#behavior solutions

[soulbrand]

man you all were not kidding abt the therapyspeak in veilguard.

[applestorms]

(tw for extensive discussions of dubiously consensual sexual situations, typical to canon. also spoilers for the decay route update)

honestly, one of the most interesting aspects of andrew's psyche that we get to see in the most recent decay route update to me is his nearly unending hesitancy about having sex with ashley, despite both his overwhelming desire to AND her incredibly blasé, Yeah Sure Let's Do It attitude in response to the question.

while the end of the burial route provides some key insight into ashley's point of view regarding this topic (e.g. if you go with the less enthusiastic/more teasing answer to andrew's question of "we're not like that, right? right??"), and the shots & such ending provides even more intrigue into her motivations, i think that decay presents two key reasons as to why andrew has continued to hold back for so long: his two core conflicting desires, and an inability to see ashley as her own full person. notably, both of these parts can easily be connected to his mother's childhood abuse and parentification of him as well.

with regards to the first point: andrew has two main overwhelming desires at the heart of his character that motivate most of his actions, which unfortunately for him are completely incompatible. andrew wants:

to be a normal, average person-- someone who can hold a steady, respectable job, fit in at the block party BBQs, and not attract any negative attention from the neighbors.

to fuck his sister.

to some degree, you could even read the distinction between the two main routes themselves (burial and decay) to be motivated by whether or not andrew can diffuse the tension between these two wants-- in burial, he gives up on his need to fit in with the rest of respectable society, presumably pushing him more towards the fucking-his-sister route; in decay, he struggles significantly to let go of this desire for normalcy, and the stress almost always breaks him. notably, in neither of these routes can he fully give up on the second desire-- really, his relationship with julia and the rest of his life up til the point that ep1 begins has been about him trying and failing to do so, so this makes sense.

(sidenote: i would also like to clarify that i think the Most key distinction between these two routes comes down to the decision you actually have to make to get one or the other-- namely, whether or not the siblings are able to trust one another. but anyways)

this focus on the first desire for normalcy is also interesting in that it seems to be one of the core desires that renee holds as well, as we see her so happily boast about during their interactions in ep2. honestly i could probably write a whole post about how much andrew (consciously or, more often, not) mimics his mother's behavior and takes on her standards and ideals, but the key point to pay attention to here is the fact that andrew has subsumed his mother's viewpoint in such a way that he is either not fully aware of or simply hasn't questioned in all that much depth yet.

we can also see this with the aforementioned parentifiication, which has really interesting consequences on how much andrew does (not) see ashley as her own autonomous person. pretty much every single childhood flashback we get in 3a shows the same terrible cycle:

andrew is told by renee that ashley is His responsibility -> ashley causes problems on purpose -> andrew takes the fall for her

frankly, we don't even really need that first step for andrew to fully internalize the idea that ashley's actions are His to take responsibility for. the horrible consequences of this are also quite obvious: not only is this pressure to take responsibility for someone else's actions an incredibly unfair burden to put on anyone, much less a kid, but it also continually pushes andrew to see ashley as something less than human, or as little more than an extension of himself rather than her own person.

the main conflict in decay really comes down to this conflicting desire between the two of them, where what both andrew and ashley want above all else is Complete and Utter control over the other-- andrew wanting control because he has again been groomed to see ashley as his full responsibility, and ashley wanting control to assuage her own insecurities and fears about being isolated and hated forever. the more sympathetic throughline underlying a lot of this is that what both of them seem to want is safety, to protect both themselves and each other from any and all situations outside of their control-- though, unfortunately, a lot of times those exact external situations are simply the other acting on this mirrored desire for control lol.

anyways, going back to the sex thing-- since andrew doesn't see ashley as her own person, since he sees her as incapable of taking responsibility for her own actions and therefore as someone who cannot make decisions for herself, due in large part to him automatically transferring this burden to himself, andrew also sees ashley's consent as essentially meaningless.

the more sympathetic reading here is that andrew does genuinely want ashley to be at least kinda into it as more than a manipulation tactic/transactional thing-- but i think it's also equally likely that andrew simply doesn't want to have to once again shoulder the full burden of Committing Incest on his own, and he doesn't trust ashley to ever be even capable of taking the fall for her own actions. the fact that andrew still ultimately sees ashley as Leyley and NEVER as Ashley Proper (as he himself recognizes at one point) really just reinforces this to me. he says it himself-- he practically raised this woman. and in this case, even above all others, ashley's actions are quite literally also his own. it all goes back to that initial mistrust, and he carries that resentment with him even after they get around to actually doing it. mutually dubious consent, truly in-fucking-deed.

[jesterjaxx]

comic from a 2 month old conversation about Duntrent's first kiss being a shotgun to share a hit

Bonus Duncan when he gets home:

[sleepyminty]

Absolutely losing it that we are now able to be an absolute dick to abnomalities in the new mirror dungeon

Except for lost passenger

[pochiyaki]

@skrinleme & anyone harassing other RTVS community members.

If you continue, let this be known. The RTVS Moderation crew has been informed of messages like yours some of the community has been receiving. This behavior is not acceptable. YOUR ACTIONS DO NOT REFLECT RTVS OR ITS COMMUNITY. If an identity is found, you will be dealt with. You are not welcome in our spaces or community.

[wastinawaaay]

US politicians enabling hate crimes and war crimes and still acting like they have the moral high grand is mind blowing

[existence-is-a-liminal-space]

same people that reblog shit about there being no morality in death or how their against punitive justice will say that killing the league was the best end for them. y'all hear how you sound, right?

[avocado-frog]

Man I hate being able to read

[pokemonshelterstories]

What if your rotom records your snoring because its worried about you? We may think its funny, but imagine if YOUR human was lying there, not moving, choking and dribbling at 3AM.

my rotom used to overheat my phone until it shut down unless i let it play candy crush saga. i don't think that's what's going on.

[acuitybehaviorsolutions]

Achieve Amazing Social Skills Online Program | Acuity Behavior Solutions

Join Acuity Behavior Solutions' Achieve Amazing Social Skills Online Program to enhance your child's social abilities. Our expert-led, evidence-based approach helps children develop essential social skills in a supportive, engaging virtual environment. Enroll today to empower your child to build meaningful connections and thrive socially.

[neosatsuma]

stupid problems require stupid solutions. and brother, I'm a solvem probler

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

[garagepaperback]

innocuous

It’s not entirely different from learning a new language.

Or, maybe it’s closer to decoding a series of complicated runes. More like disarming a trap, blindfolded with three fingers on your wand hand tied tightly together with string. Draco ties the bow very neatly, at least. Painfully neat with two perfectly even loops. A gift-wrapped impairment, intentional, well-dressed. Failure served on a polished silver platter.

“Just tell me,” Harry argues the first time after an entire Saturday is lost to the glacier of passive-aggression. And, the second time. The sixth time. “Use your words.”

“Disgusting, childish, slovenly,” Draco says, face stone-carved, smooth. 

“I mean how you feel.” Harry bites out, “I can't automatically know what you're feeling-” The callus of his tone is peeled back, raw pink skin revealed underneath. “I statements. Like the therapist said.”

“I feel you’re disgusting.” Draco says, so slowly Harry has plenty of room to sink, second by second, into a vivid vision of strangling him. “I feel you’re childish. I feel you’re slovenly.”

“You’re so fucking dramatic. They’re socks.” Harry rolls his eyes, times one through six, and leaves.

The argument runs on a loop. Harry’s done and then Draco seals up the doors of himself, bolt sliding into strike, ears red. He retreats fully, up early and coming back to bed late. 

Standing in front of two black, balled-up socks, one on the floor, its partner jammed into the couch cushion, the seventh time, Draco’s hand goes up, sweeping in a wide gesture - Look, disgusting, childish - and then before he can actually put the words to breath, Harry grabs his hand, “I’m sorry, you’re right.”

Suspicious and un-won-over, Draco’s spine remains strictly structured and Harry goes on, anyway, turning Draco around, stretching up on his toes a bit to tip their foreheads together. “I know- you grew up in that huge, spotless mansion- it's gotta be physically painful, devastating probably, to endure something as awful as used socks on furniture. Maybe the worst thing that ever happened to you.” He’s getting there. Draco breathes a strangled laugh, only half-annoyed. Harry kisses him, threads one hand into his hair, and then pulls back, big grin in the small space between them. He does a terrible impression of Draco’s accent, “You poor, posh thing.”

That’s it - Draco laughs fully, leans in and kisses him, too.

It’s not a solution. It’s an ongoing endeavor, and so stupid - all those wasted hours of cold shoulders and vitriol-laced good morning’s - over fucking socks of all things. But that’s home, Harry supposes. That's doing this, for real. Lingering laundry and not a solution, always, but a way to move around it, to stay near and close and together, to keep from splintering apart with blame and whatever else.

The thought is thrilling and sudden: this could very well take the rest of his life, figuring this out, navigating the river with its rapids, curves, sudden shallows. What a dumb, lovely thing.

for day 7 of @microficmay

[meowww-ffxiv]

OK if your WoL got fantasia'd unexpectedly and turned into another race/version of themselves, how do the people who know them tell it is actually them? Mannerisms? The way they dress? Can the Scions tell?

[aro-culture-is]

aro culture is realizing that no matter how hard you try, you just lack the ability to see a lot of nuance in your friends’ romantic struggles beyond what logically makes sense… so you begin to space out whenever they enter lengthy conversations about dating struggles that you’ve heard over and over again, because the only response you can think of is ���that sucks” or “you deserve better, move on”. But these are probably best left unsaid, so you say nothing at all and let the alloros handle it

.