#but im too deep in it now folks this is just how its gonna be

[mimiatmidnight]

The new Barbie discourse on Twitter made me think of your post about it, but I went to find it on your blog and it's gone! Did you delete it?

Hehe that's funny. If you mean my review of the movie itself, the post is actually still up, but it's unreachable through tags cause the original gifmaker I used blocked me (fair!!). But you can still get to it through a direct link, which I'll put here for you.

I think I've seen some of the discourse you're talking about, and it's pretty funny how many people I've seen say that now that there's been time to separate from the hype, they can finally be honest with themselves and recognize their real opinions on the movie. Which is no shame, honestly! Hype-marketing is a hell of a drug. Just funny to look back at my review from back then and see how apparently there is no social pressure strong enough to suppress my innate hater nature.

[bcolfanfic]

please talk more about gale helping tbi john

in my noggin its something that's in a way dormant for a while. he has his lil breakdown in the stalag and everyone is worried about him. but even outside of his head taking a couple too many physical hits, its a war, he's been through some shit and they're in a POW camp do it doesn't really raise the amount of red flags that it would in any other setting.

but then the war is over and something still just seems. Off in a way that doesn't seem like its just POW brain fuckery. gale can see it in his eyes when he's talking to him that he's having a hard time focusing. he complains about his head hurting more now that he *can* complain more freely. but he goes back home to wisconsin to his folks and gale doesn't really hear much from him (sorry i know its a cop out lmao but in this mollie lalaland im saying gale called the wedding off for you don't understand me anymore </3 reasons).

till john's sister calls him (: is all sniffly and teary telling gale she doesn't know *what* the war did to her brother but it's not good, it's concerning their family and other folks they know, and she's scared they're gonna send him away. (i looked it up and there were a few military hospital rehab hospital programs after the war, but they were very limited and tbh john would hate that too). called him because he knew him and gale were close, maybe seeing him might help? if he's not too busy?

which ofc he's not. goes to wisconsin immediately. a talks to his ma who said the doctor said he clearly has some sort of head trauma but they don't really know much else. and she doesn't *want* to send him away herself but. their little town is talking and she's scared something will Happen and force her hand in it.

poor john. he isn't completely gone but just. isn't doing good. headaches got worse, which makes everything else 100x worse because of how frustrating that is in itself. gets angry when he gets panicked, gets frustrated when the Words won't Word right. feels like a failure in a lot of ways. it does his heart good to see gale again too but he doesn't wanna stomp all over his life. can't mess up his perfect gale who deserved to be the first to run <3 gale who in his mind deserves a lot better than he does </3

but his loyalty to gale also means he realllly can't say no when he's begging him to let him help. finds him comforting, and a different kind of comforting than his mom and sister- which he really missed.

a whole lot of frustrated tears when gale pushes him a little, makes him read out loud a little more than he really wants to, makes him take more deep breaths than he feels like he has in him when he's frustrated. but it's all coming from a place of love ): john is gale's whole world ):

[ko-existing]

https://x.com/postdisclosure?s=21

Do u think aliens exist? I saw this profile on twitter and i thought maybe aliens were spreading non dualism to make us go crazy or spiral out of control 😭😭😭

You promise your not some malevolent alien???

Im only 13 and shifting realities has ruined my life and taken away my innocence. I just keep going down rabbit hole after rabbit hole. Im insatiable right now. I just wanna know whats real. 😭😭

Literally from "no concepts," to loa, to shifting, astral projection, alien, conspiracy theories, demons, alchemy, angels, folk spiritual practices, witchcraft....ever since I was 11 and came across shiftok I dove deep into all these esoteric studies

And while "no concepts" feels the best, when you chnaged your pfp I got scared 😭😭😭 because it happened when I came across this community of people that think aliens are gonna come for disclosure and theyre not sure if theyre good or bad, but that humanity needs to know. It was such a stupid synchronicity...maybe i dreamed up this way...because im so scared of all this crazy esoteric knowledge i know now. All my friends think im crazy, but they also think its cool, but also dont have the mental fortitude to dive as deeply as i did 😭😭😭 im all alone

Theres these beings that esoteric people on 4chan talk about, theyre called mantids and they can control your brains😭😭😭 theyre partially aliens

Idk what to believe, but again, i even tried witchcraft and spell work, and astrology. EVERYTHING over these past two years to find out the truth of reality. I have over a terabyte of files worth of esoteric knowledge. And i still don't know!!! I wish i never came across tiktok and did this deep dive into the unknown. I wish I had just been a normal middle schooler

I wish i just found loa and non dualism first

Do you have any advice? I know, I think u might be an alien. But ur probs not lol.

My parents and grandparents cant even help...all they care about is work and keeping our lives organized. My mom and dad told me im just going down rabbit holes for no reason. My family laughs that im into all this esoteric stuff. I actually think they think its a cool quirk in the family. So shallow😭😭😭😭😭😭 im too young for this mental illness

But its too late, I know too much...

Any other no concepts people, please say anything to this post

Ur guys words have been the thing that makes the most sense. But this awakening/noticing is intense and nobody around me is going through this 💔❤️‍🩹😭🫶🏻

jesus christ???????

1. Anon with all due respect, your first question.. if you know i'm an AV/" " account, where does the belief in aliens fit in?

2. In a slightly concerning tone, don't you see how out of touch all of this sounds?

3. At your young age of 13 you might want to stay away from social media for a bit because.. this does not sound healthy anymore😬 over a terabyte of files worth esoteric knowledge.. jesus christ

[manie-sans-delire-x]

I think you're decontextualizing too much and talking from a privileged point of view. I'm not arguing with the objectivity of what your point is, but it's a very bland flat hill to die on, in my opinion. People can totally agree to disagree, but the whole "good luck living this way" or "it's never gonna happen" is nothing but a shrugging off problems just because they don't belong to you.

Of course trans folks have deeper issues, we've been fighting in a society that, by default, does not accept us and we're forced to explain our very existence on a daily (or whoever cares to, to be honest I dropped that one ball there). So that's why it's important to make people who are coming from said privileged spots (mind, I'm not using the word "privileged" to hop on a high horse and offend anyone) understand how some things are very easy adjustments to make to accommodate minorities. And you don't really need to know/profoundly understand /why/ it's important for them, you can simply trust it is if they say so.

It's like saying "why would I use City money to build a stupid ramp when wheelchair users can struggle a little and learn to climb a 3 inches step" or "why would I stop staring at that person's ass if it's out and it's natural for me to look at it" because you want to be better and it's not that deep.

Yet again, agree to disagree if adding "assigned at birth" is such an inconvenience. No one is word obsessed, but personally speaking I'll bend the usage of my language as much as I can to make sure everyone around me is comfortable and feels safe, I don't care and need to know why.

How am I decontextualizing or talking from a privileged point of view? I mean I suppose I am in that I am not trans? I'll give you that.

Why is my point of view a bland hill to die on but insisting on changing female/male to afab/amab isnt?

No I just truly believe and came to the realistic conclusion it will never happen, not in any of our lifetimes at least. Do you really expect that this is going to become the new normal, in every country and culture? Seriously?

Yeah damn straight Im shrugging it off, I cant help people who are determined to be unhappy over word choice. Its not my problem, as you said. Everyone elses life will go on as normal, only they will be stuck on this and being unhappy, only hurting themselves.

Changing a language is not "very easy adjustment", not at all. I mean clearly, or else all this fighting wouldnt be happening right? And ok, say English changes. What, now every other language in the world has to change? Oh boy, thats going to lead to a lot of confusion and fighting. Sounds kinda problematic too, to insist other cultures and countries have to change their languages to match the more enlightened English. Colonist vibes.

Lets have realistically attainable goals. Lets focus on what really matters- like violent hate crimes against transpeople. People who are sooo passionate about political correctness and word choice should maybe, idk, do something real to help. Volunteer or work to help transpeople. But see they dont actually care about transpeople, they just get off on the self righteousness and false sense of moral superiority.

Its not about understanding why its important to them, I understand that it is. But unfortunately, reality doesnt give a shit about peoples emotions or whats important to them. (and clearly its not ok to disagree, because then you get labeled as a terf or whatever else new acronym...)

If you want to compare it to that, its more like if people in wheelchairs insisted that all stairs should be banned- ramps only- and you cant call them disabled anymore, everyone else is un-disabled. Society will never build itself around to a minority population, and shouldnt because it makes no sense.

Its not about "doing better" or peoples feelings. This is the main difference in thought process I think- some people view it as a moral social issue, some people view it as a issue of reality and logic.

What is a female? What is a male? A woman? A man? Whats the differences between them? Whats the difference between sex and gender? Are trans people actually transsexual or transgender? Is it even possible to be transsexual since you will never have the desired sex's gametes? Can someone be a female man or a male woman? At some point we need some god damn definitions. We cant just make words mean whatever we want them to.

Why not just have females, males, and transfemales and transmales?? Men, women, transmen, transwomen. That makes way more sense. Why would the majority and a whole ass language change to fit the minority? And even with the use of "cis", "trans" is still in use so attaching "cis" is pretty redundant either way!

[winderlylandchime]

1/3 And here we are folks. The finale. I apologize for how long this could be because it was A LOT: ‘Im not ready for this to end. I don’t think you understand just how scared and not ready i am’ He is a mess btw, his hair is sticking in all directions, he spilled his drink bc he knocked it over with his cast and he is probably 5 seconds away from crying so i already know this is gonna be a rollercoaster. And because he couldn’t sit still he even brought out his stress ball that he bought like a month ago. Anyway, one last episode update: the episode starts with Mikey narrating ‘ew, i forgot about that. Make it stop’ ‘AHHH BRIAN LOOKS SO FUCKING GOOD! DAMN JUSTIN LOOKS GOOD TOO! BEAUTIFUL! LOOK AT THEM!..can Michael shut up now?’ ‘Fuck you, these ads are hilarious. Does she know who the fuck she came to for hel- SEX ALWAYS SELLS!’ And we are at the stag party! ‘Thank god thats done. I didnt wanna be rude but holy fuck Tad was annoying. Ted you can do better. Okay but Brian isn’t gone, he’s just getting married? Theyre acting like he died *looks at me confused* whats going on? Why dont they just fuck the stripper together? Why is blondie looking at him like that? *snaps his fingers* ah! He wanted to fuck him together.’ And we are at Brian/Gus scene ‘this is so fucking cute! And they act like he didnt care about the kid! Oh fuck you mel’ and Mel and Brian are now alone ‘they would have all the happiness in the world if ONLY their fucking friends learned to mind their business. Aww look at Brian admiring his work’ Mel says that considering what he’s sacrificing line ‘Nah fuck this and fuck her, everyone literally makes and made it their business to make it their number 1 priority to always interfere with Brian’s life. And it is NEVER to make it better. But they NEVER say no to his money. *throws the ball at mel on tv* what? She stressed me out, its a stress ball!’ ‘That smile was the smile of a man who is so used of people hitting him below the belt. I fucking hate it here. And i fucking hate all of Brian’s friends, i will never forgive them for how they treat him’ we are at that mikey/brian scene with the flashback ‘what the fuck is this? (Mikey says he jerked off to brian) Now why the fuck would he say that to him? This whole scene felt out of place and weird’ And we are at the scene with Britin where they decide to call off the wedding ‘thats adorable. Aww he wants to cuddle. Blondie, he cuddled you after you cheated, what are you talking about? (Justin has his brian kinney speech) what..bro, what is happening? so hes mad he’s not fucking guys? See, i told you he wanted a threesome. WAIT PAUSE THE FUCKING EPISODE NOW *i pause it* HAS HE BEEN MONOGAMOUS SINCE THE PROPOSAL? I thought they were still fucking around? But also blondie wanted monogamy, what? Im confused, theyre confused, we’re all confused’ Brian asks about New York ‘hold the fuck up, why is new york being mentioned? Why would he go there over one fucking review? Brian knows he’s sacrificing his career…oh no. IM CONFUSED, can he only paint in new york? Do they not have paint brushes in Pittsburgh?’ And the sacrificing part is up ‘he did the same shit with LA. But that was different!! He had a job offer from a director! Damn it you too blondie? WHAT IS HAPPENING? What the fuck just happened? What did i just watch?’ And we are at the scene where Britin announces theyre not getting married ‘ooohhh fancy! THATS RIGHT DAPHNE! JUSTIN HAS EVERYTHING! Ahhhh look at them! THEY LOOK FINE AS FUCK! Brian has been wearing the fuck out of that stripped suit tho. (They announce it) *he’s dead silent and his arm with the cast is covering his mouth* oh thank fucking god *he sits back and lets out a deep breath while his arm is in his hair* i didnt wanna judge but that was one of thee worst ideas they’ve had. We are once again on the same page boys! Party, fuck and just enjoy life.’ And now we are at Brian’s meeting ‘that ad is the second worst idea he’s had. TELL HER BRIAN! HA! THATS RIGHT! THATS MY BABY! IM SO PROUD OF HIM!’

OH FUCK WE’RE REALLY IN IT NOW FRIENDS. HERE WE ARE.

The stag party is a cute moment but right? Why didn’t they fuck that guy together? They can be married and nonmonogamous.

They sure as fuck do love to fuck around in his life and not to make it better but are always happy to take a handout.

WHY WOULD HE GO THERE OVER ONE FUCKING REVIEW? fucking this a million times. it makes no fucking sense. Am I addressing that in my fic? I’m sure as shit trying to.

A job offer from the film director DID make LA different. Do they not have paint brushes in Pittsburgh? That’s a fucking great question Brother!

It was one of the worst ideas they have ever had but they didn’t need to send Justin to NYC to undo it (and then the final scene).

[ratlastheseus]

I dont do rant posts like ever but. Idk i cant get it out of my head so im gonna ramble here. I know talking to my grandma about it wont change her mind so I wont bother wasting her time or mine, but if you’re like me and you have deep and personal beef with the american conservative brand of “christianity” then feel free to read on.

I went on a road trip with my grandma this past weekend to visit some family 5 hours away in ar-kansas. It was a really nice time! But at one point when we were pulling out of a gas station there were a couple homeless folks holding signs at the intersection. My grandma makes a point of reading out loud everything they had written on those signs and then says to me: “Makes you wonder how many of these people are Actually homeless. They could all just be pretending, to get your money. You gotta work for your money. Can’t expect handouts.” And I mean FUCK DUDE!!!!! What an absolutely monstrous way to think about your fellow human beings! My blood was litcherally boiling but its taken me until now to actually sort out what I wish I’d said while we were still there. If I’d been in the drivers seat just then, I would have made a point of pulling over and giving those people all the cash I had while looking her dead in the eyes. My grandma is a very sweet and caring woman and I HATE that she’s been so poisoned by the republican media because sometimes the most VILE shit comes out of her mouth with zero warning.

“There’s an atheist and a christian in this car,” I wish I had said, “And if somebody asked us ‘should you help the homeless’ only the ATHEIST would respond ‘yes, always!’”

Homeless people aren’t your fucking enemy, they’re not trying to take advantage of you, they just want to fucking live. Do I wonder how many people are pretending to be beggars? No! I don’t! Because the answer is ZERO! Nobody goes out on the streets in the freezing fucking cold like that unless they have no other options! It’s humiliating, it’s degrading, and 90% of the people who pass by will look at you like you’re trash! And it’s dangerous!

(This doesn’t even tap into the cesspit of trying to find a job in the US right now, and I’m to tired to open that can of worms, but thats a huge issue too.) I’m just. I’m so fucking mad. I’m so tired of the absolute hypocrisy that comes from combining american ultra-conservative capitalism with christian values. I’m tired of christianity in general bc this kind of shit is what it usually turns into in this country. It’s inescapable. It’s draining. It’s vile. I just want people to stay fucking ALIVE, I dont care if some of them are MAYBE faking, I’d rather be taken advantage of 1% of the time than drive away 100% of the time without doing anything to help people who actually do need it. Love your neighbor, yall. It’s cold out there.

[xgryffinwhore]

september nights

request:  i was wondering if you could write another soft bill smut? i don’t really have a specific plot in mind, we’re just really lacking content on tumblr rn :( in some really precarious place where they don’t want to get caught

warnings: soft smut, like i mean very soft.

word count: 2118

before your lips met bill denbrough’s, love was always, to say the least, a conundrum. lets be real for second, boys wasted your time, and you let them. only the cute ones of course. you are a hopeless romantic, drunk off of molly ringwald and john travolta films. you wanted any relationship you had to be just like the movies.

through your heart breaks, your best friends stood by you, your losers. eddie, richie, bev, stan, ben, and bill. for each tear you shed a punch was thrown to the man who caused it, they were protective over you. bill the most though, he always got so defensive when you were in the mix. all throughout middle & high school, bill has had to deal with every guy who even dares to think about breaking your heart.

“its not fair bill” you wailed into your pillow. he stroked your back and hushed you, his eyes welling with tears. “im never fucking good enough for any guy and its so fucking sad!” your complaints being cut off mid sentence by a choked out cry. “y-y/n. all of y-your boyfriend are i-idiots. anyone w-who would d-d-do this to you isnt w-worth your t-time. anyone w-would be the luckiest in the w-world to have y-you in their life” you picked your head up and looked at him with swollen lips and blood shot eyes “there no one out there for me bill, no one.” 

he bit his lip, fighting back any tears dripping from his eyes “they j-just dont see how p-pretty you are. how g-gentle and caring and s-s-sweet, and h-how your face c-can light up any room. theyre f-fucking idiots, and you d-deserve m-more.” you clearly thought he was being nice, because you could take a MOTHER FUCKING GOD DAMN hint, so you replied “i wish there was someone out there like you, for me, that thinks of me the way you do.” 

he furrowed his brows, tossing his head back and running his fingers furiously through his hair. “d-dammit y/n!” he cursed “cant you s-see what ive b-been trying to say? w-w-what ive been t-trying to say f-for the last f-five years!?!” your expression was bewildered, your brain was going a mile a minute trying to figure out what he meant. his frustration got the best of him, he got up and stormed out the door,  feeling embarrassed and stupid for trying to make you understand how he felt.

he was half way out your front door, fuming for his keys lodged deep into his front pocket; when suddenly:

“bill!”

his head turned at the call of his name, “y-y/n please i d-”

smack.

your lips locked with his, he rain pouring heavily outside. bills lips stilled at the contact, but this lasted briefly, he deepened this kiss by pulling you in to his abdomen by your mid back. your bunched the front of his base ball t shirt with your fists, and he did the same but with your hair.

the rest is basically history.

now six months later, and you couldnt have been happier. bill knew how to treat you, nights out twice a week (you always wanted to pay but bill insisted,) holding your hand to and from classes, he let you borrow have his varsity baseball jacket, which smelt just like him and was a little too big for you. 

when he would drop you off and your classes, he would always grab your hand and transfer a tiny piece of paper into your palm. when you got into class to unfold it, it was always a cute little message about his love for you. 

bill had it bad for you, everyone knew that, and you loved every minute of it. he met every and any standard you had, and exceeded your expectations. 

it was september, still warm enough in derry to wear shorts, so you and your friends thought of a last hurrah for the ending of the summery weather.

“camp out, its nearly perfect” Richie exclaimed. eddie rolled his eyes “like youve ever been near anything perfect toizer, do you even know what perfect means?” richie shoved eddie “yeah eddie i actually have. have you seen amanda’s tits?”

 you tuned out richie and eddies bickering as you’re boyfriend cleared his throat. “you g-gonna go?” he said into your ear, “only if you promise to wear bug spray bill, you know how bad-” he cut you off with a kiss, his mouth forming a small smile at how cute you were. “get a room, honestly” stan poked, pda wasn’t his favorite... “at least i h-have something to k-kiss aye s-stannie”

you arrived at the edge of the forest, parking your car at the last parking ish space. you walked toward the sounds of ben and richie fighting, and came to see that richie really went all out. three tents, sticks for a fire, and more snacks than anyone needed. 

you all spent the remanence of the daylight dancing in the light sky, sharing stories, and eating waaaay too many chips. it was dark now, you all huddled in a circle near the fire; making small talk and trying not to admit you were all very tired.

“ok folks, im off to bed” richie yawned “me stan eddie n’ mike will take the green tent, bev and ben in the red.” richie paused and smirked over at you and bill, you were tangled in his limbs, golfed in his navy blue pull over. “and uh- heh- billy boy and y/n in the yellow tent eh?” you could practically feel bills eye roll, god richie was so immature.

“w-we dont have to s-sleep in the s-s-same tent, i c-can ask ben if he’d s-switch” you look up at bill and reassure him “bill no- its not a big deal, right?” he tucks your hair behind your ear and kisses the side of your temple “c-course not.”

you both went into the tent, bill began to unroll the blankets you both had packed tightly into your bags. You both set up your makeshift bed, bill leaned against a pile of pillows while you hugged his side, your face buried in his neck. his smell was absolutely intoxicating; his skin had remanence of his milk and honey body wash, but it was slightly overpowered by wintergreen, clove, and his bourbon cologne. 

you were like this for around an hour, the orange crank-powered lantern being the only source of light. you switch positions though, you now laid your head on his lap, reading a magazine you stole from the hair salon. he watched your eyes scan every letter, when you read something funny you’d huff to yourself, and when something was intresting you stuck your tongue out from between your teeth. he adored you.

“d-dont stay up t-too late” he stroked your hair off your shoulder “we have t-to have you w-well r-r-rested.” you sat up from beside him, as he adjusted the pillows and took off his pull over, then his pants. he got under the covers and waited for you.

“nice donut boxers” you laughed. “s-shut up” he blushed and regreted not changing them when he had the chance. you turned around took off your shirt, you were shy about how you looked, but it was just bill. it was just bill. you heard his breath hitch, his eagerness radiating off his body onto yours. the air became tense as you unzipped your pants and threw them to the corner. you turned around, bills pupils growing until you were completely facing him.

“yeah i know. mine are boring” you laugh nervously, brushing your hair behind your ear and getting under the covers next to him. he didnt respond, he couldnt take his eyes off of you.you began to sit up again “i can go put back on-” “n-no!” he interrupts, his blush taking up his entire face.

“i j-j-just cant b-believe i g-get to see something s-so special” he gulped “s-so b-b-b-beautiful.”

you grabbed him by his shoulders and kissed him, hard. youve been with boys before, i mean youve dated plenty of people. but no one ever called your body special. hot, yeah. nice, yeah. beautiful, sure. but no one ever thought that it was special. 

bill was a kind boy, the most you two have ever done is get each other off with your hands, always clothed. bill never asked to see more, he felt lucky enough just to make you feel good, and that was enough for him. so when you felt the heat of his hands hovering over your body but not touching it, you new you’d have to call the shots tonight.

“bill,” you laid down “just touch me everywhere, please.” he crawled in between your legs, kneeling so that he could lean over your face “m-my pleasure.”

he traced your collar, leaving small, delicate, kisses to make up for what his fingers left behind as they trailed. he kissed the valley between your breasts, licking slow striped down your skin. he picked up your upper back a little and cocked his head to the side, you nodded and he unclipped your bra. he sat their with his mouth open, taking in the view. you blushed and muttered “hey, keep that mouth to good use.” he dipped down and sucked on your nipples, his mouth felt so good against your skin grazed with goosebumps. he was gingerly with his tongue, it was sexy, it was romantic. he kissed down your stomach, his fingers sweeping down your sides. you could see his member pressing against his boxers, the pressure made him wince every once in a while. his fingers met your panties and he hooked them. again, he looked up for permission, you nodded once again. 

he brought your underwear down your legs and off, looking back to see what he had relieved. he licked his lips, getting ready to please you more than he already did. but you felt bad, bill always gave gave and gave. “its ok, im ready right now.” bill looked up at you in shock, he wasnt expecting you’d want to go all the way. “y/n, y-youre sure?” you lean up and kiss his lips, swiping your tongue against his bottom lip “please.”

he pulled down his boxers eagerly, his member sprung out to hit his stomach. he lined up with you, checking once more that it was ok. then he pushed in, bottoming out. he felt bigger than you thought, of course he was well endowed, but he filled you up so well. you mewled, the pain and pleasure making a delicious feeling that made your toes curl.

he waited, but began slowly moving after a bit. he grunted, feeling you wrapped around him was something he’d never be able to get out of his head he thought to himself. he grunted “f-fuck this feels g-good’ he grunted, his breath becoming heavy and full of lust. with every stroke, you felt yourself get more and more lost in the bliss he made you feel. “youre making me feel so good  bill” you moan, the sound of his name coming out of your mouth driving him absolutely crazy. he speeds up, loving the view of your face contorting in pleasure and your body moving with his. 

he couldnt help but feel admiration to you, your hair formed a halo around your head, and the sweat that coated your skin made you glisten in the orange light. “im t-the luckiest in the world” he husks, holding your cheek. 

you felt the knot in your core coming undone, “bill im close” you strain, trying not to be too loud so you dont wake your friends. he moved your leg up to his shoulder, hitting you from a different, deeper angle. his fingers went to your clit, making you bite your had to stop you from screaming. “you l-look so p-pretty y/n, t-taking me s-so well. making y-you feel so good.” “so good bill” you repeat, drunken off his cock and fingers. 

without warning, you came came, your legs spazzing as you moaned “fuck bill” he followed, his hips stuttering, as he cried out into your shoulder. he pulled out and laid next to you, both of you breathing heavily and coming off your highs. 

“y/n” he looked at you “t-that was really j-just wow- thank y-you.” you kissed him, chaste and sweet “that was great yeah?” “it w-was perfect babe. t-thank you f-for t-that. i love you y-y/n.”

“i love you too bill.”

he sat up, his fingers dancing on your inner thigh.

“y/n?”

“yeah?”

“c-can we p-please do t-that again?”

[cartoonemotion]

after a million years plus an addition million years post the show ending i am finally just now scribbling out my takes and stuff on fethry's immediate family a la how they would fit into dt17 canon

the breakdown in my mind is that all 3 of eider and lulubelle's children are Strange and Ambiguously Disordered (fethry taking the most after his mother) and also to some degree have inherited eider's legendary strength (abner being basically on par with his father and fethry as the baby and the runt of the three being much more close to just having normal person strength, though still a bit surprising for how noodly he is)

more specific points abt the family under the cut bc i dont want the post to be too long @_@

abner

definitely autistic (as 3 and also lulu are) but its like in that. i dont have healthy coping mechanisms to deal with how alienated from ppl i feel so im just gonna fish and carve wood and if anyone enters my space i will burn it down with both of us still inside it. way

that being said abner’s still plenty capable of being a compassionate guy deep down. he cares a lot about his family and takes whatever responsibility u entrust him with extremely seriously

comes off as emotionally stunted bc he doesnt really show affection in the “normal” way, including and especially physical affection and also. saying shit  out loud. he has his own love language its called * noncommittal groan of acceptance as you enter his house *

in my brain i know he should have a job but all i can think about is him fucking off in the woods so he doesnt have to talk with people. maybe one of those people who sit in towers all day to make sure forests dont burn down. i dunno

mary

loves acting and wants to be a professional stage/screen actor so bad but is unfortunately terrible at acting. probably been in like a few commercials or something

very very dramatic, im talking full comedy sketch of a julliard actor levels of melodrama and stage fainting, whether onstage or not. this makes it hard to tell if her reactions to things are genuine or not unless u are her brothers or parents who have been dealing with this forever

since the acting career is not really taking off Yet she has maybe ripped off 1 or 2 or 20 or so people maybe more just to keep the lights on. ironically when shes conning people she can actually act convincingly (my leverage fans out there. you know)

some of you will probably ask about dugan and while i do absolutely love dugan personally in my mind marys not ready nor interested in motherhood. so. maybe some day i will reveal my own dt17 dugan origin concept idk

eider

something of a local folk hero due to both his truly legendary strength and his equally strong inclination to lend his neighbors a hand, or really anyone else who may need a little help for that matter

as exceptionally goofy and loving as you could want any dad to be, though he can also be a bit stern when he needs to be, and a little prideful

in my mind i think it would be very cool if he had moved his family into granny elvira’s farm to give her a hand bc while shes a tough old woman everyone still needs a hand from time to time but i dont know if this contradicts any serious duck lore so forgive me

lulubelle

full loon baby ! none of this “looks like every other member of clan mcduck” shit !!! yes this includes the blood red eyes #epicloonwin

many make the mistake to count her as an absent minded spooky insane woman but this could not be further from the truth. she is very sharp-witted, observant, and is only spooky simply because its pretty near impossible to creep or gross her out, and even harder to full-on scare. and also because she makes long uninterrupted eye contact all the time

fethry definitely inherited a lot from her, but one of the main things they share is the tendency to cycle through all kinds of seemingly unrelated hobbies and interests; but much like fethry’s chief passion seems to be marine biology, lulu greatly enjoys botany and all it’s practical applications, as well as music

[faorism]

as previously mentioned, eventually, hardison won’t be the only one doing his new line of work; he’ll train them up. he'll have a small but dedicated team of chaotic good geniuses. he names them tikkun, meaning "to repair," referencing tikkun olam, "the obligation to repair the world around you" (as brilliantly suggested & defined by @piratedykes).

he is doing his george clooney satellite monitoring and the group has a reputation because boy do NGOs and nonprofits and activists and community organizers like to fucking gossip about shit especially when it goes right?? or rather, one person in one org's fundraising team will reach out to their counterpart in another org and be like...... yo you were frantic last week about [challenge] and how you have to raise like a bajilliion dollars in emergency funds and also ideally take down a warlord but you will settle for money for water and first aid, and i havent heard from you but.... your org's twitter is like, popping right now and it looks like [challenge] has evaporated?? how??? are you okay the hell.

and second fundraising officer is like...... it.......... is good. its been the weirdest wildest week but its good.

and the first officer is like............. no wtf do not leave me like this. how did you do it.

lets say consultants.

consultants?

listen. can't say more. but if everything ever really really goes to shit, and i do mean really, just... consider applying for the rapid response flexible spending grant from the tikkun fund (NOT the tikkun olam foundation, different folx). lets just say that $850 from tikkun goes a long long way.

and the first officer looks it up, and the fund has a boring but efficient website. the fund is barely three years old but they have a small but mighty giving portfolio of tiny tiny orgs like their own, and when this first officer rubén follows through and delves deep into the orgs...... they notice..... wow these folks really had....... a suspicious amount of good luck swing their way at very critical moments.

rubén sits back and is like. huh. okay. weird. but they trust their friend and they keep the tikkun fund in the back of their mind. and one day, yup, theres a fucking crisis and god, god [their community] needs money and the situation is not a blip on anyone's radar outside [their community] but this matters too! and rubén remembers that little fund and yeah, $850 can't fix it next to nothing but that's $850 they desperately desperately need. and luckily the application is super short and rubén gets the vibes their reporting requirements are gonna be super quick and easy as well. so they submit it and then they go and turn around to shake money from somewhere anywhere and.... by the end of the business day, they are wrapping up because they've already worked three hours late and they havent eaten since lunch aka an old granola bar in the back of their file cabinet, and....... what. is that........... yeah. their tikkun fund application has been accepted with clear instructions about how they can proceed to get payment. and rubén wants to cry god god okay.

and rubén sends a quick email to this alec hardison (he/him/mr. but please alec is fine) thanking him profusely and so earnestly, cc'ing wyn the org's executive director. rubén goes home and Do Not Disturb's their work stuff and is ready to start it all over the next day.... but. when they get to the office, they find out wyn has organized an emergency meeting looking... confused and hopeful and so wildly excited. there's a guy next to her dressed smart, but what really stands out with his eyes: they are kind and welcoming but there's a coy twinkle in them like he's got a secret he's itching to share.

and wyn is like. hey so. this is alec hardison and blah blah introduction stuff. (and rubén is like omgggg internally) we spoke last night, and mr hardison's agreed to come on pro bono with his team to assist us and... okay. okay imma be real here for a moment. there's some stuff that's gonna be on the down low here on out and if you don't want part of it, you can take leave for the next week or two we will give you space, but... we know what will happen if shit continues and im not standing for it. i hope you will join me, but you won't be forced. and she turns to please-just-alec who thanks her and turns to the exhausted team and says:

in the jewish faith, we got this concept. tikkun olam, meaning our obligation to repair our world. it takes heroic and wise eyes to see what's wrong around us, and to follow that urge is what we must do as people sharing this planet we call home. and listen, i didn't know about y'all before yesterday, but i can see just how much you've been putting in day in and out for your community. you're the good guys. and when you're doing all that good against so much bad, sometimes, sometimes it feels like you ain't got no one in your corner. but i hope together, with the support of my tikkun crew, we can repair what has been hurt and damaged. and yall, and here, alec lets that secret out in a smile, i cannot wait to fuck some shit up alongside you.

[ewritesthangs]

Q AND A TIME

Q and A time. Questions. And answers. Always a fun time especially with Corpse. Should be easy right? Ha! You guys veer off track more times than you can count!

"Hey guys. Y/N and Corpse here!"

"Whaddup babies." The sugar sweet sound of his raspy, gravely voice captures the hearts of many women and men. Including yours.

"That does things to me."

"Like?"

"Malfunction."

"You're functioning fine."

"I've learned to hide it well."

"Anyway, we are answering your most desirable questions. Thank you so much for participating and asking those questions. They're all great. Some were a bit weird."

"Like really guys? Toe fungus? Ew."

"Stay on topic babe." Corpse places a hand on your shoulder for emphasis.

"Okay first question. How did you and Y/N meet? We went to school together and lived next to each other."

"Then they moved. Leaving me all alone."

"I came back. Im here aren't I? Geeze."

"You're all mine now." He presses a loud kiss to your cheek. You blush and giggle, patting his cheek as he kisses you.

"My honey."

"How are you guys coping with the pandemic? Oh we are doing okay. Some days are harder than others."

"One time, Corpse was so sad, he wouldn't get out of bed. So I compromised and snuggled with him. Giving him kisses, love, attention. All the things he was craving apparently because about 2 hours later he got up and we went outside."

"She is so incredible. I can't even begin to explain my love and affection for her."

"You're such a sap. Its so sickenly sweet. Gross."

"You love it."

"I plead the fifth on that one."

"Okay next question!"

"Do you inspire each other? Deep. Yes we do. I hope I inspire Cor. He inspires me a lot. To be a better person."

"Now who is the sap?"

"Sappy questions deserve sappy reponses." You retort. Corpse just snickers.

"What is your greatest achievement together or apart? Well one of mine is blowing utogether. In such a small amount of time. Together? Hitting 3 years together."

"Holy shit its been that long?"

"Time flies baby."

"True shit right there."

"And I wouldn't-"

"Dont you dare."

"Have it any other way."

"You did it. Dammit Corpse. Sappyness."

"Sappy questions deserve sappy responses." He mocks with a smirk.

"You-you just used my line against me?"

"You do it to me all the time."

"Fair point."

You guys continue on, taking some live questions as well.

"How have you, Y/N, coped with Corpses medical issues? I stand right beside him, make sure he does his diet correctly and support him. If a flare-up happens we do immediate action. When he does to get his throat looked at, im holding his hand in the waiting room and waiting for him when he gets out. I listen to the doctors intently so I can be well informed."

"She seriously is the best. I can't even begin to describe the gratitude I have for her being there every little step of the way."

"Anything for the man I love." You two kiss, a cute sweet kiss to each others lips.

"I love you too."

"Oh thank God. I thought you kept me around cause I cleaned so well."

"That too."

"I knew it." You whisper loud enough for everyone to hear. Corpse pats your head.

"One more question."

"When are you guys getting married? Eventually. We hopefully will."

"Wellllllllllllll. I was going to wait until our anniversary."

"Wait what?"

"Get married on our anniversary. So I don't have to remember more dates."

"Lazy ass giving me a heart attack."

"You said the same thing when we talked about it."

"Thats besides the point here Cor."

"Well thats it for now folks! Thank you so much for following and supporting me and Y/N. We love you and can't wait to update you in a few months."

"Bye guys! Love yourself and then love others! We love you!" Corpse turns the livestream off and sighs heavily, tired from all the talking and laughing. "Wanna head to bed baby?"

"I want to do something first."

"As in?"

"Come with me." He gets up and takes your hand. You follow him to the balcony. The moon and a few stars were shining in the sunset.

"Wow. What beauty."

"I was hoping for the perfect sunset moment to do this."

"Do what? Oh my god." Corpse was getting down on one knee. A ring box in his hand. Unopened. He opens it, and you see a beautiful ring of your favorite metal and your birthstone. You audibly gasp. Tears flowing freely down your cheeks. Your hand was covering your mouth that was ajar.

"I love you more than life itself. You give me hope. You love me and support me and I want nothing more than for you to be my wife. Will you, Y/N Y/M/N, marry me?"

"Oh my God, YES CORPSE!" you can't contain your excitement for you just got engaged! You were jittery with love and happiness. His lips curl into a smile as he slips the ring onto your finger. He stands up and pulls you into his embrace before kissing you deeply, so deeply it almost knocks you out. Butterflies and stars dance around your head. You truly loved this man with all your heart. And now you're marrying him.

"You just made me the happiest man in the world."

"You're telling me. Oh my God were getting married!" You grab his face and peck his lips again. "Holy shit. How did you?"

"I crafted it online while you were away for that week." He smirked.

"You never seize to amaze me."

"Wait until you see where our honeymoon is gonna be."

"What!? Where?!"

"Tune in next year for when we get married. You'll find out after the wedding."

"I hate the suspense."

"I love you."

"I love you more."

"Forever."

"And ever."

[ieatdeadstars]

of all my years on tumblr, never has my art gotten attention TvT

ANYWAYS

i have once again made myself paranoid for the week sooo

WALTEN FILES THEORY

the narrative of the story is “ding dong, sophie, your folks is dead” right? but it’s forgiving towards felix. i say that mainly because of the line “he is so sorry for what he did to them, but there is nothing he can do, remember that.” in Lucky You. Guess who’s in that video, not as an animatronic, but as a little drawing?

(yall its storming again if these lights go out while im writing this-)

we can take from the subtitles in the Bunny Farm mistranslating molly’s comfort toward felix turnin to “it’s all your fault” that felix does feel guilty. martin also liked the comment below, confirming my belief. of course he does, though. i think he is good deep down, he’s maybe scared of disappointing folks, maybe he doesnt like when people are mad at him. i personally will lie if i think ill get yelled at so-and no i dont kin felix kranken. just so you know.

anyways. felix obviously, at least at one point, felt guilty for all that he’s done. but like evan hansen, hes too deep to see the light. so then bunny farm happens. now as far as im aware- let me check the wiki- yeah he’s still living- but that works. you know why? showbear isn’t an animatronic. hes always been drawn, either in a cutout, game, or animation.

okay ken, so showbear might not be an animatronic, so felix is alive and feeling worse than bo burnham? so what?

well, though jack and showbear favor a bit, i think i can say that jack isnt showbear. will i be later making a theory saying he is? yeah but it wont be as thought out as this. felix designing showbear to fit jack’s face in order to talk to sophie makes muuuch more sense to me. i mean, how else would the web be so complex if felix wasnt the spider? jack doesn’t know what they were saying moments before the crash. jack, more than likely, didnt kmow the details of linda leaving felix, thus giving felix some sort of branch of an excuse. jack couldnt tell you where they were buried. but you know who could? felix. it’s so obvious that i might be wrong.

ive also noted that in bunny farm’s credits, felix doesnt get a voice actor- and he most definitely talked. every other character, im sure, got a va. so why didnt felix? or is it…his va was already mentioned for another character? no, ken, that cant be it. two characters were voiced by martin, martin was mentioned both times. well, i refuse to believe that was an honest mistake. because in guilty, he doesn’t get a va.

also i just realized the facility is built on top of ed and molly- foul for that one martin.

anyways, to wrap this up. felix feels guilty about what he’s done to the waltens. i mean, them and the restaurant were all he had left. so he uses showbear to gently narrate the story of what happened to her forgotten family to sophie.

what do i think, following this theory, would happen next? well i think if sophie can reach felix, shell confront him. i think she may also stop taking her pills, or take more. that depends on why she takes them in the first place. maybe jenny will die. maybe felix will finally own up to what he’s done. maybe hell gaslight her, using her pills which leads her to abandoning them. who knows? other than martin and his associates.

maybe he’s using showbear to make her remember so shell investigate, die, and he can be sure all the loose end are taken care of.

thats all for today. im gonna go play minecraft lol

[enderspawn]

Quick question, I been in the fandom for a long ass time (since the first sadist animatic since I was a fan of sadist since their Batim days) so I think I good grasp on all of the folk in the smp but uh.... I kinda realised that I have no clue why c!Niki hates c! Wilbur and even more so, why does everyone thinks she's a girlboss for it??? Did I miss an entire plotline orrrr?

(sent this to a couple of other folk, hope you don't mind)

admittedly, im not the best well versed in it either (i'd recc going to mia geoguessbur, whos tbh the expert on c!wilbur and c!niki imo) but the short of it is: he realized the anger she had previously associated with tommy (because he "ruined everything", also see her attempted murder) was wrongly placed. he didn't do anything! ....and then she shifted the blame and that anger to wilbur instead of her like... dealing with her emotions. oops!

as for the girlboss thing... i think depending from person to person WHY they do it varies.

part of it is a willful ignorance of c!niki's character and her arc and instead working to fit her to a trope, i'm sure of it. likewise (though a bit cynical), i feel like a lot of people dont follow the female characters/ccs but dont want to LOOK like they dont so they... kind of fake it til they make it kind of thing? using the girlboss method is a great and easy way to show support for a character without having to actually care nor show any amount of depth in investment in who that character actually IS or going through. Again, thats a cynical view though and absolutely not the only reason ppl "girlboss-ify" characters.

some of it is encouraging bad decisions in the same way ppl chanted for wilbur to blow up lmanberg-- yeah its not healthy, but its fun and dramatic so im gonna be positive about it! go off!

some of it also (at least for me so im counting it) is like.... its more complex than you can get into comfortably (or at least casually). theres nuance and morals and what they're doing isn't right but its not a simple choice either. so you just... say girlboss instead and move on? again its also tied to the second point where you're encouraging bad actions, but with this point as compared the other like... intent that it IS deeper than that, its more tragic. you're glossing over it for the sake of levity, if that makes sense? Its a tragedy and you like it. (admittedly tho, i've used this type of "girlbossing" the most with like... c!quackity and the prison arc bc i was too tired to debate morals FJDSKLFJ)

its important tho to keep in mind the difference in how ppl treat male vs female characters with the "girlboss-ification" no matter what though. are you treating all female characters the same and glossing over their depth or erasing their character to fit a typical "strong girl" or "boss girl" archetype? also ties back to the first point, is your support superficial to make yourself look good?

theres definitely a trend in fandom i think to ignore the depth with female characters and their actions/motives while digging in deep to the male characters. men are allowed to be a tragedy while women are ''empowered'' by their tragedy. as an example off top my head: the eggpire. ive seen multiple points talking about the underlying tragedy of members like bad or ant and how they got to that point, but most ive seen about hannah are just... "yeah shes evil now #girlboss".

this isnt to say that you SHOULDNT acknowledge the depth of those male characters, nor to try and like.. single out eggpire fans, its just the clearest example i can think of. multiple characters going thru the same/similar scenarios, but the reception to them is different

despite all the of above, i dont think "girlboss-ifying" a character is inherently a bad thing. At least when used responsibly, like the second or third option presented. it IS a fun shorthand for "thing character is being active and doing things i like", often with a unsaid message of "this character is doing BAD things that i like". i dont think it should be tossed aside or never used, just used mindfully. again: why are you treating this character like this? how much do you actually know about the situation? etc.

[hufflautia]

Where it all started [Part 1]

Chapter 1 

Sometimes links don’t appear on posts. if you can’t see the link to “Chapter 1”, my masterlist is pinned to the top of my blog, and you can find it there.

Summary: Slytherin’s parents have another argument, but at this point, no one’s surprised. After all, they’re her parents. It would be abnormal if they didn’t argue. However, this one’s a biggie. The fight ends with the slam of a door and her dad packing his bags into the car and getting ready to leave. Desperate for him to come back, Slytherin’s mom forces her to go to him with a message that will surely make him stay. Buckle up folks, for this is where it all began. 

Slytherin stood on the sidewalk as she watched her dad pack up his things into the van. 

She dug her fingernails into her arm, her heart stinging with ache as her dad turned around with a smile on his face, a failed attempt to reassure her that it was going to be ok. It was all gonna be ok. After all, this was normal, right? It’s not like it was unusual that her dad was leaving again to go back to Florida, where the homewrecker waited for him, her outstretched hands eagerly opened up to him and his credit card. 

However, this was the first time he left abruptly. A spike of sorrow stabbed at Slytherin’s heart as she thought back to the sound of her parents’ door abruptly opening; soon after, she could hear angry stomps that quickly descended down the steps of the staircase. 

She could almost hear the hiss in her ear as she stood in the archway of the living room, watching her dad leave in the far distance. “Tell him that Ravenclaw’s crying,” her mother spat, pushing her towards the front door. “Quickly, before he leaves!” 

Slytherin internally sighed. How typical. Instead of resolving their relationship issues by going to couples therapy, her mom decided to throw all those burdens onto her daughter, who had already grown tragically used to being used as her puppet. 

She decided not to argue against going after her dad and trying to guilt-trip him into staying home as her mom wanted. Otherwise, she would be lectured on how she’s selfish and wouldn’t do this small thing for her mom, how she’s basically ruining this family by letting her dad leave, how family is so fucking important and manipulating her dad into staying would be vital to their happiness as a whole, how family this and family that. 

You get the point. Slytherin certainly did. That’s why she was currently standing awkwardly behind her dad, staring at his back as he lifted boxes into his car. 

“Um, Raven…” She paused. Her throat felt dry and tight. Swallowing with difficulty, she tried again. “Ravenclaw’s crying.” 

It wasn’t the crying itself that mattered. That wasn’t the main reason why her mom rushed her out the door to deliver the message to her dad. It was simply the fact that it was Ravenclaw who was crying. Let’s just say that he and his dad had a complicated relationship. 

Things were never the same between them after Ravenclaw sent an angry message to him via text when he was in Florida a year ago. The contents of the message reeked of disdain for his constant infidelity. When his mom found out, she shoved the phone into Slytherin’s face in the dead of night and asked if she knew about this. The glaring light from the screen nearly blinded her. 

Slytherin read the text messages through squinted eyes and could make out a few curse words here and there. Though she was slightly disoriented from the sudden ambush of information, it was clear to her that her brother resented their dad for what he did.  

That made Ravenclaw’s anguish even more useful in their mom’s opinion. Seeing the tears streak down his face when he heard that his dad was leaving again, she had a glorious idea. Perhaps if her husband knew of their son’s sorrow, he would reconsider his abrupt departure. After all, it was Ravenclaw who was crying. 

If it were Hufflepuff, that would be understandable—she can get quite emotional sometimes. But it was Ravenclaw, who was usually guarded and distant. One might suggest that he was secretly broken inside. But that’s not the point, at least not in his mom’s opinion. The main thing she was concerned about was that she could use his misery to her advantage! Maybe if her husband knew of his sadness, he would feel guilty enough to stay behind. After all, if his son, who despised him, was upset over his departure, perhaps it wouldn’t be so bad to stay home and endure his wife’s temper for a little while longer. 

Slytherin’s words did produce somewhat of a reaction. Her dad didn’t turn around for a while, but when he did, his eyes were slightly red and puffy. It was evident that he was trying to hold back his tears. One might think that this means that he’ll stay. He seemed distraught over the news that his son was crying because of his leave. Surely, he’ll stay, right? 

It wasn’t enough. Nothing ever seems to be enough.

“I’ll be back soon, okay?” He hugged her briefly and gave a light squeeze as a sign of reassurance. As a silent message that it was going to be ok. Even though everything was most definitely not okay. A thousand hugs and gestures of reassurance wouldn’t change this. 

Slytherin didn’t react angrily to his refusal, the unspoken declaration of No, I will not go back home. In fact, it seemed as if she didn’t react at all. However, if one were paying close attention, they would notice the sparkle in her eyes dim. But maybe there wasn’t a sparkle to begin with. She had been enduring this shit for so long that she forgot what it was like to be normal, to feel like the white kid you see in commercials, the one who seemed to radiate mirth, a type of energy that said, I don’t have a care in the world because life is so fucking great and I can’t stop smiling. She didn’t even bother to smile, a common facial expression when one is in a difficult situation and tries to diffuse the somber atmosphere by slapping a facade on their face, the corners of their lips upturned to form a grimace that resembles some sort of a smile—a twisted kind of smile, that’s for sure. Why should she pretend that everything was okay when it wasn’t? Instead, she merely nodded in response. 

When her dad pulled away to pack the last box into the trunk, she took a deep breath to diminish the familiar sense of abandonment that flooded her senses, to clear the warning signs that flashed in her mind. He’s leaving! Your dad is leaving! He’s abandoning you again. You’re apparently not important enough for him to stay. 

She stared at the ground, only looking up when she heard the sound of a car door slamming shut. The resounding click was all it took for the waterfalls to finally pour from her eyes, for it was at this moment when she realized that this was actually happening. This was no dream—it was reality. Her sad, devastating reality. Tears blurred her vision as she watched the car drive away, leaving her in the dust. 

Slytherin gasped in erratic breaths between her broken sobs as her eyes hung onto the tiny speck that resembled her dad who was driving 

away, 

away, 

and a-w-a-y.

Through the jumble of thoughts that clashed in her head, one thing was clear. Her dad was her dad, but only sometimes. 

Tears streaking down her face, she tried to soothe her pain with the belief that he would be back soon. If only she had known that it would be a while before he returned. If only he hadn’t left. Perhaps things would’ve been different for her if he stayed, for this was where it started. 

This marked the beginning of it all.   

Comments and reblogs are a writer’s gold!

MASTERLIST ; sometimes links don’t appear on posts. if you can’t see the link to “MASTERLIST”, the masterlist itself is pinned to the top of my blog. check it out if you haven’t already! 

Author’s note: HI! Were you surprised to see that I posted two fics in a row?? I hope you enjoyed this. Most of it was unfortunately based on what happened to me a year or two ago. I based Ravenclaw on my brother, who did actually cry when my dad was leaving after an argument, and yes, my wack mother did force me to run after my dad to tell him. One of the few differences is that I’m not a drug addict and I’m fine now so dont worry. 

Idk how I feel about this series, it is a lot darker from what I usually write. I know I’m gonna have to write more for creative writing class, so maybe i will continue it. I will try to think of how to turn these fics into something more positive, because this stuff is very heavy and depressing. however, that will be a little difficult because the plot itself is naturally drab. however, i will try to think of a happy ending for Faye/Slytherin. 

Shall we look at some wholesome pictures? 

lmaoaoa i pasted this picture from the internet and tumblr glitched and pushed the pic all the way to the top. imagine seeing this dog at the beginning of the fic, that would be funny :’) 

AWWWWWW I THINK THIS MIGHT BE MY FAVORITE

ok hold up i just realized that is probably a stuffed animal 😐 this is so embarassing lmaoaoa when i saw it i was like THAT IS SO FRICKIN CUTE

OK WAIT WTF NOW I THINK ITS AN ACTUAL DOG??? CAN SOMEONE HELP AND TELL ME IF ITS REAL OR NOT?!! at first, i thought it was real, but then i looked at the paws and it looked kinda fake and i was like this dog is too fluffy and wholesome to be real. BUT THEN I LOOKED AGAIN and i think the owners just put the pooh outfit over the dog?? what is going on with my brain.. but at the same time, its 2 am for me rn so maybe i should get some sleep BUT FIRST, LETS LOOK AT MORE DOGS <3 (lmaoaoa i feel like my friend would say “gosh ur such a hufflepuff” (menna im talking about u lmao omg hey gorl)) 

After seeing this gryffindor pup, i immediately searched up “dog costumes hufflepuff” lmaoooooo

OK THATS ENOUGH DOGS FOR NOW. Part 2 is coming soon. I already have it ready but I might not post it right away. 

That’s all for now. Be sure to let me know what you think. TOODELOOO!

TAGS:  @slytherpuff-shenanigans @lokijiro @xxkitsurikaxx @sara-is-boredd @skylee-skz   @determinedpines @draco22malfoy @pancakes-and-sugar  @casteel08 @indigosimon1998 @tell-that-to-my-feather @the-ugly-duck0 @prettyblueskylark  @okiguessimawitchnow @daisyinmyheart @peachyblue @korra4321 @shoyoockbby  @ravenflowersposts @walkinganomaly @parkerthemarker02 @hummingbird-hufflepuff @bumbblebeeeeee @luciferswife16 @iknow-im-cute @maisen98 @shadowsinger11 @tuonglam03 @fanfic-reblogger @mygc0re @rellasworld @sha3thehunter @croctusjuice @jadefox05 @d0uxs @charleii @kaylenthegreat @hufflepufflepukwudgie3897 @insertlongnamehere @trashpannda @ihate-myname @nowheredreamer @history-geek101 @strawberrypanda99 @nikkijovanic @hannanshi @sirenofthe7seas  @johannamariemst @badass-like-damon  @willow-salix @remmyswritings @x-whatsupdoc-x @dracosvftie @hitchhiker-of-the-galaxy @akerlizzie @thatfann @justanxiousme @another-witch @bucinjisung @elegantcroissantplaidpony @treefroggo @narritydream @hufflpuffles @adreameratdawn @leftpeanutturtleegg @turbulentbluebird5 @geekgirl69 @praiseourlordduck @quakemebacktothe50s @nomad-of-the-realms @stardustzainy  @theblackwolf21 @crakencc @introvertedrae @cryinbisexual @bojelina @cocoqueenstheword @manicpixiedreamtarot @velvetstrawberry @jxmpsuitx @simpering-simpleton @urfaveslytherin @asterinatlas @simpforkpop @pufflehuff929 @morallyambiguoussimp @applekenm @chunwest @oncergleekpotterhead @no1-importan @qiaopao  @dulduldoldul @schlongbottom @vickeyunicorn @peanut-in-the-goal @hufflepuffgirly @flvrqnce @nothingtoseehere812 @maxwellsgang @1d-killed-me @betacaroteno-lanudo @dragon-slayer-fairy1 @thatonebislytherin @dragonsandbread @justanotherperson @sophiexteresa @hmilkwhoney @writertwiddle @questionsbecameourocean @anomiatartle @coldsweetharmony @dont-hyuck @fixstationed @kindawannadietbh @trippy-morgan @xo-angel-ox @fangirlgeekandfreak @evolnura @mossy-axolotl @verylovelystars @boilyourteeth @megand2017 @malfoys-demigod @booksntings @joshirlangford @staymoarmyzen @poojxshxh @hedgepuffgirl @alverniaphi @verifiefangirl-mainblog @purpleskymalfoy @roxy3457 @rayanicaraynbow @jess-harrywars @starrysonic @tonksichu @lauxtbs @tumlbr-trasher @chelseasosa @thebiggestnaturaldisaster @swagangelhorsepickle @princessstoopid @pymmoon @emilyaneliperry @pond-waterr @pandapillow @saraleo95 @astrartss @trentalexanders @theoriginaljohnwatsonsblog @nevilletheplantboi @just--another--hufflepuff @yoongifiess @ajdqueen @annie-mcl @coloring-bud @majorfangirl37 @eatacrackerandstop @weasleytwinswheezes @imscaredofhorses @dontmindmeimjustabox @glitterykidlightmug @multi-fandom-nutjob @littleemotionalpanda @thewitcheswords  @blueberry-9-pancakes @worldsbestdilfbecky @qixnsriess @inexperiencedpotathoe @notsowiseravenclaw @captiniminnie @ruinyourface @da-fox-rangerrr @inkedintothepaper  @happy-puff @grandcyclecreation @dawinehouse @catiwisspuff​ @aasa2102​  @mae-25​ @sydthekidd98 @kokichismango @xxavaloraxx​ @iamahufflepuff​ @adoregin​ @sunnniiee @lewispoolerpayton @dumbbitch85​ @bumblebirbs​ @diggorycullen​ @protectorofsk8topia​ @silverhetdanes​ @zuko-28​  @beardedhumanoid​ @arianatorpotterhead​ @shipping-book-keeper​ @marvelenthusiast10​ @i-cannot-do-aesthetics​ @a-huffleing-lesbean​ @kaslec​ @hufflepuffwritess​ @mouthfacereborn​ @kodeinekissss​ @ihavenocontrolofmylifeeither​ @pinqgchuu​ @im-a-solanum-lycopersicum​ @clementines-x​ @stressy-depressy​ @sweetinvisiblewriter​ @absentmindeduniverse​ @asnowpuff​ @theofficialgaybestfriend​ @violayaxley​ @sunshinyyb @colettedelaurel​ @theoriginalsherlockholmesblog​ @i-have-a-bad-feeling​ @jpow345​  @gay-disaster826​ @bloodyxheaven​ @autumnpleaves​ @froggy-failure​ @toomanybandstocare​ @pink1babez​ @untitled-2424​ @sleepdeprivedgurl​  @chaseanders​  @wolfpack-arts-industries99​ @nugnugchick​ @queenofwordsandnerds​ @ganjeolhiddaeng​ @wordy-escapades​ @writtenfoxscreams​ @w0odr0ses​ @coolpetsmcubandit​  @crypticcandi​ @widowsgranger​ @fantasyprincess101​ @wiiltedflowers​ @aestheticworldd​ @miniaturefunnytraveldonkey​ @bucketofdeadroses​ @uwuplsh​ @softedits-exe​ @cel3stialone​ @sofiapeachyy​  @wanderaven92​ @eunnieah​ @marsupialsgotbloodyears​ @eurydicedior​ @neonuzumaki​ @uhhhem​

[roseverdict]

More Than He Seems (Part 7)

one time when i was 12 i woke up in february feeling like shit and my dad made me go to school anyway because he was convinced i was just faking it to avoid going to school. i was tired and running a pretty high fever all day. im not trying to be all like "screw my dad" or anything, but That's Totally Not Relevant Information For This Chapter. :)

warnings: a bit of stan's potty mouth, but not as much as usual due to his pretending to be ford for the whole chapter.

Masterpost!

〜〜〜〜〜〜

The mom-and-pop general store, apparently named "Dusk 2 Dawn," sat in its lot innocently enough, as though it wasn't ridiculously big.

Or, Stan considered, maybe that was just the exhaustion talking.

Stan took a deep breath and pushed open the doors. Ford's groceries weren't gonna get themselves, and no annoyingly-large convenience store was going to get in his way.

It was fairly empty inside, something Stan was grateful for. He may have looked and sounded like Ford, but it'd been so long since their last successful switch, he wasn't really sure he could actually pull it off. If it was just a face he'd made up from looking at a few magazines, he'd have no issues coming up with a fake personality to match it, but now that he had someone to actually copy-!

Then again, considering how the handful of people watched him curiously, as if he was a stranger anyway, maybe he wouldn't have to.

He picked up a basket, strode into the nearest aisle, (the bread aisle, it turned out,) and started checking prices. Ford may have given him his wallet, but Stan knew more than most small-time shop owners gave him credit for in the art of budgeting. He was going to stretch Ford's money to cover as much as possible.

Without stealing.

Because that'd go on Ford's record, not his own, and he really didn't want to ruin that for Ford, too.

…oh boy.

He boxed up those thoughts and slid a few loaves of bread into the basket. Between Ford's avoidance of the town and Stan's usual appetite, they would probably need quite a bit to hold them over until the next time one of them could go grocery shopping.

"You passing through, stranger?" A cheery woman asked, looking up from her own shopping list.

Showtime.

Stan gulped and straightened up, altering his voice, clasping his hands behind the basket the way Ford always had, and trying to look for all the world as though he wasn't just a second-rate double wearing two pairs of pants, three tops, and a trenchcoat. "No, actually. I've lived here for-" shit, had Ford actually mentioned when he'd moved here? "-a while. I'm just not usually one for socializing."

"Oh, have you?" The woman asked, her eyes widening and her mouth turning into an "O" of surprise. "You wouldn't happen to be that spooky science guy that lives in the woods, would you?"

"Well, yes, um…?"

"Susan!"

"…Susan. My name is Stanl-ford. Dr. Stanford Pines." Stan lied. "I was unaware that that was what people thought of me."

"Well, between the lights and the earthquakes, you know how us small-town folks can get." Susan chuckled good-naturedly and lightly swatted his shoulder. "Leave us be and we'll cook up all kinds of stories! Between you and me, though, I've always wondered what you get up to in that cabin of yours."

"Really, now?" Stan asked, his mind racing a mile a minute.

"Yeah! I'd give just about anything to have a look for myself!" Susan smiled widely.

Stan almost tried to see if anyone else in the store would be interested in a ridiculously-expensive tour, but the odd sensation of his extra fingers brought him up short.

Ford wouldn't do that. Frankly, Ford would probably be pissed with him if he brought an entire tour group with him when he got back.

So, instead, Stan coughed awkwardly. "I'll, um, I'll keep that in mind. My work can be quite unpredictable, after all, and I would rather not endanger anyone for a simple tour. I'm actually trying to keep my presence minimal at the moment, but that may change in the future."

There. That sounded smart enough, right?

"Oh, that's understandable." Susan nodded. "Still, can't you talk about it a little bit?"

Stan ran his thumb across Ford's grocery list for a moment.

In his mind's eye, the countless "basic" foods stared up at him, taunting him with their sheer numbers and the fact that he had no idea where to find any of it.

He focused back on Susan and unfolded the paper. "Actually, if you would be so kind as to help me find some of the things on my list, I would greatly appreciate it. I could tell you about-" think, Stan, think, "-my latest endeavor involving, um, unicorn hair."

Surprisingly, Susan simply rolled her eyes and scoffed. "Ugh, unicorns. Well, if you need anybody to make those uppity horse-faces see sense, just give the Corduroy boys a ring, alright? They'll get you all set up. Now, while we go look for your…" she peeked at Stan's list, "…canned soup, why don't you tell me about whatcha need unicorn hair for?"

"Uh. Sure?" Stan blinked, but set off after her when she started heading down to the other end of the aisle. He mulled over how much he could say without acting out of character (or flat-out crazy) for a moment. "I have reason to believe a chaotic entity wishes to break through to our world. He enjoys tricking others into letting him possess them, then using their bodies for his own nefarious purposes. So far, unicorn hair is my best lead to figuring out a way to keep him out of our world for good."

"Ooh, I don't know much about 'chaotic entities,' but if you figure out a way to keep critters out of your garbage cans, could you send some my way?" Susan asked, leading him a few aisles over. "I'm getting real sick and tired of chasing the gnomes away from my windowsills whenever I leave a pie out to cool."

Gnomes were real, too?!

Stan tried not to gape at her, instead repressing a badly-timed shiver. "I'm sure I could whip something up."

Susan beamed, coming to a stop by a shelf of cans. "Could you? That'd be swell!" Then, without waiting for an answer, "Oh, here we are!"

Stan blinked, but started inspecting the cans for the best possible deal. He wound up deciding on the generic store brand's cheaper soups- tomato, chicken noodle, and the like- and stacking several cans in the basket on his arm. "Thanks, Susan. Perhaps next you might show me where to find the breakfast cereals?"

"Huh. Wouldja look at that." Susan remarked instead of answering. "Six fingers."

Stan's blood ran even colder than it had been already.

Half of him wanted to get all up in her face, demanding if she thought something was wrong with that.

The other half was starting to panic. Stan got away with making those demands because he was trying to be protective of his twin, and he hadn't had to since they were kids for…more than a few reasons. Ford would probably…what? Take pride in them? Shy away like he had back in Glass Shard? He didn't know how Ford would react to being confronted about his fingers anymore!

Susan kept talking, thankfully solving Stan's problem before it could even truly start. "Neat! You're definitely gonna fit in around here, Dr. Pines. We've got all kinds of strange and spooky stuff! Why, just last week, I heard from the supernatural grapevine that a shapeshifter showed up in town!"

…Wow. Ford had really hit the jackpot with this-

-hold up.

"A shapeshifter? Really?" Stan asked, doing his best 'surprised Ford' impression. Either she was talking about Stan himself, or "Shifty" must have gotten out of wherever-Ford-left-him, and he needed to know which. "Do tell!"

"Yes, really!" Susan nodded and gestured for him to follow her down the aisle. "But not one of those murderous ones like McGucket sometimes rambles on about. Word on the street is that this shapeshifter's been spotted setting up wards in the woods, wards that're meant to keep bad things out. Now, I may not know why they're here or where they went, but if you come across them, would you mind saying 'hi' to them from the folks of Gravity Falls? Whatever they're running from, the valley likes 'em enough to let 'em stay, and that's gotta count for something!"

There was…a lot…to unpack there, but the gist of it was clear.

Apparently, he'd been given a seal of approval by the very land itself…somehow. Was the sigil on his shoulder a part of it, or was this something completely different?

Whatever the case, Stan most definitely did not freeze in the middle of the aisle, staring at the back of Susan's head with wide eyes.

If he had, however, he would have shaken himself back into the present before Susan could figure out he'd stopped and turn around.

But he didn't, and that was the story he was sticking to.

"I'll, uh," Stan made a show of clearing his throat to cover up the way his Ford Voice had slipped for a moment, "I suppose I'll try to remember that."

"Are you feeling okay?" Susan asked, glancing back at him.

"Oh, uh, yeah, yeah, I'm fine."

Susan raised a disbelieving eyebrow. "If you say so. Here's the cereal, by the way."

Stan gave her an appreciative nod and started putting boxes into his basket. They were heavier than they had any right to be, but he made it work.

His arm shook when he lifted it too high to try and reach one of the boxes, (off-brand Crunchy Caps, Ford's childhood favorite,) but he tried to disguise it with a chuckle. "Heh, thanks again."

They went on like this for a while, with Stan trying to keep himself from seeming tired, and Susan showing him where the various kinds of food were and giving him a crash course in Gravity Falls gossip.

So far, he'd gotten soup, cereal, eggs, milk, orange juice, bread, lunch meat, cheese, headache medicine, and a shitload of ramen.

So far, he'd found out that the Cutebikers had just moved in a few months ago and were just the cutest little family, the Northwests weren't very fond of Ford's constant questions, the gnomes were likely going to swarm in the next few months, and the Durland and Blubs boys had been spotted at the bowling alley and weren't they just the sweetest (but from one weirdo to another, keep it on the down-low please, the town didn't need any big-city types getting it in their heads to try and "fix" them)?

By the time he managed to reach the register, he was exhausted, and not just because of the freezing cold in his muscles.

The man at the register, apparently named "Pa," gave him a knowing nod. "Having a long day?"

"The longest." Stan admitted, rubbing his hands over his forearms without thinking. The store owners should really turn the heat up.

"Oh, a six-fingered man, hm?" The man named Pa (just a coincidence, that was all it was) smiled warmly and started scanning Stan's groceries. "Hope nobody's giving you any trouble over that. If they are, you just send 'em our way, alright?"

"Yeah!" Susan nodded from where she stood behind him in line. "Remember what I said about the unicorns, too!"

"I'll try." Stan chuckled and averted his eyes, catching sight of some jellybeans nearby. He quickly tossed a bag in with the rest of his groceries as another potential peace offering.

Ford really needed to get that demon out of his head and actually meet the townspeople. He'd love it here!

Stan paid and took the bags of food when they were offered to him (when had Not-His-Pa finished ringing him up?) with a smile that he really hoped didn't look as forced as it felt. "Have a good day, then."

"You too, Dr. Pines!" Susan waved to him from where Not-His-Pa was ringing her up.

Not-His-Pa nodded. "And take care of that fever of yours, sonny. I could feel it from across the counter, and you really shouldn't let that get any worse."

Great. Others were picking up on how terrible he felt.

"…duly noted."

Stan swallowed and headed for his car. He glanced at the passenger-side door for a second before shaking his head and just opening the driver's side instead. He sat down and rubbed at his face for a moment, the odd sensation of the extra fingers helping keep him awake, then reached over and set the grocery bags in the passenger side of the car.

Okay.

He just had to make it back to Ford's house without crashing the car or something.

He could do this.

Stan fumbled with his keyring for a moment, but soon got his car key into the ignition. After a moment more, he decided to crank the heat up to the warmest it could go. If he could get at least some of the chill out of his bones by the time he got back, it'd be worth the extra gas.

Halfway there, he turned the heat back off with a shivering hand and a grimace. So much for that.

It was fine.

He was fine.

He gripped the steering wheel tight enough to make his knuckles turn white in an effort to keep his arms from shaking and sending the car skidding off into the snow.

He just had to make it back.

Stan repeated the words in his head like a mantra, nearly missing the turnoff to get to Ford's cabin as he did. He managed to keep traction on the road as he veered onto the path, and he kept traction as he crawled through the woods. At least he could see where he was going this time.

At some point he was definitely going to bug Ford about shoveling the driveway, though.

Blessed warmth rippled through him for the brief second it took to cross the unicorn barrier before fading. He pulled up in front of Ford's house and grabbed the groceries, clinging to them tighter than he probably should have as he slid out of the car and trudged up to the porch. He rapped his knuckles against the door, and using his own voice, called, "Hey, Stanford, I'm back w-with food!"

Oh, great. Now even his voice was trying to give him away.

After a few moments, the door opened to show Ford wielding a flashlight. "Ah, so you are. Let me just check your eyes here quick."

Well, at least he wasn't aiming a crossbow at his face this time.

Stan nodded and stifled a yawn, shifting his grip on the food. "Go nuts. N-not, not literally, but y'know what I m-mean."

To his credit, Ford didn't try to manhandle him like he had before, only holding the light up to each of Stan's eyes and peering into them for a moment before nodding and clicking the light off. He gestured to the groceries in Stan's arms. "Let's see about getting those into the fridge, shall we?"

"Sounds l-l-like a plan to me." Stan managed a grin and stepped inside, shutting the door behind him.

"Did Bill try to do anything to you while you were out? Anything at all?" Ford asked, leading him into the kitchen.

Stan shrugged, trying to keep from shivering too badly. "Not that I know of, but we g-gotta do something about him, and fast. The f-f-folks in town think you're some k-kinda science hermit, but once they got a load of the whole 's-six fingers' thing, they just accept-ted you as one of their own! I think you'd l-l-like them. According to this c-classy lady at the store, the gnomes are s-supposed to swarm soon, whatever th-th-that means. She just s-said it, like it's no b-b-big deal!"

Ford paused, then squinted at him strangely. "Are you sure you're alright?"

"Peachy." Stan tried to say.

"Peach-ch-chy." Stan wound up saying.

Faster than Stan could process, (though even he had to admit that wasn't saying much at this point,) the back of Ford's hand pressed against his forehead, sending a flash of ice-cold down his spine before Ford yanked it away with a gasp. "Sweet Moses, Stanley, you're burning up!"

"P-peach-chy." Stan repeated, this time with as much sarcasm as he could manage, and an eyeroll, to boot.

Ford took the groceries from him and just put the entire bag into the fridge. "You need to get out of all those layers as soon as possible. The sooner your fever breaks, the better."

Stan wanted to insist he was fine. He wanted to shrug Ford's words off. He wanted to point out that his shivering would just get worse once he didn't even have the illusion of warmth.

What came out was a pitiful-sounding groan.

"Stanley?"

Stan grimaced and leaned heavily on the table, all five (no, wait, six, he was still in Ford's shape, how'd he forget that?!) fingers splayed out. Picking his words out very clearly, trying to force his teeth to stop chattering, he mumbled, "I think 'm just g-gonna go sit down for a bit."

"That would probably be for the best." Ford's answer came to him like from the bottom of the ocean, further cementing the fact that he wouldn't be able to just walk it off this time.

Stan gave a jerky nod and turned to head for Ford's spare room, only to stumble over his own feet with a gasp. Instead of slamming face-first into the wood floor, however, he somehow managed to drop into something much more forgiving that had definitely not been there a few moments ago.

Ford grunted at the same time, and Stan had just enough time to have the mortifying realization that he'd just collapsed into his brother.

The world didn't quite go dark after that, but it was the last thing he would remember clearly for a good, long while.

[us-ugay]

re: pumpkin shorts: arthur as a bard, known less for banging out the tunes and more for being a good source of info, as bards often historically were. He’s good at music and stuff but he’s more about rubbing elbows to get info. He usually roles put to whatever village hub and dishes out info and telling wonderful stories and maybe perchance makes a bit of extra money selling info that’s seen as a bit more valuable. Plus, I imagine he’s a really good storyteller. I think he’d be good at this. He would naturally piss some ppl off but he’s good at what he does and he knows it. He can get info from ppl who are convinced they won’t give any, whether that’s through being diplomatic or by being a bit manipulative. He’s got a lil hustle.

Meanwhile alfred is some sort of adventurer, constantly moving around bc he’s a restless guy and …Idk I haven’t thought that far. Maybe he has a deep motivation, maybe he’s just like “hell yeah this is fun.” But then arthur girlbosses a bit too close to the sun and pisses of some folks by distributing info he shouldn’t and they come after him and alfred manages to help him out (hired to? Just does it bc he can? idk) and… idk they hook up and adventure or smth corny. This is just bc I like the idea of pumpkin shorts arthur who knows too much. I just like a bard who has a lot of info and will piss u off but is still right about it.

yoooooooooooooo 👀👀👀👀

traveling bard arthur was not something i would have considered but im loving it

hes good at getting info and gossip and is great at story telling but he’s still his uncharismatic goblin self, so maybe he gets a bit too comfy in talking smack because he hadnt realized that people only put up w it so they could also get in on the tea

maybe its like a local lord or something that hes feasting with and arthur overestimates how close they are and does that thing where you playfully bring up shit people are saying like “oh yeah, id act like that too if my wife was also sleeping around 😏” but of course record scratch now the lord and his court is rightfully pissed the fuck off and the lord gets his knights and chases arthur out of town and with word of one lord turning on arthur the rest follow suit and now hes being hunted down through multiple kingdoms for espionage and knowing too much about the people in power

i always like alfred to be someone who dreams of adventure and glory but is just some small time schmuck so maybe hes a farmhand on some outskirt village that finds arthur in his barn one day because he was desperate for a place to hide out for the night 🤔 we’ll have to workshop an idea to get an actual plot into play about how arthur can actually save his own ass and not get executed by multiple kingdoms but essentially arthur smooth talks alfreds country bumpkin guillible and naive ass into helping him go on the run and alfreds just excited because wow the opportunity of a lifetime to go on an adventure literally just falls into his hayloft of course hes gonna go along w arthur if it means he can leave the village and explore the world

[darthbecky726]

Bad Batch 1x01 spoilers

I've never done something like this before, but I figured I'd start. Reactions to the first episode of The Bad Batch. (This ended up being a lot longer than I intended, but whatever)

Spoilers under the cut

Red logo burning away starts strong

Yay narrator dude!!

Feels like clones wars

Animated rots scenes!!

And what grevious did after the rots beginning

HOLY SHIT DEPA!!!!!

And caleb right???

And we're in

Omg who voiced young caleb bc it sounds a lot like fpj but aged down and he def doesn't sound like the 14 I know he was when this happened

I like how we started out on familiar characters but not ahsoka or anyone from tcw. We started w young kanan and his master and we know what happened to them and all but if anyone watching hasn't seen rebels they wouldn't be lost as to who caleb and depa are, they'd just assume they're random jedi in o66

Good ol droid screaming as it falls off a cliff

Wow. Them.

I love crosshair

And wrecker

And tech

And echo

And hunter

B1's are so dumb

Lmao the salt from hunter

I feel like depas forehead pearls are a bit unrealistically large but I have no cultural standpoint to really know so...

Caleb's voice is too deep in the same way that jack frost from rotg's voice doesn't match his character model

Ah wrecker not really knowing what she means and echo, the one who has been trained to deal w people and hung out w ani and obi is just like 'thanks general'

Obes kenobes mention

Why is echo so pale

Depa and caleb feel a little too pale too tbh I wonder if it's the lighting or the whitewashing

Wow caleb is a lot like ezra, I can see why kanan wanted to train him lol

Is this what separates caleb and depa, leading to her telling him to run??? Do I need to read dume???

Oh no

Noooooooooo

Bb didn't get the order!

Oh caleb nooooo! Nooooooo they didn't receive that order, they can help you!!!

And he's gone

Oh I need an au where caleb stayed with bb and they helped him after depa died

Hunter sounds so much like rex it's weird like ik they're supposed to sound the same but it feels like wrecker is replacing rex or something. Even tho ik rex's story is over for the time being

Crosshair, no! Don't shoot at him! He's baby

Oh no did crosshair get o66???? It didn't seem to trigger anything in any of the rest of them, but is crosshair close enough to 'reg' for it to have triggered???

😭😭good soldiers follow orders

"sure thing, boss" "hey hunter got a sitch"

Crosshair acting sus

Oh I love watching padawans fight, they're so good!!

I hope that hit to the tree did a lil cognitive recalibration for crosshair, he was acting crazy

Caleb looks so scared!! He just watched his master get gunned down by his friends and now strange clones are trying to kill him/confusing him

Oh caleb

Oh no crosshair don't try to kill him!! Hunters trying to help!

Also hunter doesn't sound as much like rex w the helmet off, but it's weird bc most of the clones are distinguishable by voice even w helmets on. I guess it's the 'im in charge' voice

Star wars if caleb had gone w the bb

Oh hunter u sly dog lying to crosshair so he doesn't go after him. U gotta figure out why crosshair responded to o66 and no one else in ur unit did

Oh crosshair knows he's been lied to

I will always love coming-out-of-hyperspace shots

Ooh kamino, always nice this time of year

Echo is done w wrecker

Why hasn't crosshair taken his helmet off yet, lil bit sus

They better get his chip out on kamino, I don't wanna deal w this

Oof hunter 

Oh who’s that, giving me cloud city vibes

Extreme cloud city vibes wow

Never realized how many clones are just on kamino

Coruscant guard?!?! FOX?!?!

The vibes here, omg

‘The war is over’ wow

Oh no who was that

A female jedi, doesn’t appear to be shaak, couldn’t see any montrals but never know, we don’t officially know how or where she died

Ok wow none of the bb has their helmets on except for crosshair, who got the order. The regs around kamino all have their helmets on. That scene in victory and death when ahsoka took rex’s helmet off- 

And crosshair, he’s actins strange too

Oh tech, do u guys get bullied by regs a lot??

I love their barracks

Lol he finally took his helmet off only to stick a toothpick in his mouth, can he get anymore cliched?

Wrecker is seeming a lot more infantilized than he was in the s7 eps...

Yeah crosshair’s being sus

Ooh, he shifted his toothpick

Lmao ‘what programming’

Well documented my ass

Tech’s speech patterns are so stiff and robotic, it’s like he has to remind himself to talk in basic instead of binary or some shit

Tech throwing shade at crosshair

I can’t quite tell if we’re supposed to like crosshair at this point

Lmao we been knew

Oop ‘more machine than man’ the vader parallels are serving folks

Understatement.

Ugh sheev

Crusty ass bitch

Straight from rots wow

Who is the mystery child and why does he look mandalorian

Ooh he gone

Oh no, the beninning of the empire

Cheering?? Why?!?

That imperial march fade in tho

Thank you echo

Oh shit mystery child is female

Omega, I would not have guessed the pronunciation of your name by reading it wow

She def seems mandalorian

Ugh kaminoans

Oh the kaminoan pronounced it as it usually is, huh.

Omega’s character model def seems more masculine than female, I now headcanon her as trans

Ugh tarkin, I hate that crusty bitch

Empire politics ugh

I love how much shade is being thrown at tarkin and his stormtrooper proposal lmao

Why do all these clones have the standard haircut?? ik them boys like their variety, even if these boys are still under o66′s programming

Wrecker you’re being extremely loud

They’re all being loud in the mess, why

They remember, kid

Lol child

Oh my sweet summer children

The dad instinct was clearly passed genetically from jango lol all these clones got it

Why are background characters so mean? What about it, shiny? Why is ur hair regulation, reg??

The Sad Batchn omg the slander

Lol the food fight I’ve read about in the fics, its finally happening!

Is she.... australian??

The over-animation of character movements in this is reminding me of the looser style of rebels, as opposed to the more clunky style of tcw

Lmao he’s still got food on him

Food fight!!

‘Not again’???!!! Echo!! Wdym not again?! Food fights have happened before?!?? Wait. W bb or w torrent, bc I can see torrent having food fights on the resolute-

Crosshair’s just eating his food until someone messes

I like how echo still has his kamas

Oh no echo!!

Oh echo’s trauma, he doesn’t trust medical droids! Where’s kix when u need him, huh?

Lol, comically long name for a robot trope is alive and well, huh

Lmao the droid lowers his voice like ik this is a perceived bad thing, but I will not tolerate this slander, boys u need to get off kamino

‘The shock’ lmao whyyy

Lmao tech!!

Oh, echo recognized tarkin from the citadel!

‘When you blew up’ lmao

Oh they make me sad

Aaaaah fox!

Man the domino squad nostalgia

Those droids look cool

This is a neat scene, I like seeing them in action

Wrecker reminding me of hevy, but he’s got the training and success to back it up

Live fire???? No!!

Ugh I hate tarkin

Oh no wtecker

Did he just get shot!???! 

Oh no crosshair, be careful!

Tarkin’s trying to kill them!!!

Lol wrecker I love you

Echo using his mech hand as a weapon, truly an arc

Now I wanna see what happened on felucia

I like how tech’s just sitting on the droid’s shoulders

And hunter just had a knife

These boys, I love them

Oh no tech bby

Hot damn that was cool

Wrecher things so too lmao

Tarkin’s like “why didn’t that work??’

Oh new baby clones

No tf they could not, they would never serve the empire and those bitches

I love that they have a window apartment lol

Ugh tarkin u shifty

They all stand at attention, only after glaring at tarkin

Oh no onderon

I hate tarkin, he’s a bitch

How quickly could bitch lord and darth sad have replaced the armory on kamino??

Crosshair still acting sus

Neither does echo, kid

No.

I like omega.

Crosshair, with the sassy hand on the hip-

What does that even mean?? Or elude to??

Lmao tech messing w wrecker, they rlly r bros

Its prob the vegetation

Oh, I missed onderon, but not this much

Lol the put-upon sigh

Its clearly saw and his rebels

Saw! Looking sharp, what’s w the hair....

That’s a very geometric beard, saw

They didn’t kill any jedi!

That’s not what happened, tech

‘The clones’ bitch that was rex and ahsoka, check urself

Aw, I’ve always like the design of imperial probe droids

Thank you, echo

It seems like crosshair’s o66 programming and his mutation are warring w his morals

Lmao the shade

I knew she was an enhanced clone!

Oh, so she is (at least on paper) trans! She’s a clone of jango, and yet she’s female! That must be her modification, but it makes me wonder why

Lol *flicks toothpick*

Aw, they have a picture of themselves! Recent-ish, too, its got echo!

Oh no, AZI!

The difference between them arriving earlier and now, the lack of escort...

Creepy how they had to open the hanger door themselves

Oh no! Everyone!

The coruscant guard, I wish they had gotten better

Tarkin u dramatic bitch

‘The brig’ this ain’t some tallship

Lol echo that shade

Their blacks are different from the ones seen in the past

Crosshair, stop being a bitch

Oh, I don’t like that phrase!! And the fact that crosshair screamed it in echo’s face makes me uneasy. Did rex fill echo in on why fives died?? I hope so...

Crosshair, ur chip hurting??

This child, I like her.

No! Don’t hit hunter!

No crosshair!!!!

I dislike this immensly

So they do still have inhibitor chips!

Tarkin you monster

Oh poor crosshair

ihatethisihatethisihatethis

Lol tech I love you

Wrecker you sweet pea

Lol that’s adorable

I love how they form a “wall” its so suspicious 

He was about to say that, omega

Aaww, echo protective boi

Wrecker shut up tf

That was cool

Sneaky bois

This reminds me of rex and ahsoka sneaking around in v&d

Echo runs so stupid

Oh no they winter soldier’d him!

If he says who the hell is crosshar, I will lose my shit

Yes, he has. They took it from him.

The toothpick

I wonder how they’re gonna get crosshair back to normal

Not good that they nabbed the sniper

Oh, crosshair shot him in the same place he got hit during training!

Ooh, a kaminoan on their side!

I hope omega doesn’t die

Poor trigger etiquette, crosshair

Wonder if omega has any speciality training

They’re just gonna leave him there!?!?!?!?!

Nooooooooooo!!!!!!!

Omega reminds me of young boba 

Oh, so its in her dna

Go back for crosshair!!

Holy fucking shit that was amazing! I didn’t expect it to be that long, but I’m not complaining! This ended up being a lot longer than I anticipated, but I don’t feel like cutting anything out, so sorry for the long post but at least I put it under a cut.