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kim-ruzek · 4 months

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Review of 11x3

Yes, I am finally doing a review, and it's for the third episode of the season rip to the first two I guess? Also it has taken me all week to write this out despite having notes on it and having it half done ages ago.

First, I'll talk about the Burzek of all it because I'm nothing if not on brand:

I adore their house so much, it's so them.

Their routine 'dance' is so cute. "Stop we're in this together" oh my heart they've grown so much I love it

Burzek texting is so, so cute.

When Adam and Kim was standing so close and cute I nearly died, they're actual cutie pies.

I so so enjoyed and loved Adam looking after Kim. It's such married behaviour. Him trying to encourage her to take a break. And when Adam touched Kim's back oh my heart!

Adam having buddies everywhere helping, I love it so much.

Starting the episode in the kitchen and ending it in it is so good.

When she left through that way she went from mom and family and wife kim to cop kim, and coming back through, after having a rough couple of days, she's once again allowing herself to stop being cop kim and just be in her comfortable family home.

Notable moment being the lunchbox and then her smile at her sleeping family. Adam's smile, Kim telling him to sleep, Adam wanting to hear everything. Adam picking up Mack. All of that.

Now for my general comments on the whole thing:

I love Kim being a spanish speaker. I love hearing her speak it, her voice sounds so so good.

I also liked that Kim did not like the desk sargent's attitude.

I enjoyed the foreshadowing on the green card.

Alvarado going to the toilet right before the shooting happens - something very convenient that I didn't realise at the time.

I loved that Kim immediately clocked the car, then the gun.

I also loved how empathetic Kim was this whole episode.

I do wonder if they're grooming Kim to be the 'main detective' esque character after Hailey leaves.

Kim running point, I love it. She's such a good detective, she deserves to actually be one. She leads the team truly like a true leader. Even clocking when Alvarado is looking up on the computer. And then again talking him down.

Alvarado's frustration - even more clear with that he so wanted him to be the fall guy. He really tried to cover his tracks. If it wasn't for Kim's instincts honestly he would've gotten away with it.

The search for Gabriela is so anxiety inducing, especially when Alvarado shows up.

Talking of which, I love how names are used in this. He is 'Danny' when they see him as one of them, Alvarado when they know he was the perpetrator and I really liked that.

I loved Kim's reaction to the tourniquet being applied wrong, Kim's face at that. The way she said "it wasn't a bystander".

Kim is such a badass. She really has got such confidence, especially in the face of injustice. "You seem to think that would bother me". I loved that line.

I also really love learning about Kim's past.

RE: Kim getting the fake papers, I love how determined to a point of craziness Kim gets, especially on cases she runs/hits close to home.

Sort of off topic but Kim is so pretty <3

Also I loved my protective Kev, the burgwater friendship is so dear to me.

I have to give a special mention to Voight because of this scene: "You been home? You been asleep?" I don't like voight too much, but this season he has really been shining through honestly. That alongside the team knows they can trust Voight, as their Sarge, to bring up their concerns. Also how he checked with her about Alvardo in the first place, he trusts his unit's judgement.

The confrontation scene is one of my favourites. Kim clocking the gun. How she stands. How she lets him talk all while knowing that she's going to arrest him.

And when he tries to turn the table onto her. But when she talks about the diner footage, I love it. Her expression, calm and collected. The way he truly thought she'd let him take the easy way out. "If you make me work for it".

Overall, I really loved this episode. I found it really cohesive and Kim properly shined in it. I still have an issue with the character centricness of these episodes, especially as it's gotten worse again from last season, but Kim definitely did shine.

I do have two issues: although I liked the episode, and the story itself is pretty powerful, it is definitely a Choice to have the latino man be the bad guy. It's a story that needs to be told, but I don't know if this is the place for it when this will be the only immigrant storyline told? Like if they did more on the topic, okay, fine, but yeah, as just the only thing? Not great.

Also the second issue being I would've really loved to see Torres in this episode, and see him and Kim work together or talk about this. And it's just reminded me I really want to see Kim and Torres working together in general, and we should've gotten him in this episode.

Notable Quotes:

"rising tides"

"It's vintage like you"

"THIRD TIME'S A CHARM" - both times

"Got an eye for it"

"i know one [a cop family]"

"nothing" just because i love how Kim says this.

"Kim, you're kinda a walking miracle"

"Adam I used my own money, OUR own money"

"Some cases you'll do whatever you can"

"We bled for it, Kim".

"That feel good?" "Perfect"

#ree has thoughts #ree's reviews #chicago pd #kim burgess #burzek #ree's meta #finally!#right in time for this week too lmao

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a9saga · 1 year

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I started typing this whole thing on mobile and couldn't figure out how to put a break in and I refuse to update the app. Fuck it. You are scrolling past this whole damn thing. Unfollow me. This is all I'm gonna be talking about for the next two weeks.

Exo needs to break up. They have needed to break up. That was my hot take I had been saying I'd eventually share but I never got around to it, and now it's a lot more apparent. Not that I thought this was going to happen. I thought that when I finally posted this, someone might be mad about it, but in wake of CBX's lawsuit I don't think anyone's going to be surprised to hear it.

I was sure exo members were done suing SM entertainment a long time ago. It's been 9 years since Kris and Luhan filed their lawsuits, both of whom won. It's been 8 years since Tao's hiatus, and almost 8 since he filed his lawsuit months later, which he ended up losing despite never rejoining exo. I became a fan of exo during Call Me Baby promotions when Tao was still dancing with a broken leg. I was 15 at the time, about to turn 16. EXO scandals were extremely fresh and ongoing. But those three are so far in the past now. Lay quietly decided not to renew recently, but he hadn't been able to appear with the group for 5 years so, yeah. No surprise. But I really thought it was all done when EXO-M was done for.

Well, I can tell you why I'd been thinking for a while EXO should break up. It's because they're really a thing of the past, and essentially after Love Shot, it felt like there was nowhere to go from there.

That felt like the last breath of their 5 year long prime. Don't get me wrong, it was awesome. EXO have hit after hit after hit, think of the absolute best most addictive song by your favorite pop artist, and EXO have a discography of mostly those. But they haven't grown and changed artistically or commercially as a group. They've been around 11 years, they're in their 30s now, and I don't even think most of them have the heart to revitalize their prime like Super Junior did after their military hiatus was over. Maybe a couple of them have it in them to do the pop star thing for their entire careers, but I didn't think that like, Sehun or Chanyeol were necessarily passionate about creating new music for the rest of their career. Chen has a family now and that's also something I'd like the rest of exo to afford without their huge commercial group getting in the way of that. The only one I felt for sure would not be done anytime soon was Baekhyun. I thought he'd be the new Kangta of the group, sticking around when EXO were dormant and fizzled out. I never thought SM would actually let them break up, like H.O.T did when I was a baby. But yeah, Baekhyun leaving shocks me the most. Not that I blame him. I do fully believe the allegations made in the lawsuit as SM have had such a shady reputation.

Looking at SM's pre-EXO boy groups, one might say EXO were the main successor to Super Junior, because, obviously, both groups debuted with 12 people. Large groups like that weren't really a thing in kpop before Super Junior debuted. Additionally, Han Geng of Suju was one of the first Chinese kpop idols. In 2008, two more Chinese members were added to the sub unit Super Junior-M, which released Mandarin versions of pre-existing and original Korean Super Junior songs. Hm, this sounds familiar. I only just built up a better case for the EXO/SJ argument. Diana and I talk about this sometimes though; I once made an argument that I think EXO was more a successor to TVXQ/DBSK (Tong Vfang Xien Qi/Dong Bang Shin Ki), which I would have forgotten saying if she never brought up that one time i said it ever again.

In July of 2009, JYJ threw the first brick at SM Entertainment I mean TVXQ's members Kim "Hero" Jaejoong, Park "Micky" Yoochun and Kim "Xiah" Junsu filed a lawsuit against SM for contract termination, claiming they had been coerced into slave contracts as minors. They were 22-23 at the time, TVXQ having debuted on December 26th, 2003. The three of them won the lawsuit, signed to C-Jes Entertainment and formed the new group, JYJ, of just the three of them. It was assumed the original five piece was dead by that point, but surprisingly, in 2010, Jung "U-Know" Yunho and Shim "Max" Changmin chose to stay at SM and continue TVXQ as a duo.

This whole thing is arguably the most significant scandal in the 30-year history of SM. TVXQ had been SM's biggest success to date and some argue they and Boa still are. Your faves wouldn't have cracked Japan without the efforts of those two, and if kpop didn't reach Japan in the early 2000s, the entertainment industry in a small East Asian country wouldn't have become huge across the entire planet---and frankly, if TVXQ hadn't been big internationally, they'd have been done for because SM had them blacklisted from Korean television for a decade.

Han Geng of Super Junior actually did file for contract termination shortly after JYJ did, also for mistreatment. As did Luhan, Tao and Kris as we've already acknowledged. But all four of them could move to the entertainment industry in China. Sure, you're always going to lose something by leaving as big a group as EXO, Super Junior or TVXQ, but SM hasn't been sued by its Korean idols since JYJ. Baekhyun, Xiumin and Chen know that they're putting at least as much on the line. And now, like TVXQ, more than half of EXO are no longer in the group, and the majority of the run for the both of them has had this cloud of mistreatment over their reputations. They were also both so unstoppably huge and popular.

I was in elementary school for DB5K's prime, and there were fans of kpop in the west but I can't tell you what their success across Asia looked like as someone who wasn't there. But I can tell you, between 2015-2016 when kpop gradually started to become very big, EXO for a time were bringing in more people to kpop than A Particularly Famous Group in the West I Have No Interest in Naming Because I Don't Want Their Fucking Fans Derailing My Post With Unrelated Discourse While I'm Not Even Talking About Them. Just believe me there was a time when EXO were way more popular in the west than Said Band I Decline to Specify, the eclipse that happened was gradual, and to my understanding EXO continued to be the biggest thing in Asia despite that another one eventually cracked America more and I'm not denying that they did. Point is, EXO coming first was important to all of that, because I and several others wouldnt have heard of the one kpop group if EXO didnt get us all into kpop first from 2013-15/16.

That all said now, this was all very much not how I'd wanted EXO to actually end. This is crashing and burning. Much like TVXQ, EXO is not going to be able to have a reunion after this, because they'll never receive SM's blessing to work together. I mean, EXO-M never would. 12 member EXO hardly lasted for two years though and their prime was very new when people started leaving, so to be honest, I don't know if the kids getting into EXO in the 2020s would really care to see Luhan, Tao, and Someone Sitting In Prison Whose Name I've Uttered More Than I'd Like To.

But in a similar vain, while DB5K originally split into two, JYJ are all off in different directions now. Yoochun was fired. Junsu left C-Jes and made his own label. Jaejoong did the same recently. Could you tell I listen TVXQ? But yeah, now that there are more than 3-4 people departed from EXO, they've got former members going in a lot of different directions. Someone already said it but I hope Xiumin follows Luhan back now. Back in my day Xiuhan were so cute.

Also, since I managed not to slip this into the post anywhere.... these guys have been showing up to work. Every damn day they've been showing up to work, that's another reason why it's so shocking. Chen dropped a song days ago and Baekhyun has been doing shows, posting dance practices, EXO have been appearing together for their 11th anniversary and supposed upcoming comeback. Whaaat a slap in the face. I support CBX 100% though and you should too.

#in this essay i will reveal i know too much about the history of sm ent #also i didnt state this but i think nct were more sj's successor than exo was #the premise of nct was a group w 40 members which as a concept breaks industry norms like sj did #but similarly while suju was meant to be a rotation group of members coming and going that failed #and so did nct's 40 members bc its own fans eventually boycotted the adding of more members which sj did too #thats my last hot take of the post i promise #sorry for the lack of a read more break but i didnt study kpop boy bands as a teen for my work to be overlooked at a time like this #exo #sm #chen #baekhyun #xiumin #kim jongdae #byun baekhyun #kim minseok #exo cbx #shut up kaily #ps i dont want exo to promote as 5 it would suck

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welcometogrouchland · 1 year

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ok a curveball: manny/camila or caleb/evelyn

"curveball" both these couples are canonically married anon /j

Jokes aside BOTH OF THESE SLAP AND ARE HIGHLY UNDERRATED, ESPECIALLY MANNY AND CAMILA!

A for Caleb and Manny: Like, Camila and Manny's nerd4nerd romance is so sweet, so highschool romcom-esque, it's so incredibly fluffy, until you remember that Manny fucking died. Of a terminal illness. And like. You can tell how much Camila loves him by the way his things still litter the house. They are so incredibly sweet and sad to me and tbh as much as I joke about other ships w/ Camila (hiiiii darimila <3) realistically, I know that she is never really going to get over Manny. Not in an unhealthy way, just. He was her first and only love, and the joy he brought to her life is something that only Luz can even come close to replicating (Luz brings joy into her life in a similar but distinct and unique way, btw)

And Caleb and Evelyn...OUGH CALEB AND EVELYN

A+ and they only score higher bc of the weeks following and leading up to thanks to them where I was physically incapable of being normal about them. It was fucked up they had a GRIP on me

I'm much more settled about them now and I'd say that currently they leave me torn. Not on what we actually know- the tragedy of their relationship, the idea that they both represented a form of freedom to the other with their shared cardinal motifs, the way they've massively impacted the narrative and the lives of everyone in it and yet most of the world will never know their names, and yet you wonder if they'd be content with that so long as the couples and heroes of the modern era can be free and happy in a way they never got to be- that's all spectacular. Rich with potential and depth.

It's about what we don't know and whether or not I even want it explored in canon. On the one hand, yes, obviously, I want spin-offs and post-hoots dedicated to unlocking their past and telling us everything about them as people and their dynamic with each other.

On the other hand, I almost prefer the autonomy over their story that the fans have gotten. We don't have the constraints and considerations of the crew so we get to run buckwild! Personally I love the idea of Caleb and Evelyn meeting under false pretences, I love some lies and betrayals and some drama and then some making up and living together and oops! They're boning now! And oops! He's dead now. Literally this is riveting to me.

But the crew only has so many minutes to tell this story in, and has age ratings and audiences to consider. They probably wouldn't be able to give it the nuance and horror it deserves. So I think, in the end, as much as I wanna know what Dana thinks went down, I'm also content to keep exploring them in a mostly fannish context <3

Sorry the witteclaw section is so much bigger than the Nocedas section, they just have a lot more ambiguity to mine. I'll end this by saying though that I would actually sell my soul for on screen Manny content, in any sort of capacity. I NEED to know how he paralleled Luz, and maybe even Eda, how he kept that bright cheery smile we always see him with despite the undoubted hardship and pain he was going through, how proud he'd be of how far Luz and Camila have both come, how happy he'd be at the idea that his families grown with the addition of vee and maybe even hunter, how glad he'd be that his daughter and wife never lost their spark. I have to stop now or else I Will Cry

#ramblings of a lunatic #asks #manny caleb and evelyn are chilling in the afterlife rn. to me

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vaccerelli · 7 months

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this is an execution.

opening eyes in a dark alley with shining surfaces. a homeless man both old and ruined, sits across from me. his few rotted teeth grind against each other as he talks to no one in particular. firing squad? undignified. needles? government penny-pinchers.

I can't feel my hand.

now, beheading? that's perfection, the grimy old man says. he has one eye with a milky cataract and an implant eye that barely glows, spasming and circling the rim of a gaunt eyesocket.

though, in truth, I couldn't feel my hand before I woke up here.

he's still speaking. I've been executed before, he croaks. it was honorable, and glorious.

trying to stand up hurts. trying to move anything hurts besides my arm and hand. my hand and lower arm feel nothing. cold. I can use them, but it feels like someone is pressing my skin against a windowpane in a snowstorm, that early numbness that turns into icicle pain with enough time. I push against the wall and stand up. the old bum mirrors me exactly, never even looking at me. he's stranded in a different alley, in a different time. at the mouth of the alley cars and choppers scream past in smears of indifferent red light. I stumble, and he walks out of the alley into traffic and I don't see him again. maybe it was an execution. death by driving squad. I'm sure he'd find that undignified too. wasn't sure waking up in an alley with aching meat and bone gave me any kind of dignity either.

I looked at my hand. metal fingers fused to iron skin. ugly lump. my fingers move when I tell them to, but I don't feel them move. it's unnatural. it's not an augment or a machine-job. it's a disease, and I've got it. you can tell it wasn't factory-made or grown, there's no serial numbers, no etching, no design. just human flesh transmuting. I'd love to stare at myself longer, but I've got to go. I need a clean shirt without puke and blood, and to get to work.

district station house. desk sergeant is surprised to see me, and a little spooked. my condition isn't contagious, but no one really knows how you get it. I don't know how I got it. I woke up one day with a stiff middle finger. thought it was funny. by the end of the day it had a gray sheen. I hoped for bone cancer, frostbite, coredorsum cell breakdown, anything. I'd rather be a leper. in a week's time, the finger had steel joints and looked like some long-lost part off a construction vehicle. desk sergeant waves me through. I try not to see him wiping down his desk, which I didn't even touch.

maybe I am a leper.

I don't get to my office, or my desk. Agonetti's voice booms from all corners like a deranged preacher. off to his temple. Agonetti is the district supervisor and chief inspector and a whole handful of other titles you get since the corporate cops and military techs folded into one organization. they all get fun titles. I'm have a whole bunch of them myself; my badge says all kinds of useless government things, advanced security, intelligence directive. a specialist, that's my actual skill. investigation, elaboration, interpolation. I was in a teaching program when they yanked me out for the draft. five years in the war I came back and got a job in the integrated services. five years after that and the names on everything change but the job doesn't. couple years after that and we get automaton policemen, security droids, every other damn thing. buildings got taller and wider. city got so big it ate the two nearby cities. I got a little fatter and a lot older. had to start wearing glasses. everyone gave me a bunch of shit I didn't get some kind of ocular implant. told them I didn't need to see.

you're not listening, Anton, he says to me. I know you passed the physio but you don't need to be here.

I'm not listening. I'm staring at the Goodreason building. a knife stabbing into the guts of the gods, it reaches so far into the sky. they've probably got a cure. or they caused this. both maybe. I'm as likely to get into that building as I am to fly to the top by wishing on a star.

you've still got your license. you can still take cases. I don't know why you'd want to.

that's the thing I can't stand. pity. other people's grief. I had my grief, my rage, my acceptance. the synthetic therapy adjunct deemed me capable of grasping and accepting the slow transformation. other people's grief bores and tires me. it's a simulacrum of a feeling. a blank gesture. so sorry. I'm so sorry. sorry. everyone's sorry. it never seems to reach their eyes. they know they're talking to a corpse so they don't expend the actual feelings.

I just want to do something, chief. if I sit around my flat all day feeling sorry for myself, I'll throw myself out the window. I can't do that to sanitation, I know what those guys go through.

you live alone, Anton? got a wife? a husband? a companion?

just me. last girlfriend died during the proxy riots. cat died of old age.

Agonetti chews on this for a moment. he's mostly political, but he served, and for that I can't help but not want to waste his time. none of us came back from the war smooth and untroubled. he reaches into his pocket and pulls out a flick -- a case file on a thindrive -- and throws it across the desk. I catch it neatly in my metal hand. carefully. a lifeline.

no one here wants this one. so if you want it, it's yours.

the office thunders with silence and judgment around us.

the engineplast who looked at my fingers told me it didn't have a formal name yet. the root cause was some undifferentiated nanotransumtation particle, or something like that. it had a bunch of cute names like all awful things do. gear plague. mechavirus. happened mostly to former soldiers but enough to random strangers that it was clear there was something more than just some forgotten biotech weapon at play here. it gets bad enough, they stick you in Ragsdale and move on. Ragsdale is south by the border of the city, near where the Occupation controls everything. tourists call it Metalside. lot of surreal steel statues stuck mid-movement that used to be people. survival rate is point zero five percent, and even then your body has issues processing moving parts. it's not like cyberware or integration or augments. it's a very literal transformation from flesh to machine. veins turn to cables. skin gives way to steel. I say iron and steel and metal but it's a substance akin to all of them but not one in particular. a disease with no name, no origin, and no cure. it's enough to make a machine have religious questions.

there's a situation, my friend tells me over the phone. he's a specialist, like me, but his ears are much closer to the ground. that's why he's going to live to be two hundred and I'm going to die before I finish the last season of the telanovela I like.

the deputy director of the new special intelligence directive is going to meet with you. about your case.

the case I haven't even looked at yet. no wonder no one wanted it.

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ask-feederjin · 2 years

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Jinnie, do you happen to know any other hybrids in the feeding community? Jungkookie and I are looking for some friends~

He suggested that I ask you! Maybe you or your boys know of any?? Thanks a ton ^o3o^

P.s. hope the boys are chubbing up well and are all happy! Do you have an ongoing grocery list of each's favorite snack (or demands hehe) that you have to keep on the fridge and take whenever you go to the store? For some reason the idea of one of your cutie pies demanding their favorite snack be added to the list on the fridge (because they've eaten it all), but are too lazy to want to get up to go to the kitchen and write it themselves is very adorable. Would one of the bigger, lazier boys demand Jimin or Hobi to go add it for them? Hehe.

Lots of love! WolfyJoon ^u.u^

[ @ask-wolf-joon ]

It’s wonderful to talk to you Namjoon! Why, you remind me quite a bit of my own Joonie! Very polite and gentle. I’d love to introduce the two of you some day. :)

Unfortunately I haven’t seen any other hybrids around the website so far. It appears that you’re the only ones at the moment! Although, I’m sure there will be more in the future.

I know that it’s not quite what you were asking for, but there are a couple that I know called @askfeedeetae and @askfeederyoongi from the Sage universe who are another feedee/feeder couple. Maybe you can make friends with them? ^_^

And yes! The boys are chubbing up well. It’s been a hot second since I weighed them though… I should really do that soon! I’ve been too busy running around feeding them!

Do I have a grocery list? Oh you bet I do! I go through them so often that I eventually gave up on grocery store runs myself and have resorted to recurring online orders to handle the intake. We have a “public access” white board where I take requests for the week, if someone wants something they have to come up and add it themselves.

Which isn’t to say that I don’t give in all too often and do it for them. >_>’

Jimin is the most demanding, as he has the most intense cravings, so at least once a day he comes up to me begging for a particular snack or drink. He knows he’s supposed to write it down himself or at least text me like our resident Lazyass Jungkook does. But alas, I give in to his sweet teary eyes all too easily. ;_;

Jungkook and occasionally Yoongi will text Hobi to come over to their rooms, just to ask them to grab them a snack when they know that I’m tied up in something. He’s all too eager to do it, cause he gets to sneak some for himself. ;)

There seems to be a Dom/sub hierarchy among the feedees that’s really developed the longer we’ve been doing this together. I should really do some more observation and make a post about it later. Some have taken to bossing the others around and others have grown a bit more submissive as a result.

It’s been a pleasure watching them grow both physically and mentally over the past months. Seeing their personalities change the fatter they get has been surprisingly the hottest part of it all!

Have you noticed you or Jungkook experiencing a shift in personality, slight or noticeable?

Either way, it’s been lovely answering your questions. Please don’t be a stranger!

Love,

Jin

#lavender//ask #lavender//jin #sunflower//namjoon

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bunnyb34r · 2 years

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Today Gurkle is officially 7 years old! I didnt get to make a post like this for Scupa bc I thought he died when his bday rolled around but he too is 7!!! When I got them I didn't really know what the fuck I was doing but I did so much research into how to take care of these dudes and I'm still just amazed that they've made it this far 😭

(The Party Boys lore under the cut)

Kermit only lived a week with me but he was living in VERY shitty conditions before me and I think the stress of everything just was too much

But I like to think that he had a good last week and that I was able to provide him a place where he felt comfortable enough to pass. Like a crab hospice sgdgdggdgd

Speedy passed on last year during a molt, but he was with me for 6 whole years! He was so little when he came to me and we got him so that Kermit would have a buddy since hermit crabs, despite the name, do not like solitary and need companions

We got Scupa a couple days after Kermit passed, so that Speedy wouldn't be alone. He was SO tiny when I got him and hes grown so much! I like to think that he and Speedy were friends bc they liked to be by each other a lot sgdgdg

Gurkle came to me by suprise! My aunt remembered I had lost Kermit and a whoooole month later was at the pet store and remembered that and picked me up one dggdgdg I was like "oh um... okay... thanks"

Gurkle did NOT like living here at first and he broke out of his tank twice within his first couple weeks. First time he got all the way to our front door! The second my mom found him in our bathroom closet, I think he was like "okay let's try THIS direction" and headed that way. I'm honestly just suprised he made it past the cats and three people sgdgdgdg I didnt even know he was out of the tank!

He since has calmed down and settled. He's been a pretty chill crab, still anxious and afraid of my hand/me coming close to the tank, but he does have moments I call bastard mode™️ where he just gets very energetic and active set on destroying the tank. Most days he just sits there head empty no thoughts (which I call Gurkling when I myself feel like that sgdgdgd)

He and Scupa get along better than they have but they do still have that sibling rivalry and will fight/argue over territory (usually the cup or the front of the tank)

It's been such a joy to watch them grow up and develop personalities, and I'm so lucky that they came into my life and that I've been able to help them get this far in their own lives! Heres to another 7 and many more after that!

#i had to put this under a read more bc it got way longer than i thought shdhdhdh #im just so so proud that they made it this long especially after losing speedy and thought i lost scupa this year as well #seven isnt like a milestone year but it feels like one bc holy shit sgdggdgd #i saw someone on chewy talking ab their 18 year old crab and how he was like family and i was thinking bitch he IS family!!! that is a MAN!#most crabs dont make it to the one year mark bc people think theyre easy/ ''throw away'' pets (horrible fucking term/idea) so im very lucky #to have gotten them this far. they can live up to 30 years in captivity!! thats insane to me sgdggd #i keep considering adding more to the colony but honestly after 7 years it feels kinda wrong to yknow? sgdggdg like heres some strangers #enjoy! plus i dont wanna support the crab trade if i dont have to bc its fucked up how they get taken and treated like if it gets down to #just one i might just so they dont get lonely but idk man idk #anyway!! heres a post of me gushing ab my little guys sgdggdgd #everybody was/is a purple pincher except gurkle who is an equadorian btw!#the party boys #scupa #speedy #gurkle #marquilla #hermit crabs

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accidentalharrie · 2 years

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I've just been waking up processing the interview and skimming through all your asks, and wow it's a lot to take in! I do wonder, do the mean girls keep up with everyone they detest in the way they do with Olivia? Because talk about obsession. It goes way beyond hate, since they stalk her social media (but somehow missed the love cup quote 🤭). Anyways, I block those people if I'm ever unfortunate enough to see one of their posts, but I don't go looking anymore. It's really not good for you, even this last couple of weeks has had a negative effect on me just from following all the "drama".

Anyway, I can't really take any of the nitpicking of her interview seriously because these people are holding onto their hate, jealousy and misogyny a death grip and will view everything she says through that lense lmao. It's just like those people who seem determined to pile onto Harry whenever he moves but a hundred times worse. All i see is self soothing and it's incredibly hilarious to me that they literally cannot cope with the truth - their relationship is strong. I mean they've been convincing themselves they'll break up for nearly 2 years, but especially since Olivia's personal and professional life has been messed with (Jason, Cinemacon, Shia, Florence, Venice). Very ugly of them and they deserve to be in so much distress. Maybe that's not very kind of me but whatever. I liked Olivia from the start, but the past year my respect for her has grown even more and I'm just overjoyed that she's with Harry. I can't imagine being so cruel to someone so important to him, regardless of any personal opinions you may have of her. Of all the people to hate in the world, their focus is Olivia Wilde...

Re: the mean girls/HLTs, I personally enjoy the theory I've seen that they absolutely knew about that tweet and were keeping it quiet.

Re: this week's social media pile-on, the "evidence" was presented so authoritatively by semi-respectable accounts who didn't realize they were parroting misogynistic q-anon lore, so I'm sure the cognitive dissonance will take some time to sink in for a lot of people. Like I said -- I think most are too invested in being #teammissflo, but I do think Olivia took, for herself at least, an important step in setting the record straight.

#hlts #asks

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truly-morgan · 8 months

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[Reigen wears a chastity cage, cue video call sex (18+)]

MobRei | Mob Psycho 100 13-05-2023

[#mobrei, chastity, 2539]

Mob has to go away on a business trip for work, it should take a whole week at the longest. This means he won't be able to be with Reigen for at the very least a couple of days, a week at worse.

So he decides to leave him something that will make Reigen think of him while he's away.

"Arataka, please show me," Mob says to his phone, watching the way Reigen squirm on his end of the video call.

"Why do you always have to be like this" Reigen mumbles, moving around despite it all.

"Because I love you and like watching you" Mob smiles, watching as Reigen props his phone on their bedside table.

Then Reigen is starting to take off his sweatpants, seemingly hesitating when it comes to his boxers. When he finally pulls them down Mob can see the pretty pink cage still locking Reigen's cock away.

"What a good boy, I'll never get over how cute this is on you," Mob says, which only makes Reigen blush in embarrassment at his lover smooth-talking him like this. When had Mob grown this smoothly? Where had his shy and cute little Mob gone, who would blush because he wasn't sure what to do?

Now he would dirty talk to him and make him wear chastity cages.

"Did it make you think about me?" Mob then asked. "Ah, don't hide behind your hand" he warned.

Reigen couldn't do anything with his hand other than hold onto the hem of his shirt, looking away in embarrassment. "... Yes it did, all day".

It had already been two days that he was wearing it and he couldn't stop feeling it, couldn't stop noticing it anytime he needed to use bathroom, shower or change clothes.

He had been scared that people could notice it somehow under his clothes. He would die of embarrassment if anyone knew that he was locked away like this.

It was also frustrating since he couldn't touch himself properly.

it was a bit hard to do with the cage on and all he could do was try to finger himself although it wasn't really as satisfying as having sex with Mob (and he was way too embarrassed to go and try to buy some adult toy).

So yeah, this had made him think of Mob in more than one way and it had only been about two days.

"I'm happy to hear Arataka has been thinking about me so much" Mob commented, "I've been thinking about you a lot too" he then added with a soft smile.

Reigen couldn't win over that smile, all the love and warmth in the young man's eyes. All directed at him and only for him.

he couldn't be mad about being stuck in a cage until he comes back (not that Mob had forced him into it anyway, he wouldn't say it aloud, but he didn't hate it either).

"Has Arataka been touching himself while thinking of me?" Mob then asked, his smile growing more teasing once again.

This had Reigen flustered again, which was an answer of its own. "N-no" he said, thighs closing a bit more tightly.

"Is my usually good boy being bad right now and lying to me?" Mob asked, arching a brow. This had Reigen stubbornly say nothing for a while, thinking it over. Would he receive punishment from Mob if he kept lying to him? He wasn't ready for another edging session like the last one that had been done as a punishment.

"I... I might have tried to use my fingers... the same way you do" Reigen finally admitted. This had Mob humming, leaning back more on the hotel's armchair.

"Why don't you show me how you did it? I'll tell you if you are doing it properly" Mob offered.

Reigen looked back at his phone, looking a bit uncertain. They had done phone sex in the past, but never on a video chat.

Mob doesn't push for more, only offering him a small smile. In everything they've tried over the years, even when it's out of his comfort zone, never has Mob forced him into something. If he really doesn't want to push it farther he won't do it.

But Reigen is already starting to feel aroused from their little talk and he doesn't want to only have Mob's voice, he wants his eyes on him. Plus, it's not like anyone else could see it, nor is Mob recording any of this (he trusts that he wouldn't without his knowledge).

So Reigen moves around in bed, a bit closer to the camera, but also bringing what he needs to be settled comfortably.

Often while of just teasing himself a bit to relax his nerves, he starts, even though he feels a bit shy about it somehow.

He tells himself that it's not different to when Mob is here with him, he's already done that before, put on a little show for his lover. It's just like when he's here with him.

It helps him think so when Mob starts talking to him again, sounding so close because of the earphone stuck in his ears. He listens as his lover gives him instructions, closing his eyes as he follows them, trying to reproduce the kind of touch and caress Mob would normally do. He tries to keep his voice in a little bit, but stops doing so when Mob says he wants to hear him.

After a while he opens his eyes, hearing how heavy Mob is breathing. There's a slight trembling to the camera, Mob looking flushed too, pupil dilated. He can't help but feel aroused at the idea that Mob is masturbating at the sight of the little show he's giving him.

They do this for a while, taking their time, not quite rushing it and enjoying the pleasure of doing this together despite not being with each other. Plus, Reigen does manage to cum properly this time.

He has to leave Mob for a little moment to clean up properly, only to fall back into bed once he's back into his pyjamas, now feeling tired. He holds the phone not too far from him, watching as Mob is also finishing changing for sleep too (he's still not over how muscular Mob has grown over the years, he truly has grown).

When Mob is back Reigen offers him a little smile, "I wish you were here" he finally says after a while, "The bed is empty without my dear boyfriend next to me" he points out.

Mob huff softly at this, "I also miss you," he replies "We are working hard so we can finish more quickly" Mob then adds, "I can't wait for this business travel and project to be over, I want to hold you".

"Don't mess up or it will take longer" Reigen teased him with a laugh.

"Of course, I won't" Mob pouts a little, before yawning.

"You should go to sleep, so you can be a good worker tomorrow" Reigen offers him.

"I still want to be with you for now" Mob replies.

"Then why don't we just chat until one of us falls asleep first, then the other can just end the call" Reigen offers.

This seems good enough for Mob who settles properly into bed. They talk about their day lazily now, up until Mob fall asleep. Reigen can't help but chuckle at the sight of his lover's sleeping face, he had looked pretty tired, and he was clearly working really hard so he could be coming back as soon as possible.

"Good night Mob" Reigen said after simply watching him sleep peacefully for a while, "I love you" he added, ending the call soon after to try and fall asleep too.

Original - AO3

#tweet archive #mp100 #mob psycho 100 #mobrei #reigen arataka #shigeo kageyama #kinktober summer rerun 2023 #chast!ty #chastiti #phone seggs #video call sex #nsft

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lavandevanille · 1 year

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April 12th

APRIL 4TH TODAY

A short update today. It's been about a week since I last harvested my basils and they've already grown taller and very very bushy! A couple days ago I thought ah, they might be ready for a second harvesting this weekend. It's only Wednesday. They might be huge by weekend 🥰

I think I'll try propagate a couple stalks when I harvest this weekend. The thought of having endless basils is so very exciting! 🥰✨

A few hours later...

I lied, today isn't a short update 🤭

I had some energy that I've been really lacking past few days, so I decided to finally repot all my chilli plants!

I actually thought I could just uproot the four larger ones and leave the tiny bird's eye seedlings to continue growing in the plastic container. But I'd waited too long. All the roots were entangled together, so I had no choice but to transplant everything~ I think I ended up accidentally killing a couple of bird's eye seedlings but I still have five good ones, so I'm really not complaining.

They're all a lil droopy and exhausted from the move, but I'm sure they'll all perk right up to how they were by this time tomorrow! 🥰

My lil spot in our outdoor garden is looking really lush and bountiful now 💕

Hopefully, in about 3-4 weeks, I can move a couple more of my insider mint pods outdoors. Maybe even repot the calendula. Poor baby is truly struggling to grow outdoors but its indoors sister is already so huge and majestic.

Even more hours later~

The tallest hyssop plant was starting to fall sideways from being so tall. 🥲 So I went ahead and snipped off a lil cutting and stuck it in a lil cup of water (covered, of course, because again I despise mosquitoes).

I had to pinch off the lowest set of leaves, and it really is only a pinch but I steeped it with some dried lavender buds for a... well it wasn't tea, it was more of lavender infused water really. 🤭 Couldn't smell or taste the hyssop, but it's making me all the more excited for when I can finally harvest more leaves for a proper cup of hyssop tea 🥰

#apartment gardening #plants and herbs #plant mum #basil #lavender #chilli pepper #bird's eye chilli #hyssop #repotting #self-watering pots #hyssop tea #lavender tea #plant cutting

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redwineconversation · 1 year

Text

Discoloration

"It's been a while since I've been gone and away, and I watched your eyes reflect me in a terrible way as you cast your gaze to the flickering hall" Dawn Golden argues in Discoloration. It's kind of how I feel about Lyon's chances tomorrow. So, like. Let's talk about my emo indie Spotify playlist what to expect from Lyon tomorrow.

I miss the old Lyon. I miss them terribly, and I want them back. I miss my vexed, vengeful benefactors, so bloodthirsty, so ruthless. So irate at the thought of being seen as human. I miss them and I want them back.

Will we?

I don't know. And I do know this team very, very well. We've grown up together, or maybe old together, or maybe a bit of both, this team and I. We've been together long enough that I know what their eyes look like, is what I am trying to say. I know what they look like when they enter God Mode, when they're angry, when the thought of being seen as anything other than deities bothers them. I know what that looks like with them and I miss it.

The past couple of weeks, they've been going around saying they're sorry in their own way. There was the win against Zurich. The comeback against Paris FC. The trashing of Dijon (it's hard to imagine it now, but once upon a time, Dijon was the thorn in Lyon's side). They say they're feeling better, that they are becoming themselves again. It's Lyon's version of an apology.

They're not used to having to apologize and they're not used to the Lyon fans being on the back foot, being hesitant about being there for them. When they lost their throne the fans looked at them through gritted teeth and said what mattered was just getting the fucking throne back. Now, the conversation is different. Now the fans are saying they don't know who Lyon is anymore.

I don't think Lyon really knows, either, and that's a large part of the crisis they're going through. They don't know who they are without Ada Hegerberg and they don't know who they are without Griedge M'Bock and they don't know who they are without Ellie Carpenter and they don't know who they are without Amandine Henry and they don't know who they are without Catarina Macario.

They don't know who they are with Marozsan, and I think that's significant, too. At her best, she is a world class player, a proper difference maker. But Lyon hasn't had that version of her since 2019, and they're not exactly sure who she is anymore. I don't think she knows, either, and the scary thing is this sequence of games means Lyon has no choice but see which version of Marozsan has been resurrected. The ghost of 2016-2019 or the one who crashed the Maserati? There's the game against PSG coming up, too. It poses a vital question: is Marozsan capable of being a killer against that team, for reasons we are all aware of?

Lyon's claims of newfound confidence is making me uneasy because for me it echoes what we saw before the humiliating defeat against Arsenal. We were punished for it, and I absolutely do not want to live through that again. I don't want Lyon to be saying they've got this, that they've solved the problems from the past few months.

Because realistically the problems present at the beginning of the season are still there, and even a team like Zurich could take advantage. Lyon still has no proper right back solution and truly seems to have accepted that it simply is what it is at this point. While the midfield is starting to have something that resembles depth, we're entering the game with one (1) DM, and that is a player who hasn't played a full game since October.

Bruun came alive against Zurich and Dijon but the question of whether she can continue that form is still unanswered. I have a lot to say about Malard's past and present form and none of it is positive. Le Sommer's scoring streak is as reliable as my vow to cut back on caffeine.

There are still so, so many problems with this Lyon team. And even if they're saying they're sorry in their own way, even if we are to accept it as true that they are getting their confidence back, even if they are starting to get back to themselves, a fundamental truth remains:

Their eyes haven't changed back yet.

#all good love stories start in the rain #BOY am I pessimistic about our chances tomorrow #and before anyone says I am being paranoid I predicted things going badly against arsenal

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ryouverua · 3 years

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Saimota is a fantastic ship that only improves with age and their respective maturity. Right from the get-go we see this in canon, too! They have a tumultuous first clash at the end of chapter 1 which is immediately turned on its head, and the subsequent growth and development of their in-game relationship really stands out that much more because of it.

This is a long one, so strap in!

Kaito realizes his mistake in his approach after punching him the night before and rectifies it immediately the next morning when he notices Shuichi hasn’t come to breakfast, rightly guessing that he’s stewing in his own grief and misery. And then, being the emotionally intelligent guy he is, he follows up that night and drags him out to exercise (which, y’know, releases endorphins and is scientifically proven to help with mood boosts and even depression) - a move which Shuichi says in chapter 5 saved his life.

A couple days pass and a body drops. Kaito supports him through the investigation knowing that Kaede had been with him last time and that there’s a danger of him relapsing. In the trial, too, Kaito makes every effort to let Shuichi know that he isn’t alone and someone does have his back if he fumbles. This is the real moment that Shuichi chooses to depend on Kaito and is rewarded for it, and while Kaito does get plenty of ego-feed out of it, he believes in Shuichi and his talent wholeheartedly (enough so that it’ll come back to bite him later). But despite it being framed as a ‘hero and sidekick’ relationship, it’s not just for Kaito’s self-worth - it’s to take some of the mental load off of Shuichi, who really, really doesn’t want the pressure of everyone’s lives solely on his shoulders, and is now dealing with the guilt of two cases where uncovering the guilty party hurt him.

(quick chapter 2 interlude! while this is where a lot of the big hero-worship begins for Shuichi and happens to be where I also did his first FTE and got to witness this:

this is also the chapter when these moments happen, post-breakfast and post-casino scene respectively:

and this happens in the very next FTE:

mmm yes, the duality of man. Suffice it to say, while Shuichi has definite rose-coloured glasses on for a lot of the game, Kaito is definitely not an invincible, untouchable hero in his eyes)

Interestingly enough, despite Shuichi still very much leaning into their friendship (and vice versa), they don’t spend a lot of time together in Chapter 3 after he brings Maki out to training that first night! While Chapter 4 is their real ‘break’, Kaito spends a lot of time in his room in the second half while Shuichi gets to know Maki better. And while Maki is a much, uh, meaner investigation partner (love you girl, but that tongue is sharp), they make a great team. Shuichi also starts poking at Kaito’s reason for holing up in his room, incorrectly guess that it’s just related to the occult being brought up. Most importantly, Shuichi is able to do an investigation on his own independent of Kaito just a week after the end of Chapter 1.

Chapter 4 and its immediate aftermath in 5 is great because it showcases Kaito’s flaws and insecurity, and what conflict between the two of them look like. It’s because Kaito respects Shuichi so much that cracks in his own confidence start appearing - and while Shuichi can be obtuse and awkward at times, he shows signs of wanting to broach some more sensitive topics with Kaito; if you do FTEs with Kaito in Ch 4, he even has an inner narrative in which he notes that Kaito had said his stomach hurt before.

He’s not so self-absorbed as to not worry about his friend (but narratively we gotta save that juicy plot point and subsequent reveal for the end of the trial) but hey, Kaito wants to chill and just shoot the shit - so why not have some downtime with his friend in the murder school. Btw, their FTE availability ends here - so if Shuichi has completed them with Kaito, he’s already had his canon-saimota thoughts at this point. While I have given Shuichi the side-eye for his ‘I can rely on Kaito for anything’ spiel, he is fully able and willing to stand up to Kaito in the Chapter 4 trial despite his canon feelings for him at that point. By the way, it’s been a week and a half since the end of Chapter 1 at this point. Shuichi and Kaito have had an arc together where they become fast friends in a pressure-cooker situation and bonding over shared grief for Kaede (even if Kaito’s is less obvious), Shuichi starts as dependent on Kaito’s emotional support but learns to stand on his own two feet, and Kaito is forced to confront his own weakness and hero persona, all while classmates are dropping (including Kaito’s own ex-hero figure, a stark reminder that ‘heroes’ do have flaws).

So the beginning of Chapter 5 is wild to me because of how it’s so often misinterpreted as Kaito immaturely giving Shuichi the silent treatment despite the entirety of the game preceding it explicitly showing that Kaito will tell you, loudly, when he’s angry at you, and that’s purely because we’re in Shuichi’s perspective and he thinks that’s what’s going on - but that’s a bit of a tangent. What I like about it is how we get to see what happens when Kaito (as sick as he is at that point) feels badly and embarrassed with someone he is close to; he withdraws as opposed to lashing out. And while Shuichi is really, really bad at reaching out too without an inciting incident (tunnel escape), he does try and broach the topic when push comes to shove. He’s not lost in hero worship, not even close - he is rightfully upset that the person he’s closest to at the school is upset while still maintaining to himself and the others that his actions were correct. He doesn’t waver on this, despite his attempt to offer an olive branch at the window of the hangar’s bathroom. He truly stands by his own choices in the last class trial and know he won't back down on that if push comes to shove, and that's important - he won't yield the point just to appease Kaito. Shuichi then manages the investigation on his own, leads the trial on his own, faces off with Maki (and who he thinks is Kokichi) on his own, because he has *reached* a point where he can be independent. And to bring it back to how we get a look at ‘saimota in conflict’, Shuichi and Kaito both make amends with each other by the end of the chapter. Even if it’s spurred by it being their final goodbye, Shuichi gets to say his piece, Kaito lays out one of his own vulnerabilities so he can make peace with Shuichi - and even if I’d love to have had them delve into all of Kaito's various issues, there is a very murderous robobear overseeing this which makes time a factor - and I firmly believe that if they had more time, they could’ve resolved even more of the issues that would come up for Saimota. The groundwork wasn’t just there; there was already half the structure in place. And that’s what makes saimota even more appealing to me, tbh. We get to see them build a relationship, run into a big issue, struggle through it and resolve it by the end of the game - and it means that there’s precedent for them to do it again as more interpersonal challenges come up! It’s a goldmine of ship exploration, and they care about each other enough to work through it.

… By the way, at this point they are 2 weeks past the end of Chapter 1.

Imagine if they had more time. Imagine if Shuichi, who is absolutely dogged in pursuing an issue once he catches wind of it (despite how he can get wrapped up in his own head), who cares a lot for other people, who doesn’t just find runaways as part of his detective talent, but follows up with them after because he cares about more than just finishing the job, had the chance to spend years with Kaito and realize he uses his hero persona to protect a much more fragile sense of self. Imagine Shuichi forming that initial friendship with Kaito without the albatross of Kaede’s death hanging around his neck; about how he’ll still look up to Kaito and his fantastic positivity, passion and excellence in his chosen field, and that would only be matched by Kaito’s own admiration of Shuichi’s skills as a detective. Imagine if Kaito, who repeatedly shows the ability to reflect and change his mind when presented with evidence against his viewpoint and was able to express his own insecurity and jealousy to Shuichi in the end, was given the breathing room and space to get more comfortable with doing so. Imagine how difficult and emotionally mature they were to navigate as well as they did in a life-or-death situation that took place over a couple of weeks tops, and how much more they could grow if given the time and space for it.

... And this was nearly going to be where I ended the post, until Ira reminded me of TDP and sent me this wonderful Saimota event (which takes place before the final graduation/training trio event):

Oh hey, Shuichi picked up his catchphrase! It's quite cute how he's finishing Kaito's sentence here - he's spent a couple of years being friends with Kaito at this point, and has even taken up exercising on his own for stress relief. I wonder whose influence that was?

Anyway -

Shuichi has figured out at this point that he does need to firmly extend that helping hand to Kaito rather than worry and keep it to himself. On the other side, Kaito has learned that it is okay to accept that outstretched hand, even if he doesn't need it right now - that he can admit that some day, he might. He's being blase, sure, but it is a far cry from his in-game 'I don't/won't need help'. Good for you, Kaito - you've grown a lot! And that's the most important thing their TDPs show - their capacity for growth not just as individuals, but in a relationship. Of course there will be bumps along the way - it’s very rare that any relationship won’t have them! - but they've proven that they can work these problems in the worst of circumstances. This is by far one of the strongest ships with canon foundation in the entire series, and my goodness do I still love it years later.

#saimota #Kaito Momota #momosai #Shuichi Saihara #Danganronpa v3 #spoilers #drv3 spoilers #saimota.... is good #long drv3 posts in 2021? it's more likely than you think

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peterrparrkerr · 3 years

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Hit mad falls in love with target - read on ao3

*-*

Peter waved frantically at Tony when he walked into the lab, eyes glued to a computer screen.

"Tony, quick! Look!" He demanded, nearly vibrating in his chair.

Tony made his way over, hands clasped behind his back as he leaned over Peter's shoulder.

"Isn't it awesome?" The young man asked, waving his hands around.

"What am I looking at?" Tony asked.

"Its cancer," Peter said. He points to different colored lines in the graph, all jagged and fluctuating. "This is breast cancer, and this one is pancreatic, skin, lung."

Tony hums as Peter continues to list each colored line as a different form of cancer.

"I was able to isolate the individual cells from everything else, and- look, look!"

Peter snatches Tony by the shirt sleeve and tugs him from one monitor to the one on the other side of the lab. He taps his fingers on the screen, bouncing on his heels.

"These are the cells after being treated with non-radioactive therapy," Peter said, looking up at Tony. "The number of cancer cells is cut in half within a week!"

Peter then drags Tony across the lab again, babbling excitedly as he does so. "Do you know what this means? This means we can start human testing! And we can market the treatment for practically nothing!"

He shows Tony a live feed of the treatment in action from a TV monitor.

"Think about the possibilities," Peter grinned. "Anyone can get treated, no matter their financial standing. And the treatment isn't as harmful as chemo or radiation. It doesn't attack the body as a whole, it isolates the cancer cells and leaves the rest of the body alone.

"No more hair loss or side effects. And we could cut remission in half too," Peter said. "Just think, this time next year, we could start selling to hospitals all over the world."

Tony smiles down at the younger man. He had known within the first day of meeting Peter that he wouldn't be able to follow through. He's glad he hadn't.

"Have you told anybody else?" He asks casually.

"Ned knows," Peter said. "And Bruce, but they were here when it happened."

"Where are they now?"

Peter gives Tony a wry smile, still too excited about his treatment working.

"I sent them home a couple hours ago," he said. "We've all been awake for almost three days, so I'm sure they've gone to bed already."

"You should be in bed too, don't you think?" Tony asked, raising an eyebrow.

Peter waves him off, shaking his head as he goes to his work desk. "I'll sleep later," he said, pulling his lab coat off and draping it over the chair.

He's dressed in his usual outfit; comfortable pants and a button up.

"Plus, I knew you'd make your rounds around this time, and I wanted to tell you," Peter said with a grin, grabbing his personal items.

That was part of Tony's cover. A janitor for the building Peter worked for. Hes wearing a navy blue jump suit, though he's left the cart out in the hallway.

"I'll walk you to your car," Tony hums, leading the way out. When he'd first started this, he'd offered his company to get closer to Peter -to find his vulnerabilities.

Now though, he does it because he's protecting the young scientist.

He'd skipped out with 45 thousand dollars paid to kill the boy, but as the days had gone on, and Peter had grown comfortable with him, Tony realized he couldn't steal him from the world.

Peter was incredible. He worked tirelessly to find a cure for cancer. He's already created a new insulin for diabetes that he's made available to everyone for only $10 a month -something not many other medical professionals liked.

Peter was making enemies left and right, and Tony decided to make it his job to keep him breathing. If not for the rest of his life, then for as long as it takes for the young scientist to see an end to cancer.

The boy wasn't getting much in terms of money for his creations. In fact, from what Tony's come to learn, the boy doesn't own a car, and rents an apartment with his aunt.

He sees enough to live paycheck to paycheck and this new treatment won't do much to better his life, but he's not concerned with money. He wants to make Healthcare more effective and affordable.

Tony's got morals. Enough of them to know when a hit is a bad investment. That didn't stop him from taking his payment anyway.

The two make it to the car park. Its dark, the overhead lights buzzing annoyingly. Its empty, save for a couple cars belonging to a few of the security guards, and the car Peter shares with his aunt.

It's an older model, grey paint chipping and metal beneath rusting near the wheels. Peter talks animatedly beside him, lands flailing in front of him.

Tony glances around them, scowling as he takes in the familiar cement structure.

"Wait," Tony says, just as Peter's pulling the keys from his pocket. They're a couple feet away from the car, and the hairs on Tony's arms and neck stand on end.

"What is it?" Peter asked curiously, reaching for the door handle.

It's just as Peter grips the handle that Tony sees the wire connected to the metal lock on the other side of the glass.

Tony is quick to react, grabbing Peter by the arms and wrenching him away from the door.

Peter yelps in surprise, but its cut out by the sound of a small explosion. Tony braces for the blast of air that knocks the two off their feet, and grits his teeth at the heat that follows.

Peter's pressed against the cement, Tony weighing down on him. His ears ring, but he quickly gets to his feet, unzipping his jumpsuit and grabbing the .9 mm from the waistband of his jeans.

The car is ablaze, crackle-popping and sizzling. Its just the cab thats on fire, but Tony knows its only a matter of seconds before the flames reach the engine and the fuel line.

Tony looks around him, trying to find the culprit -though he knows from experience that the man won't be here.

He grabs Peter by the armpits and pulls him to his feet. Blood smears against his forehead and jaw. His hands and arms are scraped up and Tony can tell his knees are busted too, but it doesn't look like anything damaging.

"We gotta go," Tony urges, already half dragging the younger back towards the building.

"You-you have a gun," Peter gapes, stumbling after Tony, arm in the older's hard grip. "Why do you have a gun?"

Tony reaches the door for the stairwell.

"I'm a hired gun," Tony said, glancing up, then down, gun following his eyeline before pushing Peter towards the stairs going up.

"I thought you were a janitor," Peter gasped, climbing the stairs and swaying. Tony places his free hand on Peter's lower back.

"Thats just a front," Tony confessed. "We got to get you out of here."

"Someone blew up my car," Peter said, panting as they continue up to the first floor. "Aunt May is gonna kill me."

"Not if Buck doesn't kill you first," Tony grunted, pulling Peter out of the stairwell and into the main lobby.

Tony's car is around the side of the building, but its open to attack. Tony can't keep Peter trapped inside the building though, so he risks it.

Their feet slap loudly on the asphalt as they run for the nondescript black SUV Tony had taken to driving.

He checks around the vehicle, under and inside before issuing Peter into the back seat.

Tires screech as Tony peels out of the parking lot.

"What- whats happening? Tony, what- why do-"

"Someones trying to kill you, Peter," Tony said, blowing past the guard tower at the exit of the parking lot.

"But why?" Peter asked dumbly, voice slurring slightly as more blood turns the side of his face crimson.

"I'll answer all your questions when we're safe," Tony promised, eyes frantically shifting from the area ahead of him to the rear view mirror.

Peter must really be feeling the effects of his head slamming into the concrete, because he doesn't protest.

"Lay down," Tony orders, merging into traffic and slowing down. "Lay low until I say."

Peter does -Tony thinks mostly because of his head injury. Tony relaxes a little, knowing the scientist won't be gunned down in the back seat.

"Where are you taking me?"

"Somewhere safe," Tony answered, keeping an eye behind him.

He doesn't see a tail, but he takes a round-about way to his safe house, just outside of Queens.

When they get to the small cabin, Tony checks the building before helping Peter inside.

"I think I have a concussion," Peter mumbles, swaying on his feet as Tony guides him to the kitchen chair.

"I don't doubt it," Tony agrees, setting his gun down on the table beside Peter's elbow before grabbing the first aid kit.

He pulls another chair over in front of the young scientist and opens the red box.

"Let me see your hands," Tony orders. Peter does, palms up. Tony begins to clean them and his arms.

"Tony," Peter says, breaking the silence. Tony doesn't say anything. He reaches up to clean the blood from the side of Peter's cheek.

"Is your name actually Tony?"

Tony makes eye contact before nodding.

"And you're a hired gun?" Peter asks, slightly breathless. "Like, like a hitman?"

"Yes," Tony answers, reaching the cut on Peter's hairline. Peter winces, but doesn't pull away.

"You kill people for a living?"

"Yes."

It takes Peter a couple seconds, but it seems to hit him. Hes bolting to his feet, the chair clattering behind him.

Tony leans back into the chair, watching as Peter begins to pace.

"What- Tony, you have to tell me whats going on," Peter demands, hand on his head. Tony knows from experience that pacing tends to help the scientist expell excess energy.

"I will," Tony nods. Peter continues his pacing. Back and forth beside the kitchen counter.

"Why- why are people trying to kill me?" He demanded. "Who blew up my car?"

Tony sets the paper towels down on the table, knowing Peter won't sit still for him to properly tend to him.

"The one who blew up your car is another hitman," Tony said. "Goes by the name Winter Soldier."

"You called him Buck," Peter said, pointing an accusatory finger at Tony, eyes narrowed.

"I did," Tony nodded. "Hitmen tend to run in the same circles, though we don't always like each other. Bucky was probably hired to finish the job."

"Finish the job," Peter repeated dumbly. "I'm the job?"

Tony nods, once more letting Peter process. He knew Peter would figure it out without Tony's help. He was smart.

"Finish the job means someone already tried to- to kill me," Peter said, panting as he continued to pace. The wound at his hairline is bleeding sluggishly, dripping down his temple and towards his jaw.

Peter wipes at it without thought, smearing blood against his cheek. He pauses to look down at his hand, fingers glistening in red.

He touches his forehead again, as if remembering he's still injured, then turns to Tony, accusation and fear in his Bambi brown eyes.

"You," he said softly, in disbelief. "You were hired to kill me, weren't you."

"I was," Tony nodded.

"But you haven't," Peter said. Tony can practically see the gears turning behind his eyes. "And, and now whoever hired you hired the Winter Soldier."

Tony only nods. Peter takes a shuddering inhale and has to grip the counter with a bloody hand to stabilize himself.

"I'm- I'm- who- who would want to-to kill me?!"

"The payment was anonymous," Tony said. "Thats how it works. But whoever it is is threatened by you."

Peter looks at Tony incredulously. "Me? Why me? I'm the least threatening person -like- ever!"

"You've cost Big Pharma millions with your insulin," Tony said. "You've patented it, so they can't take it and upcharge the way they've been doing. And if your treatment for cancer is a success, you'd be costing them even more."

Peter takes a moment to process that before he nods. "Right, yeah. I knew I was going to make a lot of people mad about that, but. But I never expected anyone to actually try to kill me."

"Money is a powerful motive," Tony said, a little too much experience leaking into his tone.

Peter hears it, because he stops his pacing, shoulders dropping. Exhaustion seems to pull him towards the floor like an anvil tied to his spine.

He sways a little, and Tony's about to offer him the chair again, but he moves to it willingly. When he sits, their knees are barely touching, and he blinks dazedly at his bloody hand.

Tony grabs a clean rag and leans forward to clean up the blood from Peter's head. The younger lets him, still processing and no doubt sluggish from the concussion.

"Why didn't you?" Peter asked after Tony had taped gauze to his hairline. It was patchy and poorly done, but it would help.

"Why didn't I what," Tony hummed, using an alcoholic wet wipe to clean the remaining blood from Peter's hands. The boy winces at the burn to his scraped palms.

"Kill me," he said, swallowing thickly. "You had plenty of opportunity."

Tony sighed, setting the wipes down before leaning forward and looking Peter in the eye.

"Because I believe in the work you're doing," he said honestly. "And I'm going to make sure you finish it."

Peter blinks once, twice, before breaking eye contact and sighing, body eating to melt into the chair as the air leaves his lungs.

"Come on," Tony said, standing up and slipping the gun into the waistband of his pants. Then offering his hand. "This place is safe. Theres a bed you can sleep in."

"I shouldn't sleep with a concussion," Peter said weakly, taking Tony's offered hand anyway.

"Its mild, I'm sure you'll be fine," Tony mused, heading deeper into the cabin to the bedroom.

The bedroom isn't anything special. A twin bed in the corner, a four drawer dresser and a blackout curtain.

Peter climbs onto the bed, not bothering with the covers or taking his shoes off. Tony thinks its best he sleep with them on anyway, in case Bucky finds them.

Tony moves to leave, grabbing the handle, and Peter bolts upright again, eyes wide.

"You're okay," Tony promises. "I'll be right outside."

Peter gives the barest shake of his head. "Stay here, please," he says softly.

Tony nods, shutting the door and turning off the light before making his way to the side of the bed. Theres an old step stool there, and he sits down at the head of the bed.

Peter lays back down, body too tense to ever fall asleep. Tony keeps his ears attuned to any noise that could alert him to Bucky, or anyone else, gun sitting perfectly stop on his knee, finger off the trigger, but ready at a moments notice.

"Tony?"

"Yes, Peter."

Peter shuffles around, and Tony turns his head just in time to feel pillow soft lips connect with the corner of his mouth.

He can't help but smirk as Peter settles back down. "Thanks for not killing me."

Tony chuckles at that, leaning his head against the wall. "I may be a hitman, but I've got morals," he says into the dark room. "Besides, nobody likes cancer."

Peter laughs tiredly at that before reaching his hand out and grabbing Tony's. Their fingers interlock, and Tony doesn't really know which one of them initiated it.

"You're going to be okay," Tony continued. "I wont let anyone hurt you. You're safe with me."

"I know."

#marvel #tony stark #peter parker #ironman #starker #spiderman #my writing #ao3 #sfsummerbingo21

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thoushallnotfall · 3 years

Text

God Bless the Children of the Beast - Part 14

Previous // Masterlist

Pairing: The Dirt!Tommy Lee x Reader

Word Count: 4.2k

Notes: *shows up 3 months late with a bottle of Jake* So...what's up?

So so so so SO sorry I just dropped of the planet there for months my guys; I swear I've had the first part of this started since like, the beginning of November, and it's just been sitting in my drafts collecting dust.

I went and reread the whole fic in prep for writing this and it was actually really fun? Like, I forgot everything the MC has gone through. (god what a rollercoaster) She and the boys have really been through it huh? They've grown so much; my babies. 🥺 I have felt so bad that this has just been sitting here unfinished; I never wanted to abandon it, and I am determined to finish this even if it kills me! I love this story so much, I have to see it through to the end.

This chapter has a lot of conversations without having dialogue which normally bugs me but it's already such a long chapter and I'm tired. Also, it's purely cheese and fluffy good feelings because I feel like we deserve that don't we? (And I mean y'all have been waiting forever; you deserve something nice.)

Warnings: None

1993

After Heather had kicked him out, Tommy moved into your guest room. He promised it wouldn’t be for long–a few weeks, maybe a month–and then he'd be out. You told him from the beginning he could stay as long as he wanted, but you knew he was ashamed of his current situation. He wanted to get a new house as soon as possible so he could pretend everything was fine. It wasn’t, of course; but the thought of you or anyone else pitying him absolutely killed Tommy, and you knew it.

Tommy was completely broken up about his divorce, and as much as he may be embarrassed about having to crash at someone else’s house, you could tell he also craved the company. If you were both home together–and you usually were–you began to notice Tommy gravitating to whatever part of the house you were in. Even if he was doing his own thing, he just wanted to be around you. You knew he didn’t want to be alone–alone with this thoughts, his feelings; thinking about why he was alone and replaying it all in his head. That’s why you were so insistent that he could stay; you didn’t want him to have to go through this alone.

At first he was adamant about finding a place as soon as possible, but after the first couple weeks he went out looking at houses less. Then, after another few weeks he just stopped looking altogether. You didn’t bring it up–knowing any mention of it would force him to start his search up again, even if that’s not really what he wanted–and the two of you silently acknowledged he would be staying for awhile, which is what you’d wanted from the start.

You knew Tommy enjoyed living with you, and even though it had been over a decade since the two of you had shared a space, you fell back into it with ease. Your house was much bigger than the shabby little apartment you once cohabitated in with the others, but with Tommy always trying to be in your orbit it felt just as close.

You made a point to try and hang out with him even more than usual; which was easy with him living with you. You would have Nikki and Mick over and the four of you would hang out–the sobriety of the Dr. Feelgood tour was back as the boys worked on their next album, but it was always a good time when you all got together, even without the booze. Then, there were the nights the two of you spend alone. Usually, you’d end up watching a movie or playing Nintendo together, simply enjoying each other's company like you always did.

Sometimes you would just hang out and talk; you’d talk about the past and how young and stupid you all had been. Then you’d say you couldn’t believe it’d been 12 years since the two of you had met.

You’d been thinking about that a lot since Tommy moved in–it had been 12 years since you’d met him and the others; 12 years since Motley Crue was formed. You’d think about all the shit you’d done, all the things you regretted, all the moments you’d die to relive. You'd wonder where your life would be now if you and Nikki hadn’t met Tommy that night in the diner.

You didn’t want to know where you'd be right now without him.

Tommy always had such a sweet look on his face when he talked about the past with you. It wasn’t like in rehab; when you had to drudge up the shit from your past that you hated and lay it all out in a row for everyone to see. It was softer than that; a gentle nostalgia about your lives together. Yeah, you did some stupid shit, but you did it together.

And so the days turned to weeks, and those past until Tommy had been living with you for nearly four months. You thought he might go through with leaving after the first month; then he got the divorce papers from Heather, and all the work you’d started to help put him back together was undone in an instant. Your heart ached seeing him so miserable, and you knew no matter how long it took you would help him get through this.

And he did improve, with time, and the longer he was with you the more you began to realize you didn’t want him to leave. You knew one day he would have to move out, but whether for his sake or for yours, you hoped that day wouldn’t come any time soon.

—

December 25th, 1993

You look up at the green suburban home in front of you, with it's festive decorations placed meticulously around the expertly kept lawn, and you felt a sense of panic well up inside you. You knew this would be good for Tommy–and it had sounded like fun at first–but now that you were here you just felt wrong. Like you didn't belong–something that was clearly out of place in a world that was otherwise perfectly organized.

It was an old feeling, one you hadn't experienced in a long, long time; and you wondered why you were suddenly feeling it again now. You had been living in mansions and staying in ritzy hotels for years: suburbia should be nothing to you now. Yet here you were, palms sweating and stomach in knots, feeling like an outcast again for the first time in years.

You thought back to when you were younger; imagining the different world Tommy came from and how you used to think it somehow separated him from you. But now that you were here in person looking up at Tommy's childhood home, you knew it wasn't true–not anymore at least.

You and Tommy may have started out worlds apart, but you grew closer with each day you spent together–every stupid decision, every victory, every mistake, and every heartache along the way–the two of you moved closer and closer with every step you took until you ended up side by side.

He wasn't the sweet, naïve boy you first meet that night 12 years ago, just like you weren't that lonely, jaded girl. You'd both grown and changed–for better and for worse–and you'd done it together. You weren't from two separate worlds now; you'd made your own world, with Nikki, and Mick, and Vince. The five of you carved out a place for yourselves where you could all live together; where you made the rules and no one could judge you.

Maybe that's why you felt so wrong now; you were stepping back into Tommy's old world. This was his life before you–before Motley Crue–and it made you feel like you did when you were a teenager. Before Motley Crue you could never walk into a suburban neighborhood like this without people giving you looks or asking you what your business there was; they might even go so far as to call the cops on you.

But here you were; not a teenager looking to start trouble in suburbia, but an adult, invited for Christmas at your best friend's house–well, his parent's house anyway. Normally, you'd spend Christmas with Nikki and his family, but when Tommy had asked you to come home with him how could you say no? He needed you now, and admittedly when he'd asked you part of you had just really wanted to say yes.

After all, you liked Tommy's parents–the few times you'd met them they'd been so kind to you, always treating you with consideration and warmth, even if you felt like you didn't always deserve it. Then there was the fact that you didn't just invite anyone home with you for the holidays. You knew you were reaching–seeing what you wanted to see–but you were slowly finding it harder and harder to suppress your feelings for Tommy after these months living so close together, and even the little things were starting to look like signs to you.

So when he asked you to come with him all you could think about was how it looked. How this was something couples did: going home to meet the parents over the holidays. It was ridiculous and selfish; you were his best friend, you already knew his parents, it wasn't anything more than Tommy reaching out to you because this was his first Christmas without Heather in nearly seven years and he didn't want to go through it alone.

But still, you couldn't help but wish it was more.

—

You walk up to the house, a pile of presents balanced in your arms. Maybe you had gone a little overboard, but you couldn't help yourself; of course you wanted to get gifts for his parents, how could you not? Tommy looks over at you and laughs.

"Dude, you think you bought enough?" He asks, smirking at you.

"Shut up; you have no room to talk." You say, nodding at his own arms full of presents.

"Yeah, but they're my parents. You didn't have to get them anything." He replies.

"I know, but I wanted to." You say, adjusting the gifts in your arms as you feel your stomach doing somersaults the closer you got to the house.

What if they didn't like the presents? What if they didn't approve of Tommy living with you? What if they wanted him to come home?

You're worries were instantly washed away as soon as you got in the house. Tommy's dad had opened the door for you, and it wasn't even a minute before his mother was on you both; all smiles as she greeted you and told you how happy she was to have you. You could feel your cheeks warm as she doted on you, ushering you in and attempting to take the presents from you. You insist you can carry them, following Tommy into the living room to put them under the tree which was already surrounded by a sea of presents.

"Come on guys, I told you you didn't have to get us anything." Tommy said as he sat down his presents.

"Of course we did; how could we not get you presents on Christmas?" How mom replied, smiling at you both.

"You know your mother Tom; she loves giving presents. Better just to smile and accept them." His dad said, putting his arm around his wife. As you set your own stack of presents down, you saw at least a few presents with your name on them and smiled to yourself. You felt bad that Tommy's parents got you anything, but you couldn't help feeling secretly happy about it too.

"You really didn't have to get me anything." You say quietly.

"We wanted to; we were so happy when Tommy told us you were coming." His mother replied, smiling brightly at you. "Now, why don't we have some lunch? I'm sure you're both hungry from your trip."

She practically pushed the two of you into the dinning room. You sat next to Tommy as his mother dished out a nice, light lunch for all of you. You ate and chatted and any lingering fear about what his parents thought of your current situation was completely dispelled.

"We were so relieved when Tommy told us he was going to be staying with you." His mother says as she looks over at you from across the table. "We knew he'd be alright with you looking after him."

"Aw come on mom, do you have to say things like that?" Tommy groans, clearly embarrassed.

"You're mother's right Tom; with how well she's looked out for you and the band all these years, we couldn't help but feel relieved knowing you were in such good hands." His dad replies.

"Still, you don't have to say it like that." Tommy says, still pouting.

"I hope you've thanked y/n for all she's done for you–you're helping her out aren't you?" His mother asks, raising an eyebrow at her son.

"Ugh, yes mom." Tommy answers, and you can't help but laugh under your breath. You loved watching Tommy interact with his parents; despites being a grown man and an actual rockstar, they still treat him like he's a teenager. Of course, it was all done out of love; but it was still funny.

—

After you spent a little more time talking, the four of you move into the living room to open presents. You hadn't really been quite sure what to get them–you'd never bought anyone's parents presents before, and it's not like you knew them that well–so you tried to play it safe and just buy them practical things, or things Tommy told you they'd like. You got his father some nice tools, some cologne, and a nice watch. You got his mother some books, some nice perfume, and a gold bracelet. They both thanked you profusely, saying of course that you shouldn't have and that the gifts were far too expensive, but you insisted that it was fine. In return they got you a Greek cookbook and a few nice photo albums–both things you had mentioned to Tommy about wanting.

You and Tommy had agreed not to get each other anything this year; neither of you actually needed anything, and if you wanted something either of you could just buy it. Normally you would still have exchanged something, but with Tommy still living with you he was adamant that you not buy him anything; you were already giving him enough by letting him stay with you. You had wanted to protest, but you didn't want to push him either, so you just let it go.

—

You spend more time hanging out with Tommy and his parents, talking and joking and to your joy and amusement looking through photo albums, until it was already time for dinner. You all moved back into the dining room and his mother brought out the large dinner she had been working on. You offered to help, but she wouldn't have it; insisting guests should relax, not helping with the meal.

You did find yourself alone with her after the meal was through. Tommy and his father had gone into the living room, and you stayed behind to help her clean up. She hadn't wanted you to help, but you insisted, and she finally relented. While you were helping her wash dishes, she looked over at you and smiled.

"We are very grateful for how you've looked after Tommy." She says as she hands you a plate to dry.

"Oh, it's no problem; it's actually kind of nice having someone else in the house." You reply sheepishly, playing it off as you dry the plate and put it away.

"Not just these last few months–you've always been such a good friend to Tommy, always looking out for him and helping him. Who knows where he would be now without you." She insists. You feel your face flush as you keep your eyes on your task.

"It's really not that big of a deal–and Tommy's looked out for me too. He's been there for me more than anyone–even more than Nikki at times. I owe him a lot." You reply, glancing over at her. She's smiling warmly at you.

"You care about Tommy very much, don't you?" She made it sound like a statement rather than a question.

"Of course, he's my best friend." You answer. She gives you a knowing look, and you look away again.

"Don't worry; one day he will see what's most important to him." She says, her words were vague but the meaning was obvious to you. You didn't try to deny it; you just kept on drying dishes in silence, Tommy's mother still smiling to herself.

—

You stayed for a little longer until it began to get dark and the two of you decided you'd better leave. His parents gave you both hugs as you left–his mother even giving you a quick kiss on the cheek–before the two of you were back on the road, heading for home.

In the car you listened to the radio and talked about the day. Tommy was grateful you'd come, though he wouldn't say the real reason why. You knew he was ashamed of his divorce even now, and going to his parents without Heather was still hard for him. You didn't mind, and assured him you'd had a good time.

When you get back to LA it's late, but Tommy insists on going to grab some food. You're tired, but agree; somehow hungry even after the large dinner you'd had hours before. Tommy drives pretty far out of the way, and you wonder where he's taking you, until you're on the strip; parked in front of a familiar diner.

"Really Tommy?" You ask with a laugh. "Donny's? You couldn't have stopped at one of the twenty other diners on the way here?"

"Oh come on y/n, you know no one makes pancakes like they do at Donny's." He joked as you two head for the door. You walk in and see the place mostly empty; just a few drunks at the bar, and a young couple over in the corner.

"They're not that great; don't forget I used to work here–I've seen the innerworkings. It's nothing special." You reply, smiling as you take your seat in the once-familiar both, the waitress coming to take your orders soon after.

How many times had you and Nikki come here after shows before you met the others? How many times had the five of you come crawling in drunk after one of Montly Crue's early gigs? How many times had one of them come in to bug you for free food while you were working? You hadn't realized how nostalgic this place was; it had been years since you'd last been here, but it still held so many memories for you and the boys.

You met Tommy in this booth.

"Man, it's crazy how long it's been since we met here, you know?" Tommy was apparently thinking the same thing you were.

"Yeah, hard to believe it's been 12 years." You reply. "We've had a wild ride, huh?"

"Hell yeah we have–you know sometimes I can't believe we actually made it this far." He answers with a smile. "I mean shit; between the five of us I don't know how at least one of us isn't dead or in prison."

"Not for lacking of trying, that's for sure." You joke, and Tommy laughs light-heartedly, before looking back at you quietly. The look in his eyes was one of admiration and affection, and it took you a little off guard.

"You know we never would have made it without you." He says, not a single ounce of sarcasm in his voice. You were taken aback by the sudden sincerity he was showing.

"Oh come on, don't start getting all weird and sentimental on me." You joke, trying to change the tone. You couldn't handle Tommy being like this with you–it was too much of a reminder of what you really wanted your relationship to be, and you didn't want any reason to start feeling false hope. "If all of us hadn't been there together it wouldn't have worked." Tommy shook his head.

"That's not what I mean. You've always been there for us–for me–like no one else has. I don't know how many times you saved me from doing something crazy or stupid, or how many times you forgave me for fucking things up or after I was a total asshole. Even now you're helping me, even when I don't know if I deserve it." He looked down, and you felt your heart ache for him. You reach out and grab his hand that was resting on the table, and he looks over at you.

"Oh Tommy, of course you do. Just because you made a mistake doesn't mean you don't deserve help." You squeeze his hand in yours gently. "I'm your best friend Tommy, even if I don't agree with what you did of course I'm still going to help you–no matter what." Tommy was quiet for a while, and before you had the chance to think of something to break the silence, the waitress brought your food over. You quickly thanked her before looking back at Tommy.

"You know the whole time I was with Heather, I felt like something was missing?" He suddenly says, his voice quiet. You feel your heart nearly stop. "She was my dream girl, the one I'd been waiting for; but it always felt like there was supposed to be something else. Something more. I don't know how to explain it–it just felt off. I thought getting married would be the missing piece, but it wasn't." He sighed, looking down at his food. You stayed still, eyes wide as you looked at him silently. In all these months he hadn't brought up his relationship with Heather once, and you didn't want to interrupt his one chance to let it all out.

"I loved Heather, but I cheated on her anyway because I thought maybe that would fill that missing part of me, but it didn't. I was just an asshole who cheated on his wife. I can't even say I'm surprised I got caught; I'm more surprised it didn't happen sooner. When she left me I was a wreck–I thought I'd fucked up the one good thing I had going for me." He looked up at you. "But now, I think I'm finally realizing maybe it was for the best; like maybe I felt like something was missing because Heather just wasn't the one, you know?" You stare back at him, unsure of what to say. He was saying everything you'd always wanted to hear, but you didn't want to make this about your feelings. And really, what could you even say after that?

"Sorry dude, I brought the whole mood down, huh?" He says at last, breaking the silence with a small laugh. "Just forget it; we should eat before our food gets cold."

The two of you eat in silence, unsure of what to say after that. You wanted to be supportive, to tell him that he was right and that he would find love again, but you were still reeling from the sudden revelation you just couldn't bring yourself to say it. You wanted to be a good friend like you always had been, by being supportive; but how could you support him finding a new love when it was so against your own feelings?

You wanted him to be happy, but now more than ever that selfish voice inside you screamed that you wanted him to be happy with you.

—

You mostly ate in silence until Tommy changed the subject and you were both back to reminiscing again. You were calmed down and mostly feeling yourself again by the time the food was finished, when Tommy looked over at you.

"Oh right! I almost forgot there's something I want to give you." He says, moving to grab his discarded jacked off the seat of the booth.

"What? I thought you said no Christmas gifts." You say, a little dismayed. "I didn't get you anything because you seemed so serious about it." He laughs as he pats the jacket pockets down, looking for something.

"I know I know, but I only said that because you've already done so much for me. If you feel bad about it being a Christmas present, maybe you can think of it as a 'thanks for taking my sorry ass in' present instead." He says as he pulls out a small black box. Your heart skips a beat as he hands it to you.

It's not a ring, obviously it's not a ring–stop being ridiculous.

You pull back the hinged lid and see a beautiful diamond necklace sitting on the black velvet lining.

"Oh Tommy, you really didn't have to–"

"I know, but I wanted to." He replies, smiling at you. "Here, let me help you." He grabs the box from your hand as he stands, moving over to sit next to you in the booth. You feel your heart racing as you turn your back to him, pulling your hair to the side as he slides the necklace around your neck. You have to stop yourself from shivering as his fingers brush against the back of your neck, quickly hooking the clasp together. You turn back around to face him, looking down at the necklace before looking up at him. He's still sitting so close you have to crane your neck to see his face.

"It's beautiful Tommy, thank you." You say, smiling up at him. You expect him to move back to his seat, or at least scoot back a little, but he just stays where he is, staring down at you. You stare back, afraid to move as you feel your face flush with heat; your heart pounding so loudly in your chest you're sure he must be able to hear it.

Before you know what's happening, Tommy moves one hand up, cupping your cheek as he leans down and kisses you.

#tommy lee x reader #the dirt!tommy lee x reader #mgk!tommy lee x reader #the dirt x reader #the dirt #Tommy Lee

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sizzlingpatrolfox · 2 years

Note

i think a lot of jikookers live in the past of thier relationship. jikook of 2021 are not jikook of 2018/2019. they've changed and grown as individuals and it's okay to reminisce what they've shown us in the past, but it doesn't seem like jimin or jungkook care to show their relationship and intimacy in the same way (that is if there is the same type of intimacy between them as before). jimin was in jeju with his friend and people wanted him to be with jk after quarantine ended. it shocks ppl.

No, they most definitely are not the same from 2018/2019.

First of all, I think Jimin probably stayed a few days in Seoul after quarantine and then he went to Jeju. I mean, it's been like a week since the end of his quarantine, right? And best believe he has friends and people in Seoul that he wanted to see too and he probably stayed to see them. Maybe Jungkook was included too.

I think it's.. weird.. maybe even silly of people to expect Jimin and Jungkook to travel together. Tokyo was the first and last trip they took together that we know of. They travelled separately the whole month of their break in 2019. Yes, they saw each other in the couple of days that they were in the same city at the same time, but the rest of the break they were both travelling here and there with other friends; Jimin internationally, Jungkook inside of Korea. I expected Jimin would be travelling inside of Korea this time. Jungkook is probably too. In 2018 during Malta their travelling habits were already different, with Jimin wanting to walk around the whole day and visit museums/historical houses while Jungkook didn't want to do any of this. Other members said too that Jungkook didn't like doing a lot of activities.

These are things that I thought in 2019 but I still think the same:

1) They already see each other a lot when they're working

2) They rarely see their other friends and spend time with them so vacations are a way to meet them

3) They don't seem to share the same energy when travelling, if we go by the last time we saw them on a trip doing things together just the two of them, which was Malta

4) Also something I've wondered is does the company allow two members to travel together or are they advised not to since it would be easier for people to recognize them and it could be dangerous?

I was really shocked in 2019 when it seemed like Jimin wouldn't be spending JK's birthday with him. I was seriously so happy that he was in Paris, but I was also surprised that it was so close to JK's birthday. These two emotions can coexist, you know? After that, I honestly spent the break trying to see if there were any news that they were together, if they went somewhere together, if people saw them, etc etc. I was really waiting on the edge of my seat for anything that would point to them spending their break together. It never really happened. I didn't think back then that they were a full stablished couple so after JK's birthday, I was admittedly waiting for those signs just to finally be able to say "oh yeah they're totally together". Now in 2021, I think I'm just comfortable with not knowing what their relationship is, and with knowing that even if they're dating each other, it's not the typical everyday type of relationship.

(And you can totally travel without your s/o, it’s normal, it’s okay for two people in a relationship to travel separately, but personally if I go on a trip with my friends eventually I would go on one or more than one with my partner. Most couples I know do this all the time, but well.)

So, this time it didn't shock me that they aren't travelling together or spending their break together, it was exactly what I expected. I wouldn't be shocked either if they never saw each other during these weeks. I mean I think that if they're together in the same city, I think that they would see each other, but even if they don't I wouldn't be surprised. Does a small part of me still wait for news that they’re travelling together or stuff like that? Yes, definitely. But fortunately I have learned to not care that much if/when it doesn’t happen.

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aestheticallyholland · 3 years

Text

NEVER NOT | THE DATE . . .

❃ PAIRING tom holland x fem!reader

❃ DISCLAIMER i do not own the artists (and the reader) that are going to portray the characters, but i do own some of the their names. the plot of the story is inspired to the book and movie 'to all the boys i've loved before' but with changes. the gifs and photos used in this series are edited by me but i get credits to the originals. also, this series is first posted in wattpad by me. PLEASE DO NOT REPOST IT SOMEWHERE ELSE !

❃ WORD COUNT 3.2k words

WANNA BE ON THE TAGLIST? feel free to comment on this post if you wanna be added to this series' taglist to get notified for updates !

NEVER NOT MASTERPOST | LEI'S LIBRARY

"Sometimes, the more you get to know a person, the more attractive they become." — anonymous

*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

IT HAS BEEN THREE WEEKS since Tom and Y/N made a deal to pretend as a couple. Who would have thought that they would actually last a week?

As usual, Y/N did her morning routine during school days. Waking up, taking a bath, eating and going out of the house.

She ate the last piece of bread and cleaned up the table before going out of the house.

"Dad! I'm going now!" Y/N exclaimed to her dad who was still upstairs.

"Take care, darling!" He replied back that made Y/N smile before closing the door behind her. She adjusted her bag and walked going to school.

She sang some of the lyrics of never not by Lauv as she was walking until someone suddenly interrupted her and made her startle.

"Morning, love!" A familiar voice suddenly said and that made her almost fall.

"Holland! You twat." Y/N scolded him and that just made him laugh at her.

"Didn't know you had an angelic voice." He said and grinned at her. That made her cheeks blush and felt embarrassed when he heard her sing. No one has ever heard her sing except for her family and Erika.

"H-how did you-" Then she gasped. "You really are a stalker." She teased him remembering that she called him that before.

"Hey! I just want to walk with my girlfriend." He said. All of a sudden, Y/N's heart suddenly pounded so hard the moment he said that. It's as if they were really together as a couple.

No. No. No. No, Y/N. Stop it!

"Whatever, Holland." She asked and flipped her hair and continued walking. Tom just chuckled at her act and jogged towards her to catch up.

"Wait up, babe." He said and that made Y/N roll her eyes.

*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

Going lunch with the one and only Tom Holland was far different from when it was only Y/N and Erika. Y/N was with her boyfriend's group of friends and that made her feel out of place.

As they were laughing and talking, Y/N just sat there awkwardly, not saying anything until she felt an arm around her shoulders that startled her. Tom was already noticing that Y/N was out of place so he did what he had to do.

"Are you okay, babe?" He asked with a concerning face and that made her smile at him.

"Yes, Tom. I just feel out of place." She whispered it so that his friends wouldn't hear.

"I'll make it up to you later." He said. "How about a date after school?" He asked her.

"Well, dating wasn't in the contract so-"

"Stop thinking about the contract for a while." He said. "Consider this as a two-week anniversary. My treat."

Y/N felt a slight blush coming from her cheeks but she shrugged it off and roll her eyes on him, playfully. "Alright, Holland." She smiled at him and he made an expression of joy.

"Hey, Y/N!" She heard Harrison called her and she looked at him with a 'what?' expression.

"Would you slap Tom for 100 dollars?" He joked and that made the other laugh at him except for Tom who just glared at his best mate.

"Shut it, Osterfield." Y/N heard Tom said.

"Who said that I wouldn't?" Y/N joked back and that made his friends laugh more. Tom looked at her like how he glared at Harrison and that made her smile at him wide.

"I'm kidding babe." She said and kissed him on his cheek which caused his friends to tease both of them.

"Shut it, you dweeb."

*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

"Hey, Aria. I won't be having dinner with you guys today, if you don't mind. I'm going out with Tom to have dinner together." Y/N said through her phone on her ear.

"My sister is all grown up." She started and Y/N could hear her squeal from the phone. "Of course, I'll let dad know."

"Thank you, Sis."

"And remember, stay protected!" That was what her sister said. When Y/N got what it meant, she was about to scold Aria but instead, the call had already ended.

"Why are people acting so weird today?" She asked herself as she kept her phone to her pocket until she heard her best friend's voice calling her from the hallway.

"Y/N!" She looked at where the voice was coming and saw Erika running towards her with a paper on her hand.

"Erika!" Y/N called back and Erika reached her and she panted at first from running.

"Why the hell were you running?" Y/N asked as Erika was trying to catch her breath.

"Maybe I should go back to track and field again. Damn, my back hurts when I run." Erika said and stretched her back. "But anyway!"

"I got an A+ for the first time of my life, Y/N!" She squealed and showed the paper that she was holding to Y/N's face. "See!"

Y/N got startled when Erika suddenly shove the paper to her face. "Oh my god, how did you do that?" Y/N asked while scanning through the paper.

"It's called, luck!" Erika exclaimed which caused people to look at her but of course, she doesn't care. "Anyways! Do you want to go somewhere after this?" She asked as she kept her test paper on her bag.

"Tom already asked me out for dinner," Y/N said and that made Erika put her hand on her chest.

"Are you ditching me for him?" Erika asked in a dramatic way and Y/N could just chuckle. "I'm kidding! Go have fun and stay protected."

Y/N glared at her. "I'm not going to do it with him!" She said and that made Erika laugh.

Erika saw someone behind Y/N and smirked. "There's your prince charming. I better go. Enjoy your date, lovebirds!"

Y/N turned around only to meet chocolate eyes looking at her. She smiled at him and walked towards him. He smiled back at her as he stopped walking and just looked at her.

How did she get this pretty? He asked himself.

What the hell, Tom? Another voice asked and he shrugged if off.

"Ready to go?" He asked her.

"Where are we going through?" She asked and they walked together going outside.

"To the restaurant you told me that you and your dad would go." He told her and his eyes widen.

"The last time I went there was a month ago." She said.

"And that's about to change." He said and placed an arm around her as they head towards his car.

*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

It was past six in the evening when they've arrived in the restaurant. Y/N was too excited that when Tom parked his car, she suddenly went out first. She was so ready to eat whatever they're going to order.

This place was full of memories for her.

"Relax, Y/N." She heard Tom say and closed the door to his car to go to her

"I missed this place." She said. "Let's go!" She grabbed his hand and went inside the restaurant.

As they went inside, she could feel the good old vibes that she felt since she first went here with her parents. She looked around and saw a familiar face on the counter.

"Aunt Mary!" She greeted and the lady looked up from the counter. She squinted her eyes to see who it really was.

"Y/N?" She called back and Y/N nodded and walked towards her aunt. She wrapped her arms around her aunt and have a loving hug.

"How are you, my dear?" Aunt Mary asked.

"I'm alright. School is just driving me crazy." Y/N answered and she felt Tom going beside her.

"And who is this young man?" Her aunt asked.

"This is Tom Holland. My—"

"Her boyfriend, Ma'am." He interrupted Y/N with a smile and shook hands with her Aunt.

"My little girl is grown up, oh my." She answered. "Since when, dear?"

"Just two weeks ago, Auntie," Y/N answered.

"Well, I won't disturb you on your date tonight." Aunt Mary teased and turned to Y/N. "The usual, dear?" She asked and took out a pen and pad paper.

"Yes, please," Y/N said.

"How about you, Tom?" She turned to Tom to ask for his order.

"I would like some burger and just soda, please." He said.

"Alright. The usual table is waiting for you Y/N. And the jukebox is there too." Aunt Mary said and Y/N got excited once more.

"Thank you, Auntie," Y/N said and held Tom free hand and head towards the usual table that they use whenever they go in the restaurant.

Y/N sat down and Tom sat down in front of her. He noticed a small jukebox that was on their table.

"Are there jukeboxes in every table here?" He asked and observed the jukebox.

"Not all actually." She said. "When I was a kid, we would go here most of the time and it just happened that Aunt Mary works here."

"Is she like a relative or something?"

"She's my mom's best friend actually since their high school years." She answered. "So she's like my second mother."

"That explains why you're close." He said and looked at Y/N as she tugged her hair to her ear.

"She was the one who took care if me and Aria when my mom passed away. My dad became depressed for a few years because of that and couldn't concentrate on taking care of us."

Y/N could remember her dad becoming depressed when their mother died. He started to drink every night and she would usually catch him crying in his room with a bottle of wine on the floor.

"Your dad really loves your mom." Tom interrupted Y/N's thoughts.

"He does, really." She said and sighed while looking around the restaurant, how people and families are eating happily together. "There are so many memories in this restaurant."

"Like?" He asked.

"This is where my dad met my mom when she was still working here for a part-time job with Aunt Mary." She started. "My mom was a hard to get girl even though she started developing feelings for my dad." She chuckled at the thought.

"Your dad's a fighter then," Tom said and chuckled.

"Indeed, he was." She said and smiled. "They went on dates here until Aria and I was born."

"I wish I met your mom honestly," Tom said.

Y/N just looked at Tom and smiled. She likes that he was just listening to her and he liked that about guys.

She placed her head on her hands and just looked at him. "You're a good listener, eh?" She asked and Tom just chuckled.

"Indeed I am."

Y/N was about to ask something when she got interrupted by Aunt Mary's voice going towards them.

"Your orders are here!" She said with trays on her hands and she placed then down their table.

"Enjoy your date, darlings." Aunt Mary said before going away from them.

"Thank you, Auntie," Y/N said and Tom just smiled at her aunt.

They started to eat their respective food and Y/N was enjoying herself until she remembered what she wanted to ask Tom a while ago.

"How many girls have you been with before Camille?" She asked as she at her fries and looking at him.

He paused for a while to look back to the past. "Two actually, but the first one was like not an official relationship. We just both liked each other until it faded." He answered. "And the second girl was the first girl that I had an official relationship with until things got out of hand that I'd rather not talk about." He ate one of his fries before he continued talking. "Then there was Camille whom I've been with for almost two years."

"I didn't know both of you lasted that long," Y/N said. She only heard about the both of them when they were upcoming seniors and she couldn't believe that Camille finally got the one she had a crush on when they were still in middle school.

And the fact that she hated me because I got to have my first kiss with Tom was just unbelievable. Y/N thought to herself.

"I thought she was worth it until she broke it off," Tom said and looked down. Y/N looked at him with awe and placed her hand on top of his. Tom looked at her and he saw her smile at him.

"I'm starting to get over it though." He said and Y/N just giggled. "That's a good thing, right?" She asked.

"Yep. I like hanging out with you better." He said while taking a bite of his burger.

And that made her heart skip a beat. She felt her cheeks heated. "R-really?"

"Of course." He said with his strong British accent.

She shrugged off the feeling that she felt and tried to change the subject.

"The best part of this restaurant is the jukebox," Y/N said and looked at the jukebox that was on their table. "Do you have a coin with you?" She asked him.

He looked for a coin on his pocket until he felt a tiny circle and got it out. "Here." He handed her the coin.

Y/N got the coin from him and inserted it on the jukebox. She pressed the button where the music will start to play and it was perfect timing that the song that was playing Bring It On Home To Me by Sam Cooke.

"Oh my god. This is my parents' song!" She said in a happy way and looked at Tom. "They used to dance this together when they come here." She said and had an idea. She stood up from her seat and Tom looked at her with confusion.

"What are you doing?" He asked and chuckled.

"Dance with me." She said and grinned.

"Really, Y/N?" He asked her and she nodded.

"Come on!" She insisted and grabbed both of his hands to pull him up from his seat. When he stood up, he placed his arms around her waist and Y/N placed her arms around his neck.

"This is nice." That was what Tom could only say when they were swaying around while holding each other. Y/N smiled at him and felt his shyness to dance. "The people won't mind, Tom. Don't be shy." She whispered in her ear.

"Who said that I was?" He asked and Y/N laughed.

"I can read your face, Holland." She said and they continued to dance until the song came to an end. She placed her head on his chest and could hear his heartbeats.

It was beating fast. She thought but she didn't mind it.

After the song ended, Tom guided her back to her seat like a gentleman. He sat back in front of her and was ready to go.

"I'll just pay the bills to your Aunt. I'll be right back." He said.

"I'll wait for you outside," Y/N said and got her stuff and went out of the restaurant first.

When she was outside, she looked at Tom was on the counter and was smiling while talking to her aunt like a real boyfriend he was.

It felt like it was a real date rather than a pretend one. From the dancing, to the opening up with each other and everything else. It was natural for them already.

What is this feeling? She asked herself.

She looked back at Tom who was already waving goodbye to her aunt and went out of the restaurant.

"What did my aunt say to you?" Y/N asked him and just chuckled.

"She asked how old I am." He answered and opened the door to his car for Y/N.

"Such a gentleman." She said and went inside the car.

"So where are we going now?" Y/N asked as Tom was driving.

"My house. I want you to meet my family." The moment he said that Y/N felt her hands shaking.

"W-what?" She asked.

"Yup, just for a while then I'll take you home. All of them are free tonight and tomorrow, they'll be busy again." He said.

Y/N just nodded but could still feel nervous. She had never had a boyfriend and now she's going to meet her pretend boyfriend's parents.

*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

"Good evening, mum," Tom said to the lady in front of him and she looked at him with a smile.

"Hello, Thomas." She said and noticed Y/N beside him. "Who is this lovely young lady?" She asked.

"Y/N Y/L/N. His girlfriend, Ma'am." Y/N said with a smile.

"Please, call me Nikki. I feel old when you call me Ma'am, honestly." She said.

"Mom, we were just here to drop by. I have to drop her off to her house." Tom said.

"Alright. Please drop by here soon, dear." Nikki said while she looked at Y/N. "It would be nice to have lunch or dinner with you sometime."

"I will definitely drop by soon, Nikki. Tom told me you're a great cook." Y/N said with a smile.

Nikki smiled back and wrapped her arms around Y/N to hug. "You're a great lady, Y/N."

"Thank you, Nikki," Y/N replied and pulled away from the hug to go beside Tom.

"We'll be going now, Mum," Tom said.

"Don't go home too late, darling," Nikki told her son.

"I won't!" He replied and led Y/N back to his car. She waved and smiled one last time to his family before going into the car.

*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

Tom parked his car right in front of Y/N's house and turned off the engine. Y/N removed her seatbelt and opened the door to go out and Tom did the same. They walked together towards the front door and stopped when they've reached there.

Y/N turned to face him and gave him a smile. "Thank you for the date, Thomas."

"You're really going to start calling me by that from now on?" He asked and that made Y/N giggle.

"I'm your girlfriend, so yes." She said and giggled more which made Tom smiled at her. He found her so beautiful when she laughs.

"But seriously though." She tugged a hair behind her ear. "Thank you for taking me to that restaurant and for letting me meet your family." She said.

"You deserve it, love," Tom said and Y/N felt a blush when he called her that endearment.

"I'll get going now, Tom." She said and unlocked the front door with her keys and opened it. Before closing, she turned around to look at him once again. "Good night." She smiled.

"See you in school, love." He said and smiled back.

Before she went in, she suddenly went near Tom and pressed her lips to his right cheek. She gave a smile before going inside her house and closed the front door.

Tom was left dumbfounded by the kiss and touched his right cheek like an idiot. He smiled to himself and chuckled because of her cute action. He finally walked towards his car while Y/N watched him through the window and saw him drive away.

She closed the curtain and walked up towards her room with a smile on her face.

❃ TAGLIST @allthisfortommy @kait4073 @lovebittenbyevans @l0ve-0f-my-life @spiitfiires

#tom holland #tom holland x reader #tom holland x fem!reader #tom holland imagine #tom holland series

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