#but for now he'll stay on my rant blog

[minqies]

everybody say hi to my ateez add that will never come alive 😭😭

[star-stilinski]

stiles with virgin reader? maybe she's like insecure or like is just scared he'll look at her differently 😩😩 everytime i watch the eichen house basement scene i literally die because he is so sweet and gentle and GHRHHSHEHDH

okay so i actually have that written from before i deleted my blog... would you guys want me to write another?! i'll repost the one i have but this concept is really super fun to me and i like writing it a lot so... maybe you guys would want to see more?? anyway here's the old one!

☆

yep, stiles is perfect. dominant, but just to guide you. observant and overly educated (he once spent an all nighter researching female pleasure and orgasms. he stayed a virgin for a long time after, but at least he knew!). he wants you to feel good.

i feel like he had a conversation with allison once when she was really frustrated with scott where she basically ranted about how he was great in bed, really, but he sometimes got too excited and forgot about her until later. or his wearwolfness made him a bit rough. stiles just kinda stood there, but he was determined to keep that from being his reviews when he finally got laid. it was very educational.

set right before season 4.

you're reading up on the spanish mafia on your bed while stiles types away on his computer with one hand and breaks to texts scott with the other. he seems to be especially stimulated today.

"i think my excuse will be that we're camping." he mumbles randomly, setting his phone down face-up to take a swig from your water bottle. you frown. he smiles. "when we go get derek."

"for your dad?" you set the library book on the floor and scoot up on your bed, sitting back against the pillows.

"yeah. he's all worried i'm isolating myself after... everything. so he'll like that anyway. hey, scott invited us to the lake later tonight, wanna go?" your boyfriend talks so quick you almost get dizzy. that subject change was so stiles though, and seeing him as himself after those worrying days of the possessed, zombie-eyed shell of a man he was makes your chest feel fuzzy.

but at the mention of swimming, you glance away from him. you hadn’t been feeling super awesome about your body lately. It’s just… stiles is amazing, really, but he never says much about your looks and you’re scared he’s not into that part of you. It’s not like you need to be constantly hit on, but knowing that he wanted you in every way would be… well, it would make you feel better than you do.

so you hesitate, at the thought of being in a swimsuit in front of everyone. “uh, i dunno, i have a lot of homework.”

he laughs and his eyebrows shoot up. "what? we got ahead on, like, everything. did you fall behind again?”

"okay, first off, we did not get ahead on everything. we did everything due this week. you’re just used to waiting until the night before to rush through. second of all, i’m not really feeling the lake right now.”

“why not?” he frowns, tilting his head at you. you roll your neck and sigh, wishing you hadn’t said anything. It was so annoying to try and explain it.

“i mean…” you shift uncomfortably on your bed. “i don’t know. i’m just feeling weird lately.”

stiles stands, grabbing a stray pen to fiddle with as he stretches his legs, pacing your bedroom floor. "yeah, that's what you say, don't you? that you’re feeling ‘weird’.”

"you're weird." you deflect, watching him pace. he likes it when you do that, you both realized one day a long time ago when his hair was buzzed and you had braces. a lot has changed since then, but he still liked to know that you’re listening when he has to move around.

"and yet here you sit, after inviting me over to listen to me ramble." he teases back, throwing you a look before turning to walk the other side of the floor. he scans the pictures and posters on your wall, back turned to you. "seems like my weird is good weird and yours is bad weird."

you're thankful he isn't watching as you flush a light pink color in the cheeks. it's the stupidest stuff getting you flustered recently. the other day he said 'atta girl' to you and you were still blushing ten minutes later. kira actually thought you were sick. 

you know why. Part of you just wants to ask him, but a larger part of you assumes that -even as his girlfriend- he’ll be grossed out if you asked to have sex. He’s just not into you like that.

stiles swivels around to look at you, frowning curiously. "you went quiet."

"oh, um," you shift on the bed and fiddle with the hem of your shirt. he watches you do so with a look on his face before stepping closer to the edge of the bed while you scramble to remember what you were talking about. "your weird is tolerable weird."

he smirks and scoffs but it's kind of a laugh, one that makes your stomach swoop pleasantly. "what makes yours bad weird?"

"it’s nothing, sti’.” you fiddle with one of your stuffed animals, growing antsy under his gaze. “just thoughts.”

you feel the bed dip beside you as stiles sits, feeling his shoulder brush with yours. there's plenty of room on the bed. you know he did it on purpose.

"i like to know your thoughts.”

"yeah, well, sometimes i prefer to keep them in my head." you huff, still not looking at him. “and anyway, they’re just-”

"weird?" he interrupts and you look up at him. he's smirking, brows up, eyes sparkly.

you frown at his cockiness. you were going to say weird, but still. you can hear him silently asking you to elaborate.

"you’re not allowed to get all pitying, okay?" you feel yourself about to spill anyway, so you might as well tell him. it would usually take a lot more encouragement for you to say anything, but it's stiles and he's using his stupid pretty eyes on you and you trust him with your life. “lately i just feel kinda… just like, um, not great, i guess? i’m just scared i’m not doing enough for you, or something’s wrong with me because you never say anything about my looks and i dont need you to, but if you’re unsatisfied i want to change that because i want you to be happy in every area to do with me.”

stiles is silent for a moment. you look up and catch him look away from you. he frowns and looks back, meeting your gaze head on.

"that's not weird.” he says, quietly, brows upturned. “you… wow, you’re dense.”

you laugh abruptly at the jab stiles pulled, embarrassed. "stiles! I’m not upset or anything, i just dont want you to not be into the way i look. which might be unrealistic, i guess. not everyone is going to be physically attracted to me. that's fine."

"you say that a lot." his tone drops to something more thoughtful. you give him a face and tilt your head.

"what? no i don't."

"yeah, you do. 'oh, well, lydia's the beauty out of all of us anyway.' 'malia, you should dance with kira to blend in. that would be casual and guys will find you two hot, anyway.' 'that isn't my color.' 'i'm breaking out.' 'i'm bloated.' 'i don't think anyone would want to see me in something that revealing.'"

you feel heat crawl up your neck as he quotes stuff you've said the past few weeks. you scramble to make him wrong. "stiles, literally all of those were different sentences."

"no, they were not." he shifts, like he's revving up to explain something. you press yourself against the pillows to create space between you two. he notices. "you keep saying you think you're ugly. just the other day, a girl you didn't even know came up to you and said you were pretty and when she walked away you said she was lying. i remember, you were convinced. thought it was just to be nice because you had let her cut you in line for drinks. it was at the movies."

you look away from him, narrowing your eyes. you're embarrassed right now, and he knows. why isn't he stopping? "she was lying, stiles. you're a guy, you can't see that stuff like girls do."

"i'm a guy, i'm not blind." he gets hotter in his voice. both in tone and in attractiveness, getting sterner. saying 'i'm right' without saying it. "are you blind? you're so pretty. like, objectively."

"stiles, can you drop this? I shouldn’t have said anything." you curl in on yourself, drawing your knees up to hide your body. you feel so exposed, like he tugged the part of you out that you don't really like to talk about.

stiles goes soft. like a flip being switched, he loses his fight and shifts to face you better, placing a hand on your knee. "hey, i'm sorry."

you desperately want to go back to when he was a safe distance away and pacing your room and teasing you. you hate it when you ruin the mood with your feelings. you hate how much you love it when he touches you, especially since he'd never want you the way that you want him.

"it's fine, i promise." you claw around your brain for something to change the subject, but you feel it short circuit as stiles' hand begins to hold your cheek. he lifts your chin to look at him. you feel your cheeks flame hot and your whole body warm at his touch. you stare at him as you feel your resolve practically melt away.

"do you think you're pretty?" he asks, curiously. like you're something he doesn't fully understand yet, but he's on his way and he's getting excited to speed up the process. it makes you nervous.

"umm... i don't know..." you don't think so. you're very confident that you're ugly. but telling stiles that is letting him win. and you don't know what you'll do with a cocky stiles when he's already ballsy enough to corner you like he is now.

"i do." he says with finality. stiles gets closer and his hand leaves your cheek, only to part your legs gently and crawl in between them. "i think you’re hot. and pretty. and when you focus you nibble your lip and it kinda makes me want to pin you to the nearest flat surface and eat you out.”

now your legs are on either side of stiles and he's leaning over you, eyes roaming over your face hungrily. you stutter dumbly for a moment, face flushed and feeling like a cornered bunny getting stared down by a wolf. his scent becomes stronger and you resist the urge to ask him to do just that, opting instead for feeling like a gross creep and fretting if you’ve shaved well enough.

"you don’t have to say that..." you trail off, still flustered at stiles' boldness. "i just didn't really know what you thought about my looks, i guess. b-but i guess that’s kinda conceited, huh?" you laugh weakly at your joke. stiles doesn't laugh at all. instead, he watches you quietly for a moment, a hand landing on your knee again.

"i don’t say anything because i never want you to feel uncomfortable." he states breathily. you squirm under him as he leans forward, a determined look in his eyes. “do you want me to tell you what i think about you?”

"stiles, c'mon." you turn your head away. maybe you can resist this question by acting pathetic. it's not really working, and stiles just gently guides your chin so that you're looking at him again. he knows the answer. he kinda has to, doesn't he? otherwise he wouldn't be doing this.

"I want to hear you say it." he looks into your eyes like it would actually literally kill him if you said no. you feel that rush you get when he talks like this, all quiet and deep like he's breathless. and despite you thinking that stiles thought of you as a low-physicality girlfriend, you find yourself nodding slightly.

"yes, i do."

stiles sighs out like you just healed every one of his wounds and leans forward, shifting himself so that he's propped on his hands and knees above you. one hand moves to your waist and the other holds his weight as he leans down.

the kiss sends a spark down your spine. as he goes back in again, kissing you harder, deeper, gently guiding your mouth open, you think it's better than any other kiss you've experienced. his hand inches your shirt up to reveal your stomach and he pulls back.

"you're beautiful. okay? i feel like you're not hearing me. i want you to see it." he says, still upset about that. you're still a bit flustered by the quick change of events, so you don’t respond.

he frowns at your lack of response but it softens as your hands slide onto his neck, pulling him down again. he smiles and goes back in for another kiss.

this one's even more than the last. stiles' tongue... well, it works. that's all you can describe as he makes you gasp in surprised pleasure from just a kiss. you can feel his slightly cocky smirk as he kisses again, but it gets lost when you rake your nails lightly against the back of his neck. he manuvers you both further down the bed so you're laying more comfotably and kisses you deeply again, like he can't get enough. 

he presses his knee up against your core as you kiss and it sends a pulse of pleasure up your body, making you pinch your brows. stiles pulls back abruptly, and you're both panting. you can see your spit making his lips glisten prettily and you want to hide under the covers and pull him back into you at the same time.

"hey," stiles dawns a little smile. it's sweet, and when he tugs at the hem of your shirt gently your heart flutters. "can i take this off?"

you pause at that. if he takes your shirt off, he'll have to see you shirtless. you didn't wear a nice bra today, just the grey t-shirt bra you got at walmart. but he wants to see you shirtless. and you want to see him shirtless.

then again, you’re no pornstar-level body. maybe stiles will be disappointed. or laugh. no, no, he won’t laugh. but if he doesn’t like it, he won’t say anything, and you’ll be stuck wondering what he’s thinking again...

"i can hear you overthinking, you know." stiles' big palm lands on your bare waist, his thumb rubbing your skin softly. "we can stop if you want."

you meet his eyes. he looks like he really means it, like he'll pretend none of this happened if you asked. his hand leaves your waist, cups your cheek, and his thumb presses against your bottom lip softly. you breathe in. "i don't want to stop."

he nods, smiling. it's crooked and you almost giggle because of course stiles is excited to keep making out. and then his gaze shifts and he takes his hand off your cheek to tug on your shirt again. his brows lift in question.

"uhm, yeah." you nibble your lip. fuck it. "take it off."

"that was not enthusiastic enough."

"i-?! don't blame me if you don't like what you see! i just don't want you to be unimpressed!" you squeak defensively. he laughs and pulls you up just enough to lift your shirt off.

"you can be so obtuse sometimes." he mumbles as he tosses your shirt out of the way. you're propped up on your forearms when he turns back around and you can practically hear the breaks in his brain screech to a halt.

his eyes roam your body in a way that makes you flush and his hands aren't much better, spreading over your now-exposed middle like they have a mind of their own. he lets out a breath and blinks a few times, one hand sliding up to cup your bra. “s’ this okay?”

you swallow and nod. it is. really. you like the way stiles’ hands feel on you and how his eyes track over you like he wants to devour you but doesn’t want to hurt you. you like how eager he is to touch you. it makes you feel like maybe he really wants to.

he leans over you and presses a kiss to your neck. you tilt your head back on instinct as he grows more persistent, pressing open mouthed kisses along your jaw and nibbling your neck to pull a sound out of you. you gasp when he nibbles your earlobe and he reacts positively, hands getting more confident as he cups your breasts or you waist or whatever he can get ahold of.

you feel him press his knee up against you again and it makes you jolt momentarily. your thoughts are getting hazier, you feel yourself relaxing every second you spend underneath him. his hand travels up your back and finds your bra clasp and he kisses down your collarbone as he undoes it.

“you’re so pretty.” he starts, pulling back. you blink up at him as he sits over you. “you are, I don’t care what you think. I can’t believe you’re so convinced otherwise.”

he pauses, giving you time to reject him or tell him to stop or do anything. instead, you tug at his shirt, pulling it up.

he takes it off immediately and you press your hands against his bare skin. “stiles, i’ve never done anything before. I’m not gonna be good.”

he scoffs and shakes his head, toying with your loose bra strap. it’s still on, unclasped. he’s waiting.

“you’re doing so good right now, idiot.” he hums affectionately as he traces the seam of your bra, fingers brushing your breast. you suck in a breath. he watches your chest rise. “i’ve, um, thought about this before. a lot. and it’s ten times better having you under me than daydreaming about it.”

you blush at that. he traces the underside of your breast, fingers slipping under your bra to feel your skin. “I want to make you feel good.” he whispers, meeting your eyes. you nod slowly, fingers running along his abdomen as you admire him.

“you do?” you ask, as if he wasn’t practically pinning you to the bed already. he nods eagerly and it spurs you on. you shift, slowly pulling your bra off. he helps you and tosses it away with your shirt, but his eyes never leave you. instead, they dart all over your chest, hands cupping your tits. he sighs and his thumbs swipe over your pebbling nipples, making you squeak in shock.

“you’re so beautiful. ‘m gonna make you believe it, okay?” he says with finality, maneuvering so that he can kiss your breasts. you gasp when his tongue flicks over your nipple and he pulls up just to envelop your mouth. “you sound so pretty. just relax, I’ll take care of you.”

you’re embarrassed at how easy it is for you to make noise and how eager you are to listen to his instructions. you sink into the pillows and let your eyes flutter shut as stiles kisses you. it's soft and slow, but it makes you a puddle anyway.

stiles gets the both of you down to your underwear shortly after. his hands are incessantly gentle and when he does something new he leaves a sort of gap for you to tell him to stop.

you never do.

he's mouthing at your neck when he first presses his long fingers against your clothed clit, and you sigh lightly in relief. the pressure was more than enough and you had completely soaked through your panties anyway. he pulls away from your neck to watch you as he rubs a slow circle against your nerves, humming in approval when your lips part and your brows pinch.

"does that feel good?" he questions quietly, still rolling a circle against you with his middle finger. you nod and hear him swallow as his eyes roam from your exposed tits to your wet spot and everywhere in between, locking eyes with you at the end.

"i can't wait to hear you. you're gonna sound so good." he mumbles, mostly to himself as he slowly pulls your panties off. you whine in embarrassment and cover your face with your hand.

"don't say stuff like that!" you huff, scrubbing your face like it will make the blushing subside. "you're getting your hopes up."

"jesus christ." he groans, and it sounds super fucking hot. you peek through your fingers and see him looking at you like you've wounded him. "you've exceeded every single one of my very high hopes i've been getting off to since freshman year so far. you-i mean, look at what you're doing to me."

he gently takes the hand you're using to cover your face and guides it against his bulge. he's hard as a rock, and when you press your hand against him he tilts his head back and sighs out. "seriously, you're so gorgeous. and you're a great kisser. you're doing so good. i mean..."

with your panties off and him in between your legs, he has easy access as he slides two fingers through your slick. you can both hear it in the quiet of the room and you feel that heat rush of embarrassment again, eyes widening as he literally moans. "you're so wet. just for me."

and as he presses his finger to your clit, it feels ten times better than it did with your panties on. you gasp and your eyes flutter closed as you whimper "god," completely on accident. his hands aren't amazingly skillful, but the way he watches your reactions and tweaks his performance, fucking a finger into you and keeping his pace on your bundle of nerves-it's almost hotter than a guy who isn't looking to improve, because stiles is adjusting things to your preference. not just what every woman would generally like.

"how's it feel, pretty girl?" he hums against your stomach, kissing down your body. you don't know what the hell he's doing but most of your mental focus is on how stiles is making you feel, anyway.

"feels good, sti'," you gasp, feeling his mouth against your thigh. he moans when you say his name before sucking a hickey onto your inner thigh. your eyes snap open and you prop yourself up to look at him, eyes wide. "are you leaving a mark?"

stiles looks up at you, and then at your neck, and then your tits. he pulls away from your skin slowly and mumbles "uhm..."

"whatever, just... don't make it ugly. hickeys can look so weird." you flop back against the pillows and sigh, but your thoughts are cut short as stiles-

"oh, fuck," you moan, rolling your hips against stiles' tongue unconsciously as he presses his mouth on your clit. he flicks his tongue and you gasp out another moan, hips lifting.

his big hands land on your bare hips and press them back down, holding them there as he looks up at you. meanwhile, his tongue is laying claim on you in a way no one ever has, and he's making you feel better than you ever have. you sit up on your forearms to watch him and he sucks on your clit, making your eyes roll back. "stiles, oh god, that feels really good-"

he moans at your noises, mouth moving with more fervor against you, hands pulling you closer to him. he's doing everything perfectly, or so you thought, until he pulls a hand away from your hip and presses two fingers inside of you. it's a stretch, but it feels amazing, and your brain is fried as you feel yourself hurtling towards that edge-

and then he pulls back.

you look down at the speed of light, glaring at him on accident. "wha-? why-?"

his eyes are dark, something you haven't seen in them before. his mouth is covered in your arousal and he's sitting up, leaning over you. "i really want you to finish with me inside you. does... is that...?"

your previous annoyance falls away and you bob your head enthusiastically. "yeah. yes. please."

he grins and licks some of your slick off of his lips before kissing you sweetly. when he pulls back, you look down to take his boxers off but realize he took them off already. you also realize you've never seen stiles' dick before.

"your staring is making me nervous." he teases, rubbing your thigh. you blink and look back up at him, smiling sheepishly. he smiles back, and it's crooked, and he's tilting his head and panting and sometimes his eyes are wandering to your tits before snapping back up to your eyes. and.

"you're the hottest guy in the whole world, i think." you hum, reaching up to cup his cheek. his eyes go wide and he laughs, kissing your palm.

"is my dick that big?"

"not what i meant."

"it could be."

you laugh, biting the inside of your cheek. "'s it gonna hurt?"

his eyes go soft, a bit worried. "proabably for a second, but we'll go at your pace so you can stretch out properly, and if it's too much i can just finish the way i started, kay?"

you nod. stiles would never, ever hurt you. and with the way he's looking at you and how he moans when you feel good and how his hands always have to find a way to pleasure you... something in you switches and you realize he really wants you to like this. that he's being honest when he says he's thought about it a lot.

so as he quickly rolls on a condom (which included him admitting that he usually grabs one before he leaves to see you) and presses into you -slowly, slowly- you try your best to relax against the pillows. it's not unbearable, but you have to ask him to pause sometimes. he always does, and layers praises on top of each other while he does it.

"you're doing so well. just breathe, okay? just like that. holy shit, you feel amazing- b-but how do you feel? you alright?" he rambles halfway inside. you nod, breathing deeply.

"it actually feels... good..." you close your eyes and pull on his waist, urging him forward slowly. he bottoms our and gasps out a moan at the same time you do, feeling him reach the spot you're never able to. his hand snakes in between the two of you and presses against your clit. you gasp out his name, tilting your head back. it's almost too much.

almost.

as you urge him to move, he presses slow circles against your bundle of nerves and kisses any patch of your bare skin he can get ahold of.

"just relax, baby- fuck, god, you know how may times i've thought about this?" he pulls out slowly and pushes back in, and all of his stimulating mixed with his moans and his words... he's doing a good fucking job, that's for sure.

you moan when he moves a little quicker, gasping. he presses his tongue into your open mouth and kisses you sloppily, going a bit faster with every thrust. you whine when he flicks your clit almost crudely, pressing your head back against the mattress and gasping, "faster, sti'"

he obeys without further encouragement, snapping his hips a little quicker than comfortable. you feel your body adjust and watch stiles as he leans back to admire you.

his eyes rake over you, one hand cupping your breast and kneading it softly. he lets out a higher pitched moan than you've heard from him when he sees the point where your bodies connect, slowing his thrusts just to watch. "you're perfect, i swear to god."

you can't respond, not when he's already leaning down to overstimulate your nipples. your brain feels like it's in the other room and has been replaced with stiles' hands, almost solely focused on his kneading of your tits and his circling of your clit. his mouth makes its way back up your neck and he kisses you again, still with very little concern for the proprieties of it.

it's sudden, the feeling that crawls up on you as his hips snap quicker and praise falls from his mouth in between kisses. you gasp for air and tug his head back by pulling his hair, causing a loud moan from him that you'll have to unpack later. you're arching your back, whimpering "faster, faster," squeezing your eyes shut as you feel that sweet release low in your belly. he speeds up his hips, but more importantly his fingers on your clit. your vision goes white for a split second as you cry out, chanting his name like a prayer. you hear him moaning too, and it only helps you as he rides you through your orgasm.

"holy shit," you gasp as you come down. he nods, pulling out of you carefully, and you both lock eyes. you're smiling and he's kissing you and everything feels kind of perfect for a split second. then you remember him, and feel like an idiot. "oh, did you, i totally forgot, did you-"

"don't worry," he laughs sheepishly and glances away from you. "i did. it was, um, when you pulled me away from kissing you."

"when i pulled your hair?" you ask incredulously. he buries his face into your neck and groans.

"maybe we should focus on you again." he kisses up your neck and all over your face. "you did so good, you're so perfect and pretty and oh my god you thought i wasn't attracted to you. you're so out of it sometimes."

"stop insulting me! you never said anything!" you defend, slapping his shoulder. he laughs and cups your face.

"i'm going to say every thought i have now. okay?"

"i feel like this isn't going to end well..."

he grins mischievously. "you look so good when you're cumming. let me make you make that face again?"

you close your eyes and sigh. "yeah, i knew it. this is going to be the death of me."

he laughs, loudly, excitedly, and kisses you. "it's funny how you think death will help. i bet you'd be a sexy ghost. oh, fuck, now i'm thinking about that. yep, it's hot."

you shout and push him off of you, laughing.

☆

when i wrote this originally, i wasn't super happy with it. even now i'm like... ehhh.... i dunno.... so if you guys want more of stiles with virgin/inexperienced reader, i have a lot of ideas and would totally post some if given the 'okay' from my fellow stiles lovers! let me know!!

(please say you want more because i want to make more lowkey tho just lowkey like idec but please)

[safetycar-restart]

KINKTOBER DAY 22: COCKWARMING [LOGAN SARGEANT X READER]

NOTE: This is an NSFW fic with sub!Logan and dom!reader. If you are under 18 or uninterested, scroll past. Alternatively, if you like what you see here then consider checking out my blog :))

This work forms part of a kinktober series where I discuss a different kinky concept with a different motorsports athlete every day. We also discuss the concepts in more detail on my blog so if you have any thoughts, feel free to stop by!

(Since it's COTA, I figured we should have some Logan thoughts)

It's no secret that Logan has had a tough season, and that he's being very very hard on himself about it. And honestly I think the best thing anyone could do for him is just give him a safe space?

Logan feels so much pressure to perform, to be good for Williams, to represent his country, to prove himself, to perform for his family and himself and it just... it gets too much for him sometimes. When the race goes badly, or even just mediocrely. He gets so stuck in his own head and he doesn't need someone to try and distract him, he needs someone to just give him a safe space where he doesn't have to perform like that.

And cockwarming is perfect for that?

He starts to ask for it actually, starts to come to you after races and fall into your arms, mumbling against your ear and asking if you two can spend the night in the hotel and not go out. You say yes of course, knowing that Logan needs quiet time.

He holds your hand the whole trip to the hotel, trying to keep it together in front of the team but you can see how he's struggling. It's all reaching the point where he's put too much pressure on himself for too long and now something has to give.

When you get to the hotel, he says he's going to have a bath by himself, clearing trying to tell you he needs a moment and so you agree of course, telling him you'll order room service in the mean time.

You're alone in the hotel room for all of ten minutes before you hear crying from the bathroom, and two minutes later he's calling for you. You have to wait until he calls, because you know how much trust it takes for Logan to let someone see him like this. If you go before he asks, he'll feel violated and uncertain if he can leave the door unlocked anymore. You would never ever do that to him.

So you wait until he calls, and then go.

You find him sitting in the bath, crying with his knees brought up to his chest. When he spots you, he just mumbles, " 'm sorry, it's just... I dont know it's all so much."

Your heart breaks for him, and rather than say anything you just hold your hand out for him to take. There's nothing you can say, but you can look after him.

You dry him off, ignoring that tears are still running down his cheeks and then take him to the bedroom. He hides under the blankets with you, resting against your chest and talking about his day. He tells you how sad and disappointed he is, how much he wishes he could do better, how much of a disappointment he is.

You let him talk, kissing his head and rubbing his back at the same time to give him some extra comfort. He talks himself hoarse, letting himself complain and rant and have a little pity party because he needs to be allowed to feel those things.

When he stops talking, he stays cuddled against your chest. After a little while, he looks up at you and gives you a small smile, thanking you for listening and saying he loves you. You give him a little kiss, promising him that you love him too and that you're always willing to listen to him.

It's then that he moves up and requests some more kisses, turning into a slow makeout session. You know where this is going, and you're more than happy with that.

"Can we?" logan asks, a little smile on his face.

"Of course we can," you tell him, always happy to be close to him.

So you stroke him to hardness, kissing away his little whines and shaky breathes until he's ready for more.

It's so slow as he enters you, inch by inch until eventually he's as far as he can go and then he just collapses against you. You hold him close, trading soft kisses and just enjoying being close.

You two will stay like that until Logan gets soft enough to slip out, and then you'll warm up the room service you ordered and talk about anything except racing.

But for now, Logan is happy and safe in your arms, finally able to let everything go and just enjoy being close to you.

[cbsxreader]

OMG WAIT NO ONE EVER WRITES FOR CBS IM GONNA CRY THANK YOU

if its alr with you can you do cbs x a reader who is like shy around other ppl but not him (if that makes sense) IF NOT THATS OK I LOVE YOUR WORK AAAHH!!!

Glad you love my work 🫶!! And yea, I started this blog bcs x reader stuff with him is dying and I'm not letting it die

CBS x Reader who is shy around others except him

You feel like you can tell and talk to Christian about everything and anything at any time. He gets used to to you fairly quickly and you both can rant or playfully argue about something for hours.

Christian is honestly surprised when you are around other people and don't talk much. He's so used to hearing your voice all the while he's around you so it feels weird.

He teases you sometimes for being so quiet around others. When everyone else's backs are turned, he'll lean in to whisper to you: "Where's your loud mouth now, smart arse?"

Though Christian teases you about it, you can go ahead and stay close to him in public. He'll either have an arm around you or a hand on your thigh to show he's there for you.

He likes to post-pone going to public places just so he can talk to you freely and hear your voice. You being shy is cute to him, but he still prefers to just talk with you about anything rather than you staying as quiet as a mouse.

You best bet he's not letting anyone make fun of you. Teasing you is his job. No matter who it is, he's ready to murder them with a nod from you.

If Christian is taken aback by one of your insults or whatever you've said, he'll remember it for the rest of the week. He'll be randomly zoning out and he'll suddenly remember something unhinged you've said to him.

Christian sometimes lets you whisper what you want to say and he'll say it for you because he's definitely not shy.

"Huh? You guys again?" The tired cashier looks at the both of you, Christian has his arms crossed and you swear you could be anywhere but there.

"Listen here, dickhead, they asked for no pickles, so what gives?" Christian gives a glare, pointing to you, meanwhile you can appreciate him helping you out with social interaction.

Though he helps you sometimes, he doesn't do it all the time so you are pushed to talk for yourself. He sometimes acts more snappy and unhinged just to make you sound and feel normal if you talk.

If someone pisses you off and you find your shyness slipping, he'll notice and he's all for you being honest, so he "tempts" you to snap.

"I'm here to back you, you know."

"If anything happens, I'm ready to throw fists."

"Show 'em what you've made of, love, even I can't stand this."

When you do decide to get in someone's face, Christian is there to back you and he's proud to help you, he's all for you opening up and being honest. No matter what, he's ready to defend you and point the same fingers as you.

[mcnotok]

okay so i live in a place where it's cold very like 80% of the year, including now and because it was really freakin cold today, it got me thinking about how the climates of undertale really work and that in turn got me thinking about how the bad sans gang™ would react to the cold.

so like first off, do monsters even react to the temperature changing. i mean undyne overheats in her armour when you enter hotland so presumably she does react to changes in her surrounding temperatures. but undyne isn't made entirely out of magic and bones and she likely is a little bit more human than other monsters since a really popular theory about her eye is that she got injected with determination.

but sans and papyrus are skeletons and live in snowdin and that place is constantly covered in snow. (side note: HOW THE FUCK IS THERE SNOW UNDER THE MOUNTAIN. like it could be magic but that's just weird especially considering the fact that waterfall which is right next to snowdin is a marshy grassland which if you know anything about that type of environment you know that snow doesn't really work, okay rant over back to the skeletons).

i've seen a few pieces of art and fanfiction that basically make it so the skeletons react to the cold like a human would; frostbite, hypothermia, ect... but thought is always like would they react that way. most versions of sans are wearing hoodies and shorts and slippers out in the cold and they seem just fine.

cross is wearing like sixty different layers but it's made pretty clear that his outfit is supposed to be a really embellished royal guard uniform so jury's out on him actually being hot underneath all the fluff.

my conclusion is that skeleton monsters are pretty resilient to the cold in general and that it takes a lot to get any of them uncomfortable when it comes to the weather.

so onto the headcanons.

i think that horror, killer, and dust would react to the cold in a similar way because they all lived in snowdin for most of their lives prior to getting hired/adopted into nightmares gang. i think all three of them would really enjoy the snow and the cold in general

horror would be a little more adverse to it because of the hole in his skull and getting water out of there seems kinda annoying to deal with. killer starts a snowball fight and immediately gets his ass handed to him by everyone else. dust just would sorta starfish into the snow and stay there for the whole day. he's like those huskies who just stay outside for as long as possible and when someone drags him back inside he's just laying on his back, covered in snow.

cross is interesting because he also technically grew up in snowdin but most of the universes that x-gaster put him into were on the surface and along with his fluffy coat and scarf i think he's less hyped about the cold. like with all the layers he'll be fine but if you take that from him and he's just outside with a turtleneck and shorts, he'll be shivering after like 15 minutes.

nightmare hates the cold. i've seen a few headcanons that involve his slime/sludge freezing and i think that's really fucking cool. nightmare would rather eat like (idk what nightmare doesn't like to eat but assume something icky) than go outside. if it's under like 35 degrees he's just going to stay inside. he also fucking hates the snow with a burning passion because if it melts on him it'll hurt (i'm actually not sure if the whole, nightmare is hurt by water thing is canon to dreamtale lore, but i think it's cool so i'm sticking with it)

anyways sorry for the long ask, but i got thinking a bit too hard and your blog is probably the thing that got me back into utmv

anyways i hope you have a lovely day!!

I hope this is how you pictured it :)

Ice/slushie consistency when cold nm my beloved

[morgantapper]

Yan!MoonBoys

Meant for my fic blog @imagine-silk

Steven

Everything in his life got flipped around very quickly. He knew you from before and was kind of dating you. So when he goes through the events of Moon Knight a part if him cracks because now he's lost everything. There's just you.

The wants something to anchor him. He knows what he's doing it bad but this is the man who got an ankle restraint instead of seeing a doctor, he's not going to just hope for the best without drastic measures.

Kidnapping you is simple to a concerning amount. But in your defense, you didn't expect to be kidnapped by a guy you've known for two years.

He routinely asks you to just be as always, that it will be better for the both of you if you did. He's not exactly threatening you but the option of leaving is a full no and never.

And if you do escape nothing really happens. He's not going to hurt you ever, he wants you to stay with him forever so he won't even think about it. He'll just go on a rant on how he doesn't want you to leave him, that he's being selfish but he doesn't think he can handle himself without you.

Marc

Of course he knows who you are, Steven pined over you for a while before you started dating. He is not in love with you at first. His whole reasoning of keeping you locked in was his love for Steven. He would and has killed for him so if Steven needs to keep his partner inside they are not leaving.

You didn't really know about Marc so that was a whole other level of scary to add to the list. He makes it clear he has no interest in harming you but he's not going to help you either.

But he does get attached to you and that sparks paranoia. Everything is put away and blocked off, you can't even go into the kitchen. The window gets covered on the very very off chance someone will see you on the top floor. The flat is, for lack of better words, baby proofed.

He will go on about your safety. All of it is for your safety. And if you leave he freaks out. You won't make it very far. When you get back he'll rant about how he can only protect you here, how they both need you. If you are still defiant he will lock you in a room.

[skynapple]

OH NO LOOK WHO CAME HOME

In Which Madi Zaynes On Main

MC being covered in blood in an angsty situation to start the card off is not what I expected.

Overall this card is a really beautiful display of patience, recklessness, and communication! The characters are put in a scenario where we really get to see how well they understand each other without necessarily having to say anything outright all the time.

We ALSO see that the opposite is true! It's not a miscommunication issue, just that there's some consequences to not saying anything.

There's also somewhat of a character flaw in MC that's really cool to see fleshed out because it's a common trait across all her interactions with any LI - and that is her blatant disregard for her own well-being. We know that she does it, but are not entirely sure about her motivations for it. Is it insecurity? Selflessness? Self-righteousness? Does she really just not care? Has growing up so lonely given her a strong sense of dying dutifully and honorably is better than living without purpose, alone? They definitely address it and I appreciate that they hint that the issue isn't going anywhere and won't be fixed overnight, but it's at least brought up.

More Thoughts™️ about the card under cut!

I'm live blogging this so bear with me

MC is so cool! She bravely rescued people but to no one's surprise she didn't think, just leapt forth rashly and got hurt

Zayne is immediately attentive but he must be so worried

OH HE WAS WORRIED-WORRIED. BROKE CHARACTER AND EVERYTHING

Their world really is getting worse :( these disaster wanderer attacks are getting more frequent across all the LI's cards

Zayne's sarcasm will never not send

She's worried that HE'S worried, and they're both trying to comfort each other, but he's immediately SO good at reading her and quelling her fears in such a way only he can (rants about medical reasons he should be the one attending to her adfhjlgd)

PROOF MC HAS KILLER BICEPS AND ABS

NOT ZAYNE IMMEDIATELY ROASTING HER

He- he keeps making excuses to see her I cannot 😭😭

Even on his break time omg he just wants to take care of herrrrrr

Omg their banter HE'S STILL WORRIED DESPITE IT ALL

Already inviting her over to his place my god he wants the excuse and of course she catches on

HIM SUDDENLY OPENING THE CURTAIN TO CUT HER OFF WHEN SHES TALKING ABOUT FINDING "THE ONE" AND IMMEDIATELY DENYING IT HAHAHAHA

"Uncle Doctor" i'm cryinggggg there's really no such thing in English, it's sending me that they LITERALLY translated the Chinese phrase this way

Omg him softly scolding her finally for scaring him, it's part ways him opening up when he's been holding that in for weeks, but he's so so patient, he'll wait for the right moment, the right tone, but he's gotta say it! And part just like, no she really does keep doing this 💀

HELPPP MEEEEEE HE JUST BLATANTLY CALLS HER BEAUTIFUL MY GODDDDDDDD HES YEARNING RIGHT IN FRONT OF HER!!! TO HER FACE IN FACT!!!!

HE JUST STRAIGHT UP TOOK HER HOME IM SO ADFHLKHDSDFHJDG HELP!!?

Omg I forgot this is the Greyson reveal card, now we have a model AND a voice, it's so cute

Not Greyson ratting Zayne out as usual 😭 absolute rat

OH ARE YOU SERIOUS SHES REALLY DOING THIS FIRST THING IN THE MORNING

EXCUSE ME MA'AM HES NOT A ROBOT WHAT ARE YOU DOING???

HE'S SO DONE WITH HER LOLLLLL

I'M YELLING THIS MAN IS SO TOUCH STARVED

No but literally the way they understand each other without words!!!!! She knows he's burying himself in his work for whatever reason and NEEDS this... and he's gonna let her cause he knows she needs this too 🥺

OK BUT HES SO- HE REALLY LIKES WHEN HIS FACE IS TOUCHED HUH

HE'S TRYING SO HARD TO KEEP UP WITH QUIPS SO HE STAYS COOL BUT YOU CAN REALLY SEE HIM SLIPPING

/Madi died for a bit/

OK BUT HES SO SOFT FOR HER GENTLY TWIRLING HER HAIR AHHHHH

O-OH MY GOD? he's not jealous of Greyson I don't think but he's- he's curious???

WAIT IM GOING TO ACTUALLY FREAKING CRY

HE'S STILL NOT OVER ALMOST LOSING HER AHHHHHHHHHHHH

No but they're communicating 🥲😭 he's always been so clear in his communication with her ahhhh

"I don't want others to tell me that you might be in danger. It would make me feel like an outsider." THROWING MY MISERABLE SELF OFF A FREAKING CLIFF. But lets assume it's happened before!! I'm sure it has!!!! I'm so glad he's speaking up about it but my god 😭 the angst

She's figured out how to answer so it's exactly what he needs to hear, no more quips or dodging, she's not being coy, I mean she's still being roundabout a LITTLE but it's in a way that gets to the same point and I do think it reassures him

[pansexual-puppy-pack]

re: this ask on eneiryu's blog and my paragraphs of tags on it

theo, he's prideful prior to his time in the skinwalker prison. if someone had saved him right as he was being taken, someone would've had to been hurt. i think kira would've been pushed out of the way or someone would've taken the sword out of her hands before rushing to theo and dragging him out of the pit.

let's say this was liam.

liam, who had never had anything good to say to theo, snatches kira's sword out of her hands and rushes towards theo. let's say he tosses it aside as he tries to drag him out of the pit.

he knows tara isn't real, so he doesn't try to harm her, just fight against her supernatural and undead strength. i think tara leaves scratch marks on theo's legs as he grabs onto liam and tries to pull himself up.

i think the skinwalker pit stays open. i think it stays open until someone falls into it.

i think scott has to run towards the pit to grab the sword before it tips over into the pit.

i think he yells. i think, for the first time, he yells at liam. why would he want to save someone who he had assisted in killing scott? the very same person who broke the pack?

i think liam pushes theo behind him, but doesn't fight back. i don't think he tries to say anything.

but he does think it.

i said that i wanted to save you, somehow. and this is how. i want to save you from yourself, from feeling guilty about sending someone to someplace none of us know anything about, because you're such a good person. you're so empathetic, you'll feel the pain, even if you don't feel anything but rage right now.

liam doesn't fight back. he waits until everyone has had their turn to yell at him, he waits until they leave, one by one, and leaves him with theo, who isn't healing.

but the scratches—they took away theo's extra powers, josh's and tracy's. it's just theo, and they both know that it'll stay that way.

liam asks theo if he has anywhere to go. theo says no. of course he doesn't. he never had.

begrudgingly, liam takes theo and walks him to his home. he thinks about how hayden probably broke up with him during the arguments—he spaced out halfway through malia's rant.

they don't talk.

theo doesn't ask, liam doesn't answer.

they just... are.

theo makes a silent pact to protect liam. from everything. for the rest of his life.

because no one had ever done such a kindness for him, especially not if they didn't want something in return.

but he doesn't want to be better. he wants to kill for liam, save his life a hundred times over, because that's what liam did for him, despite what had happened between them before.

he'll kill for liam. he'll kill for anyone liam wants him to protect.

liam later realizes this, as the months pass by, and tries to help theo to gain some independence. liam guesses he hadn't had any independence since before he had met the dread doctors.

theo takes a long time to better himself. longer than in canon. he has his pride, he has his strength, he has his resilience, he has his cunning, and it takes him a very long time to give up his evil.

after all, the doctors said that true evil can only come from what was truly good, and if theo was an ordinary evil, that means that he always had been.

liam tries to get theo to see the good in himself, even though liam's struggling to find it on his own. he can't see the good in theo—at least, he can't express it. he tries his hardest to get his mind to work, to see beyond the facade theo had crafted over ten plus years, so whatever he can see, theo could probably see.

and i think it takes a very long time.

[hetalia-club]

Another rant about my ex hopefully the last one ever as I decided in some self reflecting to distance myself from him entirely, hopefully not even acquaintances.

I need to vent to someone, the problem is I don't have anyone I'm comfortable enough IRL to share all this with without them giving me those sad eyes and a 'there there'. So I'm using my blog. You don't have to read this. feel free to scroll on by. If you don't get triggered easily I would like if you did, you don't have to give me feed back or advice, I'm not looking for that. I'm mostly wanting to get what he did to me in the open so I can hopefully move on with my life. Throwing it into the void of the internet is better than writing it into a book and locking it in a drawer forever. People have to know how terrible he was to me. He shouldn't get off scot-free and have happiness while I still suffer. I tried to keep this as vague as possible and I'm not going to go into deep detail of all my abuse because a lot of it I still don't want to face for myself. Tw for abuse of all kinds. If you read this and at any point think "Hey that sounds kind of like my relationship." This is your wake up call to run far far away and not look back.

I Would just like to put it out there that I am NOT still in love with my ex. I hate that mother fucker. I hate that I probably gave him a confidence boost by trying to get back together. He does not deserve that. He deserves to be as miserable as he made me for 5 years. I genuinely believe he is objectively a terrible person. I know him very well and he is a very manipulative person. I don't think he truly cares about anyone but himself. I think the only reason he wants a GF is for someone to take care of his house chores and 'other' needs. That's it. He does not enjoy being in relationships. He does not like having serious conversations and he is mean as hell when you try and make him do something he does not want to do...which is anything. And he also won't tell you he didn't want to do it until after he did it and then he'll make your life miserable all week.

Was I just 'jealous' that he moved on? No, I don't think that's even correct really. I Truly think I'm petty and I don't want him to be happy. I want him to stay alone and miserable because that's all he deserves really. He mentally abused me for actual years why should he get to have a new girlfriend? He doesn't deserve one. He also STILL has not told me he's seeing anyone which I find INSANE because he texts me all the time. I normally reply lately I've been ignoring him. I know now that I mentioned getting back together he thinks I 'want him' and he gets off on the idea that I'm 'waiting around for him'. Well truly it couldn't be further from the truth. I think I hate him. I hate how he treated me, I hate how he moved on and I hate how he refuses to tell me, I hate his stupid Jeep Truck, I hate his temper, I hate his stupid uggo face, I hate his body, I hate his mustache he never trims no matter how many times I asked, I hate how he would bully me into crying and then once I started crying he would tell me I was over reacting and try and frame it like I were the crazy one and I would believe that I was. You don't have to beat someone to abuse them....Right? No he wouldn't do that...he loves me, he says so all the time so he must mean it, right? Some men are more upfront about their abuse, others hide it in crafty little ways eating away at you until you believe you are the problem. It MUST be you right? He keeps saying so. I mean... he's never hit you. He's never threatened you or scared you, he's never hurt you, or has he? Honestly you can't really remember, but it doesn't sound like something he would do. And he said he didn't. You're just over reacting like he says. You're hysterical. You need help. You should get therapy to make his life easier. You should stop bothering him so much with 'relationship problems' that you probably caused. You're such a bad partner. You're lucky he's with you. Who would want to be? You're actually crazy! You're losing your mind. He said jump, now ask him how high. He bought you designer clothes, how could he be abusive? He spent so much money on you! So what if he just wants you to do 'a little something' to pay him back for it later? It's not asking much. Those sunglasses were 600 dollars. It's just thirty minutes of your life it'll be over soon, don't be dramatic. Oh my god! It's not even that big of a deal you're over reacting again. He said he loves you, if you love him you should give him these things he wants, he gives you what you want, right? right?

Just a small story to help you understand the kind of relationship I was in for 5years. One weekend he asks me if I want to go out to eat. I agree. He tells me I can pick the place. I say I want Outback. I was super into Cheese Fries these few months and they have really good ones. He said okay. Didn't say it didn't sound good or maybe we eat someplace else. He said it sounded good and he would pick me up at 7, cool.

He picks me up and we're talking about dumb shit on the way to town we live in the middle of nowhere so it's a 45 minute drive to any decent civilization. Well about half way there I just casually ask him if he called ahead at Outback. This was right after Covid when everything just started to open back up, so places were doing limited seating, so I knew we would have to call or there was no way we would get a table. He said that, "yes" he did in fact call and he told them 8. After he said this our previous conversation just sort of stopped I would say something and he would give me like a one word answer but he was being really quiet. I knew something was up but didn't pry because he doesn't like that.

We get to Outback, go inside and I ask him. "did you give them your name?" as we wait in line at the host booth. He straight ignores me, pretends i didn't say a word. We finally get up there and i look at him and he just stars ahead at noth and I'm like "Um 2 for 8 under *his last name*" The lady was like "Yeah we don't have anything for 2 at eight at all." I look at him and i was like "Didn't you call?" And he was like "Hua? What? No..." And I was like. "Dude you said you called when i asked you in teh car?" and he goes. "You never asked me if i called, if you did i would have told you no." And i was like. "Why are you lying? I'm not stupid you can't tell me i didn't ask you that it was 20 minutes ago my memory isn't that bad. and he goes. "Okay well I didn't call!" In a loud whisper and then I look to teh lady and was like do you have anything? And she was like it's a 2 hour wait.

So I'm pissed obviously, he's pissed for whatever reason. We leave and when we get back in the car I was like. "Why did you lie to me about something so stupid?" And he starts SCREAMING. Telling me "He knew this would happen" That "I'm just mad because I didn't get my way" That I'm "Spoiled" and "I know you're just mad because we can't eat at Outback you always get this way about food!" and you know I was pretty pissed we were no longer eating at Outback seeing how he told me I could pick the place and I told him I wanted cheese fries. But I was mainly pissed that he just lied to me about something so dumb to my face and like I wouldn't find out when we got there. So he's yelling at me and I'm just sort of meekly trying to plead my case while he flies off the handle like a crazy person over something so dumb. And I was like "Just take me home, I don't want to be here anymore." he panics and was like. "I'm not taking you home I drove all this way to eat I'm not wasting money on gas because you're throwing a bitch fit. Pick somewhere else." So I picked Roadhouse, they also have cheese fries, not as good but beggars can't be choosers. I could tell that this choice irritated him. But he begrudgingly called and I could hear the phone conversation because it was just me and him in the car and the guy on the phone said it was only a 45 minute wait. He got of the phone and looked me in teh eyes and lied to me again saying they said "it was a two hour wait there to." I didn't tell him I heard the dude on the phone say only 45 minutes because I didn't know how he would react and honestly. It's been like 30 minutes now of just sitting in the car and him screaming at me so I'm just like "Pick anywhere I don't fucking care I would rather you took me home but just pick someplace. I will eat road kill at this point if we can just stop fighting" He insisted I pick so I was like "Okay Chilies, let's go there no one is ever there." They also have cheese fries, and our Chilies sucks so there truly is no one ever there idk how they are even still open, I believe it may be some sort of Mafia front, that is the only explanation. The parking lot is always empty.

Then he flips it... See this is how you start to see just how he would wear me down mentally until I just gave up. He goes. "Why do you always get to pick the place we eat?" And I was like "You told me to!" And he was like "Only because You'll get mad if I say anything about where we eat, see you're so mad at me now because we can't eat at Outback like you wanted everything is about you. You never ask where I want to eat." And I was like. "OMG WTF are you talking about!?" which was the first time I raised my voice this entire conversation. So he starts punching the steering wheel over and over again. So hard that the car is literally shaking and he broke the volume control button on his steering wheel. I'm just sitting there looking at him like 😒 when he stops there is like five minutes of silence as he just glares ahead of us in the parking lot and he goes. "How about *insert name of our local sushi place*" And I'm like "That's fine, let's just go anywhere." Then. There is a complete 180 on his personality. He's all smiles on the drive there, opening up a conversation about something (can't remember what) and I'm still seething inside because, that was all so stupid and immature. When we get there it's an hour and 1 1/2 wait and he tells the guy "yeah that's fine we'll wait" Like fuck you...we could have stayed at Outback. I still want French fries you bitch you took me to maybe the one place in town I can't order cheese fries, the whole reason we are out tonight, because I told you I was craving cheese fries. He took me to the bar and he was all flirty and he bought me an expensive drink with his typical. "Anything you want baby" Okay sure anything I want except fucking cheese fries, I guess! This is how he would get when he were trying to show off. But it was all just a mask he could take on and off as easily as normal people blink their eyes. I asked him. "So what was that punching the steering wheel all about?" And he was like. "What do you mean?" And I was like. "How you were repeatedly punching the steering wheel, why were you doing that? Was that supposed to be me or what?" Well if you guessed denial and gaslighting you would be right, though it happened less than 2 hours ago. According to him "I never did that. what are you talking about? I mean I put my hand on the steering wheel but I never punched it." So I dropped it. Why argue with someone who is a pathologically liar? We fought a lot because I never knew when he was telling me the truth because he would lie all the time about the dumbest shit, stuff he KNEW I was there for, conversations he denied happening. Ones I could literally prove with text messages and he would tell me, you took that the wrong way.

These are the kind of fights we had CONSTANTLY. (Along with some other bigger ones involving other things) So yes. They did start to feel normal. Being told I didn't know what I was talking about when I knew better was just a weekly occurrence. I always assumed he was lying to me. He eventually succeeded in convincing me I was 'crazy' and I went and got a major increase on my medication, with the promise from him that he would go to therapy for his anger issues, never happened. He all but forced me to go get on the birth control shot because I couldn't take the pill, it makes me violently ill and I have morning sickness while on it and am miserable every day. And the shot absolutely destroyed my hormones and I don't think my body ever recovered from it to this day. Which he assured me he would pay for, and then after the third shot I asked to him why hasn't he paid me back he claims this never happened and he never said he would pay for my birth control and why would he? It's not his birth control (okay crazy was of looking at it, i guess this is only for me then) So I told him I was going to go off of it because it was 300 bucks every month and I had to drive all the way to Fort Wayne to a woman's clinic. He said "No don't go off it I'll pay" he paid for it once, saw how much it was and was like "Fuck that" Also funnily enough the shot made me lose ALL attraction to him. Once it got regulated in my system I and nothing for him anymore, he disgusted me. Everything he said and did gave me the ick. I was in denial for about 2 years and tried to convince myself I did find him attractive and that it would come back eventually, never did. Both of these were medical abuse btw, I am aware of that now.

So as you can imagine as I was not attracted to him anymore I hardly wanted to sleep with him. But he would guilt trip me for it until I would feel bad and just do whatever he wanted. Even going as far as to mess with me in my sleep, I would pretend I didn't know but I did. It always made me so sad that the next morning he would act as though nothing happened, I know he knew I was awake, I am an extremely light sleeper. It's almost like he liked the idea that I didn't say anything to him about it. But he also knew I wouldn't say anything because I don't like confrontation and I knew he would deny it anyway. And this is just straight up SA

The entire idea of a new relationship to me now just feels so...what's the word I want? Tainted maybe? I don't think I believe in romantic love. I don't think he deserves love. I also don't think he's capable of giving love. I don't think he'll ever change, he has told me before. "This is who I am and I'm not changing for you or anybody." he truly believes he is a nice and good person which is the worst part. He thinks he's just fine the way he is. That everyone else is the problem. But the way I see it there is a common denominator. I should have realized when we first got together that his apprehension to tell me about ANY of his past girlfriends was odd. Not even their names. I still don't know who he's all dated or how many people or anything. Even if he insisted I give him my entire sexual history basically on the first month of our relationship. But I ask him who his last GF was and he gets all "You shouldn't be asking me that, the past is the past, don't worry about it" I thought that was weird he didn't even want to tell me names your GF knowing who your most current ex is, is not weird, it's very normal. He never spoke about them, it was like they never existed. But I knew he dated a girl with a kid once. I asked him about it and he pretended to not know who I was talking about, of course surprise surprise. Before we got together I overheard his cousin at a party say that he is a "very sneaky guy and a liar". She didn't say it in a nice way either she said it with a lot of distain like she was speaking from past experience. She was calling him for what he was and I wish I would have absorbed what she had said. I wish I would have asked her "What do you mean?" I wish could go back in time and tell myself not to say yes to a date with him. I should have known that the first time we ever hung out he pressured me to do things even though I pushed him away multiple times and he kept moving his hand back. I should have know he was terrible I should have been able to see it. I hate myself for not seeing it. I would always give him the benefit of the doubt, I would blame myself for not speaking up, not calling him out. But I know it was all him. He had me right where he wanted me, he knew me better than anyone he knew what I wouldn't react to out of social anxiety. I hate myself, but I hate him more for what he's done to the way I look at all men. Oh how I hate them! They all unfairly get blamed for the way he treated me and it's not fair. I hate that I meet a new man and assume he is terrible, a wolf in sheep's clothing. A liar and manipulator. I always wonder, what is he like when he gets mad? What does he think about the word no? I hate it. I've never hated anyone more. The worst part is I can't let him go. He is still in my mind after 7 months he still creeps in and I think about him. I wonder what he's doing, how he's doing. I hate it. And sometimes i miss him. But why? Why do I miss his abuse? What's wrong with me? What's wrong with him? Why do I fantasies about men who would treat me badly after being with him? Why do I feel like I'm not worthy of being treated like a decent human? Why do I only write relationships that are toxic and depressing with abuse and then apologies only for it to happen again? Is it a way of self therapy or is it something I really secretly desire? Why do I think that's what a relationship should be? Why can't I get him out of my head? Why can't I write cutesy romance with 'love' and kisses, why does it always turn into a tragedy? Why does it not feel like a good 'love' story until I've written abuse in some way? with someone hurting teh others what should be beyond repair for them to just forgive and forget? You all want to know like...the worst part honestly? In hindsight he kinda ugly fuckin' tho, fucking tragic. Like he's not even hot. What's the damn point.

[loveydovey-leviathan]

> reposted from my personal blog @mee-op

you reject their confession

obey me x gn!reader

.

Lucifer:

The man takes it like a champ.

He rarely develops crushes— and even then he's usually too busy to pursue it; so it stung right where it hurts when you rejected him.

But he couldn't get angry at you, you were all awkward smiles when he told you how he felt and he could tell you wanted to let him off gently.

He was incredibly relieved when you suggested staying friends (hoping that it meant he didn't ruin things between you and him— it's happened before).

You were someone important to him and he loved you. It'll just take some time to get over his romantic feelings.

The air around the two of you is awkward for a while. He needed some time to himself to sort everything out.

But after he initially gets over his dump— things would get back to normal. He starts to ask you to make his coffee again, you visit him late at night when everyone is already asleep so he'll be able to get some rest, doing your own thing next to him by the fireplace while he does paperwork.

He's glad that his confession didn't ruin things between you two, and whether as friends or more— he'll forever be grateful you came into his life.

Mammon:

Dude is heartbroken.

His crushes aren't rare per se— but when he crushes, he crushes hard.

It took him a bunch of time to work up the courage to ask you out, so when you rejected him he immediately wanted to cry.

But before the tears could fall he's back to his tsundere nature. He babbles on and on but he's talking too fast to make sense of any of it— but you could kind of piece together the words of 'he was just kidding'.

After a good 30 seconds, he blurts out a 'I have somewhere ta be!' and rushes to his room where he collapses and cries for a bit.

His funk lasts for a long time, and it's uncomfortable between you and Mammon for a while.

But over time he starts to get over it and tries hanging out with you again. Walking you to school, breaking into your room to tell you about his latest gig, making instant ramen at 1 am because that's all he's good at.

He was happy with you as friends during the beginning of the exchange program, so there isn't a reason you can't be friends now just because he had romantic feelings for you at one point.

Whatever your relationship is, he knows he can depend on you (you'll never catch him saying it though. maybe).

Leviathan:

This is going to be rough.

If Mammon's heartbroken, he's absolutely distraught.

He's managed to convince himself that because you rejected him, you now want absolutely nothing to do with him.

He rants about how sorry he is and how of course you wouldn't want to be friends with someone like him, let alone as partners.

And before you could get a word in, he's gone.

He stays in his room for over a week, and even when his brothers have convinced him to get out of his room— he's avoiding you like he would Lucifer after he spent a bunch of money on anime merch.

It takes a couple of his brothers to knock some sense into him; that just because someone doesn't reciprocate you're feelings, it doesn't mean they hate your guts and want you to die.

And once they managed to persuade him of that— he starts rambling about how you have to hate him now because of how long he's ignored you.

All in all, it's a complete and utter mess.

After he's finally calmed down, he and everyone else try to make a plan for you and him to 'make up'.

But that goes out the window when he just goes to you and cries about how sorry he is and how he's been treating you.

It takes a few minutes to calm him down, and you're going to have to take the reins from here.

He really doesn't know what to do to somehow not make everything seem like the two of you are only hanging out because someone's holding him at gunpoint.

Sitting next to each other at breakfast again, being his player 2 in games, making food based off of anime.

Before he knows it the two of you are hanging out like nothing ever happened. And he's kinda glad his confession didn't go anywhere because now that he thinks about it, he might not be ready for a romantic relationship.

Satan:

The most mature out of all of them, tbh.

He reads about this kind of stuff all the time, and he was semi-prepared when you rejected him.

Still hurt obviously, but he respects your decision.

He needs his alone time like anyone else does but he still makes sure to hang out with you from time to time to make sure you know he doesn't hold any kind of resentment towards you.

He kind of just sucks it up and moves on.

not really much to say here lol

Asmodeus:

His feelings are pretty complicated about the whole ordeal.

He's been in relationships before but he wouldn't say he felt stable in any of them if that makes sense.

He subconsciously thinks that all of them were with him because of how he looks, but you're the first person his charm didn't work on.

It took a while for him to navigate his feelings for you, and when he finally reached a certain conclusion he decided he needed to tell you.

His confession was light and casual, and when he got rejected he acted like it was no big deal.

It hurt in a place he's never hurt before and his thoughts are a complete mess.

But he still hangs out with you to kind of prove to himself that he's okay, and to procrastinate sorting out his emotions.

You're going to have to tell him to take some time for himself

It takes a couple of days just thinking about how he feels— but he eventually comes to the conclusion that he doesn't need to be in a romantic relationship with you to feel stable. You've made him feel that way even when the two of you are just friends.

He goes back to his usual peppy self afterward, and he's slightly more open to you.

Beelzebub:

His confession was a 'spur of the moment' thing. Once he realized he liked you romantically, he didn't really think and just told you.

When faced with your rejection, he doesn't really feel any different. He might be a bit confused about how he feels and excuses himself to go and think about it.

But he just figures out that he loves you and no matter if your relationship is platonic or romantic— you make him and his brothers happy and that's all he needs to know.

Belphegor:

It doesn't take long for him to realize he likes you romantically.

Before long he starts thinking about a confession (and a rejection) and decides that the best way to tell you is in the planetarium.

When you reject him he kind of just shrugs it off. He leaves so as to not make things uncomfortable between the two of you.

He doesn't act much differently after that. You're still his nap buddy and he's comfortable with you. He's alright being just friends and doesn't feel particularly hurt.

[pageofheartdj]

Hi!

I happened upon your blog and can I just say:

I'M SO GLAD TO SEE SOMEONE WHO AGREES WITH ME ABOUT THE COLLECTOR

He deserved a happy family and there was one right there in the Clawthornes but they were instead sent to the stars as what came across to me as a childish timeout, even though that probably didn't occur to anyone at the time.

It just feels like an unjustified ending for them, especially when there's a chance the Archivists are still out there, and they could find him and yet again traumatise the poor space cherub.

Anyway, I get far too worked up about this lil guy and his unhappy ending and he is definitely one of my top 3 faves (honestly they keep climbing the ranks and soon he'll likely be higher than my no.1, Hunter XD)

Feel free to have a long and overcomplicated discussion about him with me if you want!

~ Katsura

I am so MAD about their ending, I keep coming back to it to rant over and over again!!xD

I tried to find some peace with it but the more I thought about it, the more all those reasons felt more like excuses out of the context of the show and the character!!

'Oh he can be [this] now' feels more like some other character can be 'this', not Collector who never showed an interest in 'this'. The only interest he had was to belong. And they didn't get it! And NO, they are a kid, it's not their job to search for that place especially when the 'found family of the show' is RIGHT THERE!

I am upset because space is big and lonely and they don't need that! They never needed to see other planets! I saw people saying how he was trapped on Boiling Isles so it's great that he leaves. He was trapped in a BALL! He never properly SAW the Boiling Isles! It is FINE for him to stay but have a say in his freedom!

And of course the Archivists are out there and I am worried he will once again try 'kindness and forgiveness' route because he is a kid and kids are optimistic and prone to make the same mistakes over and over and we don't KNOW how bad their Siblings were!

They are my absolute fave(also had Hunter before xD) so I will be forever mad how they were Robbed! If this was what Dana meant by 'I don't like Happily Ever After' than this SUCKS! Because the show presents Collector's ending as a good ending and it is NOT. The 'they visit' feels like a scrap so we would shut up! ><

[fruity-phrog]

ok hi i read ur anon post i agree w everything n now i NEEED 2 know allll of ur thoughts abt colinmichael + colin's arc and also if u have any colinjamie/ bi jamie or roy hcs. love love love ur blog!!!!!😌💓💓💓🫂

First off, the serotonin you two anons are giving me is insane, this is such a nice ask and I am very happy rn. Thank you for actively inviting me to discuss my hyperfixation.

So most of my thoughts are compiled in the aforementioned anon post, but I have more so here you go:

Since you mentioned Colin's arc, there's something I've noticed. Ever since Colin has been canonicalized as queer, and even before when people simply headcanoned him as queer, his entire arc and history has been pretty much erased. He's not just this closeted guy on the team. He was a dick to Nate for the most of s1 and maybe even some of s2, but then had an uno reverse card pulled on him and got bullied. His character was developed throughout the seasons, especially when Jamie left. He began to change and stopped being Isaac's cocky right hand man. This is something most people forget as he progresses, something I think we need to remember simply because it's a part of his character.

I think that when Isaac and Jamie find out Colin and Michael are dating they will not let Colin forget Michael's height. Isaac definitely makes fun of Colin's height even though he's the same height as Jamie, so for him to be dating a man smaller than him? Instant comedy.

As for bisexual Jamie... firstly, just look at that man. Singular dangly earring. Ridiculous sitting positions. Eyebrow slits. Istg if he turns up one day with black nail polish I'm gonna throw something at my computer. But also, I think he doesn't really understand attraction to men. Obviously, with a dad like that, he has his fair share of toxic masculinity hurting his chances of coming to terms with any kind of sexuality. But I feel like sometimes, maybe as a kid or maybe as an adult, he'll look at a man and feel something and immediately go "Nope this is jealousy I am jealous nope nope nope". Also he definitely had a crush on Roy as a kid. But I'm not to sure about Jamie x Roy in the present. They strike me as more big brother/little brother vibes, but I can definitely see where the shippers are coming from.

And since we're talking about gay Ted Lasso - Barbara 100% has a crush on Rebecca. It's just a fact. She has a crush on her. Maybe that will segway into bisexual Keely being brought back because even though it's already canon no one talks about it.

Actually, I'm going to touch on that as well. Keely is canonically bisexual. Colin wasn't the first queer character - Keely was. "If I'm going to dip my toes back into the lady pool, I can't think of a better body of water to do it with than you." I know it was played off as a joke but it's still canon. I'll actually be quite disappointed if they don't revisit that because the GA has completely ignored it. Keely. Jones. Is. Bisexual. This is a fact.

Okay I've once again diverged from the plot of the ask so I'll steer it back with a theory (kinda). I mentioned this briefly in a post but I really want Colin to stand up against Isaac and the team's comments. Nothing much, just "That's rude". And when Isaac jokes about if Colin's gay, he just says "Yeah. I am. And I want you to stop it". He needs to address the things he said to stay in the closet and I'd love it to be like that.

I actually wrote a random fluff oneshot for Colin coming out. I still think he'll be outed, but I'd love for him to have some control before that happens.

Okie that is my rant. Thank you for asking, and thank you for the compliment about my blog! Have a nice and gay day <3

[nanamiscocksleeve]

hey, are you still open to confessions? if so, i have one - i'm like the worlds biggest kento simp but breeding kink... isnt my thing? idk, the concept of pregnancy in general kinda freaks me out, it also makes me dysphoric (i'm trans). it used to be a really major nope, but like. kento is kinda different. for him its not like,,,, im not against it? im fine with it. usually im like entirely neutral about it with regards to nanami. occasionally ill even be like okay i kinda Get It Now because nanami is so. yknow. he's so fucking attractive he can make almost anything hot uh. i am however um. i discovered thru kento that im kinda into the idea of cumplay,....,.,,,,.... and the idea of kentos load is um. its very. it sure is! it's one of the things ever! this better stay on anon or so help me (i have irls who follow my blog, and id rather not have them ask me about kentos cum the next time i see them)

Hello anon! Yes, still open for confessions!

It's ok to not be into breeding kinks. It's not your thing! That's fine.

But I get it when you say there are certain things we'd all do for Kento that we wouldn't do for anyone else.

Kento would be into cumplay if that's your thing. He's the sort of person to really want to please his partner. And he'll play it however you want, whether it's a creampie, cumshot, or a facial, as long you're comfortable and he has your consent, he'll make sure you're satisfied.

This is on anon don't worry lol.

Thank you for your confession.

We're doing secrets/confessions/rants/secrets! Inbox me!

[eldritch-spouse]

Hey friend! sorry if ill be ask spamming your blog but I recently fell in love with your universe and I feel like we were born under the same star. But wit that out of the way... here it goes

Some new strange phenomena have been sweeping the clergy

The Admin is popular with regular clients! Some have even tried to request some personal services. Admin has had enough! She's also sick of trying to act kind while she refuses the clients.

She had an idea though! She could take advantage of her recent popularity and gain the Clergy an extra buck or two. With the help of Patches, the admin released a life-like chibi doll to sell to customers for a limited time only! The price might be a little high, but plenty of customers are still willing to buy. (Is this OOC? Maybe, but I had so much fun with the idea so roll with it please)

I also thought it would be funny if the plushie had a little butt when you removed her dress, like this. With the adorable stiched eye staring at them, the staff couldn't resist! But what exactly do the staff do with their admin doll? (descriptions and NSFW welcome)

[I wasn't born under a star, I'm pretty sure some forest fiend thing laid an egg on my mom's doorstep and she just rolled with it. :)) That's a cute interpretation of her btw.]

I like the idea of a little merch line being started, though it decidedly has to be a little OOC, because Krulu probably wouldn't agree with such childish depictions of his host. Symbolism and imagery are important to siadar, an offensive or disrespectful (even if unintentionally so) illustration can register as an attack.

Some of the staff would be normal about this, emphasis on would be, if the doll didn't somehow smell like you. How did Patches achieve this? Irrelevant, the bigger question is why the pervert thought that would be a good idea...

Morell is decidedly less creepy about it. He'd keep the doll in one of his pockets or his scarf, giving it a squeeze every now and then. You might catch him cooing to it on occasion. If anyone catches him doing this, the shroom will die of shame.

Gallon actually keeps the doll on one of the higher shelves of his bar, maybe the glass rack that hangs from the ceiling. That way, almost no one can reach it. He feels like you're watching over him while he works.

Patches feels mildly gross about it, but he'll hold the doll up to his face when he's trying to get off while thinking of you. It's just comforting, he can almost pretend you're around him, holding him maybe. Hey, at least the doll stays clean.

Vinnel is customizing it. That's his thing. He's going to make a little jester suit for it, and get a little nose, maybe paint her face. It'll be the cutest one by far. Of course, he'll show it to you in hopes that maybe you'd enjoy actually dressing that way.

Santi (I'm sorry, I can only think of this lmao.)

Grimbly would love it if there was a pinker version, but beggars can't be choosers, right? He's going to hold mini you to his chest when he comes home from long shifts, get in his plush nest and rant about how the day sucked and you should be dating him by now.

No one knows Nebul has one until they see him running after Purpur, who is constantly stealing Admin dolly away to play with. It's kept in an elegant glass case nowadays, spotless.

Belo loves it to pieces, it's probably full of his fur. He keeps it in his room and nuzzles it whenever he can. The angel once was depraved enough to jerk off over it, immediately washed it and didn't touch the doll for a week in total mortification.

Fank-e is not thwarted by the price. He can buy one and find a way to ship himself like 100 3D prints! Hah, checkmate bitch. His doll is covered in stickers and weird stains. It feels mildly radioactive.

Sybastian's poor doll is drooled to not end. It smells like you, so he can't help licking it, which in turn becomes a masturbatory motion because mimic tongues are highly sensitive. So, in the end, you're likely to see him jerking off with the plush in his mouth.

[burned-lariat]

Okay...okay. Okay. So. I sat on this for a day and here's my two cents on yesterday:

Anyone who is even somewhat familiar with my blog knows that my opinion of Jex is not positive. It's been a very consistent part of my takes and replies and everything in between. Y'all know what the deal is.

The dialogue and scenes yesterday were truly something else.

Jex is in lust. Period. They barely know one another, and the info that has come out is surface level and mundane at best and forced out by circumstance at worst (see at: the gunshot fiasco). Most of their screentime is (implied) sex with Sonny as their aphrodisiac. Jokes have been made, rants have been typed, we all know exactly what we're watching.

It's that observation and knowledge that adds to just how irritating the conversation about leaving was. It's completely unearned!

We don't see them go on dates, we don't see them having a genuine conversation, we don't have that long-term "history" between them where they truly have a bond that isn't tied to trauma. Hearing them whine about Big Bad Sonny and his mob and Stupid Meanie Michael picking family over his vendetta (finally) makes them sound incredibly self-involved. More so than they already are, anyway.

And for Joss, who has friends/family/a life in Port Charlies, to openly make the decision to go into witness protection and run away with Dex (when there's a very good chance that Dex could leave the mob if he simply asked Sonny for his blessing), it makes her seem incredibly pathetic and dickmatized. She actually has a lot to lose by leaving, and she's doing it all because the sex is apparently that good. That's not selfless or heroic or an "act of love." It's selfish and vapid.

With Dex, we're seeing a blank slate continue being a blank slate. He said it best himself: he has no friends, no family, no nothing in this town besides staying in the mob. Any normal writer would see that and think "...Oh fuck! I need to remedy that!" But on GH, it's glossed over and made a BS angst point. And even then, no one would miss him. Sonny would move on, Michael already offered to send him away, and I'm willing to be that, eventually, Joss would find someone else. He's nothing, he came from nothing, and he'll turn into nothing. That's just sad.

And what really sells the awfulness is how, in the end, no one is leaving. They cried and whined and shared childish "I like yous" for nothing. The couple continues to have everything forced out: forced angst, forced meetings, forced feelings, etc. There is nothing organic to them, nothing truly exhilarating or intriguing. It's just one leg of the Trifecta of Suck; I bet you can guess the other two legs.

This show needs to cut their losses and break the pair up. Develop Dex and pair him with someone new or get rid of the character. Fix this Mini Carly crap we got with Joss and have her actually suffer and lose for once. What we have now is not working. At all.

[ayamisc]

manga rant. 7.26.09

(c) Hino Matsuri (Vampire Knight) (c) Bisco Hatori (Ouran High School Host Club) (c) Kishimoto Masashi (Naruto)

so anyway…. 4 mangas updated this week..

let's begin with BLEACH.. so the action i was anticipating.. wasn't THAT much of an action.. but it's okay i suppose… since that means nobody died yet… hahahaha.. i love the title and the main idea of the chapter though-- the enemy of my enemy is my friend. hmmm.. gives u something to think about, ne?

Naruto.. uhm.. let's see…. well, we see just how FAMOUS kakashi is….. and the mizukage is REALLY sexy now that she's all.. colored. hahaha…. oh and naruto… is really such a loser x__x but hey, who knows maybe he'll convert the raikage into one of his new fans….. and a war will be avoided.. hmmm… oh, and next week…. i think sasuke's gonna make his move…. and is sai going to tell sakura about THAT? o.0

Vampire Knight SIGH i swear, i swear. Yuki HAS to choose at some point… but really… it's making my head hurt. I swear, that series is full of masochists. >__> the whole lot of them.

zero liking yuki, but will without hesitation kill her upon sight.

kaname, who loves yuki…. but knows yuki loves zero…. but is still willing to give his everythin to yuki…..

and yuki… who loves someone else, but promises to stay by the other's side for eternity. WHAT THE HELL IS WITH THESE PEOPLE..err…VAMPIRES! >_>

Ouran High School Host Club YOSH! sooooooo, Mori-sempai can get PRETTY scary…. seriously…… but i really loved the humor of the chapter. plus, the unexpected CHUUUU hahahaha… hmmm.. i wonder how they'll face each other in the next chapter…. hahahaha

PS. This blog was originally posted on DeviantArt.