#but some ideas just get overlooked by accident!

[twisted-wonderland-shenanigans]

Twisted Wonderland Kaiju!AU Note:

So in the summary here that discusses the cast and tools and such, it occurred to me that "basic clothing" was a bit too vague and up to interpretation like say a T-shirt and pants or shorts. So to help with visualization and draw more inspiration from the game, the clothing that Yuu was wearing is the same uniform that we see our Overblot boys wearing in chapter 6 (English server peeps, you are in for one HELLUVA rollercoaster ride of chaos when that chapter drops)! The outfit design in question would be more suitable given that duller colors are much harder to spot compared to bright and obnoxious colors that some animals can see very well, so it wouldn't exactly do well to have any humans wandering around the island looking like a tasty snack for some hungry predator or looking like a play thing for some massive kaiju. >.>;

I'll do some more development on the researchers and whatnot, but I wanted to make note of this while the thought was in my head. UvU

Spoilers for English server players under the cut with reference to the outfits from chapter 6 in question, but that's the only spoiler I will give for now! I know some people don't like getting spoilers until the actual thing drops.

This is what I would imagine the outfit Yuu wears in the prologue of the Kaiju!AU. The only difference is that they won't have the collar around their neck as you see with Riddle in the battle scene!

[pickingupmymercedes]

Ways to say "I love you" part 2 - Lewis Hamilton

I think we all deserve a little something after the horror we went through in today's race ❤️

warnings: mentions of blood, accidents and bit of angst

wordcount: +2k

important: again, each drabble was writen as a snippet into different moments with Lewis. Special thank you for my 💗 anon for helping with some of the ideas

As always, my asks are open for corrections, ideas and just to chat too!

Over a cup of tea

“We need to talk this through, before it blows in our faces, Lewis” Serious expression on your face as you handed him the cup of tea on the balcony of your apartment overlooking London.

“Mhmm, we do?” He questioned confused.

“Yes…what exactly are we?” You couldn’t look him in the eye as you questioned him, too embarrassed you weren’t sure if what you felt the night before was real, even if come the morning he was still there, as he had been for the past two months.

“Those words last night meant nothing to you?”

“They meant the world, actually”

“But you don’t feel the same?” The confusion now passed on to him, forehead scrunching as he questioned if he hadn’t read your relationship right, and your body responding before your head could think it through as you reached for the hand he willingly let you take.

“I… I need to feel safe to say it back.” You responded after a few awkward seconds of silence as he waited for your response.      

“I want you, if you’ll have me. I really do love you. And you don’t need to say it back now, just let me know if this relationship is for real, because I want it to be.” He said looking into your eyes, anxiously waiting until you lifted your head to give you a smile.

“Thank you for understanding” You said buried into his neck as you took the tea away from his hands and brought him closer.    

Over a bottle of wine

“Found board games!” You excitedly exclaimed as you walked back into the house. Tiny feet stomping away and reaching you in seconds.

“Is there Monopoly? Uncle Lew said we could be here for daayssss” Willow was the first one to start taking the boxes as you handled her and Kaiden the pile you had just borrowed from the nearest neighbor

“Are they still stuck in New York?” You asked Lewis just as he set his phone down.

“Earliest forecast is tomorrow night, possibly” a concerned look to him as his mom and sisters got stuck in a snow storm on their way from England to Colorado.

“Guess we have these two to ourselves then”  

“Granny said it’d be good practice for you to take care of us” Kaiden chirped in but not fully aware of the shock in Lewis’ face at the remark.

“It’ll be fun when there’s two more girls to play with” This time Willow getting you to choke on the water you were drinking.

“Why two girls?” Lewis amusedly asked, aware you were still trying to hold the laughter in the kitchen

“Dunno” She simply shrugged as she helped her brother set up the game.

“Two girls, huh?! You know people say I’m a girl dad…” He brought back the subject as he picked up the mess left in the living room, a glass of wine open on the kitchen counter and two glasses already in your hands as you approached him after putting the kids to bed.  

“I think I’d be happy with that” Your soft smile easing the tension you felt in him as he mentioned kids with you for the first time, handing him his glass and dragging him to sit down on the sofa for a bit.

“I think I’d prefer a boy then a girl, you know, so he could be there for her.” He said after a bit of silence, almost as if he was pondering what would be best order, and you could feel the yearning to have kids of his own in his voice.  

“I agree with the internet people on that one, you’re too much of a girl dad, babe” You set your drink on the side table, cuddling closer to his chest as he pondered on his glass.

“Doesn’t really matter, honestly, just one would be more than enough. As long as I got you too”

As an apology

“What the hell was THAT for?” You threw your handbag and phone all the way across the kitchen island as you looked at Lewis standing at the door, an annoyed look to him.

“That guy shouldn’t have approached you” His mind still on the tall blue-eyed dude that tried to buy you a drink at the club.

“I can handle myself you know?! Never had the need for a knight in shining armor…” all your anger gone as you realized how absurd that sounded when said to your knighted boyfriend, a smile cracking the tough face you were fighting hard to keep.

“I love you, okay?! You may not need to be saved from a monster but you’re gonna have a knight by your side regardless.”

Taking the cue, he reached for you and brought you close by your waist, tucking one side of your hair behind your ear while using his other one to caress your check.

“Yes sir.” His sweet eyes turning into dark one as he heard you whisper the title and felt your hands rummage through his back. 

As a hello

You smelt his cologne before he walked back into the room from the bathroom, woody and citric tones overcoming your senses as a light tug at your exposed breasts demanded your attention back.

“Hey darling, you done there? Sure you don’t anymore?” The little fingers of your month-old baby girl clutching your fingers as you softly redirected her small mouth back to the spot her eyes wildly looked for.

“Gosh, I love you two so much” His remark a common occurrence in your daily routine in the bubble of nappies, changes and feeds your lives had turned into those past weeks, in the dead of the cold but sunny winter in Monaco.

“Hello to you too, hot stuff” he smiled back as you checked his toned abs adorned by the towel in his waist, sitting by your side in the headboard of your bed, hands caressing your thighs.

“You sure you’re going to be okay here this weekend?” Concern written all over his features as he stroked your daughter’s tiny legs.

“Your mom’s here, my mom’s here, we’re gonna be just fine Lew.” His eyes searching for any doubts in your mind.   

“I’m only a call away, okay?!” He whispered as he kissed your head, enjoying the last moments he would have with his little family for a few days before yet another season began. 

With a shuddering gasp

It’s funny how time really is relative, you thought as you slowly watched four cars pile onto each other in a traffic jam that had just about three other cars in front already. You weren’t even paying attention to the road before, only really looking up from your phone when your car suddenly swerved right and hit the grass on the side of the road.

“Are you okay y/n?” His whole body hovering over yours, hands already unbuckling your seatbelt as Lewis tried to grab your attention.

“C’mom babe, we need to get you out of the car, now” He tried again but you couldn’t respond back, still in shock from the near miss, your hands a wobbly mess as he squeezed it.

“I’m carrying you outside, okay?!” He didn’t even wait for a reply before lifting you like you weighed nothing, examining you in the process to check for anything hurt while he carried you to the rest of people waiting by the road.

It took a while, more than a few minutes for your eyes to start focusing back on your surroundings. He was knelt right in front of you, worry all over as he asked again and again if you were hurt.

“You saved us” You gasped quietly as your eyes finally reached his, his hands cupping your face the second he heard you, your lips already on his as you felt his arms taking you into his body.

In a letter

You’d been, since the beginning, the one he wanted, comings and goings through the years hadn’t been able to diminish the electric pull he felt whenever he saw your smile light up the room, even from afar. But as if the universe liked having a laugh at their expenses, time and time again you’d both find your lives going in complete opposite directions. So, as he sat in his desk writing his vows, he could only be amazed that by some miracle he had found his way into your life and into your heart.

“ … So, I vow to be your lover, companion, partner and ally. Through what may I promise to always be there. I might not have the answers or tools but I’ll walk with you, through the darkest of valleys or at the summit of our dreams.

I love you for you, because you give me the chance to be my truest self, because when you’re around I know we’ll find our way through. I love you, and from the moment I learned that, I’ve been giving it my all to be worthy of you.”

When the broken glass litters the floor

“Fuck, why did I do that?” Your exclamation coming out a bit louder than expected as your eyes started to water from the sharp pain in your hand, blood already dripping from the gush on the palm as you looked to the pieces of the glass on the floor.

“Babe? What’s happened, what was that noise?” His voice coming from just outside the bathroom door, fidgeting with the lock to try and get in.

“Please, let it be a good timing” Was all you could whisper to yourself, the knot in your throat almost suffocating you, the reality of it all too much to comprehend or process, your feet automatically swerving the glass and blood on the floor to get to the door.

“I hope you don’t have anything important going on in the next months” you said just as his eyes tried to scan you and the bathroom. His features with confusion all over as you handled him the stick with the 2 lines on them.

“What’s… but the doctor said…really?” You watched as all types of emotion tumbled across his eyes, overwhelmed an understatement to what you both felt at that moment.

You nodded just slightly after a few moments of his eyes questioning yours, the start of a smile forming on his lips as his arms reached you and engulfed you in a hug, crashing your injured hand in the process.

“Ouch, hand” He froze as you winced, putting two and two together, looking to the blood and the remains of the glass and seeing the injure on your palm for the first time.

“I do hope this kid takes after you and isn’t as clumsy” You pointed as he sat you down at the tub to check the cut. His smile reaching all the way to his eyes as he chuckled and looked at you.

“Nah, I hope this kid is every bit just like you.”

With no space left between us

You could feel his movements as he opened the parachute and brought you two back down to safe land, but nothing managed to tear your eyes from the immensity of the sky. There was infinity as long as your eyes could see and you were nothing in comparison, your thoughts long lost to the smallness of human race.

“You were awfully quiet up there, you good?” His voice a bit dry from the wind, your bodies tightened together as the guys got you both out of the mess of ropes.

“I think I’m still processing how small we really are” You answered almost to yourself, still trying to comprehend what you had just experienced.

“Another go at tandem is due then?” You saw the smirk in his face as you turned to look at him, his arms still very much wrapped around you and his fingers circling in your forearm.

“Thank you for dragging me out here, but how did you know I’d like skydiving?!” You reached back to his arms while they strapped you out of the seat, holding him closer, still with the ghost feeling of the wind around.

“I love you… that’s how I knew you’d love it.” He said to your hair as he held you to him, smug face as he reveled in the feeling of you.  

From very far away

The speakers blasted the victory song as each of the three drivers on the podium sprayed champagne around, everyone drenched and smiles thrown left and right, laughs being heard all the way around the Monza podium.  

As Lewis stood by the edge of the platform, he lifted his trophy at the sea of Tifosi, as a way to show appreciation for the support so far on the season and at his new home race, dedicating his win to them.

Turning to the pitlane he also pointed his trophy to the Ferrari team, scanning the crowd he found you at, just by Fred and Anthony, tears flowing down and a gleaming smile that could light up his entire soul. You tried mouthing something to him but he couldn’t quite make it out in the overwhelming state you were all in.

“I love you” he said to you, from the top of the podium, knowing that whatever it was you were saying, and whatever it was that happened, could be answered and resolved with those three words.

[gurugirl]

A Good Boy | 5. When In Greece

Summary: A family vacation to Greece is meant to be peaceful and relaxing but when Y/n is forced to confront Harry about her feelings everything is turned upside down.

Note: This is stepmon!reader x stepson!harry - both are adults in this story but don't read if you don't like it.

Word Count: 17,236

Warning: 18+ only, NSFW, smut, inappropriate & forbidden relationship, age gap, cheating, lying, angst

A Good Boy Masterlist

Y/n stumbled bleary-eyed to her car as she tried to catch her breath. She felt like she was in a cloud of red, full of stinging bees trudging through a telescoped tunnel of hopelessness. She’d never experienced that particular feeling before but she forced her brain to stop its thoughts and found a safe spot to release her tears and sobs into her leather steering wheel which was at the campus café parking lot just a half mile from Harry’s dorm. Not ideal but she was unable to hold her despair in for another moment when she pulled into an open space and shut the engine off.

When she finally hiccupped through her tears and numbness began to take over she dialed Marla.

“Where are you?” Marla knew the call was coming. And being the best friend anyone could ever ask for, anticipated needing to keep her day free for her friend.

“I’m at the campus café,” Y/n gasped and closed her eyes. A ridiculous woman. From the beginning of the affair to the end. A terrible, vile, and evil person.  There was no redemption for her.

“Stay where you are. I’m coming to get you–“

“No. I’ll come over. I can–“

“No, you cannot. I will not let you drive while you’re crying and upset. We can get your car later. I don’t want you getting into an accident. Stay put. I’m already on my way.”

And for Harry? The moment he slammed the door shut behind her he fell to the floor on his hands and knees and let his salty tears pool under him onto the stupid cheap rug he bought to make his room look more “homey”. He wanted to rip the rug to shreds but he couldn’t manage to stand up and pull himself together, much less begin to shred woven cotton and polyester into bits out of anger.

He couldn’t begin to make sense of his emotions. The sadness and rage. He wouldn’t be getting over her for a long time. He knew it. He was devastated and the worst part was that she really did like him but she was trying to protect them both from further hurt. He would have learned to deal with it. He would have adapted to the rules. He just needed time. Just a little more time. He was still trying to get used to it.

It was hopeless. He knew all along that it couldn’t last. He just didn’t think it would be over so fast. He’d barely gotten over the thrill of having her for it to all suddenly be ripped away.

He didn’t hate her. Not even close. He was mad, yes, but he could never hate her. Everything that led up to her breaking up with him wasn’t her fault.

He blamed his father.

He blamed the arrangement, which he knew was his dad’s idea. He hated that it was Y/n that Leo wound up picking. She deserved love and affection and she needed it.

He swallowed the bile that rose up in his throat. His hangover was not helping matters. His muscles were stiff as he tried to sit back onto his shins. He was shaking from how he’d tensed his body and from the heartbreak and the tears and the grief.

When his phone chimed with a message his heart leaped and he crawled across the floor to snatch up his phone from his table quickly. But then when he saw it wasn’t Y/n, but rather Tyler letting him know he’d forgotten his wallet, he felt a sharp dejected anguish he knew he was going to have to get used to.

.           .           .

Y/n was in charge of selecting their ocean villa. It was a detached, private villa with a pool overlooking Agni Bay. They would be staying in Corfuand near where they could book private charters to islands and to surrounding beaches. She had booked some excursions and day trips for them but mostly they’d be lounging by the pool on the huge outdoor terrace.

She learned a few days prior that Harry was joining them and bringing Tyler. Leo had told her. It stung a bit that Harry hadn’t told her himself. But then again, it made sense. After breaking it off with him she hadn’t heard from him at all. She missed the daily texts and nightly calls. Missed his voice.

Two weeks without hearing from him at all had been difficult but she immersed herself in tennis club, booked extra sessions, found a nice murder mystery book series to read, and kept herself busy with the girls.

Marla was supportive and helpful. Cyndee and Gina still didn’t know anything but Cyndee did bring Harry up on their last Friday outing. Y/n wanted to strangle Cyndee for bringing it up at all because she was barely hanging on that evening as it was. But of course, Cyndee didn’t know better. She wasn’t in on the secret. Y/n wanted so badly to text Harry and just send him a quick I miss you message. But that wouldn’t help anything.

Leo went out of town for a couple of days for a conference upstate and so Y/n did her best to keep busy. Booking the vacation trip was actually fun. Cathartic even. She’d had the villa reserved far in advance but tacking on the little details felt really nice. Though she was nervous about the idea of Harry being there with them. Maybe it would be okay. Maybe it wouldn’t be a problem with him there. Perhaps things could go back to how they had been before everything happened.

She doubted it but hoped. Plus Tyler would be there to distract Harry. She would do her best to enjoy every minute of her vacation.

And as booked and busy as Y/n made herself during the day, the nights were not kind. When she was finally alone in her room in the dark with her thoughts she cried. She’d let her emotions pour out and soak her pillow. She’d cry in the shower and sit under the water for far longer than she should, being that water was such a scarce resource.

The worst part was that Leo had initiated sex the night after she broke up with Harry. It was awful. She told him she wasn’t feeling well so he backed off. But the following night he wanted her in his bed.

So she went to his bed and tried to perform. She tried to focus on the man she was with but it felt like betrayal. It felt bitter and nauseating. She couldn’t stay wet and she couldn’t finish. But of course, Leo did and once that was done she went back to her room and scrubbed her body until her skin was raw and her eyes were red with tears and her sinuses were clogged in that annoying way that you can’t even manage to clear them.

It had never happened to her before. Her feelings for Harry were much deeper than she allowed herself to realize. But on top of her own feelings for him was the worry that he was also hurting the way she was. She didn’t want to hurt him. She didn’t want him to feel this way.

But he did. He felt the same stabbing pain in his chest every time he thought of Y/n. He cried any time he was alone and he composed message after message to her but never sent them. He couldn’t get the lump out of his throat. He couldn’t eat much. He forced himself to have lunch midday with his friends during the week but it was torture pretending he was fine.

Tyler was worried about him. He checked on Harry every evening before quiet time in the dorm.

“Let’s go out this Friday. We’ll invite a bunch of friends. Let loose. No pressure for anything. Just some fun.”

Harry was indifferent. He didn’t care if he went out or stayed in. It was all the same. He was numb anytime he was with people so he knew he wouldn’t enjoy himself and if he stayed in by himself he’d just write a letter to her and cry and also wouldn’t enjoy himself. Nothing mattered.

The only thing that had him moving forward was his anger about the situation. He told his dad he was going to Greece with them, which he immediately regretted but then knew he couldn’t take back because Tyler was going and plans had been made. But part of him looked forward to going and seeing Y/n. Maybe… just maybe she’d change her mind. Maybe she’d want him again if she just saw him. Maybe he could convince her…

And the third week that had gone by since they’d seen each other was another blur for both of them. Harry was just going through the motions. Studying, school, forcing a smile, crying, sleeping… And for Y/n she was barely paying attention to anything that was happening during her busy days, never letting her mind wander too far from her current activity whatever that may have been. But her nights were clear and painful. She allowed herself to think of him and to cry and to feel.

Her girl’s night out was something she usually looked forward to but this time she was dreading it when Marla told her they’d be going to a new place. Leo hadn’t been home all day and Linda finished cleaning the house early and so Y/n was left alone for a big part of the day. It had been a mistake to assume she was going to relax and lay by the pool and read. She couldn’t focus. So instead she let herself think of Harry and wonder about him. The lounge chair she was on was the one that she and Harry had come to after their pool escapade.

Putting her hands on the fabric of the cushion she imagined that day so vividly. Then the girls came over and later that night they’d had sex in his room but Marla had overheard. She winced from the memory.

Everything reminded her of him. So she was feeling more like drinking a bottle of wine and smoking a joint and passing out rather than dancing the night away in a busy bar.

But, just like every other girl’s night out, Marla arrived in the Uber to pull Y/n out of her slump.

She hadn’t even bothered to wear makeup. She did put on a dress but it wasn’t anything that would draw attention. Her flat sandals were more cute than sexy. She hadn’t showered that day.

“Not to be rude, my love, but you do not look like you’re ready for a night out. We’re going to that new spot in Malibu. Remember?”

Y/n nodded, “Yeah. I remember. Maybe I shouldn’t go. I’m okay just to stay home,” she shrugged.

“Absolutely not. You’re coming with us. You need to get out of this big empty mansion and have some fun. Stop thinking about him. Just… come out and enjoy yourself the best you can. It’s better than wallowing here alone.” Marla was right of course.

The club in Malibu was a very popular spot. They’d never been because Malibu was a bit of a hike but they figured a change of scenery could be good (Marla suggested it).

Cyndee had gotten them in at a spot with a VIP table and bottle service. The table was in the middle of all the action. The room was dark with flashing lights and loud music and the ceiling opened up to the night sky. It was actually quite posh.

Lots of young pretty things were dancing and grinding together. The dance floor was packed. Y/n felt out of place. She normally dolled up but tonight, she looked more like an 8th grade math teacher.

“Please smile. You’re making me sad,” Marla whispered into her ear as they took their spot in the circular booth. Cyndee was dancing already and Gina was sitting at the table with a man who she knew from some social club she frequented. He just happened to be there at the club that night.

Gina introduced him, “This is Elias,” he stretched his hand out to shake Marla’s and then Y/n’s.

Elias was attractive and friendly. He was also really funny, which Y/n found refreshing. A good laugh. That’s what she’d needed.

She wasn’t in the mood to dance at all but Marla kept trying to convince her to let loose, “Come on! You’re gonna regret not dancing the night away. I think it’ll do you good!”

“Yeah! Come out and dance! I’ll go up with you too.” Elias smiled down at her and raised a brow.

She shook her head and sighed before slipping out of the booth and ambling to the dance floor.

And both Marla and Elias had been right. It was fun. It made her feel better. She almost forgot about Harry for a solid five-minute stretch.

She hadn’t had much to drink. She knew that the more alcohol she consumed the sadder she’d get and there would be a chance she’d wind up drunk texting Harry. She didn’t want to do anything to mess up any progress of moving on.

Elias was a terrible dancer so he fit right in with the girls. The DJ was playing some interesting music choices, some not so good to dance to but Y/n tried to ignore when the next song came on. In fact, it was so hard to transition from dancing and the beat at the end of the previous song to the next she gave up, “I’m going to grab a drink,” she spoke to Marla.

She needed a breath, despite the fact that the club was packed, getting off the dance floor cleared her mind up a bit.

The setup at the bar was very different from how it was at Murphy’s. It was in the shape of a large circle in the center of the room with neon lights that lit all the colorful bottles underneath.

Leaning her hip to the bar wall she tried to catch the eye of one of the bartenders. People all around were dancing slowly to the beat, couples smushed together enjoying the new pace of the song. The lyrics weren’t clear but Y/n knew it was something that had couples grinding together.

When she finally caught the eye of one of the bartenders she smiled and watched as they made their way toward her. But then suddenly her space was crowded by someone far taller and then she heard his voice, “Having fun?”

She thought she must be dreaming. Must be mistaken. Perhaps she’d had more alcohol than she realized. She rotated herself to look up and saw the light green eyes and soft strawberry lips of the man she’d been missing for nearly three weeks.

“Not really,” she replied honestly.

“What will you have?” The bartender interrupted their moment.

“Just a water for me, please,” Y/n nodded and smiled politely before Harry asked for a tequila. Neat.

Harry kept his eyes on Y/n. He could see she hadn’t worn makeup and hadn’t done anything with her hair at all. It made him feel the tiniest bit better to know she wasn’t trying to look sexy for anyone. Especially since she wasn’t with him.

“Who’s he?” He’d had enough tequila that he didn’t care if he sounded jealous. He was jealous. He didn’t like that she was out and dancing with some guy.

“I just met him tonight. A friend of Gina’s,” she shrugged and took in his appearance. Dark circles and stress lines between his eyes. Unshaven face. She felt like his appearance reflected her own sadness. “How are you doing, Harry?”

He scoffed and peeled his eyes from hers to look across the bar, “Just great.”

She nodded quietly and let her eyes drift off into a corner as she felt the weight of everything on her. The way this wasn’t fair. The way they were both hurt but there was nothing they could do about it.

When the bartender came back with their drinks Harry finally looked back down at her, “So you’re not drinking?” He took a quick sip from his own glass as he kept his eyes pinned to hers.

“I had a couple but I’m not trying to get drunk. It’s not wise probably.”

Harry tilted his head, “And why’s that?”

“Because alcohol kind of exasperates sad emotions. I don’t need to feel any sadder.” She spoke honestly. She didn’t need to tell him that. She could have just kept that to herself but he was being a bit cold with her, a bit standoffish and she didn’t like it. Her hope was that the confession would resonate and he’d lower his walls a bit. She wanted his warmth. Missed it.

He nodded and smirked as he looked over her head and lifted his glass upward gesturing to someone before looking back down at her, “Don’t be sad. You got exactly what you wanted.”

Suddenly he waved over at the bartender to get her attention again and Y/n figured it was best if she left. He was not budging with the attitude and she was beginning to feel her face heat up from frustration and grief, which soon would turn to her nose getting filled and tears breaking from her eyes. So she pushed herself off the bar and began to make her way through the packed floor back to her friends.

But she felt his hand wrap around the back of her arm before she could get too far and she felt the melancholy rise of undeserved hope sneak up her skin and to the back of her neck as she turned, “You did get what you wanted didn’t you? Tell me you got what you wanted.” He spoke into her ear as the song changed to something more up-tempo.

Shaking her head she scanned his face, “No. I didn’t get what I wanted. I got what I deserved.”

“What does that mean?”

“It means I didn’t deserve what I wanted, Harry.” She swallowed as he stared down at her, his face close to hers so he could hear.

“What did you want, Y/n?”

“That’s not fair. We can’t talk about this here.” She looked to her peripheral and back to him.

Harry’s eyes roamed her face as the bartender called out to him to pick up the second drink he ordered. He looked over his shoulder and then turned back to her, “I want to talk to you. Where can I find you?”

Y/n turned and jutted her chin toward the round booth her group was at, “Just there at that booth.”

She floated across the floor in a daze toward the table. She almost couldn’t believe it. What kind of luck was this? Los Angeles was massive. Knowing that Harry was at the same bar as she was, in Malibu of all places, seemed impossible. Highly highly unlikely. She settled into the booth opposite Cyndee and Gina and looked around the bar in search of Harry. She wasn’t sure where he’d gone off to or who he was with so she didn’t know where to look.

But after a few minutes, she saw him cut through the crowd toward her and behind him, not following, a young woman, Y/n recognized as Leslie. He was in the club with Leslie. She wondered if he’d perhaps been seeing her. That would be a good thing in regard to their situation. She didn’t like the idea but it would be good for him.

“That’s Harry!” Cyndee spoke loudly across the table, looking from Y/n to Harry as he neared the table.

Everything appeared to her in slow motion as he smiled and greeted the two ladies and then looked at Y/n as he leaned in to speak close, “Will you come with me? So we can talk?”

The hallway toward the bathrooms had tiny square mirrors all over the ceiling, walls, and floor. The music was still evident from the main room of the club but things were quieter once they’d passed the threshold into the hallway.

Y/n leaned into the cool wall behind her and crossed her arms as she looked up at Harry who stood in front of her, “Who’s the guy?”

“I told you, Harry. A friend of Gina’s. First time meeting him tonight.”

He nodded, “Seemed to be getting pretty friendly with him out there.”

“We were just dancing. Plus Marla was with us. Doesn’t matter anyway. What about Leslie? You’re here with her?”

“Here with a bunch of friends. And I asked Leslie to come. Yeah. Doubt you really care.”

His words were cold and very unlike how she’d been used to him behaving around her. But it was probably better this way. She shrugged, “I just want you to be happy. If you like her that’s good.”

Harry sighed, “So you gonna tell me what it is you wanted that you didn’t deserve?”

“I don’t think it’s a good idea to talk about that. I mean…” she dropped her arms to her sides and bunched the material of her dress nervously, “I think you know. You know how I feel, Harry.”

“See that’s what I’m confused about. The more I think about it the harder it is for me to wrap my mind around it. You said you broke up with me to spare me but I feel like the real reason is because it’s too hard. I think if you really liked me enough you’d have tried harder. You didn’t even give me a chance before you dropped me.”

“No. I saw how much it was affecting you. I can’t stand to hurt you so I needed to do it. Yes, part of it was because it’s hard. The situation was –“

“You hurt me the most by breaking it off,” he put a palm on the wall next to her head as he spoke, “Now I’m just angry. It didn’t make things better. And now what was the fucking point? You said you didn’t even get what you wanted. So why do it? Tell me what you really wanted. I just need to hear you say it, Y/n.”

She blinked her eyes as she looked into Harry’s. She was suddenly glad she hadn’t worn makeup because she was already feeling the beginning of the sting of tears behind her eyes, “You. But you know that.”

His features softened immediately. His berry lips parted as he wet them with his tongue and he brought his other palm up to the wall to narrow the space between them, “If you wanted me, you had me. You have me.”

She shook her head, “I don’t deserve you, though. That’s why this–“

“Fuck off with your bullshit. Like you’re some kind of martyr. You took everything from me. I just wanted to be with you. I wanted to be yours,” he kept his voice low but he spoke with heat and emotion, “I would have learned to be okay with it but you dropped me so fast I didn’t even have time to get used to it,” Harry pushed himself back and ran a hand through his hair.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t know what to do. I still don’t. I have no idea what I’m doing at all. I feel evil. I feel like your feelings are far more important than mine,” she felt the first tear make a warm trail down her cheek and then as she blinked a second and third. “I’m sorry.”

Harry watched as she tried to hold back her emotion but he saw the tears on her face and he felt bad for his outburst but he was still so raw and angry from everything. “Please, don’t…” he softly brushed the back of his hand upward over her cheek to wipe her tears, “don’t cry. You’re gonna make me cry.”

She put her hand over his and closed her eyes, “I don’t want you to cry. You deserve to be happy, Harry.”

He shook his head and reached up to cup the other side of her face with his hand, “You don’t want me to cry? It’s all I’ve been doing. Every night for the past 19 days. I miss you, Y/n.”

She looked up at him, “I miss you too but you know we can’t… you deserve to be with someone you can have a real relationship with.”

Harry stepped in close and rested his forehead against hers, “Don’t want anyone but you.”

The world stopped and the only sound she could hear was her heart pumping in her chest. Having him so close to her was comforting and overwhelming all at the same time. It hurt but it felt good. She was confused. Maybe it had been a mistake to break up with him. Maybe that was the mistake.

“Harry?”

The pair separated quickly when they heard Leslie’s voice. Y/n’s face began to burn with embarrassment. She’d let it go too far. She hadn’t been in her right mind. Harry’s words and his eyes had her spinning and in a daze.

Leslie said something that Y/n couldn’t hear as her ears began to ring and regret blanketed her skin. She should never have allowed it to get that far. To let him touch her and stand so close… she knew better.

She looked between Harry and Leslie when Harry turned to whisper in her ear, “Will you come find me when you leave? I want to see you.”

Leslie’s face told Y/n everything she needed to know. Leslie was curious about what was going on. Suspicious. Leslie clearly liked Harry. And Harry could like Leslie too if it hadn’t been for Y/n.

Looking back at Harry she shook her head, “Harry… this can’t. No. We can’t.”

His hand wrapped around her wrist, “Yes, we can. Please don’t do this. Please, Y/n.”

“Leslie is right there, Harry. Go have fun with your friends. Pretend I’m not here.”

Harry stepped back and let go of her. He shook his head in disappointment, his eyes piercing into hers, “Fine.”

The way Leslie kept her eyes on Y/n until Harry pulled at her arm had Y/n feeling her guilt and shame bloom and swell.

She closed her eyes as Harry led Leslie out of the hallway and back into the main room of the club. It hurt too much to watch. She felt like she was back to day one when she broke up with him. She hoped that he’d begun to move on but he hadn’t. And neither had she.

“So what was that about?” Cyndee asked as Y/n slid back into the booth.

“He just had a question about our family vacation,” Y/n lied. She was glad the club was dark and the lights that illuminated could hide that she’d been crying. It was ridiculous. She was ridiculous.

Harry had effectively ruined her girl’s night out. Of course, it wasn’t totally his fault. He was in the same boat she was. And she tried not to let her eyes rove the features of the people dancing or standing at the periphery to perchance spot him again, but she couldn’t help it. She wanted to see him. Just another peek.

But Harry had moved so that she wouldn’t be able to lay her eyes on him, though he knew where she was and he continued to look toward the booth where she was sitting.

“Why do you keep looking over at your stepmom?” Leslie pulled him down so she could speak into his ear. He’d assured her that what she saw was just them talking and that it was loud so they had to stand that close. He said that Y/n had been upset about something. But Leslie wasn’t quite so sure. She’d seen his forehead pressed to hers. Had seen how he was cradling her face in his palms and how tense the moment was.

“Oh, didn’t realize I was. Just worried about her.”

And that was kind of the truth. He was worried about her. But not for reasons he could explain. Not to Leslie.

More alcohol. Shots, beer, martinis, dancing. A full hour had gone by. Y/n was on the dance floor again and trying to let the alcohol cover up her sadness but even in her state she couldn’t stop thinking about Harry. Especially when she’d finally caught sight of him on the dance floor. Especially when he was dancing with Leslie. Kissing Leslie. Hands on Leslie. Hips pressed to hers.

She swallowed down the jealousy the best she could. It was better to have Harry with someone his age. Someone who wasn’t his stepmom.

Marla danced with Y/n and kept asking if she was okay.

“I’m just trying to not think about it,” Y/n spoke into her friend’s ear as she watched Leslie’s hand sneak up the back of Harry’s shirt.

And it wasn’t that Harry wasn’t enjoying Leslie touching him and grinding against him. He thought Leslie was cute. He liked her. And in another world where he hadn’t gotten involved with Y/n, he’d be over the moon about where the night was leading. He’d already invited Leslie back to his dorm room, to which she enthusiastically said yes.

He was going to forget about Y/n the best he could. Do normal 21-year-old college guy shit and have sex with someone after a night out. He could see himself dating Leslie. Enjoying her company. And maybe he’d get over Y/n after enough time.

But it didn’t help that he couldn’t stop stealing glances at her. She was dancing near the other man. Not in a way that should have Harry feeling jealous but he couldn’t help that part. He was jealous. He didn’t think anyone should be near her. If he couldn’t have her then no one else should either.

“I’m right here, Harry,” Leslie put her arms up over his shoulders to pull his attention back to her. He didn’t know what he was doing. He was really trying to enjoy the girl he was dancing with and ignore the one he was not but it was almost impossible. He’d do almost anything to have the girl in his arms be Y/n rather than Leslie. To have Y/n’s hips glued to his, her eyes on him, her warm skin stuck against his…

When he looked at Y/n again and caught her gaze he caved. Maybe it was all the alcohol, or it was his jealousy, or his heart thinking for him rather than his brain but he put his hands over Leslie’s arms and moved her off of him, “I need to um...” he didn’t finish saying what he needed to do. But he knew it was a need. He had to convince Y/n of what he was already sure of himself.

Harry trudged through the sweaty bodies with his eyes on her and she watched him approach. His eyes were dark and his face set with a menacingly chilly expression.

He stood in front of her and pulled her in by her waist and she gasped, “What are you–“

“Dancing with my stepmom.” Harry began to sway and Y/n grasped onto his sturdy biceps, “Harry we can’t. Someone will see–“

“I don’t fucking care, Y/n,” He leaned in and spoke lowly into her ear, “Just listen. I want you. I don’t care if I’m just the side piece or whatever shit you want to call it. I fucking don’t care. Let it be messy. We’ll be together when my dad’s not around. I can give you what he can’t. Don’t punish yourself because you don’t think you deserve that. You do. We both do.”

She darted her eyes to Marla who was next to Harry before turning her head to respond to her stepson, “It doesn’t matter what we want. We can’t have that, Harry.”

His grip on her waist tightened, “We can and you know it. Unless you tell me you don’t want me. Tell me right now that you hated being with me and that you don’t miss me and I’ll leave you alone. Tell me all those things you told me about how you felt were just lies and I’ll never bother you again.”

She couldn’t help the way her body trembled as he spoke and the breath she let out bloomed over his neck. He knew she couldn’t deny it. He knew she wouldn’t take back what she said. And that was enough for him to feel like it wasn’t over.

“Harry…” she breathed his name as his thumbs dug into the material of her dress at her waist.

Suddenly it felt as if there was no one in the club except for them. She could feel his cheek against her temple, the whiskery bits scratching her skin. Their bodies moved together slowly as the next song came on.

When she felt his mouth move as he spoke she had been unable to stop the way her chest rose and fell deeply, pants leaving her mouth.

“You can’t because you need me just as much as I need you, Y/n. Fuck everyone else. I don’t care. Fuck my dad. Come home with me.”

And despite the pair forgetting about everyone around them, all their friends watched on as Y/n and Harry danced close, Harry's lips moving next to her ear, Y/n’s breaths deepening, her hands on his arms, his on her waist.

“Y/n,” Marla tapped her arm, and the sudden shock of being brought out of Harry’s spell was clear on her face when she looked from Harry to Marla. “We should get going. Okay?”

And that was it. He’d lost her again. She shook her head at Harry as she slipped out of his arms and pulled herself away from him and out of the club.

.           .           .

She had been thankful that Marla had come when she did. She was just about to give in. Just about to let the alcohol and Harry’s convincing words do all the thinking for her. She wanted to go with him. Wanted to just forget about it all. She wanted him. She could admit that. And part of her did need him. That was what was so hard. Because, yes, the sex was fun and she really loved it with Harry. But it had gone beyond sex. Their connection was deeper than just sex.

Waking up the next morning in her bed with Marla asleep next to her she felt crushed. Felt suffocated. She didn’t know how she was going to handle going on a vacation with him. Seeing him every day. She didn’t know if she was strong enough to stay away from him. Strong enough to keep denying herself or him.

She was in too deep and she knew that. She knew her feelings weren’t just physical. She knew it wasn’t just a phase. She knew that, to her, Harry was more than just a man she’d gotten involved with that she had begun to have some kind of attachment to.

It was more than that. And she knew it. But she just wasn’t ready to admit it to herself yet. Not aloud. Nor in her mind would she connect her thoughts and her feelings and recognize that one unmistakable emotion.

When they got back to Y/n’s house after that disaster of a girl’s night, Marla had given her a stern talking to. The truth. The reality.

“That was dumb, Y/n. Everyone watched you and Harry practically make out on the dance floor.”

“We didn’t kiss, Marla.”

“I know, but that was… very intimate. You might as well have had his tongue down your throat. He was talking with his lips on your ear and holding your body against his. It was obvious that it wasn’t just a friendly chat. And that girl he was with? Well, she saw it too and you should have seen the look on her face. Poor thing.”

Y/n knew that was what she deserved to hear. It was the truth and she had a moment of weakness. But Harry made her weak.

“I know. I’m just having a hard time not… I’m fucking so confused. I hate this.”

“You’ll feel better in the morning. Want me to stay the night? I’ll keep your phone away so you’re not drunk dialing him or something.”

And so that’s what happened. Marla was trying to help. She was a good friend. Y/n was thankful. But she also hated that she wasn’t waking up in Harry’s bed. Hated that she didn’t give in and that they couldn’t just be together. She wasn’t sure she’d ever get over him.

Harry’s stunt with Y/n had been the nail in the coffin with Leslie. She was planning on going back to his place. But after seeing the way he was behaving with Y/n, twice in one night was all she needed to see to know that there was something going on.

So he woke up in his bed alone thinking about Y/n. Thinking about how she didn’t deny the way she felt. But she still left him standing there like an idiot. He’d gone out on a limb and fucked up the sure thing he had with Leslie that night and wound up not getting any at all. His hope had soared and then crashed once again as he saw her look over her shoulder before stepping deeper into the crowd of people and out of sight.

.           .           .

The private villa Y/n selected was five bedrooms. Looking online at the photos of the property she hummed to herself as she imagined being dragged into Harry’s room and fucked against the door. He’d be angry with her for making them wait so long. He’d growl into her ear quietly about how she was his and how she needed him as he held his palm over her mouth to keep her quiet.

She swallowed and tried to push those dirty thoughts away. Leo was in his office as she was in her room imagining doing filthy things to his son. She couldn’t help it. Even though they hadn’t spoken since that night at the club she knew that they’d be seeing one another again soon. And that the private villa was spacious and there would be plenty of opportunity for them to have privacy.

For better or worse she couldn’t stop thinking about it and hoping they’d get the chance. She knew she shouldn’t think that way. But it was hard to stop those thoughts from taking over. Because she knew how he felt about her. She figured he’d try and convince her again and if it was just the two of them in a room with the door locked she wouldn’t say no. She wouldn’t be able to.

.           .           .

The airline lounge was quiet. There weren’t that many people to be seen at 5 am. Y/n sipped a latte and tried to distract herself by looking at her phone but she knew that Harry would show up soon with Tyler. She’d been unable to get much sleep the night before. Which was a shame because the flight with a layover was nearly a full day of travel.

They had a layover in Dublin and from there they’d fly into Corfu where they had ground transportation waiting to take them to their private villa on the ocean. She couldn’t wait to get to their destination.

“Harry texted. They just got through security,” Leo spoke suddenly.

Y/n nodded and looked back down at her phone, trying to act less affected than she was.

When Tyler and Harry arrived at the lounge they sat in a different area closer to the breakfast bar. Harry wore a baseball cap that covered his brown curls and he had his eyes closed until it was time to board their flight.

Y/n was glad that Harry and Tyler were not sitting near her and Leo on either flight. Traveling for nearly an entire day was already stressful enough. She didn’t need the extra tension of seeing Harry the entire time. She’d be getting enough of that in Greece.

.           .           .

The villa was even more gorgeous in person. The terrace was massive with lovely little lights attached to the outdoor canopies and was set on a hill that overlooked the ocean bay. The pool was huge and the property was totally private, surrounded by olive trees and plenty of land for them to explore if they chose. The interior of the villa was rustic but chic. The stone walls and floors with arched doorways and high ceilings with wooden beams were stunning. Every bedroom in the place had a view of the bay. It was literally quite breathtaking.

Leo and Y/n’s room was massive with a large window and terrace and hammocks swaying in the wind. Plants gave them some privacy but Y/n shuddered when she thought about that. She didn’t know how this vacation would go down. If Leo would want sex. He probably would. He was already relaxed and in quite high spirits she could tell.

Y/n was already in a cute bikini by the time Harry and Tyler had come outside to enjoy the terrace and pool and the view. She had her eyes closed, lying flat on her back on one of the lounge chairs.

But Harry wasn’t going to give her anything. He was going to act like he couldn’t care less about her presence or her body or what they’d gone through. If she could act so nonchalant about it so could he.

When Y/n heard the guys jump into the pool she sat up and glanced at Harry’s strong chest before turning her gaze away to watch the gorgeous view of the sea. It was difficult, though, to not let her eyes drag over his pecs and to his tattoos. His arms and his shoulders.

He looked happy. He was laughing with Tyler and seemed relaxed. And that was a good thing. Yes, it was better that he was happy rather than upset about the way things had ended.

Leo jumped into the pool with Harry and Tyler suddenly, the three of them laughing and enjoying the first official day of their vacation.

And Harry could tell that ignoring her was already working. He didn’t look at her but he could feel her eyes on him. He could tell she was trying not to look but failing.

“Thinking about going out tomorrow night. There’s a really nice bar in town. You’d be okay with that if just me and Tyler went?” Harry spoke to Leo but loud enough for Y/n to hear.

Y/n looked down into her lap and tried not to frown. Tried not to let her emotions take over her face. She didn’t know if this was payback or if Harry was actually trying to just move on. Or… perhaps it was just a ploy to make her needy of his usual attention.

“Of course! The driver can take you wherever you need to go and bring you back too. I expected that you and Tyler would want to go out and meet some girls or something.” Leo laughed.

Y/n pouted before blinking her eyes shut and trying to ignore the conversation. She didn’t want to even think about Harry meeting anyone. But what a selfish thing to consider. Her fantasies of Harry begging her to be with him or dragging her to his room slowly began to fade with the reality of the situation. She needed to let it go.

Bedtime came early. Everyone was exhausted from the long trip. Harry had still barely spared her a glance, though he did politely offer her the bottle of wine to refill her glass. But that was it. It was quite the blow to her ego. She figured that was what she deserved, though.

Tyler knocked at Harry’s cracked open door before stepping into his room, “You doing all that on purpose?” He gestured toward the door behind him.

“What do you mean?” Harry’s smirk gave away that he knew just what Tyler was talking about.

His friend cocked his head at Harry and rolled his eyes as he walked deeper into the room and sat on the edge of Harry’s bed, “What do you think I mean?”

Harry shrugged, “Just want to have some fun while I’m here on vacation. Trying not to think about Y/n or anything.”

“Dude you’re so full of shit. You had the chance to do that when we went out to the club but instead, you scared Leslie off for good trying to get with your stepmom in front of everyone.”

Harry shook his head, “Today’s a new day. She doesn’t want me so I’m just gonna have some fun.”

.           .           .

Y/n woke up before anyone else and made coffee. The place was beautiful. She couldn’t get over how bright and paradisiac the place was.

But even with how lovely the villa was… she tried not to pay much mind to the little voice in her head that told her Harry was doing it on purpose. That he was trying to make her jealous. Make her miss him. Make her eat her words about him finding someone his age to be with.

She’d gotten lucky that Leo was so tired the night before. He did kiss her goodnight, though. She rarely got that from him. But she knew he’d want something. He was in way too good of a mood the night before. She could tell he was going to want a roll in the sack soon.

She thought that with Harry and Tyler out that evening it would be a good time. It would be much easier to go along with it if Harry wasn’t nearby. She could pretend to be into it. Maybe he’d go down on her and she could pretend–“

“Up so early.” His raspy, deep morning voice was maybe her favorite sound. Ever. Her cheeks immediately warmed up at his voice coming from behind her, cutting her off from her thoughts.

She turned and watched as he walked around the large stone table to pour himself a cup of coffee.

“Yeah. I got to sleep right away and slept hard. Woke up and felt like I’d had enough rest.” She sipped her coffee as she watched Harry turn around with a mug, take three long-legged strides toward the table and sit down right next to her.

Without looking away from her he took a drink from his cup and Y/n continued to speak to fill in the awkward silence, “So, anyway. And you’re up early. Did you get enough rest?”

Harry smiled thoughtfully as he placed his mug down, “Sure. Slept pretty well. Fell asleep pretty quickly.”

He didn’t miss it when she mentioned that she got to sleep right away. To him, that meant that nothing happened between her and his dad the night before. Which of course he felt relieved by. He tried not to wonder when the last time they slept together was.

Y/n nodded, “Good. I think it’s so peaceful here too. Maybe that’s why we slept so well.” Her smile was genuine and her eyes told Harry she was taking all of him in. Soaking up his presence. Want. Longing.

Good.

“Well, I mean I’ve slept better before. Can think of a couple of times in particular. Ya know?” Harry raised his brows knowingly and licked his lips.

She softly nodded her head and the smallest smile broke out on her lips, “Yeah.” Memories of just how well they could sleep after the kind of intense sex they always seemed to have filled her thoughts.

Neither of them budged from their spot as they kept their eyes agaze on the other.

It was quiet and soft. She could stare into his eyes all day if she were allowed. She wanted to reach across the space to him and pull his shirt collar to bring him down for a kiss but she wouldn’t He wished she would.

Their moment was interrupted when they heard footsteps, quickly both taking their mugs in hand and sipping the hot liquid.

“Morning, early risers,” Leo yawned and stretched his arms overhead.

Tyler didn’t wake up until nearly noon. Y/n stayed most of the morning in a hammock by the pool reading while Harry sauntered around in only athletic shorts, baring his chest and abs. She was glad to have a book to read to distract her from the expanse of his skin littered with inky sketchings. The last thing she needed was to have Leo see her ogling his son.

After Harry and Tyler had left the big villa felt odd. It wasn’t that she hadn’t been used to being in such a large dwelling. Leonardo’s home was nearly as big. It was that the sudden weight of what she knew was coming felt paralyzing. She wasn’t going to be able to get out of this one she knew. Sure she could just say she didn’t want to have sex but that’s what she’d been doing far too frequently lately.

And just like she knew would happen, Leo was pulling her into his chest and trying to talk dirty to her. Two months ago it would have been welcomed.

“They’re gone for the night. What do you say we have a little fun?”

Y/n plastered a fake smile on her lips and drew her hands up over his shoulders, “What did you have in mind?”

“Haven’t felt you in a while. Missed you.” Leo pushed his mouth over hers and she closed her eyes and tried to shift her thoughts from the moment. Tried imagining she was doing anything else. Playing tennis with her trainer Margaret, swimming in the pool, shopping for new shoes…

But by the time they’d gotten into their bed, it was getting difficult to imagine that anything else was happening. So she switched tactics. It was Harry kissing her neck and pulling her clothes down and exposing her breaths. It was Harry whispering to her how pretty she was and what he wanted to do to her.

When he’d slid her panties off and he was bare between her legs she pushed herself up by her elbows and looked at his cock and gulped hard, but not out of lust or want. This wasn’t Harry and it was obvious. It was hard to trick herself that she was kissing Harry and touching his naked body when it wasn’t him. She didn’t want Leo. Not anymore. Not at all.

She blinked her eyes at him and grinned as she placed her palm over his dick before he could put on a condom, “Let me suck you off. Haven’t done that in a long time. And then you can come on my tits or something.” She figured a blow job didn’t feel as dirty as sex. Though choking on a cock was not fun when she wasn’t into it, it felt better than having sex with him, though.

And it wasn’t fun. Leo was well endowed and she had to work for him to come. He kept trying to pull her off so he could fuck her but she insisted that she wanted to get him off with her mouth.

She half regretted the route she’d taken. It probably would have been much faster if she’d just let him fuck her. He would have nutted in under ten minutes and she could fake an orgasm easily and that would be that. But instead, it took nearly double that for him to begin shaking with his release bursting down her throat before she pulled off of him and stroked him over her tits and tummy.

It was also no surprise to her that he didn’t even try to offer her anything once he was done. Which she was thankful for. This was one of those times she was relieved that he was a selfish lover.

.           .           .

Y/n startled awake when she heard Harry and Tyler stumble toward their rooms, with attempts to keep their voices down but failing quite miserably. It was just after 1 am. But when she heard the giggle of a female voice she sat up and strained her ears to listen closer.

Had they brought girls back with them?

She heard stomping and laughing then shushing before one door closed and then seconds later another. She considered going to stand outside of Harry’s door and pressing her ear to the wood to listen. But that was insane. He deserved privacy if he did bring a girl back. And that would be a good thing if he had (this seemed to be her mantra lately). A good thing for him to have some fun. With someone that wasn’t Y/n. That’s what she told herself anyway. In reality, it made her want to vomit.

She laid her head back onto the pillow and sighed. She closed her eyes and tried to let her mind think of anything but what might be happening in Harry’s room. She didn’t want to think about him joking around with another girl in that flirty confident way he does, taking her dress off, kissing the exposed parts of her skin as he lowered the fabric down over her hips. She couldn’t let herself imagine him with his soft raspberry lips doing things to some other girl that he’d done to her. And certainly, she refused to picture him having sex and coming on her tummy when they realized they forgot the condom because they were too caught up and horny.

She hated it. Hated the idea of any of that. Hated being jealous. Hated that she wasn’t being snuck into his room to do all of those things with him.

But the silence was a gift. She could hear nothing from their room and so she eventually convinced herself that she’d only imagined hearing a female’s voice, that there hadn’t been girls with them. And that thought was the only thing that helped her ease back into sleep.

.           .           .

When she finally woke up the following morning she had a feeling of dread and sadness in her tummy. Leo was already up as his side of the bed was empty.

She didn’t want to get up and walk into the kitchen and find two pretty girls sitting with coffee while Tyler sat next to one and Harry the other. Then it would be real. Because she had convinced herself that she’d only imagined hearing things the night before. But she knew what she heard. The distinct voice of a female, maybe two. She hoped she was wrong.

Freshening up her sleepy appearance first she put her messy hair into a ponytail and splashed her face with water. Her pajamas were cute. Little silky shorts and a tank top. It was her regular sleepwear. She had no idea what she was about to encounter but at least if she was going to see the young woman that got a taste of Harry the night before she could look somewhat cute.

But then she heard Leo’s voice. The window in the bathroom faced the balcony of their bedroom. She hadn’t seen him out on the balcony when she went into the bathroom so he must have been standing at the far corner away from where he could be spotted.

“I miss you, honey. I know…” his voice was quiet and soft. He never spoke to Y/n that way. He seemed so gentle with her. Sounded so malleable. So tender.

He chuckled breathily and spoke, “12 more days, Parker. Wish it was you here with me…”

She looked at herself in the mirror and shook her head. What had she gotten herself into? The man she was married to was clearly in love or falling in love with another woman. Y/n wasn’t upset that Leo was finding love with someone else. Y/n didn’t love Leo. But everything felt so fleeting suddenly. So finite. Things weren’t always as they seemed and now she was hyper-aware that the kind of agreement she had might be coming to an end.

She took a deep breath as she walked out of the bathroom, not needing to hear anything else from Leo to understand what was happening, and braced herself for what she might encounter in the kitchen.

But what she found when she got there was not quite what she’d imagined. There was indeed a young woman. Harry was seated at the table with his head drooped down and a mug of coffee in his hands while on the opposite side was Tyler sitting next to a sleepy girl. It was clear that the girl was with Tyler. Though, that didn’t mean there wasn’t another girl somewhere. Perhaps even still lying in Harry’s bed.

Harry appeared to be painfully hungover.

“Morning,” Y/n spoke as she eyed Tyler and the girl.

Everyone’s eyes were suddenly on Y/n.

Tyler cleared his throat, “This is Alex. We’re just waiting on the car to get here so she can go home.”

“So soon? You can stay for breakfast if you like,” Y/n smiled at the girl as she poured coffee for herself.

“Oh that is so kind of you but I have to be at work soon.”

Y/n glanced at Harry who couldn’t even force a smile onto his face. She wanted to ask if there was another girl in the house somewhere but based on Harry’s appearance she thought she knew the answer to that question.

Once Alex left Y/n tasked herself with making a big breakfast for everyone. Cooking made her happy and she figured if the guys were both hungover they’d want something to eat to soak up all the alcohol from the previous night. And also just the knowledge that Harry hadn’t brought a girl home, made everything in her own tummy settle and she was feeling quite peckish as well.

Y/n learned that Harry had gotten on a table and danced the macarena after housing some girl's martini. The girl was apparently into Harry but then he’d gotten quite trashed and that’s when Tyler suggested they head home. With Alex in tow of course.

“Shut up, dude,” Harry grumbled his words.

“Totally blew your shot with her man! And the funniest part of it was that she was so pissed that you drank her drink in one go. Like you just yanked it from her hand, gulped the whole thing down, and then climbed on the table and–“

Harry punched Tyler’s shoulder, “Shut. Up.”

After breakfast, Harry lay by the pool fully clothed. In fact, Y/n was quite sure he was wearing the same clothes as he had been the night before.

Y/n hated that this news made her happy. Hated that she felt smug that he’d gotten too drunk to bring a girl home. Hated that that idea improved her mood at all. But it did.

She was cleaning up the dishes and putting the leftovers away when Leo walked into the kitchen and clapped his hands together, “Today is a beach day. The boys can nurse their hangovers by the sea.”

Most of the morning had been wasted at the villa with Harry trying to recover and get his shit together before they could finally head to the bay.

The water was deep blue and the sky above was bright and clear. The beach had chairs with sun umbrellas all along the shore. They found a few chairs together and draped towels over them.

Harry seemed to be feeling better. Especially when two girls came up to greet him. It was clear they both were interested in Harry. Tyler was an attractive guy too, but Harry was… well he was Harry.  

The girls were from Italy and spoke English perfectly. They were pretty with pretty hair, pretty skin, pretty lips, and pretty accents.

Watching Harry flirt sucked. She didn’t know any other way to feel about it. She tried to pretend she didn’t notice. But it was impossible being that they were only a few chairs away. She could hear everything too. The girls were giggling and Harry was being cheeky and cute, trying to say something to them in Italian and they ate it up, correcting his words and making him repeat but it seemed to only endear them to him even more.

Harry wore a pair of short green swim trunks that did little to hide his tight ass and strong thighs. Tattoos on full show, lean and well-muscled torso flaunted. Harry knew he was attractive. It shouldn’t have come as a surprise that the girls introduced themselves to Harry and Tyler.

Y/n let her sun hat slip over her eyes as she laid back and tried to focus on the sound of the waves in the ocean and not the flirtatious laughter coming from Harry’s direction.

“Will you rub sunscreen on my back, Y/n? Feel like I didn’t get enough toward the shoulders,” Leo put his hand on Y/n’s arm to get her attention.

She scooted in behind Leo on his beach chair to reapply sunscreen to his back but with the angle she was at she had a better view of the boys.

Harry was draped casually on his chair. His smile drew deep dimples into his cheeks and the tiger tattoo on his thigh was being traced by the girl sitting next to him on his chair. They were no longer laughing but speaking quietly to one another.

She watched as the young woman pointed to his butterfly tattoo and Harry took her hand and urged her to put the pad of her finger along the lines of the ink.

Harry could tell Y/n was watching. He did feel a little bad. Just a little, though. Because he wasn’t interested in the pretty Italian girl with her hands on his skin, which was a bit rude of him. And he was reveling in the fact that Y/n might be getting jealous. Also rude of him.  

But when he did finally allow his sight to take his stepmom in he noticed that his dad was rubbing lotion on her back and shoulders. He watched fingers graze along the side of her boobs and noted how his dad was grinning and whispering into Y/n’s ear.

Y/n was holding her hair to the side so it didn’t get sunscreen all over it and her other arm was out in front, palm flat on the chair between her legs so she was slightly bent at the waist. Her cleavage nearly spilled out of her yellow bikini top.

He didn’t like the way Leo was touching her or how Y/n was grinning at whatever was being said.

Harry took the girl's wrist and pulled her hand higher, now pressing her palm over the sparrow on his right pec.

“You work out a lot,” the girl spoke as she looked at Harry with her big brown eyes. She wanted more he could tell.

Harry turned his attention back to the girl fully and shook his head, “Just a few times a week. You obviously work out too.”

Y/n could pull the girl’s hair out. Her hands were on his pecs, feeling the firm muscle that Y/n enjoyed kissing and touching herself. But the worst was the way Harry was looking at the girl. His eyes dragged down her body as he spoke quietly to her. And when he pinched her thigh and she laughed loudly, hopping up from the chair, Harry followed after her and they ran playfully toward the water.

“Want a drink? I was thinking about bringing back some wine or something. There’s a shop just over there.” Leo spoke as Y/n stood up and moved back into her own chair.

“Yeah. Maybe some wine would be good.”

.           .           .

Leo had had a bit too much to drink. And Y/n hated, hated to think it, but it meant he’d pass out and would be unlikely to try anything with her. She could avoid sex with him. At least that evening.

It also meant, much to her devious delight, that Harry and Tyler had to bid adieu to the lovely young ladies, but not before getting some contact information so they could meet up later. Y/n needed their help to get Leo back to the villa in one piece.

Tyler was already setting up plans for that night to see Gia by the time they helped Leo to bed.

“Dude they’re both gonna be there tonight. Gia and Bambi.”

Yeah. The girl that Harry had been flirting with was named Bambi. Of course, that was her name. She was adorable with long legs and big brown eyes. She could pass for a Bambi.  

“I don’t know, man. We just went out last night. I got so wasted and sick. Not sure I’m into it.”

“Really? Bambi was all over you. She wants to see you. You don’t have to drink, H. You know that right?” Tyler laughed.

Y/n was not purposely listening. She just happened to be in the kitchen wiping the countertops as the guys were in the sunroom connected to the kitchen. The fact that she could hear was totally a coincidence. Totally.

“Nah. You go. It’s fine.”

There was a pause for a beat and Y/n strained to hear if they were speaking. Whispering perhaps?

When Tyler responded his voice was much quieter so Y/n wiped her way toward the stone island in the center and perked her ears.

“It’s because of Y/n. Isn’t it? I know you’re still hung up on her but you gotta move on.”

“Tyler, I just don’t feel like going.”

“You’re not gonna be mad if I do then?”

Smiling to herself she moved away from the island and tossed the rag into the sink. Harry wasn’t going out to meet up with Bambi. She shouldn’t have been pleased with that but she was.

Tyler left after the sun had already gone down. Y/n hadn’t heard a single peep from Leo when she settled onto the terrace with a book and the yellow bikini she’d been wearing at the beach. Even at night, the weather in Corfu was warm.

Harry had been in the kitchen for a bit on his phone and then he disappeared for a while. She wished that things could be easy between them. Go back to how they were before.

But when he strutted out to the terrace and walked in front of her before splashing into the pool she was a little surprised that he’d come out with her at all. She thought perhaps he’d keep his distance. But of course, she knew better. She knew he wouldn’t.

And like they had been doing, mostly effectively since arriving in Greece, they ignored one another. Harry swam laps and Y/n read her mystery book and the stars twinkled down on their little paradise by the beach.

Y/n connected her cellphone to the speaker and put on music she had in her saved favorites. A random mix really.

Harry watched her walk across the stones to the outdoor mini fridge and pull out a bottle of beer before turning to Harry with a brow raised, “Want a beer?”

He nodded as he pulled himself out of the water and began to walk toward her. Droplets trickled down his skin and dripped from his trunks that were hung low on his hips.

She did well not to stare at his wet body as she handed him the cold bottle.

“Surprised you didn’t go out with Tyler. Seemed like you would have enjoyed seeing that girl tonight.” Y/n spoke as she sat down on the chair next to her book.

She immediately regretted asking. It made her look desperate, jealous. But perhaps she was.

Harry took the lounge next to hers and put his feet up as he took a swig from the bottle.

“Yeah. I would have enjoyed seeing her. She was really nice.”

“So why didn’t you? This is your vacation, Harry. You should enjoy it.”

Harry leaned his head back into the chair and turned to look at Y/n, “I am enjoying it. Maybe another night I’ll go out. Last night was too much for me.”

They sat silently for a bit as Y/n picked her book back up and tried to concentrate on the words on the page but her mind was racing.

When the next song came on, it had changed the mood entirely. A slow song and the lyrics were maybe somewhat ironic given their circumstance.

Harry stood from his chair and stretched his arms overhead before taking down the last of his beer.

“You done with yours?” He gestured toward her bottle.

“Oh. Yeah. Thanks, Harry.” She was about to pick up the bottle to hand to him but he reached across her and picked it up. Their faces coming within just inches. He’d done it on purpose. But she didn’t say anything as he straightened himself and took the bottles to the trash.

She looked back down at her book but the lyrics of the song and Harry’s fit body were far more interesting to her.

“You’re staring,” Harry spoke with a smile.

Y/n scoffed and rolled her eyes, “No. No, I’m not.” But she didn’t remove her eyes from his frame as she grinned.

Harry kept his gaze set on hers as he adjusted his swim trunks, plucking at the fabric near his crotch where the lining was irritating his skin. He’d done that on purpose too. A reminder to her of what she was missing out on.

She tried not to imagine him without the shorts. She knew what he looked like underneath.

Blinking her eyes she looked down at her lap and took a breath.

“So, Tyler’s having fun. He brought that girl back yesterday and now he’s out with another tonight. Quite the ladies' man,” Y/n tried changing the subject or at least the trajectory of where her mind was beginning to wander.

“Yeah, I guess so,” Harry shrugged as he plopped back down onto the chair and stretched his arms behind his head. “Kind of funny…” Harry chuckled, not finishing his thought.

Y/n turned to look at him, “What’s funny?”

Harry’s bright eyes binged on her exposed skin, “Cause I should be out with him. Bambi was cute. Coulda had fun. Yet here I am.”

Nodding she turned to face him, putting her feet onto the stone below the chair, “You should have gone. It would have been good. You can still go you know.” “Would it be? Is that what you want?” Harry mimicked her stance, turning himself and putting his feet onto the stone, their knees facing one another.

“What I want? What do you mean?”

Harry’s pink lips opened and then closed as he considered his words, “Want me to go out and have fun with someone else? Someone who’s not you?”

Y/n shook her head and looked away from his deep gaze. Of course, she didn’t want that. What she wanted wasn’t fair. Wasn’t right.

She stood up so she could pace. To put some distance between her and Harry because even though he was a couple of feet from her it was too close. But she didn’t get far when she felt his hand on her hip and he was standing over her, “That’s what you want?”

It wasn’t fair. Her feelings weren’t fair. The way he felt for her wasn’t fair. Nothing about their situation was fair.

She looked up at him and the slow riff of the new song made their proximity feel even more intense. It just wasn’t fair.

“Stop, Harry. You already know the answer.”

When his other hand landed on her hip and pulled her in so she couldn’t back away from him he nodded his head, “I do know the answer. That’s why I’m here. With you. Because we want the same thing. Don’t we?”

She dropped her eyes toward his chest, just about where his heart would be. The heart she longed to keep for herself. The most tender heart she’d ever known.

She nodded her answer but did not look up at him. Because it wasn’t fair. Her answer wasn’t fair. His feelings weren’t fair.

“See? You’re just torturing yourself, Y/n. Torturing me. I need you in a way I’ve never needed anything, and I know it’s the same for you. Please look at me.”

Harry didn’t know he could be so relentless about something. He was generally very easygoing and didn’t bother to push anyone in the way he did with Y/n. But it was different. Because he knew they had something special. Something rare.

Slowly she gave in and looked up at him again, bringing her hands up to his chest, palms flat. He looked down at her hands and then back up to her eyes, “Can you feel my heart?”

She nodded as Harry took one of his hands and pressed it over the back of hers to hold her palm in place. The unmistakable frenzied thudding of his muscular organ below vibrated against her skin, “It doesn’t do that with anyone else. Not like this.”

She didn’t want to cry. Didn’t want to let her feelings overwhelm her like they had been since she broke it off. Wanted to keep strong. Didn’t want to give in. Didn’t want to not give in.

“I know you feel the same way. Why are you doing this?”

She let out a shaky breath and blinked her eyes, “Because we can’t.”

“Y/n… I’m…” he shook his head and took a deep breath, “I need you to be honest. Because I can’t keep doing this to myself. I’m going crazy. Tell me you don’t want me.”

“That’s not fair.” Her words were a whisper.

“If you can’t tell me you don’t want me I’m never gonna be able to move on from you, Y/n.”

Harry brought his hands up to her face, not allowing her the chance to look away from him.

“I can’t.”

“Y/n… there’s not a single part of me that doesn’t want every single part of you. It’s only going to get worse. Tell me now you don’t want me. Before I kiss you.” His nose was pressed into her cheekbone as he closed his eyes. He could tell her breath was deepening. Her fingers softly stroked the skin and hair of his chest.

“Harry… please… don’t…” she couldn’t ever tell him she didn’t want him. She should tell him so that they could put an end to all of it. Tell him she never wanted him. Tell him it never meant anything to her. But how could she when that was the furthest thing from the truth? Her heart couldn’t let her speak those things aloud to him. Couldn’t utter those lies.

“Say it and I’ll stop. Say it, Y/n. Put me out of misery. Let me move on if you don’t want me. Say it and I’ll leave you alone for good.”

“It’s not that simple.”

Harry’s lips found the edge of Y/n’s mouth and his muttered words sent a shock through her soul, “Y/n, I love you.”

She gasped and pushed at him, her eyes wide as she shook her head, “No you don’t. Don’t say that!”

Pulling herself from his hold she turned and quickly walked back inside to get away. She needed to break down and cry and scream into a pillow and stomp her feet… anything to stop her veins from overflowing with him. Anything from stopping herself from responding to him in kind.

“Y/n!” Harry walked after her and followed her into the stairwell as she ascended as quickly as her legs would carry her. But Harry’s legs were longer and he was not letting her get away.

“Don’t run away from me, please!”

She pushed her way into a spare room and tried shoving the door closed but Harry’s strong body blocked the door as he forced his way in and closed it behind himself. The dark room was illuminated by the moon and the twinkle lights strung up over the terrace.

“Harry stop. You don’t mean it. You’re… you’re confused… it’s–“

His hands found her waist in the dark and he pulled her into his arms. He pressed his face into her hair, lips close to her ear, “I’m not confused. I’m in love with you.”

She had given in to her tears already. It was too much. Having his arms around her and his skin against hers, his voice, his words. I love you.

She melted into his arms and pressed her wet cheek against his chest as she cried.

Harry was gentle. His hands caressed her back as he allowed her to cry in his arms. He knew he was being bold by telling her how he really felt but he needed her to know. He wanted her to admit her feelings to him. She couldn’t say she didn’t want him because she did want him and he was sure she felt the exact same way for him that he did for her.

“Please, Y/n. If you can’t tell me you don’t want me I’m never gonna stop. I don’t care about the consequences. I don’t care if we get caught or if we keep it a secret forever. I just… I love you. I need you.”

Harry’s shorts were mostly dry by that point. Y/n felt the fabric against her hips as he tightened around her the slightest, his warm breath over her ear, “I love you.”

What was she supposed to do? How was she supposed to just push him away and ignore it all? It was already impossible, but now with his confession, she couldn’t do anything but let her heart crack open wide and allow him in. His warmth and kind heart smothered her resolve. Drowned it until it was gone.

“Goddamnit, Harry.” She spoke with her mouth smashed over his skin.

He put his hands on her face and turned her head up to look at him in the shadowy room, “I’m gonna kiss you. Tell me right now if you don’t want me to but I can’t go one more minute without it,” he whispered his words as he dipped down slowly.

Her silence was his answer and when his lips smoothed over hers their moans of acceptance meshed together with mouths moving in synch.

She had missed his kiss. His breath. His tongue.

When he felt her fingers glide into his curls he thought he might pass out. He didn’t know if this was only for the night or if it meant forever, or maybe just something in between. But it was clear she was his in that moment.

She could feel him under his shorts, thickening up quickly. And that flipped a switch in her right away. She’d been denying him of everything. He might have flirted with some girls during their break but he hadn’t been with anyone. He was hers. Every part of him belonged to her and how could she ever refuse him again? To deprive him of what he wanted, needed felt abusive. She never wanted to hurt him.

“I’m sorry, Harry…” she spoke against his lips as she pushed him toward the bed. Her legs were about to give out from the adrenaline rushing through her veins. She needed to be in his lap or lying next to him so they could be closer. She needed him closer. “I was wrong to break up with you.”

Harry gasped at her words and when he felt her pushing him toward the mattress he stepped back and pulled her with him, their lips never parting.

He hoisted her up over his body as he sat on the bed and slid himself into the center and up to the headboard keeping her with him as he went.

Y/n settled her thighs over his and kept her mouth on his, “I want you. I’ve always wanted you, Harry. I’m so sorry…”

His hands were shaky as he hugged her tight. He hoped this meant for good. He hoped she wouldn’t regret this again. He had never regretted it.

“You mean it?” Harry kissed her softly before parting from the kiss and putting his hands on her hips.

Y/n nodded and scratched his scalp gently, “I mean it. I’m not done with you. I could never be. I was wrong when I thought it would be better to be apart.”

“Promise me? You’re not gonna leave me again?”

Leaning forward she nudged her nose into his and brought her hands down to cup his face, “I promise you. Never again. It was stupid. I need you, Harry.”

The whine that left his throat when she rocked her hips down over him had blood rushing to her limbs and she pulled at him to move his back away from the headboard before pushing him flat to lie down, “You need me too, don’t you, baby? Need me to take care of you?” She rolled her hips over his bulge and he nodded and breathed out the word yes.

“Poor thing. I’ve been so bad to you. I’m gonna spend so much time making it up to you. I promise, Harry.”

“Please, Y/n.”

“Missed you, Harry. Missed this…” she pecked his lips and then kissed her way down his jaw, neck, his pecs, and sternum. Her mouth left small wet spots as she moved and whispered over his skin, “I’m sorry for all of it, baby.”

Harry arched his back when she licked her tongue along the ridges of his abs and he whimpered, “I need you. I need you now.”

She smiled and looked up at him. They both had tears in their eyes but things had shifted quickly. Instead of uncertainty and grief their hearts were reacting with love and devotion. Y/n would show him her devotion the best she could.

She put her palms on his pecs and sat up to look him over, “So pretty. So perfect for me, Harry. I was dumb to think I could suppress my feelings for you.”

Harry brought his hands up to her low back and smoothed his palms downward over her bottom. Her little bikini was flimsy and so it was easy for Harry’s thumbs to slip under the fabric so he could keep hold of her.

She needed the moment to take him in. There was just enough light to see his face and torso, to see his lips parted and his chest rising and falling.

“You know that I’m yours too, right? You’re the only one who has my heart, Harry.”

Harry let out a quivering breath as he squeezed her bottom and in a strained voice spoke barely above a whisper, “Say it again.”

Settling herself over his hips and leaning down to put her lips close to his ear and her palm over his heart she spoke, “I’m yours. I love you, Harry.”

The moment she whispered those words into his ears, Harry felt like his heart would give out, like his nervous system was going to shut down… his ears became muffled as blood rushed to his head and his heart pumped viciously in his chest. His breath caught in his throat and he began to melt and sink down into the mattress and through the floor into the cement foundation of the room below and then into the earth. But as long as he had her in his arms he was alive and in love. He was safe with her heart and her words.

She felt his grip tighten on her bottom but he said nothing as the moment had him spinning and sinking and soaring.

She kissed his soft lips and he suddenly jolted back into his body with a moan as he opened his mouth wide against hers. It was as if her lips were a defibrillator to his heart.

He bent his knees slightly and bucked up toward her, keeping his hands on her to hold her down. He wasn’t going to let her go.

She rocked her hips over him slowly as they kissed and licked wetly.

Harry’s dick was in an uncomfortable position in his trunks and the lining was scraping the skin as Y/n pressed her crotch over him. And as if she’d somehow read his mind, she pushed against his hands that were holding her bum and reached between them to push his shorts down and free his length from its confines.

When he sighed she cooed at him, “Feels better like that, doesn’t it? You’re too big to be smushed in there like that.”

Harry wanted to just thrust into her and fuck her from his spot on the mattress, holding her down and make her take him. He was desperate to feel her but he knew she was in charge. She was going to make it worth the wait. But he was shaky and leaking, “Y/n, please…” He didn’t even know exactly what he was asking for but he wanted anything.

“Yes, Harry. I know… Tell me what you need, baby. I just want to make you happy. Want you to feel so good.”

Harry pulled at the fabric of her bikini bottom and the hint was loud enough that she understood just what he wanted.

“Want these off? Yeah?” She kissed his mouth and gently brushed the crotch of her bikini bottoms over his cock.

Harry nodded and groaned, “Yes. Off…”

Y/n pushed herself up but Harry’s big hands wouldn’t let go of her bottom so she put her palms over the top of his hands and pried them off, “Need to let me go so I can get these off for you, baby. Will you let go?”

Harry whined but he did as she said.

Y/n got to her knees between his legs and first removed her top and then slowly slid her bottoms down her legs as Harry sat up and pushed his trunks the rest of the way off his body, but the moment she was completely bare he pulled her back into his chest, not wanting to have any space in between their bodies for a moment longer.

She giggled at the abrupt force of him pulling at her but then her mouth was covered by his, rendering her silent as he slowly moved his lips, savoring her taste and her skin on his.

The feel of her body draped over him, her hips and her bottom under his palms, her thighs spreading for him to have access to anything he wanted… Euphoria.

He reached down further, letting his digits glide down her bottom to the back of her thighs and then in toward her pussy that was pressed to his shaft. He let the pads of his fingers feel her soft skin over his hard erection, the tiny swivel of her hips to keep them connected was seductive.

She felt his fingers reaching behind her gently stroking her crease so she moved herself the slightest to feel the tip of his finger dip inside. The motion caused their lips to part and Harry let out a low moan.

Putting her hands on his chest she pushed herself up and sat over his finger making it reach deeper inside, “I want another Harry,” she panted as she rolled her hips onto his hand.

Harry groaned as he pulled his finger out and then thrust two inside of her. She was doing most of the work. He hardly had to move his fingers or hand at all with the way she was writhing over him.

“Missed your hands and your fingers so much, Harry.”

“I missed you, Y/n.”

She continued rocking into his hand, wetting his palm and making his fingers sticky with herself. Her clit was pressed to Harry’s frenulum giving him that decadent sensation of her pussy gliding over him gently that he missed so much.

Y/n reached around and pulled at his hand to bring his fingers out of her and she lifted his wrist toward his mouth, pushing his fingers onto his tongue, “That’s yours, baby.”

Harry closed his eyes at the taste as he felt her move down his body before wrapping her hand around his shaft.

She licked his tip and kissed the thick vein on the underside. Harry gasped and groaned and pushed himself up to reach for her, pulling her face upward so she would look at him, “Please, Y/n. I need to be inside of you so bad.”

Y/n grinned, grasping his wrist as she turned her face to kiss his palm, “Need to feel my pussy around you?”

Harry nodded as she climbed back over his body and smoothed her soaked cunt over his length, “Anything you want, baby.”

When she angled her hips over him and pushed down over his thick crown Harry let out a loud and guttural moan. Too loud.

And while Leo was probably still passed out, Y/n didn’t need to have this moment interrupted by anyone. She continued to sink over him as she put her palm over his mouth, “Shhh… this is just for you and me. Okay? Be a good boy and keep quiet so I can fuck you without anyone else hearing.”

It was nirvana to be connected with him again. To feel his thick tip being pushed inside her body, splitting her down the center in smooth strokes, nudging and gliding into her g-spot with each roll of her hips. And even with Y/n’s palm covering his mouth the sound of what was going on in the room was quite blatant. She was filthy wet over his cock, slick and sticky as she fucked herself down on him, pushing him into her guts. The bed started off with the smallest rattle from the metal frame and turned into a repetitive clunking thud on the floors as she rocked her hips over his harder. Even with their silence, the atmosphere in the room was sex and elation. They were finally together again and their bodies were celebrating the joy their hearts felt.

She was already chasing her own orgasm after only a handful of minutes of having him inside of her but she wanted to drag it out. Make it last. They had all night. And she didn’t care if Leo did wake and wonder where she was. Let him find them. Let him hear the squeak of the mattress and the wet sound of her pussy being fucked by his son. She was Harry’s. Only Harry’s.

Pulling her hand from his mouth she leaned over him, pressing her soft tits to his chest, and kissed him slowly as she fucked him. They were breathing in through their noses sharply to fill their lungs so they didn’t have to part their mouths.

Harry’s hands found her round bum again, squeezing and pressing her down while her hands wound through his curls.

Harry was leaking quite desperately and doing everything he could to hold back from filling her with his warm come. He wanted to feel her around him for as long as possible, “M’gonna come, hold on…” his breathy words were pinched as he spoke quickly.

Y/n paused and sat up, bringing his hands from her bottom to her tits, urging him to squeeze them, “S’okay, baby. It’s okay to come.”

Harry’s chest heaved as he shook his head and pressed his thumbs over her nipples, “Want it to last. Need to be here with you forever.”

Licking her lips and keening at the way he pinched her left nipple she nodded, “Me too. Want to feel like this with you forever. We’ll take our time and go slow. But if you come it’s okay. There’s so much time for us. I know you needed me,” she ran her fingers over his pecks and up to his neck gently as she felt him throb inside of her. He had been dangerously close to coming.

“Tell me again, Y/n. Want to make sure it was real.”

Letting her fingers travel up to his chin and to the side of his face she whispered his new favorite phrase to him, “I love you, Harry.”

He whimpered and she felt his cock twitch. That had nearly been his end again. Just her words and the moment they were in was almost too much for him.

“Fuck. Nearly came right then, Y/n.” He panted and tried to calm his cock as he closed his eyes with a big smile on his face.

“You deserve to come, baby. You’ve been so good.”

She began to slowly rock over him again, her clit pasted over his pelvis with the head of his thick cock pushed into her tummy, dragging against her cervix. He filled her up so perfectly, made her wobble and ache from the fullness his sizable cock gave her.

Her pussylips gripped him lavishly, slipping up and down and stimulating him from base to tip, coating him in her cream and wetting his lap. His fingers sunk into her soft skin with a pinch as she inched down and up in steady motions.

“Do you hear that?” She sheathed him with her cunt and lifted gently so the sound of their bodies connecting and slipping together could be heard, “It’s because I belong to you, Harry. No one gets me so wet and so achy.”

Harry choked out a quiet moan and listened to the noise of his cock being fucked by her wet pussy. He could barely respond with any coherent words except to whisper her name and whine when she seated herself fully onto him and clenched.

“And I can tell you’re mine too baby. You’re cock gets so hard for me. Can’t help it can you? Need my love and my attention. All of my affection. My cunt. We need each other, Harry.”

Quiet gasps and moist bodies meeting and parting slowly began to get louder, faster.

Y/n was going to come and she didn’t know if she could stop it from happening this time. She wanted to go all night but she was going to explode if she didn’t come.

“Baby… look at me…” she spoke quietly as Harry opened his eyes to take her in. Soft tits jiggling and, her mouth parted, “I’m gonna come. I want you to come with me. Okay?”

He nodded, “Fuck yes. Come on me, Y/n…” Harry gritted his teeth when he felt her begin to fuck down over him harder.

Harry bent his knees and began to plunge himself into her, meeting her thrusts with harsh smacks and splatting noises.

She could no longer hold in her ecstasy or her cries of bliss.

“I love you, Harry! Fuck! I’m coming!”

Harry coughed out a loud groan and gasped as her walls clamped and spasmed over him. His balls thudded into her, knocking her upward when he felt the relief of his come pouring out of his cock and spurting into her cunt.

As they writhed and came together they heard a thud from in the hallway.

They both heard the noise but they were in the throes of their orgasms, whining and moaning together in bliss with pounding hearts as they kept their eyes on one another.

It didn’t matter to either of them who it was or what the noise was. They’d deal with that when they were ready. At that moment they were alone in a room together, bodies interlinked, adjoined, shaking, panting, bursting. Nothing else mattered. No one else could come between them.

Collapsing onto his chest she ran her nails over his scalp and felt his hair between her fingers as she kissed his neck and sighed. Harry was still trembling with the smallest smile on his pink lips, breathing hard, his chest rising and falling with Y/n moving up and down with his breaths.

“I love you so much, Harry.”

He turned to his face to push his nose against hers, “I love you so fucking much it hurts. I still can’t believe this is real. Is it?” His arm moved around her waist as he held her tight.

“Yeah. I’m not going anywhere. I don’t know what I’m going to tell Leo but you and I will think of something. I don’t want you and your father to have a bad falling out.”

Harry kissed her soft lips and grinned, “You’re gonna leave him?”

“Yeah. I don’t want anyone but you. And it’ll make things easier for him and Parker anyway,” she chuckled quietly. It was true. She was convinced that Leo was not just fucking the girl, he was very much into her, if not in love. Based on what she’d overheard of their conversation she was confident that leaving him wouldn’t be difficult. It was the reason she was leaving him that would make things complicated.

Harry nuzzled his face into Y/n’s cheek and kissed her jaw, “I can’t believe you want to be with me. It feels like a dream.”

“It does.”

When they heard another thud and the sound of someone moving around down the hall they looked at one another, “Think it’s your dad?”

Harry shrugged and shook his head, “Maybe Tyler? He could be back by now. Don’t know.”

Y/n put her cheek over Harry’s chest and wrapped her arms around him as they both laid back down, “I don’t want to go out there. Not tonight. I just want to be here with you. Just you and me. We can think about what we want to do in the morning.”

Harry smiled and rubbed her naked back with his warm palm, “I don’t care if he knows tonight or tomorrow. I’ll wait until the time is right if you want. Maybe telling him while we’re on vacation is a bad idea.”

Y/n nodded and closed her eyes. She didn’t care anymore either. Now that she had him back again she wasn’t going to be letting go. Sure things would probably be difficult. She’d need to actually put her degree to use and get a job. She’d have to give up all the luxuries that being married to Leo afforded her. And she’d need to face the possibility that Harry would have a falling out with his father and that people wouldn’t be so kind toward her given the situation.

But she couldn’t imagine it not being worth it. Harry was worth all of it. There was no way she’d deny herself of him any longer. He was suffering and so was she. And why keep lying? She was in love. She was in deep. Harry had gotten ahold of her heart early on. There was nothing to be done but to yield to it.

Much to Harry’s chagrin, Y/n urged him to get up so they could clean up. They were sticky and gooey all over. It was absolutely necessary.

But of course, cleaning up was made slightly more difficult with a playful Harry. And of course, he was playful. He’d just learned that Y/n loved him just as much as he loved her. He realized that they had been on the same page the whole time. That she had missed him and how bad it hurt her. They were feeling the same things but now? She realized what he’d known all along. That they would be better together. No matter what.

Harry’s low, quiet baritone rang in Y/n’s ear as she giggled, “And how about this?” He dragged the rag over her clit as she pushed at his arm but he wasn’t budging.

“Harry! You’re just supposed to clean it,” she whisper-shouted as he watched where he was dragging the damp rag through her messy labia.

“I like it dirty, though, Y/n,” he laughed his words quietly as Y/n grasped the cloth and yanked it from him.

“You’re something else,” she grinned at him as she wiped herself up.

Harry had her perched on the bathroom counter and he was stood between her legs when they heard a knock at the bedroom door.

The bathroom they were in was connected to the bedroom and they’d kept the door open.

“Did you lock the bedroom door?”

Harry shook his head. Neither moved an inch when they heard the second knock.

“No matter what, are you with me?” Harry held onto the bottoms of her thighs to keep her in place.

“Yes, Harry. I’m with you, baby.” She nodded as they heard the bedroom door open.

Both Y/n and Harry were naked and only half wiped up after having sex. Staring at one another they listened as the footsteps drew closer to them.

And the scene was just as anyone could imagine. A pair of lovers pressed together, watching the door as the intruder cast eyes on the infidelity. A bare woman sat on a countertop with her thighs held up by a man in between her legs.

Harry held up a protective arm to shield her from the eyes that peered in.

“Are you fucking kidding me?” Tyler laughed his words as he stepped forward enough that Harry and Y/n could see who it was.

Harry let out a breath and Y/n covered her face in embarrassment.

“Get the fuck out of here, dude!” Harry spoke quietly.

“I just came in here because Leo is awake and I’m pretty sure he heard you. I’ll be in my room if you need me.”

Y/n and Harry looked back at one another silently. Tyler said that he was pretty sure Leo had heard. But they wouldn’t know for sure until they faced him.

“Fuck.” Harry whispered, “I was hoping we could push this off until after vacation. What do we do?”

Y/n didn’t really know the answer. Ideally, they would have confronted Leo about this later on. Definitely not at the beginning of a two-week family vacation in Greece.

“We don’t know if he even heard anything. We can go out there now and get it out of the way. Or feel it out. See if he heard,” Y/n put her hands up to his chest.

Harry nodded and took a deep breath, “What if we just lock that door and get in bed together and wait until the morning?”

“We can do that too if you want. Maybe he has no idea and we can control when we tell him.”

The lovers smiled at one another in agreement before both leaning in to kiss. No matter what they were both on the same page now. There was no turning back.

“But if not. If he did hear we’ll figure it out. He doesn’t deserve you anyway, Y/n.”

Smiling up at him she realized that she was crazy but she was in love. And if anyone did deserve her it was Harry. The one who loved her. The one who was gentle with her. The one she loved.

“Yeah. We’ll figure it out together.”

This is the final part of this short series! Thank you for being here and reading!

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[readysteddiewoe]

Dustin, Lucas and Will find out about Steve and Eddie, completely on accident.

The trio are in the drama room after school, at least an hour before Dustin knows Eddie comes in to set up for their session. He hates being intruded on. Which is exactly why it is imperative that they are quick about this. Sneak in, let Will take notes on Eddie’s bard character design, get out before Eddie arrives and then walk back into Hellfire like nothing happened. Easy peasy.

The Party is going make Eddie his character costume for his birthday. Because he is impossible to buy for. Super picky, has really strong opinions about literally everything. So while Lucas plays look out, Dustin and Will obtain the relevant information they need to fulfill their plan.

Everything was going smoothly, until Lucas rushes into the room whisper shouting, “They’re coming, they’re coming!” waving his arms about for emphasis.

Of course, they could come up with some sort of reasonable lie for what they are doing at the drama room before their scheduled Hellfire session. Which Eddie would definitely see through, it’s like an annoying superpower he has. They’d rather not risk it. The fates of all three of their characters are in the hands of a madman.

And the three of them dive into different corners of the room, scrambling for a hiding place. Lucas and Dustin wedged in the space between the wall and a wardrobe overlooking the DND table with half of Dustin's body sticking out, barely covered by a sheer fabric draped over him. If Eddie so much as looks his way, it's game over for him.

Footsteps, followed by an all too familiar drawl. "Because Buckley's a liar and a cheater," Eddie comes into view sauntering backwards into the room, wagging a finger at someone just out of sight.

The last person Dustin expects to see, walks in right after him. "You still on that?" Steve says. What the fuck is Steve doing here? “Cos’ you were both cheating,”

Eddie beelines straight to the table, shit, too close, where his notebook is lying, rapidly starts flipping through the pages, looking for something. And then Steve is crowding into Eddie space, his chin hooked over Eddie's shoulder, an arm coiling around his waist to rest his palm on his stomach. Wait, what?

Dustin twists as inconspicuous as he could and gave Lucas a look he was sure fully conveyed his range of emotions at the moment. Lucas gives him a similar one right back. Okay so he isn't loosing it. That’s a minor relief.

Their voices are too low for Dustin to pick out anything except a couple words here and there, not enough to form a picture of what kind of discussion involves cuddling your friend standing up. Steve's face is hidden, but he can still see Eddie's. The other man tilts his head to whisper something directly in his ears. Something that has Eddie's cheeks blooming pink and he's gasping Steve's name and shoving him off with a grin.

Oh god, what in the alternate reality was happening here?

From the corner of his eyes he can see Lucas with both hands clasped over his mouth, shaking from all the silent giggles he’s holding in.

Steve goes right back to plastering himself across Eddie's back and this time his hand slides smoothly into Eddie's back pocket. Dustin has the sudden urge to cry out My eyes! because screw staying hidden. His whole world view is warping by the second.

Now Dustin is a man of science. He isn’t unaware of the whole same-sex attraction thing, it’s just that he had no idea Steve of all people, likes men. Or Eddie for that matter, although he’s never heard him talk about any girl he might’ve been interested in, when he thinks about it. Dustin used to chalk it up to the mysterious personality of Eddie Munson, before the whole Vecna fiasco that is. Now he knows Eddie is as much of an open book as a person could possibly be.

Steve on the other hand? Former king of Hawkins High, ladies man Steve Harrington likes men? And he likes Eddie? Dustin loves them both, fiercely. He knew they’d get along well, he just didn’t anticipate exactly how well. Is this why Steve won't date Robin? That still made no sense to him though, Steve had no problem dating other women before Eddie.

Dustin must’ve blacked out for the rest of it, because by the time he refocuses on the scene before him, Eddie is already done scribbling in his notebook and the two of them are leaving. Dustin feels like a metaphorical Hurricane has just passed though his mind misplacing furniture and tearing up wallpaper.

Eddie and Steve are EddieandSteve.

Their receding footsteps draw Will out of his hiding spot looking a little dazed. “Holy shit, I thought they were going to start making out right there,”

“Okay so we all saw that right? I wasn’t hallucinating?”

“No dude, they’re like totally dating,” Lucas is completely overcome with a case of the giggles now.

“At least Eddie was too distracted to catch us, right?” A dopey smiling is spreading on Will’s face. God his friends are weird.

————————

Steddie Masterlist

[howtofightwrite]

Obviously weapon substitutes are poorer than actual weapons and don't work the same way, but when characters are cornered and without a normal weapon (or don't even know how to fight, like in self-defence or just lashing out at someone), how do I have an idea of which objects make better weapons or how they actually might work? I don't want to write something that looks ridiculous even if the fights are going to be sloppy anyway. Any tips on how to approach this sort of stuff?

It's probably worth splitting characters into multiple groups when you're thinking about this. You have characters without combat training, characters with basic training, and characters with a sophisticated understanding of combat. Each one is going to look for something distinct.

For an inexperienced character, when they look for an improvised weapon, they're likely to prioritize items that they think, “can be used as a weapon.” Usually because it looks like something else. Sometimes, this overlaps, and you'll see something that, kindais a weapon, like a claw hammer, or can effectively function as a weapon, like a crowbar. Even then, because this is a character who doesn't have combat training, they're not going to be using it effectively, and they'll be vulnerable in a straight up fight against someone who knows what they're doing.

Inexperienced characters are also likely to look at any sufficiently heavy object as a potential one shot blow to the head with the intention of knocking their foe unconscious in a surprise attack. In spite of what you're used to seeing, this isn't likely to do exactly what you want. Knocking someone out is a very fine line between, pissing them off, and maybe disorienting them, without really incapacitating them, or outright killing them. There isn't much in between these outcomes. An inexperienced character is likely to expect this will end the fight, and unless it's lethal, it usually won't.

Someone with basic training and experience is more likely to look for items that can be effectively weaponized. This may include things like being able to take a broom handle and use it effectively as a short staff, or turning a pair of scissors into an improvised dagger. Basic training will probably lead to recognizing potential weapons that an inexperienced character might overlook.

Someone with a lot of combat training and a fairly advanced understanding of physiology, is when you start seeing things like, “I can turn anything in this room into a lethal weapon,” though, granted, boasts like that do tend to overstate the steps necessary to turn something like a lampshade into an improvised garrote, or gloss over just how precise you need to be to turn a ballpoint pen into a lethal tracheotomy. In some cases it's not strictly untrue, you can turn a lot of household objects into weapons, but you're basically never going to be in a situation where a thumbtack is a more viable weapon choice than the bulletin board it was attached to.

In the case of experienced or sophisticated fighters, they can probably realize that bringing a weapon to bare against your foe doesn't always mean moving the weapon, sometimes, it's more than enough to simply move your foe into your improvised weapon of choice. Anyone might realize that the blade off a paper cutter could make for a pretty good improvised machete, but an inexperienced fighter might not have the ability to get a foe under an intact paper cutter to use it against them. Sophisticated fighters will have probably mastered putting the U in “industrial accident.”

Weaponizing the environment is something that can get really out of hand, but can also offer an effective way to sell a character's efficiency with violence. It is the kind of situation where having an actual weapon would always be a better option. For example, “why don't you just shoot them?” But, it works to keep a fight interesting, especially if the actual weapons aren't an option, for whatever reason.

-Starke

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[denial-permanente]

Hi there,

I’ve been a follower of your for quite a while and have to say I admire the dynamic you and Tom share, and the strength and closeness that your base relationship reflects.

I send this seeking your opinion, and I apologize if you’ve already answered this before.

I find myself in a precarious situation where I have, slowly, yet steadily and surely, become interested in chastity. For me, and I say this with as much honesty as one can, my interest in this isn’t fetishized as is more Domme focused. As in, I do not find myself interested in the idea because it gets me all hot and bothered (despite the fact that it does), but is more my desire to offer my Domme something I know I have not fully internalized and am fully comfortable with. Its beyond my comfort zone but that is where growth and magic take place. I will want yo say that my apprehension or anxiety are not because I don’t want to be thrown/throw myself into the deep end, but a nervousness about the realities and challenges of how it will play out if that makes sense? It’s sort of a ‘careful what you wish for’ kind of situation.

I am currently seeing a very special woman who is very much on the dominant side of things and we’ve talked about some aspects that our dynamic would involve. We have discussed orgasm control, and she has made it clear to me that this is an expectation she has of me, but chastity is yet to be discussed.

We have been nurturing a very beautiful connection in our relationship, but the thought of her potentially wanting me in chastity and wanting to wear my key on her neck for the world to see (even if fee pick up on it) makes me a little nervous. I feel like that would break me as a submissive, it would make me realize my place infinitely more deeply and would bring me into a state of submission that is beyond what Im used to or know what to expect from.

So I guess my question is: why do you think Im feeling this way and do you think I should override this nervous and just surrender to that desire of hers (as it comes up) fully? I know these are questions only I could answer but I appreciate your experience and take on this greatly.

Thank you in advance :)

Like a lot of men, you may be way overthinking all this. You're seeing a domme, you have chemistry, and things are going well. And instead of just enjoying all this you are worried that things will go... too well? 🙄

First of all, she may not even want to wear one of those ugly keys. I'm sorry... I know a lot of you men get all hot and bothered but we are not 14 years old here. Those keys are ugly and no woman wants to wear one especially if they are dressed up.

Second, she wants to control your orgasms. That is perfectly acceptable with or without a cage. By asking... demanding that she take control of your orgasms she makes sure that your desire is focused on her and not on your penis. I told my husband many years ago that I wanted all of the control over that and even in times when he was not caged he took that very seriously. To me it represented a huge commitment... and women love to see commitment from men.

I guess what I'm saying is to forget about the cage. That is... the cage is not to prevent orgasms, it is to prevent accidents and temptation... both yours and hers.

🔒Tom here. This is a point that gets overlooked a lot: cages do not prevent orgasms, they simply make them inconvenient. Long before my permanently locked status, I considered it a personal challenge to refrain from unauthorized orgasms. Once, my wife had me going for over 15 very difficult months, no cage. And it's true - women love their men to show commitment.

I also think that you're overthinking this. Orgasm control is a step, wearing a cage for her is another step. I understand that guys can have mixed emotions of love/hate/fear over orgasm control/denial, but instead of approaching it as something taken away from you, try looking at it as a sacrifice you are making for her.

[writing-for-life]

I know I don’t have to do this, but I just want to say how much I appreciate everyone who regularly stops by my blog or interacts with my posts.

I know I don’t have to do this either, but I also want to say that I love when people on here actually talk to each other and comment instead of just staying in their own little bubble. I think we need more of that to get back to a fandom culture that isn’t driven by binary thinking, metrics, weird ideas of BNFdom/fandom hierarchies and seeing everything as “content” we consume for a quick fix. It’s the human element that makes fandom worthwhile.

And I know that I have to do the next thing least of all, but I also want to apologise to everyone I overlook by accident, or whom I don’t manage to get back to. My blog has really exploded over the past year, which was very unexpected, and I get hundreds of notes every day (439 notifs on old and new posts were waiting for me when I checked in this morning, and that’s only the ones that came in while I was sleeping). I don’t want to switch off notifs completely because I want to know what’s going on and interact, and I try to stay on top of it all. But I do this in my spare time like most of us, write and curate in batches to feed my queue and otherwise only keep an eye on personal interactions like messages, asks, people who tagged me. There are comments and reblogs with commentary I would often love to get back to, but I don’t always manage, plus I know some stuff simply slips through. And I sometimes feel bad about it because as one might have gathered from the second paragraph, the connection is what really matters to me.

So if I ever forget or don’t manage to get back to you, it’s nothing personal. It’s just that I also work and have a family.

So thanks again, and lots of love to everyone 🖤

[slaymitchabernathy]

An Eternity

When Coriolanus comes home, he finds their bedroom empty.

He doesn’t worry though. Not like he used to.

He does find Petunia in her usual spot, right below the window in the living room, soaking up the last bits of sunlight.

He slowly climbs up the steps that lead to the rooftop, two hot cups of tea in his hands. Tea always seems to make everything better.

When he reaches the top, he’s welcomed by the scent of roses. She says he smells like roses, that’s why she likes coming up here so much.

She’s sitting on one of the benches, overlooking the city, the Capitol. Her blonde hair blows in the wind.

“You should wear a coat, my love,” he says before setting the two cups down on the edge of the table next to the bench. It’s October now, it’s getting colder by the day and he worries for her health even more than ever now.

Soarynn looks up at him and gives him that smile that he fell in love with all those years ago. “I’m not cold,” she says but he can see the goosebumps on the skin of her arms. She’s always cold.

He simply hums and shrugs off his suit jacket, gently draping it over her shoulders. Coriolanus lets out a soft groan as he sits down on the bench, it was a long day at work. It always feels long when he’s not with her.

“How was your day? Did your meetings go well?” She asks him, her hand instantly finding his. Coriolanus nods and stares out at the skyline, “Yes, everything went quite well. I might get some time off in a couple of weeks, to take care of you.”

Soarynn lets out a frustrated sigh and Coriolanus gives her a stern look, “Don’t argue with me about this darling, you need proper care at all times of the day.” Soarynn shakes her head and takes her cup of tea, bringing the rim to her lips, “I’m perfectly fine and I’m not alone during the day.”

Coriolanus already knows that Soarynn’s idea of company is Petunia but they both know he’s right. Soarynn needs proper care, like a nurse. But she’s always been so insistent on her independence.

He doesn’t have it in him to fight her on it, not when she’s already lost so much.

“I just want…I just want to have as much time with you as possible,” he whispers. His eyes burn with tears but he’s no stranger to these emotions.

Not since the diagnosis.

He remembers it perfectly well. How they went to the doctor with concerns after Soarynn had a seizure. He hoped it might have been a one-time thing, a freak accident. It was much worse than that.

It was a fatal illness, no cure, no timeline to predict how much longer she had on earth. How much longer she had with him.

It was so unfair. It wasn’t right that she had to go through this, to know that her life was coming to an end. Soarynn was just starting her life, she was still so young, so promising.

She deserved more time.

He did everything he could. Bought all the medications, got second and third opinions. Nothing worked.

All they could do was try to make the most of the time they still had together.

He watches Soarynn take a sip of her tea and can’t help but notice how her hand trembles when she sets it down.

She’s getting weaker by the day. He’s surprised she’s still able to make it up the stairs. And suppose she fell one day, who would help her?

But Coriolanus doesn’t have it in him to confine her to their bedroom. Soarynn deserves to live her life to the fullest. And she has. He’s taken her to the zoo, the ballet, he even arranged for a trip to District Four so she can see the ocean. She doesn’t know about it yet. He’s going to surprise her in a month, tell her on her birthday.

He’s going to propose to her at the beach.

She’s always wanted to see the ocean and Coriolanus doesn’t want to spend one more day without being her husband, without being tied to her for an eternity.

“Well, what did you get up to today my love?” He asks, hoping a majority of her day wasn’t spent lying in bed, slowly withering away.

It’s been hard to watch her slowly fade away. It started with her skin. Her beautiful, tan skin slowly faded day by day. Then her eyes. Her dazzling blue-gray eyes lost their spark. Little by little, she started losing weight until none of her clothes fit her anymore.

Soarynn tries to act like it’s all fine, like she’s fine but Coriolanus has heard her cry before, watched her stare at her reflection in the mirror, and hate what she sees.

She’s losing herself as much as he’s losing her.

“Oh, you know, I did some reading, finished that book you got me the other week. And then the girls came over and I gave them some of my clothes.”

Coriolanus furrows his brows, “Why did you give your clothes away darling?”

Soarynn has beautiful dresses and clothes, top-of-the-line. To give them away confuses him. Soarynn waves him off, “None of them fit me anymore.”

Coriolanus takes his cup and doesn’t say anything. Sometimes, he wishes she didn’t act like this, like she’s already accepted her fate. If she gives all her clothes away, what’s to stop her from doing the same with her shoes and bags? He’ll have nothing left of her by the time she’s gone.

How strange to think one day she’ll be gone. But he can’t focus on that. Won’t focus on that. They’ll take it day by day, like they always have.

꧁ ꧂

“What do you want to do for your birthday, my love?”

When Soarynn doesn’t reply, Coriolanus peeks his head out of their shared closet to find her struggling to stand up from their bed. Her legs are trembling and her face is pale. “Let me help you, darling,” he says, quickly striding over to grab her waist but she shakes her head. “No,” she grits out, “I…I can do it just fine by myself.”

But she can’t. And when she goes to fall, he’s there to catch her.

And it breaks his heart to see Soarynn cry. Usually, she doesn’t let him see her like this, so vulnerable and weak. “I want to cut my hair,” she gasps out between sobs. Coriolanus wraps his strong arms around her as they sit on the floor, “Why would you want to cut your hair darling?”

Soarynn has beautiful blonde hair that falls below her waist. It’s a bright blonde, nearly platinum but it compliments her beautifully.

“It’s starting to fall out,” she whispers, burying her face in his chest, “I might as well get ahead of it and cut most of it off.”

Coriolanus swallows because he doesn’t want her to cut her hair, to give up so easily but he has to support her no matter what.

He’d never forgive himself if he didn’t do everything he could for Soarynn while she was still alive.

“Okay,” he says softly, pressing a kiss to the top of her head, “we can go get your hair cut.”

꧁ ꧂

Coriolanus watches as the hairdresser cuts Soarynn’s hair off. It falls onto the floor like a golden halo around the chair.

He watches Soarynn’s face through the mirror. There’s a single tear running down her face but she remains strong and resilient.

“Short hair is very in for the summer, do you two have any big summer plans?” The hairdresser asks the two of them. Coriolanus manages a polite smile and shakes his head, “No, not really.”

He can’t tell her about the beach, not yet.

Soarynn’s birthday is two weeks away and then he can surprise her.

By the time they’re done, Soarynn’s hair comes up to her chin. "You look beautiful," he tells her as they leave the hair salon. Soarynn shrugs, "I look different."

When they go home, Petunia is more than curious about her owner's new haircut. Coriolanus watches the two with a smile on his lips. Petunia loves Soarynn with all her heart, it'll be his responsibility to make sure she'll looked after once Soarynn is gone.

"Aren't you a proper little lady?" Soarynn asks as she ties a pink ribbon around Petunia's neck, giggling when Petunia bats at her hand.

Coriolanus used to worry about how Soarynn would be when Petunia passed away, how inconsolable she'd be, and how grief-stricken the death would leave her.

But she'll be gone before Petunia. Then it'll be just him and the cat.

How terrifying to love something that death can so easily touch.

꧁ ꧂

"I want you to meet new people," Soarynn says gently, her small hand engulfed in his large one.

Coriolanus blinks away the tears as he sits at her bedside. It feels impossible to think about anyone else in the world when the woman he loves the most is dying right in front of him. "You're the only one I want to be with Soarynn," he tells her, his voice trembles but he's so past caring.

Today she should be turning twenty-three, instead, she's bedridden, and on the cusp of death. The sickness progressed quicker than they thought. The months he thought he had with her are now hours.

Soarynn will never get to see the beach. He will never propose.

"I was going to take you to the beach," he whispers, "ask you to be my wife, to be tied to my soul for an eternity and now I fear that I'll never be given the chance."

Pain reflects in Soarynn's eyes and he can't tell if it's from the sickness or the sadness. "Coryo, you'll always have me, always. My soul is entangled with yours far too well for wedding rings to truly mean anything."

Coriolanus nods and tears fall freely down his face, he's losing her.

Soarynn looks up at the ceiling, a faraway look in her eyes, "I'm scared," she whispers, "I must admit that I don't want to leave."

Coriolanus leans down and presses a soft, gentle kiss on her cheek, "Don't be scared my love, I'll hold your hand the entire way."

Soarynn lets out a soft wheeze, "Don't let go."

It happens so quickly. The way her eyes finally close, and the last breath leaves her small body. She's resting now, no longer in pain.

Coriolanus cries, he sobs and shouts at the sky. He wanted more, more time, more laughs and smiles. But his sweet girl was so tired, she deserves to rest.

He'll see her again soon. Until then, he'll have Petunia, he'll hear someone laugh and think it's her. But one day, he'll see her again.

They'll have eternity.

| tumblr oneshot/drabble |

[gingiesworld]

A Friend

Jane Banner x GN! Reader (Platonic)

Warnings: Angst. Fluff. Mentions of Rape/Death.

Word Count: 1.9k+

Taglist : @natashamaximoff-69 @canvascoloredin @wizardofstories @louxbloom @wandanats-goodgirl @the-ox-fan20 @ladyqueenxoxo @aemilia19 @wandaromamoff69 @mfd-101 @dorabledewdroop @marvelogic @dopeyouth @karsonromanoff @bimad (if you want to be added to my taglist, please DM me or comment)

18+ MINORS DNI

It was no secret that Agent Y/L/N was hard on their team, they always were driven to solve any case thrown their way, but that made Jane hate them even more. She only knew a small amount about them, Y/N was never one to open up about their private life.

“So, we have a serial rapist on our hands.” Y/N informed them all as they handed their team a file. “This person has seven victims already.”

“Do you think it’s a copycat of the perp from 5 years ago?” One agent asked as Y/N pursed their lips.

“Maybe.” They answered them. “But we never really caught them from five years ago.” Jane watched as they tensed up slightly. “There is a possibility it is the same person.”

“So, what is the plan?” Jane questioned as she flicked through the file.

“We need to map out each victim’s last days, find out every location they have been and talk to everyone they have ever spoken to.” Y/N told them. “We will also need to talk to each of the families, get an idea of who the victim is because there may be a factor that has been overlooked.” They read out names of who would be teaming up and splitting the tasks accordingly. They approached Jane with an expressionless face. “Come on, we have work to do.” They told her before heading out of the briefing room, Jane rolled her eyes as she followed them to their car.

“So, where are we going?” She asked them as they started the car.

“Elle’s boyfriend.” They told her as they kept their eyes on the road. “She was the first victim and we need to know how she acted leading up to this.”

“Ok.” Jane mumbled as she kept looking over the files. She also had the files from the last investigation they had just been talking about, seeing a familiar name. Elizabeth Y/L/N, then she glanced at the ring that remained on their finger.

“Let me do the talking.” They told her as they shut off the engine before getting out of the car. Heading inside an auto shop. “Mr Brody? May we have a moment?” They asked as they flashed their badge.

“Yeah.” He nodded as he led the two of them through to the staff room. “Is this about Elle? Did you find the bastard?” He asked as Jane closed the door behind them.

“We haven’t yet, but we plan on finding him and not stopping until he is behind bars. For the rest of his life.” They informed him. “We just need to know if there was anything different about Elle leading up to her death?”

“No.” He whispered as he looked down. “It was just a normal week. She was coming home later than usual from her shift at the hospital.” He looked between the agents. “She called and apologised over and over again because she promised Sam that she would be back in time to read to him. There was nothing out of the ordinary.”

“Does she walk or drive to work?” They asked him as he shook his head.

“She walks to work.” He answered. “When she works long shifts, she doesn’t really want to drive in case of an accident.” Y/N nodded as they took down some notes.

“Would you be able to map out the route she walks to and from work.” They asked him. “It’s just so we can get the traffic cam footage from that night to see if there's anything out of the ordinary.”

“Do you think he followed her?” He asked them as Y/N sighed

“We can’t say for sure right now, but we need to cross off every possibility.” They told him. “But once we have our answers, we will let you know.” With that the two agents left the auto shop, ready to speak with the families of the other victims.

“How do you expect us to catch this person?” Jane asked them as they sighed before looking over at her.

“I know you are new to this department, but I have my ways of getting to the bottom of the cases I work on.” They told her.

“Or allowed to work on.” She murmured as Y/N pulled up, turning to face her, anger evident in their eyes. “I saw a name in the case files from five years ago. Elizabeth.”

“Don’t.” They snarled as she smirked. “I don’t owe you any explanation nor do I need to tell you about myself.” With that they got out of the car, Jane hot on their heels as they entered the building.

“I just don’t get it.” Jane said as she followed them into their office. “You weren’t allowed to work on the case five years ago for personal reasons, they never caught the guy and you’re allowed to work on a case that may be the same guy now.”

“Get out.” They told her firmly, neither paying attention to the small crowd outside of the office. “Get out of my office now.”

“I just need to know who I am working with. I am owed that much.” She told them as they chuckled.

“You really want to know?” They spoke angrily, Jane could see that she had hit a nerve. “My wife, the woman who I loved with all of me. She was pregnant when she died.” Jane started to feel bad. “Yeah. She was raped and murdered while she was carrying our child.” They stepped closer and she could see the years of grief and pain in their eyes. “So yes, I wasn’t allowed to work on the case because of personal issues.”

“Why is it different now?” Jane asked them.

“I have a 100% run on cases. Every case I have worked on, I have solved it.” They told her. “The agent who was in charge five years ago, he was getting old, ready for retirement. So he got lazy, and decided to just call it an unsolved case.” They took a shaky breath. “They failed my wife and child. They failed every victim before her, and I don’t intend to stop until he is behind bars and rotting.” She watched as they moved back behind their desk. “Now please leave. Ask Mouth about the traffic cams from the night Elle Brody was found, from the time she left the hospital.” Jane just nodded as she left, heading straight to the IT department.

Y/N sat with their head in their hands, the picture of their wife always remained on their desk, wiping away a stray tear that had escaped.

As the weeks went on, the team worked tirelessly as they narrowed down on suspects. Y/N’s eyes narrowed on to a familiar name, similar to the agent who led the case five years ago.

“What is it?” Jane questioned as everyone’s eyes were on Y/N and the director.

“Do we have an address for either of them?” Y/N asked their superior.

“We can get them.” He answered as Y/N nodded.

“We are going to need two separate teams.” Y/N said as they turned around to Mouth. “Get me their addresses and any place they may be hanging out.” They turned back to everyone. “Ok, I need a team to go for Horace, he is an ex agent. Retired around the time the old case was closed, marked as unsolved. So, we will need to be smart with him, and the others will go for Thomas. I want him more than Horace but I also want answers from him.”

“I think it’s best if you sit this one out.” Directeur Jameson told them.

“No.” They shook their head.

“Y/N, this is now personal to you.” He told them. “You have gotten this far. You got to the bottom of this case, now let me finish it.”

“But.” They tried as he looked at Jane.

“Please take them home.” He ordered her as she nodded, taking their arm as they didn't even fight. “I will make sure they both pay for this Y/N. I promise.”

“Keep me updated.” They told him as he nodded, they followed Jane out of the building and to her car.

“I need your address.” She told them, she listened as they directed her to their house. Pulling up in their driveway.

“Thank you.” They spoke quietly as Jane smiled slightly, watching as Y/N got out of the car, soon following them up the path. “You can go home Jane.”

“I am not leaving you on your own right now.” She told them. “You need a friend more than ever.” They sighed and allowed her inside, leading her to their kitchen.

“It’s nice here.” She told them as she accepted the drink from them.

“Elizabeth was the one who decorated here.” They told her. “She picked out everything when we first moved in together. That was almost 13 years ago.” They watched as Jane looked around. “I haven’t really had the heart to redecorate.”

“Everyone grieves in their own time.” She told them.

“You speak like you know.” They said as they led her through to the living room.

“Well, we have all lost someone close to us at one point.” She told them. “My best friend was mugged and stabbed when we were in high school.” She took a sip of her drink. “That is why I wanted to become an agent. I wanted to get to the bottom of the cases that no one else could.”

“You wanted to be someone that people can count on.” They nodded as she smiled. “I really liked solving problems, so I actually went to MIT to study engineering.”

“Then how did you?” She asked them as they chuckled.

“I guess I never wanted to just be an engineer, work in a lab or a workshop.” They told her honestly. “So I joined the academy. I know, it was a waste of my degree but I just wanted to do something that means more you know.” They told her before a smile formed on their face. “Then I met Elizabeth when I was sent to the ER. I was shot in the shoulder, I was kind of cocky when I was younger.” Jane laughed at their words. “I remember flirting with her, asking her out and she turned me down, but after multiple trips to the ER, I finally wore her down.”

“So she felt pity on you?” Jane teased as Y/N laughed with a nod.

“She did.” They took a deep breath. “It only started as a cocky ego trip but I couldn’t picture my life without her by my side. That’s why it broke me when she was taken from me.” They gave Jane a smile. “Thank you.”

“What for?” She asked them, confused.

“For being a friend. I’ve forgotten what it feels like to have a friend.” They told her as their phone vibrated, they glanced at it before looking at Jane. “They’ve got them.”

“It’s over.” She whispered as Y/N took a deep breath, soon letting out a strangled sob.

“I can’t believe it.” They cried as Jane moved to wrap her arms around them. “She’s finally getting the justice she deserves.” Jane held them as they cried, knowing this was the closure they really needed from this case.

[celestialspecial]

In Cold Blood (Pt. 2)

Warnings: Dub con, knife play, blood, smut/p in v-do i even need to say its 18+ (also dont do it with serial killers irl....you know this)

The pounding relentless beat of the club echoed out onto the pavement. The sidewalk under your feet seemed to shake with each new bass drop, lights from the floor to ceiling windows washed along the crowd waiting in line.

You stood single file, all asses and elbows waiting to get to the front velvet ropes. Your nerves were frayed, the last few weeks had been leading you up to this moment. 

Once you had a photo of the killer with his mask it was easier than before to find snippets of him on local cctv camera footage. His steps were more traceable but you still didn’t know his motive. 

The more you learned the less it made sense. 

You'd tracked his wanderings for over a month now, the trail had gone cold but you had it on good authority he'd be here tonight. The Killer, looking for his next victim.

With some intense persuasion your team had allowed you to go under cover and act as bait to draw out the madman. Your skimpy dress and overall look blended you into the background of the crowd waiting in line.

You looked like you deserved to be there. Were meant to be there.

After god knows how long of waiting in line you finally were able to escape the chilly outdoors and feel the intense heat of the ravenous club before you.

Bright lights pooled the dance floor and if you had thought the outside was crowded this was even worse. How anyone managed to dance was beyond you but that wasn't why you were here.

Making your way to the bar in hopes of escaping the intense smells and rhythmic dancing to clear your head. A buzz from your phone got your attention.

One of your colleagues.

"He's there." Your heart beat increased its pace. Eyes darting around the mass of gyrating people but you couldn't see shit. Everyone was moving so erratically, it would be impossible to find him.

After a moments pause you wondered if maybe this was a wash and to call for backup and corner the bastard wherever he was here instead of coercing him to follow you somewhere private where an arrest could be made.

At that your phone buzzed again. What the fuck did they want?

Only this time it was a call. From an unknown number. He was here.

"Hello?"

"Detective. You look mouthwatering tonight." You gulped in response suddenly realizing this might be a bad idea but taking a shot from the bartender strengthened your resolve.

"Do I?"

"Oh yes. Have you come here to arrest me, Detective? Looking like that?"

"Maybe I came here for other things."

A long pause on the other end had you believing he had hung up until you heard a brief inhale on the end of the line.

"Is that so?"

"Will you turn me down?"

This was very dangerous. You were being reckless with your safety but if it drew him out and you had a chance to throw this sucker away for life you'd take it.

"Never."

"Then come get me."

"No... I think you need to find me first. Hasn't that always been your goal? To find me."

You cursed under your breath. Of course he wasn't going to make this easy for you. Why had you been so stupid.

"I don't know if you know this but you picked the most crowded club in the city tonight."

"Don't worry. I'll give you hints. But I can tell you right now you're very cold."

You stepped away from the bar and turned left.

"Warmer."

You considered that when you caught him you'd just kill him and say it had been an accident. And yet a sick and twisted part of you felt a thrill you couldn't explain.

And honestly were afraid to examine further.

Another few twists and turns to the tune of, "Warmer" and "you're getting colder." Lead you to a bustling staircase that took you up to the balcony overlooking the entire club.

Masses of people swarmed around you and at some points it was hard to even hear the phone if he had said anything at all.

You reached a hallway that was suspiciously empty. Lines of velvet padded doors with brass buttons on their exterior beckoned you forward.

“You’re getting warmer, Detective.”

Your hand twitched, trying not to rest on your concealed weapon.

“Warmer.

You'd made it halfway down the hall when you decided this was enough and it was time for backup. Your left heel stuck in place before you were about to turn tail and run.

“You’re burning up.” 

 A large hand snaked around your waist pulling you away from the door you had been looking at wearily. Then it all went black.

You came to, eyes blearily blinking in the low light. A deep red hue filled the room, curtains of lush fabric draped the ceiling, hanging askew and clinging to matching red sofas.

A black crystal chandelier hung above your head. The pounding of the music from the club could still be heard, the bass vibrating the surface you were on. 

Stuck on. No, strapped to.

You wiggled your wrists realizing they were handcuffed to the table beneath your body. Your senses started to come to you faster as your breathing increased with each panicked heartbeat.

Your ankles were tied down as well, a chain clanging against the surface. The sound blunted by the space. 

“Help!” You shouted, screaming as loud as you could. “Somebody?! Anybody!”

“They can’t hear you.” That voice. You’d heard it before. So many times before, but this time it wasn’t distorted by a device. No scrambling or altered sound. Deep, even more attractive than you’d thought.

If you didn’t know better you’d say it was almost warm, inviting. Like a lamb to slaughter, that’s how you felt. A wolf in sheep’s clothing and you were falling for it.

It was nearly impossible to lift your head fully to look upon your captor. Out of the shadows in the corner stood a man, tall, lean, leather jacket scuffed and torn and the mask. You recognized that.

He toyed with a large silver knife, pressing the point into the pad of his thumb, mask downturned as he examined the large weapon before you.

Turning back to look at you he traced the knife along the padded velvet walls. Cocking his head towards them as he approached where you lay.

“These walls are solid thick. The padding also helps block out the noise.” You couldn’t see his face but his eyes…they were black and they caught the red light just right and they almost-glimmered. 

When he spoke next you could hear the smirk on his lips. 

“Perfect place for screaming…of all kinds.” Your eyes closed, brows drawn together, a shaky rasp escaping your lips.

“You’re going to kill me.”

His head tilted to the side, taking you in, probably in more ways than you realized. Moving closer to you, the glimmering buck knife scraping against the wood of the table. You could feel your pulse racing in your neck, knees wobbling.

Once he’d approached your side, cracked white mask looking over you he lifted the glinting blade. You watched with wide eyes as the edge came down as he drew lines over your exposed flesh.

“Now why would I do that?” Cool metal bit into the side of your thigh, not enough to draw blood but enough to have you gasp at the pressure. His bottomless eyes darted to your face at the sound.

You didn’t need to see his face to know he was smiling. Captivated by you writhing on the table before him. Setting the knife down to rest on the center of your torso the man before you removed one of his gloves.

Flesh met flesh as he placed his large hand on your inner thigh, the rough pads of his fingers pressing into your heated skin. His skin felt warm against your leg, you’d waited for it to feel cold, clammy but it was neither of those things.

“I’ve watched you for so long, Detective. Been wanting to feel how soft your skin is for far too long.” 

You wanted to fight it but you couldn’t help your poor body giving in to his caresses. Each stroke against your knee, shin, then moving back up to rest so close to your center. 

You tasted blood from how hard you’d bit your lower lip. Dying to not moan, to not let him know you were enjoying this. But he knew. Dammit he knew. 

“You knew I’d take the bait. And I did. Because you KNOW me. And I know you.” 

“You don’t know me.” You spit out, you tugged against your constraints to drive home your point. 

“I know you’re enjoying this.” 

“And how do you figure that?” 

“Because I am.” Fuck him. That’s all you could think. All you wanted but didn’t dare admit. He was a psycho…and maybe you were too for wanting him this badly. 

He retrieved his knife, this time letting it settle between your thighs, the tip catching on the string of your underwear. You could feel the blade against your skin and you did your best to breathe in shallow gulps.

His wrist flicked and what little pathetic swatch of fabric you’d had on under your dress was done for. An elastic snapping noise, a sting as it smacked against your skin and then he moved back a foot.

Pulling with him the knife and your underwear torn and tattered stuck to the tip of the blade. He held up the weapon and its new bundle of fabric to examine it, fingering the underwear with his free hand.

“Detective. These appear to be wet.” 

If you’d had your gun you would’ve shot him. Or you’d like to think you would in this moment. Anything to get out of this situation. Scorching heat seared across your face, you could feel it beading up on the back of your neck as well.

He leaned forward, bracing his hands against the table, fingers brushing against your sides in the process. 

“Care to explain?” His head gestured to the sad excuse for underwear left. 

“Fuck you!”

“Soon, but not yet.” His gloveless hand resumed its place on your inner thigh but this time his fingers dared higher. You could feel him part you and drag a long finger up your center, dipping in before pulling his hand back to inspect.

You wanted to cross your legs, anything to prevent you from wanting more. The noises that had scratched at the back of your throat  as you felt him briefly inside you, were scrambling to escape. 

His fingers were coated in your wetness, masked face exploring your own, gauging your reaction. Then he slipped those same fingers under his mask, a sucking noise could be heard and his eyes rolled back.

“You taste just as I imagined.” Your eyes met his, instead of looking away you kept your focus. Challenging him. He wanted to play games, so could you. 

Maybe he was right, maybe you two did have some connection because as your eyes remained locked with his you could feel the static energy in the room shift around you. 

“What else have you imagined?” 

The hand of his that held the knife lifted again, the lip of the blade coaxing under the hem of your dress. The tip poking through the satin fabric, slicing as it moved upwards. 

Cool air rushed over your heated skin, the fabric falling away. You carefully watched the knife as it made its way across your stomach, towards your chest and finally reaching your neckline.

The stitches popping as the dress shredded away, two useless swath's of fabric toppling to the floor. Exposing your remaining lingerie that you had carefully selected for the night, something that would fit nicely under your dress.

He let out a low whistle from under his mask. Taking the knife and quirking it underneath a loose bow on your black lace bustier. Untying the ribbon as he twisted the knife expertly.

“Detective. Is this all for me?” 

“Untie me and find out.” At that he chuckled, plucking another seam with the blades tip.

“You’re very clever, but not that clever.” 

He tapped your cheek with the flat side of his knife, wiggling his finger in a childlike admonishment as he moved to the end of the table. Standing between your legs that were still strapped down.

You watched as he slipped the knife into his back pocket, removing his other glove somewhere in the process. 

The way he watched you as he moved. Those depthless eyes examining every inch of your body. How they shone a little brighter as his gaze landed on your exposed lower half.

He lowered himself onto his elbows but not before clutching your hips and tugging you further down the table towards him. You grunted at the tightness overwhelming your bound wrists, scraping against the metal handcuffs.

Then you felt his mouth against you. Crying out at the feel of his lips sucking against you. Lapping up your juices and teasing the sensitive flesh there. 

Your eyes squeezed shut, panting, then moaning. His evil mouth coaxing every new noise from your body. Trying to look down and see him but the mask sat on top of his head still blocking your view.

That tightness and aching sensation started to gather in your center, feeling yourself getting close to the edge. Your moans grew louder, sparks flared behind your eyes and then with an extra savory sucking sensation you were tumbling over the edge.

You screamed, pulling against your handcuffs, hips lifting off the table to meet his mouth more readily and from the way the floor and walls pulsed and pounded around you, you knew he was right.

No one could hear you.

The ecstasy washed through you, draining your remaining fight down to nothing. You didn’t even notice that he had stood up and knelt by where your head rested.

“Next time scream my name.” 

“That’s a little hard since I don’t know it.” You managed through gasps of air.

You could feel him moving beside you before you turned to come face to face with that taunting white mask. You instead focused on his eyes beneath the plastic exterior.

Every nerve ending came alive as you watched his large hands coming up and unclasping the fasten behind his mask. The cold façade fell away and you felt pin pricks of both dread and wonder overtake you.

The masked killer-unmasked.

And remarkably, if not tragically, handsome beyond your comprehension.

Those same dark eyes that gobbled up any light in the room, curtained by long strands of dark hair. Mussed from the mask, and his previous explorations of your body.

A small mole rested under one eye, well shaped nose and perfectly carved smile adorned by pink lips. His jaw was severe but softened by the rest of his features when he smiled.

It set your whole being on edge. Looking at him, the man you'd been talking to for months. Who'd been taunting you at every turn.

Who'd killed people.

"Do you prefer the mask, Detective?"

You swallowed thickly at the insinuated repercussions of having seen his face. Knowing you could pick him out of a lineup easily. You'd never be able to forget that face.

Terminally Handsome.

He smirked at you, as if reading your thoughts. Grip tightening on the knife and drawing it in lazy circles and arcs over your skin once more.

Pressing deeply just under your ribcage, a rivulet of blood being drawn to the surface as you sucked in a ragged gasp.

The pain mixed with excitement as you felt yourself dampen again just watching him.

"Let's remove this, shall we?" He nodded to your bustier that was beginning to feel very tight and hot against your body.

You felt the blade slip under the center point where it laced up corset style and watched as each ribbon gave way to the sharpened metal slicing its way upwards.

You felt like your chest could finally expand and take in oxygen once he reached forward tearing the offending fabric away from you. It even took your hazy brain to register that now you lay completely exposed to the monster before you.

Monster...or man. You couldn't decide at the moment.

The blade tip circled one nipple then the other, your body betrayed you in every sense of the word as you groaned at the cool sensation. The tight bud responding eagerly to his ministrations.

There was no mask hiding his expressions now. Amusement and darkening shadows of lust.

"I can tell you're enjoying this as much as me." He leaned in close and whispered, licking the shell of your ear. Then placing a heated kiss to your neck before working his way downard.

Taking your nipple into his hot mouth and sucking enough for your eyes to roll back and hips rise up in need. He then turned his attention to the other breast. Tongue stroking you as you felt the knife pressed to the other side keeping you in place.

"Please." You wanted to cringe away from how helpless you felt as the word escaped your lips. Not helpless asking to be let go, but helpless-begging for more.

At that the gorgeous man above you's eyes rose to catch your powerless gaze. You knew this entire time, for months, you'd never been the one in charge. It had always been him. And you fell for it- hook, line and sinker.

"Billy."

"How do I know that's not a fake name?" You ventured, crying out when his mouth tortured you again.

"Does it matter?" No. Nothing mattered at this moment. Your world had shrunk and it was just you and him. You and Billy.

"No. It doesn't." He seemed to like that. Continuing his assault on your body until you couldn't tell where your body ended and his began.

Dizzy from pleasure and wanting, no, needing more. You could feel his arousal pressed into your thigh as he hovered over you kissing and marking up your shoulder.

"Billy I-"

"Shhhhh." The cool press of the blade against your lips. "I know."

And damn him, he did. You couldn't control how your body reacted as you watched him slowly unbuckle his belt, black pants dropping to the floor around his ankles.

His pupils blown wide, moving towards you, no longer a man. A killer stalking his prey. He moved in near silence until he was hovering over you.

His lips were on yours again, demanding, controlling, guiding every movement and you followed him like a lost puppy. Biting his bottom lip before he could pull away, drawing a drop of blood to fall between you two.

He pulled back, fingers tentatively touching the small wound. The look he gave you next was feral. No humanity left in it. Only terrible delight and amusement.

You felt him pressing at your entrance, hot and hard. Your knees fell apart further and you heard him chuckle into your chest as he drove home.

It was truly criminal how good it felt, how right it felt. You were turned on and disgusted by yourself all at once, but soon that little voice telling you to hold back was drowned out by each push of his hips against yours.

You wanted to hold onto him, to run your fingers through his hair to claw at his back but all your wrists could do was press against the metal holding you back. Bruises rubbing into your skin.

He struck something deep inside you and you muffled a cry into his shoulder. Building higher and higher, soaring above you body with each movement.

You could feel him getting closer too, a shift of his hips catching just the right angle and your toes curled.

"Scream for me, Detective. Like you've been wanting to all these months."

His pace picked up, Billy groaning and the sounds of your bodies coming together again and again and again.

Your body couldn't take it anymore, fucked into oblivion. Your body clenched then released, fireworks filling your vision and spikes of pleasure drove through ever cell of your body.

"Billy!" You screamed as loud as you could, the clanging of your wrists and feet fighting their confines as your back arched into him.

At the sound of you coming again he drove in deeper than he had before and followed you over the precipice. Groaning loud as his fingers dug into your hips.

He whispered your name into your ear as he came, punctuating it with a final crush of hip hips against yours. The sound of your full name on his lips made your head hazy.

You felt a sharp prick on your side and the room around you began to swim. You could feel his fingers caressing the side of your face.

"This has been very nice Detective. I look forward to doing it again sometime." He placed a passionate kiss to your lips before giving you a soft almost tender kiss to your forehead. "Sweet Dreams." Then the room went dark.

You didn't know how long it'd been but you blinked eyes squinting at the bright light overhead. You were in a hospital, sounds of people milling about made you turn your head to the side.

"Detective!" On of your colleagues exclaimed, jumping up from her seat. " You're awake!"

"What happened?"

"We found you in the club...Tied to a table. But wearing different clothing than you'd been wearing before going inside." she gulped. "We saw the torn fragments of dress though."

So he'd been a gentleman and dressed you before leaving.

"Have you found him?" Her eyes fell to her clasped hands before shaking her head.

"No not yet but we will." Her phone beeped and she gave a baleful smile before pausing to walk out and take the call.

When you turned over onto your other side on the side table you noticed a large bouquet of flowers. A note placed in the center with a heart drawn on it.

You scrambled to open the card.

"Thank you for the amazing night, Detective. Until next time."

[sleepy-the-loz-enthusiast]

About the modern au thing, I have some ideas !

So the chain are going to be around high school/college age, with Wind and Time being exceptions as they're the oldest and youngest.

The basic premise I've thought of is these modern guys are reincarnations of all of the heroes with similar personalities. The Zeldas are here too and important, but they're all sisters and a part of the royal family. That also means that Ganondorf exists too, and maybe he can be some rich evil guy who's actions are overlooked by government figures because they're friends, and it means it's up to the Links and Zeldas to either stop him, get him out of power, or expose his actions and have people believe them. All while they help out the victims of his actions and juggle this with work or school things.

The Chain meet up through chance after receiving prophetic dreams about Ganondorf being evil and some other events. They also have dreams that go over various events in each Link's respective game. The modern chain is also born with the effects of some aspects of the original hero's journey, like I'm making Sky have chronic fatigue and be somewhat deaf, Legend with chronic pain, Time's blind in one eye, Twilight has enhanced senses and also sensory issues, Four has 4 conflicting opinions and mood swings (I'm not making him a system though, simply because I haven't done much research into it and wouldn't be able to accurately portray the condition). Some others, those are just ones I can think of right now. Wild would've also gotten into some kind of accident that's resulted in a lot of scarring and some memory loss, but he's working through it.

As for ages, these are the things I've come up with:

- Time's in his mid to late 30s and is Twilight's uncle, he works as a P.E teacher in a school

- Sky, Twilight, and Warriors are all in college, so around 17-20?? I'm gonna say that Wars and Twi are 21 but Sky is 19 (please let me know if that's inaccurate)

- Wild, Legend, and Hyrule are all in the same school year so pretty close in age. They're in the final year of high school so around 16-ish.

- Four is a year younger than them

- Wind is the youngest, he's around year 9 so 13-14

There will be other side characters as well, like Ravio (who's the same age as our favourite triple threat), Shad, Ashei, and Malon. And others! This post is mainly just saying the basic premise and some information.

Oh, and I'm queer-ing some characters. I have free will and like writing them, so if you don't like that please don't interact.

If anybody has any questions or would like to know more, feel free to ask! My ask box is always open and there are probably many issues as it's like 1am currently lmao-

But thank you for reading this far, and have a wonderful existence !!!

[bonefall]

This might be too much, but maybe you can kind of use both Mouse and Ash, by really amping up the idea there's some behind the scene meddling. Like Mouse was supposed to be the OG lawyer, but is being mysteriously held up by something (clues hinting at some characters Ashfur works with later during the next arc)

Obviously a lot of the tension is genuine, but there could be some very bad faith players deliberately trying to increase animosity since the stakes are pretty high (Especially for thistle law leaning characters who don't want Squirrel to win)

So just a few weird mishaps that get overlooked in the chaos of the trial, only being brought to light when the imposter arc happens, being kind of a stealth set up that things are about to go very, very wrong

Too little is far, far worse than too much imo. I'm a whole-pussy kind of writer. I spell suBtlety with a capital B.

I'm leaning very strongly towards Mousefur being Ashfur's first victim, done in a fit of entitled anger because he wanted to take over the trial. But I think your suggestion of mishaps should be important too, that's a very good detail

Thoughts...

The trial was paused through some accident of one of Ashfur's cohorts. Someone broke something or called for a break.

The last person to see Mousefur was a Traditionalist, leaning on the harder side.

Mouse either goes missing just before Leafpool's Trial, or midway through.

It is NOT known that Ashfur has this terrifying ability yet, though. His cohorts simply think that Mousefur is having a hard time getting back to StarClan, not knowing that Ashfur has been messing around with the boundaries between realms too.

[nanabansama]

who was talking to nene in chapter 101? The one who asked her what she thought would happen with the play because of the accident. Do we know what they were talking about yet? I thought it was tsukasa because he appears randomly in 102, but looking at the hand I'm not sure.

The hand was also drawn feminine and did not look at all like how AidaIro draws any of the boy's hands. Honestly it looked like nene's hand.

Oooh, this is a fun time to bring this up again! Your comment about the hand looking like Nene's made me think of doppelgangers. Like what happened in the recent After-school Hanako-kun chapter.

Veeery interesting... And as you say, the hand that taps Nene's shoulder is feminine. When compared to Nene's, it's not all that far off, either...

I have no doubt that the apparition here takes on the form of a girl! But even though I just brought this up myself, I have my doubts about them taking Nene's form... there just isn't much to support this idea, y'know? Nene has pretty generic girly hands. And I personally don't think the new After-School is anything more than a bit of fun. I think AidaIro wouldn't want to ruin the surprise of there being a whole other Nene in a little spin-off chapter, do you?

Some kind of Evil Yashiro would be so fun to see though!! So I wouldn't complain. ♡

Out of curiosity, I also decided to poke around the internet for some urban legends told in schools (school mysteries) and I couldn't find anything that quite matched the encounter Nene had. There were mysterious hands with no visible owner, sure, but tales involving those seem to have them coming out of swimming pools or toilets and grabbing people. But maybe I just overlooked one, who knows!

Anyway, I have no idea who they were or what they were talking about. (∀｀*ゞ) Sorry....

They're clearly talking about the play, though! It's just that what they're saying is so vague, it could mean anything. Basically, what this whole interaction is supposed to do is give us and Nene apprehension about the school play. The word "accident" just sends shivers down your spine, doesn't it!? Makes you wonder what accident happened prior, and how it concerns us in the present day...

But how does this apparition know, and when did this other accident occur? It's hard to say, but considering we haven't seen the play put on in 1968 yet, I have my suspicions it happened in that one. Not only was it also a performance of The Wizard of Oz, but our favorite local troublemaker Tsukasa Yugi had a hand in its production.

Curious, right? That Tsukasa helped prepare the play, but is content to just wait here with Amane? This isn't just Tsukasa being attached to Amane either, mind you... Amane didn't help. Amane cut class. When Tsukasa was helping his class prepare, he did not cut class with him. Maybe it doesn't mean anything, and Tsukasa was just having fun doing arts and crafts and what-not, but there's decent reason to believe that Tsukasa could have sabotaged the play somehow.

Remember, Tsukasa during this period in time has already been proven to have destructive tendencies. He wanted to destroy the Big Clock.

It's not completely out of the question!

This all still doesn't answer who the hand is, of course, but perhaps if the accident the hand is talking about is related to the 1968 production, then the hand has some relation to Tsukasa...? A former classmate, perhaps? Or maybe it's just some nobody ghost that lurked around the Closed Auditorium. Hard to say.

Anyway, that was a whole lotta talking to basically say nothing, huh? But I hope this helped get your brain juices flowing! And I really hope this apparition comes back, too. We desperately need more female characters in the cast, especially after the tragedy of Sumire-chan... (RIP...)

[gale-gentlepenguin]

Gale's Analysis: Ron Stoppable is the Epitome of Secret Badass

Ron Stoppable, The buffoon, the sidekick, the loser, the guy with a naked mole rat.

Suffice to say, Ron at first impression is just a weird teen. And for those that have made that assumption, you are right. Ron is weird. He follows the beat of his own drum. Yes he can get swayed by fads, yes he is afraid of monkeys and yes he is often losing his pants more times than a person should.

But today I will be talking to you about why this guy is not only a secret badass but the best example of one.

_________________________________________________

To be a Secret Badass.

Now there is a trope called Crouching Moron, Hidden Badass, this trope often involves an unassuming character (usually seen as a joke or weakling) and then revealing that they are actually super powerful, competent in some way shape or form.

Now I actually dont think this works for Ron because, with this trope, the individual KNOWS what they are doing is a front. That unassuming action is mainly something they put out there while the true self is the competent individual who is either Super smart, super strong, or super skilled.

But here is the thing, Ron isnt putting up a front, this is his personality. He is a bit of a slacker, doesnt follow trends, is obsessed with cartoons, goes trick or treating, gets caught up in kid stuff, everything Ron does is because he is Ron.

But thats why I think he counts as a Secret Badass, because Ron isnt Hiding the fact that he is a badass, he has NO IDEA HE IS ONE. He just performs the actions by accident or instinct without it really having it sink in.

Now to go further into what I mean. Ron thinks he is an untalented slacker idiot, a coward that struggles with girls, and a guy that cant fight or be the cool athlete.

But in truth Ron is actually a genius, athletic, smooth fighting badass.

Yes, I am being 100% serious. Ron is all of those things

Please bare with me. I can explain

______________________________________________________________

Ron the Genius

Now throughout the show Ron doesnt really make much of an effort to do his homework. usually settling for a passing grade. While Kim, his best friend and the star of the show is constantly getting A's and showing her intelligence on the regular. At first glance it is very hard to see oneself think that Ron is smart, ESPECIALLY compared to the intellect of others in the show, Like Wade, Tim and Jim,Dr.Possible (Both her parents), the super scientists they have helped or fought. But Ron is actually pretty smart.

Ron's intellect shines when he takes an interest in something. Like cooking, able to easily ace Home Economics, create the Naco (Ron received a $99 million royalty payment on the further sales of the Naco up to that point in time "Ron Millionaire" ) A testament to his cooking genius. Figure out Niche connections that Kim had overlooked.

Ron's most impressive intellectual feet was actually when he was pretending to be a genius (Naked Genius). Rufus had snuck into Drakken's brain gain helmet and became super smart. So Ron had Rufus do his home work, and the result was having people shocked by how brilliant he is. Resulting in Shego and Drakken kidnapping him to make a doomsday device. Which he actually manages to create!

And after that, he was able to complete his math homework with ease, even earning an A on the next assignment.

But for those of you who think thats a fluke. Allow me to introduce, evil ron

After getting his good swapped with Drakken's evil due to a faulty invention gone wrong at Villain con (Episode Badboy). Ron becomes a super villain. Able to create SEVERAL evil weapons of destruction. Creating schemes to COUNTER Kim's approaching his Lair and even stall Kim for long periods of time to prepare for his True evil plan. He created a plasma catapult, a weather generator, and several gadgets that helped him keep Shego in line. (He was so smart and evil he MADE SHEGO INTIMIDATED).

Ron is often inhibited by his self doubt and laziness. Often feeling that the world around him is so vast that it is not worth the effort to try, but when push comes to shove, Ron is smart enough to rival intellects that surround him. He just needs to have a bit more confidence.

_____________________________________________________________

Ron the Athlete

Ron is typically portrayed as clumsy and lacking in bravery. He tends to "trip over his own feet" in most episodes, often in comical or socially embarrassing ways, and during missions it is common for him to comically fail to do something that Kim has done flawlessly—for example, he might ski backward down a mountain and collide with a tree just after Kim has successfully navigated the slope. He also loses his pants often on missions.

But in truth, we as the viewer fail to realize how impressive Ron is. Sure he will accidentally do some insane feat in extreme sports but its seen as a fluke. But we dont actually understand how athletic Ron is until the movie "A Sitch in Time". Where Ron is half way around the world and has trouble meeting Kim for Missions. So Kim's solution, have Monique help her out. And Monique is a pretty typical teen, seems decently in shape, and strong willed. It would make sense that she could be a possible replacement.

WELL THAT IMMEDIATELY BACK FIRES. Its revealed that Monique is WAY OUT of her depth, she comments that maybe after 10 years of training would she be ready to take on another mission like this. Which really puts into perspective how impressive it is that Ron is able to keep up with Kim in most situations. Ignoring the comedic relief.

But another clear example of his athleticism is his ability to run. While initially using a super suit to make the football team and become the QB, (in season 4). Ron eventually lost the suit and had to play the game with his own skill, and he won the game by Running so much he out ran everyone on the opposite team to the point of exhaustion and scored a touch down. Becoming the team’s Running back instead. While played for laughs as this was because he is so used to running for his life, it is still should be noted that he ran fast, and dealt with very athletic individuals.

He also is shown to have incredible reflexes, avoiding traps and danger through dance and rather amazing feats of physical prowess. (And this is without mystical monkey power)

There is more to it but Ron is a surprisingly good athlete, and probably one of the few people that could keep up with Kim. Making him such a reliable side kick.

______________________________________________________________

Ron the Smooth Player

SMOOTH RON STOPPABLE

But in all seriousness, Ron's luck with girls is actually not that bad. He had girls take interest in him through out the series. His first crush being Amelia (an attractive upper classman that developed a thing for him when he got a new haircut “The New Ron”. And flirted with her with some success in "Ron Millionaire"

Then there was Tara, a Cheerleader that showed Ron interest for sometime. Such as in "Sink or Swim" when the cheersquad was trapped in Camp Wanaweep

Even using terms he used at times. like "Badical"

Though Ron never did catch on that She was into him and she ended up dating Josh who was Kim's former lover interest.

Next there was Zita Flores

The ticket girl at the theater Kim and Ron often went to. And was Ron's love interest for most of season 2. Ron managed to win her over and even dated her for a bit, tried to impress her by playing a game that she and her friends played. But unfortunately it sort of fizzled because they both didnt really agree on what was considered a date.

And next up we have Yori

(I had a crush on Yori as a kid, so I am including her image solely for that)

Meeting Ron when he was part of the student exchange program, for the Yamanouchi Ninja School. n the episode "Exchange", Ron shows repeated interest in Yori. He was having trouble fitting in yet she was kind and helped him out every step of the way. Ron proves himself when he helps save the school and Yori believes in his abilities. Though Ron like with other girls failed to see that Yori "Liked him liked him" until their second meeting.

Though the third time they met Ron and Kim were and Item and Yori was cool with it. Which is nice to see they are gone good terms

Bonnie was on the list but it wasnt because of liking Ron it was more about liking either his Money (Ron Millionaire) or His popularity in "Homecoming Upset"

But interestingly most of these relationships, Ron is not trying to be someone he isnt (except Bonnie). And he is winning these girls over. Showing he has some sort of charisma. But for main proof, lets look at the main Relationship we are here for, his one with Kim.

This right here is proof that the boy has some sort of charm. Sure they had been friends for years and it had been slowly building up to the point when they FINALLY admit it. Sure the guy that Kim Fell for in So the Drama was basically just a calmer and more Confident version of Ron but actually an evil robot.

But the beauty is the relationship itself. Ron goes to such lengths to show Kim how much he cares and is willing to do anything for her. Fearing she would dump him because its senior year and Cheerleaders only date jocks/Popular stars. Boy joins the football team. Kim wants to go on more romantic dates, boy gets a job to pay for it. Ron also shows to be encouraging and while a bit of a worrywart is great for Kim.

So in conclusion Ron can be smooth... in his nerdy true to himself way

____________________________________________________________

Ron the Fighter

So did I mention he has mystical monkey power?

During the Season 1 episode "Monkey Fist Strikes", Ron was exposed to ancient magical energy from four jade monkey statues which imbued him with "Mystical Monkey Powers", including an instinctive knowledge of the martial art of "Tai Sheng Pek Kwar" (大圣劈挂, translates to "The big saint divides hangs") as well as superhuman speed and strength. Though after the episode its believed to have been lost.

Until the Episode "Exchange" in which has him at the Ninja school. He gets some training. Allowing him to learn how to fight better. Even letting him tap into the martial art he thought he lost access to. He was able to wield the Lotus Blade and Beat Fukushima (a talented student and traitor of the school)

Ron may not always fight in the show but when he does, he unveils his true ability. One example is during the Movie a sitch in time. When he found out Shego had basically ruined Bueno Nacho and seperated Kim and Him by sending him to norway. In his rage he flipped an incredibly buff and genetically enhanced Drakken with one move and destroyed the Time monkey, thus saving the world.

Ron also showed that when turned evil he is actually a very vicious fighter (his reluctance and more timid nature removed) he easily bested well over 30 super hero clones in seconds, and was agile enough to out match a super strong Hego.

Ron in the finale "Graduation" shows his greatest feats of fighting, besting the super strong alien invaders (see picture above), then proceeding to go super saiyan blue.

And he threw the two aliens into orbit into their crashing space ship presumably ending them. (I am not kidding its right here)

Ron is an absolute fighting badass, only held back by his self esteem. But at this point, I think he really is unstoppable

___________________________________________________________

Ron the Secret Badass

All that aside, sure there is the monkey kung fu, the bouts of brilliance or even the impressive game. Ron was basically a normal guy flung into a world of crazy super powerful people and because he wanted to keep close to his best friend managed to climb insurmountable odds and become someone spectacular.

Ron may not think much of his abilities but he really is Unstoppable

[criticallyobs]

Hi you two ☺️ I just wanted to drop by and tell you I'm currently making my way through your podcast episodes of last twilight (in a bit of reverse order because I stumbled over your ep9 discussion and I was really enjoying it so now im on your second episode) aaanyway. I thought since I've spend most of my afternoon and evening listening to you I had to tell you how much I enjoy your discussions about the show.

I find myself slowly losing my mind over both Mork and day and last twilight in general and im so glad I found you two just picking everything apart and pointing out parallels and potential foreshadowing and urgh. That's exactly what my spiraling brain needs 🤣🤣👌

(Also I'm kinda avoiding the tag on here especially after the last episode because a lot of the day/night takes in there make me uncomfortable but everything you two said about days reaction and the accident to the blame and guilt and intentions was exactly what I thought)

So now imma make myself a cup of tea and listen to the other podcasts episodes until I've caught up and then I hope episode 10 is out and your discussion along with it.

I'm really looking forward to more, have a wonderful evening!!!!

We are in love with this message. Thank you for giving us a chance and taking the time to message us.

Firstly, welcome to our insanity, we hope you enjoy your stay with us.

Secondly, feel free to comment or send us messages/questions whenever you have the urger we really do love it.

I wanted to write a witty, sweet response because this just made our day but I honestly don't know what to say other than thank you.

We love hearing about people's journeys on how they found us, we're still pretty new at this and we are kind of stumbling around in the dark trying to see what works best.

Honestly, when we started we thought it might be a little bit of fun but we didn't expect people to not only listen to us but enjoy it and even join us on new adventures with new shows.

I realized today we have done a total of 40 podcast episodes so far spanning three shows and it has been so much fun. M and I have discussed how we've even noticed how it has enhanced our viewing not only sharing the experience with each other but you guys too but also we are noticing more and appreciating all of the hard work everyone is putting into these shows.

Some interesting ideas definitely get overlooked sometimes when we watch things casually but we are learning how exciting it is to see deeper than just the surface and it's very flattering when a theory or a random thought we have turns out to have been done intentionally by the actors/director etc.

We have some ideas for the podcast for what will hopefully be a fun 2024 and we hope you'll stay around and spend some time with us even when Last Twilight is finished (*Insert crying emoji HERE).

One of the things we are hoping to achieve with our podcast is meeting great people but also introducing those great people to amazing shows, books, and anything else we discover and think deserves more love.

So far we've dedicated our podcast to three shows: Dangerous Romance, Last Twilight, and Cooking Crush. These are three very different shows but they have one thing in common they are giving us something to talk about, making us laugh and cry and bond and grow and that is amazing, right?

Thank you for being a part of that with us.

Thank you to all our listeners, we hope that 2024 will be one filled with us making you laugh and cry and grow with us.

Love Z and M

[captainjonnitkessler]

hey you're the only person whose atheism takes i actually like AND you share some fandoms with me so i wanna ask how you'd approach this cause i'm short on ideas

i'm a big fan of fantasy gods and religion (zelda, final fantasy, dnd, etc) but it always boils down to "The Gods are de facto real and good so we worship them" or "There are some Good and some Evil Gods" but I'm kinda religious-traumatized so every time I try to work with the setting (and don't get me wrong, I like it as fantasy worldbuilding!) I accidently don't know where to go except angst and cult-stuff

but I was wondering if you had some other ideas for an antitheist depicting fantasy gods that doesn't feel like opening old scars or staring into the abyss, or if you know any resources i can look at

I love this ask, religion in fantasy is something that does fascinate me! Because as you say, a lot of works have a pretty generic "these are the Good gods the good guys worship and these are the Bad gods that the bad guys worship", which is, y'know. Honestly fine, if religion isn't a big theme in the work, but is also overlooking a ton of potential.

I think in something like dnd, where the gods are demonstrably real and there's little to no argument about who they are and what they want, the debate shifts from "is this true?" to "this is true, but why should I care?" Do people think gods are inherently worthy of worship, or do they expect to get something in return? What do the gods have to offer their worshipers? What do they demand in return, and why? In what way does worshiping or not worshiping a god impact your average peasant's day to day life? What would draw someone to one god over another? Dnd gods usually aren't all-powerful, so in what ways are they limited and how do they deal with that? Are the gods trying to achieve some sort of goal, and if so why? If your protagonist is worshiping someone, is it important to them or is it something they just do out of habit/family tradition?

I'm also a fan of the Terry Pratchett method of "the gods are real and are mostly minor annoyances". I mean sure, they're there, but you don't go around believing in them, because it would be like believing in a table. I think this is a funny option when you want to keep the gods around as part of the setting, but don't really want to do any religious narrative stuff. (Although as Pterry proves in Small Gods, you can also use this setup for a very powerful narrative if you so choose.)

And for my own part, I mostly ignore religion when I'm writing for the same reason I ignore romance: I simply don't care about it and don't want to write about it so I pretend it doesn't exist. My world now baby!!

As far as resources go - I haven't listened to much of the Writing Excuses podcast so I can't guarantee quality, but they do have a few episodes focusing on writing different types of religion in fantasy that might be worth checking out.

Anyway I'm opening this up to the floor because I would genuinely love to hear other people's takes on this. There's SO much potential for fantasy religious worldbuilding that I think gets overlooked in favor of "good vs evil pantheon" or "catholic church with the serial number filed off".