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#caroline rose feel the way i want
aro-ortega · 1 year
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I got this feeling
Baby, it's just madness
I'm so in love with myself, it's so romantic
[...]
Gonna feel the way I want to
Feel the way I want to
Feel the way I want to feel
companion piece/sequel to [animal]
learning to love the self through the other
(aka i am so invested in the relationship between sidestep and the puppet)
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star-girl69 · 2 months
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hi everyone! this is so lazy but pls enjoy 🫶🫶
warnings: swearing and also slight freaky stuff 😣
you: good morning my sweet girlfriend
kk: wtf
kk: why r u not in my bed??
you: babe… i told u i had to leave early this morning bc i had an appt
kk: for what?
you: getting my nails done
kk: u abandoned me to get ur nails done?
you: yes…?
you: i don’t think i appreciate this attitude maybe i’ll just go back to my dorm
kk: please come back to my place.
you: say pretty please with sprinkles on top
kk: y/n
you: ok see u tmrw then
kk: pretty please with sprinkles on top.
you: ofc i will come back to urs 🥰
kk: 🙄
you: attitude????
kk: no ily
you: aww i love u too!
—-
you: can u plz drive me to my friend’s birthday dinner on friday and pick me up
kk: what times
you: drop me off at 6 pick me up at 9
kk: ok no problem
you: thank u ily
you: i would carpool w my friend serena but i don’t trust her in a car
you: she runs red lights a lot lol
kk: ??? plz don’t ever get into a car with her. i will drive u always
you: aww ur so sweet! not wanting me to die 🥰
kk: anything for my passenger princess
—-
you: CAROLINE ROSE HARVEY
kk: im sorry
kk: i’m so sorry
kk: i’ll make it up to you i promise im so sorry
laila: what did you do to kk 😭😭
laila: she’s staring at her phone in horror and when i asked her what was wrong she just said y/n before putting her head in her hands
you: i’m letting her sit in fear for a minute
laila: i admire you a lot ❤️
you: so i wake up this morning
kk: yes and u looked so pretty when i left
you: thank u
you: anyways and i then go about my day and i’m ready to run out and do my errands i look at myself in the mirror
kk: and u saw how beautiful u r?
you: yes and also i saw a GAINT FUCKING HICKEY ON MY NECK
you: SEVERAL OF THEM ACTUALLY
kk: do u really want me to say sorry for that
you: yes??? i need so much makeup to cover this up. actually i think u should buy new concealer for me
kk: as long as i can do it again
you: no this is so embarrassing
kk: it’s ok you’ll be saying different later
kk: besides u were encouraging me last night
you: ur delusional i’ve never done that
kk: if u say so babe but we both know
you: *link to new concealer*
kk: just bought 2 prepare to use them up
you: no
kk: yessss
you: no
kk: 😉
you: die
kk: ❤️
—-
you: i’m really craving chick fil a
kk: ok
you: i’m REALLY craving chick fil a
kk: u mentioned that
you: bye u don’t care abt me
you: gonna go text my other hoes
kk: u don’t have other hoes
you: im about to
kk: we’ll see
you: PLEASE GET ME CHICK FIL A
you: PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE
kk: thought u were texting other hoes?
you: i lied ur my only hoe and ilysm
you: plz get me chick fil a
you: i’ll do a cartwheel on it
kk: ???
kk: babe i’ll get u chick fil a
kk: thanks tho? i think
you: YAYYYY
—-
kk: i know ur asleep right now and i know u r very tired and i’m sorry but i forgot my helmet can u pls bring it to me at the rink
you: how did u forget ur helmet
you: like it weighs 10 pounds and it’s huge
kk: mean
kk: and idk i’m stupid plz bring it
you: ugh fine i’m On my way!
you: omw.
you: im not excited
kk: i love u so much u r the light of my life i cannot imagine waking up without ur beautiful face next to me u are brighter than the sun and i love u
you: thank u shakespeare ur so romantic
you: can we go shopping tmrw and u pay i need new pants
kk: u don’t need pants
you: it’s 9am
kk: yes we can go shopping tmrw
you: love u!
kk: ❤️
—-
you: hi
you: are u doing anything tn?? i feel like we haven’t seen each other in forever
kk: i know baby i miss u
kk: i have practice until 8 but u can come over still after? sleepover?
you: yes definitely i’ll be there
kk: i cant wait to see u pretty girl
—-
you: omg this restaurant looks so good we should go
kk: sunday at 6?
you: um yes i’m free
kk: just made a reservation
you: damn 😭 i’m impressed
kk: whatever my girl wants she gets 🤷‍♀️
—-
you: hi baby
you: so what position u got her in rn?
you: missionary? cowgirl?
kk: why do i love u
you: blocked
kk: i have no girls in no positions except for u
you: why are u so busy then?
kk: picked up this new hobby called hockey idk if it will go anywhere
kk: been at the gym for an hour about to go hit the rink
you: send workout pics 😜
—-
kk: hiiiiiiiiii
you: hi babe
kk: tone down that attitude plz
you: ?
kk: actually
kk: turn around show me that ass
you: are u drunk rn
kk: maybe
kk: you have an amazing ass do i tell u that enough
kk: i should tell u more
kk: i love ur ass
you: thank u…
you: do u need to be picked up?
kk: no laila is dd
kk: wanted to talk to my pretty girl
you: u sure know how to make a girl blush
kk: only u babe
kk: i like ur boobs too
you: oh my god pls hand the phone to laila
kk: this is laila don’t worry we’re going home rn
you: laila ur a goddess thank u
kk: i try ❤️❤️
—-
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chibsandchill · 8 months
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See me
Fandom: Saltburn 
Pairing: Felix x AFAB!Reader 
Summary: Each room in Saltburn is bursting at the seam with memories with you, and Felix remembers some of his favorite moments as he makes his way to his prize. 
Warnings: Felix, Mentions and descriptions of acts of violence and murder, NSFW content, MDNI, 18+, unreliable narrator (Felix), toxic relationship, obsessive tendencies, grammatical and spelling errors, p in v sex, oral sex (m receiving), Felix is a creep, themes of violence - self-harm and equivalent themes are prevalent through the imagine, some parts of their dynamic takes inspiration from Hannigram but with my spin on obsession
I am not responsible for your media consumption. Read the tags. 
MDNI
Masterlist
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It’s a cloudy day when Felix first saw you,
but with you came the sun, 
warmth, empathy, love. 
Oh, how he loved your heart. But, oh, how careless you were with it. It was a gift, 
one meant for him, 
from you. 
Then why did you waste it on those beneath you? You chipped away at it to mend sobbing students, tore at it until it bled and thick scars rose like mountains. You took on their pain with a blindingly bright smile, 
only Felix saw how their burdens weighed you down. 
The sun was meant to warm, to burn from far away, 
but they tore you down from your place in the sky so that they might leech your warmth until you are left barren. Their sorrows were cold as ice against you. 
They stole you from him. Piece by piece they ripped at you with filthy nails. You became known on campus as someone who’d listen. Who wouldn’t judge. How could you when you felt their problems as if they were your own? The more they spoke those words dripping with poison, the more they tainted the very blood in your veins with their darkness. 
‘Walk in their shoes’. 
You didn’t need to. You could walk in their skin, feel their emotions as if they were yours. Heartbreak plagued you, sorrow fell on you like an ever present shadow. The death of a family not yours turned your face gray and your eyes misty.
Until Felix put a stop to it all. How could he stand by and watch it happen? The slow destruction of a bright star, who burned so bright that all envied it. 
Jenny from history of art, Carl from math, Robert from physics, Matilda from psychology, Caroline, Jeremy, Han, Thomas, Harry, Derek, Henry, Linda, Nico, Mark, John, Hans, William, Frederic. All turned away at your door. 
“Yes, I’ll tell her.”
“I’ll let her know.”
“Sure thing, buddy.”
Oh, how they believed his lies. Sweet, sweet, Felix Catton wouldn’t lie to them. Surely not. 
But lie, he did. It spewed from his lips like honey. All to have his sun beam at him again. To wash away the taint of the others from your skin, your heart, your eyes. He would have you look at him with soft, relaxed eyes. 
Him. Him. Him. Him.
Your protector. Even if you didn’t know it yet. 
“Felix.” 
He hummed. 
Your eyes are heavy with sleep when you look up at him, but the affection is hard to miss. It makes you glow. Felix curled his arm further around you, bringing you closer to him. But even then it is not close enough. He aches. It’s a want deeper than skin, deeper than bones or even his soul. It was as if his very being was made of want, of longing so intense he was blinded by it. If God was indeed real then he had created Felix with a thread laced with obsession, with love transcending all else. 
Even thinking about you made his heart race, pound. 
“Can I braid your hair?” 
“‘Course.” He said against your skin. 
As if you needed to ask. All of him was yours. 
You try to sit up but Felix isn’t ready to break the contact yet. He feels like a battery, no matter how bizarre a comparison it is, constantly needing to be recharged so that he might survive when you part. He’s constantly cold without you, he feels empty; hollow. His hands are too light with the lack of you, he breathes too easy without the weight of you on his chest. If he could he’d carve his heart out so that you could carry it with you, for that was how he felt anyway. He’d gouge himself hollow so that he could fit you inside. Never to be parted again, joined together by shared blood, flesh and bone. 
It’s not easy with his hold on you, but you manage to shift so that you sit in his lap instead. It’s not ideal if you mean to truly braid his hair but Felix won’t complain. He pushed his head into your touch when your fingers hover over him. 
“Patience.” You half-heartedly scold him. 
Your fingers weave through his hair, nails scratching just right against his scalp. With deft hands you untangle the mess you’d created during the night. There’s not much to braid but more than enough for you to wrap around your fingers and tug. The action pulls a low groan from his throat. 
He grabs your hips. Felix wonders if you’ve noticed how he’s caged you in. You probably don’t, as sweet and trusting a being as you surely wouldn’t peel back his layers to gasp at the thriving darkness beneath. With you he was his truest self. Could you see him? Would you run if he were to cast off the layers? Let you see him? 
Maybe you already could. You had seen the others. Even the empty ones, the ones who had gouged themselves hollow and shoved the essence of what they thought he wanted until it spilled from every hole in their body. 
Felix wasn’t hollow. He was bursting at the seams with life, same as you. And yet you stayed. Surely you knew. You had to. You and he were one. Two pieces of a whole finally reunited. 
He breaths in your scent, noses along your throat before allowing his head to rest in the crook of your neck. There’s a bruise there hidden on your shoulder blade. Late one night when you’d already fallen asleep he mouthed it into your skin with the moon as his witness, 
only, 
it had started to fade. 
He’d have to do it again. Closer. Marking you under the cover of darkness wasn’t enough anymore. An unspoken claim didn’t satisfy him anymore. It wasn’t enough. He was beginning to think it never would be. He could bruise every inch of your skin with his love and his skin would still itch to do more – to prove himself more to you.  
Just as his hands slide down to rest on the curve of your ass the scene slips through his fingers like sand. 
He blinks it away. He’s standing in the driveway of Saltburn. Your favorite statue is left in shambles on the gravel with his blood splattered across the white marble. 
“What the fuck.” Felix’s hand shakes and burns with pain. His knuckles are split open. 
It had been a slip of a thought he had once when you first came to Saltburn and you’d taken to leaning on the statues, the furniture, walls, pillars. He’d wanted them all gone. He’d be your pillar. He wouldn’t crumble with age, would never make you think they stood strong only for the core to be riddled with holes from pests.
Felix was whole and strong, had made himself such, 
for you. 
He’d burnt the tendrils of influence his mother had dug into him since childhood. Torn the threads of her darkness right out of the tapestry. Oh, how she cried when she noticed. ‘Felix,’ she’d whispered, a rare show of emotion plastered across her face, ‘what have you done?’. 
She shouldn’t have worried about what he had done. No, she should’ve worried about what he was going to do. 
He watched you for weeks before approaching you. He noticed what made you laugh, what made you smile, frown, scowl. And so he took that too. Cut out the parts of himself that would drop the smile from your face and sewed on the parts that he lacked until he was left a patch-work version of perfecting befitting a Mary Shelley novel. Pus and blood seeped from the stitches. The sight was unseemly. So he waited until he’d perfected himself, until the stolen was assimilated, until it was like another Felix had never existed. 
Felix throws the heavy doors open and the maids scurry away from his sight. 
Duncan emerges from the pack. Even after all he’d seen, his adoration for Felix remained. “Welcome back, Felix.” 
He nods. 
And then he’s off. 
The route he takes is reminiscent of your first tour of the mansion. He’s even nodding along as if hearing himself introduce it all. The staircase where he “fingered” his cousin. As if. Your face had reddened with equal parts jealousy and sheer disbelief of ‘what the fuck’. 
One of the smaller sitting rooms. The green one. He fucking hates that room. But you love it. He went down on you for the first time there. Right on the couch with his granny’s ghost knocking down a shelf of antique plates over his head. The blood had driven you crazy. 
The thought alone made him hard. 
But this was also the first room you’d held him properly in. He’d been crying. 
“What's wrong?” You ask when he threw the door open. 
You’d been doing some summer reading for uni, but your fingers clutched the opening pages with strength that betrayed your pounding headache. 
“Fucking Ollie.” 
Your brows furrow “Oliver?”
Felix lay down on the couch with his head in your lap. You smell good. And you’re soft. 
“Yeah.” He sigh. “He was lying to us this whole time. Turns out poor Oliver Quick has both a dad and mum who loves him. Even siblings! They live in a lovely house in a picture perfect neighborhood.”
‘I just need you to understand how much I fucking love you!’
As if there was even a sliver of Felix that didn’t belong to you, that didn’t scream out for you every second you were apart. Had Oliver not been paying attention? Could he not see the need that permated him? It ran so deep, was so all-consuming that he couldn’t contain it all. He breathed desire, cried longing, even fucking pissed envy. Envy even over the very air you breathed, the clothing that hugged you, the sheets for the audacity to imply he wasn’t enough to keep you warm. 
You hum as your fingers drift down to cup his face. 
“He was in love with me.” 
“Isn’t everyone?” You joke. 
Felix’s eyes opened (he hadn’t realized he closed them). “You love me?”
“Of course.” You trace a scar on his cheekbone. 
“Say it.” 
“I love you, Felix.”
Even that memory fades, but your words linger. 
I love you, Felix. 
You always linger. Your kisses burn his skin and he wishes it left a scar so that he could look upon it and relive it all. 
The green room is abandoned quickly, and he’s off. 
“A blue room!” You exclaim, and to Felix’s displeasure you let go of him to take it all in. 
“Yeah. It’s… blue.” 
“What? No ghosts? No artifacts?”
Felix shakes his head. “Nope. Just blue.”
Felix sees himself leaning against the door while you spin around the room. It’s like a movie, almost. Only it’s his memories and he can remember every second he’s ever spent in your presence. Including this one. And the next one. 
The one where you’re on your knees.
You’re pressing soft kisses to the tip of his cock, pressing your love into every inch of skin you can find as if you wanted to stay there, to have your love replace the tar that ran through his veins. 
It’s odd. He can almost feel the tingles left by your touch, but he’s untouched. Felix’s hands form fists at the sight. Was it possible to be jealous even of himself? The envy boiling in his stomach certainly said so. He would not share you even with himself. 
Felix strides forward and sinks into the place his past self sits. He unbuckles his jeans and frees his cock from his underwear. If he were not so deep in madness he might’ve felt the cold of the room, but he was, and so he felt the warmth of your hands, the wetness of your mouth as you wrap your lips around his tip. 
He moans. He didn’t know what he liked the most about it. The vulnerability, the act itself, your presence, or that it left you with a part of him inside you. You’d kneel in front of him for as long as it took, but Felix would not have you be uncomfortable and so he slid a pillow under your knees. 
Your hands cup his balls. He twitches. You take more of him into you. It feels like heaven to have you wrap yourself around him. Wet, warm, silky heaven. All for him. 
Him. Him. Him. Him. His. 
You moan around him. It sends vibrations straight through him. It pulls a low groan straight from his chest, one that makes you moan. His pleasure is your pleasure, and your pleasure is his, and so the circle begins. 
His eyes roll into the back of his head when you begin bobbing your head up and down. You slurp. Electricity runs down his spine. It’s wet. Sloppy. Saliva drips down your mouth as you press your nose into his abdomen. 
Someone drops a plate somewhere in the house and the spell is broken. Not unlike a reflection in a lake is the memory distorted, wrong. You’re on your knees without the pillow. He’s standing above you, not sitting. Your knees are bruised and bleeding. You’re crying. 
Some small part of him, one that he’d allowed to fester for far too long, enjoys the scene. Enjoys the submission, thrives in the knowledge that it is not only he that longs and wants and would press and press until nothing remains if only to bring you a sliver of happiness. You smile around his cock. It’s not the pain that brings you to tears. 
This isn’t right. This isn’t him. It’s Elspeth messing with his head. It’s Oliver whispering his lies in his ear. 
He wants to vomit. Why would they punish him so? To make him see you hurt, 
to force him to see himself hurt you, brutalize you, 
humiliate you. 
Why, when he adored you, worshiped you. If there was a puddle he’d lay himself down to let you walk over him. He’d drown himself so that you would not have to dirty yourself. Like a tumor he’d performed surgery after surgery to remove what you didn’t like. 
And you did the same. 
The image is restored, but he’s already on his feet. 
He would wait no longer. 
Felix runs up the stairs but is forced to a halt by the moans coming from the king’s bedroom. Another memory? The door is already open. 
“Tell me your vows again.” 
You’ve got your legs up in the air behind you, head resting in your hands as you stare at him. 
“Dear,” Felix turns around from where he stood by the window. Your name sounds like prayer on his lips. “I’ve never been alone. People have flocked to me since before I can remember. But they didn’t see me. But you… you, I let you see me. It’s a rare gift. And it’s one that I’ve never regretted giving you. I’ve never felt more loved than in your arms. Do I need to continue, Mrs Catton?” 
You laugh. 
“Come to bed, Felix.”
The memory changes before he can enjoy the sight of you in your wedding dress. The happiest day of his life. Gone in a blink. 
You’re no longer on the bed. You’re in his arms, crying yet again. There’s blood on his shirt. No finger graces your finger. Felix closes his eyes. He knows this memory. KNows very well what he’d have to endure to get back to you. 
“Y-you killed him!” You shudder. 
Felix shushes you. “There was no other way.”
“There’s always another way.”
“Not this time." 
Truly, there wasn’t. You saw much, but Oliver was so good at pretending to be someone else that he even fooled himself into believing his own lies. And so, you thought nothing of it when Oliver offered you his bottle of wine. Had no idea of the drugs that he’d shoved in there. 
“Are you scared of me?” Felix asks you. His voice shakes. He remembers his own fear, how his stomach churned. He could write a thousand words and not even chip at the surface of the emotions he felt. A thrill at the thought of you finally seeing the deepest deepest parts of him? Disgust that he’d slipped and revealed a crack in his mask? Such fear that it clung to his very bones, stopped his lungs from working and had his own eyes water with tears? All true. And yet all of them are false. There wasn’t a single emotion he could place, they all blended together to form a concoction of heart-wrenching pain and fear. 
The memory fades away. He doesn’t remember the rest. All he remembers is how it ended. 
The headboard bangs against the wall with the force of his thrusts. His hands are cradling your face, kissing away the tears of pleasure. You push your legs up higher on his back where you’ve hitched them, your own hands pressing against his own face to bring him closer. He’s inside you but he’s not close enough. 
Felix leans down to cover your whole body with his. You squeak at the change. 
“Oh god,” you throw your head back with a moan. 
He moves a deft finger down to press down on your clit. He experimented with pressure, directions, even spelled out his own name with your pleasure. Felix feels as though he’s on fire, but still he wants more. He wants to be closer. Closer. Closer. Closer. 
You clench around his cock, and he stutters. 
The love in your eyes makes him falter, before he drives into you faster than before. The bed squeaks, one hard thrust away from breaking. Fitting. So is he. Your right hand moved up his cheekbone, past his ear and to the back of his head. Your touch is gentle, barely-there pressure as you guide him down to slant your mouth over his. His heart aches with love, adoration, you. You’ve made it your home. 
Yet again he is denied release as the memory is gone. The room is empty. 
“Fuck.”
It’s not graceful the way he stalks out of the room. No more interruptions, he thinks. 
The last door in the corridor. Yours. And his. Your marital chambers, as Duncan would call it. Old fashioned bastard. 
He pushes it open without as much as a knock. And there you are. 
“Felix!” You cross the room in seconds and then you’ve thrown yourself in his arms. “We missed you!”
Your rounded stomach presses into him. He rests his forehead on yours, pressing long, soft kisses against your lips, even as you giggle and try to move away. When you do, he chases after you. He’s not done. Never done. 
His legs feel like jelly, his soul is on fire, 
but he finally found you.
In a house full of memories and vengeful ghosts he found you. 
And you saw him, as you always do, and he’s tugged back into bed with the comforting weight of you pressing him down into the mattress. 
And he’s almost content. 
Almost. 
Taglist:
@fedyascoffin
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athenamikaelson · 3 months
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Klaus Mikaelson x Reader!Soulmate x Elijah Mikaelson PART 5
Word Count- 3.3k
Warnings- Swearing, violence, slight SA, Elijah being a simp.
A/N- This chapter wasn’t much but I wanted to get something out to you guys. NEXT CHAPTER though, there will be a lot of Elijah and reader. I am very excited to write that. And most likely the chapter after that will be the intro of our favorite Hybrid, which I know many of you have been itching for. 
ALSO, I want to thank you all for your support. It means so much to me that so many of you love this series as much as I do.
“Wait, so Rose is dead, werewolves are roaming the streets of Mystic Falls, and some bitch kidnapped you? All in a span of a week. ”
I look up to Caroline who is sitting behind me braiding my hair. She solemnly nods and frowns. 
“Ya, thankfully though Elijah’s witches came in clutch and helped save the day,” Caroline says as she moves my head forward to go back to braiding my hair. 
“Elijah helped,” I question Elena, who sits before me with Bonnie as they paint each other’s nails. Elena had called me an hour ago saying we were having a sleepover at Careoline’s but she never explained why. 
She nods, “Ya, I guess he is keeping his side of the deal.
Bonnie chimes into the conversation but I tone them out. Ever since that night in Elena’s room, my mind has been plagued by thoughts of the suited original vampire. His dark eyes haunt my dreams and when I’m awake I feel as if he’s not far away. I know I’m being delusional but I have these moments where I think I’m going to turn around and he’s going to be standing right behind me. 
“He’s kind of cute,” Caroline’s words bring me back to the conversation at hand. 
“Who?” 
“Have you not been listening,” She asks me, to which I just shrug my shoulders embarrassedly. Caroline and I have started to have an interesting friendship. Unlike my friendship with Elena in which we both have somewhat trauma bonded, my friendship with Caroline is more her talking my ear off and me enjoying not having to talk. I had originally thought that Caroline and I wouldn’t mesh well since I kind of hate people who don’t know when to shut up. But oddly enough we work well together. I don’t pressure her to stop talking and she doesn’t pressure me to talk. 
Bonnie and I on the other hand both talk much so when we’re together it’s mostly in peaceful silence. I think we both appreciate that though with all the hectic things we’ve had to deal with. 
“Elijah. I was talking about Elijah. He’s got that suave gentleman look to him, but he also looks like he’d be a freak in the sheets if you know what I mean,” She jokingly shoves me but for some reason hearing her talk about him that way makes an odd feeling rise in my gut, “He seems like your type Y/N.”
My eyebrows furrow, “What’s that supposed to mean?”
Caroline shrugs her shoulder, “I don’t know, just an inference.”
“How about we order food,” Elena pipes up, I’m guessing she noticed the embarrassed look I had on my face and decided to rescue me from that awkward conversation. I send her a small smile as Caroline instantly agrees and Bonnie nods. 
Thirty minutes later, Bonnie, Elena, Caroline, and I are sitting on the floor of Caroline’s bedroom eating Chinese food. I watch silently as Bonnie and Caroline argue if we should watch The Notebook or Pride and Prejudice. Elena sits next to me watching and giggling at them. As I sit there silently watching all my new friends, I find myself smiling to myself. For the first time in years, I actually feel as if I belong. As if I’m a part of something. And I like it. I really like it. 
RING RING RING
I jolt awake at the ringing of a cell phone and groan as the morning light pierces my eyes. I’m not the only one annoyed from being awoken because I hear Caroline and Bonnie growling at Elena for answering her phone so early in the morning. I can hear some of what she and Stefan are talking about from her position outside the door but decide listening to them flirt isn’t how I want to spend my morning so I throw my pillow over my head and try to suffocate myself. I’m about to doze off when my pillow is ripped off my face. 
“First of all, suffocation really,” Elena glances down at me from her standing position, “Second of all you’re getting a call.” She hands me my phone. I glance down at the unknown number on the screen and groan as I answer it, already annoyed with the caller.
“What do you want Damon?” I asked annoyed as I waited for the vampire to respond. 
“I’m picking you up from your house in an hour you better be dressed to impress Mystic Falls’ elite.”
“What the hell are you talking about Demon?”
“Listen Pukey, I got word that our favorite original is going to be at the Mayor’s tea party and you’re going as my plus one.”
I frown at Damon’s mention of Elijah, “Why me?” 
I hear Damon groan from his end as if all my questions are annoying him, “For some reason, the suited one has a soft spot for you so I’m guessing he would be less inclined to kill me with you at my side. So get your ass ready and be ready or I’ll drag you to the party in your PJs,” Damon pauses for a moment, “You know what, feel free to wear what you’re wearing now. I'm interested to know what you wear to sleep. If anything at all.”
I loudly gag and Damon laughs and then ends our call. I groan and sit up. I turn over my shoulder to see Caroline and Bonnie cuddling together and sleeping. I slightly smile at the sight but freeze up. Elijah. I’m seeing Elijah today. 
“Well, don’t you look darling,” Damon smirks at me as I get into the passenger seat of his Mustang, “Elijah’s going to eat you right up.” 
I visibly shake at his words and shoot him a glare.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about. Elijah doesn’t have a soft spot for me.”
Damon just hums to himself, “Sure. Whatever you say Pukerella.”
As we climb the stairs of the Mayor’s house I nervously fiddle with the hem of my dress. I tried my best to find something suitable for the Mayor’s tea party but unfortunately, I didn’t have the funds for expensive beautiful dresses like my peers so I had to settle for a simple white sundress that stops at my mid-thigh. There is dark red lacing that lines the hem. I matched the red thread to a hair ribbon I had and used that to put my hair up. What is making me the most uncomfortable though is that I got this dress a long time ago, so I’ve filled it out in places that are quite visible. 
“Stop fiddling,” Damon says as he grabs my arm in his and holds it to his chest like we’re some cute couple and he’s a gentleman. Both are very much false. I try to shake away from him but his grip only tightens. He leads us up the steps and through the door where classical music fills the room. Many old women converse together as we pass.
“Damon and Y/N, what are you guys doing here?” Jenna questions him as she walks over to us, she notices me and a look of confusion contorts her face as she notices our interlocked hands.
“Hi, you came,” Some blonde woman comes up to Damon and kisses him deeply on the lips resulting in a gag from me. Thankfully the distraction made Damon unlatch his arm from mine so I squeezed past them and go to stand behind Jenna. This doesn’t last long as Damon thanks Jenna for introducing him and his “friend,” as he walks back over to me grabbing my arm and leading me away from them. I almost trip when I see where Damon is leading us. Right towards Ms. Lockwood and Elijah who is unsurprisingly wearing a suit that looks like it was made just for him, which I’m guessing it was. I lock eyes with him and his lips turn upwards into a small smile but it slightly drops as his gaze drops down to my dress. 
Damon and Ms. Lockwood achieve pleasantries and she introduces Damon to Elijah, who still has his eyes locked on me. Damon pulls me closer to him which catches Elijah’s attention. His once soft eyes darken as he stares at the arm Damon has wrapped around my waist.
“Such a pleasure to meet you,” Damon extends a hand to Elijah and I feel as if I’ve lost all the air in my lungs as Elijah reaches his hand up to Damon’s.
“No. Pleasure’s mine,” Elijah claims but as I notice the grimace on Damon’s face as he contracts his now-redden hand from Elijah’s I’m guessing he’s not being entirely truthful. 
“And oh! Y/N, I didn’t know you were going to be joining us today,” Carol finally notices me as she gives me a once over, “This doesn’t really seem like your crowd.”
I bite back the urge to tell her I’d rather be sticking pin-needles in my eye sockets than have to listen to any of the pompous bitches, but just politely smile at her. 
“Oh, Miss. Y/L/N here is my plus one,” Damon chimes up. Carol looks at me suspiciously as if I shouldn’t be here. 
“I didn’t know you and Y/N were friends.”
Damon throws his arm around my shoulder and pulls me closer to him, “Oh, yes. We’re great friends. Practically best friends if you will.” Carol just nods her head as if she doesn’t completely believe it but relents as she turns to Elijah who hasn’t moved his eyes from Damon’s hand. With all the attention my skin starts to crawl and I raise my left foot slightly and kick it down onto Damon’s right one resulting in a painful hiss to escape his lips. His hand instantly drops from my shoulder and within a moment I feel another hand lightly grab my wrist and pull me away from Damon. I’m almost happy until I see the hand that has grabbed me belongs to no other than Elijah. For some reason though as soon as he has pulled me away from Damon he drops my wrist and lets me stand on my own. I know I shouldn’t but I send him an appreciative smile. For a moment Elijah just stares at me blankly before nodding his head, he quickly turns his attention back to Ms. Lockwood but before he’s fully turned away from me I could’ve sworn I saw a light pink hue on his cheeks. Was he blushing? Wait. can vampires even blush?
“This is a bad idea, why are you trying to provoke an old ass vampire who could quite literally kill everyone in this building within a blink of an eye,” I frantically ask Damon as he leads me into an empty office in the Mayor’s house. 
“He’s not going to kill us, he made a deal,” Damon responds nonchalantly but from the look in his eyes, I don’t think he truly believes himself either. 
“You’re quite right Damon, I did make a deal,” I whip around to see Elijah coming into the office and shutting the door behind him, “But, I made a deal with Elena, not you. So tell me, what can I help you with?”
“I was hoping we could have a word,” Damon smirks at him.
“Where is Elena?”
“Safe with Stefan. Laying low, you know bit of a werewolf problem,” Damon answers his question. Elijah nods his head. And my eyes watch as his fingers draw circles on the chair he’s leaning on. 
“Oh, yeah. I heard about that,” Elijah responds and I glance up from his hands to see him staring at me with a small smirk on his face. Fuck, please god tell me he didn’t see me ogling his fucking fingers. He taps his index and pointer finger twice on the leather seat in front of him once more as if he knows that’ll answer the question I just asked myself. I whip my view from him to the wall beside me as Damon and Elijah keep talking. Although I can't see him I can still feel Elijah’s eyes burning holes onto the side of my head. 
“I’m sure you did since it was your witch who saved the day.”
“You are welcome.”
“Which adds to my confusion on exactly why you’re here,” Damon stop fucking questioning him before he rips your throat out!
“Why don’t you just stay focused on keeping Elena safe and leave the rest to me,” Elijah turns like he’s about to leave and I release a breath but Damon speeds in front of him stopping him.
“Not good enough.”
I sit there holding my breath, as Elijah stands there still looking at Damon.
“Elskan,” Elijah turns his head to glance at me, “Please turn back to the wall.” 
I don’t fight him on this as I whip back around and continue staring at the wall I had previously stared at. I flinch when I hear Damon hit the wall by the desk. I almost gag when I hear the sound of bones cracking and Damon grunting in pain. 
“You young vampires, so arrogant. How dare you come in here and challenge me?”
“You can’t kill me, man. It’s not part of the deal.”
“Silence,” Within another second a squelching sound hits my ears and Damon starts grunting in pain. I’m glad Elijah gave me the heads up or I’d be throwing up right now. 
“I’m an original. Show a little respect. The moment you cease to be of use to me, you’re dead. So, you should do what I say. Keep Elena safe.”
I hear Elijah’s footsteps retreat towards to door but I hold my breath as they stop.
“Elskan,” I slowly turn and quickly avert my gaze from the bloody Damon and look up at Elijah who is standing at the door, “I will be seeing you shortly.” He stares at me momentarily before speeding away. What the fuck was that supposed to mean?
“Why am I here again,” I question Damon as he leads me and Alaric into his mansion of a house. 
“Because I needed a drink asap,” He turns over his shoulder to look at me, “Unless you’re offering?” 
I cringe in disgust as Alaric comes to stand in front of me. 
“Leave her alone Damon,” Damon just rolls his eyes and makes his way to the couch, and pours himself a drink.
“Let me talk to him for a few minutes then I’ll take you home myself,” Alaric sends me a small smile, and even though I know there are no bad intentions in his proposition being alone with an older man I barely know unsettles me. But since it’s getting dark outside and I live on the outskirts of town, I need a ride. Better a history teacher than an alcoholic vampire. 
“Ok, thanks,” I send him a small smile and then turn to Damon, “Where’s your bathroom?” I glance down the neverending hallway.
Damon throws his hand up and waves it around nonchalantly, “There’s like 30 of them, go hunting.” Alaric sends me a sad smile and gestures towards the hallway to our right. I nod and walk away from the men 
After five minutes of walking down hallways and opening up random doors, I find myself in a bathroom bigger than my entire living room. Fucking rich people. After using the bathroom and wiping my face with water to try to wake myself up I start walking back towards where I think the living room was. I freeze though when I notice I don’t hear Damon’s annoying voice, matter of fact I don’t hear anything at all. I get a bad feeling in my gut so I go to turn back around but something smashes into my skull and the world goes black. 
— 
“Ah, there she is. Morning sweetheart,” I frown as an unfamiliar voice grates my eardrums. Mixed with the pounding headache I have I think I’m going to be sick. God, I have got to start taking Tums. I try to move but something cold and heavy is holding me back. I slowly open my eyes to see chains wrapped around me holding me in place in a chair. No matter how hard I try they won’t budge. 
“Aren’t you a pretty little thing,” A man’s voice registers as I look up to see an ugly-looking man staring down at me. The look in his eyes makes my heart drop to my ass. I flinch back as he drags his finger down my face and fight the urge to cry as the finger makes its descent down toward to center of my chest. 
“Leave her alone,” Damon, who I’ve now realized is sitting next to me chained up and bloody, yells at the man. The man only laughs sickly but thankfully lifts his hands away from me.
“Don’t worry, I’m not going to hurt her,” He claims but the look in his eyes has me thinking otherwise. Damon must think this as well because he lets out a low growl. 
“He might not hurt her but I will,” I woman’s voice chimes in but before I can find where it’s coming from a sharp pain slashes into my leg and I scream out as waves of agony wash over me. Damon’s yells are all I hear as I look down to my thigh which now has a small dagger in it. Tears involuntarily spill out of my eyes as my blurry vision looks up to see my assailant. A blonde woman stares down at me with a smile, but nothing about it is friendly and warm. Her smile deepens as she reaches her hand back down and within another moment I’m screaming again as she pulls the knife from my leg. 
“You fucking bitch,” I cry out, resulting in a deep laugh from her. 
“Hey, fleabag! Leave her alone alright, I’m the one who pissed all over your kibble, come stab me.” Damon tries to coax the woman. 
She just smiles again, “We want the moonstone. Where is it?”
“Get over it, honey. You’re never going to get it.”
I verbally groan at Damon’s response and try to fight back against the waves of tiredness of feeling. I know with the amount of blood I’m losing that if I go to sleep now I’m most likely not waking up. And there’s no way I’m letting this bitch with dead ends be the reason I meet my demise. 
“Looking for this,” I almost let out a cry of relief as I looked up to see Elijah leaning against a wooden pillar. His nonchalant attitude instantly changes as I catch his eye. His dark eyes furiously move over my face, his nose crinkles (almost cutely), and his eyes look down to my bleeding thigh. My once-white dress is now as red as the ribbon in my hair. 
I try to stay awake as Elijah makes his way down the staircase with the stone in his hands. My eyes keep opening and shutting though as my vision keeps blurring. I hear bits and pieces of screams and bones cracking before I feel the weight of the chains around me disappear and a warm hand raises to my lips. 
“That’s my girl, come now Elskan. Drink.”
I wake up in my bed with a loud groan. My hands stretch out beside me as I feel the white fabric of the comforter. Wait. White? I quickly sit up and instantly regret it as a wash-up pain flows through my body. But the fear that I had just awoken in a bed that is not my trumps that pain. What the fuck happened last night? “You’re awake, wonderful,” A deep voice comes from the edge of the room, “We have much to discuss, Elskan.”
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cowgirlcasanova · 16 days
Text
LIQUOR & LONLINESS
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pairing | arthur morgan x fem! oc
summary | arthur sees caroline alone by the fire and gives her some company. caroline can’t stand seeing him so exhausted and tries to take some weight off his shoulders
tags | fluff, flirting but everyone denies it, two idiots pretending not to be in love, fireside chat, massage, cute nervous arthur
word count | 2.5k
a/n | hi bffs! this is my first time ever publishing a fic! i’ve been trying to get back into creative writing again so here we are. please be nice to me ok? :)
i plan on publishing more arthur fics with this oc, building up their world/relationship & revealing her backstory. i just always think it’s so fun to read about ocs so i thought i’d give it a try! so this is a little introduction. hope you like it <3
A small sliver of the moon peeked through the clouds reflecting off the bay surrounding Clemens Point.
The glow of the moon and the dying firelight contrasted beautifully on Carolines face, something Arthur couldn’t help but take notice of as he gazed at her from under the awning of his wagon.
He couldn’t force himself to revert his gaze, completely enthralled by the way the shadows danced across her at the smallest of movements. He was already picturing the angle in which he’d have to move his pencil to even attempt at sketching the sight of the warm and cool light dueling on her face. Arthur cursed himself under his breath at the mere thought of filling another page in his journal with her face, something he’d found himself doing far too often these days.
“Arthur you miserable fool.” He muttered to himself, grimacing as he stretched out his overworked body and rose off his cot.
Caroline sat alone, unsure if the heat she was feeling was radiating from the ebbing fire or from the burn of the dark liquor making its way through her system. She stuck to taking small sips of her glass of bourbon, feeling a strange guilt for drinking it in the first place.
As the only member of the Van Der Linde gang to have advanced medical knowledge it all fell on her to heal their various ailments. She often had just enough supplies to keep everyone afloat, but having the law after you constantly made it a challenge to get your hands on much needed medicine. So, she’d save what she could and turn to liquor as her medicine of choice, trying to save all the expensive tonics and remedies for the traumas that really needed it. Bill complaining of a back injury? Whiskey. The days that Hosea's cough seemed to worsen? Whiskey. Even using whiskey as a last ditch effort to warm John after his wolf attack. She always tried her best to stay out of her own medicinal stash of liquor, But, some nights she wanted the peace that came with the burn of whiskey. Tonight was one of those nights.
“Hey there, Miss Caroline.” Arthurs gruff voice breaks through the unusually silent night. The smell of the burning fire filled his nose as he got closer. He approaches her with a courteous nod, running a hand across his growing stubble.
“Mind if I join ya?” He removed his banged up hat, holding it close over his chest, a small sign of respect toward the lady that did go unnoticed by her. Rarely anything he did went unnoticed by her.
She smiled up at him with the warm smile she always wore, but something about it made him feel like that sweet smile was just for him everytime. Though he’d never let himself believe something as foolish as that. When she turned to look at him the shadows on her face stopped battling and the warm light of the fire covered her completely. From Arthurs vantage point it almost looked as if she was glowing.
“Please do.”
He moves as gently as he can for his size, taking his seat next to her on the old log the gang has fashioned into a bench. His usual confidence was tempered by something softer while next to her. His leg brushes against her knee, as he sits down, a reminder of how close you two are. The weight of his knee was pushing the scratchy material of her skirt against her leg and yet, she can’t bring herself to move her leg away from the tiny space they share. In the harsh life she's suddenly found herself thrown into, although by her own actions. She finds herself craving affection and touch more and more everyday. A gentle touch. Not a casual pat on the shoulder from Dutch or a clap on the back from Sean. Something with meaning behind it, with care and tenderness.
When Arthurs leg stays planted firmly, their knees barely brushing, her heart aches at the thought that the ever so tough man beside her may be feeling the same.
"you doin’ alright this evenin’, caroline?” He asks, his voice softer than usual. His eyes moved across her face, taking in the closeness and her warmth that he was now admiring up close.
“Im doin’ just fine. How ‘bout yourself?” Her sickeningly sweet southern accent hits his ears, making him unable to stop a smile from tugging at his lips.
“I’ve been worse.”
“Long day I take it?” She asks, sipping from her glass, not diverting her gaze from him. Her face takes on a concerned expression. He has to glance away from the look she gives him, deflecting his eyes to the fire. Something about the way she looked at him always seemed so soft and genuine. It turned him into a fool everytime.
“Ain’t they all.” He drawls, letting out a self deprecating chuckle.
Arthur stretches out his sore, muscled arms in front of him in an effort to work out the constant deep ache that his overworked body feels. His biceps flex through the thin material of his button up shirt, the material looking like it could give way any moment, unintentionally drawing Caroline's eye. Her heart speeds up as she takes another sip from her glass, doing her best to quiet her thoughts of him with liquor. A quiet, painful groan slips from his mouth at the movement. He closes his eyes and rolls his neck to try and soothe discomfort.
“Did’ya hurt yourself?” She asks swiftly, her voice filling with immediate concern. Arthur scolded himself, trying to push down the warmth he felt over her worrying for him. It was her job.
His eyes warmed at her concern, making her wonder if it was the pain or her that caused the change. She hoped it was the latter. “my shoulder just been actin’ up on me. nothin’ for you to fuss about.”
“Well, if ya keep throwin’ your weight around it ain’t never gon’ heal.” She laughed softly, shaking her head as if she was scolding the tough and hardened man beside her.
He made a sound somewhere between a chuckle and a groan, hating to be reminded of how often he seemed to be caught in some violent altercation nowadays. He hated it more coming from Caroline, the sweetest woman he knows. He couldn't help but feel like she should loathe him and this life. That she should turn heel and run while she still had a chance at a good life. Maybe even being able to settle down with a rich man somewhere, raise a family. The things a woman like her should be able to do. Not running with a gang of criminals.
“It ain’t the “throwing my weight around,” He says chuckling, repeating her choice of wording. “I’m just gettin’ old”
“Oh, you are not gettin’ old you silly man!” She whacked his arm playfully, the sound making a weak thump because of her carefulness, taking extra precaution to hit his forearm and not his sore shoulder.
All he musters out is a small lighthearted scoff at her strike, which felt more like a love tap.
“It ain’t age! It's all that punchin’ you're doing.” A weak attempt at chastising him, but she's not able to keep the smile off her lips long enough. “And yes, I did hear about that fight at the saloon.”
He looked over at her and the way she clicked her tongue in disapproval. She was still wearing that same smile. He couldn’t help but chuckle when she raised her eyebrows at him, the expression playfully reprimanding him and silently telling him that she was owed an answer.
“Yeah, I guessed you would’ve heard about it. But, they were was askin’ for it.” He felt an odd sense of understanding when she didn’t disagree with him but instead laughed and shook her head affectionately. “I'm sure they was.” Maybe she didn’t see him and his life as horribly as he thought.
“I guess maybe I can be a hotheaded fool sometimes.” He spoke, berating himself under the appearance of a good humored joke.
“That you certainly can be.” She chuckled, with a warm grin. He heard no malice in her words.
The way Arthur sits with his shoulders hunched forward, It's obvious he’s tired, sore, and overworked. It breaks her heart, the way he does so much for others here just to end up sitting here aching internally and externally.
“C’mere,” She gestures to the dirt ground under her feet. “Let me see what I can do for ya.” the pleading in her voice sounds like this is just as much for her as it is for him.
He doesn't want to. Making her work for him? No, it should be the other way. For a girl like her, he should be spending every waking minute running around making sure she has everything she could possibly want.
Before he can turn down her offer, she snaps her fingers, pointing at the same spot. She won't allow him to put himself last this time.
“Yes ma’am” He chuckles at her unusual assertiveness.
She carefully lays her hand on his shoulder, as if she was checking to make sure he wouldn’t flee like a wild horse the moment he felt her touch. Once certain, she rolls the pad of her thumb over his sore muscle, taking great care to be gentle. Like there was something she cherished under hands. The fabric of his shirt moves along with the movement of her thumb, stopping her hands from being able to touch his skin.
His broad shoulders relax under her touch, goosebumps rising over his skin when she touches him so delicately. He’s grateful for the shirt covering him so she can’t feel the way his skin reacts so easily to her touch. His head hangs forward as he lets out a quiet groan of contentment, relishing in the feeling. Whether it's the feeling of the sore muscle being worked loose or the feeling of being cared for so sweetly he’s not so sure. She peers down at his face and sees his eyes flutter closed as she continues her soothing movement. Her eyes were stuck on his face as he relaxed for the first time.
The smile lines around his mouth made it obvious he wore a warm expression often no matter how tough he looked at a moment's glance. His aging eyes were developing small wrinkles on the outer corners from years of squinting in the sun and all the times his bountiful laugh trailed up to his eyes. He always smelled of tobacco and ash, even his scent exuded warmth if you're able to get close enough to notice.
Arthur Morgan, The man who could make statues talk. He didn’t look intimidating to her, he rarely ever did but, especially not in the vulnerable position she’s seeing him in now. In their closeness, she could see the way the longer pieces of his growing stubble had a small curl to them, The way he had a few tiny freckles across the bridge of his nose, presumably from being in the sun his whole life. She realized he didn’t look so sad for once, he looked peaceful. And she was the one making him feel that way.
“That helpin’ at all?” She asks quietly, close enough to him that he feels her breath against his ear.
He nods sleepily, angling his neck to the left to stretch the muscle she’s working on. With the more exposed area, she runs her thumb along his neck, landing just under his jaw bone. He lets out a low, content murmur to answer her. “Mhmm” With her hands on him, she can feel the vibration of his rumble throughout her.
“Alrigh’, jus’ relax.” She whispers, her calm voice mixing with the sound of the crackling fire and the waves of the bay lapping quietly.
He lets out quiet, low groans here and there. The rumble in his voice suggests the sound is emanating from somewhere deep in his chest. His head hangs in his calm state, being enveloped in warm light.
Although this was meant to help him, she could feel it soothing her as well. She craved tenderness so deeply that this moment felt like a relief from all the toughness around her. She wasn’t just offering gentleness, she was receiving it. Arthur trusted her touch and surrendered to it. In this intimate moment, he let her be gentle and soft. For now that’s what she needed.
Even though his hands weren't on her at all, she felt as though they may as well could've been.
“That should help it at least.” She feathers her massage off, now just gently running a soothing hand over the muscle. “I don’t wanna end up aggravatin’ it more.”
He rolls his neck as he stands back up, positioning himself on the log once more. “Felt real nice. Thank ya” She feels his hand pat against her knee, gently squeezing it. Her leg felt cold after the loss of contact, even through a layer of fabric. A chill goes through her entire body. She's grateful for the long skirt covering her legs so he can’t feel the goosebumps across them.
“Don't mention it.” She says dismissively, although her heart is hammering in her chest. She takes a sip from her glass hoping he’ll believe the alcohol is the reason for the redness washing over the apples of her cheeks. “Just glad it did ya some good.”
“You’re a damn fine nurse, Caroline” A smile tugs at the corners of his mouth, looking almost jovial in nature. He doesn’t look so tense anymore. His shoulders fall in a more relaxed manner and the fire casts long bronze shadows over him, creating contours on his face that give his usually piercing eyes a new kind of gentleness.
“Well thank you Mr. Morgan” She beams at him, happy that her work is noticed. Especially by him. She’s constantly half exhausted with all she does in camp, fixing every small ailment that anyone complains of. And yet, shes not bringing in money or doing “domestic chores” so, Grimshaw sees no worth in her. “I do my best to keep you boys alive.” She laughs.
He scoffs with a lighthearted chuckle at her calling him “Mr. Morgan” He turns his gaze to the fire, watching it dance for a few moments before his eyes flicker down to his hands, looking at them with distant thought. “We’d probably be in a lot worse shape without ya…”
“Oh, I don’t know about that.” She laughs bashfully. She’s never been one to accept a compliment easily. But, something about the sincerity his voice holds always manages to make her consider that it could be the truth. She laughs again, shaking her head as if she was physically shaking the thought out. “Now, any other ways you’ve gone and gotten yourself hurt that I should know about?” Her eyebrows raise playfully.
The same scoff leaves his mouth, along with a low chuckle. “No, nothin’ else. Not now at least.”
“Well stop goin’ and gettin’ yourself hurt and maybe it’ll stay that way.” A warm smile bloomed across her face. He couldn’t help but notice the way a small crinkle formed across the bridge of her nose when she laughed. The sight captivated him too much, she seemed almost holy to him.
“I’ll try. No promises” He said with a chuckle that sounded from deep within his chest. “But, I'll try for you.”
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acewritesfics · 10 months
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Call Me Tommy | TOMMY SHELBY
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⚠️ THIS IS A REPOST FROM MY MAIN BLOG @/DLMLUFICS. UNFORTUNATELY, I HAVE TO DO IT THIS WAY. MORE INFO IN MY PINNED POST. ⚠️
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Pairing: Tommy Shelby x Reader
Fic Type: Imagine.
Request: No.
Warnings: There's a little swearing. Rose is the name of Tommy and Reader's daughter, Caroline is the name of Rose's daughter (Tommy's and Reader's granddaughter) and Jennifer is the name of Caroline's Daughter (Tommy and Reader's great-granddaughter), hopefully that all makes sense. Grace and Charlie did happen but Lizzie and Ruby didn't because that would have added more confusion for me. There is also names for Reader's siblings. This isn't meant to be cannon in any way, shape, or form. ITALICS ARE FLASHBACK'S TO 1925 
Word Count: 1,969
TOMMY SHELBY MASTERLIST
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Jennifer walks into her elderly grandmother's room at the rest home. Though the 92 year old doesn't remember much from the last 60 years, Jennifer still loved visiting her Grandma Rose. She enjoys listening to the stories Rose tells her, ever since the young 30 year old woman was a child. Her Grandma Rose told the best stories and in the best way. And Rose never forgot telling them to her. It was one of her memories that refuses to fade. 
"Good morning, Grandma Rose," The young woman greets her grandmother with a warm smile and kiss to her cheek.  
"Good morning, Jenny," the elderly woman smiles, her eyes lighting up seeing her youngest grandchild, the one she's always been closest too and the only one who name hasn't left her mind. All her other grandchildren were familiar faces that didn't visit her as often as Jenny does. 
"How are you feeling today?" Jenny asks taking a seat across from her at the small table in her room. 
"About the same," she replies. "How's your mother?"  
Jenny's mother, Caroline, is Rose's second child and her first daughter. Her uncle, Rose's oldest and only son, died a few years ago from an illness and her younger daughter died when she was just a baby. 
"She's good, she's hoping to come see you next week," she informs her though she knows she won't remember it by time tomorrow comes. "She found something for me to show you," she reaches into her handbag, pulling out an envelope. Opening the envelope, she takes out the three photos that are inside and lays them on the table facing Grandma Rose. "Mum found these in the attic and thought you might like them." 
A smile graces Rose's lips as tears build up in her eyes looking at the photos with so much love that it makes Jenny feel emotional.  
The first photo was of a young woman who couldn't be much older than Jenny is now. The second photo is the same woman with a handsome man, on what looked to be their wedding day, instead of looking at the camera. They were gazing at each other with so much love and adoration it makes Jenny's heart melt. The third photo was the same couple, a little older, with a baby girl sitting on the woman's knee, and a boy who couldn't be more than 10 standing beside her as the man stood behind her with one hands on her shoulder and the other on the boys shoulder. 
"This was my mother, Y/N," Rose tells Jenny as she picks up the photo of the woman. "This was before she met my father. Her first husband died in the war. She was only 23. They weren't married more than 6 months. It took her a long time to want to love again and then my father came along. He was a widow himself, with a son, my half-brother Charlie. Do you remember your Uncle Charlie?" 
Jenny smiles fondly remember the elderly man that always snuck her treats as she grew up. He had passed five years ago. "He was a lovely man. You both never spoke much of your parents. How did they meet?" 
"My mother always said it was fate," She says, her eyes moving to the photo of the married couple as she picks it up. "They met back in 1925..." 
Y/N was growing frustrated with Adam, her older brother, as she stands in the only suit shop there is in Small Heath, Birmingham. The 34-year-old didn't want to be here in the first place but of course Adam needed a woman's opinion on the suit that was currently being tailored for him. She doesn't understand why he needed a new suit when he has plenty at home. He told her he didn't have a date or that he wasn't going any where fancy, that he just needs one and that should be enough of an explanation. 
Leaving Adam to be tailored, she looks around the ready made suits to see if she could find one she likes for him. Nothing in particular catches her eye. They all looked the same to her but she was no expert on fashion. If it hadn't been for their older sister, Edith, growing up, she wouldn't know how to dress herself appropriately, let alone someone else.  
"You would have been better off bringing Edith instead of me," she calls to Adam moving the suits along the rack, "Or better yet that girl you fancy. That's why you want the suit, isn't it?" 
"You really thought you were my first choice to bring with me?" he teases and winces after the tailor purposely pokes him with a needle. "Edith was busy with her children." 
Edith is almost forty and pregnant with her and her husband's 8th child. Y/N is lost on how Edith could do it, popping out babies all the time. Edith's oldest child, a boy who's 17-years-old, the youngest, a daughter, is 2-years-old. She's due to have her 8th baby in two months.  
"And the girl I fancy, is out of town for the week," Adam continues. "I know you don't understand this because you haven't put yourself out there in 10 years, but this suit is going to help me finally ask her on a date." 
"Is the suit going to ask her for you?" she teases her brother, earning a chuckle from the tailor.  
"For your information my dear little sister, suits give a man a certain confidence like a woman with a beautiful dress that was made just for her," he states confidently. "And at least I'm trying to date. You're almost 35, with no husband and no children, you're a spinster." He winces again as the tailor pokes him even harder this time. 
"I'm a widow actually. You're the one who's never been married," she growls at him coming to where he's standing. "Why is it okay for you men to sleep with any woman you want and not have to consider marriage or having a family? But when a woman my age isn't married with children, we're spinsters and unlovable?" She ignores the smirk on the tailor's face as she directs her glare at her brother. "You know what, you're on your own." 
She turns on her heel and goes to storm out the door when she bumps right into another person, almost knocking herself back on her bottom. Lucky for her, the person's hands find her waist stopping her from falling backwards. "I am so so-" 
She is cut off when her eyes connect with eyes so vividly blue that she could drown in them.  
"Sorry," she finishes barely above a whisper, as though the air in her lungs have gone.  
"Don't apologise," he tells her. "Are you all right?" 
She nods unable to find her voice. She's never met a man with such beautiful eyes. She feels herself enchanted by them. When he removes his hands from her, a coldness settles over her. It wasn't until then that she noticed how warmth she felt when he was touching her.  
Finding her voice, she decides to introduce herself, holding her hand out towards him. "My name is Y/N L/N." 
"Thomas Shelby," he introduces himself taking her hand in his, the warm feeling returning to her. "Call me Tommy." 
"Mr Shelby!" the tailor calls to the man in front of her. "I won't be a minute." 
Tommy nods towards the man, before looking back at Y/N. "It was lovely to meet you, Ms. L/N."  
"It was lovely to meet you too, Mr Shelby," she agrees. 
He gives her a small polite smile and moves past her to go towards the tailor. She watches him for a moment, taking him all in, from the way he walks to how he stands, to his mannerisms when he speaks and listens. She didn't know him at all but there was something about him that drew her in, and it wasn't just his beautiful ocean blue eyes. She finds herself wanting to know him and everything about him. Little did she know that he was feeling the same about her. 
It was at this moment, her brother, fully dressed joins her. "I'm sorry for what I said. I'm just worried for you, sister. I don't want you to end up like mother when father died. I don't want you to end up alone." 
"You don't need to worry about me," she tells him as Tommy's eyes connect with her own. She feels her heart skip a bit and her breath catch in her lungs but manages to look away from the handsome man, with his high cheek bones, plump lips and beautiful eyes. 
Her brother notices what's happening and lets out a small groan as he pulls her out of the suit shop "Of course the first man to take your fancy after 10 years is none other than Thomas Fuckin' Shelby." 
"You know him?" her gaze snaps to Adam as they walk towards their shared home.  
"How do you not know who he is?" he answers with his own question, looking at her like she's grown three heads. "Everyone from Birmingham knows who he is."  
"We're not from Birmingham, are we?" she scoffs. "So who is he?" 
"He's the fuckin' King of Birmingham. Leader of the Peaky Blinders."  
"Well, that just makes him even more interesting," she mumbles more to herself as she gazes back towards the shop, hoping to see another glimpse of the handsome gangster. 
"Your Great-Grandfather had quite the reputation in Birmingham, even in London. A lot of people would say he was ruthless, cold, demeaning and a lot of other bad words and he was those things but he was also very smart, caring, loyal and he loved my mother completely. She was his Queen and he treated her like one. Everything he did was for us and the rest of his family," Grandma Rose explains after telling the story of how her parents met. "You look him up on that computer thing you have, but don't believe everything you read. The coppers had it out for him and tried to make him out to be the worst human being they had met. But there was also someone out there much worse than him." 
"Do you think about them often?" Jenny asks her. 
She nods, "All the time, more so now since I'll be joining them and Charlie soon." 
"Hopefully not too soon," Jenny smiles sadly. The thought of losing her Grandma Rose breaks her heart. 
Rose reaches out to hold her granddaughter's hand. "I want you to keep the photos. They would love for you to have them. You look just like her." 
"My mother? I know." She gives her hand a gentle squeeze, hearing the words Rose always told her, more so now that she was losing her mind. 
"No, not Caroline. My mother, Y/N. You look just like her but you have my father's eyes. Those beautiful blue ones that could drown someone in them," Rose smiles and stands up from her chair. "I love you Jennifer, don't ever forget that." 
"I won't," Jenny says as she helps the elderly woman into her bed. "I love you too, Grandma Rose." She places a kiss to her cheek and goes back to the table, looking at the photos once more as she picks them up and puts them back inside the envelope.  
Jenny looks back to her grandmother who's already drifted off to sleep and smiles. She goes back over to her and places a kiss on her forehead before leaving the room, closing the door behind her. The first she decides to do as she leaves the rest home is to look up Thomas Shelby, her great-grandfather. 
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CREDIT: Razorblade and dots dividers made by me. Peaky Blinders divider made by @/firefly-graphics. Support divider made by @/cafekitsune.
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TAGGED: @forgottenpeakywriter | @rainydayteacups | @bernelflo
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klonnieshippersclub · 6 months
Note
Looking at your last reblog I never peeped Michael Trevino’s eyebrow lift and side gaze at Joseph pushing Klonnie…can you imagine Tyler being forced to be the wingman for Klaus?
Suddenly, I'm feeling creative. I haven't written a drabble or a fic concept in a while. I couldn’t help but try this as a prompt. First, check out my previous ask here (TLDR: Klaus and his inner wolf being thirsty as hell for Bonnie) on the inspo behind this post:
Red Moon, Red Roses
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Klaus watches her. His eyes follow her every move. The Bennett witch doesn't know he's there (or does she?), but he makes note of all his observations in his mind. What started his sudden fascination with her? It was Rebekah and a throwaway remark about her friends needing Bonnie more than she needed them. It was true. Without her, they had nothing. With the distance growing between Bonnie and her friends, his world was filled with possibilities. Could he recruit her? Attack her? Charm her? Kill her? Seduce her?
He lies to himself about not knowing what he wants from the girl. His inner wolf was screaming at him. It was the night of the red moon that he crawled himself to her. He fought his wolf, but Klaus couldn't resist the siren's call. Those golden eyes trailed her every move. The girl- The woman wore a long, thin nightgown and gently applied lotion to her body. He could practically smell her skin. Roses.
He knew the truth. Bonnie was his heart's desire. Klaus' wolf wanted nothing more than to knock on her door, but he couldn't. The vampire kept him away. He couldn't do it. He refused to be rejected and be unwanted again. Before leaving, he plucks a flower from her garden (the same one she used to make perfume). He drags himself home and finds himself being questioned by his hybrids in the morning. Where was he? He wouldn't tell them. It wasn't until Tyler suspiciously commented that he smells like Bonnie that Klaus' hopes rise.
Tyler was her friend. They weren't particularly close, but Bonnie cared for him. Klaus remembered her concern when he turned the Lockwood boy. Tyler was not a threat to him as a potential rival for his beloved. However, he could be an asset. Tyler was Klaus' way in. The wolf was his chance to be closer to Bonnie. Tyler would help him willingly or not. The football player reluctantly agrees to assist Klaus in his pursuit of Bonnie. Tyler knew it would be hard to convince Bonnie to give the Original a chance, but he'd do anything to keep Klaus from looking at Caroline.
Watch out, Bonnie. Klaus is coming for your heart.
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manicpixiedreamcurl · 2 years
Text
The More You Give ❧ (Part V)
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Pairing | Eddie x reader
Warnings | 18+ minors and blank blogs don’t interact, bullying, friendship comes and goes, discussions of anxiety, discussions of virginity, discussions of sex shaming, frottage (PUSSYJOB), everyone’s very vulnerable.
Word count | ~11,800
A/N | Oooh, mama. It’s been a while. I hope most of the people who like this fic are still around.
Taglist
Previous Chapter
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You like calling Eddie, the sound of his voice over the phone. The way he answers it differently each time:
“This is Eddie Munson, lead guitarist of Corroded Coffin; available for christenings, bar mitzvahs and weddings.”
“Munson residence. The old guy’s out so if you’re looking to buy a collection of novelty mugs now’s the time.”
“You’ve reached the church of Satan; Abaddon the Destroyer speaking. For your free introductory handbook on summoning circles just dial six-six-six.”
And then there’s the happy rise in his tone when he hears it’s you on the other side, the surprised laugh at the sound of your soft hi, Eddie even when he’d asked you to call. The crackle of his breath through the receiver, the way conversations with him are easy however they happen. With anyone else, phone calls feel stilted and awkward, but Eddie talks as if you’re sitting right in front of him. 
It makes you warm all over to think about. Eddie wants to see you and kiss you and touch you, but he’s also happy to sit on his couch miles away and speak to you, listen in return to everything you can bring yourself to say.
You have taken to dragging a chair from the kitchen and sitting by the hallway table to talk to him like this whenever you don’t see him in the evening. You spend an hour or two at a time smiling at your mom’s address book, twirling the coiled cord of the phone around your finger while Eddie talks about this day, asks about yours, explains why he’s really into this new Swedish black metal band he’s discovered, checks what you’re reading, shares an idea he has for Hellfire, plans your next date.
Today is no exception. Your dad has walked past muttering about the phone bill twice. Your mom, as usual, has stationed herself in the kitchen within earshot, but what exactly she gets out of hearing the low buzz of Eddie’s voice and your laughter, you don’t know.
"And you're sure you don't wanna come, sweet girl?" 
"Yeah, I-" You hesitate, playing with a rose petal from the bowl of potpourri that sits by the phone. "I think I should stay here. Just in case." 
In truth, you don't have much hope that May will call, but imagining that she does and you aren’t here to receive it fills you with worry. The last thing you want is to make things any worse between you after you messed up so badly. 
It’s not unusual for you to feel this type of regret. When overthinking something delays your actions until it’s too late. You worried so much about how to tell May about Eddie that you left it too long. You should have told her the day you kissed him, should have phoned when you got back from your first date. Instead, you spent your time imagining the conversation, and let your best friend find out something important through somebody else. 
You hurt her. She is wounded enough that she really has given up defending you. When Caroline remarks on your silence now, May doesn't attempt to fill the emptiness your lumping throat leaves. 
"She's just shy," May used to say, waving her hand. Her embarrassment over your stumbled words and fidgeting hands was clear, then, but you knew she felt for you, even if she didn't understand why she had to. Now she just looks at you expectedly like everyone else, pulls awkward, embarrassed faces when you stumble and fidget through a non-answer.
You had taken to spending more of your lunches helping Heather with her new responsibilities as class president, sitting quietly at debate club and nodding along to her speeches, taking the role of a small country at her model UN meetings. But you are starting to feel her frustration with you, too. 
“You don’t have to come to every meeting if you don’t enjoy it.” She said to you after the last UN encounter you’d sat through without uttering a word.
“It’s just, I don’t really know much about Anguilla. But I like hearing you speak.”
Heather smiled with her lips closed. “That’s not what it’s for, though. I think maybe you’d prefer having lunch with May and the cheerleading girls again.”
You felt your cheeks burning, pulled the sleeves of your cardigan down over your hands and fiddled with the woollen edges. “Oh. Okay. Yeah, you’re probably right.”
Sometimes you think about sitting at Eddie’s table instead. To have another hour of him every day. The picture is nice on its own. Talking to him, to Jeff, even the freshmen Eddie has adopted since the beginning of the year. But then the image zooms out; you at the Hellfire table, May with the cheerleaders, Heather at her clubs, and your chest aches. You don’t know when it happened, when you had to start holding on this tight, digging your nails into them. You only know you’ll leave claw marks on your friendship before you let it go easy.
And while you can never get enough Eddie, you aren’t normally deprived of him outside of the school walls. With anyone else, you might have worried about suffocating him, being clingy. But Eddie makes it clear at every turn how much he wants to be around you. His grin in the mornings when you climb into his van. The way he leans into your space, hair tickling your cheeks, and asks all soft and earnest if you want to go home with him. Some days, he invites you into the trailer to touch and taste you. Others, to sit on his couch or his bed and talk. Or to just spend hours just breathing the same air as him, listening to him scribble in his D&D notebook or strum at his guitar while you read or do your homework. 
But you won't see him tonight. Eddie is going to see Fright Night with most of the boys in his club, and it's all he's talked about the past week. He'd asked you to come, all wide brown eyes and dimples, and your stomach had twisted. 
"Normally May and I do something around this time each month." You hadn't been able to look him in the eye when you said it, fiddling with his hands instead. You'd rubbed the softness of your thumb over the callused pads of his fingers, knowing he had that look he'd been getting whenever you found yourself bringing your friend up. A little sad, guilt he shouldn't be feeling. Irritation, at you or at her you're not brave enough to ask. 
"You sure?" He asks over the phone now. "It'd be pretty easy for me to pick you up. I'm giving Wheeler a ride. He's just down the street from your place." 
You feel a wave of fondness for him, for the lie he’s just told. He isn’t aware that you know exactly where Mike Wheeler lives. You’ve babysat Holly since you were sixteen, and the route to her home takes half an hour in your dad's car. 
"I'm sure," you say, trying to sound firm. "But I hope you like the movie."
"If it's good, maybe we can see it together another time." 
"You wouldn't mind going twice?" 
"I'd watch the same movie twenty times in a row if you promised to come to the last one." He laughs, sounding enough like he means it that your smile hurts your cheeks. 
"That might be a touch excessive," you murmur. "Twice sounds like enough."
"How about tomorrow? We could get dinner first, make a real date out of it." 
Your face heats up like the first time Eddie asked you out. You touch your toe to your ankle, winding the cord of the phone tight around your finger. You whisper. "Okay."
"Yeah?" 
"Yeah." You press your knees together. "That sounds nice."
"Unless the movie's shit, then we'll have to call the whole thing off." You laugh down the phone, imagining the tease in Eddie’s smile. "I'll have a review for you by tomorrow, sweet thing."
"Okay, Eddie."
"And I'm not leaving for another ten minutes. If you change your mind, just call, okay?"
"Okay, Eddie," you repeat. "Have a nice time."
"See you soon, beautiful." 
Your toes curl. "See you soon." 
When he's gone and the phone is back in its holder, you have to sit tense and still for a second to avoid making some kind of happy squeal, settling for curling your fingers into your skirt and tapping your heels wildly against the floor. 
You still feel a little dizzy with the thought of him when you pull the chair back into the kitchen, enough that you jump when your mom speaks. "That Eddie on the phone?" 
You fix her with a look, because she knows exactly who you were talking to, and she gives you a mock innocent smile that shifts into a real one. 
“You were laughing a lot.”
Her hands drip soapy water from the kitchen sink, finishing up the dishes that would have been done ten minutes ago if she hadn't dragged it out for an excuse to stay where she could hear you. You chew the inside of your lip while you take the next freshly cleaned plate from her. Grabbing a dry dish cloth to drag across the ceramic, you shrug one shoulder. 
“He’s funny.”
“And you like that about him?”
“Mom.”
“Just a question!” She says, holding her hands up, before grabbing the dish towel from you to wipe her wet hands. “You talk more, when it’s him on the phone. Did you know that?”
“You listen to all my conversations?”
“I’m your mother,” she laughs, bumping your hip with hers. “And I’ve never heard you so chatty.” You give her another look and she reconsiders. "Chatty for you. There's been times I've rounded that corner surprised you were even on the phone, you're so quiet. I mean, with that last boy-” She hums a disapproving tone, reaches out to fix the collar of your cardigan. "I swear you'd sit there and not say anything at all."
“It's easier to talk to Eddie,” you admit, thinking about how pleased he looks when you ramble about what you're reading, the last kid you babysat, even the new eyeshadow palette you’d saved up for and felt a touch immature being so excited about. All his encouraging nods, all the questions and affirmations afterwards. "He's…" 
He’s a million good things. Too many to name, too many to put in order. You glance at her to the side, raising one shoulder. 
"I like him," she declares. "I think he's good for you." 
Your face is hot and uncomfortable, but it still feels nice to agree. "I think so, too." 
When the dishes are away and your mom is settled on the couch with your dad watching Quincy reruns, you walk slowly upstairs, hoping that the phone will ring again before your door closes. 
You make a bet with yourself in your head. If it rings before I get to my room, it’ll be May. It’ll be May and she’ll want to be friends again and everything will be alright. You reach the top, spy the door the end of the hall. Any time after, it’ll be somebody else; a sales call, a chatty relative. 
All you hear as you pad across the landing is your parents laughing at the TV. 
With your door closed, your heart sore, you glance at your desk on the other side of the room, the cork pin board behind it decorated with memories. There is your first concert ticket, next to a postcard from the first time you left this country by plane. An askew origami frog that a boy you used to babysit made for you. A pom-pom that detached from the winter hat you wore from October to March three years running in middle school. 
There is Heather. One photo as she is now, smiling at you over a yellow smoothie. Another couple from your first years together, at the edge of womanhood. Her in braces and her mother's lipstick, the aquamarine taffeta dress she wore to your first high school prom. 
And there is May. She is everywhere, over and over again, in all the stages of her life since you met. She is in pigtails, her small hand in yours, her gap toothed grin next to your close lipped smile. She is in this room, with sparkling eyelids, the earliest and most keen model for your interest. She is at the Spring fair of 1979, holding cotton candy you'd shared soon after the photo was taken. She is at that first concert, decked out in Wham! merchandise. Swim meets and cheer competitions. A line of photo booth strips. You are there with her; both giggling, eyes crossed and tongues rolled. 
May has been a constant in your life, but now your life has shifted. Maybe you have to accept that she doesn’t want to shift with it. 
The phone rings downstairs. 
You hear your dad huff, the sound of your mom rising from the couch and heading through the hall. You hold your breath, listen to the buzz of her landline specific voice, all breezy politeness. Then she calls your name.
You practically throw yourself down the stairs, slipping at the last couple in your socks. You have to hold yourself back from grabbing the phone from her. Taking just a second to glance over your shoulder to check that she's actually walking away, you whisper into the phone. “Hello?”
"Where are you? I rented Footloose." Tears prick in your eyes at the sound of May’s voice. You look up to the ceiling, silent for too long. “You still there?”
“Yes,” you breathe.
“Where are you?” She repeats. “Second Friday of the month. It’s movie night.”
“I didn’t-” You swallow, blinking tears away as they rise and trying not to sniffle. “I thought maybe you didn’t want to see me.”
"Of course I want to see you,” she answers. “You're my best friend."
You feel your bottom lip shaking, can’t fight the sniffles this time. You drag the sleeve of your cardigan across your eyes, voice cracking when you speak next. "You really mean it, May?"
"I’m inviting you round, aren’t I?” She says, sharp tone softened by a sigh crackling in your ear through the receiver. “Of course I mean it.” You hum a high sound, a stifled sob of relief, eyes squeezed shut. “Now, come watch Kevin Bacon shake his ass with me." 
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You are warm under the silken soft quilt pulled from May’s bed. Your stomach is heavy with buttered popcorn and gummy worms. Your skin is soft from the homemade face masks you made in her kitchen, singing along to Cyndi Lauper and listening to May read the recipe aloud from the newest YM magazine dropped on her doorstep just this morning.
Stirring oatmeal and yoghurt together like a potion, you felt a pang of nostalgia. For a second, you were seven years old, standing with May over a muddy puddle, your makeshift cauldron brimming with gathered leaves, stones, and red berries. You’d mix it up with long, gnarled twigs and cackle together like the witches. The mucky water wasn’t just mud, then. It was poison, it was love potion. It was magic, made together. 
Today, at eighteen, you glanced up at May’s concentrated face while she attempted to separate egg whites from yolks, and let yourself be soothed by the thought that maybe some things are still as they were. 
Footloose was abandoned after Kevin Bacon finished throwing himself rhythmically around an empty warehouse, May’s interest in it vanishing swiftly after that. You found yourself on the couch talking while the film played on in the background until the popcorn was finished and the oats could be washed from your face. 
Then May led you up to her room, almost as familiar to you as your own. 
The cream lambskin rug, still matted and stained in one corner from that time you’d spilt nail polish over it. Terrified you might not be allowed to come over anymore, May told her mom it was her, and she was grounded for a week. 
You bought her those fairy lights, the ones that hang above her bed. Last year, you wrapped them in pink tissue paper, felt the satisfying swell of a present well chosen when she’d hugged you tight with the box still in her hand. 
May has her own cork board. Amongst plastic medals and concert tickets, there is you at that fair, you and Heather at prom, the second strip from the photo booth. 
“And it’s like, when was it decided that we had to pick our whole future at eighteen, anyway?” May asks, eyebrows twitching like she wants to furrow them. She fights through it, keeping them high on her forehead to let you smooth powder over her lids. “Here I am, barely out of the cradle!” You snort, and her mouth tilts a touch. “Feels like I started walking last week, and now it’s all, what do you mean you don’t have a clue what you want to do with your life? It just feels crazy to me.”
“It is.” You shift forward on the soft shag carpet, your knees bumping hers under the throw keeping your legs warm. 
“Right? I mean, you know that your brain doesn’t even really mature until you’re, like, twenty-five? So I am close enough to a child that I really shouldn’t have this responsibility.”
Humming in agreement, you rub your thumb at the corner of her eye, smudging the edge of the lilac eyeshadow there. 
“At least I have an idea where I’m going. Indiana State, here I come. You’re still applying for NYU, right?”
“Mm. Maybe,”
“Oh, come on, you have to apply at least!” She insists, eyelids twitching. “It’s the place to be, for your poetry, right?”
You hum. “I might still do Chemistry.”
“Chemis- absolutely not!” Her eyes fly open, and you make a noise of protest.
“I’m not done!”
“You are not doing Chemistry.” May says, a comic picture with one eye bordered by soft pastel tones, the other bare of colour, while she looks at you sternly. “You don’t enjoy it!”
“But I could get a job at the end,” you reason. 
May snorts, eyes closing gently, chin peaking out to let you get back into it as though she’s already won the argument. “Job schmob,” she says. “When you’re in New York, you can find a rich man to worry about that.” You frown, and like she senses it, the eye you’re not working on opens again. “Or find a rich man for me. He has to be really rolling in it though, so he can look after us both.”
You hear Eddie’s voice in your ear like he’s in the room with you. Just wait, I’ll look after you. 
“Think you can do that?” May asks. “Keep an eye out for me, when you’re making all your arty, interesting friends in New York?”
You swallow, tuning back into the conversation. “I don’t think really want me to find you a man.”
“Mmph. The way my love life is going, I’ll need whatever help I can get.” She moves a little then, a slight tilt of her head that would be imperceptible to anyone but you, who's seen every degree of emotion on May’s face. You know she’s going to drop something serious before she even opens her mouth. “I saw Liam last week.”
You fight through the temptation to stop blending the eyeshadow on her lids, keeping your tone as even as possible. “Oh?”
“When I was in Indianapolis with the girls?” Those trips with the cheerleaders you avoid desperately. The thought of being stuck in a car with Caroline on the way there and back can make you break out in a cold sweat. “He was at one of the bars. He apologised, said he wanted to maybe go out again.”
“Mm.”
“Oh, don’t.”
“I didn’t say anything-”
“That was your judgy mmmh,” she says, batting your hand away from her face to look at you straight. “Last time I heard it was when I showed you that top I bought last month.”
Despite yourself, you crack at the memory of the flouncy pink thing she’d shown you with an awkward, self-aware smile. You’d been working out how to gently tell her to burn it when she’d figured out the tone of your hum and thrown it off in front of you with a whispered, “what was I thinking?” 
Now, your tilted lips turn down at May’s solemn expression, her eyes shiny. 
You shuffle closer, tucking the blanket around the both of you gently, cocooning your legs in together. “He hurt you, last time. Used you.” 
She chews her lip. “That’s what boys do.”
“May-”
“I know you think what happened with Andy was bad, but you’ll learn, that’s just how they are. They need a little more forgiveness than girls, and some of them are worth it.”
You feel the beginning of the argument she might not be quite past. “Andy didn’t really like me, May. He only wanted-”
“The same thing they all want. The only thing they all want.”
Your heart aches for her. “That’s not true.”
“You think it’s not true right now, but when you hold out on Munson the way you did with Andy, you’ll see that it is.”
You fiddle with your fingers then, wondering if you should tell her. The guilt of not sharing that you’d started seeing Eddie prickles along the back of your neck. Your knee starts to bounce, and May blinks at you, just as attune to the meaning of your expressions. “Well, with Eddie-”
“Please, please, tell me you haven’t fucked Eddie Munson.”
“No. I mean, not yet but,” you begin, fiddling with your skirt. “Like, we’ve done, y’know, other stuff.” You glance at her shocked face, worry rising. “Don’t tell anyone. Please.”
“Why would I tell anyone something that would literally ruin what’s little is left of your reputation? You wouldn’t let Andy do anything but you’ve been seeing the freak for a few weeks and you’re, what, sitting in his dirty van giving him hand jobs?”
“Oh my god, May!”
“What? What am I supposed to think?”
You shake your head, tense your hands in your clothes. “It’s not like that with Eddie.” Your mind is awash with shiny brown eyes, soft pink cheeks, Eddie’s voice tickling your neck. “I don’t worry about anything, with him. It’s fun.”
“It’s fun.”
“It’s like, I thought sex was something a boy would do to me, something I’d have to let him do. With Andy, it was like if he took me on dates, it was what he would get in return,” you say, fiddling with the blanket. “But with Eddie it’s like,” you hum, hating how awkward this all sounds, so unused to talking about sex yourself, so used to hearing it from other, experienced, confident people. “We go on dates together, and talk together. And then with the, y’know, sexual stuff, we’re doing it…together.”
“But not really doing it, right?”
“No. But my point is,” you continue, grabbing her hand, clasping it in both of yours. “I know I don’t really know anything about boys, and I know you’re not Eddie’s biggest fan. But even though it’s not been long, I think he’s proof that, maybe, sometimes, boys aren’t what either of us thought. And if you really like Liam, then maybe he deserves your forgiveness. But I really, really don’t think he does if he hasn’t made you think twice about what all boys want. And maybe if you found somebody like Eddie-” She makes a face, but you ignore it. “I mean, somebody who doesn’t ask you to forgive them all the time. I think that would be better.”
“Well, I can tell you right now, I don’t want an Eddie.” You press your lips together, listen to her sigh. “But you’re also…probably, maybe right about Liam.”
“He doesn’t deserve you, May. I mean, to apologise when you happened to be at the same bar! If he was really sorry, he should have come to see you with flowers and everything. He probably just saw you, all pretty, and realised what a dunce he’d been.”
She smiles a little at the vitriol in your voice, usually so soft and quiet. “I missed you.”
You almost flinch. “I’ve been here.”
“You stopped sitting with me at lunch.” 
“I…” You close your mouth, shrug instead. 
“I know it’s partly my fault. I was angry, so I stopped defending you. But then, I mean, you just gave up.” 
“I just- Some of the cheer girls are so intimidating, I never know what to say to them.”
“But you don’t try.” Your heart is sore, the guilt of knowing you’ve made life a little more difficult for her. “Listen, if you want to date Eddie Munson, I can be okay with that. I am okay with that.” She nods, seemingly trying to convince herself. “But will you just try, a little more, with the cheer girls? You don’t have to defend your relationship all the time, but maybe just try talking to them about something else? You could come on our next trip!” 
Your toes curl at the thought. “I don’t know.” 
“Please? We can’t let a boy come between us.” You wonder what she’d say if she knew how hard Eddie seems to try not to come between you. “I like Heather, even though she abandoned us. And I like the cheer girls. But I love you. You’re my best friend.”
“I love you, May. It won’t change.”
“So you’ll try?”
You chew the inside of your lip, give her a little nod that has her breaking out into a smile. “Okay. Okay, great.”
You try not to think about exactly what you’ve just compromised on while you finish her make up. May sits, silent and smiling while you sweep dark eyeliner across her lids, brush mascara over her long lashes.
“There, all done.” You love this bit. May turns to the floor length mirror beside you and grins at her reflection, her pretty eyes bordered by soft pastels from your new palette. It sends a warmth through you that you’d never admit to. Knowing you’re good at this, that even the cheer girls who think you’re weird admire the way you’ll do their make up at competitions. “It’s cool, right?”
“I love it,” she breathes, shifting closer to the mirror enough that the warm throw pulls from the tops of your legs, leaving your thighs chilly. “Just one last question. You’re not gonna play that Satanist game, right?”
Your brain short circuits, having thought you’d just agreed that you wouldn’t have to explain yourself. “Um, It’s really not what you think.” 
The scene plays out in your mind. Eddie, his lips on yours, your hands tangled in his hair, letting you tilt your hips to rub yourself over his thigh, suddenly pulled away from you with a gasp. He’d thrown himself from the bed dramatically, holding his open jeans up by the waistband. You’d watched him, breathless and warm, while he scrambled for a pen before writing in his D&D notebook and looking up at you in excitement. “I just thought of a really cool way to lure them into this whole cave thing I’ve been planning. Shit. They’re so fucked.” Before you could consider being offended that that’s what he’d been thinking about while kissing you, your legs were over his shoulders, his lips were smiling at your thigh. 
You can’t help your fond laugh. “Eddie’s such a dork about it. Last week-” You pause at her expression, realising that May probably doesn’t want to hear that story. You clear your throat. “They just pretend to be fantasy characters.” Witches over a cauldron, Princesses sharing a Kingdom. “Like we used to do, sorta.”
“Yeah, when we were kids.”
You have to swallow the lump that brings up to your throat. To hear her dismissal of the time you’ve been daydreaming about since you walked through her front door. “It’s not Satanist.”
“But you’re still not going to play it, right?”
“No,” you say, feeling cold. “I don’t think I’d be very good at it, anyway.”
She watches you for a second, but says nothing before grabbing the eyeshadow palette from the floor beside you. “Let me try, then. Get you all glammed up for making s’mores later.”
You smile with closed lips, let your eyes fall shut. You have to ignore the pang in your heart, the reminder that some things are entirely different from when you were seven. 
❦⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄❦⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄❦⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄❦⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄❦
“You know, I kinda thought there’d be more trembling.” Eddie’s breath tickles your ear as he whispers, again when he blows cool air on your neck just to see you wriggle a little while you look up at him, wide eyed. His pale face is illuminated only by the screen at the front of the room, but you can still see the mischief in his eyes, in the barely there turn of his smile. “I was told that taking a pretty girl to a scary movie would have you grabbing my thigh in pure terror. That you’d need me to comfort you with my masculinity.” 
You just about fight off the laugh, still glad that you are sequestered together in the back row when a soft amused noise escapes your throat. On screen, the newly transformed and aptly named Evil Ed laughs maniacally. The special effects and practical make up are impressive, but the whole thing has enough of a teen movie vibe that you’ve been about as scared as you were watching Kevin Bacon stuck on a tractor yesterday. 
“You and your masculinity should have picked a scarier movie.” You feel the flutter of nerves that accompanies teasing Eddie back, still always a little worried that it will come out wrong. The answer of Eddie stifling his laughter, eyes crinkling at the sides, has the butterflies scattering. 
“Noted,” Eddie whispers, cheeks dimpled. It strikes you how close he is now, his breath spreading over your cheeks. He leans down more, his nose at your temple, his lips pressing soft to the skin beside your eye. You shut both, breath shaking as Eddie’s mouth leaves a handful of kisses down your cheek to the corner of your mouth. There, he feels you twitch, and his eyes open to find you tense in your seat, fingers curled in your sleeves. 
You are fighting the urge to turn and check the rest of the row, the whole room, to make sure nobody is watching. The image of an attendant appearing with a flashlight taunts you, the thought of being escorted out of the theatre in shame. You open your mouth, trying to work out what to say, but Eddie just smiles at you. His hand finds yours, fingers tangling together in a gentle squeeze. 
“Sorry,” he whispers, licking his lips quickly. “M’sorry, baby.” 
You watch him lean back in his seat, face set in contentment to be sitting with you and feeling your palm against his. You’d been worried for a second there, that he might be angry with you, or that you might have to explain your worries until he understood. But it’s Eddie. 
You stare at his profile, the soft curls the brush his face, his pouty lips, and find you really, really want to kiss him, here and now. Eddie’s your boyfriend, you remind yourself with a shiver of happiness. Teenage girls have been kissing their boyfriends in the backs of movie theatres since the projector was invented, so why, why, shouldn’t you kiss yours?
You rub at the sleeve of your cardigan with your free hand, letting yourself have the comfort of looking around you quickly to make sure there really isn’t anyone else in this row, or even the one in front. With your eyes closed tight, you remind yourself that the boy who ripped your tickets looked about fifteen, not quite dedicated enough to this job to search the rows looking for kissing teenagers with an invasive flashlight. 
Pressing your knees together, you cuddle into Eddie’s side, smell his two-in-one shampoo and his aftershave and his skin. You press a kiss to his cheek, feel a little scratch of early stubble against your lips. His head turns, eyes scanning over your face. “We don’t have to, sweet thing.”
“I know.” You nod, tilting your chin up in petition. “Please?”
Eddie watches you for a second, giving you time to back out before he leans down to press his lips to yours. It’s a chaste thing; so quick that he has your mouth following him when he pulls away to make sure you’re still happy to kiss him here. Eddie breathes a soft laugh that has your stomach twisting, then his hand is covering your cheek. You feel his breath, your eyes close, and he’s kissing you. 
Eddie’s mouth is warm, but it tastes like blue raspberry slushy; sweet and sharp. At the first lick of his tongue against your lips, you feel a soft noise wanting to escape your throat, but it’s beaten back swiftly by the remaining fear that has your heart racing even as Eddie’s thumb smooths a gentle caress over your cheek. Underneath that is a new giddiness. The feeling that you’ve pushed past something, overcome a fear, however small. And to be doing this, making out with your boyfriend at the back of a movie theatre, like other girls have done.
Your arms find his shoulders, hands clasped together behind him, and Eddie smiles to your lips, just barely pulls away. His thumb stretches to rub your swollen bottom lip. “My brave girl.”
You shiver when he kisses you again, your toes curling in your sneakers. You think you could live on Eddie’s praise. Every pretty girl, smart girl, good girl he gives feels like it’s designed to leave you wanting to crawl onto his thighs, or else sit between them. Eddie’s mouth, intent on yours, wet enough that it feels like the start of something he definitely won’t finish in the back row of screen three, has you remembering how free he can be with his praise when your mouth is on him.
You weren’t expecting to like it so much, but thinking about the weight and taste of him in your mouth makes you squirm as much as the thought of his own tongue where you are most sensitive. You’ve enjoyed it every time since the first moment you spent looking up at him from between his thighs. Watching Eddie fight to keep his eyes on you, mess his own hair up when he forces himself not to take yours in his fist and push you down. His voice, desperate and breathy, coaxing you to try and take him just a little deeper, sweet thing. The quick hot flash of degradation when he taps his cock against your cheek or your tongue before pressing inside.
There is even something pleasant about the lasting ache in your jaw afterwards. The feeling that you’re willing and wanting to do something that hurts to make Eddie feel good is a sick satisfaction you're not yet used to.  
Cinema speakers fill the room with a swelling, dramatic soundtrack. A girl screams, a monster cries out in pain, no doubt making everyone else in the room jump in terror and shake with anticipation for how the whole thing will end. You can hear it, but only just, so firmly in the world of Eddie-Eddie-Eddie. 
Eddie has the beats of the movie memorised already, pulling away from you with a soft gasp just as the opening notes of the music over the end credits begin, a little line of spit connecting your lips until Eddie makes one last move to lick it away. 
The lights come up seconds later, the first groups of people standing to leave. They walk past you and Eddie, both breathless and dishevelled, without a second glance. Under the new lighting, Eddie’s cheeks are now clearly pink. It warms you from the inside out to know that you did that.
You feel the need to be close to Eddie as you leave, grasping onto his hand with both of yours when your jackets are on and he’s guiding you from the theatre. “How’d you like the movie?” He asks in the parking lot, dimples deep in his cheeks.
You hide your face in his arm, feeling that strange new embarrassment crawling up your spine. You mumble into the leather of his sleeve. “I hope nobody asks me how it ends.”
“Yeah, hadn’t thought about that.” Eddie opens the door to his van, holding your hand to help you up until you’re settled in the front seat. He leans in through the door with wide eyes. “Hey, maybe we could see it again next weekend?” 
You chew the inside of your lip. “Would I really see the end if we did?” 
His head falls forward, hair following in a wave. When his head tilts back up, one of his eyes is closed. “You figured me out that easy, huh?”
You smile at each other, Eddie looking over your face as you look over his. His big eyes, dark eyelashes, light freckles, sweet nose, plush pink lips. You’ve never seen another boy you could so comfortably describe as pretty.
You think he might walk round to his side, but instead you feel Eddie’s palm, warm at your knee. “So, uh, the thing is,” he rubs a circle with his thumb at the bottom of your thigh. “It’s Wayne’s day off, and most likely if we go to my place he’ll be in the living room watching MacGyver.”
“Oh.”
You feel guilty for being disappointed. Wayne is always polite, never breathes a word of complaint at the fact you seem to be in his home most days. The only inkling of irritation you get is never at you or Eddie. Instead, there is something in the way he drags himself from the trailer every evening, ready to stay up all night at the factory. When you’d asked where he slept, realising that the only bedroom in the trailer was the one decked out with posters and amps, Eddie had shown you the fold out bed in the living room with a close lipped smile. 
He is, more than anyone, due a day off. But you were gearing yourself up for being in Eddie’s bed tonight, trying to prepare the least awkward way of asking him. 
“And I’m happy to just hang out with you, sweet thing, you know that.” His hand squeezes, even the metal of his rings warm from his skin. “So we can go back to mine and watch MacGyver with the old man, or I could try to teach you some guitar again?” 
That’s tempting, certainly. You doubt sitting between Eddie’s legs with his arms around you, guiding your hands over his acoustic guitar was the most effective teaching method, but you certainly preferred it to any alternative. 
“But if you wanted,” Eddie continues. “Only if you wanted, I could maybe drive us to the quarry or something?” Eddie blinks, tucks some of his hair behind his ear with his free hand. “It’s, uh, quiet.”
Your heart beats a little faster, you can hear the sudden rush of it in your ears. “Okay.”
“Okay?” He asks, in that sweet way of his, wanting to make sure you’re not just acquiescing to everything he suggests. 
“Sounds good, I mean.”
“Okay,” he nods. “Belt on, sweet thing.” He gives your knee one last squeeze while you pull the belt over your front, then pushes away from the frame of the door. He taps a quick rhythm under the window when it’s closed, grins at you through the glass. You watch him jog round to the other side, hair flying out behind him, and wonder if every single thing he does will make you want him more. 
You sit in companionable silence while Eddie drives, feeling that soft comfort you only get with a few people, knowing that he’s not waiting for you to speak. You look out the window, watch the shops and gas stations disperse into houses which in turn give way to trees. All of them appear more as streaks of colour than clear pictures with the way Eddie drives, like he’s being judged on time. 
“Hey, can I play you something?” 
You turn from the window, taking a second to fully register the question before you hum a positive noise. Eddie’s right hand reaches out to turn on the stereo, the sudden attack to your ears of wailing guitar making you jump until he turns it down all the way with a sheepish smile, a murmured, “sorry.”
You watch Eddie’s hand, pale and lithe, as he skips through tracks. The metal chain that adorns his wrist is twisted a little at the leather clasp, and you reach to straighten it out with your thumb and first finger. When he’s found the right track, he turns it back up a touch, wiggles his fingers until you grab his hand. An urgent rhythm fills the van, the tell-tale guitars of all Eddie’s music, and he sighs, leaning back into his seat with a grin. 
“Hear the rime of the ancient mariner, see his eye as he stops one of three, mesmerises one of the wedding guests. Stay here and listen to the nightmares of the sea.”
Something clicks.
“Oh, that’s a Coleridge poem!” You lean forward to turn it up further with your free hand, trying to concentrate on the words. It tells the whole story from the lyrical poem you’ve had a copy of since you took an interest in the romantics when you were fifteen; a mariner who kills an albatross and is blamed for the resulting misfortune by everyone on his ship. 
“I knew you’d know it. My smart girl.” Eddie is the picture of pride, eyes crinkled at the sides. “I was reading a Steve Harris interview - he, uh, writes most of Iron Maiden’s songs? And he mentioned the reference and I just thought, you know, you might think it was cool.”
“I do.” You picture Eddie, soft and comfy in his bed, flicking through a magazine. You imagine him reading about his favourite thing, and a spark lighting in his head relating to you. Something that made him excited to share it with you. “Thank you, Eddie.”
He shrugs, like it doesn’t mean anything, but his cheeks are blooming with pink. You can’t say anything else, for fear of blurting out every thought running through your head. 
You listen in silence, trying to decide how you want to ask him. Every way to say it feels awkward and wrong. Fuck me, take me, have sex with me. You picture asking Eddie to make love and feel a mix of yearning and nausea. By the time you reach the quarry, you have been playing with the ring on Eddie’s right hand, feeling the smooth stone, twisting it round his finger, for a good five minutes.
Eddie steals his hand from you while he parks by the trees opposite the quarry, pulling the keys from the ignition and throwing them on the dashboard before reaching out to let you take hold of his hand again. The easy quiet is gone. You can feel him waiting for you to speak. Your mind screams at you to remain silent, hating the thought that you might risk humiliation with Eddie. 
“Will you look at me, baby?” Eddie pulls your hands from between you. You follow it with your gaze, watch him press a kiss to your knuckles before you meet his eyes. "I really didn't mean to, you know, imply anything by bringing you here."
You shake your head emphatically. “I know. You’d never.”
Eddie breathes a little sigh from his nose, looking relieved. You think he has to be the sweetest boy ever born, and then you can’t help yourself. Eddie makes a soft happy noise when you bring your face to his, lets you kiss his soft bottom lip. He licks softly at yours, so you open your mouth to let him in, holding back a whine and reaching up to play with the collar of his denim vest; the material rough and familiar in your fingers. 
Eddie pulls from you, licks his lips, and breathes, "I can't get enough of that." 
"Mm?"
"The way you grab at me when you get a little shy."
Your eyes widen, processing the reminder that your silly little habits are not as inconspicuous as you might wish to believe. Of course Eddie has noticed the way you fiddle with his hands, his rings, his hair, his clothes, the second you feel an uptick in the pace of your heart. But then, Eddie just said he likes it. 
"S'not annoying?" 
“Not for me! They call me Eddie the stress toy, you know. People used to come for miles around to give me a squeeze."
You laugh at his attempt at an earnest face. "Used to?" 
"Yeah, well, you got exclusive rights, these days." Eddie says, tilting his head with a touch of endearing shyness. “What kinda idiot would I have to be, not to like my girl touching me all over?”
You want him, want him, want him.
You press your heated face to his shoulder, still playing with the frayed denim of his collar while you mumble into the vest. “Eddie?” You feel the vibration of his answering hum against your cheek. “I want-” You shake your head, as if you could bury yourself into his clothes. “Can we-” You turn your face, looking at the seat behind, all the space there. 
Eddie strokes at your waist. “You wanna, uh, get in the back?”
At your quick nod, Eddie clasps your cheek with his warm hand. He tilts your head, kisses you soundly. “Stay right there.” 
Eddie jumps from the van, legs swinging, and jogs round to your side to open the door for you. “Princess,” he says, offering you his hand with a flourish. You giggle, jumping down towards him and letting him lead you round to the back of his van like a gentleman. Still keeping up the routine, he opens the back door and gestures with a bow before helping you up. 
The back is a scene of amps and wires, a bass drum with CORRODED COFFIN scrawled over the skin. Luckily there is space enough for the two of you, so you settle yourself in the middle, surrounded by enough little pieces of Eddie that the back of this van feels a little like home. When you look up, Eddie’s still outside, staring in at you.  
You press your knees together, turn them to the side. “Eddie?”
“Yeah-” his voice breaks. He tries to hide it with a cough, clearing his throat and giving his chest a couple taps with the side of his fist. “Yeah,” he repeats, deeper now, as he climbs up after you. When the doors are closed, Eddie shuffles towards you, half squatting. “So, you’re happy with the carriage, Princess?” You nod, throat tight when Eddie kneels down in front of you. “That’s good.” Something in his face changes, a spark of excitement in his dark eyes. “You wanna lay back for me?” 
The space between your legs pulses. “Mm.”
“Here,” he says, pulling off his jacket and rolling it up into a makeshift pillow. You lean back and he leans in to place it below your head, face above yours while you settle into the soft leather. His hair tickles your cheeks until he tucks it back, staring down at you. Your heart, your body, screams at you, ask him, ask him, ask him. Eddie kisses your neck quickly, shakes his head like he’s emptying out a thought. “Fuck, I can’t tell you how many times I’ve had this dream.”
Again, ask him, ask him, ask him.
“Eddie,” you start, mind caught between the worry of how this will go and giving in to the gentle fuzziness of Eddie’s hands rubbing gently at your waist. You swallow, look to his eyes, then his forehead. “Will you-” The words catch, leaving you with a warm face and eyes squeezed closed in embarrassment. 
Eddie hums, gifts your cheeks his lips. His nose brushes the side of your face, and he murmurs. “Anything you want, pretty. Let me hear it, mm? ”
It’s Eddie, you tell yourself. From the first time you spoke to him, he’s never judged you for anything. He won’t judge you now. It’s Eddie, you repeat in your head. My Eddie. 
“I’ve never, um-” Your toes curl at the clear nerves in your voice, the beating of your heart that you swear he must be able to hear. “Nobody’s ever- Mmh.” 
“It’s just me,” Eddie says, thumb at your cheek. “It’s only me, sweet girl. Wanna know what you’re thinking.”
“I think,” you sigh, let some of the nerves out with it. “I think you’re beautiful, Eddie.” He blinks, surprised, but gives you a sweet smile when you touch gently at his pink cheek, feel the beginning of bristle under your finger. “And I want you. I mean, I want you to be first.” And second, and third, and every time after.
You stare at each other, breath heavy in your chest. Eddie’s eyes shine until he blinks it away. “Come- come here,” Even though he says it, he’s the one to lean down to you, giving you a chaste kiss that turns desperate when you reach up to play with his curls. 
Your head swims, relief and anticipation swirling together. A quiet moan escapes you when Eddie’s mouth moves to your jaw, down your neck. “Do you, um, have, like, protection?”
Eddie freezes. His face comes into view, brows furrowed. “Wait. You want me to fuck you right now?”
Oh. You hear the rush of blood in your ears, a ringing noise. You pull your hands from his hair, fingers curling, hands tucked to your chest. You suddenly wish he wasn’t on top of you, wish you could hide your face from him. Your head starts working overtime, supplying all the things he’s no doubt thinking about you now. You think of Erin, writing on the bathroom wall. Slut. Desperate. Whore.
“Hey,” he says, voice soft. Eddie presses his pointer finger to your temple, gives it a playful rub. “Are you doing that thing you said you do? Lying there convincing yourself you’ve fucked something up?”
A little part of you resents that he nailed it down so quickly, but you nod, blinking away the first bubbling tears, staring at the collar of his Metallica shirt rather than his face. “I just thought you’d want to.”
Eddie makes a soft noise at the back of his throat. “C’mere.” He pushes himself up from the floor of the van, grabs your hand to pull you with him. You end up curled at his side, knees just resting on the side of his thigh, his arm tucked around your shoulder as he leans you both against the back of the seats. You pull your sleeves over your hands, fidgety even as Eddie is rubbing at your shoulder softly. 
“Course I want to,” he says, leaning into you. “I wanted you on that picnic table. I want you all the time.”
That soothes you a little, enough that your right hand peeks out from your sleeve to play with the hem of his shirt. But your sensitive heart still throbs, tentative and sore. “So, why…?”
“I- Shit. Give me a minute.” Eddie hugs you tight for a second, then shuffles across the floor of the van, practically launching himself out of the back doors with a practised ease that makes you smile despite yourself. You can’t see him from here, but you hear him outside, the passenger door opening and closing behind you. When he returns, he’s got that metal lunch box he carries around with him. A different kind of confusion blooms when he sits next to you and opens it, rummaging through the little plastic bags of illicit substances. He pulls out a wad of rolled bills, a little chunkier than when you’d bought weed from him in the woods that first day.
“Wanna know what this is for?” Eddie asks, looking unusually serious when you glance at him. He opens his mouth then closes it again, eyes fixing on where he is thumbing at the band holding the bills together. “I thought you might ask me, eventually. Hoped you would, at least.” He breathes a laugh, pings the elastic. “So I’ve been saving up, you know?”
“Saving up?”
Eddie nods, turns his wide gaze to you with a tilted head. “Wanted to take you somewhere nice. Buy you dinner, something other than a burger or a pizza slice. Get a room at a hotel, with a big comfy bed. Thought I could show you-” He twitches, eyes flickering away from your face and back again. He swallows, shrugs. “S’like I said. I wanna deserve you.”
Your tense shoulders slump. Your chest aches. “Eddie,” you whisper, shaking your head. Trying again to blink away tears, you grab the roll of dollars from him, throw it back into that dumb obvious lunchbox. You climb up into his lap and wrap your arms around his shoulders. Your wet eyes meet his. “You don’t have to prove anything. You deserve-” Me, whatever you want, everything. Your fingers twitch. You close your eyes tight, ashamed you can’t look at him when you say it. “I think, all the time, about how much I wish I knew you earlier. It’s like, before, I just spent the whole time missing you.” You find it in you to look at him then, gaze at his pretty face; pink, lightly freckled, shiny under his eyes. “I want you, Eddie. I want to be with you wherever you are.”
You stare at each other, listening to the steady rhythm of your breaths until they move in sequence, chests expanding and contracting together. You get that same feeling you got when Eddie held your hand after touching you for the first time, how he listened when you told him about how you blow out of proportion in your head, the way he was angry for you when you recounted how Andy treated you. When Eddie told you that he couldn’t understand you liking him, that people have held him at arm's length for being too much, that he refuses to give up on school, believes wholeheartedly in his dreams. One moment at a time, you are peeling back layers, exposing soft tissue. You are offering each other all your hidden parts, whispering, please look after this with every squeezed hand and kissed cheek. 
Eddie sniffs, wipes his eyes. Seeing his shaky smile, hearing his wet laugh, is better than any soft bed in any hotel.
“That’s good, cause, uh, I really hadn’t saved that much.” You giggle together through lumped throats. “At the rate I was going, you were gonna be waiting till you were forty-five.” You shake your head at him fondly, reaching up to play with the feathers of hair that brush the side of his face. Eddie pulls you in closer, ducks his chin. “But I still can’t take your virginity in the back of my van, sweet thing,” he says. “It just wouldn’t be right. You should be in a bed, at least. And if you’re happy for it to be mine? I’ll just make sure my sheets are washed.”
You rub the soft ends of his hair between your fingers. “That sounds nice.”
“Yeah?” His hand comes to your cheek, helping you look at him. He must be able to feel the warmth of your face in his hand, but you lean into his palm anyway. When Eddie kisses you, it’s a gentle thing, a promise. 
When his tongue peeks out to lick into your mouth, it’s a request you’re happy to fulfil. Eddie groans at the taste of you, the sound of it registering across your whole body. Your hips roll subtly, and you feel the quirk of his lips. 
Eddie sighs into your mouth. “My pretty girl wants me to fuck her in my bed, mm?” 
The increasingly familiar zing of pleasurable shame zips up your spine. The air around you shifts, crackling like the split second of awareness before an electric shock. “Yeah, Eddie.” 
“But you need to be touched right now. So desperate,” he murmurs, the word that had mocked you minutes ago, now a warm tease. “So desperate you wanted to take my cock for the first time right here. In my van, parked by the side of the road.”
You shake your head, because you’re not really at the side of the road. Eddie was right when he said it’s quiet; nobody comes here. You’re about as likely to be found by the quarry as you are in his room. Eddie’s eyes light up with dark amusement, his hand drifting to the back of your neck. The pressure of his fingers there makes your hips twitch, your body recognising the signs, the promise of what’s to come when Eddie’s palm starts holding your head up. 
“No?” He asks, tilting his head, a teasing pout finding his pink lips. “You sayin’ I didn’t hear your right?”
Your toes curl. “No.”
The lines that run from the sides of Eddie’s nose to the corners of his lips deepen. “No, I did hear you right?”
“Eddie,”
“Ahh, yeah,” he breathes, wrapping an arm around your waist to help you lie back. He reaches out for his jacket, still rolled up on the floor, and places it back under your head. “That’s the good stuff.” You open your legs for him, let him settle his body on top of you, feeling the hardening length of him through denim and cotton at the apex of your thighs. Eddie licks his lips, tucks his hair back with a breathy laugh. “Shit. You got me thinking about it, now.”
Eddie sinks his face to your neck, the warm sting of his tongue making the mess between your legs increasingly hard to ignore. His big hand pulls at the hem of your skirt, lifting it up to your tummy. He glances down your body, eyes closing tight at the pale blue cotton cupping your mound, dark and sticky where it’s soaked up your wetness. “Wanna feel your little pussy on my cock so fucking bad. I can’t tell you how-” He cuts off a groan at the first run of his fingers over the wet material. “Christ. How many times I’ve thought about it.” 
You blink at him slowly, mind drifting into the calm of knowing Eddie’s going to make sure you both feel good. Your hips tilt naturally, helping him rub the curve of his finger over your clit through soaked cotton, then wiggling to help him more when his fingers hook into the elastic to pull them down your legs. Once they’re past your sneakers, he holds them in his hand for a second, rubbing his thumb along their centre. When you tilt your hips, pussy barely catching the rough denim over his crotch, his nostrils flare. “Don’t distract me, I’m holding precious cargo.”
He seems to settle on where to put them, draping the cotton over the top of one of the amps rather than letting them touch the floor. You giggle at his careful consideration, and Eddie’s dimples press into flushed cheeks. 
“You thought about it?” Eddie asks, watching your face when his thumb sweeps over your clit, noting the sensitivity before he starts up with tight circles that have you keening. “Thought about me inside you?”
He has to feel the new wetness between your legs that comes with your desperate nod. In truth, you’ve thought about it almost endlessly. You know it can hurt, have heard enough stories of virginity loss from the girls at the cheer table to know that it probably will. But when you imagine being close to Eddie that way, the only thing you can conjure up is the feeling of his fingers inside, how much further you’d have to stretch to take Eddie’s cock, the one that makes your jaw ache. Maybe the prospect should give you pause, but thinking about how Eddie would guide you through it sends excited shivers down your spine.
“Yes, Eddie.”
“You wanna feel my cock now?” He breathes, watching confusion flicker over your blissed face. “Know you like riding your pillow, sweet thing,” he says, your face hot at the memory of telling him how you masturbate. “But I think you might like rubbing up on me a little better.” 
Your clit twitches. You clench inside. Eddie either feels or sees the reaction of your body because he’s humming in excitement the next second, leaning down to kiss you, press his tongue to yours until you’re groaning into his mouth. He looks a little manic when he pulls away, hands scrambling with his belt when he throws himself to the side, lying on his back, ready for you to climb up on him. 
Without thinking, your hands catch his, stopping him from pulling at the loop. You squeeze his palms. “Let me?”
In answer, he moves his hands from his jeans, letting them rest flat across his stomach. You bite your lip, fighting the urge to sit on his thigh and grind against the denim just to get some instant relief. You reach out to the side of his head, grab his jacket and slide it to the back of his head. Eddie tilts his head up, lets you position it just so. You check, “comfy?” and he nods. 
Satisfied, you return to Eddie’s belt. The action of pulling at the leather is excitingly familiar to you now. The button of his jeans comes next, then his zip humming as you pull it down. His boxers are a soft check, the waistband positioned just under the first tufts of dark hair that lead to where Eddie is filling out the material. You think about his hands teasing your clit through your panties, mimicking him by brushing a knuckle over the mound peeking out from his zipper. It’s enough to make Eddie’s eyes squeeze shut, his fingers twitch. 
You hook your fingers into the elastic, start pulling them down. Eddie sighs in relief when his cock meets the air, hard enough to rise from his underwear the second he’s free. You imagine the stretch of him again, and clench down on emptiness. Eddie’s cock is a pretty pink all over. The furled skin at the top is a little shiny, and you know if you grasped his cock and pulled that skin back, his head would be wet with excitement. 
The thought strikes to just lean down and take him in your mouth, surprised to find that that’s already something of a comfort zone for you. But your clit throbs like it’s protesting, so you shuffle on your knees, feeling the sticky spread of your cunt when you open your legs to bracket his hips. You reach down, let yourself stroke Eddie’s cock just to hear the soft noise it draws out from his throat. You rub your thumb over that sensitive spot below his head, press his cock down until his length rests over the hair above it and the bottom of his soft tummy. 
With your free hand, you drift your hand between your legs, letting your fingers drift over your clit. You make a V with your fingers at the top, splitting your cunt open for him and feel a bone deep certainty that Eddie is the only person who could watch you doing this without real shame casting its shadow. 
“C’mon,” Eddie says, getting impatient. “Sit on it, use my cock how you want, just let me feel you.” 
Nodding, body instinctively wanting to follow his direction, you settle yourself on his cock. Eddie groans at the warm slick that surrounds him, hands immediately moving to your hips to help guide you. Your entrance flexes at the base of him, and he tries to pull you straight down like he could find more space between your lips for his girth. “Jesus Chri-”
Eddie’s words cut off with a choke when you glide yourself forward, hearing your wetness spread along his dick. You whine at the feeling, Eddie’s cock stimulating not just your twitchy button but your soft, clenching hole. Shifting back, your legs twitch when his head, exposed as the surrounding skin is pulled back by the clasp of your lips, catches just right against your clit. A few more blissful drags, and you are whining, hands flat against Eddie’s chest, fingers pulling at the softness of his shirt. 
You wiggle your hips, close to hysteria at how good it feels to have Eddie this close. Eddie grins up at you, the pride on his face making you all the more desperate. He looks overwhelmingly pretty like this, hair fanned out across his jacket, lips wet and swollen from his constant licking and your own kisses. His neck, as blushed as his face and his cock, is exposed and tense. His dark eyelashes that flutter every time his head drags over your clit and emerges from between your lips. His eyes, dark in the centre where his pupils have swallowed up mahogany, flicker back and forth between your face and where his cock vanishes and appears again, enveloped and released by the wet split of your pussy.
“You feel me now, mm?” He says, sounding hurried like he’s trying to get it out before his voice is swallowed up by groans. “Haven’t even taken three of my fingers, but you thought you could just lie back and take my cock?” You bounce a little when his head flicks your clit this time, torturing the swollen button with him a little longer. “Couldn’t’ve done it right, not how my desperate girl needs it. Just wanna make you feel good, you know?” 
“Feels good,” you murmur, wiggling your hips to feel his cock flex and shift over all the tender skin where you are most sensitive. “You always feel so good, Eddie.”
“Yeah? That’s it, that’s it.” Eddie’s fingers dig into your hips, no doubt leaving you with marks that will be satisfyingly tender by morning. “Fuck. Fuck, baby, I love you-r pretty voice.” He swallows, eyes now fixed on your pleasured face. “Love when you talk to me.” 
“Eddie, m’gonna-” You start to shake, and his hands grab at your hips, helping you keep moving along him even as the stimulation edges towards painful. 
“That’s it, cum on me. Let me feel it.”
Your body spasms, letting yourself move only with Eddie’s pushing and pulling as the throb of your clit spreads through your body, sends tingles up your spine. You feel your clit numb for a second, know enough now about your own body what that means for the intensity of your orgasm. You sit on that precipice, gasping in air. 
Pleasure bursts, has you shaking and moaning and, unbeknownst to you, repeating, “Eddie, Eddie, Eddie,” while the boy beneath you chases his own high, wanting to finish before you’re too oversensitive to keep your perfect warm pussy on him. 
Bending his knees, he grinds up into you, helping you slide along him. When he pulls your hips just so, and the tip of him barely catches the soft entrance of your cunt, Eddie finally cries out beneath you. The almost violent twitch of his cock between your legs makes you squirm, picturing that happening inside you. Eddie’s cum, thick and white, lands across his stomach in droplets, the last rope clinging to the tip of his cock in a way that, shamefully, makes your mouth water.
Sensitive, twitching, you rise from his body. Your shaking thighs fail you almost immediately, and you fall back on your butt between his open legs, a hand coming to cover your stimulated pussy like it needs protection. Eddie sits up, wipes his own hand across his stomach and draws his cum into his mouth with an ease that might surprise you if you hadn’t seen Eddie casually taste his own cum just about every time he’s orgasmed in front of you. 
This is what you meant, when you told May that being with Eddie is fun. Sex has always been something with disclaimers attached. Something to be enjoyed, but not too much. Something to get lost in, but not enough that you cross the line into acting slutty. It seemed to you like a tightrope nobody had shown you how to walk. 
And then there’s Eddie, who just watched you cum so hard on top of him that you immediately fell on your ass, and he’s grinning at you like he’s never been so proud of anyone in his life. “Now tell me that wasn’t way better than your pillow.” He reaches out for you, and you let him pull you into his arms, rest your head against his chest. You watch, warm in your face, while he tucks his softening cock, still covered in you, back into his boxers. “You feel okay?”
“Yeah,” you nod, tracing the blue lines of lightning on his shirt with your finger. Your thighs twitch again, and you laugh together, soft and breathless. You settle into that post high afterglow, letting yourself be comforted by how surrounded by Eddie you are. His arm around you, his chest under your head. You can hear the way his heartbeat shifts from an intense rhythm to a steady beat under your ear. There’s another sudden uptick just before he speaks.
“I was missing you, too.”
You shift, look up at him from his chest, find him staring at the ceiling. 
“Sometimes my life has felt like being dealt one bad hand after another.” His gaze shifts then, eyes finding yours. “Now, I think, maybe I was saving up for something really good without realising.” 
Eddie Munson; town freak, rumoured Satanist, bad news for sweet girls like you, on the floor of his van, arms wrapped tight around you, says; “You’re a lifetime of good luck, sweetheart.”
And then you know. 
Next Part
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triplehmunson · 6 months
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𝔓𝔒𝔙: Enemies to lovers with Stefan Salvatore (fem! Reader) ‼️warning⚠️: little smut! Mention of erotic things, cute very cute! there is no age difference, You're of age! Stefan is a cute and a little bit perv future boyfriend! Fem! Reader 🥰✨🫢 enemies to lovers!
You:
You meet Stefan thanks Elena when you went to see her on the way out of the university.
You don't like Stefan at all, you feel like he's the typical Fuck boy that exists anywhere.
When you went to a game to see Elena and Caroline who were the cheerleaders of the team where Stefan was the captain, by "accident" Stefan hit you with the ball and instead of apologizing he laughed with his friends and made you look ridiculous.
Since that horrible day you hate him with all your being and even wish that something bad would happen to him, you know, Karma!
One night when you left the house to go shopping you discovered that Stefan was a vampire, you were shocked because you didn't believe they still existed.
You had a problem, is that you You hated vampires since they killed the love of your life, you swore that the night you were going to transform into a wolf you were going to kill those who took your boyfriend's life.
You had some strange dreams where Stefan was on top of you, he was biting you but you didn't scream for help, rather you moaned his name and asked for more, that made you wake up panting and sweating.
Every time you went to see Elena to help her with her relationship with Damon, who was your best friend, you always saw her with that "cocky idiot" as you had nicknamed Stefan.
When you tried to talk to her, he always interrupted you saying: "Come on, baby, you can't wait your turn to talk to Elena, oh I know! You're going to tell her that you touch yourself thinking about me" and you turn red from shame and anger… How dare he say something like that!
Unfortunately for you, you found out at a dinner with your friends, which included Damon, Elena, Caroline and her boyfriend Klaus Mikaelson, because Stefan, that "big idiot" was Damon's brother, your jaw literally fell when you saw that the boy who most you hated was the brother of one of your best friends, this couldn't be real!
Who knew that the hatred you felt for Stefan was slowly turning into love, since whenever you saw him with other girls you would get extremely jealous.
Every time Stefan bothered you or looked at you, the colors rose to your face, at first you didn't know why but you loved having his attention, it made you feel special.
Although you didn't admit it in front of him or your friends, you loved it when he called you names like: "baby" "princess" "annoying little thing" "sexy immature" "sweetie" "doll"
Y/n: Since I hate Stefan I want to hit him but at the same time I want to sleep in his arms while his pretty eyes look at me and his pretty lips kiss me.
You love his back madly since it is wide, it looks soft and how you want to scratch him when it becomes possible for him to make you his.
Stefan:
Stefan already knew you for a long time thanks to his brother.
You always caught his attention especially since you were short in his eyes, you were a cutie.
"He said or pretended" to hate you so as not to attract the attention of others and be described as weak, especially his friends, you know, he has to preserve his "popularity".
He loved when you got angry because you made a pout that made him want to eat you with kisses.
He once heard a rumor that you were in a relationship with Elijah Mikaelson, that made him extremely jealous, his nature as the "ripper" came to light every time he thought about you with another man other than him.
Despite his "angelic face" Stefan was very possessive of his "angel" that is, you.
His jealousy was not so extreme or possessive to the extreme, nor did he want to see himself as a monster, he wanted to be your protector, your safe place, the love of your life.
He did know that you were a wolf thanks to a conversation he had with Klaus since he knew the "boss" of your pack.
He was not ashamed to admit that he had erotic dreams about you, whenever he woke up sweating and panting he wished you were there to help him with his "problems."
One day at the gym where you went with Caroline (Stefan also goes to that gym) he saw that you were going to do yoga and when he saw you in those yoga pants he got hard and horny and he held on until he could not take you right then and there or take you away. to the bathroom to make you his until you're tired.
He loved madly, your laugh was like music to his ears and your smile was like a drug for him, it was very addictive.
He plans to marry you and have a big family by your side.
The only person who can stop the actions of the "ripper" is you, since you are his angel, the love of his life.
Stefan loves your neck madly. In his eyes it looks so soft and flexible. Many times he has fantasized about fitting his fangs and feeding on you while he imagines that you moan his name asking for more.
Stefan: You're going to see my angel, very soon you're going to be mine, you're going to be in my arms and I'm going to kiss you and hug you and I'm never going to let you go... I'm going to protect you with my life if necessary.
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haylijahtilldeath · 7 months
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What are your top 5s in anything TVDU related? (Characters, ships, friendships, familial bonds, episodes, etc.)
Ooh, my first question. Thank you for asking!
Even though I've watched tvd first, but I prefer the originals to it. So, my answer is going to be mostly about them.
I'm going to do the characters separately.
First, characters from T.O
Elijah Mikaelson (because he was the calm before the storm, I don't know how to describe him, he was just so resilient and holding onto his brother when the entire world could only see a monster in him, and for all his complex layers.) and Hayley Marshall (because she was a BAMF, the best mother you could have) fighting for first place, but none of them can win.
Camille O'Connell because she was such a ray of sunshine. (Caroline stans do not come at me, this is about two characters who have literally never met.)
Freya Mikaelson was such a badass.
Klaus Mikaelson because he had the best retorts and sarcasm.
Gia because she was so down to earth about everything. (Putting her after Klaus feels so wrong lmao.)
Now, Tvd characters. I can't conjure any explanation for them.
Caroline Forbes
Enzo St. John
Stefan Salvatore
Rayna Cruz
Rose from S2
Ships.
Haylijah, because have you seen them? The chemistry, the compatibility, the love and all the respect. (S5 never happened.)
Bonenzo because they were so good together, and Enzo actually loved Bonnie and didn't spend his time using her.
Klamille, because Camille could see beyond 'evil Klaus' and understood him like no one else ever did, and Klaus saw so much light in her, and he cared about her.
Steroline because they were also good together.
Gialijah because they had so much chemistry and there was just something about them
Friendships.
Caroline & Enzo, because he stepped up for her and they had something special about them.
Camille & Vincent, because they related to one another after all damage they got because of the Mikaelson family, and they made something good out of it.
Freya & Hayley because they spent years together raising Hope, and they bonded so well.
Stefan and Lexi because they do supportive besties better than anyone.
Bonnie and Damon because they have managed to go from sworn enemies to best friends.
Familial bonds.
Hayley and Hope. No one does mother and daughter better than them.
Elijah and Rebekah. We saw so many times how Elijah cared for her and how she looked up to him. I believe he was her favorite brother, even if the show wanted to make us believe it was Klaus.
Marcel & Davina. They're not family by blood, but the way he was her family more than her real family and tried to protect her meant so much.
Elijah and Hope. We did not get much of them, but they had so much potential. If the show didn't completely destroy Elijah to redeem Klaus, we might have seen him be the best uncle out there.
Freya/ Rebekah and Hope. These aunt/niece relationships were so good. Rebekah cared for her for months, and kept her safe, and Freya raised her with Hayley and taught her so much.
Finding episodes that I genuinely love from beginning to end is difficult.
TO S2E9: The Map of Moments. We had family, we had bickering and we had love.
TVD S3E14: Dangerous Liaisons. We had a ball straight out from a fantasy, do I need to say more?
TO S1E20: A Closer Walk with Thee. It was not a happy episode, but we had our first Haylijah kiss, and it's good enough to be in my top 5.
TO S5E8 : The Kindness of Strangers. As much as I hated S5, but this episode was so good. We saw the Mikaelson family reunited, and every time I watch Elijah break down after remembering Hayley's death, I can't help but cry.
TO S1E1: Always and Forever. This feels like such a basic answer, but I love this episode. It was the beginning of an epic tv show, and it's just so nostalgic.
These are the ones you mentioned, and I can't for the life of me think about anything else to rank. Anyway, I am awkward most of the time, and it includes this answer. So, don't judge me too harshly!
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bellemorte180 · 6 months
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WIP Wednesday
“Congratulations Nik. I am happy for you.” Given the tone, Caroline almost believed Rebekah but Klaus said nothing. Rebekah did not wait for a reply, instead heading towards Elijah’s study. Elijah gave an exhausted sigh and reached to grip Klaus’s shoulder, offering a comforting squeeze before following Rebekah inside. 
The room grew still, the only thing to be heard were the echoes of Caroline’s own thoughts and the soft clicking of Katherine’s heels as she swiftly left them alone together. Alone. There was no need for chaperones or Katherine’s prying eyes. They were married and Caroline found herself standing in a room, alone, with her husband for the first time. They were feet apart, peering at one another and she realized just how much of a stranger her husband was. At least to her he was. 
She questioned just how much of a stranger she was to him. 
The cold glare that Klaus had worn only seconds prior faded away into that look of yearning he had resting upon his face during their wedding breakfast. The room grew hotter and Caroline felt it hard to breathe. Her heartbeat picked up, racing in her chest but she couldn’t look away from him. The silence was deafening, an omen of what their marriage could hold once they found themselves alone in a manor far away in the country. 
But then Klaus took a step forward, placing one foot in front of the other and moved towards her. He was low, cautious almost as though he was approaching a wild animal. She wondered what she must look like to him that would make him so hesitant to come to her. The rumors that flooded around him made little sense with the man who was coming closer to her now. There was a gentleness that would not be possible for a man who murdered his first wife. At least, that is what Caroline thought as he stood directly in front of her. Klaus did not look away from her as his hand reached up to cup her face, his thumb grazing across her cheek bone. He leaned down and pressed his lips against hers, causing Caroline’s eyes to flutter shut. 
This kiss was different from the one they had shared when they took their vows. That one was sweet, gentle and quick but this was anything but. The way Klaus’s lips molded to hers, moving with a passion that made Caroline wonder if she was being devoured. Not carnally but as her body pressed against his, with one hand resting on her hip and the other firmly pressed against her cheek, there was a feeling spreading down deep into her core that she could not name. Her lips parted and his teeth sunk down onto her lip, piercing it. 
Caroline hissed in surprise but the slight pain wasn’t unpleasant. Klaus pulled back, his eyes flickering down to her lips. His thumb ran across them, the blood spreading from the wound and she could taste it on her tongue. There was no apology waiting for her on his lips but Caroline found that she did not want one. 
“Let's take a walk through the rose garden.” Klaus whispered, almost afraid that speaking any louder would draw unwanted attention to them,
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aro-ortega · 1 year
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BUT EVERYBODY SO QUICK TO STAND UP
AND SAY, IT GOTTA BE THIS WAY OR THAT WAY
GOTTA ASK YOURSELF, IS THIS REALLY WHAT I WANTED?
EVERYBODY SO QUICK TO CRY OUT
AND SAY, YOU GOTTA KEEP YOUR SHIT TOGETHER
BUT BABY, WATCH ME FREAK OUT
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andreal831 · 1 year
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No Humanity Analysis
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If you're caught up on The Great War, you know why I am analyzing the No Humanity storylines in TVDU. I think there is a lot of confusion about what 'turning humanity off' means. And I think a lot of the confusion stems from the writers/characters not really knowing what it means.
The characters, when their humanity is off, will often throw around comments about not having emotions, but that's not realistic. If they had no emotions, they wouldn't feel anger or annoyance, which we clearly see from each NH character. Characters who actually experience no emotion would be very calm and logical. We see NH Caroline wanting to party and have fun -- all emotions. NH Stefan gets annoyed, a lot, with everyone wanting to turn it back on. Even NH Damon gets annoyed and vengeful with Lexie in the flashback. NH Elena is petty with Caroline based on emotions. So it is clearly different than turning emotions off.
Rather, to me, it seems more like they lack empathy. They feel the emotions but just don't care how they impact those around them. The show calls it humanity because the way humans can empathize with each other is a core part of humanity. NH characters can act ruthlessly because they do not fear consequences or how their decisions affect those around them. But throughout this, they still want to live their lives and experience emotions -- just without the guilt that comes with humanity.
Now, if you are caught up on TGW, you know I've added something that we are told is not possible in TVD, *spoiler* an Original turns off their humanity *spoiler* We are told by Rose that the older vampires cannot turn off humanity because their humanity is already so blurred. But older vampires still do have humanity, if they didn't, the audience wouldn't root for them. For a big part, they do not care how their actions impact humans, but they definitely care how their actions impact each other. It may be a selfish humanity, but there is still empathy/guilt there. And we even see moments of the Originals showing empathy to people outside of their family. Meaning they still have something to shut down. It may be a less dramatic change than seeing someone as compassionate as Elena or Caroline shut their humanity off, but there would still be a difference.
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dlsintegration · 1 year
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Using @iwtvfanevents's a meal to remember event as an opportunity to celebrate some of the sickos beautiful authors in this fandom 🧡 here's a list of some of my favourite recommendations, all of them Louis-centric and/or involving louis in a major fashion.
I will also be adding a song that I associate to each of them!!
🐺Leslou🐑
canon/semi-canon compliant
Pour (E) by baberainbow / @baberainbowao3: Kicking this list off with one of my all times favorite, manages to capture their voices perfectly. You'll never go wrong with one of babe's fics, they're all canon in my head 🧡
song: holy terrain - fka twigs
Glass (E) by baberainbow / @baberainbowao3: Melting just thinking about this one. I can never be free of them.
Pieta (E) by baberainbow / @baberainbowao3: Gabrielle gives lestat something he needs and gives louis something he didnt know he needed 🧡 Gabrielle is so kind 🧡
song: let go - tinashe
song: mary magdalene - fka twigs
Tides (E) by @nlbv: Tides my best friend. had to stare at my ceiling for at least 10 minutes after that one and it doesn't lose its impact no matter how much I come back to it. Masterful grasp on both louis and lestat's characterization and the toxicity that permeates their relationship.
song: tear you apart - she wants revenge
Roadkill (E) by @baberainbowao3 and @nlbv: TELL THE AVENGERS TO PACK IT THE FUCK UP. This is the most ambitious crossover of our generation. Roadkill my wife my beloved my soulmate. Read it so many times i've managed to convince myself it was canon. and it is. What is a family meant for if not for going to the circus, commiting horrifying acts of violence and making plans for the future 🧡
song: savage good boy - japanese breakfast
someone buy me roses (E) by indigostohelit: Perfect dialogue, impeccably true to their characters, illustrates louis' religious hangups and repression in a subtle funny and intimate way.
song: save a prayer - duran duran
Amour Rouge (E) by revengefrnnk: Louis exploring femininity. Big big fan of putting that man in lingerie personally. 10/10 certified s1 deleted scene to me.
song: blood and butter - caroline polachek
AUs
Reformation (E) by verseau / @greedydemands (MODERN AU): The sacred texts. We all remember where we were. 10/10 will make you go through the full range of existing human emotions. I laughed. I cried, a number of times. I sweat, I danced. I got... a shot, I ate and... I had many epiphanies.
song: heaven - shygirl / be sweet - japanese breakfast
hold me tight, & fear me not (E) by boltcutters / @wordforworldisforest (TAM LIN AU): Me when I find a beautiful fairytale book in the evil yaoi section. Read if you love beautiful writing and if you want to find out what happens to lost little lambs that stray from the path.
song: i cant breathe - gwsn
Part of Your World (E) by weathermood / @weather-mood (LITTLE MERMAID AU): I never know where to start when praising POYW, from how real and alive the world feels to the sense of tragedy permeating Louis and Lestat's entire relationship, to how much it's made me miss the sea. Oh and also the monsterfucking ❤️
song: like real people do - hozier / sea, swallow me - cocteau twins
House of Gold (E) by dirtygoldensoul / @revolution-starter : I don't usually read A/B/O fics but I love this one so much, for many reasons, the main one being how bad the family dynamics get me... Can't recommend it enough 🧡
song: work song - hozier
Like a Heathen clung to the Homily (E) by @thelioncourts (SEX CLUB AU): One of my favorite insights into Louis' internality and his lingering religious trauma, and how it still affects him, chapter 4 almost made me cry... Can't wait to see where it goes next.
song: after dark - mister kitty
🥀Loumand🎭
canon/semi-canon compliant
dirges (E) by boltcutters / @wordforworldisforest: Can't make my way into loumand territory without mentioning my beautiful wife dirges. Ziska if you read this know that you will be dealt with shortly. Loumand bed death allegation hours: CLOSED FOREVER.
song: posing in bondage - japanese breakfast
Alluvium (E) by serpenstkirts / @knifeeater: The best way I can describe Laïs' fics and how they make me feel would be to liken the experience to drowning into a lake and being grateful for the dark water filling your lungs. This fic is about eroticized latex gloves and finger sucking btw.
song: only seeing god when i come - sega bodega
vanishing point (E) by serpentskirts / @knifeeater: Motorcycle sex as religious experience. Day 67 of my campaign to get Laïs in that writing room.
song: sunset - caroline polachek / nascar - stella smyth
Selfsame (E) by @vampdf: 70s LOUMAND CRUISING ERA MY BELOVED. Number 1 on the list of the crimes Eli has to answer for. 1000/10. Died five separate times reading this. Rolin look at me. Rolin dont listen to AMC. You need this in s2. It is crucial that we get this. Louis deserves it.
song: a pill to crush - evelyn / sulk - tr/st
Prey Drive (E) by The_Lame_Goat / @iwtvdramacd18: Speaking of loumand's 70s insane bdsm practices 💔💔💔 s2 script just leaked. Is your eternal vampire marriage hitting a rough spot? Try our newest predator/prey large-scale roleplay!
song: lullaby - the cure / on the run - kelela
Mark Deep (E) by The_Lame_Goat / @iwtvdramacd18: Goat you have my blood on your hands. No added commentary needed actually. The damage this fic has done to me is irreversible. Read if you want some more quality t4t loumand insanity.
song: pang - caroline polachek
Rumpelstiltskin (E) by weathermood / @weather-mood: Most normal loumand roleplay night. Louis wakes up in a tower. I literally refuse to say anything else until you all read it for yourself and go through the sheer range of emotions I've went through when first reading it. #Their princess/captor slay is real and alive and thriving. This fic is also part of the NMHMRGPINE (No Matter How Much Rashid Gets Paid It's Not Enough) verse btw.
who is she ? - i monster / big bad wolf - shakey graves
AUs
the night island (E) by @vampdf (MAFIA AU): I don't know much but I know Armand was made to be a mob boss and Louis was made to be a mob wife. One of the most insanity-inducing byproducts of the career dom s2 teaser Armand scene(tm).
song: bitch bites dog - cecile believe
🚬Armand/Louis/Daniel📚
thy fearful symmetry (E) by mothmaiden: 70s era. One of the flrst iwtv fics I ever read. Never left my mind since. Delicious dynamics between the three of them, got me gasping and covering my mouth many times. Can't recommend enough.
song: soul control - jessie ware
Little Kidnaps in the Dark (E) by @gayvampiredivorce : The damage little kidnaps has wrought on my crops, my mental health, my friends and family can NOT be overstated. Masterful interpretation of the evolution of their relationship and dynamics through the haze of vampiric existence. Anne could never have done this.
song: when the sun hits - slowdive
Lethe series (T/E) by serpentskirts / @knifeeater: Quite simply one of my favorite series not only in that tag but in general. Every sentence Laïs writes pulls me into a dark void that I hope I'm never getting out of.
song: hopedrunk everasking - caroline polachek
🖤Lestat/Louis/Armand/Daniel💀
Good to Love / Ruthless in Love (M) by themasterletters / @brightfelon (MODERN AU): Reading Toni's fics makes me feel like im a teen again, waiting anxiously for updates and calling up all my friends to scream and , am in love with all of Toni's readings of the characters but his Louis truly gets me. That fic doesn't only live rent free in my head it's also led me places I wouldnt go to with a gun. I have seen the best minds of my generation led to madness by toni's loumand. btw.
song: career boy - dorian electra / genghis khan - miike snow
Lestat/Louis/Armand
A Potentiality for Corruption (E) by @vampdf: The thing is. I can't talk about Eli's fics without talking about Potentiality. However. Talking about Potentiality also happens to send me into a state of delirious hysterics. Daphne Du Maurier found dead in a ditch. Charlotte Brontë shaking and crying. Guillermo Del Toro found jobless. There's a new Gothic classic in town.
song: ptolemaea - ethel cain
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hyperactivewhore · 10 months
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I think I have seen your account on tiktok replying to someone saying you have never liked Caroline
I don’t either bc I feel like she never really had a dramatic development like people say she did
what do you think
This may come out as bashing towards Rebekah and Caroline, that isn't my intention at all because I honestly love Rebekah and I don't hate Caroline, as many people seem to think, I just don't like her. I don't care enough for any fictional character to hate them, I assure you that.
I feel Caroline just had development in season two, where her character got more popular, but after that it feels the writers went back to make her the same girl from season one but less mean and more confident.
Don't get me wrong, her personality did have a change but I don't feel it was as big as everyone says. Tvdu generally gives character development to its character only to take it away in the next season. I feel the biggest example of this could be Damon and Klaus, with Damon it was because they never decided if they wanted him to be good or a villain and I don't have a reason as to why they decided to do that with Klaus.
The main reason of why I feel Caroline wasn't that great of a character it's because of how her presence didn't significantly alter the plot and she was just there most of the time, I don't think the seasons would have changed that much if she wasn't present and in my opinion, Candice has never been really good at acting so I really don't feel anything whenever she cries, or in any other of her emotional scenes. Phoebe Tonkin, in my opinion, is more or less the same, and this isn't me shitting in their acting skills, it's just my opinion and before anyone (yk who) decides to come for my throat, I'm not "bashing" them for being women. I think Nina Dobrev, Leah Pipes and Kat Graham, as well as Danielle Rose Russell, are one of the best actress the tvd universe has.
The fact that Caroline was a mix of toxic female harmful stereotypes just makes her look bad as a character and of course this wasn't Candice's fault, but Caroline, as well as Rebekah, was everything a female character shouldn't be if you went for the route of feminist woman and that is what Julie Pl*c wanted them to be. Both of them had traits that weren't at all feminist and they didn't deserve to be used as punching bags for toxic abusive men. Having Caroline and Rebekah grow out of these behaviors and traits would have made them good characters and more interesting to analyze, because what do we know of these characters outside the unhealthy/toxic mentality they have?
They made Caroline a mother when she never experienced any desire to be one, they used her for her body and she never said a word about this. Rebekah suddenly became obssesed with becoming a mother out of nowhere, but with the way she behaves it's clear it would not be healthy for her to have a baby. Both of them antagonized women at one point for jealousy/insecurities and they never apologized. Honestly, there are more reasons but I feel I explained the more important ones. I feel Caroline and Rebekah are really similar but at the same time drastically different, not the same character in a different font, because their personalities aren't that similar but both of them deserved better storyline that weren't tied to men.
You probably did see my account in tiktok. My user is @nikmikaelsonswhore, ironic because I'm bashing him half of the time and people get really pressed. If people want this in the anti Caroline Forbes tag tell me and I'll tag it properly, because I honestly don't know if this comes out as anti, but be sure to tell me anyway!
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neversetyoufree · 1 year
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I have not stopped thinking about The Vampyre since I read it, so here's some extra trivia for y'all about Lord Ruthven's name:
VnC's Lord August Ruthven is, of course, named after the Lord Ruthven from the short story "The Vampyre." Written by John William Polidori and published in 1819, "The Vampyre" is often cited as the first piece of true modern vampire fiction. It makes sense for Mochijun to want to reference something so genre-founding.
However! The circumstances surrounding this short story (and thus the Ruthven character) are both deeply weird and deeply fascinating.
For starters, do y'all know the famous story about how Frankenstein was written? It started as a challenge between friends stuck inside due to bad weather—write a frightening story for everyone's entertainment. Mary Godwin (soon to be Mary Shelley) and her future husband Percy Shelley were there, of course, but so were the poet Lord Byron and his personal doctor: a man named John Polidori.
While Mary penned the beginning of one of the most famous books in history, Byron's own attempt at horror was abandoned partway through. He wrote a fragment of a novel about an aristocratic vampire and a foolish young man that traveled with him to Turkey, but he never inteded to finish it. However, after learning how Byron thought the tale would end, Polidori eventually came to write his own (complete) version of a similar plot.
The Vampire in Byron's fragment went by the name of Augustus Darvell, but for the majority of "The Vampyre," Polidori's titular monster calls himself Lord Ruthven. This name comes from the novel Glenarvon by Lady Caroline Lamb, a book that openly parodied and mocked Lord Byron (Lamb's ex lover) with its main character.
Now, why did Polidori name the monstrous, cruel, almost parasitic monster in his story after a parody of his patient and boss? That's because their relationship was deeply fraught. I am not the person to speak accurately on this history, so let it suffice to say that Polidori did not have a rose-colored image of Lord Byron.
Byron was famously promiscuous and often in terrible debt. He doesn't seem to have been particularly nice to his doctor. If you read about their time together in any detail, it becomes obvious why Polidori might feel the urge to mock him as a monster.
Polidori wrote a vampire that seduced, tore through, and ruined innocent young maidens. He wrote this after traveling Europe with a man who was forced to flee England with a rake's reputation and a charge of sodomy. He named his vampire Ruthven, after a caricature of Byron, because his own Ruthven was also based on the man.
In other words, the first finished story to create the modern trope of the aristocratic vampire was in large part a parody of Lord Byron. It is a monster inspired by him and named after a character that existed to sleight him. It is also based on a story that Byron wrote.
And in addition to this being generally fascinating, there's something so fun about this in the context of VnC.
The Case Study of Vanitas is its own story, but it's also so chock full of allusions and references that you could almost call it a pastiche. Half its characters are half-crafted out of pre-existing characters and historical figures, but they're only ever halfway stolen. There's always something new built from the base of the reference.
And in a big way, that's what Polidori did back when he penned the first piece of modern vampire literature. His first vampire was partly a reference to a real man, partly borrowed from a pre-existing story (Byron's fragment), and partly conjured from Polidori's own imagination. It's history and literature and new content all bundled together, just like VnC is.
Lord August Ruthven is a reference to Polidori's Lord Ruthven, who was in turn a reference to Lord Byron. He's named after both Byron's Augustus Darvell and Polidori's Ruthven, and Polidori's Ruthven is named after Lamb's Ruthven (who was also based on Lord Byron). He's yet another layer on this tower of self-referential Ruthven-ness, now totally abstracted from any real Byron traits.
As much as Mochijun is playing with the tropes and ideas of this era of vampire literature, it's really fun to see how her tendency toward allusion and reference is itself a nod back to vampire literature's beginnings. It's another way in which VnC slots in as another link in this 200 year old literary conversation.
Anyway, if you want to learn more about the bonkers story behind the Vampyre, here's a link to a not super scholarly but very entertaining essay about it.
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