#but they did have a relationship with the Dwarves too

[fizzyxcustard]

Those Hands.

Masterlist of fan fiction

Fandom: The Hobbit

Pairings: Thorin Oakenshield x Fem!Reader

Warnings: Insecurity, comparison, angst, sexual references, mutual pining, idiots in love.

Comments/Notes: From the imagine, "Imagine that Thorin is in love with you (from the race of Men) but constantly compares his body and features with other men, thinking you find him disgusting." Requested by multiple readers and anons. (THANK YOU!)

I hope you like the fic. As always, like, reblog and comment if you enjoy. If you wish to be added to any of my tag lists, let me know.

Thorin watched every little interaction that you had with other males, whether they be Dwarves, Men or Elves. He couldn’t help but watch you blush, avert eye contact and use self-soothing gestures, such as touching your face, curling your hair with your fingers, or rubbing your upper arms. 

Since Thorin had been crowned King of Erebor, and re-building was underway, many people visited the mountain. Bard came from Esgaroth, often meeting with Thorin in council, to discuss trade deals and assistance in building. Much to Thorin’s distain, Thranduil of the Woodland Realm, also came. Again, he joined the council to converse around the subject of trade deals in precious metals and gemstones.  

Your relationship with Thorin was entirely built on trust. The two of you had been companions out on the road during the quest to re-take Erebor. He had always valued your opinion, spoke with you in private, and kept you close to him on his council of advisors. Erebor was now your home, despite you being of the race of Men. Your family were all gone, meaning that the Dwarves had now taken that place, welcoming you into the fold and treating you as one of their own. 

One morning, council was busy. Neldra, one of the kitchen staff, was on hand with jugs of cold drinks and pots of tea. Then once all the drinks were laid out neatly on intricately laced doilies, she came back with a trolley of fresh pastries. 

The smell was divine; you took an inhale and let the scent overtake you. Apple and cinnamon were among the selection: your favourite. 

You reached out to take one of the pastries, only to feel another hand graze yours. “I apologise,” a voice came, from the direction of the hand. 

It was Bard, from two seats down to your right hand side, who had stretched across to grab one of Neldra’s famous delicacies. “It was no bother,” you replied. “You first.” 

“Ladies first. I insist.” 

Thorin’s blue eyes studied the scene going on before him. No one else had noticed the exchange between you and Bard. Upon the impact of yours and Bard’s hands, Thorin felt a jolt in his chest. It rose up into his throat, and he closed his eyes for a brief second. The red hot sensation bore into him, feeling as if it were forming a hole straight through him. Upon opening his eyes, Thorin looked at his hands, then glanced across to Bard’s. The man’s hands were broad, but his fingers long and slender. Very much unlike Thorin’s. The Dwarf King’s fingers were short and bulky, with stubby ends. Surely Bard’s hands would have the dexterity and skill to caress your skin, drawing shivers from you. A Dwarf’s hands would be too calloused and thick to evoke any kind of pleasurable sensation upon a woman from the race of Men. 

Chatter continued, along with eating and drinking. In that time, Thorin tried his hardest to push the negative thoughts from his mind, and concentrate on the conversation at hand, which involved the realms of Erebor and Esgaroth exchanging skilled workers and apprentices. 

Thranduil was also present and merely rolled his eyes as the conversation got underway between Bard and Thorin. The Elven King did not like to waste his time, and being in this council meant that there were stints of time where his input was not needed. 

“Would you like another drink?” you asked Thranduil, picking up the nearest china pot of tea. 

“I would much prefer wine, but since I’m not within my realm, I would not say no.”

Thorin’s gaze darted over to Thranduil, and then to you. He saw you brush a piece of hair behind your ear, and then look up at the Elven King sat opposite you. Your ears were small, with one golden hoop earring in each lobe. Then Thorin looked at Thranduil’s ears; pointed at the tip, finely structured. They weren’t big, round and sticking out. Thorin’s ears were ugly, and thankfully he could keep them hidden under his long hair. Secretly, he had always imagined you whispering against them, your lips brushing them. It made Thorin shiver. 

Once council had concluded, Thorin left the chamber and headed back to the royal wing. Once inside and he stood in front of his full length dress mirror, staring at the protruding ears on the side of his head. Then he studied his large hands, thinking back to Bard’s. 

The males from the races of Men and Elves made you blush in a way that Thorin never had. Their bodies were more finely crafted, which complemented yours. They had finer features with smaller noses and brows. 

Thorin shifted back and sat on his bed, his hands in his lap. He took one more glance at them, feeling disgusted at what he saw. They would never be good enough for you. None of his body would ever be good enough for you. Everything about him was oversized, not delicate and handsome like Bard and Thranduil. Both of them had lost their wives, and may have wished to re-marry, so they would make better husbands for you. 

***

The following day and Thorin was sat in the council room, signing documents. His quill scratched loudly against the parchment. 

You walked in, holding a further stack of documents in your hands. “These should be the last ones,” you said, offering a smile. 

Thorin looked up at you. No blush on your face to be seen. 

“Is everything alright?” you asked. There was something in his eyes, a thoughtfulness. Maybe even a sadness. You sat down in an empty seat next to Thorin. “What’s wrong?” On impulse, you placed your hand on top of his. 

Thorin looked at your hands, watching your thumb gently caress his knuckle. How huge his hand looked against yours. But how right it felt, as if the size did not matter, and they were still able to fit together as one. 

“There is nothing wrong,” Thorin said, forcing a weak smile. “I hear that Bard is leaving this afternoon. Will you not be wishing him farewell?” 

“I barely know him,” you replied. “I’d feel it strange to do so.” 

“Would you wish to get to know him?” 

“I don’t know. Why do you ask?”

“Surely you find him handsome,” Thorin continued, pulling the new stack of documents over towards him. 

“Not really. Can’t say I do. There’s some reason to you asking this, Thorin.” 

“Why would I have any reason?” 

“There’s always a reason to anything that you ask. I know you enough by now. Talk to me. You’ve always given me more trust than I deserve, and never questioned me liked this before.” 

Thorin took a deep inhale and looked at you, dropping his quill. “Who do you find handsome? If not Bard, maybe Thranduil?” 

You couldn’t help but laugh. “Why ever would you think I’m attracted to King Thranduil?” The whole idea was so comical that you couldn’t help but keep giggling. “It takes….” You couldn’t stop the giggling. “A special….kind of woman….to…..” 

Thorin also began to chuckle, watching your face turn red in amusement and delight. His heart somehow felt lighter as he watched you, and that overwhelming love for you rose. It was a love that would allow him to do anything to make you happy. It was a love that would make him sacrifice his very life to keep you safe. It was sacrificial and unconditional. 

You could see the glow in Thorin’s eyes and the smile which curled his lips upwards. He was the one you found handsome, above all others. The intensity in his eyes made butterflies swarm in your stomach. His proud presence caused you to shiver whenever he entered a room. His voice was enough to make your imaginations travel to another place where only the two of you were, locked away in comfort, pursuing wondrous pleasure. 

You edged closer to Thorin. “You said you want to know who I find handsome?” 

Thorin’s heart was hammering now and he was sure that you would be able to hear it. 

“It’s you.” Your voice was a whisper. “It’s always been you. How could it not be you? Why would you ever think I’d be attracted to Bard and Thranduil?” 

Thorin closed his eyes in embarrassment. “My features and body are not like theirs.” 

“So why would that not make you handsome?” 

“My hands…” 

“Your hands?” you giggled. This time a blush did hit your cheeks, and it was even more vivid than it had ever been when in the company of any other man. “You have found out my secret.” 

“What secret?” Thorin asked, shifting ever so slightly closer to you. He had never wanted you any more than he did in those moments. The very thought that it was him that you found handsome was making his whole being rise, but anticipation was now racing down his spine in shivers. 

“I have had a fantasy for some time now, since meeting you, of what you could do to me with those hands,” you said, biting your lip. 

Thorin couldn’t hold back any more and moved even closer to you, his hand cupping your cheek. His breath was elevated and his eyes were sparkling with so much joy, but slight fear. 

His lips crashed against yours and you both groaned upon impact. Within seconds and the kiss had grown deep, your tongues both meeting. You couldn’t help but whimper as Thorin’s lips left yours and trailed down your neck. His beard tickled your skin and then as he grew more impatient, you could feel the tickle become a bristling, sharp sensation. Your hands became lost in his hair as he nuzzled at your neck, groaning and grunting. 

Thorin felt your fingertips brush over his ears, and it drew an overwhelming shiver from his very core. 

“I love you, Thorin,” you said again. “Now show me what you can do with those hands.” 

***

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Thorin Oakenshield tag list: @braidedheart @dumbassunderthemountain

Middle-earth tag list: @mismaeve @sotwk @emmyspov @valkyrie-of-the-light @deadlymistletoe

The Hobbit tag list: @flowerniche

[tolkienocweek]

Tolkien OC Week

A fandom event for OCs and underdeveloped characters in Tolkien's world!

This event celebrates both characters of Tolkien's world and our own characters that need more love, by creating and reblogging all kind of fanworks, like fanfiction, fanart, fanvideos, fancrafts, headcanons, playlists, edits, moodboards etc.

The event is modded by @yellow-faerie, @elamarth-calmagol and @stormxpadme and will take place between 25th August - 31st August 2024 for the fourth year running.

NSFW text entries are allowed and we’ll tag them accordingly when we reblog them, but please put them behind a “read more”.

We'll also be tracking the tag #tolkienocweek during this week!

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Event schedule for 2024:

Day 1 (25th August): World Building

Create a fanwork about an original character, and use them as a jumping off point for worldbuilding. Share a dwarf from the far side of Rhun, consider the existence of an Aina before the creation of Arda, explore Rivendell from the point of view of an outsider, or tell us about the underground punk subculture of Gondolin.

Day 2 (26th August): Canon-OC Relationships

This year, it’s not just about romance. Today, explore a relationship between your OC and a canon character. Your character could be a lover or spouse of someone canonical, lf course, but they could also be a friend, sibling, teacher, servant, fan, or even rival!

Day 3 (27th August): Alternate Universes

Share an OC who isn’t canon compliant at all. Maybe you want to add a fourteenth member of Thorin’s company or give a reborn Celebrimbor children with a surviving and reformed Sauron. Or, maybe you want to do a crossover with your Star Wars OC or let your self-insert narrate a coffee shop AU. Go wild!

Day 4 (28th August): Gaps and Ghosts

Create a fanwork based upon a character that Tolkien either thought up and abandoned, such as Odo Took oe the characters of The New Shadow. Or, create someone he missed creating in the first place, like… um… just about anyone’s mother.

Day 5 (29th August): Non-Humanoid Characters

Middle Earth isn't just elves, Men, hobbits, and dwarves. Today, share a character who is something different entirely: an animal, a dragon, a Maia who doesn't take humanoid form, an ent or huron, or a creature of your own invention.

Day 6 (30th August): Background Characters

This prompt is all about people who are in the background of the action: the low-ranking soldiers, the servants, and the ordinary people living in extraordinary times. Or maybe you want someone who isn't so ordinary, like an advisor in the Council of Elrond who never made it onto the page, or one of the Maiar who sank the Feanorians on the stolen boats. Show us their view of the action!

Day 7 (31st August): Freeform

Did we miss something? Do you have an OC that doesn’t fit into any day, or did you want to do a second fanwork for one of the days? Today, create and share whatever you want, as long as it has to do with original or abandoned characters!

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Since we want to celebrate creations about neglected characters all year long, the mods will occasionally reblog posts and fancreations about OCs and underdeveloped characters. If you would like to see your post on our blog, you're very welcome to tag tolkienocweek. Since tumblr's tagging system is often being faulty, don't hesitate to message us, too!

We are looking forward to see and share all the awesome work you come up with!

[vigilskeep]

Who is the Kristjanson guy you don't want to write a companion? Did he fuck up a past companion? I'm new to DA and don't really know anything about the writers or anything that goes on behind the scenes.

lukas kristjanson. he’s been a part of the series from the beginning and i’m not saying he’s never contributed good stuff! he wrote quests i love, like dao’s a paragon of her kind and dai’s in your heart shall burn. but he has a very questionable history writing wlw. he wrote sera, whose romance and writing have their, uh, issues and controversies. he wrote the leliana’s song dlc which heavily features leliana/marjolaine, and presumably wrote branka/hespith if he wrote a paragon of her kind, which are probably less glaring when taken on their own but together are two major contributions to dragon age’s weird pattern of all canon wlw relationships being super toxic for some reason. on top of that, and i don’t know anything about this really bc i don’t go here, but i hear bad things about his writing of black characters in mass effect

so i’ve been pretty concerned (and i’m not the only one) ever since a black man and two wlw became the last companions we didn’t know the writers for. it’s just harding left, which unfortunately i feel would make sense for kristjanson, who has historically written dwarf-y content, fereldans, and inquisition archers... but afaik we also still have sheryl chee unspoken for, another veteran who has been writing major characters and quests since origins (leliana, wynne, oghren, dog, sigrun, velanna, isabela, blackwall). she’s written dwarves too, and wrote the mage origin and circle quests in dao, so you’d think this is the person to go to for a dwarf that suddenly has magical abilities, right? she is also still at bioware while kristjanson was among those laid off, though that doesn’t necessarily mean anything either way

[brainrotbabe24]

Can you write something about Reader x Fili when Readers human friend braids their hair in a platonic way but the dwarves, due to their traditions, assume its romantic and Fili is like really sad cause he wanted to ask reader to court?? ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

Hi! Thank you for your request! Fili is one of my favorites, so I had a lot of fun writing this one. 💖🎉

The Misread Braid: Part 1

Rating:fluff/angst/ sfw

Relationship: filixreader

Author note: For some reason, I keep getting errors when I try to post the whole thing, so I will have to split it into two posts

It had been a year since Erebor was reclaimed. The dwarves were slowly returning, the city was being rebuilt, and everyone's spirits were high—especially Fili's. He had fallen head over heels for you. The flirting, the lingering glances, and the late-night strolls made it clear to everyone that a royal wedding might be on the horizon. The feelings between you two were undeniable, and everyone, including you, could see it.

You even wrote to your friend from home, inviting them to visit for a month. You had a feeling Fili might soon ask to court you, and you wanted your friend's help to look your best. Erebor didn't have the amenities you were used to, so you asked your friend to bring as much as possible. You even asked them to bring a lovespoon, a courting tradition for your hometown. You weren't familiar with Dwarven courting rituals but were excited to see what Fili would do.

—------------

One day, Fili was out handling his daily duties when he spotted you standing on the ramparts overlooking Dale.

"Y/N?" he called out, a smile spreading across his face.

You turned and saw him. "Fili!" you exclaimed, running over to hug him.

You stayed in each other's embrace for a while. "What are you doing out here?" he asked, his arms lingering on yours. "It's freezing."

"I was just too excited," you replied. "My friend is coming to visit."

"That's right, they're coming today, aren't they?" he asked 

"Yes!" you squealed with excitement. "Oh, I'm so excited for you to meet them!

Fili chuckled. "I'm excited to meet them, too! I have a meeting with Thorin today, but find me later, and we can all have dinner together."

"Sounds perfect!" you agreed.

Fili smiled and waved goodbye, his heart light and his smile wide. He was planning to court you later that week and was on his way to talk to Thorin about it. Everything was going to be perfect! 

—------------

Later that evening, everyone gathered to meet your friend at the tavern. The air was filled with laughter and lively conversation as Fili walked in, eager to make a good impression.

"Fili, over here!" you called, waving him over.

Fili walked over and hugged you. "This is my friend," you said, introducing them.

"Nice to meet you," Fili said, shaking their hand. 

"So this is Fili," your friend said, elbowing you playfully. "What a dream boat, Y/N?"

"Stop it!" you giggled, playfully hitting their arm.

Fili was confused. "Dreamboat?" he thought.

"Come on, let's get some beer," you said, leaning on Fili's arm. You walked to the table, where everyone was still bombarding your friend with questions.

"Tell me," Dwalin asked, "how was the journey? Long?"

"Not too long, about four months—it would've been sooner, but it started to snow," your friend replied.

"Snow!" Bilbo exclaimed.

"Where are you staying?" Kili asked.

"With Y/N," your friend responded.

Fili started feeling a twinge of jealousy and confusion. He didn't know your friend was staying with you? He tried to dismiss his growing discomfort. "Calm down, Fili," he told himself. “It's just Y/N being nice to a friend, nothing more." He took a swig of his beer and forced a smile.

But as the evening went on, there were more moments when Fili could not shake the jealous feeling. Your friend bought you beer, touched your arm, and you even danced with them. Fili was all mixed up and even agreed to take you two to the Dale the next day! “How did that happen?” He thought. Maybe he was overreacting. There was no reason to be worked up; he just met them. But FIli's thoughts were interrupted.

"That dress really commands attention," your friend said. They leaned into you and touched your tunic. You wrapped your arms around them and laughed, blushing a little. 

Fili choked on his drink.  He didn't think the night could get worse. He felt horrible and wanted to just leave. Getting up, he went to the bar to close his tab. Kili and Bilbo were there getting more drinks for the table. 

"Leaving so soon?" Bilbo asked

"Yeah," Fili said shortly

"Why?" Kili asked. "It's not even that late."

Fili shrugged.

"Come on, stay a little longer. I bet y/n would want you to walk them home." Kili said.

"They have their friend, remember" Fili scoffed. 

"They're just friends; I wouldn't worry about it. Plus, Y/N told me they invited them for a special reason." Kili laughed

"Maybe y/n thinks something is going to happen… a royal courtship perhaps" Bilbo winked

Fili looked back at the table. Maybe he could stay. Fili had a feeling you knew he was going to ask. He smiled and shook his head. He was being silly. He was about to say something when he saw your friend lean down, whispering in your ear. You nodded, a blush rising to your cheeks.

"Why did Y/N nod?" Fili muttered, a mix of confusion and jealousy creeping in.

"Are you sure it was a nod?" Kili asked.

"Maybe they are agreeing to something…like another dance," Bilbo suggested, adding to Fili's anxiety.

Your friend then stood up and moved behind you, lazily undoing your bun and letting your hair fall down your back. They picked up a strand and started to braid it.

Bilbo and Kili glanced at Fili, whose face had turned a deep crimson red. Throwing down some money, Fili stammered, "I-I can't watch this anymore," and made a beeline for the door.

"Oh shit," Kili muttered under his breath, realizing the situation.

Still trying to stay positive, Bilbo leaned in and whispered, "It might not have been a braid, right? Maybe it's just a... fancy knot?"

—------------

Consumed with the company of your friends, you stayed out until the wee hours of the morning, laughing and sharing stories. It wasn't until you woke up the next day that you remembered not seeing Fili after he abruptly left the table.

Concerned, you quickly got dressed and decided to go looking for him. Making your way through the busy halls of Erebor, your eyes scanned the faces, hoping to catch a glimpse of him.

You checked the usual spots—the training grounds, the forge, even the quiet corner of the library—but there was no sign of Fili. Growing more anxious, you asked a few dwarves if they had seen him, but they only shook their heads.

Finally, after what felt like hours of searching, you headed toward the ramparts, hoping to find him there. As you approached, you spotted a familiar figure standing alone, his back turned to you, shoulders tense. It was Fili.

"Fili," you said with a sigh of relief, "I've been looking for you everywhere."

Fili didn't look at you. 

"You left last night without saying goodbye. What was that about?"

He opened his mouth to speak but couldn't find the words—his heart ached as he noticed you still had the braid in.

"Fili," you said, concerned.

"Sorry, Y/N, I'm super busy. I can't talk right now," he said, clearing his throat.

"But we're supposed to go to Dale today."

"Plans changed," he said quickly 

"What does that mean?"

He looked up at you, his eyes red and puffy.

"Are you—?" you trailed off, unsure.

"I gotta go, Y/N," he said, brushing past you, wiping a tear from his face.

----

Part 2:

[middle-earth-mythopoeia]

No, Amazon’s Rings of Power is not “woke”

It annoys me so much when people complain about Rings of Power being “woke.” First of all, because of the way they overuse the word, woke has become a next-to-meaningless term that can be applied to anything conservatives don’t like. Second, Rings of Power is only progressive in the most surface-level way; underneath that it is in fact extremely regressive. People who whine about Rings of Power being woke are not only annoying, they’re also just plain wrong.

Ever since the casting was announced, right-wing idiots have been shrieking about Black actors being cast in Rings of Power. These trolls have made all kinds of dumb statements about how Middle-earth = Europe, but they seem willfully ignorant of the fact that Europe has never been exclusively white, and there is no reason to exclude people of color from the cast of any Tolkien adaptation. Still, this didn’t make the show progressive in its casting (which was tokenistic) or its writing (which ranges from bad to horrible).

For instance, the only storyline Amazon writers could apparently think of to introduce Arondir was literally him being enslaved. I mean, really? Is that really the best plotline to go with? To be clear, I’m not criticizing the actor, I’m criticizing the writing. In addition, Amazon cast actors of color overwhelmingly in parts invented for the show—rather than as actual Tolkien characters—which more easily allows them to be sidelined by the narrative, and the casting overall was in no way diverse enough. So I find it bizarre that people criticize the show for its so-called wokeness, when very little effort was made from a diversity and inclusion standpoint.

Right-wing nutjobs also threw a fit about Amazon portraying Galadriel as a warrior, to the point where they started calling her “Guyladriel.” They whined about Galadriel being too feminist and too masculine in the show, but that’s the opposite of what happened and betrays a fundamental misunderstanding of Galadriel as a character. First of all, she fought at Alqualondë in one version of the story, so no one should have a problem with her wielding a sword. What IS a problem is everything else about her portrayal.

Amazon’s writers took one of Tolkien’s most interesting characters and stripped her of her power, her authority, her gravitas, her wisdom, and her ambition. They had Gil-galad, her younger cousin, order her around. They had Elendil compare her to his children, even though she’s older than the sun and moon. And they made her a petty, naïve, incompetent brat whose entire first season involves being manipulated by Sauron, and as if that wasn’t bad enough, having a bizarre will-they-won’t-they relationship with him. In addition, Galadriel is canonically tall and strong, and one of her names means “man-maiden,” but they made her short and waif-like instead.

Galadriel in Amazon’s show doesn’t even resemble the character Tolkien wrote—the character named Nerwen, who never trusted Annatar, who certainly never had some creepy Reylo thing with him, who was powerful and wise and authoritative, who had a marvelous gift of insight into the minds of others—not a quippy, rude, annoying idiot who is constantly being controlled by the men around her. I don’t know why anyone would look at Rings of Power and think this portrayal is progressive. It’s actually a failure of imagination: Amazon’s writers literally cannot conceive of a powerful woman even when all of the work of imagining her has been done for them.

In addition to the faux-feminist-and-actually-sexist portrayal of Galadriel, Rings of Power is also on the whole weirdly regressive from the standpoint of gender roles and gender expression. Tolkien’s Elves are canonically tall, beautiful, and long-haired, regardless of gender. Tolkien’s Dwarves all have beards. So what did Amazon do? They gave most of their male Elves short hair, while the female Elves still have long hair, and they did away with female Dwarves’ beards. They patted themselves on the back for “letting” Galadriel fight, but don’t show other female warriors—in battle scenes, for instance, why are all the soldiers male? In general, they made their characters adhere to conservative gender roles and gender expression, which is especially glaring because it contradicts what Tolkien actually wrote.

On top of all this, they decided to throw in some anti-Irish stereotypes with a side of classism, just for fun. They had the ragged, dirty, primitive Harfoots speaking in Irish accents, while the regal, ethereal, advanced Elves speak with English accents. None of the actors playing the Harfoots are Irish themselves, to my knowledge, which makes the choice to have them speak this way especially questionable. Seriously, who thought this was a good idea?

All in all, it makes absolutely no fucking sense to criticize Rings of Power for being woke. It may look progressive on the surface because there’s a Black Elf and a woman with a sword, but that’s as far as it goes. The show isn’t particularly diverse to begin with, and it treats its characters of color poorly. Galadriel’s portrayal is disgustingly regressive, as is the show’s overarching take on gender. This is to say nothing of the caliber of the writing in general, which is unsurprisingly low. There is so much to criticize—like the nonsense about mithril, or the fact that Celebrimbor of all people doesn’t understand alloys, or the fact that you can apparently swim across the Sundering Seas now—which makes complaining about the show’s supposed wokeness especially irrational.

I also have to wonder if the people still whining about wokeness know anything about Tolkien’s works. Do they know that the crown of Gondor was based on the crown of the Pharaohs of Egypt? Do they know that Tolkien considered Byzantium the basis for Minas Tirith? Do they know that female warriors already exist in Tolkien’s books? Do they know when they rant about how much they hate “Guyladriel” that Amazon’s portrayal is actually too feminine? Ultimately, people who complain about wokeness in Rings of Power—or any Tolkien adaptation—are just betraying their own idiocy. I honestly think if Tolkien’s books were published now conservatives would scream that they’re woke too.

[stilltrails]

I always like the headcanons that Kili and Fili's father was either of low-class or they are illegitimate, which caused some sort of scandal because I believe that Thorin would be Dis's biggest champion in this scenario.

Not just because he loves his sister dearly, but because at the time, romantic prospects and political alliances weren't looking that great for him either. He was coming to terms with the fact that he's not attracted to dwarves, which to him is an entire identity crisis. He's non-traditional himself, keeps his beard short, and has started realizing he like's clean shaven people.

And asking a dwarf to shave their beard under any circumstances is not acceptable.

But Dis has children? Legitimate, royal, or not, they're HIS heirs now. Like he's sorry for the scandal his nephew's caused, but it's also the answer to his prayers. He needs them to ascend the throne and be in his line, because he cannot turn down another suitor without his father suspecting something is off with him.

Plus he makes their other parent nobility, so problem solved.

No need to marry and produce heirs when Dis did it for him.

Thrain is just frustrated with all of his children, but is glad they've come up with a solution.

And of course years later, when Dis sees Bilbo decked out in consort garbs, she understands part of Thorin's reason for having Kili and Fili as his heirs, because Thrain would never approve of Thorin's relationship with Bilbo.

(Frerin is also GLAD because people were looking to him to produce an heir too, and he unfortunately loves rocks more than he does dwarves)

[hanniebanggi]

𝐫𝐡𝐲𝐭𝐡𝐦 𝐨𝐟 𝐮𝐬 • 𝐥𝐞𝐞 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐧

genre: fluff, enemies to lovers, established relationship

warnings: y/n is she/her, some profanities.

Chan leaned against the doorway of their cozy apartment kitchen, watching Y/N move around with practiced ease as she prepared dinner. The sight was familiar yet surreal, considering where they had started. 

In high school, they were fierce rivals, constantly competing against each other in dance competitions. Chan had always admired Y/N's skill and determination, but he never let that admiration soften his competitive edge. Y/N was his rival—someone he needed to surpass.

"Just because you won right now, does not mean I'm bad at dancing." Y/N said while holding the silver trophy with number two carved on it.

"Just admit it, kid. I'm better than you'll ever be." Chan said with smirk on his face, waving his gold trophy in front of Y/N.

"Well that's because I just started a year ago, little dumbass. And who are you calling kid? I'm literally taller than you. Bet you learned dancing from the dwarves."

"Oh, you think you're funny? You look like The Grinch with your green ass outfit!"

"Knobhead!"

"Ugly!"

Their rivalry continued through college, where they both pursued dance as a major. It was during those intense years of training, late-night practices, and heated competitions that something unexpected happened. Amidst the rivalry, a mutual respect grew. They pushed each other to new heights, each striving to outdo the other while secretly admiring their passion and dedication.

"It would be better if we're in a V formation before that. It looked messy." Y/N said as they looked at the wide mirror.

"You think so? But it's my choreo, right?" 

"And I'm improving it." 

"Why don't we ask Soonyoung then, huh."

"CAN'T YOU TWO GET ALONG FOR ONCE?!" Soonyoung groaned as he looked at the two in front of him.

It wasn't until after college, at a chance encounter in a dance workshop, that they began to see each other differently. They bonded over their shared experiences, the highs and lows of their dance journeys, and soon realized that beyond the rivalry lay a genuine connection. 

From fighting because of who's the better dancer, the better one to lead the group, the better choreographer to fighting on who's paying for the meal, fighting whether Chan will walk with Y/N until she gets home, fighting if Chan would drive Y/N to her errands. And fighting their own self about their feelings.

Now, here they were—five years into a relationship and newly married. Chan still couldn't quite believe it sometimes, how the competitive fire that once burned between them had transformed into something deeper, warmer, and lasting.

Lost in his thoughts, Chan's gaze lingered on Y/N, who was humming softly to herself as she chopped vegetables. She glanced up, catching his eye with a warm smile.

"Hey, what are you staring at?" Y/N teased, her eyes twinkling with affection.

Chan chuckled, crossing the kitchen to wrap his arms around her from behind. "Just admiring my talented wife."

Y/N laughed, leaning back into his embrace. "And I thought you were supposed to be the tough, competitive one."

Chan rested his chin on her shoulder, a contented smile playing on his lips. "I guess some rivalries have a way of turning into the best partnerships."

Y/N turned in his arms, her expression softening. "I'm glad ours did."

Chan pressed a gentle kiss to her forehead, feeling a surge of gratitude for how far they had come. "Me too, baby. Me too."

"You're too sweet, maybe you can chop these up."

"Nope, I won the rock paper scissors, you do that, pretty."

"Tsk." Y/N said as Chan removed his arms from Y/N's and laughed loudly.

"Alright, I'll do it. Just sit there, baby."

[eri-pl]

Silm reread 13: Maeglin (The 13 is a fitting number)

TW, CW, all kinds of warnings: Eol is in this part. And Maeglin. So, you know. All that stuff will be mentioned. And some discussion of what Maeglin's plans were.

Aredhel wants to leave, Turgon's reply is interesting. It's not "my heart", but "my reason objects" which a) is a rare phrasing (but makes sense here) b) it turns out that Turgon does have a functioning reason. Also, he says it will end badly for both of them. Huh. I have a feeling that turgon does not very well distinguish between foresight and reasoning.

Aredhel feels as if he was trying to command her and gets upset. I don't think he is. I think Turgon is more worried about his secrets, than sexist and trying to command her, because he is the brother. He says it, even. The problem is people knowing the city's location going out.

The only remotely patronizing thing he says is "there are dangers the princess doesn't know about". But I don't feel like his whole attitude towards Aredhel is patronizing.

Thingol hates the sons of Feanor so much he doesn't let their friends in, or at least people who are visiting them. Which… it's after he learned about Alqualonde, right? It makes a lot of sense.

So Aredhel goes through the spider-country. I knew it will appear somewhere. Her "bodyguards" are lost and have to run away, but she's fine and competent and goes to C&C's home but they're not home.

Also, only on this reread I realized, how far those journeys are. Also, elven timescales. C&C are chillin with the 3rd C on a vacation and it lasts over a year. Aredhel gets bored, wanders into Nan Elmoth and :(

So, Nan Elmoth. Enchanted by Melian long ago, but now dark, the darkest forest. I did talk about Melian being Melkor-aligned, haven't I? (Not as in: evil. As in "she was close to him conceptually by "birth" but did not join the rebellion.) This is just my hc, but I felt like mentioning it.

So, Eol. Eol is very dark too and kind of sus. He doesn't like Doriath, he fled when Melian did the Girdle (why?), he loved shadow. He is a goth and this is kind of sus. He's also pals with Dwarves (who were evil in the early Legendarium). This in itself is not evil, but feels like a foreshadowing nonetheless. Also, I think no matter his morality, in each case he would be much more likely to use poison than the Noldor were. (Maybe non-lethal poison, if he was a nicer person). Also, he invents cool black goth!mithril galvorn. And he made the two coolest swords in the Legendarium, but this will be said later.

Also, he blames the Noldor fot Morgoth's return (unjustly) and for some other things, as we see later (justly).

Also, the narrative feels the need to explicitely tell us that he is not a Dwarf, but a noble Elf. Also he is sad but handsome and has darkvision. Which is cool.

What is not cool starts here. He sees Aredhel being pretty and wants her so he magics her into not being able to leave the forest and into wandering into his house, where he invites her in.

And they get married. In circumstances not elaborated about, but even if she did fall in love, the gps-jamming trick was very not ok as a way to flirt. And yes, he explicitely did it because he wanted her.

"Nobody claims the marriage was non-consensual" says the narrative. which very much reads as Pengolodh going "I will not claim it for lack of proof, but I think it". Anyway, ok, let's take it at face value, she fell in love, ok, fine, he was handsome and had cool swords, I get it.

Aaaand as her husband he ordered Aredhel to not go in sunlight, and to not meet the sons of Feanor or even any other Noldor. this guy really needs a course on relationships. (To be honest to Eol, his parents are never mentioned and such stuff often is generational, so his fault might have been less that it feels. But still. I want to punch him.)

Maeglin. He is really good at reading people's minds, and at commanding people. Also, he's tall, dark-eyed, dark-haired, pale and Noldor-shaped. Tl;dr: he is really handsome.

Dad takes him to visit the Dwarves and Maeglin learns stuff. Mom tells him about the Noldor and Maeglin wants to meet Turgon and the Feanorians. Eol rants at him, partially reasonable (they mourdered our close kin and stole are lands), partially not (you are my son, so you will do as I say or I will bind you).

Ugh. his idea of a family. I'm pretty sure he had some orcs in the line, or at least some escaped thralls with a lot of emotional damage. This sounds like Angband logic.

Maeglin doesn't seem to love his father either: he wants to leave with Aredhel, because he learned all that he could from Eol (and the Dwarves), so what use in staying. I don't blame him. So they leave.

C&C don't like Eol (not surprising with his attitude towards the Noldor) and Curufin is said to be hasty (before it was Caranthir. I guess they both are?)

OK, I don't get it. Curufin disses Eol, but still he does tell him all he needs to know to find Aredhel (who is his friend, the book said, or at least Celegorm's). I guess this is the hasty personality at work.

Please, do not be like Curufin. when a suspicious / unknown person asks you about your friend's wherabouts, shut up, and check with your friend first. (Curufin did not have a phone, but still, he could have shut up.)

Also, Curufin, out of all people, gives Eol a sort-of-prophecy! With all the "my heart is telling me". Which checks out later.

"I can't kill you because the laws of the Eldar" — well, it is before Doriath, so maybe he still cares? Or maybe it's just "Maedhros would be mad at me".

Eol is good at sneaking, I suppose, but the guards of Gondolin are better at guarding. They catch him and, because he says that he's Aredhel's husband, they do not kill him against the king's explicit orders on what to do with tresspassers. I have no idea what to make of this whole situation (not logically, logically it makes sense. But narratively, thematically.)

Eol sees the city and is amazed, and gets even angrier and more hateful at the Noldor. It reminds me of something. "you have a lot of cool stuff, I hate you even more" is rthe exact same reaction as (canonically) Melkor has after his release from Mandos. and Turgon, just like Manwe, is clueless not reading people's minds and it wouldn't be posiible in this case anyway. And is kind and gives him the benefit of doubt.

Eol refuses to shake his hand, like an upset preschooler, and disses Turgon. He starts very reasonably (this is our land, you are proud and did a lot wring, also I don't care about your city's secrets), but then he gets on the sexism again. And heavily.

His argument is "I will take my son, but if you as the brother claim Aredhel, I am ok with this". Seriously. What. Where did you learn it? Dwarves? Are Dwarves this awful? Angband thralls? Orcs?

Also, he tries to kill Maeglin on the logic of "you can't keep what is mine", which (I am sorry to everyone who will feel offended on part of their blorbo) sounds like Feanor's attitude about the Silmarils. Or worse, depending how you read Feanor. Would Feanor rather see the Silmarils destroyed and noone getting them, or see them going to the Valar? This may need a poll. ;)

Aaand he curses Maeglin too. Idril has some kind of foresight and this curse makes Maeglin sus in her eyes.

Maeglin is going strainght to the top, he's important in the city, widely respected and appreciated by Turgon. He's got a circle of friends: people like metalworking gravitate towards him. He is in the city council, and does well and wisely. He is also a brave warrior and fights in the Unnumbered tears. And does very well. He is by far not a loser.

But. He is in love with Idril (happens, especially when you have emotional trauma falling in love is random and weird and not always with the best people for you). And he never talks to anyone about it. Which is understandable with his background, but also very unhealthy. It kills him from the inside.

Idril (who is apparently also really good at osanwe) notices his love for her and is freaked out. Which is fine on both sides. Not "fine" as "pleasant" but as "no blame here". Emotional issues often lead to someone's emotions "leaking out" and being uncomfortable to be around without any actual bounduary-crossing. Just the vibe. And Elves have this much more, they have semi-telepathy! Also, Idril is under no obligation to love him back, and she does treat him politely, so no blame here either.

It will get worse, of course. On his side. But now I think it's not. also, I need English quotes.

"he loved the beauty of Idril and desired her, without hope" — this sounds as if he accepted the fact that she won't love him. Which is the appropriate reaction. Probably the only Tolkien quote, where "without hope" is a positive. Well, semi-positive. If he had some hope (or at least'; was open to the possibility) of finding another love or learning to live single, things would maybe go better. Still, this sounds like acceptance to me.

BUT

"But as the years passed still Maeglin watched Idril, and waited, and his love turned to darkness in his heart." — waited for what???

The interpratations I can think of:

Pro-Maeglin:

waited for this feeling to pass

just generally waited, as in: "he grew and stuff happenned"

waited for something to happen even though it was not possible — it worked for Indis after all, and I'm sure he knew this story — but fully passively and with no plan to do anything creepy (which I think would be an ok reaction, maybe unwise but not bounduary-crossing)

Mixed:

this sentence and the "without hope" sentence came from two different sources (both in-world and when Cristopher Tolkien complied the silm) with different characterizations of pre-capture Maeglin

Negative:

he regained "hope" (inquotes because it's a very nasty kind of amdir in this case and doesn't deserve the word) and flirted with her despite her protests, he was a creep

was even worse a creep and waited for the opportunity to "wed" Idril his father's way or worse (not only deceit but force)

had no hope for wedding but waited for revenge "if I can't have her, I will kill her" AKA his father's way again

I have no idea what the intended meaning is in here.

The "darkness" may be anything from trauma (more unprocessed emotions), through hopelessness (if I can't have Idril, I can't have anything good and y life is meaningless) to outright premeditation for rape.

Meaglin is a very ambiguous character in the text. He will get worse, but he will get worse after close contact with Morgoth, so it isn't necessarily a good measure of his personality at this stage. But there isn't one clear reading of him, at least in the text itself.

(eol is …. not ambiguous, but very ambivalent. He's got a lot of common sense! His political opinions about the Noldor are not all correct, but many of them are very on-point and better said than Thingol's. But also he's awfully sexist and violent.)

Also, no mention of Anguirel. :(

And I would love to see a connection between his unrequited love, "darkness" and the sword. This needs some HCs one day. The feelings resonating with the black blade, making it more deadly and precise. The metal cooling the feelings, making them a dark, icy thing that cannot be talked about. definitely needs a hc or fic.

[kobbers]

I continue to love Dwarf Fortress' ability to tell you a story, if you're paying attention.

My current fortress is my first time back in DF in a good 5+ years, and obviously first fort in the shiny new Steam version. I've been a little impulsively reckless because I tried out the tutorial, which autopicks your starting location and supplies. I breached the caverns, had some Fun sending squads after forgotten beasts a little above their level, and after an ettin dropped an adamantine slab on death, that winter's goblin raid spiked to ~100 strong. Most of my soldiers were wiped out stopping the wave of goblins who'd managed to climb over my half-roofed-pasture walls, but the fortress endured.

We've been bunkered in pretty safely ever since, while I try to rebuild my military. The exterior has been secured and meatier defenses have been installed, and the caverns have been walled off while grotesque procedurally-generated monsters roam around down there and tear up all the native serpent-people and troglodytes. I'm not exploiting any mechanics to train my soldiers more quickly (yet), so day-to-day fortress management has settled into a largely hands-off routine.

Except for one very unhappy dwarf, one of my tavern keepers, who began appearing in the logs having mental breakdowns (stumbling around obliviously). These finally escalated to a full tantrum, where he started fistfighting everyone in sight until he'd burned off enough anger to calm down. The disorderly conduct landed him in jail - he served his time, but lost his cool again soon after. This time, he fatally paralyzed a fellow citizen in the brawl.

Back to jail he went. Desperate to try and manage his mood before his mental health reached irreversible lows, I sent dwarves to smooth and engrave his prison cell (dwarves appreciate art!), and build him a bed (to avoid negative thoughts about sleeping on the floor). Unfortunately he threw another tantrum while this work was going on, and killed another dwarf who was just trying to draw pretty pictures on his wall. (Interestingly, this all still counts as "disorderly conduct" and not murder to the justice system, probably because his intent was only to punch people. It just so happened that he punched them in the spine, and injured the nerves that allowed their lungs to function.)

I looked at the unmet needs in his profile. What could I do to help resolve some of the things that were making him unhappy, to help pull him out of the emotional pit he was in? A too-long unfulfilled need to be with family caught my eye. Sometimes you can't do much about this, because the dwarf left their family behind to emigrate to the fortress, but when I checked his relationships I saw his two children were babies. Probably in the fortress, then! Where?

When I zoomed to the location of one of his children, it took my cursor to an empty tile in the caverns, and I had a full-on flashback, suddenly realizing who this man was.

Forgotten beast, four years ago. A giant three-eyed spider invaded the caverns. I sent our primary squad of nearly-legendary fighters to engage, but there was a problem. It was sheltering up in the mushroom trees, spitting from range, and most of our troops used melee weapons. The captain of the guard threw herself into battle regardless, climbing into the mushroom tree and braving the beast's globs of deadly spittle. During the fight, the creature ripped one of the newborn twins she was carrying away from her (dwarven mothers, istg), and threw it out of the tree to the cavern floor. Then it did the same with the other twin. It followed them down and easily stomped them to death, and the captain flew into a rage. Their duel was sadly brief, but unlike so many fights where the loser passes out from pain/exhaustion and gets coup de grâce'd, she stayed on her feet and fought to her last breath. Her squad was able to finish the kill after she perished.

This was why our troublemaker was having such a hard time. I'd built a fancy tomb for my badass captain and the babies who fell in battle back when it happened, and this tavern keeper was the husband left behind. As goblins seiged the fortress and his pining for family only intensified over time, he'd finally reached his limit and could no longer hold it together.

I went back to trying to fix him, with the understanding that it was probably a lost cause. Maybe making sure he could have booze in jail instead of water would help? I waited for his next tantrum, where he helplessly canceled tasks to fight people because he was chained firmly to the prison wall. Then once he calmed, I swooped in and made a stockpile for alcohol that he could reach. Now to wait for someone to bri-- wait, what are those combat logs? There's no new tantrum ongoing, what...?

Turned out he'd earned a beating in addition to his prison sentence this time, and a fortress guard had finally come by to deliver it. The guard was armed, but as this was just a disciplinary beating, she only used her fists. Unfortunately she was still too strong, and it was the tavern keeper's turn to get a badly bruised spinal cord. I deflated a bit as I watched him suffocate, but couldn't help but feel it was a little bittersweet. He was no longer left behind.

[cilil]

Nerdanel's origin

Finally getting around to talk about one of my favorite recent headcanons (I have @thecoolblackwaves to thank for motivating me), yet another one that started out as crack and then I fell in love with it.

Tldr: Nerdanel's mysterious absent mother is none other than Aulë.

Here's the idea. We know that Aulë was not only very excited about the arrival of Ilúvatar's Children (a detail about him that was already present in Lost Tales and is very cute), but also wanted children of his own, so much so that he went behind Eru's and Yavanna's backs to create his Dwarves. In the end he got to keep them too, but he had to "put them away" to awaken later and they also live in Middle-earth and not with him (at least not in life).

So when Mahtan and Aulë grew close and started to hang out a lot, they probably got drunk one night and Mahtan confided in Aulë, saying that he'd love to have a child, to which Aulë is like "me too, bestie" and they decide to just have one together. Between Aulë's Ainurin shapeshifting and his apparent ability to just construct fully biologically functional bodies in his backyard, they did just fine and baby Nerdanel was born (I have the cutest mental image of a little girl sitting on the broad shoulders of her big strong forge dads).

Now Aulë and Mahtan decided to keep this a secret, probably because some sort of Valar rules may or may not have been bent a little in the process. What Yavanna would think of this depends on how everyone's own headcanons regarding Ainurin marriages, but it may be a bit embarrassing for her that her husband keeps procreating with either himself or other people who are not her. Also they don't want little Nerdanel to grow up being regarded as a weird cryptid.

So Mahtan proceeded to raise Nerdanel, acting like he totally had a thing with some woman somewhere, and Aulë supported them to the best of his ability, which mostly means teaching them cool stuff.

Nerdanel grew up looking like a normal Elf (huge relief for poor Mahtan), the main indicator of her Valarin heritage being that she's quite strong (she definitely picked up Fëanor and threw him over her shoulder constantly), carrying her statues around on her own without breaking a sweat. Aulë and Mahtan taught her the basics of smith-craft, but since sculpting is her passion, she switched to that and Aulë showed her some cool tricks with that instead.

Inevitably, Nerdanel started asking questions and one day found out the truth about her "mother". She then made Aulë and Mahtan promise that they'd all keep it secret because she wanted to be known and liked for being Nerdanel, not for being some experiment of Aulë's. They agreed and have kept their word. She also never told Fëanor, at first because she didn't want him to become interested in her only for her connection to Aulë and in the years after because she didn't want to damage their relationship. Fëanor remains unaware to this day, though is still impressed by his wife's strength, particularly when it came to doing what she does on top of carrying his sons.

So yeah, that's the idea. Nerdanel also shares some of her core traits with Aulë, such as being free of mind, thirsty for knowledge and strong-willed, but also patient. You could even see parallels between her relationship with Fëanor and Aulë's relationship with Yavanna, as Fëanor and Yavanna both have quite a temper and need a spouse who can take that.

[freshcuntgrass]

An unflattering assumption I have about every NPC in Stardew Valley

Sam: gave Gus a fake ID to get alcohol. Jodi never goes to the saloon and Kent is afraid he forgot how old Sam is, so he's never getting called on it

Sebastian: has ruined at least one online D&D group playing an edgy lone-wolf rogue with no parents

Maru: still brings up her SAT score in conversation sometimes

Demetrius: has the Neil deGrasse Tyson thing going where he assumes every field is easy because he's good at biology. Maru finds this endearing with her gadgets; he is banned from looking at Sebastian's code

Wizard: same as Demetrius but ten times worse

Robin: first marriage ended because she slept with the wizard (Sebastian is his). What can I say, she likes em brilliant, socially awkward, and just a little insufferable

Clint: you KNOW this man's on Reddit and you KNOW he does not have a healthy relationship with it. I am begging Sebastian to "fix some tech problems for him" (install a secret browser extension block on the manosphere subreddits)

Elliott: hair-trigger crier. Poems, books, the end of every rom-com, songs you do not think it should be possible to cry during, noticed the cat sleeping in a really cute way, remembers that he lives near the ocean... honestly he'd have a lot more written by now if his entire day wasn't taken up by crying and hair care

Willy: has lived alone too long, holds conversations with most objects in his house

Leah: has NEVER swept or mopped the floor of that cabin. You can't see it in the pixel art but it's a biohazard

Pierre: Twitter power-user, unironically calls it X

Caroline: doing her own research on the COVID vaccine

Haley: Swiftie

Penny: even bigger Swiftie

Abigail: Homestuck

Alex: media literacy so bad he doesn't realize the insane homoeroticism of Top Gun

Harvey: terrified that someone in town will look closer at the degree on his wall and realize he's technically an RN, not a doctor, and then it'll just be awkward

Lewis: that truffle oil was for pegging

Evelyn: "secret family recipe" is boxed chocolate cake mix with mayonnaise instead of the oil

George: Hey... um... hey guys? Where was George on January 6th?

Pam: Hey guys, where was Pam on January 6th???

Gus: definitely drunk behind that bar most of the time. He gets away with it because it comes across as "jolly"

Linus: can't go back to Zuzu City. He knows what he did

Jodi: biggest Swiftie of them all. She name-searches. Yes, she's still on Tumblr. Hi Jodi, your fave is mid, looking forward to the anon hate :)

Kent: agrees with Alex that Top Gun isn't gay. Nothing's gay in the military

Sandy: unreal amount of mobile gaming going on back behind that counter. stop sending me Farmville requests

Marnie: actually accepts Sandy's Farmville requests. Keeps texting Shane minion memes

Shane: the real unflattering assumption with Shane is when you correctly clock a fellow Stardew Valley player as a Shane girlie. In our defense, he's going through a lot and we can fix him.

Krobus: eats those void eggs raw. Cracks the shell and drinks em. Slurp slurp bitch

Dwarf: honestly HUGE drug dealer vibes. Miner's Treat has got to be the dwarves' version of cocaine, right?

Vincent and Jas: safe for now, I don't roast anybody under 12. once we hit like year 5 I'm coming for you though

Emily: wants to reblog this but can't. her queue is full and she's hit post limit

[mylifeisfruk4ever]

Group Project has been created

Patroclus has added Achilles, Odysseus, Menelaus, and Diomedes to Group Project.

Patroclus's name has been changed to Baby

Achilles's name has been changed to I'm sexy and I know it

Odysseus 's name has been changed to SmartAss

Diomedes's nickname has been changed to Fight me

Menelaus's nickname has been changed to Himbo

 

Baby: I'm starting to regret it.

I'm sexy and I know it: If you want, you can change your nickname.

Baby: Nope, I'm Baby and I know it.

Himbo: Did you just…did you just mention LMFAO?

Baby: Achilles' nickname is the fucking song name. I stated a fact.

SmartAss: Guys, this is ridiculous. It should be a science project group.

I'm sexy and I know it: do you want to change and become Gayleo?

SmartAss: Gayleo never existed.

I'm sexy and I know it: Speak for yourself. He is my guide and inspiration!!!

Fight me: Are you making gay jokes without me?!

I'm sexy and I know it: Never, bro!

SmartAss: guys, we should get organized for the project! The professor gave us carte blanche!

I'm sexy and I know it: we have time!

SmartAss: Three weeks!

I'm sexy and I know it: at worst you enter the professor's house and change your grades. It would not be the first time.

SmartAss: hth yu know?

I'm sexy and I know it: Gays know everything.

Baby: we saw you come out of Professor Nestor's window. You fell and rolled a few feet. Then you got up and pretended you were there for a walk.

SmartAss: You have no proof.

Himbo: I'm starting to think that maybe it was better to be in a group with my cousin.

 

6pm.

I'm sexy and I know it: so, I have a scientific headcanon…

SmartAss: Please say theory! You have a scientific theory!

I'm sexy and I know it: Anyway, I have a scientific headcanon. But I need Hector in a locked room and a gun.

Baby: Achilles, we will not use Russian roulette for our project.

I'm sexy and I know it: But it's for science! Probability theory! It's brainy.

Himbo: Still no. Let's use Paris.

Fight me: what if we put Paris and Hector in a room with only one gun? What would happen?

SmartAss: Bold of you assumes that Hector doesn't strangle his brother after five minutes.

Himbo: mood.

 

8pm

SmartAss: We need an idea!

Fight me: I think using Hector and Paris would solve our problems.

SmartAss: but it's illegal!

Fight me: and since when do you worry?

SmartAss: Since there might be evidence that can frame me, or too many witnesses. I have nothing against you guys, but I would kill you and hide your bodies so I don't end up in prison. No offense.

Himbo: We already knew that

Fight me: That's why Ajax hates you.

I'm sexy and I know it: doesn't Ajax hate him because Odysseus stole his job as captain of the rugby team?

Fight me: Also.

SmartAss: Some don't know how to lose.

Himbo: You weren't even on the team.

SmartAss: and now I'm captain. Your point?

Baby: Forget Hector and Paris. I want to study Odysseus.

I'm sexy and I know it: are you cheating on me for the dwarf?!

SmartAss: Hey!

Fight me: don't listen to him, bro. It is known that dwarves have something else that is very great.

Himbo: And how do you know?

Fight me: you'd like to know, huh?

 

8.45pm

SmartAss: studying the dysfunctional relationships of Ettore's family is not a bad idea...

Himbo: What changed your mind?

SmartAss: I went to take out the garbage…

I'm sexy and I know it: it's not nice to talk like that about Diomedes.

Fight me: Fuck you

I'm sexy and I know it: Baby already takes care of it.

Himbo: gross

I'm sexy and I know it: you're just jealous. You and Helen never like us.

Fight me:  I would kill them myself.

SmartAss: guys, focus. Social experiment. Relationships between brothers, and we use Hector and all his brothers.

Fight me: how many are there again? Twelve?

Himbo: now nineteen. Hecuba has just given birth.

Fight me: Nineteen?!

Baby: they should have stopped with the twins. It was enough. Hell, they should have stopped at Paris. They had to understand that it would only be worse later.

Himbo: but what job does Priam do? There are twenty-two people, two dogs, a cat, and Paris. How can he live in such a big house?

SmartAss: doesn't he work for the government?

Fight me: no government job pays this well!

Himbo: unless you're the president. 

I'm sexy and I know it: what if he is the head of the CIA?

Baby: Sure, and the head of the CIA came to this city to check out a high school and a very dangerous Blockbuster. Never mind that they sell DVDs of terrorists.

Fight me: But it would make sense because he has so many children. They are all future Spy Kids!

Himbo: if the fate of my country is in the hands of Paris, I will expatriate and change my name.

I'm sexy and I know it: Cassandra knows things. It's clearly spy training.

Fight me: Cassandra talks bullshit.

Himbo: You're only saying that because she told everyone that you had tea dressed as a fairytale princess with your six-year-old cousin.

Fight me: this has never happened! Cassandra is a liar!

Himbo: and where did the glitter in your hair come from?

Fight me: it wasn't glitter.

Himbo: And what was it?

Fight me: heroine

SmartAss: It was glitter.

SmartAss: Anyway, social experiment. We will observe Ettore and his family, thus describing their social dynamics.

Baby: Isn't that stalking?

SmartAss: no, it's science.

 

 

8am

I'm sexy and I know it: Outside school Cassandra came up to me and gave me a card with her family's schedule.

I'm sexy and I know it: she told me since you want to spy on us, better know when you will find us all.

I'm sexy and I know it: then she disappeared

Fight me: every time. Wtf.

Himbo: Am I the only one wondering how she knew or…

Baby: Dude, the fewer questions you ask, the better.

Fight me: this proves nothing! she just got lucky!

SmartAss: send nudes!!!

Fight me: I would love to do it but I'm almost at school.

SmartAss: No, idiot! No nudes. Dudes

SmartAss: Come help me! Ajax is chasing me! With a car!

Himbo: What did you do to him this time?

SmartAss: nothing!

Fight me: liar.

Fight me: give me a minute and I'll be with you.

 

8.30am

Fight me: RIP Odysseus

Fight me: he's not dead, but as soon as Ajax gets out of the hospital, he'll definitely kill him.

SmartAss: in my defense, he wanted to do me worse than send me to the hospital.

Himbo: Aren't you two supposed to be in class?

SmartAss: what part of Ajax wanted me dead wasn't clear to you?

Baby: How the hell you are alive? Ajax is twice your size.

SmartAss: If I told you, I'd have to kill you.

Baby: the alarming thing is that I never know when he's joking or serious.

Himbo: you guys scare me.

I'm sexy and I know it: you still have time to do the project with your cousin.

Himbo: better not

Himbo: I don't know if he would try to kill me, steal my girlfriend or sleep with my brother

Baby: i'm starting to think that it's not just Hector who has a dysfunctional family

Fight me: why don't I have sexy cousins who want to sleep with me?

I'm sexy and I know it: Thersites wants to fuck you.

Fight me: but he is not sexy!!!

Baby: If I have to go to therapy one day, I'll show these chats.

SmartAss: this should be a serious group chat...

I'm sexy and I know it: dude, did you see us?

I'm sexy and I know it: nobody here is normal. except Pat, but  he is perfect, so...

SmartAss: ...

SmartAss: we are doomed.

Fight me: prepare the copy of Nestore's house keys.

Fight me: you will need it

[asgardianhobbit98]

Four for Valentine: Week 4 "Sugar"

Fandom: The Hobbit

Pairing: Fili / female OC (Kalâtha)

Important Tags: Fluff, romance, start of a relationship, Dwarven Culture HC

Summary: Put on cooking duty by Thorin, Fili and Kalâtha have a heart to heart about why Fili has been acting so distracted lately. The reason? Dwarves only love once.

Words: 2163

Written for my "Four for Valentine" event 🩷

Tag list: @fizzyxcustard @middleearthpixie @glassgulls @evenstaredits @knittastically @heilith @lathalea @way-too-addicted-to-fandoms @nowandthane

if you want to be removed or added to my tag list, please let me know 🩷

Dwarves only loved once.

That thought kept distracting Fili during a quest that was sure to become historically known to his kin. And it was embarrassing.

Fili should be focusing on the quest at hand. He should be focusing on keeping his brother protected. And he should be focusing on showing Thorin how far he’d come; that his uncle could be proud to call him crown prince soon. Yet… here he was. Doing the opposite of focusing.

Such an important quest… and all he could think about was her.

Whether the others were aware of what was distracting Fili, he wasn’t sure of. Either way, his uncle had suddenly begun to task him and Kalâtha to do chores together when camping for the night, leaving Kili to work with Ori. Which was odd because his uncle never separated the two brothers. Especially considering the deal Thorin had made with Dis to make sure both her sons stayed close to keep an eye on each other.

So perhaps at least his uncle knew?

It had begun as a childhood crush. Which then stuck with him into his teenage years. He’d thought it would be nothing more but that. But… then in his young adult years Fili felt the crush only grow stronger and grasp onto his heart.  

Even when Kalâtha left the Blue Mountains to pursue a path of self discovery, Fili had not felt his feelings dissipate in the slightest. No matter the week long flings he’d had with others, Kalâtha was always the one on his mind in the late hours of the nights, even when not alone in his own bed.

And now…?

Now as they had picked her up from her new life among the humans in Bree (of all forsaken places) and found her just the same, just with a tad more confidence, Fili felt his feelings… blossom. As if he had just fallen down from the cliff he had been hanging from all this time, down into a vast ocean of warmth and uncertainty with the waves of both these feelings crashing into him painfully, anxiously, lovingly… lustfully.

And he was stuck. Because…

Dwarves only loved once.

Did Kalâtha feel the same? Did she look at him differently? Did she even view him this way?

If she didn’t…

“Fili?”

“Huh?” he blurted out a little louder than he should have.

“Are you even listening to me?” she asked, with little malice in her voice. Instead, she was smiling, close to laughing at him… He would be fine if she laughed at him. She could be cruel and vicious to him too if she wanted. It didn’t matter… He was far gone in his love for her and any attention was like a high to him. But she could never be cruel. She was too good for that. Luckily. Because he truly would have let himself be tossed around by her if she so desired.

“Fili?” 

She snapped her fingers in front of his eyes. He’d gotten lost in her again.

Now, though, she looked worried. “What is up with you? You’ve been acting strange this entire journey. Are you ill?”

Fili shook his head, his braided moustache hitting the sides of his cheeks with the urgency of his gesture. “No, not ill.”

“Then what?”

The two of them were sitting crouched in front of the campfire, waiting for Bofur to get it started. Their task was to cook dinner. Which… Fili had to admit wasn’t his strongest side. Kalâtha ended up doing most of the work.

“What indeed,” Bofur teased with a little look to Fili.

Okay, so the entire company did know what was up with Fili.

Somehow that didn’t comfort Fili in the slightest. It only gave him more anxiety because how could he show his uncle he could lead a people some day when he dropped his daggers or tripped over nothing whenever Kalâtha glanced his way?

“Uh… Well, I’m not quite confident in my cooking abilities,” Fili lied.

Kalâtha giggled. That gorgeous divine giggle that she had. She flipped her beard braids to the side a bit in a cocky gesture at which Fili smirked: “Don’t worry, I know how to make an amazing stew.”

“Good,” Fili responded. “I’d expect nothing less from you.” That had meant to come out as praise because he truthfully thought everything she did was amazing, and perhaps it had because Kalâtha hadn’t originally reacted... But in his stupid state, Fili panicked: “Oh uh… Not because you’re a woman. I simply meant-“

“Fili,” Kalâtha interrupted with a laugh. “You’ve not changed a bit, have you?”

“No… I suppose I haven’t.”

He glared at Bofur as he snickered at the exchange. Great… Another moment where he’d made a fool of himself.

…

During the duration of their chore, Fili did mainly some chopping… and the rest was staring. At Kalâtha.

She was busy, determined to teach Fili the recipe of her stew. But she wasn’t aware of the fact that the only details Fili was taking in were the details of her face, her beard, her hair, her ears, her nose…

He was closer to her now than he was usually when he found himself able to freely watch her. So he saw all these new little details that he adored. Like how she wrinkled her nose a bit when opening the lid of the pot and steam touched her face. Or how her lips moved when she said his name. How sometimes she bit her lower lip when focusing on a task like stirring the stew. Or perhaps it was mild anxiety that made her do so as she was a perfectionist. She was most certainly worrying about this not tasting the way it should, even if that only meant there being a little bit too much or too little salt.

“Fili?”

He blinked out of the stare, quickly pretending that he had, indeed, been listening.

“More salt.”

Fili reached back, not wanting to stop watching her, and grabbed the bag he thought to be salt, handing it to her. Trusting him, she didn’t double check the contents of the bag and simply put the required amount of salt into the stew.

“There. And then, you let it simmer for a few minutes before tasting, so the spices have time to melt into the vegetables and meat.” Kalâtha turned her head to Fili, catching his eye. Or, rather, his stare.

A smile spread over her lips.

He smiled back.

“Did you listen to a single thing I just said?”

Fili eagerly nodded his head. “We have to let it simmer for a bit.”

“And before that?” she tasked him with a raised eyebrow.

“Uh… Basilica makes a good replacement for oregano?”

He hadn’t gotten it right. That was obvious. Because Kalâtha stared at him in disbelief for a moment before shaking her head. “Okay so… are we going to talk about it?”

“What?” Fili asked panicked.

“About what’s up with you? Come on, Fili. You’re my closest friend. At least, you were before I left. You can still talk to me.” She reached out, surprisingly hesitant for the confident woman that she was, and grasped his hand in hers. “Fili?”

“I.. uh…” he stuttered out, the nerve endings in his fingers exploding under her touch and sending shockwaves of literal alarm to his brain, shortcutting everything, it seemed. “Uh…”

And then she looked… sad. Grieved by his seeming hesitance to talk to her.

And all of a sudden any panic, any hesitance, disappeared in an instance because underneath all that fluster and the nerves was the core of his love for her, which burned brighter than any nervousness he might have: and that core was made up of his love language, which was protection.

From everything.

Even little moments of hurt feelings.

And this was one of those.

He squeezed her fingers tightly and stopped stuttering as he reassured her with a determined look: “You’re right. I have been acting strange. A fool, some might say. But that is not because I view you any different. Or… It is, but it is in no way a negative view.”

“What do you mean?” she asked.

The bustle of the Dwarves around them doing their assigned chores meant a strange bubble of privacy was created. Only the two of them were listening to each other, others too busy. And it felt more intimate than any other private moment they’d shared before when it was just the two of them in one room.

It helped give Fili the boost of confidence he needed.

“I mean I think you’re… amazing. I have thought so since the first time your parents brought you over during that dinner… Dis and your mother were speaking the entire night, and you were so shy. I didn’t know how to approach you.”

“Kili ended up talking my ear off,” Kalâtha reminisced, smiling wonderfully at what Fili was saying. She seemed a little hesitant… no, nervous? But her confidence, her calmness, was infectious. Despite what Fili was about to admit to her, he felt secure and safe with her. As if no matter what her answer was, he was in good hands. “Then he brought you over and you talked my ear off.”

“That’s – Well, yes, I suppose I did.” She giggled. He smiled. “I didn’t know why I was so nervous approaching you then. Only years later did I realise you made me nervous. But not in a bad way. A good way.”

Kalâtha grew quiet now, watching Fili intently. Or was that… hopeful?

“And then those sort of…”

“Butterflies?” she clarified, as if knowing.

Now Fili grew hopeful too. “Yes…” he breathed out. “Yes, just like butterflies. They stayed. Throughout my entire youth. I thought maybe… it was just…”

“A crush. But then it didn’t go away,” Kalâtha finished for him. As he watched her, dumbfounded by her means to finish his thoughts, she smiled sweetly at him. “My dear, did you think you were the only one?”

“I did, actually.” Fili’s honest response made her the dumbfounded one. “I thought there was no way you could feel this way for me. Especially not since I’ve been acting a fool this entire journey.”

Kalâtha giggled. Then she chuckled and slowly her chuckles turned into a snorting laughter. “Oh,” she managed to get out, “is that why…?”

“Yes.” Fili blushed, his brows furrowing into a pleading look upon which Kalâtha calmed herself down and squeezed their still intertwined fingers to reassure him. “I never thought…”

“Dwarves only love once,” Kalâtha repeated the words Fili had been worrying about this entire time. “I was scared that I’d lost my chance at love to someone who could never even think about liking me back. So I never mentioned it.”

“I… That’s exactly why I never did!”

Then the two shared a bout of laughter together, inching closer to each other in a gesture that was… new but welcome.

But before any more words could be said, or before any other loving gestures could be made – Bofur appeared again.

“How’s food coming along?”

Letting go of each other’s hands, Fili watched as Kalâtha opened the lid of the pot once more and showed the food to Bofur.

He sniffed the aromas happily, either completely unaware of what he had just interrupted, or finding some amusement in interrupting it… Either way, he looked very pleased with himself.

And he also had an extra bag of coins at his side.

“Smells heavenly. A little sweet too, what’s in it?” Bofur asked.

“Sweet?” Kalâtha asked in confusion. “No, it shouldn’t be sweet.” She grabbed a spoon to fill it up with some of the sauce, tasting it…

She pulled a face of surprise, then slight disgust.

She looked around at the spices they’d used, frantically searching for the culprit of whatever had made her stew taste strange enough for her to pull a face Fili hadn’t seen before.

Then she slowly lifted the salt bag. Her eyes shifted to Fili. Bofur glanced between the two of them. “What’s wrong?”

Fili wondered the same thing, raising an eyebrow at Kalâtha.

“Fili… You gave me sugar, not salt.” She looked amused. After their conversation, it was obvious why he’d been distracted enough not to notice this mistake. At least he wasn’t getting reprimanded.

“Well, I’m glad it amuses some of ya. Bombur’s not gonna be quite so happy,” Bofur pointed out.

Kalâtha sighed. “It’s alright. I can fix it. Just tell everyone it’s gonna take a few extra minutes before we eat.”

Bofur left with this message, and somewhere from camp Kalâtha and Fili could hear a distinct ‘aww…’ from Bombur at the disappointment of having to wait longer.

But Kalâtha and Fili didn’t mind in the slightest. Now actually capable of focusing, Fili sat with his arm around her waist, offering her the right ingredients whilst relishing in the feeling of her leaning against him…

comments and reblogs are highly appreciated if you enjoyed this 🩷

[imakemywings]

do you have any good female fics to rec?

DO I. LOL. Putting this immediately under a cut because there are a lot! There are so many talented writers in this fandom who do ENORMOUS justice to female characters, both original and book-based. Couple of blog recs at the bottom too!

(I'm assuming this is asking for Tolkien fanfic since that's mostly what I'm on about these days, but if you'd rather see Mass Effect or Dragon Age I can do that too.)

I'm glad you asked! φ(*￣0￣)

I'm going to keep all of these to 1 rec per author just so we don't get totally out of control here.

Forging Gold by @swanmaids ft. Curufin's wife, Dwarf OCs. Heather is an amazing source of female character fic in this fandom; she has well-developed OCs for all of Feanor's daughters-in-law and treats canon female characters with such care and love. Absolutely recommend checking out the rest of her stuff!

Prick a Finger, Cut Your Hand by @welcomingdisaster ft. Indis, Miriel. A really great look at the dynamic between these two. Lena has lots of other good takes on female Tolkien characters too!

Friendship and Stern Demand by @polutrope ft. Elwing. Fantastic exploration of what the communications between Elwing and Maedhros might have looked like!

Untitled by @outofangband ft. Aerin, Morwen. Nelyo focuses a lot on the human characters so if you want to read more about what the mortal women went through in the First Age, definitely browse through their blog!

Abide, Abound by Elleth ft. Arwen, Tauriel. Elleth also has lots of works centering on female Tolkien characters.

And by their blazing signify that a great princess falls, but doth not die by TheLionInMyBed ft. Elwing. One of my favorite takes on Elwing's suicide.

Keeper of Kings by batshape ft. Lalwen. What did Lalwen get up to in Middle-earth? Seeing a lot of people die, for one thing.

Into the Heart of a Fey Thing by @amethysttribble ft. Aredhel, Galadriel, Luthien. Fun "behind-the-scenes" look at some adventures with these three!

A Fish Hook, an Open Eye by simaetha ft. Elwing, f!Maglor. Fascinating AU take on a meeting between Elwing and Maglor prior to the Third Kinslaying.

The Sleep of Flowers by Innin ft. Galadriel, Melian. Very beautiful scene, and plenty of other female-centric works by Innin!

Light Words About Nothing by Margo_Kim ft. Dis, Belladonna. I ship it.

Elwing's Strategy by lifeisyetfair ft. Elwing. Another great take on Elwing at the Third Kinslaying.

Out of Dreams, Into the Sun by solanaceae ft. Miriel, Indis.

Games and Fantasy by Genesis_Grey ft. Arwen, Eowyn. Ohh it captures that chivalric WLW so well.

Over the Unclear Eyes of Memory by Loriand_Lost ft. Anaire, Aredhel. Addresses Anaire's complicated feelings about Fingolfin's return to Valinor. This author also has a number of other great female-centric fics, highly recommend!

The Carriage Held but Just Ourselves by @starspray ft. Luthien, Elwing, Arwen. Amazing look at the line of Thingol's relationship with death. This author also has a whole series on Lalwen and an OFC!

Before the Breath of Storm by tinnurin ft. Dis, Dwarf OC. "Behind-the-scenes" look at the Dwarves before the battle of Azanulbizar.

This Now, This Us by crownlessliestheking ft. Indis, Miriel. Indis and Miriel talk after Miriel's return to Valinor.

The Tapestry by Zdenka ft. Thedowyn, Miriel. The ghost of Miriel Serinde offers some aid. This author also has a lot of female-centric works!

Not Undevoted by SatiricalDraperies ft. Galadriel, Melian.

Winter Sea by Tallulah ft. Finduilas, OFC. Finduilas had a girlfriend in the Falas. Another author with a great selection of female-centric works.

The Hunt by @cuarthol ft. Amarie. Amarie is trans and closeted in Valinor, but Finrod understands.

Come Home to Chaos (Get a Crush on a Queen) by ncfan ft. Arwen, Firiel. When Firiel of Gondor takes refuge in Rivendell, Arwen takes an interest.

Do I Hurt to Hold? by Anonymous ft. Galadriel, Melian. A darker look at their relationship.

That Time Elanor Gardner Had A Crush On Her Employer by Anonymous ft. Arwen, Elanor.

All My Shadows Fade by amyfortuna ft. Arwen, OFC. Unsent letter from a female friend of Arwen's as her wedding to Aragorn approaches. This author is also a good one to look at for more female-centric fic!

Orlaya by yeaka ft. Arwen, Tauriel. Cute!

Of All the Stars, the Fairest by whatiwouldnotgive ft. Arwen, Eowyn.

Or They Would Go On Aching Still by Farasha ft. Arwen, Tauriel. Oh, the grief!

Berrypicking Time by swamp_diamonds ft. Finduilas, Nienor.

Things They Don't Talk About by eris_of_imladris ft. Findis. Findis and Feanor have a complicated relationship.

Easily Sever What Never was One by vauquelin ft. Haleth. If you like Halenthir at all as a ship, you'll like this.

The One With All The Birds by clothono ft. Elwing, Nerdanel. I've said it before I'll say it again--my favorite Elwing fic.

Greensleeves by bravelittlscrib ft. Nerdanel. Little scenes of Nerdanel's life and her relationships.

Emerie by the_artifice_of_eternity ft. Erendis, Ancalime. Ancalime's last visit with her mother before taking the throne.

In the Family by arriviste ft. Celebrian, Galadriel.

At the Water's Edge by crackinthecup ft. Elwing, Idril.

And that's what I've got for you right now, I hope that helps! I would also advise checking out the blogs @tolkien-heroines and @sapphictolkien both of which focus on female characters in Tolkien's work. Happy reading, anon! ♪(^∇^*)

[innammoratta]

Thorin Oakenshield x Reader Pt. I

Concept: Middle Earth/Arda is only one realm among many. The reader is from Earthrealm and was hired to help Thorin's company by Gandalf's invitation. She's a fighter and a member of the Lin Kuei. This is a Mortal Kombat/Hobbit collaboration.

(This is not yet edited, please excuse any mistakes)

* * *

The company had convinced Bard to sail you all to Dale--not without payment of course, which Balin now calculated and counted as everyone chipped in. You surrendered a portion of your currency, placing it on the table in front of Balin, then returned to your sight seeing at the edge of the boat. Your elbows and forearms were perched on the rails and you leaned slightly forward. It was late evening and thick fog rose from the black lakes on which you sailed, offering a covering over the boat. The peaceful atmosphere was a welcome change from the never ending action you were always faced with. In your own realm, you could never imagine such peace. Yes, Arda evidently had a good share of evil beings and bloody battles, but it also had the Shire and Rivendell--beautiful cities and villages untouched by war.

Your own realm had peaceful towns and gorgeous scenery as well, but you never had time to appreciate them. This entire journey with Thorin and his company was the longest you had ever been out in the world,--or a world, rather?--free. You had never experienced the warm sunrise so many days in a row, having lived your whole life in the cold mountains of Tibet. You had never truly witnessed what life was like in every day cities and towns. Places like the Shire... places like Rivendell especially!--these were too good to be true. All your life, you had only known fighting, wars, tournamets.

But what struck you the most was the fellowship you saw within the people in Arda. From the moment you met the Company in Bilbo's home, you found that the warmth of the Dwarves had touched you in a way you felt you had been longing for your entire life. Their two songs, though strange at first, bewildered you the more you thought of them. The company was joined together in joy and in loss, expressing their emotions so freely. You had not been raised to show your emotions. In fact, it was custom, from where you came, to express nothing--but anger, perhaps.

The way they cared for each other, tending to each other's wounds, sharing meals, comforting each other when forlorn and laughing together when merry was all but familiar to you. At first you found their openess overwhelming and frankly exhausting, but you came to appreciate it.

In secret, part of you wanted to be as open and free as they were with their thoughts and hearts. Now, as many members of the company had expressed their utmost admiration for your fighting skills and made effort to take care of you while camped out, you found yourself longing to be a part of them. To share in their joys and share in their sadness, to care for others as they did and be as close as they were. You did not know what it was like to put your trust and confidence in an individual. In your clan, relationships such as these were not allowed. You may rely on your brothers and sisters as a whole, as the Lin Kuei, but never in a personal manner.

You squeezed your fists shut, angry at yourself for having lost the control you once had over your mind and emotions. The longer you were around the Dwarves, the more the intensity of your emotions increased. They had, without knowing, made you more aware of the desires of your heart.

You glanced once again to the table where Balin counted the coins and noticed Kili looking at you. When you met his eyes, he smiled, channeling so much warmth and real, raw emotion to you. He was grateful for your action just a few hours ago, when you had jumped on him to save him from the arrow of an Orc; when you saved his life. It would have been a waste to let him die. The others seemed to love him much.

By your observations, you figured you were supposed to smile back, but you were suddenly overwhelmed with emotions you were incapable of understanding. You did not let yourself feel them, pushing them into a bottle as you had been raised to do. But now it felt as if the bottle was pouring over, unable to contain anything more. You tore your gaze from Kili and tried to distract yourself with the beauty of the lake once again, though unsuccessfully.

"Is something wrong? Were you injured during the attack?" You were surprised to hear Thorin speak casually to you. He had never done so previously. Out of the members of the company, he was the most normal to you. He only spoke when necessary and maintained a calm disposition--though he did let his anger and frustration flow freely. His hostility did not shock you. It was understandable and even quite close to home for you.

You spared him a glance then looked away again, shaking your head. "No, I am fine."

He was unconvinced. It was easy to see you were troubled about something with your clenched fists and rapid, shallow breathing, but he knew better than to intrude. Instead, he thanked you for saving Kili, explaining that he had made a promise to his sister, their mother, to protect them best he could.

At the mention of their family, you felt the increasingly familiar anxiety form in your stomach. Your heart felt as if it was being crushed within you, and a scoff escaped your lips as you couldn't help but raise a hand to your hair, frustrated.

Next to you, Thorin frowned, confused about your response. "What?" He asked, expectantly.

"I apologize." You shook your head and straightened your posture, trying to shed away your troubled mind. "I only..."

Thorin took his hands off the edge of the boat, replacing them with his elbows as he mirrored your previous stance, leaning over to see you better. "Only what?"

You struggled to find the words, remaining silent for a few moments until making the decision to do as they did: speak their minds with utter honesty. "I am jealous of your family." You refused to make eye contact, eyes still fixed on the obscurity of the fog.

Thorin was dumbfounded, taken completely off guard by such an opinion. A sound escaped him, something between a scoff and a chuckle. "My family? You know next to nothing of them." He spares a quick glance at Kili and Fili. "You've only met my nephews."

You shook your head, turning so that you could look at him, but not in the eyes. "But you have a family... and I can tell from what I've witnessed and have been told that you... care for each other." You scratched at the wood beneath your hands, trying to quell your nerves.

Thorin thought for a moment, bewildered until he realized what you had implied. He wanted to ask a question or maybe offer his condolences, but his words ran dry.

"Look! there it is! The mountain!"

You had gratefully turned your attention to where the dwarves were pointing, but Thorin's eyes darted between you and the mountain as he became torn between the desire to continue talking with you and to relish in the moment he had spent years dreaming of; returning home.

With the arrival on land came more obstacles to overcome. Thorin was focused on sneaking past the guards of Dale, and reaching the safety of Bard's home, but he did not miss the way you stared at Bard and his children when they interacted. There was a deep longing in your eyes, maybe even sadness. However, he put aside his curiosity.

It wasn't until after the company had been discovered and the Master of Laketown had promised his help that Thorin began thinking of what to say to you. While you and the company enjoyed the feast hosted by the Master, Thorin was quiet. As soon as the company began filling up with ale, they became more rowdy than usual, no doubt their spirits having been lifted by being so close to Erebor. Though you quite liked hearing their joy, laughter, and jokes, you were still overwhelmed. You sought peace and quiet elsewhere, excusing yourself from the table.

Through the window, you could see that it was late at night. There was even a slight hint that the moon was out and shining so beautifully. So without thinking, you left the house entirely and walked out into the empty streets. A cool breeze went by, colder because of the water surrounding the premises, but it had nothing on the cold you were used to in the moutains of Tibet

Just a few meters away was a dock, looking across the lake with a view of Erebor, you imagined. It was hard to tell with how dark the lake and everything beyond it was. You walked out onto the edge of the dock and sat down, leaning back onto your palms. You did not notice that Thorin was following not far behind you, as he had been waiting for a moment like this.

Just a few seconds later, heavy footsteps on the dock approached you. "It's only me," Thorin announced as you had been close to drawing your dagger. You said nothing, only watching him as he sat down next to you. "It's dangerous to be alone in town this late."

"It wouldn't be the first time I've had to defend myself. I am able to do so," you stated, relaxing once again.

"I shall never doubt your skill again. However, I insist that you stay close to the company. We're too close to reaching Erebor to lose a member of the company now." Thorin stared at your face and troubled expression, and while you were still silent, he continued. "I wanted to talk to you. About what you said on the boat." His voice was soft and hesitant. "What happened to your own family?"

He was met with only more silence as you tried to figure out whether you should be honest or wise. The Lin Kuei was very secretive, virtually unknown except by a select few. With courage, you turned your head and looked Thorin in the eyes.

He seemed sincere.

He was a very private person.

He was of good character.

"I will answer your questions, but whatever we discuss must be kept between us in complete confidence." You wanted to be like the dwarves, as open and close as they were. So even though you felt uneasy about revealing your secrets, you thought that perhaps it just took courage to be like them.

Thorin nodded once, slowly, to show that he agreed to your terms.

"I barely knew them," you said in a monotone voice, almost nonchalant. "I have a few faint memories, but that is all. I was taken at too young of an age to remember what my parents looked like. I know I had siblings, but I remember even less about them." You outstretched your legs and sighed.

"Taken?" Thorin asked for clarification. "What do you mean?

"In my clan, the Lin Kuei, children are often born into it, but sometimes they are stolen during childhood or even infancy. Then they are brought to the temple to become acrobats... assassins... fighters and warriors. That is what happened to me."

Thorin had nothing to say, unaware that such a place could even exist. It began to make sense, why you looked at Bard's family with longing and why you confessed to envying Thorin's family. "You are still a part of this... clan? They sound diabolical!" He whisper shouted.

You made no reaction and instead changed the subject. "But... that is why I wanted to help you and your company get back that mountain,"--you motioned to it with the jerk of your head. "Long before I was offered to help on this quest, I entertained the idea of looking for my family. I wanted to know what it was like to have a normal home." You looked into Thorin's eyes, sincerely. "So even though your definition of home is a place and mine is the people, I believe we want the same thing. I will help you get your home, so you may grant your kin normal lives, beginning with your nephews and Gloin's son."

Thorin wanted to thank you, or somehow show his appreciation, but first he needed to know, "Did you not attempt to look for your family?"

A new heaviness itself upon your chest, and you looked away from Thorin. "No," you shook your head, "another member of my clan had attempted to find his family once; he was like me. After a long time, he managed to track them down, but they were killed by a rival clan. Because of the bad blood between us, they may do something similar to mine should I attempt to find them. I don't want to risk my family's life, if they are indeed still alive and well. They don't deserve to lose anyone else."

"You have done much to help us on our quest. Once we have taken back Erebor, I should like to help you reunite with your family." As you looked at Thorin with a shocked expression, he realized it was indeed impulsive of him to promise you help, but you risked your life for his cause, and he endeavored to do the same for you some day.

You smiled for the first time in forever, it felt awkward, but you were touched by Thorin's offer. "Thank you, but that won't be necessary. I'm afraid I wouldn't know what to do with a normal life even if I had the opportunity to have one. After the life I've lived, I don't believe I'd integrate well into civilization." You stood to your feet, wanting the conversation to come to a conclusion. It had been nice to be open, but it was also exhausting.

Thorin quickly stood as well, facing you and taking a step forward. "The odds never seem to be in our favor. There is a dragon in that mountain at this very moment, the same one who burned my home and murdered and drove all my people away--thousands of people! Yet here we are, 15 of us headed to take it back. Are you not willing to fight for your home as you are helping me do now? Even for just the chance of getting it back?" He had such a passion in his eyes, you admired it. But his attempts to inspire you were in vain.

"And if I found my family... what will I do? Live amongst them?" You wore a bitter smirk. "There is no leaving the Lin Kuei. It is punishable by death." And with that, you began heading back to the rest of the company.

Thorins face softened at yet another piece of shocking information. He was not used to accepting defeat so easily. He would find a way to fight for your freedom.

[commanderfreddy]

Olin Anvilcontrolled, age eleven

went back to dwarf fortress classic last night and was rewarded, as i so often am by this game, with a truly vivid portrait of a character (long story under the cut, blood and violence as is typical for df)

Olin Anvilcontrolled arrived at the age of eleven at the Fortress of Savefountain with her mother (Ubbul) and her new stepfather (Sarvesh). Since she was so close to the dwarven age of adulthood, I kept an eye on her to see what kind of skills she developed and what kind of career she'd be suited to. While the rest of her family settled in though, Ubbul soon giving birth to Olin's half-brother, Oddom, Olin had more trouble adjusting. Rather than playing in the corridors of the residential wing or in the temples or taverns with other children, she preferred to follow the web-gatherers and cave-fishers down the long, slippery passage to the under cavern where she would play, alone, with her little glass boat.

The cavern is not exactly the world's most supervised playplace, and I was horrified the first time I received the "A dwarf child has cancelled "play with toy boat: interrupted by Giant Bat" alert. But I needn't have worried. With a value system that prioritised martial strength, power over others, force of will, and - literally, textually - "sadism", eleven-year-old Olin beat the shit out of that huge beast with her bare hands until her mother, a hunter, arrived to put the bloodied and broken thing out of its misery. Being unarmed, untrained and not yet old enough to see a marvel movie unaccompanied, Olin wasn't able to kill it herself, but she was able to hold her own enough to increase her fighting skill to Adequate.

And then to Skilled, when a few days later another Giant Bat came at her.

And then to Proficient when the Olm man came.

Olin kicked so much ass in her one specific corner of the caverns - not too far from the floodgates that led back up to civilisation, not close enough that anyone would bother her on their way to work - she beat enough blood from the underbeasts to form a pool of blood for her to float her little boat in.

She continued to play there even after her stepfather died in those same caverns. Echospittles the Larval Deep of Boils, a Forgotten Beast scuttling in the form of an enormous spider, used its venom and webs to cut a huge swathe of vacancies into my military.

Olin and Sarvesh weren't close, but they had a positive relationship. After his death, she began to very frequently "feel love upon remembering gaining a sibling". I wondered if she could see her stepfather's face in that of her baby brother. I wondered how she felt about the absence of her biological father, Edem Copperdragon, now a position noble elsewhere due to his ceaseless contributions to the war against Otir Toothportal, Necromancer.

Despite her penchant for sadism and violence, Olin did not seem like a very cruel child to me. She highly disdained scheming (poking through Legends reveals that Edem was corrupted by enemy agents multiple times in her early childhood), and openly admired and was genuinely friendly with the two human Monster Hunters who defended her home. I began to understand her as someone who had only ever known a world of violence and war, and was trying to find her place within it. Her avoidance of other children and her determination to return to the same cavern corner and face whatever blind, mad animal was waiting there took on a very sad tone. That of a child on the cusp of adulthood seeking out pain, having mistaken it for glory.

I felt a sense of responsibility for her. Her life as it was seemed like a grand prelude, like she was someone whose narrative belonged in her late years, when she would be 120 years old, Legendary Fighter, Grand Master Leader, and all this was but her backstory. I was determined to ensure I could make her into someone she would want to be. As soon as she was old enough to receive labour orders, I'd put her in a squad of dwarves who would like her - I'd custom build a squad based solely around personalities, just so she wouldn't be a lone again. One of my dwarves was taken by a strange mood, and gifted the resulting legendary helmet to our site government. I earmarked it for Olin, as soon as she was old enough.

Mere weeks before she came of age, the fortress of Safefountain was laid to siege by the forces of Otir Toothportal, Necromancer.

Having been hounded by Forgotten Beasts from below, I had focused the majority of our defences on the cavern entrance, leaving our topside entrance unable to be sealed off entirely just yet. I ordered the floodgates to the caverns sealed nonetheless, hoping to save whoever was down there in the ponds and webs and Olin's little gorespot, while the rest of our dwarves - including Ubbul, with baby Oddom strapped to her back - held the undead at bay.

But as my military inevitably failed and the zombies began to swarm down the gullet of the increasingly poorly named Safefountain, I realised that sealing off the caverns had been in vain. By sheer coincidence, no one had been down there at the time. Not even Olin.

For the first time in her time at Safefountain, Olin was playing in the corridors of the residency wing. With the other children. She, 1-year-old Obok, 10-year-olds Lor and Lobam, 5-year-old Asmel, and Mayor Tosid were the last dwarves left alive.

As the undead surrounded them and the strength of Safefountain was broken, Olin cried out,

"Our time in the Dimensions of Prophecy is so brief!... This does not frighten me."