#but just. god. don't you fucking feel sick

[dsireland86]

MASKED PT.2 (The Part About Noah)

tags:

@philomenie @supersquirrel1996 @foliosgirl @angelmarie89 @fadingintothegrey @theanarchymuse95 @thisbicc @lma1986 @dominuslunae @shayzillaaaa

@dominuslunae

MASKED PT.1 (THE FOLIO PART)

The drama continues through Noah's point of view

18+ below

“Maybe I'm sick, maybe I'm already dead/Cause I'm not really scared of what comes next/Maybe I'm sick, maybe I'm fucked in the head/'Cause I'm not really scared of the consequence”

-HEDONIST-

Sunday: Midnight 

“Look at her. She's so fucking gorgeous sitting there with her head back and mouth opened, waiting for our cum.” 

I stroke her face, humming in approval when she leans into my touch. The sight of her on her knees before the two of us, with her hands tied behind her back and wearing nothing but her black bra is a sight to behold; one that I'd been dying to see since the day I first met her. 

“Who’s going first?” Folio asks.

I turn to him, feeling like I’m staring into a mirror. The black ski mask covers most of his face. Only his eyes and mouth are visible, with a little bit of skin showing around each. The band's white logo, the symbols of death, peace, and mind, stand out among all of the black like a scarlet letter, baring the images of sexual perversion and degradation in her mind, no doubt. 

“Why don't you go first? Show me how good her mouth can fuck.” Folio nods, undoing the button of his black jeans. 

I shift my gaze back to her, staring directly into her dark orbs that are wantonly awakened. The small smile, trapped in the corners of her mouth, makes the flutter in the pit of my stomach reach my cock. It twitches, throbbing with such an ache for release that I’m quickly losing my grip on my sanity. Her eyes drop, following my hand as I palm my erection hidden beneath my black stage pants. The way she stares, narrowing those beautiful eyes and clenching her jaw, makes the fire slowly burning through my veins ignite into a hot blaze. She wants this, more than I ever thought she would, leading me to think maybe she doesn’t hate me as much as I thought she did. 

I want my turn with her. I want to feel her fuck me with her mouth until she’s gagging and spitting as I grip her by the hair to keep her in place. I want her to take me over the edge and make me lose control. But I need to watch first. I need to watch the way she fucks her lover, who happens to be like a brother to me, and make him cum.

It’ll be my turn after that, one of the very many I’m free to have with her just for tonight. 

Saturday Morning: 

God she sounds beautiful. Her cries of pleasure ring throughout the house, bouncing off every wall, ripping through the silence and replacing it with her song of sexual fulfillment that could only be given to her by one man. She’s hungry for him, begging for more of what he’s putting down and from the sounds of it, he seems to be delivering. Folio’s got it all with her and it’s my fault. I let it slip out of my hands because my ego was louder than my love and somewhere in between, the lines blurred together. It got too hard for me to tell the difference between love and lust and eventually everything just blew apart. I was blinded, too dumb to realize how she really felt about me. Now it was too late.

Motherfucker.

The lewd sounds coming from the bedroom are unsettling and I can’t help but envision the two of them tangled up in one another, doing whatever it takes to get the other off. They both sound so desperate and needy, pathetically at the mercy of the other. I chew on my lips out of a nervous habit, fighting the temptation of wanting to watch them, to see their bodies come together in ways I've only ever thought about. I want to watch Folio wear the mask as he takes her, invades her and fills her full of him. I want to watch how she responds to him, the expression on her face changing with every new thing he does to her. I want to watch her cum. 

No. Shit. I want to feel her cum.

I begin to palm my swollen cock beneath the table, massaging slowly at first, but as her sounds grow louder, I unzip and take myself fully into my hand, going harder and faster in hopes of soothing the intense pressure building up. My dick is throbbing, the consistent pulsing pushing hard against my hand until finally, her sudden shrill of ecstasy rings through the deadly silence. 

I release my cock right before my climax hits, slamming a clenched fist down on the table while suppressing a deep growl of dissatisfaction for not meeting my own expectations. Out of breath, heart racing, and legs trembling, I stay seated, waiting for everything to come back into focus. After a few minutes, I stand up and adjust myself, taking a deep breath and letting it out quickly. 

I glance down at the table. The hollow eyes of the black ski mask meet mine. Its empty stare feels like it's challenging me, daring me to go through with the idea I've had in my head for days. The mask; it knows me, because it is me. Picking it up, I slip it on and glance into the nearby mirror. It sits well on me. Just like it always does.

Turning my head left and right, I stare at the man before me, shifting my sight from the white embroidered logos of death, peace, and mind, to my eyes, dark and narrowing. What will she think when she sees me? What will she say, if anything. I think too much when it comes to her. Fuck. She really is the death of my peace of mind.

Closing my eyes, I envision the blackness of the yarn running across the pale, delicate flesh between her legs as I devour her, eating her between her luscious folds until she’s crying my name and clawing my skin. I envision my covered nose dragging along the trail of her clit, breathing in the scent of her and stopping just above her entrance to circle the delicate pink flesh that's dripping wet. 

My whole body shudders. I’ve never wanted anything more than the way I want her. She's the only pleasure I want, the ecstasy I would kill for a taste of. I run my hands over the black yarn, and peer through the cracks of my fingers at the face before me. 

I’ve come to loathe the sight of it. It’s a face of trouble and regret and nothing good could come from it. The reasoning behind Folio’s request two nights ago has been eating away at me. He said he's worried about her, concerned that too much of the past is hurting her more than it should be. It's my fault. All of it.

I played games with her heart and eventually she got tired of my shit. When I saw she was moving on, finding the love and attention she wanted and needed in Folio, I got pissed off, jealous that she wasn’t all about me anymore, or at least I thought she wasn’t.  

So, I got drunk at a party one night and fucked some random girl in a bathroom. I thought I’d won until she walked in on the two of us right as I pulled out and came all over the back of the girl whose face I don’t even remember. I'll never forget the look on her face. It shattered my heart, burning its way into my memory forever. It scared my heart. I ran after her but then watched her run right into the arms of my best friend. 

Pain. Agonizing hurt. Bitterness. All of it flooded my head, taking over every thought until I was finally honest with myself. I was in love with her, but I was too toxic for her. She didn’t deserve me. She deserved Folio. He would protect her heart; make her feel safe. He would dry her tears and hold her close, doing his best to mend the heart that I had shattered. Because of how much I hated myself, I shut them both out. At times, I think I was meaner to her than I was before I fucked everything up, yet too selfish to care about the heart I broke. I couldn��t get past my own hurt while I ignored hers

Thank god everything eventually smoothed over. The past got buried leading me to believe she got over it and moved on with Folio. But maybe I was wrong to believe that. Was she still living in the past, with hurt and pain that she never actually got over, only threw a band aid over just like I did?

Which brings me back to the reason I’m here

He’s given me permission to have a masked affair with her, but only if she’s willing. The idea is so fucked up; Folio allowing me to violate and penetrate what he’d fuck another guy up over if he touched her the way that I want to touch her. I can’t wrap my thoughts around any of it. 

“Folio! Hey, I’m running over to the cafe for some breakfast. Do you want me to bring you two anything?” “Yeah, that would be great, thanks. We’re just…, we’ll be out in a few minutes.”  “No rush. You two sound busy. I’ll be back in a few.”

I stand at the door for a moment, fighting the urge to open it, leaning my forehead against it and taking a deep breath before walking away. I toss the ski mask on the table as I pass by, walking right out the front door, pulling it closed behind me.

“I'm taking it slowly, you'd never know/How quick it gets lonely here at the top/Her skin feels unholy, but I'm still drawn/The morals I'm holding, you know they're gone”

-Bad Decisions-

Sunday: Midnight

She’s confused when I grab both of her wrists and gently pull them behind her back. “What are you doing?” I can sense the alarm in her voice and it makes me grin with satisfaction. 

After tying the knot around her wrists, not too tight but enough to know she can’t get out of the restraint, I lean over her shoulder and run my covered nose up the side of her neck, clenching my jaw as she leans her head back just enough for me to kiss the hollow of her throat. “I want you at my mercy while I do all the sick, perverted things I’ve been dreaming about for months, Princess.” 

Her shallow whimper weakens me. I’m hard as a rock and a part of me hates it, hates her, for making me want her this much, and I hate myself for not having more self control when it comes to her. My jaw ticks with the rhythm of my pulse as I grab her by the hair, yanking her head back further and looking deep into her eyes. They skim over the mask covering my face and I catch the glimmer of desire in them. “God, Noah,” she breaths. The sound of my name slipping from her pink, luscious lips arouses me, making me more desperate than before. 

“You look…” but she bites her lip instead of finishing her thought. “Don't bite your lip.” My stare is fixated on her. “Why?” “Unless you want to find yourself slammed against the wall with my hands pressed between your legs and around your throat. Do you want that?” She shakes her head as best she can. “Good. Then get on the bed and on your fucking knees for me, Princess.” 

A devious smile spreads across her mouth as she willingly obeys, but not before getting swept up in a heated kiss from Folio. His skin against hers is something they’re used to seeing, but I’m not. And even though it shouldn’t, it turns me on. He whispers something in her ear and she nods, but I catch the swift move of his finger swiping up her wet pussy, noticing how her body responds to it; automatically aroused. 

She looks back at me and stands on the tips of her toes. I know what she wants, so I indulge her by taking her lips by brutal force, groaning as my tongue plunges its way into her mouth and licking deep. Her response has the pre-cum slipping from the slit on my cock soaking a small spot of my briefs. 

“On the bed, on your knees, and ass up, now, Princess,” I growl against her lips.

               Saturday Afternoon

She’s sitting on the edge of the kitchen counter with her arms folded tightly across her chest, staring down at the floor below her. A few moments ago, when she came out into the kitchen and saw me standing here, I swear if looks could kill, I’d be dead.

She fucking hates me.

Peering up, she scowls at me, eyebrows coming together to form the cutest angry face I've ever seen her make. I snicker, but she just rolls her eyes and looks away. 

Shit. 

But then she looks back, locking me in an intoxicating stare that’s harsh and unmerciful, and I can’t get a breath down as I drown in it. But I welcome it and all the pain that comes with it. “Hey man, are you sure she’s up for this? Have you even told her yet?” I tap Folio on the shoulder to get his attention. He shakes his head. and my brain immediately starts to freak out. “Fuck, Folio! No wonder she’s pissed. You didn’t tell her anything?” “No.” His answer is taut and quick. 

“Great. She already hates that I’m breathing. This idea is likely to cause her to drive a knife through my chest! I thought we already talked about this the other night!” “Will you stop being so damn dramatic, Noah! Chill, dude!” he says, raising his voice. Folio may be smaller than me, but he’s feisty as hell. And when he raises his voice in a certain tone, one knows he’s serious. It’s obvious to me he’s pretty fucking serious right now. 

“Look, you think whatever you want to, okay, Noah? But I know my girl, like I know my kit and my Harley, alright? Yeah, she’s still kinda angry about the past, but not enough that she wants you dead or anything close to that. But you two have shit you need to work out. It’s been too fucking long that the hostility and weirdness between the two of you has been going on."

I scowl, completely caught off guard .

"You’re not the only ones it’s affecting, Noah. It’s killing me, and both of you keep beating around the fucking bush, meeting on the one side, only to turn around, avoid each other, then meet on the other side, again. It’s ridiculous and it has to stop. All the bickering, the awkwardness when we’re all together and the fact that neither of you can be left in the same room together without fighting, is starting to piss all of us off. Not to mention the fights she and I are starting to have, but that’s besides the point.” 

I frown in confusion. “Fights? You two are fighting? Folio,” “Don’t, Noah. Our relationship is not your business.” Folio rubs his jawline. Pinching the bridge of my nose, I shake my head over thinking there is no way any of this is going to work. But Nick’s right about one thing. She and I do have shit to get over. But it doesn’t matter. Nothing I say or do will ever make things right between us. 

“There is no way she’s going for this, Nick. There’s no chance in hell she’ll even let me near her let alone… allow me to touch her.” Those last words hit my heart hard. "All I’ve wanted for months is to just hold her and tell her I’m sorry, but we can’t even be in the same room together for too long. I'm actually surprised we've lasted this long." “Well, something's keeping her here. She hasn't gotten mad at you yet." “That’s because you’re here,” I scoff.

Folio growls in frustration “Noah, listen to me,” he orders, clearly annoyed. “Ever since the night of that party, I’ve had to watch her beat herself up over and over again, trying to put the broken pieces of her heart back together. I’ve done what I can to help her, but there’s a piece that’s missing. I see the way it’s affecting her and she doesn’t even realize it. 

“Okay, so what does any of this have to do with me and her?” Folio rolled his eyes. “God, you're so freaking dumb sometimes, dude. You're the piece, Noah! Shit! You've always been the piece.” “What…what do you mean “I’m the piece”,” I stammer.

Folio sighs, removes his hat to run his hands through his hair, then puts it back on, inhaling a deep breath and exhaling it quickly. “There are nights when she's asleep that I hear her say your name. It's never dramatic, nothing sexual. Just simple. Sweet. For some damn reason, you still mean so much to her, Noah. I can’t, for the life of me, understand why. I mean, it was bad enough when you took your shit out on me, hating me and whatever, but the way you treated her, when she wasn’t even the one who did anything wrong, dude… you fucked her up pretty good. The games you played with her mind, Noah… you don’t even know man.” 

Folio shakes his head, turning away from me. “So that’s what this is all about? Closure? Tying up loose ends?” I grumble. “More like you taking responsibility and owning up to what you did. Admit to her the truth so she can stop feeling like shit about all of it.” “I only did what I did because she dropped me like a bad fucking habit, Nick, and moved on to you! Fuck!” 

I run both hands through my hair, pulling at the roots with frustration from all this insanity. “You were even between her legs that night, man! I heard the two of you. So, don't preach to me about how bad I hurt her! She didn't fucking care about me.” “Really, Noah! That’s how you justify it? When are you going to understand that she only gave up waiting for you? She didn’t give up on you. She only came to me, falling into my arms that night, because she caught you fucking another girl after she spent countless days, weeks, hell even months, trying to show you that she wanted you. Don't you dare say she didn't care about you! She cared way too much for you! You shattered her heart for no good fucking reason other than your ego was wounded. She tried showing you, Noah. She tried telling you that she wanted you, but you ignored her. You played sick mind games with her. You know you made this mess, and now I’m telling you, you’re going to fix it. I’m give you the fucking chance to fix it!” 

I bite my tongue, holding back all the things I want to say but know I shouldn’t. Folio is right about everything, but for some reason I can’t let go of wanting her to accept the blame for what she did to me when she moved on so quickly with my best friend. 

“What chance are you giving him, Nick?” 

Her voice startles both of us. Folio looks at me eyes wide and full of regret. This wasn’t how he wanted her to find out. She hops down off the counter and comes over to us, walking right past me like I’m a ghost. Her persistence in ignoring me pricks my heart. Folio throws his hands on his head, messing with his hat nervously. I need to be the one to handle this. I’ve caused my brother enough grief.

“A chance to fix the past. A masked affair, Princess,” blurting out just as Folio opens his mouth to speak. Slowly, she turns and looks at me. “I’m sorry, what?” There’s no mistaking the surprise in her voice. 

“A masked affair. You do know what an affair is, right?” “Yeah, Noah, I know what it is,” she states, clearly irritated. Ohhh, she’s getting pissy with me. It won’t be long now before the two of us are arguing. “Good,” I grin, taking a step closer towards her only for her to take a step back, but she doesn’t turn and leave like she normally does when I make her mad. My eyes quickly snap up to hers, locking them in a heated stare; one that's instigating my inner depravity. 

I feel that familiar feeling I get every time she and I start to fight, but this time, there’s something more to it; a certain tension that was never there before, drawing the two of us together. And the fact that she’s not running from me this time, is alarming. “Then, maybe you can show me if that mouth is good for something else other than sarcasm.” There’s a fire that ignites in her eyes and it makes my heart slam into my chest like a fist to a punching bag. Every beat of it bridges the gap between us.

“Excuse me!” “Holy shit!” Folio utters. “Noah, what the fuck?”  “What?” “A bit much, don’t you think?” I laugh. “Not enough.” She stares at me and Folio, her narrow eyes darting back and forth between us. “Okay, one of you better tell me what the hell is going on, right now.“ “I will if you come here.” 

“No! Not a chance, Noah,” she snaps. I clench my teeth, tossing my head from side to side to relieve the tension. Her unwillingness to submit to me only turns me on even more. I guess it’s time to get dirty. “Alright, let's try this again, Princess. And if you get pissy with me again, I’ll make you sorry for that mouth. Now, come here,” I demand, raising an eyebrow. Folio is quiet, unsure if he should interject or not.

At first she just stands there, seemingly unsure about where this is all coming from and where it could possibly be going, making me think she’s not going to do as I told her, but then she surprises me by taking a few awkward steps towards me. “That’s better. Now, look at me.” I expect to find a lot of angst when she does, but instead I find tears and it rips my heart apart. I did this to her. I caused her pain. And as I wipe the tears away that slide down her cheeks, surprised she doesn't pull away, I can no longer control my need to kiss her. I have to fucking kiss her.

With one hand, I gather the back of her hair and gently yank her head back, hearing a soft whimper fall under her breath and use my other hand to wrap around her throat. Licking my dry lips, I glance over her sweet face and in an instant our lips crash together in such a heated kiss that it could set the place on fire. My lips glide over hers as I kiss the corners of her mouth, slowly dragging my tongue to the middle of her lips and biting down. The second she gasps, I slide my tongue through her parted lips and stroke hers, massaging it the same way I know I’m going to massage her pussy later. 

Her hands gather the sides of my shirt, unexpectedly pulling me closer and causing me to stagger like a drunk man. But then she pulls away and the sudden loss of her lips is torture. “I hate you,” she sneers, pulling herself out of my grip and shoving me away from her. Her chest is rapidly rising and falling, proof I've kissed her well, and her cheeks are covered with a pretty shade of a deep pink flush. Her aggression towards me is intoxicatingly hot and all I want to do now is grab her by the hair again, bend her over and fuck her senselessly until her moans turn into screams for me. 

“You hate me, huh,” I echo her claim. “Yes,” she spits. “I hate you.” I fight the urge to kiss her again. “Why?” “You know why, Noah. Don’t make me say it.” “Maybe I do know,” stepping closer, “but maybe I want to hear you say it. Tell me why you hate me.” I grab her wrists and she gasps. Our bodies are almost touching again and I can feel her warmth radiating onto me. This is the closest I’ve been to her in months.  

I forgot how beautiful she is. Her freckles, her brown eyes, her laughter lines, all of it makes me ache with misery over what I did to her and what it cost me. “I don’t want to. You already know,” she accuses. But I won’t accept her answer. “Please, tell me. I need you to tell me, Princess,” My plea comes out as a whisper only she can hear and I know I’ve let my guard down too far when the hard glare in her eyes softens and so does her resistance against me. 

My heart is pounding, feeling like it might explode out of my chest, because of how vulnerable I’ve just made myself. “Because you were cruel to me Noah. You broke my heart and you didn't even care.” And there it is. There’s the fucking slap to the face, the punch to the gut, the salt to the wound that I've been waiting for; the one I deserve. She closes her eyes and more tears spill out, running down her face and smearing the faint traces of her makeup. 

The amount of rage that swells inside me is enough to flatten an entire city. It’s not just rage for the shit I did, but she did as well. The way she crawled into Folio’s bed and allowed him between her legs when she didn’t get what she wanted from me, or pushed me away the many times I tried to apologize to her. No, she wasn’t the only victim here. We both were. But if there’s one thing I’m absolutely sure of now it’s that she doesn’t hate me. She only thinks she does. And I’ll convince her she doesn't once I’m between her legs, buried deep inside her and showing her how much I ache for her just like I know she aches for me. 

“I cared, baby. I cared more than you'll ever know.” She looks at me confused. “Then why didn't you,” “Why didn't I tell you? I tried. But you were so focused on your hurt and getting fucked by my best friend that you didn’t notice.” A look of shock sweeps across her face. “I heard the two of you that night and every night after. And I saw you, too, one night by the pool. You were wearing that little red one piece that hugs your body so well. I watched Folio rip it off you and fuck you against the concrete before yanking you into the water where he made you cum.” Her face is flushed , bringing out the pretty shade of red on her cheeks.

“And then there was the night he fucked you on the kitchen counter before bending you over the table and plowing into, making you scream. God, he was a fucking beast to you that night. I got so mad that he was that rough with you.” I caressed her face, wiping away her tears. “I cared, baby. You just didn't give me the chance to tell you." She was so quiet, fighting hard to get control of her emotions.

“Noah, I’m,” I capture her lips in mine, silencing her apology before she even gets those stupid, goddamn words out, the same ones I've been needing to hear after all this time. But now that I'm about to, I don't need her to say she's sorry. I just want her to not hurt anymore. “Don't,” I shake my head. “You don't need to,” I pause, clenching my teeth and taking a deep breath through my nose. “You don't hate me, Princess.” My cock is burning erratically, throbbing recklessly to the point that it’s maddening. 

I yank her head back by the hair again as my hand reclaims its place around her neck, rubbing my thumb along her jawline and disarming her from anything she’s about to say next. Her breath hitches in the back of her throat and she tries to swallow, making the small bump of her Adam's apple enticing enough to eat; and that’s what I do.

Without hesitating, I lean down and take a bite, biting down lightly but with enough force so she knows I’m the one in control. She cries out softly, wrenching down on my shoulders, and digging her nails into my skin. I hiss beneath the bite, sucking the spit up before turning the bite into a pretty reddish bruise. Grazing the skin of her throat with my teeth, I turn the biting and sucking into a kiss.

The loud gasp she makes as I breathe in her scent, penetrates my veins and crawls its way to my memory and I hum in approval as I taste her salty skin on my tongue feeling the subtle yet powerful whimpered moan that escapes her vibrate against my lips. My cock twitches just enough for her to feel it against her belly. 

“Noah,” she whispers my name as I suck the skin of her neck some more, leaving faint little marks behind, claiming her as mine now; even if it’s only for tonight. Her hands snake around my neck, depending on my strength alone to hold her up. “You know what I hate?” I growl, lifting my head to face her, kissing her lips before continuing. “I fucking hate the way Folio touches you,” I say, the distaste of the idea clear in my tone. Folio takes a few steps towards us. The man’s on the edge of his seat and I couldn’t be happier. I run my nose up and down her skin, turning her head and breathing her in on every side.

“I can't stand how he looks at you, how he makes you his with every scream, every moan that you make when he fucks up into you,” sneering through clenched teeth, tightening the grip I have on her. She swallows hard, tears slipping from the corners of her eyes again when I lift my head to look at her. “I heard you this morning, too, Princess. I was sitting at the table, wearing the black mask, envisioning I was the one fucking you while getting my self off. I almost did. And that fucking fantastic moment you came for Folio, all over his face,” I smile, kissing her again, “god, I can’t explain to you the way it made me feel. I envy Folio. I envy everything he has with you, because it should be mine.”

Her eyes dart back and forth as she’s holding her breath. I'm under her skin now, making my way quickly into her veins. It’s just a matter of moments before she gives in to me. “You sounded so fucking beautiful. The way he fucked you must have been satisfying. Was it?” I caress the side of her face with the back of my fingers, leaning down and kissing her cheek. 

“I bet I can make you cum harder, though. What do you think, huh?” She whimpers, making the fire in my abdomen ignite and I feel the wetness of my underwear against my erection. Fuck. Taking a shaky breath, I run my hand over her neck, releasing my grip for a moment to lean down and take her lips with mine, this time forcing my tongue into her mouth. At first she fights with me, but then I feel hers run over mine, allowing me to meet hers and together, our tongues dance. My knees grow weak. I’m not sure how much longer I can keep this game up.

“God, you have no idea how much I fucking want you! The thoughts that I have about how I want to fuck you and punish you for letting another man put his hands on you. How much I want to strip you naked and pound into that sweetly soaked pussy of yours that you allow Folio to fuck whenever he wants,” I growl against her mouth as she releases a needy moan. “Noah,” she whines. I slip my hand under her shirt just to graze the skin beneath the waistband of her shorts. I can tell her nerves are on fire from the way goosebumps prickle her skin. “I want it, Princess. I want all of you, but can’t have it,”

She closes her eyes briefly as more tears slip out from the corners of her eyes. “Noah,” she softly whines again, letting her hands fall to my shoulders. “Not until you say I can.” She gasps, blinking a few times. Without saying another word, I turn her head and run my nose, lips and tongue up the side of her neck, taking the bottom lobe of her ear between my teeth and suck on it before pulling away. The whimper she gives me makes my cock ache deeply. “Fuck, Princess, I wanna ruin you, damage you inside and out until all you know is the shape of my cock,” I mumble, nipping and kissing her neck some more. She’s wrecked from my words alone. 

I smile at knowing I’ve won. “I'm done waiting,” I tell her harshly, laying my forehead against hers. “Waiting for what?” she questions, her voice quivering. “To get what I want, Princess.” She swallows hard. “And what do you want, Noah?” she softly asks.

“I want you. I want your sex, I want your taste in my mouth. I want your cum on my cock. I want you to let me fuck you, to sink my dick so far into you, hitting that spot that’ll have you screaming until your voice is hoarse and I break you and make you feel empty when I'm done. I want to ruin you and make you take what I give you until you’re begging for more, never satisfied until you can feel me in every single cell of your body for days. I want you, Princess. Every single part of you.”

I release her but she makes no attempt to separate us. Her hands have left my shoulders, standing fully on her feet now, but I can still feel her grip on them. Her chest is quickly rising and falling. She’s fighting all the thoughts running through her mind, including the ones I’ve planted. She’s going to tell me no. I can feel it. I can see it in the look on her face. I brace myself for the let down.

“Fine,” she says, in a voice sure and strong. I grin, taking a deep breath and letting it out quickly. I’ve won. “See, you don’t hate me. You do like me.” Her jaw clenches.” “And you know you want me.” She looks away. “Dammit, Princess , why can you just admit the truth? Why do you keep lying to yourself?” When she doesn’t answer, Folio steps in between us, looking only at her. “Tell him, Sweetheart. Tell Noah the truth. I'll be okay, I promise. I know you love me.” “I'm in love with you, Nick, you’re my world,” she cries as more tears trickle down her cheeks. Folio smiles softly at her.

“I know that too, baby. It's okay. Just tell him the truth,” he encourages her. Her eyes meet mine. I can’t read them. There’s too many mixed emotions. “You want me to say it? Fine, I'll say it. I fucking hate your guts Noah Sebastian. I hate everything about you; the way you look, the way you smile, the way you laugh,” she pauses and steps closer to me. “I hate the way you make me feel; so helpless, so weak. And, hate… fuck! I hate the way I fucking love you, Noah. I hate that I want you! Are you happy? I fucking want you.”

My heart explodes inside me, leaving me feeling like I’ve won everything, but lost it all at the same time. She loves me. She wants me. But I can’t keep her… I can’t keep her. So if I can’t keep her, then I need to make sure I leave enough scars for her to remember what happens here tonight. I will ruin her. I’ll damage her so she won’t forget about us, forget about me and that for one night, she was mine.

“No way to right these wrongs/Either way, I'm feeling, it might just cost /something in the millions/I know that I can't resist/You know I can't just stop”

-Somebody Else-

              Saturday Evening:

“Are you sure you're okay with this, Sweetheart,” Folio asks her, removing her shirt and tossing it on the floor. His pupils instantly darken at seeing her small breasts covered by the black cotton bra. I should have known she was nothing fancy. Simple and basic; one hundred percent her and I couldn’t love it more. He hooks his fingers around the waistband of her shorts and pulls them down, revealing her matching panties, and tosses them over with the shirt. Both of them are silent as he stands there admiring her.

I grin at seeing her cheeks redden. “Nick, are you okay,” she asks sweetly. He nods and caresses her cheek. “Then why are you staring at me like that?” “Because, I love you and I love seeing you naked.” She giggles. “Well, technically, I’m not naked yet.” “Yeah, well give me two seconds and you will be!” Folio tackles her, grabbing her sides and making her squeal in delight. He puts her down, looking over at me. “You’re positive you want to do this?” he asks her, hesitatingly. “This was your idea, remember?” She slides her hands up his chest, running her fingers over his chin. "God, why are you so freaking cute?" Folio smiles, chuckling lightly.

He kisses her on the lips, holding her around the waist, closely. She doesn't let him go, but instead pulls him closer to her with their lips still locked tightly together, leading them over to the couch where she lowers herself down and spreading her legs wide open, running her hand over her covered pussy. She looks at me as she does it and I I groan, low and deep in my chest, biting the inside of my cheek. My cock is already so fucking hard, aching with the need to release. I grab it, rubbing it slightly to help ease the feeling, but it doesn’t help. 

“Fuck, baby,” Folio mutters, lowering himself down closer to her, bracing himself with one hand against the back of the couch while the other is trailing up the side of her neck and over her lips. “I want you too, Nick,” she says loud enough for me to hear. “I can’t let Noah have what he wants without you getting it too. I need to please you both.”

“Holy shit,” Folio laughs, grinning wildly as he rubs his crotch against her knee. There's no way she's implying what I think she's implying, but I ask anyway. “What are you saying, Princess? You want a threesome?” Folio looks from her to me and then back to her, waiting for her to answer, completely unsure if her heard me right. “Well, I don’t want you two to do anything, I just want you both to have me. I want to please both of you.” Folio looks over at me again, shaking his head slowly. His eyes are wide, proof of how surprised he is by her request. "Well?" “I’m game if you are,” he agrees. I look at her and watch the way her fingers wander purposely over her pussy, causing my heart to pound against my chest. It’s enough for me. “Fuck it. Fine, Princess. You can have us both.” 

She smiles, licks her bottom lip, and turns back to Folio, reaching up to undo his belt. But before she follows through, she stops. “The mask." Her eyes light up. "What about it," he says quietly, dragging his finger down between her breasts. "You told me you brought it with you. If this is a masked affair then you need to play your part, too. Put the mask on for me, Nicky, please.” A wide grin spreads over his face. “You want me to wear the mask? You wanna fuck like we did at home the last time I wore it?” She nods her head, shyly, slipping the tip of her finger in between her teeth. Seeing it makes my heart race. The urgency of how much I'm needing her is disgusting, but I welcome it.

 Folio leaves her, going over to his bag to retrieve the mask, and stares at me as he walks by. God, I hope this doesn’t turn into a fucking competition. When he returns to her, slipping the mask on as he stands before her, her hands return to his belt and continues their task of unbuckling it. “Is this better?” She grins approvingly and nods. She looks over at me, take a long breath as he pushes her black panties to the side and immediately slips his fingers inside her. The moan that escapes her goes straight to my cock, making the muscles in my abdomen tighten.

Holy fuck.

Inching closer to them, slipping my mask on and hiding behind the safety of the my alter ego, I focus on Folio as he works his finger deeper inside her walls, pulling small cries and whimpers from her. Her eyes are closed, focusing hard on the connection between her orgasm and Folio's fingers. Each one of her needy moans echo through the room, bouncing off the walls and into the deep caverns of my brain where I commit them to memory. Seeing the way Folio intently feels her, fucking her slowly but aggressively is almost too much. It's turning me on too much and I feel like I might cum just from watching them. I palm my swollen cock, groaning as I shift it beneath the confines of my pants, I focus my thoughts on the two of them instead of my need to cum, but it's impossible. The two go hand in hand at this point.

“Goddamn, sweetheart, Folio hums, licking his lips. "You're so fucking wet. Look how coated my fingers are,” he groans, pulling them out to show her how her arousal glistens on his fingers. "Nick," she moans, breathlessly as he takes them in his mouth and licks the taste of her. "Open," he commands her, and she listens, opening her mouth just enough for him to insert his two fingers inside her mouth. Her lips seal around them and she proceeds to suck them. She runs the side of her tongue against them, making Folio, curse an growl loudly.

"Holy fuck, what are you trying to accomplish, baby?" he laughs nervously. She pulls him down to her lips and kisses him, and they put their tongues on full display, lapping and sucking, beneath a heated kiss. His fingers find her pussy again and he slips inside her, coating his fingers in her juices again, no doubt. I'm a fucking mess, consumed by a desperate lust to claim her body. I give up fighting and fully give into the need for the filthy dabauchery overtaking every thought that's crossing my mind.

“Are you this wet just for me or for him too?” Folio asks her, grinding his cock on her thigh as he braces himself against the couch while thrusting up inside mer. “Both,” she admits quickly and honestly. Folio’s head lowers, and he releases a deep grunt, overtaking her lips again. “If I wasn’t so turned on by it, I’d be fucking pissed,” he admits. Pulling his fingers out, he rips her panties off, purposely throwing them at my feet. I look up into the face of my mirror image, disgusted by the smug grin on his face.

"Fuck you, Folio," I mumble. His mouth twitches an he gives me a lop-sided grin. But as soon as he turns away, I snatch the panties and shove them into my pocket.

Keeping his eyes focused on her, she gasps loudly the moment Folio thrusts his fingers back inside her more violently than before. He doesn’t give her time to react as he slams his lips into her and they take a moment to devour each other again. I groan, toss my head back, and palm myself again, trying to alleviate the growing pressure that’s rapidly building.

“Oh god, baby, that feels so good,” she moans, arching her back and bucking her hips while reaching for Folio. He comes back into her embrace, kissing her and praising her while giving her what she wants with just his fingers. “I know you like this, baby, but I’m dying to taste you,” he mumbles against her lips. “I wanna eat you and make you cum on my tongue, just like I did this morning,” he grins, pulling his fingers out of her one more time.

My heart is racing over what I’m about to see. Folio glances over at me, checking to see if I'm still watching, and once he's satisfied, he turns back to her “Noah’s watching, baby. You got to show him how good I can make you cum, show him who owns this sweet pussy of yours." She sighs, as he places gentle kisses on her belly. "Tease him sweetheart. Make him want you." Folio inches his way down her body, leaving a trail of kisses in his wake. She places her hands on either side of head, guiding him along her body, tangling her fingers in his hair once he finds her clit.

She allows her legs to fall wide open, revealing that sweet, decadent spot of hers that is the center of all her pleasure. My jaw drops at the sight of it. It's pink, wet and so fucking beautiful. I lick my lips, parting them in desperation to feel it beneath my tongue.

The feeling is too much. I need to get off from watching this. It's the only thing that will satisfy me. Like an addict craving his addiction, I quickly undo the strings to my pants, freeing my hard swollen shaft, I pump it a few times, sighing loudly as a copious amount of precum coats my fingers, creating the perfect lubricant for what I'm about to do. I run my hand over the tip, letting my head fall back, the moment I see Folio dive in fully masked, sliding his tongue up her slit, sucking her clit, slowly.

Her breath catches in the back of her throat, arching her back the moment Folio take her swollen bud between his teeth and flicks it with the tip of his tongue. She cries out, moaning his name like a prayer grinding her cunt against his face in a desperate attempt to feel more.

This is so fucking wrong, watching them like own personal porno, I can't pry my eyes away. I don't want to, honestly. The feeling rushing through my veins is unlike anything other feeling I've ever felt. "Oh, fuck," I moan, taking my balls in my hand and rubbing them around in my hand. My legs are trembling as they try to hold my weight up, biting back moans that are desperately trying to escape.

My heart’s pounding in my chest. I can’t suppress the arousal building in me or how good it feels sliding my hands in and out over my erection. I want to cum so badly, but not yet. “Oh fuck, Noah!” I raise my head only to find her staring at me. She's grinning in surprise, while pushing Folio's face harder into core. “You have no idea how fucking hot you look right now.” My heart pounds against my chest from both arousal and excitement. “Yeah? Is this doing something for you, watching me get myself off while your boyfriend eats you out?" "Mmmhmm, yeah is does," she moans, licking her lips and furrowing her brows. "Does it make you want to cum hard, baby? Do you want to cum for just Folio or for me too?"

Her pants are becoming more erratic, her chest heaving in and out faster. "I want to cum for both of you," she whines. "I want, I, oh fuck baby," she moans, running her hands over the back Folio's head , fingers through his hair, gripping and pulling it. “Good fucking god," I breath, releasing an unrestrained moan. Folio stops and looks over at me. His mouth is soaked and so is the part of the mask where his nose is. 

“Like what you see, brother?” he asks, voice deep and raspy. “She tastes fucking amazing,” he informs me, looking up at her. He kisses the insides of her thighs before she pushes him back into his place between her legs, where he dives right back in, devouring her. "Nick, baby, I'm so close." "I know you are. I can feel how tight you are," he says, laying his hand on her abdomen. "You're clenching around my tongue. I need you to cum for me, Sweetheart."

Folio inserts his fingers inside her again, thrusting in and out while licking and swallowing up her juices. "Nick, I'm about to cum, baby. Shit," she moans, breathing erratically. Her thighs tighten around Folio's the moment her orgasm hits her, making her swear, while crying out Folio's name. "Don't stop, baby, she pants, holding him in place as she cums in his mouth like he wanted her too. I clench my teeth and groan, right before releasing my cum and spilling all over my hand and the floor. 

“Goddammit,” I hiss, dropping to my knees, completely out of breath. "Fuck me, motherfucker!"

I’ve never made myself cum that hard before. When I look over at them, Folio is wiping his face and she’s watching me with an alluring look that I never thought I’d see in her eyes.

“That was so fucking hot, Sebastian,” she confesses with a grin. I’m still trying to catch my breath, but manage a light chuck as Folio tosses the towel at me.

“Look at her. She's so fucking gorgeous sitting there with her head back and mouth opened, waiting for our cum.” 

I stroke her face, humming in approval when she leans into my touch. The sight of her on her knees before the two of us, with her hands tied behind her back and wearing nothing but her black bra is a sight to behold; one that I'd been dying to see since the day I first met her. “Who’s going first?” Folio asks. “Why don't you go first? Show me how good her mouth can fuck.” Folio nods, undoing the button of his black jeans and stepping out of them. 

I caress her face as she looks up at me. I stare at her, wondering what the hell I was thinking when I made the choices that I did. What made me think I could find anything better than her. Folio steps up beside me wearing nothing but the black ski mask with eyes focused solely on his girl who’s about to give him what we're craving. Her face is flushed with a shade of light pink covering her cheeks and the way she licks her lips when Folio moves closer to her has my head running in circles.

Without hesitating, she takes him in her mouth, a little bit a first and then sliding down the whole length of his shaft, completely absorbing him. Folio throws his head back in complete ecstasy as she begins to suck his cock, glancing over at me with a grin. “She’s that good?” I asked, unable to take my eyes off her and the way her tongue slides up and down the back of his shaft.  “Yeah, she’s that fucking good,” Folio growls. His hand lowers to her head as he brushes the loose hair out of her face. “Fuck me, baby, god dang,” he sighs. Slowly, he starts degradingly and savagely fucking her mouth, holding the base of it so she can take all of him until she's deep throating him. She gags when it hits the back of her throat, causing excess saliva to seep out and trickle down her chin.

Reaching down, I can't help but squeeze my cock again as I imagine her on her knees before me, and those red lips wrapped around my dick. Folio grabs her by the hair and holds her in place, picking up the pace of fucking her mouth, aiming to get the satisfaction he wants from her. The room is filled with her loud muffled moans and Folio’s harsh grunts and words of praise that have her in tears. “That’s it baby girl, take it all. Fuck my cock, just like that,” he growls, watching her intently. “Use your teeth, baby.” He hisses, releasing a feral grunt. “Drag them down my cock. God...damn, yeah that’s it baby, like that, he praises through endless pants. He pounds into her mouth releasing a string of curses. “You like it, I know you do. You love it when I fuck your mouth like this."

It's not much long that his thrusts start to grow sloppy and weak, signaling he’s nearing the edge. “Baby girl, you're making me cum," he moans. His thrusts grow shorter and softer. “Shit, shit, fuck baby, don't stop, don't stop, I'm gonna cum, fuck!” he yells again before pulling out of her mouth and spilling his cum all over her breasts and thighs. 

“Ughh, fuck baby,” Folio pants, bracing himself against her shoulder. She’s spent for the moment. Her head hangs low while her body collapses. “I’ll get a towel.” “Leave it,” I order Folio. "I love the sight of her so fucking wrecked." I slip out of my pants and briefs and shamelessly stand before as she slowly raises her head and looks at me, following her eyes as they rake over my body. The soaking up the the ink covering my skin and I don't miss the way the corners of her mouth slightly turn up and her tongue passes over her lips like she knows she's about to taste something delicious. What I’m about to give her will leave a bitter craving in her mouth that she’ll never be able to get enough of. “Look at me,” I order, pulling her head up by the hair with one hand while the other one pumps my shaft. 

The look in her eyes is mesmerizing. It's soft yet strong and intoxicating making me feel like I could drown in her very existence. "My turn, Princess." "You're turn Sebastian," she echo's swallowing hard. Carefully, I drag my eyes over her face, studying her features and seeing things about her I never have before. "How did are you so beautiful?" My forehead creases. "How did you get so gorgeous?" I can't help but snicker, making her smile. "I've always loved your smile," tracing her lips with my thumb. "I've always loved your eyes." Now I'm the one smiling.

I lean down and kiss her, surprised when I feel her kiss me back. "So you do like what you see, don't you?” She remains quiet, but her expression is very readable.  “Yeah, you do. I know you do,” I grin. “Does the mask make you wet, pretty girl? Does it make the inside of your thighs shake and your pussy clench at the thought of me spreading you open wide and taking you, giving you all of me, right down to the very base of my cock.” 

"Jesus, Noah," she groans, swallowing hard again. I shake my head. "No baby. His face might be on my back, but it's me whose in your presence now. I can be your god if you want though," I tease her. The quiet little whimpers that leave her are enough for me. "Worship me, Princess. And I promise you when I claim your sweet pussy as mine, I'll worship it and make you feel like a queen." A strained cry leaves her.

I message my cock, milking as much pre-cum out of it as I can, letting it seep onto my fingers. “Open up,” I order her, bringing my fingers to her mouth, and she obeys immediately, allowing me to slip my fingers in. I watch in awe as she sucks them, using her tongue to scrap herself off my skin and swallow. "What the fuck," I mutter, shaking my head. "You’re such a fucking tease,” humming so low it comes out in almost a growl. “Alright, Princess,” I say giving my shaft a few quick pumps, as I stand over of her.

“If you can use that sweet mouth of yours to suck my fingers then I’m going to use it to fuck my cock until my cum is hitting you in the back of throat and dripping down your chin," bringing my hand to the back of her head. She looks up at me and leans in, closing her eyes the moment her lips part around my cock and she slowly begins to sink down on it, taking me gently in her mouth. Her tongue glides down the backside of it, and I sigh, throwing my hands to my face.

“Oh fucking god,” I gasp. My eyes flutter closed over the sensation her mouth brings me and I bite my knuckle, choking back so many moans as she works her tongue fearlessly against my cock, giving the veins and grooves plenty of attention. Glancing down, our eyes meet. Her deep, magnet stare pierces the armor on my heart, and straight away I’m feeling things for her that I never did before. My stomach tightens, every muscle in my body tenses. My breathing grows shaky and it suddenly feels like the room is spinning. 

“Yeah, just like that,” I say on an exhale, watching her parted lips slide up and down my cock. I’m engulfed in a wet heat that keeps growing the more she sucks and hollows out her cheeks, urging me to force her head down closer to the base of my shaft. She swirls and circles it with her tongue, flicking the tip and sucking the pre-cum that seeps out. “Holy shit, baby,” I gasp, pulling back from her mouth a bit. But my eyes remain fixed on her, loving the way she closes her eyes and hums as she works my dick, sucking and taking care of me. 

“Ughh, you look so fucking beautiful with my cock in you mouth. You feel so damn good, god!” I praise her through clenched teeth. My hands move around and cup her face then snake to the back of her head again, entangling my fingers in her hair. I'm ready to use her in the most degrading way possible to get what I want.

“Fuck, baby, I need more. Suck me harder, baby, faster. That's it!" My pace is suddenly brutal as I pound into her mouth. The fact that her hands are tied together and can’t touch me makes me have to work twice as hard and be aggressive with her in order to get what I want.

“That’s it, god, fuck yes take it all baby, take it all,” moaning loudly and pressing deeper into her mouth. The tip of my cock hits the back of her throat and she gags, but I don't stop. I keep thrusting in and out of her mouth, keeping her right where I want her until I can hear her choked moans. “You’re such a dirty girl, baby, allowing me and Folio to do this to you. But you like it don’t you? Huh?” She gags again, saliva once again, sliding down her chin and dripping on her thighs. 

“Fuck yeah you do. You like to get fucked rough don’t you? You like it when I degrade you and make you feel dirty, don’t you?” I growl, panting from the burning tension building up inside me. She’s in tears, makeup running down her face and looking absolutely fucked out of her mind. “Shit, I’m not going to last much longer!” I mutter, holding her face close to my cock, pushing her harder against me. With each thrust, I feel myself flex against her tongue. I’m almost there. “Harder baby, suck it harder. Just like that! Yeah, god yes. Make me cum for you, Princess. Show me how much you want it.” 

I can’t breath, can’t concentrate on anything other but her hungry mouth fucking my cock. “Baby, fuck, I can’t,” my voice is husky and strained. I look back down at her and at the sight of her hollowed, tear stained cheeks below. The sight of her is fucking perfect, just what I want. With a loud groan and one more hard thrust into her mouth, I explode a hot wave of cum inside her mouth, hitting the back of her throat, no doubt. My hips jerk violently as she continues to suck, swallowing every drop.

“Shit baby, swallow me!” I cry out, panting heavily, I release my grip on her hair and pull out of her mouth as she slumps over where she’s kneeling. My heart is racing wildly in my chest and I feel a mixture of pain and pleasure pulsing through me. 

“Fuck Noah! What the fuck was that?” Folio scolds me, kneeling down before her. He lifts her head, wiping her mouth with his shirt. “That,” I pant while adjusting the mask, “that was the best fucking head I’ve ever had, Folio! If that’s what she gives you every time….fuck man.” Looking at her, I'm starting to think maybe I went a little too far, that maybe I was wrong about being so forceful. “Princess, are you alright?” I ask as Folio helps her up off the floor.

Her hesitation makes me worry, bringing those feelings from before back into play. I hurt her. Again, but physically this time. I just wanted to feel her on me, but never hurt her. “I’m good,” she admits, raising her face to look at me, but I don't believe her for one second. Her makeup is smeared, traces of it running down her face or smudged around her eyes. But she's still so unbelievably beautiful. “I just want to shower.”

 “We’re not done yet, you know that, right?”  She smiles as Folio undoes her restraints. “Of course we’re not. You promised to do sick, perverted things to me, remember?” She grins like the devil himself, following Folio into the bathroom, leaving me to myself with her last words hanging in the air like heavy rain clouds right before the storm.

What the hell am I supposed to do now?

“That's it, lose yourself in me baby,” I coax her, slipping a finger inside her,  salivating over how wet and warm she is. “Oh my god, Noah,” she pants and cries out beneath me. Her legs are wide open for me as she grinds her wet cunt hard against my hand while my fingers are trapped inside her, fucking her walls and feeling how they clench then loosen around them. If she feels this fucking good on my fingers I can’t even imagine what she’ll feel like wrapped around my cock. 

Folio is standing beside me watching intently as I penetrate his girl with one of my long tattoo fingers, reaching places inside he never can. “Oh fuck, Noah,” she whimpers, bucking her hips. “Don't stop, please. That, right there,” she moans. “Yeah, is that the spot, Princess?” I add another finger, and thrust in and up, and she cries out, grabbing my wrist. “Yeah that's the spot, isn't it Folio?” I peer up at him and he just watches in eagerness. He's glued to the way she's moaning and working herself against my fingers. “It's different on that end isn't it?” 

Folio clenches his jaw, grinding his teeth. “Really fucking different. Shit,” he agrees, balling his hands into tight fists. Her fingers find her clit and, without shame, she begins to rub it in a weak attempt to get herself off. “No, move your hand,” I growl, pushing it away, frustrated with her for wanting to deny me the gratification. But she grabs my fingers, hooking her hand around my wrist. “If you want me to cum, then use your mouth, Noah. I want to watch you eat me.” 

Her eyes shift over to Folio and I don't miss how enthralled he is. “You're enjoying this way too much," he tells her. "Are you jealous, Nicky?" Folio raises his brows in surprise. "Maybe I am. I've watched another man invade your body enough already." Her expression softens. Arching her head back to capture him in a slow, soft kiss, she smiles weakly. “I remember one time you said you would love to be on the other end, watching someone else pleasure me.” He tries to hide his embarrassed grin. “I did say that, didn't I?” 

“Yeah, you did,” running her finger down his black mask covered cheek and then turning her attention back to me. I stare at her blankly through the eye holes of my mask, wondering just where in the hell this new found confidence she has has come from. “You heard me,” she says, to me, voice thick with authority. I swallow hard. “Tell me again, Princess. Tell me what you want me to do.” My eyes are glued to hers and suddenly I’m starving for her, yearning to taste her.

She sits up, bringing her partially covered breasts, that smell of Folio's dried cum, closer to my face. They look so luscious and soft. Resisting the urge to slip my tongue down and in the valley between them is proving to be impossible. She raises my face to look at her. “Eyes up her, Sebastian,” she smirks.

“Last name basis now? That's three of four times you've called me by my last name,” I grumble, looking down below as two of my fingers disappear inside her again. She moans and grinds her core against them. “We both know that's not your last name,” she mutters, sitting back against the couch, watching my hand, too. I raise my eyes to hers. “What do you want from me, Princess?” I thrust my fingers up inside her, twisting and curling them slowly while pinching her clit. Her desperate moans fill the empty silence around us as her hips rock involuntarily, 

She runs her hand down my cloth face, staring at me in the mask as if studying me. I sit up on my knees meeting her lips as she grabs the bottom of the mask to pull me in closer. My hands snake around her face as she continues to attack my lips and my tongue, slipping her kisses down my neck and jawline. “Goddammit,” I sigh as her lips glide over my skin. “Fuck, Princess. What do you want from me?” She brings her forehead to mine. “I want you to eat me, Sebastian. Fuck me with your mouth and make me cum in your mouth” she begs against my lips, licking them with her tongue. My cock throbs and twitches between my legs. My knees weaken the more I resist her. “Not until you say, please,” I order in a throaty voice. Her answer comes out in a warm, shaky breath.  “Please, Sir.” 

Motherfucker. 

Digging my fingers deep into her tender skin, hoping it’ll leave bruises, I grab her thighs with force and yank her down until her ass is hanging off the couch. “You want me to eat out this pretty little cunt of yours, Princess?” I taunt, my words soft but the words intentionally rough. “Tongue fuck you until you beg me to let you cum? Is that what you want?” She nods quickly, biting her lip. “Use your words, baby,” I huff, positioning myself in the right place.

“Yes, Noah please,” she begs, reaching over and placing her hand on the back of my head. I allow her to guide me down between her thighs. Her pussy is swollen yet still soaked and glistening from my fingers being inside her and I can smell her as I kiss the insides of her thighs, feeling her body jerk. “Easy, baby,” I say soothingly. I’m aching to taste her, dying to have her bud between my teeth. I look up at her and she’s pleading with me through her eyes. Lifting both of her legs, I lay them on each of my shoulders, positioning myself perfectly at her core, and pepper the inside of it with kisses. My breath fans over her sensitive clit and she whines desperately, pathetically.

“When you’re with him, remember how hard I made you cum tonight. When you let Folio between you legs, remember the shape of my tongue deep inside you and the feeling of my mouth against your cunt long after tonight,” I whisper. She’s breathless beneath my touch as soon as I dive into her core, licking her clit slowly and running a finger through her slit. I don’t hesitate to insert two fingers, feeling her arch up off the couch, clawing the sofa cushion.

“Such a fucking perfect pussy, pretty girl.” I mumble against her sex, savoring the taste of her precum. I flick her bud with my tongue, licking her up and back, then drag my covered nose aggressively up and her slit. With no shame at all, she grinds against my face, letting a long, low moan go as I devour her. “Oh God," she whines, loud and clear. "Noah, that feels so good,” she moans. “So fucking good,” panting between her short whines. Her cries become repetitive, her pants become erratic. “She’s close,” Folio says standing over me, watching me eat his girlfriend out. Only his eyes and mouth can be seen. 

“Keep doing what you’re doing, especially with your fingers. She loves being eaten and fucked at the same time.” Instantly, I stop and sit back, wiping my mouth with the back of my hand as I look up at Folio. His brown eyes are on fire with wanting her again, and the moment she looks at him that fire spreads over his entire face. She looks from Folio to me and her eyes tell me everything that she's afraid to say. “Why don’t you do it?” I suggest keeping my eyes locked with hers. They light up in the most beautiful yet demented way.

“What?” “You use your fingers, Folio. I’ll keep using my mouth and together we’ll make her cum. This is what this whole night’s about, right Princess? Reconciliation between the three of us?” My tone is rough and husky, and I have no clue what Folio is thinking right now. He leans down and kisses her hard, whispering something in her ear. She grins, bites her lip, (fuck she really needs to stop biting that lip) and nods. Folio kisses her again and then looks down at me. 

“Alright, Noah, let’s violate her together,” he agrees as an animalistic expression overtakes his eyes. “Let’s make her cum together.” I say nothing, only shift my body to give him some room as he gets on his knees beside me. She looks down at the two of us and just stares for a moment. Her expression is soft and wistful and I melt when she reaches down and caresses the fabric covering my cheek. I can still feel her touch and it sets my skin ablaze. She does the same to Folio, and he takes a quick breath and leans into her touch. 

I can’t wait any longer. I pry my eyes off her and dive right back into her core, licking and sucking all of her that I can. She throws her head back, arching her back slightly, pushing her pussy harder into my face. My cock twitches and I moan, unable to get enough of her.  Folio slips two fingers at a time inside her once I sit back, plunging deep into her slippery cunt. He works his fingers against her inner walls, twisting and turning his wrist, and pulling out only to slip back in while rubbing her clit with his thumb. 

Her sweet little cries quickly become needy, filthy noises as her lips spill desperate curses. Watching Folio finger fuck her is something I never thought I’d get off on. What we’re doing is sick, but fuck, it feels so fucking good. “Nicky,” she pants. “Nicky, I’m so close baby,” crying out and grabbing his wrist. “Do you want Noah to finish you? You’re so fucking tight, I know you’re close.” She quickly nods, but whimpers as soon as he slides his fingers out of her. Before he gets up, he pushes her legs apart until they’re wide open, exposing her entire core to both of us. “Oh, fuck,” I groan at the sight.

“She’s beautiful, isn’t she?” Folio says, glancing from her wet core to her face. He leans down and runs his tongue ever her entrance, licking her as if she’s candy on a stick. “Oh god, Nicky, please,” she whines, begging as she's reaching for him. Folio shakes his head, standing to his feet. “Nope, Noah’s going to finish you, sweetheart.” He glances at me, expression darkened with emotion. 

Lifting both her legs and resting them on my shoulders again, her thighs locked tight around my head, keeping me right where she wants me as I work my tongue over and deeper into her delicious pussy, lapping up her juices. Her hands snake over the back of my head and tug at the mask, never getting enough of the way she pushes my face harder into her pussy that’s soaked in a mixture of my spit and her arousal. “Do you see the way I need you, Noah,” she whispers, rolling her hips against my face. “You only want me right now, because of how I’m making you feel, Princess, but you don’t need; you’ve never needed me.” The slow deep strokes of my tongue pull more sounds from her I never could have imagined. I begin to move with her, working her tight cunt with my tongue, but I need more. My cock needs more. 

I lower her legs and stand up, pulling her to her feet. “What’s happening, Noah? What are you doing?” she asks, anxiously. I pick her up and throw her over my shoulder, not surprised by how light she is. “This is going to be cold,” I tell her, sitting her down on the table. She gasps. “Fuck that’s cold.” “Told you,” I smirk. She just glares at me. I undo the clasp of her bra, throw it on the floor and push her down, laying her on her back, while taking a few steps back, looking at her all spread out on the table, completely naked and vulnerable. 

“Jesus, Noah, what are you doing?” Folio appears beside me and we both stare at her. She purposely lets her legs fall open, exposing everything to both of us, and I grind my teeth while shaking my head. “Does she do this with you?” Folio grins, watching the smile creep over her face as she dances her hand around her hard nipples and glistening pussy. “Every fucking time. She’s a tease, a temptress, but fuck me… she’s perfect.” Folio’s voice catches in the back of his throat and he clears it. “I love her, Noah. I’m so fucking in love with her that the thought of loosing her keeps me up at night sometimes. I'm scared she’ll leave me for someone better?” I huff a laugh.

“You’re crazy. There’s no one better for her than you, Folio.” “Yeah there is, there’s you.” My body tenses. I shake my head fiercely. “No, you're wrong. I’m not good for her, Nick. I’m everything she doesn’t deserve. I’m too toxic for her. You’re good to her. You’re everything she needs and more.” We both stare at her, watching as she sits up on her elbows, throwing her head back.

“She’s never never gonna give you up, Folio. You have her heart; completely.” I pat him on the shoulder then leave him, closing the gap between me and her. “You’re impossible,” I chide her, running my finger up her slit and inserting it inside her. Her hands wrap around my wrist, pushing me further into her and I feel my middle finger hit that soft, spongy spot, causing her to sit up and moan, clenching her jaw.

“Oh, you like that, huh?” I tease her. She nods rapidly, squeezing her eyes closed. “Fuck, Noah,” she breaths, staring into my eyes. She's so close to me, I can feel her warm breath on my lips. “You’re so fucking beautiful, Princess. I shouldn’t have been so cruel to you. God! I’m so fucking sorry.” She pulls me into her and attacks my lips, nipping them before our tongues crash together. Hers slides over mine, breathing into my mouth. 

I push her back down and grab her hips, pulling her down closer to my cock. “I just want to get my tip wet,” I tell her as her eyes grow wide. I’m not ready for you to cum on my cock yet, baby. I still need to make you cum in my mouth. But I just want to see how this feels,” I mutter, encircling my tip around her clit. “Ah, oh god,” she softly cries, watching me as I begin to tease her. 

“Fuck, Noah, you’re a lot bigger,” she gasps when I push into her entrance with the crown of my cock. “Damn, baby," I groan. Just her entrance alone feels heavenly. I drive the head in and out of her pussy, teasing her to the point that she’s a writhing mess beneath me. “Noah,” she pants, throwing her hands over her face, dragging them down slowly. 

“Noah, I,” she moans as I push into her again, making me grunt. “Ah, fuck, please, Noah, make me cum. I need it so badly,” she pleads with a whine. “Okay, Princess, since you said please.” I drop to my knees and hold her legs up, instantly diving into her and begin to devour her pussy like a starving man. I probe her opening with my tongue, drawing a shudder out of her. 

I pushed further into her, curling my tongue inside her as I seal my mouth against her wet lips, sucking and working my face hard against her. “That’s, ohhh, f-fuck Noah!” Her breathing is erratic and her cries are louder. I raise my head, but replace my mouth with my fingers and slide them in and out fast and hard. “Don’t fucking fight it, Princess. Don’t fight how fucking much you want to cum for me.” Her eyes meet mine and I see that aroused flicker in them.   

I dive back down into her pussy, continuing to fuck her with my tongue and finger, knowing how close she is. I moan against her core. I can’t get enough of the way she tastes, the way she smells. Her sex is addictive and I just want to die right here between her thighs. She’s so sinfully delicious I never want to stop. “Oh god, don’t stop. Fff-fuck, Noah!” she cries. “I’m so close, don’t stop.” “Cum for me baby. Feed me. I’ll swallow all of you.” I beg, digging my fingertips deeper into her thighs.

Finally her orgasm explodes in my mouth, ripping through her savagely. She rides my face all through her release just like she did for me earlier, willingly lapping her entire mess. But this satisfies nothing in me. It’s not enough. I want more. I want to penetrate her insides, violate every part of her until I have her crying, screaming, and begging me to stop. I want her pathetically at my mercy Fuck! I need to fuck her hard; now.

I climb to my feet and before she even has time to recover, I grab her arm and throw her over my shoulder again, grabbing the rope as I make my way to the bedroom, tossing her on the bed once there, climbing up behind her. Folio enters, watching as I get on my knees and shove her down into the mattress to tie her up. “What are you doing to her, Noah,” he asks hesitantly. I can hear the worry in his voice. “I’m restraining her again,” I answer calmly.

“Why?” "Because I want too and because I can." I slip my arm under her and lift her ass up higher. It’s pale and beautiful, like a porcelain trinket you shouldn’t touch because it might break. Well, fuck that. I raise my hand and slap her ass cheek, groaning the instant she shrieks. “You like that, don’t you Princess. I knew you would. I know you like it rough.” I do it again, this time to the other side. Her moan echoes through the room. “Goddammit, Noah, what the fuck!” Folio cries. 

The sight of her face down and ass up awakens the inner monster in me, bringing out the depraved hunger in me of wanting to see her squirm and writhe beneath the force of my desire. “But she likes it. Don’t you baby?” She whimpers, but answers that she does. Her confession surprises Folio. “You like Noah being rough with you; tying you up and spanking you?” “Yes,” she quickly admits. 

Folio steps over to the bed, looking down at his girlfriend in the position that she’s in. Even through the mask, I can see a deep craving settle in his eyes. “Come on, Folio. I know you have it in you. That one night in the kitchen when you had her over the kitchen table was insane. Don’t deny it felt great.”

He glances at me with a darkened look. “You wanna feel his hand on your ass again?” he teases, running his hand over the smooth red skin of her ass cheek.

He leans down and kisses the redness, softly gliding his lips, tongue, and the tip of his nose over her skin and making her shudder. A soft moan slips past her lips, making my cock twitch. I’m swollen hard again and in need of a desperate release. “I want to feel yours, baby, she whines, practically begging him for it. 

Folio doesn’t bother to answer. He just raises his hand and lets it come down with a loud slap. She screams, followed by another ungodly moan and Folio groans, throwing his head back while palming his cock. “Feels fucking good, doesn’t it,” I chuckle, gloating in the fact that I was right and he knows it. He looks over at me, but doesn’t say anything. His eyes say it all; he’s turned on by her pain.

“You want it rough baby? You want me to make it hurt?” he growls, letting his hand come down on her again. “Fuck, Nicky,” she cries, burying her face in the mattress. Folio’s afraid he’s hurt her. He kneels down at the side of the bed, brushing hair out of her eyes. She shakes her head at whatever he says to her and slides his hand into one of hers that’s still loosely bound behind her, squeezing it and kissing her on the lips before standing back up, taking his mask off. 

“I know I told you anything goes, but I swear to god Noah, if you hurt her in any way that makes her feel uncomfortable,” “I won’t, I promise, Nick. You should know that. I love her.” His eyes grow wide. “Don’t look surprised. You and I both know you’re not. You’ve known for a long time.” “Why do you think I suggested this?” I nod. “I’m just not used to hearing you say it.”

I run my hand gently over her bottom, over the red welted hand prints of both mine and Folio’s and notice how her body cringes from my touch. It strikes an ache in my heart. “It’s not going to change anything though, Noah, you know that, right? None of this will. After tonight, you and her will have your shit worked out and she and I can finally move on together; finally bury the past.” I look back down at her and run my hand up her spine, only to feel her skin prickle from my touch.  

“But it does, Folio. It changes everything even if it’s only for tonight. I don’t think she’s going to want to give me up that easily after tonight, and I’m not sure if I’ll be able to either.” “You have no choice, Noah. She’s mine.” Without another word, Folio walks off, heading towards the bathroom. 

“Noah,” she calls to me softly. I climb onto the bed behind her and wrap my arm around her waist, lifting her up to her knees. I lean over her back to kiss the side of her face, but she turns her head quick enough for our lips to collide.

The heat that engulfs us is overwhelming. I can’t stop the way my tongue immediately consumes the inside of her mouth tasting what remains of my cum from earlier or the way my hands snake around her throat, fingers trailing covetously over her skin. She whimpers quietly beneath my kiss and my touch. “I think you liked being spanked by me a little too much, didn’t you.” She shakes her head, but I reach under her and feel her warm, soaked cunt.

“Lier,” I whisper in her ear. You wanna feel my hand on your ass again? You want it to hurt?” Her muffled moan is the only answer I need. I spank her again, harder this time and she bucks, screaming into the mattress. “I knew you like it rough.” “Maybe I do,” she fires back, choking back a moan, “but I hate fucking mind games, Noah!” 

Her words hit me in the chest like a gut punch to the stomach. “You fucked with my head for so long and now you’re fucking with my heart, and I can’t handle it anymore.” “I know, okay! I know the things I did to you, the mind games I played with you were wrong. And I know that what we’re doing now is wrong! I'm sorry! Okay! I’m fucking sorry.” I can’t breathe. My chest is so tight and I feel like the walls are closing in on me. 

I hear her breath catch in the back of her throat as she chokes back a sob. “I just fucking wanted you so much, Princess, but I was scared you didn't want me,” I confess no longer caring how desperate or pathetic I sound to her. 

Unable to control the urge, I slide one of my fingers deep into her cunt, feeling how drenched in arousal she is as she clenches around me, making me groan in an aching neediness to possess her. “I thought that I wasn’t good enough for you. I thought that if I was mean enough to you it would change how my heart felt about you.”

Folio walks back into the room, and I can feel his eyes on my back but I no longer care about him or his feelings. I only care about one thing right now; the woman in my arms. This is our moment. This is where we work our shit out. We’ll just fuck it out of each other until neither one of us is in pain anymore. “And did it work?” she asks, barely above a whisper, gasping when I pull my finger out of her.  

“…. No. It only made me want you more,” I say without hesitation, sucking her juice off my finger. A single tear slides down her cheek, causing my heart to plummet to the pit of my stomach. “Noah, you have me right now to do whatever you want to me, to make me feel whatever, however you want.” My hand around her waist drifts to the warmth of her pussy again. She bucks her hips and moans at the feeling of my hand all over her soaked cunt, my long fingers slipping and sliding in and out of her. She feels so fucking good. 

“Jesus,” I pant, licking my dry lips. I'm rutting against her ass like a pathetic animal in heat, looking for any way to satisfy the aching swelling of my cock. “I don't want to hurt you.” “Then don’t. But I can take a little more just this last time. So fuck me like you mean in Noah. Fuck me like you’ll never have me again, because you won’t.”

Her words are a blow to my heart, one that I fully deserve. But I’m too overwhelmed with a need to be inside her to care about that right now. All I want to do now is do what she told me to do; fuck her like I mean it. I raise her up until her back is against my chest and her hands graze the side of my cock, making me buck against her. 

Wrapping me giant hands around her small breasts, I squeeze them vigorously like a depraved mad man shifting my long body awkwardly around just to take part of one in my mouth. I devour as much of it as I can from the angle I'm at, taking her pebbled nipple between my teeth and suck on it. Her labored breathing has me sitting back and her head falling against my shoulder. 

Running my hands over her sides, I slide them up and over her nipples. Her breath hitches as she inhales and I can hear the quiet moans that leave her every time I drag the middle of my palms over the pebbled flesh, pinching them hard between my thumb and finger. She thrusts her ass against me, rutting my cock

She’s pathetic, desperate, and needy, yet beautiful, resilient, and irresistible. I’m obsessed with her. Taking her breasts fully into my hands, I knead the warm flesh feeling the aching and throbbing in my balls from the need to have my cock buried inside her. Our breathing together escalates until we’re both panting and writhing in each other's arms. 

“Fuck me,” she whimpers, running her lips over my jaw line. “I need you in me. I want you, Noah.” “I should make you say please,” I say, my voice husky and dry. She moans when I pinch her nipples and rubs her ass against my cock again. “Dammit Noah, just stop talking and fuck me,” she seethes.

“Fuck,” I hiss, “but I like you desperate and demanding, so fucking needy,” I growl. I let her go and shove her back down on the mattress, lifting her ass up again and positioning where I want her. I grab the base of her neck, pressing down to hold her firm against the mattress and align my cock up to her entrance. “Say it again, Princess,” I order, this time with as much aggression that I can pull out of me.

“Fuck me, Noah, please.” “Louder!” “Noah,” she softly cries. “So Folio can hear it, Princess.” “God! Fuck me Noah. I want you to fuck me!” I look over at Folio, and he’s sitting on the couch, watching us intently. But the second his eyes glance over me, he lowers his head, throwing his hands over top. “I’m going to ruin the fuck out of you, Princess.”

“Then ruin me.”

Fuck. 

Everything falls apart after that. My erratic hunger takes control of my senses, blurring the lines between respecting or degrading her body. I told her I don't want to hurt her, but that doesn’t mean I won't.

In the mask, I’ve become someone else; a bolder, darker me. It’s the version that takes over my mind at night when I’m all alone and sexual hunger is the only thing I can think about.  It’s the version of me I’ve never let anyone see; until now. 

I drive the head of my cock into her entrance, seeing that I really am a lot bigger than her tight hole. I take a moment to stretch her some, in and out slowly so I don’t hurt her too much. But the further in I go, the harder it is to come back out. I want to stay in her, sink all the way into her until her ass and my groin are inseparable. 

“The first time I touched you, you were so wet for me, soaked in your arousal.” I run my hand up her back, feeling her shudder, pressing harder into her. Her cries are alluring. “Then I heard you moan when you had my dick in your mouth and you swallowed every drop of my cum like a good little slut that you are.” I slowly fuck into her, forcing my cock deeper into her. “Fuck, Noah!” she cries. 

Folio’s watching us, eyes staring hard at me, about to fully fuck his girlfriend I pull out of her, feeling her legs trembling. “Spread your legs, Princess. I want to see.” My voice is like gravel, filled with lust. I’m aching so badly, my hardened cock throbbing from the slow torture even more than before. 

With her ass raised high and legs spread apart, her pussy is very visible to me. It's pink and glistening wet with her arousal I dip the tip of my cock inside her again, just to see her reaction and she pushes back instantly, rutting against it like I knew she would. “Your pussy is aching for me right now,” I mutter, thrusting my tip against her entrance. “You want it baby, well then here you go.”

With one hard vicious thrust, I enter her, letting her neck go and grabbing her hips as I pull back and give her another single, wild and aggressive thrust that makes her scream my Noah. “That’s it, Princess, scream my name,” I coax her. Another thrust. Fuck! “Holy shit, baby, your pussy feels so fucking good around me! Goddamn, you feel incredible. So tight, so fucking tight. Oh my god,” I growl as I start to fuck her in the true sense of the word until I find a rhythm that fits us. 

Her cries are loud and brutal, turning me on to the point I grow and grunt like a feral animal each time I slam back into her, coating my cock in her juices. “God you fucking love it like this, don’t you, Princess.” “Yes! Ughh I love it, fuck, Noah, I love it.” “Yeah, I know you are a pretty girl. You like my cock fucking you like this, filling you in ways Folio never can.” She screams my name, as I lift her ass higher, allowing me to fuck up into her deeper. I hit that soft spot inside her and she screams out my name again.

“Scream my name baby, that’s it!” I yell, plowing into her from behind. For long minutes, the only sound is our heavy breathing, the creaking of the bed, and the slapping of flesh hitting flesh. I’m desecrating her like I wanted to, with the depravity of my mind and body, imprinting the shape of my cock into her cunt. She won’t ever be able to forget how I feel inside her. “Louder! Scream fucking louder for me,” I growl out through clenched teeth. Her desperate moans turn into a scream, but it’s still not good enough. 

“We both know you can be louder than that, baby.” I raise my other hand and let it come down hard on her ass, smacking the pail skin again, marking a favorite spot on her that I love. It earns me the sound I’ve been looking for. “There it is! God-fucking- dammit,” I growl again, “Noah,” she pants, moaning louder. “Right there,” she cries out. “Don’t stop! Right there!” I can feel her pussy clenching my cock, telling me she’s about to cum.

“You’re nothing but a fucking little whore for me, aren’t you, Princess. You’ll let me fuck you however I want, especially if I can make that pretty pink pussy cum all over my tongue or my cock. Am I right, baby,” I growl, lifting her ass up higher to fuck her at a different angle; deeper and rougher. “Jesus, Noah!” she screams, as I find a different rhythm and position to fuck her brutally, shoving her thighs further apart as I’m hammering harder into her pussy. “Fuck,” I murmur, panting. “Fuck you’re gonna make me cum.” 

She’s gasping and crying, moaning my name over and over. “Noah,” she whimpers. “Say it again, Princess,” I growl, plunging deep into her pussy. “Fuck! Noah!” she gasps. “Who’s fucking you, baby,” grunting through another thrust. “Oh god!” she cries when I hit her g-spot. “You are, Noah. You are!” 

I grab her hair and yank her back against me. Her hands are still bound and her tangled fingers hit my chest as I lock her hip between me and the mattress. I pull out of her soaking wet cunt only to slam back in with deep force, tangling my hands into her hair even more. I let out a strained moan repeating the hard thrust again, feeling her reaction against it. “You can take it! I know you can!”

Another loud moan rips through her, echoing in the room. It’s the very thing I need to push harder into and begin to truly fuck her like she deserves; fast and relentlessly. 

Folio slips the black ski mask on and watches us from across the room, seated in the comfort of the gray couch that’s pushed up against the wall. Moments ago I watched him finger fuck her as I at her out until she came all over my face. It was so pornographic, deranged and fucked up what he and I did to her at the same time but holy fuck was it satisfying. It made every desire of possessing her mind and body come alive, fully waking the demon I’d been trying so hard to keep away. 

I can tell Folio doesn’t like what I’m doing to his girl. He’s on edge, gripping the edge of the couch so hard, his veins clearly visible in his arms and hands. 

“What’s wrong, Folio? Don’t you like what you see? Listen to her! She sounds so beautiful, just like this morning,” I taunt him, using the girl below me for my pleasure alone. She’s trying to hold out and not cum, but at the pace I’m fucking her at, she won’t last much longer. I feel the familiar build up in my groin, telling me I won’t wither. My grunts are abundant, my breathing is heavy.

Spitting on my fingers, I reach around and find that spot of her clit and rub it, knowing fully well it’s all she needs to push her over the edge. “Oh god, Noah, fuck! Noah, don’t stop, please don’t stop.” Folio stands before her, completely wrecked from everything he’s watching. He says nothing, just silently watches as his girlfriend comes apart for me.

“You wanna cum, pretty girl?” “Yeah, Noah, please,” she begs. I kiss her shoulder and give her the okay. “Alright, then cum for me baby. Cum so I can spill myself all over you!” Finally, her pussy gives in and she explodes around my cock, screaming my name as she does. Her body is trembling as I continue fucking her through her orgasm, feeling that same familiar pressure.

“Shit, goddammit Princess, I’m about to cum, f-fuck!” I growl thrusting hard into her one more time, ripping the black ski mask off, before pulling out and shoving her body back down on the mattress, spilling my seed over her ass and lower back. Completely out of breath I look up at Folio and grin wickedly at him before collapsing over top of her.

“I had the whole damn world and I gave it all away/What did I think I would save?/For better or for worse, this is my burden to take'/Cause I'm the only one to blame/You're so much better off/With nothing but memories”

-The Fountain-

“Do you know how good it feels to have you lying here so vulnerable in my arms?” Her words cut my heart wide open. I close my eyes, absorbing the feeling of her fingertips caressing the skin of my face, over my lips, and down my neck. I slip a hand beneath her head and raise her up to meet my mouth, kissing her gently, slowly as our tongues massage one another’s. 

A chill runs over my body from her hands running down my back and over my ass, making me shiver. My body is laying over top of hers. She has one leg locked around one of mine while I have her other one spread out and my knee gently pressed against her core. She’s tired, exhausted, and spent from everything that Folio and I have put her through. 

I’ve disposed of the mask, no longer hiding behind the face of anger. I’m unguarded, a complete open book for her now and I’m terrified. I’ve never let her see me like this and I’m not sure how I feel about it. I kiss her again, taking my time to taste every part of her mouth and tongue that I can. As I stare into her soft eyes, I no longer see the resentment for me in them. I only see love and compassion. What changed? I’ve been horrible to her for the last few hours, hurting her, degrading her, saying vile and mean things to her and yet, she’s right here beneath me, even though she doesn’t belong to me. 

“So give me something beautiful/So give me something else/I need another miracle/I really need some help, I need a miracle”

-Miracle

“I’m sorry. I’m so, so sorry.” My apology catches her off guard. She frowns, expression ridden with confusion. “I was stupid and inconsiderate of you, of your heart. I tried to blame everything on you and I hurt you so badly.” I try to breathe through the panic rising in my chest, but it’s hard to. “Noah, don’t,” she says, closing her eyes.

“I know, I know, I’m not, fuck! God, this is painful.” I drop my head to her chest, and she sweetly presses me against her. My cheek lays partially on her breast, close enough to her nipple. I rub the end of my nose against it and I feel her hum in approval, and then I lick it, swirling around it with the tip of my tongue. She sighs, moaning softly and arching her back a little, encouraging me to take the whole thing into my mouth. 

Gently sucking her tit, my fingers find her pussy, and knowing it so well now, I slip two fingers inside her, sliding them over her inner walls, so wet and warm; still. I fuck her cunt slowly and as sweetly as I can, watching the mix of expressions that wash over her beautiful face. “Noah, what are you doing,” she breaths while I attack her neck with kisses, slightly covered with small purple bruises. “What does it feel like I'm doing? It doesn’t hurt does it?

She softly moans, shaking her head when my thumb circles her clit. She digs her nails into my biceps. That's when I notice her tears. Her eyes are shut tight, but the proof of hurt slides down the sides of her face. “Hey, look at me,” nudging her face with mine. Her eyes open. They're glazed over with tears. My eyes dart between hers, trying to find the answers I'm looking for. Her fingers find my lips and I kiss their tips.

“I waited you out, Noah. I waited until I hit the bottom.” “But I drowned you out, didn't I?” She doesn't say anything, just pulls me down and slips her tongue in my mouth, kissing me like she needs all the air in my lungs. “Why did you pretend not to notice? Not to care? You saw the pain and the confusion in me. You knew you were hurting me. Why didn't you stop? We could've been together, Noah. This could've been our life.” 

Watching her tears fall is destroying me. Every teardrop is a stab to the chest that cuts open the wound that I realize has never healed. “I don't know,” is the only answer I can give her. I can't look her in the eyes any longer, so I turn away, digging into my eyes with my thumb and index finger. “You were good enough, Noah, for me. You were everything I wanted. And I wanted you so fucking bad. I needed you and you just fucking left me.” “I know, okay,” I snap, weeping softly. The pain I feel is too much. I don’t want to feel it anymore. 

“I know what I did to you, and I have to fucking live with that choice for the rest of my life.” Slipping my hands around her face, I sit up and pull her into my lap. Nothing else around us seems to exist right now. I’m lost in the brokenness I feel, lost in the idea of what could’ve been, but what is at the moment just for a few more hours. Right now, she’s mine; only mine. I don’t care about what comes later. 

I’m hard for her again. I want to feel her cum on my cock one more time, but this time I want to watch her. “Noah,” she whispers, her breath shaky and weak. I slide my fingers through her folds and she’s already soaked. I lift her slightly, aligning her pussy with cock and shove myself into her, feeling instant gratification. “Uh, fuck, I like this position,” I sigh as she smiles with a light laugh and starts thrusting herself hard into me. “Noah, oh, damn.” “Yeah, I know,” I grunt. Her pace quickens, letting me know she wants to be in control.

“You want to take over? You wanna ride me, baby?” She nod’s quickly “Yeah of course you do. Alright, come on,” I say shifting myself around without coming out of her and laying on my back. “Alright, pretty girl, ride me. Make me cum for you,” I challenge her. She grabs my hands and places them on her breasts as she begins moving up and down, working my cock inside her warm cunt. The feeling is indescribable. It makes me moan, curse, dig my fingers and nails into her thighs. “God dammit, Princess, that’s it. Fuck my cock just like that. God you’re pussy fucks me so good.” Her soft moans quickly become soft screams, which are suddenly silenced by Folio’s lips on hers. He grabs her by the hair and pulls her face back towards him, devouring her lips and her tongue. 

“Make him cum, sweetheart, so I can finally have you back.” Folio’s eyes shift to mine and as much as I want to hate him and be angry at him, I can’t. It wasn’t part of the deal. I have to give her back. She doesn’t belong to me. She turns back to me, lowering herself to kiss me, dragging her lips and tongue across the skin of my neck. Taking me hands, she holds them on either side of my head, locking her fingers tight around mine, and starts to fuck me. Slow at first, fully talking my heart forever with each bite to my neck that she takes. Then her pace quickens and she fucks me harder.

“Oh fuck, baby, don’t stop,” I tell her, staring straight into her eyes. I can feel her pussy tightening around me as my cock twitches. She’s close. With every move she’s pulling my cum closer and closer to the tip with her tightness hugging it like a warm glove.  I can’t push the feeling back any longer. The heat in my groin, the tingle in my cock, my sensitive tip, and the dead giveaway… my balls fucking ache.

“God, Princess,” I pant. I’m dying to touch her, but she still has my hands pinned down. “Is this how you fucking felt, tied up?” “Worse.” “Fuck! I’m sorry! Let me go, please. I want to touch you.” “No.” I growl. “Let me go, now!” With a few more thrusts, she lets up, releasing my arms. I gather her in my arms right as I watch her cum on my cock for the first time. The way she bites her lip, throwing her head back and milking herself by grinding so hard on my cock, is all it takes for me to reach my end. 

“I wanna cum inside you,” I pant. Still cumming herself, she clings to me and whispers in my ear “the fucking fill me, Noah.” “Holy fuck!” I cry, releasing my load inside her like she wants I squeeze her tight, burying my face in the crook of her neck, feeling her kisses on the side of my face. “I love you, Noah,” she says breathlessly. This is her goodbye. “The past is over. Let's move on. I wanna move on.” 

Kissing my lips one more time, I close my eyes as she climbs off of me, letting go me, and I fall back into the comfort of the bed. She really did let me go that easily. I’m exhausted; physically and mentally. I turn my head and see my black ski mask laying next to me. I pick it up, bring it to my face and breathe in deeply. It smells like her. I let the tears fall silently as I think about her, wondering what our lives are going to look like once the three of us leave this place. I know I won't be able to look at her the same, I won’t be able to watch her and Folio together and not feel jealous, envying him every single time he goes to bed at night. I know this love I have for her could ruin me, but I can't stop. And even if I could, would I? She and I are like fire and ice, destined to collide, but never meant to be together. 

She left me. Just like I left her. She destroyed me. Just like I destroyed her. And as I lay here alone, listening to the sounds of their love making coming from the bathroom, I suddenly feel so empty without her. Even though she was never mine, losing her broke my heart.

I'm so afraid/That the walls that I have made have locked me in/I'm not okay/But I can try my best to just pretend/So will you wait me out until I let you down?/So will you wait me out until I let you down?

Just Pretend (Acoustic)

[bellysoupset]

Posting this and running away

---------------------------------

"What is this?" Jonah chuckled, gesturing vaguely to the image in front of him. This was easily the weirdest thing he had seen in a while.

Leo was inside the bathtub, with no water, in the middle of the day, wearing just his boxers, head leaning back and scrolling in his ipad.

"Hey," the blonde turned his head slightly, voice all soft, "missed you."

How could Jon not melt around this man? He entered further in the bathroom, crouching down to kiss his fiancé and Leo grimaced and pulled back, causing Jonah to whine, "what the hell?"

"You don't wanna kiss me," Leo cringed, "I ate something weird and it messed with me. I just puked," he gestured vaguely to the closed toilet with his head. Jonah raised his eyebrows, surprised.

Leo didn't look sick... But now that Jon looked closer he could tell the sweat clinging to his temples and over his lip. Instead of pale, he was flushed in a slightly unnatural way, specially given how cold their bathroom was.

"Is that why you're in the tub?"

"Yeah, still feel pukey," Leo groaned and slid down in the tub, resting his feet on the opposite end and dropping his ipad to the side. Now that it was no longer blocking Jonah's view, he could tell his fiance's abs were slightly bloated, the usual line separating its quadrants all but faded, "I don't know what's wrong with my office, you'd think such a fancy building would have a decent catering."

Jonah grinned, collapsing down on his ass instead of staying crouched down and leaned in to push Leo's hair back, away from his sweaty forehead. The blonde let out a happy noise at the hair pet, "why don't you come to bed? You can feel sick in the bedroom, where it's comfy."

Leo snorted at that, turning his head so his cheek was pressed to the cold rim of the tub and going boneless as Jonah petted his hair, "bedroom feels too warm, was making me claustrophobic."

"And the bathtub is not?"

"You may question my methods, but not my results," Leo smiled, looking up at him and grabbing the ditched iPad, "I want a March wedding."

"Okay?" Jon moved on the bathroom floor, stripping the thick wool vest he was wearing over his shirt and removing his belt so he was more comfortable, throwing them on top of the sink, "why March?"

"Because I don't wanna wait until October next year," Leo pouted, turning on the screen. Before Jon could question why March and October were the only options, Leo said, "I made a pinterest board."

Jonah couldn't stop smiling, it was embarrassing and hurting his cheek muscles, "you made a pinterest board," he echoed, amused and endeared to hell and back. Leo glared at him, pushing the iPad in his hands.

"Stop looking at me with this stupid smile and look at the board," he tapped the screen, then curled up with a grimace and planted a hand on his stomach, pressing slightly and bringing up a sick burp, "god..."

"Should I move from the line of fire?" Jonah squinted at Leo, noticing the way he was gulping down.

The man shook his head, taking another gulp, "swallowing air," he cleared up, "not gagging."

"Counter intuitive if your stomach hurts, no?"

"Trying to burp," Leo cleared up with a strained voice, digging his fingers in his tummy, until another little sickly burp came up, "urgh, it's stuck."

"My husband, the romantic," Jonah teased him with an eyeroll, then scooted closer, "sit up, let me thump your back."

"Like a baby?" Leo snorted, but obeyed and let out a pleased noise as Jonah started doing exactly that. A couple pats in and he brought up a large, brassy belch.

"UUruorup- Fuck, that felt nice," he hung his head between his knees, breathing out in relief, "look at the board."

"Bossy," Jonah glared at the side of his head, then actually looked at the board. It was a collection of farmhouse weddings and hotels and event-centers... None of it looked very Leo, "uhm- these are the ones you liked?"

"You hate them," Leo sighed, "I don't know, everything I'm able to find is either those ultra girly things that only Wendy could like or, if I search for gay-wedding, it's like they're competing to see who can be more cringy."

Jonah cackled at the bitchiness, earning himself a smile, "this is nice," he leaned against the tub, all but sprawled on the bathroom floor and pointing a picture of a tall, reflective ballroom. Leo draped himself over the edge, squinting at the screen.

"That's a cathedral, Jonah," Leo said dryly, "I'm not gonna get married in a church, thanks."

Jon let out a scoff, "it's in your board!"

"As inspiration! Because I like-" he cut himself off with a nauseated gulp, "the-the tall ceilings..." Leo's voice trailed off and he raised a hand to his mouth, the other one darting up so Jonah could help him up.

Jon was up in a flash, grabbing Leo's hand to hoist him up and leaving the iPad on top of their sink, while the blonde fell to his knees before the toilet and gagged weakly over the water.

He cringed in sympathy as Leo retched and a thin dribble of colored in spit fell in the water, causing him to say in a thick, nauseated voice, "Oh god..." then gag once more, bringing up a mouthful of frothy, beige vomit. Jonah gulped down against the knot in his throat, forcing his gaze away and planted a hand on Leo's naked back. He was covered in cold sweat, muscles seizing under Jon's hand as he continued to heave for another five minutes.

Leo let another sickly burp, the groaned and collapsed forward, causing Jonah to scramble to grab him by the shoulter, "don't split your head open, Leo!"

"Uhhmm, wasn't gonna..." He scoffed, pressing his forehead to the cold porcelain, "I still feel so queasy..."

Jonah hit the flush, then combed his fingers through Leo's sweaty bangs, touching his cheek and forehead inconspicuously. He wasn't feverish and Leo let out a little snort, "I know what you're doing, Dr. Banks..." he blew out another soft burp, "I wanna go to bed but I'm all sweaty..."

"Couch?" Jonah suggested and Leo lifted up his head, considering it for a minute before nodding.

"Yeah okay, help me up..."

It was a bigger hassle than expected, as Leo washed his face and brushed his teeth, only for the toothbrush to send him into another gagging fit, but eventually they managed to move into the living room and Leo collapsed down on the cushions with a sigh, "Jon..."

"I know, I know," he grinned, sitting next to the man and planting his hand on his boyfriend's bloated belly, "tummy rub."

"You're the love of my life," Leo said in a pleased tone, eyes slipping closed as Jonah started rubbing his hand in a soft, gentle circle over his distended abs. It wasn't much of a massage, but he was afraid of putting too much pressure, with all the angry gurgling going on inside.

JD, who had been very busy chasing her toy mice, perked up at the sudden company and jumped on the couch as well, meowing and stepping on Leo's thigh in order to headbutt Jonah's chin.

"She's ignoring me," Leo groaned, pressing a hand on his stomach, "I stepped on her tail earlier."

"Well, I can't blame her," Jonah scoffed, kissing the top of JD's head, "Leo didn't mean it, baby."

As if she understood him, JD crawled on Jon's lap, nuzzling the inside of his arm and letting out a happy meow. Leo opened his eyes to glare at the cat, pouting.

"It was an accident! I was rushing in," his stomach let out a loud growl and he squirmed, gulping down, "Jon..."

"Shit, give me a second," Jonah sprung up, taking JD with him, and rushed to their kitchen, in order to grab a bowl. By the time he made it back, ten seconds later, Leo had his eyes squeezed shut and was breathing slowly through his mouth as if he was giving birth.

"Here, here, here-" Jon pushed the bowl under his chin and Leo grabbed it with sweaty fingers, but didn't immediately retch. Jonah cringed, planting JD down and moving so he wasn't directly looking at the bowl, but could help Leo hold it up, "baby?"

A nauseated hiccup shook the blonde's frame and he let out a moan, leaning forward and drooling over the bowl, "fuck..." he cleared his throat, taking a deep breath, "my stomach hurts."

Jonah frowned, not liking this one bit. He hated the strong feeling of concern, over something so dumb like food poisoning, but he couldn't help it. Leo worried him always.

"Leo, no, don't do that!" Jonah groaned, as he realized his fiancee was shoving a finger down his throat to trigger his gag reflex, "don't force it-"

Leo shook his head, pulling back his hand and burping wetly over the bowl, "I can feel it in my stomach..." his voice was thick with queasiness and he hiccupped again, his belly letting out a disgusting wet sound, "Urgh, fuck..."

"Can I h-" he never finished that sentence, as there was a sudden wet noise in the back of Leo's throat and the blonde folded in half, projectile vomiting in the bowl.

He hung over it, panting as if he had just ran a marathon, before letting out a dainty little burp and another impressive stream of sick fell from his lips. Leo let out a whimper, coughing, then sighed, "Holy fuck... I feel tons better," he said hoarsely, causing Jonah to let out a disbelieving snort.

"Are you sure?" Jon scoffed, biting down a gag of his own, his mouth watering like crazy at the gruesome sight. Leo nodded, forcing up another burp.

"Yeah... Like crazy better," he rolled his shoulders, then let out a whine, "aw angel, you look grey. Sit down, I can clean this up-"

"No, I'm o-Oo-" Jonah interrupted himself with a retch and Leo let out a little giggle, planting a kiss in the inside of his wrist, since his boyfriend was sitting on the couch's arm, and slowly getting up.

"You're fine, uh?" He chuckled quietly, grabbing the bowl and gingerly walking to the bathroom to empty it out. Jon let out a humiliated sigh, sitting down on the couch and staring at his feet. He thought he was over this, he hated when Leo was feeling sick and his body decided to attention seek.

His belly clenched and he brought up a little sickly burp, breathing out slowly against the prickles of nausea... "Hey," Leo crouched in front of him, between Jon's knees, "you're okay? Are you sure it's just sympathy sickness?"

"Yep," Jon gulped down, nodding, "are you-"

"Really, I'm fine. That's on me for being too lazy to cross the street to go to the restaurant that I know won't make me ill," Leo rolled his eyes, leaning in and hugging Jonah by the waist.

In this weird position, with his boyfriend down to his knees in the rug, it was easy for Leo to drop his face to his lap and Jonah leaned back, starting to pet the golden waves of hair, "don't take this badly," he said slowly, while Leo sat down on the ground, leaning his head back to keep getting his hair petted, "but you suck at event planning."

Leo let out an offended huff, but didn't say anything and Jonah folded in half to kiss his forehead upside down, "I'm gonna take this from you and I'll scout for a location, okay? You worry about the damn flowers or what not."

"Anything more inconsequential you wanna hand me?" Leo pouted, causing Jon to grin and kiss the tip of his nose.

"Test me and I'll put you on water duty," he teased, before falling back against the couch, "so March?"

"Yeah, March," Leo smiled, then let out a little pleased sigh as JD sniffled his hand and came to sit on his lap.

[creatingblackcharacters]

I CANT BELIVE I FORGOT TO SEND THIS ASK. ADHD is killing me. Anyways,

holy shit, Sam and Jammer from Misfits & Magic (watch it on dropout)

first of all. I HAVE to give props to the fucking incredible DM, Aabria Lyengar,

Who is not only amazing, but also one of the best dm’s I’ve ever heard. One of my favorite clips from episode one is when she completely SHOCKS Brennan Lee mulligan (one of the DMs of all time) with her sick as fuck decision to describe what his character Does Not See, something Brennan never did. OK. NEXT

This is Jammer. He’s a sports man himbo who loves his friends dearly and has a pet loving basketball because it’s sick. He’s really friendly and will always bring people into their group and hype them up to make sure he and his friends feel GOOD about themselves.

Some of his cutest scenes are with Evan Kelmp, where they give eachother compliments and . God I don’t want to spoil it but I’m also grinning while typing this.

This is his actor . Who is a national treasure. Lou Wilson!!!

And Last but DEFINITELY NOT LEAST . Sam.

She’s a twitch streamer who mainly does mukbangs. She’s a real powerhouse who loves talking to people!! She also can see the lines of affection(?) between people and her pet patrons thing is a stream pig (a cute little pink piglet) named after her favorite movie, Terminator 2!!!!! Her mom was part of a MLM scam so she mostly wears that sort of thing. She also loves her friends so, so so much . She’s full of love and the urge to create content. I love her.

and this is her wonderful actor, Danielle Radford!

Anyways go watch misfits & magic on dropout it’s the best I think. Ever

Black women running D&D 🥹🥹🥹 oh I'm so happy. I've heard of Aabria being iconic, and I fully support (plus that art behind her?? 🤌🏾🔥🔥) Lou!! His face makes me happy when I see him on here. I don't remember like, hardly anyone from all the D&D stuff that gets posted on here, but when I see him I'm like MY BOY LOU!! He's such a doll, truly. I actually am really charmed by Sam's design. It's so normal lol, like omg that's my cousin or something. I too love piglets, like sending me pictures of baby piglets will never go astray. Danielle just better with that color!! I tried color like that once, it didn't stick 😭 I gotta commit stronger. This was a joy to read!

Hot Chocolate: I was actually just watching a video on Aabria! It was complimenting the way she paints the scenes in a cinematic fashion, that really immerses you into the setting and story. This is something I plan on trying when I DM in the near future, so she is definitely inspirational! Lou Wilson strikes again! I need to watch him play, because I feel like I'm missing an amazing time and inspiration for characters that I play. I'm so interested in the world of this campaign because what the hell is going on??? Lol thanks for putting me on!

[gender-euphowrya]

why is the go-to reaction people have to calls Not to consume media involving super problematic people always "i'll pirate it :)" just don't fucking do that either

how do you fucking find the ability to enjoy the thing knowing the fucked up shit the people behind it did.

[naamahdarling]

.

[hamartia-grander]

Wyll breaking up with the player character if Ulder dies so Wyll must become the Duke makes me wanna throw up sobbing because he actually thinks that just because his father's first duty being to Baldur's Gate made him a Bad Father that Wyll himself will inevitably be a Bad Lover because surely no one could match love with duty if his father couldn't, unknowing he has more love in one hand than his father had in his entire body. fuck

[quadrantadvisor]

The Owl House takes place on a corpse. That's clear from the beginning. The people we meet, the fantastical things we see, every part of it is life that comes from death, and it's beautiful. Luz says that, the first time she's far enough away to see the bones. It's beautiful. The Titan was so full of life and magic that what he left behind could be passed on and made anew, and the people who sprung from that, who rely on it, understand that and are grateful. Everything they have is built on the bones of a god.

But what grows from the bones of children? Nothing. Nothing at all.

The Titan hunters killed children. They said they were monsters, but they were children. Children who played games and laughed and from their first conscious moments wanted to be loved and belong. And they hunted them to extinction, and kept their pristine skulls as trophies. An entire room full of them, of tiny skulls that could've become something wonderful and terrible and life-giving but never had the chance. They wear them, as a badge of honor. Look what I've done, look what I destroyed.

Philip Wittebane had been making grimwalkers for hundreds of years, sure, but even knowing that, there's so many of them. How many could've reached 20? There's piles of them, of bones and identical masks, scattered at the bottom of a pit, and god, were they dead, when he threw them down there? It's clear that he doesn't care, that the only thing that matters is disposing of them once they wear out their usefulness, moving on to the new model. Children tossed aside, left to rot and decay, and when we see them the bones are all clean.

[crimeronan]

side effect of having my hydroxychloroquine work really well is that i'm forgetting what it felt like to be Really Horrifically Sick. both because of the emotional distance and because of my general memory issues. the memory issues are a LOT worse concerning Times When I Was Horrifically Sick.

so i'm actually pretty grateful to my past self for the amount of time i spent oversharing here. if i scroll back like seven months in my autoimmune tag i can find posts of me essentially going "eh, i'm sleeping for 22 hours a day but i don't really care anymore bc i've accepted i'm gonna die" and "life sux. can't breathe or think or feel my chest but that's constant so i don't wanna go to the ER about it AGAIN" and "docs took 14 vials of blood 4 x-rays several lung images several lung tests and an EKG before i even left the hospital today. even tho they havent gotten my test results back yet" and i'm like god Damn.

I REALLY LIVED LIKE THIS????????

[suncaptor]

nothing will make you sympathise with conspiracy theorist ideology more than having a seemingly rare reaction to a vaccine lmao.

[look-at-the-stars-tonight]

the amount of effort that goes into figuring out what to cook and eat every day is RIDICULOUS. i used to think people were so weird and boring for eating the same thing every single day but it truly does make life so much easier

[sonics-left-shoe]

Tired of living in a period of enabled overconsumption and the quality of everything being replaced for cheaper alternatives with only higher prices. Tired of corporations being able to get away with selling products that won't last. Tired of unnecessary mass manufacturing. Tired of trends and impulsive purchases being encouraged by companies. Tired of celebrities being worshipped whilst they help destroy the environment. Tired of micro transactions and blatantly invasive advertisements everywhere. Tired of false advertisement, misinformation and clickbait being normalised. Tired of corporate fear mongering and blatant disregard of human livelihoods.

I'm so tired of all the wastefulness and cruelty and how corporations can just get away with it.

[crabussy]

everyone in my school loves to scream as louyd as they can on purpose to hurt me just because they can

[peribirb]

you ever catch feelings for somebody but you've spent your entire life convinced/convincing yourself that you're fundamentally unattractive and broken in a way that makes you unlovable and unsuited to any sort of relationship, and so instead of just enjoying that extra dopamine burst of seeing them around you just make yourself feel miserable for even daring to feel that way in the first place? or is that just me?

[bulldagger-bait]

When it comes to hygiene tasks and self care with disability and chronic illness, its pretty much a constant case of: don't let perfect be the enemy of the good.

Basically: it's better to do something, than to do nothing at all.

TLDR: Just because you can't do something "properly" doesn't mean you shouldn't do it at all. Do it half-way. Do it shitty. Do it barely. Do it on a technicality. But do what you can. Just try, because doing something will help you.

If you don't have the energy to scrub your body with a sponge, just rub soap over your skin with your hands.

If you don't have the energy to wash your whole body with soap, just hit the places where sweat accumulates, or where you're smelliest.

If you don't have the energy to wash with soap AT ALL, just sitting in water is better than nothing. It will wash away dirt and oils.

If you can't bathe or shower at all, a warm wash cloth is your new best friend. If that's too much, then try bath wipes. They're a bit bigger than regular wet wipes, and a bit more heavy duty. They're designed to help keep bed ridden patients clean in hospitals.

If you don't have the energy to dry yourself after a bath or a shower, just put on a bathrobe and get into bed. If you don't have the energy to get dressed afterwards, just don't. It can wait until you can.

If you don't have energy to brush your teeth for two minutes, honestly, just a cursory scrub is better than not doing anything.

If you can't brush your teeth twice a day, brush in the evenings. It will help take away the build up of food from the day.

If you don't have the energy to brush AT ALL, honestly, just take a cloth and wipe the plaque off your teeth. Rinse with mouth wash after if you'd like. Something is always better than nothing.

If you can't floss twice a day. Try once. If that's too much, try a few times a week. If that's too much, try setting aside a day once a week as a goal. If you can't keep a schedule, do it when you're able to. Hell, I keep some floss next to my bed so that if I forget and don't have the energy to go get it, I can just reach over.

If you can't iron your clothes, don't bother. Wrinkles are fine. Wear jumpers over wrinkly t-shirts. No one will know, and honestly, most people won't even care. If it's really wrinkly and it's A Big Deal And It Needs To Be Ironed, here's my life hack. Step 1: take a spray bottle, and spritz the item of clothing (while you're wearing it is easiest) until it's lightly damp. Step 2: use a hair-dryer on the clothes until they're dry. It gets rid of creases like nobody's business, it's easier than lugging out the iron and ironing board, and you get to have nice toasty warm clothes afterwards.

If you can't fold your clothes, try just hanging them up. It's less commitment. It's quicker to do. Granted, you need to have the space in order to do this, but it is also good at helping you downsize, and lets you visualise exactly what you have.

If you can't put your clothes away, invest in a couple of laundry baskets, and then just keep your clean clothes in the baskets. You can then separate washed clothes into underwear, pants, and shirts baskets. You can just leave them like that. I'm giving you permission to never fold your laundry again if you can't. Just leave it unfolded. Who's going to care? Something is better than nothing. If you can, try to put those baskets into your closet so that you can keep the clutter out of sight, and give yourself a more restful environment.

If you can't separate your clothing out into different categories and wash them "properly" (whites, warm tones, cool tones, darks, delicates / switching between hot & cold washes / paying attention to laundry instructions on the label) then just don't worry about it. If you cold wash your clothes, colours won't bleed. Maybe gradually over the course of dozens of washes there'll be some changes in hue, but it's really not as high stakes as the One Red Sock In The Whites Turns Them Pink trope makes it out to be.

I've pretty much come to the point in my life where if a piece of clothing can't survive the washer and dryer, then it's just not meant to be. I colour separate my clothes, and if I have the energy/remember I'll take my bras and jumpers out of the washing machine to drip dry. But otherwise, I leave it to the universe.

If you can't separate out your recycling, then don't. If you have a large amount of rubbish you need to get rid of but the idea of separating it out properly is stopping you from doing so, then just don't worry about it. I know it's not ideal, but if you have garbage in your room/house and you need to get rid of it, please just get rid of it. Don't let the problem get bigger and harder to deal with. Don't let "doing something properly" get in the way of keeping your living spaces clean. Please. Give yourself understanding.

If you can't wash your dishes, get paper plates. Obviously, it's not ideal, but it is better that you eat food than skipping meals. It is better that you have a clean kitchen, rather than having dishes piling up and making it harder to look after yourself.

If you can't prepare meals for yourself keep making the tasks easier and easier. If you can't do recipes, then simplify. Use pasta sauce from the jar instead of making it. Eat canned soup. Buy food you can just stick in the oven. If you eat fish fingers and microwave veggies every night, it's better than not eating anything at all. It's better than having to fork out money on take-out. If you need ready-made meals, then get them. If you're literally just eating a raw cauliflower for dinner; 1) I see you, 2) me too, sis, 3) something is better than nothing.

These are the basic things you need to do every day to function as a person. They are your activities of daily living. Brushing your teeth. Bathing or showering. Using the bathroom. Getting dressed. Eating. Drinking. Sleeping. Keeping your environment clean. You don't need to do these things perfectly, but they need to happen in order for you to have a decent quality of life.

And it breaks my heart, because I know that so many disabled people can't do these things every day. I'm not saying this to guilt or judge, I'm saying that these are basic needs; you deserve these things. These things bring dignity. If a disabled person is unable to do these things, it diminishes their quality of life. It robs them of dignity.

If you need help to do these things, Its okay to ask for help. It's okay to need help. But if you can't get that help and you have to do these things by yourself -- or you just plain want to be independent and do it without help-- then don't hold yourself to standards you can't meet.

Don't let perfect be the enemy of the good. Doing something is always better than doing nothing. Even if it's not perfect. Even if it's not done well. Do what you can.

[jestroer]

Being incredibly social and thriving in a company of literally anyone pleasant enough to talk to and also having an extreme social anxiety is not an easy work but somebody has to fucking do it

[heartshattering]

I'll wake up and this will all be a nightmare, right?