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#being bad or whatever
inkskinned · 1 year
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because sometimes there are invisible tests and invisible rules and you're just supposed to ... know the rule. someone you thought of as a friend asks you for book recommendations, so you give her a list of like 30 books, each with a brief blurb and why you like it. later, you find out she screenshotted the list and send it out to a group chat with the note: what an absolute freak can you believe this. you saw the responses: emojis where people are rolling over laughing. too much and obsessive and actually kind of creepy in the comments. you thought you'd been doing the right thing. she'd asked, right? an invisible rule: this is what happens when you get too excited.
you aren't supposed to laugh at your own jokes, so you don't, but then you're too serious. you're not supposed to be too loud, but then people say you're too quiet. you aren't supposed to get passionate about things, but then you're shy, boring. you aren't supposed to talk too much, but then people are mad when you're not good at replying.
you fold yourself into a prettier paper crane. since you never know what is "selfish" and what is "charity," you give yourself over, fully. you'd rather be empty and over-generous - you'd rather eat your own boundaries than have even one person believe that you're mean. since you don't know what the thing is that will make them hate you, you simply scrub yourself clean of any form of roughness. if you are perfect and smiling and funny, they can love you. if you are always there for them and never admit what's happening and never mention your past and never make them uncomfortable - you can make up for it. you can earn it.
don't fuck up. they're all testing you, always. they're tolerating you. whatever secret club happened, over a summer somewhere - during some activity you didn't get to attend - everyone else just... figured it out. like they got some kind of award or examination that allowed them to know how-to-be-normal. how to fit. and for the rest of your life, you've been playing catch-up. you've been trying to prove that - haha! you get it! that the joke they're telling, the people they are, the manual they got- yeah, you've totally read it.
if you can just divide yourself in two - the lovable one, and the one that is you - you can do this. you can walk the line. they can laugh and accept you. if you are always-balanced, never burdensome, a delight to have in class, champagne and glittering and never gawky or florescent or god-forbid cringe: you can get away with it.
you stare at your therapist, whom you can make jokes with, and who laughs at your jokes, because you are so fucking good at people-pleasing. you smile at her, and she asks you how you're doing, and you automatically say i'm good, thanks, how are you? while the answer swims somewhere in your little lizard brain:
how long have you been doing this now? mastering the art of your body and mind like you're piloting a puppet. has it worked? what do you mean that all you feel is... just exhausted. pick yourself up, the tightrope has no net. after all, you're cheating, somehow, but nobody seems to know you actually flunked the test. it's working!
aren't you happy yet?
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schizoaffectively · 1 month
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You are well within your right to be angry about the help you didn't get and should have gotten.
You are well within your right to be angry about having your needs neglected.
You are well within your right to be angry.
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breesperez139 · 4 months
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Dc x Dp Prompt #6
“I’m a twin”, Damian said one night. He could feel the narrowed eyes of his family drilling holes on his back in disbelief. Not that he could blame them. Damian had never so much as implied being raised with a companion, much less a sibling.
“I had a brother”. Damian paused to recollect himself. He had not said his brother’s name out loud in over 8 years.
“His name was… Danyal”. Damian hated the way his voice wavered, but he could not help it. Danyal was everything to him, his other half. Their heart beat as one and when one heart stopped beating, the other one died with it. At least until his family put his heart on metaphorical life support without ever realizing.
“Where is he now?” His father asked, voice filled with knowing grief and a hint of betrayal. It had in fact been 6 years since Damian first showed up on his doorstep.
“Up there”. All eyes shifted towards the specific star he was pointing to. “Right before he died, he promised me he’d guide me from the stars. Unfortunately, the stars are not visible in Gotham, so my brother is unable to be of much help unless I leave the city.”
“Your brother is Polaris, the North Star?” Tim questioned warily, most likely in attempts to not offend him. Damian was aware of how stupid it sounded, but Danyal had promised, and his brother never broke his promises.
“Yes. Danyal is with the stars now, just as he always wanted”
#dc x dp#dp x dc#dpxdc fanfic#dc x dp prompt#dp x dc prompt#dc x dp crossover#dp x dc crossover#ghost king danny#demon twin au#danyal al ghul#batpham#they are not in Gotham at the time of this conversation#I’m thinking they’re visiting the Kent’s on their farm but tbh as long as the stars are visible it can be anywhere#Danny did in fact reincarnate as Polaris#sort of#Polaris is more of a title the Realms gave him the day he was crowned#he is the star meant to guide them through a new era#or something like that#But Damian does look up at the stars for guidance whenever he sees them#and before he knows it he’s accidentally begun praying to Danny#it’s his coping mechanism for being unable to speak about him to anyone#but back to Danny - he regained the memories of his time as Danyal Al Ghul when he died in that portal and became a halfa#well it was more he regained the memories of ALL his previous lives but his most recent one holds a special place in his heart#if only because he knows his brother is still alive on whatever earth he was born on#as bad as it sounds Danny can’t wait until he gets to reunite with Damian#he hopes Damian forgives him for not guiding him though#fun fact! Danny was once known as the god Dan-El in one of his previous lives#he’s ALSO the reincarnation of the Greek Titan Astraeus (and he’s pretty sure Dani is his daughter Astraea)#his previous lives are all so interesting (he still can’t believe he was raised an assassin or that he was a god in multiple lives)#but in all honesty ​it’s even weirder feeling so old and so young at the same time
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sparrowlucero · 4 days
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i can't get along with pokemon fans they're always hating on all the good creature designs and clever zoological in jokes in favor of the dog with jorts
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priscirat · 7 months
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picked up my dungeon meshi reading again. kikimari
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yuwuta · 5 months
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you ask yuuta if he wants a bite of your food and when he says yes you offer your plate to him, but he’s just sat there looking at you with his dumb big bambi boy eyes and his mouth slightly open and he will not look away or blink or close his mouth until you lift your fork to his lips to feed him and then he grins like shit’s sweet and hums about how good the food is like nothing happened like he’s not ridiculously attractive. gonna chew on steel
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yrsonpurpose · 7 months
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Mary & George (2024) Episode 3 'Not So Much as Love as by Awe'
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twinstxrs · 7 months
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just now realized that kristen started off fantasy high choosing the path of doubt & uncertainty by choosing to go with the bad kids. for unrelated reasons i need to lie down forever.
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poorly-drawn-mdzs · 8 months
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Laios's three Boy Best Friends. And yes, they hate him.
#dungeon meshi#laios touden#toshiro nakamoto#chilchuck tims#kabru#BF in this context could be boyfriend or best friend. The line is so blurry.#Chilchuck less so but whatever is going on between Shuro and Laios & Kabru and Laios is giving strong:#“dude if you were a girl I'd date the hell out of you”. And from the genderswap extra's that sentiment is canon for BOTH.#This was made prior to the translation of the Laios & Kabru & Shuro restaurant date comic and honestly I am just feeling vindicated.#I don't even know what to call this dynamic other than a situationship. There is so much going on between all of them.#Even on a purely platonic reading - the miscommunication and male yearning for friendship hurt so bad.#When we got the Big Hug scene in the epilogue arc I was whooping and hollering! Pure catharsis moment!#I also don't like hugs very much so I really felt it went Shuro ('hates being touched') went in for the bear hug.#Do not get me started on the agony of 'always lying' Kabru telling the truth (I just wanted to be friends)#and 'always believes' Laios thinking it's another lie and brushing him off.#I am once again supporting dungeon meshi day by posting art. Please watch dungeon meshi.#obligatory edit because I’m tired: YES. Chilchuck cares for Laios and him admitting it was a huge part of his arc#YES he is more just fed up with him that actually hating him.#I needed a third guy to be canonically done with his ass for the THREE WEED SMOKING GIRLFRIENDS reference
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moonlitkissing · 7 months
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I want to ruin a boy with a mean domme friend soo badd
Poor thing being stuck between my praise and her degradation, not knowing who to listen to - maybe my friend gets really pushy, throws him around a bit, fucks him from behind until his head lands in my lap and she drags his face right to my center, telling him that good whores know their place without being shoved there first, and that he better hurry up
Meanwhile, I'm cradling his face and asking him if he wants to be my good boy, and wipe the tears from his cheeks - tell him how pretty he looks all fucked out like this and how good those cute whimpers would sound smothered between my thighs, don't you think, pretty boy?
Just - torturing a sweet boy for a bit
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cryoverlife · 1 month
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The Seven’s sexualities are as followed:
Leo: hot people (pretty much everyone), he definitely had a crush on everyone on Argo 2 like once even if it was for five seconds
Piper: Who Knows At This Point, anyone can be pretty as long as they aren’t jerks
Jason: thought he was straight and is now suffering cause he’s friends with Leo and Piper (not cause he has crushes on them but because they enjoy shattering his world view by asking him if he thinks *insert random person* is hot)
Bonus for Jason: might have a crush on Leo
Percy: Annabeth, not actually but he has her so he doesn’t actually care about finding out.
Annabeth: suffering (refers to the entire paragraph in MOA where Annabeth thinks about her entire love life and the only thing good about it was like three months), but also Percy cause no way he’s ever leaving her
Hazel: a poor oppressed child who didn’t even know Not Being Straight is a thing until now, has a type for the precious ones.
Frank: honestly the straightest one of the group but at this point nobody actually knows
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triaelf9 · 7 days
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"how do you enjoy *insert fandom here* I hear they're the worst"
Find the ppl who enjoy the thing you like the way you do. Ignore, mute or block the ppl who don't.
Ta-Da~
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cccotard · 7 months
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school day :p
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demaparbat-hp · 2 months
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No war au: first time meeting each other at a diplomatic event. zuko, crown prince of the fire nation kisses the hand of katara chief of the southern water tribe.
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Beyond diplomacy.
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sonknuxadow · 10 months
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its kinda funny that the chaotix are like the only characters who mention having to pay rent or buy food or whatever and theyll take any job that pays because theyre desperate for money but none of the other characters are struggling in this department at all even though most of them dont seem to have jobs. its like the concept of needing money to live exists for no one in the sonic universe EXCEPT for vector espio and charmy
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egophiliac · 9 months
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happy new year Ego!!! Just wanted to let you know that I absolutely adore your twst fanart and the tags are just an absolute pleasure to read! You are my greatest inspiration for my personal twst art and I just wanted to thank you for your wonderful masterpieces <333 if possible, may I ask what are some of your headcanons for the diasomnia family? If not for diasomnia then any other characters are fine as well!
thank you, and happy new year! 💚💜💚 that is amazing to hear; it's always a little bewildering but super flattering that other people like my silly little doodles so much!
I don't think I really have any really solid headcanons and also canon keeps validating me left and right (FLUFFY DOMESTIC DIAFAM IS REAL). mostly just kind of...impressions and general thoughts, if that makes sense! lately though I've been kind of obsessed with thinking about Lilia's hair, and specifically when/why he ended up cutting it. (l-look, we're bouncing around the timeline and I gotta make decisions about these things when I draw, it's relevant) (I mean I would probably be weirdly fixated on this anyway, but.)
I think I've settled on the idea that he kept it long until he went to NRC, partly because 1) I like drawing The Ponytail, and 2) I think he thought of NRC as a chance to reinvent himself a bit! he gets to go and be a wacky carefree teenager for a few years and have fun! (officially he's there to keep an eye on Son #1, but how much trouble could he get into, really.) so he gave himself a Cool Teen Haircut to go with his fresh new Cool Teen Persona!
also maybe he had some reflection on his hair's troubled past with three kids...
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...and had to weigh his vanity versus the fact that he was going off to be around hundreds of kids on a daily basis, and. the choice suddenly seemed obvious.
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#art#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 part 6 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 part 6 spoilers#this is my blog and i'm going to write a million words about lilia and you can't stop me#but anyway i do genuinely get the impression that he's using Pretending to Be a Teenager as a chance to be even sillier than usual#he's a very silly man he's just being EXTRA silly#supported by his recent birthday card where he says he was specifically trying to cast himself as an adorable little brother-type#because he wanted the other students to give him free shit and save him seats and things like that#it worked for about a week before he turned out to be way too good at stuff and everyone just kind of ended up in awe of him instead#and he was like DANGIT. I'VE RUINED IT FOR MYSELF.#(then he and epel went on to talk about their hypothetical vtubersonas because the birthday cards are INSANE but anyway)#i'm bad at headcanons :( sorry!#unless it's dumb things like...what pokemon they would have or whatever#(malleus would have some kind of special fancy-colored dragapult) (but i digress)#i have a hard time putting things into words. just know that i love the grampa bat and his weird kids very much.#my brain is also still kind of fried from the last couple of weeks#i am however starting 2024 off the way i intend to continue it: in deep contemplation of anime hair#(sorry if these look weirdly aliased) (i realized about 3/4 of the way through i was using the wrong brush and i didn't want to restart :U)
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