#this was the same time when my sibling like. heavily implied they were going to out me to our parents bc i said i would tell our mum that

[caruliaa]

did i tell u guys abt when once i was singing matildas part in miracle to myself when hanging out with my sibling and cousins and when i got to the "that kids like me should be against the law" bit my sibling said "i wish you were against the law" 😭

[yomogi-mogi-mochi]

Orchid Child, Dandelion Child

Pairings: Riddle & Sibling MC (NOT a romantic pairing)

Summary: This is going to take after Riddle’s overblot, and short and sweet. The term orchid child/dandelion child refer to children who may have very specific/different needs for their development, and those who need less accommodations or specific requirements for their development, respectively. They may grow up in the same environment but everyone’s needs are different, one child may have different coping mechanisms than the other. MC is heavily implied to have dyslexia, ADHD/Autism, and OCD (the latter two of which are often comorbid)

Notes: My brain is so dead. Enjoy this very short piece, sorry it's been a while.

TW: Graphic descriptions of embalming (weird tag I know but listen listen listen hear me out‒), also mentions of blood and human biology; past domestic/child abuse, and mental illness

GN Terms for MC

AO3 Link Here

Masterlist

--------------------------

Adjacent to your mother’s footsteps, you had always had a curiosity for the medical. Though it was never living bodies that enamored you. In death, biology levels all. Cremation, natural burial, or alkaline hydrolysis‒ no amount of money, or intelligence, magic, or talent would help anyone escape the inevitable. Whether able bodied, rich, poor, moral or not‒ all people returned to dust, bones, and decay. 

  Rituals like the embalming process always brought you a strange comfort‒ the draining and ejecting, bathing, refrigeration‒ the body incised, emptied of its filth, and sewn back up. Imagining the dissection of a body into each fleshy component relaxed your own‒ as if your cold body lay on a sleek, steel mortuary table, your jaws and eyes sewn shut and the biology of your body ready to be drained. Even if your insides were scraped out for people to see‒ you would not feel shame. No blood to rush to your cheeks, or your aching heart. Your mother had always dismissed this career choice, urging you to find something ‘more within your reach ’.

  Your body would be clean from its excrement, scrubbed of all the insides that capsized you from this world, and its people.

  Compartmentalization‒ your psychiatrist mentioned. It took you a few tries to correctly register the word in your head when you had gotten the report, you’re not sure if it’s correct. If you did not imagine this scene at least three times a day, you felt like your blood was going to burst forth from your membrane, hot and spastic, like a monstrous clot of nerves. Again. Again. Again. You cleansed this shaking contamination within you with whatever you could do. That’s wrong. You dig your nails into your palm, resisting the urge to lay the papers that were shuffled around by the headmaster on the floor, sorting and checking one by one if they were there. Again, again, again. You imagine an arterial tube weaving through the wounds of your hands, draining the warmth that itched against your skin, the function of your wandering eyes, and the defect of your mind.

  “I’ve signed off on everything. Is there anything else I can do for you, Mx.Rosehearts?” 

  “No, nothing else. Thank you, Headmaster Crowley.” 

  You gather the stack of papers in your file, you check through‒ quickly‒ your medical records, doctor’s notes, psych evaluations, annotated versions of section 504, interpreter documents‒ a variety of other loose papers that wedge inside the old file as best you can, just in case . Even for such a minute accommodation, lacking a legally recognized diagnosis prepared you for the worst. Rejection‒ a tumble and drag into a system not designed for you in mind. These accommodations were an afterthought after that system was built, something to make you “whole”. There were many experiences in your interactions with school boards that warranted preparations like this, which you scrubbed into your mind and routine. No one will help you‒ not the board, the teachers, your peers, your family‒ you must be prepared to advocate for yourself. There was never room for failure, and you made sure that these accommodations made up for your innate nature to do so in this system.

  You bow a perfect ninety degrees before you head out of the office, quietly shutting the door behind you with a soundless exhale. Adjusting the stack of papers in your file, you scurry off to the library to find a quiet corner to reorient yourself. You weave through the various open tables, the large seating area, and the comfortable nooks with beanbags‒ and instead, opt for your usual spot in the corner of the library, where you softly place the file on the desk. 

  That’s wrong. Again. Again. Again. Again. 

  You open and close the file four times, feeling a wriggling, hot feeling in your blood that completely halts your mind from moving forward with your process, despite the short amount of time you have until your next class. 

  No. Again. 

  With the sixth time, it feels right. You sigh in relief, thanking whatever higher being out there that the process didn’t take as long as before. Medical records, doctor’s notes, psych evaluations, annotated sections, interpreter documents. All in order, all there, only for you to see. A weight lifts off your chest as you shift your eyes around the library, and close the file. 

  You browse through the section of the library, running your finger along the spines of the books to spot a new read.  A mauve leather-bound book catches your eye, the gold letter glinting in the dusty light of the library. Smoke Gets in Your Eyes: Other Lessons From the Crematorium you skim the summary on the back. Satisfied, you work your way to the counter, where the librarian checks out the book with a smile. She pulls out the book slip at the front of the book and a pen. 

  Riddle Rosehearts. 

  You almost make a sound at the name, but instead, you quietly chew in your inner lip to provide some sort of grounding for the whirling feeling in your stomach. You feel sick when you write your name in the same cursive as the name above yours‒ just like your mother taught you. 

  “ Again .” Your mother would say. 

  You write. She slaps your hand with a ruler, reaching over your shoulder to erase the word. 

  “ Again .” 

  You write. She slaps, she erases. 

  “ Again .” 

  You write. She slaps, the paper begins to fray from the friction of your eraser, and the tears that run hot down your cheeks. Inertia. Inertia. Inertia. You repeat the word in your mind, trying to mold it with your hands. But the black text above the frayed paper seems to weave together, jumble, congeal. You push the hot coal in the back of your throat, forcing your bruised hand to write. 

  That’s not right. Again. Again. Again. 

  Why can't you just do it the way you're told?  

  Medical records, medical recommendations, psych evaluations, doctor’s notes, annotated sections, interpreter documents. So much extra weight that folder holds that you have to carry everywhere with you‒ just in case . 

  Again. Again. Again. 

  You open and close the locker shut, twisting the locker combination each time. At this rate, you know you’ll be late to class, way past your accommodations agreements. You hope Professor Trein won’t make such a big scene. 

  When you arrive at class, you are miraculously left alone by the professor and your peers. Breathing a sigh of relief, you take your usual seat, finding a practice exam on your desk. 

  You didn’t properly shut your locker. People are probably stealing your stuff now, breaking your things, tearing your extra records into pieces. You didn’t properly shut your locker. The documents are ruined, and you have to start all over again. You didn’t shut your locker. You grip your pencil, bouncing your leg, digging your nails into your palm. Yes, yes you did lock it. Three times in fact. Still, a voice persists‒ you didn’t do it right. Again. Again. Again. You scratch, and pick at the broken skin of your palm. 

  Eventually, as you continue staring at the packet‒ you feel a stab at the back of your shoulder. A student jabs forth the packet of papers that were collected from the back with an exasperated face. The papers are basically thrown your way as you add your half blank packet to the pile, swallowing down your anxiety. Trein continues class as usual, going over the review sheet. 

  “Mx. (Name). A word?” 

  You freeze in your seat, in the middle of gathering your things for next class. Students’ gaze furl towards you, and you pick at the wound of your palm to calm the rising panic in your abdomen. Begrudgingly, you pack up your things, and head towards Trein’s desk. 

  “I will excuse your tardiness for today since you have accommodations, but that does not explain the almost completely unfinished practice exam that we took in class. Do you care to explain?”

  You refuse eye contact. “I…” There was no way to explain it with any sane sensibility, or without alerting your mother. “I apologize sir. I was distracted. It won’t happen again.”

  He sighs, you know he doesn’t believe you. It’s your condition‒ you look to the stack of accommodation letters and agreements tucked under his elbow, and you feel that weight in your chest. 

  “Please, sir. I’ll do anything to make up for it I‒”

  A hand is raised at your response, with a pinch at the bridge of his nose. “It’s…It’s quite alright. I know you are trying your best, considering your… situation . Please finish the packet before you come to class next time.” Trein hands the packet back to you, which you accept with a silent nod. 

  The situation, the condition, the baggage. There have been many terms used to describe your disablement from the world‒ each more alienating than the other. You draw blood on your palm once more, looking inside the crescent-shaped holes in your flesh. You feel nothing but the trembling deep in your chest. 

  You sit in the shared space of the Heartslabyul dorm, hoping that body doubling will allow you to finish your workload. Though it takes you some time, you manage to finish your work before the sun sets, and you scurry back into your dorm room to begin your book. As you try to relax, the thought of a missing assignment, a failed exam, a systematic blunter pricks at your skin, spreading and choking your flesh. You read the same sentence over and over, but understand nothing. 

  Why can't you just do it the way you're told?  

  You hear a knock at your door, seizing you from your thoughts. You sigh, shove whatever scrap paper that had been lying around into your book, and reluctantly open the door. 

  Riddle Rosehearts. 

  You remember him from his perfect handwriting, his words that mirrored your own mothers. You could never get the “R” quite right, something both your brother and mother scolded you for. 

  “Rule of threes, you understand what will happen when you fail the third time.” Again. Again. Again. 

  Riddle had always resembled his mother much more than you had‒ in voice, in appearance, in tone. “ Rule of threes, (Name). You know what mother will do to you when you fail the third time .” He extended your mother's violence with all his likeness to her, in his face that would look down upon you with aberration, and his tightened fists that dragged your head to look closer at the paper, and realize your error. Every way he came into contact with you had been wrapped, tightly as flesh, your mother's violence. 

  You imagine that cold table again, but Riddle’s silvery eyes tethered you to the moment. It was as if you could feel every shifting tendon of your body, every pull of sinew and blood that pumped blood rapidly to your heart, and the back of your ears. But the guilty look on his face reminded you of one of the rare times he had broken mother’s rules. You realized he was as much of a child too, that day. Stretched thin and tall to fill your mothers expectations. 

  His stare is unbearable, you push through the tension in your throat. 

  “Can I help you, Dorm Leader Rosehearts?” 

  You think you see his worried expression, but your eyes dart from his gaze when he looks towards you again. 

  “You left this on the table in the common room.” He extends you the file that you thought had been safely tucked with your belongings. Your vision begins to distort‒ graying and distancing as you attempt to keep yourself calm from experiencing your literal nightmare . “I thought you wouldn’t want anyone to see it.” 

  “I…do not, no. I would not wish to shame you, or this dorm.” 

  Riddle takes a sharp inhale. You unconsciously tightening your body‒ imagining the postmortem stages. Pallor mortis, your blood pools to the souls of your feet. Algor Mortis, your skin feels on fire, and cools dead, limp. Rigor mortis, you stiffen and contract. The nutrients of your body drained, breaking down to gray sludge. You prepare for the breakdown of your body, your psyche, and your soul‒ the wounds on your body are only evidence to your movement through temporality in this system. Livor Mortis, your blood bruises your skin. 

  “I did not…mean that. I only meant‒ I felt…” He sighs, looking towards the floor. “I’m bad at this. But I didn’t mean that this is something shameful. I only wished to protect your privacy.” 

  You avert your eyes, unsure of what to do with him wanting to protect you in some sort of way. Perhaps his overblot changed him, but all you see if your mother’s shadow, when you look towards him. 

  “It’s not important, I apologize for the trouble, Dorm Leader Rosehearts.” 

  Maintaining his grasp on the file, he attempts to keep this connection going. “There’s so much I need to apologize for.” 

  You only manage a strangled sound, afraid to pull the file towards you. Afraid of movement, of air, of space, of time, of him. Everything seems to strangle you, you know that it was precisely designed that way.

  He cups a hand over your own. You try to repress the tremble in your body from the searing feeling of his palm, too afraid to look, speak, or move. You remain still, like a corpse, hastily trying to turn off your nerves and the bursting blood in your body, slaughtering it, and draining all feeling from your body. It’s been so long‒ your body rushes to catch up. You’re always catching up. Always. 

  “I don’t want to upset you. I just came to apologize, but I understand if you don’t want to see me.”

  Your mouth is sewn with silence, your jaw caught in a tremor in your mouth. Quickly‒ your mind makes the decision to speak‒ mother never liked when you didn’t answer to her questions. 

  The words scrape through your throat. “I…” A gulp to lubricate the convulsing motions of your esophagus. “Nothing is wrong. I apologize, dorm leader Rosehearts. It will never happen again‒ I apologize‒ I will make up for it. Please.” 

  His gaze softens. “I’m not asking because I’m asking you to apologize, or make up for anything. I’ve learned some things…I wanted to make up, but, I want to make sure you’re okay first.” 

  “Are you okay?”

  You spare a glance at his face, almost caught in the worried expression adorned on his features. “I don’t understand what the purpose that question serves. I can’t understand…” Still, you worry what will happen if it seems like you blame him for your lack‒ so you shift the weight on yourself once more. “I am incapable…of understanding. I apologize.” 

  “Hey.” He mellows his voice as much as possible, releasing you from his grasp. “It’s okay.”

  “You asked me a question. I was incapable of giving an answer that satisfies you. That is a violation of the rules, is it not?” You retract your hands to your chest, pressing your nails into the wounds on your palm. 

  Riddle folds his hands, almost nervously fidgeting with them. You almost react visibly with awe at the sight. “Our mother may have been wrong about a lot of things. I only recognized that after I attended here, and made many friends who helped me understand that. I am extremely regretful of the things I’ve done to you, and the things I’ve said. There’s no excuse for the things I’ve done, but I’m sorry. I hope you can forgive me someday‒ I want to reconnect, if you’ll allow me.” 

  You push the file against your chest. “...I don’t think it will be easy. For me, or for you. Especially for me.” 

  “Most things that are worth something aren’t. I realized something while I was overblotting.” His cheeks gradually bloom pink, a habit he’s had since he was a child. You remember the color most when he cried, but he looks sheepish. Igniting the same warmth in your cheeks, you look at his feet. Heels, you never noticed. He must be shorter than you. “I missed you. I really did. And I missed what we could have had. I’m sorry I couldn’t have been a better brother to you.”  

  “I think…I missed you too.” You admit. “I think neither of us can ask for help, we’ve been raised that way. We have drastically different ways of coping with that isolation.” 

  “I think so too. I have a lot of work to do.”  

  “ We do.”

  Rubbing your arm up and down, you soothe yourself‒ thinking of bodies and corpses, your skin buzzing from the thought of decomposition‒ what grows from them. The fruits of death lay thick and sweet on your tongue, as you stumble through a small smile. Riddle reciprocates.

--------------------------

End Notes:

Obviously this is only a small glimpse into what healing from abuse and trauma is like. But it’s a start. The first steps count.

I’m also in no way shape or form attempting to justify Riddle’s behavior. He’s a complete and total asshole for sure, but he was a kid‒ I definitely see him as capable of change.

The terms Orchid/Dandelion child are relatively new, and I find the pop-psychology approach to it very distasteful (as pop psych usually is. do your fucking research people. PEER REVIEWED ARTICLES!) But I wanted to use the terms to kind of critique the notion of this divide between "resilient" and "nonresilient". It's just a matter of needs, which are different for everyone. Making this hierarchical distinction is arbitrary and often times ableist, as it normalizes a singular, hegemonic way of reacting/experience/compartmentalization/coping. Anyways read more disability studies if you want to know more.

Because I’m not officially diagnosed (my disabilities are not officially recognized by law because for me the disadvantages gross outweigh the benefits, like literally having your human rights stripped away) I don’t know the specific details of acquiring accommodations in a school setting apart from my position as a teacher, but please let me know if there are any errors in the information so I can fix them expeditiously

I also wanted to write about the systematic issues disabled people (particularly those with “invisible” disabilities or those who are “undiagnosed”), I feel like I’ve been experiencing a lot of issues and push back from a system which is not built for disabled people in mind (and often is used against the community in an attempt to eradicate the category). Furthermore, I wanted to explore the aspects in which traditional psychiatry/curative methods are not built for neurodivergent individuals specifically. We often get diagnosed (especially those who have been socialized or perceived as female) with other disorders because of the perpetual stigma against ADHD, and autism in particular. Mainly why I didn’t go the psychology/psychiatry route, despite (one of) my undergrad major(s). It would have been immoral for me to be one, if held up to the current regulations set by the American Psychology Association, or the regulations in my home country. Anyways, lots of problems I wanted to address‒ not sure if I was able to explore them more at length, but I’d like to do more of this in the future.

The book Smoke in your Eyes is a reference to Caitlin Doughty’s book. I highly highly highly recommend her youtube channel and any of her books tbh. She writes/talks a lot about death culture and our perceptions of death throughout history, and creating a more death-positive culture.

I wanted to avoid some of the common stereotypes and misconceptions of OCD, which is predominantly characterized by excessive handwashing, needing things very neat and in place. I wanted to explore the more internal obsessions, rather than focus solely on the external compulsions‒ as I feel like the external behaviors that are often portrayed in media don’t explore the inner workings that make the disorder so hard to live with (and treat).

[ichangemyusertoomuch]

does anyone else cry at how much internalized homophobia Ianto has in Children of Earth?

I really would've loved them to focus on it more. they showed it enough to peak my interest, but they could have had more of Jack helping him past it.

on it's own, Ianto's sister's reaction to him liking Jack (and essentially coming out to her) made me cringe, because that's someone who was brought up in the same way as Ianto was (like how siblings have similar speech patterns or manners, because they were taught by the same parents). it immediately tells us that his family aren't exactly comfortable with gay people - though, luckily, she cares about Ianto enough to simply be utterly surprised and not suddenly dislike him. but Johnny (her husband) had the worst reaction immediately after Ianto and his sister talk (I'm not gonna repeat it) but I think it really showed how people in that area were really against the lgbtq+ community, or at least had awful and/or stereotypical opinions. (side note: when she was asking Ianto about he and Jack, he asked her if her daughter should really be hearing this. very heavily implying how wrong he feels he is)

but Ianto, someone brought up in this area, ends up with Jack, and the fact that they're both men hadn't been shown as an issue at any prior point. but suddenly in Children of Earth they present it.

for example, Clem states that Ianto is "queer, I can smell it" (whatever the hell that smells like) (probably fruity) (😂 I'm sorry, sorry), but then Ianto turns around, angry and yells "Oi!".

in the time Torchwood was made I suppose the whole world was a bit more homophobic, but it was not once an issue before then. so you have to presume it's just them trying to flesh out his character (which it successfully does).

which brings me smoothly onto my conclusion. if they were to create this subplot of internalized homophobia, then they probably should have actually made it go somewhere and not just leave me crying on the floor.

👍✨ (tysm for reading this all, if you got this far 😂)

(I haven't listened to any Big Finish audios, though I'm planning on buying some, so if there's anything there that goes further into this: I wouldn't know 😕)

[afreakingdork]

Crush Too Much - Part 4

RotTMNT Donatello x GN!Reader

Warnings: Light Angst, Fluff, Embarrassment, Overbearing Siblings, Aged-up Turtles

Synopsis:  So you met a customer three times at work and that made a pretty big impression on you? That’s nothing to necessarily get worked up over, but when you’re all prepared to ask for his number the next time you see  him and his brother gets involved instead, you might be in for something  more than you bargained for.

FIRST 💜 PREVIOUS

“So….” Was the melodic tone of his voice when he was joking grating or was it just the fact that Leo had insufferably been avoiding said topic of your meeting with Donnie while heavily implying he was going to ask about it at any given moment. Either way, after the first 7 fake-outs, you were no longer holding your breath.

“Mhm?” The response was automatic at this point. Using his tiny plate as a useless middleman, you watched as 5 tiny sandwich triangles disappeared into Leo’s mouth.

“I sort of liked the huge piece that takes up a whole section over on the left.” He pointed towards the said piece and the two of your wound around the packed gallery to get closer to it.

“Is it because it’s blue?” It wasn’t that you weren’t enjoying the event or even his company, but you wished he would just rip the bandage off already.

He looked at your with genuine offense. “I will not be reduced to a  mere shade. I can’t believe you would think moi to be so one-note.” He placed a dramatic hand to his chest which absolutely did not help his point. When you’d first arrived at the venue, he gushed over the same brand new trademark blue crushed velvet dinner jacket he now happened to be emphasizing. One of his eyes popped open to find you unamused by the layers of nonsense he was spouting so he straightened up as if properly inspecting the art. “I was going to say I like how you can’t see the brush strokes from far away, but you can up close.”

For the first time that whole evening, he’d had an actual astute observation. The change of pace was like a breath of fresh air. This particular topic was also something you’d heard your friend mention. “I think it has something to do with relationship between color and form.” You turned to look up at the piece. The muddled shades of blue reminded you of the good parts of the evening thus far. It felt like the two of you had successfully conned your way into what was very much a public event. You'd both snatched away a good portion of the free food and no one seemed to think you were freeloaders because of Leo’s outrageous ability to fit in amongst the art crowd by just saying the most the most ridiculous things you had ever heard. Different factions of critics ate up his nonsense and you were only alerted to the deception because every time it worked out, Leo would shoot you an obnoxious wink.

“’Color and texture are ends in themselves.’”

That one sounded like a quote, but you weren’t sure. Maybe he wasn’t all mouth and had been picking up on the cacophony of conversations that drifted amongst the high ceilings. You took a sip of a sparkling cider that you had been nursing since eating a few too many deli meats. “So what kind of feeling do you get from it?” You tilted your head to one side wondering yourself. Blue was usually synonymous with sadness, but that didn’t seem right.

“Curiosity over what happened when you kept my darling brother out for several hours last week.”

You sputtered into another sip and tried not to let your choking fit disturb the other patrons. Leo patted you on the back and after you were able to force oxygen into your lungs once again, you looked up to find him gazing down at you with an self-satisfied grin spread wickedly across his face.  You wanted nothing more than to smack it right off. He'd dangled the bait in front of you all evening and you'd been able to resist. You were so mad at yourself there was little room to be mad at him. Further frustrated by your brain's lack of response, you did the next most petty thing and walked away. You dress shoes pinched your feet from their otherwise disuse.

“Aw, Y/N, come on!” He called after you and you stubbornly inserted yourself amongst a crowd of people surrounding a oozing statue of liberty sculpture. You could feel Leo catch-up, but your humility had yet to do the same. “Don’t be like that. You knew it was coming! It can be difficulty when you’re going up against a number 1 player like myself, but I’m sure by tomorrow you will deeply appreciate how hilarious that was.”

A warped reflection of the blue trickster shrugged in your glass. “But right now…?”

“You are mad, yes I got that.” The crowd dispersed to the next piece and Leo stepped up beside you.

“I thought you made the boundary lines pretty clear about Donnie the last time we talked.” You cradled the glass across your chest to telegraph that you were still closed off.

“Donnie, hm?” You weren’t looking at him, but you could just tell his eye brows were waggling.

You were just annoyed enough that you were able to mentally stomp out any flames of blush that the comment may have otherwise sparked. You had been able to strike up a few, albeit short, text conversation with Donnie since your bao meeting. The purple-themed man had even gone so far as to text you that same night about his family’s response to the food. Needless to say you lost more than a few hours of sleep just trying to get your heart to stop beating uncontrollably out of your chest.

Even though you were now only silent out of contemplation, Leo still took it as a cue to drop that particular part of the subject and return to the matter as a whole. “Fine, D is his own person! Yes, you got me! I said that, but that doesn’t mean I’m not super curious about the little impromptu date you went on!”

“It wasn’t-!”

He held up a hand to stop you. “Phrasing, don’t get to tied up in it.” He waved the hand off as if the stop signal he’d given was too serious. “I’m not saying he’s as pure as freshly fallen snow, but people don’t catch his fancy as much as things and nerd stuff do.” Leo shrugged his shoulders as if it was a silly uncontrollable fact of the universe. “So what if we don’t focus on him or the content, but maybe what you did?”

“I didn’t do anything…” You finally offered him a side glance out of how absurd the question was. He was acting like you had duped his brother somehow.

“Come on!” You hadn’t realized you were wearing Leo’s nerves thin until he actively starting to unravel. His knees buckled and his shoulders slumped down until his hands almost touched the floor. “You have to give me something. I thought you were just going to ask for his number!?”

His youthful dramatics were cute so far as it brought out the kid side of him that was far more manageable. “I asked him to go eat first is all.”

“Donnie isn’t really the one of us you can bait with food…” Still crumpled over, Leo narrowed his eyes at you.

“I don’t know what else to tell you.” It was your turn to mimic his earlier cosmically unhelpful shrug. “It’s the truth.”

Leo was uncharacteristically quiet for awhile. You lowered your drink barrier and turned to look at him. He was staring at some black and white photographs. His brow had the slightest crease in it. Just as you were about to ask, you saw his lips part instead.

“So crush, infatuation, or something else?” He was slow to turn to you for your response.

The significance of the question created a mental blowback so strong your whole frame shifted. He turned to stare and his gaze was so intense that you dropped yours to the floor. Your dress shoes shone back at you. You knocked them together at the toes ever so slightly.

“I’m still not sure.”

“Take you time…” You could hear a movement of Leo’s jacket as he presumably turned away from you. “But don’t take too long. Donnie is smart, but he’s also just as dumb as the rest of us in a lot of ways. Don’t even think about hurting him.”

“I would never!” Your gaze snapped up to meet Leo’s back. “Not intentionally… at least…”

“That’s what I’m worried about.”

Your hands fisted at your sides, but Leo did his characteristic mental 180 and bounded back into his bubbly self as a carter came out with a new tray of canapés.

-

Stumbling out onto the street, the darkened sky disoriented you. Hadn’t the clock rolled over to morning. You took a few weary steps before leaning against a wrought iron fence. You used the brick they were built off of to sit your backpack down. It took some fishing, but you unearthed your phone from between your textbooks and notepads to find the time around 5am; just long enough from sunrise where the sky hadn’t reflected the oncoming dawn. Both yours and your phone’s batteries where lethally low. You sighed and packed your things back up, wrapping your coat tightly around you. Your late night cram session turned video game night had run so far over that you had no hope of getting back to your apartment for any sleep before you’d need to be on your way to your morning class. You made it several steps down the sidewalk as the loaming burden of today’s test seemed as dark as the ocean above. You needed to reorient.

The street was empty so you led a leisurely pace and closed your eyes to check your most pressing needs based on importance. The omnipresent sleep was out of the questions so you shoved that top notification to the side. In its place a new item appeared in the form of caffeine. Opening your eyes and seeing you’d made it a good way down the road without running into anything meant your luck was faring well. An energy drink this early was not something your stomach would tolerate so that meant sustenance was on the menu also. At this hour and on your current budget, you could hit a cheap coffee shop. Some of your facilities returned to you as a streetlight glowed overhead. It would also be a great place to charge your phone. Walking with more purpose now that you had a plan, the next hurdle appeared instantly: without your phone you couldn’t look up the closest or cheapest shop.

You paused, doing a minor heel turn to look up and down the street. This wasn’t an area you were really familiar with. The study group had been hosted by a classmate you’d only met this semester. After brains were thoroughly stuffed with knowledge, the video games had come out. The others, weaker to sleep, had filed out on by one until only you and the host were left. They’d ushered you out, bleary eyed, and were presumably already unconscious which meant so going back for directions was out of the question. Another breathy sigh and you resumed your trudging. You’d have to find somewhere the old fashioned way. You let instinct lead you, turning corners whenever you felt like it. On one particular street, there seemed to be a two or three people mingling down the block. You carved your path outward toward the street and saw there was some sort of break between building rows. It was the most promising lead you’d had so far. If nothing else, you could try to ask the people for directions.

Reaching the break you slowed as everything took on a dream-like quality. Lights were strung all around a plaza bathing it in a golden hue. Cute café table sets were tucked into one side and two open mini food trucks were operating out of the opposite end. The brick inlay of the space shifted outwards from a center point into a mesmerizing swirled pattern.  You stepped along a row watching the way your shoes followed the lines. It brought a smile to your face which was made all the brighter when you realized one of the trucks was serving coffees, teas, and pastries. You resisted the urge to run, but only succeeding in instead speed walking your way over.

There was a man hunched over with his back turned to you in the truck. It gave you time to nervously check their hand drawn chalkboard. You were pleasantly surprised to find the prices were reasonable the limited menu seemed tasty.

“Can I help you?”

You turned to him and started off your order with a warm drink. He commiserated on the ever approaching winter. When you ordered your pastry next he offered to warm it up and that could not have sounded any better. You thanked him and paid before remembering something else needed a pick-me-up also.

“This probably sounds ridiculous because we’re literally outside, but do you have a place where I could charge my phone?”

The man chuckled between grinding coffee beans. “You’d think we wouldn’t, but we actually have one outdoor outlet.” He wiped his hands on a cloth before pointing to the café tables. “Though it looks like someone’s using it so you’ll have to share.”

Following his finger and throwing a gratitude over your shoulder, you felt time slow. The only person in the seating area looked ethereal under the twinkling lights. His head was tipped down, but his purple hoodie was unmistakable. One of your hands moved up to your face and you pinched your cheek hard, wincing at the sharp sting. You couldn’t believe it was real. You crossed the bricked space and approached Donatello.

“Mind if I use the charger too?” It felt like an out of body experience.

“Knock yourself out, I’m only using one plug.”

He hadn’t noticed yet, that was somehow even better. You slowly set your bag on the table to fish out both your phone and charger. It took a little longer than it should have because your eyes were glued to him. He was hunched over and oddly enough, not on his phone for once. He was a bit too shaded to see, but it almost seemed like he his eyes were closed. Leaning over the table to where the socket was, you plugged your phone in.

“Wait… Y/N?” You wondered what had finally tipped him off.

“Hey, Donnie.” You smiled at him, straightening up.

“This is…” He straightened his posture and looked at you with a cocked neck. “How did you know I was here?”

“I didn’t.” You smiled, zipping your bag up.

“I need to work out the exact calculations, but I can assure you that the odds of us running into each other outside of our respective neighborhoods in a city with a population of a little over 9 million is extremely high. There must be some kind of outside interference.” He tugged on the edges of his hoodie to cover the exposed parts of his legs.

“Trust me, I thought I dreamed you for a second.” You shook your head and took your bag from off the table.

“Does that mean you dream of me often? Your psyche better be doing me justice.” His monotone delivery didn’t read flirt, but the contents of the sentence had you swooning.

“Hm, maybe someday you can read my dream journal.” You muttered, looking back to the coffee stand.

“Ah, so you also keep a log of your dreams? There’s no exact science to it yet, but I feel as though sometime in the near future we can learn a great deal about how long-term memory is utilized in the dreamscape.” He held out a hand of glory. “Someday the future generation will look back on the data of Donatello Hamato as the greatest scholar of his time. Also, I will definitely be remembered for the presumable number of Nobel prizes I’ve been awarded.” Creating an L-shape between his thumb and first finger, he brought it to his chin as he devilishly imagined his illustrious future.

You had meant the journal bit as a joke, but you adored that he took it seriously. It didn’t keep you from being sarcastic about the rest. “Speaking of dreams…”

“I consider myself a scientist foremost and a realist after that. I've simply stated a given!”

“Ah to be young!” You crooned, shouldering you bag like it was far too heavy.

“Another unknown, I might be older than you.” He pointed out both literally and figuratively. You both shared your respective birthdays and he cackled. “I’ve got you beat!”

“Fine, but only someone with youth on their side would be out dressed like that in this weather.” You pointed down to the green branching out from between purple coverage.

The look on his face soured instantly and you debated retracting your statement. Instead he clicked his tongue and gestured for you to take a seat. You took the one across from him and could feel some sort of story coming on. “So the lair lost power and I was given not a second of peace while I alone was tasked with the repair. Unable to take the constant barrage of 'when will it be done, Donnie?' and 'what happened to the backup generator, Donnie?' nonsense any longer, I told them I needed some air. I was just going to take a walk and start anew, preferably with some music to drown them out, but my precious phone was about to die.” He groaned and wiped a hand down his face. He then reached for a drink cup that had been otherwise left forgotten. The moment he lifted it a pathetic whine struggled it's way up his throat. In an act of pure frustration, he crushed the apparently empty cup in hand. “Great! Just great!!”

“Order up!”

You gripped the table, torn between getting your much needed drink and leaving an obviously distraught Donnie behind.

“Just-" He didn’t have the energy for further words and waved you off.

“I’ll be right back!” You pressed before heading over to pick up your breakfast. Your backpack thumped against your back as you gave a meager jog to the counter. You slowed on approach, passing the chalkboard sign which gave you an idea. “Uh, can I do a last minute addition?”

“Sure! What’ll it be?” The man anchored an arm to the counter, ready. You leaned in as if it were a secret and placed the order with a hushed tone. Thankfully the barista was game and leaned into the demonstration himself. When you were done, he glanced across the plaza and pointed at Donatello. “For him?”

“Yes.” You bobbed your head.

A laugh bubbled up in the man, but he seemed to remember the classified nature of the order and cleared his throat. “That’s perfect. I love it.” You paid and he gave you a beaming smile. “Wait right there and I’ll whip it right up.”

You did as you were told with only a few nervous glances back at Donnie. The man was in a purple heap and thankfully didn’t seem to be going anywhere. You were glad you’d forgotten to take your backpack off when you had sat down.

“Here we go!” Instead of the to-go cup that both your drink and Donnie’s previous had been in, the man handed you a tall glass with a matching stirring spoon. You gawked at it in amazement. “Hurry and get it over to him before it mixes. Oh, and I’m sure you will, but be careful with the glass. We’re not actually supposed to give those out to the customers, but I figured this was a special occasion.” He punctuated his sentence with a wink and you felt almost weepy at the kindness this man bestowed upon you.

Juggling your order and the delicate cup, you brought it back over to the table. Donnie’s head was down and folded into his arms. Ypu struggled with a tinge of guilt over the fact that you were grateful for it. Hoping the reveal would at least make up for it, you steeled yourself. “Donnie…” You urged, carefully setting the glass down in front of him.

“Hrm?” He grumbled from underneath his layers. “It’s best if you just leave me. I might as well try again tomorrow.”

“Then I have bad news for you about the time.” You couldn’t keep the airy tone out of your voice. His dramatizations were too much.

“Don’t tell me it’s sunrise already!?” He raised his head and froze. His eyes widened at the concoction in front of him. In the glass was a steaming, cascading mix of rich golden coffee and purple cream. “What…?”

“It’s an ube latte.” You smiled and carefully took a seat. Setting your bag aside, you palmed your cup to warm your hands and watched as Donnie uncurled out of his ball. He gave the drink a stir with stick and you took your first delicious sip of your caffeinated beverage.

“It is my color…” He remarked with a sense of fondness. You nodded and resisted the urge to scarf down your whole pastry. The mix of food, drink, and Donnie’s rising spirits warmed your body.

He grasped the glass and took a sip. “Hmmm.” He then acted as if he were a sommelier, twirling the liquid and sniffing it between small tastings. “It’s a bit sweet for my tastes, but the nuttiness pairs really well with the espresso.”

“As long as you don’t hate it, that’s a win for me!” You nodded, just finishing off the last flaky bite.

“It’s not your responsibility to cheer me up.” Cradling the cup in a similar way for warmth, he continued to sip the beverage.

“Is that what I did? I was just thinking purple goes with purple.” You gave him a catlike grin and took a long luxurious swig of your ever emptying drink.

“I would like to reinstate the line of questioning about this being a set-up.” He pointed at you and there was an air of playfulness to the otherwise staunch delivery that was not lost on you.

“Damn, I knew the barista wouldn’t be able to keep his mouth shut.” You snapped your finger in frustration and both of you chuckled.

Several moments of silence passed before Donnie gave a long winded sigh. “I believe I left off when I was about to lose my phone?” His brows hung heavy with effort.

“That’s right, but you don’t have to get into it if you don’t want to.”

He shook his head. “I like to finish what I start.” He leaned back in his chair and took the latte with him. “So I change course for the nearest cafe and catch a glimpse of orange which means I was definitely followed!”

In rapt attention it occurred to you that must mean his other siblings were also color coded. It seemed like it should be obvious seeing as how the only one you knew was too, but it somehow wasn’t.

“I catch up to Mikey and he says he was just worried about me, but he’s a terrible liar.” Donnie rolled his eyes. “His phone goes off and after a short grapple for the device, I find that the others are using him as a gauge to see when I had ‘calmed down’ and to give an ‘eta when the power would be back on.’” You were impressed that he was able to inject so much anger into air quotes. “Like that’s all I’m good for! They act like my emotions are just a hindrance when they pop up because I usually don’t have them!”    

Your eyes widened. That was a particularly loaded sentence. You wanted to interject to reassure him that it had never crossed your mind that he didn’t have emotions, but interrupting him didn’t seem right either.

“Cue a long winded chase where Raph and Leo came topside in pursuit and…” Donnie rolled a wrist in demonstration before flattening out for the finale. “Needless to say I lost them since it’s been… Oh.” He smacked the hand to his forehead. “I had asked about the time?”

Waking your phone up, your read off the number. “It’s almost 6am.”

“I lost them about two and a half hours ago, so I would rate it as a pretty successful escape.” He took a long swig of his drink, almost finishing it off. “Since I ran out, I didn’t have time to throw on pants as I would have if I had known I was going to be stuck out in the cold for so long.” The weight of the story lightened into his characteristic dry tone.

Finishing off your drink, you ruminated over the tale as Donnie continued to recuperate. The words ‘lair’ and ‘topside’ were jumping out to you as particularly strange. Were they a family of super villains? They didn’t seem like it, but it was such a strange word choice. You really wished you knew what they did for a living. As you came out of your thoughts, you watched Donnie chug the rest of his latte and give a long breathy exhale that seemed to blow out his concerns.

“I did not yet thank you for this.” He set the glass down with the stirrer tinkling from the movement. “Still too sweet overall, but I suppose one could say it was ‘just what I needed.’” He put on a different voice for the quote and you wondered who he was mimicking. “Though to be more accurate there were many factors that improved my current mood.” He paused, his lip pursed before eyeing you. “If you did track me, you picked a very good time to reveal your location. To reiterate: thank you.”

Oh how you wished you had any liquid left in your cup to justify hiding behind it. “Any time!” You were torn between upholding the gesture and playing your skipping heart beat off with a joke. “My sensors are specifically tuned for when Donnie is in distress.” Your mouth jumped ahead of both your brain and heart. You wanted to bang your head against the table.

Donnie, on the other hand, smiled softly. “That might be something I should consider adding to my repertoire.” He tapped his device and made a quick note with nimble fingers especially considering how many he had.

“Are you saying you track your brothers?” You wondered through a laugh. This meeting might have charged you up just as much as your breakfast had.

“Nooo…” He drew out the word and looked left to right with narrowed suspicion. "I definitely do no such thing."

That was not convincing in the slightest, but also seemed to absurd to be a real thing. It wouldn't keep you from teasing him for it though. “And you said Mikey…?” You really hoped you had gotten that name right. “Was the a bad liar?”  

“Yes, Mikey, but otherwise, I don’t care to know what you mean!” He retorted, folding his arms. Pale hues started to color the sky. You saw them as you craned back, enjoying the moment.

“I have a mid-term in just over an hour.” You told the single streaked cloud above.

“I’m sorry, what?!” Donnie banged the table with a sudden jolt and the glass cup tipped violently. Slow motion horror spread across your face as your brought uour gaze back down only to see the cup suddenly right itself before your eyes.

“Wh-“ You muttered in disbelief, raising a hand to feebly point at the action.

“No!” He ordered, pointing his own finger in a more accusatory manner. “We’ve been focused on me this whole time when I should have been questioning you! Why are you up so early? You look like you haven’t slept at all! You’re going to take a test in this state? Where’s your academic honor!? Did you even study?!”  

You stared back at him weakly. The ever growing light overhead was certainly not helping the bags under your eyes, but all you could think about was how much he must value education. That and he apparently had the reflexes of a ninja.

“If you aren’t going to answer me then get up. Up!” He flung his arms in time with the command, picking up his glass and standing himself.

You scrambled to follow suit while gathering your trash. “In my defense, I was up all night studying.” You would just leave out the gaming part out for the time being. It was something you could consider texting him as a fun teasing surprise after your class.

“An all-nighter?” He seemed utterly revolted as he strode over to the drink truck where a line was starting to form.

After watching him deposit the glass, you pouted and turned your head away as he approached. “I’m hearing a lot of lecture from the guy who is also awake… What did you say you were doing? Electrician work?”

His inhale was so sharp he almost whistled. “How dare you!? Tradespersons have honorable professions, but my arsenal includes so much more that comparing what I do to a single line of work is utterly disgraceful!” You walked out of the plaza together, but the indignity was too much for him. He rounded you and pressed a finger right to your forehead. “Apologize to me while I’ll still accept it!”

The best you could do was crinkle your overjoyed smile.

“And stop smiling! Why are you even smiling?!”

If only he knew how lucky you counted yourself.

💜 NEXT 💜

[tigressaofkanjis]

I just realized Asmodeus has a clown kink and it extends to Mammon. Notice at the beginning he's kind of saddened when he says "Mammon doesn't do clown shit anymore." This is kind of suspicious to me. We all can figure Fizz's breakdown outright states he wouldn't have met Asmodeus had Mammon not introduced them.

So, I have a theory...

From Beelzebub's comment on Satan being hot despite the Sins sometimes finding their counterparts like siblings (not actual thankfully), it implies some of the Sins definitely hooked up being as high of a power as they are. Why would Asmodeus be intertwined with Mammon so heavily to be doing such deals and encountering his clowns on a regular basis? I think they are exes. That's where the clown kink comes in.

Mammon used to do "clown shittery" and it was a turn on to Ozzie because it also made him laugh (the Jessica Rabbit clause but with actual sex involved), so they dated and all the fun stuff in between. But as time went on, Asmodeus became a stickler for consent of lust when he realized Mammon was using him as a trophy boyfriend, to brag about having a hot Sin at his pleasure like the greedy asshole he is. This obviously didn't fly well with Asmodeus who fell out with Mammon. Of course, Mammon wouldn't let go of anything that he wants.

While they were together in their final year, Mammon at some point introduced his star, Fizzarolli, around the same time he himself stopped doing his clown act to use Fizz as a scapegoat for his greed instead finding it easier for him. Asmodeus found the clown imp funny and managed to convince Mammon to spend some time with Fizz. At first it was out of lust but it started developing into something more, a real love Asmodeus never knew he needed and Mammon could never give. Once he broke up with Mammon, they then struck a deal that Mammon wouldn't say a word about Asmodeus' secret love with Fizzarolli nor take the break up harsh if the latter agreed to make Mammon money through sex toys and other robots (because there's no way in Hell Mammon built his own).

Deep down though, especially through the chin stroke and pet names they exchanged in the new episode, I think Mammon is not just angry at losing his star, he's on a warpath to completely destroy them because he just lost what he wanted. Greed can make people do terrible things and he wanted both of them for different purposes. Without either Fizzarolli or Asmodeus, Mammon's desire will consume him to the point where if he can't have what he wants, he'll get rid of them so no one else can have them...not even each other.

Which sets up an amazing villain arc. Granted, I don't think it will be canon in the show that Asmodeus and Mammon used to be a thing. It will be explained of Mammon's closeness with Asmodeus as it's more of a friendly rivalry/chaotic sibling energy type thing but I don't know...I just don't see it. I think there's another story to be told about those two and I can't wait to know it. For now, I can only speculate the little gestures and my mind goes places. Sorry.

[lemonofthevalley]

my dad made up an older sister of mine named morgan and its heavily implied that my dad killed her when she was 5 because she was misbehaving (before i was born) (my parents were married for 3 years before i was born and would NEVER have a child out of wedlock so thats how i know she wasnt real). if we ever bring up morgan in public my mom gets very embarrassed because one time we actually convinced someone that we had an older sibling who died

on a similar note my sisters and i have made up this Amy that both of my parents are seeing . its not the same amy but it could be any of the amys my parents know (theres like 15 of them my parents know a lot of amys). basically amy is a stand in for "hey i need to go to the store" and we're like "oh so youre seeing amy? how's amy doing?" . my mom hates it (shes very against polyamory sadge) but my dad plays into it its hilarious

ANYWAYS. rbs appreciated i want to know if this is just a me+my family thing

[inbetweenhours]

Evo Sibling Childhood Timeline

Okay official post for the siblings from THIS post, featuring my mcyt superpower au that I really need a better name for.

Below the cut I have explained the timeline of the siblings from childhood through to the (near) present of the au. Some CWs are bolded with it, and it’s really long lol. I the interested enjoy :]

Quick CWs: Death (3 accounts: 1 parental death and 2 teen murders) mentioned/implied neglect and abuse (non descriptive), lots of abandonment, being on the run/wanted by police

These CWs are major plot points in the timeline, but they also aren’t described in depth. 

Enjoy!

Lizzie, Grian, Pearl, and Jimmy are siblings in this au, the lot of them. Though to be clear they do not all have the same parents. Grian and Pearl are full siblings, their dad cheated on their mom with Lizzie's mom who had her and Jimmy. Jimmy and Lizzie's mum died, and they were both taken in by Pearl and Grian's parents, raising them all as siblings. Their mom is pissed but didn't go to divorce because she doesn’t believe in it.  Instead the kids are all being raised together with varying levels of love from their parents.

They grow up pretty close since their parents suck. Even Grian and Pearl who arguably get the most love from their parents are fairly used to a level of neglect and frustration from them. Their parents deliberately do not like Jimmy and Lizzie. Jimmy gets a lot of shit for being the "reason" they're all stuck together, partially blamed for his mothers death because his birth complicated her health. As well as his unidentified luck powers getting him in all sorts of trouble. 

Lizzie is older and feels like an outsider. She does not want this family, she had a family before it was taken from her. She loves Jimmy to bits but she kind of hates it here and it only gets worse. Lizzie gets heavily parentified as the eldest girl and constantly gets into fights with the mum. They fight all the time basically and Lizzie takes it upon herself to take care of her siblings, especially Jimmy who is fairly neglected compared to the others. 

Besides the stuff with their parents though the siblings all relatively get alone, as much as sibling can with a big change. They generally have each others back hiding blame and taking care of one another. Teasing and rough play are to be expected but they’ll sooner cover for each other and love one another than else.

Next block of time is best associated with the Bad Boys (Grian, his classmate Joel, and Jimmy) who decide their town in the middle of nowhere really needs some alert heroes and takes it upon themselves to become a teen vigilante group since they're not old enough to be legal heroes. 

This immediately gets them in trouble because they're 3 dipshit teenaged nuisances causing trouble around town and given Grian and Joel are more than a little destructive, eventually they cause some damage that gets a hero called in. The Codfather catches their ragtag group quickly and they all get in trouble. 

Joel and Grian are sent off to a boarding school a town over, closer to one of the cities surrounding them but ultimately pretty isolated from civilization. It’s meant to straighten out their delinquent behaviour, a school for poorly behaved children. To right them into good members of society.

Jimmy gets a slap on the wrist because he's younger enough the other two can take the blame for him. He’s also clearly much more upset and apologetic about the ordeal than the teenagers ar. Even when The Codfather and other officials try to assure him they aren’t in too much trouble. There’s consequences, but they’re kids.

At home things are tense because alongside Grian being sent away there's now infrequent eyes on the house meant to keep an eye on Jimmy.  They’re not terribly attentive, not super concerned tbh, but they check in once in a while. But it’s unnerving the parents who we all know aren't being that great of parents. Especially to Jimmy specifically. 

Lizzie is really pulling her weight during these check ins to keep things together. She is also getting weary of  having to hold things together. To be a fucking mom when she's supposed to be a sister. She’s tired of trying to wrangle these people who are feeling a bit like she's overbearing at times even if she means well. Lizzie is getting more stressed under pressure, Pearl and Jimmy are getting annoyed with her hovering, and frankly its damaging their relationship.

She is getting exasperated, as well as having had a BIG fuck up with the mom after a fight with her gets her ends with her discovering her powers for the first time. Able to transform into this aquatic beast. It scares both her and her mom enough that they just entirely start avoiding each other and do not talk about it. No one else knows what happened, and Lizzie has no one to talk to about it since Jimmy’s powers havent been identified and both Grian and Pearls powers don't seem like much on anything to their parents because they havent really figured them out fully. More of a light show than anything so Lizzie being able to become this monster is freaky to everyone and especially herself. Especially in their small town where there’s not a lot of other people to base her powers from.

Shit hits the fan when Lizzie turns 18. She thought long and hard in the months leading to her birthday,  subtly packing her few belongings. Finally, after spending the day with her siblings, she disappears that night alongside her things. She decided she couldn’t take it anymore, being in that house. Didn’t want anything to do with their parents, and with a heavy heart, deciding she just couldn’t say anything to her siblings either. They wouldn’t understand, they’d beg her to stay. And she just can’t stay. They’re dependent on her and she just can’t stand taking care of anyone but herself anymore. 

The only thing she left behind was a note to Jimmy, apologizing for leaving but with little other details. It’s enough for a missing persons report to not be bothered with. She’s 18 after all. She's guilty after years of taking care of her siblings and being there for them and she does love them but she just, made a big hard decision and left without contact. She doesn't want to be found. She wants a fresh start. She plans to reach back out when she’s ready, because she really does love them. She just has a life to get on with first. She has a new job and an apartment lined up. She's doing as well as she can really despite the guilt. 

Grian is having the opposite of a good time after hanging out with his two friends he met at the boarding school takes a turn. In their dorm the aggression amps past its normal threats and Taurtis is killed. In retaliation, for fear of his life, Grian kills Sam and knows there's not a chance in hell the police look at this school of delinquent boys and believes Grian did this in self defense. He knows that, believes so firmly he’ll be in trouble without defense.

So he runs, through woods and along highway. Its a miracle he wasn't caught, likely only so because they wouldn't have imaged he'd get out of the countryside town and all the way to Hermitopia. He's on the run from here out. He manages to steal a stupid Halloween chicken mask that he uses to hide his face while he steals shit, becoming an almost endearingly iconic local villain that everyone finds a little annoying but isn't actually being dealt with because he's such a low necessity to be dealt with by heroes he gets away with stealing what he needs to survive in the city. RIP the annoyed locals but there’s like 2 whole rising villain factions in their city that have priority.

 News of Grians disappearance and believed involvement with the murders reaches home. Joel had personally managed to get a letter back, he was the one to discover the crime scene after all. He assures Pearl and Jimmy he doesn’t think Grian did it, no matter what the evidence looks like or the police say. He just doesn’t believe it.

Jimmy and Pearl are... not doing great after Lizzie left. Jimmy is distraught, Lizzie was his person y’know? Loves his whole family but Lizzie was his rock and his only parent figure (which was kind of the whole problem but still, she's all Jimmy had). He doesn’t now what to do with himself, already poor self esteem plummeting because he has to assume its his fault. He’s at his worst place with little ways out.

Pearl is feeling pretty well abandoned and has begun lashing out. Lizzie left a note for Jimmy and not her. Her full brother is missing, and their household is a wreck because neither youngest really had to be the responsible one before. They're have  each other at least. It’s the only rock they can hold onto anymore, each other. They’re attached at the hip during this time, reaching blindly for each other with everything seeming to fall apart around them.

Next big jump has the siblings all established in their adult lives a bit better.

Lizzie met Joel who also moved to Empire City after he graduated. Neither he or Lizzie talk about their history in much depth and don't push each other on it, more than happy to keep all that behind them. Lizzie doesn’t exactly want to be associated with her family she cut contact with, and Grian doesn’t feel like telling the pretty girl he’s with that he was stuck in a boarding school that housed a double murder.

Because of this they don't realize they Joel was the dipshit who got Lizzie's brothers in trouble/ Lizzie is the older sister of Joel’s old friends. They fall in love,  move in together, and get married. It’s a small wedding, honestly considering if they just eloped because neither had much family or friends to invite. Lizzie had tried to reach out to her siblings around this time I imagine, feeling secure enough to do so. But was met with dead ends when she called her parents old number. She was guilty and upset, but ultimately couldn’t do much for now.

Life goes on, and seems to really be going up for the both of them after such rough year getting here. Lizzie has established herself working at a pawn shop of sorts, mostly scamming people in the closest way you can get to legality and its working out well for her. Joel doesn't work as consistently, becoming an artist and doing commissions, but Lizzies the one supporting them mostly. They're happy!

Grian is also happy, or at least- happier. He's still in a rough spot but he met a friend after so many years alone and paranoid on the run. Mumbo, young rich tech enthusiast and also vigilante I’ve yet to find a name I like for, found Grian!  The two became friends. Mumbo offered to let Grian live with him, and after thorough convincing he wasn't about to get turned into the police (Mumbo wouldn't, he's a vigilante  he isn't exactly liked by the law either and Grian knows enough to get him in trouble) Grian agrees to move in and mooch off him. 

Mumbo’s pretty rich it hardly makes a dent to him, and now he has a buddy to help him with his morally grey bullshit and show his tech too! Even if Grian has no idea what the hell he's talking about. Grian takes up his villain alias as Watcher, a more serious alias compared to his silly survival stint as Poultryman. He and Mumbo do some grey bordering on villainous activity.  

Grian is pretty well angry at the world now that he's physically in a better place and isn’t scared for his life every day. He's angry with the justice system he has seen the wrong side of one too many times and takes it out by targeting heroes, police, and government buildings. Really just making a spectacle of destroying and fighting and trying to use up all this anger he has no idea what to do with. 

He’s also, frankly, fucking bored now that he isn’t fighting to stay alive every day. And really that’s the worse crime of all. Thankfully he's not too keen on killing people after Sam, yknow getting him into this whole mess and being hella traumatizing.  And anything leaning a bit more morally ill advised Mumbo tends to balance him out so all is going about as well as it could on his end considering he's wanted under 3 different alias' for various different crimes.

Pearl is... doing the worst of her siblings. After Grian disappeared and Lizzie left the authorities that had been monitoring Jimmy took a more keen interest. They had been mostly asking the family about Grian after assuming his hand in the murders. However without Lizzie there to take care of things the household was looking a lot worse for wear compared to previous check ins. Soon enough Pearl and Jimmy were quickly removed from their parents household thanks to the neglect.

Pearl was convinced they'd be okay if only they stayed together. Jimmy left though, offered stability by the hero who caught him all those years ago, The Codfather, and taking him in. Pearl felt betrayed that Jimmy would do this to her, feeling completely abandoned she was told she could go into care or, since she's 16, she can technically get a job and look out for herself with some financial support and check ins till she’s 18. 

She took that option, refusing to chase after people who keep leaving. Putting her family behind her angrily and moving to Hermitopia where she thought she'd be farthest away. She found her dog Tilly abandoned in an ally and took her in. She was left behind, just like Pearl was after all. She managed to get herself a job as a garbage lady after some years of working minimum wage and is now a very unstable adult with a fairly stable job and place in society from all outside perspectives. 

She is the only one of her family have any knowledge where the others are, as in she knows Jimmy is The Canary. Outside of this no one knows anyone else alt. identities much less where they all are.

Finally Jimmy, as previously mentioned, was sought out by The Codfather who had been keeping tabs on the family since the delinquency stint. He hadn't thought, just reached for someone that believed in him. Could help him. He admired heroes, its why he and Grian had that vigilante stint at all. 

He hadn't really thought he'd be leaving Pearl behind. Had thought she would come with, or they would stay in touch and still hang out and be siblings. It wasn't till she disappeared, like Lizzie and Grian before her, not even a note this time in her anger. Jimmy lost the last thread of his family, and turned entirely to rely on The Codfather as a mentor and father figure. 

The man was kind with Jimmy and  genuinely the best thing to ever happen to him. He helped Jimmy identify his powers, realizing the poor luck he's had was a product of not knowing how to regulate the intentions of his powers and ending up breaking things as a result. He helped set Jimmy on a better path, and Jimmy took up training as his Sidekick when he turned 18. Wanting to be like the hero who has helped him the most.

Finally nearest to the present are only some minor updates from last. 

Lizzie and Joel were both interested in vigilante justice, and frankly, the fame of heroism. However they knew they couldn't legally become heroes with their pasts. Joel's history in a school for delinquents and Lizzie with familial relations to Grian that would surely bring up things she doesn't want to be associated with. 

Instead they both decide to get in on the vigilante thing, crafting identities as Lady of the Deep and The Mad King. They're frankly not actually bad at heroics. A bit chaotic and show off-y, but they work pretty peacefully alongside the legal heroes and thus are a low enough threat that they're rarely targeted by the law. Legal heroes have bigger things to deal with than imposters doing more good that bad. 

Besides, civilians kinda love them they're iconic lol, even if a bit grey sometimes. They certainly aren’t free of crime, sticking their noses places they shouldn’t be in their personal pursuits. Joel hasn’t ever gotten over the murder he discovered, or Grians disappearance, and he’s always on the look out for leads others could have missed. He wants his friend back, and he wants to prove his innocence. Lizzie is also looking out for Pearl and Jimmy rather passivly, never able to get an answer on where they’d gone.  

Jimmy's role as the Codfathers sidekick comes to an end. I'm not entirely sure if the Codfather dies, maybe in the same fight as Aeor (other hero, big plot event, story for another time) or if he's just old and retires. Might just let the guy retire because Jimmy deserves good things. 

Doesn't matter, Jimmy moves from sidekick to full fledged hero with the Codfather’s good word as well as his years of work as a sidekick. He's a fan favourite, especially since he mainly deals in civilian support. he isn't much good for a fight but he's decent at corralling people and defense, keeping people safe. he feels fulfilled following in his mentors footsteps and especially in helping people.

 Pearl goes off the deep end. Watching from a distance as news of The Codfather and The Canary’s fame and heroics escalates. Not only that but Hermitopia is ripe with like 3 non hero factions and at this point she's bored as hell and just wants to cause a bit of havoc. Honestly still angry with the world and wanting to rip it apart a bit for the way it has left her behind over and over.

She ends up messing with 2 different villain factions, one in each city. But that's more for present day plots. At least she finds herself finally feeling at home, like she has actual friends again after so long. It’s hit or miss between factions, she just wants a place to belong again really and keep striking out. One day, someone will stick. She’ll get her ride or die soon enough!

Finally, Grian is taken into interest by famed cocky ass show-pony of a hero, Hotguy! They get into a bit of a rivalry that Grian finds himself really getting into. For the first time in years he has a project of his own as he painstakingly puts together a new villain identity as Cuteguy, the antithesis to Hotguy. Hotguy thinks its hilarious, absolutely adores the publicity of their rivalry and its more a performance thing than anything else. 

Rest assured, Grian is still dangerous and willing to get into shit with Mumbo, but honestly this is a peak for him. He feels like he has some control in his life again, is finally having FUN in his life again. Its really as good a spot as he can be in without his many warrants for arrest in all his identities being let up. He has a friend he can rely on in Mumbo, and whatever you would call Scar, and he might dare to say he’s pretty happy, all things considered.

That's everything for the Evo siblings up to near the present of the au There's still stuff I could expect on since the “present” kinda ranges a fair few years in my current notes. 

If anyone wants more answers for anything, related to this or inquiries about other involvements go for it! This is is fairly expansive and while underdeveloped is being worked on :] I hope you all enjoyed reading!

[luckyyluka]

Empty

Steve Harrington x gn!reader

Summary: Reader is at their limit but Steve interrupts their plans for the end. (hurt/comfort fic)

Disclaimer: Technically this is an OC because reader is Dustin's older sibling, but it is intended as a reader insert fic, so I am going to keep it listed as such. However, if you feel like being related to Dustin does not accurately fit you, you are free to interpret this however you'd like. Reader could be adopted, or maybe has a different father. Maybe reader isn't even related, but Dustin's mother kind of took them in when something happened in the past. Reader doesn't have to have the same genetics to be family with Dustin.

Notes: Reader is Dustin's older sibling. Reader uses they/them pronouns. NO use of y/n. I can't even tell you how long this has been in my drafts bro

Credits: gif from @appocalipse , dividers by @cafekitsune

Trigger Warnings: no specific mental illness is mentioned but in a general sense, SEVERE depression is heavily implied. Detailed depictions of depression, self harm, suicidal thoughts, almost attempted suicide using pills (all from reader).

This fic has a fairly detailed moment where reader is cutting themselves. I wrote this originally only for myself as a form of comfort. Please THINK before you decide to read this. The most important thing here is for you to stay safe. The sole purpose of me posting this fic is for readers who are similar to myself that might find comfort in this, but not everybody will get the same thing out of this fic, so please please please do NOT read if this will trigger you in any way.

Empty. The room feels empty. Your heart feels empty. Your hope feels empty. The emptiness pierced through your chest like an arrow, cold and sharp and leaving you breathless. Your tears fall from your face like a flood as you sit on the ever-so-slightly scratchy carpet underneath you, one hand brushing over the fabric, the other playing with the necklace you wore around your neck. The necklace with the guitar pick. Eddie's guitar pick.

Eddie Munson was your best friend since the first grade. He meant the world to you. He helped you through your darkest times, the times when depression would hit too hard, the times you'd feel like you were wasted space in the world around you, the times you got too sick to function, the times you relapsed. He stayed there with you until his last dying breath, a breath that shouldn't have come. It wasn't at all fair that he died saving a town that only ever judged him, outcast him, berated him. It wasn't at all fair that he was gone.

He took that last dying breath only days after he witnessed the gruesome death of Chrissy Cunningham, framed for murder, and tragically stuck in the middle of the most cursed parts of Hawkins, Indiana. You'd been there before. Three times. Starting when your little brother's best friend, Will, disappeared. Dustin snuck around in secret at first, but you knew him well. You knew him better than anyone did, aside from maybe himself, so you figured it all out pretty quickly. And that's the thing about the trust between you two - it made it easy for him to tell you everything when you asked. To trust you to hold him in your arms on the most difficult nights, softly singing the lyrics to Heroes by David Bowie to help soothe him as he would slowly but surely fall asleep. Just like you did when you were younger.

Those three times had left you to mourn the loss of your friend, Barb, your little cat, Mews, and the man that made Joyce Byers smile for the first time in over a year, Bob. And as much as you hated Billy Hargrove - the man that abused his sister, Max Mayfield, made racist remarks about Lucas Sinclair, verbally spat in the faces of anybody he spoke to, and beat Steve Harrington to a pulp - even he had died tragically. Though you were sure it wouldn't have effected you near as much if it weren't for the shattered heart of Max Mayfield - a heart that you and your friends desperately tried to help piece back together - it still left your own heart heavy.

The fourth time around was different, though. As your best friend, you had done everything in your power to protect Eddie from the things you've had the misfortune of witnessing before, even if it created a barrier in the middle of your relationship. But the Upside Down had other plans when a monster named Vecna gave Eddie the burden of witnessing Chrissy shake in a trance, eyes rolling to the back of her head, floating, limbs folding and crunching, eyes sucked into her body. He had no choice but to be a part of it all. Vecna gave him no choice.

The monster got into the minds of anybody who was suffering. He fed off of defeat, distress, heartache... it made him stronger. He tried taking Max, and he almost got her, but Eleven brought her heart back. That didn't change the fact that she did die, though, even if only for a moment. It still gave Vecna that little ounce of power that he needed. The power to open up the rift to the Upside Down, a rift that split Hawkins into quarters... the great "earthquake" of Hawkins, Indiana.

You grieved the loss of Eddie Munson, Chrissy Cunningham, and even basketball player Jason Carver, all while praying desperately to anybody above who would listen that Max would wake up from a coma, miraculously escaping death. You all visited her every single day, none of you dared to leave her alone. Her hospital room, despite being arid and lifeless, was unofficially deemed the spot, all of you gathered there to hang out almost every day as she recovered. You covered the room in posters and knickknacks, left behind toys and board games that you could have simply brought back the next time you came, just to mask the bleak atmosphere. It took half a year, but your prayers were answered, and she did miraculously escape death.

Two years later and her body grows closer and closer to fully healing everyday. Her sight came back faster than her smiles, but eventually, she got those back too.

But the reason for your tears as you sit on the floor in a dark, empty room at this very moment, gripping onto the pick that hung around your neck, wasn't to mourn your best friend Eddie Munson. The pick only helped to nudge a few breaths back into you, reminding you about all of the times Eddie held you in his arms and begged you to keep going, to stay alive, trying desperately to convince you of the truth - that everyone around you loved and needed you here, that you couldn't die, not even if it was at your own hand.

The reason was your mind. The way your thoughts were able to make your heart ache, your body shake, your lungs desperately scratch for air. You felt like you were drowning, and to make things worse, you had no one reason why. It was a mix of everything. Everybody you had mourned in your life, every intrusive thought that had you second guessing reality, every time your mind would flash back to every trauma you've experienced.

You turned on music, started watching tv, writing, dancing, anything to help you to slow your thoughts, make them more bearable. But it didn't work. They just wouldn't stop.

You've coped with this burden for as long as you can remember, Eddie, Dustin and your mother being there for you every step of the way as you were in and out of hospitals, therapy, relapses. When everything with the Upside Down kick-started, you thanked whatever higher being out there that your meds were working like they needed to be. It helped to grow close to the new people around you - Robin, Nancy, Jonathan, Steve, Joyce... Hell, even the little ones, Will, Lucas, Mike, Eleven, and Max. Your support system was strong. You weren't alone. And while it undeniably helped, nothing was cured.

You made it through every time, and you thought that should have helped, that it should have put everything into perspective. You're alive, most of your loved ones are alive, you've got a long list of people surrounding you who understand exactly what you've been through... yet it only made your stomach churn with guilt. Guilt that you had no right to be depressed over anything, not when things like the Upside Down existed, not when there were worse things out there. But you couldn't help it. You didn't understand how you couldn't even bring yourself to get out of bed a lot of times, but your friends were getting out of bed, getting dressed, showering, existing every single day...

You wondered why you couldn't do that. You wondered why your mind worked so hard against you every second you were awake. You wondered why you were still alive and not Eddie. Not Barb. Not Bob. If you can barely exist, so weak, so cowardly, so ungrateful, but they were giving their all every single day, then why were you the one who made it out alive?

It was eating you from the inside out. The guilt. The survivors guilt. The guilt of just simply feeling. The fleeting guilt of hurting your loved ones if you were to die, though it was quickly washed away by the knowledge that it wouldn't matter, that they would be better off without you, that you didn't matter enough for anybody to be effected by your death.

You hadn't talked about how you were feeling in two years. Since Max almost died, that guilt had gotten so severe that you just couldn't bring yourself to let anything out anymore. So you held it in. You held it in until you were about to burst at the seams. And even then, you couldn't seem to allow yourself to let it out.

But now here you were, alone in the empty room you sat in, the spare bedroom of your house. The only room that had a lock on the door. Usually, your mom, Dustin, and you were respectful of knocking, respectful of each other's privacy... but you couldn't risk it. Not right now. On the floor beside you was a Coke can - the classic, not the new kind - next to a bottle of pills, a note you had carefully hand-written, and your pocket knife. You had this planned for weeks now, and you finally reached your limit. It was time to set the plan into action.

Your grip on Eddie's guitar pick tightened, if that were even possible. Your forearm wiped away at your tears, which deemed to be useless when the tears fell far too quickly. The emptiness you had once felt moments ago was suddenly gone, replaced with the weight of a burden much too heavy for you to bear. A burden of existing with a mind so relentless. Reluctantly, you let go of the pick around your neck and grabbed your knife, popping the blade out and sucking in as much of a breath as you could take.

Without thinking, you pushed down. The cold sting on your wrist made you shudder, eyes closing in relief. Feeling the blood trickling down your wrist had urged you to open your eyes, to take in the sight of every emotion you endured being put on display. The breath you held finally escaped your lungs, and for the first time in days, you noticed your breathing begin to even out. As if you weren't drowning anymore, yet simply floating at the surface of the water you were once drowning in only moments ago.

You continue your actions, the crushing heaviness you felt in your lungs lessening with each cut. When you felt satisfied with your work, you let the blood trickle down and make a mess. That was the most satisfying part of it all. The visible mess and what it represented; hey, this pain is real, it's not all in your head.

You sighed, your tears lessened just a bit as your breathing evened out and you felt more at ease. Your shakey hands slowly but surely untwisted the cap of the bottle of pills, fumbling a bit more than you should have - damned safety cap. Nevertheless, you popped it open and poured about a dozen pills into your hand, but before you could wrap your other hand around the coke can next to you, you heard the front door open. Fuck.

"I just need to grab my bag! It has all the walkie talkies."

Dustin.

"Dude is that really necessary?"

Mike.

"Can you two shut up and hurry? We've got places to be!"

Steve, ending his sentence with a clap. He must have been the last to enter because you heard the front door shut shortly after.

You winced at the sound. The sound of your little brother talking, not knowing you were about to end your life in the next room. The sound of your friends, Mike and Steve, mostly unaware of your mental struggles and completely clueless to your current state.

You heard shuffling footsteps and indistinctive murmuring between the three boys. Dustin shut his door and you let out a short breath knowing they were finally about to leave - except they didn't.

"Wait, Dustin, where's your sibling?"

Your breath caught in your throat as you tried to hold back from sobbing at the mention of you. The tears were hard enough to control as it was.

"I don't know, probably with Robin," Dustin shrugged it off and you hoped it'd end with that, but it didn't.

"But their car is still in the driveway," Steve speculated, "plus, Robin's working."

You heard the footsteps growing closer to you, and the door to your room opened. "They're not in here," Dustin said with worry. He called out your name, but of course he didn't get a response. He knew you were at an all time low right now, he saw it every day, so of course his first response would be to worry.

The door knob on the spare room that you were in wiggled. "The spare bedroom is locked!" Dustin called out, frantically fumbling with it.

Little did you know, Dustin had been updating everyone of your struggles. He couldn't bear the weight of it all alone. Plus, they all cared for you. They wanted you to be okay. They missed you. They loved you. So they tried to help in every way possible.

"You don't think they're... like, cut-"

Steve cut Mike's words short, "I got a paper clip. Let me open it," he got closer to the door, "step back with Mike, okay Dustin?"

"Okay," you heard your little brother's voice crack and you could tell he was on the verge of tears. You, however, were way past tears. Your sobs had you almost gasping for air as you tried desperately to hold them back, but you know they'd heard them. Quickly, you reached for the bottle of pills before the door swung open.

"Shit," you whispered when the bottle of pills tumbled over.

Steve was quick to hide you from the kid's line of sight with his body. He looked at you with sad eyes, talking in a breath as you frowned at him with guilt.

He turned around, "wait out here," he instructed the boys and turned to face you. He slowly walked closer before sitting next to you on the ground.

He wrapped his arms around you gently as you finally let yourself cry. Sobs ripped from your chest as the tears flooded, and you knew his shirt was already tear-stained. Steve held you long enough for you to finally catch a breath before he pulled away to assess the current situation.

He gently wrapped his hand around your wrist, maneuvering your arm so that he could see the cuts. "How many did you take?" His eyes scanned the still bleeding cuts as he asked about the pills.

"None," you told him, "the bottle tipped over," you frowned, "I made a mess..."

"My love..." His eyes glossed as tears threatened to fall from the corners of his eyes. "You're okay, don't worry about the mess. Let's just get you cleaned up, alright?"

You shook, more than you were before, as your sobs evened out slowly. Steve stood up, helping you slowly get on your feet, and he guided you to the bathroom.

He helped to pick you up and you sat on the counter, but the movement made you realize just how groggy you were starting to feel. You felt tired - exhausted, even - and almost fell over, but Steve held you up. "I got you, baby. You're okay. Stay awake for me, alright?"

He grabbed a wash cloth and wet it before guiding your arm under the water. He did his best to be gentle with you as he helped to clean your cuts. Finally, he wrapped a towel around your arm, instructing you to hold it there as he searched the medicine cabinet for some bandages.

"Aha," he pronounced when he found the bandage wrap that he was looking for. He got some antibiotic cream and covered your now-clean wounds, wrapping the bandage just tight enough around your wrist to help the bleeding slow down and protect the cuts from worsening.

"There. All clean," he smiled at you as he held your wrist in his hand while his other hand covered yours. You were much too tired to try and fake a weak smile for him.

"Now, do you want to talk? Or would you rather watch some movies or something?" Steve gave you options, and none of them included leaving you alone. "Dustin and Mike are here, too. I can call Robin, Nancy, Jonathan, Max... Anybody you want around. We all talk if you want, or we can order a bunch of pizza and binge your favorite show on Netflix."

He rambled more and more options for you to choose from, proving that he would really do pretty much anything to comfort you in this moment. You sighed, but a real smile actually seemed to form on your lips - albeit small, but it was there.

"I think... I'm really tired, Steve..." you confessed, really only wanting to sleep. Steve frowned a little.

"Let's get you to bed, then," he rubbed circles on the back of your hand soothingly. "I'll let the boys know. They won't mind playing some video games or something while we take a nap."

"We...?" you questioned hesitantly, suddenly feeling a bit nervous, but too tired to care enough.

"If that's alright with you? I'm a little sleepy too," he smiled gently.

You only nodded in response.

He'd assumed you didn't really want to talk to Dustin or Mike right now, and that assumption was correct, so he went to update them on the situation and they both understood.

When Steve returned to the bathroom, he helped you down from the counter and lead you to your room, practically tucking you in. He climbed into the bed next to you and the two of you faced each other.

"I think you're fantastic," he said to you, "and you mean a lot to me. You mean a lot to all of us. Especially Dustin," he smiled. "That boy would die for you in a heartbeat."

You frowned slightly, taking in his words as much as possible as your eyes got heavier. "I'm sorry," you apologized.

"No, love, don't apologize. You've got nothing to be sorry for. Pinky promise."

It was a joke between the two of you. The first time you really spoke to each other, you made him pinky promise to keep his end of a bargain - you buy the drinks and he doesn't talk about his hair for the rest of the week. It was funny, and neither of you expected it to mean anything, but it stuck.

"Okay," you smiled at him.

"There's that beautiful smile," Steve tucked your hair behind your ear, careful not to startle you.

"We need you here," he finally began, "you light up the room every time. You're our light. You're funny and kind. You're amazing. You've gone through so so much. You're allowed to be sad. To cry. But please, talk to us when you need to. Please stay."

Steve's words resonated with you, so much so that a small tear escaped from the corner of your eye. "Okay," you repeated from the last time.

And before he could say anything else, your eyes closed and you were asleep.

With him there, you finally got a genuinely good sleep for the first time in a long while.

When you finally woke up from your nap, Steve wasn't in the bed anymore. You frowned slightly, until you heard his voice bantering with Mike and Dustin's in the living room. A sigh escaped your lips as you rolled out of the bed and headed into the living room.

Dustin was the first to notice, not bothering to pause whatever video game was on the TV as he dashed towards you. His arms wrapped around you immediately, "you're awake!!"

A small smile formed on your lips as you pat his head and hugged him back, "I'm awake."

"I love you so much," Dustin mumbled against your shoulder, tightening his grip on you. "Please stay."

Your hug tightened around him this time before you pulled away and looked into his eyes, "I'm not going anywhere, Dustin."

Mike stared from afar, his attention on you and making sure you were okay had occupied his mind, any attention towards the video game he was playing with Dustin was lost.

Steve made his way over to you, Dustin going back to the couch to let the two of you speak. "How are you feeling?" Steve questioned.

"I don't know," you admitted, "but I finally got some actual sleep for the first time in a while." A weak chuckle escaped your lips.

"That's good..." Steve ran his fingers through his hair, "you know, uh... well, Dustin isn't the only one who really needs you here. I mean, Mike was lost trying to process what had happened... he was terrified. And, well, I..." he stopped himself there, inhaling deeply and averting his eyes from yours to the ground.

His hand rubbed the back of his neck anxiously, his eyes meeting yours again as he continued, "I can't lose you."

Your breath caught in your throat as you studied his eyes and took the time to process what Steve had just told you.

Before you could say anything, he continued his words in a frantic effort to explain himself, "I, uh, I know we weren't ever very close.. I mean, before I started hanging out with your brother, I was... kinda a shitty dude," he let out a breathy chuckle, "and you were so shy, you hung out with Eddie, who didn't exactly get along with my clique, and..." he paused, letting out a deep sigh before continuing his ramble, "what I mean to say is, letting Dustin drag me to your house that night to help him explain all of this upside down shit to you... Well, it led me to you, so..."

You raised an eyebrow at him, the corner of your lips curved upwards, fully understanding what he was saying, but teased him anyways. "So....?" You pushed for him to finish what he was saying.

"So, I guess maybe I should thank the little shit," a breathy laugh escaped his lips as he joked with you.

You giggled quietly and put both of your hands on either side of his face, locking eye contact with him. Judging by the way your cheeks burned, the blush on your face was prevalent, you were sure. His left hand went to your waist, pulling you in a little closer as his right hand gently curved around the back of your neck.

"Can I kiss you?"

You nodded in response, "Yes," you whispered.

He leaned down and brought his lips to yours, kissing you slowly. He had to force himself to break the kiss before he was in too deep to stop, the closed-lip, dopey smile on his face as he looked at you would have made you think that he was in love with you, if you didn't know better.

Or maybe, you were on the right track. Either way, you knew you had a friend in him, and everybody that you cared about truly did care about you, too. You finally felt safe for the first time in a very long time.

[nights-nonsensical-ramblings]

okay so I watched the knuckles series (by following the example of the pirates of course ) and I have to say while it was a very enjoyable watch, I have no clue what I watched and I’m mostly confused and have come away feeling mostly neutral. I don’t hate it, but it hasn’t dug its hooks in like other sonic things have for me.

Like some bits I very much enjoyed watching and would happily see again and others I couldn’t stand and dread the idea of watching again.

there were plenty of moments where Knuckles went against what I adore about him, and others that perfectly capture what I adore about him. Boy was so adorable though. Loved lots of the expressions he made.

okay I’m gonna get a bit more specific from here and cuz I got no clue what’s going on with the tagging and it gets long I’ll put it under a cut.

So it’s kinda hard for me to remember what happened, but I will say I love wades mother, she was amazing, loved her and Knuckles’ dynamic and would welcome it if she appeared again. (Also, new headcanon unlocked that knuckles is such a mamas boy he’s a magnet for motherly figures)

I really am not a fan of his sister Wanda tho. The childish sibling banter did entertain me at first (and made me think that knuckles was going to reflect on his relationship with his brothers) but it went on too long and just made Wanda feel like she never matured past being a bratty teenager. (And judging by what I’ve seen I think she’s gonna be on ‘top _ worst sonic characters’ lists for a while)

my opinion on Wade himself hasn’t really changed. I have no strong feelings towards the guy

We didn’t get as much as I wanted, but I loved the Wachowski family stuff. I needed so much more of knuckles being the trouble kid and the family trying to help.

It’s pretty annoying that the start of the show set up Knuckles learning to chill, be a kid on earth and settle in with his new family. Only to drop it basically immediately and the closest thing it has to a resolution is Knuckles finding his jam.

and yeah, I could see plenty of moments where they had the perfect opportunity to explore knuckles on a deeper level but chose not to. But I am glad they at least hinted at it with those expressions I keep raving about

On that. Cuz Pachacamacs appearance was what springboreded what was going on in a different direction. What is going on here? Is this a Knuckles thing? But Wade speaks to him to, but that was under knuckles’ guidance? I think? So can anyone in this world talk to spirits? Can only certain people be spirits? I mean. One Knuckles got over the initial shock he accepted the fact he was talking to a dead tribe member (I’m also sad that nothing was done with the idea that in this universe Knuckles and Pachacamac were alive at the same time) I got so many more questions on how spirits work in here, but I’m just gonna move on. (Although, maybe this sets up knuckles speaking to Tikal 👀. Or maybe his dad or even his mum.)

But considering what Pachacamac’s role is in the games making him so comedicly focused felt weird. Yeah this universe has different events. But still feels weird cuz of how we know Pachacamac.

I don’t even know what to say about the whole fire powers fire demon (who’s heavily implied to be iblis) I need way more time to think what is going on. Like does any of the pre existing lore apply? If so those are some WILD implications. If not, did that mean they just made this guy like iblis cuz it’s a fire creature that fans will recognize??

A minor thing but I can’t hear our house without thinking of the chemist warehouse add. And a few of the other songs are strongly associated with other things and I couldn’t help but think of them when they played. I don’t see this as a good or bad thing. It is just a thing.

hmm. I had more thoughts but after that ghost tangent I can’t really remember them. I guess I’ll have to come back later with another post if I get them back.

So, for now my closing thoughts are: it’s not a terrible show. Lots of writing choices I disagree with, but I don’t nessicaily think they’re bad. And there’s definitely enjoyment to be found (more if you watch it with some friends) but it’s not really to my taste. Especially with how much irs advertise as about knuckles and then not. Some moments made me very happy some made me want to nope out some I don’t even know.

congratulations to Wade fans, I’m gonna find what bits I wanna cherry pick and I’ll be on my merry way.

[aquaburst3]

I put out two polls over the last while asking people if Kalim's father or parents are good people. The results are that there are a fair amount of people who think that his parents aren't good people, the majority say "somewhere in the middle" and there is a small portion of people who think they are good people. (The last one is mind boggling to me, but whatever.) However, I stand in the camp that his mother is possibly a decent person and same goes for some of his siblings, but his father and at least a few of his siblings are monsters.

I think we can all agree that Kalim is an unreliable narrator and is delusional about his living situation to some extent. Kalim has said that he was poisoned and kidnapped multiple times. The game heavily implies that one of Kalim's father's wives or siblings were the ones who poisoned him and Jamil, but Kalim doesn't even want to think about that possibility. In the JP version, in Kalim's lab story, Jamil says, "Don’t tell me it was a treacherous scheme by one of the Asim family members again…!” Kalim ignores it, pretending that Jamil never said that. Similar thing happens during the last New Years Event on the JP version, except with Riddle connecting the dots about one of his siblings being the ones who poisoned him and Kalim pretends not to hear what he said. Not to mention Kalim stated in Chapter Four that he believed Jamil to be the only person who would never betray him. He puts emphasis on him being the only one, not one of the only ones.

It seems like Kalim is in deep denial about his family, and we can confirm that something sus is going on there. The question becomes, how big of an unreliable narrator is Kalim? Honestly, I think completely. Like Coriolanus Snow from A Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes levels. I think that Kalim's father and at least some of his siblings are monsters on par with the Lannisters from GOT. The canon supports this if you read between the lines.

Outside of Kalim's father having a harem of wives and concubines, which is super suspect in of itself, in the JP version, he forces the Vipers to work for him as indentured servants until they drop dead whether they like it or not, uses child labour, forces a child to be a poison tester and is completely indifferent about his son being kidnapped and poisoned by his own family.

In the JP version of Chapter 4, Jamil says, "If I did something like that and Kalim's father found out, my family would suffer for it." This implies that he beats the Vipers when they step out of line. This makes why Jamil's parents advised him to bow his head down to Kalim make a lot more sense and is understandable—they did that to prevent their son from being beaten by Kalim's father like them.

He bribed Crowley with that huge donation in order to allow his son to attend Night Raven, since the Dark Mirror would never be able to sort him. That's a literal crime. Hell, there was a group of rich people arrested for doing exactly that several years ago (x) and there's even a Netflixs true crime documentary about it!

What part of any of this is the signs of a kind and good person? None to me, at least. Hell, it's a fucking miracle that Kalim never turned out like Joffrey from GOT with a family like that!

Yes, Kalim's father hosts elaborate festivals/parties and gives Kalim expensive gifts like a literal mountain. (Fucking, seriously?) But that means jackshit about his true character.

Just because somebody throws parties and makes huge donations doesn't automatically mean that they are a good person or doing it out of the goodness of their heart. Even in real life there are plenty of rich people who make large donations just for a tax write-off. For example, JKR made plenty of donations to charities in the past, but she's still a TERF and a bigot. The same thing goes for a fantasy universe.

Same goes for Kalim's father giving Kalim expensive gifts. Rich parents giving their children expensive gifts just to make their children leave them alone is a trope in both western and Japanese media. The same thing could likely be said here. The impression I get is that his father does these things just to make Kalim shut up and leave him alone...which is...yeah...

While I think Kalim's family is up to interpretation somewhat for now, that's my reading on their true characters. I still believe that his father and plenty of his siblings are off-screen villains. This is how they will be like in my own writing—complete and utter monsters. I'm curious to see what my readers will think once his father and some of his other family members start becoming a bigger part of the picture in my fics.

[queer-cosette]

15 Question Tag Game | OC Edition

Thanks for the open tag @just-french-me-up to answer these questions about my OC! I love talking about my beloved Carlotta Suero - she features in various Miraculous Ladybug fics, with focus on her in The world is still sleeping, while I keep on dreaming and these are times that can't be weathered (and we have never been back there since then), and it's been too long since I talked about her <333

Rules: answer the questions below as yourself and/or your OC. (I'd also add that you make your own post).

1. Are they named after anyone?

Yes! Her first name is after Carlotta Brown from Enid Blyton's Twins at St Clare's series. Carlotta Brown is, like my Carlotta, Spanish by birth and a bit on the wild side with a desire for adventure and refusal to bow down to a perceived authority determined to make her conform. Very fitting for my girl.

Suero is a Spanish surname that I chose because it was likely my dad's family's surname a few hundred years or so ago. We don't know at what point we left Spain for Ireland, but Suero is a common surname in the area we were most likely from. Lil shoutout <3

Her middle name, Estrella, is slightly after my friend Stella, who is possibly the coolest person I've ever interacted with in my entire life.

2. When was the last time they cried?

these are times that can't be weathered (and we have never been back there since then) actually addresses this! Carlotta made a (implied to be unhealthy) choice at four years old that crying is pointless after witnessing a beached whale die in New Zealand. Her mother, in an attempt to lessen her heartbreak, tells her that "We shouldn't cry at something so beyond our control!" and she internalises it very heavily until her mid/late teens when she discovers the horrific truth about Gabriel Agreste's favourite pastime, and slowly breaks down in tears thinking about how it's going to fucking wreck her friend Adrien (Gabriel's son) when he finds out.

3. Do they have kids?

No, largely because Carlotta has a lot of me in her, and I don't want kids. I also unintentionally designed her superhero alterego as having the colour scheme of the asexual pride flag, so make of that what you will.

4. Do they use sarcasm?

Yes, but mostly with her younger siblings. She tries not to with Adrien because he's (in my canon) autistic and also very sheltered, so he doesn't always get it and she hates being bitchy to him even by accident because it feels like kicking a small animal. She's more a deadpan snarker than anything else, sarcasm-wise. Marinette is very much the same way, so they'll watch bad movies together and snark their way through it as a bonding exercise.

5. What’s the first thing they notice about people

Voice undertones. Carlotta is visually impaired - she has occipital lobe damage from a skateboarding accident at age 13 and has hemianopsia as a result - so sound has become even more important to her than it already was. And it was important to begin with - as a diver, she spends a lot of time underwater, and sound travels faster and further underwater than light does. Since her accident, she's learned how to pick up on tonal significance very very accurately. She can hazard a scarily accurate guess within five minutes as to where someone is from and what they think of the person introducing her to them.

6. What’s their eye colour?

Dark brown with slight violet undertones, turning fully bright violet with her Whale Miraculous transformation.

7. Scary movies or happy endings?

Both, in a way; Carlotta adores high-stakes adventure movies with happy endings. A few jumpscares go down a treat, so long as everyone's found peace by the end.

8. Any special talents?

Besides learned skills (scuba diving, playing violin, skateboarding etc.) Carlotta is weirdly good at convincing people she's way more of a goofball than she actually is. All her childish antics do a good job of concealing how genuinely intelligent and sharp-minded she really is.

9. Where were they born?

Maternity ward in Asturias, Spain, in the Spring of 2000.

10. What are their hobbies?

Scuba diving, playing violin, and skateboarding!

11. Do they have any pets?

Her mother has a service dog, a golden labrador named Honey, after she had a workplace accident that left her with multiple severe burns from the waist down; Carlotta herself doesn't really consider Honey to be *hers* though. She did have a magical underwater encounter with a juvenile sperm whale off the Azores who she named Herman, but Herman is, of course, a wild animal, and more a friend than a pet.

12. What sports do they play/have they played?

Carlotta is very into swimming and diving! She's a very powerful long-distance swimmer, and has competed in diving competitions. She prefers outdoorsey activities to actual sports, though - things like skateboarding and tree-climbing.

13. How tall are they?

Five foot eleven inches (same height as me!). I wanted more tall girl characters, so I made one.

14. Favourite subject in school?

Biology. She wants to be a cetologist, and has thus far managed to find a way to turn the topic of every essay back towards oceanic megafauna.

15. Dream job?

Part time cetologist (she wants to be the first scientist to film the birth of a blue whale) and part time superhero. Maybe both at the same time!

Tagging @hanaasbananas @theladyfae @private-bryan @multimousenette and anyone else who would like to talk about their OC!

[hot-pirate-milfs-in-your-area]

Sea king head canons/theories

I'm writing a fic that will heavily feature a sea king, and as seakings are mostly treated as an obstacle (something to make Shanks save Luffy/ lose an arm or a reason the calm belt being dangerous) and not animals that they are. Their biology rarely has relevance to the plot and therefore rarely elaborated upon. 

Witch is a problem/bonus for me as I have little to work with but- I can just make up what I want about them behavior and biology wise and put my childhood obsession with animals to use. I plan on mostly elaborating on what crumbs there are. 

So what do we know? And what can I expand that into?(my reasoning) under cut.

1.they live in the calm belt and specifically ‘nest’ there.

-Different dubs might vary on the term ‘nest’ but i'm going to go with that and assume they lay eggs

-Not many large size real world sea life lay eggs most doing live births, except for certain species of sharks that lay ‘eggs’ often called mermaid purses 

-It doesn't look like a bird egg in having a oval/round shape and hard shell, but are rectangle shaped tough leathery pouches with tendrils that anchor the eggs to the seafloor or hidden in seaweed 

-And That you can be seen through to the young shark developing 

-(talking from the next point) large social animals who have large young often invest a lot of time raising and teaching young often spend years in the group

-The instinct to protect their can also push how dangerous traveling the calm belt is

So I'll make Seakings nesting animals, laying soft shell ‘eggs’. That they stay and guard and raise their young, investing heavily in 1 big baby vs. lots of little ones. And the eggs are see through and tough but likely vulnerable to predators so they are guarded.  

2 seakings being social

-The same group of sea kings seen in the calm belt (and intros) were later seen in the fishman island arc when shirahoshi accidentally summoned them 

-This was mostly done to nowe have to design a new set of sea kings 

-But i'm going to take that and think they are a pack/herd/group animal 

-And manny group animals collectively raise young 

-This also implies they migrate 

-And manny birds who lay eggs have a imprinting instinct, meaning the fist thing the newly hatched baby sees it understand as its caretaker

-That has led to interesting occurrences of ducklings imprinting on people,shoes, basketballs, ect. and thinking thats its mother and following that around

-Compounding instinct can result in a cat having her kittens in a barn the same time a clutch of ducklings hatching and instead of eating them the cat decides that these are also her kittens and the ducks deciding this is mother 

Seakings are social pack animals, raising young in social groups instead of abandoning them. They migrate to reproduce and live in safer waters until; the young are strong enough for the deeper seas. And that the young imprint on older group members. 

3. Group organization.

-Most group mammals are organized into family units 

-There is no such thing as alpha male wolves that study has been thoroughly disproved

-Instead wolves live in family units of 

-Parents->older/ adult pups (that can help hunt and care for younger siblings)-> adolescent pups(learning but not much real help to hunting) -> baby (there job is being babies and not dying) 

-As some younger members of the group age they may leave and form their own packs and split off from the group 

-This particularly applies to the males, who can be driven out from the group to not accidentally interbreed with the lead female 

-And from that most groups (elephants, whales, dolphins, lions) are matriarchal with males often being solitary  

-(lions are matriarchal females will be apart of pride for her entire life time while males typical only stay/last for a few years at a time) 

-The leaders of all group animals are the oldest most experienced who pass their knowledge down to the younger members 

-And will likely care for the sick and injured letting them recover 

So I'll make seakings mated pair lead groups, with older members teaching young hunting/survival skills. The groups are close and will care for injured members.  With solo male seakings being solitary until they find a mate and start a group. 

(The real question is what do you call a group of seakings?) 

4.Do they hold their breath and dive or can they breathe under water?

-This one is kinda tricky 

-As most sea kings we see are closest to the surface 

-Living in coats (to being named after the area i.e. lord of the coats that ate shanks arm)/ calm belts to reproduce/ and normally spotted near the surface 

-they've also been seen in fishman island and is stated as being 10,000 meters underwater 

-I used to assume they could just breath underwater but i'm going to go with air based on sperm whales 

-Sperm whales can hold their breaths for around 45 minutes and dive to 975 meters in one dive, withstanding 14 psi of pressure in just a little shy of 10 feet

-(one piece humans built different to be able to withstand that much pressure) 

-So if sea kings are hundreds of times bigger than sperm whales their diving time and depth 

-Broad body shape and insp I’ll accept some specific breeds  being able to breath underwater 

S-o ill apply most seakings are air breathing and dive to hunt but generally stay closer to the surface. But with the variations in their designs ill accept some being able to breath water (jellyfish/visible gills/ shelled seak kings as that exception)

5. Variations

-There’s a wide variety between one sea king to the next 

-Shapes varying from eel, fish, shark, whale and dragon all being seen 

-Some have fins or legs or are completely smooth 

-They all fall under seaking 

-So I'm going to divide them into spices based on body shape/ traits that vary the most i.e. pigs/hogs look very different  but still nearly being the same animal

-The most common is the eel shape and others being pacific variations based on environment 

-And we can put a little of high school 10 biology with Darwin's survival of the fittest not being strictly about being big and strong but being suited to their environment 

-A hippo in the tundra may be the biggest thing and safe from predators but it will freeze to death as its not suited for cold 

-Another example is over the last 30 years a group of scientist studying a colony of birds living under a highway have noticed the birds wings have changed 

-The the birds with longer wings that are slower at turning have almost completely disappear in the colony most bird having short wings that can turn sharply and avoid being hit by cars so they breed and their young carrion on this helpful trait  

Eel shaped seakings are the most common and variations that stray more wired put to finding unoccupied nichs to fill becoming a split in the evolution line. 

6. Diets

-the one piece wiki says their type ‘C’/’big savage’ (same as fishmen) as a class of dangerous given in cannon by the human of one piece 

-So i'll be talking that (and the op wiki) with a grain of salt 

-But its stated as “ This is largely justified by their near-constant preying on other creatures, even comparatively tiny humans; once a Sea King has zeroed in on prey, it will attack relentlessly, and only retreat in the face of overwhelming physical (more rarely, mental) force. 

-i'm not really going to use this much as any sensible predators are rarely as persistent as most prefer to save energy and pick easier/more filling prey (a healthy lion won't bother catching a mouses unless as a play behavior) 

-Large predators on a whole are less aggressive than most media depicts (looking at you jurassic world) only being aggressive to people when starved/ sick/ or young are threatened 

-And as i've concluded they are social i'll put a lot of that aggression adults thinking their young are threatened 

-Or wandering lone males feeling their territory threatened 

-So we can assume as predators almost anything they can bite is game the island whales(laboons species) are a likely candidate as well as other seakings 

-Maybe sea kings living near the coast will pull down unsuspecting land animals 

Seakings are not prickly and will scavenge if given the opportunity and supplement their diets grazing on underwater vegetation. When hunting they target the sick, elderly and weak animals to expend the least amount of energy possible, but can group cooperate to hunt bigger prey. A slow metabolism keeps such large animals from needing to eat constantly. 

7.What preys on seakings?

-Humans (when strong enough)

-I do like the idea of whaling ships that hunt seakings, harpooning a seaking and drive it to exhaustion as method of hunting (endurance predators we humans are) 

-Banadawani are their only stated natural predators 

-Witch is fair ancient species of crocodiles were known to hunt dinosaurs (look up boar coc for free nightmares) 

-Yuda (the snakes pulling Hancock's ship) are avoided 

-Its stated on the wiki that they are sea serpents so i'll put them down as a seaking variation

-Other sea kings 

-Giants 

-And blue gorilla/ blugoir (what the hell are they btw? I completely forgot about them in the impel down arc. Blue faceless humans with fur and also guard the prison?? Who? Why? what?) 

Few things are big enough to threaten seakings and the sit top of the food chain. Social groups are a good defiance from anything willing to try.    

8.Intelligence.

-We know sea kings have complex thoughts 

-And most group animals are intelligent and are adaptive to read the body language/ communicate 

Passing down knowledge in hunting and sharing specific plentiful hunting grounds. being capable of complex thought and communication.    

If you're still here, thanks for reading 5 pages of me rambling on seaking biology and occasionally me standing on a soapbox on animal misconceptions. 

[scruffyssketchbook]

I’m going back through the comic for funsies (and I may or may not be trying to compile a doc with all of the secrets and lore and alt text) but it’s actually killing me idk how the relationships work at all. It feels like there’s a lot of incest… unless you decanonised it??

Ik everyone’s in houses but sometimes they aren’t? Like harmony is in love with her brother? Or her son? And has had many children with her other son Lem?? And the alt text on page 28 (Wiz) says that Sky is Umbreon’s twin, but the comics afterwards imply that Dusk wants to be mates with Sky. Do we just ignore the concept of bio siblings in the Pokémon universe?

This isn’t meant to come off as harsh and sorry if you’ve already answered something like this before. I love ssec but it can be hard to keep up with everything that happens lol.

Also unrelated but since Ik you rewrote the plot at least once, is there any particular comics or ask series’s or time frames that are now non canon and shouldn’t be treated as canon?

Author chan: Yes yes, I can very much answer this. The TLDR is basically- I decanonized it after people told me it was incest, because incest is gross and it was ANNOYING to have it in SSEC. I was not aware because I saw Brotherhoods themselves as family units, not the whole box. That's why the "not mating with eevees outside your brotherhood" Rule was made, because Brotherhoods were seen as family groups.

I recently changed that rule actually, as part of my "revamping SSEC" thing I have going. So now, eevees are allowed to date within their brotherhood (Because, Most eevees in the box are NOT related)

I realize this may sound odd, but I was 14 when I made SSEC and due to things I will explain, I didn't see it as incest. Now, in the present, I understand that it is just part of their world, and that it is not the same as incest in our own real world. (as I will explain) but I still decanonized it for the main cast of characters cause, despite their being a purpose to it, and it still being in their world, It was still annoying and I didn't like it.

And let me say before I write everything else, that incest is gross and I do not support it in anyway.

I will answer the SSEC related questions after the explanation

So. Explanation. The concept of SSEC relies heavily on the pokemon games. SSEC essentially takes place IN the main line pokemon games. Ofc, there are extra things added to the worldbuilding, but I do try to stick to mechanics that are used in the main line pokemon games. What does this have to do with incest? Well. There is a LOT of incest in pokemon games. What do I mean? Well.

One of the most weird mechanics in pokemon is breeding. We see it as it is, at face value. And thats how I saw it as a kid, and why I didn't think anything of it. But the truth of the mater is that Breeding in pokemon is ROYALY MESSED UP. LIKE. ABSOLUTELY F'ED UP. UNETHICAL. Like. Pokemon have no rights. An example is. You don't. Know the ages. of the pokemon. you are breeding. Unless you hatched them from an egg yourself, ofc. the pokemon could literally be any age and you just. wont know. I have encountered someone who denied this before. But like. How would you know how long a pokemon lived for before you encountered them? We can say that they just spawned in right there and then, we can say they are just pixels, but that's only a good explanation if we assume that this is purely the game world, which we are not in this case. Everyone just throws pokemon into the daycare without thinking of it. This is the same with Pokemon Family members.

In pokemon breeding, trainers breed pokemon family members to get stronger pokemon. What do I mean?

The IV breeding method.

You can look up multiple videos and articles about this method, but the main point is that you basically breed the baby pokemon that you just breed with their mother or father, to create a stronger pokemon with better IVs. And this goes on and on until you breed a pokemon with Perfect IVs.

So basically you breed a Parent with their child/children to create the strong, perfect pokemon that you need.

Due to the prevalent nature of this breeding method in the pokemon game/ SSEC world, pokemon born in captivity using this method don't see anything wrong with this. (Pokemon in the wild avoid this in the SSEC world) And like, honestly, unlike in our real world, breeding pokemon with their offspring only produce negative effects if you do it with the wrong offspring. Trainers are essentially rewarded for breeding family members together.

Ofc, plz don't use this information for- weird things. Incest stories and things are gross and make me feel sick. I'm only putting this out there for people to understand what is going on with SSEC world lore. Yes. I know its messed up. No. I do not condone it. SO! TO SSEC EXPLINATIONS!!!

v This is current canon v

EVERYONE is in a brotherhood (house). Every eevee and eeveelution except Harmony, Dominic, and any eeveelution/eevee characters not in the PC. Harmony is not in love with her brother. Harmony is not in love with Dusk. Lem is NOT Harmony's child, BUT the trainer DID hatch Lem and make Harmony and Lem breed together. Harmony is not in love with Lem. "Twin" was the beta word for "Littermate" But has since been reworked to mean actual Twins. Littermates are pokemon hatched around the same time, usually right after each other. They do not have to come from the same mother. Biological siblings in the ssec pokemon universe do not really matter. The concept of Siblings matter in some places, but there is normally no way to tell if a pokemon is biologically related to another one, nor do they share DNA.

Currently the only eevees related to Harmony are the main boys and most eevees with "inherit" on the Master Eevee list. Everyone else (this includes Eve, Miku, Dawn, Daisy, Oliver, etc) are not related to her.

All comics are canon to the series, but there are multiple comics from early on that need to be updated for discrepancies. (and will be) The askblog is "soft canon" Things in it are canon until something newer says otherwise. I recommend using Asks that are newer only, as I am heavily modifying plots in SSEC right now and things before Blizz took over the Blog are pretty much probably not canon.

HOPEFULLY THAT EXPLAINS IT!!! If you have anymore questions, please ask! I'd love to answer.

[sanchoyo]

arc v episodes 41-50 thoughts! :3

-41 answered a Lot of my questions and raised more, just like every other ep in the last stretch, lol. so, reiji got to academia when he was younger! (unclear how young exactly, but he looked between 14-15 if im being generous…? it said it was 3 years ago I think, so that puts him around 18? he looks older than 18 imo adjkf make him more babyfaced…) using a portal? did he build it or did he find it from where his dad mustve come thru it?

-interestingly, he says to his dad something like 'you abandoned me and mom!' …no mention of layra? were they not born yet? are they possibly an adopted refugee from xyz dimension? I say adopted bc 1. layra is clearly traumatized by SOMETHING and I think a War would fucking do that. 2. assuming they hadnt been born yet and his dad stayed in fusion dimension, his mom either got a new partner (and, we havent seen her with anyone else? except. maybe the bodyguard JKDSHKJF hes my other suspect. but then that wouldnt explain why theyre so TRAUMATIZED, either.) …or LEO had a kid with a woman in fusion world and tried to train them as a child soldier and reiji saved his new sibling?? like he was trying to save serena? I dont KNOW yet these are my Theories tho based on what weve been shown. yet layra is def older than 3 yrs old LMAO so where'd they come from...

-reiji's dad gives a vague statement like 'its to fuse the dimensions/combine them' or something. ok? how does that benefit you sir, and why is turning everyone from xyz into cards going to help with that? we keep seeing a big machine, and what looks like cards(?) being fed into it (I have to assume the cards ppl are trapped in) …many questions

-i KNOWWWW all the fusion kids are heavily indoctrinated so its hard for me to be mad at serena or sora, honestly, its clear she thinks leo is keeping her captive bc she thinks he thinks shes not strong enough. which is Wrong, clearly he wants to Use Her for Something, but she obv doesnt think that yet and wants to PROVE HERSELF just like sora wanted to do… reiji says smth like 'if you dont team up with me now we'll be enemies' which. I ALSO get since he wants to protect HIS city/world from his own father (very fucked and sad) its TOUGH though bc I like both of them n i dont want them to fight! she KNOWS reiji wanted to help her escape when she was little! AUGH. it hurts :( Im sure theyll be buds by the end of the series but Still I want them to be friends NOW!!!

-ok yuzu's dad being so HYPED to see her on tv being like 'THERE SHE ISSSS MY LITTLE GIRL SHES SO CUTE IM SO PROUD YESSS LOOK AT HER!!!' ME. ME TOO DUDE. WE ARE THE SAME. I KIN HER DAD NOW. I LOVE yuzu and want her to WIN!!!!

-'i'll never duel like I did against kachidoki again' yuya honey its ep 41 as I'm pausing to type this. You Absolutely Will. you're in a yugioh series. Be Genre Aware. you WILL go crazy Go Wild again. sorry! (i'm sure you and yuto will figure it out and itll be FINE in the end, but willing to bet it happens 2-3 more times before then

-interesting theres something called obelisk force…its been a MINUTE since I watched gx, but all of the dorms were named after slifer, obelisk, and ra, right? so…it implies the god cards still exist(ed?) in this world for fusion dimension to have called this force that, right? so dm..happened? ? is dm just the past of the fusion dimension, then? (but also, 5ds is implied to be the future from gx and exists separately somehow in another dimension and!!! AUGH!!! BRAIN WORKING SO HARD TO TRY TO GUESS HOW THIS ALL WORKS)

-leo implies he KNOWS why serena looks like yuzu but tells sora he doesnt need to know. but has he considered /i/ want to know. pls.

-very surprised sora is coming back this early at all, or is healed….i expected it to be a While! I hope yuzu and yuya talk him out of taking serena back tbh. theyre FRIENDS and he rly seemed to genuinely LIKE them. bet they'll have an Angsty duel over it…yuzu's dad immediately being like 'dw we'll get sora back!' he rly does kin me. sir we've been on the same wavelength since ep 1. hes my self insert

-ok yuya's mom makes me so uncomfortable with the constant 'michy' stuff. lady hes the same age as your son, chill…and root for your actual son, tf. cringefail mom

-can I just say how I love in entertainment dueling everyone has a Gimmick. theres samurais. there's literal Knights. idol girl duelists. its so FUN, of course you'd have a THEME to stand out! to an extent its always been that way for pro duelists in ygo I feel like, or at least ppls decks reflected them a bit, and this feels like a natural progression of that. like, yuya leans into the circus theme a BIT but he could commit more to it imo. bring back the full clown outfit from ep 1. or a ringleader outfit like his dad seems to have? thatd be FUN. -actually, do you think he knows Circus Stuff? like can yuya juggle. can he ride a unicycle. can he make balloon animals. etc. go all in or go home.

-ok…so reiji's plan to keep the city from panicking about the other dimensional invaders looking for serena is…to turn the city into a huge duel grounds for a battle royale for the tournament. surely the entire city's population isnt in that stadium/indoors… I GUESS he trusts his lil squad to go duel them all, but we already know all the duelists who are in the tournament will be involved and have to step in since theyre the main characters…why not just?? tell them too?? I feel like theyd all be willing to duel to Save Their City & be able to keep it secret..surprising them with it is a dick move.

-i know. i KNOW before even checking that every single human person whos watched this show sees olga and thinks the same damn thing. shes an elsa anna frozen fusion. but she IS! SHE IS!!!! JSDKFJJK.

-the kid yuzu is dueling is SO cute. the ENGLISH LMAO. WHY IS IT RANDOM ENGLISH WORDS AND NOT TURKISH OR KURDISH?? hes from anatolia! his clothes dont look quite right from what I can tell, either… confused. but at least hes super nice despite my..qualms about how he's being portrayed otherwise…yuya, meanwhile, is dueling some ASSHOLES.

-btw can I just say I appreciate the pacing here? showing multiple duels with minor charas in one ep so we can get to the more important ones faster? not that I SUPER mind fillerish eps lol

-dennis…from BROADWAY LDS?? like CALIFORNIA?? I mean he has an incredibly American Name so. I assume thats right but…lmao. american guy. tbh when he got penalized for entering a duel and lost 2000 lp, yuya shouldve lost that duel. he was down to 200 lp, the other player was going to win before dennis did that. why is yuya not out entirely? idc if the opposing duelists are dicks. they werent CHEATING or anything, having him stay in and DENNIS ONLY getting penalized is stupid. I KNOW I'm supposed to want to take yuyas side here, and I do let a good bit of 'bc hes the protag!' bullshit slide (like always magically getting the right cards, thats ygo standard! but stuff like this annoys me…sometimes its ok for him to take the L. (ok, and I still think itd be funny for a protag not to win a championship thing…)

-dennis said 'yeehaw' while riding his monster. this deserved its own mention

-dennis was able to snap yuya out of his lil Moment, which is Good. he IS an accurate portrayal of a californian, tho. I will not elaborate.

-ep 44 called sora attacks. insert the 'we are fucking under attack' meme (NO BUT REALLY I DIDNT REALIZE I MISSED HIM SO MUCH. I GUESS. HES MY SONBOY NOW. JDKHFJKN GLAD HES COMING BACK!! MENTALLY PREPPING!! FOR ANGST)

-halil and olga and michio are all such cute minor charas i want them to be a bff trio…

-immediately the way dennis cornered yuzu gave me HIVES where did he pull that rose from. it didnt feel like he was hitting on her like the parents thought (btw yoko continues to be extremely Weird about kids her sons age…eugh), it felt vaguely Bad Vibes. why was it framed like that D: cannot say I trust him very much now! (esp since he very quickly introduced himself as yuyas friend…then again. americans are Kind of Like that. I speak from experience when I say when I talk about acquaintances to other ppl ill be like 'oh my friend said/did this or that' SO. CANNOT RLY TALK PERSONALLY.)

-halil's english is better than dennis's and dennis is supposed to be american, lmao

-yuya and shun talking abt all the dimensional stuff/yuto on live tv…just air all the laundry guys. (but also, reiji very quickly cut the feeds when the academia warriors showed up, so…good for him to keep public panic down ig…even tho im of the opinion maybe the public Should Know, tbh)

-sora being in charge of a bunch of fusion goons that look like grown ass adults LMAO imagine taking orders from a 13 yr old. embarrassing

-'thats against the rules!' is the funniest thing you could say as a reaction to seeing your friend get turned into a duel monster card before your very eyes.

-lunalights are so godamn cute im going to DIE if I dont make a deck of them immediately

-ohhkay there was a visual of yuya and yuto walking side by side and the pendulum necklace swinging between them. this is symbolism right. theyre the two sides of the swinging scale, but their feelings of rage are united in this little duel against obelisk force (yuto seeing heartlanders get carded, yuya seeing the knights earlier get carded) …i SAID EARLIER yuya repressing emotions is BAD (smile when u wanna cry is BAD advice) and this feels like. well. 2 of their Rages Overlayed (hehe xyz metaphor) but really…not unjustified rage? what the fusion dimension is doing is fucked up! its ok! to be mad about it and fight back!

-ok, the entire city got SEALED OFF FOR THE BATTLE ROYALE. ENTIRELY. TOTALLY INSANE THING TO DO REIJI, BUT I GET IT. its keeping people safe. but i imagine the ppl of the city are like, majorly inconvenienced over this…it only last 24 hours, right? still would be Annoying

-yoko could you act fucking concerned about your son instead of being weird about teenagers. for ONE second. then she made a very fucking gross racial comment about halil TOO MY GOD throw this whole woman away that is so creepy and bad. i wanted to like her bc she adopts lil animals and stuff and is involved which is rare for a ygo parent, but them playing these comments for jokes is legit making me grossed out and mad

-'you may not exit during the battle royale' WHAT. I GET THE REAL REASON WHY. BUT NO WAY PPL WOULD STAY IN A STADIUM 24 HOURS STRAIGHT. AT LEAST NOT EVERYONE…TF.

-yugo seems so confused constantly and I relate. 'every time this glows I get teleported!' dude. sound a little more worried! also something very funny about everyone constantly misnaming him and the SUBTITLES ALSO DOING IT BY CALLING HIM HUGO. also just revving his bike aggressively like 'STOP BEING UNCONSCIOUS' LMAO??? hes so funny already. also his hair color combo is so cute, 2nd fav yu design next to yuri so far (cannot beat pink+purple combo, tho)

-hey. gongenzaka pinning yuya while theyre both pinned under a column and yuya thrashing and yelling n growling while his eyes are glowing? straight out of the fucking exorcist. huge fan of whatever the hell is going on. then everyones pinning him, HE BIT AND PUNCHED SOMEONE TRYING TO ESCAPE. VERY very concerned as to why the hell hes suddenly a fucking Demon but alright! kind of obsessed with the vibes of that. More Feral Protags in general

contender for funniest screenshot yet. seriously, there had better be a ton of paranormal aus for this shit since its CANON hes posessed by Some Sort of Demon, right.

-OK…so meiru is legit, since she can see two souls in yuya…AND SOME KIND OF DARKNESS TRYING TO 'OVERWHELM THE TWO SOULS' WHAT THE HELL IS THAT. SOME KIND OF OUTER DIMENSIONAL DEMON?? (this is ygo, so it would be some kind of evil Card Spirit or something I Bet…) CHRIST DID NOT EXPECT THAT. DO AN EXOCISM FOR THAT AND LEAVE YUTO IN THERE…WE CAN ALL BE BUDS AFTER THAT

-aww the ninjas are surprisingly chill bros! I really really like them ;w; just guys who help for the sake of being good and kind!!

-is he…….u know…..

?

-I get the logic behind yuzu and serena switching clothes and appreciate serena being at least willing to try to hear shun out. however, how would u realistically mistake them for each other w their hair being SO different even when their faces are the Same. and also, so far, yuzu and serena didnt have the same reaction yuto/yuzu had. to be FAIR those boys didnt freak out and go murdery until their monsters resonated in a duel, I think. still, it cracks me up how RATIONAL and calm the girls were scheming together. yuzu real protag for real now that yuya is possessed. he must be the damsel yuzu saves from his own inner demons. >:3

-dennis is with yuri/fusion world. knew he was sus. never trust an american (wait is he fr american or just pretending LMAO has he ever actually been to broadway. I need to know)

-WHY THE HELL WERE THEY SLEDDING IN A BATHTUB? WHERE DID THEY GET THAT.

-yuzu thinking yuri is yugo. my god this series like like. the parent trap x4… 'ruri and rin' so now we have all (4) yuya and yuzu counterpart names, right? …weird how yuya's are all yu names but serena, rin, yuzu, and ruri seem to have..no naming scheme in common that I can tell?? maybe it's one of those things that makes more sense when reading it in japanese or something…

-oh my god yugo is THEE definition of 'idk whats going on but its FUCKED and im gonna HELP without THINKING' HE IS PERFECT.

-WOW. shingo forced himself into reijis lil batcave . love that for him, yes come back to the plot!!! force your way into the plot!!!

-cannot stop laughing over yuzu just teleporting yuri away. goodbye forever!

-yuya confirmed yuto isnt whats making him go crazy, it for SURE is some kind of Demon (HIS OWN WORDS.) I…my theory so far was smth abt both of them together and their feelings mixing was what was causing it bc of some kind of interdimensional clash or smth. but nope. demon. where did it COME FROM. WHY IS IT IN HIM?? HOW LONG AS IT BEEN IN HIM?? WEVE NEVER HAD HINT OF IT BEFORE THE OTHER YU'S SHOWED UP.

-I WONDER if its the reason he can pendulum summon? how does that ability fit in? this dimension is 'standard' apparently and all the other summoning methods are here. in all other 3 dimensions, theres only (1) method. so. either 'standard' is actually 'pendulum' dimension and something happened where all the other dimensions kinda leaked in, or…theres another?? dimension?? or pendulum is smth…from outside of the main 4…? are we SURE there's only four, bc I know Link Summoning is also a thing in later series, lol... (also..it is called arc v..v being a roman numeral for 5, right?...or?? does it stand for smth at all? gonna be real honest, I still dont kno what the gx or 5ds in gx/5ds stood for. lol)

-ok, crazy theory…its from outside of the dimensions (like, a… space eldritch being) that snuck into this one and got into yuya like yuto seems to be (is…yuto going to be able to get out of yuya at any point btw JKSDHFK how conscious is he at any given time? ? is he like. like hes ALIVe right, kind of…in spirit form for some reason, unclear on details. can we take him back to xyz world n he'll be able to pop out again. JSADSJDFK REMAINING HOPEFUL. I cant even be sad about him 'dying' bc i still dont. believe he is dead for reals)

-yuya's demon is obv evil and malicious. actually, BOTH YUTO /AND/ YUGO earlier had the 'kill destroy bite kill' eye glowy moment. so it begs the question if the demon thing isnt in ALL of them somehow…ok, furthering my Theory, the demon split into 4s and went into all of them since they seem to be kinda the same personish but in diff dimensions/raised differently?? and maybe yuris more fucked up than the others bc 1. childhood indoctrination 2. giving into that Things influence more? dont rly know but this is my Theory given what we KNOW when im typing this (ep 47)

-yuya then goes on to say no matter what he will duel with smiles and stuff. $5 says hes gonna befriend that demon too s0 yami and yugi style. this is ygo I KNOW friendship can tame the Beast. or theyll rip it out and duel it. or have an 'inside your inner mind' duel with it. or something like that…have the other yu's had experiences with it or did it rly not start acting up until they met? hm

-the V in arc V stands for Very Curious…

-SHUN FELL DOWN THE STAIRS. OOF. rolled all the way down…………feel bad for laughing but I did . I laughed A Lot

-ok, the demon thing seems to respond to strong negative emotions (every time someone gets carded, sora not listening to yuya when he was trying to tell him this was wrong…) yuya was able to calm It Down by thinking of yuto's…last words…but like. he Needs to Feel His Feelings at some point. (and id argue being mad in this situation is perfectly justified, like, any other time, if he didnt have a rage demon in him?? feels a bit like a bruce banner/hulk situation…) I cant wait for the yuya learns yoga and meditation arc

-i knew sora and yuya were about to duel. he keeps saying 'we were NEVER friends I was just messing around whatever we cant become FRIENDS from a DUEL' have some genre awareness dude. ur gonna be friends. or else. (but also, he never seemed like he was malicious towards anyone in standard. hes actually told yuya to back off several times bc he . obv doesnt WANT to hurt him or prob didnt want him involved in the first place…theyre FRIENDSSS. i love ygo friend plots so much. makes me all warm and fuzzy :)c )

-we got layras first lil smile AAAAHG im so glad…baby deserves to smile (and it was bc the other kid said they were like reiji AWW cmon man. thats cute…)

-sorry, I just realized…has shingo been swapping his deck types each duel?? JASDHF LAST TIME IT WAS LIKE, FURRIES OR SOMETHING. NOW ITS DIFFERENT…. thats so funny, has there ever been a character to do that? (ik the protags usually get new cards over the course of the shows, but not entirely new decks…)

-ok, ok, it must be pointed out, while she was running from yuri, yuzu did some SICK flips (and she did some cool gymnastic moves in her duel with masumi), and sora did some sick flips too during his duel with yuya. in the entertainment duel school do they get taught gymnastics, too? like they must, right? very fun. side note, every time sora does these stupid little flips with his suckers in his mouth i keep worrying hes gonna choke JKSDHK

-'/I/ chased academia away!' yes shingo you absolutely did, great job bud.

-there was NO need for reiji to stand like this up there. lmao extra king

-yuya got worried when they all realized serena ISNT yuzu, then looked at sora (accusingly?) and sora immediately Ran Away. where u goin bud? going to find ur friend yuzu, perhaps?

-yuya rly said 'who gives a fuck abt the lancers. ppl are being CARDED, REIJI.' and CRIED. do NOT like yuya tears :( but also, he needs it. let it out dude, cry as much as u need to. this is scary and ur 14.

-holy shit, new op already??? uhhh op 1 still my favorite in terms of song for sure, but thats def new domino right? and JACK MY FRIEND JACK!!!! IN THE OPENING!!!!!! HIIIII JACK :D so excited…… it looks like yuzu's gonna be hangin out with yugo in new domino for a bit which is SO FUN!!! living such a hot girl summer with her many yu-friends

-im glad serena clarified it wasnt reiji's fault,, bc like. hes been trying to HELP nonstop and has been organizing stuff like the lancers for that. also, serena in general is just super cool and honest such a chad <3 (I do understand yuya being angry over this tho, he thinks yuzu was carded…)

-oh the abrupt duel between reiji and yuya when reijis just trying to explain what happened to heartland lol…ok? it was like. very sudden. I know its yuto inside of yuya getting worked up, but yuto is the one who was willing to explain it earlier to yuya many many eps ago, so..why is he suddenly freaking out? reiji kind of lacks tact but he wasnt being overly rude or anything, and he fr is just trying to protect their home, so…?? everyone CHOSE to fight, its not like reiji was puppeting them like yuya keeps saying tbh…you think any of ur friends wouldve sat around while their home was under attack?? feels like yuya is just upset and needs someone to direct it at whos in front of him, but its severely misdirected anger

-very funny shun and serena are just standing on the sidelines, calmly talking, while reiji and yuya are dueling. if anything the two of them should be the ones mad since theyre on opposite sides of a war, but theyre so…open to talking!! why are reiji and yuya the ones dueling lmao!!

-'I HavE nO inTEntION OF JOinING THE laNCErs' yuya says, then 5 seconds later: ed starts showing 'LANCER SELECTION' with yuya in the middle and hanging out with all of them LMAOOO ur the main character u dont get to Not Join the Little Mandatory Club to save the World. yaaay serena seems to be in it too! I kinda figured she would so not a huge surprise, considering shes been so willing to listen and have her mind changed p easily. I really like her, yuzu is still my fav girl in arc v but serena is Very Cool :)

-also, new ED is def my favorite out of the first 3! (guessing there'll either be 5 or 6 in the end, gonna try and keep track and rank them at the end...so far this 3rd ED and the first OP are my favs!)

[wizeardmanteis]

today the strangest thing happened. id been making kandi all day, a long awaited task turned furthermore into a burden as the days dragged on and continued to the sooner end of the summer season. when id found myself soaked in the silk of a conundrum. i needed hot glue because i lacked any type of punctuation mark for the ending to a bracelet i was making. however i had no such exclamation mark. so i had made one of an upside down i, however i needed to glue it to my other letter for this to work. yet no luck, the glue was missing. obviously bewildered by this, i searched and asked around finally leading back to the layer by which my brother bodes his domain. it quickly escalated and got out of hand, as his response to my questioning was that to assume my inquiry implied that of theivery. it did not but he knows not with his young age to listen. so alas i was thrown out to look elsewhere. my parents had gone so i took to it with the free space from the car having vacated the area where the storage bins lay. and i got to work opening and looking into them. i knew of two hot glue vestiges in my home. two documented ones at least, as they both routinely go missing and reappear at random, i knew better than to not take the time to look inside the office storage bins in particular. and as i dug through my first box in particular, i found photos of myself from deep in my very first term growing period to my most recent. i, being the first born was always the most heavily documented on, of my sibling collective. which is fine so to speak as i have proper proof for my experiences and that of my life previously to my most recent years. however i had come upon a pooled amount of dvds at the bottom, after i had divvied out some pictures of myself for the taking to add to my childhood shoebox. many familial events and activities, holidays, school photos, my parents wedding, stuff like that. however there was a dvd entitled “((my name)) photos” i was confused about the title so i set it in the pile with the other things i was certain id never find and left shortly after to make my departure. however when id put the disc into my tv after id arrived in my room. itd made many strange noises. then inexplicably brought me to a picture of a snowy mountain, in what looked to be a tundra climate. i stared at the photo for awhile just pondering the whole thing, before i realised it was a sort of slideshow. i pressed the remote for the next slide and took note that all of the slides were more or less the same thing. the disc being full of pictures of the dreary antarctic. where images of snowy mountains and clusters of strange looking penguin hold themselves a collective. though it continued endlessly, of eerie near perfect looking snowy mountains, surrounded by water and such. the photographer perhaps on a boat. i found it went on forever, me skipping through them for a solid half hour maybe, before i was called to do some chores. id been gone for a long time too, about midnight, as is the curse of leaving my room and stalling my way back to the connecting hallways, always somehow leading back to my door. i got right back to skipping through the slideshow. and the photos did not change, and there was no option to go backward. i took a short video of what i was seeing, to try to picture it better in explanation. but its really short as my phone stopped itself from recording not even 20 seconds in because of low storage-__-

im not very sure what to make of this, what association i am supposed to draw from a cd with my name on it, implying photos of me through its titling. and what the frequent photos of the antarctic imply to me as a person. this is quite the query, is it not? im afraid to take it out of my dvd player as i do not want to lose my place in the sequence of images i have found myself lost in. many of these photos beyond uncanny in a way i cannot pinpoint. perhaps it is the entailment of isolation making me feel this way. as i find myself anxious thinking of the endless artic tundra and pointlessness provided to me in such an environment, leading me to an endless feild of water, all surrounding to my periphery. a true nightmare to be lost to the ice and water beholdent in these photos. how i long to be away from it and yet i am viewing it from beyond that of a distance. i wonder what this is reflective of if not my own fear, is it true that our fears are what make us ourselves? i wonder where i heard that from. maybe in the future, i am these photos. maybe im the one taking them. or maybe these photos are just meant to represent me as an individual being. like finn from adventure time representing a sword when not trapped to that of a flesh corporeal form. regardless, perhaps these images were placed here for me to find when id come the age of understanding. i will ponder this more frequently as it has happened now a time ago, since id started writing this. yesterday to be exact. and i am still unsure if i even want to keep looking through the slideshow, as im not sure if it will ever end and time has not been very generous to me as of late. we will see. for now it is a mystery i will continue to write about.

continuation to this post

[inkykeiji]

sapphire and gold

characters: dabi, takami keigo | hawks

genre: smut

notes: for @babyy-bunnii and @kirispiracy! inspired by a text i sent my best friend lmao. i considered using the name touya instead of dabi, but i didn’t want anyone to get confused with the touya characterization i’ve already got going on, so!! we’ll just use dabi.

warnings: 18+, pseudo-incest (stepcest), threesome, slight degradation, drug use (weed), dubcon/noncon, blowjobs/face-fucking (kinda implied???)

words: 2.2k

synopsis:

You nod, laughing a little and rubbing your face against his shoulder like a cat. He smells so good—has he always smelled this good? It’s making your mouth water—does he taste as good as he smells?

Would you like to find out, songbird?

Blinking slowly, you look up at him, eyebrows furrowing a little as you try to focus on his face. Did he just read your mind? Did he just speak to you through telepathy?

He’s gazing down at you with half-lidded golden eyes and a lazy smirk.

“You’re real cute, you know?” he looks up. “Dabi, bro, she’s really cute,”

      ✰          ✰          ✰          ✰          ✰          ✰          ✰          

“Please, niichan?” you’re using that high, whiny voice, the one you use when you’re begging for something, the one that really gets under his fucking skin, that he can’t stand, unless his cock’s buried inside you. “I’ll be good, promise!”

“Yeah, right,” he scoffs with a roll of his eyes. “The answer’s still no, sweetheart,”

“Ugh,” you groan, plopping down on his bed heavily as your lips push out into an adorable pout. “This is so unfair! You’re literally kicking me out of my own house. At least let me stay in my bedroom, I’ll—”

“Except you won’t,” he bites, sapphire eyes cold as he glares at you over his shoulder.

“Aw, c’mon,” Keigo collapses on the bed beside you, making your body jiggle a little and placing a large palm on your back, petting. “What’s the harm in letting her stay? She’s of age now,” he turns towards you. “You’re legal, aren’t you?”

You nod enthusiastically.

“And do you want to spend the entire night babysitting her?”

“I wouldn’t mind it,” Keigo responds with an easy smirk and a quirk of his eyebrows, expression steadfast even in the face of the fierce glare Dabi shoots him.

“Oh, Christ,” Dabi sighs, dragging a hand down his face.

“See—”

“No.” he snaps firmly. His eyes burn into yours, stare so intense it almost hurts. But then your chin begins to tremble, and your eyes glaze over with a thick barrier of tears, and you’re starting to make those cute little half-sniffle, half-whimper noises, and he blanches.  

No, not the tears—please, anything but the tears.

“But I j-just—” your chest hitches. “Just wanna spend a lil time with you, s’all,” Keigo coos to your left, sharp cobalt eyes darting to him, narrowed and seething. “Jus’wanna be with you for a bit, th-that’s it,”

And he can see it, the painful sincerity in your eyes, can see it in the way your nose twitches and your chest hiccups, in the way you bite down hard on your bottom lip to keep it from quivering.

Sometimes, he wishes you weren’t so goddamn genuine.

“C’mere,” he’s sighing with a defeated nod of his head, and you’re bouncing up before he’s even finished speaking. He shares a quick look with Keigo, who nods and takes that as his cue to leave, closing the bedroom door softly behind himself. “You’re such a brat, y’know that?”

“Mm, but I’m your brat,” you mumble into his chest, nuzzling against him.

“You can stay on one condition,” he begins, you looking up at him and batting your shining eyes in question, remnants of tears decorating your eyelashes. “I don’t want you leaving my sight, do you hear me? Wherever I go, you fucking go, got it?”

“Deal,” you agree readily, fingers tangling in his shirt as you pull yourself closer. He sighs again, and you can tell he isn’t happy about it, isn’t happy about allowing you to stay, isn’t happy about his inability to say no to his darling baby sister.

But every word of what you said is true—you just started your third year of university, and it’s taking up more of your time than you initially expected. Feels like you barely see him anymore, you’re whining into his chest, tears beginning to burn your eyes again. It’s not fair for him to kick you out of the house on one of the rare weekends you have free.

He can’t argue with that. It isn’t like he doesn’t want you around—he does; he’s missed you too, you know, even though it would be like pulling teeth to get him to admit it. It’s that he doesn’t want you around his friends. They’re sleazy, gross degenerates, absolute dirtbags, and they don’t deserve to be in the presence of his precious, pure angel.

     ✰          ✰          ✰

There are so many people—too many people—crowding your living room, so many unfamiliar faces you’ve never seen before, and you curl into your big brother, fingers knotting in his white t-shirt as curious, wide eyes drink in the scene around you. Dabi smirks, looking down at you and giving your shoulder a squeeze, a tiny bit too hard. You jump and pout up at him, and he laughs, eyes glittering.

The majority of the night is spent in his lap, leaning back against his chest as large hands idly rub gentle circles into your hips, fingers wandering up and down your thighs in nonchalant caresses as he talks languidly to his friends, and it’s just teasing enough to have you wanting more.

Many of the people surrounding you frighten you a little, and you pretend not to hear some of the girls’ obnoxious whispers as they pass by; they look a little close for step-siblings, don’t they?, opting to snuggle into your niichan instead. It’s cozy and familiar, a sharp pang searing through your chest when one of his hands moves to caress your hair, readjusting you a little in his lap and holding you tighter.

There’s a part of you that wishes he didn’t have this party at all, that wishes it was just the two of you, since it seems like you rarely get moments like that anymore. You would’ve rather spent the weekend your parents were away getting pounded into his mattress for two days straight, or fucking in the kitchen and the shower, spending the duration of the time they’re gone in nothing but his hoodie—no panties allowed, of course—like you used to any time they took a vacation.

But you can’t be selfish—you’ll take what you can get.

The living room’s hazy now, thick with smoke, diffusing the light shining from the lamps and making everything look softer. Everyone around you looks so loose, so relaxed, so cool as they exhale clouds of smoke. Restless, you wiggle a little and pout, whining against Dabi’s neck that you feel left out, that you just want a little, please?

You can hear some of his friends giggling, and it only makes you more embarrassed, heat rushing to your cheeks as you squirm in his lap and nuzzle into him.

A soft groan vibrates in his chest and Christ, he thinks, you’ve got to be doing that on purpose, grinding right up against his cock as you blink your eyes up at him, begging for a hit.

He won’t allow it, of course. No, if you want some, you gotta take it from his mouth, and his mouth only.

It doesn’t matter that there’s a ton of people around, a few of them staring incredulously as they murmur things behind their hands—he doesn’t fucking care.

Fingers thread through the hair at the back of your head, holding you still as he brings his face close to yours. Your mouth falls open immediately, obediently, and you can see the laughter dancing in his eyes at how pathetically eager you are.

It isn’t as difficult as you worried it might be, concentrating hard to inhale the smoke he’s slowly blowing into your mouth at the same speed that he’s exhaling it.

He tells you to hold it in for a moment, and you cough a little, not used to smoke in your lungs. Dabi’s looking down at you with shining, half-lidded eyes, ebony pupils outlined by a thin ring of blue.

“Again?” he asks, amused smirk tugging at the corners of his lips.

“Yes, please,”

He only does it three times, claims that that’s more than enough, and then he’s getting up, shifting out from under you and depositing you half in keigo’s lap, who laughs as he adjusts you to sit more upright.

You’re not even that high—not really, just a lil floaty, you think, and you kinda can’t stop giggling. It’s just that Keigo is so pretty, you just wanna be a little closer to him, wiggling into his lap completely, and everything he says is hilarious—but Keigo’s always been so funny.

“Feeling good, pretty girl?”

You nod, laughing a little and rubbing your face against his shoulder like a cat. He smells so good—has he always smelled this good? It’s making your mouth water—does he taste as good as he smells?

Would you like to find out, songbird?

Blinking slowly, you look up at him, eyebrows furrowing a little as you try to focus on his face. Did he just read your mind? Did he just speak to you through telepathy?

He’s gazing down at you with half-lidded golden eyes and a lazy smirk.

“You’re real cute, you know?” he looks up. “Dabi, bro, she’s really cute,”

Niichan’s back? You whimper for him, making grabby hands, but his eyes are narrowed as they dart between the two of you suspiciously.

She asked to taste me,

Did she now?

“Niichan,” you pout, whining out the word. It isn’t fair—you’ve barely had his full attention all night, and now he’s too far, much too far, and you tell him so—or at least, you think you do, because then he’s scooping you up into his arms and carrying you to his bedroom and—and is Keigo coming, too?

Niichan is talking, you know he is, can feel his deep voice vibrating against your body, though you’re having trouble concentrating on his words, especially when hiccupped giggles keep escaping your lips without your permission, drowning him out.

Niichan’s gonna share you tonight, okay? Only for tonight, princess, he’s saying as he lays you down on his bed. Two cocks should satisfy your insatiable need for attention, right, baby?

You hum in response, nodding your head a little, even though you’re not exactly sure what you’re agreeing to. But it doesn’t matter; you don’t really care to question it as tender hands—two pairs of tender hands—are removing your dress and panties, fingertips grazing your skin and leaving chills in their wake.

All you know is that everything just feels nice. Their fingers on your skin, in your mouth, in your pussy, it all feels so nice.

“Good, feels so good,” you’re whimpering around the two fingers stuffed in your mouth. You suck experimentally, giggling a little when a moan sounds from somewhere in the room. Someone praises you for being a good little whore, for drooling all over their fingers so well as they slip into your cunt with ease.

“Feels—” you cut yourself off with a gasp. “Good,”

Yeah, I bet it does,

That’s niichan, you think. Sounds a lot like him, but it’s hard to tell when knuckles are curling inside of you, and your little hole is fluttering, and someone’s playing with your clit, and God, her pussy’s so cute, dude.

You’re whining a little now that your mouth is empty, body arching off the bed just a bit, and aw, no, baby. Do you need something to suck on?

Hands are on you again, flipping you over and forcing you to hold yourself up on all fours. The head of a cock—a pretty cock, all smooth and velvety with a few prominent veins and a pretty pink tip—is nudging against your lips, your mouth falling open automatically. Someone praises you again and you preen, giggling around the cock stuffed in your mouth, a pleasant warmth spreading through your body.

Something’s pressing into your cute little cunt now, too, a soft groan sounding from somewhere behind you as nimble fingers flex on your hips, keeping you still as your hole stretches.

A moan gets caught in your chest, partially silenced by the cock now being thrust down your throat, hard, fast, rough, fingers knotted in your hair pulling as they force you to move your head.

But whoever it is in front of you—yes, it must be Keigo, niichan doesn’t taste like this, is just a hint thicker than this—doesn’t last long, cock shoved in your mouth throbbing as it spurts ropes of white down your throat. You’re choking a little as strong hands hold your head still, all wrapped up in your hair, but you’re doing so well, songbird and God, you’re so hot.

You’re mumbling something, drool and cum dribbling down your chin, though you’re pretty sure you swallowed most of it. Gold, shimmering, blazing gold, settles in front of you, cooing gently as fingertips clean your mouth and then mildly begin massaging your jaw, a stark contrast to the hips slamming into you from behind.

It feels good, so good, but it’s so much, too much, overwhelming your senses and making your head feel like it’s spinning, soft little moans falling from your lips as your niichan’s cockhead drags against that spot over and over, vision completely whiting out as your pussy clenches around him.

And then he’s asking you if you want his cum, and you’re babbling a little; yes niichan, of course you want to be filled up, yes please niichan, wanna be full from both ends, and yes niichan, I want your cum, I want so much cum, I want it leaking out of every orifice of my body.

Fuck, the word’s spit out brokenly as his hips stutter, cock pulsing inside of you as it fills you with hot, thick cum, and it’s so much, you’re sure it has to be leaking out of you, glazing your inner thighs.

Pain sears through your body, a special type of agony that burrows into your muscles and bones, that has you whining as someone pulls you against their heaving chest, fingers combing through sweaty hair. Your jaw is sore, hips bruised, pussy aching just a little, but you were such a good girl for your niichan, and that’s all that matters.