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#but alas i am too good of a friend
caramelapplesauce · 1 year
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okay guys, please do not hate me. this is for my friend, who is uncultured, for valentine’s day. but, wince, does anybody have harmione fanfic recs?? (currently sobbing)
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irrealisms · 1 year
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tagged by @arisingonmorningsinnocent
Rules: shuffle your On Repeat playlist and post the first 10 tracks, then tag 10 people
It's All Futile! It's All Pointless! by Lovejoy
In the Shadow of the Western Hills by the Mountain Goats
Nobody by the Crane Wives
Achilles Come Down by Gang of Youths
Never Quite Free by the Mountain Goats
A Burning Hill by Mitski
Hast Thou Considered the Tetrapod by the Mountain Goats
Be Calm by Fun.
Autoclave by the Mountain Goats
His Theme by Toby Fox
tagging @spiritunwilling @circuit77 @risingape @existentialterror @scientificalstories @erstwhilesparrow @adhdo5 @roundearthsociety @lepertamar @wolffyluna and anyone who sees this and wants to-- feel free to say i tagged you ^_^ and on the flip side if you were tagged and don't want to do it feel free to not!
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blindmagdalena · 4 months
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i got distracted and made homelander a pokemon team. his pikachu is mean as fuck btw.
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hydrachea · 1 year
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This event is delightfully adding to my growing collection of Aether & Paimon being the best duo in all of Teyvat.
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munamania · 7 months
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something that makes me feel guilty is the fact that seeing that persons face rn literally makes me angry. they walked into class and i nearly winced. and in all fairness they were quite kind to me. outside of the several kind of odd red flags. girl whatever. to be quite frank i am a horny bastard and vocal proud etc but few people interest me enough to actually want to hang out with and get to know And i have deep seated intimacy issues so it's like. we really dont have a shot unless the circumstances r exactly right on a full moon perfect thursday of a month etc like. well and tbh i probably would have fucked around with this person but i dont... care... about some big relationship w them.. and i know i could be a relationship girl like eventually i have it in me to have a muse that's what im built for i think idc but not rn... rn i need to hang out with my friends and do my film stuff and have people that maybe wanna make out sometimes is that so much to ask for. for a lesbian at a bar to want to make out perhaps. ** for there to be lesbians at the bars to potentially make out with.
#and i am quite lonely yes thank u for asking. yeah someday id love to get to know someone again in the context of falling in love#what about it. so what now. i dont think im meant for our understanding of romantic love but boy do i crave it#why am i having this moment rn. well ok consider im on my period all i could think about this morning was [redacted] and both parties#of my dyke drama were back in class today. and the one gay person that i think has a crush on me but we dont see each other super often#so im just. guessing based on the way awkward lesbians communicate. idk#and i feel really just mean but i quite literally dont have it in me to pretend to be nice to this person anymore#i wasnt like. some villain for realizing we were acting really coupley and being like oh shit because i didnt want to hurt them#. and trying to communicate and put some distance between us when i thought they were probably in too deep. it's unfortch it took me a sec#but jesus christ yk i cant walk around and feel awkward about it forever. and im frustrated by the fact that we're just acting so odd#but again frankly i think it's largely bc they have an unhealthy relationship with dating. THROWING HORIZONTAL PUNCHES HERE.#OK. STONES FROM A GLASS HOUSE. IM AWARE. REAL RECOGNIZES REAL.#and YET. despite my past insanity. ive been kind. i can understand disappointment and a little awkwardness#but jesus would you rather i pretend to be in love with you for months and then really break your heart.#this is where i get mean and make a joke like well hey if we couldve had weird really mediocre sad angry dyke sex abt it#that would have been cool with me. but alas. we're here instead and it's fucking with my friendships too#and like we were kind of ok friends too. what now. its just u me and this brick wall u built between us bitch#now was EYE not answering texts for a minute. we dont need to get into it.#because the thing IS if i dont play things exactly right. and im not good at that without prior planning. i will accidentally say or do#something that i know. again. from being insane myself. would be just enough for them to hold onto hope#and im not trying to do that to them you know. i was trying to help with the detachment. shitty as it may be. i dont fucking know dude#this post is going to make me look kind of. well. whatever u guys have seen me at my worst. mostly. and post#ok one last thing sorry if this makes me sound like i have a giant ego. like wow heres this person who really liked me and im just shitting#all over them. not what im meaning to do but whatever
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minarcana · 1 year
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i am allowed to be self indulgent I Think. new years.
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technovillain · 1 year
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WATCHED THE MANDO EPISODE. I STILL HAVENT RECOVERED. HE WAS THERE FOR LIKE 20 SECONDS. BUT U HAVE NO IDEA. SO IMPORTATNT TO ME WTFFF
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be-good-to-bugs · 8 months
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the weight of everything bad in my life has decided to crush me on this nice night
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mielgf · 1 year
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do you ever speak to ppl and are just like… how do you navigate the world… with so little self awareness…
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tortademaracuya · 1 year
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I need something harder than blocking i need to fully erase any kind of possibility of even being reminded of certain accounts i need to go on witness protection and forget who i am
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whispering-kavka · 1 year
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i need to be loved like, right now and for forever
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wachi-delectrico · 1 year
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Me, the three weeks I was home alone: Wow I'm eating on a much better schedule with a greater variety of meals and feel physically and mentally great, I haven't binged in forever and I'm able to hold back when I feel the urge to - why don't I do this when my family is around?
My family: *buys too much red meat, which I don't like much* *doesn't buy many vegetables and when they do they run out super quickly* *buys too much frozen and sugary food, which I don't like* *either nobody washes the dishes or they do but they keep stacking clean dishes on the countertop instead of putting them away, making the kitchen look super cluttered and hard to navigate* *they're downstairs all the time working and talking and yelling and doing a lot of noise and moving all over*
Me, starting to skip meals again due to the stress and lack of foods I enjoy: Ah,
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therosejamjournal · 6 months
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men will tell you that you're a very interesting person and talk to you every day, only to start stonewalling you before they admit they're not looking for friends. what's that about.
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1nksta1neddesk · 9 months
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Just yall wait untill i decide ro cave and let fictional people love eachother, this will be the most tooth rotting “if i had to choose her or the Sun, I’d be one nocturnal son of a gun” love you have ever seen. You want a man to look at you like you are the stars in the sky? No this man sees you as the earth and he is simply the moon that gets to orbit and see every part of you.
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fleurmiss · 1 year
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ೃ⁀➷ one love, two mouths
- ,, ao’nung x fem reader
- ,, being bestfriends with aonung ever since you gained consciousness was pleasant, but comes with a side of flirting and realizations you want to be more than just friends, or bestfriends.
- ,, warnings - SUGGESTIVE! adults watch out this is a teenager ur reading abt. minors pls be careful if u dont like making out!! ao’nung is a btch but not to u, tanhì is na’vi for “star, bioluminescent freckle”, simp ao’nung yasss thats like all my characters lol gunna ignore that!!
ps : tanhì is not readers name lol, just a nickname that ao’nung gave her!!!
-‘๑’- sweater weather - the neighborhood
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Ao’nung was mean, you’ve seen how quick he is to bite back and claw at any opportunity that gives him a moment of glory against his rivals, plenty of times.
Ao’nung is mean to everyone, everyone but you, and his family, and maybe Roxto.
Excluding those people, ao’nung has never tried to purposefully hurt your feelings, maybe in a moment of childish banter, he has said mean things that are fleeting, they go away as quickly as they come because he sees the look on your face, and says sorry with a heavy heart.
Some days he is not as apologetic, and delays his apologies until a day or two, you walk away with hurt, anger, and hesitation but he always comes to u, can’t bare being away from you, his girl.
You are sitting on the sand, knees up to your chest as you gaze upon the sea, muscles sore from swimming all day. You almost fall asleep as the peaceful sound of the waves lulls you but alas, your one and only makes his presence known with his loud greeting.
“My tanhì, you look a little lonely!” ao’nung chuckles and sits down beside you, right beside you. No literally, he’s so close that your arm and leg are touching his. Why’s he so close? There’s literally so much space? You’ve stopped questioning it, he’s been touchy with you since forever.
He ruffles the top of your head affectionately, the little smile on his face tells you he’s in a good mood. “hi ao’nung” you say softly and give him a sweet smile, god he almost just melted at the spot, “you seem happy today”
“i am” he replies shortly and you lay your head on his shoulder, letting out a satisfied sigh at finally seeing your favorite person.
his hand finds it’s way to your leg and he gives you a prompt squeeze on your thigh, affection came as naturally as breathing to him when it was with you.
Your eyes roam around the sea as you look at the people smiling with their ilu’s and splashing around in the water, you catch a glimpse of a group of 4 girls as you shudder with the piercing look they give you. You recognize those girls as Tsireya’s friends, remembering her telling you about her dislike for a lot of their decisions. She told you to avoid them, they’re no good.
You furrow your eyebrows in confusion when you see the said girls make their way to you and ao’nung, probably only having matters that deal with ao’nung, you’re pretty sure they’ll ignore your whole existence if anything.
You being this close to The Olo’Eyktan’s only son ignites some sort of resentment in them, automatically making you their competition and viewing you as a threat.
“bruh not these chicks again” ao’nung mutters quietly in irritation and lets out a groan into your hair, hoping they’ll go away if he can’t see them. You giggle but your smile is gone as soon as the girls stop right in-front of your bestfriend. “Ao’nung!! We we’re gonna go take a swim with our ilu’s, I think you should join us! Im sure sitting here watching the ocean isn’t that interesting” the girl’s giggle thinking Ao’nung will get up and follow them without a word.
For a second you believed so too, what you were doing wasn’t that fun, but you didn’t want fun, you wanted calm.
“fuck no” you hear pure distaste in ao’nung’s voice, it makes you cringe, the second hand embarrassment of straight rejection in the face. You smile, he’s really showing no interest in these girls, you almost feel bad, but whats it to you?
“oh- well- you can- you can always come join us later or whatever, whenever y/n lets you go” you’re a bit offended, you aren’t holding ao’nung back from anything, especially these girls, any choice he makes is solely his decision.
“nah im good i prefer y/n anyways”
“whatever” the girls huff and puff and stomp off the space you guys we’re currently sitting at
“bit mean, don’t u think”
“i don’t care” you smile at his quick response
“i think a lot of people dislike our friendship ao’nung, you’re the next Olo’Eyktan and they think i’m competition. They can’t let me ruin their chances of becoming Tsahik.”
“tanhì, what are you even saying?”
“i just.. what i mean is.. you’re almost ready to find a mate, and you must choose wisely, as your choice will be the next Tsahik for our clan, she must work with you as one, and i feel like i’m holding you back from finding a good mate”
Ao’nung pays attention to you, listening to your worries with furrowed brows, he’s so good to you, always. It makes your heart squeeze when you think of him being this affectionate with any other girl, you’re selfish, you want him to yourself.
As much as this hurts, you will be open with him, but you will not open your heart to him as of now. You sigh, he grabs your hand and his thumb rubs soothing circles, telling you to continue.
“i think.. i think re’yal is a beautiful girl, her parents are talented and she takes after them-“ you are cut off.
“i couldn’t care less for re’yal” you tilt your head in confusion
“na’yi is a good healer”
“she is a good healer.”
Ah. It’s Na’yi that he’s chosen then. You look up at him, unable to stop your head from moving. He smiles. Ouch.
“i have the stupidest girl sitting in front of me right now” you hit him gently in the chest, he catches your hand and intertwines his fingers with yours.
Woah. You’ve held hands multiple times but not this way. It feels different. You’re almost about to throw up.
Your eyes quickly drop down to his lips, god, you pray to Ewya that he doesn’t notice.
He does notice, and he thinks you’re so cute he could make-out with you right now.
“she’s so stupid but she’s also the prettiest, she’s really cute too, i think she’d make a great tsahik” you’re embarrassed now, what does this mean? why’s he such a jerk?
“i don’t think Na’yi wo-“
“tanhì, i don’t care about Na’yi, i do not want her.”
“Ao’nung.. allow me to help you, you cannot delay this anymore”
“y/n you just don’t get the hint do you?”
“what?”
Ao’nung groans frustrated, he looks around to see if anyone is watching, what he’s about to do right now might cause issues, he can’t find himself to care any longer though.
Ao’nung cranes his head enough so his lips are an inch away from yours, he looks at you with lidded eyes and you’re already looking at him
“let me kiss you” he asks and you don’t wait, you nod and he smashes his soft lips against yours, desperately. You’ve been wanting to do this, been wanting to kiss your bestfriend.
He grabs the back of your neck to deepen the kiss, damn, he’s a good kisser. Not that you’ve kissed anyone else before, but he���s making you feel really good.
It’s fast, and you both are desperate, impatient, and incredibly in love. He grabs your waist to pull you closer and you whine into the kiss. Sweet. He’s never loved a sound more. His confession comes between kisses.
“y/n, i want you,” kiss. “and only you.” kiss.
you pull away and you’re breathing heavily, you look at ao’nung, pretty sure your eyes have hearts in them. “i-“ you don’t know what to say.
“I see you” you whisper, only meant for him to hear, with sincere eyes.
Ao’nung looks at you and his lips twitch into a small smile.
He goes into kiss you again and your hands find their way behind his neck, he pulls back and trails a few kisses from your jaw to your neck, you gasp softly when he finds your sensitive spot and sucks on it, sinking his teeth into your soft skin, you’re so sure this is gonna leave a bruise.
He kisses you again but this time openmouthed, his tongue swiping against your bottom lip to ask for permission, you open your mouth more to let him in. “i love you so much” he whimpers into your mouth and you realize you wanna get out of here. Your feel yourself getting embarrassed as you realize the 4 girls probably saw your full on makeout session.
“what’s wrong baby?”
“lets get out of here ao’nung” you plead, doe eyes looking up at your lover. God, you make him crazy.
He takes your hand and leads you to his marui pod, you guys pass the 4 girls on your way there and by the look they’re giving you, you know they saw it, maybe even enjoyed it a bit. (jk) The girl’s eyes travel down to your neck where your fresh hickey lies and they immediately turn their backs around, unable to watch your love bloom any longer.
You laugh loudly and that causes ao’nung to turn around, your hands still intertwined as you giggle, ao’nung gets the hint on what you’re laughing at and smirks as he watches you, amused.
“bit mean, don’t you think?” he mocks you and you slap his arm, he throws that arm over your shoulder as you guys walk , the sound of your laugh rings in ao’nungs ears and he swears he’ll never love someone like he loves you.
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karomiiz · 2 years
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why is it so hard talking to humans 🙃
#sometimes i do wish i didn't have like any best friends and only had shallow relationships#i'm not good at these types of things#people tire me out and request too much emotional attention that i can't really give me#and then there's the constant trying not to be rude and overstep boundaries and whatnot bc the more you know about a perosn#*person/the easier it is to upset them bc you know what makes them tick#you have to figure out ways to not upset people all. the. time. i hate it it's exhausting my introvert shell is coming back in#because people really are just so tiring right now#probably bc i am back home but gosh#are all people this exhausting?!#like as soon as you get super close to them why does it feel like such a chore to be around them#literally every person i am close to irl it's just so tiring like having to keep up with them talk to them and whatnot#shallow friends are easier bc i don't have to talk to people all the time#i don't have to take care of them or give them emotional attention#they take care of their own life i do the same#this is why i so firmly believe that romantic love is a waste afdasdfasdf#i do not think it's real alas bc all relationships whether familial platonic and romantic are hard work#and i work enough as it is i don't want to work more in a relationship that i have yet to find is worth putting up with all this work#i put up with family bc i still live under the roof but the minute i don't have to there dead in all aspects but physical to me#i put up with best friends bc we have baggage and shit that we haul together so i am essentially trapped#like jesus this is all so much work#are all relationships supposed to be this draining 24/7?#like why do people even have friends or relationships if that's the case humans sure do like pursuing these that have very little realistic#gain bc i mean honestly i see people as data and that's my worse habit i know but like#if you can't be pragmatically something worth keeping than i don't see that point of you being there#which is how i view my family as well i mean if i were to run an analysis and find that most of the things are negative than positive#than in my eyes i will associate with you but won't have any#thoughts about you like you've just diminished#anyway time to go soak in a bath and reset my brain
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