#but smoking is bad for your lungs so I can see edibles being used more often than bud

[catgrandpa]

I need people to write more fics about stoner dekusquad !! It’s always bakusquad, as if they’re all not health freaks (minus kami) who wouldn’t dare do anything to jeopardize their body.

Izuku self medicates for his chronic pain, anxiety, and ptsd. He introduces Shouto to cannabis for the same reasons. Unbeknownst to them, Tenya also self medicates thanks to his brother using it for his pain after Stain. They end up stumbling upon eachother smoking outside or smth. Ochako isn’t really a stoner per say, but she’ll partake on occasion, either for fun or if she needs to relax.

[archetypal-archivist]

Notes for Outer Wilds World-Building

-head canon heavy, but grounded in reason I think-

Healthcare: Lots of treating symptoms but not a ton of fixing the thing that caused the initial problem as the Hearthian body is remarkably sturdy and when self-healing can't take care of it, it would take some advanced healthcare to fix it (ex. punctured lung, strong infection). And that's not always something the Hearthians have, as why would they put a ton of effort into advanced pharmaceuticals like penicillin and invasive internal surgeries when it's so rare that someone gets hurt to that point and doesn't immediately die from it in a matter of days? I picture most medicine is herbal in nature, plant-derived and highly concentrated if necessary, such as opioids/morphine for pain that can be taken by injection until you get home and can patch yourself up. Bandages and bed rest and going off of what's taught to you (with a dose of improvising) are key to Hearthian healthcare. For the Hearthians, it's less unwillingness to help in cases of disability and more not being sure how, as the tech to do so would need to be jury-rigged or made from scratch. How well this helps varies as some things like missing limbs and damaged hearing can be accounted for but things like malfunctioning kidneys can't. Ironically, diabetes would spell bad news for a Hearthian.

Food: They don't have birds on Timber Hearth or else we'd see a lot more primitive wings for flying, so that means the animal life differs from earth. Lots of bugs and amphibians and fish, but very few mammals if any as fur is weird to the Hearthians. Hearthians are likely omnivores, given their history, but no trapping of land animals beyond insects. I imagine mostly teams of gatherers picking food from known locations and being careful about how much they take, and maybe some "controlled burnings" to clear out unwanted brush and give room to grow for the plants they actually want. The burnings may be more of an accident but the effect is the same regardless. Berries, nuts (especially pine nuts), cattail tubers and pith, water reed shoots, edible wild greens, and bread made from the flour of ground up tubers/acorns/pine nuts is common. This is supplemented by fish, the fat of which (Google candle fish) and the gelatin formed by boiling their bones are also used in many things. Marshmallows are made the old way, from mallow roots and sugar cane. Snow covered in sap or molasses is a treat, made more common with the invention of rockets that let you grab snow and fly it back to the village before it melts. Chera (borrowed from the fandom) is a tough, fibrous fruit that is sort of bready and is used much like apples are as a thickener in bread and eaten as mash on its own. Pickling, smoking, and canning are very common in Hearthian culture and are key ways of preserving food for when certain key gathered plants are out of season. During the insect mating season when the flies are out in full force, people will smack the clouds of bugs with sap-covered sheets of metal, scrape the bugs off, and grill them up into patties like burgers. This time of year is all hands on deck and not everyone likes eating fly patties but as food, it's incredibly nutritious and ground up flies are sometimes added to food that is lacking. Cooking is communal for the bulk of it, with a town cook pot and storehouse being open to the public to pull from, but if you want to eat beyond standard hours or mass-produced fare, you're on your own and you best hope you know how to cook over a wood fire stove. Filling the communal food pot is often a job foisted on hatchlings and the elders supervise. Specialty foods like sap wine are a trade item or are saved for celebrations and traditions.

Travel: Hearthians don't have wheeled carts as getting things into their crater via wheeled cart would be difficult at best. Instead they'll drag chopped down trees where they need to go via sleds or float them on the rivers or lower them into the crater with elevators. Anything else they'll carry down personally. To get around the planet, Hearthians just walk and if it takes more than a day, they camp along the way. Now that ships are a thing however, travel has shrunk the world by a lot- not that it does the average Hearthian much good. The ships are dangerous, prone to causing fires if one tries to land on Timber Hearth proper as rockets plus grass equals bad. A skilled pilot can pick a decent landing spot that's damp or barren enough to not be a problem, but it's usually so far from where you want to go that it's better to walk anyway. Said average Hearthians also do not like dealing with g-forces or potential death. Those are the only reasons why it's not normal for astronauts to ferry average Hearthians around like a taxi service or to take materials from point A to point B across the planet. None of this matters on the Attlerock however, as there's nothing to catch fire there, so ships will haul stuff up there all the time at Esker and Hornfels' behest. Rocket fuel is made from flammable gases pumped up from underground by the mining equipment as waste. It used to be released into the atmosphere to keep the miners from suffocating or exploding (a problem, sometimes those spouts would catch alight) but Slate had the bright idea of storing it in tanks under pressure. They already had pressurized air for the miners at the deepest depths to breathe where air was hard to come by, why couldn't they bottle up the waste gases to dispose of more safely? Like burning it elsewhere?

Clothing: Fabric is made from the fibers of a linen-like plant called flush, names for the purplish hue at the base of the reed's stem. The weavers' house is filled with Hearthians whose job it is to separate the fibers out and spin them into thread. From there, the weaver in charge of the loom will dye the thread with plant-based dyes and use a flying loom to quickly weave bolts of fabric. It takes a LOT of thread to make fabric but thanks to the weavers' bugging Slate into making them into a machine running off water power, the thread-making time has been cut down significantly. However, the whole process still takes a while so most Hearthians only own a few pieces of clothing and they're expected to patch it, hand-me-down it, and wash it until it is literally in rags before they get more. Hatchlings get the worst of it, they get pretty much nothing but hand-me-down clothes as they outgrow things too fast for unique outfits for each of them. Scarves, hats, and handkerchiefs are an exception and are often the only piece of clothing a hatchling has that survives to adulthood, which makes them all the more precious. Dresses- which take more fabric- and anything patterned or multicolored is a sign of indulgence/finery or a very nice gift and is such relegated to fancy clothes for fine events. Shoes are made of fish leather or treated fabric strips wrapped around a wood sole and structure and then sewn in place.

Economy: Hearthians run on a trade economy, with every person expected to contribute in some way. You are always guaranteed food from the communal cook pot and shelter in either a house of your own or on someone else's couch/floor, but beyond that you get side-eyed if you ask for things too often without offering something in return. Fortunately, Hearthians have a strong oral tradition and a very relaxed (boring) lifestyle so most are happy to trade gossip and stories for basic amenities. Building houses, weaving fabric, gathering food, working in the mines, and watching the hatchlings and tasks like those are ones that are never required for people to do, you can walk off and take a break whenever. However, it's seen as poor taste to do that for more than a few days at a time without cause because if you aren't working, you're letting your fellow Hearthians down. If you can't do big work for health reasons or lack of skill, you're expected to pick up small work like knitting, patching things up, cooking at the communal food pot, etc. What most hatchlings end up doing is they either find a passion and just continue with it into a proper "job" that helps the village in some way, they get an apprenticeship, or they get picked up by an adult and pretty much conscripted in order to "keep them out of trouble." Fire watch and astronaut and jobs like it are jobs of high prestige and are very demanding in the body, and as such run as apprenticeships with Gossan and Tektite selecting who they want to teach from those that come up to them and ask to learn. Such jobs don't do much to physically help the village (beyond bringing back space relics but those aren't always useful to the village at large) but they do bring in a ton of interesting stories and those are prime currency for the Hearthians.

Life Cycle: Hearthians are hermaphrodites that breed like fish do- during certain times of year, Hearthians may feel the urge to slip down to the river and release sperm and eggs into the water. Couples can go together, but most don't make much of it, seeing them as temporary dalliances or choosing to put up with being a little hot and itchy for a few days, refusing to go, and then the season is done for them for the year. The sperm and eggs mingle in warm underground pools and incubate there until they get hard and heavy enough to be picked up by the current. Due to how the waters of Timber Hearth run, the eggs more or less end up being carried to the same place every year where Hearthians in charge of raising hatchlings go to pick them up. The eggs are candled to check for life, then swaddled and placed into cribs to hatch. Hatchlings are raised in batches together in the Hatchling House, with sick ones quarantined in a back room to keep the rest from getting ill (so things like measles don't wipe out a whole generation). Hatchlings are fed mash until their baby teeth fall out, then they are fed real food like fish with bones in it. They only are named when the caretaker is sure that they will survive their first month or three of life, then they are introduced to the village by that name. They are allowed to go outside for the first time once they can walk and talk a little bit, an occasion marked by giving them shoes. After that, a hatchling may leave the Hatchling House to live on their own once they have a place to stay lined up, work, and they either can drink sap wine (which hatchlings don't have the enzymes to digest) or meet a certain height. As Hearthians age, the ears droop more, the skin pales, and the body starts failing. Past a certain age a Hearthian just kinda stops healing, as if all their sturdiness is limited to their younger years, and if they survive past even that, then their mind begins to go. Deaths are grieved and the dead buried with song and music being played with a space being left in the song for the deceased to "play a solo" and the rest of the band picking up after as a reminder that life goes on. In a few rare cases, hatchlings can imprint on an adult and vice versa, which gives rise to more "standard" parent child bonds and frequently, apprenticeships.

Calendar: The Hearthian planet does have seasons, sort of, but mostly a "hot and dry" vs "cool and wet" divide. No snow, their winters are just slightly more rain than usual and their summers are slightly warmer and with a chance for thunderstorms. However, there are still holidays involved with the changing of the seasons, mostly tied to when food is more or less available and when the solstices are. The alignment of the planets is also celebrated but that's a more recent celebration that popped up and it intensified into a major holiday only when the observatory got built with its ability to lock down alignments to exact dates. Breeding season is an informal holiday, being a few days in Spring and Autumn where sap wine is plentiful and people are expected to take some time off from work to relax. Hearthian formal holidays involve getting everyone in the village to sing, dance, and play music together around a bonfire. Stories and sap wine flow thick and fast and the best storytellers and musicians are treated to the best food and treats. Musicians will sometimes "duel" for funsies to see who is better at improvising and technical skills, to the joy of the crowd. Informal celebrations, like when an astronaut launches for the first time or one comes home or a batch of hatchlings are given a name on their name day lead to similar events, just scaled down some with only non-busy people attending. However, Hearthians love a good party so many will make time for such gatherings if they can.

[csprslvt]

teacher's aide.

new series alert! you and i, and her has officially come to an end (unless i decide to go back to it or am requested too) i have decided to write something a little lighter, more for fun! teacher aide is a collage au featuring volleyball player abby and campus dealer ellie. couldn't decide who i wanted reader to end up with so, why not make them fight for your attention? sounds good 2 me!

Chapter one

Summary: reader is a teacher's aide and struggles to keep professionalism with two of her students.

Warnings: drug use(weed), mentions of sex, foul language, reader is described is slightly described as wearing "girly" shoes/clothes and shorter than abby but it completely unknown other than that when it comes to skin tone, hair type, etc.

Being in University was a lot, especially being a Physics major and teacher aid for the same subject. You loved it, it was your passion and your professor was great. Its just the fucking students that drove you crazy.

So here you were, on the doorstep of Ellie Williams’ dorm, once again.

Was it wrong to smoke with one of your students? Probably yes. But right now with the amount of people accidentally setting fire during one of the labs where you specifically told them to keep substance A away from substance E because it could cause ignition, you could care less about morals.

Besides, Ellie was a friend. Maybe this was unprofessional but caring was beyond you right now.

The door opened before you could even knock. Ellie’s eyes lit up when she saw you and a smirk grew on her face.

“Come to see me again? It's the third time this week.”

“How’d you know it was me?” You questioned her, stepping inside and closing the door behind you.

“I could hear your heels clicking from miles away babe.” 

“They're platforms, not heels.”

“Whatever shoes are shoes.”

“Of course you think that with your raggedy ass converse.”

“Damn professor, no need to attack me like that.”

You rolled your eyes.

“I'm stressed.”

“Now that I can help, come sit.” Ellie led you in and she grabbed her electric dab rig, filling it with some wax. You sat on her bed, watching her prepare the rig. She took the liberty of opening the windows and stuffing a towel under the door to prevent the smell from escaping. 

“Extra cautious this time huh.”

“Well last time I used the rig it stank so bad it leaked into the common area. But it's your favorite, so we’re using it.”

Ellie handed you the rig and you grabbed it with greedy hands. Inhaling and exhaling, you felt smoke filling your lungs and after a few minutes you were completely relaxed. Dabs always hit the best. They were your favorite for that reason.

Ellie hit it after you, she was kind of an expert at it, when she was high you could hardly tell. You were sure she attended your classes baked. She always said it helped her focus. She took a few puffs and then got up, grabbing something from the mini fridge. Somewhere along the lines of your meetings she started to get your favorite snacks from when you got the munchies. She was caring for sure, or maybe she got tired of hearing your high self complain of cravings for edible cookie dough.

You felt so…content. It was like gravity was so much stronger, slowing your movements, your muscles were relaxed like jelly. You flopped down on Ellie’s bed on her constellation themed bed sheets. It smelt of her, laundry detergent and cannabis. It didn't seem like a pleasant combination, but it always soothed you.

“Gimme my cookie dough.” you mumbled and Ellie smiled. She loved when you were like this in front of her, happy, stress free, maybe a little vulnerable. She handed you the jar of Tollhouse edible cookie dough she had personally paid for. You immediately dug in and seeing you so joyful made her stomach turn in the most lovely way possible. She didn't know how you hadn't realized how much she liked you. She let you use her personal stash for free, bought you snacks, called you babe. But you were as oblivious as ever. Hiding under this mask of professionalism, never letting her get close enough unless you were high.

“My fucking students are drivin’ me nuts Els.”

Els. Oh she loved it when you called her Els.

“What’d they do babe?” 

“They almost set the lab on fire after I warned them a hundred million trillion times to not mix substance A and E because it would cause ignition. And they care too much about looking cute to put on their googles so fucking whats his name got baking soda in his eye! And whose fault did that come down to? Me!”

“What's his name?”

“The crusty dude with a receding hairline, he thinks he's hot shit.”

“Owen?”

“Yes! Fucking Owen!”

Ellie threw her head back in laughter, you were such a kind, patient person to all of your students seeing this side of you was amusing.

“His hairline isn't that bad.”

“Dude he's like 20 something and looks 38.”

The smile Ellie had never left her face.

“Okay yea, good point.”

After eating, you ended up falling asleep. Sleeping in your students' bed? Probably also bad, cuddling with her, was probably even worse. But you blamed it on the drugs, on how tiny the bed was. You always snuck out while Ellie was still asleep, she didn't seem to mind. And though you were treating her like a booty call minus the sex and replace it with smoking she didn't really act like it bothered her. So, you assumed she didn't care. 

That was the thing though, she couldn't help but to be disappointed every time she woke up alone. She just hid it well.

You snuck out of Ellie’s bed, escaping from her grasp on your waist. It was nearly 6 am. You had been out for many hours and you had a class to get to at 8. You left the dorm, shutting the door behind you gently and as you walked out, someone caught your eye, watching you.

Abby Anderson,med student and captain of the volleyball team. Also, one of your students. She raised an eyebrow at your disheveled appearance. Fuck, you looked like you were doing the walk of shame.  You ignored her, pretending like you didn't make eye contact and left quickly for your own dorm. It wasn't too far away from Ellies, maybe an 8 minute walk. You showered, got ready and studied before class, same routine as always.

When it was time for work you were exhausted so you stopped by Ruston Coffee for a pick me up.

Upon entering once again, was Abby Anderson, she probably had the same idea as you, stopping to get a cold brew to stay awake. Still you didn't want to interact with her beyond professional reasons especially since she caught you sneaking out of Ellie’s dorm.

Your luck must've run out though, because she approached you, standing tall in a black wife beater and jeans, hair in her signature braid she took in your appearance. 

“So… Ellie Williams huh.” 

“Not even a hello before you interrogate me huh.” You responded, looking up at her. If you were anyone else you’d be intimidated by her muscular arms and snarky smile. But this was Abby, and you kept an eye on your students, you knew she was just like any other, she often cracked jokes and laughed in class with her friends, Owen and Mel. You weren't afraid.

“You got me there y/n I suppose I'm feeling a bit nosey. I saw you sneak out bright and early.”

“Stalker.” 

“So you're not denying it.”

“You know Anderson with the amount you're questioning me about my sex life I would say you wanna take me on a date too.”

Abby smiled, “Maybe I do.” 

You didn't expect that. You didn't have time to respond before your name was called for your order, you quickly turned away from her and grabbed it. Fleeing as if you committed a crime. Abby’s smile dropped. Perhaps she made you uncomfortable? She hoped not.

In reality you just didn't know what to say. You were never good with emotions, with flirting, so it was a miracle your name was called. Besides you already broke rules cuddling up with Ellie, it would be better to stay away from Abby’s advances. Right? She would give up, right?

You didn't avoid Abby for very long, she was in your next period. You stood beside your boss, Professor Servopoulus. Or to you, simply Tess. She insisted that you don't use formalities, because it made her feel “older than she was.” Today was an easier day, you would help Tess with lesson plans and grade some papers while she lectured on matter and energy. There was a mix of types of students in your classes. Some medical majors like Abby with physics as a prerequisite and some Astronomy majors like Ellie where physics was a necessity. There were always some like Owen who was in engineering and a few other students that seemed too simply just be there.

 You sat at Tess’s desk while she lectured, she hated lectures she preferred lab days but sometimes traditional learning was in the lesson plan. You noticed some students nodding off an hour in. Of fucking course one of them was Ellie. Tess gave you a look and gestured for you to wake her up. You stood up and walked up the lecture hall, all the way in the back where Ellie was napping. Eyes watched you, everyone was quiet holding in laughter at Ellie’s display. You kneeled facing her, 

“Williams, wake up.” You whispered.

No reaction, the closer you got the more you noticed some drool at the corner of her lips and the faint sound of snoring created giggles in the audience.

You almost smiled yourself at the noise. Ellie was in deep REM stage sleep. You tried again,

“Ellie. Wake up!” Now you were really smiling. She didn't move.

Finally you reached out and shook her gently, “Ellie wake up oh my god.”

Ellie jumped; she seemed to have forgotten where she was because she mumbled, “Babe, five more minutes.” before putting her head down again. You blushed, leave it to Ellie to break professional relationships in front of an entire class. Luckily no one seemed to hear and if they did they laughed it off. “Ellie Williams!” You nudged her, she opened her eyes and looked around finally grasping her surroundings, turned beet red and sat up. Everyone was staring at her.

“My bad Professor Servopoulus! Sorry Y/n!” You simply nodded at her; you were totally gonna bully her about this during your next smoke session. You woke up the other students and returned to the desk. The entire time one set of eyes was watching you, observing intently. 

—----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Abby Anderson was a people watcher, and no, it wasn't creepy. She was simply interested in the ways people interact, the way different mannerisms appear in relationships, but most importantly she was interested in you.

You, her pretty teacher’s aide who was shorter than her even in those platform mary janes with buckles on them you wore everyday, you whose hands were soft and manicured when they brushed with hers handing out supplies for labs, you who smelt of Coffee beans and clean shampoo, you who was gentle and understanding when helping struggling students, you who seemed to have it all together, you who she could look at for ages just watching your little quirks and focused expressions.

But it was clear that she wasn't the only one who had her eye on you. Ellie Williams seemed to gravitate towards you, asking you an abundance of questions during labs, looked at you with bright green eyes as if you created the sun itself and seemed to be just as enamored with you as Abby was.

 It isn't everyday that you would see a teacher's aide that beautiful and around her age. She was sure you were an upperclassman no older than 22, who simply had a love for physics. That was something she would never understand. As a Medical student, she was only in physics because she had to be but you being there made it a lot easier. You were very helpful and a good communicator, having you was a blessing to everyone who wasn't as great with physics.

By the time the lecture came to an end, she tried to make eye contact with you and wave goodbye but you avoided looking at her, instead chatting it up with Ellie who stopped to ask you some “questions” as you were leaving.

The smile quickly dropped from her face as she watched the two of you. Your interactions seemed so natural. There had to be something going on, and she was going to figure it out.

Notes; pt 2?

[fan-art-ic]

Someone sent this ask to a blogger I like and they didn't bite, so I WILL

Gotham dream blunt rotation as rated:

Poison Ivy might seem an obvious choice at first, but she swears she can still hear the plant screaming inside your blunt, so if she isn't already hitting you dead the vibe has been killed: 3/10

Catwoman would steal all your weed and wrap a tighter blunt then you can imagine she would bring out wine spritzers and cheeses as the snack so it's fun but you will have to go buy a new ⅛ as soon as you leave, you will be starting to crush on her but she will talk about batman the whole time: 7/10

Harley Quinn would make those crazy ass joints that are like spider shaped and she would get toasted but youd get so couchlocked it'd be like a million years passed when you come to she's smoking a second spider and you have hyena drool on you: 5/10

Kite Man rips huge beefy clouds of smoke, spends half his evil plan budget on buying a gravity bong, has a shitty hideout in his parents basement, but his mom is really nice and can out-rip her son and she would bring some apple slices and water down for snacking: 6/10

Two-Face would have been a total weenie as Harvey pre accident and never touched the stuff, but after he will occasionally light up because he enjoys how both of his sides will shut up and he can think for a second. Doesn't care if it's shitty buds or premo flower it's whatever the nearest lackey has so you will be hacking up a lung either way. Spends the whole time telling you to be quiet when you try to chat: 4/10

Bruce would suck the only people he might be good in a rotation is wonder woman and superman, anyone else he is just silent the whole time and ignoring everyone to look at his phone, will sometimes double and triple hit before passing: 3/10

Stephanie stole her dad's weed as a teenager and is really bad at rolling blunts, but if you tease her, she will finger taze you, would have a whole set-up for a rotation set up with pillows and candles and bowls of chips, she either gets very mellow or gets really wild so it's a flip for if you're going to watch pirated movies or go roam the aisles of walmart: 8/10

Tim would act like a weed conneisur since Stephanie lit him up, but he'd be the type of guy you could give a weed a fancy name and sell it for $50 extra and he wouldn't even blink, rarely rotates but if he does he is punctual and never double hits, will ramble on and on about computer specs and graphic cards, will give you the last hit even though he wants it: 6/10 but only because sometimes Tim gets weird vibes

Alfred hits weed made for elephants its so strong he does it for muscle and joint pain at night so he won't share ever and if you ask he will act like he has no idea what you're talking about, if somehow you can get him to share it will be in the form of a weed cookie and when I tell you they're strong you will be seeing god: 0/10 or 7/10 depending

Jason tried marijuana but didn't like how it made his head feel and his hands shake and he could barely read so it pisses him off. If the blunt in question was a joint made of more tobacco than weed than he might sit in, but otherwise he is video taping other people being fools for future blackmail: 2/10

Dick smoked major weed with the Teen Titans when they were all a team the first time, he has exquisite taste but won't overpay but gets solid middle of the road shit everytime so you won't be ass blasted, but you will be laughing more which is why he loves rotations the communal act of passing, leaning in close to people, everyone getting loose and happier, he loves it and will totally make everyone custom snack plates: 10/10

Cass would try it with Steph or Dick, but she wouldn't like it in the end, would be a big fan of edibles though she'd like the floatiness and using it for sleep: 0/10 but not for lack of effort

[amazinglyegg]

Egg!!!!!!! I wanna kno. What companions you thing would smoke the za? Which companions would enjoy it or hate it or not wanna try it again?

Finally, now THIS is a good companions react!!!

Side note you almost got a "companions react to pizza" because I did NOT know what "za" was slang for. I was very confused on why companions would smoke pizza. I am not a cool druggie :(

Also also I Have Never Touched A Drug Ever so all my information comes from spying on my older sister and her friends "doing their homework in the backyard" when I was like seven. Enjoy.

Companions React to: Weed

Cait:

Yeah sure why not

Pre Benign Intervention she already does a shit ton of psycho so she wouldn't turn down weed

Post Benign Intervention probably won't continue though for obvious reasons

Not the type of person to make it her entire personality though

Codsworth:

Maybe???

Okay okay I know he can't actually smoke it BUT

It's not like they'd program a mr handy to snitch on their owner for slurping on the bong (is that what they do??? That's what it sounds like)

If Sole's having a good time with friends then Codsworth's happy to be the designated sober friend :)

Curie:

Will only try it if its edibles

Smoking is BAD FOR THE LUNGS and she's the type of person to smell someone smoking weed from across the road and complain about it

She is interested in seeing what being high is like and there's no real risks to it so she's down for experimenting

Probably won't do it again but she enjoyed the experience

Danse:

Medical use marijuana?? More likely than you may think

NOT a partier tho. Will take his One (1) perscribed gummy bear he keeps in his weekly pill organizer and frown at anyone who even mentions the number 420

Makes it surprisingly easy to sneak it past him tho. "I'm making weed brownies.... for medical reasons.... the baking helps with my anxiety as well. Don't eat them."

Deacon:

Oh yeah totally [lie]

You would 100% THINK he's the guy to smoke pot. He knows all the code words. He wears the weed shirts. He knows what "za" means.

But deep down he's a fraud

After getting clean from hard chems he really just does not want to touch any drugs or be around high people in general

His deep insecurities and fear of being abandoned as soon as he's unlikeable will leave him too scared to admit any of that though, so he'll end up smoking just to fit in if he can't find a good excuse to do otherwise

Desdemona:

Has probably done it as a teen and probably enjoyed it but won't do it again

She is too important to the Railroad to ever be inebriated

Unless Glory convinces her to take a break and then mayybbee she'll get high with her

Takes a lot of convincing though and will probably only happen as a celebration for destroying the Institute

Father:

Sole will blow smoke in his face and he will die right there and then he is Too Old

Gage:

Gage canonically doesn't like drugs but come on he'd smoke weed

Just a little bit. As a treat. Not the type of person to get ridiculously high for hours

Probably had a bunch of bad highs in the past and now is too scared to do it again around others

Hancock:

Not only does he enjoy it, he's like, Into It

Knows all the different kinds of strains and will shit talk your dealer if you show up with Low Quality Weed

Don't ask him too many questions or else you'll be listening to him explain the details of every strain for three hours straight

Maccready:

NO drugs are BAD and he needs to be a GOOD INFLUENCE for his SON

Ends up getting FOMO immediately and tries it.

Probably enjoys it??? Idk bro this is such a hard prompt I DONT KNOW WHAT WEED IS LIKE

Maxson:

I give up

Nick:

This comic is all you need

Piper:

Would try it if Sole gave it to her

NOT IN FRONT OF NAT THOUGH

Would enjoy it

Uses all the terminology wrong though

Preston:

Lets be honest he needs it

Probably won't like it recreationally and good luck getting him to a doctor so he can get it medically

But medical marijuana would be helpful for him pls get him some

X6-88:

He's a teen boy who's rebelling from his parents (the institute) for the first time so of course he tries it

Acts like he enjoys it even if he doesn't

Does this

Bonus Carrington because I have a good guess on who sent this ask:

[cowboycakes]

Dazed

part two is up here!

❀ Pairing: stoner!Eren Jaeger x needy!Reader

❀ Themes: Your stoned best friend Eren has a get together... and you get a little too high. Modern AU.

❀ Warnings: Marijuana use, alcohol use, FLUFF. Reader uses she/her pronouns.

❀ Word Count: 1.1k

The sound of Eren’s doorbell echoes through his house at about 10 pm on a Saturday night. You, his long time best friend, wait eagerly on his wooden porch. The music from inside was audible over the buzzing of lively insects in the trees. The smell of marijuana was tangible too… you knew Eren’s parents wouldn’t be happy about him smoking inside again. 

You peer in the window as you wait for your escort inside - red solo cups and rolling paper packaging occupied a corner by the door, along with several pairs of shoes. So they’ll take off their shoes but won’t clean up their trash? Some party guests they are…

You ring the doorbell again, getting impatient. Finally, you hear footsteps on the other side. 

The hinges squeak as the front door reveals a very high Eren Jaeger. His eyes are red and squinty. He has his favorite loose hoodie on and his hair tied into an effortless bun. And he reeks of weed…

“Hey, sweetheart,�� Eren says, pulling you inside and into a hug, placing a gentle hand on the back of your head. “Sorry to keep you waiting, I was just finishing up with something in the basement.”

You look up to him innocently. “And what would that be, Jaeger?” you tease. 

He lets out a slow chuckle, clearly a bit impaired. 

“A secret,” he says smiling down at you. 

He sways his feet from side to side as he keeps you in the embrace, eventually moving the two of you to his basement door. Once he opens it, the pungent smell hits you even harder. 

“Your secret smells bad,” you retort, earning another laugh from him. 

He leads you down the carpeted steps to the living room, where your group of friends greet you warmly. Jean, Connie, and Sasha pull you into a big bear hug and each tell you about the substances they had chosen to liven up their night. Jean had gone his usual route - beer, and Connie and Sasha ate two big edibles that Eren made special for them. You look over to see Mikasa and Armin already passed out on the loveseat, cuddled up with a big blanket. It felt so nice to see all of your friends so happy together. 

Then you notice that she is here - Krista. You fake a smile to her, she fakes one to you. She wasn’t all that bad… you just didn’t like how touchy she was with Eren, and how much of his attention she could hog. You had always been reluctant to think of Eren romantically, so why were you so jealous? 

“I’m gonna roll another one, wanna join?” Eren asks the group. 

Sasha and Connie waste no time jumping up at Eren’s offer. Jean and Krista follow. You stay silent, just observing Eren’s fingers as they meticulously roll the big joint on the countertop. He takes it and his lighter to the couch when he’s finished, the group following him with cheeky smiles. 

Krista steals the spot on the couch closest to Eren, putting her hand on Eren’s bicep. You settle on the floor in front of him. 

You had never smoked before, and honestly you just wanted to watch. But it was something about the way Krista was moving her hands up and down Eren’s arm, and sitting so close…

You needed to preoccupy him. 

“Eren,” you declare, “I want to try.”

“Atta girl,” he laughs, surprised he didn’t have to beg you to participate. 

He lights the joint, and moves it to your open lips. You suck in a large hit as you stare into Eren’s eyes. The smoke clouds your lungs, tightening your chest. You try to exhale smoothly, but a coughing fit catches you by surprise. Your friends chuckle at your weakness. 

“You okay?” Eren asks, taking a drag for himself, blowing a large cloud of smoke into the air. You nod to him through your coughs. 

You hit the joint three more times as it makes it’s way around the circle. With each hit, you feel yourself fade more and more. It felt as if all of your nerves were lighting up pleasantly at once. 

You notice your speech and movements became more slow and slurred each time you tried to chime in to the group conversation. Time itself goes out the window at some point, so you just lean back onto the carpet to feel your high, closing your heavy eyes. 

You notice your heart beat after a few minutes, it felt more forceful and rapid than usual - a bad side effect of the weed. It made you nervous, causing an uneasy feeling in your tummy. 

“Mmmm… Eren?” you murmur. 

“What’s wrong?” he responds, standing to look at you, concerned. 

“Don’t… feel s’good. Need you to take... care of me,” you plead. 

Eren sighs, picking up your limp body from the ground. You straddle his waist, your head resting on his shoulder, weighty eyes still closed. 

“I’m gonna put her to bed,” Eren announces. 

“Aww… Be back soon, ok?” Krista responds. 

You let out a groan noise at her comment as Eren carries you out of the room and up the stairs. He strokes your soft hair as the two of you travel. 

Eventually, you notice he’s carried you into his bedroom. You were a little bit shocked, you’d been in his room plenty of times... but never in his bed. Your heart was still pounding in your chest, the tense feeling still lingering in your stomach. 

“Eren? mmm… m’scared,” you say, still limp in his arms. 

“Let me turn the pretty lights on and get a snack for you?” 

“Mmmhmm… ” 

Eren reaches up to turn on the LED lights that lined his ceiling, emitting a calming blue glow. The walls of his room were filled with tapestries and posters, clearly meant to be viewed during a shroom trip. 

He lays you down on his soft brown duvet, and you feel yourself sink into his comfortable mattress. He helps you under the fluffy covers with gentle hands, taking some time to tuck your loose hairs behind your ears and whisper sweet nothings to calm you down. You loved it when Eren babied you like this, and being too high to think was a good excuse for it. 

He rummages through a box under his bed, pulling out a chocolate chip granola bar. He opens the crinkly wrapper for you, handing you a piece. 

You bite into it slowly, the sweetness was much more potent than usual. You find chewing on it to be so fun that you start to smile. 

“See, already back to your cute self,” Eren says. 

He turns on some soft music as you finish your granola bar, “The Spins” by Mac Miller being his first song choice. 

Eren settles next to the bed. “What can I do to help, baby?”

“Cuddle… please,” you respond. 

Eren crawls over you, settling himself beneath the soft sheets. He pulls you in close, your head finding a nice place between his neck and his chest. You let out a little moan as you adjust yourself. 

“You’re sweet, you know that?” Eren whispers, his voice sleepy and eyes half shut. He places a tiny kiss on your forehead. 

He plays with a little strand of your hair, twirling it in his fingers. He eventually moves his hand to massage your head lightly, your scalp tingling at his gentle touch. 

“Feel better?” he asks quietly. 

“Mmmm…” you hum sweetly, beginning to nod off. 

And you eventually do, safe in Eren’s arms.

༺♥༻

I’m in love with stoner Eren. Definitely gonna write all kinds of these (like what about Goth Mikasa x Stoner Eren that would be so hot bye.) Also I’m so sorry for the Historia slander I just needed someone to be jealous of :/ Hopefully you all think this was cute! Feel free to send feedback or a request! Love you guys! - Shep

༺♥༻

[hangovercurse]

Bad High

An innocent weed baking session turns into a nightmare

Reader x Colson Baker

Warnings: Drug use, anxiety attack, language

A/N: Consume responsibly kiddos.

Word Count: 1597 

masterlist

Colson knew it wasn’t your first time taking weed. In fact, he’d taken it with you before. But something in his gut told him that maybe this was a bad idea. It was weird, he had never thought weed would be a bad idea.

Maybe he should have listened to his gut. 

It was a pretty normal day in the MGK house. You and him were sprawled out on either side of his couch, your laptop laying on your lap and his guitar in his. 

“Okay, play it again and tell me if this works.” He looked up from his guitar, which he had been strumming for the past five minutes. 

You pressed play on the pre-recorded beats that you had stored on your laptop. As the sound started, Colson began strumming his guitar. The melody he played was nice, but didn’t quite match the beat that you’d already picked out. 

Once the beats stopped, he let out a sigh and threw his head back. “Why isn’t anything working.” He whined and you smiled sadly at him. You and Colson had been working together for years since Slim brought you to write and mix on Bloom. You’d seen each other at your bests and worsts, and this was one of those worsts. 

“Maybe its not the melody, maybe we need to adjust the rhythm. I can mix a new beat and we can start over.” 

“Y/N, we’ve tried 3 beats already, I don’t think its your rhythms, I think I’m just off today.” 

“Then lets take a break, Col. We can come back to it later. Besides, we’ve been sitting on this couch for hours and my ass hurts.” You chuckled, swinging your legs off of his and to the floor, pushing your laptop to the coffee table. “And I’m hungry.”

He frowned before leaning his guitar against the side of the couch and standing up. “Fine. I need to smoke anyways. “

You smiled slyly, an idea coming to you. “Or...” You started suggestively, “We could bake something.” Colson raised an eyebrow at you. “It would fix both our problems. We get food and we get high.” 

Colson chuckled, shaking his head. “And people say I’m a bad influence on you.” You smiled, getting to your feet. “But you have a point so, let’s do it Miss Badass.” He made his way to his kitchen, you trailing behind him. 

When you made the suggestion to make edibles, you forgot how much of a pain they were to actually make. But, an hour later you and Colson took a pan of brownies out of the oven. “I think we may have put a little too much in there.” He comments as the smell hits your nose. 

“I don’t think I can even smell the brownies.” You laughed as he took out a knife, cutting a small piece for you. 

You scrunched your nose at the size he handed you. “Look, Y/N, there’s a lot in here. I don’t want you taking too much. You’re literally tiny. If I give you more than this you’ll die.” He laughed as you took it from his hands.

“Have I ever had trouble holding my substances before?” You questioned, biting into the treat. The taste was just as bad as the smell, overwhelmingly weedy. 

“I’m not even taking that much, ok?” He said, shoving a piece in his mouth as you rolled your eyes.

“Fine, but if this doesn’t hit I’m gonna hold it against you forever.” You chuckled, heading back to the couch and flopping down. 

Colson came in after you, switching on the TV and grabbing one of the Switch controllers, tossing you the other one. “Mario Kart?”

“I will crush you.” You joke, facing the screen.

The first few races went by faster than you realized, and Colson had beaten you in every single one. 

“Okay, that was totally unfair. Who blue-shells a person in the last five seconds of the lap?” You pout as he laughs, still celebrating his fourth win. 

“Literally anyone who’s in second and has a blue shell in the last five seconds of the game.” You rolled your eyes as he played the next track.

You were both siting up at this point, very intensely focused on the race. The countdown started and you pressed the A button to go. As your car started racing down the track next to Colson’s toad character, the colors got brighter than normal. 

You started squinting, but kept playing. “Damn this shit hits hard.” You muttered as the world around you started getting hazy. You kept playing, but as you started your second round, your heart started to race. Your hands were pretty sweaty and the lights were getting too bright. 

What started as a pretty normal high was quickly turning into something you’d never experienced. Your chest felt heavy, like you were breathing under water. You felt like you couldn’t get enough air into your lungs. Your vision unfocused from the TV and your concern for the game disappeared as you let the controller drop to the coffee table. You could vaguely hear Colson’s voice, but the noise from the game was too loud, and only getting louder. 

You could feel your body shaking, but you couldn’t move enough to raise your hand and see yourself. 

fuck. What the fuck is wrong with me. What’s going on.

Your thoughts swarmed a mile a minute, and every inch of your being was overwhelmed with light and sound. You tried to turn your head to find Colson, but found that your movements were much slower than expected, too slow.

Eventually, your teary eyes made contact with Colson’s blue ones, and the joy in his face turned to concern in an instant. 

He rushed over to your side, remote forgotten. His hand made its way around you, pulling your body into his side. You buried your head in his chest as everything blurred and spun. 

“Hey Y/N. Hey it’s alright. You’re alright. I’m right here, okay? I got you.” You nod into his chest, tears falling from your eyes as you tried to breathe in. 

“It’s just a bad high, I promise. I’m not gonna let anything happen to you. Okay. Can you let me know what’s going on? Can I help you?” 

You had rarely seen him so concerned like this except when Casie was involved. You coughed lightly into him, trying to get some form of air into your throat. “Can’t breathe.” You muttered as you wheezed. 

“Shit.” He muttered under his breath, so soft you almost couldn’t hear it. Everything sounded like it was coming through a thick pane of glass. “Ok baby,” he grabbed one of your hands that was lazily wrapped around him and brought it to rest on his chest. He breathed in slowly and heavily, and then out. “Breathe with me babe. In.” He breathed in, and you tried to follow him, only to choke and cough. 

“Y/N, it’s ok. C’mon, try again.” He breathed in again but you couldn’t stop your labored breathing. Your chest was too tight to breathe in, so your body settled on hyperventilating. You shook your head as he touched your jaw, lifting your head to look at him. 

“Breathe with me, c’mon. In,” He breathed in again, and you followed, “and out.” You let out a short breath before sniffling. The light in the room got too bright, and you had to close your eyes to keep it blocked out, your head ducking back down but his strong hand held you in place, his thumb rubbing soft circles into your cheek. 

“I’m sorry.” You choked out, feeling guilty that you were ruining his high. 

“No, nope. You don’t have anything to be sorry for sweet girl.” His voice was soft, and you could feel his breath hitting your face. You opened your eyes slightly only to find his face mere inches from yours. “Keep breathing with me.”

The hand that was still resting on his chest rose and fell with his chest. You tried your best to mimic his breaths which fell on the bridge of your nose. You could feel your chest start to loosen up and your the buzzing in your head started to fade. Your eyes focused on Colson’s face, his eyes filled with concern watching your every move, his lips slightly parted as he continued to breathe heavily enough for you to feel. 

When you finally felt calm enough to speak, you whispered, “thank you. I- I don’t know wh-” 

“You don’t have to thank me for anything, ok? I just wanna make sure you’re okay.” His thumb continued to rub circles into your cheek and you leaned into his touch. 

“I’m okay. I’m sorry.” You sniffled. 

“Don’t say you’re sorry. Please. You have nothing to be sorry for.” His breath was still landing softly on your face. 

“Okay. I’m okay. Just a little tired now.”

He let out a light chuckle, “I’m sure you are.” He pulled you into his chest, his head resting atop yours and his arms enclosing you. “Let’s take a nap, yeah?” You nodded as you wrapped your arms around him, smiling softly.  

He leaned back onto the couch, pulling you down with him. It didn’t take long for you to fall asleep with your head laying on his chest and your arms wrapped around him. Colson stayed awake longer, watching you breathe with a small smile on his face. Occasionally he would lean down to press soft kisses to your hair before he finally fell asleep. 

[fleetwoodmak99]

Getting High with Eric Draven Headcanons

Alright so I know this one might not be in popular demand because there are so many different opinions on weed but from personal experience I have never had any issue with it. In fact, it actually really helps calm me down. That doesn’t mean that weed is for everyone. Plus I feel like Eric would be a fun smoking partner and its the 90′s so why not. 

WARNING: (18+) Smoking, Marijuana (If you are using this, please be safe and responsible), mentions of smut. 

Pre-Death Eric 

Pre-death Eric would definitely be a stoner and for years too. He started when he a lot younger than he probably should have been. Kind of just diving into it to get through the life of a young adult.

When he meet you and saw that you too were a stoner than he knew he would be hooked on you. 

Oh course he was a little concerned when he see’s you can out smoke him. It hurt his pride a little bit but it was insanely hot, he had to admit. 

As your relationship bloomed, the two of you would have smoke sessions together more and more. Eventually, when he asked you to move in with you, he would want to be doing it almost every night. 

Naturally, he would respect you if you needed a break from it. Completely understanding when you would get upset and agitated from not having anything in your system for a period of time. 

But when the two of you smoked together, boy oh boy was it a ride.

Eric’s favorite thing to smoke from would probably be joints but only could do so outside. Its quick to roll and small to carry around but it stunk really bad.

So when you two are relaxing at home after a long day, he prefers to smoke from the bong. It was powerful and easier to control where to smoke went but it was large and a pain to keep hidden. 

Either way, Eric loved it when the two of you would have your special smoke time. 

When Eric is actually high, it is hilarious. You swear, he should take up a job as a stand up comedian because he always has something sassy and raunchy to say. 

Biggest thing to remember about Eric is he WILL get the munchies. So its important to remember to buy way too much food at the grocery store in order to keep up with the boys eating habits. 

Eric would definitely be more lazy than paranoid. Which is good because sometime you can become overly suspicious of everything when you smoke too much. 

He would sometimes just want to watch tv or work on his music. He would get too involved in whatever his was doing, almost ignoring everything else. 

Eric would be so clingy. Like this boy would literally latch himself onto you and refusing to let you go. You could fight all you want but you always ended up wrapped around each other.

The clinginess would turn into him being insanely turned on and probably wanting to fool around. He would be more tender with you, not wanting to overbear you with anything, especially if you continue to take hits of stuff the whole time. 

If you wanted to make love, then he would be the most admiring and giving lover you would ever have. If you wanted him to fuck you, then be prepared to feel it the next morning. 

Basically, Eric loves to smoke and smoking with you is his favorite thing in the world to do. 

Post-Death Eric 

Post-death Eric is a different story. His views on the drug would still relatively be the same but he would see it differently.

Definitely would be more cautious on when he’s high and who he’s high around. Only really being comfortable smoking with you. Not liking feeling impaired as much as he used to. 

Eric wouldn’t even want to smoke alone. He would get too paranoid about the tragedy he had experienced and be terrified of it somehow happening to you. Not that it would because he is always with you to make sure it won’t.

He would probably encourage you to take more breaks. Worried you would get sick or how it would effect your body in the long run. He sees things differently now about health after being dead and knowing what’s on the other side. 

Eric would push the idea of eating edibles instead of smoking. It gave you more of a high and you wouldn’t be destroying your lungs everyday. 

Eric would be troubled when he sees you coughing so much every time you took a hit. Sometime you would gag, even throwing up one time because you would cough so hard. 

One thing he began to enjoy was just listening to music with you after a smoke session. After that high crept in and he started to listen to that sweet sweet music, he couldn’t help but get up and dance. Mostly likely asking you to join him. 

He’s a really good listener when he’s high. You always were amazed by the way he would explain things to you on an intellectual level without getting upset or defensive. 

Also he started cooking more. He said he wanted to expand his cooking pallet and sometimes being high inspired him to try new things.  

Speaking of which, he loves experimenting in bed with you when he’s high. It just makes it a whole new experience for the both of you. One better than he could ever imagine.

But smoking for post-death Eric isn’t a constant thing so only expect him to only smoke with you. Its your guys special time and he will forever cherish those moments he has with you. 

[thanakite]

Don't know why this has to be stated (though it does if only for the others out there being essentially gaslit by doctors) but the things done in a doctor's office are not always a clear indicator of how it effects you outside that office, and doctors will deny that is the case till they are blue if the face if needed, rather than actually acknowledge and address your issue

TMI below this point

I have a stress incontinence issue, which essentially means that when I cough, sneeze, etc. pee escapes me no matter how hard I try. I have done physical therapy for it, but with my other health problems, maintaining those exercises is hard on my body as a whole. Back in September (of 2021, to be clear) I had a set of 2 procedures done on me to "hopefully tell them what was going on"

These test were terrible, incredibly invasive, painful, humiliating, and complete and utter bullshit. At one point in these tests they fill up your bladder with cold water until you feel like you are going to burst, and then have you cough to see what happens (from there it is just as terrible since you then have to empty out that water in front of the person doing the test), but here is the thing though, this test makes no sense

You see, it is clearly obvious to literally anyone that has experienced an actual cough and a fake/forced (which really should be everyone, but if you've never forced out a cough because someone told you to, do it now, and compare it to the times you coughed for real) that an actual cough has much, much greater effect on your body than a fake cough does. There is a lot more force and pressure exerted when someone is coughing because of something in their lungs and throat or there is a tickle or anything else and when you fake/force a cough, most of those pressures aren't there, because your body isn't actually trying to expell anything or deal with any kind of problem

So this test, that was "supposed to tell them what is going on," will only work on someone with stress incontinence so bad that they are probably close to just peeing all the time, and since this test didn't show anything, because it relied on fake coughs instead of real ones, they basically shrugged and said there was nothing they could do

Actually worse than that, this doctor said, "Well, just try and cough less and see me in 6months if it is still a problem"

Fuck that! I even mentioned to him at one point that there is a difference between a forced cough and a real one and how I don't even have pee escape for every single real cough I let out, but he largely just waved me off

Yes, I do have an issue in that the only thing currently helping with my chronic pain and nausea is weed and the only consumption method that works for me is smoking (edibles, tinctures, pills, etc. Can all have very negative effects on my anxiety and are difficult if not impossible for me to get down and keep down long enough to be effective, and topicals rarely work and when they do it is for a short period, and not that effective because I can't cover my entire body in it), but I do so in the best way possible for me. I dab instead of smoking joints/blunts/bowls because that would require smoking for a much more extended period of time (which is bad for pain and for my lungs), use an electric device so I can do it at a lower temperature, and utilize a filter to keep a lot of stuff out of my lungs. All of this was explained to this doctor, who attempted to suggest the options that don't work for me and was given the counter reasons I can't do that above, which he said he understood, but still only wrote in my medical report that he suggested switching my consumption method, not noting the reasons I explained why that wasn't feasible, which also pissed me off. But yes, part of why I have a cough is that I smoke weed, but honestly, at this point, that is likely a minor source of the problem

The reality is that long before I started smoking at all I had a cough that just never seemed to go away. I produce a lot of mucus for some reason and a lot of that mucus can end up in or around my lungs, which causes me to cough and regularly have to clear my throat and hack up stuff as needed. As of now we are still not exactly sure why that is, and it doesn't appear to be connected to smoking because it never lessened when I had to stop smoking to determine things for medical stuff (which was pure torture and confirmed that weed was not doing anything but helping) and generally doesn't get noticably worse when I do smoke, in fact it was only better a few months ago before I put a humidifier in my room, and that was only because it was so dry, and even then it was only slightly less

So, I've got a chronic issue, not connected to smoking, that causes me to regularly have to cough with the intent it will expell the mucus trapped in my lungs, which usually activates the stress incontinence, an issue that I explained to this doctor extensively, and yet he still decided to act as if there was nothing wrong with me, that there was no evidence of it happening (like, bro, why would I lie about that?), that it was because of weed, and on and on and on doing everything he could to convince me that this was all on me, solely because a test that is not set up to work properly didn't give him the results he wanted

That is bullshit, but doctors do it all the time, they blame you because a test they ordered showed nothing, even when the test has obvious flaws and then they act as if you are at fault. Don't listen to them!!!! You know your body better than they do, you know what you are experiencing better than they do, and just because you couldn't prove it in a test done in a doctor's office where everything is controlled in a way that doesn't reflect how life actually is, doesn't mean your problem isn't still a problem

[banashee]

Part 1/2, for @hopelessly-me - enjoy! ♥

Kitchen Nightmares

Clint loves cooking. He is pretty damn amazing at it, too. Give him some time and he’ll whip up what the other Avengers refer to as “magic on a plate” seemingly out of thin air. No matter how simple or complicated, his food always turns out delicious. Whether he is cooking or baking, it doesn’t matter if they just got new groceries or if he is basically cleaning out the refrigerator. Clint’s food has truly spoiled them all, and when he is gone for longer stretches of time on SHIELD assignments, they definitely miss him for more than just company and bad puns. 

  The thing is, Tony likes cooking. He really does - he spends a lot of time trying to make dinner or hot breakfast, and the results are… Interesting. Oftentimes burned or stone cold with very little in between, unless you count his food being over- or under seasoned. Or any imaginable combination of forgotten or randomly added ingredients. 

To say that Tony is bad at cooking would be putting it very nicely. He may be a genius with a remarkable brain and way more PHDs than anyone really needs, but that doesn’t mean he is fit to be let loose in a kitchen on his own devices. Which, of course, doesn’t stop him from trying. 

Clint loves Tony, and Tony loves Clint. Which is why Tony wants to surprise him with a meal some days, on which he’s spent hours, trying to get it right. To be fair, he really puts a lot of love and effort into the whole thing, because again, his intentions are good, but the execution needs work still. 

As a result, Clint is choking down almost inedible food on a regular basis, because he recognizes the love and effort, even though he has suffered through more than a few awful meals.

So, it’s a thing.

  Whenever he catches Tony early enough, with JARVIS help, because the AI really is amazing, Clint casually asks,

“Hey Honey, need any help?” in an attempt to keep an eye on his boyfriend and keep the damage to a minimum. But Tony, bless him, without a fail will just beam at him and say something along the lines of,

“Nope, you go relax, I’ve got this!” and pull Clint in for a kiss before shoving him out of the kitchen to keep working in secret and almost set the house on fire in the process. 

Tony doesn’t “got this”. He really, really doesn’t, but Clint also doesn’t want to crush his excitement or enthusiasm. 

  While the interest and good intention is definitely there, Tony never had the opportunity to actually learn how to cook. Growing up, there were always butlers and chefs to take care of the meals, nevermind the fact that Howard Stark would have freaked the fuck out if he had found his son on a kitchen stove - that one incident when Tony was six had been more than enough, and he’d never treid again, up until he was an adult. All through college, he’d either lived on cup noodles or whatever Rhodey had cooked, and then there is that one time where he spent three hours on scrambled eggs, which caused Pepper to be worried about his well-being more than anything.  

So yeah, Clint knows all this, and he absolutely understands what it is like to have missed opportunities. He himself has experiences with that, although on a different level under different circumstances, but the point is: missed opportunities, never learned something as a kid, wanting to catch up - Clint gets it. He really does. 

This is why Clint lets Tony have his way, and silently pulls up the pizza delivery app on his phone, knowing they’ll more than likely need it in the near future. 

  Not even Lucky wants any of the scraps Tony cooks. The very same mutt who will dig through the trash can because it’s fun and there might be something edible in it, refuses to even touch whatever Tony is cooking. Lucky might come over to inspect it, but more often than not, he’ll just sneeze at the offering and leave the room. It’s kinda sad and kinda hilarious at the same time. 

Tony continues causing absolute havoc in the kitchen nonetheless.

  One morning, Clint enters the kitchen, running frantically because there is a lot of smoke. He can see the flashing lights and feel the vibrations of the extra loud smoke detector in the kitchen - all accommodations to his damaged hearing. Lucky is barking like crazy, and even though he woke up about 20 seconds ago, Clint is on his feet and scrambling, worried because there is smoke and the alarm is going off while Tony was not next to him in bed when he woke up. He needs him to be okay, because he doesn’t know what he would do without him.

“Fuck!” Clint is cursing and coughing, smoke stinging his eyes and creeping into his lungs, which is bad.

  Thankfully, as it turns out, the fire was relatively small and Tony is perfectly fine - he slips into his boyfriend’s frantic hug with ease, squeezing to reassure him that everything is alright - well, apart from the smoking pan on the stove and the wide open window. At least JARVIS has turned the alarm off now.

“Fucking shit. Are you okay?!” Clint asks, despite seeing so for himself and being able to hold Tony close to reassure himself that he is, in fact, fine and in one piece. With a heavy sigh of relief, he adds,

“Next time just set an alarm clock, huh? It’ll be evil still, but much more gentle than the smoke detector going off” 

“Yeah, sorry about that. I was gonna make eggs and bacon… Extra crispy, as it turns out.” 

Tony shoots him a lopsided grin, almost sheepish as he runs a hand through the messy mop of hair on Clint’s head. If the archer wasn’t so genuinely freaked out about his safety, Tony would have laughed. He loves early-morning-Clint, because he’s always rumpled and disheveled in his own adorable way. Especially before coffee, when he is a tired, grumpy mess and Tony wants to kiss him senseless every single day. 

Today, Clint is wide awake and sags into his partner in relief. The two of them hold onto each other for a bit, simply enjoying each other's company. A cold chill from the open window creeps into the room, and the smell of burned breakfast is slowly getting less and less. Small favors. 

Both men  look over at the pan, where nothing edible is recognizable as such. 

“Extra crispy indeed. Idiot.” Clint adds, fondly as he presses a kiss into Tony’s dark hair. It only makes him laugh. 

  Another morning, the kitchen is not filled with smoke, which is honestly always a plus, but Tony is standing near the stove, unmoving and staring as if he isn’t sure what exactly he is looking at.

Cautiously, Clint steps closer - thankfully, he already had a cup of coffee before his workout routine and is as much of a functioning human as he can be. 

“...Tony?” he asks, stepping closer. The man in question shakes his head slowly.

“It was supposed to be french toast.”

“...Okay?”

“It was supposed to be french toast.” Tony repeats, then sighs.

“I’m not sure what it is now.”

“So, uh… Wanna walk me through your steps to see where it might have gone wrong?” Clint asks, and he is looking at a defeated man. 

“The step is I’ll order breakfast online, goddammit.”

“Are you sure? We can make some together, if you want to.” 

“Yeah, about that, I kinda used up all the ingredients and fucked up too many times…”

A long beat of silence passes, and even the dog looks up from his pillow in the corner as if to say “Silly human”. 

“...Ordering online it is.” Clint agrees, and for once, keeps the snarky comments to himself. 

  One would think that the day would come where Tony gets discouraged by failure after failure - it doesn’t. On the contrary, it makes him want to prove even more that he can do this, which also means that he refuses to accept any help, determined to figure it out on his own.

Spite and stubbornness have kept him alive at more than one point in his life.  There is no way Tony Stark will be defeated by a simple breakfast recipe - or any other for that matter - again. 

So, one day, he greets Clint with a wide, toothy grin and a “taste it” as he shoves a pot and a spoon in his direction.

  And because Clint loves him, he does taste it. He only barely manages to keep himself from coughing, but he is not sure for how long things can go on like this. Sooner or later, he will have to sit Tony down and talk about this. He would love to encourage him to keep going, but the results and waste of food are too much to bear at this point. Not to mention the fire hazards.  

 *+~

 Prompt 16: "Taste it (evil grin)"

[that-freaky-mysterious-one]

Roll Some Mo'

Summary: Bucky Barnes x Black! Fem! Reader, When you and Sam learn of Bucky's night terrors, you two come up with a solution to his problem. What you two don't know, however, is that will create more problems than initially meant.

Characters: Bucky Barnes, Sam Wilson, and your beautiful self! <3

A/N: mentions and use of marijuana, slight swearing, this is my first fanfic, let me know your thoughts! :D

It was a little known fact that you smoked weed. The earthy, floral scent when it was fresh out the bag? You loved it. Tricks such as the Ghost and French Inhale? Mastered with ease. Not to mention all the afternoons spent bonding with Sam over funny stories about each other's lives. That's wasn't the main reason why you smoked it, though.

You had really bad menstrual cramps. You'd always had painful cramps, but as you got older, they seemed to get worse. So bad, you got sick and had to miss out on some missions, and there was no time for that. So when your best friend Sam took you to a doctor to get a weed card and to a dispensary one day, you had finally found a solution that worked. Though you used medical marijuana with CBD in it, you'd occassionally buy goodies with THC in it, so y'all got high and did all the fun stuff.

It was just you, Sam, and some cannabis against the world.

That's when Bucky crash landed into your lives. He was a bit rough around the edges and closed off to most, but once you sat down with him and got to know him, he revealed himself to be shy and sweet. He was so adorable!

You two had hit it off right away! He was such a sweetheart, and you just adored his innocence and sense of humor.

Then, he told you about his anxiety, and how Hydra had abused him. He told you about the night terrors he'd have, and how he'd never get a good night's rest.

That's when you got the idea to add him to your, as Sam called it, "Avengers Weed Fanclub," circle. You figured this would give him a chance to open up to you and Sam, and hopefully, sleep better at night. You wanted to let him know you truly were there for him.

So that night, after getting him a card and buying various products at your favorite dispensary, you sat him and Sam down on your bedroom floor, and taught him all you knew about cannabis, from how to roll a joint to how much of an edible to eat at a time.

"So, do you want to try some tonight before you go to sleep?" you asked Bucky, hoping he'd be open to this.

"Hell yeah," he exclaimed, making all three of us laugh at his enthusiasm. "Can I try the THC stuff, though? Just to know how it feels."

"My man," Sam said, giving Bucky a high five. "(Y/N), can you open some RAWs real quick while I grind these for Buck?"

"Of course," you say, as Bucky looks between you two, watching Sam open a bag of flowers and load the grinder with them, then to you folding your papers, then back to Sam twisting the cap back and forth, and finally, to him handing you the grinded buds to pack into the paper. He was totally lost.

He watched intently as you used your fingertips to pack the paper. You were tedious with your work, just to make sure every joint you made hit just right.

"Bruh, hurry up, it doesn't take that long to roll a joint." Sam said, obviously joking, but wanting to start smoking.

"Don't rush me, I'm not about to have an ugly lookin' joint that doesn't hit. My joint always look cute and always hit." You responded, earning an eyeroll from Sam and a chuckle from Bucky.

Finally, you added a filter and began to twist the paper closed in between your fingers. When you concentrated really hard, your eyebrows furrowed, your nostrils flared a little, and your lips did the cutest little pout. Bucky was intrigued by this, and he didn't know why, but he was just so drawn to your lips. Maybe it was the way your lip gloss made your lips pop.

But you were just friends. It was just a little crush, and he enjoyed being you friend. He didn't wanna ruin that.

It was after you pulled the final piece of paper closed and exclaimed "Alright, looks good," with that genuine smile that he loved that he snapped out of these thoughts and reached for the joint , careful not to ruin your "masterpiece".

"Have you ever smoked a cigarette before?" Sam asked him, wondering if he had to teach another person how inhale without them coughing a lung up.

"Yeah, I used to all the time," he said, putting the joint between his lips. "Mind giving me a light?"

You put a towel under the door, flicked the lighter with your thumb, and brought the flame up to his joint. You looked up and locked eyes with him, both of you holding each other's gaze. You weren't gonna lie, he was handsome. It was just so easy to love him.

You were just friends, though, and you didn't want to ruin that. You enjoyed his company, and you didn't want to scare him off with your feelings.

He inhaled deep, held the smoke in his mouth, and exhaled forcefully, coughing a little as he did so. All you and Sam could was give each other a look and chuckle to yourselves.

After a couple more hits, all he could muster up was, "Delicious," in a low, husky voice with a smirk on his face. You and Sam bust out laughing, because you knew it was already starting to kick in.

-------------------------------------------------------

After a couple of hours of smoking more joints, talking about Steve's hilarious past behind his back, playing UNO, and having a genuinely good time, Bucky said "I'm tired,", followed by him yawning.

"Yeah, it is pretty late," said Sam, yawning as well. "We should probably go to sleep."

You got high, but you never really had the symptoms of it. The red eyes, poor muscle coordination, none of it. You just became goofy as hell. You did get the munchies sometimes, though.

These two, however, looked burnt as hell. Both of them were slumped up against your bed, with red and droopy eyes. They were fighting sleep and were currently sharing their third bag of chips.

"Alright, well, 'night guys," you said to both of them, getting up to light a Nag Champa. You loved how fresh weed smelled, but after it was burnt, totally different story. So you used the incense to rid your room of the smell.

"'Night," they said in unison, both tripping over each other a couple of times before actually making it out your room, leaving you rolling around on the floor laughing.

Finally, you gathered the strength to get back up. After a couple of minutes of watching T.V., you blew out your incense, changed into a t-shirt, and climbed into bed, letting sleep consume you.

---------------------4 hours later-------------------

Your eyes blinked a couple of times, trying to adjust to the darkness of your room. Usually, when you woke up in the middle of the night, you had a certain gut feeling, and it was never good. Something just told you to check on Bucky. Just to make sure he was okay and still asleep.

So, you got up, put on a robe and some slippers, and walked to Bucky's room.

"Bucky," you whispered into the dark room, earning no response. "Bucky, you okay?"

You pushed the door open a crack, just to look in to see if he was asleep, but you saw nothing.

"Bucky?" you called out, walking into his room, turning on his lamp, and looking around, only to find nothing.

"Damn it," you whispered to yourself. Now you had a man who had never been high before running around the Avengers Facility.

"Bucky," you called out softly. You were starting to worry where Bucky was. He was supposed to be asleep, not be wandering around the facility. What if he left the facility? What if he hurt himself? "Bucky," you called out a little louder. "Bucky, where are you?"

"Dude, shut up. I'm trying to sleep," Sam said groggily, rubbing his eyes as he left his room to see what you were up for. "What are you going on about, anyway?"

"Bucky's missing."

"WHAT?"

"Shhhhh, I don't want to wake anyone else."

"Oh, so you can wake me up at 3 a.m., but everyone else is supposed to be able to sleep?"

"Can you help me find him?"

"No, I'm goin' back to sleep."

"Please?"

"Uh-uh."

"Sam, I'm begging you," you said, tears starting to prick your eyes from the worry taking over you. "Please."

He took a long look at you, rolled his eyes, released a dramatic sigh, and muttered a "Fine." This earned him a tight hug and multiple rushed "thank you's" from you.

"Yeah, yeah whatever," he said, patting you on the back. "Okay, you can stop now. If we don't find him, I'm takin' my black ass back to bed."

You guys looked everywhere. Well, maybe not everywhere. The facility was big as hell, and there was no way in hell you were going to search the whole base. You did, however, look everywhere you two thought he would be.

You searched the gym, the firing range, the lounge, etc. It wasn't until you went into the kitchen that found quite an interesting sight.

Did you find Bucky? Yes. How you'd found him? Well, let's just say when you two found him, surprised was an understatement.

Bucky was sitting on top of the refrigerator, eyes bloodshot, with the most blank expression, eating Sam's box of Cinnamon Toast Crunch. He was so fried!

" Oh, hey guys," Bucky slurred out. "How you doin'?"

"Bucky, how the hell did you get on top of the refrigerator?" Sam asked, pinching the bridge of his nose and shaking his head.

"It's kinda complicated."

"AND ARE YOU EATING MY CINNAMON TOAST CRUNCH?"

"Dude, chill. I'll buy you more in the morning."

"Sam, can you just help me get him down?" you somewhat whined back at Sam. You just wanted to get Bucky back to sleep so that you could do the same.

"Please come down, Bucky" you said, reaching your hands out for him like an infant wanting to be picked up.

"NO!" he shouted, frowning like a toddler and folding his arms over his chest in pure childishness.

It took awhile for you to get him down. With Sam arguing with Bucky on whether he should take his weed, and Bucky just being plain stubborn at this point, you didn't make any progress for awhile. You decided to insert yourself, telling Sam you'd take care of it and to just go back to sleep.

"Don't have to tell me twice. Good luck," with that, Sam was gone, allowing you to focus on getting Bucky down.

"Bucky, it's 3 a.m., how and why are you on top of the refridgerator?"

"I woke up in the middle of the night hungry, so I came down here and Sam's cereal was the one thing in sight, so I used the counter as a stepping stool to get to the top of the fridge, and since then, I've just been chillin' up here."

"Okay, can you please just come down, now?"

"Well, since you asked so nicely," he said with a smirk. "Yes, yes I will."

Bucky proceeds to somehow hop off the fridge, onto the counter, and finally, onto the ground before almost tripping. If you hadn't been there to catch him, he would've fallen on his face.

"Thank you," he mumbled into your shoulder.

"No problem. Now, let's get you back to bed."

Once you finally got back to the sleeping quarters, you bring Bucky back to his room, make sure he's situated, and then leave to return to your to room. You then notice as your walking down the hallway, you hear footsteps that don't quite match your own.

"Bucky, you have to STAY in bed to go back to sleep," you said not even turning around. You didn't even have to turn around to know it was him. He was the only still up aside from yourself, not to mention he was the only one still high.

"But I'm not tired."

"But I am, so you have to go to sleep."

"But I'm lonesome."

"When you're asleep, you won't have to worry about that."

"But I-"

"No more 'buts', just go to sleep."

"Can I just hang out in you room? Just until I get sleepy."

"Yeah, fine, whatever, just don't try to stay up all night, because I want to go to sleep."

"Yea! Thank you," he exclaimed, hugging you from behind and shaking his hair in your face.

"Shhhhh, you ain't about to be hollerin' all night, especially in my room."

"Okay, sorry"

You walked him by the arm back to your room, hoping he'd fall asleep as soon as you got him in.

"Okay Bucky, just, you know, fall asleep," you said, easing him onto the foot of the bed.

"Okay," he responded in a small, sheepish voice.

You leave to go use the bathroom one more time and get comfortable before you go back to bed, come back, and find him going through your edibles.

"Bucky, no!"

"Why do you have food on a shelf?"

"Those are edibles, and to hide them from nosey-roseys like you!"

"You should share these, man. They're delicious."

You paused for a good minute, inhaled deeply, approached Bucky, and said "Bucky, did you eat any of those?"

"Just a little piece, about a pinch." He said, shrugging his shoulders.

"Okay, just go lay down while I clean this up," you said, slightly agitated.

As you're cleaning, you hear Bucky whisper a husky "Damn, doll" under his breath. You forgot you had taken off your robe, leaving you in nothing but your panties and a t-shirt.

"Bucky, you're supposed to be sleeping, or at least trying to, not watching me."

"But you're so beautiful, especially without all that clunky junk you wear on missions."

"You think so," you say, laying on your stomach next to where he was sitting.

"I know so," he says, looking you in the eyes with his blood-shot, blue eyes.

"Nah, I think you're just high," you say laughing his "compliment" off.

"No, I mean it, really. You're a very beautiful woman," he says leaning back, laying his head on your butt.

"You just like looking at my booty!"

"Maybe I do. It is quite nice. It's like a pillow," he said chuckling under his breath.

"Are you gonna fall asleep like this?"

"Only if you'll let me," he says, looking up at you with his chin still on your butt.

"Bucky....get under the covers, you silly goose."

"Okay," he said as you both giggled at his actions.

You and Bucky got under the covers together and watched "The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air" reruns all night, or morning, long until you felt something laying on your bosom and you heard light snoring. You looked down to see Bucky had fallen asleep, and you were happy to see him finally sleeping, peacefully at that.

With that, you turned off the T.V., cradled Bucky's head to your chest, kissed his forehead, and whispered, "Goodnight, Bucky," to him, only earning a low rumble in return. Though Bucky may not remember it, this was one of the best nights of your life.

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #301

“i was waiting for my chance to find the light”

Did you like the beach a lot more as a kid more than you do now? Why/Why not? I did. Everything was more fun as a kid. I never REALLY loved it, though, because I did and still do hate the heat and walking through sand and getting it stuck all over you. It's pretty much torture now because I have extreme difficulty walking through sand. Has there ever been a time where you just couldn't stop crying? Explain. I know I've had days many years ago when my PTSD was truly awful where I'd sob multiple times a day. What's your least favorite time of day? Why don't you like that time?Late afternoon, like around 3-4 or so. By that point I'm usually bored senseless and going downhill. Do you like your lips? Do you enjoy kissing? They're fine, ig. And I mean yeah, if I'm really into the person? Do you like any music from the American Idols? Which ones? Ngl, I don't even remember any besides Kelly Clarkson, and who the FUCK doesn't like "Breakaway." Do you like when people challenge you? If so, in what? No, I get nervous about embarrassing myself. Personally for you, is falling for someone way beyond your control? It is entirely out of my control. What's something other than a fruit that you love in milkshakes? (Ex.twix ) Mostly chocolate stuff, haha. What is your all time FAVORITE milkshake? Ever tried the Reese's Blast from Sonic? That's some A+ shit. What's the latest you've ever stayed up reading a book? No clue. When having a peanut butter & jam sandwich, what is the best kind of jam? Grape. Do you like to write poetry? Yeah, but it's been a long time since I wrote anything. I used to do it aaall the time, but now I have to be seriously motivated and dedicated to the idea. When you get mad do you cry? Absolutely. Would you ever consider modeling? No. I do think one or two model-esque photos of myself would be nice and possibly help my self-confidence, but it's not something I'm seeking out and paying for. Are you scared of crossing bridges? Not very, no. If they're kinda sketchy-looking, I might feel a tad tense, but I'm not really scared of them. Would you consider yourself clumsy? I am unfuckingbelievably clumsy. Ever bought ice cream from an ice cream truck? Yeah, sometimes Mom would let me and my sisters do that as kids when one came through our neighborhood. Have you ever had a poem or story published? No. If you had/have a kid would you ever let them get a tattoo? If they were of the appropriate age, of course. And if they were getting it done professionally and not at some party drunk with friends. They better be in a sterile environment with someone who knows what they're doing. Do you love guinea pigs? Absolutely. I had three or four as pets when I was a kid. What is the worst thing you ever did that got you grounded? Probably run away from home. Have you ever been chased by a snake? No... and this is a misconception. Snakes don't chase. They go for what they see as the safest escape route, and sometimes they identify your own chosen direction as where they wanted to head, too. Where do you wanna work? I want to be a freelance photographer. What awards have you won? A lot of "A honor roll" trophies through school, among other academic awards. I seriously don't know what happened to that intelligence. I also have dance awards and lots of childhood sports team stuff. Would you consider yourself good at taking care of kids? I don't think I am, no. I'm way too nervous and awkward around kids. I've had to babysit for my sister twice though, and Ashley told me the kids had lots of fun and had no complaints. I guess like... I can do it, I am just very, very uncomfortable taking kids under my wing. I worry about leading them in the wrong direction. How old would a guy have to be before you wouldn't date them? I don't know, it would really depend on how much I was into the person. I generally stick with the approximation of a ten year gap though being my limit, so I think maybe him being in his mid-30s would make me feel a bit too weird. Be honest, have you ever tried weed? No, but quite honestly, I'd probably try an edible. I refuse to smoke anything for my lungs' sake. I'm curious if medical marijuana would actually be beneficial for me. Has anyone ever broken up with you with a note? No, but uh... I have, lol. It's how I broke up with my "puppy-dog love" boyfriend in middle school. Literally after he asked me if I was thinking of breaking up with him, and I said no before handing him the note because I was just too scared to do it to his face. I know, that was absolutely awful. Never, ever do that to the most innocent boy ever, kids. He didn't deserve that. Do you have sensitive teeth? Kinda. What was the worst thing you ever did to get detention/suspended? I've only ever had detention once for having too many tardies to my first class of the day in high school. We'd frequently arrive to school just a few minutes late because I was fucking impossible to drag out of bed. Have you ever suffered from post-traumatic stress disorder? Yes. Do you suffer from nasal allergies? Yes. What's your favorite kind of pudding? I only really like chocolate pudding. Have you done anything really interesting lately? I guess you could consider starting a virtual partial hospitalization program "interesting." It's not the intensive version like my first was, but rather being shorter. I just really need something to get my mental health back on the tracks. What’s the latest really fun thing you’ve done? REALLY fun? Hell if I know. I don't experience "fun" a lot at all anymore... I only ever feel like, this watered down, unenthusiastic sorry excuse for it. Have you discovered any good music lately? Oh yeah, I've found lots of 3TEETH songs I'm mad into. "ULTRAnumb" by Blue Stahli is also a total bop. How about any good new television shows? No. Or perhaps some interesting books? Nothing new, no. Have you picked up a new hobby or learned a new skill? I mean, within what timespan? Nothing lately, really. Has anybody ever done your makeup for you? Yeah. Do you own any sparkly items of clothing? No. What’s the most colorful accessory you own and use? *shrug* Do you enjoy drag artists’ work? If so, name some of your favorites. Oh yes, I have wild respect for drag queens. I don't know enough of them to have a fair favorite, but I do watch Trixie Mattel on YouTube and he is a goddamn hoot. What, right now, is the best thing in your life? Um. I don't really know. Probably the fact my mother still lets my too-big-for-the-nest ass to live with her... I don't want to picture how my life would be if I didn't have her still essentially holding my hand. What’s a place you like to go to when you need to get away for a bit? I actually love car rides for this, so long as I can ride passenger and just blare my music and not talk. It's so odd, being afraid of driving but finding great freedom and comfort in just... going. Do you like apples? I love apples. Anything exciting coming up for you in the near future? I paid the deposit for my tattoo appointment, so it was officially scheduled in May!! I was expecting an open date to be kinda far with just how amazing this parlor is, so I wasn't too shocked to hear I have to wait a few months, but man I can hardly wait. When you get an account for something, what's the first username you try? Unless it's for a "professional" site, in which case I'd use my actual name, I just about without fail with use "Ozzkat," or replace the "o" with a zero if that's somehow taken. Would you be okay with a friend wanting to date one of your exes? Which ex? What kind of accent do people typically have where you're from? Southern. Does history interest you at all? Can't say it does. What's something you wish you could do-over? There are many things, man. Is your hair in layers or is it all the same length? Neither, really. The left side of my head is very short/shaved, and as the hair goes around to the right, it gets longer. There aren't "layers," though. Is there anyone who you're afraid to be in a car with, if they're driving? I wouldn't say afraid, but with my sister's road rage and serious tail-gating issue, riding with her can make me nervous. What's something you're very good at? Um, I guess creative writing. Do you like sour gummy worms? oh FUCK yeah Would you pick up a hitchhiker if they seemed harmless? No. I am way too paranoid for that shit. Would you be bothered if your boyfriend liked to bite you? Uhhh I'm going to assume you mean this in a sexual context, in which case I don't care so long as it's not in a visible spot. How often do you get the opportunity to be completely alone? The answer used to be a shitload, and seeing as I'm in my room most of the time, I still feel like that's kind of true, but since Mom's cancer diagnosis and she had to stop working, she's usually home with me. I like it that way, though. Total isolation is bad for me. Do you have a trampoline? Nah, haven't in many years. What's your favorite Pixar movie? Finding Nemo. What is the strangest thing you've been asked? Something sexual that made me extremely uncomfortable. What’s the weirdest thing about life that people just accept as normal? The fact we put so much worth into pieces of green paper. What's the most random thing you've done out of boredom? *shrug* What show did your parents not let you watch as a kid? There weren't any specific shows that we even wanted to watch that Mom forbade us to see... I mean she certainly wouldn't let my sisters and I watch something like South Park as little kids, but none of us really sought unsuitable shows out. We were all about Disney, Nick, and Animal Planet in my case. What is the most pleasurable feeling that doesn't involve anything sexual? What comes to mind first is a big hug from someone who makes you feel safe when you don't anywhere else. What was your last "oops, wrong person" moment? I'm going to assume I sent somebody a text meant for another person. I'm super careful about avoiding stuff like this because I get horribly embarrassed, so it's difficult to recall the last time I slipped up. What do you find attractive that isn't considered "normal" attraction? Having a broad imagination and drive to create. What’s the dumbest thing you’ve done drunk? N/A What's something you really enjoy, but can't have? A pet tarantula because Mom refuses to let me lmao. I'm so into them now and desperately want a Grammastola pulchra. What Wikipedia article have you recently read? I haven't read any recently. What subject should be taught at schools, but isn't? Basic adulting and financial skills. What is the worst game you've ever played? I dunno. I've played sooooo many video games throughout my life. What tragic event was coincidentally beneficial to you? My overdose because it led to an intensive partial hospitalization program that totally changed my life. What did you think was cool when you were younger that you now think isn’t? Good question... What are your favorite or most memorable lines from any movie/show? I vaguely remember the concepts of some quotes, but not well enough to recite them. None that are seriously memorable or heavy pop up in my head now. What's a good example of 'Don't knock it till you try it'? Putting peanut butter on top of waffles with syrup. It is fucking delicious. What's your go-to get pumped up song? 5FDP's cover of "Mama Said Knock You Out" is badass HYPE. What's the dumbest thing your parents have said or done? Well, through a family assessment before my current partial hospitalization could begin, I very recently learned my dad fucking did drugs before my sisters and I were born, including shit like cocaine. That was great to suddenly learn. As for my mom... probably have a kid too young? She doesn't talk very much about her eldest daughter's history with (and without) her, but I know enough to know that was a very rocky time in her life. What are some things you wish existed? Cures for countless illnesses, and I also have SUUUUUCH a yearning for some kind of technology that could copy an image in your head onto a drawing device. If only I could draw how/what I see up there... Which person shaped you the most? Jason. Or Mom. What’s the one movie you couldn’t finish? Why? Couldn't tell you; I just haven't watched enough. What's a small thing you have a big passion for? Meerkats, quite literally with "small" lmao. What change have you made recently to help the environment? I have metal straws I try to remember to bring with me if I go out to eat. What was the hardest thing you've ever had to forgive? The way Jason left. Is there anything or anyone you're angry at, that you haven't forgiven yet? I sometimes question if I truly have forgiven Jason. I lean kinda heavily towards yes, I have, I'm just bitter about it all regardless. Have you ever plotted revenge against someone? No. Have you ever done anything to get revenge against someone? I can't think of anything off the top of my head. What is the greatest longing of your heart? To feel purpose. Who was your first love? Some guy in high school who "had" to talk to me upon seeing me the first time, only to wind up wanting to hear nothing from me later on down the line. What denomination is your church (if you go)? N/A What was the first year you voted in a presidential election? This most recent election, actually. Have you ever been afraid of the world ending? I used to worry it would happen in my lifetime, but now I don't. If it ends, it ends. I ain't got much to lose nowadays. What is unfair about your life? My mental health. My financial position. I'd rather not focus on the billion shitty things going on in my life rn, so next question. Did you write love poems when you were younger? ugh Who are you jealous of and why? There's a lot of people I'm in some way envious of, honestly. Have you ever had an account of yours hacked? Yes. Thankfully nothing major happened. Have you ever been a victim of police misconduct? No.

[utterlyinevitable]

Alrighty sooo we all know Becca but what about this woman named...Hannah in you WIPS? (and in my WhatsApp) 1,2,4,8,9,15,16,18,23,26,27,31,33,39,45,52,54,55 this shall keep u occupied lol

 *sighs* Hannah Hannah Hannah... when will I finish your saga 😔

i’m going to use both prompt lists for this and choose my favorite questions aha

1. What’s their full name? Why was that chosen? Does it mean anything? &  Age, Birthday, Star Sign

Hannah Amelia Weill

I really like writing complicated women with long names and multiple identities.

Growing up her friends all called her Hannie. She was always Hannah to her family and everyone who doesn’t know her intimately. One boy (’Bryce’) called her Han. Later in life her partner calls her Anna because of his thick accent. Her alias and the name she went by during her uni identity crisis was Leah, a derivative of her middle name.

I don’t like her last name so it may change to fit with the metaphor of the whole piece 🤷🏻‍♀️

The story moves between her being 16-18 and 23. 

tbh i haven’t given much thought to her birthday 😂 i feel like she’d be an edgy libra 

2. Do they have any titles? How did they get them? & Gender Identity

Nothing formal lol 

But her mother calls her a ‘hurricane’ and after high school that group of friends she had relegated her to a ‘selfish bitch’ and proceeded to cut her out of their lives without any warning. (side note: later in life she’ll realize she may have been The Toxic Friend) 

She’s hetero female. Though she was bi-curious with only one friend when she was 17. She leaned into that for a while but realized women just weren’t doing it for her. 

4. What is their relationship with their parents? What’s a good and bad memory with them? Did they know both parents? & Race and Ethnicity

She’s estranged from her father and hasn’t seen him since she was five. She’s an only child and had some distance between her and her mother because of socio-economic factors. At her core Hannah is a private, enigmatic person and her mother always kinda let her do whatever she wanted as long as she kept her grades up. It wasn’t a bad childhood or growing up. There were some rough patches but she lived in a bubble compared to the rest of the world. When she moved away her relationship with her mother got better because her mom would call or text her every week to make sure she’s alive. She still does and Hannah sometimes doesn’t answer so her mom calls. 

She’s white bread with European roots. 

8. Did they have pets as a child? Do they have pets as an adult? Do they like animals? & Weapon of Choice(?)

They had a dog which she loved and taught her the meaning of unconditional love. The dog even slept in her twin sized bed. As an adult Hannah is much to irresponsible (and self aware about this fact) to bring a pet into her life. She loves animals but keeps a distance and prefers the odd well behaved domestic pup.

She has wit, stoicism and psychological manipulations at her disposal. 

9. Hometown and current residence

She grew up on the waterfront in Suffolk, New York. Now she resides in Southwark, UK. 

15. Are they good at cooking? Do they enjoy it? What do others think of their cooking? &  Can they sing? Can they dance?

She can cook if she has to. She’s not bad at it when she knows what she likes but she cannot handle another person in the kitchen with her and gets so so so angry when they make comments over her shoulder. Some times she gets the urge to bake but it’s TERRIBLE at dough so it’s just a box cake or cookies. Others think it’s edible. 

When she’s older ‘Ethan’ teaches her how to cook fancy, complex meals and it’s rather meditative. And maybe she doesn’t mind having him in the kitchen with her. 

She cannot sing to save her life. She has absolutely no rhythm. Doesn’t stop her from doing either. Her go-to dance of choice is a drunken grind.

16. Do they collect anything? What do they do with it? Where do they keep it? &  Can they drive?

She doesn’t, well not really. She tries to hoard books but she’s moved around so much her moms outlook on life seeped in. Her mom always encouraged her to get rid of unnecessary things and so she has very minimal clutter (excluding her closet girl loves clothes). She does have a book shelf filled with CDs and vinyls and books and that makes her happy. 

When she’s settled down and has disposable income she starts to collect tattoos and street art. 

She can drive but doesn’t like to, especially in Europe. She’s thankful she lives in places with fantastic public transport. 

18. What’s their favourite genre of: books, music, tv shows, films, video games and anything else & Have any special keepsakes?

Books: she likes horror and drama as books she’ll read in public. When she’s alone she likes a romance book or young adult novel. 

Music: folk, indie and alternative. 

TV: comedy, drama, anything on the old CW was her jam. She likes dark humor. 

Films: romantic comedy. she went through a phase of only watching foreign films to seem more cultured. she’ll only watch action if there’s a comedic lead because blood and gore disgust her. 

Video games: she doesn’t play. never got into them. but she did try because ‘Bryce’ really loved his xbox and she loved ‘Bryce’. 

The one thing she made sure to take with her was a throw pillow that she’s had since she was a kid. 

23. Do they have a good memory? Short term or long term? Are they good with names? Or faces?

She remembers everything about the people in her life. For better or worse - it’s no bueno for her mental health because she overanalyzes everything and dissects it until she’s essentially fabricated a whole other reality. 

She misplaces things all the time and gets mad about it. ‘Ethan’ finds it an endearingly annoying habit of hers. 

She’s okay with names and better with faces. But she really identifies people by their vibe and how they make her feel. If she feels good she’ll remember every single thing about them. If they make her feel bad she’ll only remember the bits about that person that make her feel that way - even if it’s only one sentence out of an entire year of friendship, that person will become that one bad thing to her. 

She never truly forgets someone. Sometimes it’s better to pretend like she did in order to save face. 

26. How do they act when they’re happy? Do they sing? Dance? Hum? Or do they hide their emotions? & Guilty Pleasure

When she’s happy she can do anything! She feels like she can fly. She usually is listening to a song and she’s very creative in this space. She parades around in her underwear singing at the top of her lungs when she’s alone. When she’s happy and with someone, she lets her guard down and shows who she really is. When she’s happy she’s the person she wants to be and not the front of an unbreakable woman she’s been pretending to be since she was old enough to remember it’s importance. 

Oh yes, Hannah hides her emotions. it’s her MO. 

Her guilty pleasure is popular culture. ‘Ethan’ makes fun of her for it but indulges her any chance he can get. For the longest time he’s also her guilty pleasure. She doesn’t want to like him from the beginning. But conversation just flows. And he’s such a Good Boy. she can’t help but fall for him quick and quietly. 

27. What makes them sad? Do they cry regularly? Do they cry openly or hide it? What are they like they are sad? & What’s their family like? Who’s in it? What’s their relationship with them?

People make her sad. Failure makes her sad. She’s trying to cultivate a better life she’s read about in stories and feels like she needs to be successful to show up everyone who’s ever doubted her. She needs to be successful to prove to herself that she’s not a waste of space and worthy of this existence. 

But successful comes in all shapes and sizes. Which is something she’ll learn when she least expects it. 

Hannah only lets herself cry less than a handful of times a year. Usually in the dead of night or in the shower. And only when she knows she’ll be alone the entire time. 

After she falls for ‘Ethan’ she can’t control her emotions as well any more. He’s always there for her even if he’s the source of her tears. 

When she’s mad it’s almost manic depressive. She gets really really low and cuts people out. ‘Ethan’ will not have that. He will not let her go through this alone. Even if she doesn’t want him to see her or hold her he’ll still only be a short walk away. 

I think I answered this above ? Her family was her and her mom. They weren’t close growing up but once she moved away they both made an effort to keep in contact. 

31. Do they drink? What are they like drunk? What are they like hungover? How do they act when other people are drunk or hungover? Kind or teasing? &  What’s their current main conflict?

Yes. She chooses whiskey and scotch for the connotation associated with them. She cannot stand scotch but the commitment to the illusion is greater than her taste buds. Her new friend Polly introduces her to wine. She gets really bad stains on her lips from red wine and no one tells her this until she’s half a bottle down with ‘Ethan’ and he comments on it. She’s so embarrassed and rushed to the bathroom to wipe it off. He stands just outside the doorway laughing his ass off. 

She’s the kind of drunk that wants a smoke or sex. Sometimes both. 

When other people are drunk and she’s not she cannot stand it and avoids them. Unless it’s her roommates whom she cannot avoid. She’s teasing and loving and will be a complete idiot with them. 

When ‘Ethan’ is drunk she lovingly teases him and finds him so fucking cute. 

uhhhhh her main conflict during the entire series is trying to find herself. She needs to stop being the person she is out of necessity and be the person she doesn’t know who she is at her core. 

Then there’s the conflict of falling in love with ‘Ethan’ given the circumstances and how stupidly happy he makes her. And the conflict of still loving the ‘Bryce’ she knew back then that still gives her butterflies and plagues her thoughts and dreams and then comes face to face with her temptation after all these years.

The Enigma, The Boy and the What If 👀

this girl’s just trying to figure life out because she didn’t have a strict parent to map her whole life out for her. it’s a blessing and a curse compared to all those she grew up with and modeled her life after. She’s just off on an unknown adventure making things up and she goes and stripping the past from her future.

33. What underwear do they wear? Boxers or briefs? Lacey? Comfy granny panties? & How have they changed over time?

She likes hipsters but if there’s an ounce of a chance she’s gonna be naked she needs a v-string even if they make her feel constipated. As for bras she loathes them. But apparently she needs them because of her body type. So if she’s gotta have a bra it’s padded and sexy. She’s not wearing it for her it’s for whoever will see her in it. 

Eventually she’ll learn to love lingerie. For herself, not for ‘Ethan’. 

The Hannah Evolution is messy. 

A generally happy kid -> bogged down by having a single parent and the connotations that comes with that -> curating the perfect personality not to put strain on her mom -> creating an air of mystery and becoming an enigma. of never sharing her true feelings with anyone, even herself -> going after her dreams even if it pisses people off -> stupidly letting herself fall in love -> self sabotaging her happiness -> letting the facade crumble and rising from the ashes   

39. Do they like letters? Or prefer emails/messaging? & Your character walks into a cafe. What do they order?

Modern love letters are texts to wake up to and fall to sleep to. That’s something she romanticized with ‘Bryce’ and didn’t realize that meant nothing until ‘Ethan’ showed her. 

Cappuccino. Probably a lemon poppy seed muffin. Or if they do sandwiches it would be a panini. 

45. How do other people see them? Is it similar to how they see themselves?

Other people not related to her see her as arrogant and a closed book. She isn’t forthcoming and makes it really hard to get to know her on a personal level. That makes making friends in adulthood hard. 

Her ex-friends see her as selfish and fake and can’t deal with the drama that seems to follow her. They are actually really resentful for how well life was panning out for her once they all stopped being friends. 

‘Ethan’ is intrigued by her. She finds her brilliant and beautiful and he wants to know more about her. The difference is he’s willing to put in the work. He’s able to see the funny girl hiding behind the rogue exterior. 

She varies in how she sees herself. Some days she loves who she is and walks down the street with unwavering confidence. Other days she cakes on a face full of make up and becomes her alter ego. She’s never truly fully happy with herself. Something inside her is constantly looking for the next best thing to happen in her life and it is detrimental. 

52. How are you and your character the same? How are you different?

You can find the projection yourself 😅

I’m not as bold as Hannah. I also like to think I’m a little more lovable and have a better grip on reality than this mess. 

54. What does your character want, and what do they need?

She wants to be successful and shove her success up the ass of everyone who told her no growing up. She wants to be on the cover of Forbes 30 under 30. She’s creative and a bit chaotic and follows whims. She just wants recognition. 

What she needs is ‘Ethan’ and everything he’s opened her eyes to. 

55. What’s your character’s core trait? What’s their best trait? What’s their worst trait? When happens when these all interact with each other?

Instability. 

Her best trait is her drive. It’s a little shaky in the grand scheme of things but at her core she just wants the best life.  

Her worst trait is her tendency to write and cut people off without another glance. She does it swiftly and unapologetically. 

Gosh all of these things combined come out when she fights with someone and it’s terrible. There’s screaming and slamming doors and ‘Ethan’ doesn’t know what’s going on and wishes she’ll just talk to him. But she’s not that easy and he understands that but goddamn he loves her and for him this is worth fighting for. 

THE END.

[the-durin-boys]

Mushrooms..? -- Thorin x Reader

Howdy yall I hope you like this I got this idea when I was falling asleep and u know those dreams where ur like half awake and half asleep? It was like that, and I was dreaming about this. So I got up and wrote it. 

Enjoy!

--- The morning hunt was not as successful as it could have been, Fili and Kili only bringing back two small rabbits that would, in no way, feed fifteen people. Everyone was, of course, disappointed and hungry, but all had the better mind to not complain. 

So not the best start to your day. You knew that when you signed that contract that you would be going on an adventure where the next place that you sleep, eat, and drink, would not be known or assured, so of course you knew that there would be some days where there would be little to no food. You aren’t an idiot. 

But by the gods. This. This is just awful. Just a truly awful experience.

The day before the company of Thorin Oakenshield had been run down and then chased through a field full of hidden rocks and roots, the hunters being a pack of Orcs (again). This forced the company into hiding, without a fire, and without movement for several hours. By the time the Orc pack had left, it was far too late into the night to actually go out and successfully and safely hunt for dinner. Thorin forbid the use of a fire that night, so everyone went to sleep tired, cold, and hungry, hoping that the dawn of tomorrow would bring about food and peaceful travel. And as you can see, that is not how things went down. 

Balin rationalized the lack of game in the forest to the forest just being run dry by other hunters and hungry folk. So the day started off less than lackluster, and as the company slowly and hungirly packs up their bags, the Master Burglar, Bilbo Baggins, has an idea. 

“We could go foraging. For food that is.” He pauses and looks around the lightly wooded area that the company hid in. Bilbo’s hands are at his hips as he quickly surveys the trees. “There might be some edible mushrooms and possibly some berries that might make up for a lack of breakfast.” Thorin steps forward, a stern look on his face but a gleam in his eye. 

“Well why didn’t you speak up earlier?” Thorin’s shadow all but hides the poor hobbit, who can do nothing but squeak until Bofur claps a friendly hand on his shoulder. 

“Ah, he’s only jokin’ with ya, Bilbo! Now, what were you sayin’ about those mushrooms?” 

--

It doesn’t take long for a small pack of dwarves to form, and then they’re off, being led into the forest by Bilbo. Left behind in the camp are you (you have no idea what mushrooms are good, bad, and drugs), Ori, Thorin, Dwalin, Bifur, Bofur, and Bombur. You kept yourself busy, puttering around the little camp, mending clothing that needed it, filling up water sacks, the like. You always did little things like this, and thus, quickly became cherished by those around you. It had gotten to such a state where the others would actually jump on your chores, and help you out. A few even asked if they could do anything for you. You politely declined, saying that you enjoyed the work, and that you are grateful for something to keep you busy, as you never liked to dottle. 

“Thorin.” You approach the king who sits smoking his pipe. Thorin quirks an eyebrow up at your funny little mannerisms and sees a small, folded stack of (just washed, your friends are considerate of you.) clothes. “You have anything that needs mending?” The lilt of your tongue always surprised him, he doesn’t know why. There’s nothing too odd or off about the way that you speak, or the grammar that you use, and maybe it’s just because Thorin’s used to hearing the gruff sounds of words being pushed past bearded lips. That’s not to say that he is complaining, no, it’s far from that. Each time you spoke Thorin could feel himself being drawn towards you, and he just wanted to sit and listen to you talk. The feelings that Thorin feels aren’t absolutely unknown, just old and dusty from not having been used in many a year. You blink down at Thorin who only just notices that he’s being staring at your lips a little bit too long, with Dwalin trying to hide his laughter behind a gulp of water. 

“Ah, no. Thank you, (Y/N).” Thorin then busies himself with smoking his pipe, and looking at the grain of the wood which suddenly got very interesting. You purse your lips and look down at Thorin, but elect to say nothing to the slight quiver of his voice, and choose to turn to Dwalin. 

“Have anything for me, Dwalin?” Dwalin rests his hand on his back, and gives you a smile. 

“All good here, lassie.” You return his smile and move to a shaded spot under a little tree, leaving Thorin and Dwalin to talk. “So. Thorin.” Thorin takes in a deep breath and promptly sputters on the smoke. Dwalin snorts at watching his King and friend get flustered like a dwarfling over the kindest of the Company. 

“Leave it, Dwalin.” The sternness that Thorin was going for gets lost in translation as he chokes on another lungful of smoke, twice now. In one day. More in one day than in an entire year. Dwalin chuckles to himself but leaves the subject be. 

--

In the forest, the rest of the dwarves and Bilbo have successfully managed to fill several sacks with wild mushrooms of all assortments. Several times throughout the little field trip Bilbo was questioned about the different types of mushrooms, giving a variety of different lessons on the types of wild mushrooms (he thought that the dwarves would have known a bit more about forest living, but that’s quite alright.), and gave many reassurances that the mushrooms that they were going to eat would not in any way get them stone, killed, or in any other way affect their health. As the group not-so-stealthily makes their way back to camp, the air seems to lift and the thought of hunger is soon to be forgotten.  

--

The boisterous noise of the small group alerted the attention of you and the others at camp, and soon, you were up with everyone else to help distribute whatever findings they had. 

There was a long debate on how the mushrooms should be cooked - and if at all. The argument was that there would have to be a fire and that there would be no point in cooking them as it would only take up time, energy, and resources. On the other hand, the mushrooms should be cooked because it would be easier to digest and would bring out the flavor of the mushrooms, and that would be a pleasant change from the tasteless water soups and dried meats that everyone had grown accustomed to. Bilbo eventually settled the debate by saying that it would probably be best to eat them raw as while it was safe to ingest, the fumes would not be too safe to inhale. 

Each portion was dished out equally and the company sat and ate the mushrooms, thankful that they had something to fill their empty bellies, though something…..odd, started to happen. Only to you, apparently. About ten minutes after you finished your portion of mushrooms, all of the colors seemed...brighter? Your body adopts this new sense of freedom, like there’s helium being pumped through your veins and it’s lifting you off the ground. You feel the days, and the yesterdays, stresses melt off of you and you giggle. Just a little giggle. A few more minutes pass and the textures of the things around you start to shift and move, and for some reason, this sends you into a fit of side-peeling laughter, and in turn, this gets the attention of literally everyone in a forty mile vicinity. 

“What’s so funny lassie?” Bofur, your best friend through this whole thing, asks, eyebrow quirked and smile on his face. 

“I don’t even know! I-” Your face pales very quickly and you almost dry heave, clapping a hand over your mouth in an instant. The rest of the company, who was watching this entire ordeal, jumps to their feet at your sudden deterioration in health. Thorin is by your side in a flash, quickly pulling your hair out of your face as Bofur turns you so that you vomit into the grassy underbrush of the forest, gagging up the little meal that you had. All Thorin could do was gently rub your back and hold your hair while you topple forward, spinning where you sat. Thorin doesn’t know when Oin arrived, but he lets him take over and do his job, whilst he moves aside to watch. 

--

Oin had eventually declared that the mushrooms were the things that had this effect on you, but “not anyone else, which is as strange as it is fascinating!”, and it had been ruled that these mushrooms had a similar effect that one of his medicines had, and he had stated that while these mushrooms had no effect on anyone else, the makeup of the human body made it so it was more like a drug than a food, and that you had simply had too much and needed to let your system calm down and clear out, which would only take about twenty to thirty minutes for the initial high, and from there, he isn’t as sure. 

Fili, Kili, and Bilbo have tasked themselves with watching you and keeping you company. Bilbo does so because he feels at fault for this situation, even though he has been assured many a time that it was not his fault that you reacted differently. Fili and Kili stayed because the way you laugh at nothing is probably the most amusing thing they have seen in a long time. Bilbo eventually moved away, taking up the stitching that you were doing to make up for what had happened. 

You had been quiet for a few minutes, staring pensively off into the distance, eyes wide and full of an unknown knowledge, something that would probably be lost as soon as your high was gone. Fili and Kili continue to jest and joke, but stop abruptly when they here you sniffle. 

“Hey hey hey hey, (Y/N). What’s wrong?” Fili asks scooting a bit closer to you. Fili doesn’t know what he did or what set you off, but as soon as he said those words, fat hot tears burst and roll down your cheeks as you start to sob. Thorin, who was walking nearby, quickly walks over and stands above his nephews. 

"What did you do?" Fili and kili look panicked. 

"We didn't do anything!" Fili cries. "She just started to cry!" Kili is just as baffled as his brother, frozen and unsure as what should be done. Thorin sighs and crouches down next to you, gently taking your hands in his. 

"(Y/N), what's wrong?" You don't look at Thorin. "(Y/N)?" Thorin tries again by gently turning your chin with his thumb and forefinger. You blink up at him with big watery eyes and Thorin can only ignore the pang in his heart. "What's wrong?" You sniffle and more tears well up in your eyes. 

"It's not fair!" Thorin's voice is smooth and gentle, unlike anything Fili and Kili have ever heard before as they stand and move away from their uncle and friend. 

"What's not fair?" You almost start to wail, and Thorin moves a bit closer, his temple braids brushing your hands.

"You have SUCH pretty hair!” Thorin freezes but you continue. “And I can't touch it and I can't play with it and I can’t even say anything about it.." your voice breaks and your lip quivers. Thorin almost laughs but manages to keep himself composed. 

"Really? You think my hair is pretty?" You grip Thorin's hands in your own and lean forward.

"Very." Your expression is dead serious for only a minute before a wide smile spreads across your face and you laugh, letting your head drop into Thorin's shoulder. "I'm feeling' tired." Thorin doesn't even try to stop the smile from spreading across his face. 

"Then I guess you best be off to bed then, huh?" 

"I guess.." you hum into his coat, letting Thorin gently pull you off of him, but your already fast asleep in Thorin's arms, leaving a very happy Thorin, and a very confused company, behind.

--

Word count: 2,092

I hope you enjoyed reading! If you want to see something specific or see a certain pairing, feel free to make requests!

Love and best to all,

-ya gorl

[talesofasufferingwitch]

Weed and Ana Masterpost

Weed: The benefits, the downsides, and some general information that should be more universally known.            Because of the legalization of weed in Canada, and the imminent legalization of recreational cannabis in the United States (sorry UK, I am not familiar with your marijuana laws but I am assuming that you are similar with the states. Correct me if I am wrong).             There are a million and one different benefits of cannabis, but with every good thing we see in the world, there is an equal amount of bad. For thousands and thousands of years, women used cannabis to aid with menstrual pain and childbirth, as well as headaches, nausea, lethargy, and more. The plant fibre itself was used for clothing, building material, food, and even fuel. Within the last 100 years, weed has been criminalized and decriminalized, thrown through clouds of hatred and lies, and was used as a tool to harm an entire class of citizens.            But as we have seen recently, a lot of the propaganda from the “war on drugs” is being disproved. And now that we have easier access, we can get more information from this infamous herb. Pros and Cons:            CBD, (Cannabidiol), is a compound within Marijuana. It is the compound that most people associate with overall anxiety relief, pain reduction, and mental function enhancer. CBD also reacts chemically with Collagen, increasing the healing process of bones and joints. Because of the CBD within the weed itself, smoking, vaping, and/or consuming canabis is highly beneficial for mental health issues as well as physical ailments. CBD reacts to our natural Cannabinoid receptors in our brain; we all naturally create THC (the compound that gives us the “high” sensation), and allows our brain to secrete more serotonin.           Depression is one of the most widespread, yet least talked about medical conditions in America, and research is showing that cannabis can help relieve people. Compounds like CBD and weeds different terpenes restore normal endocannabinoid function, and potentially helps stabilize moods and ease depression. IN CORRECT DOSES cannabis can alleviate anxiety disorders. In large amounts, cannabis can cause anxiety. “Start low, go slow” is a fun little saying that we like to use in the cannabis industry when talking to new users.               For patients with ADHD or ADD, cannabis provides a more effective and safer treatment to aid focus than Ritalin and Adderall when using the correct strain. A strain that promotes focus and concentration (like Sour Diesel) is extremely useful in small amounts. Lets remember, the best remedies require the least amount.

           Not only can cannabis aid in remedying mental and physical ailments, it can help treat extreme addictions! Individuals addicted to serious drugs like heroin, opiates, and cocaine are showing promise in ridding themselves of their addictions through cannabis therapy. Weed is providing a safer and much more controlled means of getting “high” and aiding the rehabilitation process in alcoholics as well as people, such as my husband, who are at a high risk of getting liver disease. There is a small chance of becoming dependant to cannabis, but I will talk about that later.

           You’ll never guess whats coming next; weed improves LUNG HEALTH. Lung cancer and emphysema have been shown to regress when cannabis is thrown into the mix. The smoke is damaging to the lungs, so to avoid that damage, ingesting cannabis via edible, tincture, or vapor is the safer alternative.

           Cognitive degeneration is pretty much unavoidable, but the good news is that studies are showing cannabis can stop the progression of Alzheimer’s.

           Cannabis reduces pain, spasms, nausea, PTSD, headaches, and asthma. The herb works as a bronchodilator, so when vaped or eaten, those suffering with asthma have better control of their coughing fits. However, it can lower blood pressure, but beware because it can lower blood glucose levels as well and spike hypoglycemia (again I will talk about later). 

The Economic benefits of cannabis: It can be used as a food source as a source of protein! It is used to create protein powders, and seeds can be purchased for consumption. It is creating new industries, cultivation, processing, sales outlets, and there will be more to come as legalization continues across the world. Traffic deaths have gone down, people are succumbing to the substitution effect; people are choosing pot over alcohol. 

Cannabis can help your pets, offering relief from pain and anxiety. It helps bad dreams, as it impacts the REM sleep part of the cycle, the part of the cycle where you dream. Those with chronic fatigue syndrome are effectively treated with certain cannabis compounds, terpenes, and strains, and on the flip side with other strains it can help you sleep.

Precautions: Weed is not for everybody. Mental health professionals warn against people with Bipolar Disorder and Psychosis from consuming. This is again, all individual. It is up to the patients discretion.            Those with family histories of schizophrenia, psychosis, multiple personality, and other personality-based disorders may pose the risk of bringing them on in themselves. 1 in 4 cannabis users with such a family history have said that their symptoms only appeared after smoking weed. We do not know, as this is anecdotal evidence. Hopefully more will arise as we are able to do more studies. A curious finding among people with schizophrenia and other pshychoses is that a history or marijuana use is linked with improved performance on tests assessing learning and memory.

           Despite what everyone tells you, weed is addicting, but not in the way you think. People become dependant on cannabis, not addicted. The reason why is not so dissimilar to someone to takes Advil everyday or prescription medication, it makes life … better. People become “dependant” on it because of the many benefits it brings to an individuals life, including my own. People get “bitchy” and “moody” without it because weed is a mood stabilizer and we would be “bitchy” if it wasn’t for cannabis in the first place.

Ending the stigma: People go around saying that cannabis decreases productivity and motivation levels. This is simply false. For lots of people, the medical benefits gained from cannabis (like pain management and mood management) make them more productive! Stoners burn approximately 1.3x the amount of calories on average that a non-user does, and even though stoners are shown to consume higher amounts of calories, the food choices are often better. We see a lot of the “junk food munchies” posts making fun of it, but in reality, stoners are more likely to make more consistent healthier food choices. 

Weed and ED; choosing what is right for you:            Cannabis users have been shown to be slimmer on average than non-users. This is because cannabis helps the body regulate insulin production, and manage caloric intake more efficiency. A common use for medical cannabis is to help regulate eating patterns. Whether you eat too much or too little.           Precautions: those of us struggling with an eating disorder where we are not taking in the correct amount of calories can be subjected to one of the absolute worst feelings in the world; hypoglycemia. Blood sugar (due to marijuana’s insulin response) and blood pressure drop considerably. You get nauseous, dizzy, confused, and HOT. Clammy, feeling like blacking out hot. This is dangerous. Always make sure that you have something around you, be it a Gatorade or a protein bar. You could die.

So now, how do you choose the right strain for you?           Terpenes: Terpenes are the flavour or smell of the weed you have. These are what differentiate the strains from one another, other than of course the basic indica vs. sativa argument. The terpenes are what cause the main benefit differences too, some promote relaxation and stress-relief, while other promote focus and acuity. The main terpenes are: Limonene, Pinene, Caryophyllene, Myrcene, and Linalool. Now, if you don’t know the difference between sativa and indica, here you go;            Sativa effects are more invigorating, uplifting, cerebral, and pair well with physical activity, social gatherings, and creative projects. Indica provides a more relaxed, physically sedating “couch-lock” feeling and is best before a movie or bedtime. Indica also is the strain that is said to promote “munchies”.            The ONLY reason these two differ, as every strain is a hybrid of the two, is the terpenes and cannabinoids.             If you go to smell something you like, does it smell citrusy? (Limonene) Or floral? (Linalool) Or is it spicy? (Caryophyllene) Does it have a musk? (Myrcene). Everything has a scent profile, and that consists of these terpenes. Me specifically, I love my citrusy and earthy strains, because that is what flavour profile sits with me best. They give me energy and don’t give me the munchies, unlike an indica strain which would commonly have Linalool, which is most commonly found in lavender, and is more relaxing.

            So, to pick the right strain for you. Start low, with a low dose (smaller bowl) and lower THC content if you can see the content. If you want to buy legally, you have the option of discussing your concerns/questions with one of the retail members there. There is exstensive training for Canadian employees so depending on who you talk to, you can get a lot of information! Decide whether you want an energizing or sedating effect (but I will warn you, Indica is KNOWN for the munchies. Sativa’s I find do not give you that appetite stimulation as much, only specific strains). And, if you can, keep a journal of the strains you’ve tried and liked. That will help you choose in the future. 

So, dealing with the munchies.            If you did pick a strain that is an appetite booster (Leafly.com is an amazing reference to see the terpenes, and overall benefits of the strain you are choosing), or if you just so happen to get the munchies (me, beig a seasoned stoner do not get that appetite boost as often anymore), here are some tips to deal with it:            -Always have a way to distract yourself. Be it tumblr, video games, sleeping, anything. Food tastes amazing while high, but music sounds just as good as the food tastes. Let your other senses wander freely            -Have a safe snack food, one low in calories. I have the tendency to crave salt, so I have those Special K brand crisps that are 80 calories for 27 of them. One whole bag is less than 500 calories, so I know I have a safe food.            - Smell something minty or sweet, it will trick your brain into sending the satiety signals. My favourite is a peppermint and grapefruit mix.            - Brush your teeth and floss. I love the feeling of a clean mouth, and honestly, we all don't do that enough.            -And most of all, know yourself. Know the strain and how it makes you feel. If you know it gives you munchies, try having tea and coffee a couple times during your high, or make preparations to avoid eating. It sounds odd, but it is actually comforting to pay attention to your own triggers and what you need.

          If you are new to using, here’s a few tips. Always try it with a trusted group of friends, you never know how you will react. Small bowls if it is a bong, stick to one puff/bowl until you know how you are reacting, takes a couple minutes to fully set in, but a couple seconds to feel it. Holding it in longer does not make you more high, that is a lie. The THC passes the blood barrier within seconds of entering the lungs. The reason why you may feel more high is because 1) your brain is not getting any more oxygen, and so of course you will feel light headed. That happens any time you hold your breath. 2) holding it in will probably make you cough, because it is an irritant to the lungs because it is smoke, and coughing opens up the lower chambers of the lungs and allows the smoke to touch more surface area, therefore absorbing faster. Don’t listen to anyones lies, exhale that bigass cloud be a baller, astound the with these FACTS.           If you are trying edibles/oils, only take one dose, and wait at least an hour. Trust me when I say that you will melt into the couch and it will not feel as comfortable as you think. Being stuck inside your head for 8+ hours is not how I like spending my time, thank you very much. I assume you think the same.           Never be afraid to ask questions about origin or reach out to someone with your concerns. One day being that aware and cognizant of what you are experiencing could save your (or someone elses) life.

           All in all, weed is an amazing gift that the world has given us to use. But with everything we are given, we also have a responsibility to use it wisely and within our means. And as with every gift, there is also a price to pay. It is not in itself inherently evil or good, it is how we use it. 

With much love,

Your friendly neighbourhood witch.

[pemini]

Masked | Mark Lee

「 every ‘what if’ and ‘I wish’ amounted to him 」

⇢ Word count: 3,103

⇢ Genre: fluff, comedy, some angst

⇢ Warnings: swearing, fire

⇢ Pairing: Spiderman!Mark x reader

You have always been a terrible cook. Your mother's failed attempts to teach you how to cook rice back when you were thirteen brought that to light. The first time, the rice burnt to literal ashes, and the next, it was barely edible. At sixteen, you tried baking a cake for your best friend Donghyuck’s birthday, only to end up being seconds away from burning your house down. It was no surprise to anyone, but yourself, when one of your culinary endeavors really did result in flames. It was in your and Donghyuck’s shared apartment, at the age of nineteen.

You and Donghyuck had known each other since you were born. The two of you proudly boasted that fact with the framed pictures of both of you in diapers, bathing in the same tub, celebrating your birthdays together and graduating highschool in the same class all placed around your apartment and hung up on your walls. In first grade, Donghyuck became friends with Mark, resulting in great jealousy on your part, because Mark was “stealing” your best friend. That problem solved itself, and the three of you became inseparable. Mark made frequent appearances in the pictures around the house, as well as your apartment itself, since he spent more time in it than in his own. Despite your apartment being his second home, he refused to live with you and Donghyuck, partly because you were both extremely messy and loud, but also because he knew he would “get sick of you” if he saw you that frequently. At least, that’s what his excuse was.

Mark was an extremely busy nineteen year old. In fact, you would argue that he’s too busy for a nineteen year old. With him being a biochemistry major, it was no surprise. His apartment was littered with notes and diagrams and he rarely left his home without at least one of his textbooks, in case he had some time to do some extra revision. On top of all the studying, he always seemed to be at the gym. It was almost as if his own home was a pit stop between school, the gym and you and Donghyuck’s apartment. It was never a surprise when he cancelled on study sessions and arcade hangouts last minute, at some point you stopped asking why and simply blamed it on his busy schedule.

It was just past sunset when you decided to bake cupcakes, for no particular reason but sheer boredom. Donghyuck was holed up in his bedroom playing video games and Mark was too busy to come over, leaving you to entertain yourself. You looked up a recipe online, making sure to add “for beginners” at the end of the search. After all, you weren’t completely unaware of your talent for messing up your cooking- but, you were optimistic. Hence, you choosing to bake for fun in the first place. Two hours of “perfecting” the (awfully clumpy) batter later, the tray went into the oven. You patted yourself on the back for your efforts, and smiled at the thought of the perfect cupcakes that you would rub in Mark and Donghyuck’s faces in half an hour. Five minutes later, you were sprawled out on the couch, fast asleep. Not long after, your slumber was interrupted by Donghyuck’s frantic screams and the deafening sound of the fire alarm. The kitchen was in flames. Donghyuck was emptying water bottles on the growing fire while shouting at someone on the phone. He was a great multitasker.

“That dumbass tried baking and fell asleep, who the fuck does that? She hasn’t even woken up.” You bolted up from the comfort of the couch, now in complete panic, and began running around the two bedroom apartment in search for a fire extinguisher. You could hear Donghyuck’s obnoxious voice over the blaring fire alarm and the sound of the approaching firetrucks, which did not help your case.

“I am literally going to burn to death because I’m roommates with a crackhead who can’t cook, I’m going to die, Mark, this is how I die-“ In the midst of his rant and water bottle emptying, his sleeve caught on fire. His voice had already risen up three octaves and his water bottle supply was proving useless, and now the poor boy was on fire. “Y/n- Oh my God, where the fuck are you?”

“I found the fire extinguisher, I’m coming- fuck, wait-“ You screamed back, scrambling into the kitchen and tripping over your own feet. You looked up to see Donghyuck flailing around wildly, which would’ve made for great entertainment if you weren’t trapped in an oven.

“Hurry up I’m on fire I’m burning I’m going to die- Mark! He hung up, I’m going to die alone-“ Just as you began extinguish him, you heard the sound of shattering glass, followed by the sound of the door being busted open as firefighters stomped into your apartment.

You froze in place, the orders barked by the firefighters barely processed in your mind, the smoke settling into your lungs and your watering eyes proved to be too much of a distraction. Your breathing had long sped up, shortened and frantic, you could barely see your own hands amidst the smoke. Just as you were about to break into full panic, you felt a pair of steady arms wrap around your waist. Mere seconds later, you were lifted off of the ground in someone’s arms, with your cheek flush against their chest. You were faced with New York City’s landscape, the buildings that towered over you were now at face level. The night was no darker than usual; not quite moonlit, yet not as artificial as it seemed to be. For a second you could see the silhouettes of strangers inside the buildings surrounding you, the potential wonder of “can they see me to?” Had no time to be fulfilled, as you closed your eyes and screamed as if it would change the fact that you were already midair. You were dangling between buildings in the strangers arms, not flying, just dangling. You held your savior closer, mumbling prayers for safety.

“You okay?” The male chuckled. His laugh reverberated through his chest, eliciting chills in your entire body. The familiarity of his voice silenced you. It was warm; soothing, almost making you forget about your situation. You finally took a moment to breathe before opening her eyes, only to be greeted by a vibrant mask.

“What the fuck,” You exhaled, studying the mask’s large white eyes and its web detailing. “you’re Spiderman?”

“Yes, I’m Spiderman.” He giggled. “And you are?”

“I am a big fan.” You let out a clumsy combination of a sigh and a giggle, “and you’re Spiderman.”

“Yes, I think we’ve already gone through that.” Just as those words left his lips, the wind stopped blowing through your hair and the comforting pressure of his arms around your waist ceases. He gently placed you back on the ground, and although you failed to notice the close proximity, you were mere centimeters apart and his hand lay resting on your waist. You forgot your arms still laying on his shoulders with your fingers tangled behind his neck, too distracted by the warmth of his body and the faint outline of the eyes behind the mask. As well as the shock of being meters above the ground and caught in a fire minutes earlier.

“What the fuck?” Donghyuck’s voice snapped you out of your daze. The hand on your hip suddenly felt heavy, as well as your newfound awareness of your arms around the superhero’s neck. Both of you hastily pulled your hands away from each other, placing them awkwardly at your sides as you turned to Donghyuck. “So, you’re telling me that the Spiderman had the time to save you out of a burning building, but I was left to burn to death?” He pointed his finger accusingly, first at you, then Spiderman, and then placed it solemnly on his chest. You reminded yourself not to roll your eyes- just to save yourself from another influx of drama.

“I have two hands, and I doubt you would’ve enjoyed hanging onto my leg.” He laughed, stretching his arms as he spoke. “Besides, you look fine!” The way his shoulders shook when he laughed could’ve given you deja vu. His movements, his scent and the wight of his arms that were once around you formed into an unknown syllable at the tip of your tongue. It was as if you’ve collected every puzzle piece, yet couldn’t fit any of the pieces together.

“Sure, whatever. I’m gonna go call Mark so he can pick us up. We’re staying over at his place tonight.” Donghyuck said. He looked you up and down, smirking to himself. “Too bad you can’t get changed.” Your eyes widened the second you looked down at what you were wearing. Your oversized 2011 Justin Bieber t-shirt with matching purple pajama bottoms and crocs were your go to stay in outfit. In your defense, you could have never predicted that your kitchen would light on fire and that Spiderman would break in and save you. Yet in that moment, you still deeply regretted buying those pajamas back in 2011.

Much to your discontent, Spiderman directed his attention to your clothing as well, laughing. “I know I just saved you out of a burning building and all, but are you really wearing crocs?”

You scoffed, lightly pushing his chest. “They’re comfortable! You’re wearing spandex.”

Just as he was about to reply, the song Love Yourself by Justin Bieber started playing. Right from his spandex pocket. Spiderman glanced at you briefly before he took the phone out of his pocket, reluctantly answering the phone call. The syllable caught in your tongue turned to a word, the puzzle pieces slowly clicking together. You could hear Donghyuck’s voice on the other end, talking about staying over for the night.

“Mark?” He turned to you at the mention of the name, telling Donghyuck he would be on his way and ending the call. His head was hung low as he took a few steps closer to you.

“That’s me.” His replied. The confidence that radiated off of him ceased, instead replaced by tense shoulders and fidgeting fingers. “Can we talk somewhere else?”

The walk to wherever Mark was taking you was silent, an unusual contrast to almost every moment you spent together. Mark was in a constant fit of giggles over something you said or did, and vice versa. Every conversation you had led to another, and you were both convinced the you would never run out of things to talk about. Every word between you was already said, except for three words you kept dear to yourself. Mark meant a lot to you, more than you would like to admit. At some point, you considered it almost embarrassing how big of a role he played in your life. The situation in which you met was nearly as awkward as this one- the cliche ‘guy spills coffee on a girl in a café, promises to make it up to her, they end up as lovers’ trope- except, you were not lovers. Although, the line between best friends and lovers was terribly blurred in everyone else’s eyes, (especially Donghyuck’s, who never misses the little smile dancing on your lips when Mark says something stupid, or the way Mark’s eyes shine when you trips over your words.) neither of you noticed that there should have been something more in your story. The coffee spill should’ve lead to a date, which should’ve lead to a kiss, which should’ve lead to more. Alas, your story was never meant to be generic, and at the point you were at, there was no changing it.

Mark lead you into a secluded alleyway, pressing his back against the wall with a sigh. You stood in front of him, the past events replaying in your mind all to form a singular question. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I wanted to- I swear to God- there were so many times when I was alone with you and I just wanted to tell you but I- I couldn’t do it.” At that moment, everything about him screamed uncertainty. From the tapping of his foot and his fidgeting fingers, to his shaky voice. You’ve known Mark longer than you’ve really known yourself, yet you’ve never seen him like this- so insecure, so.. apprehensive. You could tell he had stressed about this exact moment millions of times before, that the outcome could break him. “I don’t want you to see me differently.”

“Mark, this doesn’t change how I see you- ” You paused, taking a moment to collect your thoughts. The same way this exact moment clouded his mind daily, it made home in your mind as well. Thoughts about the day you tell Mark how you feel were constant. They took place in a considerable amount of your daydreams, they intruded your less stressful thoughts while you conversed with Mark, and they occasionally popped up when you should have been focusing in class, only making it harder for you to pretend that you were fine with being “just friends”. In fact, the thought of you and Mark being nothing but friends, the thought of watching him fall in love with someone else, that thought clung onto your lungs like an iron fist and you were just about to run out of oxygen. “You’re my best friend. I don’t care if you’re half spider, or whatever. I just want to be there for you, can’t you see that? I do everything I can just to show you how much I care about you- how much I fucking love you- and it just feels like a waste, because you weren’t even honest with me. You hid half of your life from me, Mark, and it hurts.”

“You love me?” He barely whispered, his body went still, looking at you through his mask expectantly. The fist around your lungs tightened and you could feel your heart drop right beneath your feet. The silence that followed his question felt like an eternity, you could hear every flicker of the street lamps and every laugh from every stranger passing by the alleyway, yet it felt like it was just the two of you. To you, the world had stopped entirely and it lay in his hand. After he decided the silence dragged on long enough, he pushed himself off the wall and took a few gradual steps towards you. “Do you want to take it off?”

“What?” His question was, needless to say, unexpected and confusing, though somewhat unsurprising; Mark had a tendency of switching between one thing to another at pace that’s hard for the average person to keep up with. You repeated the question in your mind and your mouth went dry as you stared at the outline of his eyes, hands shaking. Mark reached out and put your hand in his, lifting it up to his cheek.

“Take the mask off, I mean.” He chuckled, yet you could practically sense his nerves from miles away, betraying his confident demeanor. With his assistance, you traced your fingertips down to the edge of his mask, right at his jaw, and carefully tugged it off of his head. That night, was when you saw him for the first time, really saw him for all that he is. And at that moment, he was doing anything at all, but you could’ve sworn that his eyes held all the stars you’ve ever seen. His disheveled hair, up in angles that would’ve made you laugh if it weren’t for the current situation framed his face perfectly, and it was like your hand had a mind of its own when you reached out to run your hand through it. The light sheen of sweat covering his face only made him look so much more angelic under the moonlight. And his lips, curled up into the little smile you’ve grown to love so much. You barely noticed his face inching closer to your own, too caught up in his eyes, his lips, him. Before you could remind yourself to breathe, after noticing your breath had been caught in your throat for the past minute, his eyes were closed and his lips were on yours and you knew you would never again worry about what should have been. Every ‘what if’ and ‘I wish’ amounted to him with his arm around your waist and his hand placed your cheek, and you knew you have found your forever in the taste of his lips. He pulled away too soon.

“I love you too, y/n. I love you so, so much and I’m so sorry. I know I should face told you, I just- the thought of losing you was eating at me and I was so insecure and afraid and I am so sorry, please don’t be mad at me, I-” You cut his rambling off with a kiss, his wide eyes and furrows brows melting your heart, you could feel him smile into the kiss. You both broke into a fit of laughter mid way, starry eyes on each other with puffy lips, and he couldn’t help but cup your cheeks and smother you with kisses till you could barely breathe. You found heaven.

The too familiar tune of Love Yourself by Justin Bieber blared from his pocket once again. Your laughter died down, “Let’s go get Hyuck before he beats us up.” He said, taking hold of your hand and starting to lead you out of the alleyway.

“Mark, your mask.” You reminded him, only to earn a shrug and a “fuck it” in return.

“It’s okay, I’m going to tell Hyuck about it, too.”

“No, I mean there’s news reporters outside our apartment building, you really don’t want them to know you’re Spiderman.” You flicked his forehead lightly and handed him the mask. And with that, he quickly placed it back onto his head, and walked with you, hand in hand, into the city, and into your long awaited- not so generic- love story.

“As if I didn’t already know, it was obvious as fuck. I thought y/n would catch on sooner.”

“Come on, Hyuck, you had no clue, don’t lie!”

“Dude, I got you Spiderman socks on your birthday on purpose, I am Lee Donghyuck, I know everything.”

“Sure you do, what else do you know?”

“That the two of you are dating and haven’t told me yet.”

“What the fuck.”