harsh words making his heart drop, the unpleasant feeling of guilt infesting his system, because he knows you’re right. Knows he’s been a shitty fucking boyfriend. Knows that you’ve been nothing but understanding, that you've been his personal angel ushering heaven to him, a task you accomplished everyday of every second.

Jungkook’s reticent silence tells you everything you need to know. “Don’t talk to me for the rest of the day,” you murmur quietly, though loud enough to make the words thunder in his heart. You turn your heel to walk away from him, your arms securely hugging your textbook to your chest, as if you were subconsciously shielding yourself from him. He hates that so much.

Jungkook stands frozen, unable to chase after you like he wants to. His heart is screaming at his brain make his motor system send his body after you..Instead, your figure disappears into the crowd of students flooding the hallways and he’s left there with regret plaguing his system.

How did this even happen?

Jungkook vividly remembers that dreadful text message you sent whilst he was on the bus, heading back from fall training camp.

y/n ♡: hi baby, im so so sorry. i dont think i can make it to our date tonight. this senior in my class asked me if i wanted to join a study group with him and i want to go so i do good on my final :( sorry baby.

Jungkook's lips immediately curl down at the message. Despite quite literally sharing an apartment together, he hadn't physically seen you or touched you in three weeks. With travelling out of town for a tournament for a week, and his two week long training camp immediately proceeding the tourney, he hadn't gotten the chance to come home and see you. Your absence had a deep and profound effect- he had to drown himself with intense physical training to distract himself from the fact that you weren't around.

Jungkook is a D-1 soccer player- one of the best in the nation- predicted to be one of the top picks in the first round of the Major League Soccer super draft. He takes his craft very seriously, centers most of his attention on his body and mind to refine his physical ability and ultimately become one of the best soccer players in the world. Since high school he often opted for a nasty gym session over a party, admiring Messi and Ronaldo over pretty girls, and even went to his club soccer tournaments over attending prom.

That was- until he met you.

The university you and Jungkook attended was widely renown for its impeccable soccer program- and computer science program. By God's grace was he assigned to you for a group assignment freshman year. Your face was slightly flushed when you kindly uttered "Hey, I know you're a huge athlete or something, so I don't mind carrying the project if you have to focus on sports." In reality, your intentions were selfish, solely concerned about your own grades and how this group project may cause them to fall, but Jungkook still thought it was the cutest thing ever.

He appreciated the consideration, but gently let you know that he was certainly able bodied and willing to complete the assignment. Had you not been so pretty, if the way you pushed your glasses up your face not been so adorable, he would have gladly taken the offer, not being quite privvy to anything academic related.

But you were arguably the cutest girl he's ever seen, so he was willing and eager to put in the effort.

Feelings blossomed, cavernous eyes gazed into each other and Jungkok kissed you for the first time. Seeing that you enthusiastically reciprocrating his energy, Jungkook took it as a sign that he scored the girl of his dreams. Group projects lead to late night calls and incredibly vulnerable talks in his car, then arcade dates to salacious movie nights. He officially asked you to be his girlfriend with a bouquet of the most delicately beautiful roses you've ever seen.

Jungkook thanked God everyday for your naturally compassionate nature, and for when you assuaged all his dreadful anxieties about not be an adequate and involved boyfriend. You understood that the nature of your relationship with him would not always be the most attentive- that he had no choice but to sort of neglect you when he had to travel over state and country borders for the sake of his athletic career.

You understood it and you whole heartedly offered your bona fide support.

You appeared at his games with cute red bows binding the curls in your hair, his oversized red jersey thrown perfectly over your precious abdomen. His perfect cheerleader, his number one motivator- and his teammates certainly appreciated you because he performed better when you were in the stands oggling at him with your starry eyes. He had to play better when his girl was in the crowd.

When you weren't able to be physically present at his games, you sent him the most adorable selfies of you streaming the game on your TV, laptop, or phone, going the extra mile to snag a selfie whilst Jungkook was in the frame of your device.

It really is common knowledge that Jungkook adores his girlfriend. In fact, anybody can tell by looking at the measly three photos on his verified Instagram account (courtesy of the NCAA). There was one photo of Jungkook and his teammates from a few years ago, all men have their hands on their cut and bruise heavy knees. They've got gold medals around their necks, ginger smiles on their faces after winning some summer league tournament.

The second photo was from last year when the men's soccer team at your university won the NCAA Division 1 Men's Soccer tournament, and rather than a photo with his teammates, there is one of him and you. Jungkook who was drenched in sweat from an intense yet rewarding game has his hands wrapped around your waist in the photo, leaning down and pressing a kiss on your cheek whilst you smile gleefully. His gold medal is adorned around your neck, resting on your chest rather than his. The caption reads "scored the winning goal for my number one girl", and the comments are permeated with "awwws" and "how cute!" Of course, you are slightly suspicious of the genuiniety of those comments since most of them are from girls who have a crush on him. How do you know that? You just do, consider it girlfriend intuition.

The most recent photo is simply a gorgeous photo of you at dinner. It was from his point of view- his prettiest view when you were sitting across from him enjoying your steak in a strapless black mini dress. In the photo your french manicured fingers are gripping your wine glass, the stain of your lipstick visible at the edge of the cup. The expanse of your neck is visible, making your aura all the more alluring. Your hair is in a sleek bun with the exception of the face framing pieces that dangle on the sides of your face.

You remember that day, Jungkook looked so dashing in his black button up and slacks, and when he presented you with another bouquet of red roses you melted since they were the same flowers he asked you to be his girlfriend with.

The caption is simply a black heart.

Jungkook shuts his phone off and throws it on his bed, hands rubbing his face as he groans into his palms. After you told him not to speak to you for the rest of the day, he meandered back to your shared apartment, earnestly anticipating your return home. The intoxicating scent of your vanilla body spray fills the room, making him all the more miserable.

He knows that he wasn't giving you the attention necessary in maintaining a healthy relationship, that he wasn't amply putting his share into it, but his mind was so trained on soccer that it hadn't occurred to him to check on up on you. He winces at a certain memory where he was so entranced in practicing penalty kicks that he completely forgot about your date at the pumpkin patch. He went home wondering where you were, and his heart dropped when you marched into the home, slamming the door and refusing to speak to him. After profusely apologizing and making it up to you, you later forgave him and everything returned to its usual nature.

But this time was different, because it is 2AM, and you're still not home, causing Jungkook to fall deeper into his despondency.

He spammed you with so many pleading text messages, his eyes scanning over each and everyone as his thumb scrolls further and further to the history of your shared messages.

[2:52 AM] jungkook: y/n baby im so anxious right now. please let me know where you are. i wont go to bed unless i know that you're safe. you don't need to come home or talk to me, just send me your location so that i know you're okay. im so sorry and i love you so much.

As his thumb scrolls up, his texts from earlier in the night appear.

[11:38 PM] jungkook: baby where are you? im starting to get worried about you. please come home.

[9:12 PM] jungkook: my love, the food is getting cold. if you come home we can still enjoy a meal together.

[8:24 PM] jungkook: baby, i know you're upset at me. please let me make it up to you. i cooked your favorite meal, and we can eat together once you get home. i'm here waiting for you.

A soft exhale leaves his lips, his thumb scrolling all the way back to the same stupid argument that triggered all of this.

When Jungkook first received the first message, it inevitably upset him. A grimace on his face and the furrow on his eyebrows indicated as much. He missed you so much and was looking forward to seeing you so fucking badly. He longed to feel your body against his, the thought of you keeping him up all of last night. He missed your pretty face, the vanilla scent of your soft hair, and the way you made him feel so complete. So, of course he's upset. The first thing that caught him off guard was that you were cancelling on him after three weeks apart. The second thing that caused a deeper furrow in his brows was irksome personal pronoun: him.

Were you really going to ditch him to hang out with some guy? He was trying to be understanding considering the rigor of the university's computer science program- and wanted you to do everything you could to maintain your perfect grade point average. Nonetheless, he was already pouting at the announcement of your absence.

jungkook: him?? who's this senior?? and are u sure u guys cant reschedule?? miss my girl too much

y/n♡: i miss u too, im so sorry,, it's just that this code is really fucking hard and jaebum offered to help so obvi i accepted lol

Jungkook's concern morphs into unamusement, because he is very familiar with this motherfucker. He sighs deeply, reminiscing when his teammate Hoseok approached him and informed him about a certain Jaebum making inappropriate comments about his girlfriend. Not inappropriate as in sexual, grotesque, or expletive. Had that been the case Jungkook would have beaten the shit out of the guy and risked playing the next season. The type of inappropriate Hoseok intended to express was that Jaebum was going around calling you cute- you, a girl who clearly was not single. Jungkook never explicitly told you about this, not really concerned that it would have a significant impact on your very healthy relationship, but it still displeased him.

He wasn't able to constrain his words, mentioning something when he witnessed Jaebum clearly flirting with you when he picked you up from class.

"Jungkook don't worry," you giggled. "He's just a senior in my class- he's really smart so he was giving me some homework advice."

Jungkook tensed at that. "Alright babe, just be careful."

After that, Jaebum really wasn't ever mentioned or considered. He fully trusted you so Jungkook wasn't worried, until at that very moment.

jungkook: babe

jungkook: i thought we already talked about this

jungkook: that guy literally likes you

y/n♡: ewwww lol dont put that idea in my head😭 gross

jungkook: y/n, im serious

jungkook: he really does, i can tell when someone wants u its my boyfriend intuition

y/n♡: okay baby, and if he does??? u dont trust me??

jungkook: ofc i do, but it makes me uncomfortable to know that he invited you to a “study group” , who knows what he’s planning???

jungkook: who else is gonna be there??

y/n♡: it’s just gonna be us, but i promise u u dont have anything to worry about. uk how this class has been kicking my ass.. and jaebum is the only one with an a

Jungkook uses his pointer finger and thumb to massage his temples. The thought of you and this guy studying together enkindles something vile in his system, but nonetheless he chooses to trust you since he knows how important school is to you. However this irksome feeling bubbles in his chest, and he feels like has just has to do something about it.

The next message he sends is his last attempt to assuage the undeniable burning in his chest.

jungkook: i know, can i at least come with? to make sure he doesnt do anything weird?

y/n♡: i don't think it's a good idea. i dont want things to be uncomfortable

Jungkook scowls at that. Weird? Why would him tagging along be anything of the sort? More importantly, why were you choosing to protect Jaebum’s feelings over his?

jungkook: lmao uncomfortable? are u two planning to fuck on the table or something , why would my presence make things “uncomfortable”?

Jungkook winces when his eyes train on that very ill intended text message. He knows damn well he crossed the line with that one, but your response didn’t indicate that you were upset, probably dismissing it as one of his stupid jokes.

y/n♡: jeon jungkook🙄🙄

y/n♡: i’ll see u tonight at home baby💗💗

Jungkook knows he should have left it at that, but three weeks without having you with him were so excruciating, and he longed for you so so much. He loves being an athlete; he loves playing soccer, but the intense drills and back to back games have been agonizingly tough on his body that all he wanted was to cuddle up against you in your cozy and comfy bed. Maybe have a little movie night and give you a little massage though it was his muscles that were sore and tense. But no, you had to study with some slimy guy. Consider him salty.

When the bus dropped the men’s soccer team off on campus, he bid his farewells to his teammates, and for some strange reason his legs just start walking to the library. Huh, how strange. What an anomaly it was for his feet to randomly move by themselves!

He acts very nonchalant, hands shoved into his sweats whilst he wanders between the dozens of book shelves arrayed in the campus library. Nonetheless, his eyes are rapidly shifting toward every corner in the library, in hopes that he “accidentally” runs into you.

Jackpot.

You and Jaebum are sitting adjacent to each other at an occupied table, both of your eyes trained on your Macbook screen. Jungkook puts a hand on his chin, acutely scrutinizing the situation at hand. The distance of your chairs is quite satisfactory to Jungkook- not too close, but he would appreciate it if you were further away. Jaebum is very clearly giving you a lovestruck gaze, and when he scoots his chair closer to yours Jungkook narrows his eyes.

Jaebum is such a fucking weirdo, his hand creepily advancing towards yours that is resting by the keyboard, and you are so exceedingly focused on your screen that you fail to notice. You randomly remove your hand away from where it rests on the table, and scratch your head with it. Once you turn towards him, his close proximity startles you, and you jerk your chair back in the opposite reaction, the most mortified look on your face.

Jungkook isn’t the best at reading lips, but Jaebum is currently expressing something to you, the most awestruck look on his face and Jungkook scoffs at that, clearly understanding the situation. Without thinking he advances towards you, pulling your chair back with a tight grip whilst he looks daggers into the man. “Can you please stop hitting on my girlfriend?”

Your head whips around at the voice of your boyfriend, but it goes unnoticed by Jungkook whose attention is soley on the man.

Jaebum scoots his chair back a little bit, scratching his head. “Sorry man, I didn’t know she was your girlfriend-“

And before Jungkook can interject you speak up. “I’ve told you many times that I have a boyfriend- and quite frankly I’m appalled that you’re trying to make a pass toward me when we agreed that we would be studying,” you say firmly which induces a goofily proud smile to appear on Jungkook’s face.

“I’m sorry Y/N, I-I just really like you and didn’t know how else to talk to you," Jaebum elaborates in attempts to elicit some sort of sympathy from you. His attempt is entirely futile, and you ask him to leave, already vexxed by his inappropriate shot at making a pass at you.

You begrudgingly saunter behind Jungkook, the two of you leaving the library. Jungkook, who is acting under the assumption that you are annoyed by Jaebum, reaches out for your hand, falling into confusion when you rip your hand away from his.

"Babe?-" his eyes round, uneasy at your dissonance.

You exhale deeply, eyes apprehensively glancing around at anybody who may be eavesdropping. "Why the fuck did you follow me?" you whisper shout at him, hands thrown down petulantly.

"I was worried about you," he clarifies, not even bothering to claim that it was a mere coincidence. "And I missed you so much," his tone glosses over softly. He steps forward to embrace you, and the air shifts once you put your hands on his chest and push him away from you.

"Jeon Jungkook, I clearly told you that I would see you at home," you stonely enunciate.

Irritability spreading throughout his system, he scowls. "It was killing me to think about you being alone with this guy when I was missing you so much, and I told you that he liked you but you didn't listen-"

"I admit I was wrong about that, but I am also perfectly capable of handling myself." You hesitate momentarily, gathering the words before spitting them out hastily. "I think you've made it pretty clear that you don't trust me- which is seriously fucked up."

"What's fucked up is that you were hanging out alone with a guy who clearly likes you! You haven't seen your boyfriend in three weeks and chose to spend your time with some guy rather than with me!" Jungkook fires back, attracting some concerned glances from bystanders.

His postulation enrages you. "Need I remind you why I haven't seen you in three weeks?" you sarcastically inquire, eyebrows creasing in awe at the audacity of this man.

"Babe, I have to leave for soccer, you know that, so don't weaponize it against me," he coldly says, and really, all his words do is spread the indignation through your veins like a wildfire.

"I have never weaponized soccer against you, so don't you dare put fucking words in my mouth," you hiss, giving him the dirtiest look he's ever seen from you.

"I have been nothing but supportive of you. Never said shit when you're out there with a bunch of cheerleaders who like you, and with your teammates that fucking cheat on their girlfriends with those cheerleaders! Yet the moment that I prioritize my academic career over you, you pull some weird shit as if you can't trust me!" you finish, your ice colds words leaving Jungkook frozen as a sculpture, as if nitrogen replaced his blood because he realizes you're right. If he ever spend a moment in your shoes, he would lose his goddamn fucking mind because of his naturally possessive and overprotective nature.

"I'm sorry, that's not what I was trying to say," Jungkook clumsily tries to salvage himself. "I appreciate you so much for always being there for me and when I go pro I'll make it up to you. You'll be my soccer wife, and we'll have a mansion with our kids- I'll buy you whatever you want," he conveys, his feeble attempt of sewing together the cuts of the situation.

Instead of a commiserating look, you give him a look that tells him you're even more irritated.

"That's not the point! You don't get that I don't want my identity to be just Jeon Jungkook's soccer wife. I want to be my own person, have my own successful career," you frustratedly communicate. "Why do you think I'm trying so hard in this stupid fucking coding class? Because I didn't want to see you? I always want to see you, but I have to make sacrifices too. The class average is 56 and Jaebum is the only one with an A, but my life isn't as important as yours so you don't want to be sympathetic of my feelings." You finish, cooling off once you've exploded at him.

Jungkook rips away eye contact with you, looking towards another direction, feeling slightly chagrined at your legitimate display of vexation. "I guess your studying didn't seem as important to me at the time," he abashedly murmurs.

“Just because I’m not some big shot D-1 athlete doesn’t mean that my life doesn’t matter," is how you retort, leaving the situation full circle.

Now, it's 3 AM, and you're still not home. Jungkook feels himself falling into a pit of dilapidation and guilt, feeling so remorseful of how shitty he's been. You truly are his super woman, because he's positively sure that he wouldn't be able to handle it if you did what he had to do on a regular basis. He couldn't even handle it when you were studying with another man, let alone travelling and leaving him at home by himself.

The apartment simply feels so empty, and it makes him feel all the more lonely. When he walks into your shared bathroom, his eyes glossing over your cosmetics and skin care products, he becomes absolutely miserable. Debilitatingly picking up your moisturerizer, he squeezes the bottle, product falling falling into his hand. He looks into the mirror and rubs the ointment into his skin, sighing exasperatingly because he wishes you were standing by his side.

The sound of the door suddenly creaks open, and Jungkook rushes into the living room thinking that you may have returned home. His face immediately falls when Jimin marches into his apartment.

"What the fuck are you doing here?" Jungkook deadpans.

Removing his shoes at the front of the house, Jimin scoffs. "Why'd you leave your door unlocked at 3 AM?"

Jimin plops down at the dining table, picking at the food Jungkook meticulously prepared for you. "This shit is cold as hell," he mumbles before grabbing the plate and shoving it into the microwave. Jungkook doesn't say anything, just grinds his teeth whilst he lays down on the couch.

"Y/N's not home?" Jimin questions with a mouth full of steak.

"No," Jungkook quietly mumbles, dejected and losing hope that you would return home that night.

"I ran into her a few hours ago," Jimin states casually, causing Jungkook to robotically spring up like a zombie and join Jimin at the dining table. "Where?" Jungkook asks like a crazy man, eyes wide, his veins protruding through the whites in his eyes. Jimin gives his friend a distasteful look before protectively covering the food Jungkook made. Jimin analyzes the situation carefully before it dawns on him that you aren't around.

"She's still not home yet?" Jimin asks, concern spreading throughout his face.

"No," Jungkook squeaks out, discouraged by everything before he bangs his head on the dining room table.

"I ran into her at the mall," Jimin says, attempting to provide some comfort to his younger friend. "We looked around a little bit, but I had to go pick my brother up and then I dropped her off at the gym."

Jungkook pauses, owlishly blanking into space whilst he takes a few moments to fully comprehend what just zoomed past his ears. The sleep deprivation and exhaustion is seriously hindering his cognitive function, but he just can't sleep until he knows that you're safe. "Huh?"

Jimin sighs, rolling his eyes before repeating what he just said. He raises his palm to smack the back of Jungkook's neck, which elicits a gruesome glare from the younger one.

"I ran into your girlfriend at the mall. We looked at the dinosaur exhibit. I dropped her off at the gym," Jimin firmly enunciates.

Apparently this computes more briskly than the first time. "The gym?" Jungkook asks, an amusing look of confusion hazed on his face.

"Yes," Jimin replies, frowning at Jungkook's sluggish responses.

"She went by herself?"

"I don't know," Jimin responds, a hinge of more empathy in his voice. "She said something about a personal trainer but I have no clue what she was doing."

An exasperating sigh leaves Jungkook's lips, too much information for his fatigued brain to compute. He didn't even know you had damn personal trainer- you don't even need a fucking personal trainer when your boyfriend is one of quite literally a D-1 athlete. It's not something he wants to even think about, the prospect of him being a shitty boyfriend plaguing his mind even more.

Jimin's eyebrows furrow in concern for his younger friend, and his hand gingerly pats his friend's rock hard back. "Do you want me to stay the night? Or stay at least until she gets back?" he suggests whilst the younger one buries his handsome face into his large palms.

"Please," Jungkook mutters.

Your unexpected entrance proves that Jimin's request was unecessary, because you casually waltz back into the apartment, making Jungkook practically whip his head towards the sound of the opening door.

"Jimin?" you jabber, a little startled at his unanticipated presence.

"Oh hey Y/N!" Jimin greets you more awkwardly than he ever has before, as if he interrupted something though he was there first. "How was the gym?" he releases a sheepish chuckle, and you internally cringe at his overt display of politeness.

"Oh, um. It was good. Are you planning on spending the night?" you ask, slipping your shoes off as you join the two at the dining table.

"Pshhh, no. Absolutely not! I gotta head home.." his eyes erroneously shift all over the room, poorly concealing how clearly he wants to leave. "Right about.." his head whips down at the non existent watch on his wrist. "Now!" He scoots the chair out and -for some reason- he tiptoes out of the house, bidding you and your boyfriend a farewell as he gently closes the comically creaking door.

You look towards your beloved, Jungkook looking dejectedly at his twiddling hands, avoiding eye contact with you. A soft exhale leaves your lips and you plant your palms on the table, getting up before you approach him. Even when he's sitting down at your wooden dining room chairs, he's only a little bit smaller than you- training and the gym have done him well. This profound emotion of tenderness rushes into your heart, and you bend down, placing a tentative and delicate kiss on his fragile cheeks.

"Wanna come with me to the bedroom?" you ask, gentleness lacing your voice at to hopefully assuage the vulnerability of the situation. It is undeniably true that you were upset- even livid at him, but after mulling it over you realized that he is your one and only. If anybody was deserving of your empathy, it was him.

You stride to the bedroom, settling down on the side of your bed with your big hunk of a boyfriend mimicing your actions like a little puppy.

"I made us bracelets," you blurt out hands digging into your pockets, before you pull out two identical bracelets dangling from your fingertips. The bracelets were childlike at best; you used black plastic beads and yarn, the same type of shit toddlers use in pre school when they learn how to do basic things like cut in zig zag lines. The bracelets are mostly made up of black beads, with a pink heart bead in the center of them.

Your fingers wrap around your boyfriend's larger hands, and you gingerly slide his bracelet on his dainty wrists. You suppose you overestimated the circumference of his wrist, because it hangs off his wrist like a necklace.

Jungkook still hasn't said anything, but finally looks up, and your eyes meet his glossy ones.

When you realize that he's crying, you hand cups his cheek, and you use your thumb to wipe the tears that cascade down his handsome face. "No no no," You're panicked at his sullen state. "Don't cry," you express desperately. "Please don't cry, I'm sorry."

Jungkook gazes at you so intimately and intensely, and he feels as if all his resolve breaks now that you are finally in front of him.

"I-I just didn't want to lose you," Anguish laces his voice, and he sounds so desperate that it makes it feel like your heart is being ripped into pieces. "Thought I was gonna lose you," he whispers, and you're compelled to just hug him- so you turn to him and wrap your arms around his neck, and his automatically snake around your waist, so naturally- like this action was done so out of muscle memory.

He holds you tightly, like he never wants to let go of you, of this. He holds you like he's found his sweet solace in your embrace. His neck finds comfort in the crook of your neck whilst he pours his emotions out into your honeydew skin.

"I can't believe you still love me."

"I can't believe you made me a fucking bracelet even after everything. You're so sweet, so perfect."

"I don't deserve you- you mean everything to me. I swear I'll make everything up to you, just give me one more chance."

You pull back at his words, a concerned haze painted on your face. You settle on your knees to meet him at equal eye contact. "Did you think I was gonna dump you?"

Jungkook tears away his eyes from yours. "I don't know. I thought you were getting sick of me- I guess," and the

You sigh, shifting your weight backwards so that your ass rests on your heels. You gnaw on your bottom lip, finding the right words to say. "Jungkook," you begin, conjuring the courage to verbalize everything you've been itching to say. "I... I have never loved anybody as much as I love you." You inhale, nostrils flaring slightly before you continue your somewhat clumsy attempt to bandage everything.

You speak very steadily so that he can fully digest what you are about to say. "And I don't love you because you're a soccer player, or because you're verified on Instagram, or because you're ESPN thinks you're going to be super successful. I love you because you're you."

Jungkook's undeniable heartbeat is pounding, so loud that he can hear it in his ears. Love. Your love is interpermeating his being, seizing control of him completely and fully. There are no words that can properly encapsulate how he feels. Just Love. Love times a million. "Y/N-"

"Just shut up and let me talk," you cut him off, preparing once again to regurgitate your feelings.

"I just love you so much, and because I love you, I would never do anything to jeopardize our relationship. You just have to trust me, even if it makes you uncomfortable. I'm an adult- I know what I'm doing."

Jungkook purses his lips perceptively, nodding ever so carefully at your simple yet overflowing explanation.

"It just hurts me that you felt like you couldn't trust me enough to be alone with him. I know I was wrong for not trusting you when you said he liked me, but even if he were to make a move on me, I would never reciprocate or encourage that behavior. I put so much trust in you, and I really want you to work towards putting that same trust in me. And.. I'm sorry for throwing a temper tantrum, I was just embarrassed I guess. "

Jungkook grabs your hand as if the moment is fleeting, his already soft expression softening impossibly more at the sincerity of your words. He holds your hand to his chest, and you can hear the rapid beating of his heart.

"I understand," he automatically expresses, which concerns you because his answer was almost too immediate. You're not sure if he's properly digesting what you are trying to communicate.

"I was just super frustrated- I missed you so much and thinking of you and that guy was killing me. I trust you, but what if he did something to you?" The disclosure of his authentic feelings relieves any doubts you had about the immediacy of his answer.

"Babe, I'm not an idiot," you reply. "I have a taser and it's not like we were in the woods in the middle of the night," you point out which elicits a soft chuckle from Jungkook.

"You're right baby, my girl's a genius," he leans in and presses a familiar and delicate kiss to your bottom lip, causing butterflies to erupt in your stomach. When he pulls away you're left with a lingering feeling of longing, and he beams at you.

"You just gotta be patient with me, but I swear I'll try to be less," Jungkook takes a moment to find the right word. "Overbearing."

You give Jungkook a pursed smile and nod your head. Before you can respond he presses another delicate kiss to your lips. Though the kiss is fleeting, it's as if your lips mold together perfectly because he knows you and your lips the best. "Thank you for being you," he presses his forehead against your, mumbling against your lips, the utmost sincerity in his voice. "I love you, so so much," he says, hot breath palpable against your lips. "Thank you so much for everything you do. Thank you for understanding, for loving me. You're just- just perfect, perfect for me. Made for me, and I love you so much." His emotions overwhelm him, and his eyes become glossy. "My love for you scares me. The thought of you leaving terrifies me so much, and if you did, I don’t think I would ever recover,” his words are delicate, fragile like he’s a butterfly that could fly away at any moment. It was up to you to keel him grounded.

You close your eyes, savoring the moment of him being so close. " 'm not going anywhere," you hum into his lips, and he sighs blissfully, snuggling more into your protective embrace.

That night, you fall asleep on his chest, his arms instinctively wrapped around you for the entirety of the night.

#jungkook imagines #jungkook angst #jungkook fanfic #jungkook scenarios #bts scenarios #bts fanfic #bts jungkook fanfic #bts jungkook scenarios #soccerplayer!jungkook #jungkook fluff #bts jungkook drabbles #bts imagines #bts jeongguk scenarios #jeongguk fanfic

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aerequets · 2 years

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i very much appreciate how Yor, the strongest character, is so feminine

she’s obviously the physically strongest, and arguably the most mentally and/or emotionally strong. what i really appreciate is that this strength and her femininity are complements, instead of the two being treated as mutually exclusive like in many other media.

yor is soft spoken and gentle and kind to others. she feels emotions strongly and cries in front of others and shows her happiness. she has a natural inclination to take care of others. she is good with children, she is great at housekeeping. she may not be good at cooking but by gosh she tries; she wants to get better. she assumes the best in others and finds other women pretty and kind and admires them. she’s family oriented.

yor is also insanely strong. she’s gone through extensive physical training since childhood, has multiple scars, has dealt with all kinds of people. she can kick a moving car, incapacitate a whole cow, take down a whole fleet of assassins, etc, etc. the list goes on. but despite all this and all that she’s been through, she didn’t become a tough, sardonic, mean-lean-killing-machine kind of character.

what i’ve noticed in a lot of media is that there seems to be this kind of tradeoff that people think needs to happen in order for a female character to get “truly strong”. basically feminine = weak and masculine = strong. the character cries? not anymore she will never crack that poker face ever! the character cares for others? psh what no, care for yourself she’s not your maid. homemaking skills? useless, all she needs is the strength of her Fists and Harsh Words. she’s not like other vapid girls, she actually cares about the Real Important Fight which, undoubtedly, is also male-dominated.

of course, all of this is set up as an opportunity for the male love interest to come in and “break down her walls” because women are just waiting for the right man to change them, but i digress.

why? why are the things that are inherently feminine deemed as inferior?

a good example i can think of is cinderella, or to be more specific, an opinion about cinderella that was popular (and may still be, i dont know tbh): she is weak for needing a prince to save her.

lets break this down: this girl gets emotionally, phyiscally, and mentally abused from her childhood into young adulthood by the people who are supposed to care for her. despite all this, she remains kind towards others and attentive in what she does. she seizes what she believes could be her one and only chance at freedom, however fleeting, and ends up catching the attention of the person who is ultimately able to pull her out of her situation.

yes, she didn’t bust herself out of the house and shank the stepfam with her glass shoe. but does this mean she is weak? is that kind of emotional resilience within someone after years of abuse what can truly be categorized as weak?

anyways, all this is to say that yor is built up as the strong one in multiple ways, and the narrative doesn’t act like her nonmasculine qualities are somehow reductive or lesser, and i very much appreciate how rich her character is. i like so many things about this series man im just

#having post midnight thoughts #i started like. outlining something else that led me to think about this and then i just wrote this LMAO #yor is just so!!!!!#ALL OF THEM ARE SO!!!!#im not good at analyses or like in depth things like this but I JUST NEEDED TO GET THIS OFF MY CHEST #YOR IS SO GOOD OK #I WONT TAKE NO AS AN ANSWER #yor forger #spy x family #sxf #sxf yor #thorn princess #sxf thorn princess #my writing

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shradsmanifestt · 1 month

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hi, im sorry for bothering u right now. ive been asking around for advice everywhere because i really need all the help i could use right now. my anxiety is flaring up like crazy because my results come out tomorrow and im so scared because if i mess this up then my future is ruined. my mental health has been horrible and that has severely affected my grades but in most asian countries they dgaf about that and basically think it's nonexistant for minors so ofc i'm still undiagnosed, and if i were to apply to a uni i wouldnt get any good chances anywhere. if i could just get 3 Bs in my AS levels it would be okay or else i'd have to retake it and it's super costly here.. i don't wanna put my family through that because they'll talk me down, degrade me, destroy my self esteem which i've managed to build back a little. they were like this since when i was the topper and thats what made me burnout. undiagnosed adhd, trauma, depression also contributed to it

im applying the law, but instead of the feeling of success that everyone else gets i feel panicked. the 'feeling' people usually get when they're in the wish fulfilled state, the feeling of accepting it and it being real—im not getting that. i dont see a clear picture when i visualize. every time i try to, i end up breaking down and feeling like a failure... but I'm still trying to go on because why is it that the people who hurt me and practically ruined my life get to live successfully, while i suffer? thats not fair... i promised myself that if i could just get 3 Bs, ill turn my life around and work really hard... but is it over for me? i want to win, im trying to, but im scared

im trying my best to visualize myself getting 3 Bs, reenacting my friends faces when i get the results, praying to God and thanking Him for blessing me and continuing to bless me, but there is this fear still lingering at the back of my mind... i feel like I'm not doing it right. i have like one day left and I'm so nervous. im going over posts, tweets, and every time I feel a little better, it all comes crashing down because of doubts. theres only one thing one my mind right now: 'how am I gonna turn it around in one day?' i know that the 3D does not matter and that everything is done in imagination, but here i feel like its not done in imagination either

right now nothings clicking in my head, whatever i read is getting scrambled in my mind, i feel so lost and empty. could u please tell me what to do in this specific situation? u can be as harsh as you want if that's what's needed to get the point across. im really sorry for the bother and id be really grateful if u could please help out, ive never been this desperate before... my life cant be over before it even started

Hey love,

I get you, I really do but trust me when I say this.

THIS SHIT IS REAL AF. Manifestation is real af. It's as real as the fact that you are a human being. All you have to do is trust yourself that it is already done. If good results is what you want then that is exactly what you'll get. You need to choose to stop having doubts because it is already done. That is the simplest answer I can give you. Persist on what you want.

I am glad to tell you this but I just got test results for a major exam held in my uni today and I got into the 95th percentile just by saying to myself that my super power is aptitude tests and that I already scored great. In my friends group only 3 of us were eligible and I have 70+ more marks then them as well. If I can do it, you can do it. You need to stop doubting yourself. Atleast stop doubting manifestation. Cause at this point you're only gonna manifest your doubts.

I'll give you a scenario - If you're worried about getting bad grades, Trust me when I say this you're gonna manifest exactly that coz you will manifest exactly what you assume. You can choose to stop that right here, RN. Choose to accept that you got great marks. I mean don't even like aim for B's go for A's. I don't care even if you left the paper blank coz if you assume you're the topper, that is exactly what's gonna happen.

If you do get bad marks and I'm gonna be harsh here - You're the only reason why! You're gonna manifest exactly what you assume to be true even if it's good or bad. Your sc mind don't differentiate btw what's good for you or what's bad for you. It only knows what you feed it.

You got this, TRUST ME

Love, Shrads.

#law of assumption #loassumption #loa #affirm and persist #loa tumblr #neville goddard #consciousness #loa blog #loatwt #imagination #affirm and saturate #saturate your mind #shradsmanifestt

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sanigopiece · 2 years

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why uta is a well-written character

reposted from twitter since i saw uta get a lot of hate on there. a lot of people seem to not get her character so i am writing this post in hopes of getting people to see the light. anyways here we go,

1. her motivations are well supported by her backstory. it all began in the tragedy in elegia years prior where shanks took the blame for the destruction of the city and left uta in the care of gordon. this led uta to being forced into a life of loneliness and isolation for the rest of her growing up years.

these feelings accumulate while she studies music until she eventually finds a den den mushi to livestream her performance. here she learns of the harshness of pirates in the outside world and coupled with her resentment towards the red haired pirates for leaving her motivates her to revisit her old dream of starting a new genesis. this is a solid way of story cohesion between uta's backstory and her actions in the present. everything ties in very nicely & its easy to understand & empathize with.

2) i've seen some complain about how uta saying that she knew all along that she had caused the destruction of elegia & called it bad writing. this was actually her way of coping with the years of isolation but also her grief in shanks leaving her.

i speculate that uta realized she caused the destruction of elegia when she learned about tot musica and when faced with this, she chooses to find someone else to blame because guilt ate away at her so she chose to continue believing the lie that shanks did it. so it isnt bad writing because we are given more context on her mental state at the time and it is meant to be a gateway for viewers to empathize with her more but i guess people missed that.

3. she is not entirely evil. yes she is a villain because she believes she is doing whats right in order to achieve her goal however she still has goodness in her heart. she could've easily kept people trapped in the song world after tot musica was defeated.

but she didnt because she realized that what she did was wrong and she changed for the better. yes there's moments in the film where she does upsetting things like tearing shanks's hat but these were done in her mentally unstable state so it is unfair to entirely fault her for her actions. she is merely a misguided and misunderstood lonely girl with a dream so dont be so hard on her. she is good deep down.

4. her character is unique. already a given since we dont have that many music centric characters except maybe brook but even brook's powers aren't linked to music so uta is really special. also her songs carry so much meaning and not only does it set the mood for most scenes but it also adds to the story. i highly recommend checking out the lyrics of each uta song because they really tie in to the events of the story and you might just enjoy her character more.

5. her canonity adds more flare to the story. oda recently confirmed uta to be canon and this means a lot to both shanks and luffy's backstory. it does not detract from their backstories but rather it gives more context like how we understand a lot more about luffy's dream and why he wants a musician in his crew thanks to uta.

as for shanks, he now has more reason of being and we also got some clues to his lineage in the movie. this is really nice since most shoe horned characters have issues when they're added to canon.

alright so thats all. its been quite the long thread but i love uta and i want more people to appreciate her instead of hating or mischaracterizing her. if i missed anything do let me know. thanks and have a nice day <3

#one piece #one piece film red #one piece film red spoilers #uta is well written #uta one piece #im tired of dudebros mischaracterizing uta #imagine hating uta wtf #for the fans of uta #i love uta so so much #shanks #luffy #elegia #UTA MY BELOVED

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eddiediazismyhusband · 3 months

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breathe friend you know tommy is bones in s8, he's not bucks endgame the reliable leaker has literally been clear about that. don't believe anything that psychopath on twitter says, she's literally insane.

oh trust me i don’t believe anything she says lmao

and i know the leaker said that about tommy but tbh that dont mean shit about whether or not they are actually going to fix any of the fuckery they pulled in s7

just because they are allegedly giving tommy the boot doesn’t mean they’re going to actually get their shit together and stop ship baiting us; so like i said until they actually start to give us any indication that they’re going to stop mistreating poc characters for cheap drama and that storylines are actually going to be thought out beforehand rather than thrown together because “ehh, this is good enough” i’m not going to be wasting my time. these shows are meant for entertainment. if i am not being entertained by what’s being done, why am i going to waste my energy on it?

i dont say this to sound snippy or rude, anon, and it is NOT directed at you specifically (and i really hope it doesn’t come across that way i am just bad at emoting through screens 😭😭), i promise, but sometimes it feels like people who try to “talk me off the ledge” in these anonymous asks don’t really look at what i’m actually saying and they jump to the conclusion that i’m just making shit up to panic about, but the fact of the matter is that everything i talked about in that post is something that could feasibly happen… all of buck’s love interests up to this point have not been narratively satisfying; developed or not. so even if tommy does end up going like the leaker said (again not getting my hopes up because things change at the drop of a hat in this business) that doesn’t mean they will actually follow through with queer eddie or that any other potential love interest for buck will be in any way narratively satisfying. i’m not saying i’m closing on buddie, because i will love them and ship them together when my body is six feet under, but after the burning dumpster that was s7 post the cruise ship arc, i don’t have the faith in tim that i had before.

at the end of the day, yes abc is a more accepting and inclusive studio, but it is still that: a studio. a corporation. a money maker. they don’t actually give a fuck about the fans. i have seen time and time again that these shows do this cat and mouse shit with a queer ship and then never follow through, even if one of the characters involved does end up being confirmed queer. maybe it was a little harsh to say that tim is only interested in money, but after how little thought and care he put into last season it’s hard not to feel like he actually cares about the fans who have stuck with this show since the beginning.

i’ve mentioned before that i have stuck with this show for seven years. i have shipped buddie since s2. i witnessed the s4 buildup and subsequent letdown in s5 and 6. I know that was not tim’s fault specifically, that KR and Fox both fucked the show over

but that does not mean that tim won’t also change his mind— we saw evidence of that last minute with all the rewrites that were happening post mid season hiatus with s7. he found out he’s getting another season so he changed the plot of 7b, and if they get a season 9, all the more reason to keep dragging the buddie bait hype along with now true intentions to follow through?

i reslly really reallly wanted to trust tim again especially after the potential he had with the shooting arc in s4, but sometimes it feels like he himself has closed on buddie since then unless it’s done as a last-ditch effort to save the show… again, i’m not saying i think bt is going to be endgame, but just because they aren’t endgame doesn’t mean buddie is and that is what pisses me off. that we will have been waiting for nearly a decade for this ship to go canon, we will have gone through so much hate and vitriol from the bt stans, we have been teased and built up time and time again (even in s7), we have been bait and switched with no satisfactory outcome, and we have been laughed at the entire time, and there is a possibility that none of it will actually pay off, all because some white man gets to call the shots and he’s shown that all he cares about is melodrama and trolling people online to stir up shit.

anyway, i didn’t mean to hijack this post, anon, but i wnated to further expound upon what exactly my point was in my original post, which was not that i believed Bree’s delusions or that the helicopter pilot is buck’s endgame, but that i won’t trust tim to actually go through with anything promising until i start to see actual concrete irrefutable evidence of it.

#911 abc #911 #911 on abc #eddie diaz #evan buckley #buddie #buddie 911 #buck and eddie #911 buddie #911 discourse #tim minear #anti tevan #anti bummy #anti bt #anti bucktommy #anti tommy kinard #anti tim minear (kinda)

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fictionfixations · 3 months

Text

birthday bloom kalim

notice how much more azul speaks then kalim, cause azul's all flatter-y and like. the type to ig do ill deeds by walking circles around his prey and striking when they dont expect it (as in slipping in little things here and there that could make it harder to notice for example)

but kalims all honest and more to the point, so he doesnt need as many words to get there

oof

💀 kailm. sweetie...

admittedly i feel like his upbringing of basically being spoiled and kept as happy as can be from any stresses (as in yknow always being first in stuff and doing what he wants- remember that mention of kalim finding jamil during his break cause he asked the security guys to like idfk see th camera footage? or like. to find jamil. like. i mean. he was a kid but also that kind of screams of abuse of authority, but to be fair kalim was under the impression that jamil was his friend and would have no reason to think that jamil wouldnt want to play with him as much as kalim does. you see? because he's been able to see the world through sunshine and rainbows [in comparison to jamil being faced with the harsh reality and meant to be 'mature' enough to know what hes meant to do] it means he misses these cues, that he can be so oblivious to harmful intent. or like. being so positive that it could almost blind him? like

he wants to do his best to stay alive because. remember he mentioned that one time how 'what if [his poisoner i think] had a change of heart? it wouldnt mean anything if he was dead by then'. but thats under the assumption that theres. well. to put it bluntly, good in them and that they would act on it. i really dont know how to word it in a better way.

and. its not that its bad to view things in a hopeful way, its just that too much of it can be harmful.) only does him more harm

cause like. hows he gonna survive on his own? and i mean there might not be a situation like that. but like. by them raising him like that, it means that he doesn't know how to take care of himself.

and while he has servants and everything... im of the opinion that it would've been better to raise him self-sufficient. i mean spoil him as a kid ofc precious bby but also make it clear that he should also kinda be able to depend on himself too? like. like listen

make it clear that while he can trust other people, that they can also betray him. and i get that that creates trust issues, and also idk he probably already knows this in canon (its just that he wants to believe that they can change. and also because it just never occurred to him that jamil could turn on him since hes always been there)

cause. we know his other asim relatives have tried to hurt him. or well. maybe it was only mentioned in kalims' labwear vignette? i thinki it was that one.

so like. understanding that, and then giving him the skills to be able to manage on his own when needed to. not having to rely on other people all the time. cause i mean. well. this isn't the greatest lesson to teach but its like. the only one you can fully trust is yourself??

and i mean yeah he cares for himself (because so many bad things could happen if he died. or others could get hurt/punished because he died.) but it genuinely feels like hes only doing it for others and not for himself

maybe im puliing all of this out of my ass

but im STILL not over kalim talking about how frustrating/annoying it was to know that kalim only won because of jamil. that it was because jamil held back (also in relation to the truth of him always being chosen being broken, because it wasnt true at all. which i mean, if theres something that gets established in your head as what the truth is, finding that it isnt true at all is.. a lot. like. idk. that parents arent invincible, that they're human too.)

and then grim shoots him down with 'i didnt even get picked [to peform]! how do you think I feel?'

and kalim immediately apologizes. like

i swear this is like one of the only times i feel like kalims ever been outside of his happy 'im here for you if you need me' thing

or like one of the only times hes expressed his feelings (and probably knowing he's privileged, so not wanting to express his issues because he knows so many people have it worse than him ?)

and in all honesty. if he ever gets feelings talk about himself in book 4. i forgot a lot of it. and i think it mightve been partially because i knew the twist in advance so it just hurt me going through it knowing that they were wrong of who they suspected so. yeah.

uhmm. as you can see. i have a lot of thoughts about kalim. haha oops

#thoughts #twst #twisted wonderland #twst wonderland #kalim al asim #twst vignettes

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arminsumi · 1 year

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hiii ^^ (It’s me again, sorry that I’m writting so many request but the way you wirte is something)

so, i have been thinking if you could wirte pt.2 for ,,Marley’s Guaradian” — and if you dont have any ideas, honestly I have one — so basically Armin brought reader to the aircraft, and Levi is obviously upset with him. while they are having a little argument, where Armin tries to explain Why did he brought someone so dangerous here, reader tries to knock out Eren, since he has the Founding titan, and Marleyan Army wants it back, Armin obviously stop reader before anything serious happens + reader finds out about Zeke’s betrayal

sorry if It’s too much, i’m sending you virtual cup of motivation and thumbs up for whatever you are working on! take care and dont push yourself too much!

p.s. i wirte the request again beacuse something went down with my Tumblr — if you see another one from my acc with the same text you can ignore it, beacuse i dont know if i actually sent it ^^

˗ˏˋ꒰ 🍒 ꒱ Marley's Guardian Ⅱ

Armin x fem!reader / part Ⅰ

Overview; Armin brought you back to the airship and you found out the truth about your War Chief.

Content; drama, angst, canon!au, Marleyan!reader, switching sides (obeying Armin's commands)

Warnings; S4 spoilers!!! mild violence (hair pulling, Levi giving verbal threats, reader scratching Eren and drawing blood), profanity, S4 Sasha scene, total cliffhanger ending because i'm mean lol

Note; ah dw i love to receive your requests! actually i originally planned to write about armin bringing Y/n back to the airship, but i wasn't sure on the length so i just deleted like two paragraphs' worth of content 😂💀 also SRRY IF THIS IS AGONIZINGLY LONG but i had too much fun writing it while listening to the most dramatic aot ost lol

Armin's hands were trembling.

"You brought their god damn dog on board? Are you trying to kill us, Armin?!" Levi spat.

"Sir — " Armin choked. " — sir, I couldn't leave her to die. I'll accept the consequences for anything that happens from here — could... could you please stop holding her by the hair?" he asked nervously.

Levi's eyes became slitted with anger as they flitted between you and the blond, bloodied soldier. It required incredible strength to fight an Ackerman as a sword-wielding combatant, but with words it required an otherworldly courage.

"Sure." he said slowly, dangerously, and hauled your weight by the hair — a searing pain spread across your scalp.

Everything was a bit blurry, but you felt cool wind brush your face. You were high up... up in the sky? The Scout's airship door was slid open, turbulent airflow filled the gondola. You were forced into a kneel at the edge, too weak to fight back yet Levi still held apprehension in his chest because of you.

"Shall I let her hair go now?" Levi asked sarcastically.

"No!"

You saw Armin's eyes glaze over with fear, you heard him babbling desperately to his captain.

"If I toss her off this airship right now, I will sleep soundly tonight."

"Captain! Please hear me out!" Armin exclaimed desperately. "It would be senseless murder, she's no longer hostile! Like I said earlier, she could have killed me, but she didn't!"

A long silence ensued after his words, one impenetrably thick and jarringly apprehensive.

"Captain..." Armin's voice weakly punctured the silence. He sounded like he was using the last of his strained vocal chords to plead with Levi.

"She's their weapon. Don't mistake her docile behavior for surrender, Armin, she's just out of ammo after fighting."

"Captain."

"She's their weapon." Levi repeated through gritted teeth, "Unless you intend to keep her as such, I'm kicking her off right now."

Armin's mind buzzed for solutions as the longest silence yet ensued.

"C — can we bring her to Commander Hange first?" Armin asked.

After a small moment of begging, another silence ensued, one broken by the harsh and grating sound of your whimper as Levi flung your body in the opposite direction of the airship's exit.

Without regard for his comrade's bewildered stares, Armin rushed to you. "Are you okay?" he asked. The smallest head tilt from you was enough to settle Armin's high-strung nerves.

Levi let out a forfeiting sigh, "Sleep is for the wicked..." he grumbled under his breath. "Alright, let's take her to Hange and that mutt. Mikasa, come with us."

Now, you were supposed to be at your weakest — or so that's what Levi and Armin and the rest of their comrades in the gondola thought.

But when the door leading into the airship's control slid open to reveal Eren Jaeger, you lunged for him like a dragon.

Though he had quick reaction time, you clawed at him much faster than he could shield his face, resulting in three stripes of red across his cheek. He bore a grimace of wolf-like canines.

It required both Levi and Mikasa to restrain you while you thrashed around, but they didn't have to for long.

In your fit of blinded vengeance, you didn't notice a very familiar face sitting besides the owner of the Founding titan, whose hurt face healed over, whisps of steam rising out from your claw marks until they disappeared entirely.

"Stand down, Y/n." Zeke's voice penetrated the atmosphere.

You looked at him wide-eyed, utterly shaken.

"... War Chief?" you croaked confusedly.

But your confusion dissipated at once. Understanding dawned on your face, causing your features to be dragged down.

"Treacherous bastard!" you screamed piercingly, Armin winced. "I once revered you! Bastard! Bastard!"

You ran your foul mouth on the War Chief, calling him audacious, calling him vermin, calling him a lot of things until the atmosphere felt aflame; Armin stepped in with a voice smooth like flowing rivers.

"Stand down, Y/n." he commanded simply, and you obeyed like a dog. He knew something very important about you that you weren't even fully aware of.

See, when you bore witness to your War Chief's treachery, these invisible threads keeping you sewn to his command snapped. Armin could tell, so he played a little experiment, sort of like throwing a stray dog a bone — to see if it would go for it.

It surprised everyone else to see you cease at once after Armin told you to. His blue eyes brought a calming sensation over you. When you looked into them, it felt like you were being stared at by an angel, although that was laughably ironic, considering what people called Eldians in Marley.

"Commander Hange, I have a proposal to make." Armin stood to his superior confidently, while Hange willingly listened.

The air in the airship's gondola shook with celebratory roars from the Eldian soldiers, Floch at the center causing it all.

But packed away into the quiet area were Jean, Connie and Sasha.

"Like hell she's on our side... I'm sleeping with not just one eye open, but two eyes open 'till we get back on solid land." Connie huffed.

Jean looked over at him, "Connie... that just means you won't be sleeping, if you have two eyes open you're awake." he sighed at his friend's stupidity.

"I know! It was a joke — " he began, "Anyways. No one trusts that reaper, so why does Armin?"

Jean shrugged.

"I think she may genuinely be on our side." Sasha chimed, her tone lighthearted for the fact it was a very wild situation. The enemy who had slain countless people in the Eldian army was on their side?

"Seriously?!" Connie began argumentatively.

The door slid open. Jean's eyes spotted you as soon as you emerged.

You squeezed into the celebrating crowd of Eldian soldiers, without Armin by your side. In the other room, unbeknownst to the others, he was previously wiping blood off of your cheek with his handkerchief. He reared his pretty blue eyes at you, and softly commanded that you wait for him in the other room.

Now he remained in the control room, discussing the future with Hange and Levi, while you tried to discretely blend in with everyone else.

"Heya, nice 't have ya on our side." Sasha greeted you.

Because Floch flashed a hostile look your way, you decided to stay with these three.

The conversation staggered due to your blunt responses. But it ceased completely in a moment, a quick yet slow moment.

Your keen senses felt someone clamber onboard the airship, and your lightning reflexes shielded Sasha from taking her fated gunshot wound to the chest.

BANG

Wispy fumes curled up out of the shotgun's muzzle. At the end of the gun's neck was none other than your little sister, Gabi.

🏷️; @chuuyasballz

#🐬ocean prince #armin #armin arlert #aot #snk #oneshot #angst #violet evergarden #au #armin x reader #armin x fem!reader #fem reader #armin x f reader #armin x y/n #armin x fem reader #attack on titan #shingeki no kyoujin armin

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