#bro for me is gender neutral.

[bylrndgm]

“yo, bro, who got you smiling like that?”

byler. definitely byler.

[mikichko]

little bit personal but i’ve gone through lots of weight fluctuations in my life and no matter what size i am, summer is always hard for me.

which is why i cannot stop thinking about being ghost’s partner through summer.

we already know that he’s a man of few words, prefers to observe more than anything. so he really doesn’t miss the meticulous way that you plan out your outfits.

shorts have to be a certain length, shirts have to be at least long enough to hit your hips and sleeves long that are up to mid bicep. hell, he’s even seem you choose to wear pants all summer instead of even attempting shorts. too anxious over how you’ll be perceived to let yourself enjoy a nice warm breeze on your legs.

he asks you once if you’re warm, approaching the conversation the best way he knows how, only to have you laugh and tell him that the pants just hold you better. don’t need to give people a reason to comment on your appearance. he nods and you seem happy that he’s happy with your response.

but he’s not. listen, simon’s not really one to jump to defend someone’s ego from being bruised. god knows the team rags on johnny too often for him to pretend otherwise. but this? nah, this is different.

he’s all too familiar with the way bodies react and absorb the shock and trauma of war. has seen soldiers of all shapes, sizes, identities tank hits like no one’s business. there’s absolutely nothing he despises more than for the untrained, ill informed cretins offering opinions on someone else’s body. specially if it’s ever directed at you.

he’ll never say this though. at least not outloud. though, his actions do speak for themselves.

small pats on your hips as he passes by you. wrapping his arm around your lower belly instead of your waist, you try to swat at him but he just pulls you back into him. insisting that he lays on you when you’re stretched on the couch, dropping kisses on your clothed belly while his hands draw patterns on your plush thighs. if he’s feeling cheeky he’ll sink his teeth into them just to get a little squeal out of you.

even in public he doesn’t ease up. pulls you into his lap in front of your friends, knows you love it despite your protests. lounging out on a patch of grass along the walking trail, he pulls you closer to him and has one of your legs draped over his. massaging the fat there as you chatter about nonsense.

idk simon riley just really loves you and loves the body that keeps you alive and feeds your personality.

[demonfamilytherapist]

MC Teaches the Brothers to Pole Dance

Inspired by me taking pole lessons. No real warnings - some of them are a bit suggestive, but that’s it.

Mammon

Most likely to injure himself. Not out of lack of strength - he’s just way too eager to impress you, so he tries more showy moves without getting the technique down first.

He also tends to throw himself into the spins more, which works fine when the pole is static (fixed), but when the pole is on spin he ends up with way too much speed.

Can get frustrated easily, but is also pretty quick at picking it up.

Tends to prefer moves that look impressive, regardless of their actual difficulty.

To show off, he sometimes shifts into his demon form mid-performance to stretch his wings and show off more interesting shapes.

Levi

Most nervous to start out with.

Needs a lot of encouragement to even give it a go. Won’t practice in front of his brothers - luckily, private lessons with you are a pretty good selling point.

He actually practices mostly in his demon form because his tail makes him feel more stable.

It actually does add a pretty good grip point to the pole. His scales are naturally inclined to hold on.

The more revealing clothing that’s kind of necessary for pole is another thing that makes him uncomfortable at first, but again, seeing you in just as little or less is another good selling point.

Once he gets past his initial nerves, his tail actually gives him a lot of flexibility on what he can do.

He tends to do variations on moves that allow him to rely more on his tail, since it’s his strongest limb.

Beel

Beel’s a natural and dedicated athlete, so he takes to pole very well.

He does need a few reminders on his technique - he can brute force his way through most things with sheer strength, and is often more focused on completing the move rather than performing it.

He sees it as a great way to bond with you. Once he figures out what muscles are most important, he’s really eager to discuss other ways to strengthen them so you can both improve.

He’s a really good doubles partner, since he can take the extra weight of you half hanging off him.

Prefers arm-based moves - while he can grip with his legs, he never feels as comfortable.

His wings don’t help too much with anything, but they can look very nice in the right lighting for a performance.

Asmo

Asmo is way ahead of you.

Well, sort of.

He has a good idea of the basics, but he’s generally only used it for fashion photoshoots and… private shows… neither of which really focused on a variety of moves.

That being said, he’s really enthusiastic to learn more with you!

He buys a lot of cute, very expensive pole outfits. He’s really eager to shop with you, too. Would love to match.

Asmo is a very fast learner. He’s stronger than he looks, so he’s able to physically do most of the moves right away. Mostly he just needs to refine his technique, and Asmo is a natural performer.

Anything that shows off his best angles is a good move in his book. He likes to have one arm free to blow kisses.

His wings are a wonderful accessory, and they’re also small enough not to get in his way.

Satan

Satan doesn’t really understand the point… But he’ll go along with it. It’s a good opportunity to learn more about you, and human world art forms.

It takes him a while to get the hang of it. His analytical mind is a blessing and a curse, helping him understanding the techniques and moves but often leading him to overthink in the moment.

Most likely to study up outside of your interactions - he’s the least thirsty guy following a bunch of pole dancers.

He tends to prefer slower routines that allow him to plan ahead and show off both technical skill and artistry. He’s also a surprisingly decent choreographer, probably only behind Asmo (with Levi being the other pretty good one).

He is banned from demon form on the pole. His tail is too hard and sharp, and could end up scratching it.

Belphie

It’s too much effort. And if it’s something Asmo’s that into, it can’t be worth much…

But if it’s that important to you, sure, he’ll give it a go.

Belphie is almost annoyingly good at pole once he starts taking it semi-seriously. He’s a fast learner, and keeps a cool head even when in weird and uncomfortable positions.

The biggest risk is when he falls asleep while on the pole and just… drops.

For this reason it’s best to avoid moves that are too stable or horizontal. He ends up being really dynamic just because otherwise he risks dozing off.

While putting this much effort into anything isn’t his usual style, he’s glad he gets to show off for you.

His tail isn’t grippy enough to be all that helpful, but it can be useful as a little extra support for some of the weirder positions.

Lucifer

Lucifer will not go to a group class with his brothers.

He will scoff and roll his eyes at the suggestion of a private practice.

But every time you’re with his brothers, he’s taking a close look at the moves.

In the evening, he returns to his room and summons a pole from the human world.

He practices every evening, sometimes giving up sleep. He keeps watching you practice, picking up more ideas and refining his skills.

Then, one day, while you’re trying to teach one of his brothers a certain move, he’ll walk up.

“It’s simple. Like this.”

He will do it perfectly. First try. And somehow in gloves and a full suit.

He is going to be smug about it for weeks.

[genacity]

can i request having sex with virgin!diluc? riding him and making him feel good just praising him and he can barely get a word out bc he feels so good

⌗ diluc riding dirty

cw. dom! gn! reader x sub! virgin! diluc. cock riding lololol, dumbification, praise, unprotected sex, use of “darling”, a little plot before porn, fluff @ the end because i need to write it more often lmao

an. gaww omg i love diluc… also new fic layout for my works LOL i kinda js wanted to try smth new.. anyways hope u like it cause this been on my mind 4 a while </3

the conversation was brief.

half a glass of whiskey down the hatch, many more to come. and already, you sat beside kaeya at the bar in angel’s share, snickering like a drunken lowlife.

“you, diluc ragnvindr, are a virgin?” you snorted, bringing your glass to your lips and drinking down the copper liquid. the rush of the whiskey burned your throat, its tangy aftertaste leaving your tastebuds almost shivering.

diluc grumbled and turned away, his actions making both you and kaeya cackle. “aww, is someone embarrassed?” kaeya giggled, words melted together. you could tell the multiple glasses of alcohol he had succumbed to earlier were taking a toll on him.

you teased poor diluc later into the night, but it only lasted for a few more minutes before kaeya had mentioned something else— something more important than humiliating the redhead in front of all of the visitors at the bar that night.

but you couldn’t stop thinking about it. so, you decided that maybe you could help him solve his little predicament. which is how you ended up here.

“c’mon, let me hear you…” you beckoned to diluc, leaning into his ear, voice barely above a whisper. you had him sprawled onto his own bed, naked, with your hands around his aching cock for the first time in his life. he gasped, bringing a hand up to his mouth the muffle the whimpers and groans he dared to let slip his mouth.

dissatisfied with his ability to listen, you pulled your hand away from his cock and sat up on your knees, shuffling around to straddle the poor man.

diluc looked up through his long lashes, mouth slacked open and eyebrows raised in hunger and disbelief. his stomach twisted into knots. feeling your body hover above his had him whipped.

“you ready?” you cooed, looking down at the gorgeous view. “yes— please, i want it, i want you—” diluc said shyly, a small smile appearing on your face before you pushed yourself down onto his cock.

“fuck!—” diluc sobbed out, his thighs tensing, head thrown back and mouth open. pathetic streams of sobs and whines filled the air, symphonies of pleas and mantras of begging following suit as you slammed yourself down on his dick repetitively.

your head hung low to watch the sight beneath you, your own lips parted to let out breathy pants and satisfied chuckles. “so gorgeous, fuck.. so pretty for me, darling.”

diluc could only whine, the feeling of your hole just too much for him to bare! you worked him so easily, it felt so good— his mind went foggy, all remaining composure slipping from his grasp.

“so good, baby. you’re being so good.” you grinned, putting your hands on his stomach to steady yourself. diluc moaned loudly at the feeling of your touch gracing his body, the ability to string words together completely gone.

“m—mmh! oh, i— i’m— fuck!” diluc sobbed, bringing a quivering hand up to his mouth. but the pleasure, oh the pleasure… it left him helpless, for all he could do is hover his hand over his mouth and just barely cover it. “no no, baby, don’t do that. lemme hear you,” you cooed, pulling his hand away by his wrist, a loud whimper escaping his lips.

diluc’s head began to spin, an unfamiliar feeling bubbling up in his lower abdomen. he opened his mouth to warn you, to tell you he was going to cum, but all that came out were incompressible moans and sobs of pleasure. “y—n!” he stuttered, just barely able to think. “cuh— mm! gon’— haah!”

he was almost there, he was so close— all he could do was chase his high hungrily. diluc bucked his hips up into your ass, eyes squeezed shut, body shaking. this feeling was nothing like he’d ever been used to before. the bubbling grew stronger, threatening to spill over and completely ruin you— ruin him.

“you gonna cum, ‘luc?” you purred, that familiar knot twisting in your stomach as well. diluc nodded, thighs trembling as you rode him out. “go ahead. cum.”

and at your command, diluc could only moan and take your order, waves of pleasure crashing down, spilling inside you. that spark of greed exploding in his stomach, gulping him down and swallowing him up, an almost euphoric feeling taking over his entire body.

you stilled yourself after your high, heavy breaths making your chest heave up and down. you looked down at diluc to see him completely ruined. bangs stuck to his face, long red locks scattering the pillow, long out of their high ponytail. the hair tie was probably on the floor.

“you okay?” you asked. he nodded, smiling softly. you grabbed diluc’s hand and brought his knuckles to your lips, leaving small kisses on his flushed fingers. “you did so well. i’m so proud of you. thank you for letting me do this.”

you lifted yourself off of diluc to put yourself beside him instead, pulling the covers over your bodies. he leaned into your chest, strong arms pulling you in as he quickly melted into your touch. your hands found their way to the back of his head, fingers intertwining with individual locks to wrap them into weak curls before letting them slip into their original wavy state.

diluc sighed and looked up at you, amber eyes glimmering with love as they hung low. even if he was tired, he still needed to say something before he went to sleep. he smiled, snuggling into you before saying something that made your heart sigh.

“i love you, y/n. please, don’t let me go.”

[mearcatsreturns]

I have a bookstagram, and I recently followed someone because they posted about the overconsumption issue that most bookish social media seems to have. Today, though, they posted another controversial "opinion": that listening to audiobooks isn't reading, and people who claim to have read a bunch of books that they listened to as audiobooks are lying and/or deluded. Listening to audiobooks, she said, is just consuming books.

I disagreed in a fairly politely worded reply, and I intend to unfollow/block, because I find it unlikely this person will change their mind, especially since I'm far from the only person to point out that this is exclusionary and ableist. But this is tumblr/my house, and now I'm going to be as blunt as I want to be.

I'm a librarian and archivist. So much of the work I and others in my field do focuses on making books and reading more accessible and less exclusionary. It is, in fact, incredibly ableist to negate how important audiobooks are for people who have certain disabilities or challenges, and I would in no universe say they aren’t reading. For that matter, a busy person who only has time for audiobooks and for people who just prefer them--it still counts, as far as I'm concerned.

See, there's a difference between an audiobook and a podcast or long song or radio program. An audiobook is still a book--it was written with a particular narrative structure, and the author plays a defined but limited role (once the book is written, it's written; the author isn't tuning in next episode with comments and corrections based on what listeners said). An audiobook is a book, ergo, listening to one is reading. Using braille is reading, and listening to audiobooks is reading.

The part that has me in full Captain Raymond Holt "apparently that is a trigger for me" mode is that this bookstagrammer called listening to audiobooks consumption. In the context of her other posts about overconsumption as an issue in the bookish community (again, agree, but also...mind your own business), this seems particularly insidious to me. Conflating influencer-driven (and capitalist hellscape) consumption with listening to an audiobook (again, a massive boon for the visually impaired and those with disabilities like ADHD, dyslexia, etc.) is rude at best and dangerously exclusionary at worst. Stop letting comparison be the thief of joy; mind your own business and stop looking at the pages that bother you. Focus on the kindness of leaning towards inclusion, meeting people where they are, and leaving judgment behind.*

*This person also said "feel free to comment if you disagree but please don't be mean or judgmental," as if they hadn't just posted the most ableist and judgmental sludge I've seen today.

tl;dr: don’t be a gatekeeping shithead, mind your own business, and

(gif by matalyn on tenor, couldn't find on tumblr)

[valsdelulucorner]

there's this bug I used to get in NB

the Mammon file doesn't exist in NB lol. self aware! au vibes?

BRO IVE BEEN WANTING THIS CARD SO BAD BUT I DIDNT GET IT, crying at the club right now

But 100%, imagine they saw you install NB and got jealous of their ai counter parts so they got rid of them and replaced them, adding cards you liked back in the og obey me so you can still have fun and enjoy the cards on devil gram in NB.

I actually might write about that

[rocketonthemoon]

Rocket's Transmasc* Pride Push-up Challenge

Inspired by this post and my own need to start exercising more I've decided I'm gunna do a push up challenge for Pride! And y'all should join me!!

The idea is Extremely Simple: how many push-ups can you do today June 1 vs. how many can you do June 30! And then come tell your favorite transbro, Rocket!

Wanna do them every day? Awesome! Maybe only do a couple a week? No problem! Want to just improve your form/transition from wall push-ups to inclined to knees to full plank push-ups? Hell yeah let's do it!

It's pride and summer and we deserve to get the chest/arms/shoulders we want. No matter where you start progress is progress and that's what we're going for!

Before typing this post up hit 15 in a row so my personal goal is getting to 25 consecutive push-ups by June 30 but even if I get to 20 I'll be super happy with myself! Hopefully I can keep this up and I'll let y'all know how I'm doing throughout the month and please come let me know how you're doing!

*not trans/masc exclusive. I, Rocket J. Onthemoon am a masc trans dude and thus naming it after me. All identities and expressions welcome and encouraged to join in!

[jellijellybean]

nsfw takes on some [JJK] characters mdni

don't laugh at me alright. im soft and mushy most days so there's no hardcore kinks in this one gang. ngl sometimes i get really nervous about posting my writing but then i remember i used to write on quotev when i was fourteen and feel arguably worse. as always put your ages in bios please and thank you. [word count: 2.1k]

warnings: nsfw. slight choking (gojo), overstimulation (receiving w/geto), alcohol mention (shoko), uhh none for (nanami) i believe, nails/scratching (utahime), oral (tojo)

a/n: this was written to be gender neutral. i might do the curses next because i am but a humble sukuna enjoyer (its such a shame he's always on my mind and never on me.)

Gojo:

I feel like he's the type to set the pace real gentle and slow. He doesn't get the opportunity to shower you with his affection as much as he'd like, but when he does it leaves you breathless.

He drags his palm up towards your neck so he can cup your face in one of those big hands of his. His lips don't stop ghosting over your neck as he trails kiss after kiss until he's brushing against your lips while the hand cupping your face suddenly trails down to carefully wrap his long fingers around your throat.

The squeeze is almost too faint to feel, but your head spins regardless and the chuckle that rumbles through his chest at your reaction makes your stomach explode with butterflies.

His favorite thing though?

Loves it so much when you wrap your legs around his waist, he loves the feeling of your arms wounding tight around his shoulders, how he's practically engulfed by you.

Seriously. He just loves the way you feel when you're here clinging to him down to the right amount of pressure, always leaving him dizzy from the rush he gets. When you whisper his name over and over again he feels invincible.

All the responsibilities, the pain, and sorrow can wait, everything, all his worries, all his hurt can fade into the background when your fingers brush through his hair, repeating soft, "I love you's,” into his mouth until your voice fades and his breath hitches.

Geto:

A tease through and through.

The type to whisper that he wants to hear what you want, all the filthy things that enter your mind, he wants to hear it all. Purposely, leaves you begging for more just so he can repeat the words of, "..say it for me one more time," before he thinks of continuing.  He's a bit more calculated with how well he sets the pace too.

Geto’s the type to observe your reactions, see how well you react to the way he slides in, how much pressure he'll need to use to have your legs shaking, and how sensitive you are to his touch. He takes his time to explore and learn just how to make your body sing.

You'd almost be startled by how often he focuses entirely on the way you feel when you're with him. The way you squeeze your eyes shut or when you try to pull him closer has his heart about to burst with the adoration he feels for you at that moment.

Be warned though, because of the pause he takes to admire you, to spend a few moments worshipping your very being — he'll absolutely overstimulate you afterwards, badly.

He might whisper that he's sorry, but he's almost there.. you can take a bit more, can't you? He got so distracted by you, he can't help it! The twitchy feeling below your stomach soon boils into burning pleasure when he continues the pace of his thrusts. He's kissing you, smothering your lips with kiss after kiss until your hands shake and your back arches once again.

Geto chuckles at the way your body tightens just right around him and he can't stop himself from cupping your face and holding it steady enough to keep your lips locked tight together.

Sigh. Isn't he so romantic?

Shoko:

You'd have to be the one to suggest anything, she's a busy woman with a packed schedule that leaves her exhausted.

Maybe, you decide to surprise her with a home-cooked dinner when she walks through the door and you finally get to see her tired smile as she tells you, you didn't have to.

You say it's the least you can do with the same bright grin you always wear and as you pull out the wine bottle kept safe for nights like this she caves and takes her seat right across from your own. Shoko's very thankful for your presence when you begin to talk about your day while she sits there and listens. A few drinks later and a quick movie leaves you guys on the couch, Shoko hovering above you as your hands rest against her hips.

The movie is long forgotten when you leave little nips and soft kisses against the sorceress' neck. Her shirt, slowly being pushed up and over her head just so you can continue to worship her delicate skin and watch the bites, scratches, and hickeys on her body slowly gain color.

Shoko’s more relaxed if anything, not really in a rush to get to where she needs to go. She is the type to really savor the moment as she tends to get lost in the way it feels the closer she gets to being pushed over that edge.

Something tells me she's also big on using her hands — mainly to touch your skin. Cup your face and trace the scars that you received from the time before you knew her. She even enjoys/savors the heat from your body as it slowly warms up her icy hands, and to Shoko, it's a constant reminder that you're here.

With her.

It keeps her grounded, especially after a long day of seeing sorcerers in different states of agony. You're her rock and she couldn't feel happier with anyone else, after all, you're all she needs in this world.

Nanami:

Nanami is a bit harder for me to calculate, but he gives very solid and strong vibes, give me a second to explain. Feels like his pace would be as steady as can be.. in the sense that he doesn't necessarily change it much. You might feel him get a bit rougher the closer he gets, really wanting to press deep, but he mostly keeps himself stable and has pretty good stamina overall.

Not the type to really get lost in the moment, but he tends to bask in the way his muscles tense and then how his body relaxes after he climaxes. He's a bit more on the quiet side too, not into talking too much but more into soft sighs and heavy breathing.

Don't expect his pace to be erratic unless you purposely tease him throughout the day — you'll know what's about to happen when he suddenly clasps a hand on your shoulder, pinky close enough to your neck he'd be able to caress the skin if he wanted to. He's ruthless, but still.. restrained in a sense until you goad him a bit more — keep babbling about whatever, tease him until you see the cracks in his self-control.

Man's will be talking then, whispering how exactly you affect him. How you invade his mind on days he needs to focus, how you're always there regardless of what he's doing.

When he's at work he wonders if you're awake. In the car he questions whether you've eaten or not and even when he's dealing with curses he thinks back to you.. at home waiting for him and he finds himself being a bit more careful.

Calculated and calm.

He needs to get home to you after all. Nanami tends to be a little more looser, letting out moans and groans more freely, his deep voice leaves you shivering. He normally falls asleep after nights like these though, arm wrapped taut around your body, making sure to keep you close to his chest. Just hold him tight and whisper that everything will be okay — he'll fully believe you.

Utahime:

Alright, something about this lady just gives me.. brat vibes (if you can say that.)

She won’t be downright mean to you but will do anything to get a reaction out of you so to speak. I’m talking when you guys are training and she manages to knock you down to the ground with a bright grin on her face all while exclaiming that she beat you!

Utahime can laugh and giggle all she wants about her victory and she might even say that you let your guard down, that you didn’t give it your all, and that you lost — to her.

It might make your blood boil a bit when she says those words to you, a slight tremble in your fingers as you reach for her arm to tug her down.

Now it’s your turn to laugh at the shock on her face, the way she whispers that your tactics are dirty, and the fact her face flushed at the realization of just how close you two were. You’re practically on top of her! She says it with a slight glare but your hands slip under her shirt before she even has a second to open her mouth again. It's funny watching, almost entranced, as her eyes widen before she tries to squirm away.

She stares, jaw slack, as the grin grows on your face when you throw a teasing remark back to her that gets her blood boiling all while teasing her chest. Utahime begins to take this as a challenge — to see who’s the real loser and before you realize it, girl has you flipped over with her hands underneath your shirt. Her strength surprises you as she slowly clambers on top of your body, feeling the way her nails ghost across your skin before digging into your shoulders.

Oof yeah, the nails are something she uses — often. Talking deep scratches along your back and shoulders that burn with an almost addicting pain, might even leave imprints when she cums with how hard she digs them into your skin. Sometimes it has you worried she’s drawing blood lol.

I also get talkative vibes from her, like she whispers soft curses and small threats like, “If you stop.. I’m going to kill you.” (LMAO) but the majority of the time, when you guys aren’t at each other’s throats, she’s a real softy with her words.

Very open about how good you make her feel and will gladly tell you so, but be warned because she expects the same energy back.

Honestly, just tell her how much you love her, how badly she affects you, and just how often she’s on your mind and I promise she’ll be eating out of your palm in no time because.. really.

All she wants is someone to love and appreciate the way she is without the need to hide any part of herself and look who's perfect for that.

Toji:

You guys probably met at some bar that served cheap booze and different types of filling foods. The screens on the tv’s playing random sports or the news or even some random cartoon — it’s overstimulating and you don’t even realize it until the sound of someone shuffling beside you is enough to drag your attention away.

The man doesn’t seem to acknowledge you but yawns very openly, you swear you’d be able to hear it if the people chatting weren’t so loud. Toji on the other hand, noticed you from across the room. His first thoughts were that you were cute looking, not really meant to be on this side of town without a reason, so he decided to sit next to you and see if you'd be interested in conversation.

(I can’t describe it but Toji to me doesn’t really give romantic vibes, but he’d still be at least somewhat considerate of your comfort and pleasure.)

Don't expect kisses to the lips and soft pillow talk, expect a bite to your ear and him forcing you to wrap your legs around his waist. Just ti keep himself hunched over your body until he's practically engulfing you and everything you are. Has a mix of having such a ruthless pace that leaves you gasping for air each time he bullies his way inside and then having the slow and lazy one with how gentle he rocks his hips into you when he feels like switching it up.

He won't admit it but he loves the fact you can never seem to hide the noises he drags out of you — it's a song only he's able to hear and that leaves him on cloud nine.

Might catch him lying on his back afterwards, staring at the ceiling with a somewhat blank look on his face. You might think that's it. That he's got what he wanted and is about to leave and never speak to you again, but the truth is, he's not sure how to ask if you'd be interested in meeting up like this again and again and again.

It's been a while since he's actually slept with someone he feels like he has good compatibility with and that's hard to find in this day and age. Won't say anything about it but you'll find it kind of weird when you slowly begin to see him around a bit more. Maybe he's walking down the street or standing in line at the grocery store and you see him again.

Call it fate or whatever but he draws you closer, like a moth to a flame. You'll learn about his thing with oral as time goes on. Loves the way you sound with his fingers in your mouth or when it's been such a rough day all he needs is you, on your back, trying to shove his head away while you beg and plead for some mercy.

It's honestly his favorite pastime. Let's just hope you two don't get into anything too frisky because my man is shameless and all I can say is godspeed soldier.

[kirby-the-gorb]

[shinjisdone]

To Soften a Warrior's Heart (Vinland Saga; Thorfinn; Part 1)

Going insane over Vinland saga - and Thorfinn headcanons of him getting close/finding a friend (┛◉Д◉)┛彡┻━┻ (based on season 1, which I haven't even finished but its taking oVER MY BRAIN):

In which you have joined Askeladd's band...and grow closer to the Son of Thors. Though it is more difficult than anyone can could ever imagine...

[Headcanons of how it would be like to meet and crawl your way into Thorfinn's heart (based on season 1; both platonic and romantic)]

Part 2 is here - meeting Thorfinn at 16/17 years old and growing closer to him, slightly following s1 events

Part 3 is here - Thorfinn slowly feeling comfortable with you and considering you a friend

Part 4 is here - Thorfinn unwittingly opening his heart as he realizes he does not want you to die

Part 5.1 is here - sweet things Thorfinn would do for you (headcanons)

Part 5.2 is here - other sweet htings Thorfinn would do for you (headcanons)

Part 6 is here - Becoming Canute's guard while Thorfinn accepts your relationship and bond

Part 7 is here - Canute grieving over Ragnar and Thorkell catching up; Thorfinn leaves you alone for revenge

Part 8 is here - Thorfinn wins against Thorkell; Questioning your bond with Thorfinn

Part 9 is here - Meeting Leif and Thorfinn dueling Askeladd; Losing while Askeladd told him the truth of his constant losses

Part 10 is here - Thorfinn and you bound by heart; Promises of Vinland broken and abandoned

okay, okay, just bear with me here;;;;

We all know that Thorfinn throughout these 11 years has been alone AND lonely (even though I think he wouldn't be aware of it nor admit to it) even though he has been around Askeladd's band for so long. He's cold and crude, rejecting all kinds of possible connections, which at the end of the day cannot even be real connections considering all men there are war-loving warriors who live for the thrill of battle - and the one who doesn't is Askeladd, his father's murderer who uses Thorfinn as a tool.

So just - i m a g i n e with me. Thorfinn...building connections. Having a bond...while still being the piece of sht like he always is (I know that happens in season 2 (I think) but...just, let him have someone :,) No matter if platonic/romantic :,) Just...let this kid be okay;;;;)

[Mentions of murder, death, war, slave trade, violence against women and whatever awful things happened in the viking era. Only mentioned and used as examples. Mostly gender-neutral examples but female-leaning ones are there, too.]

Harsh beginnings (14 years old)

So, obviously, you'd have to meet while Thorfinn is still in the band. Having two children ranging from the age of 6-13 be vikings and kill people is....unlikely????? At least in the plot.

So here comes my brainrot and stupid headcanons but:

Either you meet where he was about 14 or when he was about 16-17 years old.

I think the later you meet him in these 11 years, the harder it is to build a connection, let alone trust with him since these cruel years have hardened his heart. And as a 14 y/o (or at least around that age range) Thorfinn was seen to be more willing to help civilians who he saw as bystanders (the english woman and daughter). He is NOT innocent at that age in any regard but perhaps during that time he still hadn't shackled that hopeful child in his heart.

You become part of the band for whatever reason. Your home was raided, you escaped slave trade or you see yourself as a warrior. Askeladd saw something useful in you - no matter if that was strength, wit, knowledge of foreign languages or talent for any skill that there is. You can be a useful chess piece and a good replacement for the men he had lost throughout the years. If not, it certainly won't be a loss for him.

Your reasons and goal for joining would not matter. You are just another face being here. Either you'll be here for a long time or not. It doesn't matter. Everyone dies. As long as it is Askeladd dying by Thorfinn's hand, he won't care for you.

The only thing that would be peculiar and worthy of his attention (at least for a moment) would be that you and him are about the same age - in this example, 14 years old.

I believe either Thorfinn wouldn't care after that and ignore you - or he would raise a brow and pout as usual, asking you what a kid his age is doing here. Are you a warrior? One his father would describe? In his dreams?

You can give him your reason (it just can't be revenge, that's his thing). For survival, for power, you're searching for someone/something or for simply wanting to be a viking. Thorfinn would shrug at this, thinking the more emotional/rational reasons just show how you're probably not the only one with such an ambition. The world is cruel and it seems like you're the product of its actions. If your reason is a bit more simpleminded or even selfish, he'd scoff at you.

Nevertheless, he would never think of you as stronger than him.

Perhaps due to his young age he would act more childish and irrational. Every comment you give needs a comeback, no matter if it is ill-mannered or just talking for the sake of talking. He'd find himself accidentally replying to you or even seeking conversation because you are about the same age as him. Never would he see you as a friend though. Thorfinn in general, no matter how old, is too absorbed in his thirst for revenge that it is hard to find a place for any other thing in his heart, both positve and negative.

In the morning, he trains to be able to kill Askeladd (which at that age, I believe duels with him are seldom due to his height and age). At midday, he hunts for himself to survive. At night, he is plagued by his dreams of his father. There isn't much place for anything else.

The boy would be more open to kind people in general. It happens unwittingly. Thorfinn doesn't truly seek out company but humans are social creatures, no matter how strong or stoic or cruel he may become. He's still a child before any of that.

However, he would find you odd to be kind and to be part of a viking band. Part of him believes you don't belong here. Another part prefers you like this.

You'd have to initiate conversations most of the time but younger Thorfinn might do so too, at least compared to when he is older. It usually concerns problems regarding the situation or questions about Askeladd and his decisions. Thorfinn is reluctant to tell you about Askeladd and his father and prefers to bark out brief explanations ("He's a bastard."; "He isn't my leader and I am not listening to him. I'm here to kill him so don't get in my way!").

Very open to criticize you but mostly about fighting stances or decisions made during battle. He thinks he doesn't know enough of what the right decision is with and about people (again, the incident with the English woman) or what it means to be a true warrior yet - a definition he won't be certain about even in the future. Instead he keeps his mouth shut about your moral choices and prefers to watch. The most he would do is ask you why you did that/said that. At best he'd inquire more, at worst he'd only hum, ponder about it for a minute before tossing the thought aside until a similar situation arrives.

BUT if you were to point out his flaws, ooohh, you can expect a snappy and bratty 'shut up!' from him real quick. The boy is defensive, especially when it comes to being a 'true warrior' or when he loses to Askeladd time and time again. If you try to help him with criticism, he'll brush it off or physically shove you away. It doesn't matter if you mean it in a condescending or helpful way, he wouldn't listen.

Regarding the battlefield, it truly depends on your talent and skills whether or not you'll be paired up with Thorfinn.

It's known Askeladd uses him as bait or to do the dirty work of the job but if he sees you as useful, he might pair you up. Again, it depends on the skills and situation.

Nevertheless, Thorfinn wouldn't like it.

He's used to work alone, too used even. He doesn't want and need help, in fact he believes you'd be a liability, which can partially be true. However, if Askeladd suggested it, surely he must have a plan...that's what most of you think at least.

Thorfinn would just cuss at the man, claiming his choice is stupid and he doesn't need help. He can do it alone.

The often you have a job together, the less he'll complain. He won't look forward to it (having you along doesn't make killing any more enjoyable no offense) but he'll silently agree. (Heavens forbid you mess up though. If you mess up and somehow survive, you'll surely get an earful of Thorfinn of how weak and useless you are, no matter what Askeladd might say. Just...be careful).

Now, they could be certain reactions/actions that might be different if you are female.

Female vikings were indeed real but their victories and deeds were not as often written down, at least compared to male vikings. Nevertheless, having a female, much less such a young one, a child, be part of a viking band (especially Askeladd's!) did leave a lot of the members with uneasiness and hanging jaws.

Thorfinn would raise both brows at that. Whether or not you are recruited did not matter and there wouldn't be much of a difference on how he would think of you and treat you - its just the fact that you are a girl makes him wonder to be frank.

I like to believe Thorfinn is very much aware of things. Of what it means to be a viking and what that could mean for a girl...not only the viking life but also just the lifes of women who just exist in this world.

Yet at the same time...he is kind of blunt. Thorfinn doesn't mince his words so he will directly ask you what the hell you are doing here. Don't you know it's dangerous?

A part of him thinks you're dumb for joining but another knows you probably have a good reason to. Perhaps this is your only way of survival, or whatever your goal is...

Still, he does not treat you any differently and he doesn't see a reason on why he should. He is aware but won't make any attempt to act different.

Maybe his criticisms will be more frequent and harsher because you are female. Why are you fighting? You aren't as strong as him. You think yourself a warrior? Girls don't fight. (Sometimes it goes into the bully boy logic where it's like 'duh, you cannot do thaaat. You're a guuuuurl'. Yes, he can be dumb like that. It happens not so often though - perhaps it comes from the life he used to have when he was younger. Where everything was easier and he always knew his sister and mother to be safe at home with father...and not fighting.)

He will be more harsh when pointing out your flaws when it comes to the battlefield. In general he wouldn't see you as stronger than him and he definietly would not if you are female. Later in due time he realizes that fighting for you probably means winning yet another day to live. So he shuts up after a while.

Afterwards he will only tell you to watch out.

As another young member of the band, you can expect the others to interact with you and comment on you as well. Things will most likely be the same as it was for Thorfinn, the men either giving neutral to mean-sounding comments, taunting you, or even be impressed by you due to you still being a child. None of them will be nice, as you can imagine though.

Some might even comment how you and Thorfinn are 'such good buddies!' The blonde will deny it with barks and shouts before going back on cleaning his dagger. No, you aren't 'buddies', you aren't 'friends'. You are just...someone tolerable to talk to and be with.

For whatever reason the thought of you two being friends bothers Thorfinn. He cannot explain why, it is an slightly uneasy feeling growing in his chest. Perhaps a defense mechanism or believing he cannot be close to people anymore. Either for his lack of trust in people or because the death of his father, who he was so close to, made him believe bonds aren't possible anymore. How can it be when something as close as a bond between a father and son was severed by the cruelty of men so easily?

Willingly calling you a friend...that's something Thorfinn can't do. Not yet.

Though you can imagine it gets worse when the band hops from 'buddies' to 'crushes'. The chances of that happening is very, very, very, very low but some newby birdbrain might think of calling you two that. The others would laugh while Thorfinn would point his dagger at the fool. He wouldn't outright hurt them, but he is definetly more pissed off than being called your 'friend'.

Thorfinn is here to kill Askeladd. He doesn't have time to 'play around' and 'catch feelings' and certainly doesn't have the time to listen to an idiot's rambles. The boy feels free to cut off their tongue though if they prattle for too long.

Again, if you're female, there will definitely be more comments about you, you can count on that. More taunting, more men looking down at you, calling you names and yes, grown men talking to/about an 14 y/o in disgusting ways. Sorry, but this was 1012 a.d and they are vikings.

Thorfinn is, as mentioned, very aware for his age. And while he will not make any attempts to help or protect you (he will in future once you become important enough), this behaviour will actually make him despise the band even more than he already does. There has always been a feeling of indifference for them. He could not care any less if they died right then and there but hearing and seeing this makes his blood boil. Even moreso if Askeladd does nothing to stop it.

They are not acting like true warriors in his eyes.

In general a younger Thorfinn would act more childish but more tolerable around you. He's defensive and brash and is usually very grumpy when responding to any kind of negativity. He is unwittingly open to kind people but is drowning in his obession of revenge at such an young age already, that the mere thought of you and him being friends (which is usually normal and easy for preteens) does not ever cross his mind. He cannot get a grasp on that concept, that's how deep he is in his revenge. Even if you do get along well it just - does not work for him. Please, don't blame him. The boy can't help it.

[Part 1 of so much brainrot. Vinland saga is living rent-free in my head. Askeladd...Thorfinn...PRINCE CANUTE OMG BRO THE MEANING OF LOVE I CANNOT-

...I just...need to talk about it...pls...it has become like air to me, I nEED TO TALK ABOUT IT]

[Part 2 will cover a little bit of your relationship when you're older but met when Thorfinn was about 14 y/o...and afterwards the difference when you meet at 16/17 y/o.

And man, the parts afterwards or whatever I'm gonna write whenever is gonna be aaaaalll about Canute's and Askeladd's journey and them being involved in your relationship with Thorfinn...not to mention HOW YOURE GONNA CRAWL YOUR WAY INTO THORFINNS HEART NO MATTER IF HE LIKES IT OR NOT. HE IS GONNA HAVE A FRIEND IM TELLING YOU]

[sawamono]

In your Genshin NSFW HC post (part 2 in particular), you mention Kazuha being a little perv who would cum in his pants from being slapped… I request this to be expanded on now LOL

Just imagine him on his knees looking up at you with those poor, needy puppy dog eyes just begging to be slapped ashdkflfjdhsi

warnings: nsfw, MINORS DNI, slapping, stalking(?), perversion , kazuhas a freak lol, obsession, dacryphilia(? he cries idk)

notes: i love perv! kazuha you don't understand!! i orignially had something else to write about in the works but this ask is way too delicious to pass up <33

perv! kazuha is such a little freak <33 i imagine he’s a bit like how i perceive childe, a little bit too obsessed with you, and a sucker for pain.

perv! kazuha probably strokes his cock to pictures of you that you didn’t even know he took, imagining you were there with him.

perv! kazuha watches you fight from behind a tree, admiring the way your body moves. you can feel him staring at you but you think nothing of it. little do you know, the little perv his humping the tree, completely enthralled with your sweaty body.

perv! kazuha doesn’t even stop when you catch him. in fact, he quickens his pathetic thrusts as you watch him, degrading and calling him every name in the book for being such a weirdo.

perv! kazuha who begs you for even the smallest bit of physical contact. he looks up at you with glossy eyes, pleading for you to do something, anything so he can get off.

perv! kazuha cums in his pants almost immediately when you slap him. his back arches as he soils his pants, tears falling down his cheeks in fat globs as he mumbled small words of appreciation.

perv! kazuha who had waited for this moment since the day he met you, crawls up to you after such a harsh orgasm and latches onto your leg, begging you to hit him again.

perv! kazuha who won’t leave you alone until you do, moaning out with each strike.

perv! kazuha feels himself coming closer to yet another orgasm after just a few slaps, the lingering sting on his cheek fading into pleasurable feel.

perv! kazuha who felt himself dizzying and almost falling over, completely drunk off of your touch, even if it was a few hits.

perv! kazuha who makes a mess of himself once again as you step on his cock, finishing inside his pants once again.

perv! kazuha completely ignores the uncomfortable feel of his dirtied pants and looks up at you with tear stained cheeks and a large grin, collapsing against the tree in his own filth.

perv! kazuha who watches you even more closely from that point on, completely and utterly obsessed with you.

[beels-burger-babe]

Where I Can't Follow

***We had this moment that just happened in one of my D&D campaigns that I think would make such an amazing moment with Barbatos and MC time traveling (hinestly now that I think of it, similar to the Nightbringer premis) that kinda goes like this:***

This was an opportunity you had never expected to get.

To witness the falling of the brothers. To see them so shattered. So vulnerable. So heartbroken.

But Barbatos had gifted it to you — though with great difficulty due to the finality in the nature of this specific event and its inability to be altered. The deal was he'd come with you, you'd watch from afar and then bith quckly leave. In and out.

You came in, as planned. You witnessed, as planned. And now ...

Barbatos approached a door and opened it, the shimmering teal presence of his magic cloaking its doorway. He looked back at your still and solemn self and gave you a sad smile. "Come now, MC. We can have some tea and talk this all through back at the castle. I can't hold this for much longer."

You nodded silently and stepped up behind him as he began to go through, but then you paused, looking back down the lath you had come from.

The brothers ... you had never witnessed so much pain in them. Their cries. Their screams. It was almost too much to bare.

You remembered the many times they had told you how thankful they were for your presence in the Devildom. About the peace and joy you brought their family.

A very stupid, very dumb plan began to sink itself into your brain.

Barbatos stilled as you tensed and looked up. He gritted his teeth, trying his best to keep the doorway open. "MC, you have to go through the door now."

You paused, looking back at the desperate eyes of your dear friend, then back to the path. You took a deep breath as more and more certainty began to trickle in your brain.

You took a step away from the portal.

"I can't go through."

Barbatos' eyes widened, and he moved as much as he dared partially out of the portal. "MC, you can't stay here. You can't help them in this time -"

"I have to try," you mumbled, taking another step back.

A curse rings from Barbatos as his demon bursts out, and he forces the portal to stay open. "You will die if you stay here. MC, come on!"

You look at him one more time, and Barbatos' expression falls as he sees the look on your face. That stupid mixture of boldness and determination. He already knows it's too late.

You shake your head, moving further back as you walk backward. "Im sorry. I'll find a way back when I can. I have to do something about this!" And without another word, you turn around and start running — the sounds of Barbatos shouting your name and the portal forcing itself shut slowly fading behind you.

Instead, you run. You run and run and run towards the maddened, shattered fragments of the brothers you oh so adore with a new mission locked in your heart.

[hel7l7]

u r giving me bad vibes bro 

[soldier-poet-king]

"Im doing well'' I say, and then immediately splash coffee on the front of my new, white shirt 🤡🤡🤡

[romaritimeharbor]

guys i have no idea when this happened but i have like, multiple new genshin ocs bouncing around in my head

[djservo]

Hi, i just wanted to know (if it wasn’t already answered) but do have a way to read Joaquin and Sergio story in order ? (I'm invested in the drama and i'm using the hastags but it gets complicated)

omg HI yeah the first post is here & I'm pretty sure I have the prev/next links on every post so hopefully it's easy to follow OR you can read chronologically here if that's more your speed :-)